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vminity21 · 1 year

Text

Destined | jjk

Pairing: actor!Jeongguk x female!reader, boyfriend!Taehyung x female!reader, f2l!au, school!au

Word Count: 25,530

Genre: smut, angst, fluff

Warning(s): unrequited love, mega-angst (im sorry), profanity, mention of an accident, dirty talk/jokes, smut, fingering, finger sucking, nipple play, m!dom, slight f!dom, clit play, oral (m + f receive), smutty kissing, probably some nipple play; Rated: 18+

Summary: You have had feelings for Jeon Jeongguk since you laid eyes on him. Through the stages of life he has engulfed your brain in ways you will never understand. His feelings for you bloom but a huge misunderstanding will leave you so broken, you don’t know what else to do other than run. You watch as Jeongguk’s dreams become a reality, and despite your new love interest, you never expected to be reconnected with the man who once captured your heart and is determined to find you again.

{Present Day}

Tears drip in warm trails off your cheeks when the click of the front door signifies the leaving of Taehyung. Admitting you are in love with someone else is already hard enough, but the pain of losing someone whom you thought would understand is more overwhelming than you could have possibly imagined. Conversation involving a famous talk show murmurs in the background, but the volume is not enough to drown out the sniffles now pressing onto the back of your hand while your entire frame shudders. Eventually, you plan to reach out to Tae in hopes of reconciling at least a friendship because it is what he deserves, and his heart is in the right place despite the pain you caused.

It is the face on the television screen that captured your heart for sixteen long years and the roller coaster of emotions encircling your chest tightens, producing a lump at the back of your throat as you swallow roughly. The movie premiere has officially been released, and the world has gone feral for the man seated before the interviewer who has asked questions the entire time as expected. But it was the words that the man said that confirmed what you needed to know, and when you froze with the remote almost slipping from your hand, you knew that you were still in love with him, and your now ex-boyfriend Kim Taehyung could tell in your eyes that there is no turning back.

There was a fight that prompted Taehyung to leave, but he was aware from vague communications that you and the actor in the interview had a history. A long history of almost unrequited love, or so you assumed, to reconnecting in the most unexpected way, but before things could get out of hand this time, you did approach Taehyung in a warning that maybe things weren’t meant to be, but he convinced you to stay because sometimes everybody goes through their spells of doubt. But, when it came to Jeon Jeongguk, there were never any doubts.

It’s him.

It was always him. And, when answering a question involving inspiration as to why Jeongguk chose the career path he is on- the words you had spoken to him back in high school were repeated, and your heart turned with the longing that never dimmed. You love Taehyung, and that was never a lie; he unknowingly helped you through a tremendous heartbreak that ultimately revealed to be a misunderstanding that still leaves you humiliated to reminisce upon. And even now, standing within the living room of your home, you no longer can take it; sauntering to the kitchen table, you scoop up your car keys, slipping on your shoes, there is only one destination in mind. Locking the door behind you, the crisp air of the evening that wafts along your face is a reminder of the tears still wanting to fall, and when your car roars to life, your vision adjusts past the tears, and you turn out of the driveway on a mission.

A mission to find some form of healing.

10 years earlier…

{14}

Sunshine reflects off the bleachers enough to cause your eyes to squint toward your notebook where you sketch enough doodles to realize you have not made a dent in your homework. How can you? The pang of a soccer ball bounces off a shoe into the air- kicked with intense force to cause your wandering eyes to view the anger now contorting the player’s expression. His lips stay in a firm pink line, but the dew from the earlier rain unexpectedly slips him onto his back while cocky laughter reverberates beyond the field. Heart turning with sadness, you remain hidden within your favorite spot, though even from a distance, you can see evidently that his feelings are hurt.

“C’mon, Jeongguk, you can’t make the team!” Kevin, the most raucous bully of the school clutches at his stomach overdramatically while his posse looms behind him. “You can barely make the tennis team! You’re in over your head, man,” and with that, they scurry off, shoving into each other’s shoulders as if they have accomplished the funniest gig when really, the most they have accomplished is the nausea rearing within your stomach. And, as much as you want to take a stand for the boy now swiping at his clothes, you shyly hold back continuing to seem hidden high up on the bleachers where he never seems to notice you exist.

Here is where you wait until your father comes to pick you up; unless it is overwhelmingly crowded, you tend to wander off in the opposite direction. You will hide within the room where the drama club meets to practice their lines. It may be halfway into your first year of high school, but you have successfully memorized every aspect of the school building, and while the memory dissipates, you cuddle your notebook to your chest when you watch the lanky kid spit out sentences of curse words before swinging his arm around in a mimic of punching someone.

Jeongguk is not the only one who has had his fair share of Kevin. It was elementary school when you first became acquainted with the two, and the memory still haunts you at times to this day:

“Piggy! Piggy! You’re a chubby piggy!” Kevin would, for lack of a better term, romantically sing to you, side stepping a full circle around you to where you would feel cornered. At eight years old, you were slightly on the chubby side though by nine years old you slimmed up, but on that particular day at eight years of age, Kevin took his demeaning banter too far pushing you severely to the limit. Jabbing a finger into your face, his snotty nose almost made you hurl on his brand-new sneakers.

“Shut up Kevin!” You warned whilst your stubby digits curled into your palms.

“Make me, four eyes!”

Glaring at him, you wished he would disappear as easily as a magic trick, and your fists remained glued to your sides while you fumed. Your stomach growled above the intense anxiety within your abdomen, and you were livid enough at this kid for interrupting your snack time. Tears gathered when you couldn’t find a swift comeback.

“Hey!” A young voice yelled. “That’s not very nice!”

Turning, you saw a dark-haired boy an inch or two taller than you with puffy, red cheeks and bright, brown eyes whose mouth pulled into a pucker once his eyebrows knitted together. Instinctively your mouth flew open as you gazed at your knight in shining armor.

“I don’t care!” Kevin blasted. “She’s a four-eyed pickle brain!”

That was it.

Slowly, you faced Kevin, the fire burning in your palms had never felt so real and before you could control yourself, you smacked him as hard as you could across his face. Kevin gasped in terror as he tumbled to the ground, crying dramatically once his hand pressed against his reddened cheek. Embarrassment washed over mingled with immense fear when you realized what you had done. Kids had been so busy enjoying their lunches throughout the picnic tables that they hadn’t noticed Kevin’s relentless sobs. Taking a step back, you lifted your hand to your mouth to stifle the triumphant smile wanting to grow at the sudden action. You smacked Kevin! The biggest bully you had ever known. Your palm and fingers were slightly pink from the aftermath and despite your heart ramming along your ribcage, you enjoyed that subtle sense of pride.

“What happened? Kevin, love, what happened?” The teacher ran quickly toward the tear-stained boy, bending down to rub his shoulder in an attempt to comfort. A blush crept its way to your ears as you watched the teacher lift the child to his feet. Already visualizing Kevin pointing an accusing finger toward you, you felt the ground being ripped from beneath your feet.

Kevin stuttered, hardly understanding a word he blubbered, “"She-he sma -ah-acked muh-muh-muh-me.”

“Is this true?” The teacher questioned, quite stunned to think a quiet student as yourself would ever do such a thing, but in the teacher’s defense, she was unaware of the turmoil Kevin continuously put you through. Frozen stiff, your eyes enlarged in evident fear, swallowing the lump in your throat trying to gather words, but had not had the chance to speak when someone unexpectedly spoke up on your behalf.

“I-I did it, Misses Kim.”

Those were not your words.

Those were from the little boy who feigned being ashamed as he locked his hands behind his back, staring at the ground. His bottom lip jutted out to add to the effect and all you could wonder was what this insane boy was doing. His eyes met yours for the first time when he raised his head, let me handle it, he pleaded with you before returning to Miss Kim. “He called me a bad word so I… I hit him.”

“Oh, Jeongguk.” Miss Kim sighed. “I am extremely disappointed in you.”

“Bu-But!” Kevin blurted, but the teacher continued.

“The two of you will have to see the principal. I’ll phone both of your parents as well,” she straightened her frame, leading the two boys toward the school while you remained sticker shocked. Jeongguk, head casted downward, slipped his small hands into his pockets, and to this day, you still could not believe the bravery he had. Jeongguk was your hero in that moment years ago and risked his school record for a girl who was verbally bullied by some petty kid who has nothing better to do than bring others down.

Jeongguk hadn’t known you that well back then and he still took the blame. In fact, that was the day nearly seven years ago when your heart leaped every time you would see him walking the hallways. He and Kevin were let off with a warning by the principal and you hoped that Jeongguk would become your friend after his stunt, but unfortunately, it had never happened and he was switched to a different class, so they could keep him, and Kevin separated to prevent further troubles if any were to happen. And as humiliating as it is to admit it, you remember crying when you discovered he wouldn’t be in your class for the rest of the year which kept you from ever being able to thank him for sticking up for you.

Now at fourteen, you watch him from a distance wishing life would bring him to you as it did when you were eight. Jeongguk, focused, kicks the soccer ball again where it soars into the goal, the net rebounding the ball back onto the ground. He stands in awe, breathing heavily as he bows forward to place his hands on his waist- hair swooping over his eyes, probably annoyed that Kevin isn’t there to witness the success. I believe in you, you want to whisper to the breeze hoping miraculously that your encouragement would reach him, but instead, you bite the corner of your lip nervously. Of course, Kevin is the current star of the soccer and tennis teams, and he is still the jerk you always knew him as. And, since it has been a solid seven years since the incident from elementary school, between the two boys it has been forgotten.

You jump when your phone buzzes harshly against the metal of the bleacher to see it is a text message from your dad of his arrival. From your peripheral vision, Jeongguk’s head shoots up to see you scrambling to compile your books into your backpack, eventually jogging to where your dad typically parks. Praying under your breath, you hope Jeongguk isn’t watching you, or finding you weird for sitting out there alone, or here you go overanalyzing absolutely any situation involving him… Again. Heart thudding in your temples, you hope the lad isn’t embarrassed if he were to think that you happened to witness the situation with Kevin earlier on the field. If only Jeongguk knew how much you want to support him.

Flinging the car door open, you roughly seat yourself inside.

“Whoa there, Kid. Someone’s in a hurry, eh?” Your dad’s deep voice greets you as he chuckles. Exasperation forms into a sigh, so you shut your eyes momentarily.

“Sorry dad, I just want to go home.”

“Alrighty then, but you’re okay though, right?”

“I am.” You promise in a murmur, shifting to face the window where the countryside zips past. Your father always knows when to let you have your time to yourself which is something you have always appreciated. Plus, you haven’t found the courage to talk to him when it comes to the topic involving boys. As protective as your father is, you know better than to bring it up.

Upon the arrival of home, a small house, fit for a family of three is nestled in a quiet suburban area where the neighbors respectfully tend to themselves and there’s hardly any space to run which you happen to not mind. To your pleasant surprise, your mother greets you and your father at the door. The smell of food wafts prompting your mouth to water.

“You’re home early!” You say cheerfully whilst your mom pecks the side of your forehead.

“A lot of staff today, so they sent me home.” She smiles as she turns to finish preparing dinner. Your parents have always been wonderful at conversation which you are highly grateful for, and once dinner is served, you help set the table before taking a seat across from your mother. Your father sits in the chair to your right. Each of you speak on how your days have gone which your parents enjoy hearing things are going well on your end. Though you normally tell your parents everything, especially your whereabouts when you’re hanging out with a friend, one thing they are not aware of is your distant crush on Jeon Jeongguk. At times, you almost confess to your mom, hoping she can give you some advice, but the other factor that comes into play is that you and he aren’t… friends really, just acquaintances which others may find bizarre as to why you are so infatuated with him. But you want nothing more than to be his friend if that’s all it takes.

"So,” your mother’s voice breaks the brief silence, dispersing any thoughts involving Jeongguk. “Now that you are finally in high school, you know, one step closer to being an adult…" She pauses. “Have you been thinking about colleges yet?" Mom stabs at her salad with her fork, the plate clinking beneath each jab. Pausing mid-chew, eyes wide, her question catching you off guard; you can feel your dad's stare as he remains silent.

"Well," you say reaching to take a sip of water. "I mean, it's a little too soon to tell right now… I think. Maybe." Stuttering, you nervously crumple a napkin in your hand.

When an excruciatingly few more minutes, pass with the same awkward silence, your mom chuckles. "I'm just messing with you. I’m not ready for my baby to grow up!"

"Oh, my goodness, mom, you scared me!" You reply in obvious relief noticing your dad's shoulders shake as he tries to contain his laughter. "She had you there for a minute."

When dinner is finished, after some more frilly laughter, you help with the dishes before running to your room. You shut the door behind you in anticipation for the warmth of your bed covers. It doesn’t take long to put on pajamas after brushing your teeth and once your frame tangles into the comforter, you feel better. The memory of the very first day of high school filling your mind until you drift to sleep.

{15}

Summer break always brings a loneliness that you dread especially in sleep when nothing, but the images of Jeongguk’s face haunt you in the sweetest way. How is it that a student, meaning you, counts down the days until they see their crush again? How is it that you actually enjoy being at school because it means Jeon Jeongguk? You get it. It’s not normal. It’s not normal for a teenager to beg for time to pass swiftly just to roam the halls of school again.

When you find yourself entering your first class to begin your second year of high school, your stomach flips immediately which increases your heart rate at the sight of Jeongguk. For the first time since children, you now share a class together which means you will see him up close every day versus a far distance between the bleachers and the field. Refraining from smiling giddily like the maniac you want to say you are, you bow your head as you find a seat to descend into. A seat that rests beside a girl with faded purple strands and kind eyes. She doesn’t seem familiar, so you figure she is new to the school.

Flitting your stare, you see the way a boy with dark hair gazes at the girl before taking his seat. At some point in a span of a few minutes, you learn that his name is Jimin, and her name is Monnie. Something about them makes you smile; it is as if they have a chemistry that is so obvious that even grown adults in established relationships would be envious of the bond they share. If only you could say that about Jeon Jeongguk… But that would require interacting with him. Which then requires bravery. And that is something you do not know how to collect without humiliation following close behind it.

Weeks pass further into the school year. The more you keep your ears alert, you tune into conversation between the new classmates as well as the whispers in the hallways involving them. Park Jimin is not only a fellow classmate of your first subject but started attending the drama club alongside Monnie. It is rumored that Jimin starred in a childhood movie that used to be popular. And if you heard correctly, Monnie was in the movie also which is how the two initially met. Jeongguk, who you have noticed has been adopted into their friend group, smiles widely at the couple and plants himself comfortably into the chair behind Jimin while they giggle about something you didn’t quite catch.

Trying not to gaze too long at the trio, you remember last week Jimin, and Monnie were trying to convince Jeongguk to join the drama club because he always had a passion for acting which is something new that you learned about him. Jeongguk seemed uncomfortable from what you gathered, but your heart bloomed with the hope that he would show up to the scheduled times the club usually meets. Would this be the year that he changes his mind? And why was he so nervous? If acting is his passion, why not give drama club a chance?

It is a typical Monday morning, one you did not anticipate, after organizing your wardrobe in the order of favorite outfits you plan to wear for the week. A strange urge to style your hair and paint on a bit of makeup surprises you, but you woke early enough to make it happen, and you throw on your first favorite outfit of the week. You feel oddly confident in yourself for reasons you haven’t quite figured out. Regardless, you roll with it. Is this a way to see if Jeongguk will notice you for once this morning?

Well, he doesn’t.

Maybe if you busy your mind with something else it will help. So, you do. Doodling along a piece of notebook paper shielded by your binder, you are tempted to write his initials within the hearts you’ve drawn but resist. With your luck, the teacher will catch you and read the drawings in front of the class. Then, your crush will be made known. A crush that he may dismiss or be confused by since neither of you talk. Sometimes, you just wish he simply knew you existed.

Drama Club becomes your primary focus once you near the end of your final class of the day. Mrs. Lee already passed the scripts for Romeo and Juliet last week for everyone to study. Today is the day she will have the students read their parts aloud. When the bell rings, you fumble through your backpack until your fingers grip the side of the play and as the anxiety starts to flutter within your stomach, you gulp.

The walk isn’t far, but your steps halt, tongue mutes, and sweat beads form along the line of your forehead the moment your gaze briefly meets the eyes of Jeon Jeongguk. He’s here!? In drama club? He decided to join after all!? Jimin who happens to be sat beside Jeongguk, nudges his shoulder to show him a funny video on his cellphone which disrupts you from your reverie. Did Jeongguk just catch you looking at him?

Your mouth feels dry at this point, and you hurriedly find a seat four chairs away from him to figure out how to steady your breathing. You thought you were anxious before, but the clammy feel of your palms on top of quivering fingers show that it escalated the moment your eyes met. How can someone have this much of a hold over you unintentionally? None of this makes any sense to you, but there is something about this human being that drives you mad.

Your bag slips to the ground by your side while your eyes glue to the script before you. The words of Mrs. Lee echo in the room once everyone arrives, but you are so muddled you hardly grasp what she is saying. All you know is that you are assigned to be the narrator which is easy for you to find because your part is in italics mostly. And then, you silently breathe a slow sigh of relief when Jeongguk is introduced to everyone by Mrs. Lee, and she assigns him the part of Paris since one of the students originally assigned is out sick.

You feel relief because that means Jeongguk isn’t going to be assigned Romeo. And that is because you aren’t assigned Juliet. The last thing you want is to see him, although acting, face to face with another girl. It would hurt and you don’t have time to be hurt. Even though it is you hurting yourself.

One thing you did happen to observe is how timid Jeongguk became when he was introduced as the new addition to the drama club. Is he really that shy? Or did he seem like he didn’t want anyone to know that he is going to be a part of the club in itself?

Unfortunately, he still gets taunted by Kevin which tears your heart into pieces, but Kevin wouldn’t cause him any hell over this right? Drama club isn’t even embarrassing, so why would Jeongguk be embarrassed? Are his parents against him having a passion to become an actor? Maybe it’s a family thing he is worried about.

You really overthink too much; you scold yourself inwardly.

{16}

College planning becomes the ultimate priority when entering the final year of high school. You even gained a friend in a sweet girl named LenLen whose sleek, black hair is tossed behind her shoulders while she concentrates on the task at hand. Last year happens to be a blur, and you spent the summer hanging out with LenLen, but keeping your secret about Jeongguk buried until you feel it is safe to bring it to life.

Speaking of Jeongguk, he hardly came to drama club all last year until the very end when he became even closer to Jimin and Monnie. They must have done an excellent job encouraging him because he doesn’t want the entire school to know that he loves to act, and it shows, yet he attended much more than you expected the final months of the last semester. What is he so afraid of? You still haven’t figured it out.

Rubbing your fingers along your forehead in exhaustion, jittery nerves bundle at your fingertips as your eyes burn from staring at the computer screen too long. LenLen asked if you would meet her at the library after class to apply for colleges, and she is typing away at the keyboard while you take a mini break.

There is only one college you have your heart set on the second you discovered it over the summer, and the only college you want to attend:

Konkuk University.

It is the top college you can attend to pursue a degree in acting. The constant talk of colleges amongst the teachers have reminded students to start preparing for where they will want to go to begin their dream careers. Your parents have been doing research along with you to colleges you can apply for, but Konkuk seems to be where you want to go. Where you feel, you are destined to go. The excitement of even applying to Konkuk seems to be the only thing on your mind.

Promising LenLen you will save her a seat in the cafeteria, you click off Konkuk’s website, sling your backpack over your shoulder and rush to make it to the lunch line. She arrives around ten minutes later, sitting across from you as your lunch trays almost collide. It’s as if your peripherals pick up her presence, but your pupils do not leave the sight you cannot believe you are seeing.

Jeongguk must have gained a new friend too because there he is entering the cafeteria alongside Kevin and his clique. Whatever Kevin said to impress Jeongguk is beyond you, but who in their right mind would see Kevin as a good guy? He has bullied so many people, yet Jeongguk gave him a chance to redeem himself. Or at least, that is what you are trying to tell yourself. You are stunned by the revelation that you almost miss the statement LenLen makes.

“I see you staring.” She smirks, kicking at your shoe as an equivalent to elbowing you if she wasn’t sitting across from you. You can’t help the way your eyes enlarge in response.

“Wha- what do you mean?”

Winking, “I think you know exactly what I mean.”

Shifting your stare towards Jeongguk, you want to cringe at the thought that somebody has figured out your secret. Or maybe you want to cringe because you have made it way too obvious. You decide to play dumb.

“Wh-who?”

“Kevin, silly! You haven’t stopped staring at him all day!”

Oh, the way your jaw drops so quickly and abruptly. It’s as if you are offended because in all honesty, you are. But LenLen is nowhere near at fault for that. Kevin just has no chance with you even if he is to be the last man on earth.

“Kevin!?” You manage to say with your voice cracking. “You think I’m looking at Kevin!?”

She swiftly examines the group of guys just to shrug. “Well, who are you looking at then?” Looking down at your food, which you have been nibbling on, you quickly start eating it again. LenLen gets the point and doesn't press any further. "Well... Whoever it is, just talk to him!" Though her intentions are genuinely pure, it’s easier said than done. You still haven’t worked up the courage to approach him. It has been years that you have known his existence, yet you haven’t said a word to him to try and introduce him into your world.

Months disappear into time and the one day you miss due to being sick is of course a day where one of your teachers passed out a test. So, guess where you are today? Staying after school to make up a test. Once turned in, Mr. Von leaves in a hurry, but you don’t immediately text your dad to be on his way. Instead, you shuffle through your backpack to find the script for A Midsummer Night's Dream to quickly highlight your lines to give yourself some quiet time.

Hearing footsteps reverberate in the hallway, a chirpy whistle is keeping up with the beat of each step. You keep your focus unbroken and manage tuning out the sounds. You do catch, however, the footsteps passing the open door, halting, to then backpedaling as if the person notices you are in the classroom.

“Hey there!” The deep voice is as happy as the melody he had been whistling, but there is something familiar about the sound of his voice. “Y/N, right?”

“Yes!” You reply faster than you mean to, and once your eyes lift to the figure before you, there is a moment where you want to run, but also a moment that makes the world around you disappear into the depths of your brain cells. Jeon Jeongguk. The person who entered the classroom is Jeon Jeongguk. Holy shit.

What do you say? How do you speak? Where do you begin? How do you begin if there was never a beginning? How do you breathe? How do you blink? How do you stand? How do you walk? How do you act normal? How do you even even?

“I’m Jeongguk,” he offers his hand, and then you must coax yourself to shake it, but even then, you are questioning how you reach your hand forward to slap palms and shake his hand.

“Nice-nice to meet y-you.” You force your biggest smile, but that feels awkward. Amazed, you can’t believe you’re even audible when speaking because your voice is coming out so quiet. You are nervous meaning you’re either going to be too loud or too quiet.

He nods. “You did great today by the way… Playing Titania.” One thing you have gathered about Jeongguk this year so far is that he has become so outgoing compared to previous years of knowing him. He is one of those guys who will talk to just about anybody and knows how to keep a conversation going. If only those were skills, you developed because you just make things plain awkward.

“And you did wonderful playing Oberon.” The blush heats upon your chest and cheeks while you return the compliment. Can your heart pound any harder? Any faster? You figure he is bringing this up in general because Mrs. Lee plans on quizzing everybody on their lines in preparation for the play. Your eyes trail him from the tips of his shoes to the handsome curve of his chin, and you hate the affect he has on you even over a small conversation.

Why is he so attractive?

The silence is smothering, but he holds a soft grin as he turns to lean against a desk behind him. “Thank you.” He murmurs, shoving his slim fingers into his pockets. Why does he seem so distant suddenly? Does this mean you leave? Why leave when you have waited to magically be alone with him for years just to be able to obsessively write in your journal every single detail you remember of sharing your first real conversation with Jeongguk? Goodness, you need help. He’s just a guy. But you know very well that trying to chalk this up as ‘no big deal’ isn��t going to work. Because him standing before you is, indeed, a big ass deal.

Jeongguk clears his throat. “I know this is random, but you seem very passionate about what you do. Have you ever had a dream that you were uncertain about? Like… you knew that it was exactly what you wanted to do, but you were scared maybe… it was too good to be true?”

Looking down for a moment, you know what he is saying. Everyone has experienced this a time or two in their life. Possibly even more. Chasing dreams can be scary, but that’s what makes it rewarding. He's obviously talking about acting. And from the past few months of the drama club, Jeongguk really has it in him. He really can act. Every line he's ever given, he's always shown the right amount of emotion. Each character he's given to portray, he knows exactly what to do and how to depict that character in the most beautiful way. He hardly ever receives criticism from Mrs. Lee, and he receives tons of standing ovations for his outstanding performances from his peers and you know deep down an audience will follow behind in his future.

You can never understand why he's always been so ashamed of his talent. Who cares what anybody thinks? Especially Kevin. Nobody cares about him, nor his thoughts anyway. So, why should Jeongguk? After a second, you realize he's still waiting for you to speak.

Deciding to take this opportunity, you give him some advice. If anything, maybe it will help him. Possibly stick with him for the rest of his life. Now that would be too good to be true. You just need to try. You’re so tired of him being ashamed of the drama club. He should never be ashamed of his talent. Or himself.

"Jeongguk..." Wetting your lips before you continue, you try desperately to gather your words. "Don't ever be afraid of chasing your dreams. You know you can do it, so why are you afraid of what other people think?" He looks at you, lips parted, his brown eyes deeply searching yours. "You know you're good enough to make it. So, go for it. I mean it." You know you’re coming off a little stern, but it's time for him to know the truth about how you feel. Even if it’s only the brim of the whole damn truth. "You are so talented, Jeongguk. I always wish I could perform like you; convey emotion as you do with every character you're given."

He grins shyly, leaning off the desk and reaching over to give you a side hug. "You know, I have never heard you talk this much before!" He pulls away, his eyes never leaving yours. "Thank you. That means so much.”

"Hey.” You murmur softly. Unintentionally yet boldly, you pinch his chin gently between your fingertips to keep his gaze from faltering. “Don't be afraid anymore, Jeongguk. Okay?”

Sincerity fills his eyes as you give him a terse nod. Knowing your dad is probably waiting for you outside at this point since it has been too long for you to not text him, you collect your bag and duck out of the classroom, your heart still pounding as if you just ran a marathon.

Either way, you’re thankful. Giddy, even. That's the first time you and Jeongguk have held a conversation, and that's the very first time you've ever told him what you think of him and his many talents. The only thing you left out was the never-ending crush you've had on him because now is not the time to reveal something that most likely wouldn’t make any sense to him. Sometimes, you don’t fully understand how deep your feelings for him go.

And that is okay with you.

The Friendship Phase

{17}

Familiarity in the form of heated bleachers against the skin of the bottoms of your legs bring a subtle comfort while your eyes scan the pages of the book assigned in literature class. With only a few months away from graduation, there is also the spring play to look forward to in a span of a few weeks yet the only thing you can genuinely rejoice about is the newfound friend you have in Jeon Jeongguk.

Yes, you thought that correctly.

You are now friends with Jeon Jeongguk which obviously deepened your feelings stronger than you ever thought possible. Shifting your mind, you scope the endless colorful, sticky notes sticking out of all sides of this book. You have always taken your studies seriously which is something your parents are very proud of, but sometimes you are exhausted.

Sounds of enthusiastic footsteps pounce along the metal bleachers which captures your attention to look up. “Hey, y/n,” your heart melts as Jeongguk’s bunny grin includes a brief wave of his thin hand.

“Hey there.” You coo even though you didn’t mean to coo. Jeongguk plops next to you leaning into you swiftly to then stretching his long legs on the empty bleacher in front of him. “I heard Jimin pranked you earlier.” Jeongguk shudders but in a humorous way at your random statement.

“And they just had the audacity to film the whole thing.”

“You have the best reactions, and you know it.” You can’t help but chuckle with him as he shakes his head. With one hand, he ruffles his bangs, his smile staying intact.

“I’ll get him back.”

“When-”

“Nobody knows. It could be today, tomorrow or Friday the thirteenth.”

Teasingly, you roll your eyes. “Well, I’ll believe it when I see it.”

He elbows the side of your ribs prompting you to snicker at him. After a moment, the silence only lasts shortly while Jeongguk eyes you curiously. “Have you applied to Konkuk, yet?”

You remember the eagerness you felt last night once it was completed and submitted. “Applied last night, have you?”

His dream has also been Konkuk University which you had no idea until months earlier when the friendship blossomed. Acting comes in handy especially at a time like this because hiding feelings from the one person you’ve been infatuated with since elementary school might burn the chance of him staying in your life. If a friendship is all he wants from you, then a friendship from you he will have no matter the pain.

“Of course!” Jeongguk’s enthusiasm shows in his voice as he stares out onto the soccer field and the bright, blue sky. “We will have to celebrate!”

Smiling, you shake your head at his optimism with the hope for this dream to come true remaining. “Jeongguk, I don’t even know if I’ve been accepted, yet!”

“I have no doubt,” he reaches over and pats your shoulder, inwardly making your heart skip a beat. It’s then the familiar buzz of your phone reminds you of your father’s arrival to pick you up and though you love your father, it takes everything in you not to groan. If you could sit here with Jeongguk forever, you would.

“Thank you, Guk.” You say, nudging his shoulder with your own as you move to stand to your feet. His eyes always show a serenity when you use the nickname you gave him. It happened randomly but also naturally as if he has been your friend longer than he actually has. Jeongguk looks up at you, positioning his head where the sun isn’t shining in his eyes.

“What are you doing later?” You wonder, hugging your binder to your chest after slinging your bookbag over your shoulder.

“I’m practicing dance moves with Jimin and Monnie. There are a few moves they’ve been struggling with, so I offered to help.”

Auditions for the spring musical were a few weeks ago, and already being assigned roles, everyone in the drama club has been practicing nonstop in preparation for the play. Jeongguk stands to his feet leaning backward to stretch. “You can come if you want to,” he insists, standing straighter. “I’d love for you to join.”

Though disappointment fills you (because when do you not want to be with Jeongguk), you remember your mom is planning on cooking dinner tonight, and you need to study not only for a quiz on Friday but study the couple lines you have for the musical as well as the songs of choice. “I can’t tonight, but I’ll catch you tomorrow?”

“I’ll catch you tomorrow.” Guk raises his arms in the air, pulling you into a tight hug. As the both of you sway from side to side, you take in the faint smell of his cologne, his smooth chin resting against your forehead. It takes everything in you not to move to kiss him but then you remember that you’ve never been kissed. Pulling away slightly, you notice the atmosphere change, as if a nervous tension has made its appearance between you two. Slowly lifting your head, you see Jeongguk’s ajar lips first before he swallows. Refraining from scrunching your eyebrows, you have no idea what to make of this moment with his arms still wrapped around you.

Is there more that he wants to say?

Abruptly, as if lightning has struck, Jeongguk presses his lips ever so softly on your reddening cheek. Eyes wide and heart ramming against your sternum, you don’t even have time to react before he sprints off. Your fingertips touch the tingling spot of your cheek and now you will be counting down the minutes until you get to see him again.

The practices for the musical are building excitement for everyone in the drama club. The adrenaline rush of performing in front of a live audience along with the impact of the music when everyone’s voices join in loud harmony; the dance moves growing more in sync with every practice, the pure joy of getting to share this dream with people considered your second family; absolutely all of it gives everyone something to look forward to and you wouldn’t change that for the world.

Turning the page to your wrinkled script, you briefly study the highlighted lines. The air outside has warmed, the cloudy day giving off a strange feeling as you try to focus on the words in front of you.

Instead of pouncing feet, this time the footsteps are slower, heavier, dragging even. Curiosity mingled with concern fills you as you turn to see a quiet Jeon Jeongguk who is eyeing the ground, hands in pockets, pink lips in a straight line, walking to take a seat next to you. Furrowing your eyebrows, you’re surprised at his sudden change in demeanor. You haven’t seen him like this in a while.

This morning he was all smiles and dancing his little jigs down the hallway whenever it was time to go to class. At first, you’re at a loss of what to say, and when Jeongguk, finally meets your gaze, he swallows a lump in his throat.

“Something’s going on with Monnie and Jimin.” He murmurs, concern evident in his features. He scratches at his knee then slips his slim fingers into his pocket. Shock fills you.

“What!?” Replaying the day's events, it’s hard to keep up with Jimin and Monnie during the school day versus seeing them at drama club. Observing Guk, worry remains in his expression.

“Jimin won’t tell me what’s going on, but he’s been upset all day.” He chews the side of his cheek, his eyes zoned out in front of him.

“Have you spoken to Monnie?” Now realizing, the two of them haven’t texted in the group chat in a while, and you beat yourself up for being so oblivious.

Jeongguk shakes his head slowly, meeting your eyes. “She dodges me and Jimin every time we try to catch her attention.” Running a hand through his dark hair, he lets out a long sigh through his nose. All you know is whatever is going on is not good. Jimin and Monnie are crazy about each other whether they will admit it or not.

“What about practice? When’s the last time you all got together for that?” Bringing your hand to your mouth, you can’t help gnawing on your nails, anxiety for your friends rising. Also, Jeongguk has been practicing dance moves with them a lot recently; with Jimin, playing the prince, and Monnie, playing the main fairy, which are the lead roles, practice for them is imperative.

“A few days ago.”

“And everything was fine then?”

“Yeah.” Jeongguk is so quiet that you barely hear him. Your heart breaks, not only for the sadness of this situation. Without thinking, you set your stuff to the side, scooting closer to him, leaning your head against his shoulder. Your heart thumps within you at your sudden gesture, and self-consciously wondering what he may have thought of it. To your surprise he leans his head against yours, his warmth bringing peace after hearing the news about his friends.

Selfishly, you’ve daydreamed about his kiss from the other day, but now you can’t even bring yourself to smile about it giddily as you’ve been. Until Jimin, Monnie and Jeongguk are okay, you aren’t going to feel okay.

Inwardly, you hope everything works out for the two of them. They are beautiful souls made just for each other; and whatever is going on, you hope it doesn’t last forever. Staring at the sky, Jeongguk and you don’t speak, just sit comfortably in the silence. You can’t help but shove the fear aside- the fear of losing him. The past few months have been nothing, but you and him: becoming closer, encouraging each other, dreaming of your futures as well as the mutual excitement of hopefully attending the same college, dancing together, singing at the top of your lungs purposely missing notes, meeting at your favorite spot on the bleachers (your everyday routine) until your dad picks you up; it has been the most magical few months you’ll forever be thankful for. You just can’t imagine the two of you ever losing touch, and you don’t want to.

Still cuddled up on his shoulder, you look down to see how near his hand is to yours. The back of his hand is so close that the desire to intertwine your fingers with his is hard to ignore. Swallowing, the nerves build within you, contemplating on if you should just do it and see what happens, or not do it for the fear of rejection. The second you slightly move your hand even closer to his, your phone buzzes.

Jeongguk lifts his head in response, unaware of your almost gesture, and looks toward your phone. “Is that your dad?”

“Yeah,” you sigh, not in frustration, but more of disappointment only because you’re not ready to leave Jeongguk. Meeting his eyes, he gives you a silly grin.

“Well, I will see you tomorrow. I’ll update you if Jimin tells me what’s up.” Jeongguk stands along with you as you turn to stuff your notes in your bag. “In the meantime, I think I’m going to go kick some ball with Kevin and his friend Shownu. Namjoon and Hoseok may be joining, too.” As soon as you zip your bag up and sling it over your shoulder, Jeongguk wraps you in his arms. It is a tradition, you have noticed, that you both do before you leave to meet with your dad.

“I hope you have fun,” your voice is soft, savoring every second of his embrace. You get one more squeeze, nodding once when you both pull away. “Wait!” You spew the moment Jeongguk starts to turn on a heel. If you can’t hold his hand yet, then you will return his gesture from what feels like forever ago. A gesture the pair of you haven’t talked about… yet. On your tiptoes, your palms greet his shoulders, and you plant the sweetest kiss you can on his cheek. He is just as stunned as you are, but you do not give him time to react.

You jog up the bleachers toward the direction of your dad’s parked car. The ride home goes by fast because your mind is on full blast. Dad and you make small talk, but you don’t remember it because all you can think about is how soft Jeongguk’s skin felt against your lips.

As soon as the car parks in the driveway, you immediately run to the mailbox trying to force a distraction. Because did Jeongguk like it? Will he think you’re crazy? He kissed you so why couldn’t you kiss him back? Is he going to act weird about it tomorrow? Will he say anything?

You dissipate the thoughts by roughly shaking your head and return to the squeaky sound of the lid to the mailbox opening. Ever since applying to Konkuk, it’s been your number one priority to check the mail after school each afternoon. With already anxious fingers, you peek inside the dim, small space. A large, white letter outstands the rest of what you assume is junk mail and the panicky jitters swarm in your stomach.

Reaching for the largest letter, you see your name in bold letters, a smile forming on your lips as excitement fills you. Running your eyes to the corner of the letter, there in the most beautifully typed font reads:

Konkuk University.

When school starts the following morning, you’re all smiles as you tuck the unopened letter in one of your folders and settle it into your backpack. If there’s anyone in the world you want to open this letter with, it’s Jeon Jeongguk. Sitting in the first few classes nearly drives you mad as the nerves build with every second. Not just nerves involving whether you have been accepted into your dream college or not, but nerves from the kisses. They weren’t on the lips, but kissing someone’s cheek is just as much of a big deal, right?

You carefully scan the crowded hallways between each class period, trying to stay alert for any signs of Jimin or Monnie. You texted Monnie last night to check up on her, but she was very concise with her reply, and you knew it was best to let her be until she feels better. Whatever is going on is her business and you never want to pry.

LenLen was also the next person you texted, letting her know you received your letter from Konkuk. She showed her excitement with all caps and exclamation points leaving you a wide smile before you fell asleep. Despite the college excitement, you also scribbled in your journal about the events with Jeongguk because you wanted to remember that moment for eternity.

Now, nearing the end of the school day, the sun is shining high in the sky as you cling onto the strap of your backpack that seems to live on your shoulder. Heading in the direction of the bleachers to the soccer field, you hear the familiar joyful voice of Jeongguk.

“Y/N! Y/N!” He shouts, and before you can fully turn around, he lifts you in the air and twirls you around in his embrace. You laugh hysterically, watching as he does a little ditty, shuffling his feet in one of his infamous robotic dance moves after setting you down. As soon as he finishes, he rests his hands on your shoulders. “I got accepted! Konkuk accepted me! I am going to Konkuk University!”

“Oh, Guk!” You shout gleefully, crashing into his arms again while he sways you. “I am so proud of you!”

“Did you get your letter?” He gleams, pulling away from the hug, his hands now lingering on your elbows.

Nervously nodding whilst biting your bottom lip, you turn to unzip your bag, pulling out the folder you kept the letter in. “I haven’t opened it, yet.” You admit. A blush creeps on your cheeks. Confusion clouds Jeongguk’s eyes as he looks at you.

“Oh?”

“I wanted you with me.” Holding his eyes, his lips part then relax into a timid grin. With shaky fingers, you thumb at the flap of the envelope, carefully opening it. Your heart pounds loudly as you gulp. Once you free the letter from its thin package, you unfold it slowly, bringing it to your line of vision.

Taking a moment to find the sentence you need to read, your shoulders go rigid, your fingertips are suddenly ice cold as the whole world around you stops. Tears brim in your eyes, as your heart falls to the ground in shattered glass pieces.

To: [Y/L/N] [Y/F/N],

Thank you for your application into our Acting and Arts program as we are very honored for your consideration of us to pursue your educational career path. We are very sorry and regretful to say that we are not able to accept your admission to Konkuk University at this time…

The words blur before you. Your mouth hangs open, but no words are coming out. Every hope and dream you had for attending Konkuk has disappeared along with the excitement you had been feeling since applying. The emptiness in your chest is smothering you, and the worst part is…

“Y/N?” Jeongguk steps forward, worry all over his face as his gentle voice brings you back to the present. Realizing you haven’t said a word, your eyes shoot to meet his.

The even worse of the worst part is, the one person who has finally entered your life; the one person who you dreamed of being by your side through college and hopefully further in life; the one person who you’ve been inseparable with for a short span of time, will be far away. Konkuk is about five hours away from your town, and just the thought of hardly getting to see Jeongguk destroys you.

Tears spill onto your cheeks. You have no words. Bringing a shaky hand to your face, you run. The letter sways in the wind behind you as you choke back a fit of sobs. Guk’s voice calls your name, but it fades in the distance. You run elsewhere. Anywhere that is not you and Jeongguk’s favorite spot; any place where you will not be found.

At least, not until your father picks you up from school.

Devastation overwhelms you as the tears continuously soak your cheeks. All your hopes were set on Konkuk University. And, for the first time in a long time,

you feel stuck.

The covers of your bed have never felt so welcoming as you cuddle further under the comforter. The empty feeling in your chest is prominent as you try to shove the earlier humiliation from your mind. Squeezing the bridge of your nose, heavy footsteps catch your attention.

“Hey…” The deep voice of your dad sounds as he cracks the door open. With red, puffy eyes, you look at him, his sad face showing pity. “Mom and I are heading out to visit your grandma.” It looks as if he wants to invite you to come but knowing the information you received today along with your sloppy appearance, he decides against it. “Just wanted you to know that your mom and I are proud of you. Always. Don’t let this end your hope.” Blinking back tears, you force a grin at your dad’s words. “There’s always an answer. Konkuk just happened to not be it.”

Nodding, a tear slides down your cheek while your dad continues. “Don’t give up, y/n. We believe in you.”

Thanking him hoarsely, your dad gives a nod, closing the door behind him. Minutes drag, and you decide to brush your teeth to rid of the sour taste in your mouth and prepare for bed early. Maybe sleeping will help you escape this misery for a while. Once you’re freshened up, you throw on a pair of yoga pants and a loose T-shirt refusing to look in the mirror at your appearance and trying to enjoy the freedom of not wearing a bra. As you make your way to your bed again, you lift the blankets when the sound of the doorbell makes you jump.

Heart thudding lightly, your eyebrows furrow, sniffing back the excess mucus clogging your nose. Your parents haven’t been gone that long and if they had forgotten something, they would have texted you first. Making your way to the door, you open it. Your eyes enlarge in astonishment when you see Jeon Jeongguk, lips parted, staring into your eyes. Embarrassment flushes through you as your cheeks and chest burn. You know you look awful. You also know that you feel awful. Not a good combination, you scold yourself.

“Hello...” He murmurs. His hands bury in the pockets of his blue and yellow jacket. “Can I come in?” He asks after sixty seconds of silence. Speechless, you nod with a forced grin. Jeongguk steps through the front door then you close it behind him. It’s not the first time he has been to your house; he’s been countless times for homework purposes and drama club practices. You just didn’t expect him at your doorstep at this moment right now. You never dreamed he would show up to see you unexpectedly like a movie.

The two of you hold eyes, regret pooling in your heart. Jeongguk’s arms loosen to then step forward, pulling you into a tight hug. Your body trembles against him from the tears brimming in your eyes.

“I’m so sorry.” You whisper. You are not only sad about not being accepted by your dream college, but you are in pure devastation at the thought of losing Jeongguk. The man you have been longing for since you were eight years old. Why is it that when he is finally in your life, a part of your world, that life wants to strip him away from you again?

“No, no…” He says tenderly, his chest so warm pressed against your cheek. “Please don’t be sorry.”

“I just… I just didn’t know what to do.” You sob. Once you both pull away after your minutes of crying subsides, Jeongguk follows you into your room. The both of you sit on your bed, and his knee brushes your thigh as you two shift comfortably facing each other. Silence drowns the room, but only for a few minutes before you speak. “I’m so happy for you.”

Jeongguk glimpses at you from his twiddling hands, his pink lips form into a sweet grin. He looks as if there’s something he wants to say, but decides against it, returning his eyes downward, his fingers move to play with a piece of lint he finds on the comforter.

Awkwardly, you tuck a strand of hair behind your ear and sniff, the emptiness you feel not doing any better. You feel horrible for running off like that; you really are happy for Jeongguk, and you hope he knows that despite your devastation of being rejected by Konkuk. Deep down, you know he’s not angry with you for feeling this way, so why you are overthinking it you don’t know.

“Come here…” He says warmly. Looking up at him in surprise, he moves forward, embracing you once again to you resting into the side of his neck. His warm skin sends those familiar shivers all through your body. How can someone captivate you this much without even knowing it? Without thinking, you whisper.

“I’m going to miss you so much.” Your voice breaks as your chin trembles. “So, so much.”

He moves just enough to meet your eyes again, and his face is so close that you can feel his breath against your chin. Your eyes notice when his lips part, both of you staring without making one sound. You have never been kissed on the lips before, and never in your wildest dreams would you have imagined it to be with Jeon Jeongguk. Butterflies grip you internally as the tip of his nose brushes the side of yours, his eyes closing as you hold your breath.

As smooth as the touch of a flower petal, Jeongguk’s lips press to yours ever so warm and ever so soft making your head spin sporadically. The two of you pull away but only for a second to stare into each other’s eyes, as if he’s asking permission to kiss you again. “You have no idea how long I’ve been wanting to do that.” He smiles so wide; you can hardly conceal the excitement bursting all over your heart that is mending because of him and those words.

The infamous pound of your heart awakes in your temples the second Jeongguk kisses you again. His thumbs stroke your cheeks as your hands grasp his forearms following his lead. As your lips move together, you feel yourself laying back onto the numerous pillows against the bed frame. His body aligns with yours, the material of his jeans thick against your yoga pants. There are no words to describe the happiness igniting within you as you get lost in the feel of his kiss, the way his hair feels between your fingers, the tip of his tongue circling yours, and the way your legs tangle together. This day might have started off in the most horrible way, but Jeongguk knew exactly how to mold that misery into a bliss you never thought you would ever experience.

There are just no words.

His eyes meet yours once more as a beautiful smile spreads upon his face. “I’m going to miss you more.” And with that, he kisses you repeatedly, and you never want this night to end.

Never in a million years.

{18}

The clinking sounds of silverware interspersed with the numerous conversations populate the atmosphere as you rush from table to table refilling drinks or taking orders. It’s hard to focus on the task at hand after being here all day, but you manage to give polite smiles despite the stress of the crowd growing. It’s been several months post high school graduation since you started your full-time job here waitressing, saving up money until you find the right college for you.

Swiftly, wiping your sweaty palms along your apron, you take a quick break to check your phone.

When you have yet to receive a message from Jeongguk, you feel your heart drop in disappointment. Jeongguk left for college a month ago at the end of summer, and though you know his schedule is continuously busy, it’s like him and you have barely been able to speak a word since the two of you said goodbye. Fighting the urge to cry, you set your phone back in your locker and sprint to see if any of your customers’ food is ready.

The job continues to keep your mind busy enough to dismiss the sadness from checking your phone a bit ago, but not busy enough from the memories of your friends. You’ve never missed your friends so much; almost seeing them every single day to never seeing them at all took a toll on you, especially when Jeongguk left.

The final days of your senior year were eventful other than the suffocating exams that consumed everyone’s time studying. LenLen and Jeongguk were the only two who kept you sane through the horrendous time; and now, after finishing the final exam, you make your way toward the front doors of the school, stopping dead in your tracks. Jimin and Monnie are standing a good distance apart; Monnie hugging a binder to her chest, her stiff shoulders apparent as her and Jimin never break eye contact.

“Hey, y/n.” Guk’s voice echoes. When you turn to him with nervous eyes, he looks out the glass doors to realize why you’re silent.

“Oh, shit.” He whispers, grabbing your arm and pulling you to a corner to where you both couldn’t be seen easily. Heart-shattering, you watch as Monnie mouths something to Jimin, even from where you’re standing, you can see tears glistening in both of their eyes. Jimin looks down for a moment, returning his eyes to her, mouthing something in her direction as well. As if the moment was lost, Monnie rushes to a car that pulls up, and you assume it’s one of her parents coming to pick her up.

A memory floods your mind from the previous week, when Monnie, with sad eyes, told you the news that nearly broke you.

“I’m moving back home.” She whispered. Shock overwhelmed you at her statement, being her home is basically a plane trip away.

“What?” Stunned, a tear spilled onto your cheek. “Monnie, no-” you remembered the night the spring musical ended, Monnie left immediately afterward without a word to anyone. Jimin, depression evident in his countenance, leaned on Jeongguk for strength as the mystery of Jimin and Monnie remained. They never told anyone what happened, and if they had it was very vague.

“I know.” She said, looking down to avoid you seeing her cry. Enveloping her in a tight hug, you held her close as she broke into silent sobs, and you refused to let her go until she was ready.

A warm hand intertwined with yours, the memory slips away as you watch Jimin disappear around the corner of the school.

“Do you think it’s because she’s moving?” You murmur. Meeting Guk’s eyes, the both of you share a knowing look of worry, wishing there was something you could do to reunite the couple you two weren’t sure you would ever see again.

“I don’t- I don’t know.” He says softly, wrapping his arm around your waist for comfort.

The memory fades into the evening along with your will to smile. Thankfully, the second closing comes around, you quickly help wipe down tables, tidy up the chairs, and wash dishes before you gather your purse and phone. Refusing to look at your phone screen, you wait for the arrival of your mother to pick you up, wishing you were brave enough to get your license. Although, as soon as you settle in the passenger side, your mom and you make small talk until you both make it to the house.

Running to shower, afterwards, you freshen up with a pair of clean pajamas, soon settling into your room for the evening. Your legs are sore from standing all day. As if on an impulse, your fingers tap along the phone screen and before you know it, you’re dialing Jeongguk’s number. After the long day you’ve had, your heart yearns to hear his sweet laugh, hoping maybe it can bring some healing before you fall asleep for the night.

Chewing on your fingernails, the anxiety rising beneath your chest surprises you. Why are you so nervous? It’s not like you and him are strangers. Before you can scold yourself any further, the sound of his voice snaps you out of your thoughts.

“Hey.” Jeongguk’s voice sounds frantic once he answers on the fourth or fifth ring. Taking note of his heavy breathing, you wonder if he just came back from dance practice, or maybe he went for a jog.

“Hey.” A grin fills your face just at the relief of finally hearing him after what felt like so long. It has been a while since you and Jeongguk have spoken over the phone, and it’s hard ignoring how much you have missed him since his leaving for Konkuk.

“Hey, y/n, I’m so sorry but I can’t talk right now.”

A strange feeling overwhelms you as disappointment knocks on your heart. “Guk, is everything okay? I just feel like we haven’t talked in so long and it’s starting to worry me. I just, I-”

“I know, and really I’m so sorry, I promise I will explain everything later but right now, Jin and I are rushing to the hospital-”

“Wha-?” Shock engulfs you, and you can feel your voice thicken with fear.

“One of our friends just got in an accident.”

Your heart had stopped at his words and your whole body went numb. It’s been a few days, and still Jeongguk’s words have echoed in your mind continually. Swiftly, you asked Jeongguk to update you on everything before the two of you hung up. Of course, he promised, but even now, still waiting, you have yet to hear from him.

Sighing in utter frustration, mostly to yourself for being so selfish, you collapse onto your parade of pillows, pulling up your Facebook app. Just the thought of someone getting hurt tore you up completely. It’s one of those situations where you wish with all your heart and soul that you could help and save somebody from their storms. Then during the healing process, prove to them that they are not alone, and that you will do everything in your power to help them find an escape from their torments.

Turning on your side, you try to ignore the uneasy feeling at the pit of your stomach. You wish misery wasn’t a thing; especially right now, with worry racking your whole brain with everything being unknown. You have no idea if Jeongguk’s friend is okay, and you also don’t know if Jeongguk and his friend Jin are okay, and overall, you think that’s what’s driving you insane the most. How can you be okay if you have no idea if anyone you know is alright?

Scrolling through your Facebook timeline, you try to distract yourself from the inner turmoil of fear threatening to consume you. As if this week couldn’t get any worse, what catches your eye next causes you to sit up. In the picture sits a group of people, all tagged from what looks to be a middle-aged woman who you assume is somebody’s mother, and as your eyes linger over their faces, you pause at the young girl who is smiling contently with Jeongguk’s arm wrapped around her shoulders.

Jeongguk’s arm wrapped around her shoulders.

Blinking back tears, you take in his dimpled grin expression, the one you had fallen in love with over and over again; realization plagues you and now everything makes sense as to why you haven’t heard from him as much. Clicking off Facebook, you decide to deactivate your account as well as the many other social media accounts you have that Jeongguk follows. You don’t even hesitate to block his number. Jeongguk has moved on, and even though you don’t want to accept it, you must. Slinging your phone toward the end of the bed, you bury your face into the comforter letting the thick material muffle the wails as warm tears stream down your face.

{22}

Do people truly move on from a broken heart? Or do they suppress the situation so far in the back of their mind that they eventually numb themselves from the pain of the devastation? Either one could be you, but you haven’t given it much thought in four long years. More like forced yourself not to think about it.

Twirling the cold beverage in your hand, the evident taste of beer pools on your tongue once you take a slow sip. You do not necessarily care for alcoholic beverages, but this brewery in downtown has been a nice place to frequent on lonely Friday nights. A few stragglers take a seat at the bar while the bar tenders’ breeze back and forth to prepare the orders.

You never went to college. Almost did, but you couldn’t shake the feeling that it wasn’t the right thing to do at the time. However, you found a job opportunity to become a prop organizer for sets. Did you go for it? You did, training under a family friend, but held the bitterness of not attending your dream college, so you decided to work on multiple television sets for a couple years until you changed career paths. Instead, you applied for a banking job. You have your own desk at least and a set schedule. You also always have weekends off and the pay is somewhat decent.

Are you happy at the job? Not really but are you content with the job? To an extent. LenLen shoots a brief text with a picture of a meme that makes you smirk to yourself. You are grateful that you have maintained a wonderful friendship with this angelic human being. If it wasn’t for her then you would have never gotten over… Him. But as one may question, have you really gotten over him? You have made it clear to your parents, you didn’t move on because you wanted to, it’s because you had to. He found someone else. You finally accepted that you merely weren’t enough for him. LenLen argues that you should have communicated with him to be sure, but you disagree.

Regardless, you refuse to say his name, or create any social media that puts you at risk from seeing something that will rehash the day you discovered he had someone else. The only human being you have kept up with is Monnie from her movie premieres. She has become a highly known actress since you last saw her in high school- a super successful actress in her career. Subconsciously, you wonder if Monnie was ever able to rekindle her relationship with Jimin now that they are adults, but for now, you cheer Monnie on from the sidelines. She deserves her fame, and you will forever be so proud of her.

LenLen still harps about how cool it is that the pair of you attended school with a celebrity. And you definitely agree. You also hope Monnie’s heart has been mended the way you wish yours would. What is it about losing someone special that can take away so much of you? Sometimes you regret letting the initial pain from four years ago haunt you still. Why can’t you just forget about him entirely?

Your stomach gurgles momentarily to remind you that you need to eat something before you get buzzed. Unfortunately, you aren’t a fan of the food at the brewery, so you plan to run by a drive thru when you decide to head home.

The slide of a full glass of beer captures your attention when the lean fit frame of an individual carefully takes a seat beside you. Do you turn to look? Is it appropriate to stare? Your shoulders tense especially when you smell the crisp scent of cologne. You could smack yourself too because it smells delightful.

You’ve dated here and there, but they were never good enough. LenLen blames it on your past heartbreak, but you assure her that is not the case. At least, you wish it wasn’t the case but here you are. Whoever this person is, smoothly leaning on his elbow to face you, is entering dangerous territory if he is going to smell this enticing.

“Waiting on anyone?” His voice is like velvet when he speaks, and you shift in the stool to eye him curiously. Your heart skips a sudden beat, and you have to fight every fiber of your being to put on your best acting skills.

Black strands are tousled though few are wisping at the corners of his brown irises. An amused gaze stays in his expression and along the smooth, pale skin of his face tilts a gentle smirk with pink lips. He is the most beautiful, exquisite man you have seen in a while. And he chose to plant his rump next to you. Great.

“I’m not.” You timidly bite your bottom lip because what else are you supposed to do? You already want to hide from the heated blush running along your chest, but you remain rooted in your seat.

Relief shows in the form of his dropping shoulders as he breathes a swift sigh. “Good because I’m not as tough as I was trying to look.”

“Nonsense!” You giggle profusely, seeing the way his smile grows into one of comfort.

“No, really. I’m not one to fight, but I was going to throw some hands at any man if it means at least getting your name. Taehyung,” his smile stays intact as he offers his hand. Feeling the warmth of his palm, you are embarrassed when you notice yours is clammy, but Taehyung doesn’t seem to mind.

“Y/N,” you say softly, having a hard time taking your eyes off him.

He seems as though he wants to say something, but he’s so entranced by you that he clears his throat awkwardly instead. “What brings you here alone on a Friday night?” Taehyung takes a sip of his beer.

Shrugging your shoulders, you realize your hand is tightly gripping your glass from the nerves. “Honestly… I don’t know. It’s just a place for me to escape to for a while.”

“Do you… Give me permission to join you? Sometimes escaping is fun if you have a partner in crime.” Hope resonates in his eyes at the question and there’s something about him that you can’t shake. Is this a coincidence? Or is this fate? Will he be the one to mend your heart into what it should be? You aren’t sure, but you will gladly find out.

“Of course,” you smile, and that became the beginning of a new love story. Or so you hope.

{23}

The time we all have been waiting for

One year ago, you met your boyfriend, Taehyung, and one year ago is when you experienced a high you have missed. He was your first everything aside from kissing, and once intimacy became comfortable, it then became addicting. You did learn after a month of courting, that Taehyung had gone through a horrible break up leading to the night you both first met. As much as you would love to admit that you relate to him, you don’t. You want to keep your former love buried deep in the crevices of your mind, so your heart can breathe.

What really piqued your interest in Taehyung was discovering he is a cameraman for movies galore. How crazy is that? You have always wanted a career related to film and acting and here you are dating a cameraman. A successful one at that. His father happens to be a well-known director so part of that has contributed to his career, but you have enjoyed the sets you secretly have gotten to visit whether the movie makes it to the big screen or not.

There’s just… something missing. You cannot seem to pinpoint exactly what it is that’s missing. But something just isn’t there. The guilt eats you alive somedays, but Taehyung has been a dedicated lover and friend, so why ruin what is a decent relationship?

“I’ll be back tomorrow, and by then, I should have more information on where my next job is located.” Taehyung reaches to hold you then plants a soft kiss to your lips. “Behave.”

Snickering, you shove him. “I can’t promise I won’t fuck something up. The cookie jar was just meant to fall off the counter.”

“Pushed.” He corrects.

“Accidentally.”

Taehyung shakes his head teasingly at you while his fingers move to grip your hips. “I want everything intact when I get back, okay?”

“Roger that.” You nod once, letting the next kiss linger. The tip of his tongue greets yours which prompts you to moan.

“I’ll miss you.” He whispers.

“I’ll miss you, too. Let me know when you land.”

You hate the loneliness you feel when Taehyung leaves to travel to his job locations. But you know he must. The pair of you moved in together four months after dating which you know is a bit fast, but he had been so good to you that you couldn’t help but rush it. It’s as if you were chasing a spark, you hoped would remain, but never truly found it. But nobody has to know that but you. You always liked his company because he always stayed so peaceful. You assume that his presence not being in the house makes you feel you might succumb into the sadness you experienced so long ago.

The second Taehyung calls the next morning, you can’t believe the exhilarating news he shares. “Do you remember the girl you went to school with that became an actress?”

Your breathing hitches. “Monnie?”

“That’s the one!” Taehyung beams to the point that you can tell he’s smiling on the other end of the line. “She’s starring in the movie I was hired to help film!”

“Are you serious!? Goodness, it’s been years since I’ve seen her!”

“Well about that...” Taehyung hints, and you steady your excitement.

“Yes? Come on, spit it out!”

“So, they’re doing a table reading of the script while the rest of us crew prepares the sets. And I may or may not have bought you a plane ticket, so you and her can catch up.”

“No way!” You screech. “You mean it? I’m really going to see her!? Oh God, what if she doesn’t remember me?”

Taehyung’s laugh reverberates through the phone. “Of course, she remembers you, and she’d love to see you again. It was her idea to fly you out here!”

“Oh, you tell her thank you so much! …Am I on speaker?” You lower your voice.

“… No?”

“You’re going to get you some of that goody good the second the plane lands you best believe. I’ll even wear a thong.”

Taehyung’s chuckle darkens with lust. “I’ll be ready. I love you.”

“Love you.” You nearly scream, jumping on your bed in happiness. You get to reconnect with an old friend, and maybe being with Taehyung for a bit will strengthen the hope that there shouldn’t be any doubt about this relationship. Scurrying to your closet, you throw all your clothes down to figure out what you’re going to wear and what you’re going to pack.

If only you knew who else was going to be there the moment you arrive.

You’re exhausted by the time the flight ends, but you happily greet your boyfriend who smiles widely at your presence. “There you are.” He coos, pinching your chin before planting a sweet kiss.

“I need some caffeine.” You say, kissing him one more time. “Has the table reading started?”

“It has, but as long as traffic is fine, we may make it on time.”

Throwing your duffel in the back of the rental car, you shuffle to the passenger side letting Taehyung rest his large hand on your thigh. Why aren’t you as excited to see him as you hoped you would be? In all honesty, you’re more excited to see Monnie more than your own boyfriend.

“Hopefully me and Monnie can reschedule if we end up late.” You are disappointed, but it is also not your fault that your flight was delayed by two hours. Taehyung squeezes your thigh while your eyes gaze at the scenery passing by. Taehyung offers to grab you a coffee, but you decline in hopes it will get you to Monnie faster.

Once the car is parked, you, hand in hand with Taehyung, enter the facility and you halt unintentionally when you see a frantic Park Jimin running after who you see to be Monnie who is keeping her gaze downward. Your eyes widen in elation. Have they been in contact this whole time? Then… Why do they look so worried?

You squeeze Taehyung’s hand and whisper, him leaning closer so he can hear you. “I think it’s safe to say that we’re rescheduling.” Taehyung sees the scene as the couple in the distance disappear around a corner and he mouths an ‘Oh.’

“I’ll show you around, then.” He clears his throat, and he unintentionally drops your hand when the pair of you round a corner into where a large table with numerous chairs sits. Few sparse, bundles of people are sharing conversation that echoes throughout the building and when someone starts greeting Taehyung, your eyes scan the room until they stop on an individual whose coffee cup drops right out of his hand in pure, debilitating astonishment.

His shoulders shudder in embarrassment, but your heart is racing so fast, you are not sure if you are breathing. How is this possible? How is this real? Someone with blue hair beside him rushes to clean the mess, but you can’t run because your boyfriend is only a few inches from you, yet you back away slowly to try and calm yourself. You feel lightheaded as if you are in a torturous dream, especially when you catch his eyes again that are equally enlarged with disbelief.

“J- Jeongguk?”

7 years earlier…

Jeongguk smiles triumphantly at the director of the college who unfortunately sent your letter of acceptance to the wrong individual who happened to share the same name as you. Jeongguk couldn’t be more thankful to solve this mistake, and to celebrate, he has been working two part time jobs on top of juggling his college classes to save up money to purchase a necklace he has been dying to get you since he moved to Konkuk University.

He knew something wasn’t right that you didn’t get accepted into Konkuk when your grades should have reflected how hard working of a student you are. Secretly, he made it a pact to get to the bottom of it, and now that he has, he cannot wait to share this news with you. You can either start classes this coming spring or start completely the following year and Jeongguk will remain by you every waking moment. Even if it’s mostly over phone for now.

He misses you more than words can say, and the exhaustion that plagues him continually is no help on the nights he’d rather stay up talking to you. He does feel guilty on the other hand that he hardly has been able to text much due to his doting schedule. Seokjin, a friend he gained, who has been a much better colleague than Kevin, greets him at the library where they plan to study.

Jeongguk has made acquaintances too, one being a guy with blue hair named Yoongi and the other being a girl named Sun Hee who Jeongguk believes is Yoongi’s girlfriend from the way they interact. What Jeongguk didn’t expect after gradually introducing the small group in his life is the accident that ensues that leaves Yoongi injured and in the hospital.

Of course, you had called right when he finds out the terrifying news that leaves him and a frantic Seokjin scurrying to the car to make it to the hospital. He plans to call you to tell you everything at some point but as the days continue, the nerves involving Yoongi get worse and Jeongguk can hardly focus on anything else but his friend. If anything, he wishes he has you to hold, but he knows it would be impossible for you to make it the five hours to him when you don’t have your license yet. Nor does he want to interrupt your job. Or, upset your dad.

Many students who either have classes with Yoongi, family, or friends of Yoongi’s visit him as he recovers which thankfully has been good news. At one point, Jeongguk walks over to comfort Sun Hee who is still trying to get past the emotional distress of it all, so he wraps a friendly arm around her shoulder before Yoongi’s mom proudly asks everyone to take a picture. Yoongi’s mom wants her son to remember the endless support he has no matter what and Jeongguk grins as the camera flashes before him and Seokjin head back to the dorms to rest.

What Jeongguk doesn’t anticipate is the fact none of his messages deliver when he goes to text you. Heart pounding anxiously, he attempts to call but nothing goes through. But… Why? Of course, he goes to check social media to see you are nowhere to be found, and the confusion muddling his mind is no help. Did you block him?

Seokjin consoles Jeongguk while he scrambles around the room wondering what to do in order to think thoroughly about it all. Did you find someone else? Why did you cut him off? How is he going to tell you about the good news with Konkuk? Seokjin offers for Jeongguk to use his phone, but Jeongguk is scared you would mistake Jin’s number for a scam caller since you obviously do not have Seokjin’s phone number. The pain hovers in his chest while he fights the tears. Was it because he didn’t get a chance to talk to you much?

Jeongguk, months later, pays a visit to your home with hope to see you again, feel your embrace one more time, but is greeted by your dad who lets him know that you are working at a different location and isn’t sure when you will be back. Your father never told you because he knew exactly what you would do, so it’s a secret he keeps safe since he is the one who saw your heart shattered over the boy he is staring back at.

Jeongguk apologizes then visits his parents for a few more days before returning to Konkuk. At this point, the necklace dangles before him once he is in the security of his dorm and tears of guilt drip onto the bed covers. If only he knew how to find you again, he would do anything. For now, he will try and accept that maybe he wasn’t enough for you after all.

{23}

You kept him for years in your every thought, every word you wrote and every pound of your heart. Dancing eyes that glued to your soul the moment he kissed you, and touches as gentle as flower petals loomed all over your skin. His smile haunted you even in times that you begged for it not to and why you are saying this in all past tense is just you trying to hide the truth. He still does. He still resonates with you even as if he never tore your heart to shreds.

You haven’t seen him in almost seven years, yet his memory burns alive as if you physically relive the memories every day. As if his touch is as fresh as it had been the first time, he ever held you in his arms. Why must life be so cruel? To toy with you as if he is ultimately meant to be your forever just to take him away from you repeatedly.

You didn’t give him a chance the last time. You made the choice for him because he found someone else. Why couldn’t he just be yours? Why was he there when you least expected it? Now, every feeling you’ve tried to hide is igniting into the present.

You stand there frozen for a timeless eternity locking eyes with the one man you never thought you would see again. He is just as stunned. You can see it in his eyes and from the way his Adam’s apple bobs at the gulp he swallows. You can tell by the scripts on the table right in front of Jeongguk that he must be casted in this movie, and all you can think through your catapulting thoughts is that you would have found Jeongguk much earlier if you hadn’t run late to the table reading. After all this time, and from the memories of high school, it is clear Jeongguk has finally chosen to follow his dreams, and that, despite the turmoil hounding your chest, you feel a pang of warmth at the realization.

In your peripherals, you remember a very important detail suddenly. What about Taehyung? Instead of turning, your auditory senses pick up your boyfriend still having a conversation with who you assume is a coworker. He has no idea about the stare down going on behind him.

Now, you know why Monnie ran. She didn’t expect to see Jimin here either. Is this the place where love reconnects? Or was your original thought, correct? Is fate just messing with you? Why now? Why couldn’t you be single right now, so this guilt rising in your chest didn’t exist? Why should you feel guilty though? Nothing has happened other than the immense wave of emotions plaguing your entire system. Would that have something to do with it? Holy fuck.

You do not know how you survive the day avoiding Jeongguk the way you do, and Taehyung is starting to get worried about how frantic you appear as if you want to run. Safely getting to the hotel that evening, you don’t even remember how to do your typical evening routine. With how nauseous you feel, you nibble on your dinner trying to assure Taehyung that you are fine.

The second day at the set, Jeongguk could not take his eyes off you and Taehyung, though you do not know, happens to notice how often you and the red headed actor keep sneaking glimpses at each other. This day confirms your assumption that Jeongguk is indeed a part of this movie. You learn from the second table reading, where you get to briefly wave at Monnie when she arrives, that Jeongguk is casted as one out of the seven guys who are hopelessly in love with Monnie’s character.

At one point, Jimin happens to recognize you and sends you a wave as well. You can tell Monnie is also being observant by the way she scans the noticeably awkward way you refuse to interact with Jeongguk. Monnie is aware how close you and Jeongguk were in high school so how come neither of you are acting as if you once were friends?

“Are you okay?” Taehyung, all in his camera gear, leans in and whispers. You hum a ‘yes’ in response, but you can tell he doesn’t believe you.

The third day, you feel how tired you are from the lack of sleep due to not wanting to dream about Jeongguk while your boyfriend is sleeping right next to you, so you tossed and turned until you couldn’t take it anymore. All the stress of seeing Jeongguk is starting to take a toll and when arriving with Taehyung, at one point, you see Jeongguk standing off to the side while a few of the cast members are preparing to film a scene. You aren’t sure where Taehyung went off to, but you gaze at Jeongguk with the longing you wish would stop burdening you. You also wish you could tell Jeongguk how proud you are that he is finally choosing to follow his dreams because as you watch him observing the scene being played out, he looks so lovely that the sadness washing over you becomes intense.

Tattoos adorn his skin now which you find absolutely ravishing. The way he styles his hair is even different from how you remember, and that itching desire starts to build relentlessly. It is then that Jeongguk sees you. An overwhelming feeling that neither of you can explain becomes existent and he holds your eyes as if that’s the only constant keeping him at bay. You try to read his stare while he looks into your soul, yet your feet remain planted for the moment. There is no way that you are the only one who feels this connection. There is absolutely no way. So, why did he choose someone else all these years ago?

Something breaks the gaze because instead of putting on your best, inner actress, you flee to the nearest restroom. The nausea is intense- much more intense than you realize because you are throwing your hair back immediately in preparation for the retching. Nothing really comes up but some bile since you haven’t eaten yet, and now you are breathing steady to calm your nerves.

Sometimes an overwhelming amount of shock and anxiety can do this to you, so you aren’t surprised. You just are grateful that nobody else is occupying the restroom so that you can think. What in the bloody hell do you do? Do you approach him? Do you continue to ignore him? Do you tell Taehyung? The thoughts turn into pacing while you clench your stomach because what the hell are you supposed to do? Jeon Jeongguk is in the same vicinity as you and there is no one else you’d rather… confront for lack of a better term. But is it worth confronting him for all the pain he caused you what feels at this point like a lifetime ago?

Will he even remember? Will he understand why you blocked him from your life? He will just have to because he chose somebody else over you. Whereas you spent majority of your life putting him first. Is this why you feel betrayed deep down? You know ultimately you should have put yourself first which is what you learned before turning twenty-two and prior to meeting your boyfriend. Otherwise, Jeongguk was all that mattered to you.

And he still fucking does.

Gritting your teeth, you rummage through your purse for a small bottle of mouth wash that you keep for emergencies and swish it around your teeth and tongue. You rid of the foul taste and rinse with some water before taking a few deep breaths. You can do this, y/n. Just fake a smile and act as if you are going to be in this movie yourself.

Placing your hand on the bathroom door, you shove it slowly as if you are hiding from someone. Which technically you are but you get the picture. You investigate the hallways that echo a small number of footsteps, so you, in relief, step out into the unknown thinking all is safe. Standing, you can’t remember which direction you came from, so awkwardly you just continue to… Stand there. You decide to reach into your purse for your phone to text Taehyung, but fast steps dissipate your movement.

“Follow me.” A familiar voice halts your heart. He grasps your wrist before you can scream, but it’s not a firm grip, it’s a gentle hold and you jolt your stare to see a hazy view of red hair who leads you into a storage room set off to the side. You should stop him. You should shout. You should fight to call Taehyung. But you don’t. And repentantly- you don’t want to.

Jeongguk kicks the door closed behind him until your back shoves against a wall. Red strands hover over his determined eyes as he breathes heavy, now holding both of your wrists that he pins to the wall. You can’t even respond because your words die in your throat. This is the hottest fucking thing you have encountered, and you will keep that with you till the grave.

There are no words shared, just ajar mouths of panting, but he is so close that you feel his breath brushing your chin. Your body is begging for more of his touch at this point, but you do not move a muscle. It is then that you remember that you are supposed to be mad at him. Yet simultaneously you want to kiss him so bad. He can’t know this though. You have a boyfriend. You must think about Taehyung.

“Let go of me.” You say through gritted teeth even though it destroys your heart piece by piece to even say it. Jeongguk hesitates, but calmly releases his fingers that curled around your wrists and steps back carefully. Your heart is betraying you because you would do anything just to make love with him right here and now, but it isn’t the right thing to do especially with how he broke your heart. And, for the sake of Taehyung’ heart.

Jeongguk turns just to rake thin hands through his hair before he runs a palm along his face. “I don’t know what came over me.”

You do. Because you feel the powerful truth resonating in this very room. You’re hurting over him and he is hurting over you. Neither of you truly know the reasons why.

What is mind blowing to you is how seven years flies by and it is like he was never a stranger. The emotions you’ve suppressed are waiting to burst at the seams as if they would even when he was still in your life. You do not know how this is possible. You know it’s crazy. You know nothing right now makes any sense and you want to scream at the top of your lungs. And, you know even if you were to have gone back to Taehyung, Jeongguk would have done exactly what he is doing now and that is confronting the reality that you both are here. In a place far away from your hometown, you both by some twisted form of fate end up in the same place at the same time. Of course, you are pondering the odds of this, of course you fucking are. All you know is you can’t let Jeongguk hurt you again. Plus, now you have Taehyung.

“I have to go.” You finally say in the deafening silence prompting Jeongguk to turn swiftly to face you where his widened eyes hold the same desperation that you feel. Yet, he is so beautiful. Fuck. Even to this day. He is exactly how you remember but grown out of the boyish charm from high school and into a man. Your heart is pounding through your temples while you take in his features. He’s just so beautiful.

“Please…” He murmurs, stepping forward as if being even closer to you can make all of this add up. “Before you go, just tell me why.”

His statement catches you off guard. Why? What does he mean why? He can see the disbelief written all over your expression which causes him to question inwardly. How does he have the nerve to question your reasons for cutting him off? He knows good and damn well why. He has to.

You feel unsteady briefly, but you are thankful to hear your phone buzzing within your purse which you figure must be Taehyung. Jeongguk understandably gives up accepting that you must have moved on just as you assumed he has.

Reaching for the doorknob with horribly shaky fingers, you pause for a moment collecting enough strength to end this strange yet alluring moment on good terms. “I’m proud of you.” You whisper, Jeongguk’s gaze burning innocently at the back of your head while his heart feels as though it is going to explode watching you leave. “You followed your dreams. There was never a reason for you to be ashamed… Goodbye.”

And with that, you exit the storage room, returning Taehyung’s call to ask him if he can take you to the hotel while you muster with all your strength not to erupt in a pool of endless tears.

A towel is wrapped around Taehyung’s waist as he ruffles his dampened hair. He has talked endlessly about his day (as he should) and the excitement he holds for the upcoming film. You, hair wrapped in a towel, rub on a face mask to cleanse your skin as you wearily stare at your reflection in the mirror. You try so hard to listen to every word your boyfriend says, but you can’t shake any thought of Jeon Jeongguk from your mind.

Vivid flashes of the way Jeongguk pinned you to that wall stirs an unwanted wave of desire through your frame and a reoccurring pain that seems to never find closure. If only he slid his teeth along your bottom lip while slipping his hands into your pants while you whimper his name… If only the emotions from the years of longing for his return continued in breathless kisses and gasping in response to the way his lips would trail your neck… Maybe you could ignore the myriad of questions that have plagued you profusely for all these damned years of wishing, and pleading, and fighting to understand why you can’t just let. Him. Go. It’s like, in a way, a spell has been cast on you whether it’s Jeongguk himself or something that is preventing, almost trying to keep the two of you from being together in the end. But, why?

Maybe the truth is right in front of you. Maybe you don’t want to let Jeongguk go.

Maybe you really just can’t.

Taehyung eventually moves to wrap his strong arms around you from behind while he places feather-like kisses along your neck. “So, I hope you’re enjoying your time here.”

“I am.” You reply softly. His fingers then slide gently into your sweatpants where he finds your clit, rubbing nice and slow while he continues to place tepid kisses. You wish you were becoming aroused, but you can hardly concentrate on the way his lips press to your skin and his fingers slipping into you pumping gently while you squeeze your eyes shut. There are no goosebumps, no moaning, no excitement- just pure sadness.

Because you know deep down what the truth is, but you do not want to admit it. You know what’s missing in the relationship. Taehyung is not Jeongguk and he never will be. It’s the saddest simplicity of an answer. He is not Jeon Jeongguk.

“Hey…” Taehyung’s voice is soft, cautiously releasing his fingers from inside you, he then spins you around. Despite, the face mask covering your cheeks and forehead, Taehyung looks at you lovingly while he reads your eyes. “What’s wrong?”

Hesitant, you reply anyway. “Nothing.”

Taehyung flashes a pointed look because he does not believe you whatsoever. “Are you jet lagged still? …Did I do something?”

“No! …No, I’m sorry. I promise I’m not trying to be gloomy. You haven’t done anything wrong.”

“Are you sure? Because you have seemed off since you’ve been here. Is it because you haven’t gotten to see Monnie much?”

“I mean yes, I do wish I could see her more, but we have plenty of time. Work allowed me a week off, so I’m not too worried about that.”

“Then what is it?”

Guilt pools in your eyes as you visibly see his concern, but what are you supposed to tell him? Okay, maybe the question doesn’t involve what, but how? “I… don’t know.”

You let him kiss you then even though the cream of the face mask gets all over his skin, too but it somehow makes you giggle. You wish you knew how to tell him, but it is way too soon. What happened earlier with Jeongguk was probably going to be a onetime thing. You keep replaying the whole scene with Jeongguk wishing there could have been a different outcome, but you can’t change the past. And you don’t want to hurt Taehyung who has been nothing but good to you.

Once you finish freshening up, you try having sex with Taehyung to rid of the pain inside your chest, but the remorse is so smothering you hardly can enjoy it. It’s not his fault at all so you give it what you got. Except this time, when you close your eyes, all you can see is Jeongguk’s face and it takes everything in you not to burst into tears.

It's not until the day before your flight that you finally meet with Monnie. Her management rented out a space in one of the fanciest restaurants to ensure privacy from the spotlight so the pair of you could catch up. She embraced you tightly while the scent of peonies greeted your nose. It’s amazing how much the two of you had to catch up on and the endless conversation is exactly what you needed. Sometimes a friendly face helps lighten the load for a little while.

As a surprise, you facetimed LenLen so Monnie could say hello which erupts into bouts of happy squeals from LenLen. Being with Monnie made you forget how famous she actually is, and you are so thankful that she always maintained her humility amongst the fame.

Neither of you mention Jimin or Jeongguk even though you wonder if the question crossed her mind at any point. You also wonder if she kept contact with Jeongguk or if Jimin did since all four of you happened to be in the same place in a different location way far away from the high school all of you attended together. It’s surreal, but maybe not bringing the subject up was a good thing.

Anxiously, you stop by Taehyung’s work to bring him lunch and to go over the time your flight departs tomorrow. Taehyung, who proclaims he has a surprise for you, says he ordered a limousine to pick you up for your ride to the airport. Speechless, you have never ridden in a limo before, and you cannot believe how thoughtful Taehyung has been all week which fuels the devastation when you notice Jeongguk standing adjacent from you. He’s gripping another coffee cup while he speaks with one of the producers.

Did he just hear every word you said? Did he hear that you are leaving to go back home tomorrow?

“I already told Stan where to pick you up.” Taehyung attempts to say but he notices your obvious distraction which has pretty much lasted the entire week you have been here.

“Wh-who? Whose Stan?”

“I just told you, silly, the limo… driver.” Taehyung follows your wavering gaze to see the dark haired actor glimpsing at you for the hundredth time. Is this why you have been acting so strange? Do you know this guy? Taehyung starts to question if you really were with Monnie when you said you were. Or the other times before when you claimed you needed a breather.

An uneasy feeling starts to bud in Taehyung’s chest. “Um…” He leans forward to get close to your ear. “Can we talk?” Taehyung lowkey has noticed the tension ever since the first day he brought you here whenever that actor was around, but thought he was going crazy. Taehyung is typically not the jealous type, but something seems off. Everywhere you were, it seemed this actor followed.

Disrupting your entrancement, you swallow the lump in your throat as your heartbeat spikes. Taehyung just walks swiftly around a corner and unbeknownst to you, Jeongguk has excused himself from the producer to hide away enough to make sure you’re okay. He feels awful to intrude, but he can’t help the strong emotions building within his heart and the indisputable closure he wishes you would give him. Because he never was able to get over you either.

Taehyung is restless as he tries to gather whatever words he can. “Look, if I sound crazy, I don’t care. Something isn’t right. And if I had to guess, it has to do with that actor you keep looking at. So, what is it? Do you know him?”

Your hands glue to your hips while you uneasily try to keep yourself standing from the uncomfortable blow to the chest. Shit. You want to scream. Taehyung caught you and now you don’t even know where to start. “I’m sorry.” You whisper which you are surprised sounds audible, but that’s all you can muster.

“Okay, so something did happen then?”

“No! Taehyung… No, it’s not what you think.” You try to breathe but feel like you can’t from how much your chest tightens.

“Okay well what am I supposed to think? Were you really with Monnie earlier?”

“Yes! Of course, I was!”

“So why are you so distant? If I did something wrong, then I need to know so I can fix it. I also can’t read your mind. Communication is what I need here, y/n.”

“I know this, Tae… I-”

“Okay, then explain. I’m doing all I can to prove to you that I love you. I just need some kind of answer. I’m starting to get really worried, and you know I’m not like this.”

Tears brim because you know deep down, he has done everything for you. You are in the wrong for this and you know it. You do love Taehyung. You really do, but the love for him will never be as strong as the love you had for Jeongguk. The love you know you will always have for Jeongguk. The silence hurts. The emptiness and sorrow you feel for Taehyung… Hurts so deeply.

“Tae…” The tears stream to drip from your cheeks. “I want you to know that I do love you and I am forever grateful for all that you have done for me… I just, um…” You press your lips together to prevent your chin from quivering. You can’t even look your boyfriend in the eyes. You don’t even know how to answer him. How can you? If you were to tell him everything from the beginning to now, not only would it crush him, but would he truly understand where you are coming from?

“You’re not going to tell me are you.” It’s not a question. He says it sternly.

“I… I can’t.” You stifle a sob. “Tae, I’m so sorry. I just can’t right now.”

Angrily, and rightfully so, he glowers at you while his jaw clenches because after a year together, he does not understand how fast everything can change in the span of a week. And after a year, how can you not trust to tell him what is going on? He deserves to know, and you wish you could find the will to just tell him the whole story without holding back.

He is rigidly holding back tears because he is just as hurt, but he can’t bear the thought of you stepping out on him which is what he is starting to believe. Is he wrong to think that? He knows anger causes irrational thinking but right now, he wants space to clear his head. Even if it means being away from you.

“The hotel is yours tonight.”

“Tae-” You rush to step forward, but he holds a palm up to pause everything.

“The hotel is yours tonight. Stan will pick you up for your flight tomorrow… We’re done.” He shoves past you as you spin in panic to watch him leave, but you do not chase him. This is not how you wanted it to go. Not on bad terms, but you feel so devastated yet so relieved that Taehyung made this decision, yet you feel so helpless simultaneously.

The tears continue as you scramble to order someone to pick you up and if you regret one thing, it’s not telling Taehyung about your first love the first day you met him like you should have.

The guilt is eating you alive.

Your eyes are dry and puffy from the crying the night before, so to force some way to lift your spirits, you put on a faint amount of makeup and throw on a floral summer dress. What better way to cope with the heart ache by pretending there is no heart ache? You suck at that. It’s visible all over your frame that is weak and exhausted; your mind has done nothing but run vigorously on high speed since landing a week ago and you are not sure how you are functioning properly.

Once you have everything packed and prepared, you triple check the hotel room to ensure you haven’t left anything. The room felt desolate last night without Taehyung being beside you, but in a way, you appreciated being alone. Maybe it’s for the best that you never try to love anybody else because as long as Jung Jeongguk exists in your heart, there is no such thing as anybody else. How can someone have your heart this long and they were never really yours?

Rolling your suitcase behind you, the walk to the outside is brighter than you anticipate. The sun gleams high in the sky while people bustle from left to right to exit or enter the hotel building. It doesn’t take long for you to spot the limo slowly pulling up to the curb. An older man with gentle eyes greets you, introducing himself as Stan.

“Now I finally have a face to a name.” You smile sweetly as he takes your luggage to settle into the trunk. “Thank you.” You murmur. The moment you open the limo door, you duck to begin taking a seat, but something stops you in your tracks.

It’s the scene of glimmering shoes that tilts your head in confusion as you scan from the shoes all the way up the slim legs, to the loose-fitting shirt on a familiar frame to then locking eyes with the one person you never expected to see yet again.

“Jeongguk?” You croak with widened eyes. Did you say his name out loud? You have no idea. All you know is your heart is ear piercingly screaming and your fingertips have gone numb. His red hair is gelled back so you can easily see the enchanting curve of his jawline and the quirk of his lips smirking gently. You are in trouble. And you don’t care anymore. But your conscious tries to tell you the opposite.

“I um… Uh, I have to go-” You panic preparing to back away.

“Absolutely not.” Jeongguk grasps to pull you in, reaching around you to slam the limo door closed once your body plops onto the seat. When Stan hears the signal, he starts to drive away from the curb and your mind is dizzy with anxiety.

“Jeongguk.” You try to say sternly, but his name comes out in a whimper. You are trying with all your strength not to pass out.

“Y/N.” He speaks. His eyebrow cocking. You have remained leaned forward from how he pulled you in and his face is so close, you are doing everything you can to keep your heat from clenching simultaneously with the reaction of your body wanting to tremble.

“What the hell are you doing!? How the hell did you even know I would be here!?”

He shrugs. “A friend.”

“What friend-”

“Monnie. She’s known Stan for a while. So has Jin.”

“Well, Stan is about to be fired!” You try emphasizing the word loudly to kid with Stan even though you are lowkey dead serious. You should be grieving Taehyung, not letting the desire to tangle with Jeongguk be floating subconsciously in the back of a damn limousine. “If Taehyung finds out that you jacked the limo driver, he’ll be pissed. So, again, what the hell are you doing!?”

“I’ll answer your question once you answer mine.”

“Jeongguk, I’m not playing fucking games with you-”

“Neither am I.”

Eyeing him in exasperation, you shake your head to hopefully rid of the evident confusion. “You know what- we can’t do this. We can’t be alone.”

“And why not?”

“Because-” Because you just went through a breakup, damnit! Not that you are aware that he knows. But you are trying so hard not to cave into the longing to be with Jeongguk the way his eyes intensely look into yours.

After all this time, holding it in all these long, long years:

you explode.

“Because you are just so fucking ruthless, you know that!? I have had you in my fucking head since I was a child and there is no escape from you! No escape! Do you know how much it killed me to see you leave seven years ago? Do you know how fucking insane seeing you again is all these stupid ass years later? I have been losing my shit nonstop and for what!? Because you just think it’s so damn cute to occupy every fucking brain cell I have and tear me to shreds! Like, do you even fucking know the hell I’ve been through!? Seeing you with-”

Jeongguk kisses you suddenly stopping your words. This kiss is so desperate and rough yet, it’s so much softer than you would think since you were losing your absolute shit a minute ago, but his lips are as warm as you remember, and your body loosens as his hands cup your cheeks. Gasping into his kiss, the world spins so magically that you forget that you are heading to catch a flight home. You don’t want to stop. The way his mouth moves so good with yours. How are you going to pull away?

So, you don’t.

His fingertips slip to the back of your neck to deepen the kiss while the love you buried revives into the atmosphere.

Because you are so in love with him, and you never once stopped.

Jeongguk’s other hand pats along the door refusing to break the kiss and your ears catch the sound of the partition lifting to separate the pair of you from the driver. Something about that whole gesture sends a gush from your heat, wetting your thong that you inwardly hope Jeongguk will see. It’s like you are in a dream. If ‘high school you’ knew that seven years from then that you would be making out with Jeon Jeongguk in a limousine, you would have never believed it. Instead of bottling everything up anymore, you are just going to let go. In this moment, you are with the one person you have always wanted: Jeon Jeongguk. So why fucking fight it? You are done fighting it.

You have made up your mind. You want to give him your all and you want to give it now. Conversation can be saved for later.

“Guk,” you gasp between his kisses. “Please… whatever you do. Don’t… Stop.”

It doesn’t take much until his hands move to grip your waist, positioning you in a straddle. Immediately, moaning loudly against his lips that have eagerly grown hungrier as you cling to him desperately. Humming into his kiss, the relief flooding your limbs eases the tension you have fought this entire week, and your hands slide to grasp the gelled strands of his hair in deprivation. His tongue dances with yours while he fumbles with where to place his hands next.

You moan when you feel his erection beneath your heat though clothes remain on; with the dress, you're wearing, the fabric is spread enough, you're able to feel the material of his slacks along your inner thighs. You unintentionally grind your hips, him doing the same, lips nearly bruised from sultry kisses he refuses to stop.

His palm slaps your ass to then squeezing so hard, you nearly melt into his frame, your teeth sliding along his bottom lip before sneaking the tip of your tongue along it to then snatching his lips once more.

Your fingers trace his jawline, a part of him that nearly makes you faint. Breaking the kiss, his breathing is heavy while your lips linger to trail his jaw, lightly sucking with each contact until you reach his ear. A soft laugh resonates into his eardrum, him groaning with immense desire in response. You can't help yourself especially with the fire dribbling from your heat. Your inner kinks start to arise.

"I don't know if you've ever been given a blowjob in a limo baby, but I’m not going to let you forget it.” You say it so erotically, Jeongguk is losing his mind. You're wild when it comes to sex, yet you’ve only ever had one sexual partner. With the way Jeongguk’s hazy, brown eyes watch your every move, you don't mind giving him the ride of his life. You are going to show him exactly what he has missed.

Squeezing his shoulders once, you move backward off his lap carefully despite the moving vehicle. You kneel on the floor, your antsy fingers unbuckle his belt, the jingle of the metal sending jolts of excitement throughout his limbs. The anticipation is nearly smothering, especially when you unbutton his pants to show his underwear, spreading the fabric to free his erection. The sight causes you to bite your lower lip instinctively.

"Oh baby." You nearly drool. His hands curl around your wrists before you lean in to cover his area with your mouth encasing every bit of his girth. He leans back in immense pleasure while you perform a long, intense suck before dipping your head up and down seductively. Hearing him moan fuels you to continue. Running your tongue over his tip, you let the taste of his precum lead you to yearn for more, pleasuring him so much he could release right then and there. You unlatch your wrist from one of his tightening hands, bringing it to his scrotum that is peeking through the opening of his underwear, massaging softly whilst sucking, his feet pressing harder at the floorboard from the paradise he's been wanting with you and only you.

When you see how much of an effect it has on Jeongguk, you continue your bliss, sucking and sucking until his hands grasp the sides of your ribcage causing you to gasp in surprise. Without a second to blink, your back is crashed against the seat cushion with Jeongguk hovering above you, strands of his hair glistening over his eyes, his chest heaving as his hands rest on either side of you. Your eyes are wide from the sudden action, but when he lowers to place his lips near your ear, a tingling sensation waves across your figure.

"I don't know if you've ever been fucked in a limo.” He growls. “But I'm gonna make sure you, my dear, will never forget it."

Oh. Fuck. His fingertips feel for your underwear that he slides down to your ankles. He doesn’t even take a second to admire what type of underwear it is before he comes back to kiss you.

You are so aroused that your vaginal walls are sopping wet before Jeongguk slams his erection into you. He drums so hard that you can't help the screams of pleasure that are gratefully unheard from the vibration of the speakers reverberating within the small space. This is when you realize music must have started playing to drown out the sounds Stan most likely does not want to hear.

Your hands clasp roughly to Jeongguk’s sides which regains your focus. He pounds so rhythmically with the bass of whatever song is playing, your g-spot is being stroked with each thrust. The growing climax sends your eyes rolling back. Jeongguk slows for a moment though and aligns his body with yours still keeping himself inside you. You watch him while your chest heaves.

He lifts a finger to trace along your cheek until he caresses your bottom lip with his thumb. You are uncertain why he has stopped, but you are thankful neither of you have cummed too soon because you are not ready for this to end. Even though it has to… Oh, shut the fuck up brain.

“You’re not going to the airport today.” His eyes shift from a lust to a softness that reminds you of when he first became your friend. You want to sit up in surprise, but you don’t because you like Jeongguk’s body being on top of you and his erection keeping its rightful place inside you.

“What do you mean? I’m supposed to leave today.”

“I… Have made other arrangements.”

“Did you cancel the flight!? How!?”

“Well, no… But I can reimburse you for the inconvenience of missing your flight.”

“Are you…” In honesty, you are not upset at all. Your heart is flying so high with relief, you could cry. A smirk graces your tingling lips. “Are you kidnapping me, Jeon Jeongguk?”

“Only if you let me,” he winks, pressing a slow kiss to your bruised lips. “Otherwise, the airport I will take you but only if you say so.”

“What about my job? I have to go back at some point.”

Sadness etches in the corner of his eyes while he exhales slowly. “How about we worry about that tomorrow? … I don’t want to lose you. Not again.”

You don’t either.

Your hand reaches to tangle in his hair while you pull him to kiss you. He starts thrusting again, but this time nice and slow while your tongue swirls with his. The two of you are so lost in intimacy that neither of you notices the pause of the limo and the dimming of the music. It's Jeongguk who jolts away immediately, stuffing his being back into his pants, scrabbling to buckle his belt before it dawns on you that the limo is no longer moving. Swiftly, you fix your dress, running your hands through your hair in panic, also hoping your makeup isn't smeared all over.

Your throbbing heat is relentless, and you squeeze your thighs to try and relieve some of the sensitivity, but it's no use. Once Stan opens the door, you and Jeongguk smile at him trying to hide the fact the two of you were literally having intercourse directly behind his back.

Stan squints his eyes in suspicion when he notices how embarrassed the two of you chuckle when leaving the limo, but he brushes it off, him tipping his hat for a farewell. You grasp Jeongguk’s hand while your other hand clings to your luggage. You do not know where you are, but you are assuming it’s where Jeongguk lives.

“My roomates are still shooting scenes for the movie we’re in, so we have this whole place to ourselves for the time being.” Jeongguk beams. Your feet move faster than they ever have as he follows suit to the front door. He chuckles at how cute your eagerness is because he is just as giddy, too. Being with you just comes so naturally even after all this time. The moment you reach the door, you spin around, dragging his mouth to yours.

Your back hits against the front door nearly bringing you to your knees while he follows your lead. You throw your arms around his neck as his hands press into your waist; the two of you rebuild the itching desire that had been interrupted. The pure addiction of Jeongguk’s lips on yours is everything you could have dreamed of, so you hate that you have to break the kiss just for him to unlock the door. Snatching his hand once more, you kick off your heels, him slipping out of his shoes while your luggage tips over somewhere near the door.

You follow him up the stairs until both of you are safe in his bedroom. He locks the door behind him once he turns on the lights, and that's when he tackles you lovingly once again, kissing your mouth roughly. Your hands pull off his shirt and in return, he unzips the back of your dress.

When your lacy undergarments taunt his enlarging eyes, you step away from your dress, giving him a seductive smile. Now he notices your thong. Sliding your fingers slowly to your entrance, you coat your digits with the wetness he's caused you, stepping forward to carefully smear it on his lips. His eyes close while his staggered breaths relish in your scent, urging to taste you, he clamps his warm mouth around your fingers, his teeth grazing your skin while he sucks.

"I want you, Jeongguk." You whisper. "I want you to never stop wanting me."

That's all it takes before he squats to wrap his arms underneath your ass, lifting you effortlessly in the air prompting a fit of giggles. He sprints to his bed and crashes you onto it. Once the bounce of your bodies settles, his hands desperately tear your thong from your frame as well as your lace bra, his mouth leaving tenderly placed kisses along your ribcage before your trembling hands move to rid of his pants. Unbuckling his belt, Jeongguk helps you free himself from his pants and underwear- every article of clothing between the both of you finally plopped on the ground.

Unexpectantly, he rolls you above him, pressing your bare chest against him, his teeth nipping your ear lobe before his breath haunts your ear in the sexiest, deep voice you've ever heard. "If I'm going to taste you properly, I want it all over my face."

Oh. Shit.

Jeongguk clings onto your hips once you get into position. You move with him until your folds are above his starving mouth. Now with his heated palms smoothed along your ass, you lower yourself just enough until you hear the sudden sound of his lips caressing along your heat bringing a moan to escape your throat. "Ohhh, baby." You breathe. His tongue circles your heat slowly before he roughly flicks it against you, delighting in your taste while your head thrusts back in ecstasy.

You've never had sex so good- especially with the way his tongue licks so effortlessly underneath your clenching vaginal walls. Your thighs quiver from how strong your climax is building. His lips cover your clit, sucking before returning his tongue to lick rapidly among your slit.

"Ohhh, Jeongguuk." You can hardly concentrate, him continuing his mission until you slide back, forcing him to raise, his bangs now clinging to his perspired forehead. His lips part just to land to kiss your chin where the scent from your folds is fresh on his lips.

He’s starving for you, and you learn right then that he wasn’t done. His hand finds your chest where he pushes you down until your back bounces on the mattress. His fingers find your nipples first where the ticklish feel from the rising buds causes the fire below to heighten. Whimpering in response to the pleasure, his mouth latches onto your nipple while his tongue dances along it.

You beg for him as he pleasures you. The intensity of how turned on you are is so heavenly, you could do this forever. He then kisses along your body until he stops at where he originally feasted and you can see the lust in his eyes before he dives in, lapping up every bit of you while he slides gentle fingertips to then vibrate along your clit. “Oh Guk! Oh baby- ah!” You moan feeling how strong your sense pleads to orgasm while your eyes roll back in ecstasy. His tongue is relentless while he licks along your heat.

When you think he’s done, he repositions to where you are sitting on his face again while his large hands cup your ass.

"Now." He says, his lips tickling your skin when you both find yourselves hazy and twisted together. "Where were we before we were interrupted?"

"I think I remember." You whisper musingly, him rolling you to crash under him- his penis finds your entrance before you can catch a breath, and that's when he starts. Pumping into your walls that are warm and drenched, your screams of delight ring throughout his room, letting Jeongguk enthrall every single one of your senses until your legs nearly give out. You moan his name. You moan profanities. You moan it fucking all. "Harder!" Your voice breaks. "Harder! Oh!"

Your climax hits you suddenly and strongly prompting you to squirt slightly which turns Jeongguk on even more than he already is. Your legs jolt beneath him while he spills inside you. You’re still screaming in pleasure from the high when he falls next to you, him leaking down your mid-thighs while you squeeze them for friction. Both of you hyperventilating, the sensitivity still presents between your legs while you two try to recover.

"Holy shit." You breathe. "Where the hell have you been again? Holy fuck."

A deep chuckle sounds from Jeongguk’s pearly smile, his eyes gleaming from the happiness he feels with you finally by his side. When his long fingers intertwine with yours, you furrow your eyebrows, shifting to rest on your side so that way you can see all of him easier.

Preparing to speak, his free hand reaches to tuck a strand of your fallen hair behind your ear rendering you speechless. Though you've kept your feelings private for so long, he's always made your heart palpitate; but, with everything that has happened, where do either of you start?

You lean your cheek into his palm where he rests it, him moving to sit up just enough to brush his lips to yours before pressing kisses on every inch of your face, his sudden passion surprising you, especially when he turns you to lay you back down just so he can lounge in your beauty from above.

“I like you naked.” He teases causing you to playfully scoff when you shove him. His chuckling smile kisses your smile while you enjoy the feel of his warm skin and the high of his presence. “I’ve missed you…” He whispers when the moment becomes serious which hitches your breathing.

Missing Jeongguk is an understatement. You’ve wished to see him again but never thought it would actually happen. You know you shouldn’t ask this, but it has tormented you since he left that you can’t help it. Hearing those words from him should have made your heart swell, but then the picture that changed everything years ago seems to be in the forefront of your mind now. “Then… why did you choose her?”

Jeongguk’s eyebrows scrunch as his lips pucker. The confusion is so apparent that you start to feel the budding sense of humiliation. He met a girl at Konkuk, right? The picture showed it all… Right?

“I mean I dated here and there later on in college, but I had to get over losing you.”

You shift to sit up as Jeongguk’s body rolls off you. What does he mean?

“But you wouldn’t have lost me if you hadn’t chosen to be with her. I mean, c’mon, Guk you hardly talked to me once you left. I spent countless nights wondering what I had done wrong! I knew you’d be busy, but I never thought, nor did I want to believe it’s because you found someone else.”

He tries so hard to understand what you are talking about as he reads your panicked gaze. But… you blocked him? Why would you block him unless you moved on too? He is uncertain of the girl you are talking about, but he listens as best as he can while he racks his brain of what happened seven years ago.

“Y/N…” He says calmly. “Can you please tell me what you are talking about?”

“You know exactly what I’m talking about, Guk! The picture! You had your arm wrapped around another girl! What else was I supposed to think? Do you know how destroyed I was?”

Jeongguk flits his sight to the comforter while the pair of you start to distance from your sweaty frames. The smell of sex is starting to fade, and you bundle the comforter over your chest while Jeongguk’s lower-half slips under the covers. When realization enlarges his eyes, his heart drops to his stomach. Now, he knows what you’re talking about.

“Wait… Yoongi’s girlfriend?”

“Yoongi? I thought-”

Jeongguk’s eyes search yours as if he is trying to get you to telepathically see his memories. “Me and Jin were at the hospital for a few days because Yoongi was in the hospital from- from the accident.” He wets his lips. “Sun Hee was just a friend of mine, and she was stressed from it all, so I was just trying to be there for her. We weren’t dating! I’m pretty sure we’re even related somehow.”

“Wait- wait a minute, what?” The heat hovering over your chest is intensely overwhelming when you realize the huge mistake you have made. “You mean-?”

“When I came home, I tried to get a hold of you so I could tell you everything, but I was blocked! Even years later, I tried checking social media every now and then so I could find you again, but it was like you disappeared!” Jeongguk is pouring his heart out to you meanwhile tears of utter humiliation form and begin to drip in so much regret, you can’t believe the fog in your head is allowing you to compute his every word. “Why didn’t you talk to me first? Why didn’t you let me know you were hurt?” Jeongguk’s voice is pained as he continues. “I could have explained everything! I even showed up at your place a few months after, but you weren’t home.” He doesn’t mention your dad since none of this involves either of your parents especially when he sees your reaction.

“You… came back?”

“Of course, I did! I was in love with you, y/n! I even planned to tell you about Konkuk’s mix up! They sent you the wrong letter. You were accepted. I had it all ready and planned out to surprise you! There was never anybody else, it was always you!”

The world stops. Everything just stops. The words you have longed and hoped and wished and prayed have just been said to you by Jeon Jeongguk. The man you have loved to no end. You can’t move. You don’t budge. This embarrassment is so deep and severe, you just want to run.

That’s why Jeongguk asked you why.

“Y/N? Y/N?” Jeongguk reaches to hold you.

“I was accepted into Konkuk? You- you got it fixed for me? You-”

Your head is spinning, nothing makes sense anymore. All this time, you were robbed of being with Jeongguk because of you. Not him, not fate, not destiny, not your parents, not the girl, not Konkuk University:

you.

Dropping the covers, you race to gather your things. You don’t even know if your flight has left yet. You don’t even know the time, but you must go home before you ruin everything again.

“Y/N? Please. Please hold on-”

You blur out his voice while you fumble to grab your things. Jeongguk tries to stop you, his eyes pleading- begging. You don’t know how you remembered Stan’s phone number that Taehyung happened to text you after the argument, but you manage to shoot Stan a text despite the chaos. All you hope is he is right down the road.

Somehow you find a way down the stairs while tears pour non-stop. How will you ever forgive yourself for the mess you made? Grabbing your suitcase, you struggle to put on your shoes while Jeongguk tries to slip on his. When Stan arrives, you jump into the backseat where you and the man of your dreams made love paining you as you sob. He’s frantically begging you not to leave but you can’t bring yourself to now that you finally know the truth. You don’t even give Stan time to help you. Rather, you fling your suitcase into the back seat and slam the door before Jeongguk reaches you.

“Y/N! Please don’t go! Please! We can figure this out!”

It’s all crashing down so hard as you hear Jeongguk’s voice. You beg Stan to hurry, and as the limo turns to head to the airport, you see the man you love more than anything falling to his knees in mirroring agony.

{24}

It’s him.

It has always been him.

Your hands grip the steering wheel until your knuckles are white as your eyes stay focused on the road ahead. You barely made your flight that day, and with hushed tears, the whole flight was nothing but heavy misery.

When you made it home, you were too tired to pack anything, so you stayed bundled in you and Taehyung’s bed with no will to want to do anything other than cry. It took another week for Taehyung to return home and that’s when he convinced you to give the relationship another try. You thought staying was what you deserved because after what you did to Jeongguk, you don’t deserve him anymore. And you still loved Taehyung even if it wasn’t completely to the fullest as it should have been.

It was when the movie Jeongguk and his friends were in blew up all around the world that you started seeing his face everywhere. Every picture, every magazine, every interview on television. Taehyung, naturally, questioned about everything that happened between you and ‘that actor’ as he refers to Jeongguk, so you summarized as vaguely as you could which still wasn’t enough for Taehyung. Of course, you suppress the guilt as much as you can since that is all you have seemed to feel anymore.

“There is someone from my past that means the absolute world to me and always will.” Jeongguk’s words from the interview that prompted Taehyung to leave echoes silently in the car. “This person encouraged me and believed in me even when I didn’t know it. They said to not be afraid anymore. So, I took that advice and I’m thankful I did. Now, I’ve gained brotherhood and my dreams have come true.” The remote almost slipped from your hand while you stared in shock. You knew Taehyung needed to know the truth because Jeongguk was your truth.

The fight and the breakup are still fresh, but now that it’s dark, you wipe your fingers along your face to rid of the new tears.

Jeongguk is known by the whole world now. Globally. He really did accomplish the dreams that you knew he could and would reach. He is going to make history for the rest of his life, and you will cheer him on no matter what distance. No matter what time. You will always cheer him on. Because he deserves it all.

The bleachers of the soccer field. That is where you wanted to escape to.

Stepping down the metal seats, you find the infamous spot where you would secretly watch Jeongguk all those years ago as well as the times the friendship bloomed, and he would come see you every day before your dad picked you up.

You smile through the tears as you descend into the spot. The tall lights glisten with the stars as you sit back enough to feel the breeze and you can smell the mist of the humidity from the earlier evening rain. You don’t know how much time passes, nor do you care. You just want to be here where Jeongguk used to be so you can relive all the memories and create memories you wish you could have shared with him during the years you took away.

Unexpectedly, you hear the familiar pounce of footsteps making their way down the bleachers perking your ear drums to tune into the sound. You are not sure who it could be at this time of night, and you also aren’t sure if you should be afraid. You stiffen immediately once the steps stop. Silence.

“…Y/N?”

Standing in response ever so excruciatingly slow. You cannot believe the voice you are hearing. No way.

His voice is soft as flower petals when he says your name, and the tears brim as you turn to face him with unshed happiness blossoming along your heart because Jeon Jeongguk in the flesh is standing there with hope mingled with stunned nervousness evident in his expression. “I didn’t know you’d be here.”

Swiping a tear, you hardly can believe it yourself, but now you understand why you felt the urge to come here. It’s because you were meant to because the stars were aligning for him to be here too. Where it all started. “I didn’t know you’d be here either.”

“I come here when I-”

“Need an escape.”

“And, to think about you.”

Your chin quivers as you keep his eyes connected with yours. It’s been a year since you have seen him, yet it still seems so fresh as if it all happened just yesterday. “I’m so sorry.” You whisper, trying to stifle a sob. “It was all my fault that we missed out on so many years we could have been together. It’s honestly even been years since I have been here. But something… something fueled me to come here, and here I am.”

“Well…” Jeongguk clears his throat while he slips his cold fingers into his pockets. “I have a new rule for you.”

Looking at him, you wait for his response while you wipe at another tear that escapes.

“Please don’t say you’re sorry anymore. You have nothing to be sorry about.”

“But I do.” You sniff to clear your airways. “I should have spoken to you the second I saw that damned picture, but I… I was so hurt and panicked that I let my selfishness take over when you needed me the most…

If I would have just waited for your call. Things would have been different. I should have asked about your friend, too. He was hurt and even though, I didn’t know him personally, I should have asked about him. Asked about you and how you were doing. If Jin was okay. There- there should have been consideration, but I let me get in the way of… Me. And I’m so sorry… Even for a year ago, the humiliation devastated me that I didn’t know how to face you. I think… I think I needed time to forgive myself for taking away time I could have spent being with you.” You stare down at your hands that are quivering from the anxiety.

“We still have time.” Jeongguk murmurs. After a few seconds of silence, he speaks. “Now, come here.”

Flitting your gaze in surprise, it’s as if the tradition never ended, but this time, there will not be a single goodbye after this embrace. Immediately, you sprint to crash into his arms, bundling into his frame while the sobs are relentless. “It’s you, Guk. It’s always been you. I’m so proud of you and all you have accomplished. I will never stop cheering you on or supporting you. You are everything to me.” He squeezes you so tight and fights to prevent his own tears from spilling onto your hair that tucks beneath his chin. He isn’t going to let you go. He holds you while you let it all out, crying all the guilt and the regret into his clothes while he comforts you the way he always will.

Into the evening, the pair of you find yourselves sitting on the bleachers staring at the stars where fingers are interlaced. This time you found the courage to grab his hand, sitting so close that shoulders are touching while the moon glistens above. Early memories begin to bud.

“Remember in elementary school when you took the blame for me smacking Kevin?”

A sly smile fills Jeongguk’s face. “Do I! That was the best day of my life!”

You look at him incredulously. “You went to the principal’s office!”

“I know, but you smacked Kevin before I could, so I wanted to take some credit.”

“Oh God, then why were you his friend later on?”

Jeongguk’s lips press in a firm line. “He didn’t have the best life growing up… Found him in tears one day so I gave him a chance. Then we lost touch.” He shrugs.

“Well, I hope he’s okay.”

“Me too.”

Silence lingers for a moment before you continue, “I guess my point of bringing up that whole situation is because that was the day, I started having feelings for you.” The serenity that collects in his gaze while he locks eyes with you breathes life into your heart just as strongly as his presence has the entirety of the night. “I don’t want to lose you anymore, Guk.” You whisper. “I’m done losing you.”

Jeongguk’s eyes reflect serene emotion and after a few minutes of him moving forward to press a slow, sweet kiss to your forehead, you then notice his free hand moves to retrieve a square box from his jacket pocket. Pulling away slightly, you stare at the box then to Jeongguk, then the box and then back to Jeongguk. Speechless.

“I bring this with me every single time I visit here, but I didn’t realize the exact moment I needed would present itself.” He shifts to face you more while you stare in stunned silence. “This is a gift I’ve been wanting to give you for years… I got it back when I started college. The second I saw it, I saved up all I could so I could surprise you.” He then hands it to you. “Open it.”

Tears are in your eyes as you bring shaky fingers to your lips. You reach for the gift and lift the lid cautiously to see the most beautiful shimmering necklace you have ever seen. The diamonds smile back at you while the symbol of a page from a script beams in the moonlight. “I know it’s not exactly how we met, but it is definitely what brought us together.”

“Jeongguk!” You cry, as he reaches for the necklace. You move slightly as he helps you put it on. You can’t take your eyes off the symbol. How did he even find something so perfect and so beautiful? “Guk, I- I love it so much! I don’t- I don’t even- I haven’t-”

His hands find your cheeks to force you to look into his eyes which ceases your panic.

“You are enough.” He means every word and you feel his heart connecting with yours beyond what you can fathom. “Also,” he smiles excitingly. “The offer still stands at Konkuk University if you still want to attend. There’s plenty slots open.”

“Oh, Guk!” You burst with elation. Immediately, he leans into you, pressing his lips to yours igniting the magic that comes alive because the pair of you have finally found each other and refuse to let it diminish. Not anymore.

“I love you.” You gasp between kisses. “I never stopped loving you.” You cling to him while he deepens the kisses, pulling you even closer.

“I love you, more...” He whispers. “And I will never stop.”

590 notes · View notes

vminity21 · 8 months

Text

Once Upon A Dream | ot7

Pairing: ot7 x reader, soulmate!au

Word Count: 26,480

Genre: fluff, smut, angst, soulmate!au, f2l!au, strangers to lovers!au, established relationship!au

Warning(s): profanity, angst, smut, unprotected sex, nipple play, oral (m + f receive), slight f!dom, breast worship, hand job, clit play, fingering, brief mention of depression, Rated: 18+

Summary: In this universe, not a single individual is aware that deep in the depths of harmonious slumber, dreams will show them a future that holds their forever. Their soulmate. There are seven different stories each embodied by different themes that all hold one thing in common: the power of true love's kiss.

Pairing: collegestudent!namjoon x adulting!reader, f2l!au (18+)

“What do you mean it costs this much?” When shock mingling with frustration forms into an exasperated sigh, your hand rakes through your hair in disbelief portraying the definition of stress in its purest authenticity. Your fingers that are curled around the auto insurance bill leave small indents behind when the dreaded piece of paper is now being placed upon the table. “Damnit,” tears flood your eyes while your palms shadow over your cheeks. You have already set money aside to save for the rent for your apartment along with your car payment as well as savings toward your electricity cost. Today, the discovery of your current expense being fifty more dollars than usual means that, yet another week goes by with surviving off the little groceries you have left stored in your pantry.

Shoving out of your jacket, the light air of spring has begun, and for once, you would like to appreciate nature without the anxious feeling of life overwhelming your mind. Eyes scanning the vacancy of your apartment, loneliness returns, and the yearn to hear your mother’s voice has never felt so painful. It has only been six months since you moved hours away for a job offer that you felt would be a good opportunity to further you into the career you have sought for. But, never in your existence did you dream that living paycheck to paycheck could bring so much misery, and hardly being able to speak to your mother has been weighing heavy on your conscious, but your determination to make her proud is what matters to you the most.

The jingle of your keys resonates the living room congruent with the shift of your feet wiggling into your tennis shoes. If there is anywhere you want to be right now, it’s not in this apartment, not near the opened envelopes of woe, not near your bedroom that reminds you of your exhaustion, and not near the refrigerator that is empty of any content that can fill your tummy. The drive to the local park flourishing with pinks and whites of cherry blossoms comes into view quicker than you anticipate, and with schools being in session, the area is not as crowded as it would be on the weekends. Petals float in the wind, swooping to the ground to paint the cement with color- your footsteps slow when the tunnel of tree branches exuberates perfumes of the florets to ease your tense frame.

You return to work tomorrow, but gratefully there is plenty of hours left in the day to explore, and with the solace of the atmosphere, it feels nice to escape from the turmoil of watching your paycheck disappear in order to live. A bench appears further into the path, mahogany tint with protruding sunlight breaking through the trees. Memories of what you consider your ‘past life’ churns with images of times where your grandfather shared stories of his childhood speaking lines of wisdom that encouraged you to be the person that you will and have become. He was the first soul to bring you to a park when you were younger, giving you a tour of what all there was to see- your almond eyes widened with wonder, gripping his hand while you would point out all the sights.

You miss those days more than you will profess, wishing you can relive them especially with what you have been enduring since your move. Gaze dropping to your shoes, hands in pockets- you gasp in surprise when your shoulder meets the figure of someone walking from the opposite direction,

“I’m sorry!” Panic is etched in your voice while you swiftly bow, a blush creeping to your cheeks in embarrassment when your steps quicken along the path. The tone belongs to a man who apologizes in return, yet your eyes keep their focus away from him; you’re very timid, something you’ve struggled with since the day you were born, and it’s hard enough to face your fears as it is, and uncertain on if the stranger would have been angry with you, you find it best to pretend it never happened. At least here, you feel safe alongside nature, and when the familiar sound of a rippling lake perks your auditory senses, a small tug of relief pulls at the corner of your lips, and the earlier chagrin of interrupting someone on their tread will no longer disturb your meditation.

Something seems familiar about this place. Blusterous winds streaming through strands of your hair that tickle your shoulders beneath the blinding rays of the sun where grass pokes at your legs that are exposed from the end of your dress wrinkled upon your thighs. Cumulus clouds keep their distance from the beams flickering immensely within the blanket of blue, brightening the vibrancy of yellow flowers swaying beside stems of rubicund leaflets enhancing the field in iridescent whispers of delicacy.

You have seen this all before somewhere in the slumbers of imagination where your heart aches for peace such as this. Steeps of ornate mountains encompass the field in lavender shades collecting the finishing touches of scenery your dreams desire. But, there is something different. Rather, the sense that you are alone diminishes which prompts your vision to parade the panorama of daylight until a figure enters a distance ahead of you. A pile of wispy, dark hair clears to reveal a man, eyes closed- the backs of his hands posed upon his knees leading to his fingers aimed upward mirroring the position you are in. How he seems so close when he is far away startles you even while you memorize the sight of his thick lips lying in a straight line of content.

Your head tilts in profound concentration of where you may have seen him- where you may have known him, but you come up empty, for here in this world of tranquility, you have not seen him here before. There is a strange ponder of wanting to rise to your feet, but you lean forward instead, observing the slow rise and fall of his chest where he breathes in and out deeply. He is clothed in white, darkening his already tanned skin- your stare tracing from his neck to see his face once more, and when your lids squint to study him,

He opens his eyes-

“Ma’am? Ma’am,” the echo of a calm voice breaks through enough to awaken your bleary eyes, “Ma’am, are you okay?” Drool gathered at the corner of your mouth you swipe with the hem of your sleeve; your eyes are sensitive from how bright it is outside, and it takes a moment for them to adjust once you turn your head gradually in order to remember where you are. The flowing trickles of water, the soreness of your back scratching from the log of a tree, and the soft squeeze of a large hand on your shoulder alarms you enough to realize you fell asleep while reminiscing at the lake.

You refrain from cursing under your breath when nerves shoot through your veins, gathering yourself enough to look at whoever is hovering above you. Stuttering to find words, you weakly accept the strong hand offered to you to help you up. Concern is etched in the shape of brown irises reading your stare while nostalgia fogs your brain. “Do I- do I know you?” Your voice is hardly a murmur, but he timidly steps away, the familiarity of his face bringing a quiet gasp to your parting lips.

“We, uh, we um, ran into each other earlier,”

“Oh no,” shame shudders your shoulders when you press your forehead into your palm to lightly rub your eyes, “God, I’m so sorry-”

“No, no it’s okay! Really, it’s okay. It was an accident-”

“I should have watched where I was going-”

“Well, I should have, too.”

With a creased forehead, your body is still recovering from your unexpected nap, and you’re trying to feign bravery to return your eyes to the stranger whose hair is hidden within a black beanie, yet dark tufts brush the tips of his ears. Dimples illuminate his rising cheeks from the tiny grin embellishing his expression, and dialogue disappears from your tongue at the noticing of how exquisite he is.

“Kim Namjoon,” his large hand swallows yours as it did minutes ago, but this time in a polite shake of greeting.

“I’m [Y/N],” you nod seeing his grin widen to cause a silent sweep of relief to your system.

“Wait a minute,” your eyelids enlarge from the recognition now embracing your thoughts. Flashbacks from high school smother you immediately when the images of a quiet persona who sauntered the hallways with the intelligence of an Einstein clicks on a lightbulb subconsciously. “I do know you, we-” wetting your lips, you stammer in fear of being wrong, “We went to the same grade school. You- you beat me at the math competition! Wh- what brings you to Gyeongju?”

“College,” his voice is shaky for you to jolt at the realization that you are still shaking his hand- roughly you might add, awkwardly releasing to return your limb to your side. It’s already humiliating enough to stand before him after plummeting into his side when first arriving to this destination, to then making a fool of yourself sleeping in front of him to also awaken to ruin all ounce of potential conversation you could have had. Preparing yourself for the worst, you wince, wishing you could slip under the covers of your bedroom to hide away forever. “What about you? Are you attending University here, too?”

“I- erm, about that-” There is not a way for you to explain, because there isn’t much to say other than your heart belonged to another career path. “I received a job offer here. One that I thought would provide good benefits than my original plan, but it’s not what I expected,” Namjoon’s eyebrows furrow igniting a surge in frantic slews of sentences from your mouth, “I mean, I love it. I really do, it’s- it’s what I love to do, but I guess- I want- I want more from it. But I don’t know how to- I-” Warm chuckles leave his lips that halts your rambling in a heartbeat, “I talk way too much, I’m sorry-”

“You’re not talking too much. You’re fine, I promise.” a brief spark settles a reminder of your budding attraction toward him that your chest heats with a dark hue of red; your arms slide to cross over your chest in an attempt at hugging yourself- timorously beaming up at him to search his tender gaze. “You know, if you’re up for it, there’s a restaurant not too far from here that has the best pasta I’ve ever had,” Namjoon’s fingers disappear into the pockets of his jeans- nervously rocking on his heels because after all these years he never thought he would run into anyone he once acquainted with in his younger days, but here you are, standing before him in all your glory. You were someone he admired from afar who treated him as though he was part of the team versus an outcast as others preferred him to be. But you were different. You never saw anyone as below you, and though the pair of you never blossomed into a friendship, you at least treated him with kindness despite the rumors pupils whispered in the foyers. “I already planned on going there today actually-”

“I’d love to!” Your fingertips shut your lips from the excitement you didn’t mean to interrupt him with, “I mean, I uh, I’d- I’d like that very much, thank you,”

It’s strange how the imagination of a world can seem so real, and the awareness of how close he is bringing flutters of butterflies within your stomach while your ears tune in to the scuffling sounds of your footsteps prodding along the route. No matter how hard you contemplate, whatever vision you had at the lake isn’t coming to you, but the consistent feeling that you’re experiencing brings the suspicion that whatever you dreamt is now becoming a reality.

The air is calmed in a manner that reflects a pleasant silence where your focus happens to remain on the cold mush of fibrous moss gathering between your fingers. Eyes are closed momentarily yet the hint of the sun is evident, but the source of your confusion isn’t from the odd wonder of why your hands are gripping the earth, instead, it is for the question of why your back is pressed to the ground as though you have fallen into slumber.

Blinking open to the blue of the sky, you are paused for only a mere moment to discover this time, sparse altocumulus clouds entering your vision enough to ease yourself to sit up. Freeing your digits from what you see to be a deep shade of magenta mingled with numerous hues of green festooning across the land, it is astonishing the beauty your vision is encountering prompting you to whirl your head in every direction to take in the glacier gray of the mountains you observe to be cratering a lapis glow of a lake.

The familiarity of a reminiscent involving a body of water decides to accompany your mind, but the difference between your memory of what you assume regards to reality, is that what you are gazing upon now, is nothing but magical. In wondrous awe, you find yourself standing, taking a slow bare foot forward, just to be halted when the feel of something is settled around your head. Furrowed eyebrows, you lightly tap along what feels to be numerous twigs tangled together with stems of bloomed petals. You raise your other hand to retrieve the item, glance widening at the myriad of dancing colors in the form of flowers embellishing what looks to be what one would call a crown.

Has it been there all along?

An inkling to turn around urges you to do so, lips parted in a gasp though not one sound escapes. He stands before you, the man from a preceding ponder, dressed in white, angelically beaming from head to toe, imitating the enchanting resonation of the atmosphere, causing you to long for whatever bliss he has within his touch. Did he give this to you?

Tenderly, he reaches to place his fingertips beneath the flower crown where your heart leaps at the faint brush of his skin. Lifting it ever so steadily, he returns to set the emblem where it belongs, to the empress of his heart, of his universe, completing you in all entirety. Your eyes flicker between his in suppressed doubt; is this real? You are so enveloped in the amiability of his gape, your palms extend to fold along his shoulders, leading his hand to rest at the side of your neck. He is reading your soul as much as you are trying to decipher his, but there is a connection that no other will ever be able to gain from you as much as him.

The nearness of him is what you are now in concentration of, leaning closer, waiting for what you are hoping for-

Namjoon’s long frame slides upon the plaid picnic blanket, abdomen first, while he folds his arms to where he rests his cheek, “I’m feeling the weight of that essay from last night,”

“And, you still turned it in late,” you tease, munching on a snack while he throws a playful side glance. It’s been a month since the reuniting, and the friendship has become exactly what you have been needing. Unfortunately, finances have still been a heavy burden, but at least you have found an ally in Gyeongju who is just as excited to see you as you are him.

“I mean I was pretty distracted,”

Scoffing, you smack his shoulder lightly with the back of your hand, “That video of that kitten was so cute, and you know it,”

“I never said it wasn’t cute,” the way his lips break into the widest smile, his eyes squinting in the way they do that then reveals his dimples; as much as you’d like to deny the way your heart feels a sense of longing, you mask it quite effortlessly.

“You literally giggled so much, I thought you were going to pee,” breathy laughter escapes him prompting him to bury his head into his arms, your gaze never leaving his shaking shoulders. “Well, it’s true!” Moments such as these bring a joy you are thankful exists, but little does Namjoon know, or so you assume, that once you step into your apartment to be reminded of how little you have moneywise, the depression seeps in. It is hard enough to work every day as hard as you do, just to watch your paycheck subtract away right before your eyes with each bill. It is something you haven’t necessarily opened about, because you just don’t know how. And, the last thing you need is for someone to offer help that you know they may not have.

“That’s only happened one time!” He exclaims, him shifting to lean more on his side so he can peer up at you. This area particularly is further within the park where there are not as many trees, which gives enough space to lay out a blanket and view the scenery. Sunshine brightens the atmosphere as well as warming your skin, and though you’re continuing to cackle with Namjoon, you slide until you are upon your back, using your arm to shade some of the sunlight. One perk regarding the park is it’s free, which is why you always ask to come here when hanging out, and you refuse to let Namjoon pay a dime for anything, not even a candy bar.

The nearness of his body does not heighten your senses until you turn to look at him, and that’s when you melt wishing nothing more than to kiss him. Which explains the dreams you’ve been having lately. Laughter has ceased for the time being, instead the conversation moves into a different subject, one you hoped wouldn’t happen, but considering your avoidance of going to many places, and the embarrassment of Namjoon seeing the emptiness of your kitchen one too many times, the paranoia of him catching on to why you have been slightly more stressed than usual may enter his suspicions.

“Have you been okay?” By the tone of his voice, you can tell right away he is aware of something. But, how can you tell him you are fine, when you are nowhere near one hundred percent. You definitely feel that way when with him, because he makes you forget about the reality at home, but gives you a time to escape, a time to embrace the joy he provides you every chance he gets. Should you tell him the truth? “[Y/N], I never mentioned this before just because I figured it was just coincidence, but when was the last time you’ve gotten groceries? Like, actual groceries,”

“Ramen is groceries,”

“I-” Namjoon pauses, “What I mean is, more than just ramen noodle cups and stale chips,”

“Maybe that’s how I like my chips. Corny and stale,”

“That sounds-”

“Listen,” you lift an index finger, “if vegetables and fruits would last longer than a week, I totally wouldn’t feel like I’m wasting money.”

“You know if you need anything, I’m here for you,” his words nearly bring you to tears, leading you to turn your head in the opposite direction to avoid his concerned expression. He knows you are making excuses at this point and of course, he is not entirely sure of why, but he may be able to guess correctly if he tried.

“I don’t need anything, I promise I’m fine,” your reply is soft, but loud enough for him to hear. Though you can’t see it, Namjoon’s eyebrows furrow, him picking at his fingertips while in deep concentration. He is learning that you, stubbornly, are most definitely not going to let him help in any way, but unbeknownst to you, is that he will stop at nothing to make sure you are okay no matter what.

“Look at me,” your heart skips a beat immediately when you slowly return to where he is within your glimpse, his thumb reaching to brush your bottom lip where he inches much closer than you anticipated. All you know, is that if he reads every word that your mind is screaming, your heart may burst out of your chest. Yearning for his kiss, he is close enough to where his breath sweeps your chin, “[Y/N], really, if there is anything at all that you absolutely need, please know I will do anything for you,”

Your fingers bundle into the collar of his shirt absentmindedly, letting his forehead press upon yours before you dare to close the gap you are so anxiously wanting to do. His thumb now strokes your cheek, tickling your skin to the point you feel breathless.

“I don’t know what to say,” you whisper, a hushed tear dropping onto your cheek before he swipes it away.

“I just want you to be okay,”

“I am,” you try your best to sound reassuring, “Joon, I promise you I am,”

“Okay,” he whispers, and even then, you have no idea the best that is yet to come.

Sleeping cherry blossoms encircle you save for the entrance of a tunnel gleaming piercingly bright in the distance that seems so close yet so far out of reach. The iridescent shades of the petals glitter in preparation for what is to come, but your focus solely remains on the escape ahead into a world you have always dreamed of. Or is this the world you have always dreamed of? Scents of the florets waft past your nose in a way to ease you, and the lingering thought of the man clothed in white shadows the crevices of your conscious. Just the mere reminisce of him prompts his appearance and as he stands behind you in all his glory, he knows the desire looming beneath your chest for the magic you crave.

His arms reach to link around you, chin nestling on your shoulder; there is no fear for he is the only being welcome in your world of serenity. Your hands smooth upon his folded arms that remain resting against your abdomen, and forever seems to be in the forefront of your mind. Spinning within his embrace, a subtle smirk graces his mouth while your hands glide to his chest, and finally after many dreams of pining, he leans in to close the gap- snatching your lips as softly as you have imagined causing the closed petals all around the pair of you to bloom endlessly, flourishing every ounce of space the two of you may have had a fraction before. The power is within his kiss, summoning the blossoms to awaken as they are meant to. The same as he is meant to be with you.

“I miss you, too, Mom,” you smile into the phone, sifting through the mail you just checked, eyebrows furrowing when you feel as though something is missing. “Yeah- yeah, I have, I mean, yes mom, I may have a boyfriend,” you giggle, shaking your head at your persistent mother who has been dying to catch up with you since you moved. “I think- yeah, I think he may be who I’ve been waiting for,” when a knock at the door alerts you, you quickly bid your mom a farewell with the promise of calling her back tomorrow before you start work again.

Staring at the pile of mail, you wonder why the utility bill has not been sent. It is around the time that it should have arrived meaning you may need to take a short trip to the leasing office if Namjoon doesn’t mind. Giddily, you skip to look through the peephole to see him, standing tall with his slim fingers slipped into his pockets. Unlocking the door, you run a swift hand through your hair in an attempt to neaten the strands before opening the entrance. “Hey!” You breathe, gesturing for him to come in, and when the door closes, you leap into his embrace before smiling into a sweet kiss.

“Are you ready for today? The weather is beautiful out,”

“Beyond ready,” you kiss him again. The anticipation to explore another location involving nature is what you enjoy especially with someone who equally enjoys it as much as you. “But I must make a quick trip to the leasing office if that’s okay? I have Netflix if you want to chill for a bit- it shouldn’t take too long.”

Namjoon chuckles, leaning in to press a slow kiss to your lips, “Everything okay?”

“Mm yeah,” you reply in a daze, “I just haven’t received my utility bill yet and I’m concerned. Can you um, can you do that again? I may need the extra umph,”

Breathy laughter is interrupted when he kisses you again, and it takes everything in you to pull away, “Okay, I feel better now,”

“Good. Whatever it takes,”

As much as you would love to not have to pay any bills, you saunter across the road to where the leasing office lives, encompassed by sparse trees and a small swimming pool off to the side. You are happy to see Jung Hoseok, leaned on his desk, spectacles slid down his nose, and gaze distracted by whatever he is reading on the computer screen.

“Good morning,” you greet, Hoseok immediately looks to see who has walked in, gesturing with a smile toward a seat in front of his desk.

“How can I help you today?”

“Yes, um, I just went through my mail today and I realized I hadn’t received the utility bill for this month, so I wanted to check to make sure I didn’t miss anything,”

“Ah, yes, let me pull up your account here,” his fingers fly over the keyboard, the clicking noise being the only sound filling the space. “Hm, looks like it’s already been paid for.”

“Excuse me?” Confusion is evident within your voice as well as plastered upon your entire expression. “When did I? I paid it?”

“Mhm, as well as your rent for the rest of the year among all of your other bills. There’s enough money on your account to just automatically draft-”

“But I didn’t-”

“Well it says it right here,” he pokes the screen once.

“Are you able to see when the money was put in? I have no idea how-” The realization hits you suddenly prompting a small gasp.

“Er, is everything okay, Ms. [Y/N]?”

“Yeah,” you say quite breathlessly, gradually standing to your feet, the world spinning faster than you could have prepared for.

“I mean, I can ask my coworker, Taehyung if he knows anything. I got back from vacation today, so I may not have the answer for you-”

“No, no it’s okay. I- I think I know who is responsible. Thank you so much, Hoseok.”

“Anytime, dear!”

Being slightly dizzy while running is an interesting combo, but you make it to your apartment without tripping over your own two feet and you stand before the door, your chest heaving. The dreams you have been having- it all makes sense now. You wanted nothing more than a reason, or a miracle, to feel as if you were home, or where you belonged, and finally, it was given to you in the most unexpected way. When you came to Gyeongju, you had no idea that Namjoon would show up in your life and turn it into the most beautiful adventure you have ever had. You were willing to suffer through the bills if it meant being close to him, and how he figured out your hardship, you are uncertain- you always avoided the subject when it came to hardly having any money. Slowly stepping into your apartment, you click the door closed, Namjoon’s focus turning from the tv to you as he rises to his feet. You are speechless as you gaze at the man of your dreams. When he said he would do anything for you, you never imagined this.

“Whatever it takes?” You croak, hardly sure even now what to say. Namjoon will do anything to make you happy, and that is how you knew after getting to know him the past few months that you were wholeheartedly in love with him. You will spend the rest of your life trying to thank him no matter the circumstances, and as soon as his frame entangles with yours, he whispers,

“Whatever it takes.”

With all the emotion displayed from you, you drag his mouth to yours while his arms embrace you closely and warmly. His lips move so beautifully with yours that it’s mesmerizing and you feel your body fall into him. Giving him your all. You reach to unbutton his shirt, still lip locked and the way he over towers you igniting the feelings stirring even more. His lips tenderly trace your jaw while you slip off his garment and you are so entranced by him that you don’t even hear it brush the floor.

“We’re going to be late,” he whispers a tease to your mouth with a knowing smirk while you gaze at him seductively.

“I. Don’t. Care.” You say slowly and softly, slipping out of your shirt just to watch the lust fill his eyes. The way your bra cups your breasts, he can’t look away. The beauty of you and your heart- you are the most amazing human being he has ever known. Throwing an arm behind his neck, you bring him to your lips until every article of clothing is scattered among the floors. Eventually the pair of you find the bedroom where his hands gracefully slide over your body. His warm skin feels so good upon yours.

His fingers slide to your clit, delicately rubbing small circles, basking in your moans as your heat gushes. Your fingers grip his strands when he dips from your kiss to your breasts, sucking on your nipples while the tip of his tongue flicks along them, giving time to worship both. When he sees the effect it has on you, his fingers slip inside you, pumping while you moan his name. He wants you so badly, he can hardly stand it, especially with how wet you are for him.

You have no idea how much time has passed, but the moment you finish for him, he enters you, thrusting rhythmically and your moans increase like music to his ears. You could stay enveloped in his arms forever. You adore how your bodies mold together so effortlessly. When his climax is reached, you are not in any rush despite the original plans. After what he has done for you, your heaven can just be wrapped in his arms. He presses a soft kiss to your forehead, another moment you will always cling to. “I love you.” He whispers. He didn’t even have to say it. His actions whether it’s in dreams or reality are enough to know that your heart is safe.

Pairing: artist!seokjin x retail!reader, s2l!au

Pastel. Although daylight, the sun is nowhere to be as you spin, soaking in every view of the dull colors amongst the vacant field. Pinks, grays, purples and subtle yellows decorate the swaying meadow along with the sky; not a tree is present before you. The urge to run freely with the warm breeze causes you to spread your arms like a statue, your hair wistfully flowing behind your shoulders as the speed of the wind picks up. Gleefully, you skip along the land, the long pieces of grass brushing your elbows as exuberant laughter escapes your lips.

Freedom. This is what freedom feels like as you run with the air, absorbing every speck of nature you can beneath the pallid heavens. When forever seems to shorten, something in the distance stops you in your tracks. A couch. A couch adorned with a light brown blanket and a neutral, blue blanket sit in the middle of the space; the wind breezing at the hems revealing multiple trinkets such as a basket with a slice from a log nestled beside it; and, a glass bottle glistening as if the sun has decided to make an appearance. As your eyes observe the scene with parted lips, you notice a pair of books stacked with a lantern resting on top; more scattered items are noted as your eyes notice the pastel décor of round ornaments resting upon the couch.

It doesn’t stop there. The strangeness of the discovery overwhelms you, especially when your gaze lands on the back of a gray suit jacket. Broad shoulders lead to neatly shaved yet ruffled blonde hair, his head poised in the direction of what you notice as an open book between his long fingers. He doesn’t move; his bare legs from his gray shorts remain planted before him; his navy socks stop a few inches below his knees complimenting a pair of black, pointed shoes revealing a third blanket beneath them.

Wonder.

The question of who he is nips at you; and before you say a word, you step forward, the snapping of a twig causes him to jolt, turning his head to the left, about to expose-

The ding of the bell alerts that another customer has entered the store, awaking you from your thoughts as you focus on tapping along the keys of the cash register. The elderly woman gives a small smile once you hand her the change owed along with the bag of knickknacks she purchased. Returning the grin, she waves goodbye and the earlier reminder of the dream you had returns to you.

“What a strange dream,” you murmur, leaving the register for a moment to tour the small store. Your red apron rests around your waist, your white t-shirt tucked in your blue jeans as the faint squeak of your sneakers echo against the tile floor. Dainty kitchenware poses neatly along the shelves as well as numerous packages of colored silverware which brings a satisfying grin to your lips. Thankfully, customers who come into the store are respectful enough to leave items be, leaving less work for you to have to tidy up. Mini, wooden, carved figurines align another section; fake flowers decorate the rest of the aisle along with different paintings given to the shop by aspiring artists.

Cards of endearment, treasured keeps, housewarming gifts, and stuffed animals fill the rest of the building bringing an elegant feel to the atmosphere. Once your shift is over; you say a quick goodbye to your boss, driving home reminiscing on the dream you ponder could have a deeper meaning.

The hum of a bumblebee zips past your ear as the wind blows against your pale, yellow dress; strands of your hair tickle the back of your shoulders as your eyes remain locked in front of you. There isn’t a sun, but cumulus clouds cover nearly every inch of the monotone, blue sky blanketing the earth encompassing you. Long blades of grass wisp against your legs, the ticklish feel reminding you of the inclination to run freely through the landscape.

When you make the step to move forward, your feet don’t budge. In fact, the only thing moving is your hair with the breeze, not even a sound is uttered from your lips. Confusion filling you, your gaze falls upon a dim blue balloon, simply floating a few feet away, yet high enough to be out of reach. It just sits there, no movement- merely hovering above the ground, reflecting the stillness you seem to be afflicted with.

Beyond the field, the familiar figure of the blonde man enters your line of vision. This time he’s pacing, eyes glued to the book in his hands. For some reason, you do not want him to discover you, especially with the sting of embarrassment threatening to overwhelm your entire being. You can’t help yourself though as you observe the sharpness of his chin, the way his eyebrows furrow as he focuses on the words he’s reading, his thick lips whispering words you wish to hear, his toned frame along with the broadness of his shoulders peaks a delicate attraction within your chest.

The fear of him seeing you interrupts you from your stare when the reappearance of the humming bumblebee disperses your trance. With wide eyes, you try with all your might to run, but your body remains frozen at the hands of your imagination. Eyes trained on the yellow and black stripes of the insect, it flutters to the balloon, your blood running cold against the warmth of the wind. The bee lands gracefully on the balloon, taking a feel of it before sinking its stinger into the inflated material.

The loud pop pains your ears, and before you can calm yourself, you see the book fly from the man’s hands, his wide eyes finding yours before-

Sweat droplets align your forehead as the pace of your heart slows. How the fear of the man finding you took an apparent toll- it is something you don’t quite understand considering what you have awoken from was just a dream. Shaking your head, you ready for the day, throwing on your uniform and driving to your job. Once arrived, the ding of the bell notifies your manager that you have arrived, and you quickly clock in, checking on the store before customers come bustling in.

Of course, everything has remained tidy since your previous shift, so you boringly scope the aisles pausing when your eyes fall upon one of the paintings showcased on the rack. To your surprise, it’s a painting of a bumblebee. It appears to be in the process of pollination, the pastel pink of the flower petals blends in beautifully with the dark green stem making the yellow of the bee glow.

“Wow,” you breathe, running your fingertips over the smooth surface of the wings admiring the detail the artist created as the dream from last night remains subconsciously. Beside the painting, an eerie feeling overwhelms you as you gaze at a painted pale blue balloon- the string attached is nestled in the hand of a small child; the black hair on the boy’s head covers his forehead, as his other hand is tucked in his gray short’s pocket. He stands in the street of a city it appears, the pastel colors of the sky showing no sun.

“Hey, Monnie?” You call, figuring these paintings appeared in your dreams for the mere reason that you see them every day. But, how come you never truly noticed them until now?

“Yeah?” Her voice echoes from the back room where she’s finishing up a carved figurine of a tiger.

“Who is the main artist you said brings their paintings?” You wonder, your eyes never leaving the beautiful masterpiece.

“Uuuuuhhm,” she bellows in concentration, “I think his name is-”

The doorbell of the store signals that a customer or two has walked in, and the question ends up forgotten as you greet them with a wide smile.

The view before you captivates you in a different way, especially with the immense amount of land surrounding the balcony you find yourself on. Thick, white railing rests against your chest as your arms fold in front of you. The infamous wind sways your white dress as well as your hair as a dazed smile forms on your lips. You have no idea where you are, and with the way the pastel shades of the sky enchant you, it’s like you never want to wake up.

Trees are still not present, just the never-ending meadow you’ve once enjoyed running in. As you stand in awe, a presence melts into your back as large hands rest on either side of your elbows. Heartbeat quickening, you turn to face the presence revealing the blonde man, your back pressing against the railing. His face is so close the tip of his nose brushes yours. Before fear overtakes you, the tenderness in his brown eyes sets you at ease especially when the yearning to run your fingertips along the sleeves of his gray suit jacket nearly knocks the breath out of you.

He inches closer, your hands resting on his chest as your parted lips crave the touch of his. How a dream can spark such desire is beyond you, especially if this was a reality, you couldn’t imagine yourself being so infatuated with a stranger. A very handsome stranger. Before the moment can be lost, you close the tempting gap between the two of you, his lips brushing yours ever so softly. As he moves his lips with yours slowly, the sound of numerous crashing leaves fill the air as well as the heat of a rising sunray warms your back causing you to break the kiss with furrowed eyebrows. When you return your eyes to meet his, a knowing grin fills his features which leads you turning deliberately, a surprise gasp leaving your lips.

He’s the sun that makes the trees appear.

Weeks pass with not one dream of the entrancing chocolate eyes that somehow have grasped every capacity of your brain cells. You didn’t dare tell a soul of the blonde stranger in fear of someone saying that you’re crazy. Although, you feel as though your boss and friend Monnie may understand. She’s mentioned dreams before, one that led her to who she is with now. Jungkook waltzes in with a wide smile, his pink hair covering the tips of his ears and forehead, a small paper bag folded with the name of Monnie’s favorite coffee shop labeled in the center. In his other hand, lies a bouquet of her favorite flowers, the deep green of the stems causes the color of the flower petals to shine beneath the lights in the shop.

Monnie greets him with a quick hug and kiss, her smile wide as she thanks him. With quick ‘I love you’s,’ Jungkook steals one more kiss before he leaves the store, the dinging bell fading once the door closes. Monnie returns to her task at hand, and the moment that you just observed brings the loving feeling you felt with the last dream you had of the mysterious blonde man. His kiss felt so real, and without realizing, your fingertips rest on your lips as if the experience had been just that. Real.

Snapping out of your unrealistic hopes, you turn on a heel back to the register to check out a waiting customer- letting the thought of the blonde man disappear just like the thought of hoping in someone that doesn’t exist.

The field appears around you as it has many times before. You bask in the dim light, the colors remaining dull as you observe the swinging grass. Without warning, countless, pale blue balloons hover above you, in front of you, behind you- encircling you like a forest. Raising your fingertips, you touch an inflated material, the balloon drifting away from you to be out of reach. Disappointment fills you for you cannot ignore the sudden want to catch a balloon for yourself. You jog toward as many as you can, all of them floating away from you the second you reach for their strings.

Suddenly, the sun shines brightening the colors into glistening hues, and with the flying feeling of your soul, you turn to see him. Shimmering blonde hair tousled neatly on his forehead, hands tucked in the pockets of his shorts, he stands like a prince, an affectionate grin on his pink lips. You find it odd, but you have missed his company despite him being fiction, and with a jubilant smile, your eyes never leave his. The blonde man approaches you, turning his head to the side, he reaches for the string of a stray balloon, and once he closes the distance between you both, he ties the string of the balloon to your wrist, bringing your fingers to his lips as he plants tender kisses among them.

You place your palm on his cheek, the soft skin soothing as he leans more into your hand. Even with the scenery abundant around you, all you can see is him. With elegance, he moves his arms around your waist as he rests his forehead against yours. When his lips steal you, the leaves of the trees clash, reminding you of the power his presence holds. As your fingers trace the curve of his chin, you feel as though you’re floating, just like the balloons bordering the both of you amongst the sunshine and trees.

Once you rid the line of customers, the store becomes empty and you take the opportunity to gather yourself, tucking loose strands of hair behind your ears as well as straightening your red apron. Five minutes past, and you take a swig from your water bottle, swishing it in your mouth before swallowing. Twisting the lid back on, you set the bottle in the cubby underneath the register, too unmotivated to take a tour around the store.

When the ding of the bell alerts you, your eyes trail to see blonde hair. A pang hits your heart as your eyes widen, your heartbeat thudding in your temples as your mouth goes dry. No way. You watch the broad shoulders dressed in a black suit jacket turn to face you and your breath hitches in your throat.

“Hello, I’m here to see if Monnie is in need of some more paint-” He pauses suddenly, and you hope with every fiber of your being that he doesn’t observe the blush creeping onto your cheeks. Eyeing you curiously, his lips parted, he speaks, “Hey, you look- you look familiar. Do I.. know you?”

You notice the pink bow tie with a flower in the center nestled around his neck over a white dress shirt which compliments white pants covering his long legs. It takes you a moment before you realize he’s waiting for you to speak.

“Oh, um, I-” you stammer, “I’m [Y/N].” You offer your hand immediately.

“Seokjin,” He replies, his large hand accepting yours with a few shakes. An awkward moment passes as you observe his expression- he’s trying desperately to figure out where he has seen you before, and not being able to bear the awkward tension any longer, you decide to break it,

“I’m not sure if we know each other, but I think I’d like to,” you could have bitten your tongue off at your precipitous exclaim. But relief drowns you when his lips pull into a kind grin.

“I think I’d like that,” he says, “I think I’d like that very much.”

Pairing: bestfriend!jimin x collegestudent!reader, f2l!au, college!au (18+)

Tapping the end of your pencil upon any form of a desk is a habit you have vowed countless times to break, yet with your focus solely upon the daydream spinning like a pinwheel, you hardly notice the coffee eyes peering over at you. “Hey,” the jab of a pointy elbow disrupts you enough, lightly jumping at the gesture just to find your attention returning to the monotone voice of the professor. To make sure the coast is clear, you then veer your gaze to see a concerned Jimin- orange strands glisten beneath the long, rectangular lights tickling the lateral canthus’ of his eyes, and you feel an overwhelming sensation of longing, but you refuse to make it known. “Are you okay?” He mouths, leaned comfortably in his seat; you rest your chin firmly in your palm as you hold his stare.

“Yeah,” you promise, almost dazed, nodding in confirmation. It takes absolutely no effort when the minute class ends, you scramble to scoop up your textbooks, exiting the room with your best friend by your side. Picnic tables are sparse along the campus, and finding one empty, the pair of you occupy it for a few minutes before going your separate ways to the next class.

“You must be out of it,” Jimin observes, breaking the brief silence before you turn to dig into your backpack for a granola bar you have not been able to stop thinking about. Peeling off the wrapper swiftly, you offer him a piece of the snack, him lifting a quick hand gesture in rejection.

“I was up late last night,” you admit, breaking off some of the bar and popping it in your mouth.

“Please tell me you didn’t turn in the music paper late-”

“I sure did,” you chuckle at the way Jimin shakes his head at you, though the way his plump lips break out into his infamous smile, your heart skips a beat as it always does, because how can someone be so beautiful? He runs a slow hand through his hair while his eyes move to watch the surroundings,

“You live dangerously I’ll give you that. I can’t survive unless I’ve had a solid eight hours of beauty sleep.”

“No wonder why you’re so flawless,” you muse, him abruptly shifting to look at you once more, snickering in disbelief at your comment.

“Don’t lie to me,” he kids, gradually standing to his feet before he throws his arms up to stretch them; Jimin lets out a long yawn, “I think I’m going to go check on Yoongi. He’s been missing Mo a lot lately, so I’m going to keep him company. Catch you tomorrow?”

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Smiling, you are almost caught off guard from where he gently squeezes your shoulder, and the inward wish for him to stay envelops your senses much more than you want to confess, but you understand his wanting to go check on a friend who may need him. Plus, you understand how Yoongi feels because missing someone can be consuming and that is something you are remarkably familiar with.

Turning on a heel, Jimin treads to the sidewalk that leads to where his dorm room awaits, only making it halfway up the sidewalk, he spins to face you, stepping backward with a large smile he bellows, “Your birthday is coming up by the way. I know you’re not a fan of it, but you’ll have to get over it!”

“I won’t!” You lean to your side to get a better view of him, voices carrying in the light breeze.

“We’ll see,” he winks before jogging further into the distance leaving your fluttering heart in anticipation for what he has up his sleeve.

Palms along with the slight bend of your fingers clear within your vision, and your breaths slow in a strange wonder of why you are where you are. Bare feet planted along the cold, dark mush, yet there is no color to be noticed other than black and white, and you twirl your hands in awe of the dull gray painted upon your skin. Rattling trees are enhanced from the way your senses have heightened, and sporadic rumbles from the earth seem to emit in unison with flashes clouding your peripherals. The long grass of the field encompassing your frame sways, and whatever lingering shadows fade into the distance, you hardly notice anything other than that something is missing.

It does not rain, rather, lightning makes an appearance as if to signal the arrival of something… or someone. Furrowed eyebrows, you gather beyond the land a silhouette completely adorned with colors you have not been acquainted with, and as the figure no longer remains blurry, your heartbeat quickens at the sight. You watch him as he dances, leaving traces of color in his wake- every inch being shaded in behind him, completing the picture as if created just for you.

His arms are outspread, and within one of his hands holds a bubble blower which decorates the atmosphere, and upon instinct, floating bubbles hover to where you are; a giggle escaping your lips at the mere touch of one popping. Carroty tendrils gleam beneath the glowing yellow of what you see to be the sun, no sign of gray to be seen now that this soul has arrived. When he notices you, there is a halt- all is silenced, and even from what appears to be a short pace to be where he is, you have never been so fixated on the brown orbs that seem to reflect the same interest.

The two of you step to be nearer to one another, and for some reason, a nostalgia slithers its way to you exposing the urge to confess an undying secret, and as if he reads your mind, you raise your palm, him following suit before your hands press together simultaneously. Your gaze flickers to watch the way the pair of your fingers intertwine, goosebumps pleasantly spreading over your limbs, but what really captures your attention, is when you mouth,

“I need to tell you something,” because he mirrors the exact words you just whispered. His lips part as do yours, investigating each other’s gapes deeply. “I-I need to tell you something,” you repeat just to realize he is reflecting every movement you make. Stepping backward in shock, you frantically say it over and over again, “I need to tell you something. I-I need to tell you something!”

“Tell me what?” Jimin’s voice breaks through what happens to be a dream prompting you to gasp as you jolt up, pulling the covers tight to your chest. Your breathing calms as you flash a suspicious look at your amused friend, playfully reaching to shove his shoulder while the drowsiness from your slumber gradually dissipates.

“What in tarnation are you doing in my room? And, who said I had anything to tell you?”

“Listen,” Jimin chortles. “You have been talking in your sleep the past five minutes, and if I’m not mistaken, you have an urgent message to deliver to somebody.”

Scoffing jokingly, you roll your eyes, “It was just a dream. Now, get out. I need to get ready.”

Obeying, Jimin’s snickering at you as you wisp past him to prepare for your day ahead. Straightening your hair, brushing your teeth- twice, and caking on deodorant- you meet him out in the hallway, the two of you heading to your first class of the day. Little does he know, his presence always makes the pace of your heart quicken, and this is not the first time he has woken you up from sleeping. Of course, the subtle desire to wake up to him every morning huddles in the back of your mind. And as you ponder the dream you have awoken from, is it possible that Jimin has something to tell you, too? Or is it simply just a hopeless wish?

“And, Happy Birthday by the way,” Jimin’s steps slow just enough for you to notice the comical way he smirks at you.

“Don’t remind me,” you blow at a piece of stray hair that falls into your vision.

“Too late,” Stopping fully, you are astonished when his strong arms pull you into a tight embrace that the faint smell of his cologne reaches your nostrils. “It’s your birthday, and you are worth celebrating.”

“Says who,” your voice is muffled against his warm chest, your body easing into him before tightening your arms behind his back when you gently rock from side to side.

“Says me,” he cuddles you much closer, pressing his nose into your shoulder, and the way complete peace waves like an ocean over your heart, it feels indescribable, almost heavenly. But, does he feel the same, too?

“You’re going to make us late,” you murmur, although a tease, you honestly wouldn’t mind being late to class if it means being enveloped in his arms, but of course, reality hits, and he saunters behind you into the classroom when you finally find the will to pull away. If only the daunting questions didn’t produce fear, then maybe you would have admitted your feelings by now, or so you assume, but is heartbreak a risk you are willing to take?

When you reach your desk, coming down from the dazed high of Jimin’s hug, a soft gasp erupts past your parted lips, eyes widening in surprise. “You’rrre welcome,” Jimin leans into your shoulder, his smile so wide that his eyes disappear, and if you could kiss him, you would do it right now even as students start filing in to take their seats.

Sitting right at your desk enclosed in a plastic case appears to be a yellow frosted cupcake with rainbow sprinkles decorated on top. And all you can fathom is this- is this all a coincidence? Or do your dreams about Jimin have a deeper meaning that you are in denial about? Either way, you know you can’t hide your feelings forever. And as you settle into your chair, a few minutes before class is to begin, you bask in the glory of his voice as he speaks, longing for the day you can work up the courage to tell him how you truly feel.

In the middle of the meadow you stand, all hues washed away into the gloom of loneliness, yet the prickles of grass nicks your ankles, reminding you of the trees standing lifeless in the sense of no movement, hardly a sound is created. The fabric of a dress is clung between your fingers, the material scrunched in your palms, yet you loosen them upon realization that you are nowhere amid harm. Toes curl to feel the cold pad of the earth, but the air is stilled, calmed in silence, yet temperate enough to maintain comfort. You turn in time to notice a table, not far into the distance, eyeing what looks to be a small cupcake centered without anything else surrounding it.

Curiously, your slow footprints crunch the grass toward the strange discovery, and the thought of sinking your teeth into the soft dessert makes your mouth water in excitement. The crave is so strong, you wonder of the significance behind the treat, and colliding with the fossils of your memory, you cannot seem to find a reason; sprinkles sporadically embellish the swirled icing prompting you to swipe an index finger through to taste the delightful sweet of sugar now melting on your tongue. Closing your eyes, your intention is to reach for more frosting, and upon re-opening them, bewilderment overcomes you at the sight of colors blooming on every horizon, painting along to even reveal the deep mahogany of the table. Tilting your head, you notice something is missing, and unexpectedly, the blur of clementine strands enters your peripherals causing you to whip your vision to see the man you have met in prior slumbers, mischievously grinning at you.

Squinting at him in response, a mere smirk arises on your lips, wondering what he has in store, but he is not the only one who has a trick or two hidden away in his sleeves. Trailing down from his expression, you see that in his hands lays the cupcake, the wip of yellow frosting you pilfered evident from its once perfected layer. Wind happens to miraculously exist when you hear the subtle rattle of leaves, your hair tickling the backs of your shoulders where the tinge of sunrays are felt, and you find it endearing that when he is present, so is the world you truly seek.

He gestures the dessert to you, and instead of taking another bite, you catch him by surprise when you return the baked good to the table. Watching you carefully, the spark of another desire looms along your mind where your arms raise for your hands to place gently on his shoulders. Brown irises flicker to read your expression, and when he prepares to lean in, tip of his nose daintily brushing yours- you suddenly jolt, laughter reverberating throughout the atmosphere when he widens his eyes before leaning back to release the same boisterous sound, your running frame igniting him to follow suit. He chases after you playfully as you cavort through the land, sneaking glimpses behind you to see how close he is. He never misses a step, arms outreached to catch you panging frequent squeals of glee to escape from your smiling lips, but he misses every time as you dodge into the opposite direction, he least expected. A short time passes underneath the fervor of the sunlight resonating amongst the scene, the light of it all serenading the pair of you into a wonderland you never imagined would welcome you with such happiness.

When he manages to round his arms around your frame, your feet fly out from under you causing the two of you to tumble- rolling together down a lush hill until the pace slows. He hovers above you, each of your chests rising and falling with the same exhilaration before bursting into the same merriment that gifted the surroundings with joy. The tips of his feathery, orange hair tickles your forehead from how near his proximity is, and his expression softens in the hopes of continuing where it was originally left off. When he leans in, without warning, with what strength you have, you turn to pin him down, giggling at his startled, yet amused glance. His smile is the most beautiful smile you have ever known, him shaking his head at you for accomplishing the trickery he had not seen coming.

Gazing down at him, your hair falls from your shoulders to lightly touch the sides of his face, and you feel the comfort of his hands nestle on your back. Your fingertips glide to hold his face, his dancing eyes lighting your heart- everything about him finalizes you in every aspect- the missing puzzle piece you have longed for- the sunshine to your rainy day. And, no matter what, you will never look away.

Bubbles swarm the universe in a glistening cascade when your lips finally meet, creating the power of what the two of you hold for each other, and one thing rings mesmerizingly clear:

He is the rainbow that conquers every storm.

One thing you contemplated from the moment your eyes fluttered open to the gold tinged spin of your ceiling fan was whether you were going to refuse to move until the anxious weight over your shoulders disappears, or get your ass out of bed and finally tell Jimin how you feel. Now, the answer to the hounding question happens to be blatantly clear because in front of the door, you stand, heart profusely thumping. The door that your best friend, unbeknownst of your arrival, lives behind stares back at you as if it is laughing, taunting you to make up your mind. Mumbling profanities to yourself in frustration, you lightly pace from side to side, scolding yourself while you nip at your fingernails, begging inwardly to get a grip.

Uncertain of how many minutes faded into time, you shake your head, pausing to inhale deeply and exhale slowly, slamming your eyes shut as you try to steady your quivering hands. Feet planting in front of the door, you suck in your lips, before reaching to knock. It is only seconds when you hear the familiar bellow of Jimin calling to someone, most likely Yoongi, letting him know that he is getting the door. The anticipation is smothering even when you attempt to ease your breathing, and when the door opens you feel your heart leap.

Jimin’s eyes light up in sheer happiness when the recognition evident in his eyes sees that it is you, “[Y/N]? I didn’t know you were coming. Couldn’t get enough of me could you-”

“Jimin, I’m in love you with you.”

The words tumbled from your mouth before you even had the chance to comprehend it; Jimin’s stare enlarging along with his jaw that drops in astonishment. Clenching your teeth, you don’t even give him a chance to respond, rather, you dash past him, nearing to the bookshelf that holds an ungodly amount of college textbooks mingled with sparse figurines- the door to his bedroom only being a few feet away, holds memories of numerous homework filled evenings and crumpled paper balls the pair of you would throw at each other out of boredom. It takes an immense amount of bravery to collect the words you are not only wanting to say but needing to say when you finally spin around to meet his face as he slowly closes the front door behind him. His shoulders are tense while his thick lips rest in a straight line, but that doesn’t stop you.

“I can’t take it anymore,” you confess, your heart tearing at his face that remains unreadable, “I’ve waited so long to tell you this; and honestly, I never thought I’d see the day that I would, but here I am,” you gesture your arms swiftly in the air as if to signify your existence, “Jimin, I am so in love with you that I can’t even think straight. Literally, you smile, and I feel like I’m going to combust into the oblivion!” Wince. You have never been good at being cheesy because what is cheese without something to spice it up a tad; and what the hell is a confession of love without some questionable statements? “And, who gave you the right to be so sweet and thoughtful, and to pretty much have all of the qualities I’ve always wanted in a man. I see you almost every day, and yet, I miss you like I haven’t seen you in a month! We balance each other out so precisely that it terrifies me, and I don’t think there is anyone in this world I would rather be with. I mean seriously, Jimin, I would give the last half of my brain cell just so you could have a whole one!” You hate the fact that your eyes are welling with tears, but your emotions are pouring out, and at this point, forget the spice, “Even when my world is at its gloomiest, I’m reminded of yet another promising color you represent, it’s like you paint every picture around me so perfectly that there’s no such thing as flaws.” Because he has always accepted you for who you are. “And, for goodness sakes, even when I think I’ve had enough of you, you appear in my damn dreams, like I can’t-”

Jimin crashes his lips to yours not even giving you an opportunity to recuperate, his gesture so rapid, yet so potent, your back thuds against the bookshelf where sounds of trinkets swivel without plummeting to the floor, but either of you could care less. Deepening his kiss, your fingers slide to tangle with the plumy tufts of his hair while his remain cupping your face with not one plan of ever letting you go. The way your heart had gone from an intimidating beat to an effortless wave of soaring is beyond you, and when you dreamed of kissing him, you never thought you would ever really get to. Sparks igniting beneath your chest is more than an explanation, it’s a sensation you are finally experiencing, because the man you have been hopelessly in love with is completing the other half of your heart in this very moment.

Everything you have ever dreamed of is unfolding before you in the blink of an eye, and when he breaks the kiss, his forehead touches yours whilst he runs the tip of his thumb at the corner of your mouth. “I fell in love with you the moment I met you,” all emotion resonates from his brown eyes, “Plus, you’re fun to tease, I mean how could I resist?” You shove him as he snickers, you’ll show him a tease.

“Oh yeah?” You arch an eyebrow in attempt to challenge him, his face scrunched adorably, before your shoulders slump, “Oh! Goodness, Jimin, just kiss me!”

Chuckling into the kiss, it doesn’t take long before breaths are starting to increase, especially when his hands grip your hips in order to pull you closer. This time when you snatch his lips roughly, he sneaks a quick brush of his tongue over yours kindling the urge for you to graze his bottom lip between your teeth. “Shit,” he moans, and the mere second you feel his bulge against your stomach, the suppressed desires inside you start coming alive. No words are exchanged, both of your hands still bundling in his shirt, you drag him to his bedroom, him following without a second thought. Shutting the door, his cologne scent wafts in every part of his room, the fan blowing cool air above, you twist him around, him stumbling backward while your hands on his chest guide him.

His eyes never leave your face, even when you push him onto his bed, moving your knees on either side of him to straddle- his hands moving to grip your ass while you lean into him, him relishing in the feel of your breasts before you grasp his chin. A look of mere surprise fills his eyes while you seductively tilt your head, tracing his jawline with your stare, the gush warming your core causes you to grind your hips along his- with the way he feels about you, he will do anything you say.

“Mmm,” his grin moving to kiss your neck, “What have I gotten myself into?”

A hearty snicker leaves your lips, “How about you let me show you?”

“Oh, fuck,” his shoulders relax especially when you run your lips along his jaw, nipping his ear lobe, your warm breath causing him to shiver, his hair tickling your nose signaling to let the tufts tangle between your fingers, bringing your lips to his, holding his kiss before he parts them just enough to greet your tongue once again with the tip of his. Both hips grinding, the longing for the feel of his skin is what you want next. Lips locked, your fingertips trace from his jaw down his neck to carefully swirling along the tops of his shoulders.

When he moves to tug at the bottom of your shirt, you stop him, “Nuh uh uh uh,” you taunt, “I believe I want to see you first,” Jimin moves his hands almost immediately in mock defense which leads you to interlace your fingers with his, a loving look forming within his eyes, you laying him down just to steal a few more long kisses before jerking his shirt off- you rising to rest on your knees while he basks in all your glory. He is so toned, and you can hardly contain yourself, running your fingers along his abdomen, his chest rising and falling rapidly from just your touch. Gradually, you break the trance by giving him a toying smirk, running your hands along your body before lifting your shirt above your head, exposing your red laced bralette, his eyes widening at the sight, him nearly floored by the beauty he has yet to see. The next step you take is tracing the top of your jeans until your fingertips slowly unbutton, unzipping to reveal a matching lace thong, a soft moan escaping Jimin’s throat while his legs tense under you from the indisputable feeling hounding him below.

“You okay there, Chim?” Your voice so sexy, it can haunt any ones’ dreams, but in the loveliest way possible. He runs a hand through his hair though his back is still pressed against his pillows. “Need a little help there?”

“Oh, [Y/N],” he breathes, “I am more than okay,”

He can barely withhold himself from stealing your frame, tearing off your lingerie and sexing you right then and there, but he also is enjoying every bit of your movements, your dominant gaze, the way you hold yourself, pleasing him with the mystery you have yet to expose. Without another moment for him to ponder, you bring your hands to the button of his pants, replaying the slow way you unbutton them, unzipping them, and pulling them down his quivering legs- tossing his pants and underwear onto the ground where your clothes now lay.

Salivating at the view, your hands grip his thighs, him hissing in response. He wants you so bad, all it does is add fuel to the flaming yearn to please him. You begin. Sucking so hard, he lifts slightly, his breathing staggering while you lap your tongue along his tip, diving in once more, his taste lingering in your mouth, his hands moving to your head while you move up and down, his moans are music to your ears, and he could finish right now, but you’re not ready for him to. Lifting to rest on your knees again, you gesture for him to rise- him still recovering from the ecstasy of your mouth, he watches you- you letting him palm your bra, leaving tender kisses along your cleavage, his lips causing your heat to clench, especially when you kiss him again- this time unhurriedly- letting desire take over especially with the way his lips mold with yours- so lovingly, so passionate.

He wants to make you feel good, you can tell by the way his fingers move to slip into your underwear, gliding along your sopping entrance, his eyes nearly rolling back in his head with how turned on you are for him. “Ohhh, fuck,” he exhales, his forehead meeting your chest while you grip his shoulders. Him pumping his fingers within you, you run your hand to the back of his head, gripping the orange strands, but not to the point to cause any pain, you tug just enough to get him to meet your stare, his eyes squeezing from how much that mere gesture turned him on even more than he already is.

Slanting your head knowingly, you speak, “Wanna taste?”

He whispers, “So bad. So so bad,”

Pinning him down, his fingers released from your entrance, you whip around to where your back faces him, his heated hands smoothing along your ass, appreciating the thong flooding his line of vision, him then moving it out of the way so he can take in the sight of your drenched heat the moment you bend forward. Swaying your hips from side to side, you give him another minute – him moving his hands to grip the front of your thighs.

That’s when you hear it, the parting of his lips before the tip of his tongue swipes along your entrance. “Mmmm,” you moan, him spreading your folds in order to give another long lick before he hungrily flicks his tongue along your clit- savoring the taste he’s longed for the second you two shut his bedroom door. “Oh, Jiminnn,” your voice sounds higher from the way the shivers wave across your body- him sashaying his tongue relentlessly on your entrance, building the feeling to the point you can come at any time.

He nearly melts the moment you begin to pleasure him too, stealing his erection with your mouth, sucking while he licks simultaneously- the both of your moans drowning out the noise of anything outside the room. When you feel the brink of an orgasm about to take its course, you spring forward, grasping his area within your palm, you rise and fall to fill your entrance with all of him. He can’t even comprehend, he just lets you ride him, getting lost in the feeling of being inside you, his breath hitching at the sight of your figure dancing on top of him.

Though he is in love with your body, the perfection of your curves, your beautiful mannerisms, and your glistening eyes- nothing beats the fact how in love he is with your heart of gold, the way your smile lights up any room you walk into, your determination to complete any goal you have listed on your heart, or the way you stole his heart the second you were introduced to him. Jimin is in love with you.

Jimin is in love with all of you.

Every single bit.

His hands move to your hips, lifting you to move you under him. You’re astonished at first, him hovering above you, his hand cupping your cheek for his thumb to stroke it. Both of your pants are heard though the moment is nowhere near lost. “God, you’re so beautiful,” you murmur. Awe dawns his expression, him moving to rest his forehead upon yours, his hair shading his eyes, his bare legs tangling with yours, his heated skin soothing among yours. It’s clear the two of you have a chemistry that neither of you can put into words.

“I love you so much,” he whispers, pressing a tepid kiss to the corner of your mouth.

“And, I love you so much,”

Jimin kisses you- sultry and steamy- relighting the fumes of desire- your gasping breaths mingling with the whirling of your tongues until he brings his penis to your heat- thrusting in you whilst your fingers scratch down his back. Time passes before the climax begins, you muffle your screams into his shoulder, him releasing in you once both of you finish. The sensitivity reeling- he collapses beside you- your hand immediately finding his, intertwining your fingers before turning to flash him a musing look. “Sex like that, I don’t think I’ll ever leave,” you wink.

“If you keep looking at me like you want a round two, I don’t think I’ll let you,” he chortles. Slipping under the covers, your laughing smile buries partly into his chest, while you shake your head at him, but at the same time you are coming down from a solace you never thought could be possible. You let a few minutes pass by first, stifling a smile,

“Oh, um… Jimin?”

“Hm,” he hums, eyebrows furrowing as he peers down at you in concern.

“If you ever buy me a cupcake again, I will smush it in your face.”

Lips breaking out into a huge smile, he chuckles at you incredulously, “Bring it on,” and with that, his fingers tip your chin, pressing a sweet kiss to your mouth, completing you like the sun to the sky, the greenery to a meadow, the icing to a cupcake,

A rainbow after a long and treacherous storm.

Pairing: barista!hoseok x nurse!reader, s2l!au

There’s a distinct familiarity in the air, one of flawless breezes and thrilly jingles from a bell hung upon the door to your favorite coffee shop that is nestled downtown in the center of your city. The strong aroma of freshly brewed liquid warms you just enough to where your arms wrap around your frame- the loose hems of your cashmere sweater cuddle the majority of your palms while the sensation of your purse settles along your thigh. It’s been a while since you’ve been here, and with the usual crave of your preferred drink, it’s only fitting, especially with the way the deep shades of red mingle with dim, orange hues which enlighten the reminder that autumn has finally arrived.

Glittery leaves decorate the railings within the building matching the colors of the signs promoting the return of the infamous pumpkin spice latte- one you have tried many times, yet you can’t seem to completely veer away from your steaming mug of lemon tea. It’s always been made at its best, and it serves the swarming memories of long nights after work when your relative would fix you a cup every night to help calm you after an eventful day of securing medicine at a nursing home.

Raking cold fingers through your hair, you take your place in line, nearing the counter before the frilly, brown tendrils of a male seem to catch you by surprise. His pink lips are already settled into a grin while he takes the card payment from the person in front of you embellishing small dimples that add to the glimmering brown in his almond eyes. Your heart seems to react almost immediately prompting heat to rush to your rosy cheeks sparking small shivers to curse your fingertips.

His digits tap at the keys rapidly before his eyes greet yours with the same kind smile he shares to others, “Good morning, what can I get for you today?”

You’re too stunned for words to form fast enough, stuttering the order you usually never struggle to say, “I- erm, lemon tea, please. For here,” your eyes instinctively fall to your fumbling hands unzipping your bag in goal of grabbing your wallet. Once cash is gripped between your quivering fingers, your timorous stare catches the bold letters adorning his nametag before feeling the swift brush of his touch gathering the change from you.

“Coming right up!”

The incredible amount of consciousness it takes to not trip over your feet on the tread to find a table baffles you prompting a quiet giggle to yourself, yet the budding attraction to the employee doesn’t disappear in an instant. Rather, you suppress the thought just enough to focus on the skidding chair before comfortably settling in the favored corner adjacent to the large window revealing a pleasant blanket of gray clouds hovering the evidence of rain. Something about panging droplets upon a roof has always brought serenity in times you’ve needed it most; days can seem shorter especially when dealing with humanity, and since today happens to be a rare day off- you will enjoy every minute if possible.

Hands now folded beneath your chin, you get lost in the view outside- sauntering pedestrians preparing their umbrellas with the occasional swaying maple leaves captured by the wind to press their stems along the cement before being retaken to fly elsewhere. And let’s not forget the extra fabric swaddling frames now with the expectation of the weather cooling- nothing seems to beat your favorite season- the quiet facade it brings to your soul, or the assemblage of colors that define the entire fall as a whole.

The distraction is nearly exhilarating that you jump almost immediately when a tall shadow enters your peripherals, “Your lemon tea, ma’am.” He must not have caught your wide-eyed gaze for the gentle clink of the plate holding the steaming mug of your order now rests before you.

“Th-thank you, Sir,” peaking at his name tag once again, you grin up at him, “Hoseok,” he bows at your words, smiling from ear to ear just to flash a beautiful set of teeth, his hair slightly falling into his eyes, and here you are swearing inwardly that he is the most beautiful encounter you have ever witnessed. Though frequenting this place, you have never seen him until now, which sparks the question on whether he is new to solely the store, or to this town in general. Hoseok returns to the registers faster than you realize, eyes still lingering just for you to avert your gape to your tea- curling your fingers around the glass to warm them.

You’re a quarter of the way finished with your drink when you lose track of time, sighing softly, you wonder what your friend Sofia and her boyfriend, Taehyung have been up to as of late, wishing you could free more time enough to visit. Last you heard, Taehyung proposed, and Sofia has been planning their big day ever since. You don’t expect it, the dispersing of your thoughts when you notice the uniformed individual that has gained your attention the minute you stepped into this building, to swiftly move to a spot far enough away to where you can safely observe him.

His stare remains glued to his phone, a jacket folded over his arm- he seems highly concentrated on whoever he’s texting, yet all you can do is focus on how handsome he is. You want to speak to him considering the possibility he may be on break, but piling enough courage to do so is a tad intimidating, and you are definitely unaware by the length of time your gaze has remained on Hoseok, that he glimpses above his phone screen, your heart skipping from being caught just to drop your lids to the now empty mug cradled in your hands. GAH, the scold your brain is rampaging is enough to make you want to wince, telling yourself numerously that you need to be more careful.

The travel home seems faster than usual, but with the greeting of Bram, your Jack Russell mix, you’re very grateful to make it to your house. He pants excitingly while his paws swipe your knees with each jump. “Hello, my sweetheart,” you coo, rubbing along his fluffy fur where a black spot covers the majority of his back. Your dog is your everything, so the joy of cuddling him close the rest of the evening until you slip into slumber is always your favorite end to a rainy night.

Pat, pat, pat. Darkness loses to the fluttering of your eyelids now being gifted with the essence of the season you’ve been dreaming about. Pat, pat, pat. A droplet here and there heightens your auditory senses while you remain halted in place; bare feet press along the cold pavement that has been freshly rained upon placing myriads of glued leaves on almost every inch of the road. Rows of long trunks host autumn hues that rustle lightly from the chilly wind now drifting past your shoulders where feather touches of your hair barely tickle.

You’re uncertain of why everything seems blurry as though it’s not real, yet the excitement of such an ideal setting is enough to start the promenading of the street- pouncing in the air with the clack of your ankles, squeals of glee escaping whilst you twirl- the deep shade of your maroon dress flowing from the movement, blending in with the surroundings. Lost in a world of utter peace, there are no rules here other than happiness, and that’s a world you’ve always longed for.

Reaching a curve, the joyful tune brewing from your lips softens the very second your stare lands upon a silhouette in the distance. The figure isn’t facing you, but you notice enough to realize he’s alone- brown strands hidden within a faded orange beanie, he’s nestled upon the grass with crossed legs, hands placed before him that appear to be fiddling with something, but at the angle, you are standing, all you can gather other than his presence are items clearing to be a journal and a pen resting by his side.

Curiosity consumes you enough to proceed forward, tiptoeing nearer to figure if he might be someone you have seen before, but one thing you did not anticipate is the sudden crunch of the leaves- ones that must have freshly fallen from the side of the trees that have not been kissed by the rain startling you producing a sudden gasp- widening eyes lifting to reveal the turn of his face-

“Sh- !” Sitting up immediately in your bed, perspiration lingering the lining of your hair- the hyped beat of your heart pounds into your temples before you brush the loosened streaks from your vision; Bram instinctively pounces to lick your face in desperation to calm you, curling onto your lap the second your hand gently smooths among the top of his head. It’s been a week since you’ve been to the coffee shop, and though everything was merely a dream, you can’t help the doting incentive that the person who arrived happens to be the same individual you can’t seem to easily forget about. It’s strange to you, but there’s just something about him, and before you know it, as soon as your shift ends for the day, you find yourself entering the store in hopes that the employee of your dreams, you inwardly tease, is awaiting to serve you another request of your favorite drink. To your delight, he is working, and to add to your giddiness, the place is fairly empty meaning no lines for you to wait in.

“Hello, how are you today?” Hoseok’s hands wrap around the sides of the register- his smile captivating you as it did last time to the point that timidness takes over- the blush in your cheeks revealing itself as soon as you reach the counter.

“Work,”

“Oh,” he giggles, although, your response was mouthed before you could have stopped yourself and you wince at how you may have sounded considering he’s currently in the process of working himself.

“I’m sorry, I meant, I-”

“Well, in that case, how about some lemon tea? If I’m correct?”

You’re stunned by how well his memory must be, and the way his eyes squint in concentration in hopes that he’s right melts your heart, “Ye-yes, for here,”

“Alright,” he chuckles, punching in the order, “Coming right up. My treat,”

“Wait what? No, no, you don’t have to do that-”

“I understand how tough it can be,” he raises his hands as if in defense, “It’s my treat, remind me of your name?” He arches an eyebrow when he presses his lips together.

“[Y/N],” you smile, still in awe of the kindness he has surprised you with after such a brutal day of work, “Thank you. Really, thank you,”

“Anytime,” his voice is tender, and you can hardly express your gratitude though you wonder if its the wrinkled fabric of your scrubs with random decor of stains that gave way of how your day has gone that potentially caused the reason of his gesture. Either way, you’re floored, and when he brings you the lemon tea, you thank him again, the heat of your skin still burning red.

Pelt, pelt, pelt. Fingers curl to reveal the plush of a blanket laying beneath you while the sun protrudes brightly through the trees. The careful turn of your head discovers the encompassing of plump pumpkins- perfumes of apple spice sweep past your nostrils while your vision explores the scenery. Confusion creases at the corner of your eyes, wondering where you must be considering this is a fantasy you have yet to venture. Pelt, pelt, pelt. Droplets of rain spring off your skin sporadically, but not enough to linger for you to remember it exists.

“Hello,” though merely a soft murmur, the unexpected sound jolts you to sit up, a gasp flying from your mouth staring at the apologetic eyes of the man who realizes he has scared you. Relief floods your bones- gaze falling to the journal and pen planted beside him as before. There’s the persistent curiosity revolving around the book, but more so, your stare returns to the oval face of the timorous human now staring at his twiddling hands in shame.

He doesn’t have to be ashamed, and the desperate aura to prove this to him prompts you into action. You are unaware of how near the proximity to him is when you mirror his stature of crossed legs- your knees pressing to his once the desire to feel his slim fingers between yours forces you to hope that he can’t read your mind. It’s only your imagination, right? It is not like he truly will know of the courage you yearn to live in reality. In substantiality, trust is a process for you- learning another is a task in itself for you- but in slumber, there’s a certain bravery you collect especially when this moment feels so right.

His lips are parted just as yours are- enlarged-eyed nerves form magic as real as the season living out in this universe. There’s no more waiting- it just happens in the spur of a second where you kiss him, his hands finding their homes on either side of your face, leaning more into you. Rapidly, nature seems to know the cue when leaves swirl in the wind encircling the pair of you in a painted cascade of red, yellow and orange. Your jaw is loved by the slow traces of his fingertips, returning to rest your back upon the blanket where his body aligns with yours, and despite this fiction playing effortlessly in your conscious, you feel his smile against your lips the same as he feels yours. And with that, there’s nothing you want more than this dream to become a truth.

“You’re not crazy, love,” Sofia promises on the other line of the phone though you have a stubborn notion of not believing her statement, “I think you just have a wee little crush on a certain barista,”

Currently shuffling to unlock your car, you’re ready to head home from work to check on your dog, hoping he’s kept the house in good shape while you’ve been gone, “But how though? I don’t even know the guy.”

“Distant crushes are real, hun,”

“I don’t know,” you heave a long sigh, the back of your head resting upon the cushion of the driver’s side, hardly bringing yourself to start your vehicle just yet.

“Have you… Talked to him since the last time?”

“....No.”

“I should have known,” Sofia groans, “You are the most stubborn soul I know, and you wouldn’t be you if you weren’t,”

“I learn from the best,” you tease, laughter between you and your best friend making the air seem lighter than earlier.

“That, you do. Be safe and keep me updated. Tell little Bram I love him,”

“Will do,” you pact, thankful to hear her voice. The journey home reminds you of a few trails hidden away in a park behind your house. Maybe over the weekend, you can visit to find an ounce of solitude in nature, otherwise, the plan of a small nap is in your best interest, so the abrupt minute you find, you flip on the tv for some background noise, eventually drifting into the familiar sound of rain beginning another daydream with your sweet Bram cuddled by your side.

There it is. The familiar corner where you’ve turned in previous times that relives the journey of precise coloration reigniting the joy that sparks the padding of anxious footsteps into the direction of what may be awaiting. The preface of your wonderment is where you are now- you are right at the very start of autumn hues rustling in tall trees aligned accordingly on either side of the paved road glimmering pasted leaves under your heels. A hounding prolepsis of hope gives the concept that someone is indeed here, and you must find him before it’s too late.

Elation turns into tattered fear of losing to waking in reality, speeding your steps though you feel you are going nowhere. A loss of time can ruin the means of opportunity and when your skipping legs finally reach the curve, you pause- a building smile spreading across your face at the man standing before you. Head cast downward, he’s penning within his journal, fully concentrating on whatever he is writing. Inching closer, he closes the journal- a thin thread of a golden bookmark keeps a tab on where he last written. His tender gaze holds yours for what feels like forever until he turns his journal to you flashing a loving grin that exuberates permission for you to open to the page he’s left for you.

Uncertainty of hesitation only shows in the flicker of your eyes studying his heart that he’s wearing on his sleeve. Gradually, you grab at the end of the bookmark between your fingertips, lifting the first half of the book to unveil a message that brings touched tears to your eyes.

Scribbled in the center of the page in artistically drawn bold letters are the words you have longed for, but never knew you needed,

‘You’re my favorite part of every season’

It’s been a month since you’ve seen him; a month since you’ve had the dreams; and a month since you’ve been able to enjoy the soothing taste of a tepid cup of lemon tea. Carried away by the hours of your job, it has been difficult to provide any time for yourself- leading your brain to the point of forgetting about the interests you’ve once had prior. The trails have been calling your name consistently to the point you find the will to go, zipping your coat to then huddling your hands within the pockets. Twenty minutes pass until the breaking of the path comes into view, and out of a habit, you hum a random tune to the chilly breeze, swaying your shoulders until the leap of your heart stops you in your tracks.

A beanie- faded to match the season, yet this time he’s not looking down, he’s staring out into the trees where birds sing in unison with chirping crickets, and to your rigid frame, your eyes scan the spot where you always found them: a journal and pen rested by his side as they always have. You cannot speak, for whatever is happening before you is real, and you attempt to decipher the possibility of this being just that: real. You want to run, but why cower when the chance is right there within your reach?

Hoseok hears your steps that you do not comprehend that you’re making, yet you don’t stop; a smile exists on your lips shining from your eyes that meet his that beam recognition,

“Hey there!” He stands from the blanket he’s been sitting on, smiling from ear to ear while offering his hand to shake yours, “It’s been a long time!”

You’re flattered by his noticing of your vacancy, and at the feel of his large hand enveloping yours, you briefly shake it, still shocked by the event screening in front of you, “Hello to you! I didn’t know you came here?”

“As often as I can,” he nods, turning his head to absorb the atmosphere around him, “It’s quite comforting,”

“That, it is,” you agree, gape dropping to your shoes, “It’s my favorite place to go this time of year,”

“I’d have to say it’s the same for me, too,” an awkward silence seems like an eternity when it only lasts for about five seconds leading to the clearing of Hoseok’s throat, “How have you been? We miss seeing you at the shop,”

“I’ve been well, I hope you are,” you giggle, gesturing toward the blanket spread upon the grass, “Is it okay if I join you?”

“Of course you can!” His voice sounds so happy. Happiness that lifts the hope you now have embraced. Hoseok politely reaches for your hand to help you sit down, each of you crossing your legs to get comfortable to notice his fingertips have yet to leave yours. At first, the nervous tension of question shows on his face when he finally makes the connection, yet you nod the okay, sliding your palm to mold with his. Neither of you let go, and maybe you have not been the only one shaken by his countenance, for his heart is thrumming in equal pace as yours. As the hours pass by, you find yourself nestled into his side where he rests his cheek upon your head, watching the leaves of the season fall into place just as this moment: the start of a dream come true.

Pairing: model!taehyung x female!reader, s2l!au

Immense.

The sound of the waves spread along the sand, the rushing water crashing in motion against the wind. Shades of blue cover the sky where the sun is sitting at its highest peak, running along the ocean making the deep indigo glisten beneath its rays. Heat covers every centimeter of your skin, but you wouldn’t trade it for the world, especially with the feel of the warm sand grazing between your toes. The shift of palm tree leaves is nearly deafened by the sea, and you lift your chin to the sky leaning back on the palms of your hands soaking in as much beauty of your surroundings as you can.

As the wind picks up, your hair sways in the direction of it, tickling your shoulder in the process. If you could choose your Heaven, this is where it would be, and as if the echoes of the ocean are beckoning you, you find yourself striding in the sand, the slow pace of your movement silent with each step. You’re nowhere to be heard, nowhere to be seen, nowhere to be endangered, just you and the shore enjoying each other’s company.

As you further along the seaside, something in the distance catches your attention, causing you to steady in place. He stares in front of him with his face raised slightly toward the sky, dark hair covers his head ending at the nape of his neck, pink lips are parted as his bronze skin glows along with the sun, a red necklace decorating his neck. Your eyes trail to see he’s dressed in loose, white clothing with slim black lines checkering the entire outfit complimenting a blue, thin fabric of a coat relying on his shoulders as it sways in the breeze. His arms are blanketed within the coat- his hands buried in his pockets.

Slanting your head, you can’t help but stare- especially with the curve of his jawline bringing a desire to you that you don’t understand. With a tinge of chagrin, you hope he can’t read your mind. With the tendency of dreams never going the way one would hope, you avoid expecting the worst. Instead, you merely glimpse at the person ahead of you wondering how someone with such beauty could captivate you the way the ocean does.

When you think you’re safe at the distance you are, the male suddenly looks in your direction catching your gaze-

The sun greets you through the window, the mattress beneath your back summoning you to slip back into the covers as you notice the shadow of the blinds are dancing along your bed. Blearily, you force yourself to sit up, sucking in a slow breath, reaching your arms above your head to stretch. The waves outside engulf you with inner peace as you lean back against the bed frame.

For a whole year you saved enough money to travel to the opposite end of where you live, so you could vacation at the beach you’ve always dreamed of. The recovering feeling from your dream still lingers, and you shake it away, swinging your legs over the bed and jogging to the bathroom to brush your teeth and prepare for the rest of the day. Walking along the beach is comforting, especially with the atmosphere filled with laughter, slaps to a volleyball, the inflating of beach balls, chirping of seagulls, the setting up of beach chairs and padding footsteps along the sand.

The coast has been your dream escape since you were a kid, and now that you have raised enough money, you took off a month of work to simply be alone and bask in the world you deem as paradise. As the wind wafts along your skin, a grin tugs at your lips once you settle onto your beach towel, letting the ocean resonate your auditory senses drifting you into a bliss you could relax in for eternity.

Purple tones are visible in the blue sky, white buildings nearly blind your vision as glimpses of green palm tree leaves align the coastline in the distance. Small pebbles of gray gravel are spread in a thin layer beneath your feet and to your left stands a black gate, encircling you in a vista you do not recognize. Far different from what you expected, yet the heat of the sun remains the same, giving a shimmer to your skin that you have yet to grow used to.

As you raise your eyes to look in front of you, the jolt of your heart causes your eyes to expand as the silhouette of the dashing man from your previous fantasy is now standing a few feet away. Much closer than he was before, his jaw is set as he continues to stare in front of him. His hair barely wisps in the breeze, but its long enough to evoke the inward longing to run your fingers in it; his countenance so alluring, you fight the urge to waltz toward him, letting the splendor of his stature overcome you. When you think he is oblivious to your gape, he catches your eyes, a silent chuckle escapes him as he looks down for a second to then returning his eyes to yours- a side smirk present on his lips. His whole body faces you now, his hands still in the pockets of the same outfit he wore before, the blue coat still blowing with the calm breeze.

You’re motionless as he approaches you, confidence leaking from his expression as his deep brown eyes bare into your soul, and yet you can’t look away. You won’t. As he nears you, there is only one question remaining on your mind,

“Who are you?” except no voice from you is uttered but mouthed as you search his eyes.

“Yours,” he mouths, reaching his fingertips to tuck a strand of your hair behind your ear still holding your widen gaze, “I’m yours.”

You pace along the living space of the condo, your fingertips against your lips as you chew at the side of your cheek. As much as you’d love to tour the beach, you’re more in the mood of air condition for the moment contemplating on what to eat for lunch as you admire the sunshine once more. Nearly a week down of vacation, and you have never felt so at peace as you do right now. Walking towards where the television is set, you reach for the remote, pressing the ‘on’ button until the screen comes to life. Letting the voices of whatever show is playing fill the silent space as you turn on a heel to prepare lunch.

Once your food is made, you return to the living room setting the food on the coffee table before you. Taking a quick look at the screen, you realize a fashion show must be going on as a beautiful model flashing a gorgeous, red dress struts back to behind the stage probably shedding off her clothes to redress in another outfit. Taking a quick bite of your lunch, you then return your eyes to the screen when everything in the room goes silent.

The food in your mouth suddenly has a foul taste as nausea wells in the pit of your stomach. Your eyes are fixated before you as you watch the man from your dreams walk down the stage adorning the outfit you have seen multiple times already- his stance so professional as he poses a few times, his eyes never leaving the camera until he turns to walk to the back of the runway, disappearing backstage. Your heart is pounding as shock overpowers you- did you happen to see him before? Was there any ounce of familiarity when he first appeared in your dreams? Uncertainty is evident in your expression as you refuse to turn away from the tv screen. To your relief, he visits the stage again, but in another outfit, and when letters flash at the corner of the screen, you lean forward reading them aloud,

“Kim Taehyung.”

Bright- so bright that the bed covers, walls and furniture bring such a clean aura to the atmosphere even with the love being made below the sunrays casting shadows along his skin. His lips are smooth as he breathes against your mouth- so caring with the emotion that your head is spinning. His fingertips run along the bare skin of your back, soothing your soul as he then trails his lips along the side of your neck to your shoulder, your face nestling in his hair absorbing every bit of him as he returns to touch his lips to your cheeks, nose, eyelids, forehead- cherishing all he adores of you one kiss at a time.

When he steals your lips once more, your fingers tangle with the feathery tufts of his hair, his strong arms wrapping around you, his warm chest pressing against yours, the bliss so enthralling you never want it to end. When you break the kiss, all is silenced. Not a word is said, not even a breath is heard, but when the desire of his kiss burns within you, you crash your lips to his, the waves outside roaring so loud it’s as if a storm is approaching. The rush of the currents matches the adrenaline taking over your mind and the indisputable pounding of the both of your hearts as the two of you get lost in each other like the sounds of the trees when the tide kicks in.

The energy of his existence flashes so many yearnings that even you can’t comprehend; even the want for a forever with someone that you’ve never considered before- especially with this stranger who enticed you the moment you laid eyes on him- standing beside the one place you’ve longed for a getaway to since you were young. You dare not break his kiss as he moves to hover above you, stroking your cheek with his thumb as you move your hands to his shoulders. As the two of you slip under the covers, you let the power of the waves drown out the fear of you waking up- for now, all you wish for is to remain entangled with Taehyung to the music of the sea.

The smile on your lips when you awake doesn’t come to a surprise especially with the ‘lovey’ feel you discover rising beneath your chest. How a model you have never met on a tv screen can attract you in such a way is beyond you, but with dreams like that, you will gladly fall asleep all the time. Preparing for the day, you decide to go to the boardwalk of the beach and roam along the shops seeing if anything catches your eyes. The heat of the sun is welcoming especially once you tread in the direction of the shops- enjoying the rays tinging your darkening skin. You applied suntan lotion before you left, and the smell of it lingers as you continue the path.

People pass you from left and right nodding polite smiles as you return them; but, one person causes you to pause- and immediately, you turn to look behind you. Blinking, the figure you thought you saw is no longer there and you shake your head to rid of the thought and let out a soft giggle. “You’ve gone mad,” you whisper, ignoring the curious looks of the individuals who noticed your strange veneer. When the evening approaches, you unfold your new purchases and settle them into your suitcase, throwing on some clean pajamas and sliding under the covers, letting the waves drift you into a snooze.

The howling of the wind attacks the ocean, but not one wave erupts. You are standing in the middle of the enormous blue, the sky a dimming gray, as the end of your white dress flutters away from your ankles with the breeze. Your eyes search around you, every direction vacant of a single soul, and as you scream, not one sound escapes. You’re longing to be free- somewhere the sand burns the bottom of your feet and the ocean cools your skin as you twirl within the water. You’re longing for someone- a rescuer- a peace.

When you think all hope is lost, a soft pang of light metal hits your chest and your fingers fly to feel a necklace being hooked behind your neck. Eyes widening, mouth agape, your eyes stare at the red string, the circle piece dangling from the necklace holds a letter- the first letter of your name. Realization dawns on you as tears brim your eyes. You turn around briefly- your eyes meeting the brown orbs of Taehyung.

Suddenly, the wind completely stops, and all is hushed. Sun rays appear out of nowhere, the serene view taking over your senses. A gentle smile forms on his lips, your heart melting as a loving grin tugs at the corner of yours. He wore a necklace with the initial of your first name everywhere he went to remind himself of his devotion to you. When he nods toward the circle piece between your fingertips, you realize there must be more engraved. Slowly turning the piece over- italicized words appear causing you to gasp, bringing your hand to cover your mouth:

‘My love for you runs deeper than the sea,

and endless as the ocean’

Returning your gaze to him, you fly into his arms- his grip tightening just enough to keep you pressed to him- his pounding heart so strong you can feel it against your chest. As wide smiles adorn the both of your faces, he sets you down, your feet returning to the water as you nestle your hand on the back of his neck. With one more passionate gaze, you capture his lips with yours- the waves explode all around- crashing in every direction, yet the only thing showering the two of you is the mist from the currents as they swallow each other with every roar.

A recurring trip to the boardwalk the following morning is no surprise to you since the urge to have another shopping trip won its case, and here you are. Your sun hat protects your eyes from the sunlight as you admire your outfit of choice for the day, letting the beautiful dream you had the night before fade into the back of your mind. Gazing into the windows of the shops, you click your tongue trying to avoid being indecisive and just waltz into a store- but, most of the shops you had seen yesterday, and now the choices of ones you haven’t been in quite yet have lessened.

Ambling across the pavement, your eyes stay focused to the stores until you suddenly bump into someone.

“Oh!” You say, the sound of something clinging the pavement causes your heart to drop. “Oh, I’m so sorry!” You breathe, raising your arms in front of you to help the stranger. He bends down to retrieve a pair of sunglasses, examines them, then folds them to hang from the front of his shirt. Before you get a chance to comprehend what just happened, he turns his face, his eyes snatching yours. “Taehyung,” you whisper, and he arches an eyebrow in confusion, his lips pursed as if he’s going to speak. In panic, you shake your head, “You’re Kim Taehyung. I saw the fashion show the other day. Very- um, - very suave.” You say it without thinking, and as he utters a small chuckle, his expression softens, and you could kick yourself. Suave!? Who in the tropical islands at 11 in the AM says suave!?

“Why, thank you,” he nods, and you try to calm your trembling hands. “May I ask your name?”

“[Y/N],” you say instantaneously as your eyes shoot up to meet his- you gulp when the familiar tug of his smile embellishes his lips, “My name’s [Y/N].”

“Well,” he wets his lips, “Since you seem to already know a little bit about me, what do you say that I get to know you? I’m heading to walk the beach if you’d like to come?”

You hold his gaze as a warm smile and giddy feeling overwhelms you, “My schedule’s clear,” you say, and the two of you, shoulders brushing, continue in the direction of the seashore- eventually strolling along the beach until a blanket of stars hovers above the ocean- endless as the journey the two of you will endeavor.

Pairing: boyfriend!yoongi x collegestudent!reader, establishedrelationship!au, college!au (18+)

Vacant.Swirls of orange-brown dunes flood your line of vision, the heat grossly seen resonating in the air, your skin tinged by the sun rays, the humidity suffocating. Parched, your eyes scan the vacant desert, nothing in sight other than the pale blue sky holding only the sun and howling winds causing your hair to fly wildly behind you. You’re longing for something- anything to quench the thirst clinging at the back of your throat. Stepping forward, the burning sensation cooling when each foot raises momentarily, you leave your footprints behind, fingers gripping the dry material of your grit stained dress, your eyes squinting in protection against the loose sand panging your being.

You’ve been here before in this very place. Desperately searching for whatever is needed to satisfy this torturous yearn. The wind still blazing, your jaw clenches in determination, you tread up the dunes, legs aching from the effort of reaching the top, sand drowning your ankles. It feels if an eternity has taken place until your eyes peer at an image in the distance.

A leafless tree sits- limp and lifeless- brittle branches swaying, the color dark compared to the pulsating color of the surroundings. You try to clear your vision, just enough to discover you’re not alone. Blonde hair drenched and clinging to his forehead, your heart halts when you notice him leaned against the tree, body weak, arms flaccid on either side of his frail frame, thin lips cracked from lack of moisture, eyes glued shut from exhaustion.

Fear grips every bone in your body, eyes enlarging when you let out what’s supposed to be an ear-piercing scream, but you’re mute. You want to run to him. You want to save him, but your feet will only carry you so far. And, as you move, it’s like the mirage before you drift further away, his silhouette so out of reach- with an outstretched hand, you fight to make it to him- he tilts his head, fluttering his eyelids just enough to see who-

“You’ll see him soon,” your friend, Em, assures you, a grin decorating her lips, “If I were you, I wouldn’t worry about it.” She pats your shoulder before scurrying off, leaving you alone on the trampoline outside of your parents’ house. You will be attending a community college just a few miles up the road, yet the excitement of starting classes leading you into your future career path isn’t the only thing on your mind.

“I just miss him,” you whisper, crossing your legs, scraping at the black material that has already stained your bare feet. Your final day with him before he left was spent with the two of you laughing- jumping on the trampoline until your legs gave out- both of you collapsing side by side, his fingers intertwining with yours once your eyes locked. You miss his smile more than he will ever know, and the longing to feel his warmth never dims, the anticipation to hear his voice lingering in the back of your mind once you hop onto the ground, sauntering to your room to check your phone.

Sparse cactuses trail the horizon, the sun appearing just beyond a gray mountain- strands of cirrus clouds are evident in the bright blue- blanketing over the famine that you are amid. Tumbleweeds roll along the land swiping your gaze, the dirt beneath your feet crunch with each step, your hands bundling in the front of your dress. The earth is quiet, not even a shift of the wind is heard, yet you search for the one thing that will satiate the thirsting obsessing within your soul. The temperature increases causing beads of sweat to align your forehead, your journey cut short when your gaze falls upon a pink flower nestled above round cacti.

Puzzled, you approach the plant, the petals vibrant beneath the sun rays, yet the beauty of such thing enchants you just enough that you reach to stroke the smooth floret. The fragrance brings serenity you have wished for, your senses coming alive with each sniff. That’s when a sound floods your aural canals beckoning you to widen your eyes in a well-needed hope.

Trickling water, as if a fountain in a pond, serenades your ears the moment you straighten your stance. Eyes perusing the scape, the direction of it seems to come from only one place. Whirling around, your hand flies to your chest, vocalization knocked from you, the thrumming of your heart beating at the figure standing a few feet away. His head cast downward, you swallow, reaching a trembling hand toward his feeble frame, his arms drooping on either side, curiosity engulfing you with each movement in his direction, the dribbling water loudening as you inch closer. He doesn’t budge. Not until your hand rests firmly on his shoulder causing him to jolt, wide brown eyes hold your-

“Awe, not again,” you whine through the phone screen, Yoongi chuckling, a black mouth mask covering most of his chin, blonde strands covering his forehead beneath a black beanie.

“I’m sorry, babe. Jimin wants to play a game,” he smiles, your heart swelling at the way his eyes light up when he sees your face.

“Well, tell Jimin to shove the game up his-”

“Come again?” Jimin appears over Yoongi’s shoulder, a bright smile plastered along his face- his eyes nearly closed shut from how wide it is.

Shaking your head, “I said what I said,” you shrug, “Carrot head.”

“Hey, be nice, he’s fragile,” Yoongi kids, Jimin playfully punching his arm, you stifle a snicker.

“Same goes for you, Lemons.”

Yoongi clucks his tongue at you, swaying from side to side in his rolling chair, Jimin’s chuckle muffled behind the screen as he walks away the moment a brief sound is heard. You observe Yoongi’s confused expression as he swivels to face his bedroom door. “I got it!” Jimin calls back.

“Is someone there?” You furrow your eyebrows, Yoongi turning to face his phone camera again.

“Not sure who. We’re not expecting anyone,” you watch your boyfriend pause glimpsing behind him- a loud thump on the wall signals him to stand- closing his bedroom door then returning to finish his conversation with you, “I don’t think it’s Namjoon.”

From the way Yoongi’s laughing, you agree, “What is Namjoon up to nowadays?” You wonder, heck, you wonder what’s been up with everyone these days. Your friend who visited you the night before leaving to visit her boyfriend Hoseok at the coffee shop he works at- also talking about an art show the two were invited to by her other best friend who is dating a famous pastel artist by the name of Seokjin- and your dear friend Jungkook has finally found the love of his life who happens to be the boss of the girl who is dating Seokjin. Not to mention Seokjin is best friends with a popular model by the name of Taehyung who happens to be dating a girl you graduated high school with a year or so ago.

“He’s been visiting the park a lot, honestly I think he’s found someone, too,” Yoongi replies, scratching at the back of his neck. When an awkward silence comes between you two, you can’t help but pick at your fingernails, wishing for nothing more than to be in the arms of your constant. “I miss you,” his voice is in a whisper, tears brimming your eyes.

“I miss you, too Yoons. So much.”

When the two of you end the video call, you slip under the covers, fighting the tears threatening to spill onto the stuffed animal Yoongi gifted you before he left for college.

Cracked yellow dust spreads along the terrestrial view- nonentity in sight. Sun blaring profusely in the sky, the deprivation of the ground abundant, you can hardly breathe with the heat leaving then re-entering your lungs. Your tongue suffers with your boiling skin, aching for a stream, maybe even a waterfall of happiness to suppress this never-ending thirst plaguing you with every fantasy you’ve dreamed.

When the flowing water greets your ears again, you pant, turning immediately to see his face. Lips parted, with weak eyes he holds your gaze, shoulders slumped, yet he wills himself to you gradually, your hands instinctively reaching to cup his face in desperation to heal him. When his warm hands gently hold your wrists, he searches your mind, gathering what all he can, eyes flickering to your lips. With a hint of a smile, though fatigue weighs heavy, you capture his lips almost impulsively, the gentleness sending waves of elation from your fingertips to your toes. A pang of a droplet mashes off your forehead, the two of you pulling away with knitted eyebrows, your breath hitching the second you feel another one hit the top of your hand.

Multiple pangs hit the ground encircling the two of you, the dimming of the sun apparent, you look toward the sky to see strands of gray clouds hovering over the earth. As if nature reads your mind, rain instantly pounds the ground, soaking every millimeter of the scenery bringing triumphant smiles on you and the man’s faces, a joyful laugh escaping him as the water refreshes your cooling silhouettes. When you meet his stare again, he pulls you in, kissing you even harder than before, his hands entangling in your soaked hair.

All you can think, lip locked with the miracle standing before you, getting lost in this fantasy with you is,

he’s the rain that overcomes the scarcest drought.

It’s been a month since you’ve seen him. Packing up your bookbag, you sling it in the back seat, making your way to the driver’s side, igniting the engine before heading onto the road to home. Oddly enough, Yoongi hasn’t texted you all morning which is highly unlike him. With it being Friday though, you assume maybe he has a test this morning he hasn’t finished up. Or, maybe he’s having a talk with a professor about a homework assignment he needs clarification on. Many thoughts are running through your mind, and even when you make it home, cleaning your room and tidying up the house for your mom, you every now and then glance at your phone, just for your heart to fall every time.

Though it’s late afternoon, you yawn in frustration, trying to avoid the overbearing worries wanting to overtake your mind. Instead, you force yourself to take a break, burying your body underneath the covers, far enough to where your head is comfortably nestled on your pillow. Though you plan to just lay there in the silence, slumber sneaks up on you, your eyelids shutting in hopes of forgetting about the sadness echoing in your heart.

Crickets chirp all around intermingled with frequent yelps from coyotes making their presence known underneath the extensive night holding a myriad of stars. The wind breezes above your frames, warm fingers interlaced with yours, backs pressed to the cooled dirt letting the music of the cicadas bring comfort to the atmosphere. You’ve never been so at peace, not in the desert with the answer to diminish the turmoil resting beside you. Cacti stand tall through out the area, their spikes glistening beneath the moon, pink and yellow flowers adorning the tips of their arms, small clumps of vegetation ornamenting in between.

Though the constellations above pique your awareness, there’s nothing you want more than to gaze at the heavenly being whose eyes have yet to leave you ever since your dream began. Timidly, you return his gape, squeezing his fingers lovingly, feeling the tip of his thumb smoothing over the back of your hand. If this is what it’s like to be whole again, then there is no way you want to lose it. When a fond smirk embellishes his thin lips, your hand trails along his chest, you move to hover above him, his hands immediately resting at the base of your back the second your lips brush his. Cupping his cheeks, you feel his hair between your fingers, the sensation of his kiss quenching every craving you’ve ever had for water, especially when rain drops quid the terrain- showering both of you without warning. Neither of you mind, in fact, both of you remain tangled in fauna, getting lost in each other’s kiss, and getting lost in endless time.

Your eyes are welcomed by the night outside your window prompting you to groggily sit up, rubbing at your eyes whilst letting out a long yawn. Running to the restroom, you freshen up, brushing your teeth and walking to the living room to realize your mother left a note saying her and your dad will be home late. The nap you took seems to have helped with the fatigue you felt earlier, and though you have the urge to check your phone, you decide against it, pouring yourself a glass of your favorite drink and nestling onto the couch.

When the doorbell sounds, your eyebrows crease, you set your drink aside, cautiously walking to the door, your heart thudding even in your temples. Opening the door, you nearly shout with excitement, for standing before you, is none other than your boyfriend, Min Yoongi, with a bouquet of deep red roses staring right back at you.

“Oh my god, Yoongi!” You squeal, him chuckling as you crash into his arms. He spins you around once, letting your feet settle onto the ground with your face buried deep into his chest as he sways you from side to side. The crinkling from the plastic covering the stems of the roses is hardly heard while you rattle off, emotions escaping from all sides, “I was so upset because I hadn’t heard from you all day and I was worried and I just wanted to cry and-”You barely get a breath in from your rant to the point you didn’t notice him inching close to you, pressing his lips to yours, silencing you suddenly. Gasping lightly between his kiss, you melt into his embrace, getting entranced by how much you have missed him.

When he pulls away, he rests his forehead against yours, “I wanted to surprise you.”

“Well,” you retort, refusing to take your eyes off his handsome face, “Mission accomplished. I haven’t showered and we approximately have 41 minutes until my parents potentially come home.”

Yoongi laughs as he holds you again. “Alrighty, I’ll be waiting.” He kisses your temple before heading to the living room. Your heart is swollen with excitement that your boyfriend is finally back.

Hot water pangs along your shivering skin, roasting your frame just enough to make the goosebumps wave among your limbs when you finally enter the shower. The shampoo drizzles down your shoulders, your fingers brushing through your soaked hair while you cleanse your body from the long sleep prior to Yoongi’s unexpected arrival. It doesn’t take long before you’re wrapped in a towel, trying to be conscious of the time before your parents get home. The ends of your hair cling to your shoulders while the cool air wisps across your exposed shoulders and legs. Looking into the mirror, you swiftly run a hairbrush through the mild tangles to then waltzing into your bedroom to sift through your drawers for clean pajamas.

You nearly gasp in surprise when thin fingers drape from behind you, burying his nose within your freshly cleaned hair. “Well, you surprised me once and now it’s twice,” You tilt your head, a smile spreading across your face as you melt into his arms. Yoongi moves to press his cheek to the side of your neck, his strands tickling your skin while he sways you gently from side to side.

“I just really missed you,” he whispers, moving his lips to press against the corner of your jaw. With opposite college schedules, sometimes it’s hard for the two of you to spend quality time together. Yoongi pecks another warm kiss along your shoulder which distracts you just enough for your words to melt on your tongue. “I just can’t get enough of you,” he squeezes you once, your heart fluttering at his sweet words.

“Mmm,” you moan dreamily, “I concur,”

It’s then you crave the love you two haven’t been able to make in what feels like forever and if your correct, you may now have 25 minutes until your parents get home; prodding your fingertips along Yoongi’s hands, you soothingly tickle at his skin, carefully swaying your ass against his growing erection. When a tepid, pout of a kiss greets the back of your neck, tingles broad every millimeter of your skin, a light hum sounding from your lips. Your heat squeezes with anticipation, especially when Yoongi undoes your towel to where it plops to the ground. With his large, heated hands he slowly palms along your hips until his fingertips rest above your clit; his other hand sliding to your breasts, his middle finger and thumb circling along your nipples while he simultaneously massages your throbbing sense; your head leans back to rest upon his shoulder. Eyes closing in immense enjoyment, you can’t help but moan his name, “Yoooongi,” especially with the budding arousal arising within your core. Yoongi’s lips trace your neck in very detailed, seductive kisses; slipping his vibrating fingers to dive in the ocean flowing between your folds causing him to lean his hips into your ass; the feel of his erection prompting you to bite your bottom lip, a sly smirk forming while he continues to pleasure you.

Abruptly turning to face him, you help him out of his clothes, crouching to your knees to pull off his pants; his warm skin knocking the breath out of you as the two of you envelop each other in a sultry embrace; his lips finding yours almost immediately; parting and relocking in such a fast pace, you’re hardly containing yourself, especially when you tighten your arms behind his neck just to relish in the feel of each of your naked chests pressing together to intensify the paradise you two so easily bestow on one another.

“Holy shit, I’ve really fucking missed you,” Yoongi breathes, his tongue brushing yours before snatching your lips once again, his hands moving to squeeze your ass before slamming your back against the dresser drawers. A high-pitched gasp releases from your agape mouth, his fingers slide within your walls, curling slightly to find your g-spot, your eyes rolling back while he pumps; your slippery folds tempting to bring him to his knees, especially when you bring your hand to his being, gliding rapidly up and down. His lips pause against yours, breaths panting in unison from the growing climax, but it’s only the beginning. You want to be on the bed, and you want him underneath you without any doubt.

It doesn’t take long for him to read your mind, especially when you shove him toward the bed, him crawling backward before he collapses onto the pillows. Your heat comfortably sits upon his erection, grinding slowly for a tease while he groans in response. Arousing him arouses you, and when your hands knowingly soothe along his abdomen, your mouth waters at his light tufts sticking to the perspiration forming along the line of his forehead. His jaw clenches to control himself from sexing you so rough that you’ll forget your name; yet, he enjoys taking his time, making sure you’re enjoying every bit of this as much as he is.

His fingertips rest on your knuckles that have chosen a spot to rest on his thighs; when your head moves in view of his being, your eyes widen in excitement before hungrily licking along his shaft. He jolts his being unintentional as a slow, deep moan of pleasure leaves his heaving lips. He knows that you know exactly what you’re planning to do; grazing your tongue effortlessly along his tip, you tighten your lips over the head, taking one, long suck before accepting all he is within your mouth. “Holy shit, [Y/N],” he exhales, your head bobbing up and down numerously, not breaking away anytime soon, drooling all over his being whilst sucking; the salty taste of his precum igniting a hunger in you that you didn’t realize you missed. Once his erection is drenched from your skilled mouth, you hover above him to steal a few more sloppy kisses, tongues pirouetting in perfect sync- when he hears your gasps, he rises suddenly, to move to reposition behind you-you remaining on your hands and knees, but he does the opposite of what you expect. His fingers spread your folds as your scent drowns him in ecstasy.

Your core clenches before its greeted by the harsh swivels of his tongue; your arms weakening from the sensation before he shoves his tongue within your vaginal walls, pumping profusely until your thighs tremble in return. Licking with the tip of his tongue he returns to flick it along your vaginal lips, glorifying in your screams of delight, beckoning him to continue, sucking your clit in multiple streaks, an orgasm building to the point you become increasingly light-headed.

“Yoongi,” you moan, so breathless from how brilliant he performs his tricks, your climax wanting to peak, but you stop him, “Yoongi, please,” you beg, ready to be fucked so hard you forget where you are, “Yoongi,” your pleas are about to be answered. When your back bounces among the mattress, Yoongi hooks your legs over his shoulders one at a time before bringing the head of his erection to your heat. Your entrance is moving instantaneously with your pulse, yearning and yearning to be satisfied. Without any hesitation, Yoongi dives inside you, thrusting severely within your core- his being so deep within you, your head is reeling from how incredible he feels, pounding vigorously to the point you can’t catch a breath. Your liquids forming between your thighs cover his erection with every stroke, his hair swaying over his eyes while he performs his task; the two of you so enchanted by the way your bodies fit; the way the halves of your hearts fit; the way your hands intertwine perfectly, the way you two so naturally complete every aspect of each other. The love both of you hold for one another is endless.

When the climax peaks, you whimper his name, your legs tensing from the powerful jolt leading to sensitivity plaguing your entrance. Yoongi spills into you, his hips jerking. His release melting onto your inner thighs, him crashing beside you; both hyperventilating with accomplished smiles adorning your faces.

“Wow,” you breathe, “I think you need to surprise me more often,” turning on your side, before snaking your leg over his waist. His fingers move to trace the side of your arm, him inching closer to press a loving kiss upon your lips. Staring into his brown eyes, you whisper, “I’ve missed you so much,” and really that’s all you two can explain; because no matter where either of you are; even if you’re in separate rooms, there’s nothing that compares to the anticipation of getting to be within each other’s arms, cherishing countenances and kissing away the fear of losing a love that will never be lost.

Now you have approximately five minutes to get dressed.

Pairing: animalrehabilitator!jungkook x flowershop!reader, s2l!au

Vegetation. Red tomatoes dangle from their stems in countless rows before you, encircled by thick, plush trees. The vegetation surrounding the scene abundant that the sun barely shines above it instead remains covered leaving shadows of swaying leaves along the ground. Yellow butterflies flutter amongst the grass, landing on colorful flowers spread across the land. Faintly, you hear cautious hooves rummaging through the forest, the movements lightly crunch along the piles of leaves though you hardly register what it may be. Taking a step forward, your fingertips brush one of the shiny, plump fruits, the red glistening beneath what little sun is protruding through.

The dirt beneath your feet indents leaving a trail of your journey behind you. Gazing at the tomatoes, you’re in awe of how a simple seed can grow into something so beautiful along with many other plants that enrapture your soul. When the field of tomatoes seems to come to an end, a bright light piques your attention, your feet shifting onto freshly mowed grass. Something about the light really draws you in, especially with it nearly blinding you. Inwardly, you urge yourself to continue forward, your hand resting above your forehead to dim some of the brightness.

A large tree appears in your vision once your eyes adjust, mossy patches gather along the end of the trunk, a gray stone rests above where the tree roots are buried deep into the earth. Your eyes pan over the sight until they land upon a figure dawned in white clothing, back leaned against the stone, fingers fiddling with what looks to be a flower. You tilt your head, consumed with the way his eyes remain focused on the floret, his thin lips murmuring to himself with each petal he removes, them swaying to the ground or onto his raised knees, and noting his soft pink hair waving on his forehead and long enough to cover the tips of his ears.

The entire moment is angelic to you. Heavenly in a sense. His countenance without the knowledge of your presence moves you to the point you want to call his name. If only, you realize, you knew it. When he reaches the final petal, you instinctively step forward, your lips parted in preparation to speak when the jolt of a doe breaks your concentration, the boy lifting his head with widened eyes, turning to see who has entered-

Running a few errands, you forgot to bring a water bottle along with you which primes you to run by a dollar store with the plan of purchasing water as well as a few other things before returning home. For some reason, you are extremely thirsty today, the summer sun hasn’t given a break enough to be able to breathe properly. Either way, you’re thankful for your day off, though you can’t wait to return to work tomorrow. The greenhouse you work in on the weekends has been a dream, holding numerous flowers, other buildings holding different vegetables or fruits, a backyard filled with a cornfield and a strawberry field- the plantation so immense that it gained popularity from the folks living in your small town. Every employee is assigned certain positions. Yours happens to be with the flowers, though your coworkers love surprising you with baskets of vegetables or fruit whenever there’s a lot left over after the harvests.

Monday through Thursday though, you work in an antique shop as a manager. You’re the biggest workaholic you know, but art, plants, and the realms of nature have been your passions your whole life. Walking along the isles, you finish retrieving what little items you need, and you head to the register. You’re uncertain of why your head feels so foggy, but once you pay for your items, you waltz out the door, zipping your wallet and placing it in your pocket.

“Ma’am!” Someone calls, “Ma’am wait!”

It takes you a moment to realize that the deep voice is calling for you. Turning around, you see someone approaching you, waving an arm in the air until they capture your attention, the sound of a plastic bag clashing with each step.

“Sorry, ma’am. You left this,” Your eyes land on the bag holding the items you just bought. Embarrassment immediately flooding your features.

“Oh, my word,” you breathe, reaching for the bag, “Thank you so much, I can’t believe I left without-”

Your heart halts when the familiarity of the man’s pink hair floods your vision. Bright, brown eyes meet yours, your shoulders tensing at the recognition of his face. Someone that appeared in your dreams the night before.

“It’s no problem at all,” He smiles, his eyes timidly keep your gaze, his hand falling to the side once the bag is hanging from your stiff digits.

With a terse nod, you grin, “I hope you have a nice day.” Your heart pounds as you brisk to your car, the strangeness of the whole situation nearly floors you. Have you seen him before? Is that why he somehow crept into your dreams? Either way, you buckle your seatbelt, igniting the engine and driving toward your home, brushing off the whole thing as nothing more than just a mere coincidence.

Maize stalks aim for the sky, the leaves tickling your figure with the light breeze whisking between the greenery. The golden cobs peek from where they’re held, the sky a light blue as cirrostratus clouds hover in sight. Your fingertips brush the smooth, yet numerous rows of kernels amazed by the beauty of such a grain- how they grow in rows to feed the world along with many other plants. You spring forward, skipping through the cornfield to find an entrance to the shining light ahead. When you find yourself exiting your previous adventure, the scene before you is breathtaking- the sun brightening the earth as you notice the vacant tree with the stone sitting next to it appearing in your peripherals.

What captures your vision brings a small smile on your parted lips. A lone doe grazes along the grass, her light brown fur evident amongst the colors of plantation. As if aware, she raises her head, flicking her ears as the wind picks up- her black nose twitches, abruptly turning her head to meet your entranced stare. The doe stiffens at the discovery of your company, but remains in place, firmly planted in the one dwelling where she feels safe.

“It’s okay,” you try to speak, but no words are heard- raising your hand just enough to show her you will not do anything to hurt her. The doe’s eyes stay locked on your countenance, even when pink flower petals softly brush your skin. With furrowed eyebrows, you lift your head to see a shower of them falling from the sky in slow motion, covering the terrain like a blanket of snow. When you turn to find the doe, she’s gone. Your assumption is she skittishly ran away which brings an ache to your heart, but you understand her instinct for flight. The sunlight trails to the tree and stone- beyond them your eyes see him. The silhouette dressed in white- his back facing you, yellow butterflies sparsely cling to his clothing, their wings fluttering just enough to enchant the air with their magic. When his figure shifts, you see his hands are raised in front of his chest, his fingers poised as you see two butterflies resting on them. His vision never leaves their beating wings, smiling down at them with the mindset of friendship. You want nothing more than to join him, basking in the glory of the sunshine and the gentle nature of the butterflies, the frolicking of deer in the yonder fields, and catching flower petals replacing rain.

You watch him carefully, not realizing the forward motion you’re making. Nearing him, a butterfly flutters from his shoulder to fly in your direction, the man turns to follow the insect - eyes enlarging in surprise when he sees who its travelling to-

Watering the daisy section brings the conversant scent of water and dirt, a fragrance you never want to lose. Reds, pinks, yellows, blues, and purples brighten the greenhouse, a few fans above bring a cooling breeze to the plants, along with relief from the humidity lingering outside. You love the smell of plants which is why you’re thankful you only work here on weekends, that way everything remains fresh with every shift. You saunter to the rose section, taking a whiff of one of the deep red emblems with a smile spreading across your face. You’re so mesmerized by the essence; you hardly notice the door closing signifying a customer is in the midst. You reach to sniff a pink rose this time, a low hum sounding in your throat.

“Hello, I came to see if-”

Your hand flies to your chest as your eyes widen- the thrumming of your heart evident.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” the deep voice says, which then you apologize for jumping like you did. When you raise your head to meet the customer, you freeze. It’s the same person who not only appears in your dreams but is also the same person who rescued you from leaving purchased items behind.

“It’s okay,” you reply, gaining your composure, “How can I help you?” You smile, trying to ignore the faint attraction withering within you. You notice he squints his eyes at you in wonderment, trying to figure out where he may have seen you.

“You’re the one from yesterday,” he then says, snapping his fingers then shyly chuckling, not meaning to avoid your question, “I remember now. I didn’t know you work here.”

“Just on weekends,” you nod, your demeanor timid when he tilts his head with interest.

“Are you in college?”

“Oh no, this is actually my second job. I’m a manager of an antique shop,” you mention, then pondering what brings this handsome stranger to the greenhouse of all places. “What about you?”

“I work at a wildlife rehab center.” He grins, your eyebrows raising in surprise, “I work with animals that have been injured, or animals that were found abandoned as neonates, so we raise or rehabilitate them until they can be released.”

“That’s- that’s amazing,” you stutter, the memory of your latest vision clouding your mind. The face of the doe flashes, and you can’t help the astonishment on how much your dreams of this stranger align with his reality.

“Recently, we released a doe we rehabilitated from a wounded leg,” he murmurs, sadness in his brown eyes as he slips his hands in his pockets. “I just hope she doesn’t go through anything like that again.” You’re uncertain of what to say other than apologizing once again, though you’re very happy to hear of her healing, also hoping she remains in good shape and health for the rest of her life. “By the way, I’m Jungkook.” He offers his hand, formally introducing himself.

“I’m [Y/N],” you say, firmly gripping his warm hand in yours with a swift shake.

“Sorry, for the distraction. As far as why I’m here, I’m wanting to send a floral arrangement to my mom’s work.” He grins, revealing what flowers he would like and rattling off the address as you swiftly type up everything, packaging the flowers neatly, and Jungkook signing the store copy of his receipt.

Before he turns to leave, he glances at you one more time, his diffident expression imaging yours,

“It’s very nice to meet you.”

You’re flattered especially when he slightly bows in respect to you.

“It’s very nice to meet you, too,” you bow in return, Jungkook nodding sweetly, soon disappearing out the door, your thumping heart still echoing in the atmosphere.

Strawberries. Vertical lines of strawberries decorate the ground, the triangular shaped fruits appetizing as you prick one loose from its stem, the sweet taste of it satisfying as you close your eyes. You’re not sure how many you’ve eaten, but you can’t seem to get enough as you follow through the field until you reach the opening where the meadow no longer bears fruit. Your lips are stained pink from the binge, though you can’t see it, you can feel it, especially when the craving for more remains on your mind.

Glancing ahead, you pause, your smile widening at two deer frolicking a distance away from you. The two playing at each other as they bounce in different directions- completely in their own little world unbeknownst of your presence. When a tap on your shoulder causes you to gasp, you whirl around to see the wide-eyed gaze of the pink haired gentleman. Apologetically, he stares at you, his lips parted for he didn’t mean to frighten you. Bringing a finger to your lips, he follows your gaze to the deer dancing behind you, his heart melting along with yours at the view.

When you turn to face him once again, it’s like the world around the two of you disappears, just two individuals lost in a large world, yet held together by the nature that brings happiness to each of your lives. He raises his hand, swallowing in fear, gently settling his palm along your cheek, the softness of his skin soothing to you as your fingertips brush his wrist. He inches closer, pausing just enough to where his breath sweeps along your lips, the desire building nearly knocking you off your feet.

When you close your eyes waiting for his kiss, he speaks,

“Love me or love me not-”

You’ve always been incredibly shy. Which is something you’ve accepted about yourself a long time ago; you decide as you carve at the wood you’ve been working on the past week. It’s starting to resemble a deer, the ones appearing in your dreams almost every night since your first dream about Jungkook. Your coworker is tidying up the floor, taking care of customers, checking in on you from time to time to make sure your current projects are turning out the way you’ve hoped. As you whittle at the timber, you smile fondly at it, proud at the detail you’re able to create.

It’s just- as you twirl the current piece in your hand, you elect to not sell it. Instead, you originally created this project with a different intention. Courage revealing itself, you finally conclude that you’re no longer going to cower. Taking a quick break, you lean back in your chair, excited for the following weekend to arrive.

Shrubbery surrounds you though in the distance clusters of blueberries bring a peaceful feel to the ether, the dark blue reflecting beautifully with the green stems. You sprint toward the fruit, the sun following you as you twirl with the heat of the breeze. Monarch butterflies flap their orange wings, swarms of them tackling the bushes to enhance the scenery with their aura. If rain existed in this world, you’d never know, not with the sun bringing such a euphoric feel to this world you love to escape to.

Laughing joyously, you skip through the blueberry field until you appear in the meadow, the grass tickling your ankles, your heart searching for the constant who gives you a sense of sanity. Without missing a step, you turn to see him, shining so vividly in his white attire, you’re nearly breathless when you reach him, tapping his shoulder, him facing you with wide eyes- he relaxes when he sees it’s you. He gulps, shifting his gaze momentarily before returning to meet yours.

There’s nothing you want more than him. This longing for him doesn’t make any sense with him being a stranger, but when do visions from deep slumber ever do? You reach for his hand, resting his palm upon your cheek, him closing the gap between you two just enough to where the tip of his nose brushes your cheek. You know what’s coming when his lips part, but it’s not a kiss he’s about to give,

“Love me or love me not?” he mouths, but you don’t answer with words.

Instead, you smile, reaching your free hand to cup his cheek, leaving a soft peck on his lips. In that one second, something powerful astounds you, and you pull away breathless. Without hesitation, he kisses you again, the trampling of a multitude of hooves sound in the distance, the rush prevailing like the bravery exuberating from you. Kissing him once more, both of your hearts beating to the rhythm of the hooves, the gentle touches of falling flower petals encompass in a kaleidoscope of colors, vegetation blooming luxuriously across the land. As he wraps his arms tight around your back, your arms rest around his shoulders, letting the sounds of earth envelop the two of you in a blissful imagination.

Weeks pass before you ever see him again. Twirling along the different sections, you’ve already watered the plants for the day, helping a few stragglers here and there until you find a moment of peace. The dream you dreamed has you in a daze you can’t explain, but something about this human enchants you in such a way that you can’t seem to think of anything else but him. As the hours tick by, you lean across the register in hopes that a crowd will bustle through the doors, but nothing of the sort happens. When closing time nears, you begin to check on everything until the sound of the door alerts you that someone has entered the facility.

Turning on a heel, you nearly faint when you see the light pink hair of Jungkook, looking around the store, before his eyes land on you.

“Hello,” you greet with a small wave, “How are you?”

His lips pull into a side grin revealing small dimples you never knew he had. You approach him slowly, folding your arms across your chest as you timidly pause next to the register.

“I’m doing well,” he says, “How are you?”

“I’m doing well, too,” you say, the two of you trying to gather words to speak, but neither of you seem to be able to let it out.

“How’s work-”

“How’s the flow-”

The both of you begin simultaneously, chuckling at the awkward situation.

“You first,” he smiles widely, your heart fluttering in reaction.

“How’s work?” You repeat, Jungkook nodding as he replies.

“Good. I got to see the deer we rehabilitated the other day,” his eyes light up, “Decided to visit the meadow not far from here, and there she was.”

What he said sparks the reminder of what you’ve been waiting to give him for weeks now.

“One sec,” you lift a finger, turning to ruffle through your purse until the wooden figurine is within your hand. Facing Jungkook, a timid smile adorns your lips, his eyes widening in sweet surprise as you lift the wooden figurine of the doe in his line of vision. “I know we hardly know each other. But what you do for animals, and your story, really inspired me. So, I want you to have this,” you hand the carved doe to him, his fingertips brushing yours as he accepts it, his mouth ajar.

“Th-thank you,” he breathes, “It’s perfect. You made this yourself?” You nod, him continuing to express his amazement at your talent. After a few moments, he then lifts his head, his pink hair covering his forehead, silver earrings exposed from the tufts of hair fluffing over the tips of his ears. “I don’t know what time you get off work, but if you’re up for it, I’d love to show you the meadow.” Jungkook’s eyes are hopeful as he holds yours, your heart melting in return. “Maybe we will get to see her again, too.”

“Honestly,” you begin, your gaze never faltering from his kind, brown eyes. “I wouldn’t dream of missing it.”

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