#and how we are happy to slap a “crazy” label on people like me but at the same time we're actually kinda onto something??
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Oh gawd that feel when as a schizospec you kinda know that your phone was listening in on you yesterday talking about how you would wanna do makeup as a potential job if you could even manage a job and now Insta ads just gave you an ad about a makeup class in your area. I HATE hate hate it that our phones actually stalk us like this it gives me the creeps. Tech companies seriously STOP it. I don't need to be attacked like this in my own home.
Maybe I should start turning my phone off in appointments but like I need it to write notes down cos my foggy ass brain can't remember things the next day or even hour/minute sometimes
I feel like the more tech "advances" the more of a crisis society lurches into, to a point where it's getting harder and harder to convince schizospec/delusional/psychotic spectrum folks out of delusions/paranoia about being spied on
Genuine question: how can we protect ourselves when privacy laws obviously don't? I know i share a lot on here but that's stuff I willingly chose to share
#schizospec problems#tech is creepy#Matsson was right when he said “people are data”#i know he was joking about saying it but it's actually right#i wanna do some art exploring this whole thing#and how we are happy to slap a “crazy” label on people like me but at the same time we're actually kinda onto something??#sorry not trying to trigger or encourage anyone with delusions#just feeling hard-done-by by the irony#schizospec#delusions#mental health crisis#mental health#privacy laws#privacy#schizospec safety#question#Rachel rambles
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Happy holidays to you 🎄🎁🌟❤️
*whispers* , who do you think deserves better
Lotor or Ben Solo/Kylo Ren
First of all: thank you so much! Happy Holidays to you, too!! I hope you are enjoying this holiday season with your loved ones 🎄🎀☃️💖
And second of all: NOOOO Anon how could you make me choose??! 😭😂😂
My gut reaction is to say both of them, but that's not really the answer we're looking for here, is it? Hehe. So I have tried to seriously consider this and provide a sincere answer to your question.
A quick heads up, I will be mentioning reylo and lotura here and there throughout this little essay!
The most fun part about comparing Ben and Lotor I think comes from the fact that these two are suuuuper similar to one another. I covered this a tiny bit in this ask where I talk about how protective the two of them are, but to reiterate:
Both Lotor and Ben are from sci-fi/fantasy franchises that were released around the same time, both have troubled relationships with their fathers, both are great swordsmen and pilots and engineers, both murdered their fathers, have complicated childhoods, rarely show their true faces to others, killed their dads, fell in love with fierce and powerful women, kissed said fierce and powerful women before shortly dying afterwards, said bye-bye to papa by doin a lil stabby stab, became intergalatic leaders of the most powerful empires in the universe -- oh, and did I mention daddy issues? You tend to find that a lot with long-haired emo boys from fiction. It's just the way it is. And for these two in particular you can also sprinkle in a little "mommy issues" just for funsies.
But in all seriousness, Lotor and Ben share a LOT in common, which is pretty crazy! So who deserves better, really? In order to make a fair judgment my first thought was to take into account their crimes and if they were able to redeem themselves in the end. But this is also fiction. As soon as people slap the label "toxic" on a character or ship, I usually tend to tune them out. This is by no means a hot take, but fiction is a form of escapism. It is a way for people to experience a thing (e.g. horror, adventure, romance) without actually having to experience it. So if we have a couple of sad boys who murder and manipulate people but also want to find love, who's gonna stop us from rooting for them? Absolutely no one!
I digress, but my point is that I usually don't care which character did what and why they're a bad person for it. But even then were Ben and Lotor really all that bad? After all, we learned from "The Rise of Kylo Ren" comics that Ben was ultimately not the one responsible for destroying Luke's Jedi school, and in TROS we found out that he was being manipulated by Palpatine the entire time.
For Lotor, we never really got a clear picture of what exactly he was doing with that Altean colony. To this day I still don't get it! In S6E6 he says, "Many Alteans perished in my quest to unlock the mysteries of quintessence." But then in S8E13 Allura says, "Lotor may have been misguided, but ultimately he wanted to preserve life." Like, what does any of that mean?? There are cracks in the armor, Anon! Cracks!!! Not to mention all of the theories with very convincing evidence that there were a ton of changes made to season 8, and unfortunately I don't think we're ever going to get a solid answer from the showrunners as to what was really supposed to happen.
In the end, the complicated and morally gray choices that Lotor and Ben made throughout their lives are what make their characters so interesting! They did the wrong things for what they believed to be the right reasons. If they didn't come across as the mysterious and devious fellas as they did when we first saw them, we wouldn't be such big fans of them. We would've chosen someone else 😉
So any bad deeds aside, maybe we oughta take a step back and do one last comparison. Most notably, comparing how they died. Ben died saving the person he loved, while Lotor died fighting the person he loved. I would have to argue that Lotor's death was far more gruesome and superfluous than Ben's. Not only did he go mad from all of the raw quintessence coursing through his body, but we find out in season 8 that his body had remained in his ship for three whole years, decayed and melted (seriously whose idea was it to share that imagery? I'm scarred for life) and left to sit there by his own mother.
Ben's passing was also deeply upsetting. I cried in the theater. But you can't deny that it was a peaceful one. From the way his body faded into nothingness, leaving beind only his clothes, the audience is able to assume that he became a Force Ghost (or did he? 🤔). He was battered and beaten, but he brought the woman he loved back to life, and in giving his life to her and helping her defeat Palpatine, he redeemed himself. And not only did he redeem himself, but he was also able to reconcile with both of his parents.
Lotor didn't get to do either of those things. He never got the chance. He was manipulated by both of his parents, and he never had the opportunity to redeem himself on his own terms. You know, for someone who directly influenced the entirety of season 8's plot, Lotor is hardly in it! I suppose he sort of redeemed himself, at least in Allura's eyes, but he was long gone by then. He wasn't around to see any of the stuff going on in season 8, stuff happening specifically FOR him because his mother wanted him back. In season 6 he went out like your average cartoon villain--dying because of his own hubris while the heroes looked on. In season 8 we only get: a flashback episode, him showing up in Allura's bedroom ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), and him copied and pasted into the background as a ghost in the finale, almost like something is amiss in this scene (cracks in the armor, Anon!!!). UGH. You hate to see it.
But at the same time, I'm not too upset that Lotor died if I'm being completely honest with you. At least not anymore, anyway. Don't get me wrong, at the time I cried when his death was confirmed, and then I cried again when Allura died. But at least they get to be together in the afterlife. Ben had a lot going for him. He was only 30 years old when he died, and that's still very young. He could have had a long, happy life with Rey, and to truly redeem himself in the eyes of the resistance, could have devoted his time to restoring peace and order to the galaxy, as well as teach the new generation of Force-wielders alongside Rey.
Lotor, on the other hand, was 10,000 years old. The idea of having lived that long is not only unfathomable, but the fact that he probably spent most of that time being completely alone is just... really, really sad. If I were him I would have been ready to kick the bucket, too. I think the kindest thing to do for him at that point was to give him a peaceful, as well as justified, departure in the series finale. Allura had suffered as well. She had lost everything, just like him, so the two of them finding peace in the afterlife would be the most merciful conclusion, I believe.
Soooo I'm gonna cheat again with my answer 😂 Who deserves better? I would say BOTH of them deserve better, but in different ways. Ben Solo deserved to live, while Lotor deserved a better death.
Thank you so much for this question, Anon! I really had to think a lot about this one, and even though in the end I couldn't actually choose between the two, I still enjoyed coming up with this long-winded answer haha! If you have any further insights you would like to add, or if you even disagree with any of the things I've said, please don't hesitate to say so! I am always happy to discuss anything Ben or Lotor-related 😁 My love for these boys knows no bounds 💖
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episode 5 has left me considering the different - and similar - ways taeyoung and kwonsook think about themselves, and how they respond to pain/violence.
kwonsook calls herself a monster, someone who goes crazy in the boxing ring. that monster, she says, was created by her father, and her father used abuse, violence, and emotional manipulation to create that monster. he didn’t treat her like human, so it’s no surprise that the way she talks about herself when she boxes is as if she’s discussing an animal: she gets cornered, gets scared for her life, and lashes out to kill. she calls herself a monster with resignation; it’s not what she wanted to be, but she knows it’s what she was. she ran away to escape that monstrosity, to live as a human, doing good things, but that part of her never really died.
taeyoung, too, calls himself a monster. he’s a SOB, he does thing no one with an ounce of humanity would do. he seemingly has no qualms about what he does, perhaps because he can always justify it to himself, always has an exit prepared for when things really get bad (until, i’m sure, he doesn’t). like kwonsook, taeyoung accepts the label of monster, accepts his own inhumanity, even if they are inhuman in very different ways. whereas kwonsook wants to break away from that monstrous part of her - she’s only returned so she can free herself from that part of herself permanently (and if she finds a way to box without a monster, then...) - taeyoung embraces it. it’s through being a monster that he’s found success, how he secures futures for his athletes, and how he’s able to ‘solve’ their (and his) issues. monstrosity was not imposed on taeyoung, but (due to what we know so far) is something he chose for himself (although the factors surrounding this part of his past are decidedly murky).
in this episode, taeyoung and kwonsook also demonstrate similar responses to violence and (emotional) pain. when taeyoung upsets kwonsook by working with her father behind her back, he offers her an outlet for her anger by punching him. later on, after ahreum has already slapped kwonsook, instead of lashing out, kwonsook offers to let ahreum hit her again if it will make her feel better. in parallel responses, both ahreum and kwonsook debate taking that opportunity to hurt, but decide not to (kwonsook because she’s taking a chance on taeyoung, or moreso giving him another one, and ahreum because she decides that she doesn’t owe kwonsook that, that kwonsook is beneath her in terms of boxing, no longer on her level).
kwonsook learned to respond to pain at a young age. in boxing, you can’t flinch from the hit - you have to learn how to take the pain, absorb it, and get back up to hit again. outside of the rink, kwonsook absorbs the pain, but she doesn’t hit again. she’s experienced firsthand what her hits can do to people, and that terrified her. after all, she only boxed so that she could protect her mother. so when confronted with violence and pain, she takes the hit, because pain is what she knows and understands. it’s the emotions behind it that are hard for her. pain is easy for kwonsook, because she’s used to living through it, surviving it; beneath it, she’s always empty. she’s never really cared about boxing; it was what she had to do. the lee kwonsook that was a boxing genius was a monster she ran from, after all. but in order to break away from that monster, she has to come to understand the emotional investment of her fellow female boxers. before, they were just her opponents, never her friends, but now she has to face their own feelings about the sport, the passion they have for boxing that she never felt. like ara said, she didn’t feel happiness about winning, and kwonsook has never lost, so she’s never had to live with that humiliation, either. how her feelings will change in relation to boxing will likely be a reckoning for her.
taeyoung, on the other hand, is confronting his fair share of non-boxing sanctioned boxing. even though kwonsook is the boxer, it’s taeyoung who’s been touched by ‘true’ violence in this present timeline. his life is quite literally on the line, which has been shown again and again. he’s been ambushed by her father, threatened, blackmailed, and beaten up by chairman nam’s guys. he lives on the edge, anxious at every shadow, which is chewing him alive. to him, kwonsook’s anger is much easier to deal with. he knows she might hurt him, but his potential to hurt her is so much more (and if he does, in that case he’d find her anger justified, and probably let her beat him to death or something if what we’ve seen of his feelings for her is an indication of anything), and she might hurt him, but she’d never hurt him as much as other people in his life at the moment would (i.e. by killing him, or hurting the people he cares about). taeyoung is used to weathering the storm of other people’s dislike; he’s the scumbag, and he does bad things, deserves other people’s anger when it’s directed at him.
both taeyoung and kwonsook want to resolve things through violence. i think it’s telling that despite being two emotionally aware people, they both consider other people’s feelings to be so easily taken care of. they want the quick, instant pain, and then they want to get it over with. because the violence is what they’re used to, and to a degree it’s what they both think they deserve. however, what lies beneath that, what doesn’t go away with a single hit, is much harder for them to confront and understand.
#star stumbles#my lovely boxer#kdrama#my thoughts#in boxing you get hit and you hit someone else and whoever is still standing wins#and it's basically that way in the whole world of (physical) sports#and it's going to be so so good when they both end up embroiled in the very emotional situation that they both want to avoid at all costs#ie their feelings for each other / betrayal / broken trust / fear#i think i ended this poorly i kind of got distracted and honestly...honestly i don't KNOW what their response to violence really says#or how it's going to be played with throughout the drama#this text is the bare bones of what i can understand through what i've seen#and oh yes even though i know some people might argue that they're not emotionally aware i think they are...#both very emotionally mature. despite their actions they both know what's up in their hearts#and they're very adept at reading one another (or at least taeyoung is towards kwonsook i think she's getting there but she's also trying to#distance herself from him so. i do think she's ignoring some of what she'll probably reinterpret later on#nobody made taeyoung a monster he chose that path vs kwonsook left the path as soon as she was able to#and her getting punished for his bad deeds...even though at the end she admits they're both scumbags for going through with this deal#because she's understood that she'll hurt boxing whether good things come out of it or not#because she'll be disrespecting ahreum and everyone else by rigging the match and losing on purpose#which will probably add to her conflict later on#and taeyoung simultaneously struggles with not wanting to string her along vs stringing her along#because he's been upfront with her about how he's a bad person and she sees it too but ALSO#he can't bring himself to tell her some of the worst things because he wants her to see him differently#like he wants to act like a good person for her but also knows he needs her#honestly their relationship dynamic reminds me so much of my liberation notes#it's the ahjussi / disenchanted two people approaching each other and something ending up growing there where they thought nothing would#again
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ok so…
i’ll just start from the top with high touch and the grp photo
when i tell you i was shitting myself with anxiety…….. we made line friends with a few people and we bonded over how anxious we were
it went by So fast but then again the whole thing felt crazy fast maybe bc we were waiting outside and inside for so long
but we were at the very front of the vip line which means we were first after vvip…. crazy. and i was like maybe the third person in the single file line but we walked in the theater and they were just lined up there and all i could think was “fuck fuck fuck fuck they don’t look real fuck fuck fuck” AND THEY DIDNT. THEY DONT. like it’s crazy they don’t look real they’re so gorgeous SUNGHO ESPECIALLY MY GOOOOOOD
but we went down the line giving each member a high five it was junji > taeyeob > wookjin ? > kyubin > sungho > yongsoo and for junji and taeyeob it was like a gentle high five but wook and kyubin Went for it like they fully high five you AND THEYRE SO TALL im short im barely 5’4 BUT THEYRE SO TALL
after we went down the line we circled back around to behind the chairs they were standing in front of for the grp photo and I WAS FUCKING RIGHT BEHIND YOOJUNG. and i was waving at all of them as they sat down and kyubin looks me dead in the face with his fake nose piercing and says “hey” with a smile as he sits down
GIRL.
LIKESHJDOFHHDBS WHAT STOP THAT
But i was too nervous to like tap yoojungs shoulder to do a heart or anything lmao so i just did a peace sign and stared at the back of his head like what is happening.
after we got out of snapshot me fern and one of the friends we made had a grp hug all on the verge of tears it was very sweet
then it was a bit more waiting and we filed back into the concert hall whatever you wanna call it and their performances were fucking amazingggggggggg
kyubin ripped open his shirt during asoiaf junji kissed rie on the cheek or the other way around it’s all a blur all i heard was the sound and saw junjis embarrassed face yoojung pretended to be santa claus but one of his mustache bits flew off they did a la la land bit that included sungho slapping kyubins ass as the percussion it was a fucking wild time
taeyeob was blowing kisses the whole time it was so sweet i love him🥹
OH MY GOD HOW DID I ALMOST FORGET during the la la land bit kyubin was asking the crowd if we’ve seen la la land and i put both thumbs up AND HE GAVE ME A THUMBS UP FUCKING BACK WHAT THE FUCK this man has me in a chokehold
but um yeah for encore they did asoiaf angel and onlyoneof you when i tell you i was so relieved they were doing onlyoneof you considering i spent like two hours labeling all the hearts yesterday with my mom
but during angel they had the whole crowd jump with them it was so cute 🥹🥹 i remember jumping and coming up in the air to see kyubin shaking his ass he’s wild i love him
my view wasn’t great but it wasn’t terrible i’m happy with it overall 🫶🫶
but yes i held up my heart during onlyoneof you and a few people around me did and i saw a bunch more throughout the crowd which really warmed my heart and i saw wookjin point at one and smile 🥹 which is gonna make me cry but my whole goal was to make them feel loved and i feel accomplished in that even if not every member saw them i’m glad at least one did
and for the photo after asoiaf before angel and ooo you i passed forward the flag as fast as i possibly could lmao and yongsoo was over by our side and he grabbed it 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 he put it around himself and wore it for one pic but then the staff grabbed all the flags and took two more pics without them 💔 but we did lion pose first then i love you pose with hand hearts and that’s the one that they posted on their story
after the concert they told people with snapshot to stay in the concert hall and premium was gonna go first and i was able to stay with a couple line friends but they had kyubin and i had yoojung so we had to split up for the night </3 but they were so so nice and one of them let us use her perfume so we didn’t smell for snapshots 😭😭
i anxiously got in line after taeyeob finished up premiums and there was one person in front of me screams and they had to change the film cartridge thing so they got a little extra time and i was just staring at the floor trying not to be awkward but then it was my turn and she (kelly unfortunately) asked what pose i wanted, i looked at the thing to be sure and told her the number, she told him the number he said hello! and i said hi! and we took the picture and our shoulders touched and i felt very ahdjroehhegkigbd about it yknow and he MADE EYE CONTACT which i’m afraid of but he’s so gorgeous oh my god… and so fucking tall i felt so short even in my tall shoes😭 but he made eye contact and said thank you for coming WHICH I WAS ABOUT TO SAY so i just said thank You for coming! and as i was walking (like two feet away) to get the polaroid from her he said have a good night! but it took me way too long to process he said that so i had to yell back you too!! and then i ran to fern and died a little while i waited for it develop but it’s so cute and i love him and i don’t believe it’s real it’s photoshop there’s no way tonight happened
#so yeah…..#long post#this is a lot longer than i thought it was gonna be but#they’re crazy and they do things to me so#theo.txt#ooo concert#onlyoneof
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I’m With the Band Part 13
Words: 1.5k
I’m With the Band Masterlist Main Masterlist
Van was right to be impressed with the hotel suite the band had been booked into. It was the penthouse and pretty luxurious even by my standards and I nodded with approval as I walked around, taking everything in. There was a large living area with comfy looking sofas and a well stocked bar, and six bedrooms leading off from it. The far wall was made up of huge floor to ceiling glass sliding doors that opened out on to an open air terrace complete with decking and multiple seating areas and a massive hot tub.
"Ahh man this is class!" Van marvels. "When Dan said it was posh I didn't realise it was gonna be this nice. Look Larry... there's even a fucking jacuzzi! I'll be getting in that later."
Then he looks right at me purposefully. "What d'ya reckon eh Bella? Fancy taking a dip later?"
I'm surprised he's still speaking to me after my antics from earlier, but I find that I'm actually pleasantly surprised. No matter how much fun I take from winding him up I realise that I don't want him to stop pursuing me. I like it.
A smile fights to emerge but I bite it back down, instead giving Van a look which shows just enough aloofness to brush him off without completely disregarding him. "Well, I don't have my bikini do I?"
Van's eyebrows shoot up in a mischievous gesture. "I don't see that as being a problem."
I roll my eyes theatrically, shaking my head and turning away so Van can't see the smirk that's forming, just in time to catch Johnny's eye. He gives me a small, slightly awkward grin and looks away.
Shit... why does Van have to flirt so blatantly with me in front of the others? He's about as subtle as a punch in the face.
I cross over to Johnny and flash him a winning smile, and he perks up instantly. "So... shall we get some drinks on the go? Get the party started eh?" He grabs a couple of glasses as he speaks.
I look around, taking in the assembled people in the room and I sigh. Van and Larry are bickering loudly about whether Van should get dibs on the master bedroom after all, and Benji is sitting on the sofa looking sullen whilst staring at his blank phone screen. Bob and Lucy have disappeared outside.
"Is this... it?" I say to Johnny. "It doesn't seem like much of a party."
"Dan says there'll be more people showing up pretty soon. Since it's the record label who've put us up in this fancy hotel there'll be a load of industry people turning up no doubt."
I detect a hint of disfavour in his voice which surprises me. Who wouldn't want to be courted and looked after by people who serve to further your already promising career?
"You don't sound very enthusiastic about that," I comment, reaching for a bottle of vodka which I slide over to him.
He shrugs, twisting the cap off the bottle. "It's just some of the types that move in those circles that I'm really not that keen on. I'm not into all that schmoozing, none of us are. We just wanna play gigs, we're not really bothered about selling records."
I shake my head, stunned. "That's crazy! Why wouldn't you want to be rich and successful?"
Johnny smiles as he pours out generous measures of vodka. "Successful? Yeah. But rich? I'm not in this for the money."
Now I know he's crazy. Money makes the world go round. That's what they say, isn't it? It certainly keeps me happy in my designer clothes and limited edition Gucci handbags.
Johnny laughs at my dumbfounded expression.
"Well, the money must still be nice though, right?" I ask.
He reaches for the tonic, still chuckling. "It's a bonus I guess. And if we want to get bigger we need to record and release an album, it's the next logical step for us. But I'd play even if we were still on the pub circuit. It's the music, you see. I love it... we all do. It's in here."
He reaches up a hand to slap his chest right over his heart. "It's a passion." He adds sincerely.
This warms my own heart in an unexpected way, and I find myself stepping closer, reaching for Johnny's hand. "Fancy sitting outside to drink these? It's a nice night?"
His smile widens and I notice him look behind me in Van and Larry's direction briefly before his eyes are on me again, reaching for one of the glasses with his free hand. "Yeah, that'd be lovely."
I pick up my own glass, other hand still linked with Johnny's, starting for the open doorway. I allow myself a glance behind, noticing Van's eyes following us both as we duck outside. I quickly look away.
Lucy and Bob are sitting on a raised seating area directly in front of us and they both smile as we step outside, but to my surprise Johnny pulls me over in the opposite direction to a sheltered spot with low, comfy seats next to a glowing fire pit. A screen of foliage separates this area, hiding us both from view of everyone else and I wonder if it's intentional.
"Don't you want to sit with your friends?" I say, as we take a seat.
"Hmm... maybe later. Maybe I just wanna steal you away for a bit." The warm smile simmering on his lips makes my heart race and I grin back at him.
"Oh yeah?"
He nods, raising his glass and taking a sip, eyeing me over the rim. "Said I wanted to get to know you a bit better didn't I?"
I shift on the seat, relaxing my body and sitting back. Normally by now I'd be in full seduction mode, tilting myself forward to show an eyeful of cleavage, flicking my hair back, batting my eyelashes. It occurs to me that I don't feel the need to do any of this with Johnny though. I just know that he'd still have that same fondness in his eyes whether I was blatantly coming on to him or not.
"So... what d'ya wanna know?"
"Everything!" He grins. "Start from the beginning!"
"Okay!" I laugh, feeling uncharacteristically self-conscious at Johnny's interest. "So... as you know I'm Arabella Turner and I'm 19, I'm..."
"Hold up!" Johnny sits forward in his seat, his hand raised. "I didn't realise your last name was Turner. Was Arabella added as a coincidence or are your parents big Arctic Monkeys fans by any chance?"
"Oh yes!" I grin. "Well, my dad is anyway. My mum has awful taste in music. My dad... he got me into music... decent music... he loves Arctic Monkeys."
I trail off wistfully, remembering the more carefree times of my childhood when my dad used to perch me up on his shoulders and dance with me around the kitchen with the music on full blast. My mum with her hands over her ears shouting 'turn that rubbish down!' That was before their business ventures turned their focus elsewhere and they didn't have time for these precious family moments. The phrase 'the best things in life are free' flashes through my mind, but I blink any negative thoughts away. I'm supposed to be having fun.
"And Alex Turner's well fit!" I add, taking a large gulp of my drink.
Johnny grins. "So what other music do you like?"
"My dad always loved The Strokes too, so I grew up listening to them a lot as well."
Johnny nods an approval and I carry on. "I absolutely love Sam Fender too, he's gorgeous! And you know who else I've been listening to a lot recently? Inhaler. They're so cute, especially the bass player..."
I stop abruptly as I clock Johnny's obviously amused expression which he's trying to contain but not very successfully. "What? Don't you approve of my music taste?"
He shakes his head, laughing softly. "It's not that... do you only listen to music based on the attractiveness of band members?"
"Are you saying I'm shallow?" I challenge him, but jokingly so.
"Well, there does seems to be a correlation..."
I smirk, setting my now empty glass down on the floor at my feet and leaning over to him. "Well, if that's the case, maybe you'd like to ask me what I think of Catfish?"
"Go on then... I'm all ears."
He smiles teasingly, closing the small gap between us.
"We-ll..." I draw out the word, catching my lip in my bottom teeth and looking skywards like I'm pondering my next words. "There's this guitarist... and he's kinda hot..."
I wonder how hidden we are in this spot and how much we could get away with. I'm close now, my face only inches away from Johnny's.
"Tell me more," he murmurs, glancing down at my lips.
I lean in, closing my eyes...
"Bondy mate! How are ya?" The loud, brash Geordie voice blares out suddenly enough to make me physically jump, and I whip my head round in an instant to see who's interrupted our almost-kiss.
"Sam-fucking-Fender!" Johnny says excitedly, jumping up out of his seat. "How are ya man, how long's it been?"
Oh my god...
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drivers license - Tom Holland
Pairing: Tom x Singer!Reader
Requested? Nah
3,561 words
I was going to write this when the song came out, but as you observed, i wasn't writing bc i wasn't happy anymore. but here it is. enjoy.
Tom || Main || Taglist
* * * *
“I want you to meet my friend. She’s super nice and stuff. Maybe she could sing the soundtrack of one of my short films!” Harry said happily. “Anyway, she’s an amazing singer and she’s inviting me to the recording studio tomorrow. Want to come?”
Harry looked at Tom and waited for his response. The eldest Holland brother opened his mouth to say something, but Sam entered the room and interrupted. “Y/N’s my friend first, you know. I introduced her to YOU.” Sam rolled his eyes. “Besides, I suggested for her to invite you guys. Thank me later.”
“Thank you.” Harry mocked. “So, will you come with me-”
“Us.” Sam corrected. “Will you come with US tomorrow?”
“Yeah, I’ll come so both of you can shut up.” Tom laughed before scrolling through his phone again.
Tomorrow came and the three Hollands went to the recording studio where you were currently at. When they got there, you were in the booth recording your song which will be on your first EP. You were just starting in the music industry and you were still testing the waters and finding your sound.
The three men sat down on the couch and listened to you. It was safe to say that Tom immediately fell in love with your voice and he made a mental note to compliment your voice for when you’re done recording. After recording two songs, you were finally taking your break. As soon as you stepped out of the recording booth, Sam ran up to you and engulfed you in a tight hug.
“I missed you! You sounded amazing!” Sam said giddily. He was really happy and really proud of you.
“Thank you!” You said gratefully with a huge smile on your face. Sam was your first ever friend and he was your first audience. Needless to say, his opinions matter to you the most. He was more supportive than your family will ever be.
“I can’t believe my Christine will be doing great things on her own now.” Sam pouted. He called you ‘Christine’ and you earned that nickname because of Phantom of the Opera. You were his Christine and he was your Phantom. It was perfect.
“But I’ll always stay the same, Sam.” You said in pure honesty. You looked over his shoulder and saw two of his brothers.
“Hi, Harry!” You waved, recognizing his curly hair despite only meeting him five times. Harry waved back and that left Tom. He stood up and walked towards you and Sam to formally introduce himself.
“Hi, I’m Tom; Sam’s older brother.” He smiled sweetly. He offered his hand for you to shake and you gladly took it and gave it a firm shake.
“Nice to meet you. I’m Y/N.” You smiled before letting go of his hand.
“Your voice is just wow! You have a gift.” Tom complimented which made you shy. “Thank you.” You said sheepishly.
Sam cleared his throat, “So, lunch?”
The four of you had lunch at a small chicken wing restaurant. It was cheap, hidden, and there were only five other customers which was great. You talked about so many things and eventually, Tom asked about your friendship with Sam.
“Wait, how did you and Sam meet?” Tom asked, taking a bite of his chicken wing. You took a sip of your drink and swallowed your food before answering.
“I was homeschooled my whole life and when I told my mum that I wanted to enroll in a random course just to know what it feels like to have classmates, she enrolled me in a culinary course. Let’s just say that I’m surprised that I passed!” You and Sam laughed as you thought about the shit both of you did.
“We sat next to each other and we were cooking partners. She was so awkward!” Sam laughed, wiping a tear that escaped from his eye. “But I’m glad she was put in the seat next to me because if not, I wouldn’t have gotten to know her. I honestly wouldn’t have it any other way.”
“Same.” You nodded in agreement. “Sam’s my best friend in the whole world and I honestly wouldn’t know what to do without him. He’s my rock.”
Sam turned his head to look at you and smiled, “Same.”
“Ugh, just date already!” Harry said with his mouth full. He even rolled his eyes in the process.
“Ugh, just swallow already!” Sam mocked.
“That’s what she said.” You giggled. The table erupted with laughter and you were happy that you got to meet new people, thanks to Sam.
“I meant his food!” Sam breathed.
“It sounded wrong, though.” Tom chuckled.
“Very.” Harry said with a playful look on his face.
After lunch, Sam told you that they had to go home already. You were visibly upset because you haven’t seen your best friend in such a long time and you had so much fun with his brothers. It’s true what they say; time flies by when you’re having fun.
“I’ll call you tonight.” You told Sam. He nodded and said, “I shall wait for your call, then.” You hugged him and hugged Harry right after.
“It was nice seeing you again, Y/N!” Harry exclaimed before pulling away from the hug. “I’ll see you soon, okay?”
“Okay.” You nodded, already excited for your next meeting. You turned to hug Tom and not only did he hug you, but he also kissed your cheek which surprised you, Sam and Harry.
“I’d love to hang out with you again.” Tom said after hugging you. “But without these two divs.” He added earning a slap on the arm from each boy.
You quickly glanced at Sam and he just nodded for you to go. With that go signal, you turned to Tom and said, “Okay! I’ll give you my number and just text me later.”
Tom ended up texting you that night and he asked you out on a date. One date turned into two and two dates turned into three until both of you went on so many dates now. Despite the four year age gap, you two seemed to click. You didn’t have a label yet, though.
It all changed one night.
It was midnight and Tom decided that it’ll be fun to go on a spontaneous road trip. He picked you up and now you were on the road going God knows where. It was random, but it was really fun. Your parents were out of town, so you were confident in going with Tom on his road trip.
Both of your windows were down and you put your hand out to feel the wind. It was a great feeling. Tom was looking at you from time to time and he was smiling to himself. He stopped at a red light and you brought your hand back in again despite the fact that there were no cars around.
“I have a question.” Tom said, breaking the silence.
“Yeah?”
“Will you be my girlfriend?” He asked before driving again as the light turned green. You were surprised with his question and even more so when he started driving again.
Tom looked at you and saw your shocked face before turning to look at the road again. “I mean, you don’t have to answer now. Like, take your time. I just asked because I really li-”
“Yes.” You finally answered after being silent. He stepped on the brakes in shock and said, “What?”
“Yes, I’ll be your girlfriend.” You grinned. He chuckled and shook his head in disbelief, “Wow. The most amazing girl in the world is finally my girlfriend. It’s a great day already.”
That day was the start of a new chapter for both of you. Sam and Harry knew it would happen eventually. Harry was really happy, but Sam felt as though he was in between something; he was torn in between something. Little did he know, his hunch was right and he’ll soon find out why.
Tom was a great boyfriend. He made sure to think about your feelings before doing or saying anything, he made sure to include you on things because he knew you didn’t want to feel left out, he made sure to give you space when you would write songs, he picks you up all the time because you don’t know how to drive yet, but he didn’t mind; he loved it. Tom always told you that he loved you, he would send you memes that he knew would make your day, he tells you cheesy pick up lines and he would tell you jokes that catered to your humor which you greatly appreciated. In your eyes, he was perfect; he was your home.
For you, Tom was the one. He was the one you wanted to spend the rest of your life with and he told you the same thing. He said that when the time was right, he would propose and both of you would get married and he would give you the family you always wanted because your family didn’t really care about you and he hated that. You deserved the world and he promised you that both of you would have a family that’s so much different than yours.
Speaking of family, the Hollands loved you. They became your family. You and Nikki would have tea together and just gossip about things. You and Dom would joke around and Paddy would always challenge you in football. Harry just loved your presence and it came to a point where you would be his model whenever he wanted to take pictures. Tom would always whine and ask why Harry never asked him and Harry would say, “You’re the least interesting to look at.”
“Excuse me, what?!” Tom replied, pretending to be hurt. He knew Harry was just joking and quoting Kim Kardashian. “I’m the most handsome guy here.”
“Okay, Shrek.” Harry shrugged and continued taking your pictures.
Regardless of the sinking feeling that he felt, Sam was still happy that you found happiness in dating his brother. He did give you a go signal, after all.
Of course, all good things come to an end. In this case, your end came after dating for two years.
Tom was away filming for yet another movie and something in your gut told you that something was extremely wrong. You weren’t the jealous type, but every time you would FaceTime Tom, everything was off. The vibe was different and you didn’t like it.
The bad feelings you have solidified when it was revealed that Tom was starring in a film with a blonde girl who was the same age as him and she was gorgeous. You always felt that Tom might leave you for her and when you told Tom that, he assured you that nothing was going on and that you were crazy for even thinking about it.
It got to a point where both of you would always argue because of it. It got to a point where both of you avoided each other for a few days until Tom got back. He was outside your house and he texted for you to come and meet him by his car. You did and you didn’t know what to say. It was your first relationship after all.
Tom looked at you with his hands in his pockets, “I don’t think we should go on anymore.”
“What?” You asked, confused.
“We’re done, Y/N. It’s just not working anymore.” Tom explained. “You don’t trust me and we’re always fighting.”
“Wait, we’re not going to talk about this?” You asked him. He just shook his head. “So you’re willing to throw two years down the drain?”
“It’s just two years, Y/N. Get a grip, it’s not a divorce.” Tom huffed. “I have to go.” With that, he got in his car and drove away, leaving you standing there confused and hurt and feeling different kinds of emotions.
You figured that everything was just a nightmare and that when you wake up the next day, everything’s fine. Of course, you were wrong. When you woke up the next day, Tom blocked your number and on social media and it broke your heart. Then when you went on Twitter, Tom Holland was trending because apparently, he’s dating the blonde girl he told you not to worry about. You were still in denial, but when you called Sam, he just told you not to bother his brother.
“It’s true, isn’t it? He left me for her.” You said with a hoarse voice. Sam was silent on the other line. You could only hear his breathing. “Hello?” You called out.
“Y/N, I have to go.” Sam said softly.
You bitterly chuckled, “I lost him and now, I lost you. This is fun.”
“It’s not like that. I just don’t want to get in the middle of-”
“It’s okay, I get it. He’s your brother. Don’t be sorry or anything. Thanks for the years of friendship, Sam. I’ll forever treasure it. Thank you, truly.” You said before hanging up, not waiting for him to respond. Unbeknownst to you, Sam was extremely hurt for being part of the reason why you’re hurting. He removed the phone from his ear and looked at it. Tom cleared his throat causing Sam to look at him.
“Was that Y/N?” Tom asked. Sam nodded. “What did she say? What did you tell her?” Tom asked again.
“I told her not to bother you and just like that, our friendship is over. So, I hope you’re happy.” Sam frowned as tears clouded his vision.
Tom scoffed, “You don’t need her. You have so many friends. Plus, you have me. Anyway, get dressed. We’re going to the pub.” Tom left Sam’s room. Sam sighed and wiped his tears. He felt terrible.
As for you, in the span of twenty-four hours, you lost your best friend and the man you loved most in the whole world.
You’re currently crying tears of joy because your new song played on the radio and it’s your first time hearing it. Your whole team was really proud of you and they were your new friends and family now. Ever since your break up with Tom, they were there for you. They helped you get back on your feet until you were ready to write another song.
The said song is now playing on the radio and is being streamed by millions.
“Congrats, Y/N!” Your manager, Anya, said. “We’re all so proud of you!”
“Thank you.” You sniffed and wiped your tears.
Your song received good reviews and it’s included in Billboard’s Top 100. Every talk show host wanted you on their show for you to perform your hit single. Everyone wanted to talk to you about the song. Anya made it all happen. You were booked left and right and all the blessings were just coming in. You were extremely happy.
On the other hand, Tom knew the song was about him and it annoyed him because everywhere he went, your song was playing. Even Sam plays it a lot. It was clear that Sam missed you, but he made his bed and he has to lay in it.
“Guess what.” Harry said.
“What?” Tom asked.
“Y/N’s nominated for an award and she’s going to the award show you’re going to.” Harry announced which made Tom groan. “Also, people somehow figured out that the song is about you and now they’re assuming things and they want to know the story, especially your side.” Harry added.
“Easy.” Sam piped up. “Just tell them you left her for another girl and you dated the said girl right after you broke up with Y/N.”
“Shut up, Sam.” Tom hissed. Sam looked at Tom with a blank expression and said, “You don’t have the right to be angry after what you did to her.”
“Why are you defending her now? Why not a few months ago when it was still fresh?” Tom retorted.
“Because I didn’t want to get in the middle of your mess and I still care about her. Unlike you, I can’t just throw years of friendship away.” Sam said before leaving the living room.
“Yikes.” Harry said after Sam left. “Anyway, you have to act like it doesn’t bother you, so it’s not an issue.”
The day of the awards show finally came and you were nervous. It was your first time performing for an extremely huge audience and it made you anxious. The red carpet was all a blur and at one point you saw Sam and both of you made eye contact. You gave him a tight-lipped smile and he did the same. What he did still hurts you, but you wanted to let go of that part of your life now.
When it was your time to perform, your phone buzzed and a notification from a number appeared. You have deleted Sam’s contact number, but you memorized his number in case of emergencies.
“Good luck on your performance, my Christine. I’m proud of you.” He wrote.
You smiled a bit before locking your phone and giving it to your manager. Somehow, it was comforting to know that Sam still had your number and that he was still supporting you despite what happened. You walked on stage and began singing your heart out. The crowd loved it and it made you happy.
“She’s so good!” Sam exclaimed as he clapped for you.
“Please, she sounds like the other artists here. She’s not special.” Tom said as he plastered a fake smile on his face. Harry scoffed and said, “Yeah, right. You fell in love with her voice the first time you met her. Don’t lie.”
Tom never responded to that and kept his mouth shut.
An hour later, the category you were nominated for was up and it made you nervous. You believed you weren’t going to win because the other nominees were well known singers. But for some miracle, you won and the camera panned to Tom to see his reaction.
He wore a fake smile as he clapped. It was awkward. It was even more awkward when you walked past him and Sam stood up to grab your hand to say a quick ‘congrats’ which you thanked him for before walking to the stage to accept your first award ever.
“Wow, I can’t believe this. I want to thank my whole team for being so supportive and patient with me!” You smiled as you accepted the award. “Thank you to the amazing fans for their undying love and support. I wouldn’t have done it without you guys.”
“Lastly, I want to thank the guy who inspired the song.” You said as the camera panned to Tom again. “You know who you are and without you, there would be no songs or albums or EPs. You were the soundtrack of my love life and I’m beginning to accept that you’re not that person anymore. Thank you for everything and I hope that with this song, I can finally let go and start fresh.”
“Thank you again!” You said before leaving the stage. The people clapped for you except for Tom who just sat there with an expression no one could read.
You never interacted with Tom or his family the whole night and somehow, you were grateful for that. You never got a text from Sam anymore, but you did get a text from Tom’s new number a few days later asking for you two to meet in the place where you went on the spontaneous road trip to God knows where.
You drove up there with your new car and when you arrived, Tom was already there waiting for you. You parked and got out of the car before walking towards him.
“Hello.” You said, breaking the silence.
“Hi.” He said. “I figured we need to talk for closure.”
“Ahh. Yes, please.” You nodded.
“I don’t know where to start.” Tom admitted.
“Maybe start with the reason why you just left me.” You said bluntly.
“I just didn’t feel the spark anymore, okay? I grew feelings for someone else and I wanted to do it right without cheating, so I broke up with you and-”
“And got together with her the next day.” You finished for him. “Amazing, Tom. Really.” He didn’t say anything else anymore and you nodded and took this as your cue to leave. But before that you called out to him. He turned to look at you and you said, “Just know that I never lacked in our relationship. I’m just sorry that I actually believed that you were the one for me and I’m sorry that I believed what you said. I wish you all the best, Thomas. I do. You’re a great actor and I know your own blessings are still coming in.”
“Thank you.” He said. “You’re a great singer.”
You gave him a small smile and got in your car and drove away. The drive back hits differently because you remembered laughing with Tom as if the road trip happened yesterday, but it didn’t. You shook off the thoughts with a chuckle and just kept driving. You were finally letting go to start a new chapter in your life.
* * * *
who wants to see the soc med of this?
𝐍𝐄𝐖 𝐓𝐎𝐌 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @blueleatherbag @cocoamoonmalfoy @thatforgottenangel @parkerpeter24 @turtoix @slutforsr @givebuckyhisplumsnow @buckys-little-hoe @runawayolives @chewymoustachio @hollandsrecs @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @yourstrulyamour @juliediggory @lharrietg @alexx-stancati @rumplebutterbaby @dummiesshort @spideyspeaches @thevelvetseries @buckymylove @quxxnxfhxll @marvelsimps @dreamy-clousds @bora-world @hunnybunimdun @supred12
𝐍𝐄𝐖 𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐋 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @holland-styles @trustfundparker @calltothewild @felicityparkers @hufflepuffprincess24 @tommysparker @justasmisunderstoodasloki @quaksonhehe @call-me-baby-gir1 @itstaskeen @theonly1outof-a-billion @lost-in-the-stars03 @justafangirlduh @piscesparker @speedymaximoff @miraclesoflove @lexirv @blairscott @getbywithasmile @pqrkerr @lavender-writer @blackbat2020 @hoodpankow
#tom holland#tom holland one shots#tom holland angst#tom holland x reader#tom holland x y/n#in-a-lot-of-fandoms-tbh
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project: dance, dance, revolution
summary - you hate that ai robots are beginning to take over the entertainment industry, but you have no choice than to help them. but what if it all didn't turn out to be what you thought it was?
pairing - johnny and fem!reader
genre - strangers-to-lovers!au, robot!au, comedy, fluff
word count - 10.101
warnings - cw! food, there might be some grammatical errors... i'm depending on grammarly on this one
author's note - this is for @pastelsicheng's ai project #14320 collab! this was honestly such a challenge for me since i have been in a writing slump for over two years i believe, but i'm glad it gave me the push i need. i am still super rusty, but i think the dialogue is cute, so i'm happy with it! thank you so much emmy for sharing your great idea with everyone, and i hope you all like it!
************************************************************************
Johnny AI AU - seoloquent
Kun was terrified.
Despite experiencing your various emotions throughout the five years of being your manager, he has never seen you this angry before. But, honestly speaking, he couldn’t blame you. He’d be just as mad if he found out his boss went behind his back and signed a contract with a company he hated. As much as he could sympathize with you though, Kun just couldn’t get himself to understand why you were so upset about working with LSM Incorporated. If he were in your shoes, he’d be doing backflips off the wall! The amount of exposure, and revenue you are potentially going to be receiving… Kun just does not understand what the problem is.
Although your strides were long and strong, Kun was able to keep up with you while making sure he kept his distance, as if a dark cloud followed behind you. As cautious as he was to not have you blow up at him, he still tried to convince you to not make a scene within the conference room by his desperate protests; in which you kindly ignored. Every single word that left his mouth went through one ear and straight out the other as you paid him no mind. You were in a tunnel vision; the only person you wanted to talk to right now was your boss.
Pushing the door open with much force (that Kun had to catch before it slammed onto the wall behind it), you caught the attention of the CEO of your company, as well as Lee Soo Man of LSM Inc. They flashed pleasant smiles your way, completely oblivious of your angry state.
“Y/N, just the person we wanted to se-”
“Are you serious?!” You slammed the contract papers down on the table, your eyes wide and fierce as they stared into your boss’s eyes.
Your emotions were still fresh from when you first received the signed contract papers from Kun about an hour prior. The feelings of betrayal and violation lingered within you, and the uneasiness it caused made you sick. How could someone lack so much human decency that they justified going behind their employee’s back, an employee that has their trust in them at that, and force them into labor; which they have already voiced that they did not want to do? It baffled you, and you were hurt, as you believed that you and your CEO had a great business relationship. But he took that open communication for granted and took advantage of you.
After realizing that you stormed in with anger rather than excitement, he pursed his lips and looked down at the papers, chuckling to himself. “Oh. So you’re still opposed to the idea.”
You couldn’t believe your ears. “Of course I am!” Your voice rose as your eyes grew bigger. “You never talked to me about it again after the first time; what made you think that I changed my mind?”
“Y/N, I have to get you to notice that you are not the only one signed to this company. This will not only be good exposure for you, but for us as well.” He justified. He kept his voice calm, not only to calm you down but also to keep a professional demeanor in front of his newly established business partner.
“Oh, so you’re doing this for yourself?”
“Of course not! This is for the benefit of not only you, not only me, but for the company as a whole.” Your CEO reasoned. Before you could respond, he cleared his throat and turned to Lee Soo Man. “I’m sorry, but will you excuse us for a moment? I don’t feel comfortable having this conversation in front of you as our partner.”
Normally, you would be embarrassed that you presented this side of yourself in front of a potential partner, but embarrassed in front of Lee Soo Man? You care more about a monkey’s opinion about yourself more than his opinion. Besides, it doesn’t seem like he’s phased by your reaction at all. Strangely enough, when you turned toward the founder of LSM Inc., you realized that his arrogant smile had never left his face since the moment you stormed into the conference room. It gave you chills. He seems so artificial that you wouldn’t be surprised if he turned out to be a robot himself.
After Lee Soo Man gave his, “No problem,” your boss stood up from his seat and escorted you both outside the conference room. The moment the door closed, your boss’s true emotion started to show. His eyes grew wide and his fingers grabbed onto his freshly trimmed strands as he breathed out a heavy breath of frustration. Equally as frustrated, if not more, you crossed your arms and made sure your gaze was unwavering; something you needed to learn after being manipulated many times from past experiences with people who work within the entertainment industry. You stepped your metaphoric foot down. Even if your boss had signed a contract without your acknowledgment, you were not going to do the job. That’s not your signature on the papers.
“Are you crazy Y/N?!” He yelled in a hushed tone, careful to not have anyone overhear your conversation. “How could you act like that in front of him?”
“Do I not have a right to be angry? You sold me away to a robot company Jack, a robot company!” You slapped the back of your hand on your other palm, now physically unable to withhold your emotions.
“I didn’t sell you away, you’re getting paid to do this job.” He spat. Now self-aware of how uncivil and unprofessional he was being, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath to ease his nerves. You are going to get nowhere if you bickered like this, and if you keep it up, he knows he is going to say something he regrets.
Now keeping his tone soft, he revealed, “I chose you because you’re the best for this job.”
“Aren’t there other artists under this label who could do this? I’m sure they’re more willing to work with LSM than I am.” You matched his tone, hoping that this time you could get through to him.
“Those other artists can’t produce the same product as you can.” Jack shook his head disapprovingly. “Listen Y/N, I don’t want to waste any more of Mr. Lee’s time, so I’m going to make this short. I apologize in advance if you find any offense in this, but business is business.” You stared intently into his eyes, in hopes to understand where he was going with his next sentence, but his expression could not be read.
“If you can’t do this job, then I’m afraid that I’ll have to drop you from this label.”
You never knew what people meant by having their hearts drop down to their stomachs until now. You felt as if the wind was knocked out of you, your breath short and shaky and your knees weak. All these years… all this work you put in to make a name not only for yourself but for this company… it baffled you that all that effort could be thrown away so easily, just because of some AI company.
As much as you wanted to keep standing up for yourself and your role in the company, you knew there was no use. Your boss didn’t seem to give you a choice either, seeing that he walked back into the conference room shortly after his bombshell. The only thing you could find yourself doing is laughing bitterly to yourself while shaking your head. What in the world are you going to do now?
***
Maybe it isn’t such a good idea to go to a bar when you’re in a bad mood. The constant noise of chatter and the clinking of glasses did not soothe your nerves one bit. Rather, it made you even more annoyed, and on the brink of yelling out at everyone to just be quiet. Instead of making a fool of yourself in public though, you sat with your head under your arms, forehead resting on the cool surface of the bar. Kun, your designated moral support, sat next to you, tapping his glass of whiskey as he thought of what to say to you.
“So, what are you gonna do?”
That simple yet oh so effective sentence had you throwing your head back and releasing a loud groan. Your reaction had your manager shrugging, his face reading, ‘What did I do?’ You rested your cheeks on the palms of your hands as you thought: ‘What can I do?’
Gazing off into a space of nothing, you replied: “I dunno.” You shook your head, your hands still on either side of your face as you deadpanned. “I have no idea what I’m gonna do.” After a moment, something clicked in your head, and you set your arms down and turned to Kun. “Do you want to bail on them and start a company with me?”
He snorted at the inquiry. “You know we can’t do that! At least not right now. It’s way too last minute.”
You looked down at your arms with a sad expression and sighed. “You’re right.” Not only would it be an impulsive decision, but you had no motivation in you to own a whole entertainment company. “What am I gonna do?!” You cried out, your hands covering your face to hide your shame.
“Hey, hey, hey! Stop the whining!” Kun took your hands away from your face, revealing the pout on your face. “Everything is going to be fine! I’m sure of it.”
Kun, a big pep-talk kind of man, was always ready to reassure you when you were in doubt. And boy was he good at it. You still remember when you were growing anxious before your first big concert at an arena. The staff ran around the whole place frantically trying to find where you ran off to. Thankfully, your trustee manager was able to find your hiding spot, which was beside a vending machine in an empty hallway. His comforting words found a way to ease your speedy heart rate, and clear up your clogged mind. After that day, you knew you could always go to him when you were feeling down or unsure of yourself. He’s a friend you could always lean on.
“How are you so sure?” You asked, your voice so small that he almost missed the question.
“Think about it,” he set his glass to the side and folded his hands together, “this contract is only valid for six months. It’s not like you’re going to be working there forever.”
You couldn’t help but roll your eyes. “I know that; but still! I don’t want to do it at all!”
“You never know what will happen until you try though! You might end up liking it.” He nudged your elbow as he flashed a convincing smile.
“Me? Liking it?” You scoffed. “Kun, do you even know me?”
He pursed his lips and sighed. This situation was foreign to him since he always knew what to say. But now, it seemed like everything he was saying was making the situation worse. He wanted nothing more than for you to feel comfortable, but that mission is basically impossible knowing how much you oppose the AI industry. But still, Kun is a persistent man. He wasn’t going to back down just yet.
Finally, something clicked.
“Actually, your idea doesn’t sound half bad.” You cocked a curious eyebrow, surprised that he brought up something you spurted out carelessly. “Think about it: you’re still your own person. Even though you’re technically bound by a contract doesn’t mean that you can’t make a decision on your own. He did give you the choice to leave.”
You furrowed your eyebrows. “So you’re saying that I should just leave the company?”
He shook his head. “No. What I’m doing is offering a deal. I want you to try to work with LSM for at least three months. If you try it, you might like it! If not, I will quit with you, and we can try to start a company on our own; which I know we both don’t want. But hey, that might be fun too.”
You thought about the proposal for a moment. It wasn’t too much of a bad idea. It was actually quite reasonable. Yeah, you aren’t looking forward to being surrounded by robots and their arrogant creators, but you guess that it’s worth a try. Just for the experience at least.
“I think we have a deal.” You held your hand out.
He took your hand in his and gave it a firm shake.
“Pleasure doing business with you, partner.”
***
You shivered upon entering the entertainment wing of LSM Inc. You were told that the lab would be a bit chilly, which is why you brought a jacket with you, but the cool air still found a way to nip at your skin through the material. You have to say, the lab was not what you expected it to be. Rather than it being some cold, plain science lab, it was made out to be much more casual. Your eyes settled on what looked like a lounge area for the employees, and you watched carefully as they conversed with one another with soft smiles on their faces. Scanning the place even further, you came across capsule areas, in which you assume where the AI robots stayed. As cool as the dome building seemed, you still couldn’t shake off the grudge you had against the company.
“Oh, you’re here!” A man holding a clipboard exclaimed. He ran over to you and Kun, flashing a bright smile. “Mr. Lee told me that we were to be expecting you both. I was hoping to greet you at the main lobby entrance, but I got caught up in another situation, so I apologize. My name is Kim Doyoung, I’ll be your guide for the day.” He politely held his hand out, and you shook it while replying with a small, “Hello.”
“We’re pleased to have you here with us Ms. Y/N. Please, follow me.” He motioned both of you to follow him. “I must say, I’m a huge fan of your music. I’m really happy that you decided to work with us for the next comeback.”
“Oh. Don’t mention it.” You shook your head while smiling slightly.
As Doyoung lead you to wherever he was leading you, he pointed out different areas to help you grow familiar with the lab. You learned that they have many recording and dance studios like regular companies do. You couldn’t help but wonder why, since they could just be programmed to sing the songs, but you didn’t bother to ask.
Finally, Doyoung stopped at a station, but his bright expression was replaced by a puzzled one. He looked around as if he were looking for someone. You, on the other hand, couldn’t help but stare at what stood before you. The tall human-like… thing, stared right back at you with a neutral expression. It gave you chills how real he seemed; like he could walk past you on the street and you wouldn’t bat an eye. Despite how anxious it made you feel, your curiosity outweighed that emotion, and you inched closer to get a better look.
Your tour guide caught you eyeing the bot, and that smile found its way back onto his face. He heard that you might be a bit opposed to working with the AI’s, so he was glad to find you expressing some sort of interest in their prized possession.
“He’s so human-” As if in a trance, you reached out a hand to touch the robot, but it suddenly stepped back just before you got to it.
“I’m sorry, but physical touch is not allowed unless permitted.” The robot announced before flashing a commercial smile.
Doyoung’s chuckled beside you. “For the safety of our bots, we have prohibited anyone from touching them.” He leaned in to add, “Too many fans at fansigns got touchy-feely.” He shook his head disapprovingly.
“Eager to get a feel of my bot already?” You heard a voice from behind you.
When you turned around, you felt as though you got whiplash. The man standing behind you looked identical to the robot standing before you. The only difference was that the robot had blonde short hair and was styled in fancy clothing whilst the man had long brown hair and didn’t seem to care much about what he had on. He had his hands in the pockets of his gray sweatpants, a sly smirk plastered on his face.
“You’re late.” Doyoung deadpanned.
“I’m not late, I was taking a nap in the Pod, and nobody cared enough to wake me up!” The mystery man shrugged.
Finally, you snapped back into reality, but you still had to verify that what you were seeing was real. When you finally accepted what was going on, you couldn’t help but laugh.
“How cute.” You snickered to yourself.
A puzzled expression masked the mystery man’s face. “What’s cute?”
“What is this? The Man and the Muppet?” Your comment had Kun nudging your arm and shooting you a warning look to which you responded with an apologetic gaze.
Not giving the mystery man any time to respond (merely because he does not have the patience), Doyoung spoke up. “This is Suh Youngho, he’s the head AI Developer of our department. He’s the creator of #S127.” Youngho put his hands behind his back and bowed as his greeting.
“I’m guessing his name is Youngho as well?” You pointed to the robot, still standing expressionless.
“He wishes, but no, we call him Johnny!” Youngho swung an arm over his identical twin of a robot, smiling brightly. “After a long and hard fight for it, he will be releasing his first solo album this year.” He wiped a fake tear from under his eye. “Johnny here is my firstborn, so this is going to be really special.”
“And you’re going to help us make it very special!” Doyoung cheered.
“Actually, speaking of that, what exactly am I supposed to be doing? Wouldn’t it just be easier for me to give you guys a demo and you program him to sing it or something?” You asked.
Doyoung was quick to answer. “That would defeat the purpose of AI robots actually! The thing is, they’re supposed to learn to adapt to certain environments, like we do! So they learn how to sing songs and how to dance complex choreography just like we do.”
This time, Kun was the one to ask a question. “Aren’t you guys just putting more work upon yourself?”
“Yes, and no,” Youngho started, “It’s like a domino effect. The more work we give our bots means more research that needs to be done. The more research that is done, means there’s more data we get. The more data we get means a more refined bot, and then it loops.” Kun opened his mouth in an ‘ah’ shape and nodded his head after the explanation. “Hopefully we can get this bad boy to the point where we don’t have to do any more research and he can be a successful artist on his own.”
Even though this was all very interesting, you still couldn’t help but still be opposed to the thought of helping a robot making it in the entertainment industry. You caught a glimpse of the future as you fell into a daydream: AI’s getting a full sweep in wins at big music award shows, discrediting those who actually put their heart and soul into their work. Robots don’t have a heart, nor do they have a soul. Even if they do seem to “work hard,” they will never be on the same level as a human artist. It just won’t be fair, but what even is fair these days?
“So, to answer your question, we need Johnny to learn what it’s like to be a true singer-slash-songwriter. And to achieve that, he’ll be staying with you for the duration of the six months before his solo debut.” Doyoung’s words snapped you out of your daydream and you turned to him with furrowed brows.
“Oh, so this is going to be like ‘Take your robot to work day’ or something? But just for six months instead?” You questioned.
Doyoung looked up as he thought, nodding and shrugging seconds afterward. “Well, yes, but we were hoping that Johnny could get the full package. We planned for him to stay with you 24/7 so that he could really get a feel of your creative process.”
You did a double-take, eyes wide and mouth agape showcasing your shock.
“E-Excuse me? You mean to say that he will be… living with me?” You spoke low and slow, scared of the obvious answer.
You didn’t see anything about this in the contract papers; not that you read it anyway since you weren’t the one who signed them; but still! You could feel your heart race as you thought of him living in your apartment, those brown soulless eyes studying every move you made. The vision made you shudder.
“Affirmative.” Youngho nodded firmly.
Your heart wanted to burst out of your chest. “I’m sorry, but can you guys excuse us for a moment? I need to speak with my manager in private.” You said just before taking Kun’s hand and dragging him somewhere where the two scientists wouldn’t be able to hear your conversation.
“I’m living with the robot?!” You whisper yelled, careful to not have anyone nearby hear your anguish.
“In my defense, I had no idea about this.” Kun shook his head with his hands up.
You paced back and forth as you panicked. You lifted your hands, but not knowing what to do with them, you just clenched them into a fist. It seemed like your life was spiraling out of your control. Nothing is going your way, and it is driving you insane. You need to get your life back in order fast. If not, who knows what will happen?
“I swear, if he wasn’t the one paying me, I would kill Jack right now.” You grumbled.
“Hey, it’s not like Johnny is a real guy. I doubt he would try to do anything to hurt you.” Kun tried his best to reassure you, but it was not doing much to help.
“You don’t know that! We don’t know what those guys are capable of!” You pointed toward Doyoung and Youngho. “That Doyoung guy is nice, but I don’t know if I can trust him. And Youngho seems like he’s gonna be a handful.” You stared at the said man as he and Doyoung bickered, probably about him being late again.
Kun turned his head to see the two men bickering, and the only thing he could do was chuckle. “I think they should be the least of your worries.” His comment made you sigh deeply. “You’ll be fine, I promise you!” He put his hands on your arms to steady you, but you avoided his gaze as you stared down at your feet with a pout on your face. “You know I’m always on speed dial if you need me.”
You nodded your head, still avoiding his gaze.
“Hey,” his call made your eyes meet his. “If all goes wrong, we can always dump a bucket of water over ‘em.”
You couldn’t help but laugh at the comment. “Yeah, and then we’ll get sued and possibly go to jail.”
Kun smacked his lips and said, “Eh, I’m sure they’ll be able to fix the guy. A little water can’t do that much damage.” He stepped back and shoved his hands into his pockets. After a small moment of silence, he kicked your shoe gently. “So what do you say? You’re still gonna do it, or no?”
A groan erupted from your chest, and you brought your hands down your face out of frustration. You really don’t want to do this, but a deal is a deal.
“Three months. I’m giving three months.”
“That’s my girl!”
***
You found yourself pacing around your apartment in the early morning. It has been about a week since you first spoke with LSM Inc. From this day forward for the next six months (or three months you hoped), Johnny would be shadowing you at all times. You were a nervous wreck since you didn’t know what to expect from living with a robot. What if he suddenly malfunctioned and they blamed it on you? You can’t handle this type of responsibility. Or what if he malfunctioned and started acting violently toward you?
“Snap out of it!” You whisper yelled at yourself, hitting your temple with your knuckles. You always tend to scare yourself when you’re nervous. Everyone you have spoken to about this matter has told you that you had nothing to worry about, so you made it your goal to not worry. But why is it so hard?
DING!
You swore your heart jumped out of your chest when your doorbell suddenly sounded throughout your home. As much as you wanted your heart rate to calm down, it only began to race faster the closer you got to your door. When your hand touched the gold knob, you closed your eyes and took a deep breath, then you finally opened the door.
Two identical men stood before you, flashing the same bright smile.
“Good morning to you!” Youngho greeted you cheerfully, to which you replied with a dazed “Morning,” before allowing them inside.
You eyed the two men as they entered your living room, confused as to why they were the only ones here. “Where is Mr. Kim?”
Youngho cocked an eyebrow before turning around to face you. “Who?”
“Your coworker. Doyoung, I believe his name is?” You answered.
“Oh!” He let out a hearty laugh. “You don’t have to call him that, it makes him sound old. And I’m older than him, so that kind of hurts my feelings.” He joked, but the only thing you could find yourself doing was nodding your head and looking away.
Sensing your discomfort, he cleared his throat before answering your question. “He’s busy back at the lab. I’m here to make sure John is all set before I leave him in your care.” You winced at his words. It only added to the overwhelming weight on your shoulders.
“Why do you ask? Did you grow fond of him already?” He slung his backpack from around his shoulder onto the floor. You peeked inside when he zipped it open, finding wires bunched inside.
“Uh, no, I wouldn’t say that.” You let out a nervous laugh. “I just find it a bit overwhelming with only you two here.”
A smirk grew on his face. “So, you’re overwhelmed by my great looks huh?” He flipped his hair and shrugged as if it was inevitable to be starstruck by him.
“I look exactly like you,” Johnny spoke for the first time since entering your home.
You had to hold back a laugh at the sudden comment, and Youngho’s reaction didn’t make it any easier.
“So? You’re inspired by me, so therefore I take the credit of our looks!” He stuck his nose up in Johnny’s face. When the scientist turned back toward you, he realized you were holding back a laugh as your pursed your lips and looked away. “What? You find this funny?”
You put your hand up and shook your head. “No, no.”
Youngho was happy to find you in a better mood than when you first met. Sure, you’re still on the shy side, but at least you’re laughing instead of frowning like the first time. He heard that you weren’t exactly on board with working with LSM, so he made it his goal to have this be an enjoyable experience for you. He hopes that one day your negative opinions about AI’s would change. They’re as special to him as music is to you.
“I need to set up Johnny’s things. Is it okay if you tell me where he’s allowed to sleep?” Youngho asked.
You tilted your head to the side, a puzzled expression finding its way on your face. “He sleeps?”
“Yeah!” Youngho nodded simply. “It’s like setting your computer on sleep mode. Machines need rest as much as we do. Johnny here is a hardworking man, he deserves to sleep.”
You supposed he was right. He might break easier if his gears were running constantly. Plus, he was made to function as a human, but you didn’t know that it was to this extent. To say the least, you were impressed at the attention to detail.
You motioned the two to your guest bedroom, and immediately Youngho got to work. Johnny stood next to you as the both of you spectated Youngho’s work, but you were shortly distracted by the robot.
You peered up at the tall machine with a curious gaze, and he turned to you with a kind smile.
“So, I’m not sure if this is an inappropriate question or not, but I’m curious.” Johnny nodded for you to go on. “Should I, like… talk to you like Siri? Or can I talk to you like a normal person?”
You were startled to hear Youngho’s loud snort in the corner of the room, but instead of him being the one to answer, Johnny did.
“You can talk to me like a normal person, don’t worry.” Johnny shook his head. “If it makes you comfortable, you can view me as a human if you’d like. I’m not that much different than you actually. We’re just wired differently.”
“Hey,” Youngho’s stern voice caught both of your attention. “Be proud of who you are, whether you are a human or robot. We’ve been through this John.”
Johnny nodded. “Right, right. My apologies.”
Youngho hated it when Johnny tried to tell others to view him as a human. Not because he believed that Johnny was trying to fool people, but because being a robot is his identity, and he should be proud of that. Sure, it’s not likely that Johnny could feel the feeling of pride, but Youngho could tell that Johnny was insecure. It worried him, but he didn’t want to tap into his database to change anything since he wants Johnny to be as authentic as possible. So for now, Youngho is keeping track of Johnny’s growth as an AI person.
Soon, Youngho was finished with setting up Johnny’s station. In the corner of the guestroom stood a white podium with a screen built in the middle of it. He let out a deep breath of satisfaction as he stepped back and dusted his hands off.
Before you could ask what it was, Youngho was already answering your unspoken question. “This is Johnny’s Communication Center. Every night he’ll have to transfer data from his system so that we’ll know what he’s been up to and see if he’s made any improvements. That’s if he’s not with me at the lab.” Suddenly, his face grew serious. “For legal reasons, I have to let you know that this station is strictly off-limits. There’s confidential information in here that belongs to LSM Inc.”
Even though you were curious, the last thing you wanted to do was get involved with the law, so you took note of his warning. Hopefully, it isn’t something regarding the invasion of privacy.
You shook your head before you could scare yourself even further. Positive thoughts. Think positive thoughts.
“Alright, on that note, I think my work here is done!” Youngho announced. “Can I talk with you in private?” He asked suddenly, pointing a finger at you.
“Me?” You had to double-check whether he was really talking to you or not. He chuckled as he nodded his head, confirming your wonders. “Oh, okay.”
You followed the man out of the room, leaving Johnny to check out the place he’ll be living in for the next few months.
After the two of you reached your living room, Youngho began to speak. “Hey, so, I really want to thank you for working with us on this project. I heard that you’re not the biggest fan of AI’s, so I was surprised to hear you signed the contract.”
You held back from rolling your eyes as the memories of your boss came up. “It’s not like I really had a choice.” You smiled softly and shook your head.
He tilted his head in confusion. “What do you mean by that?”
You tensed up when you realized what you just said. As much as you did not want to do this job, you made it your goal to remain as professional as possible for the sake of your reputation. After working in the entertainment industry for some years, you learned to keep your personal feelings apart from your job. If- no, when you do end up quitting the job after three months, at least LSM won’t be able to say anything negative about you.
Refraining from explaining yourself, you shook your head once more. “Nevermind what I said. Johnny will be safe in my care!”
Youngho pouted, his eyes scanning your face. He wanted you to elaborate, but he had no time to talk further. He needed to get back to the lab.
“Well, I hope so. Call me if you need anything. I need to get going.”
Nodding, you waved goodbye to him before seeing him off. Your feet ended up taking you back to your guest bedroom, where you found Johnny sitting at the end of the bed, staring at the wall in front of him. You caught his attention after you cleared your throat, and instead of staring at you with that lifeless gaze, he smiled brightly.
You mustered up the courage to walk up to him, still stopping some feet away though. Crossing your arms, you tried to think of what to say. While you thought, he examined your face, trying his best to read your expression so he to could come up with something to talk about. The silence was awkward for you, but Johnny never sensed the discomfort. He was happy to be here with you. You are the gold coin on his road to success, so he decided to cherish you.
“So… it’s quite early and I usually don’t head to the studio until the evening. Is there anything you wanted to do?” You asked.
“There isn’t anything I can think of…” he shrugged his shoulders.
Suddenly, your stomach grumbled and your hand covered it as a reflex. You were so nervous this morning that you didn’t have much of an appetite, but hunger was catching up to you now.
“I didn’t have breakfast yet.” You laughed nervously. “Are you… able to eat anything?” You felt weird asking such a question since he’s a robot after all, but who knows what he can and cannot do? Technology is so advanced these days. Besides, isn’t he made to live like a human anyway?
In all truthfulness though, Johnny isn’t allowed to eat-- sometimes. In special cases, he can nibble on a snack, but eating a full course meal was a no-go. But Johnny was aware of your discomfort of being with him, and he was determined to make you feel the opposite. As long as he doesn’t clog his gears, taking the risk should be okay.
“I know of this breakfast house Youngho likes to go to every now and then. Do you want to go there?”
Your face lit up at the suggestion. You were more excited at the thought of being around others rather than eating. Being in the house alone with Johnny was really starting to suffocate you, and you needed out immediately. Maybe some fresh air and being surrounded by humans will make you feel somewhat better.
The two of you were quick to leave the apartment after you accepted the offer. Johnny led the way to the restaurant, and on your way, he let you know that it was not far from your home. Come to find out, it was within walking distance. You wondered how you never noticed the humble breakfast house, but after thinking about it for a while, you realized that you are always on the go. Ever since you moved to your apartment, you never took the time to stop and get to know your surroundings.
“What’s wrong?” Johnny’s question snapped you out of your thoughts.
“Huh? Oh… nothing, just thinking.” Finally, you noticed that you were standing in front of the restaurant. “Let’s head inside.”
Surprisingly, Johnny was easy to talk to. Even though he had somewhat awkward responses to your questions, it was never boring or dry. You got to know about his life in the lab, and even how Youngho decided to grow his hair out because people mistook him for Johnny so many times. His story was so interesting, and it kept you on your toes, itching to hear more. It was beyond what you could ever imagine.
“So what is your goal?” You suddenly asked.
He tilted his head in curiosity. “Can you elaborate for me please?”
“You know, like what’s your goal as a singer? Or even just as a living being?”
He sat back in his seat as he pondered on the simple, yet deep question. It’s something he’s never had time to think about. Actually, it’s something he never considered thinking about. Ever since he was first powered up, he has always been working. But working towards what, is the question he began to ask himself.
“I… honestly don’t know.” He shook his head after moments of thinking.
“Really?” Your eyes grew wide at his response. “If that’s the case, then why do you expect to learn how to write music? You need to have some desire or passion to do so.”
He crossed his arm over his chest and rested his chin on his other hand. “I guess you’re right… But how do I find out what my goal is?”
You shrugged your shoulders. “What are you living for? What’s your purpose? You have to ask yourself these types of questions.”
It worried Johnny that he didn’t have a passion despite calling himself a music artist. But he knew he needed to figure it out fast because he really does want to be successful in this field. But is there anything really to work for being the person he is?
***
The next day, you were back at the lab for Johnny’s first checkup. The first night at the studio was not a success, which wasn’t surprising considering that he had nothing to write about. This was exactly what you were afraid of. No matter how busy he might be, he hasn’t gotten the real human experience, so what really can he write about? Hard drives and wires?
“Hey Babysitter!” Youngho greeted you cheerfully after spotting you and Johnny some feet away.
You furrowed your eyebrows. “Babysitter?”
“Yeah, you are taking care of my kid after all.” He laughed, ruffling Johnny’s hair, to which Johnny slapped his hand away. “How was the first day?”
You sighed deeply, thinking about yesterday’s events. “It went okay, but we made no progress in the studio.”
Youngho smacked his lips. “Well, that’s alright. We still have six months ahead of us. There’s still time left.”
“That’s true.” You nodded your head. “But on the bright side, Johnny treated me to the best breakfast I had in a while! So brownie points for that.”
Your words came out too fast for Johnny to stop you. He froze, his hand slapping his mouth in shock. He is dead meat.
“He didn’t eat with you, did he?” Youngho blinked at you. Sensing the tension in the air, you nodded slowly, but kept your mouth shut. “Oh my-” Youngho stepped back as if he was about to faint.
He clenched his fist against his forehead and squeezed his eyes shut. You felt like you did something wrong, but you just couldn’t figure out what. You were sure Johnny would tell you if you did.
“Johnny, just head to the back, okay?” Youngho said, his eyes still closed.
“Yes sir.” Johnny rushed away without another word.
“Did I do something wrong...?” You asked shyly.
“No you didn’t, don’t worry.” Youngho sighed. “He knows better. If he eats too much he could clog his gears. But mostly, I just hate cleaning him out, it’s so tedious!” He groaned at the thought of all the clumps of food he has to take out.
“Oh my gosh! I wouldn’t have let him if I have known!” You exclaimed.
Youngho shook his head. “It’s okay, you didn’t know. He seems to be functioning well, so he should be fine.”
You were worried at the thought of Johnny breaking while under your supervision. Imagine getting sued by a company that handles AI’s? Your life would be over! You can’t let that happen, you won’t allow it to happen.
“Is there any way for me to know if he’s okay or not? Like does he feel pain or no?” You asked. You needed to know just in case you had to rush back to the lab if anything happens. You’re not going to be the blame for anything.
“Yes, and no.” Youngho went on to explain. “He can feel you if you tap him on the shoulder, but if you punch him, it’ll still feel like a mere tap. But the only time he does feel pain is when something in his system malfunctions.” You tilted your head, still not catching on. He found your expression cute, and he couldn’t hold back a smile. “Just think about it: when you’re using your phone, it can feel your taps as you scroll. But if you drop it on the ground, you don’t hear it screaming out in pain.”
“Ah, I think I get it now!” You nodded your head fervently.
“Right! But we did program him to feel some type of pain just so we will know if something wrong is happening to the important parts.”
“That makes a lot of sense… Man, you guys really have it all laid out huh?” You couldn’t help but be impressed at the amount of thought that went into creating Johnny.
“Yeah, well, it’s nothing much.” Johnny shoved his hands in his pockets as he shrugged nonchalantly. As laid back as he was acting, nothing could hide the blush that crept onto his face. He’s a sucker for people acknowledging his work.
“Well, as much as I want to argue with you about that, I have to get to my schedule! Kun is waiting for me outside and I can’t keep him waiting. I’ll be back soon!” You waved as you began to walk away.
Youngho waved back to you as he watched you exit the lab. He sighed to himself, not knowing what he was going to do with Johnny. But knowing that it is best to get the job done now rather than later, Youngho dragged his feet to the operation room where Johnny would be waiting.
Johnny tensed up once Youngho entered the room, and he avoided eye contact in hopes he wouldn’t blow up at him. Thankfully, Youngho didn’t have the energy to yell.
“Why did you do that?” The scientist asked simply.
“She was uncomfortable and hungry, so it was the only thing I could think of.” Johnny justified his past actions, but Youngho wasn’t having any of it.
“Let’s just get this over with, and then we’ll check your data.” Youngho sighed as he started to prep for the cleanup.
“Wait, wait! I have a question.” Johnny stopped him. “Do you have a goal?”
Youngho was taken aback by the sudden question. “Yes… I think so? I guess it depends on what the goal is for.” He wasn’t very sure if he had a set goal, but he did know that he is satisfied where he is right at this moment. The only thing he is concerned about is making sure #S127 remains on the rise.
“Do you think… I’m able to have a goal?”
“You can have the goal of winning a Grammy!” Youngho suggested.
Johnny scoffed. “Well, yeah, but I’m talking about for myself. Am I able to find a goal or a passion at least for myself?”
Youngho blinked at his robot. He was at a loss for words. It seems like a simple yes or no question, but there are levels to it. The right answer to this question was up in the air somewhere, and Youngho was finding a hard time finding it. What in the world did you do to his bot?
“I’m sure you can if you put your mind to it,” Youngho answered. He grabbed his phone and began texting you, suggesting that the two of you grab coffee when you get back to the lab. He needed to talk to you to figure out the meaning behind Johnny’s words.
Some hours later, you were at a Starbucks near the lab sitting across from Youngho. You were nervous you did something bad after all, but you couldn’t get yourself to figure out what you’ve done. But thankfully, Johnny was the first to speak.
“So, Johnny asked me a question that kind of shocked me. I’m supposing you asked him the same question yesterday.” He began.
“What question are you talking about?” You asked.
“If he has a goal. He’s been thinking about it really hard.”
You felt as if a huge weight was lifted off your shoulders. You thought of something way worse, even though you talked to Johnny a handful of times yesterday, and the conversations the two of you had were never bad or questionable. Your nervousness always found a way to get to you still.
“Well yeah! He needs to have a passion in order to be a real artist. And to have a passion, he needs to have a goal.” You nodded.
“Are you sure he can have a passion? He’s a robot.”
You were surprised at his response. “Aren’t you the one who created him? I thought you would know this! Writing songs isn’t just jotting down words on a piece of paper you know. It’s much more to it than that.”
Youngho sighed. You’re right, and it bothered him. It’s not you that he’s bothered by, but the fact that he really doesn’t have everything figured out. He’s so used to being a genius and having questions answered before people could even ask them, but the fact that he doesn’t have an answer prepared for something as simple as this messed with his head. How did he expect to make a successful idol group if his idols can’t even write music on their own?
“I could always just give you a song to use.” You suggested.
“No, I don’t want that,” Youngho answered quickly. “We do that every comeback. We need to actually make some improvements.”
You took a sip of your coffee as you watched Youngho try to figure out what to do. You knew Johnny writing his own song was too good to be true, but you have to admit, there is a part of you that believes in him. If he can read and understand human emotion, there are chances for him to be able to write a decent song.
“What was your purpose in making Johnny and the other guys in the group?” You asked suddenly.
Youngho frowned at the memories that came up in his mind. “I actually didn’t create Johnny and the others to be idol singers.” You furrowed your eyebrows at the bombshell. “I actually intended for them to be soldiers.”
Your jaw dropped. You would have never thought of #S127 fighting in a war. It’s a complete 180 from what they are doing right now.
“What made you change your mind?!” To say you were shocked would be an understatement.
“I didn’t change my mind.” He laughed. “The government rejected my offer, but they told me about LSM Inc. and now here I am. Lee Soo Man suggested that I use my bots to make an idol group, and I wanted nothing to do with it. But it was either I make a group, or be broke with robots that have no purpose.”
So he was in a similar situation that you’re in right now. It made you feel happy to see that he seems to enjoy his current circumstances, but still, you can’t get yourself to accept that you have to share competition with AIs who can’t even figure out how to write a song on their own. Despite that, you were growing fond of Johnny, and you wanted him to be able to find his passion. He’s the only AI you would allow to win.
“I would have never thought of Johnny being a soldier.” You laughed, shaking your head. “Considering that this is your current circumstance, you need to figure out if they’re able to create their own goals for themselves. I understand the base goal is to win awards at big music shows and hit the charts, but there needs to be a better foundation.”
Youngho couldn’t help but admire you as you gave your advice. Not only are you beautiful, but you’re thoughtful, and the more you spoke, the more it attracted him to you. Where were you when he needed you the most? The company has worked with so many different artists before you, but you’re the only one that is actually helping. He just wanted to take you into his arms and thank you repeatedly at this moment.
From here on out, Youngho was determined to find out what Johnny’s goal is. Whether it is impossible or not, he is going to make sure Johnny becomes the best songwriter there is.
***
The three months had gone by before you knew it, and in all honesty, you didn’t want to quit the job. Johnny and you had grown closer the more you worked together, and you enjoyed seeing his progress as he worked to become a better and more authentic writer. And Youngho and you also hit it off very well, becoming closer friends the more you talked. You also realized that you were catching feelings for the scientist, but you ignored it, believing that it was nothing but a simple crush. ‘It will pass overtime,’ you would tell yourself.
Kun on the other hand did nothing to remind you of the deal that you made with him since he knew you forgot about it. He enjoyed seeing you have fun made him happy, he never liked seeing you in a sour mood. He too has gotten close with Youngho as well after going out drinking with him and Doyoung several times. Just like tonight.
This time, you decided to join the guys tonight for drinks at the bar. Once you found out Kun was hanging out with the two scientists, you felt left out and invited yourself to the next outing. It wasn’t like they minded though since they love your company.
“So, I heard that you don’t really like AI’s Y/N. Can I ask you why that is?” Doyoung asked.
You poked your lip out as you thought. “Well, it’s mainly because nothing they do feels true to me. It’s all programmed. Not only that, but they’re slowly taking over our jobs. I’m not exactly comfortable with that.”
Youngho shook his head. “I get what you’re saying, but that’s not necessarily true. AI’s, at least the ones we make at LSM, is made to function like humans. So everything they do is learned after we establish a little bit of a foundation we put in their program. And there are still significantly more humans who have jobs than AI’s, but I do get your concern.”
What he said had you thinking. You supposed he was right, but you still felt so odd about it. But you figured it’s just something that you’re going to have to learn to accept as time goes on. The only AI you trust is Johnny, and that’s all that matters to you right now.
“You might be right, but it’s going to take me some time to get used to them. I like Johnny at least.” You shrugged.
“And that’s all I need to hear.” Youngho smiled widely.
You giggled at his antics. “Excuse me, I need to go to the bathroom really quickly. I’ll be back. Don’t buy any more drinks without me!”
“No promises!” Kun called after you, laughing afterward.
Youngho tapped his glass, trying to decide whether the question he has is worth asking or not. But he needed to muster up the courage since it’s an important question. For him at least.
“Hey, Kun, I have a question.” Youngho started.
“Hit me.” Kun nodded.
“Do you… like Y/N?”
Kun threw his head back in laughter. “What?! Where did that come from?”
Youngho could only scratch the back of his neck and let out a small laugh. He was embarrassed, but it’s something he has been wondering about forever now.
“He’s been waiting to ask that question for ages!” Doyoung exclaimed. “He wouldn’t stop bugging me about it.”
“Well, to answer your question, no I don’t. She’s like a sister to me.” Kun shook his head simply. “You should ask her out on a date. I’m sure she’d like that.”
Youngho shook his head fervently. “I don’t know if I can do that. Not right now at least.”
“You never know until you do it.” Doyoung sing-songed. Kun couldn’t help but laugh.
“Shut up, she’s coming back!” Youngho whisper yelled.
For the rest of the night, Youngho thought about you as the four of you enjoyed more drinks. He knew he had feelings for you, but he wasn’t sure if you felt the same as he did. For now, he just wanted to take more time to read your actions before he let you know of his feelings. He needs time to muster up the courage.
The four of you decided to end the night after realizing how tipsy you have gotten. Kun realized that you had a packed schedule the next day, so they needed to get you home immediately. He already knew you were going to regret it later on.
Kun had made sure you got up to your apartment safely. You stopped him at the door, saying that you could get in the house yourself, and just go home. He at least opened the door for you before leaving, hoping that you’ll get to bed right away rather than finding things to do around the house.
When you entered your home, you began to drag your feet toward your room, that was until Johnny stopped you in the hallway.
He leaned forward and sniffed. “Were you drinking?”
You giggled. “Yeah, I was.”
“You might want to get to bed. We have a long day tomorrow.” Johnny pouted at your condition. Looking at how you were, you for sure were going to experience a hand hangover in the morning.
“Yeah, yeah, I will.” You waved him off. You stepped forward to start going to your room, but you paused and stepped back. You looked up at Johnny and sucked in a sharp breath as you thought. “You look a lot like Youngho.”
Johnny blinked, confused at the sudden revelation. “I am aware of that.”
You narrowed your eyes at him. “Are you just saying that because you are Youngho? Are you trying to fool me?” You poked your finger into his chest.
“No…” Johnny wasn’t sure how to respond to your absurd words. He’s never been in this situation before.
“Well, Youngho, goodnight. I will see you tomorrow.” You smiled at him. Rather than leaving, you stood there, staring up at who you believed to be Youngho through your heavy eyelids. Suddenly you got on your toes and pecked his lips softly. “Rest well Youngho.”
Johnny stood in shock after you left to your room. What was he going to tell Youngho? He has never allowed this to happen before. The kiss was so unexpected that he couldn’t dodge it! He hoped he wouldn't get in trouble.
The next day, Johnny was at the lab for the daily check-in.
“How was the night at the Babysitter’s?” Youngho asked as he plugged Johnny’s chip into his computer to retrieve yesterday’s data.
“She kissed me.” Johnny found himself blurting.
“She what?!” Youngho squeaked.
“She kissed me.” He repeated.
Youngho couldn’t believe his ears. He shook his head, slapping his hand on his forehead. “Huh?!”
“She kissed me—“
“I heard you the first two times!” Youngho yelled.
Youngho suddenly turned around to his computer and rushed to retrieve any video data if there were any. And there was. The camera hidden behind Johnny’s eyes wasn’t always on, but they only started recording if Johnny felt that he needed to. Youngho played the video, nervous about what he’s about to see. But all that worry washed away after seeing your drunken smile. Seeing you kiss his robot amused him more than he thought, as he couldn’t help but snort and laugh hysterically at what he just watched. It was something he never thought he would see or even hear about.
“She thought I was you,” Johnny revealed, which shut Youngho’s laughter up.
“W-Wait, really?” He was shocked.
“Yeah. She kept calling me Youngho.” Johnny nodded. “I think she likes you.”
A blush crept up Youngho’s neck, and he couldn’t hold back the grin on his face. Knowing that you had the same feelings he currently has sent him over the moon. He just wished you kissed him rather than his lookalike.
Youngho waited until the evening to talk to you so that you were free from all your schedules. The two of you spoke at the convenience store near your apartment, enjoying a canned beverage.
“So… Johnny found out what his goal is,” Youngho revealed.
You gasped, clapping your hand over your mouth. “For real? What is it?” You were slightly disappointed that you didn’t know what it was first since you’re the one that is with him most of the time, but you could care less since the whole point is that he knows what he’s working for now.
“Well, his goal is to gain more of a human understanding. He wants to be able to truly write a song. And he found a passion in… people, to simply put it.” Youngho chuckled. “He talks more and asks more questions than he has ever had before.”
“That’s great! I’m so glad, I was really rooting for him.” You cooed.
“I just want to thank you so much. He has been making so much improvement since he started working with you. You really helped us out. You helped him out.” Youngho smiled softly.
“Oh it’s no biggie. I’m glad I was of some help.” You laughed. “He’s the one who did most of the work, so the credit should go to him.”
“I’m supposing that’s why you kissed him then? Because you’re proud of him?” Youngho asked suddenly, a playful smirk on his face.
“What?” Your eyes grew wide in shock. “I kissed him?”
Youngho’s cackles filled the air. “You don’t remember? Ah, I suppose you wouldn’t since you were so drunk last night. Johnny told me you thought he was I, and you kissed him.”
Your fingertips touched your lips after the memories started coming back to you. “Oh my gosh!” You groaned, dragging your hands down your face. “This is so embarrassing!”
“Don’t be embarrassed! Actually, I’m quite flattered.” Youngho reassured you. “Just be sure to kiss me next time.”
You brought your hands down from your face so you could get a good look at his expression. You had to figure out whether he was joking or not.
And to answer your unspoken question, he cupped your cheek with his hand and placed a soft kiss on your lips.
“Please tell me this feeling is mutual.” You whispered.
Youngho chuckled, poking your nose as he sat back in his seat.
“Don’t worry. I want you to be mine as much as you want me to be yours. You have me baby.”
#nct#nct 127#nct scenarios#johnny suh#johnny#nct u#nct imagines#kpop scenarios#kpop imagines#johnny imagines#johnny x reader#johnny scenarios#johnny drabbles#johnny seo#johnny fluff
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Moments: Elite Fanfiction
This is a silly, goofy, bit I wrote while I was making tea yesterday. Sometimes I have an elaborate process and it made me think of how Nadia would have to teach Guzman his way around a kitchen since he grew up with a chef and maid and he needs domestic lessons lol. Will be part of a series of one-shots with GN domesticity. Warning, this is ridiculous af and a big stream of consciousness, hope you guys like it anyway! oh also some mild references of racism and islamaphobia
"You know when I asked you how to make tea, I didn't realize I was signing up for a science experiment."
Guzman looks on with wide eyes as Nadia pulls out a pot, filling it with water while grabbing a measuring cup. She smirks and winks at him as she pulls out a can of evaporated milk from the fridge.
"Hey, you said you wanted to learn how to make my favorite tea," she says with a shrug. "This is how."
Guzman eyes the supplies Nadia laid out on the counter and points at the can. "And what's that?"
"Milk."
He balks at her. "Milk? I've never seen milk in a can before."
Nadia snorts at his bewildered expression and rubs his shoulder affectionately. "Oh you poor, rich baby. Let me teach you. This is called evaporated milk. It’s usually used to make desserts but I like putting it in my tea. Makes it smooth, thick and delicious."
Nadia hums in delight at the thought of the delicious tea and Guzman can't help raise an eyebrow suggestively. "Smooth, thick, and delicious, huh? Sounds familiar."
She gasps, scandalized, and shoves at his shoulder. "You're such a pervert. Don't ruin the moment."
He tickles her waist, teasing. "I thought I was creating the moment."
Nadia fixes a stern look upon him, eyebrows raised, even as she fights back a smile. He sees her trembling lips and wants to tease her some more but instead pretends to be properly chastised.
"Yes ma'am," he says solemnly, his hands clasped together in supplication. "I promise to behave."
"Good," she says with a nod and misses how he mutters "For now," under his breath.
Nadia takes out a glass measuring cup, different from the other ones she had pulled out, and fills it with water.
"Wait, what is that for?"
"This is a measuring cup," Nadia answers patiently. "I'm using it to measure out four cups of water."
"But you already have those measuring cups," Guzman says, gesturing at the smaller, ceramic ones.
"Those are for dry ingredients, this one is for wet ingredients. Like water."
Guzman scratches his head. "This is way more complicated than I thought."
"We haven't even begun! Really, it's simple, just pay attention." She pours four cups of water into a small pot with a wooden handle."
"Wait, why are you putting it in a pot?"
Now it's Nadia's turn to look at him with bemusement. "Where else would I put it?"
"I don't know, in a kettle or something?"
"I told you, I'm making stove-top tea. Kettle tea is fine, but doesn't work as well for what I'm trying to do."
"Oh ok," Guzman says as though he understood even though he didn't. He watches her set the pot on top of the stove attentively, leaning against the counter. "Continue."
Nadia shoots him a teasing look. "I'm going to turn on the stove now. Will you be able to behave near the flame? No hanky panky."
Guzman lunges toward her, wrapping her up in his arms. "Well since you gave me a warning, I'll take advantage of the moment now, thank you." He smacks a kiss against her cheek.
She doesn't struggle out of his grip, instead slaps at his hand on her hand as though calling his attention. "If you're going to goof around, at least pay attention."
"Ok, ok, I'm paying attention." He rests his chin on her shoulder, looking over to see what she was doing. "When does the tea part come in?"
"Oh my god, Guzman!"
"Sorry, sorry, go ahead." He squeezes her bashfully to alleviate her ire.
She heaves a deep sigh. "Ok so as I was going to say," she says pointedly. "Let the water boil for a little bit before you put the tea in."
"How come? Why not just throw it all together?"
"Because the water isn't hot enough to steep the flavors out of the leaves. The leaves will just sit there but the flavors aren't being activated. Only the heat can draw it out, especially if you want the tea to be strong, which I do."
Guzman nods like an attentive student, Nadia's curls brushing against his cheek. He can't help but lean into her more, rubbing his cheek against hers. "Right, that I knew. Now I know to keep the leaves in longer when I make it for you."
"Exactly." She smiles and lightly caresses his ear with her free hand. "So, once you see the bubbles on the surface like that, it means…?"
She waits for him to fill in the blank and like a good student, he says "It’s ready for the tea leaves?"
"Good job!"
She actually sounds genuine when she says that and Guzman, like a dork, feels his chest swell with pride. Hah! He got something right. There was hope for him yet.
She steps away from him and gestures to the loose tea leaves. "Would you like to do the honors? Remember half a cup of the leaves."
Guzman nods eagerly, reaching for the leaves and the measuring cup when Nadia abruptly halts his movements. "Half cup, Guzman!"
He looks at the measuring cup in his hand, confused. "Isn't this half a cup? It looks small."
"Honey, no. It's labeled, see? That's a whole cup. We don't want me dying of heart palpitations."
Guzman whips around to look at her, wide-eyed. "You get heart palpitations? I didn't know that. Are you ok?"
He moves closer to her but she soothes him. "It's ok, it's nothing serious. I've just been over-caffeinating lately because of classes. I should probably slow down on it," she says, rubbing her chest absent-mindedly.
He places his hand against her heart, a frown on his face. He feels the steady thump and he relaxes a little. "How long has this been happening?"
She sets her hand over his. "It's ok. Life of a college student who's double-majoring and with a minor," she says with a wry smile.
Guzman's frown deepens, bordering on a pout as he pulls her into a hug. "You work too hard."
"It's all I've ever known," she says with a shrug, chuckling when he squeezes her tighter.
"It's a good thing I'm here, then."
He hadn't fully grasped just how much stress she was under. He knew, logically, that she had a lot on her plate with school and even a part-time job on the side. She had sent him a copy of her course schedule and her work schedule so that he knew where she was and could coordinate calls accordingly. He remembered opening up the email and balking at how packed it was, his own stress level rising on her behalf. But whenever he would talk to her, she was dismissive and said it was normal.
Nadia was always good at shielding stress sometimes to the point where she wasn't even aware of it herself and it worried him. But he was here now and he would take care of her.
He presses a kiss to her forehead, pulling away softly. Just then he sees the water bubbling over and as though they were in sync, Nadia's eyes widen and she whips around.
"The water!" they shout in unison, rushing to lower the heat.
They watch the bubbles fade until it's just a low simmer. Nadia sighs, shaking her head. "Yeah, that's not a step. Let's not repeat that."
Guzman salutes her and turns back to the measuring cups, taking care to look at the label on them to make sure he picked up the right one. He was definitely not trying to send his girlfriend to an early grave, especially not now that he finally has her.
"Ok, I got it!" He brandishes the half cup proudly, checking to make sure she saw. She shakes her head affectionately at his boyish excitement and claps again, the gesture genuine.
"Nice."
He carefully pours the leaves into the cup, glancing at the water to make sure it didn't bubble over again, but the heat was low and it was sage again. He gets a good whiff of the leaves and is pleasantly surprised by the smell.
"Whoa, what kind of leaves are there? Where do you get them from?" He looks up from smelling them and grins at her. "You know, since they're a staple for you."
"There's a middle eastern café not too far from here with live music and good food. They have a little shop at the back where they sell tea and all kinds of other snacks. Ooh we should go this Sunday night. I think that's when they're having their special and a performer who's supposed to be really good."
Guzman brings over the tea leaves, his grin widening at her excitement. He can't help but beam at her happiness, every time she smiles so brightly or gets excited about something.
"Definitely. Anything you want." He gestures toward the now boiling water with the cup of leaves. "Is it ready?"
"Fire away!"
Guzman looks at her, cautious, before his eyes flit to the open window. Nadia rests a reassuring hand on his shoulder knowing where his mind had gone.
"Don't worry," she says.
Guzman grimaces. "I've heard New Yorkers are crazy and assholes. Especially after what happened here all those years ago."
"It's not anything more or less different than what I've dealt with before." Before he can say anything else, she nods toward the pot. "Toss the tea in before it boils over again."
Guzman knows that he'll always worry about her and about people being hostile or worse, violent, toward her just because of her appearance, her beliefs. But it wasn't because of her, Nadia wasn’t the problem. It was others and what others perceive her beliefs to be. He knew all too well how radical racists could be, creating their own narratives. He knew because once upon a time, he was among those assholes.
He never resented Nadia for her hijab or religion, but he certainly didn't discourage other people's narrow perceptions. Not until he got to know her and learned that all the stereotypes that ignorant people perpetuated were complete and utter bullshit. If he could beat up his past self, he would but instead, he would fight for Nadia. She was no damsel that was for sure, but he would be right by her side, fighting alongside her. Fight for her beliefs, her rights, her freedom. He would spend the rest of his life righting his wrongs and making sure those that did wrong her, would soon learn not to.
But now was not the time for dark thoughts because his girlfriend was looking at him expectantly. He had wanted to learn how to make her favorite tea so that he could make it for her whenever she wished, he wanted to be able to bring her some small piece of comfort when she needed it.
He steps closer to the stove and pours the tea in. He watched in fascination as the boiling water rose to engulf the leaves, turning the once clear water a thick, dark sludge almost.
"Wow, this really is a science demonstration," he murmurs. "It looks like wet mud actually."
Nadia snorts. "Yeah, I suppose so." She looks at him with sparkling eyes, the amusement shining bright. "Your fascination with the simplest thing is both hilarious and cute."
"My parents always drank coffee and even then I never saw them actually make it. Probably because they never actually made it themselves," he adds.
"Well, allow me to humble you," Nadia winks. "Ok now stir with the wooden spoon."
Guzman obliges, stirring the boiling, dark water carefully. The sludge had looked thick on the surface but as soon as he began to stir, the smooth liquid gave way to the spoon.
"Nadia, you humbled me the moment you blackmailed me at that party."
"Hmm I think it took a bit more time than that. Ok so you're now going to let the water boil with the leaves. Then you're--"
"What? There's another step?" he asks, astonished.
Nadia gestures to the can of what he now understood to be evaporated milk. He made a mental note of the size and appearance of the can for future reference. "Yeah, what did you think that was for."
Guzman stammers. "Well…I guess, I don't know, I thought that's supposed to be the last step? Isn't that how the British do it?"
"And when exactly did I become British. Moreover, when were the British deemed to have dictatorship on tea-making?"
"True," he concedes. "I guess I didn't realize there were so many ways to make tea, especially ways that took soooo long."
Nadia shrugs with a grin. "You want quality tea, you have to put the work in."
Guzman couldn't help the broad smile that broke across his face. "Sounds familiar. I had to work really hard for you, didn't I? Worth."
He considers this a moment as Nadia pulls a box from the cabinet. They've been together for awhile now and living together for three months already and still, Guzman had moments where he couldn't believe they were truly together. How many times had he fantasized about running away with Nadia? Too many to count and yet he had never envisioned this particular scenario. The reality was so much sweeter than anything he could have imagined.
"Glad you think so. And I'm grateful you were patient with me." She pushes the open box toward him after kissing his cheek. "Ok now you're going to grab the other measuring cup, the one that's labeled two thirds."
Guzman looks between Nadia, the box, and the simmering pot of tea.
"Nadia, are you making tea or a potion? Are you secretly a witch and this is your way of telling me?"
"Hey, it wouldn't have taken so long if you didn't keep interrupting with your commentary. You talk a lot." She flicks his ear lob teasingly. "Now hop to it."
"Yes, master."
Guzman takes care to find the correct measuring cup this time and scoops the white granules from the box. "And what is this?"
"Sweetener."
"I thought that was the sugar." He gestures at the shaker labeled azucar. Nadia was so organized he never had trouble finding things even when he first moved in.
"It is, but this is sweetener. It's a good substitute for sugar sometimes, especially for me since I drink too much tea."
"This doesn't have your label on it though."
Nadia twists the box to the side where the brand and logo is presented with the word sweetener on it.
"Oh."
Guzman pours in the milk then the measured amount of sweetener, watching the color change into a pretty brown color, resembling a light chocolate.
"This is cool actually, I feel like an important scientist. Look what I just created."
"You are an important scientist. My scientist, you did great work."
She rubs his back in that way that's become familiar to him.
Living together, he saw another side of Nadia, one that made him fall in love with her even more and he hadn't thought that was possible. He loved the way he stretched as she woke every morning, the way she put toothpaste on his brush automatically, the way she hip-checked him to spit into the sink before he could, the way she always served him a heaping helping of food like she thought he had been starving for a month, the way she rubbed his back or neck or hair as she passed by him around their apartment. These small moments meant everything to him, these casual but intimate touches that told him she loved him and was thinking about him, kept him in this perpetual state of contentment and he never fails to return the touch.
He does so now, pulling her to his side and kissing her temple and he watches her turn off the heat. He's taking note of everything she's telling him and showing him so he can surprise her with her favorite comfort drink.
"Is it done now?" he asks eagerly. He wanted her to try it and he was excited to see if he had managed to replicate the delicious way she makes it.
"Almost. We have to strain out the leaves."
"Ah shit."
"We should definitely cook more often," Nadia says in amusement, pulling two glasses down from the cupboard. "Forget take-out, we're cooking. I get dinner and a show."
Guzman takes the small strainer from her, taking care with the steaming pot. "Hopefully not burned dinner. I just pour the tea into the cups now? Through the strainer?"
"Exactly and then we're done."
Once Guzman pours out two glasses of tea, he sets them in front of Nadia with a flourish. It's silly but he's still proud especially when Nadia hops excitedly.
"Done?"
"Done"
Guzman watches anxiously as Nadia takes a careful sip, waiting with baited breath for her final verdict.
Nadia sighs in contentment. "Perfection."
"Really?"
"Really."
Nadia sets down her cup to return his enthusiastic embrace. "I know how to make tea now! Who would have thought?"
She pulls away and takes another sip, smirking over the rim of the cup. "Definitely not me."
He sticks his tongue out at her before reaching for his own cup. Nadia was right, it was perfect.
"You know I'm going to expect this to be a regular thing now, right?" Nadia says, her smiling lips pressing against his.
He pulls her close, letting their glasses clink lightly. "Anything for my girl. That's why I wanted to learn. So I could make it for you whenever you wanted."
And he kept that promise for the rest of their lives. Even when they were old and graying, Guzman made sure the love of his life had warm tea ready with a kiss.
#Guznadia#Guzman x Nadia#Nadia x Guzman#Nuzman#Netflix Elite#Guznadia Fanfiction#Guznadia Fanfic#cygnetofthesea writings#cygnetofthesea edits#cygnetofthesea graphics
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it’s gonna be okay
summary: your best friend would always make you feel loved and comforted and tonight was nothing different.
pairing: izuku midoriya x reader
genre: angst / fluff
word count: 2k
warnings: mean mom ;; it’s not too specific about why
a/n: requested by @lavenderbutton05 and i hope you like it :)
© 2021 by softtamaki
so !!
currently there’s a lot of things that have been happening recently
some good :D
some bad >:(
but either way you’ve always had your best friend to cheer you up
that’s right izuku midoriya is your best friend!! but even that has a sour taste in your mouth since recently, you two have been very touchy
and technically katsuki bakugou is also your bff but like don’t tell anyone that because he gets REALLY angry
for legit no reason too
it’s not like you have friday 4pm solely dedicated towards going to your favorite shop and eating food
(you totally do but if ANYONE — even izuku — knew, goodbye free sweets hello angry bakugou)
back to the point
midoriya confessed to you a week ago but ran off before you could say it back, eventually you did tell him
the two of you are taking it really slowly and don’t have any labels (yet)
but midoriya has always managed to keep you on your toes
no like ,, literally
“come on, y/n. you got this!”
“izuku i swear to all might, are you trying to kill me?”
midoriya sighed and his hands went back to the side of his body
he was trying to get you outside
while trying not to get super flustered at using his first name (even though you’ve used it a million times)
he wants to know what’s bothering of late, you’re being secretive and generally dismissive and it’s making him worried
“just, trust me? i’ll catch you!”
currently, you were on the railing of the girls UA dorm building and midoriya was on the floor underneath
your regeneration quirk wouldn’t be that useful in this situation so you’re grateful that you’ve been training in different martial arts
aikido would be very helpful in this situation since it would be best at helping you get down gracefully
you jump down the railing and land on the flat ground with a loud slap due to the sandals you had on
it was too hot for shoes! slippers are much better for the fast approaching summer time
“so.. where are we going?”
“somewhere nice, a breath of fresh air. i-is that okay?”
you smiled and nodded your head, gesturing midoriya to continue forward
he led you for a few minutes in silence, it was a comfortable silence
you weren’t going far, or you know aizawa would get mad, but far enough to get away from the dorms and breathe
you talked about your internships and the way the league of villains had been acting up recently
the topic eventually led to your friends and when you were ranting about denki not paying attention during class, midoriya suddenly stopped
“yeah and he always asks me later about what we learned despite being there! it’s like he forgets everything.. oh are we here?”
“yeah, just a little over to the side. don’t get to annoyed at him though, i’m sure he means the best”
“yeah, yeah, i know”
you two stop at a bench and sit down
looking up you see the blurry sky, hazy from the light pollution of the city lights you see down below
it was pretty and it made you think about how small you really are
midoriya was a little upset that it wasn’t as starry of a night as he had predicted but that would be a later concern, right now you were the priority (you always were to him)
“y/n, is..is something wrong?”
“hm? what do you mean?”
“you’ve been awfully quiet during class. plus, at lunch when kacchan told denki to shut up, you didn’t even say anything..”
“should..i have said something?”
“i m-mean kacchan never means what he says but you usually do. plus you’re usually more up for this sort of thing and yet you were so hesitant..”
“can you blame me? did you hear about how many villains are—”
“okay! i get it.”
midoriya abruptly starts, upset that you’re still denying the fact that something is wrong
you had every right to not tell him but he feels this might be a ‘i-don’t-want-to-burden-others’ type of thing more than ‘it’s-none-of-your-business’ thing
but you’re not responding so maybe he was wrong? he looks up to your face and his heart cracks
you’re frowning and eyes are watering, like you just got bullied
“oh shoot, i didn’t mean-“
“i’ve just been so.. lost lately”
midoriya stops and looks softly at you
your hands are quivering at this point and so midoriya brushes his fingers against them
you can feel the gentleness of his touch and don’t retract your hand
instead, you crave it and slowly make a move to grab his fingers
he blushes and looks away, trying not to tear up at the sweet gesture
“other than villains and the internship, school has been hectic. i can’t seem to catch a break!”
“mhm, i feel you. it’s like everyone’s trying to make it our last year here.”
you laugh and nod
“plus! aizawa is letting us go on our first missions next month, like i know it’s just a practice mission but wow time has flown so fast..”
your smile slowly fades and you steel your jaw to not let your facade fall
“..and things at home aren’t that great either”
there it is
midoriya stops looking at the city lights and sees you rubbing your arm in hesitation
“take your time, don’t worry it’s okay.”
“my mom’s been really rude lately”
“you don’t have to say anything y/n”
“oh i know it’s just, i want to? if that’s okay.”
“of course, continue. i’m here for you”
“well you know me and i recently told m-my mother who i was and she didn’t have a great reaction..”
“oh y/n, i’m- i’m so sorry.”
“it hurts you know? like my mom is supposed to be the one person who supports me no matter what but now.. now she’s being so mean and i don’t know what to think anymore..”
midoriya looks down at your hand that’s now tightly clasped around his, and instead of getting nervous, he holds yours back with the same strength
when he looks back up, you’re crying and his heart shatters completely
he doesn’t like seeing you sad and knowing that someone hurt you like this makes him so angry
taking a deep breath, midoriya brings his other hand to your waist and pushes you into his chest
after a small yelp, you’re now hugging and sitting in midoriya’s lap
his sweater is probably going to be damp with the tear stain but with his hands quietly patting and rubbing your back, you don’t seem to care
“she thinks she’s known me but she really doesn’t. she thinks i’m lying about it.”
“lying? you would never lie about something like this.”
“right? is like you’re the only over who actually pays attention to me.”
you remove yourself from the crook of his neck and look up to your best friend/more than a friend/boyfriend
the person that’s been there since day 1 and has always been supporting everything you are and do
you’ve never felt scared or lonely knowing that he’s right there next to you
midoriya looks at you like you’re the only person in the world
like the stars in the sky are in your eyes and can tell him how wonderfully excited you get when fighting or practicing
but now your soft cheeks are damp and he doesn’t want his favorite person in the world to be crying
he slowly brushes your tears away, fighting back his own tears by seeing you in pain
the two of you just sit and bask in each other’s presence
“you’re safe with me.”
you try to push down the words that are lumped in your throat from his comfort, but you can’t
“izuku, i love you.”
“i love you too, y/n. everything going to be alright.”
he smiles wide and you can’t stop the grin from rising to your lips
he takes your cheeks into his hands and slowly pecks your forehead
he’s also blushing like crazy and you can vaguely feel his body shaking
you grin, and with a leap of faith you kiss his cheek and he almost combusts
“y/n! i-i’m supposed to be making you happy- not the other way around.”
“you do make me happy! this makes me happy izuku!”
you’ve completely lost him
he’s half contemplating if he should bury his head into your shoulder but the short sleeved shirt you’re wearing makes him surprised
his mood instantly changes and he’s setting you down next to him on the bench before you can even register it
you’re pouting and he’s got half the heart to kiss you again but (your) health comes first
so he takes off his blue hoodie and gently says “up”
now you’re flustered because “oh-my-god-he’s-giving-me-his-hoodie”
he pushes it down on you and you’re already liking the super soft material
he’s looking at your smile and he can’t help but tear up a little and goes to hug you tightly
at this point you’re never going to get tired or used to midoriya having his strong arms around you, it’s heaven
but you can feel him shaking and you’re worried now
“izuku? is something wrong?”
“no! no, it’s fine i-it’s just..your mom sucks..and you don’t deserve this, you know? you deserve everything in the world and i wish i could give it to you and not let anyone make you cry.”
“oh..you think i deserve the world?”
“no,”
you’re confused and he takes his head of your shoulder and looks down at you
“you deserve more than the world. and you definitely deserve people who build you up and love you, not hurt you like this.”
midoriya wonders if your smile from his words is the brightest thing he’ll ever see, and even when the sun comes up and he’s still holding you and talking, he’s proven right
“you’re really cheesy..”
he smiles with his eyes closed and his freckles are shining in the moonlight
“you make me really cheesy y/n.”
the two of you hug for longer, in the cold night but the comfort radiating off of him makes you warm
he lifts his head up,
“um, can i kiss you?”
the look you give him makes his heart do somersaults and he’s trying not to die just looking at you
you nod your head and with a vocalized yes and he dips in to capture your lips
it distracts you from the lulling pain in your heart and you’re happy for it
as much as you think you can talk about what’s bothering you for longer, you really just needed something else
you two separate and you fall into his chest and when you snuggle up beside him, he’s about to fall apart
the rest of the night, midoriya talks about anything and everything, trying to distract you and tell you that he loves you and everything will be okay
he never makes it seem that he’s upset or minds doing this and always makes you feel loved and comfy
patting your head and rubbing your back, you slowly fall asleep to his loving words and he keeps on holding you until the sun rises
instead of waking you up, he decides to carry you (he doesn’t even need his quirk because to him, you’re soft and as light as a feather)
he doesn’t know how he didn’t get in trouble when he opened the door to your dorm and set you in your bed
or when he was tucking you in and kissing your forehead goodnight
or when he kept sitting next to you, thinking about how much he wanted to cuddle you and take all your fears away
he ultimately said “screw it” and decided cuddles were more important
any teasing from your friends and an annoyed kacchan saying “finally deku!” tomorrow would all worth it when you shifted in your sleep and cuddled into izuku’s chest
the i love you’s you exchanged made everything okay and you were so happy to know that your best friend would always be at your side
it’s gonna be okay
#izuku midoriya#deku#izuku midoriya x reader#midoriya headcanons#midoriya x reader#bnha x reader#anime x reader#bnha x y/n#bnha x gender neutral reader#bnha headcanons#deku midoriya#midoriya x reader comfort headcanons#midoriya x reader comfort#my writing
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Never Have I ever S2
SPOILERS.....Turn back now I’m serious.
I’m waiting....
Okay cool your fault at this point
I was fairly critical of NHIE S1, I won’t lie. And I’ll be real I still stand by the fact that NHIE S1 was fairly meh overall.
But holy shit, they knocked this season outta the world man. The show really really found its proper footing this season. They were smart to keep the cheating for only two episodes and explore the repercussion for the other 8.
1.Devi Vishwakumar.
Let’s start with the main character. Devi still does immensely fucked up shit this season. Dating two boys and have them find out in the MOST humiliating way possible. Yikes. Being a really sucky friend to Aneesa and starting that rumour about her (inadvertently) and pretending to her. Stalking her mother and being possessive of her. The really awful apology that was pretty self centred, a bit not good.
But she really does do her best to improve and I am SO proud of that. She uses her father’s advice and apologizes better to Aneesa, she actually handled the Ben and Aneesa dating WAAAAY better than I’ve seen some people handle things like that. I might’ve blown a fuse if two of my friends had 4 tickle fights and had major PDA sessions when we were trying to do a group project. Like she handled that shit fairly well all things considered. Devi actually gets into the beginnings of delving into her trauma and her temporary paralysis and healing from it. I
really see how the label ‘crazy’ weighs on her and how she blew up with it and the message of destigmatizing mental illness. (Crazy Aneesa and Crazy Devi) Her properly bonding with her mother and watching videos of her father and remembering/honouring his memory hit REALLY HARD (since I lost many people in my family recently and that fear of forgetting them has been real). Devi is actually beginning to heal from the loss of her father by strengthening the relationship with her Amma. And the slap from Paati was so so needed, it really gave her a better respect of her mother and fixed the problem I had with Devi mouthing off so much to her Amma. I live to see good maamiyar marumagal relationships. Her relationship with Paxton is really good and it gets developed very logically and having her be scared of being pathetic but in the end she accepted her own self worth and stopped chasing after them which was good.
Overall Devi really blossomed into her own developing person and I actually like her so much more this season.
2. Paxton Hall Yoshida
I was honestly, like genuinely sad last season he was like 80% eye candy with not much else going for him. Paxton had so much faith as a character and Ms Kaling has really pulled him into such a better person this season.
Paxton got hit by a car before swim season, lost his ticket to college and wow, got two timed by a girl he liked all in two episodes. If he was salty about that for more than one season I would’ve completely accepted it. Cause that’s a bad public humiliation.
Paxton episode really really made me love him as a character (honestly more so than Ben) I think because I heard Paxton’s entire worry and irritation that he was being underestimated and no one really expected him to go to college from a friend of mine not more than a month ago. That shit is real, and it hurted my friends a lot that people were really underestimating them and just seeing them as a dumb athlete who has no hope of college. It’s really nice to see Paxton actually want to go to college and learn Japanese American side with his Oji-chan giving him advice and supporting him. And him bringing his grandfather to speak about the internment camps, that seriously do not get spoken about enough.
Also him putting effort and making a genuine effort to work hard and bring up his grades with Devi and therefore bonding with her was really nice to see. I wouldn’t mind them being endgame but Devi does really work a lot better as his pushy Indian mom/best friend/tutor. And Devi getting mad at him for him expecting him to hold his hand throughout really hit well. Was it deserved yeah. But Devi also did blow him off after promising him to study so his anger is justified there. I’m just kinda vibing with Paxton like coming up and taking a better interest in school and being a full 3D character. And that one scene where he gives the extra credit presentation and Trent high fives the man. Classic.
Can I also just say, it’s kinda valid that Paxton didn’t want to date her in public. Is it a dick move...yeah? But he’s within his rights to ask and she’s within her rights to deny. And he didn’t press her once she said no, he went along with it. And what Devi pulled on him is awful, and speaking as someone who’s seen popular kid cliques. Reputation really is important. Like what Devi did made Paxton lose face, if he gets back with Devi he ain’t gonna have any respect left in him. And Paxton was pretty right in deciding to not date her publicly, like even in the end he knows that his reputation is shot for what he did. Do we even know if Paxton has friends that aren’t fixated on his social status? Because becoming a social pariah without having any support of friends is gonna hurt like a bitch. Lord knows how Paxton gonna deal with it. I think Trent might be his only homie after the social downfall he will inevitably face.
I’m just gonna say, Paxton is my favourite now and I’m really rooting for him. Something I decidedly did not do last season. I’m happy Ms Kaling developed him so much and got me interested.
3. Ben Gross
Ah. Ben. Ben’s not my faaavouriteee.......like he’s fine. But I don’t love him. I can definitely see him and Devi becoming an almost endgame couple though. Especially with S2 ending.
Ben is fine and he’s pretty developed, especially with his episode in S1 and it was good he took a backseat this season and let everyone else star. I feel like he’ll come back strong next season though.
Personally do I ship him with Devi? No. I’ve been in a friendship with the similar competitive dynamic as Ben and Devi. And it was terrible. We loved to argue and we got each other’s super brainy side as Devi puts it. But we pushed each other faar too much and even the small things became arguments and each pthers achievements became jealousy. So yeah....I don’t have too much faith in the dynamic due to personal bias, but I’d love to see how it gets handled.
Also my brother Ben, PDA is a thing and it is common courtesy to refrain from it. Man’s really going at it with Aneesa half the time. But also the moment where Aneesa sort of choked on the presentation and Ben’s irritation at it gave me BAAAD vibes. It feels like while Devi can match him, they might push each other too far,
4. Kamala
I LOVE KAMALA. Girl is an ENTIRE vibe. My sweetheart, love of my life. I could go on. I really like her development as well and the banter between her and Nalini. The part where Nalini practically said she looked like a call girl and she was like ippadi potathaan velaila mariyaatha kidaikum. I legit had to pause, scream in laughter for a good few seconds.
They had such a good story with her and wanting to fight against the fact that they took her work and didn’t credit her and everyone was telling her to like take it bowing. Prasanth’s advice unfortunately checked out to me, because I’ve been told that all my life. My dad says it a lot and I know he doesn’t say it cause’ he doesn’t believe in me, but he loves me and wants my life to be easier and for me to succeed and his experience is that he’s had to deal with things like this and fighting won’t help. So yeah, what Prasanth said did not rub me the wrong way at all and I agreed with it and I’m fairly disappointed about that. I get that she got nervous and had cold feet about marriage but I do hope she and Prasanth can work this out through communication. Because I really don’t feel like Prasanth is the bad guy here. It’s just a miscommunication.
So yeah, a LOT of Kamala’s storyline continues to really hit me hard.
5. Nalini Vishwakumar
Nalini really had so much more screentime to blossom. I love that she has a good relationship with Mohan’s amma. It’s wonderful and I love it. Also I was shocked to see the house in Chennai. Like this house...in Chennai. The Chennai I’m used to and the Chennai they are used to are different Chennai’s. Basically wealth gap is crazy as hell and I was lowkey highkey confused if the actually shot this shit in Chennai. But props to the directors for putting some proper Tamil vibes in there. Like the scene where they kaala thottu kumbudurathu (touch the elder’s feet) before they leave for the US is so real and so vibes. I like that they decided to bring paati back. I was like hoping for it.
Also they really went at developing Nalini’s character as a workaholic mom who doesn’t get her daughter. That’s also a really common thing in Indian households with one working parent so I’m happy they portrayed that. I’m happy Nalini actually has a life outside her family portrayed and is still such a typical mother that it hits HARD. I love Nalini and she really developed as a character dealing with grief from Mohan’s death, the wish to move on with Dr.Jackson but knowing that she isn’t ready yet.
They gave her character a life and proper working outside Devi and it really has shown to develop her character and impact her relationship with Devi. The advice to “just say yes” works with cousins and younger siblings as well, I’ve heard it before and used it..and it saves so much time. Especially with small children.
(A memory I have is of my younger cousin going on and on about a princess and a castle and fighting a dragon and the witches and so much fantasy shit and ended with do you wanna come? I just clocked off my CCA’s and I had no energy left to question it so I just went yeah sure. Easiest decision, and 10/10 advice. )
6. Aneesa
I’m not gonna lie. I was skeptical of Aneesa and I didn’t like how Devi saw her in the trailer. But Aneesa reminds me so much of me....and its killing me.
Also the scene where she charms the hell out of Nalini and paati ma has literally happened to me before. Most of my Indian friends hate it..because I was raised with a lot more traditional manners with my grandparents so me and my siblings all are old fashioned which parents LOVE. And I really saw that Aneesa charming them and Devi also realizing, Damn none of my friends actually treat my family the way they should be treated, perks of having an Indian friend.
Also the scene where she gets Devi out of trouble is so so real. Because if you have one responsible friend that you parents trust, you could lie the hell to them, get you homie to back you up and it will work. Personal experience. So yeah, Aneesa character resonated with me a lot.
I also like that she wasn’t just a popular 1D Indian girl but she was genuinely cool and actually had proper issues and development where she gets more open to Sherman Oaks and actually kinda properly rebels against Noor, with having Ben as a boyfriend.
I feel like Aneesa has a lot more potential for growth, especially with the relationship with Ms Noor and Aneesa acting as a foil to Nalini and Devi’s. Also, I feel like Aneesa can grow within her social status at school as well and have Devi maturely handle it. Aneesa I feel will really really challenge Devi’s ability to be mature.
7. Eleanor and Fabiola’s plotlines
Okay like actually, major props to Ms Kaling man. This show touches so so many teen issues in one goddamn show. Emotionally manipulative relationships. So SO good. A lot of newer age relationships have a much more subtle and dangerous line of abuse that’s hard to find out. Like honestly it took me a while to see it as well and I realized oh fuck. oh fuck...I see it it’s bad. They really got the essence of Eleanor’s flamboyance matching with Malcom? (is it Malcolm..fuck it it’s Malcolm now) his “suaveness” and traditionally charming tendency. It made sense and it’s very realistic how Eleanor got played like a damn fiddle. I also again feel that the make up was faar to quick but I really appreciate that Eleanor got her own storyline with her step-mom and understanding of relationships instead of the show hyperfocusing on just Devi. I respect that a lot. Petition to get a Eleanor narration episode.
Fabiola’s storyline also was well taken. It’s an interesting added layer to the queer experience and how queerness can be expected to be performative and but really its all about being more of yourself. The idea that queer people don’t owe nobody anything or have to perform an ideal version of queerness and Fabiola struggling with that kinda hit. The part where they talked about her mother learning to support them and being Cricket? Queen/King. Like being trailblazers for the POC community and the LGBTQ+ community having overlapping struggles. Again, I liked that Fabiola was getting more personal screentime and less of her story revolving around Devi’s.
8. Everything else
I liked that there was more Tamil being casually thrown around. Like the Kamala vaadi to hold the suitcase down as they zipped it together was funny and relatable. The accents were really interesting because I promise you, I had no clue what they were saying sometimes. Nalini’s dialogues in Tamil were like immensely difficult to understand, and my Tamil is fluent. This isn’t a criticism... I’m fairly certain the difference is to do with the regional difference. American Tamil and Malaysian + rural Tamil slang are going to have huge accent differences so there’s no surprise that I found Nalini’s Tamil hard to understand.
I’m really really really meh about the Kamala and Manish/Mr Kulkarni thing. I still think she should sort it out with Prasanth maybe but I’m open to seeing where it goes. I might change my mind with it.
This show like any other show had its highs and lows. But I really really do feel that NHIE season 2 managed to truly figure out what the hell it wants to do and developed into a very strong and very entertaining show in terms of representation and diversity. I’m looking forward to season 3.
#nhie netflix#nhie season 2#nhie s2#nhie spoilers#nhie review#never have i ever#never have i ever season 2#never have i ever spoilers#i have a lot of thoughts#bear with me here
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ATEEZ as Yanderes! PT. 1/11
⚠️WARNING⚠️ : toxic relationships, mental, physical, and emotional abuse, mentions of death/murder, descriptive violence, kidnapping,
⚠️Disclaimer⚠️ : these are ALL FICTIONAL, and my OWN personal opinions and perceptions on the boys. Yanderes are NOT to be taken lightly or romanticized, these types of people are REAL and are/can be very dangerous. These kinds of stories are ONLY for entertainment. If you know anyone like this in real life, please get help!
HONGJOONG ⚖
Worship Yandere
"I'll do anything for you! I'll even kill for you! Please use me however you want!"
Hongjoong DEFINITELY strikes me as the worship yandere
Stalking would be highly likely
So he can know exactly what you like and don't like
Whether it be clothes, movies, your favorite historical event, it didn't natter
He took EXTREME action into knowing everything about you before he actually confronted you
When he first met you, he didn't just fall in love with your personality, but EVERYTHING about you
You didn't know but he was basically putty in your hands
Not that you would ever know
At first you were weirded out by him, due to him being so quiet, and his wandering eyes always staring at you
If you are upset, he will do ANYTHING to make you feel better
Someone at work/school made you upset?
You heard the news of that persons death the following week
You wanted a new pair of shoes that you couldn't afford?
Expect to have a whole closet filled with new shoes
No matter what you do, HE WILL NEVER hurt you
Like- ever
You could betray him, from the point of no return and he'd still worship you
Hongjoong doesn't care if you don't love him, he will still aim to please you at all times
He doesn't like killing people, he will only kill if they seem like a threat to you or your happiness
Doesn't realize he's being too clingy and possessive
But you say nothing in fear of hurting him
Hongjoong isn't that big of a softie once you get to know him
His cute, shy, and introvert persona would fade gradually over time
It was actually unnoticeable since the shift in character was cleverly planned out
Eventually you caught him in the act of beating up one of your friends because he was jealous that you were spending more time with them than with him
You called off your relationship immediately
He wouldn't fight you on the matter
But that won't stop him from secretly buying you things or taking care of your "problems"
SEONGHWA ⚖
Sadistic Yandere
"It hurts? That's your fault! Next time learn your lesson and stop looking at other men!"
I know exactly what you're thinking
"WOULDN'T THIS BE SAN?!"
I have thought about it, and to me Seonghwa strikes me as this type of Yandere the most
Seonghwa was also HIGHLY intelligent
He knew EXACTLY how to make you fall for him
It didn't matter how long it took
You were going to be his
Made sure to be your typical Wattpad fan fiction boy, whether you wanted him to be that "bad boy" or "good boy"
In the end he decided to try the good boy persona
When he met you, everything had to be perfect
He rehearsed lines ahead of time, and practiced until he had the courage to face you
It was at a summer carnival event, he helped you win a prize at the strength game
From the moment you looked into his eyes, you were putty in his hands
After almost a year of knowing each other, and a couple months of dating, things were going great
That was, until you decided to hang out with your old friends from high school
You invited Seonghwa to be your date to the gathering, and it was hell for him
The way you completely disobeyed his unspoken rules of talking to other men that wasnt him
The final straw that made him break his character was when it was time to leave and you have your male friend a big hug while giving him that smile that makes Seonghwas heart melt
When you got home he grabbed and dragged you to the bedroom
"Seonghwa what are you-"
SLAPPED YOU DEAD ACROSS YOUR FACE AND DID NOT GIVE TWO FUCKS
"WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!"
*SLAP*
"STOP IT WHAT-"
He smacked you a couple more times before he pushed you on the bed and decided you needed a lesson
Would torture you, sexually or plain physically
Don't scream or beg, it only fuels his drive to punish you
Will not stop until HE beileves you learned your lesson
YUNHO ⚖
Self-Harm Yandere
"Hey... look at me... look at me... look, there's so much blood coming out..."
Through your relationship, Yunho was pretty normal
Until you accidentally forgot to give him his goodnight kiss and hug
It was ONE night, because you were so exhausted from working/school and you passed out on the couch
In his mind, that one mistake told him that you didn't love him anymore
This Yandere has two sub units
One where they start harming themselves in private, and the second one, harming themselves openly
Yunho started off doing it privately
He planned this strategically
When you noticed cuts and bruises on his wrist the next day, you questioned him frantically
To which he nonchalantly explained that he hurt himself at the gym
But you weren't an idoit
You KNEW these particular kinds of injuries were caused by self harming
But you didn't press the issue because you assumed it was a sensitive topic for him, and didn't want to trigger him
Yunho began to lose trust in you
He was scared you would end up leaving him one day
All because of that ONE night
Even though after that one night, the normal goodnight kisses and hugs continued
But to Yunho it wasn't the same
So when you came home one day later in the evening, you and Yunho got into an argument
A very HEATED argument
It ended up with you saying his WORST FEAR
"If you don't stop this right now, we are over !"
That's when he snapped
"You're breaking up with me?!"
"If you don't stop acting like a selfish jackass then yes!"
Honey that's all he needed to hear to send him into a frenzy
He started punching himself in the face, to the point where his mouth started bleeding
"YUNHO WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! STOP IT!"
He ignored you and then grabbed a sharp knife from the kitchen and sliced all over his arms, legs, torso, and face
You began to cry, and fear for your life
You backed up and was about to dial 911 when he yelled out,
"YOU CAN'T LEAVE ME! I'LL KILL MYSELF! DO YOU HEAR ME?! I'LL DO IT RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU!"
You acted quickly and raced over to him cautiously trying to get him to stop
"Yunho baby I'm not leaving you!"
"LIAR!"
"Honey I didn't mean what I said! We were arguing and I just said something cruel but please know that I won't leave you ever! I love you."
"YOU PROMISE?!"
"I promise now stop hurting yourself please!"
Yunho did what you asked and then started to break down and cry
You engulfed him in a big hug and whispered sweet nothings into his ear
All the while, Yunho smirked, and smiled wickedly while crying
His plan worked
There was no way you were ever going to leave him now
Or so he thought........
YEOSANG ⚖
Stalker Yandere
"Do you ever get the feeling you're being watched?"
Yeosang is a man who likes to live off the radar
No one really seems him or acknowledges his existence unless he makes himself known
So stalking you everyday was no problem
You were oblivious to the fact he stalked you day and night
But that doesn't mean you didn't have any strange feelings
For the past three years you always had this sense of uneasiness
You didn't know how to explain it exactly
But you felt that you were always on the defense
Ready for something unexpected to happen to you
And not in a good way
Whenever you confessed these feelings, people would laugh and say that you're paranoid
And yes you were paranoid, because your psyche never lies, it's there for a reason
"I'm serious! Maybe I'm being stalked or something."
"Who would want to stalk you? You don't do anything."
A brutal attack, but the statement was true nonetheless
But that never set your psyche at ease
And the most fucked up thing about your whole "paranoia" was that Yeosang was in your life
He was your neighbor
And the two of you were quite acquainted
Granted Yeosang didn't exactly LIVE in that house down the street, but you'd never know
He would take run around the neighborhood for exercise and would stop to talk to you if he saw you
He played the role of the normal neighbor a little TOO well
Stalking Yanderes CAN be violent, but Yeosang wasn't
It would ruin his ability to stalk you in peace
He never hurt your, or the people around you
One day he told you a riddle that had you stumped completely
You loved when he told you riddles because it was like a little traditional thing whenever you two say each other
"Everyone has it, but no one can lose it."
This riddle had you stumped for days, and you didn't want to cheat by looking it up online
So by magic chance two days later, at night when you were laying in bed in the dark trying to sleep, the answer hit you
Instead of getting giddy with excitement that you fianlly figured out his riddles like you usually did, it made you feel, puzzled
The way his voice sounded as he told you the riddle
The smile that was staining his face as he did, had your psyche going crazy
You needed to calm yourself, because it was just a riddle, nothing more, and nothing less
So you drifted off into sleep and mumbled the words,
"A shadow."
SAN ⚖
Training Yandere
"Say you love me... SAY IT, SAY THAT YOU LOVE ME! SAY IT!"
This is why I didn't label San as the sadistic Yandere
Even though he could have easily slipped into that category
But not with this one chile
Unlike the Sadistic Yandere, San doesn't like causing you pain, it hurts him deeply to see you in pain
A lot of Atinys (myself included) are so used to San being labeled as "the demon" or "possessed" when it comes to his stage presence or when it comes to NSFW AUs
But you need to remember that San is actually a bubbly, clingy little cupcake off stage
So that's why I stuck him with the Training Yandere
But you need to be trained, so he has no choice but to hurt you
He easily kidnapped you after breaking into your home and drugging your food.
You didn't know who San was, never saw him a day in your life
But San was convinced that you'd known each other for years
(I can also sense a tiny bit of the Delusional Yandere in this one, but like I said A TINY bit)
In the basement you were, chained to a chair like an animal
He came skipping down the stairs happily and had a plate of food for you
"Now you can eat if you say the magic words."
"Please?"
San chuckled at your response
In normal situations yes that is the magic word, but San said "words" not "word".
"No that's not it."
"Well then what it is?"
"You know what it is silly."
The confused look on your face made San beileve you were lying, and that you were just being a brat
He hated brats
"Alright I see you're still going with this-"
He brought out his bag filled with torture equipment
And that's when you lost all sense of reality
You kept telling yourself that you were dreaming
It was the only logical explanation for this situation
"Awe don't cry, just say the magic words and you can be free of your restraints."
"....."
"The magic words are "I love you".
"ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?! I DON'T LOVE YOU! I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU!
(Y/N why couldn't you just play along tsk tsk)
"Oh boy, I was hoping we wouldn't have to do this."
The first tool he got out was a hammer, a big, hammer
And he released one of your hands only to hold it down on the table next to him
"You have ten fingers, let's see if you can say the words before we get to ten."
He aimed for your pointer finger and slammed the hammer down on it with all his might
"One."
You screamed bloody murder as you felt the pain shoot through your body
But you still didn't say anything
He slammed the hammer on your middle finger
"Two."
You still didn't say anything, how could you with all the pain you're in
The next finger
"Three."
No response
The next finger
"Four."
No response
San was getting frustrated, but didn't show it
He eventually broke all ten of your fingers, and was amazed at your strength of not giving in
But that's just the more violent he had to be
Next on the list, was your face
He slapped and punched you repeatedly, blood getting everywhere and your vision becoming blurry
But you STILL didn't give in
San had enough
He grabbed a knife from his bag and held it at your feet
This was also the final straw for you
You can live with broken fingers, but not feet
"SAN! I- I LOVE YOU!"
"What?"
"I'm sorry for being a brat, please forgive me! I love you!"
"Oh darling! I knew it!"
Of course you were lying, but he didn't know that
#ateez#ateez imagines#ateez yandere#ateez scenarios#ateez mafia#ateez smut#ateez jongho#ateez wooyoung#ateez seonghwa#ateez yunho#ateez yeosang#ateez mingi#ateez san#ateez hongjoong#ateez au
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Mcr history
[B]MCR HISTORY IN DETAIL:
This is MCR history it is long and in details. This is different since I'm adding many details that not many people know. Hopefully you will enjoy this. I worked hard on this. These I found in websites,videos,fandoms,MCR magazines,etc. From baby to today but by dates.
[B]Babies/young kids:
[I]Gerard way/Mikey way :
Gerard Way was born on April 9th 1977 in New Jersey. He is half Italian. He later on had a back problem that affected him for the rest of his life (scoliosis) Gerard is allergic to cats. Mikey way was born September 10th 1980. Gerard and Mikey were very close to each other. They became best friends. Gerard and Mikey couldn't go outside and play with other kids since new jersey was very dangerous with murders and kidnapping happening often so Gerard and Mikey would just play with each other. Ms Way said that when Gerard ran mikey try to learn to walk but instead he try to run but he fell on his face. Gerard and Mikey grandma help them get into art she would give them papers and markers for them to use.
Here is baby Gerard and mikey:
[IMG=STQ]
[IMG=KJ5]
[IMG=M8K]
[I]Frank iero:
[IMG=UBP]
[IMG=I87]
Frank was born on October 31 1981 in New Jersey. Who has Italian in his blood. Frank was a only child. His parents divorced when he was very young.Frank's dad and grandfather played drums in their own band. Frank went to the hospital a lot and had lots of health problems he had ear infections, broncadus and he has a weak immune system he also had asma. Frank became a vegetarian when he found out about animals getting killed so he decided to not eat meat anymore.
Frank visited his dad only in the weekends he would take him to bars so Frank would watch him play. Frank's mom was poor she couldn't even buy milk which was said by Frank.
[I]Ray toro:
[IMG=2LH]
Ray toro was born on July 15 1977 in New Jersey. He is Puerto Rican. He has 2 older brothers. Ray couldn't go outside to play with kids since new jersey was too dangerous.
[B]Kids:
[I]Gerard way/Mikey way:
[IMG=12Q]
[IMG=LA9]
[IMG=40Y]
[IMG=PIN]
Gerard and Mikey went to the same schools. Gerard would often draw since he loved to draw. Gerard and Mikey often share music to each other. Gerard was bullied badly at school that he had to change school. Gerard joined to be part of a play at his new school he was Peter Pan. He sang his part on stage. Later on middle school started and Gerard and Mikey stayed in the same school but they both deal with bullying.
[I]Frank Iero:
[IMG=HHZ]
Frank was bullied often at school. He went to hospitals often still. He is very close to his mother. Frank's father made Frank try to plays some drums but he didn't want to play drums he wanted to play guitar so they gave him a guitar he played a few notes. frank self taught himself.
[I]Ray toro:
His older brother knew how to play guitar he would often give CDs for Ray to hear. His brother taught him how to play guitar and Ray learned guitar.
[B]Teenagers:
[IMG=ZJE]
[I]Gerard Way:
Gerard Way learned to play a little bit of guitar. he gotten really good at drawing. He joined a band in high school but he got kicked out for not playing a song they wanted. He also wasn't good at guitar. So Gerard and a friend of him made a comic book together. But some how they couldn't sell it in a comic book store. Gerard spread all summer copying another art style of another comic book but soon he made his own style. Gerard was still bullied at school.
[I]Mikey way:
he dreamed to be in a band and it was always his dream.
[I]Frank Iero:
Frank played guitar well he would often get beaten up at school. Frank created a band called pencey prep with his school friends.
[I]Ray Toro:
Ray toro became a pro guitarist he learned to play metallica songs.
[B]Young Adults:
[I]Gerard:
He went to art school after he finished high school. They taught him some things. Gerard met a friend who introduce him to Ray Toro. Gerard art did well that he worked for cartoon network to make a tv show. Gerard was drawing for a show He was working on a show called the breakfast monkey show. Gerard and Ray made a song together for the show. The intro of the song. On September 11th 2001 Gerard went to New York for a final meeting for the tv show. On his way to the meeting he saw a plane hit a tower. Then another plane hit the other tower. Gerard watched people around him cry and with fear but Gerard said he didn't sad. He was afraid of what was going to happen to the world he though are you happy where your life is right now. Is this really important. So the meeting was canceled. Gerard went home and wrote the first MCR song "Skylines and turnstiles". Gerard met Oliver who worked at a bar he was his friend and he often chatted with him. Gerard asked him if he could be part of his band he was making.
[I]Ray toro:
Gerard called him. Ray haven't seen Gerard for a while since Gerard was always in his house avoiding human contact. He asked Ray if he could be part of his band. He told him to come over to check out what they were making he didn't have to join but he wanted him to come over. So Ray went over to Oliver's house. Gerard showed him the song he was making Ray joined the band.
[I]Mikey Way:
Mikey heard of gerards band. He heard their music and he loved it that he took bass classes and joined the band.
[I]Gerard way:
The band created a few songs then they went to eyeball records they were outside their door and they asked them if they could be signed they gave them their music for the label to hear. The label loved it so they signed them. A radio host who was there heard of the band and he said he will put them on the radio which he did and it gain them fans.
The band didn't have a name.
Gerard and Mikey worked in Barnes and novel. Gerard worked in the music area while mikey worked in the book area. Mikey one day looked behind a book and the reviews said tales of chemical romance so mikey thought what if you put my in front of it. Mikey told Gerard his idea and Gerard loved it he thought it fit the band with their music and the band in general.
[I]Frank iero:
Frank worked on a album for pencey prep once he was done they sign with eyeball record and started to do tours. Frank once went to a party and he saw a woman fighting with another woman she punch the girls face. Frank fell in love with the girl that girls name was jamia.
Frank heard of MCR since the label would gave random CDs to the bands part of the label. Frank said we often hear Mcr demos in the car when we go around town to do shows.
[B]Bullet era:
Gerard went to a bar with mikey and Alex from eye ball. They went for a drink. Gerard saw pencey prep playing their show. Gerard Said he was amazed by Frank who was destroying the stage with the energy he had he looked like he was playing for thousands of people and that was what the band needed. Gerard knew they needed a new guitarist since he couldn't play guitar. He met the kid and they became friends.
Pencey prep would often travel to many states in a podcast Frank said that pencey prep would work on their music in each other's parents basement. They rented a building in a warehouse which was shared with other bands they knew mcr during this time. They would play music in a small room in that place even one of the band members live in that place with some other band member of a different band. One day one of the members of pencey prep broken down the wall of the room they played in to make it bigger since it was 2 separated room they made it to one big room and that is where mcr did their album and other bands pencey prep invited. Gerard and Frank painted in that room together at night and the chemicals of the paint had made both Gerard and Frank high. They later on blame that another band that run a party and made a big mess broken down the wall and lying saying that they didn't actually break it. They did get away with it.
*casual interactions on YouTube podcast*
Later on Pencey prep tour with Thursday and MCR. MCR was poor but Frank was nice enough to let them use the back stage room.
MCR played a few shows and gain fans. The radio host said fans were obsessed with vampires will never hurt you.
They often ask him to play it.
MCR were recording bullets but Gerard had a teeth problem and also anxiety. His tooth hurt him so much he would hit his head on the wall,bang his head on a car hood and he would cry and scream so badly that he often went to the hospital. He also had fear. He was going to give up he said "I can't do this anymore" the producer yelled and slapped his face to get his shit together and do the recording. Gerard later on got surgery on his tooth.
Pencey prep broken up
[B]I am a graveyard
Frank's band that didn't go as great as pencey prep. Only three members of pencey were in this band and one of the members of pencey left. They played a few shows but then they broken up.
Gerard asked Frank if he could join the band since they needed a guitarist and Ray couldn't play every guitar part. Frank said yes you guys are my fave band. MCR created have already created a few songs without Frank but 3 songs on bullets had Frank in it. Like early sunset over Manhattan for example. Ray and Frank said their ways are different Ray was more the metal kid while Frank was the punk rock kid but it worked. Frank could play parts Ray couldn't play and Ray played parts Frank couldn't play.
I brought you my bullets you brought me your love was released in 2002. The radio host played the album on the radio. MCR opened for Thursday,taking back Sunday. Fans loved MCR and they gain fans. Soon MCR traveled outside the state's Gerard and mikeys grandma brought them a van for tour.
The band went on tour as they played for fans in small venues. Even the place was too small for the fans since many people wanted to see them. Brian their tour manager made Gerard meet the used. He met bert and thought he was crazy but they later on became good friends
(Very good friends they became boyfriends)
Gerard started drinking and doing drugs with bert. Frank and jamia became girlfriends and boyfriends. MCR were poor they didn't have much food or clothes. They said they were used to a hungry stomach. But other bands were kind enough to give food and clothes to them. Their album didn't make it to record stores. So fans didn't have a way to buy the CD it was limited. MCR didn't even have merch to sell. Gerard made his own merch called thank you for the venom.
MCR became more popular.
Gerard was sexually confused
In 2003 there was a party mcr attempted. This was planned. It was filmed.
Frank was with Gerard and jamia next to him.
A guy was fighting Gerard. Frank fighted the guy to protect Gerard he ran after the guy but Ray stopped him.
Gerard and bert tour together and they made a song.
[B]Revenge era:
Gerard and mikeys grandma died. Which affected the band they made a song for her.
Warner brothers wanted to sign MCR but they rejected many labels they soon said yes to them. The band gotten a tour bus.
They had a producer named Howard who helped them create a album the band would create something and they think he will like it but he hated it he told them what is this going to be, what are you saying. They soon made songs he would like.
Once the album was done they kicked out Oliver when they finished the bullet tour. They kicked him out for not playing well he didn't want to use drum beats. He mess up often when playing so they kicked him out. They gotten Bob who he played in other bands as a dj and they didn't know he could play drums. Bob is from Chicago. He was all about tech and that is what the band needed. He joined the band.
Gerard was on his worst of the drugs and achohol that it made him sick he was very depressed and suicidal they were going to finish the album when Gerard was going for a walk and he wasn't seen for 2 days Frank was asking for help for people to find him.
Gerard was found.
Gerard said he did men favors for cocaine.
(Gerard and Frank started to be more than just friends they became boyfriends. Frank was a swinger so he had both Gerard and jamia. She seem ok with it because if she wasn't Frank wouldn't date Gerard. This is part for the frerard shipper)
Three cheers for sweet revenge was release they started touring. They went to Europe and Japan. While in Japan Gerard was getting worst he was throwing up so much. He once throw up for 45 mins then he said he was done.
Gerard became clean.
Their first music video was made it was I'm not okay and they gotten popular the shows gotten bigger they played in bigger venues and outdoor concert places.
MCR were always dirty they couldn't shower for many days and they smelled bad their clothes were always dirty. They toured with fall out boy for a while even Jimmy eat world and other bands. They were nominated in the vma.
The album gotten awards later on.
They did a world tour.
Gerard gotten a girlfriend named Ellie (aka the crazy fan)
[B]The black parade era:
The band were done touring they created some songs in the tour bus (I don't love you,teenagers) they wanted to stay in a cheap house. So they stayed in a haunted mansion. Mikey said he was feeling lost and depressed when they were on their way to L.A and the haunted house was making his problems bigger. The mansion name is called the paramour house. There were rumors of ghost and the place being haunted. Celebs would stay there often to make music or work.
[IMG=I4P]
They stayed there for 6 months.
Mikey didnt want to stay in the room upstairs so he stay on gerards floor. He often sneak from the bathroom to sleep on the floor next to Gerard. Some friends of theirs ask who had one of the rooms which was where Mikey was suppose to stay in and Gerard looked at Mikey in a joke kinda way but Mikey didn't want to say it. Frank stayed in a room away from the other rooms, Rumor said that the actor of friends ran out the room screaming. Plus a singer made a song with a ghost. Frank said the room was fine but he heard stuff that he thought was a raccoon and he said if it's actually a ghost she has a bad voice. Water would often suddenly start in bobs room. While they often hear door slamming and saw a few ghost around. Gerard was going crazy he was writing words on the wall. Ray was playing a random song that Gerard was mad at him for not playing a song for MCR. Ray played the song really fast since he was very stressed. Mikey left the house to see a therapist he was seeking help for his mental health. But he would come to the mansion to record songs. All the band had a problem with depression,anxiety,self doubt,and stress trama. The band often hear door slams and Mikey said he saw a few ghosts. Bob said in a interviews for the alternative press book that the band often had family breakfast. They played music in the ball room. Bob said we have a support room we would put up notes if we have a problem and we would talk about it. One day Bob went to rays room and he saw Ray brushing his teeth he was shaking. He asked him what happened and Ray said he saw a old lady ghost walking down the stairs.
Gerard gotten ideas he showed his idea to the band and they use it they recorded songs. One day they were trying to finish the last song. The band went to get coffee. Gerard was left alone thinking of ideas when they band returned Gerard created the song. They were inspired by his words. The band quickly left the mansion they were tired of it. They gotten a apartment that they stayed in for a while. The black parade album was made. Soon they started to tour. They first open up for muse in their concert in the U.K they were the first American band to play in that arena then they brought muse to tour with them in america.
They made a music video for famous last words but frank knocked Gerard which tore the muscle of his foot that he had to use a cane. There is fire in the video that Bob burned his leg he got a 2nd degree burn and the burn infected his face area that it enter his blood and he went to the hospital it almost went to his brain thankfully they saved him.
One day the band were in virgina with muse. Frank didn't go out for dinner since he is vegetarian and Gerard slept over that day (hmm it seems like something else huh)
Ray,bob,and mikey had dinner with muse matt,chris,and dom. They gotten food poison by the restaurant that both bands were sick for many days.
When they went to the U.K they gotten hate by the British people since the news said that MCR is a cult leader because one MCR girl ended her life. They treated MCR badly but they didn't care they won over them.
Frank often was sick on tour.
Then project revelation (Gerard broken up with his girlfriend) they toured with mindless self indigent,linkin park,blink 182,and the killers. (The most gay era for Frank and Gerard)
Gerard falling love with lynz. He broken up with Frank. A month later he married her. The frerard fight happened.
(Rumor said that Ray saw Frank sobbing in the bathroom)
Frank broken his toes that he had a cane.
Break:
Frank married jamia.
Ray married his girlfriend.
Frank created leather mouth.
While Gerard was making his comic books since revenge. The Umbrella academy comic book gotten awards. And Gerard was working on doom patrol while making more umbrella academy books. Ray had a kidney failure.
Frank had to remove his wisdom teeth since it infected his mouth that it made his mouth and nose bleed. He also had stomach pains that he would take pills for it.
[B]Danger days era:
The band had children (gerard,frank,and ray)
The band thought they were running out of ideas. They made a song for a movie then they try to make conventional weapons but they gave up on it they scrap it and they then made the danger days album. Basic off Gerard ways comic book series danger days the true lives of the fabulous killjoys. The band became superheroes. Once they finished danger days they kicked Bob out over drama something to do with mikey cheating on his wife with another girl that Bob bullied him. Gerard kicked him out of the band. They gotten Michael who they made him the new drummer.
The band went on tour around the world.
Soon they finished touring they kicked out Michael for stealing in the band he was stealing band stuff.
Gerard decided to break up the band suddenly he didn't tell Frank
Frank didn't know about the break up so he was confused. Mikey divoide his wife.
[B]MCR broken up.
[B]During the break:
Frank created death spells in 2012 before the break up happened. Below I posted during the break wiki and Frank's band history wiki.
Frank created another band called Frank iero and the celebration.
Mikey was very depressed he taken drugs and he overdose in them that he was in a coma for many weeks. This also made Gerard depressed.
Gerard made solo music he created a album and was touring around places. He became a vegetarian.
Ray toro made solo music he created his own album.
Mikey joined a band called electric century.
Bob became a real estate agent also a plane flyer.
In 2017 Frank created another band called Frank iero and the patience.
Gerard worked more on his comic books.
Mikey married his girlfriend.
Ray was unknown in this era.
Frank was touring around the world. he went to Australia his band were in the car of the parking lot in the airport when a bus ran the car over it pulled Frank a few miles away from the car the band went to the hospital. Frank broken his arm while everyone else broken their legs and arm. Frank can't play the same again so he can't jump around stage and play guitar for a long time if not his arm will hurt he did not have surgery. Gerard,Ray, and Mikey went to Frank's show. Once a year mcr would bring their wife and kids and have a barbeque together to talk about plans.
In 2018
Gerard was working on the umbrella academy tv show and his other umbrella academy book. Plus more doom patrol stuff.
Mikey was making his own comic books also his wife had 2 kids by this time.
2019:
Frank created a new band Frank iero and the future violents his album barriers came out may 2019. Gerard release the umbrella academy tv show plus his other umbrella academy books.
Mikey release more comic books for collapser.
Ray collab with Gerard with 2 songs for the umbrella academy. They are cover songs.
On Oct 31 2019,
Frank's birthday was happening and fans said happy birthday to him. Frank then said it's raining outside today I can't do nothing today so we have to do something else. Then Frank tease a image he was the first one to say mcr returned then the other band members did it too. So MCR reunion happened MCR is back on Halloween
On Dec 20 2019,
It was the first MCR show since the break up in California 2019.
Now in 2020 MCR are touring now but due to the virus the band has to move some dates.
More dates will be added.
Gerard Way is working on season 2 of the umbrella academy tv show.
That's all of mcr history hopefully you readed all of this. Hopefully you enjoyed this. I will update this page if anything new happens. Check out the other wiki. If I forgotten anything I will add it here.
Here is info you can find for some of these.
[IMG=E5W]
[IMG=8BA]
[IMG=YCT]
[IMG=HRP]
[IMG=LAW]
[IMG=U2O]
[IMG=FJO]
There is another video I can't find but I saw it ages ago.
The other details I got them from the book in the first photo which you can get in the alt press website it's cheap but they got stuff in there about the band.
Please check out the wiki below they are part of mcr history too.
Thanks for having the patience to read this wiki.
Please share it.
I will add pictures later to this wiki. This took me hours to make this.
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A problem I have with supernatural is how absolutely MASSIVE it is. And I don't just mean then number of episodes, but also all the themes, and references, and creators, and how it is both good and bad in equal capacity, and how annoyingly meta it is.... I feel like it's impossible to comprehend it all at once, and when I try to, my brain just vibrates and I lose an entire weekend. And it would all be so much easier if it had ended right, and I could have slapped a big ol' "RESOLVED" sticker on the box labeled Supernatural in my brain. But since it ended Like That™ I have to constantly think about it, and ponder it, and analyze the ways it's good and bad, and how I both love and hate it, and it drives me fucking NUTS. Add to that all the people still calling us delusional and crazy, even though we aren't, and for telling us we like a bad show, even though we DON'T, they just don't get it, and I always get so tired when I think about spn. And I just wish I could peacefully rewatch the show and be normal about it, but I can't. Anyway. I'm sorry to ramble at you, but no one in my life gets my obsession, but you relate, so I hope you don't mind. Hope you're having a nice day.
THERE THERE, anon. I’d offer you a warm beverage as well, but please accept the internet version. :’)
It’s been years since I resigned myself to the fact that I would never be normal about Supernatural. Regardless of how it had ended, even if it was just me and my spn Funko pops, I would’ve been trying my best to comprehend the entirety of the series on every level.
I started during s11 to organize my thoughts on a grand overarching theory of the entire series, backflipping through parts that required a more Mission:Impossible laser maze sort of approach to make them all fit. The result is a sort of sound-of-one-hand-clapping feeling. Some people meditate on their breathing, but I personally meditate on the grand unifying theory of the cosmology of a fictional universe, and find it just as effective now.
I hope someday you can rise above the brain vibration and achieve Supernatural enlightenment, or at least peace with the canon. But in the meantime, I’m always here, and probably always will be, happy to offer you warm biscuits and a sympathetic ear. <3
#nice things people say#we're all suffering one degree or another of winchester derangement syndrome aren't we#Anonymous
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Going in blind: Watching season 3 for the first time. Random thoughts.
Episode 1: I know in the original series She-Ra was the sister of He-Man so I'm curious how much of that will be carried over to this series. Not saying He-Man has to make an appearance, same as how Batman didn't need to show up in Teen Titans. That was Robin's story, not his, and similarly this is Adora's story, not Adam's. Regardless, it makes sense why Hordak was so annoyed with the baby Adora in Shadow Weaver's flashbacks. To SW, there was something different and special about the baby, but to Hordak, whom seems familiar with the world before Mara separated Etheria from the rest of the universe, including Eternia potentially, Adora is just another "First One" child like he's seen many times before. Special in comparison to those who only know Etheria.
Great clap-back from Catra to Hordak, and not entirely unfounded. It's debatable how much he actually cares about conquering Etheria. He has others leading his forces in his war yet all his focus is on his portal creation.
According to Entrapta, productivity of the Horde is up 400% ever since Catra became Hordak's 2nd in command. I wondering how much of that is Catra's direct doing? Is she genuinely just that good of a commander? Is it because she's properly delegating and Scorpia has been handling most of the load? Or is this just because it's in comparison to Shadow Weaver? Entrapta said Catra's focus on First Ones' tech has been greatly aiding them and SW definitely focused more on magic, which was an aid mostly to herself since everyone else in the Horde seems to fight only with weapons and technology. And most of what she saw of SW while she was Hordak's 2nd was her being obsessed with bringing back Adora rather than fighting the war.
Episode 2: Let's see... Hordak's easily an adult and Entrapta is...[checks google] late twenties, early thirties. Oh good, then let's sail this ship!
But yeah, that was a heck of a backstory for Hordak. This reminds me of a video by a Youtuber named Savage Books comparing the villain Steppenwolf in the theatrical and Snyder Cut versions of Justice League and how, while he still wasn't a great villain, just a small addition made him a much better villain, that being a failure in his past and the desire just to go home. And in this case, Hordak is the much better, or at least way more developed, version of that. One of many clones of Hordak Prime but having a defect that labelled him a failure and had him cast out to Etheria, a "backwards world" as he's called it before. If he can conquer Etheria, perhaps by building a portal that'll bring forward Prime's army, he believes that'll prove to Prime that he is not a failure and that he can return home to rejoin his forces. Just this bit of backstory adds SO MUCH to Hordak, including new insights on his past interactions, and keeps him from being a flat character like theatrical version Steppenwolf. His lack of tolerance for failure makes sense when he himself is trying to prove that he's not. It gives him compelling motivation to want to conquer Etheria beyond just power and greed. Not motivation you're meant to agree with but one you can still understand.
I like the story with Huntara too. It's a nice little tie-in to something Adora was talking about with Glimmer and Bow last episode. Adora defected from the horde, not because she was different but rather very much in spite being very much like every other soldier there. She wanted to believe Shadow Weaver may have at least some goodness in her too and now we have Huntara as a fellow defector who realized the evils of the Horde, even if she chose to stay out of the war entirely after.
Episode 3: I legit thought Catra stabbed the goat lady for a second.
After Scorpia asking her why don't they just stay in the wastes I'm seeing a bit of a parallel between Catra and Hordak. They've both found a place where they can be the top dog, where they can do and have basically anything they want; her with the wastes and him with the Horde. They can be happy. ...But there's still this pull they're feeling to somewhere else. Catra back to the Horde and Hordak back to Prime. Because they feel they have to prove something; prove that they're not failures. They could be happy but they can't let go.
And that scene between Adora and Catra at the end. That was such a great line read from Catra's actor. "She left me for you. Everything that's happened is because of you." I got chills.
Minor note: While I'm only judging off the Mara hologram, which didn't have color, I do think the She-Ra outfit looks better with pants than shorts like Adora's She-Ra form. I think it makes it look sleeker, if that makes any sense.
Episode 4: Catra's spiral has turned into a drill and its taking her down as far as she can go. Though something I had to a laugh a little at myself over was that my biggest "Catra, no!" reaction wasn't to her wanting to open the portal but rather when she lied to Hordak and said Entrapta let the princesses in. She was actually a positive influence on Hordak's life and Catra with one move just destroyed that relationship and all progress Hordak had been making.
I'm guessing there's going to be some kind of long-term effect from Shadow Weaver continuously siphoning off Glimmer's magic. The woman is basically a parasite and the magic she uses is very different from the kind Glimmer does. I can't believe it never occurred to me that since Shadow Weaver trained Glimmer's father there might be a connection there between the two of them later in the story. While we don't know about anything that might've happened after she left, SW clearly had enough affection for Micah still to not kill him. I could see her trying to take Glimmer on as a student later like she did him.
Episode 5: There is something kind of hilarious about it being Scorpia's jealousy of Catra and Adora's closeness that causes her to be the first one after Adora to pick up that something is off.
11 is my favorite of the Doctor Who Doctors so naturally I'm comparing all this to the crack in Amy Pond's bedroom wall. Whatever goes in gets forgotten about and basically never existed. Though does that mean Bright Moon isn't going to remember the Horde? Basically that entire place got sucked up in the collapsing reality. There shouldn't be at war anymore because their enemy literally no longer exists.
Adora and Catra had their own little Star Trek 3 moment there.
Adora: "If we don't help each other, we'll die here!"
Catra: "Perfect! Then that's the way it shall be!"
Catra's just so far down her spiral she doesn't even care about getting her own win, just so long as Adora doesn't get one, despite just minutes ago clearly loving having Adora back in her life and on her side, to the point was trying to resist remembering the old reality. Her "perfect" world was them together again but when given the chance (another of many. I love those cuts to their past woven in there) she slapped the hand away.
I'm sure I'm wrong but I'm starting to theorize Madam Razz is actually Mara and just at some point went kind of crazy and started thinking as and Mara were two different people.
Episode 6:
"You are everything I ever wanted in a son. This... This is everything I ever wanted in a life. ...But I've got responsibilities, Van. And...I have to...go now."
-Superman, Justice League Unlimited: For the Man Who Has Everything
That was my favorite episode of JLU, where Superman is trapped in this world that isn't real but still perfect in every way, and the only way out was to give up everything he'd ever wanted, including a son he remembers watching grow up, even if it never really happened. With a similar premise, this definitely helped elevate Angela up a bit for me, whom I was kind just meh with before. I didn't dislike her but I didn't really care much for her either. This episode gave her a lot to work with though, with the heavy sacrifice she made. Not just saying behind to pull out the sword but just simply forcing herself to accept her husband is gone and not coming back. I was right that they wouldn't remember the Horde, but I definitely didn't think of the full effects of them never existing. They never exist, Bow never becomes a rebel instead of a scholar like his dads wanted. They don't exist, Micah never dies in battle against them. Glimmer gets to grow up with her father in her life. Everyone, most especially Angela, has to reject everything they would love to be real in favor of what actually is.
I'm guessing we're going to have Shadow Weaver taking advantage of this situation, trying to act like a teacher and mother-figure to Glimmer now that she's basically a orphan.
I talked before about how Catra and Hordak seem to have a parallel between them, especially regarding failure. Catra seems like she has a very hard time accepting her own failures and mistakes and thus why she more or less uses Adora as a mental scapegoat for all of it. Nothing is ever really her fault, it's Adora's, or Shadow Weaver's, or Hordak's. It makes for a great moment when Adora finally punches back, both literally and figuratively. She's not going to accept responsibility for Catra's actions anymore. She gave Catra every chance to make the right choice and she didn't, so now she has to finally live with the consequences. Heck of a glare She-Ra gave Catra at the end. Very much a "If I ever see you again..." and it certainly scared Catra, at least for a moment.
Now, someone go save Entrapta from Beast Island!
Season 3 verdict: Easily the best season thus far. I know this was technically the second half of season 2 but even in comparison to the full season 1 there was just so much that happened in this, so much that got revealed, and so, so many moments of emotion or tension. Weirdly I feel kind of disappointed that Hordak Prime is probably going to come in now and be the new big villain. I really like our Hordak's motivation and Prime seems like he might just be the generic conqueror for power that Hordak seemed like he was going to be at first. Not saying those types can't work. I love All For One from My Hero Academia and Frieza from Dragon Ball. Those guys are pure evil and selfishness, but they also have a captivating presence/charisma to them.
Naturally, since I bring her up the most out of all the characters, I'm very curious to see what happens with Catra now. She's basically nuked every positive relationship she had with anyone. Entrapta's gone, she threatened Scorpia, Hordak's not going to trust anyone including her anymore now that he thinks Entrapta's betrayed him, and Adora firmly sees her as an enemy. She has no one (those under her direct command don't count) and it's entirely her own fault.
Original Reddit post: https://www.reddit.com/r/PrincessesOfPower/comments/o0trfz/going_in_blind_watching_season_3_for_the_first/
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dear, my dear • jaebeom (4/4)
• pairing: soulmate!jaebeom x reader
• genre: romance, angst, smut
• warnings: cursing, smut, smut, smuuuut
• word count: 4.3k
summary: in a world where a touch can lock the doors of the heart, his voice opened the doors to your soul as he filled it with joy.
a/n: there is going to be an extra chapter, probably by the end of the week i’m gonna post it! and honestly idk what to say, just want to thank all of you who sent me sweet words about this fic and everything. thank you. hope you guys enjoy.
• • •
Nothing.
That was how Jaebeom felt about his life, at that time.
His days were gloomy. Sometimes, meaningless.
He didn’t have a lot of things that he appreciated that much anymore.
Jaebeom loved his cats, loved his cozy apartment and how it was the best place ever when he was watching his favorites animes and series, he loved to wake up every day and drink his coffee in peace, but even though he loved being alone, he didn’t like feeling lonely anymore. It was something difficult to understand, maybe if you ask him he wouldn’t be able to explain it in exact words, so he started making beats and writing songs. Developing art was the best way he could express himself.
Music was everything to him, he loved doing it and dedicating his life towards this specific thing. Music was everything that he had left, the only thing that brought something else to his life, and when the only thing he truly liked started to feel like everything else, he knew that his battle was almost lost. Doing music without a real meaning felt wrong and distorted, and that feeling burned the things left on his heart.
He was tired of pretending, every single comment about his songs felt hollow, it didn’t felt like he was changing somebody’s life with it, Jaebeom didn’t feel like he was doing a good job. He couldn’t even change his life with his own music, what else he expected? That was something he thought about a hundred times, at midnight. He couldn’t sleep that much, sometimes he didn’t even sleep. Those nights where his mind was too full with darkness and he couldn’t sleep, he would sit down on his living room floor and watch the stars, his cats by his side and the silence. Jaebeom missed his parents, living alone was not that great anymore, maybe he should give up and go back to his old life.
But then, life showed him that she was a tricky thing and you showed up to make him rethink a lot of things.
Your first words to him lighted up a fire that he thought was dead and gone. At least, at the end of the day, he changed your life with his music and he was happy about it. That happiness brought excitement, that excitement brought ideas and his mind didn’t stop crafting new lyrics, composing new songs. Inspiration showed up again.
Saying that you saved his life was something that he didn’t know if it was the right thing to say, but he could say that your faith in him made his own faith shine again. It all depended on him but yes, he could say that you saved his life too. You started him again, as a musician, then as a person.
Jaebeom never had intentions of knowing more about you because he wanted something, that didn’t even cross his mind back then, being friends with you didn’t even cross his mind either. But he felt like he could trust you, musically speaking so, of course, he would reach out for you when he felt doubts about the songs, you were good to give advice for these things. And after that phase, everything else came naturally, he didn’t even saw it coming.
For years, Jaebeom had walls too thin and too big inside him, protecting himself. He came from a broken home, broken childhood, he was too broken in every sense of the word but you came and broke each one of these walls and he had no idea of who were you.
Messages that once was just about his songs, started to be something else.
Just wrote this on my way to work, what do you think about it?
I’m not working as a teacher anymore, I received a proposal to work as a producer, isn’t that nice? I’m finishing that song, also.
I had a meeting with some people from a record label, and guess what? They offered me a deal as a solo artist, like, officially. I’m signed up! They want me to drop my album in 5 months!!!
oh, do you like animes? I just saw a really good one, you should watch it too.
just ate the best food in my life, do you know that red restaurant at itaewon? best pancakes ever
it’s so cold today, are you wearing warm clothes? don’t you get sick, ok?
how was work today?
At first, those things terrified him, a lot. The fast heartbeats every time he received a text from you, with your sweet or funny words, the way you took care of him even from a distance, brought an inexplicable sense of peace; made him feel so good that he knew it was over. He fought a lot of battles, every day, but against you… he could never win. With time, Jaebeom’s only wish was that he could see you, at least one time while he was breathing. He just wanted you to show up, wanted you to forget about your crazy deal and say “hey, let’s see each other?”. He was wrapped around your finger.
Jaebeom realized that his heart was yours.
Even when the girl from the subway made him feel kind of weird every Thursday, even though she was a hell of a beautiful girl, even when he touched her and his whole body wanted to run towards her.
His heart was still yours. And Jaebeom had no intentions in giving it to nobody else.
He could feel everything coming back to life with you, like a blooming flower, he could see the true colors of life once again. It was a slow process, but thanks to your push, he tried again and here he was. Destiny could give up, he wasn’t going to accept nobody else but you, that was what he imagined.
But then, just like it happened to you, nothing prepared him for reality.
Life and destiny had plans for both of you, an unreal reality.
Especially, this specific reality where your sleepy face is resting against his shoulder, with your eyes closed, lips touching his neck giving gentle kisses along his exposed skin, your arms wrapped around his waist, holding him dearly, he felt loved. He felt safe. He felt vivid.
Both of you were meant to be, and thinking about this he couldn’t feel more relieved. Soulmates. He didn’t have to worry anymore.
“It doesn’t make sense,” you broke the silence as you felt Jaebeom's fingers over the back of your neck, tangling in the strands of your hair. Both of you ran away from Jaehyun’s apartment and Mark’s confused face, you decided that you could explain everything later because your mind was off with so much information and plot twists. And right now, as your body is pressed against Jaebeom’s toned chest, laid on your bed, legs tangled in one another, nothing could feel more peaceful than this.
“What doesn’t make sense, baby?” Jaebeom asked with his lips brushing slightly your forehead. In the last thirty minutes, the word ‘baby’ became the thing you loved the most to hear, that word was never that powerful in your life before.
“The first time that we bumped into each other, it was early in the morning,” you reminded, putting your hand in his chest and resting your chin there, dangerously close to his face but you liked the way you could see every single detail of his sculpted pretty face and appreciate the brown galaxies on his eyes. “When you told me that you had found your soulmate, it was late at night. Around 9 pm. It doesn’t make sense.”
Jaebeom frowned, tilting his head a little bit to the side, like a confused dog.
“What you talking about? I sent that message to you right after I touched you at the station.” He said smirking. Now you were the one confused. “You seriously received the message late night?” You nodded. “Wow...” He laughed, slapping his forehead. “We could’ve figured out that we were soulmates way sooner. Jesus… Nothing helped with us, not even your phone service.” Jaebeom closed his eyes and laughed.
“I can say that it was kind of my fault too, right? I mean… The whole ‘please, don’t tell me your real name I don’t want us to get attached’ was king of stupid because I was already attached to you, but I was also scared. Like a lot… I didn’t like the idea of falling in love with you but being the ‘love’ of somebody else, you know? If we weren’t meant to be together then I couldn’t let those feelings flood my heart. It was a silly decision.”
“It’s okay, baby. I was scared too. I was in love with somebody I didn’t know, how messed up was that? How could I feel something for somebody like that, through texts?” He gave you a fond smile, tracing circles on your cheeks with his thumb. “I tried to hide it for months, but every day it was torture. I wanted to see you, to hug and kiss you, comfort you when you were stressed, I wanted everything with you but I had to respect your decision, I had to put myself aside and think about you. I loved you in silence because I didn’t want to cross a line and end our friendship, I didn’t know if you felt the same way but I wished that, a lot. It’s okay, baby. It was always okay. Today I am more in love with you more than I was yesterday... We lost a little bit of time but it’s fine, we still have time now. We will make up for the time we lost.” Jaebeom said brightly, hugging you even tighter, pressing several kisses on your face, making you giggle like a child.
Both of you kept talking through the night, while all the city lights got out and only the darkness embraced the midnight.
The intimacy that you two had through the phone, spread through the moment, both of you felt comfortable enough to take off your shirts and you felt comfortable enough not feeling ashamed of it, still laying down with him, pulling one leg around his waist, getting yourself more comfortable around him. His fingertips tracing a path across the skin of your thigh around his waist, running his palms in circles, back and forth, slightly squeezing your skin each time. Your lips touching his collarbone, while your hands ran through his neck, scratching your nails in his nape to his broad shoulder.
His hands on your body were taking away all of your self-control, and he was barely doing anything. But the fact that he was this close to you, was enough to make your body shiver and the sleepy feeling was away.
Leaving aside the rest of your sanity, you took the leg that was on his waist a little further, supporting your body weight on your knees on top of his waist, taking your two hands to both sides of his face, kissing him hard while feeling his hands travel a path from your thighs to the end of your spine, pulling your body closer, raising both hands to the back of your neck while his forearms kept you attached to his body. Your teeth bit his lower lip, pulling it lightly, while tugging hard the soft hair at the end of Jaebeom's nape, just enough to make him sigh deeply.
“We can slow down, baby… I told you. We have time. There’s no need to hurry.” He said with eyes closed, chest heavily going up and down.
“There’s nothing to slow down here, Jaebeom. I know we have time, but I don’t want to slow anything down, not anymore.” Your voice expressed so much determination that it made him growl and throw his head back like you were tearing down each string of his sanity away. You took the chance and brought your lips towards his exposed neck, touching his skin with your tongue and teeth, gently sucking and biting the skin. You could feel the shiver through his warm body, running your hands through his chest until his hips, digging your nails into his abdomen. He surprised you when his rough hands squeezed both sides of your ass, harshly, making you moan and distract yourself. He changed the position, throwing you on the bed, getting on top of your, taking both of your legs and wrapping them around his waist while he supported himself on his elbows, both of them on each side of your face, his lips sucking your earlobe, then his teeth biting your jaw a bit, running his teeth until the connecting of your neck and shoulder, biting there even harder, making you whimper and dig your nails on his neck.
“Let me take care of you, baby…” He whispered on your ear, in a husky and dark voice, pulling away from your skin just enough to look at your blushing face, running his thumb on your bottom lip, getting closer and sucking your lip between his, pressing his hips on yours, making you feel that specific hard part. “So beautiful… It’s so unfair that you can have so much power on me.”
His lips and tongue traced a path through the top of your breasts until you could feel his sinful tongue was underneath the fabric of your bra while his indicator finger hooked in the middles of your bra, pushing it down, enough to show your erect nipples, making easier for Jaebeom’s tongue do what it wanted to do. You sighed feeling his lips wrap around your left nipple, with his tongue circling it precisely, making your hips move unwittingly. His right touched the top of your clothed center, pressing his middle finger precisely on your clit. The moan that came out of your lips was probably the most sinful thing he ever heard, it was extremely pleasing to hear and know that he was the one causing it.
While his lips did the work on your upper body, his fingers pushed your wet panties aside and when he touched you there, he moaned on your nipple feeling the soaked situation down there. He sat on his heels, pulling away from you until he had a privileged view of his fingers on your pussy like he was mesmerized by that. His gaze on that part of you made your whole body hot, seeing his kind of lost face, appreciating every part of this, made you desperate.
His index and middle finger dragged your lubrication to your clitoris, massaging him in slow circles, making your legs shake and your waist lift for more friction, digging your nails into the bedsheet. Jaebeom added more pressure on your clit, sliding them towards your wet entrance, slowly pushing then inside, receiving another of your moan*.
“That’s right, baby. Be vocal…” He laid down a bit kissing your lips while pumping fingers inside of you. “Can I eat you out?” He asked in a whisper, making you roll your eyes and moan at the thought of it.
“Why would you even ask me that? Do you think I can be capable of saying no?” You whined, rolling your hips towards his fingers that were working slowly on you.
“Just wanted to make sure,” he said laughing and giving a peck on your lips, before going down on you. “Gonna make you come now, baby.” He promised with his head between your legs, eyes locked on yours while licking a long, hot stripe from your entrance to your clit, still moving his fingers in and out. The image makes you shudder. That devilish gaze was something that would burn on your mind for ages and centuries, the slightest quirk in his eyebrow implying that he knows that he will tear you apart with his tongue. You threw your head back, putting your hands on your forehead, ‘cause that sight was the hottest thing you ever saw on your life. His large hands wrapped around your legs, keeping you steady and his tongue stroke against your clit, his hand gripping your hip harder, suing his tongue mercilessly on you, core clenching around his two fingers that kept coming in and out of you, curving them deep inside you.
Jaebeom kept that same pace, driving you insane each time. His tongue twirling around your clitoris and his lips sucking it took you over the edge, and your walls tightened around his fingers, nonstop. Eventually, he lets you ride his tongue, rolling your hips back and forth as he buries his face further into you and sucks your clit gently, feeling your hands flown to fist his hair in your palms. He moans an appreciative, greedy sound as you cry out, sending the vibrations straight to your core. And Jaebeom works harder and faster until you are a sobbing mess. Your vision goes white as your thighs quake, short gasps coming out of your mouth, breathless, as you came around his fingers with your hips jerking into his face.
Even with a clouded mind for a few moments, you could still feel Jaebeom's fingers pulling your panties gently off your legs. His lips tracing a path back to your lips
“You good, baby?” He whispered with his left hand at the back of your neck, kissing you softly
“Wonderful.” You whispered back, opening your eyes and wrapping his waist with your legs again. “Wanna me ride you. Thought about that so many times, just listening to your voice...” You looked right inside his eyes, loving to see him roll his eyes.
“Don’t say something like that like this,” he growled, tugging your hair a bit. “Thought about that too. Even though you had no face in my fantasies, I thought about a lot of naughty things with you. Wrote many songs about it, the things I wanted to do with you. You gon’ ride me next time, but now, I want you like this. Under me.”
Did you feel his hand between you two, opening and pulling his pants and underwear enough to release his member, you felt his hard dick brushing against your wet core and moaned at the little friction. Jaebeom made sure to rub it on you several times, while his thick hands tightly gripped your ass, pulling you upwards, making the friction stronger and more needy for both of you.
“I want you like this every day,” Jaebeom whispered against your lips, positioning the tip of his dick on your entrance, entering in you slowly. “I want to make you feel good like this every day,” he gasped feeling your walls tighten around him as he moved slowly inside you, in and out. “Want to love you every day.” The head of his cock alone causes a burning stretch as it spreads you open for him, and his quiet moans making you shiver. He lets his forehead rest against yours whenever feeling you clenching hard around him with a particularly deep thrust, making you rake your nails down his chest in return.
You cling to him as you wrap your legs around his torso, the change in angle allowing him to hit deeper inside you, both of you panting, you feel him nip at your earlobe. You clench hard around him and he moans directly into your ear, and then you feel him throbbing inside you. Picking up the pace, his thrusts become harder and quicker, more precise as he lifted himself up a little more to look at you, admiring how your eyes would roll back every time. Jaebeom crashes his lips to yours, growling into your mouth as your walls clamp down around his cock, his hand going down on you to firm circles against your clit until you can’t take it no more. You come first, moaning against his lips, Jaebeom comes next, letting tiny whines out of his mouth, and praises at you.
You both stay like that for long minutes, as you come down from your respective highs, sharing lazy kisses as Jaebeom keeps himself laid at the top of your body while you hug him, giving a little peck in his neck. When he rolls to your side his arms wrap around your waist and once again your head is on top of his chest.
“Ok, now we really need to slow down. I have no stamina anymore.” Jaebeom said pinching your ass. “Big spoon or little spoon?” He asks muffled against your skin, with his face stuck in your neck.
“You want to sleep already?” You ask making him look at you with a pout.
“What do you have in mind to keep me awake? It’s past midnight, baby. You need to rest.”
“I thought about show off my cooking skills to you, making that pasta that I know you love,” you received a long and positive ‘hum’ in response as if maybe he was not that sleepy anymore. “And after that, I’ll ride you on my couch.” The nasty words coming out of your mouth make Jaebeom whine.
“Oh god, since when you are such a pervert?” He asked, turning on his stomach on the bed, his face hidden in his pillows, while his broad back exposed. “I love you so much, but I’m starting to think that you don’t really love me.” He lifts his face to the side and looks at you. “Not even three hours of real contact with you and you already have plans about killing me. Don’t know if I can take that, where’s my almost pure Lily?”
“So, you telling me you don’t want it?” You ask raising your left eyebrows.
“Never said that. I’m a hundred percent down, just let me pick the pieces of my soul and you can call me Khan, Mulan.” He answers quickly. “Yeehaw!”
“Oh god, don’t ruin Mulan with your dirty mind and lame jokes, Jaebeom!” You yell slapping his arm, laughing out loud.
“You are the one to blame, cowgirl.” He laughs too, showering you with kisses everywhere, as both of you roll between the sheets.
The following weeks went by radiantly for both of you.
Being close to each other, face to face every day made even more difference in your lives, even when you thought it was impossible to him more, day after day being in love was something that continued to be reframed in your life.
Both of you took small habits from each other. You now spent more time taking care of Jaebeom's five cats than he did himself, Jaebeom now had a habit of actually shopping and cooking, not just eating ramen because he was too lazy to move his own muscles.
You learned from each other daily, you learned more about each other, daily.
Now, you know how Jaebeom has the habit of getting up early and reading on the floor because it’s cooler there, you know how he scratched his face when he is irritated by some mistake in the song he is working on, you also know that he is fascinated with taking pictures, especially pictures of you.
You see and give him love in small gestures. You inspire him every day, to be a better and more grateful man. The support you give him is what keeps him going. He already lost count of how many times you stayed nights after nights sleeping on the sofa of his studio because he was worried about the release of his album that was going to be in 3 weeks. He would always tell you to go to bed and you would complain and tell him to shut up that you want to sleep, and he loved that you were even more stubborn than in the messages. He loved how you loved your friends, loved how you loved flowers and lived filling your apartment with jars and jars of it, especially of lily of the valley. He loved you and the way you made him appreciate life and its little details. Jaebeom loved you a little more, every single day.
So, when he asked you to live with him in his apartment, he never regretted it or thought he was going too fast. Now, seeing you carrying your stuff into his house, wearing one of his sweatshirts, he knew it was that. He wanted that for the rest of his life.
"Mark, watch out for my EXO cups! They're limited edition, if you knock them over I'll rip your lungs out!" He saw you yelling at your friend, pointing a finger at the red-haired guy and passing your finger on your throat right after.
"I'm helping you and you yell at me? Yell at Sunny too, equal rights." Mark defended himself, pointing to Sunny who was now placing several small boxes on Jaehyun's arm.
"Shut up, Mark! I'm listening!" Sunny responded by pulling her head out of the car.
"Everyone hates me around here!" Mark said placing the box on the pavement floor and placing both hands on his hips.
"I love you very much, but if you don't go up with this right now, I promise you that Yaya will be a widow even before she gets married." You threatened him one last time, throwing your sandals at Mark, who quickly grabbed the box and ran out to Jaebeom's apartment. Then, you turned towards Jaebeom, with the softest expression and a gentle smile on your face. "What is it, baby?"
He loved you even more now.
#dearmydearseries#jaebeom scenarios#jaebeom smut#jaebeom imagines#got7 scenarios#got7 smut#got7 imagines#lim jaebeom
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Boarding Update: New Digs & Lessons Learned
Well, November to early December was an interesting time for Mitzy and I.
Out of the blue one night during the beginning of Nov, my (now former) BO came up to me and told me I needed to find new boarding for my horse. That was a massive shock to me as my understanding of how our time there had been going didn’t give any indication we had anything remotely close to an issue. I’d not personally had any issues handling my horse and hadn’t heard of anything from the BO about her or her husband having a contrary experience. I had also explicitly written into my boarding contract that I wanted to be told of any difficulties in handling her so that I could address those in my training sessions with her. I had asked on countless occasions “Oh, how has Mitzy been for you guys?” and been told resoundingly how great she was.
/dnr
To then be told my horse was no longer welcome and that she’d reportedly been dangerous to handle was a huge slap to the face. I could hardly form a coherent thought at the time but did ask “How long has this been going on and why wasn’t I told earlier?”. Well I get a “We don’t tell boarders every little thing that their horse does” as a response before she launches into how apparently my horse was also destroying fences. I’m out there nearly daily, at least 6 days a week, and had never seen the fences in a state of disrepair. Maybe the chicken wire was bowed out a little, but that’s about it. Again, I ask how long has this been happening and why wasn’t I told. Allegedly “the whole time” and she’s tired of “fixing things my horse breaks”. If my horse was dangerous, I should be told immediately. Considering I’ve not had any issues leading my horse or handling my horse I’m not sure what I would’ve done to “fix” the behavior but I would’ve done something. Even if that something was only offering myself to personally do turnout for her. If my horse is damaging fences to such an extent, I should be told. I would’ve been happy to pay for fence repairs & offer my labor as well.
The more information I try to get the more the picture is coming together of my horse not being the issue (thank God). “Well you know how difficult she is to halter”--- no, my horse self-halters. “You know how she can be”--- no, I know my horse to be extremely easy to handle on the ground for a 2 year old. “Well since Fendi freaks out, she’s been galloping around, rearing, and bucking when it’s time to go in for dinner and she reared up on my husband when he tried to halter her today since I grab Fendi so he can get Mitzy and bring her in at the same time”--- your not a horse person husband is who has to go and get a 2 year old who is amped up by another frantic horse? After you’ve assured me that you or the girl in your employ would be the people to handle my horse since I was concerned about that? That seemed like a sound idea in your head?
I can’t discount the fact that all it takes for a situation to be unsafe is for the handler to feel it’s unsafe. If they’ve decided my horse is dangerous for them to handle then it doesn’t matter how she handles for myself, my friends, or experienced horse people. She’s dangerous for them. She self-halters if you stand at her side, but sure she’ll freak out if you come head on. She’s extremely easy to handle, but if she spooks it’s big and you need to not get scared of that. Or if she’s being feisty you just need to be confident in shutting it down and know how to handle a hot horse. She’s a 2 year old decently hot WB who recently shot up in size, it doesn’t matter how comparably easy she is to other 2 year old WBs if you’ve never handled one before.
So, knowing I couldn’t necessarily get her out immediately I offered a few solutions. A) Keep her stalled 24/7 until she moves or B) I can take her out in the morning and bring her in at night. “Keeping her in won’t fix her attitude.” Oh... so there’s the rub. There’s a fundamental misunderstanding in how we view horses and handling them. It’s not just unsafe for you to handle my horse because she’s big and you’re unfamiliar with hotter types, you believe in dominance theory and will hurt yourselves thinking you can be more stubborn than a 1200lb horse. Well, I can bring her in and out then. “She’s only a problem in the evenings.” Okay... well I will have her back in her stall everyday by this time. “I mean if you’re there that’s fine, but we can take her in.” ...Is this a horse you’ve labeled dangerous or is it not? Are you not kicking us out because you don’t think she’s safe to handle or not?
Well... luckily I secure new boarding pretty quickly but unfortunately it takes 3 weeks to move her. Not because that’s when the stall was open but because I’ve never had the opportunity to trailer train my horse. Takes three weekends of trying to get her in a trailer, hiring a shipper so we can get a bigger trailer, some dorm gel to take the edge off, and a literal crew of people to essentially walk her in a foot at a time. In the meantime, before the stars aligned and she finally went in a trailer, I am bringing my horse in before dinner and dealing with increasingly hostile behavior from my (now former) BO and some of the other boarders!
The whole situation has been absolutely bonkers to me because when I shipped her up to this facility I was under the impression that the BO was confident handling young horses. For the longest time everyone would love on her whenever they saw her, always calling her “the baby”, and the BO’s husband in particular would “smuggle” treats to her throughout the day (encouraged by me honestly). Retroactively, I can now see that at the point my horse sprouted up about a hand and had gained a deal more fitness from all her in-hand work... suddenly she was avoided like the plague. I also don’t understand why at no point was I told they had concerns handling my horse, especially around dinner time. I would not cared if my horse came in an hour early everyday so that they didn’t have to compete with the other horse that’s problematic to bring in. Which personally would’ve been the solution that was apparent to me as someone who has worked at a few barns. I also don’t understand how the horse who is a little too hyped up being brought in at dinner is somehow a worse horse to board than the _other _horse who gets crazy at dinner but also needs to be hobbled every single night so she can be stalled (otherwise she does her best to literally bring the walls down). If you’ve found a solution for that horse’s issues (bringing her in first & then hobbling her) then why is there no solution for my horse?
Had I know my horse was being handled by the BO’s husband at a point where her behavior is likely to be less than predictable I wouldn’t have been okay with it. I would’ve volunteered myself to bring her in if it wasn’t possible to simply have them bring her in early. I’d already repeatedly asked to know when the BO was gone at a show so I could bring my horse in from turnout because I did not trust a non-horse person with my 2 year old. No matter how well behaved I think she is, she needs someone who knows horses.
As far as issues with other boarders, they certainly was a contingency of people who seemed to purposefully slam the crossties into the wall when I was in the arena because it would spook my horse. Or similarly see that something was spooking my horse, make eye contact with me, and keep doing it. One woman very plainly made anything she did take about 3 times longer and be 10 times louder than normal if I was trying to work my horse. Notably suddenly choosing to pick out her horse’s paddock (the barn doesn’t do that and I was the only person who they’d ever had who’d asked if they could do that) while I was having some success loading & making such a ruckus that we lost all progress we’d been making. Was it everyone at the barn? No, but there were a few people being very pointed in their behavior and I think it legitimately came down to ye olde Western vs. English superiority complex. Since clearly I should be punished for my 2 year old not being dead quiet like all the semi-retired Quarter Horses.
I think honestly, that’s the entire problem of why we ran into this. This was never a boarding facility I intended to work long-term, I wanted to move Mitzy in the Spring to the barn she’s at now... but I think it ended prematurely comes down to the discipline clash. I think the BO, her family, and the boarders who are her personal friends just have extremely different expectations for how a 2 year old should behave than what I do and what the people I work for do. It’s still standard for AQHA/APHA/AHC to not only have horses under saddle at 2, but to be in a pretty rigorous show schedule (futurities require horses to be started at 18mo). A lot of people think TBs/QHs/QH types mature “faster” than other breeds. The way I’ve learned to regard young horses and the industry standard I accept for starting young horses doesn’t view 2 year olds as adults. Nor are 3 year olds treated to the same stanard as say an 8 year old. Do I absolutely expect basic ground manners and developing in-hand skills? Yes, but I also anticipate 2-4 year olds to be unpredictable! So I’m never surprised when they try to jump out of their skin when a leaf falls too close to them.
I am trying to see this as a learning experience and I think what I’ve learned from this is you really, really need to be compatible in your approach to expectations and handling as your boarding facility (no matter how temporary you plan for that situation to be). There are a lot of glaring issues with the magic of hindsight that point to this being an inevitable conclusion. I am really glad with where she’s at now! She’s at a dressage training/lesson barn that she’ll go into the program there once she starts under saddle. For now I’m just happy to be at a place where I can relax and enjoy my horse again--- plus I can take lessons at
#mitzy facts#do not reblog#anyway learning experience but I had an absolute shitty fucking november-early decemeber until my horse moved#i've also been blocked by this woman so i can't get the lunge line I accidentally left there so that's been real... fucking whack
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