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#as well. leaving home. leaving everyone here. moving. being in an apartment again. it’s going to be like college where i’ll be back home on
andwewerehappy · 7 months
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had the big cry about them tonight. mostly him. keep daring the universe to prove me wrong when i say i’ll never see him again.
#i’ve been pathetic my whole life but i do think this is a new low for me.#he’s a 23yr old man with a girlfriend who works at a truck wash. like girl get a grip#but what if he was my soulmate :( in another universe he calls me up tonight and tells me he loves me too.#GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD. and for what. for WHAT !!!! this really is one of those times where i wish i could zoom out and see the big picture#and see what this all was FOR. like what was the POINT of the last 8 months. this heartbreak this frustration this anxiety. for WHAT !!!#what if i never get over you.mp3 😐 what if i never get over. what if i never get closure. what if i never get back all the wasted words#i told you. what if it never gets better. what if this lasts forever and ever. i’m TRYING but then i close my eyes and i’m right back !!!#lost in that last goodbye !!! what if time doesn’t do what it’s supposed to do !!! what if i never get over you !!!#also i’m sure this is not All about him. it’s just manifesting as abt him right now. it will also be about Leaving in the bigger sense#as well. leaving home. leaving everyone here. moving. being in an apartment again. it’s going to be like college where i’ll be back home on#the weekends but. this also feels different. more permanent. keep telling myself it’s only a year. if i still feel like this after a year#i won’t stay. i’ll come back home. give it a try and see what happens.#this is not really leaving. this is not one of those things when you leave and you can never go back. this is not that.#and to think i thought i could up and move to seattle. god i’m such a joke.
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pixystixx · 6 months
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You Should Date!
I APOLOGIZE TO WHOEVER REQUESTED!! Something got completely screwed up when i went to post!! I'm also sorry for now posting for forevs xx I'm back now and I wrote some more :)
Resquest: Hi! Could you write a colby brock x chubby reader fic where they have crushes on each other but don't know it? Maybe they're doing a video where they react to comments but a lot of them are about the two of them and how they should date because they're either always flirting with each other or Colby is super protective of her. 
colbybrock x f!reader
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Summary: You've been friends with Colby for quite awhile. You guys are at one of his parties, but he wants you to stay after and film a video. When you guys film the video all of the questions are about you two flirting and Colby being different towards you. (843 words)
Warnings: some dude being kinda gross to the reader
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You’ve been at Colby’s party for a while, but it’s beginning to die down now. People you don’t know very well are starting to leave his apartment. You’re sitting on a couch next to Colby and a couple of his friends.
“Well, I’m gonna head out! See you guys later,” a brunette girl calls out, getting off the couch.
“See you,” Colby replies with a tiny wave. It’s only 5 p.m., but you feel like it’s your time to leave.
“Hey, Colby,” you say, leaning closer to Colby, “I’m thinking of heading out.” Colby’s eyes immediately dart to meet yours, and he looks at you with his eyes wide. He plants his teeth on his lower lip softly—a gesture you’ve learned over years of knowing him, meaning he wants to say something. “What? You have that look on your face,” you ask.
“Can you stay?” Colby asks quietly, making sure no one else can hear him. His question makes your heart flutter in your chest. You cannot handle being alone with Colby right now, so you open your mouth to say no. You’re quickly cut off by Colby saying, “Y/N, please. I wanna film a video.”
You sigh, knowing Colby will get whatever he wants out of you. Your only soft spot is one for Colby. “Fine, but this party better be out of here soon,” you answer. Colby smirks slightly and gets up from the couch.
You sit quietly, hoping not to be disturbed, but another guy you don’t know sits on your right. He smells of cigarettes and cedar and has an edgy appearance. “Hey, pretty,” he says, winking at you. His presence makes you uncomfortable, so you flash him a small smile. He suddenly puts his hand on your thigh and squeezes.
“Can you not,” you growl, moving his hand off your thigh. He goes to put back on your thigh with a scowl on his face.
“Get off of her!” Colby yells, dropping a drink on the floor. Colby grabs the guy by his collar and pushes him towards the door. “Get out! And never talk to her or me again!” he shouts, his fists bunched at his sides.
The whole apartment goes silent, and everyone stares at Colby and you. You clear your throat and whisper, “Can you tell them to go home?” Colby’s angry expression quickly softens, and he nods.
“Sorry for the disturbance, guys. Party’s over,” Colby announces, pointing to the door. Everyone shuffles out, which leaves you two alone.
~
After calming down, you and Colby started filming a video answering the fan’s questions about you two. “Hey guys! I’m here with Y/N, and we’re answering some of y’all’s questions!” Colby says into the camera, “Okay, first one! What are your favorite movies?”
“Ooh! Mine’s definitely Scream. It’s just such a classic!” you exclaim, smiling widely. While you talk, Colby looks at you with the cutest face, a slight smirk, and soft eyes. You feel your cheeks go red and try to cover it by shyly running your tongue along your teeth.
“What was that one we watched last week?” Colby asks. He looks at you patiently while you think. “Wait, I remember! The Shining.” You nod, and Colby looks back at his phone. “Next one,” he mumbles, “Why are two always flirting?”
Your face turns red, and you nervously burst into laughter. “What? We do not!” you laugh. Colby chuckles a few times and fixes his hair.
“Yeah, totally,” Colby says quietly. You guys sit there in silence for a few beats. Colby inhales awkwardly and clears his throat. Suddenly, there’s an abnormal amount of tension between you two.
“Let me pick a question,” you mutter, taking his phone. His skin brushes against you softly, sending warm signals through your body. You pick a random question. “This one says.., this isn’t a question, but you should date,” you breathe out.
Colby laughs awkwardly and says, “All of you guys keep saying that!” He looks at you when he says the next part of his sentence, “Maybe we just need to test it sometime.” You giggle uncomfortably, and he frantically adds, “Just joking!”
You guys laugh, and you sigh before reading another question, “What happened at the party? Colby almost punched that dude. He’s so protective of Y/N.”
You have chosen to forget about the party, so the question annoys you. Despite your annoyance, you answer, “Some asshole laid hands on me.”
“Yeah, and I almost punched him. If anyone tries something with Y/N, they have it coming,” Colby explains. He leans over to hug you, but his chair tips over, and he falls onto the floor. The loud noise breaks the tension, and you burst out laughing, practically in tears.
“Oh my god, Colby, you dumbass!” you yell while laughing.
You guys finish the video, answering a bunch of other questions. You leave Colby’s house with a smile plastered to your face. Your crush on him is really getting worse day by day. You really wanna know if he likes you back. (Spoiler: he does.)
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bonny-kookoo · 3 months
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Taehyung/Jungkook
Crowded | Drabble #1
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In which you're gone on heat-leave, and Jungkook is grumpy about it.
Tags/Warnings: Wolf!Jungkook, Tiger!Taehyung, Fox!Reader, Mutual (secret) pining, romance, fluff, slight angst, mention of heat but everything's SFW
-> Masterlist
♥━━━━━━━━━━•.♡.•━━━━━━━━━━━━♥
“Wait, where’s-” Jungkook asks, only finding Taehyung on the couch of their shared apartment.  
“She left this morning for her hotel stay.” The tiger hybrid replies, watching how Jungkook’s wolf tail slowly lowers down, falling limp behind him as he shows his disappointment.  
“Oh.” He simply says, having forgotten that it’s this time of the year again, when you’ll be gone a lot due to your heat. It happens every year, but that doesn’t mean that Jungkook likes it- especially because he considers you part of his admittedly kind of odd pack.  
He gets upset when Taehyung is gone for more than a day as well.  
You’ve all been living together for a few years now, since rent prices have been rising, and you all had simultaneously started struggling paying for your own apartments around the same time. This, and the long-term friendship you’ve all had, resulted in the decision to simply move in together, with Jungkook’s original apartment becoming the new home for everyone.  
And to him, it had always been heaven- except for times like these. 
Taehyung knows of the crush his best friend has on you, mostly because he himself has the same feelings for you as well. It’s not as complicated between the two guys as one might think though, minus that they don’t know what your own emotional connection to them as of yet. It’s not that easy, after all- if you don’t have any feelings for either of them, you might feel too weird to continue living with them, and that’s just something they’d like to avoid.  
Then again, the moment you find that special someone that’s not them, you’ll leave as well.  
So what to do?  
“Can’t she just.. Stay here?” Jungkook huffs, sitting down next to Taehyung who’s been watching TV on his day off. “I don’t like it when she’s gone so long..”  
“She texted and said she’ll be back tomorrow, Kook.” Taehyung sighs. “And you know very well why she can’t be here.” The tiger hybrid reminds his friend, who just continues sulking on the couch.  
He especially is very much affected by your yearly heat every time- and while he can most certainly control himself, and poses no danger to you at all, he still can’t deny the effect you have on him. It’s one of the main reasons he feels so strongly about you not being here right now- his instincts yelling at him to keep you close and in sight during such a vulnerable time.  
But you’re not his mate, and he’s not your partner. He has to accept your decisions.  
Much to his surprise however, the door opens to reveal you back already- bag in hand and everything. Your more than annoyed expression immediately tells that something must’ve happened for you to come back home way earlier than you said you would.  
“What happened?” Taehyung wonders instantly, a hand on Jungkook’s shoulder keeping the tail-wagging wolf down on the couch until you’ve revealed why you’re back already.  
“I don’t know!” You whine. “But I couldn’t stay at all.” You complain, throwing your bag into your room before you walk into the open kitchen to grab a bottle of water. “Don’t worry, I’ve taken surpressors and basically bathed in scent-blocker.” You motion towards Taehyung holding Jungkook- and the second the tiger hybrid lets go of his friend, Jungkook is right at your side, hugging you from behind while you drink your water.  
To everyone else, this must look like he’s some touch-starved boyfriend. But to you, this is normal. Jungkook is always like this, especially during your mating season.  
And he’s also a wolf- a known kind of hybrid that just has a strong pack-mentality. It’s why Taehyung is a lot more independent compared to him- as a tiger hybrid, he’s more laid back and offers you a lot more freedom. At first, you actually thought he didn’t really like you- but after a thorough talk, you now know that he really does deeply care about you and Jungkook. He was just a little worried to overstep boundaries- that was it.  
But nowadays, boundaries just don’t seem to exist amongst the three of you.  
From Jungkook’s need for physical contact, to Taehyungs casual forms of bonding whenever you want something quiet- sometimes, you wonder if this is all still just a very good friendship. But right now, you don’t really care. Right now, you’re just happy to be back home and with your two best friends.  
“We can look for another hotel you can stay at?” Taehyung asks, a bit nervous at the sight of Jungkook shamelessly sniffing your neck, while his arms are wrapped around you. He knows that Jungkook can control himself, and he trusts him too- but his own instincts still make him a bit uneasy since he doesn’t know how you’ll react during such a time like this.  
After all, this would potentially be the first time you’ll spend your entire mating season at home, and not away from them. And that alone will most likely be a gigantic challenge for both of the hybrid men in this household.  
“No, I don’t know..” You whine to yourself, putting the bottle of water down on the kitchen counter. “I..” You’re quiet now, just staring ahead, and Jungkook perks up at that, looking over your shoulder to check on you.  
“You..?” He asks, wondering what you’re not saying out loud.  
“The.. You know, doctors there said I might..” you sigh, carefully removing Jungkook’s arms from you to put some distance between you and him, and Jungkook stares at you now like a kicked puppy, confused. And it alarms Taehyung too, who stays at a distance, but walks closer anyways. “They said because I live with you both, and have been for some time, I might’ve gotten..” You sigh, crossing your arms. “Instinctually.. Attached.” You mumble.  
It’s quiet for a moment. Jungkook is visibly caught off guard, looking over helplessly at Taehyung who’s just as lost as the wolf.  
Instinctually attached, basically is just a fancy way of saying that your body has started to believe that both Jungkook and Taehyung are your mates, and therefore your permanent partners- in every way, including the more intimate aspects. This is usually what you want to happen in a relationship- but in a mere friendship, this is basically the worst thing that could occur. 
Because this means that your body basically won’t accept anyone else as your heat partner whatsoever unless you’re confronted with flat out rejection. Which is what you expected to happen now- 
But they’re both oddly quiet, nervously looking around instead.  
And that makes you nervous in turn.  
“I mean.. What do you think about that?” Jungkook wonders, while Taehyung’s ears snap towards you as if to hear your answer better.  
“I.. Don't know?” You answer. “I really need you both to.. You know, reject me though. Otherwise we might be facing some issues.” You chuckle dryly, looking down nervously.  
“We can’t.” Taehyung simply answers, both Jungkook and you instantly looking at him. “What? You know even if we did, it wouldn’t change a thing because we wouldn’t mean it.” Taehyung says to Jungkook who’d been shaking his head in a bit of panic.  
“What?” You respond, confused.  
“I.. Well, what Taehyung is hinting at..” Jungkook rubs his neck nervously. “.. is that we both like you.” 
“Which would explain your situation.” Taehyung says, before he walks closer. “And what would explain this even better-” He says, his own tail rising behind him. “-Would be, that the feeling is mutual.”  
You stare at him, ears pinned back, having both of them wait for your answer. And you know you can’t lie. Because Taehyung is right.  
The rejection has to be mutual, and it has to be sincere.  
And you can’t do that.  
Because it would be a lie.  
And the second your body loses all tension, visibly admitting to your own emotional connection to them, Jungkook is right there, hugging you close to reassure you. “Why didn’t you say anything?” He wonders, and you just shrug.  
“Cause I thought it would be weird.” You confess. “And it would ruin our friendship.” You whine.  
“It doesn’t, I promise.” Taehyung reassures as well, now also at your side. “We’ve always been a pretty odd pack after all. Why not evolve into a pretty odd couple?” He shrugs, making you look at him wide eyed.  
“Wait, are you serious?” You ask, confused- But with the way Taehyung smiles, and Jungkook’s tail keeps wagging against one of the kitchen chairs, you don’t actually need a verbal response.  
And you know, they’re not just saying it because of your heat. Because it’s pretty clear to you now, in hindsight, that they’ve been very much openly hinting at it for a good year now.  
You’ve just blinded yourself with some made up excuses as to why it can’t be true.  
“At least you’re back home now.!” Jungkook sighs in bliss, holding you close again.  
“True, if not, he would’ve been yapping into my ear the entire weekend.” the tiger hybrid jokes, making Jungkook huff a bit embarrassed.  
“Well, you won’t have to miss me too much.” You giggle. “Just maybe a little bit when I have to you know, put my room on lockdown.” You say.  
“I mean, we could always help?” Jungkook shamelessly asks, causing Taehyung to shake his head.  
“Shut up you horny dog-” He scolds, but you but into it right away.  
“Won’t it be too fast?” You worry. “I mean.. I don’t know. Like, sure, I love you guys but, we probably should take it easy..” You drift off, looking at both the hybrids in question staring at you with eyes wide. “What?” You wonder, before Jungkook hides his face in the crook of your neck.  
“We love you too.!” He happily whines into your skin, tail wagging again, and even Taehyung can’t help but blush quite visibly, having to hide his face behind his head. And in that moment, one thing is for sure; you’ve always been an odd pack, and you’re already a pretty odd couple as well.  
But you already wouldn’t have it any other way. 
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strangermarvelss · 1 year
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all of the girls you loved before- e.m
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Pairing: Eddie Munson x Female!Reader
Summary: the one where eddie runs into his first love, leaving you to question your relationship in the aftermath. loosely based on the taylor swift song with the same title.
Warnings: angst, crying, jealousy, insecurity, eddie being rude unintentionally, cursing, pda (gross), eddie and reader are a few years out of high school, fluff, happy ending
Word Count: 4.8k
Request?: No
A/N: hello again everyone, its been a minute! since i’ve been gone, i’ve entered my swiftie era (not like crazy obsessed but def a fan of the music) and this gem of a song dropped and plucked some inspiration from me, so here is a new one shot for you all! enjoy! -sava
The haze within the hot open room of the Hideout was starting to dissipate, the crowd exiting the venue one by one as the band you’ve been cheering on from your spot at the bar begins clearing the stage of their equipment. The ringing in your ears has yet to go away, getting so lost in the metal music that you didn’t care if it would bite you in the ass at work tomorrow, you’d find a way to take customers orders at the diner, even if they had to scream in order for you to understand. 
You found yourself sitting at the same spot at the Hideout every Tuesday night to cheer your boyfriend and his band members on. Within the years since graduating high school, the town you called home started coming around to the type of music your boyfriend played, despite ridiculing him for years prior to their own revelations. With the new popularity, Tuesday nights at the Hideout have gone from 5 drunks sitting in the back to almost a packed house every week, begging for encores and autographs at the end of each show. It made you happy seeing your boyfriend celebrated in such a way, having been there for him in his lowest points when the tables were turned. Now you bask in his glory like never before, cheering him on alongside the rest of the town.
Paying your tab, you begin walking towards the back stage area when you see a tall lanky man with long luscious curls make his way over to you, his smile wide as his signature dimples poked into the sides of his cheeks. He extends his arms wide, not caring if he gets in anyones way as he greets you. Taking off in a run, you launch yourself into his arms, wrapping your arms around his neck and legs around his waist as he catches you, hands making contact with your ass in a not-so-subtle way. You pull away and look at him momentarily before pressing your lips to his.
You take in his scent as your mouths move together as one, the sweaty smell that was no match for masking with his cheap cologne filling your nostrils, but you didn’t mind one bit. You part away from his lips, looking at the deep chocolate irises that you love seeing on a daily basis before running a hand through his sweaty mop of curls. He sets you down and plays with his bangs, moving them to the side as they desperately try to cling to his damp forehead.
“You guys killed it tonight,” you tell him, pulling him in for another hug. He wraps an arm around you, pulling you into his side and twisting his upper body and leaning down to press a kiss to your hair before flashing a closed mouth smile at you.
“Couldn’t have done it without my number one fan,” he says, cupping your cheek with his large calloused hand and placing yet another kiss to your body, this time directed at your forehead.
“So I was thinking that maybe tonight we go back to my apartment and watch some movies? I know we usually go bother my coworkers at the diner after your show but I kind of just want some you and me time,” you tell him with a smile.
“That sounds even better than going to the diner. I bet you’ve already picked out a selection of movies.” “You know me so well. I rented Halloween, Nightmare on Elm St-“
“Eddie? Eddie Munson?” a feminine voice calls out from behind you. You and Eddie turn around, watching a slim figure approach you with a bashful look plastered on her face. As she got closer, you noticed she was wearing a short black leather skirt and a bright pink top, barely leaving anything to the imagination with the amount of cleavage she was showing. Her hair was long and straight, looking silky to the touch as her skin glowed under the colorful stage lights that were still on. Who the hell is this, and how did she know Eddie?
Eddie squints his eyes as she approaches the two of you, his face relaxing and the smile growing wider than you’ve ever seen it when he finally makes out her features. You won’t deny the twinge you feel in your chest as you watch him drop your hand and give the mysterious woman a big embrace, bigger than the one he gave you moments ago.
“Holy shit! How are you? I haven’t seen you in forever,” Eddie exclaims, breaking away and tucking his hands under his armpits.
“M’good! Just finished up college not too long ago so I came back to Hawkins while I search for something a little more permanent,” she tells him, her timid demeanor going out the window as you watch the two grow comfortable with one another. “I see things at the Hideout have changed since we went to high school not too long ago.”
“Yeah, they sure have,” Eddie chuckles, kicking one of his feet out as he looks down. “Looks like the people in this shit town have finally come around when it comes to listening to good music.”
As you watch the interactions from person to person unfold in front of you, you feel the familiar tickle in your nose begin, hoping and praying that you won’t be noticeable if you aren’t able to get rid of the impending sneeze.
“Achoo!” You exclaim, bending down and hiding your nose in the crook of your elbow, silently yelling at yourself when you watch both pairs of eyes land on you.
“Bless you,” the mystery woman says with a smile. You nod, taking a step forward to try and join in on the conversation.
“Thank you,” you tell her, extending your hand. “I’m Y/N by the way, Eddie’s girlfriend.”
You watch Eddie nod as she takes your hand, shaking it firmly. “I’m Heather.”
Suddenly you feel your brain catching up with the rest of the world, clicking into place once the name leaves her mouth. This was the Heather you’d heard so much about from Eddie’s friends. The same Heather that just so happened to be his first love, capturing his heart in ways you wish you could’ve done yourself. If only you’d moved to Hawkins earlier in your high school career compared to your senior year, a.k.a Eddie’s second attempt at being a senior. 
The members of the Hellfire Club gave you all the details that you needed to know about Heather: that she was Eddie’s first everything. First date, first love, first time, and eventually, his first heartbreak. The two were smitten with one another when no one else wanted to look Eddie’s way, with all the judgy classmates questioning why they were together in the first place. They didn’t see Eddie for who he truly was, they only ever judged him based on his outer appearance. The same goes for Heather: everyone always questioned why someone as hot as her would settle for someone like Eddie, which always made you upset to hear.
“It’s really nice to meet you Heather. I’ve heard a lot about you,” you tell her, trying your best to sound as sincere as possible. Eddie shoots you a look, silently telling you to stop, which makes your heart drop a bit. Adverting your eyes from him, you look back at Heather, who didn’t miss the interaction. 
“All good things I hope,” she jokes.
“Are you kidding? Of course all good things. I can only hope you extended the same courtesy for me, if you did tell your college friends about me,” he says, rushing the last part out. Was he getting nervous?
“I can assure you that I did. Even after the way things ended…” she says, looking down to the ground as her sentence trails off. You can sense the tension in the air, feeling as if you’re causing the vibe of the conversation to shift a bit. Masking your feelings with a smile, you turn to them and excuse yourself, lying about needing to use the restroom before heading out for the night. Holding the curtain to the side, you enter the backstage area and round a counter towards an empty hallway you know nobody ever comes down after the shows, as you and Eddie have had your share of moments in this very spot, both PG and R rated moments.
As the secluded feeling sinks in, you feel the confidence and happiness that filled your body just moments ago begin to evaporate, vanishing into thin air as you replay the last few minutes in your head. His big smile when he saw her, the big and warm embrace, the look he gave you when you nudged your way into the conversation. It made you want to shrink into yourself. Jealousy was never something you were known for having, usually being more focused on the moment at hand and knowing the security you had with the relationships you had with the people around you.
But the history between Eddie and Heather changed that.
When you first heard about Heather, you didn’t pay much attention to it because you knew that was his past. He told you numerous times that he loves you and loves being with you, and it made you confident in the strength of your relationship. But knowing how strong those feelings he had for Heather and seeing her interact with him in real time, it changed things. He was a different man from the one he was in high school, having graduated and making a name for himself with the music he loves performing. And now that Heather is back in Hawkins for a while, it makes you wonder what could happen between the two of them. 
Would they be able to reconcile? It didn’t look like there were any harsh feelings anymore, so maybe making up was still an option for them. What if Eddie wanted to revisit his past and be with the girl he loved before you came into his life? Was the love he had for her stronger than the love he has for you?
You could feel yourself being to spiral, your arms wrapping around your body and hugging on tight. Your breathing was starting to become jagged and unsteady, trying your best to take deep breaths slowly to get yourself to calm down. Thinking the worst was always such an easy solution for you, because preparing for the worst and not being shocked by the disappointment that lies ahead was better than being blind to the impending doom.
Once you feel yourself becoming calmer, you exit the hallway and walk towards the curtain once again, hesitating and stopping in your tracks. Peeking your head out, you can see the two of them still talking, Eddie throwing his head back in laughter as the two share a funny moment with one another, making your heartache grow. Retreating back behind the curtain, you turn and see Gareth walking your way, a smug look on his face before contorting into a welcoming smile.
“Hey Y/N! Glad to see you made it out tonight, even though I know you’re in the audience every Tuesday,” he says, wrapping his arms around you. You give him a quick hug, pulling away and failing to mask the hurt as you see his demeanor change. “Everything okay?”
“Yeah! Yeah, everything is fine…it’s just, Heather is here tonight. She came up to Eddie and I and started talking with him and catching up-“
“Wait, Heather Heather?” Gareth asks before poking his head out of the curtain. “Holy shit! I had no idea she was back in town. Still looks as hot as ever.”
Pretending to ignore that, you let out a sigh and tap him on the shoulder. Gareth turns to you, lifting a brow.
“Can you make out what her and Eddie are talking about? I think I sort of killed their vibe earlier and now it looks like things are picking up now that I’m not there.”
“Yeah, hang on one second,” he tells you before disappearing behind the curtain. As much as you appreciate Gareth helping, you were more scared to know how the conversation is going. With all the possibilities that were swirling around in your head, it was just getting fogged up with negativity that you were not expecting this evening and you hated going to such a low place.
A moment later, Gareth pops back from the other side of the curtain with a neutral expression, which worries you more than it should. You raise your eyebrows at him, bracing yourself for whatever news that he was about to deliver.
“So I used the gig as an excuse to talk with them and told Eddie that we were almost done loading the equipment up, which is true, and he said he’d be back here in a minute. But as I was walking away, I heard Heather mention how they should catch up another time over coffee and when I looked back, she was writing her number down on a napkin for him,” he explains.
Somehow the news hurts you more than you imagined it would. With their plans on the horizon sometime soon, it made the insecurities rise once again. You knew how special someone’s first love could be because Eddie was that for you. Before moving to Hawkins, you had your fair share of dating but none that meant much to you compared to the feelings your harbor for Eddie. Knowing that he already experienced that with someone else didn’t bother you until that person had to show up right there in front of you. A majority of these worries and doubts reside in your head, you’re aware of that, but it almost feels as if there is going to be a choice he is going to make, and it isn’t looking good for your side.
You can feel the tears beginning to well in your eyes, unable to hide the frown that resides on your lips as you process what Gareth told you. Looking at him, you flash him a sad smile before wiping away at your bottom lash line, a half-baked attempt to get rid of the tears. He rests a hand on your shoulder, ducking his head down to try and make eye contact with you. 
“Hey, don’t get sad, okay? Heather is just Eddie’s past, but you’re his present and his future. You don’t have anything to worry about,” he tries to reassure you.
“Yeah, you might be right,” you tell him before meeting his gaze and making eye contact. “But you didn’t see the way he looked at her. The way he smiled at her, the way he held her. On top of that, the way he looked at me when I talked to her. I’m worried that I actually do have something to worry about,” you explain.
Now it was Gareth’s turn to frown, breaking the eye contact and staring at the floor below. He should know better than anyone how Eddie felt about Heather all those years ago and it doesn’t just go away overnight. 
“I think I should go. I’m going to sneak around the other way…will-will you tell Eddie I wasn’t feeling good or something? If you can think of a good excuse, just use it, because my brain is fogged up right now and I can’t think of any,” you ask. Gareth nods, sending a sad smile your way before you disappear behind more curtains as you make your way around the stage to exit through the front doors unnoticed.
—————————————————————————————————————
It’s been three days since you’ve last seen Eddie.
Clocking out of your shift at the diner, you sigh as you realize its your usual date night with Eddie, yet haven’t heard a word from him since the awkward encounter with his ex at the Hideout. To say the silence has hurt you would be an understatement, as you wait by the phone any chance you’re home hoping he will call. He always makes it a point to call you at the end of each day when he knows you both are already off work, catching up on each others days and talking for hours before falling asleep.
Now you’re going home alone for the fourth night in a row, wasting away as you prepare yourself for when Eddie does eventually call you to break things off, telling you he wants to try things with Heather again while she is in town and rekindle the blissful and naive love they once held in their hearts for one another.
Tossing your jacket on the back of one of the chairs at your kitchen table, you let out a sigh as you begin making your way to your bedroom and undressing your uniform. Quickly, you change into a comfortable band t-shirt and a pair of gym shorts, tossing your dirty uniform in your laundry basket before going back to the kitchen. Opening your fridge, you spot the bottle of wine you have been eyeing every day after work this week. The delicious red teasing you and wanting you to indulge in the sweet liquid to cope with the impending end of your relationship.
“Fuck it,” you mutter to yourself, before grasping the bottle and twisting the cap open. Opening the cabinet above, you grab the first wine glass you see and take it out, pouring the wine in until it gets close the the rim. You take hold of the glass and make your way over to your couch, bringing the glass to your lips and letting the wine travel down your throat with ease. 
Before you’re able to bask in the taste, you hear your doorbell ring throughout your apartment. With a puzzled expression, you set the glass of wine down on your coffee table and make your way back to the front door, sliding the peep hold cover to the side to get a look at just who could be outside. Rolling your eyes, you take a deep breath before opening the door, standing face to face with the man who owns your heart. At least, for the next few minutes.
“Hey sweetheart,” he says with a smile.
“What are you doing here?” You ask straight out of the gate. 
“Good to see you too,” he says, raising his eyebrows and looking down at the pizza box resting in his hands for a moment. “I wasn’t sure what you wanted to do for date night tonight, so I just took it as an opportunity to plan an evening of pizza, movies, and indulging in the new weed I got from Rick yesterday.”
“I just thought we weren’t going to do date night this week since I hadn’t heard from you,” you say.
“Sorry sweetheart, that is my bad.” He tells you as he makes his way inside your apartment. He sets the pizza on the kitchen table and opens the fridge and pulls a beer out. “I’ve been extremely busy this week with work, band practice, and…uh, well…”
“Heather?” You question, closing the door and resting your back against it as you bring your arms to cross in front of your chest. He stills for a moment, frozen in place as silence falls over the apartment unit. Turning to you, he raises his eyebrows while biting his lip, his physical look of guilt showing front and center. Trying your best to remain stoic, you quirk a brow at him, keeping your position at the door as you wait for an explanation. 
“How, uh…how’d you know about that?” He finally asks after several minutes of silence.
“Gareth told me before I left on Tuesday. Said he overheard her giving you her number,” you answer plainly.
Another beat of silence falls throughout the room. Eddie’s attention is on the floor below him, kicking his feet as he digs his hands into the pockets of his black jeans and forgetting about the beer he was excited about enjoying. You find your eyes diverting to the ground as well, finding it hard to look over at your favorite metalhead. Mentally preparing yourself for the ache to grow, you finally let out a deep sigh, your hand coming up to rub at your forehead before you work up the courage to look at him again.
“Look, if you came all this way to let me down gently with pizza and weed, you can just save yourself the trouble. I’ve already spent the past few days preparing for this, so lets just call it what it is and go on about our lives, okay?” You muster out, feeling your throat close up and voice waver towards the end. You shut your mouth, turning your head as you feel your bottom lip begin to quiver. Opening the door, you step to the side and remain silent, not trusting yourself to speak anymore. You can’t breakdown in front of him, not when he’s choosing another girl over you.
You hear his heavy footsteps grow closer to you, stopping right before your figure. Your eyes are planted to the floor, seeing his stark white Reeboks enter your vision before leaving once again. Suddenly, you feel his hand lay on top of the one holding the handle to the front door, guiding it to a close and stepping to the side.
“I’m not breaking up with you,” he reveals.
You whip your neck in the direction he moved to, seeing the sad expression on his face as his big brown cow eyes look into yours. Part of you was hesitant to question him about it, not wanting his mind to change in a matter of seconds and leave you in a puddle of sadness afterall. But the more logical part of your brain wanted answers. Why did he not bother calling you for days but thought it was okay to hang out with his ex? Why didn’t he confess earlier about seeing her around? Why was he acting so strange at the Hideout, and why didn’t he want you talking to her?
“What?”
“I said I’m not breaking up with you, sweetheart. Why was that even a thought that popped into your head?” He asks, his voice level and sweet. He takes a step closer to you, filling the small gap that had separated you moments ago before slowly extending an arm out to you, cupping your cheek in his hand and rubbing the pad of his thumb across the soft skin.
“I don’t know…” you finally answer, the lack of confidence in your voice giving you away as your sentence trails off.
“C’mon, I know you had to think that somehow. I won’t be mad or anything, I promise. Just want my sweet girl to talk to me.” You take the beat of silence to think about to how explain it to him without coming across as a jealous and needy girlfriend. You can do this, you think to yourself.
“It’s just-I know how you felt during that relationship and how deep the feelings were thanks to Gareth and Jeff, a-and the way you were talking to her and looking at her at the Hideout on Tuesday made it look like no time had passed and that the feelings were still there. I mean, she gave you her number Eds! A-and you just said you hung out with her!” You exclaim, breaking out of his grasp and retreating towards the living room. You run a hand down your face, sighing as you try to level your heavy breathing. 
“Okay, when you put it like that…yeah it sounds bad,” you hear him say from the kitchen. You sit on the couch, taking a large sip of the wine you abandoned earlier. Eddie turns around and stalks over to you, sitting on the chair opposite of you, not wanting to get too close again after the failed attempt. “But baby, I promise nothing happened with Heather and I, okay? We went over to Rick’s last night after grabbing coffee and smoked. Nothing more.”
“I just wish you told me about it,” you let out, feeling deflated from the way you were reacting.
“I know baby, and I’m sorry I didn’t. Work had been busy and when I was going to call you after I woke up yesterday, Heather called and asked to hang out at the coffee shop. I should’ve used the payphone outside the place or hell, called you before I left my place. If I could go back and do so I would.”
You flash him a half-hearted smile, looking back towards your wine glass before picking it up once again. Bringing it to your lips, you take another big sip, beginning to feel the effects of the alcohol move throughout your limbs and send a tingling feeling in them. Out of the corner of your eye, you watch Eddie slide over onto the couch, still leaving room between the two of you as he leans his arms on his knees, hanging his head down a bit and letting his long mane of curls move forward with him.
“You want to know what we talked about yesterday? Over coffee?” He asks, quirking a brow your way as he shifts a bit from his position.
“Hmm?”
“We caught up, I asked her about college, she told me all kinds of stories. Even told me the story of how she met her fiancé, who moved in with her when she came back to Hawkins. They’re getting married in November, a few weeks before Thanksgiving which I thought was nice. Then I talked to her about you, and how we’ve been dating since the winter of ’84 and been inseparable since then. I must’ve been smiling really hard or something because she pointed out how happy I looked when I talk about you, which is true,” he chuckles out, a silly grin creeping onto his features.
Now it was your turn to smile, unable to hide the warm and fuzzy feeling that made its way into your chest at hearing the words. You set the wine glass back down, shifting on the couch so you were facing his direction, legs crossed as you leaned over to take his hand in yours. “Really?”
“Oh of course baby. Look, what I had with Heather all those years ago was great, and I appreciate the time I had with her then. But loving her taught me how to be better and show the person I was really meant for all the more love and affection that they deserve. You,” he boops your nose, making a giggle escape past your lips. “-you are the one I love now and will love until I take my last breath okay? All the shit I’ve been through was worth it because it brought you to me when you moved here, and I am so fucking happy about that. Wouldn’t trade that for anything.”
You can’t help but feel the burning sensation behind your eyes at Eddie’s sweet words. Sure, you still felt like a bit of a fool for acting like a jealous girlfriend, but hearing Eddie shut down all your worries and reassure you about his feelings for you in the nicest way you could’ve imagined warmed your heart. You move your hand to the back of his neck, pulling him towards you and closing the distance between you as your lips meet his. His hand instinctively goes to your hip, holding you closer as his mouth moves against yours in fever.
Eventually pulling away, you lean your forehead against his, giggling to yourself as you feel his bangs tickle the sensitive skin of your cheeks. You look at his big brown eyes, seeing the soft look he was giving you and melting all over again.
“Sorry for acting like a jealous girlfriend babe. Not the prettiest look for me if I’m being honest,” you joke.
“Hey, if the roles were reversed, I would totally act the way you did, so I get it. But now you know that you don’t ever have to worry about anyone else, because like I said, you’re it for me baby. I love you.”
“I love you more,” you say, pressing your lips to his cheek. He shoots you a grin, breaking contact with your forehead and rubbing slow circles into the fabric of your leggings. 
“How about I warm up that pizza I brought over and we pop in one of those movies I rented? You probably need some food after all that wine you drank,” he says, making you laugh. Nodding, you agree.
“That sounds like the best idea you’ve had.”
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wannabeschyulersister · 2 months
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where’s that man who’d throw blankets over my barbed wire?
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*another angsty carmy fic coming right up*
“Ma’am? I’m sorry but we will need the table if your guest hasn’t arrived yet,” the waiter told you. You could tell he felt embarrassed to have to practically kick you out after being stood up.
You set the nice white napkin that had been on your lap on the empty plate in front of you, “I understand. Thanks for keeping me company.”
The waiter helped you put your coat back on and you placed a nice tip on the table before walking out. It felt so humiliating to sit at that table for the past hour alone.
Carmen forgot your anniversary.
You had been perfectly fine celebrating your two year anniversary with him in your nice apartment but he was the one that wanted to go all out. He chose the fancy French restaurant and made the reservation.
He was also the one that didn’t show up.
At first, you began to panic, thinking that something had happened to him on his way to the restaurant. You must’ve texted him a dozen times. When you checked his location, you saw that he was at The Bear.
There’s no way that he would forget your anniversary. Right?
Well, he did.
You walked until you were able to find a cab. Part of you wanted to confront Carmen at The Bear but you didn’t want to make a scene. Despite how mad you were at him, you respected his place of business.
Instead of going there, you went to the apartment that you shared with Carmen to wait for him. You didn’t even bother changing out of the red dress that specifically bought for that evening when you made it home. Taking off your coat, you placed it on the hook and sat on the couch.
It was an hour later when you heard the jingle of keys and the front door open and close. “Babe? You here?”
You didn’t answer him as he walked into the living room.
He set his phone and keys down on the coffee table in front of you, “Hey, what are you all dressed up for?”
“Our anniversary dinner that was two hours ago.” You answered coldly.
Carmen froze as it dawned on him that he forgot, “Fuck. Babe, I’m so fuckin’ sorry. Things have been so hectic at the restaurant these last few days and it totally slipped my mind. My phone died a few hours ago. I’m so sorry.”
He sat down next to you and tried to grab your hand. You moved it out of his grasp. “I waited for you for an hour, Carmen. It was so embarrassing. The waiter made me leave because they needed the table. How could you forget?”
“I told you. It seemed like everything that could go wrong did today. We had three waitstaff out with the flu-“
You cut him off, “Syd could’ve taken care of things for one night so that you could go out with your girlfriend! Aren’t I important too?”
Carmen looked like that question pissed him off, “Are you seriously askin’ me that fuckin’ question?”
You stood up from the couch needing some space from him, “Yes, I am because this isn’t the first time! How many times have you had to reschedule our plans? How many days do I barely see you? We’ve been together for two years, Carmen and I feel like we are just two strangers at this point.”
“Why haven’t you said anything then if you feel that way?”
“I’ve tried to have date nights and I’ve even stopped by The Bear to see if you can go on a coffee break. You always turn me down because something more important is pressing.” You’d been dying to have this conversation with him for some time now.
After countless times of letting things go, you were blurting out everything that you’d want to tell him. It had all been weighing so heavily on you lately. You could feel it draining you.
“(Y/n), I inherited a mess from Michael. I had to look after everyone’s jobs and-“
You interrupted him again, “I’m not saying that you have to choose me or the restaurant, Carmen. That would be incredibly selfish of me. But…. it’s like you’re out building this life for yourself and I’m just here hoping that you give me an ounce of attention.”
“You’re making it sound like our relationship is horrible. I thought that we were doing good.”
That almost hurt you more than being stood up on your anniversary. He thought that things were good? He hadn’t noticed that the two of you were so incredibly distant?
“Things haven’t been good in a long time. When we first started dating, you were present and it seemed like you’d do anything to spend time with me.”
“That was before we remodeled the restaurant. I had more time but now-“
“Now, you’re too busy for me.”
He shook his head, “I’m not, (Y/n). I just had more time back then. Now, it’s all on me. I’m stressed out.”
“I don’t want to add to your stress, Carmen.”
“Wh-what are you trying to say?” He stood up and made his way closer to you. You could tell that he was anxious about where the direction of this conversation was going.
“I’m not happy. I haven’t been for a while. I’ve tried to make things better but I can’t do it alone. I deserve to be with someone who I don’t have to beg to want to be with me.”
“(Y/n), I don’t want to be without you. I’ll start coming home earlier and I’ll uh have Sydney and Marcus start taking some more responsibility. I will-“
“And in a month when things are super crazy at The Bear because of the holidays? We’re back in this situation again. What kind of promises will you make then?”
Carmen seemed confused, “Do you not want to work on things?”
“A month ago, hell even a few weeks ago, I would’ve said yes, but I’m tired, Carmen. Tonight felt like it was the last straw. Sitting alone, you not answering your phone, it was embarrassing and so painful. I love you so much. But I think for the both of us, it’ll be better if we weren’t together.”
“I don’t want us to break up, (Y/n). I love you.” Carmen said softly.
You pulled him closer. He rested his head against your shoulder, “We can both focus on ourselves. I’m so proud of everything that you’ve done. You deserve all of the praise that is coming your way.”
You wanted to appear strong but on the inside you were breaking as well. There was a point in time where you imagined spending the rest of your life with Carmen Berzatto.
Now, there was a strong possibility that he wouldn’t be in your future. Were you making the right decision?
It might’ve felt like you weren’t in the moment. You just wanted to feel wanted and happy and with someone who couldn’t get enough of you. Carmen was that man at first. Things changed for the better and for the worse.
“I hate that I took you for granted. I will regret it for the rest of my life.” You felt him kiss your neck softly.
“I’ll still be here if you need me. You know that right?”
He nodded as you both stood there wrapped around each other saying your goodbyes without words.
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hotpinkstars · 2 months
Note
AHHH LOVED THE AL HAITHAM FIC SMM but if you dont mind what was going through al haithams head when he realized she left??
-> the house will never be the same again pt. 2
synopsis -> after being incredibly disrespected by your husband, alhaitham, you moved to liyue. what is going through his mind when you leave?
a/n -> AHHH i'm so happy you liked it!!! and i don't mind making a pt. 2 at all sorry this has been sitting here for a while but i hope you enjoy! here is part 1.
warnings -> all hurt no comfort, reader never turns up lol
w/c -> 1.2k
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it’s been about a week now, and you’re already settled into liyue. you’ve caught the eye of a bunch of passersby in the city- a sumeru vision wielder living in liyue harbor? 
thankfully, you had the traveler and a kind woman from the qixing named ganyu able to assist you with questions about the city. the first day you got there, she noticed your vision, and asked you all about it. it soon led to the two of you hitting off the start of a friendship in a nice restaurant- with ganyu telling you all of the things to do in liyue, the jobs that can be taken, and how magical the lantern rite especially is. you mentioned to her that you had a passion for the arts, and she immediately helped you look for a side job to make a little bit of mora to pay rent in your nice abode in the middle of the harbor.
“so, were your travels from sumeru alright? i’ve heard trudging through desert is not a very enjoyable experience..” ganyu questioned, a slight grin to be found on her face. “though, i have heard that the city down there is very nice. i would love to visit for myself one day, but with work and adeptal business it makes my days a little tight.”
you nod before replying. “the city is beautiful, especially at night. theres a gorgeous stage down there too, where a young woman named nilou always performs on special events. it’s always been the most majestic part of the city, or at least in my opinion.” 
ganyu lets out a noise of fascination, before giggling a little. “i would love to watch her dance. nilou is a familiar name, some people here strictly go to sumeru just to see her. i bet she’s as wonderful as everyone makes her out to be.” ganyu sighs. “i wonder if she travels? we have nice performing places here, too.”
you nod. “occasionally. it mostly has to be a big event for her to arrive, though.” you take another bite of your food. “but i bet if i asked her, she’d come out for at least a few days.”
that made ganyu smile once more, before she asked another question. “well, this may be an odd question, but do you have any romantic relationships?” 
“well, that's the reason i decided to move here,” now it is your turn to sigh, making ganyu have a confused look dancing across her face. “my partner and i got into an argument. he wouldn’t stop overworking himself, and i simply just wanted him to come to bed. but he’s so stubborn, and he took his work stress out on me. there was… certainly a lot of name calling.”
ganyus look of confusion immediately switches to an apologetic one. “ah, you made the right choice. that’s no way to treat your spouse.” 
you nod in agreement, before finishing your dish and pushing it slightly out in front of you. 
“well, i’m going to head back to my apartment now. this was very nice, we should do it again sometime!” you smile before standing and putting some money on the table. “here, this should be half. have a good night, ganyu!”
“goodnight to you too, y/n! i’ll see you soon.” 
now, back on alhaithams end..
he hasn’t been home in about a week and a half, due to his work causing his presence nearly 24/7. that pretty much means he hasn’t realized you’ve left yet. 
as he walks home, he doesn’t know how he would approach you. does he pretend the issue doesn’t exist? does he keep ignoring you? does he apologize? he thought his mind would split open.
as he walks through the door, he notices that the house is a little… emptier, from when the two of you lived together. he walked through the whole place, looking into the bathrooms to see your products gone. looking at the laundry room, met with no clothes that are yours hanging from the clothesline. and now, when he went to your bedroom…
your pillowcases have been stripped from the bed, and your pillow thrown into the closet. there were only a stack of two pillows, right in the middle of the bed. now his heart was thumping, and really hard. he looked through the dressers. the left side was barren, leaving only his side full. the thing that brought tears to the mans eyes was seeing your wedding ring on your side of the table. 
so you really left him. he stands there, shocked, unknowing of what to do. does he try to find you, or does he let you go? oh, how he regrets ever talking to you the way he did. if he just took your advice, you would be in bed, waiting for his arrival. likely bringing him into a hug, shaking all his worries and stress away as you whispered questions along about how his day was. 
the next few days felt like someone kept coming over to his desk and stabbing his back with blades like his. he felt so regretful, doing everything he can to stay composed while at the same time trying to find where you’ve gone. dehya won’t give him anything besides “somewhere close to sumeru that’s not sumeru.” that could mean you’ve gone to fontaine, liyue, or monstadt. how would he ever find you?
he’d ask the gaurds, and they all told him you went in the direction of the chasm. getting somewhere, but not close enough. he could walk all that way and come up empty handed. he doesn’t have an exact pinpoint on you yet. 
he’d ask nilou. she’d just shrug and say something along the lines of “i heard what happened, but i do not know fully where they went.” 
he walked the paths of the city, lost deep in thought. everyone thought it was a little out of character for someone such as him to look and feel as lost as he is. as much as people wondered what happened, they kept their mouths shut.
and for the people who noticed your absence, too, they’d ask different people who would likely have knowledge. but alhaitham didn’t know where to go now. he could walk the whole chasm and still not have you turn up. he could check every apartment complex in liyue harbor, and knock on every door on the outskirts. he could sail the seas to inazuma, and walk every separate island to see who may be housing you, or what commission you may have been taken in by. he could fall down the very waterfall that leads an entrance to the enchanting location called enkanomiya. he could go to fontaine, dive under the waters, walk every rocky mountain, and even visit the fortress of meropide. he could fight every monster near the city of monstadt, looking upon every rooftop for signs of your art, blown through the city of wind. but he still wouldn’t find you.
now what he doesn’t know is that you’re in liyue harbor, and nobody frets to tell him that anytime soon. for now, they’re just going to let him suffer, the same way he let you.
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whorergal · 1 year
Text
SHE'S MINE (PART TWO)
summary: after you've been attacked, the group becomes cautious and confused, now being targeted as well. but you still can't get over the fact that ghostface had helped you and why you think you know who it may be. and maybe you wouldn't mind keeping a secret.
warnings: scream vi spoilers, language (cussing), blood, gore. it follows the plot loosely.
pairings: ethan landry x fem!reader
authors note: hiiii i really hope u enjoy :-) also i have no idea if mindy shared the apartment with tara, sam and quinn but if she didn’t, we're just going to pretend she does and i also altered ethan's motive a bit too for this (lowkey was inspired by don't blame me by taylor swift so if you like listening to music when reading, i recommend that song for this part)
❗️: you can find part one here and part three here if you need it :3
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The hospital visit wasn't as long as you anticipated. Two of the stabs you endured hadn't cut deep so they were able to stitch it upon your first visit and they closed up that same night—it still hurt like a bitch. Your previous stab wound was the worst one overall as the stitching process was a lot more painful because your skin was sensitive as it had been punctured once before.
When you were released, Sam took you under her care. She didn't feel safe having you and Anika alone in your apartment since the attack so she offered her, Tara, Mindy and Quinn's home to you two. It didn't really matter for Anika as she was always there in the first place but it bothered you.
You didn't mean to feel unappreciative but you hated being controlled by useless fear. Whether or not Ghostface attacked you in your home, he would find them someway or another; it didn't matter where you were. But, you agreed in order to clear her conscious.
They didn't ask much questions when you were in the hospital. After the second Ghostface left the apartment, you remembered blacking out and waking up in the hospital bed with Anika by your side. The doctor wouldn't let anyone come in since you were preparing for surgery but decided to let Anika stay since she was your roommate.
Her story was that your security system she had built when you two first moved in had went off when the second Ghostface broke in. Her and Mindy didn't tell everyone before leaving because they didn't want to risk not making it in time. The frat house was only a block down so they just ran their way to your building, ultimately finding your unconscious body on the kitchen floor.
Anika told you that they had met Ethan at the entrance of the building when the ambulance was called and said you called him, which was true but you wondered what took him so long. You were highly suspicious of him but you didn't want to be because he was your best-friend, you couldn't imagine him having anything to do with this.
Ever since that night, he was around, a lot. He even skipped his Econ classes to keep you company because Sam didn't want you to be alone and everyone else was busy.
You didn't ask him about what happened. You were afraid of what the outcome would be. But you knew you had to do something in order to understand. At least interrogating the truth out of him (because he couldn't lie to you) would give you peace of mind—well, depending on the answer.
"You don't have to be here, you know." You broke the silence, watching him write notes from the lecture he was missing.
"But I want to be," he told you honestly.
"E, you're missing Econ. You have an exam this week."
"I'll be fine, don't worry." He looked up from his notebook, putting the lecture video on pause to give you his full attention. "I don't want anything to happen to you again."
"Ghostface rarely attacks in the daytime," you joked.
"Still, Y/N/N." He was being serious. "Your stitches haven't even fully healed yet."
"This isn't the first time." You sighed. "Plus, Ghostface never attacks the same person twice."
"Says who?"
"Says Mindy."
Ethan rolled his eyes. "Yeah, well, I don't want to take any chances."
It went back to comfortable silence. You went back to reading your book for your English class while he continued to write his notes. After a couple more minutes, you decided to ask the question that had been eating you alive.
"What took you so long?" you asked randomly.
He furrowed his brows, turning to look at you. "What do you mean?"
"When I was attacked," you clarified. "I called you and you said you and Chad were on the way. Anika and Mindy beat you to it and Chad wasn't even with you when you arrived."
Ethan looked away, his face becoming pale. "Well, I went to go find Chad when you were on the call but I couldn't find him so I decided to leave. I didn't realize how much time I wasted until I saw police lights outside your building."
That was the first and final conversation you two had about it. You gathered what you knew from it but, again, you didn't want to believe he was Ghostface. Unless he wasn't and used the costume to throw the other one off. But where could he buy a replica of it that quickly and still be able to make it in time to save you? It didn't make sense.
You kept this realization to yourself. You felt guilty for it, especially because if he was apart of the plan in harming your friends, this smudge of proof could be enough to hold him accountable before it was taken too far. Of course, you didn't listen to yourself and decided to keep his secret that he wasn't even sure you knew because of how much you liked him.
On the third day of your recovery, your stitching was finally beginning to heal. It hurt to bend down and sometimes walk because it worked the muscles underneath the wound but you couldn't stand doing nothing anymore.
You made the excuse that you were planning to meet Ethan at his dorm for the night because you promised to help him with Econ. Sam wasn't exactly keen on the idea, wondering why he couldn't come to meet you here but you told her you were beginning to feel claustrophobic and wanted to get out. She didn't say much in defense and reluctantly agreed.
They all offered to walk you there just in case something were to happen but you brushed them off. If your assumption about Ethan was correct, he wouldn't let anything happen to you.
The subway was packed because it was nearing Halloween and it took you awhile to finally make it inside one. And the thirty minute ride to campus added onto the time. It was around twelve at night when you arrived at his dorm.
First, you decided to knock. Nobody answered. Then you remembered he had an Econ lecture to attend for the night and took out the extra key he had given you awhile ago and unlocked it yourself.
Honestly, you were glad he wasn't there because it would make your digging a lot more easier.
You searched through everything he owned. Through his drawers (which you highly regretted), under his bed, inside some of his unpacked bags—everywhere but you couldn't find anything that incriminated him.
It had been what felt like hours, but was really only thirty minutes, when you gave up. Your phone was going off but you didn't pay any mind to it because the group had consistently texted you ever since your attack; you just assumed it was them checking up on you and then getting paranoid because you weren't answering. Even if you knew you should've checked, you didn't bother as you were going to head back to the apartment anyway.
You quietly snuck out of the room, making sure the coast was clear until you turned your head to the left and saw Ghostface, waiting there for you. When you tried to scream, they grabbed your face with their hand, restricting your voice from releasing.
They were strong, being able to grab your entire body with their one arm and toss you carelessly back into the room.
You hit the floor, wincing at the impact because of your stitches. Ghostface shut the door behind them, looking down at you. They stalked toward you very slowly as you made sure to keep your distance from them.
Using the dresser that stood behind you, you lifted yourself up with your available arm as the other clutched your stitching instinctively to keep you balanced. It was a silent stare-down until they reached for their mask, untucking it from the behind. Then, they pulled it off.
You stared in shock. "…Ethan?"
"Y/N." He didn't have much expression on his face. He looked out of breath as you could see sweat shimmering on his face from the lighting.
"Oh, my god," You breathed out. Although you suspected him this whole time, finally being able to know it was the truth hurt you more than being stabbed. "You're Ghostface."
"What the hell are you doing here?" Ethan ignored your statement as he furrowed his brows.
"I knew it. I knew you were the one who saved me," you confessed. "That's why I'm here."
"You shouldn't be here," he told you, shaking his head.
"You're trying to kill me and our friends and you're telling me what I shouldn't be doing?!"
"Y/N, there's more to this than you know."
"That much is obvious," you snapped. He tried to step toward you but you backed up. "Stay away from me."
"Please, just listen to me," Ethan began to plead.
"You let them attack me!"
"No, I didn't!" he declared, lowering his voice when he saw it made you flinch. "They promised to leave you out of it. That was the only thing I told them to do."
"They?" you repeated in confusion.
He thought over his response for a second. "Look, what I'm doing—what I've done—is for a good reason. You have to understand."
You furrowed your brows. "What have you done, E?" You couldn't help but use his nickname; you couldn't help but try to hear him out.
"Y/N." He walked toward you slowly and this time, you didn't back away from him. "You're the only thing I care about. If it means I have to kill a thousand people to keep you safe, then I'd do it."
"I don't understand." Your voice was almost a mumble.
"I agreed to do this before I met you but when I did, it all changed. I-I tried to convince them to stop. I wanted to try and be good—for you but she found out and threatened to kill you if I didn't continue with the plan so I did with the exception that they would leave you out of it," he explained softly. "I did this…for you."
You looked at him like he was insane (he kind of was). "You'd kill our friends?"
"If it meant that you'd be safe."
His words didn't completely register but when they did, you couldn't help but feel guilty. You had a crush on him for so long and here he was, basically confessing his love for you in such a fucked up way. You hated yourself for finding him even more attractive after hearing him say those words.
"Ethan…" you whispered his name.
"Can I kiss you?" he asked. "Can I please kiss you?"
You didn't give him an answer as you closed the space between the two of you.
It seemed wrong—no, it was wrong. Kissing him while he still wore the Ghostface robe, one that he wore while taking someone's life.
You knew he wasn't wearing this costume for fun. They only ever wore it for a purpose. Even though your mind was totally blanked because of how dumb his lips made you, when you pulled apart, you began to think about where he had come from and who he had just killed and why you weren't more concerned about the matter.
He chased after your lips, kissing you again with more force this time, even pulling you closer by the waist. You only pulled away because you were receiving a call.
You pulled your phone out from your pocket, the reality setting in when you saw Sam's contact. He looked down with you, not doing much in keeping you from answering. It took you a couple more seconds of contemplating until you decided to click the green button, putting the phone to your ear.
You took a deep breath before answering. "Hello?"
"Y/N, what the hell?!" Sam hollered into the speaker, her voice mixed with relief and annoyance. "Why weren't you answering? Are you okay?!"
"Yeah, I'm fine," you replied rather nonchalantly. "I had my phone off. What's wrong, Sam?"
There was a short beat. "Ghostface attacked us."
You furrowed your brows, glancing at Ethan. "What?"
"Yeah, he killed Quinn and…"
"And?" you repeated instantly. "Who else, Sam?"
"Anika…" Sam's voice was barely above a whisper. "Y/N, I'm so sorry. I-I tried to help her."
You shut your eyes, feeling tears starting to build. There was silence on the line and you were sure it was because Sam didn't want to say anything knowing you would be taking her death as personal as Mindy did.
Suddenly, your stab wounds began to throb which made you let out a grunt. You knew better than to cry over Anika only because it would achieve nothing. Yes, it was messed up that you were now standing in the room with her murderer, watching him undress himself of his black robe that he wore while killing her but you realized nothing you could've said or done—whether you got to him before she died—could've changed her outcome.
You watched him pull out a hunting knife from his back pocket, the silver glistening with dried blood. That blood probably belonged to Anika and Quinn. It made your throat go dry.
"Sam," you blurted quietly.
"What, Y/N?"
You were going to say it; tell her the truth. It was the right thing to do. Ethan, even if you liked him a lot, had just murdered your best friend and one of Sam's. They deserved the justice of their murderer being caught.
But when he walked back over to you, his eyes scanning your expression, you had already picked your choice.
"Y/N, what? Are you okay?" Sam's voice echoed in your mind.
"Yeah, yeah, it's just…" You tried to find the words. "Is everyone else okay? Did you get hurt?"
"We're fine. Mindy got cut but she's fine," Sam answered softly. "Can you come down here? I'd feel a lot better if you were here with us. Plus, I'm sure you can comfort Mindy than the rest of us. She doesn't want to be anywhere near Tara or Chad."
You let out a shaky breath. "Yeah. Ethan and I are on our way."
"Ethan?" she questioned.
"Yeah. Remember I told you I was going to meet him at his dorm? I was with him the whole night," you lied.
"Oh, okay." Sam sighed into the speaker. "That's good to hear, actually. Mindy thinks Ethan was the one behind all of this but if you were with him then it checks him out."
"Don't worry, Sam," you said. "We'll be there shortly."
"Okay, see you soon. Be safe."
You nodded, even though she couldn't see you and then hung up.
"You kept my secret?" Ethan asked.
You shook your head. "I shouldn't have. You killed Anika and Quinn."
He bit his lip, nodding calmly. "I know, I know. It wasn't exactly my first choice. But I had to for saving you the other night."
"Yeah, I know," you mumbled. "But did you mean it?"
"Mean what?" He furrowed his brows.
"What you said about wanting to be good?" You repeated his words. "Because that's the only reason I saved your ass. I should hate you. You killed Anika."
"Y/N/N," he said softly, walking over to grab your hands. "I only did this to protect you. They made me think my original motive was right but it's actually fucked up. I realized that the moment I met you. So, yes, I do mean it. And I'm sorry about Anika. I didn't really want to do it either."
You mulled over his words, looking down at your connected hands until you finally spoke. "Okay. Then, I'll help you," you informed him. "But, in order for me to do that, I need to know everything."
Let's just say it was an interesting conversation.
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callsignhood · 4 months
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König at a nightclub with you:
Tags: SFW / Headcanons / Fluff / König keeps his hood on / Mention of drink drugging but König protects you / You’re bit drunk
Instead of going to a club, he prefers to stay at home to relax. The idea of a crowded place with loud music is making his skin itch. But no matter where you go, he will come and follow.
House music is blasting from the speaker, you can feel the floor rumbling by the bass. Everywhere is dark with a purple undertone. He stays vigilant, a pair of eyes glancing across the dance floor. He is towering everyone else, and no one dares to approach you under his cold gaze and his threatening frame.
You drag König to the open bar to grab a drink, trying to loosen him up a little, but he refuses it. The music is so loud that he needs to hunch over a little by your ear. “Sorry Schatzi. Need to stay sober. Enjoy it for me, ja?” You smile and nod, sipping on your favourite drink.
If you leave your glass on the counter and someone tries to drug it, König will instantly grab their wrist and break a bone or two, pressing his palm on their mouth to muffle their scream and their pleading.
“Come here again and your throat will be the next thing to be broken, Scheißkerl. (Motherfucker)” König growls with his suppressed anger, eyes glaring at them like they’re already dead. He watches them run away in absolute fear, then he tells the bartender to make you another one. He acts like nothing has happened.
As you feel lightheaded by the alcohol, you pull König into the dance floor. He awkwardly laughs a little, trying to mimic your silly little dance moves, because he doesn’t want you to dance with a brick wall. He’s embarrassed, but by focusing on your smile, he slowly becomes more at ease.
He puts his hands on your waist, nodding to the music and dances with you. You’re glad that he’s enjoying this, and you pull his hood up to press a happy kiss on his lips.
König freezes for a second, face burning with surprise and embarrassment and love. He doesn’t pull his hood down yet, he nuzzles you a little and gives a kiss on your cheek. “Meine Liebe (My love) You smell like booze.” He smiles to you.
If you’re not feeling well, he will definitely walk you ou to a quieter spot, or even outside for fresh air. He hugs you gently, rubs his palm on your back. “It’s gonna be fine, just breathe. We can go somewhere else for a walk, then go home, ja?” You feel his warmth under his clothes. Comforting, safe, calming.
When you’re back at home/KorTac base/apartment, he teases you about your alcohol tolerance being bad. You cross your arms. “Not everyone can drink like you!” And he laughs more while putting your coat away.
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yutaleks · 1 month
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obsession is such an ugly word
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yuuta x female reader, length 5.2K CW: Yuuta's POV // yandere // alcohol // non-con groping/dry humping/somnophilia A/N: this is a repost from my previous blog, with some small edits. Banner by @/cafekitsune. Part of Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing
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Rage simmers beneath Yuuta's skin.
He's been good about it, about you. He did it all the right way: had you warm up to him, become friends, even spend time together outside of class. You shared the same major (after he switched, though you didn't know that), so it was easy to find that pretty smile of yours in every class he'd taken this year. He tried to do this naturally, to have you grow closer and closer to him until you'd never want to be apart.
That was his plan, anyway.
But you're stubborn. He likes that about you, but it's made things difficult.
"I'm sorry, Okkotsu-san." The formality stung. "I'm so busy with my studies... dating would be a distraction, you know? Can we just be friends, for now?"
For now. To anyone else that would signify a rejection, but to Yuuta it didn't. Your words for now meant you'd change your mind later, surely. Besides, you're the one who came crawling back just a couple days later. You couldn't stand to be apart for long, could you? See, he just had to be patient a little longer. 
Tonight’s the night he’s been waiting for: the semester’s over now. He’s going to ask you again to be his, now that your excuses have no merit. He’s been waiting for this ever since you rejected him. And true love is worth waiting forever for.
But he finds that being patient is hard when your cheeks are flushed with alcohol and he has to sit back and watch someone else try and make a move on you. He's been so good, so patient. And this classmate, someone so unimportant Yuuta can't even remember his name, he thinks he can earn your stubborn heart in one night?
The table you're currently sitting in hosts four: Maki sits closest to the wall, and you sit beside her. The seat across from Maki is empty; Nobara was here but left earlier in the night as she's leaving for the countryside, heading home to be with her family. She seemed to be rather eager to leave Yuuta's side, and it’s for the best. The feeling's mutual. 
It leaves Yuuta alone across from you, guarding the real estate at his side with his life, as he wants any chance at all to get some time alone with you. At least, he was guarding it with his life, until a certain pink-haired freshman showed up wanting to talk to you and you offered him the seat across from you, no care at all for Yuuta's unspoken plans with you.
"Kampai!" the voices of everyone at the tables around him shout in unison, yours included, everyone clinking together their beer glasses in the middle. Some graduating senior a couple of tables away had made a speech about the end of the semester, and his words were met with smiles from ear to ear. Yuuta doesn't join your cheer, too busy staring at you and steeping in his barely muted aggravation as he glares at his cheap beer bubbling gently in his mug. He’s starting to think he came to this stupid party for nothing.
But a sudden shout startles him from his thoughts.
"Okkotsu-kun!" His eyes widen as you shove your beer glass towards him, "Cheer up, won't you? You've been so quiet all night," a chuckle escapes your lips. "Well, quieter than normal. It's our last day, cmon. Toast with me!" 
"Yeah, Yuuta," Maki yells over the noise, "Stop being a stick in the mud."
He weakly holds out his glass, heart beating just a little bit faster as your beer glasses collide in the middle. The fact that you're thinking of him, including him in your fun... You're sweet to him, always. His grin grows wider as you pull back and take a swig, encouraging him with a wiggle of your brows to do the same.
You wipe your damp lips and giggle as Maki turns and says something to you, the rest of the bar way too loud for him to hear it. He looks back down at the piss-yellow beer in his glass, trying his hardest to focus and pick up on the sound of your conversation. But a loud voice interjects before he can hear you:
"Sempai!" the pink-haired annoyance beside him chimes in, leaning over the table at the izakaya to talk to you. It's the guy who's been trying to get your attention all night, a bright-eyed freshman who's very eager and, to Yuuta, incredibly brazen. Isn't it obvious from how much Yuuta sticks to your side and how much you smile around him that Yuuta's the only one for you? This freshman should be able to tell—everyone should.
It makes him sick.
"Half-way finished with uni," the freshman yells over the noise, a smile audible in his voice. “How does it feel?"
That's right, Yuuta remembers, this gathering is to celebrate the end of the semester. Yuuta never cared about these things, not before meeting you. To him tonight was an opportunity to get closer to you; he didn’t care what the actual reason for the gathering was.
You smile at the freshman. Yuuta tells himself it's different from the way you smile at him. Fake. Your eyes don’t twinkle the same, he tells himself. The confirmation calms the rolling boil of his blood, just a little.
"I'm glad," you nod, blinking up brightly at the freshman across from you. "Knowing you're halfway to the finish line is comforting, you know?"
Yuuta's gaze zeros in on your lips as you speak. You've put on lipstick tonight, a cherry red shade that looks shiny, pretty against your skin. You don’t normally wear such bright colors; you only did once, during a presentation, most days opting for that light blue little ball of chapstick you always use instead of any color. Maybe the fact that you wore a special lipstick meant that you had given this gathering just a little more importance. Is it cause he’s here? It must be.
As he stares, he wishes he could touch your lips, watch your lipstick smear and dull as it coats his lips, his fingers, his—
"What about you, Okkotsu-sempai?"
"I'm sorry?" He blinks out of his reverie, shakes his head as he wills the thoughts of you in compromising situations away. 
"You're halfway through too," the freshman smiles at him. Yuuta wonders who gave him the right to breathe. "You must be happy!"
"Not really," Yuuta starts. A frown forms on the other guy's face, a question evidently on his tongue as he bites his lip. Yuuta doesn't elaborate, turning back to take a sip on his beer.
"Okay then."
Maki laughs, "Itadori don't mind him, he's just being a dick."
"I know what will lighten you up, Okkotsu!" You're looking at him again with the goofy smile. You're tipsy at worst, sloshed at best, but he just finds this side of you endearing too.
He waves his hand, dismissing you with a soft smile. "I'm okay, don't worry about me, I—"
"Let's get some soju!"
***
"Soju was a bad idea."
It's Maki, who's just a little more than buzzed, that puts an end to your many rounds of drinks. Yuuta wasn't very interested in drinking, so he sipped on one shot-glass of soju for the evening, while you, Maki, and Itadori went toe-to-toe on shots of fruity alcohol. Maki's always had great endurance, alcohol included, but you and Itadori are nothing short of plastered. 
It turns out, Yuuta discovers just moments before the end of your drinking, that Itadori has a boyfriend. After downing the last shot of peach soju, Itadori's phone rings and he drunkenly answers with sobbing, whining professions of love to the owner of a dull, annoyed voice residing on the other side of the call. As Itadori's face falls down onto the wooden table, his phone slides out of his palm, and Yuuta gets a glance at the screen. It's a woman's name, Megumi, with a bunch of nonsensical emojis at the end. Yuuta doesn't pay much more attention to him after that—as long as he's not competition, Itadori's not worth thinking about anymore.
You however... you're leaning your head on Maki's shoulder, mumbling about how pretty you think Maki is. Yuuta doesn't want to have Maki on his bad side but he's certainly regretting letting her sit next to you right now, when that could've been him.
"Hey, wake up," Maki shakes your shoulder, and your head rolls with each gesture. "It's time to go home."
Your movements are slow and clumsy as you rise from the table. Itadori has Yuuta boxed in between the aisle and the wall, so he can't do much but watch as Maki helps you rise from your seat. 
"Time to go home," you say, your voice whispy and far-away. Maki props you up on her shoulder.
"I'll walk home with yo—"
"Wait!" Yuuta rises from the seat, pushing a sleeping Itadori out and onto the floor. The poor guy doesn’t even flinch and he tumbles onto the wood, slamming face-first against the grain. "I'll take her home." When Maki shoots him a look, he adds, “It's on the way for me. I don't mind it. Besides, you drank more than me, Maki."
Maki quirks a brow but trusts her friend. With eyes pointing down to the freshman, she says, “Okay. I’m close by here so I’ll keep an eye on the freshman till his boyfriend gets here. You get her home in one piece, alright?”
“Of course.”
Yuuta’s mood flips entirely, beaming as he dashes out of the izakaya and into the frigid February night with you in tow. How’d he get so lucky to be the one to walk you home? Maybe this insufferable gathering was worth it after all.
“Okkotsu-kuuuun,” you give his cold hand a healthy swing once you’re outside, walking down the street towards the closest train station. It’s a short subway trip to your apartment, but with how intoxicated you are, it’s best he gets you home safely.
“Careful,” he adjusts your linked hands, until your fingers are interlocked. He tucks you closer to his side when he feels how unbalanced you are. “You drank a little too much,”
“It’s okay,” you smile. Maybe it’s not so bad you’re drunk, since you’ve never smiled this much at him before. “You’re here, Okkotsu-kun.”
You trip over a piece of cracked concrete in the sidewalk and he catches you, pinning you to his chest. You stifle a giggle, something about the circumstances of it all is so silly to you. 
“You can’t walk,” Yuuta bends down, his hands coming together at his back. “Get on.”
“What if I’m heavy?”
“I’ll be fine. Get on.”
You take him up on his offer and sit on his back, wrapping your arms around his neck. His hands have a firm grip on your thighs. He’s stronger than you’d expect, having no issue at all balancing you on his back. A little hum of approval leaves your lips that makes Yuuta glad he’s put so much effort into being strong for you. 
The one thing that does make him feel a little weak is how much he loves your scent. You still smell just like strawberries, though it’s a little tainted with the smell of apple and peach liquor. He’d only ever gotten to smell you up close that one time in the library. And those other times when you’re not able to notice…
“Okkotsu-kun?”
“Yeah?”
“How do you know where I live?”
Oh, that’s right. You haven’t told him where you live before. He freezes for a moment, the seriousness in your voice a sudden change from the bubbly, sweet drunken drawl you’ve had for the last hour.
You add, “Did Nobara give you our address?”
“Yeah, that’s right.” He nods, and continues to walk with you in tow. “Before she left, in case you needed help getting home.”
“Mm… she’s such a good friend,” you smile, laying your head against the back of his. Your body goes limp, and Yuuta wonders if you’re about to fall asleep as he carries you home… he doesn’t mind, but a part of him wishes you weren’t so drunk. It’s rare for him to get a chance like this, and it hurts to feel like he’s wasting it as your deep breaths warm his neck.
***
When you both arrive to your apartment there’s an eerie stillness about the apartment complex, perhaps due to the time of night as well as the thin, cold air. You’re still passed out, sleeping on Yuuta’s back, when he fishes a key from the dirt in a nearby potted plant you keep on the steps to unlock your front door. When you wake he’ll smile when you ask how you got home; he’ll tell you he borrowed your keys. The walls that know the truth will silently harbor his secrets.
Yuuta doesn’t need to turn on the lights; he could maneuver this place blind if need be. 
He toes off his shoes at the small genkan, the tiles stretching perhaps just a couple of square feet. After closing the door, he shifts your weight on his back as he takes one large step over the tile (he wouldn’t dare be rude and drag in any dirt). Through the kitchen, around your small island, and two doors to the left is your bedroom. He takes you there, and lays you down flat upon your bedding. He takes off your shoes for you, and once you’re sleeping soundly in your bed he does a mad dash for the genkan, to leave your shoes there for you once you awaken. 
Yuuta returns just as quickly as he left, and with the moonlight that pours through your windows he observes your sleeping face. With lips parted you heave a heavy sigh, like a tired puppy sprawled upon a cushioned bed after a day of play. He debates whether he should change you out of your day clothes—he wonders if you would want to sleep in something more comfortable. You usually do; he recalls your pajamas of choice are a t-shirt and panties. Should he change you into that now?
The thought of taking off your clothes overwhelms him a little, excitement buzzing his synapses alive. 
The first thing to go is your socks. They are tiny little things, at least smaller than his own, cut low to the ankle. He slips them off with no protest at all from you, his thumbs gliding across the arch of your foot as if tracing it and committing it to memory. Briefly, Yuuta glances up at you, but the touch of his hands across your heel, and then your ankles, does nothing to affect your state of consciousness. Can he get away with all of it without disturbing you? It’s a little challenge he’s decided to embark, to see how far he can push it tonight.
With eyes focused entirely on your cherry lips, on the soft breath that flows in and out past your just slightly open mouth, he continues. You’re wearing a pair of jeans, which he unhooks at the button just below your midriff. It gives him just the smallest peek at your panties underneath, something dark and lacey that pops against your skin. He swallows the desire that pools under and around the frenulum beneath his tongue as he lowers your zipper. Yuuta tells himself he’s just helping you get comfortable. Truly, to him, this is the ultimate test of his patience. 
Long, chilled fingers hook themselves beneath your waistband at either side of your hips. He starts to tug down. Within seconds you begin to squirm and Yuuta freezes, afraid that you will wake up and find him in such a compromising scenario. Would you believe him if he said this was only to help you? His visage, that of a gentleman that is rooted so deeply in your memory, would it assure you in your moment of confusion, or would it be corrupted and shattered? would this be his undoing?
He doesn’t have to wonder for long because as soon as your jeans are past the widest point of your thighs, you’re back to being boneless against your bedding. Part of him expected a little more fight from you; he’d thought his favorite girl was a little more inclined to self-preservation. The thought is followed by the notion that you must be trusting of him, even subconsciously. He loves that about you, the faith in him that no one else has. You’re so trusting. He’ll protect your naivety, along with the other qualities of yours that he finds so endearing. Innocence that only he wishes to keep, that no one else will dare corrupt.
Your jeans pool at the ankles before Yuuta gently slips them down over your feet and off your body. The panties you wore tonight are one of those cheeky kind, giving him the loveliest image of the fullness of your thighs and the curve of your hips. Your body’s more beautiful up close than he could have imagined, and he lets himself drag an open hand up one of your thighs, to feel how soft and supple you are. A thumb slips under your panties, the edge that’s just at your hip bone, just to let himself feel… it’s so hard being this close. There’s so much he wants to do with you, to you, but he’s sure it will happen in time. He tells himself he’s a patient man as he salivates at the thought of ripping your panties off. 
He doesn’t. But he wants to.
Your sweater, which is both a little too tight and a little too revealing (for his taste), is another beast to tackle. Yuuta deliberates it for some time before deciding the risk of waking you if he were to take it off is too great. After much back and forth, he decides to leave it alone. 
He tries to stand up from the crouched position at the edge of the bed but he finds it’s very hard to stay away from you after even one touch. Curiosity has him brushing his fingers over your clothed midsection, tracing the dip in your waist, his thoughts running a mile a minute. You’re so soft, so very vulnerable. How many guys who had approached you had seen what he sees in you? The beauty in something as simple yet as divine as your body… whenever he thinks about it there’s an urge to gauge their eyes out. He’d done some damage with his fists but it wasn’t permanent, so it wasn’t enough. 
His fingers shake a little as they approach the apex between your thighs. His lips part and brows furrow in concentration; fingertips just barely kissing the dark fabric that clings to your skin. It’s so warm, and the patch at the center has just the slightest hint of dampness. A middle finger glides between clothed puffy lips, first over the hood, then over a dipping point, what must be your entrance. Your breath hitches as he presses just a little harder. He wants to taste it—no, he needs to.
You whimper a little when he pushes just a bit too hard. He pulls away instantly, and the breath he’d been holding exits his body, the strain in his shoulders flowing out in waves. His jeans feel uncomfortably tight. Look at what you did, with just one single sound. He’s never been more excited; to know that even a single sound that left your mouth was entirely his doing drives him mad.
The finger that he had pressed against your clothed pussy now presses against his tongue. He doesn’t taste anything, to his disappointment.
He wants to satiate this need that boils in the pit of his stomach but, at least in this small moment of clarity, he thinks he can try to wait for a day when he will get your permission. He is patient, after all. 
Yuuta, in his frenzy to distract himself from your body warming the bed sheets in front of him, chooses to focus on the state of your bedroom. It’s a place that, at least to your knowledge, he’s never seen before.
It is in what he would consider to be a state of below-average cleanliness. This does not come as a surprise to him, and luckily with your state of consciousness (or rather, lack thereof), he does not expend the effort to pretend to be shocked. 
Despite the fact that finals have come and gone, the floor closest to the wall is littered with open textbooks and notebooks covered in haphazard scrawl. Clothes bulge out from your closet across from the bed, dark and light fabrics alike poking through the spaces between the slats, as if you had way too much clothes and not enough space nor enough of a care to organize it all. In the corner, just beside the entry door, is a wicker basket overflowing with laundry: among the articles are pair of jeans shoved into the edge; a sweater with a sleeve hanging out, reaching for your door knob to hide your mess; and panties, so many panties. Some patterned, with florals or little animals, and others cheeky, thin little strings that barely constitute cloth garments at all. The thought of you wearing such a little thing, barely an excuse for clothing at all, stirs something in him, something fierce and heady brewing between his thighs. Had you worn that around him? Have you ever thought of him taking it off of you? He’s thinking about it; thinking about it with such excruciating detail it makes his body sweat.
As he enters a staring contest with the pile of panties, he stops to consider the situation he finds himself in. You’re drunk, and the last thing that would curry favor with you would be to take advantage of you, so he shoves that away to the recess of his mind. You believe him to be a gentleman. So a gentleman he shall be.
But that doesn’t mean he can’t poke around.
He rummages through your laundry and he plucks out a few of your panties from the pile. Under the beam of moonlight, he looks them over: they must be at least a few days old, as they are no longer flimsy and fresh, just a little stiff. As if at one point they had been warm and wet, but no longer so. They’re soiled and dried out after sitting in your laundry. He picks the one he judges to be the worst offender. It’s a cute one—lacy at the edges, cotton in the middle.
He bunches it up in his fist. Then, he lifts it to his face. When Yuuta brings the wad of fabric to his nose he takes a long inhale, a satisfied moan threatening to break past his lips. He loves you so wholly and unconditionally, including the scent of your sex that lingers on your laundry. Especially so.
It’s not wrong if he does it out of love is it? It’s not disgusting if it’s love, right?
He tells himself so as he fills his nostrils with your scent, aroused by your discarded underwear like a fucking dog. He hovers over your laundry basket, forehead pressed against the wall, the tent in his jeans becoming more and more pressing of an issue to fix. 
“Look at what you do to me,” he sighs, breath warming the panties that he keeps pressed to his face. He knows you can’t hear him. But he wants you to look. He wants you to see him, see how desperately and ardently he feels for you.
His free hand makes quick work of his jeans—he snaps the button open with his index and thumb, and then soon after works the zipper down. His open palm snakes down, under the waistband of his boxers, and tugs on his length to alleviate his erection, even a little. 
As he takes another breath from behind the veil of your dirty underwear, he pumps at his cock. He does it slowly, savoring the moment he can finally get so close with you still in the room. 
Can you see him? Do you see how much he wants you?
Yuuta, despite what he believes, is not, in fact, a creature of patience. Within a few strokes he hears you sigh and he turns around to face you. You look so pretty on your bed in those cute little panties and that deep-cut shirt. So pretty. 
Suddenly, fucking his fist in the corner of your room facing away from you isn’t enough for him anymore. He’s so close to you, can’t he just get a little closer? He just wants to see your pretty face. He’ll apologize later. You’ll love him, so you’ll forgive him.
Yuuta moves towards your bed, on something that feels like instinct. Crawls onto your bed slowly, his breath balled in his throat as you sleep soundly. You barely flinch as the mattress dips and creaks with each slow shuffle of his knees. In one fist is your balled up panties, pressed just to the side of your head, holding up his weight. His knees are at either side of your hips as he hovers over you, caging you in like an animal of prey. 
All he can focus on is your face. 
Yuuta uses his free hand to swipe at your lips with his thumb, messing up the remnants of your red lipstick. He’d been wanting to do that all night, to smear the color along your skin until your natural lip color pokes through. You’re naturally so pretty—you don’t need any embellishments, not around him. But it does look quite beautiful all smeared, when it’s a mess made by his design…
He then takes his hand and cradles your jaw, moves it to the side, just enough so your sleeping face is facing his own. So he can look at you, so you can look at him too.
Just like that…
He imagines this will be his view the first time he’ll fuck you. 
You haven’t told him, but he knows you’re a virgin, so you’ll probably want him to be gentle. To be soft, just like this. To take the lead, to tell you “you’re so beautiful” just as he whispers it to you now. To move his hips slowly, let you adjust to him—just as he does now, rutting his clothed cock against your tummy. He does it with a lethargic, purposeful grind of his hips.
This is exactly how you will want it. He knows you. He knows you’ll love this. He knows you’ll love him.
You move a bit below him, stretching out a leg, and it lowers his cock to just above your panties. He wasn’t going to go that far, he only wanted to see you, to feel you. 
What a good girl—you want it too, don’t you?
With dark eyes focused entirely on your expressions, especially the soft little grin on your lips, he grinds his hips against your own once more. He moans when the tip of his cock catches on your clit, and feels a sudden drop in his stomach when your eyes twitch below closed eyelids. He needs to find a way to be quieter…
The panties in his balled fist are promptly shoved in his mouth, self-inflicted in an effort to quiet down/ To remain the gentleman you believe him to be. And he doesn’t mind it, actually. He even sucks on it, right on that stiff double-cotton lining in the center where he knows your pussy once was. A muffled noise leaves his lips as the tangy taste hits his tongue. 
He wishes he could taste the real thing, and imagines what kind of noises you’ll make when he does.
Another push and pull of his hips, and the pleasure he feels from just rutting against your clothed pussy is overwhelming. Would he even be able to hold back when he’s inside you? What kind of incredible feeling will sex be, when just rutting on you with clothes on it feels this good?
He stops thinking too hard about this and just lets himself feel. The fabric between the two of you gets wetter with every passing minute, pre-cum leaking from his cockhead and staining your panties. His teeth gnaw hard on the fabric, drool seeping through with every labored breath. He feels as if everything were soaking wet as he’s drowning in pleasure. And he loves this feeling, wants more more more.
Something happens, then, that has never happened in all the nights he’s watched you dream. As he humps your cunt through the fabric, pushing himself closer to the brink, he hears you whimper out “Yuuta”. In the state he’s in he doesn’t question it at all; his cock catches on your hole, just between the folds of your pussy, and he comes in his boxers pressed right against your sex with a broken moan muffled by your soaked panties in his mouth. What a sorry sight to see.
He rolls himself off of you and spits out your panties into the floor. As you turn over in your sleep he lays in your bed beside you, panting and blinking at your ceiling. Did that really just happen? Did he really get to come so close to you, right on your body, right when you said his name? 
He wonders if its possible to love you any more than he does right now.
Yuuta’s grinning like a fool as you lull back into deeper sleep again, your body turned to its side and facing away from him. His boxers and jeans are soaked through, and his chin and pelvis are sticky, but he has not a single care in the world.
Why would he care about anything else, when it’s so clear to him that he has you now? 
He buttons his pants closed and turns on your bed, to face your back. Once he’s no longer panting, emboldened by what just happened, he slides just a little closer to you. He won’t be able to sleep, not when just being in your presence alone makes his body feel electrified. So instead, he will watch you sleep. 
He slides an arm around your midsection, and curiously touches your panties with one of his fingers. It’s so wet, stained and soaked with his cum. 
He’s left his mark on you, for once.
He sticks that finger in his mouth again, as he had done earlier in the night. This time, he tastes himself. And he tastes you.
Satisfied, he lays beside you, and prepares for a long night of bliss.
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norrussell · 2 months
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Home | George Russell⁶³
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Pairings: George Russell x fem!bestfriend!reader
Word count: 8316
Summary: it's been a week since George and you separated. One night he unexpectedly returns, but has enough time passed for everything to go back to normal?
Warnings: angst angst angst, fluff, more angst, but then even more fluff
A/N: Finallyyyyyy part 5 is here!!!! First of all, I want to thank everyone for reading, following, sharing, loving and supporting this mini series. I've had the time of my life writing this, something that's been brewing inside me for too long and I'm happy this platform allowed me to share it and for it to be so well received. Even if some of you called me evil for the things in part 4, but hey, I tried to make the plot interesting and unpredictable as much as I could. It would be boring if everything always ended in the same way, would it not? With that being said, I hope I manage to buy your forgiveness for the awful things in this FINAL part of bsf!George series! ♥♥♥ P.S. This song was a great inspoooo, you can thank it for getting this part
Previous part
George wasn’t mad at you. No, he was mad at himself. Mad at how his heart had betrayed him and at how he had let himself fall for someone he knew he couldn’t have. He should’ve been better at taking care of you last night, at keeping his feelings in check. He couldn't believe that he had let his feelings spill out like that, knowing deep down that it might push you away. And alcohol was no excuse. He just should’ve known better.
He stepped out of the building, the cold morning air biting at his skin, and walked towards his car, his mind filled with you. He couldn't bear to look up, couldn't bear to see the window where you stood, the image of your pained expression etched in his mind. George clenched his fists, fighting back the tears threatening to spill over once again. He had never felt so helpless, so lost.
His hands gripped the steering wheel tightly, his knuckles turning white. He tried to steady his breathing as he replayed the scene in his mind over and over again. The look of shock on your face, the pain in your eyes as you pushed him away. How could he have been so foolish to think that confessing his love would solve everything? It only complicated things further, driving a wedge between the two of you.
“Dammit!” he hit the steering wheel out of frustration. He wanted to run back and knock on your door, to beg for a chance to make things right, to plead with you to give him another opportunity. But he knew deep down that he had to respect your space, your need for time to sort through your emotions. He couldn't bear the thought of causing you more pain by being any more selfish and demanding your immediate attention.
And there was no time either. Race week had started and he had to go home and pack if he meant to catch the evening flight. The further he drove from your apartment the more he felt like he was getting away from a future he had allowed himself to envision with you.
When he finally reached his apartment, he sat in his car for what felt like an eternity, staring blankly ahead. The thought of packing for the race seemed inconsequential now, a triviality in the face of the emotional storm raging inside him. But he knew he had to keep moving forward, even if every fiber of his being wanted to turn back and fight for you.
The apartment felt empty and cold, mirroring the ache in his chest. He mechanically packed his bags, his movements robotic as he tried to push down the torrent of feelings threatening to overwhelm him. The sweater you had borrowed from him lay crumpled on the bed, a painful reminder of what had transpired between you.
As George zipped up his suitcase, he paused, his hand hovering over the sweater. With a determined glint in his eyes, he picked it up and folded it carefully, tucking it into a corner of his bag. It was a small reminder of you, a piece of him that he couldn't bear to leave behind. It was the second best thing if you don’t show up on the track like it was planned as well.
The drive to the airport was a blur, the city passing by in a haze as George wrestled with his inner turmoil. Should he have fought harder? Should he have just left without a fight? The questions swirled in his mind, each one stabbing at his heart like a jagged knife.
He barely remembered checking in for his flight, the motions automatic and distant. The loudspeaker announcements and bustling crowds at the airport seemed to fade into the background as he found his seat on the plane and as the engines roared to life, propelling the aircraft down the runway, George's mind was still consumed by thoughts of you.
The plane ascended into the sky, leaving behind the city where his heart remained tangled with yours. He stared out of the window, watching the landscape below shrink into miniature shapes. The distance between him and you grew with each passing second, yet he couldn't shake off the feeling that a part of him was left behind, anchored to you.
The flight attendant interrupted his reverie, offering him a drink with a polite smile. George instinctively accepted, taking a sip of the lukewarm coffee but hardly registering its taste. His mind was a whirlwind of emotions, regret and longing mingling with uncertainty about what the future held for him and for you.
He made a silent promise to himself, a promise to give you all the space you needed while also holding onto hope for a future where your paths might converge once again.
-
You spent the whole week thinking. Wondering. Realizing. You barely left your apartment or moved from that one spot on your couch. You couldn’t enter your bedroom without being reminded of George, the memories of his presence lingering in every corner. The faint scent of his cologne still clung to the air, a painful reminder of the intimacy you had shared.
It wasn’t just your bedroom. Your whole apartment was full of him. Starting from the clothes that were piling up every time you had borrowed something and never returned. They were now neatly folded in his section of your closet.
The books he lent you, with his notes scribbled in the margins, were scattered on the coffee table. You picked up one of them, running your fingers over his handwriting, feeling a pang of nostalgia for the easy camaraderie you shared. But now, everything felt tainted by the confession he had made, by the emotions that had spilled out into the open and shattered the already fragile balance between you.
In the kitchen, he had his mug he always used and you didn't let anyone else touch it. “It is George's mug,” you would say. At the time you didn't think anything of it, but was it normal that friends had such possession over each other's items? Not that you were just friends, though, were you? The events of that night had made it abundantly clear that there was a depth to your relationship that extended beyond mere friendship. But where did that leave you now? Confusion clouded your thoughts, making it hard to see a way forward.
Maybe the worst part was that he even had his own toothbrush in your bathroom. How often did he crash that he–or you–needed to buy one? Next to it was his razor. No, that was definitely the worst. He shaves almost every morning and you found yourself wondering how many times had he stood in your bathroom, meticulously shaving before a big race, the sound of the blade scraping against his skin, a familiar background noise in your shared space? How many mornings had you watched him from the doorway, a warm feeling blooming in your chest at the sight of him so vulnerable yet so achingly familiar? It was a mundane yet intimate act that now felt like a distant memory, a relic of a time when things were simpler between you.
The realization that George had seamlessly become a part of your daily routine hit you like a ton of bricks. How could you go back to your normal life without him now that he had made himself so at home in your space?
The signs. They were all over. And you were blind. Too blind. Maybe even deliberately so. Standing there, you realized it was like you did everything backwards. First it was like he lived there, was your lover, friend and now a stranger. Isn't it how it always ends though? Ultimately with every ending, a person you part with becomes a stranger. Maybe not literally so, but the person you knew turns into someone you don't recognize anymore and that's what leads to a break up.
Not that you and George were completely over, far from it, but that's what happened when he confessed his love. You couldn't recognize him as your friend anymore. That wasn't your friend, couldn't be.
You moved through your apartment like a ghost, your steps heavy with the weight of sorrow. Every corner held a piece of George, a piece of the life you had built together without even realizing it. How could you have been so blind to the depth of his feelings for you? How could you have missed the signs that now seemed glaringly obvious in hindsight?
The toothbrush in the bathroom seemed to mock you, a symbol of the intimacy that had grown between you and now lay shattered at your feet. Frowning, you went to the kitchen and pulled out a cardboard box out of your pantry. You started shoving each and every of his belongings into it.
The once familiar space of your apartment now felt foreign and cold, stripped of the warmth and comfort that George had brought into it. You couldn't bear to look at the empty spot in the closet where his clothes used to hang or the blank space on the coffee table where his books had once been. It was as if he had never been there at all, as if all of it had been nothing but a figment of your imagination.
You sealed the box shut and left it by the front door. You’ll send the stuff back. Or throw them away if he doesn’t want them. Either is good. But not just yet. You wanted to hold onto them just for a little while longer. You sat on the floor next to it, buried your face in your hands and finally allowed yourself to cry.
-
George busied himself with media stuff and training. His days were a whirlwind of interviews and practice sessions, leaving no solitary moment to spend lost in thought. He threw himself into his work and training with a fervor that bordered on obsession. Every spare moment was filled with activity, leaving no room for the thoughts of you that threatened to consume him. Or so he thought.
“Okay, that’s it.” his trainer announced. “We’re done for today.”
“Aw man, I was just in the zone,” George protested, a bead of sweat trailing down his forehead.
“I don’t know what zone you were in, but you were definitely not focused. Your mind is somewhere else today. Like it was yesterday, and the day before.” the trainer replied, eyeing George with a knowing look. “I need you here, present.”
“Don't know how much more present I can be, I am literally here,” George frowned.
“Physically you are, but I need you mentally,” the trainer said and touched the side of George’s head. “I don’t mind training with you twice or even three times a day, but it’s obvious you’re running away from something.”
George's facade cracked, a flicker of vulnerability betraying the stoic mask he wore. He knew he couldn't keep up the charade any longer, not with his trainer's penetrating gaze boring into him. With a heavy sigh, he slumped down on a nearby bench, running a hand through his sweat-dampened hair.
“I told her,” he confessed, the words tumbling out like a dam breaking. “I told her how I felt, and she... I don’t know how to fix it.”
His trainer sat down next to him, a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “So you finally confessed.”
“I didn’t mean to. It just slipped. We were having a fight because-”
“Because?”
He stopped, the memories flooding back in a rush. The fight replayed in his mind like a broken record, the sharp words and raw emotions still fresh in his heart. He took a deep breath, steeling himself before continuing.
“We got drunk and did something we shouldn’t have. We, uh, slept together. And it's not just that. There were things that happened even before...”
He felt his trainer's gaze studying him, waiting for the rest of the story. George hesitated, unsure if he should reveal more. But the words spilled out before he could stop them.
“It wasn’t just a mistake, though,” George admitted, his voice laced with regret. “I’ve been in love with her for a while now, you know that. I thought maybe she felt the same way, but when I told her...” He trailed off, unable to articulate the ache in his chest.
“She pushed me away,” George revealed, his voice barely a whisper. “Told me she didn’t see us that way. And now everything is so messed up between us. I don’t know how to fix it.”
“But she didn’t call it a mistake, did she?” His trainer's question hung in the air, heavy with meaning. George looked up, his eyes meeting the trainer's intense gaze.
“No, she didn’t,” George replied, a hint of confusion in his voice. “She just...said we needed space. That she needed space.”
His trainer nodded thoughtfully, absorbing George’s words. “Sometimes, space is what’s needed to gain a better perspective on things.”
George let out a heavy sigh, rubbing his temples as if trying to ease the tension that coiled within him. “I just can’t shake this feeling that I’ve ruined everything. That I’ve lost her completely.”
“You haven’t lost her, George,” the trainer reassured him, his tone firm yet gentle. “Sometimes, taking a step back is what you both need to figure things out. Give her the space she asked for, but don’t lose hope. Love has a way of finding its way back to where it belongs.”
George looked up at his trainer, gratitude shining in his eyes. “I’m sorry to burden you with all this. Thank you for listening.”
“Don’t apologize, G, that’s what I’m here for. Not only to care about your body, but also your mind.” The trainer patted George on the back, a reassuring smile on his face. “It’s good to get it all out in the open. Now that you’ve told her how you feel, the ball is in her court. Give her some time to process everything, and in the meantime, focus on yourself. You can’t control how she feels or what she decides to do, but you can control how you handle this situation.”
George nodded, the weight on his shoulders feeling a little lighter with his trainer’s words of wisdom.
“Now go back to your room, take a shower, relax. And remember, this too shall pass. Tomorrow is a big day and she would like you to do good.”
George nodded in understanding once more, a sense of calm finally settling over him.
-
You never had to face any challenges alone. You always had George by your side and together, you could conquer anything. But now he turned into one of those challenges and you had to figure it out on your own. You knew deep down that the space was necessary, that you both needed time to think this through and figure out what you truly wanted in order to move on.
The familiar sounds of the city outside your window seemed to echo the turmoil in your heart. Each passing day felt like an eternity as you grappled with the weight of your decisions and the ache of George's absence.
You found yourself reaching for your phone multiple times throughout the day, your thumb hovering over his contact name before pulling back at the last second. You wanted to call him, to hear his voice and to mend the broken pieces between you two. But something always held you back. Not just yet.
You busied yourself with mundane tasks to distract yourself from thoughts of George, but his absence lingered like a ghost in every corner of your home.
A notification went off on your phone, reminding you of the race weekend approaching. If everything were right, you would be packing your bags and catching a flight and not choking on your tears in the living room, clutching your phone. The reminder only served to intensify the whirlwind of emotions already swirling inside you. You should’ve been there with him, cheering him on and supporting him through the highs and lows of the weekend. But now, the distance between you felt insurmountable, a chasm of uncertainty and unspoken words.
You missed him more than words could express, more than tears could convey.
On Saturday, you turned the TV on and watched the qualifying session even though you promised you wouldn’t. It would only torture you more. But you felt obligated to support him even from a distance, thinking that maybe, just maybe, he would feel the warmth of your encouragement seeping through the miles that separated you.
The cars raced around the track, their engines roaring like thunder in the distance. You couldn't help but watch, your heart heavy with a mix of longing and regret. Each turn they took on the screen mirrored the twists and turns of your own emotions, the unpredictability of the future weighing heavily on your mind.
As you watched the cars speed by, a flash of black caught your eye. It was George's car, unmistakable even from a distance. Your heart leaped into your throat as you saw him maneuvering through the pack with skill and determination. Despite everything that had transpired between you, a part of you still held out hope for a future where you two could find your way back to each other.
But now, as you watched him from afar, a sense of regret gnawed at you. You should have been there beside him, sharing in his triumphs and soothing his defeats. Instead, you were stuck in this limbo of unreliability and self-reflection.
The qualifying session seemed to pass in a blur, the cars flashing by like ghosts on the screen, but George’s final lap had you holding your breath. When his time flashed on the screen, you let out a heavy sigh. It was a good time, but not good enough to qualify on the front. You couldn’t help but think that maybe if you had been there, things would have turned out differently. A pang of guilt tugged at your heart as you watched George’s disappointed expression on the screen. You wanted to reach out to him, to comfort him, but you knew it was impossible.
You turned the TV off. The weight of your decision to give each other space settled deeper in your chest as you stared at the blank screen, the remnants of George's image still burned in your mind. The silence of your apartment felt stifling, suffocating you with its emptiness. You knew that you needed to make a decision soon, to either reach out to George and try to mend what was broken or to continue down this path of separation and solitude.
The following day, you woke up with a heaviness in your chest. It was race day. Would George be able to focus on the race with everything that had transpired between you two? Would he be thinking of you as he navigated each turn and straightaway? Is he even thinking of you?
As the race time drew near, you found yourself pacing around the apartment, unable to sit still. Your phone lay on the coffee table, silent and untouched. In normal circumstances, you would send him a message of encouragement, a simple "Good luck" to let him know you were thinking of him. But now, the words stuck in your throat. You didn’t want to give him false hope in case you needed more time before you finally talk. No, it was better this way.
The sound of the commentator's voice filled the room, announcing the start of the race. You couldn't bring yourself to look at the TV this time, the thought of watching George out on the track without you by his side in this situation too painful to bear. Instead, you stood by the window, staring out at the city below as if searching for some semblance of clarity in its bustling streets.
Minutes felt like hours as you waited, each passing second heavy with anticipation and anxiety. Finally, the roar of engines reached a crescendo, signaling the end of the race. Your heart raced alongside them, unsure of what news awaited you.
You turned to the TV, your hands trembling as you searched for George's name amidst the list of racers. When you finally found it, your heart dropped. He was in the top 10, he scored points, but you knew it was not the result he wanted.
You couldn't help but feel responsible, as if it was your decision to give each other space that had kept you both from achieving satisfaction and now you had to live with the consequences. A tear rolled down your cheek as you thought about what could have been if you had chosen a different path.
In the quiet moments that followed, you realized that you had set yourself on this course of action alone, but you had no idea where it would lead. You needed to take a deep breath and figure out what you wanted from this arrangement, and whether it was possible to have the life you both deserved with each other.
-
You were getting ready for bed and it was around midnight when you heard a knock on your door. You frowned, thinking who could it possibly be at this late hour or if to even open at all. With cautious steps, you made your way to the door, a sense of apprehension tightening your chest. As you reached for the doorknob, you paused, gathering your courage before swinging the door open.
You expected a neighbor, or anyone else, but standing before you, illuminated by the dim light filtering in from the hallway, was George. His usual confident demeanor was replaced by a vulnerability you had never seen before. His eyes, usually bright, now held a mixture of sadness and longing as they met yours.
“I could’ve gone to my apartment, but it is cold and empty and I wanted to… come home.” George's voice was barely above a whisper, the words heavy with emotion.
You stood there, stunned by his unexpected presence, unsure of what to say or how to react. The air between you crackled with unspoken words and unresolved feelings, the tension palpable in the space that separated your bodies.
“But I see now that was a mistake. You clearly—” but as he reached to take his bag, you stepped forward and wrapped your arms around him, catching him off guard.
“You’re home,” you murmured against his chest, holding him tighter.
George hesitated for a moment, unsure of how to respond to your embrace. But as he felt the warmth of your arms around him, the weight on his shoulders seemed to lift, and he slowly returned the hug. The barriers that had kept you apart for so long melted away in that single embrace, leaving behind a sense of relief and an unspoken promise of forgiveness.
“I missed you,” you choked out, your voice barely audible. “I missed you so much, George.”
His response was to hold you tighter, as if trying to erase the distance and time that had separated you.
“I missed you too,” George whispered, his voice shaking with tears he was holding back. “I missed you every single day.”
The silence that enveloped you was no longer suffocating but comforting, a space where words were no longer necessary to convey the depth of your feelings for each other.
After what felt like an eternity, George finally pulled back slightly, his eyes searching yours for any sign of hesitation or doubt. But all he found was a deep-rooted affection and a silent plea for a fresh start.
“Come in,” you finally said, whipping away little tears and moving aside.
George stepped inside, his eyes never leaving yours as if searching for any hint of uncertainty. As he walked further into the apartment, you couldn't help but notice how the dim light from the hallway accentuated the lines of weariness on his face, lines that spoke of sleepless nights and unanswered questions.
You led him to the living room, both of you enveloped in a cocoon of silence that felt both heavy and fragile. George sat down on the arm chair, his hands fidgeting with the straps of his bag, while you perched on the edge of the couch, unsure of what to say or do next.
“Are you hungry? I can make you something quickly—”
“No need,” George interrupted, his voice soft yet firm. You nodded, another silence falling among you.
“No offense, George, but you look awful,” you couldn't help but blurt out, the words slipping from your lips before you could stop them. George's head shot up, surprise flickering in his tired eyes, before a hint of amusement crept in.
“I haven’t slept in days, y/n,” he replied as he leaned his head back and closed his eyes.
A pang of guilt twinged in your chest at his admission, but also relief that you weren’t the only one having nights with little to no sleep.
“I understand,” you said softly. George nodded, his expression a mix of exhaustion and relief at being back in your presence.
“You know what I’m the most tired of?” he didn’t wait for your answer. “Being apart from you.” he opened his eyes and met yours.
Tears welled up in your eyes at George's heartfelt confession, his words echoing the sentiments you had been carrying in your own heart all this time. You reached out a trembling hand to brush a lock of hair away from his face, your fingertips lingering on his cheek as if trying to memorize the feel of his skin.
“I’m sorry for what I put us both through—”
George placed a finger against your lips, silencing your apology. “Y/n,” he called, his tone warning. “I’m tired.” his eyes darted to your lap and then back to your eyes again and you understood.
“Okay,” you said softly. “We’ll talk in the morning. Come here now.” you pulled yourself on the couch and patted your thighs, making room for him to lay and rest his head on your lap.
You ran your fingers through his hair, the simple act bringing a sense of peace and familiarity that had been missing in both your lives for more than long.
In the soft glow of the lamp beside the couch, you sat together in silence, the rhythmic pattern of your fingers against his scalp creating a soothing lullaby that seemed to calm the storm raging within both of you.
“Did you watch the race?” he murmured.
"Yes, I did," you replied softly, your voice barely above a whisper. "I watched it all."
George let out a heavy sigh, the weight of his exhaustion evident in the slump of his shoulders. "So you saw me messing up," his voice tinged with regret.
You continued to run your fingers through his hair, offering him comfort in your touch. “You didn't mess up. You did well, George. Top 10 is nothing to be disappointed about. I’m proud of you.”
A small smile tugged at the corners of his lips as he closed his eyes, basking in the comfort of your touch. “I wanted more,” he admitted softly, a hint of frustration seeping into his words.
You smiled, somehow finding it unusual he wanted to make a small talk out of his race. He never wanted to do that if he wasn’t satisfied with the results. But everything was better than talking about you two at the moment, you guessed.
“You always want more, George,” you replied, a teasing lilt in your voice. “But you gave it your all out there. That’s what matters,” you reassured him, your voice gentle and soothing.
George let out a contented sigh, his body relaxing against yours. The weight of the past seemed to lift off his shoulders with each passing moment spent in your embrace. He turned his head slightly, looking up at you with a mix of gratitude and longing in his eyes. "Thank you for letting me come back," he whispered.
A wave of tenderness washed over you as you gazed down at him, seeing the vulnerability and sincerity in his expression. Without a word, you leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to his forehead, a silent promise of forgiveness and understanding.
As George closed his eyes, a sense of peace settled between you, the weight of past grievances slowly lifting.
“Tell me what you did without me. I want to listen to your voice,” he said, his words trailing off as sleep began to claim him.
You smiled softly, a warmth spreading through your chest at his request. But how were you to tell him about all the days spent missing him, about the hollow ache in your chest that only his presence could fill, about the countless moments when a simple sight or sound would bring back memories of him flooding into your mind. How could you convey the depth of your longing, the way his absence had left a void in your life that no amount of distractions could fill? How were you to tell him that the most you’ve done in the week was pack his things in a cardboard box that was still by the door?
But you knew George needed to rest, to find solace in the peaceful refuge you offered him. So, you began recounting mundane details of your days, from the way the sun cast golden hues through the windows in the mornings to the sound of rain tapping against the roof on lonely nights. You spoke of small victories and minor setbacks, all the while keeping your voice soft and soothing as he drifted off into a much-needed slumber.
As George's breathing evened out, you continued to stroke his hair gently, feeling the rise and fall of his chest against your thighs. The apartment was quiet, the only sound was the soft hum of the refrigerator in the kitchen.
You leaned back against the couch, your thoughts swirling with memories of the time you had spent apart. The ache of missing him had been a constant companion, a dull throb in your heart that no amount of distraction could alleviate. And now that he was here, lying in your lap once more, you were at a loss for how to bridge the gap that had formed between you. But that will have to wait till morning.
With a heavy sigh, you shifted slightly on the couch, careful not to disturb George, and closed your eyes.
-
A motion woke you. You were moving, but not of your own volition. As consciousness slowly seeped back into your mind, you realized that the movement was not yours alone. Someone was carrying you, their arms wrapped securely around your body. Confusion and fear jolted through you as you tried to make sense of the situation.
Opening your eyes, you found yourself met with darkness. The soft glow of the lamp by the couch was nowhere to be seen, leaving you disoriented in the black void surrounding you. The arms holding you tightened slightly, a silent reassurance in their grip.
"George?" you whispered, the word barely audible even to your own ears. A shiver ran down your spine as the silence stretched on, broken only by the sound of footsteps echoing in the dark.
A voice, deep and familiar, cut through the void. "It's me," George whispered, his warm breath tickling your ear. You could feel his heart beating steadily against your back as he carried you towards the bedroom.
You wanted to protest, to insist that he didn’t have to go through the trouble, but the comfort of his embrace and the rhythmic sway of his movements lulled you into compliance. You buried your face in the crook of his neck, breathing in his familiar scent that brought a sense of peace unlike anything else.
Before you knew it, you found yourself being laid down gently on the soft bed.
"I'm sorry for waking you," he whispered, his voice tinged with regret. "I just couldn't bear to leave you there on the couch."
You reached out a hand to find him in the darkness, intertwining your fingers with his as a silent reassurance that it was alright.
“Stay with me,” you breathed.
George's hand tightened around yours, his touch grounding you. “No, let’s not repeat past…” he trailed off, not wanting to call it a mistake. “I’ll sleep on the couch.”
“Then let me sleep on the couch, you can stay here—” you insisted, the words slipping out before you could second-guess them. You sat up, the covers pooling at your waist, and made to move off the bed. But George’s hand on your arm stopped you, his touch gentle yet firm.
“No,” he murmured, his voice holding a note of determination that brooked no argument. “I’ll be fine. Go back to sleep.” he kissed your forehead and left the room.
-
You woke up to the first light of dawn filtering in through the curtains, casting a soft glow over the room, the events of the previous night almost feeling dreamlike. That’s when your eyes shot up and you bolted upright in bed, the bed sheets slipping off your body as you stumbled out of bed and ran to the living room almost tripping over your two feet.
You leaned against the doorframe and breathed a sigh of relief as you spotted him sleeping still on your couch. It wasn’t a dream. He was really there. Silently, you made your way over to him and sat down in the arm chair beside the couch.
You took in the sight of him. He was sleeping on his stomach with mouth slightly parted, stretched out with his whole length that his feet were dangling over the armrest. His hair was tousled, and the early morning light painted a golden hue over his features, highlighting the faint stubble on his jawline and the way his eyelashes swept against his cheeks.
The blanket he found was too short to cover his whole frame and the decorative pillow he used as a makeshift headrest had slid slightly to the side. You couldn’t help but smile at the sight, a surge of affection welling up inside you as you watched him sleep so peacefully.
For a moment, you allowed yourself to simply be in his presence, to take in the quiet intimacy of this shared space. The distance that had seemed insurmountable in the past now felt like a small gap waiting to be bridged. With each rise and fall of George’s chest, you felt a renewed sense of hope blooming within you.
“… You’re staring.” George murmured without opening his eyes.
You immediately turned away, a blush creeping in. “I was not.”
“I could feel the intensity of it, even with my eyes closed.” you could hear the chuckle in his voice.
“Sorry,” you mumbled, feeling the heat rising in your cheeks. You shifted in your seat, trying to appear nonchalant as you averted your gaze from George’s sleeping form.
“It’s okay,” he said softly, his eyes still closed. “I don’t mind.”
You risked a glance back at him, finding his lips turned up in a small, lopsided smile. The warmth in his expression eased the tension coiled within you, and you couldn’t help but return his smile.
“Hey, y/n, look at me,” he said and your eyes finally met, making you suck in a deep breath. “Good morning,” he smiled.
“Good morning,” you replied. “Did you sleep okay?”
“I did,” George answered, pushing himself up into a sitting position on the couch. He stretched his arms above his head, letting out a contented sigh.
"You should have slept in the bed," you said, unable to keep the words from spilling out. "I could have taken the couch."
George shook his head, a small smile playing on his lips. "I'm fine here," he assured you, his voice warm and gentle. "Besides, I've slept on worse during my travels."
You shook your head, but chuckled anyway, the tension ebbing away as you let yourself relax into the moment.
“Do you… Do you want to stay for breakfast? I could make us something to eat,” you offered, a flicker of hope dancing in your eyes.
George’s smile widened, his gaze meeting yours with a softness that made your heart flutter. “Yes, I would love that, y/n,” he replied, gratitude shining in his eyes.
“Great!” You rose from the arm chair, a newfound sense of determination fueling your steps as you made your way to the kitchen. The familiar sounds of George following behind you brought a smile to your lips, the simple act of sharing a meal together filling you with a warmth that you hadn’t felt in a long time.
“I’ll just wash up while you prepare the food,” George offered, rolling up his sleeves as he headed towards the bathroom to freshen up.
The sound of running water mingled with the clinking of dishes as you set about gathering ingredients for breakfast.
As you cracked eggs into a bowl, a sense of contentment washed over you. George’s presence in your home felt right, like a missing piece clicking into place. The aroma of sizzling bacon filled the kitchen, punctuated by the rich scent of freshly brewed coffee. But the magic of the morning was disrupted when George called for you.
“Um, y/n, did you throw away my toothbrush?”
You froze mid-crack, the eggshell slipping from your fingers and landing in the bowl with a soft splat. The box.
You quickly wiped your hands on a kitchen towel and rushed to the bathroom, where George was standing with an open toiletry bag in his hand. “I thought I left my toothbrush here,” he said, a puzzled expression on his face.
Your heart sank as you remembered how you packed all of his things into a cardboard box and put it by the front door, looking to erase any trace of him from your apartment. The guilt washed over you in a wave, knowing that you had acted rashly in a moment of hurt and confusion.
“George, I…” you began, but the words caught in your throat. How could you tell him that you had packed up his belongings, fully intending to remove every trace of him from your place? The silence stretched between you, thick with unspoken regret and heartache.
George’s expression shifted from confusion to understanding, his gaze flickering with a mix of disappointment and resignation. “You were going to send my things back,” he stated quietly, more as a statement of fact than a question.
You nodded wordlessly, unable to meet his eyes as shame burned hot in your cheeks. “I-I’m sorry,” you stammered, the weight of your actions crashing down on you with full force. “I shouldn’t have—”
“It’s okay, y/n,” George interrupted gently, his voice soft and forgiving. “I understand why you did it.” He reached out to place a comforting hand on your shoulder, his touch grounding you in the midst of your turmoil. “I know things have been difficult between us, but we can talk about it. We can figure this out together.”
Tears welled up in your eyes as you finally dared to look at him, seeing the sincerity in his gaze that mirrored the ache in your own heart. “I never wanted to push you away,” you whispered, the words heavy with regret. “I just… I didn’t know how to handle everything.”
George’s thumb brushed away a stray tear from your cheek, his touch gentle and full of understanding. “We both made mistakes,” he admitted, his voice tinged with vulnerability. “But it doesn’t mean we can’t try to make things right.”
A surge of hope blossomed within you at his words, a flicker of light in the darkness that had clouded your hearts for so long. But all of a sudden, the apartment smelled of burning.
“Oh my God, the bacon!” You bolted back to the kitchen, where smoke billowed from the skillet on the stove. The once-crackling bacon lay charred and forgotten, a victim of your distraction. Frantically waving a towel to disperse the smoke, you turned off the burner and opened a window to let the acrid fumes escape.
George followed you into the kitchen, a chuckle escaping his lips at the sight of the burnt bacon. “Well, I guess breakfast is going to be delayed a bit,” he remarked, his eyes crinkling with amusement.
You couldn’t help but join in his laughter, the tension that had gripped your heart moments ago loosening its hold. “I promise I’m a better cook than this,” you said, a sheepish grin on your face as you cleared away the charred remains of breakfast.
“I have no doubt about that,” George replied, stepping closer to you and taking the towel from your hands to help with the clean-up. The simple act of working together in harmony warmed your soul, a silent understanding passing between you as you moved around the kitchen in tandem. Once the cleaning was done, you both settled at the small kitchen table.
“Stay here, I’ll be right back,” you said, rushing to the corner by your front door.
You returned with the cardboard box that held George's things, feeling a mix of apprehension and determination.
“All your things are in here,” George watched as you placed the cardboard box on the table, his expression unreadable as you spoke. Silence enveloped the kitchen, broken only by the distant sounds of traffic outside. Talking about packing his stuff was one thing, but seeing that you actually did it was another. You held your breath, waiting for George’s response, unsure of what to expect. Would he be angry? Hurt? Disappointed?
Slowly, George reached out and lifted the lid of the box, his gaze flickering over the contents within. His fingers brushed against familiar items—a toothbrush, a worn paperback novel, a battered travel journal, a familiar beanie, the softly knit fabric a testament to the countless times he had worn it on chilly nights—as if seeking reassurance in their presence. 
George's eyes flickered between the contents of the box and your face, searching for any hint of what was to come. Your heart felt heavy with the weight of your actions, the fear of rejection looming over you like a storm cloud ready to burst.
“I never should have tried to erase you from my life like that. It was a mistake and I’m sorry.” you said. “You can have everything put back or take them with you. It’s your choice now. If it’s the latter, I’ll understand—”
“What do you want?” His voice was soft, but the question echoed loudly in the space between you. What did you want? It was a simple question with a million answers, each one more complicated than the last.
“It doesn’t matter, it’s not up to me—”
“It matters to me,” George interjected, his gaze unwavering as he met your eyes. “I need to know what you want. Not what you think I want to hear, but what you truly desire in your heart.”
Blinking away the tears that threatened to fall, you met his gaze. “I want you back. All the time, everyday.”
George's expression softened, a mixture of relief and hope shining in his eyes. Without a word, he reached for your hand and pulled you onto his lap. You didn’t protest. The gesture was both familiar and foreign, the warmth of his embrace wrapping around you like a lifeline.
“I want that too, y/n,” George said softly, his voice filled with sincerity. “I want us to try again, to work through our problems together and rebuild what we had.” he rested his chin on your shoulder, arms wrapped tightly around you as you leaned into him.
“I was so scared, George. When you confessed—”
“Look, we can pretend I never confessed if it means we’ll stay—”
“What?! No! You can’t just take back your confession! That’s such a cowardly move and the least I expected from you, George William Russell!”
George's eyes widened at your outburst, surprise flickering across his face before giving way to a mixture of amusement and affection. His grip on you tightened briefly before he loosened it, allowing you to turn around and face him. You could see the humor dancing in his eyes as a smile tugged at the corners of his lips.
“Oh no, you pulled the middle name card and now I’m terrified.” A chuckle escaped George’s lips, the tension between you both dissipating with each shared smile.
“I had to. I will not allow it. Especially not when I feel the same way towards you.” your admission hung in the air like a fragile thread, waiting to be strengthened or severed by the response it would elicit.
George’s eyes widened at your words, his eyes searching yours for any hint of doubt or uncertainty. “Eh… fucking pardon?"
“I’m in love with you too, George William. I mean it.” you even surprised yourself how easy it was to say it. You didn’t feel scared anymore. If anything, you felt invincible.
But seeing the look on his face made you doubt. You held your breath, waiting for his response, the silence stretching between you like an impassable chasm. What if he didn’t love you like that anymore? What if the space you have asked for helped him get over you? He did try to take back his confession.
Slowly, a smile spread across his face, breaking like the dawn after a long night.
“I… I don’t even know where to begin,” George murmured, his voice thick with emotion. “I never expected…” He trailed off, at a loss for words as he reached up to cup your cheek, his touch gentle and reverent.
You rested your forehead against his, sighing in relief. “Time apart helped me open my eyes. I realized how much you mean to me, that I was so lost without you. I tried to fill the void your absence left with distractions and busyness, but nothing ever felt quite right. It was like a puzzle missing a piece, incomplete no matter how hard I tried to force it together. But now, with you here in front of me, holding me close and looking at me like I'm the only thing that matters, I finally feel whole again.”
George’s eyes shimmered with unshed tears as he listened to your heartfelt words, his thumb gently caressing your cheek. The weight of the past lingered in the air between you, but the warmth of your confession enveloped you both like a comforting embrace. In that moment, all the uncertainties and fears melted away, leaving only the truth of your feelings shining bright.
“I love you, y/n,” George finally whispered, his voice filled with sincerity. “I never stopped loving you.”
You captured his lips in a tender kiss, pouring all your love and gratitude into the simple act, catching him off guard. But quickly, he kissed you back, burying his hands in your hair to pull you even closer.
It was a kiss filled with longing, with promises of a future together, of rediscovered love and unspoken apologies. The world outside faded away as you melted into each other, the taste of forgiveness and hope on your lips. The box of George’s things lay forgotten on the table, a silent witness to the reunion that had unfolded before it.
As you pulled back, George cupped your face in his hands, his gaze searching yours with a depth of emotion that took your breath away. “I want to make things right between us, y/n. I want us to rebuild what we had and create something even stronger. Will you give me that chance?”
There was no hesitation in your response as you nodded, a smile of pure joy lighting up your face. “Yes, George. I want that more than anything.”
You leaned in to kiss him again, but his stomach rumbled loudly, breaking the tender moment with a burst of laughter from both of you. George’s cheeks flushed with embarrassment as he sheepishly rubbed his stomach, a playful glint in his eyes.
“I think that’s a sign we should probably eat something,” he said with a chuckle.
You nodded, feeling your stomach join in with its own protest. “I think burnt bacon is off the menu for this morning,” you replied, teasingly.
George laughed and stood up, pulling you along with him. “Let’s order in. I’ll make sure this time it’s something edible.”
“What’s wrong with my cooking?”
George raised an eyebrow at your question, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Your cooking is charming. But let’s just say I prefer my bacon a little less… crispy.”
You playfully swatted his arm before following him to the living room, where the two of you settled down on the couch with your favorite takeout menus spread out. As you leaned against George’s side, the scent of new beginnings lingering in the air around you, you couldn’t help but feel grateful for second chances and the love that never truly faded, no matter how much time had passed. Together, you began planning your first meal as a couple, laughter and joy filling the space that once held only precariousness and regret.
And as you listened to George’s easy banter and felt his fingers interlaced with yours, you knew deep in your heart that this time, everything would be different. This time, you both were ready to face whatever challenges came your way, hand in hand, knowing that you’ll always have each other.
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wildrangers · 3 months
Text
The Planets and the Fates and All the Stars Aligned // William Nylander
Word Count: 3.5K
Summary: The three times Willy almost asked you out and the one time he finally did
{This is my submission for the lovely @jackhues for The Winter Fic Exchange 2k24, organized by the amazing @wyattjohnston!}
Warnings/tropes: mutual pining, poor communication, resolved (minor) angst, fluff, cursing, drinking
You were grateful that Auston was taking you under his wing following your big move to Toronto—seriously. It was better to be at a New Year’s Eve party where you knew all of one person rather than alone in your apartment. Though…there were a lot of loud drunk men at this party which wasn’t your favorite vibe. You’d much prefer enjoying a nice cocktail with a view of Toronto over being stuffed in one of Tony’s teammate’s suburban homes. But really—you were grateful for Auston and this somewhat odd built in social network that came with him.
You were drawn from your thoughts by a cheer from the pong table and you couldn’t help but chuckle at the intense excitement of the younger guys currently facing off there. You flipped your wrist around to see the time again just as a large, familiar hand landed on your shoulder.
“That’s at least the fifth time you’ve checked the time since we got here…what, an hour ago?” Auston teased, grinning as he took the seat next to you.
“It’s only the fourth” you grumbled making Auston raise his hands in surrender.
“My apologies for the slander, miss.”
You rolled your eyes and jostled your shoulder into his before settling your head there instead. “I’m just tired from the move and everyone here seems very…extroverted?” you tried, not wanting to speak poorly of the group you barely knew.
“Look, I get it” he replied, ruffling your hair gently. “Can I please get you a drink now? At least your hands will be busy then.”
You nodded against his shoulder before raising your head so he could go grab your favorite drink. You were surprised when his place was quickly filled by a blonde-haired boy with mischievous blue eyes.
“You must be Julia, I’m Willy” he smiled, offering his hand for you to shake. You smirked, gripping his hand in your own. You were not, in fact, Julia, but this should be entertaining.
“Nice to meet you, Willy. I hope Auston hasn’t said anything too horrific about me.”
“Oh no, nothing like that. I just wanted to make sure I talked to you before things got too serious with him.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah, I mean a gorgeous girl like yourself should know that I am available and a much, much better catch” he stated confidently and you threw your head back with laughter.
“Well, I may as well hear the sales pitch now” you smirked, pleasantly surprised by the tipsy man before you.
“I mean first of all” he said, simply pointing to his hairline, which drew a gasp from your mouth as you whacked his arm, “I’m just saying!”
“What are you ‘just saying’ to my cousin, William?”
Will’s blue eyes widened as he processed Auston’s words. “Wait so you’re…not Julia?”
Auston handed you your drink, “No, this is Y/N, weirdo. I was going to bring Julia to dinner tomorrow night but maybe I won’t now. How long did she have you going?”
“Long enough to put my foot in my mouth” he admitted and you smirked, pleased at the pink tinge rising to his cheeks. “But not so long that I can’t recover?” he questioned.
“Stay tuned” you replied, maintaining eye contact as you took a sip of your drink. Luckily, Auston was called away leaving just you two again.
“I swear, I’m not usually like that” he began and you tilted your head slightly.
“Like what?”
He seemed at a loss for words so you chuckled, “You’re fine, I’ll stop fucking with you now. You were just so confidently wrong, I had to see where things went.”
He chuckled to himself, “Confidently wrong is kind of a good summary for me actually…”
“The great William Nylander? No, I’d say most the time your confidence is probably just right.”
“You even knew who I was and still let me make a fool of myself?!”
You giggled and nodded, “I obviously know who you are, I watch as many of Ton’s games as I can. You’re usually playing in them too.”
“Wait, so rewind. You’re Tony’s cousin?”
“Not by blood, but yeah. We grew up together and our families are super close. He’s been trying to get me out here forever, so when a better job opened up in my company’s Toronto location, how could I say no?”
“When did you move?”
You jokingly checked your watch, “About eight hours ago now.”
“Oh well, welcome! I love it here.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah” he nodded, sipping his drink and you couldn’t help how your eyes were drawn to his mouth with the movement. “I moved around so much as a kid; this is the longest I’ve ever lived in one place. Minus summers in Sweden, obviously”
“I would love to go to Sweden” you admitted. “It looks so beautiful.”
As he began passionately talking about Sweden, conversation flowed seamlessly between you. He seemed genuinely interested in your answers to the questions he asked, eyes always remaining firmly on you in a way that made your stomach flip but also steadied you in the otherwise loud room.
You were dragged from your conversation as the countdown to the New Year began.
“Damn, it’s almost midnight already?” you questioned, checking your watch that had long since been forgotten.
“Guess so…do you want to ring in the New Year together?” Will asked and you were surprised by the tentative tone of his voice. Your eyes rose to meet his and you noted the nerves showing in the crinkle of his eyes.
“Yeah, sure” you smiled, scootching closer to him. “I have to admit, I’m surprised you didn’t seem confident I’d say yes.”
“I mean I wouldn’t want to come in too hot, making assumptions—that would be embarrassing, no?” he joked as he wrapped a tender arm around your shoulders.
“Of course, wouldn’t want to make that same mistake twice in one evening” you teased back and you earned a rich laugh from him that made your toes curl and you dipped your head to hide your grin. As the countdown entered single digits, your eyes rose to meet his again but he was focused somewhere just beyond your shoulder before turning his attention back to you.
“3…2…1…Happy New Year!” the room erupted but your world had shrunk to just you and Willy. You had a sneaking suspicion it had been Auston who briefly grabbed his attention from you, which was confirmed as he leaned in to place a gentle kiss to your cheek rather than going in for the kiss. You were disappointed until you felt his mouth brush your ear, sending a shiver down your spine, “Happy New Year, Y/N.”
***
Once Will had given the bottle of wine and his thanks to Mitch and Stephanie for hosting, his eyes were scanning the room for you. He’d been kicking himself for months since meeting you for not getting your number on New Year’s but Auston’s stern stare had scared him off, as embarrassed as he was to admit it. He just hadn’t wanted to risk his friendship with his teammate, or worse, make you uncomfortable since you’d just met. Plus, the firm “If you hurt her, you’re dead to me” lecture Auston had given him the next day at practice had driven the point home.
So, some combination of your new job and Auston’s protectiveness had kept you away from any team, family, and friends get together’s until now, just as the regular season was wrapping up. Just as he had begun to give up hope that he’d see you again, Mitch mentioned that Auston had RSVP’d for 3 people, you and a plus one that he assumed was whatever girl Tony was currently seeing. Will didn’t waste another minute before confirming his own attendance.
His heart sped up as he saw you chatting with Johnny, your body language so much more relaxed than when he met you months ago. He made his way to you and when your eyes met his, the broad grin you sent his way knocked him out.
“Willy!” you called, standing to greet him with a warm hug.
“Hey, it’s been too long, how have you been?” he asked, pulling away just far enough to take you in. “You look beautiful tonight, of course.”
He was rewarded with a dip of your head as you hid your shy smile at his compliment, “I’ve been good, busy, so I’m glad Tony mentioned this dinner, it’s nice to see everyone.”
A long pause filled the air as he simply gazed into your warm, smiling eyes. “Hey Willy, I’m here too” his captain called from behind you and Willy laughed, greeting him with a handshake.
“Sorry man, it’s just been a minute since I’ve seen Y/N here” he shrugged sheepishly. John nodded, clapping him on the back, “Since New Year’s, yeah?”
Will shot him a questioning look but Johnny only smirked before walking off to chat with another group.
“Will, you’ve been having such an amazing season, I’m so happy for you” you smiled, settling back down in your seat and patting the spot next to you. He quickly sat where directed, pleased that the small couch made his outer thigh gently press into yours—he was even more content when you didn’t shift your leg away but closer to his.
“Thanks, I appreciate it. Just trying to gear up for the Playoff’s now. How have you been, settling in well?”
As you two caught up with small talk, he wracked his brain on how to ask you out without making it weird in case you said no. This conversation flowed just as well as your first and your sly humor shone through even more now that you seemed more at ease.
“I’ve missed seeing you at other parties like this” he admitted when the conversation naturally lulled.
“I think Auston may have refrained from inviting me to a few” you admitted, rolling your eyes. “And then the last few just didn’t work with my schedule. I was happy when Ton mentioned you’d be here tonight though.”
“Yeah?” he asked, hopeful as his heart began pattering more intensely.
“Yeah” you grinned, knocking your shoulder into his. “I really enjoyed hanging with you last time.”
“Me too” he smiled, taking in the genuine joy on your face. “I was actually wondering…”
He trailed off as he saw your eyes shift behind him and widen. “Jake!” you called, standing up and waving over an unfamiliar guy who wrapped you in an embrace and quickly pecked your cheek.
“Hey pretty lady, sorry I’m a little late. The subway got delayed” he replied, tucking a strand of your hair behind your ears. “Is this Will?”
As introductions were made, Will’s heart sank as he realized your boyfriend was the plus one, not Auston’s girl. It looked like he’d missed his chance with you after all.
***
You worked your way through the crowd, pausing as people you’d grown close to since your move to Toronto stopped you to chat. Johnny and his wife were hosting the start of the season party, welcoming everyone back to Toronto after being wherever they called home in the off season. You were hoping Will would be here but had refrained from asking Auston to avoid his eye rolls and protective bullshit.
When you’d seen Will at that spring party, you couldn’t admit to him that you’d partially been avoiding him. Not because you didn’t like him, but the opposite—you’d felt so drawn to him on New Year’s only to have Auston insert himself in the middle of things. After enough time had passed, you’d finally let your coworker set you up on that blind date with Jake. Who was nice but had basically been wiped from your mind when you’d met Will’s eyes across the room that second night.
You’d let yourself get wrapped up in the press of his leg on yours, the intense focus of his eyes as you caught up. Had allowed yourself to slip into the flirtation that had flowed so naturally between you during your first meeting. Until Jake had arrived, and you’d noted Will deflate before excusing himself.
You’d seen him a few times since then but he kept a wide berth, which you understood. But it had sucked and drove home that as nice as Jake is, he wasn’t the one for you. Which is why, several months out from that split, you were determined to make your move on Will—enough with waiting.
You grabbed a drink and surveyed the room, heart fluttering as you heard Willy’s signature laugh from across the room. He was talking with a younger guy you didn’t recognize but you strode over anyway. “Will!” you called and he spun, wide-eyed, at your voice.
“Y/N?” he smiled uncertainly but you just pulled him into a tight embrace.
“How was your summer? Tell me all about Sweden” you grinned, quickly introducing yourself to the rookie beside him who made himself scarce.
“Sure, but you seem…different” he noted, scanning your form as if he could find the answer there.
“Do I? I mean, not much has changed except Jake and I broke up” you offered and his eyes widened slightly.
“I’m sorry?” he offered.
“Don’t be. He was nice but it just wasn’t it, you know?”
He nodded, eyes skimming around the room before pulling out his phone. “Here, let me show you some photos from back home.”
You leaned into the comfort of his warmth, your eyes either taking in each photo he selected to show you or tracing the familiar lines of his face as he swiped through his camera roll. He was just so beautiful.
“It looks like a great summer, are you bummed to be back?” you joked and he chuckled, shaking his head.
“No, I always love coming back to Toronto—this is home too” he replied, eyes boring into yours. You couldn’t help yourself as you reached up to sweep a strand of hair that had fallen into his face, your hand lingering there, cupping his cheek.
“Y/N…” he breathed and you were surprised when his eyes left yours to once again scan the room. His phone lit up, drawing your attention, just as he began. “I actually am…”  
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry” you cut him off, drawing your hand back, eyes fixed on his lock screen—a gorgeous shot of him with a beautiful woman tucked into his side.
His gaze followed yours and he quickly locked his phone screen, mouth forming a hard line. “No, I’m sorry. I should have been up front but whenever I see you, I just…”
“You just what?” you asked quietly, unable to stop yourself.
“I can only think of keeping you close. Even when I know I can’t, so I’m sorry.”
You sadly shook your head forcing a smile, “No, I did the same thing to you, didn’t I? I get it. I hope she makes you happy Will, have a great season” you assured him, squeezing his shoulder before excusing yourself from the party altogether.
***
Will wasn’t one to believe in fate but it seemed like the stars may be finally aligning as he entered Auston’s apartment to celebrate New Year’s Eve. He’d done his homework this time, enlisting Steph to make sure you weren’t seeing anyone. After your last encounter, his fledgling relationship hadn’t lasted long—not when all he could think about was you. That wasn’t fair to her, so he’d broken things off and thrown himself into the season. It was a contract year for him, he had to focus. But that focus didn’t stop him from noting that some of his best games were ones where he knew you’d be in the crowd.
Will wandered over to the large windows filling Ton’s living room, taking in the city skyline. He’d done a few laps but had yet to see you. Truth be told, he wasn’t in much of a party mood—he just wanted to see you. So, he wondered off from the main party down the hallway to what he knew to be Ton’s guest room for some quiet. He didn’t hear any noise from behind the door so he gently opened it, startling when he saw you curled up on the bed.
You hadn’t noticed the door opening, your head buried in a book with Taylor Swift playing softly from your phone. He took a moment to enjoy the sight before him—you, dressed to the nine’s, feet wrapped in fuzzy socks, eyes fervently scanning the pages before you, heels forgotten beside him by the door.
“Y/N?” he spoke softly, as to not startle you but you jumped anyway.
“Will?” you questioned, your head tilting to the side. “What are you doing here?”
“The New Year’s Eve party, silly, what are you doing locked away in here looking so beautiful?”
He was thrilled when you ducked your head, trying to hide the flattered smile that bloomed on your face. “Promise not to laugh.”
“Scout’s honor” he promised, settling on the foot of the bed.
“I’m on the last book of this fantasy series and I just wanted to make sure everyone got through the battle okay” you chuckled, holding up your nearly finished book. “I said hi to everyone but when I didn’t see you, I just wondered in here to try and finish it before midnight.”
“Well, is everyone safe and sound? I wouldn’t want to disturb you” he teased lightly and you rolled your eyes.
“Yeah, I have like ten pages left” you chuckled. “I’ll come out and join the party in a few, I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry” he shrugged, standing up but then stopped himself. “Would you actually care if I hung in here with you? I’m not in much of a party mood.”
“Sure” you beamed, scooting over on the bed to make room for him beside you. He slipped his shoes off, crawling up the bed to settle into your side, arm wrapped around your middle as you lifted your book.
“Is this okay?” he questioned quietly and you hummed in answer.
“Here, just lay down—that way I can rest my book on your shoulders” you motioned towards your lap and he didn’t have to be told twice, settling his head on your satin covered thighs.
A comfortable silence filled the room, broken only by you flipping the pages of your book. Will could stay this way forever, your scent wrapped around him, his breathing slowing to match your own.
As he began drifting off, you closed the book and set it aside. He felt your focus shift fully to him but he kept his eyes closed, not wanting to break this peaceful spell. He could have purred when your fingers gently ran through his hair, lightly massaging his scalp whenever your hand returned to the top of his head.
“I’m single” he murmured, nuzzling deeper into your lap.
“I know” you answered and he turned to look up into your eyes, confusion evident there judging by your chuckle. “I asked Stephanie.”
He let out a loud laugh, gently taking your hand in his own, “I may have done the same thing” he admitted, causing you to snort and shake your head.
“So, what does that mean?” you asked quietly.
“Hopefully, it means that when I ask you out, you’ll say yes” he questioned, nerves oddly not coming to his stomach. He knew how long you both had wanted this, the timing just never being quite right.
“Well, I can’t wait to say yes then” you smiled, leaning down to press a gentle kiss to his brow bone as your alarm rang from the nightstand. “Oh, time to get up, it’s 11:55.”
He shifted in response, sitting up and stretching, attempting to smooth out his shirt.
“Here” you offered walking towards him, heels firmly on your feet. He paused his fussing, allowing you to straighten his collar and smooth out the wrinkles that had developed on his chest. Your hand gently ran through his hair, settling down any stray hairs that had fallen out of place. “All better. Do I look alright?”
“You look perfect” he said honestly, rising off the bed and wrapping an arm around your shoulder. As you both exited the room, he marveled at how perfectly you fit there, tucked into his side.
The countdown had begun and Will’s eyes scanned the room, noting Auston immediately finding the two of you in the crowd.
“He’s intolerable” you mumbled, eyes also falling on Tony across the room. As the crowd counted down from ten, a giggle rose in his throat as you jokingly raised your middle finger to your cousin before turning back to him.
His hands settled on your hips, pulling you flush against him as your hands cupped his jaw, thumb caressing his cheek. With the New Year beginning, your lips finally met his and he wound his fingers through your hair to pull you closer. As your mouths moved in perfect harmony together, the rightness of this moment settled around him.
As the crowd picked back up again, he pulled away, resting his forehead against yours. “Can I take you out to dinner tomorrow night?”
“You have a game tomorrow, silly” you answered, chuckling. “But you can take me out the next night.”
A/N: I hope y'all enjoyed! Please forgive any typos, I am in fact working through a concussion currently. It turns out writing for Willy has become one of my new favorite things to do. Always happy to hear feedback :)
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russo-woso · 2 months
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I just want to feel something | Alessia Russo
Warning smut, MDNI
First smut so I’m a bit nervous about this one.
Let me know what you think
————————
You always loved going to England camps. You felt at home when you were with them. You felt at home when you were with her.
Her being Alessia Russo.
You'd grown up with Alessia in the youth age groups but somehow, you'd never really spoken to her.
Sure you had spoken to her briefly after a match, telling her how well she had played but you couldn't remember a time where you'd spoken to her about anything apart from football.
You had always wanted to talk to her but you'd always change your mind at the last second. With your heart beating unusually fast and sweat gathering on your forehead, you'd figure that it wasn't worth it for you knew she didn't like you.
This time at camp though, you had made a promise to yourself. You were going to speak to Alessia.
And that's what you had done. Well, attempted to anyway.
Your heart had begun to thump in your chest as you watched her from across the relaxation room.
She was sat with Ella, laughing and smiling about whatever they were talking about.
You looked into her eyes. They were glistening in the light. They were perfect, just like her. You felt as though you could get lost in them forever.
As you continued to examine her features, you watched Tooney get up, leaving Alessia by herself.
At this point, it was just you, Alessia, Millie and Rachel in the room.
Millie and Rach were deep in conversation whilst Alessia had turned towards the match that was on the TV.
The smile that was on her face two minutes ago was gone. The glistening in her eyes had gone. It seemed as though you were looking at a completely different person.
You didn't know where the confidence had come from, but with one final breath, you stood up and moved to sit next to Alessia.
"You okay? You seem to be, I don't know how to describe it. Out of it?" You asked, a calming tone in your voice.
"Yeah, I'm fine." Alessia turned towards you, a small reassuring smile on her face.
The smile seemed to disappear far too quickly though.
"I know we don't really know each other well, but I'm always here, okay?" You tell her, placing your hand on the centre of her back.
"Thank you, Y/N." Again, she looked at you, giving you a small smile before turning her attention back to the match. "Actually, Y/N, can I tell you something?"
"Anything, Less."
"I feel-" She began but a strong accent cut her off.
"-Less, I went to get us a cuppa but there was a massive spider in the kitchen." Ella came bouncing into the room. You couldn't understand how she was so energetic. Everyone had done so much in training to the fact that some people were having an afternoon sleep, but Ella was still bouncing off the walls. "Sorry, were you two talking?"
"We were but it's nothing serious. I'll see you around, Y/N." Alessia said and you removed your hand from her back.
"Yeah, see you around." And with that, you got up and left, heading straight to your room.
You didn't feel like talking to anyone. You didn't even go down for dinner. You were so caught up in your thoughts that you forgot.
The sad look on Alessia's face clouded your head. The different possibilities of what she was going to say. The way the conversation would have gone if Tonney hadn't interrupted.
The thoughts wouldn't leave your mind.
That was until a small knock echoed throughout your room.
You got off your bed, quickly glancing at the clock that read 22:48, before opening the door.
You didn't really know who you were expecting to open the door to, but it certainly wasn't the blonde forward.
"Alessia?"
"Hi, sorry, I know it's late, but the conversation we had earlier hasn't left my mind and I feel like we need to finish it." She said rather quickly, scratching the back of neck as she said it.
"No it's okay. I can't get to sleep so it's fine. Come in." You opened the door more so she could walk in.
Once she had entered, you both stood awkwardly looking at each other.
"I don't really know why I came here. I just — you're different from everyone else. I feel like you'd actually listen to me. Actually, no, it's unfair for me to put this all on you. I'm sorry for com—" Alessia began to walk out but you grabbed ahold of her wrist, pulling her back towards you.
"—Alessia, I meant what I said earlier. I'm always here. If you want to talk, you can. I'm here to listen." You told her, rubbing your thumb across her hand to comfort her.
"I don't know how to describe how I feel. I just feel so alone. I feel empty. Since I left United, I've felt as though I've left my whole life behind. My life was in Manchester and I don't know if I'll be able to create a new life in London. It's such a big change and I don't know if I can do it. I just have no emotions that are good. I just want to feel something." Alessia admitted, tears running down her face as you brought her in for a hug.
"Oh, lessi. I promise you, you'll find a life in London. I did. I moved from Manchester city to Chelsea. It was the hardest thing I've ever done. I'd been with city for four years and then I made the final decision and I restarted my whole entire life at Chelsea. It was so hard. So so hard. But I learnt to value the new beginning. It's gets better, I promise." You said to her, wiping her tears away.
"Thank you, Y/N."
"You've got such beautiful eyes, less." You complimented her, watching a small smile appear on her face.
"You've got a beautiful smile." She said back, similarly, a small smile appearing on your face, along with a red pigment in your cheeks.
"Alessia, you said you wanted to feel something. Would you feel something if I did this?" You asked, cautiously as you began to move towards her.
You got to the point where you could feel her breath on your face.
You made eyes contact with her before flickering down to her lips.
What surprised you the most, wasn't the fact that you were about to kiss Alessia. It was that Alessia had made the final movement to connect you two.
The kiss was gentle. Both too cautious to even move in case you overwhelmed one another.
You pulled away at the same time, smiles on both your faces.
"I've wanted to do that for such a long time." Alessia admitted, your heart missing a beat as she said it.
"Me too." You agreed, pausing and taking a few breaths. "Alessia, I really like you and I don't want that to be a one off."
"I really like you too." She whispered against your lips.
This time the kiss was lustful. There was a sense of desperation from the both of you.
I mean who'd blame you? You and Alessia had been waiting for this moment for years.
The kiss continued, getting messy and sloppy.
Eventually, after fighting for dominance of the kiss, Alessia won and picked you up.
Your legs wrapped around her waist as her hands were under your thighs supporting you up.
She walked you up against the wall, moving her lips down to your neck.
The whines that left your mouth as she sucked on your pulse point made it clear to Alessia what you wanted.
"Can I take this off?" Alessia asked, putting you down and playing with the hem of your shirt.
"Yes please." You said, Alessia putting you down so she could take it off.
After a strip show of you both taking your clothes off, barely being able to take your lips off one another, you allowed Alessia to move her lips down to your collarbone.
"You're gorgeous, Y/N." Alessia whispered in your ear as she pressed a final kiss to your neck.
"So are you, lessi."
"I'm gonna pick you up, okay, baby?" Alessia asked you, her voice all husky.
You nodded in approval and she pressed two hands on your ass and lifted you up with ease.
She walked you over to the bed, putting you down gently before climbing on top of you.
"Lessi, baby, please." You whine as her hands explored your hips.
Her lips started trailing down from your neck to your torso.
You let out a gasp as you felt her mouth around your nipple.
As she continued down your body, she caressed every small detail of you.
Kissing scars from the injuries of past games, noting down where you enjoyed her mouth, memorising the small noises that left your mouth.
As Alessia approached your core, she looked up at you one more time.
Without her even saying anything, you understood what she meant and you sent a  desperate nod to her.
She grabbed ahold of your thighs, stroking her thumb across them before sliding her tongue between your folds.
You bucked your hips into her face and tangled your hand in her hair.
Alessia moaned at the taste of you, the vibrations making you whimper.
"That feels so good, lessi baby." You moaned and Alessia increased her pace.
You were so confused. Less than ten minutes ago, you were lost in your own thoughts. Thinking about what Alessia was going to say.
And now, she was here with her head in between your legs.
You couldn't think straight though, the pleasure had taken over your whole entire body.
You felt numb from it, a good numb.
"Fuck, baby, I'm close." You managed to get out as Alessia's tongue continued to flick at your clit.
Alessia detached her tongue from your clit, and instead stuck two fingers inside you.
"Does that feel good, baby?" She asked you, leaning down to kiss your collarbone.
"So good, lessi."
"Fuck, I love it when you say my name." She said and a familiar knot appeard in your stomach.
"Shit. 'm gonna cum, less."
"Cum for me, love." Alessia said and with that, your high came tumbling on you.
Your head fell back against the pillow, your eyes slamming shut.
You felt your legs begin to shake and a mix of curse words and Alessia's name slipped out of your mouth.
Once you'd calmed down and your heart rate had started coming back to normal, Alessia laid down next to you, staring up at the ceiling.
"You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that." She revealed, turning her head to look at you.
"Me too." You admitted, before the room was filled with silence.
A small giggle left your mouth and Alessia looked at you with a confused look.
"What are you laughing at, baby?"
"This. Ten minutes ago you were telling me how alone you felt and now you're laying down next to me after giving me a mind blowing orgasm." You explained and a smile appeared on Less' face.
"Thank you Y/N for taking my mind off of things."
"You seriously don't have to thank me. I think you already did." You replied, a smirk resting on your face before getting serious again. "Less, I know you might feel alone. But please know that you're not. I'm always here for you. I want to be there for you. I know it's not easy but I'll be with you wherever life takes you."
"Y/N, will you be my girlfriend? I'm sorry if it's really sudden but I feel like you're one of the only people who truly get me. You're kind, you're beautiful, you're thoughtful. And I think I've been in love with you for years but I've just been too afraid to ask you. It's fine if you say no. I know it's—" Alessia started to ramble but you simply smiled at her.
Her cheeks were red and her blonde hair was in her face.
You knew you were already in love with her. You had been for years.
"I'd love to, lessi." You placed a piece of her hair behind her ear and placed your lips on hers, connecting you two into a gently kiss.
"You know, I can't feel my legs." You told less as you pulled away.
"That's what you think about? We were having a really romantic moment then and all you can think about is how you can't feel your legs?" Alessia questioned, laughing at your randomness.
"Well yeah, we've got training tomorrow and it's gonna be bad if I turn up with loads of hickeys and the fact that I can't walk." You explained as she continued to laugh.
"I think it's a job well done to me then."
"It's sure is, baby."
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Eyes of a Stranger- E.M.
Did anyone ask for a Soulmate!AU? No! Did it bring me joy to write? Of course! Here you go my thirsty friends! Love you!
You move across the country to start looking for your Soulmate. Enter: Eddie Munson.
Masterlist
TW- Cursing, drinking, super fluffy fluff at the end
Pairings- Soulmate!Eddie x Reader
Word Count- 4,891
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There’s a gap in your vision. There has been since you were born. It’s one of the facts of life. Everyone is born without their full color spectrum. There’s some chemical imbalance that prohibits it before the right time, and you hate it. You always have. Everyone talks about how beautiful brunettes are, or how delicious chocolate looks melting in a fondue pot, or bread, or even your childhood dog, but you can’t see it, and no matter how hard everyone tries to describe it to you, it never makes any sense when you look and see shades of grey. 
Your parents told you the stories of how they met, how their vision suddenly became full technicolor the moment they locked eyes on each other. How the colors finally swirled into place, completing the puzzle they’d spent their whole lives wondering about. It was one of your favorite bedtime stories, and you remember begging to hear it over and over again until their comforting voices lulled you to sleep.  
They were some of the fortunate ones. It’s not entirely uncommon for people to go their full lives without finding their soulmates. The world is wide, after all, but people can find love elsewhere, even if it’s not with the person they were meant on a cellular level to be with.  
As you grew, you found some small comfort in that fact, allowing yourself to explore the world past the missing warmth of brown that people describe. You let yourself have romantic partners no matter the color of their eyes, explored the nuances of casual and more serious relationships. How could you ever miss something that was never there, anyway? Of course, underneath that lies the crippling fear that you wouldn’t be one of the lucky ones. Sure, there are stories of people finding soulmates even in their last few years of life, but it doesn’t bring you any ease to think that there is someone out there, waiting for you, and the more time you spend apart is one less moment you’ll spend together.  
So, as you near your 23rd birthday, you decide to leave your hometown. You’ve spent your whole life intentionally meeting the eyes of nearly everyone you’ve come across, hoping to find the person that will make you whole, to no avail. It’s time you find new eyes to search.  
There are so many places, so many people that the only way you could ever decide on where to go is to not decide at all. You taped a map to the wall and threw a dart. First, it landed in America, then, on the American map, it landed in Indiana, and on the map of Indiana, it landed on a little town called Hawkins. “It’s as good a place to start as any,” You mumble, taking the dart out of the wall. The goodbyes to your family and friends are hard and tearful, but they know just as well as you how important this is. A couple of your friends had already found their soulmates, and every time you saw them together, your heart ached for their happiness.  
The journey to Hawkins is hard and long, moving all your belongings, finding an apartment with a rental agreement for just six months—if you don’t find your soulmate there, you’d move on to the next place—and a job that could support you while also giving you the opportunity to see a lot of people in a day. But you did it, and a few days after leaving home, you’re settling into your new apartment in the heart of Hawkins Proper. 
It’s small, and the plumbing creaks when you flush the toilet or turn on the shower, but it’s yours for the time being, and that’s enough for you. You arrange your sparce furniture the best you can to make it feel homey, and figure if things go well, you can always get more. The job you found is nice, and the people you work with are kind and funny, and soon you’ve made a little home for yourself in this strange, new place. 
“Y/N!” Your coworker, Steve shouts from across the Family Video. You look up from the shelf of movies you’re stocking over to where he stands behind the counter, his arms laying on the surface, shaggy bangs falling into his face as it always does when he doesn’t put a whole bottle of Farah Fawcett hairspray in it. 
“What’s up?” You call back, glancing between him and the movies as you put the cassette tapes back in their proper spaces. 
“I’m going on my lunch. You want something from the Dairy Queen?” You ponder his question for a moment, your mouth quirking as you think. 
“Yeah, can you get me an Oreo blizzard? And a chicken strip basket? I have cash in my purse,” You raise your eyebrows at him, and he gives a solemn nod. 
“I got you. I’ll be back in ten.” Steve turns and starts toward the back exit, and you go back to your work stocking the tapes, emptying the basket of returns as you meander from shelf to shelf finding the proper places. 
You hear the doorbell ring, and you raise your head, looking toward the door to the customer coming in. “Welcome to Family Video!” You greet. The man walking toward the horror shelves, and he looks over his shoulder in your direction and gives a nod. His eyes are obscured by a pair of dark sunglasses, which always irks you only because you won’t have the opportunity to look into his eyes.  
You walk back toward the counter to prepare to check the man out when he’s finished his selection when he looks back over to you. His dark, shaggy curls flop over part of his face as he calls out to you. “Do you guys have Pet Semetary in yet?”  
“Uhh, let me check,” You go over to the computer and type in the title. When the page loads, you let out a noise of recognition as you look back over to the man. “Yes, we do. But it’s still in the New Releases. Let me go find it for you,” You make your way around the counter to walk over to the New Releases wall, scanning the titles with your eyes, hands on your hips until you spot it. You bend over to pick it up and bring it back over to the counter, where the man is waiting for you to return. 
“Thanks,” he says, giving a small smile. He looks to be about your age. The hands he has rested on the surface of the counter are littered in heavy silver rings, and he’s clad in a faded, moth-eaten Iron Maiden shirt with an acid wash jean vest over it. There’s a small hoop in one of his nostrils, which glints lightly under the fluorescent lights hanging above you. The mostly black curls that hang around his face are highlighted grey where the light hits, so you assume it must be brown. He’s handsome, for sure. His relaxed features give him a refreshing air about him, like you know he’d be an easy friend to have.  
“No problem. Will this be all for you today?” You ask, your customer service voice lilting in the air. He pouts his lips for a moment, looking down at the candy selection below the counter before picking up a king size Reese’s and placing it and sliding it toward you.  
“This too, please,” he says, his pretty smile returning to his boyish features. 
“Sure,” You scan the candy and place it in a plastic bag with the movie. “Can I get your name please?” You ask, moving over to the computer to pull up his profile. 
“Oh, hey Munson. What’s up, man?” Steve comes from behind you, having returned from his break, and you look over your shoulder to his award-winning smile as he offers a hand to the man to clasp. 
“Harrington,” he says in greeting, a breathtaking toothy smile curling at his lips as he takes Steve’s hand in a light slap. “You know, just hanging out,” He shrugs. “What about you?” 
“Oh, you know, I’m just... here,” Steve lets out a small laugh. You watch the interaction, waiting for the two men to finish to complete the transaction. Steve looks over to you and gestures in your direction. “This is Y/N, she’s new in town. Maybe she should come out with us next time we go out to the bar. She needs more friends,” Steve jokes, and you hit him lightly in the shoulder, scoffing. 
“Oh, shut up, Steve. It’s not like I’m a loner. I’ve got you and Rob,” You justify. 
“Yeah, only me and Rob. There’s a whole wide Hawkins out there still to discover, Y/N,” You roll your eyes and shrug off the arm he’s casually rested over your shoulders at that and settle your gaze back on Steve’s friend, who holds a hand out for you to shake. 
“I’m Eddie, nice to meet you,” You take his hand and shake it briefly, a friendly smile forming on your lips. 
“Nice to meet you, too. I’m Y/N L/N,” He gives a quirk of a smile as your hands leave each other. Steve tuns to you, his hand on your shoulder as you look away from Eddie’s face to listen to him. 
“Well, I put your lunch in the break room, if you wanna go ahead and eat. I can finish taking care of Eddie if you want,” You give a nod, moving out of the way for Steve to take over the computer. You give one more small wave to Eddie. 
“It was nice to meet you!” You say. 
“Yeah, you too,” he says. “And you’re definitely welcome to come hang out with us sometime. We usually go chill at the Hideout at least once a week so, you know, you can get the details from Stevie, here,” You can see him quirk a playful eyebrow over his dark sunglasses as he reaches over to clap Steve on the shoulder. A chuckle passes your lips at the nickname, but even more at Steve’s dry reaction to it. 
“Okay, thanks,” You turn to Steve. “I’ll be back in 30 Stevie,” You give Steve a playful bump of your hip before turning and walking toward the back. 
“Yeah, ha ha, whatever, dude,” He scoffs, feigning annoyance. You give another laugh as you push the door open, the smell of your lunch wafting through the otherwise stale air of the back. 
The end of the day nears, and you and Steve are cleaning up the store preparing to close when he mentions Eddie again. “So, I think we’re gonna go out Friday night if you wanna come with us. It’ll be chill. Just some drinks, maybe some pool. Then we usually go to Benny’s after for some burgers. You in?” You shrug, pushing the dust mop across the floor. 
“Yeah, sure. Not like I’ve got anything better to do,” Your eyebrow quirks in thought then as the silence comes back over the store. “Can I ask you something?” 
Steve looks up from where he’s wiping down the counters. “Sure, what’s up?” 
“Has Eddie... has he found his soulmate?” You try to say it casually, but Steve lets out a taunting sound, his elbows going to rest on the surface of the counter as he wiggles his eyebrows at you. 
“Ahh, you like him?” His sugary tone makes a heat break out on your face, and you roll your eyes, trying to brush it off. 
“Not necessarily,” You try to defend yourself. “I just don’t like it when people come in with sunglasses. It’s a pet peeve, I guess. I just don’t like the not knowing part,” You hear Steve scoff from across the store as you reach the far wall with the dustmop, turning around and starting back the other way. 
“Well, no, he hasn’t found his yet. What color are you missing?” He inquires.  
“Brown,”  
“Oh really? Eddie’s eyes are brown.” Steve muses. You scoff at that. You may find Eddie attractive, but what are the freaking odds that the first place you’d moved to would be the home of the one person on the planet you’ve been waiting for your whole life? 
“Come on, Steve. There are 7 billion people on this planet. What are the chances, really? I was just curious,” 
“It happens every day! Everyone’s got someone out there, Y/N. Why couldn’t it be Eddie? Hell, why couldn’t it be me? Or Robin? Or Keith? Just because the chances are slim doesn’t mean they’re zero,” It’s almost like he’s reminding himself of that, too. You’re not the only one that struggles with not having their soulmate. Steve is nothing if not a romantic, you’ve learned. You’ve caught him more than once smiling at the store TV on a slow day, with what as well should be heart eyes while watching some sappy romance movie. You can only imagine that he’s wishing that it were him with his soulmate. You definitely do, from time to time. 
“Yeah, I guess you’re right. But that doesn’t change the fact that the chances are incredibly slim. Like, one in 7 billion slim.” You wouldn’t mind if it were Eddie. You wouldn’t mind if it were anybody. Maybe it’s your quarter life crisis talking, but you’d throw yourself into the arms of anybody who made you see brown. It’s all you’ve ever wanted. 
You used to imagine what your soulmate looked like as a kid. It was actually a school assignment once, in first grade or so. An art project. You remember your parents had it hung on the fridge for a long time, sloppy first grader scribbles with big grey circles for eyes and pink hearts littered around the piece of paper.  
Friday is busy. People like to rent movies in preparation for the weekend. All day it’s person after person as you, Robin, and Steve rotate around the store putting movies away, stocking candy and popcorn, and checking customers out at the register. You’re over near the 18+ section putting away the Z movies when you hear Eddie’s voice over the din of people milling around the store. “Hey, guys. We still on for tonight?” You glance over at Eddie, who’s in a black and white t-shirt that looks just a tad too small—a blessing for you as the sleeves hug his generous biceps, black ink peeking out from beneath— and torn jeans today. There’s a chain hanging from his belt loop and as your eyes look to his face, you see he’s not wearing sunglasses today. Maybe you’ll be able to look and finally put your nagging thoughts to rest. 
“Excuse me miss, can you help me?” You turn to look at the middle-aged lady who’s gently tapped your shoulder, taking in her blue eyes as you stand to talk to her. Like Steve said the other night, there’s a chance your soulmate could be anyone. 
“Of course, what can I do for you?” You keep your attention on her but flick your eyes toward the counter, where you see Eddie still talking to Robin. Just a peek. Just one, and you can stop thinking about it. The lady’s voice pulls your eyes away at the request for the location of a movie, and you dutifully show her the way, taking glances where you can, only to see the shaggy mop of curls obscuring a proper view of Eddie’s face, which you know has that pretty smile as he laughs at a dumb joke Robin threw his way. When you reach the right shelves, you have to bend down to get the movie she’s looking for, and you hand it to her quickly. As you turn back to where Eddie and Robin were standing, talking, laughing, just a moment ago, you find the spot empty. Damn it. I’ll see him later, you think, shrugging it off as you make your way back to the basket of movies waiting to be put away at the back of the store. 
The last dregs of the day give you a bit more energy as the store gets increasingly quieter as less and less people come in in the final hour of open time. There’s more laughter among the three of you, joking and talking about your plans for tonight.  
“So, do you want us to pick you up?” Steve asks, looking to you as you sort through new returns.  
“Yeah, that would be great!” You give him a smile. “Can you pick me up at about 10:30? We’re meeting Eddie at 11, right?” 
Steve nods, tying up a trash bag to take out to the dumpster. “Yeah, that’s cool,” He says. 
“Oh, and you don’t need to wear anything super fancy or whatever. It’s a pretty seedy dive bar, we’re going to, so jeans is fine,” Robin adds. You nod appreciatively at the advice and take a moment to write down your address on a stray post-it to hand to Steve. 
“Here you go, and my phone number is on there too, just in case you need it,” Steve takes it, looks at it for a moment, and then stuffs it into his pocket for later. 
“Awesome. Well, if you want to go ahead and clock out, Robin and I can finish up here. We’ve just gotta finish counting the drawer and take the trash out.”  
“Thanks! I guess I’ll see you in a bit, then,” You wave to both of them and make your exit to the back of the store to where your car is parked and drive home to your apartment. You decide to take a quick shower to strip the layer of grime accumulated from your work day from your body, letting the warm water carry away the stress down the drain. After that, you dry your hair roughly with your blow dryer before making your way to your tiny bedroom closet to look for something to wear.  
You know Robin said not to wear anything fancy, but you do want to look nice. There’s a 1 in 7 billion chance that Eddie is your soulmate, but even if he isn’t, it would be nice to have someone as good looking as him flirt with you for the night. You decide on a hand me down pair of bellbottoms from your mom that makes your butt look incredible and a simple black halter top. You pair it with a nice long necklace that trails down your cleavage, just to give a path for Eddie or whoever to look down and some small gold earrings. You want to do a nice neutral makeup look, but browns are obviously a difficult color to work with, so you make do with orange and peach tones. 
You’re only waiting for about 10 minutes until you hear a knock at your door, and you open it to a smiling Robin. “Hey! Are you ready?” 
“Yeah, let me just grab my purse,” You walk across the room to the kitchen counter to your waiting bag, already packed with your essentials for the night before walking back, key in hand to lock the door behind you.  
The drive over to the hideout is short, and Steve pulls into one of the only parking spaces available. “I thought you said this was a seedy dive bar?” You say, an eyebrow quirking up at all the cars littered around the lot. Steve makes a face in the rearview mirror as he puts his car into park. 
“Yeah, but it’s still one of the only bars in town. There aren’t many places to choose from on a Friday night,” You let out a scoff at that, but shrug it off as you click your seatbelt off and open the door to get out. 
You follow Steve and Robin into the bar, handing your IDs to the bouncer to look at before he gives you a curt nod and lets you through. The bar is pretty packed. It’s not very big, so it seems even more crowed as groups of people hover around the pool tables and high tops around the edges. There’s a small wooden stage near the front, and the light is off. There’s no one playing tonight, you guess. 
“Hey! What do you want to drink? First round’s on Steve!” Robin shouts over the din of the other patrons.  
“Rum and Coke?” You suggest. You don’t really drink much, so it was just the first drink that came to mind. Robin nods in acknowledgement and shouts your order to the waiting bartender. You look around, your hands fidgeting with the strap of your purse over your shoulder as the nerves set in just a touch. You make brief eye contact with anyone you can, trying to pass the time before Robin bumps your hip with hers, hands occupied with drinks. She hands you yours and you take a big gulp, grimacing at the taste. Okay, maybe you won’t order this one again.  
“Steve saw an open table at the back, let’s go!” You nod and follow her through the crowd, taking special care not to bump anyone and spill your drink. Finally, you reach the four-seater table pushed almost completely to the back wall, and you climb into your seat, pushing your purse against the side that’s on the wall to the side.  
“So, what do you think?” Steve asks expectantly, arms gesturing to the scene around you. You give a laugh and an incredulous shake of your head.  
“It’s exactly what I expected, but also the complete opposite at the same time,” Steve shrugs. 
“Yeah, it was for me, too,” He laughs. Just then, Steve’s eyes look over your head, and he stands and waves his arms above his head. “There’s Eddie,” He explains as he sits back down. You heart beats hard in your chest suddenly. Chill the fuck out, Y/N, it’s not a big deal, You think to yourself as you take another big drink from your cup. 
A few minutes go by, and Eddie still hasn’t made his way to the table, you assume because he’s busy getting his drink, so you take a brief glance back and see him, drink in hand, a flirtatious smile on as he talks to a pretty girl standing over by one of the pool tables. She laughs at something he says, her blonde ponytail swinging. You can feel a heat fan over your cheeks as you turn back around, and you try to continue your conversation with Steve and Robin casually.  
Come on, be serious. You don’t even know this guy. He’s just some cute dude that happens to know your friends. It’s not your business who he flirts with— 
“Hey guys!” A shiver shoots up your spine as you feel the sudden warmth of a body right behind you. The unexpected closeness of Eddie as he comes to sit in the chair next to you makes you lose all the nerve you had spent all day building up. “Sorry, it took me so long. I just ran into Chrissy,”  
“Don’t worry man, you’re good. You remember Y/N, right?” Steve gestures to you, and you give him a small smile, looking toward his face but directly at him, looking away quickly to take another drink. 
“Of course, I do. I couldn’t forget a face like that. How’ve you been?” He asks, voice lilting sweetly. You nod exaggeratedly as you swallow, pulling the cup away and setting it down a little too harshly on the grey table, his casual flirtation nearly making you choke. It does nothing to calm your nerves.  
“I’m good! You know, just... hanging out.” You can’t help the awkward overtone to your voice as you avoid eye contact. You glace over at Steve and he shoots you a “Buck up, buttercup!” look. 
“Y/N’s on a soulmate journey!” Steve exclaims suddenly, practically forcing you to confront your fear of looking at Eddie. Your eyes widen to the size of saucers, immediately regretting telling him when you had that conversation the other day. You bow your head low to try to hide the raging heat spreading over your entire body.  
“Oh, really? How’s that going? Where have you been so far?” Robin asks excitedly. “You know, I’ve actually been thinking about doing something like that, but I barely have any money to support myself, let alone to galivant across the country just to look at people,” She says. You lick your lips and nod, intent on keeping your eyes on Robin’s though you can feel Eddie looking toward you with interest. 
“This is actually the first place I’ve been. I’m only gonna be here for six months, then I’ll move on to the next place,” You explain. 
“Well, why Hawkins? This seems like a pretty nowhere place to start,” Eddie asks from beside you, and you shrug. 
“I didn’t really pick it myself. I just threw a dart at a map. Well, several maps,” Your eyes flick up as you remember looking everywhere for a proper map of Indiana before finally settling on a small, printer paper sized one you found on the internet.  
“Ahh,” You let your eyes wander over to Eddie’s hands, which lay on the table, decorated fingers wrapping loosely around his drink, which appears to just be whiskey on the rocks. “What color are you missing?” He asks casually. You freeze up, just for a second, your lips trying to catch up with the short circuit happening in your brain. 
“B-brown... What about you?” You’re tempted to peek, but you want to wait for his answer. You don’t know which answer would make you feel more at ease, but you’re on the edge of your seat in the moment it takes him to answer, and you take another drink to help calm the quick thrum of your heart in your chest, feeling a bit disappointed as you drink down the last dregs. 
“Oh, me? I’m missing Y/E/C.” He says. You can feel his eyes on you, and your quick glance to Steve and Robin give you encouragement, both of them practically begging you to look at him, and you take the leap. 
You look up to Eddie’s face, letting your eyes meander up his face until your eyes settle on his. They’re a rich black color, and you’re so close to looking away, the dejection building in your core when it happens.  
Your parents were right, the color really does swirl into place. You watch, mouth falling slightly open as the black transforms into this warm, dark color you can’t describe. How could you? It’s the first time you’ve ever seen it. Brown. This is brown. You let out a little laugh as more brown starts settling into the scene around you. The tables, the bar, the water stains on the plaster ceiling—all different shades of brown, and it’s immediately the prettiest color you’ve ever seen.  
“Oh, my god.” You manage to mutter. It’s all so overwhelming you feel like you could cry, but Eddie’s gaze on you keeps you steady. His smile widens, pure joy glinting in those beautiful eyes. 
“I had a feeling, but... I didn’t think it was possible,” Eddie breathes as he scans over every feature of your face. You scoff, thinking about all the time you’ve spent over the past few days thinking about him. 
“Me too,” You laugh. You reach a tentative hand forward, and Eddie takes it midair, guiding it to his face. You feel your skin vibrate as you touch him, your thumb gently swiping over his cheek. Your reverie is interrupted by Steve and Robin, who start yelling across from you. 
“WE’VE GOT SOULMATES OVER HERE!” The whole place erupts in applause, and you and Eddie giggle as the whole place starts chanting, “KISS! KISS! KISS! KISS!” There’s a hint of hesitation, but then a playful glint in his eyes as Eddie looks back to you. 
“Would that be okay?” He asks, brows furrowing as he reads your reaction. You give a little nod, briefly pulling your bottom lip between your teeth. 
“Might as well. Looks like we were made to,” You muse, batting your lashes flirtatiously. Eddie gives you a quick toothy smile before settling his hands on your face, and it’s like time moves to a standstill as your lips touch, gently at first, to test the waters, but then you slot your mouth onto his fully as the electricity streaks through your body. His lips move perfectly against yours, and everything around you becomes white noise as you throw your arms around his neck, pulling him closer. 
As you part, you’re both grinning like love drunk idiots, giggling as your foreheads rest against each other. “A dart on a map, huh?” Eddie muses. You shrug, laughing again at the sheer insanity of it all. 
“Yeah. A dart on a fucking map!” Eddie’s lashes barely brush yours, his warm, sweet breath fanning over your face. 
“Thank God for that fucking dart, then.” His lips search for yours again, and you meet him in the middle with a smile that has your cheeks aching.  
1 in 7 billion has never seemed better. 
686 notes · View notes
yelena-bellova · 1 year
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Twenty Years Later: Joel Miller x F!Reader - Chapter Two
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Chapter Two: Strangers in the Night
Plot: Joel and Y/n try their hardest to ignore and avoid their past while waiting on the cover of night to leave the QZ.
Warnings: M for violence, gore, language, allusions to sex, alcohol, unwanted advances (16+)
Word Count: 6.9k
A/N: Okay, let me just say, did not expect such a big reaction to this little 2.2k fic I thought up randomly. You guys wanted a series, so here’s a series. It’ll be 16+ from here so please specify your age in your bio if you’d like to be tagged. I’m really excited to write this one, hope y’all enjoy it! It's gonna be a wild frickin' ride...
——————————
May 9th, 2002, Austin Texas
It was unseasonably warm for spring in Austin. Summer was making an early entrance and driving everyone indoors. The bars were packed each night, but especially on the weekends. Something about the heat always inspired people to drink more.
The Miller brothers were seated at a table in the far corner of Dane’s, each nursing a Budweiser. Despite it being a Saturday, they’d worked overtime on a garage apartment conversion. It was in Joel’s neighborhood and he needed the money. Jobs hadn’t been ripe for picking lately, in going the extra mile with the clients he did have, he could bank on a few referrals.
“We’re runnin’ short on the 2x4s,” Joel told his brother, “And it wouldn’t hurt to-“
“Dude,” Tommy made a slicing motion with his hand, “You’re off the clock. Switch off for a while.”
“I’m just trying to get ahead,” Joel replied.
Tommy smiled, lounging in his chair, “Look, you’ve got two modes: work mode and dad mode. And guess what? You never come out of either. It’s a Friday night, you’ve got a sitter, why not just try being a single, not-offensively unattractive, guy?”
Joel’s eyebrows were permanently furrowed, especially around conversations like this. Tommy meant well, but he’d been trying to get Joel to find something outside of work and his daughter for years. It wasn’t happening.
“So you’re sayin’ I should focus less on keeping a roof over my daughter’s head and makin’ sure she’s happy?” Joel asked, leaning back in his chair, “I get that right?”
Tommy chuckled and shook his head, “I’m just saying…you’re gettin’ more and more like an old man the longer you’re by yourself. Wouldn’t hurt to find someone that makes you happy.”
It was easy to ignore Tommy’s ramblings, but Joel couldn’t deny there was some truth to what he was saying. After Sarah’s mom up and left them, he kept his heart guarded from the world. Sarah and Tommy were the only ones he had the space to love. No, not the space. He had all the capacity in the world to hold someone else close to his soul, he was just too afraid of getting hurt again.
A few feet away at the bar, Y/n twirled her wine glass in her hand. Navigating a new city and a new job was taking it out of her. There had been no catalyst in her decision to move to Austin. She wasn’t running from a bad relationship nor did she need space from her family, she’d just wanted a change. So far, aside from the random heat wave, she was enjoying herself. The people were friendly, the neighborhood was quiet…she could see herself eventually calling the place home.
As she enjoyed her own company, a muscly man approached the seat next to her. He didn’t even do her the courtesy of asking if it was taken.
He flashed a pearly smile at Y/n, “Havin’ a good night?”
“Mm-hm,” she nodded, not looking up from her glass.
“Haven’t seen you around here,” the man continued, “You new to town?”
Y/n politely smiled, wishing he’d taken the hint. “Sure.”
“Findin’ your way around alright,” he put his elbows on the bar, indicating he wasn’t going anywhere, “Or are you thinkin’ you need a tour guide? Someone to show you around? Help make you feel a little more comfortable?”
Y/n was fighting the urge not to laugh, she’d seen dogs in heat more subtle than this guy. “I’m doing fine on my own, thanks,” she replied, her will to smile fading with each second he stayed.
“I don’t know,” the guy dragged his fingers up and down the condensation on his beer bottle, “You seem a little lost to me, darlin’. I got a hog outside, we could head out…night scene’s pretty wild here.”
Y/n took another sip of her wine, “Not really a wild kind of gal.”
The man’s lingering stare was beginning to make Y/n’s skin crawl. It was like he was staring straight through her clothes. He leaned in to her, his arm grazing hers, as if the close proximity was imperative to what he was about to say.
“I got this theory that inside every woman,” he lowered his voice, “There’s a wild girl just waitin’ to come out. She just needs the right cowboy,” he paused, a smile spreading across his lips, “To let her loose.”
Concealing her annoyance, Y/n looked down at her glass bashfully. She peeked back up out of her eyelashes, “What’s your name?”
“Jacob,” he answered.
“Jacob,” she repeated sweetly, leaning in closer to him, “Going around trying to prove how big your dick is ain’t gonna make any woman want to touch it.”
Jacob pulled back a little, shocked at both the comment and how easily being foul mouthed came to this woman. Y/n scrunched her nose and gave a sugary smile before moving to get up from her stool.
Jacob grabbed her shoulder, not prepared to lose the battle. “Hang on there, sweetheart.”
“Let go of me,” Y/n was quick to say.
“I don’t think you quite understand what I’m offerin’ you here…”
“Let,” Y/n gritted her teeth, raising her voice slightly, “Go of me.”
Jacob began to close the space between their faces, “What’re you gonna do if I ain’t ready to say goodbye to ya yet?”
“Hey.”
Y/n turned to the two men who had approached while she was fending Jacob off. The one with the mustache swung his fist and landed a shiner on Jacob’s nose. The whole bar gasped as he stumbled backwards, clutching his now bleeding face. The mystery man placed an arm in front of Y/n, making himself the barrier between Jacob’s advances and her safety.
Once Jacob caught his footing, revealing just how tipsy he was, he clumsily stalked back towards them. The second man stepped forward and effortlessly threw a punch to Jacob’s abdomen, knocking him off his feet and to the ground. The other patrons actually clapped and cheered at the knockout.
The man shielding Y/n and his friend grabbed Jacob’s arms and pulled him to his knees. Dane, the owner, came out from around the counter and marched towards the door. The men dragged Jacob through the bar, taking no care to his hands and feet as they knocked into chairs and tables. With Dane holding the door open, they threw him out, earning another round of cheers from the bar.
Y/n watched it all with a hand over her mouth. The whole thing had left her more anxious than she cared to admit.
Her two saviors made their way through the room, earning pats on the back from most of the patrons.
“Are you okay?” The man with the mustache asked when they reached her.
“Yeah,” Y/n answered, trying to hide how her hands was shaking, “Are you?”
“Not the worst we’ve seen,” the clean shaven guy smiled, flexing his bruised hand, “But I think you’re gonna have to take a shower to get that creep’s touch off ya.”
Y/n chortled, the feeling of his fingers digging into her skin hadn’t left yet. “I’m really sorry you had to step in,” she said earnestly, “I’m not great with following through on my smack talk.”
“Nah, you were holding your own,” the cheerier of the two men laughed.
“Hey, can I buy you guys a round?” Y/n asked, “It’s the least I can do.”
“There’s no need,” the quieter guy shook his head.
“No, I want to,” Y/n insisted, looking between the two of them.
The one who had done most of the talking so far was the first to relent. “Fine, but we’re spotting your next glass. Just to try and restore the ever-deteriorating reputation of men.”
Y/n laughed heartily for the first time of the night. She liked them.
“Hey, Dane,” the talkative man flagged down the bartender and turned to Y/n, “What’re you drinking?”
Y/n held up her dwindling glass of rosé.
“Another rosé for the rosebud,” the man finished, winking at Y/n in a way that felt more playful than flirtatious, “I’m Tommy, by the way.”
“Y/n,” she took his extended hand and shook it before turning to the other man.
“Joel,” he pressed his palm to hers.
Y/n smiled, her eyes lingering on the man as they shook hands. There was a peace to him that she already knew she liked.
Y/n ended up at Tommy and Joel’s table, each of them sipping a victory drink and talking up a storm. It was one of the easiest conversations any of them had ever had.
“So you just picked up one day and,” Tommy made a swooping gesture, “Came to Austin?”
Y/n shrugged, “Just needed a change.”
Tommy whistled, “That’s brave.”
“I mean, it’s Austin,” Y/n chuckled, “It’s not New York,” she took a sip of the free rosé, “What about you two?”
“Nah, we’ve been here forever,” Joel answered, holding his beer to his lips.
Tommy raised his bottle to his brother, “Can’t even get this fucker to take a vacation somewhere.”
“Workaholic or homebody?” Y/n asked.
Joel was inhaling to answer when Tommy spoke up, “Both.”
“Nothin’ wrong with working hard or staying home,” Joel replied, throwing back a swig.
“Nah,” Tommy replied, smirking, “Only when you do it.”
Joel glared out the sides of his eyes at his brother. Y/n laughed against the rim of her glass.
“Well,” Tommy leaned against the table, “If you ever need a tour guide, we’re at your disposal. We’ll show you the real grimy hole in the wall places. Best food or beer in the city are always in the places you’d least expect it.”
Contrary to Jacob’s thinly veiled advances, Y/n took Tommy and Joel for exactly how they presented themselves. They were funny, they were gentlemanly, and they were the first people in Austin she’d met who she felt truly comfortable around.
Joel, who was naturally more quiet than his brother, had never felt more lost for words. He was trying to keep himself in check considering the happenstance of their meeting, but all he wanted to do was look at Y/n. When she laughed, something inside his stomach twisted. When their eyes met, his chest tightened. There was something about being around this girl that felt very, very different than anyone else.
“Well,” Y/n checked her watch, catching the late hour, “I’ve got the morning shift tomorrow and I can’t be too hungover. Thank you both for the company and the wine,” she smiled at Joel, “It was a big improvement on how the night started.”
“Yeah, we’d better go too,” Joel announced, rising to his feet with Tommy, “Gotta get a head start tomorrow before the storm moves in.”
Tommy gestured to his big brother, smiling at Y/n, “What’d I tell you?”
“I gotta side with your brother here,” Y/n smiled, scrunching her face a little, “Everyone needs a break. That’s kinda what weekends are for”
“See?” Tommy said, “Maybe you’ll listen to her.”
Joel was on the verge of busting out in to a grin. “Not my problem if you two are lazy,” he shot back.
Y/n and Tommy each gaped with laughter. Joel smiled, he’d wanted to hear her laugh one more time before they parted.
“Well, you two have restored the name of ‘men’ quite admirably,” Y/n grabbed her purse, “Thank you for what you did, really. If you hadn’t stepped in, tonight would have ended much worse.”
Tommy shook his head, “Don’t mention it. Just learn how to throw a punch,” he slapped his hand against Joel’s shoulder, “And I think we’ll both sleep better at night.”
“I’ll get on that,” Y/n chuckled. She wasn’t sure if it was the kinship she felt or the rosé had simply relaxed her, but she reached over to Tommy and gave him a one-armed hug.
“See ya around, Rosebud,” Tommy said, keeping his hand respectfully high up on her shoulders.
“See ya,” Y/n replied, pulling back to look at Joel. She wasn’t sure what she expected to happen, only that she wanted to memorize his face before she left. “Goodnight,” she said with a small smile.
Joel tried to ignore how his heart was thudding in his chest. “‘Night,” he replied.
His eyes followed her all the way to the door, till she stepped out into the steamy evening air. He wasn’t sure why he had to urge to follow her.
“You,” Tommy gripped Joel’s shoulder a little tighter, “Are fucked.”
Joel rolled his eyes at his little brother’s laughter, “The hell’re you talking about?”
Tommy fell back down in his chair, a hand resting on his chest, “You were fuckin’ smitten with her.”
“‘Smitten?’” Joel cringed, taking his seat and his beer, “What’re you, 14?”
“Fine, hot for, taken with, enamored, mesmerized,” Tommy chuckled, “Whatever you wanna call it…you liked her.”
Joel shrugged and took another drink, “‘Course I liked her. You liked her too.”
“Not like you,” Tommy shook his head, still grinning, “I think she liked you too.”
Pushing down the way his stomach jumped when Tommy said that, he glanced over at the door again. He looked back to the table, checking to see if she’d left anything. Maybe she’d have to come back. What would he do if she did? Would he ask for her number? Or was that too forward? He didn’t want anything he did to remind her at all of the asshat they’d tossed out-
“She didn’t leave anything, dude.”
Tommy’s voice brought Joel out of his thoughts. He hadn’t realized how long he’d been staring at Y/n’s empty seat. There was no reason for her to come back.
“You’re fucked,” Tommy brought the conversation full circle, patting his brother’s shoulder and taking a drink.
Joel hid his disappointment, just like his infatuation; well, but not well enough. He looked down at his bottle, “Doesn’t matter. We’re not gonna see her again.”
Tommy shrugged, “Austin ain’t that big.”
Outside, Y/n was making the three minute walk down the street to her apartment complex. Her mind was no longer focused on the douche whose name she was already forgetting, all she could think of was how Joel smiled like he had a secret. How his laughter was reserved only for when he found something hilarious. How whether he was sitting beside his brother or punching out a handsy creep, he was completely relaxed. How his brown eyes were so warm, one gaze into them had given her goosebumps…
Y/n shook her head at herself, completely thrown for a loop. One encounter with one guy and she felt like there was some invisible string tugging harder with every inch of distance she put between herself and the bar. The chances of bumping into Tommy and Joel again in a city as big as Austin were slim. It was a reality she had to face. It was just one of those meetings that left you feeing like you’d experienced true magic. She was saddened at the thought of never sitting across from Joel again.
Into the night, with a total distance of seven minutes unbeknownst between them, Joel and Y/n each retired and prepared for their respective early mornings. Joel paid the neighbor who’d watched Sarah, Y/n called and checked in on her sister, who’d just had a baby. Joel kissed his daughter goodnight, Y/n finished up a load of laundry. They each changed into their pajamas, brushed their teeth, and turned out the lights. It was then, in the sweet space between sleep and consciousness that they let their minds drift back to each other….
—————————
2023, Boston
Of course it was raining. Rain made everything easier.
Joel, Tess, Y/n and Ellie trudged through the streets of what was once downtown Boston. Y/n kept a hand on Ellie’s back at all times, untrusting of both the people around them and the ones they were traveling with.
Even with the utter chaos they were in the middle of, Y/n’s mind was overtaken by the holes being burned into the back of her head. Joel’s stare was unfaltering. She wanted to turn around and scream at him, but that would garner the attention they were trying so hard not to attract. That was fine, she had more than enough anger and more than enough time to let him feel it.
Joel, whose every move was made with vigilante like precision, was struggling to keep his thoughts in order. The past was so easy to put behind you when you never had to look at it. Faced with the person who knew it all, had seen it all…the second he’d laid eyes on Y/n, it had all come flooding back. He had to get himself in check. Y/n’s unfiltered hatred was helping him there.
They made it to Joel and Tess’ apartment without any trouble, the four of them filing down the narrow hallway. Y/n pulled as far away from Joel as possible while they waited for Tess to unlock the door, which wasn’t very far. Once it was open, Joel impatiently waved for Ellie to enter, saving the same glare for Y/n. Ellie entered apprehensively, while Y/n knew enough to know that they were Joel and Tess’ leverage. Without them, they couldn’t get their battery. They were safe, for the time being.
“Give us a minute, all right?” Tess stated more than asked, heading back out to the hall.
“What the fu-“ Ellie started, the door silenced the last two letters.
Y/n put a finger to her lips, standing beside the door and listening to the other side of the door. Tess and Joel were discussing which route to take, something that infuriated her. There was only one child in their party, she refused to let Joel make her anything other than an equal.
She threw down her backpack and threw the door open. “If you two are planing on excluding me from the planning side of things, let me know now so I can strangle you both,” she said, smiling sweetly.
“You wanna tell us what we’re really doing with this kid?” Tess fired back.
“Not particularly,” Yn replied.
“Then you don’t get a voice here,” Tess looked to Joel, “We leave after dark. Stay with them.”
Joel took a step forward as his partner walked off, “Wait, why do I have to — Tess! Tess!”
Tess turned the corner of the hall without ever breaking stride.
Joel sighed loudly, eventually looking over to Y/n.
“She’s lovely,” Y/n snarked, earning a signature Miller scowl.
Joel nodded towards the door and Y/n slipped back inside, he kept an overly safe distance between them. Y/n unzipped her backpack and grabbed her first aid kit, sitting down at Joel’s table to tend to her bullet wound. Joel shrugged off his pack and threw himself on the couch. Ellie was splitting the distance between them, holding a large book in her hands.
“So,” the girl started, “Who’s Bill and Frank?”
Joel looked up confused, as if he couldn’t imagine how she could have possibly heard anything from the other side of the door.
“Oh, come on, Tool Time,” Y/n chortled, as she opened the bottle of disinfectant, “This whole place is paper thin.”
“The radio’s a smuggling code, right?” Ellie asked, “60s song, they don’t have anything new. 70s, they got new stuff. What’s 80’s?”
Joel got off the couch and ripped the book out of Ellie’s hands, throwing it to the side. He glanced over at Y/n, who was struggling to keep her grunts quiet as she cleaned her wound. A twinge of pain ran through his chest as she scrunched up her face, trying to keep her breaths steady. His fingers automatically twitched to help her, but it wouldn’t actually help anyone. Instead, he fought his instincts walked back to the couch and laid down.
“What are you doing?” Ellie asked.
“Killin’ time,” Joel said, his drawl particularly noticeable.
“What am I supposed to do?”
“I’m sure you’ll figure that out,” his eyes were already closed, just like the conversation.
Y/n began to use a q-tip to spread antiseptic cream over the wound, the cooling sensation dulling the pain.
Ellie took back the book and walked past Joel, “Your watch is broken.”
Four little words froze Y/n, hunched over the table with her supplies. She didn’t have to look to know that Joel’s eyes were open again. It was the second time today that they’d been perfectly in sync. The first was pulling their guns on one another and, to be honest, Y/n would have preferred to stare down the barrel of his pistol. Bullets were simple and easy to dodge, memories were more cunning and hurt significantly more.
Y/n finished dressing her wound, zipping the kit back up and throwing it in her backpack. She laid her jacket out to dry on the back of the chair and finally took a good look at her surroundings. She couldn’t have chosen a place more opposite to Joel’s 3-bed 3-bath in Austin. The floors creaked, the walls were stained, and the ceilings were uncomfortably low. Home was a fluid concept in the world they lived in, and the kind Y/n was thinking of was lost entirely.
“He’s fun,” Ellie grunted from her seat at the window.
Y/n scoffed, “You have no idea.”
If they’d be using the cover of night to travel, Y/n knew Joel had the right idea to sleep now. She pulled out a sweater from her backpack, bunched it up and set it on the ground across from the couch. Without any blankets, she made the call that a nearby rug would be the next best thing. She shook it out and placed it below the sweater.
“Try and get some sleep,” Y/n instructed Ellie, “You’re gonna need it.”
Ellie simply hummed and continued paging through the book. Y/n slipped under the dirty rug and sighed, she’d slept in worse places for much longer…
She took the moment of peace to finally take a good look at Joel. His eyebrows still furrowed as he slept, as if he was in a constant state of disapproval with the world. The rest of his face was softer, a strange contrast, but so very him. His chest rose and fell in a perfect rhythm. It was hard for Y/n not to remember how it felt to lay with her ear against his heart, lifting and lowering with him…
The QZ was small, and stories got around. Y/n had known for a while that Joel was in Boston. She’d also heard the stories of the things he’d done, the people he’d killed, and just how far he’d go to guarantee his survival. Despite not owing him anything, Y/n had refused to believe them. She adamantly denied the possibility that she could have ever loved a man capable of such hideous acts. The Cordecyps had changed them all in different ways, but she had to believe that Joel was still Joel…
————————————
“Hey.”
A mumble and a boot kick to the shoulder had Y/n startling awake. She rolled over to see Ellie, still sitting by the window with the book in her lap.
“How do you know him?”
Y/n squinted and sat up, her joints cracking as she stretched her limbs. The sky outside was pitch black, clearly she’d needed more sleep than she thought.
“He’s an…” she began to say, the complexity of the situation hitting her all over again. There was only one answer to give that wouldn’t invite any more questions. “I was friends with his brother a long time ago.”
Ellie’s seemed to accept it, “Where’re you from?”
“Texas.”
The girl’s eyes widened, “You lived in Texas?”
“Just for a little while,” Y/n replied, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes,
Ellie looked down at her hands and then out the window, “I’ve never been out that far.”
Y/n sighed, thinking about what it might be like to grow up never having known what the world used to be like. “You’re not missing much, kid,” she lied. She’d have gone back to Austin in a heartbeat, if it was at all possible.
“What’s ‘rosebud?’”
Y/n’s body went cold, as if she’d just been plunged into ice water, memories slamming into her like waves. A glass of rosé and belly laughter, a backyard game of football, soft lips whispering sweet nothings against her ear…
She looked over at Ellie calmly, “What?”
The girl nodded towards Joel, who was still peacefully sleeping. “He kept mumbling the word ‘rosebud,’” she replied, “Thought maybe it was a code word or something.”
It did serve as a codeword, containing secrets, laughter, and all the love that had once existed in Y/n’s world. Now the mere utterance cut her worse than any blade could.
“If it is,” Y/n got to her feet, not wanting to be anywhere near the word, “I don’t know what it means.”
Joel woke then, startling without any real physicality. He stared up at the ceiling, dazed from his dreams. No, nightmares. That’s what they were.
“You mumble in your sleep,” Ellie said, announcing her presence, “Something about ‘rosebud.’”
If that didn’t wake him up, nothing could. His eyes flitted across the room, looking for the woman who owned every inch of the word. When Joel couldn’t find her, he pushed up on one arm and found her sitting at his kitchen table with her back turned to him.
In his subconscious, he’d seen her as she used to be. Her eyes full of light, her smile like pure sunshine, laughter pouring out of her with a freedom so few people allowed themselves. He’d felt her soft skin against his, felt her lips pressed to his jawline, right between his neck and his ear. He’d known her for the first time in twenty years, only to wake up and find her ghost.
Joel swung his legs over the couch and rose, his knees and back aching. Getting older in a post-apocalyptic world felt extra cruel. He ventured over to the table, ready to test the waters and see just how bad of a time he was in for.
Y/n sighed in annoyance as Joel took the chair next to her. She needed distance she wasn’t going to get, from him and all that he reminded her of.
They sat in the most awkward silence either of them had ever known.
Joel was the first to break it, “You get some sleep?”
Y/n glared out the corner of her eyes at him, the first words he spoke to her after their confrontation and that was the first thing he said?
Joel’s chest tightened at her poisoned stare, he wasn’t going to get an answer. “Wound okay?”
“This whole thing’ll go a lot easier if you stop pretending to give a shit about me,” Y/n said quietly, the sharpness of her tone cutting through the volume, “We both know you don’t.”
The walls weren’t coming down. Joel knew that. He didn’t want them down. But after seeing her, full of energy and joy, he had to check and see if there was any bit of that woman left. His eyes scanned her skin, so many scars and scrapes where there had once been a smooth surface. Her hair was dry, streaks of oil laced like highlights through the strands. Her nails were chipped and caked with dirt underneath. But most noticeably, there were two prominent frown lines across her cheeks. That let Joel know that the woman he’d once loved was absolutely gone.
“What happened to Tommy?” Y/n asked. She couldn’t help herself, but she kept her tone frosty.
“Sent a message three weeks back,” Joel answered, his fist fidgeting against the table, “Haven’t heard anything.”
Y/n didn’t want to take any strolls with Joel down memory lane, but Tommy was…Tommy. She couldn’t deny that she still cared about him deeply. “Do you know where he is?”
“Wyoming,” Joel answered, looking past her eyes at the wall. He didn’t think he could handle speaking about his brother to her, of all people.
“Oh,” she said, “So you’re completely crazy now.”
That earned her a hardened gaze, as if Joel had anything else for her.
“I’ve never been on the other side of the Wall,” Ellie spoke up, “Look how dark it is.”
Y/n got up first, smoothing her tank top back down and leaning against the wall near the door. Joel followed, retaking his seat on the couch. They both pondered the same thing separately: how much life Ellie had missed out on just by being born in the wrong decade.
“You guys go out there a lot?” Ellie asked Joel.
“I guess,” he answered.
“When was the last time?”
“Maybe a year,” Joel quickly replied, he wasn’t enjoying all the questions, “What’s it matter?”
“But you know where to go,” Ellie clarified, looking too much like a kid, “So we’re gonna be okay.”
It was a fair question, and Joel couldn’t fault her for being scared. Fear was all she’d ever known.
“Yeah,” he answered, significantly softer than his last one.
Y/n’s eyes grazed the window, spotting the plastic butterfly that clung to the glass. After all these years, Joel had managed to keep it. It took all the self-discipline she had not to let her tears fall.
“So what’s the deal with you anyway,” Joel asked Ellie, “You some kind of bigwig’s daughter or somethin’?”
Both Ellie and Y/n knowingly smirked to themselves. “Something like that,” Ellie replied, “Oh, the radio came on while you were sleeping.”
“What?” Joel snapped to attention, leaning forward, “What was the song?
“He kept sayin’ like, “wake me up before you go-go?” Ellie answered, making Y/n and Joel feel much much older.
Joel knew what that meant, and it was nothing good. “Shit,” he whispered to himself.
Ellie’s smirk spread across her face, “Gotcha. 80’s means trouble. Code broken.”
Joel got to his feet, having used his patience up earlier in the day. “Listen-“
Y/n was between him and Ellie in a flash, sticking out a hand towards Joel. She was off limits, even for a light scolding. Luckily, the door opened up before anything could be said. Tess had returned.
“The spot under Lancaster looks good,” she reported, turning to Ellie after, “You got a jacket in your pack?”
“Yeah,” Ellie responded.
“Okay, get it. It’s time to go.”
Y/n stuffed her sweater back in backpack and went to retrieve her now-dry jacket. It had been a long time since she’d gone outside of the QZ, she couldn’t decide whether she was terrified or happy to step outside the fence.
Joel on the other hand felt like he couldn’t move. Between the fear over his brother’s safety, being close to Y/n once again and the daunting task ahead of them, he wanted to pause it all for a moment. Tess throwing his jacket at him was a good reminder that he didn’t get to take minutes.
As Y/n went to the window to check Ellie, her eye caught the butterfly in the window again. Much like ‘Rosebud,’ there was another name that she never said. She could practically see it weaved into the fine details of the creature, the bright blue against the dark black. When Joel’s back was turned. Y/n pulled the cling off the window and shoved it in her backpack. If they were going to do this, she needed to feel strong enough to do it. She’d give it back to Joel and face his wrath when the deed was done.
The four of them made it out and into the underground tunnels, landing in a lesser frequented area of the QZ. Joel climbed out first and scanned their surroundings, helping to pull Ellie out after. Y/n came through next, though Joel knew better than the extend his hand to her, and finally, Tess.
“Holy shit,” Ellie remarked, spinning around to take it all in, “I’m actually outside.”
Not half a second later, a helicopter made its round over them, searchlights shining off it. Tess pulled Ellie in and crouched behind a large piece of debris.
“Okay, we’re gonna take the left edge around the buffer zone,” Tess explained, “You stay close and you follow my lead.”
“Yeah, yeah, of course,” Ellie nodded in understanding, glancing over to Y/n as if to get approval. Y/n nodded back, placing momentary trust that Tess would protect the girl.
“Same goes for you,” Joel said from beside her, his voice low.
Y/n glared over her shoulder, “I really don’t think you want me where you can’t see me.”
“Let’s go,” Tess ordered.
The four of them crawled under an abandoned school bus with Joel bringing up the rear. Walking while crouched was hard, but they managed their best and paused behind a car when a FEDRA patrol vehicle passed by. Once it was clear, they made their way through a rusted, metal pipe, stopping when the chopper passed over them again. Y/n caught a peek at Ellie’s face as the light shone on them, she looked terrified. Through her own nerves, Y/n reached over and took Ellie’s hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.
Joel watched the whole thing, if he wanted a glimpse of the woman he’d once known, he’d gotten it. Her heart was still there.
Their team hurried out of the pipe, rushing to hide behind another big piece of debris. A storm was starting, the lightning acting as temporary lighting for their path. Joel was leading the way when their presence was detected.
“Hey,” a FEDRA soldier shouted, “Hey! Don’t, don’t, don’t move.”
Joel hurriedly looked around for more, pushing Ellie behind him. He held his hands up in surrender, along with Y/n, Ellie and Tess. If they wanted to get out of this, they needed to play along.
The FEDRA soldier opened the visor of his helmet, getting a look at Joel. “You gotta be shittin’ me…”
“Okay, let’s talk this out,” Joel said calmly.
“Turn around,” the soldier ignored him.
“Hold on-“
“Get on your fuckin’ knees,” the soldier yelled, “Get on your fuckin’ knees!”
Joel wasn’t giving up, “Now, hold on-“
“What did I fuckin’ tell you, man? I said stay the fuck home,” he pointed to the ground, “Get on your knees!”
Y/n knew if he fought any harder, he was going to get them all killed. Taking matters into her own hands, she dropped. “Ellie,” she said calmly, “Get down.”
“Just get on your knees,” Tess said to Joel, “Just get on your knees.”
Joel listened and kneeled between Ellie and Tess, turning his back to the soldier. Ellie finally followed Yn’s directions and got down next to Y/n.
“Listen, you let us do this run,” Tess bargained, “We’ll split the cards with you.”
The soldier wasn’t having it, “Oh, will you?”
Y/n’s breaths quickened, knowing their chances of escape were slim. There had to be something to do. If she gave herself up, would he let Tess and Joel leave with Ellie? She didn’t particularly feel like dying, but Ellie was too important to compromise. They could get her the rest of the way.
“Hands on your head, eyes forward,” the soldier instructed. It was the eyes forward bit that bothered Joel the most. They wanted to control what they couldn’t even see.
“Hands on your head,” the soldier screamed, startling them all into doing it. He came up behind Tess, holding a device to her neck. Checking to see if they were infected.
Y/n’s heart stopped in her chest. Shit.
“Really, man?” Tess complained.
The soldier was undeterred, “Yep, we’re doin’ this by the book.”
Ellie nudged Y/n with her boot, signaling she knew what was coming. Y/n wasn’t sure how to offer her any assurance that they’d be okay.
“Unauthorized exit,” the soldier reported, “They’ll hang you for that.”
“Fine,” Joel tried again, “Everythin’ off this run and half off of all the pills.”
Their voices faded in Y/n’s ears. If she could move quick enough, she could spin around and shoot the soldier before he knew what was happening. It would give Tess and Joel a few seconds to get away.
Before Y/n could make a decision, Ellie stole her move and stabbed the soldier in the leg.
“Ellie!” Y/n and Tess cried in unison.
The soldier was momentarily dazed, stumbling backwards and trying to figure out where the injury was. Y/n took the opportunity to shove Ellie behind her. Joel did the same, jumping to his feet and standing in front of Y/n. It was pure instinct.
“Get out of the fuckin’ way,” the soldier yelled, aiming his gun past the adults.
Joel could talk his way out of a lot, but this looked grim. That didn’t mean he wasn’t going to try.
“We can fix this,” he tried, holding up his hands as a barrier between them and the soldier.
The soldier was done listening to their pathetic attempts. “Move.”
Joel didn’t budge.
“Move.”
Y/n had been on the recieving end of a lot of guns, held by people who thought that God had abandoned the post-apocalyptic warland and it was their job to fill His seat. But the military regulated weaponry, the uniform, the expressionless face that wouldn’t fill with guilt the moment its body pulled the trigger.
It transported her back twenty years.
And she knew Joel was there with her.
He surged forward, letting out a gutteral cry as he tackled the soldier to the ground. He climbed atop him, pinning him, and began to throw one merciless punch after the other. The crunching of bone and squishing of flesh formed an awful, perfect, rhythm.
While Ellie watched and felt something awaken within her, Y/n felt something die. She watched the man she’d known in her past life as loving and tender become a necessary monster. People thought mourning was only for those who left the earth, but there were plenty of dead souls still breathing. If there was any debate as to whether or not her version of Joel Miller was truly gone, the proof was now and forever burned into Y/n’s mind. Someone else now inhabited in his body.
When the job was done, Joel sat heaving over the man’s body, looking down at his bloody and bruised fist. It was the closest he could ever come to avenging her. When he looked up, his eyes first fell on Ellie, who didn’t seem to mind the violence at all. It seemed she actually liked it.
Y/n’s eyes told a different story.
A well-timed lightning strike lit her up, and Joel saw tears pooling below her y/e/c pupils. Her chest rose and fell rapidly, anxiety mixing with terror. Joel knew exactly what she was thinking about him and for a singular second, he felt guilt. He felt guilt for causing her pain, for forcing her to see him as anything other than the man she’d known.
It passed as quick as it came. It had to.
Tess grabbed the dropped scanner and read the bright red screen. Y/n hurried back to the present pulled Ellie by her jacket away from Tess.
“No, no,” Ellie yelled, “No, I’m not sick!”
“Joel,” Tess called, beginning to panic.
“She’s not sick,” Y/n backed Ellie up, “She’s clean!”
“Joel,” Tess yelled again, putting space between Y/n and her.
Ellie pulled her jacket sleeve up to reveal her arm, “Look! Look! This is three weeks old! Nobody lasts more than a day! Does this look a day old to you?”
Tess examined the bite site, it looked more like a bad scar than an infectious wound.
“You would have fuckin’ killed me!” Ellie said in horror.
“I should fucking kill you,” Tess bit back, looking up at Y/n, “What the hell’s Marlene trying to pull?!”
“It’s true,” Y/n said, keeping one hand over her pistol in case Tess didn’t listen, “She’s clean.”
She looked past Tess’ shoulder and over to Joel, who was still watching her. It was a long shot to get him of all people to listen to her, but now, she was happy to bank on their history in hopes that he’d believe her.
“I swear it,” Y/n held a hand up, her eyes digging into Joel’s, begging for him to not raise his gun.
Joel stopped short at Y/n’s vulnerability, he was shaken in every direction just from the last thirty seconds. He felt his will to argue with her slipping away.
“They’re gonna catch us if we don’t run,” Ellie stated, she wasn’t wrong. They could argue elsewhere and keep their lives.
“Joel, we gotta move,” Tess called, interrupting the stare-off between Y/n and him, “We gotta move, Joel.”
Ellie and Tess were already making their way to the fence, but Y/n and Joel stayed a second longer. Neither one had much credibility with the other, not after the last time they’d been together. But at the moment, Joel had two choices. He could either die at FEDRA’s hands, or he could follow the woman he’d once trusted most in the world and believe her one more time.
He chose the latter, though he was far from believing.
Joel picked up the soldier’s rifle and gestured for Y/n to move, the two of them ran after Tess and Ellie, who were already slipping through a hole in the chained fence. Y/n pushed through it, coming to stand on the other side of the QZ’s limits and pausing for Joel. She knew he trusted her as far as he could throw her and she wasn’t totally confidant in turning her back to him. She waited till he came through and the two of them ran after Tess and Ellie, into the night and into the unknown…
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megalony · 4 months
Text
Sick Day
This is a rather short Evan Buckley imagine based on an anon request. I hope you all like it, I was struggling with what ideas to write today.
Taglist: @lunaticspoem@sj-thefanthefan@hellsdragon@im-an-adult-ish@crazylittlethingg@allauraleigh@onceuponadetectivedemigod@ceres27@avyannadawn@noonenuts@sleepylunarwolf@coverupps@justagirlthatlovedtoread @musicistheway @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @luula @missdreamofendless @bradleybeachbabe @woderfulkawaii @topguncultleader @amberpanda99 @daggersquadphantom @marvel-and-chicago-fan @angryknightstatesmantrash @minjix @lyjen @kmc1989
911 Masterlist
Summary: When (Y/n) isn't well, Evan takes the day off to look after her.
Enjoy.
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"Come on, as if you have to ask what I'll have," A grin pulled at Evan's lips and he downed the last dregs of coffee before he leaned over and switched the tv off. He didn't know why he turned in on in the first place, probably out of habit because he had only watched five minutes of the news and now it was time to leave.
Evan had the skill of being able to down his first morning coffee in less than three minutes and he needed a coffee to wake himself up, especially on the days when he was driving to work. When he did the early shifts he preferred it when Eddie picked him up on the way so he didn't have to drive. But Eddie was only down for a short shift today and Evan was in for the full twenty four hours. He had to drive so he could get himself home tomorrow.
With his empty cup in one hand and the other holding his phone to his ear, Evan strolled out of the living room towards the kitchen.
Hen had called. She was graciously going on a breakfast run this morning to fuel everyone up and she was ringing round to take orders.
"Yeah, I'll-" Evan cut himself short and lifted his head from looking towards the kitchen to stare at the stairs. He barely placed his cup down on the side when his eyes locked on (Y/n).
He had left her in bed when he came down ten minutes ago. He had dragged himself away from her, planting numerous kisses to her skin before he left and she wasn't at work today. She was on maternity leave and had no reason to be up this early.
That wasn't what worried Evan. It was the way she stumbled down the stairs and swung herself round into the bathroom at the side of the stairs that made him uneasy. He watched her burst into the bathroom, unable to stop and turn the light on before the horrid sound of her throwing up drifted through the apartment and echoed back to Evan.
"I'll call you back in five, I gotta go." He didn't wait for a response before he ended the call, tossed his phone on the side and jogged towards the bathroom. "Babe? Baby, you okay?"
Evan flicked the light on and pushed the door open, leaning his weight onto the door frame as a sigh pushed past his lips. His arms folded over his chest and he watched with a grimace as his wife threw up again.
She had her legs curled beneath her in an awkward sitting position, her feet slumped near the shower mat behind her. And her arms were draped around the back of the toilet with her head slumped forward onto her forearm to stop her head hanging in the toilet. Her upper body was slumped over and a subtle tremble had taken over her frame that was quaking back and forth as she tried to take big, panting breaths.
If Evan didn't know any better he would have thought she had fainted, but her weak groan told him she was still awake.
"Okay baby, come here." He pushed off the door frame and moved to crouch down beside her, arching his knees outwards so his legs were curved around her frame with her in between his thighs. "Talk to me,"
He was careful when he pulled (Y/n) up so he could look at her and he tried to hold her chin between his fingers. But their eyes barely met before (Y/n) pulled her chin out of his grip and bent down again to hurl into the toilet. The back of her throat burned and she coughed, trying her best not to choke as she threw up last night's tea and the little fluids she had drank during the night.
(Y/n) felt pitiful when she cried and gasped for breath, wiping her eyes on her arm but it didn't make her feel any better and she could feel more tears replacing them anyway.
She prayed Evan would have been out the door when she almost fell down the stairs so she didn't throw up on the floor. (Y/n) didn't like Evan seeing her like this, especially not when she was now going to make him late for work. It wasn't fair.
She could feel Evan's lips pressing against her bare shoulder and his hands slowly rubbed up and down her arms. His hum and shushes vibrated against her skin and made her shiver and when Evan pulled her back and let her flop against his chest, she tried to smile and look up at him. They both knew her smile did nothing to calm him down, he raised his brow as if asking if that was all she could manage.
"I-it's all out,"
"That's not exactly comforting, babe." Evan sighed before he leaned his arm over to flush the toilet. He cared a lot that she had thrown up last night's tea because it meant she didn't have anything left in her system. She was eight months pregnant, the last thing she needed was to be getting ill like this. Morning sickness had hit her hard in this pregnancy and she had only just shaken that off two months ago.
If she had some sort of stomach bug or sickness and was throwing up again, they would be back down the road of her getting dehydrated and lacking nutrients and the energy she needed.
"I… I feel a bit better now." (Y/n) dragged her fingers through her hair, pushing the strands away from her face that she turned to tuck into the crook of Evan's neck. She tried to smile into his skin when she felt his hands continue to smooth up and down her arms. "Don't make yourself late, sweetheart, I-"
A little gasp left her lips when Evan tilted her head back and pressed the back of his hand against her forehead. She shivered at the way he clicked his tongue and shook his head at her.
"Don't sweetheart me, you're burning up. You're going back to bed." She was getting a temperature and buttering him up wouldn't make him ignore that.
"I will."
(Y/n) tilted her head back on Evan's shoulder and reached a heavy hand up to cup his cheek. When he only stared down at her with that dark, infectious, if possessive look, (Y/n) could have melted on the spot if she didn't feel so icky and uneasy. She loved that little flicker in his eyes and the way he would curve his lips up at one side in a very dark way as opposed to the usual goofy way he smiled at everyone else.
"I don't doubt that, because I'm gonna stay and make sure you do."
"Evan no, you need to go to work," Something whined at the back of her throat and she dropped her head into the crook of his neck, bringing her hand up to brush his jaw while he kissed the top of her head. Her lips pressed against his neck and she kissed the junction beneath his jaw that acted as a button to make him shudder and curse at her.
She wasn't letting him take another day off to stay home with her. He needed to go to work, he would be taking leave in two weeks anyway in time for when the baby was born. It wasn't fair on him to take time off and be home with her when she was sick, he didn't need to be running round after her.
"Buttering me up won't make a difference, I'm not leaving you like this. Come on, sofa or bed?"
(Y/n) found the strength to loop her arms around Evan's neck and he took the hint, smiling into her temple as she wasn't going to argue this with him and he could feel her resolve melting away. His hands found her hips and he slowly stood up, pulling her with him onto unsteady feet.
When he heard (Y/n) whisper 'bed' quietly under her breath, he turned her around in his arms and pressed his hands against her lower stomach. His lips pressed to the back of her head and his elbows squeezed into her sides to pin her in his embrace. Evan could feel that she was still shaking in his arms and he didn't want to let go and have her stumble or fall.
Deep down they both knew she was in no fit state to stay home alone and mull about the house to try and settle her stomach. And Evan didn't trust her to tell him if she got worse. He needed to stay and look after her and check that she was going to eat and drink without throwing up again. She needed fluids in her system.
There was no way Evan was about to leave when she was in this state, he would ring Bobby soon and tell him he wasn't going in today.
A small smile flooded Evan's face as they started to ascend up the stairs as if they were conjoined. But the smile faded when they got halfway up and (Y/n) suddenly stopped. Evan's knees bumped into the back of her thighs and he jolted to a stop as (Y/n) clamped her hands down on his wrists as her knees buckled.
"Going dizzy,"
(Y/n) snapped her eyes closed and tilted her chin down into her chest to try and relieve the air bubbling up in her head. She felt like all the blood was draining from her head and static burst in her ears.
"Okay, okay down we go baby."
Slowly, Evan lowered them both down until he was kneeling on the step below and eased (Y/n) down with him until she was awkwardly bent in front of him with her back leant up against his chest. His chin perched on her shoulder so he could kiss her cheek as he moved his arms around.
An arm stayed around her lower waist and he shifted his right arm beneath her legs, coiling his wife into his chest before he slowly stood up. He didn't give (Y/n) time to panic or tell him she was too heavy or it was too dangerous to pick her up on the middle of the stairs. He held her up in his arms and walked up the rest of the stairs towards the bedroom.
He bent his knees in front of the bed and carefully eased (Y/n) down, biting his lip when (Y/n) wavered and flopped forward. Her head pressed into his lower abdomen and her hands clutched at his thighs as she groaned into his stomach. Evan curled his hand over the back of her neck and leaned down to kiss her head.
"I'm definitely not going in today. Think you can lay down for me while I go call Bobby?"
Evan brushed his thumb across her jaw and kissed her forehead when she dropped down properly onto the bed and curled up on her side. Her eyes were already closed and she buried her face in the pillow, looking like she was half dazed, on the verge of sleep.
***
(Y/n) tiredly nuzzled her face into Evan's chest, burying her face into his hoodie as she wedged herself further into his side. Her arm moved to drape over his middle while she felt Evan's arm tighten around her side. His large hand splayed out on her stomach and he grinned when he slipped his cold hand beneath her shirt and felt her squirm and gasp into his chest.
"What time is it?" She grumbled quietly, brushing her nose into the ruffle of his jumper.
"Half one. Are you gonna try and eat something?" Evan scratched the back of his head, pushing back on his arm that was pinned between his head and the headrest. He ruffled the hood on his hoodie and dragged it down from covering his head.
"Hm," She wasn't hungry but she knew Evan would start to start to fuss like a mother hen and panic if she didn't eat anything soon. She hadn't eaten yet, she was letting her stomach settle after being sick this morning. Most of the day had been spent in bed with Evan watching tv and (Y/n) sleeping.
"Good," He kissed the top of her head before he slowly eased from beneath her and sat up, stretching his arms above his head.
He had managed to get (Y/n) to drink two glasses of juice so far and that was an achievement.
When Evan headed downstairs, (Y/n) slowly sat up and clicked her spine into place. She felt better than this morning when she stood up and pulled evan's shirt back down so it covered her thighs since she wasn't wearing bottoms.
Her lips curved into a tired smile and she looked across to the kitchen as she headed down stairs. Evan was wearing matching grey joggers and a hoodie but it was an old one, it looked like it barely fit him now and every time he moved an arm, he flexed a bicep. His hair was ruffled with curls standing up on end in each direction and the way he parted his lips just a little when he was concentrating looked sweet.
"What are you doing?"
She didn't realise she had been staring until she looked up and Evan was staring at her. He had raised brows and a smirk as he pushed a glass of juice across the counter towards her.
"I thought we were eating?" Her eyes fell to the counter and she grabbed the stool, trying to be graceful but she knew she didn't look it when she slowly eased herself up onto the stool.
"Yes, but you should be resting."
"I am, I'm sat down,"
When Evan passed her to go to the fridge, (Y/n) reached her arms out and curved them around Evan's arm so she could reel him into her chest. He turned round, a look of surprise on his face but he wasn't complaining. He cupped her face and tilted her head up, brushing his thumbs near her lips before he leaned down to kiss her. She felt his teeth nip at her lower lip and she smiled, grazing her fingers against his neck to make him growl.
"You're still burning up," He commented quietly as he pressed a kiss to her temple. "Come on, baby." Evan helped her down from the stool and reached over for the plates he had gotten ready.
(Y/n) cosied herself up into Evan's side when they sat down on the sofa for a change. Her arm curled around his bicep and she leaned her cheek against his upper arm, staring down at the sandwich on her plate. She didn't feel so hungry now she was looking at food. Her stomach was churning at the sight of food and she could feel her throat tightening, but she needed to try.
She was only going to make herself feel worse if she didn't eat anything and she needed to try and look after her and the baby.
"You okay?" Evan had demolished most of his sandwich while (Y/n) seemed to have taken one bite of hers which she was staring at woefully.
"I'm not hungry,"
"Can you eat half of it, please? For me?" Concern dripped from Evan's voice as he looked down at (Y/n) and kissed the top of her head. If she had just a few more bites he would feel better. At this rate, Evan knew he was going to be taking tomorrow off as well if (Y/n) was still like this. He wasn't going back to work if she couldn't eat and wasn't drinking enough.
A small groan burned at the back of (Y/n)'s throat and she put the plate down on the coffee table before she tucked herself back into Evan's side. He could feel her trying to take steady breaths that fanned through his sleeve. She had eaten about four bites of her sandwich which was something, but it still wasn't good.
"Stay there a minute," Evan jogged off to the kitchen and when he returned, he handed her a milkshake. "Try one of my protein shakes. I'd feel a lot better if you could keep something like this down."
Evan and Eddie had a lot of protein shakes at the station in case they didn't have much time for food or if they felt run down. They were great for helping when they were training in the gym and on days off. Evan would stop worrying so much if (Y/n) managed to drink one and keep it down because it was full of vitamins and proteins and it was as good as a blended smoothie. It would mean she had something in her and it would stop her from feeling so run down and sick.
"Thank you," He spoke quietly against the top of her head when (Y/n) finished the drink.
He propped his feet up on the coffee table and slouched down and a grin spread across Evan's lips when he felt (Y/n) moving his hand. She curved his arm so it was draped across her chest with his palm pressed against her lower stomach. Her head tucked up against his arm and she could feel adrenaline coursing through her stomach when Evan slowly began to glide his hand up and down her stomach.
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strawberrystepmom · 4 months
Text
gojo x f!reader are in a semi established relationship aka idiots in love. reader is a teacher/sorcerer. reader is referred to as future wife in jest. angsty to start but gets sweet at the end. italics indicate reader’s internal thought. this is v self ship coded bc a girl has been Experiencing. wc 1.2k
divider thanks to @/cafekitsune
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Why did I agree to stay and do this job in the first place?
The thought ricochets between the walls of your skull like a speeding marble, rolling so quickly it’s nothing but a technicolor blur that will settle wherever it wants when all is said and done. You don’t have the luxury of a distraction tonight and after a terrible day, your confidence and what feels like your sanity is in splinters. It has felt like this for months if you dare to be honest with yourself and now the unavoidable wall of your own mind is in front of you.
The too hot shower you just finished that left you breathless and warm cheeked didn’t rinse away anything except for the external grime. Your brain itself still feels thick and heavy, temples pounding while you shrug the robe wrapped around you to the tile floor below. It is far from your favorite thing to shower on campus but you had the intention of washing all the misery off and leaving it here rather than dragging it back to the currently empty apartment you share with Satoru. He’s off on another mission hours and hours away from you and your bed feels like a labyrinth when he isn’t sharing it.
A little voice in your head convinces you he’s taking these missions solely to get away from you in this state and you can hardly blame him. As hard as you work to keep a smile on your face, you fail more often than you succeed. The weight of said failures and struggles makes your head even heavier, resting atop your neck like a crown of thorns.
It’s late and you haven’t even bothered to think about how you’re going to get home from campus, still decompressing from your first solo mission in a while after being looked at by Shoko for minor bruising. The mission was completed successfully but it merely added to the weight of the loneliness and hurt you’ve been feeling. Being responsible for ending suffering you didn’t create is a heavy burden.
Your phone pings on the wooden bench in front of the lockers near the shower and you grab it, sniffling. Glancing at the screen, you gnaw your lower lip and a tear streams down your cheek. You’ve cried so much lately it never comes as a surprise when you start again.
Satoru: call me?
Normally his message and the use of the winking cat sticker in addition to the words would make you smile but you can’t find it in you to do that tonight. Of course, he’s already heard about your failures. You’re certain your employer, friends, and community keep him on speed dial to come and gather your pieces when you can’t keep them together. You have doubts about how well meaning their intentions are; everyone loves a downfall after all and yours feels closer every day.
You: still at the school and can’t talk. love you, be careful.
Someday I’ll push him away and it will stick.
One day, soon you imagine, Satoru will decide everyone was right about you all along. You’re avoidant and selfish, a mess on a good day. Your bones are good but the flesh that covers them is rotten as a discarded plum, falling from the branches of the only home it has ever known, at the end of spring. You are no good. Not like him, even in his shades of light gray morality. Not like your fellow sorcerers. Not like your students.
Your phone pings again.
Satoru: why are you making me suffer???
Satoru: please please please please please~
You place the device face down and focus on changing into the extra set of clothes you always keep in your office. Sorcery is messy work and your shaking fingers fasten each of the buttons on the simple white top.
Why do I keep doing this?
Vibrations make your phone move across the wooden bench and you jump, picking it up with a sigh.
“What?”
A chuckle from the other end, one that instantly makes the tension in your shoulders relax, isn’t as unwelcome as you assumed it would be when you refused to call him. You picture his smile when he laughs, the dimples you love to press your thumbs into. Even your tortured mind conjures memories of the delicate crinkle of his nose when he grins and the cleft in his chin.
“Someone has her sassy pants on today.”
Sighing, you let the world roll off of your shoulders. Finally.
“Technically I don’t have any pants on right now.”
“Without me?” He sighs and then remembers you said you were still on campus. You hear him shift wherever he’s at and you sit down on the bench, preparing to put your pants on, holding the phone to your ear with your shoulder. “Why are you pantsless on campus? Is there something you need to tell me?”
A snort escaping in response, you smile for the first time in what feels like days. Truthfully it has only been a few hours, you’re a pro at keeping up appearances at the very least, but each has felt more and more forced.
“Nope, just had to wash off some gore and didn’t want to bring it home with me. They’ll probably ask us to break the lease if we start washing curse chunks down the drain.”
He chuckles again and you want to be frustrated with how carefree he seems but find it difficult to hold his good nature against him.
“Aren’t you considerate?”
Sliding your pants on, you stand in a fluid motion and hop to settle them in place on your hips, fastening the button.
“Something like that,” you mutter. Sitting back down on the bench, you cut to the chase. “When are you coming home?”
“Why? Miss me?”
“Terribly.”
You respond flatly and suddenly your phone chimes, a request to video chat coming through from Gojo. Answering it, you don’t bother to hide the wistful smile on your face and he grins at you from your bed at home.
“Well come home then, I’ve been waiting for you.”
“You could have led with the fact you’re there.”
He twists his mouth to the side and shrugs. Rolling your eyes, you smile back at him. It’s impossible to stay mad at someone you love so much it threatens to tear you into pieces when he’s gone for too long.
“I wanted to surprise you and it looks like I still managed to do it.”
“Yeah, you still manage to do that a lot.”
“Oh stop it, you might make me think that my future wife actually likes me.”
Giggling, your face warms at the insinuation he’s making. He can tell you’re feeling better now that his eyes are on you and the relief he feels is immeasurable.
“Hurry, I’m getting bored and you know what happens when I get like that.”
You know better than anyone that a bored boyfriend spells nonsense so you pack up the last of your things, ready to leave your troubles behind on campus just as you intended to start with. Self doubt, suspicion, distrust - it’s all gone as soon as he gives you his grace to carry on.
“Don’t get antsy, I’ll be there soon.”
Another irresistible chuckle comes through your speakers and you feel lighter than air by the time you disconnect from the call and prepare to head home.
He’s the moon that guides you through the darkest nights and tonight is clearly no exception, his cool and disarming light shining through all of your cracks to remind you things are brighter than you think.
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