#anyway the light shines in the darkness and the darkness has not overcome it and i am never going to stop shouting about it
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THE TEXAS LIBRARY ASSOCIATION TELLS CHUCK TINGLE TO STAY HOME BUT WE PROVE LOVE ANYWAY
just when you buckaroos thought 2024 would be a break from book drama, here comes chuck tingle in the mix. recently i was asked to be a featured speaker at the TEXAS LIBRARY ASSOCIATION annual conference. a few days ago they rescinded my invitation. here is what happened.
(EDITED TO ADD THIS LINK. if you have a hard time reading this on way of tumblr you can also read for free on chucks patreon)
i would like to start off by saying it is not my intent to start a fight, and all those reading this should know that the actions of a few misguided folks do not speak for the whole TEXAS LIBRARY ASSOCIATION. i am sure there are many involved who will be very upset to learn what others at TLA have done in their name. there are many individuals here, so please do not paint them all as villains in your mind. besides, chuck loves the dang library everyone knows that.
the point of writing this is not to vilify. i am writing this is because MOMENTS OF DARKNESS are the best places to SHINE A LIGHT AND PROVE LOVE IS REAL. this is a perfect time for learning and growing and for us talk on some very important things that queer buckaroos and neurodivergent buckaroos face every day. this is an unfortunate moment that WE can turn around and use to prove love is real.
i am also writing this to understand some of my own personal feelings on the matter. for something that seems very simple on the surface, the trot is complex, and i am still working out my emotions on the whole dang thing. i am learning in this way.
PART ONE: BAG OF LOVE
a few months ago chuck was asked to be a featured speaker at the 2024 TEXAS LIBRARY ASSOCIATION ANNUAL CONFERENCE. i have been asked to do things like the before and it is ALWAYS a fun time to meet bookseller and librarian buds. trotting around face to face and talking about my story of conquering chronic pain and overcoming my mental hurdles is VERY IMPORTANT to me. i say YES to these things whenever i can. (here i am with authors at CALIFORNIA INDEPENDENT BOOKSELLERS ALLIANCE conference. they are a WONDERFUL group and they proved love with their OWN invitation to chuck. this was such a moving event with so many amazing authors and stories. got very teared up during this photo)
ANYWAY BUCKAROOS i get the TEXAS LIBRARY ASSOCIATION invite and say 'YES BUD LETS TROT'. we are then confirmed.
months pass. a few weeks ago i get a call from my manager and agent and publisher saying ‘the TLA have rescinded their invitation.’
turns out some things had been going on behind the scenes
at some point the TLA asked chucks INCREDIBLE HEROIC BAD ASS PUBLISHER if chuck would be okay with not wearing the mask, to which tor/nightfire/macmillan said ‘what the heck are you talking about of course chuck is going to wear his mask. this is how chuck presents himself’ (NOT EXACT QUOTE)
as you all know, my pink bag way is a VERY IMPORTANT SPACE. as an autistic buckaroo it is a boundary that allows me to express myself freely and relieve my chronic pain from neurotypically masking all day. i have talked about this for years, and it is why i consider my private identity a SACRED THING. it is literally a health issue.
fortunately THE PINK BAG is never really a problem when making appearances. i have spent years going on television shows, doing interviews, speaking at other conferences and conventions, hosting book events on tour, and even MEETING WITH LAWYERS in my pink face covering. it is always respected and that is very validating to my way.
when arriving anywhere i always take precautions. i always warn buckaroos ahead of time that there is a masked man coming. i always have someone go in ahead of me JUST IN CASE. again, there has never been an issue. at a big conference where i am a special guest there is ESPECIALLY not an issue because my face and bio are printed IN THE DANG PROGRAM
SOME FUN TIMES AT BIG EVENTS BELOW:
CHUCK ON TV SHOW NAME OF 'AT MIDNIGHT' BACK BEFORE I WROTE LOVE IS REAL ON MY HEAD:
well, there has never been an issue.... UNTIL NOW.
PART TWO: RESCINDED
a few days ago TEXAS LIBRARY ASSOCIATION suddenly messaged my publishers and said that chuck tingle is no longer invited. my invitation was rescinded. the reason given was that people could possibly be uncomfortable with my mask
right out of the gate i would like to say this: it is absolutely the right of the texas library association to disinvite someone from their conference. it is their event, after all, and they can ban anyone they would like, for any reason.
of course, that doesnt mean other folks HEARING THIS NEWS wont have their own opinions the TLA choices. if the TLA disinvites someone, their reasoning for doing this can be discussed and analyzed. whether or not they follow their own guidelines can be questioned, and certainly their kindness and tact can be considered
there are a few BIG POINTS to make regarding this choice from the TLA
first and foremost, i just gotta say buckaroos, it is incredibly rude to invite someone to be a guest speaker at your event, have them confirm and mark off their calendar and turn down other offers, then rescind their invitation. this is maybe the simplest of the points, but it is an important one.
second, (DEEP BREATH HERE WE GO BUCKAROOS) i personally do not think of my autism as a disability very often, but i also KNOW that despite these feelings it ABSOLUTELY IS. autism is important to be listed as a recognized disability because of the help some autistic buckaroos need regarding government programs and things like that. ALSO just because my neurodivergence has helped me in some ways (hyperfocus and a unique artistic sensibility for example). i personally need to step back and remember my battle with stress and chronic pain from having to neurotypically mask all the time. for as much as i love being autistic it has made some things very difficult.
in other words, i am perfectly capable of speaking and interacting with folks without this pink bag on my head BUT WHEN I AM IN THE CHUCK TINGLE SPACE I REQUIRE IT. i can ONLY use this space while covering my face. is not a want. it is a need. holding this boundary is more important than i can ever say. i will not, and can not, let these spaces cross.
TLA not letting an autistic author wear the face cover theyve set up to express their neurodivergence in a safe, healthy way is--for lack of a better term--NOT A GOOD LOOK.
i cannot fathom them disinviting another author for using a disability aid. i cannot fathom them saying that a buckaroo who hears better with a hearing device cannot use it during their panel because it would make others 'uncomfortable'.
but here we are.
PART THREE: WHAT DOES A BUCKAROO GOTTA DO TO GET BANNED AROUND HERE?
this is the TLAs official stance on disability issues according to their website:
when poking around on the TLA website i noticed a few other things. i noticed a previous guest speaker wearing a niqab, and i was left wondering if the religious significance is what make that okay but chuck tingle banned. that made sense until i looked deeper and saw mascot buckaroos dressed up on the exhibition floor, and saw some kind of spiderbud in a costume contest. nobody around them seemed to be all that scared. their invitations REMAINED INTACT.
it should be mentioned here that AT ONE POINT during the discussions an email was sent from TLA saying chuck is allowed to come and wear his mask in the exhibition halls and smaller panels, just not at any of the big PAID PANELS i was once supposed to participate on. this was a confusing offer, but their explanation was that people who paid for something should have the option to not see chucks 'scary neurodivergence aid'. i tried to wrap my head around WHY they would make a distinction. maybe the exchange of money (rather than time) causes some kind of philosophical adjustment that i just cant grasp?
i wonder, would the author who wears a niqab ALSO be banned from the paid panels? i hope not
my answers trotted up short until i investigated deeper and found this quick moment from one of the TLA help videos. while some events DO require additional buckaroo cash, it actually appears that THE ENTIRE CONFERENCE IS TICKETED AND COSTS MONEY.
at this point i realized there is clearly no actual official policy about not covering your face (other than one from a few years ago saying that you HAVE to cover your face), and the addition of 'money' is a red herring. these excuses make no sense
PART FOUR: CLOSE THOSE GATES
it appears that my neurodivergence is 'scary' enough to get me uninvited, REGARDLESS what their disability and mask policies may say
BUT WHY? why is chucks preferred physical presentation valued SO little by the TLA that a THEORETICAL complaint is worth more? is my neurodivergent expression so awful? is my own safety as a queer activist such an afterthought?
is a pink bag with the words 'love is real' scrawled across the front REALLY going to frighten someone when the posters and pamphlets on the way into in panel would have a photo of my masked face saying THIS IS LITERALLY WHO IS ABOUT TO APPEAR BEFORE YOU.
if THAT accommodation is too much, would it really be so difficult to have someone trot out beforehand and make an announcement? to say 'there is someone on this upcoming panel who needs a mask to express this part of himself, if this makes you uncomfortable then this panel might not be for you'.
and really, i have to heckin ask, is this physical expression of my raw inner truth really so hideous and frightening that fear of making someone uncomfortable is a REAL problem?
(a terrifying display of autism. apparently)
i cannot imagine what kind of precautions they need to take before a stage play featuring costumes and masks.
you MIGHT think chucks queerness and left leaning politics could be the issue with this organization, but they have had drag queens as past speakers (also featuring some GLORIOUS makeup and hair that covers almost all of their faces. VERY CURIOUS). regardless, the TLA do not seem like a conservative bunch.
if you are bisexual or an autistic person who is good at 'passing' you probably already know where this is headed, your dang spiderbuckaroo senses are tingling at FULL ALERT. i will say i do not KNOW the real reason why i was uninvited, and i do not have enough information to make any concrete statement of the real answer. there is only evidence that masks have been fine at TEXAS LIBRARY ASSOCIATION events in the past, but not much else to go on.
so the FACTS part of our discussion ends there, but i think it opens us up to talk about some very important feelings that bisexual and autistic buckaroos know well.
THIS is where we take a unfortunate, hurtful moment and turn it into a discussion. this is where we prove love is real.
as someone who is constantly doubted and put through purity tests because of my unique way, we are pushing up against a subject i know well. thats right buckaroos: we are talking GATEKEEPING
AGAIN, i do not know if this is the answer, but someone in my position might be VERY STRONGLY INCLINED TO THINK that a few well-meaning left leaning buckaroos think i am a joke and that this is a character, and that there is something problematic about my work because i am not really a real person.
any upstanding left leaning organization would OF COURSE allow a mask for a neurodivergent buckaroo with an unusual visual presentation, an autistic buckaroo who conquered his chronic pain ONLY by creating this important space... but what about a FAKE autistic buckaroo?
any upstanding left leaning organization would OF COURSE allow a mask for a queer LGBTQ activist standing up for gay and trans rights against a torrent of scoundrels hunting for his legal identity. its a matter of safety... but what about a FAKE queer activist?
let me be very clear for the 100th time: i am a real person. this is not a joke. i am not playing a character. i am really autistic and bisexual. tinglers are sincere and they are not ‘so bad theyre good’. they are just good. camp damascus is not ‘my first serious book’ because my queer erotica is serious. my art is important and real.
when people tell me to unmask they often do not know WHY they want it, and of course one very good reason is innocent curiosity. but there are SOME cases where i start to get THAT feeling--that tingle all of us ‘passing’ buckaroos get when we can sense the real intent behind the poking and prodding. that is the feeling of stumbling into a gatekeepers crosshairs.
if i was to take off my pink bag, what about my face would you analyze to tell if i was REALLY queer. my eye color? my ear shape? if you learned my legal name, would you see if it sounded autistic? is my voice neurodivergent enough?
or is all of that utterly absurd? i am curious what the TEXAS LIBRARY ASSOCIATION thinks.
PART FIVE: GENDERED
this will be the shortest of parts, but it has to be said. i have a very complex relationship with gender, as written about at length here and here. i understand these things can be difficult to parse for some, but i ask that you trust me when i say that the ONLY reason i have been able to talk about my gender and sexuality and learn these things about myself is because of this pink bag. this outward appearance is a direct expression and reflection of my gender journey.
if the texas library association does not care about my appearance as an expression of my autism, then i cant imagine them giving a dang about it as an expression of my gender and queerness. that being said, it is personally very important to me and i think it should be mentioned
PART SIX: SO YOU WANT TO REMOVE AN AUTISTIC QUEER AUTHOR FROM YOUR EVENT BECAUSE PEOPLE MIGHT FIND THEIR DIFFERENCES SCARY
there is a question to be asked here: how could the TLA have done this correctly?
i have one very big piece of advice i would like to shout from the rooftops. please, for the love of sweet barbara, DO ENOUGH RESEARCH to know if this appearance will be a problem and, IF SO, dont extend an invitation in the first place. unique buckaroos with different presentations are constantly left in this place of limbo because we are bombarded with careless actions like those of the TLA. before you consider extending a branch to an artist who might need more accommodations than usual, think to yourself 'CAN WE MAKE THESE ACCOMMODATIONS?'
putting all of this on the shoulders of a single 'buckaroo with a difference' is exhausting. as the TLA has shown, we currently live on a timeline where a buckaroo like myself never really knows if an invite is SOLID without doing a deep dive history lesson on how often a group discriminates and against who.
i did not want to spend my whole family holiday worrying whether or not i should say something publicly or just lie down and shut my dang mouth. i had to consider HOW i should say it. i had to worry whether or not its worth standing up for myself in the face of the largest state library association in the country. i think buckaroos with differences are with me when i say: WE ARE SICK OF HAVING TO DO THIS WORK TO COVER FOR THE POOR BEHAVIOR OF LARGE ORGANIZATIONS WHO TREAT US BADLY
another option would just be to use kindness and common sense and happily accommodate artists with unique presentations to your conventions
PART SEVEN: LOVE IS STILL REAL
i would like to close by saying THANK YOU to my publisher nightfire and editor kelly for standing up for me. they immediately stood firm and had my back. they are the real dang deal. THANK YOU to my management and agent buds dongwon and gino for trotting along beside me. THANK YOU to the folks at the texas library association who initially invited chuck with goodness in their heart and then likely got bowled over by someone else, and maybe even got knocked to the side by a big closing gate.
i hope there are librarians in texas who are still interested in carrying BURY YOUR GAYS when it comes out (which is ironically about someone who creates a space through art to express their queerness where they cant otherwise). libraries prove love is real and what they do IS SO IMPORTANT. it was SO IMPORTANT TO ME as a young buckaroo and i cannot thank you enough. i am not sure if me writing all of this will hurt my sales in some way, but this opportunity to speak about the reality of disability awareness and queer gatekeeping is too important to stay silent. (if you have not already preordered BURY YOUR GAYS then give it a preorder to make up for some texas library losses i guess.)
which leads me to my final thank you. THANK YOU to the buckaroos reading this. yes YOU. i am in the position to stand up and speak my mind against scoundrel forces ONLY because i have the might of you buckaroos by my side. the buckaroo trot is ALL OF OUR TROT and we are ALL HERE TO PROVE LOVE. i cannot tell you how much i appreciate the way you have created a space for me to express these important parts of myself. you have seen this pink mask over my face and saying YES, I ACCEPT YOU, you have literally saved my life. for that i am so thankful.
if you are UPSET by what youve read here, then turn it into something positive. you can support autistic creators, or make a donation to the AUTISTIC SELF ADVOCACY NETWORK
and besides WHO IS REALLY MISSING OUT? this is what it looks like when you invite the worlds greatest author chuck tingle to your event and treat their identity as valid. WE HAVE A DANG GOOD TIME
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KEEP TROTTING INTO THE FUTURE. KEEP KICKING DOWN GATES WHEREVER THEY MAY BE. KEEP PROVING LOVE IS REAL AND PROVING IT TOGETHER. lets go buckaroos - chuck
UPDATE AN HOUR AFTER POSTING:
true buckaroo TJ KLUNE was set to be another author on panel chuck was removed from and has informed me he has now chosen to decline his invitation in support and solidarity with chuck. i am so deeply moved by this. thank you from bottom of heart buckaroo
to be very clear TJ has a huge platform and DOES NOT NEED TO DO THIS. these conferences are great for book sales and he is taking a hit out of pure solidarity. this is queer buckaroos standing up for eachother. i am floored by this kindness and love
please consider checking out his books if they are not already covering your dang bookshelf. chuck blurbed IN THE LIVES OF PUPPETS and i was blown away i heckin loved it
MOST RECENT UPDATE:
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Massage Envy
[Summary]: Jungkook’s been stressed these days. What’s a better way to relax him other than a massage?
[Theme]: Established relationship!AU
[Rating]: 18+, explicit content, blow job, slight ass play, fluff if you squint, lots of making out, very sensual lovin’
[Word Count]: 4,939
[Author’s Note]: This is so descriptive 😀. I wanna say this was one of the first fan fics I wrote…at least of JK. So, bare with it. I tried to edit my terrible writing as much as I could ㅜㅡㅜ
[Masterlist] [Taglist]
“Feel good?” you question as you dig your thumbs into your boyfriend’s shoulders. You sigh happily, knowing that the man beneath you is receiving some form of release, as your fingers circulate into his honey skin. The knots in Jungkook’s muscles completely unravel beneath your fingertips, and you’re determined to unravel every last one of them for the rest of the night. He deserves it, anyways.
You wanted to give your boyfriend relief after the hell he put himself through this week. Jungkook knew it too – his body was too spent to deny help at this point, and the only person he is comfortable with seeing himself this way is you. So, of course, he readily gave himself to you, allowing you to rub away at the damage and replace it with your tender touches.
Jungkook groans in response to you, languidly nodding his head against the pillows. Sitting just below his ass, you press his body further into your shared mattress as you continue to work your hands lovingly into his skin.
Your boyfriend lies face-down on his side of the bed; his long, black hair is fanned out across the silk cover of the pillowcase, creating a little black halo of hair around his skull. The room is somewhat dark, only Jungkook’s table lamp lighting up the small corner of your shared bedroom. The light perfectly reflects the shine of his hair, and you can’t help but admire how well taken care of it is as he shifts his head into a non-verbal “yes”.
“I lovfe yhou sooooo much, bahbe–” Jungkook muffled against the pillow, his face totally smushed in the depths of the fabric. He sounds completely relaxed – voice scratchy and spent – as he allows himself to completely surrender to your touch.
Flustered at his confession, you work your thumbs harder into the knots on his shoulders, loving the way he immediately tenses and then relaxes as you smooth out the tightness within them.
Jungkook came home from practice today tense as a board. His muscles were rock hard, he couldn’t seem to sit still or take the time to breathe correctly, and he had a headache so frustrating and annoying he looked as if he was going to cry.
For the past few days, the man’s been training nonstop, working his body to the breaking point on one day and then working past that point on the next. You knew telling him to just “calm down” or “take a break” would fly right past his head – in one ear and out the other. It is not very useful advice, either. But you’re not good with words, and you didn’t have the right ones to say at the moment, either.
Your boyfriend is stubborn and is probably the most meticulous perfectionist you know; finding a way to comfort him when he is like this is not easy. He almost always goes his own way to get things done, refusing to allow anyone to interfere or help. Jungkook has told you before that it is like receiving a punch to the face when someone notices he looks off or thinks that he needs help with something he has been working on really hard on his own. He wants to appear strong and capable, regardless of his condition. Especially to you.
It has gotten better over time, though. The longer you explore each other, the better he feels about reaching out to you for comfort or help. You love seeing the transformations the two of you have overcome within yourselves since starting a relationship all those years ago. You two have really changed so much.
The smile on your face as Jungkook willingly slumped against you at the mention of a massage reminded you of that change. How, if you were to ask him if you could give him one because of his state a few years ago, he would have totally missed out on the opportunity. But now, he completely embraces your help, your concern, all of you, and all of himself – flaws and all.
“Love you, too,” you chuckle before leaning down to kiss his shoulder affectionately. Reaching for the peach-scented body oil on his nightstand, you quickly pop the lid open and tilt the bottle over his back. The oil slowly trickles onto his skin, the shallow lighting making the liquid on his honey skin all the more self-evident. It tempts you as it slides down his back in slow, thick drops.
“You need to take better care of yourself, babe,” you reprimand him as you spread the oil down to his lower back. “You can’t continue to improve if you don’t listen to your body.”
You watch the pinkish oil smear between your fingers as you touch his skin. The intimacy of the moment and the low lighting of the room makes something within you stir. Giving each other massages isn’t a foreign task between you two. In fact, they’ve developed into small mannerisms of affection in your relationship. They usually shift between gentle rubs on the shoulders while waiting for the other to finish up some online work, a hand massage whilst holding hands, or a tummy rub after eating one too many king-sized spicy ramen bowls. They are small gestures that both you and Jungkook admire.
But something about this massage – right when he needs it the most – makes the butterflies in your tummy relentlessly flutter their wings. The fluster it creates within you prompts you to circle your thumbs deeply along the outer muscles of his spine. Judging from the way he physically jolts as you work the area, you assume that the muscles there were abused the most over the last few days. You keep that in mind as you continue kneading his back.
“Mmhmmm – ahh jagiya — right there,” he groans, dismissing your earlier statement. The way your hands have found nearly every sore spot on his back has Jungkook completely blissed out. It feels so good – almost orgasmic, even – when your fingers rub away at the tension he ignored for so long. It has him thanking the heavens for your wonderful hands and simultaneously cursing at himself for not acknowledging them more in the past.
He must worship them later, he’s decided.
Listening to your boyfriend, you move your fingers firmly down near the lowest parts of his spine, which evokes an even deeper moan from his throat. You can hear it loud and clear, even though the front of his body is pushed like a brick against the sheets as you work your hands on him. It’s so deep, it sends heavy shocks throughout his entire body (and yours).
Sitting on top of him, you can’t help but blush. You aren’t a rock – of course, his moans would spark the dirtiness within you to flush your cheeks into a dark hue. No matter the innocent intent you had prior to the massage, you can’t deny your boyfriend’s reactions to your touches make your pussy ache for more.
He sounds so sexy and raptured. The way he groans when you hit the spots he can’t reach, and the way he whines when you massage the spots that are the tensest – all of it has your cheeks hot and your thighs feeling like jello. You wonder if he can feel the pool between your thighs grow with each moan that physically vibrates through his body and straight to your core.
But this massage is not about you, and these dirty thoughts have no place here. Especially when you’re trying so graciously to knead his muscle-y, hot, tense, sexy back with domestic care. Yep, they have no place here. No place at all. Even though the angle you sit at gives you the perfect view of his toned ass. In fact, you have the perfect view of his entire backside. With every massage against a sore spot, his thighs flex underneath you and unknowingly lift you higher until they relax again.
It’s all too much…his back, skin, ass, thighs, arms… the way he whimpers and moans and tenses from your fingers alone. How can you stay innocent when sounds so sweet underneath you?
You can’t help but want to please him in a different way now – still with your hands, and still to bring him to the pit of relaxation. Just…in a different area…for a different part of the brain.
Your stare wanders around his back. His broad shoulders are wide and stretched out for you, his forearms resting just underneath his pillow while his biceps poke out from the pillow like a triangle, supporting his head from underneath. The skin of his shoulders teases you with memories of when they had the reddest of scratches and the purplest of love bites covering the large surface. You have to make him feel that kind of good tonight. Maybe even better.
Challenging him, you lift your ass off his upper thighs and bring your lips to the very base of his neck before kissing the skin there softly. It’s feather-light, testing the waters before you dive in. You can feel the goosebumps appear under the hand that still works his muscles at his lower back. The other slowly slides up the side of his chest with ease. With the help of the oil, your hand against his warm skin slides like silk underneath your fingertips, feeling his body underneath you slowly and sensually.
Jungkook shivers as your mouth hovers above his skin, waiting for what you’ll do next. He gulps as you make your next move, sucking on the skin you just kissed. Your tongue is so hot and wet, lapping and sucking at his skin with slow passion. He whimpers underneath you, loving the way your touch turned from moral to intimate.
Jungkook would be lying if he said the whole experience wasn’t just as sexy for him, too. You turned him on from the moment you sat on the back of his thighs and dripped the hot oil onto his back. Your heat is so obvious to him – your heartbeat thumping through your pussy, gathering more heat against his thighs with each garbled moan and whimper that left his mouth. You are basically dripping through your night shorts. Although, he cannot tease you for it, because his own cock painfully pokes against the fabric of the mattress as you sit on his ass.
Your hand pressing on his lower back parallels the motion of your hand on the opposite side, just underneath his arm. Both glide to his upper back with the help of the oil as you begin to kiss down his spine. You manage to find a place between a few pecks against his spine to whisper, “Turn around for me,”
And he does in a heartbeat, immensely determined to feel you on his lap. Jungkook doesn’t know if he can wait anymore. He wants to feel you brushing against his length as you spread oil all over his chest and abs. He wants your hands on him again, to feel your fingers torture his skin and keep him begging for more. The thought alone has blood rushing straight to his already straining cock in his tight boxers.
Once settled, you softly plop yourself right on top of his dick, sending him a smirk whilst his jaw tightens at the feeling of his cock resting beneath your core. Jungkook looks at you with need, his bottom lip tortured underneath his front teeth as he watches you start to move your hips tremendously slow against his.
You can feel the way his dick twitches when you place your oily hands firmly against his lower abs, slowly moving up toward his nipples. You rest your hand flat on his chest, trapping his nipples between your index and middle finger. Jungkook lets out an airy grunt as you leisurely bring the two digits together, gently pinching the sensitive buds between them. Jungkook’s breath hitches in his chest as you start to move your fingers with his nipples trapped between them, the sensitivity exciting him beyond belief.
Your hands leave his nipples and continue their northern journey up to his clavicles, then to his neck, and finally his jaw. Softly holding his face in your hands, you lower your face to his. Jungkook’s eyes close in anticipation, his face gently pressing up towards yours, expecting to be kissed. He whines when you antagonize him with just a light brush of your lips against his.
Jungkook breathes deeply against your mouth, exhaling in torment and inhaling with the highest level of self-control he can muster.
“Please,” he begs just above a whisper.
Eyes closed and a tortured wrinkle between his brows, he waits for your lips to break the tension. He is so patient and willing tonight, so you decide to reward him with a firm press of your lips to his, moving against his soft mouth surely.
You can feel the vibration of the moan he lets out from his lips smacking against yours. His voice travels straight to your core, prompting your hips to circle his own faster in search of friction.
Jungkook swipes his tongue against your lips, feeling the desire for your tongue to dance with his own. His hands come up to your jaw, holding you in place against his mouth as if you’d run away if he didn’t hold you there himself.
Jungkook grunts at the way your hips harshly grind against his. He wants more of you – he always wants more of you – but his head is too fuzzy with pleasure to think straight. You’re kissing him stupid.
His body acts on its own, his large hands moving from your jaw to under your night shirt. Hot palms follow his desire to feel you as he cups the area just under your boobs, thumbs swiping back and forth against the skin underneath them. He can feel your heartbeat thumping rapidly underneath his palm, prompting him to lightly circle his thumb over the aroused area of your breast. Jungkook’s mouth still moves in tandem with yours as he tweaks your nipples in between his fingertips.
Jungkook groans at the way you gently bite on his lower lip before trailing your kisses down to his neck. He only gets louder when you find his sweet spot before he can even process the fact that you’re sucking on his neck. Jungkook’s head falls back onto the pillows as his hands move down to grip your ass in his hands. Groping both cheeks firmly, he pulls them apart before grinding them down harshly onto his bulge, giving one of them a harsh smack out of his pure arousal.
You attack his neck, forming bruise after bruise on his precious skin. Your boyfriend flushes his body into yours from pleasure. You want to wreck him so badly. Feeling evil and lustrous, you bite his sweet spot hard, overcome by the man underneath you. Jungkook’s mouth falls open at the feeling, head pressing further against the cushion of the pillow.
Still kissing his neck, you reach for the bottle on the nightstand, pop the lid open with your thumb, and tip the bottle over his chest. The oil runs all over his tanned skin, slowly covering it with a teasing glow over his chest and abs. Raising your head, you stare down at the man beneath you lovingly, looking into his eyes with lust as you continue to grind on his cock firmly.
Your hands venture from his chest to his clavicles, shoulders, arms, and hands, and then back to his pecks, stopping briefly to play with his nipples again.
Jungkook’s breath hitches in his throat as you roll them between your fingers, his eyes fluttering slightly as he tries his hardest to keep eye contact with you.
Impulsively, his hips buck into your own when you come down to suck one into your mouth, licking and biting at the sensitive area of his chest. Jungkook tries to control his breathing, he really does, but it feels so good. Too good. And you haven’t even touched his dick yet.
Grinning at the way his chest uncontrollably tightens from your mouth, you reach for more oil before dripping the liquid down his abs. It trickles over his pack, the six defined rolls acting as hills when the oil attempts to slip over each one.
Picking up the pace, you move your hips faster against him. You watch his eyes flutter closed, enjoying the way your thinly clothed core rubs against the front of his Calvin’s. His cock is completely hard and throbbing against you. You’re driving him mad with everything that is you. He could cum right now if you’d let him, but he knows better.
Fingers spreading the oil across his abs, you enjoy the way your boyfriend’s eyebrows fuse together in pure satisfaction. Jungkook’s head feels dazed and light when you begin to kiss him on the skin just below his ear.
“Look at me, Jungkook,” you whisper against the cartilage of his ear.
Jungkook shivers at your voice in his ear, listening to your breathy sighs against his skin, feeling your wet lips kiss him from his ears to his neck, to his chest, all the way down to his clothed dick behind his black boxers. He stares at you like you asked him to, watching you intensely as you rest between his thighs, lightly kissing his covered shaft.
Jungkooks fists ball the sheets beside him, his head falling back at the feeling before quickly returning back to your gaze.
“Please,” he begs you again, cheeks flushed, ears red, and breath heavy from the teasing you have given him. He tries his best not to buck his hips at you, channeling the desire in his throat instead, swallowing harshly and waiting patiently to be touched.
Jungkook groans when he watches your mouth lick from his base to tip on the thin fabric, tongue teasing his cock.
“Nghhh–” he whines, briefly tilting his head back again in an effort to keep his control. “Fuck, please, baby. I need you so bad.”
Wrapping your lips around his clothed head, you hum deeply against him, sending shocks of ecstasy throughout his entire cock. Jungkook’s thighs tense at the feeling, trying to direct the pressure to his legs instead of having it tempt his vision from falling back again. He needs you, and the only way you will give him what he wants is if he does what is asked of him.
“Okay, baby,” you finally give in, chuckling a little when he sighs loudly in relief. He truly doesn’t know how long he is going to last in your mouth, but he knows for a fact he’s probably going to have one of the best orgasms of his life from just your mouth alone.
Hooking your index fingers under the waistband of his boxers, you slowly and gently tug them down his legs and onto the floor, watching his cock spring up in excitement.
The sight has your mouth watering immediately – dick red and angry, just asking to be sucked on. Licking your lips, you softly cup his balls in one hand and grip the base of his cock in the other. Jungkook’s head falls back, biting his lip so hard he swears he will bleed. His fists scratch at the mattress, trying his best not to release from finally being touched in the area he’s been begging for release from.
“Watch me, Jungkook, or I’ll stop,” you command, giving his balls a squeeze.
“Okay–ffuckk–o-okay,” he moans, quickly bunching up the pillows behind his head to get a better look at you. Jungkook gulps at the sight: your lips are so wet, basically drooling on his cock. Your hands grip his dick in the way he loves best, your face so determined to give him pleasure. He’s never seen anything so goddamn sexy before in his life. And to think you’re all his…the fact makes him go absolutely insane underneath you.
You lick at his tip teasingly, keeping eye contact with him to make sure he’s not taking his eyes off you. Jungkook stares back at you with drunken eyes. He’s flushed and obedient to whatever you do to him, ready for you to play with his pleasure.
You can’t help but give in, teasing him again with your tongue along his frenulum, lapping it up and down on the sensitive fold.
Your hands slowly pump the base of his cock, palms gliding well with the help of the oil from earlier. You don’t go all the way up to his tip, just to edge him further.
“G-god, you’re so fffucking mean,” he laughs tightly in his chest. He’s struggling, but it only makes you smile, loving that he knows that you’re the one in charge tonight.
Looking at his chest as you move your mouth from his frenulum to the tip of his head, smiling at the way he tries to keep his calm when you slick your tongue up and down across the most sensitive part of him. Lips wrapping around his angry tip, you suck him harshly as your wrists flick slowly up and down the rest of his cock, twisting all the way up to your mouth and back down to the base.
“A-ahhh, j-jagi,” Jungkook whines, hands trapping your hair tightly in his fists.
You stare at him the whole time, watching his face go from frustrated to pure euphoria as he struggles to keep his eyes open. After a few more strokes of his cock, one of your twisting hands leaves his dick to skim your fingertip across the skin connecting his balls to his shaft.
Your tongue delves further down his dick, your mouth following afterward, sinking down onto him completely, your nose nudging the skin of his pelvis.
“Nghhh..!” he nearly shouts, legs tensing – almost kicking – against the bedding.
Jungkook’s eyes come back and forth between the back of his skull and your face a few times before you swallow his top at the back of your throat. At this point, his grip on your hair is so tight, your own eyes start to roll back in pleasure.
Jungkook moans so loudly into the empty air of your bedroom that you feel your own slick start to uncomfortably drip down the side of your thigh. Your cunt is pulsing and hot, begging for friction as you deliver pleasure to your sweet boyfriend.
He is just so sexy like this, struggling to follow your demand whilst receiving euphoric pleasure. Your pussy can’t take it anymore, and you suddenly find yourself reaching your free hand down past your night shorts, circling your clit as you trace the outer rim of his ass with your other hand.
Swallowing a few more times around him, you bring your mouth back up to his tip only to sink back down on him again. Gathering a semi-quick pace to fuck him with, you watch his face and thigh muscles contort in euphoric unison. The finger gently plays with his ass coming back and forth between his balls, shaft, and ass as you bob your head up and down on him, your tongue swirling around him altogether.
Jungkook is going absolutely mad, whimpering and moaning as you continue to wrap him around your pretty little finger, watching your beautiful face fuck him with your mouth willingly. Just cause you want to.
It takes everything in him not to say "fuck it" and buck his hips violently into your mouth. He fights his pleasure and your set rule in a bloody war between obedience and desire. You can tell with the way his eyes struggle to not find purchase at the back of his head, and the way his dick twitches in your mouth every so often. His reactions have you rubbing at yourself harder, and before long, you moan into him as your slick gathers around your fingers.
Jungkook hadn't noticed you started touching yourself until now. The slick from your pussy snaps in the air as you harshly rub your fingers against yourself. Jungkook's eyes trail from your face to your hand, circling yourself fast and hard between your legs. At the sight, his thighs tense harshly against you, threatening to close around your body and trap you tightly between his legs. His toes curl at the sight of you touching yourself, the scene so sexy that his cock twitches uncontrollably in your mouth. Pushing a finger into his ass from the loss of eye contact, you watch his eyes and head go back completely, giving up on your request as your finger finds his prostate.
"Ahh, ah—mGHhhh, ba-baby...gonna cum. I'm gonna cum—" He moans euphorically. Jungkook pushes your head down onto his cock quickly, his hips bucking upwards into your throat.
He thrusts into your mouth now, completely disobeying himself and your word. But after seeing you touch yourself just from sucking him off, he can’t listen to anything else but his desire.
You choke against him, tears forming at the edges of your eyes. Jungkook's head seizes deep into the cushion of the pillows, neck tense and strained as he completely empties his balls into your mouth, the hot thick ropes of his release filling you up. You take all of him, refusing to waste a drop.
You keep trailing your finger in, out, and around his balls and ass as you suck his cum into your mouth for what felt like a full minute, watching him pant and moan your name incoherently as he does so. You take it all graciously, enjoying the way his gratefulness for you shows in the way he continues to release himself.
Lifting your mouth from his cock, you rest your forehead against his upper thigh as you whimper and gasp against him. Not soon after, your cunt gushes all over your fingers, letting it soak your panties and shorts. You moan against his thigh while your fingers work through the last few waves of your orgasm.
The two of you breathe harshly against each other for a few minutes. Your bodies sink into the mattress heavily, allowing yourselves to take the time to catch your breath. That is until you break the silence with a shy giggle.
"What's—" He rasps, clearing his throat before continuing. "What's so funny?"
You hum, kissing his thigh lovingly before looking up to his fucked-out face. "You made me cum my pants."
"Heh," He smiles, leaning his head back against the pillows again, giving you a sickeningly hot view of his neck. You watch his Adam's apple move up and down from his next words "Yeah, well, I think you gave me the best head I've ever received in my life. Didn't think sucking cock would make you cum that hard, though."
"I always feel like that when I suck your cock," You smirk, to which Jungkook eyes you, telling you not to make him horny again. You chuckle before climbing up his body to kiss his lips.
Jungkook can't help but smile against you, though still completely dazed from his orgasm. He doesn't care in the slightest that he can taste himself on your lips. He only cares about the way your lips slowly tuck into his in soft, drawn-out motions.
"I love you," You mumble against his cherry lips.
"I love you, too," He smiles sweetly, tucking your hair behind your ear. "Thank you for taking care of me. I know I can ignore self-care sometimes, but I'll try to be better. For both you and me."
Smiling at his words, you kiss the tip of his nose before nuzzling your face into his neck, breathing his familiar scent deeply.
"Although, if I get that kind of treatment every time I go overboard..."
You pinch his shoulder, eliciting a sexy chuckle from his chest.
"Shut up, loser. Acknowledge my massage."
Jungkook turns himself into you, pulling you closer into his chest whilst laughing deeply in your ear, his breath lightly tickling the side of your neck.
"Your massage was wonderful," He whispers, kissing your forehead sweetly. "Let me give you one next time, yeah?"
Taking a deep breath against his chest, you tightly wrap your arm under his, hand coming to grab at his shoulder. Jungkook hugs you as you tighten around his body. His fingers gently trap your chin between them, moving your face up to his.
Jungkook stares at you questionably, waiting for a response. He looks at you with one eyebrow raised, and the other relaxed. The tiny mole underneath his bottom lip is extremely visible from where you stare up at him. His cherry lips tempt you yet again, swollen and red from harsh tugs delivered against them earlier this evening. You watch his dark brown eyes stare down at your own puffy lips. He gives in first, letting his lips feel the velvet of your own. Jungkook sighs into you, rubbing your back soothingly as he swipes and brushes his lips against yours like honey.
Pulling away, you look at his face, feeling an overwhelming amount of love surge through your entire body. He keeps his eyes closed, basking in the feeling of your body so close to his.
"I'd like that," You whisper against his cheek. Jungkook opens his eyes again, tugging his lips upwards as he slowly nudges his nose against yours.
After a few more moments, he gently scoops you into his arms, lifting you up in his strong hold, before carrying you to the bathroom to clean you two up.
----
[End. Do not copy. Original work of @jungkookstatts , 2023]
#jk#jeon jungkook#jungkook#jeon#jeongguk#jungkook x reader#jungkookxreader#jungkook fanfiction#jungkookfanfiction#jungkook fanfic#jungkookfanfic#jungkook x y/n#jungkookxy/n#jungkook x female reader#jungkookxfemalereader#jungkook imagine#jungkookimagine#jungkook oneshot#jungkookoneshot#bts fanfiction#bts fanfic#btsfanfic#bts imagine#btsimagine
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Rough Late Nights
OBEY ME NIGHTBRINGER SPOILERS
Late nights in Cocytus Hall are quiet. There's this... nagging feeling that there should be more noise, like something is missing and you can't place it. You're still not used to not knowing who you are.
The stillness of the large building is eating you from the inside out. There should be some noise, maybe some light footsteps or a faucet running in the next room over. Anything would be better than silence.
Without complete awareness, you get up out of bed. It's not like you were going to get any sleep anyway. It's been like that since you arrived a few nights ago. 'Sleep is for the weak.' That phrase sticks out to you in your sleep-deprived thoughts. Where do you remember hearing that? You think as you quietly twist your doorknob, the old door squeaking with age.
Your feet make faint 'thumps' as you tiptoe through the halls. You don't know where you're going. Anywhere but your newly acquainted silently deafening room would be a great start.
It's dark outside. Looking out the window, you can see various paths barely lit with dim lights, shining just far enough from one to the next in order to not leave the routes in the dark. Cocytus Hall is also dimly lit inside as well. Oil lamps fixated along the walls illuminate only one side of the main hallway instead of the usual two during "day" hours. Or as day as you can get with a dark sky.
Surprisingly, the dark atmosphere that cloaks the underworld brings you more comfort rather than unease. There's that same familiar feeling that overshadows the unknowing of your own life. The possible memories and traumas that you now know nothing about. The relationships with the people you once knew. You don't even know who your parents are. Before you can get too lost in your thoughts, you hear something.
The sound is muffled, indistinct, but there.
Oh. How could you forget that you currently live with someone who claims to know who you are? Who has all the answers you so desperately want to be answered?
"Oh, hello," Solomon looks up from the book in his palms. He's sat in one of the aged library chairs, legs crossed and a pair of reading glasses adorning his face. The lamp on the small side table works well, decorating the room with a gentle, glowing brilliance. The sensation of familiarity hits you again as you see the sorcerer before you.
You barely hear your name leaving his mouth. "Are... you alright?" Solomon's voice was just background noise as your emotions started overwhelming you. Your breathing quickened, and soon came the slight shake of your body, then the tears. It felt wrong to overcome the peaceful aura of the hushed night with wails, so your tears silently left your eyes, streaming quickly down your face as you gave way to what had been affecting you for as long as you could remember.
Next, you felt yourself being brought into a warm embrace. Solomon's arms wrapping around you. Your head was gently pushed into his neck as he cradled your shaking frame. One of his hands rested on the back of your head as the other stroked your back in a calming manner.
If he was saying anything, you couldn't hear him. You were two clouded with your own overwhelming, suffocatingly strong emotions.
~
Word Count: 564
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#obey me#obey me nightbringer#angst#comfort#angst comfort#obey me solomon#obey me x reader#obey me oneshot#obey me one master to rule them all#obey me side characters#obey me side characters x reader#obey me solomon x reader#obey me mc#obey me solomon x mc#obey me solomon x you#no use of y/n#no use of name#gender neutral reader#gender neutral y/n#obey me spoilers#obey me nighbringer spoilers#obey me nightbringer solomon#obey me comfort#obey me angst#obey me hurt/comfort#hurt/comfort#obey me cocytus hall
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from is this your card? pt 2
“Just invite him to play cards with you,” Robin suggests around a massive bite of pizza.
“Shit, Birdy,” he whistles, looking over at her with some mix of awe and alarm. Girl’s gonna choke herself someday. “Thought I was the gremlin in this friendship.”
“Wha’?” She tries to protest; there’s sauce all over her chin.
“Unhinge your jaw like a snake next time, save yourself the trouble.”
She bounces on the lumpy couch cushion, overcome with that specific excitement she gets right before she word-vomits useless trivia. “Did you know a python can open its mouth up to a hundred and eighty degrees?”
Eddie stares at her blankly.
Robin squirms.
“…What about a king cobra?”
“One-thirty-five,” she answers without missing a beat and reaches for a second slice, dropping the uneaten crust back in the box. “And, anyway, I take it back. You’re not allowed to invite Steve over or hang out with him without me because the two of you are going to be a total nightmare for me if you ever manage to get it together and start going out.”
Eddie arranges her abandoned crust beneath two pieces of pepperoni on his paper plate to make a frowny face. “But Robi-i-inn,” he whines, pitching his voice all high and stupid.
“Please tell Mr. Pepperoni that his pouting game needs work and that I am not swayed.”
“Rude.” He discards his plate and flops back on the couch with a put-out groan. Slings an arm over his eyes just to be dramatic. “This would be so much easier if he weren’t so intimidatingly hot. Why does he have to be so hot?”
Robin sucks a lump of cheese off her thumb. “I don’t know. Is he hot?”
“Dude.” Eddie sits back up, eyeing her with a blank stare and considering tossing her ass out of his living room. Is Steve Harrington hot? IS STEVE HARRINGTON HOT? Jesus Christ.
“What? He’s hairy, okay? Point your creepy laser vision somewhere else!”
“Excuse you! My eyes are not creepy! I have it on good authority that they’re pretty.”
“They’re piercing.”
“Whatever. You just can’t appreciate my beauty, Buckley. Or Steve’s, apparently.”
“You think I’m beautiful?”
Robin and Eddie whip around, matching deer-in-headlights expressions at the sound of another voice in the room, and there’s Steve, suddenly, leaning against the door frame (Eddie has no idea how; dude’s a ninja or some shit), looking bashful but quietly pleased with his arms folded across his chest. Eddie desperately wants to bite the ring of freckles blooming on his tanned forearm.
He looks at Robin, and they both turn back to Steve and oh so elegantly bleat out: “Uhhhh…”
Smooth. Good save, Munson, real nice.
Robin pulls it together first, smiles wide and says, “Hi, Steve. Eddie was just being a homophobe as usual.”
“Dude! You have got to stop fucking accusing me of that shit, I’m literally gay!”
“Gay men are not immune to lesbophobia, Edward. It’s honestly a little concerning that you don’t know that.”
“Oh, holy shit, why do I hang out with you?”
Robin licks her teeth in smug delight and kicks at his thigh. “Because you cherish our time together.”
“Jesus Christ.”
“You think I’m an undeniable joy.”
“Steve. Steve, please get her out of my house.”
Eddie puts his head in his hands, but Robin’s picking up steam now, hopping up onto the couch cushion and brandishing a pizza crust like a torch, hoisting it high into the air, exclaiming, “Nay! A light, even! A shining beacon in your sad, dark little life!”
“Steve, I am begging you, man.”
Steve’s a real one because he doesn’t say a word, just crosses the room and chucks Robin over his shoulder like a sack of flour and carries her flailing out onto the front porch.
#hell honk#steddie#steddie fic#eddie munson#robin buckley#steve harrington#platonic stobin#platonic edbin#my writing#my fic
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wait what were the bible references in ninjago. i caught the iron sharpens iron one but there were more??
ok well not really references but more so connections and parallels (intentional or not)
so obviously the one everyone’s brain jumps to would probably be lloyd and jesus and like,, yes because you know;
prophesied savior of the world, to destroy the hold evil had over humanity, arrives as a powerless child instead of a mighty conqueror, (grand)son of god
you get my point
but you know who really has more interesting parallels with jesus’s death?? garmadon.
he is, after all, actually the son of god in ninjago
oh and btw this is like where the idea that this is more me doing a literary analysis on this instead of saying these are direct parallels to one specific part of the Bible.
so let’s start with the idea of snakes. there’s a lot of them in ninjago and in the Bible, generally meant to symbolize evil in both contexts.
one snake in particular has extra significance, the great devourer, which parallels the serpent (satan) in the garden of eden. both are kind of this, embodiment of evil that find their way into a peaceful, early in time, garden or general sanctuary where humanity is still good. so in ninjago terms this would be the beginning of wu and garmadon’s lives before garm gets bit and turned evil. there’s also this interesting connection between the action of biting (eve with the fruit of knowledge of good and evil, which brought sin into the world, and garmadon being the one to get bit and this brings evil into the creation of god (fsm). but anyways now we have our tainted humanity and this conflict between good and evil in a way.
then we skip to the scene where garmadon and lloyd fight in ‘the final battle’ and you get this weird double parallels of jesus in both garmadon AND lloyd.
garmadon, the son of god, gets all the evil in the world placed into him, and he is publicly killed for it (i know he didn’t actually die but yeah it like cleansed him so same point still stands), when really he didn’t do anything wrong. he was bit by accident, almost the universe’s sacrifice. (jesuscore lol ok but actually think the crucifixion)
but you also have lloyd, who is the savior, who is the one doing the cleansing of evil, he is the light
dialogue parallels here:
overlord: “Where there is light, there will always be shadow”
lloyd: “Unless my light is bright enough!"
//
john 1:15
“The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.”
not to mention garmadon’s name is the word Armageddon just mixed up so there’s that
oh and this was definitely intentional
#ciftr gets ninjago fans to read bible verses was not on anyone’s 2023 bingo#ninjago#lego ninjago#ciftrchats#ninjago lloyd#lloyd ninjago#christianity#literary analysis#media analysis#ninjago theory#ninjago garmadon#garmadon ninjago#ninjago season 1#ninjago lore#ninjago season 2
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Aaaand it happened again: This thing called live – I literally finally enjoyed my time as short-term expat and it started with a trip to Copenhagen and Stockholm after Easter. Copenhagen was cute, but Stockholm got me hooked! Even though my first day there was very cold and rainy I still felt so content (the next days had been blessed by sunshine). After the winter in Norway and the long dark I felt as if I was eventually able to breath again.
I love Norway’s nature, the language, the cute colorful houses everywhere and even Oslo in winter, with the warm and cozy fairy lights has grown on me. But even without covid there is this common social distance and additionally this pressure of conformity that made me really hate my stay here.
As I returned from Stockholm to Oslo though, something had clicked, and the sun did it’s work as well: It was as if the city had woken up from a slumber.
In Stockholm I visited, among other places, Stockholm stadsbibliotek and Kungliga biblioteket, two of the most stunning libraries I’ve seen so far! And although it was a holiday trip, working on my thesis to spend more time in those places was worth the deal!
- After returning to Norway and soaking up spring and early summer here like the most dried out sponge ever, I didn’t work as much on my thesis as I wish I had. And there it is again: The pressure, the imposter thoughts, the guilt….
So currently my days here are like the weirdest rollercoaster that ever was built – they contain anxiousness and not being able to breath but also feeling free and happy; they contain guilt for not having achieved what I had planned to as well as being proud to have overcome the hard winter. They consist of going out, being social enjoying the nature and ignoring everything on my to-do-list, but also staying in and not being able to focus on my tasks because come on, the sun is shining! :D
Anyway – I’m in the process of letting myself enjoy the last couple of weeks here as much as possible and not think about it too much. There will be time to focus on the thesis soon enough.
ok, bye :)
*waving awkwardly*
#master thesis#studyblr#history student#travel#journey#bibliothek#biblioteka#books & libraries#stockholm#oslo#expat#trying
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Heir To The Lands Chapter 29
Masterpost
Everyone Wants An Answer
The night had been terrible. Ty had cried himself to sleep in Kit's comforting embrace and the blonde hadn't slept at all out of the fear Ty would wake up in the middle of the night for a toilet break and cry some more in the bathroom.
Taking care of Ty was his number one priority at the moment.
Livvy's spirit and his foster parents were wisely leaving Ty to Kit, recognizing a small group of people fussing over him would stress him out more then just letting Kit handle it.
Kit stared at him as he slept, and only left the bed to close his curtains when the sun began to shine.
Ty slept and slept until his phone started buzzing. He stirred in his sleep and Kit couldn't help but glance at the object and wondering if Ty would be okay with him answering a probably concerned Jules.
But thank the Angel, he didn't have to. Because his own phone also started buzzing and he saw both of them were texted by Dru.
He quickly placed Ty's phone on the nightstand to read the text she had send him,
'It's a bit of a story, but I made it back safely from Faerie. I did require the help of Ragnor and he reminded me of being on the verge of a panic attack. What did Gwyneth and Jaime say? Because I think the Shadow World is already feeling whatever threat the Seelie Queen is planning.'
Kit was euphoric yet anxious at once at Dru's message and he slowly shook Ty awake. The boy's pale eyelids fluttered until his gaze landed on Kit. After a moment of hesitation, Kit spoke, "Ty, I know your mind is too overcome right now, but you need to know Dru made it back! Somehow, she came across Ragnor and that's honestly all she texted me. But I wanted you to know she is safe."
Ty's hands started fluttering as his mind was visibly racing, and Kit tried stroking his hair out of the Blackthorn boy's face, wondering what he should do to help Ty process. "Is it okay if I get you some tea?" He asked hesitantly and after a minute of silence Ty started nodding which Kit took as a yes.
Alec had called his friends to his and Magnus' apartment. Magnus had been overtly dotting by spoiling their children rotten with toys so they would be distracted for a couple of hours because they refused to go to bed once they realized that their uncles and aunties were coming over. Toys R Us is shutting down anyways, he said.
Alec did not know enough about bankruptcy or mundane parenting to fully understand the picture of mundane kids and their apparant new religion of tablets, but he did not have the energy to care.
Because all his mind was consumned with, where thoughts on the raid. For someone had broken into his office and stolen all kinds of files, including his correspondence with Manuel.
He was sick with worry and Magnus' earlier phone call with Ragnor was enough to have his husband grow pale and quiet.
For Magnus to look that distraught, it would need to take a whole lot.
Alec's heart was resting in his shoes as he raced to the door as he heard the familiar doorbell and the loud yapping between Jace and Simon.
Dru had sent the text, Thais was gone from their room.
She was willing to bet she was assigned to the student patrol- this was a program Luke thought up to help the New York Enclave by easing up their burdens whilst simultaneously having the opportunity to train students in actual combat.
The New York neon lights ruled the dark skies as all of her thoughts floated through her head, finally getting to process everything that happened.
Jaime's terrible state, meeting Ash Morgenstern again and Ragnor's worrying booth. It all sank down her mind like an anchor dropped in the vast ocean.
She laid down on her bed, groaning at the long day she had.
"Kit, what on earth has the Seelie Queen got planned for you?" She asked the ceiling just as the door to her room opened. Dru shot up as not one, but several people entered her room. She was just about to reach for her stele as the light switch flicked on.
Thais, Laura, Tomas, Zeynep and Tavi were all standing in the room. Thais looked worried but annoyed with Tomas behind her exuding his usual calm and collected aura, Laura looked confused, Zeynep looked tired and Tavi was looking at her with one brow raised before scanning the room with disinterest.
"Welcome Dru. Can you explain to me the meaning behind my brother's text?" Tomas asked as he held up his phone expectantly and Dru knew her long day wasn't over yet.
#twp#the wicked powers#tsc#the shadowhunter chronicles#shadowhunters#shadowhunter chronicles#alec lightwood#kit herondale#kit herongraystairs#dru blackthorn#ty blackthorn#kit x ty#thais pedroso#magnus bane
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IN CHARACTER DATE : late evening, may 2nd, 2024.
TRIGGER WARNINGS : mention of blood, threats of violence and death.
THEY TAKE HER VOICE FIRST. the litany of curses and insults hurled towards them from the very moment that they touch down is silenced with a wave of rodolphus lestrange's wand and though she gives it her all, it is not a spell that she can overcome. she struggles against the invisible bonds, kicks at the shins of those nearest to her, even sinks her teeth into the softest part of a hand that grabs her too roughly at one point and is rewarded with the taste of blood in her mouth - but eventually, it becomes obvious that she is nothing to them except the means to an unknown end, and they all treat her as such.
she's a nuisance. she is, at times, a literal pain, her efforts resulting in a hiss here, a painful jab there, and just once the uttering of CRUCIO that sends her crumpled to the ground - the masked figure who punishes her like this is punished in turn by rodolphus and then disappears entirely, but she doesn't rise from the ground again. instead she pulls herself into the corner of the concrete mausoleum they have thrown her unceremoniously into and makes herself small.
there isn't a moment where she's left alone or goes unwatched. they give her no opportunity to even try and run, though escape itself is little more than an unattainable idea. her wand lies in someone else's pocket and this makes apparition impossible, and even if she could get past the death eaters that stand waiting for further command, she doesn't know where she'd run to. he had apparated them in at the edge of an overgrown graveyard. the gathering storm seemed to be magically held at bay, but this small mercy did little to help her get her bearings- the night was broken by a handful of lanterns and the moon hanging in the sky, but the total lack of light had made it impossible for her to discern any real information about where they were, now.
she has no idea how long she's been there, her only real measure of time the moon and how high it hangs above them. when it is perfectly positioned in the grubby window over the door, shining stubbornly through the storm clouds above, the death eaters watching over her receive a muffled command from someone just out of her sight and move as one to grab her. it's a brief struggle, but a struggle all the same. she fights against them with all her strength, soundlessly screaming in their faces even after they manage to get a grip under her arms and drag her up to her feet, but she is again struck by how little they actually care. their end goal is too important, she realizes, for these simple protests to faze them.
( she decides then and there to continue making their lives as difficult as possible for as long as she has her own, tugging against them with every forced step and keeping up the voiceless string of trash talk all the while ).
they drag her out into the center of the graveyard. even suppressed the way it is, the wind is relentless. it pulls at her hair and stings her eyes, but she forces herself to look anyways, to take in every detail of the scene before her : a dozen death eaters, fewer than she thought there'd be, are dotted around ancient headstones in dark cloaks & silver masks. they roughly circle the upturned soil of one particular grave that lies before what looks to be a makeshift altar.
it is there, behind a small and bubbling cauldron, that bellatrix stands. rodolphus, entirely ignorant of her arrival, is in the process of carrying forward something distinctly human sized and covered completely by layers upon layers of black fabric. her stomach lurches, but she gets no glimpse of what lies within to confirm her sick suspicion before he lays it down so very gently in the turned over dirt and straightens up, once again.
he takes her from her guard - deftly avoiding the teeth she now bares at him - and tugs her closer than she wants to be to the grave. her gaze wanders, unbidden, but she is relieved not to see pallid skin or a sunken face looking out at her from within the mess of fabric and looks away again, quickly, before she can find hints of either. the flickering light from the nearest lantern allows her to read the inscription carved into the nearest tombstone : "UNKNOWN WOMAN, DIED DECEMBER 31ST, 1942. MAY YOU REST IN PEACE."
her heart hammers like a frantic bird inside her chest, and when she looks back to bellatrix, the mere action of looking seems to set something into motion.
"my friends," she calls to the gathered crowd, arms held wide, palms out. "my most loyal servicemen. tonight, our lord will rise again, stronger than he's ever been-" a few of the number ( not lucius, she realizes with a start, who remains stoic at the back of their group ) whoop and cheer at this, earning themselves a serene smile from bellatrix. she silences them after a long and permissive moment with a simple wave of her hand, beginning to move away from the altar. "ten years after his most bitter loss, we return him to glory so that he can take back what was stolen from us and finally finish what he started."
each word brings her a step closer to rodolphus until she stops before them both and gives an almost imperceptible nod of her head to one of the nearest masked figures. they pull out their wand and though she tenses, she needn't worry, not yet - the flourish they direct towards her does nothing but loosen her tongue. her voice, returned.
so frightened that she's at a complete loss for words, she just spits at her.
it all happens so fast : bellatrix moves as if she might slap her and once again she tenses for the impact, automatically recoiling into rodolphus' arms, but the movement shifts in mid air. she grabs her roughly by the chin, instead, her fingers pressing so firmly into her skin that she'll almost surely bruise. she hisses, "these are the last moments of your life, ginevra weasley. tread carefully."
"if that's true, what's the point?" she's hoarse and defiant. even now. "if you're just going to kill me-"
"my lord will have that honor. you'll be the first to fall at his hand once he returns to full strength-" matter of fact. simplistic, in her approach. they've all long learned that bellatrix makes promises, not threats. "i need you alive, first, but i don't need you intact." she shudders in spite of herself, and bellatrix intones, "good. so we understand each other."
"why are you doing this?" the words burst from her, desperately, but bellatrix pays her no mind. she lets go of her chin and makes to move away again, forcing her to raise her voice and shout after her, "there's power in understanding, isn't there? just like in a name. at least tell me what i'm dying for."
she turns to smile at her, then, as if she's nothing more than a petulant child. when she answers, it's with the air of indulgence. "you're not the brightest of blood traitors, are you?" there's a chorus of laughter from the gathered crowd, though she doubts any of them truly know, either, "i'm not surprised you haven't worked it out, yet."
"so tell me," she tries to demand, hating how much it sounds like a plea.
luckily for her, something about the picture she paints appeals perfectly to bellatrix's sense of showmanship.
"you were there when he came back. you saw him-" is it just her imagination or does the black cloth in the dirt stir at bellatrix's words? she tries not to look. "he wasn't… whole. i didn't know how to fix him, then. i didn't know for a long time, but i do, now. it's you. you're connected."
"you're wrong," comes strangled response, too quick to be anything but instinct.
"am i?" bellatrix laughs, again, but there's a steel edge to these words. an old wound, reopened. still bleeding, by the sounds of it. "you knew him more closely than even i did, once. you had him inside your head."
"that was a horcrux. i was a child-"
"it was a part of him, all the same," her eyes flash, her voice rising by an octave. it's too late ; she won't accept any other kind of truth. "you were connected then and you're connected even more, now. what happened in the department of mysteries was no coincidence-"
"you're crazy-"
she moves forward without warning, just as swift and just as deadly as her old house emblem ; this time, she actually does hit her, the sound of her palm against the soft skin of her cheek lost to the roaring wind that surrounds them. she doesn't let up, either. she grabs her by the chin, again, forcing her to look her in the eye, "i was going to kill you for what you did, that night. i was going to make you suffer in ways you couldn't even imagine. you only continue to draw breath because i realized how important you were to right what went wrong. the sacrifice that didn't die, tied to my lord for all these years with invisible string."
her eyes sting, again, and an unwanted tear rolls down her cheek.
"you're the key to all of this. one of them, anyway."
#nox.plotdrop018#nox.important#hp rp#harry potter rp#appless rp#fandom rp#canon rp#oc rp#mumu rp#established rp
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Medicine - Part IV
Nothing too explicit but 18+ and NSFW anyway.
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Sasuke tenses.
It isn’t the right time, he thinks to himself. It certainly isn’t the right place. They are on a classified mission that contains a high level of risk, with far too much at stake should they blow their own cover. And a grave mistake has already been made in disclosing his relationship with Sakura to his reckless inmate.
But his wife is close enough for him to feel the warmth radiating from her body. Close enough for him to be overcome by the sweetness of her familiar perfume, an enticing fragrance that sings to and sirens his senses.
This is perilous, he knows. For they have been too far apart, for far too long, and the itching desire to touch her, to return the affection she has always offered him so freely, is maddening. It is unbearable.
He opens his mouth in another attempt to warn her - only to hesitate. The way he often has over the years, when confronted by her presence. She presses closer, and his resistance wavers, for the touch of her rosy, soft, plump lips is an ignition that sends a dangerous hum vibrating through Sasuke’s body. Like tinder to a flame, heat rushes through his veins, setting him alight.
He burns. How he burns and yearns for this woman. She makes him burn in ways she does not even perceive, in ways that have restored meaning and purpose to his life. It was Sakura’s love that thawed the numbing, jagged ice that had once encased his bruised and tattered heart. It was her love that had gently coaxed him into trusting her, into relying on her, into daring to dream of a better future for himself - a future in which there was light and warmth. A future away from the bleak, cold darkness and loneliness he had once believed was his only possible destination.
It had been her kindness and patience, and her forgiveness, which had allowed him to begin healing. Allowed him to believe, for the first time since the night of his clan’s massacre, that he was truly worthy of love. Worthy of family. Worthy of redemption and happiness. That he was far more than the last survivor of a cursed and damaged bloodline.
She and Sarada are his redemption. They are the family he had once believed to be forever lost to him. His wife has no idea just how much she has given to him, no idea of the immeasurable gift of her unconditional love, and just how much it means to Sasuke.
He has never been able to tell her with words. He has never been the sort to pen romantic poems, or articulate declarations of feelings. But what is not explicitly expressed out loud, is shared like a secret kiss in every exchanged glance. In the fire and passion and desperation and reverent worship of their touches.
Touches that are too far apart, because duty calls him away from her side too often.
Touches of which he is starved.
When her fingers rake gently through his hair, his fragile hesitation splinters. One minute, he tells himself. Just one minute, and he will end this. He closes his eyes and parts his lips, ravenous to taste her, drawing her tongue into a sensual, frenzied dance that causes their mingling breaths to quicken.
He knows it is a mistake the moment he does it. She is reeling him in, and he can feel himself falling into her honey trap. His heart slams against his chest, and an approving mewl escapes her lips when he deepens the kiss, and brings his hand up to cup the back of her head as she pushes the front of her body against his.
The sound is like a delirium-inducing drug, one that robs him of his senses. Images fill his mind, images his Sharingan has imprinted there, of his tempting wife sprawled beneath him, cheeks flushed, rose hair tousled like a halo around her head, of Sakura writhing and moaning and sobbing and gasping his name in need. Of the bewitching way she looks when she comes undone and abandons herself to sheer bliss, of the pure devotion that shines in her eyes when she strokes his face and whispers that she loves him.
Love that she gives so readily. Love that he consumes so selfishly, so gluttonously.
The last time they had made love before he had departed, it had been slow and trembling and gentle. But there is nothing gentle about their hunger for one another now. It is predatory. It is carnal. It is devastating. A ravenous, feral beast that claws at them, that demands to be let loose.
She grabs at the belt of his trousers, tugging and fumbling to unclasp it. He fists his hand through her hair, and tugs in response, breaking the kiss and eliciting a sharp gasp from his wife. Dipping his head, he lays claim to her delectable throat, sucking and kissing and biting at the spots he knows her hair will conceal, and is rewarded with an approving moan.
“Oh… Sasuke-kun…”
His parched, famished tongue licks up her flesh, as if lapping up an elixir of nectar. He has never much liked the taste of sweet, sugary things. Sakura is his only. His only exception.
Winding an arm around her waist, he lifts Sakura easily off the ground, and sets his wife on the metal work-top. Medical supplies clatter to the ground, but in that moment, she succeeds at last in unbuckling his belt, and Sasuke does not care about the noise they are making. All he can hear is the rushing of blood in his ears, the thundering of his heartbeat. His lips devour hers once more, his mind and body singularly focused on one task. He knows what they both crave and need from one another, and he will honour the sacred vows he made to take care of her in every single way.
The kiss is bruising, punishing, claiming and consuming. A fiery brand that is raw and ruinous and fuelled with mind-fogging lust. A rushed midnight tryst is not how Sasuke prefers to worship his spouse’s sensual body. He much prefers to take his time, in a sanctuary that is private and wholly their own.
But the words Jiji spoke to him about married couples remaining close together haunt him. They have sparked fresh guilt within Sasuke over the many months each year that he is forced to spend away from Sakura and their daughter.
How much of their lives has he missed? And how much will he continue to miss protecting Konoha from the shadows? What if it is not enough security for Sakura and their child? What if this wasn’t the marriage she had always dreamed of and expected with him?
What if another man attempted to approach Sakura? With Sasuke gone so often from the village, it is perhaps not so far-fetched for ordinary civilians to assume that she might be single, and raising their child alone. Sakura is beautiful, clever, successful and talented. Any man in his right mind would try his luck.
The very idea gives way to a twisting, unpleasant throb deep within the confines of Sasuke’s chest, and he kisses Sakura harder, with a desperation that borders on frustration. He loves her. It does not matter how far apart they are. To him, they are always connected. No time or distance will ever change his feelings. He cannot understand why Jiji said those damned words, sparking uncertainties that had never before even occurred to Sasuke. Equally as much, he cannot bear the thought of another man trying to move in on Sakura, daring to touch Sakura-
His thoughts fracture, and his chest heaves as she slips a hand inside his pants, eliciting a pained hiss from his lips. He aches for her. The ache is unbearable, and demands immediate remedy and relief. A remedy and relief only her touch and body can give to him.
He pushes her skirt up over her hips with his hand, then pulls aside her underwear. And when he finally slips inside her velvet warmth and joins them together as one, he is overcome with sensation. With indescribable feeling.
And he knows.
He knows from her sigh as he sinks his teeth into the supple, soft flesh of her lower lip. He knows from the way she trembles against him, from the way she eagerly hooks her legs around his waist and holds him tightly to her as he begins to thrust, hard and fast, against her. He knows as she gasps his name and he groans hers against her neck. That she is his. And he is hers.
And he knows that nothing, and no-one, can ever break their bond, and the sincerity and strength of the love they share.
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End of oneshot. Sorry it took a while to post the last bit. If you enjoyed my writing, please consider reblogging and reading my other work.
Thanks for reading.
#SasuSaku#Sasuke Retsuden#Oneshot#I'm still on hiatus#This was a one-off because I was inspired by the manga#Feels weird writing canon!verse SS#Fanfiction
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oh yeah, thing i've been slightly curious about since i never finished metal fusion or even mfb as a whole- what IS ryuga's whole deal anyway? like what was that guy's problem is he just Like That or is there somethin else goin on with him
In short: Ryuga's actions weren't his own. L-Drago (who is an amalgamation of the souls of the most evil humans in history) was using him as a vessel, and he spends the following 2 seasons trying to get revenge on Doji
Long version: The first beys ever created were from an island kingdom in the South Pacific. The king, Hades, made a bey out of a meteorite that had passed through the Black Sun. (the physical manifestation of cosmic evil). The king was then possessed by the bey (Proto Nemesis) and attempted to destroy the world (this is based on the Nemesis Hypothesis, a real life attempted explanation for several of Earth's mass extinctions). Zeus, the ruler of a neighboring kingdom, with the help of 4 other bladers, went on to fight Hades. They battles long and hard, and just when it seemed Hades would win, the Earth itself swallowed him and sealed Nemesis away. With his final breath, Hades laid a curse to make sure he would reawaken eventually
Doji was part of a cult trying to bring back Nemesis, believing that humanity's continued existence was an act of defiance against fate. Doji grew tired of waiting, so he sought out Ryuga (who in the manga was a dormant emperor of a long-gone dragon clan) to control Lightning L-Drago. Lightning L-Drago was created as one of the earliest beys, and was generally used by evil tyrants. L-Drago absorbed part of each user's soul, growing into the embodiment of humanity's greatest evils. During Fusion, Ryuga was controlled by L-Drago. L-Drago's influence grew stronger the more powerful he became, and he eventually turned on Doji. When Ryuga tried to resist, L-Drago entered his body and started transforming him into a dragon-human hybrid. He was freed from its control during Fusion's finale
During season 2, Tsubasa has been infected with a small fragment of L-Drago (which manifests as an evil version of himself in his mind). Once the main characters realize what is going on, they send Hyoma to find Ryuga and ask for his help. Ryuga had at this point overcome L-Drago's evil by sheer willpower. Ryuga goes to Tsubasa (who is on a rampage on an Italian guy's backyard) and basically tells him "don't fight it. The dark power brings out the worst parts of you, but rejecting it makes it stronger." He then picks up Tsubasa's unconscious body and delivers him to Gingka. Gingka, confused, challenged him to a battle. There, Ryuga gives him some advice about being one with your bey and leaves. Tsubasa accepts his darkness as a part of him, thus overcoming it
Ryuga takes up a life of walking around the wilderness indefinitely. Then some bladers try to capture him and he beats their asses. He learns that they had been sent by Dr. Ziggurat, Doji's former employer (and part of the Nemesis cult). Ryuga is pissed at Ziggurat because he blames them for L-Drago. He fights on Gingka's team in the world championship finals (as half of Gingka's team was hospitalized at the time). Turns out that Ziggurat was using the world championships to conduct research on beys so he could create Twisted Tempo to power the Spiral Core (think of a nuclear reactor but powered by a black hole. Just turning it on created a desert in New York). Ryuga, pissed, tried to destroy the Spiral Core, but simply causes a meltdown (which threatens to destroy the planet). He then, alongside Gingka, yeet it into space so it can detonate away from everybody
This explosion fulfills the prophecy of Nemesis' return (which involved "a bright light shined in the heavens," which a nuke counts as). A star fragment comes down to Earth, but it splits into 10 parts. 1 part goes to Nemesis, and the other go to 9 Legendary Bladers. These bladers are the descendants of the original bladers who fought Nemesis (representing Mercury, Venus, Mars, Jupiter, and Saturn), as well as 4 bladers to represent Earth's 4 seasons (spring, summer, autumn, and winter). The Four Seasons Bladers have the power to create Zeus's Barrier, which is the only known power capable of defeating Nemesis. Ryuga is the Blader of Summer
Ryuga decided he's going to 1v1 Nemesis because fuck teamwork. Kenta decides to follow him around until he convinces Ryuga to help. What follows is Kenta unknowingly undergoing the same training as Ryuga (which mainly consists of walking through deserts, mountains, jungles, etc.). Ryuga says that if Kenta can make himself be taken seriously by Ryuga, he'll join Gingka. Ryuga and Kenta then have their own side adventures, including a battle with Tsubasa at the Tower of Babel. Ryuga encounters the rest of the main cast at the Beyster Island Tournament, where he says he wants to absorb the power of all the Legendary Bladers because fuck 'em, however he's stopped by Kenta (who he's grown to respect). Kenta actually manages to crack L-Drago's facebolt during a battle, which is when Ryuga, even if he doesn't admit it at the time, started taking Kenta seriously
Ryuga and Kenta show up when Nemesis is revived. However, Doji's back and being a dick. Ryuga, rather than help form Zeus's Barrier, breaks formation and tries to 1v1 Nemesis to prove a point to Doji (that Ryuga is truly the strongest blader to ever live). The temple they're fighting in collapses. Everyone escapes, but Kenta is separated from Ryuga
Nemesis goes to the Lost Kingdom of King Hades, which it raises from the bottom of the ocean. Everyone heads there to battle Nemesis before he calls the Black Sun to Earth. Ryuga is the first to arrive, and 1v1's Nemesis. He kills Doji in the process (he blasts him off a cliff. Doji's body dies, but Merci the French computer rescues him and uploads Doji's mind to a computer. Don't worry, Doji dies for real in season 4). Ryuga puts up a decent fight, but Nemesis beats him and puts him on the brink of death. When Kenta and everyone else arrives, it's too late. Zeus's Barrier can no longer be made since one of the 4 bladers required is missing. Still, they fight Nemesis, and unlike the first time, don't get their asses handed to them almost immediately (though they are on the losing end). Ryuga uses the last of his power to give Kenta the piece of the star fragment in L-Drago. Ryuga says that Kenta managed to be taken seriously. Then Ryuga dies. Kenta, now with Ryuga's power, manages to turn the tides of the battle, and eventually win
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Thinkin about my old ideas for "I DISAGREE: An Ibuki Mioda SDR2 Protag Swap AU" and remembered what I wanted to post next. Previously, I talked about how Ibuki might be like as a protagonist, but I didn't get into what she'd be like during the class trials. So, let's get into it!
One Step Closer to the Edge: Ibuki in the Trials
Hajime and the other DR protagonists approach class trials by piecing together clues and finding holes in arguments. Ibuki has never shown an aptitude for that kind of reasoning. She contributes almost nothing during the two class trials in which she’s present.
To be clear, Ibuki’s not a total idiot, either - though it’d be great if she’s briefly stumped when asked to name the number of sides in an octagon (“Rock stars don’t need to know calculus!” “Ibuki, it’s basic geometry …”). If she hopes to determine the killer and save everyone else, she’ll need to tap into different strengths:
Perfect listening! In Chapter 1, Ibuki boasts about her extraordinary ability to … tell which of her classmates is talking when it’s dark. Not that impressive, with everyone having a distinct voice and manner of speech, but I’ve always loved the notion that her hearing is enhanced as a result of her Ultimate Light Musician talent. Imagine an SDR2 that includes Mass Panic Debates before their introduction in V3. Years of discerning the layers in complex instrumentals would help Ibuki sort through the noise of the hysteria and find the arguments that matter most.
Perfect recall! What is impressive about her contribution in Chapter 1 isn’t that she recognizes her classmates’ voices, but that she remembers everyone’s exact words and the order in which they talked. That’s quite a memory! Something like that could really come in handy down the line, with mysteries built around a need to carefully remember events. Maybe Monokuma could even decide that instead of offering a limited number of details in a Monokuma file, he should just destroy all the e-Handbooks. That would require Ibuki to exercise this ability like never before.
BS detector! I swear it’s not just because I’m a big fan of the mystery-of-the-week TV series Poker Face. Look, Ibuki’s living her truth right now, but that’s only after spending a long time hiding behind a conformist facade. That experience helps her recognize when someone isn’t being fully honest. (It’s a good thing this is just a narrative and not an actual Danganronpa game!) As fellow Poker Face fans might recognize, this seemingly busted ability comes with its own challenges: figuring out exactly why someone is lying, learning to discern when someone only believes they’re telling the truth, and so on. Then there’s Byakuya Togami, who seems honest but has something just a little off about him.
There’s also her sharp wit and fair level of intelligence. Moreover, she has a genuine fondness for her classmates, striving to overcome their barriers and see who they are at their core. All this should combine to make her a shining star on the stand. Of course, she’ll get by with a little help from her friends … but that's for another post.
Anyway, I'm surprised more Danganronpa protag swaps don't account for the differences that their stars have from the actual protags. It's fun to think of how each character might use their own strengths to guide their approach to this kind of situation.
PREV: What Would Ibuki Be Like as the Main Character of SDR2?
NEXT: The Major Side Characters
#I DISAGREE: An Ibuki Mioda SDR2 Protag Swap AU#danganronpa#sdr2#super danganronpa 2#ibuki mioda#goodbye despair
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hi hello hi ik how it feels to be writer bored seeing as its my default state so i will attempt to cure ur writer bored!!!!
whats a small detail of your wip that you like a lot? what about a big one? does your wip play with symbolism? name meanings?
aaaaa thank you!! and name meanings I am hhsgshsgsvshsvs yes the names have meanings I am going to answer this out of order because oh bOY
so first of all instead of a last name, shining elves use a prefix on the first (and only!) name to indicate lineage (which can be traced through either biological parent, but if it applies smoothly, it goes by sex assigned at birth. trans people can choose whether to change their name to the other parent if they want, and you don't necessarily have to be trans to do that either, but that is generally how it goes. same sex couples able to conceive naturally generally settle naming their kids on a case by case basis.) but anyway. that prefix tends to be a noun and related to nature of some sort. for the first 20 years of a shining elf's life, they have no name, but instead a placeholder of sorts that just means child. then, when they turn 20, the Eldest and the people closest to them get together and figure out what their name will be based on their personality. It can be changed later too, if it turns out not to fit, because elves consider having a meaningful name to be incredibly important. so with that being said—
Regaya: I'm not sure what her lineage translates to, but it's probably something culturally important given that she's descended from royalty. so probably something to do with stars. her actual name, though, means agency. it wasn't always her name, and I'm not sure what her name was before she had it changed, but it was probably something docile or sweet. so she met with the Eldest and had it changed to what it is now
Immor: the first part of Immor's name means sunlight! the second part is most commonly translated to indomitable, but Immor would be more happy to describe it as meaning resilient, perseverant, steadfast, or a similar word because he feels that the common translation paints a more infallible picture of himself than he necessarily agrees with. and I do think he has conflict with his name at times—I think it gets exhausting, to identify with his ability to overcome when all be really wants is to exist peacefully with his family
Immerlias: the prefix is the same, and the suffix means joy! he's extremely happy with this, which you can probably guess is in-character, given that he was named after.... happiness. yeah. this will definitely cause some internal strife later in the narrative when he starts having to deconstruct some of his naive attitudes towards the world and overcome a dark time in his life, but eventually he will come to identify even more strongly with his name because of it
Aryaea: the prefix means bushfire, and honestly, I haven't really picked a steady meaning for the suffix. this one's harder bc she shares a name with one of Immor's old friends (now deceased) so I have to decide what they have in common that is so significant to both of their personalities, and honestly I think it's the escapist tendencies but I don't know how to spin that into a positive light with a concise meaning. adventurous, maybe?
and now to the other questions!! a really small detail I like in the very small amount that I've properly written is that in an early chapter, Immerlias is writing in his journal and spills ink on the word "happy," so he has to rewrite it. Forshadowing™️
as for a big detail, I've been working on worldbuilding out this group of nomadic people whose warriors are exclusively made up of werewolf monks who have sworn not to have any more children once they've contracted lycanthropy and joined the military/monastery, based on the belief that lycanthropy should only be a choice taken with informed consent and so to have children born naturally with the condition would go against that. the detailing here is shallow thus far but in my dnd games Aryaea typically ends up a werewolf eventually which has some really great symbolism for her has a character so I'm really excited and happy to have a reason to put it in the actual wip as well
and finally, yee, I do think my wip plays with symbolism, on levels both internal and mildly allegorical. the allegory is that capitalism bad (/hj) and then there's smaller scale stuff like using the sun as a symbol for Immerlias at times, and then there's mid tier stuff like Aryaea's lycanthropy that I think just goes really well with her specific brand of mentally-ill. I will happily ramble more about that last bit if you want me to but I have already typed So Much lmao and I already must thank you for helping cure my writey boredom :)
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Kingdom Hearts Re:Chain of Memories Reverse/Rebirth Recap: B12f: Hollow Bastion
Our story opens with Riku waking up in a pale-grey void.
A voice orders him to stay asleep.
Riku bolts awake, demanding to know who's there.
"You should remain asleep," the voice replies, "Here, between light and dark."
Riku at first questions what the voice means by that, but then realizes that the King is missing.
From his perspective, they had just closed the Door to Darkness, but after that..."
"You came drifting here by yourself," the voice explains, "You did not have the strength to overcome the darkness. Or... maybe you were close to it."
Riku sarcastically questions if he's some kind of demon, but the voice simply tells him to turn from the light and shut his eyes. To sleep safely and eternally in the darkness.
But if he doesn't want to do that...
A World Card appears, and the voice calls it a door to the truth.
"Take it, and your sleep ends, as you take the first step toward the truth," the voice explains as the card orbits Riku, "But know this: the truth will bring you pain. Will you still go?"
The card comes to a stop in front of Riku's face.
"There is no return to the security of sleep," the voice warns.
Riku contemplates his answer, and takes the Hollow Bastion World Card.
"This seemed like a boring place to take a nap anyway," he says.
"That was very well said, Riku."
A flash of light shines from the World Card, and Riku is transported to the Entrance Hall for Castle Oblivion's 12th Basement.
There's only one way forwards, the door to the Memory World.
Riku is entirely alone. He has no friends, he has no sleights. What I'm saying is that, after being the cooler, edgier rival for all of the first game, he's no a complete and utter loser compared to Sora.
His only Attack Card is Soul Eater. It reacts to high power, and is in fact stronger when Riku uses the darkness in battle.
This will become relevant later, but for now, let's check out the world card.
The first room takes on the form of Hollow Bastion's courtyard.
The voice explains that what Riku's seeing isn't real, it's the world of his memories.
The things you remember from your time at Maleficent's castle became a card, and that card made this world.
You've seen everything here before, haven't you?
Riku confirms that he has, but then questions if he's going to learn something or meet someone.
You would meet the people in your memories. Ordinarily.
"What does that mean?" Riku questions.
The voice doesn't answer, much to Riku's consternation, so he decides to press onward to find his own answers, hoping he'll run into the voice first.
Obtained Key to Beginnings!
Unlike Sora, Riku cannot assemble his own deck. Instead, he must rely on a pre-built deck determined by the World he's currently in.
To trade-off, all of his reloads are instant, and simply tapping the Attack button while the Reload Card is selected is enough to immediately get all of his cards back, assuming that they haven't been lost to sleights.
As Riku doesn't know any special sleights yet, and no way to recover those cards, stocking Attack Cards is a waste of time at this point.
His deck in Hollow Bastion consists entirely of Soul Eaters in the following order: 9, 8, 7, 8, 7, 6, 7, 6, 5, 6, 5, 4, 5, 4, 5, 4, 3. (In the GBA game, he had a Potion, a value of 9, which is functionally useless on account of already having Instant reloads, so it was removed from the PS2 remake.)
He also carries the Enemy Card of the Defender (a Heartless carrying a shield with a face). It grants the ability "Protect" reducing the damage taken from physical attacks by the enemy for 1 reload, but doing nothing against magic attacks.
Yes, the guy who was once immune to magic is now defenseless against magic.
Irony is a cruel yet hilarious mistress.
Fortunately, while Riku has no sleights (and doesn't learn any through level up) none of his enemies in this world have sleights either, so he's good!
Also, as he can't edit his deck, destructible items only drop HP Prizes, and he can't obtain Map Cards that would allow him to gain new cards or otherwise edit his deck.
This also means that regular enemies can ONLY drop Map Cards and EXP.
In short, this is a Challenge Mode.
The Room of Beginnings takes on the form of a room Sora never visited, with book cases lining the wall and a bed in the corner.
Riku notes that everything about Hollow Bastion is just as he remembers it, including this small room.
It must be nice being back in your old bedroom, the voice observes, Think of all the memories...
Riku states that he could do without these memories, as Maleficent is the one who gave him this room.
So she did. And you lived here, tempted by the darkness she offered.
You cast away your home, your friends, everything... But at least they gave you a nice room.
"STOP TALKING!" Riku snaps, before running out of the room.
Obtained Key to Guidance!
The Room of Guidance takes the form of the upper level of the Entrance Hall (which still has that random statue in the middle of the room for some reason even though it wasn't in KH1. Seriously how and why did Sora and Riku BOTH misremember that same odd detail?),
Riku observes that he's found nobody in the whole castle, nothing but Heartless.
He jumps down to the lower level.
"VOICE!" he shouts, "I know you're watching- so explain this! Where are the people from my memories?"
Do you want to see them?
"Of course I do!"
But you cast them aside.
"What?"
You dreamt of the outside world, and you passed through the door to darkness.
Behind you, you left family, friends, home - everything - all in pursuit of darkness.
"But I cast that aside too!"
And what do you have to show for it?
First your home, then the dark. Your heart only knows how to cast away.
It's empty - like that room.
Like your memories. That's why you don't meet anyone.
Your heart is hollow - except for the residual darkness.
Riku insists that he rejected the darkness.
Ha ha ha... Did you really, now?
Riku runs out of the room again.
Obtained Key to Truth!
The Room of Truth takes on the form of the chapel, where Riku comes face to face with Maleficent.
She notes that she knew Riku would return.
Riku is understandably shocked that Maleficent is alive, but she explains that she's just a figment of Riku's memory, admonishing him for not paying attention.
Riku laments that, of all the people to run into, he just had to run into her.
Maleficent explains that it's because Riku's heart is drenched in darkness. Because he belongs to the dark, he can only see the people who exist in that same darkness.
"Be grateful you have someone to keep you company," Maleficent states, "Your heart is empty. Were it not for the darkness it contains, you would be completely alone."
Riku admits that he'd prefer to be alone, and Malficent points out that he once turned to her to sate his hunger for darkness. She's here because he wants her here. Who else would grant him the darkness he so longs for?
"There was a time I did want you around. I surrendered my heart to the dark," Riku admits., "But never again. You and your darkness have nothing to offer."
He walks past Maleficent, and laments that all he did was lose and empty himself. He's done with that.
"If I'm stuck seeing people like you, people of the dark..." he turns to face Maleficent, "I'll take you out one by one."
Maleficent begins to walk away from Riku.
"Then you mustn't forget to destroy yourself last," she states, "For, like me, you are one of the dark."
Riku admits that he absolutely WILL kill himself later for being weakhearted enough to turn to the darkness in the first place. He hates that weakness, hates becoming his own enemy.
"And seeing people like you embrace the darkness just makes it worse!" he shouts, "Enough talk, Maleficent!"
Maleficent notes that Riku hates the darkness enough to fight it, mockingly bringing up the agony he must feel
"Then let me end your pain, Riku- end it forever..." Maleficent offers, "with the wondrous power of darkness!"
She then transforms into a dragon.
The Dragon Maleficent fight is more or less identical to her fight in Sora's story, just with less HP, and no Friend Cards.
The Gimmick Card is still present, and so Riku can still summon a platform.
Don't waste his cards with sleights, as all he'll do are three hit combos, and Maleficent is still incapable of using sleights.
When Riku kills Maleficent, he gets her Enemy Card permanently added to his deck.
You read that right, when Riku gets an Enemy Card from a boss, it becomes a permanent part of his deck.
Plus, Overdrive's drawback of "Slower Reloads" doesn't apply to Riku, because he doesn't have a Reload Counter, and his reloads are all instant.
However, there is one more drawback Riku has to work around.
Unlike Sora, he isn't automatically transported to the Conqueror's Respite after clearing the Room of Truth. He has to manually walk there, fighting through whatever Heartless impede him, until he finally reaches the Conquereror's Respite, the all important Save Point within, and is able to reach the exit hall.
Upon exiting Hollow Bastion, Riku's deck changes as well.
The only Enemy Cards he has access to are the ones dropped by bosses, and his Deck now goes in the following order (assume Soul Eater unless otherwise noted): 8, 7, 6, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 5, 4, 3, 0, 0, 9, 7, 4, 9, 7, 4, 9, 7, 4, 9, 9, 9, 8 (Hi Potion).
"Why do you shun the darkness?" the voice questions.
Riku notes that he knows the voice heard his chat with Maleficent.
"Darkness is your weapon," the voice states, "It is time you learned you must accept it."
Riku questions what the voice means.
"Stop resisting. Accept the darkness. You have no choice..." a dark portal opens, and a familiar face steps out.
"-if you are to serve me again!" Ansem declares (and notably not in his robed figure form).
Riku isn't really surprised.
"All you have been talking about is the darkness," he points out, "I can only assume you wanna pull me back in... so you can play puppet master."
"Clever boy," Ansem concedes, "I knew you'd be the one to most appropriately serve me. And now, surrender to me again-"
Riku refuses, summoning Soul Eater and charging Ansem, only to be easily deflected.
"Did you really think you could do me harm?" Ansem taunts, "A weakling like you couldn't even defeat Sora - and you had darkness on your side."
"Excuse me... For being weak..." Riku forces out as he tries to push himself off the floor.
"You are weak. You need darkness. Surrender," Ansem orders as he calmly approaches Riku, "Bow to darkness. Bow to me."
Riku, again, refuses.
Ansem insists that only the darkness can give Riku the strength he needs.
"You're wrong!" King Mickey objects as a ball of light descends from above.
Riku immediately recognizes the King, and Mickey's voice reminds Riku that he's not alone, and the light flies into Riku's chest.
"Listen close," the King begins, "The light will never give up on you! You'll always find it. Even in the deepest darkness!"
Riku rises to his feet, vowing to defeat the darkness, refusing to give in.
"You think that feeble little light can save you from the darkness that I command?" Ansem taunts.
Cue boss battle, in the GBA version at least.
In the remake, what follows is a tutorial battle where Ansem explains the new game mechanics.
Namely, Rapid Breaks (breaking a card instantly grants Riku more DP) and Duels.
Duels can be triggered whenever Riku and the enemy play cards that match values. What follows is a duel, where Riku must break a preset number of cards within a time limit to win.
If he wins the duel, he performs a Duel Sleight.
If he loses, the Enemy gets a free hit.
(Basically, low stakes variant of Doom that the player can control.)
Riku's Duel Sleights are as follows:
Impulse: Win a three card duel, and Riku will knock the target (and neighboring enemies) in the air and slam them into the ground, damaging multiple enemies.
Maelstrom: Win a five card duel, and Riku will perform a spinning attack that targets and damages one enemy.
Barrage: Win a seven card duel, and Riku will throw Soul Eater at the enemy.
After the battle, Ansem notes that Riku is insistent on not using the darkness, and presents four World Cards crafted from his memory so he'll see it for himself.
If he advances through the worlds, then he will see the truth:
"Chasing after light is not the way," Ansem claims, "It will not give you distance from the darkness. There is no running from the darkness."
Riku claims he's not running, and states that if, in the end, he hasn't given in to the darkness, then he'll be the winner of Ansem's sick game.
Ansem simply smirks and tosses the cards over to Riku, but then gives him one more parting gift.
With a wave of his hand, darkness begins to briefly emanate from Riku's chest.
Riku demands to know what Ansem just did.
"I simply tempered the darkness that yet remains in your heart," he explains.
Riku's offended that Ansem thinks he'll still rely on darkness, but Ansem explains that it'll be Riku's choice whether to use it or not.
"I'll be waiting, Riku..." Ansem states, "for you to sense it and yield to the darkness in your heart!"
Ansem vanishes into the dark.
Riku now has access to Dark Mode.
Whenever Riku breaks a card, the value of the card he broke will be substracted from the card he used to determine how much DP he'll earn.
Rapid Breaks add an additional 5 DP.
At 30 DP, the next Card Riku uses will transform him into Dark Mode, the Darkness wrapping around his body to form the same suite he wore in his battles against Sora in Hollow Bastion (he's still not immune to magic, fyi. That was a KH1-only thing).
Upon transforming, he gains access to the following sleights:
Dark Break: Riku jumps into the air and attacks the enemy from above up to six times if the player is good at quick time events. (Three Soul Eaters with a cumulative value of 5-15 while Riku is in Dark Mode.)
Dark Firaga: Casts blue Firaga that deals physical damage. (Three Soul Eaters with a cumulative value of 16-26 while Riku is in Dark Mode.)
Dark Aura: RIku repeatedly rushes the enemy with Soul Eater in hand, punctuated by stabbing the ground and releasing energy pillars that confuse the enemy. (Three Soul Eaters with a cumulative value of 27 while Riku is in Dark Mode.)
He also gains access to three new Duel Sleights:
Dark Impulse: Knocks several foes into the air and then slams them into the ground with more force than he would have otherwise after winning a three card duel in Dark Mode.
Dark Maelstrom: Riku performs a powerful spinning attack on a single enemy after winning a five card duel in Dark Mode.
Dark Barrage: Riku throws multiple Soul Eaters at a single enemy after winning a seven card duel.
Dark Mode, when activated, is also a reload, but doesn't restore Riku's HP. Every time Riku takes damage or has one of his cards broken, he loses DP. Run out, and he reverts to normal.
When leveling up, Riku can boost the following stats:
HP: his max HP.
AP: Attack Points, which determines the strength of his cards.
DP: Determines how many Dark Points he has upon activating Dark Mode. While he'll always need exactly 30 Dark Points to activate it, he WILL have whatever this DP is when he activates Dark Mode.
Upon ascending the stairs, another cutscene plays, showing a short, blue-haired man in a black coat, his bangs covering one of his eyes.
A more muscular Organization member with orange hair enters the room through a dark portal, and the first man sarcastically asks Lexaeus if he's going to say hello.
Vexen enters next, and demands that Zexion (the first Organization member) give an explanation as to why he called them there.
Zexion sarcastically greets Vexen, and laments the lack of camraderie between Organization members lately.
"You're only number 6!" Vexen points out, "How dare you-"
"Let it go, Vexen," Lexaeus interrupts, before asking Zexion what he detected.
"Visitors," Zexion answered. He picked up two scents(EN)/auras(JP) in the castle's lowest basement.
"One of them was Maleficent-"
"Don't be absurd," Vexen interrupts, "The witch is gone. She cannot return from the realm of darkness of her own volition."
"If you would let me finish," Zexion replies, "The scent(EN)/aura(JP) belonged not to the real Maleficent but to a very convincing double. But I truly cannot say much beyond that since the double is no more. Our other visitor saw to that."
Lexaeus asks who it was.
Zexion admits that he's not sure, but the scent/aura was very similar to "the Superior".
Vexen is able to deduce that it wasn't exaclty the same, adn admits that his curiousity has been piqued.
Zexion questions what to do now, and Lexaeus suggest that they wait and observe.
-
Getting pretty dark here my dudes
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i’ve been busy and it’s been awhile and i haven’t popped in for a hot minute BUT i just had a sudden thought about iwaizumi (˶˃ᆺ˂˶)
you’re in the point of your relationship where you both know your feelings for each other but haven’t made it official yet. he’s studying overseas while you’re in your home country, both of you busy pursuing your own dreams. the difference in timezones has been particularly challenging—the missing presence, the frequent missed calls, the late replies, and, most especially, the intense longing. however, as you have fallen asleep while waiting for him, tired beyond words from the intense day you’ve had, he’s over there sitting at his desk at his apartment after class, looking at his phone contemplating whether he should call you still—he knows it’s late, and he knows you deserve a restful sleep, but he can’t shake off that feeling of longing, the sound of your voice, the shine in your eyes, and even the softness of your lips… he shouldn’t, he really shouldn’t, but he finds himself pressing the dial button anyway—sleep and timezones be damned (genuine apologies from hajime to you), he misses you so much he can’t help but be overcome with selfishness. and it’s okay, it’s worth it he thinks, especially with the way you groggily greet him with that sweet smile of yours, your eyes gleaming with warmth albeit the darkness of the room. he sees it, he feels it through the small screen. “sorry, did i wake you?” he knows he did, but he really can’t help it. “it’s alright, i was waiting for you to call, anyway” you tell him smiling sleepily. and god he feels it, making his heart beat a steadily fast pace causing him to feel warm all over. he hopes you feel it too because after you both bid your sleep well and good night, his heart whispers those three words he’s been wanting to say, but he’d wait, oh he would wait, just a little longer… just until before the coming break because he finds himself booking a flight, the fastest one to get to you. he does so spontaneously because he’s selfish, just to see you, to hear you, and to maybe, no, absolutely show you just what he feels seeing you smile on that call, but this time, he hopes to accompany it with a kiss and those three words his heart is dying for you to hear…
OMG didn’t expect it to be long but!!!JDHDIDJS also honestly i originally am not a hajime truther (,,>ࡇ<,,) but i have seen the light through you and i have been enlightened ( ◡̀_◡́)ᕤ (lmao) okay, i am going back to fighting irl battles now! i hope you have a wonderful day ahead of you (*ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)ꕤ*.ﾟ(i’ve been brewing (heh) some matcha experiments lately and would share some thoughts next time i drop by ໒( ˵ •̀ ᴗ •́˵) until then, teehee)
-matcha nonie<3
matcha nonie hello!!! so lovely of you to drop by 🥺 i hope you’ve been getting lots of rest despite you being busy!! 🥹 i am looking forward to all your matcha experiments!!!! let me know what they are when you have the time 🥺🥺 lately i’ve been trying matcha + coffee (on my tired days especially akxnsj) and it definitely gives me a boost!!!
and w a hajime thought omg… 🥹 an ldr hajime thought too 🥹🥹🥹 matcha nonie. if i tell u. i think abt this all the time 😭😭😭 it’s one of my fave things to include in a slowburn hajime love story 😭😭 i think it’s a canon event ngl the yearning and the pining and the feelings there without saying anything is so him 😭
AND WHAT A COMPLIMENT to make u see the light 😭😭😭 i am so flattered n so touched… i think. he is such a special and specific brand of boyfriend i can’t even fully explain it 🥹🥹🥹 he’s just… him, y’know?
i also. may have written smth similar to what u just said 🥹 it’s in a privated fic here on tumblr, under my hajime series ‘(keep me) steady, hold me gently’ (tho i think it’s still up on my ao3!!) it’s called ‘by your name only’ 🥹 i’ve privated it bc i plan to redo the entire series 🥹 my writing has changed a bit since writing it (which is also why i wanna rewrite it, apart from formatting reasons).
BUT SINCE YOU JUST REMINDED ME OF IT WITH THIS LIL HAJIME THOUGHT OF YOURS—a snippet from one of my hajime fics under the cut!
When Iwaizumi takes up Sports Science in California, you stay behind and complete your degree in Japan. The time difference sucks; just as he starts his day, you’re ending yours. Still, you make an effort to talk within the window of hours you’re able to.
At 1:03 a.m., you are cozied up on your bed, night light casting a soft glow onto your tired eyes. You yawn, squinting at your phone while waiting for a familiar face to pop up on screen. A few minutes pass, and it vibrates, the picture you took of Iwaizumi that summer after high school on display.
You swipe your screen to find bright light streaking through the lens of Iwaizumi’s camera, obscuring your vision of him.
“Hold on,” he murmurs, before the view turns to black. Random blobs and shapes move around and you suspect that he’s probably wiping the lens while moving to a place with shade. “Sorry, just walking to campus right now.”
You wait patiently.
Soon enough, you are faced with a clearer visual of Iwaizumi, his spiky hair now shaped into a semi-crew cut—olive green eyes giving off the same stare you know can only belong to him. He doesn’t look much different from the photo assigned to him on your phone, but he doesn’t look the same either. The fact that you notice these changes means that time has passed, and you’re reminded that this is the Iwaizumi you no longer have—the Hajime you could have had.
“Hey,” he greets, sending you a grin. A few beats and recognition flashes through his face as he notices that you’re all tucked in bed, ready to sleep. “Shit, did I wake you?”
You laugh and shake your head, mushing your cheek against your pillow, “No, it’s okay,” you snuggle up to your duvet, “was waiting for your call anyway.” you readjust your phone and place both hands under your cheek, “You rushing to class today?”
“Not really.” he answers, looking up from the screen, presumably to cross a road. “First period canceled, so I’m heading to the gym for a bit. How ‘bout you?”
“Well,” a playful glint sparks in your eyes, “not rushing to class, no. Not going to the gym, either. Not in this outfit, I think.” you smile, suppressing a laugh. Iwaizumi rolls his eyes, but you can see traces of a smirk gracing his lips.
Since going to America, Iwaizumi has gone through a few changes: his confidence, his humor, and his temperament—all of which have gotten better. He’s a lot more relaxed now than he used to be, joking around and going along with your jokes every now and then. But underneath all these improvements, he retains the same qualities that make him the Iwaizumi you know (and love).
“Ha. ha. Funny.” he responds sarcastically.
A twinge pinches at your heart, and you think, God, this banter, it hurts. This is the soft spot you know he holds for you. You’re brought back to the same nastiest look he’d given you when you wrote the most horrible puns on Aoba Johsai banners during matches.
“I meant, how ‘bout you, you aren’t rushing to class tomorrow? Actually–” the video moves around and you catch a glimpse of him tapping his smart watch, a familiar black bracelet on his other wrist, “—shouldn’t you be asleep?” When he returns to the screen, worry lodges through his furrowed brows, a small pout forming on his face. You want so badly to be there to wipe it off.
“It’s fine. You called, so.” you say softly, gently, leaving room for your admission to ring louder. You know he understands because he’s done the same.
“Well,” he copies you, “I don’t want to keep you up. Sleep’s really important, you know.”
You hum in acknowledgment, “Okay,” disappointment poorly hidden in your tone.
But he knows, he always does. “Call me when you’re free later, I’ll pick up. We can catch up then.”
You smile and nod. A yawn escapes you, eyes slowly drifting shut. “Good morning, Haji.” you mumble.
He freezes.
He wouldn’t have heard it if not for his earphones (thank god he had them). It’s the first time you’ve ever called him Haji. Heat rises from the back of his neck, to the tips of his ears, down again to the expanse of his cheeks. The familiar thump sounds loudly in his ears.
“‘Night,” he responds, whispering your name before ending the call.
It takes him a while before he continues to walk towards the gym; his heart is pounding too hard and too loudly for him to focus on where to go. All that replays in his mind is the sound of you saying Haji, softly, tenderly—the way you encase the syllables of his name in comfort that feels like it belongs to your lips.
Haji.
He wonders if you meant to call him that.
#nonie.matcha#ask#rep#you are so sweet to drop by like this matcha nonie!! I appreciate it v much 🥹#how cute!!! you are now turning into a matcha expert 😌😌#hajime
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we shall all be healed | odile | mm trial 4 | re: new beginnings
What was the purpose of Odile, the black swan?
In all of her stories, she has no defined existence of her own; a character meant solely to be Odette’s doppelganger, to take from her what mattered most for the sake of her father. Even when she wants something, it is always the love of another, something to validate herself among all the others. Rothbart takes her feathers and sharpens her into a tool. And to Siegfried, she could never be anything but that white swan’s shadow, an imitation of his real love. When she dies, it is unceremonious, all at once, or it is in sacrifice, her life for someone else’s happy story. The page has turned. The book has closed. There is no other way that this story goes.
It’s already been told, but this is not the end.
There’s nothing glamorous left about Inigo. Raw, plucked, pulled out every light from his stage. Failure doesn’t begin to describe all of what he fell short on, with more years of his life wasted than were ever warmly enjoyed. Enough time tied to the ground will convince any prisoner that they never looked at the sky anyways. Each old mark left on his skin was a point of pride, another piece of himself lost along the way. To have survived this, to have made it past that. To surmount, to challenge, to overcome, triumph after triumph on the mountaintop, not yet realizing the path was underground from the start. A younger Inigo would see themselves in pieces and throw their outstretched hand to the side, stomp on it. I would never become you, they would say, because I am better than that.
Now they have no work to be proud of and no body to call their own, after years and years of putting themselves into every inch of it, ego found in right angles and right words and right turns. For once out of material, out of ways to retaliate, to make some laughable spot out of all this darkness. All of the lovable bits about them stained with blood and regrets and debts left unpaid, as high as rising water and churned like there’s a beast underneath the waves. Encircling the present moment like a leviathan, a poison flower in a vast plain. Inherently, something wrong and rotten to them, something that caused them to turn out this way.
Even so, Inigo looks at himself and feels nothing but pride. Not in spite of, but because. Nothing Tsuki could do or say could touch them now. To think they’d been had by another sad megalomaniac, grasping at whatever they could do drag everything down, perhaps there’s some irritation about lessons thrice learned, but! They are dancing on a different stage. There’s no use in comparison between two people, one who follows their disgust, and one who has learned to let in love.
No more kingdoms left to fight. No more wars left to wage. Time will prove who the victor of Dish to the Death was. Inigo feels that push of Alfie’s hand in theirs and takes it, a squeeze to try and aid the ache. Soft smiles, no warmth to be felt in their death senses, but the illusion of it just from what can be remembered. Even if now, they faded away, everything will be alright.
He has nothing left about Tsuki or Araceli to say. Leftovers from old chapters. Rather, Inigo speaks, and says:
[♫♫♫]
“Hey, Alfie? Where do you wanna go first? Spain? Greece? Whatever place over there has Frankfurt? Come on, we gotta start planning early if we’re going to backpack the whole way.”
The swan without any feathers chooses to fly anyways. Up to where the next leg of their tale begins, to where the night sky has its stars shine and never fade. To, at last, take their own dance upon the lake.
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Devil may fall, chapter 1: The Fall.
"The Angel that presided o'er my birth
Said, "Little creature, form'd of Joy and Mirth,
"Go love without the help of any Thing on Earth…"
People thought mountains were… Spiritual, metaphorical, challenging, but most of the time humans never saw mountains as much else. I knew this to be different, a mountain represented something primal in all of us, demon or human, the challenge to overcome, a sublime to embrace. And that's why I came here, I thought to myself as I looked up at the ravenous climb. Also my body grew tired, so a cave would do well to hide in.
I've been moving for so long, four years of fighting and living without aid, even at my young age… My mercenary skills are beyond all of mankind, I am able to lift hundreds of tons, run at speeds faster than any sports car, and no weak human weaponry could even think to penetrate my skin, even if it could, my healing factor would take right care of it.
"Hmph, I wonder if Dante is still the same as he once was, assuming the annoying twit still lives. Probably being festered and living like a parasite, the weak fool he is." I said to nobody as I trekked across the treacherous terrain, Mt. Ebott the villagers called it. I wouldn't think Dante strong enough to survive that night, but my little brother has surprised me before, so I hoped.
With my enhanced reflexes and dexterity, the climb was hardly the challenge the villagers seemed to think it was, it wasn't even particularly cold. Still, even with my demonic heritage which I know makes me effectively immortal, something about this place puts me off… Eventually, I saw an entrance to a cave, finally coming to the end of the beaten path, now the real challenge begins, I hope at least, foolish as it may be.
It was dark, obviously. I tried to convince myself that I wasn't afraid, and that my use of my summoned swords to light the cavern was purely for practical reasons, and yet… Foolishly, I can still see the image of a smiling demon in the shadow of my mind, each time I close my eyes…
It is no issue.
Finally, I could see light shine in from beyond, an opening at the end of the tunnel, I dismissed my summoned swords and gripped tightly to my blade, Yamato. It and the scabbard that held it were my choice of weapon, they comforted me, not that I would admit that to anyone.
Reaching the opening, I instantly noticed how large the cavern truly was, vines and foliage scattered across the entrance, only to suddenly end at a huge gaping pit at the center of it all, instantly entrancing me. Enticing me with a call to adventure, I smirked at the challenge and rocketed into the air, performing a small twirl before falling down deep below the surface.
As I descended, my heart skipped a beat...
My knees buckled as I landed in a bed of flowers with a soft thud, kicking up petals and golden aroma, the only light of the room coming from whence I came, I opened my eyes and absorbed the surroundings, this cave was no different. I looked around for a second or two, adjusting to the darkness once again before shaking my head and continuing my trek, and then something… odd happened.
Without warning, a girl in a striped green and yellow shirt appeared before me, her body and her eyes shut, this mattered not to me however, I placed my blade against her throat in the blink of an eye. But still… She didn't come to life, I glared hard with my piercing blue eyes and noticed a few things about her, she seemed to be my age, if a little older. She had shoulder length chestnut hair and an innocent expression with rosey cheeks to boot, but one would learn not to trust an innocent expression, not in my line of work anyways.
"You, identify yourself, I won't be playing any games, so don't waste my time." My voice was scratchy and nasally, I was on the cusp of puberty so it was normal, but I wish I could've spoken with more authority.
And yet… She still didn't open her eyes, even with a blade next to her throat. It was at that moment I realized that she was actually taller than me, even with her legs levitating from the ground by a few inches, I hardly came up to her chin. Growling, I scoffed at this revelation, Yamato was similarly taller than I and yet I was master to it.
I tightened my grip on Yamato as I saw her eyes twitch slightly, her body coming to life. Slowly but surely her eyes opened, they were the deepest shade of crimson, as if blood solidified into two perfect rubies. A small tinge of satisfaction filled my head as I watched her eyes suddenly snap open, her mouth releasing a scream.
"Get that thing away from me, you filthy human!" Ignoring her crass language, I raised a brow at her terrified expression.
"You are a human too, fool." I replied nonchalantly, my bemusement at a high.
She backed away from me quickly, floating like a ghost would. "So what? I'm not pointing swords at anyone am I? Is that the first thing you pathetic creatures do every time you see someone different than you?" I found myself amused, her face was burning fed and obviously she wasn't very happy with the situation, it brought me delight.
"Foolish girl, in this world it's kill or be killed, until I discerned how much of a coward you were I had to be in control, now I know, and now you can begone from my presence." I finished, walking towards her and the exit in the wall. I could tell she was angered but before she said anything, there was a sudden recollection in her eyes, but I simply moved her aside like she weighed nothing, which she likely did as a ghost, but a ghost one could touch? I wasn't sure how to react to that.
It wasn't long before she was following me.
"Hey! Are you not going to tell me what's going on? Do not ignore me!" I could feel her tiny
smooth hands try to stop me from moving, although she was not able to enact any meaningful force on me, it didn't stop her from trying.
I slapped her hands off my shoulders, "Enough of your rambling, I have to traverse this crypt and find its secrets, I need power, and if this place has any to offer..." Truthfully, I could feel a familiar temporal presence, and it called me to explore.
Furrowing her eyebrows, the girl crossed her arms and began to hover around me. Taking on a questioning gaze, she finally stopped talking. Even if she continued to follow me in her astral form, I could finally continue my train of thought.
'This place… It reeks with demonic energy and presence.' My thoughts could only guide my next actions, I continued down the path. A strange ghost girl was one thing, I'd seen many ghosts and demons in my travels as a merc, it was nothing new, even if her physics were… confusing.
But what I saw next was definitely new, a cross between bizarre and creepy awaited me, at the center of the room I had entered… Was an animated, smiling, golden flower.
"What in the blazes?" I said, scrunching my eyes a bit. My unwanted ghost companion was doing the same, her rosy cheeks puffing up.
"Howdy!" I took a step back, audibly and visibly disgusted.
"It speaks!" I lamented, noticing the slight twitch of the Flower's smile.
"This 'it' has a name y'know, that name being Flowey the flower! Pleasure to meetcha'!" It was animated unnaturally, a feigned friendly disposition marred its face, one I'd grown used to seeing over the years.
I gave a deadpan, "Is that a joke? Of all names you could choose, you choose Flowey, hah, you should be a comedian, you foolish little weed." I smirked suddenly before chuckling softly at the restrained angered expression the flower was trying to hold back.
"Now you liste-" Before the flower could even finish his tirade, I held my blade an inch from its face, an aura blazing around me and lighting my cruel frown with a soft blue tinge. I gained a cruel satisfaction seeing the raw terror etched onto its face, I saw it's eyes flicker to something off in the distance behind me, and with a choked gasp, it retreated back into the soil below. The Yamato is glimmering.
Frowning still, "What a foolish little flower, to challenge me, a devil." Faster than the girl could see, I sheathed my blade, returning to my neutral stance. She had a worried look in her eyes as she began to connect the dots. I am a warrior who had no qualms challenging anyone, but calling myself a devil would've confused anyone.
"W-wait! Just wait one moment!" I sighed and turned back to my unwanted compatriot, her face flushed red as her eyes, and she sighed in turn.
"What is it foolish girl, come to nag me more?"
"No, I apologize about that, I just… I just woke up after being dead, can't you see how that would make someone rather anxious? Your sword wasn't helping either." She looked away from me, tears pooling at the edge of her eyes. If she thought I was going to grant her pity, she was sorely mistaken.
"Perhaps, but that doesn't explain why you're following me." I said without a hint of care, I was bored if anything.
Rubbing her eyes, the girl looked at me with her wide eyes pleading, and for an imperceptible microsecond I felt my defenses weaken. "Listen, I think we started off on the wrong foot." She glided ahead of me, blocking my path once again. Now that she was fully in my vision, I could properly discern what she looked like. Definitely a year or two older than me, taller, and on the cusp of puberty as well… She wore a green and yellow turtleneck that in all honesty, was too baggy for her, or perhaps it was intended to stave off the cold? Irrelevant to me but I analyzed anyways, she also wore black shorts that went down to her knees. She was very nonthreatening, but her eyes served some interest, a deep red opposed to my bright blue.
The female held out her small hand to me, smiling widely from ear to ear, her pearly whites casting a ray of light over her and her well fashioned clothing, a sharp contrast to my shadowed garb, rags and cloaks to protect me from the elements and nothing more.
"I think my soul is attached to you spiritually, so can we be…" she seemed to struggle with this part, "Friends perhaps?"
"..." I was silent for a moment longer, secretly relishing the flush that grew on her face as I continued to stare at her without a single word.
"No."
…
"Well, why not?" She had a genuinely confused look on her face.
I crossed my arms suddenly, "Do you think me stupid? I can sense that hatred behind your eyes, you're no innocent little girl… Get out of my way." The girl choked a sob back suddenly, tears drawing to her eyes like a flood of rain as she fell to her knees. I was taken aback by her sniffles, she was clearly incredibly distressed.
She rubbed her eyes, "I just wanted to be your friend, why be so cruel?" I paused for a moment, unaware of how to stop her from crying, and even less aware of why I cared about such a hate filled creature.
My eyes looked around for someone, anyone to stop her silent sobs from continuing. But sadly it would not be, I was on my own. But maybe that made the ordeal a bit easier as well.
"Stop crying, it's unbecoming, I don't tolerate weakness in my presence." I felt satisfied internally at my handling of her wails, but for some reason she continued to cry as if my lament amounted to nothing.
"You idiot, the last time I cried was when…" Her tears began to subside, and she suddenly grew quiet, face darkening. I curled a brow before continuing on, leaving the female to her devices.
No point in consoling her, how could I?
I am only good for one thing.
...
The green garbed girl retracted her tears as she watched the odd boy leave, "Damnit, that usually worked quite well on Azzie…" It wasn't often she had to force herself to cry, the last time was so long ago…
But her eyes lit with determination, "I can't let him kill anyone, he's a human… just like the rest, he just wants to kill and maim everyone I ever knew… If they are even around still…" so she began to float after him, a determined expression on her face.
'We failed… Damnit Asriel you spineless… Damnit.'
...
Entering through the path ahead, the first sight I was greeted with was resounding purple, ancient architecture covered in moss and vines, as if aged. I caressed a wall, rubbing the soot of the stone into my fingers as I felt the texture, it was unlike any stone I'd ever felt. But by far the most confusing thing that was at the center of the room, is the glowing… star? It burned brightly and yet was self contained, I wondered…
My hands touched the star, and instantly I felt its warmth enter me, a source of strength and power I'd never felt before, it revitalized me in ways my regeneration factor could never, my face warped into a grin. "Is this the source of power I was sensing before? Excellent, I wonder if I could…" I placed my hand on the star once more, using my own demonic spirit to pull it. I felt its raw energies enter my body and absorb into my bloodstream, empowering my life force and filling my hunger, and to my surprise… My resolve as well.
"Are you really a demon?" The girl again, she'd snapped me out of my trance, maybe now that I was in a better place I could properly deal with her.
"No, I am a step above, I am a devil, listen girl, where do you think the source of my irresistible strength arrived from? Certainly not from human blood." She snorted at my use of irresistible, clutching her stomach as she began to chuckle as if I had said something really funny.
"You are quite humorous, a devil who looks like a human? Don't make me laugh, you're just trying to fit in before you cut everyone down aren't you?" I curled a brow, readjusting my silver hair and scoffing, what had she meant by that?
"I am a devil, half at least, the other half is human. I won't be explaining to the likes of you, but that's the truth. Now, tell me what you mean by fitting in? Are you implying this is a world of demons?" I felt my gaze darken and narrow to accentuate my last question, it was a joy to watch an immaterial ghost squirm under my gaze.
"W-well, yeah, this is the underground, almost exclusively demons live here, but the well meaning kind!" She added on quickly, I began to laugh for real, sticking the butt of my scabbard into the ground for support.
"The good kind? That might be the most audacious drivel I've heard in many years, don't jape with me, girl."
"You talk like a pedant." My eyes twitched.
"I talk proper, maybe you should try it sometimes, ghost." I spat the last part out, clearly not amused.
She scowled at me, her face blew up red as her eyes. "I have a name you know-"
"Irrelevant to me, cease your drivel, I'm continuing on." I didn't even look back, I cared little for what she had to say. But as I made my way up the stairs, I was revitalized, but I still wasn't ready for who I was about to run into.
I sensed its presence long before It did mine, unsheathing my blade before the creature could attack. "Prepare to die, demon!" The creature yelped and took a few steps back, obviously surprised.
"Stop! Don't touch her please! DONT kill!" I heard the cries of the girl from behind me, my mind hardly registered them-
"She's my mother!" I stopped at that point, my blade began to shake in my hands. Did that mean, she was a half demon as well?
"Oh my, what a sharp blade you have there my child!" The womanly voice confused me, but as I paid more attention to the initially demon-like silhouette I quickly realized she was not your average grotesque monster, she was dressed in a rather eloquent garb, purple and bearing a rune… This demon seemed to have no Ill will towards me… but I had learned long ago not to trust such intentions.
"Demon, why have you approached me? Can't you feel my raw demonic presence, surely you don't think you can defeat me one on one?" The demonic presence I felt from her was high for a demon, but I could take her if her current energies were truthful.
The goat demon didn't seem much like a demon right now as she clasped her hands and looked at me gently, "I mean you no harm my child, it's been a long time since I've seen a new human in the underground, much less a warrior oh goodness me." I couldn't sense any deception from her, nor could I sense evil intent.
The demon was tall, incredibly tall. Two small horns jutting out of her fuzzy cranium, she bore a resemblance to religious depictions of a goat. But was far more innocent, bearing no malign design.
I tilted my head, "Hm… I am no human, but this misunderstanding can be forgiven, simply move from my path." If this really was the girl's mother… I may have killed before, but killing a mother was below me.
With a casual ease, I resheathed my blade and moved the demon to the side, her yelps signified how shocked she was at my strength, as she was easily a head and then some taller. But before I could trudge past her, she tried to place a hand on my shoulder; "Wait a minute my child, I can-" I released a dark presence from my spirit, stopping her and the ghostly spectre in place with my aura.
"Let go of me, I am no child, clearly you are incapable of sensing energies, demon." She was able to feel it now, her face took on a grim expression as I turned and walked forth.
...
I was met by a long hallway, spikes blocking my path, I merely leapt over them with my enhanced abilities. The path led me to another room, one with an odd looking dummy, hardly a demon. I ignored it and turned left, entering another room filled with spikes. I smiled a little.
"This place is… peculiar…"
My legs exploded into motion as I leapt into the air and landed adjacent to the wall, my soles
leaving imprints before I dissipated from sight and reappeared in a blur of motion at the other side, a trick as I called it. It allowed me to move instantaneously across a limited distance, regardless of what was between me and my destination.
Regardless, I continued on.
As I entered the next area, I realized it was an incredibly long corridor; I groaned. "Whoever designed this place… Will know my wrath." I felt a familiar presence appear to the left, the girl was floating next to me with her elbow propping her body up, as if she was laying down.
"You know, you really hurt her feelings. Mother is a sweet woman, she didn't deserve that."
"Is that so? Well I'm afraid that should we cross paths again, I'll offer her the same courtesy as I did last time." She flicked my shoulder in response, attempting to be 'playful' as Dante would call it.
"Don't do that again."
"Or what? You can't kill me, I'm already a ghost." I seethed, gyrating my teeth.
"Someone must've come to the same conclusion I have then…" I muttered under my breath, pinching my nose.
"What? You say something?" She slurred intentionally, somehow even more annoyingly.
"Mind your own business." She didn't, levitating down near my scabbard, she began to inspect it as if she's never seen a sword before.
"Strange sword, where'd you get it?" Ahh so she has, just not a Japanese styled katana.
I glared down at her, "A story not suited for children, so remove yourself from my presence." I hmphed, seeing the end in sight. I promptly sped up and left her behind.
She saw it as well and sped up to block my path before I could leave, "Wait a moment, can you promise me one thing, I'll do whatever you ask if you do, but I can't let you kill anyone here, they've done nothing wrong." She pleaded with me, looking directly at me with her huge eyes.
"I can't promise such things, in self defense I may have to kill, these are the ways of the world, it's kill or be killed." She flinched at the words once again, almost as if they meant something to her.
"I… I understand, but if you are truly as strong as you seem to think, then I doubt you'll find a need for that here… The underground is filled with demons, but Mundus has no control here, they are a peaceful clan-" My eyes shot to attention suddenly, she knew about Mundus.
"Mundus? Girl what would you know about Mundus? This place truly has no connection to him!?" I grabbed her shoulders, despite her being incorporeal.
She slipped away from me with a scathing glare, "Hands off ruffian, I'll tell you but don't do anything stupid." I curled a brow and eagerly awaited what she was going to say. We had stopped right before the exit.
She sighed before staring ahead of me, "The demons of the underground were here after the final war of demons and Sparda, trapped underground by the humans and their stupid magic barrier long ago, a barrier so strong that no demon could crack it. Nobody could leave, only enter. The demons of the underground are not at all similar to the demons who serve Mundus, they are way less violent and way weaker, and they tried to live in peace with humanity unlike Mundus…" I could tell she abridged it and had more to let on, perhaps I should've treated her less harshly… Dammit.
"Is that it?" I pushed, she wagged her finger at me stifling my greed.
"Don't get greedy, you get what you get, maybe you should've been more pleasant, perhaps?" I growled, cursing my impudence, this girl could be a guide to me and show me the secrets of this demonic underground I realized.
I calmed my expression, "I apologize for my earlier behavior, it was uncouth of me." I hoped that would be good enough for her, as I really wasn't one to apologize.
She made a thoughtful gesture, "Mhm, not quite, little man." My eyebrow twitched, she'd finally noticed our height difference.
She smiled at me, "But you can make it up to me if you don't kill anyone, I'll share all I know." I grumbled, I didn't enjoy the prospect of being bullied into a pact.
"You browbeating…" I reigned in on my muttering, "Very well then, I will stave off violence for the time being, but I will not dither to defend myself. Let us continue." If I was anything, It was rational. She would most likely be correct in her judgements about the strength of these demons, the strongest so far being that Goat demon from before, and she was hardly stronger than the average higher tier demon on the surface.
The odd girl clasped her hands with a squeal of joy, the dastardly sound harming my ears. "Cease that at once girl." I growled out, only for her to giggle at my annoyance, she loved tormenting people is all I could conclude.
"You're too easy to annoy, and well… since you happen to be stuck with me, you'd better prepare for it." I rubbed my face in response, companions almost always slowed me down as few as I've had. But I reminded myself why I even bothered, finally coming through the exit.
To my left was an odd creature that resembled a frog, to my right, another path downwards. Behind the creature was a door to a small room, "That's a Froggit by the way, little guys couldn't hurt a fly… Or, well that's all they could hurt." Her attempts at humor did little to change my mood as I turned to enter the room. She grumbled before brightening her mood artificially.
The girl floated in front of me, "Howdy, my name's Chara, mind introducing yourself? Or be a downer, pick hurriedly." Why was her way of speaking so familiar?
"Your name is Chara? Like character? Interesting, my name however is not here nor there." That is all I said as we entered the room, there was a bowl atop a pedestal.
She hmphed, "I see, false Shakespeare. You speak too much like an adult, how old are you?"
"None of your concern."
"I'm 13, the last I checked…" My eyes twitched imperceptibly, I prayed to whatever higher powers there were that she didn't notice.
She did.
"Pfft, you're younger than me? I guess that makes some sense, since you're shorter, hehe." My face shadowed incredibly, and I picked up my pace towards the bowl.
"Only hardly…" I muttered as I looked down at the contents of the bowl, my eyes widening slightly as I realized it was candy.
"Take one please!" I read out loud, nodding. I dipped my hand in the bowl and grabbed a single piece before turning on a dime and heading back outside, much to the shock of the ghostly girl following me.
If there was one thing I wasn't, it was greedy for material possession.
The ruins as Chara had called them, were aptly named, the floor and walls had been cracked and decayed exponentially, no matter to me as I had navigated far worse, yet there seemed to be a lingering mystery here… What exactly happened to this world?
"Y'know, I thought little kids were supposed to be with their parents…"
"Interesting hypothesis, girl."
"I see you didn't realize I was talking about you, are you alright in the head?"
Before I could respond, I noticed a large see through object laying down in the way of my path, and it was emitting… strange noises. I swiftly reached for it, but found my hands going through instead, and slowly the ghost came to life.
"Oh… hey there… sorry for being in your way…" for some reason upon saying this, the ghost remained in my way, he seemed depressed, not that I cared.
"Oooh a ghost like me, hey friend, can you see me?" The weird girl approached the weird ghost, its inexpressible face changing slightly.
"Oh… Yes I can see you… Are you two friends?" Tears began to build up around his eyes, the ghost seemed saddened.
"Yes, best friends even! My name is Chara, what's yours?" She seemed a lot more lively when talking to another ghost it seemed, the double handed insults gone from her vocabulary.
'Wait what did she say we were?'
"Oh that's nice… my name is Napstablook, don't worry about remembering it." He was self deprecating as well, I scoffed audibly drawing the ire of my companion.
"Ghost, why cry?" I asked simply, intrigued why an offshoot of demon would be even capable of such a thing.
He looked towards me, tears doubling "Oh… I'm sorry…" It was likely a defense mechanism, if anything.
"Don't apologize, you're a demon aren't you? A ghost? Have some pride, there is no need for tears." My tone was perfectly objective, no scathing words nor accommodating pleasantries.
"I guess… I just can't help it… oh I've wasted your guys time haven't I?" He began to tear up again, much to Chara's chagrin.
"Do not listen to him, it's quite alright to cry my ghostly friend, downer over there just doesn't know how." She glared at me, trying to comfort the ghost while it teared up silently.
"Peh, think nothing of my words if you so wish, I just ask that you move from our path so I can continue my travels." I requested to which the ghost replied instantly.
"I suppose I can do that… Sorry…"
The ghost moved to the side so I could pass, I gave it a nod before continuing and leaving the two ghosts to their own devices.
...
"I despise that guy, I honestly do. But I'm stuck with him, me, stuck with a damned human hybrid… thing! I hate it." Chara vented to her newfound friend, the two laying down on the red bed of petals. She knew that there was a range limit for their connection, as obscure as it was, any second she'd reform next to him.
Her new friend spoke softly, "Don't hate him… he probably doesn't have very many friends either… I understand him that way… And he isn't wholly human I don't think… But I'm just theorizing…" He was afraid that he'd come off as a know it all.
"Don't worry now Napstablook, I'll be your friend, even if I have a hard time with that uncouth half human… Maybe you're right, but humans aren't quick to change." Her mind could remember the scathing remarks from so long ago…
"You're a former human… And you seem to dislike them more than most monsters… You are an interesting ghost…"
"Thank you! You too."
...
I chowed down on a donut as I walked through the halls, traversing traps and the like with little difficulty. Thankfully with the gold I had been allowed from my investigation and various encounters with the locals, I was able to afford this confection… it was passable.
My mere presence caused most creatures to wane and evade my path, and the ones who did try to confront me could hardly levy an attack before being scared to their bones. And even despite the many stars to absorb, I was unable to resist the temptation of a sugary food.
"How's that donut hm? Hopefully sweet enough to make your frown turn upside down, but I don't think that's possible for you, mystery boy." I learned to ignore her ceaseless ramblings, as nothing she said to me was of any value as of yet, even though I'd stayed my blade.
Before long, I'd finally reached the end of the road, a tree standing high and tall above me as I came closer. Behind it was a house, was it abandoned?
"Ah, I remember this place." Chara spoke softer than I'd ever heard, she was definitely a resident of this underground world, even despite me not being able to sense a hint of demonic energy from her.
"You lived here?" For some reason, I felt nostalgic upon looking at it as well.
"No, but my family did for a little while."
All my understanding of demons as lesser creatures may have remained unfettered, but the evidence was before me as it stood, these demons as different as they were… Possessed something that separated them from the vulgar crowd, and the evidence was right in front of me.
"Is there more to this world? Or am I at the end of my journey? Answer me this one time."
"Your journey? For power? That could never end, but right now? There is much more to these ruins than what's meeting the eye, an entire world beyond it waiting for us." She was smarter than she let on with her use of words, but I couldn't help but feel a nagging suspicion that she was warning me.
About what?
Before I could ponder further, I heard heavily padded steps from behind. "Oh goodness! It's you again, are you willing to talk with me? My apologies for startling you earlier." The woman from before, the demon who bore no Ill will towards me, an enigma. Before I could even address her in this disheveled state she was in, the horned woman had asked me if I would talk… She was rather forward with what she wanted, but I preferred this over the motherly role she tried to take over me.
"Is this your domain? Your living?" I asked softly without turning to look at her, I had absorbed the star ahead of me already, and so my mind was at peace, if just for a moment.
The goat-demon didn't respond for a moment, I could feel her worried gaze on the back of my head. "Oh dear… What have you gone through?" She muttered below her breath, although I was able to hear her anyway.
She finally nodded, "Yes, this is my home, and if you'd like, it can be yours as well." My eyes shot open before narrowing dangerously, my grip tightened around the Yamato and and turned on a heel to face her. She was smiling at me.
I reigned in my anger last second, "I need no home, I am a wandering mercenary, I need the source of power that emanates from this place, I need MORE POWER." It was something I had been repeating to myself for many years now, since that day, a self assuring mantra.
She nodded with a calculating gaze for whatever reason, even with her smile unchanging, "I see, well, I can't promise anything for you dear, but I can try to tell you as much I can…" She was sad at my outburst, that was evident, I merely scoffed. Feeling the cold gaze on the back of my head much unlike the demon's, I glance to see Chara still levitating above me with a glare marring her innocent face.
I turned back to the woman, "Don't try to mother me, it's unbecoming of a being so strong, I don't tolerate weakness from me or others, and not from myself either." I repeated what I said earlier to the foolish girl who wouldn't leave me alone.
"Oh, you can sense my demonic energy? I'm impressed young one, and I apologize." She bowed to me, I tried to look elsewhere but was met with the fury of my astral companion. I stuttered slightly as the goat-demon took my hand and guided me into her housing. This time I didn't pull away, the warmth of her fur was somewhat comforting… Not that I'd admit it.
"My name is Toriel by the way, I am the caretaker of these ruins."
I paused for but a moment.
"My name… doesn't matter."
"Then it doesn't matter, come, I could prepare a pie if you'd like?" She spoke to him without the motherly, childish tone from before, but from her genuine self… He appreciated it, if there was anything he hated..
It was being perceived as weak.
"... My thanks, demon." She beamed at me, and so did her 'daughter'
She'd left me to explore her house, saying that in moments she'd have a pie ready for me. I couldn't deny to myself I was a sweet tooth, but it was a weakness I refused to admit outright. She turned to the left and requested I get familiar with the place, even in spite of my immediate goal to leave.
...
While in my thoughts, the spectre hovered at my side with a thankful look, "You did better this time, thank you." Chara spoke to me in a less demeaning tone, but all I could do was grumble as I trudged through the hallway, the revitalization of the star wearing off already, it was no substitute for food and a good night's rest, and even if my devil blood allowed me to stay awake for days at a time, fatigue eventually caught up, it always did.
"I didn't do anything, I merely acted with a higher level of manners, my feelings have not changed, once I am rested and fed, I shall continue onwards." My absolute echoed for a second or two, and the silence was crashed through by the sigh of my ghostly companion.
"I guess that's all I can hope for, and here I thought humans couldn't get anymore selfish." I didn't react outwardly to her comment, "You are more human than I, girl, Toriel is not your mother." She chuckled, gesturing to an invisible audience.
"Truly ingenious deduction, wonder how you came to that conclusion, brainlet." Her crass language was mildly concerning, even to me.
"You speak too roughly for a girl your age." I turned a corner and entered a room sharply after saying that, avoiding the onslaught of obscenities thrown my way with the click of a door shutting.
Laid before me was a child's bedroom, a single bed with plushies between it and the wall. I tore off the rags that were my clothing and left them clumped at the center of the room, leaving my chest bare, my legs covered. As I held the amulet wrapped around my neck, I cared not for the appearance of Chara in the room.
My blue eyes narrowed into slits, her ruby red eyes widened as they caught mine, face turning even redder than usual. I scoffed at her leave as she dissipated behind the wall from whence she came.
Her body flushed behind the wall, her hands and body laid flat against it. "Dear Asgore… That devil boy is too much of a human to make me flustered like this…" The red eyed girl shook her head and slapped her cheeks, cursing herself underneath her breath.
"I'm such an idiot." She slumped against the wall, wallowing in her moment of weakness, she wanted to hate that guy so much…
"But he's so confusing… Respectful yet arrogant, prideful yet softly spoken, violent but reserved… An enigma if I've ever seen one… Darn, why couldn't I have bonded my soul to a mute instead? Would be a lot less confusing, arghhh!" Yelping suddenly, Chara stood to her feet as her mother swiftly passed through her, a plate with a slice of pie in hand, she gently turned the doorknob.
"Young one, I'm coming in." When there was no response, she entered quietly. Her eyes glazed over the sleeping form of the mysterious boy, his arm holding the blade close to him as if he would be attacked at any moment. Toriel nodded before kneeling down at the center of the room, leaving the confection at the center of the room before turning to him and taking a blanket in her arms.
"Rest now, I can see in your eyes, hardened as they are, that you've seen many horrors in your time, an unfitting fate for someone as innocent. I wish you a peaceful sleep." She put her hand out to touch the boy's forehead as he slept, but pulled back just before she could.
Chara watched from the hallway, her red eyes slipping out from behind the wall as she witnessed the interaction, frowning as Toriel walked through her once more, hoping for a second that the goat-demon would feel anything… but alas, nothing.
"How can you do it Mother… how can you see him and… Want to protect him? To comfort him? A human, a demon with no empathy?" A being like he was, he could only bring misery to those around him.
Just like her, so long ago.
"D-Dante…" The ghost shot her attention towards the Devil.
...
In my dreams, there was a fire.
And then I woke, my eyes snapping open clear as day. I sat up instantly feeling Yamato at my side before moving my legs out of the covers and onto the ground below, my head was finally cleared up slightly from the short sleep.
Long has it been since I started getting dreams of the fire that plagued my existence, the dawn of my new life, that day… The house is burning to cinders…
"Pathetic…" I spoke to myself, looking where I left my clothing only to see a new assortment of garb next to a single slice of pie… She had replaced my rags with a black pair of pants, a black undershirt, and a blue turtleneck coat that was meant to stave off the cold… She had guessed my favorite color…
"That woman…" My stomach grumbled, and for once I mindlessly let myself be lost to the urges of my hunger. Taking the pie in my hand, somehow it was still warm, the confection was baked evenly and just perfect I could tell, I leveraged it into my mouth. A muted ecstasy filled my body as the desert melted away in my mouth, quite literally becoming pure energy. For the first time since many nights and many days, I felt a true smile curve into my lips as I devoured the pie with high vigour.
"Didn't think you liked pastries so much… That donut didn't get you addicted to sugar, I'd hope not?" I choked for a second, my face slightly flushing before I turned to glare at Chara, her amused smirk infuriating me to no end.
"Must you ruin everything, girl?" I asked honestly, pulling my new pair of pants up and then slipping the undershirt over my body. It wasn't cold enough to wear the jacket quite yet.
"No, but since you want to be a jerk all the time, I must remind you how much I appreciate it." She snickered before turning away and exiting through a wall, I had finished the pie before she even finished leaving.
"Hmph, foolish human…"
...
The living room was warm, lit by a gentle flame that seemed warm to the touch instead of dangerous. I strolled past Chara who was busy laying down flat on her back next to the fire, much like that Napstablook fellow from before. Toriel herself was busy reading a book in the rocking chair besides the fire as well.
"You're awake, that's good." She didn't look up from her reading, but she spoke to me with a soft friendly tone.
"... Your pie was... Passable." She chuckled quietly at my feigned admittance, Chara was gobsmacked herself much to my hidden amusement. To think I could show my appreciation.
"Think nothing of it my child, I live now to take care of the fallen children who arrive here… For whichever reason they deem dire, they come here for one or another. I realize it wouldn't be smart to pry into you, so I won't bother you much my child, promise." She smiled at me warmly, I couldn't help but feel warm myself.
"Smart choice… Toriel…" It had been a long time since I used someone else's name.
She then glanced downwards to my blade with a curious look, "Although if you don't mind me asking, what is the extent of your skill with that blade? It seems rather impressive even for a human weapon." She meant that as a compliment, meaning she'd seen humans prior?
Regardless, I spoke as objectively as possible. "My skills are incredible, I have trained since my youth and have indescribable reflexes and speed. My sword, the Yamato, is enchanted with the ability to cut through anything." I unsheathed it slightly, allowing a small glimmer of the blade to escape.
She looked with a fascination in her eyes, "Incredible, my child, you are truly a devil then?" I nodded curtly, much to her satisfaction, my eyebrow twitching at her use of 'my child.'
A small smile curved upon her muzzle, "Well, you are certainly much better mannered than the devil's I've met in my time…" She trailed off, closing her book completely.
"Yep, she's old as bones, she doesn't seem to show it though." Chara spoke from the ground, her eyes still firmly planted on the ceiling above. I sat down next to Chara, my Yamato leaning against me as I leaned by the fire and embraced its warmth. "This fire… it's unlike any I've ever felt, as if I could place my hand in and all it would do is bring a slight warmth."
"Why actually, it's my fire magic, I can freely control the temperature of it." My eyes warmed with mystique, such a power… Most demons were raw, primal in nature, their flames licked at the hottest they could. But… Toriel chose a calm flame instead. It was a true testament to her character, and yet I had been ready to cut her down as if she was the average demon. I wondered at that moment, had my pursuit for power truly blinded me to the nuance of the world?
No.
Nothing could shake my resolve…
"Dark revolving in silent activity:
Unseen in tormenting passions;
An activity unknown and horrible;
A self-contemplating shadow,
In enormous labours occupied…" I lamented suddenly, my voice soft.
Chara flipped over onto her stomach, her eyes widened slightly after my recitation. "I didn't think you were a poet, you're sure full of surprises huh?" I didn't respond to her, only catching the eyes of Toriel as she smiled warmly down at me.
"I guess you could say that…" Trailing off, Toriel seemed to have wanted to say something but stopped herself at the last second. I didn't let the confusion get to me, and continued to rest by the fire.
"She was going to say a pun, but you are too much of a downer that she doesn't want to anymore.." Chara groaned, and couldn't imagine why she was bothering to speak at the moment.
"My… My friend, what is it that you want to know about us down here?" Toriel asked me, I was glad she dropped the "my child.", Truly, I don't want to be known as such anymore…
I thought for a moment, "Do you know of Mundus? Can you tell me of him?" She nodded solemnly, a grim expression donning her fuzzy face.
"Why yes, I do, oh how it's been so long… My ex-husband was once a mighty general in his demonic army, but… When Sparda turned against Mundus, he gained his own followers, ASGORE… was one of them and we attempted to live in peace with the humans for a while, offering them protection from other demons despite our realm being of the weaker ilk. When Sparda severed the link between the human and demon worlds, we chose to stay with the humans, forming a close relationship…" I listened intently, history was a subject I subscribed to and so I could not dither to absorb as much as I could… Knowledge is power, Sparda himself would say...
A melancholic smile appeared on her face, "The humans grew weary of us after many centuries of status quo, our benefits to their world taken for granted in place for fear of our ability to absorb human souls and become more powerful than what could possibly be imagined, they banished us here after a bloody war fearing exactly that." Shutting her eyes, I could see the moisture pool around them.
My mind racing, could hardly respond, "I see…", Chara seemed to have a cruel vicious snarl, her eyes burning brightly at the story. I even felt myself taken aback slightly by the masked hatred behind her innocent expression, certainly there was more than meets the eye.
Chara interjected with her own opinion on the matter, "That's right, humanity took the demons of the underground for granted, a sinless race of people compared to those filthy primates…" Venom dripped from her every word, I could see her clothing begin to flow gently around her as she exercised her will.
I turned back to Toriel, who was watching me curiously. "Tell me, young one, why is it that you've come here? Truly?" I knew the answer almost immediately.
"Power."
"For the sake of it?" She has a tinge of despair lacing her question, as if she thought I was merely power hungry.
"No, without power you can't protect anything, much less yourself, without power… You are a mere slave to the world and it's machinations." The horned-demon gave me a small look of sorrow, holding her hand over her chest.
"I see, I'm sorry the world has been too cruel to you…" My eyes flickered with frustration for a moment, before calming. I wasn't in the mood for much conversation anymore.
"This power of a human soul… Do you think a half devil like me could acquire it?" Toriel paused for a small moment, gaining a quizzical gaze.
"It was a power specialized by our realm that set us apart from the rest, born weaker, but given the chance, a human soul would make us incredibly powerful… I'm not sure, it's truly something I'm unable to answer." I sighed, looking away from Toriel, she continued to read. Chara laid away from him as they spoke, her outburst earlier made her feel… Childish, I could only surmise.
Suddenly, I asked the question I knew she was dreading for whatever reason, "Toriel, how do I leave here?" Like a pin drop, my words echoed throughout the room, drowned out by the silence that followed.
"..."
"I would rather you not leave, but I can tell by the look in your eyes that you cannot be persuaded." The tone of voice she used… It was detached, as if she had been disillusioned. She looked through me, as if I no longer existed.
Toriel stood suddenly, leaving swiftly, me and Chara both watched as she did so, me with a stoic frown, and her with a worried glance. I hastily followed after, only to be stopped by Chara, her arms raised to the side in order to halt my stride.
"Listen to me right now you filthy mongrel..." She grinded out those curses with a guttural tone, her eyes narrowed into slits.
"If you kill her, I will make your life a living hell for the rest of your days, I will make you regret ever stepping foot in these ruins!" I scoffed at her, nudging her out of my way only to feel a slight grip on my arm.
She stared directly into my eyes, red versus blue "You think I'm kidding right now don't you? Listen to me, I'm begging you, I get that we humans love to inflict suffering on others, especially when we are suffering ourselves, but please…" She looked downwards suddenly, her voice beginning to fade and crack as her realization of powerlessness seeped in.
"I don't want to lose the only Mother I've ever known…" I removed her hand from my arm, staving my gaze and taking in a solid breath of air.
"I won't kill her." I said.
"..."
I continued on, leaving Chara in the living room by her lonesome. I had a mission to complete, before leaving, I grabbed the blue coat from the room I had slumbered in.
I trudged through the decrepit basement halls beneath her home, descending down the stairs I knew she had just a moment prior. The she-demon was an enigma to me, displaying an intelligence beyond that of the average demon, while holding the purity of a mother, not unlike...
"Silence…" Quieting my inner monologue, I knew once I turned this corner I would be faced with Toriel once again. Before I knew it, there she was, standing with her back faced towards me and the room shadowed by the flames that licked her hands.
"Six." She spoke, a tragedy lined on her vocal cords.
"Six children before you, each one different, each one unique, of differing ages and motivation… Six. Six children I never got to see again." She said, her monologue ending.
I frowned, "I am no child."
She nodded, "Perhaps not, but you are still young, and how it hurts me so to see you in such a state of anger and sorrow, no matter how much you try to hide, a mother can see these things. And it hurts me more to know that if I let you through, you might end a life…" My response died in my throat as she turned her gaze to me, the friendly woman before was no more.
"And if you die, then Asgore will take your soul, he only needs seven to destroy the barrier and wage war against human kind, his plan… He wants to destroy them all…"
"He's not wrong to want such a thing."
"You'd side with him? A murderer? He's killed every last one of you fallen children..." If she was disappointed, she didn't show it.
I scoffed at her reductionism, "His motivation is strong, I can tell that much. He is right to despise humanity, to wish for their downfall, humanities evil's are near unending." I was no human, I was a devil, a higher class of existence. Humanity was a sorely weakling race of creatures, I saw them without mirth or malice.
"And yet they are just as capable of good, that's their duality isn't it? Their choice?" A part of me knew she was right, but I was hardly in the mood to argue philosophy with a demon, especially regarding humanity.
"Enough, allow me to pass." She tsked, her face contorting into a mocking snarl.
"Just like the others, fine…"
She began to stare through me, aloof and unattached. "I won't bother stopping you, the small moment I felt your strength when we first met you proved to me then and there that nothing in my power that would let me beat you into obeying me." Her ears began to droop, the flames in her hands dying out as her emotions shifted from aloof to sad. I had won the battle before it had even begun.
"..." I said nothing as she approached me, no tears in her eye, but a solemn expression none the less.
And then… She wrapped her arms around my small frame, burying me in the crook of her fuzzy neck. I released a small breath as if I had been hit with a giant club, my eyes shaking and my arms hanging loosely at my sides. I couldn't move, hardly even could I breath with her warmth covering my body.
We remained that way for some time, eventually I collected myself, staring through her as she embraced my tiny body without me returning it. It felt like hours before she released me finally, my heart didn't beat any faster, my skin only felt colder. And my eyes burned no brighter, my heart simmered despite it.
Standing to her full height, she refused to look down at me, "After you leave… Please don't come back." That was all she could manage before walking past, I didn't move from my spot, didn't look back to see her leave. I simply walked forward, opening the exit and taking my leave…
But before I left, I asked one more question.
"Toriel?" My voice was soft.
"..."
"Did you know Sparda?"
"... I did not, only Asgore… Only he knew Sparda." I nodded, exiting the ruins at last. Disgusted at my acceptance of her help, her charity, my heart yearned to escape her influence. But…
For whatever little she could make me feel…
Toriel…
Thank you
...
If you wanted to read the rest, I have the full story on ao3:
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