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#we still haven't found the damn thing
0-plantaloons-0 · 1 year
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All of city folks' opinions on raccoons come from the fact that they never have to deal with raccoons, like ??
The folks that think they're just dumb rabid animals haven't seen how quickly coons learn when humans are awake to avoid them and most efficiently rob them of their trash/bird feeders (taking the whole feeder) they haven't seen how quickly they learn to open things they shouldn't and get into places they don't belong.
And the folks who think they're friendly mischief boys? Haven't lived where the coons are greedy and kill fawns and turkey polts and, again, TAKE YOUR ENTIRE FVCKING BIRD FEEDER, and get to be 30 pounds. These raccoons get fat the same way Bezos gets rich- being greedy and evil. They kill because they can, not because they need to, and they know it.
If you're wise, you do not respect raccoons, but you're aware of what they're capable of and look upon them with disdain. God will judge them one day and then they'll be satan's problem and not mine.
Fuck em.
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niallandtommo · 1 year
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mrfoox · 1 year
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For someone who's autistic and thus like... Struggle with social situations etc, I sure do... Love a lot of people like a lot...
#miranda talking shit#I dont even think i like people overall. Im an introvert so social stuff tire me out but like damn#Those handful of people who are my friends id all do everything for tho. If we've talked more than 10 times in the past#Youre my friend and im willing to lie for the cops for you among other things.#Its a bit dangerous for me sincr i know im such an... Ride or die person plus with my asd i can be taken advantage of very badly#But so far in my life ive never had that ... Not to fhe point its like... Actually a huge problem. Ive gotten scammed in the past bc#Im too trusting. But not by a big amount or something i will be truly broken up over losing? But like yeah. I dont often say the fact id#Do like anything for people i love bc that is probably scary but legit. I care for you... I'll gladly do a lot of shit for you. No one have#I understand why people are somewhat scared of me and bc i feel too much bc sometimes it scares me too. I'd go through so much#Absolute shit for someone i love if they needed that of me. Id comprise so much of myself for others and it is kinda scary#I guess i should be glad i haven't... Attracted the type of people who would take advantage of my kindness.. I know many dont#Have the luck i do with people. But somewhat i think im also a decent person feeler. I dont give my time to people i get bad vibes from#Thats why i dont think ive ever had a problem with... Fake people or two-faced people? I think everyone in my life. Friend wise#Are all very honest/genuine. Thats a common trait among all people i cherish that and that they care. All do care and love in different way#But all have a caring side to them. And im glad. Those traits i value very highly and im glad that everyone in my life basically share that#I havent gone out of my way to find 90% of them but still they have found me/we found each other and i love that
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heartfullofleeches · 3 months
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[+18]
V and fuckboy playboy/wingman male Darling-
Hear me out-
Darling is the son of some other loaded family that has close ties with V's. The two cross paths at a gathering and their parents urge them to make friends. Darling plays video games. V plays video games. They exchange numbers with some persuasion from their folks and set up a time to play something together although begrudgingly on V's end. V ends up having a better time than he expected, but right before he really starts to enjoy his time with Darling - he tells V he has to head out.
"Nice meeting you, dude. We gotta do this again. I got a girl coming over and I gotta bounce."
And just like that V's hopes are crushed. He's still learning about his attraction towards guys, but - Darling was sorta cute....
"oh....so you have a girlfriend."
Darling laughs.
"Nah, man. Haven't found the right girl...or guy to tie me down yet, plus I'm just enjoying the single life for now.... I can send pics after we're done if you want. She's totally chill and likes when I show her off."
Pictures?.... V agrees - thinking not much of it. He goes back to playing and eventually it slips from his mind. Hours later he receives photos of what looks to be a topless girl in a dimly lit room. She smiles big at the camera - eyes and upper face blocked from sight by the shaft of the bastard with her cheek pressed to his inner thigh. He still had on the same pair of sweats V had seen him in earlier that day. He only met this guy not even twenty-four hours ago and now he's seen his dick. Even worse - there's a pretty girl with her lipstick and spit all over it in the same picture. V's pissed - yet the image magically appears in one of his porn holders later on."
"what the hell...."
"My bad! I thought you might like it. You don't seem like a guy who gets a lot of action... If you ever want to meet someone, just give me a call. I know a lot of people who'd be interested in a rich brat like you."
This guy.... he acts like he's any different. V thinks Darling is a freak to put things lightly, but its not like he has other people to hang out with. As the two hang out V sees that Darling isn't as bad as he first seemed. He's still a horny, inconsiderate prick most days - but he's still the best thing V has to a friend and cares for V in his own way..... Still sends V dick pics he sweats were for someone els.
Darling is genuinely surprised that V has never been with someone. Sure, he doesn't seem like he gets that much attention, but he was sure V had at least kissed someone once. The topic comes up when Darling tries for the hundredth time to hook with up with one of his flings. He's always sending V evidence of the nights he spent with strangers. Oddly enough - V only ever complains about the videos and photos when they don't have darling in them as well.
"Damn.... I know you're a pain in the ass sometimes, but you're cute I thought somebody would've looked past that.....
V hates with Darling says shit like that. He's not used to people flirting with him and... and it gives him false hope. "Shut up....
"So, think she's cute? I can give her your number~"
"I don't want it."
This sucks.... By now, V's fully aware of his crush on Darling - and he fucking hates the bastard for what he's doing to him. If Darling is so concerned about him seeing people why doesn't he just take V out instead. He jerks off to everything Darling sends him wondering when he'll get his turn. V has some solace in the fact Darling rare sees any of his partners twice. V has been with him and always will be with him longer than any of them have. He just has to be patient.....and ruin any chances Darling has of being with anyone else.
V nearly jumps out of his skin reading one of Darling's numerous drunken texts.
"Hey, man. Totally speaking out my ass here, but would you ever be down to have a threesome sometime ;)"
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teatreeoilll · 4 months
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Happy Birthday! (Yuji Itadori X Reader)
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w/c - 1k content - Yuji forgets readers' birthday, implied f!reader, inspired by like every sitcom in existence, little fluff/angst towards the end for the cutie patootie @numberonenachopanda, happy birthday! I hope you like it
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“Why aren’t you dressed yet?” Megumi teases, leaning effortlessly against the doorway to Yuji’s room, “We’re going to be late.”
“Huh?” Yuji’s eyes drift away from the manga he’s holding, “Late for what?”
Megumi locks eyes with him, “You’re joking, right?”
"Are we getting sent on a mission? At this hour?" Yuji scratches his head, closing the book with a thud to place it on the dresser.
"I knew you were thick, but this is.." Megumi lets out a theatrical sigh. "Remember a few days ago when Kugisaki dragged us to that beauty store?"
Yuji furrows his brows. "I'm not stupid, Fushiguro," he retorts, "Of course I remember; we were stuck there for hours while she picked out a gift for (Name)'s birthday."
Megumi waits patiently for the epiphany to reach Yuji's unsuspecting mind.
"(Name)'s birthday," He mutters, "(Name)'s birthday!" He exclaims, hopping off the bed.
"There it is." Megumi breathed, watching the pink-haired boy struggle to hastily put on a pair of trousers.
"Fushiguro," Yuji tugs at his friend's sleeve, a hint of worry in his voice, just before leaving his room. "I was around her all day and haven't said happy birthday once. She's probably angry, right?"
"Yeah, she probably is, especially considering her old friends shut her out as soon as she moved here."
"That explains a lot of today; wait, her friends did what?"
Earlier that day
On your way to the classroom, Nobara seized a moment to slip a carefully wrapped birthday present into your hands with an excited glint in her eye. Meanwhile, Megumi offered a subtle 'Happy Birthday' as you passed each other in the hallway.
"Good morning," Yuji greets, entering the class. Just as he began to utter a small "Ha-", your own smile widened, anticipating the warm wishes about to follow. "How'd you sleep?" He quizzed.
"Fine, how about you?" You answered, still awaiting the expected birthday wishes.
"I slept great!" He beamed, "I think it has something to do with.."
Wait. He didn't forget, did he?
In the car on the way to a mission in an abandoned hospital, while Yuji went on and on about the upcoming premier of Human Worm 4, it finally dawned on you that he wasn't waiting for a special moment to congratulate you - but that the fact that it was your birthday completely slipped his mind.
"You're coming with me, right?" His cheerful inquiry was accompanied by a playful smack on the shoulder.
"I'll, uh, listen - " A tug in your heart made you hesitate, but your pride held back the words you wanted to say, "I'll think about it."
"What? But you said you wanted to see it!"
True, you did want to go, but not due to a newfound appreciation for cheap horror flicks, but because, as time passed in Jujutsu High, you managed to develop a crush on the lighthearted pink-haired boy.
"I'll let you know, okay?" Your stony expression makes him drop the subject for the remainder of the ride.
-
As you watched Yuji being swarmed by a flock of low-level curses - while quite aware that you could disperse most of them with a flick of your wrist - you found a mischievous urge that tempted you to prolong the scene.
"Ah - crap - damn, ow!" His muffled swearing reaches your ears as he grapples with the relentless assault, "Why are there so many of these things?"
As his swearing grew louder, you couldn't escape the growing sense of unease, knowing that his technique wasn't the best thing to handle the growing number of the fly-looking creatures.
With the pangs of conscience growing by the moment, you turn to help him, "Itadori!" you yelled, "Duck!"
-
Yuji flinches every time you press the alcohol-soaked cotton pad to his face, hissing lightly at the burning sensation on his skin.
"I'm sorry," you mutter, tossing it away and placing a bandaid on the graze on his cheek.
"What are you sorry for?" His puzzled expression meets yours, "It's kind of embarrassing anyway, isn't it? These fly-things were so weak but I still needed help."
"It's not embarrassing," you mutter before remembering you were supposed to be angry with him, "But I wouldn't tell Fushiguro if I were you."
That evening
"Aren't you going in, Fushiguro?" Yuji questions, his hand resting on the doorknob.
"I think I'll wait here for a moment," Megumi replied, leaning on the wall, already engrossed in his phone.
"Happy birthday!" Yuji burst into the room, an awkward smile plastered on his lips, "Please don't hate me."
Your attention shifts towards the door. Nobara makes a swift exit as soon as she sees the change in your expression; leaving you alone with Yuji and the growing unease in the room.
"I don't hate you," you utter, struggling to keep your aloof expression in the face of his remorseful look, "You can tell Kugiaski and Fushiguro to come in now."
"Are you sure?" Yuji furrows his brows; it still looks like she's angry, he thinks.
"Yeah, I'm sure. I guess we just aren't as close as I thought," The words slip out carelessly, leaving a bitter aftertaste in the air.
"What are you talking about?" He murmurs, his tone shifting to an uncharacteristic aggression, "I'm not one of those shitty friends you had in your hometown." He quickly backtracked, "I mean - I didn't mean to call your friends shitty - it's just that what they did was shitty." He stopped for a moment to take a breath, "Actually, I'm kind of a shitty friend too now, aren't I?"
"Well, it's not like it was on purpose," you sigh, "so it's fine."
"It's not fine!" He exclaims, "How about you forget my birthday? Then it'll be fair."
"It's March 20th, right?" A pink blush spreads across his cheeks at how casually you remembered the date. "A little too late for me to forget your birthday, Yuji. How about I buy you a calendar instead?"
"Y-Yeah," he stammers, "sounds good." He lets a moment pass before asking, "Do you really think we aren't that close?"
Your heartbeat deafens your ears, cheeks growing warmer by the second, "No, I just - I was just -" You babble through the embarrassment.
"Never mind, that was a silly question, wasn't it? We've only met a couple of months ago." He reaches for your palm, clasping it between his hands as he locks eyes with you. The soft gesture creates a subtle whirl in your stomach.
"I really am sorry," he whispers, "Happy birthday."
-
Meanwhile, Megumi and Nobara are guarding the door, trying to figure out when would be the right time to let you know that the rest of the Jujutsu High students and faculty they've invited are waiting outside, and the room isn't as soundproof as you think.
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ghosts-cyphera · 8 months
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Drawing Trust
╰﹒to comfort a young girl who has just lost her entire family, Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley borrows out the two things that bring him reassurance. his mask, and you.
warnings/content: themes of death/blood/violence, but overall just a fluffy little thing. gn!reader; simon taking off his mask for the first time in front of you; word count 2.3k
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The maroon carpet was rough against the palms of your hands, as you sat cross-legged on the floor of the dimly-lit office. The night had fallen hours prior, and you stifled a yawn, as the quiet minutes stretched out: the only sound to be heard was the scribbling of the slightly dry ballpoint pens and the deep breathing of the concentrated child sitting beside you. 
With her tongue nipped between her teeth and her eyes slightly squinted, she drew on the finishing touches and turned to you.
"Done."
"Look at you go." You smiled, as you leaned over to take a look at the blue, black, and red lines. The blue lines formed a box to which four black sticks, each with four smaller sticks at their tips, were connected. Two small circles, which you assumed were eyes, and a red curve right underneath them formed a down-turned pout on the features of the box-bodied stick figure.
"Leila," you gasped, as you turned to the little girl. "I was about to claim this to be yet another masterpiece, but I've just now seen that the mouth—"
She leaned in to take a look.
"It's upside down." You furrowed your brows. "This can't be right, can it?"
The little girl grinned. "It's right because he's sad."
"Sad?" You raised a brow. "But how could anyone be sad when they have such a neat t-shirt on? The blue really highlights the color of his eyes, you know. An awesome choice on your end."
"I only had three colors."
"Still," you chuckled, as you pulled out another sheet of white printer paper and handed it to her. "Only a true artist knows where to use each color. What do you say we play 'draw-and-guess'?"
"He's sad because his family is dead."
Alright. No draw-and-guess.
Leila's fingers closed once more around the ballpoint pens to continue the drawing. Now, connected to the smaller sticks—the fingers of the box-bodied stick figure—something resembling a black banana was being drawn. 
Yet, you knew.
"He's sad because he killed his family." Her tiny little fingers wrapped around the red ballpoint pen, as she started to add splatters of blood, much in the shape of flowers, all around the paper. "They weren't really his family, not really. But they were as good as his real family, Mama said. He had been with them ever since he was a boy, but Mama said he became really bad and that's why he was with the cartel who wanted him dead, and his family dead. So then he killed them."
Indeed. It had not been a black banana that the target had been holding when your squad had found him a couple of hours prior with a self-inflicted bullet wound to the temple. The whole mission had been one big shitshow: suspects and leads turning up dead around one corner and another, until… 
Until.
"But he didn't kill me, which is nice because I like hanging out with you." Leila's voice was matter-of-factly as she flashed you a warm smile. So matter-of-factly, indeed, that if she had not just heard his entire foster family dying, you might have laughed at the cheery tone of her voice.
"Oh, yeah?" You managed, as you gently nudged her with your shoulder. "Well, that makes two of us then, doesn't it? I haven't had this much fun since I sneaked into the office of my boss to steal his stash of candy."
Her eyes suddenly beginning to twinkle, Leila raised her gaze to meet yours: her drawing now lying long forgotten on the carpeted floor. "Candy?"
This you did know how to handle.
"Mountains, and mountains, and damn mountains of it," you confirmed with a grin. "I'm afraid I took a little more than I should have, but I'm sure there's still some left. Wanna go sneak around and see if we can find some of your favorites?"
"Maybe they have Three Musketeers," she nodded her head, as she hopped up from the floor. "Or Reese's. When it was Halloween, I ate so many Reese's that my poo—" Her words suddenly died down on her lips, as she took a rushed step closer to you. 
You frowned. "Leila, are you—" 
And that's when you saw the movement at the door of the office. 
The figure standing by the door frame was so tall and wide that it blocked out most of the light streaming in from the hallway, and as it moved to take a step towards the two of you, Leila rushed to hide behind your back, small fingers closing around your arm. 
"Oh, sweetheart," you rushed to speak with a breathless chuckle, your brows furrowed. "It's alright, it's just my friend."
As if finally registering the sudden shift in the mood, Ghost's steps came to a halt, and his eyes darted to search yours.
"Ghost," you smiled, making sure that your voice remained warm and steady. "This is Leila. Leila, darling, this is my friend, Ghost."
Despite feeling the way that she shifted her weight from one foot to another, she did not answer, as she continued clinging to your arm.
"I know he's a little big and mangy—," Ghost raised his brow at you, and you bit down your laugh, "but he was there when I found you. He had my back when I carried you back to the cars so that we could both get out safely." Your voice was a warm hum. "Would it be alright if he came here to say hi to you?"
Quiet.
"If you don't want to talk, that's alright. How about you go and squeeze my arm if it's alright with you that he comes over?"
Five small fingers squeezed around your arm, and you nodded your head with a gentle smile. "Atta girl."
On Ghost's features, you could see his gentle hesitance, as his heavy feet led him to take a few careful steps towards the two of you. With you sitting on the ground, he looked even taller and broader than he usually did, and just as you were about to ask him to crouch on the floor with you, he took the hint.
With his padded knees touching the carpeted floor, he spoke with a warm voice despite its low rumble. "Hello, there. It's Leila, yeah? My name's Ghost. I'm—err—I'm a friend of Sarge here."
"The bestest friend," you hummed with a soft chuckle, and from your words, the corners of Ghost's eyes crinkled.
"The mask’s what’s scarin' you, yeah?" He gestured towards the piece fashioned after a skull, and you could feel Leila taking a step behind your back. To peek over your shoulder or to hide further away, you were not sure of.
"It's—err—it's something that—," Ghost attempted. "It's something that makes me feel safe. Less scared, yeah? It's like—when I've got it on, I'm in my own world, yeah? In my own bubble."
You smiled, as you turned your head ever so slightly towards Leila. "Have you got something like that, love? Something that makes you feel less scared?"
And just as you thought that she was not ready to speak yet, the hesitant voice replied back. "I have a turtle. Eugene."
Ghost's laugh was low—all while gentle and warm—as he nodded his head. "That's a bloody brilliant name for a turtle, that is. You've got Eugene with you?"
"No," the small voice called back.
Oh no.
The same realization that crashed upon you visibly dawned upon Ghost, too, for you could notice the way that he blinked his eyes shut for a split second in his regret.
"I forgot to take him with me." Leila's voice cracked, and with it, your heart clenched in your chest. "I miss him."
"What do you say I—," Ghost glanced at you, lowering his voice ever so slightly. "I can go back 'n get it for her, yeah?"
"They had to pull all the troops back," you shook your head. "Something about explosives in the basement. They're waiting for SWAT to arrive to clear the house."
Fuck, his eyes told you. 
I know, the raise of your brow answered, just as the quiet sniffle sounded from behind your back. What the fuck do we do now?
Ghost blinked his eyes shut for a moment, and then with a deep breath, he spoke. "Leila, love?" He sat down on the carpet, his fingers gently moving aside the drawings. "Remember what I told you about the mask, yeah? About how it keeps me safe and protects me?"
A quiet sniffle came from behind your shoulder, followed by a quiet "yeah."
"Well, having assessed the situation at hand, in my—err—professional opinion, it seems like it's you who's needing the mask right now more than I am, yeah?"
You blinked at his words, your lips parting ever so slightly as his gloved fingers moved to the hem of his mask. You could see the soft hesitation in his movements: the gentle shake of his hands, barely noticeable yet there if you knew to look for it.
And with a deep breath, he pulled it off.
Pausing for the briefest of moments, he looked at the mask in his fingers before raising his gaze. At first, it was headed slightly past you towards the girl behind your back, and then, it drifted to you.
He was your Ghost.
The corners of your lips tugged into a smile, and you swallowed as you nodded your head once and thrice. 
He was your Ghost, and he was beautiful.
Fucking hell.
From the sudden blurriness of your gaze, you glanced up in a desperate attempt to blink away your tears, only to give up with a soft chuckle as you felt two of them rolling down your cheeks, slow and gentle.
Happy: the same happiness reflecting back on the features of Ghost, as the tip of his boot brushed against yours. 
I'm here, his eyes told you. It's alright.
The sudden gentle movement behind your back drew you back into the moment, and just as you forced your lips to part, Ghost, instead, took the lead.
"Wanna come ‘n take a look at it?"
While her movements were still overshadowed by her hesitance, there was now a hint of curiosity too in the way that Leila slipped out from behind your back, and walked to Ghost.
Sitting cross-legged next to him, she carefully reached for the mask, her index finger running across the cheek of the skull.
"It's not soft like Eugene is," she hummed before her carefully twinkling eyes found those of Ghost.
"No," he laughed with a nod of his head. As he did, his nose scrunched up ever so slightly, and you bit your lip to hide your smile. "No, but what I like about it is… When you have it on, no one can see your face, right? It's—"
"Oh, it's like—," Leila smiled, as her fingers traced the edges of the skull. "It's like the shell of Eugene. When he's scared, or—or when he needs to be alone, he can go into his shell and feel safe because it's just him there."
"Yeah. Something like that, yeah," Ghost nodded with a smile. "Wanna—err—wanna try it on?"
Her eyes sparkling now, Leila nodded her head fast and hard enough to surely get the girl dizzy were she to keep it up. "Yes, please."
"C'mere then, yeah?" His fingers fumbled with the fabric, as he got it straightened out. "Look up." She did as she was told, and Ghost slid it over her head—only for the three of you to laugh, as it slipped over her eyes. "Hold up. There ya go, yeah? Can you see through the holes?"
"Yeah," Leila called out, her voice slightly muffled. Despite not being able to see her little features any longer—her button nose and freckled cheeks hidden by the mask far too big and wide for her delicate features—you could hear the burning excitement in her voice, as the mask shook with her nods. "This is awesome. Do I look scary now?"
"Fuckin' terrifying," Ghost grinned.
"How does it feel?" You hummed, leaning back. 
"Safe," Leila confirmed with a chuckle.
"Yeah? Like the shell of Eugene, eh?"
"Yeah, like I was hiding in a shell." She laughed. "A big shell. A stinky shell."
Ghost's eyes blinking shut, he nodded his head as a deeply amused laugh danced from your lips. 
"Yeah. Yeah," he grinned, the apples of his cheeks slightly flushed as his hand moved to rub his face with his laughter. "This turtle might've been a little lazy with his fuckin’ baths lately, eh? What do you say you give it back here before you embarrass me further in front of my best friend, yeah?"
Leila laughed as her little hands moved to slide the mask off her features, and she drew in an exaggerated breath. "Ah, lovely fresh air."
"Little shit," Ghost grinned, and you playfully kicked him with your boot. 
"Keep it up and we're not taking you with us on our candy heist, are we, Leila?" 
"Nah, he can come," Leila smiled, as she offered her hand to urge you up from the ground. "He's fun, even if he's stinking. Besides," she then chuckled as she pulled you up, before offering her hand for Ghost. “We need him to carry it all back. Because he's stronger than we are."
"Happy to be fuckin' useful," he chuckled.
"And if we get caught," you arched an amused brow at the girl, softly elbowing Ghost as you did, "we can blame it all on him."
"See, this is why I like you," Leila announced, as she started leading the way out of the office. Yet not before her voice, gently amused yet oh-so-knowing, had added: "And probably why Ghost's in love with you, too."
The corners of your lips tugged into a smirk, and you raised a brow at him. "That so, Lt.?"
"It was you who demoted me, darlin’," he chuckled under his breath, as his fingers brushed against yours, gentle and knowing. "Best friend, eh?”
Or maybe—just maybe—something just a little bit more than that.
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a/n: if you liked this wee little thing, please do let me know via comments, tags, or asks—whatever works for you. reading your feedback means the absolute world to me. ♡
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joeys-babe · 5 months
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Joey B Blurbs: Drive My Car
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Summary: You still haven't learned your lesson… and are back with a Joe prank! Now it's calling your poor husband to tell him about your discovery of “Christmas gas”.
Warnings: Fluff, slight illusion to smut
Pairing: Joe Burrow x reader
Imagine universe: Into The Mystic
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December 12th, 2023
I still don't know how Joe isn't tired of me and my tricks yet. After all of the pranks I've pulled on him I just keep finding more.
Bored in bed since Joe was gone, I found a prank I could do on him over the phone and immediately got down to business.
He was at his parent's house helping his mom build a new dresser like the amazing son he is while I stayed at home with Tyson and Miles. They weren't awake yet so I could put Joe on speaker while recording with his iPad.
After making my hair look decent I pulled Joe’s contact up and called him.
In usual amazing husband fashion, he answered in less than two rings.
“Hey Joey.” - you
“Hey, Mama. What's up? Do I need to step outside for this.” - Joe
Even though I loved Robin with my whole heart, I really didn't want her to think I was a ditz who thought diesel was “Christmas gas”.
“Uhm, yes.” - you
“Okay gimme a sec.” - Joe
A few moments later you could hear the back sliding door shut and Joe told you to keep going.
“Okay so the other day I saw this TikTok about this thing called Christmas gas and I wanted to try it. So I did. Now my car barely even got home and it was making a weird sound.” - you
“Baby… what? What the fuck is Christmas gas and where did you get it?” - Joe
“The gas station we always go to! It's just gas that's supposed to smell like pine wood for the holidays.” - you
I had to mute myself because I was dying laughing. Joe sighed and groaned out of pure annoyance before clearing his throat to speak.
“You actually put it in your car?” - Joe
“Mhm. Should I have not of?” - you
“I don't know, y/n! I've never heard of damn Santa gas or whatever the hell!” - Joe
“Christmas gas! It’s a limited edition!” - you
“Limited edition… baby why would they have limited edition gas?” - Joe
“I don't know. It was like three more dollars a gallon though and didn't even smell like pine wood.” - you
“Oh my god. y/n, was it coming from the green nozzle?” - Joe
“Yes! You have heard of it!” - you
“y/n, that's diesel babe! Did you put diesel in your car?” - Joe
“No, I put the Christmas gas in.” - you
“The green nozzle is diesel, y/n. That's why it was 3 more dollars than the regular gas, and why your car isn't working, because you put diesel in your gas car!” - Joe
“Are you sure? The gas station was decorated for Christmas and the green pump even had lights on it.” - you
“Yes, I'm sure! I'm gonna have to call the mechanic and take your car in when I get home later. Hopefully, your engine isn't ruined.” - Joe
“Is my car going to be ruined, Joey?” - you
“I don't know baby. You have to stop doing those stupid TikTok trends, y/n.” - Joe
“I’m sorry Joe. If my car’s ruined don't feel like you have to get it fixed.” - you
“That's BS. Imma get your damn car fixed. Just promise you won't do stuff like that till you run it by me because it might be a scam.” - Joe
“Okay, baby. I love you.” - you
“I love you too, just don't use your car till I get home. If you need to go somewhere before I do just take one of mine.” - Joe
“Thank you, just one more thing to tell you before you go.” - you
“Please tell me you didn't get your oil changed with reindeer piss.” - Joe
I busted out laughing and Joe giggled along with me, proud of how he was quick enough to make a funny joke.
“No! But… this was a prank.” - you
“Oh my god y/n! So your car is fine?” - Joe
“Yes. I haven't even left the house… or even the bed yet today.” - you
“Shit babe, you had me worried for a minute. Well, I'm gonna go. I love you.” - Joe
“I love you too! Kinda sad I won't get to see you play sexy mechanic though.” - you
“Pregnancy hormones?” - Joe chuckled
“They’re through the roof.” - you giggled
“I’ll help when I get home.” - Joe
I could practically hear his smirk in his lust-laced promise.
“Bye, Joey.” - you
“Bye, Mama. Don’t be buyin’ any gasoline from elves ya hear?” - Joe
“Yes, sir.” - you laughed and Joe hung up
That gorgeous man is a saint for putting up with me.
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Authors note: this is my favorite thing ever?! Saw this request in my inbox and IMMEDIATELY started writing.
Request for this fic;
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2smolbeans · 7 months
Text
"Nearly breaking down as you saw Marco softly smile at you. A smile you haven't seen ever since he found his 'darling'."
Part 2 Part 2.5 character info
Love Me, Love Me Not
Yandere Best Friend x Obstacle Reader
*unedited
Tags: kidnapping, complicit murder, guilt, suggestive tones, mixed signals, eventual smut, oneshot, reader is going through mixed feelings, one sided crush, yandere is in love with someone else, imprisonment, will they won't they vibes.
Disclaimer: This is just a scenario I thought of with an Oc! So nothing is really 'official' or canon-
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One too many times, you should've called the police. Why didn't you though? Now you sit there on the shower floor, hot water burning your back as you try to warm up the chill that goes down your spine. Their eyes, oh god they were open and staring at you dead in fear. Why did you cover for him?
You felt the sob trapped in your throat rip out of you as you remembered all the horrible things you were complicit in. There was nothing you could do now but accept the reality. You wouldn't get caught. The two of you burned all the evidence, and sadly, the victims were easy to dispose of. Did anyone look for them? Was anyone curious about them going missing?
The guilt was heavy, and it didn't help that the person you did it for- couldn't give two shits about you.
Marco, your happy go lucky best friend. You remembered that night when he called you, in a panic, begging you to rush to where he was. Of course you went, you were so worried for him. Upon arrival, you saw the large bag and tools. The look on his face warning you to do as he says before he decides to have another matching body bag beside him.
"You trust me don't you? I just need help with this, and then we can be over with it!"
You should've ran, screamed, called for help. But instead, you just grabbed the lower half of the bag, feeling the dreadful sensation of its limbs. You heard a shocked hum across you before the bag lifted off the ground.
"This is why you're always my number one go to. I apperciate this, I mean it. I won't ever forget this. Now follow me 'kay?"
What a joke. It was all a lie, wasn't it? All of that just for some sick obsession. Just for his "girlfriend" to focus on him and him only. If Marco just pursued her normally like a decent fucking human being, nobody would've been hurt, lies wouldn't have been told, your friendship would've been intact..
He could've just told those once alive victims that he wanted to ask her out. If Marco just smiled at her like he used to smile towards you- you're damn sure she would've fallen for him.
It worked for you afterall..
Maybe you should've let go when you had the chance. Cause now here you are, fending for your life as the killer you once called a friend claims you're the very obstacle of their relationship.
What? But you helped him?
You're staring at her in the wrong way.
Are you fucking kidding me? Does he know how many times you cried. The nights you spent mourning for the dead and the friendship that once was?
He still cares about you. But you forced him to get rid of you.
That's funny since you're currently showering at his apartment. You can't leave, though. He's locked the doors and windows. He even went as far as locking the knife cabniet and potential weapons. Still with the shower running, you didn't flinch at the sound of the bathroom door opening.
Curled up in a ball as you sat in the shower, you finally saw the eyes staring down at your naked form. You couldn't read his face, understand his expression, or even tell what he was thinking. It was foreign, new.
"Hey. Are you done? You're taking up the water bill y'know?"
Oh right, how long were you there for? Awkardly, you tried standing up while covering yourself with what little your hands could hide. You hoped he would at least save you some dignity, but he just kept staring with a blank expression.
"Here's a towel. Dry up and come to the kitchen. I made us something to eat"
You thanked Marco as you were quick to wrap your body with the towel. Looking again at Marco, you saw a hint of dissapointnent splay upon his eyes.
"Okay..Well just-Just..do whatever. Don't take too long or else I'll drag you out myself."
Rolling your eyes, you pushed Marco out of the bathroom as you closed the door. Locking - Oh right, he removed all the locks to each room..Drying off your body, you put on the clothes he left for you. Eventually, you made it to the kitchen, sitting down on the chair as you watched him cook.
He looked so calm, so soft as he focused on flipping the meat. You almost smiled when you heard him mutter about how he spilled some oil on his shirt.
Eventually sitting down to join you, Marco gave you your food as he offered you a drink. You declined of course, not feeling thirsty and paranoid of whatever poison he might spike it with. Smelling the aroma of the food, you felt your mouth water. He was always a good cook, hell you remembered the first time you visited his place.
How he made you a nice cooked lamb with mash potatoes. You recalled it being the first time you've ever seen Marco so particular about a certain thing - even though he's always been a speradic and chaotic individual. Though, the quick realization of your perdicment made the food cold and unappetizing.
Biting your lip, you turn your head away as you felt your eyes burn.
Don't cry, don't cry.
You sucked it up. Inhaled the air that surrounded you and forced a bite into your mouth. The food was good, you couldn't deny it. But it didn't taste as good as it did before. It's good, you say. Nearly breaking down as you saw Marco softly smile at you. A smile you haven't seen ever since he found his 'darling'. You want to run away and cry, to start fresh and new.
"I'm actually glad you moved in with me, it feels nice talking to someone who's helped me"
With the murders?
"Hey, we finally reached one of our bucket lists! To be roomates! Huh, well isn't that kind of funny? And we didn't even plan it out- kinda just happened huh!"
He was just rubbing the salt in the wound at this point. Forcing a smile, you just continued eating, chewing your food as a distraction as he kept on staring at you. Where's his girlfriend? Why didn’t he just make her move into his apartment if you're in the way?
"Oh her? She's at work, don't worry about it"
You stop eating, finishing your plate as you push it towards Marco.
"All done? I'm glad you enjoyed it! Just sit right there while I put everything away"
Is there any way for you to escape? There has to be a way, right? What are you doing here? How long is Marco planning on keeping you alive?
"Hey, your not thinking of doing anything weird right?"
You nod your head no profusely, trying to get his suspicion off of you. Patting your shoulder, Marco motions you to the couch. Sitting down before you as he drags you along with him. Placing you on his lap, he turns on the TV- switching through channels while you freeze on the spot.
"Is there anything you want to tell me?"
Out of nowhere, his hands slowly begin to play with your shirt. His fingers rubbing up and down your sides, his crouch nearly pressing against you. Confused, you just sit there, your hands on your knees as you glued your eyes to the screen.
"You're not lying to me, are you?"
His voice is so sweet, so much closer than you anticapted. You nearly buck against his touch just as his palm brushes a certain spot ever so subtly. Why was he doing this? You had a slight speculation why - or at least a hopeful stupid thought that would fufill your old wishes.
"...If you say so"
You find yourself now sitting beside him, pushed off of his lap. Feeling the weight shift on the couch, Marco stood up and walked away for what seemed like forever.
"I just remembered I have to quickly run by to get some things. I'll be back.."
If like nothing happened, you were alone. Confused, you wave your hands around as you scrunch up your face. Talking to yourself as you pace around the room. Calming down, you walk towards the door. Examining it as you realised that Marco had left one of the security laches loose. Should you risk it? You could grab the butterknife he gave you for the meal to loosen the door..
Oh fuck.
You could perhaps finally leave.
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Part 2 coming up soon!
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ferrstappen · 1 year
Note
accidentally referencing them as "my" with max please!
what are we doing here? - MV1
The only clear thing between you and Max is that neither of you knew what you were.
Friends? Very close friends? Situationship? Love each other but afraid to make a move?
So many ways to describe it, but still moving between blurred lines, where you snuck out of his hotel room before someone came knocking on the door to wake him up or brief him as he got ready to leave, going out with your friends to a bar where you'd start acting as close friends, but as alcohol started burning your throats and clouding your judgement, his arm found home around your shoulders and your head nuzzled on his neck, loving how he shivered and smiled whenever your lips curled up at something you said or left a quick kiss on his neck.
Everybody knew there was something going on, and no, your friends knew it wasn't just kissing and sneaking around, it was deeper, something that neither you nor Max were willing to accept and act on it.
Months went by and it didn't change. You were exclusive, the thought of looking at someone else didn't cross your mind, but the mere idea of Max sharing time and space with beautiful women from all around the world, it was mind boggling for you.
Unbeknownst to you, Max felt the same rush of blood to his head whenever someone in the paddock started a conversation with you, standing a little too close for his liking, knowing his male equals enough to be sure they wanted to have you to themselves, and he couldn't do anything to stop that.
Well, he could do one thing, but for him it wasn't even a possibility, not wanting to leave the small paradise you had created, with no problems, no labels, no feelings... he'd be damned if he vocalized that it was a problem not having you to himself every day with no excuse, just calling you by your name like he was any other man in your life, and if he expressed his feelings were beyond a simple friendship, he wanted it all.
And so did you, you wanted to walk hand in hand with Max and it being familiar, not getting surprised looks. you wanted for him to claim you just like he had claimed your heart and body. you craved for him to look for you after a race, holding his helmet and symbolically kissing his lips in front of every camera, every screen who was watching.
All those thoughts were wandering as the both of you were talking before the race, with his fireproofs hanging low on his waist and you trying to fix a loose strand of hair, not caring that it was futile since he'd be putting on his helmet in no time.
Then, a woman you had barely crossed paths with came along, giving Max a tight hug and wishing him good luck, telling him to not go too crazy on the track for the sake of her husband.
Huh.
"Oh, i have seen you so many times before and we haven't been introduced! Max what are you waiting for?" Geri Halliwell, beautiful and elegant as ever, asked Max who was caught off guard.
The words left Max's lips without a second thought, a worry, and it felt so natural: "This is (Y/N), she's my girl,"
My girl.
He didn't even flinch, placing his hand on your waist as Geri kept commenting you were such a good looking couple, complemented each other so well, that you must be so proud, and you really were, everyone could see it.
"I'll leave you both, but I'll find you sweetheart on the garage when the race starts and the boys go do their thing, okay?" Geri said to you, leaving you a bit dumbfounded but agreeing to what she said, leaving you and Max.
His hand didn't leave you waist, it only changed its position as you turned to face him.
"I'm your girl?" Your head tilted a bit, trying to read his expression.
His cheeks flushed and he was insecure for the first time, his blue eyes avoiding yours, but lovingly accepting when your hand found its place on his cheek. "I like it, how it sounds,"
In the middle of loud noises, screens full of statistics and people calling for Max, you took his hand in yours and left a chaste kiss on his lips before sending him off to get ready and get in the car.
For the first time, Max wanted the race to be over as soon as possible, adrenaline rushing but not because of the vibrations of the car and crowds cheering, but because of what was waiting for him after the finish line.
his girl.
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roosterforme · 2 months
Text
Adult Education Part 23 | Hangman x OC
Summary: Jake has found everything he needs in one person. He knows deep inside that nothing is going to change Jessica's love for him, but he's nervous to tell her what's been on his mind. When he opens himself up to her even more, she gives him everything he wants.
Warnings: Fluff, smut, pegging, anal, language, 18+
Length: 3400 words
Pairing: Jake "Hangman" Seresin x Female OC
This story is part of the Beer Boy and Sugar universe but can be read on its own! Adult Education masterlist
Seriously, who let Jake on my masterlist!? Banner by @mak-32
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Epilogue Part Two
Five more months later...
Jessica was just settling down on the couch with a mug of tea when Jake got home from work. "Hey, Baby," he said as he undid the top buttons on his khaki uniform shirt. "How was your day?"
"Not bad," she replied, absolutely loving that her Fridays ended early this term. "I started making a list of what we need to pack for Cabo, and I printed out my final exam sheets. Dinner's in the oven, and I'm about to email Luca back. He asked me if I wanted him to stop by with his skateboard next week. Isn't he adorable?"
Jake smirked as she reached for him. "You made dinner? Seriously?"
She rolled her eyes as she said, "Don't be silly, Smart Boy. I took the pan of lasagna that you left in the refrigerator and put it in the oven."
"Yeah, that makes more sense," he drawled as she looked up at him from the couch. 
"Your uniforms are ruining my life," she whispered as she ran her hands along his thigh and took his zipper pull between her thumb and index finger. "Ever since I actually flew with you in your flight suit, I can't get enough of all of these things. I've been enjoying all the role playing."
Jake pressed his lips together, a thoughtful look on his face. "I noticed you've been having a lot of fun bossing me around lately."
She hummed as she kissed his zipper. "That's an understatement. I loved it when you called me Admiral Reed while you wore your dress blues. Speaking of which... I haven't seen them recently."
"Special occasions, Baby. Can't wear them every day," he told her, and she made a disappointed sound as he took one step away from her.
"Where are you going? I was about to give you a blowjob."
To her knowledge, Jake had never turned her down. Ever. Not once in over ten months with him. She sat still on the couch and watched him rake his fingers a bit nervously through his hair. The more she looked at him, the more she realized he didn't quite seem like himself, and she hopped up from the couch and went to him. 
"You can tell me what's wrong, Jake," she promised softly. "Did I do something?"
"No," he replied with conviction. "You didn't do a damn thing wrong, Baby. I've just had something on my mind."
"Oh." She was trying to think of a single positive thing that would get this reaction out of him, but she could only come up with negatives. Her mind was supplying scenarios that would be enough to break her heart as he studied her with pensive green eyes.
"I really like that," he muttered, gaze falling to the floor. "When you kind of... take control." His face was flushed a pretty shade of pink, and Jessica couldn't stop staring. He was so obviously nervous, and he didn't meet her eyes until she pressed her palm to his warm cheek. "I like it when you do that."
"Okay," she replied with a little nod. "Then I'll do it more often."
He huffed out an exasperated breath and looked up at the ceiling now. "Jessica... I've never asked for anything like this before. And I don't really know how to do it now."
She used both hands to tip his face down again so he was looking at her once more. His pupils were wide, and his lips were set in a firm line, and she had no idea what was running through his mind that was making him react this way. "You can tell me anything, Jake. You can ask for what you want. I do it all the time. I ask you to buy me lingerie and toys, and you always do."
"This is different," came his immediate response. "I don't know if you'll like it. Hell, I don't even know if I'll like it."
She scraped her nails gently along his stubble and tried to imagine what he wanted. She'd give him anything. "Is it something kinky?" she asked, tracing his lip as he nodded. "You're just going to have to tell me then, and I promise I'll at least consider it."
Jake seemed to be gathering his thoughts as her hand drifted down his neck to his shirt where she slowly traced the letters in SERESIN over and over again until he whispered, "Okay. Baby, you know how we bought all those toys from that one website?" When she nodded, he added, "And you know how we kind of skipped the one category?"
She could picture the night they were curled up on the couch with her phone, adding things to the shopping cart with reckless abandon until they'd spent over five hundred dollars. She could also clearly picture the collection of dildos and straps that were available that they didn't touch at all. 
"Oh."
He swallowed hard, his eyes growing wide as he started to pull away from her. "Yeah."
But Jessica wrapped her arms around his neck and held him tighter against her body. He was getting a little hard, and then she whispered, "You want me fuck you like that? With a strap-on?"
She really didn't even need the verbal confirmation, not with the way his body reacted and the soft moan that came from the back of his throat. But she kissed him as soon as he said, "Yes."
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Jake was waiting for things to shift. He was bracing himself for Jessica to look at him differently or change her mind. There was a difference between wants and needs, and he knew that. He wanted to experiment with her, because he trusted her. She brought out emotions he'd never felt before which opened them up to some exciting exploration in the bedroom. He was nervous to tell her what he wanted, but he did it anyway. 
But what he needed was for Jessica to say yes when he proposed on vacation in Cabo with the three carat diamond ring he bought. He needed her to say she'd spend the rest of her life with him before they went to Texas for Christmas. But if it were possible for someone to fulfill all of his needs and his wants too, it was Jessica. It was always going to be Jessica.
So he was surprised but not unpleasantly so when after dinner, she stretched out on the couch with her head on his thigh and brought the topic back to the items she mentioned earlier. She looked up at him and said, "We should make sure you're happy with what we pick, but there are a lot of options. And I guess if we buy something and you don't like it, we could always try again?"
"I love you," he whispered, now knowing he hadn't done anything to change the way she felt about him. She smiled softly as he ran his fingers through her hair.
"I love you, too," she promised. "And I'm really excited about this."
Jake sighed in relief. "If you don't think it's fun, we definitely don't need to try it a second time." But she was already pointing out a few different dildos that she found on her phone and holding it up for him to see.
"Oh, Jake," she said with a grin that made him pulse with need. "I'm pretty sure I'm going to have a great time. And this one comes in navy blue... I'm just saying, it would match your uniforms perfectly."
That comment alone left Jake in a state of constant need for the next week while he waited for the goods to arrive. The box was dropped off the following Friday, and Jessica was wearing his robe and smiling like the cat who got the cream when he got home from work. "How was your last day of the semester, Dr. Reed?" he asked softly as she held up the pink box.
"It was good," she replied easily. "And it's about to get even better. We leave for Cabo in the morning, and the new toys are here."
Jake swallowed hard as she handed him the box, and when she untied his robe sash, he was treated to the sight of her in her navy blue lace bra and thong set. "Jessica," he croaked, already turned on and beyond excited. 
"Look in the box," she told him, and he realized she had already cut it open. Everything was the same blue color as her lingerie, and he moaned softly when he ran his hand along the smaller of the two dildos. He didn't know if this would feel good or not, but the idea of his girlfriend wearing it was making him hard. 
He met her eyes as she said, "If it looks good to you, I'll clean everything and get ready while you change into your dress blues."
"My dress blues?" he asked as she took the box from him. 
She bit her lip and moaned. "Do it, Lieutenant Seresin. Put on your dress blues and wait for me in the bedroom."
"Yes, ma'am," he grunted, heading right for the closet without delay. His hands shook slightly as he pulled his uniform from the hanger. He was so excited, he could barely get the tie on himself. He looked at the shoes. Would she want him to wear the shoes? Did he want to skip them and hope for a reprimand? Would she reward him more if he was wearing the full uniform?
He ended up putting them on, and when Jessica walked into the bedroom, he was standing at attention. But his jaw dropped when he saw that she was already wearing the strap-on. No sound came out, but he was gasping for air as she ran her hand up and down the length, casually strolling closer to him. 
"This looks good on you, Lieutenant," she purred, and his cock stirred a little more. "I like it when you're dressed for the occasion."
"What's the occasion, Admiral Reed?"
She took his hand in hers and turned the palm up, and then she squeezed out some lube. Then she guided his hand to the dildo, and he helped her coat it up. "You're the one who told me this uniform is just for special occasions, so I'll make it a very special one for you. I'm going to fuck you in the ass until you come."
Jake gasped, his hand tightening around the length, pulling Jessica closer to him. "Please," he whimpered, and she adjusted his hat on his head with her clean hand. 
"I can't guarantee this will stay on," she mused, grabbing him by the bicep and turning him so he was facing the bed. Her hands came to rest on his hips from behind, and the toy poked him as she said, "And these definitely won't be staying on." 
She reached around and started to undo the front of his pants. This was his Jessica. This was the self assured, beautiful woman of his dreams, and she started jerking him off as his pants fell to the floor. The strap on was rubbing his backside. He could come simply from this.
"Bend over, Lieutenant," she demanded, squeezing his cock with her slick hand before releasing him. He did as he was told, and when his cheek met the bedding, her hands met his ass. "Don't forget, Jake," she said softly. "If you're not enjoying it, the safe word is Sam Adams."
"Thank you, Baby," he whispered, actually feeling a lot more at ease than he imagined. And that's precisely when Jessica's hand landed on his ass with a hard slap. 
"Lieutenant Seresin," she barked out. "Your uniform is sloppy. Your pants are on the floor. I have told you so many times to straighten this out!"
"Yes Admiral Reed, ma'am," he replied, his voice shaking with need as his cock twitched against the bed. "I'll do better next time."
She laughed, and Jake could hear her uncap the bottle of lube just before he felt her squeeze it onto his backside near where she spanked him. "You need to be taught a lesson. Or you'll keep strutting around here like the rules don't apply to you."
"Yes, ma'am," he gasped as her fingers slid through the slick mess before easing from his balls right up to his asshole. He was already bucking back against her fingers as she teased him, and he'd never been more aware of the fact that he'd never had anything inside him before. 
He looked back at her over his shoulder, his blue jacket all bunched up on his body along with his shirt and tie. When she met his eyes, she smirked and said, "Relax, Lieutenant. Be a good boy. It will all be over soon."
The words Sam Adams were right there on his tongue, and he was ready to shout them out, but he found himself relaxing at her touch as she eased her fingertip along while she whispered, "Just be a good boy."
He grunted at the stretch, because it felt incredible. "Admiral Reed," he whined as she inserted her finger deeper. God, he'd wanted this in the worst way, and it felt so fucking good. Her other hand rubbed circles along his lower back, and when he pressed his hips back for more of her finger, she started to withdraw it instead.
"You want more," she whispered, a statement rather than a question. She could tell he did, but he nodded against the bedding and told her yes. Then her finger was back, slipping inside him as he took fistfuls of the blankets. This was different than he usually felt when they were intimate. Not better or worse, but a different kind of pleasurable. She was easily gliding along a spot inside him that left him a little short of breath, groaning her name.
After long enough that his cock was starting to ache for relief, she said, "I think you're ready for the strap, Lieutenant. And I can't wait to give it to you."
He knew she would be gentle amidst the roleplay, and she was. Jake could feel her coating him up with more lube before she leaned down and kissed his back through his uniform. Then she eased the blunt silicone head to his hole and swirled it around while he did his best to try to relax. Jessica's other hand wrapped around to his cock which was devastatingly hard, and she started to slowly jerk him off again while she pushed. 
If the stretch from her finger felt good, the stretch from the strap felt both incredible and also alarming. He was gasping, knuckles white as he clutched the bedding. Jessica pushed deeper and deeper, still stroking her hand along his cock as she filled his ass completely. Her hips were resting against him as he moaned and whined loudly. 
He squeezed his eyes closed, sucking in air as she paused, fully seated. "How does that feel, Lieutenant Seresin?" she asked, voice breathy as she kissed along his back again. 
Jake tried to find the words to describe the juxtaposition of pleasure mixed with slight pain along with the thrumming desire for more. More of Jessica's voice, more movement, and more pressure. "I like it," he managed, and that was all she needed to hear.
Inch by beautiful inch, she withdrew until that blunt tip was the only thing inside him, and Jake moaned loudly as she thrusted into him faster this time while his body grabbed at the length. "Oh god," he whined when he was full again. "Feels amazing."
She slid her slick hand along his cock and whispered, "You're my good boy," while she fucked him. "You're doing great." She rolled her hips, fucking him with rapid, shallow thrusts while he grunted her name and balled the bedding up tighter. She stroked his length slower as her hips went faster, and Jake's hands shook with anticipation. 
"Baby," he moaned as her hips pressed against his ass, holding herself in place as she filled him completely. 
"Admiral Reed," she corrected, letting her hand drift slowly back down his shaft so she was squeezing his balls. She rolled her hips back and snapped them forward in one fluid motion, and Jake buried his face in the bedding as he cried out. 
"Admiral Reed! I'm close! I'm so close!"
Without slowing her tempo, Jessica grabbed him by his hips, and Jake's cock pressed against the bed. She was rubbing him in all the right places, keeping him full with thrust after thrust, and his cock was throbbing in need. 
"Come, Lieutenant. You earned it," she promised, grabbing at his hips and waist and grunting as she finished him off with all of her remaining strength. Just a few more thrusts as she found every spot inside of him that needed relief, and he was coming all over the bed.
"Fuck!" he growled, lifting his upper body slightly to chase that perfect pressure, and he watched his cum shoot across the bedding as Jessica rubbed his electrified skin. Jake collapsed back down onto his own mess, the sticky warmth on his hands and cheek as he whined and whimpered. 
He felt Jessica remove the strap one inch at a time until she was free of his body, and she hugged him from behind, kissing at his shoulder. "I love you, Jake. I love you so much," she crooned breathlessly, and he at least had the wherewithal to realize she might need some relief now as well. But he couldn't stand up yet. Not when she was whispering the sweetest things in his ear while his legs shook.
When he lifted his head, she kissed his cheek while he tried to formulate words. Then she moaned and licked the cum from his face. Nothing had changed. She was still his in the same way she had been, and if anything, he loved her more for what she just did with him. 
"Jessica," he whispered, kissing her lips, finally. She tasted like him. She tasted perfect. Then he stood, and she was smiling up at him, wearing that pretty strap. And Jake knew. He fucking knew damn well that it was time to ask her. 
"Where are you going?" she asked when he reached for his pants, pulling them up high enough so he could walk. 
He rushed out to the kitchen and opened the cabinet that contained all of the spices and seasonings. She was still apprehensive about cooking on her own, and this was the last place she would have looked for anything. He grabbed the small box and popped it open as he ran back into the bedroom as quickly as he could. Jessica had removed the strap and set it on the bed, leaving her in that sinful looking navy blue set. She adjusted her glasses just before her gaze fell to his hand, and then he dropped to his knee in front of her.
"Jake?" she gasped as her eyes went wide.
"Marry me. Please, Baby. Marry me. You're a need. A necessity. But you're also somehow the only thing I want. I was going to propose in Cabo, but I can't even wait until tomorrow. Will you marry me?"
Her pretty face crumpled as she sobbed, but she was nodding and reaching for him. Her voice shook as she smiled through her tears. "Yes. I'll marry you. You're my needs and wants, too."
Jake stood and scooped her up as he laughed. She ended up beneath him on the bed next to his cum, kissing him and running her fingers through his hair while he tried to get her to hold her hand still. "Let me put it on you, Smart Girl," he whispered, unable to stop smiling as he took her left hand and slipped the ring into place. He loved the way it looked. And then, as if the massive diamond didn't matter much to her in comparison to him, she had her hands back in his hair. And he kind of loved that, too.
"I can't wait to tell everyone how we got engaged," she said as she laughed and buried her face against his neck. 
"You can tell them anything you want, Jess. Just make sure you pack that strap for Cabo along with the rest of the toys."
---------------------------
Thank you so much for coming on this little journey with me! It was really fun to fit Jake and Jessica into the Beer Boy and Sugar universe, and I hope you'll stick around to read about Bob and Anna soon, too! IYKYK...if you follow along with Beer Boy and Sugar, you already knew about Jake and Jessica's upcoming nuptials. More surprises are in store in every corner of this universe soon! Big thanks to @mak-32 @beyondthesefourwalls @sylviebell for all your help!
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yestrnight · 8 months
Note
hiiiii!! if you do sub readers, can you do a sub ditzy/dumb slime reader who gets fucked by kaveh and alhaitham? if you don’t wanna you don’t have to, but thanks for reading this!! nd i really loved the other slime reader fics!!
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˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ACTIN' LIKE A DAMN HYPOCRITE !
FROM: kaveh / gn! slime! reader / haitham
SUBJECT: you did something wrong and now you're fucked. literally. except i did not do the request and it became kaveh and haitham fighting over you while you get plowed and haitham's a hypocrite the entire time.
( gn reader but they have a CÙNT, seeex, idk this is pretty tame bois )
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no matter how endearing you are— all of your gurgly-voiced, innocent-eyed adorableness— one cannot just let you roam free without some sort of discipline. after all, who knows what you're capable of? you're a humanoid slime that kaveh picked out of nowhere, that alone should raise some bells, and plus the fact that you were sucking the living soul out of their dicks every day should warrant you a damn collar.
alhaitham raises his brow at his roommate, who coddles and coos at you in your slime form. "this is why the pesky thing keeps thrashing our room. you spoil them too much."
kaveh stops babbling to you in baby-talk just to shoot his roommate a glare. "oh, shush you. even if they look like a human, they're still a slime through and through. it can't be helped that they'll be a little rowdy every now and then. it's part of their nature!"
"if their nature is going to cost me 10,000 mora for renovation, then it becomes quite the inconvenience for me, i'm afraid," haitham deadpans, shutting his book and leveling his senior with a stern stare. "as the one who found them, do you even have the means to get that money right now?"
kaveh winces. "well, i... i'll manage somehow. somehow." his tone becomes pitiful at the end. finally realizing that he has to teach his little pet some manners so that they won't keep bankrupting him, he turns you around and tries to muster the harshest glare that he can. you notice that the situation has become serious, and in his hands you slowly morph into your humanoid form as you tilt your head innocently.
"kav... eh?" you gurgle in questioning, wide innocent eyes looking up at him. "did i do something wrong?"
"yes, dear," he starts, and he reddens when he notices haitham's amused expression from the corner of his eye. "that was very naughty of you, to destroy haitham's study while we were away. we... i..." he heaves a breath, wincing as he continues to speak. "we need to punish you. you've been a very bad slime."
"we?" haitham cocks a brow.
"oh come on!" kaveh groans. "i know you want in too!"
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he's not wrong about that. not when haitham's deep groans sound throughout the room as he's fucking your wet pussy like his life depended on it. it was nice, to be the one fucking instead of being fucked. he still had his pride after all, even if you had stripped him of it countless of times before.
he pinches your clit as he grinds his cock deep into your cunt. you let out a squeal, a cross between surprise and pleasure as you start leaking more and more slime around his cock. he's always been a petty jerk, and it's become more obvious when he relishes in the cloudy expression on your usually clueless face. the face of his dreams and nightmares, staring down at him as he drowns in his own shameless pleasure as if they haven't stripped him of all his dignity.
he swipes a thumb across your lip— relishes it when you shiver in pleasure from his touch— and dips it into your mouth. "this is how you ought to look like everyday," he says, serious eyes studying your face as you whimper and suck on his thumb. "brainless monsters like you should just sit still and submit like a good pet."
"don't be so mean!" kaveh admonishes his roommate, giving him the side eye as if he's not sat behind you and torturing your chest with those delicate fingers. "we're just disciplining them. you don't have to demean them like that!"
haitham shoots him a glare and kaveh, not one to back down from haitham, glares right back. "you don't have the right to talk, " he spits, glaring moodily down at your fucked expression. "you brought this one into our home and allowed it to destroy both of our lives."
"oh please," kaveh sneers. in his aggravation, he pinches your perky nipples so hard that you let out a small sob as he abuses them. "destroy? more like destroying your ass." his smirk widens when haitham blushes angrily. "we both know that after your done plowing my cute lil [y. name] you're going back to taking their dick in your ass."
haitham clicks his tongue, venting his frustration by rutting too deep into you. he's close, kaveh can see it, if the white liquid leaking from his head and floating in your slme torso was any indication. "as if you don't do that either," haitham snaps.
"well, i'm not a bitch about it," kaveh scoffs.
"you act like damn slut when it comes to [y. name]."
you rock up and down against kaveh while you whine and moan from haitham's rough handling. kaveh pecks a loving kiss on your cheek, snuggling into your neck, and you whine back as you try to find his lips again. kaveh grins at haitham.
"better than acting like you don't get bitched everyday."
haitham growls, but says nothing more. once he's done turning your body into his creamy white, he's coming after kaveh.
743 notes · View notes
enapoe · 6 months
Text
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ᨳ hypocrite
synopsis - y/n's brother is a star soccer player — which is why she refuses to date athletes. (like she dates anyone). But when she's put in charge of the sports section in the school newspaper, she coincidentally makes the star player fall for her.
genre - soccerplayer!hoon × nerdy/writer!reader. FLUFF what is angst? we don't know her. hoon's a rich boy, yn has a famous big bro 🙄 cliché nerd catches athletes eye whatever, whatever
warnings - kiss kiss (duh) lmk if I missed any o(^o^)o
word count - 434
A/N - this story is a lot of my imagination, but after some digging I think @/eeunoia has jungwon fic (Attention Please! Mini series) similar in the sense that both female leads write about the sports team. So before people say I'm not crediting them or stealing their work here I am saying that both our stories have this one thing in common. (Also also, they're a very amazing writer and their stories are adorable and heart fluttering)
PART 2 here !
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The library was your favorite place in the entire city.
Something about the smell of books and coffee that ligures through the book shelves is both comforting and slightly concerning. The library has seen better days but a fair amount of students still come in everyday to study. Sometimes — if you're lucky — people come in for dates, you love people watching, but watching two young people fall in love is S tier. Romance is your favorite genre; books, movies, anything that makes you red in the face and butterflies appear in your stomach.
Even after many failed relationships back in middle school, (don't ask, it was mainly teenage boys filled with uncontrolled hormones) you haven't given dating a second chance. Romance and love was like biting into a creme filled donut—or even better, homemade soup on a cold winter day—it wasn't what your brother said romance is at all.
He's the best brother you could ever ask for, yet his dating life is one of pure nightmares. It seems like everyday Dispatch has a new article about him. He's never brought a girl home, which means he's never been with a girl for longer than one night.
Since his love life consists of picking up a girl and dropping them the next day, you've always told yourself: you will never date an athlete. Yes, in fear they'll use you, but also because you're scared they'd only like you if they find out about your brother.
Whilst in your internal monologue, you didn't notice someone walking up to you.
“Um, excuse me? Do you work here?” you turned and were met with someone's chest. Damn. You looked up and saw the eyes of the one and only star player of the soccer (football) team.
“Oh! Yes, I work here. Can I help you with anything?” Sunghoon found your appearance cute. Not like the ‘I'd date you’ cute but maybe like a newborn puppy type. You wore a baggy beige crew neck and a pair of acid wash jeans, with your hair down and straightened. “I need this book called ‘To Kill a Mockingbird’, do you guys have it here?” After a second of silence, you nodded and led him to the mature reading section of the library.
“Thanks for the help…” you think he's asking for your name. “Y/n, Go Y/n” you giggle like a middle schooler and hate youself for it after. “I'll see you around Go Y/n.” He puts the book in his bag and stops before turning back towards you.
“I'm supposed to check this out, aren't I?”
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424 notes · View notes
Note
Emily's shoulder Charlie: "There is still good in Sera. Her intentions have been horridly corrupted, but they once came from a desire to protect and preserve. We can help her see the truth and return to goodness!"
Emily's shoulder Vaggie: "PUNCH HER IN HER STUCK-UP ANGEL FACE!"
XD chaggie down in hell having a rest after the drama, meanwhile EMILY-
Emily: "I'm not sure the face punching idea would even work. Sera's too tall..."
Shoulder Vaggie: "Trust me, she's sunk low enough for you to reach."
Shoulder Charlie: "Which MEANS she's ALSO in the perfect position for HUGS!!!"
Emily: "I don't even know how to throw a punch."
Shoulder Charlie: "And that's fine!!"
Shoulder Vaggie: "No problem. Just think about that that time you found out souls were being permanently wiped from existence once a year in the name of protecting heaven bc Sera was scared people might not actually like being damned and tortured for all eternity and figured just letting Adam murder them was the best way to keep sinners away from the pearly gates. Not that you needed to know any of that, though. It was fine if you sat happily up on your cloud, far above the mountain of dead bodies piled up to keep it safe."
Shoulder Charlie: "....We could punch her a little, maybe."
Emily: "Charlie!"
Shoulder Charlie: "I'm sorry! You think Vaggie's making a REALY good point, is the thing!"
Emily: "Why do my hands suddenly hurt-?"
Shoulder Vaggie: "It's called clenching your fists. You're making a fist with your hands for the first time ever. Good job. Don't tuck your thumb though."
Emily: (untucks thumb) "I still can't just punch Sera. It wouldn't make anything better!"
Shoulder Charlie: "We could call it a, uh, direct demonstration of our opinions on the matter. Or a lived example of why violence is bad!"
Emily: "You're not supposed to be arguing for punching!"
Shoulder Charlie: "I said I'm sorry! But the only time you met me, the real me, I spent the end of the day burning with rage and yelling at people about it! And it's my girlfriend you've got advocating for the face punching- I can't help that you think I'd be kinda down for it!!"
Shoulder Vaggie: "The whole dating me thing is a pretty big clue she's at least not turn off by violence, if it's for helping people instead of, y'know. Murder."
Emily: "Vaggie- help me. The real you was more quiet and cautious-"
Shoulder Vaggie: "Probably because of the blackmail."
Emily: "-you, you tried telling Charlie to keep a cool head! Tell me that too!"
Shoulder Vaggie: "Remember that thing where it turns out real me used to be an exorcist, used to do that murder stuff? And got left behind in hell? Probably for the whole not liking the murder thing?"
Emily: "I was trying not to remember that..."
Shoulder Vaggie: "You're not a princess of hell or a lowly ex-exorcist. You're a seraphim. You could punch Sera and get away with it."
Emily: "Ugh.."
Shoulder Charlie: "But only a LITTLE punch, okay? Gently. Gently punch."
Shoulder Vaggie: "That's not how it works babe but sweeet thought."
Emily: (SIGHS) (stops arguing internally with herself)
Sera: "....."
Sera: "Are you alright, Emily."
Emily: (despondent) "I'm fine, Sera."
Sera: "You seem a bit, droopy. I haven't even had proper glimpse of your face all day."
Emily: "Sorry. I just can't look at you right now."
Sera: (devastated) "...oh."
Sera: (rallying) "Well it will pass in time, I'm sure. Once you understand things better."
Emily: (hiding fists in skirts) (urge to punch) (RISING) "SuRE."
Emily: "..."
Emily: "Oh you know what? We haven't talked about Sir Pentious today!"
Sera: "Haven't we."
Emily: "We haven't, actually!" (smugly smooths out skirts) "He's settling in here nicely, isn't he? Isn't it wonderful having a new angel in heaven? Seeing him around, so amazed at everything- being so sweet and kind as he finds his way around after dying to protect his friends- Isn't it such an extra blessing, that he made it here aaaaallllll the way from hell? Aren't we lucky Charlie and Vaggie's hotel for reforming sinners is a thing? And is STILL a thing, even after Adam and Lute tried killing them all? On our orders? Which- thank heaven!- didn't work?"
Sera: (eye twitch) (eye twitch) "Indeed."
Emily: "I'm sure they'd be SO happy to see how well Sir Pentious is doing." (beaming) "We should invite them back sometime!"
Sera: (Glowering) "....."
Emily: "See I knew you'd agree Sera. You're overprotective- but that doesn't make you vindictive and petty, right? Right. You're not like Adam, may he rest in peace- Now, about setting something up to help the transition go more smoothly, the next time a sinner earns their place in heaven..."
-down in hell-
Vaggie: "You've got a great frown line going on, sweetie. What's up?"
Charlie: "Oh it's silly, but...
Charlie: "...Is Emily going to be okay up in heaven, do you think? After finding out about. Y'know."
Vaggie: "If she's anything like you? No."
Charlie: (whimpers) (frown x2)
Vaggie: "But if she's half as brilliant as you are, then she'll figure something out."
Charlie: "If she's so much like me, then she's also a Charlie without her Vaggie. That's not much of a Charlie."
Vaggie: "You did fine in Cannibal Town alone, babe."
Charlie: "Only AFTER thinking about you!"
Vaggie: "Well- uhh-" (tries not to smile) (smiles a lot) "Sir Pentious is up there? He counts for something."
Charlie & Vaggie: (stare up at heaven)
Charlie: "....think he's already blown up the pearly gates?"
Vaggie: "If his Egg Boiz haven't shown up there yet? Yeah. Probably."
-pearly gates-
Sir Pentious: (clinging to the wreckage of the gates) "THEY ARE VERY SSSSIMPLE BOIZ! THEY MIGHT NOT REMMBER HOW TO KNOCK OR CONSSTRUCT AND EXSSSSPLOSSIVE POWERFUL ENOUGH TO GET THEM PASSSSSST IT!"
Sera: "That is why we have Peter keeping WATCH on the gates! We do NOT detonate the gates of heaven with several tons of TNT- singeing Peter's wings in process!"
St. Peter: (coughs smoke) "Ow~"
Sir Pentious: "BUT THEY ARE SSSSSMALL! WHAT IF THEY GET OVERLOOKED? MY BOIZSS!!"
Emily: "We could just leave the gates open-"
Sera: "NO!"
Emily: (leaning in to pentious) (whispering) "I'll leave the gates open an Egg Boi sized gap okay? Don't worry."
224 notes · View notes
eddie-van-munson · 2 years
Text
Peanut Butter Cookies (Eddie Munson x Reader)
***********
Requested by @cupcake-de-abacaxi
Summary: The reader gets jealous when she meets a friend of Eddie's: a gorgeous, smart metalhead that's infuriatingly perfect for him. Little do you know, he's not interested in this 'friend' in the very least.
Warnings: Cursing, Drug use (Weed), Jealousy, Saucy Kisses, Implied Sex, Slight Angst (Happy Ending), Fluff.
(I will get a "Read More" cut on this ASAP. Requests are OPEN.)
***********
Her name was Juliet. How the hell were you supposed to compete with that? Fucking Juliet.
That was the most romantic, gothic, wicked ass name you'd ever heard.
She had thick black curls and glossy lips, painted dark and curved like a doll's. She wore a dense chain around her perfect porcelain neck and tall, studded boots.
You couldn't have found someone more suited to Eddie if you had drawn her yourself, but there she was. Draped across his living room couch.
"Who's this, Eds?" She cooed, as you wandered into the trailer. Your stomach churned. Eds. Only you and Wayne were allowed to call him that.
"Huh?" He glanced over from the kitchen where he was rolling a joint. "Oh! This is Y/N. She's mine. You'll love her."
She waved at you, smiling. You waved back shyly, slightly comforted by the phrase "she's mine" even though you knew what he meant was "she's with me".
"I'm Juliet." She sounded friendly enough. "Brownie?"
She held out a tray brownies, which were definitely edibles, and patted the couch beside her. You politely declined, but sat down, fidgeting with your hair.
"Oh god, Eds." She giggled, blushing as she covered her face with her brownie-free hand. "Do you remember the last time we made treats?"
Eddie grinned, smoke pluming from his lips when he laughed. It seemed he'd gotten the  joint lit. "Jesus, I'd forgotten about that. We both ate one and thought they didn't work-"
"So we both had two more!"
"Holy shit. I thought the damn ceiling was talking to me."
Juliet laughed, wiping a tear from her large, shockingly blue eyes. "I thought Wayne was going to kill us!"
Jealousy boiled in your stomach. Wayne. She knew Wayne now too, apparently. And she and "Eds" had made "treats" together before.
Juliet sighed, polishing off her brownie. "Oh shit! I have something for you, Eds! I'd completely forgot! Let me grab it!"
Eddie chuckled as he sat beside you, "God, I've missed her." He sighed. "I haven't seen her in years. She said this time she might stay."
"S-Stay? In Hawkins?" Your heart stopped for a minute.
"Yeah! Isn't that amazing!"
You nodded, trying to save face for him. He was grinning ear to ear, and your heart hurt the more you admired him. 
Juliet was back to quickly for your liking, holding a paper shopping bag. "For you..."
"Wait!? You bought me something?" Eddie's eyes went big.
"Just open it, silly!"
He gracelessly pulled the item from the bag. A brand new cassette. "Holy shit, is this?"
She grinned, nodding.
"Master of Puppets? This came out like, two days ago! How the hell did you?? Jules!!" He jumped up off the couch, pulling her into a hug as she giggled. "God, you're the best!"
Again your stomach churned, but this time from the feeling of being left out. You'd never been a metal head. Sure, there were a few songs you knew...a few you'd liked. And you loved hearing Eddie ramble about his favorite songs and bands, but it just wasn't your style.
Just the same, you had known Metallica was coming out with a new album. He'd mentioned it offhandedly about a week ago. You'd been saving up to try and get it for him for his birthday.
"Oh man, I've been dying to hear this. You have no idea."
Juliet grinned, "Pop it in!"
He headed for his player, but paused. "Nah. You know what? Let's save it. It's not really Y/N's thing."
Your heart sank with guilt.
"Oh man, really?" Juliet didn't sound judgemental, just surprised, but it still made your jaw clench a little. "I started dabbling in Black Sabbath a few years ago. I've never gone back."
Eddie laughed, "She knows fucking everything about this shit, Y/N. Any band, any song, any album, and she could give you the whole deal."
You gave a weak smile, nodding.
"Christ, it's so good to talk to someone who listens to actual music Eds. All my friends back home just listen to the fucking Beatles. You know, all the slow, sweet shit."
You loved the Beatles.
Eddie shot you an apologetic look, his eyes trailing to the little tin you'd brought with you. "What did you bring, N/N?"
"Is it speed?" Juliet gasped happily.
"Oh no...it's...um...Peanut Butter cookies."
Your mom loved Eddie. He was over at your house often, and everytime he was, he went on and on about her cooking.
This is good shit, Mrs. L/N.
They don't make 'em like you anymore, Mrs. L/N.
Damn, Mrs. L/N! You keep this up and you'll have me looking like the Philsbury dough boy!
 He buttered her up like a slice of fucking toast. Hence, now everytime you went over to Eddie's, your mom sent the whole damn kitchen with you. Eddie didn't mind at all. Actually, you knew for a fact that was what kept him coasting when Wayne worked late. But for some reason, this time, you were mortified. Thank god you'd managed to talk her down to just the cookies.
"Oh!" Juliet said, her voice sweet, but still a little uncomfortable.
"M-My mom sent them for Eddie."
She frowned a little, "Peanut Butter Cookies? Eds, I thought you had a peanut allergy?"
Eddie's cheeks went a little pink. He scratched his neck, "Oh, well...it's just a minor one, really. It's not a big deal."
"What?" You'd known Eddie for years now. Literal, actual years. Never once had he ever mentioned a peanut allergy. "You never told me."
"It just...never came up." He shrugged.
Why were you angry at him? Why did you want to yell?
"Eddie, mom has sent over granola, before. Granola with peanuts."
His eyes were wide, "And Wayne loved it! It was great!"
"That's not the point!" You said a little too loudly, tears welling in your eyes. You stood from the couch, throwing your bag over your shoulder.
"Where are you going?" His voice was so soft. He sounded hurt.
"Nowhere. I'm sorry I'm just...tired or something."
He frowned, "Don't leave."
Your heart sank as you dug the tin from your bag, setting it on the counter. "It's alright, Eds. I'm alright. I'll catch up with you later ok? I promise."
You turned to Juliet, who was looking a bit bewildered where she was sitting on the couch.
"It was nice meeting you."
And with that, you shut the door behind you.
***********
You were in tears by the time you got home, mad at yourself for making such a stupid scene over his stupid peanut allergy, of all things. Juliet probably thought you'd lost it.
You put on a Beatles tape, completely out of spite, and crawled into bed with your clothes still on. Hot tears rolled down your cheeks.
How dare she. How dare she swoop in and be beautiful and perfect for him. And know every little detail about him on top of that. How dare she like metal and wear edgy clothes when you didn't. How dare she be endearing enough for him to give her a nickname. How dare she.
You'd cried until what little makeup you had on had stained your pillow case, and then you cried some more, because that was your softest one.
You flipped your pillow to the dry side, chest aching with sadness, and promptly fell asleep.
***********
You woke up to the feeling of the bed dipping. A warm, familiar smell enveloped you as you felt your covers being tucked in around your body. A fingertip grazed over your forehead, brushing baby hairs back from your face.
A soft voice sang along to your tape.
Making each day of the year... Changing my life with a wave of her hand... Nobody can deny that there's something there.
His hand cradled your face, grazing back and forth over your cheek lovingly.
Running my hands through her hair... Both of us thinking how good it can be... Someone is speaking, but she doesn't know he's there.
Your eyes fluttered, and you knew you had to be dreaming as a pair of big brown eyes came into focus.
"Hey, baby."
His thumb swiped at the trace of mascara left beneath your eyes and your nose scrunched, making him smile.
"H-...How do you know it?" You slurred, still half asleep.
"Know what, sweetheart?"
"The song." You whined, pitifully.
He gave a soft chuckle, "Because I like this song."
"No you don't."
"Yes I do."
"No you-"
"Jesus, how are you this stubborn when you're half asleep?"
You made a face, which immediately melted away when he continued petting your hair lovingly.
"I like this song..." He held your gaze, stubbornly. "Because it reminds me of you ."
You stared back at him, brow softening. 
He smiled, "What can I say? I guess sometimes I'm into the slow, sweet shit."
Tears welled in your eyes, and you immediately covered them so he couldn't see. Your voice trembled ridiculously with tears. "Why didn't you tell me you had a peanut allergy?"
 "Aw baby..." He chuckled sweetly, pressing a kiss to your temple. "I'm so sorry I didn't tell you."
You gave a pitiful laugh through your tears, letting him move your hand away to see your red, puffy, makeup stained eyes.
"God, look at you." He giggles softly, brushing his thumb beneath your ringed eyes again. "You're a raccoon." You rolled your eyes and he laughed, admiring you for a moment. "Do you forgive me?"
You nod, pulling him down into a hug. "Do you forgive me?"
"Nothing to forgive, princess."
You frown a little, pulling back to see his face. "Yes there is. I got angry and jealous."
He hums sweetly, "Well in that case, you're forgiven." You comb through his curls, tenderly. "I wouldn't worry about Juliet either, ok? You've got nothing to be jealous about."
"No Eds, I..." You took a deep breath, mustering your courage. "I want you guys to be together."
He quirked his brow, laying back on your bed and propping an arm behind his head. "Yeah? Why's that?"
You rest your chin on his chest, "Because you're perfect for each other. She likes the same music and she dresses like you and she knows so much about metal..."
He rubs a hand up and down the small of your back looking amused. "I don't think things are gonna work out between me and Juliet, babe."
You frown, "W-Why not?"
He smiles, "Well, I know I'm pretty backwards sweetheart, but as far as I know, it tends to be frowned upon to have a good 'round in the sheets' with your cousin."
You froze, a shit eating grin on Eddie's face.
"Cousin?"
He nods slowly, "That's right. Juliet Munson."
You were still processing, "Juliet Mun-..."
"Wayne's daughter. She lived with her mom. Came back down to visit now that she's over eighteen."
Juliet Munson. Eddie's...cousin. Christ.
You buried your head in his chest and he burst into bright, clear laughter.
"Eddieeee."
He brought a hand to his face, gathering tears from his eyes as he tried to steady out his giggles.
You gave him an embarrassed look, "You're never going to let me live this down, are you?"
"Never in a million years, Princess."
You were holding back laughter now too. You sat up, giving him a playful shove. " Well, I don't think it's funny, Eddie Munson. You-"
"Oh, Com'ere you."
He grabbed the collar of your shirt, pulling you down into a messy, needy kiss. You straddled him, letting his hands slide up over your neck to cradle your face. He sat up on his elbows, chasing your lips when you moved.  His breath was heavy and hot as he hummed against you, "You...didn't have any...of those cookies did you?"
You tugged his curls in retaliation, making him give the most delicious whine. "No, asshole."
He chuckled as you gave him another tug, his head falling back so you could kiss down his throat. He cursed, grinding his hips.
"So the whole 'feeling like I can't breathe' thing and the lightheaded-ness...fuck...that's normal?"
"Yeah." You rasp, nipping at his collarbone. "I feel it too."
Eddie chuckled, pulling off his shirt, and you pulled back to admire him, tracing your fingertips over his tattoos.
He moaned, pressing up against your touch. "You have no idea what you do to me."
You chuckled softly, "Well as long as it doesn't involve me making you break out in hives..." You rocked your hips lightly, and his hands gripped your thighs. "I'm down to find out."
***********
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aestherin · 1 year
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privacy
34: one mistake
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When did it all start?
Ah, it was when he first heard your singing voice during eleventh grade.
It was the during the time of the day when most students would flock to the cafeteria, rushing to eat their fill after half a day's worth of academic torture. Even before then, he already disliked crowded and hectic places. And so, he went the opposite direction of everyone.
Turns out he wasn't the only one with that idea.
The sweet and enchanting voice of a nightingale was what welcomed him the moment he arrived at the school's courtyard. Not rushing to eat lunch just to hear this was worth it, he concluded.
He didn't even know your name at the time, for you two were not in the same class. And when you turned around — good lord.
Your face was beautiful, but it wasn't familiar at all. It was odd, how this was the first time he saw you. He thought for sure that with an appearance like that, if he had ever met you prior, he wouldn't be able to forget you.
Was the school really that big for you two to miss each other every single time?
"Oh. A person. Uhm, hi?"
Fuck. Even your speaking voice was attractive.
Kunikuzushi was damned.
And he has been, for many years. Even up until now.
The present him looked up at nowhere, quietly laughing at himself.
How pathetic.
'You've liked her since you were still students, and you still haven't got the guts to even confess.'
'You're both famous people now, hundreds of thousands of people — maybe even millions — wanting the two of you... yet you're still stuck simply being her friend.'
Boy best friend, he argued with himself. But Scaramouche himself also did not know if that was better or worse.
"I have arrived," he heard a smooth voice. Kunikuzushi instictively frowned. This? This was the voice of the man you fell for?
He almost rolled his eyes. He could do better than this guy in front of him. He bets Ayato couldn't even sing.
"Sit."
Ayato looked around the area but found no chairs. "Where?" All he could see was cemented grounds, ramps, and curves. Why did they have to meet at a deserted skateboarding area anyway?
Scaramouche smirked. "Ah, sorry. I forgot you're a rich boy. We can't have you sitting on the dirty floor now, could we?"
It was as if a tick mark appeared on the taller man's head. Feigning a smile, he breathed, "Did you ask to meet me just to insult me, bastard?"
"Wow. Was it that obvious?"
"No, not really."
"I'm just getting back at you."
"Pardon? I don't even know you, aside from you being a celebrity. This is the first time we've met and suddenly you say you're getting back at me?"
"Shut the fuck up. You insulted me first."
"Hah?"
"You getting together with [Name] so easily was the biggest insult I've ever received in my entire existence."
Oh.
Now, Ayato was no idiot. Of course, he immediately realized the underlying message of Scaramouche's statement. Was that why this man called for him? Did he receive news of their so-called 'break-up' and was now planning to tell him that he's going to pursue you now that you're not in a relationship anymore?
Ayato's eyes followed Scaramouche as he stood up from the metal rail he was previously sitting on. Meanwhile, the shorter one looked and turned away, seemingly looking at a distance.
"I knew it was all fake, by the way," he started. "She accidentally tweeted about it on her private account, and I got to see it before she deleted it."
"Since when?"
"That was even before your drama was released."
"That was a long time ago. You knew yet did nothing?"
Ayato was confused. If Scara had feelings for you, why didn't he act on it even after he found out that the thing you had for him was all a fraud? It was not something that he could comprehend.
Not with his way of thinking.
Kunikuzushi, on the other hand, begged to differ. He believed himself to have done the right thing.
He has already kept his affection for you to himself for several years, surely a few weeks, months more wouldn't be that big of a deal, right?
And so he stayed. Stayed observing, kept contemplating — remained being just a friend.
"Of course, the thought of having her for myself crossed my mind at that moment..." He smiled fondly. "...but I still didn't go with it."
He suddenly turned around, not giving Ayato the opportunity to retort.
"Because despite the fact that it wasn't real —"
Scaramouche sighed.
"— even the archons know how in love she was with you."
That left him speechless. For a seemingly inconsiderate and rough guy to say those words...
How can he remain calm? Another person who has romantic feelings for you just told him about your sincerest sentiments for him.
"Why are you —"
Ayato cut himself off with a forced gag.
"What the fuck?" He glared at the man who just punched his gut. He unconsciously hovered his arm over the pained area; though it wasn't too powerful, the sheer unexpectedness of the punch was enough to make it sting.
"Just because she loves you doesn't mean you get a pass. My anger won't vanish quickly, airhead."
Airhead?
Did... did he just insult me?
Me?
Yours truly?
This made Ayato raise a brow. "Oh?"
"Why not punch me in the face then? Scared?" Ayato challenged with a devious grin.
A sarcastic laugh was not what he was expecting in return.
"Are you dumb? With my strength, I am more than capable of landing a punch on your face that would take more than weeks to recover," Scaramouche smirked. "What if [Name] sees it? And her, being the angelic being she is, would ask you about it. Then you, being the conniving blabbermouth that you are, would tell her my name."
The fuck?
"She would be mad at me. That's the least thing I'd ever want."
"So that's why you punched me in an area that isn't visible."
"Precisely."
Ayato made a face. After a while, he attempted to get back at the other man with a punch too, but failed miserably. "Oh? Why are you hitting me back?"
"What kind of question even is that?"
"I thought you knew you deserved that punch in the gut," Kunikuzushi stated in a matter-of-fact tone, both hands inside his pockets. To Ayato, it seemed like the man in front of him was bigger than him at the moment. He was sneering down at him.
"You hurt her. So I punched you."
Yeah, I really did.
Backing down and lacking argument, he opted to just sit down on one of the skateboarding ramps. "Remind me why we had to meet here out of all places again?"
"This place..." Scaramouche followed his actions, sitting on the ramp opposite of him. "This place is special to me and [Name]. I used to skateboard often when I was still a student."
"She would always come to me with drinks and snacks in hand. Then, unofficially, this became our weekend hangout spot."
"So, you've liked her since... you were students?"
Kunikuzushi hummed.
"How come you've never told her in that whole time?"
"I'm a coward," he chuckled. "I didn't want to lose what we have. I was afraid that we would stray apart from each other once I do."
Ayato could do nothing but smile sympathetically. "I bet you wrote songs about her."
"Albums," Scaramouche corrected him.
"Damn."
"Yeah. Damn." Ayato felt the return of an intense glare. "I wrote entire albums for her then you had the audacity to hurt [Name] enough for her to end your relationship despite being deeply enamored with you? Wow. Tsk, tsk. Talk about a big jerk."
"I'm aware," he sighed. "Now, can you stop with that? Unless you really only called me out here to make me realize how much I messed up — which let's be honest I really did, and I honestly deserve every single shit you throw at me, but —"
"Glad to know that you know."
Ayato frowned.
He sensed a shift in Scaramouche's mood. He assumed the other was getting serious now. "I called you here because I want you to fix this mess... and to ask you a favor —"
"— I'm leaving [Name] in your care."
"..."
"However," The man pointed at him. "One mistake, Kamisato. One mistake and I'll make sure she'd want to spend her lifetime with me instead."
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privacy — ayato x reader smau
prev. masterlist. next.
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NOTES -> that was long im sorry ahfbdhd -> also scara pls be mine instead🥹🙏
TAGLIST I (closed) @catsrkool @sukunasrealgf @redactedhimbo @layla240 @mxlkytea13 @itsactuallylina @milza12 @aixaingela @tatiratty @kimiesstuff @laventiseriou @kunihaver @bibisbestgirl @lunaavity @coquettemaiden @opchara @slvdsjjk @cotton-eee @lady-elodie @dearxiiao @wheneverthesunrise @heartswonder @chuduchok @headphonesrlif3 @lleoll @vnderthesunn @lizzardlady1234 @nekogakuro @rifran @atlatcaheart @ani-st @creammpuff @lunastarjay @kittycasie @poisoned-candy-apples @zannivrs @b0bafl0wer @moonlightaangel @elsoleil
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julesdaydreams · 9 days
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@rosekillermicrofic II prompt: May 1 - rose II word count: 951
TW: blood (it's nothing major, just a cut, but it's there)
Barty was standing in front of him with a rose.
Barty, his best friend for over six years, was standing in front of him, Evan, with a fucking rose.
And Evan's mind was spinning.
It wasn't like he hadn't dreamt of a moment like this. When the ball at the end of the year was announced, Evan's mind immediately wandered towards Barty. How it would feel to go there with him. His best friend, but more importantly, with the boy he's been madly in love with for the better part of three years.
Evan imagined himself standing in front of Barty, asking him to the dance, and not as friends - like the other times the two of them had attended gatherings together instead of bringing a date because they just couldn't be arsed to ask someone - but as more.
And now Barty was standing in front of him with that damned rose, thorns still adorning the stem because of course Barty wouldn't bother removing them, would like the fact that if he wasn't careful they'd sting and draw blood.
Was this some crude joke of his friend? Was this like all those other times they've gone together to such things instead of bringing someone else? But no, that wouldn't explain the rose. In all those years there had never been a rose and Evan didn’t know what it meant.
“So?”, came the all too familiar voice and Evan's head snapped up and towards those large eyes that looked like Barty's, but also not because Evan had never seen them like this; wide and expecting, but there was fear behind them, a tension, as if Barty was ready to bolt if Evan said something wrong.
“What?” Was all Evan's very unhelpful brain could come up with.
Barty looked exasperated with him already.
“The ball, Evan. You want to go? With- With me?” Barty's voice was higher than usual, if not by much but Evan could tell. He was also fidgety - which was usually pretty normal for the boy, but not with Evan. Not when they were alone.
Finally focusing on the fact that he should probably say something, Evan stepped into action.
“Oh! Yeah sure, mate. You don't have to ask so formally, we always go together to these things, no?”, he laughed lightly but it all came out wrong. Because for once in his life Evan couldn't suppress the hope that this was something else, that this meant more, whatever that more was.
Barty cursed, rolled his eyes, before looking at Evan with so much intensity, he found himself pinned to the floor, not even blinking.
“Rosie, you know that's not what I meant. That's not what this is. I got you a rose for fucks sake! Isn't that obvious enough?! I don't want to go as mates. Not with you. Not anymore. I just- I really hope I haven't been reading this wrong and I'm making a complete arse of myself right now. But- you want this too, right? Want… want us to be more than best friends?”
It all came out in a jumbled mess, just calming down over the last few words and he sounded so unsure. Evan has never seen him like that he wanted to make it go away, now.
So, when his brain finally caught up with him, when his thoughts where finally aligned, focused on the boy in front of him, the boy he loved, he just acted.
He took the rose from Barty's hands, feeling the way the thorns dug into his palm, cutting skin, because he couldn't waste a moment being careful about such a thing when all he wanted was Barty.
His arms wrapped around Barty's neck, pulling him down the few inches he had on Evan, and crashed their mouths together.
It wasn't gentle. Maybe it could've been. If Evan wanted it to. He could've taken Barty's rose gently, instead of crushing the stem in his palm. Could've taken Barty's cheeks in both his hands, cradling them, before planting a sweet kiss to the other boys lips.
But Evan had waited three years for this moment. Had been gentle with his own heart this whole time, trying to protect it, to shield it from every hook-up of Barty's, from every hickey that the other had, that weren't from Evan.
For once he wanted to be reckless and now, here, with Barty he finally could.
Soon it was tongues and teeth clashing together and Evan biting Barty's tongue, drawing blood from the other and loving the taste, loving the whimper it elicited from the taller boy.
Evan would've spent the rest of his life standing there and snogging Barty, but the taller boy took a step back all too soon, looking at Evan with such adoration it made him melt on the insides.
“Is that a yes?”, Barty asked and it wasn't nervous anymore, but cocky. That familiar smirk on his face finally back where it's supposed to be and Evan was so happy with it all.
“That's a fucking yes. I'll go to that stupid dance with you, Barty.”
They kissed again, something long and slightly less brutal, if just as intense.
And if Evan forgot about the rose in his bloody hand and brought it to the side, cradling Barty's neck and jaw; if the thorns stung the other boy's creamy skin, painting it a crimson red… Well. None of them seemed to mind.
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