#but let me have this one dorky series alright
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rizzless sukuna pt 4
part 1 | part 2 | part 3
at long last!!! it's here, im back!
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It’s been about two weeks since Sukuna had his date with Megumi. His mood is the best it’s been in awhile; the change is enough for his parents to notice. When they try questioning him about it, he brushes them off with an easily crafted lie. He’s not quite ready to tell them that he’s possibly dating his younger brother’s best friend (who they almost consider their own son at this point).
Sukuna isn’t ashamed or anything. He knows that his parents wouldn’t give a flying fuck if he told them he isn't straight, but he also didn't think it necessary to tell them anything. Who cares? It isn’t anyone’s business but his own. They’ll figure it out when Sukuna brings Megumi as his date to dinner or something. The idea alone gives him butterflies and he scowls at himself.
He and Megumi have been texting back and forth nearly nonstop since their date. Well, nonstop in the sense that he talks to Megumi more than anyone else, which only happens to be his brother and Maki. Sukuna has never been one to hold a conversation (which was obvious during their date), but there’s something about Megumi that makes Sukuna want to talk. He wants the conversation to keep going. Every time it drops, he finds himself picking it back up again, usually with a movie related question.
Megumi still questions the fact that Sukuna says that he is not a movie buff simply due to the amount of movies that the older boy has seen. The more Megumi mentions it, the more Sukuna starts to believe it himself and he curses his younger brother’s effect on him, not that he’d ever admit it to Megumi or Yuuji.
At the moment, the two of them are arguing over who is better: The Joker or Loki.
Raisin Boy: Idk I think that Joker could outmatch Loki
Sukuna's jaw drops and his thumbs furiously tap away at the screen, not listening to whatever Yuuji is saying to him. He's in the middle of an important argument!
’There's no way. Loki has Joker beat 100 times over! He’s taken punches from Thor and The Hulk, and he has magic. There's nothing the Joker could do to Loki!’
He huffs and drops his phone onto his leg, crossing his arms over his chest as he waits for Megumi's reply.
“What’s got your panties in a twist?” Yuuji asks, briefly glancing at his brother before looking back to the screen so that he can dodge an attack.
Sukuna shakes his head and scoffs, “Your shitty gaming skills. You still haven't beaten this boss?”
The younger boy grunts. He stays quiet for a moment as he concentrates before he replies, “His spinning maneuver that he does always catches me off guard.”
Another beat of silence stretches between them and Sukuna momentarily forgets about his little argument with Megumi as he watches Yuuji rolling around on the screen. He manages a few hits on the boss character before ultimately meeting his doom when he goes into his spin attack and kills Yuuji’s character immediately.
Yuuji huffs and slumps back against the couch in defeat. “See what I mean?”
“Gimme that,” Sukuna grumbles. Reaching over, he snatches the controller out of his brother’s hands. He leans forward and rests his elbows on his knees (his ‘boss fighting position’ as Yuuji has appropriately named it).
The only sounds in the living room are the sound of Sukuna’s fingers rapidly hitting buttons on the controller and Yuuji’s gasps in surprise. He sits up with wide eyes as he watches Sukuna effortlessly fight this boss character that Yuuji has been struggling with for about a week now. Of course, leave it to Sukuna to pick up on Yuuji’s slack.
When Sukuna’s phone dings, his concentration goes out the window and he glances down at his phone to see who the message is from. A bad decision on Sukuna’s part because within that same second, his character dies from a large attach from the boss, leaving Yuuji’s character defeated once again.
“Wh—Sukuna!” Yuuji groans. “You almost had it!”
Sukuna shrugs and tosses the controller back to his brother. He picks up his phone with a shrug, unlocking it to read Megumi’s message. “Sucks.”
Yuuji stares at his older brother for a long moment, taking in the expression on his face. There isn’t a smile per se, but he notices the way Sukuna’s features seem to relax when he reads the message he just got. It makes Yuuji raise an eyebrow in intrigue. Who could he be talking to that would earn just barely a hint of a smile from Sukuna?
He leans over, trying to peer at Sukuna’s screen, curiosity getting the better of him. “Who are you talking to?” Yuuji asks.
The older boy’s trance is broken at the sound of Yuuji’s voice and whatever “smile” was on his face falls immediately and he narrows his eyebrows at his brother. “What?” he asks, instinctively leaning away from Yuuji.
“You never just lose a boss battle because someone texted you. Who is it?” Yuuji asks again, a shit-eating grin on his face and he leans even closer to try and get another look at Sukuna’s phone.
Sukuna scoffs and shoves Yuuji away roughly. “None of your damn business.”
“Well it has to be someone!”
“Yeah, I’m asking the adoption agency if they’ll take you back if we still have the receipt.”
“I wasn’t even adopted!”
Sukuna raises an eyebrow. “Are you sure about that? I’m hot and you’re…” He pauses, his eyes quickly glancing over his brother and grimaces, “eugh.”
Yuuji’s jaw drops. “What do you mean eugh? We look the same! We have the same face!”
Sukuna slowly turns his attention back to his phone, turning his body so that Yuuji can’t peek at his screen. “Whatever helps you sleep at night, buddy.”
With a shake of his head, Yuuji kicks his brother in the leg and goes back to playing his game, grumbling under his breath.
Focusing back to his phone, the older boy goes back to replying to Megumi. He types out a message only to backspace and try again. This happens 3 or 4 times which seems to be enough to concern Megumi because another message pops up.
Raisin boy: I'm just pulling your leg 😂 I agree that Loki is far better than Joker
Sukuna’s jaw drops as he stares at the message. Another one pops in.
Raisin boy: As your brother likes to say… Got em
Unable to keep himself from chuckling, Sukuna shakes his head and his mouth cracks a smile. “Oh my God.”
Yuuji glances over, his attention caught by the sound of his brother laughing. “Okay, seriously, who are you messaging?”
“Shut up,” is Sukuna’s reply.
Raisin boy: And you say that you’re not a movie buff
Biting his lip, Sukuna mulls over what he wants to say next. Since they’re on the topic of movies, he wants to ask Megumi to come over when his family isn’t home so they can actually watch The Exorcist and The Conjuring together as they’ve had planned.
He kicks Yuuji in the leg. “Do you still have plans with your friend Johnny or whatever on Thursday?”
Yuuji makes a face. “... you mean Junpei?”
“Yeah, sure.”
The younger boy slowly nods his head. “Uh yeah, why—”
“'K, thanks.”
Sukuna begins typing out his message, asking Megumi if he’s busy on Thursday afternoon. He hopes whatever higher being is out there watching that the other boy isn’t busy. It’s almost disgusting to Sukuna how much he wants to spend time with Megumi. Sukuna doesn’t even want to spend this much time with his own friends. Or friend, in this case. Maki doesn’t mind, of course. She has her own life and isn’t reliant on Sukuna for socialization.
“Who are you bringing over?!” Yuuji exclaims, dropping the controller to turn his full body in Sukuna’s direction. “That’s the only explanation!”
Sukuna scoffs. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”
“I would!”
The next thing Sukuna knows, Yuuji lunges at him. He tries to grab the phone out of Sukuna’s hands but his grip is strong, the two of them playing tug-of-war with it. Yuuji tries twisting his body so that his back is facing Sukuna, pinning the older boy’s arms under his armpit to give him better leverage when attempting to pry the device out of Sukuna’s fingers.
“Yuuji, you brat! Let go!” Sukuna grunts.
“You first!”
Sukuna makes the decision to let go with one hand so that he can tickle Yuuji’s side, in hopes of making his brother lose his grip. It works, but not in the way that he had hoped. The phone slips free of Sukuna’s fingers and Yuuji’s jerky movements are enough to send it falling and sliding acros the hardwood floor.
Naturally, Yuuji dives for it first, scrambling along the ground to grab it. He cheers in victory and flops down on his back, holding the phone above his face as he reads the name on the screen. Sukuna is quick to jump to his feet as he snatches the phone out of his brother’s hands. However, the damage is already done, judging by the confused look on his face.
Yuuji sits up, yelling after his brother's retreating figure. “Who the hell is Raisin boy?!"
#jjk#sukuna#sukufushi#yuji#rizzless sukuna#credit to nessieartss for yujis line at the end because we had a great conversation with that#echo writes#im realizing that megumi is a little like ooc in this with how invested he is with sukuna#but let me have this one dorky series alright#also sukuna is kinda ooc but im working on it
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Apothecary - chapter three
joel miller x witchy!reader
series masterlist
someone comes looking for her help that she hadn't been expecting. joel continues to grapple with what's true and what isn't. lines are crossed that they won't be able to come back from.
warnings | 18+ canon-typical violence, angst, spooky vibes as always
................................
She knew it was too good to be true. It always is. They always are. She shouldn’t have let herself believe him, that he wouldn’t let the people in town sway his mind. She had wanted, more than anything, for it to be true. She had wanted him. But it’s been two weeks since she’s heard from Joel Miller, and she’s finding herself having to quietly accept that he’s just like the rest of them.
The first few days after they went up into the mountains together, she managed to reason to herself that he was just busy with patrol shifts. But a few days turned into a week, and then something happened that made it clear to her that he wasn’t just busy. She had been wandering along the tables of the weekly town market, Stevie close on her heels, when she saw him a little further down the way, arms crossed over his chest and talking with Tommy. She smiled when his eyes met hers, only feeling a little dorky for the small wave she offered him, but his face had been unreadable, flat, expressionless. He didn’t so much as acknowledge her, muttering something to his brother before turning heel and walking away. Away from her. When she got back to her shop afterward, the sweet bunch of sunflowers she had traded for had all wilted and browned, crisped petals falling off the shriveled stalks.
She hadn’t felt embarrassed like that in a long time, the thick skin she had developed living in Jackson usually protecting her from it. But the way that he had ignored her, practically shunned her, had a slippery heat creeping up her throat that she never wanted to feel again. She hung a wreath of rosemary and lavender on her front door and the door to her shop that night, a protection she learned from her mother. And the next day, she took to the task of forgetting all about Joel Miller, and the man she thought he was.
It hasn’t exactly been difficult to distract herself. Afterall, it seems like there’s always someone else with some sort of affliction, needing her help. But things become complicated when, one night, someone comes knocking on the backdoor to her shop that she hadn’t been expecting.
“Um, hi– hello. My friends sent me, they told me you could help?” She squints at the girl in the dim shadows, the only light coming from inside her shop.
“You’re Ellie, right?” The girl’s face brightens at that, worry smoothing out as she nods.
“Mmhmm, yep. That’s me.” Joel’s kid. She has only seen her in passing around town, but she recognizes her right away.
“What do you need help with?” Ellie bites her lip, eyes darting around a bit before settling back on her.
“Could I– can I come in?” She hesitates, but nods, stepping aside to let the girl into the back of the shop.
“Woah, this place is so fucking cool.” She has to laugh, watching Ellie’s wide eyes roam around the back room as she shuffles inside, her head whipping around to the sound of the back door shutting.
“You said you needed some help? What’s going on?” Ellie lets out a nervous laugh, her brows scrunching up as she smiles at her.
“So, just for the record, I don’t believe what everyone says about you.” Her brows raise at that, stepping around Ellie to tend to the pot she has going on the stove.
“You don’t?”
“Nope– I mean, I know you help people. But I think it’s a little ridiculous to be calling someone a wi– I mean, unless you like being called a witch, then I think that’s cool too–” She laughs lightly at Ellie’s nervous ramble, turning away from the stove to offer her a reassuring smile.
“It’s alright, Ellie. You can call me whatever you want to, really, I don’t mind. But what I would like to hear is what you need my help with.” Ellie nods jerkily, taking a sharp inhale before responding.
“Well, um, some of my friends told me that you’ll help people with, like– relationship stuff?” She thinks she knows what the kid is referring to, but needs her to explain it herself.
“Relationship stuff?” Ellie nods.
“Yeah, like– one of my friends– he said his mom came to you for help with his dad, her husband, I guess. He said you made him love her again.” She crosses her arms over her chest, sighing deeply at Ellie’s words.
“I didn’t make anyone do anything, kid. I provide– nudges. What people make of those is up to them, though.”
“Ok! So, could you help me with a– a nudge, then?” Ellie’s eyes are wide, rimmed with hope as she worries her bottom lip between her teeth.
“How old are you, kid?” Ellie squares up her shoulders at that.
“Eighteen.” She quirks her brow, and Ellie sighs.
“Fine, I’m seventeen.” Still not buying it, she tilts her chin at the girl, whose shoulders finally slump.
“I’m fifteen, alright? But I really, really like this girl– and all I’m asking for is some help getting her to notice me, that’s all!” She sighs.
“Kid–”
“Please– I’ll do just about anything for your help– I-I can trade you for it! I could, like, help out around the shop for you, run errands for you. Just– please, will you help me?” She can already feel herself caving in to the girl’s pleas. When Stevie jumps up onto the butcher’s block and starts nuzzling at Ellie’s arm, her resolve disappears completely.
“Alright, alright, I’ll help you–” Ellie’s face splits out into a grin, clearly getting ready to let out an exclamation, but she isn’t done talking.
“But, this isn’t gonna be the strong stuff, ok? You’re way too young to be messing with that. And I’m gonna take you up on that offer– you can come and work for me after your classes in trade for it. That sound like a deal?” Ellie laughs, nodding.
“Yep, yeah, yes ma’am. You have a deal.”
…
“Wait, that’s it?” Ellie holds up the small jar, watching the honey drip slowly from one side to the other. Stevie lets out a little mrrp from where she’s sitting in Ellie’s lap, yellow eyes looking up at her.
“Not quite, here–” She gets up from her seat at the butcher’s block, quickly grabbing a scrap of paper and pencil before setting them down in front of Ellie.
“I want you to write down what– or who– it is you want to attract on that piece of paper. Keep it in your mind as you fold it up and tuck it into the jar, ok?” Ellie nods, quickly scribbling out what she thinks is a name, though she tries to keep herself from peering over the girl’s quickly moving hands. Honey jar spells remind her of her mother. One of the first times she got to see her working was on such a spell, and it had been a real lesson in the work they do.
“People believe what they want to believe, my dear. We just help them guide that belief into reality. That’s what this power really is, an ability to see what others can’t. Our eyes are just a bit more open than everyone else’s. It’s not the spells that matter, it’s the minds that believe they matter that make all the difference.”
Ellie scrunches her eyes shut as she folds up the paper, and she can’t help but smile at the girl as she tucks the scrap into the jar. Her eyes blink open, shoulders slumping a bit.
“Is that it?” She snorts at the girl’s clearly unimpressed expression.
“Well, what did you expect? That she’d be knocking down the door right away?” Ellie shrugs, huffing a little as she scratches under Stevie’s chin.
“No– I mean, maybe?”
“Kid, I told you. I deal in nudges. Not full-throttle shoves.” She screws the lid onto the jar, tilting it side to side before handing it to Ellie.
“Put that somewhere that you can look at it every day. On a nightstand works best– and when you find a moment, like when you’re going to sleep, just think on it again with that same intention in mind, alright? We have a way of attracting what we focus on, if we actually focus.” Ellie nods, tilting the jar this way and that, the honey glinting in the dim light of the shop
“Alright– thank you. Um, when do you want me to start working?” Stevie leaps out of Ellie’s lap and onto the table, sniffing at the jar in the girl’s hand.
“Why don’t you come around tomorrow after school? I’ll show you how to take care of the plants– could use an extra set of hands for that chore.”
…
Ellie’s been coming in most afternoons for a little over a week now, and she has to admit, the girl’s help has been more than welcomed. She’s good with the plants, eagerly learning about what needs watered when, and what needs moved into and out of the afternoon sun streaming in through the shop windows. And Stevie certainly likes her too. She knows that Ellie is about to come into the shop when the cat jumps down from wherever she’s been perched for most of the day and pads out to the front of the shop before the door even opens.
But one thing that she has been wondering about is what Joel thinks about this set-up. Clearly, he wants nothing to do with her, not anymore. So she reckons he must not be too happy with his kid spending every afternoon in her shop.
“Hey, Ellie?” The girl turns from where she had been trimming away dead leaves from a potted mint plant, tilting her head in response.
“Does your dad mind that you’re working here?” Ellie seems taken aback by the question, eventually letting out a snort of laughter.
“Who, Joel? He’s not my dad. He’s my– well, he’s my– Joel. But, he doesn’t tell me what to do, y’know? I’m my own person and shit.” She nods with a smile, trying not to laugh at Ellie’s crass explanation while also fitting another puzzle piece together in her mind. It makes sense now, why she had picked up on Sarah’s name and not Ellie’s. But it’s also clear to her that whatever they are to each other, they’re close.
She turns to get back to work propagating some verbena, but stops when Ellie clears her throat.
“Um, I feel like maybe I should apologize for him. I don’t know what happened between you guys, but he likes you, I swear. He’s just– he can be a little–”
“All or nothing?” Ellie sighs.
“I was gonna say asshole-y– but yeah, that too. He tends to shut down when he’s figuring something out. But he does like you! He’d probably kill me for telling you this– but he always asks about you when I get home.” That surprises her, brows raising at Ellie’s admission.
“Now who’s nudging who, huh?” That gets a light laugh out of Ellie, shaking her head as they both settle back into quietly working across the shop from one another. Her mind, however, is anything but silent, rolling over the fact that Joel has been asking about her like a sour candy that burns extra sweet.
…
With the town’s summer dance happening that night, she sends Ellie home early, guessing that the girl will be eager to see her crush at the festivities. Normally she wouldn’t go to something like this, not wanting all the eyes and whispers on her. But she’s just a little too curious to see who has won over Ellie’s affections, and begrudgingly decides to head down to see what all the fuss is about.
It seems like just about everyone in town has converged on what’s normally the mess hall, tables and chairs pushed out of the way to form a makeshift dance floor. There’s even live music, someone at an old piano and a few men with guitars making due with what they have. Even though she slips to the back of the room, leaning up against the wall, trying to blend in to the background, her ears still prick to the whispers starting to pass around the room about her. But she doesn’t care about that, not when she sees Ellie, dancing and laughing with another girl whom she’s pretty sure is named Dina. Her heart flips at the sight, and she can’t help but smile watching the pair transition into a very awkward slow dance. She doesn’t have much time to enjoy the scene, however, when a rough hand comes to her shoulder.
“Well, look who decided to grace us with her presence.”
…
Under any other circumstances, Joel wouldn’t be caught dead at something like this dance. But, with only a little grumbling, he decided to go along with Ellie after she mentioned that she had a date for it. There won’t be any funny business going on, not on his watch, though he has to admit that it’s nice to see her having a good time with Dina, the girl that has been making much more frequent appearances at their house lately.
Leaning back against one of the walls of the mess hall, his eyes wander around the crowd, stuttering stopped when he sees her across the room. There’s no two ways about it, he’s been avoiding her, trying to get his mind right before he jumped any further into something he couldn’t see the bottom of.
It felt like something clicked when Mason talked to him that night at the bar. About her meddling. Suddenly, he had to ask himself why he had fallen so quickly for her when he hadn’t been able to feel anything like that in decades. It was too good to be true. As if by– well, as if by magic. So, he’s been keeping his distance, though it’s not like that’s actually helped him resolve his feelings for her, and now, he can’t help but stare at her like a total fool, frowning when he notices the scrunch of discomfort clear on her face. That’s when he notices the man leaning next to her, his face turned down to speak directly into her ear, a hand gripping her shoulder to keep her where she is.
Joel is moving through the crowd toward them before his brain can even catch up.
…
“Can I help you, Mason?” She keeps her eyes trained forward, only catching the sneer of his smile from the corner of her vision as he crowds up next to her.
“Down, girl. Can’t a guy be nice? Just wanted to come by and say hello.” She huffs, crossing her arms over her chest and jerking her chin toward him just slightly.
“Well, you’ve said hello. Now why don’t you go find some other lucky lady to bother?” He barks out a laugh, letting it fizzle into a sigh. She can’t quite twist her face away quick enough as he brings his hand - the one that isn’t gripping her shoulder - up to graze his fingers along her cheek.
“Don’t be like that, miss witch. I’m sorry for giving you and Miller a hard time. Though it seems like he couldn’t handle the heat.” She’s heard enough, shrugging out of his grip and shuffling through the crowd to get out of the mess hall and as far away from him as she can. But Mason is nothing if not persistent.
“Now, now, can’t say I mind a little chase, sweetheart. But let’s cut the bullshit, huh?” She chokes on a gasp when he grabs her from behind, a solid forearm barred across her chest as he pulls her into the shadows behind the mess hall, shoving her hard up against the exterior wall.
“Since Miller got a taste and is still standing, I figure I oughta find out what all the fuss is about myself.” His hands pin her against the wall by her shoulders, one heavy boot pressed over the top of her sneaker to keep her still. She can smell the liquor on his breath his face is so close to hers. It’s a reflex borne out of pure disgust when she rears her head back as best she can and spits in his face. Mason just laughs.
“Oh, little witch, you’re going to regret that.” With that, his grip on her shoulders tightens, slamming her hard against the wall, once, twice, three times, her ears ringing and her skull ricocheting from the impact. Everything goes a bit tilted in the aftermath, her brain fuzzy and spinning as she slumps back against the wall, barely registering Mason getting wrenched away from her. She steadies herself with a hand pressed to her forehead, finally realizing that someone has laid Mason out on the ground before her, fist rearing up again and again to rain down on the man’s face.
“J-Joel?”
…
He’d like to keep punching until he feels bone shatter beneath his knuckles, his mind alight with a pure, clear rage as he batters Mason’s face. Joel hadn’t been quick enough following them out of the mess hall, and by the time he was rounding the side of the building, he only just caught the way Mason had slammed her against the wall, her head jerking like a rag doll’s. If left to his own devices, Joel reckons that he’d just keep throwing his fist down until the bastard was no longer breathing. But her voice is enough to cut through the haze, stopping him where he’s kneeling over Mason’s limp body as he whips his head around to look at her.
Her eyes are wide, tears glinting in the fading summer light, her arms outstretched in front of her, palms open as if to reach for him. Joel’s shoulders slacken under her gaze, but before he gets up, he leans back over Mason, dragging his face up by a harsh grip on the collar of his shirt.
“If you so much as look at her again, I will know, and I won’t be feeling so generous the next time. Do you understand?” Mason’s head is crooked back on his neck, eyes drooping closed and mouth agape, blood smeared across his face. But Joel doesn’t give a shit, he just needs to hear him say it.
“Do you understand?” He punctuates his words with a harsh jerk of his hands in the man’s shirt collar, making his head jerk and loll.
“I-I understand! I understand– please– please don’t– I won’t f-f-fucking touch her, I swear!” Mason’s words come out garbled by the thick blood pooling in his mouth, but Joel has heard enough, letting go of the man’s collar and letting him slump back down onto the ground. Joel’s mind is still swimming in a hot tide of anger when he stands up, the only feeling he can really register is the smarting sting of his split knuckles. And then, a firm palm on his shoulder finally gets him to turn away from Mason’s curled-up figure.
“We should go. I can take care of that hand for you.”
…
“A lot of plants in here.”
“Mmhmm.” She absentmindedly responds to Joel’s mumbled observation, jerkily moving around her kitchen to gather what she needs to fix up his knuckles. She doesn’t let her mind linger on the fact that he’s the first other person who has been inside her house in years, instead focusing her thoughts on the clean, damp rag in her hand as she sits down across from him at her kitchen table. She hesitates to reach for him, but he willingly offers his hand to her, his eyes a weighty heat as she starts to daub away the smeared blood on his knuckles. She works quietly, keeping her head tilted down toward the task, not daring to meet his gaze, though she feels it like a force of nature sweeping over her.
“Are you– are you alright?” Her hands still where she had been working away at his injury, and she has to take a deep breath to smooth the warble in her throat before she answers him.
“I-I’m fine– just a little shaken up– um, literally.” It’s a horrible attempt at a joke to lighten the mood, she knows it the second the words leave her mouth, his hand curling into a fist on the table.
“I am fine, really. Thank you– for stopping him. I wouldn’t have been able– I couldn’t–” He stops her stuttered words, resting his palm over both of her shaking hands on the table. Her eyes finally meet his, and for a moment, there’s just sweetness. But then she remembers the reality that it took her nearly getting assaulted for Joel to stop avoiding her, and she quickly jerks her hands away from his, scrubbing harshly at her eyes with the heels of her palms.
“Why did you– how– why were you out there?” He sighs, long and low, sitting back in his chair.
“I saw him bothering you in the mess hall. Guess I followed you out.”
“Why?” She can’t look at him, not right now, or she’ll get tangled up all over again. So instead, she keeps her eyes on her hands clasped in front of her on the table, listening to the huff he lets out at her question.
“Just wanted to make sure you were alright.” She can’t help the bitter laugh that spills out at that, looking up at him, his brow furrowed at her reaction.
“I’m sorry, I guess I have a hard time believing that when you haven’t so much as looked at me in nearly a month.” Joel presses his lips in a thin line, his jaw ticking slightly as he looks at her.
“I’ll admit that I’ve been– keeping my distance–” She scoffs at his choice of words, but he continues speaking.
“But you didn’t tell me the whole truth.” That gives her pause, her fidgeting fingers going still at the stern tinge to his voice. Before she answers, she takes his hand back in hers, getting back to work on wrapping his already swelling knuckles.
“What do you mean?”
“Heard a little more about you. How you like getting involved in other people’s business.”
“I thought you didn’t care what other people said about me.” He lets out a harsh sigh, pulling his now bandaged hand away and raking his fingers through his hair, tugging lightly in clear frustration.
“It’s a little hard not to when it seems like you’re not being straight with me, darlin.” She tries to tamp it down, but her chest still squeezes at the term of endearment, though she’s quick to clear her throat of the rising feeling.
“Ellie told me about your– nudges? S’what she called them, I think.” Her stomach twists at that. Though it’s not exactly a secret that she has a proclivity for helping folks, mostly women, with their troubled love lives, she had been trying to keep that away from him. She hadn’t even considered that Ellie would tell him about it, a stupid mistake, she realizes. Anyways, it’s become a lot rarer for someone to come to her for that, Ellie the first in many months, though she can admit that she used to be a lot more involved, and a lot less subtle with it.
“I just– I need you to be real honest with me right now. Did you– do something to me?” That makes her laugh, any anxiety quickly getting displaced by anger. Yep, just like the rest of them.
“Is it so hard to believe you liked me that you need to explain it away with fucking magic?” She spits out the word as if it sits sour on her tongue, her eyes narrowing at him. When he doesn’t answer, lips parted and wide eyes just staring at her, she lets out another laugh.
“Believe this, Joel. I didn’t do anything to you. I don’t do things to people, that’s not how I work, no matter what anyone tells you.” Finished talking, she slumps back in her chair, pinching the bridge of her nose as a throbbing headache settles in.
“You said liked?” She cracks one eye open, seeing him now leaning forward, his hands clasped on the table as he looks at her.
“What– what’re you talking about?”
“You said I liked you– like I don’t anymore.”
“Don’t you?” He shakes his head, eyes shimmering in the dim light of her kitchen.
“No– I mean, I never stopped– liking you, that is. Fuck– I feel so lost, darlin. You gotta understand that I haven’t felt like this in a long time. Didn’t think I ever would again. And then– then you show up and I-I feel like I’m back in highschool or some shit. You’ve got me smitten like a fucking fool and I barely know you– and it feels impossible.” She’s a bit shocked by his words, musing to herself that this might be the most she’s heard Joel say at once. And apparently he isn’t done either.
“I want this, want you, probably more than I should. But Christ, I don’t think I can do this unless you tell me the whole story, your whole story.” She sees her path forked so clearly in that moment. She could shut down and throw him out, tell Ellie that she won’t be needing her help anymore, sever these threads just as she’s gotten so good at doing. But the truth is, she feels much the way Joel does. This is uncharted territory for her, these threads that she doesn’t want to cut, but instead tug closer and closer. And so, she makes the choice to walk a path that she hasn’t ever before.
When she finally speaks, she starts at the beginning.
#joel miller angst#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller#joel miller x you#joel miller x reader#joel miller fluff#joel miller series#joel miller imagine#tlou fanfiction#the last of us#tlou
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Me and My Husband-Chapter 1
Summary + series masterlist
Main masterlist
Chapter 2 / chapter 3
This is a slow burn wolfstar x reader/arranged marriage au
Word count : 2,724
The Marauders had all piled up into a carriage of the Hogwarts Express, sweets and lollies littering the seats and floor as they talked all about their break from school. Sirius had of course spent most of his break with the Potters once again before having to go back home before the start of their new school year. "We went to this muggle movie theatre and it was amazing, I've never been to one before" Sirius was currently spouting out about all the things he had done with James, not having a chance to do those kinds of things in his own home. "It was quite fun until we almost got kicked out because Padfoot here wouldn't shut up!" James spoke up with a humorous tone. "Well enough about that, how did your guys break go?" Sirius asked the other two boys after giving James a slight shove. Remus spoke up first "I went to visit my grandparents, they live out in the countryside, so it was nice to have some peace and quiet finally" Peter timidly spoke, a hint of concern in his voice. "Did you handle the full moons alright?" Remus gave a slight nod "it's a pretty secluded area, plus lots of room to run around" He gave Peter a smile to ease up any concern he had for the young Werewolf.
The rest of the trip was filled with mindless talk about more stuff that happened during their break, what kind of pranks they were planning this year and of course relationships. Sirius seemed to stiffen as soon as the topic had been brought up. Peter droned on about his new hufflepuff girlfriend he had gotten at the end of last year before asking the others if they had any crushes or anything. "Well I can't say I have one yet, but who knows this year I might get lucky" James said with a huge dorky grin on his face. After being rejected by Lily Evans far too many times the boy had decided it was best to move on, and now without the constant attempts to gain her affection they had become close friends. Sirius hadn't contributed much to the conversation though, in fact he hadn't spoken a word since Peter had brought the topic up. Although James and Peter didn't notice, the two boys continued with meaningless conversation. Remus on the other hand had noticed how Sirius was unusually quiet, his stormy eyes didn't look away from the window he was leaning against until the scarred hand of the tall boy touched his knee gently "you alright padfoot?" Remus's soft voice had always been pleasant to his ears. Sirius gave a small nod and faked a smile, though Remus could always tell when someone was faking a smile he just always knew, tilting his head as his eyebrows furrowed, clearly not believing what he had said. It scared Sirius just how much of an open book he seemed to Remus, though he guessed everyone felt that way about the tall boy. He knew Remus knew he was lying, he leant down towards him "I'm here if you need anything Sirius" giving him a soft smile, everything about Remus Lupin was soft, his hair, his voice, his warm skin and even the sweaters he always wore. Thankfully though he didn't press on, just leaving his large warm hand on Sirius's knee.
The train ride had come to an end soon after that, the four rowdy boys rushing off the train. All laughing like madmen at some stupid joke James had said. "Let's get to hogwarts quickly I'm starved" Sirius said with an over dramatic and drawn out sigh, James slung his arm around him as a laugh was drawn out from him "yeah because you totally didn't have enough from the trolley" Sirius elbowed him in the side, although that did nothing to discourage James. "Yeah padfoot you would've brought her whole stock if Moony hadn't stopped you" Peters jab had James cracking up all over again. Even Remus let out a small laugh, though Sirius just huffed "you're all the worst" shaking his head at his three friends. "Yeah but you'd be lost without us" James stated, ruffling up the hair of his best friend. As they continued walking Sirius caught sight of the one person he dreaded seeing around the school other than his younger brother, Y/n l/n, or as he referred to her since their last meeting during their break, the absolute bane of his existence. The sight of the expensive jewellery she wore on her hand made his thoughts bubble with anger, she was just as pompous and up herself as ever. He quickly dismissed the thoughts of her, not wanting to think more of it.
The four friends eventually found their way to the great hall, watching on as new 1st years were getting sorted. The boys were certainly the loudest when new students were sorted into Gryffindor. After the sorting and the same speech Dumbledore gave every year the feast had begun, everyone digging in and talking loudly with the people around them. Once the boys had finished eating they rushed to their dorm room, already excited to start planning out pranks for their last year. They all fell asleep quicker then they had initially planned on, the adrenalin wearing off as they started to crash out, barely out of their clothes or under their covers. Remus fell asleep sitting at his desk, his head leaning against his sweater he was using as a makeshift pillow. James was sitting upright, leant against the headboard of his bed, Sirius had crashed out at the end of James bed, his legs dangling off the edge of the bed. And Peter had fallen asleep on his own bed, though lying on top of the covers in nothing but sweat pants he had changed into.
They woke up later than usual, all stiff and sore from the uncomfortable positions they slept in, except for Peter, he was just cold. They all got dressed and decided to go down to the courtyard, they had the entire weekend to settle back in before 7th year classes started. Which they were all eternally grateful for. The Marauders made their way outside, laughing and joking around as usual. Finding somewhere nice to sit they picked back up their conversation from last night. "So this year everything needs to be bigger and better boys" James announced, clapping his hands together "I was thinking that prank we did last year on Snivellus, when we turned his uniform bright pink for the whole day, was pretty good but we could definitely top that". As soon as he finished the four boys all had that same classic Marauders look on their faces that screamed they were up to no good and to steer clear. Sirius shot up "how about we make it rainbow and glitter" Peter laughed and added on "yeah we could even add frills this time" that sent the boys into a crazed fit of laughter all except Remus. It wasn't that he was against the idea, it was more that he had something else in mind "or we could turn his uniform into the girl's one" despite his voice not being as loud as the others, their laughter had completely stopped. Wide devious smiles quickly covered the shocked looks they gave him "Merlin Remus you're a bloody genius!" James shouted, as he ruffled his hair up in approval.
They continued talking about how they'd pull it off when James noticed none other than Lily Evans walking through the courtyard "hey Lily!" James shouted out without a second thought. Lily's head shot up and she smiled at the boys walking over with one of her friends she had been talking to. "Hello boys, I hope the break treated you all well" the boys responded with simple answers of head nods and even a thumbs up from Remus. Sirius had finally noticed who Lily just so happened to drag along with her, of course it just had to be her, Y/n. "Mind if we sit with you guys?" Lily asked, her tone as sweet as always. Sirius would have denied her, almost saying how they were planning some 'Marauders' stuff. But of course James beat him to it "of course not, go for it ladies" he smiled at the two girls as they sat down. Sirius was angry at this, not at James for letting her sit with them, but at Y/n for thinking she could just sit near him so casually.
Sirius couldn't help the hateful glare as he watched the girl in front of him, seemingly avoiding conversation with the rest of the Marauders. All he could focus on was the girl he deemed to be the bane of his existence talking away with Lily, the two only met because of Lily's best friend Severus due to the two being in Slytherin. His stormy eyes held a gaze with the glittering gem on her left ring finger, acting as a constant and cruel reminder of his unwanted fate. Remus of course had noticed, he always did when Sirius's mood suddenly changed. The Werewolf leant down to whisper into said boys ear "You know if you keep brooding at her you're going to burn holes into the back of her head" he let out a soft huff of amusement as the boy looked back over at him, an incredulous look on his face "I'm not brooding, I just don't like her" Remus had that look on his face, the kind of look that said yeah that's totally it. The boy shook his head leaving the over dramatic boy to continue his not brooding session.
Y/n knew Sirius was glaring, she could feel his eyes on her as soon as she sat down with Lily. She tried to ignore it, instead choosing to focus on her conversation with said girl about their breaks, the muggle born witch always asked about the balls and events Y/n went to. Neither minded talking about it, Lily got an inside view of what rich and exclusive Pure Blood gatherings were like and Y/n was able to boast about the overly expensive dresses and jewellery she wore to each event and how pretty she felt in them. She was able to ignore the glaring eyes that seemed almost harsh enough to feel in her skull, until Lily had pointed it out "you know Sirius has been staring at you this entire time" the Slytherin didn't spare a glance at the mentioned boy "I'm well aware, he's been doing that a lot lately, I have no idea why" she let out a scoff at the end of her sentence. As much as she liked to talk about every little detail that happened during her break to Lily. The one thing she just so happened to leave out was the meeting between both her family and the Blacks. When Y/n's left hand combed through her hair brushing it back giving Sirius a perfect view of the beautiful ring he had come to hate, and of course he had taken it as a personal insult, as if she was flaunting the expensive jewel on her finger to dig the knife deeper into him. And that kind of insult wasn't something he had taken very lightly as something seemed to snap inside him, the black haired boy stood up abruptly walking over to the two girls "may I have a word with you l/n" his stormy grey eyes filled with hatred and disgust met the dull and harsh eyes of the girl he stared down, awaiting an answer from her. "With all due respect Black I'm currently busy" despite the two seeming to hate each other's guts, they always still acted formal with each other, years of being raised by pure blood families leaving its mark on the two teens."Yes well it's a very urgent matter Y/n" at the use of her first name she sighed and stood from her seat next to Lily, Sirius had only ever seemed to use her first name when he was beyond angry at her "i'll be back soon Lily" the girl just smiled and nodded joining the conversation with the rest of the marauders as Sirius dragged her away. Remus noticed the tight grip his friend had on the girl's wrist, he felt a tinge of worry creeping up on him, though he seemed to be the only one who noticed, not even Lily had noticed how Sirius pulled away the girl she was just talking to a second ago. Remus knew he was overly perceptive sometimes to his own detriment, so he softly interrupted the group's chatter with the excuse of going to the bathroom. Only to follow the two teens who had just left, stopping just before turning the corner peeking over slightly to see the people he was looking for.
Sirius had cornered Y/n against the wall, not wanting to let her leave until he spoke to her "do you seriously have to wear that stupid ring everywhere" he scoffed down at her, disgust clear in his voice. The Slytherin rolled her eyes at the boy "my parents wanted me to, it's not like I could say no to them, you know what will happen if Regulus finds out you're not wearing yours, do you really want your parents to find out" it was now Sirius's turn to roll his eyes "that doesn't mean you have to flaunt it around and keep reminding me of it" the girls face morphed from slightly irritated to furious "Excuse me! You think I'm flaunting it, as if I ever wanted this, as if I like this any more than you do!" Her voice kept rising in octaves as she yelled at the boy in front of her. "All I'm saying is you seem far too comfortable wearing that to be too upset about it" he leaned down into her face, it was clear to Y/n he was trying to intimidate her, there was a pause of silence before a loud slap rang out in the empty corridor they had found themselves in. Sirius's hand shooting up to hold his now reddening and sore face "you prick! Stop speaking to me like that, as if you know anything about me, it's like you think it's my life's dream to be betrothed and bear children to some moronic teenage boy I hate, simply to uphold our stupid pure-blood lineage!" Sirius was too stunned to speak, he didn't know if it was because of the slap, the angry words the usually quiet girl had yelled at him, or the tears that were now violently streaming down her face. Y/n turned away from him, face red and hot from her anger and tears, in doing so she had locked eyes with none other than Remus Lupin who was standing at the end of the corridor in shock only slightly out of view, both their eyes widening as their eyes locked. Y/n letting out a shocked gasp had alerted Sirius, whose head shot over to look at Remus, the tall Werewolf looking between the two, a slight bit of fear etched on his face at being caught. He looked down "sorry, I didn't mean to overhear anything, I was just worried about you" he didn't say who exactly he was talking about, eyes locking onto the floor. Though Remus himself didn't know who he was talking about either, only looking up when he heard the sudden movement of feet, watching as Y/n shoved Sirius away from her. Finally being freed from against the wall, she took off in the other direction, unable to contain her violent sobbing. Remus looked awkwardly at Sirius as he slowly made his way over, the taller boy staying still in his spot "you can't tell the others about this, can you promise me that Moony?" Remus seemed shocked, while he looked at Sirius. He seemed so vulnerable and scared, almost weak even as a few tears leaked down his face "I- I promise… I won't tell anyone anything" he gently put his hand on Sirius's shoulder. Said boy leaned into the touch of his friend, he sniffled slight before speaking "thank you Remus"
#harry potter#james potter#remus lupin#sirius black#the marauders#the marauders era#peter pettigrew#remus x sirius#remus lupin x sirius black#Wolfstar#arranged marriage#slow burn#lots of angst#eventual smut#eventual romance#poly!wolfstar#regulus black x james potter#jegulus#james potter x regulus black#Wolfstar x reader#sirius black x reader#remus lupin x reader#Sirius Black x reader x remus lupin
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Time wasn't in our favor - Part 1
Pairing: TASM Peter Parker (Andrew Garfield) x Female!Reader
Summary: "Ooh, I can give you a mini tour of my New York city!" - What if...your soulmate is from another universe but you didn't know? Soulmate AU. Set during NWH, fluff.
Note: This will stray from NWH's main events since I needed to make it longer cause in the movie, they were only there for probably a few hours. Also, I just took 2 random elements as part of the cure, don't hold me responsible for that. Based on 'See you later' (ten years) by Jenna Raine.
Word count: 5k
Series Masterlist: Prologue, Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Happy Ending, Sad Ending.
"Damn, was I gone for years? Since when could you do magic?" Y/N jested as she walked through the portal that apparently Ned had conjured up. Her two friends smiled as they spotted the familiar glimmer in her eyes.
"Oh, you missed a lot," MJ commented, smiling sweetly at Y/N. "We all miss you a lot," she admitted. Ned nodded eagerly at this.
"Awe, MJ, I miss you guys too. It's boring not getting into trouble," Y/N half-hearted joke.
"Anyways, where am I? and where's Peter?" Y/N asked, observing the cozy living room she was in.
"You're at my grandma's house, and see...we don't know where he is, but since we managed to portal you here, we figure let's try to portal Peter here too,"
"I am so not used to this magic and portal talk," Y/N sighed. "But alright, let's do this."
Circling his fingers again, Ned muttered, "Find Peter Parker." The portal flickered but didn't open. With more determination, the boy repeated, "Find Peter Parker!"
This time, he successfully opened the portal. The three teens looked at the alley way presented in front of them. Stood afar was Peter Parker in his Spiderman suit.
"Peter! It's us! Come!" MJ yelled, watching as the boy confusingly turned around and looked at the portal. Y/N, however, wasn't convinced about the person despite her vast distance from the boy in spandex.
Even from afar, she could tell he was too tall.
"Strange question. Are you sure that's Peter and not someone clowning us?" Y/N muttered.
"Of course that's Peter, I doubt that there is another Peter Parker who is Spiderman," MJ responded before gesturing for Peter to come into the living room. The boy did as told, jogging towards the portal. Y/N watched as he grew taller and taller until MJ and Ned both scrunched their face in the same confused state Y/N was in.
That was the moment he took his mask off.
"Who the hell are you?" MJ accusingly pointed out, crossing her arms.
"I'm Peter Parker," the unbelievably attractive stranger repli-
wait, what - unbelievably attractive? Y/N snap out of it.
"That's not possible," MJ left no room for discussions.
"I'm Spiderman - in my world, but then yesterday I was...I-I was just here...String theory, multi-dimensional reality, and matter of displacement - all real?" Peter asked, looking at the portal with dorky amazement. The sight somehow made Y/N feel giggly.
And so she did - a chuckle left her mouth, drawing the stranger’s attention. As his gaze landed on her, Peter's lips parted a bit. Their eyes locked and something about this first moment seemed like it won't be the last. Those chocolate brown eyes, how could something hold such softness yet the same amount of pain? An overbearing feeling tingled every inch of Y/N's body as she froze in her spot.
His eyes were seemingly whispering to her, “have we met?” Something about him just pulled Y/N in.
"Yeah," MJ grunted skeptically.
"I knew it," he broke the eye contact, looking at MJ, while Y/N averted her gaze to her foot.
"Prove it," MJ quickly filled the silence.
"Prove what?"
"That you're Peter Parker."
"I don't carry an ID with me. It kinda defeats the whole anonymous superhero thing," Peter spoke up. What surprised him, though, was how his eyes automatically trailed to the quiet one of the three teens. It was as if his body begged for a response from her. If he didn't know any better, he would say his mind was trying to impress her.
Just as a piece of Peter started reminding him of Gwen, it evaporated as he watched Y/N’s lips twitch into an amused smirk.
Taking advantage of his distracted state, MJ threw bread at him.
"Why did you do that?" Peter asked.
"I was trying to see if you have the tingle thing."
"I have the tingle thing, just not for bread- can you not throw the bread again? You're a deeply distrusting person and I respect it." he launched to the ceiling, hoping the girl would believe him. His eyes once again crawled back to Y/N. Peter grinned internally when he saw her eyebrows lift in silent approval.
"Crawl around," Peter looked back at MJ again upon hearing her demand.
"Crawl around?"
"Guys, let's not even start. We need to find the real Peter," Y/N interrupted, deciding to stop the quarrel that was wasting precious time.
"Ouch," the boy muttered, grinning at Y/N when they made eye contact again. She only shook her head lightly in a joking manner.
"Ned, do the magic thing again," Y/N said, standing back to let the boy get his focus.
"Find Peter Parker!" repeating the message three times, Ned managed to open a portal. However, instead of appearing in front of the teens, it opened from behind them.
"Great, it's just some random guy," Ned muttered.
"Hello," the middle age man greeted.
"You're Peter." Y/N stated, piecing the situation together.
"Yeah...Peter Parker. I've seen you three..." he looked at the previous Peter. "Wait...he's not your friend." Before the other three knew it, the two Peters started shooting webs at each other, grinning as if finding the situation amusing.
"Wait, so you're Spider man too?" Ned asked
"Yeah, and this might sound kinda weird, but I've been trying to find your friend ever since I got here...I just have this sense that he needs my help," " the oldest Peter replied.
"He does, but we don't know where he is and honestly...right now we're all he really has left." MJ spoke up.
"Is there someplace that he might go that has meaning to him? Like a place where he would go to-"
"Get away from everything?" the tallest Peter interrupted, a mutual understanding look flashed across both Spider-mans' faces.
"For me, it was the top of the Chrysler building,"
"Empire state. Better view..." the Peter who arrived first responded, eyes landing on Y/N, who was standing near him.
"Yes...yeah, I think I know exactly where that would be."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After convincing Peter to give the other two Spiderman a chance, the whole group snuck into a lab from Midtown High School. Y/N felt the tears threatening to spill again after being told about all the events that she has missed while being grounded at home. It was heartbreaking to hear how Aunt May had passed away. She was like Y/N's second mother.
"I'm so sorry Peter..." Y/N trailed off, sniffling slightly as she saw the evident pain in Peter's eyes.
"It's okay, we just need to create a cure for all of them, the last thing I wanted was for her to die in vain," Peter muttered.
"She definitely didn't die in vain. We can do this, Peter," Y/N said, hoping her words would ease the boy. It somewhat worked, as determination made its way on the boy's face.
"Right, so what should I help with? You guys all seem to know what you're doing."
"We all know you became smarter than me-"
"My life's achievement," Y/N jested, grinning as smiles grew around the room at her comment. But her gaze stuck on the tallest Peter, her heart ached over how gorgeous his smile was.
"So finding a cure would be a lot faster and frankly...I miss you a lot," Peter continued. His sentimental words made Y/N smile, feeling appreciated.
"Alright, let's do this," Peter 1, or this universe's Peter, spoke up, determined to dive back into work.
"I don't know who to help," Y/N whispered to MJ, who immediately smirked at the question.
"How about the one you were staring at?"
"I wasn't staring at him."
"So we know which Peter we're talking about huh?"
"I deducted and also, let's not talk about this because they all have super hearings," Y/N immediately spotted all of Peter's mouths quirking up from the corner, which caused her to roll her eyes playfully.
"Well, just help Peter 3, maybe get to know him and who knows," MJ suggested.
"Yeah yeah, alrighty," Y/N sarcastically concluded, but approaching Peter 3 nevertheless, pulling a chair with her.
"Hi," she plopped down, greeting the stranger who managed to colour her intrigued.
"Hello," Peter 3 greeted. He deliberately met eyes with her, knowing fully well that despite her words to MJ, they definitely held eye contact for longer than normal. Much to his enjoyment, a part of him felt immense guilt for even glancing at another girl who wasn't Gwen.
"Do you need help?" Y/N asked, holding that eye contact deliberately as well.
"Yeah, I just can't remember this one thing that I added back then, maybe you can figure it out?" Peter 3 gave her the note that he had written down. Y/N looked down on the paper.
"I don't think there's a Y/N in my world - at least, I didn't know her," Peter started, clearly trying to start a conversation.
"Well, there's a Peter in my world and he's really sweet. If other versions of himself are the same, I think they should grow on me just the same," Y/N grinned, skimming through the paper. As Peter was about to reply, Y/N spoke again.
"Four..." grabbing the pencil in his hand. Their hands grazed at this, distracting the boy.
"Hm?"
"It's supposed to be four, rather than three drops here to balance up with other chemicals. Also, I think you're missing either Pralidoxime or Sodium bicarbona-"
"That's it! Sodium bicarbonate - thank you so much," he jumped out of his seat for a second, giving her the most beautiful smile she had ever seen again for the second time.
"You're welcome..." Y/N trailed off again, watching as the boy eagerly worked on his cure. She couldn't get rid of the smile he just gave her, or the face of pure joy. It was cute how he jumped up like a little kid on Christmas day.
It was quick, but she noticed his glance at her covered wrist. Y/N looked down at it and gave a dry chuckle, "Do you guys have soulmates in your Universe?"
"Yeah, we do."
"Well, I just...gave up on it in a way. It feels weird for me to fall for somebody just because they're my soulmate. I want it to happen naturally. And if the concept is true then maybe when I fall for somebody, they would happen to also be my soulmate," Y/N explained, even though she realized she didn't have to. Somehow she felt the need to justify herself to the boy.
"Hey. No, no, no, no. Look at me. I'm here." Y/N glanced at Peter and MJ. The two were clearly sharing an intimate moment. Despite being around the couple all the time, Y/N couldn't help but feel sour at the scene.
"I'm not going anywhere. We're gonna get through this. We're gonna get through it together." MJ concluded. "Okay?" MJ asked, to which Peter nodded.
She glanced down at the covered tattoo again and sighed quietly. Deciding it wasn't worth it to be gloomy, she looked back at Peter 3 again. However, she spotted the look of wanting and guilt on his face.
"Are you okay?" she asked.
"Gwen...she was my soulmate, and losing her broke me. I never thought I could feel such pain. Especially being Spiderman, I was prone to injuries. This was unhealable," Peter 3 gulped, his voice breaking.
Y/N had seen people who she loved sad before. She would try to cheer them up. However, seeing this Peter in pain made her want to rip the world apart for causing such a feeling for the boy. The sight brought searing displeasure to her. It was heartbreaking for Y/N to know what he had been through. It made her want to do anything for him to never feel such emotions again. She wanted to bring the pain, sorrow, guilt and bitterness away.
"I'm so sorry..."Y/N muttered, though her mind was more overwhelmed by this unfamiliar feeling of protectiveness.
Peter 3 couldn't look at Y/N this time. His head reminding that this would be disloyalty.
"I'm sure she would be proud of you for everything..." Y/N muttered, trying to comfort the boy.
Just then, the substance Peter was whisking turned a slight shade of green, indicating that it was done.
"Looks like we're finished," Peter half grinned at the cure.
"You finished? That's good then, we're also almost done," Peter 1 spoke up, peering at the cure with intrigued eyes, clearly impressed.
"Gosh, I'm so hungry," Ned muttered. MJ muttered something along the same line, letting out a sigh in the process.
"I can get us all something, yeah?" Y/N asked, though her voice came through as a stern motherly statement. The girl grabbed her jacket, and jogging to the door.
"Wait, I'll come with," Y/N looked at Peter 3, who ran after her.
"Ooh, I can give you a mini tour of my New York city!" Y/N said.
"Also, you do realize people might see your Spidey suit under that lab coat, right?" Y/N questioned, hand holding the door knob.
"Wait, you can borrow some of my clothes," Peter 1 suggested, nudging Ned to open a portal.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The sight was one of a kind - Peter 3 in Peter 1's clothing. They were a few sizes smaller, so the view caused the girl to giggle when she initially saw it. To be entirely real, she had not stopped giggling since then.
"I'm so sorry, it's just...you're a lot taller," the girl gasped between giggles, watching as Peter 3 rolled his eyes playfully.
"Never would I imagine myself getting bullied because of my height," the boy commented.
"Well, there's a first for everything, isn't there?" as the words left her mouth, the two arrived at their destination.
"Welcome to Richard’s, only the best sandwich shop in New York City!" Y/N dramatically introduced.
"Wait - this is your favorite spot?" Peter 3 asked. He opened the door and gestured for her to walk in first, to which Y/N obliged.
"Yeah, I can literally go here every day."
"This is my favorite spot as well!"
"No way! The Peter here keeps insisting Delmar is the best, but I beg to differ. Nothing can top Richard’s," the girl was glad to know that another version of Peter agreed with her.
"Y/N! It's been quite some time, how are you?" the shop owner asked, the sympathetic smile on his face clearly indicating his awareness of Y/N's situation.
"I've been better," the girl replied honestly.
"Anyways, what do you want to order?" she asked Peter, watching as he peered at the menu that was exactly the same as his universe.
"I'll have a meatball sandwich, but without pickles, please, and extra cheese," the boy ordered, watching as Richard chuckled at this.
"Oh, are you ordering a 'Y/N's'?"
"A 'Y/N's'?" Peter peered at the girl, who still wore an amazed look on her face.
"Yeah, she's been ordering that for like three years already, we decided to name it after her."
Peter looked down at the girl, "You're telling me that's your favorite?" As a response, Y/N nodded slowly, copying the smile growing on the boy's face.
"No way, this is unbelievable. I always order that!" Peter chuckled.
"Well, make that two 'Y/N's sandwiches', two ham and egg, and two grilled chicken. Thank you!" Y/N paid for the purchase, quickly rushing Peter to one of the tables.
"My Richard’s didn't name it after me though, the decency," he huffed, grinning as Y/N laughed at this.
"Ah, but I personally think 'Y/N's sandwich' sounds better than 'Peter's sandwich' though," the girl teased, immediately giggling when Peter's mouth dropped in a feigned offended look.
"Damn, I never knew you were so mean."
"I bet the me in your universe is even feistier."
"Yeah...I think it would have been fun to know you in my world..." Peter trailed off, a faraway look on his face when he looked at the girl. He imagined the things they would have done together if he had known her. He thought of how good friends they would have been, especially with how well they were clicking now.
"I'm sure she would have bossed you around, and I would be sure damn proud," Y/N beamed, standing up when she saw Richard finishing up her order and putting it on the counter. Peter stood up as well, waiting for the girl to return with the food.
He often found himself in moments like these lately: what could have been and what ifs.
How have I not met her before? - Peter wondered.
"Well, let's head back now. I'm sure the others are dying of starvation," Y/N over-exaggerated, dramatically pretending to faint, which abrupted a laugh from Peter.
"Besides, we can't deprive them of such good sandwiches," the girl muttered, skipping a few steps ahead before slowing down to walk beside Peter again. The boy quickly laced his fingers between hers and the plastic bag, trying to untangle it from her hand.
"It's fine, I can carry it," the girl responded, but the bag slipped out of her hand and into his, nevertheless. "Hey! It's fine. I insist," the boy spoke up, watching as a look of appreciation beamed on her face.
The two walked across a field of green grass, and a small chuckle emitted from Y/N.
"Ooh, dandelions," she pointed. Indeed, there were plenty of dandelions on the small field they were walking past. Deciding to take a break from saving the world, Y/N walked towards it and casually plucked one from the field, showing Peter the little plant in her hand. It was surprising how Y/N could see the dandelions despite how dark it was.
"Wanna make a wish?" Y/N asked.
"I think you should make it though, you're the one who found it," Peter 3 replied, switching the bag to his other hand.
Silence engulfed them for a second as Y/N looked at the dandelion intently. The boy could not help but admire her at that moment: how cute she looked while in deep thinking.
Y/N glanced back up at him, "I think you might need it more than I do."
Doing what she did previously, Peter 3 stared at her for a bit in silence, mirroring the intense look. Y/N was under the street light, making her illuminate like an angel gracing her presence on Earth.
"Okay...I'll make a wish," Y/N grinned at the reply, watching as the boy took a step closing to her and into the same light she was standing under. He peered down at her. The height difference caused for her to look up at him. Peter closed his eyes and scrunched his eyebrows, clearly taking this silly thing very seriously. Meanwhile, Y/N couldn't take her eyes off the boy. It was too soon to say, but she could see herself falling for him. Yet once again, her heart ached, knowing that he once had a soulmate, who he did love a lot and lost. She also knew she was falling for 'impossibility' because, in the end, he would have to leave.
Y/N snapped out of her trance as Peter blew on the dandelion, setting free the little mini dandelion flying.
"Now let's hope it comes true," something about the way he gazed into her eyes seemed so genuine and meaningful, yet Y/N couldn't understand why.
Suddenly, the wind gushed. The black bandana that was once wrapped around Y/N wrist somehow flung open and flew with the wind, causing the girl to gasp and attempt to chase after it. Just seconds after, however, she realized that her item was gone for good, Y/N sighed in disappointment.
Peter, who was behind her, peered at her tattoo.
"A spider, huh?"
"Yeah, he's probably an arachnologist or something," Y/N sighed.
"It's kind of a big coincident though, you being friends with Spiderman and then having a spider tattoo for a soulmate."
"Well, Peter's soulmate is MJ so...here we are," Peter had sensed bitterness in her words.
The boy pushed the guilt away as he stepped closer to her. His fingers delicately touched the tattoo, as if scared that if he held her wrist a little too hard, he would break her. Y/N shivered at this. Partially because this was the first time somebody else touched her soul mark. While, the other reason was unknown to her. Something about his touch affected her in a way nobody had done before.
Sparks.
"...Were you in love with him?" Peter asked quietly, watching as her shoulders tensed. Silence, once again, took over the conversation. Unlike before, it wasn't lighthearted. The atmosphere was tense and strained.
"I was in love with the idea of who I thought he was."
Peter was finally able to put the pieces together and understood the reason why Y/N disliked the concept so much.
"Anyway, uhm - what about you? What is your tattoo?" Y/N tried to divert the subject to Peter instead, wishing to keep the memories of her heartbreak forever buried. She pulled her wrist from his hands.
"I got a spider web," Peter informed, following Y/N as she started walking out of the field. The two headed back to the lab again.
"It faded to gray when she died," Peter muttered.
"You know 60% of our conversation is so gloomy," Y/N tried to break the tension. "Maybe we should talk about something else! What do you like? What's your hobby?"
"Skating and photography."
"No way! I love photography. Never tried skating though, pretty sure I would fall flat on my face," the girl grimaced at the thought, which caused Peter to laugh.
"Wait! Oh. My. Gosh! Do you have this ice cream store in your universe?? Please say you do, or else you're missing out so much," Y/N rambled upon spotting her favorite ice cream truck.
"We actually don't," Peter replied, staring at the subject of the conversation.
"I can't believe you've never had the chance to try this before. Clearly, my New York is superior. You know what? My treat - even though the others are waiting. It'll just take five minutes," the girl rambled again, dragging the boy with her.
What she didn't notice though, was the look of sheer admiration on Peter's face as she held his wrist, pulling him to the truck.
"What flavour do you want?" Y/N asked, already having a flavour for herself in mind.
"How about you choose?" Peter answered, though this choice was intentional. The boy was testing something.
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah."
"Alright, Sam, can I have two cups of cookies and cream? Thank you."
"No way," Peter immediately chuckled at her order.
"What?"
"That's my favourite ice cream flavour."
"It's mine as well..." the girl trailed off, disbelieving the amount of similarities between the two of them.
"Here you go, Y/N," Sam, the ice cream truck's owner gave them the ice cream as Y/N paid.
For a second, the moment was too nostalgic for Peter. It reminded him of the night he had ice cream with Gwen. Except this time, it was in another universe. Strangely enough, the moment felt different and...right.
"Talking about photography, what's your type? Like portrait? Or wildlife...?" Y/N asked, munching on the ice cream eagerly.
"Definitely portrait, especially natural moments and interactions between peopl-" Peter halted, his eyes lighting up.
"This is...amazing," he gestured to the ice cream. Y/N lit up at this.
"I KNOW! And yes, I love to capture interactions as well. There's something so pure and beautiful about it..." she trailed off, noticing how Peter was staring at her.
"What?"
"No no. Nothing, carry on."
"As I was saying, I love photography. Photos in general, since I rely heavily on them to recall lovely moments, because they never seem to fade...unlike my memory."
Peter laughed in amusement at the girl's words. The moment caused for the girl to halt for a second. If only she had her camera at that second, because the sight was heavenly for her.
"Surely your memory is not that bad," Peter tried to defend her.
"Don't ask me what I had for dinner last night, cause I genuinely can't remember," Peter laughed again at this. Y/N bit her lips as warmth spread through her heart. The desire to have a camera at that moment grew larger than before.
"If I'm not wrong, there's a photo booth around here," Peter spoke up, snapping the girl out of her trace. It was as if he had read her mind.
Peter picked up his pace. Y/N quickly matched his speed.
"Nice, it's also here in your universe," Peter breathed out, looking at the familiar sight.
Peter dug through the tiny jacket that belonged to Peter 1. He let out a chuckle and showed her the coins.
"Wow, stealing money, huh?" Y/N teased as Peter lifted the curtain for her to walk in.
"How could I be stealing from myself? Peter replied cheekily, grinning as the girl rolled her eyes.
"Ready?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Which one do you like more?" Peter 3 asked, each hand holding a set of photos that they took from the booth.
"This one, but they're both cute," Y/N looked at each photo individually. She giggled at the one they did Spiderman's hand pose.
"Say...have you ever been to the top of the Empire State Building?" Peter asked, catching Y/N off-guard.
"No...why?" the girl asked, feeling unease if this was a suggestion as to where she thought this was going.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"YOU HAVE TO WARN ME NEXT TIME," Y/N whisper-yelled as her foot settled down on top of the Empire State Building.
"I think I almost had a heart attack," Y/N muttered to herself, trying to get her heartbeat back to normal.
Clearly, someday I'll have a heart attack because of Peter - no matter which version from which universe. - The girl grumbled at this thought.
"And also people might see you and think that there's a second Spiderman or something. Then they might come after you. I don't want you going through what Peter 1 is going through. It's horrible," Peter simply stared at her. His eyes softened as he realized that she cared.
"Also I don't get how you do that everyday, just swinging in the air," Y/N finally looked at the boy, partially trying to break the soft moment with a joke. Unlike before, she did catch the deep gaze he was giving her.
"Peter?"
"Hm?"
"You okay?"
"...Yeah," for once he was being honest with the question.
The boy approached her, hands smoothing down her hair that was in multiple directions due to the wind while swinging up here.
"Thanks," the girl smiled at him. Her eyes were then averted to the scenery behind him.
"Woah. This is wicked cool!" she ran to the edge, staring at the view doe-eyed.
"In my universe, this would be the place I'd go to every time everything gets too much," Y/N let the word sunk in, remembering him briefly mentioning this before.
"Thank you for sharing this to me, Peter."
The two stared at each other. Both had the same thoughts in their minds. Just being with one another had healed their wounds, even if it was temporary.
"I completely forgot, we need to head back," Y/N reminded, watching as Peter's face dropped at her words.
"Right, can't let the others starve, can we?" Peter quoted. As a reaction, Y/N gave him a wide smile, but she didn't reply yet. A part of her wanted to embrace this good moment. It had been a while since she had this much fun. It was almost as if Peter had become the light in this little darkness of hers.
"Let's go, Spidey."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As much as Y/N disliked the idea, it was the fastest way back to the lab. So here she was, screaming again at the top of her lungs as Peter had his hand wrapped around her, while she clung onto him like a koala, swinging through Queens.
"Yeah no, we're never doing that again," Y/N muttered as she unwrapped herself from the tall boy. She couldn't fathom how MJ managed it, being the more frequent passenger to the swings.
As they were about to start walking, a kid skated right at the two, almost knocking over Y/N. Luckily, Peter had his spider senses, which automatically made the boy wrap his hand around Y/N's waist and pull her towards him to prevent the accident from happening.
There it was again. Those damn sparks that made Y/N's heart flutter.
Peter gulped at the familiar feeling.
"Guess a superhero never stops working, huh?" the girl jested, soon realizing his hand was still around her.
"I guess not..." he trailed off, seemingly looking down at her lips before flicking his eyes back on hers again. It was too quick that Y/N thought her eyes were lying to her.
There was no way he did that. - her mind tried to replay the moment while keeping itself calm.
"Do you see now why I don't like skateboards? They're out for me!" Y/N joked.
"Oh come on, they're not that bad. Some people are just reckless."
"Yeah yeah, I can't risk breaking any body parts anyway."
"I promise it's not that bad, Y/N. How about I teach you?"
The words left his mouth before Peter had thought it through. Both of them froze at his words. His eyes flickered elsewhere.
"Right..." he trailed off.
She's never dreamt of anybody like him. If she thought that Peter 1 was the one she clicked with the fastest, then Peter 3 was out of this world. They complimented each other so well. So a part of her easily understood how he had forgotten about the fact they were from different worlds. Y/N thought of how similar they are with stars to the night sky. From the perspective of others, the two seemed close. From their perspectives, they were light years away.
"Hey, under different circumstances, I would absolutely let you teach me, Peter," Y/N tugged on his arm, making him look at her.
"Now, stop being sad, we've done enough of those already, Parker. Let's go."
---------------------
Thank you for reading Part 1!
Series Masterlist: Prologue, Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Happy Ending, Sad Ending.
#peter parker x reader#peter parker imagine#peter parker x y/n#peter parker x you#peter parker oneshot#peter parker#peter parker fanfiction#peter parker x fem!reader#spiderman x reader#spiderman x y/n#spiderman imagine#spiderman x you#tasm!peter parker#tasm!peter parker x reader#tasm!peter parker x y/n#tasm!peter parker x you#tasm!peter parker fanfiction#tasm!peter parker imagine#tasm fic#andrew garfield#nwh#nwh imagine#spiderman: no way home#marvel#no way home
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Istredd recs
Here are some Witcher recs of Istredd with Geralt and a few stories with Yen 'cause I love Istredd a whole lot!
Geralt/Istredd
Alright, let me tell you about @brighteyedjill 's series Collaborative Scholarship, because this is 100000% my jam.
Research Methods (5,302w. Explicit) features Istredd enlisting Geralt to retrieve some arachas eggs. Of course Istredd discovers Geralt’s unorthodox method of collecting the eggs via oviposition. What you need to know about this fic is that Geralt and Istredd are complete and utter NERDS. And adorable. The story is also incredibly sweet and endearing and god, the banter is so good.
Advanced Study (5,589w. Explicit) is where Istredd gets fisted by Geralt and it’s so fucking cute and dorky and nerdy and hot. The Istredd POV is just absolutely exquisite the entire way through. Denial, cute horny thirst, nerdy. Geralt is dry and funny, but also nerdy and sweet. This fic really does have everything for these two.
The Scholar in the Ruins by @bittylildragon. (9,944w. Explicit). Istredd enlists Geralt’s help with some wraiths at some elven ruins. THIS IS SO SOFT. Like!!! Geralt has such low self-esteem but he ends up having such a good fucking time with Istredd. They're so soft. I adore the way Geralt tries to understand Istredd’s motivations about the elves and how Istredd manages to surprise and disarm Geralt with his sincerity and charm. This fic is a joy to read. (Also it is incredibly hot!!)
The Giant Bumblebee (1661w. Teen) by C_hawk. Istredd saves Geralt from bleeding out and Geralt returns the favor by helping Istredd look for a monster of interest. This is a cute, banter-y fic that sends me in a happy tizzy because their dynamic is hilarious and lovely. I'm smitten with how Istredd doesn't really know what to do with Geralt.
The Thing You Loved (1057w. Teen) by @brighteyedjill. Istredd gets kidnapped! ISTREDD WHUMP. ISTREDD WHUUUUUUMP and Geralt. I adore thiiis fic, I ADORE THIS. This is more Istredd whump than just slash but it just sets off happy firecrackers in my brain because their dynamic!! Is so good!!
points of the same star (468w. Mature) by and_a_dash_of_Angst. This is a great smutty ficlet with some bondage and d/s vibes. The twist at the end is AMAZING!!
If You Go on Like This (4582w. Teen) by @brighteyedjill. Geralt rescues Istredd and they learn a little about each other along the way. I. ADORE. THIS. God… I could just eat up this pairing all day long forever. Jill manages to build up their dynamic so subtly, slowly, delightfully and I am in LOVE. This is more of a Geralt & Istredd situation instead of the slash but ooooh, so delicious.
as flies do by flirtygaybrit (7020w. Teen). Geralt shows up to the conclave of mages on Thanedd and finds an potential ally in Istredd. The ongoing metaphor in this is superb, and Geralt’s humor is just absolutely spectacularly hilarious and dry and witty. ALSO. Omg! Istredd’s first line in this fic: “I can’t say I’d be any richer for being accused of ogling a witcher’s backside.” It only gets better from there. Their dynamic!! is top fucking incredible! If you love delicious imagery and prose, please check out this fic. It’s mindblowingly good.
Yennefer/Istredd
One Last Thing, Before I Go (3283w. Mature) by @arse-blathanna. Alright, so this is a sad Istredd and Yen get back together and breakup again, so it’s painful and ache-y in the most exquisite way. I love this Yen POV and it’s so difficult to let go of that first love. They don’t really fit together in the same way anymore, but they’re trying...even though it’s not enough. So if you’re in the mood for some angst, this is a fic you want punching you in the heart. 😭❤️
A Little Chaos (1223w. Mature) by @brighteyedjill. Istredd and Yennefer. Whumpily sweet sex pollen that is so lovely and emotionally satisfying.
Come Back For You (2:52) by me, @kuwdoravids. This is my Yen/Istredd, Istredd/Geralt, Istredd/History fanvid. Didn't I, didn't I, didn't I say I would be the one to make you feel this way. The love and pain of caring for another person (and about history!). Moving through the shit to be there because that's just what you have to do. Even though people aren't really listening to you. Come for Istredd's gorgeous face, stay for the vibes and feelings!
#istredd#geralt x istredd#istredd x yennefer#the witcher#the witcher netflix#twn#geralt#geralt of rivia#yennefer#yennefer of venegerberg#witcher recs#my witcher vids
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The Body Series
Book 1:
Ch 4 'Veins'
18+ please!! minors DNI (For other chapters)
[Prev. Chapter] [Next Chapter]
[First Chapter] [Ao3 link]
Summary: Life had returned to normal after 'that night'. You were thankful to have the happiness return to your life.
You should know better than to get too comfortable.
Pairing: Steven Grant x F Reader, Marc Spector x F Reader
Warnings: injuries, blood, assault (yeah that sounds about right for what it is)
It was dark and still in the apartment.
The only sound being the pump from Gus and Gus the second’s fishtank which was also the only light source.
You and Marc were laying in bed. Facing each other while Marc was slowly falling asleep beside you. You had your hand coiled in his dark hair, massaging the side of his head with your thumb. Which was contributing to him falling asleep faster.
“Aren’t you tired?” he whispered, his voice cracking from lack of use.
“I am…” you whispered back, continuing to massage his scalp.
He opened an eye for only a second.
“Then why are you just staring at me?”
“Just thinking how happy I am…how happy you make me…you make me happy, Marc Spector.” you whispered.
His breath halted for a second and he opened his eyes to look into yours. His big brown eyes seemed almost sad for a moment before a small smile fell across his face. He lifted his hand to yours and moved it so he could give you a soft kiss on your wrist. He then moved it down to hold it tightly to his chest and held it there until you were both finally able to fall asleep.
It had only been a few months since ‘that night’, as you all referred to it as.
Things had been strained in the apartment for a few days. It took a lot of talking and reassuring that you would all work together to get things back to normal.
Or at least your new normal.
Steven was beyond remorseful for what he had done. He went above and beyond to show the both of you how sorry he was for letting himself get to the point of wanting to hurt Marc that badly. He also said he never wanted to see you look at him that way again.
It didn’t take long for you to forgive him. As long as Marc wasn’t hurt then things were considered cleared.
Marc had asked, with Steven’s blessing, if you would be his girlfriend officially not too long after that. Of course you said yes.
You wondered if dating both identities of the shared body would be a challenge. If there would be animosity or jealousy between them or if you would struggle to be enough and what they each needed, but you all had nothing to worry about.
Things began to feel normal again soon after. The only major difference being that Marc wasn’t on edge as much trying to hide his feelings for you.
Schedules did have to get made and discussed but no other big hurdles came up.
You went back to being the dorky couple you always had been with Steven but the relationship with Marc had been a slow one.
It had been unsteady at first. He didn’t trust himself to be affectionate with you and even now he was hesitant.
He rarely initiated any sort of affection if you didn't start it first. The most he would do on his own was walk by and give you a tight hug or a kiss on the head as he passed. The good thing was you were the queen of showing your love. Enough to never let him go by without more kisses or hugs.
Which, like Steven, he loved. Even if he struggled with saying how much.
He also still wasn’t comfortable yet being fully intimate, even if you tried initiating. He was having a hard time dealing with what had happened between the two of you. Everytime things went past a certain point he would start to visibly struggle with his breathing and his body would begin to shake. You had learned when to stop and ask if he was alright with moving forward.
He would hesitate for a moment, close his eyes and stop you both from going further.
He felt awful every time but you let him know you didn’t mind. Which you didn’t. You were content just having him near you.
“I don’t deserve you…” he would always say.
“That’s not up to you to decide.” you’d reply, followed by a kiss and a hug.
You always felt like the opposite was true for both Marc and Steven. They were such perfect counters to your personality it almost felt like you had somehow tricked them into feeling the way they did about you.
Neither would ever believe if you admitted this to them, but it’s how you felt.
It was you that didn’t deserve them.
You woke up the next morning to Steven, already up and rummaging around in the kitchen.
You rolled over and stretched which quickly got his attention.
“Better get up, love. Unless you want to take your breakfast on the run again.”
‘I really don’t deserve them…’ you thought, just laying on the bed and admiring your adorably handsome boyfriend.
“What is it?” he asked with a smile.
“Have you always been this handsome?” you asked.
He turned away from you. A blush forming across his face accompanied by an even bigger smile.
“I think I look the same as I did yesterday.” he laughed.
“No, I’d remember a man as handsome as you in our kitchen if that was true.”
“You sure you aren’t thinking of, Marc?”
“Oh, that’s right. It was Marc. Sorry, I was mistaken.”
“Hey!” he exclaimed, Marc’s laughter ringing in his ears. “That’s not nice!”
He ran over and hopped on you, trapping you under the covers you still had wrapped around you while he tickled you relentlessly.
“Okay, okay! I give up, it was you! It was you!!”
He leaned down and gave you a kiss, signifying that he had relented.
You looked up into his beautiful brown eyes and smiled.
“Have I told you how much I love you lately?” he whispered, playing with your hair.
“Yes, but I wouldn’t mind hearing it again.”
“I love you, Y/N. So much.”
You smiled and strained your neck to be able to kiss him again but the blankets still kept you trapped.
“Do you love me enough to release me?” you asked.
“That’s asking too much.” he laughed, letting you out of the blankets just to be pulled down again by a very happy girlfriend.
Needless to say you were late and had to take a quick breakfast on the go.
You and Steven walked hand in hand until you both had to turn down opposite directions of the street so you could catch your bus and he could catch his train. Always separating with a kiss and another whisper of ‘I love you.’
You made sure to whisper in his ear “I love you too, Marc,” before leaving toward your place of work.
Steven to the museum, you to a stuffy little office in the library of one of the many universities in the area.
You were officially a research assistant for an archivist in the university but you might as well have been considered ‘the archivist’ yourself. Your boss rarely came by but as long as you had notes focusing on your research on the thousands of books in the sections of the library not opened to the public he was satisfied.
Normally this would have filled you with dread and anxiety over what to look up but Thoth took advantage of your resources. Your research helped him on his many errands and it helped you to have something to show. Regardless of your lack of guidance from your boss.
The day had gone by quickly and before you knew it you were headed home.
You always walked home after work. Looking down at your notes from the day. Going over the research Thoth had asked you to find. Stopping every now and then to nonchalantly push bins or pieces of brick out of the way. Reaching out to grab someone's coat before they stepped off of the curb, or purposefully dropping your things so the good samaritan who stopped to help would be a few minutes late to an event that could have turned into something far worse. Or the not so good samaritan would struggle to get around you for the same reason.
You were used to this. This was part of being Thoth’s avatar. You helped keep the flow of time moving smoothly. When possible you would help to change surroundings and outcomes so they didn’t balloon into a problem in the future.
You helped keep the timeline from branching off into unknown or devastating flows. Like streams from a river or veins on a leaf.
At least in the area around where you lived. Miniscule when it came to the world but ‘beyond important’ according to Thoth.
It was second nature now. Thoth’s knowledge was vast and you were beyond thankful that you didn’t have to actively think to know to do these things. They just happened.
You even wondered if meeting Steven was part of this ebb and flow. Thoth assured you it was pure destiny that brought you two together.
He always left out the push toward the museum, though.
By the time you get home sometimes Steven or Marc would be there, but for the most part you were left alone for a few more hours.
Thoth would usually choose this time to blip in and out to let you know if he had a task that took a more physical approach but today it looked like you could finally exhale and relax.
You looked down at your phone and saw a text from Steven.
‘Won’t be home till a little later, love. Donna’s on the rampage again and I’m getting the brunt of it. Marc will be the one to see you tonight. See you tomorrow, beautiful.’
It’s always Donna!
Steven was able to get his job back with some help from the other gods. They wiped the memories of everyone involved with his firing the night he was attacked and subsequently fired. It was what he and Marc had asked for as a thank you for helping to stop Harrow and Ammit.
The best part of this was, because he and Marc no longer had to serve Khonshu, he was finally able to earn the right to give tours every now and then like he’d always wanted. The only negative was Donna still treated him like trash.
You would offer to go and give her a piece of your mind but Steven would just laugh.
“No need,” he would say, “I get to give tours and come home to the perfect woman. I need nothing more.”
The thought of him saying that made you smile as you put down your things.
You went on with your night. Taking a quick shower and making dinner for you and Marc. Placing his plate in the fridge, ready to take out and reheat when they got home.
You continued to go over your notes at the kitchen table when you began to get a little worried.
You looked up at the clock on the oven. It was getting late and they weren’t back yet. You tried reminding yourself that Steven had said they would be home later but not this late. This was ‘stay back to do inventory’ late, not just ‘a little later’ like he had said.
You looked down at your phone. No text.
Your leg started to hop up and down under the table as you struggled to focus on your reading.
Something felt off.
It was then that you heard the front door unlock and open behind you.
You let out a long sigh of relief.
“Hey Hun, you want me to heat up your dinner while you take a shower?” you asked without turning around.
“Um, Sugar…I think something happened.” Marc said followed by a painful grunt.
You turned and immediately stopped breathing. Running to his side.
Marc was leaning against the wall hugging his side. His face was bruised and cut with blood dripping down onto his collar. His clothes were stained with obscene amounts of blood that you prayed wasn’t his but also couldn’t help but panic with a thought. If it wasn’t his then whose was it?
“Oh God, Marc! What happened?” you said, wrapping his other arm around your shoulder and helping him sit down at the table.
“I don’t know…I woke up in the alley down the street. Steven says the last thing he remembers is walking through the park to the tube.”
Your heart sank in your stomach.
‘They’re blacking out again!’ you thought.
Layla had let you know that they had been losing time when she had first learned about Steven.
Neither of them had been able to explain it. One of them was there one minute and then they’d be elsewhere or in a different position and they’d be surrounded by carnage. Death all around or they’d have major injuries with no recollection of how they got them.
Like now.
“Marc…are you hurt? What hurts?! Oh God! Can you tell if anything’s broken?!” you asked. The panic in your voice showed on your face as you fought back tears from seeing him like this.
“Hey, hey…” he started, his voice strained but calm. “I need you to take a breath, okay? You can’t help me if you’re panicking.”
You nodded, closing your eyes and taking a few breaths. He was right. You were no good to him on the verge of a breakdown yourself.
You turned and went to grab the first aid kit. Shoving all of your things out of the way and plopping it down on the table.
“It’s okay, I don’t think anything’s broken but I may have bruised some ribs somehow.”
“And what about all this blood on your clothes?” you asked. Loosening the tie around his neck. Not recognizing it or the rest of what he was wearing at all.
“That I can’t answer. I’m pretty sure only a little on the collar is mine.” he tried laughing but quickly let out another grunt.
“We need to get you out of those clothes.”
“You minx, you.” he teased, trying to lighten the mood.
“Marc…” you quietly replied, trying to keep it together. The worry on your face growing.
“Sorry, sorry, I know. Not the time.”
“Come on, lets get you in the bathroom. We can get rid of these clothes and get you cleaned up.”
You helped to lift him up again, slowly helping him get to the bathroom.
Marc continued to grunt and writhe in pain but did his best to keep it to a minimum to keep you from worrying more. You helped him take off his clothes. Throwing them into a bag to burn later.
You helped him get cleaned up and patched up before helping him get into bed.
He wasn’t too badly hurt. His cuts looked like he didn’t need any stitches so you dressed them as best as you could with his guidance.
He was right about his ribs as well. No broken bones but definitely some intense bruising which you now had under some ice packs. You asked how his breathing was and he said it didn’t hurt much anymore.
This is one of the times you wished they were still serving Khonshu. Their heightened healing would have come in handy.
“How are we doing?” you asked, sitting beside him. Holding onto his hand while his arm rested on your lap.
“We’re doing peachy…bruised like one anyway.” Marc said, opening one eye to look at you like he’d done the night before.
You quietly laughed and shook your head.
“That was really bad.”
“Worth it to see you laugh.”
“Did Steven tell you to say that?”
“Nope, all me.” he laughed, wincing at the pain. “Steven says he’s offended. He has a better sense of humor than that.”
“Not by much.”
Your smile slowly left your face. Leaving only the worry you felt this whole time.
“Marc, have you and Steven been losing time a lot lately?”
He shook his head slowly.
“Not since…that night.”
He squeezed your hand a little tighter.
“And before that?”
“Not since before we stopped working for Khonshu.”
There it was.
Your blood began to boil within you. It had to be that damned bird's fault! You’d known Steven and Marc for well over a year now and nothing like this had ever happened before that night.
What a coincidence it happened to be the same night he had come creeping around. Was he trying to get the boys to serve him again? Did one of them make a deal?
Either way you needed to get out before you summoned that snake right there and then!
“Looks like you’re bleeding through the dressings on your head again. Will you be alright on your own while I go buy more from the market down the street?”
Marc gave you a thumbs up.
“Okay I’ll be right back, try not to fall asleep.” you said, kissing the tips of your fingers and lightly placing them on his lips. Which he kissed back.
You left and made your way a few streets down from the apartment. Your expression was enough to make people walk out of your way or even cross the street. The rage you emitted was palpable for anyone who got close to you.
You turned down an empty side street, making sure no one could see you before summoning your suit and easily making your way up to the rooftop of a neighboring building intending to summon Thoth.
Before you could call out he appeared in front of you.
“You seem upset,” he said.
“Damn right I’m upset! My boyfriends came home bruised, beaten, and covered in blood! In someone else’s clothes to top it off! I know Khonshu has something to do with this and I want to know why!”
Thoth stood silent.
“Well?” you insisted.
“You know I can’t tell you, scribe.”
You let out an angry and frustrated noise, which echoed into the night. Your apartment wasn’t too far away so you hoped Marc hadn’t heard it.
“What’s the point of being scribe to the keeper of all information and knowledge if you won’t share any of it with me?!”
Thoth continued to silently stare before letting out a deep sigh.
“You know I cannot share what I know when it comes to the gods. Not even with my scribe. We are…”
“Yes, yes. I know. ‘We are the observers of the gods. We do not interfere.’ Not even when it could affect your avatar directly?”
“I’m sorry, scribe. You will have to bring up your grievances with Khonshu yourself.”
You almost growled.
“Oh, what I’m going to do to that, that...”
Thoth reached out and placed a hand on your shoulder.
“Be careful my scribe. You should not be dealing with other gods when you are in this state. You are likely to be more reckless than usual.”
You exhaled and nodded.
Thoth disappeared, leaving you alone with your emotions.
You knew he was right but your anger was hard to brush aside.
Even when it was directed at a god.
You made your way back down to the street and out of your suit. Coming out of the alley around the corner to the 24 hour general store down the street.
You quickly grabbed what you needed to change the bandages and made your way to the front.
You continued to try to calm yourself down.
You couldn’t stop thinking about how Marc had looked when you first saw him. How the pit of your stomach burned with your anger. God or not he would know your rage.
As you stood in line your focus moved outside. It looked like it may start to rain at any moment when you saw Marc making his way in the opposite direction of the apartment.
Your heart stilled as you dropped your items and ran outside to the cries of the cashier behind you.
Marc was quickly walking up the street. He didn’t show any sign of being injured even though you could still see the bandages you had tied around his head.
You were going to call out to him but that same feeling you had earlier came creeping back.
Something felt different.
It definitely was Marc…or at least you thought it was Marc.
It wasn’t Steven. Steven had a certain way he walked but he wasn’t exactly walking the way Marc did either.
You quickly followed, making sure to stay out of sight until you saw him stop in front of the gated entrance to a private car park.
You stood across the street peeking from around the corner of the building. You watched as he pulled out a ring of keys and unlocked the gate, disappearing into the darkness.
It was Marc. Without a doubt you were watching your boyfriend but again things felt off.
Even after seeing his face you still weren’t fully at ease with thinking that that was, without a doubt, Marc Spector.
You waited a moment before walking across the street and stepping into the dark vast room.
You did your best to step lightly, not wanting anything to give away that you were there.
There was no sound in this large room. No echo or any indication that someone else could have been in the car park with you.
This wasn’t good.
‘I need to get out of here…’ you thought, turning to leave when someone grabbed you from behind and threw you against a concrete pillar.
You let out a cry of surprise! Your eyesight faltered as you fell to the floor before you felt someone wrap an arm around you. Lifting you up and carrying you toward a large black limousine.
Their other hand covered your mouth to stop you from screaming.
They quickly opened the door to the back of the limo and threw you inside. Shutting the door behind you, locking it as soon as it closed.
You rubbed the side of your head where you had hit it when your eyesight came back.
You sprang to the window, pounding your fists against it while you tried in vain to get the door to open.
“Let me out!” you screamed. Continuing to pound against the window.
“No use screaming, little bug. These windows don’t let much sound escape them.”
You turned and saw Khonshu sitting in the chair behind the driver’s seat.
Your anger began to rise inside you again but before you could start unloading your bile at the god he lifted his finger to his beak, signaling for you to quiet down.
The front door opened and closed as Marc turned on the car and drove the limo out of the car park. He got out again to go back and close the gate which gave you a little time to talk to Khonshu directly.
“You deplorable, unworthy snake of a god! What the hell is this Khonshu? What are you doing with Marc and Steven again? They earned their freedom from your service!”
“Little bug, you only have yourself to blame for what follows your choices this night.”
That was not a response you expected.
“I don’t understand.” you said through gritted teeth.
“You will, and don’t think about summoning your suit. You have a secret to keep, remember?”
You glared at him just as Marc got back into the limo and drove away down the road just as it started raining.
You sat back and kept your focus on Marc through the rearview mirror.
You tried your best to keep from directing your gaze at Khonshu, who stared at you and tapped his fingers against the knee of his crossed leg.
Almost like he was daring you to look at him while Marc was present.
You were the only avatar who could see all the gods and while they knew you could your identity had been kept a guarded secret. None of them could sense when you were near and your suit did its job at hiding your identity. Covering the majority of your face and changing other features, like the color of your hair, to help keep it concealed.
As the avatar to the god of knowledge and all events, future and past, you held unimaginable power, just as Thoth did. He had always feared that the other gods could use you to tap into those powers for their own gain.
It was because of this that it was vital you be kept a secret.
Even though, Khonshu was the only other god to know your identity. You didn’t know how, but he had always known.
Marc would look up at you every now and then but said nothing, keeping most of his own focus on the road in front of him.
He drove for close to a half an hour. Turning into a vacant lot on the outskirts of the city.
He got out and made his way to the trunk as the rain continued to pour down. You could hear him rummaging around, followed by the sound of multiple firearms being checked and loaded.
You immediately began to stare down Khonshu, who continued to stare back.
“You do remember that we are not enemies, little bug.”
“With the way you constantly put the loves of my life in danger it sure doesn’t feel like it!” you hissed.
“Just remember what I warned you of, and be careful how you act. I don’t know if my avatar will restrain himself. Even when it comes to you.”
With that Khonshu disappeared and the door suddenly opened.
Marc leaned in and stared you down with a look that sent shivers down your spine.
You froze. The man who was staring at you had your boyfriends face but it definitely wasn’t Marc you were looking at!
“Move over,” he demanded. His voice was gravely and new. A voice you had never heard before.
“I…I…” you managed to get out before he brought up his hand around your neck, pushing you down on the seat as he got on top of you.
The rain water dripped off of him and onto you as he started to paw at your clothes. Pulling open your jacket and reaching into the inside pocket where you carried your phone.
He lifted it above you and smiled triumphantly.
“I guess I’m lucky I have this face or you might have called the police by now. Didn’t want to call the cops on your boyfriend, eh?”
He spoke in a mocking tone, continuing to hold you down by your neck.
You struggled to breathe as you desperately held onto his arm, trying to keep him from pushing down any more than he already was.
“You’re lucky we share a body, Preciosa. Their love I feel within me is the only thing keeping you alive.”
“Where’s Marc…Steven?” you gasped out.
The man pointed at his head.
“Escondido.” He said with a laugh, “It’s just you and me, Hermosa…”
He leaned down so his mouth was right next to your ear.
“And I don’t play nice.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Taglist:
@delicatespiritualitysciencebat
#moon knight#moon knight fanfic#moon knight fic#steven grant x fem!reader#steven grant x you#marc spector x fem!reader#marc spector x you#the body series#the body series fanfic#the body series fic#the body series: book 1
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Fresh(?) Impressions (2)
Other parts: |Trickstar| |UNDEAD| |2wink| |Ra*bits| |Akatsuki| |fine| |Ryuseitai| |Knights| |Valkyrie| |Switch| |MaM/Double Face/Crazy:B| |Eden| |Alkaloid|
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Hello Enstarries~☆ It hasn't been 24h yet but lucky enough, I'm a master procrastinator so here's the next part with UNDEAD already. This whole series is probably more like me talking in an echo chamber but that's also alright. I couldn't eternalise my first thoughts from other games, which is quite a shame. So this will be a nice memory to look at when someday the game ends and enough time has passed for my opinions on them to have changed. I sure hope that that someday is still very far away.
Anyways here's my last post about Trickstar, if you're curious enough and want more info about me and enstars. And the next one as well, if I'm committed enough to continue.
|Prev| |Next| See above ⬆️
DISCLAIMER!: Everything said here is for entertainment purposes only and not meant to attack anyone. This is not an accurate description of any characters but my subjective rambling for fun, so please don't take it too seriously. (Just to be safe, I'm kinda scared of elite idol fans) Also, you will hear me mention other games a bunch of times bc I'm that bad and uncreative at explaining and I'm still grieving A3!EN's shutdown. Eng is my 2nd or 3rd language so you might see weird spelling or grammar. I like to think I'm pretty decent, though...
Without further ado....Let's Ensemble!☆
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Ah yes, the sexyish bad boy group. Military aesthetic once more but make them goth. All their uniforms are slightly different from each other but still cohesive, which is nothing groundbreaking but I just wanted to mention I love stuff like this. And these outfits in general. Really cool stuff. Also, everyone has different gloves. Purple is my fav color so I might be biased. Their songs are more rock 'n roll with a lot of guitars, which isn't exactly my go to genre but it's nice to listen to it sometimes. Melody in the Dark & Valentine Eve's Nightmare are my favs. They also sing with these oldies microphones, which is cool but looks a bit funny when they gotta take the whole thing to switch places. Surface aside, they're all much sweeter than their image leads on?? Like, I was surprised upon reading their Ep.1.
7.5/10 - I like them a bit, mainly for their color scheme but I think I'll like them for more as well
Rei Sakuma
I thought he was some mysterious flirt, who will tease and entice you to do flirty stuff but he's actually a nice old vampire next door. His vocabulary and tech knowledge may be from the 19th century but he drinks his respect women (& tomato) juice 👍I know he sleeps in a coffin and has a younger brother who hates him for some reason, so there's something he may have fucked up....He's also very pretty. Possibly one of the prettiest one out of the whole cast. His voice is very attractive as well, sounds like melted chocolate.
8/10 - i like him, he's pretty, polite, lives with a distinct lowkey flair, this card is amazing
Kaoru Hakaze
Flirty boys often make me weak. Not bc I actually fall for their flirting but I like what hides beneath that. Be it trauma (Ikki, Amesia), shyness (Inigo, FE:Awakening), dorkiness (Impey, Code:Realize). I knew instinctively he's one of them and his panicking monologue Ep.1 that lasts for ⅓ of the time was my proof. I don't think he's christian (like smn else) even though he has a cross necklace here. It would fit more with Rei's vampire package but whatever. He seems easy to fluster, which is just the cherry on top. His voice is also nice, melodic and sweet but only like 65% chocolate.
8.5/10 - Cute but hot as well, I wonder what more he hides
Koga Ogami
Wild and rowdy. I know he jumped on poor Anzu on her first day. Imagine falling on your face bc of some rude dog boy on your first school day smh. I used to mistake him for Izumi and vice versa. Similiar hairstyle and haircolor, though his color scheme is warmer. Idk why he insists on being taking the saying lone wolf so literally but if it works 🤷♀️ He really went at it during Nightless World's MV with his guitar. Surprised he composes but somehow also not. I guess, he's just very creative and passionate, hence his wolf persona.
6/10 - he's not average but also not that interesting
Adonis Otogari
What a gentleman. He reminds me of Guy (A3!) what with him being rather stoic and looking slightly intimidating but is actually quite caring. And he might have important parents in his homeland? Maybe it's not that special tho, considering he's attending a private academy and looking at the rest of the cast....He's probably the tsukkomi from his unit. Might have the patience of a saint. I didn't expect him to have such a deep voice and it felt a bit off at first, but maybe that's just bc I was still playing A3! and there's another character with the same VA, who's quite different. This is the second time I see this VA in an idol franchise, the idol in question is Gaku from Idolish7. His unit's vibe is also similiar. I forgot to mention it but FORBIDDEN RAIN is an absolute banger as well.
7/10 - I look forward to getting to know him better
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Conclusion
This group is one of the more normal units, I think, which is pretty telling of the other ones. Overall on a more favourable side. I dig their costumes and voices.
Reading their Ep.1 made me question whether I suddenly shifted games or smth. Especially Kaoru's??? He's so funny panicking and being all "I'm usually so much coolee why is she so cute? 😣". Rei's manner of speech and the library made me think of these isekai manwhas on the rise. Adonis was suddenly talking about world disasters (ain't that hitting close home) and his guilt of not being of more help and slight desire to just stay in safe Japan but ultimately not regretting helping his land. And Koga is struggling to find his individual self after finally finding a place to belong. Like, what is this tone shift from Trickstar!? I guess, this is a sneek peak to what we will see more of in future events and character development? Do characters have that here?
Anways, feel free to comment whatever and share some thoughts. Until next post!~☆
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Questions 3 and 30 for the ask game <3
Also hiiiii nic, how've you been? 🩷🩷 I'm so glad the ask box is open again. I hope you are feeling better since you said you were really busy a while ago, if I remember correctly?
Also OH MY GOD THEY WEREN'T KIDDING WHEN THEY SAID COLLEGE LIFE WAS WILDD 😭😭 ESPECIALLY WHEN IT COMES TO DATING 💀 tell me why I met this boy and got into a relationship with him after an embarassingly short amount of time, then he lovebombed me, had a mental breakdown, got bored and attempted to fake his own death 😭😭 safe to say we're over, though I'm still a little worried about his mental health lmaoo. It's a shame though, I thought I met my brunette version of Leon Kennedy irl, he was really sweet and dorky and all I could ask for. But whatever, life goes on. I think I might quit dating real men until I graduate tho 💀💀 Leon and Chris it is until then!
Sorry if this felt like a rant, but it was too hilarious not to share 😭😭 I hope you're having better luck with real men than I am nic 🥲 it's okay tho, who needs some crazy Texan nerd when Leon Scott Kennedy is right there?
Also, if you have any vague details to share about your upcoming fics, please do! I always stalk your blog for updates, your writing is just that good!! I can be patient though, no pressure. I hope you're having lovely writing time :3
Take care pookie, sending lots of love <3
-🌑
writer ask game
Omg hey new moon anon! It's always so nice to hear from you. 🫶 I'm doing alright for the most part, dealing with migraines so that's fun but I'm handling it. I hope you're doing good too. And yeah, I was busy and a little burnt out from answering all of those asks for like a week straight so I closed my ask box to regroup, but I'm more energetic now so that's good!
#3. how do you feel about your current WIP?
Oh my current WIP is a pain in the ass LMAOO. I've been working on it for like a month on and off and I'm about to revisit it today and re-edit it completely. Sometimes I think I overstress myself about writing certain things because I'm a perfectionist and want to put out stuff that I am happy with, but I'm really hoping I get this done. It's the first chapter of my series, which is hilarious cause I've been drafting this idea out for like 6 months and I still haven't uploaded it. I will though, eventually, I'm just scared about putting it out into the world since it's something I've planned so thoroughly.
#30. share a fic you're especially proud of
I believe I've answered this already but definitely One Of Those Days simply because of how cohesive it is and how easy it was to write. It's one of my favorite things that I've written, and because lord knows I want a dilf to take care of me after a stressful day so it's personal.
Now college boys? Babe, as someone older I'm going to tell you, stay away from them boys at school. Obviously, have fun and be safe duh, but don't let these LEWSERS derail you from your education. I'm sorry that happened though seriously, being lovebombed is the absolute worst thing ever, but he sounds crazy for that like. Don't think that what happened determines your worth romantically, believe me, you will be okay. <3
As for me? I haven't had a man within 6 feet of me in 2 years by choice HAHA. They just get dumber and dumber and frankly I don't want to be stressed so I choose to keep my peace, I can't deal with another dating horror story and trust me I've had plenty. Celibacy does get annoying though, I feel like as you get older, your hormones get out of wack and every ovulation cycle gets more intense. I'm literally at my limit but I'm trying to stay strong and not let the voices get to me. May break my celibacy this summer, I'm feeling reckless, but nobody is a #realfucker like me so I'd rather save myself the dissapointment. Sadly, real men are nothing like the fictional ones we all thirst over, so we must all suffer booo.
And as for my fic ideas, I have a lot written down and I'm actually deviating from Leon Kennedy because I'm fixating over Chris Redfield so I'll tell you some of the things I want to write for him in particular!
Essentially, I have a DDLG fic idea I want to crank out with Chris and it kind of extended to me wanting to create a mini universe of Chris and his sub partner just navigating life and learning more about kinks and how to grow in a dom/sub dynamic. I originally wanted to do that with Leon, but the ideas I had just didn't fit his characterization naturally in my head, it felt forced. And now that I've been doing a fuck ton of character analysis and plotting with Chris, my brain changed and everything that didn't fit Leon fits Chris in my head (because they're foils of each other). So yeah, I'm definitely planning on doing that, probably several different one shots about Chris and his gf in a dom/sub partnership and how they explore it together, and they can all be read as stand-alones or in the same "universe" type of deal.
I'm still hesitant cause of how people think about DDLG as a whole and how they view Chris, but I'm just learning to not give a fuck anymore and post it anyway. :)
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Could you write a Draco Malfoy x Slytherin !Potter!reader. Y/N and Draco have been dating since first year but haven’t told anyone because people think she might be the only “good slytherin” and to prevent Harry from freaking out they stay quiet till the Quitage World Cup where she goes with Draco and his father and spent the summer with them rather than the weasles . Pansy and Blaise know about Y/N and Draco because the 4 of them became best friends through the years (and reader won’t be only friends with Harry’s friends) . Harry and Y/N get into an argument when they return to Hogwarts the summer of the Triwizard cup and how she’s a traitor (EVEN tho that’s her house) and a disgrace for being with him. So she accepted that and that he hates her so she spends the next year mainly with her house giving the trio the cold shoulder and when the war happened draco and his mother protected her and hid her so Harry was looking for her that time but she was gon so after the war the 4 (Draco Pansy and blasé) walk into the great hall and the golden trio see that Y/N is engaged to Draco and Harry just apologizes and they catch up after all those years.
The Potter Twins
A/n: This has got to be one of the best requests I've ever seen anyone answer. I'm so gratefully you asked me to write it!! Thank you. Also, I did use lines from the book just to make the story work. I could have probably written a whole series so this is very long, I'm sorry. @loxbbg
"Y/n Potter." Professor McGonagall's shrill voice boomed. Just like that, the whole school's attention was on Y/n.
So many students, so much older than her, all focused on her. Probably, she had only just discovered, because of her last name.
The girl and the boy who lived. Apparently, they were famous.
On their 11th birthday, she hadn't expected a giant wizard man to come and whisk the twins away from the horrible Dursleys. But, he was nice and he knew their parents.
Y/n was always treated better than Harry. Aunt Petunia seemed to love her more, even letting her have a big bedroom.
Hagrid, she found out, had taken them shopping and brought them ice cream. While she thought it was all a hallucination when she was able to run through a wall, she knew something strange was happening.
After that, she had met a redhead, Ron. He was dorky but kind to the siblings. And, he seemed to know a lot about the wizarding world.
Y/n took a few tentative steps before sitting on the stool. She was hyperaware of the fact everyone was watching, not able to keep the blush off her cheeks.
The heavy hat was draped onto her head, weighing her down.
"Hmm, the other Potter. You would do good in Gryffindor." The hat whispered to her, making her widen her eyes. She hadn't expected it to talk. It was an object. How could it possibly talk?
Y/n was amazed at the whole thing. It still felt like a dream. The great hall was phenomenal, and she couldn't wait to explore the castle. It was unreal.
Y/n flicked her eyes to her brother. He was already sitting at the Gryffindor table, smiling at her. She hoped she would get to be with him, even though she didn't grasp the house concept. Plus, he was near the other girl, Hermione.
Hermione seemed to know a lot about wizards, and Y/n wanted to be informed. It was like she had finally discovered her missing part.
"I remember your parents. I think you could do just like them." The hat continued. Y/n kept hoping. Hoping she wouldn't go without Harry. The thought of her parents made her heartache, she knew so little about them, but she had heard so much about them in the last few days.
"Slytherin!" The hat roared. Y/n's eyes instantly widened, looking frantically at her brother. How was it possible? The hat had decided she would do good in Gryffindor. She wanted to be with her brother and Ron and Hermione.
Just like that, the hat was off her head. Y/n was speechless as she wandered over to the Slytherin table. Somehow, they all looked mean.
She hadn't noticed who she sat next to until the boy spoke. "I'm Malfoy. Draco Malfoy." He introduced himself, puffing out his chest proudly.
"Y/n Potter." Y/n introduced, despite knowing he already knew.
"I'm Pansy Parkinson." A girl with short black hair interrupted their conversation. "We're going to be sleeping in the same dorm, do you want to be friends?" She asked. A picture of confidence.
Y/n didn't know what to do but nod. "Yeah."
"Now shove off, Parkinson. We're talking." Draco interrupted the girls.
Y/n looked concerned at Pansy, but she didn't look offended at all. "Don't worry. Dracie and I have been friends since we were kids. He doesn't mean it." She reassured the girl, noticing her surprised look. The nickname made Y/n giggle, recognising the look on Draco's face as disgust.
"We're not friends." Draco joked, stoic face. Pansy hit him on the arm.
Y/n liked them already. She could tell they would be good friends. Plus, they filled the gap she was missing, not having Harry next to her.
Harry managed to get a chance to talk to Y/n after the feast. He quickly wrapped her in his arms, comforting his sister.
"I'm sorry we're not in the same house," Y/n told him, feeling guilty.
Harry shook his head. "It's not your fault. It's that weird hat's."
"It's strange, isn't it?" Y/n giggled, not feeling like crying anymore. "I don't know what so much of this means." She continued, feeling nervous about the whole situation.
"I know." Harry agreed with a nod. "We'll get through it together. I just want to know more about mum and dad, and it's good if we don't have to stay with Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon." Y/n nodded to that. They were horrible people. "We should go to our rooms now. It'll be okay." He comforted her.
She gave him another quick hug. "Thanks, Harry." She told him before turning around to walk off.
"Wait, Y/n!" Harry called, she spun back around to face him. "I've heard Malfoy is bad news, be careful." He warned. Y/n nodded, reassuring him she'd be cautious.
She didn't believe it, though, as she skipped off to the common room.
~
It was only a week into classes when Y/n figured out not everyone at Hogwarts was nicer than the Dursley's. Mainly Professor Snape. For no reason, he seemed to hate Harry. They dissected it later in Hagrid's cottage.
"'S 'cause yeh look like yer mum." Hagrid offered as an explanation. That confused the twins and Ron, who came with them. Hagrid sighed, realising he had to explain it. "Snape loved her, way back, but she married yer dad. He couldn' stand yer dad. Anyway, tha''s all history now. Unfortunately, he's one to hold a grudge. Don' let it bother yeh." He told the children.
Harry just sighed, running his fingers through his hair. "Okay, I'm used to Dudley, anyway." He figured Hogwarts was a lot better than the Dursley's house.
"What about yeh, Y/n, how's Slytherin? They're not pickin' on yeh?" Hagrid asked, switched his attention to the small girl.
"It's alright. I've made lots of friends." Y/n had actually had a rather good week. She'd befriended Pansy and a girl named Daphne. As well as Draco, with who she was very close. That was just in her house. Somehow, she'd managed to sit next to Hermione in a class, Lavender too, and a girl named Hannah Abbot from Hufflepuff.
"Good." Hagrid nodded. "Yeh best be off now." He told them, taking the last sip of his drink.
The 3 of them nodded, getting up and leaving the cottage.
"You know, we've got our first flying lesson next week?" Ron asked the twins, trying to brighten the mood. He could tell they were both thinking about their parents.
Y/n did know. Draco had talked about it nonstop. He was beyond excited.
Harry nodded as well. "I'm not sure I'm going to be any good." He mentioned, lightly blushing.
"I'm sure you'll both be fine. It is in your blood." Ron told them. Y/n and Harry both looked at him with furrowed eyebrows, confused about what he meant. However, he didn't elaborate.
~
Y/n went to watch Harry's first Quidditch practise, despite him telling her not to. He said it was a waste of time when it was just practice. But she was extremely proud of him. She knew their parents would be proud too.
So she hid in the Slytherin bleaches, hoping Harry wouldn't spot her.
It was slightly chilly, the night wind whipping at her skin. That's when she felt the drape on a coat on her shoulder.
Y/n whipped her head around to see who it was, only to be met with the blonde's features. She definitely had a bit of a crush on him. He was cute and the first boy who had ever paid her attention.
Draco took a seat next to her, giving her a smile. "Hi." He whispered.
"Hi, Dray." It was a nickname she had quickly picked up, noticing how it made him blush. "You don't have to sit out here." She assured him.
"I want to," Draco confirmed.
Y/n knew he was jealous. Draco had done nothing but talk about how much he loved Quidditch. And Harry, who he thought was a blood traitor, had gotten all his success. So it was big that he wanted to sit with her.
They watched in silence before Draco spoke. "Did you know Pansy is dating Blaise?" He asked her.
Y/n shook her head rapidly. "I thought she liked you."
Draco stuck his tongue out in disgust. "No, I hope not. I did have a question though..." He trailed off, cheeks heating pink. He was bouncing his knee up and down nervously.
Y/n had never seen him like that. "What is it?" She asked.
"Do you want to be my girlfriend?" Draco asked hesitantly. Y/n immediately nodded, accepting the offer. She had never felt happier and more relieved.
"Of course, Dray." She agreed immediately his face relaxed. Y/n reached over and laced her fingers in his, not concerned about how sweaty his palms were. "We can't tell Harry though." She suddenly realised, remembering her brother's words. Draco had never been kind to any of the Gryffindor's, despite them being her friends.
Draco nodded. "Okay." He accepted. Y/n was very thankful he agreed to her request.
~
3rd year was the most stressful yet, for Y/n. She and Draco were still secretly dating, much to Blaise and Pansy's surprise. They couldn't believe how long it had lasted. But Y/n and Draco were drawn to each other, as friends and lovers.
Summer break was also difficult for Y/n. Aunt Marge's visit had ruined the twins birthday. On top of that, apparently, a psychotic wizard had escaped. The Dursley's didn't understand what that would mean. But Y/n and Harry saw just what dark magic could do to Ginny Weasly last year. It was devastating and powerful.
Y/n ran away with Harry when he blew up Aunt Marge. Aunt Petunia had started being much meaner to her, the older she got. While Y/n didn't know Lily, she thought it might have been the reason Aunt Petunia started shunning her.
So, she stayed at the leaky cauldron with Harry. It was the first time she felt happy to not have parents, there were no rules.
Y/n was hiding something. All the letter her owl, Edwige, was bringing her. All from Draco. She figured Harry was too tied up in his own life to think anything was odd. He probably assumed it was Hermione.
The whole train ride all Harry, Ron and Hermione wanted to talk about was terrifying Sirius Black who was trying to murder the twins.
The train's sudden stop frightened Y/n. As the compartment grew cold, she thought it was Sirius, there to kill them. When the Dementor's bony fingers slide open the door, her heart raced, almost beating out of her chest.
This was it. She was going to die from a faceless ghost. It started to suck the life out of Harry and she froze, not knowing how to help her brother.
Thankfully, the cloaked figure in the corner sprung up, scaring the spirit away.
Y/n rushed to get to Harry, but he had already fainted. He was dazed and confused when he woke, Lupin, as Y/n had come to known, handing him some chocolate.
Once Lupin had re-explained what happened, to Harry, he left.
The Potter twins connection let Y/n feel the fear Harry was in, despite being the braver.
Y/n was more than happy to get off the train, being able to sit next to her boyfriend. The Gryffindor table couldn't see them, so they were free to subtly hold hands.
It didn't feel the same that year. Draco was much darker and meaner. He was mean to Hermione and Hagrid, two of Y/n's companions. She didn't understand it.
Their relationship issues came to a head on the date of Buckbeaks execution. Draco and Y/n didn't agree on the situation but it got worse as she roamed the castle with Harry, Hermione and Ron.
As soon as Y/n saw Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle hiding behind that rock she knew today was going to be her breaking point. She didn't understand why he couldn't just shut his mouth and not say anything.
"Have you ever seen anything quite as pathetic?" said Malfoy. "And he’s supposed to be our teacher!" The look on his face was pure disgust. His eyes flicked up to meet Y/n's, not back down from the remarks he'd made as she stared him down.
It was then she realised it. He cared more about maintaining his arrogant reputation than he did his own girlfriend. The thought broke her heart.
Harry and Ron both marched to him, with Hermione one step ahead. Y/n awkwardly stood there, not knowing how to come between her secret boyfriend and friends.
Hermione got to him first, landing a solid punch to his nose. It was as hard as she could, landing a solid sound.
Draco stumbled back, Crabbe and Goyle rushing to hold him up. He gave Y/n a final look as he ran past her.
Y/n's eyes were already filling with tears. Hermione noticed. "Are you alright?" She asked.
She quickly thought up a lie. "I'm sorry... It's just all of this with Buckbeard is difficult. Can you tell Hagrid I'm really sorry?" She stuttered out, the tears streaming down her cheeks.
They all brought the lie, Harry wrapping her in a hug before they walked off. She stood there and cried for a few minutes, all alone. Like no one in the world cared about her.
It quickly turned to anger, her blood boiling. She stormed off to the Slytherin common room, knowing Draco was too proud to go to the hospital wing.
She found him there, on the couch, Crabbe and Goyle at his side.
"I can't believe Granger," Draco exclaimed, not noticing Y/n. "She's a filthy mudblood I could easily get expelled."
"Tell your father." Goyle prompted. Crabbe and Goyle were the best henchmen, dumb and wanting to cause trouble.
"Goyle, Crabbe, I need to speak to Malfoy," Y/n announced. They didn't understand what she meant. "Alone." They finally understood, scurrying out of the room.
Draco didn't look concerned, his eyes challenging her. "What do you want? Hanging out with your idiot twin, that poor, blood traitor Weaslbee and mudblood Granger." He was just as pissed as Y/n was. Maybe, it was the anger for Granger he was taking out on Y/n.
She couldn't hide it anymore. "We're done." She told him. "I cannot be with you when you hate everyone that loves me."
"Fine." Draco shrugged. "I don't care."
That was the last thing Y/n heard from him as she stormed to her dorm room, a sobbing mess. Pansy quickly wrapped her in a hug, not needing to know what happened.
~
It was the end of term before Y/n even looked in Draco's direction again. She spent all those nights silently sobbing. The slight silver lining was she had gotten much closer to Harry, Hermione and Ron, no longer spending hours with Draco.
He'd trapped her when she was alone in the bleachers, just like he did on their first week.
He didn't place a jacket on her, rather some sunglasses. "Hi." He murmured, hesitantly sitting next to her. Draco was sure Y/n hated him.
"Hey." She replied. The truth was, she missed him. Draco was a part of her, they had grown up in love. They were never meant to fall out of it.
"Enjoying your last day?" Draco asked awkwardly. They felt like they were back in their first year, acting self-consciously.
She nodded, not interested in his small talk. "Yeah, I'm all packed as well." She still refused to look at him.
"I'm sorry." It came tumbling out like he didn't know how to say it. That made her turn her attention to him.
Y/n couldn't help but love him. She never wanted to break up, ever. "Me too." She replied.
Y/n wrapped her arms around him, pulling him in for a hug. He just looked so precious.
"Will you be my girlfriend?" Draco asked, the question was phrased differently this time but it still reminded her of the shy first year.
"Yes." Y/n agreed. She had never known heartbreak like being without Draco.
"Also... I want it to be real this time." That made Y/n worry. She didn't want Harry to find out yet. There was no one Harry hated more. "Will you stay with us these holidays? And come to the Quidditch World Cup?" He asked shyly. That was the bashful boy she adored.
So far, Y/n's plans were to go to the Durley's. She'd just lie to them and say she was staying with Pansy. They wouldn't care because they didn't love her.
'Yes." Y/n told him. "I'm terrified to meet your parents." She admitted.
Draco took her hand in his. "Love, you have nothing to worry about." He assured her. In truth, he also had doubts about his father. Y/n was a Potter.
Once they left the bleachers, Y/n went to see Harry. The trio was in the courtyard.
"Oh Y/n, we were looking for you." Ron pipped up as she took a seat next to them. She tried to not blush too much. "Do you want to come to the Quidditch World Cup with us?" He asked. Uh oh.
"I'm really sorry. I told Pansy I'd go with her family." Y/n lied once again. She felt terrible doing it but she had to. Plus, they weren't going to find out.
"That's fine. Are staying with her the whole summer?" Harry asked. Y/n hated to have to nod. She knew they were keeping a brave face on but they were disappointed.
~
Y/n's lie worked. She made it to out of the station with Draco without anyone seeing.
They got in the car and, from there, they travelled to the manor. It was fabulous. Better than she could ever imagine. Pointed towers and perfectly done gardens, she was in another world.
"Hey, it'll be okay," Draco assured her, taking his hand in hers as they made it to the door. She had already met their house-elf, who carried the bags.
Draco knocked on the door, trying to seem brave. Narcissa swung it open, arms wide open to pull Draco in. Y/n admired how close they were. She had seen Narcissa once before when she came to see Draco. They weren't introduced but Y/n admired how elegant she looked.
"Y/n Potter, right?" Narcissa asked once she had let her boy go.
"Yes, Mrs Malfoy. It's a pleasure to meet you." Y/n politely said.
Narcissa giggled, shaking her head. "Don't be silly, you can call me Narcissa." She said before opening her arms up for the girl. She hugged for just as long as she hugged Draco, making Y/n feel very comfortable.
Lucius walked over, making Y/n's heart race.
"Draco." He greeted his son with a handshake, much less warm than his mother.
Then he turned to Y/n, staring down his nose at her. She had never felt as small. "You must be Y/n Potter?" He held out his hand.
"Yes, sir," Y/n replied, shaking his hand. "It's a pleasure to meet you."
Lucius just scowled. Narcissa interrupted the tension. "Come, kids, we can talk in the living room." Just like that, she was part of the family.
~
The Malfoy tent at the Quidditch world cup was impressive. It was grand and dark like the manor.
Her summer with Draco was the best of her life, not that the others were much to compare to. Narcissa was the kindest woman she'd ever know. When she realised Y/n's birthday was the 31st of July, she insisted on throwing a large party.
She let Y/n pick out all the decorations, taking her on a shopping spree to Diagon Alley. Then, they had a spa day and afternoon tea party with Pansy and Daphne and some of Narcissa's friends. As much as she wanted to, Y/n figured it wasn't right to invite Hermione and Ginny.
That night, they had dinner out with the girls, Draco, Theo and Blaise. It was the best day of her life. It only got better when a massive cake was wheeled out, and a cart for of gifts. She was sure it was more than Dudley had ever gotten.
Draco's was the most special. It was a necklace, a traditional Black family one. On it was their initials.
Y/n made sure to stay in contact with Harry, but things had started to slip. She figured he was just busy but she missed him, and their other friends.
It was difficult for Y/n to get along with Lucius, knowing how close he was to Voldemort, the man who was trying to kill her. Somehow, they just didn't talk about it.
"Are you ready to go?" Draco asked, adjusting his black blazer. She couldn't believe how good he looked, a full black suit. His blonde hair parted in the middle. He had grown into his looks majorly over the summer.
"Yeah." Y/n nodded, putting her last earing in. They were a gift from Narcissa, real emeralds. She had a bad feeling in the pit of her stomach she was trying to shake off as anticipation.
"Okay, Mum has already gone to our box. We're going in with my Father." He told her, walking over to grab her hand. Physical contact was something the couple had gotten used to. It was no longer awkward.
Y/n took his hand, lacing their fingers as they walked out of the tent. Draco was taller than her now, he hadn't been in first year. His slim thumb traced over her knuckles mindlessly.
Lucius didn't seem to mind the two of them being so close. The sky had darkened, and the crowds were already cheering. While Y/n had never been to a muggle sports game, she thought this was better. It was noisy but spectacular.
Draco and Y/n talked as they walked, him occasionally bumping into her shoulder. It always made her giggle.
When she heard Lucius' cruel voice, she looked back at him. He was looking up. Y/n followed his eye line. The Weasley's. Hermione. Harry.
Her brain stopped working, and she froze. The look on Harry's face was pure fury. He was looking between her and Draco rapidly, but it was obvious. They were holding hands, and they had just been giggling together.
Those smiles were long gone. The atmosphere had immediately blackened.
Lucius' threat to Harry made her wince. Harry didn't even look bothered, just furious at her. Betrayed. It physically hurt her, and she gripped Draco's hand.
The Weasley group turned to walk off so did Lucius. Draco pulled Y/n closer to him, wrapping his arm around her shoulder.
"Hey, don't worry. It'll be okay. Harry will calm down." Draco told her. She just hoped it was true. Harry didn't like to be deceived, and she had lied so much. Plus, Draco was never nice to Harry, Hermione and Ron. They probably hated her by association. "My father really shouldn't have said that." He grimaced. That's made her confident in her decision. Draco had changed.
Y/n nodded, trying to choke back the tears welling in her eyes. "Yeah, I know."
Draco stopped in the middle of the bridge. He took her face in his hands. "Hey, I love you." He reminded her before leaning down to kiss her. It was soft and filled her back up with warmth, making the chilling look Harry had sent her go away. She just hoped Harry still loved her.
Y/n tried to put Harry in the back of her mind the rest of the break. She did write him a few letters, but he didn't reply.
~
Harry was too busy to talk to Y/n on the first day of school. She hoped Hermione and Ron weren't giving her the cold shoulder, but they did.
So she spent the welcome feast with Pansy and Daphne. And, of course, her boyfriend.
He confronted her on the second day of school.
Y/n was in the courtyard when Draco and Harry had their quarrel. She always knew Draco was short-tempered, but she couldn't believe the things he was saying to Harry about their mother.
Y/n's shock grew when Harry spat back, knocking Narcissa. He didn't know her like she did. Narcissa had been nothing but kind to Y/n. That was when she knew she couldn't let Harry get away with it.
"Harry!" Y/n yelled, his attention flicked to her. His eyes were even more outraged than they were with Draco.
"What do you want, traitor?" Harry demanded, his voice was angry too.
"You can't say those things about Narcissa," Y/n demanded. Now she knew how mad Draco felt. Her jaw was clenched like her fits. "And, I'm not a traitor. I'm a Slytherin, that wasn't my choice."
Harry rolled his eyes and huffed. "You're sickening. Did you not hear what he said about our mother!?" He lectured her. "I don't know how you could be with someone so vile."
"Draco isn't who you think he is." Y/n defended. Draco loved her. He'd never given up on her like Harry had.
"He hates you!" Harry spat. He was closer to her now, towering over her. She had never seen anyone that mad. "You're not a Potter. You don't belong in our family." He said so lowly it made her shiver.
Harry was so close she thought he was going to hit her. That's when Draco jumped in the middle of the twins, pushing Harry back and shielding Y/n.
"Watch it, Potter." Draco threatened, glaring down at Harry. He was only an inch taller.
Harry scoffed, fists clench, ready for a fight. He looked around Draco, at Y/n. "Mum and Dad would have despised you. You're just like all those other awful Slytherins. I don't understand how you could be with someone as low as Malfoy." His words sat deep in her heart, and he didn't stop them from coming. "You're not a Potter." With that, he left, not looking back.
Y/n immediately burst out in tears. She couldn't stop it. Draco spun around to her, holding her so she wouldn't collapse.
"Hey, hey, hey. It's okay." Draco told her, wrapping her in his arms so tightly. He just held her. "You know they would be proud of you, Y/n. You're so strong and clever." He comforted her, his hands stroking her back.
Y/n shook her head. "No, I'm a Slytherin. They were all brave Gryffindors." She choked out.
"It doesn't matter what house you're in. You're so kind and talented." Draco reassured her. His heart was breaking, seeing his girlfriend in such a bad state. All he wanted to do was stop her from hurting. "I know how important Harry is to you. We can take a break until this all blows over." He reassured her.
Y/n shook her head, clinging to her chest. "No, no, please, Dray." She said as she cried out. "You're the last good thing I have left."
"Baby." He cooed, tracing her cheekbones. "I'll never leave you." He promised.
~
Draco stayed true to his word. He supported her throughout the whole year. Y/n was always worried for Harry. Despite the shunning, he inflicted on her.
It didn't stop with Harry. Y/n lost half of her friends that day. Hermione, the Weasley's and most muggle-borns refused to talk to her. She was always so kind that it troubled her.
Draco took her to the Yule ball, naturally. She saw Harry that night. They even made eye contact, but he didn't comment on her forest green dress. It matched her eyes perfectly, though, and Harry couldn't stop thinking about one photo of his mother he'd seen. They looked so similar.
She spent the Christmas break at the Malfoy's, receiving a sweater from Molly Weasley. That meant the world to her, despite none of them speaking to her.
When they got back to Hogwarts, Y/n figured out how irrelevant she was to Harry. Ron was the one that was taken for the second task. Everyone noticed. Not his own twin, his friend.
Y/n still remained close with Sirius. They wrote letters to each other throughout the year. He knew how worried she was about Harry.
The truth was, Sirius felt bad, James and Lily were his best friends and he knew they'd be disappointed to see the twins split up. Sirius was also worried for Y/n, he knew what it was like being part of the Black family.
He had hatched a few plans to get them to talk, but none worked. Not due to Y/n's lack of trying.
The third task was the worst thing Y/n had been through at Hogwarts. She could feel something bad was happening to Harry. When he came back through the portkey, she saw it. And it was distressing.
Voldermort was reborn, whether everyone believed it or not. Y/n could feel it was true.
~
5th year was exciting.
Y/n celebrated her 15th birthday before it started. This time, they had dinner with her friends. She didn't write to Harry.
Sirius sent her gifts, and he was starting to ask whether Narcissa was okay.
Just after her birthday, in August, Draco Malfoy and Y/n Potter were made prefects. They both read the letters at the breakfast table.
Narcissa was overjoyed for both of them.
At 11am, on the 1st of September, they got on the train to Hogwarts.
The rest of that year went on normally, apart from Umbridge's rules.
Christmas break was a sign that a darker power was brewing. Y/n heard the whispers under the door and she assumed the other side of the war also had meetings.
Y/n was shocked when Death Eaters escaped from Azkaban. After the Umbridge drama died down, they had to sit their O.W.L.s. That was rough.
One terrible day of June was Sirius' last. Y/n cried in Draco's arms for days over the death. She always thought Sirius was the only person who was going to be able to reunite the twins. And now he was gone.
~
Y/n knew something was very wrong during the summer. Draco told her he was a death eater. They cried about it together all night. The weeks following were stressful, and they weren't even back at Hogwarts. The war had started.
Draco and Narcissa kept Y/n hidden from Lucius' guests. O.W.L results were the first good thing that summer.
Y/n's 16th birthday was smaller than her last. Y/n, Draco, Pansy, Blaise and Theo were all hyperaware of the dementor attacks.
That weekend, they visited Diagon Alley with Narcissa. Y/n was at Draco's side the whole time, unfortunately, that meant she had a run-in with Harry and the Weasleys. It was awkward, to say the least. Her own twin still wouldn't acknowledge her.
Draco's task started at the beginning of the year. Y/n was the only one who knew about it, besides Snape.
Then Christmas, with even more death eater meetings. Y/n barely saw Draco. Narcissa had made her promise to take care of him, but it was difficult to get him to eat.
Draco continued his task during the second semester. Y/n knew that Harry knew about Draco. Their twin insight gave him the power to just know things.
It was getting difficult between Y/n and Draco. They didn't talk as honestly as they used to. He wanted to protect her. And she knew he needed to open up.
One day in May, Y/n rushed to see Draco in the hospital wing, concerned about how he could have gotten there. Did something go wrong with the vanishing cabinet?
"Draco!" She cried as she saw him lying on a hospital bed looking pale.
Draco waved at her, a little smile on his face.
"Potter." Snape hissed, looking down at the girl. Y/n didn't care he was there as she wrapped her arms around Draco. Snape was nicer to Y/n this year, which she didn't understand.
From a photo Sirius had given her, she knew she looked more like Lily than ever. She always kept the picture near her. It was the Potter parents holding up their twins, smiling.
"He's fine," Snape told her. "As for your brother, he's going to be in huge trouble." He continued before walking out of the hospital wing.
"What happened?" Y/n demanded, holding Draco's face in her hands. His cheekbones were more prominent now, and his eyes were more overcast.
Draco playfully huffed. "I was, uh, in the bathroom. Potter came in and used the bloody Sectumsempra spell on me." He complained, his eyes now angrier. She couldn't believe Harry would do something like that. But, then again, she didn't really know him.
Y/n noticed the way his voice faded when he talked about where he was. "Why were you in the bathroom?" She knew him well enough to push for an answer."
"Uh, talking." Draco offered an explanation. It wasn't good enough for Y/n to accept.
"To who?" She asked.
Draco groaned, rolling his eyes. He finally gave in. "Fine, I was crying to Moaning Myrtle." He admitted. His cheeks were pink with blush and he looked guilty.
"Dray." Y/n cooed, reaching down to hold his hand. "You can talk to me about anything you need to, any time." She assured him.
Draco nodded, thankfully. "He's going to get detention for the rest of the year." He told her, a self-satisfied smirk on his lips.
Narcissa was one of the last people Y/n expected to see walk into the Hospital Wing. She was in a black pantsuit.
"Mother." Draco greeted her, trying to move in the bed to get up.
"Stay put, you," Narcissa told him with a smile. She walked right over and hugged Y/n. "Are you okay?" She asked. Y/n just nodded. She knew a storm was brewing, but nothing had happened yet. It was only a matter of time. Then she turned to Draco. "Are you?" She asked him.
Draco already had a witty reply, clearly feeling like himself again. "Aside from my own mother preferring my girlfriend to me." He complained, a faux pout on his face.
Narcissa just rolled her eyes, like mother like son. "I can't help it. You get into too much trouble." She told him with a pointed look.
Draco scoffed. "Wasn't my fault." He complained quietly. The girls just gave him a look he knew too well. "Honestly, what are you doing here?" He asked. When Narcissa widened her eyes, he followed the question up with a statement. "Not that I'm not pleased to see you."
"I've actually come for Y/n." She explained.
Both Y/n and Draco looked at her in shock. "What? Why?" Y/n asked, most concerned.
Narcissa looked to Draco who sighed out an 'oh' and then back to Y/n before speaking. "You know about the cabinet." Y/n nodded. "They need it. The Death Eaters. To get into Hogwarts." That made Y/n worry. They weren't coming in to have dinner.
"You don't know this." Draco started, making Y/n's attention turn to him. "My task is to kill Dumbledore." Y/n's mouth gawked open. She could feel her hands shaking. More than anything, she couldn't believe someone would make a kid do that.
Narcissa grimaced. "It's all about to start." Y/n didn't need to ask what 'it' was. "So I'm taking Y/n away." She told them.
"Wait... for how long?" Draco asked quickly, gripping her hand.
"Draco, you sit in those meetings," Narcissa told him. "You know the plan is for them to take over the Ministry of Magic and persecute muggle-borns." That made Y/n wince. "It's not safe for Y/n to stay at Hogwarts, don't be silly about this." She strictly told him.
Draco sighed but nodded. He knew Narcissa was always right. "Can I still see her?" He asked, now thinking rationally. Y/n didn't like that she didn't have any say in the matter.
"Yes." At least there was that. "No one is going to know where she is apart from Lucius, you and I," Narcissa told them.
"Do I get any say in this?" Y/n finally spat out.
Narcissa turned her attention to Y/n with a pleading look. "You know we have to."
"I've still got a month of school left," Y/n argued.
"I know and I'm sorry we have to do this." Narcissa apologised. "It's all going to happen next month."
"Can't I stay until then?" Y/n asked.
Narcissa shook her head. "I promise you, if I thought you could, I would let you. You're a big part of what you-know-who wants, Harry more, but you must stay far away from this." She told her.
Y/n couldn't not agree. "Alright. We're leaving now?" She asked.
"Yes," Narcissa told her. "All of your things have been packed. Draco can come and see you once it's over." She promised.
Draco wrapped his arms around Y/n as he kissed her. It was one of the things she knew she was going to miss. She also knew it was time to go.
"Bye, I love you," Draco told her, waving from his hospital bed.
"I love you too," Y/n replied before walking out of the wing with Narcissa.
From there, they went out a secret passage, making sure no one saw. Professor Snape knew Y/n had to go, so he was coming up with the cover story.
Narcissa and Y/n finally reached a Slytherin scarf, which took them to a house she'd never been to. "Where are we?" Y/n asked, still holding on to the portkey.
"The South of England," Narcissa told her, making her brows furrow and eyes widen. "It's an old Black family house." She explained, opening the door. It was just as grand as the Manor, smaller, though.
Inside it looked just as gorgeous. All the decor was French country vintage. It screamed old money.
"It's beautiful," Y/n told Narcissa, having a look around the inside. There was so much light streaming into the room with wooden details.
"I'll make some tea. Your room is on the second floor, first door." Narcissa told her. Y/n nodded, walking up the stairs to find the room. It was decorated like royalty belonged there. There was a massive window that looked right out onto the coast.
It was then she realised the house was on a cliff. Y/n hadn't seen it from the angle the entryway was at. But it was spectacular. Lonely.
Y/n could spend her whole life there. She set her bags down and strolled around the room. It was smaller than Draco's was, at the manor. But it was much lighter. Almost the complete opposite of the Malfoy family home.
Once she had finished looking around, she went back downstairs to see Narcissa setting tea up on the coffee table. When she walked into the living room she saw the massive windows, showing the ocean.
"Sit," Narcissa commanded and Y/n did so right away. She poured tea for both of them before also sitting down. They sat in silence for a while, Y/n not knowing what to say. "I can tell you have questions." Narcissa prompted.
"Why is Snape protecting Draco and I?" Y/n asked quickly.
Narcissa sighed before answering. "Do you know what an Unbreakable Vow is?" She asked, and Y/n nodded. "Severus and I made one. He vowed to watch over Draco." Y/n nodded again. That vow must have expended to Y/n.
Y/n suddenly had more questions. "You need a Bonder, right?"
"Yes, Bellatrix was ours," Narcissa replied. Y/n was familiar with Draco's strange aunt. They had never met, out of Bellatrix's loyalty to Voldermort.
"Are you going to stay here with me?" She asked, concerned about being alone.
Narcissa shook her head. "I'm sorry. I can only be here sometimes. The story is you ran away, and no one knows where you are, so I can't be here too much." Y/n didn't know that before. Everyone was going to think she'd left by choice. Pansy, Daphne, Blaise, Theo. Harry, if he cared. She knew none of them were going to be able to know why she was gone.
"Am I safe here?" Y/n asked, now worrying about how she would be safe alone. The tea they were sipping seemed to calm her down.
"Yes, there are charms on the house so no one can get in. But, I'm also giving you this." Narcissa stopped what she was saying and pulled out a necklace. It was a heart-shaped gold locket. Narcissa placed it in her hand. Y/n looked at it. That's when she noticed the initials on it. Draco's and hers.
Y/n thanked her. "That's not it. If you open it like this." Narcissa instructed, opening the heart. Y/n noticed the emerald gemstone. "This stone is a portkey, right to the Manor." So Y/n would be able to get back to the Manor.
"I can't thank you enough, and I don't want to intrude, but I do have a personal question." Y/n was hesitant about what she was going to ask. But she needed to know. "You said before, in the hospital wing, that Mr Malfoy knew where I was staying. And I have a lot of respect for him, so I don't want this to come off badly." Y/n could tell she was rambling. Narcissa could as well, she slid a hand onto Y/n's to calm her down. "Why is it safe for him to know? He's you-know-who's number 2. Eventually, he's going to want me dead." It broke Y/n's heart, she knew it was going to ruin Draco's life. But, his father was going to have to kill her.
"Slow down." Narcissa smiled softly. That comforted Y/n a little. "Do you remember when we met, the summer before the World Cup?" She asked. Y/n nodded in agreement, not sure where it was going. "The night we met you, I knew. I knew Draco was in love with you. And, I knew Voldermort was going to come back and try to kill the Potter twins." Y/n's heart started to race at the mention of her parents' death. "I made Lucius make an unbreakable vow. Snape was the Bonder." Oh, it made sense. Lucius couldn't hurt Y/n, Narcissa had protected her.
She just didn't understand why so she asked. "Why? I mean, I appreciate it more than anything. But you risked your whole marriage." It was true, and Narcissa knew that.
"I've never thought you or Harry should be persecuted. My parents raised me as pureblood supremacists, but killing is wrong." Narcissa told her. Y/n was thankful for her honesty. She filled the place Lily had left, and Petunia hadn't tried to fill. "I love Draco, more than anything in the world. The only thing I've ever wanted is to see him happy. I knew he was happy with you." Y/n understood Narcissa's unconditional love for Draco, she felt the same.
"He's lucky to have you," Y/n mentioned, trying not to think about her parents.
"I don't know if I've ever told you this, but I'm very sorry about your parents," Narcissa told her. Y/n could feel the tears in her eyes.
She let a few of them fall. "Did you, uh, know them?"
"My last two years at Hogwarts, they were there. James was only 11 but he was loud and brave. He would even stand up to me with Sirius." Hearing both their names made Y/n cry more. She was crying for the dad she never knew, and the uncle she only had for a short time. "I noticed you at Hogwarts, I think during second year, and I had deja vu. You looked so similar to Lily. She always wore her hair just like you did." Y/n remembered seeing Narcissa but she didn't remember Narcissa seeing her.
"Would they be disappointed in me?" Y/n couldn't help but ask. Narcissa felt her pain, running deep. She immediately wrapped the girl in a hug, letting her cry.
"No, never for a moment." She confirmed. "I know it's not the same, but I'm proud of you." It wasn't the same, but it meant just as much.
"Thank you." Y/n thanked her again.
"No thanks are necessary. I should go back though." Narcissa stated, looking at her watch.
Y/n nodded, gently opening the necklace so she wouldn't touch the emerald. Narcissa held it, and just like that, she was gone.
Y/n found a good amount of things to do. There were movies and music. She still had some of her textbooks. Plus, exploring the house was fun.
But she did miss Draco. And the rest of her friends. Instead of using an owl, she decided to send letters by muggle post to the Malfoy residence, so Narcissa could send them to Hogwarts.
~
There was a knock on the door a couple of weeks after Y/n moved in.
She peaked out the window before seeing a tuff of blonde hair. It was Draco.
Quickly, she swung the door open, embarrassing him in her arms.
Draco hugged her back, lifting her off the ground and twirling her around.
"Dray, I missed you." She cooed, head buried in his shoulder.
"I missed you too, my girl." He replied, pulling her even closer. It was so tight she felt like she couldn't breathe.
When she pulled back, she had a thought. "How did you manage to come? Don't you have classes?"
Draco shook his head. "Quidditch match. It's Gryffindor vs Ravenclaw, so I came here instead." Y/n was very grateful for Quidditch that day.
They only had a few hours before people would notice he was gone. But they baked cookies together while Draco filled her in on everything she'd missed. As well as lots of kissing.
When it came time for him to leave, she was upset. But Draco made her promise not to cry.
~
Draco came back after the battle of the tower. Y/n knew there was something wrong. He didn't grin as wide when he met her at the beach.
There were already tears forming in his eyes, and it was late.
"Dray, talk to me, baby." Y/n pleaded as they lay together on the couch. It was far past midnight. Y/n was on Draco's chest and they were a tangle of limbs. She had her fingers running through his hair.
Draco sighed. "I couldn't do it." He sobbed out. "I couldn't kill him. Snape had to do it. It was so horrible, Y/n." He continued, tears still falling. "My father was so mad. He cares more about appeasing Voldermort than me." Y/n's heart clenched as she heard his words.
"Draco, he loves you." Y/n tried to reassure him.
Draco tried to accept it, but it was difficult. "I'm scared for what's going to happen." He told her.
"Me too," Y/n admitted. "How's it all going to end?" She asked him.
The truth was Draco didn't know. And she knew that. "They're talking over the Manor." He didn't want to be the one telling her the bad news. "They're going to go after anyone and everyone associated with Muggleborns. I'm not going to get to be here much." He hesitantly admitted.
"You've done what they needed you to do, though!" Y/n exclaimed, feeling outraged.
"I know. I'm not sure what they're going to do with me. Father lectured me and I just came here." Draco explained. It reassured her there might be some hope he could spend the summer there. "It'll be okay, Y/n."
She tried to retain that. "Can you come back on my birthday, at least?" Y/n asked.
"Of course, baby." Draco quickly replied. That brought Y/n some relief.
~
Draco was busy a lot of the summer. Despite having completed the task he was given, he was still Lucius's son.
He told Y/n all about how the Manor had been taken over by death eaters. It worried her. She also spent a lot of time worried about Harry. He was the only blood connection she had left in the world, and she had no idea where he was.
Draco came back on her birthday like he promised. He had more flowers than she'd ever seen in her life. That wasn't where the gifts ended. Jewellery, new shoes, perfume and a big cake.
Narcissa made it as well for dinner. She even insisted Draco stay the night.
By nighttime, they were lying in bed together. Draco's arms wrapped around her tightly. As usual, she lay against his chest. Draco stroking her hair.
When she looked up at him, she knew something was wrong. After all their years together, she could read him like a book. "What is it?"
"What do you mean?" He asked. His voice was a slightly higher pitch. Y/n recognised that as a sign he was hiding something.
"I can tell something bothering you," Y/n explained. "Let me in, Dray." She pleaded.
Draco knew he had to. "I have to leave early tomorrow morning."
Y/n knew that wasn't it. "I need the whole truth." Draco groaned, knowing she knew him better than he knew himself.
"I have to go early so I can be at the takeover of the ministry," Draco revealed to her. "They're going after Scrimgeour because he knows where Harry is." Oh. That wasn't good. Either the minister would give up Harry's location, and her twin brother would be killed. Or, the Ministry of Magic would be run by Death Eaters. Either way, their power was growing. Y/n knew Harry only had a matter of time. Then she would be next.
"So, no one knows where Harry is?" Y/n asked hopefully. Even if he hated her, she would rather he was alive.
Draco shook his head. "He's hunting the Horcruxes, I'd guess. Scrimgeour knows and maybe a few members of the Ministry." That made Y/n relieved, although she wasn't sure how good Harry's survival skills were.
"Am I going to be okay?" Y/n asked, fearing the worst.
Draco took a deep breath as he prepared an answer. "I'm never going to let him get to you, I promise. My Father's vow will make sure he can't either. No one else knows you're here." He reassured her. Y/n just hoped it was true, Draco could read that.
"So you're going back to Hogwarts?" Y/n couldn't help but ask.
Draco nodded. "I think Snape is going to be appointed Headmaster. I'll be safe there." That reassured Y/n to no end. He chuckled slightly, a smile on his face. "We were going to be Head boy and girl." He explained. Y/n's face dropped as she tried not to cry. "Hey, hey, hey." Draco noticed. "It's just the way it happened."
"I know." She nodded. "It just could have been the best year ever."
"When this is all over, we're going to have the best year." He assured her. Y/n tried to hang onto that.
It got difficult the further the year dragged on. Y/n barely saw Draco. She did receive letters about how horrible things had gotten. Hogwarts was gloomier, no one could find Harry, Snape's regime was intense. Y/n was thankful she was away from the whole mess.
Just before Christmas, she found out Luna Lovegood had been kidnapped. Draco had started to detest the cause he was fighting for. He never said so, but she could infer it from what he wrote.
In March, she discovered Harry had been captured. Draco was the one who had to identify him, and he felt horrible about it. He cried on her shoulder, begging her to forgive him when he came to see her. Y/n was never mad at Draco. She was smart enough to know he had to do it. And, deep down, she could feel that Harry was okay.
Draco was in a worse state when they escaped. Not because he wanted Harry to be killed. Because his own aunt had murdered Dobby. While he was taught to hate the house-elves, Dobby was almost his younger sibling.
All Draco could feel was split, unsure of what to do.
Draco told her it was all going to happen on May 1st. The battle of Hogwarts. Y/n spent the whole day riddled with anxiety. She spent a whole 3 days wide awake, waiting for news.
She felt a cursing pain through her head at some point on the 2nd of May. Then the visions started, of Harry and Dumbledore at a train station. She realised she was seeing inside Harry's vision. When he made the choice to return to his body, Y/n knew everything would be alright.
Y/n anxious sat on the couch until 3 people appeared. It was only the early hours of the morning. She immediately ran to Draco wrapping her arms around him. He was unkempt, and his hair was a mess. He hugged her back, pulling her into his chest. She had never seen him looking as disturbed.
"What happened?" Y/n asked, turning to give Narcissa a hug. Much to her surprise, Lucius shook her hand. It was the first time they'd ever done something like that.
"We left," Lucius told her. That was also the first time he'd ever properly talked to her. She didn't understand.
They explained it all to her. How Harry sacrificed himself, how he died, more importantly how Narcissa discovered he was alive. Y/n hung on every word as Narcissa told her how she had lied to Voldermort. She also told Y/n Harry asked if she was still alive. Harry still cared about her.
By that point Draco, Narcissa and Y/n were all crying.
The sun had just started rising when Y/n realised it.
Suddenly, she had a massive headache. The kind she knew Harry used to have. And she knew what it meant.
"Voldermort's dead," Y/n announced, causing all of their eyes to widen. "I just know. I can feel it. Harry killed him." She felt more connected to Harry than she had in years, but she knew.
There were no words any of them said as they hugged. She could feel her head beating rapidly, the same as Draco's.
"Who died?" Y/n finally asked the question she was terrified to ask. Harry was the only one she knew was alive from the good side.
"Bellatrix." Narcissa sobbed out, Lucius immediately pulling her into a hug. It was one of the first times Y/n had seen them acting so intimately.
Draco continued giving Y/n the list. Every second felt like an hour as she hoped none of her friends died. "Fred Weasley." She could only think about the heartbreak that would have caused her brother and his friends. "Snape too." Draco let a few tears fall and Y/n rushed to wipe them. "Lupin and Tonks." Lupin was the last person alive who really knew her parents. Now her chances of knowing about them were over. "There were a lot of others too but everyone else we are close to is okay."
"Good." Y/n nodded before wrapping him in a hug. They stayed like that for a few minutes. Both couples holding each other, all feeling extremely grateful.
"We should go back home," Narcissa told them, glancing at the clock on the wall. "We'll have breakfast." She promised.
Draco enthusiastically nodded. "I'm starving." He mentioned.
Narcissa reached out to grab his hand. "You haven't eaten in days."
Y/n quickly turned her attention to Draco. "Dray." She told him, hitting his arm. "You can't do that."
"I won't, ever again." He promised, his hand wrapping around her waist. "As long as you're there to cook for me." He cheekily quipped, looking at Y/n with a grin. It was the first one she had seen in a while.
Narcissa and Lucius both laughed at the younger couple who reminded them of themselves. "You're dreaming," Y/n replied, bumping into his shoulder. Y/n opened her necklace.
Narcissa, Draco, Lucius and Y/n all touched the emerald. Just like that, they arrived in the Manor living room. It was like Y/n remembered, still as dark. She did feel better about being there, knowing no death eaters were trying to kill her brother.
Over pancakes, they laughed and talked. The world finally felt peaceful again. It was the first time Y/n had been happy in weeks.
An owl knocked at the window, around midday and Y/n took the two letters out of its mouth.
"Dray." She told him, handing his one over to him. "It's from Hogwarts." She told Narcissa and Lucius. They both opened their letters and read them. "In June, they're having an end of year feast," Y/n explained.
"So, we've got a month off school?" Draco looked thrilled by the news.
Narcissa chuckled. "What does it say about your exams?" She asked.
Draco read further down. "Mine says my grades from last year will be considered my grades for this year and I can become an Aurora. Or I can go back to Hogwarts." There was hopefulness in his voice Y/n had missed.
"Draco!" Narcissa cheered, jumping up to hug him. "Congratulations."
"Mine says the same." Y/n realised. "But how is that possible?" She asked, looking at Narcissa.
"I'm not sure." The woman replied, looking just as confused.
"I may have a few words with the acting Ministry when Voldermort was in charge," Lucius reported. All 3 of them were shocked by the confession.
Y/n was overcome with appreciation. "Thank you, sir."
"Please, Lucius is fine." That surprised Y/n but it was nice to hear he might not have hated her as much as she thought. It was the first time Y/n had seen a smile on his face. "What are you two planning on doing with your time off?" He asked the younger couple.
Draco and Y/n met each other's eyes, they hadn't thought about it. "What are we meant to do?" Draco asked.
"The house on the cliff is empty, if you want to spend more time there, Y/n," Narcissa mentioned. Draco grinned widely, nodding his head. He accepted the offer. "Slow down, Y/n?" Narcissa asked, turning her attention to Y/n.
"Yes, I'd love to. Thank you." Y/n affirmed her boyfriend's acceptance.
"When can we go?" Draco asked.
Lucius chuckled. "You don't want to spend time with your parents, son?" He joked. Another first. "You're going of age now, Draco. Y/n too. I think you've both earned the privilege of being treated like adults." He told them.
"You have to be back for your birthday, Draco. We're going to throw a party." Narcissa instructed, raising her eyebrows at him.
"So I'm not an adult?" Draco quipped back.
Narcissa turned to Y/n. "Will you make sure he comes back?" Y/n nodded. "Then you are both free to leave after I get a hug." She informed them, opening her arms up. Draco hugged her first, standing much taller than her.
Then he left to get his stuff. Lucius followed him up the stairs. Y/n walked over to Narcissa, embracing her.
"Thank you, for everything." Y/n mentioned in her arms.
"It's never a problem, sweetness," Narcissa replied, kissing the girl on the forehead.
~
Y/n and Draco took a different portkey to the house. Both of them were buzzing to have a month together after being apart for so long. They finally felt free and independent.
For a few weeks, they just hung out, reacquainting with each other. They spent time in London, seeing muggle sights and shopping. As well as the small, nearby muggle town. It had the cutest cafe.
Draco and Y/n also hung out with Pansy, Theo and Blaise again. They were all thrilled to see her. She explained the whole situation to them and they completely understood.
Between them, it was like no time was lost.
One summer evening, Draco had insisted on cooking Y/n dinner. He explained it was a date. She was to dress up nice like they were going out. Draco was in a full black suit, matching Y/n's sparkling black dress.
He even set the outdoor table, making Y/n sit there and wait for him to bring out dinner.
It was a pasta dish. The same one Narcissa had made the first time Y/n met the Malfoy family.
"Thank you, Dray," Y/n said as they sat, looking out at the view. The sun was just setting and the whole sky was painted pinks and oranges. In the distance, there was the sound of waves breaking on the cliff.
Draco looked nervous, she hadn't seen him like that for a long time. "Uh, I had a question for you." He stuttered out, cheeks turning pink.
Y/n sent him a soft smile, trying to help him calm down. His nerves were worrying her. What could he possibly ask her? Y/n knew exactly what was about to happen when Draco slid off his chair and down onto one knee. Her hands immediately came over her mouth. Tears were already pricking her eyes. He reached into his back pocket, producing a green velvet box.
"I've, uh, I've thought about doing this for a really long time. When we first met I knew you were the one who was always going to hold a special part of my heart. It was everything about you. I never believed in love at first sight until I met you." Y/n was full-on sobbing at Draco's words. They were the sweetest thing anyone had ever said. "I knew from when I met you that I'd always love you. But I had no idea you'd bear to be around me for long enough. I was kind of insufferable." Y/n and Draco both chuckled. "I'm so grateful I even got the chance to know someone as clever, kind, funny and ambitious as you. Once I'd asked you out, I knew I needed you to be mine forever." Draco let a few tears out, stopping to wipe them. "I've done a lot of stupid things, hurt a lot of people and you're far too good for me, I know that. But, I swear, I'm going to spend every day making it up however I can. I'm going to spend every day making it up to you too. If you let me. I think I knew you before I understood myself. You truly are my best friend and the most important person to me in the world." Neither of them could stop the uncontrollable tears they let out. "So, uh, I've got to ask now. Y/n Potter, will you do me the honours of marrying me?" Draco opened the ring box, revealing a huge diamond ring. It looked vintage and the prettiest thing Y/n had ever seen.
Y/n wiped a few stray tears off her cheeks, leaning down to do that same to Draco. "Yes, Draco. A million times yes." He was grinning as wide as she'd ever seen as he slipped the ring on her finger.
He stood up, holding her face in his hands. "I love you." He told her, leaning down to kiss her gently.
"I love you too," Y/n replied, eyes closed with her forehead intimately pressed against Draco's. When she moved her eyes she looked down at the ring. "It's so beautiful, Dray."
Draco nodded before explaining the story. "It's, um, a Black family heirloom. If Mum, Aunt Bella or Aunt Andromeda were boys, they would have gotten it. Luckily for me, it skipped a generation."
"It's stunning." Y/n leant back up to place a kiss on his lips. "Now, what have you cooked for dessert?" She asked, giggling lightly.
Draco rolled his eyes. "Your favourite, of course, but only because you said yes." He revelled.
~
Y/n woke Draco up on his birthday with an assortment of gifts. After they ate breakfast and unwrapped presents, they went to the Manor.
Y/n knocked on the door happily. Draco's left hand entwined with her right one. Narcissa swung it open and embarrassed Y/n in an enthusiastic hug. She quickly grabbed Y/n's left hand, looking at the ring.
"I knew it would look perfect on you," Narcissa mentioned, tracing over the ring. Y/n grinned at her.
"It is perfect," Y/n said, grinning at Draco.
"You're perfect." Draco simply replied. Narcissa chuckled at the two of them. "Can I have my hug?" He asked Narcissa.
Narcissa dropped Y/n's hand hesitantly to pull him in. "18 but you're still acting like a petulant child." She joked making Draco pull a face of mock offence. "Happy birthday, Draco."
"Are you keeping them in here, Sissy?" Lucius asked, walking around the corner. Narcissa rolled her eyes at him. "Happy birthday, son." He said, wrapping Draco in a hug. "Y/n." Lucius turned to her.
"Mr Malfoy." Y/n greeted. She thought she was in trouble when he raised his eyebrows and shot her a pointed look. The smile on his lips assured her she wasn't about to be told off. "Lucius." She corrected herself.
Y/n held out a hand to shake his but he shook his head, opening his arms. "You're my future daughter-in-law, come here." He insisted, and Y/n hugged him, trying to avoid showing her shock.
After they had lunch and Draco opened more presents, Pansy, Daphne, Theo, Blaise, other friends and several Malfoy and Black family members came over. It was a phenomenal party.
Pansy raced right over to Y/n, flinging her arms around the girl.
"Hi Pansy, it's actually my birthday." Draco sarcastically greeted her.
Pansy rolled her eyes. "Happy birthday, you big baby." She said, giving him a hug too. "I'm sorry I missed my best friend." Draco faked offence.
Theo, Blaise and Daphne all came to hug the couple as well. Neither Y/n nor Draco had realised they didn't know about the engagement.
They all quickly got flutes of champagne, raising them to toast each Draco.
That's when Pansy saw it. "Oh, Merlin. Is that an engagement ring!?" Pansy shouted, grabbing Y/n's left hand.
Both Y/n and Draco awkwardly laughed. "Yes," Y/n confirmed as Pansy admired the ring, showing Y/n's hand to Daphne and the boys.
"That's not just any ring. That's a Black Family ring." Blaise noticed.
Y/n furrowed her eyebrows. "How did you know that?" She asked, looking back at Draco.
He was blushing pink. "Loverboy, here, has been talking about giving it to you since 1st year," Theo informed Y/n. "He wouldn't shut up about it most nights." Her eyes widened as she looked at a red-faced Draco.
"You never told me that," Y/n mentioned, nudging his chest. Draco groaned, wrapping his arm around Y/n's waist.
"Because it's really embarrassing." Draco quietly stated.
Daphne pattered Draco's arm. "Y/n used to talk about you in her sleep." Daphne declared. That made Y/n's cheeks heat. Draco and the rest of the friend group burst out laughing.
~
It was finally the day of the final Hogwarts feast. Y/n didn't ever think, at 11 years old, it was going to end like this. In 7 years, she had learnt so much more than most people learnt in their lifetime.
"Pans, Blaise." Y/n opened the door of the Black's seaside house to invite Pansy and Blaise in.
Pansy and Blaise were both dressed in formal clothing as they hugged Y/n. She was wearing a deep green dress that matched Draco's suit's tie.
"You look lovely." Pansy complimented her.
"Pansy, look at you!" Y/n returned the compliment, instructing Pansy to do a spin of her silver dress.
"Are we ready to go?" Draco asked, walking down the stairs. He was in a full black suit aside from his green tie. He bro-hugged Blaise and gave Pansy a hug before wrapping an arm around Y/n's waist.
Y/n nodded. "Let's do it."
Y/n hadn't seen how destructed Hogwarts was, but it now looked just like when she left. She couldn't help but feel sad at the tragedy that had occurred a month ago.
"It's odd being back," Pansy spoke what they were all thinking. Everyone gave her a nod of agreement.
The two couples walked into the great hall, hand in hand. Everyone was surprised to see Y/n. They still had no explanation for why she was gone.
Naturally, Y/n's eyes met her brother. She noticed how faded his lightning-bold scar looked. But she didn't go over to him, she just went to her house table.
McGonagall spoke, about the losses they had faced and how good always won in the end. Her speech was inspiring. Everyone was still distraught about the battle, it was evident on their faces.
They ate, laughing at their tables as the sky fell dark. Y/n had missed being at Hogwarts, it was like home to her. The couple finally made their way through the castle to go home when it was late.
"Y/n!" That was a voice she hadn't expected to hear. She hadn't heard him say her name in years. Harry. His voice was much deeper now.
Y/n stopped in her tracks, quickly turned around to look at him. She still looked like she remembered. "Hi." She greeted him, awkwardly rocking on her feet.
"I'll give you a moment," Draco mentioned, unlacing his hand with Y/n's and walking off.
Now, neither of them knew what to say. They were family but so disconnected.
"How are you?" Harry finally asked.
Y/n softly smiled. "I'm alright. And you?"
"Good." Harry stuttered. Silence fell again. "I'm so sorry." He blurted out. "I never should have said the things I did in 4th year. I was so angry about what Malfoy was saying and I couldn't believe it."
Y/n nodded. "I know, Harry, you don't need to explain it or be sorry."
"No, I do. I shouldn't have refused to talk to you for 3 years. It was childish and hurt you." Harry insisted. It made Y/n feel like the weight was off her shoulders. A weight she had been hauling for years. "I looked for you when I left Hogwarts for a whole year."
That was new information but it warmed Y/n's heart. "Harry, I had no idea." She replied, tears swelling in her eyes. "Narcissa told me you asked about me."
"I felt the worst I had ever felt. I was immature, and mum and dad would have been disappointed." Harry admitted.
Y/n shook her head, finally letting the tears fall at the thought of her parents. "Harry, no, please. They would be so proud of you for everything. I'm so sorry about everything I said as well. I just need to know if you hate me." She begged, looking into his matching eyes.
"I never hated you, not for a minute. I was mad but I was also stupid and prejudice." Harry told her, finally allowing her to relax. Y/n pulled him in for a hug without thinking about it. "I missed you so much." Harry was sobbing too, hot tears on Y/n's back.
"I missed you too. Ron and Hermione and the Weasley's too." Y/n told him, pulling back. "Would you maybe want to hang out sometime. Talk?"
Harry couldn't nod quick enough. "Yes, please. I'd really like that. We've missed a lot of time."
Y/n pulled him back in for another hug. It was like the two puzzle pieces were finally together. The part of her heart that was missing was now filled.
"Is your scar okay?" Y/n asked, running her left forefinger over Harry's forehead.
Harry nodded, glancing up at her finger. He noticed the ring. Harry grabbed Y/n's hand, examining it in front of her. "Oh my." He exclaimed.
"Please don't be mad." Y/n winced, breath shortening.
"No, not at all," Harry told her. "I just want to be a part of your life. Draco's as well." He told her honestly. Y/n had never felt better than she did right then.
"Thank you," Y/n told him. "Are you with Ginny?" She couldn't help but ask.
Harry smiled as he nodded. "Yeah. This ring is phenomenal though." Harry mentioned, smiling as he met Y/n's eyes.
"I know." Y/n agreed a giddy smile on her face.
Today just might have been the best day of her life. She had a twin brother she spoke to and an amazing fiancee. Life was perfect.
#draco malfoy series#draco angst#draco x oc#draco fic#draco smut#draco fanart#draco fanfiction#draco lucius malfoy#draco malfoy fanfiction#dracomalfoy#draco malfoy x gryffindor#draco one shot#draco imagine#draco x reader#draco fluff#draco x slytherin!reader#draco x y/n#draco fuckingmalfoy#draco malfoy#harry james potter#drarry#draco malfoy x slytherin#draco malfoy x y/n#draco malfoy fluff#draco malfoy au#draco malfoy x reader#draco malfoy imagine#draco malfoy angst#draco malfoy smut#draco malfoy x you
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Hello Hello!
this isn't apart of of plot. Just something I wanted to write for my poly!c!karlnapity x reader series.
First kiss
There are two things to write about here.
1. Your first kiss with each individual boy. (For Sap and Quackity I am going to do before and after you started the poly relationship. Y/n didn't kiss Karl until the poly relationship.)
2. That one time you all actually took turns kissing.
So I'm gonna write both. (Dont worry. Its not spicy. Fluffy really)
1st one: first kiss each individual boy.
The first one you kissed was Sapnap.
You were 17 years old. You and him were out by your hangout spot by a lake. It was a late Saturday night and it wasn't to cold. (Yes you remember every detail because you think of that night non stop)
You started to talk about crushes, dates and kisses. He was the one who brought up the fact that he had never kissed anyone.
"Really? You've never kissed anyone? I thought you were a lady's man?" You teased. He shoved you lightly.
"What about you huh? You've ever kissed anyone?" He resorted back.
"No. But at least I don't lie about it!"
"I DIDN'T LIE! I just was making jokes!"
"Of course sappy. Whatever you say."
It was quiet for a bit. Kinda awkward but not at the same time.
"So um..." Sapnap started, "since we've never kissed anyone, maybe... you'd wanna just... get it out of the way? Just to know what it's like?" He asked. When you didn't respond right away he got nervous.
"I mean! Only if you want! I mean we do trust each other enough to like... do that and not like wanna fuck or whatever."
"What are you even saying right now?" You asked.
"I have no clue... but do you..." you sighed at this dorky boy.
"I'm alright with it." You answered.
"Okay... so do I..." you laughed his stayment and noticed how he licked his lips a bit and looked at yours.
You gently put your hand on his neck and leaned in. You lips conected. There was nothing else to it. Your lips just touched and after about 15 seconds you pulled away.
By the look of his face when you pulled away, you would have thought you'd done more then kissing.
"God sap your such a dork."
Next you kissed Quackity when you had started dating.
It had happened on a night where you didn't plan on sleeping and you and him were just watching movies.
"Not gonna lie, this movie kinda sucks." He said.
"Then why'd you pick it?"
"I was hoping it be good. But really it's shit." He grabbed the remote and started to look for something else to watch.
You noticed you were low on snacks in the snack bowl and the bottle of soda was almost empty.
"I'm gonna go get more food and drinks." You said. But then Quackity threw himself on top of you.
"No don't get up! I won't be able to get comfortable again if you do!" He protest.
"But we're gonna run out of food."
"I can starve." You laughed at him and tried to get up but failed.
"Come on, quack, I gotta get up." He grumbled.
"Nooooo."
"Please?" You asked giving him puppy dog eyes, which he pouted at.
"I'll only let you up on one condition!" He said.
"And what could that be?" You asked.
"Give me a kiss." That shocked you. You didn't expect those word to come out of his mouth. He noticed your shocked state and smiled to himself. He thought he had won until you pulled him up towards you and connected your lips together.
It was filled with passion but nothing too extreme. Once you pulled away, you stood and grabbed the snack bowl. It took him a minute to realize what the hell happened.
"Wait no I changed my mind! Get back here and give me more kisses!" He shouted and followed you of the room.
Now you hadn't kissed Karl until the poly relationship started. You had only dreamed of kissing him up to the point it happened.
But when it did, you couldn't wish for anything better.
"Y/n, baby! Come here!" He shouted.
"No need to shout baby, it's just us today." You said. Today Sapnap and Quackity had gone out to do something on the SMP, leaving you can Karl alone for the day.
"I know. But I want to do something!" He said excitedly. It surprised you how often this man could get excited.
"What do you want to do baby?" You asked.
"I wanna make cookies!" He said and tapped the counter excitedly.
You smiled and nodded.
"Let's get the stuff for it."
Soon enough you were mixing stuff in the bowl with a whisk while Karl was getting the tray ready to put the cookies dough on.
While you were putting together the cookies and whatnot, Karl barley moved more then 5 feet from you. It was something you were not expecting when you started the relationship but were definitely prepared for. Considering you were very touch starved (lol same😭). He was always touching you or near you. He always held your hand or wrapped his arms around you whenever he had the change.
Now that the tray was ready you were just waiting for the batter to be done.
*skip to when the cookies were being put in the oven*
Karl safely put the cookies in the oven and set the timer. You were sitting at the table and Karl sat next to you. He put his head on your shoulder and you played with his hair until the timer when off. Once the cookies were out Karl wanted to decorate them.
"We have to wait sweetie, otherwise the frosting will melt on the cookies and it won't look good. He pouted but he perked back up when you help a spoon full of frosting up to his lips. He took some of it and you put the soon in your mouth and ate the rest.
He let out a gasps and you looked at him strangely.
"What?" You asked.
"Nothing it's just..."
"What?" You asked. You didn't know if you should be concerned or not.
"We had an indirect kiss." You wanted to face palm but didn't (dude I swear, even tho me and my gf kiss all the time anytime we indirect kiss they are like that.)
You laugh and shake your head. You turn back to the cookies and mutter something.
"What was that?" Karl asked.
"Nothing."
"What?" He asks with a giggle.
"I said "I could give you a real one." You felt your face grow hotter.
"Oh yeah? What's stopping ya?" Karl laughs and you turn to face him.
You shrug and he leans down. His lips are just as soft as you imagined. You can taste the leftover frosting on his lips and he breaks the kiss with a giggle which you respond to with one of your own.
Your first kiss with Sapnap after the poly relationship started was a bit awkward considering the last time you kissed you were 17.
That day was the anniversary of your first kiss (yes he marked it in his calendar) and he wanted to do something special.
"What could be so special that you had to blindfold me and drag me out somewheres?" You asked holding your hands out in front of you.
"You'll remember when we get there!" He repeated for like the 20th time since you left the house.
"I do not trust you leading me around with me being blindfolded." You said again for the 25th time since you left.
"To be honest, I wouldn't either."
"Sapnap!"
"It's okay! We are almost there... just one more step... okay... sit." You say down and felt grass? He took off the blindfold and you instantly realized where you were.
"Omg sap! This is where we had our first kiss!" You said excitedly. He nodded with a smile.
"Yep, right here in this spot. It's been (insert number of years) since we kissed today!"
"Wow. I can't believe you remembered."
"What can I say. I was like, head over heels for you." You laughed at him. There was silence. But it was a peaceful silence. Until he spoke up.
"So I was wondering. Since we've only kissed once, something something years ago... do you maybe wanna... get it over with? I mean! Only if you want to!" You chucked at his reenactment of what he said during your first kiss.
"I won't mind." He smiled before pulling you in for a kiss. This time you didn't pull away after 15 seconds.
Once you did pull away, he still had that face that made you think you did more then kiss (which you didn't)
You laughed at his face.
"I love you darlin'" he said.
"I love you too Sappy."
Your first kiss with Quackity after the poly relationship started was a lot more chiller then the others. It was a really simple one. Because you had been dating for awhile before the poly relationship started and had kissed frequently.
Quackity had just come downstairs into the kitchen where you were drinking some coffee (or whatever you drink). You sitting on the counter so he stood in between your legs and laid his underbody agaisnt yours.
He was never a morning person and his hair was all over the place. You started to run your hands through it.
"Good morning, Quack." You said.
"Good mornin'" you smiled at his sleepiness. He leaned up and gave you a simple kiss but sapnap walked in during it.
"Where's my mornin' kiss!" He shouted.
"Get over here and I'll give you one!" You said back.
Now you so you know in the lore when karlnapity started and like Quackity kissed karl and sapnap and then sapnap kissed Karl. Well living with Karlnapity, that happens a lot in the house.
Someone will walk in on two people kissing and ask for one and soon everyone's just giving kisses out and whatnot so here is my little writing about it.
Quite often someone walks in on you giving one of the other boys and then asks for a kiss as well (mostly sap) and sometimes it will be a playful fight over who gets to kiss you first or longer (mostly Sap and Quackity) then the other boy will just walk in a kiss you (mostly karl) and the others will be like 😱😡🤨😑. Its honestly funny. He's a little example:
One time you were cooking dinner and the food was in the oven so you were just waiting for it to finish.
Then Quackity walked in.
"Smells great, babe. I can't wait to eat." He gives you a little hug and a kiss. Of course Sapnap sees and then he wants a kiss.
"Give me one!" He complains.
"No, get outta here! I was kissing them first!" Quackity shouts. Soon Quackity and Sapnap and pushing each other and playing fighting. You smile in amusement. Karl walks in and moves to your side. He kisses your cheek.
"Smells great baby. Sorry these boys are interrupting your very amazing cooking."
"Its alright. I'm just waiting for the food to be done cooking in the oven." He shrugs and gives you a kiss on the lips. When Sapnap and Quackity notice they gasps which makes Karl giggle and pull away.
"How dare you just walk into this kitchen and just stell my love from me!?" Quackity jokingly yells at Karl which makes him laugh more.
"Aww, you just want your own loving!" Karl starts to plant kisses all over Quackitys face which makes his scream and laugh. Sapnap walks over to you and finaly get to kiss you.
"I love you Darlin'." He smiles in the kiss.
"I love you too."
#imagines#fiction#fluff#dream smp#dream smp x reader#dreamsmp fanfic#karl jacobs x reader#karl jacobs#karlnapity#karlnapity x reader#quackity x reader#quackity#sapnap fanfic#sapnap x reader#sapnap
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cherry blossom avenue.
❀ genre: angst/fluff; arranged marriage!au; f2l!au;
❀ pairing: jin x reader;
❀ length: 23.0k;
❀ synopsis: college would’ve been unbearable if it weren’t for your wallowing sessions with your best friend jin over a shared “forever alone” woe, so it really was only a matter of time until the two of you sealed a shoddy promise to betroth the other at the age of 27. perhaps it was only a silly joke to you then, but you should’ve known better nonetheless; because when a wedding invitation arrives five years later down the road with his name signed next to another’s, feelings that were once buried begin to blossom once again.
“Don’t be a homewrecker.”
What was supposed to be a light-hearted tease over your fleeting glimpses in his direction bears much more weight than even reality should have; and unbeknownst to her, even if your friend’s commentary strikes a fear in you, a fear that has some creature eating away at you and a horrifying drop in the twisted pain of your chest, the daunting knowledge of a potential truth behind her words pale in comparison to the anguish brought upon by a familiar face of the past.
Because even as you stand far and hidden behind the crowd of overly dressed classmates and unacquainted businessmen all painted by a silhouette of dimmed black, you manage to observe him through the few albeit sure opportunities; for when the passersby chatter, cross, and weave through the lavish ballroom floor at the perfect time, place, and space for you to peep through the pinholes seemingly formed by pure happenstance or a cruel wish casted upon by fate, the clock returns to a buried state of mind.
It’s a state of mind seven years stale, mistakenly manifested and deliberately buried. It’s a transition in mindsets when fondness sours into a longing for something that could never be, for his reciprocation of affections means much less than its origins. It’s a heavy moment when you’re finally sure he would never come to speak the language of your enamored being. It’s that fractured frame in time when everyone freezes in their tracks but a reverberating pain transcends the laws of the universe, almost as if on a personal quest to oust you; and even if you vehemently down yourself with another magical shot of liquor, nothing can quite ease the internal war stirring within.
One hand grasping a glass of red wine worth much more than a month of your salary and one arm crossed under the bosom draped over by your only presentable black satin slip dress, you’re almost numb to the turmoil that is irony. How cruel is it that even after seven years of having believed you had moved on, nothing has really changed after all? Your heart still melts in the wake of his dorky grin, your chest still winces over the buried buds of a coveted love, and your blood still runs intoxicated by the presumption that this phase of infatuation would pass with time.
Your friendship, your feelings, your shared promise, a youth that no one had paid witness to except for you, him, and that cherry blossom tree down that street, nothing has really changed. In fact, you feel as though you could still march across this room and nonchalantly probe at your best friend’s cheek with the ultimate goal of eliciting a shriek from your best friend.
And yet, the circumstances that have brought you back to him in this very room must have been the one cruel exception.
“A ‘homewrecker?’” you feign a light-hearted chuckle, swirling your drink and taking another sip as you peek at the distorted glass-image of the man and the woman beside him. “And why would you say something as horrifying as that?”
“Didn’t you say you and, what’s his name,” Alex pauses before nearly gasping, “ah, Seokjin! Didn’t you say you two used to be best friends in college? You might have been his best friend but she’s his fiance now, Y/N! Plus, she’s got a baby in her, too.”
She might have been joking, and it really should have been if you had been truthful about your feelings for said best friend, but maybe this is the price you’re paying for so dutifully holding onto your dignity; so, instead, the deep undercut of her remark instigates a stirring irritation within you. Raising a questioning brow at your friend is all you can muster without spilling your secret as well as your brewing storm.
“Oh, so you actually do remember what I say when you’re only a minute from blacking out?”
“Hey,” your friend recognizes the anger seeping through your body language, stifling a giggle as she tries to bump your elbow and stumbles over her heels, “it was a joke, okay? I’m just looking out for my friend!”
“Right, what is there to even look out for?”
“Well,” she points a finger at the direction you had just been staring off into a minute prior and leans in to whisper, “you’ve been staring at the newly engaged man for much longer than the woman beside him, if that says anything—”
“—uhuh, as if, hey!” you almost yelp as you help her stand upright once again. A scoff of disbelief escapes your lips over the sight of your friend letting herself go. Grabbing her glass and swiftly placing it onto the tray of the many passing waiters, you squish her cheeks and give her a light pat or two. “The only person you need to worry about is yourself. Why are you even wearing those ungodly stilettos when you can’t even wear kitten heels without whining all day at work?”
“Hey,” Alex pouts, bending one knee and jutting her hips to show off those torturous pink devices on her feet. “I told you about my ex from high school, don’t you remember?”
“So it’s okay if you’re trying to impress an ex from high school, but I’m not even allowed to glance at my old best friend?” you quip, pressing your lips into a thin line as you take another gander at your friend up and down. “And what does excessive drinking even have anything to do with it?”
She flashes you a mischievous grin, “for confidence.”
“I can’t with you,” the roll of your eyes must have agreed, “and what about the classmate friend who actually invited you to her engagement party?”
“Oh,” Alex glances at the woman beside Jin and shrugs, “she’s alright. She’s that typical good girl. Too smart, too kind, too good at everything that you really want to hate her but have no reason to do so. I’m sorry, Y/N, but your best friend is devilishly handsome and I’m not surprised she’s marrying someone of her league.”
“Pfft, why are you apologizing to me?” you scoff, ushering her to the washroom and shaking your head along with the stream of confusing emotions that hit you like a truck. “Go wake yourself up before she or, gasp, worse yet, your ex spots you.”
“Oh my God, you’re right,” she gasps, shuffling in her skintight red bodycon dress and whirling around once more to call out before finally disappearing, “let me know if any boy comes looking for me!”
“Uhuh, yeah, sure,” you shoo her away, taking another sip from your glass and muttering under your breath, “...how am I supposed to recognize your high school classmates?”
Now that your friend is gone and you’re left all alone to your thoughts, you go against your own advice and down another glass of liquor.
You may have been his best friend but she is his fiance.
Well, if Alex is a good judge of character, then at least a good man like your best friend has found an equally respectful woman. It might have hurt to hear her words, but Alex isn’t exactly wrong. At the very least, you could sigh in relief having known you’re genuinely happy for your best friend’s future.
It’s just that the truth hurts sometimes.
Relief isn’t an excuse for lingering onto a soon-to-be-married man, regardless of when these emotions came about.
People are chattering all around you, strangers and former acquaintances are bustling about, familiar college classmates are greeting the bride-to-be’s high school classmates, and yet here you are: aloof and isolated even in a room of hundreds, fixated and more distant than you have ever been to the boy you had once cherished as the closest anyone could get to knowing the real you.
No one would know but Jin.
The real you.
The you who could not have moved on because she couldn’t recognize her own feelings until seven years down the road with a wedding invitation in hand, seven years after the buds had been sowed, seven years too late.
The one who stands pathetically here in the corner of a room, secretly hoping for him to approach her but also wishing for the night to pass unnoticed just like she had wished for her buried affections to pass.
So you shuffle in place awkwardly, pondering whether you should’ve caved into Alex’s pleas and attended this posh get-together, debating whether you should dip once your friend realizes her high school ex just isn’t worth it, sipping the remainder of opulent liquor and taking one last peek at the boy, when, your heart strikes loudly against your chest…
...because his eyes catch yours, a pair amongst hundreds, one invitee amidst an endless swarm of crowds, almost as if on a planned rendezvous, a secret unbeknownst to everyone in the room but the two of you.
Eyes widening in shock, the drums of your chest hammer against you, each strike pumping a nearly painful high that fuels your fight or flight mode. The debate between confronting your longtime friend and fleeing said friend did not even cross your mind at the start of the predicament. Quickly whirling around, head down and hands gripped to your drink, your feet move on its own.
A familiar series of clicks echo against the polished marble tiles. You don’t even have to turn around to recognize those homecoming footsteps, those awe-inspiring confident strides as he makes his way across the room. If this were you from seven years ago, you would have welcomed him with open arms and he would have claimed you were just acting sweet to bargain for some fresh pastry, but the unfamiliarity of a stranger you have yet to reconcile with has you in an unexplainable panic.
After all, it’s hard to explain why exactly his persistent pursuit after you, after seven years of distance, both emotional and physical, frustrates you to no ends.
Your hands form fists, your feet storm down the halls, and your mind could repeat nothing but the words you had excused as “just a light-hearted joke.”
You may have been his best friend but she is his fiance.
Don’t be a homewrecker.
A baby in her.
A baby.
His fiance.
A homewrecker.
The accusations echo and echo, as though screaming at you in the endless cave that is your mind, until the party fades, the crowd disappears, and the ear-piercing classical music wanes against the walls of your temporary solace, the bathroom. Finally, entrapped in a world of black—black tiles, wine colored walls, and dark red roses perched on top of what seems to be a black granite sink—you’re left alone to your thoughts.
Alex wouldn’t understand a seven-year-long regret because she doesn’t know the real history between you and Jin. In fact, no one invited to this engagement party nor does anyone in this whole mansion know of the soon-to-be groom’s past.
It isn’t as simple as people might make it out to be on the surface, because no one but you, Jin, and the street down your block had paid witness to a shoddy, spontaneous promise that should have never been made.
Turning on the faucet and splashing a fresh handful of cold water onto your face, your eyes eventually wander from the stream of water that flows down the drain up along the glass bowl of a sink and into the mirror to meet the sullen eyes of a girl, seven years older with a stain of regret that spans much longer that a mere seven years.
❀ ❀ ❀
“Waaah,” the boy exclaims as you watch your own reflection narrow its eyes at the image beside you. The spectacle persists to angle his chin every which way until he’s finally satisfied with the protrusion of his jawline; and as the boy resumes his daily activity of marveling at himself in awe, you have to wonder once again, for the hundredth time by now, just how you two had possibly become best friends. “Looking good, Jin. Looking real good.”
“Ugh,” you roll your eyes and feign nausea, “narcissist.”
Jin pauses in the midst of his inspection, allowing his phone to settle into his lap and turning to glance at you with his head as high—well, almost as high—as his ego. “When you look as good as this,” he gestures at himself and your eyes follow his crafty fingers up and down, “don’t even try to tell me you wouldn’t be all up in yourself.”
You blink your eyes blankly and start with the most accusatory tone you could muster, “excuse you, Kim Seokjin, but are you saying that I don’t look good?”
“You’re insisting that yourself, not me! It’s not my fault you can’t appreciate your God-given looks,” Jin raises his hands mercifully and you almost miss his latter, back-handed compliment when you become entranced by those double-jointed fingers of his. “Plus, I said ‘when you look as good as this.’”
“Psh, yeah,” you mumble, “and yet here you are, still as forever alone as ever.”
“Hey,” he snaps, narrowing his eyes at you even as he raises his phone to take yet another selfie, “and what does that say about you?”
“...and that’s exactly why,” you chirp as you hastily smush your cheek against his and throw a peace sign just as he snaps a photo, “we’re gonna be forever alone together!”
“Hey, why’re you ruining my selfie—” he pauses in the middle of his camera roll “—oh, we actually look good.”
Glimpsing at one of many candid photos of you and him, a helpless smile spreads across your lips. A warm breeze blows and you can practically smell the impending spring that breathes life into the pink buds hovering on the cherry tree above you. The sun’s embrace against your bare legs that lie beside your best friend’s on the red and white checkered picnic is a perfect compliment to the equally bright phenomena that are his high-pitched giggles; and like the many days you’ve spent the past year, the only thing that could possibly elevate this moment of serenity would be a bite of his weekly pastry batches.
Speaking as you chow down on the carbs, you quip, “you mean you look good?”
“That, too, but I meant us, together—” he articulates, cutting himself off abruptly when he snaps his head to find you digging into one of his many bread “—hey, who said you could start testing without me?!”
“Too many selfies, too slow, too hungry,” you lean your head back to plop the remainder of the custard-filled bread into your mouth, “shmorry Jin, but dish ish delicious.”
Just as you lean forward and take another large bite out of the batch, Jin catches right up to you, snatching the remainder and plopping it right into his now-stuffed cheeks instead. Lips falling agape at the disappearance of your bite-size donut, you gawk at your best friend whomst chomps happily away with your piece in his mouth.
You can still recall the heat of your cheeks after the first time he had ever proclaimed something that was yours as his—in fact, it wasn’t much long ago when Jin had nearly regurgitated a mouthful of mocha frappuccino after discovering you had sneaked in a sip or two prior—but now? Sharing commodities has become such second nature to you two that sometimes you wish he could return to his germophobic days just so you can hog all the food…
...and maybe to relive whatever magical flutters that had befallen you on that very first day.
“Of coursh ish delicious!” he manages to exclaim incoherently. “Kim Sheokjin baked it afta all!”
“Yeah,” you take a long moment to gulp and make room for more food, “I think I prefer the ones with custard—”
“—so it’s a perfect batch just like m—”
“—almost perfect.”
You could see yourself wink through the prideful glint in his eyes quickly plummet into a glare that has you laughing at the downfall of his indestructible ego. His playful glare through the corner of his narrowed eyes silently commences yet another one of your daily staring challenges. Maybe that’s why the two of you made such a perfect pair amongst the thousands of classmates at school. After all, how would Jin ever find someone as tolerant of his incessant dad jokes and perpetual ego as you are? And how would you ever find someone who would bake you goods and cook you lunch and, not to mention, spout such peculiar humor?
All of your classmates had dubbed the two of you as the perfect comedy duo—the dumb and the dumber, the silly and the sillier—that, apparently, is the essence of a match made in heaven, albeit probably meant to be more platonically than romantically.
Both too stubborn to lose, even in a meaningless game of a staring contest, not even the heat of the sun rays that has you two nearly sweating bullets could deter the match. Eventually, seconds turn into minutes and minutes turn into a frenzy frozen moment in time as you start to fall into the sudden abyss you found yourself in that is the warmth pool of his eyes.
Perhaps it’s the angle at which the rays strike theatrically on the apples of his cheeks, illuminating his dewy skin and enhancing the chocolate hues of his orbs hidden underneath the matching brown locks of his all whilst his eyes happen to be staring right back at you. You’ve never quite felt this way before—heart palpitating, throat constricting, and mind panicking—but for the first time ever, you’re hesitant in allowing your best friend to peer through the windows to your soul.
This isn’t good. What would he do if he were to discover your frenzy? Would he tease you to no ends?
Worse yet, would he falsely assume that you’re hardcore crushing on him…?
“Oh God,” you blurt out, breaking eye contact to avert your head to the side across the street. Your lips begin to mumble whatever comes first to mind, “uh, wow, look at that couple. Ugh, PDA—” your eyes flicker to find Jin raising a brow just before your eyes avert once again and he follows your line of sight “—am I right?”
“Oh c’mon! Just admit it,” Jin chides. “You’re only using this to disguise the fact that you were just about to blink, weren’t you?”
“I was not about to blink,” you insist but your shifty gaze tells the both of you otherwise, even if the true lack of confidence is unbeknownst to Jin. “You suck at staring contests. How many times have I won before? I was just distracted, okay?”
“Oh yeah?” Jin crosses his arms. “Distracted by what, then? Huuuh? By my devastatingly good looks?”
“No!” you exclaim almost too adamantly that you have to add in a nervous laugh at the end, which only has Jin staring at you in utter disbelief. Feigning an apologetic pressed smile, you gesture your hands in the direction of the couple supposedly hidden behind a fence but clearly exposed to those on a hill, otherwise known as you two. “I meant them—”
“—ew!”
The both of you exclaim in unison, selflessly covering the tarnished eyes of the other and ducking away from the moment of intimacy that you two had just intruded on.
“Aw, cmon! Even after graduation, too?” Jin remarks, mouth gaping and hands falling from your shielded eyes only to be thrown to his side in bewilderment. “Does everyone really have to remind us just how lonely we are even on our last day?”
“You mean how lonely we are and how lonely we will be for the rest of our lives?”
“For the rest of our lives?” Jin quirks a brow at you before shaking his head and shrugging. “Dang, that wasn’t exactly my plan, because the world will be forced to acknowledge my looks sooner or later, but I mean, in your case…”
“What?!” you gasp in disbelief, slapping his arm hard enough for him to wince. “What do you mean ‘in your case?’ I bet you haven’t even kissed someone yet!”
Jin snarls at you as he pulls his arm back and retorts, “yeah? And I bet you haven’t either!”
“Actually, I have, with Joon at that party last year,” you say smugly, crossing your arms with a chin held high, “and you just admitted you haven’t had your first kiss yet.��
“Psh, yeah, I haven’t, and?" the boy holds his head high akin to a child arguing with his body and not with his words. “Because I prefer to save it for something meaningful unlike someone here.”
“Hey, are you insinuating that it wasn’t meaningful?”
“You’ve always told me how much you hated parties!” he throws his hands up. “Plus, you don’t even like Joon! You said his breath stinks!”
“Well—” you pause but no words come to you except for a loud grunt “—ugh, fine. You’re right.”
“Of course I’m right,” he turns away, leaning into his right hand with an elbow propped against his crisscrossed lap. “I’m Kim Seokjin, after all.”
Following suit, you mumble into your propped hand, “I guess that’s why we’re friends in the first place. Together and, yet, still forever alone.”
“Hey, I said I don’t plan on being forever alone.”
“Right, right,” you brush him off, “tell me that when you actually get a girlfriend—actually, tell me that when you find someone to marry who doesn’t run for their life just one month into your relationship.”
“‘Marry?!’” he gawks at your demand. “I haven’t even had my first kiss yet and you’re talking about marriage?!”
“What?” you turn to face him, cheek resting in hand. “Didn’t you say the world would soon recognize your charms?”
“Hmph, well,” he says with a jutted lower lip, “definitely sooner than you.”
“Really?” you gape at his bold proclamation despite clearly being the one with the upperhand. “You really think you’re gonna get married before me?”
Your best friend doesn’t even bother glancing at you before answering, “bet.”
“Okay, if you win, then I’ll eat the crust to your breads whenever you want. I’ll even throw in a bonus for you and spare your wife from having to see fetus photos of you in college,” you can only snicker at the lightbulb that goes off in his widened eyes. “And if I win, then you’ll have to eat my crust and delete all the ugly photos you have of me on your phone.”
“Sorry, can’t do. That would take me an eterni—”
“—shut up.”
“Okay, fine, bet,” he cackles, straightening his back and stretching his arms out before him, “and what if neither of us ever get married?”
“Hm,” you purse your lips, “good point. Should we set a time cap to our bet? Ideally, if I want to have a stable job and income by 25, have children by 30, enjoy two or three years of marriage without kids, then…”
“Why do you have to have children by 30?” Jin frowns. “Why set all these unrealistic standards on yourself?”
Putting a finger to hush his lips, you almost find yourself distracted by the plush warmth against your skin. Quickly, you answer, “long story short: parents.”
“Ah,” he utters even as your fingers are pressed to his lips, “ditto.”
“Let’s set the cap to 27,” you propose. “If neither of us get married by the age of 27, then we’ll just call off the bet. But damn—” the two of you simultaneously lean your chins into your palms “—that means we’re really gonna be a disappointment to our parents forever, huh?”
A loud, heavy sigh escapes the both of you; and while you stay pouting into your hands, staring into the fresh green grass on the downside of the hill off in the distance, Jin props his hands back against the blanket and cranes his neck back to look off into the distant sky. You hadn’t noticed it until now, but for a devilishly dashing guy like Jin—broad shoulders, facial features that could only be gifted, and a prominent Adam’s apple, especially with his head rolled to the back like this—you have to admit his lonely status must have been much more of a choice to Jin than it is for you; because even for someone like you, his best friend who gets to stare at his profile for as long you desire in all its glory, you have yet to become desensitized to his dazzling visuals that is anything but normal.
As much as you hate to admit it, even now, with a clear blue sky, an array of warm pastry aroma, and a field of freshly cut grass, you can’t help but become enamored by the person before you.
And when another sigh befalls his lips and the two of you have settled into a comfortable silence and a breeze passes by the both of you, rustling a dozen or so of the hovering cherry petals to grace the surrounding air, he speaks.
“Let’s get married if we’re still single by then.”
“...huh?”
“I said,” only his eyes move to peer down at you effortlessly, “if we both lose the bet, then let’s get married.”
Your eyes pop and you can only utter the few words that reach you, “to each other?”
“No, to food,” he says sarcastically, grabbing a piece of his bread and stuffing your face with it when you continue to stare at him and he shuffles awkwardly in place. Looking away, he mumbles, “of course to each other, who else, dummy?”
“Uh….huh,” you blankly nod your head as a series of laughs are stifled by the bread. “Okay, and you’re being serious?”
He doesn’t look at you when he answers, “uhuh.”
“Pffft, and you’re saying you would keep that promise? That you would even remember this moment? We’re just gonna marry? Like that? And you’re assuming I’m just going to agree?”
“Hey,” he turns to frown at you, “why wouldn’t you agree? I’m offering you a once in a lifetime opportunity!”
Munching down on the bread, you continue to play along in amusement, “really? And what exactly are you offering me? You know I have high standards, right? I’m not just going to accept any proposal.”
“I know. That’s why you’re still single…” the boy deadpans, even as you glare at his remark, “...but, that’ll all change when you witness my proposal! Hear me out. First, I’ll cook every meal for you for the entire day.”
“You almost already do that except for breakfast.”
“Okay, but I’ll hone my skills by then. It’ll be even better than any restaurant we’ve ever been to.”
You raise a brow, “so you think food is the way to my heart?”
“No offence, but yes, that’s why we’re friends,” he quips before continuing, “second, I’ll bring flowers to you at work. Everyone at your job will be burning with jealousy!”
“Because of your public display of affection, which we both clearly disdain?”
“No, because they would wonder how you have such a handsome boyfriend like me!” he wags his finger. “Plus, who doesn’t like a little PDA when they’re about to be proposed to?”
“Okay, fair enough, but those are two promises you’re making for the proposal. A marriage is a lifelong commitment. Why would I want to marry you just for food and flowers?”
“Hmmm, even for someone like you, I’m surprised you have so many requirements,” Jin hums, tapping his finger on his chin. “How about this, I’ll make three more promises for our marriage.”
“Quit saying ‘our marriage,’ I keep shuddering at the thought of it,” you remark as you rub your arms.
“Third promise, I won’t break your achey breaky heart,” he deliberately emphasizes each word in a fruitful attempt to send shivers down your spine. “Fourth promise, I’ll remember all of my promises.”
“Okay… and fifth?”
“I’ll keep all of my promises! And I’ll do it all right here at this spot. Our spot.”
“What? That’s dumb,” you giggle. “Just keep it at four, then.”
“No,” he grabs the bagel in your hands and fills his mouth without a second of hesitation, “ish eashier to wememba fibe promishesh.”
“Right, right, right,” you nod, pressing your lips in a vain attempt to muffle your chuckles. “And what promises would you want me to make?”
“You?” he quirks a brow before shaking his head. “Nothing. You’re fine. I like you just the way you are.”
Huh. Has Jin always been this nice? Because you don’t quite recall ever feeling the heat of an oncoming blush of your cheeks or the bashful flutters that come with your best friend’s witty remarks. Maybe the topic of marriage has thrown you off today or maybe it’s the aftermath of a high having just graduated college and being thrusted into adulthood, but the stretched smile that adorns your lips is an undeniable fact that your confidence and spontaneity has reached its pinnacle.
Grinning, you lean across Jin’s lap to grab and unlock his phone to access the camera, “okay, wanna take a photo to commemorate this moment?”
“Gee, if you want a photo of me that bad, you could just ask me to send you a selfie, y’know—what the,” Jin starts to cackle when you raise the phone into the air and suddenly press your cheeks against his without warning. With a side-finger gun to frame his cheeks and chin, your best friend readies his pose as you wear a mischievous smile. “Hurry up and take the picture already, Y/N. My time is money.”
“Hey Jin,” you call out to him with your eyes still fixated to the phone screen, as does his.
The boy almost drags his words, “now what?”
“You’ve never had a girl kiss you on the cheeks before either, right?”
“What—”
—click.
“There,” you chirp jubilantly, grinning at the stunned look on his face, his eyes popping and his lips just slightly parted but failing to utter a single word as his hand grazes the spot on his cheeks where your lips had just touched, “now you have zero excuses to forget our promise!”
❀ ❀ ❀
That must have been the last time you had met up with Jin in person. Shortly after graduation, the two of you had parted ways as many are forced to do in order to embark on their lives as full-fledged adults. Being born with a silver spoon in his mouth, Jin had been lucky enough to receive a job offer straight out of college with the help of family connections; although, even without his family name, you whole-heartedly believe he still would have managed on his own based off of his unparalleled work ethic that you had the chance to witness firsts-handedly.
On the other hand, your parents had advised you to stay home, which happened to mean you would be stuck in the same town of your college, until you finally landed a decent job where you had met Alex and established a new life. Unfortunately, like life always does, all that busywork meant sacrificing contact with your best friend somewhere along the way.
“Hey, Y/N! Wait!”
“Ah, shit,” you mutter under your breath as you stop in the midst of your tracks down the black-marbled hallway, gritting your teeth and composing yourself just as you’ve done countless times around your less than friendly colleagues. Taking a deep breath in and out, you put on a pleased smile and whirl around to find the face of a familiar boy in your most recent reveries. “Ahh, hey, Jin... It’s been a long time, hasn’t it?”
“Ah,” the man, who seems to have grown at least or three inches since you had last seen him, scratches the back of his head. “I didn’t expect to see you here tonight… how have you been?”
This is awkward. So painfully awkward.
“Me? Oh, I’ve been alright. Life. Adulting. You know the drill,” you press a thin smile. “Actually, I’m surprised to be seeing you here tonight. I still remember us whining all throughout college over being forever alone, and yet here we are… at your engagement party… life can be funny, huh?”
“Y—” he stutters, scratching the back of his neck “—yeah… it can be.”
“So,” you chirp in a fruitless attempt to lift the suffocating atmosphere, “the wedding is coming up pretty soon! Feeling good or is someone getting cold feet?”
He shakes his head weakly, “I wear socks to sleep.”
“Wh—” you pause for a quick second, blinking blankly at his soft chuckle and following suit shortly after “—why do your jokes sound like you’re 22 again?”
The man shrugs with a helpless smile hinted in the corners of his lips; and when it happens—you don’t know how or when the silence had whisked you away into a past time—you find him gazing at you with that fondness of a sole friend who endlessly shared and fought informidable woes with you. Perhaps you’re a hopeless romantic frozen between the fork of two roads that have long closed, for you swear you can see your own reflection through his warm brown eyes and you surmise the only possible answer to the question that lingers in your mind.
He must see the same friend in you, that girl he would only call friend.
“You’ve been preparing your whole life for this, or, actually, maybe I should say we’ve been preparing,” you smile to stifle the lurching ache in your chest, “I guess I’m the only fool waiting for her turn now.”
A weep cracks the laugh you force out of your knotted throat. Immediately, you turn your head to avoid his watchful gaze and tuck a lock of hair behind an ear whilst discretely ridding any traces of waterworks welling in your vision. You think you must have gotten away with the feigned laugh and turn, a routine you had mastered at your previous work, but the gradual dissolution of the curve on his lips settles into an unreadable flatline more resembling a frown than anything; because even after all these years, he can still read you like an open book.
So, if he could see through your every facade even now, then why does he not remember? You know you shouldn’t hold it against him, such a silly promise built on a lonesome pair of naive hearts, but you can’t help it when a single word paints your conscience.
Why?
Why can’t he remember?
Your shared promises, your birthday, your memories, and... you?
“Y/N,” Jin begins gently, hesitating in place once he takes a step forward and you flinch, “about the wedding date…”
He waits for you to reply, supposedly for ‘whenever you were ready’, as he always does during those fragile lows of yours.
To avoid letting loose any more unneeded drama, you can only manage a hum, “mm?”
“I…” he pauses and sighs. “I know it’s your birthday.”
A hitch in your breath is audible. You clamp your lips tightly and nod, uttering lowly, “yeah.”
“I want you to know I didn’t decide the date, Y/N,” he says firmly, “my father did.”
“And?” you quip suddenly, eyes darting to shoot a glower deadly enough for him to twitch in evident hurt. There, you went ahead and did it. As hard as you had spent the past months muting your rawest reaction to the envelope in your mailbox, all the pent up frustration and sheer sorrow for a lost future came whiplashing just as hard. “And you couldn’t tell your father to change the date? Maybe one day after? Or two?”
“You know I would have asked if I could, Y/N,” he bites his tongue to state sternly, “but how would he understand? Change it for… for what—” he laughs cruelly in the midst of his burst “—for the birthday of a best friend I lost contact with for five whole years?! That’s so… so dumb—”
“—dumb…?”
The crack in your voice leads to a stagnant silence over what is clearly a no man’s land. Betrayal visibly paints across your face, the momentary display of having wronged his closest ally stains his own.
“Sorry, I didn’t meant that...”
“‘...yeah, you’re right,” you scoff, “I’m dumb for waiting five whole damn years’ because you wouldn’t fucking text me or call me to ask how I was doing!”
“Me?” he asks in disbelief, gawking and pointing an accusatory finger. “You wouldn’t even pick up your phone! I called you for a month after I moved!”
“I couldn’t pay for my phone, alright?! I was living with my parents and scrambling to find a job, any fucking low wage job, and I couldn’t sit all day in my room waiting for your calls because I’m not born with a silver spoon stuck in my ass!”
At this point, the conversation had somehow contorted into an all out brawl of words, a challenge to see who could blame the other for the unsaid confessions lost in communication. The two of you staring down the other, chest heaving and jaws clenching and brows knitting, if it weren’t for your fortunate location tucked in the hallway hidden from the main room, you would not have allowed yourself to fall, lost somewhere in the depth of his eyes.
“Why are you so upset?” a weak, hopeless laugh tumbles from his confused, pained expression. “Aren’t you supposed to be happy for me?”
“I—” something gets caught in your throat and you have to choke it out “—I am. I am happy for you. I’m not upset, no…”
Jin reaches a hand out to your cheek when he notices your tears but immediately retracts his notion when you flinch backwards. The boy frowns in concern, “Y/N… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell. How did I upset you?”
“Nothing,” you frantically shake your head that hangs low, using the back of your hands to smear every sign of contradiction on your face. “I just—” your breath shakes and an impending series of hiccups begins to kick in “—I’m silly. I should be happy for my best friend. I mean, I am happy. I’m just being dumb.”
“What?” Jin carefully takes a step forward. “No you’re not—”
“—I’m dumb, okay, Jin?” you finally muster the courage to lift your sights to find his own confused ones. “It’s been five whole years and I’m embarrassed for taking a joke of a promise so seriously when my best friend doesn’t even remember making it!”
The scrunch in his brows and lost resolution only reverberate the deafening ache in your chest. “The promises…? Y/N, I—”
“—it’s fine,” you blurt. Shaking your head and stumbling backwards, you look him straight in the eyes to say your last words before the fading knocks of your heels against the wood are all that he hears. “It's my fault for believing in a foolish fairytale anyways.”
❀ ❀ ❀
It’s almost like a fever dream when you recall just how confidently you had spat those spiteful words and furthermore dared to depart with that sheer satisfaction and the slightest aftertaste of alcohol residing on your tongue that night; but now that you’re awake, sober, and without the power of liquor, there’s nothing that can pull you out of your greatest nightmare most recently manifested into reality.
“Why the hell did I do that? Why the hell did I do that? Why the hell did I do that?”
The incessant grumbles tumble freely from your lips whilst you pace back and forth in the corner of the office. Typically, your colleagues would describe you as composed, reserved, and the level-headed half of an otherwise wild pair with Alex. This morning, however, they begin to question everything they’ve ever known about you as they watch through the corner of their averting eyes.
“I knew I shouldn’t have left you alone!” Alex hisses under her breath along with the threatening glares she shoots at the audience. Considering how long you’ve been going at your mental breakdown, it doesn’t take very long for your shuffling footsteps and mumbling gibberish to transcend into yet another white noise in the office; and once the majority of the passersby settle on the new revelation of your hidden crazed nature, Alex hastily storms to your side as you begin banging your head against the wall. “Why would you throw a tantrum at your best friend’s engagement party?”
“That’s exactly what I’m saying…” you pause momentarily to groan before proceeding to damage whatever is left of your seemingly deteriorating brain. “Why the hell did I do that? Why the hell did I do—”
“—not to mention, an ex best friend who never even knew about your unrequited feelings—”
—she comes to an abrupt stop when she finds the deadliest scowl in your dart-like eyes. No words are exchanged but the lethal consequences are clear enough to grant you her silence and the continuance of your destruction.
“Why the hell did I do that, Alex?” you whimper, taking a break from your antics because, damn, your forehead is really starting to hurt. “Whyyyyyyy did you have to leave me alone? Maybe Jin wouldn’t have found me and I wouldn’t have had to confront him over something that shouldn’t even matter anymore! I-I barely even know him… it’s been five years and, suddenly, here I am, voila! At his engagement banquet, yelling in his face and getting mad over feelings that aren’t even his fault!”
“I told you to go easy on the alcohol.”
“I told you to go easy on the alcohol,” you retort. Taking a deep breath, you let out a sigh along with the scowl plastered across your face. Your next words come out more as a helpless confession of fear than a rhetorical question to be answered. “Do you think he… hates me…?”
Alex observes you for a lingering second, perhaps contemplating between a merciful albeit exacerbating answer and a merciless albeit helpful answer. She speaks carefully, treading dangerous water, “well… would you like him to?”
“I don’t know,” you shut your eyes to heave yet another sigh because that weight in your chest refuses to leave you alone. An unapologetic swinging of the door and a series of loud, wide strided footsteps that follow have your brows furrowing and it takes everything in you and Alex, judging by the sudden shuffles you hear by your side, to finish the rare heart-to-heart conversation. “I think… I think if he hated me, maybe that would extinguish that part of me from the past. If he hated me, I would be able to get over it. Maybe I would hate him too, out of spite, but at least I would be able to get over—””
“—it…? Over what, Y/N?”
Over what? It takes you much longer than it should have for you to surmise the most probable answer to her question, an answer you were never willing to admit and an answer you aren’t quite sure you’re ready to admit even now.
“You know what I’m implying, Alex,” you sigh, shutting your eyes even tighter when a rising heat marks your cheeks. “I want to get over—”
—but your words are cut short by a familiar voice that has your heart racing and striking an unprecedented strife in the mayhem that is your systemic state...
“You can’t possibly hate me, Y/N,” he proudly proclaims and you can practically hear him smiling, “no one ever hates Kim Seokjin.”
...and when your eyes finally flutter open, you find the man, who had only seemed like a phenomenon of your feverish dream a second ago, standing before you and adorning that signature smile with raised cheek apples and crescent-like eyes that has yet to change under the influence of time and distance.
“W-What are you doing here…?” you barely manage to utter. Eyes flickering around your surroundings, from Jin’s broad shoulders that shield nearly the entirety of a helpless albeit buoyant Alex, to your colleagues who fail to discreetly whisper over the lavishly suited mystery of a man, and finally back to the bouquet of pastel flowers wrapped with a bright pink bow. Brows furrowing, you struggle to organize your thoughts and even go so far as to check for the dent in your reddish forehead in a vain attempt to dispel the mind tricks. When the mirage before you fails to dissipate into thin air like sand, you slowly turn to face the wall again only to have your antics disrupted by his refreshingly cold hand on your burning forehead ; and when you turn, you find Jin’s mischievous smile growing wider by the second. “H-how do you know where I work…?”
“I’m your best friend, Y/N. Have you somehow forgotten after all that head banging?” Jin scoffs in disbelief, gawking with a chuckle. Suddenly, he leans in to grab your right hand firmly in his own, squeezing twice as he had always done and leading you toward the exit. “C’mon, let’s go recover those memories of yours, eh?”
“Wait, wait,” you nearly stumble over your own feet at the pace he’s going, struggling to catch your breath when he bursts through the last door and a blast of freezing wind envelops the clash of the heat reverberating from your beating heart. “I have to go back! I still have work! And, and… and where in the world are you even taking me?”
“Tsk, tsk, tsk, Y/N, so many dumb questions for someone who always topped my grades,” the boy holds the bouquet of flowers out toward you, refusing to continue until you reluctantly accept his gift with your left hand against your chest. Smiling at your reluctant acceptance, Jin turns his back on you and proceeds to march into the parking lot but his now warm hands intertwined with your now cold hands never loosens its grip.
It’s been a long five years of waiting to finally relish in the hold of his familiarly slim, often teased albeit self-praised double-jointed hands, but, now that you’re finally living in it, you’re sure it was all worth it… even if the crashing flames at the end of this road is an inevitable, foreseeable future.
“Jin,” you frown as you stare at Jin’s opening of the car door and gesture of an invitation, reluctantly seating yourself in his sumptuous car. “I failed half of my exams... remember?”
The boy’s laughs can still be heard even through the closed door as he makes his way around the car front, all whilst swinging the keys in his forefinger. His cackling steps an abrupt many levels of decibels higher when the opposing door opens and he plops into the driver seat. “That never stopped you from boasting, did it?”
Without the flare of your usual clever quips, you purse your lips in silence and subconsciously hug the bouquet closer to your chest to keep his space as unoccupied by your presence. The sudden turn of events has your head spinning and your heart racing enough for the thumps to be felt by your hands.
How did he find out where you worked? Where was he even taking you and what was he planning to do with you? Why was he acting as if you had not angered him just two nights ago?
You don’t think you’ll be getting the answer any time soon, particularly the latter question, but when your stomach growls loudly, eliciting a crackle of a laugh from Jin, the awkward tension in your muscles eases ever so slightly.
“...s-sorry… I skipped breakfast.”
“I know,” he puts the car into neutral at the red light and turns to peer at you with a smug look that says he could still read you like an open book, “because you always skip breakfast. I hid some pastry in the bouquet.”
“What?” you scrunch your nose but immediately dive your scavenging hands into the flowers; and sure enough, you find your favorite cream-filled bread of his warm in your hands and you can’t stifle the smile that spreads on your lips. “Why would you even do that?”
“Well, in case you suddenly got really jacked and physically refused to come with me, then at least you would have something to eat.”
“No,” you giggle, “I meant why would you hide the bread in the bouquet…”
His eyes brighten like a lightbulb, as if only now recalling the genius plan he had crafted himself, “oh, because then you can sneak a bite without having to leave your desk! It always worked with our backpacks, didn’t it?”
Your sights fall to the bouquet and you can only reply with a sheepish grin, “right… it sure did.”
The engine purrs to life again when the light turns green and the remainder of the car ride is filled with the smooth drift of his ride and the ceaseless albeit completely welcomed humming from his lips. The old Jin never had enough of an incentive to drive, although his parents always suggested gifting him a brand new car and you had begged him to take the offer out of boredom and a never-ending desire to escape far away from university, but something about this moment in time has you feeling cozy, belonging, and at home. It’s almost like it was meant to be.
But the silver ring shining around his finger under the angle of the sun is a dreadful reminder that it isn’t.
So, as a slap to yourself back into reality, you fracture this perfect moment you would have once framed in that hopeless mind of yours, “so… how did you find out where I worked?”
“Ah,” his right hand casually slips onto the back of your headrest. “Still haven’t figured out, rank 292?”
“No, I haven’t, rank 295.”
“First,” he raises a finger, “I asked some people through the grapevines and eventually your friend Alex gave out.”
Grumbling under your breath, you curse, “damn it, Alex.”
“And second,” he raises another finger before proclaiming firmly, “I’m proving you wrong.”
“Proving me wrong?” you articulate with a scoff. “You’re going to prove me wrong? Right, keep dreaming.”
“I’m not going to prove you wrong, I am proving you wrong," he insists before shifting the car to neutral and leaning in toward you, gaze brimming with conviction locked with your own wary ones, as if ready to spill a secret sworn by the two of you and hidden from the rest of the universe.
He's close enough for his minty breath to graze your burning cheeks, to breathe a vigorous life previously unknown by your dull five years. Heart pumping and lungs barely working, daring not to budge for being caught under the sway of his gravitational force, you can hardly catch him when he finally speaks.
"I haven't forgotten, Y/N,” he utters, “I'm a man of my word."
❀ ❀ ❀
Promise one.
"I'll cook every meal for you for an entire day."
Promise two.
"I'll bring flowers to you at work."
His unabashed, overly detailed tactic to ask for your hand in marriage still echoes from a time long past. Hopes for those promises were weakened by each passing second but unequivocally unassailed at birth. Eventually, smothered and disheartened, you had been forced to cut ties and confront the reality of broken promises and broken dreams. You had once somehow convinced yourself things would never return to the ways they once were, and, yet, here he is having returned by your side and here you are enraptured by the utter joy in his laughs after all this wavering time.
It's like a dream come true; and if this indeed all just a nightmarish dream bound to death, you wish you never swore allyship to this alcohol, for now your only wish is for it to succumb you into a deep, long slumber.
“I toooooooold you I don’t like paaaaasta!” you whine, the drag of your voice manifesting in white puffs in the still chilly spring air. The sudden transition between the warmth of his house to the frozen world outside has you spiraling into a series of trips and stumbles; and as always, your best friend Jin is the only one to hold you up, which is a good thing considering how you would’ve been tumbling into the death trap of a river beneath this bridge. “So whyyyy did you make me pastaaaaaaa? Whyyyyyyy?”
“What? Why’re you blaming me?” he retorts, obviously taking offence. “You always loved pasta! You ate it every single day at uni!”
“I diiiiid love pasta,” you say through barely parted lips, “but it’s all just… just carbs, carbs, carbssss…”
“Since when did you care about carbs?” Jin frowns, poking your cheeks that lean against his sturdy arms. “Should I call the police?”
Your brows furrow and you lift your head to narrow your eyes at him, “what? Why?”
And as soon as those words slip from your lips and he raises his finger-gun hands, you wish you hadn’t asked in the first place.
“Because I think you’re an impasta,” his finger guns transform into jazz hands after you stare at him in dumbfounded silence, “...badumtsss….”
A series of empty blinks are exchanged, as if neither of you had just witnessed his most tragic dad joke to date; and so, you swiftly continue with a sigh, “I think… I think I started caring ever since heee mentioned I was getting fat.”
“I can’t believe you just ignored my unprecedented joke…” he grumbles to himself but lets out a little huff when he catches you from tipping over. Wordlessly, he hooks his arm with yours to keep you close to him. “And this ‘he’ you mention, who’s he?”
“Heee.”
“Who? Who’s ‘heeee’?” he spouts with pouty lips and a raised chin, flailings his body, and therefore yours, about every which way like a toddler. “Who’s this man I have to beat up, huh? He better square up!”
“I don’t think you could beat him up…” you mumble, eyes heavy but determined enough to reach his own flabbergasted ones. “It’s Jooooon, dummy, Kim-Nam-Joon, the boy I shared my first kiiiiss with…”
“Kim Namjoon?!” his eyes widen. “You think I wouldn’t be able to beat up that nerd?!”
You almost manage to push Jin away the foot of the bridge if it weren’t for his firm lock around you. “Have you seen his muscles?! He might not look like it with his books and all but he worked out all the time!”
“Yeah, well,” his lips sputter, “well, have you seen my muscles?!”
“No—” you freeze when you realize the sturdiness of his arm against your head is existing proof against your word, and maybe it’s because of his obvious flexing at this moment, but you could not believe just how built his arms had grown in the past five years, “—and I don’t want to.”
“Hah! You just don’t want to admit that I’m right. C’mon, I’ll show you. You feel it, huh? You feel it?” he flexes persistently, twisting and turning to maximize his little showcase. “So? You think I can beat him up now?”
“Well…” your voice trails off, mind clearly preoccupied with sticking your cheeks to his arm like glue in a somewhat fruitful attempt to hide the flush in your face. “You don’t really need to beat him up…”
“What?” he almost yells. “Why not? He called you fat!”
“Well, he…” your shoulders rise with each confession, “he said one of my dresses looked tight on me…”
“And?”
“...and he wasn’t exactly wrong…”
“So?”
“...so he didn’t actually say anything offhandedly…”
“What? You should’ve told me earlier!” Jin exclaims, arms thrown high into the air and consequently pushing your helpless self onto the hillside grass beside the run of the river. Lips gaping and eyes popping, you watch him in full offense as he mumbles to himself before resuming his stroll down the hill. “And here I am getting worked up over nothing… can’t believe I thought I could play hero for once…”
“Hey, Jin, what do you mean by that?” you call out to him. “Wait! I said wait for me, Jin!”
When your rhetorical questions are answered with silence, you hasten to your feet in order to catch up with those damn wide strides of his. Damn it, how did he make it halfway down the hill already? Each of your exclamations are unsurprisingly disobeyed by the boy who just throws his head back over his shoulder with that cheeky grin of his as he quickened his pace. Following suit, your strides turn into a jog and your jogs turn into a full out sprint until the both of you are full on running the 100 meters dash, one chasing and one fleeing, wind blowing refreshingly into your heated face and into your tangled locks and inflated lungs that relish in the breath of life.
In the midst of all the chaotic bliss of an epiphany, you find yourself screaming and laughing at the top of your lungs...
“Hey! Jin! I swear I”m gonna kick your ass!”
...and it’s at this moment in time that you realize having forgotten what it means to be a fool who lived and not to live to be a fool.
At some point in time, after having caught up to the knucklehead and giving a piece of your mind, the two of you settle down along the concrete ledge beside the river after a jittery, welcomed high. The sunset that followed was a pleasant surprise that had you two reminiscing over the countless mornings and evenings you had spent watching the sun rise and set together whilst churning throughout tireless exam nights. Pink, golden streaks now hidden behind a thick coating of midnight blue embellished by magical glitters all throughout, tonight’s stargazing becomes a first for the two of you.
As much as you hoped you could numb yourself from the inevitable aftereffects of this death wish of a dreamy day, you can’t help but smile, thankful to have been completely sober to engrave this night into memory.
“So...” Jin’s utter is the first to break the silence. He turns his head to give you a playful look of eyes that beams with wary curiosity, “...you started dating Namjoon after I left?”
“Mm… maybe,” you hum, “why? Got a problem with that?”
“What? Psh, what? Why would I have a problem with that?” he snorts. “The only problem I would have is the fact that you never asked me for permission.”
Your eyes widen, almost threateningly, “are you saying I need permission from a man to date another man? Not to mention a man who abandoned me without warning!”
“Okay, first of all, it’s not my fault you cancelled your phone plan! I called and called, I tried everything I could even though I was deadbeat tired every day. It’s not my fault I thought you hated my guts! So please just understand that I didn’t abandon you, alright?” he spills in an endless stream akin to a water faucet left on the highest setting, clearly a performance either practiced in private or incited by years of pent up pressure. You can practically see the steam shooting out of his fiery red ears and the accompanying whistle manifesting into words; and by the time his chest is heaving, his lungs are panting and very dramatically so, and his eyes flicker nervously between you and the passing water, you can’t help but snicker. Unsurprisingly, your lack of empathy elicits an unamused look on his face. “Hey, hey, what’re you laughing at, huh?”
“Me? Oh, nothing,” your hands move into your laps and you bat your eyes innocently, “it’s just that I can’t believe you’re blaming me, a helpless, poor girl with absolutely no connections, for cancelling her phone plan as a last resort to make ends meet.”
“Hey, hey, hey,” he warns with an accusatory finger, “don’t you dare think I’ll fall for that eye blinking and whatever cute act you’re playing up again!”
“Why?” you pout, almost cringing at your own antics. “Am I not cute?”
“No, you’re hurting my eyes. Plus, if anyone’s cute here,” he declares adamantly before puffing his cheeks and poking one with his forefinger, “it’s me.”
The both of you stare at the other for a stagnant few seconds, one completely dedicated to his performance and the other utterly flabbergasted by what plays out before her.
The only word you manage to crank out is a, “uh…”
“What do you think?” he raises another finger to poke his other cheek. “I practiced just for you.”
“Um… you’re 27 now, Jin.”
“So?” he tilts his head in the other direction. “Still 22 and young at heart.”
“Yeah? Then I’m still 22 and still equally disgusted by aegyo—” just as he parts his lips to provide another rebuttal, you quickly add in “—by your aegyo.”
And just like that, the man drops his boyish character just as quickly as he had stepped into it. He mumbles, dropping his hands and shooting an equivocate look at you, “okay, tough crowd. Sorry, ma’am.”
It shouldn’t have been that hilarious nor should your response been so delayed, but it only takes a split second of his surrender for a thunderous cackle to slip from your lips. Throwing your head back and peering at the dangling stars above, you allow yourself a moment to close your eyes and take a deep breath of the incoming wind. The fresh petrichor of spring and the earthiness of mowed grass whisks themselves into the cold, clean breeze from the vast body of water. Thin locks of hair grazes across your cheeks, swaying in the wind as does your spirit. Years are lifted from your shoulders and all that is left is the heaviness that remains in your chest; nevertheless, you have never felt so free from the past.
“Also,” he adds nonchalantly, cocking his head to look at you, “I wasn’t speaking from the position of a man. I was speaking as a best friend. As your best friend.”
And just like that, sitting side by side and sharing a cool breeze, it’s almost as if all these moments of remorse, spilled tears, and unreleased frustration were made to build the climax to this grand finale: the night you can finally speak your truth.
“It’s funny how things never change, huh?” you say when your eyes flutter open and you find Jin looking over with a fondness identical to the one you’ve spotted years before. “We can split for five years, thinking one hates the other’s guts, and reunite again as best friends… as if nothing had ever happened.”
Jin chuckles, hands grabbing to the ledge and head lolling back to join you but his eyes remain fixated on you, “I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or not. Are we vampires and we just don’t know it?”
“Yeah, well, I’m not sure either… not sure about the good thing and not the vampire thing, that is,” your laugh settles into silence when you spot the reflected light inflicted by the ring around his finger, sitting on the ledge just an inch away from yours. Close enough to touch but far enough to confirm an unequivocal truth. Sighing, you turn your head to meet his intent gaze with a bittersweet upturn to your lips, “normally, I really despise the idea of change; but lately, when I think about how things might never change between us, how we’ll always banter as a pair of stupid best friends, I start wanting it more than ever.”
Is this the moment? Is it all really happening right now? Judging by the course of your blithe actions, if change is what you’re looking for, then change is what will surely ensue after tonight. Whether for the good or for the worse, you’ll take a reluctant guess of the latter.
The man scrunches his brows before playing it off with a nervous laugh, “what do you mean things haven’t changed? You dated Namjoon, probably got it on a few times here or there—”
“—what—”
“—please don’t confirm,” he butts in with a raised hand, “and I have, too. Sure things have changed!”
“Ooh?” you raise a brow, genuinely shocked. “You finally got some experience under your belt? I’m impressed, Mr. Kim.”
“Hey,” he scolds, “what do you mean by ‘impressed?’”
“Well, I should’ve known… figuring you’re about to be a married man and all…” you mumble, forcing a smile despite the sudden dip in your mood. Turning your head to stare off into the opposite end of the river where the black silhouette of skyscrapers lie, you curse yourself mentally. You really thought you could get away with the inevitable truth for the entire day? “You know, I can’t believe I almost forgot that you’re getting married in less than a week. Almost like how I couldn’t believe you almost forgot our promises.”
“I told you Kim Seokjin is a man of his words.”
“You sure about that? Promise one: cook for me for an entire day. Check. Promise two: gift me flowers at work. Check,” you turn around once again to look him firmly in the eyes and it’s almost as if the both of you know what’s about to come next. “What about the three other promises, Kim Seokjin?”
“Y/N…” his voice trails off but his gaze never leaves yours, almost as if too afraid to be misconstrued as another betrayal.
Quick-mindedly, you chime, “stop looking at me so seriously! I’m just joking! Promise three: you won’t break my heart. How could you after a wonderful day like this? Promise four: you won’t forget our promises. Clearly, you remember. And promise five: you’ll keep all your promises. Check.”
“Y/N,” he stifles every wince but you can tell by the way his feet have stopped kicking into the void. “I don’t think I’ve kept all those promises.”
“Well,” you shrug, pressing your lips into a line tightly, “I only see checks in my book, Jin. You’re good to go—”
“—no, Y/N, you need to listen to me,” he says sternly; and when your mouth falls agape and your head slightly nods, his wary eyes searching for a steady sign in the windows to your soul, he continues calmly, “my marriage is actually an arranged marriage.”
“Your—” you blink blankly, jaw almost falling to the floor “—your, you, what?”
An arranged marriage.
All this time, all this pain, all this heartbreak of wanting to do something about your feelings but remaining hopeless because of an unrequited love… turns out to be an active, fully conscious decision? Not a falling out of love, not a helpless affection for another woman, but a matchmaking handcrafted without the heavens?
“My,” he has to stop himself just as his breath hitches, “my father... arranged it. ”
“What? Why? Is it because he prefers you with a well off family?”
“What? No,” he shakes his head with a slight upcurve to his lips that you’ve never quite seen before. Watching him hook a hand to the nape of his neck, clearly avoiding your eyes, you have an inkling of something much worse than the presented news. “You know my father would never do that… it has nothing to do with money...”
“But you left this town for money, didn’t you? For a better job, a better pay, a better life, and for the sake of your dignity as a dutiful son, are you telling me none of those were related to money?”
His eye twitches by your name-calling, clearly pained once again despite knowing very well of your precedent dislike toward his silver spoon background and his nonnegotiable obedience. Each second of silence culminates a tension even more formidable than the last. Guilt intoxicates your boiling blood enough for you to bite your tongue and hold yourself back; because after accusing him of holding onto his dignity, you, yourself, could not forfeit that of your own either.
Worse yet, you’re a complete hypocrite.
“Why can’t you just tell him to call it off?”
You never knew silence could be so deafening.
“So… so do you...” you begin hesitantly. Usually, with your eyes locked with his, a thousand words would have been exchanged with each passing second; but now, with gazes that wade through the tides of the unknown, for the first time ever, you don’t recognize the mystery before you. “Do you... love her?”
His lips part slowly, but no time in the world would be enough for him to find the right words. To you, his silence is as clear as any possible answer. Something sinks in you, perhaps after acknowledging the implications behind his choice to leave your question unanswered, but your blood boils from the audacity of those apologetic eyes that, even now, never stray from yours… as if this minute of sincerity would be enough to mend the inevitable decade of scars.
You begin slowly, failing to hide the shakiness of your deep breaths, “...then what about the baby?”
“What baby...?” his face contorts with a frown until, out of the blue, something flickers across his numerous expressions: confusion, remembrance, contemplation. His hesitation that ensues might have been fleeting but its infliction upon your shattered trust will surely remain. “Oh, that… that was just a rumor my aunt spread because of the sudden marriage.”
“And,” you force yourself to breathe, scattering for something, anything to throw at him, “and you don’t think you could’ve told me sooner?”
The man scrunches his brows, “and that would’ve helped, how?”
“‘How?’” you repeat, as if it was the dumbest question you had ever heard. Mirroring his expression, your eyes avert between him and the river as scoffs of utter disbelief escape you. “‘How?’ What do you mean ‘how?’”
“I mean exactly that!” his voice suddenly escalates to a level of frustration you’ve never quite heard from him before. “How would it have changed anything? Why would you need to know earlier?”
Gawking, you exasperate desperately, “you know why!”
“No, I might be your best friend but don’t expect me to just read your mind!”
“It’s cause...” you swing your leg over the ledge to face the sidewalk with your back on Jin as soon as you could feel an incoming constriction at the back of your throat, a notorious sign shared just between the two of you that waterworks were about to appear. Breathing slowly and doing just about everything to keep your voice from shaking, and fruitlessly so, you mumble before standing to your feet, “...you know what? I don’t even know anymore. I’m sorry. Nevermind.”
Why did you ever think you would have a chance?
Is this it? Is this really it? The end?
The questions come crashing into you as you make your retreat, head hanging low and palms drying the inconvenient tears that mark your face. After all the confidence you had built up, after finally thinking—actually, believing—you could get over him tonight, how humiliating is it that you’re now running away from a reality that would eventually and inevitably engulf you?
The worst part of it is, Jin, like the best friend and good man that he is, persists to chase after you. You don’t have to hear the quickened footsteps of his usual wide, well-paced strides to know he’s coming. You don’t have to hear the calls he makes on the top of his lungs for you to know he’s on his way.
As someone who so helplessly fell in love with their best friend, you just know he would be there through thick and thin—whether you like it or not.
“Y/N!” Jin hollers; and when he finally catches up to you, having to sprint and consequently inciting for you to surrender with an abrupt stop to your path, every bit of air is knocked from your lungs. Arms wrapping over your waist and enveloping you into a tight hug, you can feel his heart pounding against your back.
To most, it should have been the perfect method to comfort a crying friend; so, damn it, why does it only make you cry harder?
“What?” your voice cracks as you just barely manage to smear the following tears within the wrap of his bear hug. “Damn it, Jin, why can’t you leave me alone for once?”
Head resting on yours, his voice is muffled by your hair as he murmurs, “I can’t just leave my best friend crying like that. I shouldn’t have yelled. I’m sorry.”
He embraces you. He embraces you not only physically through the silence but also through the emotional rollercoaster that comes with it. He, Kim Seokjin, your best friend, holds you through the ups and downs and the rights and the wrongs. He even holds you now, comforting you in the hurricane that you brewed without ever knowing and never caring that he had, in fact, not committed any wrongdoing. If anything, you must be in the wrong.
And when you put it that way, how could you blame yourself for falling in love with him?
“Jin… I’m sorry, I tried everything to stop myself but,” your voice shakes but your courage prospers, “but I just, I just really, really love you.”
A second passes.
Now, two.
Then, three.
Something strikes against your chest when the surreality of the situation settles into reality. His silence could mean many things, but the tightening of his embrace could only mean one. Blood flushes your cheeks as you lament over his sensation of your fervent heartbeats. Secrets thrown out into the spring air, your heated cheeks are equally exposed to the passing, chilly zephyr.
He knows you love him. At this moment, he can physically feel the proof of your love and there’s nothing he can do about it.
“Sorry,” you manage to blurt under your breath, “I shouldn’t have said anything. Forget I said—”
—the remaining words dissipate into thin air when he places his hands firmly on your shoulder and whirls you around. Face just inches away from his, you barely catch wind of his declaration before the unthinkable occurs…
“Too late. I don’t want to.”
...and his lips meet yours.
It’s everything you have ever imagined. Years of admiring those plush lips, wondering what it would be like to feel the warmth of those wonders pressed against yours, are finally coming to fruition… except they don’t. His hands fall from your shoulders to the small of your back, but your hands don’t intertwine behind the back of his neck like you imagined. Instead, they hover in midair, hesitant to embrace him in your arms. Why? With your eyes and his fluttered closed and an audible deep sigh that signals a desire finally satisfied from the both of you, reality still manages to twist a dream-come-true.
Does he actually love you or does he only pity you?
Finally, and ever so suddenly, your hands firmly push against his chest to plant an arm’s distance from you and him.
“Sorry…” you pant, avoiding those intense eyes. “We… we can’t do this.”
“What?” Jin raises a brow, taking a step forward as you take one back. “Why not?”
Wordlessly, you point at his ring finger.
“Oh,” he chuckles nervously, hand scratching the back of his neck. You can only watch his every move, your stare gradually becoming a glare. Rosy hues coloring his cheeks, he speaks sheepishly, “I forgot we’re in public.”
His nonchalance irks you to your core. There isn’t any other way to put it. Blithe and dense have always been your favorite traits of his, but now that he’s here? Planting buds he could never sustain and sending mixed signals despite knowing of your feelings in an unfitting circumstance were never things you knew Jin for.
“I-I don’t get it, Jin,” you shake your head. “I don’t think we should see each other any more. In any context. Not even after the wedding.”
With his hands buried into his pockets and shoulders high enough to hide his reddened ears, he glances up at you, alert. “What? Why? What don’t you get?”
“It’s ‘cause... I just don’t get… this. I don’t get us,” you articulate, struggling to find the right words. “Why are you so… nonchalant about this? Why are you kissing me? Is it out of pity? Is it because I said I liked you—”
“—Y/N,” he says lowly like the drop of his previously cheerful mien, “you know I would never do something like that.”
“Then why?! Why are you doing this to me? Do you love her or not?” you pause for a second to stifle the crack in your voice but, alas, all is in vain. “...and do you even… love me?”
He frowns, the tension in his body evident by the knitting of his brows as he struggles, “I… Y/N...”
“So you can’t admit that you love her and you can’t even lie to say you love me. So why the hell are you throwing away an entire marriage just to kiss me?” your scoff comes out more so like a plea. “You’re confusing me, Jin—”
“—that’s,” he abruptly pauses to stop himself from exploding, taking a deep breath before continuing, “that’s exactly why I can’t say it, Y/N! I don’t want to confuse you. I don’t want to disappoint my father. I-I don’t want to complicate matters more!”
“Then why the hell did you kiss me?!”
“I don’t know, okay?!” he throws his hands in the air. “I don’t know! It was a spur of the moment! I couldn’t stop myself from chasing after you and when I hugged you—I-I just wanted to, alright? I’m sorry.”
He’s... sorry.
Sorry for kissing you, sorry for acting as if your feelings had been reciprocated, sorry for breaking all the promises he made and pretending like he was going to patch things up again tonight. Speaking your mind and hearing his words are all that you need to finally understand what you need to do. Your heart drops but you hold your head high because your final verdict is the right thing to do. Maybe this time you’ll finally be able to cease these useless feelings. What's the point in pursuing a hopeless love?
The only one you would be hurting is yourself.
This epiphany, in itself, is enough to drape an ephemeral clarity over your frenzic self; and just like a bandaid over a scar, you’re able to function, if only just temporarily.
“Hey, Jin?” you call out softly to the boy kicking at nothing on the bare sidewalk. It’s hard not to melt under the delicate glance he throws over his shoulder. “I’m not… mad. Well, I kind of am. But that doesn’t change the fact that I’m sorry for everything that I said about your upbringing. I know how close you are to your family. I’m sure you’ve been under a lot of pressure…”
“No, Y/N,” he shakes his head, turning his body to face you with a low hanging head, “it’s my fault. Even considering all that, I still shouldn’t have done that or any of this. I… I’m sorry for confusing you.”
Forcing a composed smile, you persevere, “do you have your fiance’s number?”
Head lifting with a frown, he answers, “yeah, what kind of a fiance would I be if I didn’t? Why though?”
“Right,” you say to yourself under your breath, hearing his ‘fiance’ echo relentlessly in your head. “I just need it, okay? To… to sort out everything...”
And just when you wonder how insensitive could this boy get...
“What?” he chuckles. “Are you going to fight for me?”
...it gets worse.
Rolling your eyes, you give him a hard, well-deserved slap against the chest before snickering at his loud wince and declaring your one last confession of the night.
“No, I could fight for us, but I won’t singlehandedly fight for you,” you then declare with a bitter smile, “I will, however, tell her how jealous I am.”
And that's your most irrefutable confession, one that has Jin stupefied for the future midnights to come.
❀ ❀ ❀
Morning arrives much sooner than you had anticipated. White puffs mark the air whilst you wrap yet another layer of scarf around your neck. It seems as though the breeze from a night ago had intentionally danced around town, lingering and spectating on the resolution of your five year long love conundrum. Ironically enough, the two of you reunite at the very spot where everything had first started… except this time, everything will finally end.
The pain he had marked in you inflicted by the words he could not bring himself to say still stains your every waking second.
“You have to do this. You can do this,” you incessantly chant to yourself, pacing back and forth beside the most prominent cherry blossom tree in town. “You have to do this. You can do this—”
“—Y/N, is that you?”
What you presume to be Youngji’s voice perks your ears. Looking up, you spot her holding a phone in her hands as she flickers between you and her screen. A quizzical quirk of the brow plasters across your face as you wave at her and she jogs over to you as quickly as she could in that pink, wool poncho and those tan, fluffy boots. “Hey, Youngji, right?”
“Yeah,” she says in between each pant of breath, “that’s me.”
Her hands immediately find refuge on her knees whilst she bends over to catch her breath. Typically, you’re the very self-aware type, but there isn’t anything you could do to stop yourself from staring. The girl strikes you as… flamboyant. With her dark red pigtails, bright smile, and dainty attire, she’s everything you’ve always imagined a female version of Jin would be like. It’s hard not to wonder… maybe an arranged marriage really can be a match made in heaven, but you force yourself out of that rabbit hole before having another breakdown in front of an innocent stranger.
The tang of jealousy, however, refuses to budge.
“Sorry, for,” she pants, holding her hand up to show you her phone screen, “calling out to you like that.”
“No, it’s fine,” you squint at the sight of the screen displaying a candid photo of you, taken on this very street on that very day, as you stuffed one of his breads in your mouth. Drawn on your face is a mustache and a unibrow. “Did Jin do—”
“—Jin gave me a terrible reference photo.”
Scoffing, you cross your arms, “damn it, Jin.”
Youngji crackles into a firework of uncontrollable laughter, rendering you stupefied. After a literal minute passes by, she finally manages to speak in between the bursts of giggles that follow, “you two—” giggle “—really are—” giggle “—close, huh?” And as a grand finale, she slaps her stomach with a loud sigh of relief that her laughs have come to an end. When she notices you staring at her bewilderedly, a light bulb flashes through her as she gasps and feigns a whimper, “o-oh! Ow! M-my baby!”
“You know you don’t have to pretend, right?” you can only let out a laugh of disbelief because you still can’t take in the mirror image your best friend. “Jin already told me about the fake pregnancy.”
“Oh, in that case,” she smiles widely before giving her stomach one more big, satisfying slap, “see, you guys really are so close!”
“I… I guess. I’m not sure if taking me out for one day after five years of radio silence really counts as close, though,” you then quickly add in with raised hands, “he only did so out of obligation, though! I swear it was nothing more!”
“Hmmm?” she hums, leaning in a curious ear with a cheshire-like smile. “Is it because of those promises he made?”
“...yeah, wait, he told you about those?”
Of course he did, idiot, they’re engaged.
“Well, something like that,” she shrugs, “so how much did he tell you?”
“About?”
“About the wedding, silly!”
“Uh, nothing much really. The pregnancy was a false rumor, the marriage was arranged by his father…”
“Father?” she inquires, watching you closely with those big, round eyeballs of hers.
“Yes?” you hesitantly nod. “Father?”
“Ah,” she nods, as if she finally catches drift of something, “I see.”
“Oh yeah,” you add, “I also found out it’s on my birthday.”
“What?!” her eyes grow wider, if they even possibly can. “Jin never told me that! What the heck, man? A wedding? On his best friend’s birthday?!”
“Yeah, yeah, I know right?” you nod passively before coming to an abrupt stop. “Wait, what? Why does it matter to you?”
“Of course it matters to me! You’re Jin’s best friend, aren’t you? You have no idea how much he talks about you back home. I know you so well that sometimes I feel like you might be my best friend,” she chimes before reaching out to cup your hands in hers. “Let’s celebrate properly with Jin after the wedding, okay?”
“Um, sure…”
But you don’t exactly plan on unnecessarily sticking around his life for any longer than the wedding… except, seeing how close she must be with Jin in addition to her loose-lip impression, you decide not to tell her that.
“So,” she drops her hands to the side, “what did you need to tell me?”
Why did you call her to meet you here again? After witnessing her flamboyant entrance, it’s hard for you to keep yourself from derailing.
“Oh, um,” you scratch the back of your head awkwardly, “I just wanted to meet my best friend’s fiance, that’s all.”
“Ahhh, I see.”
The woman pauses, nodding at you intently almost as if waiting for the real intentions to be revealed. Damn it, either you’re a literal open book or she reincarnated from the same soul as Jin’s.
“So…” you purse your lips. “Are you okay with it? The arranged marriage, I mean?”
“Well,” she shrugs, finally dropping the smile from her lips. “At first I hated the thought of it. I felt like I didn’t really have a choice, but… when I met Jin—” a smile is hinted in the corner of her lips and in the sparkle of her eyes “—I thought ‘I’m pretty lucky girl, aren’t I?’ I think the world must have finally taken pity on me.”
A soft, stifled laugh slips from you as your eyes fall to the ground and a bittersweet smile accompanies your lips, “yeah, you’re pretty lucky.”
“Don’t get me wrong though,” your eyes immediately shoot up to find her raising defensive hands, “it wasn’t some sort of a love at first sight. He’s handsome, sure, but—”
“—a marriage is a lifelong commitment—”
“—exactly,” she sighs, “I didn’t really know him, but when I was forced to spend time with him… I thought if I had to get married, then he would be the best option. He’s not a bad guy.”
“No,” you smile in your reverie, shaking your head, “he's not a bad guy at all; and when you really get to know him, his stupid dorky self, I think it’s impossible not to fall for him.”
“Yeah?”
“He’s mean when he jokes around but he’s actually very kind, he’s sensitive when you poke him where it hurts but he hides it deceptively well, he’ll apologize for being wrong when the both of you clearly know you’re in the wrong, he’ll cook and wear the hottest pink clothes he can find because ‘to hell with societal norms,’ he’ll tell you the dumbest dad jokes but I promise you’ll get used to them eventually, ” you let out a reminiscent laugh that comes out more like a sigh, “and, sometimes, very rarely, he’ll hurt you unintentionally, of course, but he’ll always go out of his way to make it up because that’s just… that’s Jin. That’s my best friend.”
A breeze passes by to perfectly mark the end of your cadence. Branches rustle above you and freshly budded cherry blossom petals flutter their way toward the grass underneath the two of you only to be risen once again by a following zephyr. Having been there throughout his and your lives, it’s almost as if the long-standing tree is agreeing to attest to your words.
“Wow,” Youngji finally says after witnessing your truthful albeit embarrassing spoken love letter, “I… I wouldn’t doubt any of it… but why are you telling me? Shouldn’t you be telling Jin?”
“I’m telling you, because,” you emphasize, “because I'm jealous of your position but I can't do anything about it so I want you to take good care of Jin. I just… I need to know he’ll be in good hands. I want him to be loved like the way that he loves. You’ll do that, won’t you?”
Youngji just nods. It’s the most somber response you’ve ever seen from her. Almost like the joining of hands in marriage has finally become reality.
“Do you…” you struggle to squeeze out of the knot in your throat, “do you love him…?”
“Y/N—” she begins but suddenly lets go of whatever she must have had planned “—yes, yes I do.”
“And… you’ll take care of him?”
Youngji bobs her head lightly, “yes, I will.”
“Promise?”
“...promise.”
“Okay, then I’m entrusting him to you, and,” you smile, leaning forward to shake her hands before heaving one last sigh, “and this time, please keep the promise.”
❀ ❀ ❀
A curse sinks into the thickness of the sapphire dusk that quickly descends upon the hushed city. Keys tinkle to decorate the silence of tonight’s resting wind, a silence that would have been accompanied by an equally passive woman and an oblivious man whose hands persist to fumble to his guest’s dismay.
Standing before a small willow, vintage-looking store tucked away in the corner of downtown, an inaudible breath ascends a cloud of white that momentarily shrouds the grand interior peeking from spotless windows that line the exterior. Golden warm studio lights illuminate the gorgeously exquisite ivory gowns from the trailing trains up to its waterfalls of dainty veils. Velvet suits and satin neckties accompany each headless mannequin, welcoming each passerby to imagine themselves in their wildest fairytales… your hand in his and his in yours as a fleeting moment becomes a sealed promise of a lifelong loyalty.
Breath completely taken away, you, yourself, almost fall prey to your own far-fetched dreams.
“I thought I said we shouldn’t meet up anymore,” your forced mutters drag you from your short-lived reveries, “why did you bring me here?”
“You said we shouldn’t meet up anymore, yet here you are,” Jin chirps before cheering to himself under his breath once the key finally clicks into place, “yes! Old man must have purposely given me these rusty old keys.”
Crossing your arms, you retort, “I came because you said your close friend from home would be here, too.”
Turning around to face you with his back to the door and a hand on the golden knob, he raises a quizzical brow, “and… are you not my close friend from home?”
“I thought you meant the other—”
“—this is my home, Y/N,” he says firmly, looking straight at you, “and I want my best friend to see me in my wedding suit before anyone else.”
“But why me…?”
“Because I only care about your opinion.”
He answered without hesitation, but in your head you figure he must have forgotten about Youngji, the true spotlight of the show.
Gritting your teeth, a staredown begins between the two of you; but the longer you face those unequivocal looks of determination in his eyes, the hotter your cheeks become in the middle of a contrastingly chilly night.
“Alright, fine.”
“Thanks,” he gives you a small, lopsided smile before pushing the door open with his back and ushering you in with a slight bow, “ladies first.”
Your eyes roll but not for very long when you step foot into the store and your mouth falls agape. The ceiling is much higher than you had perceived from outside, the sides are lined with grand, wooden staircases that lead to a second floor where hundreds upon hundreds of white dresses and black suits find purchase along the hangers, and the click of your heels against the marble tiles of the entrance floor echo into the extravagant expanse.
The wooden insulation of the store proves infallible when the door closes behind Jin and the shrewd air leaves you to a much more bearable surrounding. Standing affixed to the entrance, you watch as Jin strides toward the carpeted floor where a taupe curtain hanging from the ceiling drapes over a raised platform sits across its partner platform in the opposite of the room.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so enraptured by something aside from me,” Jin chuckles as he begins stripping the suit off of a black, velvety mannequin before pointing at the mannequin standing beside the opposite platform, “oh, why don’t you try on some dresses while I’m at it?”
“What?” you scoff, finally taking a step onto the carpet. “First off, I never stared at you like that before. Second, why the hell would I do that? It’s your wedding, not mine.”
“I asked the store owner for permission and picked a dress for you to try on,” he continues, finally stopping in the midst of unbuttoning his white, collared shirt when he looks up to find the fear in your eyes. “Hey, haven’t you always wanted to try one of these?”
“Yeah,” you laugh in disbelief because he actually listened to your past rambles, “but never under these circumstances.”
“C’mon, you never know if you’ll ever have a chance like this again,” he gestures once more when he notices the start of your contemplation, “c’mon, go on!”
You really don’t want to. It’s that nagging feeling of something going completely wrong tonight if you were to succumb and let yourself go. After all, your worst fear is yourself. It doesn’t feel right and you begin to wonder if it’s alright for you to hold onto this moment you’ve always dreamed about: dolling up and swearing your vows side by side with Jin.
If you were to live out your fairytale, just for tonight, would you finally be able to sleep dreamlessly at night?
“...fine,” you groan and storm across the room, tossing your purse into the ruby sofas and stepping onto the platform. Turning around to face a gleeful Jin, you’re about to scowl at him until your eyes flicker between the cheeky grin on that youthful face and those sculpted abdomen of his elevated by the lighting above. Cheeks flushing red, you gulp at the unseen sight before clutching the curtain in your hands and swinging it closed with a mumble, “and at least have some decency and use the curtains, God damn it…”
The freezing touch of your hands doesn't hold a candle to the heat of your face. Trying to calm your racing heart, you curse to yourself at the way he merely cackles at you and, even worse, the way your heart intensifies in response.
“Yes, ma’am!”
“...shut up,” you say more to yourself and your deafening heart.
The gown standing before you, however, is no help to your case either, for when you glance over the dress, the long train that could awe an entire room, the complimenting silhouette that doesn’t scream too over-the-top but enough to fulfill the little girl within you, and the classic lace sleeves that you’ve gushed over whilst skimming through magazines, you realize Jin had always been attentive even when he was stuffing his face with bread or even when he was being petty over an argument and you tried to rectify with incessant small talk.
It’s at this moment that you acknowledge the rabbit hole you had just willingly fallen into and the impossibility of its towering escape.
“So,” Jin calls out to you as the sound of rustling clothes fill the silent air, “what do you want for your birthday tomorrow?”
“My birthday? Oh, right,” you slam palm to your forehead, having dwelled over the marriage and consequently forgetting your own birthday. “Uh, nothing really. I haven’t really thought about it this year.”
“Really? You? Y/N? Not planning her own birthday?” he gasps. “Who are you and what did you do to Y/N?”
“Oh, shut up. With age comes other problems to deal with...”
...problems like you.
“C’mon,” he chuckles. “You have to have something. You can’t tell me you’ve gotten every single thing checked off of that old ‘birthday gift ideas’ list you gave me.”
“I mean… I wouldn’t say I’m very far from it and it’s not like you were actually going to give me everything I asked for. Say, what did I even have on that list?” your eyes wander to the towering curtains that envelop you as your hands reach behind to the buttons on your back. “A bowl of your tofu soup, some pocket money, a matching sweater, a pair of earrings, a necklace, and a… ring.” The word slips from your lips and it floats in the stagnant air before you can even do anything about it. His silence rings in your ears, so you quickly add in, “but I don’t want materialistic stuff like that anymore.”
“...oh, really?”
“Nope,” you heave a heavy sigh and pat the poofy material of the skirt down, “I think I’ve come to realize that… I just want to be loved. I don’t need a dress or a necklace or a ring… you wouldn’t understand, but I don’t just want to hear those words. I want to feel them. I want to be loved.”
But only by him.
A lingering silence drifts long enough for you to start panicking until, finally, he answers, “no, I understand.”
“...well,” you quickly chirp as you fumble with the lacey material of your dress, “enough about me, what do you want for your big day, hm?”
“Why would I need a present from you?” he remarks. You can hear him finishing his final touches and you can barely stop your heart from leaping out of your chest. “You’ve given me enough already.”
“You mean I’ve given you enough earfuls and tears,” you retort, clutching onto the curtains as you shut your eyes to muster every courage within you. “Isn’t there anything I can give you? Anything you want?”
Counting down to yourself, the curtains and drawn open in one, swift swing; and when your eyelids flutter open, you find him standing on the platform across from you, dressed in a classic black and white suit with the curtains clutched in his hands like a mirror image of you. He glances over you from head to toe, as you do to him, until the both of you settle in each other’s gazes for what seems like an eternity, willingly lost and ever-so-enraptured.
You almost forget this isn’t actually your wedding.
“This,” he answers with a soft smile, “this is enough.”
“...stop it.”
JIn frowns, “stop what?”
“Stop… looking at me like that,” you articulate, hands covering your bashful grin. “It’s making me feel self-conscious.”
“Hey, it’s not my fault I have such a good eye at picking clothes for you!” he says whilst pointing an accusatory finger. “I guess 22 year old Jin had a pretty good sense of fashion after all.”
“You picked this five years ago…?”
The man shrugs but his high chin says otherwise regarding his humility, “I told you Kim Seokjin is a prepared man of his word.” Eyes peering across to wink at you, he continues a bit more seriously, “I might not be able to fulfill all of our promises, but this is the closest I can to it.”
“Jin… you’re…” you laugh in disbelief, bashfully avoiding his intent gaze, “...you’re so incredibly stupid that I can feel it from all the way here.”
“Oh, yeah?” he grins mischievously and takes a step toward you and off the platform. “How about now?”
“Stop it, don’t spread your stupidity to me.”
He spreads his arms out wide whilst taking another few steps forward, “why not? Aren’t we supposed to be together through thick and thin?”
“No, not really,” you adamantly shake your head amidst a hysterical fit of giggles, “don’t come any closer.”
“Oh, no,” he feigns worry. Another footstep. “I can’t stop myself.” He approaches even closer. “The stupidity is spreading!”
With him just a footstep away, you cower behind the shield of your hands, “stop it, stop looking at me like that—”
—and just as you squeal, his arms wrap around you to pull you into a tight embrace.
Like two lost puzzle pieces, his hands fit perfectly in the small of your back and his chin rests comfortably in the crook of your neck. His hair grazes against your burning cheeks. His scent envelops you into a rosy haze. He could probably feel the beat of your chest against his, but you wouldn’t know when you’re preoccupied by the thuds of his own. You had never been aware of the lonesome emptiness you’ve felt all these years until now, under the warmth of his touch that completes your other half.
You almost forget to breathe until he takes a deep breath and lets out a slow, dreary sigh.
“You are so beautiful.”
Under any other circumstances, you would have smacked him for lying. Perhaps it’s the stir of the starry skies or the impending occasion or even the look he made on his way to you with a gaze that oozed with absolute adoration, but something tells you he’s being his genuine self tonight… and that’s what you fear the most.
“You shouldn’t be saying that, Jin,” you say, stroking his head buried in your shoulder, “and you shouldn’t be looking at any women but Youngji with those eyes.”
Whether he’s quietly reflecting or stubbornly disagreeing, Jin remains silent. His breath entangles with yours, syncing with the wavelengths that you two have been running for an ongoing seven years and, perhaps, beyond.
He frustrates you to your wits’ end. There’s nothing he hasn’t made you question. At times, when you’re tossing and turning in bed and hoping for a way out of that cavern of a mind, you wish time could skip to a year in which the voices no longer haunt you at night; and yet, when you’re here buried in his arms, you would do anything to freeze and relish this fragment in time.
It isn’t right. You two aren’t right and you know it isn’t right… but how do you deny yourself of the cure to those deep scars when he, himself, wishes to be downed?
It takes everything in you to finally drop your hands from his locks to his shoulder. Just as you’re about to deny the tempting elixir, Jin lifts his head along with his gaze that now meets yours, “Y/N, I have something I need to tell you.”
“...y-yeah?”
The windows to his soul twinkle underneath the dim chandeliers above. Those starry dark brown eyes simply take your breath away.
“My dad,” his voice quivers like the water that wells in his eyes; and when you know he’s about to bawl, you pat his head ever-so-endearingly. Gulping, he finds the courage to continue, “he’s sick.”
“Oh... oh, Jin,” you murmur, quickly wiping the few tears that drop onto his flush cheeks before bringing him into another tight embrace. “I’m sorry.”
“I only moved—” and that’s what cracks his buoyant front into a full on bawl “—I only moved to take care of him!”
“I understand.”
He shakes his head, “I didn’t want to abandon you!”
“No, Jin, I know,” your voice is buried underneath his whimpers, “I’m sorry for saying that. I didn’t know. I’m sorry.”
“I didn’t know things would turn out like this!” he cries, holding you even closer. “I didn’t know!”
“It’s okay, Jin. Really, it’s okay. It’ll be okay.”
“No, it won’t be okay,” his voice hitches in the midst of his hiccups, “my father is dying and now I’m walking down the aisle with a woman I don’t even love!”
Your strokes come to a temporary stop because how could fate be so twisted? Who is it to decide whose time shall begin and whose time is up? You have to hold your breath along with the waterworks that sour your eyes. You can’t cry now. He needs your stability.
He needs you.
“Did you…” you take a shaky breath, leaning back to watch him cover the messy state of his face, “did you tell your dad?”
“I-I couldn’t,” he stutters, voice muffled by his voice, “you know how long he’s been waiting for this.”
I know,” you ponder for a second before hesitating to continue, “...why didn’t you consider me?”
“I—” his hiccup interrupts him as he roughly smears his tear-stained cheeks with his palms “—I thought you hated me. I didn’t think you would agree. I thought our promises were just a joke. But when you confessed that night, when you said you would fight for us—” his voice cracks again as he laughs at himself, eyes to the ground “—I thought damn, fuck, how did I mess up so hard? I should have fought for us. I’m so stupid—”
“—no you’re not—”
“—so fucking stupid!”
His self-reprimanding curse echoes in the room. Each of his demeaning scorns inciting a fiery justice in you.
“No,” you state, “you’re not stupid.”
Without the dignity to face you, his hands clenched into fist and he continues with bangs shrouding his sorrowful eyes, “I’m sorry, Y/N. I hurt you—”
“—no, Jin, you did not—”
“—I messed us up—”
“—no, Jin, look at me, hey, look at me,” you place a finger under his chin to lift his spirits until those bloodshot eyes of his find refuge in yours. Smiling, you speak, “see? I’m okay. So what are you apologizing for?”
“Aren’t you… mad?”
“Mad? No, silly,” you laugh, wiping another tear. “Sad? Maybe.”
“See—”
“—sad because I wasn’t there by your side when you needed me… and maybe a bit sad that I won’t be the one holding you like this tomorrow,” you apologize with a soft smile over the latter jab that incites a wince from the boy. “Why didn’t you tell me about your father?”
“I didn’t think it was that serious,” he hiccups, “and when I found out, I tried to call you but it didn’t go through.”
“Shit,” you curse under your breath, “I’m sorry.”
“No,” he takes a deep breath to calm his high, “it’s not your fault.”
“And it’s not yours either,” you affirm, breaking out into a laugh when you take another look at his reddened eyes and dampened cheeks. “Look at you! Why are you looking like a mess on our wedding day, huh?! At least let us be ignorantly happy for one day!”
“What…?” he frowns whilst hastily smearing every last evidence of his breakdown on his face. The result is an equally red, irritated skin across his cheeks. “What’re you talking about? Kim Seokjin never looks like a mess… hey, what’re you laughing at?!”
“Look at your tie, idiot! What kind of a rich son are you if you can’t even tie it correctly? Come over here,” you say just as you grab the end of his necktie to pull him up onto the platform. With his necktie now at your eye-level, you begin to unravel whatever knot he had attempted. All the while, you can feel his gaze as he watches you do your thing, completely enamored. This time, it’s your turn to turn red. To distract yourself from the rising self-consciousness, you clear your throat, “call me whenever you’re going through a hard time, okay? I’ll give you my new number…”
The piece of fabric flails around into equally atrocious knots that Jin had previously created until you groan in frustration and disassemble everything. You had practiced this so many times while he was gone, foolishly believing it would come in handy the day he returned, but why does nothing ever work out the way you want it to?
“I swear it worked last time I tried…”
Your best friend just watches silently, chuckling as you wrap the fabric around your own neck this time; and when he speaks, much steadier like the Jin you have always known, he looks you directly in the eye. “Youngji told me about your guys’ conversation.”
“Huh?” you pause as soon as your embarrassing declaration of love begins reciting itself in your head, but not even the resumed work of your hands could distract you from the ever-growing shade of red. “O-oh, that… what about it?”
“I heard what you said about me.”
“Yeah?” you hum nonchalantly, even though the trembling of your hands and the avoidance of your eyes from his give you away. “Well, did she tell you about all the complaints I made, too? About you being a stupid dork?”
“She did,” he utters before placing a finger below your chin to avert your attention to those dazzling works you desperately avoided, “but would you still be willing to marry this stupid dork?”
“This isn’t even a real wedding,” you feign a frown under the spotlight of his intent gaze, “why are you asking me a question like that?”
“Sorry, I didn’t have the funds to hire a real priest.”
“You don’t need to for a fake wedding.”
“I thought you said we should be ‘ignorantly happy for one day?’”
The bantering just never stops, does it?
“Okay, well… to answer your question,” you mutter, eyes averting to the side, “under normal circumstances…”
“Under normal circumstances…” he repeats.
“Where you aren’t engaged…”
“Where I’m not engaged…”
“And your father approved of me…”
“And my father approved of you…”
“Then yes,” you say without hesitation, eyes returning to find a newfound comfort in his relieved gaze, “yes, I would marry you.”
“And that’s why I love you,” Jin smiles, chuckling softly. “I’ll always want to marry you.”
And just as a nearby clock tower strikes its church bells to signal the stroke of midnight, Jin grabs the end of your necktie and pulls you in to press his lips onto yours. The body of his warmth and the acceptance of an inevitable end to your paths serve as the last page of a book never to be read again; and yet, he holds himself close, refusing to let you go.
But when the end nears and the magic of the bells resume time once again, the two of you pull away to catch your breaths. Forehead against yours, Jin gives you one last, fleeting kiss.
“Happy birthday, Y/N.”
❀ ❀ ❀
Deja vu would be the perfect term to describe this feeling. You can almost see yourself in the room of hundreds, stealing glances at the man from afar. It only takes one blink for you to relive the rollercoaster of jubilance and confessions and tears. In the split second of darkness, the past week flickers before you like a film reel: breaking down in the middle of the hallway right in front of Jin, staring bewilderedly at the large bouquet in the hand of a man at the office, confessing with tears that stain your face and sobs that conquer your voice, meeting the woman who had stolen your spot beside Jin, and holding him in your arms as he cries his heart out at the stroke of midnight.
And just as quickly as the whirlwind of memories had taken you on a trek of time, your eyes flutter open to find yourself in another suffocating room of hundreds once again.
Youngji [8:39 P.M.] Hey Y/N do you think you can visit me real quick?
The glaring text on your phone screen glows in an otherwise dimly lit reception room. Thumb hovering over the screen, your mind goes blank. People pass by you, commotions and laughter fill every corner of the room, and you stand there frozen and affixed to the floor beside the table of food with a glass of red wine in your hands.
“Hey, Y/N,” someone whispers into your ear and you immediately turn your phone off only to find Alex on her tiptoes, “what’s the matter?”
“Oh, um, nothing,” you respond under your breath, “it’s just that someone wants to talk to me.”
“Well, you better hurry then,” she ushers you with a gripping hand on your left arm, “the ceremony is about to start anytime now.”
“O-oh, okay,” you nod, allowing your footsteps to follow the momentum of her push.
This isn’t exactly what you had planned, for the original plan involved your complete avoidance of the groom and bride, but it’s unsurprising that things never quite go your way. Nothing could quite topple you like last night’s revelation anyways. Taking a deep breath, you weave through the audience, wandering about the venue until you finally find yourself in front of a door with a “BRIDE WAITING ROOM” printed in gigantic black letters taped to it.
Hesitantly, you knock, “hello? This is Y/N…? Youngji called for me—”
“—Y/N!” The wooden door swings wide open with a highly distressed Youngji hiding behind it. Before you can reply or even confirm the identity of the woman, her hands clutch yours and pull you into the room with a force unimaginable for a human of her size. Practically lurching forward, a heap of air is knocked from your lungs just as the door slams closed. Coughs force their way through your throat, but Youngji wastes no time to rush to your side. “Y/N, this is an emergency! I need help!”
“W—” you wheeze, peering up at her as you’re doubled over “—what in the world are you talking about?”
“I don’t know,” her hands jitter as she paces back and forth, “I don’t know why I feel so… so nervous!”
“Hold on,” you frown, finally straightening your back, “that’s perfectly normal. It’s your wedding—”
“—please don’t say that word again,” she begins biting her freshly white-coated nails.
“What word? Normal? Wedding? Your—”
“—I can’t believe it’s my wedding…” she says repeatedly, hands flying to her head and disheveling her previously perfectly conditioned curls. She suddenly turns to face you, eyes wider than ever with a look that screams of an epiphany. “I-I don’t think I can go there. Y/N, I don’t think I can go out there!”
“What?!” you almost yell, flabbergasted. Recoiling from your outburst, you start much more softly this time. “Are you sure? I’m sure it’s just your nerves getting to you. You’ve been okay with it for at least a year, right?”
“Why?” her eyes widen to unprecedented diameters as she grabs your arm for support. “Is it because it’s too late? Do you think I should back out, Y/N?”
“What? No, no, no, calm down, follow me,” you shake your head, grasping her hand and guiding her to the chair in the center of the room where an entire photo shoot has been set up. Lowering yourself to a squat, you give her a squeeze as firm as the smile on your lips. “Hey, you’ll be okay. It’s just the jitters. Everyone gets them. I’m sure Jin is freaking out in his room, too.”
“...okay,” she nods, pouting as her eyes lower to your hands that hold hers. Peering up at her from below, you can’t help but notice how beautiful she looks dolled up on this special occasion. From the extravagant poof of her princess gown to the gorgeous glow of the bride herself, you find yourself lost in a trance that burns with heart-panging jealousy. You almost miss her when she murmurs, “how are you so calm, Y/N?”
“Huh?” you raise a brow and laugh. “Why would I be nervous? I’m not the one getting married here.”
“But… your best friend is getting married,” she shifts to get a clearer look of you but finds you with your eyes to the floor, “are you sure you’re okay with that?”
“Of… of course. I’m happy for him,” you say through barely parted lips and stand to your feet before making your way to the door. “It’s not exactly traditional, but do you want me to get Jin? Maybe he can calm you down—”
“—do you know why Jin agreed to this arrangement?”
Freezing in your tracks, you throw a glance over your shoulder to meet her distraught gaze.
“Why are you asking me that now?”
“Because,” she blurts, clearly without thinking as words fail to follow through, “because I want your blessing! I want you to be okay with it!”
“Blessing...?”
“Yes,” she nods. “I can live with marrying a man I don’t love because I know I’ll come around, but I don’t think I can live knowing I’ve broken your relationship with Jin.”
Your weight shifts from your left to your right but the force of burden weighs immeasurably heavier on your very being. There’s nothing that would have prepared you for her request. Preparation, however, proves unnecessary, for your mind runs on its own and the words come to you as if rehearsal is all it's ever done.
“I don’t think I’m in the position to grant you permission. That’s your decision and Jin’s,” you say, “and if my blessing is what you’re asking for, then I can give you it as many times as it takes to convince you. But if you’re asking for me to be okay with it, then I’m sorry. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to give you that.”
Those are your last parting words as you slump on the wall behind you and a heavy sigh is shared between the two women on opposite sides of the door. Head low like a woman unjustly ashamed for speaking her truth, you take a deep breath with those heavy shoulders that carry the weight of a woman who had essentially cursed the joining of two hands. Nevertheless, somehow, you persist to make your way through the halls just as the ceremony begins; but as the audience settles and the light dims, something tells you the guilt that intoxicates your blood would have a longer-lasting aftermath than you had first expected.
“Hey,” Alex leans into you, whispering, “is it just me or does Jin seem really jittery?”
“...no,” you answer, making sure to keep yourself hushed amidst a room of seated spectators. From the second bench to the front, fortunately on the opposite side of where Jin’s parents sit in the front row, you get a clear view of Jin and Youngji in between the black silhouettes of a couple heads; but anyone in the room can tell the bright studio lights and elevated platform don’t help his constantly shuffling case. “I don’t think it’s just you.”
“I see… so both the groom and bride are getting cold feet, huh?”
“Well,” you utter, quipping, “in Jin’s case, he’d probably just say he forgot to sleep with socks on.”
Alex turns to you with sheer confusion across her furrowed brows, “huh?”
But before Alex could inquire further, the priest clears his throat and begins the opening ceremony. The officiality of it all, a long-dreaded image of Jin standing by another woman’s side manifesting into reality, has you subconsciously sent into a frenzy.
“Dear Beloved, we are gathered here today in the presence of these witnesses, to join Kim Seokjin and Heo Youngji in matrimony commended to be honorable among all…”
The clearing of his throat strikes once and hard against your chest. Each word that reverberates in the room echoes the vibrating pain in the blood pumped from a gaping wound. Your chest heaves and heaves and your lungs struggle to maintain composure, and while your breakdown may have gone unseen by the rest of the universe, you know for sure only two would catch sight of your state.
You and him.
“...if there is any person who can show cause why they should not be joined together…”
The priest continues and the tension in the audience rises by the second of a stress-inducing prompt, but the moment Jin catches your eyes and the panic painted across it, his every attention remains on you. Guilt should’ve painted your expression now, having stolen the groom’s admiration from the rightful bride by his side, but all you can do is relish in a fleeting moment you deem the least this cruel world owed you.
Maybe he feels the same way, because something catches in your throat like the hunch that has chills running down the nape of your neck. You don’t dare move an inch. You fear any movement would give you away, though you’re sure he already knew the second he met you halfway.
His eyes, those dazzling eyes that could single-handedly freeze any moment in time, they ask you for a permission only he could grant.
“...let them speak now or forever hold their peace.”
No one speaks but the thick air that engulfs every witness in the room is telling enough. Holding a shared, bated breath, everyone awaits and prays for the quick passing of this deafening silence. Your heart is pounding so hard you worry your passing out would be the one interruption to the ceremony, if not anything else. It takes everything in you to remain hidden, glued to the chair. You can hear every single movement in this room, the squeaking of a nearly retired bench, the rustling of clothes amidst a fidgeting audience, the anxious tapping of someone’s heels against the wooden floor, yet no one dares to speak now.
The priest sighs a soft breath of relief.
Everyone but you follows along.
The priest clears his throat and pro—
“—I would like to speak.”
A loud gasp travels across the room. Every witness, including the priest himself, stares at the young man, wide-eyed. The knot in your throat inhibits you from following suit, but the hammer against your chest works harder than ever; because there he is, your best friend, standing boldly before the audience with a puffed chest and a tightened fist that brace for the repercussions.
It all happens so suddenly, so swiftly. The strings that were left raveled now unraveled, the paths that were abandoned now explored, and the love of a lifetime whomst once bid you farewell now holds on with a determination that tells you they aren’t quite ready to let go, by happenstance or by conviction, everything falls into place.
You had reprimanded yourself relentlessly for envisioning a moment like this and you truly believed this would be the worst case scenario, so why is it that only now, as your peering eyes are enamored by the sparkles in his, you find yourself smiling proudly and thinking to yourself… that’s your man.
“Father, mother,” Jin turns to face his parents in the front row, declaring loudly and firmly, “I don’t want to marry someone I don’t love.”
“What,” Alex shrills under her breath as she clutches your hands, “what is going on, Y/N?!”
Her voice doesn’t reach you and neither do her cold, nudging hands. The ongoing commotion around the room are like white noise in your background. You can’t even spare a second of your attention to the picturesque vision before you, the man who fights not for you but for the two of you.
Jin bows, head hanging low to his parents and the audience, “I’m sorry for saying this too late.”
Everybody watches as his mother attempts to hold her husband in place. All is in vein, however, when one look of the baffled expression on her husband’s face conveys enough to everyone of the mayhem that is soon to ensue. He rips her grip apart from his arm and storms to his feet, pointing a finger at his apologetic son.
“W—” he struggles to find his breath “—what are you saying? You said you were okay with this just last week!”
“I did,” Jin affirms with his head still hanging low, “I thought I was okay with it until this week.”
“How—”
“—honey…” the mother murmurs.
“No, changing your mind is one thing, but changing it at the very last second is another,” his father shakes his head, yanking his hand and stumbling on his feet before his distraught son could lend a helping hand. “Did I teach you to inconvenience others like this? Do you know how much trouble you’re causing Youngji and her family?”
“I do,” he says. “I’m sorry.”
His father grunts, “don’t you see, Seokjin? ‘Sorry’ can’t fix everything—”
“—actually, Mr. Kim, it’s not just Jin,” Youngji bounces to Jin’s side then pivots to bow to her parents who sit in the row before you, “I, too, don’t want to marry anyone until I really know them.”
Physically, the spotlight remains affixed to the stage. Mentally, it feels as though everyone’s attention is gradually creeping its way toward you. It takes everything in you and the grip of Alex’s hands not to run from the prying eyes.
“What?” their parents gasp. “Didn’t you say you were okay with it if it were Jin?”
“I did!” she insists, suddenly retracting. “I did, until…”
“I’m sorry,” Jin lifts his head to turn to Youngji’s parents before bowing once again, “this is all my fault.”
“No, no, you wouldn’t do this... tell me, son,” his father takes a step toward the stage, beckoning for an explanation, “tell me who did this to you?”
Jin lifts his head, brow furrowing and lips thinning as he chooses to remain silent to his father’s question. Suddenly, it’s everyone’s duty to catch the perpetrator. The audience begins craning their neck every which way to skim over the possible candidates. Your heart sends threatening waves of pain that foreshadow the inevitable chaos you’re about to be dragged into.
You can barely move from staring at the floor in between the groom and bride but you can spot the gradual direction of his mother’s eyes making its way toward you… and when they finally spot you, a lightbulb flashing across her eyes the second you make the lethal mistake of meeting her gaze for the first time in many years, it’s as though her son’s rebellion is the only thing that makes sense in this universe.
Only naturally, his father catches onto his partner’s maternal instincts along with the rest of the crowd as their diverged attention converges, one head turning after another, to stare you down—some with awe plastered across their jealous front, some with ghastly colors than drain their face of blood.
“Is that… you, Y/N?” his father’s voice echoes in the room. “Seokjin, don’t tell me…”
“No, father!” Jin jumps in, holding up a defensive pair of hands as he attempts to quell the fiery in his father’s temper. Wide-eyed and panicked, he glances between you and his father. “It isn’t her fault. I swear. I”ll explain—”
“—don’t tell me you’re going through all this trouble for a childish crush from five years ago?”
A loud shriek began the chaos the second Jin’s father exploded, lurching forward with a vexing fist. Everyone in the front rows jump to their feet to hold him back, whereas people in the back rows stand to their tiptoes to get a better view of the climactic show, which includes a once-to-be-groom insisting his father punishes him and a once-to-be-bride slapping her ex-partner in the head for his submission.
People are hysterically laughing, crying, screaming, yelling, fighting, but you sit there, frozen and petrified, until a hand shakes your entire being to your feet.
“Y/N, Y/N, God damn it Y/N, earth to Y/N!” Alex raises her hand, just about to give you one hard slap to the cheek when you suddenly flinch awake. She then hastily pushes you toward the door in the corner of the room whilst everyone is too distracted to notice your discreet escape. She looks you directly in the eye, “you need to run before things get too crazy. I’ll handle things here for now.”
“But Alex, I’m at fault here—”
“—yes, I mean, maybe,” she corrects herself with the shake of her head, “but you being here doesn’t help matters. I’ll help Jin and Youngji.”
“But—”
“—now go,” she starts your momentum with an encouraging push, “go!”
Nodding, you begin your long trek of the night. You run and you run and you run. Your mind runs blank but your feet run a mind of its own. You sprint down the dimly lit streets, you pay no mind to the traffic lights of endlessly empty streets, and your hair twirls in the wind that impedes your speed down the hills. Your surroundings become a blur as your arms swing desperately, your chest heaves incessantly, your eyes sting with tears, and your lips spill anguished sounds of incoherency until somehow, under the sway of the town’s cold spring air and your flux of emotions, you find yourself in a familiar street of your greatest dreams.
Depleted of gas, your feet stumble into a trot that has your knee nearly buckling, which then turns into a jog that then drifts into an untroubled walk in which your lungs try to catch up and your mind is scrambling at a hundred miles per hour but you, yourself, have gone elsewhere.
The luminescence of the full moon is blinding but all the more soothing as you navigate your way through this street you’ve walked one too many times before. For some reason, perhaps out of habit or a hope for something waiting at the end of the tunnel, you begin to count each passing light post. Seven fluorescent lights, you count, seven lights resembling the rays of moonlight until you finally reach your old acquaintance of many years at the corner of the street.
Leaning your head back to stare at the familiar white text on a green sign post, you smile at the homely sight.
CHERRY BLOSSOM AVE
A comforting breeze blows by you, the branches above you rustle in the wind, and the cherry petals from your old pal flutter into the air to envelop you in a solace you had long sought but failed to obtain. It’s like the calm after a storm. Not quite disconnected from the string that loops around your fourth finger to those of another man’s—no, you couldn’t unravel it after all this heartache—but at least away from the prying eyes that could tear you apart and away from the people who whispered gossip of matters they had none in.
Hours seem to pass in the clouds that retire to reveal patches of new twinkling ornaments. You would have believed it if someone were to tell you all control of time lies within the blink of your eyes. The silence was calming initially; but the longer you stand here and the more the numbness begins to fade, the more you become aware of your lonesome circumstances.
The silence is deafening. It knows your greatest fears and your innermost thoughts. You can’t handle it. You can’t bear the thought of being left alone to that voice in your head.
You have to go.
Where?
You don’t know. You just know you have to go somewhere. You can envision all the places you can run to but all the roads lead you to one destination. Yes, anywhere would be fine, anywhere that leads you to him.
“This marks the second time you’ve ever been so enraptured by something other than me.”
Whirling around, seconds seem to become milliseconds and gravity becomes a law unbeknownst to earth, for you can’t believe the sight your eyes lay upon. There he is, standing by the tree just a few meters away with a loosened necktie and disheveled hair, almost as if a pitiful albeit wondrous mirage crafted by your shoddy prayers to the moon above.
“Hey dummy,” he simply utters, taking a step or two toward you before poking your forehead, “what? Why’re you staring at me like I’m a ghost?”
“What?” you manage to say under your breath. “I’m not staring…”
“I was just joking, you know?” he chuckles. “I wouldn’t be jealous over a street post. Psh, I’m not that dumb—”
“—why…” you frown when he quirks a brow, “why are you here? How are you here?”
“Oh no, she’s gone crazy,” Jin laughs at the stupefied look you give him. “At least an hour or two has passed since you left. Somehow, I managed to sit my father down and explain myself.”
“And… what did he say?” your hands begin fidgeting. “He must hate me, doesn’t he…”
“I wouldn’t say ‘hate,’ per se… he’s perfectly okay with you. In fact, he likes you, really. He’s just mad at how things happened. After he calmed down, though, he understood where I was coming from.”
Cautiously, you peek at those eyes that peer down at yours, “and your mother…?”
“She said she saw it coming from a mile away. Apparently she saw us arguing at the engagement party and knew right away,” Jin purses his lips. “Psh, yeah, as if I’m that easy to read.”
Allowing yourself the smallest of laughs, you still can’t seem to rid yourself of that panging guilt. “And… what about Youngji?”
Jin stares intently at your expression before cracking a smile and chuckling, ruffling your hair, “don’t go crying on me now, Y/N. Don’t worry about it. I’ll take care of everything.”
“But I just,” your voice cracks, “I just hate myself for ruining everything for everyone—”
“—hey,” he cups his fingers underneath your chin to lift your gaze to his, “you did not ruin anything for anyone. I did this. I chose to fight for us.”
Hesitantly, you nod and he smiles in response.
“Youngji’s still explaining to her family right now. She told me to find you and Alex told me you would probably here.”
Frowning, you mutter to yourself, “how did she know…?”
“Well,” Jin drops his hand from your chin to raise them in the air, “we did promise to swear our wedding vows here, didn’t we?”
“So what?” you deadpan. “You’re gonna marry me now after all this mess?”
“I know you really want to marry me as soon as possible, but I think I’m gonna have to take a break from weddings for now.”
Rolling your eyes, you mumble, “ditto.”
“But hey, I may have already broken the third promise,” one corner of his lips curve into an apologetic smile before he shrugs, “but that doesn’t mean I can’t marry you in the future! Plus, I may or may not have promised my father I would marry you in the near future to make up for it, so...”
Scoffing, you gawk, “and who said I would marry you?”
“Who wouldn’t marry me?!”
The two of you stare at each other in silence, but the mirrored grin that stretches across your lips are undeniable. Soon enough, a loud fit of giggles and cackles fill the air. It happens all too quickly. The banters come to you like second nature, the conversation flows like a river through time, and somehow you find yourself lying beside him on the blazer he had laid out on the grassy hill and star-gazing for hours on end.
It’s almost like you’ve seen this all before, just five years aged.
“So,” Jin speaks, “how’s your birthday been?”
“Oh, shut the hell up.”
“What?” he cackles, getting up to lean on his arm whilst hovering you. “You know it’s not too late to tell me what you want for your birthday!”
“I already told you,” you narrow your eyes at him, “I wasn’t joking when I said what I said.”
Jin smiles, “in that case…”
He leans in to diminish the distance between his lips and yours. A lulling zephyr blows gently on the cherry petals as you close your eyes and you can picture the way they gracefully descend upon the two lovers below. Having witnessed the unforeseeable promises from start to finish, it’s almost as though an old accomplice was applauding a long-awaited finale.
And when he finally pulls away, eyelids fluttering open just as yours do, he speaks, “happy birthday.”
“What was that for?” you giggle.
Jin’s mouth falls agape, “I’m giving you what you wanted for your birthday!”
“Well,” you purse your lips, “where’s my ring to confirm it then?”
“After all this time, do you really need a ring at this point to confirm my love for you?” Jin rolls his eyes. “You know I’ll always want to be by your side, married or not.”
A fit of laughs escape you as your hand reaches up to squeeze his cheeks, “I know, I know. I’m just joking.”
“Well, good, cause I’m bankrupt at the moment,” Jin sighs, plopping back onto the grass beside you. A momentary silence passes before he turns his head to look at you, “just to make sure, you said you wanted love, right?”
Turning to meet those sparkles in his gaze, you answer, “yeah?”
“You said you wanted to feel love, right?”
Your grin grows wider by the second, “yeah?”
“Well,” he says, “do you feel it?”
“I do,” you answer. “What about you? Do you feel it?”
The vows hold a truth much closer to his heart this time around, and he smiles as he swears...
“I do, too.”
#bts scenarios#jin scenarios#bts angst#bts fluff#jin angst#jin fluff#jin x reader#jin x you#seokjin x reader#seokjin x you#bts x reader#bts x you#bts x y/n#jin x y/n#seokjin angst#seokjin fluff#bts au#bts imagines#jin imagines#seokjin scenarios#bts fic#seokjin fic#bts fanfic#seokjin fanfic#jin fanfic#bts oneshot#bangtan fanfic#bangtan fluff#bangtan angst#bangtan jin
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Morning In Bed (Naga x Reader)
Pairing: Trans Male!Reader/Male!Naga
Genre: Fantasy, Domestic, Fluff,
Warnings: 18+ Content up ahead! Impregnation, Oviposition, slight Breeding Kink,
Word Count: 1549 words
Summary: You spend another relaxing morning bed with your husband, with a couple of (welcome) surprises along the way
Request: Hey! I'd love to see something nsfw between a naga and a trans male reader. Could you write about the reader getting impregnated, and/or the actual egg laying process if that's not too much.
When you first built your house with your husband, Venthr, he had two requests:
One, for your bedroom to have a wall facing the West, right next to the side of your California King Mattress. Two, that there be a large window on that same wall, to allow the morning rays to heat up your bed and act like a giant sun lamp when you both wake up. You had agreed readily, because even though you loved cuddling with your husband, his cold-blood always had you layering on pajama pants and cozy socks, prepared for a cold compress pressed to your side the whole night.
The sun feels especially nice this morning, with Venthr’s tail wrapped around your legs, shoving away the warmth of your duvet and focusing solely on feeling up your lower half. You crack one eye open as Venthr lays hot kisses on your neck, his claws slightly grazing your hip as he massages it from behind.
“Well, look who's become a morning person.” Your murmur, face still half shoved into a pillow. From the corner of your eye you can see Venthr smile, his long fangs peeking out from between his lips, which he then wets with a long swipe of his tongue.
“It’s pretty easy with you pressed up next to me.” Venthr whispers, pressing another steaming kiss to your neck, his tail slightly constricting as his chilled piercings send goosebumps across your neck. You giggle as Venthr nips at a particularly sensitive spot, reaching your hand back to tangle in his messy red hair. It hangs loose from his scrunchie, long strands framing his face and falling over his shoulders.
Venthr cuddles even closer to your body, soaking up your body heat and nudging your backside with his-
“Speaking of morning.” You wiggle your eyebrows, Venthr chuckling and rolling his eyes. He’s acting pretty smarmy for a man whose dick is pressed right up against your ass. “What, is my drool that irresistible?”
“Would it be weird or romantic if I said yes?”
“Depends on your tone of voice, I suppose.”
You contort your shoulders so you can kiss Venthr on the lips, a breathy sigh escaping you as he begins to slowly rut against your backside. His cock, unsheathed, lays hot on your low back, the tip of his tail rubbing your ankles as he leans deeper into the kiss.
In between fervent kisses, Venthr whispers, “Do you want to try this morning?”
You nod, Venthr’s affection stirring a tingling current up your body and down into your toes as he grinds even harder.
“Y-yeah, yeah I would.”
Venthr doesn’t bother responding with a snarky remark, not about how easily you become putty his hand or how maybe the both of you are now morning people; He just trails his long claws up your hips and your stomach, crawling under your pajama t-shirt and pulling it up as he goes.
The two of you had been considering having a child and had only recently started trying for one; Or, with his biology, a couple. While you two had no problems being ‘motivated’, so to speak, it had been more difficult for his eggs to take to your human biology. His cum would usually leak out of you without any of his eggs properly latching inside. The process was a little messy, but nothing some high grade bleach and plenty of sheets couldn’t handle.
You sigh as Venthr returns to his passionate sucking on your neck, his claws flicking over your nipples as he slowly spreads your legs with his tail. The smooth muscles massage your lower body as the contort and force you open, his cock finding it’s place in between your thighs.
“Gods, I love those noises you make baby.” Venthr all but groans into your ear, fingers finding purchase on your chest and twisting your nipples. You shove your face into your pillow, somehow still embarrassed by your own grunts and moans as your husband fondles you. Venthr’s chuckle vibrates against your neck as his left hand leaves your chest and moves towards your bedside cabinet. He hastily pulls open a drawer and takes out the lube, spreading it over his fingers for you to see. “I’ll get you prepped, but from what I can feel down here,” he punctuates with a hump against you, rubbing his slick cock against your juices, “I don’t think you’ll need much.”
You playfully hit his shoulder, but your muscles tingle from the pleasure and make the impact a love-tap at best. Venthr laughs again, relishing in your sounds of pleasure as he slowly walks his hand down your body. The cold lube smearing against your navel sending goosebumps all over your body.
“Y-you’re wasting t-the expensive kind, babe.”
“All for you, sweet cheeks.”
Venthr’s long fingers finally reach your crotch, spreading you open and playing with your sensitive spot before inserting two of his fingers. Your breath catches in your throat and Venthr takes the opportunity to smother you in a french kiss, fingers increasing their pace. You can taste the metal of his tongue piercing, gasping around his own moans as he finds that particular spot within you. The callouses of his palms put perfect pressure on your insides, the bottom of his palm spaying special attention to your crotch.
You feel the familiar climbing sensation of an orgasm ripple through your abdomen after a couple minutes, causing you to pat Venthr’s arm and breathily whine his name. Venthr pulls his fingers out of you with an audible slick.
“You think you’re ready? Ready to take me, all of me?”
You nod against Venthr’s neck, mind in a pleasured haze, tugging on his tail to bring his cock even closer. Venthr kisses your pulse point. “Alright, just let me know if you need to stop, okay?”
Venthr’s tail slowly shifts apart your legs even farther, the tick of his cock brushing against your entrance as he adjusts his upper half. His hand, now covered in your cum and some lube, lovingly brushes against your abdomen. With a final kiss, Venthr begins to slowly insert himself into you.
You hold your breath as Venthr’s swollen cock fills you out, the cold base of scales bumping against your backside as he bottoms out. A rumbling moan comes from his chest when he feels the way you clench around him. Venthr continues to massage your hips and begins to increase his pace once he feels your muscles relaxing. The two of you let out a series of low grunts and sighs as the tip of his dick pressures against that sensitive spot inside you. Venthr shoves his face in the crook of your shoulder, whispering a ‘fuck’ as a trail of drool begins to pool out of his mouth.
“You’re going to be-” Grunt ‘-such a good fucking dad.” Ungh “I can’t wait to see you, filled to the brim, petting your stomach.” Aah “Chaperoning those dorky school trips, going to overpriced amusement parks.” Fuck.
With your husband’s cock pounding you into oblivion, you barely have the mental capacity to comment on his dirty talk, your responses limited to slurred ‘uh-huh’s and yelps. Venthr’s tail struggles to keep their grip on your sweaty legs, desperately wrapping tighter and tighter as your bed begins to shake with the power of his thrusts. The bedsprings squeal as he grabs the top of the headboard, holding up his upper body so he can fuck you even harder. Your fingers clench around the bed sheets, knuckles white while Venthr’s movements become sloppier and sloppier, the returning feeling of climax bubbling up in your core.
“You’re gonna look so handsome with my eggs inside you, baby. I know it, fuck!” You throw your right calf around Venthr’s tail, pushing him even deeper inside of you as your pleasure climbs to higher and higher heights, moving your own hips in tandem with your husbands. Both your moan’s raise in pitch, your bed frame slamming against the wall with cacophonous bangs. Venthr’s sharp nails comb through your hair as presses a sloppy kiss to your forehead, more of his saliva dripping from his mouth and onto your face.“Fuck, fuck! I’m cumming, I’m cumming baby, I’m gonna-”
Your orgasm rocks your body, aftershocks shaking your very bones as Venthr’s thick, gelatinous sperm fills you up. The globes of unfertilized eggs push past your cervix and send another wave of trembling shivers down your spine, forcing your eyes to roll into the back of your head.
The two of you stay in that final position for a couple of seconds, Venthr’s dick pushing and holding his eggs inside you as your eyes slowly come back into focus. Venthr’s heart beats quickly, the vibrations pulsing against your back as his tail muscles stay constricted around your legs, holding them in your breeding position. But once the endorphins run out and your muscles begin to ache, the two of you collapse into a sweaty, cuddly pile.
The silence lingers even as your reason returns from post-sex euphoria, Venthr absentmindedly petting your rib cage and caressing your thighs.
“You know, I think my dirty talk made all the difference.”
You smack Venthr’s hand, playful and weak. Venthr laughs.
Just another morning in bed with your husband.
#monster romance#monster x reader#monster/human#monster/reader#my writing#naga#naga x reader#trans male reader#reader insert
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Marlene’s little brother has a thing for Sirius, because who doesn't have a thing for Sirius? Marlene is freaking out, and everyone thinks it's just hilarious. Remus would've thought it was hilarious too, had Marlene’s little brother not been very close in age, cute, witty, and oh so bloody charming.
Somewhat longer fic that will be added to my Crush Confessions Series! 3756 words, so not that long. Wolfstar Fluff, of course😎
Muggle Charms
James Potter’s garden party is the event of the summer. Everyone gets together at the Potter estate for a day of listening to music, swimming in the lake (yes, there’s a lake on the grounds of the Potter estate), and playing friendly Quidditch matches. Mrs Potter walks around with all sorts of delicious foods, James and Sirius fly their brooms above the lake and make bets who dares to jump off from the greatest height, Mary and Emmeline are sunbathing and make bets who will need to be healed first.
It had started the summer after first year with just the four Marauders, but every year, their number has grown, and this year is the largest group thus far.
Marlene McKinnon is last to arrive, and, as usual, her arrival doesn’t go unnoticed.
“Everyone, come meet my little brother!” She shouts across the field.
The McKinnons have four children. Marlene’s mother and two of her siblings are Muggles, while the rest have magical abilities. Marlene’s sister is the oldest of the siblings. She’s a Muggle who works as a primary school teacher. Despite growing up with a father who’s a wizard, she has always felt slightly uncomfortable around magic, but she loves her family fiercely and is very protective over her younger siblings. As she’s much older than Marlene, she has always been more like a second mother.
Next comes Marlene’s older brother, who’s wizard, but has finished Hogwarts long ago. He now works in the Sales Department for a company that develops novel potions against levitation- and portkey-sickness. According to Marlene he’s a serious businessman by day, and a giant goofball by night.
Last is Marlene’s younger brother. He’s a Muggle, but where Marlene’s sister likes to pretend magic doesn’t exist, he thinks it mighty fascinating. He and Marlene are incredibly close, writing each other constantly and hanging out as often as they can when Marlene was home from Hogwarts. She has never brought him to James’ garden party, though. He works in the Food Service Industry, and the bright summer days on which James plans his parties are the days on which he most likely has to work. This year, however, he had managed to get the day off.
The first thing Remus thinks is that the McKinnons have good genes. He can’t really tell which of the two siblings is older, which means they must be very close in age. The boy has the same thick, blond hair and bright blue eyes as Marlene, as well as the same freckles from the sun. He’s short for a guy, barely taller than Marlene, but he’s quite muscular, with broad shoulders. All in all, Marlene’s younger brother is a very cute guy.
“Everyone, this is Miles!” Marlene says, when everyone has gathered around. “Let’s see... Here we have James Potter, he’s the host.”
Miles grins at James. “Some house you’ve got here, mate. Thanks for having me!”
James grins back and lifts his beer. “Cheers, mate!”
“James is Lily’s boyfriend,” Marlene says. “You’ve already met Lily-” Miles gives Lily a warm smile “-and of course you know Dorcas.”
“Hullo Dorky.”
“Hiya Miley.”
“And here we have my other girls, Alice Fortescue, Mary McDonald and Emmeline Vance.” Marlene points each of the girls out, and Miles gives them all a friendly nod.
“And these two are the Prewetts, Fabian and Gideon- don’t worry about who’s who, none of us actually knows.”
“Oi!”
“And this is Caradoc Dearborn, and this Benjy Fenwick, so miraculously you’re not the shortest guy here.”
“Marlene!”
“And here we have the rest of the renegades, Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew and Sirius Black.”
The chance in Miles is instant.
The polite smile he was wearing turns into a coy smile, as he gives Sirius a not-so-subtle once-over, though Remus doesn’t think it was ever meant to be subtle. Miles takes a step forward towards Sirius. “Well, hello there.”
Remus can’t blame him. He would’ve reacted the same had he been in Miles’ position (alright, maybe he would’ve turned into a blushing, stuttering mess and forget his own name if he were suddenly faced with a guy like Sirius, instead of step forward with an enticing smile and flirtatious greeting, but that’s beside the point). Sirius looks bloody amazing. His swimming trunks are clinging to his legs, and his damp hair is hanging over his bare chest, with little droplets dripping down his muscular body.
Sirius grins knowingly at Miles. “Hi.”
Marlene’s head whirls around from Miles to Sirius to Miles and back to Sirius, so fast Remus worries she might get a whiplash.
“No,” she says. “No, nope, uh-uh, absolutely not. Not. Happening. No.”
She steps between her brother and Sirius, facing the latter, and jabbing a finger against his chest. “You are not going to try anything on my little brother, got it?”
Sirius holds up his hands and takes a step back. “I only said hi.”
Marlene looks at him suspiciously, like she suspects Sirius saying hi is some sort of secret seduction technique (which would actually explain a lot).
“C’mon Marls.” Miles moves to stand next to his sister, and throws an arm over her shoulder. He winks at Sirius. “We all just want to have a good time, don’t we?”
Marlene’s face is getting more red by the second. Her fingers are clutching her cardboard plate, causing it to rumple. She’s clenching her jaw, while intently staring at the pair a bit further on the field.
“I can’t bloody believe it,” she hisses. “If Black thinks I’ll let him hook up with my little brother, he has another thing coming!”
Miles had managed to catch Sirius when he went to grab a drink, and they have been chatting apart from the rest of the group for about half an hour now, to Marlene’s great distress, and everyone else’s amusement. Well, everyone else except for Remus, but he thinks he’s been hiding it quite well.
Remus doesn’t know how the guy does it, but Miles somehow manages to stand closer and closer to Sirius. He’s looking up at him through his lashes, with those big blue eyes and that damned smile, sometimes even going as far as to bite his lip. Sirius has definitely been blushing at some point!
While Remus is the only one who can emphasize with Marlene’s distress over the situation, he really doesn’t like how she’s blaming it all on Sirius, while evidently its her brother who’s acting like a little minx.
“Honestly, Marlene,” Lily says, shaking her head. “Didn’t you talk to Miles about there being an incredibly hot, single gay guy present?”
Remus agrees. Marlene should’ve known what would happen when she decided to introduce her brother to Sirius! You cannot bring him here knowing Sirius is looking like he does, and expect him not to react!
Marlene huffs indignantly. “My little brother is a precious angel who’s not interested in such a thing as ‘hot, single men’!”
Lily looks at Miles and Sirius. Miles seems to be laughing at something Sirius said, and touches his upper arm while doing so, letting his hand slide down Sirius’ bicep. Lily turns her head back to Marlene and raises her eyebrow.
Marlene just folds her arms over her chest and pointedly looks away.
Later, when Miles reaches up to brush a strand of hair from Sirius’ face, Marlene’s face has taken on a more purple colour. By this time, she has started angrily chewing on her cardboard plate.
Luckily, everyone’s too busy making fun of Marlene to notice Remus looks like he’s going to be sick.
Normally, a day at the Potter estate flies by, but Remus is positive this day lasts at least three times as long. But Remus has been getting through it. He hopes that after today, he won’t see Miles McKinnon of ever again. Well, he mostly hopes Sirius won’t see Miles McKinnon ever again, he can admit that . To himself, that is.
Currently, he’s sitting down with James, having a butterbeer. Just when he thinks he might make it through these last hours without further additions to his misery, Marlene comes striding their way, Dorcas on her heels.
“Potter,” she says, stopping in front of them and placing her fists on her hips. “You’ve got something I need, and I want it now!”
“Sorry McKinnon,” James says with a smirk. “I’m a one woman man.”
“In your dreams, you wanker,” Marlene snaps. “You’ve got an Invisibility Cloak, no?”
James takes off his glasses and starts polishing them with his robes. “I may or may not possess such a thing.”
Marlene rolls her eyes. “After seven years of going to school with you, I think I can safely say that you do. Well, I need you to use it. Miles asked Black to take him on a tour around the lake.” She scrunches up her nose. “And you have to follow them so you can report back to me whether Black has kept his paws off of my little brother!”
“More the other way around,” Remus mutters, but Marlene hears and glares at him.
“My sweet and innocent little brother would never do such a thing! He simply... wants to see the surroundings and needs Black for directions.”
Dorcas throws her head back and cackles loudly. “The only directions your ‘sweet and innocent little brother’ is interested in, is the fastest way to get into Sirius Black’s pants!”
Marlene directs a deadly glare at her.
Just when Remus thinks at least Dorcas knows what she’s talking about, she continues. “C’mon Marls, Miles can make his own decisions. Let the boys have some fun!”
Let the boys have some fun? That’s not a good idea! That’s the opposite of a good idea! That’s a terrible idea!
“Well,” Remus says, managing to sound surprisingly calm. “We’re on Mr and Mrs Potter’s property, and Miles has only just been introduced to the gang. I mean, he and Sirius barely know each other. I’d say it’d be rather inappropriate if something happens between them here and now. You don’t want Marlene’s brother to give off the wrong impression.”
James sighs. “What if I lend you the Invisibility Cloak, and you can follow them yourself?”
“Oh, no!” Marlene holds up her hands and takes a step back. “There are certain things I don’t ever want to see my little brother do, or hear my little brother say. If I were to... accidentally stumble upon them, I’d either have to Obliviate myself, or be scarred for life.”
Remus snorts. Not so sure about her brother being so innocent after all, is she?
“Well, Padfoot’s my brother!” James argues.
“Remember when I put in a good word for you with Lily, and finally got her to agree to go on a date with you?” Marlene plays her final card, and effectively.
“Fine!” James puts down his butterbeer and gets up. “Remus, let’s go.”
“What? Me? Why?”
“Because you got me into this, Mr ‘it’d be inappropriate’. And besides, I’ll feel like some perverted Peeping Tom spying on them alone.”
“So better to have two Peeping Toms?” Remus argues, but he knows it’s an argument he’s not going to win.
That’s how Remus finds himself in the place he wants to be least of all, crouched down under the Invisibility Cloak with James, and, after casting a quick Silencio over their footsteps, following on Sirius and Miles on their ‘casual, totally not romantic, definitely not a date’ stroll.
“-and once I’ve gained enough experience, I’d like to come back to London and open my own restaurant!” Miles finishes.
“That’s amazing, Miles!” Sirius exclaims. “I’ll definitely frequent!”
“As long as you don’t expect any free food just because you’re so handsome,” Miles teases.
Sirius gasps in pretend-shock. “I would never use my looks for such purposes!”
“Right,” Miles chuckles. “You be careful, Sirius Black. A face like yours is a powerful weapon.”
“Wow,” James whispers admiringly. “He’s good!”
Remus grits his teeth. Of bloody course Miles McKinnon is all charming and smooth, chatting Sirius up.
“What about you?” Miles asks. “What are your plans for the future, now that you’re some kind of strong and powerful wizard?”
“I’m starting my Healer training soon!” Sirius beams, and Remus can’t help but smile at the pride in his voice.
“That’s... like a doctor, right?” Miles asks.
“Yeah,” Sirius replies. “But without the cutting people open.” He shudders. “Definitely no cutting people open.”
“Oi!” Miles protests, bumping his shoulder against Sirius. “Doctors cut people open to save lives, you know. They don’t do it for a laugh.”
“I’m sorry!” Sirius quickly says. “I didn’t mean to offend. It’s actually very impressive what Muggle doctors can do without magic, and the things they’ve come up with! I’m sorry.”
“Hey, it’s alright,” Miles says, glancing at Sirius. “Don’t worry about it.”
Sirius smiles sheepishly. “Sorry. It’s just... I was raised in this really conservative pureblood Wizarding family. I’m always afraid I’ll say something Muggle-phobic without realising.”
“It’s okay, it wasn’t that bad, honestly.”
“Good,” Sirius says, relieved. “I’m just... trying to be better.”
Miles smiles softly at him. “Just the fact that you’re trying already makes you better.”
They walk in comfortable silence for a moment, until Miles speaks again. “That must’ve been hard though, growing up in a family like that. Marlene already mentioned you’re living here now. Is that why?”
Sirius nods. “I ran away from home the summer before. Best decision I’ve ever made.” There’s a tightness in his voice, though, and an emotion in his eyes that makes Remus want to run towards him and pull him into a hug.
“I’m sorry you had to go through that,” Miles says sincerely. Then he gives Sirius a teasing smile. “Though I must say, it’s a good look on you, the whole ‘sexy rebel’-thing.”
Sirius barks a laugh, and the pained expression slides off his face. “Well, I’m glad my issues at least fit my anaesthetic!”
Remus doesn’t know whether he wants to bless Miles McKinnon for being able to turn Sirius’ mood around and make him smile, or whether he wants to curse Miles McKinnon for being able to turn Sirius’ mood around and make him smile.
“I bet you love provoking your family, don’t you?” Miles asks.
“That might just be my most favourite pastime,” Sirius replies sincerely.
Suddenly, Miles stops walking, so Sirius stops as well and turns back to face him.
Miles takes a step towards him. “I bet it would really provoke your family if you were to make out with a boy, a Muggle boy at that.”
Sirius swallows and his face slightly flushes. “That... That’ll definitely do the trick, yeah.”
Miles comes even closer, now almost standing chest-to-chest with Sirius, and he tilts his head up and leans in.
James still looks mighty impressed with Miles’ flirting tactics, while Remus wonders if the sound of his heart shattering might give them away.
Suddenly, Sirius steps back. “Wait, stop. I... I can’t.”
Miles looks disappointed, but not too shocked. “Why not?” He asks. Then he jabs his finger against Sirius’ chest, much like his sister did earlier. “And I swear to god, Sirius Black, if it’s because I’m a Muggle you can stick that wand of yours up your-”
“No, no, no!” Sirius quickly says, whilst letting out a breathless laugh. “It’s not you, really, it’s me.”
Miles gives Sirius a stern look, while placing his fists on his hips, making Remus wonder whether they’re sure Marlene and Miles aren’t twins. “If you’re gonna give me that lame excuse, at least elaborate what it is about ‘not me, but you’ that makes you reject me. I mean, I’m not proposing a marriage here!”
Sirius sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “There’s... someone else. I mean, there’s not really, I don’t have someone else, but I have feelings for someone else. So therefore this-” He gestures between himself and Miles. “Just doesn’t feel right.”
Remus exchanges a look with James, who looks just as stunned as he is by this information.
Miles, though, just folds his arms over his chest and looks at Sirius thoughtfully for a moment. “So, Lupin then?”
Remus freezes. What? Him? Oh no. He’s not sure he can bear to hear Sirius’ denial. ‘Lupin? Remus? No, of course not! What in Godric’s name gave you that idea? Why the hell would I fancy Remus?’
However, Sirius just sighs and looks down at his shoes. “I’m that obvious, huh?”
Remus stares dumbfounded. It’s... true? He feels an eruption of butterflies in his stomach. Well, he always feels some butterflies when he sees Sirius, but now it’s like all those butterflies had babies, and those babies had babies again, creating an immense flutter.
“Nah,” Miles says. “If I had known for sure, I wouldn’t have made a move. I only had a suspicion, but I decided to take a chance anyway. I’m not too surprised by this turn of events, though.”
“It’s really the only reason,” Sirius says. “Because you’re bloody great, you know that? You’re gonna make some guy really happy one day. Anyone would be lucky to have you.”
Miles groans. “ ‘Its not you, it’s me’, ‘anyone would be lucky to have you’. Shall we go before you start telling me we can still be friends?”
Sirius grins. “Normally I’d suggest we at least pretend to have had a good snog, just to see if Marlene’s face can get any more purple, but I don’t want to give Remus the wrong impression. Not that he’d care,” he adds with a mutter.
Miles stops walking again. “What? Are you seri- No, Marlene warned me not to say that. Really?”
Sirius just blinks at him.
Miles shakes his head. “I mean, you asked if you were being obvious, well, you were nothing compared to Lupin. Although, that could just be me. I couldn’t help but notice when he’s looking at me like he wants me to catch fire every time I come near you. Wait. You wizards can actually do that, can’t you?”
Remus huffs. He wouldn’t have actually set Miles on fire! At least he doesn’t think so.
Sirius frowns at Miles. “You must be mistaken. Remus is nothing but pure kindness! He always makes everyone feel welcome! You can’t help but like Remus!”
A warm feeling spreads through Remus’ chest.
Miles just looks at Sirius, shaking his head. “You’re actually in love, aren’t you?”
Sirius blushes and looks away.
“Well,” Miles says. “You should tell him how you feel. He clearly feels the same. Then you can both stop this pining.”
James, who just had to process the shock of one of his best friends fancying another one of his best friends, now has to process the shock of his best friends fancying each other. He’s staring at Remus, and consequently trips over a rock. He does manage to catch is balance, but he lets out a loud yelp.
Miles stares at the empty spot behind them on the path, surprised, but Sirius’ eyes narrow in suspicion. He lifts his wand, and the next moment a gush of wind blows the Invisibility Cloak off of Remus and James.
To his credit, Miles recovers pretty quickly from seeing two people appear seemingly out of nowhere, including the person they were just talking about. He blinks a couple of times, then says “I suppose this works as well.”
Remus and Sirius are just staring at each other.
“Uhm...” James says. “I was sent here by miss McKinnon to escort the younger McKinnon back to the estate.” Because apparently awkward situations make him talk like he’s an eighteen century nobleman. “Off we go, young lad.”
Miles doesn’t protest when James grabs his arm and starts dragging him away, but he does turn around to give Sirius a thumbs up.
“We were sent here by McKinnon,” Remus quickly says, when he and Sirius are alone. “She wanted to know if anything would happen between you and her brother.” Remus takes a deep breath. “And maybe I wanted to know if anything would happen between you and him myself as well,” he says softly.
“Were you jealous?” Sirius asks. It sounds curious, not angry, judgemental or smug, just curious.
Still, Remus can’t help but pout, and he looks away. “Of course I was jealous. Bloody Miles McKinnon, with his big blue eyes, batting those ridiculously long eyelashes at you, and being all cute, and witty, and charming.”
“You know, if you want Miles to snog you instead, you should hurry and you can probably still catch him,” Sirius says irritably.
“No!” Remus quickly says. “No. I just mean, I wish it was me. When he calls you handsome, when he brushes your hair away from your face, when he leans in to kiss you... I wish it was me doing those things.”
“Why don’t you?” Sirius whispers, staring at Remus intently.
“Because!” Remus says desperately. “Because I know how to be your friend, but if I even think about flirting with you, I turn into an awkward, rambling mess.”
The only thing that can possibly be going through Sirius’ mind right now is how the hell he let the sexy, confident, flirtatious boy walk away, to be stuck with the flustered heap of awkwardness that is Remus Lupin.
Remus stares down at his shoes. “I mean, I like you a lot, and also because I feel comfortable around you, I do, but when it comes to flirting, I suddenly get scared that you’ll laugh at me or something. I even think it’d be easier if you weren’t my friend, if we didn’t know each other so well. Then maybe I could-”
Remus stops talking when Sirius gently cups his cheek and tilts his head up. Slowly, ever so slowly, he leans in, giving Remus enough time to pull away had he wanted to. Which, for the record, he absolutely doesn’t. Sirius presses their lips together. And it’s...
Well, it’s not awkward at all.
It’s fireworks, and symphonies, and the sun breaking through the clouds. It’s a sense of belonging, and knowing all is right with the world, and a feeling of coming home.
Both boys are a little out of breath when they pull back, more because of the intense emotions than because the kiss had been that passionate.
“See?” Sirius smiles at Remus. “If I want you to stop rambling, I can always just... interrupt.”
“Rude,” Remus mutters, before pulling Sirius back into another kiss.
#my tumblr writing#crush confessions#wolfstar#wolfstar fanfiction#wolfstar fic#marauders#marauders fanfiction#marauders fic#sirius black#remus lupin#remus x sirius#james potter#marlene mckinnon#wolfstar fluff
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TASM!Peter Parker x Reader: I Made a Playlist
NO SPOILERS FOR NWH! I gottchu fam that hasn't seen it yet.
Hello! I have kinda disappeared off the face of the planet for a while. Um, so yeah. Not cool, I know. I think I'm Viking more with the little one shots instead of the consecutive story fanfics just cause they take less time. I'm trying to use some of my writing as a stress-relieving activity and series are not very stress-relieving. SO I'm just gonna write one shots or imagines or whatever you guys want. Give me requests! The less I have to be creative, the better lol
Gender: neutral! No pronouns used!
Description: Peter and you share a bus ride on the way to work every day and listen to music. Peter makes a special playlist for you to help him confess his feelings.
"I stayed up all night making a playlist for you!" Peter says as he sits down next to you on the bus.
"Why?" You give him a look. You're used to his "staying up all night" stories, but "to make a playlist" is a new one. "You should be sleeping-"
"Yeah I know but you mentioned that you were tired of listening to the same songs over and over."
You think to yourself. You remember when you told him that. Last week at some point. You didn't think he'd even heard you. "Alright, let's hear it."
He gives you one of his dorky smiles. When you first met him, you weren't sure what to make of him. He wasn't anti-social, but he was picked on. You would always see Peter on your way to lunch, his skateboard under his arm and a camera in his hand.
Peter hands you one of the earbuds and you put it in, careful not to let it go too far. You always feel bad using his earbuds, worried that you'll somehow break them.
The first song that starts playing is "Paper Rings" by Taylor Swift.
"I thought you hated Taylor Swift?" You say.
He shrugs. "Eh, she's not so bad I guess."
~Peter's POV~
He knows you like Taylor Swift, so he put about ten of her songs on the playlist.
His heart pounded so loudly it sent his spidey-senses in a whirl. Every little movement from the passengers around him made him jump.
Peter tried to focus on you. That's why he stayed up all night making a playlist. To tell you that he likes you without . . . telling you? At least he thought it was a good plan at one in the morning. Now, however, he thinks it was a stupid idea. How would you even get the hint?
Peter jumps at the feeling of something touching his arm.
"You okay?" You ask.
"Yeah yeah," Peter stares at you. Did you say something and he completely missed it?
"Okay . . . can I see your phone?" You say slowly.
"Oh sure," Peter shoves the device into your hand, nearly sending it flying.
"Uh-huh," you give him a questioning look. He focuses intently on the OSCORP badge on your collar to avoid your eyes.
A passenger drops a bag. Peter's arm lurches out toward you to protect you. You widen your eyes at him.
"Sorry," he mutters. He wrings his hands tightly together and closes his eyes to hopefully relax.
"I thought you hated most of these artists." You break his concentration.
"Oh, um . . . yeah, well, no, um, I mean, I'm not . . . answering that?"
"Okay, why are you so stressed? You're acting . . . weird. What aren't you telling me?"
"I can't just . . . say it!" Peter's words protest against his tongue. He actually could just say it, probably, if he wasn't . . . him and you weren't . . . you.
You sigh and your face shifts as you lose yourself in your thoughts. Your eyes are on the ground, giving Peter a chance to take in your face. He has so few chances as most of the time is spent avoiding your gaze at all costs.
"Do you wanna-" c'mon Peter, just do it. "Do you want to . . . I don't know. Wanna . . . sometime, I don't - or we could do something . . . else?"
"Yeah, okay." You give him a smile.
"Really?" He yells. You shush him as people start looking over.
"Send me a link to that playlist, I like it."
Peter watches as you stand to leave. You give him one last smile and exit at the OSCORP stop.
Thank you so much for reading! Please like, comment, and reblog. DO NOT COPY MY WORK, I will be on the lookout and I do know the actions to take should my creative entity be infringed upon.
Disclaimer: Character (Peter) and Location (OSCORP) belong to Marvel and other respective copyright owners. All dialogue, actions, plot, other characters, etc is my creative work.
Buy me a coffee?
#peter parker x reader#marvel#avengers#the amazing spider man#tasm 2#tasm#tasm!peter parker#x reader#no way home#no spoilers#fluff#cute#confession
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Hello there may I request the Dimitrescu daughters celebrating their s/o birthday, it’s my birthday today☺️
Happy belated birthday, anon!!! Wishing you many more happy (and hopefully less chaotic) years to come! Under read more for length.
Bela + Birthday
On one hand, she wants to be the first thing you see when you wake up. On the other hand, she’s got a million things planned, and no matter how much help she enlists, she’s bound to end up running late. So maybe she’s not the first thing you see, but she’s crawling into your bed before you have a chance to fully wake up. Wrapping her arms around you, murmuring ‘good morning’ and ‘I love you’ into your ears. Sleepy kisses all around<3
Will stay with you for as long as you want, but will ‘subtly’ encourage you to get up eventually, after all she’s spent the past month planning this day. It’s possible that she’ll end up slowly sliding out of bed, an inch a minute, saying ‘no more kisses until you get up’.
Once you’re out of bed, it’s time for a decadent breakfast. A whole buffet table filled with your favorites (the ones appropriate for this time of day, at least), with any servants you’re friends with being allowed to join in. If you’re not from Romania, Bela will go out of her way to have the cooks learn recipes from whatever country you grew up in. Might throw in a few non-breakfast items too. Mmmm, thinking about my family’s krumkake recipe now, so good<3
What happens next depends a lot on your specific personality. If you enjoy parties and social gatherings, there will be festivities in one of the castle’s larger rooms, again with any of your friends being allowed to join (even visitors from the village, should you wish to invite them). A large cake will be served, likely baked by none other than Ava Caldwell (please excuse my shameless OC mention).
If you’re more introverted, or shy, Bela will keep the gathering very small, likely just her family and you. There will be music, a few gifts from the family, similar but smaller treats. Less energetic, more casual and comfy family time.
Come lunch time, the two of you will have some private time again. Depending on weather/season, she’ll either take you for a picnic in the garden, or a quiet meal in the observatory. Think candles, lots of strategically placed flowers, warm blankets… all that cheesy stuff. Afterwards, she’ll let you take the reins for a bit. Essentially, you’ll spend some quality time doing your favorite hobbies together. Feel free to info dump/rant all you want, Bela will stare at you with love in her eyes regardless of the subject.
Once you’ve had your fun together, it’ll be time for dinner, which will once more be with her family. Everyone will be on their best behavior (under threat of blackmail, except for Alcina, who’s just, you know, a good mother who wants her daughter to be happy). Again the cooks will go all out for the meal, making whatever dishes weren’t appropriate for breakfast. There will probably be leftovers- unless, of course, you decide to let the other servants enjoy what you cannot finish.
Finally, before bed, Bela will let you open the gifts from her. The two of you will be in either her room or her private study, away from everyone else. She’ll have prepared 3 gifts for you. One will relate to your personal interests (a hobby, a movie/book series you love, etc), one will be something the two of you can do together, and the last will be something you can wear/keep on you to remind you of her (not that you could ever forget, really).
I’ll leave the detail of what happens that night to your imagination, dear reader, so as to not assume anything about *ahem* attractions, gender, or any possible… deviances (kinks, if that wasn’t clear). Regardless, there is cuddling<3
Cassandra + Birthday
Wakes you up, first thing in the morning, with kisses. Just crawls into bed with you and smothers you in somewhat sleepy affection. Do you know how hard it was for her to get up at this hour? Relatively! Which is why you’re not allowed to get up get up, at least not for a while. Mandatory girlfriend snuggles. No escape. If the two of you are, ya know, of the persuasion to do certain things… without clothing… then yeah, that’s probably also happening. Please don’t judge me, I’m tired (and asexual) and am trying to avoid this being unnecessarily ns/fw.
Doesn’t really want to share you at all, even on your birthday, but will let you mingle with friends/have a nice group breakfast if that’s what you want. Just expect to be sitting in her lap for as long as she can get you to, alright? Might tone it down if her family is around (okay, well, if her mother is around). Will pretend to judge people for whatever gifts they get you unless you specifically ask her to stop. Repeatedly whispers things in your ears to distract you, ranging from the audaciously inappropriate to “my gift is going to be so much better than that” to very sweet “I love you”s.
Lets you plan as much or as little as you want for your special day, though won’t hesitate to suggest things if you struggle to come up with stuff/can’t decide. Again, she’d prefer to spend as much of the day with you as possible, and would prefer your gatherings be very small. Like, maybe just the two of you. Going on a hike to your favorite spot, or painting together (even if you don’t know what you’re doing, because she’ll get nice and close to help ;) ), or just curling up with her somewhere cozy.
Whatever you end up doing for the day, she’ll probably have a servant pack you guys some lunches, so you don’t have to interrupt whatever you’re doing.
Dinner will be… a surprise. Planning is not her area of expertise, so Cassandra will enlist the help of her older sister, resulting in a romantic meal that, well, at least has hints of your girlfriend’s personality in it. Yes, she picked out the color of the napkins. Yes, the flowers she had asked for turned out to be poisonous, so yes they did have to swap them out last minute. Oops, you darn humans and your ‘mortal weaknesses’. Honestly, the display is very touching. She asked for help to do something nice for you<3
At the end of the night, she’ll take you to her art studio, where there’s a big painting that’s been covered up for a few days or so. She’ll pull the sheet off, oddly shy, and you’ll see it’s a lovely portrait of the two of you… except you’ll be wearing a necklace that you’ve never seen before. Which Cassandra will quickly pull out of her pocket, to give you as the second part of your gift :D
Cue a night of cuddling (and possibly other activities… such as sleeping).
Daniela + Birthday
Might as well bodyslam you first thing in the morning, honestly. She’s very excited, and loves you very much, and just wants to have some nice morning cuddling (and kissing). Solution? Make sure that she spends the previous night in the same bed as you. Seriously, it’ll save you a fair amount of pain.
Has the least planned of the three, despite having the most ideas, mostly because she struggles to actually organize things. Expect to spend however long you want in bed, just relaxing, probably still with lots of kisses and cheesy dialogue about how much she loves you. When you get up, however, the two of you will be surprised to see that Daniela’s family decided to help her get shit together.
There will be a nice breakfast, with your friends present, and Bela might even delay her own meal just to play some music for you. Afterwards, the family will give you their gifts. They won’t make you open them yet if you decide to save it for later, though, so no worries.
Then, you and Daniela will be encouraged to go out and have some fun. Which means a nice almost-picnic in the gardens, with less of a meal, more of some sweets/snackies. Cue more cuddling, and dorky poetry reading. The poetry will always start out serious… but by the end you’ll both be trying to find the lamest, cheesiest poems you can get, reading them to each other in increasingly ridiculous voices. Somehow you’ll end up reciting dirty limericks. Eventually you realize that Daniela isn’t even going through her books to find them, and is actually making them up as she goes. You’re not sure you want to know how she gained this skill.
Eventually you’ll head back inside, for lunch. At this point, there will be more music, some optional dancing, with a surprising amount of servants being allowed to just enjoy themselves. If parties aren’t your thing, Daniela will be more than willing to sneak you off somewhere more… private. For various reasons, you know. Doesn’t have to be anything more than cuddling. But this is Daniela we’re talking about, so…
The evening will mostly be up to you, with Daniela wanting to do whatever you want to do, even if it’s not something she’d normally enjoy. She just wants you to be happy<3
Dinner will be romantic, like with Cassandra, if admittedly far more chaotic. Still, it’s very lovely, and she’ll probably get adorably flustered as she tries to make things perfect for you. Expect her to get you multiple smaller gifts, and repeatedly mention that she wasn’t sure what to get you, so she kinda just… got everything. It might be best to reassure her that you mostly care about spending time with her. But, you know, also tell her you enjoy the gifts because she really did panic about them.
#bela dimitrescu x reader#cassandra x reader#cassandra dimitrescu x reader#daniela dimitrescu x reader#bela dimitrescu#daniela dimitrescu#cassandra dimitrescu
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Eve, I LOVE binging your masterlist. I was wondering if I could request a short lil story where someone reminds Jules that since Remus + Sirius got married, then Sirius and Reg are his brothers now too and Jules gets really excited about having TWO more older brothers after Coops' wedding? If not, totally fine!! Have a great year!!
Part 2 of the Coops Wedding series! It’s finally here after my computer was possessed and deleted the first version--this one is just over 4k words, so I hope that makes up for the delay! Sweater Weather credit goes to @lumosinlove <3
Preparations II Part 1
Remus had never been much of a dancer—despite his speed on the ice, he had two left feet and only the barest hint of rhythm. However, dancing at his wedding was a different story.
Sirius twirled him in a small circle, smiling from ear-to-ear as their friends and family spun around them to the beat blasting through the speakers. They still had three hours until sunset, and Remus was planning on spending every second of it with Sirius’ hand in his own. He pulled him in for another kiss—our tenth today? Twentieth? One hundredth? Who cares—and pulled away with a laugh as Jules and Katie bumped into the backs of his thighs.
“Watch it!” he called, ruffling Jules’ hair as they passed in a dramatic tango. Katie shrieked with giggles as Dumo swept her into his arms, spinning her around with a broad smile. Hope took Jules’ hands while Phil Collins began to sing about love, happiness, and everything Remus was already holding in his arms.
“Hey!” Sirius said over the music, giving Remus a squeeze.
“What?”
“I love you!”
“I hope so!” Remus laughed, spinning Sirius under his arm before reeling him in to bump their noses. “Not bad for a wedding we planned in six weeks, eh?”
Sirius shook his head, grinning. “We were engaged for ten months. How did we put that off for so long?”
“Because we’re busy all the fucking time.”
“We’re not going to be busy for three whole months,” Sirius said giddily as he picked Remus up a few inches with ease. He paused for a moment, scanning his face as if he was trying to memorize it.
“What’re you thinking about?” The were close enough that Remus hardly had to raise his voice above a murmur.
“We get to do this every day for the rest of our lives.”
His words hit Remus like a semitruck of affection and tears prickled his eyes as he leaned down for a kiss; Sirius set him down to kiss him properly, hands gently bracketing his jaw. “You are the most incredible person,” Remus said against his lips. “How the hell did I get so lucky?”
“I could ask you the same.” Sirius smiled and rested their foreheads together. “Come on, I think Celeste wants to cut the cake soon.”
Remus looked over at the folding table on the other side of the dance floor and stifled a laugh; Celeste, in her pretty blue party dress, was adjusting the cake by millimeters and glanced at her watch every few seconds, as if she was afraid people were going to leave. “I’m dying to know what she eventually decided on for the flavors.”
Sirius hummed his agreement and pulled Remus along by the hand—they didn’t even have to say anything before the rest of the small crowd followed them and gathered around the table. “Wait, wait, wait!” Celeste gasped, taking her phone out of Dumo’s pocket. After a few seconds of quiet, she nodded and centered it on them. “D’accord.”
“Ready?” Remus set his hand on top of Sirius’ and the hilt of the knife, pushing slowly down as it cut through the white frosting in a smooth glide. It was perfectly baked; not a single crumb stuck to the blade as they pulled it out.
“Here we go,” Sirius muttered as they took the first piece out. “Vanilla!”
“Orange, actually,” Celeste said, beaming. “The next layer is chocolate.”
“Celeste.” Remus gave her a tight hug before passing her along to Sirius, who bent down so she could kiss his cheek.
“Merci, maman,” he said quietly. “C’est parfait.”
“Surprise!” She did little jazz hands before handing them two forks from the end of the table. “Oh, this is so exciting. You have to try it, I don’t know if it’s good. I’ve never made an orange cake before.”
“Hurry up, Cap, we’re hungry!” Logan called from the back of the crowd. Sirius pulled a face at him and carefully slid the piece onto a paper plate before linking his elbow with Remus’.
Remus took a forkful of the cake and held it to Sirius’ mouth—just as he went to eat it, Remus scooted it to the side. “Ope, a little to the left, love.”
“Remus.”
“Oh, you almost had it! Not quite that far.” He could hear Jules giggling and grinned, moving it two inches to the right as Sirius tried to get it a third time.
“Remus!”
“What? It’s not my fault you can’t catch a fork!”
Sirius finally grabbed his elbow and held it in place to get the cake into his mouth, narrowing his eyes at Remus. “Only you would be mean to me on our wedding day.”
“I’m not being mean.” Remus kissed his nose. “Just keeping things interesting.”
“Yeah, yeah, alright.” Sirius got his own bit of cake and held it up. “Close your eyes, sweetheart.”
The second his eyes shut he regretted his decision, but before he could shout a full paper plate of cake smacked into his face with a splat. Everyone gasped, then burst out laughing as the plate fell back down onto the table. Remus slowly wiped frosting from his eyes, flicking it down onto the grass. “That was mean.”
“That was payback,” Sirius corrected.
“See, I would believe you, except I know you’ve been planning to do that for at least three days.”
“Honestly, I’m surprised you didn’t do it first,”
“C’mere, you.” Remus reached half-blindly for his tie, pulling him in for a sugary kiss and feeling around with his other hand for the plate. He pulled away and, before Sirius could open his eyes, smushed the leftover cake right onto his forehead.
Sirius licked his lips. “Celeste, the cake is fantastic. Do you think it’ll moisturize?”
She was laughing too hard to respond, but she blew him a kiss in between drying her eyes. Remus took a napkin of his own and wiped his face off, licking as much of it off his hands as he could. “Oh, please don’t wait for us to clean up,” he said, motioning the still-laughing crowd forward. “We’ll be here for a while.”
“Whose fault is that?” Sirius teased.
“Yours!”
They ended up ducking into the kitchen to wash up while Dumo and Celeste passed out slices of cake. “I hope there will be some left over for us,” Sirius said as Remus washed the crumbly frosting from his hair. “From the little I got, it was amazing.”
“Yeah, she nailed the orange flavor.” Remus leaned on the front of the sink, watching people mill around or return to the dance floor for one more song before enjoying their cake. The buzz of their mingled voices dripped with joy and he smiled to himself, soaking in the feeling of his family’s happiness.
Warm arms encircled his waist as Sirius’ chin rested on his shoulder. They said nothing and waited in utter silence until Remus laced their fingers together and headed back out into the summer sunshine.
----------------------------
An hour later, a dozen mismatched plates of food laid decimated on the folding table with a quarter of a wedding cake left as James headed toward the dance floor alone, clutching a piece of paper. He stopped just in front of Remus and Sirius’ table and winked at them.
“Hey, everyone. If you don’t know me, which I find difficult to believe for a number of reasons, I’m James Potter, the groom’s best friend. Yes, both of them.” He paused for a moment to let the laughter roll through. “However, I didn’t want a fight to break out over who got to have me as their best man—”
“There was no fight,” Remus corrected with a grin. “The loser got you, Pots.”
“And a lucky loser he is,” James shot back playfully before clearing his throat. “I met Sirius Black six and a half years ago, when he was eighteen and awkward. We were both awkward, actually, but he had this uncanny ability to make it look cool while I tripped over my own feet.
“The minute I met Sirius, I knew we were going to be friends. He was quiet, a little shy, and didn’t really know how talk to people. In that way, we were exactly alike.” The laughter was even louder that time and Sirius shook his head. “Ah, who am I kidding. I adopted Sirius as my best friend because I thought it would be hilarious to corrupt him.”
James glanced down at Sirius with a smile. “While I attempted to make an extrovert out of him, I learned several important things: number one, he is the least extroverted person I’ve ever met. Two, he is one of the kindest, funniest people on the planet. And three, my life had been severely lacking without him in it.”
A soft ‘aww’ washed over the group and Remus ran his thumb over Sirius’ knuckles.
James looked back at the other tables as he continued. “Sirius Black is known to most of the world as one of the best hockey players of our time. To me, he’s the dorky little brother I never had, and I am so, so proud of him. I’ve had the privilege of watching him open up, not only to me, but to everyone else on the team that he loves with that big soft heart. When my son was born—you all know my son, right? I think I have a picture here somewhere—”
“No!” half the group shouted as James grinned.
“Just making sure you’re still awake. Anyway, when my son was born, naming Sirius godfather was literally the easiest thing I’ve ever done. I kinda sat back went ‘hmm, who is the first person I can think of to entrust with my child’s life?’ and the only natural decision was the one who is terrified of children.”
“Terrified is a bit of a strong word,” Sirius complained, though his eyes were shining.
“My bad, you’re petrified by children,” James corrected. “But in all seriousness—sorry, couldn’t resist—in all seriousness, I couldn’t think of anyone better suited to the job. I think that tells you everything you need to know about Sirius, actually. Even when he’s scared to death, he goes out of his way to help people when they need it.
“Sirius, however happy you are right now—and you’re basically glowing—I need you to know that it’s one tenth of how happy you have made the people you love.” James’ voice got a little tight and Sirius took an unsteady breath. “You are a natural leader and a great hockey player, but most importantly, you are an outstanding friend. You deserve every good thing coming your way, today and for the rest of your life. As your best man and your best friend, I’ll be there whenever you call.”
Sirius sniffled as James wiped his cheeks dry and turned to Remus. “Loops, take care of my little brother, alright?”
“You got it, Pots,” Remus said, barely above a whisper.
James nodded, then raised his glass of champagne. “To Sirius and Remus, and all the happiness they deserve.”
A loud cry of “cheers!” went up, followed by thunderous applause as Sirius got up and wrapped James in a full-body hug, nearly knocking them both over. They separated after a moment and James stood on his toes to kiss the top of Sirius’ head before they went back to their respective places.
“You okay?” Remus murmured, linking their hands together again.
“Fuck, I knew he was going to make me cry.” Sirius shook his head with a smile and sniffled once again. “Yeah, I’m alright.”
Lily raised an eyebrow as she stood James’ place. “Y’know, Re, I seem to recall you promising me a microphone if I did this.”
“Sorry to disappoint!” Remus called back, feeling a flutter of nerves in his stomach. Lily had refused to share any of her speech with him; when he tried to sneakily grab it once, she shoved it down her shirt and glared until he left the room.
“I’ll get over it.” She rubbed her fingers along the edge of her paper and sighed. “I’ve written and rewritten this speech about a dozen times since Re asked me to do it, but just being here—” She took a moment and blinked back tears. “It’s different. Just ignore me if I cry, okay?
Lily cleared her throat and turned back to the paper. “I met Remus Lupin six and a half years ago, on the same day James met Sirius for the first time. Personally, I think we should make that day a national holiday, since it irrevocably changed the course of both our lives. James found his best friend and little brother, and I found my Remus.
“One of the first things you will notice when you meet Remus is that he is friend shaped.” Several murmurs of agreement rippled through the crowd and Lily winked at Remus as he flushed pink. “Told you so. Honestly, Remus is one of those people who just exudes kindness. When I found out I was pregnant, he was the first person I told besides James. I knew Remus would not only keep my secret, but also be there in whatever capacity I needed because he cares. Truly, madly, deeply.”
Lily looked over to them with a soft, fond expression that made Remus’ stomach twist into knots. “In Sirius’ vows, he said you were sunshine through dark clouds, which is quite possibly my favorite descriptor of all time. It’s really sappy and cute, for one thing, but also true. Re, you bring light and warmth wherever you go. As someone who has been on the receiving end of that light, I can tell you that it is absolutely overwhelming in the best way. There are few places I feel safer than around you.
“And now we’re here, where you just married the love of your life.” The first tear slid down Lily’s cheek, dipping into her dimple as Remus’ own tracked down his chin. “God, Re, this is incredible. You two get to be together for the rest of your lives, and the rest of us have the best seat in the house to one of the greatest love stories of this century! I mean, c’mon, how many people can say they’ve made it through everything you did?”
Lily sniffled and raised her glass, though she maintained eye contact with him the whole time. “To Remus and Sirius, who remind us all what it looks like to be in love, even when the whole world tries to stand against you.”
A second ‘cheers’ began, but Remus was already on his feet and crashing into Lily, pulling her close as she clutched the back of his suit jacket. “I love you, Lils,” he choked out. “That was fucking incredible.”
“Love you too, Re.” She pulled back and carefully smudged her hands under her eyes to keep her makeup intact. “Ugh, sorry if I ruined your jacket with the waterworks.”
“You’re in good company.” She kissed each of his cheeks and fluffed the front of his hair up, making them both laugh as she took her seat again and Remus moved past his table with a last look to Sirius.
His mother’s eyes grew shiny with unshed tears as he held his hand out and guided her to the dance floor, where they swayed back and forth as Here Comes the Sun started to play, gentle and smooth. “Oh, you,” Hope managed as the lyrics began and Remus twirled her slowly. “I bet your father’s crying even though he’s not dancing.”
Remus glanced over to their table—as always, she was right. “He is. God, you’re good.”
“That’s what happens when you’ve been married for twenty-seven years,” she said, eyes crinkling. “Someday, that’s going to be you.”
He huffed softly. Don’t cry on mom, don’t cry on mom, don’t cry on mom. “You can’t just say stuff like that. It’s like kicking me while I’m down!”
“Little darlin’, it seems like years since it’s been clear,” she sang with a grin, tapping his nose. “Here comes the sun, dodododo, here comes the sun, and I say…”
“It’s all right,” Remus finished under his breath. The dance was over in an instant and after a thousand years at the same time—all too soon, people were clapping as they made their way back to the tables and Sirius walked over to Celeste.
She covered her mouth with her hands as he offered an arm, then nodded and accompanied him to the dance floor. He whispered something and she laughed, looping her arms around his neck with a bit of a stretch as a French song Remus had never heard came through the speakers and softened their smiles.
They talked quietly as they danced; Celeste was as elegant as ever and Sirius could be quite graceful when he put his mind to it. She traced his cheekbones with her thumbs and he closed his eyes, looking utterly at peace. Remus’ heartstrings tugged at the sight and he rested his chin on his hand, letting the waltz roll over him.
More applause followed their dance as Celeste held him in a tight embrace until a more upbeat song began and couples mobbed the dance floor. Sirius downed half his water in one gulp before sitting down with a heavy sigh, and dropped his forehead onto Remus’ shoulder. “You looked good out there,” Remus said, running a hand through his hair.
“So did you. I can’t feel my feet anymore.”
“I think we’re supposed to dance at our wedding.”
“I’m so hungry.”
Remus groaned; between the endless congratulations and conversations after the ceremony, they had no time to enjoy the assorted dishes people brought. “Same. We should go somewhere after this.”
“Other than home?”
“Home…” Remus trailed his lips to Sirius’ ear. “Is for other plans. Food happens elsewhere.”
“Good plan,” Sirius said, a little breathless as he sat back up and stood with a stretch. “Come on, sweetheart, the dance floor awaits.”
---------------------------
Thirty minutes after the sun set and Adele’s perfect fairy lights lit up the backyard, the party finally started winding down. Finn had fallen asleep with his head on Leo’s shoulder about ten minutes prior, but nobody had the heart to wake him; as the best dancer of the group, he had been a hot commodity for anyone looking to show off in addition to whirling both his boyfriends around.
Jules stumbled over to Remus and curled up in his lap without warning, snuggling his face into his chest with a jaw-cracking yawn. Regulus came up behind them a moment later, resting his hands on Sirius’ shoulders and scaring the daylights out of him. “Jesus f—frick, Reg!” he yelped, holding a hand over his heart.
“Sorry.” He didn’t look very apologetic as he turned to Remus. “Jules has been asking for you.”
“Oh, yeah?” Remus looked down and brushed the soft bangs from his eyes. “What’s up, buddy?”
“I love you,” Jules mumbled. “You got married. That’s so cool.”
Remus smiled. “It really is. Thanks for being the ring-bearer, by the way. You did a great job.”
Jules made a muffled noise before wrapping his arms around Remus’ waist with a sigh. “Mmkay. G’night.”
“You can’t fall asleep yet!” Remus tickled his side lightly. “We’re almost done, I promise.”
“What time is it?” Jules cracked an eye open and fumbled for his wrist, turning Remus’ hand over to check. “It’s not even ten! Why am I tired?”
“You’ve had a busy day. Do you know where mom and dad are?”
“Still talking.”
Remus surveyed the crowd and quickly spotted them next to the cubs, sipping water and sharing a piece of cake. He stood carefully, making sure Jules was steady on his hip before heading toward the table with Sirius and Regulus in tow. “We’ve got a tired munchkin,” he whispered when they arrived, depositing Jules into the chair next to his mother; within moments, Jules laid his head on the table.
“Love you, Re,” he said as he tucked his arms under his head. “Best big brother.”
“Best of all three?” Logan gasped in mock-surprise.
“Three?” Jules sat up straight and gave him a confused look. It was made extra adorable by the crooked cowlick decorating the whole right side of his head. “I only have one.”
“Now that Remus and Sirius are married, you’ve got two more big brothers,” Logan reminded him. “Regulus and Sirius count.”
“That’s crazy,” Jules yawned, cocking his head at the brothers. “Re is still my favorite, but you’re awesome and I love you, too.”
Regulus made a soft sound and Sirius kissed the top of Jules’ head. “Don’t tell anyone, but you’re my favorite Lupin,” he stage-whispered, laughing as Remus rolled his eyes.
Jules frowned. “You married one of us, and it sure wasn’t me.”
“Alright, second favorite,” Sirius conceded with a grin as the rest of the table laughed.
“Mama, I’m tired.” Jules traced the bead patterns on Hope’s dress.
“Okay, lovey, we can go home soon.” She raised an eyebrow at Remus and he nodded. “Do you want to say some goodbyes first?”
“We’ll see everyone tomorrow. ‘s okay.”
Lyall gathered Jules into his arms, then turned to Remus and pulled him close with a kiss to his forehead. “So proud of you, kiddo.” He looked over at Sirius for a moment. “Take good care of him, eh?”
“Sir, yes sir.” Sirius pressed a kiss to Remus’ temple as they separated, then moved aside for Hope.
She scanned his face for a moment, then touched their foreheads together. “Good luck, baby. Not that you need it, but you deserve it anyway.”
Remus pulled them both back in for a family hug, feeling Jules drape a drowsy arm around the back of his neck. “Thank you so much for being here. It means—it means everything to me.”
“Wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Lyall whispered. “Now go, you two haven’t eaten anything tonight.”
“Thank you,” both of them breathed at the same time, sending the whole group into a fit of laughter.
They said a few more ‘thank you’s and goodbyes until the other Lions started a loud, incoherent cheer and all but chased them toward Sirius’ car, where a small ‘Just Married’ sign had been stuck on the back window. They were planning on keeping the wedding a secret from the media as long as they could—the reaction would be even more hilarious the longer they waited.
“What if—” Remus broke off into snickering as they pulled out of the Dumais’ driveway. “What if nobody notices?”
“What? That we’re married?” Sirius gave him a disbelieving look. “People are going to figure it out so fast, no matter how many times Pots changes the subject.”
Remus hummed and rested his hand on Sirius’ thigh as he drove, tapping along to the rhythm of the radio; the route was familiar to them both, even after the chaos of the day. A slow, unstoppable smile made his cheeks hurt. “We got married.”
“Damn right, we did.”
“Scuse me for a moment.” Remus rolled down his window and cleared his throat, then leaned out and whooped loud enough that people in the next state would probably be able to hear it. He calmly closed it once more, fighting down a smile. “Sorry, I just had to get that out.”
Sirius slowed and rolled his own window down, sticking his head out into the empty night air. “I got married!” he shouted at the top of his lungs with a wild grin. “I have a husband now! Just thought you should know!”
“Husband,” Remus mused as the car started moving again. “Hmm. I like the sound of that.”
“Me, too.”
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