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#-lose friends and mutuals
starheirxero · 3 months
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btw for the record if we have ever been in a situation where we had to stop being friends for whatever reason, i will still always hold you fondly in my heart. i will still think of every kind and small moment we had and i will miss you with every atom in my body. i will wait for you to come back and if you return, you will be no less of a friend to me than the day you left. i have no friendship decay
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oars · 7 months
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hairmetal666 · 11 months
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Never in a million years did Steve Harrington think he'd be standing in the drama club room in front of Eddie the Freak--who's sitting on a goddamn throne with his full lips pulled into a smug grin--asking to be taught how to play Dorks and Goblins. Yet, here he is, face a burning shade of crimson, as he explains for the sixth time what, exactly, he needs.
"Munson, it's not that hard. Henderson wants me to play in the--the game thingy they're doing when Will is home for a visit."
"Yeah, Harrington, and I stop listening every time you call it a game thingy. You obviously don't care about this at all, so why should I waste my time helping you?"
Steve rolls his eyes. "What if I pay you?"
Munson's face goes through a complicated series of changes before falling into a neutral mask, no smirk or teasing smile to be found. "You'll pay me to teach you dnd? Are you fucking kidding?"
"No?' Steve draws a hand through his hair, watches as Munson's dark eyes track the movement. "I thought you might help me out cause those kids never shut-up about you, but I'm willing to put money on it."
"Huh," Eddie says. He steeples his fingers under his chin. "Maybe I misjudged you, Harrington."
Steve lets himself smile at this. "I don't think you did. I don't give a shit about this game."
"Didn't take you for one to have a bunch of nerdy child friends."
"I'm their babysitter," he says, realizes immediately it was a mistake.
Eddie cackles until it turns into a full-bodied laugh, tears leaking from the corners of his eyes. "You are something else, Harrington," he manages.
For his part, Steve hopes Munson hasn't noticed how bright red his face is. "Does that mean you'll help me?"
"I guess," he rolls his eyes. "But if you're just screwing around, I'm out."
"No, yeah, totally," Steve nods too hard, sends his hair cascading into his face. "Sounds good. How much?"
"Huh?" Eddie tilts his face up, giving Steve a perfect view of the smattering of faint freckles across the bridge of his nose.
"I said I'd pay you. What's the going rate for dnd lessons?"
"Oh, nah, free of charge, Harrington. Henderson would eat me alive if he knew I made you pay."
The smile they share is soft, tentative, and Steve doesn't notice the swathes of pink decorating Eddie's pale cheekbones.
---
They meet up in the drama room after the last bell. Eddie is waiting on the throne with his feet propped on the table, sipping a Mt. Dew. His eyes widen when Steve walks into the room.
"You're on time," he says.
Steve scoffs. "Why wouldn't I be?"
Eddie shrugs, sets his feet on the floor. "Just wasn't aware that the King put a lot of stock in punctuality."
"C'mon, man, I'm trying not to be that guy, and I'm definitely not king of anything. Unless maybe it's Family Video, but even then, that's Robin."
"You're kind of weird, Harrington, you know that?" Eddie's dimples bracket his smile. The sight does weird things in Steve's chest.
"I've been told, yeah." Steve smiles back. "Where do we start?"
They start with dice, with a character sheet.
"Chaotic-good human Paladin?" Eddie asks.
He shrugs. "That's what Dustin keeps screaming at me. I got no idea what any of it means."
"That's not entirely true," Eddie says. "You've kept up with me so far."
"Yeah, that's you. Dustin rambles and then accuses me of not listening when it's over my head. When he goes on long enough, I start to get a headache right here," Steve rubs the spot between his eyes.
"That kid," Eddie says with the right combination of affection and frustration. "I don't know, you seem to have picked up on some of the stuff he said. You have a solid idea on gameplay, at least. I'd say you're doing pretty good."
"Thanks," Steve laughs. "No migraine yet, so that's a point in your favor."
"Migraines?"
"Head trauma."
"Byers?"
"And Hargrove."
"That was Hargrove?" Eddie asks.
"Hit me in the head with a plate."
"What the fuck."
"He was pissed that Max was friends with Lucas. He came after them. I couldn't just let him--I think he would've killed Lucas."
Eddie nods, hands fiddling with a die. "No wonder those kids love you," he says.
"We've been through some shit together."
"Guess it makes more sense why you wanted to learn dnd."
"As much as it pains me to admit," Steve rolls his eyes. "I love to make those little shitheads happy."
"Well, based on the way they talk about you, you succeed."
"You too, you know?" Steve offers. "All I've heard about the last three months is 'Eddie's so cool,' 'Hellfire's so fun.'"
"Jealous?" Eddie laughs.
"Completely," Steve admits.
"Don't worry, Harrington, I'll make a nerd out of you yet."
---
They meetup after school every day they can over the next two weeks. At first, Steve is surprised that he doesn't really mind spending so much time with Munson, that he actually, kind of, has fun. And the more time they spend together, the more Eddie infiltrates his space. Leans into Steve's side as they sit next to each other, brushes their hands together, hovers over his shoulder, faces nearly touching, as he checks stuff on Steve's character sheet.
It makes Steve feel--well, it makes him think of what it would be like to run his fingers through the soft gloss of Eddie's curls; wonders what that plump mouth would be like pressed against his own; can't stop thinking about if Eddie is as vocal in bed as he is everywhere else. He knows he also likes guys, has for a while, but he's never in his life wanted someone this viscerally; so much he can feel the ache of it in his teeth.
It's the last day before the campaign for Will, and Steve is fucking sad. He thinks maybe Eddie is too. He's at least quieter than normal, explanations not at their usual fever pitch. An hour before they usually call it quits, he claps his hands together (too gently, too unlike himself), says, "That's it, Harrington. You're not going to be more ready than this."
"Right," Steve says. Can't help his eyes from darting over Eddie's face, aching to know what he's thinking. "You'll be there tomorrow?"
Eddie bends his head over his notebooks. "Nah, I don't need to intrude."
"But--"
"It's okay, Stevie. I get that it's family only." He looks like he really means it, but his eyes are sad, don't shine like they should.
Steve doesn't know what to say to that, just nods, and then there's nothing else. They stare at each other for a few very long, quiet seconds, before Eddie says, "I'll see you around, Harrington."
"Right, yeah. You too." And he walks out of the drama room with the heaviest heart he thinks he's ever had.
---
Steve thinks he won't miss Eddie. That if he doesn't dwell on those hours spent with Eddie, learning dnd, that the missing will go away.
It doesn't.
Which is how he finds himself back at the high school on Wednesday, standing in front of the drama room door, willing himself to go inside. Eddie's on the throne, the typical notebooks and binders and Mt. Dew cans clustered around him, but he's not engrossed in imagining up a new campaign for Hellfire. No, his head is in his hands, knees drawn up to his chest.
"Eddie?" Steve asks.
His head pops up, and even in the low light, Steve notices the silvery tracks of tears down his cheeks.
"Steve! What are you--" he hastily wipes at his face with his shirt sleeve. "What are you doing here?"
Steve's acting only on instinct, crossing the room and dropping to his knees, taking Eddie's jaw between his palms, thumbing away the wetness on his cheeks.
"Did someone hurt you?" he asks.
Eddie's laugh is wet. "Nah, Harrington. I only have myself to blame for this one."
"Can I do anything?"
"Are you trying to kill me?"
"Sorry?"
"You, Steve Harrington, kind and compassionate? Learn dnd to make your little nerd friends happy? Who are you?"
"I'm just me, man," Steve blushes. "But, uh, I came to thank you." He's still holding Eddie's face in his hands, can't help but notice the way he flushes, how his dark eyes dart away from Steve's.
"I really liked hanging out with you," Steve says. This close to Eddie, his mind doesn't quite feel like his own. All he can think of is big eyes, soft curls, full lips.
"Yo--you did?"
"So much," Steve whispers. He doesn't quite remember moving, but now their foreheads are pressed together, warm breath mingling, lips almost, almost touching.
"I liked it too," Eddie breathes. After a few seconds, he laughs. "Knew I'd make a nerd out of you, Harrington."
"Shut-up," Steve laughs.
"Make me," Eddie says, and it's just that easy. Steve crosses the space still separating them, presses his mouth against Eddie's.
The kiss is slow, exploratory, the gentle discovery of how they fit together, the promise of all the things they can do in the future, all the pleasure they can bring.
"I'm not a nerd," Steve says when they part.
"No, you're right. You're like a nerd by marriage. Nerd-in-law," Eddie giggles. His eyes are bright, face pink, the most beautiful thing Steve has ever seen.
"Shut-up," Steve giggles right back.
Eddie raises an eyebrow, the dare obvious, and Steve doesn't hesitate to kiss him again.
"You wanna get out of here?" Steve asks when they part, significantly more breathless, jeans significantly tighter, than when he arrived.
"You're gonna have to role persuasion for that, Stevie," Eddie smirks.
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fanby-fckry · 17 days
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@vestadragon totally called me out in the tags when I reblogged this for incorrect quotes inspo.
You were right! Not only was I thinking about Alastor, I was thinking about RadioApple, because I’m RadioApple trash down to the core.
Can you blame me, though? I mean, come on…
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His shitty attitude and grabbable waist have bewitched me. 🥰
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coffeelovinggayidiot · 6 months
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Like all of tumblr, aparently: we 💜 love ✡️jews✡️ and we would 👊 punch nazis and we reblog five 5️⃣ different haukkah 🕎 posts a year we are like so progresive 💁✨️
Also all of tumblr, aparently: death to all jews 🚫✡️ if you're a jewish person who lives in IsNotRaEl then you're an evil 👺 bad jew and you deserve to be raped and murdered ☠️☠️ what? You fled to israel because we were murdering you by the millions??? Well you should have all died lol ☠️☠️ happy hanukkah btw 🕎
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angstydiaz · 3 months
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AGAIN swiftie mutuals dont kill me but i hate the way when anyone criticizes taylors private jet usage people jump to say "okay but all these mega corps did this but you don't say anything" and im like....??? we very much do??? that doesn't make her actions good??? l
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dead-core · 4 months
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craving validation from exactly the wrong person. slay
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useramor · 2 months
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>:/
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smol-tired-binch-blog · 7 months
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[kicks door down]
Autistic Nishiki whose special interest is fashion and not only considers what's trendy but also looks out for fabrics that aren't a sensory nightmare, however sometimes he will force himself to wear something that isn't comfy for appearance's sake, which leaves him more vulnerable to getting overwhelmed and therefore 'emotional' Also means he has his collar popped like Kiryu's for sensory reasons too and slutty reasons, which would once again make me correct in saying if he undid his collar in Kiwami he'd be normal again because if I were constantly experiencing sensory discomfort I too would be fucked up and evil.
Cause like here's the thing, autistic Kiryu and Majima headcanons are more obvious (especially the former), whereas Nishiki probably comes off as the most 'normal'; he can likely maintain eye contact and talk to people 'normally' and not like, go off on some random tangent about a special interest or hyperfixation. And then you remember masking is a thing.
And okay, so I actually think it's unfair a lot of fandom considers him a 'crybaby' right, cause he's cried in situations MOST PEOPLE WOULD RIGHTFULLY CRY OVER! BUT, I can use this to my Autistic Advantage and have this be he actually struggles to regulate his emotions, and considering he's been exposed to the yakuza world since a young age where ANY emotion that isn't 'respectable stoicism' or 'righteous fury and indignation', he's seen as even MORE overly emotional. Hence the need to start masking so early, PLUS having to protect Kiryu who couldn't mask if his life depended on it because he doesn't realise he may HAVE to (speaking from personal experience, Kiryu definitely went his whole life unaware there was anything ""wrong"" with him (for lack of a better word) and had people just like "oh yeah he's just Like That dw bout it" and went on with his life), so Nishiki takes up the mantle of I'm The One Who Knows What We're Doing Lad's desperate to gain acceptance and will change whatever he has to but people still somehow pick up that Something's Off About Him and so they tend to be disdainful or brush him off. It's easy charisma that can win over hostesses and brief encounters with civillians but can't carry across in the yakuza. Kiwami is him trying his DAMNDEST to act neurotypical even at the cost of his own comfort, and the worst part is it's not working
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cinnamon-phrog · 25 days
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Do you ever see a take in a fandom tag and you're like HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHH
#it was SO contradictory too ugh. and a mutual liked it!#you disrespect me. you disrespect my whole family#you call us 'stinky poopy babies'#you punched my wife. you kick mah baby you KICKed my FOCKin BABY#you ate our dog. YOU ATE OUR HOUSE#/ref#it's always the people i like too. everytime i want to find a d/ hmis artist or mutual BAM they're mean petty and even a nonce#and mean to peoples with hc's like mine. yes yes it happens in every fandom but not to the point where literally everybody sucks!#aside from my mutuals who are casually into the show you guys are boss <33#a d/ hmis artist will tell me they don't care/ even like my hc's and i'll feel great#a couple months later and they're talking shit about it or liking posts about why people who have said hcs are somehow predatory#as if there aren't actual predators in the tags and their little supportive minions running amuck. who draw LITERAL cp of Yellow#i'm not mad anymore i've become very numbed to this. i end up losing 'friends' to the point where i don't know how to make them anymore.#'course that doesn't mean i'll stop trying though. but give benefit of the doubt and be MASSIVELY let down.#or assume the worst. be RIGHT and yet still be somehow worse for assuming.#so i'm just gonna not interact. i'll still put my s/elfship stuff in the tags though i am above guilt or shame now. Look At My Post Boy#cuz like if all these people can get away with being petty and two faced then i can get away with smooching puppets#make Love not War
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bigsillyyy · 11 days
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If this will be my last post, wish its a fucking BANGER what loser cries cause of things yeah not me (lies)
All mutuals, i love you all !! This is the best friendships ive EVER had. I can’t believe i am friends with people like @ghosteii @ink-yy @ihearnocomplaints @crystalmagpie447 @resident-snoozer @bittersweetburnedcaramel @inspired-aspiring-artist @r0tt1ng-bunn1ez @ everyone im mutuals with (im tired)
To all people I follow, you all are SO COOL! I love seeing everything the people i follow post !
To everyone who follows me, thank you all so much. I can’t believe im so close to 100 followers? Thats fuckin insane !/pos
This is the best community i think i’ll ever be in.
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peach-pot · 1 year
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hi
@fagdykefrank @rhinco @sofflepoffle @blorb0 @fitzkn @cappybaras @kaletalecowboy @frog3798 @polygondotcomvideoproducer @shin-to-buri @vang0bus @bigwiglesbrain @tingleshroom @raidenhaze @ropucha @gender-void-partially-stars @its-a-goof-em-up @archivistea @bennerazor @kazuhahas @jestergirlbosom @starswallowingsea @dykethevvitch @pdfbabe @probsnothawkeye @herua @ibetitdoes @basketofmooneggs @jonny-b-meowborn @snufkinniee @eggsinthewind
uhm. I don’t have any propaganda I just wanted to also make a post where I tag all the tart bracket participants. hi friends ^_^ excited to play this fun little game with y’all, how are you? I haven’t spoken to some of you ever hello nice to meet you <3 I’m hannah or han or darcy (I’m a man of many names). do any of y’all like jellycat stuffed animals.
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silenthillbunni · 2 months
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._.
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httpness · 21 days
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I have realized recently that talking about my struggles to others (bonus if they are a close one) is a love language, I’m still learning how to do it properly but it’s a work in progress.
Does anyone want to be mutuals/friends to stay motivated and talk about struggles?
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cum-roll · 27 days
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hi ::) whats ur favorite word?
first ordeal, I'm studying linguistics. I know my words, you just hit an awesome nerve
the simplest answer is "Kurwa", because it's a beautiful word and such a useful one at that
however, i cannot use it. I have a speech defect that makes me sound funny when I curse out my friends. I have been told that I sound "cute" when I yell it but like I just called you a slut!!! bitch!!!
I know that it isn't a question about swear words but they are infinitely more interesting to talk about then normal words, so to answer your question - my favourite word is: "jeb"
What is "jeb" you ask - its an onomatopoeia. Simplest translation is "FUCKING SLAM" in all caps, just like that. Surprisingly useful!
Real life example from a conversation I had a week ago:
"I'll be sitting in my room all quiet then JEB kurwa my neighbor shut the door so hard the walls shook and he wasn't even done I'm trying to focus as he goes JEB JEB fucking insane"
Beautiful word!
You know I'm not even done with it! Jeb can be just the core of many, many beautiful words. Basically it's a core word to be used to make a swear word out of a verb. A few examples:
jebać - to fuck
zajebać - to fucking steal/kill/punch
przyjebać - to fucking punch
ojebać - to fucking eat whole
and also other useful words like
zajebiście - fucking awesome
Fun fact! You can do the same things with cores "kurwa" and "pierdolić" snd others so have fun with that
Another fun fact, with slight changes this will ALSO work in other Slavic languages (which is literally my studies rn), like in Czech or Ukrainian I think, and all the others will have some version of that. Definitely "Kurva"
My most favourite non-swear word is probably szczęście because foreigners make funny wide eyes at that
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