#that feeling that you don't belong | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

simplykorra · 1 year

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fandom-trash-goblin · 1 month

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I WANT OUT— OUT OF THIS BODY, OUT OF THIS HORROR

lucy dacus // Introduction to the Body in Fairy Tales by Jeannine Hall Gailey // Cinderella II: Dreams Come True // orlando - virginia woolf // Of Woman Born: Motherhood as Experience and Institution, Adrienne Rich // Second Coming of Joan of Arc and Other Plays, Carolyn Gage // @charlotteagerillustration, this post // “eight bites” carmen maria machado // Deluge, Leila Chatti // Howl’s Moving Castle (2004) dir. Hayao Miyazaki // The unknown // orlando - virginia woolf

#poetry #quotes #spilled ink #poems and quotes #spilled poetry #words #webweaving #webweave #aesthetic #poems and poetry #writing #poem #spilled thoughts #web weaving #*mine: graphics #on feeling as if you don't belong to your body #on not feeling beautiful #for anon

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autoraton · 9 months

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same as it never was.

#variant + wip under the cut!#back to the future #bttf #marty mcfly #fanart #my art #illustration #having big lone pines timeline feelings. can you tell #tfw when you're you but you're not You.#you're not the You they know and you're not the You they grew up with or raised and you're not the You who belongs here #tfw everything is better but nothing is right #but if you're the only one who knows any different #then is it really everything else that's the problem?#tfw you overwrite your entire reality but in doing so you created a world you don't and can never belong in #tfw you alone remember a childhood that never existed because you destroyed it #tfw you technically committed temporal genocide but your mom needs you to make space on the table for the turkey #as you can see i am normal about marty mcfly

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inkskinned · 1 year

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you wanted to be a good friend, because you loved your friends, but the truth was that everyone else somehow had a pamphlet on being normal that you never received. most of the time you learn by trial-and-error. you are terrified of the next big mistake you make, because it seems like the rules are completely arbitrary.

you've learned to keep the prickly parts of your personality in a stormcloud under your bed - as if they're a second version of you; one that will make your friends hate you. it feels feral, burning, ugly.

instead, you have assembled habits based on the statistical likelihood of pleasing others. you're a good listener, which is to say - if you do speak up, you might end up saying the wrong thing and scaring off someone, but people tend to like someone-who-listens. or you've got no true desires or goals, because people like it when you're passive, mutable. you're "not easy to fluster" which is to say - your emotions are fundamentally uninteresting to others around you; so you've learned to control them to a degree that you can no longer really feel them happening.

you have long suspected something is wrong with you, but most of the time, googling doesn't help. you are so-used to helping-yourself, alone and with no handbook. the reek of your real self feels more like a horrible joke - you wake up, and, despite all your preparations, suddenly the whole house is full of smoke. the real you is someone waiting to ruin your other-life, the one where you're normal and happy. the real-self is unpredictable, angry.

your real self snarls when people infantilize the whole situation. because if you were really suffering, everyone seems to think you'd be completely unable to cope. but you already learned the rules, so you do know how to cope, and you have fucking been coping. it's not black-and-white. it's not that you are healed during the other times - it's just that you're able to fucking try. and honestly, whenever you show symptoms, it's a really fucking bad sign.

because the symptoms you have are ugly and unmanageable for others. your symptoms aren't waifish white girl things. they're annoying and complicated. they will be the subject of so many pretentious instagram reels. if they cared about you, they'd just show up on time. you care, a lot, so deeply it burns you. you like to picture a world where the comments read if they loved you, they'd never need glasses to see. but since that's a rule you've seen repeated - "one must never be late or you are a bad friend" - you constantly worry about being late and leave agonizingly early. there are no words for how you feel when you're still late; no matter how hard you were trying.

so you have to make up for it. you have to make up for that little horrible real you that you keep locked in a cabinet. you are bad at answering emails so every project you make has to be perfect. you are weird and sensitive so you have to learn to be funny and interesting. you are an inconvenience to others, so you become as smooth as possible, buffing out all the rough parts.

all this. all this. so people can pass their hands over you and just tell you just the once -how good you are. you're a good friend. you're loveable.

#spilled ink #woke up at 530 to write this lmafo #me in a cold sweat:#how do i be normal #edit in the tags:#hey so i've seen y'all talk about like ... wondering if ur ''allowed'' to relate #like if this is about X specific diagnosis #and when i first posted it i really almost labelled it ''please don't assume this is about a specific condition''#because as an artist i am often walking this line of discussing a symptom or discussing my conditions etc #and sometimes yes ! i do want to talk about an experience that is specific to who i am and my condition #but sometimes the effort of the post is about the EXPERIENCE rather than the diagnosis #because yes i am not neurotypical and as a result that influences my work but it is ALSO true that there are many reasons #why someone might experience this particular vague horrible feeling that you are... almost being CHASED by what you ''really'' are.#that you're outrunning your symptoms... that you're not really normal you're just sort of a mockery of a person #.... that's a really isolating and horrible way to feel no matter why you are feeling it. and the nature of this PARTICULAR post is that #it is inherently talking ABOUT that sense of isolation & of feeling not-deserving & of minimizing your own experiences to make urself #palatable for society in a way that others find easy-to-deal-with....#this post is about a certain experience such that my impression is there's a higher likelihood that those who relate #would have more difficulty thinking they ''deserve'' to relate - that it doesn't REALLY belong to them #bc often we are the kind of people who are SO used to being alienated and set aside and ''different'' that we AUTOMATICALLY assume #that things are not ''for'' us... they never have been why would it start now #we are the kinds of people to be ... ''too normal for X diagnosis but too symptomatic to be normal''#[or as this post points out... so good at ''coping''/masking/hiding it that we essentially conform to whatever shape we're poured into]#but i have witnessed others already say in the tags ''thought this was about me but it's about X so it can't be''#and im like ... of course it was about you.#art is not a resource that is diminished by greater appreciation .#you reflect in whatever mirror fits your frame. not just the ones in your bedroom. not just the ones i specifically give you.#there will be - and often are - times that i will talk about my specific conditions... but if you're reading this #regardless of why you're here... we are here together. holding hands through space and time. and i love you for carrying it #and i know you're exhausted. i am too. but i understand. and i see you.

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tesco-finest-aromantics · 1 year

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To other sex-repulsed people: Please understand that your repulsion towards sex is your own issue to deal with. Understand that sex is important to a lot of people (you don't have to understand why, just simply that it is), and understand that it's not okay to treat sex as a bad thing simply because it exists and you're repulsed towards it.

It's completely fine to vent about your friend talking in great depth about their sex life when it repulses you (and maybe tell them that it makes you uncomfortable and you don't want to hear about it) or for any reason for that matter, but don't talk about how much you hate sex in front of the people who find it a positive thing because you'll just end up being seen as someone who kills the fun. It doesn't seem fair, I know, but there are lots of places you can talk about this without upsetting people who enjoy it.

And to non-sex-repulsed people: Please understand that we need a space to air our repulsion to sex. If anything we say isn't directly aimed towards you specifically and it upsets you, then maybe consider that this space just isn't for you. Not everyone has the same positive feelings towards sex that you do, and we have just as much right to talk about how we dislike sex as you have to talk about how much you like sex.

And everyone needs to understand that it's possible to have negative feelings about sex —and to talk about these feelings— without it automatically being sex negativity.

#pk;m shy #asexual #ace #actually ace #sex repulsed #apothisexual #I'm sex-repulsed too. I get it. but please stop treating sex as some evil just because you don't like it.#maybe I have a different perspective because I'm part of a system and my non-ace headmates are going to have sex anyway #with the same body I use. I hate it but I'm not going to make it their problem because this body belongs to them as much as it belongs #to me.#I'm not saying you need to suffer in silence but just don't involve people who are happy to have sex in your negative feelings about it.#I hope this made sense ^^;

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greenapplebling · 1 year

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Jason: I've been feeling really old lately...

Tim: You're 23??

Jason: Yeah, but- Kids these days, man... They act like they already figured out the secrets of the universe and shit like that

Tim:

Tim: THEY'RE OUR AGE

Jason: I know, but still-

#when you're in your early 20s but feel really old every time someone your age says something really stupid #and your first reaction is to complain about the 'youth these days...'#like you don't belong in that group too lol #dc #tim drake #jason todd #batman #batfam #robin #batfamily #red hood #red robin #batfam incorrect quotes #incorrect batfamily quotes #batkids #batbros #source: my friends and i

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tooblindtizzy · 1 year

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(TDI23 SPOILERS)//

first boot club

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 10 months

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Leave wildlife alone. He probably bites.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #a-qing #xiao xingchen #xue yang #shout out to our girl a-qing for seeing the downfall this man would cause at minute one of meeting him #Something to be said about the differences in their 'blindness' also having figurative consequences.#xxc is blinded to consequences by his own naivety. He helps who needs helping because that's what he feels is right.#meanwhile A-qing is falsely blinded; she wields naivety as an outwards illusion while knowing full well that not everyone is worth saving.#She's one of my top 5 fav mdzs characters and I refuse to be quiet about it.#XXC is the kind of person who wants to save baby birds that fall out of nests. Alas. He should have followed the rules of nature:#'If you care - leave it there.'#The little rat man you found is so full of diseases. He bites. He will pee on all your belongings. Do not take him home.#No matter how sad he looks!!!!#For those who don't know what xxc is speaking Spanish: It has become a little inside joke. No significant lore: He Just Knows how.#Everytime he does I am blowing a kiss to the Spanish speaking mdzs community. I will consult you guys on slang as this arc continues.#(Playing around a bit with paneling and layout. To improve means to experiment!)

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stop-breaking-my-heart-dragonage · 5 months

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So I went searching for special dialogue for a romanced Alistair, who stayed with the wardens, about a HoF who made the ultimate sacrifice. Specifically for what he says in DAI. For reasons.

I know what he says about her when she's alive in DAI, so I was curious if he'd saying anything about her if she's dead, like Leliana and Morrigan do. After reading through all sorts of forms and reddit posts where most of the answers were "huh I dunno what he says in DAI, I've never done that route," I eventually found out what he says.

Nothing.

Romanced Alistair says nothing about a dead HoF in DAI. At first I thought this was odd? Surely there's something referencing the fact that he and the warden were in love? even if just for fanservice like in DA2? Some of the comments on these posts blame it on Bioware doing bad writing again but it's hard to tell if they actually mean that, or if they're conflating "I don't like this" with bad writing because honestly? I disagree.

Intentionally or not, Alistair not saying anything about his dead lover is completely in character for him. He doesn't know the Inquisitor. Why should he tell them anything about the love of his life that he lost ten years ago? He's not as open about that stuff like Leliana or Morrigan.

You know what's actually out of character? Alistair giving a random stranger he met for two seconds an item that belonged to his dead lover because "she doesn't need it anymore."

Wasn't it enough to ruin his face, DA2? Did you really need to throw in some botched fanservice as well?

Wait a minute, Varric's telling this story...

Alright, new headcanon: Varric is, as per usual, full of shit. Alistair did give Hawke an item because he felt bad that he couldn't help them with the qunari except it wasn't anything special. But that's not interesting enough, so Varric lied and said Alistair gave Hawke an item that belongs to THE Hero of Fereldan for the sake of showing how super special Hawke is.

#alistair theirin #hero of fereldan #varric tethras #da2 hawke #dao #dragon age origins #dai #dragon age inquisition #imagine alistair reading tale of the champion and getting to this part where he gives hawke an item that belonged to his dead lover #how insulted do you think he'd feel?#also i bet he gets a lot of questions about her regularly because everyone wants to know what the hof was *really* like #but he knows that they don't want to actually know her. they just want an exciting story with a big heroic figure at the center #oh also i couldn't find anything in video or on those forms but if by chance i DID miss anything and he actually says something #and we've all just missed it then let me know and i'll correct this but i haven't found anything and given dai's been out for a while #you'd think there would be something to easily find y'know?

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beanghostprincess · 4 months

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Something I think about a lot is the order in which the Strawhats joined, how that affects their relationships, and how we as a fandom perceive them (this is about the Romance Dawn trio and Sanuso, by the way).

Zoro and Nami were the first two to join Luffy. The Romance Dawn trio. Luffy's first mate and Luffy's navigator. Luffy's anchor and Luffy's compass. He would not know what to do if something happened to them. And of course he loves all the Strawhats. Of course he does. But there's just something about Zoro and Nami that it's personal and intimate in a different way. It's not that they're more important to Luffy, but they're their special people. Their main two. His specialest boy and his specialest girl. Whatever. The thing is that, if we consider this inside the East Blue crew, it just makes sense that Sanuso were so close at the start.

I'm always mentioning how much I miss pre-ts Sanuso because they had more scenes together, whether I referred to background silly scenes or important, character-driven ones. But it's quite literally because they were the only two left. Let me explain:

Sanji has this thing about not wanting to take up much space. Like, his whole personality is to serve and please others, and he isn't used to taking what he wants. Usopp is an anxious mess and he thinks he doesn't deserve to be where he is because he assumes the others are stronger and better than him. They just naturally feel out of place. And they're sharing a ship and an adventure with three other people that, apart from knowing each other before meeting them, they take up so much space in the world without a care. They're shamelessly taking what they want. Slicing people in two, stealing, becoming kings. That leaves Sanji and Usopp in a place of-- Not really loneliness, that's their family now and for once they feel like they belong somewhere but, y'know, they belong without feeling like they deserve it.

I think Sanuso works so well, too, because of their numbers. Usopp was the third one to join. Sanji the fourth. Usopp joined when the Romance Dawn trio was already a thing and he actually hesitated about joining them. And Sanji then met them when they were already like, an actual crew and not just some idiots (well, they are. But y'know, at least four people is better than just two). That thing about 'three's a crowd' and all that? Well, I think there's just some sort of barrier between the Romance Dawn trio and Sanji/Usopp. Not really because, again, they have their own bonds and it works in different ways and the East Blue crew is extremely intimate but please tell me you see what I mean. The Romance Dawn trio wouldn't be a thing if I wasn't right here.

So Sanji and Usopp bond for being the third and the fourth and I think the fact that they don't feel like they belong in the place they should feel at home the most just shows that they just... Feel like they don't belong anywhere. Except when they're together. They're alone together. I think that's why they work so well.

#please tell me you get what i'm trying to say here #there's just something about them being alone together #feeling like they don't belong except when they are next to each other #not wanting to take up space in the world #black leg sanji #usopp #sanuso #romance dawn trio #east blue crew #one piece

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aroacehanzawa · 16 days

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whats ur beef?

My favourite manga lost the plot so now i cope by being a hater 👍

#long answer is i have beef with the direction that the bsd manga has taken #it only superficially resembles the beloved mystery and character-driven detective agency story with atsushi as the main character #i'm dissatisfied with major developments like killing off fyodor and reviving him and pulling this #PSYCH his ability wasn't what you thought it was. with zero foreshadowing or buildup #because the manga has become full of marvel-movie type plot twists that serve little to no coherent narrative purpose except shock factor #it cheapens the story and it cheapens the development of characters and it cheapens the reader's experience #because we can't speculate and we can't draw connections and parallels and engage with the story on a deeper level #what connections there exist (for example between manga and anime) are shoehorned in after the popularity of the anime and #specific characters (e.g. fyodor who was shoehorned into untold origins in the anime) and mostly the characters who bring in money #i.e. fyodor and dazai and chuuya and their relationships especially soukoku. all this at the expense of characters like atsushi or #the majority of the female cast. who have been MIA for god knows how long and who were barely given frame each in the anime's finale #bsd treatment of its female characters has been subpar shounen level at best and now they're completely sidelined #as with most of the original cast and the original themes of the story. in fact i struggle to identify a coherent overarching theme #for the current arc. other than military action scifi movie go brrrr #compared to early arcs where each chapter had a meaningful message to say about the importance of living and what it means to stay alive and #keep going and why we are fighting to keep important people in our lives and to keep ourselves alive #and what it means to belong somewhere and what it means to be good or bad and how your place of belonging affects that #as a long term reader i just feel betrayed and disappointed. by how a story with complex and vibrant characters has become another #generic cashgrab shounen. and i mourn for the lost potential it had and everything the series has build up #only to have plot points abandoned at a whim.#so that's why i'm a hater now 👍#i know a lot of my bsd mutuals are still big fans of bsd so i try not to be obnoxious about it and mainly keep it comedic #like i don't actually hate the manga. because it's so important to me. and i respect the creators of the manga and anime #but it's frustrating to watch a train wreck in real time. and it's my blog i can hate what i want 😔#sorry if there are typos i wrote all this on mobile and can't edit the tags. i didn't wanna put any of this in the main post

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time-is-restored · 8 months

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btw not to make everything about My Fucking Guy but i honestly think one of the things that seperates q!phil out from the other islanders is the approach he takes to dealing with the lack of agency + control all the islanders have over whatever the fuck the federation's doing.

it shows up most prominently whenever tubbo is excitedly telling him about the 'progress' he's made with cucurucho or various investigations (ie: trapping him into a corner with the 'do you have free will' questions), and phil always shoots it down w an immediate 'that doesn't mean anything. curucuho will say anything to mess with you. you can't take anything he says as true.'

and it's not that phil is... a paticularly pessimistic character? he's just EXTREMELY practical. like, he's yet to give up on anyone EVER finding ANY answers (he was the one who initially gave the federation that one week ultimatum w the cage for a cage stream), he just doesn't trust the idea that curucuho is ever going to voluntarily give them. they're uncontrollable + senseless - you might as well argue with the weather.

and like, if that's how he sees the one (1) and only point of contact the islanders HAD with the federation for months, it explains a lot abt his characters lifestyle! ofc he sits on the wall all day, talking to his kids, and keeping his head down. he believes that the federation wants nothing more than to drag the islanders into sick games + tasks just so they can fuck with their head (ie: curucuho revealing he was the one cellbit gathered all that information for). and while he can't totally PREVENT any of that from ever impacting him, he can make sure his kids are well fed, well protected, and as happy + comfortable as he can manage. this is objectively not a perfect situation, there is a guaranteed amount of suffering + fear that he can't mitigate, but he can at least account for it.

like, he REFUSES to engage. whenever curucho shows up, he treats them with total ambivalence. he's not going to get riled up by anything they do, he's not going to get super attached to the guy, he's just gonna laugh it off and irish goodbye it when things drag on. the ONLY time he's strayed from that general guiding principle has been since he's lost his eggs, and can no longer afford to let the federation's fuckery go: those are his fucking kids.

hence the completely unprecedented levels of outward rage and sadness and terror he shows throughout the birdcage streams - almost all directed directly to cucurucho. it's all a completely fair + proportional response to the horror the islanders are being subjected to, but it feels so different bc until now, q!phil has been so dedicated to not reacting, and not giving the federation any sign that they're actually getting to him.

#qsmp #q!phil #LIKE. does anyone else think this! i genuinely believe its like one of the major #traits of his character i feel like u can trace it through Everything.#the man lives with the constant knowledge that sometimes all it takes is a tempting ravine and a badly timed creeper to end a life #whether that life belongs to a stranger or someone you love more than anything else in the world #you COULD rage against that. you could scream and shout and tear your hair out and grieve for the futility of it all #but what does that change? the days march on. death waits either way #and that's not to say he's a laizesfair kind of guy. anyone who's seen him stress out abt chayanne's risk taking + freak out #whenever his kids don't have enough autofeed grist can see that he cares DEEPLY. which resolves into his very distinctive #defensive + protective playstyle. the goal is not to win the fight the goal is to *survive* the fight etc #but the only way that mindset doesn't spill out into unchecked paranoia + complete agoraphobia is with acceptance #'shit happens: the philza minecraft story'#i also think it even manifests in the nightmare sequence w his last words to chayanne? 'they didn't want us to live. we were never supposed #to survive' or whatever the exact wording was #he is FURIOUS and deeply hurt and sad abt the deaths he says so explicitly later #but at the time the first thing he reaches for is. exhausted acceptance. it wasn't their fault. it wasn't his fault. they did their best.#they could only do so much in the face of the federation's Overwhelming Hostility. y'know?#mine

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rareship-rats · 2 months

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hell yeah. getting smashed with the boys. you know how it is

im going to go cry now i think

also i put some of your guys and some of my guys in the bg so yeag. kill me /hj

#knorlok #nosferatu 1922 #count orlok #herr knock #nosferatu #knorlock #the characters on the right in the bg belong to wigdevil and emtjeejooblaa fuck i'm sorry #i feel like shit ill remove them if you want i don't know why i did this in the first place i don't know if this is okay #i'm sorry i'm sorry for everything #i don't want to appear again #i wish everything was just over #i'm sorry i ever was here i'm sorry i ever did anything #i'm sorry #it's awful #everything is awful #so so fucking awful #vampire #vampires

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inkskinned · 2 years

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i both firmly believe that self-diagnosing saved my life and i think that the way tiktok and instagram have recently been spreading misinformation about mental illness/neurodivergence is incredibly harmful.

people who are looking for answers are already people who are in a vulnerable situation.

much of the misinformation appears logically sound; and is presented as definitive fact (prefaced with claims such as "research shows"). it's imperative we remember correlation does not prove causation. it is incredibly dangerous to make definitive statements like "if X happened in your childhood, you now Z as an adult." real scientists will almost always use may or other less-definitive terms. similarly, equating one behavior/experience with any single condition is also unsafe. many conditions have overlapping symptoms; and many people "mask" their key symptoms, even to themselves.

we cannot discern from a singular data point any conclusion. in official diagnosis, for a behavior/experience to be considered a symptom, it must significantly influence your life. many people enjoy an organized space. that is a preference. disrupting your daily life even at personal cost in order to prioritize organization is more likely a symptom.

again, a single data point is not an effective diagnostic tool. it is necessary and important work to catalogue and consider all unwanted/distressing behaviors in order to understand a complete picture of the person.

i will see creators in paid partnerships make generalized behavioral/emotional claims that apply to a large portion of a community, and then they will suggest that the "solution" to that behavior is through their paid partner/through their personal support. "follow for more psych tips/facts" is an incredibly evil marketing tactic. i very rarely see unpartnered/unbranded content on how to aid/comfort those behaviors and feelings.

much of the misinformation employs a subtle technique (called confirmation bias) of setting up a conclusion before "proving" the conclusion. "you know you have X when you experience A,B, and C." no person's experience of their conditions/behaviors will look exactly the same as another's. while knowing certain things might be a sign/symptom of a condition, it is irresponsible to consider it definitive.

confirmation bias is unfortunately extremely effective on tiktok specifically. the algorithm will notice that you interacted longer with the video that "proves" (through a singular video) that you "have" a condition. it will continue to feed you related videos that further confirm what you believe.

this is dangerous because we are, unfortunately, not good at knowing ourselves. i did not know it was unusual to vividly nightmare every night; i didn't consider it a symptom. i was similarly dismissive also of any other signs of my PTSD - i incorrectly assigned them to anxiety/adhd. on the small scale, this can mean a longer journey to healing. on the larger scale, it can mean people with extremely difficult situations are unable to get the help they need.

please, if you can, and you're looking to self-diagnose: be careful about what you assume about yourself. try to keep an honest journal of what you're thinking/feeling/doing for a few days.

do not go in with an assumption. try to keep an open mind. i think we all "suspect" we have something - but like i said, i completely missed my own PTSD symptoms, because i suspected the ADHD the most, and only "saw" those symptoms.

do your own research. if the tiktok says "research shows", google that research. figure out who paid for that research. do further research related to that study - has it ever been repeated? is it peer reviewed? do other researchers seem to accept it as conclusive?

if you feel you really resonate with the materials of one person's experience with a condition, find other examples. see if you relate to other creators who identify similarly.

and please - please do not stop once you come to a conclusion. i fully believe that the diagnostic process should be seen as a first step, not a destination. by knowing what you might be struggling with, you gain an incredibly powerful tool on how to gain peace with that condition.

if you feel yourself emotionally respond to a tiktok/etc that suggests something that might be true about yourself, i'm glad you had that experience. but it's also important to not relax into the "easy" answer. interrogate it. start googling what else that could mean; what ways you could work on healing that wound.

healing does not "belong" to any one condition. i want you to begin to look into healing no matter if you have "proven" you have a condition or not. it is never selfish to practice responsible self-care. even if you don't relate to having adhd, you are not harming me by using adhd-inspired study tips. it is not making my condition worse for you to seek peace by asking for more time on tests. even if it was - the fault would be with the system, not in your need of something the system makes inaccessible.

remind yourself that everything you experience is real. and because it is real, it is complicated. while things might be related - even sometimes clearly related - a stranger on the internet cannot make that discernment for you. you as a person deserve the work, attention, and care that goes into the process of unravelling the harm that has been done to you.

it makes me very, very upset to see how popular these videos have become, because they're so irresponsible. and they clearly are targeting a vulnerable group. for example, making generalized claims about children of unloving caretakers is targeting those who have experienced neglect. there is no way to use 30 second videos to correctly analyze what that neglect might have caused in your adult life. i'm sorry, but it's snake oil.

i know it is so powerful soothing to recognize that you aren't broken. that others exist like you out there. i want every person looking for answers to find their answer. i want you to feel seen and heard and understood. i want you to find your community.

i just want it to happen safely.

#every time i write this im like #i just want to say a short thing about this #and every time it ends up being 12 pages long #but since it keeps happening #and i keep seeing shit like this...#this isn't even everything i feel about this #i hope this is clear like #what im saying is #NOT ''you don't have it if u selfdiagnose''#it's instead....#you might!!! just don't let 1 or 2 videos confirm it!!#also!!! don't assume that symptom A belongs to condition X!!#even as someone who did eventually get diagnosed like #i still find myself being like - oh that's my adhd #only to figure out 12 hours later. nope that was a panic attack #also none of those videos are about how to HELP the behavior #also this doesn't talk about getting a therapist eventually but please get professional help if you can #it took me fucking forever tho #what im saying is that in the meantime #u can heal now #this is too long im posting it on a sunday so nobody reads it

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raayllum · 4 months

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don't get me wrong callum is undeniably a prince and it plays into his family dynamics and his initial sense of unworthiness when the story starts a lot, but i'll never fully understand the hang up that it's a Big part of his ongoing story when his own brother, the king, says "remember who you are" and just refers and reiterates his mage identity (4x06), and that's the only one that callum seems to significantly care about either (5x07)

#tdp callum #like he's The Prince in arc 2 but only when it's Funny/Convenient for him to be at any given time #& y'know what good for him #tag ramble #like none of his arcs have ever been Informed by him being a prince since like. s1 #and i would not be surprised if by the end of the series he's not living in katolis #like Who Knows obviously. he totally could be #but like. he is very clearly a prince bc harrow & ezran Needed to be royal for Their Storylines #and callum being a 'step prince' was an easy allegory for 'you feel external pressures & like u don't fully belong in your family'#in a court dynamic #like i'd love a 'callum is acting king while ezran is off doing something else' i would eat that shit up #5x01 was a perfect opportunity. they Did Not do that and i think it's so funny #meanwhile ezran is The King and that's like. that's his arc y'know?

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yvesolade · 28 days

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#i had an awful time during my undergraduate degree #i was so depressed and so so unhappy #but went back for a five year reunion today #and I didn't really want to go but i went and i shouldn't have #someone was racist to my parents #and i spent the whole day surrounded by people who loved it there #and how do you be like . i don't feel safe here I never belonged here the psychological consequences of the years I spent here #will haunt me for the rest of my life?#and i can't even tell anyone any of this #because the friends i know from undergrad will be like :/ because they loved it and the fact i had a bad time makes them feel guilty #and the friend i have from outside is like #always anti ****** university #in a way that isn't helpful and doesn't make me feel good #so I'm just like. sad #i feel like im being punished for forgetting what it's like there

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