Tumgik
#autism in girls
my-autism-adhd-blog · 5 months
Text
Internal Experiences of Autism
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
The Autistic Teacher
412 notes · View notes
tdaspoetry · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media
“you’ve always been more of a dog person” by t. das
1K notes · View notes
miakate-writes · 2 months
Text
hiiii, was just wondering if anyone has any tips for unmasking autism?
158 notes · View notes
for this disability pride month, i want to highlight a couple of things with autism and ahdhd, particularly in girls.
if your teen girl is staying up every single night until 3 am doing homework, and she's been at it since 230 pm when she got home from school... that needs to be acknowledged and addressed. thats not normal, even the insane amounts of schoolwork that a white rich school would require for students in those college level courses wouldnt require almost 12 hours of studying a night. especially if her grades don't reflect that level of attention.
if your teen girl forgets things constantly, if she makes mistakes in sending the right documents or doesnt buy what you tell her to at the store, she is not lazy, stupid or malicious. these are symptoms that need to be acknowledged and addressed, this is not normal brain behavior. there is something going on cognitively.
if your teen girl is amazing and lovely until she's explosively angry, she's not an evil person hellbent on ruining the family. this is emotional disregulation, she needs help. these are symptons that need to be acknowledged and addressed.
if your teen girl is talkative and likes being around you until she doesnt, and if she goes silent until she's allowed to go to her room and sleep off the grumpiness, she's not being hateful towards you. she is likely burnt-out socializing and needs to gain her energy back, let her be. this is a symptom that needs to be addressed and acknowledged.
if your daughter constantly needs to chew on gum, even after you berate and shame her for doing so, to the point where her jaw often hurts, this is not her being defiant. this is a symptom and needs to be addressed and acknowledged.
if your daughter walks funny, laughs funny, dances weird, cries too much at commercials that are overly dramatic, and you make her feel bad for displaying any of these traits, you're harming her. let her exist in this world without feeling the need to box in her behavior into "acceptable" mannerisms. unlearn what it means to walk, laugh, dance "funny" and examine why you feel the need to bully people who don't behave in ways you've approved beforehand.
if your daughter has had trouble making friends her entire life and if you often catch her talking to herself in rehearsing full on conversations, she is most likely exhibiting symptoms of autism and these need to be acknowledged and addressed.
if your daughter learned to do things early on and had an extensive vocabulary or skipped the crawling stage and walked immediately, or if your daughter never learned how to "play properly" i.e. she loved having toys but only to organize and line them up and refused to let anyone else touch them, your daughter is exhibiting symptoms of autism that need to be acknowledged and addressed.
if your daughter often refuses to acknowledge her tone or states that "i didnt say it like that" "i didnt say that" or "thats not what i meant" and if she repeatedly tells you "i dont understand what tone you're talking about" she is not gaslighting or manipulating you. she is not being stubborn, she is not lying. she is exhibiting signs of autism that need to be acknowledged and addressed.
if your daughter only likes to eat certain things, to the point that it affects her health, she is not a picky eater. this is a symptom that must be acknowledged and addressed.
if your daughter is black and white in her thinking, to the point where she will argue with you about things that she thinks are objectively unfair or wrong to her, she is not doing it out of spite. she is exhibiting symptoms that must be addressed and acknowledged.
if your daughter loses her shit at not being allowed to sleep in on the weekends, especially if you know she's been pulling 12 hour "study sessions" all week, she is not being spoiled and ungrateful. she is exhibiting signs of autism/adhd burn out and she biologically needs to sleep more than other people to begin with, let alone in the situation that she is currently in.
please stop demonizing the behavior of your teenage daughters and start looking at each individual situation as pieces to a larger puzzle. if your daughter shows a majority of these signs, please start looking at these behaviors as manifestions of the symptoms that are distressing your child in that moment.
autism in girls is often treated as "bad behavior" that parents often try to "discipline" out instead of symptomatic behavior of a disorder that has gone unmanaged and unaccomodated for probably over a decade and half at that point. please treat your daughters with respect, love and dignity even in their worst times because that is when they need the most.
it doesn't help when you demonize your child as being purposely spiteful and hateful towards you, especially if you feel like you've communicated with them sufficiently and they aren't listening or compromising with you at the very least, because your children *do not* want to hurt you. your children are begging to be heard and you refuse to help them.
please research autism and adhd, especially how it can differ in girls versus boys, and please start treating your teenage girls with more love, kindness, and empathy.
563 notes · View notes
ineedfairypee · 10 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Aww she's shy 🙈
288 notes · View notes
nothing0fnothing · 8 months
Text
I used to get picked on as a kid because my favourite place to shop for clothes was notorious for being where all the old ladies bought their clothes. I liked it because everything they sold was really basic so I knew everything I bought from there would go with everything else I had so I didn't have to worry about working out if something was an outfit or not every time I got dressed.
I didn't understand why the other kids didn't like them bc their stuff was so soft and comfortable and the materials were really natural and breathable and all the seams were really nicely crafted so they weren't noticeable when you were wearing them..
Autism.. that was autism.
174 notes · View notes
a-secret-inner-life · 4 months
Text
I came across a lot of stuff that I could relate to about autism while researching for a paper, which led me to do more research on autism in general. I saw some other people doing this type of post on here, so: autistic people, can you please read my super long and detailed list of possible symptoms I experience and tell me if it seems like I'm one of you? I'm trying to be objective and reasonable and figure out what's going on with myself here.
Sensory Stuff
I like to stim–bouncing my legs, tapping my feet when I sit, occasionally swinging my legs or rocking. I also clench my fists or sit on my hands a lot and tap my fingers on things, or just fiddle with whatever is in front of me. Recently, I count while touching my thumb to each of my fingertips to calm down because someone in a book I read did that and it actually does help me. I also sing the alphabet song repeatedly when I'm working on my website.
Sometimes when I'm very tired or overwhelmed my face feels itchy and I feel like every strand of hair touching me prickles and itches and leaves a red spot (but it doesn't actually).
I have a strong hatred for perfume because it smells too strong and fakey, and citrus scents also drive me nuts, but I really like scented candles.
I'm a super picky eater, although I'm not as bad as when I was a kid. I don't mind the taste of tomatoes, peppers, or onions in things, but I'm still a little grossed out when I know I'm eating them, and the texture of onions freaks me right out, as an example.
I get startled easily. Loud noises don't actually scare me, they just jolt me out of whatever thought space I was in before I heard them.
I also get overwhelmed whenever someone tries to talk to me in a loud car (whether it's loud with other people or just the engine), and I find it overwhelming and incredibly difficult to concentrate when more than one person is talking at once. Whenever I'm in a crowd, it just sounds like this vague roar that gets louder the more I think about it, which can sometimes be overwhelming. Still, I'm good at tuning some things out in select circumstances, like the TV when it's on.
Finally, if I pay attention at pretty much any time when there isn't a ton of other noise, I can hear ringing in my ears. This isn't usually upsetting, and I know it's fairly common for anyone to get tinnitus from time to time, but I'm not sure if most people experience it this much.
Social Stuff
I can not handle eye contact.
I'm also really, really, comically bad at social interactions. I almost never speak to someone I don't know well before they speak to me, and my go-to conversation method is to laugh/giggle and nod, I literally can not make actual conversation to save my life. Sometimes I think of things to say but it doesn't occur to me to say them, or I try to but I'm scared and can't find an opening, or I do say the thing and people don't react the way I want them to (usually it's either confusion or disinterest).
Old ladies are my favorite people because they're the least scary somehow. I also love kids, but I'm still awkward so I rarely interact and probably still freak them out.
I'm horrible at keeping contact and I wait until I know people are offline to reply to their messages because conversation is stressful and I need time to think when I text. Group chats are a nightmare, so I pretty much ghost everyone when I'm in one.
I'm super attached to my family, though. I make an effort to create a deep bond with each of my siblings, and I'm the clingiest person in the world when it comes to my older sister.
I value people very deeply, which might be why I find them so intimidating. I love them and I want them to be happy, and I put too much pressure on the situation.
I used to hate being alone, and I still feel guilty or sad whenever I spend too much time by myself, although I actually love to be by myself, a lot of my hobbies and favorite places are solitary, and I usually prefer figuring things out on my own rather than having somebody right there trying to figure it out with me.
I'm incredibly empathetic. It's not like I can automatically sense people's emotions, but I do make an effort to pay attention and understand what they're feeling and why they feel that way. My siblings come and rant to me a lot, and I can be a good diplomat and see both points of view when they argue. I also care, and I always want to make people feel better, though it obviously doesn't always work. Sometimes I'm too empathetic, or maybe too creative, and I stress out about what someone might be feeling when I don't know if it's an actual issue or not.
Patterns and Stuff
I've always been good at remembering my parents’ phone numbers and our zip code, as well as my friends’ birthdays. I work at a grocery store where I find myself reciting the regular customers’ lottery numbers in my head as they're saying them to me.
My dad used to have a verbal checklist of what to bring to work each morning, and I still recite it every time I hear the words “wallet” and “keys” next to each other. Same goes for my old morning checklist that I don't even follow anymore.
I don't adhere to a strict routine in terms of the general structure of my day, but I definitely have a system or pattern for a lot of my specific activities.
Emotional Stuff
I've been obsessed with drawing and painting for as long as I can remember. I write all the time. I think I dedicated myself and a huge chunk of my life to my hobbies. If I like something, I like to think that I make it my own, and that thing permeates who I am.
When I first started listening to BTS, I scoured literally the entire Internet to find every possible hidden track any of the members ever touched, and there were A LOT. Lately I've been obsessed with Keeper of the Lost Cities, and I can't stop talking about the books. I'm also hyper fixated on Tomorrow X Together.
When I start something, I need to finish it, and I'll often think I'm so close to being done only to continue on it for several more hours, trying to hurry up and finish because I need to get it done now. I'm also pretty bad at switching tasks. I try to multitask, but it doesn't really work out.
I can easily forget about my own physical needs; particularly I don't usually realize when I'm hungry. Overall my needs are very flexible to the people around me; if you want to eat together, suddenly I'm hungry, if you don't feel like stopping, neither do I.
I'm a perfectionist, but I hate asking for help. This is especially true when it comes to my grades and my hobbies. I'm more comfortable when I can control the variables and nobody has to know if I fail.
I'm pretty sure I have executive dysfunction because I put so much pressure on doing things perfectly that I lose the motivation to do them at all, and as much as I need to get something done, I can't make myself do it.
Since I was little I've always been awkward and out of place. I feel like I take up too much space. Honestly, I feel like my existence is lame and embarrassing. I hate myself.
I absolutely suck at decision making, sometimes because I don't want to choose something that other people won't like and partially because I'm just really indecisive. Often I feel stuck or paralyzed because I can't choose one way or another.
Along those same lines, the responsibility of being told to do something for someone else is terrible, and I hate doing these things without incredibly specific instructions because I'm scared of messing up.
I also need to know exact details of whatever activity I'm doing before I do it, and I hate when something big isn't planned out in detail.
I used to have a lot of meltdowns as a child. I’d yell and cry and throw things when I was upset. This still happens sometimes, but not as frequently or as badly.
I feel guilty about everything, including mistakes from years ago that shouldn't matter anymore. This makes me feel sort of unworthy (?), like anything good I do is the bare minimum and if I cause a problem (through anxiety or executive dysfunction) that messes up a project, I feel like I have to do everything else perfectly to make up for it, although I usually end up feeling like I'm coddling myself instead.
I constantly compare myself to others. If someone else has a problem that's worse than what I deal with, I feel like I'm not allowed to have my own negative feelings.
I feel like none of my feelings are valid. I feel and think all sorts of dramatic things that seem like the end of the world, but compared to others, my problems are small, and I feel stupid for having them. I almost wish I had a bigger issue or more dangerous mental problems that would make my responses more reasonable, but my logical side knows that this thinking is wrong.
I've been dealing with off and on burnout since I was around twelve years old (so about five years). I've been told over and over that my mindset is wrong and I need to do a million things better mentally to be less of a perfectionist, but I don't have the energy to put in any effort whatsoever to fix myself. I still get random bursts of motivation that last for short periods of time, though.
Sometimes when I go to bed after a stressful day, I wake up in the morning and I have this uncontrollable dread about starting my day. The thought of getting up sounds impossible, and it's almost like there's something sitting in my chest keeping me down.
96 notes · View notes
ambientbroth · 2 years
Text
Gatekeeping culture is like: “don’t get your information online it’s too easy😡!!!” Then offer “find research papers online it’s really easy🙄”
Then block you.
Self diagnosing isn’t TikTok videos and random blogs. It’s literally months to years of research. There’s a lot of reasons why someone can’t get professionally diagnosed.
Misdiagnoses happen a lot
People aren’t taken seriously
It’s expensive asf
Its inaccessible
People want to adopt
People want the right to their bodily autonomy
I’m disappointed when I go online and see my bullies are now nurses. That’s kinda the same thing when I go on here and see professionally diagnosed people who shit on undiagnosed for posting coping mechanisms.
Stop calling people “the problem” for coping. The real issue is people who post any “if you have these… you might have” THATS DANGEROUS. what isn’t dangerous is:
Finding coping mechanisms
Find organization tools to function
Therapy
Talking about experiences
Researching extensively on traits
Documenting
Unmasking
Printing off quizzes or research articles from well established resources (Embracing Autism, ASAN, AIM, awn network, A4A)
Stimming (if it isn’t harming)
Advocating for diagnosis is one thing. Being a bully online is another. It’s a disability not a quirk, a lot of self diagnosed people know it’s a disability. We can identify the actual problems in the self diagnosing community but a lot of us aren’t those.
We’re valid
626 notes · View notes
fionaappleenjoyer · 5 months
Text
Tumblr media
I’ve never heard someone sum up my experience so well, Strong Female Character by Fern Brady is genuinely the best written memoir I’ve ever read, definitely recommend if you’re an autistic girl/woman.
44 notes · View notes
Text
My niece (in a family chalk full of neurodivergencies) is two and keeps absolutely losing it (meltdown perhaps) when she’s forced into transitions with little to no warning (understandable bc girl same) and my brother (her conservative catholic-convert father) keeps trying to comfort her by hugging her and saying things like “ohh you’re fine, nothing actually bad is happening to you, you’re just my little drama queen aren’t you” and holy fuck I can’t even type these out without my face twisting up
Anyway it’s not my place to step in and even if it were I’m the most ridiculously PDA asocial non-confrontational kind of autistic there is so I don’t even know if I’m psychologically capable anyway.
But still, adults treating me like that as a kid had me believing it was okay and good so adults kept treating me that way well into my adulthood so I didn’t understand until mid twenties that nobody should be treated that way, I’m not “just a drama queen,” my very real and valid problems have just been dismissed my whole life.
I do not want this to happen to her.
14 notes · View notes
freezeyourbrain · 7 months
Text
yes i have autism! how could you tell ?
Tumblr media Tumblr media
23 notes · View notes
my-autism-adhd-blog · 17 days
Text
Internal Experiences of Autism
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
The Autistic Teacher
164 notes · View notes
Text
Autism in Women/Girls
Trying to help more people see this! Autism is really underdiagnosed in women and girls- with about 80% of women being undiagnosed at age 18. The ratio of boys to girls being diagnosed with it is 4:1- with some people believing that the real ratio is even lower. This is because historically research about this was centered around boys- so we know a lot about what it looks like in young boys, but not so much... adult women.
The result is that a lot of women/girls with autism also end up having comorbidities like eating disorders, anxiety, and depression due to the bullying and loneliness .
This might be a helpful graphic if you're curious about what this can look like in girls- there's also this list of traits that I thought was really helpful as well.
Tumblr media
9 notes · View notes
miakate-writes · 23 days
Text
one misconception about autistic people that i HATE is that none of us can function on our own. we don’t all need a carer!
have u heard of high-functioning before? no, u haven’t, because the media only portrays autistic people who don’t mask and who need and receive tonnes of support
autism doesn’t look the same for anyone, that’s why it’s a SPECTRUM
19 notes · View notes
poufwore · 10 months
Text
this is so reassuring to watch a show that portrays an (imo) autistic coded character and encourages them to unmask
Tumblr media Tumblr media
30 notes · View notes
ineedfairypee · 10 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Is it? Are you sure?
52 notes · View notes