10,000 Leagues Under Fontaine

Synopsis: The life of a guard of the Fortress of Meropide is mostly dull and structured, until a chance encounter with an otherworldly beast gives you a reason to smile again.

Foul Legacy x Reader Pronouns: Gender Neutral (no pronouns mentioned) Genre: Angst Warnings: Mentions of drowning, acid, burning, very slight mentions of blood

~ * ~ The Fortress of Meropide is always cold. Cold, but never quiet; the underwater complex is unmistakably alive despite being made of metal sheets and grates, the sound of machinery weaving with the chatter of both inmates and guards, sharing their days and gossiping here and there as good citizens of Fontaine always do- rumors spread fast in the Fortress, and there’s not a moment that isn’t exciting or entertaining in some way. Or so you like to imagine. Being one of the top guards of Meropide has its benefits- getting to choose your days off, occasional trips to the surface, even the Duke’s personal trust in your abilities. But with trust comes difficult, often tedious tasks, ones that Administrator Wriothesley only assigns to the most capable workers, and so you find yourself patrolling the space between the main prison and the ocean gates. The room is an odd mixture of metal and screws and a gradual incline towards the sea floor, a shallow puddle transitioning into a passage filled with water that someone could swim in. You keep wondering when Wriothesley will properly fix the gate at the end, and he simply responds that he’ll get around to it at some point. For now, keep watch- it’s almost a straight shot to the ocean, and we wouldn’t want inmates attempting to escape, now would we? And you just nodded, expression steady as stone and twice as unmoving; no prisoners would sneak in on your watch.

Not that they often do. Life at the Fortress is a new start for many and even a step up in comfort for most. Besides, the passage is much too long for anyone without a Vision to swim through without the danger of drowning- you’ve had to haul a few corpses out in the past, and that was enough to dissuade most of the other prisoners, it seems. Good for security, but boring for you, as there’s little else to do but watch water drip from the ceiling and skirt around the jagged bits and edges of metal left on the walls and floor. Occasionally a gardemek going through its initial testing will join you, and you’ll idly teach it to play rock paper scissors- so far, you’ve kept up a 50% win rate against the robotic soldiers- but nothing more. At least it smells of rain here instead of smoke and fire. You’re alone on the day that the noises begin, sitting on a crate and mistaking them for distant ocean waves and the clanging of hammers against metal. They’re simple at first- vague splashes and a faint scratching sound- but as you listen they morph into something else, like echoing cries, or perhaps a song through the sea. Something beautiful, for once, one corner of your mouth twitching up ever so slightly- what few friends you have call this expression your “almost-smile”, and know it’s as pleased as you’ll get. Something close.

Your almost-smile vanishes as your ears pick up the distinct sound of something swimming through water, the water that flows through this small passage, scrambling to your feet and snatching your weapon from its spot on the floor as whatever-it-is turns the corner, the water’s surface rippling. You really should’ve taken up on His Grace’s offer to get you a rifle. You’re expecting the aquatic thing to burst forth from the sea, attacking you first and asking questions once you’re dead, but instead you’re greeted with the sight of two crimson horns poking out into the air, the water stilling if not for slight movements. Slowly, steadily, your gaze follows the horns down as a head rises out of the water, a single crystalline eye blinking curiously and settling on your form. There’s a moment of silence, and then the creature chirps. You can only freeze in place, brows furrowed in deep confusion as the beast- Archons, it’s big- hauls itself onto shore, tilting its head this way and that as it cautiously approaches. The hand holding your weapon tightens, your heartbeat almost painful, and the monster’s eye widens as it pauses, glancing nervously from you to your weapon and back again.

With slow, deliberate movements, you watch as the beast lowers its head to your height, letting out a soft trill. It almost sounds apologetic, hunching its shoulders inward shamefully, and something in your heart, the one you molded and fixed into being cold and quiet, cracks. You lower your weapon, eyes narrowed, and you swear you hear the creature purr. Legacy is its name, his name- Foul Legacy, a monster from beneath your world. But he’s a monster only in appearance, you’ve learned, navigating the ocean with boundless curiosity and a demeanor sweeter than any Fontainian dessert or cake that you’ve ever eaten. Tell me everything, he begs, scratching his claws through the dirt in a language you only vaguely remember from an old book. Tell me anything and everything- about this world, about here, about there, about you. He likes you, you’re kind and caring and gentle, so unlike the countless stars he’s seen before. You try to protest. You’re not caring, or gentle, or kind- you’re a guard of Fontaine’s prison, someone who was stabbed through your spine and constructed walls around your fragile heart, watching the Fortress to make sure that no one could ever be hurt like that again. You’re not soft or loving, you’re not. But Foul Legacy merely chitters, fluttering those sparkling wings that you swore used to be fins and staring at you so sincerely that you’d think he adored you.

And he does adore you, loves you, even. Ah, if only he spoke your language, the language of mortals that his tongue can’t seem to wrap around, if only he could say three simple words and hug you close, showering you in affection. But he can’t touch you. The last time he tried you had clamped your teeth down on your tongue, a drop of blood falling from your mouth as your skin burned like acid, a sickly heat creeping up before you had jolted away, gasping for air. Legacy whined in concern, trying to nudge your seemingly-unblemished hand, but you’d simply shaken your head and stepped away, slightly feverish. Every person in Fontaine is born with sin. No matter how the Nation of Justice holds trial after trial, this sin cannot be absolved. He didn’t touch you after that, merely curling his body carefully around yours during your visits, hanging on to your every rambling word and always parting with the same question- Tomorrow? Yes. You’d return tomorrow, despite your chilly expression and flat words and tone. You always return tomorrow.

The Fortress has been buzzing with energy- not that it isn’t always- but the arrival of a certain golden Traveler has kept everyone on their toes, the dread and anticipation of something happening seeping into your bones, because it’s always something whenever that Traveler and their tiny, floating companion are around. You almost prefer your monotonous routine from before, but a small smile blooms slowly on your face when you watch Foul Legacy happily splash around in the water, shaking his head and cooing as the droplets rain down around him. He chirps at you curiously, your quiet, fond expression reflected back in his sapphire eye, and you just let out a small laugh and wave your hand as he stares at this new facet of you in awe. With a soft plink, a bead of water falls and lands on your cheek, a hiss of annoyance escaping you as you quickly swipe it away, settling between your nail and finger. It burns, and your throat closes up in horror. Not a minute later, Wriothesley’s voice rings out through the building. “All residents, evacuate immediately.” There’s a crackling pop and a split second of silence, before the alarm blares and your ears ring with pain. Until one day, the water levels in Fontaine will rise, and the sinful people will slowly be drowned.

Your hands slam against the barred door, tearing desperately at the metal that mercilessly rips into your fingers and closes off the room you always guard so carefully from the rest of the Fortress- they forgot you. They forgot you. They forgot you and left you here to drown and rot, and your eyes burn with repressed tears, fear enveloping your senses like a sticky, jagged web. No no no- you swore you’d never be this afraid again, that you’d never surrender so easily again, that you’d never cry ever ever again. A soft, concerned whimper snaps your head around, Foul Legacy standing behind you. His wings droop at your damp eyes, claws twitching and curling from the urge to hold and hug and comfort you as is right and proper, banish the panic away because it scares him to see you, normally so composed and quiet, this terrified; instead he shakes his head and trills, hastily beckoning for you to follow him, boots splashing in the water stretching into a long passage. Out. It leads out. It leads out to the sea and the surface, where you can breathe and cry and admire the sun, and your feet move forward before you can even think. You want to live- yes, finally you want to live. You want to live and be able to smile and laugh again, keeping the warmth that this strange, otherworldly monster brought to your life and never let go.

With a deep breath, you plunge into the water, kicking your feet and pushing yourself in the general direction of the path. Foul Legacy guides you with his chirps, now turned to eerie, song-like notes under the waves. His tail and fins- weren’t those just wings?- propel him faster than you could ever dream, yet still he slows his pace and stays behind with you, and your heart feels like it's joining in on his melody. The water swirls around you like oil, lungs burning as a few stray bubbles trickle out of your mouth and you taste salt on your lips. What little you can see in your murky vision flickers black, and Legacy lets out a sudden, terrified shriek. In the end, the people will all be dissolved into the waters, and only the Hydro Archon will remain, weeping on her throne.

It’s just salt in your mouth now, the taste coating your tongue in a horridly thick layer. Your fingers twitch as they burn, pushing through the water with arms heavy as lead. Foul Legacy whimpers and sobs in despair, grasping his claws around your wrist to try to pull you out, get you to the surface away from this sickened water only for the ocean itself to sink its teeth in and hold fast. What’re you trying to do, again? You’re having trouble remembering where you are, what you are, who you are, scrubbing your eyes again and again and swallowing gulps of salty seawater. This is where you’re supposed to be. This feels safe, comforting- you’re going home after all this time, see, somewhere less confining and fleeting. Finally, you’ll be where you belong, free from the bindings that hold all of Fontaine in their grasp. There’s a vague sense that someone has wrapped their arms around you, faint, anguished wails echoing through the depths, and when you finally open your eyes again you see stars dancing across ripples and tides. You return to the Primordial Sea, and Foul Legacy’s talons close on only foam and bubbles. Only then will the sins of the people of Fontaine be washed away.

I beg u plz more ghost face x child!reader (platonic of course!) like…Stu and billy just got back to their place and the reader runs up to them but they trip and hurt their knee and one of them is trying to calm down the reader while the other one goes to get bandages and stuff? I really like your ghost face stuff and take your time have a good day/night!

Ok ok ong it's literally during my exam but it's sunday so i have a day off and I've been itching to touch this dead account again ahaha. (Note I'll be back on i think Thursday or a week later)

A/n: this is literally crack

Ghostfaces x child! reader (pla)

Who would've thought to see two infamous haunting serial killers were fussing over a crying child.

Strangers on the street witnessing a man in a really recognizable ghostface costume, half yelling and half whispering at a child on the ground to stop crying and trying to bribe them with money while sounding on the verge of breaking down himself. While the other seemingly calm but power walks to who knows where urgently.

One of the strangers too close for comfort, try to quietly and cautiously dial 911.

"Uhm hello...? I think a child is being harassed and attacked by two grown men in a ghostface costume..."

"What?"

"are you calling the cops on us?"

The woman screamed and rushed to get away somewhere but got caught by ghostface's/stu's knife thanks to his quick movement.

"Hello ma'am? Hello? Are you there? Ma'a-"

Stu crushed the phone. He was already stressed enough by the little kid on the ground with a small, scratched and bleeding knee having tears over their face.

Internally screaming at Billy to hurry tf up because he doesn't know what to do. He lifts you up and runs to where Billy was headed.

"Why do kids have to be like this!?" The man cries out with a small infant in his arms who cries along with him.

Billy ran off to somebody's house to break in and steal nothing but all of their medkit. Goddamn he should've caught and noticed you were losing your balance when you came to greet them so lovingly.

He body slammed into a large window, somehow managed to get in and ran to find the bathroom, it took a couple of minutes but once he did he was absolutely violating the hell out of the bathroom mirror. Then his last straw came. The fucking light of a flashlight shoved up his face.

"Uhm excuse me. what the fuck are you doing in my house?"

"...."

He then proceeded yell out curses and body slam directly into the person's head which ended up in him losing more than half of the products in his hands but he didn't care. He just needed to gtfo.

Now the infamous ghostface was yet again spotted with a bundle of medicine and running around. I wonder what image this will have on the ghostface industry.

Now the two bumped into each other miraculously and now were currently working on making you stop because their adrenaline has run out completely.

"Billy what do we do!?"

"How the hell should i know."

*you softly still sobbing*

Which didn't even take long fortunately since the pain decreases overtime. Now they were also seen holding a sleeping kid with a bandage wrapped around their knee. Let's just hope word doesn't get around.

So sorry this didn't contain much reader 😭🙏🙏

I always got you.

Pairing: Joel Miller x reader

Word count: 800+ words

Summary: Reader restlessly tries to sleep in their and Joel's shared bed as their fear of death torments their mind. Joel wakes up and comforts reader as they talk about their past with their fear of death.

Notes/warnings: angst, fluff, swearing, soft/comforting Joel, established relationship, mention of death/fear of death/thanatophobia, crying, panic attack, happy ending, no use of y/n or pronouns.

A/N: Guess who back! Ahaha sorry for not posting for a few weeks again. Still haven't got my laptop fixed and I've been low on energy due to looking after my grandad more and busy work days. Decided to write this last night and finished it today, its honestly heavily inspired by my own experience with thanatophobia. My first fluff/angst piece and I quite enjoyed writing it actually and will not be opposed to write some more in the future. As always hope you enjoy, and feedback is always appreciated.

***********

Sweat beads your creased forehead as you toss and turn in your bed. You try and push away these thoughts and nightmares of death that plague your mind as you sleep, but you can't.

You feel your heartbeat race in your chest, and your breath grows rapid as this undeniably warm, empty, feeling consumes you.

You hear Joel groan behind you as he slowly wakes up from you moving around.

You bite your lip as the tears start flowing, holding your breath so you don't loudly sob in front of Joel.

"You alright, darling?" He asks sleepily.

You gulp and try your best to respond as you normally would but it comes out in a broken cry instead.

"I..I'm f-ine."

Joel face immediately contorts in concern as he scoots closer to your back and rubs your arm.

"You don't sound fine, sweetheart... tell me, what's wrong?"

You swallow your cries harshly, more tears trickly slowly down your cheeks, and you squeeze your eyes shut, hoping it will just go away.

"I'm fine Joel.....please just go to sleep."

Joel face contorts in concern as he moves to turn on the bedside lamp and back towards you, seeing your tear streaked cheeks.

"Oh baby, you're crying. What's bothering you, huh?"

You can't hold you cries back any longer and begin sobbing loudly. Joel immediately pulls you into him and strokes your hair, cooing you softly.

"Hey, hey, it's okay, I got you.....I always got you." Joel rubs soothing circles on your back.

You try your best to breathe normally, but your throat feels as though it's closing up. You gasp out, trying to breathe properly, failing.

"Breathe baby, breathe." He slowly turns your body so he can see your face and holds you close to him, planting soft kisses to your forehead.

"I....I...don't want to lose....you Joel....I....I...can't....lose you..." You manage to croak out.

"Hey, hey, I'm here. You're not going to lose me, baby. I'll make sure of it." He holds you tighter.

"You don't understand it...it's...it's not just about surviving in this world from the infected and raiders and shit....it's...fuck." You spit out, panicked breathes, choking the words.

"Hey it's okay, take your time, you can tell me."

You swallow hard a few times before managing to speak.

"It's....I'm afraid of death okay....and I know, I know who isn't....but it's...it's more than that...started before all this shit happened...."

Joel goes to speak.

"And before you say....it's apart of life...we..we..all gotta accept that....and make...make the most of everyday....I already know that and have been told that many times before okay....."

Joel continues rubbing your back and down, listening intently to your broken voice.

"I....I...I've have had a fear of death for as long as I can remember, one of my first very vivid memories....was me bawling my eyes out to my parents about how I didn't want to die or anyone else to die....."

Tears start flowing down your cheeks again.

"I...I...I...can't even remember learning about death.....I just remember having these horrible thoughts about everyone I love dying one day...since I was about 4 years old.....this warm horrible feeling consuming my body as I tried to sleep."

You try to take a few deep breaths.

"It...it ..went away after a while....but It it came back in my teenage years....fuck I couldn't count how many times....I...I cried myself to sleep at night...thinking about death...thinking about if I never woke up...."

Your eyes are bright red from the salty tears that stain them. Joel lower his head to look you in your eyes. He cups you cheeks with his hand and tenderly strokes his thumb across you cheek. He let's a few seconds pass, think how best to respond before clearing his throat.

"Baby as long as I live I will be here for you, and I know the thought of losing me is scary, we can't waste what precious time we have together on when and what will happen in the future."

He kisses your forehead firmly and wraps his arms around you somehow more tightly.

"I love you so so much and I will gladly spend every second of my life with you, I am here to support you, to love you, to care for you as long as I'm around, I know it's hard but please try and remember that we just go to make the best of life by enjoying out limited time together."

You screw your eyes shut again, the tears that well in your corners of your eyes now from joy and overwhelming sense of love and comfort Joel always manages to give you. You take a deep breath and hold him closely, listening to his strong, steady heartbeat, hoping that you will able to hear the sound for a long, long time to come.

"Thank you, Joel..... love you to the moon and back Joel, forever and ever, I'm yours."

He smiles softly and plants a firm kiss on your lips and then your forehead while stroking your hair.

"I love you too, baby, more than words could ever say, with my entire being."

You both smile and submit your selfs to each other's familiar and comforting warmth bodies and scent. Your eyes both softly closing as you hold each other tightly, falling asleep in each other's arms.

************

Fuffy blanket for Jay, please? 🥺

Eden

Whumptember day 24. Muffled screams

TW: nightmares, trauma, mild self harm, biting, bruises, creepy/intimate whumper, carewhumper, pet whumpees, multiple whumpees

Note: This is set a while before Jay's death, obviously.

Christopher woke up to the sound of screaming. This wasn't unusual in the summer, when the woods were full of screech owls who loved to give him a show. But in the middle of winter, when all the birds had flown south, the sound filled him with dread.

He got out of bed, folding his blankets neatly out of habit, and walked to the bedroom where Ezra and Jay's slept. As he knocked lightly on the door, the sound of screaming quickly muffled itself.

The door creaked as it opened, and Christopher saw that Ezra was still fast asleep. And no wonder, with how exhausting of a day he had been through. Jay's sat up next to him, biting down on their own arm to keep from making noise.

Not wanting stress Ezra by waking him, Christopher gently helped Jay stand up from the bed. They followed him back to his own room, guided by his hand around their own. Their trembling nearly caused them to fall at multiple points, so Christopher was careful to walk slowly.

Jay sat down on Christopher's bed, trying to act submissive even as they stifled their sobs by biting down on their arm as hard as they possibly could.

"That's enough of that," Christopher scolded. "You're hurting yourself."

Jay dropped both their hands to their lap, crying harder than ever. The nasty bruises on their arm were dark red, struck through with deep lines of purple.

"I- I'm s- I'm sorry," they wailed. "I'm s- so sorry."

Christopher squeezed Jay in a tight hug. "Breathe. Take deep breaths. You're going to be fine. I am not mad at you."

"I had a stupid nightmare and- and... I don't know." Jay shivered, and rubbed their arms. "I'm sorry I woke you up, sir. I'm so so sorry."

Christopher wrapped his blanket around Jay's shoulders. They clung to it, as though the fluffy material might offer them protection from more than just the cold.

"You have nothing to apologize for," Christopher said. "I only wanted to make sure you were alright."

"Yes sir."

"I love you. I hope you know that."

"I-" Jay choked back their tears. "I love you. I really really do.

"Why don't you sleep in here tonight? I'm a light sleeper, so I'll wake you up if you have another nightmare. And I'll be right here if anything happens."

"Thank you, sir." Jay wiped the tears from their eyes. "Thank you. I'll try to be better."

Christopher knew he had to talk Jay out of their need to be "good", considering that Colt's standards of morality and reasonable conduct had been... questionable, to say the least.

But for the time being, getting them cozy in bed to ward off sleep deprivation was very important. He knew full well that emotional conditioning took a very long time to do or undo.

Taglist: @hugh-lauries-bald-spot @thedarkmongoose @whumpsday @whump-by-robin @kira-the-whump-enthusiast @annablogsposts @whumpshaped @seetheothersideofparadise @knittedeyebrowsandcardigans @whatwasmyprevioususername @boonasaurusrex @suspicious-whumping-egg @heavenlyeden @melancholy-in-the-morning @snakebites-and-ink @suck-my-clit-loser @i-eat-worlds @scp-1296 @chiswhumpcorner @skittles-the-whumpee @whumpkin @dokidokisadness @enbygesserit @canislycaon24 @be-gay-do-crime-ahaha @a-crumb-of-whump

i feel so called out by the commuter student who can't drive bc even though i can my anxiety refuses to let me drive on the highways 🙃

Let the all kill begin, just to condense things (and reduce the post spam lmfao I'll put screenshots here AHAHA

Anyway no yeah, Rose, like I be telling everyone if you're not going to live on campus you have to get your license because I mean it when I say you almost can't do shit without it esp cuz clubs meet after classes end. Like, I couldn't actually drive to uni until I was in my junior year and even then since I was new I feared for my life that first year!

Honestly a slight TMI but I remember at the time when my parents told me that I was in middle school. My best friend at the time just came out as bisexual and our parents were close, so her parents would tell mine that they were hoping it was just a phase (it wasn't) and also at that time I think anti-lgbtqia+ tensions were so high where we lived so when my mom told me that, of course, at the time I felt so betrayed by her because she had various family members in the community. But looking back at it in hindsight, I get it. If I was her, I don't know how I'd protect my young child, who was barely entering her teens, from a society that already hated who she was because she was a racial minority.

When I finally came out to my mom like a few months ago she straight up told me she wasn't surprised because of my fashion choices LMFAO Converse, Skinny Jeans, and Flannels (so many of them)

NO BECAUSE LIKE one of the things I was going for was to accentuate OC's relationship with Somi by making her relationship with her parents so tense. Everyone talks about car ride convos, but the tension between OC and her dad in that scene was my attempt at some narrative to kinda sorta ostracize her from her parents. And true to life, I can't tell my dad anything LMFAO

You think you know them and suddenly you find out the Mitochondria isn't just the powerhouse of the freaking cell

Me getting blackout drunk and/or fucking railed at parties while my parents tell everyone how studious I am 🤩

do as i say and not as i do

NO CUZ I WATCHED TOY STORY AND SUDDENLY I COULDN'T GIVE UP ANY OF MY TOYS toy story 3 fucked me up fr fr

ALSO NO DONT APOLOGIZE I LOVE INBOX SPAM speaking of you dropped a few things while i was gone i should go binge those soon 👀

Dude NO studying gets done in those rooms my most vivid memory was me explaining how tf dp works to my friends who both (a) asked and (b) didn't get the concept for some reason-

Then we trauma dump about past relationships it's perfect-

NO REST FOR THE WICKED DFJSHDFJHDF like just call them exams at that point. They're not a midterm if they're multiple of them 😭

I used to say fucking anything to get my motivation up before the exam HAAHAHAHA

It's true, the trauma bonding really helps too

Had to tie it in somehow. Another TMI but I gave mine away recently, I had like this weird manic depressive episode so I buried it in a box we were going to send off to GoodWill. Not to be dramatic, but it hurt looking at it.

You're welcome, love, I sobbed too-

But fr though I meant it when I say I went through a ride writing this fic, and there's just so much more that we did together, me and the girl I based this off of, that I left out that I almost feel like how I wrote her here didn't do her justice. But like, it's fine. (me crying at god awful hours in the morning)

Chu !!! (i think you've answered this already I'm so sorry... but I can't find it) I just want to know what's your writing secret ? :3 and some tips and tricks ? Because you really do write stories that CONNECTS us to the characters, which is rare amidst most other writers here. You have a way to use simple sentence that explains a lot without overexplaining it and I love it 🥹 How do you come up with such sentences and scenarios ? Please reply whenever, hope you have a good day ! <3

oh my :') if it isn't an ask that will make me cry... once again, thank you so much and i'm so flattered that you think that way!🥹 i honestly think i'm average still *sobs*

okay and i think all of tips i've answered in previous asks are like so vague even to me too after reading it so i'll put a more decent explanation below the cut :')

write when you have free time and are most comfortable. when writing, i usually do it at night when i'm free from my office job and play a song according to the ambience of the fic i'm writing. if i'm writing crack, then i listen to playful music (bigbang's bang bang bang or fantastic baby works for me one time🥹), if i'm writing fluff then i'll put romantic songs on repeat, and if i'm writing angst then i'm listening to sad songs (*cough* eric chou's songs...) for me it helps a lot because i can picture the scenarios better after the setting is set through music

write it all. every single sentence. this is my main point in my previous writing tips. once you get the scenario you want to write, just write them all. it's going to be messy, ugly and like a total pile of vomit, i know, but trust me, that's a part of the process. if you're having difficulties with what kind of scenario to write, you can search for writing prompts! and if you're short on vocabulary like me, then you can find more in a list of similar words or use this website -> it works to me at least

go through what you write. this is the longest process to me :') so after vomiting everything, i always read through and reword all of them again. next it's more of what kind of a writer you are: 1) if you focus on more on feelings/descriptions, then you can elaborate more by using flowery words, or 2) if you're like me, who focus on actions more, then you can go through it mostly to reduce the unnecessary actions/words/explanations. i try to simplify each action so it won't be too long and redundant -> it's how i came up with short sentences ahaha

be confident. it's the core of it all honestly :') don't be afraid, just believe in yourself! we're all just little people in tumblr posting our imaginations so what's there to be afraid of? no one's gonna bite us even if we mess up verbs or two!

and most important of all, take it easy! again, we're doing this for fun... no one is going to haunt us for not writing on time!

so yeah, that's all i'm going to say! :') i really hope this will help you in any way... and once again thank you so much for thinking that my lil stories make you feel connected to the characters!🥺🩵 that makes me so, so happy!!

Belphie sat on his bed, his head laying on the white pillows. He looked around his room, thinking he'll immediately sleep due to him being 'The Avatar of Sloth' or whatever.

He just laid down, eager to have his fateful rest. The thing is, he couldn't sleep. Now, that must be uncharacteristic, but if you read through the Belphegor messages, you can see that it isn't rare.

He just groaned, sitting up from his bed, still hugging a pillow in his arm. "Goddamnit." He muttered, sighing. He went off of his bed, kneeling on the floor due to boredom. "Let me just message MC." He said.

The dark-haired demon sent a text to the said person in his D.D.D, and awaiting a response from them. 'Hey, are you still up?' Was what he said, looking at his phone eagerly.

He heard a 'ding!' from his phone, after refreshing for 10 minutes. 'It's 8PM... but yeah!' The person replied, making Belphie sigh in relief.'I can't sleep. I don't know why. I got an idea, how about you throw a pie in Lucifer's face?' He stifled a laugh, before replying to the message sent to him.

'To be honest, I don't know if I want to die today.' The reply was instantaneous, making Belphie jump in surprise. "Huff. They died once.." That simple comment about them made him freeze.

"But.. from me. After they... saved me two times..." Was all the demon could muster, before choking out a sob. "Ahaha.. Yet they still forgave me!" The demon grinned, yet clearly not happy.

The purple haired demon looked at the floor of his room, upset and angry. Even a tinge of annoyance. "I.. can't believe I.. had a grudge.." The demon couldn't even form proper sentences, remembering vividly what he had done.

Belphegor quickly stood up and jumped onto his bed, the male loudly sobbing into his pillow. "I literally caused myself to be in this situation! Yet a mere human, with zero powers, had to get me out of it!" He banged his fist into his pillow.

The same male frowned, tears still dripping from his eyes.Belphegor cried, sinking into his pillows. He ignored the running of footsteps, too upset to even do anything. "Belphegor, MC's worri-" The older demon froze when he saw the younger sob into his pillow, without a care in the world.

Lucifer blacked out, before going back into consciousness. He stayed quiet, frowning at the demon before him. "Bel..phegor?" He paused in the middle of the sentence, looking at Belphegor flinching.

Belphegor turned around, startled by who was there. Once seeing the ravenette, his worries tightened. Yet he simply scoffed and looked back at his pillow, tears still dripping, though softly on the pillow.

"Belphegor. Why... Why are you crying?" Lucifer bit his lip. He wasn't exactly the best at comforting others, let's just hope he could do at least something. "Shut up, I don't feel like talking with you." Lucifer could feel the glare, even when his head was turned around.

"Wait. Belphie." Lucifer frowned, not taking notice of the nickname. Belphegor's eyes widened, and He looked at Lucifer with this dumbfounded look. "Did you just.." He wavered off, making Lucifer realise what he said.

(lmao Lucifer's the avatar of pride, where's the pride now?)

"Oh. Well, Uhm." Lucifer awkwardly shuffled his feet, clicking his tongue. Lucifer's pale cheeks felt like they were burning, making him frown in return. "I apologise, Belphegor. I don't think you'd allow me of all people to say the nickname given by your brother." Lucifer sighed.

Belphegor sighed, running a hand through his hair before turning around. "Okay. I don't care if you call me 'Belphie' or 'Belphegor'. It's the fact that you even said my nickname." He rolled his eyes, before staring at Lucifer.

"I often feel like you're not even my brother, yet suddenly you turn over and call me 'Belphie'? The name is usually said by people I consider family?" Belphegor chuckled. "I'm surprised, Lucifer." He grinned, clearly enjoying the pain on Luci's face."Listen.. If you wanted me to go, You could have told me so." Lucifer spat, salty about the fact that his pain was the thing that made Belphegor stop crying, and even chuckle.

"Nah. I'm good. You stay." Belphegor's smirk caught Lucifer off guard. "..Belphegor! Just tell me what's wrong!" Lucifer whisper-yelled, making the temperature in the room drop.

'Oh. I shouldn't have said that.' Lucifer panicked, looking at Belphegor, who's face dropped. "I-" Lucifer began to say, before being interrupted. "No, No. It's fine. I'll just tell you, I guess." He said, a disgruntled expression (big words) on his face.

"I.. I feel like.. I feel like such an asshole for killing MC after they released me 2 times." He mumbled, looking at the floor. Belphegor could feel the hardened looks placed on him by Lucifer.

"And.. Um.. I just feel like I'm not a part of the family anymore since I've been gone for so long.." Tears welled up in his red, puffy eyes as he explained. Lucifer's hardened gaze turned into an uncharacteristic fond one.

"...Belphegor." Lucifer's once loud words were soft and felt comfortable to listen to. Belphegor's head instantly went up, like a dog getting called by its owner. (don't think about it it's just a metaphor)

"Listen. Though you did kill MC, and it was traumatic for everyone, I know it's because you still couldn't trust humans." Lucifer was now walking closer to Belphegor, while Belphegor just sat there, shell-shocked.

"And you are a part of the family, it's just that.. It's hard to adjust for the others." And then, he.. HUGGED HIM? WHAT?! Belphegor was pulled into a hug by Lucifer himself?..

Belphegor felt tears in his eyes, but not the same, old, miserable tears. It was happy tears. Belphegor felt unnecessary joy at the moment. To be told that by Lucifer? It just feels great.

MC walked into the room, not expecting Lucifer to be hugging Belphegor. Serotonin. They smiled fondly, before walking away quietly, not wanting to disrupt the moment.

-archival-

scenario | crime fighting au | police x criminal | hero × villain au (technically could be)

Female!Outlaw (A) x Male!Law Enforcer (B)

(feel free to change the genders!)

- A has gone through a betrayal arc with the people she works with so she decided to take revenge

- B had a lover that passed away that A reminds him of, which is why he's always on her case, inside his heart hoping that she's actually a good person, although projecting the image of his past lover onto her, which is unhealthy

- At some point A has actually fallen for B, but knowing about how he only sees her as his past lover, she refuses to let him into her heart

- So back to the storyline, she's taken revenge and is watching everything burn down. B manages to find her

- "There were other ways to bring justice to those guys, you know?"

- "Hah, what did you think I could do? Call the police? And get myself caught in the process? Besides, I couldn't care less about justice, so for the last time stop lecturing me. I'm not a good person like you want me to be."

- B was about to protest, but decided to hold his tongue. It wasn't going to go anywhere; it never does. He changed the topic instead. "...still, this isn't like you... to take reckless decisions. You're usually more careful aren't you?"

- A scoffed. 'Well it's not like I have anything to lose.' she glances over at B '....Almost anything.' Again, she knew he'd just lecture her about the worth of living, so she decided to mess with him instead.

- "Heh, what if I did it to grab your attention? Steal your heart?" She snorted, cringing at her cheesiness.

- However, to her surprise, B silently approached her. He gripped her wrist, turning her around to face him, and put a hand on her cheek. The deep blush spreading across her face betrayed her bewilderness.

- "And what if you already did?"

- A's heart skipped a beat. But she shook her head, as if to not let it get to her. 'Remember, he's only saying that because he sees his past lover in you. He doesn't actually like you back. I was joking anyways ahaha...'

- When she felt B's hand wipe her cheek gently, only then did she realize that she was crying.

- 'Stupid fucking feelings...'

- "You've learned a long time ago about my past lover, haven't you? I know what you're thinking. I'd be lying if I said I didn't see my lover in you at first... but soon I've come to realize that you and her are two different people. Completely different. But even after realizing that... my feelings for you didn't die out. I started falling in love with you for you. For little things such as your witty little comebacks, the sound of your laughs, the rare sight of your genuine smile. I've fallen hard, you've completely captured my heart... It's also why I truly believe you're a good person at heart. You've shown that you have empathy for other people, I've seen how you... you don't want to be doing all the crimes you're committing, but you have no choice. You were in debt to those guys weren't you? You had to do it to survive. So stop convincing yourself that you're a bad guy, that you're not someone worth saving! Those who've been holding you on leash and collar, they're no more, so you don't have to continue this lifestyle anymore. You can still turn a new leaf, if you make up for the things you've done, and the weight will finally be lifted off your shoulder. So please..."

- A stepped away from him, sobbing silently as her tears refused to stop. B smiled gently at the sight. Never has he seen her so vulnerable, and the fact that she's no longer hiding from him... does it mean that she's finally opened her heart to him?

- He slowly approached her, warily putting his arms around her, not sure if she'd welcome the gesture. A let herself into his arms, fully embracing the sense of security she hadn't experienced before.

- Is it okay to love now?

End.

Epilogue!AU

- After some time and circumstances A finally gets a clean slate. B is overjoyed but they don't get together right away because A needs more time duh lol. B IS WILLING TO WAIT HOWEVER LONG IT WILL TAKE IM AJSBSKSBKSNS HE REALLY WILL

- Gentlemanly and cheesy, he's always lowkey flirting with her but always being a gentleman with her. IT DRIVES A'S HEART CRAZY AND ANNOYS HER AT THE SAME TIME. Bro she's really playing hard to get but B is just as persistent LOL

- WHEN THE TIME COMES WHERE SHE WILL ACTUALLY ACCEPT HIM TO BE LOVERS HE WILL BE SO HAPPY I THINK HE'D CRY TEARS OF JOY AND THANK HER PROFUSELY AJBSMSSSHBDMS

- Pretty much the same predating era only this time he has the ✨dating privelleges✨ now... sort of

- To A's surprised he's never made any physical advances with her apart from holding her hand. She realizes that he's being cautious about her comfort. While she does find that sweet it's also bothering her. So what does she do? TAKE MATTERS INTO HER OWN HANDS

- After a simple park date B walks her home as usual, but before he leaves, A tells him to wait. He turns around and suddenly the girl has her hands on his cheeks and initiates their first kiss YES GO GIRL

- IT HAPPENED ALL IN A SPLIT SECOND. By the time B came to his senses, the door was slammed shut with A nowhere to be seen. He did, however, catch a glimpse of her very red face ahehe

- BUT THEN THE REALIZATION THAT THEY ACTUALLY KISSED CRASHES DOWN ON HIM AND NOW HES A BLUSHING MESS. He walks home with a stupid grin on his face LOL

- BECAUSE A CERTAIN FRIEND OF MINE CALLED HIM A MALEWIFE I CANT UNSEE IT ANYMORE AKSBKSSNMS A cant cook or do any housechores to save her life so all of that is B's thing. He lives alone so he's an expert at it 👌✨ Cooks hella good too get you a man like that LOL

- Now that I think about it I think A appreciates Acts of Service the most, but secretly loves Physical Touch. B is someone who gives Words of Affirmation and does Acts of Service, but enjoys Quality Time the most

- ngl their differences in mindset, esp A's stubborness and difficulty to trust, leads to small quarrels initiated by her mostly. B always apologizes first but A would eventually apologize as well.

a/n: gosh i have so many stuff that ive written but theyre all over the place (notes, docs and my one oc channel in a server w my friends :"D) that i have to find them all OTL for now these ones are from my notes

(oml okay so I know you answered my Great Ace Attorney ask like. three weeks ago at this point, but I'm finally getting around to writing a response. I hope you remember what you talked about or can find that ask again alskdfgjfkd I'm so sorry-) First of all, OLIVE IS SUCH A GREAT FAVORITE CHARACTER YOU HAVE IMMACULATE TASTE!!! I felt SO bad for her oh my god, the moment where she tried to poison herself... holy shit it hit. it hit so hard, it's probably one of the darkest and most depressing moments in the game (and lord knows there's so much heavy shit in this game). 💔 TGAA does a lot of subversions from the main AA series, but I loved how she was an (attempted) culprit but also her "victim" was a culprit as well... it's utterly fascinating, I loved what they did with her character and 2-2 in general. She's one of the most realistic and grounded and subtle characters in the game imo, like she feels so normal: she's depressed, and she's bitter, and hateful, but not too hateful, and still sweet despite all of that... I loved her a lot, I want to give her a hug 😭🥹💔 the scene where she thanks Ryuu for helping her get closure was so touching, it made me cry. 💚 I was also really fascinated by her relationship with Shamspeare, or at least his reaction to her, considering that he didn't have any idea of her existence until the trial (I love him too, he's SUCH an interesting character)?? Idk I just think there's so much potential for their interactions post-series, though to be fair I say that about so many characters in this game alsdfjgkfld there's just so much juicy potential for character dynamics... Susato and Yuujin are DEARS, I love them so much 😭🥹💖 It makes me really sad we don't get practically any Susato & Kazuma & Yuujin family content.... I'm forever mad that their (+ Ryuu's) grief over his assumed death is so glossed over, I really feel like Kazuma desperately needed more screentime in the second game where he was allowed to just... be more vulnerable around them and get some sort of emotional catharsis, instead of just being his emo self the whole time :' ) 🫠 it's not bad by any means, I just think he needed so much more. Cause YEAH, his breakdown fucked me up too, it's my favorite scene of his cause it's really the only scene where we get a true taste of how much pain he's bottling up inside UGH. We needed more Mikotoba family scenessssss (seriously, Yuujin doesn't even react at all to hearing that he's alive again and it pisses me off!!! Like that's his adopted son of his dead best friend!!!)

(re: Kazuma though, my favorite Kazuma relationship is actually him and Nikomina from 1-2, or rather, hypothetical relationship. I wrote a fic about them actually lol I just want them to be brother and sister so bad okay :' ) maybe it makes no sense to anyone other than me lol but I need her to know he's aliiiiiive 😭🥺 he treated her so kindly... my heart)

Barok is wonderful, by far my favorite of the main characters and imo has the best written arc of them. He needs a damn HUG and we were robbed of seeing him smile at the end 😭💔 he makes my heart ache godddddd. Van Zieks brothers make me weep. Barok and Iris make me weep *sobs*

As for Graydon...... ahaha how do I even describe it. To be honest my thoughts on him could fill an entire essay; I'm actually responsible for a lot of posts and content about him on tumblr prior to the release of the localization a;lsdfjgkfdls (though under his Japanese name, Rupert Chrogray, which I prefer because I'm a snob lol), he occupied my brain for at least a year after I played the first game, and I still love him to death. He's just a really, really beautiful and complex character to me despite only being in one case... his story is so incredibly tragic, but realistic, and relatable, and so sympathetic to me, not to excuse his actions but he really does break my heart so, so much. I love the hints of characterization we get with him and his father, with him and the brothers, and I also ADORE thinking about his potential relationship with Gina, because they're foils to each other. I think he has SO MUCH POTENTIAL for a redemption arc after the first game, because imo he really is not a bad person deep down, and could change for the better if he's just given the chance to. I just love him sooooo much, I've written a few fics about him lol and I've delved into the Japanese fan content for him because I just need so much more alsdjfgkfld, he's such a beautiful character to me; he's so human, and flawed, and contradictory, but contradictory in a way that makes so much sense and is so well executed. Honestly he could have his own game/media all on his own imo, that's how powerfully well-written he is in such a short amount of time.

And OMG THAT ART OF IRIS AND KYOUKA IS SO ADORABLE AND WHOLESOME, thank you for drawing it 😭🥺💖🐇 my precious girls ✨

HI I'M SO SORRY. I read this ages ago and then just. Never responded. I have no idea why.

I totally agree that one of the things that makes Chronicles so fun is the way you only get a little of most of the trial-only characters, and yet there's so much there as a foundation to play around with! Olive is a great example of that! I love that you wrote about Nikomina and Graydon! I checked out the Nikomina one but still need to go through your Chrogray stories; I'm sure they're just as good a read :)

I really love it when people enjoy the minor or one-off characters. Nikomina really should get to know that Kazuma lived... that'd be a world of guilt off her shoulders, poor girl. It was an accident... I stick to my headcanon that Sholmes told her at some point.

I do agree that the second game kind of was a whirlwind. I imagined a lot of stuff was happening off-screen that we didn't see, especially with regards to the lingering grief concerning Kazuma. I do kind of wish we'd gotten a little less mystery over Yuujin and a little more just getting to be around the man and getting to know him. His story was just really impactful to me. I adore him so much.

I also have some mixed feelings regarding leaving Kazuma somewhat alone in London without his friends at the end of the game... while I don't really see how else it could've ended (it's more realistic; they can't stay in London forever; Kazuma was the one actually supposed to be on exchange), I can't help but feel concerned over him having very little support after a major breakdown/situation that exposed nearly all of his trauma, and still pretty much on that single-minded drive, just in a different, slightly healthier direction (so he can find himself/challenge Naruhodou). I'll be honest, it's now been awhile since I've played the game and I played it late at night so I don't actually recall the ending in detail - it's possible there's something I forgot about here that changes the context a little. I mean, at least we know Sholmes and Iris are going to look out for him...

Also I am a firm believer in post-canon Kazuma and Van Zieks worsties. They can't forgive each other, they begrudgingly understand each other, they can trust the other with pursuing justice, they are petty little shits to each other...

I also like the idea of Sholmes looking out for Kazuma in his own annoying way, and just coming across as... annoying, lol, while Iris keeps finding reasons to "mysteriously" cross paths with Van Zieks, so he cannot shake this weird, genius little pink child. The doors to the prosecutor's office open and the both of them just go "oh no", and then glare at each other because how dare they have the same thought at the same time ahjsbfvsjdfh

Anyways. They're funny to me. Part of me is happy where the story leaves off, and part of me wants a Kazuma Asougi Investigations game, with Van Zieks, Gina, Sholmes, and Iris. (...I actually came up with a rough outline for that very concept... it's a bit self-indulgent though and I have enough projects started... maybe I'll get to it someday... it's actually more like parallel Kazuma-Susato investigations lol)

Sorry again for this woefully delayed response... :/

man im gonna miss the owl house.

its a fucking masterpiece. that ending. Its all wrapped up in a nice and pretty bow and im so happy and im actually crying its precious to me like how gravity falls was, and amphibia (i admit im not the biggest fan of amphibia, with as fear of bugs and also holy shit thats a lot of 'filler' thats technically not filler because they DID have to wait like months to be able to venture outside but eHHH) gravity falls and its entirety was precious and nothing can match watching it for the first time amphibia was pretty and quirky with characters i genuinely cared about and the world building was cool and the owl house is a whole... IT HAD GAY, it had magic, it hAD BOOKS, it had so much stuff that i really liked and im so happy about it. and all of their endings made me cry and im still crying shut up oh my god and i didnt watch the episode like yesterday because i forgot and got distracted (haha sorry) and i want to make something to never forget but i already have the amity necklace, the season 1 poster (because season 2 had sold out by the time i checked sob, huNTeRRR) AghH but its in a pretty bow now and i have nothing to write about it. the perfect show honestly has to be the one that there's nothing that you can add to it because its perfect.

theres nothing that makes me want to add on to it, nothing to build out angsty and sad scenes (i mean it had everything i wanted LMFAO. anything else would have to just be like either a drabble, or like canon divergence and therefore hunter pov. because i am the writer who mainly writes male pov, clap clap) AND IM HAPPY FOR HIM HE HDWUISAHDIUA oh my god i just saw the flapjack grave oh my god it just spawned a new set of tears (I HAVENT FINISHED WATCHING THE CREDITS I HAVE WORDS TO SAY)

OH MY GOD AMITY (THEY ALL LOOK NICE. also can i backtrack and talk about how gus reunited with his father, with the illusions of multiple hims and then his dad was just hugging them all and that made me so happy??) also back track further LUZ WAS ROCKING THAT TITAN STYLE and she still has the litlte marks on her eyes (it was probably makeup though maybe? i dont remember if she had that after she turned back i dont think she did? idk) OH OH OH DARIUS (thats abomination coven guy right. oh my god i forgot what their rank was already LMFAO) NAD AND AMITYS DAD ?????? RAINE YOU LOOK SO PRETTY EM(ira? I FORGOT HER NAME. I JUST REMEMBER ED AND EM NAMES ARE FAILING ME RN) OH MY GOD THEIR DESIGNS next thing you know on youtube: nolstalgic the owl house lofi HOLY SHIT IS THAT GUS?

YEAH THATS HIS PALISMAN- HOLY SHIT ??? OH MY GOD EDA. AND SHES WEARING RAINES EARRING THING *SOB* AND HER ARMS A HOOK. OH MY GOD I LOVE HER /P AND THE LIGHT GLYPH im rewatching this so many times im so happy, this is like a literal timeless show in my eyes (like how you can watch gravity falls over and over AGHHH)

OH DEAR STEVE--- its just so perfect and im repeating myself and AGHHHH also can we talk about how they taught the collector what mortality was? i think thats the right word (i was about to say morality haha) LUZ JUST BRRR but like halfway through i remembered that papa titan (like the one from. i think it mightve been the first of season 3...? like when they go through theres that waving guy who sounds like hes running and panting and yelling 'hey' in the background, and i remembered 'OH IS IT HIM') and just oh my god *exaggerated hand movements*

oH MY GOD (and i know thats not the actual light glyph we had before- i know this because i tried drawing it once)

LOOK AT THE LITTLE HORNS AND THE DIAMOND SHAPE ADNWUIAS HDAIUD YEAHHHHHHH MORE LEARNING

i need to take a moment before i cry again my hands are shaking. im going to miss this show. i really hope i can find out what to write in the future (AHAHA unintentional pun to the episode 'in the future') EDIT: NO ITS FOR THE FUTURE, IM SO DUMB ahhh i want to immortalize it. i have this bad habit of forgetting things easily (on the plus side, YEAHHHH i can finally put my half a semester of spanish classes to use for luz!!)

Dev Daries

Feb 3, 2023

IT’S (me again announcing) BLACK HISTORY MONTH AYYYYYYEEEE!!!!!!! 

Okay, some updates of the Crushed variety???

[image ID: a screenshot of the Itch.io page for the visual novel Crushed. end ID]

There are a few things I’d like to tweak before making the page public this weekend, one of them involving 1-2 more/different screenshots. Maaaaaybe some cute little graphics made via Canva?? But I’m starting to get an idea of the visual theme for this project. And it’s happening a lot faster than it did for HSD 😂

[image ID: a screenshot of a cell phone with an ongoing text conversation. end ID]

If this conversation looks familiar, that’s on purpose. I just want to bring your attention to what I’ve accomplished since last time LOL! All that’s left now is to replace the white bubbles with a different color, which is annoyingly not simple??? I also keep putting it off because that requires making A Decision. And I’m decision-ed out 💩 

As y’all are aware, this is for the Black VN game jam. The original plan was to have a small enough project that could be done by or before Feb. 28, but this thing kind of ballooned and I’ve scaled back to “release 6-7k word demo with completed art and graphic assets, music, and text”. 

As of the time of this post, the full 20k something words are coded. I can technically play through the whole thing including the three endings and it’s quite a thrill. I cannot wait until y’all get the same opportunity!!! (Ending 2 still makes me sob like a baby, wheeeeeeeee!)

The plan is to have the game out Summer 2023, but that is dependent on 1) how fast the art is finished (because ya girl is thinking unlockable CGs, but also there’s the sprite art which ahaha is the highest priority...ugh) and 2) how I’m doing health wise. But I will keep y’all posted, and of course I’ve got fun things to share as we wait for the full game to release!

CGs might be up in the air but...voice acting is a thing that’s happening??

Just tonight I had my first live direct with a voice actor y’all and now I see why so many game devs become addicted to incorporating it?!?!? (It’s partial VA so don’t get too excited but get a lil excited because the finished product is gonna sound so cool.)

At this point you’ve maybe seen the character reveals?? Or you’ve seen me Crying On Main and missed the self-reblogs 😭 y’all, I did not want to do a m!MC game!!!! I even went as far as making a post saying I wouldn’t make a BL game (note to y’all, back up ya shit AND never say never). But one of my unwritten mottos for this studio is to tell stories. Tell the stories that won’t let me know peace until they’re out.

And Crushed wouldn’t have worked with an f!MC. And I quickly found out it this story wouldn’t work unless it was bi Black boy. 

the biphobia out here is something I’m going to fight until I’m 6ft under

Black boys and their stories are not a monolith, and I’m sick of teen media being written for adult consumption while disrespecting the teen demographic

one Black teen is going to play this game and it’s my hope, my desire, that they will feel less hollow inside when they finish...

So anyhoo. That’s your update.

If you’re looking for my “special brand” of game reactions and uncensored thoughts, I promise I will make the side blog public sometime 😭 I’ve been switching energy to books and I’m still trying to prove an author I adore wrong! When I asked her how does she balance gaming and reading, she looked into the camera and told me ‘you don’t’ and I hate that years later she’s still right...

And that’s that! I’m off now 🤪

- Gemini

P.S. I still plan on doing the bad endings for An Everyday Love and making it everyone’s problem, and that’s like half the reason I’m dragging my feet, so forgive me 

OMG IM FREAKING OUT RN GIVE ME A MINUTE PLS PLS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I CANNOT BREATH

I've so much to talk about so this might be a bit long (sorry) DURING THE FIRST PART EVEN BEFORE THE ROOF SCENE, I JUST SCREAMED THE WHOLE CHAPTER. I BREAKED OUT LIKE A CRAZY. I SCREAME AND LAUGHED SO LOUDLY TO THE POINT I THOUGHT I WAS MAKING CRAZY HAHAHAHAHA (not in a scary way, ok?) THE SMUT SCENE LEFT ME DIZZY, SHOCKING, BREATHLESS, DESPERATE, FREAKING OUT ETC. YOUR WRITING IS SOOOO FUCKING GOOD, I'VE TOLD YOU THIS BEFORE, BUT I'LL REPEAT IT FOREVER. I FUCKING LOVE YOUR WRITING AS FUCKKKKKKK

YOU'VE ME IN THE PALM OF YOUR HAND ISTG. My mom came the room at the exact moment of angst and saw me crying desperately in bed, and I had to explain between sobs what was happening (I'm ashamed even now) BUT OH MY GOD. IT REALLY HURT MY HEART. I FEEL LIKE MY HEART TORN INTO SEVERAL PIECES 😭😭😭😭 THE WAY HE BEGGED HER TO REMOVE THE WORDS BROKE ME SO BAD AAAAAA 😭😭😭😭😭 I'm crying even while I'm writing this. I really need her to explain everything to him and for everything to be okay

I can't take any more suffering 😭😭😭😭 I trust you a lot and I know it'll be worth all this suffering 😭😭😭 Kiki, you're so amazing. I hope you know this. I love worlds apart, and I love your writing. ANXIOUSLY WAITING FOR CHAPTER 8. (read in capitals as if I'm screaming and crying at the same time ahaha) I ALSO CAN'T WAIT FOR THE TONGUE THING AAAAAAAAAAA died suffering

Sorry, I talk/write too much, but I needed to tell you how awesome you are. I love you, girl. For real. <3 - 🦇💕

Listen when I tell you I've read these sweet asks about ten times by now and they're still making me tear up every single time 😭🖤🖤 Thank you so, so much for your kind words, my dear, they mean the world and they make my little writer's heart soar 🥺🖤😭😍

I can't wait to share Chapter 8, it's gonna be good 👀🖤

i know i say this a lot but ohmygod RANT COMING

i reallt love heeseung :((

so i’m currently studying rn listening to this hee playlist right RIGHT?? U SEE WHERE THIS IS GOING?? doing my shit ahaha procrastinating UNTIL eyes off you comes on. EYES. OFF. YOU. i literally had such a big fat fucking phase with that song and just imagining hee w this song playing has literally changed my whole entire life IM?? HEARTBROKEN?? makes me realize how much i miss him ohmtgod :(( the thought of it makes me wanna cry !! thinking back to how quiet he’s been ever since he’s been getting hate and i’m LITERALLY SO KAKDJ ???!/$/$ that man has made me feel loved for the longest time and he’s been my PURE motivation i need each morning :(( like just thinking about him makes me wanna cry myself to sleep like i rlly rlly love him and i’m sososoosos proud of him for making it this far</333 i hope he knows how perfect he is like ??? hands DOWN. he’s so lovable and sweet i rlly wanna cry now AHHAHA THINKING BACK TO THE TIME I CRIED OVER HIM AT A SCHOOL NIGHR. can u believe it. going on tiktok then suddenly shifting tears at him SMILING?? LIKE?? but ohemgee why do i miss him so much listening to these hee playlists ARENT!! HELPING!! no but the comfort i get when i’m downstairs in pitch black listening to my tv playing enha has gotta b one of the most comforting things i’ve done?? now that i’m watching hee content in the middle of the night the urge to cry rn is RLLY STRONG. i love him sosoosososmuch did i say that already 💀 but i do :((( like i rlly do :((((((( hes been so quiet lately i just hope he’s okay :((((((((( anyways off topic ORETTY MUCH AND HEE??? THINKKKK abt it. mans is so bf material he’s literally gonna make me go insane bc of how perfect he is like i’m not even joking he’s so fucking talented AKAKSNNS HIS GOCALS?? HIS VOCALS??? HELLLO? SO DAMN TALENTED AND FOR WHAT???? MANS IS GOOD AT ANYTHING HE DOES:(( that’s a lotta sad faces in one post AHA not the point im a strong hee stan and that’s been lasting for MONTHS. ILAND……..iland was just the start of it. man i love his vocals smsmsmsm thats literaly the whole reason why i bias him so hard like??? THE MOMENT HE SANG BOOM I KNEW I HAD TO BIAS HIM. THE WAY HE TWISTS THE WORDS BEAUTIFULLY IS SO UNIQUE TO ME?? he’s always had such a talented voice i’m so. i’m wasting my studying time rn but atp idgaf cuz its abt HEE. HEE IN THE MIRNING HEE AT NIGHT HEE IN THE EVENING AND HEE AT SCHOOL jk its not that deep maybe i am delulu but u get what i mean !! do i regret making this !! no !! the strong urge to rant abt the loml was so strong to the point this paragraph became long asf i’m literally so MSMDMSN EYES OFF U AND HEESEUNG AAKSKA now that urge to write a fic abt him is here like i could stay up till 3 writing abt him if i wanted too……./hj heeseung, the loml, my one and only, my everyrhing, my happiness, ETC i love u vvvvvv much !! its so hard to study now, now that i’m writing this shit paragraph but it’s ok. its OK. conclusion i love heeseung so damn much and i miss him…like…a lot…………fuck the sad playlists that r making me cry i genuinely cant do this more am i allowed to sob :(( HELP NOT TALKING TO THE MOON COMING ON?? watch me scroll through hee pics after this cuz i miss him sm and i crave hee pics!! this is a rlly hard time for me guys pray 4 me why am i crying over a man at a school night. SCHOOL NIGHT. IS IT EVEN THAT DEEP…yes. its rhat deep. i rlly canr thank him enough for making me smile sm i :(((( atp what would i do without him ???? ROT???? yes. he genuinely makes me feel like the happiest person ever i’m not even joking there something abt him:(( mans gives off such a comforting and safe feeling i love sm UUGMDJS how do i tell him hes perfect ??? like ??? god hes so perfect i dont even know what to say antmore :((((( hes literally the DEFINITION of perfect. AND I STAND BY MY POINT!!! he’s always been perfect wtaf he’s not even real. HES NOT REAL. THERES MO WAY. this is all literally just my imagination. JUST LOOK AT HIS NAME. HEESEUNG?? fuck even his NAME sounds perfect too. he’s so ethereal i’m not even joking how could i love a man so much i

FUCK THE PARAGRAPH IS TOO LONG

ok well.

i’m so incredibly in love w him i’m literaly rotting inside

not me taking two days to respond ANYWAY 😭 omg a summer trip sounds really exciting!! i hope you have a very fun time where you’re going hehe <33

and i do crochet! im very slowly getting back into it lol but i wanna try to make clothes for my skzoo plushie 😩 i just think a tiny pair of overalls or a hat would be so cute :(

and you ARE my favorite fellow greek mythology enjoyer it is the truth 😭😭 your writing is immaculate too!! i love talking abt that and your au with you <3 (and hmmm i’m not sure about a tag…anything that has to do w mythology or oranges 🍊 is good with me ahaha :))

i took so long to respond too, bestie its okay😭

awh !! thank you :> i hope so too ^^

making accessories for your skzoo plushies sounds so wholesome TT a hat or overalls would definitely be adorable :(

beck. i will cry.... i will break down sobbing, dont test me TT... you're my favourite greek mythology enjoyer too ♡

AND PLEASE YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT TALENT ???? frw&d is genuinely one of my reasons for living, your writing is beyond perfect :( <3

3, 18, & 22 for the writer asks! 💖

3. What is your writing ritual and why is it cursed?

I don’t have one? Does that make it cursed? If I’m at my computer, I’ll write on that, if I’m not, or my computer is too far away (I.e., it’s on the desk and I’m 5 ft away on the couch), I’ll write on my phone. Lately I’ve been going for short walks and writing in my head while I walk? Does that count? That’s cursed because I only remember like 60% by the time I go to actually write it down.

18. Choose a passage from your writing. Tell me about the backstory of this moment. How you came up with it, how it changed from start to end.

Okay, so I picked this passage from chapter 3 of the lie between your teeth:

Patrick shuts the door of the bathroom and sinks down to the floor. This is a good thing. This is what Rachel wants. And his parents want this, his family, his and Rachel’s friends. Getting married is supposed to be objectively a good thing. So why does he feel like crying? No, it’s more than that. His cheeks are already wet. He is crying. Patrick doesn’t cry. He’s always been the strong one, the reliable one, the one to lean on. And yet here he is, having a breakdown on the floor of his parents’ guest bathroom. On Christmas. After proposing to his girlfriend—fiancée. He needs to get it together, Rachel will be wondering where he went.

But instead of getting it together, he thinks about spending the rest of his life like this, and he chokes back a sob.

And this is interesting for me because I normally am a very linear writer. I start at the beginning and write in order. When I first wrote this passage, I was still working on chapter 1 and I was going through a period where I was struggling to write anything during the day, but these angsty, introspective passages would come to me in the middle of the night when I was trying to sleep. I’d hastily write them down in my google doc and hope they were actually good in the morning. There are a couple of these in this fic, at least two in chapter 3, and one in chapter five that I originally wrote from Patrick’s POV before realizing that it wouldn’t work that way.

As for how this passage changed, the last line was very different originally and now that I’m reading it again, I’m afraid the original was better? But it sounded too much like Patrick was basing all of his unhappiness on sex which is not what I was trying to convey.

tldr, I was depressed and had writer’s block during the day and wrote a bunch of shit in the middle of the night!

22. How organized are you with your writing? Describe to me your organization method, if it exists. What tools do you use? Notebooks? Binders? Apps? The Cloud?

Ahaha, not nearly organized enough. I have a separate google doc for each fic. Some have actual titles, some have working titles (the lie between your teeth is still called “dating app au” in my docs), some are just called “untitled document”, which is extremely helpful. I have a doc for ideas that is an absolute mess and a running note on my phone of song lyrics that would make good titles. That’s the extent of my organization!

Weird writer asks!

hi, can i reuqest where ningguang, ei, beidou, jean and lisa have a fem s/o has contast mental break downs and starts crying because of mental health or trauma from the past and get stressed out really easily - kinda angst but this idea popped into my head ahaha 🥰🔫, but i hope you can do it{if you can ofc !!}. thanks, have a good day <3 :)

Her Comforting You After Your Mental Breakdowns

Characters: Ningguang, Raiden Shogun, Beidou, Jean, Lisa x fem!reader

Warnings: none

A/n: Of course ! Thank you for the request, I hope you have a good day as well 🥺

• Ningguang couldn’t be bothered with any emotional nonsense. But that was only when it was a stranger, when it came to you? She would treat you like a queen. She’ll take you out to a night out in Liyue and do your favorite things together.

• Ningguang’s love language was gift-giving, so when you were sad she’d cheer you up with gifts. Nothing was a problem for Ningguang to deliver because she happened to be one of the richest in Liyue. She’ll get you any food you crave, buy any object your looking at, and take you out to whatever you wanted to do.

One moment you were taking a nice stroll with Ningguang around Liyue, the next you had an invasive thought triggered by your surroundings, finally, you found yourself on the nearest bench crying your eyes out. Ningguang had sat you down, stroking your back gently as she drew your head in your bosom. “Now now, you’ll be okay,” she said. “As long as you are by my side I will protect you.”

It was embarrassing to sob in broad daylight in public, you felt especially bad because it could jeopardize Ningguang’s reputation. It was shamed making a girl cry, so people were staring at Ningguang assuming the Tianquan had said something harsh to you. It frankly made you want to cry more.

Ningguang must’ve sensed your guilt and the stares around her, “Here, let’s go somewhere private little one,” She guided you with her palm, allowing her body to overshadow yours so people wouldn’t see your crying face. Luckily you were close to home where you could cry to your heart’s content. 

You took a seat on your couch, Ningguang getting everything in order before addressing you. After a couple of minutes, she sat beside you, looking at you with concern. “Do you want a hug?” She asked. You gave her a firm nod, tears still running down your face. She pulled you into a big bear hug, her arms felt so welcoming. You were grateful you had Ningguang in the first place, especially as your girlfriend.

“I know love,” She was so maternal with her voice and words. “Say, once you’re ready we can go have some fun. Does almond tofu sound delectable right now?” She asked stroking your hair. 

• Ei didn’t understand human emotions, that’s why she oppressed all the citizens in Inazuma for so long during the Vision Hunt Decree. But after she met you, she’s been able to relate to humans on a level she never thought she would have before.

• Ei will consult with Yae Miko before taking you out, asking what humans like to do nowadays to cheer up. Miko will most likely scam her, but it touched you because Ei was trying so hard to please you.

Ei and you were side-by-side on your merry way to pick up some Dango milk to soothe Ei’s cravings for dessert. She was in a happy mood as ever, even humming a soft tune. You were happy as well to just be by her side, but something must’ve swept over you. Your happy mood dissipated in almost an instant, Ei must’ve noticed the shift. Her smile dropped, “Are you okay my love?” she asked.

It’s like that question sparked something in you, you began to feel a wet line run down from your tear duct. You didn’t know the exact reason for your crying, but all your life you had been known to just break down at random times. Am I okay? You asked yourself mentally even though nothing was wrong. It was like a feeling that you were missing something, but you didn’t know what exactly. 

“U-uh I’m sorry. Have I done something to frighten you?” She asked thinking it was her fault. “I don’t quite understand humans, but if there’s anything I can help with I will do so immediately. I will even cease the thunders tonight so you can have a good rest.” She tried to think of any solution, but nothing sounded right to you. Oh Archons, you felt guilty even worrying her.

She didn’t even care you were in public and the eyes of those passing were glancing at you. Even if she did not care, you did. Not for yourself though, but because it would possibly be damaging to her already demeriting reputation among her people. “I’m sorry Ei. hic, I didn’t mean to soil this evening for you,” You said, hiccups accompanying your sentence.

She ignored your apology, not concerned with any silly trivial human expectations of her. If she remembered correctly Yae Miko had introduced her to a wonderful restaurant that served some delicious sakura mochi. “Perhaps we can go eat at this place I was introduced to. I know they will certainly serve something that you’ll fancy there.”

• Admittedly, Beidou wouldn’t know how to react at first. She’ll stumble over all her words and would be a mess. But overall she’s super understanding, she was like a mother to anybody. Even if you tried to hide yourself during your mental breakdowns she’ll actively search you out and check up on you to make sure you’re okay. 

• Beidou will do whatever she can to cheer you up, even forcing the entire crew to put on a little puppet show for you. Since she’s good at strategizing in battle, she’s undoubtedly good at strategizing to cheer you up. Hell, she’ll even port at the nearest village to cheer you up.

You don’t even fully remember what triggered you, you just remember being fine one moment and suddenly breaking down on the main deck the next. “Huh?” you mumbled. Your cheeks glazed up in heat, and your nose started to run. It didn’t take long for the crew to take notice. Some stared in concern, some asked if you were okay, others ran to go fetch Beidou from wherever she was.

Emerging from the cockpit of the Crux, Beidou shoved her way through the crowd. “Give her some space, move, move!” she pushed. When she made it to you her tone was less stern and laced with anxiety. “Are you okay? What happened?”

“I-I’m sorry, I don’t know why I’m crying,” you sobbed in your hands, trying to clear all the tears streaming down your face. She rubbed your upper back and lowered to your level to connect with you more emotionally. When she realized she couldn’t calm you down in broad daylight she looked up and around for a private room where you could relax.

“It’s alright love, everybody needs to cry every once in a while,” she said once she had figured out a perfect area. She helped guide you to an empty room, eyeing one of her lackeys to prevent entry. She helped you down on a wooden chair, kneeling to stare you in the eyes. You tried covering your crying face in embarrassment.

“Don’t hide your pretty face,” she begged softly. “Listen I’m the captain of this ship, anything I say goes. If you need anything I will make it happen at this moment. All you have to do is say the words.” As sweet as the offer was, you couldn’t take advantage of Beidou like that. You shook your head calming down from just the sight of her maroon-colored eyes reading you like a book.

• Jean was often too busy to pay any attention to you. She usually lets you do your own thing. But when you were having a mental breakdown she would do whatever she could to cheer you up. She’d be a bit awkward with it at first however.

• Jean will take a break for as long as it takes to cheer you up. She’s even taken notes from Lisa on good coffee places, areas to eat, and fun activities within Mondstadt. She’ll probably end up enjoying it more than you since she’s been worked half to death.

You had convinced Jean to join you at Good Hunter for some lunch, you noticed her eyebags get heavier and heavier each passing day. It saddened you to see your girlfriend work herself to the bone every day. She only gave and never took from Mondstadt, such loyalty and devotion. Something must’ve washed over you from your thoughts as you felt tears drip down your face.

Jean stared at you from across the circular table, her mouth wide hesitating to take another bite of her food at the sight of you crying. “Is something wrong honey?” She asked dropping her fork. She grabbed your hand, trying to look you in the eye but you covered your face. 

You cried because you pitied your girlfriend, and here you are trying to help her relax, only to backfire and cause her more stress. Stupid, you thought. It made you ache even more. Thinking you weren’t fit to stand by Jean’s side if you were this mentally weak in comparison to her. She deserved someone better. All these invasive thoughts swarmed your head making you cry even more.

When you didn’t reply, Jean stuttered not knowing what to do. Her hands waving up and down in a panic just watching you break down. Her goofy movements made you giggle a little bit, taking your mind off of things. Watching you be in a better mood automatically calmed her down. “Good, I was afraid my words weren’t reaching you.”

You still had some tears fall, but not nearly at the same rate. “Anyway, are you okay?” She asked, you could almost get lost in her motherly words. Every once and a while you got a sneak peek at why Jean was selected as Acting Grand Master, and this was one of those moments. Her aura just emulated peace and strength. “We should go home, I don’t mind. I don’t need anything fancy anyway, your happiness is first and foremost.”

• Lisa might be the esteemed librarian of the Knights of Favonius, but she was god awfully lazy. She’ll always have free time for you and invite you to the library for her tea breaks just to make sure you were okay and not feeling too lonely. She knew how quickly you could go from okay to a crying mess.

• Lisa will provide you with anything you needed in order to cheer you up. You want coffee? Delivered just how you like it. You want to see some puppies? She’ll take you to a local shelter. You want some sort of food? She’ll take you there.

You were in the library reading on a small wooden stool next to Lisa. You were enjoying the book in your hands so far, after all, Lisa had recommended it to you. But out of nowhere you felt tears stream down your face. Your mental state went from happy to sad in almost an instant. You weren’t even at a sad chapter yet. 

Lisa must’ve heard your muffled cries as she looked wide-eyed in your direction to only be greeted by your crying face. She let out a loud gasp her hands covering her mouth in surprise. “What’s wrong little one?” She asked in shock. “Did something happen in the book?”

“I’m sorry Lisa, I’m so so sorry,” You panicked, you felt you couldn’t even breathe properly. You feared that she would have a negative reaction, that you had messed everything up. It made you quiver even more than whatever had set you off in the first place.

“Silly why are you even apologizing? You must know I don’t mind when you cry,” Something in her silky-smooth voice must’ve soothed your mind, to make you feel relaxed every time you heard it. “I can help you, but only if you tell me what's wrong?” She looked you straight in the eye, her hand on your shoulder to connect with you better.

You couldn’t reply, because you didn’t even know yourself what was wrong. She must’ve figured by her body language, with a small sigh she gathered her thoughts. “Listen, why don’t I take you to Good Hunter for some lunch? It’s almost time for a break anyway. It’ll be my treat.” You nodded softly, she must’ve put you in some sort of trance to have calmed you down so quickly.