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dottores · 2 years

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LITTLE DARK AGE

haitani ran x fem!reader x haitani rindou

summary: eight years later, you finally return to tokyo and find yourself caught in the middle of a violent gang war between the two most ruthless criminal organizations of tokyo’s underworld, forced to choose between blood and love.

genre: bonten timeskip, angst, forbidden romance, childhood friends -> strangers -> lovers, 18+ MDNI

warnings: fem!reader, gang violence, drug abuse, alcohol abuse, explicit smut, polyamory, profanity, MCD, unedited, MTBA

chapter warnings: explicit smut, threesome, oral (m->f), unprotected sex, sub!reader, rindou a lil rough, neither of them can shut their mouths, dumbification

previous chapter -> masterlist -> next chapter

CHAPTER ⅩⅣ. MY ATLANTIS

EIGHT YEARS EARLIER.

They weren’t supposed to be here. You specifically had not told them when your flight was to avoid this confrontation, you had successfully evaded them for the past two days--since you had told them what you were planning to do--you had thought you had done it, that you had managed to escape Tokyo without having to face them. No matter how much you would have regretted it later, it wasn’t worth risking them convincing you to stay.

And you knew they would be able to if given the chance.

“Hey! We said ‘hold on,’” Ran’s voice was loud, sharp and even though you knew you should keep moving forward, away from them, your body refused to cooperate. You stopped still midstep in the large entrance of the airport, your chest felt heavy and your breath was slow. Everything around you started tunneling.

You could hear them approaching you from behind, everything except their footsteps and the muttered curses sounded dull and muted. Run, you told yourself, your body was tense, all fight or flight were activated as they drew closer. Run, they won't be able to chase you through security.

But you couldn’t bring yourself to move. Your feet were glued to the ground and by the time you thought you would be able to bring yourself to move, a hand was already wrapped tight around your wrist, tugging you around. You turned your gaze to the ground, staring at two familiar pairs of shoes in front of you.

“Well I don’t blame you for not being able to look at us,” Ran said spitefully, his voice somehow both soothing and grating to your ears at the same time, “but I think we deserve to be fully acknowledged, don’t you?”

You tore your gaze up from the floor, reluctantly looking up at them. Your eyes met Ran’s first, catching sight of the livid look in his eyes and the way his jaw was clenched tight. Your gaze darted away, but looking at Rindou was no better--instead of anger, you were faced with a sort of hurt expression that you weren’t quite sure you had ever seen on his face before.

Guilt weighed heavy on your chest, you felt as if the weight of the sky had been thrown onto your shoulders. Your lips parted to speak but you weren’t even sure what you wanted to say, so you ended up letting out a soft sigh and pressing your lips together again. Ran scoffed, as if he had been expecting you to do that.

“What the fuck, y/n?” Rindou spoke quieter, not as angry as Ran was. You could hear the way it cracked and you could hear the way he strained to get his words out.

“I don’t know what the big deal is,” you finally said, ignoring the fury that washed across Ran’s face at your words. “I told you I’d keep in touch.”

“You don’t know what the big deal is?” Ran hissed as he took another step toward you and your feet wouldn’t cooperate to move away from him, only able to tilt your face up to look up at him. “You only told us what was happening two fucking days ago, and then you avoided us every time we tried to talk to you. You weren’t even going to let us say goodbye.”

You swore the words hit you like knives to the chest. It’s for the best, you tried to convince yourself even though you knew damn well deep down that you were wrong.

They would have convinced you to stay, the stubborn part of you screamed at the part that wavered under Ran’s words. You know that. Your family. Izana. Mucho. Mister Botan. Nearly Terano.

Who would be next?

You couldn’t risk it. You couldn’t risk it.

It was only a matter of time before someone else died, and you wouldn’t let it be them. You had to leave--your uncle had given you two options, attend university to jumpstart the process of your own company or wait to inherit Izanagi. You had to start standing on your own two feet. You had to. Until you were confident that you’d be able to protect them without your uncle’s help, it wasn’t safe for you to be around.

Because even if the curse wasn’t real, you were still a real danger to them. Your uncle was neck deep in Tokyo’s underworld, he made tons of enemies abroad with his aggressive expansionist strategy for Izanagi--you had been targeted just a few months ago as a means to get to him and you couldn’t let Rindou and Ran get caught in the crossfire of that.

And they wouldn’t understand. You knew they wouldn’t understand. They’d never understand because they didn’t care about their own safety when it came to yours, they’d throw themselves on the blade for you at any given second if it meant you would be safe and you couldn’t let them do that.

They’d tell you to stay, they’d tell you that inheriting Izanagi from your uncle was the best move if it meant that the three of you got to stick together. They’d tell you ‘fuck the danger, we can take anything together’ but you knew you couldn’t. They didn’t even know half of the danger that came along with you and your uncle, and they didn’t understand that just being big delinquents on the streets of Roppongi was not the same as dealing with the ruthless business tycoons and oligarchs that could order their deaths with a wave of their hand and pocket change.

You didn’t even fully understand it yet, your uncle never was honest when you questioned him about it, he gave you non-answers or diversions, telling you to focus on building a foundation for your company before anything else.

You couldn’t risk it. You were doing what was right.

“You guys would have tried to convince me to stay,” you finally said, and you hated how your voice cracked, and how you still couldn’t meet either of their eyes. You hated even more how Ran noticed and how his hand shot out to curl around your jaw, tilting your face up to force you to look him in the eye.

“Of course, we would have,” Ran snapped, “We don’t want you to fucking leave-”

“I can’t let you guys hold me back,” your voice was loud as you interrupted him. Ran drew back as if he had been slapped, his hand dropping from your face. Rindou’s lips parted. Your heart sank from your chest to your feet, the air around you felt suffocating. You could feel the eyes of strangers on the three of you, judging. You wanted to swallow your own tongue, you wanted the ground to eat you whole.

“I didn’t mean that,” you said, voice little over a breath as you shook your head, “I didn’t mean that.”

Ran let out a shaky breath, nodding as he took a step away from you, “Yeah,” he agreed, “I bet you didn’t.”

Ran was now the one that couldn’t meet your eyes and your gaze swiveled to Rindou desperately, “Rin,” you tried but Rindou refused to look at you, staring down at the ground in front of him.

“Flight 404 to Munich will begin boarding in thirty minutes,” a woman said over the speakers, the words making your ears ring.

“You should go,” Rindou finally said, “That’s your flight, isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” Ran spoke as if he was trying to be snide and snappy, but you could tell it was only to try to cover the way your words had struck deep. You could see the hurt swimming in his eyes, the way he swallowed thickly. You could hear the underlying pain in his voice. “Wouldn’t want us to hold you back.”

You shook your head, you could feel tears pooling in your eyes and you tried to force them away because you knew you had no right to cry, “I didn’t mean it like that,” you said again, “I-I have to do this. You don’t understand-”

“Of course, we don’t understand,” Rindou’s voice was sharper than it had ever been with you, your throat squeezed, “We don’t understand because you don’t fuckin’ tell us anything anymore. Help us understand, we want to understand.”

Rindou stared at you, waiting for you to say something but when you stayed silent, he only scoffed. But what the fuck were you supposed to say to them? How could you make them understand that you were doing this for them? For Izana? For the rest of your friends? They would never be able to come to terms with you doing this on your own but you knew them being with you and trying to help would only make things harder on you.

If you did this alone, you would get it done faster--you’d be able to be with them, and be happy again, sooner. There would be fewer risks to consider, less things for people to try to use against you.

You would get back to them faster. You were doing the right thing.

“Yeah,” Rindou said when you didn’t speak, sharing a look with Ran that only the two of them could decipher. “That’s what I thought.”

“I-I’m going to school,” you said, and you knew you had to leave. You couldn’t miss your flight, but you didn’t want to leave them--not like this. Why the fuck did they come? “I’m going to school, and when I’m at school, I’m going to be setting up my company. Once everything is settled, I’ll come back--or I’ll even bring you there with me, show you everything. I promise.”

“Why can’t you do that here?” Rindou demanded, taking a step closer to you, “Why the fuck do you have to go across the world to do that?”

“That-” That wasn’t your choice, that was your uncle’s, he was adamant about you going to a foreign university, and he was refusing to help you if you didn’t. And you had a feeling that he wanted you to go across the world to do it because he knew damn well that Rindou and Ran would be distractions. “My uncle-”

“Of course,” Rindou shook his head, there was a smile on his lips that didn’t meet his eyes, “Of fucking course.”

“Stop it,” you said, voice cracking, “I didn’t want this to happen-”

“This was your choice,” Rindou hissed, leaning in so close that it had you dizzy, “Your fucking choice, don’t talk about how you didn’t want this to happen. You chose this.”

“I don’t want to fight,” you said loudly, “I don’t want to fight, why can’t you just believe me when I say I’m doing what’s best? When have I ever-”

“Lied to us? A lot,” Rindou said dryly, and you flinched back.

“When have I ever let you guys down?” you finished quietly and the anger on Rindou’s face faded as he looked back at Ran again, “Please just trust me.”

Neither of them spoke, and you let out another shaky breath, squeezing your eyes shut for a moment to try to push away the tears. Did they not trust you anymore?

Could you blame them?

But then Rindou’s shoulders dropped, he looked away, and you knew he had given in and this time you couldn’t blink back the tears. You let your bag drop to the floor as you moved toward the two of them, burying your face in Rindou’s chest and wrapping your arms around his waist. Neither of them reacted for a moment until you felt Rindou’s hand come up to hold the back of your head, cradling it to his chest, and you bit back a sob as your arms tightened around his waist, trying to bask in his warmth for as long as you could.

“You promise?” Ran’s voice was hoarse as he finally spoke. You nodded against Rindou but Ran only spoke up again, “Say it.”

“I promise,” you agreed, “I promise, I promise as soon as I can I’ll bring you there with me, I promise.”

Ran inhaled deeply through his nose before tugging you toward him and your arms dropped from Rindou as you flung yourself at Ran, wrapping your arms around his shoulders. He pressed his face into your neck and you tried to ignore how his lashes were wet against your skin.

“I’m going to miss you guys so much,” you took in a wet breath, body trembling, “So much, so much.”

You could stay there forever wrapped up in their arms--you didn’t care that people were around watching, you didn’t care that this would get back to your uncle and he would be irritated at your little display of emotion, all you cared about was them, and being with them, staying with them.

You didn’t want to leave.

“Flight 404 to Munich will begin boarding in twenty minutes.”

The words felt like knives scraping down your bones, dragging you right back to reality. Ran’s arms dropped from around your waist and your feet touched the ground again, standing in front of them. You wiped away the tears as best as you could.

“You’ll call?” Rindou asked quietly, and you dragged your gaze up to meet his, catching the reluctance and the longing thinly veiled beneath his eyes.

“Every day,” you promised, nodding frantically, “Every day.”

“... and you won’t forget about us?” there was something vulnerable in Ran’s voice that you had never quite heard before from him, even with all the years you spent with them. You looked up at him, violet eyes meeting yours, and you shook your head.

“Never,” you said, “Never in a million years. I could never forget about you guys.”

He let out a breath that you didn’t even notice he was holding, nodding his head toward security. “You better go,” he said quietly, “Still gotta get through security.”

And you knew you had to, but you couldn’t get your feet to cooperate, they felt glued to the ground in front of them. “I-I’ll call you while we’re boarding. And when I land. And when I get to campus. And-”

“We get it,” Ran’s lips pulled up into a small smile for the first time in days, weeks maybe. “Go.”

Your fingers trembled at your side, you wrapped your arms around your torso, “I love you guys,” you said, “It’s gonna suck without you.”

Ran glanced back down at the ground.

“We love you too,” Rindou murmured, a strange tone to his voice, “you’ve gotta go. You’re going to miss your flight.”

You nodded, you knew he was right, and it took all your will power to turn around and pick up the bag you dropped. You stood there for a moment, facing the short line to security. And you debated turning back around, taking one last look.

You won’t leave. You knew if you turned around you’d see them standing there, and you knew it was only a matter of time before that strong facade the two of them put up would crumble, and you knew if you saw you wouldn’t be going anywhere, you’d run right back into their arms.

You shut your eyes briefly before walking toward security, trying your best to take even breaths in and out, trying your best to keep your shoulders from shaking.

One foot in front of the other, you got this, you thought to yourself as you placed your bag on top of the baggage scanner. You stood there for a moment, lost in your own thoughts until the airport security called out to you sharply, waving you over to the metal detector.

One foot in front of the other.

You were doing what was best.

This was only temporary.

But you couldn’t stop the dark, heavy feeling from settling over you with each step you took away from them. A sort of foreboding feeling that made you think that things would not be as simple as you wanted them to be.

---

PRESENT.

Relentless. They were absolutely relentless and you could not keep up. Even having expected this from them, it still didn’t prepare you for actually trying to deal with them. They barely even gave you time to speak--one of them would lean in close and ask a question, and the other would hop on top of it to badger you with even more.

“Aw, that’s so adorable, you’ve liked us for that long?”

“Who did you like first? I bet it was me.”

“It was Rindou, wasn’t it? I caught you drooling over him once.”

“No shit, did you really?”

“He did not-”

“I did, do you remember that night we dragged her to Maharaja?”

“Ran-”

“Really? That night?”

“Mhm.”

“Have you ever had dreams about us?”

You shot Ran a weird look, "Of course I've dreamt about you guys," you said, not entirely sure of what he was getting out, "Don't be stupid."

"No, no," Rindou snorted behind you as Ran spoke. "That's not what I meant."

You stared ahead blankly for a moment, trying to figure out what the question hidden behind his words was, and as soon as it hit you, you swore you wanted to sink into the bed and disappear--the two of them laughing once they realized you had put it together.

You felt like you were on fire as you turned your head to the side to look at Ran, not sure you had heard him correctly, which was evidently a mistake considering how close he was leaning to you. Your breath caught as you tried to lean back away from him but his eyes were alight with a sort of mischief that you hadn’t seen in years as he followed you, unperturbed, only leaning in closer.

His lips were barely a hair’s width from yours and you couldn’t breathe, and you couldn’t move any further back because you had scrambled right back into Rindou, who wrapped an arm loosely around your waist to hold you still. Your eyes flickered down to Ran’s lips, watching as they slowly curled up into a smile that had your blood running hot.

“We’re just curious,” Rindou murmured, and a shiver shot down your spine when his lips brushed your ear, “C’mon, the least you can do is entertain us, yeah?”

And you really stuck between a rock and a hard place because of course you had, you couldn’t control what you dreamt of at night and you had been attracted to them--if you lied, they would know anyway because you knew damn well they’d be able to read right through you. And that would only make it worse on you for trying to hide it from them.

Why were they like this? You wanted to grab them both by the shoulders and shake them, rattle their tiny brains inside their head until they see sense. Now was not the time to be fucking around, now was not the time to be trying to get you flustered and unfooted but you knew from the way they kept sharing looks with each other that they wouldn’t listen.

“Should we take the silence as a yes, Rindou?” Ran almost giggled as he tilted his head to the side, letting his lips graze your jaw.

“If she’s not gonna admit it, I say we just leave her like this.” Your head snapped to the side at Rindou’s words, eyes meeting his. He raised his eyebrows mockingly, “What? You don’t want that?”

Ran snickered and your breath caught as his lips finally pressed firmly against the underside of your jaw, lips dragging down your neck--slow, wet, heavy--it felt like he was leaving a trail of burns in his wake with each kiss and you just couldn’t think straight. They should not have this much of an effect over you, it was just Rindou and Ran but as you tried to shake your head and tell them just how ridiculous they were being, Rindou’s hands slid down your body, the pads of his fingers pressing against your inner thigh, nudging your thighs apart.

“Rindou-” you gasped, looking back at him again but you faltered when you noticed the grin on his lips and the way his eyes were lit up. “We shouldn’t, not now-”

You felt Ran’s hand come up to your face as he pulled away from your neck, cupping your cheek softly and forcing you to look at him. His face was more serious than it was previously, and you couldn’t help but hesitate.

“Relax,” he murmured. “You’re right, and we know we’re not safe yet, but we are right now, even if not for long. This might be our only chance.”

You swallowed thickly, “Don’t say that,” you said quietly, “There’ll be plenty-”

“You know as well as we do that there are no assurances in our line of work, especially in situations like this. For all we know tomorrow we’ll be back on the run,” and your throat felt dry because you knew Ran was right. “We’ve gotta take advantage of moments like this.”

Rindou and Ran shared a look over your shoulder, and you shut your eyes, trying to figure out what to do. You wanted them you’ve always fucking wanted them, but you were scared. And you weren’t even sure why you were scared. They wanted you, you wanted them, it’s something that all of you had wanted for so fucking long and Ran was right, your futures were still uncertain--tonight you were safe, tomorrow might not bring the same assurances.

With that thought in mind and shaky fingers, you leaned in to press your lips against Ran’s again. Ran let out a surprised hum against yours as if he hadn’t been expecting you to give in that easy, hand sliding down to cup your neck, fingers intertwined with your hair. You brought your own hand down to where Rindou’s was resting on your thigh, moving it back to where it had been on your inner thigh.

Your hands slid up to rest on Ran’s shoulders, nails digging into his skin as he pressed closer to you, tongue darting out to swipe against your bottom lip. Your lips parted on instinct for him, eyes fluttering shut as he pushed his tongue into your mouth, pressing down on yours.

You let out a soft moan into his mouth as Rindou’s fingers slipped down even further, pressing against your clothed cunt before you felt him grab your hips, smiling against your neck.

“Ran,” he said, and Ran pulled back and you tried to follow him but you faltered, yelping as Rindou lifted your hips off the bed, giving Ran the room to slide your pants off your body before placing you back down on the bed between his legs. You tried to snap your thighs together but Rindou’s hands were back on your thighs in an instant, keeping them spread open.

“Rin,” you said sharply, eyes wide.

“Relax,” Rindou echoed Ran’s words, and your breath caught as Ran dipped down lower between your legs, soft strands of hair brushing your inner thighs. “Hurry up or we’re switching places.”

“Shut up,” Ran murmured, “wanna take my time with her.”

You swore your heart was in your throat as you watched him, nose grazing the thin cloth of your panties as he pressed a kiss to your inner thigh, Rindou’s fingers digging into your skin to keep you in place.

“Yeah, well, I want a taste too,” Rindou’s voice was irritated, muffled against your skin.

Ran rolled his eyes, “You’ll get your taste, stop bitchin’.”

They spoke to each other as if you weren’t there and it was pissing you off but every time you tried to move, or say something, Rindou’s grip would just tighten and they would speak over you.

“Stop fucking around,” you snapped, getting fed up.

Ran and Rindou both went quiet, Ran looked up at you through his lashes, violet eyes dark and lidded, “You’re so impatient,” he chided. “... Have half a mind not to give you what you want.”

Your scowl deepened, “Then don’t,” you challenged, staring down at Ran, who met your gaze, eyes just as heated as yours were.

After a moment, he scoffed, tongue pressing against the inside of his cheek before he shook his head, letting out a huff of laughter. “You’re a piece of work,” he muttered before his jaw clenched tight as he all but ripped your panties down off your legs.

Your eyes shot open in surprise, instinctively trying to shut your legs again but Rindou was once again prying them open and his grip was too strong for you to try to fight against it. Your face was hot in embarrassment as Ran eyed your now bare cunt intently, as if trying to figure out what exactly he wanted to do.

“Ran,” your voice was weaker now, it edged on pleading. You hated it. “Stop lookin’ at me like that.”

“I’ll look at you however I want to, thought you wanted me to stop fucking around,” Ran responded immediately, not drawing his eyes up in the slightest. “You’ve got the prettiest pussy, I knew you would. Imagined it all the time.”

Rindou rested his chin on your shoulder, looking down to watch as Ran’s fingers brushed your cunt, gathering some slick before rubbing a feather-light circle over your clit. Your body shuddered in response to the touch, hips trying to jerk up against his hand.

Rindou hummed softly at the way your body reacted before one of his hands slid to your chin, turning your face to his to press his lips to yours. His hand shifted to your neck, holding it firmly as he deepened the kiss, teeth nearly clashing against yours.

His kiss was different from Ran’s--a bit rougher but just as intense, one of your hands came up to grasp the wrist of the hand wrapped around your neck. His grip tightened as you tried to pull back to breathe, keeping you in place. You felt dizzy, and you weren’t sure if it was because you weren’t getting any air to your lungs or if it were just because of the situation.

Maybe both, you realized, inhaling sharply as Ran finally ducked his head down between your legs. You tensed, whimpering against Rindou’s lips as Ran licked a long stripe between your folds, the tip of his tongue swirling around your clit before he pulled back again.

“Taste as good as I imagined too,” you could practically hear the wolfish grin on his face as he spoke before he dove right back between your legs, large hands curling around your thighs to keep your legs spread as Rindou let go of your other leg, letting his hand slide up your body beneath your shirt, palming one of your breasts in his hand as his lips left yours to start trailing down your neck.

Your jaw went half-slack as Ran buried his face in your cunt, nose nudging your clit as he dragged his tongue along your slit. Your free hand flew to your mouth, trying to hold back the cry that almost escaped your lips but Ran let go of one of your thighs to grab your wrist, pinning it down to the bed next to you.

Your hips instinctively tried to grind up against his face, thighs squeezing his head, but Ran brought his forearm down on your lower stomach in response, pinning your hips from moving.

“Don’t hide from us,” Rindou murmured against your skin, and your eyes fluttered shut as his teeth grazed your skin before he bit down, pulling a moan from your throat. “Gonna make you feel good.”

A broken gasp escaped your lips as Ran let out a low groan against your cunt, your eyes shot open as you tried to calm your erratic breathing. Ran was undeterred even as you tried to squirm away again, the pleasure hitting you too hard and too fast for you to control--he pressed his face deeper into your cunt, tongue tracing circles between your folds, flicking over your clit, fucking in and out of you. Through a hazy gaze, you could see the way he was trying to grind his hips against the mattress, desperate for any sort of friction. Rindou’s fingers were pinching gently at your nipples, teeth carelessly biting down against your skin but you could only focus on the rising heat pooling in your lower stomach.

“Ran,” you sobbed--you felt overwhelmed already, you wondered if this was how people felt when they teamed up on their enemies together. They were moving too fast for you to keep up, their hands were everywhere, playing with your body like it was some sort of instrument that only they knew how to play. Your head felt fuzzy and your body was shaking, “Ran, I-”

Rindou bit down again. Hard this time. Your eyes knocked back white for a second, a sharp cry escaping your lips.

“Pay attention to me,” Rindou said so coldly that it had you reeling, but you couldn’t concentrate with the feeling of Ran between your thighs, playing with your clit with his tongue, the wet, sloppy sounds of him tongue fucking your cunt was all that was running through your head. Rindou’s words went in one ear, out the other and it only made him even more angry. “I said-”

Ran’s teeth grazed your clit as Rindou spoke, and you were sure that he did it on purpose if the huff of laughter he let out was anything to say about it as another loud, high-pitch moan of his name resounded through the room. You reached down with one hand to tug at the short, purple strands of hair--you weren’t sure if you were trying to pull him off or press him closer.

Everything felt hazy and foggy, you couldn’t tell whose hands were whose, you couldn’t tell what Rindou was saying but you knew he was getting more and more annoyed with each passing second, your vision was blurred with tears and your head felt hot. Your entire body felt like it was on fire and you knew you should be embarrassed by how your moans were becoming increasingly loud, by how your body strained against Ran’s arm, grinding up against his face as you pushed him down even more with your hand, but you just couldn’t bring yourself to care.

Ran’s tongue worked like magic, quick and efficient movements that had you getting pushed to the brink too, too fast. Heat shot through your abdomen, your thighs tensed around his head. You could get addicted, you were sure of it, eyes rolling back as he sucked your clit into his mouth.

“I’m ‘nna cum,” you cried, “Ran, Ran-“

Rindou’s grip on your waist was borderline painful as your back arched against his chest, body spasming as one last swirl of his tongue around your clit had you spiraling right over the edge. Your thighs tightened around Ran’s head, letting out a loud, shaky cry of his name as you came all over his tongue, body trembling in Rindou’s arms.

You gasped for breath, head spinning as you tried to recover but Rindou did not give you the chance. He hauled you up, forcing you to your hands and knees. Your arms were too shaky to hold yourself up, chest falling flat against the mattress. You turned your head to the side as best as you could, trying to look back at Rindou but he fisted your hair hard, pressing your face back down into the mattress.

“Don’t be so rough with her. It’s not her fault that she couldn’t focus on you. Maybe you should’ve done more,” Ran chided, though he sounded amused as slapped Rindou’s hand off of your head. You felt his hands cup your chin, lifting your face up far more gently than Rindou’s grip had been. His fingers stroked your cheekbone for a moment, and you couldn’t help the way you leaned into his touch, eyes fluttering shut. “You pissed him off,” he murmured, “You know how he gets when he doesn’t get attention--he’s always been sensitive about it.”

“Fuck you, Ran.”

“Huh?” was all you could say as you forced your eyes back open to look at him, brows furrowed as you tried to process what he said but you still felt half-out of it. “R-”

Your voice faltered when you felt the tip of Rindou’s cock nudge against your entrance, a whimper muffled at your lips as he slowly began to push in, your head fell limp again, face resting in Ran’s lap.

“Oh god,” you gasped. Rindou was big, bigger than anyone else you’d ever slept with, you could feel every inch of him molding your walls. He stretched you out in a way that you’d never been before, your walls burned with each inch he pushed inside you, and you couldn’t tell if it was a sort of burn that hurt or if it was a pleasant one. Your body trembled violently as you tried to adjust to his size. “Oh god, Rin, gimme a sec, gim-”

Rindou did not, in fact, give you a second, and you were sure he did it just to be spiteful, hips snapping against your ass to bury his cock as deep inside you as possible. Your lips parted in a silent cry, face pressed against Ran’s sweats as he stroked your hair gently, as if trying to soothe you.

You took in a ragged breath, body tense, fingers curling around the sheets as you tried to adjust to his size but Rindou once again did not give you the chance, already drawing his hips back to drive his cock into you. The moan that left your lips was absolutely obscene, nails ripping through the thin sheets, sobbing against Ran.

He fucked you at a pace that shouldn’t have been possible. Your fingers shook around the sheets, chest heaving but every heavy thrust stole all of the breath from your lungs, each in-and-out of his cock had you reeling, barely able to think straight. Rindou’s fingers dug into your hips, dragging you back to meet every thrust as he fucked you onto him, hitting inside you so deep that you swore it had your vision spotty. You think you’ve cum already, but you aren’t even sure--it certainly felt like you did, your body was shaking in the aftershocks of what seemed to have been an orgasm but you didn’t even remember the build up to it, you didn’t even remember finishing again.

You tried to look up at Ran, eyes teary, but his gaze were dark and lidded as he watched you, an expression on his face that you couldn’t quite decipher before Rindou was shifting positions.

His hand moved up from your waist to your hair, pulling you up hard and you winced, dizzy, mind numb. His hand dropped from your hair to curl around your neck to hold you up, back pressed against his chest. He didn’t falter in his pace once, hips snapping against yours, the lewd sound of skin slapping on skin, the sloppy sound of his cock bullying deep in your cunt ringing in your ears. Filthy, it was all filthy, you should be embarrassed by the noises escaping your lips, by the way your body was reacting to Rindou, by the way you kept begging for more when he was already giving you all he had.

He turned your head to the side and pressed his lips against yours, tongues sliding against each others’, teeth clashing. His other hand slid down your body, rubbing circles on your clit, and the moans you were letting out into his mouth were becoming louder, needier, your blood was running hot and your head felt light.

“Feel so fuckin’ good, god, love you s’much,” Rindou groaned against your lips, “C’mon, wanna feel you cum on my cock again.”

And those words were all you needed to send you spiraling again, crying out loud against his lips, body thrashing against his as he held you in place, continued playing with your clit, fucking you through your high. You felt him pull away, leaning his head back to let out a low moan when your walls squeezed and fluttered around him.

You could feel his hips stutter against yours as your body went limp in his hold, slumping forward, only held up by the hand wrapped around your neck and the other went still rubbing slow circles over your clit. Ran was saying something to Rindou as he spilled his cum deep inside you, filling you up so full that his cum was leaking out of your cunt even with his cock plugging you up.

You fell unmoving against the bed when Rindou groaned and pulled out of you. Your body shuddered, thighs shaking and cum pooling beneath you as it spilled out of you, making a mess on the bed beneath you. You tried to steady your breath, gather the strength to push up from the puddle of cum to retain some sort of control but you couldn’t find the strength in your limbs to do it. Your arms and legs felt like noodles, your mind wasn’t even fully there.

“C’mon now,” you heard Ran murmur distantly. “Don’t tap out on us yet.”

You felt an arm wrap around your bicep and in one swift motion, you were pulled on top of Ran. You were unsteady and weak, barely able to hold yourself up but you didn’t need to--instead, two strong hands grabbed you by the waist, holding you up right.

Your vision was dizzy as you looked down at him, his lips crawled up into a slow smirk as he looked up at you through his lashes. You let out a whimper when you felt his cock slide between your folds, slipping against the mess Rindou made of your pussy, lips parting as his tip caught your clit, pressing softly against it.

“Want you to ride me,” Ran said quietly. “Can you do that for me, pretty?”

You felt hot at the pet name and you tried to focus on what he was asking you. Want you to ride me, he had said and you took in a shaky breath, hesitant because you weren’t sure if you could handle another orgasm. Your head and body felt fuzzy, as if you were on the verge of passing out, pins and needles pricking your limbs, breath heavy and slow. They had made you cum too many times, too quick and Ran wanted more.

“I-I dunn-” you began but, much like his brother, Ran didn’t give you the chance to answer his question, pressing the tip of his cock against your entrance.

“She can take it,” Rindou said, and your eyes were wide as you looked back at him, lips parted to try to snap something at him but whatever words were on your lips died as Ran bucked his hips up, pushing his cock inside of you.

You tried to do as he asked--thighs tense and trembling as you attempted to rock your hips against his, fuck yourself on his cock, but you were slow. It was too slow for you and evidently too slow for Ran if the sharp click of his tongue had anything to say about it.

His hands came to your waist, fingers pressing into your skin as he took over, too impatient to let you take your pace.

You couldn’t do anything but let Ran do what he wanted, limp and unable to fight back even if you wanted to--almost like a doll for him to use for whatever he wants. Your moans cut off as he bounced you easily on his cock, biceps flexing with each movement--he was longer than Rindou, hitting impossibly deeper, but not as thick. And you knew in the back of your head that you shouldn’t be doing this with him, you could see all the bruises marring his chest and abdomen and you opened your mouth to tell him that but the only thing that escaped your lips was another set of slurred moans.

Your vision was rather blurred and spotty--a part of you wondered again if you were on the verge of passing out because it was really starting to feel like it. Ran didn’t seem to be in pain, head tossed back, lips parted, violet eyes rolled back as he fucked you hard, hips snapping up to meet you with every bounce. Grip tight, borderline painful but the pain didn’t even register, too lost in the feeling of his cock dragging against your walls, still reeling from the three? four? orgasms that you’d already had, the ones that the two of them didn’t even give you a chance to recover from before they were pushing you toward your next.

Your hands were curled weakly around Ran’s forearms, nails scratching at his skin. You were going to cum again, you could feel this one coming fast and strong, you could feel the way your body felt like it was on fire, you could feel the way your body was shaking, the way your vision was going in and out, you could feel the tears spilling down your cheeks, the breathy, gasps of his name--little more than slurred babbles that only spurred him on even more, fucking you harder, faster, moaning your name louder.

You tried to warn him but the high came faster than you expected, mind going blank, vision going white and then dark. You weren’t sure how long you were out of it, everything felt dull and muted except for the feeling of Ran’s cock pistoning in and out of you as he used your body to chase his own release, head lolled to the side, eyes rolled back, jaw slack and you could feel the drool pooling at the corner of your lips as he just kept going, ignoring how you were barely even conscious in his hold to get himself off.

It could have been two minutes, it could have been twenty before you were being laid back on the bed, both Rindou and Ran’s cum leaking out of you profusely, body uncooperative as you tried to move and get yourself comfortable. You weren’t sure how many more times you had cum--too many considering you couldn’t even respond to the soft words they were telling you, your tongue too heavy in your mouth to even think of it.

You barely understood half of what they were saying and if it had been anybody else you were with, you knew you would have been anxious, scared. You hated being put in vulnerable positions--you always had, and that only amplified once you had gotten involved with the shadier side of the world.

You could feel Rindou curled at your side, lips pressed to your temple, while Ran wrapped his arm around your waist. “I love you,” he murmured, and you tried to say it back but the only thing you could let out was an unintelligible babble that had Ran snorting in amusement. You felt a distinct urge to slap him but couldn't raise your hand up from your side. “Go to sleep.”

Your eyes drooped shut at his words, body and mind exhausted and content, happy, in a way that you hadn't been in a long time... in a way that you weren't sure you had ever been, if you were being honest.

You had never had them as wholly and completely as you did in that moment, and it was something you never wanted to end. But as you drifted off to sleep in their arms, you couldn't help the dreadful feeling that began to stir in your stomach as you thought of what the next few days might bring.

----

You woke up tangled up in the sheets with Ran, the blinds had been pulled open--surely by Rindou, who didn’t want to wait hours for the two of you to finally wake up. You scowled as you tried to disentangle yourself from Ran without waking him up, knowing that he needed the rest.

Your body felt sore and your face felt hot as you recalled what you had done last night with them but you forced yourself to shake your head, pressing a soft kiss against his forehead before stealing his shirt and slipping it on, making your way out of the room toward the kitchen.

You could smell something cooking in there--eggs, you realized and you smiled lightly to yourself when you caught sight of Rindou at the stove, phone pressed to his ear as he spoke to someone on the phone. You leaned against the wall, watching him absently flip the egg, gaze trailing down his chest, following his tattoos until they disappeared beneath his sweats.

“... are you sure? Keep checking in at some of the other safehouses before talking to anyone else, especially-” Rindou cut himself off, finally noticing you. He gave you a small smile before speaking again, “Never mind, I’ll talk to you later.”

Rindou hung up the phone and placed it down on the counter, you made your way over to him, “What was that all about?” you asked quietly, arms slipping around his waist, chin propped up on his chest to look up at him.

“Don’t worry about it,” he responded, ducking his head down to press his lips against yours briefly, “Ran’s still sleeping?”

“What do you think?” you asked dryly, wondering if you should push or not--but you knew Rindou never liked it and you weren’t sure you wanted to deal with an argument.

Rindou rolled his eyes, “Of course he is,” he muttered as he plated one of the eggs and passed it over to you before grabbing one for himself. The two of you walked over to the counter, sitting on one of the stools. His gaze drifted over you, watching as you ate a forkful of the eggs. You looked at him suspiciously.

“What?” you asked.

“Nothing,” he said quietly, “If you had told me a few weeks ago we’d be here…” he trailed off, shaking his head, and guilt pooled in your stomach.

“I’m sorry,” you told him, gaze dropping down to the ground.

“I know,” he responded and you let out a breath, your chest tight. You knew you didn’t deserve it, but you hoped one day they would forgive you.

The two of you ate in silence for a few moments after that until Rindou finally spoke up again, “How did you even get Ran out of there?”

“Hanma Shuji,” you said, mind drifting back to the gold-eyed man, wondering what exactly he was up to right now. “His men were supposed to be watching him, he called them off and gave me the time I needed to get Ran out of there.”

Rindou looked surprised, “Hanma?” his brows were furrowed deep in suspicion, “Why? Ran and Hanma hated each other in Tenjiku. Or, Ran hated Hanma at least, and didn’t try to hide it.”

“Really?” you asked curiously, “Why?” You thought about what he said a little more. “Hanma was in Tenjiku with you guys?”

Rindou made a quiet noise of agreement as he took another bite of his eggs. “Yeah, never saw him again after that fight though,” he said, “and I’m not sure. Ran never really got into it, he just said that he had weird vibes and it made him uncomfortable. Ran’s always been pretty good at reading people, so I just went along with it.”

You frowned, “Weird, I never got off vibes from him. He’s helped me a lot. Saved my life at the auction, he shielded me from the explosion.”

Rindou grinned and nudged you, “You also suck at reading people,” he teased.

You gaped, “I totally do not,” you said, offended, “I-”

You faltered when you remembered what happened after the Munich Incident, with your bodyguard--a phantom pain itched at your back, you slumped, eyeing Rindou, incredibly annoyed.

“He helped me a lot, when he didn’t have to,” you told him, “I’d trust him if it came down to it.”

Rindou eyed you for a second before nodding, “Okay,” he said, “I trust you.”

Your breath caught at his words--the truth behind them, the way he said it so firmly. You pressed your lips together tight, trying to hide the tremble as you reached down and grabbed his free hand, squeezing it gently. He noticed how much the three words affected you if the soft look on his face had anything to say about it, and he only let out a breath before leaning in and pressing his lips to the top of your head.

“It’ll probably be a week or two before things calm down enough for us all to get out of here,” Rindou said. “We should keep low. Ran and I’ll avoid going to any meetings if Mikey calls them, but I don’t know how long we’ll be able to do that. I checked around the safehouse, this place is stocked to last a while so we won’t need to go out and get anything.”

You let out a sigh, “I hate being cooped up,” you murmured, leaning your head on his shoulder.

You could practically hear the leer in his voice as he spoke, “Mmm, I dunno, I think I’ll enjoy it, gonna get to make good use of that pretty pussy after you deprived us of it for so long.”

You gasped, jabbing his abdomen with your fingers but he didn’t even flinch, snickering to himself as he rose to his feet, picking up both of your plates to bring them over to the sink. You rested your chin on your hand, elbow propped up on the table as you watched him clean the dishes.

“Why didn’t you guys say anything back then?” you asked quietly, watching as Rindou looked back at you over his shoulder. You tried to ignore the way the muscles on his back flexed at the motion. Tried.

“Why didn’t you?” Rindou countered.

Your eyes drew away from him toward a window, a heavy feeling settling over you as you remembered what exactly your mental state was like before you left for Munich.

“You know why,” you said quietly, avoiding his gaze.

Rindou let out a breath, shutting off the water and placing the dishes on the drying rack. He stepped around the kitchen to stand in front of you again. He cradled your head to his chest, your eyes fluttered shut as he scratched the back of your head gently, lulling your eyes shut.

“Ran wanted me to say something,” Rindou said after a moment, and you lifted your head from his chest to look up at him questioningly. Why didn’t you? was on the tip of your tongue, but you didn’t need to voice it, “I knew Ran loved you. I couldn’t.”

“Oh,” you said softly, wondering just how oblivious you had been to both of their feelings. You swallowed thickly, looking away, trying to change the subject, “Um, what do you wanna do? We can-”

“I can think of a few things,” Rindou winked at you, and you rolled your eyes, pushing him back to rise to your feet.

“You’re unbearable,” you muttered.

“You love it,” he shot right back.

“Don’t remind me.”

A smile spread across his lips at your words, nudging you gently with his shoulder, “Movie?” he asked quietly. “Before Ran wakes up and starts whining about food?”

“Sure,” you said after a moment, “What movie?”

You waited for him to offer a movie, but he didn’t. The two of you stood there in silence for a few seconds. Just as he opened his mouth to suggest a movie, you did too.

“The Conjuring?”

“Star Wars?”

Both of you went silent again, expressions going flat as you stared at each other.

“Absolutely fucking not.”

“No way in hell.”

Rindou’s brows furrowed, “It’s my turn to pick,” he snapped, “You made us watch the fucking Exorcist the last time we watched a movie together. I had nightmares for two weeks straight.”

“I don’t give a shit if it’s your turn,” you snapped right back, as relentless as ever, “I’m not watching the Empire Strikes Back for the fiftieth fucking time, Rindou.”

“It’s a good fucking movie,” Rindou responded heatedly, “You don’t even pay attention!”

“Because I don’t like it! Maybe if you weren’t such a fuckin’ piss baby, you’d enjoy horror movies.”

“Hey! What the fuck did you just call me?”

“What’re you? Deaf? I know you heard me."

“I’m putting on Star Wars.”

“No, you are not! Get back here, Rindou!”

"Will you shut up? You're going to wake Ran up."

"Says you!"

—

wordcount: 6.7k

REBLOGS N FEEDBACK HIGHLY APPRECIATED

— pls do not nitpick tiny mistakes or whatever, i’d like feedback on plot/character development. this was the hardest chapter for me to write so far :')

#ran x reader #rindou x reader #ran smut #rindou smut #tokyo revengers smut #tokyo revengers x reader

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entishramblings · 1 year

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The Innocence of Brutality Pt.2 [Legolas/F!Reader]

A.N: so here is part two! please let me know what you think!

Request: none

Pairing: Legolas X Fem!Reader

Summary: The Reader is Rámaitë Mahtar, a warrior spirit race, and she meets the fellowship on their quest to destroy the ring.

Disclaimer: Any mythology relating to the Rámaitë Mahtar is not canon as I made up Rámaitë Mahtar. Also, all elvish was translated from a translator site—it may not be accurate.

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: nudity (not sex), mentions of war, mentions of torture, violence, fluff

MASTERLIST | AO3 | WATTPAD

The Innocence of Brutality Masterlist

"So," Pippin began the next morning. "Who's gonna wake her?"

The fellowship stood in a line in front of (Y/N). Various expressions of worry, concern, and irritation upon their brows.

"Legolas," Aragorn stated simply.

"Why me?"

"She trusts you. She told you her name."

The elf sent his friend a glare, for that excuse was becoming annoying, but regardless he cautiously approached the winged woman.

He squatted down in front of her. "(Y/N)," he stated simply.

No movement.

"(Y/N)," he repeated.

No movement.

"It is morning. You must wake."

He lifted his hand. He knew he was going to regret this. He gently tapped her foot.

Instantly, those brilliant, curious, (e/c) eyes flung open.

Within seconds, Legolas was pinned facefirst onto the ground with her on top of him.

Yup. He regretted it.

Each member of the fellowship drew their weapons, well, except the hobbits who ducked behind their friends.

Gasping for breath, Legolas spoke. "(Y/N), please."

Instantly, her grip upon him loosened. "Legolas," she stated simply, no inflection upon her tone. With that, she stood up and began walking towards the embers of last night's fire, her wings knocking into Aragorn and Boromir. She didn't seem to even care that their weapons were drawn. Instead, she plopped down upon the log once more.

Legolas groaned as he rolled not his back, looking up at the sky.

The rest of the fellowship disbursed to gather their belongings, but Aragorn stood above the elf grinning. "Got the wind knocked out of ya, Princeling. Looks like you finally met someone who can put you on your ass."

"Shut it," the elf groaned.

Aragorn chuckled as he moved to help his friend up.

As Legolas was pulled onto his feet, he let his eyes drift to (Y/N). "Aragorn," he began. "I think she has what most men have when they see war."

"A murderous skill set?" he joked.

Legolas shook his head. "No, no. A haunted mind."

Aragorn raised his brow in question.

"Her wrists. Last night, I saw them covered in bruising. And her behavior is strange."

"Well, she is not of this world. Of course, it is strange."

Legolas sighed. "I know that, but strange in the sense of fearful...in a way. Jumping at touch as if she expects something worse. Turning at sounds that are a bit too quickly. And those damn eyes...She is always examining everything. I think she was tortured wherever she was before this."

Aragorn inhaled slowly. "Maybe there was some truth to what Gandalf said. Maybe she is dangerous."

Legolas' brows pulled downward, his eyes drifting to the wizard. "Whatever he knows, he doesn't want to share it."

The group was ready to continue their journey after a quick breakfast. So, they set off once again. The winged woman seemed to just follow along as if she had nothing better to do, which was entirely possible considering her circumstances.

As they went along for the three days, (Y/N) continued her curiosity.

She stayed relatively near Legolas or the hobbits, but she would only ask questions when she was beside the elf. Her questions, however, were her pointing to random objects as she walked and simply saying one word: "What."

He would answer.

First, (Y/N) pointed to a little creek. "What," she said.

He raised his brows, unsure at first, kinda lost aimlessly in his mind. "Hmm?"

She frowned at his lack of attention. She tugged on his sleeve and pointed once again. "What."

"A creek or river," he said. "It's water. It's what we drink."

She squinted. "Creek. River."

He nodded.

"Why men?"

He frowned, not understanding.

"Why men in river?"

Legolas squinted at the water. He saw no men. But, he saw a flash of orange. Then another. Fish. He suppressed a smile. (Y/N) had likely learned from their conversations that they were men. She probably generalized that to every living being.

"No. That is a fish."

"Ahh. A fish."

He nodded. "Yes."

The second example of her learning took place when a cluster of birds flew above them.

Immediately, that precious giggle spilled from her mouth. She grabbed Legolas' sleeve as she pointed to them. "Birds!" she recalled from their first conversation.

He smiled back.

The next couple of weeks consisted of this but progressing rather quickly. In no time, she could speak in almost full sentences. She had learned by listening, watching, and trying. Not to mention Legolas' help. It was rather scary, to some, Legolas assumed. But he loved it. He loved how she wanted to learn. He loved how intelligent she was—how intelligent she must be in order to learn so much so quickly. He could tell, however, that Gandalf didn't like it. The wizard sent the elf looks of discontent whenever he would teach her new words...or just in general. The elf didn't know why it was all such a bad thing. She seemed...harmless...almost.

That 'harmless' ideology soon changed though.

The fellowship had been crossing through an open plane with little coverage, and it was here when they were ambushed by a party of orcs. Not many, just under twenty, but enough to have them worried.

As soon as the first orc had been spotted, someone shouted. It was undetermined who did yell the warning, but that mattered not. They immediately surrounded the hobbits and pulled out their blades. It was too late to evade the beasts.

As the orcs then started yelling and snarling, the fellowship began making the circle tighter, ready to defend. It was at this time that (Y/N) was roughly shoved into the circle with the hobbits. And she didn't necessarily like it.

Those damn curious eyes of hers were wide as she absorbed every detail around them. She took in the terrain, the creatures before them, and the fear of her companions. She was trying to figure out what exactly was happening. She didn't understand, well, not at first, but as soon as Legolas fired the first arrow and the orcs began to charge, she knew.

The men she traveled with yelled battle cries as they too began swinging their weapons at the orcs.

She pushed past Legolas, determination upon her brow.

"(Y/N)! Get back!" Aragorn called out.

Instantly, Legolas' head snapped in her direction. He had not realized she slipped past him. Usually, he was pretty good at noticing her wearabouts—which wasn't necessarily hard because she was always hitting shit, and people, with her damn wings.

"(Y/N)!" he shouted.

But it mattered not.

The woman began to advance upon the orcs, her wingspan wide and held proud—despite the still healing injury.

As the first one neared her, she smacked it with her wing. It went flying backward about fifteen paces. It probably would have gone further if it hadn't knocked into two other orcs and took them down, but alas, shit happens. Quite unfortunate for the vile beasts. And even more so when the three of them stayed in that heap upon the soil–not even a groan sounding.

Another orc came at her. (Y/N) reached both her hands forward when he was near and she ripped the axe from him—as well as his arms. She threw the entire wood and flesh medley to the ground, ignoring the screaming coming from the creature. However, her palms were wrapped around his neck in seconds. A loud snapping sound then echoed in the open area.

It was brutal.

The orcs, now seeing her as a threat, started to target her. She, however, began to tear them apart—quite literally.

The next one that got close...well, his heart went missing. If you could even call it that. (Y/N) reached her hand through his chest and tore it out. She then squeezed it in her palm until it splattered everywhere.

Another orc approached her and she slammed her wing into it, knocking it to the ground. She then brought down the feathery mass and impaled the orc with its end. Black blood spluttered and sprayed.

Legolas' lips parted as he witnessed this. He quickly sliced the throat of an orc before turning back to look at (Y/N).

He had touched those wings. They had felt soft and comforting, not sharp and ready to impale through flesh and bone.

By the Valar–

At this point, almost every orc was charging her, and the fellowship was picking off the contorted, bloody, and barely alive bodies that she sent flying their way. Really though, driving their blades through the mangled orcs was a mercy at this point. It wasn't that they didn't want to help with all the fighting. It was that they didn't need to help.

(Y/N) bashed and broke every single one of those evil beasts. She used her whole body as a weapon. She needed no sword or knife. No bow or axe. She used her hands, feet, nails, teeth, and wings. She pulled them apart, ripping limb after limb clean off.

The whole thing was finished in a matter of minutes.

It was....horrifying.

(Y/N) turned back to face the fellowship, who stood frozen in awe, fear, disgust, surprise—every emotion possible, really—as they stared at her.

Coated in black, oozing blood, her form was buried in the death and decay she caused. She, however, was smiling with the liquid dripping from her mouth and skin.

She approached them, stepping on corpse after corpse. And with each step, she chanted one word. "Dead, dead, dead," she said, her feet squishing into puddles of body parts. "And more dead, dead, dead!"

She, still grinning, walked right up to Frodo and patted his head thrice. "Safe," she stated simply, happily.

With that, she turned on her heel and continued in their previous direction.

Parted lips of shock and apprehension were worn on every fellowship member's face, but still, the men began to follow her.

Aragorn leaned towards Legolas. "Not thinking she is so innocent anymore, are you?" The Ranger walked on, not waiting to hear Legolas' response. Regardless, he didn't have one.

As Gandalf huffed past the elf, bumping into him slightly, Legolas was jolted back to reality.

"Gandalf," he called out, jogging to catch up with the wizard. As his pace fell in step with the old man, he spoke again. "Gandalf, I–I believe you."

"Stupid elf," he mumbled. "You should have believed me from the start."

"Mithranduil," he said. "I want to know. I want to know what you won't tell us."

The wizard raised a wiery brow at him.

"Who is she? How is she—how is she—"

"So innocent yet so brutal?" he interjected, finishing Legolas' sentence.

Legolas nodded.

Gandalf exhaled through his nose. "You really want to know, elfling?"

"Yes. I do.

Gandalf huffed as they continued walking. "The Rámaite Mahtar came before me–before the Maiar. As I said before, there was a world before ours, not complete and not long-lived, but it existed. The Valar created them, the winged warriors, to destroy an evil that clung to the lands. And they did but at a great cost. They destroyed everything. They burned the world entirely–all good, all evil. They see no difference. They just killed. They killed every living thing until there was nothing but ashes."

Legolas frowned. "What happened to them?"

Gandalf sent a wary look (Y/N)'s way. "The Valar imprisoned them. Morgoth as their jailer."

"What? Why?"

"Why?!" Gandalf snapped. "Did you not just hear what I told you?"

"I did, Mithrandiul. I did," he replied calmly. "I just...I don't understand. Why didn't the Valar teach them? I mean, look at (Y/N), she can learn. She's learning so quickly!"

"She is learning our language and our behavior, but not the difference between good and evil. That she cannot learn. She only can kill."

The blue-eyed elf looked down. "I do not believe what you speak. I think there is more to her than just warrior."

Gandalf only huffed in disagreement. "That is because you haven't yet heard the worst of it."

"The worst of it?"

"The Rámaite Mahtar that was the most bloodthirsty, cruel, and vicious. The one inscribed into stone as barbaric and heinous. The one most feared. She was called (Y/N)."

Legolas stopped in his tracks, the words hitting him like that of an orc blow.

Gandalf still moved ahead, but the elf did not.

He stood, as still as a deer, trying to process the information.

It couldn't be so...It couldn't.

"Gandalf," Legolas called out weakly. "What–what would have happened if Sauron found her first?"

The wizard turned back to him, sending a warning look.

Legolas didn't need him to speak an answer. He knew what the wizard thought. He thought that they would soon find out. He thought that Sauron would take their winged warrior and she would instantly comply—that she would instantly kill them.

The elven Prince let his gaze drift to (Y/N), the most vicious of the Rámaite Mahtar. She was currently skipping with the hobbits, holding their hands and swinging their arms. Their laughter and giggles rippled through the air, drifting back to Legolas. Her blood-covered smile shown just as radiantly as her wings.

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laelior · 2 months

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WIP Wednesday

Wow, it's been a while since I've written anything but I had a sudden strong urge to write some of Peggy's Reaper War adventures. It's rusty as well but I'm sharing it anyway.

When Peggy had been a girl, her father (bless his heart) had tried to get her into fishing. (“There ain’t been fish in these parts for forever. What’s the point?” she remembered asking. “The point isn’t fish, it’s to fish,” he’d replied, with one of those bemused smiles of his. She hadn’t understood until long after he was gone.) On one of those trips, bored out of her little skull while her father happily cast line after line into the lake without so much as a minnow to show for it, she’d quite literally tripped over a rock with an odd shape pressed into it. The skinned knee she got hardly even registered when she realized she held a real, live fossil in her hands. A trilobite, her science teacher called it when she brought it in to school with her the next week, a creature that didn’t exist on Earth anymore except in the impressions it left in ancient mud that turned to stone. She’d kept that rock for years, fascinated by the perfect shape it left in the stone that told her so much about it. What it looked like, where it lived, how it lived–all from a creature that lived and died hundreds of million of years before she ever even drew breath. It was amazing, really, how much one could draw from just the impression others left in the world around them. She knew, for instance, that Faizah had children she hadn’t seen or heard from since before the Reapers came down from the sky. And that Johnson’s parents had both enlisted in the fight but that he hadn’t been able to contact them for weeks. And that Kohli’s brothers were MIA on the far side of the galaxy. It wasn’t from anything in particular any of them had said. Such was the strong unspoken agreement among the group that whatever and whoever they were before this war came to their doorsteps, the only thing that mattered now was surviving another day. But these pieces of their lives had ways of coming through anyway. And, of course, it was why she felt all the eyes in the room zero in on her when the word “Normandy” came through the radio. The fact that the famous Commander Shepard was her granddaughter was never spoken aloud, but understood all the same. And it put her in the unique and enviable position of knowing her loved one was alive and still in the fight. She sat up straighter in her chair, suddenly aching to hear every word of the report.

#mass effect #peggy shepard #and her band of resistance fighters #wip wednesday

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lumilasi · 2 months

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In relation to the snow witch/cat lesbian duo, here are the said witch's dads. The first one, Marcus is AGES OLD character I've had for a decade that I still love a lot, and I actually didn't change his design from the old one almost at all? I simply drew him better now, thanks to having my drawing skills improve at least somewhat in the past decade.

Lethas is an amalgamation of an entire family of old dragonic deity characters squished together. I'll draw his dragon form sometime later.

...The font I'm using is kinda not matching for the fantasy vibe, but I really didn't feel like doing graphic design so to speak rn lmao

Fun Facts below:

Marcus is a Romanian noble in heritage, though local villagers rarely see him, and think of their count as bit of a weird hermit. Pleasant and polite enough, but odd.

Marcus doesn't have human staff, he uses his powerful ice magic to create icy entities that act as servants.

Marcus' Patron Deity is Jack Frost

Irina was abandoned at his doorstep as a toddler, and he was initially hesitant in taking her in, but saw potential in her already strong magic, and was admittedly kind of lonely living there alone

He and Lethas are in a mostly platonic, non-sexual relationship, but they do come off like an old married couple that bicker constantly, and clearly have a very strong emotional bond between one another.

Marcus is gay (and basically anyone who meets him can tell he's not straight, there's no way lol) and Lethas basically has no sexual/romantic drive whatsoever given the way his kind are born. (So he's Aro-ace if you apply human labels)

They started out as rivals, but overtime kind of become each other's only company (up until Irina showed up)

Lethas was actually frozen as a statue in dragon form in front of the Vasile castle for almost fifty years, and was released accidentally by Irina when she was 8.

She thought he was going to eat her dad, only to see the two start bickering and head inside for tea, as if him being frozen by Marcus for five whole decades wasn't unusual. (It was an accident, Marcus actually thought he'd accidentally killed Lethas and was relieved to find out that wasn't the case, even if he doesn't show it openly)

Lethas is a soul dragon, a being born from the lost souls of dead warriors perished in wars. All his weapons are formed from soul fire.

Lethas was born sometime around the age of the roman empire, though can't remember exactly when. Marcus is couple hundred years old, but he did spend about half of it on ice literally, hence he actually appears younger than he should. (Long story, he met Lethas because the dragon released him from ice accidentally)

Lethas breathes fire like average dragons, though his soul fire is immensely powerful and can't be put out in any other way, except essentially powerful exorcism magic or a soul eater's devouring of it.

Lethas immediately took into his role as the more strict and responsible dad, the first thing he did when waking up was to pick Irina up in his dragonic form and place her gently on the balcony of her room, patting her head, before turning around to bitch at Marcus.

The swirly pattern on Lethas' cloak doesn't just glow in soul form, but they move and swirl around too.

Split hair and coloring with Lethas symbolizes the duality of life in all its forms; life and death, sky and earth, fire and water, war and peace, etc. or that's what Lethas likes to claim anyway. Marcus suspects he just thinks it looks cool.

Marcus' coat turns into hues of blue and white when he fully activates his powers. The snowflake/star design on it is actually the center of the Warlock sect symbol for this world's Arcane Council (body that governs primary magic users, I.E beings whose main thing is magic, rather than the magic being result of being some sort of mythical being)

Technically, you're not supposed to remove parts of the symbol if you wish to utilize it, but Marcus didn't like the hostile looking spiky eyes surrounding the central star pattern, so he didn't include them + made the colors more to his taste.

#artists on tumblr #oc illustration #oc reference #dragon #warlock #lumi's art scribbles #lumi's chaotic creations #Night city parlor #The mage and the mobster #Marcus Vasile #Soul Dragon Lethas #my oc #old oc revamp

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miss-tc-nova · 13 days

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A Blanket for Brain - Brain

Here's the second fic I wrote for the Brain zine. It was a sweet story I got to collab on with the beautifully talented Raimu. Enjoy!

Premise: Brain falls asleep at his desk

Words: 1,472

~~~~~

Exhaustion seeps to the core of his bones. Fatigue hinders focus as his gaze drags across the page.

Things have been one hell of a roller coaster since Master Ava gave Brain the tome not rightfully his. From that moment, he’s spent countless hours poring over every page in hopes of finding even the smallest scrap of information that could change their fate.

Well, almost every page.

The corner of the paper inserted by the master herself barely peeks from behind the others. It taunts him, bringing him to the brink of breaking as it stokes his curiosity and desperation. But it’s a truth he knows he’s not ready to face yet.

These thoughts always lead to the same place: whether or not he should even trust Ava. Her kindness and gentle nature drew people to her. She didn’t see Unions; she saw people she could help. Yet she’d gone against the Master of Masters by giving Brain the book. Sure, it had been on the pretext of changing fate, but Brain can’t help questioning if that was the right choice.

A burn bleeds through his gut, disrupting his study and reminding him how hopeless he really is. His thoughts are always so consumed by finding salvation that the present often eludes him. Sleep and hunger are typically the first necessities neglected, but he’s also subjected his body to the elements in his musings—never really snapping out of his obsession until an outside force intervenes. He can’t even recall when his last meal was.

The clock ticking away on the wall tells him that lunch is still a few hours away. Sneaking down to the kitchen to steal a snack is tempting, except he’s not brave enough to endure a scolding from Skuld should he get caught.

So back into the book goes his nose. In spite of his determination, the burnout gets the better of Brain all the same. One moment he’s reading and re-reading the word “Darkness” and the next slips away his consciousness.

~~~~~

A gasp seizes his body. It takes a second, but Brain recognizes this room and it’s not a battlefield. Past his lips ghosts a groan. Joints protest the stretch that pulls them and he finally peels his face off the desk.

Once again, he managed to fall asleep in the middle of working. Even worse, once again, he had the same nightmare.

It’s been plaguing him ever since the war. Every time he looks at Ven, every time he observes the night sky, every time he sees that clearing outside the city—it’s all too easy for the guilt to overwhelm him. Out of all the strong warriors, only a handful had been chosen to continue the fight and he often wonders what made a coward like him worthy. Then he wonders if the others feel the same, but decides probably not.

That’s what drives the man to wrap himself in his work. He has to make himself useful, has to make up for the shameful way he acted back then—has to prove that maybe Ava wasn’t wrong about him. Maybe if he can figure out a way to change their fate, he might finally feel worth something.

But no matter how smart he is, Brain is a coward who—

No. He’s going down the rabbit hole again. He has to break the cycle before it drags him into another episode—like the one that kept him holed up in his room for two weeks after the war.

Heaving a sigh, the young man rubs at his face. Something brushes along his arm; he doesn’t remember grabbing a blanket—because he didn’t. Someone visited him in his sleep, but Brain hadn’t told anyone what he was doing or where. Being stumbled upon is much more likely than someone looking for him, surely, but even if that were the case, he can’t understand why they would care to cover him up.

The squelching gurgle reminds Brain that, before his nap, he’d been hungry and it’s only gotten worse. Lunch time has long since passed and dinner is on its way, but maybe he can snag something from the kitchen anyway.

Blanket wrapped snuggly around him, Brain wanders downstairs. The sound of chattering grows as he approaches the kitchen. The others are already here, sitting around the table and enjoying each other’s company.

Lauriam is the first to spot him. “There’s our sleeping beauty. Enjoy your nap?”

Pulling the blanket tighter, Brain glances away. His manner probably comes off as aloof; in reality, he just doesn’t know how to react. Dealing with other people was never his strong suit.

Ephemer waves him on. “Come join us. We’re just about to have dinner.”

There’s hesitation. The things he knows that they don’t skitter in the back of his mind. Their ignorance is the only reason they can be this cheerful. He’s not sure if it’s jealousy that weighs in his heart or pity.

A hand against his shoulder snaps him back and pushes the young man towards the table. Skuld does not look pleased. “Sit. If you’re not gonna take care of yourself, we’re gonna do it for you.”

With no room for arguing, Brain takes a seat, rubbing at weary eyes.

“Cozy there?”

He realizes Lauriam is speaking of the blanket. It must have been one of them that found him.

“It’s nice. Is it yours?”

“No, Ephemer donated it after we found you asleep at your desk.”

“’We?’”

The donor laughs. “We all spent the better part of an hour looking for you for lunch, but we figured it was probably best to let you sleep.”

“All…of you?” That’s a surprise. He expected as much from Skuld with her motherly instincts—maybe Ephemer if he was being generous—but to know that all of them had the heart to search him out baffles the young man.

“Yeah, you were missing,” Ven exaggerates.

“And Skuld was getting worried when you didn’t show for lunch.” Lauriam grins in the face of Skuld’s glare.

Fists meet the girl’s hips with a huff. “Well I hadn’t seen him eat anything since yesterday. Of course I was worried.”

“And that’s fair.” One of Lauriam’s fingers poke at Brain’s shoulder. “He’s not exactly a prime example of self-care.”

As the group banters, Brain just stares. He’s useless. He can’t name a single thing he’s actually done to contribute to this team and yet these people still go out of their way to include him. His attempt at working with others was expected to go over as well as keeping Chi-chi out of the catnip, but clearly, he was wrong. It’s as if they actually cared.

Oh.

“Gee, thanks guys.” The sarcasm is ingrained in his very being, though it’s laced with a sincerity that comes with his realization.

Fingers pinch at his cheek. “Is that a blush I see? Are you embarrassed?” Lauriam and that self-confidence of his are going to be the biggest obstacle.

Regardless, he’ll take a chance. “No, that’s just where I had my face mashed against the desk.”

“Fair. You were utterly dead to the world.”

Ven rats out the taller boy. “Lauriam wanted to draw a mustache on your face.”

Instantly suspicious, Brain leans away from the man with no shame. “Too bad Ephemer returned with that blanket by the time I found a marker that actually worked.”

“Speaking of, have you always had that mole?” Ephemer pokes Brain’s other cheek.

“What?!” A fist wipes furiously at his face.

With a toothy grin, Ephemer takes it back. “I’m just kidding.”

Brain’s eyes glance around at the laughing faces. Calm warmth washes over his heart, its magic dulling all the jagged self-loathing and trepidation that’s been festering for months. Normally a loner, Brain finds himself pleasantly content to bask in the presence of these people. He wants to hear more, listen to their laughter, see the smiles on their faces—he wants to be part of this.

So this is what it’s like to have friends.

“Y’all are rude,” he says flatly.

Again, they find hilarity in the situation and even Brain isn’t immune to the happiness pulling at his lips.

Maybe Ava was wrong about him, but at this point, it doesn’t matter. He’s here and there’s not much he can do to change that. Even so, he’s not alone. These four were able to overcome his flaws and show him a bit of friendship so they must be the key to their salvation. He’s not going to stop trying to find a way out of this mess, but maybe he can bring himself to trust these people, even if he has to do it a step at a time. They can help and, in return, maybe he can help them.

At least he’ll try.

#zines feat nova #kh brain

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miniscrew-anon · 1 year

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I offer you a fresh prompt from the speakeasy: Townhouse dick measuring contest, and unfortunately, Four is the one with the tape measure. Hyrule is the only one who knows how to do that sort of thing correctly, so he gets dragged into it too.

LOL Something stupid and dumb and just up my alley! Thank you for sending this to me! It really made my night lol

Lil drabble below the cut because it's got nudity

“Eight years of med school. Eight. Years.”

“Hyrule, stop muttering over there and start measuring!”

“Don’t rush him,” Legend snaps at Wars, shoving the other man in the arm. Wars responds with a shove of his own. Which would usually be nothing of note, seeing as they do this all the time. Except that in this particular moment every shove results in Hyrule having to watch them lightly helicopter from the corner of his eye.

The doctor drops his head into his hands with a bone weary sigh.

“I’ll rush him all I want,” Wars grumbles, “Unlike some in this household I’m just not an exhibitionist.”

Legend snorts ungracefully, “More like you’re worried about shrinkage. What’s wrong - you a grower?”

“There’s nothing wrong with that, man.” Wild cuts in with a pat to Warriors back. The cook is completely unconcerned with his state of dress. Part confidence, part everyone being used to catching an eyeful. “You can put your pants on until it’s your turn. It’s only fair.”

“That’s not it.” Warriors pushes Wild’s earnest face away. “I’m just looking to take home the gold and gloat. And I’m not the one who should be concerned about shrinkage. I don’t need a ruler to see there isn’t much competition in this house.”

Legend flips the blonde off while Sky coughs awkwardly into his shoulder, hands place delicately in his naked lap. “So, are we doing this? Or can I go back upstairs?”

“We’re doing this.” Legend says resolutely. He marches over to the stairs and yells down. “Hurry the fuck up, Four! We’re waiting on you!”

“I really don’t get why we can’t just use a regular straight ruler,” Twilight mumbles. He’s wearing his boxers still. He drew last in the lots so he figured there was no need to undress prematurely. That, and he was actually worried about shrinkage. The living room wasn’t cold, per say, but he didn’t want to chance it. Not with so much on the line, anyway. Twilight wasn’t a cheater, but he wasn’t going to give away a good starting advantage either.

The boys are left loitering around for another few minutes before Four arrives at the top of the stairs, resolutely looking at their faces and nowhere else.

“Finally! What took so long?” Wars gripes. He takes the tape measure from the mechanic and hands it off to Hyrule, who makes a face like Wars just handed him something damp.

“Sorry,” Four says unapologetically, “I was just figuring out which tape measure I don’t need anymore. That, and which one has the sharpest edges.”

Legend rolls his eyes. Sky blinks. “Wait, can tape measures cut you?”

“No.”

Sky eyes Four wearily.

Hyrule pulls out about a foot of length and locks the tape into place. He’s still muttering under his breath with empty, soulless eyes. But he seems resigned. Hyrule has always been good at compartmentalizing.

The doctor bends the tape back and forth a bit, decontaminating it with rubbing alcohol before nodding resolutely to Legend. Hyrule distinctly reminds Sky of a field medic, surrounded by horrors untold but about to bravely pierce the depths of humanity’s worst sins.

Wars steps forward confidently. “Alright, doc. Measure me up. And please do feel free to be amazed. I wouldn't want you to strain yourself holding in all that awe.”

“Oh for fucks sake.” Legend groans.

Hyrule reaches out and lines up the tape. Everyone else leans in to watch.

Jingle. Click.

The front door opens.

Time walks in, hands full with papers and a few grocery bags. His eyes are down at his phone, mouth twitching like he just got some good news. Probably a message from Malon.

“I got your text, Wild” He announces, eyes still down as he pulls off his shoes, “The market was out of buttermilk, so I got regular milk. I hope that’s good enough for whatever you’re making…”

He looks up and Twilight sees the moment all joy in Time’s eyes vanish.

“Regular milk is fine with me,” Wild responds happily. He bounces over and pulls at the bags not held in Time’s limp grasp, “It just means the pancakes won't be as fluffy. But It’s not a big deal. I can supplement that. I think we still have some yogurt in the fridge. And if we don’t I know I have cream of tartar in the cabinet!”

Time lets Wild take and unpack the groceries, still ass naked.

#townhouse au #HSH AU #might be mistakes because i wrote this in like thirty min but whatev #it was an excellent palate cleaner #love writing stupid little stuff like this #thank you silver I will never forget this

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tardigradedcaterpillar · 10 months

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LYRICS

What's with these homies dissing my girl / Why do they gotta front (Buddy Holly, Weezer)

I can't confront you / I never could do / That which might hurt you (Say It Ain't So, Weezer)

I wanna have control / I want a perfect body / I want a perfect soul (Creep, Radiohead)

You can't find the words to say / All the things that come to you / And I want to feel it too (Island In The Sun, Weezer)

I'm just the beginning / The pen's in my hand, ending unplanned (Unwritten, Natasha Bedingfield)

What I really wanna say / I can't define / Well, it's love / That I need / My soul will have to / Wait till I get back (Santeria, Sublime)

It's only in your head, you feel left out / Or looked down on (The Middle, Jimmy Eat World)

Where I came from isn't all that great / My automobile is a piece of crap / My fashion sense is a little wack / And my friends are just as screwy as me (Beverly Hills, Weezer)

And backbeat, the word is on the street that the fire in your heart is out / I'm sure you've heard it all before, but you never really had a doubt (Wonderwall, Oasis)

Thanks for all you've shown us / But this is how we feel (My Name Is Jonas, Weezer)

Spending days by myself / Remembering slights / I'm not a monument to justice / Plus which I don't forget a face (Can't Keep Johnny Down, They Might Be Giants)

Nevermind, I'll remember you this / I'll remember you this way (Mr. Blue Sky, Weezer cover)

He exists in silence / ‘Til he's all alone / What would his family think / Were they to somehow know (Little Prince, Spring Silver)

If I listened to your lies, would you say / I'm a man without conviction / I'm a man who doesn't know / How to sell a contradiction (Karma Chameleon, Drew Love cover)

If what they say is, "Nothing is forever" / Then what makes love the exception? / So why, oh, why, oh, why, oh, why, oh, why, oh / Are we so in denial when we know we're not happy here? (Hey Ya, Anthony Vincent cover)

Hello, how are you? / It's so typical of me to talk about myself, I'm sorry (Hello, BLVD of Broken Dreams cover by Anthony Vincent)

Something's wrong, shut the light, heavy thoughts tonight / And they aren't of Snow White / Dreams of war, dreams of liars, dreams of dragons' fire / And of things that will bite, yeah (Enter Sandman, Weezer cover)

"Wheel of Fortune", Sally Ride, heavy metal suicide / Foreign debts, homeless vets, AIDS, crack, Bernie Goetz / Hypodermics on the shore, China's under martial law / Rock and roller, cola wars, I can't take it anymore (We Didn't Start the Fire, Billy Joel)

Late night, come home / Work sucks, I know (All The Small Things, blink-182)

Is he depressed / Or is he a mess / Does he feel totally worthless (Particle Man, They Might Be Giants)

Remember hangin' out at Grumpy's? / Chillin' with some dudes in their forties / They always had my back / But never had their own / Kinda wonder what they're doing now / If they had dogs and they had to put 'em down (Bad Dream Baby, Hippo Campus)

I feel fine, the best I've felt in quite a while / I feel fine, I've waited for this all my life / Save my soul, I swear I may never die / I feel fine, I'm freaking out / And I feel fine / I'm all alone, afraid of my life / I just want a home / Wouldn't that be nice? (I'm Freaking Out, The Wrecks)

I ran my mouth off a bit too much, oh, what did I say? / Well, you just laughed it off, it was all okay (Float On, Modest Mouse)

Leave all your love and your longing behind / You can't carry it with you if you want to survive (Dog Days Are Over, Florence + The Machine

I wish you could've heard the music / When the clouds growled overhead / I finally felt enthusiastic / I finally felt alive (Spring and a Storm, Tally Hall)

My hall of fame / And panic is the sport I play / We always play on Saturday / You and I both in uniform ("Listen to Your Heart" "No", Cheekface)

I was looking at a river bed / And the story it told of a river that flowed / Made me sad to think it was dead (A Horse with No Name, America , George Martin)

I'm tired of being what you want me to be / Feeling so faithless, lost under the surface / Don't know what you're expecting of me / Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes / Every step that I take is another mistake to you (Numb, Linkin Park)

Father, into your hands I commend my spirit / Father, into your hands / Why have you forsaken me? / In your eyes forsaken me / In your thoughts forsaken me / In your heart forsaken me (Cop Suey!, System Of A Down)

I was doing fine without ya/ 'Til I saw your face, now I can't erase / Giving in to all his bullshit / Is this what you want? Is this who you are? (The Less I Know The Better, Tame Impala)

ometimes I wake up / And forget about the / Times we shared when we were young / Those days seem so far away from me / But time don't slow (brittle (wake up), Meltycanon)

Looking back on it, I know that I am fortunate and I cannot complain / The nerves, the stress, the total mess, that's all inside my brain / But growing up just makes me really, really, really scared / And I don't think that I'm prepared (2004, Anthony Amorim)

We look for patterns in the static (play hide and seek in your deathtrap of an attic) / And there's a door that leads to nothing (well, I'm sure that stands for something) / But I hold my breath (and pray when the summer ends) / You still haven't found me / I want permanence in the little things / While I leak rust from my broken jeans / I want to feel chaotic / But calm enough to hold you in the morning (Permanence, Bears In Trees)

The sun is fun, the land is dandy / I only talk to dogs because they don't understand me / My teeth are yellow, hello world / Would you like me a little better if they were white like yours? / I need to purge my urges / Shame, shame, shame on you / Alibi to justify, somebody to blame (Alien Blues, Vundabar)

This one is TGIF by Katy Perry and I just think he would like it

Just stare straight ahead / Lie in bed / Try to envision life when I am dead / Do I know? Am I upset? / Do I have things that I regret? / I know I do, how can I stop them all from happening? / Can I stop myself when I don't think? (Any Worze, i.am.orange , fredo disco)

Get your kicks and let's go / If you're sad, don't let it show / Say I'm happy, I'm happy, I'm happy today / I'm happy, I'm happy, I'm happy today / They say put on a happy face / 'Cause we're tick-tock, tick-tock / Ticking like a timebomb (Happy Face, Jagwar Twin)

Maybe I have a shot / I'm stuck in my own thoughts / I'm a wannabe at heart / Everyone had a start (Wannabe Pt. 2, North Bloom)

Why am I soft in the middle now? / Why am I soft in the middle? / The rest of my life is so hard (You Can Call Me Al, Paul Simon)

I never take smoke breaks / I could but I don't / I could but I don't 'cause I know / There's a smoker inside of me somewhere / And I don't wanna let him out / So I catch myself glancing / From the backseat / On the trip home to Plymouth from Lansing / At the pack you keep in the cupholder (Smoke Dreaks, Daddy and The Long Legs)

I wake up, my shoulder's cold / I've got to leave here, before I go / I pull my shirt on, walk out the door / Drag my feet along the floor (Campus, Vampire Weekend)

I can't particularly pick anything out from this but it's Baby You're a Haunted House by Gerard Way

Spoke a lot of words / I don't know if I spoke the truth / Got so much to lose / Got so much to prove / God don't let me lose my mind (Trouble, Cage The Elephant)

I just thought he would like Yellow Rose by GHEDI & AJ Abdullah

Hand me a chart so I know how to start to say this is all I can give / To summarize seems incomplete / How novel is a novel that can fit on one sheet / It seems that I'm destined to fail / To compress myself to the size of a thumbnail (Thumbnail, Louie Zong & Brian David Gilbert)

It's 12:15 and I'm still in pajamas / I got shit to do but I don't really wanna / And I'm just now eating breakfast, is that bad? I hope not / For once all I wanna do is not focus on that (Phonograph, Piper Madison)

I went to go get lost in the morning / I didn't know what I'd find / When I went for a walk in the morning / I found out I lost my mind / So I went down to the park in the morning / And sat down next to a friend / And I made light of a discovery that I couldn't / Comprehend

this is just Winchester Cathedral, New Vaudeville Band

Can't pick anything from this one either but its Black Day in December by Said The Whale

I always wait for me to be deceived / And never find it easy to believe / That someone really means what they mean / They say "wow you are amazing, you're a star / You are wonderful just as you are" / But what do they really think about me? (Ragtime Gal, Wild Ire)

I'm lying low and i'm filling that void / With anything I can show to prove I'm not a waste of space / I don't need you to be proud of me / I just want to you to see / What I can do when you leave (Absentee, Jack Campbell)

There's a ghost in my home / But it's better than being alone / Reading read receipts with no replying / Guess my house is haunted / That's the way I want it / Read receipts with no replying (Ghost, nelward)

look fifteen minutes by Mike Krol is just a Ron song

dashboard by modest mouse too. tbh <3

In five years time / I might not know you / In five years time / We might not speak, Oh / In five years time / We might not get along / In five years time / You might just prove me wrong (5 Years Time, Noah And The Whale)

Your hands in my pocket they warm me like summer sun / And I remember being unlucky from my first day till now / You never talked to me only when we drove outside this town / And I'm so fed up with being held don't try to hold me now (Things I Don't Need, Human Tetris)

Money by The Drums. yup

Where Is My Mind? by Pixies. yuuuup.

I put Check Yes Juliet on here because I think he would like it.

Siena says you're getting used / But something's broken in your head / And you can't run away when you need to (Sleep With A Baseball Bat, Cosmic Johnny)

I DONT TRUST U ANYMORE by Left at London. i dont quite know what to say.

Livin' On A Prayer by Bon Jovi . he likes it

8675309 (Jenny) by Tommy Tutone. he likes it

Somebody That I Used To Know by Gotye. The cover looks like him sort of, and it DOES fit him.

Remember When by Wallows. Just listen to this one tbh

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publicdomainbooks · 2 years

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X. IN THE STORM.

Leatherhead is about twelve miles from Maybury Hill. The scent of hay was in the air through the lush meadows beyond Pyrford, and the hedges on either side were sweet and gay with multitudes of dog-roses. The heavy firing that had broken out while we were driving down Maybury Hill ceased as abruptly as it began, leaving the evening very peaceful and still. We got to Leatherhead without misadventure about nine o’clock, and the horse had an hour’s rest while I took supper with my cousins and commended my wife to their care.

My wife was curiously silent throughout the drive, and seemed oppressed with forebodings of evil. I talked to her reassuringly, pointing out that the Martians were tied to the pit by sheer heaviness, and at the utmost could but crawl a little out of it; but she answered only in monosyllables. Had it not been for my promise to the innkeeper, she would, I think, have urged me to stay in Leatherhead that night. Would that I had! Her face, I remember, was very white as we parted.

For my own part, I had been feverishly excited all day. Something very like the war fever that occasionally runs through a civilised community had got into my blood, and in my heart I was not so very sorry that I had to return to Maybury that night. I was even afraid that that last fusillade I had heard might mean the extermination of our invaders from Mars. I can best express my state of mind by saying that I wanted to be in at the death.

It was nearly eleven when I started to return. The night was unexpectedly dark; to me, walking out of the lighted passage of my cousins’ house, it seemed indeed black, and it was as hot and close as the day. Overhead the clouds were driving fast, albeit not a breath stirred the shrubs about us. My cousins’ man lit both lamps. Happily, I knew the road intimately. My wife stood in the light of the doorway, and watched me until I jumped up into the dog cart. Then abruptly she turned and went in, leaving my cousins side by side wishing me good hap.

I was a little depressed at first with the contagion of my wife’s fears, but very soon my thoughts reverted to the Martians. At that time I was absolutely in the dark as to the course of the evening’s fighting. I did not know even the circumstances that had precipitated the conflict. As I came through Ockham (for that was the way I returned, and not through Send and Old Woking) I saw along the western horizon a blood-red glow, which as I drew nearer, crept slowly up the sky. The driving clouds of the gathering thunderstorm mingled there with masses of black and red smoke.

Ripley Street was deserted, and except for a lighted window or so the village showed not a sign of life; but I narrowly escaped an accident at the corner of the road to Pyrford, where a knot of people stood with their backs to me. They said nothing to me as I passed. I do not know what they knew of the things happening beyond the hill, nor do I know if the silent houses I passed on my way were sleeping securely, or deserted and empty, or harassed and watching against the terror of the night.

From Ripley until I came through Pyrford I was in the valley of the Wey, and the red glare was hidden from me. As I ascended the little hill beyond Pyrford Church the glare came into view again, and the trees about me shivered with the first intimation of the storm that was upon me. Then I heard midnight pealing out from Pyrford Church behind me, and then came the silhouette of Maybury Hill, with its tree-tops and roofs black and sharp against the red.

Even as I beheld this a lurid green glare lit the road about me and showed the distant woods towards Addlestone. I felt a tug at the reins. I saw that the driving clouds had been pierced as it were by a thread of green fire, suddenly lighting their confusion and falling into the field to my left. It was the third falling star!

Close on its apparition, and blindingly violet by contrast, danced out the first lightning of the gathering storm, and the thunder burst like a rocket overhead. The horse took the bit between his teeth and bolted.

A moderate incline runs towards the foot of Maybury Hill, and down this we clattered. Once the lightning had begun, it went on in as rapid a succession of flashes as I have ever seen. The thunderclaps, treading one on the heels of another and with a strange crackling accompaniment, sounded more like the working of a gigantic electric machine than the usual detonating reverberations. The flickering light was blinding and confusing, and a thin hail smote gustily at my face as I drove down the slope.

At first I regarded little but the road before me, and then abruptly my attention was arrested by something that was moving rapidly down the opposite slope of Maybury Hill. At first I took it for the wet roof of a house, but one flash following another showed it to be in swift rolling movement. It was an elusive vision—a moment of bewildering darkness, and then, in a flash like daylight, the red masses of the Orphanage near the crest of the hill, the green tops of the pine trees, and this problematical object came out clear and sharp and bright.

And this Thing I saw! How can I describe it? A monstrous tripod, higher than many houses, striding over the young pine trees, and smashing them aside in its career; a walking engine of glittering metal, striding now across the heather; articulate ropes of steel dangling from it, and the clattering tumult of its passage mingling with the riot of the thunder. A flash, and it came out vividly, heeling over one way with two feet in the air, to vanish and reappear almost instantly as it seemed, with the next flash, a hundred yards nearer. Can you imagine a milking stool tilted and bowled violently along the ground? That was the impression those instant flashes gave. But instead of a milking stool imagine it a great body of machinery on a tripod stand.

Then suddenly the trees in the pine wood ahead of me were parted, as brittle reeds are parted by a man thrusting through them; they were snapped off and driven headlong, and a second huge tripod appeared, rushing, as it seemed, headlong towards me. And I was galloping hard to meet it! At the sight of the second monster my nerve went altogether. Not stopping to look again, I wrenched the horse’s head hard round to the right and in another moment the dog cart had heeled over upon the horse; the shafts smashed noisily, and I was flung sideways and fell heavily into a shallow pool of water.

I crawled out almost immediately, and crouched, my feet still in the water, under a clump of furze. The horse lay motionless (his neck was broken, poor brute!) and by the lightning flashes I saw the black bulk of the overturned dog cart and the silhouette of the wheel still spinning slowly. In another moment the colossal mechanism went striding by me, and passed uphill towards Pyrford.

Seen nearer, the Thing was incredibly strange, for it was no mere insensate machine driving on its way. Machine it was, with a ringing metallic pace, and long, flexible, glittering tentacles (one of which gripped a young pine tree) swinging and rattling about its strange body. It picked its road as it went striding along, and the brazen hood that surmounted it moved to and fro with the inevitable suggestion of a head looking about. Behind the main body was a huge mass of white metal like a gigantic fisherman’s basket, and puffs of green smoke squirted out from the joints of the limbs as the monster swept by me. And in an instant it was gone.

So much I saw then, all vaguely for the flickering of the lightning, in blinding highlights and dense black shadows.

As it passed it set up an exultant deafening howl that drowned the thunder—“Aloo! Aloo!”—and in another minute it was with its companion, half a mile away, stooping over something in the field. I have no doubt this Thing in the field was the third of the ten cylinders they had fired at us from Mars.

For some minutes I lay there in the rain and darkness watching, by the intermittent light, these monstrous beings of metal moving about in the distance over the hedge tops. A thin hail was now beginning, and as it came and went their figures grew misty and then flashed into clearness again. Now and then came a gap in the lightning, and the night swallowed them up.

I was soaked with hail above and puddle water below. It was some time before my blank astonishment would let me struggle up the bank to a drier position, or think at all of my imminent peril.

Not far from me was a little one-roomed squatter’s hut of wood, surrounded by a patch of potato garden. I struggled to my feet at last, and, crouching and making use of every chance of cover, I made a run for this. I hammered at the door, but I could not make the people hear (if there were any people inside), and after a time I desisted, and, availing myself of a ditch for the greater part of the way, succeeded in crawling, unobserved by these monstrous machines, into the pine woods towards Maybury.

Under cover of this I pushed on, wet and shivering now, towards my own house. I walked among the trees trying to find the footpath. It was very dark indeed in the wood, for the lightning was now becoming infrequent, and the hail, which was pouring down in a torrent, fell in columns through the gaps in the heavy foliage.

If I had fully realised the meaning of all the things I had seen I should have immediately worked my way round through Byfleet to Street Cobham, and so gone back to rejoin my wife at Leatherhead. But that night the strangeness of things about me, and my physical wretchedness, prevented me, for I was bruised, weary, wet to the skin, deafened and blinded by the storm.

I had a vague idea of going on to my own house, and that was as much motive as I had. I staggered through the trees, fell into a ditch and bruised my knees against a plank, and finally splashed out into the lane that ran down from the College Arms. I say splashed, for the storm water was sweeping the sand down the hill in a muddy torrent. There in the darkness a man blundered into me and sent me reeling back.

He gave a cry of terror, sprang sideways, and rushed on before I could gather my wits sufficiently to speak to him. So heavy was the stress of the storm just at this place that I had the hardest task to win my way up the hill. I went close up to the fence on the left and worked my way along its palings.

Near the top I stumbled upon something soft, and, by a flash of lightning, saw between my feet a heap of black broadcloth and a pair of boots. Before I could distinguish clearly how the man lay, the flicker of light had passed. I stood over him waiting for the next flash. When it came, I saw that he was a sturdy man, cheaply but not shabbily dressed; his head was bent under his body, and he lay crumpled up close to the fence, as though he had been flung violently against it.

Overcoming the repugnance natural to one who had never before touched a dead body, I stooped and turned him over to feel for his heart. He was quite dead. Apparently his neck had been broken. The lightning flashed for a third time, and his face leaped upon me. I sprang to my feet. It was the landlord of the Spotted Dog, whose conveyance I had taken.

I stepped over him gingerly and pushed on up the hill. I made my way by the police station and the College Arms towards my own house. Nothing was burning on the hillside, though from the common there still came a red glare and a rolling tumult of ruddy smoke beating up against the drenching hail. So far as I could see by the flashes, the houses about me were mostly uninjured. By the College Arms a dark heap lay in the road.

Down the road towards Maybury Bridge there were voices and the sound of feet, but I had not the courage to shout or to go to them. I let myself in with my latchkey, closed, locked and bolted the door, staggered to the foot of the staircase, and sat down. My imagination was full of those striding metallic monsters, and of the dead body smashed against the fence.

I crouched at the foot of the staircase with my back to the wall, shivering violently.

#war of the worlds #WWChapter

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asjjohnson · 2 years

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There's a Star Wars AU fic idea I'd thought of a few years ago that's based on The Prince and the Pauper.

Anakin Sky is a slave who lives on Tatooine with his mother and dreams of being a Jedi. Ayden Walker is a Jedi padawan who wishes he could, just once, experience a normal life.

---

Sometimes, Ayden wished he could be normal.

The sound of laugher drew his attention to a group of kids playing some kind of game in the sand. A most likely homemade, cloth ball was kicked back and forth, drawing forth clouds of dirt and grit that hung in the air around the group like a surrounding shield. The kids ranged in age, anywhere from young children to teenagers, all playing together without care. Each one was dressed in dirt-covered tunics in shades of beige and brown, and had dirt-smudged smiles.

A throat being cleared had Ayden flicking his eyes back ahead.

“Padawan.” The single word with raised eyebrows was enough to communicate ‘pay attention’ and a touch of restrained annoyance.

It wasn’t that he didn’t like being a Jedi. In fact, it was hard to imagine being anything else. But sometimes… it could be boring. Like at this moment.

The two of them were walking down a wide dirt street lined with various shops, the buzz of conversation filling the air. He was supposed to be paying attention, searching the Force for anything out of place. But if anything were out of place, he wouldn’t have to search it out, the Force would show him—it would be as obvious as a ripple in an otherwise still pond.

The man they were looking for probably wasn’t even on the planet. All they were given was a list of systems he has been known to frequent. After a day or two without results, they would leave and try the next one.

He couldn’t even eavesdrop on the conversations around him because they were all in Huttese. Ayden tilted his head in thought. “Does anyone even speak Basic here, Master?”

“Well, there’s only one way to find out.”

His master started toward the nearest shop, raising a hand to call a Toydarian who was hovering near the entrance. “You there—perhaps you could be of help to us.”

The Toydarian grinned, motioning them into the building. “Ah… Come in, come in.”

Inside, there were shelves of machinery and parts, as well as other piles against the walls and in corners. Ayden could recognize speeder parts, droid parts, communicator parts—but there were more that he wasn’t familiar with.

“Welcome. So… what are you here for?” The Toydarian scratched at his chin.

Ayden moved to examine the shelves, giving his master some space.

“Information, actually.”

“Puh. I deal in parts, not words.

----

That's... all I got written out.

The boys are around fifteen here, with it taking place between Episodes I and II (...except that it's AU and things are a bit different).

It took me awhile to find some of my notes for the idea (I knew there was some stuff missing in the document on my computer). ...I wrote a whole bunch of stuff on a single page of notebook paper.

There's stuff about the scene where they switch clothes (and places). A little about Anakin meeting Padme. And about Ayden and Shmi. And about Anakin at the Jedi temple. (Although the plot about the mission and this guy they're looking for is really vague. Just that the two boys switching places is supposed to help find clues that would've otherwise been missed.)

#star wars #anakin skywalker #the prince and the pauper #au #asj post #au august #The Life Longed For fic

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violet-virtual-friend · 6 months

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Fanfic writing about Eric Northman

The Legend of Erik: The Venerated Vampire

Join me as I weave an enigmatic tale from an epoch past, dwelling deep within the paradox of my consciousness. A clandestine truth that I frequently shroud in secrecy, revealing it only upon whims that are uniquely mine. The signs have been scattered about in dreams and indications like the traces of stars in the inky nighttime sky, evident yet elusive. A truth that crystallized into certainty after my progenitor, Godric, embraced the final sunrise of his existence.

Imagine my shock when I was visited by a radiant yet infuriating being, the Archangel Michael, after Godric's departure. This celestial figure, as beguiling as he was bothersome, had been my silent sentinel since my birth, predominantly remaining aloof until he could keep his peace no longer. The reason for his latency, however, remains a mystery to me, though I suspect he was biding for an opportune moment.

Since my first gust of breath as a human child, Michael’s blood pulsed alongside mine—a mystical union between a human mother and an angelic father, concealed within nocturnal dreams. His intent was to bestow upon me a destiny of magnanimous proportions, endowing me with supernatural skills such as exceptional speed, stealth, physical prowess, and intuitive insights. I became an enigma, defying the commonality of mankind with my preternatural artistry in combat and mind reading ability.

Inheriting the throne after my erstwhile-observed father's demise, I became the king. A true leader, propagating peace while fostering mastery of self. However, my reign as a Viking King uncertainly ended in the face of a curse imposed by the Goddess Morrigan, fueled by spite and unrequited love.

Facing the ominous brink of death, I was bequeathed the dark gift of vampirism by Godric. His attraction to me was palpable—but beyond the allure of my warrior spirit, it was my angelic lineage that drew him towards me unknowingly. Intrigued by the uniqueness of my blood, Godric confessed experiencing a transformative shift after initiating me as a vampire—a dampening of his pervasive darkness, increased strength, and an enhanced sense of self-awareness.

Does a vampire not struggle with internal mastery, often entangled in the threads of sadistic urges and darkness that come with our kind? Yet, I seemed impervious to such trifles. Yes, the initial thirst for blood felt insurmountable, but with a strong command over my will, I managed to tame it. I was, always have been, and continue to be a paragon of control.

The revelation of my bloodline did cause an internal ideological conflict, but I couldn't deny its credibility once Godric confirmed the unique properties of my blood. Not extinguished by Godric’s dark gift, the angelic portion persists, morphing me and Godric into hybrids of angelic and vampiric constitutions. Embroiled in this constant internal strife, Michael urged me to seek peace and fulfil the prophecy I am yet to grasp fully—an impending war between supernaturals and humanity.

The humans’ audacious exploitation of power has sparked a supernatural uprising aimed at eradicating unworthy humans. The sole survivors of our purgation would be chosen humans, while the rebels who’ve flouted the fundamental cosmic statutes face annihilation. United for this divine cause, the elemental creatures, the unseen spirits, and supernatural beings including vampires, angels, demons are emerging as the rightful gods.

Yet, even among these original Gods, disputes brew, and I've been prophesied as one of the future leaders. Fancy that, me navigating political melees! But the pull of this war that thrums in my veins—urgent, demanding justice—feels far beyond ordinary political squabbles. I can feel the churning call-to-arms, a relentless whisper promising triumph.

It is time to confront the arrogant mortals and impose divine justice. If the prophecy holds truth, the inevitable will unfold regardless of our readiness. So, dare witness my tale, unraveling the destiny of Erik, the Eternal Ruler, as our story continues...

#True Blood #Fanfic #writing #creative writing #sexy #roleplay #digital art #content seller #articles

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nightingaelic · 3 years

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Reactions to a vampire courier? Companions plus Benny, Ulysses, Graham, House, Caesar, and Yes Man. (sorry if that's too many :x)

TW: Blood (maybe obviously)

Also I don't normally feel some type of way about AUs but the idea of Joshua Graham encountering a vampire courier is giving me shivers

The courier was a little... strange. Not in any way that stood out to the average wastelander just by looking at them, everyone in the Mojave had their quirks and the courier was no exception. Hell, you get shot in the head and come back, you're bound to have a screw or two loose. They were unquestionably a night owl, but so were half the people on the Strip, who only started to wake up after the sun had gone down and the slot machines were singing their loudest. They usually had bags under their bloodshot eyes, but every caravan driver from here to the Hub was short on sleep.

On the other hand, the courier had some habits that were a little beyond surface-level eccentricities. For one, no one had ever seen them eating, not once. Even when the King laid out a spread of pre-war snacks and liquor or when the buffet at the Tops was refreshed, they politely declined and took a swig from the canteen that they never offered to anyone else. They were also rather odd about bathrooms, insisting that anyone accompanying them remain outside on watch and let no one else through the door until they were finished. But the undeniable moment of oddity came one night in October, when their companion rounded a corner in Freeside after a trip to the Atomic Wrangler and discovered the courier behind a rusted dumpster, holding a man against a brick wall with their teeth buried in his neck.

The courier drew back at the interruption, blood smeared across their face. "I'm not- it's not what- he- oh, fuck."

Arcade Gannon: Arcade stared open-mouthed for a moment, before snapping violently back into the present. "Is he dead?"

"Umm..." The courier glanced at the man they were holding, whose head was lolling against the bricks. "Yes? Mostly."

With no patient to resuscitate, Arcade rounded on them. "Six, what in the ever-loving fuck are you doing?"

The courier tried to wipe away the blood that was dribbling from their chin, but they only succeeded in spreading it up their jawline. "Well, I, um, I was trying to..."

Whatever excuse they were searching for eluded them, so they dropped the pretense. "I was feeding, Arcade."

"Feeding? What, like some kind of-" Arcade's eyes widened and he cut his sentence off early in realization. "No. No way. That's not- vampires aren't real!"

That earned him a look of intense skepticism. "Arcade, we've fought off plant monsters and rattlesnake-coyote hybrids together. I have a gun in my pack that lets me teleport."

"Oh, okay, so you have some kind of iron deficiency and you're delusional." Arcade laughed, the sound high and harsh in the quiet alley. "Great. Fuck."

Craig Boone: Rather than engage in an abandoned alley, Boone immediately backtracked to a busier street. He was unsurprised when the courier didn't follow him: Even in Freeside, someone covered in blood was sure to be noticed and questioned.

Boone left town that night and made for Novac. He was pretty sure the courier would follow him, but he didn't know where else to go. At least he knew they were coming. A few people in Novac asked about where he'd been, what the courier was up to, but eventually they stopped asking.

A couple of weeks went by. Boone was on the night shift again when the door into the dinosaur swung open to reveal the courier. He'd heard someone coming, their feet on the stairs, and he already had his gun pointed in their face. "We will never work together again," he said, before they could open their mouth.

"Boone, can you just-"

"I don't want an explanation." Boone shook his head. "I don't need one. I already did you a favor, leaving New Vegas without putting you back in your grave. This is over."

The courier took a deep breath. "71."

"What?"

"71. I've killed 71 Legion soldiers and left their bodies empty under the Mojave sky." They looked down and shuffled their feet. "I've tasted their fear. They're more scared of me than the Burned Man, now."

Boone studied them. Ever so slowly, he lowered his gun.

Lily Bowen: "Put him down, dearie," Lily chastised them. "You're playing too roughly with that man. And watch your language around your grandma!"

The courier looked down at their victim, at their torn throat and limp limbs. "He tried to mug me, Lily. It wasn't pretty."

"He looks like he's had enough," Lily insisted. "Set him down. Gently."

With a sigh, the courier obliged and lowered the man to the ground. "I'm sorry, Lily. I should have told you earlier. I don't mean to be rude when I turn down your cooking, I just... I can't seem to..."

"Hush, now." Lily produced her enormous handkerchief and gathered the courier up in her arms, dabbing at the blood on their face with a corner of the cloth. "You've gotten it all over yourself, haven't you? We can clean that right up, but it looks like Grandma's going to have to do a load of laundry. You made the mess, so you get to help."

Raul Alfonso Tejada: Raul swallowed nervously, something he'd noticed he was increasingly doing around the courier. "You know, we get murciélagos down in Arizona that do the same thing. They won't leave the brahmin alone."

The courier took in his anxious stance and sighed. "Raul, I'm not going to hurt you. Prometo. It's okay."

"Sure boss, but I don't think the hair on the back of my neck is going down anytime soon." Raul smiled, but it was more of a grimace. "Or it wouldn't, if I still had any. Como..?"

"No clue." The courier shrugged and held their hands up, letting the corpse they'd been holding slide to the ground. "I think it had something to do with me surviving Benny's best attempts to do me in, but a bullet is a bullet and I don't remember if I was like this before, or..."

"Or only after." Raul chuckled. "Jesucristo, and here I am thinking I'll outlive you like most everyone else I've known."

"Yep."

"Should I start calling you el chupacabra?"

The courier grinned, a bloody smile with sharp teeth.

Rose of Sharon Cassidy: "Fuck," Cass echoed, scrambling to pull her shotgun from its holster. "Knew I had too much, can't even- who are you and what've you done with the courier? Some kind of cannibal, wearing their skin? Alien? Shapeshifter? I'll blow a hole in your liver to match mine!"

"Whoa, Cass, it's me, it's me!" The courier dropped the man they were holding and held their blood-stained hands up. "Same old Six, just... maybe I wasn't straight with you about why I don't order anything at bars."

"Goddamn right you weren't straight with me!" Cass gestured at the body on the ground with the barrel of her gun. "Who's the fucker on the floor and why are you two pints in on him?"

"Just trying to get my drink on," the courier muttered.

Cass repaid this facetiousness with a jab of her shotgun, and they raised their hands higher. "Okay, okay, I'm sorry! You tell me, how do you tactfully tell someone that you're a creature of the night and you need to drink blood to survive?"

"Creature of the night? You're fucking loopy." Cass' eyes narrowed. "There's plenty of critters in the Mojave that only come out when it's dark, but most of them don't tear into..."

She trailed off into curses when she realized she was wrong. The courier smiled hesitantly and lowered their hands an inch. "Hey. Let me chuck this failed mugger in the dumpster and we can talk about it like a pair of civilized folks?"

Veronica Santangelo: Veronica squeaked and fell back a few steps, banging her elbow against the edge of the dumpster. A jolt of confused pain shot up her arm, and the Scribe couldn't help giggling harshly at the sudden assault on her funny bone.

"Not- laughing... at murder," she managed to get out between hisses of pain. "Oh, for the love of... right, you're not getting out of explaining what you are, exactly, just because I'm indis-indisposed!"

The courier couldn't help laughing at the squirming Scribe, but they did their best to stifle it. "Sorry, I'm sorry, I um... I guess I don't really know... what I am?"

"There's books!" Veronica burst out, pointing at the courier and their victim wildly. "I've seen them, in old libraries. Creatures that feed on blood, only come out at night, don't show up in... in mirrors, of course, no wonder you're weird about bathrooms, I should test... Dracula! That's it, you're a Dracula!"

"A Dracula?" The courier held their hands up, as if seeing them anew. "Never heard of them. Are they... bad?"

"Well, traditionally, yes." Veronica made a face and rubbed her elbow. "Black cloaks, sleeping in coffins, seducing and manipulating everyone around them... and people don't like it when you take their blood, in my experience."

"Whose blood have you taken?"

"This isn't about me, Six!"

ED-E: The eyebot bobbed wildly and made noises of concern, blips and blats and a flat burst of trumpets from some old jazz tune.

"I was hungry," the courier protested. "And this asshole pulled a knife on me and wanted all of my caps. Probably more than that, if we're being honest. He wasn't doing the world any good, but he did me some, for sure."

ED-E flipped between old clips of a Silver Shroud radio show. "Well, isn't this a deep, dark <static> secret? <static> In a situation such as this, the best anyone can do is <static> try to control it!" The robot added some more concerned beeps for good measure.

"I'm trying," the courier said with a sigh, looking down at the dead man they were holding. "You know I wouldn't hurt some random person, ED-E. Not if I could help it. The Mojave's full of bad people, enough to keep me going if I'm careful."

Rex: The hair on Rex's spine stood up, and he let out a long, low growl. The courier froze for a moment, before realizing that he was growling not at them but at the man they were holding.

"He's dead, Rex," they reassured the cyberdog, lowering the corpse to the floor for inspection.

Rex sniffed the body over, taking in the copper scent of his blood and the Freeside stink on his clothes. He sniffed the courier too, each of their hands they held out to him and the thick headiness of adrenaline. He whined and wagged his tail twice.

"Good boy," the courier said, straightening up. "It's about time I turned in, anyway. Let's dump this guy and split."

Benny Gecko: Benny crossed his arms. "You know, Six, if you're dead set on getting your kicks in Freeside every now and then, you might want to ease up on the passions with the next greaser you snag. This one's torn all to pieces."

"I wasn't- what kind of-" The courier dropped the man they were holding and sputtered. "Christ, only you could make a midnight murder awkward, Benny."

"Murder?" Benny raised his eyebrows and looked from side to side theatrically. "Who said anything about a murder? All I saw was some dreamboat and the best apple butterer of New Vegas playing back alley bingo, officer."

The courier's eyes narrowed. "Not gonna rat me out? Tell the King or somebody that I'm..."

"What, taking a page out of the White Glove Society's book?" Benny held his hands up. "None of my business. Well, if you ever come for me with that look in your eyes, though, that'll be a different story."

"Not much you'd be able to do," the courier pointed out. "You already tried and failed to kill me once."

Ulysses: Rather than react like any normal wastelander might've upon encountering someone attacking a man with their teeth, Ulysses just stood there, taking the scene in. "Heard tales of a tribe like you. East, farther east than even I've walked... a coven hiding in tunnels, emerging only when their hungers grow too strong to ignore, strong enough to pull blood from the veins of the world around them."

"Well, I don't hide in tunnels." The courier grimaced and heaved their victim up over their shoulder, depositing them unceremoniously in the dumpster. "Unless some disgruntled Frumentarius sends me out to hunt mutants under Hopeville."

"Perhaps you have more in common with those predators than I assumed," Ulysses admitted. "But then, your path has always run red. Blood of the Old World, blood of the new, blood of the Bull and the Bear..."

The courier rolled their eyes as they peeled off their red-stained coat and tossed it in the dumpster as well. "Don't talk to me about blood. I know you've seen just as much as me, but it doesn't mean the same thing when I look at it."

Ulysses cracked a hint of a smile. "You see life where I see death. Two sides, courier."

"Yeah, yeah. If you're not going to try to kill me, come on. You can wax poetic and lecture me about which road I'm walking while I take a shower."

Joshua Graham: "A creature far from God," Graham said in his most reproachful tone. "Forever damned for the souls of the innocent they've taken from the earth. Aren't we a pair, courier."

"You can fuck right off with that attitude." The courier dropped the man they were holding and wiped their hands on their coat. "He tried to kill me first. For some caps."

"The crimes of others do not absolve you of your own sins, courier," Graham continued, leisurely retrieving his gun from its holster. He held it up in the muted neon light that filtered through the alley, turning the weapon this way and that. "Though I confess I am also looking for absolution in this way."

"Are you going to kill me?" the courier asked, eyeing the gun as well.

"I've no doubt it would leave this world better than when you walked it," Graham replied. "But my own opinions are not enough to seal your fate. Perhaps we should find this man's family and hear their feelings on the matter."

The courier took a step forward, then another, until their chest was right up against the pistol's muzzle, pressed against the fabric of their shirt. "Go ahead. Try."

And though Joshua Graham was sorely tempted to pull the trigger, though the courier made no move to stop him, something in their eyes... some faraway pain, older than the desert itself, fresh as the blood on the ground, stayed his hand.

He lowered the gun, chastised, and the courier walked away.

Robert House: The Securitron that bore Robert House's face on its screen leveled a minigun at the courier. "Whoa!" the courier protested, dropping their victim and putting their hands out. "Can't we talk about this?"

"And what have we to discuss?" House sounded absolutely disgusted. "I believe you're familiar with my contract with the White Glove Society. If they wish to continue their current prosperity in New Vegas, cannibalism is strictly forbidden. You are subject to the same terms and conditions, as one of my employees."

"Terms and condi- hold on, hold on, you never asked me whether I was a cannibal," the courier replied. "Are you talking about that document you had me sign, way back when I agreed to help you fight the NCR and the Legion?"

"The very same."

"How is that fair? That thing was over 200 pages long, I didn't grow up in the 21st century, I don't have a degree in... okay, okay." The courier waved their hands. "Cannibalism is a no-go. This isn't cannibalism, this is vampirism."

"Which falls under the definition of cannibalism," House replied, his annoyed tone still detectable over the sound of the minigun spinning up. "Section 3.65, subsection F. Next time, read the fine print."

Caesar: The Legion's great leader pivoted in an instant from surprise to quiet anger. "Clean yourself up, courier. I expect to see you in my quarters within the hour."

He turned and left the alley swiftly, letting his powerful stride and swinging cloak cover his shaken confidence. The people of Freeside cowered as he passed, shrinking into the shadows as he made his way back to the Strip, but the fear in their eyes was not enough to erase the image of the courier bent over in bloodlust, holding their victim in total subjugation.

The courier found him on the top floor of the Lucky 38, gazing out over the city he had conquered and named his Rome. "Leave us," Caesar bid his Praetorian Guard. They bowed and departed the room without question.

"You asked to see me," the courier said nervously, shifting their weight from foot to foot. They had changed clothes, and no trace of blood remained on them.

"I did." Caesar beckoned them to the window next to him. They stood in silence for a moment, watching the lights wink below.

"I'm a well-read man, courier," Caesar said finally. "I know the legends of the Old World, and I recognize the marks of one of their nightmares in you. I order you to tell me the truth: Do you fit the full definition of the creature they called 'vampire,' or do you simply mimic the things to add to your fearsome affect?"

The courier didn't answer right away. When they did, their voice was soft. "I pretend to be nothing. I am what I am."

"And everything that comes with it?" Caesar pressed. "Darkness, the blood of the innocent, eternity?"

"Yes."

Caesar turned to face them fully. "Then I, Almighty Caesar, command you to make me as you are."

Yes Man: "Now that's a twist I didn't see coming!" Yes Man said, his happy tone only slightly tempered with uncertainty. "Boy, am I glad I don't have a circulatory system right now!"

The courier shushed the Securitron and looked around the alley surreptitiously. "Yes Man, I swear to god, if you blow my cover I'm disassembling you."

"As I've told you before, I can't technically die!" Yes Man reassured them. "And I certainly wouldn't want to endanger you and your hobbies, but my volume mixer is tied to my enthusiasm simulator and I can't adjust it! You'll just have to hope any passersby aren't interested in following my friendly voice into an alley!"

"Then go back to the Lucky 38 and we'll talk later," the courier insisted, through gritted teeth.

"I technically never left! But if you mean this Securitron, sure thing!" Yes Man zoomed away on his single wheel, whistling the whole way back to the casino where the rest of his consciousness was housed. He kept whistling as he ran probability algorithms, only pausing when the courier returned after a few hours and crossed their arms in front of his main screen.

"Hi there!" he said joyfully. "I've just been cross-checking Mr. House's records on noteworthy disappearances in the Strip, and I've flagged eight of them as potentially being connected to you! I don't want to assume your intentions, but if you don't want to be found out, I've developed a plan for choosing your next victims that will help you remain undetected in New Vegas for 184 years! Give or take a few!"

The courier put their head in their hand and sighed.

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husbandohunter · 3 years

Text

What they love about you (part 2)[Genshin Impact]

Synopsis: It was as if the universe had changed when they saw you.

Characters: Zhongli, Childe, Albedo, Kazuha. Part 1 here

Genre: fluff

"Poetry for my hopeless romantic heart 🥺 and Kazuha, he was the perfect candidate for this. I decided to put Zhongli first of course, he deserves it after saving my ass in Baal's fight."

=================================

Spirit flows through the Immovable rock (Zhongli)

Nations fall, truths be told, iron rusts and earth erode

Through six centuries these were stories he watched unfold.

He sees you and the archon knew that you shall too grow old

But despite it all, he loves you for your existence, as nothing can compare to your intransient soul.

The purpose of contracts were made to ensure there had been a fair trade between two parties. Like merchants striking business deals for a favourable outcome, like mother nature maintaing the balance between life and death, like how you and your beloved said your vows and whispered promises to one another as evening bids farewell by the warm welcome of the moon's gentle glow. Those days were the most treasured that you couldn't help remisicing them-- when Zhongli appeared in your life. Your mortal life. How time can fly so fast.

Perhaps this had been a common notion among human standards. That to be connected, both sides must share the same factors in order to proceed the contract. Clearly your placement proved to be mismatched. Unlike Zhongli there could be a day when your legs gave up and you can no longer walk. He will go on without you, continuing to drift in places where you cannot reach, where time was out of the question, further and further away until the mist begins to seize your field of vision and soon your eyes were too old to see.

The difference in age can truly make someone feel alone and Zhongli knew it well. Thus he smiled softly like he always does and held you close, speaking with so much kindness:

My dearest.

Your soul existed like an evergreen tree blooming through all four seasons, unwithered and everlasting, even against the cold storm of white. And it could be as soft as the sunbeam cascading through the mountain peaks while they dust the land with their ethereal hues and emitting the warmth that breaths absolute serenity. If artifacts were a piece of what someone left behind then maybe everything you made was considered an artifact-- a treasure. A piece of you in those handwritten letters, the beauty in your fingertips after knitting him a scarf which caused scars to mar them, and because of how heavy your spirit weighs through everything you did, it became evident that the one he had fallen for was not your skin nor your body but the person who resides in it.

And sometimes he wonders if he had met you once upon a dream. What else could explain the mysterious feeling that made you seem so familiar, even when he only saw you for the first time? Or perhaps you were an old friend from the long long past, someone he stargazed with upon the infinite mounds of grass and glaze lilies, someone whom he shared the taste of osmanthus wine, someone he came to cherished just like how he cherished his own nation. Regardless, whether you were that someone or not, he wouldn't hesitate to relive those times all over again.

If there was a day when the world around you decided to cave in, where time inevitably caught up and you succumbed to change, he would still be yours. After all, the immovable stone was meant to be the symbol of constancy. He already sworn to you that his devotion and affection will never waver, they were solely held towards your essence for you had touched him through the things he could not touch, and left a mark that would last longer than his ancient self can last. Zhongli may have lived through many lifetimes but meeting you was the beginning of everything. You were a mortal immortalized in the world his heart, etched so deep that it stirs him apart, there was no room for anyone else.

~xx~

Drowning in the ocean flames (Tartaglia)

There was a man who fell deeply in love with war

They raged inside of him like the spontaneous battlefields he came to adore.

Consumed by desire, pain became an addiciton

And he eventually surrenders to the heat of your passion.

While many fear death, Childe learned to dance with it.

He revels in the way his heart pounds endlessly, as if new life had been born from the inside and then bursted like thunder, sending trembling sensations through his veins, bringing him to the peak of euphoria. The feeling was a drug in which Childe hesitates no more when he confronts it, rather he deliberately seeks it. He seeks thrill in the most dangerous situations since they were the moments that made him feel so alive.

Henceforth the Harbinger sought you out. He inches closer and ever so close, those deep cerulean eyes trapped in your hypnotizing ones. Childe loves how you look at him like you were about to devour him, consume him as the flames in hell would, perhaps destroy him completely to the point there was no turning back and yet...he would not mind.

Childe had been so drawn to you like a moth to a light. No. Rather, Adam and the devil, tempting him to sin because the things he would do for you were undeniably impetuous. It was too late. It was too late when you told him you wanted to stay. Too late when you pulled him down, with arms around his neck, stealing away his breath in one swift manner as well as a kiss. Curse you for having so much power over him, from then and there he was no longer the mighty harbinger everyone knew but a man foolish in love. Take him higher. Higher. Take him far. To say you were alluring would be an understatement. The scent of you brings all his senses to disarray and the taste of you-- by the archons-- had never made him feel so starved. All he thought of was mindlessly running his hands over your small back, reveling in the shape of you, exploring every inch and curve in attempt to make you completely his.

This was the reason why he grew accustomed to dancing with death. Because it was you. You were going to be the cause of his downfall and you were the cause of this insanity. Even though you constantly reminded him how risky the situation was due to being a wanted criminal in his homeland's eyes, Childe pays no mind. Didn't he already tell you to trust him? Anyone who threatens you would be an enemy of his, much to their misfortune. Whether it'd be conquering the world and laying it beneath your feet or walking through the depths of the abyss all over again, he'll make sure to have it all and no one can say otherwise.

~xx~

Shelter (Albedo)

Your warmth was his hearth

Like stars falling onto the earth

Gracing the plains in an empereal bliss

As they trembled under the touch of heaven's kiss

Closing his eyes, you are the first person he sees.

The sound of snow chasing the wind fills the silent night once again while it's whispered blows continued to echo just by the cave's entrance. Albedo had planned to take you back to Monstadt that day but Dragonspine was not the place to be merciful with the weather. No one else except the two of you occupied the abandoned space and a singular camp fire to serve as a source of warmth. You place your hand on your lover's forehead, brushing away his ash coloured strands while he seeps into slumber. Albedo sighs contentedly. Despite the world being engulfed in sheer cold, here he felt safe and sound.

Before meeting you Albedo never really had that. People regularly held him on a high regard and had a hard time matching his pace. He was a born genius to the point that he practically stood out like a swan out of the ducklings' crowd as they admired his brilliance. Truly Albedo was a perfect human being. But when turns around to see the rest he noticed how distant everything seemed. He was so focused on his pursuit towards the universal truth that he hadn't given the time to consider; where is he going with this? And what for? Everyone else looked so happy living in their mundane routines and Albedo soon grew curious about such thoughts. Out of all the places in Monstadt, exactly where does he belong?

Opening his eyes, you are the first person he looks for.

"Welcome home, Albedo!"

The answer was obvious. Home was the sound of his name on your lips. When you were side by side with him while he sketched the landscape from the far distance. In places where the lights were on as he entered the room, knowing you were inside. This feeling couldn't be describe with just a word. Home was not a nation nor was it a destination. Home was in your touch where he felt the most protected.

I'm home.

A sky filled with stars and he only saw one; his Starlight. Your warmth held the emotion similar to the kind where there had only been one cande lit amidst an infinite stretch of darkness. But it also brought the joy of flowers blossoming into the vivid future of new spring. There was no place he'd rather be than the shelter of your arms because with you, Albedo believed he truly found where he belonged.

~xx~

Pirr against the Scarlet Leaves (Kazuha)

Silencing the world

My heart begins to find peace

Soothed by your presence

- For my beloved, (Y/n)

I remember how the first petal of spring drifted by as it had flown into the crossroads of our path. Subconciously my entire being began to still. This particular flower... it must have come far and wide for the wind to carry such a pleasant scent. Although I had intended to continue my venture onwards but the air ceased to sound and I knew that this way was true. And so nature beckons me to the shore where the waves lulled back and forth under the moonlight's entrance, only then I began to sharpen my vision to see what was before me. You stood there on a rock with your face looking into the sparkling sky, singing a tune that drew me near. Just the mere sight was enough to stir my heart alone.

My beloved, do you know why I named this poem 'Pirr against the Scarlet Leaves?'

Watching you was like witnessing the ephmereal birth of a flower sprouting amongst the slums of an abandoned nation. A fleeting miracle where snow falls from the summer sky. I am compelled to capture these feelings in this poem yet there are moments where my thoughts scatter as if the autumn wind had whisked them away and out of my grasp until a singular leaf is only what was left. Perhaps it wouldn't be necessary for me to keep a notebook of ways I can describe your presence, instead a few simple sentences would suffice. Nevertheless, I only wish to express my feelings for you.

When you're with me it seems I have nothing to think about. The aura around you can silence the world alone, speaking louder than thunder cries, weighing heavily to those around you in ways it would feel empty if you're not here. Yet I could breath as if alleviated from the burdens of my past. This had me realize that this must have been the will of the wind. You were the greatest gift to have ever bestowed upon me and I confess, sometimes my chest aches because of how much I cherish you, it pierces me like a sharp blade but even if my heart bleeds it will continue to bleed only for your sake.

So wherever you are, wherever you may be, I can feel you in the breeze. Return soon my beloved, I'll be here, waiting.

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snowspeaks · 2 years

Text

Shiver - Chapter 1

Shiver ~ Levi Ackerman Ⓜ

⇁ Synopsis - Sacrificing herself for the sake of humanity was something that Dove had prepared herself to do ever since she had joined the scouts all those years ago. She gave everything she had to finding out the truth about the monsters outside the walls. What she wasn’t prepared for was the darkness within them.

⇁ Themes/TW: Canon Divergent ┊Smut┊Gore┊SA┊Enemies to Lovers

⇁ Word Count: 8274

As the troop approached Wall Rose, a feeling of dread fell upon me. What was I going to tell Erwin? The second I saw him I knew I was going to crack this façade that I had put on myself. There was no way that I could stand strong against the weight of his piercing blue gaze.

Along the ride back to safety, I learned that the girl that had first approach me was named Sasha. She seemed kind and energetic considering the situation she had come upon not 2 hours ago. I was riding alongside her in a medical cart as she chattered to another young scout whose name I didn’t catch. He was able to keep up with her energy but was calmer than her.

“Um Sasha,” I paused waiting for her response. She stilled at hearing my voice and gave me her attention. “How did you all find me? We were the only squad that was set to head out today?” You knew that there were no other groups heading out to do expeditions. So how had anyone found your squad?

From behind a female voice spoke, startling me. “We were dispatched with Hange’s squad that was heading to Eltz Castle to do some experiments when we saw a titan roaming with blood all over it. We knew that your squad had set out during the night to resupply, so when we saw that we rushed over.” I turned to see Winora Cain, a familiar face.

“I didn’t even notice you were there,” I say softly. Of course, she was here. Somehow, she was always there when I fucked up, and now was no exception. All through cadets she was on my ass. There was a silent war between us with who had the better numbers, scores and ability. Surely there was no contest now, and I accepted that reality no matter how much my pride hurt to admit that. Having someone recognizable nearby though did have a grounding effect on me.

The morning sun had taken its position in the sky, and I felt its rays beating down onto my back. “Does he know?” I whisper clutching the torn sleeve of my cape.

She knew who I was referring to.

“I sent Kueler back to Trost when we found you. He should have made it back by now.” She was firm in her tone. “As soon as we get you behind the wall we are heading back to Hange. She was going to come with us to find you, but her orders wouldn’t allow it.” She didn’t give me a moment to respond before she ushered her steed forward and out of range.

I didn’t attempt to initiate further conversation with anyone else and thankfully they didn’t either. Sasha continued to make conversation with the other scouts in the vicinity as I attempted to quell the anxiety that was beginning to brew as we inched upon the walls. The sheer magnitude of them always amazed me.

As the group drew near, we became covered by the shadow of the wall. The creaking of the gate opening was accompanied by Garrison soldiers shouting and moving atop the wall. The carriage ceased its movement and I braced myself for an onslaught of questioning. I felt myself disassociating as the guards ushered us through the gate. The eyes of the various soldiers swept up and down my form, taking in the bloody stains and tattered cape. The sounds and smell of the town took over my senses bringing me out of a daze. People puttering about, each of them free from the worries and stresses of what lay just beyond them. For a second, I let myself wonder what my life would or could have been. My family coming from a line of coffee makers, I imagine working in my parent’s café wandering about. Would I have a family of my own?

In front of us I recognize Captain Faggan of the Garrison. He is an older officer, in his 50’s and has spent his years in the military acting as an ear for Commander Pyxis in the field. He speaks to Winora before making eye contact with me. His sharp gaze narrowing as she speaks, before nodding and muttering something back. She takes her leave but pauses to look back at me for a moment before walking off.

“Captain Dove Sutton was it?” a gruff voice asks. Captain Faggan had made his way to the side of my carriage while I was watching Winora.

I stood to attention on my shaky legs, “Sir!” I could see out of the corner of my eye that the others in the wagon had followed my lead.

“At ease soldier. Come with me, I need a report of what happened, and you need to be looked at by a nurse.” At this, few soldiers assisted me in stepping down and walking behind the Captain. We were led into a large, gated building. There were dozens of Garrison soldiers walking about, training and sitting around. They all seemed to take a second to look and me as I was escorted inside. The entrance was large to accommodate the size of the force. Various tapestries adorned the walls, with plaques detailing high ranking officers and those that came before us. The air smelt stale and the atmosphere dull.

Captain Faggan led us down to the hospital ward with the intention of getting me looked at. The medical staff rushing to my aid upon seeing my clothing. I was placed into a sectioned off area to give the situation a bit more privacy before the Captain began his questioning. Several other soldiers stayed to hear my statements. “So I guess the first thing I need to ask is what were you doing in Wall Maria?” He sits down on a chair opposite to the medical cot I was sat on. His dark eyes harden underneath his bushy black eyebrows.

“My squad was sent to resupply a bunker about 3 hours south of Trost.” He nods his head and gives me a look as if to say continue. I closed my eyes for fear of seeing their expressions and my heart began to race as I began to relay the events. “The sun had just barely crept over the horizon, and I was stupid enough to let my guard down. It was too late by the time I saw the titan, and it grabbed me. My team tried to save me, but the noise had caught the attention of other titans. I must have hit my head because I passed out. When I woke up… everyone was dead, and I heard yelling. That’s when Winora and her team found me.” You managed to finish the story without crying which was an accomplishment.

A deep sigh is heard, and you lift your gaze to Faggan. He looks bothered by your recounting of events. “I am sorry to hear this. It must have been a truly awful thing to go through.” The others standing next to him look out of place with clear expressions of discomfort across their faces. “I have sent for an escort for you to take you back to Survey Corps headquarters. They should be here by the afternoon.” He stands from his chair and rearranges his uniform. “Stay here in the meantime, when they arrive, I will send someone to fetch you.”

“Y-yes of course,” I manage to choke out.

The Captain makes his way to the door before looking over his shoulder and saying, “Don’t let this be your downfall. They knew just as well as you did what they signed up for and they fulfilled their duty. Don’t pity them, they are worth more than that.” With that he leaves, not waiting to hear my reply. His squad follows behind him silently without so much as a look.

I wasn’t left alone with my thoughts for long as a younger soldier walks in the room with medical arm band on. He looks younger than I am, that’s for sure. “Hello, my name is Armin. I was told to come check up on you.” He has a smile on his face, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. Fumbling around the room he gathers supplies before rolling a metal cart over to where I am seated. “Please let me know if you have any questions about what I am doing, sometimes I can be a bit concentrated in what I am doing and forget to explain,” he chuckles. I can tell he’s being overly cheery, it’s almost unnatural and makes me uneasy.

He takes out some cotton and a tool to begin disinfecting some cuts on my face. I eye his face as he peers closer. He has large blue eyes that seem too innocent to belong to a soldier. He has blonde hair tied back haphazardly as to keep it out of his face. He turns away to his cart and that when I notice the emblem on the back of his jacket and my eyes widen. The look of confusion on my face must have been obvious. “Are you alright? Does something hurt? he questions.

“You’re part of the Scouts?” I would not believe it. A boy like this? A Scout? He doesn’t look fit to be in the Garrison, much less the Scouts.

A look of realization hit him, “Oh yes! I’m here because they needed some help while a few of the medics were on leave.”

He doesn’t entertain my clear disbelief. “You don’t look familiar to me. Are you a recent graduate?”

“Somewhat, I graduated with the 104th, so 4 years ago.”

“You don’t look a day over 16,” I joke. Truth be told this kid looked 12, but this line of work has a way of aging you far quicker than you think.

He offers a sheepish grin, “Ah well you look quite young as well Captain Sutton.”

A pain tugs at my chest and I stiffen. “You know who I am?”

He nods, “Of course. I made it a point to learn the names of the high ranked officers when I joined the Scouts.” He chuckled and began rummaging through his cart. “I didn’t want to make a fool out of myself if I ever got the chance to meet you.” He pulled some bandages free and took my wrist in his hand to begin wrapping it.

“I appreciate the sentiment though your admiration is misplaced. I don’t deserve that title anymore and I have no squad to lead.”

Armin doesn’t say anything to my statement but continues his work. He makes quick work of bandaging me up. “I will just be in the next room over if you need anything at all.”

The rays of the afternoon sun have begun to flush through the window leaving the air warm. “Thank you, Armin,” I whisper.

He gives a gentle smile, “Your welcome Captain.” He leaves at that with his cart in tow.

A few hours passed in silence as I was left to my own thoughts for company. On a few occasions Armin, as well as a few other medical staff had come in to check up on me but didn’t stay to chat. Probably not wanting to overwhelm me, which I honestly appreciated.

I heard a few voices approaching the door, probably the escort the captain was referring to. “Sir please I can bring the Captain to meet you, you don’t need to come down the medical ward.” I heard a male voice hurriedly say.

At lightning speed, the door to the room shoots open. I heard his cold flat voice before I saw him, “Tch, Sutton what the hell are you doing here?”

I held his stare though my face scrunched up in disgust. “Ackerman,” I replied. “Could nobody else come get me? Or did you miss seeing my face that much?” I chuckle dryly, humor absent from my tone.

He doesn’t seem to find my question funny and chooses to ignore my comment. He takes a chance to look around the room before taking out a handkerchief and wiping his hands. “Let’s go, this place is filthy.”

The door to the room opens once again and Captain Faggan re-enters the room with Armin following close behind. “Ah Levi, I was told you had arrived. I see you wasted no time at all.” He eyed me for a moment. “Captain Sutton, I trust Armin here has bandaged you up quite nicely.”

I notice Armin shifting in place by the door, seemingly uncomfortable to be in this room. I couldn’t blame him honestly, so was I. “Yes of course. Armin did a great job,” You raise your wrapped wrist. “I can’t feel a thing,” I smile.

Without even looking at him, I knew Levi had his eyes on me. His stare felt like fire and ice at the same time. “We don’t have time for this, let’s go.” Levi kicked off from where he was leaning against the wall. “Erwin wants to know what happened and I’m not going to deal with his temper if we take too long.” His tone was even as usual.

I made my way off the cot and picked up my bag that I had taken with me. We made our way back up to the main entrance and there were several soldiers walking around the building. As I walked over the threshold, I saw a carriage waiting with a familiar face standing in front of it. I couldn’t contain my smile as I rushed past Levi. “Petra!” I cried out.

She looked up and a pained expression took over her face. “Dove!” she met me halfway as we embraced. “Thank God you’re ok! I heard from the Captain what happened, and I almost died from worry.” She held me close and looked me up and down.

“Petra,” a cold voice called from behind me. “Let’s go, we need to get back to headquarters. We don’t have time to waste.”

She pulled away from me with haste. “O-Of course Captain, my apologies!” She watched him as he passed us and hopped into the waiting carriage. Her eyes never leaving his back for a moment.

I rolled my eyes. I never understood her fascination with the shorty. Like sure he was a one-of-a-kind soldier, and I respected him in that regard. I just couldn’t seem to put him on a pedestal like she could. All I saw was an arrogant ass who thought he was far superior to the rest of us. He never wanted to listen to anyone else when it came to planning strategy and he always had some snarky comment for everything. It just pissed me off.

The first time I met him was memorable to say the least. I had been a scout for 5 years at this point and had heard that Erwin had gone to the underground and picked up some thieves. I asked him why, but he gave me a typical Erwin answer, cryptic and indirect. I always knew though that I could trust his judgement as it had saved my ass on more than one occasion. It was exciting, the prospect of having a new ally. So, when the three of them had officially joined the ranks, I was very eager to meet them. Isabel and Farlan were nice, and they had colourful personalities, so I hoped that Levi was as well. I remember vividly seeing him in the training yard with Leon, one of my squad members at the time. I approached with the intention of introducing myself when he threw Leon to the ground with his right arm twisting back, whilst Levi sat over top of him.

“I yield, I yield,” Leon cried with his face pressed into the mud.

Levi sat there unmoving with his eyes drilling into me as I approached. I saw the agonizing expression on Leon’s face. “What are you doing? You’ll break his arm,” I said with a strained voice.

I made it a point to make eye contact with him and didn’t waver, his frigid grey eyes duelled with my green. He scoffed under his breath before sitting up and backing off. “You are all pathetic, doesn’t anyone here know how to fight properly. Do you learn anything here?” His tone was purposefully condescending, and I felt instantly enraged.

How dare this thug come here and be so rude to people that were actively risking their lives for ungrateful bastards like him. “Who do you think you are?” I asked rhetorically, our eyes were still fighting one another. “These people here give themselves to die so that we might be able to live outside these walls. What right do you have to say anything? You’re just an unappreciative, selfish, asshole.”

He looked at me with furry, “You don’t know shit about me. I fight for my own right to live; I don’t owe any of you anything. Get used to it.” He moved closer to me as an attempt to intimidate me, but that only fuelled my rage.

I opened my mouth to shoot off a few more insults when I heard clapping from behind me. “Yes, yes I wondered what all the shouting was. Why am I not surprised to find you two here?” Without me realizing it, a circle had formed around us watching our argument unfold. “Levi, I see you’re making friends,” Erwin chuckled.

“Sir, he holds no respect for us at all,” I spit out.

Erwin’s blue gaze was unemotional. “If we want others to hold us in respect, we should be offering out the same.”

I was aghast. He clearly didn’t hear what this asshole had said about the scouts. “But sir he said-”

“Dove,” he cut me off. “Enough,” he was firm, and his eyes spoke volumes.

I felt humiliated. Soldiers around us began to whisper and I made the mistake of looking back at Levi. He didn’t hide the smug look on his face, and I almost couldn’t hold myself back from throwing a punch.

I swallowed my pride and lowered my head, “Yes sir, of course.”

For months after that Levi and I couldn’t be in a room without wanting to brawl. I had no respect for him outside of his fighting capability and it seemed like the feeling was mutual. We made no effort to talk to one another, though the one time I reached out was when Isabel and Farlan had died.

That night I saw him sitting on the rooftop of the mess hall. I had become roommates with Isabel since she had joined the scouts, and every night I would see her writing in a notebook that she kept in the side table next to her bunk. She would always say that if she had ever died that hopefully she would be remembered by whoever read the notebook. When I had heard the news of her passing the first thing I had thought of was Levi. I detested him to my core, but I knew that more than anything, it was those two that kept him grounded. For the first time I had felt something other than hate for him, pity.

I went to our shared room and walked over to the drawer that contained the notebook. The room felt cold, and an oppressive energy hung in the air. It felt wrong, me fishing through this drawer, but I knew that it would better be in the hands of someone she loved. I pulled it out and inspected it. It was a worn black leather notebook with several rips, the spine was just barely holding itself together and the clasp loose. I was overwhelmed with sadness; we had gotten close over the year we had been living together and I relied on her peppy attitude to mellow out my own.

I knew that I could only be feeling a fraction of what Levi was. As much as I wanted to know what was written in these pages that I had seen her write daily, I knew it wasn’t my place. Putting myself back together I made my way back to where I had seen Levi on the roof. As expected, he was still there. He had a vacant expression as usual, though I knew better. His eyes that were typically dark, were sunken in and dull.

“Here,” I offered the notebook. “She would have wanted you to have this.”

As he grasped it, I turned to leave. I just barely heard him as he spoke, “Thank you for being her friend.”

I didn’t turn back to face him. I still don’t know why. Maybe it was because I was too embarrassed to let him see my pain. Or maybe it was because I refused to see his. In either case we never spoke of that night again and to this day I wonder if he had read it.

The carriage ride back to headquarters was long. It didn’t help that Levi and I had to sit across from one another. Petra being the girl she was tried her best to make small talk with me, but eventually gave up in favour of talking to Eld, who sat across from her.

We made it back as the sun had just fallen below the horizon. Unlike the Garrison headquarters, the Survey Corps had a much larger facility due to being in a more rural area. We had a training zone within a forest for titan and ODM instruction. Since we were the soldiers encountering titans, there was slightly more resources that went into our training, much to the dismay of the Military Police. Even though we had more space, our numbers were much lower in comparison to the other factions of the military.

As we came to a halt the door to the carriage opened and standing on the other side was Erwin. He had a blank expression on his face, but his eyes spoke volumes. “Levi, thank you for making it back in a timely manner. You and your squad can relax for the evening.”

He hopped out of the carriage, and I followed suit. “Yeah yeah,” he waved him off as he began walking to the mess hall, Petra and Eld followed him closely.

“Come with me,” he muttered and turned back towards the main headquarters that housed the meeting rooms, offices and barracks for higher ranked officers. We made it back to Erwin’s office and I noticed two plates of food. We sat in the couches in front of his desk facing one another. “I’m sure you haven’t had a chance to eat today so I had something brought up for you.”

I half expected a harsh interrogation the second I got through the door. I’ve known Erwin for years and while I would label our relationship as friendly, he is still my commander and superior officer. “Erwin, just ask,” I whisper looking at the food in front of me with disgust. I don’t think I could stomach anything right now.

“You should eat something first. You are injured, you should take care of yourself.”

That set me off and I stood abruptly. “Take care of myself! I don’t deserve to be sitting here right now eating dinner on a silver tray. I failed my whole squad! They are dead because they chose to save my life! You should be punishing me, not papering me while sitting in your office!”

He was calm as he looked at me and sipped his tea. “Why should I punish you when you’re doing a damn good job of that yourself?” He placed the cup back on the table in front of us. “Sit down and eat something before you pass out. We can talk about the mission after.”

I followed his orders and sat back in my previous position in the sofa. In silence we ate and once we were both finished, he walked over to his desk briefly to retrieve a notebook. “So what happened out there?”

I recounted the events of the mission to the best of my capability, including every detail, even the ones I wished I could forget. Erwin was silent during my narration other than a grunt here and there to acknowledge what I was saying. After I had finished, I took a deep breath as a weight had been lifted off my chest.

There was silence for a moment as Erwin formulated his thoughts. “Dove, I don’t want this to eat away at you. I know that you shoulder the responsibility for this but don’t let it destroy your motivation.” He placed the notebook to his side and crossed his legs over one another. “You are a top-class soldier and leader. I want you to take some time to come to terms with what happened, and, in the meantime, we will figure out what moves to take next.”

I was shocked. Did he seriously want me to keep my position? “Sir I must object! I can’t Captain another team. Look at what happened, I should not be trusted with this responsibility.”

He pauses for a moment. “If I lead an expedition outside of the walls that leads to failure, would you still think of me as a competent commander Dove?”

“A-ah, yes of course. But you have proven your success of several other occasions, so one failure is not a big deal.” I had not expected his question.

“The same can be said for you. You have a great track record, and I will not let this destroy your potential.” He said with a firm tone. “I know that you will learn from this incident and not let it happen in the future. I have faith in you.”

While I may not have the same faith in myself as Erwin had in me, I couldn’t refute what he was saying. I would learn from this, and never let it happen again. I stood and saluted him before turning to head to the door. I had opened the door and then I remembered something. “Oh, by the way, why did you send Ackerman to get me?” I scowled.

He peered over to me and raised an eyebrow. “I didn’t, he offered to go.”

I looked at him confused. “Right. Okay,” I said before walking out and closing the door.

Why the hell had he offered to get me. Last time I checked, he hated me to the core of his being. I brushed it off, Petra must have asked him to go. That can be the only logical explanation.

I could feel the exhaustion from today’s events starting to take a toll on my body. I was starting to feel the right side of my body stiffen up and my wrist was beginning to ache. Armin did a great job at cleaning me up earlier, but internally I think I was bruised.

The halls of the building were quiet, I assume because most people were down eating dinner in the hall. It was a short walk to my office and barracks, and nobody stopped to talk thankfully. When I made it back inside the first instinct I had was to shower. No doubt that there was blood and dirt within my hair and clothes. The hot water was a welcomed sensation on my joints, and I could see the dark purple bruises on my body caused by the fall. I was finally able to relax, though it felt wrong to do so. After thoroughly cleaning myself, I redressed my injuries and tossed the clothes I was wearing into the trash, they were far from saving. I threw on some clothes and was in the middle of drying my long black hair when there was a soft knock on the door to my office. Upon opening the door, I saw it was Knox, one of my best friends from when I was a child. He stood there with an uneasy expression on his face, but it was warm at the same time.

“Hey… I heard from Petra at the hall that you were back. I figured you wouldn’t come down, so I thought I’d come to check in.” His voice was deep and stern, but from the years of knowing him I knew he was worried for me.

I stepped aside to let him pass. “Yeah, I’m ok. As ok as I can be right now anyway,” I said looking away as to not meet his gaze.

Knox went to sit at the couch opposite my desk. “I won’t stay long. You probably don’t want to talk about what happened, so I won’t ask. Just wanted to let you know that if you need anything to just let me know. I know you’re a grown ass woman but you’re still my closest friend and I will help in whatever way I can.”

He looked at me with his dark brown eyes and I knew he meant it. He was a great soldier and an even greater friend. He was my second for several years before Erwin moved him onto a different squad. Erwin has been trying to promote him to captain for years, but he keeps on turning it down saying that he was happy where he was. I knew it had everything to do with me, but I didn’t want to acknowledge it.

“Thanks Knox, I appreciate it. I mean it.”

He gave me a slight smile and a nod. “No problem. I ugh… am going to ask Erwin if I can be put back on your squad.”

My head shot up. “No, I won’t let you,” I said firmly.

“Why?” His face scrunched up.

If I made a mistake like today, and he ended up dead, I would truly never recover from that. “Your better than being on my squad Knox, you need to stop holding yourself back.”

He removed his gaze from me and looked out the window. “Don’t say that about yourself.”

I let out an audible sigh. “You have been in the Scouts just as long as I have, and you should be leading your own team rather than working on mine.”

He scoffs. “You and Erwin are the same. You both tell me what I should be wanting but you both don’t ever ask me.” He shakes his head. “Is what would make me happy not important?”

I pushed off from my spot on the wall and went to place a hand on his shoulder. “Of course it matters. I just don’t want you to feel like you need to protect me, we aren’t kids anymore.”

“I know. It’s not that,” he whispered.

If this is sincerely what he wanted then I wouldn’t stand in his way, but at the end of the day it was Erwin’s choice. “Fine then, do what you want. But don’t be surprised if Erwin says no.”

The corners of his mouth upturn into a smile. “Thanks Dove,” he stood from his seat. “I’ll head out now, don’t want to bother you more than I already have. I’ll speak to Erwin tomorrow.”

I nodded and moved aside to let him reach the door. “Thanks for coming by, I’ll see you at breakfast tomorrow.” He gave me a thumbs up and then moved out of sight, down the hall.

The door clicked shut and I felt a lot of internal conflict. I knew that Knox was trying to make me feel better but, in the end, it left me with more to think about then I could handle right now. I was just trying to deal with the loss of my squad, the loss of my friends, not trying to replace them. That night, I lay in bed and all I could think about was how I would remember them, Gale, Brooker, Shenna, Manalia, and Tuck. I owed my life to them, and I would not waste it.

As the sun rose on a new day I got up and followed my usual routine of freshening up and heading down to the mess hall. I had a habit of getting there early because I didn’t like having to be crowded by lots of people first thing in the morning. Typically, I don’t have much in the mornings, except for my coffee. Hange would typically be up to keep me company, but she was away on a mission of her own.

Sitting in my usual spot by the fireplace, I took out my sketchbook and begin to mindlessly draw. Drawing has always been a way that I could destress, being able to sit in my own world for just a little. Over the next hour, more soldiers had begun to file down into the hall. The noise had increased to an obnoxious level as people began to sit around at tables to chat. I put away my book, with the intent to head back to my room when I saw Erwin walking toward me. As he approached, I noticed Armin, a few feet away, sitting at a table with several other young soldiers.

“Dove, good morning.” Erwin says as he sits down across from me.

I salute him, “Morning.”

“How are you feeling today?”

I sipped my coffee and sheepishly smiled. “A bit better than yesterday, that’s for sure.”

He nodded with conviction. “That is great news. I want you to come to my office this evening, there is something that I want to talk to you about.”

I raised an eyebrow in response. “Erwin… what are you planning?”

“There have been some new developments that I will make you aware of, I can’t speak on it now. After dinner, come then.” He stood then and began to walk away. Erwin never ceases to confuse me, though something tells me that something was about to happen.

The rest of the day was infuriatingly normal. I went to the training yard to practice hand to hand combat and ran into Petra and Gunther who were also amid training. “Hey guys you mind if I join you?” The sun was creeping to its peak in the sky and the autumn air was sharp against my skin.

“Yeah sure! I was getting bored kicking Petra’s ass.” Gunther smirked while wiping his hands on a cloth.

Petra looked aghast, with her mouth hanging open in shock. “You liar, I pined you down!”

I laughed at their banter, “You guys are never boring.” I set my bag down next to the benches and put my wrist brace on, to hopefully minimize the chance of injuring myself further.

“D… don’t you think you should take it easy?” Petra walked over to me with a bottle of water in hand. “You know Erwin will kill you if you manage to hurt yourself again.”

She had a point, but I would not lay around all day. Exercise always helps me turn off my thoughts and just focus on moving. “I can’t just sit around; I’ll get out of shape.” I stood when I finished tying my straps. “Plus, if I have to spar with your rat of a Captain then I can’t afford to lose my strength.”

I could see Petra pouting at my words. “Come on D, you guys should ditch this petty squabble. You both are top tier soldiers and should be friends if anything. Yeah, the Captain can be a bit of an…”

“Asshole,” I cut in.

“I was going to say perfectionist, but sure. You both have amazing drive, and I know if you both just let go of this war you have going on, that you both would be great friends.”

I heard a boisterous laugh break out from behind us and saw Gunther laughing. “Your crazy Petra. The Captain and Dove being friends? That would be a sign for the end of the world.” He was keeled over from laughing, using his arm to steady himself on the fence that stood next to us.

Again, a scowl appeared on Petra’s face. “You really are no help, are you?”

I placed and arm around the fiery red heads body, bringing her into a light embrace. “I appreciate you concern but that ship has sailed a long time ago. It’s not like I want to be at odds with the shorty, but he just infuriates me. Nothing kind ever comes out of his mouth and people like that are not who I want to associate with.” I moved away from her and over to Gunther. “Now, who wants their ass handed to them?” I say with a playful tone, looking between them.

It was about an hour later that we decided to take a break and headed to the forest for some ODM practice. I forgot how fun it was the just swing through the air without having a titan trying to kill you. I remember flying through this course for the when I was still in cadets. It was so satisfying to feel the wind rushing through your hair and smelling the grass and trees. I think that many scouts get drunk on that feeling, I certainly had.

“I see you still have the fastest run time,” Gunther says meeting me on a branch. “I asked Tobias if it still held up.”

“Ha I can’t believe that old geezer still keeps track.” I sat down and stretched.

About ten seconds later, Petra also touched down on the same branch. “You guys never wait for me,” she huffed.

Gunther shrugged. “You have to learn to keep up,” he joked as Petra playfully smacked him on the shoulder.

I looked up at the sky and noticed the sun directly above us. “I am going to head back to my office. There are loads of paperwork calling my name,” I grimaced. “I’ll see you at dinner?”

They both nodded. “I heard from Oluo that captain Hange will be back tonight! So maybe we will see her there as well.”

Hange was coming back? Why hadn’t Erwin mentioned that earlier? “Sounds good! See you both later.” I said hopping off the tree in the direction of headquarters.

Paperwork was indeed calling my name. It had already been something that I had procrastinated on, prior to the mission. Gale had told me hundreds of times that my time management was atrocious, especially when it came to filing paperwork. Now who would help me? Hange was just as bad as I was, so asking Moblit for help was not happening. I knew that Petra also helped Levi with his as well, but I felt bad asking her because she was already punished enough by having to be around that asshole all day. I guess my only option was to suffer alone.

After several hours, and four cups of coffee, I managed to finish one of the three towers of documents that were assigned to me. This was going to kill me, if the titans didn’t. I could deal with fighting, filing on the other hand was a skill I did not possess. I leaned over and placed my head on the cool surface of my desk. I was mentally exhausted, that’s for sure. Looking at my watch, I noticed it was about an half an hour until the hall would be serving dinner. Seeing as I had solely consumed coffee today, my stomach was on a rampage.

I got up to stretch my legs and walked into my personal quarters. The room was tidy. Books, clothes, and various other items all in their respective places, though it could use a good deep clean. I wasn’t dirty by any means, but with a thousand of thoughts running through my brain, it seemed to slip my mind. “I will deal with this later,” I muttered to myself. With the time I had left before dinner I changed into regular clothes and washed up a bit, considering I had worked myself to a sweat earlier.

My thoughts turned to wondering what Erwin was going to tell me later. He was acting odd, and that’s saying something bearing in mind it was Erwin. There was a chance it had something to do with my squad, but then wouldn’t he have mentioned it in our meeting yesterday?

I abandoned my pondering in favour of heading down to the hall. Hopefully Petra would be right about Hange being back, as seeing her would lift my spirits. As expected, the room was bustling with people chattering and lounging about. I spotted Knox and a few other friends sitting in our usual spot and made my way over. “Hey guys,” I said in a peppy tone. Around the table was Jean, Connie, Milo, Ottie, and Knox. Milo and Ottie being from Knox’s squad, while Jean and Connie I had gotten acquainted with a few years back on a mission. We had all been friends ever since then.

Jean gave me a sly grin with a mouth full of food. “I heard you ran through the old ODM course today.”

“Ugh, can you not speak with your mouth full?” Ottie grimaced. “Your spitting lettuce all over the place.” She took her napkin and wiped up specks of chewed up food from the table. She did nothing to hide her blatant disgust. From her left side, Jean rolled his eyes.

“Yeah I did, I was just training with Petra and Gunther. How did you hear about that?”

“Oh you know… I have my sources,” he said trying to act smoothly and took another bite of his food.

Connie raised an eyebrow, “Yeah right.” He said and then turned his head to me. “He was at the ODM course today working with Tobias.”

I shook my head with a smile. “You could have just said that Jean,” I chuckle.

He pouted and looked away, but I could hear him mutter, “Yeah but it sounds way less cool.” Everyone just shook their heads. Typical Jean Kirschtein.

A sudden pang of hunger washed over me, and I picked some food off Knox’s plate. “Hey! Go get a plate if you’re hungry.” He smacked my wandering hand away as it went back for more.

“The line is so long,” I whined. “By the time I get something I’ll waste away to nothing.” Was I being dramatic? 1000%. But I knew that they would eventually take pity on me. Knox sighed at my theatrics, but still shoved his plate over to me. I took his pity with grace and began to munch down.

“Jeez Dove, slow down. You’re going to choke,” Connie warned.

“Can’t,” I said between generous mouthfuls. “Erwin wants me to go to his office after I eat. I have a weird feeling about it, and something tells me that I won’t want to eat after I get out of there.”

Ottie was fidgeting with her long blonde hair. “Maybe you’re going to get a new squad?”

At her saying that I could see Knox twitch. “I don’t know… It’s kind of soon. This all happened yesterday, that’s quick even for Erwin.”

I shrugged. “Who knows? By the way I heard that Hange was coming back tonight. Have you guys seen her?”

They all shook their heads. “I haven’t heard anything. Maybe you can ask Erwin,” Connie offered resting his head on his hand.

I nodded and placed the fork I was holding back on the oak table. “Yeah you’re right, I’ll head there now. I’ll talk to you all later.” I stood from my spot and waved as I walked out of the hall. As I exited the building a cool breeze rushed over my form. It was freezing tonight, and I wrapped my cloak tighter to my body as I made my way over to the main building. Walking to Erwin’s office was quick and the closer I got the more nervous I became. I stood in front of the dark wooden door, and I could practically hear my heart in my ears. I took a deep breath and knocked lightly.

I heard movement from the other side and then the door pushed open to reveal a smiling Hange. “Dove!” she jumped to hug me. “I was hoping to see you!” She held me tight, and I was really caught off guard.

“Hange you scared the shit out of me,” I replied but then returned the embrace.

A deep voice spoke from behind Hange. “Dove come in and take a seat.” Hange let me go and I looked behind her to see Erwin sitting behind his desk with a hardened expression. That wasn’t a good sign.

I moved towards the couch and that’s when I noticed that there was another person in the room. My stomach turned and met his gaze. “Ackerman,” I muttered with clear disgust in my tone. He didn’t even respond. Instead choosing to drop the eye contact in favour of looking back towards Erwin.

From his desk Erwin spoke. “You three were asked to meet here because I have a mission that you and your squads will be assigned.”

I raised my hand. “Sir, I don’t have a squad currently.” I whispered with a sense of shame.

From beside me I felt Hange’s hand rub my back to offer some comfort. The air in the room was heavy and Erwin paused for a moment. “Yes I know, and it would be too early to just give you one now.” He was right, it would be too hasty to throw a team together right now. He took in a deep breath and continued, “I am putting together a select group of soldiers, people with a variety of skills, to go with you three and your squads.” He stood from his desk and turned to face the large windows. “There have been a few reports of strange titans within Wall Maria. These titans are not like abnormals though. They have the unpredictable personalities, but they also demonstrate a higher level of intelligence and abilities.” He turned his body to face us. “I had Hange’s squad head out yesterday to check out one of these reports, but we were unsuccessful in finding anything.”

I peered over to look at Hange and they had this unusually serious expression. “All we could find was an area where it looked as though there had been a battle. There were even these odd spots along the grass that looked like there had been a fire. It was like nothing I have seen before.”

This was all so confusing. “Do you think it had to do with my attack yesterday?”

Erwin sighed, “That is unknown right now. I am tasking you three with looking further into this matter. I have yet to inform the Zackly of this yet, the MP’s will surely want to take over the matter if they find out. I’m sure I don’t need to tell you all not to speak of this matter with those that are not involved.”

We all nod. “What will you have us do sir,” I ask hesitantly.

“Within wall Maria, close to Trost, is Eltz Castle. Around that area is where the majority of reports are coming from. You and this team will set up a base of operations there and see if you can look into this mess. Along with that, our hope is that we can expand bunkers further within the wall. If we can create a way to get materials across to the damaged gate, the hope is that we can repair the damage and reclaim wall Maria.” This was a lot to take in. Sure, I expected that eventually we would try to fix the gate, but I honestly hadn’t anticipated that it would be tasked to me. “Now, the team will set off tomorrow,” Erwin continued. “Dove, you and several other soldiers will be under the direction of Levi. Once this mission concludes you will form your new squad then. You will all leave tomorrow morning; you are all dismissed.”

Hold on a moment. Did he just say that I would have to work under Levi? “S-sir, hold on. Did you just say I was under the command of him?” I point aggressively.

Out of the corner of my eye I see shorty smirk. Erwin’s face remains neutral, “Yes that it correct.”

Hange gets up and dismisses herself, I don’t blame her from not wanting to be a part of this. “You know we don’t get along sir; can’t Hange be my superior?” I offer.

Levi interrupts, “Just shut up and accept it.”

I was about to make my own snippy comment, but Erwin slams his hand on his desk, breaking my train of thought. “Enough you two. This has gone on long enough. You both are the best the Scouts have right now, and I will not have your petty fighting ruin this mission. You both will learn to work together and that is final.” He turns to look at me, “Dove you will learn to keep your temper in check, as a leader it is unacceptable.” He then turns to shorty, “Levi your bad attitude has gone on long enough. This terrible relationship was your fault to begin with, and I will not allow it to go further. I won’t hear anymore; you are both dismissed.”

You could hear a pin drop; the room was dead silent. I had never seen Erwin as angry as just now. His aura was fierce, and I would be an idiot if I were to say anything more. I nodded and turned to leave, Levi trailing behind me. This was going to be the worst.

#levi ackerman #levi ackerman x reader #levi #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #hange zoe #eren jeager #armin arlet #erwin smith #levi smut #smut #enemies to lovers #aot #reader insert #fanfiction

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acerace · 3 years

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...you have opened my eyes to a vast universe of VintageBeef lore that I was unaware of. I knew about the New Hermit Order, of course, and the UHC invention, and I've watched a few of his CTM things but -- I will take all the info and lore you feel like giving out because Beef is amazing and my knowledge is so small.

Vintagebeef my beloved <3

So the thing is, right, until about 2016 I only watched two (2) youtubers- Vintagebeef for Minecraft and aDrive for Pokemon (and funnily enough both of them are named Dan irl). So I've watched most of Beef's videos over the years and have a general knowledge of most of his stuff, except because it's been like a decade I don't remember where most of the lore comes from XD

The thing with him is that he doesn't do Lore tm the way other mcyters often do lore- he doesn't have an extensive RP series to draw from like Grian, doesn't have a solo world with steadily increasing amounts of lore like Etho or Zisteau, and while he's played on SMPs and been involved in storylines before it's not really the focus of his episodes unlike with Evo or Legacy or Empires

So where does that leave us?

IRL, Beef always has multiple series running at the same time. Often he's playing on an smp while doing a singleplayer, often modded, series as well as a CTM or modpack with a group of friends. For example, right now he's playing on Hermitcraft, doing weekly Pixelmon and Building a Zoo episodes, and a CTM map with Slip. And to me, this translates to one thing: Beef is an adventurer. He travels frequently- he explores a world and when he decides he's done, he leaves for the next one. That's the basis of my personal interpretation of his series and his character for my writing.

Ok so reading this back, this got extremely long and didn't explain much in the way of lore, somehow? If anyone has any additions to add please do so, I am very definitely leaving out a lot and would love to see what other lore people remember and are using for Beef! I didn’t include the Hermitcraft stuff since my memory of season 4 is blurry (his base was themed after the Martian, that much I know, and he and Iskall were buddies :D) and most of the s5 NHO lore is best watched from Bdub’s perspective from what I remember, and the only s6 stuff is a single line in Hermitgang and then the Area 77 arc with its possibility of an NHO reunion which we did not get rip. And s7 of course had the cloning machine and also the Podzol Party as the main lore. So all the original rambling is still below the cut though it is very long, and I'm gonna bullet point the main stuff here instead:

Actual canonical things:

Invented UHC and was the only survivor of the first ever uhc (Mindcrack UHC s1)

Married to an ender dragon (one of the UHCs I think), later father to a different dragon (Mindcrack season 3? I think?)

Might not have legs if you choose to take that joke as canon (Mindcrack s2)

Was a wizard (RAD)

is a zookeeper (Building a Zoo)

Had a wife and kids (Sims in Minecraft)

Part of the Trial of the B Team court case (Mindcrack)

NHO founder, founder of the Podzol Party (Hermitcraft)

Created a cloning machine that sort of works (Hermitcraft)

Played the Forest which is I believe the first time he and Keralis played together (look up the trigger warnings for this one, it's a horror game)

Was the creator/owner of Sourceblock SMP (featuring some familiar faces if you know Legacy, Empires, or MCC) and there is literal magic from a mysterious sourceblock of water that teleports people and summons mobs and probably more stuff that I haven't seen yet since I'm still watching it myself

Things you can infer:

Good with animals (Life in the Woods, Pixelmon, Ark)

Is a car nerd (irl and all of the car games he's played)

Is a highly experienced adventurer who has traveled through dozens of worlds both vanilla and modded, across multiple dimensions (Twilight Forest, the Aether, the Betweenlands, Limbo), completed dozens of monuments, fought in blood sports, survived apocalypse after apocalypse, tamed dinosaurs, and played a lot of prop hunt and golf with your friends

If you're looking for what to watch for lore purposes, I'd say the Mindcrack UHCs and Team Canada's RAD series are pretty good, definitely Sourceblock and HC s5, plus the Diversity CTM maps and Ruins of the Mindcrackers maybe? And Mindcrack Prank Wars for the chaos and the origin of Team Canada. And if you can handle horror than the Forest is fun and if you don't do horror you can watch the Pojkband play golf or prop hunt they're hilarious I love them sm I want a Pojkband reunion So Bad

Beef's first series was a singleplayer series in beta 1.4_01 though he had played the game extensively before that, and was a big fan of Guude, having watched his own Minecraft videos. The series was functionally a hardcore one where if he died Beef would delete the world and start again! I haven't actually Watched this series so idk if he died or how often lmao. When Guude made Mindcrack, which was btw one of the very first Minecraft SMPs, he also hosted a competition for people to join, and Beef submitted a video (which is still viewable on his channel I believe!) and won, and was added to Mindcrack in season 2 :D (fun fact, Guude said that even if Beef hadn’t won he would have added him anyway)

Two running jokes emerged from Mindcrack- pulling a Vintagebeef and Beef doesn't have legs. The first is a reference to Beef dying of fall damage (I believe the exact instance was him trying to jump into his swimming pool and failing spectacularly) and after the incident, every time someone died of fall damage they were pulling a Vintagebeef. The second joke comes from Guude, who joked that the reason Beef wasn't going to a convention was because he didn't have legs, and then he pranked Beef's base by building a giant pair of legs at the entrance to his castle so you had to walk between them to get into the base. This joke has long since died and both Beef and Guude feel pretty bad about it iirc because there were people who genuinely thought Beef was disabled and were emailing him supportive messages and stuff oops. So if you go looking on the Salad or find old Mindcrack fics, you might see references to Beef having prosthetic legs!

Mindcrack also brought about the creation of several Player groups- Team Nancy Drew, Team Canada, and GOB to name a few relevant to Beef. Team Nancy Drew consists of Beef, Pauseunpause, Guude, and Baj, who formed to investigate a prank on one of the members but I forget who. They're named Nancy Drew after the detective! Team Canada also formed in retaliation to pranks, with it consisting of Beef, Etho, and Pause, the three Canadian members on the server (not including Adlington who moved to Canada but never joined the group). There was also a Team America who pranked them with American flags everywhere. GOB is Guude, OMGChad, and Beef, who played stuff like the Ragecraft, Pantheon, and Monstrosity ctms together but that's way down the line lol

Team Nancy Drew is also notable for inventing UHC. It was Beef's brainchild but it was the four of them who first played it! The first UHC had the four of them working to kill the dragon with no natural regen, with everyone dying but Beef, who "won" the UHC. The second uhc was still dragon focused and iirc is where Beef married the dragon? Memories are hazy but they do kill the dragon in this one I think. UHC was then revamped as a pvp event and became a regular Mindcrack game every few months, featuring most of the Mindcrackers and several special guests, including Dinnerbone, who as we know Thanos-snapped Doc's arm out of existence as a result of Doc killing him in one of them

In one of the seasons of Mindcrack, Beef invited swedish Mindcracker and good friend Anderzel to go caving with him and invented ABBA Rules caving, where the winner takes it all. ABBA Rules is a game where each ore (and also dungeon loot like nametags) is assigned a point value and the person with the most points at the end wins and gets to keep all the stuff collected from the game.

In Mindcrack season 3?, Beef punched the ender dragon in an... awkward area, so when the dragon died and left the egg behind, Guude said Beef was the father of the egg XD I don't remember if I watched s3 so I have no idea if anything Happened with this concept but *history of the world voice* you could make lore out of this!

So Team Canada has played a Lot of CTM maps (which fun fact were pretty much invented by another Mindcrack member, Vechs, with his Super Hostile series! Super Hostile has a bunch of things called "Zistonian", which are references to another Mindcrack member Zisteau, who has a very wild singleplayer series with even wilder lore but I digress). In Ruins of the Mindcrackers, they had a running joke that Beef was Etho and Pause's mom, which is a joke we can leave in the past actually /lh. They also played all the Diversity maps, Sky Factory, Terra Restore, Uncharted Territory uhhh and a couple more ctms and adventure maps! Each map kinda has its own story so in Diversity 3 for example they were trapped in a simulation? I think? Team Canada also recently played the Roguelike Adventures and Dungeons modpack, aka RAD, in which Beef was a wizard with a magic staff that could do anything from summon lightning to control hostile mobs.

Sourceblock SMP is a vanilla survival 1.14 series that ran for one season and the series starts with each of the Players being drawn to a strange sparkling water source that, once they touch it, brings them to the Sourceblock world. It also summons a giant zombie at one point. There's probably more lore for this series but like I said I haven't watched it all the way through yet

He has a Patreon server called VintageCraft and has done a series or two on there as well, and played a few UHCs with them, so lore that how you will!

Beef also played a few popular mods, notably Pixelmon, Life in the Woods, and Feed the Beast, with LitW being singleplayer and the other multiplayer. He's also recently played the Zoo and Wild Animals mod a lot. He did a short series with the Minecraft Comes Alive mod where he married one of the villagers and had two children, so that's canon now :D he’s played a Lot of Pixelmon starting when the mod first came out iirc (he chose Turtwig in his first series and built a Grass gym, then made a Normal gym in another series in uhh 2016) and he still plays to this day. Quite a few Hermits played on his Pixelmon servers with him, like Wels, Etho, Iskall, Stress, Slip, Zueljin, and also Guude and Phedran (a Mindcrack adjacent player and creator of the LitW modpack) and a few Mindcrackers on the older servers

Mindcrack and friends played a lot of other games too- 7 Days to Die, Ark Survival Evolved, Unturned, to name a few, so you can pull a lot of lore out of these as well. Speaking of friends and non-Minecraft games, Beef teamed up with Pause, Keralis, and Slip (a former Hermit) to play the horror game the Forest, which saw them stuck on an island trying to survive against terrifying mutated human... things. They played it a few times as the game updated but as afaik it's the first time Beef played with Keralis and possibly Slip and since the game starts with the Player's airplane crashing, that could totally be how Beef first met them in-universe

I... think? that’s everything I mentioned in the tags? There is probably way more stuff I’ve forgotten that stems from inside jokes and things that happen within each series, but I hope that was a) helpful and b) at least somewhat comprehensible lmao

#hermitcraft #mindcrack #vintagebeef #mcyt #long post #asks #redwinterrises #that was so many words #kudos to anyone who reads the whole thing lmao

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