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#this is so insane of me but I genuinely get so upset when I ask people to hang out and they just don’t reply
guysonroblox · 1 day
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i hate tycoons so much now nobody does it for the love of the game anymore its all "buy my super insane mega billion upgrader (permanent!!!!) for 400 robux that we spawn under you after like every purchase" like they think im ever playing their game again in order to use the permanent part. i hate all the shit they put on the sides of your screen too like the uncloseable robux shops that are only there so that kids playing on mobile accidentally buy them when they try to move or jump. it just makes me sad
state of the game is basically the worst its ever been, genuinely think gamepasses were a mistake. it's just depressing how it seems like every game's either pushing really hard to squeeze as much money as they can from you, whether that's in the form of the super aggressive pushing like you described, or by adding microtransactions to games that, genuinely do not need them.
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you can buy a quarter million jailbreak dollars for like, all your obc robux for a month. (or about 24 dollars). worst trade ive ever seen. it's not like jailbreak money's hard to come by. of course, most people wouldn't buy it, but you don't really need 'most people' to, in a system like this. just get one guy whaling for jailbreak and you're getting mad money for like 0 effort. it's really kind of upsetting.
i don't think a game should ask you for money inside the game, in general. let me unlock the stuff you're hiding behind [200 robux] by just grinding out for like hours, if you're gonna have stuff locked. do some more mewtwo shit to me, save me the money.
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roobylavender · 1 year
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one thought before i disappear again but i really fail to understand damian fans' logic or interaction with canon on any level like your entire engagement with him as a character relies on a bastardization of every person around him. i don't see what worth there is in comparing how dick and bruce are comparatively written as parental figures in damian's life when your primary basis for analysis is canon from a writer who believes (1) dick shouldn't be in a relationship with kory bc he's happy-go-lucky and hates drama; and (2) bruce's life as a hero naturally culminates in fascism. neither of these are good faith takes on the characters involved so how can you place any value in how either of them are portrayed to interact with damian by way of that. and obv this doesn't even get into the plethora of talia issues which i have essayed about to the point of exhaustion. like idk i get that i can't make people hate a character obv lol and for many damian fans that attachment is there bc they read about him when they were young but i still don't really understand what there is about damian to be invested in once you're an adult who realizes he is holistically built on character assassination and racist stereotypes that he is inseparable from. like you can't really analyze his interactions with anyone without the context for those interactions being shoddy writing of someone else and i know that can happen in comics a lot but it happening in isolation is different from it forming the entire basis for a character
#to be deleted#like idk the parental comparisons wrt damian make my eye twitch. you are arguing about bastardizations this is USELESS..#the fact that people genuinely believe bruce being written as an abusive asshole who would tell his child to his face that he doesn't like#him or treat him like an alienable object bc he didn't raise him himself and was turned into an animalistic assassination is just#so deeply insane to me like i get people don't like bruce sometimes it upsets me sure but the reasons are there but this just#feels so extreme bc it's literally built on the most egregious bastardization of bruce ever that refuses to even#acknowledge how deeply he loves and wants to help children not to mention how excited he was when talia was pregnant#and to be honest. to be HONEST. new teen titans dick would not have been able to stand damian at all#they do have some of that snark and dick is clearly annoyed with him when he has to take damian under his wing but like#it's ridiculously tame compared to how new teen titans dick would have reacted to someone so loath to team work#dick went to bruce's house when jason died and asked point blank why bruce put an incompetent kid out in the field#he's severely poor when it comes to tact and i'm not saying developing a relationship with damian would have been impossible but#it would have taken time and it would have taken time bc of DICK needing to adjust. not the other way around#dick is good at being a leader and taking charge when all the parts of a machine work in synchrony#what he's not good at is being faced with deviations from expectations esp when they cross the line with his morals#idk i know this is starting to sound like a bruce apologist dick hate post but it's really not i promise i just#i feel like people deliberately misunderstand their demeanors and expectations ESP in context of how they're written with damian#and bc when they're written with damian is at a time in dc comics where their respective character trajectories are practically#opposite to what they were twenty years ago rather than feeling like any kind of natural progression
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our-lady-of-mcr · 29 days
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#anyways im still mad today but its not lingering in my head like it was yesterday#thank fucking god for that lmfao#the more i think about it the more i realize that theres really no reason to be that upset bc yeah it sucks to lose#someone so close to me like that but......she was not afraid to give me red flags even when we were in a good place#and tbh this felt like a huge neon sign screaming get out while you can#and if the other girls we were friends with want nothing to do with me after this i honestly really do not care#i didnt see them often anyways and the one is basically still a teenager who drove me nuts 95% of the time#and the other 2 dont get into drama at all so i doubt they feel any type of way about me considering neither of them are that kind of person#im more annoyed that she did this right before we had plans for one of the girls birthdays and i have a feeling thats not happening anymore#i keep wanting to ask if were still doing anything but i would actually rather die than see b so..........no thank you#even if they do say anything ive already made other plans for tomorrow so......oh well#i feel so much less insane when everyone says i didnt do anything and its scaring me that i keep thinking back to the time era she accused#me of saying shit during and im like ???? i dont remember saying that. did i say that?? did i say you shouldnt have had your kid and i just#dont remember??? did i say we hang out to escape him and i just dont remember???? and all i can think of is false memories and a situation#where someone else said those things to me in that same time period. anyways i dont know why anyone would remember that specific of wording#if it wasnt to just be used as ammo later. but i genuinely dont remember saying any of that shit esp not that recently?????#and b is ungodly great at gaslighting and she also takes shit at face value and doesnt seek further info if shes not doing okay#so im just.....yeah im taking this as my sign#and to eliza from february.....bitch did i say any of that because i do not fucking remember it#self
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eff-plays · 9 months
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The way Astarion reacts depending on how you compliment him in the mirror scene (I have no interest in insulting him so I won't be covering that here, have fun though!) drives me fucking insane.
"I want to know what the world sees when it looks at me. What you see."
And you get two types of responses. First, your choices for compliments are
Strong, piercing eyes.
The creases when you laugh.
Pick the first, and he's pleased. "Go on," he says, sounding very seductive. You're giving him exactly what he wants, and he's encouraging it.
Pick the second, and he gets upset. He's an eternally young vampire, not your doting grandmother! You can do better than that. Even if you meant it as a compliment (I know my Tav definitely did), he doesn't seem to take it that way.
Your second options are
That dangerous smile.
The way your hair curls around your ears.
Once again, the first one pleases him, and he even praises your efforts. Very good. Now finish the scene and tell him he's beautiful.
But if you say the second, he gets exasperated. This is meant to be flattery, not poetry. Just tell him he's beautiful and we can call it a day, he says with a dismissive wave of his hand. He doesn't need to hear this crap, just tell him what he wants and fuck off.
Of course, it doesn't matter how you get to this point, and every dialogue option at the end of the scene nets you the same amount of approval. If you call him beautiful, it's +1. Call someone else beautiful, it's +1. If you ask whether he just wants shallow praise (aka don't call him beautiful), you get +1. So this is me pulling this out of my ass I guess.
I always choose to call him beautiful becuase 1) he is and 2) my Tav thinks so too and would oblige him if he asked for it that directly.
But I am obsessed with the different routes you can take to get to this point and what they imply.
Strong, piercing eyes and dangerous smile pleases him more outwardly, but doesn't actually affect the outcome. He's satisfied and confident with these compliments. They confirm what he's trying to project into the world, what he aspires to have and to be.
The creases when he laughs? The hair curling around his ears? Those are things he can't control, can't use against someone else. But he asked to be seen, and if this is what Tav sees, then what does that mean for him?
Why are they complimenting his laugh lines? Why are they speaking poetry at him? Why are they seeing things he has no control over, and why are they revealing them to him?
He doesn't want shallow praise. Questioning this nets approval, and giving it to him doesn't increase approval. What he wants is assurance that what he's trying to be is what the world sees, that he's in control.
And if you actually act as a mirror, point out the things unique to him that you see, he gets uncomfortable, because you're showing a reflection of someone he thinks he's not, of someone he has no control over. And that's scary, even if it's supposedly complimentary.
Because what's scarier than losing control?
But then, compared to how genuinely upset he seems when you insult him (I looked these up on YT for context), the laugh lines and hair curls are still accepted as compliments. So what does he think when Tav says these things?
They see past his piercing eyes and dangerous smile. They see something else that they like even more, things he's not aware of or doesn't appreciate as much. What does that feel like, to cultivate such a perfect image of oneself for the purposes of seducing and tricking others, and then be stumped when someone walks past all that and points out something entirely different that they noticed and found endearing?
Do you do him a favor, and tell him you see only what he wants to be? Or do you speak the truth, and show him what he actually is? Which one is better? Which one is worse?
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allgodsvillage · 2 years
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sprytesukii · 2 months
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you know me (better than i know myself)
bakugou katsuki x reader
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katsuki is hopelessly in love with his best friend until you waltz into his life and warp it beyond his recognition.
rating: mature, 18+, MDNI
wc : 10.4k (holy fuck)
tags : mild to heavy angst, fluff, eventual smut, hurt/comfort, gn!reader (they/them pronouns), afab!reader, unrequited love (not between reader and kats), depictions of mild depression, genderfluid!denki, queer!katsuki, reader has a quirk, oral (reader receiving), p-in-v intercourse, unprotected intercourse (wrap it b4 u tap it pls!), soft katsuki, and they were roommates :0, Not Beta Read, i think that’s it T^T
an: this is the first thing i’ve genuinely written in over a year and jesus it was like i was possessed writing it LMFAO incredibly self indulgent and i had a lot of fun writing it! i hope you guys enjoy it (pls rb n leave feedback pls pls pls)
read on ao3
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the warm light of the coffee table lamp casts a beautiful shadow across the planes of eijirou’s face — his sharp, angular nose, smooth cheekbones, plush lips that form a sheepish smile — and katsuki can’t even appreciate it, not with the absolute bullshit that pours from his best friend’s lips.
“the fuck you mean, you’re moving out?”
the words come out a lot harsher than katsuki intends, but he can’t even bring himself to feel guilty, not even when kiri’s face screws up in clear disappointment.
“well, uh, i told you, this new place is closer to my agency so it makes more sense. the commute’ll be much shorter and, uh…” he trails off then, a pretty pink blush spreading across his nose, highlighting the small spattering of freckles that katsuki is certain he’s the only one who’s ever noticed, a broiling heat setting alight in his stomach.
he feels like he might die.
“and.. kaito finally asked me to move in with him.”
there it is. fuckin’ kaito.
katsuki is far from an idiot — people call him a lot of names (brash, inconsiderate, a righteous asshole), but never dumb. they couldn’t unless they were outright lying.
part of what makes katsuki so intelligent is his observance.
of course he’s noticed eijirou’s late nights, his suspicious absences at group get togethers, the sweet smiles he makes as he taps at his phone screen, the fucking hickies.
bakugou katsuki is not stupid. he’s incredibly observant. especially when it comes to the massive crush he’s been harboring on his best friend for the last three years.
he’s not entirely sure when his reluctant tolerance of the bright redhead shifted to something more but he knows he’s been viciously, painfully pining over him day in and day out in the weeks (months, years) since.
and it’s not like kirishima hasn’t had partners before. he’s nearly impossible to resist with his intense attentiveness, his willingness to go above and beyond for those close to him, not to mention his insane physique, built from long hours out on the field and in the gym.
it’s no wonder katsuki has been in love with him for as long as he has been — eijirou is perfect.
perfectly imperfect, of course. he gets upset when katsuki sorts his clothes for him (“i’m an adult, okay? it makes me feel like you’re parenting me, man.”) or when he lectures him on his diet, or when he shuts him out after being friends for so long (when his feelings become too much to handle), but eijirou’s the only one who’s stayed.
katsuki has tried flings and a few more serious relationships but those have ended quickly because he’s just too much.
too loud. too frustrating. too closed off. too him.
but not for eijirou. never for eijirou.
that’s why when kiri mentioned he was talking to this new guy, he brushed it off. it would be like all the others who would eventually break it off because of the long hours at work or eijirou’s boundless enthusiasm and katsuki would be there to pick the sopping wet, heartbroken kiri off the ground and put him back together. they didn’t deserve him anyway.
but this kaito? apparently katsuki’s eagerness to ignore eijirou’s flings made him blind to what was happening — eiji wasn’t his anymore.
he’s moving out.
he’ll be gone forever.
subconsciously, katsuki realizes he’s been silent for far too long and that eijirou’s face has lost the hurt and is now painted with concern and confusion.
fuck, even now, he’s concerned. he cares so so much, except in the way katsuki craves.
“uh,” kirishima’s gentle voice breaks him from his thoughts, a big hand finding its way to katsuki’s knee, “are you okay dude?”
the touch sears through the expensive black joggers katsuki is wearing and he flinches so hard, he jostles the coffee table to his side. he barely sees kirishima’s brows furrow as he launches himself to standing, the telltale burn behind his eyes signaling the incoming wave of tears.
he can’t see katsuki like this, he fucking can’t.
katsuki marches to the kitchen, opening up the fridge and blankly staring into it while he tries to will the water back into his face and still the turmoil burning in his chest.
it feels like he’s aflame, like he’s suffocating, drowning.
he can hear kirishima’s steps behind him but thankfully stopping a reasonable distance away as he calls his name again, desperation coloring the word.
fuck.
with everything he has in him, katsuki grabs a random bottle from the refrigerator (a smoothie eijirou made for him with far too much kale and too little milk and a little note attached with his name and a smiley face. he’s gonna be sick.) and turns to face him, a strained, shaky grimace painting his lips.
“that’s-“ his voice cracks hard and he desperately clears his throat, blinking hard when he sees eijirou reach out for him and stop. “that’s fuckin’— that’s great. ‘m happy for you.”
the words feel like glass inching their way out of his throat and while he knows he sounds anything but, the words seem to do the trick, kirishima’s face lighting up like a fucking christmas tree.
“that means so much to me, man!” this time, he doesn’t stop himself from wrapping katsuki up in a hug, the full body contact sending a wracking shiver through his body. “and don’t worry! we’ll still hang out all the time and i’ll — yes! — finally be able to introduce you to kaito — you’re gonna love him, and-“
katsuki has to tune him out, if just to keep a hold on his sanity because otherwise, he’s gonna break.
he keeps it together through the rest of the conversation about kaito, tuning in only to give time appropriate grunts and hums while pretending like his entire world isn’t imploding in on itself.
he keeps it together, miraculously, as kirishima packs up his things, the evidence of their entwined lives for the past five years disappearing into cardboard boxes over the span of a few weeks.
he even keeps it together when he meets kaito on the move out date, even if it’s just barely. kaito is handsome — tall, taller than katsuki, with windswept brown hair, bright brown eyes and a dimple in his left cheek. if he wasn’t so fucking in love with eiji, he wouldn’t mind taking a piece out of him, but as it were, the sight of kaito makes him genuinely sick to his stomach.
it’s even worse that kaito is so nice. his quirk is even nicer — some nature type that makes it impossible for plants to die when touched by him. they turn to him like he’s the fucking sun and eiji does too.
by the time all kirishima’s stuff is packed up in the back of kaito’s truck, bile is burning at the back of katsuki’s throat as he says his final goodbye to kiri in the way of a bone crushing hug that doesn’t last as long as he wishes, as he craves.
kiri sends him a blinding smile as he climbs into the passenger seat of the truck, looking all too at home against the worn blue leather seats.
it’s now when katsuki wishes he was a little less observant because the hand kaito gently places on kirishima’s thigh and the subsequent full body blush makes him sick.
he waits on the curb the appropriate amount of time as the pair drive away before racing back into his building, up the stairs, into his unit and straight to the bathroom, kneeling over the toilet and heaving, chills wracking his body despite the sweat on his brow.
nothing comes out (praise whoever above because katsuki hates vomiting) and he slumps against the porcelain, resting his heated skin against the toilet seat.
he thought… fuck, katsuki has no idea what he thought, but he didn’t expect it to hurt this bad. he feels a little like he’s dying and lot like he’ll never be okay again. that kirishima walked out with his heart and all he’ll be for the rest of his life is a walking husk of a human being.
a wave of nausea overtakes him again and he debates leaning back over the toilet, but exhaustion overwhelms him and he falls asleep against the wall of his bathroom, sweaty, sick, and heartbroken.
(the next morning, he wakes up to a pounding headache and two texts from eijirou.
he drinks a shit ton of water first and pops an advil before opening the messages.
EIJI (18:21) : just got to kaito’s! dude it’s so nice i can’t believe ill be living here now ><
katsuki has to take a deep breath to fight against the wave of pain that hits him right in the gut, but he keeps reading, the second text simultaneously warming him and twisting the knife.
EIJI (18:25) : i’m gonna miss you so much kats T^T so weird living without you
he stares at the message until his vision swims before liking the second message and turning off his phone, tossing it onto the couch and trudging to his bedroom, slamming the door behind him.)
the next few weeks prove to be incredibly difficult.
a new case is brought to best jeanist’s desk and as the best sidekick at the agency, he’s placed in charge of heading the search and capture of an elusive invisibility quirk villain.
the days are long and exhausting, and more often than not, he doesn’t even have time to miss kirishima or notice his things missing from the apartment — he gets home, makes a barebones meal and collapses on the couch for what feels like a four hour nap until he has to turn back around and do it all over again.
it’s sustainable until it isn’t.
a few too many missed meals and restless hours of sleep has him passing out in a morning briefing, prompting best jeanist to send him home for a mandatory two week “vacation.”
it’s a prison sentence, is what it is.
at home, there’s nothing to distract him from the utter lack of kirishima, from the idea that the one person who has seen all of him and loved him anyway has left.
most days it’s too much to bear, so instead, he sleeps.
the usual tidiness of his space slowly deteriorates as he wastes away, waking only to scarf down whatever is left in his refrigerator before going right back to bed.
his friends text him often — hanta, denki, even fuckin’ hitoshi — but he ignores them all. the texts from kirishima are the hardest to delete, all concerned words and pleas for them to just talk, but he does it anyway.
it’s better this way, he tells himself. this way, no one else is dragged down by his self pity.
izuku ends up being the one to break the streak on day nine of radio silence.
a knock resounds at his door and he ignores it, pulling his blankets high above his mussed blonde hair, effectively hiding him from view as he hopes whoever is there spontaneously combusts or, better yet, just leaves.
when the knocks stop, he believes the latter has just occurred and he sighs in relief, completely missing the sound of metal creaking and his doorknob falling to the ground.
he’s debating on taking another melatonin to find the sweet release of sleep once more when his bedroom door opens up and he startles, launching up out of bed, hands and quirk at the ready to destroy the intruder, but he’s slow, too slow.
izuku is on him in a moment, pinning him to the bed and disregarding his gnashing teeth and cursing to look him over with a detached gaze.
“katsuki,” he says, voice firm in effectively shutting him up, despite the way he wriggles for freedom (so ineffectively, it’s embarrassing), “you look like dogshit.”
a harsh bark of laughter escapes katsuki’s throat and even from his angle where he’s pressed into his pillows, he sees izuku’s expression soften.
“you’ve lost your tact, deku,” he responds, his words gravelly from disuse. izuku scoffs but lets him up, taking a step over a pile of clothes on the ground to lean against the desk opposite of the bed.
with his newfound freedom, katsuki sits up, absentmindedly rubbing his now sore shoulder, the pain oddly grounding. izuku watches the motion with the intense focus he’s carried throughout his entire life, though he’s a far cry from the boy who used to break his bones and cry over injured birds.
now, he’s built like a brick house, forest green curls tapered into a flattering modern undercut, the fat from his cheeks transforming into something more chiseled and adult. his eyes aren’t as soft either — they’re tired and, as he looks at katsuki’s form, tinged with worry.
“where have you been? no one has heard from you in a week.”
katsuki rolls his eyes, looking away from the gaze that pins him, the gaze he tried so hard to get to look at him without fear. there isn’t a hint of fear in them now, but katsuki is afraid there’ll be disappointment and that’s almost worse.
“none of your fuckin’ business,” he grunts out and he immediately knows it was the wrong response. besides eijirou, izuku knows him the best and after all they’ve been through, he doesn’t deserve this.
he never deserved any of it.
with that thought spinning around in his head, katsuki rubs a hand over his face with a quiet curse, leaning back against the headboard.
“fuck, i’m sorry,” it comes out as a mutter, but its effect on izuku is instantaneous. the previous hardness of his expression melts and he moves closer, his bushy brows furrowing together. katsuki can barely look at him but he does anyway, he makes himself. izuku deserves that much (he deserves so much more but one day at a time).
“we’re just worried about you,” izuku says quietly but without pity. never pity. “what’s going on?”
maybe it’s the way izuku’s freckled face reminds him far too much of eijirou’s own spattering of constellations or maybe it’s the fact katsuki hasn’t eaten in over fifteen hours, but he shatters in that moment, crystal tears filling up carmine eyes.
if izuku is startled at katsuki’s sudden change of emotions, he doesn’t show it, instead moving to envelop katsuki in his arms, allowing him to bury his face in the crook of his shoulder and let go.
katsuki tells him everything and by the end of it, his head feels like it’s stuffed with cotton and his eyes are puffy and red, but he feels better than he did all week.
izuku just looks thoughtful from his place sitting near the end of katsuki’s bed, the pair parting somewhere in between katsuki’s admission of throwing up when seeing kaito and kirishima together and his accidental confession of stealing one of eijirou’s hoodies from one of the boxes (it sits right under his pillow, but izuku doesn’t need to know that).
“i’m really sorry, katsuki. that fucking sucks,” izuku ends up saying and katsuki’s initial reaction is anger. he spills his heart and guts out to izuku and all he gets is that sucks? but when he opens his mouth to give deku a piece of his mind, he realizes that it does suck. it sucks royal ass and there’s nothing he or izuku can do to fix it - at least not yet - but the acknowledgment, without any attempt to give advice or make everything better, does wonders for katsuki.
he pushes out a watery laugh, his lip ticking up into a smile - for the first time in weeks - and izuku lights up a little. “yeah. it really fuckin’ does.”
the smile izuku sends back is blinding and for the one thousandth time, katsuki is reminded why the symbol of peace is just that.
they talk for a little while longer before izuku forces katsuki into the shower. he takes a long time, letting the scalding hot water turn cold before he emerges to find that his childhood best friend has started cleaning up the mess that has become of his apartment.
katsuki watches on for a moment until izuku raises an eyebrow at him and offers him a trash bag which he takes wordlessly, a wave of affection crashing over him so quickly tears come to his eyes. he blinks them away but he doesn’t miss the knowing smile izuku sends his way.
the pair work together in relative silence until the apartment is spotless and katsuki’s stomach is grumbling something fierce. izuku makes his way to the fridge but is met with nothing but a half carton of eggs and a rotting smoothie in the far corner, a sticky note attached to the lid. he fixes katsuki with a small, sad smile before digging through his drawers for a takeout menu.
when the food arrives, katsuki finishes it in record time and he can’t tell if it’s the fact they remembered to make it extra spicy or if it’s because he literally can’t remember the last time he had an actual meal, but it’s the best thing he’s eaten in a long time.
after they finish, izuku turns on the television and they both spend the evening shit talking a d-list hero film until they fall asleep on the couch, bodies slumped against one another, holding each other up.
that night seems to have knocked something loose in katsuki because the next morning, he wakes with his first alarm and heads to the gym for the first time since his mandatory vacation. by the end of it, his arms are burning from quirk overuse and he’s completely wiped, but he feels more like himself than he has in ages.
he finally texts his friends back (barring one) and they greet him back with high levels of enthusiasm and concern. it feels good to be received back into the fold with the love he’d thought he’d lost, his cheeks hurting with how much he’s smiling as the messages roll in.
katsuki finishes out his sentence and goes back to work on the fourteenth day with an earnest apology to best jeanist and a new lead on the villain after pouring over the case files in between hyperintensive workouts at the gym. best jeanist is quietly impressed, but the squeeze to the shoulder he gives katsuki tells him he was more worried about him than he let on.
the next few weeks pass in a blur, but this time it’s more pleasant. he watches shitty movies with izuku, deletes instagram when he sees a photo of kaito and kirishima on holiday in america, starts attending a pottery class on the weekends he has off with mina and denki, continues to ignore the texts from eijirou that are becoming more and more infrequent as time goes on, smokes with hanta and shinsou one evening and laughs harder than he ever has, and life feels like it’s slowly gaining its footing once again.
he realizes three months after kirishima had moved out that he should probably start looking for a new roommate or downgrade to something more reasonable. he seriously considers the latter, but when he looks at the space he cultivated right after he graduated from ua, he realizes he can’t quite give the place up.
he posts an ad on craigslist that night.
the next time the group goes drinking (kirishima is suspiciously absent, despite his reentry into the country a few days prior — mina mentioned it), katsuki brings up his roommate problem and denki latches on, his cheeks pleasantly flushed from the wine he’s been sipping on.
“oh, oh! i know - i know the perrrrfeeccttt roommate for you,” he slurs, toying with the earring dangling from his ear and fixing his excited gaze on katsuki’s face. “they’re like.. the besttt, dude, you’d - you’d love them.”
the words are vague, but when katsuki opens up his mouth to ask for more details, denki’s eyes widen and he rushes off to the bathroom, a hand over his mouth, nearly tripping over the his platform shoes and maxi skirt.
the topic of the roommate is quickly forgotten then, but it resurfaces a few days later at pottery class.
katsuki is glaring holes into the side of his slightly lopsided vase on the pottery wheel, internally going through the steps to see where he went wrong. denki to the left of him laughs and chatters as he makes his, frankly, hideous ceramic, the clay warped beyond recognition.
something in his one-sided conversation brings his attention to katsuki who’s startled at the sound of his name coming from denki’s mouth.
“yo, you still looking for a roommate?” he asks, tilting his head as a strand of hair falls from the lengthening ponytail at the back of his head. without alcohol in his system, denki looks a little more hesitant to be approaching this topic, but does so when he isn’t met with a howitzer to the face.
the group doesn’t know much of anything, just that kirishima and katsuki aren’t talking, so they tend to tread lightly around the subject. katsuki appreciates it, genuinely, but he’s not going to shatter at the sound of eijirou’s name - not anymore. it hurts still, of course, but the pain has dulled to a steady hum that he can ignore if he tries hard enough.
“yeah,” he grunts, turning his eyes back at his vase. “why? you got someone in mind?”
denki grins, showing off the lightning tooth gems on his canine. “hell yeah! i’ll give you their number — they teach the watercolor class here on tuesdays and they’re so cool.”
he speaks about you with obvious adoration and katsuki belatedly wonders if the two of you are dating, but doesn’t voice this curiousity, instead wordlessly handing denki his phone to put in your contact as “ROOMIE” with what feels like a hundred paint emojis after it. katsuki smiles at his friend’s antics and can’t quite bring himself to change it.
the colorful contact remains untouched for about another week until he gets a rent notice and remembers the little paint palettes in his phone.
in the middle of his morning workout, he taps out a quick text to you, before tossing his phone to the side and promptly forgetting about it.
katsuki [09:27] : Hey. I’m Bakugou. Denki gave me your number. I’m looking for a roommate. You interested?
ROOMIE [10:16] : oh hey yeah i’m interested
ROOMIE [10:17] : do you want 2 meet td
ROOMIE [10:17] : i’m at the cafe on 5th n cherry
ROOMIE [10:17] : in the back
ROOMIE [10:19] : i’ll b here 4 a while
ROOMIE [10:19] : just come whenever
katsuki only sees the message at the end of his workout a half hour later. the number of messages in a row and less than ideal grammar makes him turn up his nose but he quickly taps out an affirmative, before dapping izuku up and heading to the showers.
he makes it to the cafe twenty minutes later, scanning the place to see what he assumes is you tucked away in the back corner, your table full with books, papers, paints, your laptop and at least four empty cups of coffee.
katsuki raises an eyebrow at the sight but walks over anyway, telling himself he’s doing denki a favor by meeting someone he thinks so highly of so he won’t feel too bad when he tells him it’s not going to work out.
you don’t look up when he stops at your table, too occupied with the piece of art in front of you, your face twisted up in intense concentration.
you’re quite pretty, he notes subconsciously, the hard set of your eyes and one track focus reminding him an awful lot of himself when he’s swept into a difficult case. your complete unawareness gives him more time to take you in, though, so he can’t even bring himself to be too annoyed.
you’re wearing a bright yellow chargebolt hoodie that clashes terribly with your garishly pink acid queen baggy sweatpants. a pair of cellophane socks cover your feet where they’re stretched out in the seat across from you and your shoes (made to look like the red ones from deku’s costume, jesus christ) sit haphazardly beneath the table, empty.
it’s such a bizarre sight, katsuki almost laughs — almost — but he doesn’t, instead opting to knock your feet off the chair opposite you so he can sit down.
“a big fan of heroes, huh?” he asks, the action coupled with his words startling you so bad, your knees hit the underside of the table, threatening to upend all the precariously balanced objects decorating the surface.
you look angry at first before you realize who it is and once you do, you just look relieved. it’s an unusual reaction, one katsuki rarely gets from anyone who isn’t actively in danger, especially strangers.
“you scared the absolute shit out of me,” you say tiredly, rubbing a hand over your face and sighing. katsuki watches you recognize your own impoliteness in real time, a sheepish smile spreading across your lips.
pretty.
“fuck, sorry,” you extend a paint splotched hand to him and he takes it, shaking it firmly before it falls back to his side, fingers tingling. “i get super into shit and completely forget where i am. kami gets onto me about it all the time. says i’m prime villain bait or some shit. i think he’s saying it most of the time to freak me out, but he might actually be right. don’t ever tell him i said that though.”
katsuki can’t help but stare at you as you ramble at him with the familiarity of someone who’s known him for months, not just a few minutes. it’s uncomfortable in a strangely nice way and he can feel his muscles loosen as the nerves melt away.
“aw fuck, i’m sorry again. i didn’t introduce myself.”
you give him your name, offering your hand out for him to shake once more which he does with an amused look painting his expression. you don’t seem to notice, your attention being grabbed by the piece in front of you again.
“i’m bakugou,” he offers after a moment of silence. you don’t even look up when you respond.
“i know. you sent me that text, remember? also you’re like, super fucking famous, dynamight,” you look up at him through your lashes, teasing, and heat unexpectedly blooms on the back of his neck.
what the fuck?
in a bid to gain back control of the conversation (and himself) katsuki asks, “what’re you workin’ on? dunceface said you’re a painter or some shit.”
your nose crinkles at the moniker, but you don’t say anything about it, instead turning the sketchbook around for katsuki to look at it.
the piece is stunning, but it’s visceral and he can’t help but lean back a little when looking at it, stomach dropping.
a deer lays on the ground, gutted, blood, guts and viscera pouring out of its abdomen as a figure just out of frame reaches inside and pulls out its heart.
katsuki is disgusted but intrigued and that feeling only amplifies when you press a finger to the painting and activate your quirk.
suddenly, the hand in the painting moves so realistically he flinches — he can hear the deer’s heart beat, can hear the way the blood trickles through the blades of grass, can smell the coppery tang and can feel the rush of spring wind blowing past his face.
it’s like he’s there, in the piece, and he feels both a little sick and also so alive.
“holy fuck,” he whispers, shivering, and you laugh, deactivating your quirk, bringing him back to the real world. the sounds of the cafe flood in, replacing the smell of blood and spring fields with coffee and loose tea leaves. he shakes his head, eyes a little blown when they look at you.
your expression is playfully amused as you bring your sketchbook closer to your person, resting your head on the palm of your hand.
“sorry,” you offer, but you don’t sound very sorry at all, “should’ve asked before i used my quirk on you. not everyone likes that shit.”
the words are so nonchalant but you look like you’re poised to watch him get up and leave, never looking back. katsuki doesn’t think he could leave if he tried.
“nah,” his voice feels raw so he tries to clear it but the feeling doesn’t go away. “you’re good. just surprised me, ‘s all.”
your mouth parts in muted surprise and you tilt your head, appraising him like you’re seeing him for the first time. katsuki feels surprisingly bare as you study him, but he doesn’t drop his eye contact, despite the heavy pounding of his heart from your intensity.
the pair of you sit in silence like that for a moment or two longer before you break it, asking him if he wants something to drink. before he can tell you he doesn’t drink coffee though, you flag down the waiter, ask for a hot cup of tea (“darjeeling or oolong,” you ask the waiter, not even sparing katsuki another glance, “he doesn’t look like he fucks with green tea.” it’s true. he doesn’t. his heart does a stutter step in his chest.) and when it arrives to the table, katsuki asks you to move in with him.
you agree.
the move in process is so quick and easy that when it’s done, it feels like you’ve been living there for years.
your belongings integrate seamlessly into his own. your books about art history and watercolor technique find their way onto his bookshelves filled with classic japanese literature and hero history.
(he comes home one day to see you propped up on the couch with a thick book on the origin of quirks and heroism in japan that you stole borrowed from his collection. he just cocks his head at you when you meet his gaze and you shrug.
“i’m not japanese, i don’t know any of this shit,” you say in way of an explanation. “besides, this is important to you. i wanna learn.”
you turn back to your book like you didn’t just completely shake the foundation of katsuki’s world for a moment and he stumbles off to the kitchen, heat burning at the tips of his ears.)
your plants find their way on every windowsill and while, once upon a time, it would’ve made him think of kaito and that sick, curling jealousy would wrap around his chest and squeeze, now? it just makes him think of you.
(it helps you can’t really keep them alive so nearly every other week the two of you are replanting something new in the pots and vases katsuki makes in pottery class.)
your favorite foods join his in the refrigerator and the two of you take your meals together more often than not. katsuki cooks and you clean, either eating on the couch while watching a documentary or at the dining room table as you talk and talk and talk.
(the first time katsuki misses dinner, you wait up for him, even forgoing your own meal to eat with him when he returns at 2 in the morning.
“don’t do that shit again,” he grumbles when he finds out what you’ve done, his scarlet eyes piercing your own. you shrug, unafraid, tired eyes trailing lazily over his tank top clad form.
“don’t tell me what to do,” you retort after a moment, a mischievous smile tugging at the corners of your lips, “i like eating with you.”
your honesty, unabashed and loud, always bowls him over and he has to take a sip of his ice water to feel steady again.)
the relationship between the two of you is easy, for once, and katsuki finds himself looking forward to coming home, to you and your witty comments, sharp intelligence, and your uncanny ability to see right through him.
he swears it must be a hidden quirk, the way you seem to just know — know what he wants and needs without even asking and your accuracy rate is pretty much unbeatable.
after a particularly bad mission where the property damage is unusually high and the civilian casualties match, the leading hero news journalist puts out a scathing piece about him, sending him into an emotional spiral.
you find him that afternoon, curled up in bed, staring at the window blankly. you crawl up in bed beside him and you don’t speak, don’t offer him coddling words of “everything’s gonna be okay,” or “you did the best you could,” because if that was katuski’s best, he doesn’t fucking deserve to be a hero. not at all.
but no, you don’t offer him empty words of placation. instead, you brush a lock of his hair off of his forehead and look at him with that all-seeing gaze, your expression neither soft nor hard, but understanding.
“you’re not gonna let that shit happen again, right?” you ask, tilting your head. katsuki shakes his head vehemently, the mere notion of the same amount of dead bodies on his watch sending a fire through his chest as he sits up.
“fuck no.”
“good. now come here, i painted something new and i need to see if i get ‘good job’ or ‘holy fuck that’s shitty’ eyebrows from you.”
and that’s that.
you’ve even given him a nickname and it inexplicably makes his skin feel tight, like he needs to tear it off and show you, like it’s a display of how you make him feel.
it’s a lazy sunday afternoon, one he’s required to take off by best jeanist, and he’s spent it next to you on the couch, listening to a few of your records while you paint a forest scene, a skittish doe front and center with rivulets of water streaming from beneath it.
occasionally, you’ll activate your quirk and katsuki can suddenly hear birds chirping and the creak of the wood before he’s back in your cramped flat, the sounds of city sounding below.
it’s jarring and yet, comforting, both your presence and the quirk, in a way that still doesn’t make sense to him yet.
“bambi, are you even listening to me?” the term of what he assumes is endearment startles him out of his thoughts and he eyes dart to yours, an amused expression on your your brow.
“who the fuck are you callin’ bambi?” in his shock, he can hardly conjure up the ability to sound pissed, confusion instead hijacking his words, making them come out soft and gruff.
“you, idiot,” you reply, like it makes all the sense in the world. “you’re like a deer to me. something in you is skittish, afraid and yet, you’re still so beautiful.”
what the fuck.
katsuki’s breath completely evaporates from his lungs and he feels like he’s going to pass out at your frank words. it doesn’t help that you don’t break eye contact or look embarrassed to have said something so, so… intimate.
he can’t even begin to parse through how to respond to something like that, but you know that too, flicking a little bit of paint water at him with the tip of your brush. he sees the olive branch for what it is and he grabs it with both hands, the annoyed sound rising from his throat on autopilot as you laugh, but your eyes are still so knowing.
he thinks about that day everyday after with sickening butterflies flapping around in his stomach and those only magnify when you choose to call him the new nickname every single chance you get.
katsuki would not dream of stopping you.
it’s about two months into you moving in with him and he’s going out drinking with the squad. he’s invited you about thirty times but every time you decline, citing that you’re behind on grading art projects and that show you were looking forward to is airing tonight.
(you’re a substitute art teacher at the local elementary school, a fact that genuinely shocked katsuki when he found out.
you’d laughed, wide and unapologetic at his reaction.
“i know i’ve got quite the potty mouth but i clean it up for the kids,” you say, eyes twinkling. “they kinda love me, i think, but it might just be the bob ross videos i put on for them every friday.”)
katsuki chooses not to push but he knows that he’ll end up cutting the night short, just so he can sprawl next to you on the couch and watch you paint.
you seem to know it too (how?? secret quirk, it must be) if the knowing look you give him isn’t enough as he goes to change.
when he returns to the living room, he’s clad in a nice black button down that’s unbuttoned enough to show off the strong planes of his chest and his thin gold chain, and a pair of black jeans that fit him and his tiny waist incredibly well.
katsuki knows he looks good in this outfit, but he finds himself uncharacteristically nervous as he stands in front of you, your eyes dragging down his body as slow as molasses, igniting the skin as though it was a physical touch.
your eyes meet his once again, molten and hot, and katsuki’s knees nearly buckle at the sight. he’s never seen you look like that - not at him, not at anyone, and he finds that he quite likes to be the center of your attention in this way.
“you clean up nicely, bambi,” you murmur, your voice a lower timber in comparison to your normal speech.
the blush spreads immediately to all visible parts of his body and he can fucking see you holding back a grin. “fuck off,” is all he can say before he spins on his heel, grabs his keys, and marches out the door.
it takes everything in him to continue walking, out and up to the train station and then to the bar, because all he wants to do is turn right back around, back to your home and back to that lava-like gaze you pinned him with earlier.
it’s you that’s racing around in his mind when he pushes the door open to the bar, but all thoughts come to a complete, grinding halt when he sees kirishima at their usual table, surrounded by all their friends and grinning like he’d never left.
he looks different - after all, it’s been about a year since katsuki had seen him last. his hair is longer and his roots are grown out, his skin has taken on such a warm glow and it, impossibly, seems like he’s gotten even bigger somehow.
it’s also impossible to miss the black band on his ring finger signaling a new engagement ring which he figures is what they’re meant to be celebrating tonight, eyes belatedly catching on the comically tiny “i’m engaged!” sash hanging around his chest.
the sight of kirishima sends the most heinous bolt of anxiety through katsuki and now he really just wants to call you to come get him and take him home, to make him forget all about his unrequited love. he moves backwards to do just that, but he’s already been spotted by kirishima himself.
fuck.
katsuki is frozen as kirishima’s happy expression falters when he meets his eyes, cycling through shock, disbelief, stark hurt and then utter relief.
he can see the way kiri’s mouth forms “katsuki” from a distance as he puts down his drink and moves towards him, his feet completely frozen until they’re standing face to face (face to chest, really) for the first time in months.
“hey,” kirishima says, hesitantly, breathlessly, as his hands flutter uselessly at his sides, like he wants to just pick katsuki up but is stopping himself. “can we, uh, can we go outside and talk?”
katsuki just nods because what else is supposed to do? and as they move out, he catches the worried gazes of their friends watching the pair of them from the table. denki and izuku, the latter of whom knows the most (everything) and the former who managed to figure most of it out on his own.
(“takes one to know one,” he’d said, bitterly when he’d confronted katsuki a few weeks ago about his unexplained mandatory leave all those months ago. katsuki was confused until kaminari flipped around his phone to reveal a photo of him and hanta pressed tightly together in an embrace that was strictly platonic and yet, horribly intimate.
katsuki’s lips drew together into a tight line as he settled against the brick wall kami was leaning against, trying to light the cigarette hanging loosely from his lips.
“you’re too good for plain face,” he says after a moment, attempting to channel his inner you, blunt and honest. “you’re gonna find someone better.” and just like all his thoughts as of recently, they’d flitted right back to you.
denki had watched his face carefully, cigarette unlit, a thoughtful look crossing his own expression.
“yeah,” he concedes, “i will, won’t i?”)
katsuki gives the pair of them a nod, holding up a hand to izuku who looks like he wants to follow them out of the bar, despite the pounding in his chest and the way he suddenly feels unsteady on his feet as they leave the building to step right back out into the cool, fall air.
kirishima’s stance is awkward and since neither of them smoke, they both just stand there, barely looking at each other and waiting for the other person to speak up first.
“fuckin’ hell- what’d you wanna talk about kirishima?” katsuki grits out, tired of the waiting game and suddenly, immediately, so exhausted. all he wants to do is be curled up beside you, with your all seeing eyes and gentle utterances of “bambi” in his ear.
the tact he’d lost in his haste to get this over with stings kirishima whose brows furrow in annoyance. “what do i want to talk about? i haven’t seen you in a year, bakugou, not since i moved out and you completely cut me off with no explanation whatsoever. i want to know why. what - what did i do wrong?”
his voice breaks on the last word and it sounds so sad, so uncharacteristically eijirou, that katsuki flinches, finally looking over at kirishima to see a broken, pleading man who lost his best friend for nothing more than silly, stupid feelings.
at once, katsuki feels all the fucking idiot asshole he is and it’s staggering how much that thought makes him feel like shit. he could’ve reached out, he could’ve, but he was so worried that he wouldn’t have been able to keep it together, spending time with kiri, and as time passed, the issue became that so much time had passed and he had no idea how to navigate this all over again.
he runs a hand over his face, leaning against the brick facade of the bar. “fuck,” he whispers, gravel crunching underfoot as kiri steps closer.
“i - i miss you, kats,” kiri’s voice comes out quiet and thick, “i got engaged and all i wanted to do was call you, but you weren’t there, you weren’t speaking to me and i-“ he takes a shuddering breath and katsuki’s eyes fill with tears.
“i was in love with you.”
the sounds of the street fade out as katsuki finally turns to look at kirishima, the tears falling down his cheeks.
“wha- bakugou, what?”
“i was in love with you and i couldn’t fuckin’ - i couldn’t do it. not to myself, not to you.”
kirishima face is drawn, pale and mouth gaping. his mouth closes, then opens again, then snaps shut, his head shaking in disbelief.
“why didn’t you - fuck - why didn’t you ever say anything, man?”
katsuki scoffs, the sound wet with grief. “are you shittin’ me? why the hell would i do that?”
kiri shrugs, long, dark lashes sweeping his cheekbones, leaving tiny wet marks. a year ago, the sight would’ve filled katsuki with rabid butterflies, but now it remains just an observation, one made passively and without thinking.
“i should’ve told you somethin’, i fuckin’ know that now, but i was - i was scared. scared of you hating me, scared of losing you. but i went and fucked that one up anyway, so,” katsuki laughs, self deprecating, and kirishima shakes his head vehemently, grabbing him by the shoulder and pulling him into a tight hug.
katsuki’s throat is tight as he gives into the embrace, burying his face into kirishima’s shoulder.
“you haven’t lost me, kats, and you never will,” kirishima whispers, pulling apart far enough to press his forehead to katsuki’s, red eyes meeting red. “i mean, who else is gonna be my best man?”
katsuki’s eyes widen and he takes a step back. “don’t fuck with me.”
kirishima shakes his head, a wet laugh escaping his lips. “not fucking with you bro. you’re my best friend. i want you there beside me on the happiest day of my life.”
after everything, after the year of no contact and the absolutely shitty way katsuki treated him, kirishima still wants katsuki by his side?
he’s honored, he’s out of his depth, he’s fucking nauseous, and he really wants to go home and tell you.
“i met someone,” he blurts and kirishima looks startled at the change of subject, but takes it in stride, a smile tugging at his face.
“that’s so great, dude, congrats! what’s their name?”
katsuki breathes it out and when he does, he realizes something, the force of it hitting him like a steel beam to the head.
“i think i’m in love with them.”
kirishima blinks, taking in katsuki’s tense form. he looks like he’s about to run away.
“i’m so happy for you, kats. really, i am,” kiri says, before being taken off guard yet again by the hug katsuki initiates.
“of course i’ll be your best man, shitty hair. i fuckin’ missed you too,” he murmurs and he hears kirishima sniffle. “i gotta go but text me and we’ll get lunch tomorrow or some shit, okay? i’ve got a lot to catch up on.”
he pulls away to see eijirou’s big wet eyes stare down at him with unabashed care and love, and katsuki feels his heart swell.
he got his best friend back and now it’s time to get you.
kirishima agrees to the meetup wholeheartedly and lets katsuki go with a hearty pat on the back and a shouted “good luck!” over the sound of the rain that started up during the last moments of conversation before going back inside the bar.
katsuki considers blasting his way to you, but he knows the optics would be incredibly unfavorable and his pr department would have his head, so he races to the train station instead and hops aboard, his mind racing with thoughts of you.
his hair is plastered to his forehead with rain by the time he gets to his apartment building and the button up is molded to his body like a second skin. he’s uncomfortable, of course, but he hardly pays it any mind because before he knows it, he’s unlocking and pushing open the door to your shared flat.
he’s home.
you startle from your place upside down on the couch, your paints and sketchbook cluttering the coffee table at the side while the tv plays an ancient looking cooking show quietly.
katsuki is bowled over by the sight, the weight of what he now knows as love sending him stumbling a little on his feet. he has to hold onto the doorjamb to keep his footing.
you sit up, observing, and you tilt your head. “you’re back early,” you comment, curiosity lacing your words.
he nods, not trusting his voice as finally steps past the threshold, kicking off his shoes and putting on a pair of hideous hawks themed slippers that you’d bought for him on your own birthday.
you hum thoughtfully before standing and disappearing down the hallway, katsuki’s eyes glued to you as you go. he can hear the sounds of you rummaging around in the bathroom, his feet frozen to the floor when you return, a fluffy towel in hand.
“you should shower, of course,” you say with a grin, opening up the towel and draping it over his head to dry it before moving on to the rest of his sopping body. “but i figured i’d keep you from dripping all over that ugly rug you’re obsessed with.”
katsuki doesn’t respond, can’t, and you don’t push or question, instead diligently wiping him down until he’s marginally more dry, eg, not actively dripping on the hardwood.
you move to go dispose of the towel and katsuki’s hand shoots out, not of his own volition, to hold you in place. it’s here he notices how close you’ve been standing to him, your breath wafting over his collarbones.
“bambi?” you question, unafraid of him, just lightly confused, but you don’t move away from him, somehow picking up his need for closeness without him saying anything, and he snaps.
“i love you,” he whispers, the explosion in his chest coming out in just those three gruff words, his carmine eyes boring into your own with an intensity you match.
a small smile spreads over your lips and your eyes light up, joy thrumming over your skin. “i love you too, katsuki.”
it’s perfect and katsuki can’t stop himself from cupping your face and pressing your lips together.
the kiss is gentle and chaste, your hands dropping the towel, coming up to rest on his forearms and holding him in place as you move your lips softly against his own.
katsuki feels like the rest of the world could implode right now, could be on fire or flooding or being overrun by villains and none of it would matter, not a single fucking thing because you’re in his arms and you’re kissing him back and you love him.
these thoughts ignite a hunger in him, a flame stoking in his belly, and he pushes further into the kiss, his hands sliding from their place on your face. one cups the back of your neck while the other slides down your back, pressing you firmly against the front of his body.
he’s almost giddy, having you like this, and he’s sure you can feel it because you’re smiling into the kiss like this is the happiest day of your life.
he thinks it’s his.
you continue trading kisses like this in your foyer, but it only escalates when your tongue flickers across katsuki’s bottom lip and you sigh softly, back arching against him.
katsuki has to break apart from you so he doesn’t consume you in that moment, but you don’t go far (you never do), your foreheads pressed together while you breathe in each others air.
“fuckin’ hell,” he chokes out and you laugh. “can i please - fuck - i need you.”
his honesty shuts you up quick and you nod, biting your lip. “take me to bed, bambi.”
and that he does.
katsuki’s hand finds yours and he pulls you towards his bedroom — you’ve been in there countless times, to watch movies, to nap, to read with one another, but of course, it was never like this.
the tension is thick but it’s not uncomfortable at all. you walk over to his bed and plop down on it like you’ve been in this situation a thousand times. the action soothes any residual anxiety katsuki might’ve had as he walks over to you, your heated gaze tracking his movements the entire time.
“take this shit off,” he grumbles, tugging at the garish all might crewneck covering your abdomen and you swat his hand away with an amused look.
he can feel his pout forming at your smile, but you just shake your head. “don’t tell me what to do, bambi,” but still, you raise grip the bottom of the thick fabric, lifting it up and over your head before letting it drop to the ground, leaving you bare.
or almost bare, if not for the objectively hideous, brightly colored, thin, cheap and lacey dynamight themed underwear covering your body.
“what the fuck is this?” katsuki doesn’t mean for his question to come out so reverent, but seeing you clad in his colors sends a bolt of heat down his spine so strong, he’s quite literally never been harder in his life.
you don’t seem to notice (but you always do), tilting your head at him with a grin playing on your lips. “they were on sale. didn’t think you’d ever see them.”
katsuki’s brows furrow at that, his hands tightening from their place on your hips. “who the fuck else was going to?”
you shake your head, like there’s something he isn’t getting. “no one. it’s always been you.”
“fuckin’-“ katsuki surges for you, claiming your lips with his with an urgency that had previously been lost. you respond in kind and this time, you’re letting out all these quiet gasps and sighs, writhing beneath him. he has to see you fall apart.
he reluctantly detaches his face from yours, kissing down your neck and sucking marks into the thin skin there, one of your hands sliding up to tangle into his hair, keeping him close.
a moan escapes him at the feeling of your fingers on his scalp, nearly getting lost in the mindless action, but he has to keep going. he makes it to your chest, laving his tongue over one of your nipples, flicking the hardened bud with the tip.
“f-fuck, bambi,” you outright moan and katsuki has to grind down against the mattress, his free hand sliding to pinch and pull at your other nipple.
your body can’t figure out whether to arch towards or away from his ministrations, which katsuki takes special delight in. you’re always so in control of yourself, even when you’re not, so it’s beyond rewarding to be responsible for your destruction.
“bambi - fuck - ‘suki, fuck me,” you groan and katsuki’s eyes roll back before he pulls off your nipple with a pop, his lips red and slick.
“nah.”
“nah?” you parrot, leaning up on your elbows with the closest thing he’s seen to annoyance directed at him written all over your face.
“nah. ‘m gonna make you come first.” katsuki grins, feral, and you shudder.
“get to it then, hero.” the moniker, while meant to be sarcastic and biting, just makes katsuki moan, hooking his fingers in the waistband of your (dynamight !!) underwear and tossing them to the floor.
he leans in, propping up one of your legs over his shoulder to bury his nose in the crease between hip and thigh, inhaling deeply. you smell sharp and tangy and so you that he couldn’t stop himself from taking a lick, entrance to clit, if he tried.
you sigh at that first touch of his wet muscle, melting in the bed while one hand remains buried in his hair and the other splays above your head. you watch him move with that intense look and you don’t look away so he doesn’t either.
he doesn’t look away as he slurps loudly at your entrance, tasting the wetness that’s gathered there with a pleased hum. doesn’t look away as he swirls his tongue around your clit, pulling a sharp gasp from your chest. doesn’t look away as he picks up pace, swirling, flicking and sucking until you’re chanting his name and “bambi,” your body tensing up as you buck your hips up into his face. doesn’t look away when you cum hard, soaking his lips and chin to which he eagerly groans, slurping up all you have to offer.
you pull him up to stop him from licking you through your aftershocks, kissing him hard once he gets to eye level.
“please,” you beg, eyes wide and urgent. who is he to deny you or himself?
katsuki stands and shucks off his boxers in record time, wrapping a hand around his cock that’s hard and leaking, the tip bright red.
your eyes eat him up hungrily, lingering on the way his precum spills over his knuckles with every slow stroke.
“i’m gonna suck your pretty cock tomorrow, preferably before breakfast,” you comment breathlessly. katsuki has to wrap his fingers around the base of his cock to keep himself from coming in that moment, taking a deep breath and glaring at you when you giggle.
“condom?” you shake your head, leaning back and spreading your legs to show off the wet mess he’s made of you.
“‘m clean and i’m in love with you. fuck me. now.” you can’t even sound commanding, not with the whine lying beneath your words, giving away how bad you want him. how bad you want this.
if the way katsuki’s cock legitimately jumped at your words is anything to go by, he obviously feels the same.
“goddamit, can’t fuckin’ say shit like that to me, jesus,” he rambles, crawling back onto the bed and notching the fat head of his dick into your entrance before leaning down to kiss you, open mouthed and messy.
he pushes into you when your tongue is halfway down his throat and he nearly chokes on it. you’re so soft and wet and velvety — he’s gonna cum so fucking fast, holy shit.
of course, you know it too, know him like the back of your hand because you squeeze even tighter around him and slide your hand down between your bodies to rub frantically at your clit.
“you - oh, god, you feel so fucking good bambi, fucking me so well, always taking care of me,” your words slur together as your eyes roll back, his hips slamming into yours at a quick pace.
he wants you to cum first, wants it more than anything, but the dirty talk coupled with the way you feel clenching around him has him shooting off faster than he expected, a low, long whine leaving him.
his hips stutter against yours and fireworks go off behind his eyelids. it feels like he’s coming forever as he humps into you and that feeling is only prolonged by you coming around him, your cunt clenching so tightly, you force him out, his spend spreading all over your mons and pelvis with a choked groan.
after another long moment, he slumps against you, exhausted and happier than he’s ever been.
you hum contentedly, wrapping your arm around him to pull him half on top of you, your body succumbing to the tiredness that’s so quickly overtaken you.
“i love you, katsuki,” you whisper, the phrase thick with sleep and emotion. katsuki feels burning at the backs of his eyes so he buries his face in the crook of your neck to hide, kissing your shoulder when the words don’t come.
you know, though. you always do.
“fuck, bambi, we’re gonna be late!” you screech from your (now) shared room, the sound muffled from where your head is buried in the closet.
by the door, katsuki is trying (and failing) to tie his bow tie, the red fabric remaining uncooperative in his hands. he groans in frustration, raising a hand to run it through his hair but stopping short when he remembers how you painstakingly fixed it for him a few hours ago.
“i know! it’s this stupid fuckin’ tie!” he shouts back, staring at himself in the little mirror you purchased, smiling a little despite himself when he remembers that trip to the home decor store with you, picking out new items that represent the both of you for your apartment.
speak of the devil, you step up behind him, looking gorgeous in a red, floor length dress, wrapping your arms around his waist.
“you look really good bambi,” you grin, fingers dragging down his abdomen to rest on his waistband, but his hands stop your downward motion while he gives you a halfhearted glare through the reflection.
“don’t start that shit,” katsuki turns around in your hold to face you, your hands immediately finding his undone tie. you work efficiently, face so scrunched up and focused that katsuki can only lift your face to press a kiss to your lips.
you melt, kissing him back easily and when you pull away, his lips are tinged with your lip products, marked by you. “you have a little something…” you trail off, wiping it away, not realizing how he stares at you like you’re the sun and he has no other choice but to revolve around you.
“marry me,” katsuki blurts, heat burning at the tips of his ears after a moment of you looking at him in utter disbelief.
he worries for a split second that you’re going to say no, but then your face splits into the most blinding smile he’s ever seen.
“are you proposing to me right now, bakugou katsuki?” you tease, fingers toying with the tie around his neck.
he nods, his hands finding your waist as he pulls you closer to him. “so what if i am?”
you laugh and nod, tears filling your lash line as the lighthearted facade drops to reveal you, earnest and honest and so so in love with him.
katsuki has no idea how he got so lucky, what he did in a past life to have you in his life and agreeing to be with him, in his life forever.
“of fucking course, i’ll marry you,” you say, grabbing his face and kissing him hard. “and i want nothing more than to make love to you on our brand new ikea sofa, but if we’re late to kiri’s wedding, he’s gonna kill me and make you watch.”
even the empty threat you make through your happy tears centers you in katsuki’s life, like you know that you are the center of his world, of his entire universe. you always know, know him better than he knows himself and there isn’t anyone on this whole earth who he’d rather be with than you.
he doesn’t tell you any of this though, blinking back tears instead and agreeing with a laugh, before finally ushering the pair of you out the door.
the thing is, katsuki doesn’t have to tell you.
you already know.
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soobnny · 5 months
Text
loving is terrifying — han jisung. best friends to lovers. accidental confessions (1.6k words)
in the midst of ranting, han jisung accidentally confesses he’s in love with you
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“And if I burn the whole school down, would you bail me out of jail, Hanji?”
You’re still only a few sentences into the important speech you were asked to write, and you’re starting to feel agitated, chewed up pencil carving out your thoughts on paper before finding its way abandoned on your desk.
It’s been a few hours, and you’d chosen to put the pencil down lest you want to bring yourself to insanity.
Pretty lies usually come easy to you, but now they’re burning holes into your skull and flicking the ashes into your brain. In the reprieve, all you can think about is your anger for the authority.
“Bold of you to assume I won’t be your accomplice.” Jisung retorts from where he’s seated next to you on the floor, arms crossed behind his head as he leans against his couch.
“There’s just so much wrong in the system. Their code of rules deprive students of their creativity. Only the top students have a multitude of opportunities waiting for them. And don’t get me started on how the authorities put so little value into culture and societal issues. Everything is wrong, just wrong in all ways!”
There’s a word count in Jisung’s head on how many times you’ve said wrong in one sitting, but he’s looking at you with a hint of something in his eyes. Almost adoration.
“And we can change it by burning the school down?” A tone of amusement is laced in your best friend’s voice, though you fail to search for a trace of judgment.
“We can start there. Then the world.” You take the pencil back and fiddle with it between your fingers.
“The world? That’s very ambitious of you.”
You glare at him.
“I didn’t say I wouldn’t be by your side. I like ambitious.” Jisung smiles at you, making sure to lock his eyes with yours so you can see heavy genuineness where his pupils are. “What’s the next step then?”
“Climate change.”
Jisung throws his head back in quiet laughter, and the slight movement allows you a whip of his laundry detergent from the white shirt he’s wearing. “Okay, climate change.”
“You’re making fun of me.”
“I’m not!” His lips quirk up into a smile, eyes morphing from crescents to a full moon as he struggles to defend his name. There is still laughter even in the way he licks the inside of his cheek and takes your hands in his.
You fail to copy his laughter.
“Your eyes are upset. Are they directed at me?” Jisung softens his voice, only speaking one his laughter has boiled down. He pulls you closer than you already are, and you don’t notice the way he grabs the pencil between your fingers in the process to set it down.
“Of course not.” You mumble. “I’m mad at everything else, at everything wrong.”
A tally adds to his word count.
You sigh when you let go of his hands to take the paper in your own, eyes leaden as they scan across the sentences you had bullshited earlier. “I don’t know how I’m supposed to write this.”
“Just scream it out.”
“What?”
“Scream out what you actually want to say.” He grins.
You gape at him.
“I’m not screaming in your living room. Your neighbors are going to think someone’s being murdered.”
“Then just say it. Whatever you want to say. Everything wrong.”
“I don’t know where to start.”
“Okay, I’ll start then.” He smiles, and it’s heart-warmingly encouraging. “I wish it was easier to ground myself. I live in my head most of the time, and opening up is hard, and I wish forming any form of relationship wasn’t so scary.”
“Ji—“
“Okay, now your turn.”
“We are not going to ignore what you just said.”
“I said, your turn.”
“Jisung.”
“Please?” He places a hand over yours, and it’s enough for your brain to short circuit.
“Alright, fine. But we are going to talk about it later.”
“Now, what about those things that are wrong?” Jisung asks, giving your hand a gentle squeeze before letting go.
“Well, uh— our poor education system, that’s for one. And, the government. Blatant sexism too, how stupid the patriarchy is, how I still can’t parallel park for the life of me.”
You start with sporadic things, the ones that instantly pop in your head when you think about things that make you upset, and as you continue to talk, you dig a little deeper, and you don’t even realize you’ve stood up and your hands are flailing around like a salesman by the second.
“And, don’t even get me started on the transportation system. It’s so dumb how car-centered design came to be because how is it that the people who have access to private vehicles also have the easiest routes over the less fortunate who walk or commute? Like, why do we have to adjust to the roads?”
There’s a long list of things you want to say, finally letting loose and narrating all the things you’ve kept locked away in the back of your mind because you’re with the one person you can trust. When you meet Jisung’s gaze, he’s looking at you in awe.
“I hate how we’re branded as prodigies when we were younger. I hate the expectations that come with it, that we have to be great all the time, and, oh, this actually feels really good.”
Jisung chuckles at the way you come to a sudden realization, but he’s always known you were wiser beyond your years. “You’re brilliant.”
“Well, you have to say something too!”
Jisung fiddles with his fingers, trying to think of where to start. Though, the brilliance that is you and the opportunity of having this moment with you is enough motivation for him to follow suit.
“Uh, it’s so scary how superficial people are nowadays, and how so quickly they’re let down. It stresses me out how a single mistake could cost you so many relationships, but at the same time, who will stress out if not me? And it makes me realize how lucky I am to have the people in my life, and having an opportunity to talk like this really fuels my positivity in life, and it makes me realize even more how much I strongly feel like my life is for you guys, and there is nothing more important to me than being able to be a good person for you guys, like you. I wish I could be the bestest friend for you, maybe even more than that, but fuck, loving is so scary so I wish you’ll never find out how I’m so so in love with you— wait.”
The room falls silent and he’s thinking of a thousand different ways to die on the spot. He’s embarrassed. This is embarrassing, and he’s thinking it really wouldn’t be too late to jump off the bedroom window and hope for the best. A thousand different ways, maybe pretend he never said anything, stand still and maybe you’d think he wasn’t there in the first place. A thousand different ways.
“Han Jisung.”
“Soooo, haha, where were we in your speech again?”
Jisung doesn’t meet your eyes for the fear of rejection. He doesn’t think he has the heart to handle it right now, especially not after his accidental confession.
“Did you mean what you said?”
“About how superficial people are? Of course, it’s so scary. Hey, did I tell you about the tim—“
“Is being in love with me something wrong?”
He falls silent, and you can visibly see him start to panic, and his hands are pressed together as if in a prayer as he’s shaking his head profusely. “No, oh god no, it’s not. Honestly, it’s one of the only things I’m sure of, and that says a lot because I’m not sure of anything. I’m not even sure I’m in the right course or the right school or if I’m spending my money the right way, or if I’m even gonna live tomorrow, but fuck, loving you and everything about you is something I will never question.”
You can feel yourself start to smile, and Jisung finds himself copying you. It’s one of the first things he knew he loved about you—your smile, and the way you think, and the sound of your laughter. Despite his erratic heart beating and his fear of this exact moment, he still finds himself smiling when you do.
“I’m in love with you too.”
“What?”
You can visibly see the gears in his head turn, and he’s writing a story he doesn’t know the ending to just yet, but the beginning is so beautiful because it’s with you. Then, he laughs. It’s breathy, and you can almost hear the relief. “Did you just say you love me?”
“I did.”
“Oh my god. Oh my god.”
“I’m in love with you, Han Jisung.”
“I’m going to die.”
You laugh, and then he snaps back into reality.
“Can I kiss you?” His tone is so careful, but there’s a hint of something you can only recognize as a slight desperation—like he’s been thinking of it a while.
Jisung reaches out to wrap his arms around your waist, albeit a little shy. It’s a pattern that’s already so familiar. He isn’t a stranger to hugging you, in fact, he’s done it a million times, but the connotations to this one is a little different, and he can’t think straight at the possibility that you might actually consent to letting him kiss you.
“Okay.”
Words that haven’t left being translated into the motion of his lips moving against yours. Honestly, he doesn’t even know who went in for the kiss first. All he knows is his hands are gently rested on your waist and he’s actually kissing you right now, and you can feel the way he’s smiling into the kiss.
It takes a few minutes for you two to pull away, a little out of breath, and he leans in to try and kiss you again but your noses bump against each other’s, and the pair of you can’t help but laugh at how the events of the night had turned.
Jisung marvels at the way everything feels so simple, so right.
“I’m not dreaming, right? Like this is actually happening?”
You laugh even more.
Jisung’s always been afraid of venturing into the unknown, always kept his feelings hidden, and he’s always loathed his mouth for being so uncontrolled with the things he says. But now, with you in his arms, he couldn’t be any more happier about the slip of his tongue and how being with you feels like one of the rare rights among all the wrongs.
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wegc · 5 months
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perv chan content coming up u say👀👀how funny considering that i’ve been having perv skz brainrot for days🤭consider this for me rq.
so we know from that one 2 kids room how channie loves feeling needed right? combine that with the clothes stealing trope and u get:
perv roommate channie who steals your clothes from your room to get off with because the smell of you makes him fucking dizzy. and there’s an added bonus—he knows you’re gonna come to him, tearing up and face flushed from frustration, begging him to pretty please, help me find my favourite pair of lace panties, i’ve looked fucking everywhere! how can he say no to you, when you’re begging so pretty, when you want his help so bad? he just has to be a good friend and search the place with you (no, it’s not because the feeling of you asking him, needing him and nobody else makes his head spin and his pants tighten). don’t forget to bend down and look in that corner over there!
and if he’s memorizing every inch of those pretty teary eyes, imagining how much more they’d water while you’re choking on his cock, or if he’s shamelessly watching that cute ass of yours as you get on your knees and bend over in those obscenely revealing shorts you love wearing around the house? if he strokes himself later that night to the image of you grinding your soaking cunt against him, pleading with him to fuck you stupid in that adorably whiny voice?
well. that’s nobody’s business but his own, is it?
mwah love u !
-🍒 anon
perv!chan who's unhealthy obsession with feeling needed has his cock aching every time you're begging him to help you look for your stolen panties because what? my y/n needs me? she's relying on me? only me?
chan finds himself entranced when you rush to him, breathing heavily and teary-eyed because he can't prevent his depraved brain from thinking about how you'd pant and cry even more when he's fucking into you deep and rough with zero intentions to stop. he can't stop thinking about how you'd cling onto his strong, buff arms, mewling and hiccupping against his mouth, sniffling cutely, begging him to make you cum. begging him to cum inside you and stuff you full. you need it after all, don't you? only channie can contain all that fussing, right? maybe he should stuff your mouth full with his cock right after to keep you from whining!
let's not think about how he'd graze his clothed cock against your ass as you're bent over! he feels so guilty; you're genuinely upset about those stupid, flimsy lace panties that drive him insane too, but he's far too greedy to give them back. either way, he can't give them back now! not when they're soiled with his warm, sticky cum, carefully concealed under his pillow; not when they're beside your cum stained plushie! it smells so much like you! did you push your tits against the cute toy? did you grind your insatiable cunt against it? just one more time. one more load and he'll give them back. should he wash them before doing so? or should he leave his filthy cum on them for you to see?
he'll just have to buy you a new ones that he'll eventually steal again, i fear!
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priniya · 7 months
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🌊 ASSUMPTIONS
SYNOPSIS. jj maybank gets a little too involved with a kook for his friends’ liking, but he wouldn’t be jj maybank if he gave a shit. on contrary, you do and it bothers him.
NOTES. jj maybank x kook!reader. a little short + not proofread
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you definitely underestimated how much things people assume on a daily basis. it had never bothered you before you got with a certain blond pogue — maybe, because beside your small friendship with sarah cameron (and an occasional hook up with her older brother), no one really cared. then you started hanging out with jj maybank and nothing was truly the same.
some people shamelessly assumed that your sweet relationship was strictly of convenience. maybank was with you for the money, giving you weed and fulfill your sexual needs whenever you wanted. some would say that you knew how rafe… wasn’t exactly a fan of pogues, so you hung out with jj to get back at the oldest cameron sibling.
on the other hand, hardly anyone reckoned that due to all that time you were caught spending together made you genuinely like him. no, you always had to have some kind of cruel reasoning for skipping school to smoke weed in the back of twinkie (and make out).
did it bother you? unfortunately, a little bit too much. your boyfriend just got into your room by the halfway open balcony door while you were scribbling down math homework on your ipad. your coursework was one of the small amount of activities that let you rest your brain and get busy with something so insignificant to your relationship.
jj knew you were subconsciously upset. he didn’t really have to ask — the uneasiness painted all over your gorgeous face. his long, distressed sigh got you out of trance. your eyebrows scrunched at the sight in front of you. how did he get there?
“tell me what’s in that pretty head of yours.” he muttered, face inches away from yours after having kissed you — too shortly for your liking.
“my brain.” you let out, hands going to the collar of his t-shirt, unsuccessfully trying to pull him into another of those sweet, mindblowing kisses. “jay.” a groan slipped from your lips as he refused once again and you felt like going insane, one night he says he can’t stop himself from kissing you and now he does? liar.
“let me rephrase the question, you brat.” his eyes rolled. “what’s bothering you so much that you can’t tell me?” his fingers brushed through your hair as you sat yourself in his lap.
“kiss me and i’ll tell you.”
“tell me and i’ll kiss you.” another groan left your mouth, earning a quiet chuckle from him. he was worried, but sending you over the edge was funny, hilarious even.
ten minutes. that’s how long the two of you sat in silence until you were ready to reveal the reason of your upset, thoughts organised and your forehead against his shoulder, while his fingers were tracing different patterns on your back, sending a shiver down your spine once in a while.
“i just— shit, it’s so stupid.” you mumbled, your voice muffled against his shoulder. “i hate that people think you want something particular from me or the other way around.” it’s there and jj couldn’t help but chuckle at your explanation.
not because he thought little of your worried, but because it was almost unlike you to be so bothered by people so insignificant in your life. “doll.” the blond cracked a smile, gently nibbling at your earlobe. “me and you, ride or die, eh?” jj’s smile only got wider, when you nodded. “let them assume whatever they want, why stop ‘em? you know your feelings and i know mine. this is the thing that matters. not gonna lie, though, if you were with me just for my weed or my dick, that would probably give me a god–complex. imagine that the hottest girl in the entire outer banks is with you, because you fuck her so well? jesus, i might get a hard–on right now.”
“you really can’t simply tell me that you love me, can you?” you asked with a smile lingering on your lips long before he finally pressed his mouth against yours.
“you know i do, doll. where’s the fun in that?”
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actual-changeling · 10 months
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See, but there's something about the first fight in episode 1 that just doesn't really. fit. It very much feels like we are missing information here.
I have been thinking about this show all day, as one does, but in particular why Crowley gets angry enough to shoot literal lightning at a nearby building. We have experienced him upset before, but never to that specific degree, and their disagreement over Gabriel just does not explain it for me.
My hypothesis: a big, important fight happened right before season 2 picks up that left Crowley feeling rejected and Aziraphale neglected.
The biggest clue is the snippet of conversation about myself vs. ourselves.
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"I thought we had carved it out for ourselves"
He almost sounds offended when he says that, yet Crowley reacts with equal parts hurt and anger, like he is referencing something that we, the viewer, do not have any knowledge of.
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"So did I"
However, Aziraphale seems to understand whatever Crowley is referring to and does not respond with anything in return. Yet whatever wound they just opened keeps bleeding, and when Aziraphale tells him, packaged nicely, to fuck off, Crowley seems more sad than upset to me.
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The to go? is almost said softly and with an initial confusion that hides a LOT of unspoken pain. Plus the HAND MOTION? The gesturing between the two of them while saying "oh, so this is how you wanna do this?" - call me insane, but to me that very much sounds like "oh so this is how you want to break up?"
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The funny part is, if Aziraphale had simply shut up after saying "I want you to help me take care of him", I can GUARANTEE YOU that Crowley would have begrudgingly agreed. But he doesn't. He keeps going and this is the first moment this season where he is genuinely and truly bitchy.
"But if you won't, you won't" with the demonstrative sit-down and turning away from him, eyes forward. It pokes at whatever wound is still open and bleeding between them. Aziraphale wants Crowley to jump over his shadow and come help him, ignoring his boundaries. Meanwhile Crowley feels fundamentally misunderstood and rejected and wants Aziraphale to SHOW that he cares about Crowley more than he cares about fucking Gabriel of all people.
That he cares about them more than about heaven.
And now we have finally reached Crowley's breaking-point. he is so deeply hurt by what Aziraphale just said and did, choosing heaven over them, that the pain turns into anger because he has no other way of expressing or feeling it in the first place.
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You're on your own with this one.
That last look is filled with such disappointed heartbreak, he turns around simply to give Aziraphale a chance to ask him to stay, to apologize, something. Yet again, he does not. He doesn't even meet his gaze, he is looking away.
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To me, he seems almost spiteful, like this entire argument is only superficially about Gabriel but about something entirely else deeper down.
Which - that's the point, isn't it?
Crowley comes back and apologizes because Aziraphale matters more to him than stupid arguments or choosing sides, keeping him safe is the only thing he cares about when it comes down to it. He swallows down his hurt and betrayal and does what Aziraphale wants: ignoring the entire argument and pretending nothing ever happened so they can continue like before.
Only that they can't. The entire season shows just how much they cannot go back to their arrangement, no matter how hard Crowley tries to mold himself to Aziraphale's will. Their final argument simply reflects all of that and more. The same wound that first one was about gets reopened very violently and they're bleeding all over each other with no way to stop it because they're too fucking stubborn to admit that it exists in the first place.
Aziraphale and Crowley can only fix their relationship when they acknowledge the reason the rift between them opened up. Until then, Crowley feels truly rejected and Aziraphale feels entirely neglected, and there is nothing anyone can do to make them confront that.
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j4ystar · 1 year
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attention, please! — park jay
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➞ jay x f!reader
➞ highschool!au band!au
➞ synopsis : jay asks your best friend what your type is because he wants your attention
➞ fluff fluff fluff
➞ word count : 10k
➞ tw : mention of throwing up, if i missed anything pls lmk
ᓚᘏᗢ aj — this has been in my drafts for the longest time and i kept on restarting it BUT yea pls enjoy
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jay thought that this indifference in attitude towards him was just you playing hard to get. until he scrambled his way to your best friends, desperate to find out what your deal was. why you weren’t batting an eye towards him, nor his friends. despite the invitations to the several parties being thrown, as well as the basketball games that he has invited you out to. the answer to all these tactical ways to start talking to you were thrown out the window. something was always seemingly coming up. though half of the time they weren’t even excuses to not go to said event, you were actually busy. 
in a way, jay was angry. a bit upset at you, how you were so casual with him. jay was used to girls and boys alike, messaging him, flirting up a storm with him. jay didn’t have a problem with the attention per say. but when you, his nonchalant class president, didn’t bat an eye towards his sudden strikes of flirtation. an arrow shoots through his heart, though it feels more like a challenge when he feels the need to have your attention on him too. 
so when jay finds himself walking to sunoo’s workplace, the convenience store down the street from jay’s apartment building. he stands in front of the store, kicking the gravel on the sidewalk. he swears to god that he is doing this for the sake of teasing you. that he just needed your eyes on him because it would take a toll on his pride if you didn’t. 
sunoo stares at jay from inside the store. he makes a face, frowning with his brows furrowed as he wonders what the hell this guy is doing. was the store about to get robbed? sunoo uncrossed his arms and stood up, hands leaning onto the edge of the table. 
“HEY! ARE YOU ROBBING THE STORE BECAUSE IF YOU ARE… WE HAVE CAMERAS AND I KNOW WHO YOU ARE JAY.” 
jay flinches before shaking his head, not realizing the person he was searching for was already staring at him, and even worse, assuming that he was about to steal from the store. the dark haired boy stumbles through the door, the door jingling and sunoo is about to scream, feeling as though his suspicion is about to come true. 
“why would you think i’m trying to steal from you?” jay questions him, beelining straight for the cash register at the end of the store while the aisles lay vertically. sunoo sits back down on his chair. squinting at the upperclassmen. 
“because you were just standing there staring through the window. it was creepy.” 
“i’m actually here looking for you.” 
“oh? and what for?” 
“what kinda guys does y/n like?” 
there is an awkward silence between the two boys. sunoo looks down momentarily before raising his head to look up at jay again. 
“who’s asking?” 
“me!” 
“... why? oh my god, do you like her? that’s actually insane–” sunoo begins laughing hysterically, thinking about the several ways that you would respond. he was betting on an incredibly disgusted face, or something more reactionary. 
“no. i don’t like her man– whatever! just don’t say anything alright?” for a moment, sunoo feels bad for him. for one, you had never really talked about liking boys like jay, so realistically he had no chance in the first place. two, jay seemed sincere. but he knew otherwise than to trust someone like jay. he had heard so much talk about the way he had behaved and he knew you’d be absolutely repulsed with the way he acted. but the genuine look on his face seemed like this was something more than wanting to play around with you. 
“i don’t know how to help you. the only person y/n has liked is the drummer from that one band that played at the school festival last year… uhhh what was their name? oh! kim jaehyun from class 3-C. they were together for a little bit last year but it didn’t really last long,” sunoo pauses, waiting to see what jay has to say. sunoo knew jay was the furthest thing from a musician, he was a big bulky athlete, and so he continues as he sees jay’s slightly dejected face “yeah.. from the look on your face i can tell you’re disappointed. so why don’t you drop this? there are plenty of girls out there to pester– HEY!” 
jay is already leaving the store. his footsteps are heavy as he begins to fish his phone out of his pocket. he doesn’t know why he feels like he has something to prove. he can most definitely pull, he knows that. but he can most definitely pull you too. he did feel this stirring feeling in his stomach. he was treating this as if it were a game. and why was your heart the one that jay park was so eager to capture? 
jay is quick to pull up jake’s contact page first. a couple of rings come through until jake groggily asks jay what’s up. jay rarely ever calls, it’s always a matter of texting the group chat whenever he has something to say. it also ends with him being seenzoned by all his friends. 
“did you just wake up?” jay asks in disbelief, asking as if he hasn’t slept like a log after school. 
“yeah what the hell do you need?” jay can hear jake shuffling around in his bed, followed by yawning. 
“we need to start a band.” 
— 
the following day, jay begins to pick up his pace as he glances at his wrist watch momentarily. he was going to be late to first block yet again. the teacher already had something against jay and his tardiness, he knew coming in late would result in him kneeling outside the classroom with his hands up in the air. if it wasn’t his poor time management it would be his inability to wear his school uniform properly. it always had to be something, whether he accidentally left his name tag at home, or if he didn't button up his polo shirt correctly either. 
he stares down the crosswalk lights, watching as students are already running into the school gates and past the security guards as well as the uniform teacher inspector who is stopping students every now and then. jay looks to his right, noticing a familiar head of hair. 
you stand beside jay with a pair of headphones on, though you wear a nervous expression on your face as you’re watching the students get stopped by teachers for being late and for breaking the dress code. jay’s eyes flicker onto you and then onto other people. however he can’t help but think how cute you are as you slightly bounce your head to whatever song you are currently listening to. you weren’t wearing your usual uniform, the proper blazer was replaced with a light gray cotton sweater, you were still wearing the school button up and the skirt. you were also missing your name tag. 
the green stop light flicks red, and the big red X indicating that pedestrians may not cross is now depicted a white silhouette of someone walking. the rush of other late students walk past jay, who is still staring at you. you walk with the rest of the teenagers, as if you were being swept away with a current of bodies that are rushing to get to school. jay begins walking too, eyes remaining on your walking figure ahead of his. 
whilst the others are bolting it through the gates, trying to dodge the inspector. jay doesn’t lose sight of you among the other students. though he watches as you calmly walk past the inspector, attempting to play off the fact you weren’t wearing your name tag. the inspector recognizes you though, knowing you were an honour student, as well as a class president, the inspector flashes you a disappointed look before telling you to stand to the side with the other kids as he writes down your name on the paper attached to the clipboard. jay passes through inspection in a flash. he quickly unclasps his name tag from his blazer, stuffing it into his pant pocket before joining the line where other classmates of his. he joins you in holding your bag above your head, the punishment that the dress code inspector has instructed you to do. finally, you turn your head to meet jay. though your eyes avert up slightly, to look into his eyes. 
jay feels his heartbeat quicken and he nearly drops his bag when he feels his knees buckle slightly from underneath him. he wants to say something, but he knows by the way your headphones can’t contain the volume of your music that you can’t hear him.
“your headphones are really loud. that’s bad for your ears.” 
you remain stoic faced, furrowing your brows slightly before letting go of the bag above your head with one hand and coming to remove one headphone muff from off your ear to hear what he had said. you look at him with a slight expectancy.  jay feels the heat rising to his cheeks as he awkwardly repeats what he said to you. 
“i said your headphones are really loud, listening to music that loud is bad for your hearing.” he tells you. you give him a blank stare. “oh… yeah i know.” though that convinces you to remove your headphones fully and you pause your music. 
“then why do you do it?” jay asks you. you look at him as if he had asked such a stupid question when you didn’t think of it in that way. “i don’t know.” you answer bluntly. you don’t really know to how answer that. “i think it just blurs out the rest of the world's noises.” you admit to him. jay looks down at you with a glint in his eye, yet he doesn’t know he is subconsciously starting to smile. 
“do you not listen to music at a loud volume?” 
“i do. but i’m more of a play it out loud type of person. or you know, blast my amp when i play guitar type of guy.” jay doesn’t know what’s coming out of his mouth, he most certainly plays guitar, though not in the way the band sunoo claims you like does. the rest of the school doesn’t know about his little hobby either, they only really know his athlete side. 
jay averts his eyes to his shoes before they flick back to you. you have softened, become more calm and less tense around him. “you play?” jay presses his lips into a straight line. again, averting his eyes anywhere but your trained gaze. he nods and you crack a smile. jay thinks that sunoo wasn’t joking when he told him that you were into musicians. but then again, why would sunoo lie?
“cool. me too. i’m guessing you play electric?”
“i play both, but i enjoy the electric more.” you nod attentively, jay wants to keep talking to you but the inspector had begun his scolding towards the students irresponsibility for being both late and for breaking dress code. you hear jay snicker from beside you, wondering what he was laughing at, you crane your head to look at him with a questionable gaze. he nods to the inspectors toupee peeling off the side of his head and you nearly let out a loud snort before controlling yourself and letting out an stifled giggle instead. you and jay stand by each other giggling quietly to yourselves until the inspector finally finishes his lecture and lets you and your classmates leave to head to class. 
jays arms ache, and while he thought you were waiting for him, he looks up to already see you far ahead of him, making your way up the school stairs and into the school's main doors.  
— 
“jay were you serious when you said you wanted to start a band?” jake questions his friend, jay and his friends spend their lunchtime outside on the field in front of the school. his friends and a couple other students play soccer together. jay sits by the benches on the perimeter of the grassy field with a drink in his hand. jay doesn’t really have any other extracurriculars other than soccer and basketball, but both those seasons were over already and spring was coming in hot. 
jake takes jay’s silence as a yes and he slumps down beside him on the bench, he fans himself from all the heat his body garnered after running around like an excited dog for the past 15 minutes playing soccer. 
“i mean i wouldn’t be opposed to it. you know i can play bass pretty well.” jake tells him. jay nods, knowing fully well he and his friends were able to pull it off. he had thought about it whilst laying in bed the night sunoo told him at the store. 
“and sunghoon knows how to play the drums, heeseung could sing.” jake adds on. 
“i mean if the others are down… count me in.” 
jay spends the afternoon rounding up the members for his band. sunghoon was a bit skeptical at first, he had been trying to balance his figure skating outside of school, his studies and now the band was beginning to get a bit too much for him. however heeseung was just happy to be there. however, as jay began to expand more on why he wanted to start a band, sunghoon was beginning to warm up to the idea. 
jay finds himself daydreaming in class already. if he hadn’t paid attention before, he certainly wasn’t paying any attention now. the following days consist of jay begging the music teacher to let them borrow the music room after school to practice, and jay enlists the help of jungwon, yet another honors roll  student, to sign them up for the spring school festival. you were friends with jungwon because you were both on the student council. jay would’ve gone to you, but because he was late on signing the band up he feared that you wouldn’t even let them perform. 
“your band is going to be opening for the senior class band. i’m sorry i couldn’t get you a full set. most of the spots had be taken up by other performances.” jungwon apologizes. as he was part of the student council that was responsible for the spring festival events, he was able to talk with the other performers to squeeze in jay’s band since they were late on signing up for the festival. it didn’t matter to jay, it’s not like he would be in the band for any longer than a year, it was something on the side, and plus it was to harness the attention of a certain person. 
as if jay hadn’t struggled to talk to you enough, it didn’t help that you pretended he doesn’t even exist. does that little bonding moment in being late together not mean anything to you?! obviously it had meant a lot to jay because the moment of laughter together left feelings of swarming butterflies in his stomach every time he thought of it. usually this ended in himself pinching himself, any possible way to get him back to the real world because there was no way he was falling for you when it should be the other way around. he was the woman woo-er. and his plan to get you to finally fall for him was just so that he could look you in your face and say “i told you you’d fall for me” though realistically the amount of effort going into this truly meant he just wanted you to look at him and fall for him period. and to be fair, if you looked at him he would instantly crumble and shrivel from timidness. 
jay’s train of thought gets cut off when three girls approach him at his desk. he pauses his song writing and closes his notebook almost immediately before looking up at the girls. 
“we heard you signed up for the spring musical festival. we didn’t know you could sing and play guitar. that’s so cool.” gyuri has a way with sweet talk. her long dark hair cascades over her shoulders and her eyes twinkle as she maintains eye contact with jay. just past gyuri and her friends, the classroom door slides open and you and sunoo walk in. sunoo is talking about something whilst following you to your desk while you listen patiently to your friend. 
“hello?” 
jay gets up abruptly, flocking to your desk which was on the other side of the room near the back door. he stands to the side of your desk and sunoo stops speaking as he watches jay meander wordlessly. you turn towards your friend, wondering why he had stopped talking but sunoo is instead staring at jay with a blank expression on his face. 
“my friends and I signed up for the spring festival.” he tells you, rocking from the balls of his feet to his heels. “could you please move, i can’t reach something in my desk.” you ask, jay apologizes, shuffling backwards as his hand comes to the back of his neck and he itches. sunoo sticks his tongue out teasingly towards jay but his sour expression quickly changes to a sweet smile when you rise up from checking the inside storage compartment of your desk. 
“it’s really not here sunoo, i think i have to stop by the stationary store when he go home today to get a new one. gosh that is so annoying, i won’t have that much money from my allowance anymore.” you frown. jay’s face contorts to that of concern. “what are you looking for? i can help you find it.” he suggests. giving you a soft smile. 
“it’s just my name tag. i think i lost it.” you tell him dismissively. your hand swatting the air as you’re ready to walk off. “and i heard, word gets around if you hadn’t noticed.” you motion to the three girls that are giving jay the stank eye for ignoring them. 
“hey, you’re coming to get food with us after school right?” heeseung questions. watching as jay places his indoor shoes in his respective cubby. “yeah, but you guys can go on ahead, I have to go to the store quickly.” he tell him. heeseung nods before the end of the day bell rings throughout the halls and kids begin flocking out their classrooms and flooding the halls, eager to get out of the school. 
jay walks to the nearest stationary store, walking up to the front counter with long and quick strides. 
“hi there, what can i do for you?” an old man asks him, recognizably he was owner of the store that jay had been going to when he ordered his other name tags throughout the years of his schooling. 
“i’m looking to order a new name tag.” jay says, searching for his wallet out of his bag. 
“of course. what’s the name?” he asks. jay is busy rummaging through his bag to hear the jingle door opening behind him. you recognize jay by his voice but his back is towards you when you emerge through the door. 
“it’s [y/f/n].” 
“can you write that on this slip of paper. it’ll be done in just a few minutes.” he kindly tells jay. jay nods, taking the paper and writing your name on it. you cheeks grow flushed as you realize the act of kindness jay was doing for you. you can’t decipher the reason for your heart's rapid beating. part of you was thinking you were just hearing things. jay could’ve said another name similar to yours. yet what are the chances this similar named person also lost their nametag and needed a replacement.  afraid he would see you, you leave the store in a hurry. grabbing sunoo by the wrist and dragging him far away from the store and beginning the trip to your neighborhood. 
jay hears the jingle of the door this time, and he turns around expecting someone to be there yet he finds no one except for the door closing on its own. a chill runs down his spine before he swishes around to proceed with the payment of the name tag. within a few minutes, the name tag is put into a small mesh drawstring bag and handed to him. to which, he stores in his pocket. he thanks the owner before leaving the store and beginning to make his way to the restaurant where his friends were eating. 
jay has never felt more embarrassed in his life. he has no reason to be embarrassed. but all the eyes on him, for once in his life, he can’t stand the staring. classmates watch the interaction between you two. jay hadn’t expected a hoard of students to enter the classroom at the exact moment he started to converse with you. the pair of eyes he’s always wanted on him are now staring at him and he can feel the slight wobble in his knees. 
“jay?” you call his name and it brings him out of a trance. 
“everyone’s staring, what are you doing?” you scan over your classmate, wondering if he was feeling sick. but you had a feeling you knew why he had approached you in the first place. jay places the pink mesh drawstring bag on your desk quickly and he looks as if he is about to implode, his ears have become so red that he simultaneously looks like he had a violent allergic reaction to something as well. the both of you can feel the pressure from the several students watching, and the whispering that was so obviously about you and jay caused you both to turn absolutely red. 
“you told me you lost your nametag so i got you another one.” he tells you quickly. you don’t really know what to tell him except the pounding beating of your heart can tell it all. jay’s hand rests momentarily on the edge of your desk, though he fears that if he takes his hand off your desk, a sweat imprint of his hand would be left behind and jay becomes queasy at the thought so he retracts his hand quickly and wipes him on his jacket. 
you grab the small bag and pull the nametag out. inspecting it before clipping it onto your blazer. jay doesn’t miss the way you smile softly up at him. he can’t help but smile down at you too. you forget for a second that everyone’s eyes are on you.
 “thanks jay. is there any way i could repay you?” 
“come watch me and my friends open for the spring festival?” 
it was one little favorable way of repaying jay. that was the only thing you had to do. just watch him and his friends open the show. it couldn’t be that bad. not bad in a way that they were going to be bad. but bad in a way where you had to stop yourself and watch yourself from catching any feelings. 
though jay had been so kind to you lately. you were always a self-guiding hand to yourself though. always quick to stay away from relationships and boys like him more importantly. you knew how others perceived him. while you heard about the way he would treat girls, something about the jay that was being so respectful to you made you assume that he was adapting, either that or he was genuinely a changed person. 
it’s not like you didn’t know that his band was performing, you didn’t even know he had a band until sunoo showed you a new advertisement poster for the spring festival that include a new band that you hadn’t heard of. turns out, it was jay’s band. 
you were mostly attending the festival because sunoo loved going to them, not to mention your little delusional “crush” on that upperclassmen drummer who played in the school festivals all the time. you weren’t entirely delusional, you knew you had no intention in seeking a relationship with him anyway, it was just a fun way to stay grounded. you had crushes like this all time, little minor infatuation flicks with people you thought were cute. 
you were so good at ignoring jay at first. ignoring him was easy, he was barely in class in the beginning of the semester, either that or he was constantly sleeping. you would never know why he started trying to talk to you. it started with asking you about homework that he had missed, to asking you if you were going to parties that you weren’t even invited to, not that you really cared. to asking you if you were going to sports games. admittedly, you knew why girls would fall at his feet, he was attractive. 
but you were extremely stubborn, you were guarded, that’s just the way you usually were. people only really came to know you as this high achieving honors student that was conveniently the class president. everyone was tense around you, everyone walked on eggshells around you because obviously as someone who would study constantly you would never have time to go out right? 
for the longest time, you learned how to be independent, how to protect yourself from disappointment. even if that meant setting up impenetrable walls. of course the little sunshine sunoo had used a pogo stick to jump over said walls. and now jay park. the little weirdo comparable to the jehovah’s witness people that would come to your door every day. somehow jay had pried his way into your heart. perhaps he had scaled the walls.
after several accounts of rejection to his offers, which you come to soon realize were offers that didn’t make you feel like an outsider to the rest of your classmates which you had ultimately rejected because of your fear. when you had accepted his invitation to watch his band open for the spring festival. it almost didn’t feel like a favour.
— 
“you’ve written a song already? i’m surprised you’re so invested in this band thing.” sunghoon scans over the chicken scratch notes scribbled down as jake and jay’s “sheet music”.
“dude… are you in love with someone? these lyrics are about wanting someone’s attention.” heeseung laughs. jay turns to his friends, jungwon sits on the bleachers by the side of the music room with an amused smile. jake lets out a snort. fingers turning his bass guitars tuning keys. “isn’t it obvious. he wants yn’s attention.” 
“that’s not what the songs about!” jay defends himself. the familiar feeling of heating resurfacing to his face. “oh yeah? then what’s it about?” heeseung smirks. jake wiggles his eyebrow at his friend as sunghoon lets out a holler. “all this effort just for a girls attention. looks like we have to do this so jay gets a girlfriend.” heeseung lets out a joking sigh. 
“i don’t want her to be my girlfriend, i just want her to fall for me.” jay admits aloud. frustrated that his friends just were getting it. his friends halt their laughter as they look at him with doting stares. they all look at one another, sharing the same type of communicating look “… because you fell for her too, right?” 
feeling as if he had to sit down after standing up abruptly. jay recalls all his signs of attraction. he doesn’t believe in love at first sight, though he does believe in attraction at first sight. when had jay first laid eyes on you? it must’ve been the grade 10 open house. upon being introduced to their home room classes, jay saw you. no drastic changes since then. you are a little shorter than you were now. sunoo was still your very best friend among those days, he often wondered how you came to know the boy. did it date back to when you guys were still in middle school? elementary even? he wondered how sunoo was the only person allowed in your personal circle after distancing yourself from everyone. 
when going out with his girlfriend at the time, jay had spotted you waiting at the bus stop alone at night.  you were still in your school uniform but you looked tired, or it could’ve been the poor lighting of the street lamps illuminating sides of the road that casted dark circles upon your eyes. the next day at school, he noticed you weren’t there and had grown concerned that perhaps you hadn’t returned home last night. he overhears sunoo talking to his other friends at the canteen during lunchtime that you had just fallen ill and he is glad nothing had happened to you. 
jay and his friends walk into the convenience store that sunoo works at and there you are sitting behind the counter with sunoo. he notices you’re preoccupied with your homework, though he can’t help but notice the way you twirl your pencil in one hand whilst tilting your head to the side, as if looking at it from another angle would help you understand it better. he thinks it’s cute.
if he was already feeling his stomach twist and turn before talking to you in any instances in the past, then seeing you now would definitely have his stomach folding in on itself. he wants to hit himself for not being the smooth talking jerk he was when trying to talk to other girls. 
you were no better. sunoo is busy retagging items to be put on the shelves. you are sitting behind the cash register counter with your face hot and red, leaning back on an office chair with your arms crossed over your body. 
“when i walked into the stationary store i overheard him ordering the name tag for me.” you tell sunoo, your hands come to your face. hiding the blush bleeding onto your cheeks. “dense much.” your friend says, your brows furrow at the blonde headed boy, neck nearly snapping as you stare daggers into the side of his head. 
“how am i dense?” 
“he obviously likes you. how far has he gone for other girls? sure, paid meals are one thing but being as thoughtful as ordering a name tag so you don’t have to go through the hassle? he’s making your life easier for you.” it surprised you with how much sunoo knew about this type of stuff, to your best knowledge, sunoo had never been in a relationship. you gawk slightly at his thought process. 
“so, do you like him back?” 
you quickened your pace, hoping to make it on time to the music room to see if jay was still there practicing. you hold two apple juices in your hands before. curses for whoever made the school so incredibly long because why were you running a whole 3km race just to get to the room you wanted. 
by the time your hand reaches out for the door frame of the music room, the door slides open and jay walks out, almost body checking you with his guitar bag barely missing your face. you don’t know why your breathing so heavily, it was just a very fast paced walk from across the school. jay wisps around to apologize to the random person he almost hit. though his mouth contorts open, nothing comes out when he sees you standing there a bit frazzled. 
“sorry, almost hit you there.” jay apologizes, not stopping himself from smiling as he looks at you. his eyes glaze over you.
“i was looking for you.” you completely ignore what he says, not really caring if he had smacked you with his guitar or not. your words has his mind racing and his stomach doing teeny flips. 
“are you alright?” now it’s your turn to simply melt at his words. you want to scold yourself and tell yourself to get it together. your knees turn wobbly and for a moment you lose your balance but you catch yourself, jay’s arm juts forward at your flinching and this small gesture has you looking between his arm and his face. god, his handsome face. it was so punchable and some days you wanted to do just that. 
“i’m fine, i’m just here to say thank you, again.” when jay looks at you, he doesn’t see the uptight class president that presents herself to everybody. he’s grateful for your thankfulness, but he doesn’t want a thank you. he wants you. but for now, he’ll just have to keep it in, at least until the festival. he retracts his hand but before he does you shove the apple juice drink into his hand. the mere feeling of your fingers brushing against his even for just the split second leaves tingles that don’t subside until he watches you turn your back on him and begin speed walking away. 
“you’re falling for me, aren’t you?” your steps falter, wondering if he had really just said that. jay doesn’t believe it himself. you don’t really know how to respond but jay begins walking to come up beside you with a cheeky smile. 
“you’d like that, wouldn’t you?” your eyes fail to meet his, you’re scared you might actually fall, quite literally, this time. 
“i wouldn’t be opposed to it, no.” jay cracks open the apple juice drink and begins drinking from it. 
“how’d you know i liked this drink?” 
“i didn’t know, it’s just my favourite drink.” wrong, sunoo told you what drink jay comes in to buy the most. you weren’t necessarily lying when you told him it was your favourite drink either. 
“oh my gosh, we’re meant to be.” jays cheeks hurt from smiling, he knows he’s going to go home and lay in his bed all night thinking about this. “yeah right. just because we like the same drink?” 
“meant to be.” he says in a sing-song way. this makes you laugh. jay likes it when you laugh. he likes it when he makes you laugh. not really a sight he sees often, but he’s glad he’s one of the people that can evoke such a happy emotion from you. 
when you two reach the front gates of the school, you expect to part ways with jay, considering he would always walk the opposite way from you. but when he stands there wondering why you were just staring at him, he tilts his head slightly. 
“you think i’m letting you walk home alone?” 
“go home jay.” you smile softly. jay shakes his head, he chews on his bottom lip and your eyes don’t leave them. “you can walk me to that lamppost over there.” you point towards an old lamppost two blocks away and jay takes that over nothing. the walk there is painstakingly slow. though within those two blocks you two talk, and laugh, make banter. jay almost doesn’t want to make it to the lamppost because he knows he’ll have to leave you. you’re thinking the same thing. you weren’t that paranoid about walking alone in the night but having jay there, someone to talk to, helped you feel at ease. jay liked being with you, he liked when he was around you. and not in the way where his hands would feel sweaty. 
“how about that lamppost instead?” 
and this continued until you got home. you stood a fair distance away from your house. the chilling night air was nipping at jay’s face now, but that was alright. 
“ok it 's really time for you to go home now.” you tell him. his smile drops and he frowns exaggeratingly. 
“thank you, again.” you finish. you look so good to him. whether it be in any type of lighting it doesn’t matter. jay catches himself as he feels himself leaning forward, though he plays it off as if he was just rocking back and forth on his feet. you don’t seem to notice though. 
“you probably owe me another apple drink tomorrow.” he tells you. you can’t tell if he’s joking or not but you’re ready to come to school prepared with a bulk case of the drink if he really wants it. 
“get home safe, alright?” 
jay watches you exit into your house and then he begins his traverse back home. thinking about everything that had just happened. now that he had begun to realize his feelings for you, the feelings were beginning to hit him like a ton of bricks. he couldn’t stop his heart from racing. his mind was constantly flooded with memories of you tonight. 
a suspectedly good night was spoiled with a mere text from someone you had least expected. 
3 notifications from kimjaehyun
kimjaehyun 
hey yn
we havent talked in a while…
are you dating park jay? 
the member of the band you had a tiny little crush on had texted you. not that you really had a crush on him anymore. something happened between the two of you last year after the spring festival. just a small situationship that didn’t work out. for upperclassmen, kim jaehyun was immature. everyone said that teenage boys were stupid but you hadn’t realiize, this stupid. 
you scrambled to turn off your read receipts to see if jaehyun had really said what he said. not even a hello? or a hi? 
y/f/n
no… why do you ask? 
you bite at your nails awaiting his response. shutting off your phone you feel as if you were still a younger version of yourself throwing your phone across the room in fear of what his response was. after a few minutes you hear the ping of your phone. followed by another few more pings. wondering if he was just texting you a bunch, you climbed off your bed and sat on the rug opening your phone to see. 
2 new notifications from kimjaehyun
parkjay sent you a friend request
you click on jaehyun’s texts first. why was he wondering if you were dating jay? 
kimjaehyun 
oh thats a relief
can we talk after school tomorrow? 
you wait inside jaehyuns empty classroom alone. wondering where he is. two bottles of the apple juice drink jay likes reside in the opened bag beside your desk. you wonder what jaehyun has to say. especially after the way you two drifted apart and ended things last year. 
jaehyun steps into the classroom, wandering eyes searching for you. kim jaehyun has not changed since you last saw him, you rarely see him around considering he is in his last year now and has classes on the uppermost third floor where all the seniors are. his light brown hair lays untouched and shaggy, he was still sporting the mullet he has had since his first year. and he still smiled the same. striking you in your heart. 
“what did you need to talk to me about?” you ask, wanting to get to point. you had told jay that you were doing something. you told him you were dropping by the music room to drop something off. 
“as you know, my band and i are performing during the spring festival. our set was cut short because of the addition of jays band. i was wondering if you could give us back our set time by.. i don’t know, maybe getting rid of their performance altogether?” he flashes you a grin. how you used to perceive him with such adoration and respect but that had just been thrown out the window. 
“your band can’t hog the entire night, jaehyun.” you tell him, irritatedly wanting to get out and leave the classroom already. “it wouldn’t be fair to them either.” jaehyun’s grin falls at your words. his arms cross together as he places them on your desk and gives you a pout. your brow twitches. still the same old, immature, jaehyun. 
“don’t give me that face, they’re only doing one song and opening for you. you’re being selfish. if that’s all then we’re done here.” you tell him, grabbing your bag off the floor and getting up from the desk. jaehyun stands up in unison to you. 
“wait no don’t go, that’s not all,” jaehyun blurts out. you had already reached the door and was about to step out the classroom. you’re tempted to hear whatever he has to say out. 
“i’ve been thinking about you lately.” your back is still facing him. you shake your head and wonder if his words are laced with sincerity. you haven’t thought about jaehyun in a while. he was the one exception to your “no people allowed through” rule. and upon breaking that, he caused an aftermath of chaos and emotions for you. you try to ignore his statement as you leave the classroom, shutting the door in the process and making your way out the school instead. you forget all about the plans of heading to see jay. jaehyun’s request had turned your mood a whole 180. 
when you arrive home, you open your phone to see messages from both jay and jaehyun. jaehyun has been thinking about you lately. what the hell does that even mean? why does his relapse in feelings come around the same time the two of you were talking last year. safe to say, sunoo receives a call that night. and he appears at your front door with snacks and face masks. 
parkjay 
wya?
wheres my apple drink :((
u didn’t stop by
r u ok?
kimjaehyun
i hope i didnt scare u bc of the sudden confession
but i was honest w what i said 
you don’t respond to jaehyun after that. only leaving him on delivered. you respond to jay though. mustering up some lame excuse as to why you couldn’t stop by. something about your parents asking you to come home. jay had bought the excuse, following up with a couple of texts asking if it was anything serious. sunoo sleeps over that night as well. the two of you falling asleep in the middle of a drama series, and waking up the following saturday morning forgetting which episode you left off on. 
jay grows more irritated as the week leading up to the spring festival arrives. advertisement for the spring festival was put up all over the school. announcements were made of the several bands and dance groups performing. a lot of student made stalls were being set up in the front lawn already. jay was being asked by several students everyday about his band. despite only playing one song, groups of girls and boys have already made it known to him that they were attending just for his band and that they were excited. 
you pry jay to let you hear the song that they are going to be performing, you even ask jungwon to give you a little sneak peak of it as well. upon hearing that it was an original song written by jay, your fascination grows. 
“c’mon let me hear it.” you and jay are walking along the front quad during lunch. jay started inviting you to watch him and his friends play soccer. even inviting sunoo to join them in their games to which he accepted out of competitiveness. 
“no no no no. you’re gonna have to wait just like everyone else.” you hand him one of the apple drinks. the drinks have become a staple in your everyday routine except you both alternate giving each other the drinks instead. half of the time it’s sunoo letting you rob the store and take drinks for free because he knows you’re trying to save money. 
“plus, i’m kinda nervous to show you.” he says, looking down and staring at the pavement. you scoff. “if you’re nervous in front of me what makes you think that you can perform in front of all these students?” jay wasn’t scared of performing in front of crowds, he has done it before but in a different sense, in basketball he has performed in large gyms in front of a lot of people. he wasn’t nervous in front of people, he was nervous in front of you. and for good reason. you played the guitar, he wanted to impress you. 
“hey yn!” 
you and jay turn your heads in unison. jaehyun stands a few feet away with a hand in his blazer pocket and one waving at you. jay’s eyes fixed on the unknown guys name tag. he thinks back to the time sunoo told him this was the guy you had eyes on during last years spring festival. jay’s eyes fall back onto you, you grin fell into that of an unknown expression. jaehyun approaches you two and you plaster a fake smile in greeting him. 
“jaehyun, hi.” followed with a curt nod, jaehyun doesn’t really look his age. he looks older. he’s about the same height as jay. but he notices the fleeting glint in jaehyun’s eye as he looks at you. he notices the smirk playing on his lips. but he takes the most notice in your disengagement in the conversation with him. almost straying away from jaehyun as he approaches. you move towards jay, but he’s all too familiar with that look you’re now giving him. jaehyun’s playful guise drops as his eyes follow yours, landing on jay.
“you must be jay.” 
jaehyun was the so-called ex sunoo mentioned to him the first time he asked about you. jay doesn’t quite know what to say to jaehyun. but from the way he felt as though jaehyun was coming onto you again. jay felt uneasy. he wanted to say something to get you out of the situation, taking into account the disturbed look you had on your face. 
“yeah, jaehyun right?” jaehyun nods. “you’re opening for us the night of the festival right? man, i did not expect you guys to start a band at all. i only really thought you played sports.” he says, a hand coming to his hair, combing it back to get it out of his face yet his bangs still topple over his forehead. jay doesn’t really know how to respond to that. 
“i guess i just have other talents to show.” he shrugs. jay wonders what you found attractive with this guy. were you into his face? did you like his hair? should jay start growing out his hair for a mullet too? he wouldn’t be opposed to a short mullet. or perhaps it was just because he could play the drums. jay could play the drums too. albeit, not better than sunghoon but he can definitely learn if that’s what you wanted. 
“i’m looking forward to the festival jay, i’ll see you two around.” 
jaehyun begins walking away and you let out a deep breath. “that was weird.” jay comments. turning to you and checking if you were alright. “me and jaehyun used to date.” you tell him quietly. jay hears you perfectly fine though. he was well aware you had some kind of crush on jaehyun, but dating was something he never really thought of because you were just so closed off. at the thought of someone else being able to swipe you off your feet, jay grew kind of cold and a chill ran through his body. he wonders why you decide to tell him right now. 
“i’m sorry i just had to tell you because he talked to me for the first time in a year last friday. and he was being a jerk, and that ruined my mood because i was so excited to go and see you but then no, he had to ruin everything and then i went home and cried into my pillow.” you tuck your hair behind your ear, looking down at your shoes. you don’t know why you’re being so emotional, especially out in the open. jaehyun kind of scares you. and watching jay and jaehyun first meet was like two worlds colliding for you. you feared that jaehyun was going to do something that would hurt jay’s feelings to make it look bad on you despite you not doing anything in that sort of way. 
 jay’s hands came to either side of your arms and held you straight. you looked up and he almost felt his heart tear slightly when he saw the tears  springing from your eyes. “why are you sorry? you didn’t do anything wrong.” he consoles you. his hands are arm against your blazer. you’re not sure what complex you to hug jay first, he doesn’t expect it either. here you are, in the middle of the school quad hugging jay because you didn’t want to show your startled tears to anyone. you also didn’t want jay to know that him telling you that you shouldn’t be sorry for something that wasn’t your fault, affected you this much. 
jay’s hands travel to your back while you hug him. unbeknownst to him, it had gone unnoticed that his heart was hammering against his chest. and you, being the neighbor to his heart right now could hear it thumping. “it’s unfortunate he made you upset. i can beat him up for you.” you laughed at his suggestion as you pulled away from him. you felt all warm inside. you played it off as your endorphins fucking up your body but lets be honest, you really knew why you were warm. 
“yeah okay sure. you can try.” even in tears with puffy under eyes you still look absolutely stunning to jay.
“what?! i totally could. have you seen me?”
the night of the festival, students were sent home early to get ready while others stayed at school to keep working on their stalls. other students volunteered to run games and other fun stands. the stage was set up for the performers and the groups were just going through dress rehearsals and practices. there were many firsts for jay, but this was the first time he would be performing a literal call for attention to a girl that he really likes, that he’s not 100% sure likes him in front of a lot of students so yeah, a lot of firsts for jay!
“you look like you’re about to throw up.” jake tells jay who stares at himself menacingly in the bathroom mirror. sunghoon and heeseung take a few hefty steps away from jay who looks pale. “what are the chances that yn doesn’t even get the point of the song? i think that would be hilarious.” sunghoon asks. fixing his hair in the mirror. 
“don’t say that.” jungwon comes walking out of the bathroom stall in some casual clothes. he flattens his shirt out with his palms and slides in between jake and jay in need of the sink. “she’ll understand. i’m pretty sure. as if the lyrics weren’t obvious enough.” 
“‘standing at the crosswalk, i can’t move an inch’ i think it’s cute.” jungwon says while reciting the lyrics jay was so shy about showing his friends.  jungwon moves away from the sink, grabbing a paper towel to dry his hands. “you think everything is cute, jungwon.” sunghoon says rolling his eyes jokingly. “i don’t think you’re cute.” jungwon says in a matter-of-factly tone. sunghoon mimics him with his tongue sticking out and jungwon does the same in return. the other three boys roll their eyes in response to their childishness. 
“are you going to dedicate the song to her like all those cheesy romance movies?” questions heeseung.
“no… should i be?” jay questions, at first he was opposed to it. but if that’s what his friends think he should be doing then maybe he should do it? jake and heeseung shake their heads ‘no’ with distasteful expressions on their faces. “i think you should just leave it up to her interpretation. like how literature teachers make you do it.” jake inputs. jay leans against the wall of the washroom now. staring at himself and then his friends. sunghoon and jungwon continue to joke around with each other. 
“there’s a possibility she would just leave and then boom, i’m heartbroken. or she would come find me backstage and happily ever after.” 
“why are you thinking so negatively? this isn’t like you man. you always work hard to get what you want. you threw away all those nasty habits of playing around with girls. yn literally changed you and now you’re scared?” jungwon asks, pausing his playful fighting with sunghoon to lecture jay. jungwon was right, jay’s friends nodded in agreement. jay was never one to back down from a challenge, and he rarely ever let things get to his head, not in the way this dilemma did. 
“i think i’m just scared of fucking things up with her. i really like her.” 
“that’s what we thought. if you really like her you wouldn’t give up on her. no chickening out.” 
by the time you and sunoo arrived, a lot of students were in the quad. some playing the carnival games that were set up. some were eating the food that students were responsible for serving. music was playing from the stage, but the concerts didn’t start until 8pm, it was only 7:30. 
sunoo proceeded to drag you around, though you were just searching around for any sight of a dark haired guitarist. sunoo tried to shake the nerves off you too, knowing full well you were just here because of said guitarist. it ended up working because for the next 30 minutes, you were preoccupied with the large amounts of food sunoo ordered, as well as the games. even after playing for all that time, you and sunoo were not very lucky with anything that include throwing, catching or shooting. leaving you empty handed from the plethora of plushies that the game vendors were offering. 
“don’t be upset, sunoo, i’ll ask jay to win me a couple and you can have some.” you tell your friend, he laughs before checking the time on his phone. “jay is gonna be going up soon, we should go to get a good spot for the show.” sunoo tells you. you nod, letting him lead the way. sunoo finds a spot not too crowded with people and he claims the area as yours. while waiting you take your phone out to see if anyone has texted you. 
2 new notifications from parkjay
parkjay 
hey are you already at school?
when u see this can u come meet me at the right backstage stairs a few mins before the show starts?
your heart flutters and you tell sunoo you’re going to use the washroom really quickly. sunoo tells you to hurry before the crowd gets any bigger because he doesn’t want you getting lost. you tell him you’ll be quick and you fleetingly speed walk your way to the right hand stage stairs where jay said to meet. 
you round the front of the stage and find jay sitting on the stairs while looking straight ahead. he looks nervous and he fidgets with his fingers before ultimately deciding to stand up but you say something before he gets a chance to leave. 
“did i keep you waiting?” you ask, jay whips his head around and his features soften when he see’s you. he awe’s at your outfit, finding your fashion sense impeccable. something else that he likes about you. jay shakes his head before he steps down a few more flights of stairs and smiles down at you. you meet him at the bottom while he still stands a few steps higher, making him look over you. 
“i didn’t see your text until earlier. me and sunoo were preoccupied with the carnival games and we lost track of time. we didn’t even win anything but we lost a bunch of money.” you tell him laughing. your story makes jay chuckle. “talking to you makes my nerves go away.” he tells you honestly. you’re hoping the sun is setting quick enough to hide the red tinge creeping from your neck to your ears. 
“don’t be nervous, i know you’re gonna do great.” you tell him. you reach for his hand and he lets you take it with no hesitation. you tug jay down a step lightly, he’s only a bit taller than you now. you feel yourself shaking, hoping it’s not obvious with the way your hand tremors slightly. jay seems to understand as he bends down, your lightly glossed lips meet his cheek, leaving a red-ish tint to his cheek. jay stands up straight after you retract from him and you give him a small shy smile. 
“good luck!” 
– 
the concert begins shortly after you return to your spot where sunoo is busy taking pictures with the beautiful sunset lighting in the background. the concert announcer blaring through the speakers bring an influx of students to the grassy field where the concert is taking place. 
you watch as the host of the concert takes a place in the middle of the stage and begins introducing jay’s band. you hear students screaming and cheering left and right before the lights dim down and jay walks out with his members. it really was as if you were at a concert because jay and his friends had fans around the school. girls and boys liked them a lot, so when they appeared it had the audience screaming. 
“this is an original song.. dedicated to someone really special to me. so, enjoy everyone.” 
the lights change into that of a red and orange colour, though there is a spotlight placed onto each of the members and then the song begins. 
you had to admit that jay really was a talented person. from sports to playing guitar, to even his voice. you were a fan of music. and jay looked great on the stage. heeseung and jay’s voice had a lot of screams from the audience and it frightened you a little bit. but sunoo was beginning to piece together the lyrics of the song instead of jumping around with joy like the other students that were watching. he looked towards you, you seemed to be enjoying yourself as well. you were happy and smiling. 
you begin to really listen to the lyrics of the song. wanting attention, panic, standing at the crosswalk. you didn’t want to believe that this song was about you. but at this rate, who else was it about. you were the only person the entirety of the school has seen with jay other than his friends for the past two months and it was unavoidable. you would’ve felt terrible if the song was for someone else and you had kissed jay on the cheek prior to the performance. there was no denying it. you had your attention on jay.
sunoo realizes that it had clicked in your head. you can barely hear your thoughts with the volume of the concert and the singing voices of the other boys. you never take your eyes off jay though. he wasn’t looking at you at the time but his eyes scanned over the crowd frantically whilst he strummed his guitar. he was looking for you. when he finally found you, you were already looking at him. he couldn’t decipher the look on your face but you were smiling at him. your smile was contagious, jay couldn’t help but smile as he sang. 
as the song came to a close, you left earlier than most of the crowd. sunoo followed you out of the mosh pit of students. jay is the first person off the stage when the song ends. his eyes never left yours until the end and when he sees you bolting towards the right stairwell to the stage he knows he has to meet you there. 
when you reach the stairs, jay is already on the last steps and his sweaty palms are back, his heart is ramming against his chest yet again and the butterflies in his stomach are basically a rampaging zoo at this point. you almost pounce on jay when you see him. wanting to hit him, yet kiss in at the meaningful gesture. you bury your face into his chest and he rocks you side to side as he envelops you in a hug. 
“you wrote that for me?” you ask, wanting reassurance, that this was real, that his feelings were real, that you were the one. “if it was about someone else i wouldn't be hugging you right now.” jay tells you. you lift your head to look up at him and his hands come to your cheeks. jay pulls you in and pushes his lips to yours. he parts from your lips, foreheads still touching before you two erupt into laughter. 
“i really, really, really like you yn.” 
“i really, really, really like you too jay.” 
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DONE WAHAHHAOOOO
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neocitybooty · 8 months
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Honey, I'm home. [M]
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Summary: Your husband is constantly away but he makes up for it once he returns.
Genre: Smut, Aged up (early 30s)
Characters: Mark Lee, femme reader
Word count: 1.3k
Warnings: unprotected sex, bodily fluids
A/N: Just some more Mark brainrot. This is also a treat because I've been so busy with life. I'm going to continue with my ongoing fics after this :)
You felt movement from the other side of the bed and a pair of arms wrapping around your waist, shortly after. You slowly blinked out of your sleep and stirred as you were greeted by the moonlight.
It was late.
You waited until midnight, but your husband, Mark…He didn’t show.
Disappointment was no foreign concept to you and it seemed to be a recurring theme in your marriage. You knew it wasn’t Mark's fault and you were well aware of what marrying him would mean for you. The kind of life you would live. Wealthy and pampered… but hidden.
No public posts. No public dates. Lonely birthdays. Lonely holidays.
At least for the time being.
But you loved him. And you knew he loved you too. Some things just couldn’t be helped.
“Babe..” Mark whispered softly in your ear. The familiar and innocent tone was enough to cause your lips to tug upward. You turned your body to wrap your arms and leg around him.
He chuckled and squeezed you tighter as you both buried your faces into each other’s neck.
“Yeah, I missed you too.” Mark said into your neck as he slid his hand into your shorts and softly rubbed your bare ass cheek. He gave it a firm squeeze before finally kissing you. You couldn’t remember the last time you’d felt the warm flesh against your own. He pulled away but you immediately kissed him again.
He looked at you with a puzzled look on his face and you couldn’t help but caress his cheek as the cheekbone rose at a slant and his amused eyes twinkled underneath the moonlight.
“You want to do this right now?” Mark asked you. His voice was low and raspy. Taunting. He knew what you wanted. Because he wanted it too.
You didn’t get a chance to answer. Mark was already pulling off your shorts before you could process your thoughts.
A few hours prior, you were upset. You were complaining to your sister about missing out on yet another holiday because your husband wasn’t in town. You would be going to bed alone, with nothing but an “I love you” to keep you from reaching the brink of insanity. It was reassuring, but it just wasn’t enough. His physical presence was what you truly longed for.
Mark told you…. He told you….you wouldn’t spend Valentine’s day alone this year.
And yet...
You did. But in this moment, you believed a strike against him wouldn’t be fair. In the end, you would be falling asleep in his arms.
“I’m sorry I got back so late, baby. I rushed here as fast as I could.” He softly said into your ear, his tone genuinely apologetic.
You moaned in response as he slipped your lace underwear off of you. A trail of warm kisses decorated your neck as his fingers found his way between your legs. You kept your arms wrapped around his neck and shifted your head so you could kiss him deeply. You were now on your side and draped your leg over him once again.
You gasped and went stiff when you felt Mark’s fingers intrude your wet hole, his thumb gently rubbing your nub. The both of you could hear the squelching of your fluids as he found a steady rhythm. You let out a loud moan as your hips started to gyrate against his fingers.
“Shh, baby. You’re going to wake up the neighbors.” Mark kissed behind your ear and muttered a curse underneath his breath. “Just focus on me.”
Oh how you've missed this.
He brought his lips back to your's and you grew more aroused as your hips and tongue moved along with Mark’s fingers as he continued to slowly move his digits inside of you. You could feel his smile against your lips each time your body would tense up and you would clench around his fingers. But your mind was preoccupied with the taste of his hungry lips.
His kisses were urgent. Needy. Every kiss was as passionate as the last and you only wanted more.
He finally removed his fingers and you felt as though you were breathing for the first time. You heavily exhaled and moaned softly as your hips rolled, the feeling of emptiness becoming unbearable.
“Shiit.” Mark examined his glistening fingers. In awe at the amount of fluid that transferred. “You missed me this much? I can’t wait to show you how much I've missed you.” He bit his lip and gently pulled you onto him, slowly moving his hips as you straddled him.
You felt his hard cock underneath you and it finally dawned on you that Mark had been naked the entire time. He moaned softly when his tip made contact with your wet opening and you reacted by grabbing it and squatting right above it.
Mark reached over to the nightstand and turned on the dim lamp. You smiled at him once the light revealed his features. He responded with a warm smile that reached his eyes and gave you a nod. He did always love to watch.
You held eye contact with him as you slowly lowered yourself, letting his member disappear into your wet core. You gasped as you felt yourself stretching to accommodate his size after months of using alternatives that just didn’t measure up.
Mark whimpered underneath you and slid a hand up into your shirt to fondle a breast. You put your hand over his and started to ride him. Mark let out a breath as his eyes rolled back and he sank even lower into his pillow. You lifted yourself again and lowered slowly enough for you to savor the feeling. You let out a soft moan as you felt yourself getting wetter as the movement grew easier.
“Fuckkk.” Mark shook his head softly and bit his lip again. "Baby, I'm going insane…." Mark could barely finish the sentence before a quiet moan took over. His eyes shut tighter as his fingers dug deeper into your flesh. You yelped when he suddenly started fucking into you. You leaned forward, eventually switching from your feet to your knees, and rested your hand on his chest, a familiar sensation forming in your lower region.
“Are you close, baby? Wait for me. Let’s finish together, yeah?” Mark breathed out as he continued pounding into you. He pulled you into his chest and held your hands behind your back, by the wrists. His eyebrows scrunched together as he began to concentrate so he could last longer- but you began to shake.
“Oh babe no, wait.” Mark whined and gently flipped you over so he was on top. You moaned as he repositioned himself while still inside of you. He filled you up in ways you never thought possible,
You squirmed underneath him as months of pent up sexual frustration surged through Mark’s body. He plunged deeper into you with a long grunt and you instinctively held onto him.
“You take it so well.” He grunted into your ear as he pinned each hand to the sides of your head. He nuzzled his chin into your neck and exhaled as your entire body moved in unison with his thrusts. “I’m so close, baby. Oh fuck..”
You wrapped your legs around him as he stiffened and groaned. You felt the warmth of his seed spill into you as Mark rested on you.
He sighed and propped himself up to look at you with a smile.
“I didn’t finish…” You said softly.
“I've gathered….give me a few minutes and I’ll take care of it.” Mark said as he held eye contact with you. A small smile formed on his lips as he started to caress your cheek.
“Can you do that thing that I like?” You asked him shyly.
Mark let out a small laugh and kissed you. “We’re gonna need a towel.”
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lovely-keii · 5 months
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being their sibling
characters: tsukishima kei, oikawa tooru, suna rintarou
a/n: i write a fic every time i rewatch hq LOL sorry ik i said im abandoning this blog buuuut…happy bday to this blog!! (repost from 1/5 because tags broke :(( )
part 1
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TSUKISHIMA KEI
looks out for you, but he can’t help that hes so emotionally constipated :’( he tries to give you advice because he genuinely is concerned for you but just is unable to word anything properly. see: “you need to stop talking to that person, you’re being a pushover,” but he just wants you to realize you’re letting people walk all over you.
god forbid he has to comfort you because hes the wrong brother for that - you’re definitely in better hands with akiteru. he might walk in on you crying and contemplate if he’ll even say anything or just ignore it flat out, or he’ll say something like “don’t cry, you look stupid.” if you cry more, he’ll end up swallowing his pride and sitting next to you. he’ll groan and reluctantly, “fine, spill it.”
other than that, he’s going to be a sneaky little prick. definitely the type to take revenge on you if you annoy him. you eat the last piece of chocolate he was saving and suddenly you find your charger hidden deep under your bed. also loves to take things without your permission. “why? i’m just using it, it’s not like you need it now.”
if someone picks a fight with you, he’ll be quick to extract you from the situation before saying something ruder and harsher than usual to the person. and if you tell him you like someone from his team, he’s going to look at you like you’re crazy. “are you insane?!” he’s honestly more bewildered than upset. doesn’t let you anywhere near the gym. he can make an exception for yamaguchi though. “at least it’s not hinata…or worse, kageyama.”
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OIKAWA TOORU
your life is never boring with this guy as your brother. you’re literally being dragged everywhere, practices, shopping, team events… you’re like “i’m not even part of the team.” he goes “we can fix that!” and the next day you find out that you’re the manager for the boys’ volleyball team. huh, wonder how that happened.
oh my god, he MILKS you being his manager. “hold my drink, my fans are calling.” “y/n get my towel please.” you’re absolutely seething at the power trip that this guy is on. eventually, you start doing all that for his other team members and not for him, and he gets so whiney. “y/n you’ll get big ugly iwaizumi a towel but not your own sweet brother?!” that earns him a spike to the head from iwaizumi.
he tells you all the gossip about the school, because believe me, he knows A LOT of things. he’ll do his skin care while he forces you to listen to his gossip, cue him getting mad if you try to leave. everyone realizes why you two are siblings when you two walk down the halls and pull the exact same faces at the people he’s told you about in his gossip.
he makes you his little scapegoat for his fangirls. “oh, you want my number? you’ll have to ask y/n for that, they keep my phone with them during practice!” (you dont) “now, why don’t you girls hand all these gifts to my lovely sibling for me?” (you almost immediately chuck them at his face when you see him) but you know the best way to get back at him? when he sees you even slightly conversing with ushijima or kageyama, all hell breaks loose.
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SUNA RINTAROU
the devil if the devil was your brother. he takes the ugliest pictures of you, when you’re asleep, when you’re yelling, when you’re crying over a movie. he also loves to send you pictures of animals and send a “look at you in this picture, so cute”. he also takes your things without asking and never returns it, you’ll just find it in his bag one day.
he also is one to order you around, and it drives you mad. “pass me the remote, y/n.” “but it’s nearer to you.” “i’ll tell mom that you-” // “y/n get me a drink from the vending machine.” “why would i do that” “remember when you snuck out and i-” // “get my bag too when you get yours.” “no.” “what i post that one picture of you when you’re about to sneeze-”
but he’s always looking out for you. when creeps try to approach you, he’s quick to react by shooting them a nasty glare. he’s a silent kind of care. standing behind you on elevators, walking on the outer side of the sidewalk, staying up late til you come home and just telling you he just couldnt sleep. little do you know, it’s something he’s always done even as a kid. putting more food on your lunch box, holding the corner of tables when you pick something up so you don’t hit your head, returning your things that are sprawled around the house to your room so you don’t lose them.
and if he ever finds you crying over some guy, he sighs and sits down next to you. “why’re you crying over an idiot?” he then makes snappy insults at the expense of the guy, making you laugh. “see? you look better like that. now stop crying and let me get some sleep.” he closes the light and shuts the door on his way out.
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qu0rky · 2 months
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Society has regressed too much, media literacy is fucking dead.
It’s genuinely upsetting opening tiktok and finding stupid ass comments like “Alastor’s last name is Altruist!” “Alastor wants to be a father figure to Charlie and he genuinely cares about her” “Alastor has good intentions and wants to help with the hotel for selfless reasons” “Alastor is asexual because Rosie called him an ace in the hole” (he is canonically asexual but that is NOT what that saying means) “Blitz doesn’t have feelings for Stolas” “Blitz is just a mean fuckboy and he isn’t severely traumatized” I GENUINELY HATE YOU GUYS.
You make it so hard to enjoy popular media because it feels like i’m the only one looking more into it and not just believing every superficial little thing😭😭 Especially when we get the POV from Alastor himself, of course he will try to make himself look like a good person who wants to help, THAT’S THE WHOLE FUCKING POINT, HE’S MANIPULATING CHARLIE AND THE AUDIENCE.
It does not take rocket science to figure out that a cannibalistic serial killer may not have the best intentions and is only doing stuff that will make HIM gain something, maybe power, maybe trust (personally i’m inclined to believe that his soul is owned by Lilith which would mean that gaining her daughter’s trust would certainly be of help to get him free).
Don’t even get me started on what some of y’all have done with Blitz’s character because it pisses me off to no end. The way y’all reduced him to just a piece of shit while knowing damn well what he went through just because on the surface he appears rude and overtly sexual is absolutely insane.
Pick up a fucking book please, maybe English teachers asking y’all what the authors meant by saying “the curtain was blue” actually had a point, let’s start looking into stuff we like a little better before spouting nonsense on the internet THANK YOU.
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generalkenobee · 10 months
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A/N: ok so I know this probably won't get many likes or anything but I literally love Chase sm so I need to write this just for my well being because I've loved him since I was like ten, hope you enjoy 💖🩷
Warnings: sfw and nsfw headcannons, aged up!!!, FEM reader (kinda)
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SFW headcannons
•hand holding is such a must with him
•he gives the best hugs, especially when he's in his black sweatpants and sleep sweater because everything is just so warm and gentle
•hes insanely touch starved
•Chase has never had a partner before you so you have to be patient with him, for example
-(Y/N), I don't know why you asked me for help with your homework, it was super easy
He would say laughing, not realizing that he hurt your feelings because you genuinely needed help
-(Y/N), I can't hold your hand right now I'm clearly working on this
Chase would say annoyed while still looking at the screen of his computer
•after a while and some help from you he's learned that a relationship takes time and consideration
•my man lovessss your stomach, no matter the size or if you have cellulite, stretch marks, he loves it so much
•loves to kiss you everywhere, especially because the whole touch starved thing. Chase is always placing a quick kiss to your cheek while he walks by you, first thing he does in the morning and before he goes to bed is kiss you
•physically can't sleep if you're not in the bed next to him
•nicknames he calls you
-sweetheart
-baby
-honey
•whenever he writes your name he always puts a little heart next to it
•usually falls asleep with his head resting on your chest with steady breathing
•loves to have you run your fingers through his hair while he falls asleep and scratch his scalp
•loves when you kiss all his moles and freckles, just basic beauty marks because it shows that you love every part of him
•he gets incredibly jealous of everyone. He's not used to people picking him and genuinely wanting to be with him over Adam for example
•always has mints, gum, or breath, spray on hand
•he takes extra precautions before seeing you (brushing his hair four times, showing twice, brushing his teeth over and over again, making sure hes wearing an outfit he'll know you'll like)
•soooo good with kids
NSFW headcannons
•lovessss when you pull his hair
•so loud, like soooo insanely loud. Moans, groans, and when he gets close whimpers
•he loves when you cockwarm him while he plays video games or when he's working on something
•eye contact while he trusts up into you, it's almost like his way of thanking you for being so vulnerable with him
•things chase says during sex
-s-shit..you feel so warm..s-so welcoming baby..
-this all for me?
-thank you thank you thank you..
-I love you so much...
-its so deep..I-I can feel all of you...
•chase tries not to ever cuss, he thinks there's smarter words to use..but when he's close it's like a whole new person
-f-fuck..fucking shit baby I'm oh my god I'm gonna, aungh..
•this one time you let spike fuck you and chase got upset because he didn't remember any of it, and he also felt jealous for some reason?
•sometimes when you walk by, you'll slap him on the ass through his jeans and he jumps up in fear every time
•lightly grazes his teeth over your neck during sex and you can feel his hot breath against your pulse..
•I feel like he really wants to cum on your face but is way to scared to ask
I HAVE SO MUCH MORE TO SAY ABOUT HIM SO IF YOU HAVE A REQUEST PLEASE SEND IT IN:)))
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Given all the really excellent and interesting talk about this recently, I wanted to write up a quick list of ways we see Izzy being consistently abusive to Ed in season 1, just so I have a handy post to link to the next time someone asks me "wait, how is Izzy abusive?"
(Again, I genuinely like Izzy. I think he's a great character, but dismissing how he behaves in s1 defangs him as a character, cheapens his s2 arc, and decontextualizes a lot of Ed's behavior.)
Izzy is shown as being emotionally abusive to Ed throughout season 1, because he:
Controls the information Ed has access to. In s1e3, we see Izzy tell Ed his own version of events, twisting them to suit his purposes. He does this so easily and cleanly it's clear he's probably been lying to Ed to manipulate his perception of events for a long time.
Isolates Ed from others. We do not see Ed talk to any crew members before s1e4, and even then, Izzy cuts the conversation short. He also prevents anyone from seeing Ed in s1e10 until Ed makes him ask for Lucius. In s2 Ed tells us that he knew very little about Fang despite having worked with him for 20 years - Izzy seems to make a habit of making Ed unapproachable.
On that note, Izzy insults and demeans Ed to other crew members, creating his own narrative around Ed's actions. He says he "massages" the crew when they're worried about Ed's judgment, but what he actually does is tell them Ed's "half-insane." He is creating a situation where Ed is reliant on Izzy for information and the crew feel like they need Izzy to interpret what he presents as the irrational demands of an insane man, even though we as the audience know Ed's behavior is never as erratic or irrational as Izzy makes it out to be.
Insults and demeans Ed to his face. Izzy is not shy about calling Ed insane and unpleasant to his face, and Ed doesn't seem surprised to hear it. I don't think it's a coincidence that Ed admits while he's in the gravy basket in s2 that he's scared he's insane - that's one of Izzy's favorite insults to apply to him and he's clearly internalized it.
Ignores Ed's feelings and wants when he's not acting the way Izzy believes is appropriate. We see Ed constantly reaching out to Izzy in s1e4 to share his thoughts and excitement, and Izzy shuts him down every time. Izzy's created a situation where Ed can only really talk to Izzy, and Ed is clearly desperate for human connection.
Pushes Ed to harm someone Ed loves, even when Izzy knows that Ed "adores" Stede and Stede makes him genuinely happy. Izzy is very insistant about getting Ed to kill Stede, even once it's obvious Ed has already deeply bonded with Stede.
Literally "buys" Ed in return for selling Stede out. This is just gross and unacceptable, not to mention wildly racist. Frankly I think Ed showed remarkable restraint for only punching him once.
Tries to get Stede killed in front of Ed, multiple times.
Obviously, threatens and mocks Ed when Ed isn't behaving "appropriately." When Ed is starting to feel better in s1e10, and is reaching out to the crew and connecting with them, and is painting his nails and singing and generally behaving in a much more feminine and emotionally available way than Izzy would prefer, Izzy threatens him to force him back into the hyper-masculine Blackbeard persona he knows Ed hates and Ed has said he wants to move past.
Goads Ed into violent behavior and is delighted when Ed is visibly upset. When Ed chokes Izzy, Izzy is laughing and grinning and generally having a very nice time while Ed's standing there with tears in his eyes and visibly terrified. He's very happy to have gotten the reaction he was trying to provoke and doesn't care about Ed's feelings.
So, take it all together, and we can see that Izzy has created an atmosphere where he has put himself in control of Ed and has further manipulated the crew so they look to Izzy as a filter for Ed's behavior so Izzy can completely control the narrative. When he thinks he's losing control of Ed, that's when Izzy tries to get Stede killed, without regard for Ed's emotions. Izzy consistently insults Ed, ignores his desires and feelings, and prioritizes his control over Ed's feelings.
Have I missed anything?
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