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trickstersaint · 16 days

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an aromantic person is someone who (fill in the blank here) // april 10 2024

#dunno how the image quality is gonna turn out on this one i had to smallen the doc to fit it all in one screenshot #bear with me. haha #poetry #poems about aromanticism #aro poetry #aro poet #aromantic poet #aromantic poetry #aromanticism #aromantic #DELIGHTFUL tags i always forget i can use haha #poem #poems #poets on tumblr #napowrimo #poems and poetry #escapril #poetsandwriters #aromantic thoughts on love

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merely-a-caricature · 16 days

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Kissing on the lips. No. Why? I don’t get it. Truly? What is so enticing about putting your lips together? Don’t even get me started on tongues…

#aromantic #aro #arospec #aromanticism #aspec #aroace #aromantic spectrum #aromantic thoughts #that’s not a tag?!#i love kissing people on the forehead or whatever #but I will NEVER kiss someone on the lips

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wheres-your-paddle · 5 months

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i'm just saying if my friends offered to spend the rest of our lives travelling together and decorating our shared apartment how we like it and raising pets (or maybe even an adopted child!) together then i most certainly wouldn't decline

#i love my friends #platonic relationships #friend goals #lovecore #heart shaped #spilled thoughts #ace #aro #aroace spectrum #qpr #aroace #asexual #aromantic #platonic #the paddle speaks

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glitterghost · 8 months

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Correct me if I'm wrong, but I feel like there is a particular kind of sadness (or loneliness, if you will) that ace/aro folk feel.

#asexual #asexuality #aspec #aromantic #aro #arospec #lgbtqia #am I wrong or no?#its like a sorrow on a frequency only other ace folk can detect #or say ah ha yes i feel this #this makes sense #i can incoherently ramble a feeling or a thought and others who identifying *get* it like it's a language we both speak #fluent in a common wave of ace-solation if you will #anyway just wanting to throw this out there again #i know i had a vague post similar to this that blew up but its always so hard to articulate the feeling #and maybe this will reach others that relate and agree to this that will make them feel less alone #wow these tags are messy and full of typos #lots of love to my loney ace and aro specs buddies #💜💚💜💚💜

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alastors-antlers · 3 months

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Being someone who sees a lot of talk about shipping Alastor (sexually, romantically) in fanworks, I just want to take some time to talk about both sides of the issue. It's long, I know - please, please bear with me until the end, and I hope you'll understand what I mean in a bit.

I hope this helps someone, but as an aroace person who understands the frustration and hurt, this is often how it feels to me:

Alastor, being one of the limited cases of aspec rep that I've seen and one of even fewer which I actually enjoyed, means a lot to me.

That being said, his canon rep establishes that he's aroace but not much about how this factors into his life or relationships at all -- and when there's a gap in canon, I turn to fanfiction, which tends to spotlight characters' queerness even when the source material doesn't or can't. Don't we all want to see ourselves in the media we engage with?

When I pull up AO3, there are already a good number of fics about him. Great! Some of them are definitely incredible; but as I read on, it starts to seem like a lot of fics I see acknowledge that he's asexual or aromantic in some way but don't really factor that into the story. It reads like you could have written the story without keeping his queer identity in mind, and it would've come out the same.

Even when representation that does resonate with me exists, it starts to be exhausting to pick through the slash tags to see which ones are written in an aspec-coded way, so I wonder if it would be easier to not read anything with slash at all. On the other hand, when you filter ships out completely, only a tiny fraction of the fanworks are left.

People often respond that aspec people can have relationships, and I think we tend to know that. They can have sex, some can experience sexual attraction in select situations, they can romance others beyond romantic attraction -- any combination of things. But some aroace people don't want either, and sometimes we're struggling to see ourselves in how Alastor is typically portrayed.

Out of all of the fics, sex-repulsed, totally aromantic Alastor isn't seen much. And when Alastor's limited canon seems to be pretty supportive of a reading where he is those things...

Sometimes, you start to feel lost. If fics were evenly distributed along the aroace spectrum of experiences, wouldn't you expect more fics of him being the "totally uninterested" brand of aroace? But there aren't. People seem to have a preference toward seeing him in relationships. Even if they mean well, it can make you think: what does that say about how we view asexuality/aromanticism as a whole?

Is there something less interesting about Alastor, when romance is taken out of the picture? Do others find him less appealing as a character if they can't see him dating, or in love, or having sex or wanting it? Why do we need romance, when romance is already everywhere else, when it doesn't even feel like he was originally really interested? It brings to mind a struggle to be societally accepted, even today.

Even when it's not technically wrong to write Alastor as you see him, being told that we should all be able to ship him however we want can feel like this:

It brings to mind people who try to swing in with misinformed good intentions, telling us "oh, you're aromantic? but you can still have romantic relationships, right? so you can still be normal." when all we want is to be okay outside of the normal.

Or trying to find a partner who can be with us, out of everyone who tells us "I know you don't enjoy sex, and that's okay, but I can't have a romantic relationship with you without it." and being so tired of hoping for someone who gets it.

Or talking with peers, and hearing them all commiserate and fawn over their experiences with love, then telling them about someone you like non-romantically and getting "aww, it sounds like somebody's got a crush!" but not being believed when you tell them it's not like that at all.

Alastor is not a big deal, not really, not in the grand scheme of things. But in an allonormative world, it can feel like a sudden splash of cold water when we were expecting a warm fire to sit around. Even within this ecosystem, we squint to see ourselves reflected.

Society isn't built for us. It can be exhausting to be reminded of that.

~~~

I hope to support people writing Alastor as any variation of aspec, or not even aspec at all. At the end of the day, I think that fanon is really whatever you want it to be, and everyone has their own reasons for writing what they find enjoyable. They should be allowed to do so, and I want to believe that people do what they do with good intentions.

They want to imagine scenarios with the templates of characters they love, and that's okay; even beyond sexuality/queer identities/etc., fan interpretations of characters can be incredibly, wildly different from who they really are in the story anyway, and that's what I try to remind myself. But still, I also can't help feeling disappointed about the aroace representation we could have seen.

(Is Alastor canonically sex-repulsed? Uhh, maybe. If I had to guess, that'd be my top guess, but this might be a hot take: I wouldn't really say there's enough to go off of considering that this view is supported by Angel propositioning him both times, and it's not like Alastor is a particularly big fan of Angel at those points anyway lol)

To my fellow aroaces struggling with Alastor's fandom rep: if you need a break from it all; if you need to block the tags that you hate; if you need to talk to someone about how you're feeling; that's okay. It makes sense that you'd want more representation in a way that helps you feel seen and validated and less alone. I can't speak for everyone, but I think I get it.

I don't have any solutions for how you're feeling, because sometimes I'm feeling the same way. I understand that you want others to get your position and you have the right to express your feelings, but even if you're correct, often being angry or frustrated won't help change others' minds, so let's try to save our energy and take care of ourselves.

Something that helps me to think about is that even now, asexuality is gaining more visibility. We're gaining support. Real change is happening in the world that's helping incredible amounts of aspec people feel freer to be themselves. And maybe one day, we won't be reaching to protect our scraps of representation.

Let's fight until that day together <3

#seriously I appreciate everyone who's out here posting about alastor I love being in the radio demon fanclub lol #just some thoughts that's all and maybe it'll resonate with others #please let's be patient with each other though it's rough out there already #alastor #hazbin #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin hotel #asexual #aromantic #asexual alastor #aromantic alastor #aroace alastor #alastor hazbin #ace #aro

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lovequeerindigo · 11 months

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i’m not a loveless aro but i agree with their beliefs

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theminecraftbee · 4 months

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Afterwards, they do a race. They don’t talk about it, but it’s there, between them still. Something settled between them. Cleo doesn’t know how to say it; they never know how to say things like this. Still, they need to, so they wait until Ren’s race is over and then hike through the jungle to go sit on top of Etho’s base and wait for him to show up as well.

He doesn’t. He’d gone to their base. Instead of just showing up for each other, they have to somewhat awkwardly coordinate over text which base to meet at. It forces everything to feel more real.

When they finally meet up, it’s in the shopping district, leaning against the button. A dangerous game in theory, but Cleo’s not fully convinced it can explode at this point, so.

Cleo breathes. They’re both quiet for a moment.

"Okay, so like, are we doing this?" Cleo says.

"I don’t really know, uh, what this is," Etho says, "but I… care about you. I think. So I think we’re doing that."

Cleo nods once. "You know I don’t fall in love, right? I’m not going to fall in love with you, I don’t do that. Might say something about loving you, but it’s not the same thing. Different sense of the word. It’s different, loving people and falling in love, got it? And I won’t do that second thing. I’m never going to do that second thing. I don’t--"

"Okay. I know," Etho says.

"Do you?" Cleo asks.

"I mean, not entirely, but I’m frankly surprised we’re having this conversation in the first place. I never expected you to be in love with me."

"But I’m not," Cleo says. "I’m attracted to you, and I love you as like, a companion and friend or whatever, but I’m not in love with you. I’m. Ugh. I wish I knew the right words. I just--I also don’t let go of things so if we’re doing this you’re going to have to get used to that real fast. Me not being in love with you but me not letting you go, both of those things."

"You're attracted to me? Aw, Cleo," Etho says.

"Don't be an ass," Cleo says.

"Sorry, sorry. It's just, geez, this is--a heavy conversation, huh?"

Cleo sighs. "We'll work on the deflection."

Etho rubs the back of his head and looks away. "Uh, in that case. If I'm maybe a little in love with you--"

"I can't--I can't reciprocate that, Etho," Cleo says, and their voice cracks as they do.

"I know," Etho says. "I just want to make sure it's okay, then."

"You can't help that, can you? Just like I can't help that I still sort of want to kill anyone who hurts you."

Etho seems to think about it for a while. Cleo resists the urge to fidget. She's a zombie. She shouldn't have the urge to fidget; she should be too dead for that. Besides, it's hardly like it's a secret she doesn't fall in love, exactly. It's just... it's only relevant sometimes. Feeling like, as she watches Etho and Bdubs dance around each other, she's on the outside looking in. She'd kill to hold their hands, to protect them, hell, even to kiss them--but that's different. She just can't summon the same emotion of... she doesn't know.

Martyn had almost gotten it, for all he didn't get anything else, in the end. Scott was never going to fall in love with her in the first place, for obvious reasons. Whatever attraction she and Pearl have going on, it's definitely not love.

But this...

"Okay," Etho says.

"That's it?" Cleo says.

"I mean, does it need to be anything else?" Etho says. "It's not like we can just... not do this. I think it's too late for that. Whatever 'this' is. I'm in love, and you aren't, but we'd both be pretty upset to lose this, right? So I'll... figure it out."

Cleo swallows. They feel small. "Will you? Do you understand?"

Etho shrugs. "I understand that it's you, and it's you that this happened with, not anyone else."

"Okay," Cleo says. "Okay."

"Is it okay if I kiss you? Just to try it, I mean. Not like, as a--this is a bad time, actually, I don't want to try to make any kissing we do romantic, I mean, you just told me this won't be romantic, I--"

"Yeah, sure, you can kiss me," Cleo says, and he leans in to kiss them. It's nice. A little soft for what they'd want, really, but nice. He leans back. He looks them in the eyes.

"I get it a little more now."

Cleo is baffled. "How? Kissing is just like, a thing we did? How does that have anything to do with any of the rest of this."

Etho laughs. "I definitely get it a little more now. What do you want to tell the others? I know they're definitely gossiping."

"Ugh. Can we just, like, not?" Cleo says. "I don't want to have to explain it."

"I'll just be confusing then, got it," Etho says, and Cleo can't help but laugh themselves.

"This is why you're my favorite," Cleo says, and they think maybe this will work out okay, after all.

#secret life smp #trafficshipping #hermitshipping #a bee fic #cletho #zombiecleo #ethoslab #yeah this one is ALSO pretty overtly shipping even though it’s also overtly aromantic #idk man. definitions are blurry. lines are blurry. I’d call this shipping even if it’s not about being in love.#anyway. bi aro cleo is a headcanon I’m increasingly attached to so I thought I’d write this for yall.#don’t know how to explain it more than. I think it suits them.#I know this is out of my wheelhouse but I felt like I wanted it out there yeah?#anyway I’LL GO BACK TO THE FANON SWAP PROMPTS SOON JUST NEEDED THIS WRITTEN FIRST

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my-lonely-thoughts · 1 month

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Aroace culture is finding out as an adult that sex and romance is not just an over exaggerated concept but a very real thing people like/do 😵‍💫

#no hate to allos!#but im ngl i always thought you just talked and sang about it #not actually DO it lol #love ya'll tho 🫶🏻#aroace #aromantic #aromantic culture #asexual #asexuality #asexual culture #lgbtq #lgtbqia+#lgbtqia #queer #my lonely thoughts

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maerhiya · 2 months

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in regards to the constant dismissal of his aroace identity, i hate it when alastor 'fans' say and use the excuse: "he's fictional, he won't get offended."

like, you're right, but it can and will offend us.

when you see yourself being represented on screen, of course you'd feel enthusiastic about it — representation allows individuals to see themselves reflected in the media they consume, validating their identities and experiences. but when so many people take that representation and decide to disregard and discard it, it is so fucking frustrating. we finally have another character to be part of the tiny amount of representation we have, but then people don't even care about how much it means to us? like yeah, alastor won't get offended because he's not real, but it frustrates and annoys us. do you realize that it's also technically invalidating the aroace community? that you're invalidating our feelings? imagine feeling like you're finally being seen because your orientation is finally being represented in media, and people just decide to blatantly ignore, discard, and invalidate it.

media has such a powerful influence on real life, representation being a prevalent factor of it. there are numerous posts that dictate how people went to watch a movie/show or read a book just because a character depicts their identity in it — obviously, being represented is an incredibly uplifting and validating experience.

which is why seeing an aroace character in a popular show is so meaningful to us because we live in a world where romance and sex are literally everywhere and prioritized above all else. (and it's pretty obvious that alastor's on the repulsed end of the spectrum, but even if he wasn't, at least make an effort to acknowledge his sexuality instead of continuing to portray him as allo; aroace folks can be in relationships but it's not going to be the same thing with allos' experiences.)

any and every representation matters, but why does that seem to stop at people under the aroace spectrum? like y'all can't even let us appreciate the scraps of representation we have. we barely have any, so are we really that dramatic for being upset at how people easily disregard and dismiss our identities that are being depicted on screen just like that? is it truly wrong of us to want to defend and maintain the little representation we have?

#like imagine if i asked you ab your fav character and then i said i hated them and proceeded to insult them #wouldn't that irritate you even just a bit and maybe even come to their defense?#like why would you be offended when they're not even real lmaoo #they're fictional and won't get offended but if you love that character then YOU might feel offended and maybe even defend them #ok now take that situation and put it into this context #except it's much more meaningful bc it's about representation #just a random thought #i'm not against shipping him or finding him attractive (bc same LMAO) or the fanart btw #i just hate it when people use bs excuses to justify their obvious dismissal & indifference towards aro/ace rep #like at least acknowledge his identity :((#sorry for the long ass rant and if some parts don't make sense i'm not in the best mood rn lol #and i've been wanting to get this off my chest for a while #didn't know double standards were a thing when it came to representation....#but here we are #alastor #aroace alastor #aroace #asexual #aromantic #asexuality #aromanticism #arospec #aspec #alastor hazbin hotel #aromantic alastor #asexual alastor #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel alastor #aroacespec #queer

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since-times-long-forgotten · 3 months

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Alastor says happy Wednesday

#hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin hotel #alastor #aromantic #asexual #aromantic asexual #aroace #Hope my fellow a-specs have a good day <3 #sun’s art #my art :)#I drew this with my finger on flipaclip this morning #first time drawing Alastor #turned out better than I thought!#love loses #happy love loses wednesday

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trickstersaint · 5 months

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canines // december 10 2023

#not sure about the title. we'll see if i keep it #again! if you come back here to find that something has changed since you reblogged a poem!#the draft has been updated. reblog it again haha #poems about love #aromantic thoughts on love #aromantic poet #aromantic poetry #poems about asexuality #poetry #poem #poems #poets on tumblr #poems and poetry #poetsandwriters

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aroandawkward · 8 months

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I can't stop thinking about Isaac Henderson in Heartstopper, and the inherent isolation of being an aroace person in a romance story. Because, at the end of the day, that's what Heartstopper is - it's about the romance between Nick and Charlie. Even when the narrative has expanded outwards to focus on other characters, their plotlines are primarily about romance: Elle and Tao, Darcy and Tara… It's true that Isaac has a loving friend group and the show doesn't devalue platonic love in the way that many romance stories do. But nevertheless, as an aroace person, Isaac is at odds with the genre of the story in which he lives. The tropes that shows like this are built around don't work for him.

Something that really hammers this home is how the scene when Isaac and James kiss mirrors Charlie and Nick's first kiss. In both scenes, two boys are sitting on the floor away from the main action of a party, one admits to having a crush, the other nervously wants to know whether it's them, and then they kiss. In his version of that scene with James, Isaac is experiencing a moment that - for another character - could be a beautiful moment in a romantic storyline.

For viewers who weren't aware of Alice Oseman's promise of an aroace storyline for Isaac, his interactions with James in the early episodes of Season 2 could easily have been interpreted as the beginning of a romantic love story. The rest of the main Heartstopper group have certainly been viewing his friendship with James through that lens, as shown by the way they tease him about it. But those plot beats of a romantic story don't work for Isaac. Trying to fit into the romance genre pushes Isaac in a direction that feels wrong for him. He is the one person in his primary friend group who can't make himself at home in a romance story.

I don't mean this as a criticism of the show. There is a lot of value to love stories like Heartstopper and there is a lot of value to having aspec representation in a show like Heartstopper. But I think this is the reason why Isaac's plotline felt particularly heartwrenching for me. Sometimes being aroace does feel like being out of step with the genre of story everyone else around you is living. Sometimes it feels like trying to find a place for yourself in a narrative that wasn't built for you. Sometimes it feels like trying to prove to yourself (and the world) that you can still have moments that feel like swirling leaves.

#heartstopper #heartstopper s2 #heartstopper season 2 #heartstopper spoilers #isaac henderson #Comparing this to my other beloved aroace rep...#Georgia in Loveless thinks that she's in a romance story #but it turns out she's in a different kind of love story #Koisenu Futari also feels like a love story without being a romance story #but with Isaac in Heartstopper it's different #because Isaac is actually in a romance story - it just isn't his romance story #Sometimes I struggle with the thought that not having a romance means I can't be a protagonist #I overidentify with the 'best friend' side characters in romcoms every time #awkward aroposting #Aromantic #Aroace

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redysetdare · 9 months

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Love often is treated like a transaction. Someone loves you and you are expected to love them back. Truth be told you are not required to love them back. This includes friends and family. Love is not something you owe in any relationship. Period.

Does it suck to know someone doesn't feel the same way as you? Yes, of course it does. But it's not a personal attack if they dont. They don't owe it to you matter who you are or what you've done.

Love is not and should not be mandatory. Love does not = caring for people. You can care about people without love.

#text #aromantic #asexual #ace #aroace #loveless aro #aro #loveless #aplatonic #srry im projecting a bit #i grew up in a toxic environment that said i had to love ppl back or else i was label a villain #so i have some thoughts abt love being used as a transaction that is expected to be returned #especially when it comes to family

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vanyafresita · 3 months

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