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#which is of course the point. the point is that Roger’s is committing an act worse than any pirate and he has the backing of the Law
takiki16 · 26 days
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I will wait for dinner to settle BEFORE I watch the keelhauling episode
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I’m curious about Steve Rogers’ “dark side” and your thoughts on that in the MCU! I don’t recall seeing Cap’s dark side in the MCU tbh.
Hello! This is an excellent question and I hope you don't mind my answer being very salty. Because it is one of the things about the MCU that turns me into a bloodthirsty beast out for Marvel executive jugulars.
Now, the concept of Steve's "dark side" is introduced in Age of Ultron, in an exchange between Tony and Steve where Steve says that Tony hasn't "seen yet" Steve's dark side. It is obviously foreshadowing for Civil War, were, supposedly, we . . . see Steve's dark side.
Except we don't.
Except Marvel wants us to see Steve's choices in Civil War as driven by Steve's dark side.
Except they're not.
Nothing Steve does in Civil War is morally reprehensible, unless we agree that he should have just punched Tony in the face right away and that being polite for so long was in fact wrong of him. (This is mostly sarcasm with an edge of truth.)
So what is supposed to Steve's dark side? According to the creators' official version, Steve's . . . selfishness? In putting his own priorities (Bucky) before the group (the Avengers). He broke up the Avengers to pursue his personal interest. Right? Wrong, of course. The Avengers break up because Tony pursues a morally reprehensible line and Steve does not accept to follow him through it.
But hey. They tried to make a "balanced" conflict where both parties had some good points. They failed. But I guess they tried.
But! Not only the Avengers thing. Steve's dark side is also . . . preventing Tony to pursue his revenge over Bucky. Because that's what the excange in AoU foreshadows, right? The big conflict between the two characters in the scene.
Except Steve is doing the morally right thing in preventing a man from committing an extrajudicial murder of a person who was not accountable for the actions in question. (Actually even if Bucky was actually guilty of the crime, acting as judge, jury and executioner would still be wrong, although understandable. But Bucky was not accountable at all, and Tony knew that - Tony was aware of the conditions of Bucky's unaccountability.)
In fact, before the final fight they do reconcile, or at least they’re on their way to reconcile, before Tony decides that it’s his right to attempt to extrajudicially execute an innocent. So this is not even about the accords anymore, and, again, this is . . . you know . . . kinda on Tony. (The creators also confirmed that a large part of Tony’ motivation for murdering Bucky was to hurt Steve, which makes it worse.) Steve was just like. Um I don’t want my friend to be murdered.
So, what's Steve dark side? According to Marvel, his attachment to Bucky over his attachment to the Avengers. And this is the part that makes me bloodthirsty the most: it's homophobic af! Ironically, Marvel execs would die before purposely making Steve Rogers queer, and yet at the same time they managed to be homophobic to him. Spectacular.
The bond between Steve and Bucky, no matter what the MCU tries to say, it's obviously . . . ambiguous. It is a very strong and emotional bond between two men. Steve's attachment to the Avengers, on the other hand, is dramed as a familial bond, the Avengers being a "family" that Steve breaks up because of Bucky. So the ambiguously homoerotic bond destroys the familial bond. I don't need to say how same-sex relationship have been long accused to being destructive of the good, healthy familial bonds of our society!
In fact, the “nu-uh, no gayness here, nope nope nope” attitude of Disney towards Captain America wasn’t actually a thing yet when they were making the movie. (Civil War I mean). At some point, when the movie was almost finished, someone intervened and the movie was tweaked to make it ~less gay~. But at first the movie was being made purposely ambiguously gay! So it’s not just my fervid hysterical imagination. Steve and Bucky’s bond was intended to be, while not gay-gay because that doesn’t happen here, but kinda-gay.
So. The homoerotic bond is toxic and destructive of familial bonds. A man’s dark side is his attachment to another man. Yay. Fun.
At least that was the intention, because as you say there’s hardly ever something that can be called a “dark side” in Steve because whatever he fights for is a good cause. Bucky is an innocent who’s wrongly persecuted after being heavily victimized. Preventing him from being killed on sight for a crime he had not in fact committed at all is a good cause, even if they had no bond between them. Refusing to sign the “accords” is a good choice because the storyline was ridiculously, offensively written they made no fucking sense and also, you know, human rights. Stopping Tony from extrajudicially executing a man for actions the man was not accountable for is a good cause.
So, yeah. Bad writing plus bad writing equals a confusing mess.
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mitchipedia · 4 months
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The secret history of Napoleon Bonaparte: Watching “The Emperor’s New Clothes” (2002) starring Ian Holm
We saw “The Emperor’s New Clothes,” an idiosyncratic and charming historical romantic-comedy that starred Ian Holm and came out in 2002.
Napoleon, in exile on the island of St. Helena after his defeat at Waterloo, executes a scheme to escape and be replaced on the island by a double, a common seaman who looks exactly like Napoleon, whose name is Eugene Lenormand. Napoleon will settle in Paris incognito, and the false Napoleon will reveal his true identity, as will the true Napoleon. France will rally and the empire will be restored.
But the plan goes wrong, and Napoleon needs to survive in Paris as Lenormand.
Fortunately for Napoleon, he’s taken in by a pretty widow.
But Napoleon never loses hope, and never stops planning to resume his rightful place as emperor.
Meawhile, he and the widow fall in love. She thinks he’s just Lenormand, a commoner like her, maybe someone who once did prison time.
Holm plays both Napoleon and the sailor Lenormand. He gives two great performances. As Napoleon, Holm is commanding, striding about erect with his hands clasped behind him. And he’s also sad and brave as he adjusts to life without the trappings and luxury of power.
In an early scene, Napoleon, disguised as Lenornmand, commands his ship’s captain to change course immediately and head for France. Holm’s performance is appropriately imperious, and you can easily imagine that underlings would be terrified to receive a command like that from the emperor. But now Napoleon is living the life of a common deckhand, and the ship’s captain just laughs at him.
Later, Napoleon marshals the same charisma to inspire rather than intimidate, and succeeds in rallying a band of struggling street vendors to sell fresh fruit.
Meanwhile, on St. Helena, the false Napoleon is enjoying his captivity. It’s a prison, but it’s posh and luxurious, with fine food, beautiful art and clothing, and servants to tend to Lenormand’s needs. In character as Lenormand, Holm is boorish, gluttonous, drunk and loud. His scenes are played for low comedy.
Iben Hjejle plays the widow, whom everybody calls “Pumpkin.” She’s a Danish actor, probably best known to American audiences for appearing as John Cusack’s girlfriend in “High Fidelity.” Pumpkin is your basic romantic-comedy woman’s role; she’s an auxiliary to the man. Her job is to look beautiful and adore Napoleon (whom she knows as Lenormand). Hjeile does the job. I’d like to see her in a real role sometime.
The magic of “The Emperor’s New Clothes” is that it commits to the bit. It takes its premise seriously.
As Roger Ebert noted in a 2002 review, you can easily imagine the movie going in a broad, Monty Python direction, but instead, “The Emperor’s New Clothes” is “a surprisingly sweet and gentle comedy.”
The dialogue and acting are first-rate, and the costumes and settings are up to the standards of any historical drama.
I was intrigued by “The Emperor’s New Clothes” because of a mention the movie got on the Age of Napoleon podcast, an extremely detailed history of the life and world of Napoleon, which has been running for seven years and isn’t anywhere near done. I’ve been listening to the podcast for several years.
The host, Everett Rummage, said he thought “The Emperor’s New Clothes” was the only movie that he ever saw that truly captured Napoleon’s character. This was before the current Ridley Scott movie came out.
Having now seen “The Emperor’s New Clothes,” I can absolutely see Rummage’s point. Granted, pretty much everything I know about Napoleon comes from Rummage’s podcast. But we know that Napoleon started as a minor nobleman in Corsica, went to French military school and quickly soared through the ranks during the Revolution. Napoleon was arrogant, but he also had a common touch. He was a democrat with a small “d,” unimpressed by aristocracy and valuing talent, character, and loyalty over inherited titles. He slept on the ground with his men in battle, gave them personal attention, and they loved him. We see all these qualities in “The Emperor’s New Clothes.” When the fictional Napoleon is required to scrub decks, sleep in a barn and rub elbows with street vendors, well, we can imagine that Napoleon had experience with that kind of thing.
In reality, Napoleon was a genius. He was an enlightened ruler who swept aside the old order and instituted more egalitarian forms of government that are influential to this day. He nurtured science, scholarship and the arts.
And Napoleon was also a bloodthirsty murderer, tyrant and monster who bathed Europe in blood and re-instituted a regime of brutal slavery that Haiti still has not recovered from more than two centuries later.
We only see the good side of Napoleon in “The Emperor’s New Clothes.” His evil is dealt with in a single line of dialogue. Which is as it should be in this particular movie.
The movie is loosely based on a novel by Simon Ley, “The Death of Napoleon.” Writer Peter Hicks compares the two. Hicks says the book is “a sustained elegy on the wisdom of recognising the important things in life, such as love, happiness, modest success,” which are far more important than the “chimaeras of power and military glory.” The movie has the same theme. As Ebert says, Napoleon gradually realizes that “the best of all worlds may involve selling melons and embracing Pumpkin.”
In an afterword to a 2006 edition of the book, Leys said the movie “was both sad and funny: sad, because Napoleon was interpreted to perfection by an actor (Ian Holm) whose performance made me dream of what could have been achieved had the producer and director bothered to read the book."
Based on Hicks’s description, I think I would prefer the movie and I am not tempted to read the book.
P.S. Hugh Bonneville, who stars “Downton Abbey” as Robert Crawley, plays a supporting role in “The Emperor’s New Clothes.” I didn’t recognize him.
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ellenchain · 6 months
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Pirate AU! (I haven't watched Black Sails at all)
47 is a spy working for period-appropriate ICA organization which is really run by the British aristocracy in service to the crown. He takes out key figures which improves circumstances, albeit half of the time only temporary until the position gets filled with someone worse. He unknowingly spreads colonization around, destabilising communities.
Lucas, mercenary for hire, can't bear to live in a world where decision makers tell him what to do, especially if what to do is either be miserable or spread misery. So he steals a ship of his employer Cobb, although officially it sank, dragging the whole crew to the depths of the ocean. He repainted it and hoisted the jolly roger.
Bit by bit he starts to commit acts or piracy but with the goal of fighting against colonization. Naturally the ICA eventually gets wind of that and sends 47 out to take care of the pirate captain.
His subtle methods won't work, Lucas sees through every disguise and when getting him on land fails, 47 sneaks aboard the ship.
He thinks he's getting lucky when a British ship attacks, easy to take out Lucas in the fight. But he realizes that things don't add up and Lucas is no a merciless monster but takes care of his crew, distributes wealth around and offers to take the defeated crew on if they swear loyalty.
Lucas finds him and offers a truce. 47 will stop trying to kill him and allows Lucas to show him the world for what it really is.
The story looks optimistic at this point but of course the ICA doesn't like that 47 is compromised and sends more hitmen and Lucas bit off more than he could chew when his pirate fleet expands and he's losing control of the crew who sometimes commit atrocities because they can instead of serving his goal.
Cue drama, heartbreak, desperate fights, yelling and, if this is a true gritty pirate au, everyone dies.
omg you put so much effort into this, it sounds fantastic!
Lucas would fit the pirate role so well. Basically that's what he is a bit in canon too - I mean, he has a very strong sense of justice, but somehow also agrees with taking hostages (but not hurting them!), blowing people up (but only the bad ones!) and robbing organisations for his own military base (but only the ones doing bad things! Jobs and people attached to them are somehow irrelevant)
So yeah, he fits pretty well as a (modern) pirate 🏴‍☠️
I love 47 as a spy - the best the Crown has to offer. Diana is proud to have him. But just like in H2, she lets herself be talked to after 47 returns from Lucas' ship (and she will join them of course!)
(Let's not talk about the spicy details that Lucas probably captures 47 first and puts him in a small cell on the boat, but brings him food and water regularly and talks to him, perhaps opening his linen shirt with the tip of his sabre and watching him intently as he tells of his plans to bring down the Crown, 47 tied to the floor, letting Lucas do whatever he has in mind and - )
And I do ask to avoid everyone's death, we have H3 as a heartbreaker, that's enough 💔
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packernet · 2 years
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New Post has been published on https://www.packernet.com/blog/2022/11/17/stubborn-not-stupid/
Stubborn, not stupid
The old saying goes: “you can’t fix stupid.”  Thankfully, stupid isn’t the issue for Packers leadership. It’s their pigheaded, “head-in-the-sand” stubbornness.  Along with countless experts and analysts, we could all see needed changes and course corrections Packers leadership could have made this year. Instead, they’ve been painfully slow to act, when they’ve acted at all.
Change could have come sooner
There’s a long list of missed opportunities by Packers leadership thus far in 2022:
The defensive tactic of soft zone coverages was not effective. It also did not play to their strengths. It took until weeks 4-5 for a response.
It appeared that draft pick Zach Tom was better than both Royce Newman and Jake Hanson, both higher on the depth chart since training camp. His elevation took until October.
Against Dallas Rodgers was 9-for-11 for 158 yards when under center. The offense is more effective with Rodgers under-center, opening up play-action, than in shotgun. A serious shift to that didn’t happen until last Sunday against Dallas, It’s no coincidence that’s when they ended their losing streak.
Safety play from Darnell Savage has been below average to terrible all season. It took a 5-game losing streak before Rudy Ford, rostered since week 1, saw more playing time. Clearly, he should have seen the field sooner.
It’s was clear that Amari Rodgers should have been cut at the end of training camp. Packers leadership didn’t accept that until 10-weeks into the season. He lacked confidence fielding punts and then showed us why by fumbling 25% of them. Yes, he fumbled 1-of every-4 he fielded and didn’t lose his job until week 10! More to the point he was not explosive as a returner or good enough to get playing time on a team starving for WR’s.
Blame stubbornness 
Brian Gutekunst, Matt LaFleur and Joe Barry didn’t get these NFL positions because they were stupid. But flexibility and responsiveness are also measures of leadership talent. Recognizing a problem, accepting it and finding a solution to address it quickly is a leadership test they’ve all failed this season. Ron Wolf said more than once that the bigger mistake, is sticking with the mistake.
  Denial ain’t just a river in Egypt
Gutey was stubborn enough to think Sammy Watkins and a couple rookies were enough to address the talent vacuum at wide receiver. Apparently his stubbornness included keeping Amari Rogers longer than his performance warranted.
Joe Barry was too stubborn to see his zone defense was not working. Also, too slow to make a change and it likely cost the Packers chances to win very winnable games against the Giants, Jets and Washington. That Rudy Ford sat for weeks while Savage struggled is equally puzzling.
Matt LaFleur stubbornly gave his stubborn willful quarterback too much control over offensive direction. This offense needs a religious commitment to a running game, which contributes to a more effective passing game. The productivity of the run game leads to better pass protection and more lanes for lesser receivers and Aaron Rodgers to exploit.
The season is not lost yet. The margin of error for the Green Bay Packers is now razor-thin. At most, they can afford 1-2 losses to have any chance at a playoff spot. They cannot afford continued stubbornness to needed changes they cannot afford.
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ace-oreos · 2 years
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James B. Barnes and the Complicated Art of Being a Person Ch. 1
My first venture into Marvel fanfic cross-posted from Ao3. Post-Endgame, pre-The Falcon and the Winter Soldier era Bucky coming to terms with everything that's happened since Civil War.
Bucky Barnes has the chance to start over.
Except he isn't starting over, not really. This is more of a... a retake. A correction. A chance to pick up where he left off, back in 1945. Only the Brooklyn of the twenty-first century isn't the Brooklyn he remembers, and there's no Steve Rogers here to keep him on track. Nothing is anywhere close to how it used to be.
But there's no Winter Soldier, either. Which means Bucky might actually have a chance to make a life for himself.
Right?
Bucky wakes up a few minutes shy of seven o’clock and does his best not to think day one.
Day one of what, anyways? Rejoining society would probably be the nice way of putting it. Trying to act like a normal human would be the more accurate summary. 
A voice that sounds an awful lot like Steve reminds him that in the twenty-first century, he’s about as normal as anyone. A voice that sounds more like his own overrides and points out that normal people generally don’t have to be formally pardoned by the government of the United States for crimes committed as an unwilling weapon that spanned across decades.
He grits his teeth and swings himself out of bed. He’s got nothing better to do now that he doesn’t have to spend his days hiding from SHIELD and HYDRA and God knows who else, so he may as well try to do the thing right. 
The problem is, Bucky thinks as he slowly draws on a pair of too-stiff jeans, he doesn’t know where to begin. He has a vague memory of how this dance goes - put on a pot of coffee, open the curtains, drink some juice if you were the lucky sort who could afford that kind of thing - but he’s reasonably certain that things look a little different now that it isn’t 1945. 
But he puts the coffee on anyway. Normal. 
It isn’t all that good. He makes a mental note to buy sugar. It’s the kind of thing people these days can purchase in abundance and just have on hand. It’s a small thing to get hung up on, but it still strikes him as overly indulgent. 
This probably isn’t a normal line of thinking. He suspects things like rationing sugar is something of the past. 
(Later, he’s faintly alarmed to see that the grocery store a few blocks over offers brown and white sugar in ten pound bags, along with things masquerading as sugar that probably have a chemical content to rival his own, back when HYDRA used him as a guinea pig for all sorts of nasty cocktails.)
Bucky makes it to lunchtime without incident. Here, however, he encounters another stumbling block: choosing what to eat. He hovers between throwing something together with the simple things stocked in his fridge and braving speaking to someone over the phone for takeout. 
The whole debate takes up more than its fair share of time and leaves him feeling vaguely drained. In the end, he decides it’s simpler to wait until dinnertime. He’ll face the same issue, of course, but at least he can put it off for a few hours this way.
Pushing off something so deceptively simple is probably another mark of how poorly prepared he is to assimilate with modern society - or however the hell the SHIELD bigwigs had put it. He’s forced to admit that they’re probably not wrong on some fronts, but if they only knew what - 
It takes conscious effort to stop himself from continuing down that line of thought. He’s bought himself a few hours before he has to make any decisions, which leaves him time to… 
God, he doesn’t know. This civilian thing is harder than anyone let on. This realization only serves to aggravate him, so he spends some time pacing, trying to find an outlet for the frustration bubbling in his chest. 
This was a bad idea. The whole thing. How the fuck is he supposed to seamlessly integrate into the twenty-first century when his brain is so fucked up that it shuts down when he has to choose what he wants for lunch? 
“Fuck,” he mutters out loud. For all that he’d been desperate for any measure of freedom, he’s starting to think it isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be. 
By late afternoon the restlessness still hasn’t abated. He winds up outside, wandering aimlessly through the streets of Brooklyn. It bears little resemblance to the city that haunts his dreams. It was stupid to think it would remain the same after all these years, but he can’t help feeling that it’s another insult to injury. 
Bucky watches the people around him go about their day. He has the distinct, disconcerting sensation that he’s observing the world from afar. He’s so out of place here it’s almost laughable. Never mind the fact that he’s standing here in 2024, a little worse for the wear but not too shabby considering he was born in 1917; he hasn’t the faintest clue how to bridge the painfully obvious divide between him and… everyone else. 
He’s acquired a phone since being pardoned. Carrying a little box with its incessant chimes and chirps in his pocket is normal, according to Sam Wilson. Bucky had bought the stupid thing primarily to get Wilson to shut up about how he should take advantage of modern communication. 
Unfortunately, however, Wilson had taken this as an indication that he’s welcome to text Bucky. Regularly. Usually nothing more than a hey man, just checking in type deal, but Bucky doesn’t remember the man being designated as his personal link to the outside world.
Then again, there’s a lot Bucky doesn’t remember. 
It’s like this, he thinks in response to the normal people around him. I got taken prisoner by HYDRA - yeah, those quack terrorists you read about on your phones - which are stupid, by the way, why the fuck do you need your own computer, travel sized for your convenience - and their idea of fun was zapping my brain into scrambled shit. Oh, sorry. Too much? 
God, he’s a wreck. 
He wonders what Steve would say. Probably a reminder that none of it was his choice - an easy out Bucky doesn’t deserve - and to give it time. 
(But in the end, even Steve Rogers couldn't wait anymore.) 
He’d probably jostle Bucky’s shoulder in the way he always did when they were kids, even though his shoulders jutted out too sharply and he was a good half head shorter than Bucky. He’d been… he was irrepressible, that scrawny kid from Brooklyn.
Bucky misses him. 
It’s a pathetic understatement. Missing him would be if Steve had moved away. Maybe a few states over, nothing more, but close enough to stay in touch. Missing him would be if he went on - on vacation or something mundane like that. This is something more. Personal, heavier, emptier. 
But Bucky knows why he did it. More than anyone, Steve Rogers deserved to live the life he’d always wanted. The world could get by without Captain America. 
The same does not necessarily hold true for Bucky Barnes. In the past, if Steve was happy, he was happy. And if Bucky was happy, so was Steve. But now? Take Steve out of the equation, and Bucky is… lost. 
The watch on his wrist beeps to notify him that another hour has slid by without him noticing. He’s gotta find a way to turn that off before the sound drives him mad. 
To his dismay, it’s now 6:00. Dinnertime, by most reasonable standards. Which puts him back at square one. He’s not ready to subject himself to the stares and whispers that will inevitably accompany an excursion to a restaurant. He’s got a few rudimentary things  back home that have somehow found their way into his apartment. Sam maintains his innocence on this front.
Bucky isn’t sure he feels up to venturing into a grocery store again. Nothing had happened this morning to put him off it, but the possibility of something happening is enough to give him pause. 
Does that mean he’s a coward? Hmm. The implications of that don’t sit well at all. 
Sighing, Bucky turns toward the home that isn’t really home in a city that used to be his. Even Wakanda had felt more like home than this. They’d been kind to him, the Wakandans, despite having no reason to be. He still can’t quite wrap his head around that one, but King T’Challa had assured him that all was well. All thanks to Steve, no doubt. 
I have to repay him somehow. 
This time Bucky knows precisely what Steve would say to that. You don’t owe anyone, Buck. It’s the least I could do. ‘Cos I’m with you til - 
Well. At any rate, the least is pretty big in Bucky’s book. But that was Steve all over; give an undeserving man his life back and brush off thanks like it was an average Tuesday. He was good in an uncomplicated way that makes Bucky’s stomach twist. 
Bucky makes it back to his apartment to discover a frozen pizza sitting in his freezer among the somewhat disjointed spread provided by Sam. It’s nothing remarkable, but it’s food. Seventy percent of a dinner at least. 
He then spends several minutes trying to unwrap the stupid pizza from several layers of plastic without destroying the damn thing. God, people in this century don’t know how to manage their resources properly. He shoves it in the oven before it falls apart in his hands and slams the door shut with the acute impression that this is a physical representation of how he’s dealing with his problems. 
Normal people definitely don’t project onto shitty pizza from the neighborhood grocery. Bucky chalks it up to another defect and picks up the phone that’s been abandoned on his countertop all day. There’s a notification about some celebrity kissing another, some sort of update that apparently has to be installed, and a text sent three hours ago from Sam Wilson. 
Haven’t heard from you in a few weeks. Just wanted to make sure you’re all good. 
And above that, another text from Sam, this one two hours and forty-nine minutes old: And no, I’m not doing this because I was told to. You’re a grumpy old cyborg who likes knives a little too much, but you’re still a good guy. 
Bucky spends the next thirteen minutes typing out and erasing an appropriate response. In the end, he’s interrupted by the timer he’d set for the pizza. He hastily taps out a doing fine here and tosses his phone back onto the counter so he can stop the oven’s shrieking. 
The pizza isn’t as terrible as he expected. He eats it on a cheap plastic plate, sitting on the counter because he hasn’t gotten around to buying furniture yet. There’s no response from Sam, so he switches on the television from who-knows-where and puts on a football game without really watching it. 
As the hours tick by, restlessness is creeping in once more. Bucky debates going for a walk and seeing if he can’t find a suitable distraction, but common sense tells him that moving around this late at night would probably raise some alarms back at SHIELD. 
All in all, day one could’ve gone worse. At the very least, he hasn’t given anyone a reason to throw him in prison. But it was still painfully boring.
Give it time, he thinks, trying to emulate Steve. One step at a time. It sounds like something his mother would say, but he can’t be sure since the most he remembers of her is a hazy smile and the way she’d twist her hair into a knot to keep it out of her face.
Bucky glances at his phone one last time before settling in for the night. Nothing from Sam. 
Time, he thinks again. If today was any indication, he now has far too much on his hands. And isn’t that the greatest irony of his life. Fuck, when did things get so complicated? 
He makes it three hours before he jolts awake, sweating and breathing hard. He lays down again, staring at the ceiling until his vision goes fuzzy, and wonders just how complicated this civilian business is meant to be.
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thetimelordbatgirl · 2 years
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I'm sorry but what's going on with the chip 'n' dale movie? I kinda live under a rock so idk who Bobby Driscoll is
Honestly??? A mess, is this movie. At least to me anyway. It mostly looks like an attempt by Disney to have their own Who Framed Roger Rabbit....but in a more bragging way of how much properties Disney owns and such, and ironically failing to even keep to the idea of 2D characters being, well, 2D, because still using CGI on them....
But in reference to Bobby Driscoll: he was both the voice actor and model for Peter Pan, as a-lot of Peter's facial movements such as scrunching his nose and such, come from Bobby, who at the time, was a child actor for Disney, having been working with Disney since Song Of The South and he also played Jim Hawkins in Disney's Treasure Island. Bobby was also....essentially favored by Walt, who at one point said Bobby is the living embodiment of Walt's youth. Which...is important to note here. Cause Bobby was one of the first two actors Walt placed under contract and Walt did seem optimistic about him, but uh....despite Bobby in the same year as Peter Pan, being offered two more years with Disney....it was cancelled cause he....committed the worst crime for Disney: he hit puberty. .....That's it. He did what all of us go through at a young age, and Disney suddenly lost interest in him.
And after Disney, while he did have some roles at least as he went into adult years and even had a family briefly, he sadly started drugs during his time in public school and was actually arrested in 1956 due to possession of marijuana, but the charge was dismissed, but in 1961, was imprisoned for drug related charges and by the time he got out in 1962, he was unable to find acting work, and when speaking on this, he said: "I have found that memories are not very useful. I was carried on a silver platter- and then dumped into the garbage." Which...REALLY sums up how Disney treated him. Again, I can't go into detail here about his home life, but Disney was like a family to him when his home life was bad and Walt was said to favor him a-lot. And what was their response when he did what any child does with puberty??? They threw him out, while still making money off him when it came to Peter Pan and Treasure Island even.
And while he did eventually relocate to New York in 1965 after his parole expired in hopes of reviving his career on broad-way, this was unsuccessful, and he eventually became apart of an art community called The Factory, and his last known performance was in an underground film called The Dirt. And...sadly on the 30th of March 1938, two boys while playing, discovered his body in a cot with two empty beer bottles and religious pamphlets all over the ground, and a post mortem determined he had died from heart failure caused by an advanced atherosclerosis from drug use. He was only 31 when he died. Sadly, at the time, his body went unidentified and his unclaimed body was buried in an unmarked pauper's grave on Hart Island, and only in 1969 due to his mother seeking help from Disney to find Bobby for a reunion as his father was nearing death, did they find out what happened to Bobby due to a fingerprint match, and while Bobby's name is on his father's gravestone, his remains are still in the unmarked grave, and his death was only reported on in 1971 due to Song of The South's re-release as reporters researched for the star of the films whereabouts.
And of course, Disney still made money off him through Peter Pan and Treasure Island, while refusing to acknowledge him as a Disney Legend.
So, lets go back to Chip 'N Dale...this is Peter Pan/Mean Dean in the film:
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....Yeah....uh....keep in mind: this is obviously taking the model that was done after Bobby and doing....all this to it, while making him pretty cynical and in the new tv spot in particular, insulting his now grown up appearance and everything. And like, while yes, OUAT did a villain Peter Pan as well....that one seemed to be more inspired by the original tale of Peter and Wendy's Peter, not Bobby Driscoll's Peter Pan. Whereas....yeah, this is basically a what the fuck thing to do with Peter Pan.
Again, it really is hard to tell what Disney is doing here. Is he a commentary on Child Stars maybe?? Well, that'd be bold of Disney and a fucking middle finger to Bobby, given what Disney did to him. It could also be just a villain move, but either way, its not great. Its gross as hell. Even if its not you know, the actual Peter Pan cause again, people say its Mean Dean, its still taking Bobby's likeness a little and doing that to it, so uh....yeah, I'm not gonna lie, this is putting me off the movie a-lot.
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babyjakes · 2 years
Text
forever and a day | 26. team meeting.
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summary | a story in which america’s favorite captain gives a new life and family to a five-year-old girl who has suffered well beyond her years at the hands of hydra.
characters | dad!steve rogers, girl/willa rogers (original character)
warnings | AU similar enough to OU to include spoilers to many Marvel movies (Age of Ultron and beyond). action and fight scenes with violence and killing. injuries/mild gore. mature themes related to and semi-graphic depictions of child abuse/neglect, past CSA and CSM, and their aftermath (emaciation, wounds, scarring, etc). medical abuse and experimentation. ptsd/trauma symptoms in a child (developmental discrepancies, de-humanized behavior, detachment, extreme fears). medical treatment of CSM and other aftermath of abuse.trauma-informed therapeutic treatment of ECT. somewhat evil!Tony Stark (eventually).
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[Steve]
Parenting alongside Tony Stark is proving to be much more difficult than I had originally anticipated.
I mean, sure. When he revealed that he wanted to sign on as Willa’s second guardian, I was immediately skeptical. Of course I was. But the way he treated her with such care when we first rescued her really had me convinced that this was all going to work out relatively smoothly. Now, I’m not so sure.
The first real indicator that things might be going south was when Tony got upset with Willa after she was shot at the safe-house and hid it from all of us. I wasn’t in the room when it happened, nor did I hear his comments to Bruce after, but the doctor let me know that he was very concerned, and when I tried to bring the incident up with Tony later, he didn’t want to talk about it.
Then, there was a period of a few days where Tony just didn’t see Willa much at all. Bruce didn’t want him talking to the child alone, and Tony felt insulted that we would suggest he be ‘supervised’ during his visits. While I understood his frustration, at least, to a certain degree, I don’t think the best decision was to ultimately ignore the girl completely.
And then, when the child was finally able to leave her bed more and be out in the common space with the rest of us for the majority of her day, Tony began to display even more questionable behavior, which thankfully the five-year-old was mostly oblivious to; the scientist would just disapprove of various things and express his concerns to me. He still didn’t like the pacifiers. He thought I was too “soft” with her, as he put it. He thought she got too much attention from everyone, in general. He didn’t like that we prepared separate meals for her. He didn’t like the way the little girl acted; he said we were babying her and therefore she was acting like a baby. Which Bruce has had very strong things to say about, on the contrary to Tony’s ignorant opinion. He just doesn’t seem to be grasping the fact that Willa is hurting. She’s been hurting her whole life, and even though she’s safe from her captors, she’s still going to carry that hurt with her wherever she goes.
A few instances have ultimately escalated to where Willa has been exposed to his bad parenting, and each time, I’ve had to remove her from the situation while Bruce or someone else talked Tony down. At this point, it’s clear to me that this is no environment for the child to be living in. Tony has no right to make things difficult for her like this.
Things have been so difficult, in fact, that Bruce has decided to call a team meeting for all of the fiftieth-floor residents to discuss concerns for how we’re going to continue raising Willa collectively. While Tony and I carry the responsibility of her guardianship together, the rest have agreed that Willa is going to be a group project. Peter is the only one missing from the bunch; he’s up watching the girl while the rest of us, the adults, meet.
That’s how we all ended up in this stuffy conference room on the forty-somethingth floor, sitting around a long oval table in cheap rolling chairs. Bruce is at the head, since he is the one who called for the meeting. To his right are Tony, Nat, and Thor. To Bruce’s left, I sit across from Tony, followed by Wanda, who’s across from Nat, and Clint, who’s across from Thor. Bruce brought his notepad, but other than that, we’re all empty-handed. Tony attempted to bring down a little science gadget to mess around with, but Bruce scolded him, reminding him that this is a serious matter.
“So,” Stark clears his throat, breaking the awkward silence. “Are we gonna do anything in this meeting, or what? 'Cause I got a whole bunch of stuff I gotta work on back in the lab, and I’m really starting to think that maybe this is a waste of my-”
“Alright,” Bruce cuts him off as a few faces around the room roll their eyes at Tony’s impatience. “We’ll get started, then. I was just going over my notes to make sure I have everything written down that we need to cover.”
“Notes schmotes,” Tony dismisses, “you’re way too fussy about these kinds of things, Banner. I wish you’d learn the art of 'winging it.’”
“Is that what you decided to do when you committed to raising a child?” Nat asks under her breath. I cough slightly, the sudden jab catching me off guard. The spy looks at the man next to her intensely, not a hint of humor showing on her face.
“Jesus,” Tony breathes out, “tough crowd. I had a bad feeling about this, and you know what, if this is just going to be a writing session for Mr. Genius Billionaire Playboy Philanthropist’s diss track, then I would much rather be-”
“Enough,” Bruce interjects once more. “You were the one who wanted to get started, so let’s go,” he presses, his voice slightly raised in anger. I glance over a little bit to my left to see Wanda’s face looking unmistakably worried. Beyond her, Clint is rubbing his temples, clearly agitated by the genius billion-whatever. “The first thing I want to do is go around the room and let everybody say how they’ve felt the past few weeks have gone with Willa in our care. If you have any concerns or issues you want to bring up, now would be the time to do so. How about we start with Thor,” Bruce suggests, his eyes landing over on the Asgardian.
“Oh, great. So now this is group therapy,” Tony huffs, causing me to glare at him silently.
“Alright, as you wish,” Thor agrees. “As you all know, I have been in and out over the span of the tiny human’s stay. I fear I do not have much to contribute to this conversation, but I will say that I’ve noticed Captain carrying the majority of the burden in terms of caring for the child. In fact, I completely forgot that Tony had guardianship as well, until recently, when the man of spiders reminded me. I, for one, question the man of iron’s ability to care for the girl- or really, to care for anyone other than himself. That is all,” he finishes. Tony rolls his eyes.
“He’s an alien; his opinion doesn’t count,” the dark-haired man interjects.
“Shut up, Stark,” Clint groans, “I’ll go next.” The eyes in the room shift to the archer as he lets out a deep sigh before beginning. “I have a lot of concerns about the way Willa’s currently being raised. I think Steve’s doing a great job, as great as he can, but yeah; I agree with Thor. Tony’s clearly not stepping up to the plate and doing his part. His terrible attitude doesn’t help,” he notes, nodding at Tony, who frowns in response. “I don’t know if Willa’s got any idea that Tony’s supposed to be caring for her, too, but I do know that she’s picking up on Tony’s unfriendly nature. The other day, she asked me, 'Why does the scary guy with the glasses hate Willa?’ And that isn’t healthy for her. Whether or not she knows who Tony’s supposed to be.” I sigh, looking down at my lap. I wasn’t aware that she had asked Clint that; it breaks my heart that she’s able to pick up on Tony’s cold disposition.
“I never said anything about hating her; of course I don’t,” the man tries to defend.
“That doesn’t matter,” Bruce shakes his head. “With kids, it’s not so much about intention. The only thing that’s important is how you make them feel.”
“How am I supposed to control her feelings?” Tony whines.
“I’m next,” Wanda speaks up, ignoring his comment as she sits up slightly in her seat from her previous slouched position. “I’ve loved having Willa here. Even though it’s hard to witness what she’s been through, I think that she really brightens our lives, all of us. Even if we don’t notice it all the time. I personally have felt like I’m doing something greater, even greater than being an Avenger, by just being her friend. I know Peter feels the same,” she says, a hopeful smile on her face. When her gaze connects with mine, I send a smile back at her, her eyes sparkling with affection. “I agree with Thor and Clint,” the girl then continues. “Stark is having an adverse effect on Willa’s recovery. I’ve sat with her several times and tapped into her dreams; they’re all nightmares,” she discloses, causing my heart to ache in my chest. “A good portion of them are back at Hydra. There’s a jumble of other things and people she knows mixed in, too. But second to her time in captivity, her dreams are mostly about Stark. He rejects her, hurts her. Rips her out of Steve’s loving arms. Throws her away. And I believe it’s a direct result of how you’ve treated her,” Wanda accuses, her gaze rising up to meet Tony’s with a hint of crimson anger flickering in her eyes.
“That’s just absurd,” the scientist fires back, “how the hell am I supposed to control what she has nightmares about?”
Rolling her eyes, the girl beside me seethes, “Don’t you find it even a little concerning that you’re so relevant in her terrible array of dreams?
Tony scowls at her, opening his mouth to say something more, but Natasha stops him by jutting in, "Alright. I’m gonna go now. Tony, keep your mouth shut,” she instructs. He huffs at the spy, but thankfully obeys. “I agree with everything Wanda had to say; having Willa here is great. It’s especially endearing to see Steve thriving in a position we’ve all teased him needing to take for so long,” the redhead adds, winking at me. I smirk back at her, appreciating her subtle attempt to lighten the mood. “Obviously Stark’s not doing the whole parenting thing right. I mean, I can’t say I’m surprised. Just disappointed, I guess. If he doesn’t get his act together, I don’t know why he would have to keep guardianship. Steve seems completely capable of doing the job himself. And if he wants someone to co-parent with him, I can bet I’m not the only one in this room who’d be willing to step up to the plate.”
“And what makes you think you can just take my guardianship away?” Tony questions, his voice dripping with sickening arrogance.
“We can ask you to step down,” Clint suggests. “That would be the easiest way, wouldn’t it?”
“And what if I say no?” Tony challenges.
“We can always get in touch with whoever you were working with from Child Services. If you really want to get that messy about it,” Nat threatens.
“Guys, come on,” Bruce interjects. “I know we’re all frustrated with Tony; I’ll be the first one to say that his behavior is completely unacceptable. But we want to aim for growth, for change. Not for involving the authorities again.”
“You think Tony Stark is going to change?” Wanda mutters.
Bruce sighs, running a hand through his hair, clearly not coming up with an answer. Turning back to Tony, a pained look appears on the doctor’s face. “Look, Tony… we’re just bringing these things up to you because we’re worried. We don’t want things to get any worse for Willa, or for you. Ultimately, these guys are right. If you keep having such a negative effect on her, it would be wrong of us to not do something to try and keep her safe.”
“Keep her safe? Keep her safe?” Tony raises his voice, a look of pure rage appearing on his face. “Do I have to remind you that this is coming from a guy who literally turns into a big green monster when he loses his cool?” Bruce’s face hardens at his friend’s petty jab, but Tony just keeps going. “Look, I get that I’m not a super soft cuddle buddy like Steve, but that’s the point! You guys are treating this kid like she’s two! She’s five years old, for christ’s sake! She doesn’t need binkies and sippy-cups and to be carried around everywhere! It’s pathetic! She’s pathetic” he exclaims. “And I’m the only one who seems to get that! She’s been with us for how long, and she’s not even in school yet?”
“Tony, she’s five,” Clint sighs. “Kindergartendoesn’t even start until six.”
“Well, she needs some sort of education,” Tony retorts. “She may be five, but she acts stupider than a fucking box of rocks.”
“Tony,” Nat seethes, looking as if she’s about to go off completely on the man.
“Steve,” Wanda’s soft voice cuts through the chaos. “You haven’t said anything this entire time.” Glancing up, I see that everyone in the room is now looking at me. “Do you want to give your side of the story? How you’ve felt since Willa arrived?”
Taking a deep breath, I nod slowly. “Sure,” I agree, “I was just waiting for everyone else to go.” I feel a lump forming in my throat, but force it down. Now definitely wouldn’t be the time to fall apart, not in front of everybody. “Being with Willa has been… the greatest joy of my life,” I breathe, doing my best to keep from tearing up. “Maybe even greater than loving Peggy, or rescuing Bucky’s division during the war, or winning any fight we’ve faced as a team. And even though I thought originally that Tony and I were going to do this together, I’ve been alright just doing it on my own,” I admit, feeling more sure of myself than ever. “I don’t want Tony to lose guardianship. I believe in him and his ability to grow into a better parent. But the harm he’s causing Willa can’t go on. And if it does, I won’t stop at anything to protect her.” Looking around at my friends again, I see their expressions shifting to ones of respect. Then, my eyes land on Tony. And he’s absolutely fuming.
“I have just as much of a right to fight for what I think is best for her as you do,” the man growls.
“Yes, you do,” I agree with him evenly. “But I think it’s clear who would win that fight, just based on the other opinions in this room, alone.”
“Oh,” Wanda raises her hand, once again breaking through the tension. “I forgot to mention this, I’m sorry. Is it okay to bring something else up?” she asks, looking at Bruce.
Banner nods, and the girl sighs in relief. Tony glares at me, as if to say, 'This isn’t over.’
“I think that Willa’s powers might extend beyond her healing capabilities,” Wanda discloses. “A few times when I’ve read her dreams, I’ve been able to continue looking into her mind once she’s woken up.”
“Can’t you do that with everyone?” Nat asks.
“Yes, but when it happened with Willa, I had closed the door into her mind as soon as she woke up. It was almost as if… she had her own door that was open.” This new idea hits the group hard, and it’s quiet for several moments, all of us taking a second to process what Wanda’s shared.
“You know what, I think I might’ve experienced that, too,” Clint mentions, appearing a little lost in thought, as if he’s still putting the pieces together as he speaks. “Just as we were about to arrive back at the tower, after the incident at the safe-house. She started having a flashback of what happened, and I could instantly tell what it was. It was weird… like, it wasn’t just that I knew. I could actually see it all, myself.”
“So, she has some sort of mind-channeling complex, like Wanda,” Bruce thinks aloud. “Have you noticed anything else?”
“When I sit in on her dreams, sometimes I can open my eyes and still receive the information. Usually, I’ve looked and the glow around her has been red. But other times, it’s been different colors. I don’t know what they mean, but the energy source definitely isn’t mine.”
“You’re saying she’s a witch like you?” Thor speaks up.
“I have no idea,” Wanda shakes her head sadly. “I have a feeling that more abilities could pop up as she grows. If she was born with them, we have no idea how long they could take to show.”
“Okay, so… a weird mutant kid showing signs of emerging powers? Alright, that’s easy; we run tests on her,” Tony cuts in, “set her up in the lab. I don’t have machines that can run anything too crazy, but we could at least get started on her brain, maybe her blood, too. Hey Jarvis?” he calls.
“Yes sir,” the AI responds.
“Start running Project 24,” the scientist instructs. He looks back at all of us, who are startled by his sudden burst of inspiration. “I’ve been working on programs to analyze Hydra’s experiments for quite some time now. I wasn’t granted any access to the other prisoners we found in Seoul, but-”
“Woah, woah, woah, hang on a second,” Bruce finally intervenes. Every face in the room besides Tony’s is painted with worry. “We are not going to use her for one of your- your projects. You were denied access to the others for a reason.”
“What do you mean, we’re not? I’m not saying any of you have to get involved, but the more hands on deck, the quicker we can figure out the kind of power she possesses. This could be a breakthrough into Hydra’s research,” Tony tries, but none of us are on board.
“Tony, we just rescued her from a group of evil scientists who used her as a living experiment,” Natasha reasons. “And now you want to throw her back in a lab and experiment on her some more?”
“This could throw us light-years ahead of Hydra in terms of science,” the stubborn man argues. “They do the mutating, but no one over there is smart enough to make sense of any of it. That’s where I come in,” he smirks. I feel heat rising in my cheeks, but swallow down my anger, knowing that an outburst wouldn’t be the best choice in this situation.
“Absolutely not,” I declare firmly, not willing to negotiate the subject. “We promised her we were saving her from her life of experimentation. She’s our child, Tony. Not our science project.” Tony stares directly back at me, rage glowing in his eyes.
“I don’t think you’re quite understanding the gravity of the situation at hand, Spangles. This could be it; she could be our tool to overpowering Hydra. Don’t you want that, Steve? An end to their torturous ways?” Tony spits.
“Not if it means torturing an innocent child in the process,” I maintain, not willing to be swayed by him at all.
“This is why I don’t think you should have guardianship,” Clint interjects. “She’s an object to you, something you now want to use for your own personal gain. You want to be the one who cracks the code, who outsmarts Hydra, I get it. But come on, Tony. You referred to the girl you adopted as a 'tool.’” Tony turns to him angrily, about to say something in response, but just as he opens his mouth, there’s a knock at the door.
As we all turn our attention to the source of the sound, there’s another round of knocking before the door opens slowly, revealing a panicked-looking Peter, carrying a rosy-cheeked Willa who’s wailing loudly into the boy’s shoulder.
“C-Cap? Mr. Stark? Sorry, I-I should’ve waited after I knocked, but I-” as he’s talking, the child squirms out of the boy’s arms, landing on the ground and running directly over to me, ducking under the table when it’s briefly in her way. Willa crashes into my legs, letting out a sob.
“Hey, sweetheart, what’s the matter?” I instantly hush, my entire demeanor shifting from tense and rigid to gentle and concerned. The girl crawls up onto my lap and burrows her way under my shirt, pressing up against my bare chest.
“What’s going on?” I hear Nat asking Peter, but before he even has a chance to answer, I already see it as I look down at the trembling child being covered by the soft white fabric.
Beneath the loose shirt, the small girl’s body is glowing blue.
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chrisevansluv · 3 years
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Here is the 2012 Detail Magazine interview with chris evans:
The Avengers' Chris Evans: Just Your Average Beer-Swilling, Babe-Loving Buddhist
The 30-year-old Bud Light-chugging, Beantown-bred star of The Avengers is widely perceived as the ultimate guy's guy. But beneath the bro persona lies a serious student of Buddhism, an unrepentant song-and-dance man, and a guy who talks to his mom about sex. And farts.
By Adam Sachs,
Photographs by Norman Jean Roy
May 2012 Issue
"Should we just kill him and bury his body?" Chris Evans is stage whispering into the impassive blinking light of my digital recorder.
"Chris!" shouts his mother, her tone a familiar-to-anyone-with-a-mother mix of coddling and concern. "Don't say that! What if something happened?"
We're at Evans' apartment, an expansive but not overly tricked-out bachelor-pad-ish loft in a semi-industrial nowheresville part of Boston, hard by Chinatown, near an area sometimes called the Combat Zone. Evans has a fuzzy, floppy, slept-in-his-clothes aspect that'd be nearly unrecognizable if you knew him only by the upright, spit-polished bearing of the onscreen hero. His dog, East, a sweet and slobbery American bulldog, is spread out on a couch in front of the TV. The shelves of his fridge are neatly stacked with much of the world's supply of Bud Light in cans and little else.
On the counter sit a few buckets of muscle-making whey-protein powder that belong to Evans' roommate, Zach Jarvis, an old pal who sometimes tags along on set as a paid "assistant" and a personal trainer who bulked Evans up for his role as the super-ripped patriot in last summer's blockbuster Captain America: The First Avenger. A giant clock on the exposed-brick wall says it's early evening, but Evans operates on his own sense of time. Between gigs, his schedule's all his, which usually translates into long stretches of alone time during the day and longer social nights for the 30-year-old.
"I could just make this . . . disappear," says Josh Peck, another old pal and occasional on-set assistant, in a deadpan mumble, poking at the voice recorder I'd left on the table while I was in the bathroom.
Evans' mom, Lisa, now speaks directly into the microphone: "Don't listen to them—I'm trying to get them not to say these things!"
But not saying things isn't in the Evans DNA. They're an infectiously gregarious clan. Irish-Italians, proud Bostoners, close-knit, and innately theatrical. "We all act, we sing," Evans says. "It was like the fucking von Trapps." Mom was a dancer and now runs a children's theater. First-born Carly directed the family puppet shows and studied theater at NYU. Younger brother Scott has parts on One Life to Live and Law & Order under his belt and lives in Los Angeles full-time—something Evans stopped doing several years back. Rounding out the circle are baby sister Shanna and a pair of "strays" the family brought into their Sudbury, Massachusetts, home: Josh, who went from mowing the lawn to moving in when his folks relocated during his senior year in high school; and Demery, who was Evans' roommate until recently.
"Our house was like a hotel," Evans says. "It was a loony-tunes household. If you got arrested in high school, everyone knew: 'Call Mrs. Evans, she'll bail you out.'"
Growing up, they had a special floor put in the basement where all the kids practiced tap-dancing. The party-ready rec room also had a Ping-Pong table and a separate entrance. This was the house kids in the neighborhood wanted to hang at, and this was the kind of family you wanted to be adopted by. Spend an afternoon listening to them dish old dirt and talk over each other and it's easy to see why. Now they're worried they've said too much, laid bare the tender soul of the actor behind the star-spangled superhero outfit, so there's talk of offing the interviewer. I can hear all this from the bathroom, which, of course, is the point of a good stage whisper.
To be sure, no one's said too much, and the more you're brought into the embrace of this boisterous, funny, shit-slinging, demonstrably loving extended family, the more likable and enviable the whole dynamic is.
Sample exchange from today's lunch of baked ziti at a family-style Italian restaurant:
Mom: When he was a kid, he asked me, 'Mom, will I ever think farting isn't funny?'
Chris: You're throwing me under the bus, Ma! Thank you.
Mom: Well, if a dog farts you still find it funny.
Then, back at the apartment, where Mrs. Evans tries to give me good-natured dirt on her son without freaking him out:
Mom: You always tell me when you think a girl is attractive. You'll call me up so excited. Is that okay to say?
Chris: Nothing wrong with that.
Mom: And can I say all the girls you've brought to the house have been very sweet and wonderful? Of course, those are the ones that make it to the house. It's been a long time, hasn't it?
Chris: Looooong time.
Mom: The last one at our house? Was it six years ago?
Chris: No names, Ma!
Mom: But she knocked it out of the park.
Chris: She got drunk and puked at Auntie Pam's house! And she puked on the way home and she puked at our place.
Mom: And that's when I fell in love with her. Because she was real.
We're operating under a no-names rule, so I'm not asking if it's Jessica Biel who made this memorable first impression. She and Evans were serious for a couple of years. But I don't want to picture lovely Jessica Biel getting sick at Auntie Pam's or in the car or, really, anywhere.
East the bulldog ambles over to the table, begging for food.
"That dog is the love of his life," Mrs. Evans says. "Which tells me he'll be an unbelievable parent, but I don't want him to get married right now." She turns to Chris. "The way you are, I just don't think you're ready."
Some other things I learn about Evans from his mom: He hates going to the gym; he was so wound-up as a kid she'd let him stand during dinner, his legs shaking like caged greyhounds; he suffered weekly "Sunday-night meltdowns" over schoolwork and the angst of the sensitive middle-schooler; after she and his father split and he was making money from acting, he bought her the Sudbury family homestead rather than let her leave it.
Eventually his mom and Josh depart, and Evans and I go to work depleting his stash of Bud Light. It feels like we drink Bud Light and talk for days, because we basically do. I arrived early Friday evening; it's Saturday night now and it'll be sunup Sunday before I sleeplessly make my way to catch a train back to New York City. Somewhere in between we slip free of the gravitational pull of the bachelor pad and there's bottle service at a club and a long walk with entourage in tow back to Evans' apartment, where there is some earnest-yet-surreal group singing, piano playing, and chitchat. Evans is fun to talk to, partly because he's an open, self-mocking guy with an explosive laugh and no apparent need to sleep, and partly because when you cut just below the surface, it's clear he's not quite the dude's dude he sometimes plays onscreen and in TV appearances.
From a distance, Chris Evans the movie star seems a predictable, nearly inevitable piece of successful Hollywood packaging come to market. There's his major-release debut as the dorkily unaware jock Jake in the guilty pleasure Not Another Teen Movie (in one memorable scene, Evans has whipped cream on his chest and a banana up his ass). The female-friendly hunk appeal—his character in The Nanny Diaries is named simply Harvard Hottie—is balanced by a kind of casual-Friday, I'm-from-Boston regular-dudeness. Following the siren song of comic-book cash, he was the Human Torch in two Fantastic Four films. As with scrawny Steve Rogers, the Captain America suit beefed up his stature as a formidable screen presence, a bankable leading man, all of which leads us to The Avengers, this season's megabudget, megawatt ensemble in which he stars alongside Scarlett Johansson, Mark Ruffalo, Robert Downey Jr., and Chris Hemsworth.
It all feels inevitable—and yet it nearly didn't happen. Evans repeatedly turned down the Captain America role, fearing he'd be locked into what was originally a nine-picture deal. He was shooting Puncture, about a drug-addicted lawyer, at the time. Most actors doing small-budget legal dramas would jump at the chance to play the lead in a Marvel franchise, but Evans saw a decade of his life flash before his eyes.
What he remembers thinking is this: "What if the movie comes out and it's a success and I just reject all of this? What if I want to move to the fucking woods?"
By "the woods," he doesn't mean a quiet life away from the spotlight, some general metaphorical life escape route. He means the actual woods. "For a long time all I wanted for Christmas were books about outdoor survival," he says. "I was convinced that I was going to move to the woods. I camped a lot, I took classes. At 18, I told myself if I don't live in the woods by the time I'm 25, I have failed."
Evans has described his hesitation at signing on for Captain America. Usually he talks about the time commitment, the loss of what remained of his relative anonymity. On the junkets for the movie, he was open about needing therapy after the studio reduced the deal to six movies and he took the leap. What he doesn't usually mention is that he was racked with anxiety before the job came up.
"I get very nervous," Evans explains. "I shit the bed if I have to present something on stage or if I'm doing press. Because it's just you." He's been known to walk out of press conferences, to freeze up and go silent during the kind of relaxed-yet-high-stakes meetings an actor of his stature is expected to attend: "Do you know how badly I audition? Fifty percent of the time I have to walk out of the room. I'm naturally very pale, so I turn red and sweat. And I have to literally walk out. Sometimes mid-audition. You start having these conversations in your brain. 'Chris, don't do this. Chris, take it easy. You're just sitting in a room with a person saying some words, this isn't life. And you're letting this affect you? Shame on you.'"
Shades of "Sunday-night meltdowns." Luckily the nerves never follow him to the set. "You do your neuroses beforehand, so when they yell 'Action' you can be present," he says.
Okay, there was one on-set panic attack—while Evans was shooting Puncture. "We were getting ready to do a court scene in front of a bunch of people, and I don't know what happened," he says. "It's just your brain playing games with you. 'Hey, you know how we sometimes freak out? What if we did it right now?'"
One of the people who advised Evans to take the Captain America role was his eventual Avengers costar Robert Downey Jr. "I'd seen him around," Downey says. "We share an agent. I like to spend a lot of my free time talking to my agent about his other clients—I just had a feeling about him."
What he told Evans was: This puppy is going to be big, and when it is you're going to get to make the movies you want to make. "In the marathon obstacle course of a career," Downey says, "it's just good to have all the stats on paper for why you're not only a team player but also why it makes sense to support you in the projects you want to do—because you've made so much damned money for the studio."
There's also the fact that Evans had a chance to sign on for something likely to be a kind of watershed moment in the comic-book fascination of our time. "I do think The Avengers is the crescendo of this superhero phase in entertainment—except of course for Iron Man 3," Downey says. "It'll take a lot of innovation to keep it alive after this."
Captain America is the only person left who was truly close to Howard Stark, father of Tony Stark (a.k.a. Iron Man), which meant that Evans' and Downey's story lines are closely linked, and in the course of doing a lot of scenes together, they got to be pals. Downey diagnoses his friend with what he terms "low-grade red-carpet anxiety disorder."
"He just hates the game-show aspect of doing PR," Downey says. "Obviously there's pressure for anyone in this transition he's in. But he will easily triple that pressure to make sure he's not being lazy. That's why I respect the guy. I wouldn't necessarily want to be in his skin. But his motives are pure. He just needs to drink some red-carpet chamomile."
"The majority of the world is empty space," Chris Evans says, watching me as if my brain might explode on hearing this news—or like he might have to fight me if I try to contradict him. We're back at his apartment after a cigarette run through the Combat Zone.
"Empty space!" he says again, slapping the table and sort of yelling. Then, in a slow, breathy whisper, he repeats: "Empty space, empty space. All that we see in the world, the life, the animals, plants, people, it's all empty space. That's amazing!" He slaps the table again. "You want another beer? Gotta be Bud Light. Get dirty—you're in Boston. Okay, organize your thoughts. I gotta take a piss . . ."
My thoughts are this: That this guy who is hugging his dog and talking to me about space and mortality and the trouble with Boston girls who believe crazy gossip about him—this is not the guy I expected to meet. I figured he'd be a meatball. Though, truthfully, I'd never called anyone a meatball until Evans turned me on to the put-down. As in: "My sister Shanna dates meatballs." And, more to the point: "When I do interviews, I'd rather just be the beer-drinking dude from Boston and not get into the complex shit, because I don't want every meatball saying, 'So hey, whaddyathink about Buddhism?'"
At 17, Evans came across a copy of Hermann Hesse's Siddhartha and began his spiritual questing. It's a path of study and struggle that, he says, defines his true purpose in life. "I love acting. It's my playground, it lets me explore. But my happiness in this world, my level of peace, is never going to be dictated by acting," he says. "My goal in life is to detach from the egoic mind. Do you know anything about Eastern philosophy?"
I sip some Bud Light and shake my head sheepishly. "They talk about the egoic mind, the part of you that's self-aware, the watcher, the person you think is driving this machine," he says. "And that separation from self and mind is the root of suffering. There are ways of retraining the way you think. This isn't really supported in Western society, which is focused on 'Go get it, earn it, win it, marry it.'"
Scarlett Johansson says that one of the things she appreciates about Evans is how he steers clear of industry chat when they see each other. "Basically every actor," she says, "including myself, when we finish a job we're like, 'Well, that's it for me. Had a good run. Put me out to pasture.' But Chris doesn't strike me as someone who frets about the next job." The two met on the set of The Perfect Score when they were teenagers and have stayed close; The Avengers is their third movie together. "He has this obviously masculine presence—a dude's dude—and we're used to seeing him play heroic characters," Johansson says, "but he's also surprisingly sensitive. He has close female friends, and you can talk to him about anything. Plus there's that secret song-and-dance, jazz-hands side of Chris. I feel like he grew up with the Partridge Family. He'd be just as happy doing Guys and Dolls as he would Captain America 2."
East needs to do his business, so Evans and I take him up to the roof deck. Evans bought this apartment in 2010 when living in L.A. full-time no longer appealed to him. He came back to stay close to his extended family and the intimate circle of Boston pals he's maintained since high school. The move also seems like a pretty clear keep-it-real hedge against the manic ego-stroking distractions of Hollywood.
"I think my daytime person is different than my nighttime person," Evans says. "With my high-school buddies, we drink beer and talk sports and it's great. The kids in my Buddhism class in L.A., they're wildly intelligent, and I love being around them, but they're not talking about the Celtics. And that's part of me. It's a strange dichotomy. I don't mind being a certain way with some people and having this other piece of me that's just for me."
I asked Downey about Evans' outward regular-Joe persona. "It's complete horseshit," Downey says. "There's an inherent street-smart intelligence there. I don't think he tries to hide it. But he's much more evolved and much more culturally aware than he lets on."
Perhaps the meatball and the meditation can coexist. We argue about our egoic brains and the tao of Boston girls. "I love wet hair and sweatpants," he says in their defense. "I like sneakers and ponytails. I like girls who aren't so la-di-da. L.A. is so la-di-da. I like Boston girls who shit on me. Not literally. Girls who give me a hard time, bust my chops a little."
The chief buster of Evans' chops is, of course, Evans himself. "The problem is, the brain I'm using to dissect this world is a brain formed by it," he says. "We're born into confusion, and we get the blessing of letting go of it." Then he adds: "I think this shit by day. And then night comes and it's like, 'Fuck it, let's drink.'"
And so we do. It's getting late. Again. We should have eaten dinner, but Evans sometimes forgets to eat: "If I could just take a pill to make me full forever, I wouldn't think twice."
We talk about his dog and camping with his dog and why he loves being alone more than almost anything except maybe not being alone. "I swear to God, if you saw me when I am by myself in the woods, I'm a lunatic," he says. "I sing, I dance. I do crazy shit."
Evans' unflagging, all-encompassing enthusiasm is impressive, itself a kind of social intelligence. "If you want to have a good conversation with him, don't talk about the fact that he's famous" was the advice I got from Mark Kassen, who codirected Puncture. "He's a blast, a guy who can hang. For quite a long time. Many hours in a row."
I've stopped looking at the clock. We've stopped talking philosophy and moved into more emotional territory. He asks questions about my 9-month-old son, and then Captain America gets teary when I talk about the wonder of his birth. "I weep at everything," he says. "I emote. I love things so much—I just never want to dilute that."
He talks about how close he feels to his family, how open they all are with each other. About everything. All the time. "The first time I had sex," he says, "I raced home and was like, 'Mom, I just had sex! Where's the clit?'"
Wait, I ask—did she ever tell you?
"Still don't know where it is, man," he says, then breaks into a smile composed of equal parts shit-eating grin and inner peace. "I just don't know. Make some movies, you don't have to know…"
Here is the 2012 Detail Magazine interview with chris evans:
The Avengers' Chris Evans: Just Your Average Beer-Swilling, Babe-Loving Buddhist
The 30-year-old Bud Light-chugging, Beantown-bred star of The Avengers is widely perceived as the ultimate guy's guy. But beneath the bro persona lies a serious student of Buddhism, an unrepentant song-and-dance man, and a guy who talks to his mom about sex. And farts.
By Adam Sachs,
Photographs by Norman Jean Roy
May 2012 Issue
"Should we just kill him and bury his body?" Chris Evans is stage whispering into the impassive blinking light of my digital recorder.
"Chris!" shouts his mother, her tone a familiar-to-anyone-with-a-mother mix of coddling and concern. "Don't say that! What if something happened?"
We're at Evans' apartment, an expansive but not overly tricked-out bachelor-pad-ish loft in a semi-industrial nowheresville part of Boston, hard by Chinatown, near an area sometimes called the Combat Zone. Evans has a fuzzy, floppy, slept-in-his-clothes aspect that'd be nearly unrecognizable if you knew him only by the upright, spit-polished bearing of the onscreen hero. His dog, East, a sweet and slobbery American bulldog, is spread out on a couch in front of the TV. The shelves of his fridge are neatly stacked with much of the world's supply of Bud Light in cans and little else.
On the counter sit a few buckets of muscle-making whey-protein powder that belong to Evans' roommate, Zach Jarvis, an old pal who sometimes tags along on set as a paid "assistant" and a personal trainer who bulked Evans up for his role as the super-ripped patriot in last summer's blockbuster Captain America: The First Avenger. A giant clock on the exposed-brick wall says it's early evening, but Evans operates on his own sense of time. Between gigs, his schedule's all his, which usually translates into long stretches of alone time during the day and longer social nights for the 30-year-old.
"I could just make this . . . disappear," says Josh Peck, another old pal and occasional on-set assistant, in a deadpan mumble, poking at the voice recorder I'd left on the table while I was in the bathroom.
Evans' mom, Lisa, now speaks directly into the microphone: "Don't listen to them—I'm trying to get them not to say these things!"
But not saying things isn't in the Evans DNA. They're an infectiously gregarious clan. Irish-Italians, proud Bostoners, close-knit, and innately theatrical. "We all act, we sing," Evans says. "It was like the fucking von Trapps." Mom was a dancer and now runs a children's theater. First-born Carly directed the family puppet shows and studied theater at NYU. Younger brother Scott has parts on One Life to Live and Law & Order under his belt and lives in Los Angeles full-time—something Evans stopped doing several years back. Rounding out the circle are baby sister Shanna and a pair of "strays" the family brought into their Sudbury, Massachusetts, home: Josh, who went from mowing the lawn to moving in when his folks relocated during his senior year in high school; and Demery, who was Evans' roommate until recently.
"Our house was like a hotel," Evans says. "It was a loony-tunes household. If you got arrested in high school, everyone knew: 'Call Mrs. Evans, she'll bail you out.'"
Growing up, they had a special floor put in the basement where all the kids practiced tap-dancing. The party-ready rec room also had a Ping-Pong table and a separate entrance. This was the house kids in the neighborhood wanted to hang at, and this was the kind of family you wanted to be adopted by. Spend an afternoon listening to them dish old dirt and talk over each other and it's easy to see why. Now they're worried they've said too much, laid bare the tender soul of the actor behind the star-spangled superhero outfit, so there's talk of offing the interviewer. I can hear all this from the bathroom, which, of course, is the point of a good stage whisper.
To be sure, no one's said too much, and the more you're brought into the embrace of this boisterous, funny, shit-slinging, demonstrably loving extended family, the more likable and enviable the whole dynamic is.
Sample exchange from today's lunch of baked ziti at a family-style Italian restaurant:
Mom: When he was a kid, he asked me, 'Mom, will I ever think farting isn't funny?'
Chris: You're throwing me under the bus, Ma! Thank you.
Mom: Well, if a dog farts you still find it funny.
Then, back at the apartment, where Mrs. Evans tries to give me good-natured dirt on her son without freaking him out:
Mom: You always tell me when you think a girl is attractive. You'll call me up so excited. Is that okay to say?
Chris: Nothing wrong with that.
Mom: And can I say all the girls you've brought to the house have been very sweet and wonderful? Of course, those are the ones that make it to the house. It's been a long time, hasn't it?
Chris: Looooong time.
Mom: The last one at our house? Was it six years ago?
Chris: No names, Ma!
Mom: But she knocked it out of the park.
Chris: She got drunk and puked at Auntie Pam's house! And she puked on the way home and she puked at our place.
Mom: And that's when I fell in love with her. Because she was real.
We're operating under a no-names rule, so I'm not asking if it's Jessica Biel who made this memorable first impression. She and Evans were serious for a couple of years. But I don't want to picture lovely Jessica Biel getting sick at Auntie Pam's or in the car or, really, anywhere.
East the bulldog ambles over to the table, begging for food.
"That dog is the love of his life," Mrs. Evans says. "Which tells me he'll be an unbelievable parent, but I don't want him to get married right now." She turns to Chris. "The way you are, I just don't think you're ready."
Some other things I learn about Evans from his mom: He hates going to the gym; he was so wound-up as a kid she'd let him stand during dinner, his legs shaking like caged greyhounds; he suffered weekly "Sunday-night meltdowns" over schoolwork and the angst of the sensitive middle-schooler; after she and his father split and he was making money from acting, he bought her the Sudbury family homestead rather than let her leave it.
Eventually his mom and Josh depart, and Evans and I go to work depleting his stash of Bud Light. It feels like we drink Bud Light and talk for days, because we basically do. I arrived early Friday evening; it's Saturday night now and it'll be sunup Sunday before I sleeplessly make my way to catch a train back to New York City. Somewhere in between we slip free of the gravitational pull of the bachelor pad and there's bottle service at a club and a long walk with entourage in tow back to Evans' apartment, where there is some earnest-yet-surreal group singing, piano playing, and chitchat. Evans is fun to talk to, partly because he's an open, self-mocking guy with an explosive laugh and no apparent need to sleep, and partly because when you cut just below the surface, it's clear he's not quite the dude's dude he sometimes plays onscreen and in TV appearances.
From a distance, Chris Evans the movie star seems a predictable, nearly inevitable piece of successful Hollywood packaging come to market. There's his major-release debut as the dorkily unaware jock Jake in the guilty pleasure Not Another Teen Movie (in one memorable scene, Evans has whipped cream on his chest and a banana up his ass). The female-friendly hunk appeal—his character in The Nanny Diaries is named simply Harvard Hottie—is balanced by a kind of casual-Friday, I'm-from-Boston regular-dudeness. Following the siren song of comic-book cash, he was the Human Torch in two Fantastic Four films. As with scrawny Steve Rogers, the Captain America suit beefed up his stature as a formidable screen presence, a bankable leading man, all of which leads us to The Avengers, this season's megabudget, megawatt ensemble in which he stars alongside Scarlett Johansson, Mark Ruffalo, Robert Downey Jr., and Chris Hemsworth.
It all feels inevitable—and yet it nearly didn't happen. Evans repeatedly turned down the Captain America role, fearing he'd be locked into what was originally a nine-picture deal. He was shooting Puncture, about a drug-addicted lawyer, at the time. Most actors doing small-budget legal dramas would jump at the chance to play the lead in a Marvel franchise, but Evans saw a decade of his life flash before his eyes.
What he remembers thinking is this: "What if the movie comes out and it's a success and I just reject all of this? What if I want to move to the fucking woods?"
By "the woods," he doesn't mean a quiet life away from the spotlight, some general metaphorical life escape route. He means the actual woods. "For a long time all I wanted for Christmas were books about outdoor survival," he says. "I was convinced that I was going to move to the woods. I camped a lot, I took classes. At 18, I told myself if I don't live in the woods by the time I'm 25, I have failed."
Evans has described his hesitation at signing on for Captain America. Usually he talks about the time commitment, the loss of what remained of his relative anonymity. On the junkets for the movie, he was open about needing therapy after the studio reduced the deal to six movies and he took the leap. What he doesn't usually mention is that he was racked with anxiety before the job came up.
"I get very nervous," Evans explains. "I shit the bed if I have to present something on stage or if I'm doing press. Because it's just you." He's been known to walk out of press conferences, to freeze up and go silent during the kind of relaxed-yet-high-stakes meetings an actor of his stature is expected to attend: "Do you know how badly I audition? Fifty percent of the time I have to walk out of the room. I'm naturally very pale, so I turn red and sweat. And I have to literally walk out. Sometimes mid-audition. You start having these conversations in your brain. 'Chris, don't do this. Chris, take it easy. You're just sitting in a room with a person saying some words, this isn't life. And you're letting this affect you? Shame on you.'"
Shades of "Sunday-night meltdowns." Luckily the nerves never follow him to the set. "You do your neuroses beforehand, so when they yell 'Action' you can be present," he says.
Okay, there was one on-set panic attack—while Evans was shooting Puncture. "We were getting ready to do a court scene in front of a bunch of people, and I don't know what happened," he says. "It's just your brain playing games with you. 'Hey, you know how we sometimes freak out? What if we did it right now?'"
One of the people who advised Evans to take the Captain America role was his eventual Avengers costar Robert Downey Jr. "I'd seen him around," Downey says. "We share an agent. I like to spend a lot of my free time talking to my agent about his other clients—I just had a feeling about him."
What he told Evans was: This puppy is going to be big, and when it is you're going to get to make the movies you want to make. "In the marathon obstacle course of a career," Downey says, "it's just good to have all the stats on paper for why you're not only a team player but also why it makes sense to support you in the projects you want to do—because you've made so much damned money for the studio."
There's also the fact that Evans had a chance to sign on for something likely to be a kind of watershed moment in the comic-book fascination of our time. "I do think The Avengers is the crescendo of this superhero phase in entertainment—except of course for Iron Man 3," Downey says. "It'll take a lot of innovation to keep it alive after this."
Captain America is the only person left who was truly close to Howard Stark, father of Tony Stark (a.k.a. Iron Man), which meant that Evans' and Downey's story lines are closely linked, and in the course of doing a lot of scenes together, they got to be pals. Downey diagnoses his friend with what he terms "low-grade red-carpet anxiety disorder."
"He just hates the game-show aspect of doing PR," Downey says. "Obviously there's pressure for anyone in this transition he's in. But he will easily triple that pressure to make sure he's not being lazy. That's why I respect the guy. I wouldn't necessarily want to be in his skin. But his motives are pure. He just needs to drink some red-carpet chamomile."
"The majority of the world is empty space," Chris Evans says, watching me as if my brain might explode on hearing this news—or like he might have to fight me if I try to contradict him. We're back at his apartment after a cigarette run through the Combat Zone.
"Empty space!" he says again, slapping the table and sort of yelling. Then, in a slow, breathy whisper, he repeats: "Empty space, empty space. All that we see in the world, the life, the animals, plants, people, it's all empty space. That's amazing!" He slaps the table again. "You want another beer? Gotta be Bud Light. Get dirty—you're in Boston. Okay, organize your thoughts. I gotta take a piss . . ."
My thoughts are this: That this guy who is hugging his dog and talking to me about space and mortality and the trouble with Boston girls who believe crazy gossip about him—this is not the guy I expected to meet. I figured he'd be a meatball. Though, truthfully, I'd never called anyone a meatball until Evans turned me on to the put-down. As in: "My sister Shanna dates meatballs." And, more to the point: "When I do interviews, I'd rather just be the beer-drinking dude from Boston and not get into the complex shit, because I don't want every meatball saying, 'So hey, whaddyathink about Buddhism?'"
At 17, Evans came across a copy of Hermann Hesse's Siddhartha and began his spiritual questing. It's a path of study and struggle that, he says, defines his true purpose in life. "I love acting. It's my playground, it lets me explore. But my happiness in this world, my level of peace, is never going to be dictated by acting," he says. "My goal in life is to detach from the egoic mind. Do you know anything about Eastern philosophy?"
I sip some Bud Light and shake my head sheepishly. "They talk about the egoic mind, the part of you that's self-aware, the watcher, the person you think is driving this machine," he says. "And that separation from self and mind is the root of suffering. There are ways of retraining the way you think. This isn't really supported in Western society, which is focused on 'Go get it, earn it, win it, marry it.'"
Scarlett Johansson says that one of the things she appreciates about Evans is how he steers clear of industry chat when they see each other. "Basically every actor," she says, "including myself, when we finish a job we're like, 'Well, that's it for me. Had a good run. Put me out to pasture.' But Chris doesn't strike me as someone who frets about the next job." The two met on the set of The Perfect Score when they were teenagers and have stayed close; The Avengers is their third movie together. "He has this obviously masculine presence—a dude's dude—and we're used to seeing him play heroic characters," Johansson says, "but he's also surprisingly sensitive. He has close female friends, and you can talk to him about anything. Plus there's that secret song-and-dance, jazz-hands side of Chris. I feel like he grew up with the Partridge Family. He'd be just as happy doing Guys and Dolls as he would Captain America 2."
East needs to do his business, so Evans and I take him up to the roof deck. Evans bought this apartment in 2010 when living in L.A. full-time no longer appealed to him. He came back to stay close to his extended family and the intimate circle of Boston pals he's maintained since high school. The move also seems like a pretty clear keep-it-real hedge against the manic ego-stroking distractions of Hollywood.
"I think my daytime person is different than my nighttime person," Evans says. "With my high-school buddies, we drink beer and talk sports and it's great. The kids in my Buddhism class in L.A., they're wildly intelligent, and I love being around them, but they're not talking about the Celtics. And that's part of me. It's a strange dichotomy. I don't mind being a certain way with some people and having this other piece of me that's just for me."
I asked Downey about Evans' outward regular-Joe persona. "It's complete horseshit," Downey says. "There's an inherent street-smart intelligence there. I don't think he tries to hide it. But he's much more evolved and much more culturally aware than he lets on."
Perhaps the meatball and the meditation can coexist. We argue about our egoic brains and the tao of Boston girls. "I love wet hair and sweatpants," he says in their defense. "I like sneakers and ponytails. I like girls who aren't so la-di-da. L.A. is so la-di-da. I like Boston girls who shit on me. Not literally. Girls who give me a hard time, bust my chops a little."
The chief buster of Evans' chops is, of course, Evans himself. "The problem is, the brain I'm using to dissect this world is a brain formed by it," he says. "We're born into confusion, and we get the blessing of letting go of it." Then he adds: "I think this shit by day. And then night comes and it's like, 'Fuck it, let's drink.'"
And so we do. It's getting late. Again. We should have eaten dinner, but Evans sometimes forgets to eat: "If I could just take a pill to make me full forever, I wouldn't think twice."
We talk about his dog and camping with his dog and why he loves being alone more than almost anything except maybe not being alone. "I swear to God, if you saw me when I am by myself in the woods, I'm a lunatic," he says. "I sing, I dance. I do crazy shit."
Evans' unflagging, all-encompassing enthusiasm is impressive, itself a kind of social intelligence. "If you want to have a good conversation with him, don't talk about the fact that he's famous" was the advice I got from Mark Kassen, who codirected Puncture. "He's a blast, a guy who can hang. For quite a long time. Many hours in a row."
I've stopped looking at the clock. We've stopped talking philosophy and moved into more emotional territory. He asks questions about my 9-month-old son, and then Captain America gets teary when I talk about the wonder of his birth. "I weep at everything," he says. "I emote. I love things so much—I just never want to dilute that."
He talks about how close he feels to his family, how open they all are with each other. About everything. All the time. "The first time I had sex," he says, "I raced home and was like, 'Mom, I just had sex! Where's the clit?'"
Wait, I ask—did she ever tell you?
"Still don't know where it is, man," he says, then breaks into a smile composed of equal parts shit-eating grin and inner peace. "I just don't know. Make some movies, you don't have to know…"
If someone doesn't want to check the link, the anon sent the full interview!
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lokiondisneyplus · 3 years
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No character in the Marvel Cinematic Universe has the staying power of Loki. Portrayed with just the right amount of smarm and charm by Tom Hiddleston, the impish trickster with the ability to shapeshift and cast illusions is a favorite among fans despite the fact he's betrayed friends and family multiple times since debuting opposite Chris Hemsworth in 2011's "Thor." The most predictable thing about him might be his unpredictability. And yet no one thought the character would return to the MCU after being killed by the all-mighty Thanos (Josh Brolin) in the opening scene of 2018's "Avengers: Infinity War." However, we're now on the cusp of the character leading his very own show.
Debuting Wednesday, June 9 on Disney+, the six-episode "Loki" follows a past version of the character, though it's not a prequel. This Loki is the man who successfully stole the Tesseract, aka the Space Stone, when the Avengers traveled to the past in 2019's "Avengers: Endgame." His actions that day ultimately created a branched reality — the very thing the Ancient One (Tilda Swinton) warned the Avengers about when they attempted to gather the stones in the past. So when the show picks up, Loki will find himself being forced to work with the Time Variance Authority, an organization dedicated to protecting the proper flow of time, to help restore the main timeline he broke when he fled with the Tesseract in 2012.
It remains to be seen whether or not the series is one of the shows Marvel's Kevin Feige said was developed with additional seasons in mind. But with this particular setup — and assuming the show operates independently of the main overarching narrative of the MCU — this is the type of series that could easily run for multiple seasons should the people involved desire it. And given his comments over the years, Hiddleston definitely seems game to portray Loki until he's too old to do so.
But what is it about the character, a Frost Giant who was adopted by Odin (Anthony Hopkins) as a baby and raised as an Asgardian, that has allowed him to persevere – especially when Natasha Romanoff (Scarlett Johansson), Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr) and even Steve Rogers (Chris Evans) have not? What gives Loki, a character who has been both villain and antihero, such longevity in the MCU? Is it Hiddleston himself? Is he nurturing goodwill with his enchanting performance? Is it the character's unpredictability keeping things fresh? Or is it the potential of a flawed man still searching for an identity and purpose?
Over the last decade, Hiddleston — whose name was once bandied about as a possible James Bond candidate after a stellar turn in "The Night Manager" — has won favor with Marvel and its fans thanks to his continued dedication to the role of Loki and his support of the extended universe. Some actors have been happy to say goodbye after fulfilling their contracts, but you'd be hard-pressed to find an actor who loves his job with Marvel more than Hiddleston. (Never forget the time he dressed up in character and took over Hall H at San Diego Comic-Con in 2013.) But in addition to his acting chops and commitment to the role of Loki, Hiddleston is also just an effortlessly charming individual, and some of that natural charisma bleeds into his performance, making the character a richer and more complex character as a result. And it's a good thing too because a character like Loki — someone ruled by his emotions, whose only allegiance is to himself, and who wouldn't think twice before double-crossing his own brother — runs the risk of becoming either very annoying or quite tired rather quickly. Luckily, Loki is neither.
After learning the truth of his origins in the first Thor film, Loki's anger toward his family and the betrayal he felt put him on a path to finding his purpose, which resulted in him becoming the mouthy and manipulative, power-hungry antagonist of the first Avengers movie. At the time, no one outside of Feige and other decision-making executives likely knew what was in store for the future of the MCU.
But now we can look back and see Hiddleston's captivating turn in "The Avengers," in which he attempts to take control of Earth using an army of Chitauri forces, was more than just the catalyst for the various heroes recruited by Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson) to finally team up. It was also the beginning of what might be the best character arc in the entire MCU. No one save perhaps Sebastian Stan's Bucky Barnes, aka the Winter Soldier, has had a more complicated or effective emotional personal journey throughout the entirety of the Infinity Saga (and beyond). Perhaps that is why when Loki was eventually killed several films later in the middle of his redemption arc during the opening scene of "Infinity War," the heartbreak seemed to extend beyond the edges of the frame and into the real world.
The exceptionally fun 2017 film "Thor: Ragnarok," which immediately preceded "Infinity War," saw Loki forced to confront his past and make a decision regarding his future. The death of his father and the return of Hela (Cate Blanchett), the Goddess of Death and the sister neither Loki nor Thor knew existed, ultimately meant the end of life as he knew it. But rather than fleeing at the first chance like everyone assumed he would, Loki accepted his place in his family and returned to his brother's side after the destruction of Asgard. Of course, he also pocketed the Tesseract before the planet was destroyed, a seemingly innocuous decision that would unfortunately lead Thanos right to him. But learning to care about something more than his own immediate wants was a redeeming moment for Loki, as was his attempt to save Thor from Thanos, so his death was both an effectively heartbreaking moment that resonated with fans while serving as a harbinger of what was to come.
It also felt like closure, so when a past version of Loki popped up in "Avengers: Endgame" when Tony, Cap, and Scott Lang (Paul Rudd) traveled to 2012, it was a pleasant surprise. That the new series "Loki" follows this branched-reality version of the character and won't erase the character's original narrative arc is what makes the show such an intriguing new chapter. When the show premieres, Loki hasn't gone through any sort of character evolution. He is still the angry man who tried to force all of humanity to kneel before him in a desperate attempt to find his place in the world. He has yet to go through the events of his mother's death or the destruction of Asgard. He's a man out of time, a man without a home. And it's the chaotic, still-in-progress nature of Loki and the inability to guess what he might do when an organization like the Time Variance Authority, which is dedicated to order, tries to force him to do what they say that makes this new chapter so exciting.
Each episode of the show, which also stars Owen Wilson as Mobius M. Mobius and Gugu Mbatha-Raw as Judge Ravonna Lexus Renslayer, will see the character travel through time and space on a mission to restore order to the timeline. But will this Loki follow the same path as the man we know and love? Or will this version make different choices without Thor by his side? More importantly, will he find what he's looking for?
Loki is a man driven by insecurity and an ongoing struggle with his identity, though he deftly covers up his deficiencies with a devious wit and charm. The constantly shifting logo in the show's trailer represents both the character's shapeshifting ability as much as the idea that he doesn't know where he belongs or who he is yet. And although the beats of such a character arc are hardly new territory for Hollywood — you could argue they've even been done to death at this point — the potential for greatness still exists as Loki remains pleasantly unpredictable. It means anything can happen, and with Hiddleston promising a show that is unlike anything Marvel has ever done, there's no reason to believe Loki the man and "Loki" the show won't continue to endure and evolve even beyond this first season. After all, he certainly has the staying power.
"Loki" premieres Wednesday, June 9 on Disney+.
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teamhook · 3 years
Text
Always, Always a Bridesmaid :: 27 Dresses Birthday CS AU
Hello! This is the final installment of my birthday fic for @ultraluckycatnd
Thank you to my beta @demisexualemmaswan
Much love and thanks for the help from @veryverynotgood and @karlyfr13s and the CSMM discord ladies that help with sprints and their encouragement.
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FFN
AO3
The newly engaged couple wanted to share the joyous news right away with Mr. Goldman. The doting father was elated at the prospect of having his younger daughter back in town permanently. Emma’s obvious discomfort went unnoticed by her family. Midas without thinking passed down the bride-to-be her mother’s wedding gown, completely missing her fake smile. He was just happy at the thought of his little girl finding a good man and moving back to the States.
“Thank you, Daddy!” Kathryn said.
Graham smiled lovingly at his fiance as she showed him the gown.
Sitting across from the couple, Emma’s heart sunk even further. Not only had her sister swiped away her dream man but her mother’s beloved gown as well. She shouldn’t hold Graham against Kathryn because she didn’t know...but the dress was a different story.
Emma took a deep breath as she entered the bar. She still couldn’t believe she had taken the guy up on his offer for a drink. Who was she kidding? The moment Kathryn and Graham’s eyes met she had increased her alcohol consumption. She was not an alcoholic yet but she was enjoying the drink a little too often.
Killian waved at her from the bar.
Emma plopped down at the chair next to him.
“Hello, love.” Killian smiled widely.
Emma forced a smile. “Hello.”
Killian took a long, scrutinizing look at her. “I can’t help but wonder what deity I owe the pleasure of your company. Don’t get me wrong, love. I’m ecstatic, but you had been dodging my calls, and you suddenly called me to invite me out for a drink.”
Emma grimaced. “My baby sister is getting married.”
“Ah, before you.”
“That is not why I’m upset,” she defended.
“I’m afraid I don’t follow.”
Emma sighed and ran her hands through her hair. “You don’t know my sister. Kathryn is going to want me to do everything for her. I will not just be her maid of honor,” she said with exasperation.
“I don’t see the problem. You ‘love weddings’.” he reminded her.
“I do love weddings but I’m going to have to take care of everything .”
“Alright. How about you simply say, ‘No’?”
“What?” she asked confusedly.
“Love, you have said, ‘No’ to people before haven’t you?”
She scoffed. “Of course I have!”
Killian’s raised his eyebrow skeptically.
“Many, many times before but not in this situation.”
“But you want to say no this time?”
She nodded. “I wish I could. But I can’t; it’s my sister.”
“Alright. We are going to play this little game to practice saying ‘no’.”
Emma stared at him.
Killian took a big breath. “Emma, love, give me 50 dollars.”
“NO!” Emma said with a smile.
“Emma, darling. It’s only 50 dollars. I promise I’ll pay you back,” he said, holding his hand on his heart.
“No,” she said, proud of herself.
“Emma, love. I need you…” he said, licking his lips seductively, leaning closer to her, “To give me 50 dollars.”
“ No ?” she said hesitantly.
“Eh, not bad, darling,” he said proudly. “May I have your drink?”
“Yeah, sure,” she said as she pushed the drink to him.
He grabbed it and with a smirk.
“Wait, I meant no!”
Killian tsked. “You were doing so well. That's terrible,” he said as he enjoyed her drink.
“Mmhmm,” she sighed disappointedly.
The night came to an end not long after for the pair after the game.
Kathryn and Emma shared a walk through Central Park as they talked about wedding plans.
“Ems, did you go to the flower shop and order the favors?”
“Yeah.” She nodded.
“And the invitation mock-ups? Did you get those done?”
“Yes. Done.”
“This is so much fun!”
The girls kept walking.
“Oh, and I want you to ask your friend to be my bridesmaid. The rude one.”
“You want me to ask Ruby? My best friend.”
“Yeah, she is really pretty and she will not throw off the aesthetics. You know that I don’t have girlfriends. Girls, they don't like me.” Kathryn shrugged. “I just don’t understand why.”
Emma gave her an incredulous look with a raised brow.
Kathryn rolled her eyes. “Fine. I know why. Just ask her.”
“Of course.”
“I was thinking you should do a slideshow for the rehearsal dinner with pictures of Graham and me together and say funny things.”
“Okay, I will get the photos from Graham. I have our family photo albums.”
Kathryn squealed. “Before I forget, guess what.”
“What?”
“You know that writer you stalk…well, he called me because he wants to do a whole Commitments column on us for the Journal. Can you believe it?”
“Of course, at this point, I absolutely can. Why not?”
Kathryn stopped across the Boathouse. “I have been thinking and I think you are right. It would be a lovely wedding if I got married where mom and dad got married.”
Emma gaped at her sister for a second. “I didn’t think that was your style.”
“It isn’t but why not? I’m wearing mom’s dress,” she shrugged.
“You are always going on and on about how perfect it was. Tada!” Kathryn enthusiastically waved her hands in the direction of the venue. “We are getting married in three weeks.”
Emma gulped, “Three weeks?”
“Yeah. When I called they didn’t have any availability for 18 months. Then they called me to say they had a cancellation. So I had to take it. I know you can pull it together quickly. I don’t want to wait.”
Emma just forced a smile.
“I don’t get it. Emma, you could at least try to act like you are happy for me.”
Emma resorted to an old nickname from their childhood to appease her sister. “KitKat, you know I am…”
“I know that you wanted to get married at the Boathouse wearing mom’s dress but I’m really happy and I thought my big sis would be happy for me.”
“I am. I just didn’t know that’s what you wanted…”
“It is and you will get the dress after. Okay. Now can we talk about more important stuff?” Kathryn said as she resumed walking.
Emma stood on ceremony.
“Come on. Emma, you have a lot of work to do. I don't like the linens, and I think you need to rent new ones because they do not go with the color scheme that I picked out.”
The next day she met Ruby at the Yoga studio for their workout and she shared the news. She had to beg her to say yes to being a bridesmaid. She couldn’t be alone in this mess.
Finally Ruby relented only after being kicked out for talking.
“You want this cake in three weeks? Emma, I don’t know if I can do it. It’s just not enough time for what you want.”
“Tiana, I know you can do it. I wouldn’t ask otherwise. Do you remember the beautiful six-tiered heart-shaped cake that was commissioned by the Fisher’s or the tower of edible gifts for the Page-Booth outdoor fiesta. You can do anything, and we both know it.”
“ Three weeks?”
“Do it for your favorite maid-of-honor, please?”
Tiana caved with a smile.
“We have a cake.” Emma turned to her sister and Graham with a wide grin on her face.
The sudden clapping from the door alerted her of the newcomer.
“What are you doing here?” Emma asked, already exasperated by his presence.
“Hello. I’m James Rogers,” he said with a gleaming smile.
Emma’s mouth opened but nothing came out.
“Oh, yes. I’m Kathryn and this is my fiance, Graham.”
“Congratulations! Lovely to meet you both,” he said as charmingly as possible.
“ Thank you,” Kathryn and Graham replied together.
“Oh, and this is my sister, Emma. She is obsessed with your stories. She’s your number one fan. She is going to make a wallpaper with all your articles.”
Killian smirked at Emma. “Is that so?”
Finally, Emma found her voice, “Wait, you said your name was Killian. I’m confused.”
“Aye, my name is Killian. I use James for the byline so I don’t get stalked by the crazy brides,” Killian answered Emma.
Kathryn’s attention was focused on her phone.
Killian turned to Kathryn. “How did you lovebirds meet?”
Emma scoffed, “You are an asshole.”
“Emma!” Kathryn hissed.
“What? He is! He told me his name was Killian.”
“Wait, you two know each other?” Kathryn asked.
“We both work the wedding circuit,” Killian replied.
“Kathryn, can you give us one second? Tell Tiana what you want,” Emma urged her sister in the direction of her friend.
“I can’t believe it. You lied to me,” Emma accused.
“Ah, ah. Love, I told you I was a writer. Where is the lie in that? I just didn’t tell you what I wrote.”
“But…you write the most beautiful things. Which one is it? Do you only pretend to be a cynic… or are you a cynic who knows how to spin romantic crap for girls like me?”
Killian scratched behind his ear. “The second one, the spinning crap one as you so eloquently put it.”
“This is just great. I feel like I just found out my favorite love song was written about a sandwich.”
“James, can I steal you away for a second so we can talk about Graham and me?”
“Of course. That's why I'm here.”
Kathryn and Killian chatted away as they walked towards Graham, leaving Emma behind.
Killian walked with an extra pep in his step. He knew this story would get him out of the dreaded Commitments. He found the address that Kathryn gave him.
He knocked eagerly.
On the other side of the door. Emma groaned as she saw through the peephole. She opened the door just wide enough for her unhappiness to see him be on display.
“Kathryn is not here. You can go now.”
“I’m afraid I’m not here for her. I’m here to interview you for the piece.”
Emma rolled her eyes. “Just go away, I’m not in the mood to talk to you.”
“Come on, lass. For Kathryn and Graham?” he asked, pouting.
Emma hesitated for a second. She knew Kathryn would be angry if she messed this up for her.
“Fine, let’s get this over with.” She opened the door wide for him to walk in.
Killian got his phone out and set it to record. “The maid of honor, although a lovely lass, is a little prickly. Emma, how do you feel about Kathryn’s whirlwind romance?”
Emma took a deep breath. “She’s my little sister. How do you think I feel? I taught her how to tell time, and how to ride a bike. I raised her. Please, don’t print that. It would break my father’s heart but to answer your question. I couldn’t be happier.”
Killian nodded as he listened to her but his attention wasn’t completely on her. His eyes roamed the apartment until they landed on the slightly opened closet. Love, what are those?”
Emma’s eyes followed his gaze and answered as she tried to make her way over to the closet to close the door and keep him away from her prized collection. “That’s nothing.”
Killian was giddy with excitement as he trailed right behind her. “Are those���”
“No!” Emma tried to keep him away by pushing him away from the door but she wasn’t able to keep him from opening the door.
“Bloody hell! Are these all bridesmaid dresses?”
“None of your business.”
“Good God, lass. Why? The closet is so full you can barely close the door.”
“I just have a lot of friends and I like keeping them,” she shrugged.
“Makes perfect sense because they’re bloody beautiful.”
“Some of them are not that bad.”
“I’d like to see one that is not bad.”
“Fine.” Emma started looking through the dresses, muttering not that one, or that one.
“Aha, this one is not bad.” She showed him a greenish dress.
“Love, we need to have those lovely eyes checked because that is the very definition of bad. What color is this? Vomit?”
Emma rolled her eyes. “No, it's an "olivey" green. The color is super flattering. I’m telling you. It looks great on.”
“I disagree. Love, that dress is one of the worst instruments of torture I have ever seen because the bride wants you to look ugly.”
“No, no. Ariel picked it because it looks good on everybody.”
Killian rolled his eyes. “The lass is delusional and believes anything anyone tells her,” he spoke to the recorder.
“I’ll prove it to you.” She grabbed the dress and headed to her room.
Killian kept skimming through the dresses, grimacing as he took them out to look at them. He kept taking pictures of the packed closet.
Emma came out of the room.
He had to agree the dress wasn't that bad but perhaps it was her .
“See?” she said, twirling.
He smiled. “You are right. The dress isn’t that bad but what about the color? He said as he took a picture and showed her the photo.
Emma groaned. “It’s your camera. It’s defective or something.”
Killian looked at her, unamused.
Emma sighed. “Okay, it’s not that good. Are you happy?”
“You look like a very beautiful shiny mermaid. You should be flattered.”
Emma bit her bottom lip. “It's really not the worst one.”
She went on to show him every dress in the closet and he took a picture of each one. They laughed and made fun of the themed weddings and the accessories.
“Love, you have twenty-seven dresses.”
Emma smiled and shrugged.
“I don't understand. You attend the wedding, why not throw the dress after? This is a huge closet.”
“I know you don’t believe me but I’ve had really good times in those dresses.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“It’s not about me. It’s about supporting them.”
“Alright, but how much time do you spend doing this for others? What about you?”
Emma sighed, “Someday… It will be my day and those people will be there for me.”
Killian’s camera flash took her by surprise. He couldn’t help capturing the image. The look in her eye spoke to his cynical soul. He thanked her for the hospitality but made his excuse to leave.
Emma arrived at Graham’s apartment. She could hear the loud music through the door. Emma rolled her eyes, Kathryn was too busy for the gift registry but she was okay taking full advantage of the fact Graham was out of town for business. She only hoped her sister wasn’t doing anything she would regret.
She rang the doorbell.
Kathryn opened the door enough to give Emma the list. “Here I thought you were going to wait for me downstairs.”
Emma knew her sister well enough to know she was trying to get rid of her.
Emma pushed past her. “Kathryn, what is going on here?” Her eyes landing on Henry vacuuming the living room.
Kathyrn scoffed. “What? He was looking for a part-time job to buy a new computer. He wants an Apple MacBook Air because he wants to be a writer.”
“You have a kid cleaning your fiance's apartment. Graham adores him. He has been his big brother for years.” Emma said in disbelief.
“It’s our secret. Henry’s and mine. Ems, don’t worry about it, okay. You should go, it’s getting late.”
Emma left, grabbing the list. She wondered if she told Graham the truth about Kathryn, what he would say. At the park, she had tried to make him see her sister’s lies but he was blind by his attraction for her.
Killian was looking through his notes and the pictures with a faint smile on his face.
Cora appeared at his cubicle suddenly, as if transported by magic.
A startled Killian snapped up from his computer screen. “Cora, did you need something?”
“The bridesmaid story you pitched, what do you have so far?”
“Ah, yes, it’s still a little rough. I’m working on it.”
“I want to see it now . Email it.” She said and walked away.
“Cora, it’s not ready! Bloody hell,” he muttered, Killian got up from his chair to chase after her after sending the email. She was a heartless woman and people had been fired for less. He had been lucky she had found value in him.
Cora was sitting down behind her desk when he arrived. “Cora, the email was sent with the draft. I hope you let me know what you think and just keep that in mind,” Killian said.
She just nodded a silent way to dismiss him.
“Hello, love. Did you miss me?” Killian whispered in Emma’s ear as she scanned the cookware.
Emma jumped a bit and almost dropped the crystal glasses.
She glared at Killian. “What are you doing here? I didn’t invite you. Go away, please?”
“Kathryn did.” He smiled. “I’m just doing my job. I have to see every aspect of the wedding.”
Emma rolled her eyes as she kept scanning things off of Kathryn’s list distancing herself from him.
“Your sister wants so many presents that she physically cannot register for them herself?” he asked when he caught up with her.
Emma stopped scanning and turned her attention to Killian. “It’s a short engagement so she is pressed for time.”
“How many casserole dishes does a person need? Kathryn doesn’t strike me as the cooking type,” he said as he trailed behind her again.
“This isn't just another vahze ." Emma turned to face him, annoyed at his comments.
“It’s called a vase,” he said matter of factly.
“You just don’t get it. These are the things you build a life with.”
“No, love. This is useless crap that the 70-billion-dollar-a-year wedding industry has conned you into believing that you need to have or you won't be happy.”
“No, you know what I think? I think that all your theories are just a smokescreen.”
“For what, darling?”
“Your secret, whatever it is. Maybe you haven’t found the right girl and you're afraid you never will.”
Killian sat down on a display couch. “And I think that you love weddings so much because you prefer to focus on everyone else’s Kodak moments rather than make memories of your own.”
“What do you want me to say? You're right? You are crazy. Weddings are the worst place to forget you are single.”
“Love, you want a wedding, not a marriage, a bloody wedding. The dress and the special day.”
“What is your problem, asshole? Let me guess you had a fancy wedding and your wife left you for someone else?”
Killian’s jaw ticked. “Aye, with my college professor by the way. They lived happily ever after with their son.”
“What? Oh, shit. I’m sorry. Killian, it was just a guess.”
“A good one,” he laughed bitterly. “For someone who has no insight whatsoever into herself, you nailed me right on the head.”
“Hey, do you want to find the ugliest stuff in here and register Kathryn for it?”
“Aye, let’s do it. I saw the most hideous crocodile gravy boat on the counter back there,” he said with a devilish smile on his face.
Killian walked to Cora’s office.
“Hey, you wanted to see me?” Killian asked as he opened the door and sat down.
“Wow,” she said.
“Cora, I told you I wasn’t done with it. I need to do some edits.” Killian said.
“Relax. I like it. It's a decent story. I have to admit, I was shocked. It’s smart and entertaining.”
“Thank you,” he replied.
“You really nailed this girl. We’re running the story Sunday, front page.”
“No, no. It’s not ready,” Killian insisted. “I still have some things to add and I know it will make it worth the wait.”
Cora crossed her arms over her chest and raised her brows. "You have been begging me for months for a chance. How about some gratitude?"
Mind reeling, Killian searched for any reason to stall Cora's decision. “I really want to get this right. Can you give me a week to make it perfect?”
“If I didn’t know you any better I would say you care for her. Did the girl get under your skin?”
He scoffed, “Of course not. I’m just trying to do my job. She’s more than this perpetual bridesmaid. There’s more to her tale. Just give me a week and you will not regret it.”
“Fine. Get out.”
Killian called Emma to see if they could meet to talk but was greeted with Kathryn’s voice instead. Kathryn had told him that Emma was meeting Graham to pick the menu for the reception. He truly wondered what she was doing for her own wedding. She was always doing something for her instead of for the wedding preparations. He understood what Emma had meant when she told him she would need to do everything.
Killian showed up at the restaurant and stopped in his tracks. Even from his spot, he knew the signs of a woman smitten with the man she was talking to. Emma was in love with Graham. Bloody hell, his stomach dropped for some unknown reason. She was smiling freely at something he said. He hadn’t dared to get closer to them. How could anyone else miss the obvious signs? How could he have missed it?
Emma and Graham were so busy in their conversation that they had not noticed Killian’s arrival. So he started to walk away.
After hearing Graham praising Kathryn, Emma wanted to tell him the truth. She is not who he thinks but stopped herself because he looked so happy. She will not be the one to break his heart.
“Emma, tell me what is your favorite part of a wedding?” Graham asked.
“My favorite part of the wedding is watching the groom’s face when the bride is walking down the aisle, and seeing the pure love on his face,” Emma said.
“I think it’s easy to look at your bride with love if she is like your sister. Kathryn is wonderful and I am very happy I found her,” Graham said with a loving gaze.
Emma smiled at him then lowered her gaze to her plate.
Graham turned away to get the waiter’s attention but noticed Killian walking away.
“Rogers, Is that you?”
Killian winced but forced a fake smile as he turned to face the table.
Emma glared at him as he approached them.
“What are you doing here?” she asked through gritted teeth.
“I have some more questions for you,” he said simply.
“You could email me the questions and I will return the email.”
“Where’s Kathryn?” Killian asked.
“She’s busy and couldn’t make it so she asked me to come in her place,” Emma said.
“Hmm. She couldn’t come to pick the wedding meal?”
“Emma is just helping out. Kathryn had a hair appointment; we are having dinner with my parents later,” Graham replied.
“I’m sure Emma was happy to oblige,” Killian said.
“Should we leave now?” Emma asked Graham.
“We should we're heading up to Rhinebeck to pick out
some linens from an antique store,” Graham said as he waved the waiter over.
“I have an idea, How about if I go with Emma in your place? I imagine you have things to do before your dinner.”
“No, no, that’s okay. We can make it back in plenty of time,” Emma answered quickly.
“I don't mind,” Killian said with a smile.
Graham nodded. “It would be a great help.”
“Mate, I insist,” Killian said.
Graham paid and went on his way.
Emma and Killian got in her dad’s car and drove away.
Emma was driving with a scowl on her face.
Killian laughed, “Of course you’re angry at having to plan your sister’s wedding to the man you love. The second I saw you mooning over him while you had your meal. It was like a bloody anchor was dropped. You won’t say anything because you are too used to facilitating others' happiness instead of your own.”
Emma scoffed. “You don’t know what you are talking about.”
“Hmm. You are miserable and unwilling to do anything about it.”
“You are crazy! I’m thrilled to be planning their wedding. She’s my baby sister like I have for every wedding that I've been a part of. You wouldn’t understand because you are cynical, mean, and dark. That’s your problem, buddy, not mine.”
“Buddy? Did you call me buddy?”
“I could have called you an asshole! Just shut up!”
“I understand you’re vexed. I ruined the day of you pining for somebody that will never be yours!” Killian roared.
“Stop!” Emma yelled back.
Killian’s attention turned back to the rainy road. Perhaps it wasn’t the best time to antagonize her.
“Love, you need to slow down so I can read the sign.”
The car kept picking up speed.
“Do you think you could slow down? Ease your foot off the accelerator.”
“Don’t you ever shut up?”
Killian checked his seatbelt. He should have waited to say his thoughts but she had given him the cold shoulder since they left the restaurant. He hadn’t noticed when the weather had gotten that bad. It was as if the rain was mimicking her mood.
“Emma, love. Slow down, we’re going to hydroplane,” he said in a soothing voice.
Emma rolled her eyes. “We are not going to hydroplane.” Her fingers squeezed the steering wheel tightly as she made a slight correction and the car started swerving out of control. “Shit, shit!! We are hydroplaning!!”
Killian hissed as he grabbed onto the armrest and gripped it as if his life depended on it. In a way it did, he supposed.
“Bloody hell! I told you to slow down! Lass, just calm down and ease your foot off the gas--”
“Shut it! I know what I’m doing.” She eased her foot on the break as she eased it off the gas like Killian suggested and maneuvered the vehicle to safety. “This is your fault if you would have stopped talking for a moment like I asked, I would have been able to focus on the road.”
Killian glared at her.
The car was stuck and they couldn’t get it out. It was too late for a tow truck and there was no cell phone service.
Killian spotted a bar not too far from them. “Come along, lass. Let’s see if we can get some help or at the very least get a drink.”
Emma hesitantly followed him.
The place was a small hole in the wall bar.
Killian found the payphone right away.
“You got anything?” Emma asked.
He shook his head no. “Mate, your phone doesn’t work,” Killian said to the bartender.
The man shrugged. “Nice detective skills. It has been out of service for a while.”
“Our car broke down and we have no cell service,” Emma told the bartender.
The man pulled out a phone from beneath the bar. “You will not find someone to come help you right now. The rain is bad and it’s getting late.”
Emma groaned.
Killian approached the bar. “Rum, three fingers, no ice, please.”He pulled a stool and sat down.
“What are you doing?” Emma asked, annoyed as she followed him.
“You heard the man, we are not getting a tow anytime soon. I’m going to enjoy a drink. There’s nothing you can do. You should have a drink.”
The bartender handed Killian his drink.
“Thanks, mate.”
Emma sat down next to Killian. “Fine, I’ll have one, let me have the same.”
After several drinks, Emma eyed him carefully.
“Jones, I have to know something. You once wrote a column that was so beautiful it made me cry.”
“Aww,” he mocked.
“The Zimmer-York article was full of emotion. It was the anniversary of the mother's death. The brother flew home from Afghanistan.”
Killian remembered the article but he would not admit it. “Sorry, I don’t recall.”
“How can you not remember it? You cannot fake emotion like that.”
“A talented writer like meself can.”
“You’re not that good.”
Killian signaled the bartender for another round of drinks.
“Be honest with me for once. What is your favorite part of a wedding?”
He stared at her. “My favorite part of a wedding is an open bar.” He smiled and waggled his eyebrows.
“No. Everybody likes that.”
Killian laughed. “Alright. The part when the bride is making her grand entrance. I like to glance back at the wanker getting married. He looks happy even though he is willingly entering into the last form of slavery.”
Emma’s eyes widened as he finished talking.
Killian scratched behind his ear nervously. “Why the bloody hell are you looking at me like that?”
“Are you serious? That’s my favorite part! I can’t believe it. We have something in common.”
“Aye, that must make us kindred spirits. Love, it was bound to happen.”
“Just admit you are a big teddy bear that the whole cynical thing is an act so you can seem wounded and mysterious… and sexy.”
“I’m sorry love, what was the last one?”
“ Huh ?”
“You think I’m sexy, love? I'm startling, aren't I? Some people say striking, but I will accept sexy.”
“No, I don’t. I think you think you are sexy.”
“Mhmm,” he said with a wide smile.
Emma’s cheeks blushed bright pink.
Benny and the Jets played loudly, filling the moment of silence between them.
“I love this song,” Emma said, swaying to the beat of the song.
“Aye, it’s a great song.” Killian hummed in tune then broke into song, “ Hey, kids shake it loose together… That's been known to change the weather.”
Emma snorts in an unladylike way. “Those are not the lyrics,” she giggled.
“Those are the lyrics. Alright, lyric police. What are the correct words?”
“You're gonna hear a handsome music… So the walrus sounds.”
Killian laughed. “Walrus sounds?”
Emma grinned and continued, “Say, Penny's no longer in a cement jet… Ooh, but you're so laced down.”
He shook his head, but joined her in the next line. “Buh, buh, buh, buh Bennie and the Jets…”
Emma continued belting out the lyrics, “O oh, in the wind and the waterfall… Oh, baby, she's a "revocaine"... She's got electric boobs.”
Killian laughed so hard with tears in his eyes. “Boobs?”
Sometime after, Killian found himself singing alongside Emma on top of the bar, dancing and enjoying the moment.
The crowd had become a rapt audience to the pair cheering them on after an encore performance.
Killian helped Emma get off the bar table. Once she was at eye level she was so beautiful. He blurted out, “I wept like a babe at the Zimmer-York wedding.”
Emma’s eyes widened at his confession and without thinking she grabbed him by the shirt and pulled him to her, melding their lips together. The kiss escalated fast as they found themselves in the back seat of her car fogging the car windows with their heavy breathing.
The sunshine woke up Emma from her sleep. She was trying to shake off the kinks. She looked around the scenery and decided that there are worse places to end up stranded.
“Morning, love. The tow truck is on its way,” Killian said as he handed her a cup of coffee.”
“Thank you, I just want you to know I never do this.”
“I know, lass, you kept saying that last night over and over.”
Emma groaned, her head pounded. Why was everything so loud? While Killian acted as if he was a two-hundred-year-old pirate with an endless supply of rum.
“I was wondering if you would like to grab something to eat while we wait for the tow truck?”
They found a small diner just down the block and placed their food order when one of the patrons from the bar last night approached them and reminded them of the rendition to Benny and The Jets. Emma grimaces at the thought of singing in public. The man left with a smile on his face while humming the song.
“Oh, why didn’t you stop me?” Emma asked Killian.
“I’m sorry, you looked so free.”
“Hey, you’re that girl! You’re famous.” A customer approached her with recognition in her eyes. “From the newspaper.”
Emma looked confused at the lady. “What paper?”
Killian groaned and muttered, “ Bloody hell .”
The woman had gone to find the newspaper for her to see.
"Always, Always a Bridesmaid by James Rogers? What the hell is this?” She asked, throwing the newspaper on his face. Emma got up from her seat and walked out.
Killian followed her after he paid the bill.
“Emma! Swan, please let me explain. I told my editor not to run it. Lass, no one reads it,” Killian said as he caught up with her and grabbed her arm to get her attention.
Emma whipped around and slapped him. She walked away toward the car leaving him behind.
Killian knew better than to try to talk to her again.
Killian stormed into work to confront Cora, she had lied to him. He had been blindsided when the article was mentioned. The look of betrayal he saw in her eyes made his stomach sour.
Cora’s door was open.
Killian didn’t even bother with any sort of civility. “What the bloody hell happened? I thought we agreed to hold it,” Killian accused.
“I thought the story was ready and I make the decisions here you don’t,” She said coolly.
“Cora, you don't understand. I didn't have time to warn her.”
“In case you forgot. You work for me, not the other way around. You should kiss my feet. I gave you 24 inches in the Sunday paper. Get out !” she said unamused.
Emma arrived at her place to be greeted with a string of shrieks and screams. “How could you let this happen?”
“I didn’t know he was writing a story about me,” Emma said.
“You?! Did you read it? If Emma is the typical, accommodating bridesmaid then her sister, Kathryn, is cast as the overbearing, overindulged bride-to-be who might start stomping around Manhattan at any moment."
“I’m sorry.”
“Emma, he called me bridezilla in the New York Journal!”
Emma stayed quiet as Kathryn scolded her, missing the hurt in her eyes. The phone rang interrupting her tirade.
“What?” Kathryn answered the phone.
“May I please speak with Emma?” Killian asked.
“Are you kidding? The only person you will be speaking to is my attorney! Asshole!” Kathryn yelled at the phone and slammed it down.
The week had started horribly for Emma. Kathryn hadn’t stopped her complaints about the article when all Emma wanted to do was forget about it. Not once had Kathryn shown her an ounce of sympathy there had been so many embarrassing pictures of Emma on the front page of the section. Kathryn had only been mentioned but no one knew what her face looked like. Emma however, was the damn star. Her head was starting to pound. She still had to face Graham. What if he felt like her sister?
Killian had been relentless with the calls and messages. Of course Ruby tried to cheer her up by making light of the situation but it didn’t help.
Graham called her to his office and was so caring and understanding that it made her feel as if someone had her back. He was right, no one read that section.
Emma had to rush to the bridal shop for her meeting with Kathryn.
“Johanna, can you hem this part? Emma, is that you?” Kathryn called out from the fitting room. Johanna went to do the alteration.
“Yeah, it's me,” Emma said as she walked to the back.
Emma sat down on one of the chairs.
“Emma, I have been thinking that it wasn’t your fault. You are just too trusting. I guess,” Kathryn said as she checked her list.
“Thank you. Wait. Is that your enemy list? The one from high school. Are you checking me off the list?” Emma said dumbfounded.
Kathryn gave her a small smile alongside a paper. “About the slide show, I want you to say that. Exactly as I wrote it, that is the script. Graham said he will give you all his photos.”
“Okay,” Emma said as she read over the script her sister gave her.
Johanna walked back in with the altered dress, “Hi, Emma.”
“Hi, Johanna,” Emma said with a welcoming smile and returning her attention to the scripted paper her sister gave her.
“Kathryn, here it is. Step in.” Johanna said as she helped Kathryn with the dress.
“Emma, what do you think?” Kathryn said, twirling in the dress.
Emma finally looked up to see the dress, expecting to see her mother’s dress with some slight changes but instead finding a completely different dress. “I thought you were wearing Mom's dress.”
“This is Mom's dress. Parts of it anyway. It was just too old-fashioned. We could just use a few pieces here and there,”
Kathryn said as she smoothed the material.
“I’m sorry... what ?” Emma asked as she approached her sister wearing a dress she no longer recognized. “You cut up Mom’s dress ?”
“Isn’t it pretty? You can wear it too. Technically Johanna cut it, not me.”
Emma didn’t think her sister could be any more selfish; she was proven wrong. “ No. No, no, no, no. No! God, you don't care. You only care about yourself, don’t you? I have made excuses for you since Mom died but enough is enough!”
Kathryn rolled her eyes. “I don't know what you're talking about.”
“I can’t fix the dress but I won't let you hurt Graham. He thinks he knows you but it's all a lie. You even had Henry keep a secret from him. Tell him the truth or I will.”
“I don’t have to tell him anything and you will not either. You are my sister, you definitely wouldn't do anything to hurt me.”
“No, today you're just some selfish bitch who broke my heart and cut up my mother's wedding dress. You didn't even have the decency to ask me about it! You knew how much that dress meant to me but you just didn't care. You could have easily just picked a brand new dress to match your taste. Kathryn, you only get this warning, tell him the truth or a will.” Emma left her sister just staring at her back as she walked away.
Kathryn just groaned as she made her way to change her clothes.
On the day of the engagement party, Emma had been jittery all day but she wouldn’t be deterred from what she had to do. She gave her sister a chance to do the right thing, to be honest. She hoped she had come clean with Graham.
Emma had been getting pitying looks, and dealing with passive-aggressive comments about how terrible it must feel that her baby sister was marrying before her.
The last straw had Emma replying with, “ Yeah, but at least I still get to have hot sex with strangers .”
The stunned look on the old woman's face had been priceless.
The night progressed and it soon would be time for the slide show. Emma had kept trying to talk to Kathryn but her sister avoided her feigning she had to play host.
Ruby arrived fashionably late as always but quickly found Emma, a drink already in her hand. “Hey, you clean up nicely! You look hot! I might be persuaded to change sides,” she said with a wink.
Emma didn’t react with a quip of her own, making Ruby since her friend wasn’t holding up as well as she thought. “Emma, how are you?”
“I’m okay,” she said with a tight smile, grabbing the drink from Ruby’s hand while drinking it in one gulp.
“Hey, that is not water,” Ruby said as she saw her friend finish up to the last drop of her drink.
Emma turned to the guy helping her set up her computer for the slideshow. “It’s under Kathryn and Graham.”
“Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Yep, I’m fine,” Emma insisted.
Graham approached Emma with a reluctant fiance on his arm. “Emma, thank you for a lovely party. You have gone above and beyond. Hasn’t she, Kathryn?”
Kathryn nodded her agreement while avoiding Emma’s eyes.
Emma got the confirmation she needed with her sister’s attitude. “You guys should take a seat. I’m going to start the slideshow.”
The restaurant was packed with family and friends. Emma gave a lovely introduction as the images played in the background. It started with oohs and awws which morphed into gasps as Emma unmasked Kathryn from her preferred food to her dislike of pets which included Graham’s beloved dog Hunter. The final straw was Henry’s sell pitch for the cleaning business Kathryn was helping him, in which Graham’s home was the first customer.
Graham furiously got up from his seat and left with Kathryn following close behind trying to explain herself.
A crying Kathryn returned alone, walked up to Emma. “I hope you are happy. He broke off the engagement. The wedding is off.”
Emma saw as her sister walked away. Ruby nudged her shoulder. “What happened?”
“He deserved to know the truth.”
“I agree but perhaps you could have told him face-to-face when this mess started. I know that my moral compass doesn't exactly point due north but if I can see there’s something wrong, there’s a reason.”
“Ruby, you’re the one who is always telling me to be brave and stand up for myself,” Emma said, hurt at her friend’s attitude.
“Emma, hun that's not what you did. You unleashed years of repressed feelings in one night. I admit it was entertaining but if you were sure you did the right thing you'd feel better right now,” Ruby said honestly.
Emma walked out of the building, she heard footsteps approaching causing her to turn.
“Oh, my God. What do you want? Can't you take a hint? Why are you here?” she said, rolling her eyes at the intruder.
He shrugged, “Love, you wouldn't return my phone calls.”
“Haven't you ruined my life enough? Let me guess, you want another picture for your paper?”
“Emma, I’m sorry.”
“Please, Stop! You used me to advance in your career. At least have the decency to admit it but don’t try to act as you care about me.”
“I just saw what you did there and all I can say is it’s about bloody time!”
“Stop, I'm not doing this with you again.”
“Do you want to know the truth, why I came here? Alright, I knew this would be a difficult day for you, and for the first time in a long time, I wanted to look out for someone else. I know I was a damn fool. I’m sorry. I will vanish from your life but I want you to know that I think you are amazing, a marvel, and I think you deserve so much more than what you settle for. You deserve to be taken care of like the princess you are.” He turned to walk away but stopped mid-step. “Sorry, love. I forgot to give you this.” He hands her a package. “It’s just something to make your life easier. A new beginning.”
She took the gift hesitantly and watched him walk away.
Killian stared at his computer screen. He had hated walking away from Emma but it was clear she was not ready to forgive him.
“Killian, your little bridesmaid story got a phenomenal response. Looks like you finally did it, you got yourself bumped from Commitments,” Cora said.
“Lovely,” Killian said with a depreciating smile on his face.
“Killian, you should be happy. Isn’t this what you dreamt of?” Cora said as she walked away.
Killian knew she was right, he should be happy. He should be celebrating but it was a hollow victory.
Emma was surprised when her father called the day after and invited her over.
“Emma, you have got to work this out,” Midas said as he hugged her to comfort her pain.
“You two need to talk and fix this. Remember you love each other,” Midas said as if talking to two little girls with pigtails.
They stood stubbornly at opposite sides as their dad gave them privacy.
Emma had grown up looking after her sister. She had no idea what had caused Kathryn to become as selfish as she was. Kathryn had become the person that only looked out for herself. Emma had let go of her hurt over Graham because she had no idea of her feelings for him but the dress. The wedding dress was part of her dream wedding and she took it knowing so. Not only that but she shredded it without concerns about her feelings. But as Emma stared into her sister's eyes, she recognized the pain that had reflected in her own. She had done the unthinkable and caused pain to the one she had protected all her life.
“Kathryn, I’m sorry. I feel terrible.”
Kathryn’s mouth opened. “Sorry? You humiliated me in front of everyone!”
“I know but --” Emma stammered.
“Just admit it! You have always been jealous of me!” Kathryn yelled as she threw bags of chips and anything she could find at Emma.
Ducking and dodging various items being flung at her from the shelves, Emma became aggravated by Kathryn's child-like tantrum, but once she picked up a family-sized can of vegetables to throw, Emma snapped. “Stop it! Kathryn, I’m sorry but you could have been honest with Graham from the beginning. We wouldn't be standing here if you had. Did you even love him or was it just convenient?”
Kathryn huffed, “Get off your high horse. Sweet Emma, kind and smart. Perfect Emma. You always thought my life was perfect. The truth is you resent me because you had to braid my hair, go shopping for my prom dress, and make my Halloween costumes.”
Emma sighed. “No, Kathryn, I never did.”
“You think my life is so easy.”
“Kathryn, you never had a care in the world. You did as you pleased, never caring for the consequences. You are beautiful and fun. Your life is perfect.”
“You have no idea, Emma. Do you want to know the reason why I stayed home? I got fired from my job and James dumped me. Then I met Graham and he was nice to me. I just wanted to be someone worthy of him. I was trying to be you.”
Emma asked, confused, “Why would you want to be boring me when you get to be you?”
“Emma, you have taken care of me since Mom died. You stopped being my big sister and became my surrogate mother."
“I had to. You are my baby sister.”
"No, you didn't. I'm sorry about mom's dress. I know how much that dress meant to you. I wasn't thinking," Kathryn sighed. "I was too busy enjoying my happy moment. I didn't care about you or anyone. You were right calling me selfish. I just never thought I would hear those words coming from you. I will not lie and say it didn't hurt. In a way, I'm happy you finally started saying what you feel. I will always be your sister and I think it's time for you to stop taking care of everybody. It’s time to focus on you.”
"Kathryn, I am sorry for what I did. I never wanted to be the one to cause you pain."
The girls hug and start cleaning the mess.
Emma was at home cleaning out her closet. Finally taking the advice she had been given. She decided to start fresh.
The phone rang several times before she answered it. “Hello?”
The familiar voice on the other side greeted her warmly.
“Hi, Graham. I can do that. No problem. I'll be right there.” Emma rushed to get ready and meet Graham at the office. It was the least she could do after her stunt at the party.
Graham was sitting at his desk trying to find his speech for the benefit. He looked up and saw Emma walk in. She looked beautiful. He was not blind but he never wanted to cross that line.
“Emma, you look--great. Wow!” Graham said.
“Thank you,” Emma replied. “Before we go, I want to say sorry about last night. I shouldn't have done that.”
“Emma, you did me a favor. I was about to marry a woman I didn’t know. It’s not your fault I got swept away. Let’s forget about the whole thing.”
“Only if you’re sure.”
“I hate to ask for another favor but I need to print up my speech for tonight. I looked but I couldn't find the file.”
“Sure no problem. I can get it for you.” Emma walked to his desk to find the file.
Graham sighed in relief. “Emma, I’m so thankful I could call you tonight. I love that I can always count on you to never say no.”
Emma froze and looked at him. “What?”
“I'm sorry. Did I say something wrong?” He asked, concerned.
Emma sighed. “Oh--”
Graham approached her with concern.
Emma stared at the computer screen. “Graham, I quit.”
Graham’s face turned confused. “What do you mean?”
“You hired me right after college. I was so blown away and caught up by the company and you. I never bothered to get my own life. Then I couldn’t leave because I was so madly in love with you.”
He takes one fluid step into her space. His right hand sliding to the back of her head pulling her into a kiss.
Emma froze for a second waiting for the fireworks to explode but it was a dud.
Graham noticed her reaction and backed away. “I’m sorry, I don’t know what came over me.”
She looked at him with understanding. “It’s okay. I always wanted to know what it would feel like.”She took a deep breath. “I’m sorry, but that's not what it's supposed to feel like.” Her phone ringtone to Benny and the Jets went off interrupting them.
He smiled warmly as he saw her face brightened up with realization.
She smiled and left him behind.
Emma found the building easily enough. She approached the receptionist's desk interrupting a group of people deep in conversation. “Excuse me. I’m looking for Ki-James Rogers.”
The person that replied was a classically handsome man with a boyish quality and fair complexion with a bright smile. “He’s at a wedding. Wait, aren't you the girl from the article?”
Emma rolled her eyes. “Yeah, I’m famous.”
Emma had been pleasantly surprised at how accommodating the guy, Victor, had been. He quickly provided the information to her with a smirk.
Emma ran out of the building hailing a cab.
The taxi came to a screeching stop.
Emma opened the door and got in. “Pier 17,” she said looking forward while waiting for the car to move.
The face of the cabbie that drove her the night she met Killian smiled through the rearview mirror. “I only have one dress tonight.”
The man grumbled in disappointment as the possibility of some extra cash disappeared and started driving.
They arrived shortly at the destination. Emma rushed out of the cab noticing the venue’s wedding sign, and asked the two valet workers to point her in the right direction.
Emma easily found the wedding on a ship and it was about to depart. Emma didn’t think twice and just jumped landing on the gangplank.
She landed safely, taking a deep breath and she started her search for Killian. The wedding was lovely. She was amazed by the magical feel of it.
“Hey,” a voice called out from behind her, Emma turned to face the voice.
The tiny blonde with a big smile greeted her. “I know you from the article. What are you doing here?”
“Yeah, that’s me.” Emma grimaced; she only hoped the bride was a romantic. “Long story short. There's this guy and he is here and I ...” Flustered at her own boldness Emma confided her story to the pixie bride who eagerly helped her.
Emma took the microphone nervously at the encouragement of her new friend.
“Hello. Good evening, I’m sorry to interrupt such a happy occasion. I promise this won't take long. I’m looking for someone, Killian? Killian Jones?”
The groom arrived and stood next to his bride, “Love, what’s going on?”
The bride said, “Shhh. Don’t worry, this is a good thing.”
Killian heard his name in a familiar voice and muttered, “Oh, bloodiest of hells…”
The Bride grabbed the mic from Emma’s grasp. “Can we have a spotlight, please? Killian Jones, come forward.” With an encouraging smile, she returned the microphone to Emma.
Killian begrudgingly stepped forward. The spotlight landed on him as the bride pointed him out.
Emma’s eyes met his and she continued to lower her armor. “I just wanted to say you were right about me. I wasn’t ready to hear it, especially not from you. I waited all my life for my prince charming. Then you showed up, a scoundrel, a pirate. The truth is, fighting with you is the best thing that ever happened to me. I think the chances of me falling in love with you are very good. That's all I had to say. I'll go now.”
Emma made her way through the crowd to meet Killian in the middle.
Killian smiled as she hesitantly arrived a few steps in front of him. “It’s about bloody time,” he said, pulling her as close to him as possible before he kissed her soundly.
After a few minutes of enjoying their kissing session, they are separated after hearing someone clear their throat.
“Little brother, I thought I taught you better manners. How about introducing me to the lovely lass that crashed my wedding to profess her feelings to you?”
“Leave them alone, Liam. They have a lot to talk about.”
“They can talk all they want but I feel like we deserve at least an introduction.”
Killian rolled his eyes as he hesitantly made space between Emma and himself. “Emma, this is my elder brother, Liam Jones. You have met my new sister-in-law, Olivia, but you can call her Tink.”
Emma’s eyes widened. “I’m sorry I interrupted your wedding. I wasn’t thinking. I never do stuff like this.”
Tink laughed, “It’s okay: you’re family.”
Killian shook his head. “Tink, I didn't know you were so intent on helping me find something as precious as my happy ending.”
A year later…
After quitting her job, Emma opened her wedding planner business: Savior Weddings. Soon enough, she found herself planning for a very special day.
You are cordially invited to the union of Emma Swan and Killian Jones.
Kathryn was the maid of honor, she smiled at her new boyfriend Frederick. A kind man that she met at her father’s store. He sat on the bride’s side.
Graham and his date Elsa arrived at the wedding with an excited Henry who happily tagged along for the special occasion. They were seated in the bride’s section.
Tink sat excitedly on the Groom’s side. She was so happy her brother-in-law found happiness.
Ruby smiled widely as she guided guests to their seats.
“Excuse me, what do you think makes this wedding special?” a voice got her attention.
Ruby turned to the source and smiled wolfishly. “And who are you?”
He smirked. “I’m the new writer of the Commitments column for the Journal, Victor Whale. I was hoping I could buy you a drink later.”
She laughed, “You do know it’s an open bar, right? I'll buy you a drink.” She winked and walked away. It was almost time for the ceremony to start.
Liam was happily standing next to his little brother as the music started. He joked saying he earned being the best man since his bride crashed his wedding.
Emma glided down the aisle. Her father proudly escorted her.
At that moment she didn't care if everything was perfect or not because the only thing that mattered was the way Killian looked at her, full of love. She looked at her bridesmaids. All twenty-seven of them were there to support her.
Once she arrived at her spot next to Killian he smiled lovingly as he asked her, “Is this moment everything you had hoped for?”
She beamed with happiness.“It’s so much more.”
Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join Emma Swan and Killian Jones in holy matrimony. Marriage is a cause for celebration… I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.
The 27 Brides:
1 Lily/August
2 Alice/Robyn
3 Astrid/Leroy
4 Victoria/Flynn
5 Mary Margaret/David
6 Ariel/Eric
7 Aurora/Phillip
8 Ashley/Sean
9 Belle/Gaston
10 Anastacia/Will
11 Anna/Kristoff
12 Merida/Mulan
13 Gwen/Lance
14 Marian/Robin
15 Zelena/Hades
16 Tiana/Naveen
17 Regina/Daniel
18 Jacqueline/James
19 Nimue/Merlin
20 Jasmine/Aladdin
21 Wendy/Felix
22 Megara/Hercules
23 Cruella/Isaac
24 Fiona/Malcolm
25 Tamara/Greg
26 Ivy/Henry
27 Priscilla/Jefferson
Tagging:
@allons-y-to-hogwarts-713 @andiirivera @anothersworld @apiratewhopines @artistic-writer @batana54 @beckettj @bethacaciakay @bixisarusher @branlovestowrite @brooke-to-broch @captainodonoghue @carpedzem @chasedancer17 @cocohook38 @courtorderedcake @darkcolinodonorgasm @deckerstarblanche @demisexualemmaswan @djlbg @donteattheappleshook @dovelyheart @elizabeethan @gingerchangeling @gingerpolyglot @holdingoutforapiratehero @hollyethecurious @hookedonapirate @hookedonaswanprincess @hookedonhiddles​ @ilovemesomekillianjones​ @imlaxdris71​ @itsfabianadocarmo​ @jarienn972 @jennjenn615​ @jonesfandomfanatic​ @jrob64 @justanother-unluckysoul​ @k-leemac​ @karlyfr13s​ @kday426 @killian-will-do​ @klynn-stormz​ @kmomof4​ @kwistowee​ @kymbersmith-90​ @laschatzi​ @lassluna​ @let-it-raines​ @lfh1226-linda @lonelyspectator12 @mariakov81 @motherkatereloyshipper​ @officerrogers​ @ohmakemeahercules​ @onceratheart18​ @pirateherokillian​ @purplehawkcaptain​ @queen-serena88 @resident-of-storybrooke​ @revanmeetra87​ @rumdrum91 @sailtoafarawayland​ @sals86 @scientificapricot​ @scribomaniac​ @searchingwardrobes​ @seriouslyhooked​ @shardminds​ @shireness-says​ @snowbellewells​ @spacekrulesbians​ @spartanguard​ @stahlop​ @superchocovian​ @swanslieutenant​ @tehgreeneyes​ @the-darkdragonfly​ @thejollyroger-writer​ @therealstartraveller776 @thesschesthair​ @thislassishooked​ @thisonesatellite​ @tiganasummertree​ @tomeandflickcorner​ @ultraluckycatnd​ @veryverynotgoodwrites​ @wefoundloveunderthelight​ @wellhellotragic​ @whimsicallyenchantedrose​ @winterbaby89​ @winterbythesea​ @xemmaloveskillianx​ @xarandomdreamx​ @xsajx​ @zaharadessert​
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ladyeliot · 3 years
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It’s been a long, long time 
Pairing: Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader
Summary: You never knew what fate had in store for you, as if it was testing what it had offered you one day it took away from you the next. It was almost four years after Steve gave himself up to save the world, but you had never given up hope of being with him again.
Warnings: Angst. Disappearance. Fluff ending.
Word count: 2883
A/N: Captain America First Avenger / Avengers Endgame. Some of the dialogue is taken from the film. Sorry for my spelling and grammatical mistakes, English is not my native language, I am learning.
Song: It’s been a long, long time - Harry James
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1949.
The rumours of his possible return were fading with time, but hopes were not falling.
Nearly four years had passed since the end of the Second World War, and the consequences were soon felt worldwide, especially by those who had survived that tragic period. You had been present from start to finish, being a potent participant in the covert operations linking the US and the UK. Although you had not been on the front line fighting as a soldier, you had been on the front line commanding the actions they would take. In 1939 you became a member of the British Royal Military, then a recommendation from a superior officer led to you joining the Special Operations Executive, a British spy agency, changing your destiny, causing MI5 to contact you, and then you were seconded to the Strategic Scientific Reserve, a top-secret Allied war agency during World War II, created by President Roosevelt. Too many things happened in a single year, too many things that would change the course of your history, but the most important was yet to happen.
In 1943 you were assigned to Colonel Chester Phillips' training base, known as Camp Lehigh, where you were assigned to supervise the candidate division of Project Renaissance, the project that changed everything. Project Renaissance was a highly secret project run by the United States Government. Its aim was to create super soldiers to be deployed during World War II against the Axis powers, thus having a great advantage in strategic warfare, however things didn't go as planned and they only had one success, a young man from Brooklyn named Steve Rogers.
You could never deny that you didn't notice him the first moment you saw him, he instantly caught your attention in two ways. The first of them was his physical shape, he stood out for his small stature compared to the other cadets, and his physical appearance looked sickly, although his medical record didn't say anything about it. On the other hand, the other aspect that impressed and inspired you was his courage and endurance to face each of the tests they had to pass, as well as his cunning, all of which won you over, as well as the generals of the project, as he was selected for the Renaissance project. The time you spent together at Camp Leigh made you realise the determination and humility he possessed, traits that the other members of the group, or any other man you had met before, possessed only to a slight degree.
The day the experiment was carried out, that is, the injection of the Super Soldier serum into Steve was another turning point in your life, the young man who went into that machine was not the same as the one who would come out of it, at least for everyone present, a human being went in and a super soldier came out, although for you he was still the same Steve Rogers with 30 centimetres more height and greater muscle mass. From then on he became the secret weapon that would overthrow Hitler, as the leader of the project, Dr. Erskine, was killed which meant that Steve was the only one of his kind.
You would have liked to have been able to say that your relationship was moving towards a more effective environment, but you were really living in a period of war, plus your character did not easily fit in with the word love, it never really did, or rather, you had never shown any interest in any man. You were rude, you had suffered enough harassment in your job, a job by and for men, to become insensitive in several cases. You were selective with your friends and also with the people you could trust, that's why every time you felt any affection for someone you stopped it, and that's what happened with Steve at the beginning.
Frankly, there were not too many moments to show your affection for each other, nor to enrich it, but every occasion that brought you together, there were certain feelings in the air that were never expressed in words. You encouraged him to be more than a lab rat or a fair hand for the soldiers at the front, you also helped him from your position with the missions, which after his triumph in rescuing the soldiers of the 107th infantry, were assigned to him. You complemented each other, you understood each other in many aspects that no one had ever understood, you had faith in him and he in you, that is why deep inside you were waiting for the day when the war would end to discover what it would be like to be able to dance with him without any worries around you, but it was not that simple.
As if the universe itself was mocking you, everything it had offered you was taken away in a breath. Even if you had never extrapolated it, your heart shrank every time he marched on a mission in enemy territory, you used to find yourself behind the controls of the base of operations that commanded his missions waiting for his voice or news from him to indicate what the situation was, but the last time what you saw was different. It was all a consequence of your attack on HYDRA HQ, you had worked out a strategy to take out their leader, the Red Skull, Steve was inside and you later came in with the assault guard and became part of the operation. Things had gone a little shaky during the operation, as the Red Skull managed to gain access to a ship and almost escaped from the place, but at that moment you appeared as if you were a breath of air together with Colonel Chester Phillips to offer him the last chance for Steve to finish him off and gain access to the inside of the ship that was about to escape, but not before sharing your first and last kiss. Every day you remember the last words you said to him in person "Go get him." before watching him jump into the plane and disappear into the snowy mountains.
After that, the ship became a direct path to death unbeknownst to you. A few hours later, from the command post, you managed to maintain a direct connection with the ship, specifically with Steve who was still inside it.
"Come in. This is Captain Rogers. Do you read me?" you all heard from the intercom.
"Steve, is that you? Are you alright?" your heart raced as it did every time he was away from you on a mission.
"Y/N! Schmidt's dead.
That brought a breath of relief that neither of you had experienced for a long time, you could see a little light at the end of the tunnel that was getting closer and closer to you, but what you heard next put the light out again.
"What about the plane?" you asked still worried about his situation.
"That's a little bit tougher to explain," Steve's words were choppy.
It really was complicated, the plane was loaded with explosive devices and was clearly headed for New York City, that meant there was only one possibility and you all knew what it was. You tried to talk him out of it, to find a new solution, but time was running out.
"Y/N, this is my choice," a lump formed in your throat at those words. "Y/N?"
"I'm here," you managed to say with watery eyes and a hand to your lips.
"I'm gonna need a rain check on that dance," you heard through the intercom, as a sharp gust of air rushed in between his words.
"Alright," you hid a soft sob. "A week, next Saturday, at the Stork Club."
"You got it," he said firmly, making it seem real that he was going to show up there on Saturday.
"Eight o'clock on the dot. Don't you dare be late. Understood?"
"You know, I still don't know how to dance," a wistful smile appeared on your face at his words.
"I'll show you how. Just be there," you said almost begging him.
"We'll have the band play somethin' slow," Steve picked up the pace of his words, "I'd hate to step on your...
That was the last time you heard his voice, the line connecting the intercom to Steve went static with a soft continuous noise, that's when the tears flowed freely down your cheeks.
"Steve? Steve? Steve?"
Of course, life puts us all to the test, we believe we need redemption for the acts committed in the past, that often makes us lose hope that better times will come.  Almost four years have passed since those last events, since you shared your first and last kiss with your Captain America, since you heard his last words and since you felt that thing called love. Now your life had been turned upside down, you had dreamed for too long of meeting him, of seeing his face again and not only through those war films, but your life went on and you couldn't keep yourself stuck thinking about him, that's why you had decided to leave the Strategic Scientific Reserve and go into a new project with Howard Stark, called S.H.I.E.L.D.
It was unusual for the month of January to have that warm morning out, although it was actually quite comforting as it had brightened up your day, and even when you got home you opted to start cooking to the rhythm of whatever song was playing on the radio, which was unusual for you. The open windows allowed the sun's rays to stream into the living room, offering that homely touch that the little house in the middle of a residential neighbourhood lacked. Due to your countless projects and missions in the SSR you had not been able to enjoy home life as much as you would have liked, although it was really your decision, that house was too quiet and too big for you alone, although the radio offered you the company you sometimes needed.
As if it were a special event you had brought out the table linen and arranged the table in the parlour to eat there for the first time, normally you used the table in the kitchen, for you did not waste too much time on your meals, but this day was a new beginning, a new year, a good time to work out new habits. You opted to open a bottle of wine, which had been a gift from your dear friend Howard Stark, and poured yourself a glass while you waited for the chicken to make its acquaintance in the oven. The rhythmic melody of Nat King Cole along with your glass of wine lifted spirits that hadn't been this high for some time.
"Love is all that I can give to you," you intoned as you walked around the kitchen.
The midday seemed to be going smoothly, until a crashing noise from the front door brought you to a screeching halt. "Ogh, Mrs. Foster," you said to yourself before taking a sip from your glass of wine to fill your spirits. Mrs Foster was the neighbour from across the street who was always knocking on your door whenever she could, hoping to whisper about the other neighbours and glean as much information about you as possible, the funny thing was that she always barged in at the most inopportune times.
"I'm coming!" you exclaimed, taking off your apron and placing it on the counter. "I'm there!"
When you reached the front door you took five seconds to exhale the air inside you, position your dress correctly, take another breath, roll your eyes and expose a wide grin before you very quickly lowered the door handle. We've been talking before about all the turning points that changed your life and shaped your destiny, okay, that was one of them, maybe the most important one of all, the one that set the rest of your life on track.
"Hello Mrs. Fos-!"
Your voice disappeared, your vocal cords seemed to break at that moment, your wide, false smile also vanished as if it had never been on your face, your eyes seemed to have no eyelids and your lungs ran out of air, leaving you breathless. What you saw when you opened that door was your whole life, every moment appeared in front of you as if it were a frame. They say that happens when you are about to die, but it happened to you when the person you had loved had returned from the dead and was prostrate before you. You couldn't tell whether your reaction was the most humane or what someone else would have done in your place because you had never met anyone who had. Soldiers sometimes took long months to return home after the war ended, but it had taken Steve almost four years to do so.
Perhaps there had been hundreds or thousands of times you had imagined that moment, and now you didn't know what to do, your limbs were stiff, you were grateful for it or you would have collapsed in those moments. You kept holding the doorknob tightly, while he stood there on your porch staring at you, not knowing what to do. They were the longest minutes of your whole life, or maybe they were only a few seconds, you didn't know how time worked in those moments, but that didn't matter, your emotions recovered when you looked into his eyes, those blue eyes that you had dreamed of so many nights and they were watery, that was the sign that told you that this was not a dream, it was real life.
The air opened again and passed through your lungs in the form of a gasp, you shared the wateriness of his eyes in yours and in a moment you were wrapped in his arms. You could feel him again, or rather you could feel him around you for the first time. His arms were around your back bringing your body closer to his.
"You're... here." you murmured against his chest almost afraid that your words would make him disappear again.
"I'm home," he whispered against your forehead before kissing it and pulling away to look at your face.
It really was him, you noticed the odd changed feature, as if the years had passed him by more quickly, but there was no doubt that it was Steve. He placed his hands on your cheeks cradling your face, that sensation made you close your eyes as you placed your hands on his. Gingerly, you felt his breath collide against you and the longing for his lips that had haunted you for so many years came to an end.
"I'm sorry," he whispered, leaning his forehead against yours.
"No, you're home," you murmured, taking his hand and bringing his palm to your lips.
The open windows of the living room let out the melody of the radio, as if it were one of those Hollywood feature films with its own soundtrack. For a few long minutes you stood there on the porch of your house, oblivious to everything around you, oblivious to curious stares or if the chicken was burning in the oven, there was nothing more relevant than the two of you.
After a few minutes without taking your eyes off each other you took his hand and went inside your home, there were no unnecessary questions, no comments that could break the moment, your gazes were pleased to observe each other and as if your thoughts were connected and the person in charge of playing the songs on the radio knew it, one of Steve's favourite songs began to play. Harry James' voice came into the room, giving you the moment you had wanted for four years in your case, but for Steve it had been many more. 
“Never thought that you would be
Standing here so close to me
There's so much I feel that I should say
But words can wait until some other day”
His arm found position around your waist and your face found position on his chest. You listened to his heartbeat work to the rhythm of the melody, you could never have imagined ever feeling like this again, you would have made a pact with the devil on too many occasions to feel it. It was so unreal that you had to lift your face from his chest to look at his face again, to find out if it really was Steve in front of you, it was. 
“Kiss me once, then kiss me twice
Then kiss me once again
It’s been a long, long time
Haven't felt like this, my dear
Since I can't remember when
It’s been a long, long time”
Life had offered you a new opportunity to enjoy it together, and you were never going to miss it.
“You'll never know how many dreams
I've dreamed about you
Or just how empty they all seemed without you
So kiss me once, then kiss me twice
Then kiss me once again
It's been a long, long time”
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jadelotusflower · 3 years
Text
Robin Hood Rewatch: 2x06 For England!
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Almost at the halfway point of the season, and things are really ramping up - Allan is transitioning to team Castle, Robin is in full blown solider (assassin) mode, and Marian is (sigh) yet again under the threat of sexual assault. And of course, more silly disguises, but perhaps the less said about those hats the better!
Another opener, another one of the Sheriff’s contractors murdered.
How did the gang find Allan’s secret stash? They got to it first, so they couldn’t have just been tracking him.
The Pact is being signed for King Richard’s birthday, which is the 8 September - we find out later that Robin’s birthday is 14 October, which means the events of 2x06-2x012 take place over less than a month. I mean, if any of the writers cared about such things, which I suspect they didn’t. But from memory, it doesn’t seem preposterous - things are moving quickly as tensions are escalating. It also means that we’re a year on from the events of 1x08, which also took place on Richard’s birthday. It kind of works, even if they are living in Sherwood, the Land of Endless Summer.
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Djaq’s face this entire scene. She’s the only one who doesn’t hurl accusations at Allan, just gives a sad shake of the head.
And...Robin’s off on his own again.
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Marian’s new wardrobe, Guy clearly doing his shopping at the peasant woman’s Laura Ashley store we saw in 2x01. Other than the blue dress she’s holding, I don’t think she wears any of these, does she?
Guy makes it clear he’s actively pursuing her again, the suspicion of a few episodes ago conveniently forgotten.
Marian’s hairpins: useful as weapons and lockpicks.
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Robin’s disguises: once again, a hood and an accent. “Be meek and obedient, my child” with a wink is cute, however.
I actually love the dress Marian’s wearing in these scenes, but we never really get a good look at it.
I wish I had more to say about Edward, but I don’t. He’s just there.
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And it’s Wedge Antilles! Commander of Rogue Squadron, Red Leader, General of the New Republic himself. Denis Lawson great in this role.  I also very much enjoy him as Captain Foster in Hornblower.
Alright, so Robin at this point still doesn’t know that Roger of Stoke was intercepted (aka killed). I actually appreciate that this is a plot point that has been ongoing for several episodes.
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Much has been in this outfit for most of the season (but this is the first really good shot of it) - it’s actually Robin’s vest that he wore early in season 1, let out a little at the sides. I really love the attention to detail here, in that the gang would of course be repurposing clothes, and that it’s Much in particular that would be getting Robin’s hand me downs.
It’s nice when we get to see how clever Will is - forward thinking about signing the gang up as musicians and making the instruments.
“They’re just bells.” John’s face! Then the payoff with the guards - “bells, mate” (ring ring).
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Allan’s still got a bit of grey in his costume - he hasn’t fully made the switch yet. It does seem that Allan’s initial plan was to flee with his hoard, but when the gang found it first, he chooses to go to Guy for employment rather than leave Nottingham.
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Sorry this is an image heavy post, but John’s tag is completely visible in this scene! Where was the continuity editor? Where was the director? I mean, it’s not craft service coffee cups, but jeez.
Is this the first time we learn that Marian’s mother’s name was Kate? Or that she’s even been mentioned?
Sussex. Sussex. Sussex? Sussex. SUSSEX!
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For all of Guy’s talk earlier that he’s gaining more power, he can’t save Marian, and he can’t save Allan - his “power” exists only in exercising Vaisey’s will, he has none of his own.
I will however give him credit for the instinct to try and get Marian out of the castle - perhaps the only honourable thing he’s done so far, in that he thinks of her welfare before his own in arranging her escape without any promise of reward.
But...of course it doesn’t last. Now, Vaisey clearly has some kind of psychological hold over Guy, and the scene between them is incredibly creepy, as Guy seems almost hypnotised while Vaisey invades his personal space and gives slow deliberate orders. He makes no threats, his words are actually quite benign, but there’s a sinister undertone to the whole thing.
But still, Guy ultimately chooses Vaisey over Marian - as he will do again at the end of the season. He allows Marian to be chained at the wrists and taken to Winchester - and it’s interesting that Vaisey leaves him in control of this. At this point, Guy still could have facilitated Marian’s escape, Vaisey isn’t there watching to make sure he does what he wants, he let’s Guy make the choice, he’s so certain of his own control over Guy. Vaisey is such an astute judge of character (well, men - he always underestimates women), and master manipulator.
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Meanwhile, Robin’s also making the choice not to confide in or seek help from his gang, instead taking up the role of assassin himself, and there’s a lot going on in that. We know Robin is the kind of commander who will always throw himself into the fray first, put his life on the line before those of his followers, and in a way it’s reminiscent of 1x02 where Robin made sure his men were safe on the other side of the portcullis before fighting off the remaining guards single-handedly. But we’re a way from half-showoff, half-deathwish Robin now - this choice is calculated (but still reckless). He sees his role as captain to protect his soliders, not the other way around, and he thinks its a suicide mission and doesn’t want to risk their lives.
He tells Edward “I have no choice” but at this point Robin has lots of choices. Because he should tell the gang what is going on, not leave them in the dark, he should seek their counsel, and accept their help. But he doesn’t, because for all the justification he’s cloaking himself in, he knows it’s a terrible thing and while he’s willing to bear the burden (after likely doing much worse in the Holy Land), he’s not willing to let the gang bear it with him. But also - he’s not willing to let the gang talk him out of it either, which they would certainly try to do. He’s in war mode and his only objective is to eliminate the enemy the most effective way he knows how - to turn off the humanity in himself and let the solider take over.
Allan, Guy, and Robin are again falling back on their old patterns - Allan to talk his way into the most advantageous position possible (and survive), Guy cede control to Vaisey (and further his ambition), and Robin to act recklessly (and protect his King). All of these cycles are self-destructive, and only really Allan will be able to break free from his by the end of the season.
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Not the face of a rational man. If he’d talked things over with the gang first, things might have been different.
There are lines of Robin’s letter that are (inadvertent) foreshadowing - “but most of all for the life, for the love we could not have” and “I’ll see you in heaven.” Debatable whether Robin genuinely believes the latter (given he’s about to commit some mortal sins without the opportunity to repent), or whether he says it for Marian’s comfort.
Very lucky Robin didn’t aim for anyone’s head - but Vaisey would know he would go for the heart, the most effective kill shot.
CONDENDER, READY? GLADITATOR, READY? 3...2...1...
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Both Robin (righteous anger) and Allan (seething resentment) are being unreasonable here. Robin: “You don’t have to do this” - and do what instead, exactly? Allan: “You should have given me a second chance.” Well, he did. It’s Allan who swings first, and wins, thanks to Robin’s distraction at seeing Marian in chains - but he doesn’t go in for the kill swing, and I don’t think he would have, actually.
Tar and fire - weren’t we here three weeks ago?
First John disarms Guy with his quarterstaff, then distracts him with the bells, then hits him in the groin. What a legend.
It bothers me when they all tell Much to shut up and it’s played for laughs. Really, this scene should have been the gang giving Robin the what for about going off alone and making suicide-shaped plans without them, but it also makes sense they don’t want to rub salt in the wound.
A dark end to the episode, a sign of things to come.
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wienerbarnes · 3 years
Text
Much Ado About Nothing (3/6)
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Pairing: Bucky x Reader
Word Count: 2,357
Warnings: enemies to lovers, au series, some DRAMAAAAAA
A/N: this chapter is where it gets JUICYYYYY YALLLLLL
MAIN MASTERLIST | MUCH ADO MASTERLIST
“I’ll go on and check out the situation in Italy after the wedding.” Sam says, talking with Steve, Bucky, and Tony about talk of an underground HYDRA facility. Guess I spoke too soon about a break, Bucky thinks.
“I’ll go with you.” Steve promises him, aligned with the promises of a Captain and leader.
“Please, I’m not taking you away from your new marriage and wife like that. I’ll take Bucky with me, he’s single and Cupid seems like he’ll be staying away from him for a while.” Sam teases.
The three men await Bucky’s response; his usual wit, his banter with Sam, an insult, a comeback. But nothing comes. Only a dismissive hum as Bucky doesn’t meet any of their eyes.
“Should… Should I repeat myself? Did I not stick the execution?” Sam asks.
“I’ve… changed over the last couple days.” Bucky starts, unsure of how to approach his feelings, especially to his close friends, two of which are already in committed relationships with their feelings already figured out.
“You know, you do seem more serious. You shaved your beard and everything.” Tony agrees.
“I hope he’s in love.” Steve wishes aloud.
“Oh c’mon. There’s no love in this guy’s heart.” Sam disagrees.
“I think he’s in love.” Steve continues.
“The clean shaven look really makes you look younger, Barnes.” Tony compliments, both him and the Captain ignoring Sam’s logic in the situation and choosing their own thoughts to pay attention to.
“Yeah, c’mon, Sam, when has Bucky ever shaved his beard?” Steve points out.
“Alright, alright, enough. Tony… Can I talk to you about something?” Bucky asks, and Tony nods his head, motioning for the two of them to talk elsewhere.
As they walk away, heading for another part of the building, Sam and Steve excitingly face each other.
“Do you think he’s going to go talk to him about Techie?” Sam asks.
“I hope so; Bucky’s one of the hardest guys to read.”
Their brief conversation is interrupted when someone else enters the room. Sam turns to greet his brother as John sends the two of them a polite smile.
“Hey, Sam.” John greets him as Sam throws an enthusiastic arm around his shoulder.
“What’s up, Johnny?”
“I was wondering if I could talk to you about something.” John begins.
“In private?”
“Well, Captain Rogers can stay, as it kind of concerns him, too.” He explains, and Steve cocks his head in confusion.
“What’s the matter, kid?” Steve asks.
“Are you still planning on getting married tomorrow?” John asks him, and Sam answers, growing suspicious of his younger brother’s behavior.
“You know that he is.” Sam tells him.
“Well, I don’t know if he is after he finds out what I know,” John argues.
“Spit it out, John.” Steve commands.
John pauses and Steve urges him on, “If there’s any reason you think I shouldn’t get married, then you should tell me.”
“She’s unfaithful.” He finally spits out.
“Who, Sharon?” Steve asks.
“Yes.”
“Is that possible?” Steve turns to Sam, asking his best friend to tell him that his brother is lying.
“No, it’s not. John, where the hell did you get that stupid idea?” Sam scolds him.
“I saw it with my own eyes, man, I’m telling you. If you don’t believe me, meet me in the lab tonight, and I’ll show you all the proof you need.”
“This is stupid.” Sam repeats.
“Okay, okay. I’ll meet you in the lab and if I see something tonight, I’ll talk to Sharon tomorrow, before the wedding.” Steve compromises.
“You’re seriously having doubts?” Sam asks incredulously.
“Sam, what reason would your kid brother have to lie to me about this?” Steve defends.
Seeing as his work here is done, John slips out of the room. The seed has been planted. He’d been thinking of ways to sabotage the wedding, just to spice things up in the tower a bit. He thought about childish pranks, like loosening some of the chairs in the ballroom, or sneaking into the kitchen to put laxatives in the food. Maybe hiring a stranger to object, or setting off the sprinklers in the middle of the event. The possibilities are endless.
But he soon realized that none of these things would actually ruin the wedding. Seeing the way these people act around each other, they’d make a show of whatever problems arise, celebrating them even more. John doesn’t want that.
He needed to think deeper. He needed to cause a problem at the root: their relationship. So, he discussed with some other interns on the team who also share his disdain for the Avengers.
Leila and Kennedy Gordon are the ones that agreed to his plan. A married couple themselves, but the difference is that they value professionalism in the workplace, just as John does. It’s time that the Avengers are humbled and realize they don’t stand at the center of the universe, and that the world doesn't revolve around them.
The couple will be staged in one of the spare rooms of the tower; one of the spare rooms whose window is visible from a spot in the lab stations. John is lucky that Leila fits the build and stature of Sharon Carter, same hair style and length, too. In the dark of the night, their silhouettes will simulate Steve’s beloved fiancée caught in an interesting predicament with another man.
If John succeeds, the wedding will surely be canceled, finally serving the much-needed reminder that the Avengers are not as invincible as they think they are.
Tony and Bucky stroll silently through the open lot of the hangar. Tony knows Bucky’s about to unload on him about all his undecided feelings, but decides to let him come out with it on his own. It has been about seven minutes of silence, though, and Tony’s started to feel uncomfortable.
“When did you know you loved Pepper? I mean, you guys have been together for so long now, and have known each other even longer.” Bucky finally asks, not looking at him.
“Well, I’ve always loved her, it was just a matter of me realizing it for myself. Same with her, I suppose.”
“Yeah, but, what made you… know? Like what happened that made you realize?”
“Barnes, there’s no big red arrow pointing out the exact moment. It just happens.”
“Ugh, but that doesn’t help me, Tony!” Bucky stops, rubbing a hand over face, becoming frustrated.
“Well, maybe if you told me a little about what’s going on instead of asking me these impossibly complex questions with impossibly complex answers, I could help you better.”
“I take it, you think you love someone?” Tony asks.
Bucky finally meets his eyes in a silent answer. He rolls his eyes, though, when Tony starts grinning like an idiot.
“Tony, stop.”
“C’mon, Mister-Sworn-to-Celibacy has finally found himself a girl and you expect me to not make fun of him?”
“Okay, definitely not sworn to celibacy -”
“Doesn’t matter. Who is it?”
“What?”
“What do you mean what? Tell me who the girl is.”
“...No. You’ll tell everybody.” Bucky says, immediately seeming to shrink down, shyness crowding his body like a middle schooler talking about his crush.
“So what? You know what, it doesn’t even matter. I already know who it is.” Tony claims.
“What? Who?” Bucky asks. He only figured it out himself a few days ago, how does Tony know?
“The webmonkey in my lab.” Tony tells him, rather than guesses.
How does he know?!
Bucky doesn’t have time to object or tell him otherwise before Tony gives him that shit-eating smile again. Bucky rolls his eyes once more, knowing now that Tony definitely knows.
“How did you even know? Has she told you anything?” Bucky asks now, curious.
“No, she hasn’t. But she doesn’t have to. I have eyes.” Tony says simply.
Sharon and Nat occupy the private tailor in the tower as Sharon tries on her wedding dress, Nat offering different accessories for Sharon to choose from. Bows, lace, diamonds, earrings, bracelets, and of course, the type of garter she will wear on her thigh underneath the dress.
You walk in, with coffee as you’d promised the two other ladies, and they greet you.
“What’s got you all giddy?” Sharon asks, gratefully taking the coffee.
“Yeah, you hate all this lovey-dovey stuff.” Nat agrees.
“What, I can’t be happy for my best friend?” You ask, not ready for an interrogation right now.
“Mhm.” Sharon hums incredulously.
“I think you need some Jameson.”
“Jameson? Is there some kind of double meaning there?” You ask, surprised by her word choice.
Sharon and Nat glance at each before looking back at their friend.
“All I meant was that I think you need a drink. Why, would it have a double meaning?” Nat asks, knowing smile teasing her lips.
“No!” You answer quickly, hoping that the conversation will change. You’re really not ready to talk about all your feelings right now.
“Is there a special James in your life?” Sharon teases.
“No -”
“I think that you think that we think you’re in love. Which we do.” Nat confirms.
“But -”
“You know, Bucky didn’t believe in love just like you did. But he’s changed, and now he’s allowed himself to love someone ungrudgingly. And even though you think you don’t deserve it, I think you should do the same. How we’ll convince you to do that, I have no idea,” Sharon trails off.
There’s a pause of silence as both you and Nat take in Sharon’s serious words.
“I think I really like Bucky. I don’t know about love. But I’m allowing myself to admit that much.” You finally admit in a quiet voice. You don’t meet their eyes, even though you feel their stares. This is probably the most vulnerable you’ve been in front of them.
Even when you’ve gotten out of bad relationships, going to Sharon and Nat for comfort, you never allowed yourself to open up too much. You knew that you’d always heal, always get back up from your internal wounds, and always knew that things would pass. You never whined to them, rarely cried, and for you to admit your honest feelings to them was… a lot.
Sharon and Nat can’t help but celebrate, though.
Girlish squeals are heard among your annoyed groans as they crowd you, enveloping you in a hug, the poofs of Sharon’s dress nearly suffocating you.
You suppose you’d rather suffocate via lace than love, though.
It’s late at night when Sam and Steve go to meet John in a private station in the lab. Sam advised against it at all costs, knowing his brother can be a troublemaker and knowing Steve is incredibly gullible.
“So, you said Sharon was seeing a friend tonight, right?” John asks, setting up the situation for tonight.
“Yes, she said she was going downtown to see a friend who wouldn’t be making it to the wedding.” Steve confirms.
John begins his speal; how he heard Sharon telling an agent that she was instead going to meet with one of the other recruits tonight, as a final affair before her wedding. There’s a walkie-talkie hidden in the desk they’re crowded around, an identical one in the room where Leila and Kennedy sit, waiting for the code word to come about for them to put on their performance.
Sam is annoyed. The irritation is radiating off his body, he feels as though if he rolls his eyes any harder, the earth will start spinning backwards. He watches Steve tense up as John relays his story of overheard gossip, and he gets even more angry.
How is Steve going to believe a teenager about this stupid shit? He tries to take a step back, remembering that not everyone knows John as well as he does, knows how he likes to start trouble, knows that this is the kind of stuff he does when he’s bored. He also can’t imagine what it’s like to hear that your fiancée  may be cheating on you. So, he remains silent, letting this go on, knowing there’s no way it can be true.
“I’ve seen them here only twice before, always at nine,” John explains, casually emphasizing the number in order to signal his accomplices.
“Look! There they are, now!”
The three of them look to the window, and the shadows of two people appear. Sam and Steve don’t want to believe it, but the girl looks just like Sharon - same height, same build, same hair; they can even see the silhouette of long nails on her hands, nails Sharon got done earlier that day.
The two bodies clearly begin to embrace each other, heaty kissing and groping visible to the men in the lab. The taller man’s hands slip down to pick the other person up, them wrapping their legs around his body as they continue to kiss.
Steve doesn’t say anything, just walks off back towards the elevators where they came from, and Sam follows quickly behind, refusing to leave his best friend alone.
John struggles to hold in his amused laughs until he hears the elevator doors close. When they do, he quickly reaches for the walkie-talkie inside his desk, telling his associates that they did a job well done.
“I figured it’d be easy to fool those two meatheads, but I didn’t think it’d be that easy.” John admits.
Meanwhile, Sam is trying to stop Steve from having a full blown panic attack in the elevator ride back upstairs.
Steve quickly dials and redials Sharon’s phone, repeating the process every time she doesn’t answer.
“Man, relax -”
“Relax?! You want me to relax?!”
“Okay, bad choice of words -”
“You know what, I’m just going to wait until she gets home. She told me she wouldn’t be home late because tonight's our last night staying together before our wedding night, and when I see her, I’ll confront her.”
“Steve, I think you should -”
Steve ignores him and stomps out of the elevator as soon as the doors open, leaving Sam alone in the elevator to linger in his out frustration.
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kaizokuou-ni-naru · 3 years
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The Voyage So Far: Paramount War (Part One)
east blue (1 | 2) || alabasta (1 | 2) || skypiea || water 7 || enies lobby || thriller bark || paramount war (1 | 2) || fishman island || punk hazard || dressrosa (1 | 2) || whole cake island || wano (1 | 2)
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the introduction of the celestial dragons really is just so brutally effective. this is the first time we see them, and before they even show up on page they immediately establish themselves as both absolutely powerful and absolutely despicable. everyone is watching them commit atrocities in broad daylight, and nobody dares say a word. 
i mentioned it back in the enies lobby post, i think, with spandam, but oda is very, very good at creating villains who it just feels so good and so deeply satisfying to see them get annihilated, and the celestial dragons are maybe the crowning example of it. 
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i really like how none of the strawhats are really intimidated or impressed at all by the celestial dragons, in sharp contrast to how everyone else responds to them. some of that is ignorance, but you can’t tell me zoro would have acted any differently in this scene had he known charloss was a member of the world’s ruling class. all the power the celestial dragons have comes from fear; of course their greatest weakness is someone who just doesn’t care. 
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obviously this moment is just excellent, no qualifiers needed, but one thing i really love about it is how all the bad shit that results from this does not detract from the sheer satisfaction of what happens at the auction house at all. like, even though this leads directly to the strawhats getting crushed by the pacifista and kizaru and scattered by kuma, i’ve never once caught myself thinking luffy shouldn’t have done this. 
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i’m a huge fan of how rayleigh introduces himself. he knocks out the whole action house with conqueror’s haki, but luffy is completely unaffected, and the two of them just watch each other down the aisle for a moment as everyone else collapses around them. 
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i don’t know that i’ll ever get over the fact that oda created and designed the supernovas as he was writing sabaody. they’re all such distinct and memorable characters, and almost all of them have fit neatly into the post-timeskip story one way or another. they really feel like a part of the world that was always meant to be there. 
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i think the way roger as a character is handled is very, very cool, because we don’t really meet him as a person- when we first learn of him, on the very first page, he’s a myth, a story, a framing device. which is fitting, because that’s all the characters know him as. the rest of the world doesn’t know what roger was like as a person or why he did what he did, and so neither do our main characters and neither do we. 
and then we learn, slowly, by following in roger’s steps and meeting the characters who did know him, like rayleigh and whitebeard and garp. and through their testimony and memories, over the course of the story, roger goes from being a faceless myth to being a proper character.
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i think this panel, where luffy says he just wants to be the freest person on the seas, might be my favorite luffy panel. if nothing else, it’s definitely one of the ones i think about the most in terms of his characterization. luffy’s been defining himself by his dream since the very start of the story- he’s the man who’s going to be king of the pirates! but it’s only here that we learn what that goal actually means to him, and what he actually really wants. he just wants to be free. 
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the tone shift of sabaody really is impeccable. because up until a certain point, everything seems pretty par for the course. the strawhats make some new friends, get into trouble for their sakes, get into a hard fight where they all have to work together but eventually scrape out a win. 
but then kizaru shows up, and another pacifista, and kuma himself, and for the first time in the story luffy says this is a fight they can’t win- 
and then zoro disappears, and all of the audience’s expectations for how this is going to play out get thrown completely out the window. 
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it’s not that we haven’t seen luffy upset before this- his fight with usopp in water 7 and merry’s funeral are the two obvious examples that come to mind- but we’ve never, to this point, seen him as crushed as he is at the end of sabaody. it really drives the abrupt tone shift of sabaody home, because we’re used to seeing luffy be generally cheerful, and if not that, at stubbornly determined to power through. but here, he’s just wrecked- and the paramount war saga is just getting started. 
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every time i see hancock i’m reminded what a lesbian i am.
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i’m talking a lot about character introductions this post, but a lot of really good characters get introduced in the first half of this saga, from the supernovas to rayleigh to jinbe. on that note, i really like hancock’s introduction, for reasons similar to what i said about roger earlier. she’s introduced as a cartoonishly evil one-dimensional bitch, and she leans hard into that characterization for the first half or so of amazon lily.
and then luffy narrowly keeps her and her sisters’ worst fear from being realized, and her facade starts to slip, and we get to know her as- still kind of a bitch, but also a deeply traumatized person who has very valid reasons for being the way she is, and someone who is overall a lot more complicated than she appears at first glance. 
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one of my favorite things about luffy is his ability to always, always defy expectations. hancock is dead certain he’ll take her offer of a ship and abandon marguerite and the others, but he doesn’t even hesitate before doing the exact opposite. luffy is always turning people’s worlds upside down.
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i have a friend who coined the term “conflict of interest arc” to refer to the arcs where a crewmate is forced to choose between the crew and some obligation or baggage from their past- arlong park for nami, whole cake island for sanji, etc. 
marineford is luffy’s conflict of interest arc- he has to make the choice, here, to prioritize saving ace over reuniting with his crew. where it differs from all other such arcs, then, is that nobody else can come to back him up. he’s well and truly on his own. 
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i love how thoroughly expectations get turned on their head with jinbe. for the longest time, all we know about him is that he’s a shichibukai and arlong’s former captain, so given what arlong was like and what the shichibukai encountered thus far have been like, it’s a fair guess to assume he’s pretty awful.
and then we meet him, and he’s ace’s friend, sitting bloody and beaten in the deepest dungeons of impel down for refusing to fight in an unjust war.
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bon-chan is really one of the greatest examples of one piece’s stubborn refusal to treat any character as disposable, and oda’s endless ability to find new and interesting ways to fit them into the story. in pretty much any other manga, it would be all but guaranteed that we wouldn’t see a character like bon-chan again after the conclusion of the alabasta saga. here, luffy straight up would not have made it to marineford without him. this is true for mr. 3 too- who would’ve thought his ability to duplicate keys out of wax, established and promptly forgotten some three hundred chapters ago, would be the thing that let luffy free ace on the scaffold?
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magellan is a good antagonist. i’m not saying i like him- i don’t particularly- but he’s a great antagonist for a couple reasons, and one of them is that his powers are terrifying. magellan is essentially what might be called in video game terminology an advancing wall of doom- the only viable strategy for dealing with him is to run.
i had more i wanted to say here but it literally kept turning into a rant about one piece’s take on morality no matter how many times i tried to keep it short, so i’ll settle for just saying that magellan is an antagonist but not a villain and i think that’s interesting. 
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the absolutely ridiculous, eclectic mix of people that luffy winds up gathering to escape impel down is possibly my favorite part of the whole arc. i just think it’s so fun and so characteristic of him that even when separated from his crew, he winds up attracting the weirdest, most powerful bunch of people around to break out of prison with. 
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the relationship between luffy and blackbeard is a really interesting one. it’s been plenty clear for some time that blackbeard is almost certainly going to be luffy’s final opponent to become pirate king, and yet they’ve been mostly running on parallel paths through the world, only occasionally coinciding (such as here and in jaya) and generally seeming pretty unconcerned with each other. it’s a really cool way to handle the built to an eventual showdown, and i really like it. 
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this is one of my favorite spreads just for sheer smile factor. i love it so much. i think we should get to see jinbe’s whale shark buddies more often, it’s a crime we haven’t seen them since this. 
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9worldstales · 3 years
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MCU What if Ep 1-2-3: My two cents
So, I’ve been watching the “What if” series. I won’t beat it around the bush, I’m enjoying it but at the same time I get the feeling this series is aimed at younger audience, younger audience which isn’t deeply familiar with the movies and needs to be feed a simpler storyline.
In fact from the way they present it in each episode 1 single change should be the one which gives life to a parallel universe in a sort of domino effect… only, from what I could see in those 3 episodes, there are actually multiple unconnected changes, 1 presented more markedly as if it were the one starting everything and the others… just there for unknown reasons but they aren’t remarked and might easily be missed by who doesn’t remember well the movies.
Characterizations are also simplified, with heroes more black and white than grey, and a general toning down of the drama. This isn’t necessarily tied to the short time, 30 minutes in the hand of a good storyteller are plenty of time to construct a complicate, adult, emotionally engaging story… but a complicate story requires an audience willing to put its mind to understand it, or capable to handle a more morally nuanced plot or that wouldn’t be too distressed by a more emotionally engaging one.
This kind of audience is clearly not what those stories are aiming at.
This isn’t meant to say they’re bad, they’re perfect for young audience, passing on a good message, being overall funny and giving them the chance to enjoy the heroes they love in a different setting.
Dialogues are nice, their voice actors so far delivered good performance, the art isn’t bad and the stories can feel still intriguing enough.
However, if you think too hard at them, especially in comparison to the original movie, the story tends to crumble or feel morally poor or mess up the characterization or some other thing.
Overall I think the “What if” so far are more enjoyable if you don’t really remember well the movies and, anyway, judge them as stand-alone more than “What if” based on how a single divergence from the plot could create a new timeline.
Some examples?
Pick “What If... Captain Carter Were the First Avenger?”
The divergence supposedly happens when Peggy decides to stay in the room.
Erskine: Agent Carter, wouldn't you be more comfortable in the booth? Peggy: No, I'd prefer to stay. Watcher: There. That's the moment that created a new universe. When asked to leave the room, Margaret "Peggy" Carter chose to stay. But soon it would be her venturing into the unknown and creating a new world.
Only, in truth, it’s not just Peggy who was meant to go to the booth and didn’t.
EVERYONE was meant to go to the booth… only they all stay and Kruger, the spy from Hydra, who was seated in the booth BEHIND Peggy in “Captain America”, in the “What if” episode attacks the lab during Erskine’s explanation and not, as he did in “Captain America”, after the experiment took place, using as a distraction a bomb he left in the booth, and not on the floor of near to where the experiment was taking place so that it can kill Erskine.
And, to be really accurate, Erskine, in “Captain America”, asked Peggy to move to the booth when Steve was already lying down for the experiment, while here we see him asking her so while the two are standing next to each other and he hadn’t started undressing yet.
And there’s a reason why in the movie things were done like that.
Of course in the movie everyone was in the booth, it was safer should something go wrong with the experiment.
Of course Kruger waited for the experiment to be carried on, if it didn’t work there was no point in stealing a vial of a serum that didn’t work.
Of course Kruger left the bomb in the booth and made it explode when he was outside of it, so that he was sure it would create distraction but not harm him.
Overall, it’s not just Peggy that acts differently, it’s Erskine, who asked her to move in advance, it’s all the people there, who didn’t move to the booth, it’s ESPECIALLY, Kruger, who originally aimed to see if the serum worked and, in this case, steal it and kill Erskine so he couldn’t produce more and instead he now doesn’t check if the serum works and kills, for unknown reasons Chester Phillips, who didn’t even have a weapon in his hand and so didn’t pose a threat.
Even the placing of the bomb is poor because, since there was plenty of mechanisms in the lab, it could have triggered a series of explosions that were to destroy the whole place, himself and all the serum included.
But how many young viewers noticed all this or worry for the risk of everything exploding or realize that causing an explosion outside of the room in which the serum was worked as a diversion so as to take people away from that place, while if the bomb were to explode there, everyone would converge in that place, with hydrants possibly as no one worries about fire spreading but they should… even if there’s magically not as much as there should be.
And tragic scenes get tamed down, we don’t see Erskine die, we might not even realize he died in the explosion, young viewers might not remember or not like Chester Phillips so when he’s shoot he doesn’t leave an impression and Kruger’s shape gets shoot down by Peggy so we don’t have him committing suicide.
It’s not a complain, it’s a logic choice to make the series more palatable to a younger target by toning down the violence and the drama in it.
And so we reach the big event of the episode.
John Flynn would want Stark to get the serum injected in himself (forgetting there were men of the MP around him who shouldn’t be all dead) but starts to complain when Peggy volunteers to take the serum herself. Peggy does anyway and again things are tamed down, as Steve ended up screaming so loud in “Captain America” Peggy feared they were killing him and they considered stopping the experiment but Peggy doesn’t scream at all.
Sure, in had been scientifically proved women are built to handle pain better, but very likely Peggy’s lack of scream isn’t because she’s tougher, it’s again to not upset young audience.
So, while Steve lies on the ground and no one comes to help him, Peggy comes out of the experiment enhanced. But here we’ve the real core of the episode, John Flynn decides the experiment is an absolute failure. Why?
Flynn: Sixty million dollars and all the hope in the world down the drain. I was promised an army. I was promised peace and salvation. Instead, I get a girl.
Basically the real core of the episode, the real theme is that Captain Carter will have to fight discrimination based on sexism.
Peggy: You have a Super Soldier. Flynn: Women aren't soldiers, and they sure as hell don't fight on the front lines. They might break a nail.
Undoubtedly this is an important matter, it’s a good topic to make an episode about, to give young girls an heroine, to show to them and to the boys what an absolute moron Flynn was in discriminating Peggy, also presenting boys being supportive of Peggy and trusting her. Howard Stark, Steve Rogers, and then Bucky and everyone else, all the men who see Peggy fighting are ultimately supportive and admiring of her. This is important. But Flynn’s sexism is better remarked if we don’t remember what happened in “Captain America”.
Steve Rogers: Sir, if you’re going after Schmidt, I want in. Col. Chester Phillips: You’re an experiment. You’re going to Alamogordo. Steve Rogers: The serum worked. Col. Chester Phillips: I asked for an army and all I got was you. You are not enough. Senator Brandt: [to Steve] With all due respect to the Colonel, I think we may be missing the point. I’ve seen you in action, Steve. More importantly, the country’s seen it. [to his aide] Paper.[the aide shows them the news paper (‘The New York Examiner’ Vol. XCVII No. 33.634, Wednesday, June 23, 1943), headlines: "Nazis in New York - mystery man saves child"] The enlistment lines have been around the block since your picture hit the newsstands. You don’t take a soldier, a symbol like that, and hide him in a lab. Son, do you want to serve your country on the most important battlefield of the war? Steve Rogers: Sir, that’s all I want. Senator Brandt: Then, congratulations. You just got promoted.
I mean, Rogers was a male and he too was judged ‘not enough’. Brandt has him tour the nation in a colorful costume as “Captain America” to promote war bonds, while scientists study him and attempt to reverse-engineer the formula.
Chester Phillips was likely killed because otherwise they would have no reason to deal with Peggy the same way he dealt with Steve ‘one is not enough’, only it wouldn’t have been a sexist problem, just math (though it could be argued Phillips never trusted Steve to begin with). This causes the message ‘sexism is dumb’ ends up feeling forced because it’s basically pasted over a previous narrative of ‘not being enough’. If you want, you can read it as always discrimination and discrimination it’s always bad, but it still cheapens the message.
All this not to say that the episode isn’t awesome if seen as a stand-alone… it’s just that when you compare it with “Captain America” it feels weaker.
And then there are the other discrepancies, like the Hydra bringing the Tesseract to Berlin and not to Azzano (a sign somehow Schmidt and Hitler didn’t have a fall out) with Stark using it to power up an “Hydra Stomper” suit that proves if he had had the right power sources and technologies he could have built “Iron Man” too.
They’re not bad points (actually I loved the “Hydra Stomper” suit and how Peggy rode it the way Tekkaman from “Uchu no Kishi Tekkaman” used to ride Pegas in my childhood memories) but again they’re divergences without a clear reason. Schmidt and Hitler shouldn’t get along better solely because Peggy got the serum.
And that’s the first episode.
“What If... T'Challa Became a Star-Lord?” is also clearly aimed to a younger audience but with a goal different from “What If... Captain Carter Were the First Avenger?”
Watcher: What you call destiny is just an equation, a product of variables. Right place, right time, or in some instances, the wrong place at the wrong time. As fate would have it, at that very moment, a Ravager spacecraft was arriving on Earth to abduct the spawn of the Celestial, Ego. But in this universe, Yondu outsourced the assignment to his subordinates. Yondu: You morons grabbed the wrong kid!
For start this episode doesn’t try to rewrite a single movie, but by taking pieces of assorted movies “Thor: The Dark World” (for Tivan) “Guardians of the Galaxy” (for the idea of the setting), “Black Panther” (for T’Challa), “Avengers: Infinity War” (for the Black Order), “Captain America” (Tivan has his shielf), “Thor: Ragnarok” (TIvan has and uses Hela’s headpiece, talking of her as if he knew her and we can see he also has Thor’s hammer), “Thor: The Dark World” (Tivan has Malekith’s dagger) creates a completely different timeline by changing something that happened in 1988 and then jumping straight in… 2014, I presume, where a lot is different but we aren’t meant to see the process due to which things were changed, just to accept how T’Challa, kidnapped as a kid by the Ravagers, managed to make the difference.
In fact the whole theme of this episode is that T’Challa is a hero and a role model that gets success and admiration by TALKING TO PEOPLE AND PERSUADING THEM TO DO THE RIGHT THING. He’s meant not to have a character arc but to create a world that’s the best possible for people.
In fact we’re told just by talking with Thanos he persuaded him to stop his whole plan without using violence.
Korath: How exactly did you stop Thanos, the Mad Titan, from decimating half of the universe? Oh, no. Thanos: I'm a big enough man to admit when I'm wrong. T'Challa here showed me there was more than one way to reallocate the universe's resources. T’Challa: Sometimes the best weapon in your arsenal is just a good argument.
I mean, he doesn’t just turn the Ravagers into Robin Hood’s “merry men”, he talks with Thanos and Thanos decides to change his ways.
This is great, a wonderful message, a message against violence, a message about the power of the words and it makes T’Challa a real hero who, just by talking, saves the universe from Thanos but… but T’Challa from the movies was maybe not so good at persuading people from not doing wrong but he still had something amazing that made him very human and, at the same time a role model.
T’Challa wasn’t perfect, he made mistakes… but then he would admit them and correct them.
In “Captain America: Civil War” he wants to kill Bucky in retaliation for what happened to his father…
Natasha Romanoff: T'Challa. Task force will decide who brings in Barnes. T'Challa: [He clenches his fist.] Don't bother, Miss Romanoff. I'll kill him myself.
…but then he understands killing his father’s murder would be wrong and even stops Zemo from committing suicide.
T'Challa: Vengeance has consumed you. It's consuming them. [He blinks ruefully and retracts the claws in his gloves.] I am done letting it consume me. Justice will come soon enough. Helmut Zemo: [Holding a gun Zemo smiles thinly.] Tell that to the dead. [He tries to shoot himself but T'Challa grabs him just as he fires.] T'Challa: The living are not done with you yet.
And the same goes in “Black Panther”. At first he doesn’t want to ask Killmonger his name because he knows he is his uncle’s son and this would give him the right to compete for the throne as well as expose what his father did…
Killmonger: Oh, I ain't requesting nothing! Ask who I am? Shuri: You are Eric Steves. An American black operative. A mercenary nicknamed Killmonger. That's who you are. Killmonger: (LAUGHING) That's not my name, Princess. Ask me, King? T'Challa: No. Killmonger: Ask me. T'Challa: Take him away.
…but then he’ll acknowledges they had wronged him, will show him Wakanda’s beauty and will change things in Wakanda. T’Challa in the movies isn’t as perfect as T’Challa in the “What if” episode. He can’t solve everything and make the world perfect. He isn’t always right. He gets angry, vengeful, afraid of the truth. But then he rises above this and does the right thing.
“What if” T’Challa is a model of perfection that’s admirable… but that sits simply too high above the original T’Challa who also had to deal with Thanos but didn’t even think he could change his mind just by giving him a talk… and with good reason.
Younger kids might not realize because they might have not fully grasped how Thanos was a genocidal maniac, who massacred millions even prior to the snap, tortured his daughters and even removed body parts from Nebula. They might swallow it was just that easy to talk him into not doing the snap, and Thanos only needed someone to tell him it was wrong… and that in truth he loved Nebula… but for older viewers while beautiful, this is simply unbelievable.
And what about Yondu and the Ravagers? Just because they had T’Challa they became good and righteous. This is how Peter Quill described Yondu in “Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2” which still gives a sympathetic portrayal of Yondu:
Quill: He wasn't my father. Yondu was the guy who abducted me. He'd beat the crap out of me so I'd learn how to fight and he kept me in terror threatening to eat me.
But T’Challa doesn’t seem to have such complains against Yondu.
Now… In Quill’s case Yondu kept Quill so as to protect him from Ego…
Yondu: Once I figured out what happened to the other kids, I wasn't gonna just hand you over.
…yet he kidnap him and tells him his home was destroyed so as to manipulate him into staying… but this is so easily forgotten by T’Challa to the point children might not even realize it was there. Yondu was a good dad for him, he kidnapped him because T’Challa was basically wasted at home.
Yondu: Sometimes you need to hear a lie to see the truth. You're just like me, T'Challa. T’Challa: I am nothing like you. Yondu: You're an explorer, Star-Lord. And for people like you, like us, the past ain't nothing but a prison. You don't belong down there with them. You belong up here with us, with your family.
Although T’Challa doesn’t seem to agree at first… in the end all is forgotten.
Yondu: Look, T'Challa, I just wanted to say... T’Challa: There's no need. I was the one who told you I wanted to see the world. All you did was show me the universe.
and
T’Chaka: (Voice shaking) My son, my son. I knew you would find your way home to us. T’Challa: I'm sorry it took me so long. Let me introduce you to the family I made along the way.
All this is to basically excuse the premise, something horrible like kidnapping a child is passed as not really something terrible so that kids wouldn’t deal with its emotional implications and can even think that it was a pity that, in the normal universe, it was Peter Quill that was kidnapped… without realizing that kidnapping is bad and that in T’Challa’s case Yondu wasn’t even doing it because he wanted to protect him. Actually it’s unexplained why, all of sudden, Yondu felt the need to keep T’Challa and completely forgot about Quill, didn’t even care about making sure Ego wouldn’t find Quill despite, thanks to T’Challa, becoming a better person. It’s another change, one that people knowing the movies is bound to notice but not kids.
So again, for who knows the movie well, the story ends up being weak and this is also because, while T’Challa could persuade Thanos off screen not to commit genocide… all of sudden his persuasive power isn’t even really tested out with Tivan. Tivan is the big evil… yet he’s somehow less fearsome than Thanos because we clearly don’t want to scare the kids.
So again, wonderful for young audience who doesn’t remember well the movies… not so solid for who’s older.
And so we move to “What If... the World Lost Its Mightiest Heroes?” which is absolutely my favourite so far. This one at a first glance seems to be a “What if” of a comic named “The Avengers Prelude: Fury's Big Week”.
The awesome thing of this story is we don’t know what changed the universe, we only discover that someone is killing off the Avengers before they could become the Avengers, starting with Tony Stark.
The mystery is, at a first glance, cool, the idea original, Natasha gets a big role as she investigates and even fights things along with Fury and, again, children will likely not really realize how the “What if” is actually changing the settings even when they’re supposedly not related to the change that caused this parallel reality, the death of Hope van Dyne. I mean, we can start our list of changes with the random funny things that has no reason to happen because Hope’s death shouldn’t have made Coulson and Barton to be so appreciative of Thor’s hair, something they never bring up in the movie…
Coulson: Whoa. I got visual on the intruder. He's a Caucasian male, mid-twenties with... really great hair. Fury: Excuse me? Coulson: It's an accurate description. Sir, he's gorgeous. Fury: I need eyes in the sky. Barton. Barton: Already on it. He's making a move on the hammer. One shot, one kill, sir. Just say the word. Fury: Hold your fire. I wanna see this. Barton: Whoa. Coulson wasn't lying about the hair. That's nice.
…to continue with more plot related matters like how Betty should have known Banner had intruded in her lab dressed up as a delivery boy and was now hiding in a wardrobe… but if we want we can forgive them. Maybe Hope’s death really changed some things in weird ways we couldn’t predict… but the place with the biggest revolution seems to be Asgard… which actually shouldn’t have been affected by by Hope’s death AT ALL and instead the situation is completely different from how it were in “Thor” to the point I could write a 20 pages meta on the changes. But, if we assume this episode is aimed at children, it works because the “Thor” situation was complicate and here instead they show solely some random and confuse elements that children might have picked up from talks about the movies… but that weren’t like that in “Thor”.
And again we have messages that can be good for children, how a father will love his little girl, how Nick Fury will save the day even without the Avengers, how:
Fury: S.H.I.E.L.D. is people, people willing to give their lives for something greater than themselves to save the world from men like you.
…and how in the darkest time new heroes will always come to save Earth as when Loki take over because it seems there are no more Avengers, Fury can still count on Carol Danvers and Steve Rogers.
Coulson: The Avengers fell before they had a chance to rise. May they rest in peace. Fury: They can, but we won't. The Avengers were always meant to be more than a team. They were an idea, the affirmation of humanity's need to believe that in our darkest hour, we will find our heroes. Watcher: I believe that in this universe, as in every other, hope never dies. As long as someone keeps their good eye on the bigger picture.
It’s a good message about hope… but again, it’s something for children. We’re meant to believe Earth could be conquered in one day time without struggle whatsoever… and that only the heroes could save it. Children might not remember it but in “The Avengers” humans tried to nuke New York to stop Loki… the idea they would just sit and say ‘whatever’ to Loki’s domination makes it look as if they actually agree with him to an adult… but, of course, the battle of New York is something we might not want to show to a little child.
And now… something else that’s relevant.
I said the “What ifs” are good stories for children… but we’re talking of young children here because if the child is a little older they can end up passing a completely wrong message.
Remember "What If... Captain Carter Were the First Avenger?" and how it tackled sexism as an absurd behavior to keep? How Captain Carter overcomes it? By using her supersoldier powers to beat the Nazi. She shows as a supersoldier she works.
Does she turns over the concept that ‘Women aren't soldiers, and they sure as hell don't fight on the front lines. They might break a nail’?
At most she proves she can be a soldier. She doesn’t fight using the fact she’s a woman as her strongest point, she fights using her super strength as her strongest point… where Steve Roger’s strongest point wasn’t his enhanced strength but his moral values. Peggy proves as a super soldier she’s equal to Steve… but Steve as a super soldier proved he was better than Red Skull. Peggy’s actions in the story doesn’t cause people to revalue women in general, just her. People either aren’t sexist and accept her regardless of her genre (Howard, Steve) or they’re sexist but accept her because she is strong.
It’s meaningful that when she thinks Steve is dead Flynn goes back to his old mindset…
Flynn: She should never have been in the field in the first place.
… because the truth is he never changed it. Peggy had only yelled at them to stop calling Steve “Hydra Stomper” as his name was “Steve Roger” and Flynn decides she, not Steve who actually died, should have never been in the field.
They don’t show how Peggy got information from Zola, which seems to imply all she did to get them was to beat him up. Chester Phillips in “Captain America” manipulated him into talking with his intelligence only.
Do you know which were Peggy’s abilities in the universe in which she isn’t a super soldier? She’s a Master Martial Artist, an Expert Marksman, a Master Spy, an Expert Tactician, a Thief and can speak and read English, Russian and German fluently as well as use a convincing American accent.
This is hardly noticeable though in her own story.
Howard: Should we not have a plan? Peggy: Who needs a plan? I have a shield. Howard: A shield is not a plan. Oh, Carter...
She was a tactician!
Now… she has a shield. But whatever girl wants to be like her won’t have a shield, nor a super serum. To be a real role model for girls who aren’t anymore children Peggy needed to have qualities they too could have that would empower her. The only good moment is when she understands what Howard plans to do:
Howard: If I can get to the controls, I can transpose the ingress and do science stuff. Peggy: You mean transpose the polarity and reverse the suction? Howard: Being the genius is my thing.
But again, the irony here is that this is no genius plan, middle school students had probably seen him being done in movies and cartoons already. It might seem genius idea to kids, but when you’re older it hardly sounds like one… and when Howard complains all in the machine is written in German they don’t have Peggy show her knowledge of it, and translate the words as she fight, she just fight and he’s supposed to figure things out.
“Captain America” is a role model for what he has inside. I’m sure Peggy Carter has plenty of things inside her as well… but “What if” makes it more about the super strength she has gained.
Where Steve gains Phillips’ respect, Flynn’s respect is more a façade due to her successes thanks to her super strength, and that respect gets pulled back as soon as she gets upset by his behavior. Sure, Flynn is a worse person than Phillips in this black and white world but this too is part of the narrative. If Peggy can’t permanently win over sexism in one person, it’s not real victory at all. If what’s remarkable about her is how she fights (due to the serum) then who didn’t have it, will never have a hope. Peggy Carter was more of a female model when she wasn’t supersoldier, she felt more of a role model in “Captain America”, when she got to do this with her own strength:
Peggy Carter: Put your right foot forward. Gilmore Hodge: Mmm… We gonna wrassle? Cause I got a few moves I know you’ll like. [suddenly Peggy punches him hard in the face. Col.Phillips drives up] Col. Chester Phillips: Agent Carter. Peggy Carter: Colonel Phillips. Col. Chester Phillips: I see you’re breaking in the candidates. That’s good!
…than when she punched Nazis thanks to being a super soldier. Peggy has never been a fragile Fräulein, but this episode seems to remark she’s not one merely because she has taken the serum.
As a result… she sets an impossible role model for girls. If the key to be (partially) respected and accepted by males is to get the super soldier serum and/or the shiled… well, that serum doesn’t exist, not does the shield.
And a similar problem exists in “What If... T'Challa Became a Star-Lord?”
Teaching a small child he can solve problems by talking and not by hitting is important… but passing the message that you can stop bullies or worse just by talking to them is again setting an impossible role model. People like Thanos can’t be stopped with just words. People like Yondu and the Ravagers wouldn’t become Robin Hood and his merry men merely because they have with themselves a young boy who tells them the right things… and what Yondu does to T’Challa is worse than what he did to Quill and having been kidnapped as a child shouldn’t be waved off so easily. We’re not talking of Yondu finding an orphaned T’Challa and raising him, if he had picked up N’Jadaka after he lost his father it would have been different, but here, he just ripped a child from a loving family, a family he loved back. And it’s almost presented as a good thing because this causes the universe to be saved by Thanos, Yondu’s lie giving T’Challa the motivation to try to to make the universe a better place.
Nebula: You lost your home, and now you save everyone else's.
And problems continue with “What If... the World Lost Its Mightiest Heroes?” because there, the solution, the hope, is presented solely by the superheroes. No one opposes to Loki, the whole Earth is expected to be saved by Captain America and Carol Danvers. The one who refuses to kneel to Loki is Fury, who’s considered special. We don’t have in this story a lone old man who’s standing stubbornly despite the threat.
LOKI: Kneel before me. [The crowd ignores him. Three more Loki's appear, surrounding and blocking the crowd from escaping.] I said KNEEL! [While the crowd quietly kneels, Loki embraces out his arms with a wide smile] Is not this simpler? Is this not your natural state? It's the unspoken truth of humanity, that you crave subjugation. The bright lure of freedom diminishes your life's joy in a mad scramble for power, for identity. You were made to be ruled. In the end, you will always kneel. ELDER GERMAN MAN: [As the words resonate to the kneeling crowd, an elder German man refuses to kneel and stands, heroic.] Not to men like you. LOKI: There are no men like me. ELDER GERMAN MAN: There are always men like you. LOKI: Look to your elder, people. Let him be an example. [As Loki is about to execute the man with his scepter as the light glows blue. Right as the energy beam shoots out, Captain America arrives, diving in just in time to block the blast with his shield, and knocking down Loki]
So basically in this series heroes set impossible standards… and are the only ones who can save the day. It can be fun for an adult, as he doesn’t need role models… but for a boy who’s no more a small child but not yet old enough to do without viewing heroes are role models, the heroes presents a standard that is something unattainable. And this is bad because he too might enjoy watching the show, but the show gives him no hope… where ironically, Marvel movies were about giving positive role models in which you could identify.
Overall I stay my case, the “What if” series is definitely enjoyable… but the bar for the target audience is set to a very young age, they don’t really follow the idea that one small change can realistically change everything because they actually intrude plenty of small changes for their setting to work, and might end up not giving the right message if you’re in between a age between a small child and an adult. Of course future “What if” episodes might change, and I will probably still love them because I adore what if… but I would love them even more if they had aimed to a target audience a little older… making their heroes, more realistic role models which can be emulated and if they had respected their own premise, that ONE SINGLE CHANGE can create a completely different new reality.
What changed in the Peggy episode wasn’t just Peggy not sitting on the booth. What changed in the T’Challa episode wasn’t just Yondu sending his subordinates to pick up a kid. What changed in the mightiest heroes episode wasn’t just Hope dying.
The fact you need more changes in order to make the difference makes the initial point that one change can make the difference void. You destroy your own premise… and this is not really a great idea.
But whatever, I guess if the idea is that the audience is really young, they didn’t expect the audience to pick this up but just to swallow their idea that ‘a moment created a new universe’.
MEDIA MENTIONED:
Movies: “Iron Man 2” (2010), “The Incredible Hulk" (2008), “Thor” (2011), “Captain America: The First Avenger” (2011), “The Avengers” (2012), “Thor: The Dark World” (2013), “Captain America: The Civil War” (2016), “Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2” (2017), “Thor – Ragnark” (2017), “Black Panther” (2018), "Avengers: Infinity War” (2018), “Captain Marvel” (2019)
Comics: “The Avengers Prelude Fury's Big Week” (2012)
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