For the ask game you recently posted: S an example of a personal headcanon
hiiiii, thank you for asking!! 💖
S - Show us an example of your personal headcanon
okay so.
i think that obi-wan struggled with depressiion for a while after tpm and babykin (among other people, like windu and yoda) helped him with it. of course, obi-wan took still took care of Anakin and did his job as his master as best as he could, but he also "forgot" to take care of himself and found it hard to leave his quarters when he had time off.
and that's where anakin comes in! i just know that he felt the need to help what was basically his only friend to get better. not that he could do that much, with being nine and all, but even bringing obi-wan something to eat and telling him about his day to cheer him up helped. needless to say, obi-wan felt extremely guilty about it, but how could he say no to his tiny padawan who only ever wanted to help and hated feeling like a burden?
and that's why their friendship is so special!!
thanks a lot for asking, send mooooore <3
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379 of 2022
Planets:
Life
Mercury: What’s your full name? I'm Joeri, but I'm not going to share the rest of my name, even though it's common here.
Venus: What’s your first language? Dutch.
Earth: Where’s your home? Middelkerke, Belgium. Even though I live somewhere else now.
Mars: What’s your sexuality? Asexual, possibly aromantic or at least very greyromantic, and definitely homo-oriented.
Jupiter: Do you have any siblings? One sister, she's 5 years younger than me.
Saturn: Any pets? Two cats.
Uranus: What’s your hobby? Shortwave radio and all things related - number stations, signal identification, all that. Also photography and travelling.
Neptune: When’s your birthday? 25 April.
Pluto: What time is it right now where you are? 21:34.
Moon: What are you currently studying/hope to study? I've been in the process of getting a degree from Dutch language, but I'm on hold due to my health problems. I have one more degree, though, from electrical engineering.
Stars:
Experiences
Sun: Have you ever had alcohol? Many times.
Sirius: Have you ever failed a class? Yeah, first time in uni. Anxiety was eating me up.
Rigel: Have you ever gone on a rollercoaster? Nope, and I don't think I ever would.
Deneb: Have you ever been out of your home country? I've been to 5 countries in total, not counting my own.
Arcturus: Have you cried out of something other than sadness? No, I don't cry.
Betelgeuse: What’s something you can never forget about? Taking my medication on time.
Aldebaran: What’s something you care desperately about? People I love.
Canopus: Have you ever broken a bone? No, never.
Bellatrix: Have you ever been forced to lie/keep a secret? No, but I keep secrets by nature. Maybe I should count my abuser to that, though.
Alphard: Have you ever lost a friend? Yes. Three years ago. I've had a very close friend who has the same first name as me, and he used to call me "his little brother". One day he just cut contacts with all of us, I didn't know why. Just this year I found out depressiion has overwhelmed him.
Vega: What’s something you’ve done that you wish you hadn’t? Had sex.
Constellations:
Favourites
Centaurus: Favourite holiday? Christmas, maybe Easter.
Orion: Favourite month? Anything from May to September.
Cassiopeia: Favourite book? Too many to count, I love reading books.
Delphinus: Favourite study? Physics, particularly electromagnetic waves.
Hercules: Favourite instrument? Violin.
Gemini: Favourite song? I have two ultimate favourites: Vildhjarta - Shiver and Lange Frans & Baas B - Ik Wacht Al Zo Lang.
Pegasus: Favourite place to be? My hometown.
Libra: Favourite colour? Black and green.
Phoenix: Favourite thing to wear? Hoodies, t-shirts with graphic prints, cargo trousers, wide leg trousers, platform boots or Converse.
Aries: Favourite movie? I don't like movies.
Cygnus: Favourite weather? Warm and sunny, or thunderstorms.
Hydra: Favourite sound? Sea waves, cat's purring, rain outside the window.
Galaxies:
Love/Friends
Milky Way: Who’s your oldest friend? M., I think.
Andromeda: Do you consider yourself social? Quite so.
Black Eye Galaxy: Do you believe in love at first sight? No. I get that sometimes people just click, but I have hard time considering it love. Not when you've known somreone for 5 minutes.
Cartwheel Galaxy: When was your first kiss? I was 22 at that time. Didn't like it much.
Cigar Galaxy: How’s your flirting skills? I come across as flirty, that's what I've heard about myself. But I'm quite oblivious to the body language and all that stuff. I'm just being nice to people by default.
Comet Galaxy: Have you ever had to leave a relationship because someone changed too much? No. The reason was he has shown his true face.
Pinwheel Galaxy: Would you date the last person you talked to? He's my husband already.
Sombrero Galaxy: Do you have a crush right now? Kind of, but it's rather platonic so it doesn't collide with my relationship.
Bode’s Galaxy: Have you ever had a secret admirer? No, this person was very open about it.
Sunflower Galaxy: Would you date/make friends with someone out of pity? No, I don't think so. I'd need a bond first.
Tadpole Galaxy: Would you deny a relationship/friendship? No, why would I even?
Whirlpool Galaxy: Have you ever cried over a breakup? Not cried, but it was emotionally devastating. He wasn't good to me, though.
Other stuff:
Wishes
Comet: What’s your big dream? To be healthy, and to come back to work.
Asteroid: What does your dream life look like? No disorders.
Meteor: What’s something you wish you could tell, but can’t? To this man, how much I like him and how Iwant to be friends with him.
Nebula: If you could undo one thing in your life, what would it be? That incident that took my physical abilities away.
Shooting Star: If you could bring back one thing, what would it be? Basketball trainings.
Pulsar: What do you hope to do in the next 10 years? Still alive.
Supernova: What’s one thing you want to do before you die? Travel the whole world.
Quasar: If you could spend the rest of your life with only one person, who would it be? My husband.
Wormhole: What’s something you wish would happen, but know won’t? Being friends with this man.
Black Hole: What’s the last thing you want to see? I don't want to think about it.
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• when i worry you do not love me •
when i ask if you hate me, if you’re annoyed, if you’re still happy, or if you love me, i do not mean to be a pain.
i do not intend for you to feel bad, or make you feel as though you have or haven’t done something to make me feel this way.
the truth is, deep in my core, i am traumatised. i did not know real love until i met you, and to have an unloved life is not a life at all.
i have been hurt, badly. this hurt has trained me to emotionally respond in ways that may not make sense to you. but when you are on your phone and being quiet, i feel unwanted. i have been taught that this is a punishment for being too loud, or too much.
when you leave to do things that you want to do, and i am not invited, or you say “you can come if you want”, my brain has been trained to understand that i am unwelcome on this journey, for this task, with these people. so i do not join; i instead wonder why i am not good enough to come along.
when i am quiet, i apologise. i have been trained to stay quiet - i can be seen, but not heard. i have not been worthy of taking up space, time, or energy. i remain quiet to keep the peace, for if not i am treated like less than a human.
i want you to understand that you do not make me feel this way. i know you do not want me to be quiet, reserved or in my shell.. but years of training has become harder to break than i anticipated.
i am trying. i am sorry. and i want you to know i love you.
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Saturn and Jupiter * start today *
Today Jupiter and Saturn seem to move close enough so she can’t stay aside. From herself. Putting herself in the cupboard full of books, fantasies, escapes, hidden pain and fears - enough. Her Jupiter is all her passion to start anew, new journey beyond, in the landscape of wild unknown; her optimism - an unexcused smile of a girl standing on the road, eyes closed (or is she blind?), strange clothes found in the dark forest, dying light of fireflies in the hair. But she’s ready to go because it’s never too late to start over, because another circle is finished, shadow she was facing has sunk deep - and now her body, her mind, her soul frozen waiting for her to take a step beyond.
Her Saturn is here as well, it’s her time, her father and traditions she was connected with life after life, her limits, her room. It asks her if she checked her wounds and fears before going. And isn’t it foolish to be that way if she can just stay? And where is her blanket to wrap her heart?
Today, at this moment with her stars and cosmic pathways, lost, fearful, forgetful, she is sitting to remember.
Birds in the trees, winter solstice is coming. Jupiter and Saturn in conjunction at zero degree.
In the moment between expansion and contraction, between Jupiter and Saturn, just before winter solstice, remember yourself.
It’s never too late to start over.
You need yourself.
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