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plaid-shirtsandvibranium-arms · 3 years

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Nemesis: Retribution (2)

Summary: 10 years after the Avengers had left you for dead during a mission gone wrong, you unexpectedly re-enter their lives. Wholly unrecognizable from the person they used to know and now with a new team behind you, they ask for your help to stop a chain of syndicates who were manufacturing and peddling the super soldier serum. You were determined to say no until the chance at the vengeance you had been chasing for years was added to the offer.

Fandoms: Avengers, Marvel, MCU, The Punisher, Daredevil

Pairings: Female Reader x (Frank Castle, Billy Russo, Matt Murdock, Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes, Pietro Maximoff)

Warnings: MENTIONS OF SMUT FOR THIS CHAPTER. SHAMELESS SEXUAL BEHAVIOURS. (18+ ONLY), polyamorous relationships, reverse harem, blatant disregard for canon timelines and events, mentions of illnesses, momentary fluff, bit of angst care of Bucky, Punisher canon level of violence and gore, rejection, bullying, heartbreak, character death

A/N: I couldn’t resist not posting this early. Here you go. Next ones will probably take a while coz I have to be an actual adult for a bit.

No permission is granted to repost, steal, or translate my work. Not even a credit makes it okay. Tumblr is the only place I post my writing. If you see it anywhere else please report it.

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1:2 Dark Chocolate

A few days of rest was required to recover from a super soldier's punch. The doctors had said that you were lucky Steve hadn't punched you with full strength or else you would probably have a whole cracked rib cage. You were anxious to jump back in to training, not used to being idle for very long.

You were given some painkillers at the clinic and ordered to stay there for the rest of the afternoon for monitoring. When you woke up, it was early evening and a blonde super soldier was napping on a steel chair next to your bed. He jumped when you moved to sit up, his heightened senses alarmed and disoriented for a second before he quickly switched to repeatedly apologizing to you. You laughed out loud. It was just a little ridiculous to you to see such a commanding presence in the field so charmingly boyish and adorably embarrassed.

Steve was a comforting presence but to be honest you were hoping to see Bucky. You didn't get a chance to thank him since he left immediately after the doctors had ushered you into the examination room. Once you were cleared to return to training, you caught sight of his long brunette hair and the bright smile on your face couldn't be stopped. It was the glare he pinned you with that made you halt your approach.

He was back to his disapproval of your very existence.

You had to admit that it stung. You thought that you were getting somewhere with him after he helped you. At least somewhere outside of the realm of outward disdain. And maybe you were hoping just a little bit that it could lead down the road to him feeling the same about you.

The timing was perfect when you were assigned to your first official mission with the Avengers. It was a chance to prove your worth to the team and to Bucky in particular. A chance to maybe make him see you as more than just a troublesome recruit.

You came back from the mission with your head held high and absolutely glowing with confidence at the kudos from Sam and Natasha. The great Natasha Romanoff had complimented your sniping skills, picking off enemies in her area even before she could aim her own gun at them.

The first thing you wanted to do after getting back to the Compound was to tell Bucky. You wanted to brag a little bit and maybe even thank him for the mentoring. If he hadn’t been so hard on you then you wouldn’t have pushed yourself to be at this level. You were skipping down the halls of the Compound in search for him, clutching the bullet casing from your first official Avenger kill.

FRIDAY had informed you that he was in the training area and you were bouncing on your feet with excitement. As you entered though the place was empty, the rest of the agents having retired to the mess halls. You ventured further in, trusting FRIDAY’s intel until you heard some noises coming from the adjacent armory. You smiled, he must be cleaning his guns again.

As you got closer, the noise began to get louder until you could make out what was undeniably pleasured moaning, one low and gravelly while the other more high pitched. You should have turned away, if only for the privacy of the couple who was wrapped up in their passion, but your curiosity pushed you to come closer and peak through the small crack in the door.

The brief image that you saw made you instantly draw back, a shaking hand pressed to your mouth to silence the shocked gasp. You backed away slowly, your mind struggling to process what you had just seen, then your flight response kicked in and you ran like hell out of there. The scene was burning a hole in your brain and caused your skin to grow cold. Sergeant Barnes rutting hard against a woman wrapped around his waist, his glinting eyes locked with yours, and a cocky sneer on his face.

You didn’t go to dinner that night or to the team celebration for a successful first mission. You chose instead to lay in your bunk with tears burning in your eyes and trying to erase the memory of your discovery. Of course he was already dating someone. A man of his caliber was sure to have a line-up of gorgeous eager women at his disposal. He probably had no interest in boring recruits like yourself. The woman he was throwing into bliss must be some supermodel or high ranking spy. How did you even end up deluding yourself that you could possibly catch his eye?

The rest of your roommates filtered in after a few hours, chatting away noisily about the party. Anna had come to sit on the edge of your bed and ran a comforting hand along your arm, concern clearly etched on her face.

“I’m fine. Just tired. The mission really wore me out,” you muttered with a small smile. You weren't ready to talk about it yet.

“Personally I think I had better success today than all of you,” Kim’s shrill voice cut through the good natured conversations in the room.

She wasn’t part of the group taken on the mission, claiming beforehand that she was ill. A chorus of curious why’s rang out through the group and she preened at once again being the center of attention.

“Well I just had the fuck of a lifetime from none other than Sergeant James Barnes.”

The room of women burst into chaos; squeals of disbelief, rapid fire questions on how big he was and how good of a lay was he, were they dating now or was this a fuck buddy situation. Of course Kim was more than happy to entertain each question.

You tuned all of it out, the noise turning into an annoying ringing in your ear. You turned around to face the wall as the silent tears that refused to be contained any longer fell to wet your pillow. You barely registered Anna squeezing your shoulder or the words that Kim threw your way.

“Sorry, Y/N. I guess I was just more Bucky’s type.”

You curled yourself into a tighter ball as the pain in your chest radiated across your whole body. You had assumed wrong about Bucky. It seemed that he wasn’t opposed to dating new recruits.

He was just opposed to you.

The taunting from Kim continued on and you just couldn't take it any longer. You brushed the tears away, grabbed your sweater, and marched yourself to the door. You needed to get some air. You needed to get away. Anywhere but there. You wrenched open the door and almost came crashing straight toward a solid chest. Your eyes travelled up to lock with the kind blue gaze of Captain America. You wondered why Steve was standing at the doors of your bunkers holding a pack of beer in his hand.

"Good evening, ladies," he said to the room of now suddenly speechless females. "I'm just going to borrow Y/N for a bit."

The crowd remained in shocked silence while you stared at him in confusion as he smiled sweetly down at you. He had gone looking for you when he didn't see you at the celebration after Natasha and Sam had sang your praises to him at your performance. He wanted to congratulate you and bring you a drink for a job well done.

"Come on. I know a good spot," he said, placing a hand on your back and guiding you out.

Steve brought you to the top of an observatory in the Compound. It was quiet, peaceful, and offered a great view. He cracked open a bottle for you and the conversation just flowed naturally. He kept making you laugh until your sides hurt with stories about his time as a performer in the military and all the unfortunate videos that came with it. You were crying with pure joy when he relented and re-enacted his buy military bonds act, your earlier darkened mood forgotten for the moment.

Steve felt like he did something right when your glassy eyes and defeated expression was replaced with clear amusement. Even if it was at his expense. He wouldn't ask what the reason was, but he felt happy he made you feel better.

"Thank you, Steve," you muttered before you parted ways. Somehow both of you understood that it was more than just for the drink.

You promised yourself then that you would give yourself tonight to weep over your unfortunate romantic feelings. Only for tonight. Come morning you would focus all your energy on what you actually came here to do; become an Avenger. You slept fitfully that night, the shell casing from your first mission still gripped in your hand.

You made a conscious effort after that day to limit your interactions with Bucky and Kim to polite clipped conversations. At first Bucky had been surprised at your change in attitude, your blank expression and sparse words causing a momentary guilt to flash in his eyes. You had chosen instead to spend more time with Steve and the twins, your mood obviously brighter around them.

You were sitting now in a large conference room for a briefing on the next mission with a handful of other recruits when Sam Wilson sent you out to fetch the rest of the Avengers who were running late and not responding.

"Can you get them for me, sweetheart?" he chuckled, knowing that you blushed uncontrollably each time he used a nickname on you.

FRIDAY had directed you to the private common room exclusive for their use. You were about to knock on the door when you heard your name in the middle of what sounded like a heated argument. Against your better judgement, you leaned in closer.

"I don't think Y/N's cut out to be part of this team."

Your heart dropped. The conviction in Bucky's voice was clear. It was one thing for your infatuation with him to be forcefully thrown back at your face, but for him to explicitly state to a set of people that you held at such high esteem that you were not good enough was a whole other vicious heartbreak.

Lily was wrong. This time you should have known when to quit.

You forced yourself to crack the door wider and step inside, clearing your throat to announce your presence. You didn't see the startled look on their faces or the guilty one that followed when they realized that you had heard. One look at your sad glistening eyes that refused to look up confirmed it. Natasha and Steve both threw Bucky a deadly glare.

"Sam wants you all at a briefing. I was sent to come get you."

Your voice was so small and unsteady, none of the easy happiness and optimistic determination that it usually carried. Bucky felt the shame burn through him, the guilt drowning him in an instant. You weren't supposed to hear that. He took a step towards you, instinct driving him to do anything to wipe that defeated look off your face, but a threatening look from the twins pinned him in place.

"We'll walk back with you, little star," Pietro said softly, appearing beside you and wrapping an arm around your shoulder. Wanda came on the other side, looping your arm with hers.

For the rest of the briefing, you strained with the effort of focusing on Sam while blatantly ignoring Bucky. You knew he was staring a hole at the back of your head, but you couldn't allow yourself to give him any satisfaction by looking back. You were soon assigned your tasks, you being placed on sniper duty again having performed well the last time.

It was supposed to be a run of the mill mission for intel and taking out a criminal base, but with the expectation of more hostiles so a slightly bigger team was necessary. You practically flew out of the room when you were dismissed, not giving anyone a chance to talk to you. A decision was solid in your mind now for when you got back.

This would be your last mission.

The ride on the jet to the location was spent with you cleaning your gear and checking your weapons. You were sliding a few knives in place when Bucky came in front of you holding out another set of knives for you to take.

"You know if you tilt the hilt to the left you can fit more in one holster," he said.

It was odd hearing him with almost warmth in his tone toward you. If it had happened yesterday, you probably would be celebrating this fact. You nodded at him, but didn't say a word.

"Remember to keep your head low and stay on your post. Okay, doll?"

You nodded wordlessly again. Because you made a point not to look at his face, you missed the way he was struggling to say more to you and the disheartened look when you obviously weren't going to answer him. You ignored him for the rest of the ride, choosing to focus on reviewing the intel.

As far as bad intel could go, this had to be the worst. You were perched up on a densely covered hill a good distance away from the base that the rest of the team were storming. You were picking off as many hostiles coming out of the base as quick as your hands would allow. Your fingers were starting to ache from the constant reloading, your eyes stung from the gunpowder, and your lip was already bleeding from biting down on it.

The noise in the comms was pure mayhem. Each team member trying to ask for help, for backup, for a plan. You had all come expecting a fight but not an army prepared to defend. You were certainly not expecting HYDRA.

"They have Bucky."

Three words spoken that sent a cold dread to wash over all of you. HYDRA couldn't be allowed to take Bucky. You abandoned your post without a second thought and sprinted down toward the base, pistols at the ready for anyone coming your way.

"Last location," you asked urgently as you slipped into the building shooting down two agents immediately.

"West wing. Near the last corridor," Steve grunted, clearly having a hard time on his end. "Y/N, do not engage!"

"I'm the closest one, Cap."

"I'm close too. Just a little busy," Natasha huffed. "I'll follow, Y/N. Steve, we need to get the hell out of here."

Steve had reluctantly agreed, seeing that there was no other choice. He quickly barked orders and commanded you to keep safe. You nodded although he couldn't see it as you wove through the corridors at full speed in search of your teammate. The moment you barged into that last room, your eyes found an unconscious Bucky immediately.

Seeing him in that chair horrified you; shirt ripped, bleeding in several areas, skin pale and cold with sweat, chest rising and falling far too rapidly, and eyes that were unresponsive. You were so distracted by the jarring image that you failed to notice the operatives across the room until the bullets were burning through your soft flesh.

You screamed from the pain, but raised your gun and fired back until you heard their bodies thud heavily on the floor. You clutched at your side, the amount of wet blood pouring out was alarming. You pushed your own welfare aside and hurriedly undid Bucky's restraints. It was a struggle to sit up a semi-conscious super soldier and when you took his weight on your shoulders, you collapsed to the floor at the intense pain in your arm. You hadn't realized that you had multiple shots there too.

You gritted your teeth and groaned at the effort of lifting you both up, your blood soaking through your gear as well as Bucky's. You huffed painfully with each step but you just had to get him out of there. You could have kissed Natasha square in the mouth when you saw her come barreling towards you.

"Jesus fucking Christ, Y/N!" she winced at your state before taking Bucky's other side. Apparently you looked as bad as you felt. "We gotta move fast. I hear more of them coming up this way. This path is clear."

Having Natasha's help in carrying Bucky alleviated some of the burden from you and made you all move faster, but the blood loss was already starting to make your vision blurry and the adrenaline was wearing off. Through the haze, you could also hear the rapidly approaching footsteps. Soon you would be basically useless and you knew there was no way Natasha could carry you both out while fighting off a hoard of enemies.

"Natasha," you said quietly, your steps faltering.

"No. Keep going goddamn it!" Natasha cried.

She knew what you were thinking. She had assessed the situation too and come to the same miserable conclusion. You smiled sadly at her angry eyes and shaking head as you let go of your hold on Bucky. Her eyes widened further as you limped toward the doors behind you and locked them tight before raising your guns to aim right at anyone who would come through them.

She didn't miss how your hands were shaking and your shot arm could barely hold up, the way you scowled deeper in pain with each movement, or how your uniform was soaked in your own blood and slowly forming a pool at your feet. Ghastly as you looked, you turned your head and tossed her another gentle smile. You were basically going to use yourself as a human shield for them and yet you were comforting her. You were reassuring her.

"Check on my sister for me, yeah?"

Natasha wanted to insist on another plan. Anything other than leave you behind to hold off the nearing enemy units. Shouting and gunfire from the other side of the door forced her to make a decision. She cursed sharply under her breath and dragged Bucky away with her, the regret heavy on her heart for having to leave you behind.

You stepped further back and supported your weak body against the wall after Natasha had thankfully left. The enemy was trying their hardest to barge through the door, ramming into it and shooting their guns at the locks. It wouldn't be long now before they manage to breach it.

You took a moment to spare a thought for your sister. A part of you was saddened to think of her grief after she finds out that you had done the most heroic thing anyone could ever do.

Sacrifice.

Another part of you was relieved knowing that she had Jill and she wouldn't be alone in that grief. When you decided this morning that this would be your last mission, you didn't necessarily expect it to be in this way.

"I'm sorry, Lily."

Natasha managed to get Bucky back to the jet where the rest of the team were all converging, still fighting off operatives chasing after them. There just didn't seem to be any end to them.

"I'm going back for Y/N!" she yelled to the team as she dropped Bucky on the floor of the jet. There was no time to be gentle, she had to hurry back to help you out.

"What do you mean? Where the hell is Y/N, Nat?" Steve shouted as he grabbed her arm.

"She stayed behind to hold off the ones chasing us so we could get out. I have to go back!"

"I will go. I can get her out," Pietro volunteered at once but he doubled over immediately from the extensive wounds on his torso.

Natasha was already sprinting back into the compound, not willing to waste another minute. She made it only a few feet before the entire facility exploded into a fiery inferno that quickly ravaged it and threw her farther back.

The entire team watched in horror as the explosions continued on several parts of the structure. The area was quickly getting engulfed by the flames and smoke. Steve had to force everyone onto the jet and bodily carry a shell shocked Natasha.

No one could have possibly survived that.

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Natasha steadied her breath as she quietly landed on a perch high above in the rafters of a seedy warehouse. Wanda joined her seconds later, weaving her magic to better cloak them. The other twin was running a lap around the perimeter and would join them later.

She was assigned weird missions all the time. Missions that had very little to doubtful intel was common. This mission though was by far the strangest she's ever gotten. There was a very small list of vague things that were told to them; the time and location, not to intervene, to remain unseen until the target was ready, bring the target to the Compound.

She was slightly annoyed, but she complied anyway. She was curious too as the mission was given in secret to only the three of them. A million questions was speeding through her mind as she observed the activity below. It looked like a regular run of the mill drug den filled with busy workers and roving guards.

"How many, Wanda?" Natasha whispered.

"I sense more than 25 of them. All armed, but with much fear."

A gust of wind signaled the return of the other twin. He had a frown on his face and a concerned look in his eyes. "There is another one, but this one does not seem to be with them."

Natasha was starting to sincerely doubt this mission when a fast movement from the shadows caught her eye. By the way the twins perked up too, they surely had seen it. They followed the figure as it slipped through the darkness, almost losing track if they hadn't noticed that the guards were quickly dwindling in number. Natasha was growing worried, this was surely a highly skilled group of assassins. Pietro must have been mistaken. They were clean and efficient too.

All of a sudden a gunfight broke out below them. A figure completely clad in black, strolled casually out from the shadows with a pistol in each hand firing precisely at their targets. They confidently charged closer, unfazed as they greeted the gunfire. They continued to tear viciously through the crowd with a deadly mix of combat, bullets, and blades.

The workers had drawn their weapons by now as well, but they were quickly killed off with barbaric aggression. It did not take long for the floor below to become a sea of blood and lifeless bodies. One person remained barely alive, hanging on to his middle to keep his internal organs from spilling out from the wide gash. The attacker came to him, nonchalantly stepping over decimated bodies. They couldn't hear what was exchanged from this distance, only the choked scream that followed as he was stabbed straight through the throat. His blood spurting out like a broken faucet.

Natasha had been in this profession for a while, but she has never seen this level of unrestrained violence.

One person.

One single person had cleared out a base of approximately 30 people. Natasha was growing more and more worried. Clearly this person was at the very least an enhanced and even with the twins with her, they were not prepared to face someone powered.

What kind of bloodthirsty lunatic does this?

"You can come down now."

All three of them froze in place. Looking down, the attacker was staring right at them with cloaked eyes. Reluctantly and very slowly, Wanda used her powers to float them down carefully keeping a good distance from this murderer.

From this close they could now see that they were in full military tactical gear in what was originally all matte black, but now had an explosion of dripping red. Combat boots, fitted cargo pants, a long sleeved shirt underneath a tight bulletproof vest, gloves, a loose hood over their head, and a cloth mask around the lower half of their face.

"Should have known something was up when my team mentioned seeing a really fast man."

The shivers that travelled through every expanse of skin on Natasha, was a reaction to that voice. It sounded strangely familiar yet unknown, but something in her mind was denying her from piecing it together. The moment the hood was dropped to reveal their eyes was when she spiraled into a complete icy shock. They were eyes that had haunted her for the past ten years. Haunted all of them. The only difference was that the eyes in her memories were smiling warmly.

The bloodied face mask was lowered to reveal a face they mourned, unmistakable and yet completely different. White raised scars branched out like weaving vines from the right side of the neck to just above the jaw and the ears. They were obviously old and healed but still raised and prominent, adding an even more dangerous edge to the menacing look on their face.

Your face.

"Hello, Natasha. Pietro. Wanda."

10 years after they had watched you tragically perish in a burning HYDRA facility, you stood before three of a group of people you had unknowingly tormented all these years.

The earpiece you wore crackled to life. "Blackbird to Hedwig. I have a visual. Should I shoot them?"

You smirked. There was no need for that. At least not right now.

"Hey, Blackbird. Tell Raven I'll be late for dinner. I have a reunion to get to."

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A/N: Tell me which pairing or combination in this harem you’re most looking forward to. Smut or otherwise. I’m still rearranging scenes and working out smut. There is a long list of kinks. I need help.

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sylvie-writes · 4 years

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Bad: The Unfortunate Ending

Inspired by this song ➳ Bad by Lennon Stella

(Ransom Drysdale x wife reader)

A/n: this is my first attempt at angst so here we go...

Disclaimer: not part of my fall writing, this is just a lil something bc I needed to write, it makes me happier after days as today.

Warnings: Cheating, mild profanity, shitty angst & writing. Ransom being an asshole (rip all the soft Ransom stories I’ve written)

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Never in a thousand years would you have seen yourself sitting in Boston’s most expensive and high end restaurant, a steak simmering at 500 degrees laying out in front of you, and the Ransom Drysdale sweetly smiling at you.

“Wait, before you start eating, I have something to ask you, love.”

Was he gonna break up with you?

Ransom reached over his plate to reach your hand gently bringing it to his lips while maintaining eye contact with your shocked expression, soon calming.

Oh whew.

The man then set down your hand, and folded up the napkin in his lap before rounding the table, getting down on one knee. Your eyes were already welling up with tears, making it impossible to see all the people staring at you and Ransom.

“(y/n) (l/n)...

… … ...

Will you marry me?”

After his adoring speech, the four little words came out and the man on his knee was staring up at you like you were a goddess. Overwhelmed, you happily spewed out the words of acknowledgement while Ransom slipped the lavish diamond onto your ring finger, kissing the now ringed finger before scooping you up from your chair, the two of you in a deep kiss amidst the cheers.

A few months later the two of you got married, and everything was a dream. You had a lovely house, and a husband who was practically your closest friend. The two of you spent all your time together, told every joke, talked all the time. Believe or not but Mr. Fancy Pants had preferred that you got married sooner rather than having an extravagant wedding ceremony.

So that's what you did. One lovely Monday morning, you and Ransom drove to the courthouse, in the beamer, as if it were just any other day.

You thought then and there, that this was it. Life was finally playing in your favor...

All the little gifts you gave

I call it over compensating

Feeling just like a princess

Every answer was always yes

You had me living in a dream

“Oh Ransom!” You played with the little puppy down at your feet, a red ribbon adoring it’s small, yet fluffy neck.The little thing jumped into your arms, causing you to lift off the floor, walking closer to Ransom.

“Why did you get me a puppy, Hugh?”

He just cheekily smiled and shrugged, walking by to kiss your cheek. “No reason!”

You just laughed it off before going outside to play fetch with the energetic fur baby.

Ransom always treated you for no reason, at times you really hated him for it, but not once would he ever let up.

About four months into your marriage, Harlan had invited you and Ransom to some writer’s charity gala, a black and white party, meaning Ransom was gonna rent a tux and you’d find an overly priced yet attractive dress.

So, one Saturday afternoon, you and Ransom went to the mall, getting fitted for your clothes. You weren’t about the name brands like Ransom was, but today, Ransom now had full advantage to shower you in expensive clothing having already picked his tux yesterday. His sneaky little plan to go dress shopping with you.

“What about this one?” Your husband held up a black slip dress designed by Prada. Curiously you walked up to him, checking the tag to see its $1,000 price. In all honesty, from the looks of the dress, you had assumed Ransom picked up a simple dress. Sure, it was pretty but you weren’t about to pay that much just for the name. For what it is worth, you could sew and tailor the damn thing yourself.

“That’s ridiculous, Ransom. I’m not about to pay that much.”

You went to go walk off before you felt Ransom’s hot breath in your ear.

“Who said you were paying?”

Turning around, you playfully pushed him in the chest to which he laughed and peppered kisses all over your face.

“Ransom! Stop, you’re making a scene!”

He pulled away for a minute, your giggles ceasing.

“Let me treat you and I will stop.”

Quickly, the man resumed his attack, your pleas soon becoming words of compliance.

“Fine!”

His signature smirk danced across his lips, while his free arm snaked around your waist ushering you to the tailor’s stand.

What's forever long to you

Did you say that to her too

Making sure that I'd never know

Callin her while the shower goes

It was a little after midnight and Ransom wasn’t home yet, today he had been out with some friends, not inviting you. Your only company for the day was your precious little puppy, who was curled up against your stomach. The endless worry had kept you up all night as you mindlessly stroked the puppy’s back, trying to calm your own nerves.

Eventually, an hour later, the hallway light shone under the door, Ransom coming in. He was met with your worried look and came to rush over to your side.

“You scared me to death, Ransom. Two hours ago, you were supposed to be back!”

“I know. I know. I’m so sorry baby. Now, get some sleep, I love you. Forever, my love.”

Ransom gently pulled the blanket over you, kissing you goodnight, then heading off to shower.

Turning on the shower, Ransom pulled the phone out of his pocket, scrolling to the bottom of his contacts and dialing, Blair❤️.

“Hey baby, today was amazing Ranny!”

A deep chuckle left Ransom’s throat, the woman on the phone giggling.

“I know, angel. You are the best, love ya forever, Sweetheart.”

Blair continued to gush over the phone, recalling the earlier events of the day at her house where Ransom had spent the whole day. (leaving that sentence to the eye of the beholder.)

Shower, and you, long forgotten, Ransom spent the rest of the night talking to the woman, leaving the bedroom to go downstairs, assuming you were already asleep.

Ironically, that night, you dreamt of all the times you and Ransom would stay up just talking and laughing...

Then crawl back in bed, it's a shame

I probably should've known better

It was 4 am, and Blair had fallen asleep on the phone, leaving Ransom to bid her goodbye and get some shut eye himself.

It was like sleeping next to a stranger, the warmth of the bed now gone. Coldness, replacing the loving embrace.

About two months ago, your work gave its employees a week off for the holidays. It was once in a blue moon that you got to see your family, so you seized this opportunity. You wished your husband could have come, but Ransom had to stay behind to help Harlan with an upcoming novel. In truth, Ransom never saw himself reverting back to his bad ways, but who knows what entices people to change.

One night, Ransom went out for a drink, a young lady, about twenty-seven years old, came up to the sulking man. He was drowning his sorrows in a couple of beers, wishing he were there with you. Oh how he missed you!

“Hey stranger.”

The sultry voice hit too close to home for Ransom, a voice he knew all too well.

And let’s just say a few drinks later, he came to remember his old fling as Blair.

I wish that you would've treated me bad

The truth is you couldn't have loved me better

Now I'm left feeling twice as sad

I wish you would've treated me bad bad bad

It felt like you were living a hallmark movie, and never would you have thought any different.

Your feet were propped on the Ransom’s lap as the two of you laid down Uno cards on the coffee table.

“Ransom?”

“Yes, darling?”

You set the Uno cards in your lap, adjusting on the couch so that you’d be straddling Ransom. The man brightly smiling at you, enveloping you with his muscular arms. In complete bliss, you leaned forward and kissed him, a slow and intimate kiss. Time completely stopped as you were just in your own little world.

He treated you so well, you’d never be prepared for the heartbreak that’d ensue.

I wasn't catching on to you

Blinded by your lips so smooth

Excusing all of your gotta goes

Leaving me to be all alone

“Do you really have to go, Ransom?”

Your arms were wrapped around the man’s neck, pleading for him to stay. A small frown made a way onto his lips before he leaned in to kiss you deeply, pulling away from your lips while you were still trying to catch up.

“I gotta go.”

With that, he rushed out. A business meeting was it? Or was it Harlan? You couldn’t remember. For the past two months, you’ve been accepting all of his excuses, soon all of them blending, yet in the end you were always left standing in the house, alone with your dog.

It's okay, you told yourself. Sure he forgot your birthday last month. It’s fine.

As long as he didn't forget your wedding anniversary next month, everything would be fine…

Right?

Then you took my heart just the same

I probably should've known better

No it wasn’t fine. He forgot your anniversary. He forgot you. In the mornings, he’d no longer stay with you, instead finding an excuse to rush out, no kisses, not even hugs, Rarely did the two of you talk and soon, it became your new normal.

You should’ve known better.

Every word you said you was sweet but you was lying

Everything you covered making up just to keep to me from crying

Another late night, Ransom had gone to help his mother at some dinner party for her business, or so he said. He left early this morning, claiming he was gonna help set up and that he’d be home by 8. Yet, here you are, watching the 11 o’clock news, waiting for your husband’s arrival since he had left you with radio silence all day.

Suddenly, the door flew open, a sloppily dressed Ransom, stumbling in, clearly piss-ass drunk.

“Oh you're awake!”

You walked over to help him sit on the couch, just as you were about to turn off the lamp beside the couch, you noticed a tint of red lipstick on Ransom’s lips. You hadn’t worn any lipstick today, right?

Tenderly, you traced your thumb over his lips, as his eyes gazed into yours.

“Ransom, what’s on your lips?”

In a poor attempt, Ransom went to grab your hand, missing and instead grabbing your shoulder, leaning in to kiss you, instead getting your ear.

“It’s nothing, (y/n).”

His head was laying on your shoulder, as he was about to fall asleep, his energy suddenly gone.

“Really? It seems like something, you have a woman’s lipstick on your lips for god sake!”

Ransom then perked up and hugged you tightly, whispering reassuring words to you. Drunkenly, his words mashed together, causing you to barely understand his “comforting” speech.

“I love you so much, sweetheart, I’d never do that to you.”

Sweetheart, a name once reserved for you, now unknowingly shared with another woman.

Believing his lies, because why not? He had never given you a reason not to trust him, not yet anyway.

I wish that you would've treated me bad

The truth is you couldn't have loved me better

Now I'm left feeling twice as sad

I wish you would've treated me bad bad bad

That very next week, Ransom had to leave once again, this time a boys’ trip to the club. You thought nothing of it, now used to his absence, keeping to yourself with the dog and some friends.

Later that afternoon, you were enjoying a sandwich and lemonade out on the front porch when a Maseratti pulled into the driveway, a familiar man stepping out.

“(y/n)! Is Ransom home?”

The man pulled you into an embrace, leaving you confused at his presence.

“Why are you here Oliver? Ransom said he was out with you and James.”

Oliver just shrugged his shoulders, he too jumping to the same conclusion. At this point you were just seeing red, storming into the house, Oliver following. You practically were stomping holes into the hallway for your footsteps were as heavy as your heart. Maybe all along you had been suspicious deep inside, maybe you just never wanted to believe it.

Then finding Ransom’s phone in his nightstand, you came back into the doorway to meet Oliver. If your suspicions were true, you’d like to at least embarrass the dumbass in front of his friend. They all knew he was a playboy at heart, but after you, every one had assumed he’d matured somewhat.

Clearly, they were all wrong.

Your husband was the biggest idiot in the world, making his password your anniversary date, for he was so forgetful. You found this hilarious, because he forgot your first wedding anniversary, god you were so naive.

Was this wrong? Sleuthing through his phone?

Sure. But it could never equal up to what you were about to find.

Opening text messages, 50 unread, all from you, your messages definitely ignored as a woman named Blair was at the top of his messages.

You gagged at the heart by her name, one that used to be by yours. Scrolling through the texts, you found yourself growing angrier by the minute, finally, you just lost it. With great vehemence, you slammed the phone against the floor, making it shatter everywhere, Oliver and your dog, slightly jumping.

It was then that it hit you.

You crashed to the floor, crying hysterically, as the world came crashing down with you. Oliver, crouching down on the floor, trying to calm your sobs.

Tonight you were gonna confront that backstabbing, no good, cheating son of a bitch.

Tell me the truth

Was it worth it was I worth it for you

'Cause we were perfect we working til you

Forgot to tell me you been seeing someone else for six years

It was 9 pm and you hadn’t expected Ransom’s arrival for another hour or two, so you spent the time packing your bags and drinking some coffee, preparing yourself to tear the man a new one.

This time, there wasn’t a slammed door signaling Ransom’s presence, rather soft footsteps and his low voice, like the old days.

Ha, the one time he gets home early. Ehh you were ready anyway

“Hey babe! Oooh can I have some?”

Before you could answer, Ransom took your mug and a few swigs of coffee, handing it back to you, placing a kiss on your head. In utter surprise, you looked up at the man who just smiled down at you.

“You look I haven’t kissed you in weeks, my love.”

And with that he pecked your lips quickly, walking to the counter, you still trying to process what had just happened.

It was true. He hadn’t kissed you in weeks.

No, you weren’t gonna let him win this time.

“It’s because you haven’t.”

Confusion swirled around on Ransom’s face, allowing you to continue.

“You haven’t kissed me in weeks. But you have kissed Blair, I'm sure.”

The coffee mug in his hand dropped onto his foot, shattering, leaving you smirking at the small victory.

Heartbreak can make one go insane. Afterall, you are losing the one person you loved most, losing yourself along with them.

“For months I have put up with your bullshit…”

A good ten minutes passed of you yelling at Ransom, the man unexpectedly letting you finish.

“You’re a cheating, son of a bitch.”

Angrily, you ripped off the wedding ring, now noticing Ransom wasn’t even wearing his, for god knows how long too. Once upon a time, he’d proudly wear it all the time.

“(y/n) wait--”

Ransom grabbed your arm before you slapped him, the man slightly stunned.

“No. I’m tired of your excuses, I’m tired of letting you win. You and Brittany, should have an amazing life together, that is if you can even commit to her like you told me.”

A whisper of defeat left his mouth.

“It’s Blair…”

“The hell with it! You broke my heart Ransom! I knew it was too fucking good to be true. DAMN IT, I LOVED YOU.”

Hysterically laughing, you looked like a mad woman, lowering your voice just a bit.

“You know what makes this hurt 2x worse? I thought you had actually loved me too, because it seemed like it.”

You broke into tears, your heart in a thousand pieces, rushing away to grab your bags, Ransom not even trying to fight, knowing you're too strong this time. He let the best thing that ever happened to him slip away.

Ages ago you could remember the lovely times with the man you once would die for, yet...

Your love was just an illusion.

I wish that you would've treated me bad

The truth is you couldn't have loved me better

Now I'm left feeling twice as sad

I wish you would've treated me bad bad bad

I wish that you would've treated me bad

Truth is you couldn't have loved me better

Now I'm left feeling twice as sad

I wish you would've treated me bad bad bad

a/n: maybe i should stay away from angst bc this sucked.

Updated a/n: this is gonna be a series! If you’d like to be on the taglist lemme know!!

#ransom drysdale #ransom drysdale x reader #ransom drysdale x you #ransom drysdale imagine #chris evans #chris evans x reader

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rejectclone · 4 years

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Even though I’ve never played Minecraft EVER in my life, since Steve got in smash I tried learning some general stuff about the series on the wiki and apparently there’s no ‘real’ lore to him??? I tried making some headcanons at least since I genuinely like the character potential he has!

* Steve seemed to originate out of virtually nowhere, just being spotted by some villagers one day and he seemed to just set up camp nearby, soon making a small house of his own.

* He is mute, but is still capable of writing in English and communicating with ASL. Unfortunately for him, villagers and other sentient humanoid species do not comprehend his hand gestures, and thinks he’s just messing around with them, much to his dismay.

* As for how he learned how to write and use ASL, he oddly doesn’t seem to remember. He assumes he learned it from his parents, and yet he doesn’t even remember their own faces.

* He claims that he is a orphan, as most of his childhood memories seem to be in a haze, and his stronger memories seem to exist from his mid-teenage years as he was already living off the land on his own.

* He is gifted in both mining and construction, and likes to dabble in alchemy. However he is still a rookie at it, and has accidentally ruined many important items by trying to place enchantments upon them.

* He doesn’t really have that many hobbies, as he’s always focused on maintaining his home, crops, animals, and safety, which is a constant 24/7 endeavor. Later on after exploring more villages and learning new lifestyle related information, he has taken up reading as a small hobby. This is where he first learned of preforming alchemy, as he once thought it was impossible to learn if you weren’t ‘gifted’ with it.

* He has seen his fair share of mobs, but the ones that seem to ALWAYS rock him to his core are oddly enough, the zombies. He claims that every time he even glances at one, he feels extreme discomfort. Perhaps it has to deal with most zombies originating of supposed human origin, and their uncanny valley-ness getting to his mind.

* Zombies honestly may be the closet thing to ‘other human beings’ in the area, as Steve seems to be the odd one out in terms of species. Villagers, Illagers, Endermen, and other sorts are in abundance, but not his own kind. He tries to not let this go to his head, but there has been plenty of nights of him suffering from touch-deficiency and total isolation.

* Even though he may be seen as a outsider to many, nobody can deny how much of a optimist he is. Constantly beaming with joy and always willing to help, he has become well known for being one of the most incredibly helpful people out there.

* However it is quite rare in which he comes off as incredibly stoic and even morose. When like this, the metaphysical aura he gives off is immediately powerful and extremely unsettling, to the point some usually hyper aggressive hostile mobs seem to notice this and actually leave him alone.

* Genuinely did not know WHAT a cake was. Learned about it and tried it for the first time from a farmer villager, and has been completely enamored since. Has developed a bit of a sweet tooth from consuming too much after learning about it, and now tries to eat cake moderately. He also enjoys pumpkin pie, but only during the fall months since it feels ‘more cozy feeling’. Ironically not a huge fan of cookies, and prefers the chocolate in them to be used in cakes.

* His favorite mobs to interact with are most of his own livestock! He owns pigs, cows, sheep, donkeys, and even a rabbit! However, chickens might be his top favorite, and thankfully he doesn’t really eat them and instead just takes advantage of their eggs and how fun and enjoyable it is to maintain them. Later on as he saw parrots for the first time in person, he has been in absolute love with them!

* Even though he does keep and maintain livestock, he is petrified by the concept of keeping a permanent house pet. He has actually tamed some wolves and cats in the past, but has endured too much heartbreak when they are accidentally killed when trying to defend him when undead mobs attack near their home. He always breaks down when burying their remains.

* He does own a horse, but is wary of using it since the last thing he wants to do is accidentally overstrain it and cause it any harm. He still cannot bear to see any more animals under his care go through any pain for him.

* He keeps a small beehive near his house, as he enjoys how their pollination leads to some beautiful flowers sprouting up around his home. He sometimes harvests their honey, but has been stung so many times that he’s not really willing to harvest honeycombs again. It took him quite some time to realize that he needed to use a campfire to calm the bees down, as before he just literally shoved his arm in the hive to get honeycombs.

* He will sometimes try to add new flowers that he discovers from his travels to his home’s makeshift garden, but eventually he really started to put more effort in having a visually pleasing garden and not just having a mess of various plants and flowers.

* Kinda thinks Creepers are cute, but is equally scared of their odd ability to explode violently. He has tried many times to tame them but always inadvertently scares them, soon prompting their unfortunate demise. He still has hope for possibly meeting a non-exploding Creeper one day, but will still keep his distance out of fear.

* He is a good swimmer, capable to dive to considerable depths, but refuses to go down to the deeper parts of the ocean such as the surface floor. Mainly out of concern from accidentally drowning by not being able to make it to the water’s surface in time, and also his distaste for looking at the Drowned as they also give him that ‘off’ feeling.

* He doesn’t mind crafting potions when needed, but feels like most of the time they’re quite unnecessary as they mainly take away the trill and inherent danger of exploring. He will cave in however and will use the Potion of Water Breathing and the Potion of Fire Resistance when he knows he’s heading into some riskier areas.

* As for how Steve met Alex, it was quite sudden actually. He was just out exploring when he saw them hunting in the distance, stalking some Skeletons. He assumed at first it was just some brave Villager, but soon noticed how their physical proportions seem to mirror his. After realizing that they ARE human, he was too shy and terrified to actually go up to them and introduce himself. What if they thought he was a creepy stalker? Or a Pillager?! It seems to be fate however when Alex was soon cornered and he threw himself into the fray to help. After the fight, the two awkwardly interacted, as Alex does speak English but didn’t realize that Steve was mute. Since then the two have interacted more and more, showing to each other their homes and various bases, along with trading goods and their own life stories to pass the time together. He does hold some romantic feelings for Alex, but holds it inside of him as he fears that expressing his love would inadvertently scare them away.

* His body is wracked with scars, all from various accidents and misadventures. Strangely however, he does have some scars that would only be created from fatal wounds, such as a arrow entry-wound scar directly over where his heart should be, or odd deep bite wounds around his neck. Steve always seems to shrug these scars off and claim that they’re usually from falling debris when mining, but it seems unlikely.

* He claims that he tends to suffer from randomly occurring nightmares, all ending in brutal deaths such as being burned alive in lava or being ripped to shreds by zombies. If you were to ask what happened before these events, he will explain that it feels ‘just like any other day’ before the death happens. He is completely oblivious to the fact that after each nightmare, a new scar seems to appear on his body.

* Sometime after Steve ‘moved in’ to the area, there has been some strange rumors of another human, a unusually hostile human..... Some Villagers claim it is a near splitting image of Steve, but they refuse to believe it’s him. After all, why would he become so....... brutal..... The few that managed to observe this human usually claim that his body is usually drenched in his own gore from being mauled, charred beyond belief, riddled with arrows and weapons still lodged in their flesh, or even fully drenched in seawater with them perpetually vomiting it and blood out. Others claim that this human has no pupils or iris, just a unsettling white void that almost appears ethereal-like.

* When addressing Steve about this odd human lurking around in this area, he is actually quite curious yet afraid about it. He met Alex by chance, as they’re more of a free roaming explorer, so perhaps this new human is akin to Alex’s more extreme traveling lifestyle? He does agree however on their reported violent behavior to be..... deeply unsettling....... setting Illagers on fire to only chop up their corpses in the end, disfiguring and torturing Witches with their own potions, purposely corralling Creepers together to cause a horrible chain reaction to occur that deeply scars the ground, drowning Endermen and proceeding to gouge out their eyes after the deed has been done......... certainly dark actions for a twisted individual. Steve thinks they might be observing him, as he has found trails of blood and other various fluids leading up to his house’s door every few days. He can only hope that if they were to meet one fateful day, he would be spared.

#really had fun writing these!!!!#minecraft #MC Steve #steve #mc alex #Alex #herobrine #vinyl scratching

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ppatpranss · 4 years

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GAYA SA PELIKULA EP. 02 Review: Let’s talk about that dinner scene.

“May nahanap ka na bang mauuwian?”

I always have this kind of fear over a series that I already liked in the first episode: a fear that the second one will not live up to it, and so will the rest. But Gaya Sa Pelikula on its second episode did not disappoint, and instead set a whole new pace that further strengthens the story it wants to tell. In this episode, you get easy banters, hilarious make-believe and intriguing fantasies, heartwarming softness, a piercing tension at every turn, that very subtle buildup of romance, and of course, that wonderful conversation on the dining table.

Early warning that I have been gushing about the dinner scene since last night, so it will take up a lot of space in this review/discussion.

[WATCH EPISODE 02 HERE]

youtube

What sets Gaya apart

Every time I watch an episode of this show and would rewatch it, I am always overwhelmed with the amount of observations I am able to write down. There are a lot of elements that make this such a good watching experience, and all of those elements just naturally come together. By this, I mean that it does not rely solely on, say, just directing or writing or acting. All of these come together, and I appreciate that you can clearly see how well-thought out everything is.

Episode 02 is a lot more free-flowing and non-structured in my opinion. Transitions feel a lot smoother this time compared to the more scene-after-scene approach of the (no less incredible) pilot episode. Because of this, I actually feel like this point is the real beginning of the story – that this sets the tone for a lot of the future events that could possibly happen between Karl and Vlad, and the people in their lives.

Personally, this is what sets Gaya apart not just among the BL series, but also in Philippine TV in general. For the longest time, we got used to stagnant or repetitive conflicts. Sometimes all the drama are injected to overwhelm the audience. But this one takes its time well. This is a show that wants to bring its audience along its every journey.

Parallels, heartbreaks, buildups

The opening scene picks up where we left off, with Ate Judit now writing a check for Karl’s rent because Vlad will stay over. She reminds Karl that while she’s a cool sister, she won’t stand for her brother getting hurt again. With this, she specifically mentioned “a boy too sweet to swat a fly” who broke his brother’s heart before.

First of all, I’m getting a sudden whiplash whenever this is brought up because I know exactly who it is. Given the first encounter of Karl with Vlad, where he saw him drunkenly dancing to a song about intense heartbreak (again, stream tyl by kakie!), it must have been something truly painful. It doesn’t help as well that there is an obvious parallel going on here with the fact that the description also fits Karl. At one point, Vlad also tells him that he does not need to worry because he looks like someone who does not have a power to hurt him anyway. They are really setting us up as early as now for the heartache, no?

In the same way, I appreciate how this show inserts the sexual attraction also forming between the two of them. Sexual attraction is a part of romance. Gaya normalizes it and emphasizes that it is just natural. The couch scene was particularly genius because of the double meanings of Karl and Vlad’s exchange. But more than that, I like how it also unapologetically shows the physical component of that attraction by having Karl and Vlad sit close together. Vlad even has his arm around Karl. Even the fact that Karl stared at Vlad when he got out of the bathroom was a nice touch.

While the One More Chance dream fantasy was all sorts of hilarious and sexy, it is a testament to how Karl’s subconscious is already telling him something that he keeps on denying. I also like the nice touch there when Karl woke up, he was just disoriented that he had a dirty dream, but not disgusted by it (there are some series and dramas that do this). He is attracted to Vlad. However, for Karl to accept his feelings, it also means that he needs to accept his sexuality. A point which was discussed primarily in the scene before this – the conversation at the dining table.

The phenomenal dinner scene

I wish I am able to give justice to this scene through words, and I’ll try because we need to talk about it (or I need to talk about it). As a fan of films and TV series, I feel like conversations are the most difficult to bring to the surface. You need to keep the audience’s attention while also making sure that the depth is there. For me, what I always look for in conversation scenes are three things: (1) how normal these conversations would sound like as if you are overhearing them from the table next to you; (2) how a director captures the rawness of the exchange between the two actors; and (3) how natural would the delivery be of each line. I think the third point is very important. Some actors have this tendency to talk in a certain kind of perky tone that makes it sound superficial. Thank goodness, both Ian and Pao were really great in this scene.

Of course, the most well-known example for a good conversation scene is the entire Before trilogy – it remains the gold standard for exhibiting the power and the magic of conversations, of an entire film with just these two people talking and forming connections. While this dinner scene isn’t exactly a Before levels type of perfection, to me it was a perfect scene in the face of BL series and the Philippines TV landscape in general.

𝗚𝗮𝘆. 𝗕𝗮𝗸𝗹𝗮. 𝗕𝗮𝘆𝗼𝘁. 𝗕𝗮𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴. 𝗝𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝘀𝗮𝘆 𝗶𝘁. 𝗜𝘁 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱𝘀 𝗻𝗼 𝗲𝘂𝗽𝗵𝗲𝗺𝗶𝘀𝗺. 𝗜𝘁’𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗮𝗻 𝗶𝗻𝘀𝘂𝗹𝘁.

One of the things best highlighted in this scene is when Karl did the gesture with his hand. That is unfortunately common in the Philippines, with people literally doing it to your face when they ask you. Or some of them done behind your back with matching giggling and knowing looks. I should know because I’ve seen it among my relatives when they try to refer to or describe a cousin or an uncle who is gay or might be gay. Karl was conditioned to think this way, and it’s no surprise that he would struggle to ask the question and get the word out. Meanwhile, Vlad is confident in his own skin. He doesn’t miss a beat and tries to get Karl to say the words in a way that both lectures him and encourages him.

This is what makes the scene purely amazing. It is confrontational, but it is not dramatic. It isn’t even preachy at all. It’s just a seemingly ordinary conversation between two people over a meal, trying to get to know and understand each other. You really got to hand it to Severo for constructing a dialogue this way because it also brings out both of Karl and Vlad’s current disposition. Moreover, this topic is a big deal and there are a lot of conversations that need to be had around it. But this scene easily summed it up around that one simple gesture. In less than a minute, it was able to tell you that being called gay, bakla, bayot, bading is not an insult. No grand monologue was needed.

Aside from that iconic exchange, I also loved the second part of it. It’s not going around much on Twitter so I can see some people reacting to the earlier exchange as if Karl was really just insulting Vlad. But the deal here is, Karl is also in the process of unlearning his bias and conditioning. He grew up in a household where his Dad would take digs against his gay uncle, Tito Santi. There’s even a hint of Tito Santi being physically hurt by his father if he’s “babakla-bakla” (basically another insulting way of saying lalambot-lambot). You can just imagine how difficult it must have been for him to grow up and feel like he needs to follow a certain path that his parents see for him.

Hence, when confronted by Vlad with the question, “Ikaw ba, bakla ka?” he was defensive. His tone shot up much higher than normal and was almost panicked. You can literally feel all of his guard come up. Vlad asked him why he was acting like he just accused him of a crime, and to his credit, Karl immediately apologized. But again, I just really understand Karl and I can’t wait for him to really see himself and get to know himself. There is so much about him that I am interested to learn and for him to learn as well about himself. I always see him as like a kid learning to take his first steps – he stumbles but tries to stand again even for just the sake of himself. His many mess-ups in life make his character compelling… and I guess this is just me on my #ProtectKarlAgenda.

Interestingly, as per Direk JP, above scene references an iconic scene from Jose Javier Reyes’ 1993 rom-com film MAY MINAMAHAL which, coincidentally, I just watched last month when I found its restored version on iWant. Amazing as well that the specific scene of them having a meal together was really my favourite from the film because it was a turning point for Carlitos (Aga Muhlach) and Monica (Aiko Melendez). It was when they finally start to get to know each other because for the longest time, they would just flirt in the cafeteria. It was a fitting reference because for Karl and Vlad, they are already starting to get to know each other by sharing even a small part of themselves. I also find it adorable watching Karl watch Vlad messily eat his food. I live for those small soft moments because it just seems so pure and innocent.

All in all, the dinner scene truly delivered. It was iconic and powerful. Major props to Gege and Direk JP, but also to both Ian and Pao. I loved how Pao was able to capture Karl’s reluctance and embarrassment, and Ian just exudes the confidence you need to see in Vlad. How can I describe this connection? Magnetic, I guess? They can easily throw these lines at each other, sustain the tension, and kind of just get lost in it. At every turn, Vlad has the power in this scene as he tries to pull Karl towards him, but also Karl stands on his own ground despite being unsure. I appreciate that about Karl – his life can be a mess, but he never really loses his sense of self and principles.

Finding a home

Aside from everything that happened in this episode, one of the things that I definitely loved is its subtle hint of these two people finding a home in each other. The most striking line for me, really, was when Karl asked Vlad, may nahanap ka na bang mauuwian? I like that this can translate to have you found a place to stay in? and have you found a place to go home to? The episode had such a great run in double meanings, and this one takes the cake more than anything. Karl was starting to feel guilty about kicking out Vlad, and it also happens that over his phone call with Tito Santi, he told him to always find a way to repay kindness with paying it forward to another person or to the community. Luckily, Vlad went back to his apartment to use the restroom.

When Vlad was about to leave, Karl called him back and asked, “Nag-dinner ka na ba?”

Vlad stayed for dinner.

When Vlad was done with dinner and was about to leave again, Karl stopped him and said, “Dito ka na lang matulog.”

Vlad stayed the night.

When Vlad was about to leave to come live with his ex-boyfriend after cooking breakfast as a thank-you, Karl offered him a place to stay, “Will you be my housemate?”

Vlad said yes and stayed.

Epilogue

In today’s epilogue, Karl is still seated on his side of the couch, but Vlad this time was standing at the back of the other side, leaning forward. A stuffed whale occupies the space beside Karl. Every now and then, the two of them would look at each other but it is Karl who would often glance back at Vlad – as to what his eyes are telling him, I don’t know. But if I am allowed to guess, perhaps he was trying to get him to sit beside him? Perhaps, as the closing note goes, there is always a space for Vlad there.

Comments; Ramblings

It’s only the second episode but Gaya is already sparking conversations and it does it in such an engaging way for its many fans. For me, this one really sets the foundation for what is yet to come for the story of Karl and Vlad. If anything, this episode emphasizes that struggle will always be a part of queer love, at least in our current socio-political climate. It isn’t just in regard to identity, but also with everything that comes with the acceptance of who you are by yourself and the Other.

For the pilot episode discussion, I talked about how there seems to be a running theme in this show about seeing – of looking at yourself, the other, or a beloved. This episode shows us Karl seeing Vlad; closely and slowly starting to unravel what it was about him that compels him. For Vlad’s part, I’m pretty sure he’s starting to see who Karl is, too. I feel like him feeling comfortable enough with the idea of staying in Karl’s place and actually living with him over the sem break is an indication of strangely feeling at ease (home?) with someone he just met.

The concept of persons as homes takes me back to a post from a Facebook page called Bibliophile, which was lifted from a poem written by Warsan Shire called ‘For Women Who Are Difficult to Love’: “You can’t make homes out of human beings. Someone should have already told you that.” This episode made me think a lot about that. On one hand, it feels romantic and uplifting to know that you have someone you can call your home, someone you can always return to as Yiu-fai put it in HAPPY TOGETHER [1997]. On the other hand, it feels scary because people change and if today the door and the windows are open, it might not be the same the next day. But I suppose I can feel hopeful for both Karl and Vlad. Perhaps, the door to Karl’s apartment will always be open for Vlad and the space beside the couch will always be reserved for him.

Gaya Sa Pelikula airs new episodes every Friday 8PM (Manila time) on Globe Studios’ Youtube channel.

GAYA SA PELIKULA Ep 01 Review [x]

#gaya sa pelikula #like in the movies #pangpang #ian pangilinan #paolo pangilinan #pinoy bl #filipino web series #filipino bl #boys love #juan miguel severo #jp habac #gsp review #owned

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ofgoodmenarchive · 3 years

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The first in a series of drabbles exploring my Blood Mage!Dorian AU.

Priceless Rewards

It was a beautiful day in the south and Dorian was terribly bored.

Alright, so maybe 'beautiful' was a stretch- but there was no rain, which by Ferelden standards counted for beauteous. Still the sky was dreary- even here in the Hinterlands, the so called 'Heart of the South'. Constant damp livened the vegetation- everything was so green- and so in his way! He couldn't walk two steps without having to wrestle nettles or vines from his robes.

Why did I agree to this again?

They needed someone not overtly suspicious, he supposed- at least, not suspicious in a particular manner. Dorian could be suspected of many things; by his appearance alone he could be accused of blood magic and perhaps some dubious forms of necromancy. Why else adorn himself in human bones, how else to explain the flash of amber that sometimes possessed his eyes?

Altogether, Dorian ascertained he had to be wearing a whole person- and that excluded his staff, shaped from a spine and skull.

Not all the same person, mind you. Still not a welcoming sight to most.

Granted none were innocent in his eyes- all had threatened his survival in one way or other.

Besides- as long as no one suspected him of working with the Venatori, it didn't matter how he was judged. His employers knew that- and Dorian knew he needed gold and influence to maintain the lifestyle craved by his inner demon.

So there he was, traipsing through the south with a sack full of magical equipment, questing to study Rifts for a group of mad cultists.

I don't know why they're bothering...

What did exploding an old woman and her Chantry puppets really achieve?

From his viewpoint, it merely added complication- now there was this 'Herald of Andraste' for the fools to contend with.

Why can't people just appreciate life for what it is?

He considered to himself with a laugh, kicking aside more vines.

Then again- if the world lacked such madmen, who would risk contracting Dorian for anything? An open practitioner of blood magic, long-disgraced from his house? Of course whenever someone sought him out, their motivations were not exactly chivalrous.

While pondering this he approached a Rift and began work. Recognising him as one of their own, the demons barely glanced.

Speaking of which- he was really in need of proper sustenance. Food and wine can fulfil Desire for only so long- especially while sleeping out in the cold wild and not luxurious sheets.

Technically his employers were to blame- anyone with sense was hiding and anyone who might be some fun was miserable. Not that he faulted the local populace for cowering from demons, Templars, mages, holes in reality and Maker knows what else.

Well. Us, for one. We're here too.

It was gradually creating an issue. Desire's primary source of nourishment came from the desire of others. For Dorian, this meant fuelling himself through a man's desire towards him. When times were well and the populace cheerful, no matter his place he could easily find a willing participant.

However when times were tougher or in this case, when fear of magic and the unknown ran rampant, meeting someone receptive was trying.

Actually...when you think about it-

this whole thing is Halward's fault.

A phrase Dorian said to himself often, spitting his father's name like a curse.

Just as often, he would sense the demon admonish what it viewed as weakness.

Well am I wrong?

We wouldn't have met if it weren't for him.

Waiting for devices to conclude their measurements, he plopped onto the grass and reminisced.

Dorian had been just a boy, as belligerent a youth as could be. Or that's how his father would excuse it, he was sure.

Perhaps Halward even liked that about his son- sometimes. When he put it to use, when his belligerence somehow went hand-in-hand with achievement.

Not when it caused him to loudly reject their plans, state he'd rather die than live in denial of himself, then run off into the night.

If he hadn't found me...everything might be different.

Unfortunately Halward ferreted him out somehow. What happened next was a tangle of memory and emotion- what he did recall, was standing in a circle of fire while a voice hissed through his mind.

Small. Such a small morsel.

What does the human think I can do with this?

A sensation like needles puncturing his skull. He'd cried out but couldn't move. The creature burrowed into his consciousness, processed and digested in seconds.

Oh...?

So much desire.

Ambition.

Potential.

His heart drummed, limbs shaken- but still he was incapable of movement. All he saw was flame and all he heard was this ravenous intruder.

A small meal...but still a meal.

I could take it all.

That's what he wants me to do, you know.

Whether through his own discernment or whatever link was strung between them, he understood what the creature meant. Panic increasing, Dorian's thoughts raced, floundering to convey them-

So he told you 'oh go eat this desire for me', and you're just going to do it?!

Aren't you a Desire Demon?!

Don't you want to experience life?!

Instead you're just going to- going to-

have a little snack and slink back into the Fade?!

When we can both maximise our potential- together?!

The voice fell silent, pensive. Dorian stammered to solidify his point.

Just- just don't change who I am- that's all I ask.

It had fulfilled that promise- for the most part. When Dorian awoke he'd been in his bed, unchanged in every way that mattered to him.

Turning around, a pair of void-black eyes peered back and he'd screamed.

That was the first encounter with his shadow. It was structured vaguely as he was, had his voice, developed as he did. Yet was just a walking silhouette- that only he could see.

Thankfully his demon's wanderings were on an inconsistent basis.

However it didn't take long for Halward- and everyone else, really- to note Dorian changed in every way they hadn't instructed.

Always a morbid child, fixated on necromancy and the dead. His bond with the demon increased this fixation tenfold. Before then, Dorian sometimes preserved deceased animals and toyed with the idea of reviving them with Fade-Wisps. Now it was an unseemly habit- which his family loathed. Cheerful, bumbling creatures of bone and treated flesh roamed the estate, causing minor chaos and disrupting social events.

Eventually his father screamed at him-

“Dorian Pavus! Clear this undead menagerie or I will take care of them myself!”

“I WILL NOT!” He'd shrieked back, tossing mice-bones across his bedroom.

Halward did take care of them himself- to the boy's heartbreak and despair. By that point he knew there was discussion of somehow altering him again- he ran and this time, was free.

Feeling nostalgic?

Desire lured him to the present moment- sitting cross-legged on a nearby rock-pile, seeming amused in it's posture. His shadow- not nearly as intimidating as it had been to him years ago. Dorian smiled, sighing wistfully.

“Something like that...I think it's more that I'm under-stimulated.”

His companion mirrored this need with a drawn-out exhale.

“Yes, yes, I know...but when we're done with this, we'll be paid, and then we can head somewhere people aren't so actively terrified for their lives.”

It hummed lowly at this but issued no official complaint. Overall the creature was content in deferring to his judgement- Dorian had never steered them wrong. They were usually well fed, occupied by an exciting project and comfortable- this whole apocalypse business was an unplanned circumstance. Even Dorian hadn't known the Venatori's goals- merely sought to benefit.

The creature's focus appeared to divert- features unobscured enough to gather simple expression.

“Hrm? Someone there?” He wondered aloud, glancing. Activity further along- a loose group of people trudging through under-brush, chatting casually though he couldn't hear. Dorian lingered at first but soon recognised the Inquisition symbol- a single, glaring eye.

“Not the people we should try explaining ourselves to, I think.” He decided, chuckling in exasperation. Dorian scooped up his instruments and willed his form to move; vanishing with a flash of embers, he materialised behind some trees and knelt. One advantage to his demonic condition was an ability to veil himself- as long as he didn't do anything too attention-grabbing. Standing around in the open was therefore not viable, so he watched and waited.

Two humans, a dwarf and an elf. A human woman and the elf appeared to lead the pack, both bearing the Inquisition crest. The group ventured for the Rift and Dorian frowned, wondering for their sanity.

A dazzling beam shot outwards, leading his gaze to the elf's hand- connecting him and the Rift. Next there was an explosion and the party launched into combat, too confusing and swift for Dorian to properly assess. By the end all demons and disruptions were extinguished and the elf stood to one side, surveying the area.

Dorian couldn't make out terribly much- obvious details; the radiance emitted by his hand and the weapon used in lieu of a staff, a sword-hilt with light where there would be steel. Dark hair, pale, Dalish- judging by the blue patterns decorating his face. Much taller than elves inclined towards being- he loomed over his party and seemed awkwardly aware of it, stooping whenever one moved to speak with him.

Each person drifted to scout the clearings edge and Dorian sat perfectly still. None wandered his direction and the elf appeared disinterested, loitering where the Rift had been dispelled.

Until he abruptly turned and marched almost straight for Dorian. Stopping just as suddenly, he peered down at scorched earth left by the maleficar's retreat.

Maker's breath!

Don't tell me he's going to notice me because of that?!

He was near enough for Dorian to study closer- light scarring on serious features, frosty eyes that pierced everything they saw.

Intense- but attractive. Perhaps more-so because of that intensity.

For a few heartbeats he was certain he'd been spotted- but the elf swivelled away, muttering.

“Something wrong?” The woman asked, her voice distinctly Nevarran.

“Burnt ground. I thought it odd.” He answered, falling in pace with his fellows.

“Why odd? It would be from a demon, no?”

“I saw none there when we fought.” His speech was a little stilted- possibly more accustomed to his native tongue.

“From the Rift, then. It hardly matters.”

Their discussion was swallowed by forest and Dorian sprang forth, unleashing his shock.

“That's the Herald?!” He exclaimed, laughing in charmed bewilderment.

Feeling eyes upon him, Dorian faced his shadow- standing within the tree-cluster, watching it's host ponderously.

Without speech or much communication at all, he knew they thought as one.

Dorian tossed the bag of instruments to the ground and booted it aside, half-snarling, half-laughing.

“To the void with this dirty work!” Meeting his companion's gaze, he smirked. “I just thought of a reward the Venatori can't possibly hand over to us!”

Vague contours of the creature's mouth parted, displaying pointed teeth in a grin.

The Herald of Andraste.

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getitinbusan · 4 years

Text

Jaebeom -

Only Love

Part 6 - Nervous

Y/N doesn’t want a relationship, especially not with an idol. Jaebeom only wants her.

Love after heartbreak and all the things that fall in between.

Angst, Cheating, Fluff, Smut

A new series inspired by lyrics, each chapter has a specific song that goes with it.

The Scene

The Masterlist

Nervous - K Flay

I'm writing this from your bed while you're in the other room

I like what you do to me, and I wanna tell you soon.

The ride was quiet, you tucked your head under Jaebeom's arm, the vehicle's movements making you sleepy. He held your hand like a nervous high school boy, afraid what he really wanted to happen was about to happen.

The car pulled up to the front of his place and he smiled nudging you awake. "We're here."

Drunk and groggy you looked around, "where's here?"

He put his arm around your waist to keep you from falling over, "You're at my place, in Hannam. Remember? You asked me to bring you home?"

You looked him up and down giggling, "Yeah I did."

Trying to balance you and getting his key in the lock he finally got the door open. At least 5 cats came running to greet him, "Oh my God JB, you're a crazy cat lady!"

"This is why I can't have friends over," he picked up the smallest fluffy one and kissed it's head.

The pretty little Siamese brushed against your leg until you picked her up. He looked shocked, "She doesn't like anyone."

"You purred into her fur, "Well I'm not just anyone, am I?"

"Clearly."

He walked over and took the cat from your arms, "Let's take care of you. What can we do to minimize the hangover you're going to have in the morning?"

He held your face in his hands. "What do you need?"

You were feeling a little dizzy, whether it was from the alcohol or his proximity you couldn't be sure.

"Maybe some fresh air, water...your arms to keep me from falling over." You propositioned.

He slid the balcony door open and led you outside. "You're going to have to hold onto the rail till my arms get back."

The air was cool and you closed your eyes inhaling deeply, everything felt right.

Perched atop the Seoul Skyline the stars shone brightly in the astronomical twilight. In the grand scheme of all the overblown things that had taken place in the last few months, you were still just a small player in a larger roll occurring around you.

A helicopter broke through the silence of the night "Uh-oh, looks like Dispatch tracked you down already."

You shot him a look, "what, too soon?"

He passed you a glass and an aspirin, "Drink."

He stood close beside you, leaning on the rail staring out at the city. You walked your hand over closing the distance until it touched his.

"I want to apologize."

He cut you off, "you really don't have to, you didn't do anything wrong."

He brought his hand the rest of the way to lay over top of yours.

"I'm pretty sure you once told me to never apologize for showing your feelings because if you do you're apologizing for the truth."

Amazed you turned to him, "You remember me saying that?"

He nodded as you moved towards his lips.

He pulled back, "Y/N, you're drunk, I've already ruined our first kiss I'm not going to let you forget the second."

"You're a good guy JB"

He wrapped his arms around you and rested his chin on your head.

"Unfortunately I am...so I'm going to have to send you to bed."

You looked up at him with big eyes and a pout, "You don't want to sleep with me?"

"Jesus Christ, you think I don't want you? You're really making me question my morals right now."

He ran his hand up your arm and sighed while spinning you back towards the door.

Flipping the switch his bedroom lit up before you.

"It's so cozy Jaebeom-ah. Cats, Plants, nice sheets...how are you still single?"

He handed you a t-shirt from his drawer, "I was kind of hoping I'm not anymore…you can sleep in this."

You grabbed it looking upset, "I'm going to feel bad if you sleep on the couch."

He undid the zipper that ran up the back of your dress. "You're going to feel bad in the morning anyway plus you're not even going to remember this conversation."

You broke out the pout again, "What if I get scared or lonely?"

He bent down and picked up the cat that had followed you since you arrived.

"Nora is the best company and she wouldn't dare let anything happen to you." He kissed your forehead and pointed, "Bed, now."

He was still laughing at you as he turned off the light and closed the door.

______________

You woke up in the huge bed, alone save for the tiny cat curled up into your side. The smell of coffee wafted under the door calling you to get up but your head swam in scenarios.

You remembered him being a complete gentleman, you remembered falling asleep against the pillow that smelt like him, you remembered...he was just on the other side of the door.

You liked it here, you didn't want to leave. You wanted him to know you weren't a waste of time, you'd already lost so much of it by pushing him away.

Grabbing your phone you composed your words into a poem you needed him to hear.

I was fine on my own, every night I slept alone

The distance kept me safe

It's easier to fake the feel than dance around with something real

Promises might break

Then you came along and said that I was different

You were missing something and it felt like we should see

Normally, I'd fall away, your face is a distraction

But I like the way that you're distracting me

I went home before my friends so I could hear your voice again

But it feels strange to care

I hesitate to say out loud that when I'm drunk and in a crowd

I pretend you're there.

We watch the helicopters from the top of your apartment

And all I could think is I don't want to leave

Normally, I'd fall away, your face is a distraction

But I like the way that you're distracting me

I'm writing this from your bed while you're in the other room

I like what you do to me, and I wanna tell you soon.

Maybe you'll shy away, maybe you'll fall apart

It's hard being honest, but I'm being honest

Get in the play, running your fingers through my hair

Don't wanna behave, how do you act when no one's there?

Feeling inside, feeling a way, it's different and it's working

Oh, you make me nervous, oh, you make me nervous

You read it over and flopped back on his pillow...send…you heard his notification go off ….you waited.

____________

There was a soft knock before he turned the handle.

He looked beautiful standing in the doorway. His pajama pants hung low on his waist, it was the first time you'd caught a glimpse of his body and your breath hitched at the sight.

Wrapped in nothing but his sheet you pulled the covers back in invitation.

He walked over to where you sat, "Is this what you really want?"

You bit your lip and nodded.

He pulled his pants off letting them fall to the ground and he crawled in beside you.

His hands drew through your hair and his lips found their way to yours...properly, undisturbed, no flashbulbs to commemorate the event. It was soft and languid, his tongue taking its time to explore your mouth.

He pulled away to stare at you, "Tell me I can finally have you."

"All of me Jaebeom...I'm yours."

He caressed your face, thumb sliding between your lips, over your chin and down your neck as he kissed into the crevice of your collar bone.

It had been so long, yet it had never felt like this. You could feel his desire with every touch, his lips, his fingertips and his hard cock pressed up against your hip.

"I want you so bad J," your hands tugged through his hair as you wrapped your leg around his body to guide him in closer.

"Shit..Shit...do you have a condom? I just never thought this would happen..fuck"

You both collapsed back onto the bed breathing heavy.

"Ugh, no," you sighed frustrated.

He put both hands over his face, disappointed that even this moment couldn't go smoothly.

You rolled into his side, "I never stopped taking the pill...and after what happened, I did get tested...I mean, if you're not okay with it..it's okay...we can wait."

He placed his hand on your cheek and kissed you softly, "I haven't been with anyone in years, it's mandatory we get tested during our physicals…"

"Fuck thank God!" You rolled on top of him and ground yourself over him.

Laying kisses down his chest you let your fingers skim lightly over his abs. His skin tingled with goosebumps under your touch and you felt him twitch at your center.

"Are you ready?"

He nodded biting his lip, "Please."

He held your hips as you lined yourself up over him. Not breaking eye contact you slowly lowered yourself, taking him into you.

You felt like you could cry, it had been so long since you'd let yourself feel the intimacy of giving yourself to someone.

You both moaned in unison as he hit your cervix. "You feel so good," he sighed.

You didn't move, you wanted to feel him in you, feel him filling you, this wasn't just sex. You were both here, in the same place at the same time feeling the same thing.

There was no past, only two people fusing themselves to one another's future.

You began rocking your hips. Looking down his face was focused, beautiful, lost. His lips were parted and soft breaths escaped from between them every time you met back together.

He held you pressed against him as he sat upright. Brushing away your sweaty hair he kissed your neck, your shoulders and down to your breasts. He touched them reverently, his fingertips brushing lightly over your nipples making you clench around him.

His face scrunched up, "oh my god baby, you can't do that.. it feels too good."

Pushing his hair back you placed kisses all over his face, "We can do this all day, as many times as we want, I'm not going anywhere."

He secured his arm around you and flipped you onto your back.

Hands on both sides of your face he rolled his hips into you. He hit different, deeper, the repetitive sliding building up the orgasm inside you.

It wasn’t rushed but it was excited, your hands, mouths and bodies had no motive other than providing each other pleasure.

Wrapping both legs around him you held him tightly against your core. "I'm so close Jaebeom, so close..."

Your head was thrown back and your hands gripped the pillows beside you. You felt him cumming, spilling out of you as he continued. He didn't give up until your nails were dug deep into his skin and he could feel you pulsing around him.

He collapsed on top of you trying to catch his breath, "Are you okay? Was it okay?"

You couldn't help but smile at his sincerity, "It was perfect."

Your voice trailed off and immediately noticing, he sat up to look at you.

"I'm scared Jaebeom, I don't want this to start wrong, I don't want to keep us a secret."

"Then let's not." He grabbed his phone and held it up to take a picture.

"Are you fucking nuts?" You asked while hiding in the sheets beside him.

He tapped the keys, "What are you writing?"

He wouldn't answer you, "Jaebeom-ah, give me the phone...stop!"

Smiling he hit SHARE and handed it to you.

What you need to know:

1: I am in love with a girl and I think that she's in love with me.

2: I am incredibly happy.

What you don't need to know:

1: Anything else about us.

2: Especially not why I'm in bed at 2:30 in the afternoon

3: Or that Y/Ns hiding under the covers beside me.

#Jaebeom #lim jaebum #lim jaebeom #jaebum #jay b #got 7

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sope-and-shine · 4 years

Text

Christmas Special: Day 21

-> Pairing: Dog Hybrid!Jeongguk x Cat Hybrid!Reader // Yoongi x Named OC(Ara) -> Hybrid!AU // Fluff and sadness -> Word Count: 3.3k -> Summary: Being the last hybrid in the shelter for Christmas isn’t what you want, but maybe Santa will have a better plan for you. -> Warning(s): Abandonment // cute little boy

A/N: I kinda wanna make this a series, so let me know what y’all think.

Family has always been your number one priority. It’d been instilled in you since you were a kitten, and you’ve always taken pride in taking care of your loved ones when you could. Growing up with two younger brothers made that easy - Jimin and Taehyung always did manage to get themselves in trouble - and with you being 8 years older than them, it made taking care of them a lot easier. The three of you were separated from your mother after a bad storm when you were only 11 and your brothers were 3. You’d been scared and worried about hybrid control finding you before you could make it to your mother, and you were sure that you would be separated for good. But Mrs. Kim - the nice, old lady that you live with now - took you in and promised to keep you safe. She found you outside of her little tea shop carrying both of your brothers soaked to the bone, and she had no problem bringing you in to the warmth of her own home.

To give you and your brothers a new one.

During the day you helped Mrs. Kim with her everyday chores and running the shop, keeping an eye on your brothers playing with toys in the corner near the window at the front of the shop. You taught your brothers everything that your mother taught you, and you taught yourself as much as you could when everyone was asleep. Day after day you would do your best to be just like your mother, so that your brothers had someone to look up to. Being with Mrs. Kim gave you that opportunity to take care of them and give them a better chance in this world for what the 3 of you were, and if they were lucky then they’d find a home or a job with someone who would appreciate the work that you put into raising them. You spent 6 years raising them with Mrs. Kim at your side to take care of you, until the day she fell.

And then she was gone.

It wasn’t that she didn't make the fall, but she had to be placed in the care of someone who could do a better job than you could. She had to leave you, and that meant you’d be given to someone new. It meant that your brothers would be given to someone new, and there was no guarantee that this new owner would be kind, or that they would even take both of them. There was a chance that no one would take either one of them, and that scared you the most! Hybrid’s left in shelters for so long never stood a good chance, and there was always the possibility of being sold to a warehouse for constant, grueling labor with poor conditions. If your brother’s ended up in a position like that, you would actually keel over and die from heartbreak.

But someone seemed to be looking out for you.

After Mrs. Kim’s fall and she was moved to her new home where she could be watched 24/7 by trained nurses and hybrid’s, her son placed you and your brothers in the best care he could on behalf of his mother. Seokjin had two hybrids of his own at home on top of his three children, and you could understand why he couldn’t take your brother’s. Thankfully, he knew someone who ran a shelter unlike any other shelter in the city. A shelter that ensured the safety of their hybrids and didn’t allow anyone to leave with a hybrid without a full background check. Min Yoongi built his shelter from the ground up with his older brother when he turned 22 - as you learned when you first arrived with your brothers - and he’s kept it running by himself with the help of his volunteers and his wife Ara.

It’s a large building that’s set up like a cafe in the front with a children’s themed cafe for the younger hybrids next to the counter. A small hallway runs between the kids cafe and the counter, leading to the back of the building where small rooms are built for said hybrids. It’s like a small hotel, enough to keep them safe, warm, and sane throughout their stay until they were placed in a good home. Everyday when you first arrived, Yoongi would appear in the small room he’d set up for you and your brothers at the back of the large shelter to bring you breakfast. He was used to hybrids being uncertain when they first arrived, especially older hybrids that didn’t have good experiences from their youth to now.

“You don’t have to join us if you don’t want to, but my wife and I will be around all day, okay? Anything that you need, we can get it for you.” He said to you. Everyday he assured you that he and his wife would help you in anyway they could, and he kept true to his word. He fed the three of you, clothed you and your brothers, helped to teach you and your brothers, and he did his best to find the most trustworthy owners for you and your brothers.

Unfortunately, just as you thought, you and your brothers wouldn’t be able to stay together forever. Ara managed to find the perfect owner to take in your brothers, and after meeting with them in the cafe 8 times just to be sure...you didn’t have it in your heart to keep them from a better life. A man named Jung Hoseok, his heart shaped smile and the pure joy he showed when interacting with your brothers was the true deal sealer to give you the strength to let them go. The 3 of you had never cried that much since Mrs. Kim had her fall and you all had to leave her, and watching them get in the car with Hoseok and driving away was the hardest thing you ever had to do. You were sad to see them leave, but every part of you knew that you had to.

Even if you would be alone.

Now, with the holidays approaching and the hybrids around you being adopted for children and those in need of company, you find yourself to be the only hybrid left in the shelter. It wasn’t like you really expected anyone to adopt you before the holiday, but you had hope that maybe one person would take you in. You’d taken to sitting at the table next to the window of the cafe drawing whatever came to your mind: sometimes your brothers, sometimes Mrs. Kim, and even the stray picture of Ara and Yoongi spraying whipped cream at each other. When kids come in to visit, they’ll sit with you and pet your ears while you draw and color for them. Adults come in to talk with you once in a while or get opinions on things that they’re unsure of, but they always leave when they’re done.

At least you’re no stranger to their absence.

Thankfully, Yoongi and Ara are not willing to let you continue on that way. When it came time for the shelter to close for Christmas and the couple to return to their home, they surprised you in the best way possible.

“You want to me to what?” You ask, staring at the two before you in disbelief as you try to grasp what they just said to you.

“We want you to join us for Christmas.” Ara repeats, holding a coat for you to take out into the cold air. Yoongi holds a bag, presumably with your belongings for the few days you’ll be with them.

You shake your head in confusion, “Why?”

Ara’s face drops immediately, in more shock than she should be after the years she’s spent doing this. “Sweetheart...the fact that you even have to ask that-”

“-We’re not leaving you alone for the holiday.” Yoongi says.

“We have plenty of space for you to join us, and I refuse to leave you here when you can spend Christmas with our family.” Ara assures.

They both look at you with such fondness and hope, that it’d be impossible for you to try and deny them anymore. You shrug, “I guess it would be rude to refuse.”

That’s how you find yourself being led into the tall apartment building the two have made a home in, being taken to a floor almost completely at the top of the building - in the elevator which was a very scary experience for you - and stopping in front of a door with a wreath hanging off of it and a doormat with a cat telling neighbors to kindly ‘go away’ instead of knocking. You could smell their dog hybrid all the way out in the hallway, and it made you nervous to think he’d be aggressive with you entering his territory.

Ara places a gentle arm over your shoulder, making you feel nice and protected from your worries, “It’s okay, Sweetheart, Jeongguk is a good boy. He wouldn’t hurt a fly.”

“Yeah, the real threat you need to worry about is-” Yoongi is cut off by a loud crash as soon as the door opens.

“Kookie! Throw Jun-Jun higher!” A small voice yells.

The three of you walk further into the apartment and find a small boy being held high above the floor while a boy about your age with fluffy brown hair and black ears, sweats with a fluffy black and brown tail peeking out and a t-shirt stares at the broken glass below him with wide eyes. His ears are up, and it’s clear he knows everyone is home now.

“Kookie will throw Jun-Jun higher as soon as Kookie cleans the glass.” He says to he little boy and breaking away from his chance. He rests the boy on his hip with a sigh and turns to offer the three of you a sheepish smile, “Hey guys. How was work?”

Ara turns away with a sigh, almost unbothered by the event like it happened every time they come home, “I’ll get the dustpan.”

“Just bring him over here and we’ll take care of it, Gukkie.” Yoongi instructs. He turns to you and wraps an arm over your shoulder with a welcoming smile before turning back to Jeongguk, “Come and meet (Y/n). She’ll be staying with us for the holiday.”

“Nice to meet you.” He nods. You watch as Jeongguk’s eyes stare directly at Yoongi’s hand placement, watching part of his tail wrap around the little boy in his arms. Nervous yourself, you nod back to him.

“Kitty~” Thankfully, little Jun was more than happy to save the awkward tension. His arms fly out to reach for you, wriggling as much as he can in the dog hybrids tight hold. He was excited to have a new friend, and it looked like Jeongguk was also trying to hold himself back from really greeting you in fear of how you would react. But the little boy was wanting to waste no time, “Jun-Jun want pretty kitty!”

You blush, a small smile etching on your face. He reminded you of your brothers when they were younger, and you wanted nothing more than to experience that again. Hesitantly, dropping your ears and trying to not make eye contact with the more dominant hybrid, you reach your arms out in want, “May I please hold him?”

Ara and Yoongi watch hesitantly as they watch Jeongguk think for a moment before he slowly walks closer with Jun, nodding and letting the little boy leap into your arms. It’s almost unreal for the two to watch your eyes light up and a smile they hadn’t seen since your brothers had helped to make a cake for you for your birthday. You looked like it was Christmas day already as you bounce the toddler happily in your arms like he were your own, and that made the two adults happy to see you pleased as well.

“We already ordered dinner for tonight, so it should be arriving soon. Why don’t the two of you play with Minjun and get to know each other while we get some plates ready?” Yoongi suggest.

Ara nods in agreement, “You both like to draw, maybe you can start with that.”

“You draw?” Jeongguk asks, his ear perking up.

You look to the floor, avoiding his eye contact and shrug, “I draw the people I see out the window when I’m at the cafe. It gives me something else to think about.”

“I used to live at the shelter with my brother too. Ara and Yoongi talk about you alot, and I know how you feel when it comes to being separated from family.” He explains.

“I’m sorry.” You mutter, unsure of what else you should say.

“It’s okay, I got to come here and get a new brother!” He says with a big, goofy smile. He turns to Minjun in your lap and gets face level with the boy. “Isn’t that right, Minjunnie?”

“Big brother Kookie is the best brother for Jun-Jun!” Minjun agrees, falling off of your thigh to reach out and give Jeongguk a sloppy kiss to his cheek. The both of them together made your heart feel a little more full than it had since your brothers left for Gwangju with Hoseok, and you just felt yourself feeling more and more relaxed as you continued to play and chat with them. Even through dinner, you were able to enjoy their company, along with the familiar, calming presence of Yoongi and Ara. It felt like you found a family you could trust, but their was still the fact that you’d be returning to the shelter once the holiday was over.

And then you’d be alone again.

When it came time to go to bed so Santa could come and surprise Minjun with his gifts, you were offered the spare bedroom across from his room and next to Yoongi and Ara’s. Jeongguk was right next to Minjun across from the bathroom, so it made it easier if something were to happen and Minjun needed something in the night. Minjun was actually intent on sleeping with both you and Jeongguk, but Ara was quick to talk him down for your sake. Though, the both of you did sit with him in his room to help him fall asleep.

“And then, the two little kittens jumped through the window and saved the Princess from the monster!” You tell, bringing the story based on your two brothers to an end. You watch as Minjun’s eyes try to close against his will, fluttering shut every now and then as Jeongguk strokes his hair.

“They sound so cool…” He mutters, hands holding your tail very gently as he continues to fight the sleep.

You smile, joining Jeongguk in moving stray strands of hair from Minjun’s face as his drift close, “They are! They fear no monster, and are praised when they return to the King with tales of their adventure.”

Eyes still closed, Minjun sighs, “I want...to do that too.”

“You can, Minjunnie.” Jeongguk assures him, nuzzling his nose into the little boys hair. It isn’t long before his soft snores finally reach your ears.

“He’s so easy to put to sleep.” You whisper, continuing to stroke the boys hair as he sleeps.

Guk laughs, “Yeah, it’s how you know he’s Yoongi and Ara’s kid.”

“I remember my brothers at this age. I forgot how much I missed it…” You sigh, remembering the days where you would tell your brothers story of your mother and cuddling with them until they fell asleep. It was nice to have someone to coddle again, especially someone you didn’t have to coddle alone. “He’s so cute.”

Jeongguk lays head head on the pillow above Minjun, beginning to feel drowsy himself, “I bet your brothers really miss you too. You seem like you took good care of them.”

You smile, “I like to think I did.”

You lay down with your head just above Minjun’s but lower than Jeongguk’s when he asks, “What do you think they’re doing now?” It’s a question that you think about a lot when you’re at the cafe or getting ready for bed in your now empty room in the shelter. It was nice to know where they were, but it was still heartbreaking that they were so far away.

You sigh, “Well. I hope they’re being given the best life their owner can offer them. I know he’s a good guy, so I’m not worried about their treatment, but I really hope they’re happy together.”

“They are.” Jeongguk assures, seeing the longing in your eyes. He could tell how well you took care of them, and he knows just how good Yoongi and Ara are at finding homes for their hybrids. He had faith that your brothers were okay.

“How do you know?” You ask, head tilted and ear folded. Jeongguk can’t stop himself from smiling at how cute you look, reaching over the sleeping child between you and scratching your ears.

“I can feel it.” He assures you, making sure to be gentle as he continues his petting.

By the time morning comes, the both of you don’t even realize you fell asleep in Minjun’s bed beside him. It’s only when the little boy begins jumping up and down excitedly on top of the both of you that you even realize where you’d fallen asleep. Thankfully, with Minjun dragging you to the living room to look at presents instead of the fluffy haired canine hybrid, you have no time to feel embarrassed at sharing a bed with him.

As soon as Minjun finishes waking up his parents and they both begrudgingly leave the safety of their bed for their sons happiness, you all settle in by the tree filled with presents and begin to unwrap the treasures left for you. Gifts from husband to wife, gifts to a child disguised as a beloved holiday figure, and gifts to not one but two hybrids under the tree. It’s a happiness you didn’t think you’d get to experience again, and you’re more than happy to share it for one day with people that seemed to genuinely care about you.

“I have one more present.” Ara announces. She reaches around the side of the couch and pulls out an orange bag with purple and pink tissue paper sticking out. She places it right on top of Yoongi’s lap and pulls out her phone with a smile, “Open it.”

Yoongi is hesitant with Ara filming him, but complies anyways. He pulls at the flimsy paper until he pulls out a baby binky, staring at it like he was suddenly constipated until his face lights up in realization. He turns to her with a sudden gleam of happiness, “Are you serious?”

“That’s why I’ve felt the need to be more gentle around you.” You says, now realizing why you’ve felt so attached to her recently. She was pregnant, and you had subconsciously known this whole time.

Yoongi’s eyes are brimming with tears as he leans into his wife’s shoulder and pulls her close. He can’t express his emotions well enough in this moment of surprise, “Angel, I’m really happy…”

“So am I. Especially since we still want to add one more person to our little family besides baby #2.” She says, now turning to face you instead. Her smile doesn’t leave her face as she continues just staring at you with a look you can’t quite place.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” You ask. You don’t get it until you take one glance at Jeongguk and he nods to you, “Wait...you mean me?”

“Yeah, we mean you.” Yoongi assures, sitting up and wiping the tears from his eyes with his arm still firmly wrapped around his wife.

“Kitty stay!” Minjun cheers, clapping happily.

“So what do you say?” Ara asks.

Jeongguk places a hand on you shoulder and teasingly asks, “Kitty stay?” As if Minjun were the one asking you to stay with them. Even so, you can’t help the smile that spreads across your cheeks or the tears that fill your eyes.

You nod, “Kitty stay.”

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thisselflovecamebacktome · 3 years

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My personal connection with Taylor’s discography, part one: It’s Time To Go

No more “official” meanings for music. The world has progressed past having to consider “official” meanings of songs. I’m kidding... partially. Obviously I love connecting the dots with Taylor’s music as much as the next Swiftie, but my favourite aspect of listening to music is the emotional relatability of transferring it to events in my own life. I have also unfortunately been ridiculed for relating to romantic songs in non-romantic ways and so forth. So I’ve decided in a bid to normalise personal relatability to songs and just generally get my thoughts out there, I’m going to write out what these songs mean to me and how. Also a special shout out to @cowboylikedean who inspired this series with how Folklore and Evermore has been helping zir recover from zir heartbreak over the Supernatural ending.

Anyway, I’ve decided I’m working backwards with these because why not? I should probably also note that unless there are lyrical changes in a repeated part (mostly choruses), I’m only going to include each of those parts once as a way to reduce repeating myself. So let’s get started.

It’s Time To Go

As a whole, this song is a reassuring comfort that despite seeing my tendency to leave as a flaw caused by the trauma of staying too long in the past, it typically has served me well. Though, like many of Taylor’s songs, It’s Time To Go mostly reminds me of my family, there are aspects of past friendships that I definitely feel like I dodged a bullet with by leaving.

When the dinner is cold and the chatter gets old, you ask for the tab

To me, this line reminds me of my father and my relationship before I cut him off. Despite feeling like I was his favourite child for most my childhood, communication between us started breaking down in my teen years. By the time my family fell apart when I was 20, I felt like seeing him weekly for lunches was a chore I was doing ‘for old time’s sake’. As a whole, despite loving him, there was just no longer any common ground and it showed with most of that time being spent in awkward silences or silently nodding along to things we didn’t understand that the other person said until I guiltily gave my ‘well I guess I better be heading home’ line.

Or that moment again he's insisting that friends look at each other like that

When I was in my teen years, I was in an (partially non consensually sexual) abusive friendship. This line brought me right back to the beginning of that friendship when I’d vocalise that I, a person with a history of sexual violence before that, was uncomfortable at the way he would sexualise me or stare lustfully at me. And you guessed it, every time he’d try to gaslight me into thinking I was just making it up and ‘friends look at each other like that all the time’. This line also has a tinge of regret for me because looking but I wish I had accepted that it was time to go then as opposed to staying which led to the abuse.

When the words of a sister come back in whispers that prove she was not in fact what she seemed. Not a twin from your dreams, she's a crook who was caught

So these lines are interesting to me because outside of the generalised outro, it is the only part of this song that relates to two completely unrelated scenarios.

‘When the words of a sister come back in whispers to prove she was not who she seemed, not a twin from your dreams’ reminds me of the members of my family I thought I was close to growing up. Like these people spent my whole life telling me I was their favourite, telling me they’d provide if I needed anything and just generally put so much extra time and effort into me than my cousins and siblings. Then, when I begged for help, refused to even check in on me when my sister left and then told me they’d rather watch me starve and be homeless than step in and push my father to do the right thing by my mother, brother and I.

‘When the words... come back in whispers that prove she was not in fact what she seemed, she’s a crook who was caught’ meanwhile reminds me of an ex acquaintance from university. While I was not super close with her, she seemed decent enough so I introduced her to another now ex friend of mine in hopes that if I ever held events, I wouldn’t have to worry about her because she’d know at least one other person. While seemingly a small thing, this was a large step for me given how much the abusive friend mentioned above fucked me and past friendships up to the point this was the first time in six years I was introducing friends that hadn’t previously met to each other. And this girl knew that. She also knew that I was in a very vulnerable state given I had just cut off my father and was in between medications. Despite this, she spent the week she knew this other friend doing everything she could to fuck up our friendship and convince me that this other friend didn’t like/trust me, and unfortunately it worked.

That old familiar body ache, the snaps from the same little breaks in your soul. You know when it's time to go

This line feels very self explanatory. Sometimes you just need to trust your gut, even if it fucking kills you. Very much ‘I think I’ve seen this film before, so I’m leaving out the side door’ vibes.

Twenty years at your job then the son of the boss gets the spot that was yours

So to me, this line reminds me of the way my parents pinned my sister and I against each other, and in turn the resentment that causes when thinking about how I felt like I was damn near to the perfect daughter, stuck around for the ‘ugly’/hard parts that she didn’t and did everything I could for my parents and family in general just for everything to still revolve around my sister. Like my father chose ‘her’ (more like chose his own dishonesty and knew she’d put up with it for financial gain whereas I wouldn’t), my mother’s whole life revolves around her hurt for my sister rather than trying to have a relationship with me and my sister still got all of the support from the family despite being the one in the wrong. But here’s the thing, as much as I want to be bitter at her, she was a child when everything happened and couldn’t help that she was put in a good position and I wasn’t. It was the ‘boss’ of my adult family that chose that and that’s where the blame lays here.

Or trying to stay for the kids when keeping it how it is will only break their hearts worse

Ironically this line pretty much means the opposite to me. Like to me, this was how I felt trying to juggle relationships with both my parents after they split. Like my mother felt betrayed every time I went to see my father even though it was a precondition for him giving her money when he finally agreed to, and my father felt betrayed that I was his favourite yet opted to live with mum and support her. It was a lose/lose situation and the longer it went on, the worse the pain was for all three of us.

Sometimes giving up is the strong thing

Giving up on the abusive friend above was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. After having experienced the suicide of a close friend the year before, I had admittedly grown a supergirl complex where I felt like I had to save everyone, and knowing that this abusive friend was suicidal and still walking away despite my fears that he’d die in a way he wouldn’t have if I just stayed tore me apart emotionally and made me feel like I had failed and been weak as a friend. But ultimately it was the strong thing because I had to leave all my friends from that group behind as a result and start again.

Sometimes to run is the brave thing

So in the theme of ‘I’ve had to restart my life too many times from leaving everything behind’, we have the beginning, the first time I stood my ground and refused to go back to a situation that I was upset in. In sixth grade (final grade of elementary school where I am), I had an outburst with one of my friends about how I felt like I was her comedy/emotional punching bag. Her response? Make the whole year barring one guy hate me. That guy and my friends in the year below also got targeted for their choice to stay friends with me. By the end of the year, things started cooling down and she asked me to go to the same high school as 99% of the rest of the year and remain friends. I didn’t. I instead went to the opposing school with the bad reputation despite the idea of knowing no one and being alone scaring the shit out of me. Granted looking back it was kinda dumb to be scared given that I went from having 40ish kids in my year to like 120 (and would have been more if I went to that other school) so wouldn’t have had to deal with the false ultimatum of her or being alone anyway, but at the time it was a massive deal for me and the bravest thing I would do until leaving that abusive friendship years later.

Sometimes walking out is the one thing that will find you the right thing

Basically this just encapsulates leaving both friendship groups from above. Like leaving the elementary school group allowed me to find people who I didn’t feel I had to pretend around in high school and then leaving that high school group found me people who had common interests and wanted to challenge and grow beside me. In general, it really doesn’t feel like much is going well in my life right now, but the one thing I can say is that I finally feel like I am in a place where every friend that I have put effort into is meant to be in my life and deserves to be and I don’t feel like anything is missing on that front. So maybe it took 23 years, but at least I got there.

Fifteen years, fifteen million tears begging 'til my knees bled. I gave it my all, he gave me nothing at all then wondered why I left. Now he sits on his throne in his palace of bones praying to his greed. He's got my past frozen behind glass but I've got me

Family, family family. Quite frankly, I think these parts I wrote in an unsent letter to my father explain it best.

“And I’ve had to do it alone because the literal years I spent degrading myself into feeling like the child this family made me out to be and begging for an ‘adult’ to step in and help were met with apathy and in your case, fake apologies. And then each and every one of you has had the nerve to act like I abandoned you or that I am a thoughtless child who only won’t see you because mummy said no.”

“You have taken every part of my family, my mental health and potentially even my future away from me, and whether you care or not, that’s something you and I both have to live with for the rest of our days.”

I spent my whole childhood/very early adulthood seeing the signs of my sister slipping from us and trying to prevent exactly what ended up happening. I spent the following three years begging for people who could fix it to do so. And then when they refused, I somehow became the villain and ‘insane’ and ‘not a family person’ for leaving.

But at the end of the day, they lost a person that would have loved and done anything for them for a lifetime. I left with my self-respect, only losing fairweathered people who only liked the idea of me anyway.

And you know, you know, you know, you know when it's time to go. So then you go. You just go...

Going back to the main theme, sometimes you’ve just gotta trust your instincts and take that first step knowing you’re doing the right thing for yourself and walking towards what you need.

#taylor swift #it's time to go #evermore album #about me #did anyone ask for this? no. but I am annoying and plaguing your dashes with my thoughts and feelings anyway lmao

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tsunflowers · 5 years

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anime featuring adult women

there are a lot of great female characters in anime, but sometimes it feels like they’re all supporting characters in shows about men or they haven’t graduated high school yet. I wanted to compile a list of some anime with adult women front and center

kidou keisatsu patlabor on tv:

in the sci-fi future as imagined in 1988, human-piloted robots called labors are used regularly by all kinds of people, including criminals. to combat labor crime, the police develop a special unit of patrol labors—patlabor. instead of following the prestigious division one, we follow a cast of quirky characters in second-string division two, as they solve cases ranging from mundane to dangerous to paranormal

izumi noa, and why I love her:

she’s incredibly strong-willed and stubborn. she’ll stand up to anyone. she’s obsessed with labors, not just piloting them herself but repairing them and learning about new developments in the field. even though division two is primarily men and there is the “men at work” vibe of so much military and police fiction, noa fits in easily with the guys and no one excludes her. the few times people do question her skills bc of her gender, they’re immediately shut down

other women in the cast:

nagumo shinobu, the captain of division one. we never actually see her or her unit at work, but they have a great reputation. I just love her bc she’s very funny always shutting down the captain of division two and I like that in-universe there are women in leadership roles like this

kanuka clancy, a visiting cop from new york. her relationship with noa is very strong, definitely shippable. she’s adept with a gun, a sword, and a giant robot. she’s the serious member of the team who yells at the others for being dumb but there are still times where she goes completely off the rails and ignores the law to do what she knows is right

wotakoi: love is hard for otaku:

momose narumi is an office worker and a fujoshi. she wants to keep the fujoshi part a secret this time around because things went south for her at her last job once people found out she was an otaku, but it turns out several of her new coworkers are fellow nerds. most importantly, her game-loving childhood friend hirotaka works at the same company, and the two of them reconnect as friends… and soon more than friends. it’s a romance drama involving only nerds

momose narumi, and why I love her:

she’s a lot like your standard high school girl protagonist who runs out of the house because she’s late for school, but this time she’s late for work. she’s really funny and straightforward, except she thinks she has to hide that side of her at her job. she and hirotaka have a great childhood friends to lovers relationship. she’s kind of rude to him but he adores her (though he’s kind of bad at showing it). I love a cheerful girl/serious guy romance that’s done well and I think this one really is

other women in the cast:

koyanagi hanako, narumi’s new coworker who’s a fellow fujoshi. she’s also a cosplayer, specifically a crossplayer who specializes in cosplaying as handsome guys. she and narumi only met each other under their fandom nicknames before, but they were big fans of each other and hit it off instantly when they meet at work. they’re cute friends even if they always argue about who tops in their ships

psycho-pass:

in a futuristic society, people’s mental health is constantly measured by “psycho-pass” readings which track their emotional state and judge the likelihood that they will commit a crime. naive rookie cop tsunemori akane leads a team of enforcers, people who are considered “latent criminals” too dangerous to live in normal society but who are still useful to the police. akane develops a close relationship with enforcer kougami shinya in particular, but kougami has his own intense relationship with the elusive criminal makishima shogo. as the team of detectives investigate him, they uncover secrets about the system they never wanted to learn and their fates become entwined with makishima’s

psycho-pass is written by urobuchi gen (madoka magica, fate/zero) and if you’re familiar with him you know what to expect. the show is pretty grim and gory. content warnings for rape, violence, gore, body horror, police violence, the predatory lesbian trope, forced institutionalization, and probably a lot of other things I can’t remember. not a light watch, is what I’m saying

tsunemori akane, and why I love her:

she’s incredibly principled. she sticks to what she believes is right despite immense pressure. it’s precisely because she’s naive and doesn’t understand the system that she is able to fight against it. she grows a huge amount over the course of the series but she never loses her compassion or her sense of right and wrong. she’s pretty badass too

other women in the cast:

karanomori shion, a lab analyst at the public safety bureau. she’s your typical sexy and flirtatious anime character but I think her position within the setting is interesting. although she’s categorized as a “latent criminal” unfit for society, she seems to be valued more than the enforcers. she’s also bisexual and dating a woman, though she plays into the “bisexuals can’t settle down” trope a little. she is not actually the best character or peak representation but I’m pretty attached to her and a certain type of woman will be too

kunizuka yayoi, a lesbian former musician and the only female enforcer. she’s shion’s girlfriend. there is a predatory lesbian character in this series, but it’s not kunizuka. I think her being a lesbian is handled pretty well. she has romantic and sexual relationships with women that are important to her, but she doesn’t hate men or flirt with every woman she meets (traits I hate to see in lesbian characters written by men). she’s really serious and calm but still cute and I love to see her growing respect for akane over the course of the show

death parade:

two people wake up in a strange bar with no memory of how they got there. a mysterious man with white hair named decim and his assistant, a woman known only as “the black haired woman,” ask them to play a game. the games are both absurd and dangerous, and as the contestants play them dark sides of themselves are revealed. decim’s job is to judge them based on their behavior while playing the games, but the black haired woman’s influence causes him to wonder if he’s doing the right thing

like it says in the title, the anime deals with the topic of death, and death by suicide comes up as well. I don’t remember everyone’s backstories but I think violence and abuse come up several times. there are also mannequins that move around on marionette strings which is kind of freaky

the black haired woman, and why I love her:

it might be wrong to say that she’s the main character when she isn’t introduced until the end of the first episode and her name isn’t revealed for half the show but listen. she’s the emotional core of the show and the person who sets the events in motion. she’s a very emotional person and that’s her strength. her relationship with decim is the classic “woman teaches cold-hearted man to feel” trope but I think it’s an outstanding example bc it centers her emotional experience and the two of them are not explicitly in a romantic relationship. I’ve been trying to avoid spoilers but for her it’s almost unavoidable. I love the way that her story is slowly revealed over the course of the show culminating in an incredible sequence in episode 11. I think her depression is handled so well too. it’s heartbreaking

other women in the cast:

nona, the boss of the arbiters. she’s a schemer who knows a whole lot of things she’s keeping from everyone else. I really like her outfit above all else. baggy pants with suspenders… a great look

mayu, a high school girl who is a contestant in one of the games. she tries to be cutesy but is prone to anger and makes incredible faces. I like that she’s an obsessive fangirl character who’s played for humor but is also shown as being noble and sympathetic

sakura quest:

koharu yoshino is a woman who moved to tokyo to find a job but has no luck. when she finally gets a job offer, it’s to become “queen for a day” of rural manoyama village. upon arriving in manoyama, she learns that she was only hired because they thought she was someone else but they still want her to work there for an entire year. now she lives in a small town and is tasked with both revitalizing the citizens and drawing tourists in, along with the help of four friends. it may not sound funny and heartwarming but it really is. it’s a good story about connecting and reconnecting and also the head of the tourism board wears a chupacabra mask sometimes

the main characters, and why I love them:

koharu yoshino, queen of manoyama. her struggle in the job market is unfortunately relatable to many people today and I love that she wishes she could have a job as a queen. she’s great and she really comes to love the town despite everything

shiori shinomiya, a very sweet manoyama native. she’s almost too nice but it makes it all the funnier when she gets intense

maki midorikawa, an aspiring actor who is famous among manoyama citizens for a small role she played in the past. she’s serious about acting but her family wishes she would get a more stable job. she can be kind of rude but she does love her friends and her town

sanae kouzuki, a web developer who moved to manoyama to escape the intensity of city life and the negative effects it had on her mental health. the problem is she hates rural life and is afraid of bugs but is too proud to admit it on her blog. the only true city girl among the five

ririko oribe, my favorite of the five. she’s shy but loves cryptids and the occult. it’s very easy to read her as autistic and the other characters affirm her interests and behavior. her love of cryptids even helps the town out when Spanish tourists come in search of a local legend. her relationship with her grandma is really good as well, with the two coming to understand and love each other over the course of the show

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ty-talks-comics · 4 years

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Best of DC: Week of February 19th, 2020

Best of this Week: DCeased: Unkillables #1 - Tom Taylor, Karl Mostert, Trevor Scott, Neil Edwards, John Livesay, Rex Lokus and Saida Temofonte

Ahhh shit, here we go again. DCeased was awesome.

In much the same way that the original Marvel Zombies filled my heart with dread, DCeased absolutely blew my mind with the short six issues that it took place in. It was equal parts violent and heartbreaking as the heroes of Earth had to figure out a way to either stop the Anti-Life virus or die trying. We had a good spin off with the single issue, A Good Day to Die and now we have Unkillables, another spin off focusing on some of the more violent heroes and villains while the events of the main series unfold elsewhere.

The book begins on the first day of the Anti-Life virus being released as Deathstroke finds himself on a job in Kentucky. Throughout the original story, I did kinda wonder what people like him or the other assassins were up to, given that we saw a select number of other dead supervillains throughout like Giganta and Clayface. As Tom Taylor and Karl Mostert unfold the story we see that Slade Wilson was killing some infected Neo-Nazis before an attempt to renegotiate his price ends with him infected too.

Mostert and Taylor set this opening up in a very comedic way with the white supremacits running from something in the local church as Deathstroke looks on, puzzled as to why they’re running before taking a few out before heading inside. Mostert, Rex Lokus and I think Trevor Scott then give us an awesome single page of Slade facing down a horde of zombies with only his gun and a bloody sword. He looks like a badass and, in the following panels, proves it by killing them with ease.

Mostert doesn’t shy away from Slade’s brutal violence and shows how fluidly he can kill with dynamic poses as he shoots and slices multiple enemies at once. This accentuated by the excellently colored spurts of blood from the zombies and the gory detail of blood on the walls. There’s even a really good panel of one of the zombies being cut in half with Scott inking the silhouette as their blood and insides drip down. Even better is when Slade gets infected and violently rips his mask off before coming back to his senses while choking a guy.

Tom Taylor introduces a unique aspect here as Deathstroke returns to normal on the second day of the virus being introduced. As we learn later, it’s due to Slade’s unique super soldier DNA that allows him to fight off the infection, effectively being immune to a point. I can definitely see this being a double edged sword for him as the infection seems to last for a day before being purged from his system. This makes him unique amongst both the heroes and villains of Earth as maybe a potential savior.

I’d also like to praise Saida Temofonte for her amazing lettering as well. She does an amazing job, not only with word balloons, but with captions that have a bloody background and the typefaces she uses for sound effects. For the most part, they fit the gruesomeness of the story with intense and bloody BANGs to eerie RRRRRRs, signaling the incoming zombies. Deathstroke’s scream as he claws his own face is intense, scratchy and blood curling until we get an AMAZING title page with names filling the empty space.

As things progress, we cut to Jason Todd in the Batcave. The silence is eerie as we get one small “spsh” sound as Jason steps through the blood trail of Bruce, Tim and Dick. Unfortunately, this seems to take place shortly after the events of DCeased #2 when an infected Dick and Tim attack and infect Batman, leaving Alfred to kill them all. Jason, like most readers, is shocked because he thought Bruce would have found a way to survive and then he’s met by Ace the Bathound. After letting Ace see that he’s not infected, Jason proceeds to make graves for his brothers and father before speeding off in the Batmobile to find the rest of his family with Ace.

These scenes are powerful as Jason, normally the black sheep of the family, has to deal with the fact that he’s one of few left. Why wasn’t Bruce prepared? Why was he the one left and not Dick or Tim? Damian’s still alive in Metropolis, but effectively, Jason is all alone. Mostert and I believe Neil Edwards show Jason’s love for his family as he carves out wooden headstones and buries them in the cave. Without a word of dialogue, this speaks volumes about Jason’s love for his family.

Elsewhere in Gotham, Ravager, Rose Wilson with a missing eye, unlike her main continuity counterpart, is curled up in her apartment in fear. The zombies are pounding on her door when Slade radios in and tells her it’s time to escape. Rose has the ability to see into the future in short bursts and sees that everytime she goes for the door, Zombies come through and kill her. Deathstroke, however, has a plan. As a side note, it’s great to see Rose in gear similar to what she wore in Geoff Johns’ “Teen Titans” while also complementing Deathstroke’s current armor.

Unfortunately for Deathstroke, as he keeps his eyes to the sky, he sees the terror that is an infected Man-Bat flying at him with a terrifying SCReeeee as he crashes through the window and smashes the plane on the roof Rose runs to her dad and, believing him to be infected, plunges her sword through his chest and he screams “Ow.” This scene is pure comedy made even better by the dramatic rain and fire in the background. Soon after, Mirror Master, Evan McCulloch, shows up offering them help.

I don’t know what the reason is for using the Scottish version of the character, but it doesn’t really matter as the representation of the Mirror Dimension is still cool as hell. While wearing special glasses that block signals, they walk through the dimension and Mostert draws an epic depiction of it with all of the violence, gore and death through the many mirrors while the characters look miniscule compared to the vastness of it all. The Mirror Dimension has always been terrifying and McCulloch could do a lot to solve the problem, but it makes sense that he doesn’t. Cause it’s terrifying.

After many pages, we arrive at the rest of the stars (fodder) of the series in Vandal Savage, Solomon Grundy, The Creeper, Cheetah, Lady Shiva, Bane, Deadshot and Captain Cold. I do have a bit of a continuity issue as Cold was shown to have been one of the Infected during the events of “A Good Place to Die,” but alternatively this series could explain how he got there or, much like that story, it’s off base with what’s happening in the main pages. But some of these additions are pretty interesting to say the very least.

Savage is near immortal, but has been shown to have been killed before. There’s a high chance that using Deathstroke, he’ll find a way to cure and rule over the people of the Earth after the heroes leave. Grundy is already dead, so can he get infected? The Creeper is much like Deathstroke in that he can heal from anything, so it makes sense that he’s managed to survive. Cheetah is strong and fast, but I don’t rate her chances high and the rest, while immensely skilled, are still just human. This is a ragtag group, but they’re not averse to getting the job done by any means.

The rest of the issue focuses on Jason Todd and his fight to rescue the remaining members of the Batfamily. Mostert, Lokus and John Livesay give readers an awesome assault on the Gotham PD with Cassandra Cain as Black Bat, James Gordon and Harvey Bullock fighting back against the zombies. Cass awesomely kicks and knees zombies in the background while Harvey and Jim shoot them. I LOVED Cass as Batgirl/Black Bat and it was awesome to see the return of the iconic costume and a character that I like so much.

Of course, Temofonte thrills with the lettering here again. She sells the panic in both Jim and Bullock as they fight off the horde as well as the frankness of Bullock as he has to break it to Jim that Blck Bat is the only one coming. The static-y bubbles that she uses on Bullock when he gets infected is also amazing and saddening, but gets even worse when Cass has to “CRCK” his neck to kill him. Soon after, Jason plows through the GCPD in the Batmobile with a “CRNNNCH” that shrinks around the vehicle.

Jason rescues Cass and Jim after shooting the remaining zombies in the head and plans to get the hell out of dodge. Jim, still holding out on the idea of hope, tells Jason that Barbara is still out there somewhere, but Jason, knowing that it’s no longer the time to keep secrets, reveals his and Cass’ identities and shows Jim that Barb is dead. He then takes the haggard detective to her last known location and Mostert and Lokus sell the utter despair of the scene.

Infected versions of Barb, Stephanie Brown, Batwoman and Catwoman were killed by Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn in Issue #3 of DCeased (if I remember right). This scene of James finding his daughter is depressingly grey and his facial expressions show us just how painful this is for him. He’s lost just about everything and cries in his grief. Jason, however, finds the dead body of the Joker and ties him to the front of the Batmobile before they all make their escape to Bludhaven.

This first issue of a three part miniseries already has me as excited as the original story did. I love each of the characters being used, the callbacks to past history and the way that everyone is being written. Each of these violent characters sees that there’s no need to hold back anymore as the regular rules are tossed out of the window. Everyone now has different amounts of pain and grief to deal with while others have different hopes of power or a cure. Ultimately, I don’t think things will end ultra well given the events of the main series, but I have no doubts that this will stand on its own.

Tom Taylor continues to be excellent when writing the despair and tragedies of DCeased and lifting up lesser characters, like The Creeper. His scripting and dialogue are a joy to read and I really feel like he’s got a grasp on everyone. Karl Mostert brings their all to this book with awesome panels and scenes that make readers want to wince, but look again to see the utter brutality of what they’re witnessing. His art is stellar. The various inkers definitely bring it to life alongside Lokus’ vibrant colors and Temofonte’s amazing letters.

I’m already gleefully anticipating the next issue and it more than justifies the $5.99 price, high recommend!

Also, y'know, support me on Patreon: patreon.com/TyTalksComics

#dceased #dceased unkillables #jason todd #cassandra cain #james gordon #deathstroke #rose wilson #tom taylor #karl mostert #rex lokus #saida temofonte #dc comics #comic books #comics #zombies

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silverlightqueen · 5 years

Text

Ruin My Life

Based on Ruin My Life by Zara Larsson

RML masterlist

(fratboy!Jimin bc I’m a slut for douchey Jimin🤷🏽‍♀️) - smut, flirty banter, angst and fluff to come

Word Count - 8.7k+

Summary - After an eventful afternoon in the library and an unexpected reunion, you end up sending a text that you might regret...

Warnings - v v smutty!!! dom!Jimin, daddy kink, oral, dirty talking, intercourse, spanking, thigh riding, a lil bit of everything ig

a/n: so this went in a very different direction than I intended it to when I started writing it lol, but I actually like the plot twist so here ya go. also, this is definitely going to be a series and hopefully I’ll be uploading part 2 very soon bc I've already started on it lmao. Please tell me what y’all think, I’d love to get some feedback💕

Edit: Part 2 is out now, link in my masterlist💕

I love university. Everything about it. My course is super interesting and there’s never a moment when I think I’d rather be doing a different course. My lecturers are super cool and understanding, all of them young, so they know what we’re going through, and considerate. My friends and roommate are all amazing people and they’ll never give me a chance to be sad or bored, always on hand to cheer me up and take me out. The parties are always so much fun and I’m lucky enough to have never had a bad experience with a drunk and horny boy, or a group of bitchy girls. So yes, unlike some others around here, I love university with my whole heart and soul. I’m one of those annoying people who shows up to early morning lectures with a coordinated and pristine outfit, a full face of makeup and perfect hair, my laptop and matching stationery ready, as well as a Starbucks and breakfast. I wake up happy in the mornings and go to sleep happy at night. And this isn’t one of those stories where I’m going to rattle on about how much I love university and then say that there’s one exception to the rule. No, definitely not. This is a slightly different story. Because I was pondering how much I love university whilst sat at a desk in the library, book in hand, both headphones in, just as something happened which would cause a chain of events which would in turn change my view on my university for the rest of my life. Maybe even ruin my life as it is, for better and for worse.

Someone leans against the desk beside me and pulls out one headphone, Drake being cut off mid-rap, and I look up, expecting it to be my roommate, Mija, or one of my other friends, but instead, it’s a surprise, and not exactly a nice one. ‘Hello, darling,’ Kim Taehyung says, looking down at me with a small smirk. He’s dressed in the school’s football kit, shorts to his knees, and a loose t-shirt, and he holds his varsity jacket over his shoulder. I sigh, knowing that this probably won’t end well. ‘My name isn’t darling,’ I say quietly, but he reacts to the words like I shouted them in his face, flinching slightly. ‘Well, obviously, y/n,’ he chuckles, saying it with emphasis as a way to prove that he knows my name, and I raise an eyebrow. ‘Can I help you, Taehyung?’ I ask, putting my book down and leaning back in my seat, knowing he isn’t going to leave easily. ‘Yes, actually, babe. I wanted to ask something of you,’ he says, his jawline clenched once the words leave his mouth, and I roll my eyes. ‘Ask it then, and I’ll see if it’s worth my time,’ I say, and his lips quirk up in amusement.

Now, I feel like I should explain something. I’m not a bitch, okay? I’m super nice. I’m one of those girls that gets along with everyone, little kids, old people and everyone in between. I could get along with a brick wall if I had to. I’m sociable, kind and easy to talk to. But frat boys… frat boys are the one exception. I’m lucky enough to not have to see them most of the time, my schedule conflicting with theirs, and we don’t really run in the same social circles. But Taehyung and his friends, I’d been unfortunate enough to encounter them a few times more than I would ever want to. Not direct encounters, though. Through my friends, and their heartbreaks, one-night stands, rejections and short relationships with the boys. I’d had to wipe away their tears, console them and spend nights chatting shit about the boys more times that I can count. It had become tiring to say the least. So, please, forgive me for the way I’m speaking to Taehyung, because he deserves it.

‘Let me take you out?’ he asks, and my lips curl up into a grin. ‘Ah, you and your stupid friends are really not as funny as you seem to think you are. Is this a bet, or a dare? Or are you getting something for it? Money, maybe? If you are, I’ll say yes, and I get half,’ I say, and he looks surprised, trying to keep up with my words. ‘Wait, what? This isn’t a dare, and it’s not for money,’ he says, and I raise an eyebrow. ‘So, it’s a bet then?’ I ask, and he shakes his head hastily. ‘Can’t a guy ask a girl out for the sake of it?’ he asks, tilting his head in a way he must think is endearing. It is, to be honest, but I wouldn’t admit it to him in a million years; he already knows how intimidatingly handsome he is. ‘What makes you want to ask me out? What’s special about me?’ I challenge. ‘Of course you’re special, baby,’ he says, mistaking me trying to catch him out as insecurity. The way the words roll of his tongue with such ease tell me he’s said them many times before, and it makes me even more annoyed. ‘I know I’m special, dumbass, way too special to be dealing with this right now. I wanna know what you think is so special about me to ask me out,’ I explain exasperatedly. ‘You’re, like, clever, and stuff. And you’re pretty,’ he says with a grin, thinking he’s done well. ‘I’m clever, pretty, and stuff?’ I ask deadpan, and he nods proudly. ‘Wow, thanks!’ I say sarcastically, and then he seems to clock that I’m not too impressed with his observations. ‘To save myself from any more of the bullshit that has been nonstop exiting your mouth for the past minute, I’m going to ask you to leave now,’ I say, and I hear choked laughter from behind me. I don’t bother to turn and look, knowing that it’s probably his stupid friends, and continue staring at Taehyung, waiting for him to leave. ‘I’ll see you around, y/n,’ he grins, strutting away. I roll my eyes, putting my headphone back in and getting back to work, incorrect in thinking that that was the end of it. Only a few minutes later, and I have another visitor.

‘I guess my desk is the place to be this afternoon, huh?’ I ask as I pull out a headphone, looking up to see Hoseok smirking down at me, dressed in the same kit as Tae, his varsity jacket on instead. ‘It’s not because of the desk, though,’ he says, and I nearly laugh out loud. ‘Can I help you, Hobi? Because I have loads of work to do,’ I sigh tiredly. ‘Fuck the work, do me instead,’ he says with a grin, and I choke. ‘Wow, you’re… straightforward, I’ll give you that. But you do know that no girl with more than one braincell would ever be flattered or turned on after being spoken to like that?’ I reply with a raised eyebrow. ‘And you’ve got more than one braincell, have you, y/n?’ he asks, a mischievous grin playing at his lips. ‘Yes, more than can be said for you and your friends. Now whatever stupid game it is that you guys are playing, give it up and leave me alone. I’m busy,’ I say in annoyance. ‘Too busy for me? Don’t hurt me, y/n,’ he says, his mouth constantly stretched into that stupidly handsome smile. ‘Even if I’m watching paint dry, I’m still too busy for you,’ I say, and he clutches his heart dramatically. ‘How can you hurt me this way, babe?’ he says, and I roll my eyes. ‘Leave, Hobi, I’m not dealing with your stupidity anymore,’ I say, putting my headphone back in, not waiting to see if he’s left or not. I’m lucky to be left in peace for a few minutes, until another of their stupid friends bothers me.

‘Oh, this had better be good,’ I say, putting my book down again, looking up to see Jungkook smiling his annoyingly cute bunny smile at me, his jacket tied around his small waist. ‘Trust me, baby, if it’s to do with me, it will be,’ he says confidently, my eyebrow quirking up. ‘Arrogance? Not the best way to seduce a girl,’ I say. ‘Who says I’m trying to seduce you?’ he asks, trying not to grin, and I laugh. ‘Don’t be silly, Jeon.’ ‘Who’s the arrogant one now?’ he says, and I give an impressed nod. ‘Touché. So, what have you come over here to ask me to do? Are you gonna beat around the bush like Tae and ask me out on a date, or are you gonna get straight to the point like Hobi and tell me to do you?’ I ask, and I can see him try not to laugh. ‘How about I take you out and then you do me? Or rather, I do you?’ he suggests, and I nod as I digest his words, trying not to let the way his words affect me show. ‘What a… tempting offer. But no, thank you, I have much more important things to do,’ I say, and he pouts at me. ‘More important than me? I didn’t think it was possible,’ he says ponderingly, and I hold back a laugh. ‘God, you’re annoying. You must be insane if you think you have any importance in my life,’ I say, and he hisses, pretending to be hurt. ‘Ouch. Come on, noona, you know you find me attractive,’ he says, and I laugh aloud. ‘What’s the game? Is it a bet to see who can get me on a date?’ I ask, and he raises an eyebrow. ‘You’re clever,’ he says, revealing it straight away. ‘I am, but even someone with your IQ could figure that out after having three morons from the same friendship group come up to you in the space of twenty minutes,’ I say. ‘I’ll have you know my IQ is higher than average. 128, to be precise,’ he says, and I raise an eyebrow at his IQ being mere points off mine. ’28? Sounds about right,’ I say, and he laughs a genuine laugh. ‘You’re a funny girl, y/n. I’m actually genuinely asking you out now, not because of the dare,’ he says, and I grin, amused. ‘Maybe some other time, Kook, when I’m not so busy,’ I say, taking pity on the boy before scrawling down my number on a piece of paper. ‘Don’t hit me up if you want your dick sucked, that’s not what this is for. Send me your name so I have your number, and I’ll let you know when I’m free if I don’t change my mind,’ I say, and he grins victoriously as he takes it from me, the boys behind causing a ruckus. ‘Can I have a kiss for the road?’ he asks, a cheeky smile on his annoyingly cute face, and I laugh. ‘Run along, Jeon,’ I say, and he does so, leaving me laughing to myself.

Only a few minutes later, someone takes a seat opposite me, and I supress a sigh. ‘I’m not gonna fuck around like those kids, I’m gonna get straight to it. Let me take you out,’ Seokjin says once I’ve taken out a headphone, and I raise an eyebrow at his straightforward statement. ‘Well, what a way to woo a girl, Jin. God knows how you’ve managed to get so many girls into your bed,’ I say, and he gives me a smile, staggeringly handsome with his dark hair hanging over onto his forehead, his kit the same as the other boys. ‘I get into theirs, they don’t get into mine. Imagine the germs. I’d let you, though, babe,’ he smiles, and my heart jumps. ‘Thank you, I’m flattered, but I’d rather not step foot anywhere other than the downstairs of your frat house for as long as I live,’ I say, and he laughs his endearingly loud laugh, sounding distinctly like a windshield wiper. ‘I don’t mind coming to yours,’ he offers. ‘So you took that obvious rejection as an offer to come to my apartment? God, you frat boys really are dense, huh?’ I say, and he raises an eyebrow. ‘So you don’t want me?’ he asks. ‘No, Seokjin, I don’t.’ ‘You gave your number to Jungkook,’ he points out, and I raise an eyebrow. ‘He wore me down. And he’s cute, I guess,’ I admit, and Jin gives me a sceptical look. ‘So I’m not cute?’ ‘No, you aren’t cute, and you know that that’s not an appropriate word to describe you at all,’ I say, the subliminal message obvious to him. ‘So you find me attractive, then?’ he asks. ‘So is this about getting validation or about asking me out? Because it’s sure seeming like the former,’ I say. ‘I don’t need validation, babe, I know I’m handsome. I just want to know how you feel about me,’ he says, tilting his head to the side inquisitively. ‘I think you’re handsome, but I don’t have any kind of emotional or physical attraction to you in the slightest, Jin. My apologies but go find a girl who will fawn over you like you want her to,’ I say, and he laughs. ‘Fair enough, I gave it a try, I guess,’ he says, getting up. ‘And it was a good one at that,’ I say, taking pity on him, and putting a sympathetic hand on his forearm, and the boys start to pipe up behind me. ‘See you later, Y/N,’ he says, and I smile at him.

Next, I have someone filling the seat beside me, and I roll my eyes, knowing this stupid roleplay is unavoidable. ‘Hey, y/n,’ I hear once I’ve removed my headphone, and the voice brings a smile to my face. Perhaps the only one I actually like out of them all. ‘Hey, Joon,’ I say, with a wide smile, hearing the boys whispering once more. ‘I… I’m sorry, this is so dumb,’ he says with a shake of his head, and I laugh. ‘It’s okay. I guess it’s kind of brought me some entertainment for this afternoon,’ I say. ‘It was a stupid bet to see if any of us would actually be able to get you to agree to going out with us,’ he says. ‘Where did it come from though? Why did it even come up into conversation?’ I ask, curious, the handsome man rolling his eyes. ‘We were supposed to have a meeting with the Dean of the school in here, something about the frat, but she had to reschedule, and we ended up staying in here because we had nothing else to do. Then Tae spotted you, and asked when you got so hot, and I said you’ve always been hot, because you have, and then one thing led to another, and Tae bet he could get you to go out with him, so all the rest of us bet too, because we’re mindlessly competitive morons,’ he explains, and I crack up at his last few words. ‘Well,’ I say in a low voice, smiling gently as I lean closer to him and place a hand onto his chest for effect, ‘you can go back and tell them that I said I’d definitely go out with you, and I said I’d take you home too, because we really are due a catch-up, and we haven’t binged a series since freshman year.’ He grins at my physical deception to the boys, my words about reconnecting as friends conflicting greatly with my actions, and brushes a piece of hair behind my ear. ‘I’ll text you soon,’ he says, getting up, and I smile at him. ‘Please do,’ I say, the boys reacting far too loudly for the library.

And then I get another visitor ten minutes later. ‘I’m gonna cut to the chase. What’s it gonna take for you to give me your number just so I can shut the boys up?’ Yoongi asks me, and I let out a laugh. ‘You need to convince me,’ I reply as he takes the seat beside me. ‘What did Namjoon and Jungkook do? Did they bribe you?’ he asks, his big brown eyes dancing as he grins mischievously. ‘No, neither of them bribed me. They used their natural charm,’ I say, and he grimaces. ‘I don’t have any of that so would you take a bribe?’ he asks, and I laugh again. ‘You are charming, and witty,’ I say, and he raises his eyebrows. ‘Why does it sound like you’re trying to get my number?’ he asks, and again, he has me laughing, effortlessly funny. ‘Aw, Yoongi, you’re funny. But no, I don’t take bribes,’ I say, and he fake scowls. ‘Not money? Or food?’ he asks, and I contemplate this for a moment. ‘Yeah, probably,’ I say, and he grins the most adorable gummy smile I’ve seen in my life. ‘Okay, I’ll buy you takeout of your choice on any given night. Just text me and I’ll order it to your apartment,’ he says, and I consider his offer. ‘I’ll one-up you; I’m gonna have Joon over soon for a day of binge-watching Netflix. You can come too as long as you bring snacks and then order dinner,’ I bargain, and he nods, ‘Deal.’ ‘Perfect. Let me put my number in your phone and then text me later,’ I say, and he hands me his phone with a smug look at the boys. They let out outraged noises as I put my number in his phone, trying not to laugh as I see the librarian stomping over in their direction. ‘Thanks, y/n, you’re a real one,’ he says, and I grin, shaking my head as he walks away. But the last visitor I get, around twenty minutes later, is definitely the most… unwelcome.

‘Hey, princess. Long time, no see,’ he says after plucking out a headphone, and his voice sends a chill through me. Okay, so maybe I lied when I said I hadn’t directly encountered any of them. One of them may or may not be an ex-fuck buddy (I hate that phrase but it’s the best way to describe it, because we definitely weren’t friends with benefits). It’d been a low point in my university life, when I’d broken up with a long-term boyfriend and wanted to go crazy for a little, and I guess that’s what I ended up doing. Or rather, who I ended up doing. No one other than my roommate knows about our fling, as far as I’m aware, and it’d ended after a few months. We haven’t spoken since, and every time I’ve seen him in real life, I’ve practically run in the other direction to avoid him. It’s not that we ended on bad terms; it’s just… awkward. And now, here he is. Sat on the desk beside me, looking as handsome as ever in his football kit, his thick thighs and strong arms straining against the material, his varsity jacket tied low on his hips. He runs a hand through his newly dyed dirty blond locks, smirking as he watches my eyes travel over his body.

‘Hey, Jimin,’ I reply, not really knowing what else to say. ‘That’s not what you used to call me,’ he says with a smirk, looking down at me with sparkling eyes. ‘It’s what I called you when we were around other people,’ I point out, and he grins widely, his pearly whites out on display. ‘How have you been, princess? I’ve missed you,’ he pouts, and I roll my eyes, trying to act like his nickname for me doesn’t affect me in the slightest. ‘I really doubt that, Jimin. Did you even have enough time in your… busy schedule to miss me?’ I ask with a raised eyebrow, his grin becoming even wider. ‘Now, babe, don’t get jealous. You know that when I was with you, I was with only you, no one else. So, don’t act like the scorned woman,’ he reprimands me, running a hand through his hair again, and I roll my eyes once more. ‘What a privilege,’ I say sarcastically, and he shakes his head at me. ‘Look how you treat me. After everything we went through together,’ he says. ‘The only thing we went through together was a jumbo pack of condoms,’ I say, and he bursts out laughing. ‘I forgot how funny you are, babe,’ he says, and I try not to smile at seeing him look so happy. ‘Listen, don’t be mad at me for moving on. As much as I hate to bring it up, you’re the one that ended things with me, though only God knows why. We were good together, right?’ he asks, and I nod, knowing he’s right; we were. ‘So why did you end it?’ he asks, and I sigh. ‘Do you really wanna know, Jimin?’ I ask, and he nods, watching me interestedly. ‘Because I started to catch feelings for you,’ I admit, watching his face for any kind of reaction, but he doesn’t show any sign of emotion, his face not changing in the slightest. ‘And?’ he asks after a few seconds, hand sweeping through his hair again. ‘Two reasons. One, I’d just gotten out of a relationship, and wasn’t looking to get into another one. Two, you weren’t, and still aren’t, the type of guy to even want a relationship, so there was no point continuing what we had, because I would’ve fallen for you more and more, and it wouldn’t have gone anywhere,’ I say, and he raises an eyebrow. ‘Because you know me so well?’ he asks, and I nod with a small smile. ‘I knew you better than you thought I did,’ I say, and he nods, digesting my words.

‘Well, what do you say we give us a go again, Y/N?’ he asks seriously, and I nearly choke. ‘What, like… do what we used to do?’ I ask, and he nods with a small smile, running a hand through his hair. God, it’s so sexy when he does that. ‘Obviously. Not a relationship, you said it yourself, you know I’m not that guy. Unless you’re gonna go catching feelings again,’ he says, and I scoff. ‘Don’t flatter yourself. I’ve matured. Just as much as you’ve become more of a douche,’ I say, and he holds his chest in mock pain. ‘Ouch, princess, you really know how to hurt me, huh?’ he jokes, and I stick my tongue out at him. ‘Thanks for trying to pimp yourself out to me, Jimin, but no, thank you. I’ve passed that stage in my life,’ I say, putting on a snooty voice, and he pulls a face at me, scrunching up his nose adorably. ‘Come on, princess, for old times’ sake. Just one more time. Then I’ll leave you alone,’ he says, and I shake my head. ‘Can’t you go ask some naïve freshman who doesn’t know you well and will think she’s ‘oh-so special’?’ I say, and he laughs. ‘Princess, you were the naïve freshman at one point, remember?’ he says. ‘We were sophomores,’ I point out. ‘Regardless. Nothing like a one-last-time fuck, huh?’ he says, his casual way with words igniting something long forgotten inside me.

‘Go ask someone else, Jimin,’ I say, looking away from him, knowing if he doesn’t leave soon, I won’t be able to resist him much longer. ‘Don’t you understand, y/n? I’m asking you because I want it to be you. I don’t just want any old sex, I want good sex, and, as much as this is majorly wounding my pride to admit this to you, you are the best I’ve had,’ he says, his tone honest and shameless, and my eyes widen. ‘Seriously? I’m the best? Out of like the other 200 girls you’ve fucked?’ ‘Hey! Don’t downplay me, more like 300,’ he jokes, and I try to hold back a laugh. ‘You’re probably a walking STD,’ I say with a disgusted shake of my head, and he lets out a small laugh. ‘Fine, y/n, but you have my number still, right? You know where I am if you need me,’ he says, getting up. But he hesitates before leaving. ‘I really did mean it when I said I missed you, princess,’ he says, our eyes locked together as he runs a hand through his soft locks, and I look away, embarrassed. He leaves then, and all I can think is, I missed you too.

And it is that thought, resounding in my mind all afternoon, for the rest of my stay in the library, on my way home, during movie night with my roommate, that leads me to do what I nearly do. My fingers ghosting over the screen of my phone, hovering over the send button, I look up at the screen briefly. ‘I can’t believe the main character died already. Her death was so sad,’ my roommate, Mija, says. ‘I know,’ I reply half-heartedly, looking back at my phone. ‘You bitch! You really haven’t paid attention at all! The main character hasn’t died! And he’s a guy!’ she shouts, hitting me repeatedly with a pillow. ‘Ow, Mija! I’m sorry, I’m sorry! Just stop! Mija!’ I shriek, the other girl finally giving up. ‘Right, explain. Why have you been staring at your phone for the past hour?’ she asks. I give in instantly, telling her of the events of the library, specifically my conversation with Jimin, and she gives me the perfect reactions, gasping and laughing in all the right places. She really is the best person to tell stories to. Once I’m done, she stares at me. ‘What are you waiting for then?’ she asks, and I stare stupidly at her, confused. ‘What?’ ‘Message him, you idiot!’ ‘Oh! Yeah, but what if I catch feelings again? He basically said today that he is not up for a relationship,’ I say. ‘So, fuck him once last time, and be done with it,’ she says. ‘You think?’ I say. ‘I know! He told you you’re the best sex he’s ever had, you dumb bitch! For Park Jimin to say that, it must’ve been fucking good, so don’t let that opportunity go to waste,’ she says. ‘Okay, okay, stop cussing me out!’ I say in mock hurt, and she rolls her eyes. ‘Text him, you moron. I’m gonna go see our neighbours, and you’d better put on that brand-new Agent Provocateur set we bought together,’ she says threateningly, jumping up from the sofa and leaving in her pyjamas, phone and popcorn in hand, before I can even say anything. I grab my phone and send the text before I psych myself out. I quickly put my phone on speaker for once and then begin to clean up the living room. I get a text back around a minute later and I practically pounce at my phone. The text I see simultaneously makes me roll my eyes and smile, before I lock my phone and rush around tidying. Then I quickly slip out of my comfies and into a black lingerie set; bra, pants, suspenders, lace, sheer, straps, the whole shebang. I quickly tidy my room too, and then take a seat on the couch again, acting all calm and collected, flicking through the music channels on the TV impatiently.

Only sixteen minutes after I sent the text, I hear a knock at the door and wait until he knocks again before getting up to answer the door. I pull it open slightly, looking through the small gap, his dark eyes meeting mine. He looks positively delectable, dressed in a pair of light blue distressed jeans with rips that reveal strong thighs, and a white t-shirt with the word ‘Lovers’ printed across the front in black writing, a fitted black leather jacket over the top. A silver earring dangles from his left ear, a silver hoop in the other, and his hair is parted just slightly off-centre, a small strip of his forehead exposed. ‘I hate it when you leave me waiting. I nearly ran a guy over driving here, and this is what I get in return?’ he growls, only half-hearted annoyance behind the words, and I pull the door completely open, letting him in. ‘Wow,’ he says, stopping in his tracks in the doorway, his eyes raking over my body shamelessly, ‘all this for me, princess?’ I smile coyly, shy under his burning gaze, and brush a lock of hair behind my ear. ‘All for you, Jimin,’ I say, and he takes a step into the room, throwing the door closed with a thud.

He practically throws himself at me, his hands gripping at my waist as his lips find my neck. ‘Now, now, princess, that’s not what you call me when we’re alone, is it?’ he murmurs against my skin, the feel of him touching me again nearly making me melt in his arms. ‘No, daddy,’ I breathe out, and he exhales shakily, his lips pulling and biting at the tender skin below my jaw. ‘Fuck, it’s been so long,’ he whispers, his hands snaking around my thighs, pulling me upwards. I get the hint, jumping up and wrapping my legs around his waist, my actions a result of muscle memory, and he walks towards my bedroom, his lips still working on my neck. He kicks the door open, the loud noise making me jump, and he lets out a gentle laugh at my reaction, before he virtually throws me down onto the bed. He climbs over me, his toned body hovering over my smaller frame, and he stares down at me. ‘God, I’ve missed you,’ he whispers before pressing his lips to mine, our bodies fitting together perfectly.

He parts his lips and I follow suit, his tongue easily sliding into my mouth to meet mine, and the way our mouths work together in perfect harmony brings memories of long nights past rushing back. The hand that isn’t holding him up grazes up and down my side as my hands grip his back, feeling the soft leather against my skin. I tangle my fingers into his soft hair, the locks sliding between them like silk, and pull on it, feeling him groan into my mouth. Our kiss becomes more heated and passionate, all dancing tongues and clashing teeth. The taste of mint and something distinctly Jimin has me wanting more. I didn’t realise how much I missed the feeling of him, and I relish every moment that his hand digs into my waist and his mouth works against mine. I pull his plump lower lip between my teeth before running my tongue over it, and he groans again, the sound heavenly. He rolls us over, so I lay atop him, and both of his hands furiously explore my body, tracing the curves of my back, waist and hips, and gripping onto my ass tightly. My hands rest on either side of his face, our lips still attached, my hair falling around us like a curtain. ‘Princess,’ he breathes out against my lips, and I pull away by a millimetre, our noses touching, the tiniest distance between our lips. ‘As much as I’m enjoying catching up, I’m getting impatient,’ Jimin says, grinding up against me, the hardening bulge in his tight jeans brushing against my stomach, and I let out a tiny whimper. ‘You like the feel of that, princess? I’m so hard, just for you,’ he whispers against my ear, grinding up against me again. I try to palm him through his jeans, and he slaps my hand away instantly, a dark glint appearing in his eyes.

‘Off,’ he instructs, and I climb off him, watching as he sits up, moving to the edge of the bed, his feet planted firmly on the floor. He pats his lap and I already know what’s coming. ‘Why, daddy? Haven’t I been a good girl?’ I ask, pouting at him with big eyes, and he lets out a harsh laugh, repeating the action again. I reluctantly bend over his lap, my ass up in the air, as he chuckles. ‘Good girl? You think you’ve been a good girl?’ he asks, and I nod. His hand lands on my ass without any warning, the slap hard and stinging, and I supress the yelp that nearly leaves my mouth, knowing it’ll only get me more. ‘That is for not replying to any of my texts or calls,’ he spits out before his hand lands another slap on my ass, even harder this time. ‘That is for avoiding me around campus and at parties.’ Another slap, painfully harsh, bringing tears to my eyes, slick beginning to pool in my black lace pants. ‘That is for flirting with all my friends at said parties, where you knew I could see you.’ Another slap, harsher again, causing me to lurch forward on his lap. ‘That is for giving Jungkook, Namjoon and Yoongi your number.’ ‘Namjoon already had my number!’ I say indignantly, and he slaps my ass harder than any of the previous slaps, causing the tears to spill over, my cheeks stinging and red. I’ll probably have bruises the shape of his hand tomorrow. ‘You never know when to keep your mouth shut, princess,’ he says, his hand landing against my ass again, a loud clap resounding against the room, and I can feel heat rushing to my core. ‘And that one is for how you’ve gotten even sexier over the past two years,’ he says before pulling me up off his lap and pushing me back down onto the bed.

He hovers over me again, pressing his lips against where the tears spilled over onto my face. ‘You are a good girl for me, princess. You always take your punishments so well. I just missed leaving bruises on this perfect ass,’ he murmurs against my face, his kind words making my heart warm. ‘Thank you, daddy,’ I whisper in reply, feeling him tense against me. ‘Such a good girl. My princess deserves a reward, right? You deserve a reward, don’t you, baby girl?’ he asks, and I nod, my bottom lip between my teeth. He ducks his head suddenly, his lips appearing at my jaw, slowly travelling down my neck to my collarbones, leaving blooming bruises in his wake, wanting to mark me as his. When he reaches the black lace of my bra, he lets out a deep breath. ‘You look so sexy in this,’ he says, looking up at me through his dirty blond locks. ‘Don’t rip it off, please, daddy, it was expensive,’ I say gently, and he chuckles. ‘I’ll buy you a new one, princess,’ he says, and I pout at him, not wanting it to go to waste after only wearing it once. ‘Fine,’ he huffs in mock annoyance, his hands snaking under my torso to unclip the clasp of my bra expertly. He pulls it off me, throwing it over his shoulder, and I shiver at the cold air hitting my newly exposed breasts, my nipples already hardening. Jimin exhales deeply, his breath hitting my chest, and I whimper at the feeling, watching him grin before ducking his head to wrap his lips around one nipple. His hand tugs and toys with the other nipple whilst his mouth pulls and sucks on the first, the sensations making me whine. I wrap my hands into his hair as he moves his mouth the other nipple, doing the same, making me numb. He moves further down my body, his lips pressing kisses down my stomach until he reaches the hem of my pants. With a roll of his eyes, he pulls my pants swiftly down my legs rather than ripping them off me like he used to, discarding them on the floor too, leaving me completely naked beneath him. ‘So fucking beautiful,’ he whispers, spreading my legs slowly.

‘God, I forgot how wet you get. Has anyone else managed to get you this wet, princess?’ he asks, and the question embarrasses me. The truth is that no one has. No one has ever pleased me the way Jimin used to. He grew to know my body well, knowing exactly what got me going and what I liked. It’s slightly humiliating how quickly Jimin can get me to my climax. ‘I asked you a question, princess. Has anyone else gotten you this wet?’ he asks, teeth gritted, fingers pressing into my waist. Jimin is all about validation, I’ve learned to realise. Praising him makes him feel fantastic, and when he feels fantastic, he makes me feel fantastic. ‘No, daddy, only you,’ I reply, a grin splitting his face before he ducks between my legs. He blows hot air out over my core, and I let out a small whimper. ‘Please, daddy,’ I say, unable to stop the words slipping out of my mouth, and ready myself for a reprimanding. ‘So needy, princess,’ he chuckles, surprising me by fulfilling my wishes, licking a stripe across my slit. ‘Tastes so good, princess,’ he praises as I let out a small moan, my feet curling up against the soft sheets. He licks at my core slowly, tongue lapping up my slit languorously, dipping his muscle in between my folds every few seconds, the process sending mind-numbing shocks through me. Without warning, he attaches his lips to my clit, sucking and tugging on the bundle of nerves, and I throw my head back onto the pillow, my back arching up. ‘Stay still, princess,’ he warns me, the vibration of his words against my heat having me shivering as one arm comes up to hold my hips down against the bed. His other hand comes up to between my legs and he slowly pushes one finger into my core, working his way in. ‘So tight, baby girl, am I not turning you on enough?’ he asks, and I know this question’s rhetorical, moaning out as he plunges another finger in, trying to open me up a little more. ‘I’m not gonna get my cock in at this rate, princess,’ he says, still with his lips wrapped around my clit, his two fingers slowly pumping in and out of me.

He gradually increases his pace, adding another finger in after a few moments, his mouth still working wonders at my clit. After a while, I can feel my orgasm building up, the moans falling more frequently from my mouth, Jimin only increasing his pace more and more, until his fingers pump in and out furiously fast, his tongue licking up and down my slit before pulling on my clit with his lips. My hands, threaded into his soft locks, pull him closer and closer to my core, and I can feel myself fast approaching the edge. He curls his fingers inside me, hitting that a particular spot, and I let out a loud whine. ‘Shit, Jimin, right there,’ I moan, and he stops his movements. I look down at him, already feeling my orgasm diminishing, and he stares back harshly. ‘What did you call me, princess?’ he asks sternly, and I pout. ‘Sorry, daddy, I forgot. It just felt so good,’ I reply, and a tender smile slips onto his face. ‘It’s okay, baby girl, you can say my name if you want,’ he allows before he goes back to his previous ministrations, and I feel myself tumbling towards the edge. ‘Come on, princess, you’re so close,’ he whispers, and I finally reach my orgasm when he curls his fingers and pulls on my clit at the exact same moment. ‘Fuck, Jimin!’ I cry out, back arching off the bed as my release washes over me.

Once I’ve come down from my high, Jimin licks up my release before he climbs off me, standing up beside the bed. He holds out his fingers to me, and I open my mouth, tasting myself on his digits, licking them clean. He slips off his socks and shoes as I take deep breaths, recovering, and he watches me fondly. Shakily, I push myself up, kneeling at the edge of the bed to help him undress. He shrugs off his jacket and then pulls his t-shirt over his head, throwing it onto the floor as I unbutton his jeans, tugging them down his legs, leaving him in a pair of plain black boxers, his bulge straining against the material. He watches as I run my hands over his chest, the muscles more prominent than they used to be, his skin more tanned now too. I bring my lips up to his collarbone, kissing and sucking to leave a mark of my own, threading my hands into the hair at the nape of his neck. ‘Princess, as much as I’m enjoying this, I really need you,’ he says breathlessly, obviously trying not to let out any noises, and I pull away from his skin. ‘Okay, daddy,’ I reply, pulling his boxers down just enough to let his hard length spring up against his stomach. He’s longer than I remember, thicker too, and his head is painfully swollen, the tip leaking precum. My mouth waters at the sight. I press a kiss to his tip, my tongue sliding out between my lips to lick up his precum, and he lets out an audible breath. I move back, spitting on my hands and running them up and down his length slowly, Jimin’s hands coming to gather up my hair and hold it back. I place my tongue at the base, licking up to his tip against the vein on the underside of his cock, feeling him tense as I do so. I take his head into my mouth, swirling my tongue around him, my hands rubbing him slowly. I look up at him through my lashes as I take him further into my mouth, feeling him hit the back of my throat, and his head falls back, a moan falling from his lips, the sound rushing straight to my core.

I build up my pace, steadily bobbing my head up and down, taking him as far in as I can, trying not to gag around him. ‘Fuck, princess, your mouth feels so good around my cock,’ he groans, saliva dripping down my chin and my eyes watering, not to mention the pain from how hard he’s tugging on my hair, but hearing the moans from him makes it all worth it. Just as I manage to adjust to him in my mouth, nearly backing down my throat, he becomes impatient. He begins thrusting into my mouth, controlling my head movements with the hand he has fisted in my hair, and all I can do is grab onto the back of his thighs as he fucks my mouth. ‘Ah, you’re such a good girl, princess. You make daddy feel so good, y/n. Taking my cock so well,’ he groans, and I moan at his words, the vibrations only making him thrust faster. The tears stream down my face, saliva now dripping all the way down my neck and chest, and I begin rubbing at my clit, already wet again. His thrusts into my mouth become messier and I know he’s nearing his edge, the moans and groans of my name becoming more and more frequent. I feel his cock twitch inside my mouth, ready for the hot cum that hits the back of my throat. ‘Shit, y/n,’ he moans, his head thrown back as he continues thrusting into me, filling my mouth with his release. Once he’s done, he pulls out of my mouth, his cum mingling with my saliva.

He looks down at me, my hair a tangled mess, my eyes streaming, spit and cum dripping down my face, fingers rubbing at my clit. I look up at him, hair pasted to his forehead with perspiration, chest heaving, lips swollen and shining. I swallow down what’s in my mouth as he collects up the liquid from my face and neck, his fingers entering my mouth. I lick them clean of all release again, still rubbing at myself, and I moan around his fingers, watching his eyes darken. ‘Already turned on, princess? You only orgasmed a few minutes ago! You always have been a greedy girl,’ he scolds, moving my pillows out of the way and sitting at the top of the bed, resting his back against the headboard. He pulls me up towards him and I think he’s going to want me to ride him, so when I try to straddle him, he shakes his head with a chuckle. He lifts me up and puts me down on his leg, my legs straddling his thigh, and he holds onto my waist. ‘You want me to ride your thigh, daddy?’ I ask gently, looking at him through my lashes, and he nods with a low groan, leaning forward to press his lips to mine. I can taste myself in his mouth, and I know it’s the same for him, our tongues and teeth clashing as his hands trail down to my ass, giving it a light slap before gripping it tightly. He flexes his thigh beneath my heat and I moan into his mouth, feeling him grin against mine before pulling away.

I begin grinding down on his strong thigh, holding on to his shoulders for support, and his mouth comes to my breasts. He begins licking and sucking on my nipples again and the feeling distracts me. It’s only after a little while that we both realised that I’ve stopped, and he flexes his thigh beneath me. ‘Jimin!’ I cry out, my head falling back as a result of the pleasure coursing through my veins, and he smirks. ‘Move, princess,’ he commands, and I slowly begin rocking down onto his bare thigh, the friction against my heat making me moan, Jimin watching me intently. ‘God, I can feel how wet you are. Gushing all over my thigh, princess. Such a dirty girl,’ Jimin breathes out, eyes on me as I grind down on his thigh. He grabs onto my waist, increasing my pace, and I moan out his name, the motion sending my mind into overdrive. ‘Look at you, grinding on my thigh like that, so beautiful,’ he groans out, licking his lips. Jimin’s eyes don’t leave me for a second and I know exactly what’s running through his mind; smugness and desire at the sight of me getting myself off on his thigh. ‘Fuck, Jimin, you feel so good, daddy,’ I whimper, looking down at his thigh to see it coated with my slick. ‘Be a good girl, y/n, work hard on daddy’s thigh, and I might just fuck you senseless afterwards,’ he whispers, and I let out a moan at his dirty words, a reminder of how vast and vibrant his vocabulary used to be. His length is already hard again, precum leaking from the tip, and I swipe a finger to collect it all up. The action catches him off-guard and he moans out, his head falling back and his thigh flexing, causing me to moan out his name. ‘Come on, princess, I know you’re near,’ Jimin urges, flexing and bucking up his thigh, the moans falling from my lips in rapid succession as I hurtle towards my climax. My orgasm finally washes over me and my back arches before I fall forward, my head buried in his neck, his scent of an expensive aftershave that I recognise from two years ago, his fresh soap and, again, something that just belongs to him, and him only, just something Jimin, floods my senses. He continues rocking me on his thigh until I’ve come down from my high.

‘I don’t think there’s anything more beautiful than the sight of you cumming on my thigh, princess. I wish I could imprint it in my mind,’ Jimin breathes out, lifting me off his thigh and laying me down on the bed, hovering over me. ‘Do you still keep your condoms in the same place?’ he asks, eyes flitting over to my bedside drawers, and I smile up at him. ‘I’m on the pill,’ I say, and he raises an eyebrow. ‘You’ve always been on the pill. Doesn’t mean we shouldn’t take precautions. I don’t want you pregnant,’ he says, and I roll my eyes. ‘Yes, I keep them in the same place,’ I sigh, and he grins, reaching over to the drawer and pulling one out. He hands it to me, shutting the drawer as I rip it open, sliding the rubber onto his length gently, hearing him hiss at the feeling. ‘Ready?’ he asks as I wrap my legs around his waist, and I nod, ‘Yes, daddy.’ He plunges into me, filling me up to the hilt, and my head drops back on to the pillow, Jimin’s head falling onto my shoulder. ‘Fuck, you’re so tight, princess, why don’t you ever loosen up? I won’t be able to last long,’ he groans, and I know it’s a lie, knowing Jimin will keep going for as long as it takes me to cum before he does, his stamina something inhuman. ‘Can I move?’ he asks. ‘Please, daddy,’ I moan, and he pulls all the way out, leaving me empty, before he slams all the way back in, hips snapping up against mine. ‘Fuck, daddy, you feel so good,’ I moan out, and he groans, setting a steady pace, his hips rocking up to meet mine. ‘Deeper, Jimin, harder,’ I moan and, after a few more thrusts, he gets impatient and unhooks one of my legs from around his waist, moving it to stretch up over his shoulder instead, slamming into me harder. ‘Daddy, oh, god, yes!’ I scream as he goes deeper than I thought possible, leaving me feeling completely and utterly full. He slams into me again and again, hitting the spongy spot deep inside me repeatedly, having me screaming. ‘Yes, fuck, Jimin, feels so good!’ I cry out as he begins rubbing at my clit. ‘That’s it, princess, scream my name. Let everyone know who’s making you feel so good,’ he urges, groaning and grunting as he thrusts into me at a fast pace, his thumb rubbing furiously at my clit. ‘Jimin, fuck!’ I scream out, my orgasm washing over me without a single ounce of warning from my body, having me quivering and convulsing under him. ‘Ah, fuck, princess, I’m gonna cum, fuck!’ Jimin moans, his thrusts slowing completely as he cums into the condom, his fingers still working on my clit. ‘Stop, Jimin,’ I say, slapping his hand away when the overstimulation kicks in.

Obligingly, Jimin pulls out of me, standing up and pulling off his condom, throwing it into the bin in the corner of my room. I slowly rise up from the bed, shakily walking over to my bathroom to go for a wee (no UTIs here, thank you very much), and when I go back into my room, Jimin’s redressing, beginning to pull his jeans on. ‘What are you doing?’ I ask, and he looks at me dumbfounded. ‘Um, I’m getting dressed,’ he says, his tone indicating how obvious it is. ‘I know that, I mean why,’ I say impatiently. ‘So I don’t show up to the frat house naked,’ he says in the same tone, and I roll my eyes. ‘Stay the night. It’s late, why would you go back home now?’ I ask, and he grins at me. ‘You sure, princess?’ he asks, and I nod exasperatedly. ‘Don’t make me regret offering,’ I say, picking up his t-shirt from the floor and pulling it on before grabbing a clean pair of pants from my wardrobe, pulling those on to. When I turn to face Jimin again, he’s lying in the bed, just in his boxers, watching me with a small smile. ‘You look so good in that shirt,’ he compliments as I climb into the bed beside him, taking a sip from the bottle of water sat on my windowsill. ‘How do you want me?’ I ask, and he smirks at me. ‘Another round already, princess?’ he asks, and I sigh tiredly. ‘You know what I mean,’ I say, and he chuckles. ‘I wanna spoon you,’ he says shamelessly, and I turn away from him, lying down. He lies down beside me, snaking his arms around my waist and pulling me closer to him so my back presses against his chest, my head tucked beneath his chin. ‘Goodnight, princess,’ he says tiredly. ‘Goodnight, Jimin,’ I reply, already drifting off to sleep, feeling so safe and comfortable in his arms.

#bts #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #bts smut #bts jimin #jimin #park jimin #bts au #jimin smut #park jimin smut #jimin fanfic #jimin fanfiction

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svtcarat-exo-l · 6 years

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A Monsta X one-shot - bad-boy Minhyuk x reader College au

(warnings: Bullying) Word count: 5k

A/N: I got carried away with this, but I'm super proud of it! So Enjoy (Also I don't own this gif)

It was like a scene from a bad, early 2000’s teen movie.

You could’ve pictured the freeze frame in your head complete with the trademark record scratch.

There was you - shirt soaked with boiling coffee, the villainess - with the empty cup in hand and a face full of evil intent, and there was the crowd - equally as shocked as you but simultaneously entertained in the way people are when they get to watch a spat they aren't involved in.

Though unfortunately for you this wasn’t a movie, and that coffee wasn’t a safe prop. It was too hot to even be considered drinkable and it scalded you through the shirt clinging to your skin. Pain took the breath straight out of your lungs, and you couldn’t focus enough to understand the words the girl yelled vehemently in your face.

The girl - you think she’s from your class - looks less than happy.

No, she was from your class; top student if you weren’t mistaken, and you’d just scored higher than her on the exam. And been awarded the music production internship ahead of her.

Well that explains things

Only two students in the program got the opportunity, and you were chosen along with a boy in the class above you, named Wonho. (But no one in their right mind would confront a Monsta x member unless they were looking for a black eye.)

So, that made you the only possible victim for the jealousy of others. You had been an underdog in the running. A student with promising talent but the least amount of training. You guessed the choice didn’t sit well with some due to the molten drink on your chest.

Speaking of your chest and that molten drink, the pain was starting to become a little more important to your body. Important in the way that it needed to stop.

Quickly.

Onlookers finally snapped out of their shock and started laughing. The girl was still screaming, and unwanted tears started welling in your eyes. Before anything else could escalate you took off down the hallway without a second thought. Your only goal was getting away from the cold giggles and raised voices.

The only phrase you caught from the girl prior to you rounding the corner rung in your ears.

You don’t deserve it y/n, you poor bitch!

Now, you didn’t feel ashamed that you’d won the scholarship. It was something you’d worked countless hours in the school studio for considering you couldn’t afford your own equipment.

You locked yourself away on campus, through the night sometimes, to perfect every aspect of the piece, and the song you submitted after months of work spoke more about your soul than you think you could ever put into words.

You used all of your favorite instruments in the track and let the notes become emotions. Harmonies became dreams never spoken aloud, and the lyrics were words you regretted not saying. The things you wanted to express but had no means to.

That was what music was for you – a place to pour out strong emotions.

To you, humanity was nothing without music. It has the ability to bring out the empathy in everyone, the need to connect with others - their pain and happiness. Music could help people relate to one another universally. Sure, making songs had certain rules and techniques, but those alone couldn’t make something extra-ordinary. It was the heart of the songwriter that combined with those things that mattered.

In the end, it was the bit of You in the song that made it beyond the others.

But currently you didn’t feel very talented. Mainly you felt naïve for expecting everyone would be happy somehow that you’d been successful.

The seed of doubt had been planted, and you didn’t know if you could keep the plant from taking root.

Without really thinking you threw yourself through the next door you saw, slamming it behind you. Your hands were already working the buttons of your top free as you slid down the door sobbing in pain and humiliation.

You half ripped, half peeled the material from your skin and hissed at the irritation. The angry red burn stretched from your left collarbone across to the ribs on your right side. Without the pressure of your shirt the pain went down a few notches, and the relief allowed you to breathe deeper, greedily taking in oxygen you’d missed.

And you didn’t know what to do next.

Well, your rational brain did, but your current state was anything but rational. Realistically, you should try to cool down the area-

“Are you okay?”

The last person you expected to see gaped at you from the piano bench. You’d thrown yourself into the music room, a realization that came a little late, right into the middle of Lee Minhyuk's vocal practice.

Minhyuk was a part of the schools’ group of quote-unquote “Bad Boys”. He was considered the most level-headed member of Monsta X and the one you wanted to deal with if you needed to interact with the rowdy group.

He was the one least likely to take offence and ruin your reputation/face. At least in comparison with Hyungwon or Kihyun. They were the touchiest ones. Still, Minhyuk had the same reputation as the rest of them.

Handsome, confident, mischievous, and dangerous.

You’d heard enough rumors to fill an entire series of encyclopedias with scenarios scary enough to keep you up at night. You only wished that was enough to keep you from secretly admiring him.

His freedom to be what he wanted without challenges. The loyalty he showed his friends. The outspoken intelligence you’d never seen on anyone else in the entire school. He was risky, but a small part of you was screaming 'So what?'

You knew that intrigue would get you in trouble.

You’d heard him sing once and that was what got you into this mess.

One of your sessions in the studio had ended a little later than usual, so you left at a different time than you were used to. You cut through the auditorium like you always did, the backstage door was closer to the parking lot than the front entrance, and that was when you saw him.

The stage was bare, because the theatre club was in between productions. He hadn’t been doing anything spectacular to catch your attention, yet something stopped you from continuing out to your car.

Minhyuk was just lying on his back in the center of the stage singing a gentle tune you found really familiar. The peaceful aura of it all made you stop to listen. You felt like a creeper afterwards, but your feet had just frozen in place backstage like he was some sort of siren luring you in.

Except his song wouldn’t lead you out to sea to drown; Instead it was a one-way trip to heartbreak.

Still, you let yourself listen for a while. Minhyuk’s voice was beautiful to you, husky and warm with excellent timbre. Goosebumps rose on your arms at a beautiful vaulting high note that resounded through the theatre effortlessly. He cursed when he fumbled over the next phrase then started it again.

You could’ve fallen for the boy you saw in that moment.

He was unbridled, freely singing whatever song came to mind not caring how his face looked or how his uniform wrinkled. For once the typical smirk wasn’t permanently attached to his lips. Instead he smiled. A genuine one at that. The ghost light illuminated one side of his face, and the glow settled into his features - sharpening his elegant bone structure.

That boy. The one before your eyes, was one you could see yourself enjoying the company of. Unfortunately, that boy was like that moment.

Fleeting.

Outside of that snapshot in time he was The Minhyuk of Monsta x, someone you should have wanted nothing to do with, and not just a cute boy with a nice voice. So, you’d turned yourself around and made to leave with the intent of him never knowing you were there.

Unfortunately, fate wasn’t having that.

In the darkness you kicked a table by accident and that caused something else to fall with a loud bang. You hadn't even glanced back before darting out as quick as you could.

Every time you saw Minhyuk after that you couldn’t shake the image of him from that day or your hopeless feelings.

Music room 3 was essentially his. The entire student body knew this room was always reserved for him after classes. Trying not to disturb the boy was a school-wide event when passing through the western hallway. And now you were sitting on his floor asking him to use the wrath of his group on you.

As if things couldn’t get worse.

“Hey, are you alright.” He questioned you again.

Despite all you thought you knew about him; You didn’t look so scary right now, concern in his eyes as they roamed the burn. His gaze didn’t feel even vaguely threatening – more like he was trying to discern how to help opposed to checking you out. It took a second for you to remember you sat there with your shirt open.

The two of you came to that conclusion at the same moment. His eyes snapped to your face and you scrambled cross your arms in front of you but yelped instantly at the stab of pain the action sent through you.

Alarm filled his eyes, but he seemed to read the discomfort on your face, because he swiftly turned his back and faced away from you.

“Shit, I’m sorry y/n.” He choked out. “I wasn’t trying to – I mean – Ah, sorry.”

Smooth

It surprised you though. You weren’t aware he even knew your name.

The rumors said he’d be the type to take advantage of your exposure and try to flirt with you or use some pick-up line, but he seemed more flustered than you. The little bit of privacy his action gave you was comforting and you had to admit it was gentlemanly – until panic about who you were talking to set in.

“I-I’m sorry! I didn’t realize what room this was I just-”

“Don’t worry about it.”

His composure was back and the level voice he used was almost soothing even when you couldn’t see his face. You found yourself relaxing. His tone was warm, so maybe you could get yourself out of this without making him angry. It was just going to be awkward talking to the back of his head.

“What happened?” Minhyuk asked.

“It’s just a coffee burn.” You answered vaguely while you thought of ways to get out of the room. Minhyuk hummed in thought and you found it endearing.

Okay scratch that - You needed to get out of this room before you ended up leaving your heart somewhere risky.

Namely – with him.

“You spill it on yourself?” Minhyuk surprised you by continuing his questions. He was nonchalant about it, but there was something else in his voice that definitely wasn’t indifference.

“No.” You couldn’t find it in yourself to try and lie to him. Not that it mattered. The entire school had probably heard about the scene earlier anyways

“Was it an accident?”

You bit your lip and hesitated. His voice that used to hold a softness was growing hard. Angry. The tension in his shoulders was coiling like a spring. You didn’t understand the reaction, but it made you nervous regardless.

“No.” you answered airily.

His next words were so quiet you strained to hear them.

“Someone purposefully threw boiling coffee on you.” He was beyond mad now and it gave you chills. Not seeing his expression only made it worse.

Minhyuk was the hardest one to anger, and those who managed it - transferred schools. And now you were in the same room with a livid Monsta x member. You just thanked your stars that it wasn’t directed at you.

He released a long exhale that mostly dissolved the tension and you subconsciously breathed with him. You had wanted to leave, but now curiosity had you in its grip. That much anger wasn’t a normal reaction to someone you didn’t know being hurt. Pity – maybe - but not rage.

“How bad is it?” Another question that threw you off.

Glancing down at the red splotches didn’t give you much information and your mind was still a little out of focus. You were burned, that was a given – You just didn’t know how badly.

“I can’t really tell.”

He used the same soothing voice again. “Just describe it to me, I can get an idea.”

“It’s – ah – bright red. No blisters or anything like that. And it feels warm, uh, maybe just a little swollen?”

The sigh of relief you heard from him almost made you giggle before you remembered who he was. He wasn’t supposed to be remotely cute, and you weren’t supposed to start thinking maybe he wasn’t as bad as he wanted people to think. But he was, and you were.

“It doesn’t sound too serious, That’s good.” You almost felt you could hear the smile in his voice.

“I have an extra shirt.” He didn’t have to ask in the form of a question - you knew he was trying to give you something to change into.

Before you could question his kindness he walked over to his bag sitting against the wall and pulled out a white T-shirt. Then he clamped one hand over his eyes before turning to walk towards you. You figured he spent enough time in the room to know the layout without looking.

You couldn’t stop yourself from letting your eyes roam his face while he couldn’t see you. He was as handsome as you remembered; that fact was easy to admit. A strong jaw line, surprisingly delicate lips, the glowing deep brown orbs hidden behind his hand. He looked adorably innocent blocking his eyes like that. It was a look you’d seen only once on his face before.

Not that you looked at him a lot or anything.

And now not only was he handsome, but he was secretly kind as well. His continued effort to respect your modesty was endearing in a way. You were starting to have a harder time ignoring the interest you had for the boy.

It was easier when you could blind yourself with nasty rumors, but the person you’d seen in the auditorium that night was turning out to be more real than you thought.

You stood up to meet him halfway, and after you accepted his shirt he turned back around again.

When you unfolded it, you couldn’t help the snort of laughter that escaped you.

On the front there was a little cartoon design of a tea bag with the words ‘It’s a tea-shirt’ written underneath. You thought you saw his ears go a little red for a second, but you brushed it away. You slid your shirt all the way off your shoulders and cringed at the soggy plop it made when it hit the floor. The lighter material of his shirt felt a lot more comfortable against your skin

“Thank you.” You said to his back and he understood that you were decent.

He finally faced you and you smiled hesitantly.

He smiled at you for the first time and you kind of understood the girls who fell at his feet. It was a smile worth begging for. His eyes lingered on his shirt for a second.

“You’re welcome. It, ah, looks good on you.” There was an awkward pause where you wrung your hands, he scratched the back of his neck, and you battled it out to see who could blush the most until he spoke again. “Listen, ah, maybe you should go to the nurse I’m sure- “

“No!” You cut him off and flinched at the volume of your own voice. “I-I’d have to walk past the cafeteria again and...”

You hoped your classmates’ anger had faded now that she’d acted out and humiliated you in public, but you were sure she was still vengeful. The internship was a rare one that many people had wanted. It wouldn’t be surprising if more students agreed with her actions. The thought scared you a little.

He’d obviously read the narrative in your eyes, because his face softened immediately.

“You can stay here. I mean, I wouldn't let anyone bother you.”

He was starting to get into the habit of surprising you at every turn. So far Minhyuk had been chivalrous, generous, and nothing like you’d convinced yourself he was. Maybe you were wrong to dismiss what you’d seen that night. Maybe ‘The Minhyuk of Monsta x’ was really the false one.

“Are you sure? I wouldn’t want to interrupt.” The protest was a weak one and you knew it. You wanted to stay too - much more than you were ready to admit.

“Believe me I’ve practiced enough, it’d be nice to have a break.” You knew you could never resist that look he was giving you anyways: his eyes vulnerable, sensitive, brown pools.

“Okay.”

You couldn’t think of anything else to say and he stayed quiet, so eventually you moved to sit on the piano bench and he joined you soon after. Minhyuk started to play a song and sing lowly to the tune as a way to break the silence.

The piece was what he’d been singing the night you saw him in the auditorium.

It was a bittersweet song about young lovers who never shared their feelings and that caused them to let each other drift away. It suited his slightly raspy voice.

You let yourself watch his profile as he played. Minhyuk closed his eyes and rocked his shoulders along to the tempo. His graceful fingers floated across the keys gently if not reverently, and the piano responded with the bittersweet melody you’d come to associate with the beautiful man in front of you.

The emotions in the song were clear in his entire being, and while his entire body reacted to the music; you had a moment of crystal-clear clarity.

The bad image you’d built of him shattered.

Music was a language you understood, more than words sometimes, and he was sending a message direct to you.

The is the real Minhyuk.

He looked up from the piano as you started singing along and caught your eyes. The corners of his mouth quirked up into a grin that lit up his face. The expression juxtaposed the sorrowful lyrics yet it still felt slightly sad somehow.

A smile grew on your face too. You looked away but couldn’t wipe it from your lips as he played the final bridge of the song. You would’ve been content to just bask in the calm aura instead of facing the problems that were burying you under their weight. The last note had long faded when he finally spoke again, softly, like he didn’t want to break the moment.

“Can you tell me everything that happened now?”

And so, you did. You told him about being chosen for the scholarship and your classmate’s reaction. Then the coffee and the humiliation that came later. By the time you finished with your entrance into the music room he was already on his feet, pacing.

Then his face set into the mask you now recognized as fake Minhyuk. Angry Minhyuk. Monsta x's Minhyuk.

He basically growled his next words as he strode to the door. “You stay here. There are some people who need to be set straight.”

“Woah, woah wait.” You were barely able to stop him from getting to his destination by sliding between him and the door.

Minhyuk stared down at you with an intensity that made you forget the words you’d intended to say next for a second. Noticing that you’d laid both hands flat against his chest was enough to jolt you back into the moment as you pulled your hands away. “You don’t really know me, why do you want to go out and defend my honor.”

“I’ve noticed you y/n.” He admitted in a soft voice.

He really needed to stop rendering you speechless. You’d daydreamed the exact words coming out of his mouth, yet it was still so hard to believe them – so you reflexively tried to deny what he was saying.

“How? I-I mean we’ve never really talked- “

“It was your music." He was quick to explain himself. "Wonho let me hear your music and I’ve been intrigued ever since. The way you make music is just captivating.”

You could hear the bashful note in his voice at the admission.

Oh sweet mother of music production.

You knew you’d frozen up. It was just hard to form a coherent thought when the literal man of your dreams had just admitted he cared for you.

It wasn’t unusual that Wonho had heard your song considering you’d both competed against each other. What as unusual was that he’d liked it – enough to get a copy and show it to his friends.

Minhyuk leaned down until your gazes crossed paths again and he spoke his next words in a way that not even your mind could argue with. “You’re Talented, driven, intelligent, beautiful Y/N. I’d been trying to think of a way to talk to you for weeks, but I didn’t know how."

All the little things you’d made yourself discount over the months flashed like a montage in your mind.

The times you’d seen him pop into the studio with Wonho while you were working on something and they’d hang around for a second longer than they needed to. Or when snacks would show up on your desk when you skipped lunch. The one time a classmate started bullying you, but the next day he showed up to class he didn’t even look at you.

You’d think with the amount of time you spent paying attention to him, you’d have realized he was doing it right back.

“I notice you too.” The words escaped before you could stop them. “I don’t know why, T-there’s just something about you.”

“Devilishly good looks.” He teased while pushing a stray piece of hair behind your ear.

You not immediately rejecting him ramped up his confidence it seemed, yet you saw the insecurity he was covering with the joke. He was afraid to let you in.

“No. It’s – You’re free.” You laughed lightly before continuing. “No one tells you who to be, what to do, how to live. I wish I could be more like that.”

Idly, you reached out to fix the collar of his shirt just to give your hands something to do.

“It’s lonely to be like me.” He let his hand come to rest against your cheek. The warning did little to affect you as you leaned into the contact. Although, the wistful expression written in his features made your chest ache just a little. .

It seemed tragic he felt like he needed to warn you off.

Little did he know you were far beyond the point of no return.

“It doesn’t have to be. If you let someone in.” You allowed your hands to once again lay on his chest. From the look in his eyes you could tell the idea scared him, but you tried your best to convey your sincerity.

You wanted him to know that you were prepared to accept anything that came with being with him, but he changed the subject before you could organize your thoughts.

“I knew you were there; That night in the theatre.” Minhyuk was trying to lead the conversation somewhere, so you decided to go with it.

“I figured. I wasn’t very quiet, I’m sorry-“

“Don’t be Y/N. It’s been a long time since someone has looked at me and seen more than a delinquent or some hot guy to conquest.”

There was that intense sadness again. You moved your hand to run it through his hair and smiled at him. He looked at you with an extremely cute confused face.

“Minhyuk, before that day I believed what people said, that you were dangerous.” You felt him tense, but you pushed on quickly. “But then that night I saw this side to you that wasn’t at all what I expected. I was just afraid that wasn’t real. But then today you turned out to really be that guy I saw on stage singing with his heart and you continue to surprise me at every turn.”

The sad look softened to a tenderness as he finally seemed to get that you weren’t going to run screaming anytime soon. Minhyuk let himself lean forward that last few inches needed to press his forehead against yours.

“I want to get to know you.” He whispered before drawing back a few inches to meet your eyes. “You’re way too good for me, and I know I have a reputation, but-”

It was your turn to cut him off. “Minhyuk. I think I’m done listening to what people who don’t know you say. I’m want to decide for myself, and I want to get to know you too.”

His smile was blinding when he pulled you into his arms fully.

After a few moments he spoke up. “I’m still going to put the fear of god into them for hurting my girlfriend.”

You laughed and pulled yourself from his hold playfully only to laugh harder at the pout on his lips. “Oh? And when did we decide that I’m your girlfriend, Lee Minhyuk?”

He pretended to think for a second before dropping a surprise kiss on your forehead. “Right now?”

He gave you puppy dog eyes that rivaled any Casanova’s until you gave in – not that you were fighting him anyways – it was just fun to banter with him. You sighed in mock annoyance while he laced his hands with yours. Already, you knew that look was one you’d never be able to refuse.

“You’re lucky I like you, Weirdo.” You teased.

“Ditto.” Minhyuk replied in a sing-song voice while leading you to the door.

You pointed a finger at him as you walked out of the music room. “And Lee Minhyuk, don’t you dare beat up people for me.”

He had to cross his eyes to see your finger and the expression nearly cracked your serious façade. He moved your hand like it was a loaded weapon before responding.

“Okay… But only because you asked.” He took a breath when a new idea hit him. “And only if you cool it with the full name thing. It makes me feel like I’m in trouble.”

“Okay.” You paused before whispering with mischief. “Lee Minhyuk.”

“Yah that’s it!” He moved to tickle your sides, but he never got close to touching you because you stood on your toes and pressed your lips to his. Later, you could question why you decided to do it, but right then it was everything you thought it would be. After a few seconds he caught up to you and Minhyuk's hands came to rest on your shoulders lightly – pulling you in an inch more.

He only broke off when a familiar voice called out from down the hallway. The voice you could only associate with coffee and the burn across your chest.

“Oh, so you found yourself a boy to leech off of, Y/n.” The girl scoffed. “I knew you were poor. I just didn’t think you were desperate.”

Without looking you could already tell she couldn’t see Minhyuk’s face from her angle, and before you could stop him he lunged into her sightline. You watched her eyes widen in shock.

“That’s not how I’d define ‘desperate’.” His voice was calm but held enough venom to freeze your classmate on the spot. The cold laugh that came next made even you uncomfortable.

“No – desperate is the way you trail behind Jooheon every hour of the day for even one second of his attention-“

By then your classmate had dropped her gaze and you could hear her sniffles. As much as you wanted to indulge in some revenge, humiliating her right back wasn’t a low you would stoop to. Right as Minhyuk made to step closer to her, your hand closed around his wrist.

“That’s enough, Minhyuk.” He glanced back at you with two raised eyebrows and you only shook your head at him. “Let her go.”

Your classmate was long gone not even seconds after he waved her away.

Alone again, Minhyuk wrapped you up in his arms again and lightly kissed your temple. “You okay?”

“I’m fine.” You replied, settling in his grip.

“You deserve that internship, you know? Don’t let her make you feel like you don’t.”

Remember that seed of doubt? His words helped you uproot it.

“I know.”

You let him comfortably hold you for a few minutes and the tension melted away from both of you. Then you felt Minhyuk tap your back slightly and you drew back to see him deep in thought.

“You know….” He paused. “You never said I couldn’t ask Hyungwon to beat them up.”

“Minhyuk no” You laughed.

“Catch me if you can!” He called while taking off at full speed towards the parking lot.

You prepared to run after him until an idea struck you.

“Hey Minhyuk!” You yelled. “I love you.”

You waited a few seconds until you heard footsteps coming back your way. He swept you right back into his hold, kissed you fully again, and whispered in your ear.

“Ditto.”

239 notes · View notes

iliketowrite1996 · 6 years

Text

Only You Part 1

TRIGGER WARNING- DIVORCE, HEARTBREAK

I have found that I enjoy writing differently than the usual fluff I used to write. So this will be a mixture of fluff and angst and reality. I have never written anything like this before, so I would love constructive ideas on how to be better. I am always super nervous when I post lol. This is part one of a four part series.

The ink from where you signed your name on the divorce papers dried faster than your tears did when they streamed down your face at one in the morning, and lasted longer than your marriage with T’Challa had.

Well.

At least you something about this marriage is permanent.

You’d been married for ten years.

You’ve known each other for fifteen years.

You dated for three of those years.

You were married for ten of those years.

Two children.

Six year old daughter.

Three year old son.

One marriage.

Millions of pieces.

You can still see the look on his face when he called it quits, citing irreconcilable differences at as the cause. You can still hear your voices cracking at three in the morning that night, and you remember how grateful you were that the children were out with Ramonda and Shuri at another charity event that Shuri was hosting.

You remember the heated words that rose up out of your throat like bile, and tasted just as bitter. Like bile, they came up with very little warning, and you spewed them across your husband, your best friend, your lover.

Well, he used to be.

How did you end up here?

How did something that you worked so hard to build up fall apart, and you feel powerless to do anything about it?

Here not only being the small kitchen of your modest yet stylish apartment at three am, nursing a cup of coffee and reading over your itinerary for tomorrow.

To the day, you and T’Challa have officially been divorced six months.

That’s 182.5 days.

Three almost calls, where you had to put your kimoyo beads in a drawer to forget about him.

Eight weekends that the children have spent with T’Challa before being escorted back to you.

Three word sentences used as casual greetings when he drops the children off, or when you pick them up, or really any time you have to interact with each other.

‘’How are you?’’

‘’I’m fine. You?’’

‘’Good. Bye, kids.’’

‘’I love you,’’ to the kids, then one more goodbye to each other.

Children say goodbye, you say goodbye to him, he says goodbye to you. You begin your new weekends.

Repeat all over again.

‘’Mommy,’’ you hear a soft voice coming from the doorway to your kitchen, and you look up to see your six year old daughter, Adanya.

She’s crying her stuffed black panther, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.

‘’Come here, baby. Why are you still awake?’’

She crawls into your lap, and you see T’Challa’s eyes are staring back at you. She is T’Challa in the cheeks, in the eyes, in the smile. She’s even got his thick, coarse hair, which is styled into three braids with barrettes at the end at the moment.

‘’I had a bad dream’’ she lays her head on your shoulder, relaxing into your embrace as you press a kiss to her forehead.

‘’I’m sorry, sweetheart. Do you want to sleep in mommy’s room?’’

She nods against your shoulder,and you stand, carrying your daughter to the room.

When you get there, your son, Ado, is already there, holding onto his teddy bear and staring at you with wide eyes.

‘’I put him here before I came. I knew he’d be scared if he woke up and I wasn’t there,’’ Adanya explains as she climbs into your bed.

‘’You’re such a nice big sister,’’ you tell her, crawling into bed in between your children, ‘’We all need to go back to sleep. It is late, and we have to be up early tomorrow.’’

‘’Mommy,’’ your son whines, and you look over to him.

If Adanya is the near carbon copy of T’Challa, just with softer and younger features, then your son is you. He has your smile, your eyes. Personality-wise, your daughter is you- more outgoing than her brother, ready to jump into a new adventure. Ado likes to sit back and olay out situations before acting, much like his dad, He us, unfortunately, every bit as stubborn as T’Challa. As is your daughter.

Which is why it takes thirty minutes, two stories, and one lullaby for the children to fall asleep.

It takes you thirty more minutes, countless thoughts, and one look at the time to do the same.

The next day, you arrive with your children and Ayo at the banquet center. T’Challa is meeting you there, and you will be sitting together for lunch. Other than that, though, you won’t be interacting with him much.

The whole Udaku family is involved in this program. T’Challa is working with soon to be graduates who want to attend university in Wakanda but lack all of the funds. Shuri is doing a STEM workshop with young women, showing them how to use vibranium in science and how she comes up with her inventions. Ramonda is leading a seminar about the history of Wakanda. You are reading to young students, traditional stories from Wakanda. You are also showing them how to do dances- the same ones that T’Challa taught you on your honeymoon.

You bite back that thought and those memories the way that you bite your tongue when you want to tell him more, when you want to open up that box that you both closed after your divorce.

‘’Alright, remember what mommy said- be on our best behavior, Stay close to grandma Ramonda, auntie Shuri, daddy, or me. If you have to leave for the bathroom and one of us can not take you, you tell either You or Okoye. Okay?’’

‘’Okay, mommy,’’ Ado nods, clutching his stuffed panther and looking up at you with bright eyes.

‘’And no talking to strangers unless daddy or I are with you, alright,’’ you direct your look to Adanya this time, and she nods as well. ‘’Good.’’

You enter the banquet center then, the air conditioned environment a welcomed contrast from the dry heat outside. You barely have time to get the children settled at your assigned table, right in the center, before you are being pulled into a hug.

‘’Oh, I’ve missed you! How is my sister doing,’’ Shuri pulls back to look at you, a wide smile on her face.

Ever since the divorce, your relationship with Shuri has been a bit strained. She will come by once or twice a week and visit with you a short while before taking her niece and nephew out for the day while you got work done. A month after the divorce was finalized, she’d stopped by to check on you.

‘’I really think you and I should stay friends, ‘’she’d said, ‘’For one, whatever happened between you and T’Challa is none of my business until either of you wants to tell me. Second, I want to see my niece and nephew more than when they come to the palace. And, lastly, you are my friend. My sister. Your relationship with T’Challa doesn’t change that.’’

Honestly, you don’t know what you’d do without her, especially these past few months.

At least a few things in your life stayed the same.

‘’Shuri,’ you hug her, stepping back to look at her, ‘’I love this dress on you. Purple makes your skin look radiant.’’

‘’My skin always looks radiant, big sister,’’ she laughs, her white teeth showing.

‘’Auntie Shuri, do I look radio too,’’ Adanya questions, reaching her arms up for her aunty to carry her.

‘’Of course, my perfect niece,’’ Shuri presses a kiss to Adanya cheek, delighting in her niece’s giggles, ‘’Where’s your brother?’’

‘’Here I am!,’’ he raises his arms, and Shuri sets Adanya down to pick up Ado.

‘’My handsome, smart little man! Can Auntie Shuri have a hug?’’

Ado is a very loving little boy. He always is cuddling up to you when you have free time, and always wants to be around you. In that way, he is very much like his dad.

Speaking of which.

‘’Daddy!,’’ Ayanda screams, running over to her dad as he enters the banquet hall.

Right behind him are Tony Stark, Bucky Barnes, Sam Wilson and Steve Rogers- his special guests for the day.

‘’There is my princess,’’ T’Challa grins widely as he picks up your baby girl, swinging her around before pulling her close and pressing loving kisses to her forehead and cheeks.

You still love him, especially in moments like this. For every moment that you two fought, for every downfall you had as husband and wife, you are good parents. Those children are the best parts of both you and him, and with their own personalities mixed in.

And you try not to fall deeper love, because you know that if you dive even deeper, you may not ever come back to surface.

But you have to start getting over this.

So you take a deep breath.

Inhale.

Exhale.

Take in the scene as you take in a breath.

Let go of your marriage as you let out that breath.

‘’Baba,’’ Ado reaches for his dad, who happily takes his son and lifts him into the air.

‘’And my prince!,’’ T’Challa kisses his son’s curls.

You feel your heart flip when you make eye contact with T’Challa for the first time in a week, and your stomach does the same.

And it makes you happy and bitter at the same time- happy because you know that what you had was real if you still get butterflied where he’s concerned. Bitter because you’re still getting those butterflies, and you want to move on.

But those ten years of marriage, after three years of dating, don’t go easily. And you have to remind yourself of that on a daily basis.

‘’It is good to see you,’’ T’Challa tells you, and you can not tell if he means it or if he is just being cordial.

The one thing that you could agree on was to be cordial in front of the kids. Of course, it was easier before today- your interactions were limited to when he picked up or dropped off the children and vice versa. Now, when you will be spending a whole lunch together, you have to try harder.

And try you do.

You keep up small talk with Ramonda when she arrives, unsure of where you stand with her. In fact, her answers are short. She speaks to you for about fifteen minutes before she turns to Steve and Tony, and makes conversation with them. It is in that moment that you are grateful for Shuri, because she lightens things up a bit for you.

You eat your potatoes, rice, and chicken, cutting up Ado’s as T’Challa helpa Adanya cut her chicken into smaller bites.

You eat dinner, make small talk, smile.

Later, you read to the students, acting out the different animals and the characters in the folk tales.

Finally, it’s nearly time t go home, and you have two sleeping children t get to the car.

‘’I can carry Adanya for you, if you want,’’ T’Challa offers as you balance your son and the children’s bag.

‘’That would be great. Thank you,’’ you sigh as he lifts his daughter into his arms, padding across the parking lot with you to the waiting car.

‘’What time can I expect you to come pick the children up tomorrow,’’ you question as you strap them into their car seats.

‘’I shall be there at noon. In the event that I can not make it, I will send Okoye.’’

‘’Got it,’’ you nod before turning to him, ‘’Um, thanks again, T’Challa.’’

‘’No problem. I mean, they are my children, too. This is the least that I can do.’’

You are about to slide into your car then, before he says your name, stopping you.

‘’Adanya asked me something quite scary today.’’

‘’Oh? What was it,’’ you ask, your voice laced with concerned for your oldest.

‘’She asked me some more questions about the divorce,’’ he reveals, ‘’He thinks that you and I hate each other.’’

‘’What would give her that idea,’’ you ask, your voice cracking.

You can’t hate him. You tried to when the mess hit the fan, and found that you just couldn't do it. You know that you two had it all, and it’s what you wish you still had. It’s like when you break a vase- you try to catch all of the pieces to maybe salvage it, but that vase is destroyed,

‘’I do not know,’’ he shrugs, looking at you with a raised eyebrow, ‘’Why would you do that?’’

The implications of his tone and choice of words are very clear, and you feel a fresh wave of rage crashing through you.

‘’Are you implying that I speak ill of you to our children? Because I do not. I will allow them to form their own opinions of you, Mr. Udaku.’’

He kisses his teeth then, and pinches the bridge of his nose in frustration.

A position you found yourself in with him several times towards the end of your marriage.

‘’Maybe we should just get back on track,’’ he states, ‘’Anyway. I assured her that I do not hate you. I assume that you do not hate me, either.’’

There are things about him that you dislike- the moments when he’s crude and cynical, like you feel he is being at the moment.

So you relax.

Inhale.

Exhale.

Moving on.

‘’I do not hate you, T’Challa. I never will,’’you say, because that is one more consistent thing in your life.

‘’Thank you,’’ he seems a bit caught off guard, ‘’I assured her that we’d both go to her recital tomorrow, and afterwards, to dinner. I think that it is only fair that we try to maintain a positive relationship with each other. Given the nature of our… of our relationship right now, I think we need to set up some new rules. For the kids.’’

The little glimmer of hope that you had that he was saying that because he still feels something real for you vanishes as quickly as it comes, and you nearly berate yourself for wondering how such a thought could enter your mind.

‘’Of course. For the children,’’ you agree, sliding into your car, ‘’I will have the children ready for you to have lunch with your mother. I will see you tomorrow, T’Challa.’’

He says goodnight and goodbye to you, and you try to ignore the way your heart feels when he says your name.

You drive home, put your children to bed in their room and head to your own room.

The moonlight flows into your bedroom then, and you bathe in its light as you slip into a nightgown and crawl into bed. You stare up at the moon as you think back on today, and how things ended. This time last year, things with T’Challa were shaky, but he would have been in this bed beside you, cuddled up to you and asleep or pressing kisses to your cheek or struggling to get comfortable as your children lounged across the bed with you.

Now, though, the moonlight is the only thing that fills that empty spot next to you, and you fall asleep to that.

And you try to banish any thoughts of T’Challa from your mind for the night

Disclaimer- I do not own any Marvel Characters or their fictional words. Rights to those belong to their rightful and respectful owners.

#t'challa x you #t'challa udaku #t'challa #t'challa x reader #shuri #shuri udaku #shuri black panther #black panther x you #black panther imagine #black panther #imagines #imagine #imagine request

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littlespacestars · 6 years

Text

Shallura Fic Rec #3

Time for another Shallura fic rec list! (categorized to the best of my ability)

Shallura Rec List #1

Shallura Rec List #2

Mulitchapter/Long Fics

(I’m including fics that have been updated/concluded since the last fic rec list)

Into the Woods - (3/3) - @andtheblueberrymuffin

Something wet and cold splatters against Allura’s cheek.

A moment later, a second drop lands on her forehead, and she groans, raising a hand to rub at her face. She feels… groggy, as though she just woke from a long, deep sleep. The wetness on her face makes no sense. She cracks her eyes open and finds that she is staring up at a gray sky, full of storm clouds, heavy with rain.

This is not where she last remembers being.

Or: The one where Allura and Shiro end up lost in space.

Slow burn, hurt/comfort, plot, huddling for warmth, mystery, feelings, gore related to hunting

The Princess and the Pilot - (5/?) - @ashesandhoney

In an alternate timeline, Shiro gets picked up by the Galra before the war starts and eventually ends up being given to the Princess of the Alteans as a joke or an attempt to start a war or as a mistake. Whatever their motive was for sending him, Allura is now left trying to figure out what to do with him.

Alternate universe, slow burn, prisoner Shiro

The Space Between Stars - (6/?) - wordswithdragons ( @shiroallura)

Stranded across the galaxy, Shiro and Keith must survive the cold blooded creatures that lurk upon the planet they crash landed on. Pidge, Hunk and Lance find themselves caught up on a Galra infested planet of winged aliens, while Allura and Coran face coming to terms with their greatest hope and sorrow: Altea. // A rewriting, fix-it fic of season two, featuring families, backstories, aliens, loss, and love. More info inside.

No Need To Say Goodbye - (1/1) - @smolsarcasticraspberry

The juniberry tree blossoms every seven years, and when it does, a gateway opens up to another world - a world that Shiro first explores as a child. There, he meets Allura. They do not speak the same language, but children do not need words to play. Every seven years, when the gateway opens again, Shiro steps through to visit the girl he knows on the other side. But the gateway only stays open as long as the juniberry flowers bloom...

AU, angst, childhood friends, reunion

Masks - (1/5) - @braincoins

Shiro screws-up and Allura has to cover for him by pretending they're married. This means Shiro is now involved in the negotiations with an alien race rumored to have sent the Galra packing. They could be a great help to the Coalition, so long as they're not offended or insulted in some way. So it's Allura's job to convince them to sign on, and it's Shiro's job to be her consort. Neither of those should be that difficult... right?

Fake/pretend relationship, semi-au, Fluff & Politics, pining!Shiro, the other paladins & Coran are here too but not as much

When We Were Young - (8/8) - @ashesandhoney

When they were young they had hidden under tables at embassy events and eaten stolen pieces of cake. They had climbed up onto the roof at school and made up stories about the teachers walking to their cars at the end of the day. They weren’t the same species but that had never stopped them before.

It’s been tens years since he last saw her.

Childhood friends, AU - canon divergence, marriage proposal, alien culture, no Voltron

Find Me In The Night - (2/2) - @smolsarcasticraspberry

"Ah, yes. Charged particles from your local star interact with the magnetic field of the planet in areas where the magnetic field lines are close together."

Shiro laughs, in spite of himself. She's the nerdiest princess he's ever met. Not that he's met many, of course. Or any at all, before her.

"We call it an aurora. It's beautiful, isn't it?"

***

When aliens land on Earth looking for a mysterious weapon under the Arctic ice, Captain Shirogane of the Galaxy Garrison is tasked with accompanying an alien Princess in her quest.

Mature, Shallura Holidays Month 2017, Pre-Kerberos Mission, Earth AU, winter fic

Touch - (3/3) - @ashesandhoney

The Sacred Alteans could bend quintessence to their whims but wielding that much power couldn't be consequence free.

Allura loses her sense of touch and has to learn to function without it.

A fic with scenes including: nearly bleeding to death, some angst over being the last of a species, fancy ballgowns and space pirates, tickling, sparring practice, Shiro being really into Allura wearing track pants, blow job jokes, quite a bit of pining, Allura glowing, some smut.

Explicit, mutual pining, fluff, mild hurt/comfort, AU - Canon Divergence, light angst

Of Small Talks and Forget-me-nots - (6/6) - Part 1 - Opl_Mor

Shiro has been chasing Allura since he was six and she stumbled into his land of make believe- his escape from the strain between his parents. A misfit pair with no one but each other try to navigate an often cruel and unforgiving world. Unfortunately, fate isn't always kind and sometimes pairs are pulled apart. This is a story of hardships and heartbreak, but more than that, it's about the power of mending those parts of life. This is about a modern princess saving a lonely boy in more ways than she could possibly know.

Childhood friends, friends to lovers, bullying, divorce, Shiro’s got a lisp, Allura is a ballerina black belt

Woman King - (20/20) - @juniperallura

Queen Allura rules over the Altean court, in the company of her young cousin Lance. As the bloody war with the Galra drags on, she searches for unlikely allies- including a supposed defector dwelling on the edge of the palace village. A Shallura historical/fantasy AU (with side Klance).

AU - historical, AU - fantasy, side Klance, light angst, slow burn, pining, mutul pining, secret relationship

When the Sun Sets - (4/?) - rainingWolf

Out of everyone in the entire galaxy, Shiro just so happened to chance upon Allura on a starry night. Set in a zombie apocalypse AU.

Zombie apocalypse, Zombie AU, romance, drama, action/adventure, angst, Altea, alien planet

Across the Universe - (2/?) - saintgenevieve

Allura takes a deep breath. “Pidge…what is a soulmate?”

“What?”

“Shiro told Keith I was his ‘soulmate,’ but I don’t really understand what that word means.”

Mature, Pining, serious pining and angst, Allura’s relationship with the paladins, friendship, love confessions, true love, grieving, some Klance

Loving the Alien - (3/?) - hatandgoggles

The story takes place in 1954, in a town in New Mexico. Roughly seven years after a mysterious object crashed into the nearby desert, a woman Shiro met that night returns to his diner when he needs it the most. Or will she only drag him into an adventure he never asked for?

AU - 1950s

Let Go Darling - (1/?) - evelyn_hayes

Allura blinks. She's suddenly outside, the pale moon shining down on her and the old house behind her. There's a man gripping her hand. Tall and shrouded in a peculiar jacket. His hood shadows his face, but she makes out a scar across his nose and a patch of white hair dangling from the front of his head. She searches his face and sees-

Black eyes.

Witch!Allura, Hunter!Allura, Demon!Shiro, alchemy, magic, crossover, feat. the IMPALA BABY, but in white, guadian demon, self-harm, road trips, true names, vassal and liege, angst, klance fluff, Shiro has PTSD, protective Shiro, implied/referenced abuse/torture, businessman Lotor

There is Love in Your Body (But You Can’t Get it Out) - (1/1) - @andtheblueberrymuffin

In the end, it doesn’t matter how exactly Shiro falls in love with Allura. He just does and it’s… Not a problem, exactly, but a consideration that lurks in the back of his thoughts. He doesn’t plan to do anything about it. They’re in the middle of a war. This isn’t the time for love. And even if it was, he is what he is and she is…. Beyond him.

Or: The one where mistakes were made and Shiro has to crash a wedding that shouldn't be happening in the first place.

Angst with happy ending, feelings, wedding crashing, emotional trauma is the real villain here

Duties of Heart - (1/1) - anglmukhii

They were both Jedi, but she was also a Queen. There were worlds of differences between them, yet they can only find peace and solace in each other. But between an Order that forbids it and her position that demands that if she marry, it must be for the good of her people: is there truly any hope for them?

AU - Star Wars Setting, break up, making up, angst, fluff, one fight scene, Jedi Shiro, Allura’s a Jedi too but she’s a queen as well, mentions of Keith, Shallura Secret Santa 2017

The Lost Kingdom (1/?) - littlewinterwonderland

"…in a single day and night of misfortune, the kingdom of Altea, perhaps the greatest civilization on earth, disappeared into the depths of the sea. It left behind only mystery, gloom and a boy with a heart made for the unknown"

Atlantis AU, Shiro is a nerd

Day to Day - (7/7) One-shot Collection - TKipani

Seven days when Shiro and Allura were a little more than paladin and princess. Series of drabbles/oneshots for Shallura Week 2016. These drabbles are sequential and connected.

Shallura Week 2016, sequential, the whole gang makes an appearance, drabbles and oneshots, connections, vague Klance if you squint

Lose It - (1/1) - viiisenya

Shiro is a decent enough hitman sometimes doubling as a thief, when the occasion (and payout) called for it. The last person he thinks would call for his services is influential businessman Alfor Altea of Voltron Inc., and what Shiro thought would be an easy job turned out to be a little more complicated thanks to one company heiress. He's usually the one that does the stealing but he didn't think he'd be the victim of a theft himself.

Hitman/thief AU, implied Klance, one-shot

We Were Young Once (We Are Young Again) - (1/1) - @andtheblueberrymuffin

They win.

In the aftermath, Shiro can’t quite wrap his mind around it. The war consumed every thought he had and every bit of his energy for so long that its sudden absence leaves behind a gaping hole. He expects to wake up, to find that Zarkon and Haggar are still out there and that the victory was just some cruel trick executed by his mind.

Or: The one where Shiro and Allura learn how to live outside of the war that's defined their lives for so long.

Slow burn, mutual pining, domestic fluff, post-war, recovery, some angst, arguing, emotional glowing

Throughout the Ages - (11/11) - MinnieTheMoocherDA

Shallura modern au where they've known each other since kindergarten. A collection of various one-shots depicting events in their lives as they grow up.

AU - Modern Setting, AU - High School, Keith and Shiro are adopted brothers, Allura and Lance are cousins

Fluff

Snooze Button - @alteanrituals (thesoulsikeep)

Mornings are the worst, especially after a battle.

Fluff, cuddling and snuggling, lazy mornings, established Shiro/Allura

Have a Magical Day - nayanroo ( @teslatricity)

The universe is mostly at peace again, and so it's time for its defenders to take a vacation. What better place to do that than Disney World?

Disney World & DisneyLand, established Shallura, minor background Klance, background Hunay, Allura doesn’t want any Mickey ears, she wants the right Mickey ears, and to kiss her boyfriend as much as possible

Compatible - thir13enth ( @ahumanintraining)

"I wonder what marks you would have, if you were Altean."

Fluff, exploration of a headcanon, beautiful beautiful fluff and cute humor

De-Stress - TKipani

Politics and battles are difficult, but Allura finds ways to de-stress. And Shiro is happy to help.

One-shot, battle sequences, fighting sequences, the couple that kicks ass together stays together, takes place sometime within season 4, ignores clone theory

Ice Deck - @ebonynightwriter

The Paladins awake to a chill in the Castleship – and a very different training deck.

Fun/Humor, ice skating, ship repairs, friendship, one-shot, canon universe, Shallura Month 2017

Just You and Me (Or Thank the Stars the Kids Aren’t Home) - thir13enth ( @ahumanintraining)

Domestic fluff, actual parents Shiro and Allura, ft. starrycove’s shallura children!

A Matter of Time - nayanroo ( @teslatricity)

The war's over, and the universe is starting to rebuild. As Allura leads the charge in forming new alliances, looking to the future, Shiro considers the kind of future he wants for them. But being a paladin means that your plans tend to go awry and your timing is never the greatest...

Shiro’s parents, engagement, Shiro is a bit of a disaster, he loves her so much y’all

“Shallura Fanfiction” - @clairelutra

Mutual pining/feelings, humor

Something Sparkly - @pensversusswords

“I’d love something sparkly,” Allura says.

Shiro is powerless when it comes to giving Allura what she wants.

First kiss, getting together, fluff, misunderstandings, Altean traditions

Contagion - @andtheblueberrymuffin

Based on my week, have some Shallura + paladins fluff wherein all the earthlings come down with the space flu and are not great patients.

Learn By Heart - @braincoins

It's Allura's first semester teaching, and she's prepared for anything ...except Takashi Shirogane.

Modern AU, Shallura Secret Santa 2017, College/University AU, hot for teacher, pining, fluff

Autumn Wishes - @juniperallura

For prompt "hold my hand/shooting star"

Shiro & Allura spend a day at the farm

Fluff, fluff without plot, Earth AU, Modern AU, fall vibes

Shiro and Allura Both Can’t Sleep - mckinlily

It is a generally held assumption that Shiro and Allura, both being unable to sleep, met up in the quiet of the night, and over the course pouring out their hearts to each other, fell in love. And while it is true neither Shiro nor Allura is very good at sleeping and they have met up at god-forsaken hours in the Castle, the heart-wrenching conversations are more a fiction than reality. This is due to the fact that—despite all attempts to appear otherwise—Shiro and Allura are actually both very young adults and just as susceptible terrible 2am ideas as anyone.

They do fall in love though. But it goes like this:

OR How Shiro and Allura got a lifetime ban from Hunk's kitchen and other fun stories.

Caught in the Act - @andtheblueberrymuffin

Established relationship, fic prompt, stuck in the elevator

Once Upon a December - RukiaG ( @rukia-g)

One-shots for Shallura Holiday Month. Some may be AU, some post-canon.

Shallura Holiday Month 2017, AU - bodyguard, Protect AU, AU - modern setting, AU - fairy tale, post-canon

Lost in Your Light - Cyan ( @vehicroids)

It hadn't been long at all since they found the blue lion, since they were all forced into an unknown part of the universe. Shiro struggled to sleep, thinking on it all. Thankfully, he wouldn't be alone that night.

Tooth-rotting fluff, fluff, traveling, post-canon, post-series, mutual pining, secret santa

Snow Angels - @bosstoaster (ChaoticReactions)

Advent Challenge, warm and fuzzy feelings, snow angels

Peace - @plumeriafairy14

Many decades in the future after team Voltron defeated the evil plagues of the Galra Empire, Allura sits in the palace gazebo with her husband, Shiro. They go through the photo albums they have collected over the years and Allura savors the intimate moment as the former Black Paladin holds her in his embrace while narrating the memory of each photograph.

Allura basks in his love and takes what she can; her time is running out, after all.

Future fic, Illness, bittersweet ending, Shiro and Allura as emperor and empress, minor Klance, reminiscing

The Aftermath - Rosey_Vasilia

After a particularly rough attempt to rescue a planet from Galra occupation, Shiro decides to try and help Allura stop blaming herself.

Background Klance, literally Shallura being soft, short fluffy one-shot, a mission goes wrong so Shiro comforts Allura

Basorexia - 13Vivacious13

It was ridiculous. Completely, utterly, inexplicably ridiculous. No one should want to kiss the back of someone's neck as much as she wanted to right now.

Movie night, space family time, fluff, pining

In a Snap - KatherineKatie ( @kittykattykatherine)

AU - Modern Setting, First dates, wingman, Keith means so well, snapchat, texting, light angst, flower shops, carnivals, humor, comedy, fluff

The Day Of - thir13enth ( @ahumanintraining)

in which Shiro tries to propose, but Allura is too confused to figure it out.

Definitely fluffy, marriage proposal, AU, Shiro’s parents

Artist’s Block - befuddle

Allura's suffering from artist's block, and Shiro just wants to help.

Artist and model AU, Modern AU

Sparkles - Meli_writes (@meli-writes)

Shiro wants to get out of the castle for a bit. When Allura agrees to go out with him he decides to get her something sparkly.

Space Mall, sparkly things, date, kisses, space dad, space mom, human vocab lesson, fluffy, cute, silly

Flight - littlespacestars (the shameless self-promo)

“Dad, I’m going to fly Blue!” A little girl speeds into the hangar with her arms out at her sides, triumphantly making a beeline towards the lions.

“Wait, wait, wait.” Shiro lifts his daughter away from the blue lion and props her on his hip, holding up a finger. “Just so we’re clear. I said Uncle Lance could fly Blue with you in his lap. This isn’t like you and me in Black.”

Lance strolls up behind them and leans against Blue, grinning from ear to ear.

“With a safety belt,” Shiro enunciates. “Lance.”

Tooth-rotting fluff, overprotective Space Dad, actual space parents, Uncle Klance, star babies, Shallura babies

Birthday - littlespacestars (the shameless self promo)

“Uh, Allura?” He doesn’t move an inch, only side glances at her and then back at the plump mouse standing upright on its hind legs. “There’s a giant—”

“Oh, don’t be alarmed, Shiro!” Allura sets aside her watering can and quickly scoops the stout mouse into her hands. She strokes the top of its head and gives it a fond smile. “This is just Platt, no need to worry.”

“Platt,” he repeats, still a little dumbfounded. “Okay, so it’s normal for you to have a yellow and green mouse. Noted.”

AU, minor angst, hurt/comfort, Shiro is human, Allura is still an alien, Shiro wants to celebrate her birthday, fluff, Shiro’s a dork, space mice, Shiro likes Lord of the Rings, Allura’s been stranded on Earth for six years now

Angst

Try Your Best (And Don’t Succeed) - mckinlily

Grief/mourning, Shiro has PTSD, Allura is a mess, Shiro is a mess, everyone is a mess but they’re trying the best they can, angst with a hopeful ending, set in season 2, gen or pre-slash, Allura-centric

Things Will Turn Out Fine - distinctive_pineapples (@obscure-sentimentalist)

“Would you mind telling me a story?” he asks, brushing a hand against the back of his head as if embarrassed by the request. “Maybe an Altean folktale, or something about your family. I… I’d just like to have something to remember you by.”

And oh, does that make her want to weep.

Future fic, Shallurangst, inspired by another show, angst with a happy ending, hopeful ending

Past and Future - @ebonynightwriter

During a Rebel training mission, Shiro and Allura are cut off from the group, and stranded on an unknown planet. Pushing to reunite with their team, they move forward, unaware of the dangerous forces around them…

Drama, tension, fighting, space battles, PTSD, psychological drama, mind control, mind games, developing relationship, feelings, one-shot, canon universe, season 4, Shallura Month 2017

S5 Shallurangst Drabbles - wordswithdragons ( @shiroallura)

this is a series of shallurangst drabbles posted to my tumblr over at shiroallura. do not all follow the same timeline, although many of them do fit together, the bottom three each individual takes of different possibilities set after s5. enjoy and maybe have tissues if you're weepy like me

Protect AU: I Have a Princess (and she has me) - killashilla

After a royal Altean gala is violently interrupted, Princess Allura and her bodyguard Shiro wait out the chaos alone while testing the boundaries of their strict roles in each others lives.

Shallura Protect AU, AU - bodyguard, AU - Real World, angst with feels, pining, mutual pining, blood and injury, undressing, forbidden love

I Miss You - SirFangirl

The princess who lost everything managed to lose something once more.

Angst, spoilers for season five, Allura knows a fake Shiro when she sees one but won’t admit it, the white lion knows what’s up, Shiro misses his friends and doesn’t deserve to suffer like this

Home (It’s in Her Hands) - palladioaigis

She's the light at the end of the tunnel, his everything, his home, and his love for her transcends time and space.

[[ Written for the Shallura zine Stars Aligned, Issue Two: Onwards.]]

Shallura Zine, Shiro needs therapy or a hug dammit, reunion

Stay With Me - nachseon

It’s not fair. It never is.

Angst, heavy angst, emotional hurt/comfort, mutual pining

Checkmate - rainingWolf

Shallura, Klance, drama, angst, action, romance, remix, VLD Fanfiction Remix 2017

Kintsukuroi - 13Vivacious13

Shiro is still coming to terms with the past. Allura notices and tries to help the best she can.

Emotional hurt/comfort, angst with a happy ending sorta, mentions of non-consensual body modifications, nothing too serious happens, I promise, mostly just reflecting on the past, established Allura/Shiro

Only Human - @bosstoaster (ChaoticReactions)

Collection of whump fics, tumblr prompt, leaning against walls to hide needing support, injury, hurt/comfort

Kuron/Clone Theory

Exchanges - thir13enth ( @ahumanintraining)

no returns, no refunds.

Clone theory, some angst

The Return of the Real Shiro - Meli_writes ( @meli-writes)

The real Shiro returns to the castle and finds a man with HIS face pretending to be HIM.

In his search to find a paladin he runs into Allura and he's so relieved because that last he heard from her she was screaming in pain.

Now, he has to explain that he is the real Shiro not that phony walking around the castle.

Shallura hugs, the real Shiro, Shiro returns, from wherever

Gravity - @braincoins

He looked at the clone. Monster, he thought. You didn’t mean to be, didn’t even want to be, but that’s what you are. He couldn’t help thinking that perhaps he and this clone had more in common after all.

Shallura Month 2017, angst, emotional hurt/comfort

Clone - littlespacestars (shameless self-promo)

Kuron is aware he’s a clone. He tries deciding whether or not to come clean to Allura about it, or let it surface on its own.

Shallurangst, One-sided attraction, Kuron wishes he were the real Shiro, angst

Like Real People Do - (5/5) - @andtheblueberrymuffin (Part 1 of Like Real People Do)

“Shiro knows this is wrong. Everything is wrong. But they need him. Keith said so, and Shiro knows, he knows, that if they need him he has to help them. It’s what he would do. It’s what he does. (Everything is fine.)

Or: The one where something is very wrong with Shiro after his second escape from the Galra.”

Tragedy, Post-Season/Series 03, Speculation about Shiro post season 3, ‘Shiro’, Implied/Referenced mind control, mind control aftermath & recovery, clone Shiro, prepare your tissues and cry deeply

Survivor's Rites (3/3) - (Part 2 of Like Real People Do) - @andtheblueberrymuffin

The Paladins have suffered losses before, but nothing quite like the one they're dealing with now. It's difficult to find the time to grieve when dealing with betrayals and Lotor's continued attacks. None of them are well-equipped to move on, in any case.

Or: the sequel to 'Like Real People Do.' Now with more misery.

Past character death, grief/mourning, post season 3, lion swapping, angst

Heartlines (8/8) - (Part 3 of Like Real People Do) - @andtheblueberrymuffin

After months of searching, Shiro has finally found his way back to the Castle of Lions, but nothing is quite how he remembers it. Everyone looks at him like they're seeing a ghost, for one thing....

Or: the conclusion to the 'Like Real People Do' series, where the fallout from the Galra Empire's experiments with human cloning nearly destroys everything the team has worked so hard to build. Takes place directly after the end of 'Survivor's Rites.'

Angst, emotional hurt/comfort, normal hurt/comfort in later chapters, clones, lion swapping, trauma, grief/mourning, plot, slow build, post season 3, implied/referenced underage drinking, original character death(s), attempted sexual assault, DOES NOT GET FAR

NSFW

Unconventional Piloting Methods - Pixie_rings ( @materassassino)

Flying a giant robot lion while having sex isn't the best idea.

Unsafe flight practices, do not attempt at home, vaginal sex, vaginal fingering, higher than the mile high club

Make You Feel Pure - sublimation ( @667-darkavenue)

“After all he’d been through, it couldn’t be clearer that universal forces had bent themselves backwards to pull him into the orbit of someone who cared for him, who trusted him, and who needed his care and trust just as much...”

Pool sex, breast play, outercourse, oral sex, praise kink, attention kink, praise kink, body worship, existential crisis midsex, stumbling upon all the embarrassing kinks you’re into midsex, sex with your girlfriend so good it opens your third eye, soft dom Allura

Playlist - befuddle

“If there’s anyone to blame for cockblocking, blame your shitty taste in music!”

Domestic AU where Shiro tries to get his groove on, and Allura just isn't having it.

Sex in public, car sex, fluff

Infomercials - befuddle

“We need it! We can’t keep replacing my bedframe at the crack of a new quintant to avoid suspicion. This will solve all our problems!”

Not graphic, suggestive content, humor, Shiro and Allura keep breaking the bedframe, this is the Shallura discord’s fault, the Shallura discord’s legacy, shitpost

Incandescent - CalicoTomcat

Shiro and Allura share an intimate evening and morning together, savoring a peaceful moment on the Castle of Lions.

Established relationship, oral sex, vaginal sex, genital piercing, fluffy and adorkable

Belong To You Alone - sublimation ( @667-darkavenue)

“Smile back, ask questions about him, go along with his suggestions. You’ve seen me do it.”

He thought it over. “Isn’t that… We have to leave in a day, with or without the army.”

“Oh, Shiro.” Allura smiled. “He’s not trying to ask for your hand, he just thinks you’re nice to look at. It’s harmless.”

“Well. I’ll give it a shot.”

When Shiro gave something a shot, he didn’t hold back.

Space politics, throwing Shiro under the bus as sexy leverage, blow jobs, frustration, jealousy, smut w/ plot, attention kink, praise kink, misunderstanding & miscommunication

Dirty Talk, Dirty Thoughts - Meli_writes ( @meli-writes)

Allura has always wondered what The Paladins meant when they shouted things like: "Fuck you!" or "Suck my dick!" in the middle of a fight against Zarkon's army. One night she asks Shiro what it all means and he tries his best to explain. ;)

Funny, sexy, dirty talk, dirty thoughts, angst, smut, embarrassed Shiro, flirty Allura, sexy Shiro

Alien Anatomy Altean - FeyduBois

Shiro and Allura's first time does not go as planned due to differences in biology.

Alien sex, alien biology, anal fingering, crack, smut

Une Petite Mort Thermique - pixie_rings ( @materassassino)

The one sexual taboo Altea had, and she is about to break it.

Anal sex, alien biology, kink meme

Just So I Can Feel Something - @smolsarcasticraspberry

Sometimes you can't sleep and the only thing that helps is fucking your co-worker in the break room cos you haven't been kissed in 10,000 years.

OR: that time after Crystal Venom when Shiro and Allura hooked up on the sofas and tried to act like it didn't mean anything.

"Allura took a sip of her tea, hoping the hot steam would hide her blush, and leaned over to put her mug down on the coffee table. Her body shifted with the movement, and her hand drew away from Shiro's. To her surprise, his fingers tightened around her own. As if he didn't want to let go.

She glanced down at his hand where it gripped hers, and then up at his face.

"Sorry," he said. "I just… I haven't been touched in a long time. It's nice.""

Smut, fluff, flut, porn with feelings, post Crystal Venom, canon compliant

Reunited - bittergoldilocks

Before Shiro disappeared they had been at the beginning of a tentative relationship which had amounted to stolen kisses, secret meetings, hushed affections, and one adventurous encounter in a supply closet. When “Shiro”- the clone- had “returned”, Allura thought it was over. Not only did the meetings stop, eventually even the kind words did too. She had been devastated. And Shiro seemed to somehow understand this now.

Reunion sex, praise kink, crying, slight angst, Real Shiro, love confessions

Relinquish - @braincoins

The Coalition's newest allies are annoying and picky and Allura's on the verge of losing her cool with them. Shiro steps in to give her a night away from responsibility and decision-making.

softdom!Shiro, oral sex, fingering, how to be sweet and loving while also fucking someone senseless, and also still be goofy dorks

She Still Pulls on Me - nayanroo ( @teslatricity)

some nights, shiro can't sleep. on those nights, allura sets aside her crown.

Mention of nightmares, throne sex, shallura exchange

To the New Morning - babyfairy ( @babyfairybaekhyun)

Morning showers are often Shiro’s favorite kind of showers.

PWP, smut, shower sex, fluff

Relaxing - head_and_heart

Shiro has an idea of how to help Allura relax after a long mission

Porn without plot, oral sex, vaginal fingering, sex, no excuse for this just smutty smut

Silk and Tongue - Meli_writes ( @meli-writes)

“I have something in mind that I think you’ll enjoy, want to try it?,” he asked her again. She was flushed and her pink body marks glowed a little brighter from her arousal.

“What did you have in mind because I kind of like it here,” she said while she rocked her hips to grind against him.

He smirked and brought his hands to rest on her hips. “I like you there too, but I was thinking you might like doing that against my mouth,” he said.

Allura’s hips stopped, but Shiro noticed her breath quicken in excitement.

Pure smut, silk robes, hungry licks, porn without plot, Allura tries something new, shameless smut

Galaxies Collide - @smolsarcasticraspberry

Shiro and Allura take a joyride in the Black Lion. IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

Mind Link AU, flut, smut, some plot, dom Shiro, not super dom, but like a lil bit, soft dom Shiro, they’re gonna bang in the Black lion okay, it was inevitable

Please support these lovely writers and give them some kudos and a comment! I actually discovered a lot of fics I haven’t gotten around to fully reading yet, so I need to go back and do the same! Thanks for the lovely fics, guys! <3

#shallura fic rec #shallura #fic recs #shiro #allura #takashi shirogane #princess allura #vld #voltron #I would put a READ MORE thing on this but when I do it screws up the text??#fml #idek guys #i'M SORRY

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