#what reason would ashton have to learn to swim
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this is the real reason we haven't had an episode about these three yet. It took two episodes just for force ashton into the pool, not to mention the floaties...
#what reason would ashton have to learn to swim#none thats why he has the floaties.#critical role ashton#ashton greymoore#critical role laudna#laudna#critical role orym#orym of the air ashari#critical role ashton greymoore#pool party#critical role art#critical role fanart#critical role#ashrym#laudmoore
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Remind Me
omg me?? writing a lashton body worship fic about Luke’s thighs after that new video dropped?? idk sounds super out of character.
This is literally just a 4.6k Body Pos. PWP that I wrote today while watching my chickens lmfao but please enjoy anyway.
Summary: Ashton catches Luke frowning to himself at Calum’s pool one afternoon, and decides to remind him how pretty he is.
Words: 4,602
Rating: Explicit
Pairing: Luke Hemmings/Ashton Irwin
Read Below
—Remind Me—
It’s as Luke is getting out of Calum’s pool that Ashton notices it.
They’re all together, as they often are—for marketing reasons only, of course, seeing as they secretly despise one another—at Calum’s place, Cal and Mike inside doing whatever it is those dumb shits like doing, leaving Luke and Ashton alone in the backyard.
Ashton is lounging out by the side of the pool, a book in hand—because he just hasn’t been in the mood to swim and would rather read—while Luke has been taking careful laps.
He’ll look up every so often to catch Luke leaning against the edge of the pool, his pale arms folded over the top of it, huffing like he’s out of breath, a frustrated pout drawn on his features, but Ashton figures it’s better to not ask why he looks so irritated.
If Luke wants to tell him, he will.
It’s only when he fully pushes himself out of the water and gets out of the pool that the problem arises.
Ashton can see him start to climb out, bracing his arms on the asphalt, and of course, he looks over the top of his book to get a better view; to watch how Luke’s back muscles shift beneath his skin, how the sinewy veins of his biceps strain to hoist himself up.
Luke has never been the strongest of them but he isn’t poorly built. Granted, with quarantine, he has added on a couple of pounds but nothing too significant. It’s healthy weight if anything, brought on by him eating better food he’s learned to make himself, working out a little more to get his arms larger.
He looks good, there’s no disputing that.
When he gets out of the water, Ashton’s eyes successfully trail the line of his back, the way his swim trunks have sagged to make his hips more visible, the slight heave of them over the waistband of the swimsuit, how it clings to his thighs enough to look like the fabric is straining to stay closed.
Yeah. He looks good.
It’s as Ashton's gaze is hovering on said waist and thighs that he notices Luke give an awkward pinch to his side, the squish of a love handle beneath his fingers, glancing down at himself with a deep grimace, before he walks to retrieve his towel, looping it up around his waist higher than it needs to be.
Now Ashton is the one who's frowning.
Because he knows Luke well enough to know what that means.
Luke hasn’t always been the proudest in his body; even when he was a fucking pipe cleaner back when the band first started, he was still nervous about what people thought of him in terms of his weight.
It’s always upset Ashton that it seems no one could ever dislike what Luke looks like as much as himself.
And so to see him, with that telltale distaste on his handsome features, scrunching his nose up as he adjusts the towel to cover as much as he can... it's enough to make Ashton's mood dip.
He turns to walk back and almost instantly notices the way Ashton is looking at him, stopping in his tracks. He asks, skeptical, “What?”
Ashton tries to uncrease his brow the best he can, and he shakes his head, knowing better than to say something about it now. Instead, he merely flattens his smile and says, “Nothing. M’thinking.”
“Penny for your thoughts?” Luke asks and Ashton chuckles.
“Yeah, unless you’re hiding a penny up your ass right now, I don’t think you have one to offer.”
“It’s a metaphorical penny,” Luke replies, walking to sit beside Ashton’s legs on the pool chair.
He shifts the towel up further when he sits and Ashton doesn’t miss how he tries to keep his posture straight so his stomach won’t fold.
Ashton’s frown deepens.
“Is something wrong?” Luke asks him.
“Not with me,” he answers.
That seems to confuse Luke more than anything else and his eyes widen as he says, “oh.” He softens in a moment and it’s nervous as he opens his mouth before he closes it, giving Ashton an anxious glance. “It’s not… me, is it?”
Ashton cocks his head, smiling to reassure him, closing his book. “Of course it’s not you.”
Even though it is. But he’s not about to say to Luke, ‘yeah, something is wrong. The way you’re looking at yourself is wrong. Why did you pinch your side and grimace like that?’ Because he knows Luke will make an excuse. Luke will brush it under the rug and won’t want to talk about it and will avoid Ashton and his eyes to the best of his ability.
Ashton respects Luke's choices and he’ll always respect them. But he certainly doesn’t want Luke thinking like that. Doesn't want him thinking he's anything less than beautiful.
He informs, “I’m just thinking like I always do, you know how I am. You ready to head out?”
Luke raises his brows. “Now? We just got here.”
“Uh-huh. I'm ready to go.” Ashton smiles, reaching out to tug at the corner of Luke’s towel. “Wanna take you back to mine.”
Instantly, Luke’s expression shifts and he adjusts the way he’s sitting, sending his blue eyes hurriedly to the open door of Calum’s house to make sure no one will hear them.
He glances back at Ashton and his lips hint up at their corners almost cautiously. “You do?”
“Mhm.” Ashton hums, scooting closer to him so he can press a kiss to the underside of his jaw, and he doesn’t miss the way Luke stiffens to the touch, tilting his chin up to give Ashton more access to him. He says against Luke’s jawline, “Wanna get my hands on you.”
Luke takes in a sharp breath. “Yeah?”
Ashton briefly opens his mouth against Luke’s neck, drawing his tongue over his pulse point, and says, “Yeah.”
He continues to kiss along Luke’s neck and when he sucks at the bend of his shoulder, Luke lets out a soft whimper that has Ashton's dick twitching in his own shorts.
“Wanna hold those nice hips of yours against the bed when I fuck you,” he says to Luke’s shoulder, “I’ll make you feel so good, Lu, I promise.”
Luke inhales roughly, fingers clenching at the fabric of his towel and he squeaks, “Okay. Yeah. Nice. No complaints here.”
Ashton chuckles as he moves away, briefly cupping Luke’s cheek before he does, pulling him in for a soft kiss on the mouth. He loves how smooth Luke’s lips are, how they open up so easily for him every time, always asking for more in just the way they form something as simple as a smile.
He says, brushing his thumb over Luke’s cheekbone before he draws away, just so Luke knows, “I’m the luckiest guy in the world.”
Luke’s cheeks go pink and he coughs, darting his eyes away. “You’re the cheesiest guy in the world, I’ll give you that.”
“You say cheesy, I say incredibly charming, that’s fine.” Ashton shrugs. “Also, it’s your turn to give Cal and Mike an excuse as to why we’re leaving early.”
“Sounds good.” Luke stands up, adjusting his towel. “Nothing’s gonna beat that time you told them we were going chocolate taste testing though.”
“I’m a musician,” Ashton replies, “not an actor.”
Luke smiles at him, and he reaches out to brush his fingers under Ashton’s chin in a gesture of fondness. Ashton loves his fingers. Thin piano playing fingers that look so good when they grapple to get a hold on bedsheets or when they dig into Ashton’s shoulders, sink their nails into his back. Just one of the many things he loves about Luke's body.
He grins back and says, leaning his face into Luke's hand, “Maybe just say it’s past our bedtime.”
Luke giggles. “It’s five in the afternoon.”
“Practically midnight.”
Luke doesn’t do much but snort before he turns away, fingers slipping from Ashton’s jaw as he trails inside. He fixes the towel once as he goes, holding it tighter to himself, and it makes Ashton frown again.
While he really does want to fuck Luke for the obvious reason of, well, getting to fuck Luke, there’s an ulterior motive for this evening.
He wants to show Luke just how pretty he is.
They say their goodbyes to Calum and Michael before they leave, who look like they don’t believe for a second that Luke really has a zoom meeting to get to at 5:30 but don’t make any protest.
They know Luke and Ashton well enough to know if they want to leave, they're going to leave. So they allow it.
The entire drive home, Ashton keeps his hand on Luke’s thigh in the passenger seat, lightly rubbing his thumb against the inside seam of his jeans, and Luke’s blue gaze stays on his hand the entire time.
Ashton wonders if Luke is thinking the same thing he is. That even Ashton’s large hand isn’t big enough to cover his whole thigh.
It’s all Ashton’s thinking about if he’s honest. He's honestly having a hard time paying attention to the road with how much it's dominating his thoughts. How fucking wide Luke’s thigh is. How much he wants to grab it in his hand, squeeze it and feel the soft flesh sink beneath his fingertips. How much he wants to smack it just to watch it shake.
Fuck, he’s already hard.
He practically drags Luke through the door when they get home, and the second it closes, he shoves Luke back, loving the way a surprised yelp pulls from Luke’s chest as he’s pinned against the door by Ashton’s body weight.
“Been wanting this all day,” Ashton grunts, tucking his face into Luke’s neck to start mouthing at his skin. “Looked so goddamn good today, Lu. Wanted you so bad.”
Luke gasps, exposing his neck more, eyes slipping shut as Ashton works at sucking hickeys into his throat. He chokes softly, like he's unsure it's the truth, “Really?”
“So bad,” Ashton affirms, a hand working between their bodies to force itself beneath Luke’s waistband into the stretchy shorts he’d changed into before they left Calum’s house. “Wanted to get you home all afternoon. Get you beneath me; get to see all of you. Almost fucking grabbed you right there when we were changing and put you on Cal’s sofa, spread you out right there.”
Luke moans, pushing desperately against the hand in his pants that's wrapped around his cock and he fucking begs for it, voice high and cracked, “Oh God. Please.”
“Uh-huh,” Ashton says, hooking his fingers beneath Luke’s shirt and helping him haul it over his head.
Caught in the heat of the moment, Like scrambles to get it off and shimmy out of his pants and underwear as Ashton does the same, leaving the clothes in a messy pile beside the door before Ashton returns, grabbing Luke by both sides of his face to kiss him.
“So lucky to have you, Lu,” Ashton mumbles against his lips between kisses. “Tell myself all the time.”
Luke bites at his lip, muffling a groan when Ashton takes him back into his hand, jerking him slow and purposeful.
“Such a pretty boy, Lu. Look at you. What a pretty boy.” Ashton kisses him deeper as he fists Luke’s cock, reveling in the wanton sounds Luke lets out.
He moves his hand away a second later, putting his thigh in place of it, pressing it up between Luke’s legs, and he grins instantly when Luke starts to rut against it.
He chuckles quietly to himself at the sight, mouthing at Luke’s jaw once more, his hands moving to Luke’s hips to tug him closer against his leg and he says into Luke's ear, “Couch. Now. Want to put you on my thigh and watch you ride it.”
Luke moans loudly, and follows without a second of hesitation when Ashton pulls away and gets to the sofa, sitting down into the cushions.
He swings his leg over Ashton’s like he's in a rush, straddling his thigh and they both let out sharp breaths at the feel of Luke’s hard-on against Ashton’s bare leg.
Luke hisses out a strained, “oh, fuck,” and instantly begins rubbing himself against Ashton’s thigh, closing his eyes and tilting his head back.
Ashton can’t help but smile to himself, watching how Luke swallows thickly, his throat bobbing, and he says quietly, “God, Lu, fucking gorgeous.”
Luke whines and Ashton takes that as the incentive to reach out and take a hold of Luke’s waist, forcing him to go slower, controlling the roll of his hips against Ashton’s thigh.
“Slower now,” he says, holding Luke down against him, eyes flitting over his body. “Wouldn’t want this to be over too fast, darling.”
Luke clenches his teeth, swallowing again like it pains him to do so, but doesn’t protest, letting Ashton guide his movements.
“There you go,” Ashton praises in the same low voice as Luke’s thrusts slow down to smooth rolls of his hips against Ashton’s leg, and Ashton is drawn to the hard red cock that keeps grazing his thigh. He wets his lips, watching it twitch at his words; how much affect he has on Luke. “Perfect, Lu. Just like that, baby. You’re so pretty for me. Such a good boy.”
Luke chokes, “Want to be.”
“You are,” Ashton promises, smoothing his palms down Luke’s sides to his hips and he hovers there, grinning to himself.
Luke is truly a fucking vision like this. Something out of mythology. Something to be written about, songs and poetry and prose. Something to worship. The blonde loops of his curls around his ears, the hot blush on his cheeks that brings out the speckling of freckles over the perfect slope of his nose.
He’s made of fucking stained glass, this boy. Made of beautiful fragile art and Ashton wants to sit and admire him all the time, give him whatever he needs whenever he needs it. Do nothing but kiss Luke and touch him and praise him every moment he can.
Luke pushes his hips down more desperately, even with Ashton’s hands holding onto him, and Ashton directs his eyes from Luke’s face lower to where Luke is grinding against him, and he notices the quiver of Luke’s large thighs and takes in a sharp breath.
God, he’s gorgeous.
And as his eyes wander, it makes Ashton aware of his stomach, the soft fold of his tummy with how he’s sitting on Ashton’s thigh, the way his body shakes, the ripple of his skin as he moves. Ashton grabs at his hips roughly, pulling him harder down, feeling how Luke’s wide thighs clench around his own leg, how the muscles in his abdomen clench beneath the soft layer of fat that covers them.
“Luke,” he huffs, eyes trained on the soft body on top of him, the way Luke trembles as he hurriedly rubs himself off against Ashton’s thigh, ignoring Ashton’s recommendation to go slower, needy to get himself off. “Luke, honey, you’re goddamn gorgeous. Prettiest boy in the fucking world. Can’t believe I get to have you like this. M’so lucky.”
Luke whimpers, head dropping as he ruts down faster at the words, making the shaking that much more pronounced and, seriously, what is Ashton expected to do but gently slap the side of one of Luke’s thighs to watch it wobble when he does?
“Love these too, you’ve got no idea,” Ashton murmurs and he puts his hands down on Luke’s fat thighs to massage them, digging his fingers into their soft flesh. “Can’t even get my hands around them, Lu. Goddamn. Can’t wait to watch how they’ll shake when I fuck you.”
Luke comes hard onto Ashton’s thigh, panting as his mouth falls open, hips rocking against Ashton to ride the feeling out and Ashton gladly lets him, using his hold on Luke’s thighs to grab him roughly and help him move.
“There you go,” he says as Luke comes down, chest flushed and heaving. “Now, c’mon, let’s get you in bed, baby. Wanna feel every part of you. Get all of you under my hands.”
Luke bites his lip and lets Ashton lead him back to his bedroom as he has so many times before, still trembling slightly from coming.
“Under the covers,” Ashton tells him and Luke does so, slipping beneath the sheets and blinking up at Ashton with big baby blue eyes. How pretty he is. How absolutely stunning.
Ashton eases in after him, bringing the lube with him to coat his fingers and he watches Luke carefully as he does. Watches the soft rise and fall of his panting stomach, how soft it looks, the beautiful flush that’s decorated his pale skin, making him red and lightly shining with sweat, like he’s a flower dressed in morning dew.
“Have I told you how lucky I am yet?” he asks while pushing one of Luke’s legs up.
Luke snorts, smiling at him breathlessly. “Only a couple times. I’ll hear it again.”
Ashton dips down to kiss him, grinning as Luke opens up easily and lets Ashton taste him, tongues pressing together. He says between a kiss, “I’m ridiculously lucky. Luckiest guy ever.”
Luke closes his eyes and he takes in a deep breath as they kiss, one of Ashton’s hands sliding up and down his bent leg.
“Gonna finger you now,” Ashton says, listening to Luke’s breathing hitch. “Nice and slow now, okay, show you how much you mean to me. Show you just how pretty you are.”
Luke huffs and his brows arch up slightly. “I know what you’re doing.”
“What am I doing?” Ashton wonders, as if he's surprised.
Luke stares up at him. Such big blue eyes. “You saw what I did at the pool.”
“You mean how you pinched your side and made a face like you’d eaten a lemon?” Ashton asks. “Yeah, I saw that.”
Luke chews at the inside of his cheek, directing his eyes away toward the wall of Ashton’s bedroom, the expression he sports nothing short of embarrassment.
Ashton tries to draw them back with a soft, “Hey. Luke. Look at me, sweetie.”
Luke mumbles, refusing to look back, “You don’t need to do this.”
“Do what?” Ashton asks him while he continues to rub at Luke’s leg in a tender motion.
“Try to… make me feel better.” Luke swallows. “About being fat.”
Ashton draws his brows in tightly, scowling at the word. It's not even the word, is it? It's more that Luke's given it a bad connotation.
He’s known Luke long enough to not jump right in and tell him he’s in no way fat. It wouldn’t help anything, because once Luke’s gotten something in his head, he’s not going to get out of it.
This kid had himself convinced he was fat back when he was 16 and was as skinny as a rail. Luke’s always had problems with his body. Ashton, sadly, doesn’t think there’s gonna be a time when he fully embraces how beautiful he is. And while it devastates him, it just means he’ll have to try harder to make Luke see it.
“That’s not at all what I’m doing,” he replies curtly, pulling at Luke’s thigh. “I’m not trying to make you feel anything. I’m just doing what I always do.”
Luke finally glances back at him, confused.
“I’m fucking my boyfriend and I’m telling him how beautiful he is, nothing abnormal about that, because guess what, Luke?" Ashton gives him a pointed look. "You’re beautiful and I’m not taking any arguments on that fact.”
Luke opens his mouth like he’s going to protest but Ashton doesn’t let him, abruptly pressing a slick finger inside him, cutting off whatever words he was going to say with a shocked gasp, Luke's thin fingers clawing at Ashton’s shoulder as he exclaims, “Fucking shit!”
“Yeah, you’re full of it if you think you’re anything other than gorgeous.” Ashton thrusts the finger in and out, feeling Luke’s fingers dig into the muscle of his shoulder, searching for purchase as his hips move down against Ashton’s hand without a beat of thought. “Look at you, Luke, see? Look at how pretty you are. You’re unreal. You’re fucking otherworldly.”
Luke chokes on air when a second finger is pushed in, his hips jerking down on the stretch, and Ashton scissors them apart, tracking the way Luke shudders with a small smile.
The way Luke keens at the touches, how his body arches and he groans quietly, trying to bite it back by sinking his teeth into his plump lower lip, and that makes Ashton finger him more purposefully, hoping he can pull one of those sweet little moans from him; the ones where his voice squeaks with it, where it sounds so overcome with need.
“Love your body,” Ashton says gently, fucking his fingers in and out to make Luke whimper, slow and with intent, memorizing how Luke’s fingers grip harder at him. “All of it. Love the way you feel, Lu. All soft beneath me. Love these hips, love these thighs.”
For emphasis, he uses the hand not fingering Luke open to pinch at the handle of his hip, squeeze the soft skin in his hand, feel how it sinks beneath his fingertips.
Luke groans, one of those hitching, squeaking sounds Ashton fucking loves, and he presses in a third finger as a reward for the noise.
“Gorgeous boy. Prettiest boy I’ve ever seen, Lu, you know that.” Ashton slides his hand down Luke’s hip, grabbing his thigh, biting back a sound from his chest when he feels how it gives under the pressure, how goddamn easily it gives. “Fuck. You know that.”
Luke’s legs give a violent twitch when Ashton finds his prostate, Luke’s head falling back on the pillows, eyes squeezed shut, his hair splayed out so elegantly behind his head and his voice so high when he whispers, “There. Oh, God, right there.”
Ashton pushes in against the same spot, proud of himself beyond belief when Luke mewls at the sensation, grinding down onto Ashton’s hand, his thighs shaking as he does, and Ashton has to watch the way they move, the way they tremble, unable to tear his eyes away.
He says, “Love being between these thighs, Lu. Can’t wait to have them around my waist. Can’t wait to feel them squeeze my sides when I push my cock in.”
Luke cries out quietly as Ashton’s fingers press into his prostate and his voice is hoarse when he pleads, eyes shut tight like it would hurt to pry them open, fingers sinking nails into Ashton’s shoulder, “I’m gonna come. Ashton, please, I have to. I’m gonna come.”
“Not until I’m inside you,” Ashton replies simply, slipping his fingers out, reveling in the way Luke sobs desperately at the loss.
Without another word, Ashton gets the condom on and slicks himself with lube, lining himself up, and there’s no warning but a light grab of Luke’s hip before he pushes in.
“Fuck! Yes, yeah, fuck, oh, fuck me,” Luke groans, hips moving towards Ashton as he eases in, clenching his teeth at how warm Luke is, how good he feels, and he lets out a rough moan thinking about how he’s the only one who gets this from Luke. He’s the only one who gets to feel him like this, gets to see him so wrecked and worn down, so fucking needy for more, so needy to be told how beautiful he is.
Ashton mutters through clenched teeth, putting his head to Luke’s shoulder as he bottoms out, their hips flush together, “Feel so good, Lu. So fucking good.”
“Uh-huh.” Luke is breathing in whimpers. “You—fuck, move. Please, please, Ash, move.”
“Get those thighs around me, baby, and maybe I will,” Ashton replies, biting at Luke’s throat, feeling how fast his heart is going, how his breath heaves. “Want to feel them. Want to feel them shake, Lu.”
Luke lets out a broken moan and he raises his legs, wrapping them around Ashton’s waist, altering how Ashton is pressed inside him, and Ashton groans at the shift, a hand going back to grab one of Luke’s thighs tightly, hoisting it up higher, clutching onto it.
He feels the way Luke’s thighs squeeze his waist and he groans, fucking forward, moving Luke’s body slightly up the bed as he does, and Luke’s returning moan is cracked and loud.
“Pretty boy,” he grits out as he pulls Luke onto him by his thigh, sinking his fingers into the soft skin. Each word is punctuated by a thrust that has Luke whining. “So beautiful for me. Love you. Love you so much.”
Luke wraps his arms around the back of Ashton’s neck, legs growing tighter around his waist, and he babbles out, “Ash, I can’t. I can’t. Gonna come. Have to come.”
“Then fucking come,” Ashton replies simply, a hand going between them to wrap around Luke’s leaking cock.
Luke’s body spasms at the words, spilling between their bodies, and his thighs clench around Ashton’s waist like a vice, making Ashton impossibly aware of their softness, how wide they are, how cushiony against his sides and he comes too with a groan, burying his face into Luke’s neck.
“So beautiful, so so pretty,” Ashton continues softly as they come down, panting together, bodies damp with sweat, Luke still beneath him, and when he lowers his thighs, they quiver, and Ashton’s hips respond with a gentle thrust into him that makes Luke whimper.
As he pulls out, Luke lightly wincing as he does, he presses a quick kiss to Luke’s forehead.
He mutters, running his hand down Luke’s side, “Pretty boy. Can’t believe you’re mine.”
Luke laughs quietly, watching Ashton move away to lay beside him and he says in a huff, his cheeks a hot shade of red, “The same goes for you. I love you.”
“Well, that’s to be expected,” Ashton replies cockily to cover up how it makes his heart stutter in his chest every time he hears Luke say those words. How perfectly they flow from his mouth, how nice they sound on his plush lips. “I’m me. I'm very loveable.”
Luke laughs, reaching to pinch Ashton’s bicep. “Asshole.”
“I think I’m charming.” Ashton shrugs, smiling, thoroughly out of breath.
“You would.” Luke rolls over on his side to give Ashton a gentle kiss and Ashton tries to not act surprised by it.
He says quietly when their noses bump, “I love you.”
“I know,” Luke replies, kissing him again. "I'm very loveable."
“Oh, so you agree?” Ashton asks. “You think you’re very pretty?”
“Don’t quote Mean Girls to me.” Luke's dimples have appeared. "You have to earn that right."
“Admit you’re pretty then,” Ashton demands in a whine and Luke laughs. “C’mon. Say it for me. Please, for me? Admit you’re beautiful. Admit it.”
Luke takes in a shallow breath, eyes darting over his face. “I think you’re beautiful.”
Ashton simpers. “Was that ever up for debate?”
“No.” Luke kisses the corner of his mouth. “But it’s nice to be reminded every now and then.”
And he’s right.
Which is one of the many reasons Ashton turns over and pushes Luke back against the sheets, leaning over him to join their mouths in a tender kiss.
Because he’s more than happy to remind him again.
#lapis#this was fan service#yeah but uh this is my first time writing body worship guys#super out of my comfort zone#little wierd#not really into it#://#k love you all#don't judge me for being a pornbot pls im going thru a phase
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Ooh! If asks are open, can I ask you for a mermaid reader x dorm leaders+ octanivelle? Like, its canon that the mc is from another world, so what if she is a mermaid from a world where magic barely exists? Like, she can freely turn human at will but that's about it. Assuming that everyone has a crush on her, but hasn't confessed, how would they react to the reveal?
hello hello ! asks are usually open since i don’t have request limits and i write down all the ones i wanna do in my notebooks (or save them as drafts)ヾ(＠^∇^＠)ノ i get this strange sense of happiness when writing them all down with their categories and specific highlights. i hope you enjoy ! unrelated but someone said that lilia was like rei sakuma and hshshsh ive pulled out all my undead albums and started jamming to all the songs again,, call name, call name, we are undead!
📝to note: (1) i couldn’t write anything about vil ˚‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )‧º·˚ (2) length (and possibly comprehensibility) varies because i ran out of coffee at home and was half-asleep for most of these.
riddle rosehearts
Riddle had been reluctant to even participate in today’s swimming lesson but begrudgingly put on his attire and stood at the edge of the pool, glaring at the water as if it were an old enemy. It wasn’t a total loss, you were there-- nervously fidgeting beside him. He’s been crushing on you hard, to the point that his ears turn red and his stomach flutters with butterflies just with your presence.
From the corner of his eyes, he could see you anxiously eyeing the pool. “Are you feeling alright?” he asks you, voice laced with worry. Your reply came out garbled, like you were trying to say something but somehow forgotten how to speak. He leaves you alone then but would occasionally glance at you, concerned.
When it was time for you to showcase your swimming capabilities, all the worry Riddle had for you simply washed away the instant your legs transformed into a mermaid’s tail fin.
He tries to be nonchalant about it but couldn’t help gawking at you as you did your laps. When you finish and settle to prop yourself up on the edge of the pool in front of him, you catch him staring at you. “It’s strange, isn’t it,” you say, sheepishly smiling to yourself as you collect your wet hair into your hands then wring all the water out of the strands.
“N-No!” he shakes his head with raised hands. “You don’t look strange at all, if anything you’re probably the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen-!” he blurts out, before bringing his hands up to silence his traitorous mouth. You stare at him with wide eyes. “O-Oh, I-,” you fumbled for words as your cheeks tinge red like blooming roses. “I see.”
After that, a silence settles itself in the air, rendering the two of you into amiable discomfiture.
“Rosehearts, it’s your turn!”
Ashton’s booming voice makes you both jolt, ruining the moment. Reluctantly, he smiles at you and heads off.
leona kingscholar
You always had a weird fishy smell to you.
At first, he thought nothing of this and continued to hang around you from time to time. “You know what her scent reminds me of?” Ruggie had told him once while handing him a sandwich from the cafeteria. “She kind of smells like the Leech brothers.”
“What do you mean?”
Ruggie scratches the back of his head. “They’ve got that sea smell to them, you know? Like how most merfolk do.”
Since that day, he’s been trying to find out why you smelled that way. You were magicless so he wasn’t about to jump into conclusions but after doing a little digging and investigating on it for weeks, all evidence pointed to one thing. He didn’t want to pry anything out of you so he kept his mouth shut until the day you revealed it to him.
It was during PE class. You had told Leona that you wanted to tell him something before going over to the school’s swimming pool. He had played it cool and quietly waited on you to say what you wanted to tell him.
“Leona, I’m actually a mermaid,” you say with downcast eyes while twiddling your thumbs.
“Yeah, I know.”
“I know it’s hard to believe but— wait what? You know? How?”
The surprised look on your face makes him chuckle. He gives you a moment to take it all in before going into full detail on how he found out; “You honestly reek of fish.”
azul ashengrotto
Azul thought he knew everything that there is to you. From your hobbies to your favourite music genre to your secret comfort place inside Night Raven College. You happily indulged all of his impudent questions. Yes, you preferred ice cream over cake. Yes, you were losing sleep because of Grim’s snoring. No, you don’t hate him and never thought any less of him after his overblot episode.
He liked your transparency-- admired it even. Around you, he felt like he was underwater but instead of having the constant sense of dread, he was at ease in the waters of your presence. There was never any need to worry over being judged.
Now when you had asked him to show you around his hometown and he had told you to wear something casual, he hadn’t exactly expected you to show up as a mermaid. You were so stunning that he lost his composure just from the sight of you.
“Did you-,” he clears his voice, “Did you drink a potion?”
Laughing, you reply, “No, this is what I really am.”
What you really were. Azul shamelessly examined you for a while as he took you to see boutiques and cafes, envious of your tail’s pale rounded scales and stylish web-like dorsal fins but all the while swooning over how breathtakingly beautiful you looked. When you had asked him if he was comfortable enough to change forms, he lets out a nervous laugh then hides his flustered face.
“I’d rather not embarrass you.”
floyd leech
Floyd had always found you interesting, it’s why he liked to keep close to you.
Whenever you were around, his heart would thump so fast in his chest that he’d grin and run up to you. “Little shrimp~!” was his usual greeting, his voice jingly as he takes you into his arms. He’d never tell you but he liked having you in his arms, as much as it terrified you to even be enveloped in them.
“That’s what you do when you hunt down people!” you complained, “I’m never sure if you’d just like to greet me or if I’ve done something wrong every time I see you.”
“Ah~ That’s the fun in it though!” he said, flashing his sharp teeth at you.
When you transformed in front of him, his eyes widened in delighted surprise. He takes your mermaid form in, ooh-ing and aah-ing at “-how pretty you looked!” before taking you around Octavinelle’s waters and making you participate in make-up competitions just so that he could get to see how fast you swam or strong you were.
jade leech
Jade always had his suspicions.
He wasn’t sure when it started but subconsciously he kept note of the things you did and said before coming into the realization that you have become someone very dear to him. You always spoke about the sea with a fondness that made it seem as if it were your home and frequently asked him to tag along with you to swim around and explore his dorm despite having already done so before. When you had asked him to wait then transformed in front of him before taking him out around Octavinelle, he couldn’t help but feel comforted at the fact that you trusted him enough to reveal this long held secret.
“You’re not mad?” you asked him, shyly peering at him from behind a bed of seaweed. He gives you his signature Jade Leech smile, one that made it seem like he was laughing at your very notion and finding you amusingly silly.
“No, not all,” he says, his eyes crinkling, “in fact, I feel very honored that you’ve told me.”
kalim al-asim
Kalim grew up in the land of Hot Sands where, instead of water, the waves were made of gold shimmering grains and that “swimming” in it would leave you parched and drenched in sweat (he would know, he learned that the hard way!). Now swimming always brought a smile to his face. Partying in pools and sharing laughs with your friends, those were certainly fun!
Though today’s visit to the pool was more of an academic requirement than a time for leisure, Kalim still beamed brighter than any star because he was taking his PE swimming class with the light of his heart: you!
Like a toddler, he swung his feet over the edge of the pool and dipped them into the water beside you. “Aaahhh~ Today’s going to be a really great day!” he twitters on, making you chuckle at his childlike enthusiasm. “Really? Why’s that?” you ask him, sinking your own two legs into the pool and looking at him intently. Kalim, suddenly growing self conscious because of your gaze, looks away and rubs the back of his neck. “Well-” he starts, letting his confidence ease back into him as he meets your eyes, “because I’ll be swimming with you!”
You blink at his words. For a second, you stare at him in surprise but his smile gets to you and makes you laugh. “Yeah, it does feel kinda great.”
When Ashton calls you up to the platform, Kalim positions himself at the other end of the pool and cheers you on. “Go Y/N! Go~!”
Ashton’s whistle blows a second later, making you jump. Kalim eyes widen as he watches you transform mid-air before plunging into the pool. When you surfaced, his heart was sent into a frenzy. Your hair and scales twinkled and your eyes, bright and demure-- you looked like a goddess, emerging from the sea to claim his soul.
The second you change back and dried off, he pops up beside you with gleaming eyes and bombards you with countless praises and questions: “You looked so cool!” “Can you control your shift?” “Your scales were such a pretty bright colour!” “Do you think we can go to sea adventures together?”
idia shroud
Idia didn’t really want to be here.
The only reason he was was because his brother insisted on it and managed to drag him to class before he could properly lock the door. If he knew that PE today was going to be a swimming class, he would’ve persisted to not come at all.
“Ah, this sucks,”Idia mutters under his breath as thoughts of what could have happened if he weren’t here swarmed his mind, feeding into his growing bitterness. Clicking his tongue, he folds his legs into his chest and frowns into his knees then stares at the clear shimmering surface of the pool water.
“What sucks?”
Idia jolts at the sound of your voice in his ear. He moves his head a fraction to the right and somehow almost kisses you with how close your face was to his. Instead your noses touch, surprising you both. “Y-Y-N?” your name sputters out of his lips as his face flushes at the sight of your smile. He squirms to get away from you but only manages to get a few breaths in before slipping.
As he lays on the ground, feeling completely defeated, he brings a forearm over to cover his eyes from the sun’s mocking glare. Ah, the gods are so cruel.
“Idia, are you okay?”
“Aghhhhhhhhhh...”
You helped him up and, though he kept his head low while quietly cursing the gods, he seemed okay. Idia knew you wanted to stay with him out of kindness but when Ashton signaled your group to the platforms, you gave him a small smile and reluctantly headed over to the other end of the pool.
Without you near him anymore, Idia found the strength to breathe again. Quietly, he makes his way over to a secluded corner to rest while keeping his eyes trained on you in the distance. He watches as your complexion changes and thin colourful appendages grow out of your arms and intertwined legs. Along with the heated gaze of the sun, all the shimmering lights that bounced off your scales and illuminated the tiles into a frenzy of dancing colours dizzied him to the point of passing out. As he slips into the depths of his consciousness, a thought echoes in his mind that was far too overwhelming for him to even continue to think about.
My crush is a mermaid.
malleus draconia
You and “Tsuno tarou” were running away from a couple of students that he claims to be after him and somehow managed to to end up hiding behind a rock formation in the outskirts of the Octavinelle dorm. He had used some kind of magic of the two of you to prevent drowning and getting wet and though you were impressed by his incredible magic capabilities, you had no time to express your amazement as he quietly drags you away to hide.
“Why on earth are they after you anyways?” you asked Tsuno tarou, who shrugs from behind you. “They like to keep me under close surveillance.” he replies curtly before peering over your shoulder to watch your two chasers bicker and look around the area. You puckered out your lips at his complete lack of explanation, turning to face him with folded arms, “What do you mean by that? Just-,”
“There! I see someone!” one of them exclaims from behind you, causing you to turn back around and catch a pair of blue eyes staring right at you.
You internally groan as the two of them start swimming towards your hiding place. “Well, I suppose there’s no way out of this. It’s a shame that I’ll have to stop seeing you every night,” Tsuno tarou says from behind you, disappointed. Huffing at his gutted attitude, you face him and take hold of his forearm.
“You and I both know that it’d just be the gargoyles you’d miss because you think that the moonlight ‘encapsulates their pulchritude’,” you tell him before taking in a deep breath and closing off all of your thoughts. “You better start talking about all this later, Tsuno tarou.”
He gives you a confused look then opens his mouth as if to tell you something but you look away and concentrate on transforming. When bands of scales erupted to replace the soft surface of your skin and your legs coiled into each other, you pulled on his weight and began swimming away as fast as you could.
To Malleus, you looked mystical. He didn’t know that you were a mermaid but wasn’t all too shocked to see you transform and gracefully dart across the ocean floor with him in tow. “I meant what I said about missing you Y/N,” he says, catching your attention. You let yourself look back at him for a brief moment before averting your gaze from the intensity of his stare; he told you the truth. Your cheeks grow warm despite the coolness of the water.
“Oh…”
#twisted wonderland#disney twisted wonderland#twst#riddle rosehearts#leona kingscholar#azul ashengrotto#kalim al asim#vil schoenheit#idia shroud#malleus draconia#dorm leaders#headcanons#soriwrites#im so sleepy#no more coffee at home#octavinelle#savanaclaw#heartslabyul#pomefiore#ignihyde#diasomnia#scarabia
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For prompt thingy you just posted bc we keep talking about diva!Luke, Lashton with #58
ok yes i know you said diva luke but for some reason no matter how i tried to write this it just ended up with ashton saying it HOWEVER i did write it in the fairytale au ‘verse so ! i hope i didn’t mangle your au thank u
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Okay. In all honesty, the crystals are fake.
They have real magical crystals, in the back, but those are on request only, because, as Michael and Luke had learned the hard way, some people don’t know how to be responsible with genuine magic items. So they keep the real magical crystals under wraps and in careful storage, and out front all they’ve got are — well, they’re basically glorified rocks. A lot of them are literally glorified rocks. Luke’s in charge of picking decent-looking stones from the ocean floor and glamming them up into something a little prettier. He’s a big fan of pretty things.
Also of pretty people. And pretty werewolves, like Ashton.
Before Ashton, Luke hadn’t even known pretty werewolves existed. He hadn’t really thought a werewolf could be considered pretty. But Ashton is undeniably pretty, in a very scruffy kind of way, and from the moment he steps foot into the magic shop for the first time, roving eyes landing first on the rack of colorful candles and then onto Luke, Luke had been gone.
Since Ashton introduced himself that first day, with a friendly but vaguely wolfish smile that showed only the tips of his canines, Luke has started to look forward to his visits. Not only does he enjoy Ashton’s company and commentary, he also very much appreciates the distraction from annoyingly persistent customers.
“Hey!” Luke cheers, as the chimes over the door twinkle. Ashton enters and meets Luke’s eyes. His face seems to brighten, just seeing Luke. It might just be the lighting in the shop, but Luke blushes anyway.
“Excuse me,” says the woman standing at the counter. Luke sighs and returns his attention to the customer. “I’m asking if I can see the real crystals!”
“Ma’am, if I’ve told you once I’ve told you a hundred times,” he says impatiently. “The real crystals are for magic-users only.”
“And if I’ve told you once or a hundred times, I am a magic user!”
“Tarot reading unfortunately doesn’t fall under the magic umbrella necessary to access the crystals. I’m sorry.” As if they haven’t had this exact fucking conversation before. Ashton makes an apologetic face, and while the woman rummages around in her bag, Luke mouths save me! Ashton frowns, then walks behind one of the shelves towards the back. Luke stares after him. If Ashton’s planning to help, he won’t do much good in the crystal ball section. Unless he intends to knock them all down, in which case Luke will kick his ass.
“You know,” the woman says, throwing her tarot deck onto the counter, “I saw this conversation happening. In the cards. And do you know what I drew when I asked how you would respond? Death.”
Luke resists the urge to roll his eyes. “I’m sorry to hear that,” he says, even though the death card doesn’t mean what this lady obviously thinks it means. Suddenly, there’s a dull thud, and Luke hears Ashton exclaim, “Oh, my ankle! I think it must be broken! Can somebody help me?”
Thank fuck, Luke thinks, and gives the woman his best apologetic smile. “So sorry, ma’am, this is an emergency.” He races around the counter towards where Ashton is. Hidden from view by the shelf, he’s sitting cross-legged on the floor, looking very pleased with himself.
“Pretend you’re actually injured, you idiot,” Luke whispers. Ashton grimaces.
“Ow! I’m in so much pain! I need to get home, stat.”
“I’ll help you,” Luke says loudly, putting an arm around Ashton and helping to heave him towards the door. “Michael! I’m taking this injured customer to the emergency room! Or, um, something like that.”
“You’re what?” comes Michael’s shouted reply, but the tarot woman is giving Luke suspicious looks, so Luke can’t really respond.
“Sorry,” he tells her. “Come back another time?” Or don’t. That’d be good, if you didn’t. He hauls Ashton, who’s making halfhearted howling noises, through the door, and pretends to help him until they’re out of sight of anyone inside the magic shop.
“You’re the worst liar ever,” Luke complains once they’re out of the woods.
Ashton makes an offended noise. “I did you a favor!”
“Michael’s gonna be mad at me.” Luke shrugs. “Oh well.”
“That lady was annoying, though,” Ashton says, shuddering. “I’m so glad I don’t work in retail.”
Luke huffs. “Shut up.”
“So now that you’re free, where are we going?” Ashton asks.
Luke’s feet have already started instinctively taking him home, so he says, “Feel like going swimming?”
“You’re such a one-trick pony,” Ashton says, although he’s smiling.
“I’ll find you a sand dollar,” Luke promises. The first time he’d given Ashton a sand dollar he’d worried Ashton would find it silly or trivial, but Ashton’s grin had gotten so wide Luke thought it would split his face open, and he’d loudly proclaimed the gift to be his favorite he’d ever received. Somehow, though Luke really kind of is a one-trick pony, Ashton’s enthusiasm hasn’t waned. “Or a pearl, maybe.”
Ashton sucks in a delighted breath. “You can find those?”
If he can’t find them, he can probably make them, but Ashton doesn’t need to know that. “Yeah,” he says. “This may surprise you, but I’m pretty good at navigating the sea.”
“Oh, fuck off,” Ashton says as they reach the water’s edge. This close to home, Luke can feel the pull, the very gentle lilt of the waves lapping at the shore mixed with the sun glancing off the water. It’s music, all of it. Luke doesn’t think Ashton hears it, but Ashton has a sort of reverence on his face anyway, and somehow, that makes Luke like him more.
(Not that Luke needs to like him more.)
He dives smoothly into the water and shakes the magic off his legs until all that’s left is his tail, and then he swishes it a couple times to get the feeling back. This transition is always kind of weird, but Luke’s gotten much better at it.
“Are you coming in?” he asks.
Ashton hums lowly. “Do you want me to come in?”
Luke turns pink. “Um. I don’t, like…I don’t want to force you or anything. Obviously. I know it’s — swimming comes easier to me, like, of course, so — but if you want to? Yes? Sure?”
Ashton chuckles. “That was a really long-winded way of saying yes,” he says, toeing off his shoes and cuffing his jeans. “Some siren you are.”
“I’m not a siren,” Luke protests.
“Yeah, I can see why.”
“Hey!”
“Don’t worry,” Ashton says reassuringly, and before Luke can react he jumps into the water, splashing Luke and everything around him. When he surfaces, he says, “You still charm me.”
Luke feels warm despite the cold of the water, and doesn’t stop smiling even when Ashton splashes him.
#i hope u dont hate how i stole your fairytale au even though im sure i did it much worse#SORRY#luke hemmings#ashton irwin#lashton#lashton fic#5sos#5sos fic#fic#my fic#do i really tag all my prompt fics#wow#i am bold#fairytale au#oh fuck ih ave to post a link to chapter 2 also#pixiegrl#ask#answered
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Ash sits inside the room at the Shady House. He looks around the room, and is glad that no one is inside with him. It’s just him and Pikachu, and as comforting as it may seem, it also is worrisome. The though of it being just him and Pikachu is one that is comforting, yet not. Because when it comes down to life, it always just ends up being the two of them. And when Pikachu leaves (because Ash is so sure, everyone does, eventually) it’ll be just him.
Life just happens, and people leave. Eventually people just go and he can’t explain as to why, but he knows that like the sun will set, people will just up and leave. It’s been happening ever since he was little.
He can hardly remember the early days. The days where his father would pick him up and laugh, the days where he would be held and loved by a man who now frightens him. He can’t remember much about the man now, other than the vague blur of memories and the stories his mother and aunts have told.
He remembers being told to be a good boy, and then being held by his mother as she cried tears. She hugged Ash tight and the two watched Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirtles together as her river of tears dried up.
With trauma always comes change, Ash has learned. Every time someone leaves, something happens. Something changes, and Ash learns to deal with it anyway he can.
His aunt has him go to visit his grandmother one day. She drops Ash off with his cousin, going to press a kiss to his head and whisks his mom off for a day of shopping. The sisters go out and pamper themselves, leaving Ash with his favorite cousin Red, who also lost his father. But he’s also with his eldest cousin, Trey, who doesn’t care for anything that isn’t his dumb gameboy and always being right.
His mama comes home that afternoon with her brown locks drastically shortened at her chin, and nails polished in faint pink. His grandmother smiles sadly, seeing the hurt behind her daughters eyes.
“See Del, I told you you’d look good! New cut, new chapter.” His older aunt also has her locks shortened, just not as much.
“Hill, really?” She tucks a strand behind her ear. “Well, Ashy has been a handful lately. it’ll be a bit easier to manage.”
With the disappearance of his father, Ash finds him sitting in a room with a guy to chat with. Ash doesn’t understand, but his best friend Gary says that his Gramps has put him in the same thing when his parents went away.
When he’s seven Gary decides one day to up and leave. He decides that Ash isn’t fun to play with anymore, and that he’s now serious about having friends that are cool and ones that aren’t cry babies.
The leaving of Gary brings tears of anger. It brings his mother with pats on the back and lots of playdates with pokemon outside. He sits on the swings alone, and forces himself to not cry when Gary convinces everyone to not invite Ash to birthday parties.
Just when things couldn’t get worse, Ash watches as his favorite playmate, his beloved cousin Red, go off on a pokemon journey. Red leaves with an eager charmander and eyes of spark. Red makes promises to write and send postcards, but never doe he send any.
Red doesn’t come home for holidays. Not his birthday, not Christmas, not festivals. Red wins a league and doesn’t come back, going to live on the mountain.
By the time he turns ten, he can count on one hand the amount of people who’ve left: Dad,Uncle, Gary, Red. He closes himself off and gathers his partner at the lab. His partner is ready to leave the second he hits route one, the pikachu all sparks and anger.
“Then go! I don’t need you to be a pokemon master!” Shouts are made, and the little rodent thinks to head off, but doesn’t when a pack of spearrow attack. The pokemon watches as Ash saves him, and the rodent vows to never leave Ash.
They meet Misty, and then Brock. The journey starts to feel like maybe he wasn’t meant to be alone, that those he loves won’t leave. But as soon as the time comes, Brock leaves, because people always leave him eventually.
But then Tracey joins, then leaves, because people do end up leaving eventually.
(But then Brock comes back, and it’ shocking because people never come back.)
Bu like all highs, come with high lows. Misty gets a call, and then leaves. Misty doesn’t come back. Because she can’t come back. Misty leaves, and then Brock leaves, too.
(Somewhere, somehow, Red comes back. Red is back and Ash doesn’t know. Gary comes back around when he’s done playing bully. Ash is more suspicious than surprised. More scared than happy. Gary’s back. What the fuck does that mean?)
Ash travels Hoenn alone. He’s met with two siblings, two people who can never leave each other. He claims they’re lucky, and May just laughs and snorts. But then Brock comes back and makes their trio a foursome and it’s strange. People have always left but come back? Never.
(Secretly, Ash is counting down the days when Brock announces that he can’t take anymore of you Ashton. Because it’s bound to happen. He knows it.)
Brock remains until the end of Hoenn, then back to Kanto. May only leaves when she discovers other contests in other regions, and Max can’t travel alone. Once again, Ash ends up alone. This time, he’s sure of it.
Brock returns once again like a boomerang. He’s back in the cold Sinnoh region with Ash and a lovely bluenette. It’s like clockwork, because Ash knows that in the end, they will leave.
Ash goes to Unova, and there is no Brock.Because like all good things, people leave and they don’t come back. Ash hasn’t seen Misty since Hoenn, Ash hasn’t seen May since Sinnoh. Dawn is gone.
They’re alone, and meeting Iris just makes him feel like he’s with a young Gary. (He see Gary sometimes, and they’re cordial. But it’s a change, and Ash isn’t sure why he feels that way.)
Cilan joins, and like routine, at the end of the journey they leave, and Ash makes little preparations to see them again. He doesn’t think they will visit again, because it’s getting harder and harder. He thinks that he’s starting to hit that mark where people are done, where they leave because they all do it.
Kalos brings him alone with Pikachu. A twosome of siblings, and they make him feel the joy he had when it was him and May and Max. But its’ a bit different, because their threesome is joined by a girl with long hair who thinks he owns the world. Suddenly, he’s perfect and his eyes swim with haunt and disgust everytime she lifts him up.
(How can she think he’s perfect? How can not understand that people leave? People go away, and it’s his fault. He’s not perfect. He’s not anything.)
He leaves Kalos with more trauma and more haunting. He leaves with a kiss and confusion, and feelings that make no sense to him. He leaves, and anxiety piles up as he sits in his home, in his bed.
Alola comes, and there’s no league. There’s no gyms, no journey. There’s school and routine, and people don’t just leave. Kukui kisses him goodnight, and like a father, wakes him in the morning. But then he gets married and the twosome turn to three. He tries not to impose. He was the reason his first father left, and he’s sure he’ll be the reason for the second.
(But Burnet stays, and Kukui stays and everybody stays.)
He meets a boy with jaggy hair and a grumpy look. He meets a brother. One that appears mean, but understands each bone in his body. He lets Ash cry and the fears of his father, of his past, his brother doesn’t laugh at. He sits there and nods and listens and then it hits him. He sees the papers and the photographs. He sees love. He sees a man and a woman who love each other and want to get married. He sees young, in love, and he sees himself. He sees how he could get in the way. He sees how he’s been the pest,the kid, the twerp.
He eyes the photographs and just knows he’ll leave too. And when he leaves Alola, he knows he’ll be just another student, just another person. And it’ll be him and Pikachu, then him and Mama.
(And he hopes Gary, that maybe Gary and him will get married. But Ash can’t see that. He can’t see them having the perfect yard or house, because he knows that he’s a trainer at heart and people leave. He can count them all on two hands now. Maybe three.)
Once, when he was seven, he had to go to his therapist. He had to talk about Gary, and about how he was lonely. He was told it appears he has trust issues, abandonment issues.
So as Ash sits alone in the room, petting Pikachu silently, He knows that eventually, it’ll all go away, and his brother will just be another broken boomerang, like the rest.
(He hopes not, for the love of Arceus, he hopes.)
inspired by @raichoose and Red is from @champofpallet
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Slice of Life : Cece & Otto
When: September 12th
Who: @thebickedwitchoftherest & Otto
Where: Cece’s house
Summary: Cece comes home to a familiar intruder.
Warnings: Mushroom manipulation
Work usually kept Cece late Otto knew this, especially in this town which gave him a decent opportunity to get to his target and get out without issue. And yet, he found himself hesitating outside the door. The spells had been a bugger to figure out and by the time he got to the lock he was wondering if this was even a good idea. Wasting time in a fashion that never happened on a job. Not normally. But lately things had hardly been what he’d call normal had they? His hands hovered but eventual compulsion of getting to his target got him moving once more, the locks were trickier, but he managed to get through them eventually. For once (and rather strangely for that fact) he was dressed rather normally, a typically stellar and tastefully coloured outfit tonight replaced with a trim leather jacket over a grey tee and black jeans with boots. Even his hair was flatter today. As though less attention had been paid to that than whatever was going on inside his head.
Otto had been to Cece’s cabin enough time over the years of living here that he knew his way around the space rather easily. The toaster was easy enough to pick up, and he should’ve left. Really should’ve just gone right there and then… Yet looking at the familiar space he was struck with a conflicting sense of purpose. Cece was his friend, one of the few he had left in this town it seemed. Did he really want to go through with this? No. But he had to. And yet he was hesitating, second guessing a typically sure fire and decisive way of life.
How he ended up sitting on the sofa, swigging from her personal store of booze cradling the toaster under his arm, crumbs on his leg staring into space he didn’t rightfully know. But what he did recognise was the sound of a lock clicking into place and a door swinging open.
Cece had worked late, and had gotten home to an empty house. Apparently, her roommates had plans that night, leaving the home empty. She had always forgotten what that felt like. She had lived alone in town for a while before Morgan first moved in and then again once Morgan moved in with Deirdre. But now she had two that kept her company in the house. Cece was a social person, despite running off alone to Maine. It was nice having people around to chat with on particularly boring nights. Plus, Cam and Jane made for good company.
Though Cece wasn’t alone when she walked in her door. Across the open space, Cece walked in on Otto sitting on the couch, staring down the dark screen of her tv. Something was off. And it wasn’t just because Otto was in her living room for some reason. Wait, was that her toaster in his arms? “What’s up. Love the serial killer vibes you’ve got going.” Cece closed and locked the door behind her. She had spells around the house to protect from this, so Otto must have been pretty impressive to get the door open in the first place. “What the hell are you wearing?” In the darkness, Cece could tell that his outfit didn’t seem to shine through the lack of light. It could only mean that he wasn’t wearing one of the colorful outfits that Cece was so fond of. “And why are you spooning my toaster?” So many questions tonight.
Otto took another long pull from the bottle, wiping the back of his mouth on his sleeve, his head lolling to one side as he looked away from the reflective abyss of the television screen he’d been staring at. “Thanks… Thought I’d channel my inner Paul John Knowles,” a tasteless joke perhaps but that was typical for Otto in any given situation. Raising a hand to rub his eyes he sighed.
“Well, they’re these things called clothes, you go to the shop and buy them and put them on to feel good about yourself,” perhaps being a smartass wasn’t the best solution but it felt somewhat normal in a time that everything really didn’t feel at all normal. He shifted the toaster, peering down at it. “I need it for my wife, oh wait-” he looked over at her again “did I tell you I got married? No? Well- I got married… Not like actually married but… you know. Marriage is a trap so I guess it’s pretty fitting that I’m enslaved to a fae who wants used toasters. Fun right?” Man what he’d do for a cig right now.
Something was off, didn’t take Sherlock Holmes to figure that one out. Cece just hadn’t quite figured out if she should be more concerned for her own safety considering a man had broken into her home and was drinking her alcohol or if she should be more concerned for Otto. He clearly didn’t seem like himself at the moment. Neither Cece nor Otto had given much information about their lives before White Crest to each other, but she still considered him a friend. The two knew about the magic and Cece even had a look at that new gravity magic of his. “You know what? I’m just going to take it as a win that you didn’t name a serial who had a thing for pretty blondes.” Cece eventually decided against Otto being a threat and tossed her bag on the ground by the couch, taking the empty seat and holding out her and gesturing for the bottle of alcohol that Otto was nursing. Once she got ahold of it she took a long drink from the bottle and passed it back off to him.
Otto was being a sarcastic asshole, so at least she knew he was still somewhat acting like himself. “Hilarious. Does that outfit make you feel good about yourself then? As opposed to your other outfits? Just curious.” Then he was talking about the institution of marriage, something Cece couldn’t agree more on besides the point that he kept mentioning a wife. Had he completely gone off the deep end? Maybe been love potioned or something? “That’s a lot of information to take in at once, dude. So you’re married. To a woman who wants my toasters? Am I being punked? If Ashton Kutcher’s in here you better tell me because I had a very serious crush on him back in middle school.”
“Now, that would be tasteless, plus I’d never hurt you Ce. You’re my friend, right?” The question hung in the air, a degree of uncertainty around it but he hoped it wasn’t an overstep. The sofa dipped and settled as Cece came to join him on the sofa. What was he doing with his life? He’d run to this dumb little town because of an accident. An accident that had had very real and very serious consequences, thought that maybe he could start again an anonymous face in the crowd. But he was learning the hard way this was definitely not a place you could be anonymous. In fact, Otto felt more exposed in White Crest than he had anywhere else in his entire life. The bottle was easily pried from his hands and Otto opted to sink further into the couch taking it back when it was offered.
“Every outfit makes me feel good, and I make every outfit feel good too,” but the airness remained though it was forgotten in the face of this Ashton Kutcher reference, and Otto’s brows pinched not understanding who or what she was on about. “Who’s? I don’t know who that is or what you’re on about.” The look remained, until he realised “oh no I’m serious… Do you know Deirdre? Deirdre Dolan? Weird woman obsessed with bones.” Maybe she did, “anyway she’s fae - convinced me it’d be a fun idea to go jump in a fairy ring with her and I thought why the hell not? It’s better than… everything else that’s all fucked up in this dumb town.”
“And now I’m now bound to follow her every command… Which includes stealing toasters and turning the swimming pool to mushroom soup…” his expression grew thoughtful as his thoughts sidetracked to mushrooms and mushroom soup “I haven’t figured out how to do that yet but I’m almost there I think.”
“As long as you don’t serial murder me, we’re best friends.” Cece found a way to joke around and wiggle her eyebrows in humor despite the situation. Sure, most friends didn’t consider an especially effective way to prove that friendship was by breaking into their home but hey, White Crest didn’t have much in the way of normal friendships. That being said, Cece would definitely be looking into some stronger protection spells on her door after this. “I dig the confidence, dude. You look cute as hell in that outfit too.”
“Deirdre?” Cece questioned and rolled her eyes. “I’m familiar with her.” As far as people in town went, Cece wasn’t going to pretend that she was her favorite. But considering Morgan seemed so smitten with the woman, Cece had mostly decided to let bygones be bygones. Mostly. Admittedly, the knowledge that the woman was fae wasn’t surprising in the least bit. But what was surprising was hearing about the fairy ring. Cece knew about them, though she had never actually seen one in practice. The coven wasn’t actually entirely convinced that they were real at all, but they never dealt with fae much. “Hold on. I know the general gist of a fairy ring but help me sort between fact and fiction. Does this mean you're sired to her or some shit?” If so, Cece had even more reason to loathe the woman. Either Deirdre made horrible first impressions or Cece had to seriously reconsider Morgan’s taste in suitors. “How naked do you get?”
“What the hell does she have you stealing toasters for?” Cece questioned. If this was some sort of prank, Cece was dying to hear the punchline. If this was some diabolical plan, Cece had trouble seeing the big picture. “Who’s pool?” Cece was actually pretty intrigued by the whole mushroom soup idea, “That’s easy. You just need an alchemist.” Cece pointed at herself, unironically volunteering herself for this stupid fairy ring prank.
“Cool, and at the rate I’m going I think I might be the murderee before you anyway so… Just pick out a nice headstone right? Black and silver. Maybe some purple in there yeah?” perhaps it was morbid to joke about it, but it made Otto feel a little bit better about everything that was going on right now. “Aawh, see, this is why we’re friends. You look cute too, even if you’re still in your work gear. But it’s cute and super professional. Very boss bitch vibe.”
He sighed, long and mournful turning sideways and tucking his feet up on the sofa before taking another healthy swig from the bottle and offering it out for her to take. “Oh well, great. Don’t go to a fairy ring with her if she asks, yeah?” Man this was all so backwards. Otto had never experienced much fae culture, and his lack of exposure to it was showing right now with recent decisions. The migraine was starting to return and Otto closed his eyes tiredly. “Yeah, she called it… a marriage? It’s like a next level fae bind I think. Maybe… I don’t know. I don’t have to make a promise, it’s literally like if she says it I have to do it otherwise I feel like I’m going to hurl.” Tilting the bottle against his knee he stretched out a bit. “Super naked. But that’s not that bad honestly.”
“The mushrooms.” That was the only answer he had. “Any pool, I think the local pool.” He’d been pondering the process himself. “Well I dabble in alchemy but I wouldn’t say no to a hand with it. I’ve got my hands on a transmutation stone, I just need to figure out how to channel it so that it will turn the water to soup.”
“Only the best headstone for you.” Cece nodded in agreement, pretending to take notes on the headstone color, “Here lies Otto, famed toaster thief, breaker of hearts.” Cece put on her best impression of a grieving widow, even using her sleeves to feign dotting at her eyes as if they were drowning in tears. “Damn straight Otto,” Cece gestured at her outfit and modeled from her seat, shooting a grin in Otto’s direction, “I’m taking that compliment, even if this outfit is definitely not by choice and because I have to follow my boss’ dress code. But I even make khaki’s look good.”
“No worries there, I had no interest in doing that before learning about this,” Cece and Deirdre did not communicate much and that was how Cece preferred it. She intended to remain civil for Morgan’s sake, nothing more. Accepting the bottle, Cece took a long drink from it. Regardless of how Cece felt, she couldn’t deny that the situation seemed fucked up. Cece certainly held no high ground when it came to moral compasses, but damn. “That’s intense, dude. I’m going to take a wild guess and say that she hasn’t taken any pity and released you from it either?” Another drink before passing it back over. She couldn’t help her mind from wandering towards the idea of a fairy ring. If a witch could collect the foliage that made up a fairy ring, what sort of magical properties would she have gotten power have? Cece could only imagine the spells that could be put together using those. “Naked huh?” Of course, because Cece had no control over herself her first instinct was to stare at Otto and imagine what that must have looked like. She eventually nodded in approval, “Nice.”
“Vague, but whatever.” What the hell did the mushrooms want with toasters? Cece cursed her lack of fae knowledge. “Shouldn’t be too hard. We literally just need a can of soup.” Cece shrugged, already picturing the process in her head. “Once I know all the ingredients, alchemy is simple. It’s just breaking things down and transmutating it into the new properties. I can help. Seems like a bad senior prank, but at least we’d mark one thing off your list.”
“Sheesh is that what my life amounts to?” it was only in hearing it repeated back to him that Otto had to think how sad his life had become. “Hells, I need to do something about that.” He flopped back, draping one arm lazily over his head as Cece modelled and he had to laugh, bright and genuine. “I mean, what would you wear if you actually had a choice and not a dress code?” It was interesting what a person’s choice of style and clothes could say about their personality. Just another form of expression like anything else.
“Good to know.” His arm sagged a little over his eyes, internally bemoaning the whole debacle. It had been fun, actually he wouldn’t have minded it except for all the hostilities that apparently came along with Deirdre’s blasted girlfriend that he’d barely known a thing about. “Not yet. Like- honestly it’d be fine except everyone is sticking their noses in business, judging me as if this is all somehow entirely my fault. Add on top of that I have this blasted twelve year old child driving me insane about being a fucking exorcist.” He huffed, dropping his hands back into his lap and noting Cece’s stare which only made him roll his eyes and give her a light and playful shove. “Shut up. I don’t need you getting imaginative on me just ‘cause you haven’t gotten any lately.”
“Fae bullshit,” at least that was as much as Otto understood of the matter. “Yeah? Well… I can get the soup and ingredients but don’t we need like for like? I dunno about you but I’m not buying 2.5 mega litres or however much we’d need of soup.. We could probably just use a smaller batch… amplify the transmutation with the stone?”
“Hey, I’m not the one that broke into his friend’s house and is cradling a toaster right now, buddy.” Cece shrugged, the truth was right here smackdab in their faces. But Cece didn’t disagree about doing something about it. Though without knowledge of fae, she wasn’t entirely sure that it was possible to break from it unless Deirdre let him go herself. Fat chance of that happening. It made Cece wonder if she had managed to talk Morgan into going into the fairy ring with her? Would Deirdre do something like that to Morgan? “If it was my choice? A full length ball gown.” Cece modeled, striking various poses before laughing and taking a swig from the bottle, “Nah I’m just fucking with you. I’m basic. I want tshirt and jeans.”
“Yeah well, most people in town aren’t going to believe that if you go into a circle of mushrooms in the woods that you’re bound to do whatever someone says.” Cece had no doubt that Otto had plenty of friends in the supernatural know. Perks of working at a magical bar. But even for people with supernatural knowledge, fae were sort of a wonder. They held their secrets tightly and knowledge about them tended to be more myth and legend than anything proven. “Exorcist? Honestly, it’s a bit impressive. At twelve, I wanted to be a popstar. It’s good to have goals, kid. Keep working at it.” Otto shoved Cece and she was cracking up, flashing her middle finger at him, “I can’t help where my mind wanders. I’m a very imaginative person Otto.” He was right though, she hadn’t gotten any lately.
“Nah. One will do.” Cece waved off the thought. Alchemy was all about the ingredients. Break things with a similar enough composition and you could turn it into anything. “It’s gonna suck for those kids though. Summer’s almost over anyways, go crack a book or something.”
“I don’t need reminding!” he whined, thumping her on the arm again for good measure even if he knew she was absolutely right on that account. But here they were and Otto wasn’t sure he was going to get out of this one any time soon. The talk of clothes was a nice distraction, and he cocked his head, trying to envisage Cece in the tox-room in a full length ball gown featuring rubber gloves and goggles while running a tox-panel. The mental image was enough to make him snort a laugh and it was at that moment he realised why he appreciated Cece so darn much. “Nothing wrong with that, select individuals can pull that off and make it look trendy - you’re one of those people. Granted… this town is full of pretty attractive people I won’t lie.”
“I’ve given up trying to convince the disbelievers, honestly as funny as it is watching them bend over backwards to deny something it gets a bit old in the end.” He pulled a face and shook his head, “not really, I know jack all about ghosts and I’m not interested in them that’s the issue… Turns out an old friend I used to run with lives here in town, they wanted me to cover for them little did I realise they were yanking my chain all along. Now I’m the villain because I helped covered for them. Shows how much loyalty’s worth these days huh?”
The flash of Cece’s middle finger, made Otto roll his eyes good-naturedly. “I’m sure you can’t.”
“I don’t really care about the kids, I kind of just want to do it because I can, you know? Sometimes it’s fun just to flex if there’s no real harm coming from it.”
Cece gave a shocked look at Otto as if she was offended by the arm punch. “Geez, okay Oscar the Grouch. Hitting a lady? The audacity.” Cece’s life had been so consumed with a fake sense of ease and stability with the coven that she had few people she felt completely relaxed around. The two genuine friends she did have within the coven even came with a hint of danger, with their plotting always threatening the safety and trust of the three. Cece enjoyed being able to stay lighthearted even in the sense of immediate danger. Otto’s situation didn’t seem good, but both of them knew that there was no immediate way to fix it. What was the point of being down in the dumps? Cece enjoyed the simplicity of being friends with Otto. Things came easily. “They’re all hot right? I’ve never understood it. It must have some magic magnet that pulls in all the hot people. I mean, it worked on us.” Cece shrugged like this was all the proof that she needed.
Cece pictured Regan at that. Cece had never met somebody so intertwined with the supernatural that still refused to believe in it’s existence, though she respected her boss’ tenacity. That stubbornness was supernatural in its own right. It made some of the more unexplainable jobs at work humorous if nothing else. It really was too bad that Cece had ended up liking Regan so much. “Shit. It sucks, but I’d totally watch that soap opera.” When in doubt, lighten the mood with a little humor, right? That’s what Cece was so convinced fixed any issue? “They’re still running around pulling their scams then, too? Ain’t that some bullshit?”
“Flexing is what I do best, as a matter of fact” Cece held her arm out and curled her fist, flexing the tiny amount of arm muscle that she had and pointing at it in true bodybuilding fashion. “Fair. It’s high time those kids learned how the real world works anyways. Get disappointed.” Cece realized that Otto was still holding onto the toaster and sighed. She didn’t know exactly how this fairy ring shit worked. “I’m not getting my toaster back, am I?”
“We both know you’ll give as good as you get,” Otto quipped, reclining back once more and closing his eyes in mental contemplation of his situation. And the inevitability of it all. “Absolutely, that has to be it… There is no other explanation for why people in this town are all so aesthetically pleasing.”
Nadia was a whole other conundrum. What did he have to do to fix this? And did he really want to do it considering the people invested in getting rid of her were all grade A assholes from the limited encounters online that Otto had with them? They didn’t give him much reason to want to help them and yet a part of him questioned whether he had a duty to do that. But when had he ever truly put the needs of other people above that which suited him? And therein lay the crux of his issue. “I know right? At this point I’m just going to let them play their games and see where they end up… If they win, great, if not I guess they only have themselves to blame.”
“Well then, I guess we need some soup.” With that he rolled back and then forwards propelling himself off the sofa. “Nope,” came the answer with a pop of the ‘p’ for emphasis “it’s gotta be sacrificed. But I’ll repay you for the donation once this is over… Probably.” With a small roll up onto his toes he tilted his head, “come on then!”
The night certainly hadn’t gone how Cece had expected. Otto brought a lot of information to light that Cece wasn’t entirely sure what she should be doing with. In almost all cases, none of this was her problem. Getting involved in more supernatural bullshit was the exact opposite of what she needed. It had been the entire point of escaping to a small town in the farthest possible state from anywhere someone thought Cece would go. This had been a chance to stay low. Clearly, Cece fucking sucked at that. Instead she ended up finding herself right in the middle of some supernatural epicenter, befriending people that couldn’t seem to go a week without attracting some magical clusterfuck of drama.
It was even more unfortunate than that Cece actually enjoyed her time here. The people, the excitement, the drama. Cece had never been much for staying lowkey. She hadn’t been in California and she hadn’t been within the coven either. She wasn’t sure why she thought she had any chance of doing it in Maine either. “You have a real knack for dragging me into your shitstorm, don’t you? You’re lucky I love you.”
Cece rolled her eyes. She guessed she was going to have to explain to Camille and Jane tomorrow why the toaster was suddenly gone. “Oh sure. I’ll wait with baited breath,” Cece laughed, sarcasm apparent in its tone. “I’m going to regret offering to help you, I know it already.” But it was better than sitting at home alone, she supposed.
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rich LA girls (c.h) pt.I
Word Count: 2.5k
everyone’s got issues in LA, Y/N’s just happens to be choosing between addiction and sobriety.
AN : Hey guys I wrote a fic and I hope you like part I ! I really love the show euphoria so i guess this is kinda inspired by that if you squint. TW: drug addiction, swearing, self-image
R-rated folks
You lay on the marble floor of your best friend’s kitchen, the cold contrasting with the overwhelming numbness you felt. You couldn’t remember how you got there, on the floor, but now you wouldn’t dare move. Normally your head was swimming, but currently, your mind was drawing blank after blank. It felt almost peaceful…almost. After an eternity of mindless staring, you heard the doorknob to the front door turning. A surge of energy coursed through you, and you sat up to meet the eyes of your best friend Ashton. “Jesus Y/N, what the fuck” he jumped, shutting the door behind himself. You smiled lazily at him, losing all energy once again. “I thought you were dead,” he half-chuckles, grimacing when he recalls the last time he’d seen you. You were covered in vomit, nearly aspirating after one-too-many doses of heroin. He immediately rushed you to the ER, despite being told it might ruin his career. You woke alone, and couldn’t but feel empty.
Still, Ashton’s lavish pad was home for you, especially since the incident. Ash scooped you up off the floor, placing you on the counter and pecking your cheek. “Glad to see you’re okay,” he nodded, walking over to the pantry and grabbing a few granola bars. He shut the door, meeting your eyes as she peeled one open. You hated when Ashton stared you in the eye like that like he could read your mind. He always seemed to know what you were thinking, or even worse, if you were high. He narrowed his eyes at you, shaking his head. “You’re on right now, aren’t you?” He wasn’t being judgmental, but he was definitely concerned. To his delight, you’d been clean for five days. That accounted for the general haze going on in your brain. “Not used to thinking soberly,” you chuckled softly, stroking your hand through your curly locks. The curls were dehydrated and unruly, but that seemed to be your look at this point. Ashton nodded, pecking you on the nose. “I know what’ll get you back on track. A party.” You wrinkled your nose, shaking your head at how silly he was. “Ash, I am not going to hang around some rich white girls while you get your dick sucked in the bathroom,” you teased, and he rolled his eyes. “There’s my girl. We’re going, so go get ready. I’ll text you the address. I’m going with some of my boys, but I shall meet you there.”
As you headed out the apartment, you clumsily bumped into a taller fellow with a buzzcut. He had a cigarette hanging from his lips and slight dark circles under his eyes. His gaze intrigued you, but not enough to strike a conversation. Before the eye contact grew uncomfortable, you darted toward the stairs at the exit. Upon reaching the bottom, you paused to catch your breath. Once caught, you whipped out Ashton’s Juul and took a quick huff to keep you alert.
Your apartment was empty when you got home. There was a single mattress on the floor of the living room in the corner next to some ramen cups and a dying plant. A sigh left your lips as you stepped into the bedroom. You really hadn’t been home since the hospital. There were still piles of needles, sleeping aids and empty pill bottles surrounding your bed frame. As you glanced around, you fiddled with the sobriety coin in your pocket for grounding. A smile crept onto your face as you quickly trashed the paraphernalia. After, you sighed and looked over yourself in the mirror. You had an athletic build, with a little curve in the hips. Growing up in LA, you learned early on that you’ll never be perfect, and in that you found comfort.
As you combed through your closet, your phone buzzed with a notification from Ash. “Wear something sexy, xx” You blushed, knowing he was teasing. You and Ash were definitely best friends, but on occasion, you two would fool around. You never thought anything of it, and you liked not being in control of your body sometimes. Ash would take control of the situation, even down to when you were allowed to cum, and for some reason it was cathartic. Still, he was your best friend because he knew your mind better than you did, and if helping you cum meant you weren’t going to shoot up then he’d do it.
You grabbed a quick shower, being sure to take particular care of your curls. When you finished, the curls were so defined and lengthened you almost didn’t want to straighten your hair. You stared at yourself once more, being sure to thank your body for being itself. This was something you did often as a girl, and to this day it seemed to give you one less thing to be insecure about. You dressed in a black body con latex dress, did a slight glam eye look, and added YSL stilettos for the perfect touch. The thing you loved about silly LA parties was the possibility of meeting the next big scandal or potentially becoming it by the way you were dressed. After straightening your hair, you pulled it back into a low ponytail. Pleased with yourself, you called an uber to the address Ash sent.
Upon arrival, the party was jumping with people and music. You stepped up to the mansion, slathering on another layer of lipgloss. As you entered the door, you were met with the smell of weed and pineapple-flavored vapes. A sigh left your lips as you tucked your gloss into your breast cup. Glancing around the room, your eyes met Ash. Playfully, you winked and continued on into the kitchen to have a drink. You were pouring yourself a shot of Bacardi when you felt hands ghosting your hips. A smile crept on your lips as you thought it was Ashton, only to hear an unfamiliar voice coaxing in your ear. You attempted to free the grip of the stranger, but they only tightened their grasp. You panicked, eyes darting around in search of a weapon. On instinct, you reached for the nearest kitchen knife, driving it into the stranger’s thigh. They immediately collapsed behind you, crying out in pain. Eyes were on you as you stood above the attacker, eyes threatening tears. “Don’t you ever lay a hand on me again,” you shouted, storming off toward the balcony as people cheered you on. As you pushed through the crowd, you met eyes with the stranger from Ashton’s apartment, and for a brief moment, you felt calm.
The balcony was quiet aside from the music. Feeling anxious was always a side effect at these parties, especially when Ash was nowhere in sight. You stared out over the city, taking a huff of the vape you’d stolen from Ashton, only to realize it was out of juice. A grunt left your lips and you chucked the thing over the balcony, watching it fall. Just as you were reaching into your dress to grab a cigarette, the stranger with the buzzcut appeared next to you. “Y’Have another?” His voice was like honey, and you nearly felt your knees go weak. You nodded sheepishly, handing him one. “It’s warm,” he grinned, and you blushed. The two of you stood in silence, looking out over the city. “Sorry that guy attacked you. I wish I was around I would’ve stopped him, not that you need saving it’s jus-“ You stopped his mindless babbling with a kiss. The kiss was innocent and gentle, but it left you wanting more. When you pulled away, you both wiped your mouths and grinned. “I’m Calum” ‘Y/N’ Your heart sighed at the sound of his name.
The two of you stood at the balcony conversing for a bit about LA parties, growing up in the 90s, and your taste in music. You were about to ask if he’d had any siblings when he took his gaze from the city and stared directly into your eyes. “Wanna get out of here? You can’t do any soul searching in a place like this.” He smiled softly at you, a devious glint in your eye. The two of you took to the streets, and Calum took off running down the large hill the house sat atop. “Calum! No fair! My heels!” You yelled after him between fits of laughter. “Take em off” he shouted from the bottom of the hill, and you grinned, kicking them off and scooping them into your hands. You darted down the hill barefoot, right into his arms. He scooped you up, spinning you around as you both giggled.
After mindlessly wandering the gated community, you called an uber back to his place. Instead of you two heading inside, he kept dragging you along to the nearby park. The moon shined perfectly over the swingset you two sat on, and his face simply glowed in the light. Your eyes traced over his features, searching for flaws or some anchor of reality. Nothing. Perhaps he wasn’t real. A nervous laugh left his lips, and you blushed. “Sorry for staring you’re just, uh, real. It’s refreshing.” He blushed slightly, biting his lip a little. “Yeah, you’re real, too. I used to think I’d never meet an actual person in this place. All the fucking rich kids and not a single one of them have a clue.” His words made you shiver a little. You were praying he couldn’t see right through you, but it felt like he could. “Seems like every girl is addicted to being plastic and social media.” A sigh left your lips, and you felt your heart flutter. His eyes were soft as they took in your features, and his hand gripped your thigh lovingly. “You’re different, and I just really wanna know your story one day.” You laid your head on his shoulder, tears flowing down your face. You wanted to know his favorite color, the way he liked his tea, his favorite songs and the reasons why he cried at night, but you also couldn’t bring yourself to tell him about yourself, about your past.
He kissed you. He kissed you like you were air and he never wanted to let you go. His lips against yours, tongue dominating your mouth was enough to send you flying. His hands gripped either side of your face, just below the ear. The kiss was needy yet gentle, but you needed more. You whimpered into his mouth as his right hand gripped your neck, squeezing only slightly. You felt yourself getting wet, and you just hoped soon he would, too. He broke the kiss to stare at you in the moonlight, and a blush rose to your cheeks. He stood from the swingset, walking over to the small field of grass adjacent to you. You watched as he peeled his shirt over his head, revealing his chiseled frame. A groan escaped you and he chuckled. “Patience, angel” he teased before slipping off his pants and laying them out like a blanket for you. He beckoned you over with his index, and you quickly obliged.
You stood in front of him, sliding your hair over the shoulder to allow him access to your zipper. The dress pooled at your feet, and he gently shoved you to your knees. You lay back, watching as he slid out of his boxers. His length sprang free, and the moonlight shone softly over his swollen head leaking precum. He slipped between your legs and easily mounted you. His length inside you alone caused your back to arch, but the slow and rough thrusts he was giving created the obscene noises fleeing your mouth. “F-fuck, faster please” you whined between thrusts, clawing at his back in an attempt to get his attention. He stared down at you, smirking wickedly. Immediately he began thrusting faster, and your eyes squeezed shut while your toes curled. His right hand gripped your throat, squeezing slightly. “Eyes on me, angel” he grunted, and you blushed softly, forcing your eyes open. You gripped his bicep as he continued drilling into you, grazing against your g-spot and pushing you closer to the edge. The minute you heard him whimper, ‘Gonna make me cum, Y/N’, you teetered over the edge. You groaned softly, thrashing under him as he emptied himself into you. You felt his warmth coating your walls, and the thought of him watching it leak out only made you wetter.
He pulled out and stared down at the work he’d done in awe, smirking. “You’re gorgeous down there, especially in the moonlight” He winked, and you shook your head, reaching for your dress and slipping it on. You slipped your heels on and began walking toward Ashton’s apartment. As you were walking you heard Calum call after you, “What about your number?” You chuckled, continuing your walk.
You opened the door to Ash’s place, walking to the pantry and grabbing a Plan B. As you were tossing the pill back, Ash entered the apartment, rushing over to you. He stared you down in disbelief as you swallowed. “Relax, it’s a Plan B” you giggled, and he sighed softly, pulling you into a hug. You pulled away from him, pecking his nose. “You have fun tonight?” He asked with a smile on his lips, pupils were blown. “Yeah, loser, I did. Now I’m headed to bed. Stealing your shirt.” You walked off into Ashton’s bedroom, stripping out of your clothes and realizing you’d lost your sobriety coin. You always carried to parties as a reminder to stay clean, but now that you’d lost it your heart sank. Tears streamed down your face as you felt defeated, and you climbed into bed to cry yourself to sleep.
You woke in the morning with a massive headache and numbness in your chest. Last night was like a fever dream. You hadn’t noticed your hair was frizzy once more, you had raccoon eyes from your mascara, and you were missing an earring. You sighed softly, walking over to the bathroom and rinsing your face with water. You reached under the medicine cabinet, feeling for your secret stash of cocaine, but found nothing. You sighed, storming off out of the bedroom. As you entered the hallway, you could hear voices from the living room. “Man, I fucked this girl last night and it actually felt like I was fucking an angel. She was like heaven to me. “ You gasped softly at the sound of Calum’s voice and stood flush against the wall. You knew you should’ve walked away, but you didn’t. “She was so real, so breathtakingly real. I didn’t even like, wanna fuck her and dash, but she left before I could ask her to come back to mine. She also left behind this weird coin, I think it’s for sobriety?” With that, you stormed into the kitchen, taking the coin from Calum.
Let me know what you think!!! Please!!
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re: triggers. I don’t think most people expect to live in a bubble but instead to curate a space on here. If people do tag triggers, they know it’s at least a bit safer for them to follow that blog. For me, it’s really dependent on the day, some days it’s an uncomfortable thing to look at triggers but other days it’s the difference between a panic attack. I’ve always viewed them as a courtesy, regardless of effectivity, the time used to tag is negligible to me but invaluable for someone else
I’m adding everything below the line because I think some people aren’t ready to read this but also don’t want to add tws because there are others who need to have the option to see it.
So I read your ask and decided to take a shower and get my thoughts somewhat together in order to get the best response out. Instead, my mind went a mile a minute in all directions, but that’s nothing new.
Let me preface this by saying I understand that not every trauma is the same, same as how not every person reacts or copes with trauma the same. This isn’t me trying to say that not everyone’s struggle isn’t valid, it’s just my way of reaching out, giving a helping hand and a bit of food for thought for coping.
I keep saying I was raised differently because it’s the truth, might be European but I definitely don’t share the same values as most Europeans (or the image the world has about Europe, which is basically the UK and France). Here things are done differently, tws are almost nonexistent, to an extent you’re considered a lesser human being if you have (so many) triggers, and I’m not saying that this is good. Compassion is rare and understanding even rarer, more often than not, we’re left to our own devices and we can either sink or swim.
But then you have western civilization that comes labeled and prepackaged, where everything is written in fine print, everything is valid, everything is marketed so well that you have no other choice but to believe the seller. I’ve also had the opportunity to experience this, so I know a fair share of how this machinery works too.
I’m always trying to find a balance between the two, because it’s not the Dark Ages, but life also isn’t meant to be so sterile (or portrayed as sterile but I’ll get to that later). And this is where trigger warnings come into play.
We’ve all experienced trauma, either small or big. I won’t bore you with mine, but I can tell you that I’m not immune to triggers. It’s true that I seemingly don’t have them, and if you asked me a couple of hours ago I would’ve said that I don’t have them at all, but upon reflection, mine are just emotional and circumstantial. I don’t get a panic attack from words or images, but I might spiral down from a feeling that a situation might cause (like, say, a sudden right turn in a vehicle or as was the case a few days ago, feeling like my support system is being dismantled, I like my balance, alright?). These are all things I can’t help but fear, but I can learn to cope with them and lessen my reaction to them over time.
But enough about me, the whole reason I started questioning the tws in the first place was because of the overwhelming reaction people on the internet had of the prospect of Ashton’s video/song coming out. I’m talking people literally screaming ‘NO’ but also not wanting to be left out. And this makes me so sad, not because of Ashton or because his work might flop, but because they are missing the whole point of his song. Yes, it’s definitely his way of coping (I don’t buy that bs that it’s only about Harry, like... entering the industry at the fragile age of 18 can cause all sorts of trauma), but it’s also his way of helping other people cope, telling them that their struggle is valid but it can get better if you only allow yourself to get better. By putting a tw on it, it’s not reaching the people it’s supposed to reach, but also, the prospect of knowing that there’s a song about BD but not really hearing it is only leading your brain into thinking about BD, but without the educational guidance the song would provide. I hope I’m making sense here, like you’ll just overthink and reopen old wounds, which will lead you to feel worse about yourself. You can’t unlearn this information, same as how you can’t put a tw on the news that Ashton is releasing a new song.
I made the parallel between the civilizations because my brain went on a different tangent that may or may not be related to coping mechanisms. Whenever I’m made aware of the difference between both worlds I can’t help but think of The Time Machine by H. G. Wells. Definitely a good read (if you haven’t read it already), but my focus was on the Eloi as a concept. It’s alarming how it translates to modern-day society. For reference, the Eloi were descendants of humans, a species that evolved from (what I gathered as) first-world society, and to fit my narrative, I’m gonna say Western civilization. They had access to everything because of their wealth, from education to food to leisure activities, but they always chose the shorter path or should I say the easier path. They chose to be sheltered from the growingly disproportionate world around them, to the point where they were living under the illusion that everything is alright and they could roam free as long as the sun was shining. They were also scared shitless of the dark because that’s when the Morlocks came out of their tunnels and preyed upon them. Morlocks were another descendant of humans, evolving from the working class and the poor which were pushed to live in the tunnels to cater to the needs of the Eloi.
Now take my short recap as the Eloi being people with trauma and the Morlocks being the trauma itself. Is living in constant fear of the dark really what you want? Or is that something society tells you is okay because there’s nothing you can do about it, so you should stay that way? And what exactly does society get out of telling you that trauma is irreparable?
This is what I meant by the world being portrayed as too sterile. It just can’t be, we’re not the ones who decide what’s gonna happen, so we shouldn’t be disillusioned that it’s up to us. Tws are there to help you in the moment, but they aren’t a coping mechanism. They’re just a veil we put over things to make them look blurry and to give them a less scary filter so that we can forget they exist.
And this is what I meant when I said that not every trauma is the same. It comes in different degrees, but it also comes from different irritants. Not everything is because the world was mean to us, sometimes we were mean to ourselves, and we need to learn to love ourselves in order to cope. This is where, in my opinion, tws are counterproductive. Turning a blind eye on what we do to ourselves and romanticizing trauma and martyrdom is only gonna make it worse.
Before people say I’ve gone crazy in saying this, let me just remind you that I lived through emo szn (I only caught the ends of it, it was mostly the era of ppl born in the late 80s) where self-harm was the norm and trendy and as a person with too many issues with the image of me in my head, I found it appalling that people thought that having scars was helping them. Like... reading fanfics back then, they were FILLED with mentions of self-harm. Say what you will but pop-punk/emo as a genre helped kids feel more understood, but it also popularised physical pain as a way of dealing with trauma, no matter the degree or the outcome.
There’s a prevalent theme in every generation, I think there might be a science behind it all, but it’s almost like there’s depression lurking in the background, but there’s a trend every 5-10 years or so in how we choose to manifest it; self-harm, EDs, drugs, alcohol, adrenaline, violence. Understanding this might help us understand that there’s a root to our trauma, and if we manage to kill it off, we might defeat it. But by adding tws, we’ll never get to this conclusion. We’ll just let society run us over and let us feel like shit.
Did any of this make any sense? Probably not. I’ve been writing this for a few hours now.
My main advice is to get to know ourselves, to learn what really makes us tick. Introspection can help in finding out which trauma we can deal with, and which one needs to be left on the back burner for a bit. The lesser ones we can cope with one step at a time, until we’re out of the prangs of fear, and we can look back and say “I used to be scared of you, but I no longer am. You hurt me, but you no longer do.”
Please think twice before relying on a tw.
As for my blog, I don’t think I’ll tag too many tws, not because I don’t care about your wellbeing, but because I am not an organized person no matter how much I try to be. I also try to steer clear from things that might generally be considered triggering, but you’ll have to believe in my judgment of what’s acceptable or not. If that’s not something you can do, I totally understand if you unfollow me.
Last piece of advice coming from a person that was just another cog in the marketing industry: Don’t fall for everything that’s been sold to you. You don’t have to do anything online. Something you saw on a blog makes you feel bad? Unfollow it. An event you read about in the news is triggering? Shut your computer down. A social media platform is making you feel like shit because the users are shit? Deactivate asap. Remember that information comes to you in binary code, and at the end of the day, that’s how you should treat everything that you consume online, even tho I might be a person on my side of the screen. Life is much more spicier and colorful when you’re out there in the real world, don’t let the overload of information coming from the virtual world stop you from feeling alive.
#sorry this is so long#i just realized that i braindumped a lot on this ask#don't know if it even makes sense now but at least you'll get to know me a bit more lol#have yourself a great day/night wherever you are#user in incognito mode#asks
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Best Motivational Quotes to Overcome Anxiety and Depression
Moving statements and motivational quotes to overcome anxiety and depression have a stunning capacity to change the manner in which we feel about existence. This is the reason I find them so intriguing and significant on our ways to progress.
So what's their mystery?
The manner in which you contemplate yourself, including your convictions and assumptions regarding what is workable for you, decides everything that transpires.
To be successful, you have to use each day as an opportunity to grow, to find purpose in life, to be better, to get a little bit closer to your goals. It might sound like an impossible thing or a lot of work—and with a busy schedule, next to impractical. But the best part is, the more you get the results, the more you’ll want to work hard, the higher you’ll want to reach. So as long as you have the hunger for success, you will always have the power within you to achieve it.
You have full oversight over just a single thing known to mankind — your reasoning – and that is the place inspirational statements come in!
Everybody needs a little motivation now and again.
Regardless of whether you're experiencing a separation, you've recently lost your employment, or you just woke up feeling a little shaky toward the beginning of today—we've all had nowadays.
I've assembled a rundown of probably the best-overcome anxiety and depression quotes so you can begin the year by assuming responsibility for your considerations, thinking emphatically and defining new objectives.
Dont Forget to read the best Dalai Lama Quotes and Sayings to bring a positive change in your life.
“You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” – Dr. Suess
Motivational and Inspirational Quotes
“I think being in love with life is a key to eternal youth.” —Doug Hutchison
"I’m a success today because I had a friend who believed in me and I didn’t have the heart to let him down.” – Abraham Lincoln
“The purpose of our lives is to be happy.” — Dalai Lama
“Feelings don’t try to kill you, even the painful ones. Anxiety is a feeling grown too large. A feeling grown aggressive and dangerous. You’re responsible for its consequences, you’re responsible for treating it. But…you’re not responsible for causing it. You’re not morally at fault for it. No more than you would be for a tumor.” ― Patrick Ness, The Rest of Us Just Live Here
“Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.” — John Lennon
“Get busy living or get busy dying.” — Stephen King
“You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.” — Mae West
“Not how long, but how well you have lived is the main thing.” — Seneca
“If life were predictable it would cease to be life, and be without flavor.” – Eleanor Roosevelt
“How can a person deal with anxiety? You might try what one fellow did. He worried so much that he decided to hire someone to do his worrying for him. He found a man who agreed to be his hired worrier for a salary of $200,000 per year. After the man accepted the job, his first question to his boss was, “Where are you going to get $200,000 per year?” To which the man responded, “That’s your worry.” ― Max Lucado
“The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.” —Dolly Parton
“Do all the good you can, for all the people you can, in all the ways you can, as long as you can.” — Hillary Clinton
“Don’t settle for what life gives you; make life better and build something.” — Ashton Kutcher
“Everybody wants to be famous, but nobody wants to do the work. I live by that. You grind hard so you can play hard. At the end of the day, you put all the work in, and eventually it’ll pay off. It could be in a year, it could be in 30 years. Eventually, your hard work will pay off.” — Kevin Hart
“Everything negative – pressure, challenges – is all an opportunity for me to rise.” — Kobe Bryant
“I like criticism. It makes you strong.” — LeBron James
“You never really learn much from hearing yourself speak.” ― George Clooney
“Life imposes things on you that you can’t control, but you still have the choice of how you’re going to live through this.” — Celine Dion
“Life is never easy. There is work to be done and obligations to be met – obligations to truth, to justice, and to liberty.” — John F. Kennedy
“Live for each second without hesitation.” — Elton John
“Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving.” — Albert Einstein
“Life is really simple, but men insist on making it complicated.” — Confucius
“Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.” — Helen Keller
“Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it.” — Steve Jobs
“My mama always said, life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.” — Forrest Gump
“Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.”— Lao-Tze
“When we do the best we can, we never know what miracle is wrought in our life or the life of another.” — Helen Keller
“The healthiest response to life is joy.” — Deepak Chopra
“Life is like a coin. You can spend it any way you wish, but you only spend it once.” — Lillian Dickson
“The best portion of a good man’s life is his little nameless, unencumbered acts of kindness and of love.” — Wordsworth
“In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: It goes on.” ― Robert Frost
“Life is ten percent what happens to you and ninety percent how you respond to it.” — Charles Swindoll
“Keep calm and carry on.” — Winston Churchill
“Maybe that’s what life is… a wink of the eye and winking stars.” — Jack Kerouac
“Life is a flower of which love is the honey.” — Victor Hugo
“Keep smiling, because life is a beautiful thing and there’s so much to smile about.” — Marilyn Monroe
“Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship.” — Buddha
“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose.” — Dr. Seuss
“Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.” — Mark Twain
“Life would be tragic if it weren’t funny.” — Stephen Hawking
“Live in the sunshine, swim the sea, drink the wild air.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson
“The greatest pleasure of life is love.” — Euripides
“Life is what we make it, always has been, always will be.” — Grandma Moses
“Life’s tragedy is that we get old too soon and wise too late.” — Benjamin Franklin
“Life is about making an impact, not making an income.” — Kevin Kruse
“I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” – Michael Jordan
“Every strike brings me closer to the next home run.” – Babe Ruth
“I’ve spent most of my life and most of my friendships holding my breath and hoping that when people get close enough they won’t leave, and fearing that it’s a matter of time before they figure me out and go.” ― Shauna Niequist, Bittersweet: Thoughts on Change, Grace, and Learning the Hard Way
“The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.” – Mark Twain
“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage.” – Anais Nin
“When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down ‘happy’. They told me I didn’t understand the assignment, and I told them they didn’t understand life.” – John Lennon
“Too many of us are not living our dreams because we are living our fears.” – Les Brown
“The whole secret of a successful life is to find out what is one’s destiny to do, and then do it.”– Henry Ford
“In order to write about life first you must live it.”– Ernest Hemingway
“The big lesson in life, baby, is never be scared of anyone or anything.”– Frank Sinatra
“Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.”– Thomas A. Edison
“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”– Albert Einstein
“Never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game.”– Babe Ruth
“Money and success don’t change people; they merely amplify what is already there.” — Will Smith
“Sing like no one’s listening, love like you’ve never been hurt, dance like nobody’s watching, and live like it’s heaven on earth.” – (Attributed to various sources)
“Curiosity about life in all of its aspects, I think, is still the secret of great creative people.” – Leo Burnett
“Life is not a problem to be solved, but a reality to be experienced.”– Soren Kierkegaard
“To venture causes anxiety, but not to venture is to lose one’s self…. And to venture in the highest is precisely to be conscious of one’s self.” ― Søren Kierkegaard
“The unexamined life is not worth living.” — Socrates
“Turn your wounds into wisdom.” — Oprah Winfrey
“The more you pray, the less you’ll panic. The more you worship, the less you worry. You’ll feel more patient and less pressured.” ― Rick Warren, The Purpose of Christmas
“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking.” – Steve Jobs
Thank you for giving your time to read these beautiful inspirational and motivational quotes about anxiety and depression. Stay connected for more.
Source: Best Motivational Quotes to Overcome Anxiety and Depression
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95. “Educate your eyes, and the world will come into focus.” - Eddie Ross
Shot of whiskey, or a bottle of Smirnoff?
Smirnoff please!
Would you consider yourself an adventurous person?
To a certain extent, all depends really.
Have you ever snuggled with someone you weren’t dating?
Yeah.
What were you doing at 11 pm last night?
Sleeping.
How often do you hold back from saying what you are thinking?
LOL. Quite often haha.
Are you doing this because you’re bored?
Yeah pretty much lol.
Would you consider yourself heartless?
Unfortunately not.
Do you ever wish you were the opposite sex?
Maybe around a certain time of each month lol.
If you could go on ONE DATE with any celebrity, who would it be?
Calum Hood or Ashton Irwin.
Have you ever been afraid of being underwater?
Yeah, I’m not much of a swimmer so being underwater usually isn’t ideal for me haha.
Would you ever scuba dive in shark infested waters if you had the chance?
Fuck no lol.
If you woke up and no one was home, would you wonder where everyone is?
All depends on the time.
Have you ever been drunk at work?
Yeah, but I wasn’t working. One of the bars in town is really close to my work.
Have you ever hit a parked car with your car?
Yup lol.
If you just drank 15 beers, what would you be doing?
I wouldn’t even be able to drink a half of one, can’t stand the taste.
What would you do if your girlfriend or boyfriend didn’t like your friends?
That would really suck, tbh.
Have you ever slept on the floor with someone you like?
No, but I have slept on the floor before tho lol.
Have you ever woken up next to someone and were freaked out?
Nope.
Would you take a road trip with your friends?
Well yeah!
Which do you prefer: french toast, bagels, or cereal?
French toast, yummy!
Do you prefer light or dark haired?
On me? A mixture of both, on a guy? Doesn’t really matter.
Do you have photos up around your room, of you?
Nope.
If you’re extremely quiet, what does that mean?
I’m tired, pissed off, angry or sad.
Do you have a hard time controlling your emotions?
All depends on my mood.
Ever been suspended from school?
Hehe, only once.
Does it make you mad when people stare at you?
I wouldn’t say mad, but annoyed if anything ... or paranoid lol.
Do you prefer pens or pencils?
Pens.
Have you ever read any of the Chicken Soup for the Soul books?
Yeah, I’ve read the majority of the teenage ones.
Last person you were in the car with?
Mom.
What time did you wake up this morning?
4:25am.
Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to?
No, not really.
How tall are you?
5′5″
How many drugs are in your system?
Just my prescribed ones.
What foreign language do / did you study?
Core French.
Do you own sunglasses?
Yeah, prescription ones.
Where is the next place you will travel to?
I don’t know, good question.
Do you say sexy a lot?
Not very often.
Do you want to cut your hair?
No, I just had it cut lol.
Do you have empty bottles of alcohol hidden somewhere?
Nope.
Do you miss anyone?
Yeah, there’s a few people.
Think back to your most recent relationship — Serious or not? Was it worth it?
That one was my first one, about 5 (almost 6) years ago, wasn’t very serious, and definitely not worth it cause it didn’t last a week because he was an ass lol.
Who was the last person in your bed?
Me.
Don’t tell me lies, so is the last person you texted attractive?
My Papa? Umm sure? Just not for me lol.
Where is the person you last kissed at this moment?
Fuck knows, and don’t care lol.
Have you ever sneaked someone over to your house?
Nope.
Is it okay if you kiss people when you’re single?
Yeah, as long as you’re both single, who cares?
Do you think it’s possible that you could move on from someone, and then redevelop feelings for them?
Yeah.
How’s your hair right now?
In a messy ponytail.
Do you only wish the best for your ex?
I wish for him to grow up and mature, so yeah in a way I guess.
How are things between you and the person you like?
Well, he’s my friend’s brother, and I really only see him at work ... soo ...
What were you doing at 4 AM last night?
Still sleeping for another 25 minutes lol.
Who was the last person you talked to before you went to sleep last night?
My mom and little sister.
What time did you decide to get out of bed today?
4:25am, had to go to work for 5am.
Did you straighten your hair this morning?
No, but I did this afternoon for Christmas Eve/Nana’s birthday supper.
When was the last time you laughed really hard?
Not sure, maybe a few days ago?
What do you hear right now?
WWE on the TV.
If you were breaking up with your girlfriend/boyfriend, what would you most likely say?
Not in a current relationship.
Do you think that once people get married, they eventually fall “out of love”?
Not everybody. Some people are lucky and others not so much.
Ever had a near death experience?
Well I almost drowned a few years ago, but my friend was with me that could swim so I was very lucky.
Where’s your cell phone?
Right next to me.
What is the last thing you thought about?
Where my cell phone was lol.
Do you regret anything?
There’s a lot of things that I wish that I did differently, but I’m working on putting those things in the past where they belong.
Who would you like your next “fling” to be with?
At this point, I don’t see myself getting into a relationship at all. I’ve basically given up all hope on that.
Are you slowly drifting away from someone close?
Oh probably.
When was the last time you saw the person you last kissed?
I think its been a few weeks actually. Surprising because he usually comes into my work almost everyday.
Do you like your phone?
Yeah.
Last alcohol beverage?
Smirnoff ice.
Have you ever slept in a bed with the opposite sex?
My cousin when we were younger.
If you had to move in with a friend, which one would you pick?
Either Bekah or Ashlee.
What do your friends call you?
Michelle, Shell, or Meeshy.
Who was the last person to go to the movies with you?
Bekah I think? Either her or Sarah.
Are you currently fighting with someone?
Nope.
Last time you had butterflies in your stomach?
A few days ago.
Do you mainly use your house phone or your cell phone?
Cell phone.
Is there an empty place in your heart?
Yeah.
Do you count down the days till anything?
Yeah, Christmas, birthdays, and vacation/days off.
Are you looking forward to something as of right now?
Tomorrow, Merry Christmas!
Have you ever been called a tease?
Not that I can remember.
What are your chances of getting with your crush?
I would say anywhere between 0-0.5%.
Are any of your friends so close that you consider them family?
Yes <3
Anyone told you a secret this week?
Not that I can remember.
Do you hate anyone?
Mhm, for very good reasons.
Last time you wore the opposite sex’s clothing?
Right now, I bought a Superman shirt in a men’s size lol.
What do you want in your life right now?
Money please.
When was the last time you laughed so hard you thought you were going to cry?
Good question.
Do you trust people easily?
Not in the slightest lol.
Proud of anything right now?
Yeah.
Have anything on your mind?
Just the usual.
Favourite type of music?
Rap.
What band/group have the most lyrics that represent you?
Eminem or Linkin Park.
Pass or fail a drug test if you took one right now?
Pass.
Do you drive?
Yup.
Own a car?
Yup.
Best season?
Autumn.
Who’s your best friend/s?
Bekah and Ashlee.
Would you rather sing or dance?
Can’t really do either lol.
One thing you really want to learn?
Fluent French.
What’s your favourite tv channel?
Not sure, I don’t watch much TV that much.
Name your favourite programs?
WWE, Big Bang, and any crime shows/documentaries,
What are you doing this summer?
Working.
How many times have you been on a plane?
0 and more than likely will stay that way lol.
One thing you wish for?
Happiness.
Do you get jealous easy?
No.
What colour is your hair?
Dark brown with blonde highlights.
What night club plays the best songs to dance to?
Not sure, I don’t really go out to bars.
Made up with anyone recently after an argument?
No.
Missing anyone right now?
Yeah.
Do you use MSN?
Used to.
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My Dumbass 5SOS Experiance // Part Uno
I know exactly what you’re thinking. I know, because well, I am one of you. The 5SOSFam that is; I made it sound like we’re our own separate alien race. But look at the people we stan... It makes a little too much sense, doesn’t it? Not even a paragraph in, and I’m already unraveling a conspiracy theory like Shane Dawson. You know him- “You look so fucking something, in my underwear while she wearing them! There’s my poop stain, on her butt.” Yeah, that funny motherfucker.
You’re probably thinking- ‘Oh, just another fan who really wants the same thing I do.’
I’m not gonna pretend, or lie to make my situation seem special. You’re fucking right, that is exactly who I am. We all have our bumps in the road, after all, we’re all human. Or aliens, I don’t really know anymore. It’s not only science that has gone too far at this point, I am now a contributing factor to the random things that make you question what the fuck this world is becoming.
I’m not about to level with you, or give you a sob story. It could seem that way, but every detail I write is a detail I wouldn’t ever erase. Every problem I’ve encountered, or dumb ass decision I’ve written is something that made me the well rounded person I am today. These are past events, though I am currently handling some of the debris of them. I’m still coping with illness, and things like that. When I write these events, just know, while they are awful I am used to them. That sounds bad, but I don’t know any different. They do hurt greatly at times, but that’s just building more character and strength in the end.
-Trigger/Graphic Event Warning-
Let’s start out simple and #relatable; I struggle(d) with:
Bi-Polar Depression (Mood swings between extremely jolly, and devastatingly upset.)
Anxiety (Having a hard time staying composed in times of little stress, or in many social situations.)
Insomnia (Getting little to no sleep/getting no well-rested sleep at night.)
Self-Harm (Hurting yourself in ways such as eating disorders, or various forms of mutilation.)
Suicide (Trying to end your own life.)
Those are the things this is somewhat covering, but by no means are they the point I’m trying to make. They aren’t what make up me, and they aren’t what make up this letter.
To understand the substance of the seemingly overused words on your screen, you need to know a bit about who I am first. Otherwise this could seem like every generic fanfiction. You know what I’m talking about. Eyes are always called orbs. Every meeting involves someone spilling something on someone else. Dicks are always refferred to as members. Calum is usually an asshole with a tragic life story. Mikey is usually a bad boy; who gets a soft spot for the main girl for some unknown reason. Ashton is either super sweet in his old dad way, or a complete arrogant prick. Luke, well he always bounces between popular and nerdy often. Have I made my point?
I’m gonna get relatable again when I say, there isn’t a lot I’m good at. When I am good at something, it has no use in my daily life. I can’t divide fractions, but I can hit every note in guitar hero. I can’t socially interact, but I can make bomb-ass Turkey Bacon Cojacks. I don’t know where all the states are, but I can rap Migrane. My skills are only useful to me, basically. My point being, I was practically useless in class. When I was staying home from school on the normal, from avoiding my problems and lack of motivation, I felt so useless. Like as useless as a newspaper is to a teenager.
We all have some activity that makes us feel important, though. To Donald Trump, it’s putting down anyone who isn’t a straight white male. To Bo Burnham, it’s making people laugh with his odd perspective and unique means of comedy. Me? It’s always been when I’m on stage. I love hearing my voice being amplified to bring together people from all walks of life. When I’m writing lyrics, I feel like every syllable can make a difference in someone’s life. There’s just something thrilling about worrying you’ll sing the wrong lyric, and doing so because you were worrying about it.
I’m not gonna say this was always my passion; when I was younger I made a very motivational speech about wanting to be a mermaid. “I WILL be a mermaid, and I WILL live under the sea.” If you think that’s odd, I know of a kid who wanted to be a trash compactor. After I discovered I couldn’t grow a tail, and I ended up not being a fan of swimming in a casino, I wanted to preform. That’s been my dream since I can remember. I’ve always been pretty witty, like I’d have to leave my wit behind before boarding a plane it’s so sharp. I learned I get more happiness when making others smile, than I do by making myself smile.
A stage is the one place I’m not useless, and being a musician is what I was born to do. I will look anyone in the eye and tell them I'm gonna be so famous one day, because that's exactly what I believe. I know I'm not where I want to be, so it's as simple as I'm gonna move. You need to remember that the only way you can fail is if you give up. It's pretty annoying how bad I am at that. I don't only try to achieve my goals, I try to over-achieve them. I live off my intuition, I'm definitely the ride-or-die type of person in EVERYTHING I do. Making a fool of myself? I'll record it so people can hold it against me for the rest of my life. Dissapointing my parents? Well I am going to Uni for music with no back up plan. Meet 5sos? Well... That's where this fiasco begins.
Welcome to the jungle my fellow fam.
Let’s go back to the first weekend of May 2017. Yes, I really did start this journey on a weekend in May. Yes, I really did it just so I can make that reference. Maybe I started a bit before that, but I committed to it on that first Saturday. At that time I had been in the fam for a couple of months, and I did go through the phase when I couldn’t tell Lucifer and Ashtonio apart. I however didn’t assume Calcium was Asian, I assumed he was Hispanic. I mean have you seen the ‘Hey Everybody!’ video? That was rhetorical, of course you have. He walked dogs, he was practically Ceasar911!
Well at this time I was still self-harming, I was still suicidal, and music is very influential to me. I tend to form bonds with songs because music tends to be my main comfort. Music has always been there when no one ever was. There's just such an intense bond for me, with listening and creating it. When I write I don't just think about lyrics, I can hear the chord progressions and melodies. Unfortunately I don't have enough experience with intstruments yet to share the finished product of my own music.
With 5SOS however, that connection was a lot different. I appreciate the artists always, though I never tend to feel anything more than that. I didn't feel that at all, I felt a boner. I'm kidding, I just really wanted to say that. Usually with musicians, since I am a fellow musican, I tend to idolize the ones who make music I enjoy. Yes, I know I'm stating the obvious. The thing is, after the whole initiation of binging keeks, interviews, funny moments, and the movie- I didn't once feel like they were above me in any way. Not even in a sexual dream enduced by falling asleep to Aerosmith. No, that wasn't too specific of a scenario.
They just made me feel understood in a way no one has. Not just because I'm so proud about being a gigantic dork. We were in the same boat, we had the same oar, we wanted to get to the same island that appearantly no one has heard of, we had the same belief that it exists, and the same thing about not being satisfyed with any of the millions of already existing islands. That was quite the metaphor, hehe. It's chalked down to similar situations, interests, humor, personalities, and impeccable music taste. It could also be that we are close in age, but then I'd be connected to millions of other people. That doesn't sound possible for me at the moment, but wait a couple years.
So I was chilling, laughing at Calcium crossing the border with his homie Mike, when I had the thought- What if I met them? In my mind, I thought there would be at least a year before they come to Illinois again, so I had time to save money. It became a goal for me, one I was quite sure would never happen. As we discussed, I'm an over achiever with all of my goals. So what did I do? Well it would be so easy to say I wrote each of them a letter. I can't do anything that simple, I'm far too creative for that simplicity.
From then to now, in almost a years time, so much happened from there. I met one of my closest friends who happens to be an Aussie; all because of a 5sos meme post, and her lack of ability to use Instagram properly. My family fell apart, and I'm not keen on going into detail. Let's just say I've gotten to consider the 5SOSFam as my only real family. I love you guys, you're a wonderful group of humans with a trail mix variety of nuts. Thank you for existing, and for reading this far.
Over the time I worked, I wrote and drafted maybe 500 different letters? As of late, I actually haven't gotten any letters finished. I made 4 bracelets, not a giant accomplishment. I'm 4/5 the way done with a poster I designed for Calcium. I made Lucas a fetus 5SOS wooden box, and a 5SOS money jar. I wrote Mikey a novel about him as a superhero, with a fan-art for it. That's kind of big actually cause I've never finished writing a longer story before. There's more things, but I don't want to get too technical with it.
I think I have to say the thing that I put most my effort in was a large journal for Ashton. That's because it's filled with art, tumblr posts, and lyrics. I'm a perfectionist when it comes to all of those things. At this point it has some holes because I've drafted the entire 100 or 200 pages over at least 8 different times. Nothing in it is original to the day I started, I made so many mistakes early 2017 for myself and that journal. I was working on the journal when I decided to attempt suicide for the second time.
It's completely crazy, but I've been through a lot with that journal. All of that started with the smallest idea. From the time I started to right now, I've changed so fucking much. I know how to handle my illness, I'm clean of self-harm, I lost a family and gained a new one, I failed at dying and learned how to live, I made an amazing friend, I got closer with my already existing amazing friend, I got a drum-kit, I somehow became a good lyricist, I found my music sound, my singing voice matured unbelievably, I got and lost pets, I got and lost relationships, I'm now in Uni, I'm more independent... I'm finally at the point where I can believe it does in fact get better.
That seems crazy given I've gone through more in 2017-2018 than I did when I came out about my depression, but maybe that's because I know how to spin it. I know how to handle life. Now everytime I'm scared to do something, I do it. Cause that is how you live, that's how you write, that's how you learn. I wouldn't recognize myself. I've gone from broken, bullied, and suicidal to seeing the beauty in my missing pieces, realizing I deserve better, and actually getting out of bed.
I think it might be because of the journal...
Hear me out, hear me out. I'm not saying it made me who I am, there's a difference between knowing and believing. Just like the difference between reading and comprehending. The difference between seeing and feeling. When I started that I could only talk the talk. Hell, when I started I had a case of putting them on a pedestal. It was never intentional, at the time I didn't even think I was worth anything. Now I see them as equals in most ways, cause when I see them be how they are I feel like I belong somewhere. I mean, I've always strayed from the majority just because I'd rather be myself and be disliked than be liked for being someone I'm not. I never saw the appeal in fitting in other than having someone to sit with at lunch. I didn't need to belong, even though it would have been nice to feel at home somewhere.
That's what I got when I found the dorks. I don't have to play a part to feel like I belong around them. I can be me, and still feel like I fit in. Not conformity, but genuine compatibility. Before them I was made fun of for being weird. I was made fun of for having my own style, for the song references no one understood, for how much I giggle. I was made fun of for my a many ambitious, none of which being realistic. But I still do all of these things. I still sing louder than everyone else. I still air drum and head bang to songs like Careless Whisper because it's really funny in contrast. I still play games, randomly balance objects on my head, dance in public because I don't give a shit about what people think when I'm having fun. 5SOS just helped me realize that girl who I wished I wasn't for most of my life, is actually the only person I'd ever want to be. Unless I could be Will Smith as Deadpool, then I immediately trash my last statement.
This is gonna get a bit heavy for a moment, but during that last attempt, as I was losing life I was legit thinking about them. How messed up is that? My life was so shitty my dying thoughts were about four idiots from Sydney. But that's how it was, they were my coping skill. I couldn't hold onto life for me after that, so I held on for them. Not because they'd know the difference if I was gone, let's be real, they wouldn't. If they knew of me then maybe, but I was so low on life's food chain at that point. I held onto the idea of making this epic stuff, and handing it to them.
I'm not even done with the journal!
I had a history of putting too much of myself into things and then being let down and loosing that part of me. So I don't do it, but it became something I did without realizing it. I don't know what I thought would happen. Maybe they'd like who I was, and would want to have a conversation. Maybe I'd be thrown into the fanfic life and get to hang out. Like a beach bonfire filled with laughter, various awesome people, classic rock, teasing, and knowing me, lots of dick jokes accompanying many innuendos. Maybe I'd end up in LA, and get signed to a rock label. I know I'm saying it like it's simple, trust me, I know all too well the effort it takes.
I gained some real maturity, and became even more well rounded. Though I was always the mature one who made a few mistakes here and there. That's one of the reasons I didn't fit in, I was like a 30 year old when I was 13. I'm not gonna say it wouldn't be cool to end up being their home diggle, but now I'm living for me. I saved myself, and they influenced me to. They leant me a helping hand. It would be epic to chill, or to collab on a song. Hell, if I got an opportunity to get signed to Hi or Hey I'd take it in a heartbeat. A small part of it is because I think the dorks are cool in their own odd way, but mostly because the company itself is an awesome fit for me. It produces the same sound I'd like to make, and it sends the same message-
#5sos one shot#5sos official#5sos quotes#5sos writing#5sos want you back#want you back#5sos 2018#5sos 2017#5sos roleplay#5sos rp#5sos edit#5sos gifs#5sos live#5sos video#5sos visuals#5sos tour#5sos twitter#5sos tweets#5sos texts#5sos cake#lashton#5sos au#5sos aesthetic#5sos drama#5sos fam#5sos fluff#5sos fanfic#5sos funny#5sos memes#5sos x reader
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full name. elijah ashton motta
date of birth. may 21
gender identity. cis male
orientations. bisexual, biromantic ( in the closet )
preferred pronouns. he/him
status. single
extracurriculars. football, swim team, baseball
+ traits. cocky, humorous, adventurous
- traits. aggressive, negative, stubborn
headcanons™
Elijah moved to the Lima area when he was ten. His mother had always been what he has now learned was a prostitute. She was very heavily hooked on drugs and had people coming and going in and out of the house at all hours. She was a single mother that basically didn’t want to be a mother in the first place. She knew who his father was but didn’t care to tell his father about him. When he was nine, Mr. Motta, the accused mobster, had put a hit out on some guy that owed him money. Turns out that guy was one of Eli’s mom’s clients. When his mother had “friends” over he was always asked by his mom to go play in the closet in the back bedroom and this time he did just as he was told. Except for this time his mother never came back to tell him he could come out for super or anything. He stayed there for a few days, unaware of the time and was greeted by cops searching the house that came across the little boy. His mother was murdered along with that other man because she was a witness that just so happened to have no one that would care if she was taken out as well. Well, Mr. Motta figured out about her having a son a few months later while watching the news and making sure no leads led back to him, and somehow felt bad about it. He decided to adopt the little boy and Elijah has no idea.
He doesn’t try to come off as negative in most situations, he tries to be as realistic as possible and just let people know that life sucks because it always has for him and that’s all he knows. He walks around with his family bought cars and money, not really caring who he offends, he can’t help that his family has money but that’s not the reason he’s a dick, he doesn’t care to show it off. He just doesn’t care if it offends you.
Appearance isn’t something he thinks too much on, it that doesn’t mean he doesn’t take a little extra time to make sure his short dark hair isn’t brushed just right and his outfit screams, are those dirty jeans? But he looks good doing it. He’s a slob, his room is far from organized and every week he has to do the walk of shame, carrying dishes from his room to the kitchen. He is almost always in some combat boots and has some cigarettes to fit right in his jacket pocket. He has a few tattoos on his upper right arm. Consisting of a huge shark attacking a pirate ship and another that is a sailors steering wheel. It may not seem like he cares but he cares about his aesthetic more than he lets on.
(happened this past football season) Anything he thinks of, he can give someone a million reasons how it could or already did up bad/wrong. Except football. Football was the one thing he was good at, the one thing that was going to get him a scholarship so he doesn’t have to use his families money, and out of Lima for good. He had been the top linebacker on the team since his Sophomore year and his position never wavered. He even filled in for the quarterback when something went wrong there, the team actually winning a few games when it happened. He has never been the type to keep his mouth shut and talking shit on the field one night is what cost him a shoulder injury. A torn rotator cuff, to be exact, the injury never fully healing. He went to the hospital once, got some painkillers and a doctors opinion about surgery but by the time it happened it was toward the end of the season and if he had surgery, he wouldn’t have been able to play baseball this season or fully play football his Senior year. As stubborn as he is and stuck in his ways, he didn’t take the doctors advice and suffered through the pain, not wanting any scouts to know he was injured. He started taking painkillers and buying them off of someone, to help his pain. Now he’s getting addicted to taking them everyday. He still contemplates having the surgery because trying to play third base on the baseball team is really taking a toll on his arm.
Most days he seems like the quiet mysterious type that always has something negative to say. He makes it his life mission to go against what every one is for, just to see what they will say to him. He doesn’t like when people tell him what to do and depending on who it is he will do the opposite just to mess with them.
Elijah loves porn, he loves sex more but his need to watch porn every day led him toward this next secret. He came across self-pleasing live videos of college girls who seemed to do whatever anyone in the chat room wanted. Which led to him hiring someone to set up his own website to do the same for whatever the audience chose to watch. He earns at least a thousand dollars a month from basically having sex with himself and chatting with people online.
Elijah isn’t quite sure how this next secret came along but all he knows is his current attraction is older woman and one of the families close friends got that ball rolling, one night at the fancy parties his parents make him attend. She’s in her thirties and somehow he texted her for his dad one day, which led to them casually texting every now and then. Which then led to him making that first step and they’ve been hooking up every now and then for the past two months.
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When We Collide (Part 30)
Pairing: Assistant!Y/N/CEO!Luke
Rating: NC-17
Masterlist: Here
Summary: He is the definition of high class smart ass, swimming in Dom Pierre Pérignon champagne and has never seen the shadow of poverty. She is underprivileged, lives in a messy dorm room on sale and struggles working as an assistant after being thrown out of college. But how will they collide when Luke makes Y/N pregnant after a drunkenly one night stand
When We Collide on Wattpad
“Someone is looking delightfully morning fresh.”
Looking up tiredly from the half-finished bowl of oatmeal you blinked twice to get away the blurriness. Safe to say you were really tired this morning and it was showing on your face.
“Morning smirkyface.” You commented back and rolled your eyes when Luke added up to his nickname by having the brightest smirk on his face.
He walked past you to get to the fridge, opened it and searched around for whatever breakfast would please his hungry senses.
“So what are you up for today?” He asked causally and found milk and some eggs for him to cook on a pan.
“Dying.” You explained carefully and looked over your shoulder to watch his reaction.
“I’ve been sleepless all night trying to get through it without waking up. I’ve had these weird nightmares that come and go I don’t know what is going on but they keep affecting me and disturb my sleep. And it doesn’t help with my back because I’ve been sleeping like a mess and I don’t understand how you can have such shoulder pain.”
“Want me to hire you a masseuse? Baan Sukchoke Ban Pornpis is fantastic with his hands.” He asked and stopped in track to look at you.
“You’re crazy.” You laughed quietly and shook your head in disbelief.
It was weird how mornings like this had turned into something special.
The last couple of days you had stayed at Luke’s place. In fact you had been here since staying over for Christmas. It was easier to live here, it was closer to work if it was the case of you showing up and you also had someone to talk to all the time.
It wasn’t even something that was decided in the first place. You had just stayed here because Luke hadn’t said anything so.
You could actually tell from the way he was he was enjoying your presence. He wasn’t being cocky, he didn’t have an attitude all the time you generally enjoyed each other’s presence.
You had considered moving out but it was only because you had been staying here for five days and you weren’t sure if he was feeling annoyed by it or not.
“Have you noticed it’s been five days?” You asked and he furrowed his eyebrows as to what you meant.
“I mean, five days without ripping out each other’s throats.”
By your words he chuckled lightly and looked down at his feet. He took the small walk around the kitchen counter to stand behind you it made you look over your shoulder.
“I don’t want to throw shade or anything but I think we both know why.”
You folded your lips together by his words and nodded your head in agreement but the both of you knew very well that the source of constant drama and fights came from a little barbie called Holly.
Grabbing your spoon again you were about to take another bite of your oatmeal when you felt his hands carefully.
“Where is it sore?” He asked carefully and you felt goosebumps appear on your arms by his soft fingers on your bare skin around the shoulder.
“What are you doing?” You asked back with hint of confusion.
“Simply just showing that sometimes I can take action into my own without having to hire something to do my work.”
You became silent by his words and felt his fingers start to work. Safe to say you felt it a bit weird at first and you didn’t know what to say because just the thought of him doing this on his own left you stunned.
He had been the last couple of days. It was like he had changed into another guy.
Sometimes he still was the same and used the money for help but it wasn’t in the benefit of impressing you. It was just because that was how he usually did his work and he also couldn’t just leave out Patrick for the help.
But it was everything else that seemed to be changed. He didn’t often have help for breakfast, lunch and dinner more, it was more just the two of you doing it.
He didn’t need the help of having someone to drive him around all the time. It also made sense because when you first had gotten to know him he drove his car by himself but now he was doing the same.
Sometimes you would stare at him with wide eyes because he was being like this. It was kind of weird but at the same time you really liked and enjoyed this side of him. It was the one you had fallen for in the first place if it wasn’t for Holly changing everything.
“Is it helping?” He asked and you nodded your head agreeing.
“It’s nice. I don’t understand how it gets this sore but I think it’s because I’m carrying around heavy weird. I just don’t want to think about it getting any worse.” You mumbled carefully and fiddled with your fingers.
“Oh trust me I could do this all the time. I actually took a few classes at some fancy camp when I was younger. It was a part of the program to learn how to get each other massages.”
“You used to go to summer camp?” You asked and looked over your shoulder with an unconvinced but amused look.
“Don’t look at me like that.” He laughed and moved your hair away to massage your neck.
“Is it that big of a surprise?”
“Luke Hemmings, living in a camp house made out of old beds and wood? Or even a tent if it was that kind of thing? It’s not that I’m surprised I just think it’s really hard to believe.” You laughed quietly and placed the spoon in your now finished bowl.
“Well okay maybe we didn’t stay in tents and all but we were living in those camp houses! But they weren’t you know like really bad we had king sized beds and everything...” He stopped in track when he realized where it was going and you quivered an eyebrow.
“But in fact we learned a lot of about being independent and such! We washed out own clothes and we also helped out in the canteen to make breakfast and such. Don’t say I’m totally helpless I can thank Mrs. Logan for that!”
“So that’s the reason why you don’t wash your own clothes now? It was such a disaster back then?” You knew you were being a tease and he stopped in track from massaging you.
“Really?” He asked, his eyebrows lifting so high they could almost touch his hairline.
“I’m only kidding.” You smiled and nudged your shoulder against his chest because of him being so high and you sitting on one of the bar chairs.
“Well a small bird told me last time you washed your clothes you ended up making everything light pink.” He hummed almost secretly and your eyes widened.
“Patrick told me he wouldn’t tell you about the bra that was completely red.” You looked up with a pale face, you really did think he would keep it as a secret but of course he didn’t.
“You know just because Patrick is my butler and personal helper doesn’t mean he doesn’t tell me anything. We talk gossip and such when we feel like it. Including you trying to be all independent and wash your white clothes with a freaking red bra.”
“That was one time and it didn’t happen again! I mean, how did I know the red bra was suddenly there if I knew it was in the pile of my clothes I wouldn’t have washed it with white in the first place.”
“Of course you have to say that.” He laughed and let go of your shoulders to look at you and hover over the kitchen counter next to you.
“Yes because it’s true!” You argued and crossed your arms, “It’s better than you Mr. I think I know everything but I don’t. Patrick told me you tried to vacuum here the other day but you didn’t even know how the hell to turn on the machine!”
“I’ve never touched a vacuum cleaner before what do you expect from me?” He said with a loud tone but it was all for the fun. You were both on the edge of cracking up.
“How can you never have touched a vacuum cleaner before?” You laughed and shook your head in disbelief.
“Well at least I touched one now.” He argued and you nodded your head in agreement fake impressed.
Safe to say you were in fact shocked when you saw him stand with the vacuum cleaner. It had looked like he had control of everything and he walked around like he had done this all the time.
But when Patrick came over to tell you the truth behind the story you had laughed so hard you almost gagged on your salvia.
He smiled carefully and headed over to the couch to grab his blazer. It was enough that he had changed a bit of his attitude but he still wore his clothes as fancy as he possibly could.
“So what is happening today?” He asked casually and you were about to answer when your phone called.
Your eyes widened in surprise when you saw Ashton’s name flash on the screen. It had been a while since you had heard anything from him besides simple texts here and there over Imessage.
“Sorry I’ll just answer this.” You mumbled and stood up from the bar chair to go away in a little more peace.
“Hey Ashton.” You said after stopping the phone from ringing and lifted it up to your phone.
“Hey Y/N. Nice to hear your voice!” He responded back and immediately you could hear something was up. “You too.”
“Okay so I’m gonna cut to the deal already. I know you’re probably suffering through living with Luke and all but I promise I will come home soon after New Year’s Eve. There’s just this tini tiny little problem we have.”
“What’s up?” You asked with a hint of confusion and by the mention of Luke you looked over at him.
He was hovering over the sink doing the dishes and you had to hold everything in trying not to laugh. He was standing with your oatmeal trying to clean up the bowl and watching him stand with the dish washer brush was probably one of the funniest things to date.
“I’m having my brother and sister coming over for visit. As they live in Sydney they’re on what we could consider Winter/actual Summer holiday and they really wanted to see New York to see where I am currently living and how life is. And since I don’t want to cause trouble and I definitely don’t think they’re old enough to have their old hotel I think it would be the best if they stayed at my apartment. And I know it’s not optional with the lack of space but I was just wondering if you could find somewhere else to live just for the weeks. If it’s too much trouble I don’t want to push you into it I just really want my siblings to have a nice time.”
“No no it’s fine I understand.” You mumbled, in fact you felt fine with it.
“I know where to live.” You sighed and looked over at Luke again to see him stand with a washing cloth and cleaning the bowl. He seemed pretty impressed by his own cleaning skills.
“Ah that is so great to hear! I hope you will have the best New Year’s Eve possible. I’m sending all my greetings from Sydney!”
“I’m sending it all back to you.” You smiled softly and fiddled with the hem of your shirt.
He said a few things more before hanging up completely and you stood for a moment trying to register what had just happened.
“See! And you say I don’t know how to do the dishes!” He exclaimed loudly and showed the spoon he had just cleaned but with such force it flied towards the floor with a loud bang.
“Yeah, I’m impressed.” You nodded your head in agreement and went back to the kitchen counter.
“So... What’s up with him? Why is he turned on by pregnant women?”
“Luke!” You were quick to scold at him but you could also tell he was being serious with what he was saying.
“No I’m serious!” He spoke up and leaned down to grab the spoon from the floor.
“What’s up with you two?”
“I’m not sure what you mean?” You said through gritted teeth and crossed your arms. You didn’t understand the way he was reacting because there was no reason for it. Especially not that comment of his.
“Oh don’t give me that.” He spat and placed the spoon in one of the drawers.
“You’re living with him, you spend awfully lot of time together not to mention you go to the scanning with him!”
“Wait, how do you know that?” You asked and tightened your arms around your chest.
“Because believe it or not Y/N I went to the scanning. I showed up after seeing the appointment in your calendar because I wanted to be a part of it but once I saw you two happily together I thought I could just leave! And that makes me question, yes I’m respectful towards you but am I respectful enough towards my daughter to not even have the guts to walk in and see her flashing on a screen!”
Your eyes grew twice its size by his words. You had not expected this at all, far from it. You didn’t believe he wanted to show up in the first place and because of being angry with him it was easier to just bring Ashton.
“We’re just friends Luke! That’s it!”
“Yes but I don’t want him to take over my role!” He argued back.
“That’s what this is all about? Because you’re afraid? No matter what Luke he can never take over your role. Never. Even if I just want to hate you I can’t because I know that you will always be a part of my life! You’re a part of her life!”
You loosened your arms and let your fingers run through your hair. It was like the mood had changed completely and you both became silent after your words.
“If you feel so disturbed by having him around me all the time why do you allow it?” You asked and he furrowed his eyebrows not understanding what you were getting at.
“Why don’t you fire him if he’s bothering you that much? I mean, you have the chance to do so.”
By the question Luke’s face changed and he placed his hands down into his jean pockets. He was having his eyebrows furrowed and you could tell he was in thought whether to answer or not.
"Because I know he will be the only one to protect you 100% with his life. I don’t want to risk anything.”
“Wh-, What?” You questioned astounded and looked at him with lifted eyebrows and wide eyes.
He ran a hand through his hair nervously, you had never seen him like this. You didn’t understand what was going on, it was clear on your face. He needed to explain and it had to be now.
“What do you mean by that? Wasn’t he hired to protect your diamonds?” You finally managed to say something and he opened his mouth nervously.
You were always in belief that it was the reason. Ashton had showed up at the same time as Luke had ordered the diamonds, it was the main reason why you were in belief that he was hired to take extra care of that.
“No he was hired to protect you.”
Silence fell upon the room in such a way you felt like you weren’t there. Hearing him admitting that was something you had never expected of him to do.
“Since you became pregnant the thought of something happening to you tore me down. That’s why I hired Ashton. To take care of you as much as he possibly could, to make sure that no matter what nothing would harm you in any way.”
“I uh-, I don’t know what to say.” You admitted after a full minute of just taking his words in and realizing everything.
It somehow made sense and somehow not. But what amazed you the most was the fact that Luke constantly walked around in fear of Ashton replacing his role, yet still stayed put with having Ashton as the bodyguard.
Or more likely, only yours.
“I’m not forcing you to say anything.” He responded back half silent, he seemed pretty stunned by his words too.
You nodded your head in agreement because it was true. You didn’t need to say anything and sometimes words didn’t express fully how you were feeling inside.
Taking the small steps that separated you, you were quick to wrap your arms around his waist.
The bump was in the way and it was kind of messy considering where you were standing but once you were in his reach he didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around your shoulders.
He was warm and everything you needed just now. It was close to be the best hug you had ever shared together because it held so much more than just the simply friendly state.
The way he was rubbing his hands up and down was soothing and comforting and the way you were pressing your face closer to his chest just to hear his heartbeat skip a beat or two was a little special moment you would remember for the rest of your life.
To add up with everything a little kick in your stomach turned out to be something special. Luke could feel it as well being pressed against yours and the amazing smile on his face seemed to be worth everything.
“I know what we’re gonna do today.” You announced when you finally pulled away and he looked at you curiously.
“We’re gonna do something different.”
You knew that Luke was never fond of your ideas, in fact some of them were pretty ridiculous but today you thought it had to be different.
If you had to work today it also meant sharing a bit of each other and learning each other’s personality and challenges. It meant, that the both of you would go out and combine each other’s minds to change someone’s life even if it was just for a moment or a day.
It meant that once you were out of the apartment you explained the idea to him. Wanting to go out to the poor, help them out with some proper New Year’s Eve garnish and decorations to help them out even if they were living on the street.
It was like the both of you had gotten a chance to see a different point of view because you knew how it felt not being able to afford anything in your old dorm.
And since Luke somehow had to realize that he could still invest his money in a possible way without buying people’s acceptance you explained to him how he could cheer someone up with something so simple.
You had expected him to be more skeptical about your decision but he wasn’t. He was following you around and letting you talk with this warm smile on his face.
He didn’t question you about anything, heck he even laughed by the reaction the woman behind the cashier had when you showed up with all the New Year’s Eve decorations that could possibly be bought in the supermarket. The trolley was completely filled to the top.
You were so excited about this it was like you had forgotten all the pain in your shoulders and the back. The bump wasn’t an issue either and being fully packed up in warm clothes you had fun walking around and also sharing blankets to the ones freezing.
Some were staring that was for sure. Normally, it would have been more proper to give out Christmas presents and share lovely Christmas dinner for the poor but you really wanted to stand out for something different.
This was much fun, to see their reaction and let them understand they were never actually forgotten.
And it was kind of confusion you could imagine. A millionaire showing up in fancy clothes with his almost 6 month pregnant assistant and a bag filled with decorations to hang up. It was one hell of a sight.
“Is this completely normal?” Luke asked after returning yet another decoration to a woman sitting on a bench with a bunch of pigeons.
“No it’s not.” You laughed and leaned down to grab one of the bright golden garlands to hang it over his shoulders.
“Well don’t forget your hat then.” He commented and took your beanie off to replace it with one of the golden New Year’s Eve hats you had also invested money in buying.
Some were even having a huge laugh when they walked past you in the garden. But it was most probably also because you had actually stolen the trolley from the supermarket because it was too heavy to carry on your own.
You continued to walk for at least an hour more. You didn’t care where you were going you just walked around and actually spread the decorations with whoever pleased or even the ones who looked oddly at you.
“If this goes in the news they’re gonna think what the hell.” He commented after noticing that the trolley was almost empty. It was almost time to head back to place the stolen trolley and head home.
“No they’re gonna think what a nice gesture.” You smiled and suddenly your face brightened up.
“No wait we’re missing someone!” You exclaimed after noticing there was only stuff for one last person in the trolley.
“You know a tramp?” He asked a little bit surprised but didn’t get to ask more as you dragged the front of the trolley to make him follow you towards your direction.
The question seemed to answer itself when you walked an alley where dumpsters were collected together just like the last time you had been here.
“Henry!” You hammered twice on the dumpster next to you in hope of getting his attention and see if he was in fact home.
It wasn’t until you knocked down one of the trashcans that he rose up from the death, his eyes wide just like the last time you had seen him and he was quick to point at you.
“Newspaper stealer! Are you here to invade my home again?”
You laughed by how quickly he was to recognize you and hurried towards him.
He was pretty confused when you spread golden garlands over his dumpsters and placed a large New Year’s Eve hat on the top of his head.
“Just making it special for the occasion. Have a nice evening.” You laughed and hurried back to Luke before he could get the chance to say anything, pushing him away with the trolley.
“Who the hell was that?” He asked fully confused and you laughed so loudly you could feel cramps in the stomach.
“Just some random guy I met once. Very protective of his newspaper.” You laughed and in one swift movement landed in the trolley so Luke could drive you around instead of walking.
“Well I hope we just made his New Year’s Eve ten times better than he possibly could achieve on his own.”
#in celebration of MY BABYS BIRTHDAY#MY IDOL#THE MAIN CHARACTER OF MY BEST STORIES#luke <33#5sos#5sos imagine#5sos imagines#5sos preference#5sos preferences#5sos fanfiction#5sos fanfictions#5sos blurb#5sos blurbs#5sos au#5sos aus#5sos writing#5sos writings#5sos smut#5sos smuts#5sos scenario#5sos scenarios#5sos when we collide#ceo!5sos#ceo!luke#when we collide#5 seconds of summer#5 seconds of summer preferences#5 seconds of summer preference#5 seconds of summer imagine#5 seconds of summer imagines
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Brushwork || ArtMajor!Calum AU (Chapter 17)
Summary: An Art Major AU where Dallas - third year gawky art student at VCA - makes a deal with Calum - her cute new neighbour and project partner - and they spend the entire year learning that the perfect masterpiece takes a whole lot of brushwork.
Date: 18 September 2017
Requested: not really no lmaoooo
Pairing: Calum + Dallas
Words: 3.3K
Warnings: some tense friendships here. Mali makes another appearance. Um. Yeah, i think that’s it.
A/N: This is not really up to a great standard, but I think I did well for someone with writer’s block! Please let me know what you think, I love getting all kinds of feedback! Big Love xo
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Chapter 17: ‘Yeah, You’re Right, You Should Probably Neck Yourself Now To Save Yourself The Humiliation’
I’d only moved about two feet to the right in my painting progress all fucking morning. It was 3 in the afternoon and we were on a late coffee/lunch break and Calum was trying his best to assure me that we were making good time and that we’d actually been super productive. But the paint on his neck and face and on my arms and nose said otherwise (there were a few minutes somewhere near 12 o’clock where we were tired and distracted and looking desperately for something to paint other than this damn wall and that stupid, faceless ballerina).
“Dallas, you need to just fucking chill, okay?” He said for what felt like – and I hoped it would be – the final time. He wasn’t really reassuring me anymore, in fact he looked almost frustrated as he rolled his eyes at me. I scowled at him over a milkshake that we were sharing. “We’re going to finish on time.”
“Fuck you.” I pouted. “Don’t swear at me.” Calum chuckled, eyes wild and fake-offended as he snatched the chocolate shake from my side of the table and sucking on the straw.
“Alright then, no more milkshake for you then.” He teased and I just offered a sidelong expression.
“Whatever.” I shot at him. “I didn’t ask for it to start with.”
“You literally paid for it.”
“… that’s not the point.”
“You’re a dick.”
And the conversation – if you could call it that – went on like that until we’d arrived back at the wall with a fresh shake that Calum paid for this time. It was strawberry and the pink colour looked like it belonged in a sex novel, the way Calum kept licking the residue off of his lips. I purposefully stopped looking at him after the third or fourth time because every time I watched him I would blush.
“What do you reckon?” I asked him through an almost defeated sigh. We stood about 6 feet away from the wall, side by side, and staring at our unfinished work. “How much longer do you think we need?” Calum hmmm’ed and ha’ed next to me for a moment, his face contorting to match his thoughts. To me it looked like this piece was never going to be finished. The dancer still had no face, her hair had no colour, the middle section was still predominantly only outlines – it was going to take a miracle for us to finish this on time.
“I think we can do it.” Calum said confidently. “If we both work on the background now we could be done in another couple of hours. The tutu detailing… is going to take another day or two, probably. But I can skip a couple lectures to get it done. I think.” He didn’t sound as convinced as I wanted him to be about this, but I took whatever I could get.
“Alright.” I looked at Calum and he offered me the milkshake. I was tempted to just take a sip as he held it to me, but I had this premonition of that ending in my choking on the straw and projectile vomiting all over the poor kid. I shuddered at the thought and just took the plastic cup like a normal person. “I’m going to kill myself by the end of this, but alright.” Calum rolled his eyes at me through a chuckle again.
“Such a flair for the dramatic.” He laughed. “Come on, I’ll do the bottom this time.” He started to head toward the wall and I shook my head as I followed behind.
“Uh, no.” I disagreed. “No, if I go up on the ladder I’ll die.”
“For fuck’s sake!” Calum practically wailed, his laugh musical and not at all offensive – though it probably should have been. “Is there anything in this world that won’t end in your untimely death?!” He looked at me over his shoulder and his brown eyes were swimming with tease but also bewilderment.
“No.” I deadpanned, face straight and completely serious. Calum eyes rolled one more time and I let myself smile just a little as he wandered over to his palette that he’d abandoned at the base of the wall, reapplying the paint with a little grin of his own.
I felt like I was in some sort of trance or a dream – this was all too surreal to be true. The most unbelievable fact was that Calum, by some miracle, wasn’t sick of me yet. This whole semester I had been waiting for him to realise how bat-shit crazy I was and head for the hills. But it hadn’t happened and I had the feeling that I was never going to get over that.
Around 20 minutes into the new painting session, a low whistle coming from right behind Calum and I pulled us out of our focus. Both of us spun around to see who was commenting on our unfinished piece of shit and to both of our surprise, it was my sister.
“Looking good, nerds.” She said with a relatively impressed grin, arms folded across her chest and her head tilted to the left as she continued to somewhat objectify our mural.
“How are we the nerds?” Calum said first. “Aren’t you in law school?” Belle replied with a wave of her hand and a cheeky smile that made Calum giggle and turn back to the wall.
“What’s up?” I took to asking, squinting a little bit in the afternoon light that was reflecting around the atrium.
As I gazed up at my sister – not for the first time in my life – I saw that she looked relatively dressed up. Black skinny jeans that weren’t ripped (actually, looking them, they were probably mine), tight fitting grey v-neck tee and her hair, as always, pulled back into its un-messy messy bun and large hoop earrings (that I was pretty sure she’d stolen from Polly eons ago) dangling from her ears. She’d done her makeup natural, but on point, and I could tell by the way that she’d stolen my good handbag and clung onto it for dear life, that she’d just been out.
“Where were you?” I cocked an eyebrow at my sister, curious. Part of the reason she rarely came to visit me at school was for the lack of things for her to do here. I wanted to know what she’d found to entertain her enough that she wanted to dress up for it.
“Oh,” She shrugged but offered a small, secret smile I think was only meant for herself. “I had lunch with Ashton.” I blinked back my surprise.
“Jesus.” I mumbled. “How did that go? Did you rip him a new one?” Belle rolled her eyes, shifting her weight from one foot to the other as she shook her head at me.
“No.” She said pointedly. “We just… talked. Cleared the air.”
“I didn’t realise the air between you guys needed cleaning.” Calum commented – although I didn’t think he meant to on purpose because when I looked up at him on the ladder I could see a faint blush in his cheeks. But Belle shrugged anyway with a small, content sigh.
“It did, and now it is, and I think we’ll be okay now.” She said with a small nod and I smiled up at her gently.
“That’s awesome, B.” I told her.
“Yeah.” She said, and dare I say it, she was almost back to normal. “Yeah, we’re going to go out for dinner tomorrow night so it should be like old times.” She smiled pretty wide again and while my heart was bursting and I was happy that my sister was finally feeling better, I couldn’t help the hesitation and slight fear for her too.
“Oh.” I stammered a little under my breath trying to find my footing and the right words to say that wouldn’t offend anyone. “That’s, um. Yeah cool. Did you… I mean, did you tell Polly yet?” I could feel Calum looking down on me with that curious eye, wandering about my motives – and quite honestly, I was wandering about my motives too. All I knew was that Polly’s heart would break if she knew that my sister was going on a date with the boy she was borderline in love with, but also that Belle would never intentionally hurt Polly that way. I just wanted them both to be okay.
“Eh, it’s fine.” Belle waved her hand again, her demeanour stiffening a little bit but her tone jumping a couple of octaves. “She’s fine.”
“Fair enough…” I mumbled out. “Are you headed off now?” My sister nodded and she come over to kiss my cheek quickly before she turned on her heel and quickly sped off with my jeans and my handbag.
“That was weird.” Calum commented. I just nodded, staring after my sister with a small frown.
“Always is with her.” I muttered, turning back to my palette and brush.
X
I was starting to notice that Mali took longer to answer the phone than any normal human did. I wasn’t overly bothered by it – phone calls tended to give me extreme anxiety, so the longer I could put them off the better. But Calum’s sister was on some other wavelength where messaging or texting just wasn’t an option. I would text her to ask a really quick question and then all of a sudden, she was calling me 5 seconds later to answer and then I would hang up at 1 in the morning after talking about the role of push-up bras in the Twilight series for a couple hours. Seriously. That actually happened. It was weird.
I threw myself back onto the sofa, legs dangling off of the arm rest as I stared up at the ceiling, my heart kind of doing flip turns in my chest because Mali had just finished rattling off some of the things that Calum had said to her in the past 24 hours. That’s why she told me to call her – Calum had told her that he was super nervous about our date.
“Honestly, I feel like I should be more nervous than him.” I confessed. “I am more nervous than him.”
“You don’t know that.” She said very matter-of-factly. I could almost picture the dead-eyed look she would shoot me with if she was here.
“I do know that,” I fired back. “Because it’s true. I’m going to shit myself, I know it. I’m terrified.”
“What for?!” She yelled into the phone. “You told him yourself, there’s nothing to be scared about.”
“Actually,” I began my correction. “I told him there was nothing to be nervous about, I didn’t say anything about being scared. Secondly, I lied.”
“Thirdly, you’re an idiot.” Mali interjected and I could hear the frustration oozing from her voice the same way Calum’s did. “Seriously, don’t you ever get sick of being so… paranoid?”
“I’m not paranoid.” I pouted.
“Oh, whatever, you are so.” She chuckled. “DJ, if Calum didn’t like you already he wouldn’t have asked you out.” I sighed, eyes closed as I tried to let Mali’s pep talk work its magic.
“I know.” I said quietly. “I just… I really don’t want to fuck this up. I fuck up pretty much everything else in my life so it would be a nice break if this was the one thing I don’t ruin.”
“Don’t worry.” Mali was almost begging me now. “Just be yourself and you’ll be fine.” I scoffed, but I didn’t interrupt. “I can honestly tell you that even though Calum is just as nervous as you, he really likes you and he’s excited. He really likes spending time with you.”
I couldn’t help the little smile on my lips when Mali said that. And I didn’t blush either, so I guess that was a big step for me.
“I know.” I ended up saying carefully. “He told me.”
“Well, there you go!” Mali said cheerfully. “He’s confident when he’s with you, and I haven’t seen him like this in a long time. You’re going to be okay.”
Weirdly enough, I felt better. I never expect to when I confide in my friends about my problems – which is dumb, I know, but it’s like every time I go in to these conversations completely expecting the other person to tell me, ‘yeah, you’re right, you should probably neck yourself now to save yourself the humiliation’ it feels just that little bit better when they don’t.
I sat up with a jolt as I heard the front door being unlocked. It was Polly, obviously, and it made my heart race for a whole new reason because for some reason I felt like she was about to walk in on me doing something illegal or dirty. According to her version of the Friendship Agreement, talking to Mali about my boy problems probably was illegal and dirty. Did I have time to do anything about it, though? No. Because Polly had this amazing talent of barging into any room she ever entered.
“Hey, I brought – oh, sorry.” I watched with secret panic as Polly, in all of her beauty and grace, dumped a bunch of plastic bags from Riot! on the floor in front of the kitchen counter and a Pizza Hut box on top.
“I gotta go.” I said quickly into the phone, not waiting for Mali to say ‘goodbye’ before I hung up. I would call her back later to explain – or, at least, I would text her saying that I would call her back to explain and then not do it. I offered a tight-lipped and hopefully non-suspicious smile to Polly who just looked at me kind of awkwardly.
“Uh, hey.” I said as cheerfully as I could muster.
“Sup…” She drawled out slowly. “Who were you talking to?” For a split second, she narrowed her eyes at me as if she knew my dark secret – not that I’d been overly secretive about my ability to make a new friend that I actually liked or anything. But Polly’s dagger eyes didn’t last long anyway, so I just cleared my throat a little bit and decided that maybe this wouldn’t go disastrously wrong if I told Polly the truth.
“Oh, um.” I coughed one more time. “That was Mali.”
“That’s Calum’s sister, right?” Polly’s eyebrow rose gently and I just gave a small, slow nod.
“Yeah, um.” I gave a soft chuckle. “I wanted to, like. Talk to her. About Calum.” Polly just stared at me a little blankly for a moment or two, and it was a little frightening because I couldn’t for the life of me tell what she was thinking. Usually I could pick up on however Polly was feeling based on a single twitch of her nose but something was different this time. Her eyebrows furrowed together ever-so-slightly and the corners of her mouth turned down just a fraction, but it was like there was so much going on in her head that I couldn’t read her eyes anymore. I’d never felt this way about Polly before. It was off.
“You talk to her about Calum?” She asked, finally breaking the silence. I gulped, her quiet and hesitant reaction not exactly what I was expecting.
“Yeah.” I said again. “She and I… I dunno, it’s just…?” I frowned, because I was starting to feel like Polly was after a specific explanation but I couldn’t really figure out what that was or if I could even give that to her. Polly frowned too. I gulped again.
“I thought…” Polly gave a seemingly frustrated sigh as she cut her sentence short, walking into the kitchenette and switching on the kettle.
“What?” I asked, standing up from the couch and wandering around the other side, leaning against the back. Polly shook her head, taking another moment to exhale kind of loudly and shake her head while she chose her words.
“I just… I thought we were going to start telling each other stuff.” She finally spat out, not really looking at me and just focussing on making herself a coffee. “I thought…” She took another breath and there was a moment where I was actually scared I’d hurt her feelings.
“What?” I prompted her gently, not liking the way she kept speaking in half-sentences. The taller girl let out the breath she’d been keeping in and finally looked at me, her eyes less clouded this time – which slowed my heart rate significantly, thank God.
“I just don’t know why you keep not talking to me about your love life.” She said, and I was pretty sure I saw a tiny small twitch on her lips but something in my gut was telling me my brain was tricking me into seeing what I wanted to see. “I’ve been invested in this since day one, remember?”
I gave a tiny chuckle, scratching the back of my neck sheepishly but shrugging at the same time.
“I know, it’s just –!” I couldn’t stop the chuckling, and that was probably bad because this felt like a relatively serious conversation. “Mali has different intel than you! She’s his sister. And he tells her everything, so I just… I wanted to know stuff Calum wouldn’t have told you.”
Polly rolled her eyes but managed to force out a small laugh.
“You underestimate my relationship with Calum, you know?” She said and I smiled, rolling my eyes too as I crossed my arms over my chest. “How’s B?” She changed the subject and I blinked again, because I didn’t realise she knew that Belle had been here.
“Oh, yeah, she’s… Well, she’s B. She was a bit upset, but she was pretty good when she left this afternoon.”
“Everything okay?”
“Yeah, yeah. Dad’s anniversary is coming up and she just needed someone to talk to.”
“Fair enough.”
“She made peace with Ashton, too, which is good.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah, they’re going to dinner tomorrow night.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah.”
Polly was being weirdly quiet and her sentences were tapering off again. It was weird, and the sudden tension in the room and… animosity rolling off of her shoulders towards me; well, needless to say, it was freaking me out a little bit.
“Pol?” I paused to let her decide if she was going to answer me.
“Mm?” She hummed, and I could feel the wall she was putting up as she abandoned the coffee she was making and started gathering her things from her handbag.
“Does my sister going out with Ashton bother you?” I asked carefully, watching as Polly froze, eyes glazing over. She looked like she was shutting down, and it scared me because she’d never done that before and I had no idea why she was doing it now.
“No.” She smiled at me, but it didn’t reach her eyes – in fact it was icy, the kind of smile that held sarcasm and annoyance behind it. “No, it’s um. It’s cool, I’m happy for them.”
“Are you sure?” I prodded, grimacing because this whole conversation felt the way as the one we had years ago before she punched me and broke my nose. “You just seem so… off?” Polly just shook her head.
“Don’t worry, I’m fine.” She said quickly, like she was saying it just to shut me up and moved on. It stung. And I was annoyed and confused because she was icing me out, and while it had happened once or twice it was never like this and never lasted this long. “I’m gonna go see Ash. Don’t wait up.”
And with that, she left, hot pizza still on the counter and her shopping bags still all over the floor. I was left standing there feeling like an idiot.
#brushwork#mine#calum hood#5sos#5 seconds of summer#calum hood au#5sos au#5 seconds of summer au#calum hood imagine#5sos imagine#5 seconds of summer imagine#calum hood fic#5sos fic#5 seconds of summer fic#calum hood fanfiction#5sos fanfiction#5 seconds of summer fanfiction#calum hood fanfic#5sos fanfic#5 seconds of summer fanfic#college 5sos#college calum hood#college 5sos au#fanfiction#fanfic#fic#writing#novel#story
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W H A T ! okay i'm completely calm. that's a lie i'm hyperventilating over the possibility of another chapter for the train buddies au 😅 and i mean english is just very easy to learn i think 😅 not everything obviously but it's kinda easy to pick up.. french is just hard. (learned it in school too but can barely manage small talk now bc the grammar is fucked up and i keep forgetting the vocabulary though for some reason i can still read it relatively well) (1/4)
(2/4) yeah no i'll stay far away from the english version i really can't imagine it would be a nice experience 😅 especially since i'd try to sing along and then would just be disappointed by it being different 🙈 ooh i remember that song and i just sat here for 5 minutes saying vierzig to figure out how i say it normally and i think i actually pronounce it like he does but that also makes sense i guess since he's apparently from berlin as well 😅
(3/4) also proving your point now i haven't even heard of deutschland 83 but i also don't watch any german tv shows bc they make me cringe (except for charite which is very very good) & me reading this: deutschland eighty-three. i feel you i didn't even realise i read it in a weird language mix until i saw your tags 😅
(4/4) yeeees god they are made for a wilde kerle au, aren't they? even ashton fits perfectly i'm in awe 🙈 & i completely support you in spoiling the show! you go and live your stress free life!! & about the britpop au: well jokes on you you will have to deal with me writing essays about songs für liam in your ao3 comments and like ignoring the actual story if you put in more references 🤷♀️ okay no i have to say the 1. chapter is really really good and i can't wait for the rest!! -spoiler twin
SKJDNFKSJD i mean we’ll have to see what happens once britpop au is done i’m DETERMINED to finish this get it out fo my system and all and then i can go wherever inspriation takes me which hopefully will be soulmate au and train buddies au . lets see if i can finish some fics ALSO thats wild english is actually quite a hard language imo because of all the irregularities and tenses and stuff? like my mums lived in the uk for 25 years speaks almost perfect english but still can’t tell the difference between i go and i’m going she’ll constantly be like i get out of the swimming pool now. because obviously in german theres no present continuous
omg DO YOU i literally love vierzig pronounced as fürzig but surely you dont say für for vier? i dont even know what accent i have in german but i definitely say vier as vier not für so i love hearing it pronounced like that idk why but it sounds so nice i actually really love the sound of german i know loads of people think its a really harsh language but i really like it what i think is interesting is that your voice is higher in german than it is in english idk why but its really interesting to me
you should wathc it if you have the time/are interested in the east/west divide in the 80s its SO GOOD god i love it so much also i watched all of charité WHAT a show honestly seriously good tv but i agree i dont watch much german tv which is sad :( di watch some banging german films last year though and my parents still love tatort which i will watch from time to time but it doesnt hit like csi </3
EXACTLY maybe i will have to dabble...maybe...finally put all my football knowledge to good use...NKSDFJNSKJDF PLEASE i’m literally going to add like 30 lines about noel writing the songs for liam just for you <3 true kindness <3 i’m so glad you liked it honestly that means so much to me thank you so so much!!
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The Logical Rose-ning Section: Your Recap of The Bachelorette
Rachel Lindsay is a practicing attorney who once took the LSAT. And you, dear reader, are an aspiring attorney who will soon take the LSAT. Rachel Lindsay is also an aspiring married person, serving as the bachelorette on this season of The Bachelorette, the love story these depraved times deserve. And you, dear reader, may also be an aspiring married person? Either way, you definitely have at least a few things in common with Rachel. So every Tuesday, we’re going to be tracking Rachel’s romantic journey on The Bachelorette, and see what we can learn about love, loss, and the LSAT. Welcome to the Logical Rose-ning Section.
We pick up in the Bachelorette Man-sion, with our dudes still reeling from last week’s premiere episode. And so are we, frankly. I mean, so many mans, so many potential futures for Rachel. We get a little recap of the first night’s action with Chris Harrison. Other than the usual parade of squared-jawed white dudes with job titles that include some combination of the words “Consultant,” “Tech,” “Finance,” and “Senior,” we got a more diverse line-up of contestants with more interesting back stories than is typical for this show.
We got Josiah, who after a tragic childhood and a juvenile criminal conviction as a teenager, became a prosecutor at the very same district attorney’s office that once charged him with a crime. There’s Kenny, a father of a ten year-old girl and professional wrestler with the amazing stage name Pretty Boy Pitbull Kenny King. And then there’s Lucas … who says “Whaboom” a lot. Like so much. Anyone who watched this episode has definitely heard that exclamation enough times for a lifetime, so we’re not going to repeat that here again (also, he’s probably trademarked its use, and we don’t want any legal trouble here. Again, there are a bunch of attorney contestants this year, so we’re willing to guess that this is season is a little more litigious season than most). Also, Rachel was warned by a contestant from Nick’s season of The Bachelor that DeMario is not to be trusted, a warning that clearly had no meaning or implications for the following episode of television.
Anyway, Chris Harrison, still the nominal host of this program, shows up to see what these guys are thinking about Rachel. And these veritable Romeos drop romantic bon mots like, “You look at Rachel, and you’re just like, struck” and “She’s not only beautiful, but she walks … she smells so extreme … she smells so good.”
This is all a pretext to introduce the very first group date of this season. The contestant with the most extreme Richard Spencer haircut ever reads the cards of the contestants that will go on the very first, very normal date where eight guys vie for the attention of one girl during a highly structured activity set-up by producers. Richard Spence-hair reads off the names Dean, Jack Stone the law student, Jonathan, Blake, Iggy, the aforementioned Pretty Boy Pitbull Kenny King, Fred, and Whablam guy. The card reads, “I’m looking for husband material – Rachel.”
Onto the first group date! Rachel throws a barbecue with a sad portable grill and, like, two burgers. Realizing that there is no food to eat, Rachel and the guys decide to play a little touch football, with Rachel playing the quarterback position. Rachel runs an up-tempo spread office akin to Chip Kelly. Looks like she wants to be Marcus Married-ota (sorry).
During this, Whablooey annoys everyone with his Whablooey-ing. He especially annoys aspiring drummer boy Blake, who apparently knows something about this guys past. Drummer boy Blake looks like he is going to do something really dumb like confront Rachel about the guy. Which would actually play into WhamBamThankYouMa’am’s favor. The contestants who make it their sole mission to take down another contestant never go further than a two-on-one date on this show. Just ask Taylor from last season of The Bachelor. So while Blake is playing checkers, Wattaburger is playing … well definitely not chess. Maybe he’s also just playing checkers, but he’s slightly better at checkers.
After football, these guys are put to the task of seeing who is the “most husband material.” We are introduced to a competition hosted by none other than Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis. Kutcher is wearing a t-shirt with “Trophy Husband,” and they are described as “the most perfect couple in Hollywood.” Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson would like a word.
These guys are put into a relay race where they have to do dad tasks like change a diaper, strap on a Babybjörn, vacuum a carpet, de-clog a sink, and set a table. At each stage of the race, the contestant in last place will be eliminated. Kutcher describes the race as testing the contestants’ skills in ��husbandry,” which doesn’t actually mean “the act of being a husband,” as Kutcher suggests. Unless crops and animals are your wife, I suppose.
Iggy, who is wearing a dope gold chain, is eliminated immediately, mostly for trying to care for the baby doll as if it were an actual sentient human being. He looks sad in the “dog house,” which is where they put the loser, not-fit-for-Rachel husbands. As these dummies are scrambling around treating the babies like a relay baton, I’m hoping Rachel pulls a King Solomon and gives the win to Iggy with the dope chain, for not treating the stand-in for their flesh and blood progeny like a maniac.
The race ends up as a two-man competition between Pretty Boy Pitbull Kenny King and Wham!Boom as the last two. Wampum is literally drowning the baby as he’s trying to de-clog the sink. As they’re sprinting to the end, Waikiki gives an illegal stiff arm to Pretty Boy Pitbull Kenny King, who, let’s reminds ourselves, is like twice the size of WaxOnWaxOff and is an honest-to-goodness professional wrestler (on an independent circuit, but still). Wahlberg, despite eventually winning the race, is not long for this world.
After the race, the contestants go to a creepy-looking vintage store in North Hollywood that looks the set of a B-52s video. Rachel is super not impressed by these dudes at this stage of the date. Wallabang reads a terrible poem. Fred, who was a child Rachel supervised at summer camp as a child, ties to convince her to stop seeing him as the bad little boy from summer camp. Maybe stop talking summer camp, dude. Jack Stone the law student has a v. creepy posture when talking to her, head cocked and leaned in, like a snake about to strike its prey. Rachel is, perhaps instinctively, repulsed. Iggy with the dope chain does not have a dope chain of questions, sweating profusely through questions like “So career-wise, what are the prospects?” Blake apparently used to live with Whack-a-Mole’s ex-girlfriend. Brings it up with Rachel. Rachel is literally ready to use a peremptory challenge to axe all of these guys, looks like she literally couldn’t care.
Somehow, Dean does the best. He was, as a reminder, the guy that said “I’m ready to go black, and never go back,” when introduced to Rachel. They go into depth on his use of this dated, problematic cliché. He gets the group date rose. Dean has a clean-cut white face, a slightly-past-its due-date haircut, a tasteful plaid button up, and will clearly say whatever the producers tell him to, as evidenced by his “go black” comment. He seems like a composite of every successful Bachelorette contestant ever. Until this is disconfirmed, I’m just going to assume he’s the first BachelorBot designed and manufactured by the producers for the inevitable event that the U.S. depletes its reserves of attractive, straight business consultants and software salesmen who are really into Crossfit and are eager to go on TV.
Meanwhile, Pretty Boy Pitbull Kenny King is awesome. In describing the bubbling feud between Blake and Whackadoodle, he gives a great definition of circular reasoning, and drops a little inside knowledge of some of Los Angeles’s worst tourist traps: “Listen, I’m a pro wrestler. I know all about white dudes acting crazy. But everybody is just talking around in circles. So if y’all want to get on the merry-go-round, take your ass to Santa Monica and get on the merry-go-round. You white dudes are kind of bugging right now.” Kenny, you’re great, but leave the explaining of logical fallacies to us, buddy. We don’t go into your workplace and tell you how to properly execute a diving double axe handle.
Afterwards, we have a kind of boring interlude with Rachel’s one-on-one date with Peter, who looks like a young Viggo Mortensen. Piggo Mortensen and Rachel, accompanied by Rachel’s dog Copper, take a private jet to Palm Springs. Copper is adorably wearing a cast on his front leg. They go to a Coachella pool party for dogs called Bark-fest. They discuss his parents’ impression of going on The Bachelorette, their gap teeth, and therapy. He gets the date rose, and will live to fight another Sentinel. They then watch fireworks with Copper, who is probably terrified.
Finally, we get to the second group date. The date card reads, simply, “Swish.” Will, Jamey, Diggy, Alex, Adam, Richard Spence-hair, Matt, Eric, Josiah, and DeMario. The show could have just been making up half of these people and I would have had no idea. They could have told me the second date was with Chet, Dirk, Hologram Chris Pine, D’Angelo from the “Brown Sugar” video, Tommy, and Deepak Chopra and I wouldn’t have batted an eye.
DeMario is the star of this date, which is set up with his quote, “You can either sink with the fishes, or swim to shore. We’re going to see who’s built Ford ToughTM.” DeMario. First of all, the date card says “Swish.” It literally could not be any more obvious you’re playing basketball. The only alternative date would be a group discussion of whether Kanye should have kept Swish as the title to The Life of Pablo and whether the original tracklist would have made for a more cohesive album. I don’t know where this water metaphor came from. Second, fishes don’t just sink. It’s not like they’re just born and then immediately drown and die and sink to the bottom of the ocean. That’s not how fishes work, DeMario. Third, a Ford truck would probably be very bad at swimming to shore, mostly because it is a vehicle made for land and has, as far we know, no person volition or autonomy. So that’s an inapt comparison.
The guys show up to play basketball in their best ath-leisure. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar shows up to teach them the Skyhook. Some of the guys are laughably bad at basketball. Some of the guys are better. There seems to be an inversely proportional relationship between height of hair and basketball skills with these guys. DeMario can dunk. He drunks on Rachel, very disrespectfully.
They then play a real game to a “packed house,” which apparently refers to a high school gymnasium mostly filled with extras they found on Craigslist. The producers take Chris Harrison out of his mothball-strewn box to introduce the teams. DeMario’s game is a little like Boogie Cousins. He takes over the second half of the game to lead his team to victory. A group date rose is all but assured
But after the game, a girl named Lexi shows up, completely unexpectedly and unplanned by any producers, surely. Lexi informs Rachel that DeMario was still dating Lexi up until literally hours before DeMario showed up to meet Rachel on the show. Rachel goes straight into attorney-mode and holds a deposition with DeMario and Lexi. DeMario, acting on advice of counsel, denies pretty much everything, claiming that he hadn’t initiated any contact with Lexi. Lexi starts going off, addressing the camera and swearing on the graves of her father and the (future … we hope) graves of the kittens sleeping on her bed that DeMario is lying. Rachel, ever the attorney, looks at the evidence. She sees messages on Lexi’s phone indicating that DeMario was still trying to get it, and promptly dismisses him from the show. Case closed!
After the game, the remaining contestants go to Clifton’s Cafeteria in Downtown Los Angeles. They hang out next to a big tree. Rachel, shaken from the DeMario experience, calls DeMario a “dirty, dirty dog.” The editors smash cut to a taxidermied fox, which is like, close enough I guess? The guys on this group date, on the whole, are much smoother than the losers on the first. Both Josiah and Eric get some kissy face time in. Josiah snags the group date rose.
Somehow, after two hours after Bachelorette-ing, we barely even have time for the rose ceremony. During the cocktail party, Bryan the Chiropractor, Iggy with the dope chain, Jamey the Anonymous, and Summer Camp Fred are getting in some one-on-one time when DeMario arrives, wanting to speak to Rachel one last time. Chris Harrison, again de-mothballed, asks Rachel if she wants to talk to him. Rachel, wearing a dress that looks like it has literal armor on it, feels bulletproof enough to address him. All the other guys talk about wanting to kick DeMario’s ass. TO BE CONTINUED …
What we learned about love
To find love, it’s better to spout a mildly offensive cliché based on your beloved’s race than it is to have a massively annoying catchphrase that’s not based on anything. Also, a love of dogs helps.
What we learned about loss
If you’re going to dunk on your future wife, you probably shouldn’t have a current bae who is willing to show your text messages on national television.
What we learned about the LSAT
Not very much! A cursory Google search into what score Rachel got on her LSAT didn’t reveal much. We will report back details in this progressing story as they become available.
The Logical Rose-ning Section: Your Recap of The Bachelorette was originally published on LSAT Blog
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