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#alternatively what i have also been doing is opening up the image of them all in a row and looking at the character talking
averlym · 7 months
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character designs for podcast musical (musical podcast?) @perfecttimeseleven // notes on the designs below the cut
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hello there! usually i put commentary in the tags but i had too much to write this time.. thank you for clicking. have this uncoloured version as tribute. for ease of presentation i have once again made pptx slides :)
links for context: hcs and edits by CC @litanyofthemartyrs // scheherazade, [cc's px11 fic, incredible] // visual research sheets (under the cut) by me // the official art by @elliotly, which you can probably find on his tumblr(but is in too many posts for me to bother linking). enjoy!
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There's always a slight yearning in the back of my mind wishing I had been born in the right place, time, family situation, income level, etc. to have just lived in one single house for my entire life. Imagine being born in a place that still suits you, even through all of your personal evolutions and etc. The idea of deep familiarity with an area because you've lived and explored it for 40+ years, being encased in a web of memories and connections. Being able to clean out your old childhood bedroom and find personal artifacts, to dig in the yard and remember. I know those lives can still be plenty imperfect, but there's just something so seemingly solid and stable and Grounding about it that I sometimes wish I could have.. (At least from my outside perspective as someone who's moved around a bit geographically and even within the same area, never lives in the same house/ apartment /etc. for more than a few years usually.) Like... having a place that is printed upon, fully your own, rather than chronically a visitor, every thought of a space always tempered with the notion that one day soon you'll have to pack it all up again, etc. There's something peaceful about the permanence.
#I think also because I'm a very nostalgic person - THOUGH not in the way that somep poeple mean when they say nostalgia because I've realiz#ed that to some people apparently it means like.. more of a sad emotional thing? Or when I talk about being nostalgic they say 'me too' and#then describe how they're always depressed dwelling on the past wishing they could revisit it and replaying it and feeling sad and etc.#Whereas for me - it's not in a deep or emotional way at all. It's very detached - kind of like someone who is doing like a scientific#cataloguing of something? I don't feel any remorse or sadness or longing or sitting there sobbing for hours over people/pets I've lost or#etc. It's more like a fun contemplative excercise and extension of self analysis plus just documentation. Like I know your memory fades as#you get older OR even as stuff is actively ongoing humans have terrible recall - even the ones who are less emotional/more focused on#accuracy our minds still twist things or etc. SO I looove to have documentations of everything possible so that in the future I will have#as full and complete of a view of myself as I possibly can. sure the image will undoubtedly be a little distorted but having real evidence#of how something was at a time is very valuable. You look through old messages or letters or something and you always find other alternate#versions of yourself. Not in a worse way like inherently inferior Previous Models Of You who haven't yet been perfected but even just in a#neutral way like 'what they're saying is not a BAd thing but also is not how I would say that today.' etc. ANYWAY I find it really interest#ing to document and remember things and love revisiting the past - not in a sad way - but just like. curiosity. reminiscing and recalling#and filling in gaps. or trying to have the same feeling I felt at a previous time so I can remember what it was. Collecting information for#documentation purposes. Like for example - I would love to go back and tour all of my old childhood houses/apartments. Not to like#sit in the middleof them and cry and go 'ohhh my childhood waughhh' - but literally because I want to take detailed photographs so I#can remeber exatly what they looked like and recreate them in sims or some other digital way. Why? idk. just to gather the information. If#I ever live to like 80 years old and I'm still reflecting on my life curious about the dteails of it. I want to be able to fire up my#ancient windows 10 laptop I've kept all these years and open up the sims 4 and tour my old home with accuracy etc. ??#Not sure why really. Maybe an extension of how I generally care a lot about having an 'accurate' view of things? Like I would rather be#accurate than be happy. I don't understand 'ignorance is bliss' because I would always rather know. I always always in any situation am mor#focused on 'what is the well researched practical truth' than about 'how does this make me feel' or etc. Truth above ALL else even if it#were to make me miserable. Aka why I'm a 'boring' 'annoying' 'UM actually..' type of killjoy lol because it's very hard for me to understan#that some people can enjoy something or have a good time even not knowing the full facts of a situation or etc. BUT anyway. since that is#some core driver of my personality for whatever reason (just the plague of ennegram type 5 perhaps lol) maybe that also drives me to my#kind of minor obsession with like 'I must have a complete view and calatoguing of my life that is as accurate as possible within the means#i have' . Is it REALLY important for me to know the exact layout of on of my first childhood bedrooms? no. materially it does nothing for m#in life. BUT hey. it would make a great addition to the Accurate Life Story Catalogue lol. ANYWAY.. But I think a lot of wanting to live in#one place forever is not just the ease of documentation. but the sense of having a constant. Much of what i crave most in life is stability#& familiarity &routine bc of how my brain works. And it just would feel so good to be Settled. Never uproot again. One little place FOREVER
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lifehacksthatwork · 1 year
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Just a bunch of Useful websites - Updated for 2023
Removed/checked all links to make sure everything is working (03/03/23). Hope they help!
Sejda - Free online PDF editor.
Supercook - Have ingredients but no idea what to make? Put them in here and it'll give you recipe ideas.
Still Tasty - Trying the above but unsure about whether that sauce in the fridge is still edible? Check here first.
Archive.ph - Paywall bypass. Like 12ft below but appears to work far better and across more sites in my testing. I'd recommend trying this one first as I had more success with it.
12ft – Hate paywalls? Try this site out.
Where Is This - Want to know where a picture was taken, this site can help.
TOS/DR - Terms of service, didn't read. Gives you a summary of terms of service plus gives each site a privacy rating.
OneLook - Reverse dictionary for when you know the description of the word but can't for the life of you remember the actual word.
My Abandonware - Brilliant site for free, legal games. Has games from 1978 up to present day across pc and console. You'll be surprised by some of the games on there, some absolute gems.
Project Gutenberg – Always ends up on these type of lists and for very good reason. All works that are copyright free in one place.
Ninite – New PC? Install all of your programs in one go with no bloat or unnecessary crap.
PatchMyPC - Alternative to ninite with over 300 app options to keep upto date. Free for home users.
Unchecky – Tired of software trying to install additional unwanted programs? This will stop it completely by unchecking the necessary boxes when you install.
Sci-Hub – Research papers galore! Check here before shelling out money. And if it’s not here, try the next link in our list.
LibGen – Lots of free PDFs relate primarily to the sciences.
Zotero – A free and easy to use program to collect, organize, cite and share research.
Car Complaints – Buying a used car? Check out what other owners of the same model have to say about it first.
CamelCamelCamel – Check the historical prices of items on Amazon and set alerts for when prices drop.
Have I Been Pawned – Still the king when it comes to checking if your online accounts have been released in a data breach. Also able to sign up for email alerts if you’ve ever a victim of a breach.
I Have No TV - A collection of documentaries for you to while away the time. Completely free.
Radio Garden – Think Google Earth but wherever you zoom, you get the radio station of that place.
Just The Recipe – Paste in the url and get just the recipe as a result. No life story or adverts.
Tineye – An Amazing reverse image search tool.
My 90s TV – Simulates 90’s TV using YouTube videos. Also has My80sTV, My70sTV, My60sTV and for the younger ones out there, My00sTV. Lose yourself in nostalgia.
Foto Forensics – Free image analysis tools.
Old Games Download – A repository of games from the 90’s and early 2000’s. Get your fix of nostalgia here.
Online OCR – Convert pictures of text into actual text and output it in the format you need.
Remove Background – An amazingly quick and accurate way to remove backgrounds from your pictures.
Twoseven – Allows you to sync videos from providers such as Netflix, Youtube, Disney+ etc and watch them with your friends. Ad free and also has the ability to do real time video and text chat.
Terms of Service, Didn’t Read – Get a quick summary of Terms of service plus a privacy rating.
Coolors – Struggling to get a good combination of colors? This site will generate color palettes for you.
This To That – Need to glue two things together? This’ll help.
Photopea – A free online alternative to Adobe Photoshop. Does everything in your browser.
BitWarden – Free open source password manager.
Just Beam It - Peer to peer file transfer. Drop the file in on one end, click create link and send to whoever. Leave your pc on that page while they download. Because of how it works there are no file limits. It's genuinely amazing. Best file transfer system I have ever used.
Atlas Obscura – Travelling to a new place? Find out the hidden treasures you should go to with Atlas Obscura.
ID Ransomware – Ever get ransomware on your computer? Use this to see if the virus infecting your pc has been cracked yet or not. Potentially saving you money. You can also sign up for email notifications if your particular problem hasn’t been cracked yet.
Way Back Machine – The Internet Archive is a non-profit library of millions of free books, movies, software, music, websites and loads more.
Rome2Rio – Directions from anywhere to anywhere by bus, train, plane, car and ferry.
Splitter – Seperate different audio tracks audio. Allowing you to split out music from the words for example.
myNoise – Gives you beautiful noises to match your mood. Increase your productivity, calm down and need help sleeping? All here for you.
DeepL – Best language translation tool on the web.
Forvo – Alternatively, if you need to hear a local speaking a word, this is the site for you.
For even more useful sites, there is an expanded list that can be found here.
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strang3lov3 · 5 days
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You and Joel both know how he got that virus on his computer, and you can’t help but to relentlessly tease him in more ways than one…until Joel’s had enough.
Alternatively, Joel should really stop clicking on links that Tommy emails him. (7.6k)
Tags - neighbor!joel, grumpy!joel, pre/no outbreak, porn watching, joel straight jorkin’ his peanits, teasing, lingerie, handjobs, upside down blowjobs (like what happened in spider man), rough sex, manhandling, oral (f receiving), come eating, fingering, overstim, soft dom!joel, porn watching, reader has a bush but is otherwise not described Fic Help - @joeloverture, @joelsgreys, and @endlessthxxghts for their beautiful brains, and @noxturnalpascal and @beefrobeefcal for editing and patiently explaining dial up internet to me for this fic 🩷👾📀🖥️ Patti, I seriously cannot thank you enough. You made this fic fucking perfect. A/N - sorry for the delay on getting joel out to you in a timely manner, he should be cumming a lot more frequently…maybe. I do have a vacation I’m leaving for in less than a week. Also, thank you for all the well wishes and participation on my anniversary/5k celebration, I love you all so very much 🩷
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You know what you came here for. Grumpy, technologically inept Joel fucking the daylights out of you below 👇🖥️🦠🛜👾😍🍑👅💦🍆
It's early evening on a Saturday and finally time for Joel to enjoy his day off. He spent the day doing yard work, grocery shopping, and chauffeuring his daughter to and from soccer games. Saturdays are never really very relaxing for him, so when he has a quiet moment, like right now, he takes advantage. 
Joel draws the curtains closed in his kitchen as he stares at his computer setup and contemplates, even though his mind is already made up. It’s a sign - there’s a Victoria’s Secret coupon set that’s been sitting on his kitchen counter since this morning, addressed to you of course. Damn mailman can’t get anything right. 
He sits down on the chair in front of the monitor and powers the machine on, opens the tower’s disc drive and inserts his AOL CD before opening the matching AOL application. He has a post-it taped to the bottom of a drawer next to him that he reads from every time to remember his username and password. Joel grumbles to himself as he unzips his jeans, something about ‘damn thing’s always takin’ too long to load’ as the screen goes from dialing to connecting to connected. Netscape takes even longer to load, but when it finally does Joel visits his favorite website, victoriassecret.com. He works his half-hard cock in one hand, feeling it stiffen in his palm as the screen loads slowly, images of lingerie-clad models coming to life bit by bit. Joel groans and squeezes himself. 
He knows that jerking off to Victoria's Secret advertisements is juvenile at best. He knows other porn exists, he’s got old dirty Playboy magazines from his teenage years and even some bootleg VHS tapes that his brother Tommy copied for him. He’s tried to watch them, but they’re all sort of sterile and awkward, the dialogue fake and the women’s moans exaggerated and over the top, it takes him out of the fantasy. They can also only be played on the television in the living room, which is not ideal for a number of reasons.
 Joel also knows that the women in these advertisements are not real, that they’re airbrushed and photoshopped to the point of looking like Barbie dolls. He knows that they have more curves and body hair than what he’s looking at on his screen, that they have cellulite, stretch marks, and all of the other things he loves on a woman’s body. But Joel is nothing but a man, and a lonely one at that. A hard worker and a dedicated father, he doesn’t have much time for dating. And importantly to Joel, Victoria’s Secret advertisements allow him to do something his dirty magazines and bootleg VHS tapes can’t - use his imagination. 
Oh yes, Joel loves when a little mystery is left for him, to pique his interests. He loves to imagine what the model’s breasts look like, if they’re more round-shaped, or like tear drops. Would they hang heavy, swaying when she moved, or would they point outward, petite and perky? How dark or light are their nipples and what would they look like when hard? He loves to picture their vulvas, to visualize what their folds would look like spread in front of him, to envision how they maintain their pubic hair. He wonders what they look like when they’re wet, lips all swollen. It thrills him, excites him. 
His eyes are squeezed shut and he’s pumping his cock when a loud email notification from [email protected] interrupts him. “Fuckin’ Tommy,” he mutters, clicking on the popup. 
here’s this for your spank bank pervert 
No greeting, no goodbye, nothing capitalized and no punctuation. Just one blue link and nothing else. Joel rolls his eyes but clicks the link anyway, more out of boredom than genuine curiosity.
Just like before, it takes a moment to load but when it finally does, Joel blushes. It’s a porn site where people appear to upload their own porn. It seems expansive, all sorts of categories. Immediately, Joel’s intrigued - he didn’t realize that this kind of stuff was available online. He guesses that he probably should have known that, but rationalizes that he doesn’t use the internet much. His computer is meant for a few things - playing Microsoft Pinball, emailing clients, and browsing Victoria's Secret during times like this. But this - this might’ve just changed the game. 
From the thumbnails, these appear to be real people. People of all ages, from young adults to older lovers. Nudity plastered across his screen in all different shapes and sizes, a variety of lengths and cup sizes before him. There are people consensually exploring kinks and couples in love, everyone engaging in a variety of different sexual acts from solo stuff to threesomes to orgies. This has it all, gay, straight,  and everything in between. After scrolling through, Joel notices that there’s a little magnifying glass to search for whatever one may fancy. Joel clicks on this and he first searches ‘boobs’. Then ‘big boobs’, ‘small boobs’, ‘blowjobs’, ‘doggy style’. With each search term he types in, the screen loads with various videos of his request. And then, just for shits and giggles, he searches for his favorite - ‘lingerie’.
The results are everything he dreamed of. Forget Victoria’s Secret, this has it all. Women of different sizes and skin tones, all in various stages of undress. Some wearing bras and panties, others wearing lace babydolls and teddies. One particular thumbnail has his interest piqued, though. It’s a woman in a robe, leaning towards the camera so her cleavage is showing. “Let me strip tease you ;)” is the title of her video. 
CLICK HERE TO WATCH.
She doesn’t need to tell Joel twice. Joel clicks the link and watches a little popup on his screen indicate that a video is downloading. Once downloaded, he opens the file and begins to watch the video. The woman featured is cute, he thinks. She’s a curvy redhead and she’s teasing, smiling - he likes that. Those Victoria's Secret models don’t smile like this. She lifts her lacy pink robe and shows her ass where there’s a cute little heart-shaped peekaboo cutout in her panties. Joel likes that too. Joel’s been absentmindedly stroking himself and he sighs in contentment. She’s about to open her robe, show him her breasts and–
Windows System Alert
Error Code: 0x80070070
Your computer has encountered a critical issue due to a potentially harmful program. This issue has affected system files and may cause instability or loss of data.
Please take the following actions immediately:
Save all work in progress.
Disconnect from the internet.
Run a full system scan with your security software.
For further assistance, contact technical support.
“Well, that ain’t right,” Joel mumbles. Joel clicks on the little red X in the top right corner to make it disappear, but the popup is right back where it was, blocking that cute redhead from giving Joel a virtual show. He tries closing the message again, it pops right back up. Growing slightly irritated, Joel closes the media player altogether and reopens the downloaded strip tease video. It won’t open. “The fuck?” He tries opening an old untitled document from months ago, and yet again he’s met with the same error message. The popup is arriving in multiples now, blocking his screen. It’s like whack-a-mole, the way he’s closing one and two more pop up in its place.
Joel’s out of his depth here, so he decides to consult an expert. He lives right across the street from a total computer whiz, so he’ll ask her for help. He tucks himself back into his jeans with a soft groan, zips and buttons his jeans before making his way to her house. 
-
You’re vacuuming your floor when you think you hear the faint sound of knocking, so you turn around to see a figure standing on your porch through your window. It’s Joel. Devastatingly handsome, grumpy, single dad. 
You and Joel got off to a rocky start when you moved into the neighborhood a couple years back. He used to hound you about letting your grass grow too long, and you’d argue back by telling him that it’s good for the environment. Growing tired of your protesting, Joel decided to start mowing your lawn for you, without your consent. Not that you really minded, he always wears his grass-stained white and navy New Balance sneakers, his few-inches-too-short denim cutoffs and an old white tank top, stained with grease and his own sweat. It clings to his body, outlining his soft belly. His slightly graying but dark, damp curls cling to his perspiring forehead as his thick thighs clench with every step he takes, pushing that heavy lawnmower up and down your front yard. You compensate him with glasses of fresh squeezed lemonade, offer him a cool wash rag that he wipes his forehead with, the sweat and water dripping down his temple, over the stubble on his jaw. Tensions softened then, and Joel’s been a nice neighbor to have ever since. He, his brother and daughter are good people. 
You tap the button on the bottom of your vacuum cleaner with your toe, shutting it off before opening the door for Joel. He looks a little disheveled - he’s breathing heavily, pupils blown wide. “You busy right now?”
“For you? You know I’m always too busy,” you smirk, tapping your foot against his shoe. 
“Yeah, whatever. Listen, I’m findin’ myself in need of your computer expertise. Would you be able to help me, darlin’?”
It’s the way Joel calls you darlin’, how he flashes those sparkling, chocolate eyes at you, bats his long lashes and smiles at you in such a way that you’re sure he’s deliberately trying to send you to an early grave. You’re wrapped around Joel’s finger but nevertheless, you work your angle. “My time is precious, Joel. How will you make it worth my while?”
Joel rolls his eyes, “Oh, give me a break. I’ll mow your lawn. Does that work for you, princess?” 
“You already mow my lawn.” 
“Yeah, and I’ll keep mowin’ it. How’s that?” 
“Cheap,” you quip. But you still smile and close the door behind you, and Joel blushes as you unknowingly take the hand Joel was just pleasuring himself with in yours, swinging your arms between you playfully as you cross the street to his house together. Your skin tickles when Joel places a hand on your lower back, guiding you to his computer setup before pulling out the chair for you. You log into his computer using his own username and password, something you know by heart. Joel has forgotten his password so many times, he used to call you - at a minimum - twice a week to ask you what it was. The only solution to that issue was for you to write it down on a post-it note and stick it next to the monitor for him. He absolutely hates that you’ve made him put dollar signs and exclamation marks in his password. “Seems unnecessary,” is what he would say, annoyance lacing his tone. 
You retorted with, “Well if you can’t even get into your own computer, how could anyone else?” and Joel shrugged and nodded.
Joel pours both himself and you a glass of ice water, then sits down at the dining room table behind you. “So it’s uhh…” he starts, interrupting himself to sip his water. “Got this error message thing when you click on a file.”
Clicking a file, you see the error popup Joel’s referring to. “I see,” you mumble, clicking on a few others. Joel watches your brows furrow in concentration, a frown painting your lips. 
Oh, shit. Joel didn’t even think to delete that file. “W-what is it? Why’re you makin’ that face?”
“I’m diagnosing.”
Right. Of course you are. You haven’t seen anything you’re not supposed to see, because it’s not like the files would magically start opening for your eyes only. Right? “What’s the verdict, doc?” Joel jokes, hoping you don’t hear the way his voice wobbles slightly with anxiety. 
You suck in a breath through your teeth, “Not good,” you reply. “All of your files are corrupted, I thin–”
Joel interrupts, “What’s that, what’s corrupted? Is that bad?”
“Your turn,” you interrupt back, cocking an eyebrow at his impoliteness. It’s very unlike him.
“M’sorry, hon. Go ‘head, sorry.”
 Joel needs to get it together. He’s fidgety and high-strung. He needs to calm down. It’s fine. It will be fine. You’re gonna work your magic and you’re not gonna see anything you’re not supposed to see. When you’re done, you’re gonna go home and Joel will go right back to his private time as previously scheduled - that’s probably what his biggest problem is, he’s blue-balled himself and he’s all wound-up. Problem will be fixed, easy peasy.
 “When did you say this problem started again?”
“Uh, just a little bit ago,” Joel answers, walking over to the sink and getting himself a glass of water. “Thirsty?”
“No, thanks. What websites do you visit?”
Joel watches you browse his files and mess with the system preferences on his computer. “The weather mostly, or Amazon.. Orderin’ books for Sarah.” Which is a total lie, but he justifies this in his head by telling himself that you don’t need to know what website he visits the most. It’ll embarrass you both. And actually, Sarah prefers to go to the library. She even went today.
“Anything else?”
Joel lies again, “Check the news from time to time, check my team’s scores.” 
You hum in response and continue typing. Joel wishes he could type like that, watching your fingers effortlessly fly across the keyboard. He likes the sound it makes, the quiet clicking and the tapping of your manicured fingernails. “What about emails, you avoiding those scams I told you about?” 
“Yes.”
“Clicking on chainmail?” 
“I am not.”
“Not anymore,” you mumble under your breath. Joel rolls his eyes. You’ll never let it go, will you?
-
Chainmail is how you became Joel’s IT girl. For a couple of months, you’d received various emails from him that were just copy-paste chainmail messages. You know, the ones that say things like ‘Click here to verify your account information. Send to 10 friends and family members to verify their accounts as well.’ You’d just delete, delete, delete, and reply back asking him to stop emailing you these things. But Joel never stopped, day after day he’d send you chainmail. After receiving what felt like the eightieth spam email from [email protected], you decided to confront him. 
Joel awoke from an accidental afternoon nap to rather incessant knocking coming from his front door. He opened it only to find you on his porch, where you then proceeded to invite yourself inside. “What happened to hello?” he asked, his voice all sexy and raspy and his eyes tired, lines indenting his face from laying on the couch. He yawned, running his fingers through his curls to try and tame the bed head. You wondered if he always looked this handsome when he woke up.
“Sorry, hi,” you corrected. “Need to borrow your computer. Please.”
Yawning again, Joel sleepily gestured to his computer in the kitchen. “Knock yourself out. Damn thing ain’t actin’ right, though.”
You powered the machine on logged in using the post-it taped to his wall, rolling your eyes and shaking your head. Upon logging in and connecting to the internet, you noticed all sorts of glitches. Not even your computer ran consistently smoothly, but Joel’s was a wreck. Popups and error messages of all different kinds littered the screen, blocking the cute picture of himself and Sarah he had set as the background. “Wow, I couldn’t tell,” you teased. “You have more errors than you do applications on this thing, Joel.” Joel only shrugged in response. “Come sit by me,” you said.
Joel pulled up a seat next to you. “I wanna show you something. Can I open your email?”
“Go right ahead, hon.”
You opened Joel’s email and found his ‘sent’ box, where the last sent email was addressed to you. You clicked it and it opened to his last sent piece of chainmail. “I’ve asked you to stop sending me these emails,” you told him. 
Joel looked crushed almost, a look of puzzlement and what might’ve been hurt momentarily painting his features. “You have?”
“I have.”
The chainmail on the screen was a common one he’d send you, the one asking you to give up your information to protect yourself. “I was only tryin’ to be neighborly. I thought you’d like ‘em, y’know - want you to keep yourself safe.”
It was endearing, the way he explained himself. How he wanted you to stay safe. Your frustration dissipated, only to be renewed as you looked in his spam folder to find all of your replies to him in there instead of his main inbox. “Joel, why am I in your spam folder?” you asked, sighing. Joel simply shrugged and you didn’t even have words. By the look on his face, he probably didn’t even realize he had a spam folder, much less knew what one was. But you had greater concerns. “What are those emails supposed to keep me safe from?”
 “Well, from…” Joel’s mouth hung open as he thought about it, looked up and to the side as he began to realize he didn’t have an answer. “Uhh–”
“You don’t know, do you?” Joel shook his head. “Exactly. It’s called phishing, these emails you’ve been sending me aren’t real. They’re trying to get peoples’ personal information, like, look–” you pointed to the screen, showing Joel an example, “See? Here, it’s asking for your bank information.”
“And I wasn’t ‘sposed to give them that?”
You tilted your head in disappointment, “Joel.” 
Joel groaned and leaned back in his chair, pressing the heels of his palms into his eyes. “Yeah, I know. Fuckin’ idiot.”
You were about to tell him to call his bank, but he was already on it. He pulled his Nokia phone from his belt clip and called his bank to explain the situation. As you went through his inbox and deleted each and every one of the hinky-looking emails, you listened to Joel on the phone. 
“Didn’t realize there were these uh…email scams…Yeah, that charge was me. And that too…
 …Will you call me f’ya see anything suspicious? Okay.
 …Okay. Thank you, ma’am. Thank you. You too.”
From what you heard of the phone call, it seemed that he was safe. You guessed that Joel’s technological ineptitude is probably what had saved him, that he likely mistyped or misunderstood what the scam was attempting to do. You continued to delete scams and other malware-adjacent things from his computer as Joel hung up the phone call and sat back down with you. “Everything okay?”
“Yeah, s’all good.”
Joel looked shaken, though. You touched his hand sympathetically and gave it a gentle squeeze. “You’re gonna learn some internet safety today.”
“Figured. I need it.” 
“Yeah, you do,” you smiled. You went through his email, pointing out all the different scams. You told him not to click on links that look like this and that. This is a scam, this is too. You told him that anything attempting to sell fireworks, guns, or anything else at the low, low price of x amount isn’t real. And no, these emails here do not mean that you won a new TV or the lottery or a cruise. Anything that seems too good to be true definitely is. “...Actually,” you began, “All of these are from Tommy. New rule, don’t click on anything from Tommy.”
“Noted,” Joel replied. “I didn’t know any ‘a this.”
“Most people don’t. It’s new, yet. But you know now, so it’s okay.”
Joel breathed a sigh of relief, but he still looked overwhelmed. This time he took your hand and squeezed it. After a moment, he asked you where you learned all of this from. You explained you picked a lot of it up in school, just learning things here and there. Joel let you talk about it all and seemed genuinely interested and impressed.  
“I went through and fixed all that was giving you trouble, by the way. Your computer should be running smoother,” you said. “And I changed your password.  ‘abcde’ is not a good password, Joel.” 
From that day forward, you became Joel's official computer girl. He’d call you and have you help him when he couldn’t get his computer connected to the printer, when he screwed with the settings and the computer didn’t look or act the way he was used to. Even the most basic things, like whenever he had a new picture of himself and Sarah he wanted to change the background to. Not that you minded, you’d jump at any opportunity to poke fun at your handsome neighbor’s lack of computer knowledge.
-
“Did you click on any links from Tommy?”
Joel goes quiet at that, remembering your very specific rule to not engage with him over email. He looks down at his hands as he twiddles his thumbs together. “I might’ve…one or two, maybe”
“What kind of links?”
“There– Fuck, I don’t know. You know, just…websites. They take me to websites. But I don’t give ‘em my information,” he insists. 
“What’s on these websites?”
Joel thinks fast. “Truckparts,” he answers too quickly, and the two words come out as one. “Just truck parts,” he says again, slower.
“Well, you must’ve been looking at some sketchy truck parts. You’ve got a virus.” 
“Okay,” he says. “Figured as much. But you’ve fixed those before for me, haven’t you?”
“I have, but this one means business,” you reply, shaking your head. You start to type a bit, click the mouse as you go through and attempt to delete corrupted files, but it’s not working the way it should. You open Netscape and check the browsing history to see if that can clue you in as to what website could have done this to Joel’s computer. “You said it just started?”
“Just started, yeah,” Joel affirms.
Which…tracks. 
Today, Saturday, June 25, 2003
5:06 pm https://xxxmyvideos.com/lingerie
4:54 pm https://xxxmyvideos.com/doggy-style
4:50 pm https://xxxmyvideos.com/blowjobs
4:49 pm https://xxxmyvideos.com/small-boobs
4:49 pm https://xxxmyvideos.com/big-boobs
4:45 pm https://xxxmyvideos.com/home
His search history is nothing but porn, which you’re 99% sure is exactly what caused the virus. The time stamps all show that the site was visited within the last hour, and Joel says it just started, so… 
“What’re you lookin’ at?”
“Well,” you say, hesitating before answering fully. “I am looking at your search history.”
Joel stares at the monitor like a deer in the headlights. “There’s - my uh…” he swallows thickly, “They keep records of that?”
“Mhm.”
“Well I told you - just….lookin’ at parts,” Joel’s hand wobbles slightly as he sips on his water.
“Yeah, lady parts.”
Joel sputters on his drink, choking and coughing as he slams the glass down and water spills everywhere. He uses the bottom of his t-shirt to clean his mess as he begins to turn red, feeling his chest and neck and cheeks begin to warm. He can’t even look at you, but he hears your giggles and he can picture your smug grin and he wishes so badly he was dead right now. You’ve seen it all, you know everything. You know it and so does he. He’s gaining the courage to look at you and oh god - you’re scrolling through the dirty website. Giggling, you’re looking at everything he looked at, fucking everything. You’re seeing the same dicks he saw, the same pussies, seeing the purple links that indicate exactly what he’s already clicked on. “Yeah, laugh it up,” he says angrily, defensively. “Ain’t that funny.”
Joel’s world is ending, but it’s really not as bad as he thinks it is. The porn is tamer than what’s often found on the internet, much tamer than the shit you watch. You continue to explore the site as you listen to Joel tell on himself behind you.
“It’s just somethin’ to pass the time,” he says. “It’s natural, alright? And I know you do it too.” He’s deflecting. Even still, he’s not wrong, you certainly do take part. 
You just let him keep talking, relishing in having the upper hand in this situation. “You’re blushing,” you tell him when he quiets down, just to get him started and riled up again as you browse the site. You notice a lot of videos are duplicates, prompting users to download the same thumbnail uploaded by different usernames. Whatever Joel clicked on was probably not uploaded by a real person, though. He clocked on a gibberish username made up of random letters and numbers, unlike some other videos uploaded under actual names. Like Joel’s new found friend ‘cherry_girl_xo’, whose username link is purple. You smirk at that, turning around to look at Joel who definitely recognizes her. He’s bright red everywhere.  
You’re sure this website is the culprit, but you check the rest of his search history to see if any other clue lies in there, but see nothing of import. All you notice are various links to victoriassecret.com, over and over and over again. Based on that and his last searched term on that shady porn site, you can safely assume he’s got a thing for lingerie. Which - funnily enough, you’re wearing right now. Not the kind of lingerie Joel’s been beating off to, but similar. You’re wearing your laciest undergarments, a lavender colored bra with a matching thong. They’re your laundry day underwear, you know the kind - five years old and been sitting at the bottom of your underwear drawer untouched for four of those years, not very comfortable and only to be worn when you’ve just gotten off your period and all of your cotton bikinis and boyshorts are in the wash. That kind. 
After toying with Joel’s computer for a while longer while he twists uncomfortably in agonizing humiliation, you decide there’s not much else that can be done. “I think we have to wipe it all, Joel,” you tell him. “Delete everything and start fresh.”
Joel nods quietly. “Will I still be able to play pinball after?”
“Yeah, I’ll make sure you can play pinball,” you chuckle.
“Wipe it, then.”
And so you start the process, which will take a long while. The screen loads and loads as you and Joel wait quietly. You look at Joel, who’s got an elbow on the table as he rests his forehead in his palm. “What?” he snaps, noticing you staring at him. You can’t fight the giggles from erupting. “Would you quit fuckin’ gigglin’ like that? You know that a man’s got needs and I ain’t hurtin’ anyone–” You contort your lips into a forced frown, pressing them into a thin line and then covering your mouth to keep your laughter at bay, but you’re struggling. Joel can see the amusement still sparkling in your eyes and says your name in a warning tone. 
“I’m sorry,” you smile, raising your hands in surrender. “I won’t laugh. I’m sorry, Joel.”
“Better be,” he grumbles. He drinks the last of his water quietly as you think about something, something that’s been heavy on your mind for the last couple of minutes. What if Joel knew what you were wearing beneath your clothes? You’ve made this afternoon absolute hell for him and you know that - but you don’t care. You’ve had too much fun getting under his skin to stop now. 
The real dirty work begins when you unzip your sweatshirt and hang it over the back of your chair. When Joel looks at you, you bring your hand to your shoulder and gently pull up on your bra strap, letting it snap your shoulder.
Joel shifts in his seat and clears his throat, “You warm or somethin’?”
“Yeah, it’s a little hot in here.”
“Mm,” Joel spins his now empty glass between his thumb and pointer finger. When he looks back at you, he flips the glass. You’ve pulled the top of your tank top down, your lacy bra and cleavage on full display. He tries to make two moves at once, catch the rolling glass and cover his crotch because he’s just gone erect.  “Cute. I would appreciate it if you’d knock that off now, I get the picture. S’real funny,” he mutters as he scrambles.
“What picture?” you ask innocently. 
“Oh, don’t you start. You know exactly what damn picture,” Joel snaps. “You figured it out. Got a certain fondness for ladies in lace. You feel clever or somethin’?” 
You really can’t bite back your smile this time, “Mhm.”
“You shouldn’t. You’re exploitin’ my vulnerabilities, takin’ cheap shots and–” Joel’s jaw drops as he watches you unbutton your jean shorts and show off your panties, the little bow at the center of them nicely on display. His look of shock quickly turns into a glare as you take off your tank top. “Like that, that’s playin’ dirty. Put your shirt back on and zip yourself back up. What the hell’s gotten into you?”
“I dunno,” you shrug. You really don’t. This is just as surprising to you as it is to Joel, but the look on his face tells you that you’re definitely having way more fun than he is. 
“God, you’re killin’ me,” he groans. The way you’re so cavalier about this all has Joel both flummoxed and irate. 
But you’re not this bold usually, not really. Joel must not have noticed the way your hands have been trembling, must not have heard your slightly shaky breaths. He’s been avoiding eye contact too much to notice you’ve been doing the same. “Why?”
“Why? Cause I’m only a man and you’re gettin’ me all worked up. You’re takin’ advantage of me and my biology,” Joel gestures angrily to his crotch. He’s not even bothering to hide it anymore - you’ve seen it all and know what you’ve done to him. “You proud?”
“You’re–”
“Yeah, I’m fuckin’ hard - been hard. Didn’t get to take care of myself ‘cause of the fuckin’ virus and here you are teasin’ and temptin’ me and…Hon, what’re you -” Joel’s angered expression turns to momentary confusion when you stand up, then turns to contentment when you straddle his lap. You press your core into his thick bulge, holding onto his shoulders for stability. “What are you doin’?” he sighs, his head falling backward.
“I’m sorry,” you whisper. “For teasing.”
“Yeah, so you say, princess.”
You grind yourself on his lap and when Joel brings his head forward to search for your eyes, he notices how your eyes flicker away from his. Like maybe you’re not as in control of this situation as you appear to be. 
“I am.”
“Mm,” Joel hums. You’re reaching between your bodies and fumbling with the button on his jeans. He sucks in his soft belly to unbutton them for you, wraps his strong hand around your wrist and brings your hand to his mouth. “Gimme this,” he mumbles, spitting into your hand before he shoves it under the waistband of his boxers. A pang of arousal floods your gut at the action.
You palm his warm, heavy cock, feeling him thicken in your hand, though he’s already so hard. You can feel his rigid member throb and ache as you work his shaft up and down, up and down, your knuckles brushing against his thatch of coarse curls and his tummy. It’s evident how much he’s needed this, what with the way his chest rises and falls with his heavy breaths, soft groans escaping his lips as he does so. 
Joel enjoys himself as you work him. “Fuck,” he whispers. You look down between your bodies to admire his member, the blushed, leaking tip and the thick and prominent veins. And he’s so smooth, his skin almost silky. You watch his blissed out face, contemplate kissing those pink, pouting lips of his. You’re gonna do it, bringing your face close to his. Brushing your lips ever so softly over his, Joel moves to kiss you fully when you pull back. His computer makes that signature Windows startup sound,
“I have to take care of that,” you murmur. You dismount Joel and he picks up where you leave off, stroking his own cock just like you were. He watches your nearly naked body with hooded eyes that flutter shut as you work, typing quietly on his keyboard. You set his username and password the same, make sure that things open as they should. For Joel’s own protection, you block [email protected]
“Finished?” Joel asks as you stand up from your seat in front of his computer. 
“Mhm,” you reply, gripping his shoulder with your hand as you bend over halfway to pick up your discarded top and kiss his cheek. “Have fun with your Victoria’s Secret girls, Joel.”
Your work here is done. You’ve fixed Joel’s computer and by the look on his face, broken his heart. “What are you doing?”
You smile, too proud of yourself as you begin to walk away. Before you can walk further, Joel stands up and reaches across the table, grabbing you by the forearm and forcing you onto your back. “You ain’t gettin’ away from me that easy, princess,” he says. “I still got somethin’ that needs fixed.” Joel displays strength but is as gentle as can be, though the cold, hard wood against your spine and your shoulder blades hurt you for a moment. Your eyes widen in shock, but it’s a welcome pain. “Knew you weren’t fuckin’ sorry,” Joel spits. Your head dangles off the edge of the table and Joel uses a hand to open your mouth, forcing two of his thick fingers inside. Instinctually, you curl your tongue around the digits, sucking and licking. You can taste his cock on his fingers from when he was pleasuring himself just moments ago.
Joel pumps himself in his hand for a second before guiding his thick head to your lips, pushing past them in one quick thrust, right to the back of your throat so you gag. He likes that noise. “I give you an inch,” he grunts, “And you take a mile.” You slide your tongue over those thick veins of his you’d previously traced with your fingertips. Joel draws out of your mouth slowly, allowing you to lick his weeping slit before pushing himself back in. “It would’ve been courteous of you to keep my dirty secret to yourself, but you couldn’t even do that. Went an’ humiliated me instead, then you got the nerve to try ‘n leave me high and dry? I don’t think I deserve that.”
  Joel wants to fuck your mouth until your lips are raw and swollen, show you just what he thinks of your stunt. But he demonstrates self control, allows you to take him at your own pace and yet, you continue to tease. It’s like it’s innate or something, the way you continue to only give little by little, savoring the saltiness of his precome. He gives you one last warning, “You really should learn when to quit while you’re ahead, hon.”
You persist anyway. Wrong move. Joel fucks himself into your mouth with no regard for your comfort, taking what he needs from you. It’s sloppy and messy, his heavy balls bouncing off the tip of your nose. You wish you could see him, see the way he’d glare at you. He’s flipped like a switch, previously holding himself back from having his way with you like he wanted to. He’s taking it now. All the softness in him is gone, and you fucking love it. You reach forward, sliding your hand down your stomach, dipping it beneath your panties. You spread your legs wide and your fingers hover over your pussy, feeling that wet heat radiating from your core. Just as you let your fingers drop to touch your aching clit, you feel Joel lunge forward and pull your hand away. “Nuh-uh, not where I eat. Where are your manners, princess?” 
He fucks your mouth relentlessly, holding the sides of your head in his big hands. He watches the way your lace-covered tits bounce with his every thrust. He pushes himself deeper and deeper, ignoring your sputtering and choking on his cock. Your eyes prick with tears as your jaw begins to ache, really fucking ache. Joel doesn’t stop himself, and it’s not like he would if he knew you were crying like this. He fills the air with his own grunting and groaning, relishing in the warmth of your wet, soft mouth.
And then he’s done. No slowing to a standstill, just abruptly pulls out. You hear his heavy footsteps as he rounds the kitchen table, hooks his fingertips beneath the waistband of your shorts and pulls them down, pulls your hips close to his so your face is no longer dangling off the edge. He pulls your panties to the side, drags his thumb up and down your slick folds and it’s like the quiet before the storm. 
He notches himself in your entrance and pushes himself in, inch by inch by inch. Slowly, deliberately, so that you feel all of the stretching and aching he wants you to. “Joel,” you cry. “Fuck, Joel, please, I can’t–”
“You’ll get used to it,” he purrs. He leans over you as he fucks you slowly, holding your neck with his thumb on your jawbone while he kisses you to quiet you down, licking into your mouth and swirling his tongue around with yours. You whimper softly into his mouth with his every thrust, the pain not yet completely dissipated, but pleasurable in its own way. “Spread your legs. Wider.”
You open yourself up for him, allowing him to fuck himself deeper into you. You accept it all as he wraps your legs around his waist, your heels bouncing on his ass. The head of his cock kisses that sweet spot inside of you, pleasure beginning to take over your senses and you moan. “Fuck, Joel.”
“Feels good, don’t it? Maybe this whole virus fiasco was a blessing in disguise, darlin’,” Joel says, “Feels good f’me too.”
You cry out loudly when he puts your legs up on his shoulders, the new angle has him inside you even deeper than before. He sits you up a bit, putting your arms behind your back and pressing your palms down flat on the table with his own. 
He draws out of you and fills you up again, over and over and over. “Fuck, look at us,” he kisses your ankle a couple of times, “Look,” Joel looks down where your bodies meet and you join him, watching how his cock slides in and out of you, all wet and coated in your slick. Panties still pulled to the side, your skin is irritated where the fabric tugs and scratches at your skin. He maintains a quick rhythm, rolling his hips into yours. 
“Make me come, Joel, I want to come.”
“Oh, I’ve got no doubt you do. But maybe I’ll leave you high and dry like you were gonna do to me, see how you like it. What a waste that’d be, huh?” You whine at the threat and Joel smiles deviously, he likes having you at his mercy like this. All pathetic and begging for him to let you come undone. “You’re nothin’ but talk, aren’t you?”
“Make me come, please.”
“You’ll have to convince me,” he says. “You heard me, convince me. Better make it quick.”
Your brain is short-circuiting, you can’t even process what Joel said and begin to make your case. You feel him twitching, his hips stuttering and before you know it, he’s spilling into you. He paints your insides with his hot spend, milking himself entirely in your cunt and your disappointment is incalculable. Tears of frustration well up and threaten to spill down your cheeks. It was all fun and games before, but you suddenly feel so used and betrayed. You can’t say he didn’t warn you. 
“Ohh, I know,” he coos, wiping your eyes. “Bit off more than you could chew, didn’t you?”
You nod, sniffling quietly. 
“You can still convince me. I’m all ears, ya know.”
“How?”
“Well,” Joel says. He’s beginning to soften inside of you, and so he pulls out with a soft ‘fuck’, his spend spilling out of you and onto his table. “Can start with an ‘I’m sorry, Joel’. And I want a real one this time.”
“I’m sorry, Joel.”
“S’a good start. Wanna give me some more? Tell me why?”
“F-for teasing you and stuff.”
“For teasing me and stuff,” he repeats your words slowly. Joel pulls off his t-shirt and folds it tightly, places it at the end of the table and lowers your head onto it. “You’re lucky you’re pretty.”
Joel kneels before you and wraps his arms around your thighs. He presses a kiss over your cloth-covered core, feeling the dampness of your arousal and his spend on his lips. He spreads your legs wide, exposing your wet cunt for him, lips all swollen and ribbons of his spend clinging to your folds. He admires the thick curls framing your pussy, “I gotcha,” he whispers. “C’mere.”
You gasp when Joel finally, finally begins to explore you, his tongue parting open your folds. He pulls back and pushes one, then two fingers inside you, humming in satisfaction at the way you suck him in, so eager and needy for his touch. He curls his fingers inside of you slowly, watching how you react to his touch. You twitch and jerk as you try to keep yourself still. 
“Oh, Joel,” you moan as he laps at your cunt, feeling that warm, sticky feeling flow through your hips. His mouth and fingers work together to bring you closer to your edge, humming as he rhythmically strokes that sweet spot inside of you. His tongue is so hot, wet, and firm as he drags it up and down your sex, circling your clit with the muscle. “Mmm, fuck. Oh, god.”
Joel doesn’t know what’s more satisfying, the sweet taste of this most private place between your thighs or the sounds of your pleasure as he eats you. He devours you voraciously, sucking one fold and nipping at the other as he curls his fingers, never faltering in their movements. With his free hand that’s not teasing your pussy, he reaches around and pulls the hood of your clit back to suck and lick the sensitive bud. His dark, slightly graying and wiry stubble drags across the skin of your inner thighs, scratching you gently. It’s building up quickly, that familiar feeling deep in your spine.
“I’m–” a moan rips through your chest and interrupts you, “Fuck, I’m–”
“I know, hon,” he whispers, escalating his efforts. He sucks, licks, and curls his fingers harder, feeling the slow build of you beginning to come apart for him. You come on his lips and spill into his hand as Joel works you through your orgasm. You’re a gushing, moaning mess, your hands fly to his scalp and you tug on his soft curls when he licks a stripe up the seam of your cunt. And then another, slower. Another yet, even slower. 
You expect him to pull away from your center with a satisfied grin, his mustache and beard dampened by your slick. But he stays put, licking more long stripes up and down your pussy. Your thighs twitch and flutter uncontrollably and Joel holds you apart for him as he continues to tease, circling the tip of his perfect, aquiline nose around your clit. 
“Too much, it’s too much,” you cry. 
“Mhm. But you got one more in you, I know you do.”
“Joel–” 
You think you might break. You’re not sure where you feel Joel’s tongue, you just feel him fucking everywhere. You don’t know where your orgasm begins and ends, just that by the time Joel decides you’re done, you’re in sweet agony and he luxuriates in the taste of your second release. He’s made such a pretty mess of you. He presses one last kiss to your core, “Yeah, that was a good one, wasn’t it?”
Joel pulls away from your center, wiping his lips on your thighs. His cheeks are flushed and his dark eyes sparkle. He lets you catch your breath as he fills a glass of water for you and brings it to your lips helping you to drink as your hands are still trembling from it all. 
When the moment passes, you gather your clothes. You pull on your tank top and put your shorts back on. “Oh,” you say. 
“Hm?”
“I blocked Tommy’s email, just so you know. He’s trouble.”
Joel chuckles. “You, my darlin’, are trouble. But that’s probably for the best, thank you for fixin’ my computer again.” 
“It’s no problem,” you reply. 
“Oh–” Joel grabs something from his stack of mail on his countertop and hands it to you. It’s some Victoria’s Secret coupons.“This was addressed to you. Ended up in my mail. Fuckin’ mail guy.”
You giggle quietly, what a curmudgeon he is. “Actually, I think you need it more than I do. You can beat off to your angels in analog,” you tease.
Joel rolls his eyes. “You just don’t learn, do you?” he says, taking the coupons back from you. “And actually, think I will hang on to this. Maybe I’ll even buy you somethin’ pretty an’ we can do this again soon.”
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Worldbuilding H/C: Soulmates
So this will be just be the general head-canons about how the different cultures in HSR would be structures in a soulmate AU (alias how soulmates influenced laws and cultures), and how the playable characters view them. I will later add a image for each character. When we are induced to new cultures in the game i might add a part 2 to this.
Soulmates are general confirmed and accepted, nobody is really denying that they exist. But depending on who your soulmate is you might find stark differences in how they will view you and what is expected of you. For given that soulmates are confirmed for centuries, this knowledge shaped societies -some in culture, some even in law. Each planet has they own way of doing this.
Overall it is believed that the soulmate marks where blessing send out by the Aeons, a gift that all of them send out in junction. These soulmates have three parts; The first is Sign -a physical mark on the body -each match have a tattoo that both of them have since birth, absolute matching one-another in shape and placement. Second is Recognition -there is a instinctive bond between soulmates to protect and trust. Not enough to control once actions, but enough to sway the undecided. Hereby it doesn't matter if they even know their soulmate is involved -if for example a ship is in danger, and a soulmate has a match on that ship without knowing or any indications, the soulmate will lean towards protecting the ship. The last is different for each race; Protection will give what a match needs to stay together. If one soulmate ages slower than the other, their match will age normally till they reach the physical age of their soulmate, then have their aging slow down to the same space. If a soulmates race has a special ability like breathing under water or immunity to fire, then that will carry over.
In Belebog soulmates rarely found each other, what with the Eternal Freeze and later even with the ban between Under- and Overworld. Therefore people will be pretty open to marry somebody who is not their soulmate. That is if you haven't meet or have already lost their soulmate. If someone were to pursue someone else while their match is right next to them it would still turn some confused heads. But it isn't unheard of. Still, finding your match is considered special. The Landau Siblings, Gepard and Serval are a bit out the norm, wanting to wait for their soulmates. They haven't mentioned it to their parents, neither wanting to deal with the backlash and pressure to continue the family line -in fact they haven't even told each other. As for Bronya a romantic partner had not even been on the table till her soulmate shows up. From there on she feels lost, she doesn't want to let go of this possibility, but she also have no idea what to do with a soulmate. Others who would be blindsided by a match showing up where Natasha and Seele. Nat doesn't think she deserves a soulmate, her match has to convince her to give them a chance. Seele meanwhile had regarded finding a match as a fairy tale scenario, highly unlikely -even if she claimed to wait for them to stop her admirers. It was only a line, you know. Sampo is open-minded to finding a soulmate, but isn't searching or waiting. Pela used to believe she would find her soulmate and was ready to fight for that. Then she was sent to the frontlines of the Eternal Freeze and decided to give up and focus on reality.
(Characters: Gepard Serval Bronya Natasha Seele Sampo)
People of the Xianzhou Alliance are the complete opposite. They believe that matches are scared and married from birth. It is not only outlawed, but unthinkable to be with anyone outside the Bond. Soulmates are often refers to as Kindreds. Found matches will usually move together that very same day. Exceptions are made for kids, in which case they will have constantly alternating sleepovers. Xianzhou and Foxians share they longevity with they matches, while Vidyadhara share they reincarnation-cycle ability. One would think that make it easier to find their match, and really each ship has they citizens register their Signs and there is open communications to help everyone find their spouse. But there is also a danger in that; matches are thought to be one of mind. Which means if a crime is committed, both soulmates receive the sentence. So if your aging acts up be careful, you don't know what your soulmate was up to. 'You didn't know' will not hold in front of their laws. However if you are the soulmate of Jing Yuan, Fu Xuan or Yukong, it's up to school with you. As their Kindred you are considered their second in command and must learn their people's law and train in combat. Yanqing's soulmate will face similar, but as he is still in training himself, it will be more relaxed. Each of them will of course be with you every step of the way. Sushang is currently searching for you. Tingyun is content to wait for you, she collets trinkets over the years to gift you when you finally meet. Qingque has only just returned from a Search so she is currently focusing on her own life, but she has diaries about her searches she plans to gift her soulmate. Loucha is more a nomad, so he doesn't consider you his spouse yet and fully plans to woe you off your feet, but he has high regard for the soulmate traditions of the Xianzhou and might be quickly influenced by them. Just keep in mind to set boundaries early with any of them, they respect you to much to overstep even if those boundaries are things they are unfamiliar with.
(Characters: Jing Yuan Fu Xuan Yukong Yanqing Sushang Tingyun Qingque Loucha)
Space-Nomads have an interesting case where either each member of the group stays true to their home world's culture or a group has developed their own soulmate culture while traveling together. Other space nomads go with a mix of the two. But overall they experienced enough other cultures that they will have no problem adjusting to their soulmate's culture.
The Nameless mostly go by their home-world's culture, mainly since the culture that Pom-Pom says used to exist on the Express died before Himeko rediscovered said train. Still there are things they picked up from the conductor. Like calling Soulmates 'Soulcompasses' or just one's 'Compass'. Also, Pom-Pom considers each Nameless' match another guest of the Express and will cry if they don't board and travel with them. March 7 pretty much adopted his approach since she has no homeworld-culture to fall back on; in her mind a couple could take as long as they wanted to get together, as long both trailblazed together. Himeko is close to this ideal as well, but she wouldn't pressure someone into coming along. She can always visit with stories and souvenirs in tow. Her homeworld-culture teaches that no relationship is to be taken for granted, you don't own your soulmate, and sometimes they don't work out and that is okay. Welt is undecided on the tropic of soulmates, he has seen a lot. A soulmate is kind of unreal, but he won't push you away. The people of his world believe soulmates always work, but sometimes they don't work out right away. People are shaped by experiences. This means that at times matches can know each other for before they klick or even like each other. That being said he would never let anything happen to you if he could prevent it. Dan Heng has no problem connecting his heritage with the Express traditions, but from his experience traveling different worlds decides to give his 'Kindred Compass' the control on how fast the relationship goes. That said he is desperately hunting for his soulmate. Who knows what happen if they go to Loufu searching for him? He has to find them to at least warn them. The Trailblazer meanwhile, having no culture to remember, just adopts everybody's culture. Soulmates confuse them, but finding one's compass is good, yes?
(Characters Himeko Welt Yang March 7 Dan Heng Stelle Caelus)
Then you have the Stellaron Hunters. These guys are okay to play around or even marry prior to meeting their soulmate. But once they do, whatever relationship they had prior is over. No buts. Given how much they deal with the 'script', they will know when they will meet you and be ready a day or two early. They call the day of the meeting Destiny Call. Kafka confused everyone by bringing flowers to a fight the day she was to meet you. Silver Wolf thinks that is coming on too strong, but still makes sure to look her best on her Destiny Call. In contrast Blade will try to get a rise out of his soulmate the first time you meet. In his mind, his Fated One should know what they are getting into. They do take their other half a tad for granted, but that doesn't mean their aren't prepared to woe you for years to come.
(Characters: Kafka Silver Wolf Blade)
Now the crew of Herta's Space-Station all exclusively go by their home-world traditions. Except Herta herself. Herta has a pop-quiz ready that she will jump at you the moment she knows that you are her soulmate and make a plan based on your answers. Asta's world is neutral towards soulmates, but you only ever gift pearls or chocolate to a soulmate. So a relationship with her would be pretty normal. Except she won't stand for anyone giving you chocolate or you giving cholate out, not even to kids. Arlan has a plan on how to woe his soulmate -it goes flying out of the window the second he meets you. At his home planet you place your soulmate first before everything. There are laws against hurting one's soulmate, so he takes this very serious. Also, unlike some planets, Signs are thought as intimate, usually covered up. So if his soulmate were to show them off, he would be a blushing mess.
(Characters: Herta Asta Arlan)
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ash-says · 1 month
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Hush Hush Honey:
A guide on how to regulate oversharing and balancing the conversation flow.
Each one of us has at least been in a situation where we accidentally ended up spilling more than we should. We do recognise the patterns but are unable to control ourselves. That's why your girl Ash-says is here to say a lot about it.
1) Find the why
What are you trying to achieve by sharing that piece of information? Drama? Attention? Get it off your chest? Is it important to inform them? Is it valuable to them?etc.
First tackle the why. Before you go in to reveal something ask yourself if it goes with the conversation flow and if yes is it really important to share it.
2) Are you a celebrity?
No like why? Who is interested in your life so much? Are those people paparazzi to broadcast your current events and bring you fame? No right. So shut up.
3) Who puts their dirty laundry on display?
When you overshare you are basically putting all your secrets, stuff that you do or did on blatant exposure. People are going to judge you. That's the very nature. So breathe and keep it inside.
4) Try to listen more
Train yourself into listening more than speaking especially in group settings or around people that you don't know much about. Gossip is real. You don't want to be the next tea time sensation.
5) Alternatives for talkative people:
Now I know you might be thinking can't say this can't say that then how the hell am I going to bond with people or what should I converse about?
I have developed a solution for you. It's Ash verified because I myself have been using it unknowingly for around 7 years of my life.
Never open your mouth for passing judgements, expressing your opinions on things that do not relate to you, your dirty laundry, secrets, family issues, relationship issues, your sex life, your goals and aspirations, your daily routine, your political standpoint,etc you get where I am going right?
Instead speak about the experiences you had while travelling somewhere, some goofy stuff that happened to you, your harmless vice for example: I am clumsy so I have a lot of incidents that occur due to it which can be told in a funny way. It adds a nuance to my perfectionist image plus helps people warm up to me. Movie shows, songs, etc here also there's a catch if you relate to a show/song/ piece of literature strongly never reveal it. The smart ones will understand the inner workings of your mind.
Never let them know your next move.
If nothing of this then goof around being nonsense. Do little hand gestures, funny faces if you are bored but never overshare.
6) Be mindful of interruption
Practise practise practise. Literally that's the only way. Try not to interrupt people while speaking. There's no roundabout way. It is what it is.
7) Be comfortable in silence
You have to be okay with the conversation dying down. Running your mouth dry will only result in one sided convo. It's more useless and harmful than the one mentioned before.
8) Know your limits
Fix in your brain what you can share and what you can't. Stick to it. Even over your dead body.
9) Be genuinely interested in people
Ask yourself are you asking questions to really get to know the other person or just looking for a chance to talk about yourself? Dethrone yourself first and then interact with others.
10) Put out stuff that you are over with
Always remember what you say can and will be used against you. Drill it and from next time when you speak be mindful that every word can stand against you. Do you have the capacity to handle the consequences? Yes then go ahead. No, then stop live streaming.
Bonus point: Be as private as possible on social media. People don't need to know what you are doing nowadays. Privacy is power. What they don't know they can't ruin.
Strategically put things out. I am not saying be inactive. In Rome you live like the Romans. Do it smartly.
That's all for today's show on ash-says. Stay tuned for more illegal tricks and explosive opinions.
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maskrosfe · 1 year
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🎶Hello Folks🎶
I've been having a tricky time with burnout and work this year, so I'll be opening commissions to help me carve out more space for recovery while also helping feed my household 🙏
If you don't want to commission me but want to help out, a reblog goes a long way! thank you dearly 😊🌼
These images feature examples of my art and my prices, but if you wish for me to recreate a specific piece or style of mine, let me know and we can work out the price :-) All my commission information can also be found always over at this page.
How to Commission me:
1. Contact me on [email protected] and let me know what you're interested in. After I confirm the order I'll give the go-ahead that you can pay.
2. Pay me on Ko-fi (I'll send you a link) (we can also work on other payment methods if you have one you prefer)
3. After payment I will begin work. I will send you up to 2 extra drafts / sketches if needed, so that we can make sure I work in the direction you want.
4. When I'm done with the piece I'll send a digital HD copy of it your way! Alternatively if you've commissioned something traditional I can post it :-) Don't hesitate to contact me should any questions arise, I'll do my best to answer them swiftly 🌼!
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hugmekenobi · 14 days
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S3: The Bad Batch (6)
Chapter Six: Infiltration
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Gif by @timetodiverge
Hunter x femaleJedi!reader
Series Summary: Ever since Eriadu, Clone Force 99 had been a fractured squad. Months have passed but you're finally back with the Batch but Omega is still out there and you won't stop until you find her again.
Chapter Summary: A reunion with Rex unveils some more intel
Masterlist for S1 and S2
<Previous Chapter
Genre: Friends (idiots) to Lovers (we're in the lovers stage now)
Chapter Warnings: Canon-typical violence, light spice (making out, dirty talk, teasing touches, praise, nickname 'sweetheart'), I make up Fireball lore, brief call back to Order 66, general threatening atmosphere, I also dance around the M-count stuff (please be nice and just accept it lol), suggestions of misuse of the Force for interrogation purposes, brief mention of food and referenced character deaths
Word Count: 4.3K
Author's notes: Don't get excited about CX-2 because I still haven't thought about a way around his fate in S3 finale and my current plan is probably going to be very boring lol. Also Ch7 is out too!
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The meeting between Senator Chuchi and Senator Singh had started promising until a rather crude assassination attempt disrupted matters.
Unfortunately, Greer had fallen victim to the black armoured assassin– the grim silver lining being that he was the only casualty and they’d managed to capture the shadow clone sent after the senators.
--
As the ship flew through hyperspace, Rex and Howzer stared at the unconscious assassin- both of them wondering how such a change was possible. There was a distinct different to the clones that had remained loyal to the Empire and these shadow clones.
“Think he’ll cooperate?” Howzer asked apprehensively.
“I wouldn’t count on it, but we have to try.” Rex replied.
“We recovered this from his gear.” Howzer pulled out the puck. “It’s a data puck. Highly encrypted.”
“Have Fireball find out what’s on it when we get back to base camp.”
--
Teth
Rex stepped into the interrogation room to join the two other clones already in there and he saw that the clone assassin still unconscious. “Did you extract the device?”
Howzer handed it to him, “The electro capsule was implanted in one of his teeth. Just like you said. His identifying number’s been wiped too.” Howzer stared on the clone, “What exactly did the Empire do to him?”
No sooner had Howzer finished his sentence, did the clone open his eyes.
Rex knelt in front of him, “What’s your name, trooper?” He was met with stony silence, so he tried a different approach. “Listen, no matter what they did to you, no matter what you’ve done, you’re still a clone. Still one of us. I can help you, but we need answers.” Again, he was met with no reply, and he got the sinking feeling that whatever the Empire had done to him couldn’t be easily undone.
--
Tantiss
Scorch entered the communications office to stand in front of the holographic image of CX-2.
“Why have I been activated?” Came the modulated voice that had an air of contempt to it.
“One of the other operatives has gone dark. His internal homing device remains intact. So, we know he’s alive.”
“My orders?”
“He’s been compromised. Track him down and neutralize him.”
--
“We know there are others like you. Where are you based? Coruscant? Daro?” Rex asked. They’d been at this for hours now and all they’d gotten out of the clone was a series of hateful glares. “Tantiss?” That finally got a different reaction, the clone’s eye’s widening gave him away. “Oh, yeah, we know about Tantiss. And the clones imprisoned there. Were you one of them? Tell us where it is.” He said, more force behind his words now but again, the clone stayed quiet.
Rex shared a glance with Howzer who jutted his head and the two of them came together closer by the door.
“You need to push him harder.” Howzer stated in a hushed voice.
It had been what he’d been hoping to avoid but it was looking like all other alternatives were ineffective. Rex sighed but before he could do anything else, the door whirred open, and Fireball called his name.
“Rex.”
Rex and Howzer left the clone in the room with Nemec and met up with Fireball.
“The data puck was a target register.” Fireball revealed.
“Who was he after?” Howzer asked.
“Senator Singh. But that wasn’t the only person on his list.” He activated the device and showed the first image.
Rex saw the slight unease in Fireballs face as he changed to the next image and noticed a distinct sinking feeling in his stomach as he recognised the two targets. “Contact Echo and Hunter. We need to let them know.”
Fireball nodded and went of to do just that.
“We should bring them here.” Howzer insisted.
“No. No. I- I don’t want to involve them in this.”
“It’s too late for that.” Howzer said simply. “Crosshair is with them. This is our chance to question him.”
“Echo’s already done that.”
“But we haven’t. He knows more than he’s saying. If you want to locate Tantiss, then we need him to talk.” He moved away from him.
Rex thought through Howzer’s words and whilst he didn’t want to drag you all into this, he had to admit that Howzer was right.
Howzer paused after a couple of paces and turned around. “Rex.”
Rex angled himself to face him.
“You’ve talked about the kid before, but the woman, who is she?”
--
Strong hands gripped your hips as they backed you into the wall of the Marauder and an agreeable groan left your throat at the enthusiastic insistence of the man currently kissing you with such fervour and hunger, it made your head spin. You attempted to weave your fingers in his dark locks, but you didn’t get very far.
Not breaking away from you, Hunter gathered your wrists in one of his own hands and raised your arms above your head. His hold was strong as pressed them into the metal wall, not to hurt but to send the message that that’s precisely where you were going to keep them for this time alone that the two of you had managed to coordinate for yourselves.
You were utterly powerless to resist- not that you wanted to. You had to pull away for air eventually, but Hunter never faltered, he just turned his attentions to the rest of you and your body arched into him to rid yourselves of any offensive gaps between you.
Hunter pressed doting kisses to the skin of your neck, teeth scraping along your pulse point. “What do you want, sweetheart?” He murmured seductively.
Breathless whimpers were the only noises that came from your mouth. You were overwhelmed by him, by the feeling of his body pushing against yours, by the sensation of his touch, by his lips. Words were hopeless a hopeless venture with him against you like this.
Hunter grinned against your skin before he kissed the hollow of your throat. He pushed his thigh between your legs and relished in the soft moan that left your lips. He trailed his lips across your jaw as he rasped, “Tell me what you want.” He kissed the sensitive spot behind your ear.
Your entire body was pliant against him, and you couldn’t fathom one single word of basic due to his ministrations.
Hunter continued what he was doing, and he moved to the underside of your jaw, “Do you want my fingers?” He hovered his lips a mere few inches from yours before whispering in a low voice, “Do you want my mouth?”
And when he felt your pulse quicken at that last one, he brought his lips back to yours and kissed you deeply, teasingly. “You want my mouth, sweetheart?” He uttered softly against your lips whilst simultaneously applying more pressure between your legs with this. He swallowed your moan with another kiss before he started to lower himself to his knees.
Your hands scrambled for purchase against the wall, and you just about managed a nod as he mouthed his way down your still clothed body. You inhaled shakily as you felt his gloved hands dip under your layers stroke against the bare skin of your stomach before they suggestively toyed with the waistband of your leggings. “Yes, that’s what I want.” You panted, the dark lust you saw behind his brown eyes had you weak at the knees.
Hunter smirked up at you. “Good girl.” With that he properly took a hold of the waistband and got ready to pull them down.
And then the most objectionable and devastating of sounds materialised around you and the delicious anticipation of what was about to happen instantly evaporated as reality came crashing down around you.
Hunter paused what he was about to do and exhaled a deeply dissatisfied sigh as he readjusted your clothing.
“And I want that to be a software glitch and not our comms going off.” You grumbled; the words punctuated by you lightly banging the back of your head against the wall in annoyance.
“Hunter, (Y/N), do either of you copy?”
Hunter hung his head in his own disappointment before he stood up tall. He kissed your cheek before pressing his comm, “Yeah, we copy, Echo.” He confirmed.
“What’s going on?” You asked as both you and Hunter slipped back into your squad roles.
“Rex got in touch. We need go. Now.”
You two grabbed your gear and hurried out the Marauder to head for Echo’s ship.
--
“So, where exactly are we headed?” Hunter asked Echo as the ship travelled through hyperspace.
“It’s a base of sorts.”
“I thought your rendezvous with Gregor was top priority.”
“Yeah, well, I’ll pick him up after dropping you lot off.”
“Any idea why Rex wants us there so urgently?” You asked as you rubbed Batcher’s belly. The hound’s demands of attention were the distraction you needed from the growing nerves surrounding going to a base made entirely up of clones and although you knew they had no loyalty to the Empire, you weren’t sure how far that sentiment would extend with regards to you.
“He didn’t say. But it must be important.”
Hunter pondered over this for a moment before he caught movement out of the corner of his eye. He glanced around his chair and thoughtfully observed Crosshair and Omega- who had a toothpick of her own- and she was mirroring the way Crosshair was using it. The behaviour was typically exhibited by her when she felt particularly close to someone or looked up to them in some way. Clearly their experience in Tantiss had it had brought them close in ways he hadn’t considered or in ways they- particularly Crosshair- were yet to fully realise.
You and Wrecker had been paying Batcher some attention, but you stopped as you noticed the way Hunter had looked between Crosshair and Omega. You saw what he saw but as you reached into the Force around him to get a gauge of his feelings, it wasn’t jealousy or hurt behind his eyes, it was more contemplative. She’ll have to learn to be a moody teenager from someone. You smiled over at him as he half-turned to face you.
You felt a wet nose nudge your palm and you went back to petting Batcher.
--
Teth
Rex and Howzer watched as the ship landed. Once the doors opened, they went to meet up with the oncoming group.
“They don’t look happy to see us.” Wrecker said. “Just like old times, huh?” He remarked cheerfully with a nudge to Crosshair’s back.
“Are you alright?” Echo asked as he saw you had yet to follow the others out.
“Yup.” You answered distantly as your hand subconsciously came to unclip and reclip your lightsaber to your belt.
Echo picked up on your tense fidgeting. “Rex assured me that it wouldn’t be an issue.”
“I know, I know.” You inhaled a calming breath and jogged to catch up with the group.
--
“Thanks for coming.” Rex said as Hunter’s squad came to a halt in front of him. He then nodded at you and Omega.
You had heard the hushed whispers and murmurs from the surrounding clones as you’d approached the rest of the group and you saw the brief moment of shock that flashed across the features of the clone next to Rex. “They already knew before I walked out here.” You guessed, their reactions and shared looks told you that it wasn’t just because they only just noticed the lightsaber on your belt.
“I, uh, filled a few of them in before your arrival. Word travels fast but some of them still didn’t believe it and, well, some of us knew already. I’ve been to quite a few Outer Rim planets… you haven’t exactly been laying low in recent months.” Rex replied, glancing curiously as you.
You sighed, “Fair point. It’s certainly been an… interesting time.”
“There’s nothing to worry about.” Rex reassured you. “We all have that past to contend with.”
“Well, that’s comforting I suppose.” You said lightly before you fell into place beside Hunter.
“It’s good to see you, Rex.” Hunter said sincerely.
“Wish I felt the same.”
You all glanced to the hostile voice of the clone beside Rex who was glaring at Crosshair.
“I have unfinished business with this one.” Howzer stated as he kept his sights firmly on Crosshair. “Remember me?”
Crosshair just stared at him blankly.
“Surprised I’m alive? Most of my squad from Ryloth is dead because of you.” Howzer spat.
“Easy Howzer.” Rex cautioned. “I know you two have history. But we’re all on the same side now.”
Howzer only released a doubtful scoff, but he eased off.
“Why’d you call us here, Captain?” Hunter asked.
“We have something to show you. Follow me.” He led the way to the base.
You got ready to follow behind, but Echo’s voice made you and Wrecker pause.
“Omega!”
Omega turned and ran back to the ship.
“I was planning on giving you this after I made a few more modifications. But, uh, now’s as good a time as any.”
Omega released an excited gasp as she examined the weapon. “An energy crossbow. Where did you get it?” She eagerly took it from him.
Echo laughed, “Well, I’ve made a few interesting contacts across the galaxy.”
She activated it and the green glow of energy hummed strongly before she turned it off. “It’s perfect. Thank you, Echo.”
“Well, I won’t be gone long. You better head inside and, uh, keep them in line.”
They shared in a salute before Omega dashed off the ship to rejoin you and Wrecker and the three of you made your own way to the building.
--
“Your numbers are growing.” Hunter commented as he saw the clones in the room.
“Well, we need all the help we can get. Once we find the exact coordinates of the Tantiss Base, we have to hit it hard if we’re gonna pull our brothers out of there.” Rex said, coming to a stop by the centre console. “I have questions about the facility but that’s not the only reason why I sent for you.” He picked up the puck and chucked it to Hunter. “We recovered a target list from an Imperial operative. And both of them are on it.”
“Not a surprise. You’ve got a Jedi and someone who escaped Imperial custody.” Crosshair replied, sounding bored as he put a toothpick between his lips.
“So did you. But you’re not on the list.” Howzer retorted.
“Guess I’m not as valuable to them.”
“Or you’re feeding them information.” Howzer accused.
Hunter frowned at that and came to his brother’s defence. “You’re gonna have to back down, Captain.” He warned sternly.
“You expect us to believe he was held on Tantiss for months, but he doesn’t know how to get back there?” Howzer said angrily.
Crosshair removed his toothpick and faced up against Howzer. “Whether you believe me or not, it’s the truth.” He waited for his words to sink in before speaking again, “But I’m not loyal to the Empire any longer.”
That wasn’t enough for Howzer. “Your squad may trust you. But I don’t.”
Any further argument was cut short as the doors whirred open again and they all looked to see you, Wrecker and Omega come in.
You almost ran into the clone that was exiting at the same time and your eyes widened as you saw his face. “Fireball?!” You gasped as you recognised the clone that had been your trusty second in command of the battalion you had been assigned during the war.
“General?” Fireball replied, completely stunned as he instinctively straightened his posture. When he’d seen your holo-image, part of him still couldn’t believe it. Even with Rex’s confirmation, he still had his doubts but that all vanished that very second as he heard your voice. As he saw your face. As you were standing in front of him. It really was you.
You couldn’t help it; you gave him a quick hug. “It’s been years! I’d heard Master Tobar Ka-Teen took over from me…” You trailed off and cursed yourself as you realised the added effect of your words and you immediately became apologetic. “Fireball-”
“About that day… I did- and Order 66- I couldn’t- And I know if it had been you, I know I wouldn’t have been able to resist-” He stuttered.
You placed a hand on his shoulder. “It wasn’t your fault, Fireball. I’m not holding anything against you.”
Fireball released a sigh of relief before he said, “There’s something else you need to know, General.” He jutted his head over to the others before he headed out the room.
You then saw the way Rex, Hunter, Crosshair and Howzer were all glancing between you and Omega. You felt the tension in the Force around them as you approached. “What’s going on?”
“The Empire’s targeting you-” Crosshair started to say.
Wrecker let out a dry chuckle. “No surprise there.”
“Yeah, we already knew that.” You replied with an unconcerned shrug.
“And Omega… again.” Crosshair added.
That got your attention and achieved a sufficient amount of worry. You came to stand just beside Wrecker and behind the young girl. Your voice was serious as you asked, “Do we know why?”
“Not yet.” Rex answered before he addressed Omega, “Why were they after you before?”
“To force Nala Se to cooperate and conduct certain experiments.”
“Which were what?”
“She was working on something involving M-Count? I don’t know what that means, but they were taking blood samples from everyone, even me.”
“They were looking at your M-count?” You repeated. You thought through the possibilities but dismissed the main one that ran through your head because surely you would’ve sensed if she had that particular potential. You racked your brain for other theories but came up empty.
“Uh huh.” Omega glanced up at you curiously.
Her inquisitive look matched the expression the rest of them were giving you. “I know how it can be significant, but I have no idea as to how it would relate to her or any clone that matter.” You admitted ruefully.
Rex took a knee in front of Omega. “What else can you tell us?”
“When we escaped, there wasn’t enough time to free the other clones. We have to find a way to get them out.” She said resolutely.
Rex rested a hand on her shoulder. “We will.”
The door opened again, and Fireball re-entered holding a bowl of food. “Chow time!” He announced. “Gregor’s recipe, with a few spicy modifications.”
“Oh, now you’re talking.” Wrecker said eagerly, leading the way as he, Batcher and Omega went to the table.
You watched them go with a small smile before Crosshair’s voice brought you back to the discussion at hand.
“Wait. There’s more you should know.” He paused for a second as he readied himself for what he was about to say. “Not all of the clones on Tantiss are prisoners. Some are loyal to the Empire. There is a division of clones trained as specialised operatives and initiated into a secret deep cover program run by Hemlock.” His voice grew quieter as he recalled the time spent in that room. “Their identities are erased. They undergo conditioning. The few that make it through come out different.”
“If the program’s so secretive, how do you know about it?” Howzer questioned suspiciously.
“Because they tried to make me into one of them.”
“Tried?”
“It didn’t work. Being defective is in my nature.” He finished his explanation.
“You’ve encountered one before. The assassin on Coruscant.” Hunter said.
“We’ve known they existed but never knew exactly what they were.” Rex said cagily.
It wasn’t just their visual mannerisms that gave them away, you felt the evasiveness around them. “What aren’t you telling us?”
Rex hesitated a moment before he said, “We captured one. I’ve tried questioning him, but he hasn’t been very cooperative.”
“This is where you come in.” Howzer said to you.
You noticed the grimace on Rex’s face and regarded the clone captain warily. “What do you expect me to do about it?”
“Well, you’re a Jedi, aren’t you?”
You gave a single slow nod of your head as you awaited further information.
“You’ve got certain… skillsets.” He took half a step closer to you. “Ones of persuasion that we don’t have.”
You realised what he was getting at. You shook your head. “That only works on the weak-minded and from what Crosshair just described, he’s anything but. No clone is.”
“You could make it work though if you really had to. You could get him to say what we needed him to.”
“Captain-” You objected as you sensed his growing desperation- it was rolling off him in waves.
“But could you do it?” He took another step towards you.
“Doing so verges on torture, Captain.” You attempted to explain. You felt Hunter gravitate closer to you in response to Howzer’s movement.
“But could you do it?” He asked again.
You remembered the last time three Jedi tried that- against Cad Bane of all people- and the impact had nearly been disastrous. You held his stare with a strong one of your own and spoke steadily and with plenty of conviction behind your words. “One, I don’t have that kind of power.”
“But-”
“Two, even if I wanted to, it could destroy his mind and you get nothing.”
“The time for debate is long gone. We need the information.” Howzer insisted. “It’s a risk-”
Further debate was silenced as Crosshair interrupted, traces of panic in his voice. “You have one here? Alive?”
Rex nodded.
“Impossible. The Empire would be on top of us already. They have ways of tracking their operatives.”
“We scanned him. He’s clear.” Howzer said.
“It’s not the kind of tracker your scans would pick up.” Crosshair asserted. “Hemlock’s smarter than that.”
“Where’s the operative? Show us.” Hunter requested.
--
Sneaking into the base had been all to easy and as he scanned the room ahead with the scope of his sniper rifle, he saw the other two targets in the room, but they weren’t his first priority. He’d bide his time with them. He retreated back outside.
First, he had to give Scorch the news about the targets and his location for the Recovery Strike Team.
Then there was the other operative to take care of.
Then he could get his hands on the next set of targets that were so easily within his grasp.
--
The five of you stood in the interrogation room and studied the cuffed clone in front of you.
You weren’t sure if it was solely because of the look of pure disgust he gave you as you walked in, but there was disturbance in the Force that you couldn’t just dismiss. Your guard was up.
Crosshair inhaled a sharp breath as the clone then looked directly at him, “We need to leave. Now.”
You glanced at Crosshair and saw a level of fear you’d never witnessed from the clone before. It sent a chill down your spine.
“If you want answers so badly, why aren’t you asking him?” The clone sneered as he looked at the familiar clone ahead of him. “Right, brother?”
“He’s lying.” Crosshair shifted uncomfortably as all of your eyes fixed on him.
The dark, menacing voice of the operative spoke up again. “You’re right about one thing. They are coming for all of you.”
An explosion suddenly rang outside.
“Comms are down.” Rex said as he attempted to check in with those patrolling the perimeter. Another dark chuckle from the assassin clone told him their time was up. “We move out. Now!”
Howzer opened the door but just as he went to press the button, you sensed what was about to come.
“Rex!” You shoved him down just as the shots fired and dove to cover but you couldn’t stop them as they hit the operative in the centre of his chest. You tugged your coverings up just as the others put on their helmets.
“We’ve got a shooter out here!” Wrecker yelled as he put his helmet on and provided a round of cover fire for you all to get out of that room and to better cover.
“Shots coming from the back of the room!” Omega yelled from her position.
“Nemec, we need to get comms online” Rex said.
Nemec went to the centre console at a crouch, but a shot made contact with the exposed wire and all he saw was the light of an explosion as his body was flung backwards into a crate. He struggled to get back up as he fought for consciousness.
“Backup plan. Into the command post!” Rex ordered before looking at Wrecker and Omega. “I’ll cover you!” He timed it out. “Go!” He stood up and fired on the assailant as he helped Nemec to his feet.
You began running with the others but paused as you realised Fireball had split off from the rest of you. You saw him grab a flamethrower and run directly towards the attacker. “Fireball!” You yelled in warning, but Hunter pulled your arm to get you to follow the rest of them back to the room.
Rex could only watch in dismay as Fireball took a shot to the shoulder and crashed into a crate of grenades, but the flamethrower was still activated.
The resulting series of violent explosions had the roof of the base collapsing and Rex was left with no choice but to sprint back to the room. He dived through the entrance just as it was completely blocked by rubble, and it was then he felt a stray piece of rock collide against his helmet and black spots clouded his vision.
--
The Recovery Strike Team entered the planet’s atmosphere.
“Commander, we’ve lost contact with the operative.”
“Prepare to land and set blasters to stun. Our orders are to retrieve the targets alive.”
Next Chapter>
Tagging: @noeasyisnoisy, @arctrooper69, @dominoeffectsworld, @andreaaxy, @notgonnaedit, @nightmonkeysstuff
63 notes · View notes
ascendanttarot · 9 months
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PAC: Messages From Your Spirit Guides
Hi everyone! This PAC will cover whether your spirit guides have any messages or guidance for you. This is a little shorter than the last PAC but only a little bit, promise! I'll list a few signs for every pile before your reading to ensure you have picked the right pile for yourself. If you resonate with one or more signs, that is meant to be your reading. And! You’ll get a channelled song! :)
Please remember your fate is not set in stone so your answers may change depending on the actions you take and will take if you please. Tarot is not a substitute for professional advice. The images I’ve used are not mine.
From left to right: Pile 1, Pile 2, Pile 3
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Pile 1
Signs:
You play guitar or favour the sound of acoustic guitar in your songs
You listen to the following bands/artists: Hozier, Florence + the Machine, Mitski, and other similar artists
This is a weird one, but when cleaning you like buying the sprays/wipes/detergent with a fruitier smell?
You like going on nature walks
You read poetry
Your cards: The Tower, Queen of Cups rx, (clarified by the Six of Swords rx) Page of Wands
Your message: Something unfolded in ways you could have never imagined. It’s like all your backup plans fell apart too, and your optimism has been taken away from you. I just heard ‘victim of circumstance’. This is a difficult message to give, but your guides are saying whatever happened, happened beyond anyone’s control. You tried to shield yourself from these difficult emotions by hardening your heart, creating distance between you and your feelings... but you’re spirit guides are asking you, “Is this really worth it all?”. It won’t be an easy feat to move on from this situation, and your guides understand that. However, they’re saying that when the time comes and the right opportunity is in front of you to take that first step of healing, please take it. The best part of your life requires a childlike sense of wonder. It’s going to require a lot more determination and ambition than what you’re feeling now. Your guides are saying to take your time to feel messy, and when it’s time to heal, don’t rush yourself to do that too. They’re here for you if you ask them. They believe in you even if you don’t believe in yourself, but they are waiting patiently and happily for a time when you’ll start standing by your back too.
Thank you for letting me be your reader, Pile 1!
Song: In Your Own Sweet Time by Zaska, Karen Cowley and Hozier
Pile 2
Signs:
You have an alternative sense of style
You love 80s music. I just heard Wham and The Cure to name a few of the bands that popped up in my intuition
Odd sign to give, but you may have had a vaporwave phase? If you know, you know
You like Fantasy and Sci-Fi books and shows
Another odd message to give here—you may be sensitive to touch, but it goes both ways? Like you can only wear certain fabrics, or you like soft things, but also people may say you give good hugs
Your Cards: 8 of Swords rx, 6 of Cups, The World
Your Message: I just saw the image of your spirit guides popping open a bottle of champagne with a knife before chucking (yes, that violently) streamers and confetti! You know why? Because. You. Did. That. You’ve just come out of a period in your life when you had to do some intense shadow work. You’ve worked on your biases, and have started to fix your flawed systems on your environment and yourself; your spirit guides could not be more proud of you. They’re celebrating 24 hours a day 7 days a week because that chapter of your life is over! This new phase of your life will be given gently to you with the love and compassion you deserve. I think this may be an opportunity to let yourself be seen by others again. At the very least you’ll be hanging out with old friends and making new ones, but at the most, I’m seeing possibly an opportunity for a project to start online. Either way, your spirit guides will have your back for that in the future. For now, though, they’re asking you to put your feet up and high-five yourself for how far you’ve come!
Thank you for letting me be your reader, Pile 2!
Your Song: Blame It on the Boogie by The Jacksons (I’m serious, they’re having a party right now haha!)
Pile 3
Signs:
You prefer the dusk over the dawn
You like RnB, so artists like Victoria Monét and Ashanti might be familiar artists to have in your playlists. I also heard Destiny’s Child and Ms. Lauryn Hill
I feel like you might like, collect, or work with crystals and metals. I just saw some people here may wear protective jewellery
You like sports, or were heavily involved in sports when you were younger, but you aren’t anymore
I just heard ‘helping hand’, so you may just be a really helpful and generous person. You’d be the friend people go to if they need advice on something
Your Cards: 2 of Wands, 2 of Swords, King of Cups
Your Message: Okay this feels pretty straightforward. Your spirit guides want you to know that you’re coming into a divine partnership (not necessarily romantic if that’s not you’re thing or if you’re aromantic, so this could be a friendship or a business partner even) very soon. With the emphasis on the number two in this reading, this may correlate with timings in your life. You may meet this person in 2 weeks, 2 months, or even within the span of 2 years, but there’s a strong message of divine timing working in your favour. I feel you may have issues trusting the people around you to have good intentions because of negative experiences in the past. This person won’t break that mental belief for you, you’ll do that yourself, but they will certainly be the catalyst for it. Maybe the reason why you’re so jaded is because you’ve hoped for this so long the hope soured to cynicism, but this is not the natural state of your soul. This person will offer you the emotionally mature partnership you’ve dreamed of, with a sensitivity for you and your feelings you aren’t used to. Your spirit guides can’t wait for you to meet them because I’m hearing this relationship will be healing for all the parties involved. They’re with you on this every step of the way.
Thank you for letting me be your reader, Pile 3!
Your Song: Love Is on My Side by Brandy
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borzoilover69 · 3 months
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Tips and Tricks for krita (part two electric boogaloo)
Ok so this one is going to be a doozy because im going to include a lot of examples and tips for how to use filters (AKA YOUR NEW BEST FRIEND)
Link to part one.
Ok so filters in krita can be a doozy so ill cover the ones i use in my art the most, these will be adjust, artistic, and enhance dropdowns. I will be using my art pieces to show how i modify my art- colourwise!
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Obviously, start off with opening the filter menu up. Color balance brings you to this menu, where you can play around with the colour of your shadows, your midtones, and higlights. Its a lot of trial and error, just messing around to see what fits, and its how i got to this point. through just pushing the dials up and down. Honestly, a lot of this part of the tutorial is going to be me telling you to hit those dials and levers like you dont know nobody.
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Even just small modifications as you can see can play so much of a difference. For here, i upped the cool tones for john, and upped the warm ones for dave. Colour theory without colour theorising i suppose you could say.
Crosschannel adjustment curves can help with contrast and colour intensity. Usually i have one point which i use to move up and down per my whims to control how bright my work is, and it can really help with really bringing out those colours so it doesnt all fall into one hue. Colour adjustment curves works similiarly, play around with them to get the desired effect.
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Krita also has HSV adjustment, but i usually use just the hue and saturation. Theyre pretty self explanatory, and can switch up your palette in pretty fun ways.
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Now we move on to the ARTISTIC part. Again, i recommend you play around with them yourself, but i find index colours works really well for making really pretty art really fast! You just put in a few colours with descending lightest to darkest and you get an awesome art piece! Id say this is useful for pixel artists, but also useful for other parties. I might just start using this more myself. Its so easy wtf.
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AND FINALLY THE MOST IMPORTANT THING.
HOW MY ART IS SO CRUNCHY.
If youve been following me for a while you probably noticed theres a slight crunch to my art. It gives it a slight bit of texture and makes it noticable. How do i do it?
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You're welcome.
insert image of face on 90% opacity and comedic text for purpose.
Alternatively, if youre looking for a sbahj level of crunchiness, smack that "mean removal"for some fun.
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Thats all! Happy drawing.
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riizebabie444 · 1 month
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𝙟𝙪𝙥𝙞𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙟𝙪𝙣𝙘𝙩 𝙪𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙪𝙨 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜 🌠
🌠 ─── the jupiter-uranus conjucntion is upon us so here is a reading to cover how the power and energy of this astrological alignment will affect you.
🌠 ─── picking your pile: take a deep breath and allow your soul to centre itself. when you feel your mind balanced and cleared, allow yourself to be drawn to an image. your eyes may gravitate to one, or you may close your eyes and feel which image is calling out.
🌠 ─── be sure to check out my other readings and don’t forget to share and give feedback. disclaimer: all readings done are for entertainment only. please do not use my tarot readings as a replacement for legitimate advice.
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୨୧ ─── masterlist. paid readings. exchange rules.
donations. games/events. feedback.
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pile one
how it will affect you
pile one, with the page of pentacles i'm seeing that this will affect you academically or or career wise. you will feel a spring of inspiration for learning things. if you've been procrastinating tasks or studying, you will experience a refreshing perspective on studying and completing tasks. you will identify your end goals, gain clarity on your manifestations. it could be a project also, or a hobby. something you've had in mind for a long time but just pushed the thought away. you keep saying i'll do it eventually but that hasn't happened yet. with this conjunction, you will shift from thought to action, you may even be starting something entirely new, but it does feel like learning and education is involved. you want success in the long term and you will realise the steps you need to take to achieve that. the shift the conjunction will bring you will push you towards reaching your goals through learning and motivation, and excitement about education.
messages for you
the messages are about opportunities coming your way. you may have missed some significant opportunities in the past. maybe you're missing them now. i see you are not recognising when the perfect opportunity is right in front of you. so when you do recognise an opportunity, you wish it would be better. but you already missed the better one. pay more attention to the chances coming your way, and take action to seize them. you will face a hard time filled with lack and instability if you do not focus and take the opportunities when they come.
how to benefit the most
you're hitting hard times. this might not be relevant to all but i do see loss, scarcity. this can mean something material, like money or a job. but it can also mean something more spiritual and personal, such as losing faith or trust in someone you love. it's disappointing, right? the conjunct here wants you to use this as motivation. every loss can be turned into a gain. try to see the silver linings because if you focus on the negatives, you will only get negatives. the work with the power of the conjunct, open your mind to the possibilities. find the good in the bad because it does exist. accept that it's okay to lose and feel like you have nothing. but what's not okay is to simper away in your self-pity and give up on trying to find happiness. to benefit the most from this alignment, you need to change your mindset. stop being the victim of your life and start being the hero! every hero goes through hardships, don't they? so get up, dust yourself off and keep trying.
pile two
how will it affect you
the energy of this alignment can cause you to be overwhelmed with many tasks and activities. it may make you busier than usual. you'll be rushing from one end to the other, and have very little breaks. but the thing is, you keep telling yourself it's fine. while you may have balance, it can still feel difficult to maintain. i think this conjunct will give you the spurt of energy to be able to handle it all. alternatively, it is the conjunct that is making you like this. so many things to do and not enough time to do them, but you still want to. you will feel uncomfortable sitting still, so you need something to do. you may even be torn balancing between different areas of your life, for example, your work and your relationship. however, this conjunct will prove to you just how capable and resourceful you are. that despite the overbearing nature of it, you are still adaptable and flexible to get through everything to the best of your ability. you will even surprise yourself. when everything has calmed down, you with think: i don't know how i did it but i'm proud of myself!
messages for you
you may have some unrealistic dreams. you may desire them so much. but whatever it is, you need to open up to the possibility that it is simply not meant for you. this is particularly if you are an idealistic person. you can achieve emotional fulfilment even when it is not picture perfect how you imagine it to be. don't over indulge at your own expense on things that are not feasible. you need to be more grounded and honest with what is actually possible. but don't worry, you will still find happiness even then.
how to benefit the most
get in touch with your romantic side. take yourself out on a date, or share a date with a special someone (eg partner, friend, sibling). just have a fun relaxing date spending time with someone you love. if there are new opportunities or positions coming your way, don't be afraid to jump right in. get involved with your present, appreciate what is going on around you at this very moment. stop focusing so much on what could be, and appreciate the now. the you from ten years ago probably can't imagine where you are right now. so stop worrying, because the you right now can't even fathom where you'll be in ten more years. leave it up to fate to lead you where you're meant to be and enjoy life as it is in this moment.
pile three
how it will affect you
there is so much energy here. the conjunct will open your throat chakra, you will have so much to say, to think, to express. there is just so much to be said. you might be more talkative that usual, your mind might be busy running on overdrive. you may feel inclined to express yourself more with clothes or hobbies etc. you will feel more independent and in touch with yourself. you will embody confidence and be more outgoing than usual. you may come off a bit pushy to others. but your inner instincts are telling you to be courageous. your overall approach to life will be energetic. this boost of confidence and energy from the conjunct can go both ways though, so make sure you make decisions carefully. and since you will be so bubbly, you may often crash. so better take care of yourself mentally.
messages for you
you may have regrets and disappointments. but you also have so much to look forward to! you cannot undo what has been done. but you can forgive and let go. forgive yourself, forgive others. learn that peace is incomparably better that holding onto the past. loss is painful, but it can either lead to rotted roots or a beautiful blooming flower. it is your choice to decide how you want to end up.
how to benefit the most
plan. plan, plan, plan. have your details in order. everything needs a plan and sure, not everything goes according to plan but if you have a plan, it will still work out better than if you didn't. don't get used to going with the flow. start adding some structure and order into your life. also, don't be afraid to step out of your comfort zone. this conjunct is the perfect time to embrace new change. so be open to new experiences and get out there. do things you're scared of. say yes to the thing you think you're not good at. expand your horizons and make your life all the more successful and richer.
pile four
how it will affect you
you will embody that masculine energy. you may find yourself in leadership positions, being a guide to others. people looking up to you. and you will feel quite natural in this role. even if you have not been a leader before, you may be forced into this position with no other choice and you will find that you are pretty good at being a leader. you may overall feel more ambition with life, you may strive for more leadership opportunities. you may also become someone who inspires and influences others. it could be something as simple as other people taking inspiration from your style to being the leader in a very important project. you will feel more passionate than usual, and may be pushed out of your comfort zone for whatever reason. but you will be stern and motivated. you won't step down and you will deal will face any problem head on.
message for you
you are or will be surrounded by abundance and wealth. some of your manifestations will come into your life soon. or, you may lose your need of "wanting" and simply learn to be happy with what you have. your hard work will pay off and the rewards will be reaped. everything is coming together, be proud of how hard you worked for this!
how to benefit the most
harmony is so important for you to not lose track. this conjunct will give you a boost of energy, but that doesn't mean you should overdo it and burn out on the third day of trying. take it easy and find your balance. stability is key. prioritise your health and happiness because it will keep you going. celebrate everything, big and small. every little thing that happens to you, everything you do. even celebrate others. happiness and celebration will serve you well. visit home, your family, your friends. you will feel welcomed and supported, search for those feelings because for one reason or another, it will benefit you.
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lacefuneral · 7 months
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ok i've seen some posts about the tumblr alternative cohost but none that were actually helpful so!
(disclaimer: i am very new to this website. users who have been there longer can and should chime in with additions and/or corrections)
Cohost Introduction Post
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What is cohost?
Cohost is a fledgling website that is essentially a tumblr clone, but with its own culture and site-specific features. It is also very much a work in progress. You are encouraged to talk in the cohost forum to suggest changes for devs, report bugs, and upvote other people's suggestions. This website WILL grow and change over time. And as such, I do not know if/when the information I share here will be outdated. Edit: To answer an ask I received, anyone can join cohost without an invite. It used to be invite-only. It is not this way anymore.
Is "adult content" allowed there?
Yes. Cohost is not on the app store, meaning that it is not subject to Apple's specifications. You can post illustrations, writing, and photographs (cohost does not support any video formats at this time, just gifs). Cohost has an elaborate filtering and trigger warning system (moreso than tumblr), and you can disable adult content for your entire account or for individual tags. I actually don't engage with the adult content at all on there. Visual CSEM (both real and fictional) is specifically forbidden (although frankly I think the guidelines could be stricter wrt written content. Still, does seem to handle this better than AO3 does, going as far to say that written content about real minors is forbidden.)
How are minors protected?
The minimum age to join cohost is 16, and requires proof of parental permission to join. Users who are under 18 are automatically age-gated and cannot view adult content.
If cohost isn't on the app store, how is it used?
You can, of course, use cohost on a computer, but it is designed with mobile in mind. Opening the website on any IOS browser, clicking "share", and then "add to home screen" will install an app for you to use. The same can be done on an android. There is a guide here.
How does cohost work?
First, you create an account. Then you wait for approximately two days (read: weekdays) for the account to be activated. This is done to prevent spam bots. In the meantime, edit your profile. List some interests, your pronouns, your other social media links. Give yourself an icon. Note: icon and banner file sizes are small. You may need to shrink and compress images.
After the two days are up, make your first post! Write a basic introduction (with what you feel comfortable you feel sharing) and list some interests you like, maybe some hobbies, media, etc. And then tag this post with "#welcome to cohost". This will let existing members know that someone new has joined, and they may initiate conversation and/or follow you.
Next, go to the search and type in "The Cohost Global Feed" and click on the tag. Bookmark this tag. This is essentially one giant community space where you can find random users. (There is currently some discourse on the website as to whether this tag existing is a "bad thing" or not because "cohost isn't supposed to have a global tag". Just ignore that lol). Next, go back to search and type in things you like. TV shows, maybe. Video games. Music. Anything. See if people have posted in the tags. Follow them. Comment on their stuff. Click "like" to bookmark the post if you want to.
Most crucially, make sure that you bookmark the actual tag so you can look in that tag again later without having to manually type it each and every time. Also, you get a feed called "bookmarked tags" which allows you to scroll through all of them at once, which replaces the "for you" feature other websites have.
You can "share" a post (called "rebug" in user slang) which serves the same purpose as a reblog on tumblr. In a rebug, you can add your own tags or comment in the body of the post. Cohost users do not talk in tags as much as tumblr users - they tend to prefer to speak in the body of a rebug, or in the comment section (replies). At this time, you cannot view all reblogs. But you can view all comments in the comment section. Any post that is rebugged will preserve the tags of the OP, with any additional tags added being attributed to you. Rebugs are named after the website mascot Eggbug, a purple bee-like insect.
Posts are called "chosts" - and shitposting is called "shitchosting." Two examples of global shitposting tags are "#css crimes" - which is when a person does goofy things with the HTML/CSS editor to make colorful text, fake chat windows, and such - and "#shitchosting" which is a general shitposting tag. I've also seen people use tags like "#random".
If a post makes you laugh, check out the OP's profile. See if they post frequently, and if you have any common interests. If you realize you want to block or mute someone instead, you can.
You can send asks just like on tumblr, but your inbox must be manually opened first. So remember to do that.
How do I look at my own blog?
This is one of my gripes about the UI. You would think, intuitively, you would click here (at the top of the screen). But you would be wrong!
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It is ACTUALLY under the sidebar menu, called "Profile." And I'm not the only one to to complain about this. (To get back to your dashboard, by the way, you click on the cohost logo.)
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Are there sideblogs?
Yes! Each sidepage (sideblog) has its OWN set of likes AND followed pages (blogs). This allows you to easily switch between multiple sets of dashboards. A lot of users use this to have a SFW dashboard and an adult content dashboard. But it works like tumblr, too. You can have a side page/dashboard for whatever you'd like. Maybe one of your pages is for programming. Maybe another is for photography. You switch between your pages by clicking the arrow next to your icon/username at the top of the screen. ("Ohhhhh.... THAT'S what that's for.")
What's the userbase on there like?
Mostly programmers. Trans people. Furry artists. Plural systems. Furry trans plural programmers. Certainly a lot of shitposters. The website is trans-run and, as such, has zero tolerance for TERFs. Everyone seems pretty friendly from what I can tell. And there's very much a culture of "follow someone randomly based on their vibes" that doesn't happen as much on tumblr. Tumblr is more like "I really like this TV show, I'm going to follow 40 blogs about just this interest." Because the cohost community is so much smaller, there is a lot less content overall, especially fandom content. You can't follow 40 fandom pages because your fandom tag has a total of 3 posts, all made by one person approximately a year ago (well. for me anyway).
Cohost, then, actually has much more in common with real-life socialization. You seek out people with interests that may be very different from your own, and to find a common interest is very exciting! Unlike tumblr, you are encouraged to tag as much as possible. This allows your posts to be seen, to find common interests. And, of course, don't forget to look in "#Welcome To Cohost" too! You may find some new friends there.
What file formats can I post in?
Currently, I am aware of basic image formats working (like jpeg, png) animated gifs, and mp3s. You currently cannot upload videos to cohost. I believe the reason is not related to server costs, but rather as a way to curb the uploading of copyrighted content.
How does cohost make money?
There are no ads, and yet, as far as I am aware, cohost is operating comfortably. There is, however, an entirely optional "cohost plus" that is $5 USD a month. Currently, there are a few perks, but not enough to convince me.
What if I think something about cohost should change?
Cohost has a forum where users can submit ideas for features and other users can discuss/upvote those ideas.
Here is a list of posts made for newcomers to read:
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hobgoblinns · 8 months
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you can put the word fuck once in every season of nuwho. Where is it going?
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what a great question!
s1: i wanted to choose something funny, but i think nine screaming FUCKING KILL YOURSELF at that dalek would go hard af. but also…… nine and rose have the kind of relationship where i’m sure she’d jokingly say “oh fuck you” every time the doctor takes a cheap shot at humans
s2: i already posted tonight about wanting ten to be allowed to say “fuck you, mickey” (specifically in rise of the cybermen when mickey gets mad at him for favouring rose). but right now i kind of love the image of rose in doomsday throwing herself at that wall and screaming FUCK!!!!!!
s3: the tensimm fan in me wants to replace “are you asking me out on a date?” with “are you trying to fuck?”. but i think it would be more gratifying if, in the same episode, we got to see martha say “fuck you, i’ll do what i like” to the doctor when he tells her not to call home
s4: this is DONNA we’re talking about. you expect me to choose just one? well. alright. “i was asleep, in my clothes, like a fucking kid!”. imagine how much it would hurt if all this time she’s been censoring herself and then, with her memory wiped, she’s suddenly back to cussing the hell out of everyone she meets
2009/2010 specials (yes im cheating shhh): in the end of time: “i had fucking estates”.
s5: river: ooh, i’m going to be a professor someday? doctor: (softly) fuuuuuuuck….
s6: instead of that amazing “the doctor is very dear to me. but you know what else he is? not here” speech that amy gives, she should just say “fuck you madame kovarian” and murder her in cold blood. genuinely like, amy was exhibiting insane restraint for a mother who’d had her child taken from her.
s7: “i didn’t know when i was well off. all fucking twelve of them.” “no sir — all fucking thirteen!”
s8: again, this is TWELVE. almost every line feels like a pg malcolm tucker. but i’m going to go with dark water’s “can you hurry up please or i’m going to hit you with my fucking shoe”
s9: easiest one yet: “get up, off your fucking arse, and win”.
s10: missy and the master: “hold me” “fuck me” “make me” (this scene made me queasy but those two are horribly fucked up and would 100% say this)
s11: i have only seen this season in snippets but i think someone in ‘rosa’ has got to tell a racist to go fuck themselves
s12: during the master’s whole pathetic “wahhh kneel call me master” spiel i think the doctor should have just told him to fuck off. when i saw that scene i was yelling at the screen for him to fuck off so i think she should be allowed to tell him to as well. or maybe spray him with a water pistol like a bad cat
s13: for some reason the first thing that comes to mind is evil dan but tbh he doesn’t need to say fuck. he’s already powerful enough. instead in that opening scene when thirteen is trying to get the voice activated handcuffs to open: “RELEASE!!! oh, maybe i was scottish when i set them up…….. fucking RRRRRELEASE!!!!!!!!”
s13 specials (cheating again shh): tegan: and yes, i WOULD like to go in the fucking tardis!!! (alternatively: “i know these teeth… what… WHAT… WHAT THE FUCK????”)
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wishingstarinajar · 3 months
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I know, I know I'm a scratched record
But I'm dying to hear your thoughts on the Wakfu finale when you get to it!
I just finished watching it and it's uuh... hmm. I read people saying the finale was "satisfactory" but I am not fully on board with that sentiment.
Too much left unanswered, not enough wrapped up, too rushed to get to the end.
I know the Waven game is a continuation of sorts, it takes place decades after Wakfu's conclusion so that game might hold some answers or closure, buuuuttt... I'm not interested enough in the game to play and find out. I guess I've grown a bit tired of the whole cross-media info/lore some franchises love to do (like Blizzard and covering important info across the Warcraft games, books and short stories).
Wakfu season 4 obviously has an open ending, no matter that it is the final season, so who knows what might follow. I'm just a little saddened that the story picked up a little too late this season but the animation, particularly during action scenes, was pretty great... when not using the same static images of characters xDD They loved that a little too much but I understand the budget wasn't that big so I can't really fault Ankama for it.
Did I like this season? Mmmyyeeaaah, it's a mixed bag. Better than season 3 but not better than the first two seasons or even the OVA episodes. Glad it exists but I don't feel super satisfied with its conclusion.
HEAVY SPOILERS ahead, so be mindful but gonna share some thoughts:
Seeing Joris play a bigger part in the second half of the 4th season, and him vibing with Adamaï made me very giddy and happy. Love that for them, hope they become good friends. And thank fek neither of them died. RIP, Qilby, Armand and Brakmar (maybe?). The guys who needed to redeem themselves got their chance, at least.
Goddess Eliatrope was a big disappointment and an unlikeable character but I guess that was kind of the point...? Angry that she totally ignored Chibi and Grougal, like what the fuck even? Didn't even show a hint of acknowledgment towards them. What if they wanted to meet mom, huh?? And what even happened to Baltazar and Glip, who were in Emrub with the same kids that were asleep in Goddess Eliatrope's belly? What did she do with them?
But hey, at least my headcanon that the Sadida and Eliatropes will combine into a single kingdom/people (which I also wrote about in my Rebirth fic) actually happening was pretty satisfying x'D It even has Wakfu-infused trees, om nom nom.
A little frustrated with Necroworld (not the same Necroworld from the Transformers: Lost Light comics) because it's supposed to be a different planet in some other universe but it had dofus (dragon eggs) and races of the Twelve like Sadida, Sram and Sacrier. It was pretty confusing... Imo, it should have been something similar to The Upside Down (Stranger Things), or an alternate version of the world of Twelve rather than a completely separate place. But eh...
Why did nobody care about the state Inglorium was in, or that the Gods have disappeared? That bothered me so so so soooo much during the first two episodes; nobody non-Eliatrope or non-demigod cared that their God/Goddess was... well... gone. Aside from God Iop, where are they?? Hated the disinterest, hated the silence around it. Guess that's a mystery that will be unraveled in some other media.
Yugo grew tall and handsome and I'm not afraid to say it. Happy for him, though him suddenly growing so quickly was a bit silly. I figured there would be a time skip to justify his 'growth' that we saw in promotional images and teasers. Won't complain though, he deserved to finally be in a body that reflects his actual age, it took him long enough!
"Bootleg Alys" from the Dofus movie made a cameo in episode 11 which made me snerk. (I noticed a few more background characters from the movie that were re-used in episode 11.)
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And that's all I have to say, at least here on Tumblr. It was quite a ride.
A big thanks Ankama and all the Kickbackers that made it possible; this show had its ups and downs over the past decade but it was enjoyable and loved. It still holds a special place in my heart and I will keep a tiny eye out for more Krozmos stuff in the future (like Welsh & Shedar, gimme!!).
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samd1o1 · 10 months
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Crowley's BPD Traits And Why They Are Important;
We all know our beloved ineffable husbands are neurodivergent icons. Despite not being human they both act like neurodivergent humans would (and do).
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Today I thought we would take a look specifically at Crowley and his BPD traits and what they mean.
(Also before we start; a trigger warning for talks and mentions of suicide, depression, mood swings, drinking, and trauma).
First what is BPD? BPD stands for Borderline Personality Disorder.
"A mental disorder characterized by unstable moods, behavior, and relationships." -Mayo Clinic
BPD is a disorder caused by trauma. Trauma is of course different for every individual. So while some demons may seem perfectly content with the fall from Heaven, others may have been significantly traumatized. And I believe this is where Crowley falls (pun very intended).
So we covered how Crowley could have developed BPD, but let's talk about their traits.
The DSM-5 lists 9 Criteria for BPD, of which at least 5 are required for diagnosis. We will be covering each one and how (or how they don't) apply to Crowley.
1. Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment:
As we know BPD is caused by trauma, but more specifically it can be trauma that deals with abandonment. Say God casting you down to Hell for simply asking questions?
This can lead to the person with BPD going through frantic efforts to avoid abandonment happening ever again.
We can see this most in Crowley when she argues with Aziraphale. Can you count how many times Crowley tries to run away with Aziraphale so that he doesn't leave him during an argument? It's three. They have done this three times (and that's just the on screen ones, who knows whats happened in 6,000 years!).
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2. A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation.
Now this one is harder to see in Crowley because this trait of BPD (and many others) comes out most in romantic partners. And Crowley has only ever had one apple in his eye, Aziraphale. But even just with their relationship with Aziraphale we can see this.
While Crowley never directs his anger at Aziraphale we can definitely see how much the angel affects him. Their arguments that can lead to them not talking for decades, Crowley literally exploding with lighting because of his anger.
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An example I find most interesting is Crowley's entire perception of Aziraphale changing when he sees Aziraphale let the people in the flood die. And this perception is only fixed in the Job minisode when Aziraphale does the right thing again. All it takes is one incident for Crowley to change her mind.
3. Identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self.
I think this is most obvious in the opening to season 2 where Crowley is questioning the meaning of life and more importantly his role as a demon.
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But this isn't the only demon related identity disturbance Crowley faces. A common identity disturbance for those with BPD is believing that they are evil. This is caused by trauma but is also not helped by the stigma Cluster B disorders face.
Crowley believes he must be evil because he is a demon. He lies because he is a demon. Just like someone with BPD may believe they are evil for their disorder or are manipulative because of it. But in reality that may not be the whole truth. You can still be a good person despite being a demon, despite having a disorder.
4. Impulsivity in at least 2 areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g., spending, sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating).
Do... Do I need to explain this one?
Crowley is an alcoholic. He casually drinks but will also drink anytime a slight inconvenience pops up.
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Crowley is also known for going "too fast". He is almost always speeding in the Bentley.
5. Recurrent suicidal behaviour, gestures or threats, or self-mutilating behaviour.
This is one of the ones that is harder to apply to Crowley simply because she is a demon, not a human. It is much harder for him to kill himself. And while this trait must be recurrent I still think it's important to bring up the Holy Water incident.
Crowley tells Aziraphale the holy water is just for insurance, but Aziraphale knows Crowley better than that and was right to assume it could probably be for a suicide pill. (Even if it did come in handy as insurance later). But the fact Aziraphale assumes that I believe is telling.
6. Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days).
We see a few different times where Crowley's mood shifts into extremes.
We already discussed the lighting incident. I think another big show of their anger is how he treats his plants in season 1. While yes it is them recreating their trauma with God (Metatron?) and being thrown out of Heaven, that anger comes from somewhere.
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Jim short for James, long for Gabriel also sparks this anger in Crowley to the point of threatening his life and telling him to jump out of a window.
Crowley's depression is seen on the biggest spotlight when talking about the fall. Their sentiments about not meaning to fall, that she only ever asked questions.
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7. Chronic feelings of emptiness.
Unfortunately I can't speak on this one purely because I do not live in Crowley's head. I do not recall it ever being something mentioned or showed. That doesn't mean it can't happen to her of course, but let's stick with the facts.
8. Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g., frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights).
As you can see BPD deals with anger a lot. so I will once again bring up some points we've already made. With the lighting incident, and good old Jimmy-boy.
I also just wanted to mention we know Crowley appears a bit angry at most times as well as Muriel describes him as "the grumpy one". Just thought it was a fun, helpful detail.
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9. Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms.
This one is also a bit hard because again I am not in Crowley's head but also she does in fact have plenty to worry about that is real.
But Crowley does still show paranoid ideation. His distrust of others, disorganized thoughts (talking about ducks and the end of the world at the same time), feeling threatened, thinking he's being spied on (the ducks have ears).
Lots of ducks.
Now some may think diagnosing/headcanoning a character with specific mental illnesses is silly, and maybe it is! But I still believe it's important. Why?
Well for starters; representation is always important. Seeing someone similar to you on screen you can relate to and find joy and comfort in. Or maybe they're just raising awareness. Or just showing that hey, these people exist.
But I also wanted to touch on the stigma of BPD and other Cluster B disorders.
I touched on it briefly in an earlier point but BPD is heavily stigmatized. Many people treat the disorder as evil and manipulative. That the people with it don't deserve love or kindness. Which is of course simply not true.
Most of the characters coded with BPD today are antagonists and/or villains. Think Jinx from Arcane or Spinel from Steven Universe. These characters are amazingly written and performed and I do love them dearly. And there is nothing wrong with them, but it is nice to even the playing field. To have a character with traits of BPD who is fundamentally good and does the right thing. They are a protagonist of their story and even a hero!
And that is why I think Crowley is good representation of BPD (even if it was not intended that way).
And here's hoping to season 3 so our demon (and angel) get a happy ending!
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collapsedglasshouses · 5 months
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An Angel For Noah || Noah Sebastian x OC [Part 10]
DIVIDER ART WORK BY @cafekitsune
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PAIRING: Noah Sebastian x Jules [she/her]
MASTERPOST
SUMMARY: Jules and Noah finally face their difficulies, leading to them letting down their guards.
WARNINGS: ANGST, NSFW, MDNI, fingering, unprotected sex (p in v) [does it even count as unprotected, she is a fucking guardian angel idk], even more angst, swearing, mentions of mental health issues, mentions of death, ...
A/N: I cried. A lot. :) Also! I'd like to dedicate this chapter to @crimson-calligraphyx because I accidentally gave Jules' best friend her name in the exact same spelling as her own name! ALSO... this is not proofread... i'm sorry about that ._.
TAGLIST: @trvshdxddy @blackveilomens @crimson-calligraphyx @measuredingold @cncohshit @signs-of-ill-portent @hi-fancy-seeing-you-here @ada-clarence @wild-child-7747 @thebadchic @thescarlettvvitch @cookiesupplier
Keep in mind, this takes place in an alternative universe. Even though I write about real people, the way I write them has nothing to do with how they are in real life.
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“What am I doing?” Jules asked herself while looking at Noah’s sleeping figure. It’s been three hours since he had finally fallen asleep and Jules felt numb. Her heartbeat took some time to slow down a bit, but her mind was still racing as fast as it gets. She couldn’t get the image of him trying to climb over the balcony railing out of her head. She knew he wasn’t doing well but she didn’t realize it had been that bad. He needed help she couldn’t give him.
Every time she considered a strategy to help him, she couldn't follow through with it. The idea of merely returning to exist in his shadows appeared more impossible than ever. All of her past actions seemed like a lot of bad decisions. The fact that she now also had promised him to talk about the situation and see him again, made her feel even more at unease.
Her gaze remained fixed on Noah, and she felt a wave of nausea. It seemed impossible to get herself out of the situation. She didn’t want to leave him; he needed support, and she was determined to find a way to help him overcome his misery.
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TWO WEEKS LATER
When Noah opened the door to his room, a deep sigh escaped him. The bags under his eyes were more pronounced than usual, and he found himself in a state of uncertainty. It had been a while since he last saw Jules. She didn't come to talk to him as she had promised, and although he yearned to resolve things, he understood it might be for the best.
He had phoned his therapist as soon as he woke up and made an appointment for after the tour. After that he went on and did his best. He performed as good as he could and even though the tour had been successful he was more than glad that it had ended.
His therapy session had just ended and now he didn't really know what to do. He was angry with himself that he let his intrusive thoughts get a hold of him back than but when he was being honest with himself he was even more disappointed that Jules didn't show up as she promised.
When he sat down at his desk, his phone suddenly vibrated.
ONE NEW NOTIFICATION FROM SADIE
He hadn't heard from her since that night he almost had a car accident while driving to her.
Sadie: What's up? You wanna meet up?
Noah stared at the message and began to bite the inside of his cheek. It wasn't like he didn't like her or something but since he met Jules, he hadn't thought of Sadie even once.
He sighed before laying down his phone again. This was dumb. He was acting dumb. He had this really nice girl waiting for him and he would have the advantage of getting rid of some stress, but he preferred to sit there and mourn his damn guardian angel. He wasn't even remotely sure what he was hoping to get out of it.
So, he stood up and grabbed his jacket and right as he was about to leave his room, he felt a hand on his shoulder and simultaneously his anger level seemed to explode.
"You can't be serious?" He blurted out and spun around to look at Jules. She looked terrible, if he could even say that. If she would still have been alive, he would have said she hadn't slept in a while.
"Noah-..." - "No! No fucking 'Noah'." - "I-..." - "Shut up, you didn't talk then and now I don't want to hear your excuses!"
He tried to turn around but Jules grabbed both of his shoulders to make him look at her. "You know damn well how difficult this whole thing is" Jules exclaimed and tried to suppress her tears.
"No, Jules. It isn't really difficult to just show up and talk." He answered her, ignoring his desire to touch her.
"You seem to forget who the fuck I am, Noah! I'm not even supposed to be here." She snarled at him.
"Then go." Noah answered coldly before getting out of her grip and storming of. He didn't even stop when he passed Nick who gave him a confused look.
He didn't allow him to think anything until he drove out of the drive way. Screams from the music echoed through his car as he gribbed the steering wheel harder. He couldn't believe this whole fucked up shit was happening as if he didn't already have enough to deal with.
When he left the neighborhood, he suddenly felt at unease and could just roll his eyes. "This isn't working, Jules. I'll still leave."
Nobody answered him. He was furious.
His knuckles slowly began to turn white from his hard grip on the steering wheel as he suddenly let out a frustrated groan and turned around as soon as he saw the last gas station before he would reach Sadie's house.
“Fuck off.” Noah shouted into the darkness. He couldn’t believe how much Jules had him in his grip. The last couple of days he tried his utter best to clear his head, get things sorted out, work on the problems that already consumed his mind, but Jules was the one thing that never left him. He couldn’t escape her, and he hated her for that.
“You need to stop, Jules.” He screamed and still, there was no answer. So, when he re-entered the house and stormed to his room, he was about to trash his room when he saw Jules sitting on his bed, staring at the wall.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” He screamed at her, causing her to flinch.
“What are you talking about?” She wanted to know, not even caring to look up at his angered face. She really didn’t know what he was talking about.
“Oh, come on, Jules.” He answered her and started pacing up and down the room. He needed to let go. He needed to get rid of his piled-up frustration.
She slowly stood up from his bed, her eyes following his wandering figure. She didn’t know what to say. She didn’t even know what he wanted. But she knew her following spiteful comment didn’t ease the tension. “Enjoyed your trip?”
Noah stopped in his tracks. “You can’t be fucking serious, Jules.” – “Care to explain your psychotic outburst?”
When Noah looked at Jules like that, he didn't realize how exhausted she appeared.
Instead of answered her, he began to shake his head unamused. “You know exactly what you did.” – “You’re insane.” – “OF FUCKING COURSE… I’m talking to my fucking guardian angel who seems to have a great jealousy issue.”
Jules' brow furrowed as she processed what Noah had just yelled at her. His eyes sparkled with a slight hint of madness. A couple of seconds passed, before Jules finally realized what Noah was trying to tell her.
“You think I made you turn around from your booty call?” Jules wanted to know from him.
“I don’t think it, I know it and I need to know why.” Noah answered her and crossed his arms in front of his chest.
Jules blinked a couple of seconds and felt a wave of relieve wash over her. “I hate to break it to you, Noah… But I wasn’t even following you.”
Jules looked into Noah’s eyes and saw how confusion washed over him. He wasn’t sure what he should believe anymore. He let out a frustrated sigh before he sat down at the edge of his bed, Jules eyes following him with concern.
"Why didn't you talk to me like you promised?" He asked her after a couple of minutes of silence, his eyes finally meeting hers.
Jules' heart sank at his broken frame. She didn't know what to say. She knew she had been a coward but she just wanted him to forget about her.
"This is all so confusing, Noah. I feel like we always run in circles." She breathed out and sat down next to him. "I think it would be best for me to just go back into your shadows, Noah. I'm making your live even harder than it already is."
Noah, deciding to ignore her statement, turned his upper body to her, "You need to tell me something, Jules."
She looked into his dark brown eyes which sparked with curiosity. Every time she dared to glance at him like that, she felt like she was going to crumble under his gaze. "What is it, Noah?" Her voice was not more than a whisper, both of them scared to ruin the moment like they did so often in the past.
"Did you feel it, too?" He calmly wanted to know and Jules heart rate increased rapidly. He didn’t even have to explain what he exactly meant.
If she felt it too? Of course, she did. Of course, she felt how their hearts aligned the first time their eyes met. Of course, she felt how she wanted nothing but to be close to him. Of course, she felt it too.
But Jules also knew she couldn’t just say that.
Noah's eyes never left hers. He wouldn’t let this go again. He needed to know if he really was going crazy. He noticed how Jules began to pick the skin around her finger nails and decided to step in. He carefully grabbed her hands. Again, there was this wave washing over him, every time he got to touch her.
And of course, she felt it too. But she didn’t know what to do. She knew, if she would talk, there was no way out of this anymore. Even less than before.
Noah, in the mean time, realized what her answer would be, giving her shift in demeanor. But he needed to hear it from her.
"Don’t make this harder than it already is, Noah." Jules whispered, both of them still getting lost in each other’s eyes.
"So, you felt it too." Noah exclaimed, not letting go of the subject.
Jules swallowed hard. She wanted to be strong. She wanted to let Noah go, but when he looked at her like that, their hands still intertwined, she felt like she was about to explode.
"Say it, Jules." Noah demanded, "Say it and I’ll let you go."
Jules' ears were ringing. Her cheeks were burning and the slight tint of Noah’s cheeks gave away, he was feeling the exact same thing.
"You promise?"
Noah nodded.
"I thought, I lost you." Jules than let out, causing Noah to raise his brows while Jules felt her tears coming up. "I-… I thought, you would do it, Noah. I had this gut-wrecking feeling that you would die…"
Noah swallowed hard.
"If that was the feeling Keaton felt when I was hit by that car… I-… I don’t wanna feel that every again… It felt like I was dying again." She explained while tears fell down her cheeks. Noah wanted to wipe them away but he decided against it, fearing he would lose her again.
Jules squeezed his hands harder.
"When I saw you making an appointment with your therapist and doing rather well after I left that night… I just didn’t want to disturb you again." Jules explained, only interrupted by her own cries.
Noah's heart sank. He knew he wasn’t doing well and he did everything he could to change that again but seeing her so broken because of his action made it even worse for him. The last thing he wanted was to hurt her and yet it seemed it was the only thing that brought them together. Hurting each other…
"I'm supposed to help you when you are in trouble. Prevent you from bad things but I feel like I’m the trigger to get you to do bad things and that’s just because I was so dumb to show myself." She rambled on, feeling a sense of relief from finally letting go of her thoughts. Noah's eyes became watery.
"But the biggest mistake was to let you touch me, Noah, because-…" Jules stopped mid-sentence, in hopes she could calm herself down, but nothing helped. The tears were flowing like there was no tomorrow.
"Tell me, Jules." Noah asked with a raspy voice from trying to hold his tears back.
"Because we both know this was the moment there was no going back." Jules whispered and sniffled quietly. Her gaze fell down to their hands, both of them holding each other with such force, as if one of them would explode into the nothingness.
Noah slowly let go of one of her hands and pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. Than he placed his hand under her chin to make her look at him. This was enough for Jules.
Everything she desperately wanted to keep from him broke out of her.
"I don’t even know if these feelings are real…" Jules let out and stopped in her tracks again. Noah gave her an encouraging look to go on.
"I feel so alive with you… You make me feel alive, Noah." She whispered and stared into his brown eyes.
For a couple of seconds, they just looked at each other, both processing what Jules had just said. And than… Noah broke.
"You're someone worth staying alive for, Jules."
Jules blinked for a second, trying to fight the urge of getting closer to Noah, but Noah took the decision from her when he mumbled "Fuck it..." and not even a second later grabbed Jules face and let their lips connect.
As their lips met, the scent of his cologne enveloped Jules, making her head spin with desire. Noah felt exactly the same. The warmth of her kiss spread through him like a comforting blanket on a chilly night.
For a second, both of them forgot how fucked up their situation was. They just pretended they were two adults, connect by fate. It was a bittersweet exchange, a mixture of longing and fulfillment that lingered in the air.
Their bodies gravitated toward each other, closing the distance as if pulled by an invisible force. Soon, Jules was being pulled onto Noah's lap and let her arms fall around his neck, while he grabbing onto her waist as if she would vanish any second.
Nothing even compared to the sensation Jules felt in that moment. Noah was the only thing on her mind and nothing was going to stop that. It felt like she only existed for this exact moment. To be close to him, to be held by him. All of his was new for her but she felt this deep need to get even closer to him.
For Noah, it felt like he had eaten the forbidden fruit. He had been in situations like this before but nothing in the world was able to compete with the feelings that washed over him, while his lips collided with Jules'.
When they finally pulled away, the air between them crackled with a newfound energy, the unspoken promise of what was to come. Their eyes met, a silent conversation passing between them, unlocking emotions that had long been hidden.
Jules' lips were red and puffy, while Noah's hair was even wilder then it had been just a couple of minutes ago.
Moments of silence passed between them, both getting lost in each others eyes.
Right as Noah was about to break this silence, Jules became bold. She closed their distance again, not being able to stand even a slight loss of contact with Noah. She felt her heart beating so fast that she was convinced for a second that she was in fact still alive.
She tried to push her thoughts of the future away as Noah's hands slipped under the plain shirt she wore. Jules shivered under his touch.
Even though Jules had no idea what she was doing, she let her feelings get a hold of her and began kissing down Noah's tattooed neck. She felt like she was going to explode when she heard his heavy breaths. Her hand grabbed the base of his hair without a second thought when Noah suddenly thrusted his hips up.
Jules moaned out in a mix of confusion and arousal. She couldn't believe this was really happening. She never made anyone feel the way Noah felt right now.
Noah pushed her slightly against him when she lifted her head again to look into his love drunk eyes.
"Are you okay?" Noah mumbled out, waiting for Jules' consent to the situation.
Jules looked at him for a short second before nodding frantically. She needed more. She needed Noah.
When she tried to kiss him again, he slightly backed away, a smirk on his face. "Use your words, Jules."
"I'm-..." Jules struggled to get out, "I'm more than okay, Noah."
Their lips connected again in a heated kiss and seemingly everything went fast, just like their whole relationship.
They helped each other out of their shirts, before Noah turned them around, hovering over the angel in front of him. He tried not to think about the fact that he was in fact making out with a somewhat ghost.
Jules was real to him. Jules was everything he needed right now.
He planted some soft kisses on her skin and felt how his lips began to prickle. This felt so unreal to him.
"You look so fucking beautiful." He breathed out while letting his hands run over her upper body. Jules felt goose bumps forming all over her skin. She couldn't quite comprehend how she was the angel in their position when every single touch of his felt so godlike.
“I-… I feel like I need more.” Jules said quietly even though it came out more like a desperate plea.
Noah’s hand traveled up to her breast slowly, pinching her hardened nipple for a short second. He didn’t miss how Jules thrusted herself against his thigh for a short second.
“Does it feel good?” Noah breathed out with a faint smile on his face before kissing Jules’ cheek.
Even though Jules had little to no experience, she noticed how he tried to tease her, but she wasn’t able to mock him back. She needed him so bad.
Jules whined out Noah’s name. “It feels so good.”
Noah kissed her deeply, quickly involving his tongue to get a taste of her. Jules couldn’t help but moan into his kiss loudly. Noah loved it, getting addicted to every precious noise he brought out of Jules. Just when Noah brought his knee between her legs, Jules swore she was about to die again. She couldn’t believe this whole thing was even better than she read in her little novels back when she was living in her small flat. Although their kisses slowed down a bit, their actions didn’t.
Jules shyly let her hand travel down Noah’s body, finding its way on his hardness. Noah felt like he was going to explode.
“God. Where did you learn that?” He moaned out in surprise, still not quite processing what was happening while Jules’ moves let him sink deeper into his delusion.
“You know? Reading books can help.” Jules smiled into the kiss, noticing how she got even wetter at his exclaim.
Her hand gripped him harder.
Noah let out a deep moan as he kissed down her neck and moved the hand that was previously placed on her breast down her stomach. Shortly they found their place on her clothed core. It didn’t take him long to push through the waistband of her shorts and she started to lightly massage her clit.
“Holy.” She moaned into his mouth while arching her back.
“You’re going to be the death of me.” Noah whined out, causing Jules to giggle.
“And here I thought I was a reason to stay alive for.” She whispered out with a smile, causing Noah to tease her wet entrance with his fingers before going back to her clit again. Noah smiled at her aroused expression.
“You’re going to be the death of my piece and mind.” He corrected himself, before Jules let go of his hardness to help him get her out of her last pieces of clothing.
Looking at his angel in all her glory was mind blowing to Noah. He was sure he felt his cock twitch in excitement when he looked at her beauty. It felt like she was glowing, and Noah just craved her taste even more.
But he wanted to take it slow. He didn’t know if this was the last time. He didn’t know if they were going back to their weird state of knowing about each other but ignoring their connection at the same time. He would do everything in his power to burn these images in both of their heads.
He circled her clit faster and faster as he leaned forward to kiss Jules deeply. He swallowed every moan of her as he felt himself get more and more aroused.
Then, for a moment, he stopped and looked the girl under him in the eyes, asking for silent consent. Jules slightly nodded; her mind clouded with the man in front of her.
“Please.” Jules groaned as she felt his fingers sink into her deeper and deeper.
“You’re so tight, I can barely fit my fingers in.” Noah teased the girl as he, again, kissed her neck.
Jules gripped Noah’s hair tightly as she pushed herself down on his hand. It was a brand-new sensation for her. It wasn’t like she hadn’t touched herself during her lifetime, but feeling Noah’s fingers inside of her felt like she was meant to be his.
Noah quickened his pace, while his other hand found it’s way to her cheek, caressing it with softness. Her moans echoed through the room, and he wanted nothing more but to record them and play them over and over as if it was his favorite song.
Jules leaned forward to catch Noah’s lips again. Jules didn’t know what had come over her but everything just felt so good and right.
“Fuck, you are perfect.” Noah muttered into the kiss. “Please… Please come for me. You can do it.”
And Jules did. The words and moans that come out of her mouth nearly made Noah come on the spot. She barely had the strength anymore to tell him how good he made her feel while she began shaking in pleasure. All she could do was running her fingernails over his bare back.
For a couple of seconds, Jules just whimpered in ecstasy.
“Your voice is my favorite sound.” Noah whispered and peppered kisses on her cheek as she came down from her high.
All Jules could do was capture Noah’s lips in another kiss, showing her gratefulness to share this moment with him. The kiss became deeper as she wrapped her arms around him, catching him in a firm embrace. She couldn’t let go of him.
Noah let it happen. He also slung his arms around her as if life depended on it. But hugging each other seemingly didn’t do enough anymore.
“Again…” Jules mumbled into his shoulder, causing Noah to widen his eyes. “I need you.”
“Shit… You really want to?” Noah asked, making sure he wasn’t dreaming right now. He lifted his body up slightly, to look her in the eyes.
“I need to feel you, Noah.” Jules whined and left the man over her speechless.
Fuck.
Noah needed to calm himself down. He was already so close to letting go of himself, when he simple looked at his angel. Even now, with the remains of their shared moment hanging in the air, he wondered how it would feel to be inside of her. That’s when he allowed himself to think about the fact that Jules was in fact not a person wandering this earth. He was kind of sleeping with a ghost… Or going insane… Probably both.
“We don’t need t-…” – “I want to, Noah.”
Noah let out a deep breath, nearly unable to ignore his own lust. Jules noticed the conflict going on in his head and quickly came to his rescue. She captured him in a sweet and soft kiss.
“I promise. I want this.” She muttered against his lips. “I want to be close to you. Do you want to?”
Noah nearly crumbled because of her words. Of course, he wanted her. So badly.
Noah swallowed hardly before deciding to let go. He quickly got out of his clothes, giving Jules almost no time to look at his beauty, before coming back to her, kissing her with such force, she nearly moaned again.
He placed himself between her open legs, thrusting his hardness against her pussy a few times, while analyzing her reaction with great interest. Jules took in every second she had with Noah. She was willing to do nothing else for the rest of her weird existence.
If Jules hadn’t already corrupted every little space of Noah’s thoughts, she would have done it now. Everything he could feel, taste, sense… It was Jules. Everything was Jules.
Jules shyly reached down to grab his erection and ran her hands up and down for a couple of times. Noah meanwhile began to shake under her touch. “It feels so good.”
His words hypnotized Jules as she circled her hand over his tip and stroked it a few more times. She would have never thought everything would lead to this moment. Jules felt her heat throb before moving her hips slightly upwards to guide his hardness into her.
Just the tip sinking into her, made both of them moan out. For a moment, Noah stayed still as he watched the woman move her hips even more to give him better entrance. Inch by inch, his cock sank into her, their breaths and whines echoing through the room as he stretched her out.
Noah begged this wasn’t just a dream. It felt more real than anything ever before.
“You’re taking me so well, angel.” He breathed out before placing a small kiss on her lips.
“You feel so good.” Jules answered him and looked into his eyes lovingly.
With that he finally thrusted into her. Everything aligned in that moment. All the moments they shared, all the fights, all the difficulties, all the feelings. Everything felt like it happened to bring them to this moment. It was as if they were the only to individuals existing in that moment. Sweet words were whispered into the heavy air of the room as the both of them gave each other exactly what they craved. Each other.
“Keep going. Noah. You feel so good.” Jules whisper shouted.
“God…” Noah moaned. “I love this so much.”
His pace became faster.
Without even thinking, Jules let out her next words. “I wanna feel your cum.”
Noah’s whole body prickled at her words. He couldn’t form words anymore, everything was hazed with the emotions he felt for her. He loved her. He loved being with her. He craved her.
Jules moved to meet his thrusts. Noah bit his lip. “You’re taking me so well.”
Jules kissed him again, feeling like she had never felt more emotions at the same time in her life.
“That’s it. Let go, Jules.” Noah grunted, making sure to give Jules her time. He was hitting all the perfect spots.
His thrusts became harder, while he captured her hands above her head, getting even better excess. They moaned in sync. It was their final straw.
They both came with a loud moan, his cum spilling inside of her with each thrust. For a few moments, their heavy breaths were the only thing that filled the room. Both coming down from their highs with a few kisses, all filled with the silent confessions of love.
When Noah caught his breath again, he kissed Jules again. “You are so fucking beautiful.”
“So are you.” Jules answered him with a sweet smile while she gazed over his face. He was in fact so beautiful. From his dark brown eyes that held so many secrets, to the small freckles plastered over his face.
Slowly, Noah let himself fall into his bed, cuddling into her side immediately.
Jules, meanwhile, stared at the ceiling of Noah’s room, while her thoughts began to flow her brain. This actually happened. She, an individual dangling between life and death, had sex with the person she was supposed to guard. But he wasn’t just any person. He was Noah. Her Noah.
It took the two a couple of minutes, maybe an hour to finally speak up again.
“You don’t even know how much you mean to me.” Noah whispered out and brushed a strand of her out of her face. His anxiety had also caught up to him, but he tried to ignore it for a second longer while laying there.
Jules bit her lip. Her heart skipped a beat at his words, even though she tried to function normally again. “I can’t even describe what you mean to me.”
She turned to look into his eyes. She quickly noticed they both knew what was eventually going to happen now.
“One night.” Noah whispered in a pleading tone. “One night, where we don’t think about it.”
Jules swallowed hard. She knew it was going to end rather soon than late. She didn’t want it to but she knew it had to go this way. So, she nodded.
“One night.”
With that she leaned forward and kissed him again. She kissed him with such force, he wouldn’t have any chance to miss what she was trying to say.
After that, they got even closer to each other, letting each other embrace the love they shared for a moment…
One night…
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PART ELEVEN
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