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ffixtionista · 4 months

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Gamer

pairing: sunghoon x fem!reader warning: half Lemon half Fluff(????), playful!sunghoon, suggestive content(?), probable gramatical errors, cursing

context: You and Sunghoon were stuck together. No matter what. You grew up together, always in the same school, classes, neighborhood, EARTH, and now, you had to be paired up with him for a science project. You guys were never too fond of each other, always competing with one another. This afternoon, you were headed to his house to continue your project.

It was 6 in the afternoon, and you were headed to Sunghoon's house. It was the time of the year when the night came a little earlier, so you wondered how you would come back home during the night. Finally arriving, after a good 10 minute walk, you knocked on the large door.

A middle aged woman opened it, a smile growing on her face as she sees you. "Y/n! Oh how good it is to see you, how are you!" She asked your slightly silly self, as you allowed yourself to be comfortable with her. Sunghoon's mom was in fact a very easy going woman.

After conversing for a short bit, she let you make your way to the devil's room (Sunghoon). Walking up the stairs and spotting his familiar room's door, you sigh. You brought yourself to finally knock on it. Ready to face the quite annoying boy, you waited. Waited.. and waited.

The man's not opening the door.

You knocked again now, a little louder and a little faster. "Sunghoon, open the door" You said, rolling your eyes. Seeing and hearing no sign of him, you decided to just barge in.

Opening the door, you finally found him. Playing on his computer. He had a headset on, which explained why he didn't open the door for you earlier.

"Are you serious" You said sighing. Sensing a presence, Sunghoon turned his head and finally saw you.

He gave you a nod of acknowledgement and looked at his game again. 'Is this dude really ignoring me?! Did he forget he had a project to do?' You thought to yourself. You frowned and finally spoke to him. "Sunghoon, get off your game" You threatened. He glanced at you and simply responded with "No".

You rolled your eyes again and approached him, placing down your backpack on his bed as you made your way towards him.

"Dude was that Y/n" You heard from Sunghoon's headset. "Bro you got a girl in your room? Dang man I didn't know yall were like that". Two different voices. "Shut up you fucking idiots" Sunghoon said. You quirked an eyebrow at him. You obviously knew who the voices belonged to, Jay and Jake. Then, you looked at his screen.

You could recognise that game anywhere. "Wait you're play overwatch?" You asked the boy. He looked at you a little weirdly. "Since when do you play games? I thought you were always busy doing uninteresting things that uninteresting people do" He verbally attacked you.

Offended, you replied quick. "Hah, funny because I'm ranked Grandmaster 2". That was a really high rank in the game. Yet you really owned it.

He frowned. He didn't believe you. "That's the funniest crap I've ever heard you say" Sunghoon said. "That's like saying you're Yuzuru Hanyu" He continued, still looking at his game.

You chuckled at his statement and shrugged your shoulders. "Let me play then I'll show you" You told him. You heard oooh's from his headset, and there was even more people than before. You could count 4 voices.

"aagh, fuck I died again" Sunghoon spoke loudly. He stared at you and realised what you said. "What, are you so scared that I'm better than you at this, Hoonie?" You teased.

"What the fuck, no I'm not" He frowned at the nickname and at the threat. There was no way you were actually ranked higher than him. He then smirked and told himself, 'no way'. The boy proceeded to mute himself and his friends.

Sunghoon pat his lap, as he faced you. "Come here" he ordered. You stared at him weirdly. "What, no" You denied his offer. "I'm not moving from here, I already spawned again, don't lose more time 'cause we're losing over here".

You thought about it for a second and gave in. 'What's the worst that could happen' Is what you thought, before looking at him and placing yourself on his lap.

He smirked and let yourself get comfy, he then disconected the headset from the PC, and unmuted his fellas as well as himself on discord. "I'm back, Y/n's gonna' show you guys how she plays" he laughed, telling his pals. "You really have no faith in me?" you said.

He chuckled and answered you playfully, "no, no I don't". His friends, which are also his classmates, teased the competitors for a minute, and stopped when they all realised Sunghoon's character, Hanzo, already had gained 4 kills, quickly advancing to the end.

Sunghoon's jaw almost fell, as he watched you play. "Waah she's really good" You heard Riki say. You chuckled. "Not too talkative, are we, Hoonie?" You teased him, quickly shut down with a 'shut up'.

You were pulled away from focus when you felt Sunghoon's arms wrap around your waist and pull you into a more comfortable position.

That action had made you die in the game, breaking your 10 kills streak. "Yah, what are you doing, I was carrying the team" you asked the boy. Muffled sounds were coming out of your classmate's mouths, as you practically dissed them.

You were so conscious of his fingertips against your t-shirt, you couldn't even concentrate to aim again. "Hmm? what are you talking about, I'm just getting comfortable" Sunghoon "innocently" answered.

You frowned a bit as you moved around to forget about it, which made Sunghoon groan quietly. You pursed your lips as you remembered you were in fact sitting on a boy. Even though you thought that you didn't care about him that way, you still had to be careful. He's still a guy with hormones. It was kind of too late to think like that, since you could feel a poke coming from beneath you.

You breathed in, before concentrating again. You seemed to forget what just happened after a short while, because your focused face said so.

Sunghoon found himself staring at you and forgetting almost everything else. Key word: almost. I mean, he was, having a boner because of you, but he was quick to ignore it, even though it was hard.

He was cut out of trance when he heard his friends screaming in victory and you smiling at the praises. "Y/n pass me your user and discord now please! We have to play again" You both heard Sunoo say.

Then, Sunghoon realised that you proved him wrong.

But fuck, why was he smiling at you?

Hehehe, hope you enjoyed!!!

No part 2 for this fic :) sorry

#sunghoon fluff #sunghoon x reader #sunghoon #enhypen imagines #enhypen fic #enhypen fluff #enhypen #park sunghoon #park sunghoon fluff

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futurewriter2000 · 3 months

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Astrology observations - pt. 2

A/N: You really liked part one, so here I am posting part 2 as well because why not. Also, it doesn't have to apply to you personally, it's just my personal observations.

Find part 1 here!

I don’t care what people say CAPRICORN PLACEMENTS ARE ALL ABOUT MONEY!!! Don’t lie to me! They’d choose working for more money rather than anything else! They do be disciplined tho… can’t relax tho…

Gemini Risings- the funniest people ever. They just crack the most random shit- like they won’t even be trying, the way they say it is funny. Man, I love them entertainers.

Leos, leos… I try to be on your side. I really do… I still am but sometimes it’s good to stay quiet and not hurt peoples feelings.

Aries are my second weakness after Scorpios. Aries ARE MY TYPE OF PEOPLE!!!! They just get the vibe, you know. They can always roast you better. They will always have ready a better comeback- lil fuckers. I can never win but they just get it. They're the best.

Air moons- we are the smartest and the dumbest people sometimes, you know. Like we know a lot and we are SO SMART but we can be so slow in some situations and do the stupidest things. Like we think smart but we do stupid things.

Not like Earth moons, they will think smart and be smart. Tactical lil manipulators, you are. Oh, I know earth signs. Yall be starting drama (Taurus I'm look at you) and then disappear in the background, watching it from a far. Yall, how many times did Taurus say something and then just drama started happening around that- I know yall be grinning.

Virgos do be suffering a lot. I know that. Not as much as Aquarius- nobody can beat an Aquarius in that competition but like Virgos (appereantly- read this in a book)- us Virgos are like surrounded by karma and our thing is appereantly to suffer a lot with people pleasing and watching other people win and what we gotta do is like not people please so we can win. Weird but I kind of relate to that.

Where the fuck are Pisces. I swear, this sign just diappears on me sometimes. Like, I wonder what stupid thing they'll do now. Did you sell your house, build a boat, go skydiving, get yourself a girlfriend/boyfriend you'll break a heart to or are you just lying in bed doing nothing? I gotta check on my Pisces people soon. Hope he didn't fuck up his court thing.

How do Leos... they just... they have people doing their work for them and I'm like... how do you get other people to do that and then I remember they're leos and those people are probably in love with them.

Gemini like rap- obviously because they can never shut up so they start music about not shutting up.

Aries... how's that anger management going? You still taking it on other people by roasting the shit out of them?

Capricorns have this empty stare... you know. They just stare at you. I think I mentioned that before but do you ever realise how you stupid you feel when they start to stare at you like that. Like I don't know what to do? WHAT DO YOU WANT?! Probably to rule the world but you know...

Have you ever realised Leos and Capricorns be hating on children but then be super good with their nephews or babies in general?

Libras are so fake but somehow I want to be their friend just for the gossip. Lmao. They be so toxic but the kind you want more.

Taurus- OH MY GOD YOU PISS ME OFF!- I love you though but you tickle that part of me that makes me want to throw shit at you.

#zodiac #zodiac signs #astrology #aries #taurus #gemini #cancer #leo #virgo #libra #scorpio #sagittarius #aquarius #pisces #capricorn #moon

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theficplug · 1 year

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Liked by octaviaspencer, loriharvey, kekepalmer, and 328,408 others

YourInstagramName: who told curly whirly to stick his whole face in my mug? 🤨🔎☕️

view all 22,453 comments

📌pinned YourInstagramName: he has hot chocolate in his own cup. he's fine y'all, pls don't call paw patrol.👼🏽🐾

marvelphase6: curls curls curls-

teyanataylor: KOTA👑

zoeisabellakravitz:🐨🧸🤎

tomholland2013: give him a sip 🥺

▪︎ YourInstagramName: there's 2 shots of espresso in this mug. Issa no from me playboy🤚🏾

Liked by naraaziza, lupitanyongo, ladymarvelade, and 967,321 others

tomholland2013: Mamá y Papá Night Out x 🤍🤍

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YourInstagramName: oh? Dilf. + 👶🍼❓️

▪︎tomholland2013: 👦🏻👸🏾🚀🎆

▪︎ladymarvelade888: not mum and dad getting spicy

taylorgiavisis: my people 💘

cocojones: we love love💕

selenagomez: loved meeting you two tonight!

liked by jurneesmollett, cocojones, debbieallen, quintabrunson, and 708,300 others

YourInstagramName: ugh paparazzi🙄📸😂

view all 199,333 comments

tomholland2013 : my photography career is loading😎🤤

quintabrunson: you and tom aren't that serious, right?

▪︎ YourInstagramName: are you suggesting...?👰🏾👰🏾💍

▪︎ tomholland2013: i'm right here! 🧍🏻‍♂️

▪︎quintabrunson: i'm coming to you as a woman😂-

naomicampbell: my baby😌

▪︎YourInstagramName: 😘😘🤎

cocojones: it girl

fentybeauty: sitting pretty 🪞

Liked by taylorgiavisis, naraaziza, jastookes, chrisevans and 507,228 others

YourInstagramName: Valentine's Day came early 🤍 👼🏽🧑🏻👩🏾💐.

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tomholland2013: sweet thing🤍

▪︎littlemissmelody: sdkfjfkdlld help he's so in love 😔 the little hand 🥺

▪︎caroldanverswife: this means hes back home and done filming 😎😎😎

chrisevans: my boys ! uncle chris & dodger miss you 3

▪︎YourInstagramName : come over unc, someone has to help this man with the grill 👨‍🍳🌚

Liked by chrisevans,normani, fentybeauty, marissatomei, kekepalmer, and 467,888 others

tomholland2013: happy anniversary. luckiest man on earth. 💍3💍

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YourInstagramName: you really caught me mid sentence like that😂🌚💀. Shady boots!just wait for my post 🤍

normani: oh, thee prettiest🤎

loriharvey: cuties✨️

marissatomei: daughter 👯🏾‍♀️

lupitanyongo: now why was i cropped out

▪︎YourInstagramName: but never cropped out of my heart💕

assembletherevengers: the way that i would fight you in a iHOP parking lot for an off chance of her possibly smiling at me

Liked by chrisevans, kekepalmer, angelabassett, and 989,321 others

YourInstagramName: this sums up 3 years of being married to you. Sweetest thing i've ever known 🤍💍🤍

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kekepalmer: BOY -

tomholland2013: I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME ?!?!

▪︎YourInstagramName: 😘 with my whole heart😘

megantheestallion: FREN, my stomach is hurting😭😭😭PLEASE

chrisevans:😹😹😹😹

anthonymackie: PLEASE send this to me 💀💀💀

▪︎YourInstagramName: 💀 i emailed it to you unc

marvellamutant: the way that shes the funniest person alive ssjdjkdfksl

tomhollandukupdates: tomholland2013 via

🟩Close Friends🟩

the mrs: ranting away about wanting fresh fruit with tajín & popcorn.

tom: "yOu PrEgNaNt AgAIn oR SoMetHiNg..OH just playing. 👀😳"

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📌pinned YourInstagramName: you're quick. tom's an old man who posts stuff on main by accident. this was up for less than 30 seconds 🍿🤷🏾‍♀️

▪︎ tomhollandukupdates: omg hi queen

tomholland2013: alright😐.

lucygoosey545: how did you even get this ?!

mcuphase6: this is why she never talks to yall . you always take it too far

tomhollanders: aksjfjflfl - DELETE THIS

tomsnewroman: the way that he looks so good though. She gets videos like this everyday, i'm sick🛐🛐

shesmorgan01: passenger princess tom rise 💅🏻

#tom holland x black reader #tom holland #tom holland x reader #peter parker #peter parker x reader #fake instagram #instagram au #fanfic for black girls

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trivijoy · 9 months

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★ moot appreciation time ! ★

- give a couple moots and says some things you love about them !!

whoever started this kinda ate 🫶🏾

@kelories - MY RIDE OR DIEEE I've known kel for like three years now 💗 my og my biggest fan my best friend fo life right here 😻 SHE NEEDS TO POST MORE THOU?? ILL FLAME U STOP WASTING UR TALENT 🔥🔥🔥 love u kori xxo

@koosuvi - one of my first besties that I met on here and definitely the one I talk with the most 🙈 literally the kindest funniest sweetest person on earth I've literally stayed up for hours talking to her and I'd do it again in a heartbeat 🫶🏾 love u mar xxo

@y-ves - one of the only bg stans I actually have fun talking to 💗 her mbs are almost as fire as her personality ‼️ an icon a legend THE y-ves ?! love u han xxo

@yeritos - tell me who's topping June's humor like let's b serious right neowww I literally can't look at anything paw patrol related without thinking of her 😭 a main slayer frls love u june xxo

@wiotas - mbs send literal shockwaves thru me like how do they never miss EACH TIME???? insanely talented yet so sweet and supportive 💗 love u leo xxo

@isamiracle - yk those people that makes everyone smile w whatever they say? I'm telling yall thas literally rina in a nutshell 🫶🏾🫶🏾 and do you see they blog?? A stunner ‼️ love u rina xxo

@lorlita - such a sweet soul I'll protect with my entire e-life I'm not kidding ☹️ the cutest layouts and mbs too like I can't make this up 💗 love u von xxo

@y-ujin - funny asl had me literally wheezing with tears streaming down my face this one time 😭 always tryna steal joy from me but she's loyal wbkkk 🙈 love u ky 🫶🏾

And sm others I could literally add twenty more but I've been typing all day omg (blame @kelories for being too funny) so if ur one of my moot baes nd ur seeing this I love u too xxo

Trivijoy is making her comeback 😈 be prepared ‼️ (fr this time)

#ive had get well soon by ariana grande on repeat for the last two hours uhm 😨

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ishinhd · 3 months

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Intro Post

Wassup yall my name is Ismail. I'm lowkey just taking this class for credit but it would be cool to learn about video and photo editing. I have zero practice in either so it'd be cool to dabble in them. In terms of confessions, I have a filter for most people in what I want and don't want to share. But if a persons energy is valid to me I'd prob match it and share more. All thats in person tho, I've taken myself off social media and don't be on the blogs anymore. I think social media just turned into a hotpot of mental illness and I was sipping that soup HEAVY. I didn't know a solution so I just deleted everything, which kinda worked. Except twitter, twitter was the funniest app on this Earth before that bozo killed it.

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aizenat · 25 days

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Apparently the 4B movement from SK is getting the attention of American women, and men, ESPECIALLY Black men, are PISSED.

The funniest thing to me is the “American women aren’t strong enough for 4b” and the “yall won’t get all women to do it so it’s pointless” arguments because you never needed an entire group of people to get shit done. Most women were not, and still aren’t, feminists, but we got rights and protections for women thanks to the FEW who were willing to do the work. There were plenty of Black people who weren’t protesting and marching during the civil rights movement, but we got those rights thanks to the FEW willing to sacrifice their time, jobs, livelihoods, freedoms, and literal lives in some cases for the cause.

You don’t need everyone to be part of a movement; you just need enough to get results. And considering how shaking and scared men are about this movement getting American women’s attention, you know they know they’re fucked. One dude said this movement getting attention is a win for red pilled men because the only women considering this are supposedly all over 30, and all have kids and/or high body counts, so this movement will weed us out. Meanwhile, he himself had a full grey beard indicating he was likely in his 50s if not 60s acting like women over 30 are spoiled good or some shit lol. Also while obviously sitting in a basic apartment living room, not even a nice condo or loft; nigga, what 20-something is going to want your old, broke ass? The fuck? Lol. Men’s is delusional.

And the pick mes making videos like “what about continuing the human race” (not our job; who cares? Earth won’t be inhabitable in like 50 years anyway. Who wants to give birth to a child we’ll probably have to bury or abandon in a desert tundra?) or “that’s gonna be lonely” (despite multiple recent studies reporting that women make up not having partners by investing their time and energy into hobbies, friendships, their community, and themselves, and report feeling happier for it), like why do yall care? Women not dating or fucking men means more men for yall right? Raise your chances of being picked. Why do you care if other women decide to step out of the conversation? Get your alpha red pilled man and live happily in peace and leave us alone lol.

The reality is men are reporting being lonely af rn. They aren’t having sex the way past generations did/do. They don’t have deep relationships with their families or other men. They don’t take care of themselves unless they have to keep themselves up for a woman. They don’t make their houses/apartments homes, decorating them, cooking and cleaning and making it feel like a home, etc. Men with wives literally live longer than single men (while the reverse is true for women; married women tend to die earlier than single women).

The data shows time and time again that women will be fine without men while men NEED women to be happy. This is why everyone is freaking out and trying to discourage women and girls from adapting that movement. Hell, many have already declared they won’t date (at least for now) because of how trash men are and have been getting worse over the years. Many women are already doing it! And are reporting they are happy! Happier even than when they were dating!

Men are terrified of the few bombshells they want to guilt and shame into being docile and meek wives will wise up and realize she’s too good for them. These men don’t want the pick mes! They want the sexy women who will fuck them on the first date! They don’t want conservative Christian girls who want to wait until marriage. They don’t want a good girl!

That’s why they lean so heavy into the red pill shit. It’s all a movement meant to try to shame women into thinking she has nothing to offer a man so she’ll settle for his ass. They want women to believe the lie that they are not the prize when women clearly ARE THE PRIZE! And that’s why they’re afraid of this movement. Because what if women decide they won’t fuck in the first date anymore? What if women will dump them over every red flag? It’s not like they should be expected to self reflect and change right? They literally don’t want to do the work to be good partners to women in order to get one, and so their goal is to shame women into accepting their shit. And if women swear off men entirely, won’t even fuck them, how will they ever get laid?????

If you’re straight or bi, seriously consider the 4b movement because this shit got these men TERRIFIED.

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kiermasz · 1 year

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for the first time in my life i really wanna make it work with somebody. and it's him. because he was raised just like me and had his ups and downs in growing up. likes silly songs from different artists. loves being on the low with music too. hurts people like me. is the funniest person on earth. loves his city ironically but i know. is a crazy stalker at heart just like me even though i never thought i'd confess to it not psychotic. loves different things than me but with the same flame. is a cancer. is super nice even though he plays tough and above it. hurts people like me because he's scared of real intimacy too. and if it works it works. if it doesn't whatever. maybe it's all just a game for us. but it's the realest i've ever had so i'll try to heal so i can hug him finally even if as friends if it doesn't work. and it's my greatest fear. but i can face it. and that's what's different from last year. fuck yall.

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khaleesiofalicante · 2 years

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We found the one who is going to give that heart attack to Alec we all dreaded. By what we saw from Mal, she is totally capable of inducing one lol

You've connected the dots.

#yall the fucking funniest people on earth istg #ily *cries*#lbaf

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froyo-ocs · 2 years

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WAIT ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT THE PERSON WHO SENT THOSE ASKS WERENT EVEN FROM THE SAME BLOG THAT THE CHARACTERS WERE FROM💀💀

#I THOUGHT THAT YALL THREE GOT TOGETHER AND DECIDED TO BE THE FUNNIEST PEOPLE ON EARTH OMG IM GOING TO DIE SJFJSJD

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daverygalskisbff · 3 years

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could we get some allura & lance friendship prompts? i LOVED your other ones btw 💖💖💖💖

HI I'm sorry this took forever I have honestly no idea why bc I adore these two and I ADORE this prompt so my brain should not have shut down the way it did. anywayz to make up for the wait i tried to make this a bit longer than my usual posts :) I hope you like it!

(also, as usual, everything here I came up with myself, and if there's any similarity to someone elses post I apologise and promise it wasn't intentional)

now without further ado,

Lance and Allura!

similar to lance and pidge, the two are decidedly Not close in the beginning

i had an entire thing about how i imagine they became friends at first written out, but it was a tad too long and i didn't want to clog up the post with too much exposition. so instead, let's just skip forward and get into their dynamic after they become buddies :) (however, if anyone wants to see the backstory I would not be opposed)

although he no longer has a crush on her, lance makes it a point to hype her up as much as he possibly can

at first allura was confused, because she thought it was him trying to flirt with her still, but once she understood what was going on she was more than willing to join in

lance when allura completely destroys the training droid: WOWZA ladies and gentlemen of the jury may I present to you the icon the legend the moment herself her royal highness princess allura of altea!!!!! if you thought that was impressive just WAIT till she gets warmed up because this is just the beginning!!! she can even do it in heels-

shiro: lance, please focus, this is really important that we-

allura: no no, shiro, please. let him finish.

they both show their friendship in slightly different ways. lance's way is that he is physically incapable of not humouring the princess

allura when lance shows her his cartwheel: incredible!!!!!!! i have never been more impressed in my life!!! do you think you could do it in heels??

lance: uhhh. y'know princess I'm really loving the faith, but-

allura: :)?

lance:.... what if you don't have my size?

lance fractured his ankle. allura has yet to stop apologising.

allura's way is definitely safer, but it's also a lot more... cluttered. to say the least.

allura, returning from a recon mission with a tiny bag filled with what looks like tiny, glittery dinosaur figurines made of glass: lance! look at what i bought for you!

lance, taking one look at the contents of the bag: wow, 'lurra, this is… so nice of you

allura: lance, are you. are you crying?

lance (definitely crying): what? NO! of course not!! I'm just. allergic, to. uh. oxygen.

allura: what.

allura never had any siblings back on altea, but she always wanted them

this, paired with how much lance misses his own family, means that the two of them kind of gravitate towards each other in terms of siblinghood.

as a child allura would imagine what it would be like to have siblings, but especially a twin. she would fall asleep to dreams of secret handshakes, finishing each other's sentences, and swapping places to trick people

she doesn't realise the brother she has found in lance until a long time after they've become close (how would she recognise a dynamic she has never been privy to?)

this realisation happens on just a random day in the castleship lounge. she is talking to hunk, when suddenly lance, who she didn't even realise was listening to their conversation, butts in and finishes her sentence.

she's annoyed at being interrupted at first, but then what happened sinks in, and suddenly she's fighting off tears. lance doesn't know why she's crying, but he hugs her anyway.

the two of them match accessories a lot

with allura's love of pretty things (and the abundance of stuff in her closet) paired with lance's natural dramatics, nobody else on the team is entirely sure of whether this is intentional or not.

it started off as intentional. it is now second nature.

one decision, however, was completely planned and thought out for exactly twenty minutes, and then deeply regretted by both parties for the next 48 hours

allura pierced lance's ears

now before you get judgemental, you try making a smart decision at two am space-time while very giddy and slightly buzzing on some weird old alien candy that not even your resident alien is sure the ingredients of. then talk to me.

pidge: okay so you're gonna need a needle, ice, and… yeah I'm pretty sure that's it

lance: don't we need a potato too

pidge: … why the fuck would you need a potato

lance: I dunno!!! my sister pierced her friend's ears one time and she mentioned a potato!!! I'm just trying to make sure everything goes well, pidge!

allura: I love these earth customs you two are showing me!! when I got my ears pierced it was done with some kind of laser, but your way sounds much more fun :).

allura: also, what is a "potato" and where can we find one?

it goes about as well as you would expect

the excited buzz on lance lasts about three ticks into the process, and then the screaming starts

pidge (the genius who came up with the idea) gives him some altean taffy to chew on to stop him from making too much noise, and allura, the angel, is babbling right along with him

allura, with tears in her eyes: how was I supposed to know it was going to hurt mine didn't hurt well it was 10,000 years ago and I was very young altean children don't have very strong pain receptors you know, maybe that's why my parents had it done at that age, or maybe your people are just completely barbaric, who thought this would be a good idea?? pidge why did you suggest this poor lonce is in tears lonce I'm so sorry but if it's any consolation at all at least now your ears won't be nearly as hideous as before and you can borrow as many of my earrings as you want except for the sparkly green ones that dangle those are my favourite well they're actually my second favourite I'm wearing my favourite - you can't borrow those either, by the way, but you can have any of the others I promise

lance, also crying and still chewing the altean taffy: hhb, llura yub domf hoff do bologuys, ss long'ss yub sanstsd thu niddle frst

allura (who did not remember to sanitize the needle), now crying freely: I don't understand what you're saying

(pidge records the entire thing)

the next day lance wakes up with ears that are very sore and slightly green, and allura faints

they spend the entire morning avoiding shiro in case they get in trouble and trying to figure out how to get the healing pods to work

lance: what do you mean you don't know allura you literally lived in one of these

allura: I was asleep the whole time!!! don't put this on me!!

lance: don't put- you are the one that pierced my ears, allura, of course it's on you!

coran, who has been watching this entire interaction in silence: oh, I thought i noticed something different about you, number three!

lance and allura: [screaming]

coran helps them set up the healing pod

unfortunately lance has to take the earrings out, so the holes close back up, but fortunately coran just so happens to know how to pierce ears the correct way that they did on altea

lance, after half a day in the healing pod, watching coran advance upon him with a literal handheld flamethrower that shoots lasers: is it too late to go back to the ear infection

coran is surprisingly very adept at the skill of altean beautification (an activity that has a surprisingly long and rich backstory, which lance and allura get an in-depth lesson on for the hour that it takes to do lance's ears properly)

they're exhausted afterwards, but lance looks great, so they're in good moods regardless

they like to teach each other about things from their respective planets - both for fun, and because it helps them feel less homesick

whenever allura is particularly down about the loss of altea, lance will visit her in her room, and the two of them will just lie together on her bed.

they don't say much, most of the time, just link their pinkies together and stare at the ceiling

when they do talk, it's quiet, and always allura who starts it - she might share something she remembers about altea, and lance listens quietly and then responds with something he misses about cuba

it isn't always sad tho - sometimes they just talk about things they remember that pop into their heads, or explain things to each other that they wouldn't otherwise know

at the space mall, they make a game out of pointing things out to each other and trying to guess what it is (allura can only guess when they're in the earth shop, but it's okay because she more than makes up for it in enthusiasm)

lance, holding a my little pony collectible: okay princess. what is this.

allura, completely serious: a weapon

lance: ... close

allura, holding up a set of magnetic heart necklaces to the light: what does… "biffs" mean?

lance: it's "bffs," princess, it means "best friends forever"

allura: oh! you mean like me and you?

lance:

lance: 'lurra what did we say about making me cry in public, we've talked about this-

(they buy the necklaces. obviously.)

they mess with each other's hair a lot

once allura learns that lance's hair is naturally curly, and that he just straightens it all of the time, she makes it her god-given mission to convince him to wear it naturally more often

this mission includes plans such as stealing his hair straightener, "donating" a bunch of curly hair products to him because she "doesn't have the space", and getting keith to say he thinks curly hair is cool one day in the rec room

she still thinks it's the funniest thing ever that that actually worked

other than week-long sabotage plots, they both think it's fun to have lance braid allura's hair

he used to braid his sister's and niece's hairs all of the time, so he has a knack for it that allura did not expect at all but is obsessed with anyway

allura, coming to lance's room a few hours before another diplomatic party: hey..... how yall doin.....

lance, already prepared with a million different brushes and bands: oh my god just get in already

lance and allura have a lot in common

one of these things, they learn very early into their relationship, is that they are both disasters when it comes to pretty girls (and boys, but that's a lance-exclusive situation)

so they become each other's wingmen

they both tend to get… a little too into it

the team: [at a diplomatic ball]

lance, seeing a pretty alien girl looking allura's way and "politely" speedwalking over to her: alluralluraalluraalluraalluralluraalluraalluraalluralluraalluraallura pretty girl look over there eleven o'clock LOOK she's gonna walk away looklooklook

allura: lance darling thank you so much for your help but I am in the middle of talking to the president

and alternatively:

allura tries to set lance and keith up all the time. at first she was worried she would be overstepping boundaries, but after one particular sleepover where lance spent an entire hour lamenting his "bad luck" she decided to take things into her own hands

this includes, but is not limited to; sending them on supply missions alone together (often), mentioning particular things lance has done to his appearance to keith every time she can, and talking about specific paladin bonds more than she maybe should

lance hates it

keith, walking into the lounge: h-

allura, immediately: hello keith!! help settle an argument, will you :)?

keith: um… okay

allura: lovely! now, tell me, do you think lance looks cuter today than he did yesterday? we can't seem to agree on whether or by he's stunning or simply handsome. what do you think?

keith: uh-

allura: oh, and while I have you, have you noticed that his ears are pierced?

lance, beet red: allu-

allura: what :(?? can't i be proud of my handiwork??

lance, to keith: I am not associated with her

after a week of this keith literally sets up a system where if allura is in a room he walks into he just does a complete 180 and walks back out

one time, at a diplomatic meeting, an alien politician mistook them for a couple and they both choked on their drinks at the same time, and then got offended that the other one agreed that the concept was insane

allura: what happened to being the princess of your dreams, lance?? I thought I MEANT something to you. obviously! i was wrong!

lance: oh yeah?? then why did you GIGGLE, allura. what's so funny, huh?? my good looks??? my charming charisma?? how far out of your league I am???

allura:

lance: okay maybe that last one was a bit of a stretch

another thing lance and allura do is pronounce each other's names wrong

they call each other lonce and allora

it started as lance kind of making fun of allura's accent, but turned into just one of their Things

allura honestly didn't know it was a bit until the habit had been long constructed

#pippa.post #pippa.canon #vld lance #vld keith #vld allura #klance #vld pidge #pippa.ask #vld shiro #i added klance bc i know you like it gia i hope this was up to your standard <3 #vld coran #vld team

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notyouraveragepromptpage · 3 years

Text

I was hanging out with my brother today. He’s still in high school and he works in retail and was talking about this rude customer that came in last night. Her card was declined when she was trying to buy shoes, so my brother (being the nice guy he is) offered to set up an afterpay for her.

She tried to use an expired coupon. She also seemed to have no idea what on Earth sales tax is.

She huffed and puffed and said no. Then she started screaming about how his generation is unwilling to accommodate the elderly (this after he tried to compromise three different times) and how she was just going to leave. He said “I am so sorry you feel that way ma’am. I hope you have a great day.”

All hell broke loose. She ripped him up one side and down the other, first for calling her ma’am, and also for not trying to sell the shoes. (He was though so??) She cussed at him and threatened to burn the store down. He immediately said, “ma’am I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to leave.”

Understand that my brother means no disrespect. We live in the south. We say yes/no ma’am and yes/no sir. It’s out of respect for the older people, not to diminish them. He politely informed her of this, but it only made her more angry.

She took the shoe box with the shoes in it, turned, and ran out the “door.” Only, she didn’t. You see, my brother works in a store in which the entire front side is made up of windows. So, when she tried to make off with the shoes she ran right. Into. The. Glass.

Her face print was noticeable.

My brother walked over and grabbed the box of shoes that had fallen onto the ground, tucked them behind the counter, and helped Miss Ma’am up while trying not to laugh. The funniest thing on the planet is when people fall and are okay and no one can convince me otherwise.

AND THEN HE SAID TO ME......

“And I’ll tell ya, for someone who had to have been around since the creation of the Earth, she sure doesn’t know how things work around here.” And I. Lost it.

Yall my sweet little southern brother is a SAVAGE

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1d-discourseoftheday · 3 years

Text

Tues 26 Jan ‘21

Louis tweeted “How's everyone doing?” No Louis, HOW ARE YOU DOING?? “Alright thanks!” he says. It's the third time this month he's checked on us but does that Mean anything? Says SBB himself, “You lot read into things too much” HAHAHAHHAAAA SKSKKDJ WE LEARNED IT FROM YOU MOM!! Well WHY is MTV posting about Copy then?? asked a fan in a very GOTCHA tone but Louis has an unarguable answer: “because it's a banger.” Well alright alright you got us there, that's very true. He says many other little things too including Strong Opinions about breakfast food (“pancakes obviously” ...was that in fact ...obvious??) and talking about a sports related series he's watching-- it really is about basketball this time unlike UFC! He also tells us that he tried to talk to Liam “earlier” “but he was in Tesco”. A fan posted that he replied to a their DM- a picture of their cat pawing adoringly at a pic of Louis- and said “this put me in such a good mood haha! Love the little lad. Bless him x”, but then later they said they it was fake, sorry. A convincing Louis imitation, but more to the point a very convincing screen record video showing the exchange: please remember this next time such a video is offered as proof for something.

Niall is in the studio with his favorite collaborators, Eskeerdo and John Ryan! The man does value consistency in all things, no question, but you know what they say- if it ain't broke, don't fix it! Despite a Morning Mashup snippet from yesterday where he agreed with the host that maybe their little kid shouldn't be exposed to Small Talk, we know he is happy with the Heartbreak Weather sound, so why not more of the same? The only question I have is: when?

Zayn's sponsorship deals continue to be increasingly wacky; today it's a coloring app! The Nobody Is Listening coloring book is now available; as usual, things I really could NOT have predicted happening every single day around here. Liam's sponsorship is less wacky today: a new Hugo pic posted.

And the greatest showmance of our generation continues to amaze, astound, and crack me the F up-- first up, in hands down the funniest thing to happen all week, Harper’s Bazaar retitled a Holivia timeline article with the headline “Sorry everyone, Olivia Wilde and Harry Styles' romance isn't a PR stunt” (and added a little blurb at the end of 'a source' saying so) which is hilarious enough on its own, the DEFENSIVENESS, but THAT'S NOT ALL! The author of the article, seeing it, tweeted “I didn't even write this! It's an old article that's been updated. I DEFINITELY think it's PR...” HAHAHAHA WHAT AN ICON. She didn't lay out that whole embarrassing timeline in print to be disrespected like this, Harper’s Bazaar! But less funny, she was disrespected by more than just the magazine-- she deleted her account due to harassment after the tweet. Sighhh. Those harries sure do love to TPWK (threat). PR for this shitshow is taking a turn for the defensive all over this week, as we saw with yesterday's Vogue article; that piece seems to have been the leading edge of an iceberg that is the new angle- 'Olivia Isn't The Bad Guy Here'. Fine, yes, no one is because this ISN'T REAL so truly whatever yall, but the really hysterical thing about the Vogue piece apparently being more or less HQ dictated is that at least like half of it is just “terrible things people are saying on twitter” and “here's why twitter is annoying” and I'm ROLLING at them sinking to this level, like when you are at the point of trying to take down twitter arguments one by one you have officially LOST CONTROL OF THE CONVERSATION lmao and lbr-- they have. People simply do not think this is real and it is funnnnny. AND SPEAKING of sinking to a level and then just keeping going right down to the molten core of the earth, can I just mention that Michael Strauss, aka the guy who is suing Briana for her boobs (case was postponed; has not yet been heard), has not only been arguing in the comments over at CelebTM that NO, REALLY it's NOT WEIRD that the sonogram pic posted was clearly not Briana's and is making up stories trying to explain it, he's now doing so from his dog's account. Will his dog also be heading over to TMZ, who tweeted the article today, to argue with people one by one in those comments? We've seen a lot of dogs used for stunt purposes, but at least they never put the words in Max or Clifford's actual mouths!

#Louis tomlinson #niall horan #liam payne #zayn #harry styles #people are now saying it was a fake account (the bazaar writer) and not really her but I checked it out and it wasn't fake #she was extremely cool and I followed her in fact but alas she's gone again now #she had recently remade her account after previously deleting over stan harassment to do with her coverage of the royal family #(this is a woman who knows from PR!)#and was like I think I made a mistake rejoining twitter-- and then deleted #is louis thinking about us a lot because he's also in the studio?#I believe he is still in LA and very possibly doing studio stuff so that's where my mind goes #Louis: man they're gonna love this stuff I'm working on time to tell them absolutely nothing about it! nailed it #it would mean he tried to call Liam very early (for Louis) but I can imagine he would want to try to catch him early in Liam's day #anyway not to READ INTO THINGS TOO MUCH or anything but it was pointed out that Michael Jordan #who Louis tweeted about the series about #was the subject of multiple paternity suits that were determined to be false claims #26 jan 21 #holivia

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yourboyfriendimagines · 3 years

Note

Heya! I would like to ask for a...maybe a Yandere Peter and a tsundere Y/N?

-yall are the funniest mfs on earth

-he's literally stabbing someone right behind you and you have your arms crossed with a pouty lip going on

-listen. He loves bratty people, it's his weakness.

-but like for real, he clings to you and professes his love to you on the daily and you just look like an angry hamster.

-he could not be happier

-he especially loves when he grabs your hips while you're cooking dinner and you just start verbally drilling into him

-shut up you like it you liar

-maybe if you ate your spaghetti you'd calm down

-but like yeah he absolutely loves you and your attitude

-he thinks it's funny when you scold him for showing you affection

-and it IS funny, he's like a foot or so taller than you

-please show him the same amount of love tho, he really needs it

-he'll get insecure if he's love starved for long enough

-and when he's insecure

-he hurts people

-not you tho, he'd never hurt a hair on your bratty little head

#your boyfriend peter #your boyfriend game #your boyfriend imagines #mod jamie #brat taming has a special place in my heart but thats for another day and another ask #tw stab mention

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beomglocks · 3 years

Text

sk8ter boi ; c.bg

summary : he was a boy, she was a girl. can i make it anymore obvious?

pairing : skaterboy!beomgyu x reader

warnings & other : reader already has a child with yeonjun ok, beomgyu still pining after all these years, based off queen avril lavigne’s sk8ter boi song, listen while reading if you want

w/c : 2.1K (i may have gotten carried away)

"where'd you get that note and roses from?" your friend maria asks you when you get into class. you wipe away your smile quickly, already knowing who the mystery person was. "i don't know."

yeah, of course you knew. how could you not when the boy oh so clumsily shoved them in your locker while you were literally turning the corner. he tried to act like he wasn't doing anything but he was clearly caught. he tried to play it off in the best way possible and smooth talk his way into a conversation with you but you shut him down due to the bell ringing.

"oh- oh ok sure...yeah," beomgyu stumbled over his words, nervousness eating away at him with you being here. "yo gyu you coming? i just finished fixing my drum kit," his friend, jeongin, calls him over, interrupting your already over conversation.

"you should go...but thanks for whatever you just threw in my locker," you laugh. he nods hesitantly, rubbing the back of his head with his hand. "dude," jeongin now stands in your vicinity. he looks at you and beomgyu before pulling away his best friend to where the spare band room was.

"well open the letter, we wanna know who your little secret admirer is," maria says, leaning onto your desk. your other friends agree, eager to know who was pining over you. you laugh nervously before opening it. you're not sure how they'll react to finding out that it's beomgyu.

you see, you wouldn't exactly call yourself the prettiest girl in the school but hell it sure was close. almost everyone would compliment you every day even if it was something minor like a change in your nail color. you kind of prided yourself in that, not to gas yourself up or anything.

someone like beomgyu...well. he wasn't exactly the ideal guy, to put it simply. he was a skater boy, he hung out with the "simple boys" who skated and did music and hung out around the skate parks after school. he wasn't the scholar type like soobin or the athlete type like yeonjun, he was simple.

you liked simple but your friends didn't. they had preferences for people like soobin and yeonjun, not people like beomgyu. you could probably guess they felt like beomgyu was the bottom of the barrel, like a roach on their foot not worthy of their time.

you pull the letter out of the envelope. for some reason without even trying, you could smell his cologne all over it. you want to smile at the obvious try hard gesture but your friends don't allow it. "what the fuck is that smell, it's so strong," maria gags. you roll your eyes at her dramatics. "it doesn't smell that bad."

"yes the fuck it does," she retorts. "just see what it says." you read over the letter, smiling at certain parts where you could tell he'd done his research on the things you liked. "it's from beomgyu," you say when you finish the letter. you already knew this anyway but maria's eyes go wide and she suddenly snatches the letter from your grasp. "hey!"

"CHOI beomgyu?" she asks while she reads the letter herself. "yeah?" you confirm.

your other friends mumble amongst themselves and you can hear some snicker. "y/n you could do so much better. beomgyu is like a street rat or something. don't do that to yourself," she laughs like it's the funniest thing she's ever said. you don't think beomgyu's that bad but you also don't stand up for him, simply biting your lip as she continues.

"he barely comes to school and when he does all he does is sleep. he skates with those other weirdos and thinks he's gonna make it big with his shitty guitar playing- i mean have you heard him?" she rolls her eyes, throwing the letter back on your desk. "you should go out with yeonjun, i think yall would be a cute couple. the prettiest girl with the coolest guy, your babies would be so damn cute."

"babies?!" you laugh at her ridiculousness. "yes! have you seen choi yeonjun?" she sighs in content. "anyways, don't pay beomgyu any mind because he's not gonna make it in life. go for someone like yeonjun and please for the love of god throw that letter away!"

you never did throw the letter away. you sigh as you think back to your high school years. you had just found it hidden behind one of the closet drawers while you were looking for valkyrie's binkie. she was crying so much since her father had gone out for the day and you were stuck taking care of her, as always.

you wonder how beomgyu was doing. you both talked after the fact but fell off during college since he had gone off to do his own thing. you didn't know what that thing was but you were proud of him nonetheless. you finished high school, went to college, got a good paying job, and were now married with a kid. all at the young age of 21. the typical life, you figure.

you're snapped out of your thoughts when you hear your child crying in the next room. "shit," you mumble to yourself. you leave the letter in your drawer and head back to the living room with the binkie. "valkyrie~" you sing song.

she continues crying, not giving a fuck about your efforts to calm her. she was usually a bit of a daddy's girl. "val please stop crying," you exasperate. "daddy's not coming home until late today. cut me some slack babygirl."

you slip the binkie into her mouth but her shrill cries go right through it. "let me go see if you need a diaper change," you mutter.

before you can even get up from the couch you hear your phone ring from somewhere in the couch. "shit where did i put my phone?" you put valkyrie down to look for your phone but it stops ringing before you can begin searching. you wait for it to ring again you find it between the cracks of the couch.

"oh hey mari," you say in confusion. after high school ended, you and maria kind of fell off along with all your other popular friends. you still had that clout all throughout college given who you were dating but you kind of strayed away from her. you guys were still on speaking terms though but this call was odd since it had been months since the last time she called.

"GIRL-" she pauses for a moment, still as dramatic as ever. "what it is mari? val won't stop crying she needs attention," you sigh, looking over at your daughter. her cries had gotten softer but she was still grumpy about not being with her father.

"girl turn on your tv to MTV right now- like right now before you miss it!" she says hurriedly. "this better be good you know i dont watch those shows," you say into the phone. you place the phone between your ear and shoulder so you can hold valkyrie while watching whatever it was that maria wanted you to watch.

then you see it. "is that-?" you begin. "CHOI beomgyu! yes girl!" maria finishes your sentence. she's right. there he is, the boy you were just thinking about was on your tv screen. "he's famous?" you ask.

maria sucks her teeth, "apparently after high school and like a year or two of college, he dropped out to pursue a music career and i guess it worked out for him." you nod even though she can't see you. "he signed with a label and now he's in like some super fucking famous band, look at him," she continues.

you stare at your tv screen in silence, watching beomgyu have the time of his life on the MTV stage. he really did get good on his guitar. the camera pans to the drummer and your eyes go wide when you see jeongin. wow, they really stayed together this whole time.

"he's fine as hell," you admit. you hear maria cackle on the other side, "you said it, he looks so attractive playing guitar like that, look at his fingers."

"ok alright maria, i have a child right next to me," you say. she laughs again, "anyways, i got tickets to their next show. you wanna come with?"

you're not sure how you managed to convince yeonjun to stay home with the baby while you went out with maria to this concert, but you did it. he was skeptical of letting you go out with what you were wearing which is why you both argued before you eventually stormed out to go anyways.

when you met up with maria outside the venue she looked up and down with a knowing smile. "i thought that pussy belonged to mr. choi yeonjun? what're you all dressed up for?"

"dressed up?" all you were wearing was a black and white bandana for a top and tight leather pants and comfortable shoes. "do the pants really have to hug your ass like that though?" she jokingly slaps your butt and you glare at her. "that's what yeonjun said," you mumble to yourself.

the concert goes smoothly and you're glad you actually got to see beomgyu in person and playing guitar. one thing about choi beomgyu is that he will play guitar like it's his last day on earth. he plays with so much intensity that you almost feel bad for the guitar.

you could almost feel how the crowd's energy in this packed room transferred to the members. if it was even possible, they started to play with more vigor.

at some point, beomgyu was full on immersed in his own playing. his once fluffy hair was now soaked with sweat and covering his forehead and eyes. he kept headbanging along to the beat while skillfully moving his fingers along the strings of the guitar.

during the middle of one of their songs, beomgyu took the center stage for his guitar solo. it was a fast paced riff that just seemed to give the song more life. his head is down so that it's solely focused on the guitar but once he finished the hardest part of the riff he looked up smugly. the crowd went absolutely mad when beomgyu bit his lip during the rest of his solo.

you had to admit the boy had stage presence, you practically almost re-fell in love with him.

after the show, you and maria went to get refreshments at the nearby bar. beomgyu seemed to already be there talking to one of his members so you took this opportunity to speak with him. you wonder if he'll remember you after all these years but you take your chances.

"beomgyu!" you shout over the music that's playing in the background. he whips his head around to the sound of his name being called and smiles lightly when he sees you. when you get to him, he subtly looks you up and down, taking in your body and attire. "y/n is that you?" he says, his voice laced with something teasing.

"you remember me?" you ask him with a smile. "how could i forget a face like yours," he smiles, leaning back. you laugh and he smiles. "i just saw you on stage, i never thought you'd become this huge! congrats!"

he nods, "yeah, i always wanted to make it big you know." he trails off, looking over you again like he's entranced somehow. "so how's life? you still with-"

"yeonjun...yeah we um- we have a kid...now," you finish nervously. did he really have to bring yeonjun up right now. "a kid?" he says, surprised. "let me see."

you show him a selfie of you and valkyrie that you took at a time when she wasn't completely hating your existence and wanting to cuddle her father instead of you. he laughs and leans back once again, "she's cute like you, she definitely got her mom's features."

"yeah and she's got her dad's attitude," you say, mostly to yourself but beomgyu catches it. "oh yeah! i wanted to say, i really like that one song you played, uh- fairy?"

"fairy of shampoo? yeah we added our own little rock twist to it," he says. "you know the lyrics are actually about y-" your phone cuts him off and you apologize, turning away to answer it. "what is it yeonjun"

beomgyu sighs in frustration when he hears you say that. when you finish talking you turn back to him and he has his eyebrow raised in question. "looks like my fun is over," you laugh dryly. he nods in understanding, "before you go though, let me get your number so we can catch up sometime."

you agree, not wanting to pass up the chance to reconnect with your now famous friend.

"maybe we'll see each other around gyu," you smile, beginning to walk away.

he smiles at the old nickname, waving you off, "i sure hope so."

#beomgyu imagines #beomgyu reactions #beomgyu drabbles #beomgyu drabble #txt imagines #drabble #tomorrow x together imagines #txt headcanons #beomgyu headcanons #txt reactions #txt scenarios #beomgyu timestamps #beomgyu fic #beomgyu x reader #beomgyu fluff #fluff

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