#because I was talking with one of our shared friends about another one of our friendsnot taking them seriously
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Human Resources (NSFW) FT Hyewon Kang
You were working on tightening up Leo's datasheet when Hyewon's teams' message popped up in your feed. You ignored it until you finished cleaning up the datasheet. after that, you read Hyewon's message carefully.
"Hey, can you come to my office? I need to talk to you about something." The message read, and your heart sank. You knew Hyewon, or as you used to call her, Hyem. When you first started working at this company, she was your first friend, the one who made the daunting transition into a new job feel manageable. But then the big boss—the dreaded Miyawaki—made a very expedited decree that there would be no "special associations at work." That all but killed your budding relationship with the HR specialist.
You avoided her with all your might after that. No more talking about shared musical tastes or the latest anime; it was just "Hi" and "Bye." It was rough, but you endured it. Rules were rules, after all. Although increasingly, it felt like it was more rules for them and not for me, as an increasing number of your coworkers became engaged in "special associations."
You arrive in Hyewon's office after narrowly avoiding Leo, and Nako making out in the office of his door. "So much for professionalism," you mutter as you turn a corner. Before you cross the threshold you hear from down the hall.
"Yes fuck my pussy," being yelled/moaned by the Event coordinator Yena and your friend Levi. You grimaced as another one of your friends fell to this almost permeable lust that had taken everyone over, but hey at least they're not as bad as Eunbi and Izzy because that is the last time you work on a Saturday. Hesitantly you open the door and see Hyewon and she looks pissed. her pretty face is contorted in an annoyed grimace that leaves you worried.
"Hey Hyewon," you say hesitantly hoping to ameliorate whatever has her so livid, but you'd be remiss if you didn't mention how her anger was such a turn-on. it was the fourth thing you two bonded over, both of you were chaos gremlins who reveled in indignation.
when she hears your voice she looks up at you with a pleasant smile before saying, "Oh good you're here. Close the door." you do as she says and sit in the chairs across her desk as she sits in her chair.
"I suppose you're wondering why I messaged you to come in," Hyewon said calmly.
you are about to speak but are interrupted when you hear a familiar voice moan,
"Fuck, fuck, fuck, make me cum daddy," you recognize the voice, and you are livid.
"that arrogant and egotistical bitch." you say. You can feel a smirk tugging at the corners of your mouth despite yourself. Her passion, her fire—it’s one of the things you admire, and miss most about her. "Yeah, that sounds pretty typical," you reply, trying to keep your tone soothing yet acknowledging the absurdity. "It’s like they get off on making our lives difficult."
Hyewon’s eyes narrow, her irritation still palpable but now mixed with a hint of amusement. "Exactly! And they don't even follow their own rules. If I have to hear about another office romance getting special treatment while we’re here drowning in work because we follow the rules, I might scream. Especially since Sakura can't keep her hands off what's his name?"
"Momotaro" You answer.
"Thanks, sweetie," Hyewon says in a tone that's both adorable and alluring. you sit in your chair trying to hide your growing erection. Hyewon doesn't seem to notice.
Hyewon takes a deep breath, her fingers tapping lightly on her desk. "I know things have been... different between us since Miyawaki's decree. I hate how it affected our friendship."
You nod, feeling a knot form in your stomach. "Yeah, it’s been tough. I miss our talks."
"Me too," she says, her voice softer now. "But, I noticed something lately. A lot of our coworkers seem to be ignoring that rule, and nothing's happened to them. It seems unfair that we had to stop being friends because of it."
You lean back in your chair, considering her words. "I've noticed that too. It's like the rules only apply to some people, and it doesn't seem right."
Hyewon nods vigorously. "Exactly. And I was thinking... maybe it's time we stopped letting it dictate our friendship. If others can have their 'special associations' without consequence, why should we be any different?"
A spark of hope ignites within you. "You think we can just... go back to how things were?"
"I do," she says firmly. "But more than that, I want us to catch up properly. There's a lot we've missed out on. I was wondering if you'd like to go grab lunch with me today. We can talk about everything—anime, music, life."
"Great," Hyewon says, her smile mirroring yours. "Let's meet at noon and catch up properly."
"Hell yeah, screw her. Hell, let's get lunch right now. Since the whole office is entangled in each other right now," you respond with a grin.
Hyewon smiles, her eyes sparkling with mischief as she grabs her coat and mask. "Sounds like a plan." The two of you head to her car and hop in. She speeds off towards the Korean BBQ place you two were supposed to go to a year ago before everything got complicated.
On the way there, you both fall into a comfortable conversation, the familiarity of old friends making the time fly by.
"So when did Momo and Kura become a thing?" you ask, curiosity piqued.
Hyewon chuckles, shaking her head. "I don't know exactly, but I think they started getting closer about two and a half weeks ago. That's when I noticed a change in their interactions. They started using nicknames and having more one-on-one meetings."
You raise an eyebrow. "Nicknames? Really? That's bold, even for them."
"Yeah, it's like they're not even trying to hide it," Hyewon says with a scoff. "I mean, good for them, I guess, but it’s just so hypocritical. Miyawaki's decree doesn't apply to them."
"Of course not," you agree, rolling your eyes. "It's like there's one set of rules for them and another for the rest of us."
"You know three days ago I caught her giving him a blowjob in her office after she has scheduled a meeting with me to discuss my relationship with you."
"That's such bullshit," you affirm. Hyewon nods.
At the restaurant, the two of you finally have a chance to catch up after nearly a year apart. The ambiance is cozy, with soft lighting and a low hum of conversation filling the air. You settle into a booth by the window, and the familiar scent of grilled food and fresh coffee instantly makes you feel at ease.
"So, what have you been up to?" Hyewon asks, her eyes twinkling with curiosity as she takes a sip of her iced tea.
You smile, thinking back over the past year. "Honestly, just the usual grind. But I did get into a few new shows. Have you seen Elric of Melibone?"
Hyewon's face lights up. "Yes! It's amazing, right? I love the way they adapted the books. Henry Cavill as Elric is just perfect."
"I know, right?" you say, leaning forward. "The storytelling is fantastic. And the fight scenes! The choreography is just insane."
Hyewon nods enthusiastically. "Totally. Oh, and I've been watching Demon Slayer. The animation is out of this world. Have you seen it?"
"I have! The colors, the details, everything is just so beautiful. Plus, the story is gripping. I can't wait for the next season."
The conversation flows effortlessly as you both delve into the different shows and anime you've been enjoying. It's as if no time has passed at all. You talk about the latest season of Stranger Things, the mind-bending twists in Westworld, and the nostalgic joy of rewatching Avatar: The Last Airbender.
"Do you remember how we used to binge-watch Naruto back after work to avoid traffic when we started?" Hyewon reminisces with a laugh. "We'd stay up all night just to see what happened next."
You chuckle, nodding. "Of course! And we had those ridiculous debates about who was the strongest character. Good times."
The waiter comes by to refill your drinks and take your orders, and you continue to chat about your favorite episodes and characters. The restaurant gradually empties as the evening progresses, but you hardly notice, lost in conversation.
By the time you both decide to head back to the office, the sun has dipped below noon, casting long shadows across the pavement. The walk back is filled with more laughter and stories, and it feels like no time has passed since you last hung out.
When the two of you get back to the office, it's empty. The usual bustle and noise are replaced by an almost eerie silence, the kind that only happens when everyone else has left for the day.
"Looks like we have the place to ourselves," you remark, flipping on the lights.
"I wonder where everyone went," Hyewon says sarcastically, knowing the two of you would be here alone until the end of the business day. She rolls her eyes as she glances around the empty office, the desks barren and the usual hum of chatter conspicuously absent.
"Probably off doing stuff," you reply with a smirk, shaking your head. "It's like Valentine's Day came early or something."
Hyewon snorts her expression a mix of amusement and annoyance. "Right? It's not like we have a ton of work to get through or anything." Her sarcasm is as sharp as ever, and you can't help but laugh.
Since you have the office to yourselves, the two of you decide to take advantage of the peace and quiet. You gather your work laptops and head into the conference room, setting up to watch Attack on Titan from the beginning together.
As the first episode starts, you both dive into your tasks, the sound of Eren's declarations of vengeance serves as hype background noise. The rhythm of work and anime is oddly comforting. You blaze through spreadsheets and reports, pausing only when a particularly intense scene demands your full attention.
During a mini-break, Hyewon leans back in her chair, stretching her arms above her head. "You know," she muses, "I bet all those couples are out there spending a fortune on overpriced dinners and romantic getaways, while we're here getting stuff done and watching some of the best anime ever made."
You chuckle, nodding in agreement. "We are doing better. Plus, no distractions from people asking about our weekend plans or trying to set us up with their single friends."
"Ugh, exactly," Hyewon groans, rolling her eyes dramatically. "If I hear one more story about someone's perfect date, I might just scream."
The two of you share a knowing look, bonded by your mutual disdain for the forced romanticism that seems to have overtaken your colleagues. Another episode ends, and you both get back to work, the sound of keystrokes mingling with the anime's soundtrack.
By the end of the shift, you've not only finished half a season but also completed four days' worth of work. Hyewon shuts her laptop with a satisfied sigh. "See? Who needs romantic distractions when we've got Titans to slay and work to conquer?"
You nod, feeling a sense of camaraderie and accomplishment. "Exactly. Same time tomorrow?"
"Absolutely," Hyewon grins, standing up and stretching again. "Let's see if we can finish the season and clear out the rest of the week's tasks."
You smiled as you nodded. While everyone else was off chasing romance, you and Hyewon had created your own little sanctuary of productivity and anime, and it was perfect. Before you get too invested you take a look at your watch.
"Oh shit it's 5 pm Already," you say looking at your watch. you groan. you should have left three hours ago but being here with Hyewon made the time fly by. you begin to pack up for the day but Hyewon has other plans. She gets up from her office chair and pulls you into a competition of who has the strongest tongue. She wins due to the element of surprise as you clumsily accept her kiss. when she breaks the kiss she looks at you with lust.
"You know what we should do?" she says
"Hang out at your place so I don't have to drive home and be stuck in 3-hour traffic?" Hyewon smiles.
"Yes that, but also we should fuck in Sakura's office as payback." Hyewon proposes. you nod and smile wickedly. the two of you walk up to Sakura's office. the golden hour shades Hyewon in an almost godly glow. you smile watching her.
"What?" she says bashfully as she catches your gaze. you laugh and say,
"I can't look at my beautiful girlfriend now?" Hyewon blushes at your words before lifting her sun dress's straps off her shoulders showing her toned and fit body.
"God I should go to the gym," you note. Hyewon shakes her head as she pulls you in for a kiss.
"and get rid of all this beefcake. I don't think so," Hyewon asserted before kissing you. Your hands run up and down her thighs, as I try to figure out what to do with my hands before Hyewon confidently puts them on her breasts. She breaks the kiss and begins to suck around your collarbone and neck.
"I want everyone in this office to know you're mine now, and there's nothing they can do because if they complain all I'll say is. I can file a complaint but I will have to report your indiscretions around Mrs. Miyawaki's policy as well." Hyewon declared before taking you into another kiss. you smiled as she began to grind her clothed pussy toward you. you moan into the kiss.
"Oh darling you're so hard for me. I love it. I have been thinking about this all morning."
You smile and say, "Oh really you dirty girl." Hyewon smiles before turning around and inviting you to pound her pussy. You don't even think twice as you strip out of your office clothes and plunge right into her. her wet cunt readily accepts your intrusion as Hyewon moans.
"Fuck your fat cock is filling me so well." you smile as you begin to thrust into her the indignation both of you felt about this stupid situation has you reeling as you pound into her pussy relentlessly. Hyewon moans enraptured by your cock as she takes it.
"yes, yes, yes. I'm close." Hyewon moans through your fervent and frustrated thrust. the both of you needed this. needed to defile your bitch of a boss's office so when she came you knew to push her onto your boss's desk as she squirted all over the wood and metal. when she was done she smeared all of her cum over the desk and made sure it was fully absorbed before going back to you.
"I want you to finish in her chair so when she comes in tomorrow she's bombarded by the smell of our sex," she says you smile at her dark little heart's desire and follow her as she guides you by the dick. she begins to stroke you while she whispers the most evil words of encouragement,
"Please cum. make her wallow in our sex. make her pay for separating us for a year and a half. Make her pay for all the times we could have movie dates, or gone to stay in nights just playing video games together. make her pay for all the stolen orgasms we could have had together. make her pay for all the time lost." her words are so enticing that your cum races out as your orgasm hits you like a train and your cum plasters her chair. Hyewon smiles and gestures for you to get both of y'all's clothes. while the two of you get dressed Hyewon says.
"I guess now you can officially say "HR has fucked me" like everyone else does" You laugh at Hyewon's terrible joke before going back to her place for the night.
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The hypothetical debates surrounding the whole "Lady and Lord Whistledown" vs "Colin and Penelope Bridgerton" make me wither because
Lady and Lord Whistledown.
I'm telling you, this shit would be so fucking funny. I can picture it in my mind's eye: Bridgerton season 4, we get a quick shot of Colin and Penelope talking shit and giggling like crazy in the background, maybe with some PDA to match because Colin can't keep his hands off her, only to hear a male voice actor of a similar calibre to our angel Julie Andrews join in sometimes while Charlotte picks up the paper and cackles. Obviously, the reveal would happen, but I want to believe that our Queen would be down for Whistledown to continue as long as it doesn't get too personal. It would be kind of unfair and a bit indicative of the period, monarchy and all, but Charlotte being in on it would amp up the comedy points. Plus some ~historical cultural commentary~ would just be that final flavouring of spice.
It would kind of feel like Colin's turning to the dark side because we've already seen quite a few scenes where he seems possessed by Lady Whistdown's attitude and I love the idea of him coming from hating Lady Whistledown's guts to protecting her and joining in because it's fun and it activated his little shit reflex. Plus the subtextual implications of just how much Colin and Penelope actually are best friends and are connected beyond normalcy would just be *chef's kiss*
I would also love it because it feels very partner-in-crime vibes, giving another aspect to their relationship that would be fun to see. Combined with the power Lady Whistledown has on the story, we'd be guaranteed to see our beans quite a lot. Also a "Hello, my Lady," followed by a "Hello, my Lord" after a particularly steamy scene would literally have me shaking crying giggling dancing kicking my feet.
As for Penelope, it honestly depends on how you view her character and her relationship with Lady Whistledown. If the person in question thinks that Lady Whistledown is a vital part of her personality, an aspect of who she is, limiting her by making her quit would just feel really, really sad, man. Lady Whistledown has caused Pen a lot of grief, however, and we see it a lot throughout the story, so I think Colin being there, sharing the secret and partaking would make her feel much more comfortable in her own skin.
Anyway. Love the idea, and would perish if it happened, but probably won't.
Colin and Penelope Bridgerton.
This one's more cute than anything else. Two writers as a couple release solo and joint works sometimes while establishing their reputation as respectable authors and leaving Lady Whistledown behind them. I can see another scene in my mind's eye, Colin and Pen are sitting across from each other on their respective writing desks, writing and then handing each other their work to review and give opinions, paired with a kiss after they start teasing each other about their writing. Considering that the designated Sexy Desk Scene has already been taken, this would have to be in a secluded area or in their bedroom. And then shots of people buying their books and enjoying them would ensue.
With the amount of journals and letters and things Colin's done, he's practically primed for an author's role. Maybe they can be more exposed to Colin's love for travel in this version. Having Penelope with him on his trips while writing their little hearts out would be adorable. Sadly, though, this would mean that they would probably have less screen time.
If you see Lady Whistledown as an outlet for the suffering Penelope was going through throughout the story, she wouldn't need Lady Whistledown anymore and abandon the alias because she's served her purpose as Penelope's coping mechanism, and Colin and Penelope would find their fix through other means. Maybe continuing to gossip but only between the two of them, going back to the beginning of the series and the final link to their relationship.
It's been established over and over again that they both love reading, writing, gossiping, and discussing all things philosophical. And each other for enjoying those qualities. So, I think this dynamic would be particularly interesting because it would be yet another way to connect. They could probably also make each other all hot and bothered by leaving random sexy letters sporadically, which would just be so fitting, tbh. However, that would also work for the Lady and Lord Whistledown dynamic so it's kind of a null point. It would be hot, though.
And, yeah, that's how I see those hypothetical dynamics playing out and how that would affect the characters. But now for the negatives. While I love the Lord Whistledown idea, I do think that Colin is a bit too nice and cute for that, and it would probably be a bit OOC, especially because of his personal experiences with Whistledown, it would be a bit weird if his tune suddenly changed to "yeah, I know gossip can ruin someone's life, but I like it now, so I don't care." But I also just can't fathom Bridgerton without Lady Whistledown, and this idea hinges on literally removing the narrator and source of all the tea, as well as making us lose our angel Julie Andrews. At least the Lady and Lord Whistledown idea fulfills almost all fronts of their relationship dynamic.
Again, as the GIF demonstrates, both are good, and I love both of them for the different ways they would take the characters, but let's be real, a combo would be really fun as well. Like Pen keeps up with Lady Whistledown while Colin writes his own books or smth.
Anyway, enough of my rambling. Bye.
#polin#bridgerton#polin bridgerton#penelope x colin#colin x penelope#colin bridgerton#penelope featherington#penelope bridgerton#lady whistledown#lord whistledown
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I don’t want you like a best friend
Spencer Agnew x Reader
A/N not me doing another imagine based on a Taylor song whhhaaaatttt I love Taylor so so so much. I was listening to music in the shower and dress started playing I was like holy shit, I have to write a tension filled imagine with Spencer and this song??? Also, forewarning, I will be using gender neutral terms as usual but I will be using more feminine things and mentioning things like wearing dresses. one last thing, i just started my summer classes. so, i wont get to edit these as much as before. i apologize for any mistakes!
TRIGGER WARNING// some angst and tension:)
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Our secret moments in a crowded room, they got no idea about me and you.
Parties and little get togethers are a common thing with the Smosh cast.
They always find some reason to rent out an air bnb to throw parties.
Chanse suggested throwing a little party before you all got to leave the office for a two week break.
“Y/N! I’m so glad you could make it!” You hear Chanse screech whenever you walked into the front door with your suitcase. He come running up to you, to give you a quick hug.
“Of course, I wouldn’t miss something like this. The parties you throw are always absolutely iconic.” You respond giving him a tight squeeze back.
“So, who all has made it?” You asked and looked around. A lot of the cast and crew had arrived, including Spencer. The house was absolutely packed but there was something about him having his eyes on you, that made you feel like you were on fire. The last time a party was thrown for the crew, the two of you had ended up in a bathroom, doing things you shouldn’t be doing to then turn around and call yourself only friends. The two of you played it off really well after though because no one knew who you had snuck off with.
There is an indentation in the shape of you. Made your mark on me, a golden tattoo.
“I still want to know who you snuck off with last time we had a party.” You hear Erin say whenever she approaches you and Chanse. “Yeah!” Chanse agrees.
Whenever she mentions that night, you see it catches Spencer’s ears. He perks up in his seat and gets that infamous smirk on his face.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Can you show me to my room?” You mumbled and shook your head.
“I’ll show you but dude, that is such a lie.” Erin says and starts walking towards a hallway, where a bunch of bedrooms were located. “You had hickeys all over you. It was so obvious you tried hiding them too but you are not good at covering marks.” She said laughing loudly.
You just shook your head again and denied it.
“We’ll eventually pull it from you. Everyone’s going to be getting ready in a few minutes, if you want to go ahead and get dressed.” Erin suggests while opening your bedroom door. “You’re sharing with me and Angela, by the way.”
You nodded your head and let her know, you would go ahead and start getting ready.
Erin quickly nodded her head and pulled the door behind her, so you could get ready in private till her and Angela joined you.
You quickly pulled this dress on that Courtney had pointed out to you one day while at the mall with a bunch of the crew. They were recording a spend the day with us at the mall where they done random little challenges. You, Spencer, and Courtney had went into a store, trying to find goofy looking outfits for everyone to wear. The three of you walked around for a while before you just started looking at the clothes for things for you. You hear Courtney shout, “I genuinely just found something for you, Y/N! You would look so hot in this.” You turn around and see Courtney holding up a mid length black dress. There was a high slit in the thigh. It was a spaghetti strapped dress. It was simple but looked comfortable. You actually thought it was really cute. Courtney asked Spencer what he thought and his face flushed red very quickly and all he could do was nod his head yes.
You tried the dress on for fun and Spencer looked like his eyes were about to bulge out of his eyes. You didn’t end up buying the dress that day but you went back and bought it the next day. He wasn’t aware that you had gotten it, no one was.
You stood there for a minute, looking at yourself in the mirror, when you heard a knock come from the door beside you.
“You can come in!” You shout softly, flattening the dress against your body.
The door pushes open gently and you see Courtney and Angela standing there. Spencer was back behind them.
“Holy shit, is that the dress we seen in the mall?” Courtney asks, getting excited.
You just smiled and shook your head yes.
All of the silence and patience, pining and anticipation. My hands are shaking from holding back from you.
All of the silence and patience, pining and desperately waiting.
My hands are shaking from all this…
Say my name and everything just stops, I don’t want you like a best friend.
Spencer looked like he was about to pass out behind the two.
“Wow, you look… wow.” You hear Spencer whisper from the doorway while Courtney and Angela walk to sit on the bed behind you.
You acted like you didn’t hear Spencer, so you turned towards him. His eyes were just filled with desperation. It was like a mutual feeling between the two, you knew he wanted to reach out and to touch you. You knew that he wanted to kiss you, to hold you. You were dying for him to reach forward and to just put his hands on you, to kiss you as well.
“What’d you say, Spence?” You ask, trying to play off the little moment the two of you had.
Courtney and Angela were behind the two of you, looking at each other with complete confusion over what is going on.
“You look really beautiful, Y/N.” He says and clears his throat then gives you a tight lipped smile.
You just smiled back at him and shook your head. “Thank you, I really don’t though.” You say giggling. “I haven’t even done anything yet, besides put a dress on.”
Spencer walked around you to go sit in a chair beside the two beds but then realized that the tag of your dress was sticking out. He quickly walks up behind you and pushes your hair over your shoulder. You tensed up and froze because you didn’t know what was going on.
“Oh, uh, sorry. Your-“ Spencer got quiet then pushed the tag softly under the neckline of the dress. “The tag was sticking out of the dress.” Spencer whispered and gave your shoulder a soft squeeze.
The two of you move apart quickly whenever you hear coughs. Courtney and Angela quickly stood up. “We’re gonna go grab a drink.” Angela says very quickly, pointing at the door with her thumb. “Uh, will be back in a few minutes!” Courtney practically shouts as Angela pulls her out of the room.
The two might as well have ran out of the room and slammed the door shut behind them.
You and Spencer look at each other with confusion, acting like you didn’t understand what was going on.
“When did you end up getting this dress?” Spencer asked sitting down on the chair near you.
Only bought this dress, so you could take it off.
Carve your name into my bedpost cause I don’t want you like a best friend.
Only bought this dress, so you could take it off.
You had pulled another chair up in front of the full body mirror, to start curling your hair and to do your makeup.
“I just decided to go back the next day and buy it.” You respond, slightly shrugging your shoulders.
“Is there a reason you went back and bought it?” Spencer asked, trying to seem chill about the piece of fabric on your body, but he wasn’t playing it so calmly.
“I dunno.” You whispered while placing soft curls throughout your hair with a curling iron. “A certain someone’s reaction to me in it, just made me curious to how they would react to it if I wore it to something where we’ve made certain decisions in the past.”
Spencer didn’t say anything, he just stared at you with a shocked expression.
You started to do the pigtail trick with your hair, that makes it quicker to curl your hair. You parted your hair and put it into two pigtails then quickly curled the two pigtails. It only took two minutes to do then you pulled the two hair ties out of your hair. The soft curls had flooded down your back while you looked for your makeup bag. It hit you that it was still in your bag, on your bed, beside Spencer. You quickly sprayed hairspray throughout your hair and nodded back towards Spencer.
“Spencer?” He just nodded while staring at you. “Could you get in that bag and hand me my makeup bag?”
Spencer quickly stood up and grabbed your bag from the front of the bed. He unzipped it then retrieved your makeup bag, to hand it to you. He walked over and handed the makeup bag to you but the two of you practically grasped hands while he just stared holes into you. You felt like electricity was just shooting throughout your body while he quickly stepped back.
The two of you didn’t realize it but Courtney, Angela, and Erin were just staring at you two in shock from the doorway.
Spencer looked over at the door quickly then stepped back towards his seat to grab his drink that he carried in.
“I should probably go finish getting ready and help getting everything, uh, set up.” He whispers before quickly heading out of the room.
“Do you want to explain what that was?” Erin harshly whispered, looking at you with nothing but excitement in her eyes.
“What was what?” You asked nonchalantly, acting like you didn’t know what was going on.
“Oh my god!” Angela practically screams. “You hooked up with Spencer last time, didn’t you?” She whispered excitedly, jumping up and down in her spot.
You, once again, tried playing the question off but the redness all over your face completely called you out.
“Oh my god! Spencer is the secret guy you hook up with every time! Are you two like a couple or something?” Courtney asks while quickly pulling one of the chairs over beside you while you finished up your makeup.
You shook your head no, “I’m not going to lie to you about that. I honestly wish we were.” You whispered while finishing your eyeliner with a soft laugh.
The three women were practically exploding with the information they had just found out tonight.
“What happened the last time?” Angela asked, pulling a chair alongside Erin.
Inescapable, I’m not even gonna try and if I get burned, at least we were electrified.
I’m spilling wine in the bathtub, you kiss my face and we’re both drunk.
Everyone thinks that they know us but they know nothing about all of this silence and patience, pining and anticipation.
You kept working at your makeup and decided to just explain to the three women what had caused you two to end up in the guest bathroom, away from the New Year’s party.
“I have had the biggest crush on Spencer ever since I’ve joined the crew. I had convinced myself I would never tell him how I feel. The night of that party though, oh my god. It was like there was something in the air.” You paused for a minute to just laugh, remembering how you felt that night. “Every single time we would brush hands or something, it felt like electricity would fly throughout my body. I thought at first, I can’t do this. I ended up getting a little too drunk and so did Spencer. We were sat together in this hallway, just drinking and talking. I finally just told him how I felt. I panicked and jumped up, to run off but he grabbed my hand. He started to tell me how he felt then I, of course, happened to spill a little bit of my drink. He pulled me into the bathroom, to help me clean up. While we were in there, he was just wiping away at the alcohol with a wet rag. It literally felt like my body was on fire. I don’t know what made me do it but I just leaned forward and kissed him.”
The three women around you looked like they were about to explode with the biggest smiles on their face.
“Wait, so you two had sex in the bathroom?” Erin bluntly asked then got whacked on the arm by Courtney.
You just laughed and shook your head no. “Again, I won’t lie to you, we almost did. My dumbass stumbled and knocked over the rest of my drink into the shower. The glass shattered, so Spencer panicked and made me sit on the sink while he cleaned it up. We decided maybe the bathroom, during a party, wouldn’t be the best first time for something like that.”
“How did we not see something happening between you two?” Angela asked with genuine confusion on her face.
“Oh, there isn’t anything going on between the two of us. We’re only really friends, to be honest. I hate that we’re only friends but we never really approach the topic unless it’s in situations like us being plastered.” You admit, shaking your head in shame. “I think it’s because we’re both too scared to admit that we’re something more than friends.”
Erin laughed loudly, “Yeah, I’m sorry but the two of you are not just friends. You were, like, sucking each other’s faces off in the bathroom and being like little leeches.”
You just laughed and stood to face the three around you. “I’m done getting ready, so I’m gonna just head on out there.”
“You just wanna go see your little boyfrienddddddd.” Angela says in a singing tone.
You just laughed once again and shook your head at the woman before exiting the room.
You look around the entire room to see who all is here tonight. Not everyone is staying in the Air BNB, only a few of the crew are.
You spot Kiana, Spencer, and Shayne standing at a table in the kitchen, getting drinks.
You approached them and give Shayne a soft smile. “Hey guys!” You say with a smile on your face.
“Hi, you sweet angel! You look beautiful!” Kiana says with a big smile on her face.
“Oh, why thank you.” You take her compliment while grabbing a red solo cup from the counter and poured some kind of whiskey from the counter.
“There’s glass cups you can use, you know?” You hear Shayne say from beside you.
You look over and see Spence looking you up and down while Shayne is nodding towards the glass cups.
“Oh, that’s okay. I would probably end up accidentally breaking it again.” You say chuckling and sent Spencer a quick glance. He catches onto what you were talking about and heat flooded his face once again.
Spencer goes to take a sip of his drink, trying to act chill, whenever Kiana calls him out. “Spence, if you stare any harder, your eyes might get stuck.”
Spencer choked on his drink and shook his head. You were shockingly the only one to pick up on it but his hands started to tremor.
My hands are shaking from holding back from you.
All of the silence and patience, pining and desperately waiting, my hands are shaking from all of this.
Say my name and everything just stops, I don’t want you like a best friend.
Spencer quickly tries to shake the feeling he has and change the conversation but he can’t stop the feeling of heat flowing through his body due to you. He couldn’t keep his eyes off of you. He was literally shaking from how nervous just your presence alone was making him. He couldn’t get over how beautiful you looked.
“Hey guys, I’m gonna step outside and get some fresh air. It’s getting kind of stuffy in here.” You say quickly to the group, feeling like you were starting to suffocate in the room. You didn’t want to admit it but the look Spencer was giving you was extremely intense. You couldn’t deal with it anymore because you were dying for him to just do something.
You walked away from the group and start to head out the door to walk outside. You didn’t know it but Spencer trailed behind you, wanting to get a moment alone with you.
You stepped outside, slightly agitated. You were getting so tired of having to hide everything. You were so tired of acting like you were just friends with the man whenever you both knew friends don’t sneak off to make out at parties with their other best friends present. You wanted him to hold you. You wanted him to kiss you, to touch you, to just show you that he wants you.
Only bought this dress, so you could take it off, take it off.
Carve your name into my bedpost, I don’t want you like a best friend.
Only bought this dress, so you could take it off.
“You okay?” You hear Spencer ask from behind you as you sat down on the porch steps.
You just laughed. “You know, I bought this dress with the idea that the next time you saw me in it… You might actually make a move further and act like we aren’t just friends. I mean this in the nicest way possible. I don’t want you like a best friend, Spencer. I want to be able to kiss you everyday and call you mine.” You answered him in an aggravated tone.
“I don’t want you like a best friend either, Y/N. Are you that oblivious? The day I fell in love with you, I thought that you knew.” Spencer laughed and said while sitting down beside you.
You just stared at him with confusion on your face, “What do you mean the day you fell in love with me?”
Spencer sat in silence for a minute, just taking the cold air in. “I have been in love with you for so long. The first time I remember realizing that I had fallen so hard for you was whenever I had first bleached and buzzed my hair.”
Flashback when you met me, your buzz cut and my hair bleached.
Even in my worst times, you could see the best in me.
Flashbacks to my mistakes, my rebounds, my earthquakes.
Even in my worst lies, you saw the truth in me.
You chuckled remembering the first time you had seen him with his new haircut. “I remember you came around the corner and I became like a stuttering mess.”
You started to shiver and Spencer noticed it. “Would you want to head inside? We could chill upstairs in the movie room? We can finish talking about this whenever we get in there.”
You shook your head yes, freezing in the dress.
The two of you headed inside and walked up the steps to the movie room. Everyone was in the big living room, drinking and dancing.
You two headed into the movie room and sat down in the plush love seat.
“Wait, so are you saying my reaction is what made you fall in love with me?” You asked once you got inside and processed what Spencer had said. You folded your knees under you and pulled a blanket over your lap.
Spencer smiled and nodded his head at you.
“That was during the worst time of my life, though. I was severely depressed and going on dates left and right because I just wanted someone to love me.” You said silently laughing over how desperate you sounded.
“You’ve always had someone who has loved you in front of you. You’ve just never realized it.” Spencer says and reaches his hand out to rest it on your knee.
The two of you sat in silence for a few minutes before Spencer broke the silence. “I want to make a move or whatever it was you said outside. I want to call you mine. I just don’t want to do that while we’re tipsy. I want to talk about it while we’re sober.” Spencer says giving you a soft smile on his face.
You nodded your head at Spencer, “I agree. It is probably best that we do talk about it while we’re sober.”
The two of you sat and talked for almost three hours straight, while people would pass by and make comments here and there. No one ever stuck there though, they were just letting the two of you soak up each other’s presence.
Before you knew it, you had passed out and Spencer had fallen asleep as well.
I woke up just in time
Now, I wake up by your side, my one and only my lifeline.
I woke up just in time, now I wake up by your side.
My hands shake, I can’t explain this.
You woke up and felt a pressure around your waist. You hear whispering and open your eyes to see Chanse and Erin peeking their heads around a corner.
“Holy shit, look at them.” You hear Chanse say while giggling.
“I’m awake asshole.” You whispered towards the two freaking out and they took off running.
You turn your head to the side and realized, you and Spencer had fallen asleep rambling over random stuff to each other. You know you had admitted your feelings to each other last night but you couldn’t help trembling due to excitement. You finally had the guy by your side that you had fallen so hard for.
The two of you were laid out across the couch. Spencer was laid on his side and had you in a tight hold around your waist. You were laid on your back. You reached your hand up and ran it softly through his hair.
Spencer scrunched his nose and pressed his face softly into your neck. His facial hair, tickling the side of your neck. You giggle trying to move your head away whenever you hear him slightly whisper, “Still don’t want me like a best friend?”
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Well, hello!
Continuing with this theory: https://www.tumblr.com/nunalastor/750428920743116800/well-hello-i-was-talking-to-a-friend-who-says?source=share
My friend and I have seen some things regarding Alastor that make us think that this theory makes sense.
Alastor's Powers: We know in the fandom we like to joke about how a lot of Alastor's powers don't make sense since they seem to be a mix of things Vivzie liked. There are his radio powers that are explained because Alastor was a radio host in life. The fact that he looks like a deer, on the one hand because he was supposedly mistaken for one when he died, and on the other because he is partly inspired by a creature known to be a cannibal, and the fact that Alastor was supposedly a cannibal when he was alive, is supposedly justified by the time in which he lived. According to my friend, there were many changes regarding Alastor's cannibalism. At first, Alastor supposedly always had tendencies towards cannibalism while alive, later that changed to the fact that he resorted to cannibalism to hide his crimes and to not waste meat since in his time it was difficult to get food due to the Great Depression. There was also a time where Alastor was said to have become a cannibal after meeting Rosie in Hell.
With my friend we focused on his magic, with strange symbols, control of shadows, creation of portals, things appearing out of nowhere, manipulation of reality, control of space/time (being able to move structures, like Husk's bar) , that he can become giant and those tentacles make us think about the use of eldritch magic, related to cosmic horror, which is what Cthulhu (Malvada in this universe) is basically. These powers specifically are the strangest in his aesthetic, which doesn't seem to fit with what little we know about Alastor. Therefore, we believe that our theory with Malvada could fit, since his relationship with him would specifically explain these powers.
Furthermore, watching chapter 1 of Helluva Boss, we meet a family of cannibals, and when they go to "sacrifice" Blitzø and Millie, we can see on the trees symbols similar to those that appear when Alastor uses his powers, and there is also a little mention of Roo (Martha says "May the Root of Evil be honored as we continue thy work!" before setting the imps on fire in an attempt to send them back to Hell), so possibly Malvada or Roo were sharing rituals with humans to increase their influence. Perhaps Alastor, by activating part of his powers while alive, investigated and felt subconsciously inclined towards those rituals that were combined with cannibalism, like the family in that episode of Helluba Boss.
Another point to note is Alastor's ability to kill or cause permanent damage without the use of angelic weapons (we thank @allastordeer for this post https://www.tumblr.com/allastoredeer/750704662811983872/that-moment-you-realize-alastor-is-actually-way?source=share where them gives a more detailed explanation of what we will talk about below)
We're not told much about what exactly Alastor did when he eliminated other Overlords, but we know that they were never seen after their screams appeared on the radio, so we can assume that Alastor was somehow able to permanently kill these Overlords. Based on what we know of this universe, that's basically impossible. Unless you make use of angelic weapons, one sinner cannot kill another, any damage is supposed to regenerate over time. In chapter 2 of Hazbin Hotel, Velvette complains that Valentino destroyed her best model and she has no time or patience to wait for her to regenerate. And Vaggie recovers her wings in chapter 7, but she does not recover her eye, this is because Lute removed her eye with an angelic weapon, while she tore off the wings with her own hands so they could regenerate (and yes, we believe in the power of love, why not?). There is also a theory that, in the last fight between Vox and Alastor, Valentino got involved and lost his antenna ("Is someone who owes us more than money"), an antenna that has not regenerated in the 7 years since that fight. And apparently in chapter 5, Alastor permanently killed the sharks that were chasing Mimzy.
Therefore, for some reason, Alastor is capable of causing permanent damage and ultimate death, supposedly without the use of angelic weapons. This could justify the fact that Alastor will face Adam without these weapons. Yes, I've seen many mock that Alastor didn't last long in that fight, but for some reason Alastor thought he could take on Adam without angelic weapons even though he was using them with his tentacles when he raised the shield around the hotel. My friend and I believe that he was testing the effectiveness of those weapons against the angels and showing the others that they were indeed not unprotected, or, if he believed that he could defeat Adam just as he was able to kill other Overlords, he was looking for Adam to go down guard, so he couldn't show that he had that ability until he had it face to face, but unfortunately he didn't have the opportunity to test that theory, either because he really doesn't have that ability, or his contract, possibly with Roo, allowed him prevented him from doing so (Alastor losing is not about power, not even intelligence. Niftty stabbed Adam in the back when he was distracted, and Alastor did land a couple of blows on Adam, the deer was just as arrogant as his opponent and he started playing instead of fighting seriously from the beginning...we blame the script, if Alastor had won Sir Pentius would not have been sacrificed/redeemed and Lucifer would not have appeared)
And speaking of the fight with Adam, that's another point my friend and I talked about, Alastor shouldn't have survived. Another sinner would not have survived, and while Alastor was seriously wounded, he is still able to stand. Using his shadows to move, he walked to his radio station, had his break down and sang his part of Finale, with an open wound, caused by an angelic weapon used by the first man, the most powerful of the exorcists.
Added to that, another point to consider is his blood. While we generally see that Alastor's blood is red, there are also occasions where a "black substance" appears (mainly in the art of the pilot, in the comic "A day in the Afterlife" and I think in a couple of scenes from the series). While sinners have red blood because they were human, those born in hell have black blood (imps, Goetia). Charlie has red blood because she is the daughter of an Angel and a human (Lilith technically never died, she became... a demon? First Sinner? By falling with Lucifer, who still has golden blood like everyone in heaven). Therefore, Alastor is not hell-born, so he has red blood like all sinners, but he still sometimes secretes that "black substance" that could mean that, little by little, he is becoming what Malvada wants.
Also, mention the eyes that follow Alastor. Although these eyes are all over hell, and focus on important events, such as on Angel and Husk in chapter 4, or on the Hotel team and Valentino in chapter 6, when Alastor appears the eyes focus specifically on him. And let's not ignore that anyone from the hotel or the Vees has a direct or indirect relationship with Alastor. If the eyes are Roo's, it makes sense that she is watching Alastor, either on Malvada's orders or because Roo has his soul.
And finally, the contrasts between Alastor and Lucifer, which may be a clue that there is some kind of relationship between them indirectly. If Malvada exists and is the rightful ruler of hell, then, for him, Lucifer is a usurper, a "prince of heaven" who took his place from the "prince of shadows."
With my friend we saw this publication @blue-rose-soul (https://www.tumblr.com/blue-rose-soul/743809883930017792/it-just-dawned-on-me-how-fitting-it-is-the-king?source=share) and we thought it made sense with our theory. While Lucifer and his family have powers related to fire and light, Alastor has shadow powers (and green fire...which is the fire that does harm imps). While Lucifer has 6 wings, Alastor has 4 (occasionally 6) tentacles. That Alastor is a deer puts him biblically opposed to Lucifer (in the publication they talks about deer being the animal symbol of Jesus Christ). Basically, Lucifer and Alastor seem designed to oppose each other (consider that the post is related to their "the Devil's bastard AU" where Alastor is the secret son of Lucifer, a great AU that I highly recommend, but the comparison still works with this theory)
Of course, this is just a theory born from old information, but we love it when canon somehow fits our delusions.
👀
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Rating: T
Written for the @sambuckylibrary Summer Bingo.
Square fill: Long, Separate Vacations.
Words: 1.2K
Content: Language
It was silly, Bucky realizes now, the little spat he and Sam had had. Something childish that they, at the ripe old age of sixteen and seventeen, were too old to be acting like. Summer was too long to be wasted on being upset with one another because of childish, silly things. Still, Bucky is nervous about reaching out to Sam. He is afraid to even look at Sam's social media for fear that the other boy has unfollowed, unfriended, and blocked him.
Sam had said he was glad that they were going on long, separate vacations -- and even though Bucky had tearfully agreed with him, it was breaking his heart day-by-day, piece-by-piece.
His vacation is three days in. Three long days without hearing from his best friend. Bucky cannot enjoy the time spent with his family because he is fretting for Sam. Longing for Sam.
He chances a look at Instagram and sees that Sam has not blocked him. He scrolls through the pictures that his friend has posted. Sam is there hugged up with Sarah, Maria R, and Rhodey. He is wearing a bright smile. The Louisiana sun reflects in his pretty brown eyes, causing flecks of amber to shine through.
He is stunning. Bucky is so gone on him. He wishes they hadn't have had their stupid fight before Bucky and his family left for New York. There is so much he wants to say to Sam. So much more than what his stupid mouth will form; more than his heart will allow.
Just then, he is drawn from his pining by a notification on his phone. He follows the notification, opens his messages, and feels a familiar fluttering in his tummy: Sam has sent him a DM.
Sam has reverted to their old ways of being playful, it seems, and Bucky is happy for it. A little teasing and flirting between friends might be just what he needs.
Fuck it, Bucky muses. What harm can it do to just be real with Sam in this moment?
Bucky feels like his heart is going to leap out of his chest. They often flirt with one another; they often engage in playful banter. But Bucky feels a shift in their friendship right now, even though there are so many miles between them, and there is still a lot left to be said. Without giving it too much thought, Bucky closes the message thread and then calls Sam. He answers on two rings.
"Hello?" says Sam.
Bucky's tummy does a little somersault when he hears his friend's voice.
"Hey, Sammy," he replies. "I'm sorry about our fight."
"Me, too," Sam replies. "It was silly."
"Yeah, it was," Bucky agrees. "Let's not fight again, okay?"
"Sure, if you stop bein' annoying," says Sam, but Bucky can hear the smile in his voice.
He grins back and says, "Well, only if you do."
They both share a little laugh and then the line goes silent for a moment. Bucky speaks once more.
"Sam?"
"Yeah, Buck?"
His heart feels like it's in his throat, but he continues to speak. He is determined to tell Sam how he feels.
"I meant it, y'know," he starts. "What I texted you. I do miss you. I miss you so much."
"I know," Sam replies softly. "I miss you, too."
Bucky smiles widely and then lies down on his bed before he says, "I wish you were here."
"Yeah?" asks Sam, and it sounds as if he is getting comfortable, too.
"Yes."
"What would we do if I was there?" Sam asks, and Bucky has to tell himself to calm down.
"Well, I'd take you wherever you'd wanna go. My treat."
"Sounds nice."
"I'd introduce you to my family," Bucky adds. "My Grandma would love you."
"All grandmas love me," Sam proffers with a grin and Bucky can hear it.
"True, but my Grandma would love you most."
"How do you know that?" asks Sam, and his voice is sincere.
Bucky clears his throat and then says, "She keeps sayin' so. I mean, she says she's gonna love you when she meets you."
"How does she know about me?"
"I talk about you all the time," Bucky admits.
"It's been three days," Sam reminds him. "You couldn't have spoken about me to your grandma that much in three days."
Bucky lets out a small laugh and says, "Maybe I talk about you all the time when I FaceTime with her. Maybe she asks about you, too. Maybe you're all I wanna talk about."
"Oh," says Sam and Bucky can practically feel Sam's blush through the phone. "That's, umm. That's cool, but probably not necessary."
"I can't help it. I like you, okay?" Bucky blurts out, not being able to stop himself. "I like you so much, Sam.
Bucky cannot stop now once he has admitted that to Sam.
"That's why I talk about you all the time to my Grandma," he offers. "That's why it's only been three days away from you but I feel like I'm losin' my mind here without you. That's why I wish I we could spend the summer together instead of apart. It's because I like you. I like you, y'know, more than a friend should like another friend. I like you more than I've ever liked anyone else in my whole life."
His heart is threatening to leap from his chest. His face is warm. His palms are sweating. He finally said it out loud. He finally said it to Sam. In that brief moment, Bucky feels panic rise up inside. He doesn't get the chance to wallow in it because Sam is saying his name softly on the other end of the line.
"Buck?" Sam whispers.
"Yeah?" Bucky replies.
"I umm, I like you, too," says Sam with such earnestness that Bucky thinks he might cry.
"For real?"
"Yeah," Sam replies. "For really real."
Bucky lets out a nervous little laugh and says, "Cool. That's uh that's so cool."
"Yeah," Sam replies after a little nervous chuckle of his own. "So, what does this - what do we do now?"
"Count the days until we see each other again and make out about it?" asks Bucky with all of the hope and bravery his seventeen year old heart can muster.
"Damn, okay," Sam replies with a giggle, sounding somewhat flustered. "I'm down for that."
"Really?"
"Yes, really."
Bucky feels like he just might float away. He feels like his chest is full and there are a thousand little butterflies inside of his tummy. He feels like everything is right in the world. He wants to kick about and giggle and tell Sam how pretty he is and how badly he wants to kiss him. He wants to run out into the living room of his Grandma's house and tell her that his Sammy likes him back. Instead, a realization comes to him.
"Crap!" says Bucky as he covers his face with his hand. "This really is gonna be a long ass separate vacation."
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hi steppy! i’m one of the admins of the late povkellypiquet so here are the messages we got. sadly we don’t have access to the screenshots anymore because it was all through tiktok but this is what our source said.
"Jerome D'Ambrosio and Natalie got married in 2013 but prior to that she would travel a lot with Jerome on the f1 circuit. She would always say most of the wags were incredibly kind. She also said you had to be tolerant and have an amicable personality to be able to be with an f1 driver because although they are glorified they are have really intense personalities, they are often controlling and absolutely have to get their way. (not all of them but most are). At that time Kelly was absolutely a nobody, she was just known for her father and her need for attention so she ended up doing some blogging for formula E and that's where her true colors came out so everyone knew she was dying to be a wag and no one liked her, she would purposely try to befriend drivers and made her rounds... one of them being Jerome, Natalie's husband at the time. They weren't even married a year and she kept getting sent pictures that were taken on the track from the media of her with him talking super close and always together. She then found out they would go on shopping trips and he would stay extra days in whatever city to spend time with her. Besides her being promiscuous she's got a very arrogant unlikable personality. So that happened - her marriage ended."
"So Jerome and her stopped dating. To this day he denies it but she probably doesn't because she just wanted soooo badly to have the status of a wife or a drivers girlfriend. So at that time this girl who worked in formula E started dating her brother Nelson Piquer Jr. they were super in love- Kelly absolutely hated the girl because she actually had a job and is a super beautiful and nice person so Kelly made every effort to destroy their relationship which she did. Kelly would relentlessly bully Nelson's girlfriend and make up rumors. Kelly got her way and the girl and Nelson eventually broke up. Kelly is widely known for being home wrecker, a morbid narcissist and a spoiled, entitled brat. She had a super low key Brazilian surfer bf while she slept around with drivers trying to be relevant."
i asked my insider if they knew anything about the magical night between max and kelly, and this is what they said:
"This is how it went: max's gf was visiting him in Monaco for the weekend and, max, the Gt, Nelson's gf and Nelson all went out clubbing the second night and Kelly decided to join them. Then Kelly left the club with Max.... so Max abandoned his then girlfriend at the club and Kelly went back to his place to sleep with him. His gf ended up spending the night with Nelson and V and was devastated. Kelly absolutely knew she was in the club too and didn't care. So in summary: Kelly stole Max from his then girlfriend."
after that i asked them if this was dilara or another of max's exes, and this was their response:
"It was not Dilara it was a blonde from Amsterdam. Her name is Roos Van Der Aa. Million times more beautiful and nice than Kelly... Not sure what max was thinking"
in the name of the other admins we want to thank each and every one of you who supported the account. we know that some posts were harsh sometimes but most of them were showing kelly for how she really is. she got mad about that and had her friends message us and threaten us… i think she threatened us too. before we got taken down we got an anonymous tip saying she had reached out to jerome about this but he said he wasn’t going to defend her. we don’t know if this is true but it might be because she was really desperate to take the account down.
if we ever get more tea we will share it with you. if you have any questions for us we can answer them!
— ❤️🩹
I just hope you guys don’t get doxxed 😭
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well mark that down as situation 2938489 that I don't know how to handle
#i would love advice on this if y'all have any thoughts to share because i know what my parents think and im having trouble sorting it out#i love these three friends of mine but it is really draining to be around them now because all they will talk about is church drama#(re: our old church) and rehashing it all and being Outraged about the horrors etc etc#either that or being downright condescending about protestants/non denominations and acting like it's funny to talk like that all the time#i end up being more angry or resentful or exasperated at the end of our conversations than glad and at peace like i did before#(before all THIS ish happened and the three of them were like okay this is all we're going to talk about now)#i've tried to say in gentle ways (i am simply not capable of this kind of blunt confrontation) that maybe we should not be talking#so uncharitably towards other people especially behind their backs. like. yes bad things happened. we have to acknowledge that.#but continually making jokes and jibes at a priest's expense really rubs me the wrong way especially since i KNOW that he loves us#and in many ways was trying his best in the circumstances. and are we not supposed to be loving our neighbour#and is this not downright slander to keep going on this way esp since it goes on for HOURS at a time#anyway i don't know what to DO because if i keep chatting with them/meeting up with them conversation will be 90% this thing and i Hate It#but on the other hand i feel responsibility towards them because my godson's one of them and another is a friend who is a fairly recent#convert and if i leave them to stew in their own echo chamber i doubt it'll do them good#am i supposed to keep some distance? am i supposed to keep arguing whenever one of them says something unkind or inflammatory?#am i supposed to keep speaking up so that they hear a different perspective? am i supposed to run in the other direction for my own peace o#mind? anyway i am still thinking this over and it stresses me OUT#it used to be fun and life giving to be around these people and now it is so exhausting and seriously alarming in many ways
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Also I have to confess when Eichi does the the "I've heard usually people do this and this" or anything in that vein as a statement it's so real to me
#speaking as someone who learned most of their way of existing from tv and movies ans audio books and audio dramas.#I wasn't confined to a hospital bed I was just very enamored with movies and TV shows and audio dramas#and never really interested in interacting with other kids#and I'm an only child#and my social life began around this winter when people started celebrating their birthdays and inviting me and hanging out and inviting me#before that I never did anything with my friend acquaintances#We're too close to be acquaintances but i don't like labeling people as friends it puts an obligation on the relationship#there's one of them i genuinely consider a friend but we mostly talk about our interests and that's where it stops#she's the only one I talk with outside of the shared WhatsApp chat and ever since her number one friend found another number one friend#We've started talking more because what else am I supposed to do#it's nice. I'm a tea drinker now.#somewhat#in movies they always have bigger friend groups but i cant manage that many relationships at once#so it's better if I reserve the term friend for people who I actually talk to outside of certain contexts#but yeah it's so interesting when life imitates art#teenagers are supposed to get drunk right recently I accidentally got drunk enough to deliver the finishing blow to an already weak glass#never doing that again imagine the things I could've revealed about myself#but it's a fascinating experience because now I can look at that in fiction and understand!!#and I've been told I'm a bit cartoonish in the way I carry myself#which is a little funny to me because I as a person am pretty apathetic to a Lot of things#few things that make me happy a lot of things that annoy me and the rest is jusg kind of in the soup#but it's fine rhats just what being normal is like i guess#i should sleep it's lateeeeee and I need to get up early tomorrow.#regrettably#enjoy the tags while you still can because those things will be going down with this post in a few hours when I'm awake again and#less uncomfortable with sharing any kind of personal information
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My ex friend finally kicked me off his steam library sharing
Only took him half a year
#im not particularly torn up about it#tho its funny to me that he hadnt noticed up until now#im like 95% sure he removed me manually cause i saw him online today and i played one game from his library#which i havent been doing much cuz all the good games were on his sister's account which steam always liked kicking me off randomly#anyway im the winner here still cuz i have our shared terraria world#this all sounds incredibly petty but the main reason i havent disabled the library sharing was because i thought it was funny#its such a random situation. ive legit not heard anything from the guy since march. but you bet your ass i played games from his library#the only reason i know hes still alive even is that it took him a few months more to ghost another mutual friend and she mentioned him#i got the terraria world in the divorce. idc that he built the castle. i fished there. blood sweat and tears went into that goddamn phone#pork talks
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^^me realizing my friend may actually not be my friend or understand me as a person or care about me at all outside of a shallow perception of me based on my recent behavior despite the fact they have known me for 6 years
#this is a vent#sucks to realize that someone never really cared about you#or at least never bothered to show it#and I mean we’ve always been very “friends who are super different”#but I didn’t think about how that might play into them not actually being the type of friend I need?#this feels very middle school navigating friendships help book#but I seriously feel like shit for not realizing this#that they never stopped to actually look at me or how I act#in the way I try to see how they are at certain times#i could name so many things they do differently from how they normally are#when they’re tired their face twitches#every time they swipe something o their phone they make a full circle with their thumb before doing it again#they act like they’re not touchy unless they’re with friends#and yet I’m realizing that they probably don’t know any of these things /I/ do#that I know for a fact my other#better friends do#and Honestly I only stopped to think about this recently#because I was talking with one of our shared friends about another one of our friendsnot taking them seriously#so I offered to help them talk it through#only to be told by this person that I shouldn’t or can’t#because “you can’t mediate”#they didn’t have a reason why#they just said I couldn’t#and maybe this is just me being insecure and wanting to Prove I Am Capable#And Useful To The People In My Life#but it just stuck with me????#that they thought I was incapable of that#and I KNOW why they said that#it’s because of how I present myself#because I project a lot of confidence and carelessness (cough rise leo cough im not bringing him into this tho)
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my friends motorsport server being called the dan gc and then. mostly being made up of people who are lukewarmly curious about his being dropped by mclaren is incredibly funny to me
#to be fair it started as that#then when mr 0 dropped the ableist/racist slurs and a bunch of people got kicked for continuing to be fans of him it dtarted to change cos#a lot of people were in there specifically to ship him with dan (i literally ended up there cos i met nat and raf and nat introduced me to#kerry and invited me to the server so i could talk abt new special interest)#and then we all started having our interest in the sport and dan wane during last years mess of a season#and all started supporting lewis cos he was the only one who repeatedly was like ''i will do something when bad things happen. sport....#have flaws. we can fix!'' and the general apathy in regards to. everything happening in the world was insanely frustrating#and we all started watching different sports and tv shows and sharing interests outside then#and now really its just a server of like 20 friends who met through that sport but share a multitude of interests and hobbies#who talk about that and our personal live#s and interests more than anything else#which is fascinating to me because ive been in quite a few fan based servers that have died off within a year#because ultimately once people start losing the shared interest they stop talking if they didnt make friends#with other members of the server#im very lucky that more often than not i have continued to make friends that outlasted these interests who end up joining other servers im#in/continue to follow and talk to me#holy shit the servers been around 2 years though. like thats insanely cool.#but yes another name might be apt.#only other time our server has been talked about was the twitter callout post that claimed we were a server#made and dedicated to hating on mr 0 who spent all our time trying to cancel him and had 100+ members#a tweet i read and then closed before opening up chat to find my friends having had a 300+ message history#talking about nordic infrastructure and the logistics of having heated roads that had gone on a good hour and a half#truly filled with the most pure evil conniving human beings on the planet#anyway now youve read this far IMAGINE LOSING YOUR SEAT BECAUSE A TWITCH STREAMER OUTDROVE YOU#mind you that twitch streamer is that teams money horse and they'll beat it forever before giving it up
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You posted about adhd and I was hoping to follow up to clarify something. I’ve explained to my partner a million times about how the borderline-hoarding mess of his space is very mentally draining to me, and he understands but we’ve both essentially accepted he won’t clean his mess because he can’t because of his adhd. You’re saying he’s actually being a shit head?
This isn't necessarily an issue of him being a shithead, but it also isn't a sustainable situation. It's not good for you and there's a level of clutter that's probably not good for him either.
Large bastard is a lot more clutter-y than I am. The solution we've come to is trying to keep our messes at least isolated from one another; he can have his messes and I can have mine, but he can have those messes in his spaces, not all over the place. Sometimes those messes migrate, and that's when it's important for him to make the effort to rein them in rather than trying and failing to make a daily effort to keep our entire shared space tidy.
I think when you say "we've both essentially accepted he won't clean his mess" what I'm hearing is resignation; you're not happy about this but you don't know what to do so you've thrown up your hands and he feels helpless and unsure of what to do to improve the situation. This is the kind of "it's fine" that isn't really fine.
I think it would be worthwhile for you to each separately think about the mess and talk about it together. Are there areas that YOU *need* to have not-messy? Both for utility and your mental health? Are there areas where you can tolerate more mess than otherwise? Are there areas that are going to be harder for him to keep the mess out of than others? Are there things he doesn't *know* about cleaning up the mess?
I'm obviously a big "communication communication communication" person so I'm going to recommend a lot of talking about stuff, which is probably going to mean a lot of thinking about and interrogating stuff. I'm going to say "talk to him about why the mess bothers you" which means you also have to really articulate to yourself why the mess bothers you (for instance I'm not actually *bothered* by a messy kitchen, but I know it's going to reflect badly on us - and me specifically b/c of presumed gender roles - if someone pops by and the kitchen is a disaster, AND a messy kitchen is going to be harder to use). Genuinely, sometimes knowing *why* something is a problem might make it easier for someone with ADHD to do something. And it's not that he doesn't care that it upsets you, it's just that "Oh if I don't wash my breakfast dishes Anon won't have clear counterspace to make lunch" might be stickier in his brain (and less hard to look at emotionally) than "this thing I forget to do upsets my partner so I should do it."
For the record, I think that people with ADHD should read up on Demand Avoidance and see if it might explain some of the issues that they have in their day-to-day life; I've seen some really unfortunate situations with friends where trying to do things that their partner needed became the subject of demand avoidance. *I* have experienced negative outcomes of demand avoidance. The solution to that, however, isn't to stop making attempts to do the thing OR to simply try harder to do as they're asked/told (which reinforces the demand), it's to work on setting up a situation where the partners' needs are not interpreted as a demand. This is fuck-off difficult and requires a lot of patience and care and many attempts to succeed and will be different for each person and relationship.
(Also for the record demand avoidance isn't *super* strongly linked to ADHD and it's not a definitive symptom; like Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, it is something that occurs in some number of people with ADHD and can be a useful lens through which to examine various behaviors; you don't need to have DA or RSD to have ADHD, and having DA or RSD also doesn't invalidate your diagnosis; they're symptoms. For me, DA often feels like "if I don't look at it, it can't get me" - If I ignore all the messages I've got they aren't real and don't have real consequences so I'll just ignore my texts. If I don't look at the vendor email about the order, the problem with the order isn't real and it won't get added to my task list. If I don't look at the requests in my inbox I can't let people down when I don't do them. It's a self-protective coping mechanism but it's *maladaptive* and I can't just ignore the vendor email or all my texts. I need to work on a way of doing the stuff that I'm avoiding in a way that makes it less stressful and doesn't hurt the people relying on me. That takes a lot of effort, personal insight, trial and error, and )
But before I dive into specifics I want to be really really clear about one thing: sometimes people are simply incompatible. Sometimes one person has such a low tolerance for "mess" and the other person has such a high threshold for "mess" that it can't be reconciled. It sucks that this can end up being a thing that people break up over, but it is MUCH better to acknowledge incompatibility as early as possible instead of spending years and years building resentment.
There used to be a great forum called MiL's Anonymous that I spent a lot of time on. It had a lot of people in a lot of difficult situations struggling to get by and hold their relationships together. The question that was used as a litmus test to approach each situation was simple: If you knew today that everything about living with this person would be the same in five years, would you stay?
Because you can't control your partner. You can't control the future. You can only control yourself and your proximity to situations that are harmful to you. If you knew, 100%, that things wouldn't get better in five years, would you be okay with staying in this relationship? If the answer is "no," then that's that. Don't worry about questions of whether or not your boyfriend is a shithead, start the process of ending the relationship because there's a good chance the situation is going to be exactly the same in five years.
If the answer is "yes," and you'd stay in the relationship regardless of whether or not things changed, then it's time to take actions to improve your life within the context of the relationship.
(No judgement on that yes or no, btw. If you would hate living like this for another five years, and you would feel like you'd wasted your time and hadn't done the things you wanted to with your life, get out. Bail. Go. It will be better for you and better for your partner if you split instead of spending half a decade building resentments and and problems that you'll have to spend another half a decade healing from.)
Also, a note: you describe your boyfriend's mess as borderline hoarding - is the issue *mess* or is the issue *clutter*? I have friends who are very tidy, but whose homes are very cluttered. They like things, they have many things, they keep many things around, but their houses are always clean and well-dusted and orderly, just with a tremendous amount of *stuff.* I am addressing all of this as though the issue is mess, not clutter. If your boyfriend's situation is clutter (the space is busy and packed with things but it is functional and clean) and your issue isn't with *mess* (things out of place, things not having a place, things that need to be cleaned up gathering in stacks, falling behind on regular chores like laundry and dishes and taking out the trash) then you definitely need to assess whether or not you are compatible.
For instance here's a room that is messy but not cluttered compared to a room that is cluttered but not messy:
That first room is a *mess* but it would be very easy to clean up in under an hour. The second room is fairly tidy, but would take significant effort to pare down and declutter. BOTH of these can be difficult to live with but the second one is not dangerous or threatening to anyone's health. (The second one is QUITE cluttered and if every room in a house looks like this it can be overwhelming to live with; this is actually harder to deal with in a relationship than the first one in a lot of ways. I don't have a lot of advice for what to do if your partner is a high degree of tidy-but-cluttered because I don't actually think it's a problem or wrong to have thousands of books or bins full of lego or a million kitchen appliances as long as you have the space and can keep it safe and well-maintained; this is a really significant compatibility issue)
Okay, all that out of the way, here's the hard work.
Talk about this shit
Talk to your partner and define "mess." Make sure you are on the same page about what you mean when you're talking about what a messy room looks like versus what a tidy room looks like. Gather reference pictures. DRAW reference pictures.
Explain not just that the mess upsets you, but *why* and *how* it upsets you. In this context don't think of it as your boyfriend's mess, think of it as an unpleasant roommate. Discuss this using "I-statements". "When I have to pick up laundry all over the apartment, I feel like a parent more than a partner." "When there are piles of miniatures all over the table, I feel like I don't have anywhere to do things I'm interested in." "When there are dishes in the sink, I feel frustrated because I have to clean before I can feed myself."
Discuss, frankly and openly, whether he knows how to clean. I'm not trying to make excuses for him here but a lot of people with ADHD have a lot of stress and avoidance around cleaning because they spent a lot of time getting yelled at for not knowing how to clean properly.
Discuss your needs, be firm about what you require but willing to compromise. You *need* some spaces to be clean, and some spaces may be harder for him to keep clean than others. It may be MUCH harder for him to keep a bedroom tidy than it is to keep a kitchen tidy; if you need a clean and empty bedroom with everything put away and he simply cannot do that, that is a compatibility issue. But perhaps you need *your* side of the bedroom to be very orderly and can tolerate a moderate level of mess and clutter on his side. Maybe you're really really bothered by a messy kitchen, but it doesn't bug you if the dining table is covered with projects and papers. Figure out something more workable than "his mess goes everywhere and i live with it because he's incapable of cleaning" because he probably is not incapable of cleaning and you deserve to have places in your home that are comfortable for you.
Reduce friction for cleaning
Sometimes the problem isn't cleaning, the problem is the many many steps before cleaning, or not knowing where something should go when you are done cleaning. One of the absolute best things I've done for myself for cleaning my space is getting a broom holder and mounting the broom to the wall. Sweeping is now essentially thoughtless. I don't have to find the broom or pull it out from a pile of fans or go scrounging around for a dustpan it's right there on the wall, frictionless. So here are some ways to reduce the barriers to cleaning:
Make sure you and your partner both know how to use your cleaning supplies and know where those supplies are. When I switched dishwasher soap I had to re-show Large Bastard where I was storing it and how it was used, because to him what happened was the dishwasher tabs just vanished one day and he didn't know what I was putting in the machine or the process I used. He sometimes puts tools away in places that I can't see (he's more than a foot taller than me) so sometimes I can't get started on a maintenance project until he shows me where he put the battery pack for the drill.
Consider making a how-to chart to or having him make a how-to chart to keep someplace accessible so he can reference it while cleaning. Goblin.Tools Magic ToDo is great for this. Basically a lot of the time people with ADHD have trouble knowing what to do from step to step even if they've done something before, so having a step by step guide can make it easier (I have notebooks full of step-by-step guides for everything from paying for my tuition to removing licenses for my customers to weeding my yard)
Remove obstacles; don't keep cleaning chemicals in the garage in a box that's behind a stack of parts, keep them in the room you'll be cleaning. Don't keep the cleaning supplies that you use to clean the bathroom in the kitchen. Sometimes this means buying two bottles of bleach solution and two scrubbers and two sets of cleaning gloves but having fewer steps (fetch the windex, fetch the paper towels, fetch the gloves) is often the key to getting things done (open under-sink cabinet and grab windex, gloves, and paper towels that are there instead of in the kitchen).
This sort of overlaps with the next category, which is:
Create Dump Zones
One thing that I've found that seems very different between people with ADHD cleaning and neurotypical people cleaning is that neurotypical people are good at getting to a point where the cleaning is "done." They have checked off their tasks and they have finished and it is over. There are *SOME* chores that are like this (taking out the trash is a binary state, the trash has been taken out or it has not) and some chores are perpetual (horrid cursed dishes) but I think with people with ADHD, some chores that are binary for neurotypicals are actually perpetual chores. For instance "clean off the counter" is not a one and done for me. "Clean off the counter" may involve a three day reorganization project. "Clean off the counter" does not mean "wipe down the tile and put dishes away" it means assessing whether or not I need to make vegetable stock and bleaching three tea containers and reconsidering whether or not the sharps container should live somewhere else and going through the mail and figuring out what needs to be responded to and taking out the recycling and on and on and on.
We have had company at the house for the last two weeks, so I asked large bastard to clean off the dining room table, which is largely a project zone for him. Cleaning off the dining room table meant putting away his meds (and since he's a transplant patient that involves a 30 gallon rubbermade tote), throwing away some trash, and totally reorganizing his workshop. It also incidentally involved picking up a table from facebook marketplace and moving my plants, which has now involved moving my former plant rack outside (moving buckets, finding and organizing planters and gardening tools) and taking the former table to the thrift store (not done yet) and cleaning the rug that was under the former table. So "either the table is clean, or it isn't" isn't really true for us.
HOWEVER "hang on we can't eat until the table is clear so let's drive to Pico Rivera to get that console table right now" isn't a workable plan, so you create dumpzones as areas of holding between the start and the finish of the chore.
A dump zone can be a laundry basket. It can be a craft bin. It can be a back room or under your bed. It is a place to put things that you are going to deal with later because if you deal with them now it is going to derail the thing you are actually trying to do, which is set the table for dinner.
Dump zones are vital to cleaning with ADHD and I recommend them for day-to-day cleaning as well. The day-to-day dump zones might be more for you than for your boyfriend. For instance, Large Bastard works with bullets and he sheds bullets all over the house. I used to get stressed when I found bullets when I was cleaning because are these work bullets? Are these recreational bullets? Are they in testing? Do they need to be pulled? Do they go in the workshop or the office or the garage or does he need these today so they have to stay on the counter? And the answer now is "that's not my problem naughty bullets go in the jar." Which is perfectly sensible because he gets to say "mystery yarn goes in the bin" and "art supplies go in the bucket."
I feel helpless when cleaning a lot of the time. I'm frustrated and lost and I don't know where stuff goes and everything I pick up spins off into three projects in my head and every step feels like a wall to scale. Dump zones help me with that when there's pressure or a reason for cleaning beyond day to day home maintenance. People are coming over? The bedroom is a dump zone, I'll deal with that later. I'm just cleaning up because I need to? Okay I can find a permanent home for this new dish soap.
AS A VERY IMPORTANT COROLLARY TO THIS:
Active projects do not go in dump zones while you or your partner are cleaning. This may mean designating a project sanctuary area like a corner of the table or one particular chair in your main room where a project can be placed so as not to be disturbed. (if my current crochet project ends up in the yarn bin, that may mean that I don't pick the project up for another three months, it lives on the windowsill behind the couch because that's where it'll get worked on)
Do not put things away for your partner, put them in the dump zone for your partner. Your partner has to be the one to put their own stuff away in a way that works for them. I tend to find that this naturally puts a limit on the time stuff sits in the dump zone, because eventually you'll go "hey where's my thing?" and will put stuff away. If that doesn't happen, it's still generally better to have stuff in a dump zone than all over the home.
Do not decide you know what things go together from your partner's stuff and try to "put like things together." The neurotypical urge to put like things together is the mindkiller(j/k). You do not know which things are "similar" in your partner's organization schema and attempting to organize things on your own is going to end up with all of the things "organized" being functionally lost forever from your partner's perspective. Large Bastard's mom would do this and it was infuriating, she'd say "oh I put all the electronics stuff in one box" and she would mean soldering irons, transistors, ham radios, HDMI cables, and cellphone chargers. We are *still* going through boxes of stuff that she "tidied up" when he was hospitalized in 2020 and 2021.
To prevent the need for quite so many dump zones over time, you can work on setting up landing zones and "homes" for projects and tools.
Landing Zones
Landing zones are places where things go when you come inside from doing various things. Sometimes your landing zone only needs to be a tray for your wallet and keys, sometimes your landing zone needs to be a place to take off muddy boots and put a trowel and gloves down before you shower.
To make an effective landing zone, consider what behaviors you're trying to minimize and whether the people using it are ACTUALLY going to use it. For instance I was tired of the corner of my hearth getting cluttered with random junk so I hung up some hooks and put a shelf and a basket there and it became a really effective landing zone for my bag and keys and the mail, but it was VERY ineffective for Large Bastard because it's by a door that isn't the primary door he uses to enter the house. As a result I always know where my keys and bag are but he has trouble finding his keys and wallet. He tends to enter the house through our bedroom and has an overloaded valet next to the door and that's usually where his wallet ends up. Mounting a shelf to the wall above the valet and putting a basket and a hook on it will be a better place for his stuff to land. It's not that he's not using the first zone because he doesn't know that it's there, or because he doesn't care about lost time when I'm searching for my car keys after he borrows them, he's not using it because it's not by the door he uses. That's all.
I have a landing space for when I come in for gardening that's different than the one when I come in from grocery shopping. I have a landing space for when I walk into the dining room instead of the kitchen when I get home.
Landing spaces prevent stuff from piling up all over the place because they are a limited functional space that should be used frequently. Mail ONLY goes in the landing zone. If you have mystery mail or if you're not sure it's safe to toss, you put it in the landing zone. You can't let the mail get piled up too high or you won't have a space for your keys. You can't let the change in your wallet tray get too deep or your wallet is going to slide off, etc., but you also don't just put change on the coffee table or your nightstand because the landing zone is right there.
Homes for items are just what they sound like. They're the place the item goes. It lives there. My meds live on my nightstand. You would not believe how poorly I did with taking my meds on my vacation because they weren't on my nightstand. A while back large bastard lost one of his sets of sorted meds and we tore the house up looking for them because he couldn't find them in his nightstand, which is where they live. *I* found them in his nightstand because I emptied out the entire top drawer (he had only looked on the top layer) and found them underneath a radio and a hammock. Even though they were *hidden* they were in their home, so they were findable. I recently needed ink for an art class. Art supplies live in a dresser by my desk. Ink lives in the art bin or the top left drawer. The ink was not in either of these places (it was on a cabinet in the dining room behind a teacup) so it took me weeks to find it.
Sometimes the reason that ADHD spaces are so messy is because objects have been assigned homes in places that are visible and if they get moved they get lost. This is a genuinely difficult problem that requires a lot of effort to solve and can involve a lot of trial and error for creating a tidy living space. For some people, open shelving and visible storage might be a good solution. For some people, assigning a VERY clear home and inculcating that location by habit is the only way to clean up a space. For some people one very cluttered corner to at least isolate the chaos does the trick (for me and large bastard open shelving doesn't work because anything in one place for too long becomes invisible; that means that I rely on assigning things homes and large bastard relies on having contained chaos and a general idea of where to search but what that DOES NOT mean is that he is clean or tidy. His spaces look like an explosion. But he can mostly find his stuff and do what he needs to do and as long as that's limited to specific places in shared spaces I can live with it; the dining room table can be a disaster, the kitchen cannot).
People organize things differently. It often takes a while for neurotypical adults to settle into an organizational style that works for them and ADHD adults may need to settle into a new system every few months for it to continue working. The cleanup and declutter is most likely going to be a permanent project that is always going to demand some level of attention from everyone in a shared space, but "my ADHD means I can't do it" is not really going to fly. Maybe his ADHD means that he can't keep his space tidy, but it doesn't mean you can't move stuff from shared spaces into dump zones or that he can't do stuff around the house.
If he's insisting that his ADHD means that he can't clean it is possible that he's not being a shithead, he just feels helpless and doesn't know where to start and has adopted the belief that he's a useless piece of shit who can't even keep a tidy space like a grownup because he's internalized a lot of shitty attitudes (hello, my internal monologue about keeping a clean house). But it's also possible that he's just being a shithead.
It's something that's worthwhile to investigate with him. If he's unwilling to make an attempt, then he's being a shithead.
It is also not your responsibility to rehabilitate another person. If he wants to clean and it's something he feels bad about and needs some help and support with the way that someone might need help or support for learning to use a mobility aid, that is fine but you don't have to be the one who gives him that support if it's detrimental to your health, and you don't have to be the one to teach him that stuff if it's not something you're capable of. And if he is NOT interested in working on making your shared living space more accessible for you, that is not your suitcase to unpack and you just have to ask yourself the question from the start: would I stay with this person if I knew the situation was never going to change?
IDK, I'm sure a lot of this reads like "anon you must take on the emotional labor of training your partner to be an adult" but it's really meant to be more of a way of assessing yourself and your relationship. If you created landing zones do you think he'd use them? Would he get angry if you assigned a laundry basket as a dump zone for his stuff while you tidy the living room? Is living with him long-term going to be comfortable for you if nothing changes? Do you have enough of a shared definition of "mess" that you're at least in the ballpark for what counts as a clean house?
anyway good luck, and a reminder to folks that I'm compiling a bunch of adhd resources and other information on my personal website, ms-demeanor.com. It's coming along slowly but it will eventually include stuff like ADHD cleaning tips and how to tackle a hoard, so maybe keep your eye on that space.
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"I just hope that one day, we both can laugh about it, when it's not in our face, won't have to dance around it. Don't drive yourself insane. It won't always be this way" - Skin. Sabrina Carpenter (quote inspo)
Bakugo knew nothing about love. Well, that's what you thought when you first met him.
At the tender age of six years old, he had this habit of pulling you by your arm to drag you around when he wanted to show you something, his little fingers leaving marks in your skin.
When you were ten years old, he started putting his feet in your way so you would stumble and sometimes kiss the floor while he parted himself from laughter.
In the beginning of teenagers' age, thirteen, he used to put his arm on top of your head to make fun of you because he was actually getting tall while you were stuck in your pre-adolescence height.
At sixteen, he ghosted you.
Yep, that's what you read. He ghosted you because he felt this funny feeling growing in his tummy every time he saw you.
Katsuki never knew about love. You thought crying in your dorm because your best friend wasn't acting like your best friend anymore.
You actually believed it.
It all began when you two got into UA. He was excited, having someone to actually compete with? You learned a lot from him (almost against your own will), but after a few years, he considered you a fair opponent.
The feeling inside his guts happened instantly. One day, both of you were returning home from classes, in the train he was behind you, protecting you from all the people that were squeezing into their spots. A baby caught your attention immediately. She was smiling at you, and you couldn't help but make her faces, smile, and bat your eyes at that little baby, gaining a few giggles in return.
Katsuki found that amusing.
He started to see you with other eyes. Helpless eyes. That feeling that woke up one day to another got him desperate, pacing around, fighting with his own thoughts in a manic state.
He had never felt that before. He knew nothing about love.
So he did what he knew best. Ignore.
But we all know him, he isn't the kind of guy who can just let something (someone in this case) go...
He watches you from afar. He has studied your antics, your movements, how you express yourself with other people, with your classmates, with the teachers. He learned about you just by observing, and now he could easily read you. That was something that kept his mind at ease. Without talking to you, at least he could know what happened in your mind by just looking at you.
A few days later, you came down from your dorm with puffy eyes. He knew something was off. No one noticed because you made a pretty good job hiding it behind makeup, but he could tell, and he was about to figure out what happened.
You were preparing your breakfast. Something quiet shitty, Bakugo thought, but it wasn't his priority in that moment.
"What's wrong?" He asked directly.
He hasn't talked to you in months, so you were impressed that he decided to share space and air with you, let alone ask something so private.
"What do you care?" No one could blame you for your response. The bastard has ignored you after spending every day with you since you both were six years old. You didn't need his sympathy.
"I care," he said, leaning in the kitchen table, looking at your eyes. They were red and swollen but beautiful too. He had forgotten how you looked like up close. The butterflies in his stomach woke up instantly, but he didn't fight them this time.
"I'm not having a good week, that's all" you explained pouring some artificial cereal on your bowl.
He took that from you and exchanged for granola and oatmeal.
"I hate seeing your face like that. After class, I'm taking you to that ice cream shop you like, " he said nonchalantly like it wasn't one of the biggest gestures that he had done since you came to UA.
You couldn't help but smile. Maybe you could fix your relationship after all.
"It's winter, Katsuki," you stated, testing boundaries.
"Yeah, as if that had stopped you before" he rolled his eyes and flicked your forehead.
In the end, after he grabbed you by the arm and tossed you all the way to the ice cream shop, you came with the conclusion that Bakugo Katsuki knew about love in his own way and you were more than ready to explore that path alongside him.
#bakugo headcanons#bakugo x reader#bnha bakugou#mha x reader#my hero academia#bakugo smut#bakugou smut#my hero academy fanfiction#katsuki bakugo x reader#mha bakugo katsuki#mha bakugo x reader#mha bakugou#mha#bnha bakugo katsuki#bnha x reader#bnha#boku no hero academia#bakugo katsuki#bakugou x reader#bakugou katsuki#katsuki bakugou
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bleh everything SUCKS
#sisters stupid freind/both our roommate is HORRIBLE#hes so controlling and decided hes in charge of of her#she bought a fish. something that doesnt affect him in the slightest. and hes furious with her#hes like. saying it will cause issues in their friendship if she doesnt get rid of it. hes not even saying that its a problem because he#doenst wanna deal with it bc he has acknowledged that it doesnt affect him. hes angry bc he thinks it was impulsive and irrisposible#which like 1. it wasnt and shes beentalking about getting one for years and can probably afford and take care of it and 2. even uf it was#its not a decision that affects him so he has no right. shes an adult who can make her own choices even if theyre are bad ones#hes so mean to her all the time and demands all her time. talks down all her friends. insults her for wanting a relationship. refuses to#listen to any of her problems or support her and refuses to let her talk about any of her interests he doesnt share either#talks down every hobby she has. calls all of it stupid and a waste of money even though he soends SO much money on clothes all the time#and he gets angry with her when she isnt into the stuff he is (mostly shows). even when she agrees to watch it with him he gets angry if#she isnt as into it as she is. hes just decided theyre in a relationship which means shes not allowed to pursue anyone but he is also not#interested in her in the way she wants. he insults her for wanting anything more out of a relationship bc hes content without it rn#hes awful. i hate him. i dont wanna live with him another year. i dont want her to lose him totally bc theyve been freinds for so long and#she really cares about him but fucking hell. they should NOT live together. gonna apply to some places. this lease ends in 3-4 months so#theres not much time for me to adjust but if im adjusted in time then maybe we will go get an apartment just us 2#and then maybe she can get a fucking support dog like she needs bc shes disabled but he refuses to let her get
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Push him
masterlist ko-fi ao3
Avenger! Bucky Barnes x PR manager! Reader
Summary: When you became Avenger’s PR manager, you basically got your dream job, but one particular man, who had been staring at you every single time you were around, made you wonder whether it was because he hated or liked you.
Word count: 6.8K
Warnings: smut, bucky is obsessed with your short skirts, bucky is recovering, grumpy x sunshine, good friend natasha romanoff, office sex, oral sex (f), unprotected sex, creampie, dirty talk, pet names
Author's note: ‼️so if you haven't seen my previous post, this is my new account. you may have seen this work on my old one (@inmyicyworld) but it was terminated and @support doesn't respond to me. please, follow and share this work. I'm going to reupload all of my old fanfics and hope to get your support ❤️
The work at the Avengers Tower wasn’t what you expected it to be. Tony Stark found you while you were working for another company a little bit more than a month ago. He was amazed by the way you were dealing with problems, by your charisma, and by your ability to find a common language with everyone. That’s how he knew that he had to have you as his partner and a part of the team.
The next day, you got a call directly from Tony, asking you to quit your job and accept his offer to work as Avenger’s PR manager. It would be an understatement to say that your jaw dropped to the floor when you heard your salary.
He said that you were totally worth it and that working with a group of such different people was not easy, but he was sure that you would be perfect at this. So on that exact day, you decided to take a risk and accept the challenge.
One thing that you hated about your previous job was the strict dress code. It was simply far from your style because you hated wearing the same basic and boring clothes every day. Tony said that it was the last thing that he cared about, and in that building, no one was obligated to wear certain clothes.
You knew that it was your lucky ticket.
He was actually really friendly and funny in person. You talked a lot during your first day while he was showing you all the necessary places in the tower: your office, his lab, common rooms and kitchens, avenger’s rooms, and even a beautiful garden on the roof. By the way, Tony allowed you to decorate your office however you wanted and gave you the number of the person who was responsible for this.
In short, it was perfect.
You were giddy with excitement on your first actual day of work. According to the plan, you had to meet with the Avengers and then arrange a few meetings for Tony.
It felt like you spent hours before your mirror deciding what to wear. Your whole room was a mess, and when you finally completed your look, which consisted of a short black skirt, beige long sleeve and a brown leather jacket on top, it was already time to go.
Everyone in the room heard you before they saw you because of the sound of your heels clicking on the wood floor.
“Don’t tell me that this is our PR manager, Stark.” Black Widow looked you up and down with a smirk on her face. “You look good, hun. Finally, someone with a taste in this boring group of losers, besides me and Wanda, of course.”
“Hi.” You nicely smiled, not ready to get a compliment as soon as you stepped into the room.
“Ohh, she’s also the sweet one.” Another red-headed woman, Wanda, said with a smile.
“You both, shut up.” Tony stood up from the armchair with a pack of chips in one hand and threw the other one over your shoulder. “Want some?” He asked you, showing the food, but you slightly shook your head. “Whatever… Now, you all listen here, this is Y/N; she’s our new PR manager. I stole her from someone because she’s incredibly smart and good at her job. Starting from this moment, she’s going to cover up your asses and organize all this stupid media stuff.” You blushed at his words but were still silent. “So, this is Natasha, Wanda, Steve, Bucky, and Th—wait, you already know them, right?”
“Yeah, of course I do.” You chuckled. “By the way, it’s nice to meet all of you. I hope we can work together, and I will have a chance to be helpful.” You took a look at all the Avengers in the room, and everyone looked at you with a smile except one person, whose eyes sent shivers down your spine.
When you looked at Bucky, you saw that his eyes were scanning your body with an unreadable expression, and you suddenly felt really weird in your short skirt. Your eyes met, and his famous death stare was really quite scary. He didn’t like you? You two were staring at each other for a few seconds, and you believe that the rest of the team noticed it because Steve loudly cleared his throat to get your attention.
He asked you a few questions about you, and Clint and Sam made a few jokes. Everything was fine as you all chatted for a little bit until Tony said that everyone should get ready for tomorrow’s mission, and you too have a lot to do.
You went back to your office only with the thought that, during this whole time, Bucky was staring at you like he wanted to burn a hole in your head.
Later that day, Bucky was sitting at the kitchen island with a cup of already-cold coffee while Steve was making himself dinner. It was quiet besides the sound of the cooking food, or at least Bucky didn’t listen to Steve’s words because he was too deep in his thoughts.
Well, he was mostly thinking about you and his mixed feelings about this interaction. As soon as you walked into the room, you had his whole attention. He couldn’t help but stare at your body, at your open legs, and at your smiley face. He knew that he sounded like a total creep and that it was inappropriate to look at other people this way, but he had never seen women dress this way. Was it normal right now? Was it new fashion trends or something? The only women that he had been interacting with for the past few years were women from Wakanda, and in the tower it was mostly Nat and Wanda, and he had never seen them dress like that. Or, at least, he just didn’t care enough to notice it.
When he saw you today, he felt something in him, and he didn’t like that feeling. It was something new, something that he had never experienced before, but his body became tense and his stomach tightened. It was weird.
“What, you're still trying to process her?” He was distracted from his thoughts by Sam, who came to the kitchen to grab a bottle of cold water from the fridge. Bucky looked at him and furrowed his brows when he saw a shitty smirk.
“What the fuck are you talking about? And why are you smiling like an idiot?” Bucky growled.
“Because you’re thinking about Y/N.” His words caught Steve’s attention, and he came closer.
“That’s why you two were staring at each other like that?” Steve said this while drying his hands with a towel. “Do you like her? I think she seems cute.”
“No, I don’t. She just looks... different.”
“Oh, the old man got excited by the beautiful woman and her short skirt.” Sam’s smile got even wider as he started teasing Bucky. “You know, I wanted to ask her out, but I can take a step back if you like her.” He leaned on the table so he could get under Bucky’s skin even more.
“I do not like her.”
“So you’re okay if I ask her out? Maybe I should go to her office right now.” Sam pretended like he was really thinking about this.
“Sam...” Steve said.
“You both are just getting on my fucking nerves.” Bucky’s chair almost fell to the floor when he angrily stood up. “Do whatever the fuck you want, I don’t care about you or her.” With these words, he stormed out of the room, and Sam started to laugh out loud.
“You didn’t have to do that, you know?” Steve shook his head like a disappointed mother whose kids always fight.
“That was fun, and maybe it’ll push him to ask her out. She’s hot, but not my type; I’m just trying to help this idiot.”
You have been working with the Avengers for over a month now. This work was literally a dream from any angle. You were making a lot of money, doing the job that you really liked, and found a lot of close friends.
Almost everyone on the team was very close to you. Natasha and Wanda were particularly your best friends. Sam was the funniest person you’ve ever met, and he always found time to tease you or to make a compliment. Bruce and Clint were like your uncles—a little bit old and annoying, but always with a piece of advice for you. A few times, you and Steve met at the gym when you came to work too early, so he was happy to train with you. Who would’ve thought that Captain America himself would teach you how to throw a punch?
The only pain in your ass was Bucky Barnes. Well, to be fair, he didn’t do anything. You’re not even sure that you heard his voice. He was always just staring. Any time that you came to the room and he was there, you either saw him from the corner of your eyes or felt his burning gaze on your back.
To this day, you had no problems with your job. You organized a few interviews for Tony and Steve, talked to the newspapers and magazines, and held some meetings, but right now, sitting on your white chair, you felt weirdly nervous.
Bucky had to come here any minute to talk about a recent accident. Apparently, he almost knocked out someone on the street. All the press and news sources were taking advantage of the situation and using loud headlines to cast a shadow on Bucky and get more views. “The Winter Soldier is back?”. “The Winter Soldier almost killed an innocent man on the street.”
It has been the biggest topic on the internet for the past few hours. Most of the people were furious and wrote too many inappropriate and rude things. So you asked FRIDAY to call Bucky so you could know the whole situation and give comments to the press as soon as possible.
You started thinking about what you should do, or, to be more honest, how to behave around Bucky, because a few days ago two red-headed women that you now considered your best friends assured you that he is in love with you and just doesn't know what to do with it.
You told them everything about his weird actions—that he always looked at you, checked your clothes, and stayed silent. Natasha and Wanda just looked at each other with smirks on their faces.
“Why are you looking at each other like that?” You arched an eyebrow and crossed your hands across your chest.
“Please, don't tell me that you don't understand his behavior.” Natasha looked at you and sipped her coffee.
Well, I wouldn’t have asked you if I knew the reason.”
“Honey, he lust likes you and thinks that you’re hot. You remember that he’s actually an old man, right? Women from his time didn’t dress like that, and you look really sexy.” Wanda’s words made Nat nod her head as you looked weirdly at both of them.
“That’s bullshit, Wanda. This can’t be true. I'm sure that he just doesn’t like me and thinks that I look too revealing. Or he just hadn’t had a girlfriend in a long time.”
“Some time ago, I came to the kitchen at like 2 a.m. just in my lingerie because I thought everyone was asleep. Barnes was sitting there with a book, and you know what? He just said “Hi” and didn’t even look at me again while I was making a sandwich. And when he sees you, he just can’t take his eyes away and stares like an idiot.”
You stayed silent, thinking about the girls' words, because everything seemed pretty reasonable.
“And what should I do?”
“I don’t know, seduce him or something.” Natasha just casually said it, and your eyebrows flew to your hairline.
“Wait, do you like him?” Wanda asked you, and Natasha huffed like it was obvious.
“I mean… he’s beautiful. I didn’t have a chance to talk to him, but Steve and Sam love him, and I trust their opinion.” You stopped trying to put together your thoughts. “To be honest, sometimes I think about the fact that he’s probably one of the hottest people I’ve ever seen. When we studied history at school, all the girls fell in love with America's Boy, and I with his best friend.”
“Then don’t wait. Just give him some hints, because I swear, for the ladies’ man, he’s too slow.” Natasha’s words made you smile. “Try to get closer to him; I don’t know, flash him with your boobs and look at the reaction. Push him a little bit. He’ll break.”
The loud knock on the door almost made you jump out of your chair.
“Come in.” You said this as you stood up and fixed your white dress and cardigan.
Bucky came probably to the lightest and most cozy room in the whole tower. A lot of white and pastel colors, comfy sofa and armchairs, and paintings on the wall. And in the middle of this was you—always perfectly looking, in heels, in a too-short dress, and with a smile on your face. He couldn't stop himself from looking at the smooth skin of your legs. It’s probably so soft...
“Em– Hi.” You awkwardly stood while his eyes were scanning your body. He didn’t answer; he just nodded. “So I think that we can sit there, it’s more comfortable.” You wave your hand at the sofa with a fluffy cover on it. “Do you want anything? Tea, coffee, water, soda?” Bucky just shook his head while he was trying to comfortably sit with a frown on his face.
You deeply inhaled while trying to be a professional. You didn’t know what was wrong with this man, but his behavior started to get on your nerves.
“Bucky, we can’t work together if you keep ignoring me. You can say if you don’t like something, because I don’t want to be on bad terms with anyone.” You sat across from him and crossed your legs.
“I don’t know what I should say.” His deep voice filled the room. Bucky took a pillow that was lying near him and started playing with the fringe. “I feel weird when I’m around you, and I don’t like it. I have thoughts that I shouldn’t have.” His eyes scanned your body once again, and you wondered if he was talking about what you thought.
“Can I do something to change it?”
“No.” He deeply inhaled. “It’s my own problem, and it’s not your job to try to fix it. Anyway, why am I here?”
“I think you know why. I need to ask you about the recent incident because I have a meeting with the press in less than an hour, and I have to give them a good reason why you did that. People didn’t take all that information too well.” You saw that Bucky sadly smiled and looked you directly in the eyes, making goosebumps appear on your skin. “So, tell me what’s happened.”
“You know that whatever you say won’t change people’s opinions about me, right? No one forgave me, and they’re still looking for a chance to call me a murderer.” He tried to hide behind a smile, but you saw everything written in his eyes. Bucky hurt himself with his own words.
“I understand how you feel about this whole situation, but we should address all those rumors because things might get worse.” You leaned on your knees with your hands, and Bucky’s eyes immediately fell on your boobs.
Push him a little bit. He’ll break.
You tried to hold back a smirk.
“Fuck.” He mumbled. “ I– um– I was walking from the coffee shop to the tower. It was another busy street with hundreds of people, but I still didn’t expect someone to touch me. That man jumped on my back or something, and my instincts just worked. I threw him over myself on the ground and put a hand on his throat. Turned out he wanted to take a picture. But I panicked because there are many people who want to take revenge and who might want to do it literally any second. I’m always ready for this.” He shrugged like it was nothing, but you could hear the pain in his voice.
You felt deeply sorry for the man before you. Even if he was cold and acted weird around you, you knew that it was his way to protect himself. After everything he came through, you couldn’t blame him.
“Do you still go to the therapist?” You gently asked.
“Yes, two times a week.” Bucky nervously ran his right hand through his hair while still holding your pillow in the metal one.
“Okay, that’s good; I can work with this information.” You nodded and reached for your journal on the coffee table. “Thank you for sharing this with me, Bucky. I really appreciate it. I’ll do my best to convince people that it was not your fault, okay?”
“Thank you, Y/N.” Bucky stood up, carefully putting your pillow in its place, and left your office without another word, while you were sitting there with a smile.
Maybe the girls were right.
After that day, everything between you and Bucky became even weirder. Yes, he wasn’t totally silent now, and you’ve got a few “Hi”, but his stares felt different.
It was like you two were playing some kind of game. Since you knew that he didn’t actually hate you, you tried to do as Natasha and Wanda said—get his attention and push more. And God, you loved that game.
Almost every day you found an opportunity or excuse to see him in common rooms or in the corridors of the Tower, and you made sure that Bucky noticed you. You wore tighter clothes, walked right past him, and looked at him with a smile. You knew that it was working because a few times Bucky just suddenly left the room while he was mumbling something.
It was almost 8 p.m., but you were still working on schedule for the next week. There was some kind of charity event, and Tony required you to convince everyone to go there because more Avengers can attract more sponsors and money. As always, Bucky was the one who refused to go there. He simply sees no reason for him to be there, and he doesn’t want to be there alone because he knows that Captain America will be the biggest star, and such a social butterfly as Sam will leave him in a second.
You decided that it would be better to talk to Bucky in person, but you didn’t want to lose a chance to get his attention, so you went by yourself instead of asking FRIDAY.
You looked in the small mirror to check your makeup and hair and went straight to where you knew Bucky was spending his evening. As you walked in a dark room filled with only light from the TV, you saw Sam and Steve sitting on the couch and Bucky on the armchair near them. You quietly walk to him and just casually sit on the armrest. His eyebrows flew to his hairline, and you heard that the chewing from the boys stopped. Bucky had no choice but to put his metal arm on your lower back.
“I need you in my office. You have to talk about the next charity event. Could you please give me some of your time?” You quietly asked and lowered yourself closer to him. Bucky was just staring at you for a few seconds, but then slightly nodded.
Bucky followed you to your office, not without getting smirks from the boys,and then stood near your table with his hands in his pockets.
“Don’t you want to sit?” You said and stepped closer to him.
“No.”
“Um– okay.” You took the papers from your table and stood in front of Bucky. “So, you know that there is going to be a charity event, and I’m responsible for getting all the Avengers there, and you are one of them.”
“I’m not going, I already told Tony.” He just shrugged.
“Why not?”
“Because I’m not needed there. I’m not an actual hero, people have no interest in me, especially when there will be Iron Man, Captain America, and Thor, you know? Plus, I have no interest in sitting alone the whole night.” You saw that Bucky tried to be casual about it, but he just put salt on his own wound.
“Don’t say that, Bucky. There are people who want to see you there, you have a lot of fans. You know, I’m going there too, so if you don't mind, we can–”
“What game are you playing with me?” He interrupted you. Bucky straightened his shoulders, which made him look even bigger, and started moving closer to you, putting you in a trap between him and your desk.
“W– what do you mean?” You couldn't control your body as you started to tremble a little bit from the power that this man had. As soon as you bumped into the table, his hands landed on both sides of you, and his face was right in front of yours.
“Don’t act clueless, Y/N. I see what you’re doing.” He stopped for a second, studying your face. “You know, I tried to convince myself that you do all of this by accident, but now I’m sure that you’re just playing your little game. Am I right, doll?” You two were staring at each other, and you felt almost nauseous from different emotions.
He was so fucking beautiful up close. Piercing blue eyes, pink lips, and light stubble You know why many women thought that James Barnes was charming. If he had more confidence, he would’ve been unstoppable.
Your eyes slowly shifted lower to his arms and chest as you remained silent. He was big, with well-trained muscles that were seen through the tight black t-shirt. Both arms were stretched near you, so you had a really good opportunity to look at the smooth tanned skin and beautiful dark vibranium. You felt how your lower stomach tightened just from the thought of getting those pretty hands on your body…
You were pulled out of your head by a sudden movement of Bucky’s hand, which gripped your face and pushed your lips together. He was obviously dominating in the kiss, as if he were desperate to taste you. The tip of his tongue brushed over your lips, asking for entrance, which you happily gave him. The moan came out of you when Bucky moved away and looked you in the eyes, still holding your face.
“This whole fucking time I thought that I was a creep for looking at you, but now I know that you did everything on purpose, doll.” His eyes moved between your eyes and mouth. “All these short skirts and dresses that almost showed me everything underneath it, all these innocent smiles and looks... You did it to tease me?”
“Not at first...” You mumbled. “But you were acting so weird, and girls said that you liked me and just didn’t know what to do. I wanted to find out whether it was true or not.”
“Fuck, if I knew earlier that this was your plan, I would’ve bent you over the nearest surface, baby.” Bucky moved a little closer, brushing his lips over yours. “Do you know how fucking hot and gorgeous you are? I haven’t felt that way in many, many years. Just wanna kiss you and make you mine.”
“And what’s stopping you from this, Sargent?” You asked with a smile and moved your hand to the back of his neck to gently play with the baby hairs.
“You’re gonna be my death, doll face.” He mumbled before leaning closer and kissing you again.
This time, you started to touch each other's bodies. Bucky’s warm and cold hands landed on your thighs, playing with the hem of the skirt and rubbing your soft skin after he lifted you up a little bit and helped you sit on the table, staying in between your legs. Your own hands were moving up and down his broad chest, discovering all of his muscles.
“Bucky…” You whined into the kiss when his finger brushed against the edge of your already wet panties.
“Tell me.” Bucky moved away from your swollen lips and left a path of kisses down your neck. “Tell me what you want, and I’ll give it to you.” He sucked a sensitive spot under your ear, which made you moan.
“I don’t know. Just do anything, please.” You both breathed heavily. You felt like you were too hot; your lower stomach ached, and your underwear was soaking wet. Bucky was looking at you with such lust in his eyes that you wanted him to destroy you.
“Lay back.” He ordered you as one of his hands went higher under your skirt and slid your black lace panties down your legs. You didn’t miss how Bucky shoved him into the back pocket of his jeans with a smirk on his face.
You quickly followed his instructions and just threw all the papers from our table on the floor. You’ll regret it later, but now you don't care. The sudden move of Bucky's metal arm grabbed and pulled your shirt, and all the buttons scattered on the floor, making you gasp in disbelief.
“Bucky! It was expensive.”
“Sorry, I’ll buy you whatever you want, I promise. But now I need to see you all.” He growled and fell to his knees before you. “Fuck, doll, such a pretty pussy. I’m gonna make a mess with her.”
Bucky’s hands grabbed both of your legs and threw them over his shoulders. He dragged your skirt higher, not wanting to take it off of you. His head fell on your right legs as he left a few kisses on your sensitive skin.
“Bucky please! Don’t tease me!” You desperately whined.
“I need a moment to appreciate both of you. I haven’t done it since the 40's, you know that?”
You wanted to say something, but his mouth on your most delicate part of your body left you speechless and made you grab his hair. Bucky’s tongue was gentle at first, just to get a taste of you and tease you a little bit. His tongue started to play with your clit, circling it and applying different pressures to find out what made your body twitch. It looked like he was enjoying it too; you felt deep grunts escaping his mouth as he was trying to catch every drop that came out of you.
Your loud moans filled the room as Bucky found the perfect place and made motions that made you see stars. A hand in his hair tightened even more when you felt one of his fingers at your entrance.
“M-hm, so wet and tight for me.” He pulled away a little bit, looking at how his two fingers came in and out of you, all shiny with your juices. His darkened eyes were firmly glued to your pussy, which was trying to get more, and his mouth opened a little bit at the sight. “Taking my fingers like a good girl.” Bucky attacked you with his mouth again. This time he was licking your folds, mixing his saliva with your juices. When the feeling of his nose touching your bundle of nerves came through your whole body, you gripped Bucky’s dark locks even harder, particularly trying to ride his face, and he had to put his metal hand on your hips so you wouldn’t move.
Your body tensed when he curled his fingers right on your g-spot, sucking your clit like a hungry man.
“Bucky—fuck, fuck, fuck! I’m gonna cum, please don’t stop!” You whined with tears running down your face.
A few more movements of his magical mouth, and you fell over the edge. Your legs tightened around his head, tingles went all over your body, and the loudest moan mixed with Bucky’s name came out of you as you were riding on the wave of your orgasm.
Bucky didn’t stop, though.
He made sure to lick every drop that came out of you, to the point that you had to beg him to stop because you were too sensitive.
“That was—“ You were trying to catch a breath. “That was the best orgasm I've ever had, oh my god. If you did it for the first time in like seventy years, I can’t imagine what you can do with practice.”
Bucky dragged you up by your neck, so you would be at the same level with him. His hand moved your hips closer to the edge of the table, and you felt how hard he was through those jeans.
“I can practice whenever you’ll allow me, doll.” He put his warm hand on your face to kiss you. The taste of your own release on his tongue made you moan.
“Need you inside of me, please.” Your hands automatically started to pull up his shirt, but he stopped you.
“We don’t have to take it off if you don’t want to.”
You were silent for a few seconds. “Why wouldn’t I want to take your shirt off?”
“You know, my arm and scars...”
“Do you really think that I care about it?” You left a few kisses on his cheek. “I think that your arm is hot, by the way, and I want to feel your skin on mine, Sarge.” It was enough for Bucky to pull off his shirt and stay before you half-naked.
Your hands moved to trace every muscle, every birthmark, and every scar on his chest, and you felt that this moment was so intimate, especially because of Bucky’s stare. He looked at you with such adoration and softness that you wanted to melt.
“You’re amazing, you know that?” He mumbled and kissed you with even more passion.
Bucky ripped off the rest of your shirt and quickly took off your matching black bra, gripping your breasts with both hands and taking your left nipple in his hot mouth.
You dug nails into Bucky’s back as he was sucking and licking your nipples, leaving them wet in the cold air. It felt good. So fucking good—his mouth was truly amazing. But the emptiness inside of you was almost painful, and you were clenching around nothing.
“Bucky! Sarge, please, I need you.” You almost cried and dragged his head by the hair back to your mouth.
“Baby, baby, wait– “ His hot breath was touching your lips, but he stopped your hands, which were unbuckling his belt. “Baby, I don’t have a condom. Fuck, do you have one?”
“We don’t have to use it... I’m on the pill. And I’m clean.” Your legs wrapped tighter around Bucky’s waist and put him closer to your naked core. He swore that he could feel your heat through his jeans and boxers.
“Fuck, I love twenty-first century... I’m clean too, can’t even catch a disease with this serum shit.”
His words were like a green light to you. You didn’t want to wait even a second more. So you just took off his pants with such speed and impatience that it made Bucky chuckle. With the last movement, all of his clothes were on the floor, and you sat on your table, frozen because of the sight before you.
Bucky’s thick and perfectly long dick was the best fucking thing that you’ve ever seen. Pink and a little bit curled to his abdomen. Your mouth watered just thinking about tasting it. Or how well he’ll stretch you out. You didn’t even notice how your mouth opened a little bit, and you unconsciously wrapped your hand around him.
“You’re gonna destroy me, Bucky.” You mumbled, to which you heard only a deep chuckle. Your eyes moved back to Bucky’s smiley face.
“I hope so.”
Two different hands landed on your thighs again, spreading and lifting them up. You both looked down at where his cock almost touched your bare folds, and the first contact made you moan loudly. Bucky took the base of his cock, giving himself a few pumps, and moved the tip up and down your pussy, moving easily because of the mixture of your juices.
You grabbed his forearm and whined at the action.
“Ready, doll?” He was trying to be tough and strong, but you saw how he nervously licked his lips, the tremble of his flesh hand, and the tension in his abdomen. But you still vigorously nodded.
It was different from everything you’ve ever experienced. He was big but tried to be as gentle as possible, not wanting to hurt you. He only pushed a few inches, but you already wanted to cry from all the feelings inside of you. Pain mixed with extreme pleasure.
Bucky was trying so hard to control his motions and go slow, but God, it wasn’t easy. From the first touch of his cock, it felt like he had gone to heaven. He knew that sex was good, he remembers it, but the feeling of you and your warm body that so gracefully greeted him inside made him feral. Bucky felt such a need to kiss you that it was almost painful, especially when your swollen lips were a few inches away from his.
He leaned in closer to your lips, but it made him slip deeper into you, which made you both loudly moan into each other's mouths.
“Fuck– doll, you’re so warm and tight, oh my god.” Bucky mumbled as the grip on your hips became harder. It’ll probably leave bruises, but you didn’t care.
The feeling of him inside of you was overwhelming. He was so deep and stretched you just the way that you wanted, and you almost cried from pleasure.
“Please, Bucky, please move!”
His hips slightly moved once, and it felt like his mood instantly changed. You were suddenly pushed back on your table, and your legs, still in heels, were thrown on Bucky’s shoulders. His metal hand stayed on your thigh, and the other one fell on your stomach to push your skirt higher on your waist.
“All dressed up for me, baby.” He started slowly moving, burying his cock deep inside, and then leaving only the tip to tease you. “You know how long I wanted to do that, huh? Bend you over and just fuck the shit out of you until you can’t say anything except for my name.”
“Bucky– Sarge, please go faster. Just fuck me, do whatever you want.” You were desperate, yes. But you couldn't help but beg, because you really needed him to keep his promise and fuck the shit out of you.
You reached for his hand on your stomach and interlaced your fingers together.
“If you keep calling me that, I won’t last too long, doll.” His thrusts became harder and faster as your body moved up and down on your table.
Bucky was looking at your drunk-looking face with a slightly open mouth because you couldn’t keep your moans quiet. Your hair was deshiveled, your skin glimmered with sweat, and it was the hottest thing he had ever seen.
“So beautiful, baby.” Bucky murmured, fucking you harder. The room was filled with loud noises from slapping skin and moans. “You love it when I talk to you like that, huh? Want me to tell you what a good girl you are?” His words definitely did something to you, and you unconsciously tightened around him. “Almost choking my cock, baby, fu-u-ck.”
“Mhm, Sargent, I’m so full of you.” You couldn’t see straight as the tip of his head pressed at the perfect spot with every thrust, it was too much and not enough at the same time.
The wet kisses on the inner side of your thigh sent shivers down your whole body when Bucky started to suck tender skin. His rough movement didn’t stop for a moment, and you knew that your orgasm was getting closer. The warm feeling in your belly slowly became bigger. It was hard for you to cum from sex, but Bucky did it so fast and without even touching your clit.
“C’mon, doll face. I feel ‘ya. Feel how your perfect little pussy is squeezing me. Cum with me, baby, cum on my cock.” His movements were still rough and confident, but you felt the slightest change in the way he was looking at you, how his body trembled a little bit, and the prettiest quiet noises escaped his mouth as Bucky was coming to his own end.
You were completely lost in your pleasure, with strong arms on your body and Bucky’s hard cock that was completely destroying you, so when fingers on your clit started to move in circles, your body slightly jolted up from your table.
“Bucky, Bucky, please—ohmygod, I’m coming!” You cried out loud and grabbed the hard wood under your arms.
“O-oh, fuck, doll, cum with me, please. Yes, squeeze my cock harder, make a mess. ‘M gonna cum.” With the last few pushes of his dick inside of you and movements of the fingers, you both fell from your heights, and the room filled with loud moans of pleasure. The feeling of his hot seed on your walls almost made you faint.
Bucky fell down on your body as your leg slipped from his shoulder. Two strong arms wrapped around you, and Bucky’s face nuzzled into your neck. You don’t know how long you two stayed silent, trying to catch a breath, while your hands gently rubbed Bucky’s back.
When he finally lifted himself up with a metal arm near your face on the table, the look in his eyes sent millions of butterflies to your stomach.
“I don’t even know what to say…” He chuckled and cupped your face with his right hand. “You look so fucking beautiful, Y/N.”
“Even when my makeup, my hair, and my clothes are completely destroyed?” You playfully arched an eyebrow and enjoyed the feeling of his fingers on your hot skin.
“Well, I did it, and I’m satisfied with it. You still look so hot, especially with my dick still inside of you.”
“Bucky!”
“Sorry, sorry. But I’m serious, though. Will you let me take you on a date? Maybe yesterday for lunch or for dinner after work?” His eyes had this little bit of doubt, and you couldn’t stop your wide smile because he was really thinking that you would say “no” after that.
“I will be glad to go out with you, Buck.” You dragged his face closer and gave him the sweetest kiss you could.
Bucky moved away, gently slipping out of you, and you hissed at the empty feeling. He helped you stand up on your shaking legs and handed you your clothes.
“Fuck, you completely destroyed my clothes.” You said as you were standing in front of the mirror. “How will I go home?”
“You can stay in my room.” Bucky came closer to you and helped you make your blouse look more presentable, even without buttons.
“Really?”
“Of course, doll. Just hold your shirt in case we bump into someone in the corridor, but I think everyone is already in their rooms.” Bucky finished dressing up, and you saw your underwear sticking out of his pocket.
“Don’t you want to give me my panties?”
��Na-ah, you’ll have to walk with me dripping out of you.” He gave you a cocky smile and turned all the lights off before wrapping his arm around you and leading you into the hall.
It was completely empty, but the second that you stepped out of the elevator, you saw Bucky’s best friends looking at you. All of you were looking at each other for a few seconds before Sam started hysterically laughing.
“You owe me fifty bucks, idiot!” He said to Steve, who was as red as a tomato. “Good job, Buckaroo, but I really thought that we were gonna ask her on a date first.”
“Fuck off, Willson.” Bucky growled, protectively stepping forward to protect you from their looks.
“Okay, okay, relax, no one’s touching your girl.” He said with a cocky smile on his face. “Let’s go, Steve. You’re too innocent to look at things like this.” Sam took his friend and led him in another direction.
“Asshole.” Bucky growled.
“Everything is okay, Buck, let’s go.” You stepped closer to his room, but he was still standing in his place. “I have to take a shower. Will you come with me, or will you stand here the whole night?” You smirked.
It was everything he needed to finally get closer to you, scoop you into his arms, and carry you into his room to the sound of laughter, which soon turned into moans.
#bucky barnes smut#the winter soldier#bucky barnes#marvel#bucky x reader#bucky fanfic#bucky x you#james bucky buchanan barnes#winter soldier#james buchanan barnes#james bucky barnes#marvel smut#marvel imagine#marvel x reader#marvel fanfiction#mcu x reader#marvel fanfic#bucky smut#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes x reader
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My Missing Piece
616!Wanda x 199999!Fem!Reader
Summary: You've lost your wife Wanda. Leaving you alone with your twin boys to try and pick up the pieces. What happens when the Scarlet Witch comes looking for her boys?
Word Count: 10.4K
Warnings: 18+ MDNI, R calls W Mommy, W uses pet names, enchanted strap use, Dom!Wanda, sub!reader, overstimulation, magic restraints, depressive thoughts/episodes.
A/N: Made this forever ago and forgot about it until like two days ago lol. I really liked the idea of this so I hope you guys enjoy~ Also I decided that world 199999 (which was the original MCU world number before MoM turned it to 616) is just a parallel world where no one died :)
Every night after tucking my boys, Billy and Tommy in to bed, I have a bit of me time. Sometimes I watch TV, sometimes I'll scroll through social media on my phone, sometimes I'll write because I was told that was supposed to help with grief, it hasn't so far, what helps the most is when I talk to her before bed, "I miss you Wands...our boys miss you too...of course they love their Mama, but you're their Mommy. You carried them for nine months, you were in labor for just over a day." Tommy was born first 12 minutes ahead of his brother Billy. "You gave so much for our boys and our life here and I wish you had never said yes to that mission after all these years..." I break down, quiet sobs wrack me as I curl up on her side of the bed. It still smells like her.
I let sleep take me as I have the same dream I do every night. Wanda, but not Wanda...some twisted version of her with black fingers, and she just seems off, but she's searching, as if she can see me? She's looking for our boys. Every morning just as she finds me, us, I wake up. Dried tears on my cheeks and my eyes red. The bags under my eyes have never been darker, but I cover them up as I get out of bed to start yet another day without my wife.
The alarm blares through the quiet of the room, jolting me awake from my restless slumber. With a heavy sigh, I reach over to silence it, rubbing the sleep from my eyes. Another day begins, much like every other since she left us.
I stumble out of bed, the weight of grief still heavy on my shoulders as I move through the motions of the morning routine. It's a struggle to keep it together, but I have to be strong for Billy and Tommy. They need me, even though every fiber of my being aches for her presence.
As I make my way downstairs, the memories flood back, hitting me like a tidal wave. Wanda was always the light in our lives, her laughter echoing through the halls, her warmth enveloping us like a comforting embrace. But now, there's only emptiness.
I try to push the thoughts aside as I prepare breakfast for the boys, forcing a smile as they bound into the kitchen, their youthful energy a stark contrast to my own weariness. They chatter excitedly about school and friends, oblivious to the pain that lingers beneath the surface.
After they've eaten and headed off to catch the bus, I sink into the solitude of the empty house once more. It's in these quiet moments that the ache is most palpable, the absence of her presence a constant reminder of all that we've lost.
I find myself drawn to her belongings, unable to resist the pull of her memory. Running my fingers over the familiar objects, I'm transported back to happier times, when our love felt invincible, untouchable by the darkness that now threatens to consume me.
But amidst the despair, there's a flicker of something else. A determination, a resolve to keep going, if not for myself then for her. She wouldn't want me to wallow in sorrow, to let the grief consume me. She'd want me to live, to cherish the memories we shared and find solace in the love that still remains.
With a deep breath, I push myself to my feet, wiping away the tears that threaten to fall. Today may be another struggle, another battle against the pain, but I refuse to let it defeat me. For Wanda, for our boys, I'll find the strength to carry on, one day at a time.
The day went by quickly and soon enough the boys were home filling up our home with noise once more,
"Boys homework first or no ice cream!" I call from the kitchen when I hear them start to fight over player one controller.
"Awww but Mama!" They whined.
"So you boys don't want ice cream tomorrow night either I see." I hear them grumble and then the TV go off, the sound of the dining room chairs scraping as I look over my shoulder to see they're working. "There are my good boys." I turn back smiling as I carry on with prepping dinner. Suddenly something feels off. A pit in my stomach starts forming and I feel eyes on me, not the boys though these feel predatory.
I look up and through the window I don't see my own reflection, I see Wanda, the same one I see in my dreams.
My heart leaps into my throat as I freeze, the knife in my hand forgotten as I stare wide-eyed at the impossible sight before me. It's her, but it's not. The twisted version from my nightmares, black fingers reaching out like tendrils of darkness, eyes filled with a hunger I can't comprehend.
I feel a chill run down my spine as her gaze locks onto mine, a shiver of fear coursing through my veins. Instinctively, I reach for the pendant hanging around my neck, fingers brushing against the smooth surface of the purple power stone embedded within. It's a comforting weight, a reminder of the power that pulses through me, but even it feels insignificant in the face of this apparition.
"What do you want?" I manage to choke out, my voice barely above a whisper. But she doesn't answer, only continues to stare, her presence suffocating in its intensity.
Desperation claws at the edges of my mind as I struggle to make sense of the situation. Is this some kind of illusion, a trick of the mind brought on by grief and exhaustion? Or is she truly here, some twisted echo of the woman I loved?
Before I can gather my thoughts, a sudden crash from the dining room snaps me back to reality. The boys, my precious boys, oblivious to the danger that lurks just beyond our walls. With a surge of adrenaline, I lunge forward, grabbing the nearest weapon within reach.
But as I turn back to face the window, she's gone, vanished into thin air like a wisp of smoke. The only evidence of her presence is the lingering sense of unease that hangs heavy in the air.
I rush to the dining room, relief flooding through me as I find the boys unharmed, their laughter filling the room once more. But even as I hold them close, a sense of dread lingers, a silent reminder that darkness still lurks just beyond the edges of our reality.
"Mama is everything okay?" Billy asks as I hold them, kissing the top of their heads.
"I just thought one of you got hurt. I'm happy you boys aren't." I lie to them as to not worry them, but Billy looks at me trying to search my thoughts. "Hey no mind reading little man." I ruffle his hair. "Everything is fine. If you boys are finished you can play one game, dinner will be ready in 15 minutes." The minutes tick by slowly as I finish preparing dinner, the aroma of comfort food filling the air. I glance at the clock, realizing that my boys are engrossed in their game, blissfully unaware of the turmoil swirling within me.
With a heavy sigh, I take a moment to compose myself before calling them to the table. As we gather for the meal, laughter and chatter resuming, I try to push the unsettling encounter out of my mind. But deep down, I know it's not over.
As we eat, the boys share stories from their day, their infectious joy momentarily easing the ache in my heart. I force a smile, savoring these small moments of normalcy in our fractured world.
After dinner, as the boys retreat to their rooms for the night, I find myself once again standing by the window, staring into the darkness beyond. The pit in my stomach returns, the unease settling in as I feel a presence lingering just out of sight.
The room is silent, save for the hum of the refrigerator and the distant sounds of the night. I close my eyes, summoning the courage to speak the words that linger on the tip of my tongue.
"Wanda, if you're out there, if you can hear me, please... don't hide. I don't know what's happening, but I can't face it alone. I need you, now more than ever." My voice trembles with a mix of desperation and longing.
The air remains still, the response elusive. I wait in silence, hoping for some sign, some reassurance that I'm not losing my mind. But the universe remains silent, withholding its secrets.
"Gods I feel like I'm going crazy Wands...how am I supposed to do this without you?" I feel the hot tears in my eyes, streak down my cheeks then suddenly a loud bang from the living room, the sound of a portal. "Stephan? Is that you?" It wasn't uncommon for Stephan Strange to pop in and check on me and the boys. Stephan had lost his love many years ago. Before I reach the living room, I hear the familiar sound of heels clicking on my hard wood flooring. Suddenly I'm standing face to face with the Wanda I've seen in my dreams...."W-Wands?" I questioned,
"A version. I've lost something precious to me and I've come to get it back." I look her over. It's Wanda, but not mine. As I get closer, Her hair is a different shade, her eyes are a little less of an emerald green and more of a sea green, this Wanda has a scar on her forehead, just above her left eyebrow.
"Oh...what has your universe done to you Detka?" I ask softly reaching out and she grabs my wrist with a force.
"It took everything from me." She seethed. "I want my boys back. I'm taking them." She tosses me aside like I'm nothing. Luckily with the power stone embedded in my chest. I push back, barreling back into her. Tackling her to the ground until I'm on top of her and it's then that she notices my stone, "You have the power stone...how? That's impossible. I've seen it kill people that touch it.
"I'm tough that's why my Wanda loved me." I had her pinned and used my own magic to subdue her. "I've been called the Violet Witch here for years. It became my code name."
"That can't be..." I give her a questioning look. "I'm the Scarlet Witch." She tells me, the scarlet witch? Wanda never said anything...? I stumble back off of her, reeling, "The Scarlet Witch." I let out a dry chuckle, "It makes sense, but I can't let you take my boys. If I loose them then That means I've lost my Wanda and them. I might as well die." I tell her,
"Wait so your Wanda is gone?" She asks. I nod,
"She was needed for a mission. I begged her not to go, we had retired from being Avengers 10 years ago when we found out she was pregnant. She told me everything would be fine. She promised me...and then suddenly I have Strange and Parker on my doorstep with Bucky and Sam behind them carry the casket." I feel my eyes blur as I walk over to the scarlet witch, "If you are another her then," I take her hands putting them up to my temples and ease my forehead onto her, letting my memories over the past ten years flood through her mind.
As our minds intertwine, I feel a rush of memories flooding into her consciousness. The love, the loss, the moments of joy and heartache that have shaped my existence since Wanda's departure. It's a whirlwind of emotions, a bittersweet symphony of love and grief that binds us together in ways I never thought possible.
For a moment, there's a flicker of recognition in her eyes, a glimmer of understanding amidst the chaos of her own turmoil. She sees the depth of my pain, the desperation to hold onto the fragments of a life that's slipping through my fingers.
But as quickly as it came, the moment passes, and she pulls away, her expression hardening once more. "I'm sorry for your loss," she says, her voice tinged with a hint of sympathy. "But my pain is just as real. I've lost everything too, and I'll do whatever it takes to reclaim what's mine."
I feel a pang of empathy for her, a shared sense of anguish that transcends the boundaries of our separate worlds. But beneath it all, there's a primal instinct, a fierce determination to protect my boys at all costs.
"I understand your pain," I reply, my voice steady despite the turmoil raging within. "But my boys are not yours to take. They belong here, with me, with their family."
She narrows her eyes, her resolve unwavering. "Then we're at an impasse," she says, her tone final. "I won't leave without them."
I take a step forward, meeting her gaze with steely determination. "Then I guess we'll just have to see who's stronger," I say, my voice echoing with a newfound resolve.
With that, the battle lines are drawn, two versions of Wanda Maximoff facing off against each other in a clash of wills and power. But amidst the chaos and uncertainty, one thing remains clear: no matter the outcome, I'll do whatever it takes to protect my boys and honor the memory of the woman I loved.
Her eyes meet mine, a mixture of pain and longing mirrored in their depths. The tear I wiped away lingers on her cheek, a testament to the shared sorrow we both carry. The silence stretches between us, heavy with unspoken emotions, and for a moment, time seems to hang suspended.
"I... I don't know if I can stay," she whispers, her voice choked with emotion. "But the offer, it means more than you can imagine. In my world, everything has crumbled, and I'm left with nothing but ashes and echoes of what once was."
I can feel the weight of her words, the burden of her grief, and I tighten my grip on her cheek, desperate to convey the sincerity of my plea. "Wanda, you don't have to face this alone. You're not just a version of her; you're your own person, with your own pain. But here, in this universe, you have a chance to rebuild, to find a new kind of family."
She opens her eyes, the sea-green gaze locking onto mine. There's a vulnerability in her expression, a crack in the stoic facade she wears. "I'm so tired," she admits, a raw honesty in her voice. "Tired of loss, tired of fighting. Maybe... maybe it's time for a different path."
A tentative smile plays on her lips, and my heart skips a beat. I wipe away another tear, this time a tear of relief. "You don't have to decide now," I say softly. "Take the time you need. But know that here, you have people who care, people who understand loss and are willing to help you carry the burden."
The room seems to brighten, as if the weight of the universe has lifted, if only for a moment. And in that moment, I see a glimmer of hope, a possibility for healing and connection that transcends the boundaries of our fractured worlds.
"I need to know one thing." She speaks, "Is Vision alive?" my brows furrow together.
"Vision? Who is that?" I ask genuinely confused.
"Wait...how did we meet here?" She asks.
"Oh well we met in Sokovia. We were protesting Stark together at a rally. Your brother flirted with me first and I never let him live that down especially when I married you and he was my best man." I smile at the memory. "Anyways, we were approached by Hydra and experimented on. They had the mind stone and the power stone. You and Pietro were exposed to the mind stone and I was too, but nothing happened unlike you two so they put me in a room with the power stone. It decided my chest was it's forever home. I ended up breaking us out from the Hydra base with the help of the Avengers who had caught word of the base. The three of us joined the Avengers and the rest is history." I tell her.
"So no Ultron? Sokovia didn't fly in the air? What about the Sokovia accords?" She throws question after question.
"No idea what you're talking about love. We carried on doing small missions, taking down hydra and radicals, but the three of us spent a long time training before they let us out doing field work." I tell her.
"Three? Is...is Pietro..?" Her voice breaks.
"Alive? Yeah of course." She falls to her knees and starts sobbing.
"Mommy?" Billy is at the middle of the stairs and the look in Wanda's eyes.
"Yeah baby it's Mommy." Wanda opened her arms and the little speedster found his way into her arms." Her eyes spilling over tears.
"Mama said you weren't coming back." Billy whispered.
"Mama didn't think I was, but Mommy always finds a way back to her boys." Wanda pulls back and looks up at me. "I'm staying...how could I say no when this is just about the most perfect version I could ask for?" I smile and start crying again as Tommy joins us before I can even blink. "Our little quick silver." Wanda smiles hugging the boys, her boys.
Tears of relief blur my vision as I watch Wanda embrace our boys, her boys, with a tenderness that speaks volumes. Billy and Tommy cling to her, their small arms wrapping around her tightly as if afraid she'll disappear again if they let go. And in that moment, I realize that this is where she belongs, with us, her family.
I join them on the floor, wrapping my arms around them all, unable to contain the overwhelming flood of emotions that threatens to consume me. "Welcome home, Wanda," I whisper, my voice choked with tears.
She looks up at me, her eyes shining with gratitude and love. "Thank you," she says softly, her voice trembling with emotion. "For everything."
Together, we sit in the warmth of our embrace, a makeshift family forged from the ashes of our shared past. And as the night stretches on, I can't help but feel a glimmer of hope amidst the darkness, a belief that no matter what trials may come, as long as we have each other, we can weather any storm.
========================
The days blurred together in a haze of longing and uncertainty, each moment tinged with the ache of what could have been. Wanda's presence in our home was both a blessing and a curse, a constant reminder of the love I had lost and the impossibility of reclaiming what was once mine.
I watched her interact with the boys, her smile forced but genuine, her laughter a melody that echoed through the halls. And yet, beneath the surface, I could sense the weight of her own grief, the burden of a past that refused to let her go.
I tried to be strong, to be there for her and the boys, but every smile felt like a lie, every laugh a hollow echo of the joy we once shared. And in the darkness of the night, when sleep eluded me and the silence pressed in like a vice, I found myself haunted by memories of another Wanda, a version of her that existed only in my dreams.
She was so close, yet so far away, a phantom presence that taunted me with what could have been. I longed to reach out to her, to hold her close and whisper words of love and comfort. But she was gone, lost to me in a reality that no longer existed.
And so I forced myself out of bed each morning, steeling myself against the pain that threatened to consume me. I buried myself in the routines of daily life, seeking solace in the mundane tasks that kept me tethered to reality.
But no matter how hard I tried to push her memory away, she lingered in the shadows of my mind, a ghostly specter that refused to be forgotten. And as the days turned into weeks, I began to wonder if I would ever find peace, if I would ever be able to let go of the love that still bound me to her, even across the vast expanse of the multiverse.
My Wanda and I had always had a policy of no mind reading since we could both do it, but this Wanda pokes at my thoughts constantly. Reminds me to smile through telepathy. One morning after a really good dream with another Wanda I can't get myself out of bed. Everything is too much. I know I had told her I'd be fine, but I'm not.
"Come on Y/N. Time to get up." I turn away from her, curling up into a ball further. "Y/N? What's wrong?" She asks.
"Nothing just tired. Just tell the boys I don't feel good. I need a Mama's day. So they can have a Mommy day. Take them out, get them ice cream. Do whatever you want." I grumble.
"Okay..." I close my eyes, letting myself drift back off just needed to see her again.
I don't know how much time has past when I'm being woken up, "Detka...come on wake up." My eyes blink into focus as I look at Wanda sitting above me and smile, forgetting my reality for a moment before my smile drops.
"What?" I ask.
"I dropped the boys off with their uncle for the weekend." I sit up straight,
"You did what!?" I screech.
"I left them with Pietro for the weekend. He was more than happy to have a boys weekend. Something about taking them to the lake?" Wanda mentions.
"He takes them every summer, usually it's a family thing and we all go." I tell Wanda.
"Well I figured you needed a Mommy and me weekend. I want to take you out. I want to get to know you. I already know my boys, but you. You're different, new, you aren't like Vision. You're human." She cups my cheek, smiling and I know it's a genuine smile. "I'm sure you've been feeling neglected and I wanted to try and do this sooner, but the boys were too excited to have me back." She says as I lean into her touch, Gods how I missed her touch. Though her fingers were no longer black her nails seemed to permanently stay black which made me laugh as I compared it to her emo phase which apparently this Wanda had one too.
"Thank you," I whisper, my voice catching in my throat. "For understanding."
She smiles, a warmth in her eyes that belies the weight of her own pain. "We're in this together. You don't have to carry the burden alone."
With her words echoing in my mind, I find the strength to push myself out of bed, to face the day with renewed determination. Wanda's offer of a Mommy and me weekend is a lifeline, a chance to rediscover myself amidst the chaos of grief and longing.
As we spend the day together, exploring the city and sharing stories of our pasts, I feel a sense of peace settle over me, a reassurance that maybe, just maybe, there's still hope for a future filled with love and laughter.
And as the sun sets on our day together, I realize that while Wanda may not be my Wanda, she's still a beacon of light in the darkness, a reminder that even in our darkest moments, there's always someone willing to stand by our side, to offer a hand to hold and a shoulder to lean on.
With her by my side, I know that no matter what the future may hold, I'll never have to face it alone. And as we head home, the weight of grief feels a little lighter, the shadows a little less daunting, as we embrace the possibility of a new beginning, together.
When we got back home, I pulled her to the couch, "Time to watch sitcoms." I tell her and her face lights up.
"Dick Van Dyke?" She asks.
"No Detka. I want to show you my favorite this time. It's a more modern one. It's an animated sitcom though is that okay?" I ask, realizing this Wanda maybe never experienced animated and only enjoyed live action ones.
"Of course dorogoya." Her accent popping out sent a wave through me that landed between my legs.
"O-okay good." I say and get 'Bob's Burgers' playing. As the show starts I settle in with a slight distance between us, but she pulls me in against her side.
"Is this okay dorogoya?" She asks looking down at me.
"Y-yeah...of course." I move slight, readjusting to get comfortable as we fit together like two missing puzzle pieces and I let out a sigh of relief, that feels like so much weight is taken off my shoulders.
As the episodes of "Bob's Burgers" played on, I found myself relaxing into Wanda's embrace, the tension that had been coiled tight within me slowly unraveling with each passing moment. Her warmth seeped into my bones, a comforting presence that chased away the lingering shadows of doubt and fear.
With her by my side, the laughter that bubbled up from the screen felt genuine, a reflection of the newfound camaraderie we shared. And as I stole glances at her profile, illuminated by the soft glow of the television, I couldn't help but marvel at the beauty of the moment, the simplicity of just being together.
Her laughter mingled with mine, the sound music to my ears, a symphony of joy that filled the room with warmth and light. And as the credits rolled on the final episode, I turned to her, a smile playing at the corners of my lips.
"Thank you," I said softly, my voice barely above a whisper. "For today. For everything."
She returned my smile, her eyes shimmering with affection. "Anytime. I'm here for you, always."
I sat there staring at her, getting lost in her eyes so much that I don't even realize that she's leaning in until she's inches from my lips, she stops and I can feel her breath on me, my own hitching,
"Is this okay dorogoya?" She whispers in a husk against my lips.
"Y-yes." I manage out as she kisses me softly at first, testing the waters, but soon enough she's kissing hungrily, like she's starving for my taste now that's she's had a nibble. My fingers find their way into her hair, getting tangled in her auburn locks. One of her hands is on the back of my neck and the other is on my hip, gripping tightly, I can feel her nails digging in.
The world falls away as our lips meet in a fiery embrace, a collision of passion and longing that ignites every nerve ending in my body. Her kiss is intoxicating, a whirlwind of desire and need that sweeps me away in a tide of sensation.
I lose myself in the taste of her, the feel of her lips moving against mine with a hunger that mirrors my own. Our breath mingles in the space between us, hot and heavy with unspoken desire, as the intensity of our embrace grows with each passing moment.
Her hands are everywhere at once, trailing fire along my skin as she pulls me closer, her touch igniting a wildfire of sensation within me. I cling to her desperately, losing myself in the dizzying whirl of pleasure that consumes us both.
Time loses all meaning as we surrender to the passion that binds us together, lost in a world of our own making where nothing else matters but the fiery connection that burns between us.
And as we finally break apart, breathless and trembling, I find myself drowning in the depths of her gaze, a silent promise of more to come lingering in the air between us.
In that moment, I know that this is just the beginning of our journey together, a journey filled with love, passion, and endless possibility. And as we cling to each other in the aftermath of our shared passion, I can't help but feel a sense of gratitude for the unexpected twist of fate that brought us together.
User
"Bed. Now." Her eyes lit up red for a moment. My Wanda had never been dominate, but this Wanda before me exuded dominance. I didn't waste any time getting up the stairs with her hot on my tail as we crashed into the bedroom, stumbling to the bed in a heat of kisses as she took the leading role.
The air crackled with electricity as we stumbled into the bedroom, our lips locked in a frenzy of passion and desire. Wanda's presence was intoxicating, her aura radiating power and dominance in a way I had never experienced before. And as she took the lead, pushing me onto the bed with a hunger that sent shivers down my spine, I felt myself surrendering to the raw intensity of the moment.
Her kisses were demanding, igniting a fire within me that burned hotter with each passing second. I moaned against her lips, my fingers tangling in her hair as I lost myself in the heat of the moment. Her touch was electric, sending shockwaves of pleasure coursing through my body as she explored every inch of my skin with a hunger that left me breathless.
With each caress, each whispered word of desire, I felt myself falling deeper under her spell, my body responding eagerly to her every touch. And as she claimed me as her own, I surrendered to the overwhelming tide of sensation, losing myself in the ecstasy of our shared passion.
In that moment, there was only her, only us, lost in a world of pleasure and desire where nothing else mattered but the intoxicating connection that bound us together. And as we moved as one, bodies entwined in a symphony of passion, I knew that this was just the beginning of our journey together, a journey filled with love, lust, and endless possibility.
The sensation of relinquishing control, of surrendering completely to someone else's will, was both exhilarating and liberating. As I basked in the warmth of Wanda's dominance, I found myself embracing a side of myself that I had long suppressed, a side that craved the thrill of submission and surrender.
With each touch, each whispered command, I felt myself sinking deeper into the abyss of pleasure, my mind consumed by a haze of ecstasy that left me breathless and yearning for more. And as Wanda took the lead, guiding me with a firm yet gentle hand, I found myself surrendering to the overwhelming tide of sensation, losing myself in the intoxicating dance of pleasure and desire.
In her arms, I felt safe, cherished, and utterly alive, my body responding eagerly to her every touch and caress. And as we moved together in a symphony of passion and desire, I embraced the freedom that came with letting go, allowing myself to be swept away by the currents of our shared passion.
For in that moment, there was only her, only us, lost in a world of blissful surrender where nothing else mattered but the exquisite pleasure of our connection. And as we surrendered to the ecstasy of our shared desire, I knew that this was just the beginning of our journey together, a journey filled with exploration, discovery, and boundless pleasure.
"Ah...Wands..." A smack hit my thigh making me jolt and yelp.
"That's not my name Detka." I feel my stomach flip. I call her this all the time. I have for years now, but never in this setting. Another smack and then her teeth find my skin, biting and sucking harshly, marking me.
"Mommy!" I can feel the smirk against my thigh.
"Good girl. Go on. Show me how needy you are baby girl." Her fingers find themselves between my folds as I move my hips against them.
The sensation of her touch sent shivers of pleasure coursing through me, igniting a fire that burned hotter with each passing moment. I arched my back, pressing against her fingers as they explored the depths of my desire, teasing and tantalizing with a skill that left me trembling with need.
"Please," I whimpered, the word spilling from my lips in a desperate plea for more. Her touch was electric, sending shockwaves of pleasure coursing through my body as she pushed me to the brink of ecstasy.
With each caress, each stroke, I felt myself teetering on the edge of oblivion, my senses overwhelmed by the intensity of our shared passion. And as she whispered words of encouragement, urging me to let go and surrender to the pleasure that awaited, I felt myself surrendering completely to the overwhelming tide of sensation.
In that moment, there was only her, only us, lost in a world of blissful abandon where nothing else mattered but the exquisite pleasure of our connection. And as I succumbed to the ecstasy of our shared desire, I knew that this was just the beginning of our journey together, a journey filled with passion, intensity, and boundless pleasure.
The sensation of Wanda's magic enveloping my wrists sent a thrill of anticipation coursing through me, a tangible reminder of her power and dominance. I tested the restraints, feeling the firm hold of her magic as it kept me securely in place, my heart pounding with a mixture of excitement and arousal.
"Safe word. Green, yellow, red. Green is keep going, yellow slow down, red is stop." Wanda husked.
"Green, yellow, red," I echoed, committing the safe words to memory as a reassurance of our mutual trust and consent. With each breath, each whispered command, I felt myself sinking deeper into the heady haze of pleasure, surrendering completely to the overwhelming tide of sensation.
As Wanda continued to explore my body with a skillful touch that left me trembling with need, I surrendered myself to the ecstasy of our shared desire, knowing that in her arms, I was safe, cherished, and utterly alive.
And as the intensity of our passion grew with each passing moment, I found myself teetering on the edge of oblivion, my senses overwhelmed by the sheer intensity of our connection. In that moment, there was only her, only us, lost in a world of blissful abandon where nothing else mattered but the exquisite pleasure of our shared desire.
I don't think there is a place she hasn't marked on me in some way and after hours of edging until I couldn't form sentences she finally let me release. A string of moans ripping through me as the most intense waves roll over me as I drown in them, covered in sweat and her marks.
As the waves of pleasure washed over me, leaving me trembling and spent, I basked in the afterglow of our shared passion, my body still tingling with the echoes of our ecstasy. But just when I thought the intensity had peaked, I felt something pressing against my entrance, a sensation that sent a jolt of anticipation coursing through me.
I gasped, my body instinctively tensing as Wanda's touch ignited a new wave of desire within me. Her fingers teased and tantalized, exploring the depths of my desire with a skill that left me breathless and eager for more.
With each gentle thrust, I felt myself opening up to her, surrendering completely to the overwhelming tide of sensation. The pleasure was exquisite, a symphony of ecstasy that echoed through every fiber of my being as I lost myself in the blissful abandon of our shared desire.
And as Wanda continued to guide me with a firm yet gentle hand, I surrendered myself to the pleasure of our connection, knowing that in her arms, I was safe, cherished, and utterly alive. In that moment, there was only her, only us, lost in a world of blissful abandon where nothing else mattered but the exquisite pleasure of our shared desire.
Wanda soon enough needed more and so did I, "Faster...ha-ah...harder..." My breath hot against her, panting like a dog and that gave her the perfect opportunity to place her fingers in my mouth, gaging me with them, but I loved every second as I sucked on them, moaning against them as I tasted myself on them from earlier.
The sensation of Wanda's fingers in my mouth sent a thrill of arousal coursing through me, a heady mixture of pleasure and desire that left me panting and eager for more. With each thrust, each gasp of pleasure, I eagerly sucked on her fingers, tasting myself on them from earlier.
The taste was intoxicating, a symphony of desire that heightened the intensity of our connection as we moved together in perfect harmony. And as Wanda responded to my pleas with a fervor that mirrored my own, I surrendered myself to the pleasure of our shared desire, knowing that in her arms, I was safe, cherished, and utterly alive.
With each thrust, I felt myself teetering on the edge of oblivion, my senses overwhelmed by the sheer intensity of our passion. And as we reached the peak of ecstasy together, I knew that this was just the beginning of our journey, a journey filled with passion, intensity, and boundless pleasure.
In that moment, there was only her, only us, lost in a world of blissful abandon where nothing else mattered but the exquisite pleasure of our shared desire. And as we surrendered ourselves to the ecstasy of our connection, I knew that this was just the beginning of our journey together, a journey filled with love, lust, and endless possibility.
As I slowly regained my senses, the cool towel on the back of my neck and Wanda's comforting presence helped anchor me in reality. Her magic gently caressed my mind, offering reassurance and care as I took in the aftermath of our intense encounter.
"Easy, Detka. You're okay," she murmured, and I found solace in the warmth of her embrace. I took the offered water bottle, sipping slowly as she continued to tend to my well-being. The realization that I had passed out from pleasure left me both surprised and amused.
"Never happened before," I admitted with a chuckle. "The other Wanda was more of a sub, so I was usually the one in control. Not that I didn't enjoy it, but being on the receiving end is a whole different experience."
Wanda's magic fetched a baggy shirt, and as I recognized it, a wave of nostalgia washed over me. It was a shirt from a concert we attended when we were sixteen, a tangible link to our shared past.
"It's good to know not everything is different," I remarked, smiling as she kissed my temple.
In the warmth of our makeshift cocoon, surrounded by blankets and pillows, Wanda's magic weaving a protective barrier around us, we continued to watch 'Bob's Burgers.' However, my focus was no longer on the show; instead, I found myself captivated by the woman holding me close.
A sudden wave of fear and doubt crashed over me as I wondered if this intimate encounter was just a one-time gesture to alleviate my grief. The fear of being tossed aside after a momentary respite haunted my thoughts, threatening to overshadow the joy we had just shared.
Wanda, sensing my internal struggle, gently addressed my concerns. "Hey, woah, Detka. Those thoughts of yours are the farthest thing from the truth. Do not listen to them. I would never do that to my soulmate," she reassured me, her forehead finding mine in a tender gesture of connection.
"I love you, Y/N," she confessed, her words washing away my fears and opening the floodgates to a cascade of happy tears. "I love you, Wands! I didn't think I'd ever get to hear you say those words to me again," I admitted, clinging to her shirt as I sobbed into her.
Wanda's promises echoed in my heart, a vow to cherish and reaffirm our love every day. She kissed away my tears, each tender touch a testament to the depth of her commitment. "I promise I'm going to say it every chance I get. I'm never going to stop. I'm going to remind you every day how beautiful you are and how much I love you, and I promise I'm never going to leave. No missions. Nothing like that. I'll always be by your side," she declared, her own tears mingling with mine.
In that moment, as we drowned in each other's love, I knew that this second chance at happiness was a gift we would both cherish. And as Wanda whispered, "I love you," over and over, I felt the weight of my grief lifting, replaced by the warmth of a love that transcended time and space.
========
In the midst of my peaceful dream, I found myself enveloped in a sense of tranquility unlike any I had experienced in well over a year. Waking up with a smile on my face I turn my head, looking over I gazed upon the sleeping form of Wanda, her features softened by the gentle embrace of slumber, I felt a rush of overwhelming love and affection welling up within me.
With a playful smile tugging at the corners of my lips, I leaned in closer, pressing gentle kisses along the curve of her neck. Each tender touch elicited a soft moan from her lips, a melody of pleasure that echoed through the stillness of the night.
Lost in the intoxicating embrace of our shared intimacy, I continued to shower her with affection, reveling in the warmth of her presence and the depth of our connection. And as I whispered her name, a soft murmur of adoration, I knew that this moment, this fleeting glimpse of happiness, was a treasure to be cherished for all eternity.
As Wanda began to stir awake, her voice still heavy with sleep, I couldn't help but feel a surge of affection for her. Her words, though tinged with a hint of warning, only served to deepen the bond between us.
"You're playing a dangerous game, kotenok," she murmured, her voice laced with sleepiness.
"Shchenok," I corrected gently, a small smile playing on my lips.
Her eyes snapped open at the correction, surprise evident in her expression. "When did you learn that?" she asked, her curiosity piqued.
I shrugged, the memories of our shared past flooding back to me. "I was with her for like 20 years of our lives. I learned most Russian. Also Natasha, she..." My voice trailed off as Wanda's expression shifted, a wave of sadness washing over her.
"Oh my god, I forgot about Natasha. Is... is she alive here?" she asked, tears welling up in her eyes.
I nodded solemnly, feeling a pang of empathy for the pain she must be feeling. Crawling into her lap, I wrapped my arms around her, offering what comfort I could. "You really lost a lot there, dorogoya," I whispered, my voice soft with compassion. "But don't worry, everyone here is safe. We've apparently had it relatively easy here, it seems."
I pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead, my heart overflowing with love and gratitude for this woman who had endured so much. "Now you have your loved ones back. You aren't alone anymore, and you won't ever be again. I promise."
==============
As the weekend unfolded, Wanda and I remained entwined in each other's arms, our connection deepening with each passing moment. When the boys returned home with their uncle Pietro, the atmosphere was filled with warmth and affection, a tangible sense of family that enveloped us all.
Pietro's hug was tight, filled with an unspoken understanding that transcended words. In his whispered question, "Did you guys finally connect?" I detected a mixture of curiosity and genuine concern.
With a small nod and a soft "Mmhmm," I confirmed what he already knew. This Wanda wasn't his real sister, just as she wasn't the Wanda I had known and loved for decades. But she was here, she was special, and in her embrace, I found a sense of solace and belonging that I had thought lost forever.
==============
As the following Friday arrived, Wanda and I made the decision to gather our friends and family together to share the details of our new lives. It was a momentous occasion, filled with a mix of anticipation and apprehension as we prepared to unveil the truth about our extraordinary circumstances.
Gathering our loved ones in a familiar setting, we began to recount the events that had led us to this moment, explaining the complexities of our intertwined destinies and the newfound connections we had forged. With each word, we sought to convey the depth of our emotions, the challenges we had overcome, and the hope that now burned bright within our hearts.
As our gathering unfolded, the emotions in the room were palpable, each hug and embrace a testament to the depth of our shared experiences and the bonds that bound us together.
Wanda's first instinct was to embrace Natasha tightly, their bodies trembling with sobs as they clung to each other. For both of them, it was a moment of overwhelming relief and joy, the realization that they had been given a second chance to be reunited with someone they had feared lost forever.
Next was Clint, the stalwart friend and ally who had saved Wanda countless times in her timeline, offering comfort and support when she needed it most. As they embraced, the weight of their shared history hung heavy in the air, a reminder of the trials they had faced and the strength they had found in each other's presence.
In that moment, surrounded by friends and family who had become like kin, Wanda and I felt a profound sense of gratitude for the bonds that had been forged through adversity. And as we shared stories and memories, laughter mingling with tears, we knew that no matter what challenges lay ahead, we would face them together, drawing strength from the love and support that surrounded us.
As our friends and family listened intently, their expressions shifting from surprise to understanding, we felt a sense of relief wash over us. To have our loved ones by our side, supporting us through this journey, was a gift beyond measure.
And as we concluded our explanation, surrounded by the warmth and love of those closest to us, we knew that no matter what the future held, we would face it together, united in our shared bond and unwavering commitment to one another.
As the night wore on and the festivities continued, Stephen pulled me aside, his expression grave with concern. "You know what she's done in her universe, right?" he asked, his voice tinged with urgency.
I bristled at his question, feeling a surge of defensiveness rise within me. "Do not start this, Strange," I warned, jabbing a finger in his direction. "If I had gone through what she had, this universe wouldn't even exist. What she did, in my eyes, is child's play compared to the horrors she endured."
My words carried a weight of conviction, a steadfast belief in Wanda's resilience and the sacrifices she had made to protect those she loved. And as I met Stephen's gaze, I saw a flicker of understanding in his eyes, a silent acknowledgment of the depth of Wanda's strength and the magnitude of her courage.
"She threw a tantrum essentially. Took over a town for a bit and then went on a killing spree to get here. I saw it through her eyes. I know if it had been me, you'd be lucky if America had still been standing," I asserted, a hint of steel in my voice as I tapped the power stone embedded in my chest.
The reminder of the immense power at my disposal served as both a warning and a declaration. Wanda's actions in her universe were a testament to the depths of her grief and the consequences of unchecked power. In contrast, I recognized the responsibility that came with wielding such force, a responsibility I vowed to use wisely to protect those I loved.
As the weight of our conversation lingered, Stephen nodded in acknowledgment, a silent understanding passing between us. The night continued, but the specter of the past and the potential for the future hung in the air, a reminder that even in moments of celebration, the shadows of our pasts were never truly far behind.
"I don't think you understand, my strength isn't superhuman, it's otherworldly. The precision it requires to ensure I don't break everything around me at any given moment is a delicate balance. With one punch, I wouldn't just put a crater in the earth, I'd break it in half," I emphasized, underscoring the magnitude of the power I possessed.
The distinction between superhuman strength and the cosmic force I wielded was crucial to grasp. While others might possess extraordinary abilities, mine was on a different scale altogether, capable of reshaping the very fabric of reality itself. It was a responsibility that weighed heavily on me, requiring a level of control and restraint beyond what most could comprehend.
As I spoke, I could sense the gravity of my words sinking in, the realization dawning on Stephen of the immense power at my command. It was a sobering reminder of the delicate balance between strength and responsibility, a balance that I vowed to uphold no matter the cost.
"I'm sorry, Y/N, I just wanted to remind you-" Stephen began, but I swiftly cut him off, my tone firm yet understanding. "Don't, Stephen. I know you're just trying to help. I don't need the reminder though," I assured him, acknowledging his concern while asserting my own understanding of the situation.
With a nod of acceptance, Stephen backed off, respecting my boundaries and allowing me to return to the comforting embrace of Wanda, who had been engaged in conversation with Natasha and Clint. As I settled back into her arms, the warmth of her presence enveloped me, a reassuring reminder of the love and support that surrounded me.
In that moment, surrounded by friends and family, I felt a sense of peace wash over me, a quiet reassurance that no matter the challenges we faced, we would face them together, united in our shared bonds and unwavering commitment to one another.
As Wanda continued her conversation with Natasha and Clint, her fingers traced delicate patterns on my hip, their touch a gentle caress that spoke volumes of the journey she had undertaken. Once stained with blood, those same hands now exuded a tenderness and compassion that belied the darkness of the past.
Feeling the soothing rhythm of her touch, I couldn't help but marvel at the transformation Wanda had undergone, the evolution from a place of pain and turmoil to one of healing and redemption. It was a testament to her resilience and strength, a reminder that even in the face of adversity, it was possible to find light amidst the shadows.
In that moment, as her touch danced across my skin, I felt a profound sense of gratitude for the woman before me, for the love and forgiveness she had extended, and for the hope that now blossomed within our hearts. And as our conversation continued, I knew that no matter what trials lay ahead, we would face them together, bound by the unbreakable bond of love and understanding that had brought us to this moment.
As the room suddenly filled with the energetic presence of our children, along with Clint's youngest and Kate close behind, my boys bounded into mine and Wanda's arms with cries for help. "Moms! Save us from the monster!" they pleaded, their laughter filling the air.
I chuckled as I gathered them close, feeling their warmth and energy envelop me in a comforting embrace. Glancing over, I caught sight of Kate playfully tickling Nathaniel, the mischievous grin on her face confirming my suspicions.
With a smile, I joined Wanda in rescuing our boys from the clutches of the imaginary monster, enveloping them in hugs and laughter as we reveled in the joy of family and friendship. In that moment, surrounded by the ones we loved most, I couldn't help but feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude for the blessings that filled our lives, each smile and laugh a reminder of the happiness that awaited us in the days to come.
As the boys began to drift off to sleep in my arms, I couldn't help but smile at the sight. "I think it's time to go, my love," I murmured to Wanda, gesturing towards our sleeping sons. Despite their ten years, I scooped them up effortlessly, their weight feeling light in my arms.
A momentary look of surprise flickered across Wanda's face, her gaze lingering on me as she seemed to momentarily forget about my strength. At just 4'11, I was indeed petite for someone with such power, a fact that often caught others off guard.
With a soft chuckle, I gently adjusted the boys in my arms, their peaceful expressions a testament to the love and security they felt in our embrace. As we prepared to leave, I felt a surge of gratitude for the family we had become, bound together by love and the unbreakable bond of kinship. With Wanda by my side, I knew that no matter what challenges lay ahead, we would face them together, united in our shared love and determination to protect those we held dear.
As I glanced over at Wanda, watching the tender expression on her face as she looked upon our sleeping sons, my heart swelled with love and gratitude. The depth of emotion reflected in her eyes filled me with a sense of warmth and contentment, knowing that our family was complete and our bond unbreakable.
In that moment, as we stood together, surrounded by the quiet stillness of the night, I felt a profound sense of peace wash over me. The love that radiated between us and enveloped our children was a testament to the strength of our connection, a bond forged in the fires of adversity and tempered by the trials we had faced together.
As we prepared to depart, I reached out to take Wanda's hand, intertwining our fingers in a silent gesture of unity and love. With a shared smile, we turned and made our way home, our hearts full and our spirits lifted by the knowledge that no matter what challenges lay ahead, we would face them together, as a family.
===========
Wanda and I are on the couch when she asks, "Do you have photo albums of the boys?" I look at her, peeling my eyes from the TV as I pause it.
"Of course." I get up grabbing several albums of almost everything of their lives. "After we left the Avengers I took solace in capturing moments so we have a lot." I tell her as she starts through her pregnancy photos one of every month. Then the hospital photos of her giving birth. The look of pure happiness and bliss on both our faces as we held the boys. Both of us having skin to skin contact with them. As Wanda goes through the albums she starts crying.
"I missed out on so much because of my magic..." she whispered solemnly. "They went from babies, to 5, to 10 all because of words I said...Y/N...I missed everything." Knowing that Wanda had used her magic to create our boys in her universe and not anything like how we had here made her incredibly sad. I hate seeing her like this.
"How about I show you. Their first words, their first steps, everything." With a gentle touch, I leaned in closer to her, resting my forehead against hers as I offered her a silent gesture of comfort and solidarity. Feeling her fingers against my temples, I closed my eyes and allowed the memories to flow, every precious moment from the joyous announcement of her pregnancy to the bittersweet final days we shared together playing out before her.
As the memories unfolded like a vivid tapestry, I watched as Wanda's tears began to subside, replaced by a sense of wonder and awe. Through the magic of our shared recollections, she was able to witness the milestones she had missed, the laughter and love that had filled our home in her absence.
In that moment, as we shared in the memories of our past, I felt a renewed sense of hope blossom within me. Though Wanda may have missed out on so much, I was determined to make every moment from this point forward count, to cherish the time we had together and to create new memories that would fill the void left by the past.
With a gentle smile, I wrapped my arms around her, holding her close as we basked in the warmth of our shared love. And as the echoes of our memories faded into the night, I knew that no matter what trials lay ahead, we would face them together, united in our unwavering commitment to one another and to our family.
As I looked into Wanda's eyes, feeling the weight of her sadness and longing, I knew that I had to do everything in my power to ease her pain and make up for the lost time. With a gentle touch, I cupped her cheek in my hand, my thumb brushing away the tears that lingered there.
"Everything with them feels too quick and also a lifetime," I whispered softly, my heart swelling with love and determination. "But now that you're here with us, you'll get to experience it all with me. Together."
In that moment, as we shared in our shared resolve to embrace the present and forge ahead as a family, I felt a sense of peace wash over me. No matter what challenges lay ahead, we would face them together, united in our love and commitment to one another.
With a tender smile, I leaned in to press a gentle kiss against Wanda's forehead, silently promising to cherish every moment we shared and to make up for the lost time in any way I could. Together, we would build a future filled with love, laughter, and endless memories, united in our bond as a family.
Once we put the albums away, shut the TV off for the night we headed upstairs. Stopping to look in at the boys sleeping peacefully before heading to our own room, getting ourselves ready for bed. As I climb in, stretching out, Wanda climbs on top of me. I bite my bottom lip, looking up at her. I can see the look she has. I wrap my arms around her neck, gently trying to pull her down. She doesn't budge.
"Did you want something, shchenok?" Between the look in her eyes, the sound of her voice, and her in just a tank top of sleep shorts I'm weak to her completely under her not just physically.
"Want you. Need you." I tell her trying again to pull and when she still doesn't budge. I pout and whine. "Wands...please.."
As Wanda's hands worked their magic, binding mine above my head with a delicate yet firm touch, I felt a rush of excitement and anticipation coursing through me. With each tug of her magic, I was rendered powerless, completely at her mercy as she explored my body with a hunger that ignited a fire within me.
"Behave and we'll see where it goes," she husked, her words sending shivers down my spine as she pushed up my shirt, her lips finding purchase on my chest with an intensity that left me breathless. The sensation of her teeth grazing my skin, her tongue tracing patterns across my flesh, sent waves of pleasure radiating through me, making me squirm and writhe beneath her touch.
As I felt myself slipping deeper into subspace, surrendering to the heady mix of pleasure and vulnerability, I couldn't help but lose myself in the moment, giving in completely to the sensations that engulfed me. With each kiss, each caress, I felt myself unraveling, consumed by the overwhelming desire that burned between us.
In that moment, as I surrendered myself to Wanda's tender ministrations, I felt a profound sense of connection and intimacy that transcended the physical realm. With her by my side, I knew that I was safe, cherished, and loved beyond measure, and as I surrendered to the ecstasy of the moment, I knew that our bond would only grow stronger with each passing day.
Wanda plays with me and teases me for hours and I can't even remember how many times she's pushed me over the edge of ecstasy. As she brought me to another one as she slammed into me with a magic strap-on she'd conjured up, my mind already drowning in subspace, barely able to form words, but one slips out and then a few more,
"Mommy...gonna...ah-ha...ah..." After my words she sped up leaning down to whisper in my ear,
"That's right cum for Mommy like a good girl. Mommy's gonna cum with you. Gonna fill you up and breed you baby girl." As she whispered those final words in my ear, her voice a husky growl of lust and desire, I felt myself shattering into a million pieces, my entire being consumed by the ecstasy of release. With a cry of pure ecstasy, I let myself fall over the edge, my body trembling with the force of my climax as I surrendered myself entirely to the pleasure that engulfed me. Feeling her fill me up completely made my eyes roll back and the only word I could comprehend was, “Mommy.”
In that moment, as I basked in the afterglow of our shared ecstasy, I knew that I was exactly where I belonged, wrapped in the arms of the woman I loved more than anything in the world.
Taglist: @dorabledewdroop
#ley writes#wanda maximoff#wanda maximoff x reader#wanda x reader#wanda maximoff smut#wanda x you#wanda x y/n#wanda maxmoff x y/n#wanda maximommy#wanda maximoff x fem!reader#wanda maximoff x female reader#the scarlet witch x fem!reader#the scarlet witch#scarlet witch x you#scarlet witch x reader#scarlet witch
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