#comedy sentence prompts
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𝐃𝐎𝐖𝐍 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒 .
from the 2003 film by peyton reed . please amend quotes where required !
“ we’re acting like two people ... in love . ”
“ you sure do get way laid . ”
“ you said she was a spinster ! ”
“ i’ve never used the word ‘spinster’ in my life . okay , once , when i told my mother it was technically incorrect to call her son a spinster . ”
“ earth still is my favourite planet . ”
“ you know i have no interest in seeing you . ”
“ i just wanted you to hear all this from me before you heard it from your private eye . ”
“ what would you say is the average length for most men ? ”
“ let me see yours again , then . we could measure . i’ll get a ruler . ”
“ it stays up all the way , all day long ! ”
“ sixteen inches ? how long does a man’s hose have to be ? ”
“ that’s thirty three inches of confidence in every step . ”
“ the men who resent my success won’t give me the time of day , and the men who respect my success won’t give me the time of night . ”
“ i’d respect you and resent you night and day ! ”
“ if you’ve got a dream , this is the place to make that dream come true . ”
“ it doesn’t take a nasa rocket scientist to figure that out . ”
“ i’d like to get to know you better . ”
“ well , i can’t get to know you all the way better until i know you much , much better . ”
“ do you feel you know me well enough for me to buy you a drink ? ”
“ have a candy bar for your trouble . ”
“ but i’m always thinking of you . i can’t stop thinking of you . ”
“ we can get married there right away . i’m not letting you get away again . ”
“ i don’t understand this . how does a person lose their built-in bar ? ”
“ you’re fired . ”
“ the story ? it’s written ? ”
“ i’d like to , really , i would . but just the fact that i’d like to give you another chance is the very reason i absolutely must not . ”
“ i don’t care about sex anymore . i just want to get married . ”
“ he usually calls to cancel right on time . ”
“ do you want to marry me or not ? ”
“ this is the first time i’ve lost a future with a man before we’ve had the time to have a past . ”
“ that’s no reason the two of us can’t get married . ”
“ i’ve never seen anything so beautiful . ”
“ well then , let’s get to bed . i’ll call you a taxi . ”
“ can you keep a secret ? ”
“ she’s thrown away everything you’ve sent her ; flowers , chocolates , a $6000 celestron telescope that wasn’t yours to send because it was mine . ”
“ crush her , squash her . if not for the sake of civilisation , then just for me . ”
“ it’s so nice to finally meet you in person . ”
“ my goodness , you’re gorgeous ! ”
“ would you mind pouring me a cup of coffee ? ”
“ my analyst says i only react to you with such vehement loathing because i admire you so much . ”
“ i hate to ask , but could we raincheck until breakfast ? ”
“ if you’re looking to get dinner , then just say so . ”
“ i wouldn’t meet with you in a hundred years ! ”
“ tell him we’re too busy . ”
“ maybe we could find you an astronaut who’s been in orbit the past two weeks . ”
“ i’m perfectly content on my own . ”
“ who knew you were so dangerous ? ”
“ after the date i had tonight , i really didn’t want to be alone . ”
“ what were you doing at a party like that ? ”
“ this argument has made me realise that i must really care about you . ”
“ i’m sorry i have to say this , but i love you . ”
“ well i don’t have any rules about men falling in love . ”
“ i think i’ll just get married . ”
“ well , call the guard , because i don’t want to see him . ”
#rp prompts#rp sentence prompts#romance sentence prompts#comedy sentence prompts#this film just sends me always so
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𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 𝐌𝐘 𝐎𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐇𝐀𝐒 𝐒𝐀𝐈𝐃 : 𝒑𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝒕𝒘𝒐 ♡ 𝚜𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚌𝚎 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚜.
per request in high demand , here’s a second list of absolutely batshit , out of pocket things my original character has said. triggers and nsfw will be present in this specific meme.
“ there aren't enough men crumbling at my feet. ”
“ knocked loose pit , but it's just me shaking my ass for dollars to ARF ARF! ”
“ i need to girlypop in the pit so bad. ”
“ i wanna beat my father with his own bones. ”
“ he is so mean and unfriendly , i have GOT to fuck him. ”
“ cream cheese wontons , my beloved . . . ”
“ it's okay to not have a valentine on valentine's day. i didn't have a father on father's day. ”
“ can i put ‘ gives great head ’ on my resume? ”
“ there's either a latte or vodka in this mug. ”
“ the sluttiest thing a man can do is wear jewelry. ”
“ sometimes you're just a 25 second ryan kirby scream away from mental clarity. ”
“ this bitch will be like , ‘ i’d rather die than have a complex thought ’ , and then text me at 2am to tell me the deepest introspective shit i’ve ever heard. ”
“ just know that if i ever slept with you , it was an act of self–harm. ”
“ if loving sluts was a crime , i'd do life. ”
“ i crawled out of my coffin like this. ”
“ some of you didn't grow up a stigmatic and it shows. ”
“ life update : cheeks still fat enough to be clapping when i breathe. ”
“ hey , sorry i've been radio silent. i self–isolated to be quirky. ”
“ ask me what's in my fanny pack. yes , it is spaghetti , and yes there’s also garlic bread. you never know when a bitch will get hungry. it’s my first aid kit. ”
“ when you're mean to me , do you stop to consider i have a huge rack? ”
“ i’m aware he’s committed several atrocities , but have you stopped to consider he’s my babygirl? ”
“ i don’t have mental stability. i have a fat ass. it’s an equal trade off. ”
“ having a soul connection with a man is so embarrassing. i need to be lobotomized. ”
#rp meme#rp memes#rp ask meme#rp ask memes#ask meme#ask memes#sentence starter meme#sentence starter memes#ask prompt#ask prompts#genre: comedy#type: miscellaneous
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Wellington Paranormal Sentences
(Sentences from Wellington Paranormal (2018-2022). Adjust phrasing where needed)
"I don't joke at work."
"This is, to my mind, some sort of extraterrestrial activity."
"If we identify a UFO, does that just mean it's an FO?"
"I don't care if you are from another planet; if you come here, you should respect our rules."
"Are you sure you're not just fantasising?"
"Maybe you're not the best there is, but you're the best around here."
"There's no such thing as saying too much when talking to a police officer."
"So, I think the moral of the story here is don't muck around with the dark arts."
"In police training, you learn how to deal with every situation, but I think I must have been sick on this day."
"Well, that was a strange one."
"What are criminals going to think if you show up to an arrest wearing that?"
"Hey, are you experiencing an ominous sense of foreboding?"
"This is my childhood bedroom, so I'd appreciate you not criticising it."
"I don't think I can be hypnotised. You've got to be open to suggestion, and I'm not."
"Yeah, I guess I could have been a bad boy, but instead I'm a good boy who's still a bit of a bad boy."
"I actually hate guns, but hey, it's part of the job."
"Please be aliens, please be aliens, please be aliens..."
"So, how did you become a hostage?"
"I'm in the police, so rules are kind of my thing."
"I almost died and you're cracking jokes!"
"Look, we all have tough days. All I'm saying is you've got to do your best to be nice to people."
"I actually have a penchant for the occult and other such cryptid mysteries."
"I just made a few mistakes tonight that made me question whether I should be a cop at all, you know?"
"Hey, do you think I'd suit a goatee?"
#rp meme#rp memes#roleplay meme#roleplay memes#rp prompts#roleplay prompts#sentence starters#specific;#crime drama;#supernatural drama;#filmtv;#wellington paranormal;#comedy drama;
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Rifftrax quotes
#rifftrax#quotes#Rifftrax quotes#mine#comedy#lists#writing inspiration#prompts#lol#writing prompts#writing inspo#funny#sentence starters#starters
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I assure you, an AI didn’t write a terrible “George Carlin” routine
There are only TWO MORE DAYS left in the Kickstarter for the audiobook of The Bezzle, the sequel to Red Team Blues, narrated by @wilwheaton! You can pre-order the audiobook and ebook, DRM free, as well as the hardcover, signed or unsigned. There's also bundles with Red Team Blues in ebook, audio or paperback.
On Hallowe'en 1974, Ronald Clark O'Bryan murdered his son with poisoned candy. He needed the insurance money, and he knew that Halloween poisonings were rampant, so he figured he'd get away with it. He was wrong:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ronald_Clark_O%27Bryan
The stories of Hallowe'en poisonings were just that – stories. No one was poisoning kids on Hallowe'en – except this monstrous murderer, who mistook rampant scare stories for truth and assumed (incorrectly) that his murder would blend in with the crowd.
Last week, the dudes behind the "comedy" podcast Dudesy released a "George Carlin" comedy special that they claimed had been created, holus bolus, by an AI trained on the comedian's routines. This was a lie. After the Carlin estate sued, the dudes admitted that they had written the (remarkably unfunny) "comedy" special:
https://arstechnica.com/ai/2024/01/george-carlins-heirs-sue-comedy-podcast-over-ai-generated-impression/
As I've written, we're nowhere near the point where an AI can do your job, but we're well past the point where your boss can be suckered into firing you and replacing you with a bot that fails at doing your job:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/15/passive-income-brainworms/#four-hour-work-week
AI systems can do some remarkable party tricks, but there's a huge difference between producing a plausible sentence and a good one. After the initial rush of astonishment, the stench of botshit becomes unmistakable:
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2024/jan/03/botshit-generative-ai-imminent-threat-democracy
Some of this botshit comes from people who are sold a bill of goods: they're convinced that they can make a George Carlin special without any human intervention and when the bot fails, they manufacture their own botshit, assuming they must be bad at prompting the AI.
This is an old technology story: I had a friend who was contracted to livestream a Canadian awards show in the earliest days of the web. They booked in multiple ISDN lines from Bell Canada and set up an impressive Mbone encoding station on the wings of the stage. Only one problem: the ISDNs flaked (this was a common problem with ISDNs!). There was no way to livecast the show.
Nevertheless, my friend's boss's ordered him to go on pretending to livestream the show. They made a big deal of it, with all kinds of cool visualizers showing the progress of this futuristic marvel, which the cameras frequently lingered on, accompanied by overheated narration from the show's hosts.
The weirdest part? The next day, my friend – and many others – heard from satisfied viewers who boasted about how amazing it had been to watch this show on their computers, rather than their TVs. Remember: there had been no stream. These people had just assumed that the problem was on their end – that they had failed to correctly install and configure the multiple browser plugins required. Not wanting to admit their technical incompetence, they instead boasted about how great the show had been. It was the Emperor's New Livestream.
Perhaps that's what happened to the Dudesy bros. But there's another possibility: maybe they were captured by their own imaginations. In "Genesis," an essay in the 2007 collection The Creationists, EL Doctorow (no relation) describes how the ancient Babylonians were so poleaxed by the strange wonder of the story they made up about the origin of the universe that they assumed that it must be true. They themselves weren't nearly imaginative enough to have come up with this super-cool tale, so God must have put it in their minds:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/29/gedankenexperimentwahn/#high-on-your-own-supply
That seems to have been what happened to the Air Force colonel who falsely claimed that a "rogue AI-powered drone" had spontaneously evolved the strategy of killing its operator as a way of clearing the obstacle to its main objective, which was killing the enemy:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/06/04/ayyyyyy-eyeeeee/
This never happened. It was – in the chagrined colonel's words – a "thought experiment." In other words, this guy – who is the USAF's Chief of AI Test and Operations – was so excited about his own made up story that he forgot it wasn't true and told a whole conference-room full of people that it had actually happened.
Maybe that's what happened with the George Carlinbot 3000: the Dudesy dudes fell in love with their own vision for a fully automated luxury Carlinbot and forgot that they had made it up, so they just cheated, assuming they would eventually be able to make a fully operational Battle Carlinbot.
That's basically the Theranos story: a teenaged "entrepreneur" was convinced that she was just about to produce a seemingly impossible, revolutionary diagnostic machine, so she faked its results, abetted by investors, customers and others who wanted to believe:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theranos
The thing about stories of AI miracles is that they are peddled by both AI's boosters and its critics. For boosters, the value of these tall tales is obvious: if normies can be convinced that AI is capable of performing miracles, they'll invest in it. They'll even integrate it into their product offerings and then quietly hire legions of humans to pick up the botshit it leaves behind. These abettors can be relied upon to keep the defects in these products a secret, because they'll assume that they've committed an operator error. After all, everyone knows that AI can do anything, so if it's not performing for them, the problem must exist between the keyboard and the chair.
But this would only take AI so far. It's one thing to hear implausible stories of AI's triumph from the people invested in it – but what about when AI's critics repeat those stories? If your boss thinks an AI can do your job, and AI critics are all running around with their hair on fire, shouting about the coming AI jobpocalypse, then maybe the AI really can do your job?
https://locusmag.com/2020/07/cory-doctorow-full-employment/
There's a name for this kind of criticism: "criti-hype," coined by Lee Vinsel, who points to many reasons for its persistence, including the fact that it constitutes an "academic business-model":
https://sts-news.medium.com/youre-doing-it-wrong-notes-on-criticism-and-technology-hype-18b08b4307e5
That's four reasons for AI hype:
to win investors and customers;
to cover customers' and users' embarrassment when the AI doesn't perform;
AI dreamers so high on their own supply that they can't tell truth from fantasy;
A business-model for doomsayers who form an unholy alliance with AI companies by parroting their silliest hype in warning form.
But there's a fifth motivation for criti-hype: to simplify otherwise tedious and complex situations. As Jamie Zawinski writes, this is the motivation behind the obvious lie that the "autonomous cars" on the streets of San Francisco have no driver:
https://www.jwz.org/blog/2024/01/driverless-cars-always-have-a-driver/
GM's Cruise division was forced to shutter its SF operations after one of its "self-driving" cars dragged an injured pedestrian for 20 feet:
https://www.wired.com/story/cruise-robotaxi-self-driving-permit-revoked-california/
One of the widely discussed revelations in the wake of the incident was that Cruise employed 1.5 skilled technical remote overseers for every one of its "self-driving" cars. In other words, they had replaced a single low-waged cab driver with 1.5 higher-paid remote operators.
As Zawinski writes, SFPD is well aware that there's a human being (or more than one human being) responsible for every one of these cars – someone who is formally at fault when the cars injure people or damage property. Nevertheless, SFPD and SFMTA maintain that these cars can't be cited for moving violations because "no one is driving them."
But figuring out who which person is responsible for a moving violation is "complicated and annoying to deal with," so the fiction persists.
(Zawinski notes that even when these people are held responsible, they're a "moral crumple zone" for the company that decided to enroll whole cities in nonconsensual murderbot experiments.)
Automation hype has always involved hidden humans. The most famous of these was the "mechanical Turk" hoax: a supposed chess-playing robot that was just a puppet operated by a concealed human operator wedged awkwardly into its carapace.
This pattern repeats itself through the ages. Thomas Jefferson "replaced his slaves" with dumbwaiters – but of course, dumbwaiters don't replace slaves, they hide slaves:
https://www.stuartmcmillen.com/blog/behind-the-dumbwaiter/
The modern Mechanical Turk – a division of Amazon that employs low-waged "clickworkers," many of them overseas – modernizes the dumbwaiter by hiding low-waged workforces behind a veneer of automation. The MTurk is an abstract "cloud" of human intelligence (the tasks MTurks perform are called "HITs," which stands for "Human Intelligence Tasks").
This is such a truism that techies in India joke that "AI" stands for "absent Indians." Or, to use Jathan Sadowski's wonderful term: "Potemkin AI":
https://reallifemag.com/potemkin-ai/
This Potemkin AI is everywhere you look. When Tesla unveiled its humanoid robot Optimus, they made a big flashy show of it, promising a $20,000 automaton was just on the horizon. They failed to mention that Optimus was just a person in a robot suit:
https://www.siliconrepublic.com/machines/elon-musk-tesla-robot-optimus-ai
Likewise with the famous demo of a "full self-driving" Tesla, which turned out to be a canned fake:
https://www.reuters.com/technology/tesla-video-promoting-self-driving-was-staged-engineer-testifies-2023-01-17/
The most shocking and terrifying and enraging AI demos keep turning out to be "Just A Guy" (in Molly White's excellent parlance):
https://twitter.com/molly0xFFF/status/1751670561606971895
And yet, we keep falling for it. It's no wonder, really: criti-hype rewards so many different people in so many different ways that it truly offers something for everyone.
If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/29/pay-no-attention/#to-the-little-man-behind-the-curtain
Back the Kickstarter for the audiobook of The Bezzle here!
Image:
Cryteria (modified)
https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:HAL9000.svg
CC BY 3.0
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en
--
Ross Breadmore (modified)
https://www.flickr.com/photos/rossbreadmore/5169298162/
CC BY 2.0
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/
#pluralistic#ai#absent indians#mechanical turks#scams#george carlin#comedy#body-snatchers#fraud#theranos#guys in robot suits#criti-hype#machine learning#fake it til you make it#too good to fact-check#mturk#deepfakes
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♡ POV: Being The Itoshi Brother’s Elder Sister ♡
Part 1/ Part 2/ Part 3/ Part 4
An introduction to the oldest sibling
you are a very popular idol in Japan (˶‾᷄ ⁻̫ ‾᷅˵)
tags: idol!you, crack comedy, reunion, familial love, sfw
notes: well… being popular and also being the eldest of the Itoshi siblings, you are undeniably very dramatic, sassy and gorgeously demanding in every way.
ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•
“Why isn’t he answering my calls!”
You scowled and threw your phone across the room, scaring your manager in the process.
“C-calm down,” your manager scurried to pacify your tantrum.
Pouting cutely as Mr manager massages your back with nervous peals of laughter, you complained, “Does he not love me anymore?”
You just completed your commercial shooting for the day and were looking forward to surprising your cute youngest brother. Why? Well, it is obviously not because you are the most loving sister but because you saw Rin and this blue lock thingamajig on the news by chance٩( ᐛ )و .
It just hit you that you’ve never really stayed in contact with your family members being so busy with your line of work. Being popular is no easy task sigh suffering from success ✌︎('ω')✌︎.
So, seeing your youngest brother in the news instead of yourself prompted you to feign the “concerned-older-sister” role.
In your Versace heels, you sauntered towards the strewn phone. Very bothered and annoyed by how Rin is not picking up the call, you continuously and unyieldingly called him.
And finally, the call went through.
“Rin-”
“WHO ARE YOU AND WHY DO YOU KEEP CALLING ME?! STOP IT!”
Your eyes twitched, “and who are you supposed to be?”
“YOU ARE THE ONE WHO CALLED ME, AREN’T YOU SUPPOSE TO KNOW WHO I AM?”
*BEEP*
The stranger on the other side of the call aggressively put down the phone.
Oh… you got the wrong number. After years of having no contact with Rin obviously, he would have changed his number. Ehe ~
Blushing at your silly mistake, you gripped your phone and quickly dialled another saved contact which you know will definitely be the right number… hopefully ╮(╯▽╰)╭
As soon as you pressed the call button, the other side of the line quickly picked up the call.
“Sister.”
How you missed that deadpan voice that brought you butterflies to your stomach so much that it hurts.
“How can you be so heartless to your sister, Sae,” you dramatically whined at him, “but it flatters me that you picked up the phone so quickly. I think I just fell in love! Aren’t you in Spain right now?”
A quick calculation on Japan and Spain’s time zone, Sae should still be asleep right now. Was it because he is always waiting for his deadly gorgeous sister to call him\(//∇//)\?
But his next sentence brought you out of your delusion.
“I’m in Japan right now, didn’t you see my text?”
“Oh,” you managed to blurt out. You definitely did not see that text. (・・?)
“Why did you call? You rarely call,” Sae broke the silence with a fact.
Yes, a FACT that you never bothered to contact either Sae or Rin since pursuing your dream of becoming an idol at the tender age of 12 years young. It’s been years since you have spoken to them, therefore it’s a fact that you have been a very absent sister.
That does not mean you were not aware of the inner workings and happenings of the Itoshi household. Be it the brothers having some drama between them or Sae finding success in Spain or whatever. You have your own sources, it only depends on how fast or slow news reaches you, an example being the ever-so-elusive Rin.
You quickly cleared your throat and proposed, “Let's go on a date to catch up since you are in Japan!”
At the very corner of the room, Mr manager stumbled upon the very word “date”.
“That’s impossible,” Sae said word for word leaving you extremely astonished.
“Why?”
Sae mentally sighed at you —his sister. He always knew you weren’t the brightest star in the sky but he did not want to explain that you being the most popular idol in Japan and him being the best football player in Japan casually hanging out together in public despite being siblings is just a present for the media —literally making it Christmas for them.
He could already imagine the headlines.
“Are you embarrassed by your sister, Mr hotshot,” Sae's lips drew a line at your overly dramatic tendencies.
“No… let’s just not meet in public,” he tried to compromise.
There was a silence on the other side of the line until you spoke up, “Alright then, 12:30pm at my house.”
“Ok. When- ”
“Today.”
Sae looked at his watch: 11am. He didn’t really have any plans today too.
“Ok.”
“I’ll send you the location!” With that, you hung up the phone.
Yet again, Sae let out another long mental sigh. He got some explaining to do to his manager.
You on the other hand, mentally cheered.
Whatever you want, you got it. Talk about being extremely demanding — thank goodness your little brother was extremely compliant.
~
Hearing the doorbell ring, you wasted no time opening the door and embraced the person in front of you not caring about personal space.
Sae could only stand still hands still on each side of his body — stood rooted on the ground.
“You’ve grown so tall!” You took a good look at Sae. Oh, what a handsome young man he has grown into! You wondered how many girl's hearts he has broken with his devilish looks, especially with that deadpan expression of his.
“That goes the same for you too.”
That is true, you were above the average female height making companies want to hire you to be their model. Perfect body, perfect face — the perfect recipe for being the most popular idol! ☆〜（ゝ。∂）
“Don’t you miss your sister?” You smiled cheekily awaiting his response.
“Not really,” as expected from your younger brother.
“Don’t be so cold~ I prepared some of your favourite dishes.” You led Sae into the dining room. The table was filled with delivery food.
She must’ve rushed to order all these, Sae thought to himself.
Despite being a cold and arrogant football player, Sae still knows how to respect his elders. He sat on the chair and slowly helped himself.
“Eat up!” You cheered.
You took a sit in front of Sae eyeing him as he elegantly ate the food with the most immaculate posture.
The reason why you called Sae out or more accurately over to your house was to obviously get Rin’s number.
You could have easily gotten his number from your parents but before your brain could get to that idea, Sae was already in front of you. So uh why not just ask him. (๑･̑◡･̑๑)
You wouldn’t consider yourself stupid, and some people might even call you a bimbo oh the audacity, but that’s beside the point!!
“Do you have a girlfriend?” That was your way to break the ice. Ehe~ ✌︎('ω')✌︎
“No time for that.”
“Does Rin have a girlfriend?”
“Sister.” Sae stopped and eyed you.
“So does he?” Ignorance was a blessing so you keenly eyed Sae waiting for his response.
“…”
“Can I have his number then?” You shamelessly took out your phone and gave it to Sae not caring if he was uncaring or not.
To be honest, you weren’t too sure if Sae had Rin’s number due to their damn drama going on but part of you were confident Sae had it. After all, he’s an older brother to Rin.
And true enough, he did have Rin’s number. Sae took your phone and inserted Rin’s number without referring to his phone, meaning he knew his number by heart.
Oho~
You took back your phone and smiled, “what a good brother you are.”
Sae did not say a thing to that.
“So where are you staying while you are here in Japan?”
“Hotel.”
Hotel? Hmmm, you could finally be a good older sister if you allowed him to stay in your penthouse. That is right! What a great idea from my brilliant mind!
“Come stay with me,” you offered, or more like you demanded, “Don’t reject me please, Sae.”
You held both of his hands with a good grip and looked at him with your best puppy eyes that won the hearts of millions. No way he can say no right? PLEASE JUST SAY YES.
Sae wavered and thought about it. He would immediately leave after the U-20 Japan vs Blue Lock match, so it’s just a temporary adjustment.
“Ok.” He surrendered.
Plus, he could never win against his only older sister.
-
Ring. Ring. Ring.
Rin looked at the unknown number and decided to ignore the call.
“Who was that?” Isagi, who was beside him doing yoga, asked him.
“Unknown.”
“What if it’s someone or something important?”
“If it’s so important then I would already have the number saved already, no?”
-
“Rin-” you sobbed (crocodile tears ƪ(˘⌣˘)ʃ), “he really don’t care about me anymore…”
It’s nighttime, and you are in your silk pyjamas still trying to get through Rin to no avail. Sae who is on the sofa highly entertained, listening to your ruckus like it’s a soap opera.
Then it really dawned on you — the realisation that what if Rin really hates you. But you quickly dismissed the idea.
Nah no way~ Rin doesn’t even hate Sae. He’s just being a tsundere, plus, he’s still going through puberty!♪(´ε｀ )
You looked over to Sae and asked him, “How am I supposed to get close to cute little Rin Rin?”
Sae thought to himself about the upcoming U-20 Japan vs Blue Lock match. He was about to suggest to you to watch them play, however, he soon realised that you aren’t just a normal person — you, Miss Top Idol, watching a football match. Let that sink in.
-
-time skip-
Murmurs and excitement filled the stadium on match day.
Although it’s not summer, you dressed in all black — black fedora, black jacket, black pants, black sunglasses and black mask — it was a portable sauna. All that trouble to disguise yourself to not garner attraction.
Breathing heavily under the mask, your sunglasses began to fog up. You swear you looked like the most suspicious person right this second.
Not only that, sweaty spectators were all around you. How could a renowned celebrity like you stand this kind of treatment?
You stared long and hard at the empty football field. Where are they?
This was taking too long and you were starting to get very impatient and uncomfortable.
Slowly you took out your fedora, letting out your silky dark hair to flow out of its restraints.
The next second, you took out your jacket. Underneath was a simple white shirt that revealed your smooth skin.
As the time ticked away, you also took out the mask — that to be very honest, was starting to annoy you, your sunglasses kept getting fogged up! (´°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥ω°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥｀)
Not knowing when the match was going to start, you tapped on the shoulder of the young boy right next to you.
“When is it going to start?”
The young boy turned and felt something stuck in his throat. The moment he laid eyes on you he thought you were a celebrity. Even though the sunglasses were hiding half of your face, he really thought you looked like someone famous.
“E-eh,” he stuttered.
“Eh?” You repeated after him.
“There! They are about to come out!” His attention was immediately drawn to the field.
The roars of the crowd erupted throughout the stadium as U-20 Japan and Blue Lock emerged to the field.
You squinted as hard as possible trying to take a good look at the players.
Sae and Rin then appeared in your line of sight, both of them in different jerseys.
SAE! RIN! You felt yourself feeling more excited than you should.
-
Sae’s eyes course through the crowd to your allotted seat (that he assigned you to). Rin, who was right beside Sae, followed his brother’s line of sight.
Rin found out that his brother was looking at a woman. She was waving at Sae (or someone else, it was hard to tell with the crowd) animatedly. But the more he looked at the woman in sunglasses, the more she looked awfully familiar.
“Sister?” Rin finally spoke up.
Rin momentarily reminisce the days when he would be in the warm embrace of his sister whenever he cried.
But before any sappy sibling reunion, the match between the two brothers was just about to start.
-
Aww~ Rin also grew up so handsomely, and to think he is taller than Sae. You thought to yourself, happy.
As the match went on, you were met with a conundrum. Which team should you be supporting?
When U-20 Japan scored a goal, you cheered. When Blue Lock scored a goal, you cheered.
The young boy beside you was also confused as to who you supported.
The match continued with great intensity. You continued with your cheering in spite of not knowing too much about football.
In the end, Blue Lock won and the crowd went crazy.
You saw Sae talking to Rin in the middle of the field. Sae looked impassive as usual and Rin, you noticed, had an expression on him that caused your elderly sister's instinct to activate.
-
Turns out, what you witnessed was the part where Sae was gassing up Isagi instead of acknowledging Rin’s growth as a striker.
“-and,” Sae continued, “your sister has been calling out for you. Don’t ignore her.”
Rin stared at Sae’s back as he parts from him.
True enough, when he turned back to the crowd, he saw you mouthing his name.
Rin jogged towards your seating area and as he approaches, his right hand rubbed the back of his neck feeling bashful.
-
Up top at the spectator's seat, you saw Rin jogging towards you.
You hasten your steps down the stairs and gave your littlest (and very sweaty) brother the warmest embrace.
“You did great,” you softly whispered.
No matter how big he gets, he is still a kid.
“H-hey, isn’t that the popular idol?” The murmurs in the crowd continued, interrupting your reunion.
The spectators soon became privy to the idol in the stadium.
How did this come to be?
Well, to put it simply, you carelessly took off your last remaining “cover-up” —your sunglasses— in the heat of the moment as soon as the match ended. ˚✧₊⁎❝᷀ົཽ≀ˍ̮ ❝᷀ົཽ⁎⁺˳✧༚
To say the least, the very next day news began pouring out about the Itoshi Siblings.
☆〜（ゝ。∂）the end (for now) ☆〜（ゝ。∂）
<;no pairings yet! *evil laughing* I plan to create a blue lock harem>
Part 2
#claire writes things#blue lock#itoshi sae#rin itoshi#blue lock x y/n#blue lock x you#blue lock x reader#blue lock sae itoshi#itoshi sae x reader#bllk isagi#bllk fluff#bllk headcanons#bllk scenarios#bllk x y/n#bllk sae#bllk x reader#bllk rin#bllk series#blue lock rin itoshi#itoshi brothers#bllk hcs#bllk nagi#blue lock nagi#bllk x you
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Kinkmas - Day 22: Corruption W/ DPR ian
Post Date: 22nd December 2022
Content: Smut - Christian Yu/ DPR ian x Reader
WC: 1.2K
TW?: Friends with benefits/ Corruption/ Fuckboy!Chris/ Inexperienced Reader/ Reader has vulva/ Princess/ Bondage (Rope)
Summary: Of course, he couldn’t help himself from tainting you with his deepest and darkest desires when it’s a season to be good.
Masterlist Kinkmas Masterlist Prompt list
Another friend-holiday Christmas.
Yet this time, it’s just you and Chris, as everyone is all coupled up and being sickly cute with their significant others. Leaving you and Chris to spend the date that was planned, alone together.
This would be a totally innocent friend Christmas date. You're friends - yes, both single but nothing could ever possibly happen, right?
What else better to do on the day than to watch Christmas films that you’ve both seen multiple times before, and try your absolute best to find another to watch that you haven’t seen.
Regardless, none of the options were standing out for you both.
"Fuck this," Chris sighs, throwing the controller onto the coffee table in front of you both after pressing play on a random Christmas film.
You couldn't help but laugh at his sudden frustration, making him side-eye you. Very unimpressed by your reaction to his outburst but that pearly white smile breaks free when he softens up, acknowledging that there was a little comedy to how he went about it.
"So what have you done this week?" You break the ice first after staring into his eyes for a little longer than you expected to, almost getting lost in them as you try and hide your sudden attraction to your friend but this doesn't go a miss by him.
"Oh, nothing really. Just the usual, but I, unfortunately, won't see that girl again. She thinks I was weird for asking her to try something," Chris replies with the most nonchalant face ever.
This was a regular occurrence and you have to be honest, you're never phased when he talks about his experience with girls but you were always curious how he manages to get around like that.
Being relatively inexperienced yourself, you always wonder what it was like to have the chance to be laid by him. It was evident that your interest peaked, fully facing him as you rest your hands in your lap, being ready to fully listen to him whilst the TV plays in the background, "What was it?".
With wide eyes, Chris wasn't expecting you to ask that but is more than happy to share anyway, "I just wanted to try to see how things would pan out if I was in complete control, giving instructions and tying her to the bed. But I guess she wasn't into that stuff".
With every single hair standing up on your body from the slight shyness you're feeling after hearing it, your core starts to ache for attention.
Although, you try to keep yourself composed because you didn't know where you stand with him, "That sounds pretty fun, though!".
Your reply was to sound playful, but the more you look at him, the more you realise that you found yourself being sexually frustrated with him, practically a virgin wanting to be ruined by him.
"Oh yeah? I think it does, we should try it," The teasing in his voice makes your eyes widen to the size of plates as you swallow hard, heart racing until he finishes his sentence, "I'm only joking".
Feeling slightly better but now you feel as though you missed your chance.
It was now or never, make or break the moment as you gain a bit of confidence to get cheeky and playful, "I'm not joking though".
He doesn't even react in a bad way at all, just a smirk extending on his face as he inches closer to you, closing the gap until he's practically hovering over you, "Are you sure you're not joking? Once we start, I don't think I could stop," Chris growls lightly, making you whimper at the sudden change in your friend.
Despite how shy you were, you push through with your confidence, letting him guide you to his bedroom and wait for him to start giving you instructions, just as he'd want.
But not before his lips attach to yours, biting on your bottom lip that gets caught between his teeth and his tongue swipes against yours.
The way he kisses you makes you feel like you're on cloud 9, never would've imagined for it to feel that good but you're in store for the rest.
With gradual movement, his hands slip under your shirt and swiftly removes it from your body.
Remembering what he wants to try, he stops in his tracks as he leans back on his heels, eyes like a predator on you as the smirk just grows even bigger, "Take your clothes off, real slow for me princess".
Doing as you're instructed to do, you can't help but get even hotter to the touch, with slight hesitance in your actions as you remove the items of clothing off of your body, playing them on the floor whilst you await further instructions.
"Turn around, face down and ass up with your hands behind your back, let me see you like that," He growls in a whisper so seductively into your ears, nipping at it before letting you move your body around.
Tying your wrists behind your back and connecting them to your ankles, you hiss at the tightness of the rope, whimpering when he only tightens them a little more and gives your ass a huge smack.
"Look at you, innocent inexperienced you getting tied up. Never thought I'd see the day," He quips, the cocky and teasing voice in full swing as he leans over your back to whisper into your ear again, "You're all mine now, princess".
"Let's see how much of me can you take, huh?" He continues, making you whimper and beg for him to do something with you other than tease you.
But in reality, that just adds more fuel to the fire, making him want to drag this out as long as possible to see how badly you break for him.You sure are innocent, and he knows that.
He knows the very little experience you have, but by god does he want to ruin that innocence that for some reason, you've always tried to hold on to until now? And now, you're never going to want anything, or anyone else.
~
Tags: @scuzmunkie, @ateezreactionsandscenarios, @trashlord-007, @fanfictrashlord-007
#kpop#kpop blog#kpop fanfic#kpop scenarios#kpop imagines#kpop kinkmas#dpr ian fanfic#dpr ian scenarios#dpr ian imagines#dpr ian smut#dpr ian hard hours#christian yu#christian yu smut#christian yu fanfic#christian yu scenarios
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💘 could u do hangman with the valentine's prompt: “see, this is the true meaning of valentine’s day.”₁ “box wine and enough candy to kill a horse?!”₂ “you heard me.”₁
me vs making almost all my hangman requests roommate au’s. pry the trope from my cold dead hands! anyway i had sooo much fun with this one, might be my favorite i’ve written so far hehehe i hope you enjoy as much as me <3 - [1.5k] | join the party!
It was your first Valentine’s Day with Jake but not in the romantic sense, though you heartily wished it was. You kept that to yourself because it was hard enough trying to find a tolerable roommate. Besides, you were almost completely positive that he had plans lined up for the day and they didn’t include you.
You’d prepped by stocking up on a variety of candies at the store and a thing of box wine. It wasn’t much but it was enough for you to indulge in while you ran a marathon of your favorite romantic comedies.
There’s a whole spread of chocolate and other sweets on the coffee table of your shared living room, the box wine close by and your glass already full. The lights are low and you’ve lit one of your favorite candles for the ambience. You’ve cozied up with your favorite blanket and How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days queued up on your TV.
The movie’s just started and you lean back, sprawled on the sofa with your wine glass pressed to your lips. With the volume a little louder than normal and the lights dim, you don’t even notice Jake coming into the room. He stands near the couch, arms crossed with his gaze on the television.
“Oh, I love this movie,” his voice startles you. A yelp escapes you and you jump, grateful your glass isn’t as full as before because it would’ve spilled all over.
“Jesus, Jake!” you scramble to grab your remote and pause the movie. He looks at you completely bewildered. You set your wine glass on the coffee table and finally look at him. You wished you didn’t. Where he should’ve been dressed up for a nice date, he’s instead in those borderline sinful pajama pants of his that drive you insane. It’s your turn to look absolutely confused. “Don’t you have a date tonight or something?”
Jake huffs, his arms falling to his sides. He runs a hand through his hair, the strands sticking up in the wake of his fingers. You try not to stare.
“No, she bailed,” he basically pouts, throwing himself down on the other side of the couch. You pull your feet and blanket back in the nick of time. You stare at him, eyebrows pinched and a small, sympathetic frown on your face. He scoffs lightly, throwing his head against the back of the couch. “Stop that.”
“Stop what? I’m not doing anything-”
“-The sympathetic look, stop it,” your voices overlap, sentences trailing on top of each other. You purse your lips.
“Sorry,” you say, sitting up and criss crossing your legs. His eyes are closed, his hair still somewhat standing up from when he’d run a hand through it. You blink, well aware he can probably sense you practically ogling him. Your gaze darts to the abundance of candy and the wine you bought. “You can hang out with me.”
He peeks an eye open, his head turning just the slightest bit for him to look at you. “Your pity party?”
It’s your turn to scoff. You lean across the couch to slap his arm and he bites back a grin. “It’s not a pity party.”
“Looks like one,” he retorts and you roll your eyes.
“Whatever, you can go pout in your room then,” you say, reaching towards the table and grabbing your wine glass. You lift it to your lips to sip from it, mumbling against it. “Didn’t wanna share with you anyway.”
“I am not pouting,” he says over your mumbling. You raise your eyebrows at him over your glass, nodding at his folded arms and the obvious pouty expression on his face.
He groans, rolling his eyes though he doesn’t mean it. Honestly, Jake’s rather fond of you though he tries not to let it on too much. Being roommates was a great arrangement for the two of you…if you took away all the moments where he wanted to grab you by the waist and plant one on you. Moments like tonight when he’d found you drinking wine and watching a romcom on the couch in your pajamas.
“Pass me a chocolate,” he sighs, relenting to sharing the night with you. You can’t help but smile with a silent cheer. He watches you throw the blanket off of you as you get up from the couch. The wine in your glass sloshes when you set it down.
“I’ll grab you a glass!” you call as you head towards the kitchen. An entirely too soft, enamored smile falls onto his face as he watches you go. You fill his glass and yours when you come back. He offers to hold yours while you get situated back on the couch and you let him.
You sit rather than sprawl this time and toss your blanket over both of your laps before playing the movie again and taking your glass from Jake. As it turns out, How to Lose a Guy is immeasurably more enjoyable watching it with Jake. It seems your entire night is the same way spending it with him instead of alone.
The two of you have emptied the box wine into your glasses and eaten your way through a hefty portion of your candy supply by the time Matthew McConaughey is chasing down Kate Hudson’s taxi on the bridge. A quiet, almost wistful sigh escapes you when he kisses her.
Once the credits have rolled, neither of you make much of a move to choose another movie. You’re both a little tipsy, leaning towards wine drunk at this point. Jake’s content to just sit and talk to you all night. He’s convinced he’s never had a better holiday than this one.
“See,” you lean forward from your spot on the couch to grab another piece of foil wrapped chocolate. “This is the true meaning of Valentine’s Day,” you unwrap the chocolate and pop it into your mouth. The foil wrapping gets crumbled and tossed onto the coffee table. Jake snorts.
“Box wine and enough candy to kill a horse?” he asks, voice a little sarcastic as he grabs his wine glass. You nod, swallowing down your chocolate.
“You heard me,” you say, picking up your own glass and drinking the last bit of wine left in your glass. His is still half full and you realize for a moment he might be a touch more sober than you are. At some point during the movie, you’d scooted closer to each other on the couch. So much so that his arm brushes against yours as he leans forward to set his wine glass down. He takes your empty one with it.
Jake sits up, angling his body towards yours with his elbow resting along the back of the couch. You mirror his position, your head leaning against your palm. He smiles at you, nudges your leg with his foot.
“Thanks for letting me crash your pity party,” he says and you roll your eyes again. A coy smile takes over your face, giving you away.
“I told you it wasn’t a pity party,” you all but groan. He laughs a little and you’re only semi-aware of his face shifting closer to yours. His eyes dart to your lips and back up, so quick you blink and almost miss it.
“Was way more fun spending it with you,” his voice has gotten softer, a little huskier though that could just be from the wine. Your lips soften into a small smile, your gaze falling to your lap briefly. A shyness seems to take hold of you.
“Yeah?” you breathe out, looking back up at him. He nods once, a low hum hanging in his throat. You’re not sure which one of you makes the first initial move. At first, you think it was Jake but in actuality, you realize it might’ve been you.
Your face had surged forward, your lips meeting his in a slow kiss. His hand not on the back of the couch lifts up to hold the side of your face. You lean into it, your head tilting as the kiss seems to deepen. He tastes like chocolate and box wine. The corners of your lips curve up slightly and your arm that’d been supporting your head comes to wrap around his neck.
You’re leaning against him, borderline sitting in his lap at this point. It hardly registers in your mind that you’re making out on the couch with your roommate of all people. In every scenario you’d run through tonight, you hadn’t anticipated this being the outcome.
Jake pulls back, lips a little swollen and slick. You’re sure yours are the same, your chest heaving against his. It’s quiet, the only sounds being your labored breathing. He looks at you with something close to a smirk on his face.
“Maybe that was the true meaning of Valentine’s Day,” he jokes and you laugh in spite of yourself. He can’t help but press his lips back to yours, swallowing the sound of your laughter. You find yourself falling in love with the feeling of his grin pressed against yours.
#jake seresin#jake hangman seresin#hangman#jake seresin x reader#jake hangman seresin x reader#hangman x reader#jake seresin fluff#jake hangman seresin fluff#hangman fluff#jake seresin blurb#hangman blurb#📝: a writes!#allie's valentine's house party <3#allie's vday party blurbs!
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If it’s possible I’d like to do a request for the “My Favorite Henderson” verse…with the romance 💙 prompts 12, 37, and 44… and maybe one from the comedy prompts…if they make sense together. Again you’re awesome!! I love this series.
i’m still allowing requests for this series, so request away guys xx
MY FAVOURITE
HENDERSON
PART SIX
fandom: stranger things
parings: eddie x f henderson reader
warnings: swearing
12: “can I kiss you?”
37: “you still haven’t asked me on a date.”
44: “your lips are so soft I could kiss them all day.”
masterlist
It was no lie that Eddie Munson liked you. He made it clear as day every time he saw you, but that flirtatious goofy side of him was reserved for only the comfort of your house. At school the pair of you didn’t talk, in fact Eddie didn’t go anywhere near you.
You assumed it was because of the people you hung out with. You were a cheerleader, you were popular and you spent your day surrounded by people that he hated. In fact, he once hated you, that was until he got to know you and got comfortable around you.
But you were the same, you thought he was a freak, that’s what all your friends called him. You were conditioned into thinking that way. But now whenever someone spoke badly of him you shut them down and sure they started to question you, but you never told them the truth. You could never tell them of the crush that you had on Eddie.
So when you found a note stuffed inside your locker, signed by Eddie, telling you to meet him at his van once school was over you were a little shocked. Pleasantly surprised if you will and now here you were seated in the passenger seat behind the school where nobody would find you.
“Why did you really ask me here?” You asked, looking over at him.
“So we could get some alone time away from Dustin, so we wouldn’t be interrupted,” Eddie replied. “So we can finally do what we’re both longing to do.”
You scoffed, giving him a dirty look. “You still haven’t asked me on a date,” you replied, hands crossing over your chest.
Eddie smiled. “Is this not a date?” He asked.
“Sitting in your van behind the school? No Eddie, this is not a date,” you answered. “This is just you trying to fuck me.”
Eddie laughed, “you’re feisty. I like it.” You rolled your eyes, looking away from him. “If it’s a date you want then it’s a date you’ll get,” Eddie replied, turning on the engine and driving off. You quickly buckled up your seatbelt, watching the outside world as he drove.
He pulled up at the park and the two of you got out of his van, going for a walk around the green. You both talked, getting to know each other even more. He was asking you hard questions, as if he was trying to see deep into the darkest parts of your soul and you were answering him honestly.
The both of you sat at nearby bench, watching the ducks float around the pond. You spoke quickly, hands moving around as you did. It was a quirk of yours and Eddie thought it was adorable how your hands couldn’t sit still as long as you were talking.
“Can I kiss you?” He asked, cutting you off mid sentence. Your eyes snapped onto his. “It’s just us now, no Dustin here to stop us. Don’t you think we should finally take advantage of this opportunity?”
You smiled slightly. “Yes, you can kiss me,” you replied.
Eddie grinned at your words, hands making their way to your cheeks as he pulled your face towards his. Finally, his lips connected with yours. Butterflies exploded in your stomach at the feeling. Chapped and rough skin against the soft of your lips. His tongue dragged across your bottom lip and instinctively you opened your mouth, allowing him explore every crevice.
You shuffled closer to him, hands gripping onto the fabric of his Hellfire shirt, arching your back into him as one of his hands moved to the back of your head, holding your lips against his. It was like now that it had finally happened, now that you had finally kissed, neither of you wanted to let go. You wanted to bask in this moment and that you did.
He pulled away and you frowned, already missing the feeling. “Your lips are so soft I could kiss them all day,” Eddie flirted. You smiled at him, hands wrapping around his neck as you pecked at him once more.
“I’ve waited forever for that to happen,” you admitted, your eyes boring into his.
“Me too,” he replied before pushing his lips against yours once more.
The pair of you were making out rather aggressively, as if your life depended on it, as if at any given moment everything could be ruined.
And because things could never be that simple, everything was ruined.
“Y/N, Eddie?”
You groaned against Eddie’s lips, pulling away to see you brother stood with his friends, Mike and Lucas, shock clear on all three of their faces at the sight they were seeing. Eddie Munson, leader of Hellfire Club, making out with Y/N Henderson, the cheerleader.
“What are you doing here?!” Eddie practically yelled.
“We came here to hang out, what are you guys doing here?!” Dustin replied, angrily, looking between the two of you.
You looked down at your lap. “I brought Y/N here so we could have some peace from you!” Eddie yelled in return.
“That’s my sister, dude,” Dustin shook his head. “What is wrong with you?”
You stood up, brushing down your cheerleading dress. “I’m gunna go,” you said.
“Let me drive you home,” Eddie replied, grabbing your hand. You looked down at him with a smile, the both of you staring at each other with longing eyes, neither of you saying a word for a few seconds, until Dustin cleared his throat. Reminding the both of you that he was right there.
You rolled your eyes, glancing over at your brother. “I think I should probably walk,” you said. Eddie sighed, letting go of you and you bid him a goodbye. You glared at Dustin before stalking off.
Eddie stood up also. “You, Henderson, ruin everything,” Eddie said before walking away.
Dustin scoffed, shaking his head. “Can you guys believe this?” Dustin asked his friends. “They are always doing stuff like this, going behind my back.”
“Would it be that bad if they got together?” Mike asked. “I mean Eddie would be your brother in law.”
“Yes, because every time I look at him that thought will always be lingering in the back of my mind,” Dustin replied.
“What thought?” Lucas asked.
“That he’s doing my sister!”
© luvfae 2022
#stranger things#netflix#eddie munson#eddie munson x you#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson fluff#dustin henderson#my favourite henderson
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random sentence prompts
━ from various tv shows, part 3
if you’ve got something good, that just means someone wants to take it, right?
i am not gonna watch that happen again.
i like rules. they bring order to the chaos.
you’re my favorite person in the world, but you’re acting weird.
i don’t want to be anyone’s hero. i just want to be safe and boring and happy.
we did so many bad things. it’s all burnt in my brain.
i know that i am flawed, but i am trying to be better.
if you think i’m a killer, prove it.
i’m, like, perpetually single.
no one in the world had more reasons not to believe in me, but you still did.
everyone expects me to have it all together, but i just don’t.
i don’t care what other people think about me. your opinion is the only one that mattered.
if you’re always a disappointment, then it’s impossible to disappoint.
i got so wrapped up in my own dreams and feelings. i took what we had for granted.
what we are to each other is so much more complicated than any stupid wife or husband or girlfriend.
it’s too much for me, you needing me.
i want us to go back. back before the mistakes, the lies. back to when we were unstoppable.
i guess all the time i feel like i’m kind of trapped because i can’t describe how i’m feeling.
you deserve better than me.
everyone keeps saying the only thing that will make this better is time and maybe space.
i didn’t want you to leave last night.
got to clear the skies for some blue skies, right?
i just don’t want to get hurt again.
everything’s still unresolved, you know?
nobody deserves romance more than you.
i don't know when i'm going to get over this. but i want to be beside you when that day comes.
is it cold in here, or is it just me?
i’ll get blamed if something bad happens to you.
i’ve got one rule for you. dance with me.
why is this so hard?
can we keep having dramatic yet memorable dates?
if you tell me right now that you’ll never forgive me until the end of time, i’ll leave you alone.
i’m not the problem. you are.
you two are weird in all the same ways.
forget other people’s definitions. be who you want to be.
if i love you now, imagine how much i’ll love the person you become?
i just don’t see it adding up to happiness for any of us.
i kind of felt like you were running away from me.
i’m not a stranger. i’m just strange.
every time i do something to be happy, someone gets hurt.
all year, i’ve tried to do the right thing, but what do i get in return?
you strike me as a queen without her crown.
we’ll always find our way back to each other.
what’s the point of fighting so hard to stay alive if we’re just going to die alone?
you know there’s a chance. that’s what you can’t square. that’s what hurts.
things went bad for you, things went bad for me.
it’s not that i’m like you. it’s that i love you.
i’m losing my fucking mind, and i’m terrified.
you knocked me off balance in a good way.
he knew what to do. he always did. and he was a fucking asshole about it.
you should get the hell away from me. i’m poison. i ruin people.
you sound like a bad romantic comedy.
i think we can make long distance work.
you’re not a victim. you’re a killer.
i know kids lie to their parents about stuff, but you don’t do that. it’s not you.
you can come back from this. i know you can. you have to.
people die, they become a threat.
you’re either the cat or the mouse.
when you go down, i hope i’m there to see it.
we’ve always needed each other. that’s what our entire relationship’s been about.
i’m not evil. i just did an evil thing, one i deeply regret.
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𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐘 𝐆𝐈𝐋𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐄 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒 .
from the 1996 film by adam sandler . swearing present .
“ i’m stupid , you’re smart . ”
“ i was wrong , you were right . ”
“ you’re the best , i’m the worst . ”
“ you’re very good looking , i’m not attractive . ”
“ it’s all in the hips . ”
“ just tap it in . ”
“ give it a little tappy . tap tap taparoo . ”
“ what ? friends listen to ‘endless love’ in the dark . ”
“ now you’ve had enough , bitch . ”
“ why don’t you just go home ? ”
“ answer me ! ”
“ mister ! mister ! get me outta here ! ”
“ you suck , ya jackass ! ”
“ now you will go to sleep or i will put you to sleep . ”
“ if i saw myself in clothes like that i’d have to kick my own ass . ”
“ i eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast . ”
“ you eat pieces of shit for breakfast ? ”
“ oh well , now your back’s gonna hurt , ‘cause you just pulled landscaping duty . ”
“ you could trouble me for a warm glass of shut the hell up . ”
“ you’re gonna die now , clown ! ”
“ the price is wrong , bitch . ”
“ you’re gonna need a blanket and suntan lotion , ‘cause you’re never gonna get off that beach . ”
“ what ? i didn’t break it . i was just testing its durability .”
“ you little son of a bitch ball ! ”
“ but she’s an old lady . i mean , look at her . she’s old . you can’t just take her stuff , she’s too old . ”
“ damned alligator just popped up , cut me down on my prime . ”
“ lots of pressure . you’ve gotta rise above it . you’ve got to hardness in the good energy , block out the bad ! ”
“ some might call it luck . i like to call it , well , luck i guess . so what ? ”
“ did that go in ? i wasn’t watching , did it go in ? i didn’t see it . could you tell me if it went in ? ”
“ i’d love to punch that guy in the face right now . but i can’t , you know , because i’d get in trouble . ”
“ you’re a lousy kindergarten teacher . i’ve seen those finger-paintings you bring home and they suck . ”
“ you were great out there today , but not that great . a lot of that was luck . ”
“ i got into this tournament for one reason : money . and now i have a new reason : kicking your ass ! ”
“ nah , it looks that way ‘cause you’ve only got one shoe on . ”
“ that’s my puck , baby . don’t ever touch my puck ! ”
“ damn alligator bit my hand off ! ”
“ i think i just killed that mister . ”
“ you know who else could draw a crowd ? a golfer with an arm growing out of his ass . ”
“ oh you can count . good for you . ”
“ holy shit . talk about your all time backfires . ”
“ you’re acting like a damn fool ! ”
“ you know what’s driving me crazy ? you’re not getting the ball in the hole ! ”
“ just easing the tension , baby . ”
“ what’s this i hear about you breaking a rake and throwing it in the woods ? ”
“ just stay out of my way or you’ll pay . ”
“ i thought we were going to be just friends ? ”
“ here ! eat that and leave us alone . ”
“ i was just looking for the other half of this bottle . ”
“ i don’t want a piece of you . i want the whole thing ! ”
“ somebody’s closer . ”
“ take one more step , i burn the house and piss on the ashes . ”
“ spoken like a true asshole . ”
“ he shouldn’t have been standing there . ”
“ don’t push me ! now’s not the time . ”
“ piece of monkey shit ! ”
“ do you know what the pathetic thing is ? you have been doing this your whole life . ”
“ fine . do whatever you like . what would i know ? i’m just a doctor . ”
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An Ask Game for Writers to Procrastinate Working on Your WIP(s)
thank you kindly for tagging me @shrekgogurt @youarenevertooold, and @monbons i've been seeing this game make its rounds on my dash and was really hoping someone would pull me in!
🦈 Tell us the name of one of your WIP(s)
my main three wips at the moment are without sun, ballad of the final sparrow, which is more commonly known as bitverse, and fragile things (and how to break them), but i've also been fucking around a bit the last two or three weeks with a new (terrible, evil, very self-indulgent) wip called god-forbid.
🍄 Describe one of your WIPs in the format of “___ + ___ =___”
i think i might be dumb bc i don't understand this question at all.
🌍 What tags or warnings will your WIP(s) need if you intend to share it?
bitverse: heavy angst, psychological horror elements, alcohol abuse, allusions to suicide, unhealthy coping mechanisms, dead dove: do not eat.
🧭 An alternative title to one of your WIP(s)?
ballad of the final sparrow -> baz is typing
fragile things (and how to break them) -> there's a werewolf in london
god-forbid -> the gap between a tragedy and comedy
⚠️ Which WIP you’re most likely to finish or update next?
i have no idea. i mean, you'd think the answer would be without sun since it's the only fic i actually have posted at the moment, but unfortunately i am an untrustworthy villain.
💾 What is the document of your WIP called? (Not the story title, but what you’ve saved it as.)
same as the fic title. if i start a new wip and don't know what to call it, i'll pick something at random and add (working title) at the end.
🖍 Post any sentence from your WIP
from without sun:
“You don’t like peppermint,” he says.
But maybe she does. Maybe that’s one more thing he can add to his growing list of things he got wrong about Agatha Wellbelove.
No. 1 — Dislikes peppermint; actually, she is quite fond of it.
No. 2 — Likes Simon Snow; him, not so much.
♻️ A scrapped idea for your current WIP
one of the biggest changes i made to the plot of without sun really early on was penelope's role in the story. i had a clear idea of the story i wanted to tell as soon as i saw the prompt for the fic. without sun was always supposed to be about more than simon and baz. the story is about grief and love, and the space we take up in the lives of the people around us. but n e way, in my orig draft, penny was actually supposed to be able to communicate with simon a bit, and there was gonna be a whole sect of scenes in the middle of the fic where they sat around together trying to break simon's curse what we know and what we don't know style via passing notes. i ended up tossing this idea really quickly tho, and i'm glad i did bc one of my favourite moments i've ever written in any fic happens in chapter two of without sun and it belongs to simon and penny.
🤔 What’s a story you’d love to write but haven’t even started yet?
so many. or, well—what counts as "haven't even started"? i hate to let ideas sit around in my head bc it feels like leaving raspberries in the fridge for too long, like that shit is gonna get mould on it, so usually the first thing i do is rough out a few scenes and/or script out a very rough outline of the plot (like this / this / this style) so that i have something to come back to later. i have dozens of zero drafts just lying tf around. but otherwise, yeah, so many. one big idea i have is called heart on fire and it's based on fanart, but i haven't started it yet bc obvs i wanna get permission from the artist first but i've been holding off reaching out to them about it until i've knocked a few of my less intimidating longfics off my wip list bc heart on fire is gonna fucking hefty so i don't wanna give'r until i'm sure i can manage it.
🤡 How many WIPs are you actively working on?
LMFAO
🛠 Is there a scene or anything in the WIP you are struggling with right now?
i'm having a real bitch of a time with agatha's main scene in chapter two of without sun, i've been fighting with it on and off for months, but i can't get it to do what i want it to do.
❤️ Not a question, just a second kudos to send.
cheers!
sorry for any doubles but, tagging: @drowninginships @cosmicalart @that-disabled-princess @fatalfangirl @cutestkilla @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @artsyunderstudy @thewholelemon @roomwithanopenfire @hushed-chorus @blackberrysummerblog @imagineacoolusername @nightimedreamersworld @prettygoododds @confused-bi-queer @mooncello and an open tag for anybody else who wants to procrastinate their wips!
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The Lone Gunmen Sentences
(Sentences from The Lone Gunmen (2001). Adjust phrasing where needed)
"Without proof, we're nothing more than conspiracy mongers."
"He was a good man. He had a conscience. Sometimes, that's a problem in our line of work."
"If he was murdered, there would have to be a reason for it. Maybe he knew something?"
"What is this? Another one of your whacko conspiracy theories?"
"All I'm saying is, make peace with your father another way."
"What the hell are you doing? Why can't you stay out of this?"
"Don't be so damn naïve!"
"Congrats on not being dead."
"I see myself in you."
"I see now that you've got something I never had."
"Well, aren't you going to invite me in?"
"Late for a secret meeting?"
"I've got to say, so far this job sucks!"
"You're thinking with your heart, not your head."
"Have you got a girl in there?"
"I assure you, we are neither slapping nor tickling!"
"Is that how you were brought up? To be filthy?"
"Why am I even talking to you?"
"Is it even possible for you to know what's going on?"
"People never see history coming. It kind of just sneaks up on them."
"Do you ever think about dinosaurs?"
"Your father was a great man."
"You really are an oaf. You know that?"
"I'm so impressed. I really thought you'd be all thumbs at this fatherhood business."
"You do know that it's quite a turn on when a man shows himself so capable?"
"You can't tell the difference between fantasy and reality."
"There's something not right when science gets in the way of love."
"I'll be flossing chunks of your scalp from my teeth if you don't tell me right this second what you're on about."
"The whole world is a cage when you're trapped in it alone."
"You know, call me crazy, but I'm starting to think that Elvis really is dead."
"Guess what? It seems as though I've been in some sort of accident!"
"You remember, don't you? Please tell me you remember!"
"If you can't trust your doctor, who can you trust?"
"I had no idea you were so creative!"
"All I want is for you to stay and dance with me."
"Is there a woman alive that hasn't been hurt by a man before?"
"What are you talking about? I don't have any secrets!"
"I need to know everything you know, and I need to know who else knows it."
"Lesbian? I thought you said Lebanese!"
#rp meme#rp memes#roleplay meme#roleplay memes#rp prompts#roleplay prompts#sentence starters#specific;#crime drama;#filmtv;#xfiles;#the lone gunmen;#supernatural drama;#comedy drama;
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{♡} 4k followers special ; CLOSED!
Hello everyone! On the occasion of 4000 followers at my account, I decided to make a small special! This is a ‘Quote Prompts Special’ where the sentences will have an impact on the plots! Some of them will be SFW or suggestive and some will be NSFW! I hope you all will like my ideas just like before! I was doing something quite similar around the time I hit 1000 followers i.e. ‘Kissing Prompts’! For a next month (August) I will receive your requests and write them one by one :)
I. How to send a request?
Choose the number and one character you like (if the prompt looks like it has two or more characters then add more than one name). You can also give me your pronouns (if you don’t, I’ll write the story in neutral form!). Also! The examples below are just examples. You can write which ones you are interested in or leave me the right to choose. When it comes to NSFW prompts, you can tell me what you definitely don’t want to see!
for example: ‘10 + Poseidon from RoR + pregnant female reader’ or ‘ 33 with Sakura Haruno and reader with he/they prns’ or ‘Dio Brando and Joseph Joestar plus 53 but without cheating’
{!} Then send your request to my request/ask box.
II. Please be patient! I will write each request one by one.
{!!} Also, here are my Masterlist and MyAnimeList account to see what I would like to write! I am happy to write about characters who don’t have their lists yet, such as ‘Yakusoku no Neverland’, ‘Beastars’, ‘number24’, ‘Oshi no Ko’, ‘Kaguya-sama: Love is War’, ‘Blue Lock’, ‘Vanitas no Karte’ or anything else rated higher than 5 on my MAL.
sfw prompts;
for example – fluff, comedy, crack fic, school/college!au, kid!fic or family!fic and also pet!fic, isekai, turning into a child or animal, royalty, cute romance, friendship, idols or streamers or models!au (etc.), internet friends/lovers, flower/coffee shop!au, enemies/friends to lovers, love at the first sight, soulmates!au (colors, tattoos, red thread), song!fic, pranking someone, sharing a bed, staring at the stars, date!au, soft angst (like first quarrel, misunderstanding, wrong number), mention of crying, pregnancy/marriage, gender swap, [...]
1. “Let’s watch some movies from Studio Ghibli (or Disney, or Pixar)!”
2. “... Do you want to stay with me for the night?”
3. “Are we gonna fight? Like fist to fist or rather... lips to lips?”
4. “Shut up, I’m listening to Big Time Rush.”
5. “... but I love your sister/brother.”
6. “Haven’t we met before?”
7. “You’re so dumb!”
“No? You’re dumb.”
8. “Bring your ass over here. I wanna some cuddles (or kisses).”
9. “Why did you do that?”
10. “I’d kill for you.”
11. “I– I like both of you...”
12. “But we are not married.”
“Then marry me.”
13. “Look into my eyes and tell me that you’re not lying. Do it, I am waiting.”
14. “Need some help, shortie?”
15. “Wow, I didn’t know that you could play on the instrument.”
16. “I haven’t been feeling well for the past few days...”
17. “The princess/prince shouldn’t wait, you know?”
18. “I have some good news and some bad news too...”
19. “I’m pregnant.”
20. “Why are not you listening to me?
... I’m very lucky to have you, you know?”
suggestive prompts;
for example – romance, making out, soft smut (including first time, masturbation, oral sex, body worship, general vanilla, etc.), angst, single parent or orphan!au, supernatural things (like demons, vampires, werewolves, zombies, fairies, etc.), dysphoria & misgendering, -shaming in general, diseases (like ed, amnesia, hanahaki), lovers to friends/enemies, mention of blood/vomit/faint, miscarriage, fake relationship, tattoos and piercing, bruises and scars on body, domestic or relationship violence, alcohol consumption, sexual harassment, [...]
21. “You’re drunk.”
“... But you’re drunk too.”
22. “You’re so ugly.”
“Yeah, I know that.”
23. “This is my b-blood?”
23. “Goodbye.”
24. “I’m a monster! Can’t you see it?!”
25. “It’s just a prank! Stop, please!”
26. “It’s not that I hate you, but if you were on fire and I had a bottle of water, I would drink that stupid water.”
27. “You look beautiful. This color suits you so well.”
28. “Stop being a brat.”
29. “Please! Please, don’t leave me!”
30. “Stop talking such nonsense, it’s not true!”
31. “Don’t cry.”
32. “Its all my fault...”
33. “Let’s stay like this forever, please.”
34. “Don’t touch me!”
35. “Haha, look at them. What a freak!”
36. “Your partner won’t catch us... What are you afraid of?”
37. “I don’t think they love me anymore.”
38. “You love flowers, right?
Yes... I love flowers very much.”
39. “No! It hurts, stop, please!”
40. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
nsfw prompts;
for example – hard angst, death (including suicide, murder, accident), mental illness, hard smut (including normal sex, non-con/rape or dub-con, hurt-comfort; 69, size kink, voyeurism, breeding, food play, etc.), ons, bdsm, threesome or gang bang, sex pollen, public or semi-public sex, cheating, manipulation or grooming, age-gap, police!au and law court!au, general abuse, a/b/o, gore or horror, monsters, guns and illegal racing, drugs or alcohol abuse, other triggers, [...]
41. “Of course. I am yours. Only yours.”
42. “... You wanna fuck me so bad it makes you look stupid.”
43. “It was an a-accident, I swear...”
44. “Do you have anything else to say, fuckdoll?”
45. “Should I fuck you? So beg for it.”
46. “I hate myself, you, this life and everything else!”
47. “Yes, I did it on purpose. Any problem?”
48. “They were such a good person. Too bad they died.”
49. “I told you this is how it ends.”
50. “S-Stop. Someone is looking at us.”
51. “Maybe in the next life we will be in love. Who knows?”
52. “I’m so scared. I don’t want to die.”
53. “Wanna join?”
54. “I’ll kill you next time.”
55. “You really think someone like me would love someone like you?”
56. “It was my sister/brother!”
57. “What the fuck are you two doing?!”
58. “Please, leave me alone. Stop... Stop...”
59. “I wonder why they did it.”
60. “See? Not everything is like in a fairy tale.”
navi | status | masterlist | rules | ko-fi
#— 📌#quote prompts#prompts challenge#4k followers#4k special#4k challenge#record of ragnarok x reader#shuumatsu no valkyrie x reader#haikyuu!! x reader#knb x reader#saiki k. x reader#blue lock x reader#tokyo ghoul x reader#genshin impact x reader#hxh x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#death note x reader#noragami x reader#jojo bizarre adventure x reader#bungou stray dogs x reader#yuukoku no moriarty x reader#assassination classroom x reader#kuroshitsuji x reader#fmab x reader#naruto x reader#snk x reader#x reader
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Mst3k quotes
#quotes#mine#mst3k quotes#mst3k#mystery science theater 3000#comedy#writing prompt#prompts#writing inspiration#writing inspo#sentence starter#starters#funny#lol
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hi!! im absolutely astounded at the amount of depth and heart thats in all your fics, and im also very floored at the amount at which you write—im at a cross between admiration and maybe jealously lol!! I wanted to ask, are there any fic of yours (sandman or not) that you think are underrated/deserves more attention?? super excited for everything you ever write!!
asdfg anon thank you <3 So I have a Problem where I have a lot of anxiety about what I create, and when that's writing, if I am not writing The Next Great Novel, then I need to sate the brain demons SOMEHOW, and writing a LOT is the easiest way to do that. I want very badly to please people, and fortunately it's not a hardship for me to write the amount that i do, though I AM trying to consciously like. Take breaks if I need? Take a night off? Keep it healthy looool. But that I'm able to write things that people are consistently finding value and meaning in is a continuous and beautiful marvel to me so thank you, thank you very much!!!
So I read your second part of the ask wrong at first and had gathered uh several fics which I think are underrated that are NOT mine
One Half of a Whole by @violetequus8 - Absolutely REMARKABLE post-apocalyptic literature. Equus captures an entire world and history in 4000 words. There are sentences in this fic that rewrote my brain chemistry.
The entire like this slumber that creeps to me series by @tobrokenstone - THIS. This is survival the way I fucking LOVE IT. Bleak, stark, hard decisions, lasting consequences, surprisingly tender cannibalism (this last may be...specific to me and a few select others lol)
Once again repping the point-set-triangulation series by therm0dynamics, which is singlehandedly the series that got me into Hob/The Corinthian (it's about MIRRORS it's about PARALLELS)
And at this point I realized that you'd asked about which of MY fics I think are underrated, and I was just so caught up in the thought of repping my friends that I lived in a world where I did not write for a moment loool
Salt and Rye is the result of a prompt on tumblr. I wanted to try and capture that feeling of recreating a parent or grandparent's recipe and failing, because it's SUCH a disheartening moment, but I wanted to make it lighter, because Hob has someone there to share the comedy of it with him.
Here there be dragons is my latest fic in the Siren AU and I do think that people who aren't into scifi in general will be more likely to give it a pass, but I'm very proud of it, and very proud of the emotions it evoked in ME, and I promise it's not hard scifi like The Martian or even really pervasive scifi like Star Trek! I just tried to think realistically about what our planet would look like and feel like in 1500 years, and how we might need to leave it. Also, Dream's still a carnivorous octopus man.
an act of faith is the vampire fever dream that struck me at like 3pm on a Saturday and I blacked out for like two hours and this was what I'd written during that time. I enjoy writing obscene levels of devotion and you can't really get much more obscene than "willing to tempt death year after year even though no one's asked you to in order to prove to YOURSELF that your lover loves you"
Honestly I don't think many of my fics are underrated! They're all written at different points in my development and my understanding of myself as a writer, and they range pretty widely in terms of theme and genre sometimes, so some, statistically, are going to be kind of niche! And that's okay! I guess the only thing I'd say is that even if you think something isn't your jam, unless the tags are specifically triggering you give it a try! The worst thing that'll happen is you get a paragraph in and then back out again. An extremely smart person (it was @xx-vergil-xx <3) recently said something along the lines that part of healthy interacting with art is also knowing when to put it down, but it's also important to give different things a chance so that you learn more about yourself and your preferences. I myself am trying to expose myself to and write more angst? Because it makes me deeply uncomfortable to do so! But that's a valuable feeling to know and recognize! Idk i just think we all get different stuff out of writing and it's just nice that I've been able to provide something to so many people <3
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