#someone whos art ive loved for years followed me today (a day or two before you're reading this) and im freaking the fuck out
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day 6
#dst art#dst wendy#dst abigail#dst webber#don't starve#i wanted to be cool and mysterious on this account without interacting with anyone#but#someone whos art ive loved for years followed me today (a day or two before you're reading this) and im freaking the fuck out#man#how is a dude supposed to keep up his unflappable persona in these conditions#should i make an actual main to follow people with#idk how tumblr works
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Holy shit...
heh... my birthday gift and my pet just died....
I got a tailless whip scorpion as a surprise pet for my birthday from my step mom and my father, I was really excited, not my first pet since a few months before around thanksgiving I got a tarantula that I named Super Nova, she is still alive... anyways. This scorpion I named Mr. Neptune (idk if it was a girl or boy but who cares anymore..).... yesterday he was doing just fine, walking around and doing whatever dumb shit they do in cages... then today in the morning he was sitting in the middle of his cage... i thought nothing of it.... after school, same pose, he was alive since he moved his jaws and sorta moved closer to the ground when i sprayed his cage (not explaining its a care thing for his species)... that was two hours ago... now almost three.... he was alive... and suddenly hes just dead! ive looked at 50 sites before caring for him, while caring for him, made sure over and over again i was doing the right thing! right humidity, tempature, food! everything was fine.... now hes gone and idk why.... why did he fucking die! i dont understand!.... he didnt even get his first molt with me.... he didnt even get to grow up fully... and somehow... super nova really is super and is still only gone through one tiny molt, still a baby, and trying to climb up a glass wall she cant... heh.... im not stopping any drawings... and im still starting commissions on monday... im just sad and things might be slow... thank you and i love all you guys, you guys are really the best fans, thank you to all my mutuals, thank you @rithiathemoth for being there for me the most, thank you for being my first mutual, your a great friend even though we dont even know each other in real life, only on tumblr... still, thanks to you all, mutuals, followers, people i follow who have liked or joined in on my group drawings, i get really really excited when you do....
And side note for my partner, who im on call with at this moment of writing this, thank you, for being with my stupid ass for 4 years, thank you so much for loving me like you do, i have never felt more loved by someone since my mom left me at 4... 4 years ago we met, and you helped me out of depression and almost killing myself, you helped me so much, more then you'll ever know, and i know we dont understand eachother as much as we should, but i love you so fucking much, and i want you by my side forever, your the reason i continued going, continued doing art, started violin, still trying to this fucking day in this fucked up unfair world, you really are the best, i love you so fucking much i really fucking do.....
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unbothered
a/n: another addition to so it goes! just little snippets of acts of service between jungkook and oc. this takes place over the first school year together. also, if you guys have any ideas for more drabbles, pls send them in! enjoy! warnings: mentions of food consumption, coffee consumption, hints at students family life.
series masterlist
i.
It's Friday, the end of the second week of school.
The past three days, Jungkook and you have been arriving at the same time. You'd wait for one another, catching up from the day before since you parted. He'd crack a joke about how he wasn't sure what tires him out more, his roommate's stupid shit or waking up early five days in a row.
Today, you're running twenty minutes behind; twenty-five minutes before school started.
Teeth brushed and face washed were your first two priorities this morning. You were able to throw your hair up into a messy updo; not having enough time for the full routine, only patting moisturizer into your skin. It would be enough to make it seem like you put some effort, right?
It's after you've parked, backpack hanging over your shoulder, tote bag hanging low from your hand, that you spot Jungkook's car and freeze.
Did you leave him waiting?
Clocked in, you make your way to drop off your belongings in your room as fast as you can. No one stops you in the hall, a small sigh of relief leaves you. Who knows how long Ms. Lee Ji-Wan, a second grade teacher who literally beams sunshine, would have kept you if she spotted you.
A moment, just a small moment you allow yourself. A moment where you're not rushing yourself, worried about being somewhere, in the comfort and stillness of your classroom. Hand rubbing your nape, head slowly rolling out to the side. Just a moment.
And it's not ruined, not when you hear three soft knocks on your door before sliding open.
Jungkook's head is poking in, his wide eyes searching the room before settling on you. His eyes quickly look you over before he allows himself in, door closing behind him.
"You didn't wait, did you?" is the first thing that comes out of your mouth, your hand moving down to rub your fingers against your collarbone.
"Not long, no," Jungkook reassures you, not staying still.
"Jungkook," you frown, reaching over to your desk for your coffee, that you realize you forgot when your fingers wrap around nothing, balling up into a loose fist.
"Here," Jungkook laughs, moving his hand from behind his back. An iced coffee.
Hands instantly clasping against your chest, big eyes and a hopeful tug of your eyebrows; your facial expression reading, "is that for me?" Jungkook laughs, holding the coffee out to you, shaking it to show you that it's real, and it's for you.
"I got here just before you, actually. I was in the mood for some expensive coffee and figured you'd like one, too," Jungkook explains, that smile never leaving his lips.
ii.
The end of a meeting is always such a relief.
The quiet, exciting buzz that comes with the meeting being called to it's end, almost like an exhale that relieves your body from the weights of the world for just that moment; weightless and carefree.
The chairs being pushed away so teachers could stand, the sound of shuffling paper and occasional crumple, quiet chatter while some people gathered together, others just making their way of the room. Talk of lunch plans, upcoming events (personal and 'professional').
That was feeling is what you look forward to at the start of every meeting.
It's the feeling you relish this moment. Tae-yeon rubs your forearm, telling you she'll see you after the day ends before rushing off to join Jae-eon, physical education teacher. You look after her, standing up, watching as the pair makes their way out of the room.
You turn back towards the center of the room, eyes scanning the room until you spot Jungkook.
Jungkook's not in the spot he deemed as his unassigned assigned seat during meetings, but at the front of the room, talking to the principal. His body language is animated; his papers on the chair closest to him, hands moving regardless of close they are to his body. You could see how his eyes widened and his tone came off as serious, passionate.
You can't help but watch. You can't help but wonder what he was so passionate about, what he was sharing with the principal.
You can't take your eyes away, not until they bow to each other and the principal is turning towards you, to make his way to the exit behind you. Quickly, you duck your head and a quiet wish leaves your lips, "have a good day, sir."
"You waited," Jungkook simply says, your head turning upwards and eyes automatically moving to his face.
"Yeah," you hum.
"You didn't have to," Jungkook reassures with a small smile, folding his small stack of papers in half and tucking it under his arm. He makes his way towards you, hand gesturing towards the door.
"Yeah, but I wanted to. We always go to lunch afterwards," you state.
"Oh," Jungkook falters behind you. He watches you make your way to the door, turning midway when you don't feel his presence.
"You wait for me," you shot back, a teasing look on your face.
"Yeah, because I haven't been sucked into a teacher's clique," Jungkook defends jokingly.
iii.
You're looking over the math worksheets from this morning, red pen in one hand, chopsticks handling japchae in other.
"This is DEAN" playlist on Spotify plays softly from your computer. You hum, in tune to the music and to the taste of the japchae that your roommate, Sana, made last night.
You don't hear the door open, your face down towards the container of noodles. Cheeks full and puffed out, you throw your head back, a quiet moan, eyes closed. God, you loved noodles.
"You okay?" Jungkook laughs, taking you by surprise.
Head lowering to look at him, your eyes are wide and don't bother chewing, just watching as Jungkook gets closer.
"I thought you had lunch plans," you struggled, slowly chewing and swallowing, repeating the process until your mouth becomes empty again.
Jungkook laughs again, reaching over to twist the cap off your bottle of juice open before handing it to you.
"Take it slow."
You wave him off, taking a sip, eyes looking him up and down.
"You didn't met up with your friend... Seokjin?" you ask curiously, hoping you got the name right.
"I did," Jungkook nods and taps his finger against your desk, "but Jin-hyung had something come up."
Your lips pout, brows furrowing, "Sorry. I know you were looking forward to it."
"It's fine, I know where he lives," Jungkook cackles, placing a small container in front of you, "but just as I promised..."
"Is this the cake he made last time?" You gasp hopefully, pulling yourself closer.
There's a glimmer in your eyes, it makes Jungkook laugh quietly, shoulders shaking and nose scrunching up as he nods.
"He gave me some extra after I mentioned that I shared it with a friend from work," Jungkook smiles, popping the lid open.
What you didn't know about Jungkook that his hyung(s) did was that Jungkook only shared food with people he really cared about.
iv.
Since the days Jungkook and you used to just magically show up at the same time to school and wait for each other so that you could enter the building together (neither you or Jungkook know that the other peeked at the time when they realized that arrive at that time, thus the new addition to their daily routines), you've both had the other's phone number.
First, texts were exchanged when one of you decided to go for a coffee run, always asking the other if they wanted something.
Then came the texts to tell the other that you were running late (you showed up ten minutes before the school day started just to find that someone turned on your computer).
Following that were the texts that came in the evening. The "what was the name of the website that you those pens?," "what was the dish you mentioned Namjoon made for dinner?," the "I have roommate cake and coffee tomorrow morning!!!"
You remember the first time Jungkook took a sick day, after the winter break, after you'd deemed yourselves friends and not just coworkers.
You're in the teacher's lounge, lips hovering over your water bottle. You're pretending to pay attention to your phone, thumb scrolling against the screen as if you're on social media, but in reality, you had your conversation with Jungkook opened. Subtly trying to type out everything you were hearing in the teacher's lounge.
"before you call me a child, I just have to say... you chose the wrong day to be absent, mr. jeon."
Jeon Jungkook: what is this? are we fourteen? are you trying to get me to wonder what the day is like without me?
You scoff to yourself, trying to bite back a smile.
Jeon Jungkook: when I woke up again this morning, it was already 10am, and the first thing that popped into my head was that it was two hours into the school day and math is almost over.
A laugh leaves your lips, the noise from the nearby teachers becoming quiet as they looked over at you.
Eventually, your texts ranged throughout the entire day. From the morning texts asking if the other wants coffee, texts swapping recipes in the late afternoon, to just asking about weekend plans and just...talking to one another.
v.
"I'll have you know, Jeon Jungkook, that my Saturdays are sacred," you gushed, waggling your finger jokingly.
Jungkook snorts, pushing the cart past you, leaving you standing there. He throws a quick glance over his shoulder at you, rolling his eyes with a smile on his face.
"No one forced you to tag along," Jungkook points out.
"You're right. But, you also know that I cannot and will not turn down a lunch invitation," you sigh dramatically.
"Ah, so when you see my face, you see a money bag?"
"Didn't you hear? The way to someone's heart is through their stomach," you sigh, hand over your chest, walking closer to where Jungkook's stopped.
Jungkook's looking at things that he can gift the students in the after school art club. You both had already gotten little gifts for your respective classes, but Jungkook had told you that he wanted to give his art kids some supplies so that they'd be encouraged to keep doing art; supplies that parents couldn't afford or in some cases, didn't want to purchase.
"I have three students who go to high school next year," Jungkook murmurs to himself, scratching the back of his neck, "but I don't want the rest of them to think I don't care about them."
"What were you planning on getting for them?" you ask gingerly, hands running over the different sketchbook covers.
"Taehyung was able to get some good quality mixed media sketch books from the art museum. They hold workshops every week and he found some extras," Jungkook turns to look at you, a hint of a soft smile, "so I was thinking a basic watercolor set, some pencils, color pencils?"
"Mmm, maybe leave the water colors for the ones going to high school? Not that you don't trust the younger ones, but water colors seems like some more responsibility," you comment.
Jungkook hums back in acknowledgement, moving to stand next to you. The hairs on the back of your neck stand at his proximity, your heart racing when you catch his scent.
"You added erasers and sharpeners?"
"Pencil set."
"Hmm," your eyes scanning down the aisle. You spot chalk hanging at the end of the aisle, hand reaching out to pat Jungkook's bicep before quickly moving down the aisle. Adjusting your bag onto your shoulder, you dramatically gesture towards the various packs of chalk.
"Not only can they make art in their sketch books, but out in the neighborhood," you try telling it to him like a salesman at a car dealership, "art that can be remade, reworked. Sidewalks, driveways, whatever!"
Jungkook can't fight off the laugh as he doubles over, his laugh echoing around him.
His laugh is contagious, it might be your favorite sound. It has you breaking character, your laugh joining his; a symphony that could bring crowds together, one that people never wanted to stop hearing.
"What? It's not good?" you defend yourself through giggles.
"Did I say something?" Jungkook chuckles, pushing the cart towards you, carefully placing several packs of chalk in.
"Did I win myself some dessert?" you turn away to peek at the other aisles.
"That already came included with the lunch offer. You, my friend, have won yourself something even better."
You realize Jungkook's movement until you hear his voice right in your ear.
"You get to pick one thing from the store and I'll buy it for you."
You shiver, stepping away from him, overwhelmed. You try to brush off the way the back your neck heats up, your heart beats a little faster, your hands get a little clammy. Just a moment to compose yourself, yet, a moment becomes too long when the hairs on the back of your neck fall back down and his scent is no longer surrounding you.
You look up with wide eyes, watching Jungkook make his way into the aisle that had "acrylic and oil points" written at the top.
"Wait!" You call out, trying to catch up to him, "you can't judge what I pick!"
tagging: @yslkook
#jungkook x reader#jungkook x oc#jeon jungkook x reader#jeon jungkook x oc#jungkook fluff#jungkook imagine#so it goes
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Everything else is just the weather
Book: Open Heart
Pairing: Dr Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Dr Noelle Valentine)
Word Count: ~5.3k (I sinned!)
Summary: Ethan takes Elle out on their “first” date.
Category: Fluff
Warnings: None
A/N: It has literally taken me ages to finish this fic. To the point that I couldn’t look at it anymore, but here it is. I had it in mind for a really long time and now that OH is back, I feel like I’m ready to show it to the world. As always thank you for your support and I hope you like it!
This fic is part 2 of birthday present for my friend, part 1 is the fan art which you can see here. Once you read the fic, the fan art makes more sense :)
This is my submission for CFWC Silly Love Stories, Day 12: Date night.
Loud knocks resonated throughout the room.
"Come in!"
"Good morning, Mrs. Peterson.”
“Good morning, Dr Valentine. I think you are the only doctor in this hospital with some sort of manners, everyone else just waltzes in here as if it was a damn barn!”
“Hospital or no hospital, everyone has their right to privacy.”
“Thank you, child. Once again, please call me Faye."
"Alright Faye, but only if you call me Elle.” She smiled sweetly, and the whole room seemed to be suddenly lit by a thousand suns.
“How are you feeling? Are the meds making a difference?"
"They are. I am ready to be discharged today.”
"Not so fast. I am not ready to say goodbye to you yet."
“Why would you possibly like to be lumbered with an old nuisance like me for even a second longer than necessary?”
Elle just laughed and shook her head. The ‘nuisance’, as the elderly lady so lovingly put it, was exactly what she loved about her job. She loved spending time with her patients, she loved their stories and their worldly wisdom. It made her sad to see how many of them thought they didn’t matter or considered themselves and their lives boring. To her, they were anything but.
Many of Edenbrook’s staff members kept asking themselves: what is it about her? She was a great doctor, no two ways about it, and she was a genuinely nice person. But what was the source of power she had over people? If she woke up one day and decided to start a rebellion, patients would have most certainly followed her, even if it meant they’d be leaving the premises of the hospital with naked butts or trailing their IVs behind them. Doctors, nurses, administration, cleaners and security would follow shortly. She only had to say a word.
And how on Earth was she capable of turning Dr Ramsey, the grizzly bear of Edenbrook, into a benign teddy bear with as little as one look? It was beyond everyone’s apprehension.
Had they spent more time actually observing her, rather than gossiping in the corners, the answer would have unveiled in front of them within minutes.
It was very simple.
Noelle was truly curious about people. She genuinely liked them and was determined to get to know their story, for it helped her diagnose them faster and also satiated the young doctor’s hunger for knowledge.
Patients never felt like “curious cases” or “numbers” in her presence. They were… themselves - people with hopes, dreams, fears, pet peeves and odd habits. They were human.
So little and yet so much.
Those never touched by serious illnesses often failed to understand that sickness strips you of your dignity and becomes your identity. Your true self becomes covered by this weird, annoying sticker that wouldn’t come off no matter how hard you tried to remove it.
But this young woman, despite the nature of her profession, somehow managed to notice what was hiding beneath this misleading layer.
Had all these gossipers spoken to her patients, that’s exactly what they would have heard.
"What's happening today?" The older lady asked with a flick of curiosity in her wrinkle-haloed eyes.
"What do you mean, Faye?" The young doctor sounded genuinely baffled by the out-of-the-blue question.
"Well, I am no diagnostician, but I believe I am rather observant and you radiate with happiness. Something special is happening today, am I right?"
"Yeah, you are right." Elle blushed like a teenager caught in a lie. "My boyfriend is taking me on a surprise date today, but he won’t say a word about it, so I'm super excited to find out what he planned for us. He usually isn't one for romantic gestures, so the secrecy is killing me."
"Do you think he's gonna pop the big question?" Faye’s eyes lit up with excitement.
"No, we're not there...yet." Elle faked a smile, but a tone of doubt and sadness coloured her voice. They probably never will be, those things weren’t in the cards for Ethan, as he already stressed once.
But once was enough and she didn’t dare mention the subject again.
"Well, I'm pretty sure he's got some big guns in store, I would if I had a lady like you." - a male patient lying in the bed adjacent to Elle’s patient added smiling flirtatiously.
"Jerry, you were supposed to focus on getting better, not stealing my girlfriend." They all jumped when a deep baritone echoed throughout the room, hitting present company like a wrecking ball. She must have left the door ajar or Ethan could penetrate the walls soundlessly, because no one heard him coming.
Exactly how long has he been standing there for and how much did he hear?
"Dr. Ramsey, flirting makes your blood flow faster. Isn't it the very definition of life itself?” Jerry’s tone was brisk and lively.
"Well, it definitely isn't the definition of recovery after a heart attack." Ethan used his authoritative doctor’s voice but knew this wasn't a battle he was going to win. Jerry had something he didn't: a couple more decades of life experience under his belt and even the best medical school in the country couldn’t compete with this.
"Besides, Dr. Ramsey, I don't think that the beautiful Dr. Valentine here fancies old farts like me."
"That's where you are wrong, Jerry, looks like this is exactly the type I fancy." The two women laughed, however Ethan was far from amused. "Dr. Ramsey is 10 years older than me."
"10 years? What is 10 years in these times? Nothing. When I was getting married 40 years ago, it was something. But today? Look at all them playboys with girls younger than my granddaughter. 10 years is actually a very healthy difference. Men are immature and slower with growing up emotionally. So I'd say you've caught up, Dr. Ramsey, and the two of you are emotional peers now.”
“Thank you for the fascinating lesson in human psychology, Jerry. To think I’ve wasted all this time and money on medical school and no one taught me this.”
“Dr. Ramsey, it’s because schools and useful knowledge are mutually exclusive.”
Elle and Faye were on the verge of bursting out in laughter, but managed to keep their composure and used the non-verbal communication of exchanging glances instead.
Once they made sure their patients had everything they need, Ethan and Elle wished them a good day and promised to stop by in 2 days, as the following day was their day off.
The moment the door closed behind them, Ethan crossed his arms on his chest.
"I lose you from my sight for one second and this happens. 5 more minutes with Jerry and I'd be single again."
"At least no one wants to poke your eyes out for being with me."
"And someone wants to poke yours?"
"Where do I start... nurses, who had a crush on you long before I even set foot in Edenbrook? Female interns? Anyone, who has a pair of functioning eyes and ever looked at you?"
She was adorable when she was doing this, her whole body overtaken by excitement and her hands waving. When she was talking about something really important to her she wasn't just conversing with her mouth, she was doing it with her whole body.
Suddenly, his pager painfully reminded Ethan that this was neither the place nor the time to lose himself in adoration.
"I need to go, I'm completely swamped today and I have my favourite cherry-on-top board meeting. In case I don't see you for the rest of your shift - I’ll pick you up at 7."
He was gone before she was able to form a response. Was it just her or was Dr Ramsey weirdly… nervous?
* * * * * * * *
At 7pm sharp, Ethan Ramsey curled his palm in a fist and gently knocked. The door opened in an instant, as if someone knew he'd been standing there for the past few minutes.
"Ethan! I mean Dr. Ramsey...please come in!" Sienna squeaked with nervous excitement as she let him in.
"Outside of Edenbrook Ethan is just fine, Sienna. If you don't mind me calling you by your first name, of course."
"Mm..mme? No, yes, I mean... Elle is on the balcony." She tried to hide her embarrassment and motioned towards the tall windows surrounding the living room. Some time ago, he would have been oddly proud to have such an intimidating effect on people - nowadays, more than anything, he was amused. Has he really changed so much?
The answer to his question was leaning against the railing, glass of wine in her hand. Gauzy, flowery dress enveloped her frame and tanned skin.
For Ethan, it was as clear as crystal: summer had the face and scent of Noelle Valentine.
Long before she started leaving her toothbrush in his apartment and sleeping in his old JH t-shirts, Ethan noticed that whenever he laid eyes on her, his whole body started acting in a very irrational way. His doctor’s instincts prompted him to think of all types of biological causes and chemical reactions in the brain. Then, when he sort of admitted to himself it’s not just pure science, Ethan leaned towards the forbidden fruit theory - the more he couldn’t have his drug, the more he was craving it.
But the feeling never disappeared. Whenever he wouldn’t see her for a while - be that an hour, a day, or just when she went to take a shower or make a coffee - the very moment her face came into his view again, he felt his stomach somersaulting.
Every. Single. Time.
It wasn’t any different now.
"Drinking without me?"
She almost dropped the glass when his voice stopped the train of thought in her head. But then she saw his face, the way too seldom relaxed muscles and a barely-there smile.
A perfectly tailored shirt clung to his torso marvellously. If not in medicine, he surely would have made a name for himself in the fashion industry. Fortunately for her, the idea never crossed his mind.
The warm wind blew in her face, carrying the scent of expensive cologne which overwhelmed her nostrils. She didn’t know this one, so it must have been new. But she did know that smelling it for the whole evening while staring at his handsome face will be a pure torture.
Simply put, she was a goner.
"I don't know why, but I was quite nervous. Had to summon the courage somehow.”
“As you should be. After all, it's not every day that one goes on their first date."
She looked at him as if she’d just been told that a UFO landed on the roof.
“On a what?”
"Well, I was thinking a lot lately about how we never had a first date. Nothing was ever...typical with us. I promised myself I will do my best to fix things that caused you pain or deprived you of the things you deserved. Maybe I cannot fix some immediately, but this one I can, so I will."
Her eyes, overbrimming with affection struck him like thousand lightnings. Thank god a comfortable silence fell between them - had she asked him a question, it would have been clear that right now he is nothing but a simpering moron.
With this in mind, he took his hands from behind his back, holding a small bouquet of pink gerberas.
"These are my favourites." Her face instantly illuminated at the well known sight and smell. "How did you know?”
"I had some amazing helpers."
Elle instantly turned her head left and looked inside, where grinning, Sienna was showing her the thumbs up.
"Wow, now I actually wish I'd downed the whole bottle."
"I'm glad you didn't. I want to go on a date with a woman, not her lifeless body, even though the body itself is very appealing. Shall we?”
“King of compliments…”
* * * * * * * *
"You actually look like you are having a good time, Dr Ramsey.”
"Why wouldn't I? There is alcohol, sitting under the sky definitely has its charm and the company is acceptable." She playfully swatted his arm, the gesture a quick reminder of how comfortable they felt with each other, something he constantly remembered to never take for granted.
“Although I love this, I still don’t understand why you dragged me all the way outside Boston, I’m pretty sure the rooftop bars are pretty acceptable there, too. A bit more crowded though, that’s for sure.”
“Are you complaining about the fact that we have this entire place to ourselves? I know the owner and he was indebted to me.”
“Of course he was.” Looks like the whole town is indebted to Ethan freakin’ Ramsey.
“With regards to why I brought you here… you’ll just have to wait and see.”
Gosh. She couldn’t decide whether the mysterious side of Ethan Ramsey was hot as hell or annoying as hell. But she didn’t really have time to contemplate, because her companion asked her a question.
“Why did you become a doctor?” The ocean eyes pierced her to the core and she had a feeling that even if she was the best actress in the world, there was no way she’d be able to hide something from this man.
“That’s a terrible change of subject. Also, I must have told you like a million times already.”
“No, you never told me.”
When she looked at him and really, really thought about it… she suddenly realised Ethan was right. Elle told the story so many times she sort of… assumed she told Ethan, too.
“Are you sure you want to hear it today? It’s a pretty sad story, a mood killer I’d say.”
“It’s what makes you you, so yes, I want to hear all about it - the good, the bad and the indifferent.”
“I’ll tell you, but I need to ask something first. Why now? We’ve known each other for a while and you just… I just sort of assumed this isn’t the type of conversation you’d like to hold.”
“You’ve hit the nail on the head.” Ethan’s expression was gentle, not a hint of irony in his voice. “I’ve known you for a while now, but there are still so many things about you that I don’t know. At first, I didn’t want to ask, because asking these questions meant admitting that there is something more between us. What a fail would that be, after I’ve mastered the art of denial.” He laughed, but it wasn’t a bitter or a nervous laugh, it was a genuine banter between them, as the British half of her soul liked to call it. “But you made me want to dig deeper.”
Was it the heat that made her catch her breath, or did it have nothing to do with the temperature?
“Plus, this is sort of what first dates are for, right? I’m sorry for skipping right to the more complex questions. It’s not that I don’t want to know what you were afraid of as a child, I want to know all the details… but it feels like the atmosphere calls for something…bigger.”
So she told him all about her friend, how she fell ill, how she couldn’t be saved and how the experience wreaked havoc on her whole life, tears glistening in her eyes at the mere memory of the events that shaped who she was today.
Ethan listened, his whole body tense and eyes transfixed. She was giving him one of the most fragile parts of her and he had to make sure his hands were there to catch, carry and care for this treasure.
“And that’s when I realised that if I focused on becoming the best doctor I could be, then maybe one day, I’d be that person who has an answer, who can solve a mystery and save a relationship that means the world to someone. Sometimes, people don’t realise that when a person dies, it’s not only them that’s gone. The part of someone who stays, who has to deal with the whole ‘me after you’ - that part is gone, too. So for me, in a way, this meant saving more than one life.”
For a couple of seconds he didn’t move. Then, without saying a single word and with an unreadable expression he got up and offered her a hand, which she silently accepted. He led her to the railing, where the sun was slowly sinking into the boundless waters of Quincy Bay.
His lips found the all too well known way to her forehead, placing a loving kiss on her delicate skin.
“I am so proud of you.” There was something so mesmerising in his whisper, sending a shiver down her spine.
“As a mentor or as a boyfriend?”
“Both. I want you to know that your dedication to people who rely on you is astounding and hardly present in doctors your age. Or any age, for that matter.”
“Wow, Dr Ramsey, smooth. Trying to hit on me with a recycled pick-up line used on a national TV? No wonder you didn’t have too many girlfriends.”
“No, I didn’t. But I believe everyone has a limit of luck they can get per life. And looking at you, I got a couple of lifetimes worth of luck.”
This was enough to render her speechless. She smiled and at this very moment he knew he would do anything to make her smile like this. She wrapped him around her pinky finger and suddenly his whole existence revolved around finding ways of seeing her curve these breathtaking lips as often as possible and making sure he is the reason she smiles… not crying her eyes out.
Although the other didn’t know, because none of them said it out loud, they both thought the same thing.
This feels so right.
There isn’t a hint of awkwardness in the fact that they can go from being serious or emotionally vulnerable to funny and teasing in seconds.
In one effortless movement, Ethan spun her and pressed her back against his chest. Then, he started placing a series of tender kisses along her jawline and the crook of her neck, slowly moving towards her shoulder.
Come on, just say it Ramsey. It doesn’t get any better than this.
He wrapped her palm in his and pointed them towards the sky.
“There they are - the Little Dipper and the Big Dipper.” Their intertwined fingers were jumping from one tiny flashing point to the other, as if they were playing connect the dots. “And that’s Orion’s Belt.”
“I really don’t get why at this point I’m still surprised that you’re good at everything.”
Elle was drunk on his every word, as this annoying trait of Ethan Ramsey being the know-it-all was actually one of her favourite things about him.
As for Ethan, he couldn’t help but think that life wasn’t perfect and was never going to be. But this - this moment - it was in fact perfect. Why take chances of ruining it, when so many things can go wrong?
What if she doesn't say it back?
What if she's just gonna laugh at him or tell him he had it all wrong.
What if he misinterpreted everything and she never thought about him this way?
He was terrified of being this exposed. The last person he loved so much left him without batting an eyelid and disappeared for 25 fucking years.
Maybe it was better to live in a perfect illusion than a reality in which there was even a 0.01% chance she doesn't love him back.
So they both drowned in the moment, drifted in the sea of rapture, lost in the illusion that it can all last forever.
It was her who broke the silence.
“I’m getting a bit cold, is it ok if we call it a night?”
“Right, of course.”
“Thank you for the first date, I loved it.”
Handing her his jacket (her favourite, the dark green leather one) Ethan was furious at himself.
Maybe he was broken. Maybe he will remain broken forever. Maybe that’s the way it must be.
“Do you want to spend the night at mine?” The question slipped his tongue before he was able to fully reflect on it.
“At yours? Unless you have some secret place I don’t know about, just a quick reminder - I live there too.”
“Since this was our first date, I thought it was a gentlemanly thing to ask.”
“In that case… I am afraid I have the ‘after the 3rd date’ sleepover rule, Dr Ramsey.”
* * * * * * * *
The morning came all too soon and the hot, ruthless rays of the rising sun announced that Ethan is now way past his regular wake up and get up time. He barely slept, tossing and turning, replaying every second of the evening in his head.
His hand mindlessly reached for what he hoped to be the familiar curves and softness of the body he adored so much.
But his palm hit the mattress with a loud thud. The bed was empty.
The all-too-well known feeling of hopelessness slipped into the doctor's mind with ease. What did he expect? He was acting weird the previous day. First date, what a stupid idea. She must have realised something is wrong with him and finally left.
But before he was able to fully wallow in the mud of pity, the feeling was soon replaced by an old friend Ethan haven’t heard from for a long time.
Panic.
Where was she? Is she ok? What if something happened to her and he was just sleeping like a log instead of being there to protect her. He couldn’t stand the thought of losing her… again. Something grabbed his chest in a tight grip and wouldn’t let go.
Scenes flashed before his eyes, vivid and bright. Their hands touching through the glass wall. Her hand cupping his cheek through the layer of hazmat suit.
He got out of bed at the speed of sound and started running around the apartment, but she was nowhere to be seen.
Suddenly, he noticed.
The balcony door was opened wide.
Shit.
Heart in his mouth, Ethan crossed the distance between his kitchen island and the balcony door in the blink of an eye.
Elle was just serving pancakes outside. The goddamn pancakes. The only thing he couldn’t cook. The one thing she kept teasing him about and he rolled his eyes every time she did.
God, he promised himself he will never learn how to make them, if it meant she would just tease him forever.
She was smiling as widely as ever, putting the sun and everything else in the world to shame. Ethan was still a bit shaken and his uneven breathing gave him away. Elle finally noticed his presence.
“Good morning, I was just about to—“
“I love you.”
“I love you too.”
They both froze.
The tension in the silence that had just set in was so thick you could cut it with a knife.
But the silence didn’t last long. As one man, with eyes full of disbelief, they both murmured simultaneously:
“What did you just say?”
This time, he felt obliged to break the silence.
"I...I...I mean, I…"
Damn it, get it together, idiot.
"I didn't mean to…”
Great, Ramsey, keep digging an even deeper hole for yourself, then crawl in and stay there forever.
"You didn't mean to say it?”
"Yes. No. I mean, damn it, I am making things worse, aren't I?”
She didn’t set him straight.
"The thing is, I wanted to say it yesterday. I had it all planned, I took you for a first date and I wanted to say it for the first time yesterday.”
"Why did it have to be yesterday?”
“Give me a minute.”
She just rolled her eyes, but Ethan didn’t have a chance to notice before disappearing inside. A few moments later he re-emerged, his face and torso covered by a neatly wrapped, rectangle-shaped object.
"What's this?"
"Something you should have unpacked yesterday, but then... life happened."
Elle sat down on cold tiles, her hands trembling with a mix of fear and excitement. And just like he did months ago, he took her hand in his, only this time he cupped his own cheek with her palm and placed the most tender kiss on the inside of her hand.
It was her favourite medicine, a remedy for all things wrong.
He sat beside her and nodded at the mysterious package. With impatience growing inside of her, Elle has torn the paper up.
Inside was a dark blue, framed print - the colour of it an instant reminder of her favourite set of irises.
She studied everything with intent. A circle must have been representing the earth and the irregular dots and lines must have been the stars and constellations.
"A map of the sky? That's beautiful, Ethan."
He knew immediately that although her delight was sincere, she had absolutely no clue what she was looking at and why she was looking at it.
“It's not just any map of the sky.” Ethan explained gently, hints of pride colouring his voice. “It's a map of the Boston sky from exactly a year ago. Well, a year and a day.” He smiled faintly, now a shade of sorrow in his enchanting voice.
Silence. Was she supposed to know what that meant?
“Aren’t you full of mysteries today? Ok, you need to throw me a lifebelt here. What's so special about the sky from a year and a day ago?”
“For the world? Probably not too much. For me? Everything.”
At this stage of their relationship, she knew a lot about Ethan’s behaviours, triggers, his body language. And not just a relationship as a couple, but also everything that came before Ethan became someone she was running through life with (the life of two doctors in one of the busiest and most prestigious hospitals was certainly not a walk in the park).
But it still fascinated her how his demeanour changed whenever the subject was serious, whenever he was talking about something that truly mattered to him. It was as if he’d stripped down of all the layers and let her look into his bare soul. These rare moments of vulnerable intimacy meant more to her than any night of passion they ever shared.
Her eyes turned to him in pledge, because as much as she wanted to, Dr Valentine still couldn’t fully comprehend the scene unraveling in front of her.
“Read the description below the map.”
Dear God, did she actually hear shyness in his voice?
She skimmed through the image again, and there it was, right at the bottom. Elle was so focused on trying to decipher the meaning of the image that she didn’t notice the words below.
The words which explained everything.
I WILL NEVER FORGET THE DAY
THAT MADE ME REALISE
YOU ARE THE SKY
EVERYTHING ELSE IS JUST THE WEATHER
Her emerald eyes brimmed with hot tears as the meaning dawned upon her. Words were very unnecessary, but now that he summoned the courage to speak, there was still a lot he wanted to put into words. He gently took the frame from her hands and leaned it securely against the wall.
Taking her palms into his, he placed delicate kisses on her knuckles, his lips tracing the shape of these two tiny hands, which held all of him. Everything he had, everything he was and was going to be, he placed in those two fragile palms, with an unspoken hope that they will hold him and catch him if he falls.
“Look at me.” The words were pulsing with care and affection, even though his voice coloured them in serious and desperate shades.
“One year ago… and a day from today…” He smiled and she felt the warmth spilling inside of her. The power he had over her was beyond the limits of understanding.
Little did she know that the object of her affection was lost in the same thought.
“I was standing exactly where we stand right now. It was dark and the view wasn’t that spectacular.” He freed one of his hands, but only to make contact with her cheek to caress it slowly. In this moment, he had to touch her any way that he could. With his hands. With his eyes. With his soul.
“But I always found comfort in staring at the sky. When I was at med school, I had countless moments of doubt, I wanted to quit more times than I can count. So I used to go to a secluded place at night and stare at the sky. It made me realise how, in one respect, I am just a grain of sand in the universe and how little my problems are. Funnily enough, this thought actually brought me a sense of comfort. If I am as little as I think I am, then what is the harm in being brave and taking chances? A wise man once said… There are some things that are worth any risk.”
She giggled through the tears, the sweet sound soothing his shattered nerves.
“I was standing right here and I never felt more miserable in my life. And I couldn’t understand why, for God’s sake. I was thriving at work. I had everything figured out and planned. I was pushing you to be the best you could be and I watched you turn into someone who would one day be far greater than me. But you looked so sad, so… broken. You already know I can’t just gloss over you feeling down. The sadder you were, the more miserable I felt. One evening, I was having a glass of scotch and I remembered some tiny exchange we’ve had earlier in the day, literally a chit chat. No idea what it was about. But I remembered your smile and your laugh. Every tiniest move of your muscles, your eyes, how your hair set around your face. It made me happy. Even if it was just for 5 minutes, knowing that you are happy in that very moment filled my chest with lightness. That’s when I realised I want to be the person who makes you feel this way.”
She blinked the first time in a while, as if she was afraid to make the tiniest movement, afraid it will all disappear and turn out to be a dream. Giant teardrops rolled down her angelic face, trailing the path of joy.
“Noelle Sky Valentine, I love you. I have loved you for a long time but I was too stubborn to let myself give in. And that, as you already know, will always be one of my biggest regrets.”
“Ethan, I don’t… I’m so sorry, I just don’t know what to say.” Her voice was saturated with emotions.
“I’d be lying if I said this wasn’t the reaction I was hoping for.“
“I love you too, Ethan Jonah Ramsey. You are by far the most complicated and stubborn person I have ever met. You are… everything I never knew I looked for in another human being.”
Once he heard her say it back, he couldn't get enough of it and a lifetime didn't feel like enough to tell her he loves her, as many times as he wished to.
“But I do have to mention this, Dr Ramsey… from the first date to a love confession in less than 24 hours? I’m sorry, I think this is moving too fast.”
“I’ll show you too fast…but I’m afraid we need to get inside, I don’t want the whole world and its wife to see how I teach you a thing or two.”
Ethan scooped her in his arms and carried her inside, despite her mock protests. He smiled and corrected himself.
He wanted for the whole world to see.
Because the whole world was right there.
In his arms.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
If you’ve gotten this far, I need you to know you are absolutely amazing 💗
Tag 🏷 list: @jamespotterthefirst @romewritingshop @romereadingshop @genevievemd @starrystarrytrouble @terrm9 @mrs-ramsey @maurine07 @gryffindordaughterofathena @mercury84choices @lovingramsey @qrkowna @openheartfanfics @choicesficwriterscreations @lisha1valecha @oldminniemcg @iemcpbchoices @tsrookie @fayeswiftie @levinsdowneyy @brooks-eden @poudredevie @queencarb @caseyvalentineramsey @lucy-268 @tenaciousdeputydreamfriend @alwaysmychoices-sideblog @whippedforethanfreakingramsey @schnitzelbutterfingers @the-pale-goddess @lem-20 @wingedhairstylemusicweasel @liaromancewriter @ohchoices @archxxronrookie
#ethan ramsey x mc#ethan x mc#dr ethan ramsey#play choices#open heart#open heart fic#cfwc silly love stories#choices fic writers creations#fics of the week#ethan ramsey
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Bad Timing IV
A/N: To all the soft hearted crybabies requesting it: here’s part 4 to dry your tears from part 3. Thanks for all the interaction with this series, you guys are the best! <3<3<3<3
Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4
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I take my coffee to the little patio in the backyard of my childhood home, breathing deeply. It was a couple weeks since the traumatic incident at the bank, the one where I nearly died and found a way to live again. The higher ups practically begged me to take paid leave, I had a feeling they just didn’t want me to take anything to court. I’d told them I would take the month, and knew I would hand in my resignation thereafter. I enjoyed my job as much as the next person but it was too much for me. It felt like closing a door on a chapter of my life that I wanted to move on from.
And now, I could truly relax, I wasn’t running away from anything for the first time in my life. After everything that happened in that small restroom at the back of the bank, Harry and I came to a peace. And I’d only moved on from there.
“You’re up early,” my dad comes into view, a cup of tea in hand. “Your flight doesn’t leave until tonight right?”
“Yeah, just thought I would appreciate the views before I go back to a city,” I move my feet off the chair so he could sit.
“You can come here anytime.”
“I know,” I wrap my hands around my mug. “Coming here it just...reminds me of mum. And it’s hard...”
“This is how I stay connected to her,” he pats the table between us. “She loved this place, her garden and those darn birds she fed all the time.”
“You feed them now,” I look to the birdfeeder filled lovingly to the brim with seeds.
“I do it because...” he says quietly. “It’s what she would want.”
I think about my mum, what she would want. It hurt when I thought about how she left me, married and happy in love. And then how much hurt I went through, always wishing she was there. In some way I know she knew--wherever she was. But I wish I could hear her, I wish I could have a love like she had.
“So, when do I get to meet this new boy of yours?” My dad asks.
“Dad, you know his name’s Alec.”
“I would if I met him, put a face to the name.”
I roll my eyes, my dad was a bit overprotective after everything that’s happened in my life. I think he felt guilty in a small way, him and Harry always got on--we teased them about their bromance. He was just as blindsided as me. But I’d told my dad everything that happened the first night I came over. He hadn’t judged, just listened, hugged me tightly, and left to make me a cup of tea. That was the most expressive my dad got.
After Alec took me back from from the hospital, I asked him to stay. And he had stayed since, making it official from casual to dating. It was scary but life was too short to hold back I had learned. I had to hold onto a good thing when I had one.
As for Harry, he hadn’t called me since that day he visited me. I’d left him a couple texts--when I was discharged home, and again to ask him how he was doing a week later. He’d sent a thumbs up and that was it. I thought we were okay, but he blew me off even when I tried to call him. It hurt a little, but I’d been so busy packing and getting on, that I let him be for now. I would wait until after visiting my sister to find out where his head was at.
H’s POV
It’s been nearly a month since I walked out of Y/N’s hospital room, and we’d just about tied all the lose ends from the case. The only thing about it all that lingered on my mind was Y/N. I missed her more than I had all these years apart, but I sat in the ache of wanting. It was time I catch up to the consequences of my past actions. I turned to writing, starting again after years of thinking I no longer had a passion for it. It felt freeing.
She’d texted me, called me too. I tried not to respond even though everything in me wanted to pick up the phone and ask her out to dinner, invite her over for a movie, ask her if she wanted to take my car and drive out somewhere like we used to after exams in uni. But I let her be, imagining that she was happy somewhere. With Alec, or whoever she wanted to be with.
The last thing I expect, is for her to be standing outside my station late Thursday night.
“Y/N?” I almost don’t recognise her. Gone was her stern bun and smart suit. Strands of her hair frame her face, like a piece of art on display. She has on a loose jumper and tights, a bum bag strapped across her chest that she roots through for something.
“Harry!” she drops her hands. “I’ve only been waiting here for...20 minutes, when your receptionist said your shift ended?”
“I had to finish up some paperwork. Why didn’t you call me?.”
“It’s not like you would’ve answered.” her hands on her hips, attitude dripping from every inch of her. “You’ve been avoiding me.”
“You look different,” I dodge the topic.
“I know,” she zips up her bag. “I had the month off, officially resigned today. I have absolutely nowhere to be. So I’m looking the part.”
“It looks good,” I say truthfully. She looked relaxed, like the Y/N I used to know. “You quit your job?”
“I had enough of that bank,” she shrugs. “I went to see my dad for a bit, and visited my sister. She’s doing well.”
“Ah,” I was glad she’d taken a break. She was glowing. “Seriously Y/N, you look really good.”
“You,” she points her finger at me. “Are not allowed to say things like that after ghosting me. I thought we...came to an understanding. You left me again.”
I open my mouth to say something, but her words hit me. She was right, I’d left her again. Fuck.
“Yeah,” she crosses her arms when I go speechless. “You admitted to your mistakes, apologized, and then left me. How do you think that’s made me feel?”
“I thought it was best if I left you alone,” I walk out of the way from the entrance and she follows me to my car, parked in the lot. “I just wanted to give you space--a chance at being happy.”
She scoffs, leaning against the driver’s side door. “Thought it was best for who, Harry? Who are you to define my happiness? It would’ve been nice just to hear you were doing okay!”
“I’m sorry!” I stumble for another excuse but I come up with none. “The truth is, seeing you with Alec that day I...it was hard for me. I couldn’t be around you like that.”
“What’s that mean?”
“I...” I look at her, looking at me expectantly. She was a woman with an agenda, she had come here looking for answers and wasn’t going to leave until I gave them to her. “I want you to be happy, all that shite. You can’t do that with me around. And it’s hard for me seeing you with someone else...I can’t stand to be in your life like that. Where I’m just...your ex.”
“So you’re saying, it took me nearly dying for you to realize?” Her eyebrow quirks up.
“In a way,” I huff. “It just, took me being around you to remember what I left, when we ended things. It also made me realize the mess I left behind-”
“Don’t you dare feel sorry for yourself,” she calls me out like nobody else could. It makes me laugh nervously and she takes it the wrong way. “Don’t laugh, I’m serious! I’ve felt sorry enough for the both of us for years. And maybe Y/N from a month ago would’ve wanted you to suffer a little bit, but not anymore. This last month...I’ve just felt so free and happy Harry. I get what you mean now, I get it. And I’m alright.”
“That’s great, I’m happy for you Y/N.”
“Yeah, I mean I get it, but you did go about it in the worst possible way-”
“I know.”
“I’m not done,” she pushes my shoulder. “Anyway, just because you did some shitty stuff, you don’t deserve to suffer okay? Move on. Onward. Not backwards.”
I’m taken aback again when she pushes herself off my car and wraps her arms around my shoulders. I slowly envelop her into me, savoring the feel of holding her even if it’s just for a moment.
“You deserve happiness,” she says in my ear. “If that means ghosting me, I won’t fight it. You just...have to let me know.”
“That’s not called ghosting,” I say as she separates herself from me. I want to pull her back but I stuff my hands in my pockets.
“Potato potato,” she waves her hand. “I should go. Just...take care of yourself Harry.”
Y POV (1 year later):
“That’s wonderful news,” I smile at my client who gathers their materials back into their portfolio. “I’ll have my assistant forward the contract over tonight. I look forward to working with your team.”
I shake hands and watch them leave the room before collapsing into my chair. I knew starting your own business was hard, but this last year was a bumpy road. I’d started my own consultation business, and only had two clients. This was my first big-deal contract I’d signed; I was promised two whole years with this team!
I reach for my phone to tell Alec, but I remember we weren’t talking. Well, I wasn’t speaking to him--he’d told me last night before my big meeting that he’d been offered a promotion at work. But the catch was it was in the Edinburgh offices “which works out perfectly for us! Your sister lives there, we can visit them often...what do you think?”
I’d been so angry then. Firstly, he’d sprung the news on me the night before a big day, and second he’d already made the decision for us. I was so angry I’d just gone quiet, and told him I had a big meeting the next morning.
My fingers itch though, to tell someone. My fingers hover over Harry’s name.
Every since I confronted him last year at work, he disappeared again but not completely. He texted me a few times, once on my birthday, another during a heat wave in the city asking me if I wanted to grab drinks. I wasn’t available and he hadn’t really texted me since. I knew he was a phone call away, and he knew the same of me. Yet neither of us ever picked up the phone to call each other. I wasn’t sure why, but we were still giving each other space.
Well fuck it, I think. I call him and he picks up on the fourth ring.
“Y/N?”
“Hey, are you busy?”
“Uh no--hold up, wait. Not you...Sorry Y/N give me a second.”
I bite my lip, he could be at work, I should’ve texted him.
“Hey,” Harry’s tone is different now, softer and the background noises quiet to almost nothing. “Sorry it was so loud in there, we’re celebrating a birthday--Serena, the receptionist you remember?”
“Oh yeah,” I have a vague picture of her in my head. “Don’t let me keep you from the festivities-”
“Why did you call? S’no big deal, I’m not a big cake person anyway.”
“Ooh, cake? Eat a slice for me, I don’t get enough sweets living with a health nut...” I trail off realizing who I was talking to.
“I’ll save you one if you swing by?” Harry suggests after a beat of awkward silence. Another second passes as I consider what he’s asking: he wanted to see me.
“Uh, okay! You don’t have to ask me twice,” I grin, a strange bubble of excitement making it’s way through me. “My office is actually not too far from your station. I’ll walk it.”
“Your office? Where are you these days?” Harry asks as I slip my bag over my body and head out the door. I was exactly an 8 minute walk from his station--I’d mapped it when I found the place cheap online.
“I’m renting a whole office! It’s all very professional--I mean it’s like, one and a half rooms..oh and I have to share the toilets with the whole floor-”
“That’s good, so there’s no way you’ll be caught dead in there if you’re sharing it with the floor,” I hear the laugh in his voice.
“That’s a very insensitive thing to say,” I scold him.
“It’s been a year, c’mon Y/N.”
“We almost died!”
“We weren’t going to die. You’re alive right now!”
“Thanks to a really bad detective and a toilet seat,” I say and relish at the sound of Harry’s laugh on the other end of the line.
“That’s not how you thank someone who saved your life,” Harry finally says when he’s done laughing.
“You didn’t save my life, I was never going to die in the first place remember?”
“Touche,” he laughs. “Get over here faster, I want to see your face.”
“I’m trying!” I speed up. The background noise grows louder on his side again and he apologises. “S’alright. Anyway I just called cuz I had good news and nobody to share it with immediately.”
“Tell me.”
“Long story short, I started my own consulting firm! Finance advice--stuff like that, and I signed my first long-term contract! With an actual client not just for like, a project! I’m-” I squeal, I couldn’t help it. “It’s such a big deal for me I’ve been struggling just breaking ever since I started up.”
“Y/N I’m getting you the whole bloody cake for that,” Harry says. I finally turn the corner to his station, nearly jogging at this point.
“Only if Serena doesn’t mind.” I joke.
“In that dress, who would mind,” he says. I pause on the street, he could see me. I squint but he’s nowhere in sight. And then there, he steps out from the steps and waves. I don’t bother taming the smile on my face and neither does he.
“I see you Detective,” I shout.
“I saw you first!” He shouts.
In an instant we’re rushing towards each other, bodies crashing as I wrap my arms around his neck and squeeze hard. It felt like a reunion.
“How did we go this long without seeing each other,” I say when we pull apart. “I’ve actually missed you.” With the closure between us and no baggage weighing our memories down, I’d actually begun to feel nostalgic about Harry every time I thought about us--usually the friendship, not quite the marriage.
“I don’t know,” Harry pulls me close to him again. “I think we gave each other too much space this time around. We’ve got to find a better middleground.”
“I think we’re standing on it.” I joke.
“Hey, Styles!” A voice calls from the entrance. “Stop snogging your girl and come back in here. Serena’s wondering why you’re running away from her big day.”
“I’m not snogging anybody,” Harry calls back. “And I’ll be there in a minute.”
“Bring her with ya, we’ve got plenty of cake!”
Harry looks down at me and I raise an eyebrow. “You think they’ll let me have more than a slice?”
“I’m their commanding officer, I can tell them to let you have as many as you want.”
“Lead the way,” I grin, half excited to see Harry and half excited for the baked goods. Harry grabs my hand and leads me in. Unfortunately, enough people recognize me from the bank heist that Harry has to explain we’ve known each other for a while. Fortunately, enough people remember me to ply me with sweets to make up for Harry screwing up my case. I have zero complaints and celebrate the day with free cake.
H’s POV
My phone vibrates with Y/N’s text, she was here for lunch. Ever since she called me a couple weeks ago and we decided we couldn’t live without staying in contact, we tried to pop over for lunch whenever we could. It felt like old times. Being Y/N’s friend again was what I was missing out on. I was finally living the version of my life that felt right. I had a bounce in my step, I felt happy when I woke up. Even my officers teased me, trying to allude that I was getting some until I threatened them with paperwork. But I was brighter at work too.
I text Y/N that I would be a few minutes more, and when I finally go into the lobby to meet her she’s having a conversation with Serena.
“Man of the hour,” Serena says as I walk up. “Your girl’s here.”
“I can see that, thank you.” Serena insisted on calling Y/N that despite telling her multiple times we weren’t together.
“Serena was just telling me all the wild things she got up to for her sixty-fifth,” Y/N winks at Serena. I didn’t want to be part of that conversation so I drag her by the arm out of the station.
We walk in silence towards a small sandwich shop around the corner from us. I grab her swinging hand to catch her attention, and she gives me a small smile before turning away. But she keeps her hand in mine.
She’s unusually quiet, and I wait until after we’ve ordered to broach the subject. Before I could, she blurts out: “Alec's got to give his final answer today.” I nearly choke on my sandwich. She’s told me her predicament last week when I noticed she looked upset and wouldn’t let her be until she told me. I was gutted, but it didn’t seem like she wanted to go.
“I...that means, hm.” I gather my thoughts--and all my emotions too. “Have you decided if you’re...moving with him?”
“I dunno, this is an amazing job offer. I could be closer to my sister too but...I just don’t know. My life’s in London, my new practice too. How can I leave it all?”
“That’s tricky,” I say even though deep inside I was relieved it sounded like she wasn’t going. “Couldn’t you just move your practice there? Travel to London when you had meetings? You could always stay with me if you needed.”
She huffs, there was more she wanted to say but she keeps it in. I push her to open up. “It’s just, he sprang this on me a couple weeks ago and he just expected me to follow him. I love him, I do. But that’s asking a lot! It’s only been a year or so, and it’s nice to know he’s serious enough about me to want me to go with him. I just...”
“And we only just reconnected again,” I try to sound lighthearted but when she looks at me I can tell she knows I feel more than I’m letting on.
“Can you imagine?” She raises her eyebrow. “If I told him I’m staying because I just reconnected again with my ex...”
“Ex-husband makes us sound older than we are.”
“We are old,” she puts her sandwich down and sighs. “You wear orthopedic shoes Harry.”
“I won’t take offense to that,” I look down at my shoes. They were comfortable on the job. “So...I’m not factored into your decision at all? Whether you want to stay or not?”
I see the emotion in her eyes; she was conflicted. “I dunno,” she finally says.
“Don’t let me hold you back,” I say even though I wanted to beg her to stay. “You love him right? Maybe you should...”
She stares ahead, her face falling. I knew Y/N’s face before a cry, so I reach my hand out and clasp hers over the table. She squeezes my hand once before removing it, I felt like I did something wrong.
“Anyway,” her face brightens up again, though the look in her eyes stays. “I watched that new movie you recommended and it was awful...”
She changes the subject swiftly, and I don’t object. I didn’t know how to tell her to stay without being selfish, and I didn’t know how to tell her it was okay to go and act like I was telling her the truth.
But near the end of my shift, the evening receptionist buzzes me she was letting my girlfriend through. I don’t bother correcting her.
“Hey Y/N!” one of my officers calls out to her when she walks into the floor. “We’re all planning on throwing you a party.”
“For what?” She stops by his desk. I notice Detective Cole eyeing her, before joining in.
“He actually has a life now, he’s usually a lot more bossy with us.”
Y/N turns to me, eyebrow raised. “I’m afraid the party’s a little premature. But I’d never say no to cake.”
My heart sinks, she was going. I watch her walk towards me and she notices my expression, the smile is gone from her face by the time she reaches me.
“I told Alec I would try it out, 6 months. See how it goes...I can see my sister more often, help her out with my niece...” It sounds like she’s coming up with excuses to justify herself to me.
“That’s...” my words get stuck in my throat, the lie was too big to get out. “Your sister will love that.” I settle with. I take her hand and walk her out to a more private hallway. “When do you leave.”
“Two weeks,” she bites her lip. “I-I’m gonna miss you Harry. We just got into a flow and-”
“We’ll still talk.” I pull her in, I couldn’t bear to watch her face fall apart in front of me. And I didn’t want her to see my own face crumbling. I tuck her under my chin, “We’ve got phones, and you’ll be in London sometimes for work right? We won’t be like before, we’ll still talk.”
I know she can feel my heart racing, and I want her to know what she was doing to me because my mouth can’t seem to tell her. I hold her for a little longer, and when she goes, I know my unit won’t be throwing any parties for her in a while.
Three Months Later:
I’m in bum mode by 8pm that Friday. I’d had a long week, a tough case with no breaks and finally had an evening off so I changed into sweats the second I got home, taken a hot shower and washed the week off.
The knock on the door surprises me. The peephole doesn’t distinguish who’s outside, a hood covering their face. I decide to open the door, to find a teary Y/N hundreds of miles from home.
“Y/N-”
“I wanted you to tell me to stay.” she says to me immediately. Her tears continue dripping onto her cheeks. I stare in confusion, wondering for a moment if my lack of sleep had caused me to hallucinate her.
“Wha-”
“When I told you about the move...you told me I should go. I wanted you to tell me to stay Harry! I thought you would’ve told me to stay.”
I move aside silently, so we weren’t having a conversation where my neighbours could hear.
“How was I supposed to know that?”
“I don’t know!” she throws her bag, coat, and phone down on the floor in a heap. “You just were! I thought when I told you, you would say-”
“I didn’t want to tell you what to do with your life based on what I wanted! I thought I already established that!” Suddenly we’re arguing.
“You never had an issue before!”
“Well look where it lead us,” I move away from the door and back to where I was previously relaxing on the couch.
“A country apart!” She’s hot on my heels. “Didn’t you want me to stay?”
Some part of me is still completely confused what was going on, but Y/N’s fiery frustration overflows into my cup and an invisible force pours it down my throat.
“Yes. Yeah! Of course I wanted you to stay!”
“So why didn’t you say that?” She cries.
“I was trying not to be selfish!”
“Well you just pick the worst times to be selfish!”
“I never said I was good with my timing.” I mumble.
“Don’t treat me like-like some fragile porcelain Harry!” Y/N gets right into my face. “I’m not! I’m different, I’ve grown from that fragile place. I don’t need you walking on eggshells around me, I just want you to be honest!”
“When am I not honest?” I shout back.
“You haven’t been honest with me for months! Just say what you feel Harry, stop bloody holding back all the time! I just want the real you!”
“Fine!” I explode. “I love you Y/N! I love you so much it physically hurts me to be near you and not be able to hold you. I want to be able to kiss you like I used to, I want to go back in time and warn myself to get it right! I want to tell you how amazing you are and how sorry I am every day. I can’t! We’ve both got our own lives! I’m not being dishonest I just don’t want to fuck with your life again! I’ve accepted that I’m nothing more than an ex and your best friend!”
That stops her in her tracks. Her chest heaves as she swipes at her cheeks, and then she pushes her hands into my chest. I stumble but catch myself. She pushes me again, big tears rolling down her cheeks, and I stumble onto the couch. She turns and paces to the door and back.
“What are you even doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be in Edinburgh?” I finally ask the question I should’ve asked the second I saw her.
“Sure,” she throws herself onto the seat next to me and buries her face in her hands. “I...I didn’t want to be there. I just had to leave, and I couldn’t stand my sister going on about what a catch Alec was. How I should feel lucky. I had to get away. I never should’ve left London...I just thought maybe Alec was my chance at a fresh happy future, and you told me to go so I thought you didn’t want me to stay. But I fucked up there too, and I just had to go. And I came here with nowhere else--I can’t even live in my own home for three more months...”
She trails off. It was a lot of information to process. I don’t know how long we stay on the couch like that, a foot apart in silence.
“Everyone I know will probably think I’m just an idiot for coming here of all places, but this was the only place that made sense because I--Harry I think I...” She glances at me. “I...”
“I know,” I say after she struggles to say what she wanted to say. But I knew.
“But I feel so guilty, I’m doing to him what you did to me...it’s not fair.”
I didn’t think about it like that, I realise. But this situation was more complicated than that, I tell her. We had history, she’d moved to a whole new country for him, he must know somewhere Y/N didn’t actually want to move. But the parallels between her situation and ours are clear as day. I don’t know what to say.
“Stay the night,” I put a hand on her thigh. She doesn’t move it off. “Get some sleep, when you wake up tomorrow, make your decision. You know how I feel...and you know how you feel.”
“You’re right,” she lays her hand on top of mine. I thread my fingers through hers and hold on. Her puppy eyes tear me apart, I want to gather her in my arms and kiss her misery away. But I don’t want to add to her guilt.
“Let me get you something to eat, you’re probably hungry.” holding her hand was getting painful. I leave her alone in the living room, so she could collect herself. If someone told Harry three years ago this was where I would end up, he would’ve laughed in their face.
Y POV:
I couldn’t believe I did that, I think as I sit on the 5 hour ride back to Edinburgh. I felt untethered yesterday, after arguing with Alec all week because I was just miserable when I wasn’t in London. My sister’s pressure to be happy with what I had, I felt like I had no one to turn to who would understand me. And that had driven me into Harry’s arms, the train ride there fueling my frustration and anger. It had accidentally exploded in Harry’s direction when I got to his place but I was glad for it. He’d told me how he felt. And it was complicated as hell for me but somewhere deep inside, I knew where this was leading.
When I get back home to a worried Alec, we sit down and have a hard conversation. It breaks my heart leaving him, but after one last night together I pack most of my things and head to my sisters. The irony isn’t lost of me, hers was exactly where I went to when Harry and I split.
My sister tries to be supportive but I by the time the three months are over, I feel suffocated with her overprotective nature, and the full house she lived in.
“You’re just going to do what you want to do aren’t you?” She asks the day she drops me back off to the station. I’d spent the rest of the three months at hers--I couldn’t go back home to my house anyway and something about going back to London for another man felt wrong. I’d seen Alec a few times in those months. The last time was last night, we’d shared a few drinks and maybe some kisses. But it was a final goodbye last night, heavy but final.
“I don’t want to be a bad person,” I say. “I just don’t want to feel stuck somewhere because I feel bad.”
“You’re not a bad person,” my sister brushes my hair behind my shoulder as she hugs me tight. “I love you. Mum would be so proud of you for following your heart, you always did play it too safe.”
“I guess my rebellious phase just came a little late.”
“Ever since you met that Harry guy, you quit your stable job and haven’t been the same since,” she wags her finger at me like a stern maternal figure. She breaks character when she laughs and hugs me again. “M’gonna miss having you here. The kids loved having their aunt around.”
“I’m sure they’re happier having their play room back.” I joke to cover up how sad I felt leaving them too. Even though most days felt like we were walking all over each other, it felt like growing up in our small childhood home again; a nice reset before I headed back to London.
The train ride goes by quickly, and I settle back into my home over the weekend, getting my furniture out of storage and cleaning up after the last tenants. I’d been gone only 6 months but the second I walked through the door, I knew I was home again.
Letting Harry know I was back makes me nervous so I put it off for the week. I show up at his flat the following Saturday, wringing my hands as I wait for him to answer. I didn’t even know if he was home.
“Y/N,” a shocked voice says as I turn to walk away. Harry studies me as I stand awkwardly in his hall. “You’re back.”
I hear what he doesn’t say: you never called me after you showed up three months ago. and what happened to you?
“Hey,” I brush past him into his flat, fiddling with my jacket as he locks the door. “I’m back in London.”
“I can see that.” He eyes me. “Alone?” He asks, and again I hear the words he doesn’t say.
“Alone,” I smile. “I just needed...time to figure things out. I’ve been staying with my sister.”
“Full house?” He says, knowing it before I had to say it.
“So full,” I laugh, and just like that everything is okay. He takes my jacket from me and hangs it in his closet, like he knew I was going to stay a while. “There were too many mornings when I woke up to my niece just staring at me, waiting for me to wake.”
“Aw, they must miss you now.”
“Yeah,” I follow him through to his living room. I remember the last time I was here, sort of embarrassing looking back. “I was missing London though. And...you.”
He looks up. “Are you-”
“Harry,” I swallow what I need to say. His gaze is laser-sharp and it’s slightly intimidating to admit something like this. I’d given my heart to him before, and here I was giving it again after I’d spent years healing from what he did to it. It felt right, but also foolish. I guess love would always feel a little foolish.
“Y/N,” he says after I don’t say anything.
“So,” I walk up to where he stands near the window, the afternoon sun illuminates his handsome face. I reach up to touch it, no longer able to keep my hands to myself when he was so close. My breath catches as he closes his eyes against my palm, his lashes casting shadows on his cheeks.
“Y/N,” he keeps his eyes closed, like I would disappear if he opened them.
“I’m finally home,” I tell him, feeling the familiar lump in my throat as my eyes tear up. He opens his eyes then, they’re also pooling with unshed tears. It makes me laugh; he arches a brow. “We’re both here, in each other’s arms finally and...we’re crying.”
“We’re not a very typical pair, are we?”
“Nothing typical about us.” I say and he chuckles, kissing my wrist. My heart stutters in my chest.
“You’re either crazy or just incredibly forgiving, giving me a second chance at this.” Harry says outright.
“It’s us I’m giving a second chance to,” I slide my hands up, locking them around his neck.
“D’you think we’ll get the timing right this time?” He whispers as he lowers his face.
“We better,” I keep my eyes on his mouth, the one I’ve thought about kissing for the last three months. And then, finally, his lips are on mine and I nearly cry out of relief having him in my arms. Harry, being my Harry again.
His hands clench the fabric around my waist as he pulls me closer to him, his lips leave mine and he kisses my cheek, my jaw, my temple, before he crushes me to him.
“Harry I-” I couldn’t breathe, but my strained voice gives that away and he lets me go. I’m surprised to see the tears now trailing down his face. “You’re crying,” I swipe at the fallen tears.
“I’m just so happy,” he takes my hands off his cheeks and clasps them against his chest. “Y/N I’ve only dreamed of this, I didn’t think the universe cared enough about me to let me have this reality.”
“You and your poetry,” I smile.
“I guess you’re my muse,” He pulls me back to him, this time in a sweeter kiss that lingers. Tears pool in my own eyes as my heart tries to process the enormity of emotions I was feeling. “C’mere, I just want to hold you.”
He leads me to the couch and I lay down next to him. We take in each other, face to face, the grins reflected on both of us is impossible to wipe off.
“I love you Y/N, to the sun and back.”
“Isn’t it the moon and back?” I ask.
“Sun’s further out,” he smiles like he was expecting the question. I laugh, he kisses the tip of my nose and pulls my leg over his, his arm snaking around my waist so I’m snug against him.
“What am I gonna do with you Styles,” I brush one of his curls back.
“You’ve got forever to figure that out,” he says simply. My heart races at the thought. We’d bungled the first round we spent together, but after all these years apart I had a feeling that we really would have forever this time around.
With all the emotions fluttering inside of me, all the baggage unpacked and out of sight, and Harry’s loving expression looking back at me; I believed in us.
1.5 Years Later (H’s POV):
The house is quiet when I get in--it was half past 11 and I knew Y/N was probably asleep. I texted her a couple hours ago I would be home soon but time had slipped away as I worked. I hoped she wasn’t upset.
I move stealthily through the hall, eventually making my way to our bedroom where she lays sleeping. She’d left the lamp on beside her, and I move around to her side so I can close it. I notice the open book beside her--she fell asleep while reading it again. I set it down on the drawers and tuck her hand into the covers, the subtle diamonds on her finger glows yellow under the soft lamp light. Just looking at the engagement ring sparks a rush of love for the woman before me.
Y/N had surprised me a couple months ago when she proposed to me. We’d were dating again for almost a year and a half--this time it really felt like we’d gotten the timing right on our relationship. We were happier and more in love than we’d ever been. During a candlelit dinner one night, she had pulled a chair up beside me and presented me with the ring and an ultimatum.
Apparently she’d noticed that I was always on edge--like I was waiting for her to realize that she didn’t actually forgive me for all the awful things I put her through. And she was right, but it wasn’t until she said it out loud that I realized it was an anxiety I had. I was waiting for her to realize she could do better than me--leave me the way I left her. But she proposed to show me she wasn’t going anywhere, and she showed me her own ring her father gave her--her mum’s ring.
I was blown away by her observant love, again, how she knew me better than I knew myself. I reassured her I wasn’t going anywhere either, not now or ever. And we decided we didn’t want to set any dates, we were taking it slow. Being engaged was a promise and that was all for now. I wanted to live up to Y/N’s standard, give her and her family a reason to trust me again--not only would they kill me if I ever did anything to her, but I’m pretty sure my own family would kill me too. They were over the moon when they found out we were giving it another go.
“Harry?” Y/N mumbles as I slip under the covers a little while later.
“Sorry for coming home so late,” I whisper. “I got a bit carried away with the case.”
“What’s new,” she shifts to face me, the moonlight from the windows barely illuminating her face. “M’just glad you’re home.”
“Me too,” I pull her towards me. Home, it was this house we’d moved into last year. But mostly, it was this beautiful woman in my arms who opened her heart to me despite everything. I don’t know how I got so lucky. I tell her that.
“S’not luck,” she mumbles. “The universe--our stars are finally aligned.”
“My star was pretty dim, I’m surprised yours found it.” I tuck her hair behind her ear and kiss her temple. “You found it by luck.”
“No. Your star’s always burned the brightest in my universe,” she tucks her face into my neck. “Even when I didn’t want it to be, it was still noticeable.”
“You outshine me in every way in mine,” I lean away so I can hold her face close, resting my forehead on hers. “I love you so much.”
She smiles in the dark, and leaves a kiss on the corner of my mouth. “I love you, and I’d love you more if you came home on time.”
I chuckle, “I’ll try. Tomorrow.”
“Mhm,” she says sleepily. I’d let her sleep, I think as I pull her leg over mine and hold her against my chest. Even though I hated coming home by the time she was asleep, finding her in our little safe space, and being able to hold her close as we fell asleep was my favourite part of the day.
***
The day is nearly over but the paperwork on my desk says otherwise. I sigh and slump in my chair, this was the worst part of my job.
I begin filling it out, and I’m not even halfway through when the phone rings. Serena’s on the other line, “Styles, your patient fiancee is here for you. I don’t think she’s staying patient for long though.”
I tell her I’d be out, smiling as I put down the phone. Y/N was making sure I kept my word from last night, and I would. For her, I would get in extra early tomorrow just to be sure I had the evening with her tonight.
“So when do I get the invitation to the wedding?” I hear Serena say as I walk out to the lobby. She’s putting on her coat to leave and Y/N’s bundled up herself. “And then when do I get to see the mini Styles’? I better be around to see them!”
Not many would, but I notice the slight tension in Y/N’s shoulders at the sensitive topic. I step in.
“You’re worse than my mum,” I tell her. “And she’s actually going to be the grandmother.”
“We just want to see our babies’ babies before we bite the bullet!” Serena shrugs, walking out from behind the counter. “I’ll see you tomorrow Harry, Y/N it was lovely seeing you as always.”
We wave her off, and then I wrap my arm around Y/N and we walk out to my car.
“That’s the first question everyone continues to ask me,” Y/N says as we walk. “When the date is.”
“Does that bother you?” I check in.
“A little, but only because it leads to even more questions when I say we haven’t set a date.”
We get into the car, and I ask her the other question I wanted to know: “And the baby thing? Does that...bother you?”
She turns her body to look at me, tilting her head as she tries to read me. “It doesn’t...does it bother you?”
“No,” I say honestly. “I’m happy where we are. All that stuff can...come after. I’m just-I’m happy with you.”
“Good talk then,” she grins. I can’t help but lean over for a kiss then.
“Well I don’t mind the baby making part,” I tell her. “But I think the actual babies can wait.”
She pushes me away as her cheeks flush like we hadn’t been dating and married and dating again for over ten years. “Sometimes I think you’ve just got one thing on your mind.”
“Yeah,” I say as I start the car. “That’s you.”
“Is that what distracted you so bad when you were working on my case? Because you were totally distracted and we almost died-”
“We were never going to die!” I say over her--this was a common topic of conversation between us.
“I was going to bleed out and die!” She tries to speak over me.
“Oh now you were going to bleed out? You were never dying!” I shout even louder. And we keep going for most of the way home until Y/N catches sight of a dog at a crosswalk and begins to coo at it through the window.
“Maybe we should get a dog,” she starts on another of our reoccurring topics. I sigh, ready to launch into why we should wait. And that’s how the rest of the ride home goes. Not that I minded, I could discuss the same topics with her over and over for eternity.
“You’re just threatened by a dog,” Y/N continues as we park and head up to our front door. “Because then my love would be split between both of you.”
“Yeah sure, that’s it.” I roll my eyes at her silly reasoning. But I still grab her hand in mine and kiss it as we walk in. My stomach flutters when she gazes at me as the door closes behind her.
“I’m going to wear you down soon,” she says as she takes my coat from me. I take them both out of her hands and leave them in a heap on the staircase, kissing her so she stops talking. She smiles against my lips, knowing that she was wearing me down, and I’d give her anything she asked for. Anything to make her happy. I loved her infinitely.
#harry styles#harry styles x reader#Finished Series#harry styles fic#harry styles angst#harry styles fluff#dci!harry#detective!harry#harry styles imagine#harry styles fanfic#writingsfromhome#fic#au#major love to all of you who read this and left an ask#i thought on how to end this for so long#and I think I got the ending the way i wanted it to go#this is a Whole part lol#it got long#but I think they're happy now#:)
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Author's Notes ♡: Hello hello! Here’s my POCuties collab piece for Valentine’s Day. Even though today sometimes makes me feel unloved please know everyone is deserving of love and even if you don’t have someone this year, you can have me! I love you and so do your favs okay? (✿◠‿◠) ~ bunny ❥
Warnings : none! Just very sweet (a bit of the reader feeling like a burden to tamaki so a touch of sadness here and there)
Word count : 2.1k
Paring(s) : Tamaki Amajiki x F! Reader (fem pronouns)
Enjoy ♡
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Forever // T. Amajiki
Being with Tamaki for a few years taught his lover a lot. She saw more sides of him than most, and it made her heart swell to see the usually quiet boy happy and determined when he accomplished something he was trying for or when he was down she knew just how to cheer him up.
As the day drew on she realised just how much she loved him and how much she wished for him to be home, to give him a big kiss as he came through the door, knowing that his day was long, plagued with paperwork and patrols. Hearing the door open she saw her tall boyfriend enter, hood over his eyes as he let out a sigh, stretching as he felt his body being encased by his girlfriend “Hello butterfly how was your day” His low voice spoke out as she gave him a bright smile “It was nice heaving the day off but i missed you Tama” she pouted as he gave her a chuckle, kissing her forehead “I missed you too, the office was a bore without my adorable secretary” Moving into their shared apartment Tamaki saw food already laid out in front of him “I ran you some bath water too” [ ] called out as she rounded the wall separating the kitchen and living room “Y-you didn't have to do that love im-” A finger silenced his pleas “Let me take care of you okay? You need your rest and i didnt want you to worry about anything coming home except relaxing and cuddling with me okay?” [ ] said as she stood on her tippy toes, kissing the top of his cheek “Tamaki Amajiki we have been doing this for years, won't you please let me love you without trying to outdo me ; you deserve it, you're a wonderful hero, you're my hero and eventually...you'll be our family hero..once we have one..” She trailed off as he stared at her, watching a sadden face appear over her features. Shaking it off as soon as it had appeared she gave him another smile “Its alright. There's no rush, i'm here for the long haul , me and you okay?” she said as she let his face go , heading to the couch “Now go go, hurry up before the food gets cold.” She teased as he gave her a soft look, coming over to kiss her cheek “Okay i wont argue butterfly”
These little things stuck with him, her caring ways, cooking for him, cleaning his office while hed be gone, even doing some of his paperwork while he was on parole. He loved her so much and enjoyed all of the little things here and there she did for him. He ddi the same, and each time made her cry, not out of being upset but for how caring he was to her. Bringing her roses, making sure she didnt have to cook if he could help it, spa days and doing more crafts and bonding with her whenever they could. But he realized while she helped him with so much he felt like he struggled. She struggled with her own issues too, similar to his. Sometimes she felt like she wasnt enough, she had her own anxieties and could get in a sup when she felt inadequate, unlovable and unwanted. But to him, to tamaki he loved everything about her, and she was one of the strongest people he knew. He felt motivated and glad to have her as the one he wished to marry , to have kids with, to start a family. But that also broke his heart when the topic came up she did usually didnt talk much about it, happily making plans but going back on them by saying ‘if i was a good mother’ She didnt want to dissapoint their future kids, didnt want to be a lacking mother or wife. As usual Tamaki came home, but htis time he went past the wonderful smelling food in the kitchen and to their bedroom, his cute girlfriend wrapped up in a blanket “How are you feeling butterfly?” He asked as she gave him a smile, reaching over to hug him “Im oaky! Just a bit overwhelmed is all, im sorry i passed out during the meeting..” She said as she gave him a hurt look before continuing “I shouldve tried harder to stay and present with you i-” Before she could finish he gave her a kiss, stopping her words “You needed rest. Im still surprised you got up to cook, did you at least take a nap love?” He asked as she shook her head , causing him to smile “Good. i love you butterfly and i woudnt change that for the world” he said as she smiled, giving him a hug ��I’d hope so” She giggled as he pouted “Never doubt my love for you [ ], no matter what im gonna be here, i promise okay?” he said as she nuzzled the boy, kissing his nose “ And i for you Tamaki”
February came in , the happy couple had started up to take more time off to do more things and enjoy eachothers presence in the month of love. As the days went by Tamaki noticed [ ] was having odd days. From sleeping long hours of the day to just crying randomly, he knee something was wrong. Coming from the store he heard sobbing from their bathroom. Terrified , he tried to enter only feeling the door being locked “[ ] baby whats wrong? Can i come in?” with no response he nervously knocked again. “[ ] please...whats wrong” He pleaded as the door unclicked, showing his still beautiful but tear stained cheeked girl. “T-tama..” She cried as she just jumped into his arms, scaring the indigo haired boy “Baby are you okay?” he asked as she took in a breath before smiling sadly “Y-yeah i am..” She said as he picked her up, taking them into the living room. “I love you..and whatever is making you feel like this..if i can help let me okay?” Tamaki said as [ ] shook her head, placing it into his shoulder as they fell asleep.
Every day from her breakdown Tamaki came to her office with a rose, ate lunch with her and made sure she was hydrated and well. Once the week of valentines day came up, he had his plan set in motion. He had their schedules fixed, the week off for themselves as they did different things. A spa day the first day, a picnic the next, shopping at an expensive store for clothes. Then an art day where they drew (or tried to ) eachother and made art fro and about the other. Once the day of Valentines came however, it was different. It started with them taking a shower together, Tamaki cooking breakfast in bead for [ ] as they talked through the morning. Tamaki told her the outfits they ha gotten the days prior was for tonight which gave [ ] the jitters. She was excited for what her pro hero boyfriend had instore for them. Once they got to the restaurant all eys were on them. [ ]’s long black dress falttereed tamakis white suit and black bow tie. The two of them sat and started to eat, coversating with some fans who so happend to be around thwm. One was a small girl with wide hopeful eyes. She came to the couple with her mom in toe “Im so sorry to interrupt you two, my daughter wouldnt let mt husband and me rest until she came over to you guys” the wmoan laughed, causing bothe members to smile “Hello there how are you?” Tamaki asked the girl as she stepped from behind her mother “ H-hi my name is Shiemi a-and i really like you suneater!” The small girl said , causing [ ] , Tamaki and her mom to smile “Why thank you Shiemi, i hope im a good hero for you” Tamaki responded as the little girl shook her head “The best! Youre so cool. A-and your wife is pretty like mama! I like you dress miss suneater” The girl said , causing [ ] to stutter as she sipped her water “O-oh why thank you Shiemi but Im-” before she could continue she saw her boyfriend give the woman and her daughter a wide smile “She is, inst she?” He said as he turned to [ ] , moving from his chair “Tama what are you-” [ ] asked again as he leaned to the little girls ear , then to the mothers as they both gave him a smile, the woman happily shaking her head as her daughter followed the hero. Confused, [ ] watched as he picked the little girl up, putting her atop of the bar table “Hey everyone! Suneater has an announcement!” she yelled as most people turned around or to the table in the middle of the room, watching and smiling at the energetic child and pro hero “In fact I do, [ ] would you mind standing?” Tamaki asked as she gave him a wide eyed look, standing as he gave her a smile, extending and hand to her as she joined his side
“H-hey guys , as you know um..this si my lovely girlfriend and partner [ ]” He started as she gave everyone in the room a wary smile, her face feeling hot as he continued “ Ive known her for years, and weve been dating for some of those, she's seen me through thick and thin, helped me out in a pinch and made me feel like the strongest man alive, well next to almight…” he whispered as some of the people laughed, more paying them attention “And through all of this….i could think of a more beautiful and right person to spend the rest of my life with” And with the the young child handed the now kneeling man a ring as some whooped and hollered, others recording as both [ ] and the girls mother had tears in their eyes “[ ] [ ], the love of my life, my butterfly, i couldnt think of a more beautiful person inside and out to be with, will you give me the honor and make me the happiest man on this earth to be my wife?” He asked as the ring was revealed, diamond glistening as his own tear filled eyes looked to hers. Thinking her voice would fail her she shook her head yes, causing the room to yell as she had her ring put on her finger , jumping to hug her standing fiance as they hugged and cried, video of the engagement spreading as he thought to himself ‘I can now have my family, my endless love with you my dear butterfly’
As their wedding came , all of their friends and family came, including the new found friends of the young Shiemi and her parents. The ceremony went though flawlessly, Shiemi being their flower girl as the newlyweds ran down the easel , heading for their limo as they herded for the reception. The family spoke on how happy they were from their marriage, friends giving their comments on how they knew the couple would get married as the couple laughed at some stories and comments about their relationship. The night ended with so much love and joy for the new couple, startint their life together\
Two years went by before valentines day came again, three years to the day he had proposed arrived. Happily and ready to celebrate Tamaki woke up to his wife missing, hearing her fumble in the bathroom. Heading to the room he was shocked to she her in a disarray , eyes foggy as she met his “Tama...i have a surprised” She said as her teras fell down her face. Confused and still a bit tired , he gave her a look as she handed him a blue and while stick. The word pregnant snapped him awake as more tears started to fall, handing him two and three more all with the same small but powerful word “Im..gonna be a dad?” He asked as she smiled, shaking her head as she hugged the trembling girl “T-tama i'm gonna be a mom..what if i'm not good enough…” She sobbed as he cooed her, kissing her lips as his tears fell with hers “You're gonna be great Butterfly, i promise, you're gonna be so so great” He said as his heart swelled feeling her lips against his ‘This...This is forever , a love i wished for...and i couldn't have asked for more of a way to live my life...i love you butterfly’
#my hero academia#bnha#boku no hero academia#bnha x reader#amajiki tamaki#tamaki amakiji x reader#pocuties 💕#pocuties collab
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Broken Wings, Pretty Things
AN: Based on this bc I saw it today and I’m trash
Pairing: Steve/Bucky
Words: 1662
Read on AO3 here
Bucky doesn’t pay attention to the passage of time anymore. The room they keep him in has large windows, but even the moonlight burns his eyes, so he has no way of knowing whether it’s night or day. He just knows they wake him up several times a day to strap him to a table and pump him full of things that make his entire body burn.
Even so, it’s been awhile since anyone’s been by. They usually had him on a pretty strict schedule. He doesn’t have the energy to look around, to try and fight or escape. He’s never been so tired in his life, but whatever they put into his veins keeps him awake, a deep, simmering pain he can’t shake. He doesn’t know if the screaming that he’s hearing is outside or inside his own head.
Vaguely, he becomes aware that there’s someone in the room with him. He keeps repeating his classification, his number, determined not to forget this most precious information. Well, that and light blue eyes, but he couldn’t forget those, not even in the middle of a war, not even when he left those eyes behind in Brooklyn.
“Bucky?”
The voice stirs something in him, but it can’t be, just another fever dream brought on by the chemicals that ran through his blood. That voice couldn’t be here, that voice was across an ocean, safe, not thinking about him. That voice, which he had heard in his dreams for years, didn’t belong in this place. He had always done whatever it took to protect that voice, it’s carrier. How could it be here?
“Oh my God.”
He feels the straps around him being pulled off, and he tries to focus on his savior. Tall, broad, military gear.
But those eyes. He’d know those eyes anywhere.
“Is that...”
He can’t let himself speak his name, because if this wasn’t true, if this person was someone else...now that might really break him.
“It’s me,” says the man. Bucky tries to focus, sees the nose, which isn’t as crooked, the face, which is lined in worry, the shoulders, which aren’t hunched, holding in a cough, “It’s Steve.”
Bucky doesn’t care that he looks different. He doesn’t care that he looks about seven feet taller and as wide as a truck. He doesn’t care, he just can’t tear his eyes away from him.
“Steve?”
He can feel his lips curl up involuntarily, the first smile he’s had on his face in what feels like years. His eyes, which he had kept closed for so long, were suddenly wide open, drinking Steve in like a man in a desert craves a glass of tall water. He reaches out almost blindly, desperate to make contact with some part of Steve, only to realize Steve’s hands are wrapped almost all the way around his forearms. The difference in his physical appearance is jarring, but his face, his eyes, the soft smile he gives Bucky, that’s all the same. It’s all exactly the same and it feels like someone’s switched the IV in his arm from the chemicals to pure sunshine, filling him to the brim with warmth.
“Come on,” Steve pulls him up, and Bucky takes a second to steady himself, still clinging to the leather of Steve’s jacket, unable and completely unwilling to let go.
“Steve.”
He could say his name a million times, it would never be enough.
Steve looks at him, his brows knitting together in that telltale way when he’s really worried or focused on something, and touches the side of Bucky’s face lightly with the palm of his hand. It takes absolutely everything in Bucky not to sink into the touch and be buried in the feel of it.
“I thought you were dead.”
It’s Bucky’s turn to take him in, and he realizes, with a little jolt, that Steve is taller than him now. Taller, clearly stronger, standing straight up, not with that hunch in his posture from his joint issues. What is he supposed to say when the man he’s known all his life, the man he’s loved for all his life, is so different yet so the same? He goes for the joke, it’s easier than the alternative.
“I thought you were smaller.”
An explosion in the distance pulls Steve’s eyes away from him, but Bucky can’t take his eyes off Steve, still a little afraid that this is all a terrible dream, that he’ll blink and Steve will be gone again, disappeared into the hazy corners of his mind that he could only retreat to when they left him alone to battle with the poison they put in his blood.
“Come on,” Steve pulls him along with ease, supporting almost all of his body weight, while Bucky’s tries to remember how to use his legs. He can’t stop staring at Steve, who’s checking the corners like a real soldier, but Bucky can’t compute that, can’t understand how he’s grown a foot and is supporting his weight like it’s nothing, not when, six months ago, Bucky had spent two weeks checking on Steve every day to make sure the New York winter didn’t kill him with his asthma.
“What happened to you?” he manages, still trying to get his feet under him. Steve doesn’t seem to be bothered by his weight.
“I joined the Army.”
The make it down one hallway until Bucky finally manages to support his own weight. Steve lets him walk on his own, and though he appreciates the gesture of not needing help, he immediately misses the contact with Steve.
Steve walks purposefully in front of him, still checking corners and keeping his eye on Bucky. Bucky has about a million questions, and questions will keep him from falling asleep on his feet.
“Did it hurt?”
“A little.”
So a lot.
Bucky suddenly thinks of what they had been pumping into him for the last month. The whispers he had heard of a super soldier, a new creation, the way to turn the tide in the war. Fear settles in his gut like poison.
“Is this permanent?”
Steve shrugs, looking back at him again.
“So far.”
The make it to the hangar, which is already a torrent of heat and explosions. Bucky has no idea where they’re going, but he would follow Steve anywhere. Even death, if that’s where they were headed.
Bucky loses track of his mind when they come face to face with a man he had only seen in the shadows of the base, a commander of some kind, but one that never stopped to look at him long. All he knows is that Steve throws a punch at the man that would have broken the old Steve’s wrist. He was never much of a fighter, no matter his intentions. A doctor that Bucky recognizes from his time in the green room separates them by splitting the bridge. That was probably a good thing, he reflects, when the man Steve punched peels off his own face to reveal a horrible red skull.
“You don’t have one of those do you?” he asks Steve quietly, unable to handle the world in front of him without humor.
The two leave he and Steve in the middle of the exploding hangar, and it takes Steve only seconds to see their only hope: one last beam that could get them to safety.
“Come on. Let’s go, up,” Steve tries to push him to go up the stairs first, but Bucky sidesteps immediately, thinking of the pact he had made with himself at 13 years old. Steve always goes up the stairs first. It doesn’t matter that he’s different now, Bucky has to look out for him. Always.
Steve insists that Bucky go first, and he can feel immediately that the beam isn’t going to last long. The heat is overwhelming, like it could melt steel, and he just makes it across before the beam collapses, falling into the depths of the fire. Leaving him and Steve separated.
Bucky’s brain immediately clears, not filled with the fog of the pain he’s in, the exhaustion. There’s a problem in front of him, the biggest problem, and he’s going to find a solution, to get Steve to where he was, to get Steve out of here.
“There’s gotta be a rope or something-”
“Just go! Get out of here!”
Bucky feels the anger rising in his throat. As if he would ever, ever leave Steve.
“No not without you!”
He seems to understand that his options were get across, or watch them both die. He bends back metal like pipe cleaners, and Bucky is suddenly, viscerally reminded of the crafts his sisters would bring home when they were children. But this was a war, and there’s no art in war.
Steve makes a jump that no one should be able to make, one that you only hear about in stories, and they get off the base with just seconds to spare. Bucky refuses the medical attention offered to him as they start the long trek back to base, instead walking next to Steve, stealing a glance at him every so often, forgetting, more than once, to look up instead of down.
“Thank you,” Bucky whispers to Steve halfway through the night, as the men around them chatter animatedly about showers and good food, eager to get back to a military base where they were soldiers and not prisoners.
“Come on pal,” Steve grips the back of his neck gently in the darkness, where they knew no one could see, “You’d do the same for me.”
You’re right, Bucky thinks, watching Steve step into the role of leader he had always been suited for, in all ways but physical. Now they can see what I always have, he thinks dryly, still unable to tear his eyes away from the blue eyes that would carry across his dreams for the rest of his life.
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Kindred Spirit (Taehyung X You) (ONESHOT)
A/N: The full version of the Taehyung fanfic, but I changed it a little from the preview I posted. Hope its okay 😘 also, im not sure whats an "er of their marriage" means exactly? But i take it their life after marriage? Ill make an epilogue of that soon! 😘
"Ive been an idol for years Y/N and you have never once come to see me perform? Dont you know people would die for all the free passes and tickets I left for you?!" Her bestfriend grumbles, hands crossed over his chest, his pout over an inch long.
Y/N laughs.
"Thats why I said you should give it to someone else thats actually have time to go watch you,"
"But you are my best friend. BESTFRIEND Y/N. How is is possible you never once saw me perform? And you dont even know any of my bandmates? How is that possible??" Yoongi keeps on grumbling in disbelief.
"Well.. Min Yoongi. I can give you an answer. Because I'm busy with real life okay. You know my appa wants me to take over soon. You know I dont do it on purpose right?" Y/N pouts, hoping if shes cute enough, or looks guilty enough Yoongi would actually forgive her.
"Nope. Your puppy face wont cut it this time,"
Damn.
"You are coming. And if I dont see you cheering your ass off tomorrow night, front row, our friendship is over. Over I say!"
And thats is why Y/N is running and pushing through the excited crowd of boys and girls in the stadium, trying to find her section. She made it! She almost didnt, but almost didnt matter. Shes here now. All dressed in her work clothes, with what is supposed to be called an Army Bomb in her hand, something that her secretary shoved in her bag earlier, saying its a must have for an Army. She dont even know what an Army is!
As the show starts, Y/N jumps to the music, smiling proudly everytime Yoongi make an appearance. She has heard him rapped before, but she never seen him this charismatic. Its as if the man on stage is not even the dorky Yoongi she has known for years. And his band members... wow. All so talented, all so good looking.
As the concert ended, Y/N makes her way backstage, flashing the pass Yoongi gave her and make her way through series of dressing room, trying to find the one where the boys are in.
"Must be this one," she followed the door that has the most sound and lights to find the boys chatting, congratulating each other. "Uh, Yoongi?" Y/N calls out softly, feeling awkward. Is she even supposed to be here?
"Oh you are here. God, cant believe you actually made it!" Yoongi rushed over and gave her a tight hug. "Wait, I'll introduce you to the others, but I need to change my pants first. Wait here, dont move!" Before she could say anything, Yoongi has already ran off.
"Uh.. okay. Ill stay here I guess," she moved herself timidly to a corner and stands awkwardly, hoping no one would notice her. But wishes dont always come true.
"Hey, uh..." a guy, a very handsome guy, who Y/N recognizes as one of Yoongi's band members, but cant be sure who, approached her.
"Uh.. yes? A-am I not supposed to be here? Im sorry. Im just waiting for Y-"
"Oh, no. I just want to ask you. Wheres the bathroom?"
"Huh?" Y/N looks at the guy curiously. Is he for real? He had a three day back to back concert here and today is the third day. And he doesnt know where the bathroom is? And he is asking... her? Y/N laughs before answering. So weird.
"Uh.. I-"
Smack.
"You know very well where the bathroom is you idiot. What are you talking about?" Yoongi who just came back smacked the guy's head.
"Ouchhh, hyunggg," he pouted, rubbing his head.
"Serves you right. Thats the worse and most cringy pick up line ever!"
"Hyunggggg, shut upppp," the guy eyed Y/N shyly and glares at his hyung and turn his attention back on her. "S-sorry. I just wanted to talk to you but I dont want to scare you off," he grins sheepishly.
"Oh, its okay. Im not a stalker. I'm here because Yoongs invited me. I'm Y/N," she hands out her hand for a handshake. "And no, I dont know where the bathroom is," she giggles.
Yoongi rolls his eye and smacks his forehead at the lame attempt of flirting the younger man is doing.
"Hi Y/N. I'm Taehyung," he grips her hand and shakes it. "Kim Taehyung. And I'm the guy you will be having coffee with tonight," he grins.
/////
"Okay, so do you have a boyfriend?"
"No appa, I dont," Y/N sighs, frustrated.
"Then uh.... do you not like men? I mean, Im okay with that sweetheart, as long as you are happy..."
Y/N smile a little. Her appa is the most adorable man ever existed.
"Appa, no!" She giggles.
"Okay, okay. Im just asking. You know I will support you always princess," her appa smile and she can see a small sigh of relieve. "Then what is it sweetheart? Why are you so against this marriage with Hyun Dae?"
"Well, for one, I think arranged marriage is so old school appa," she pouts. "We are not living in the 60s or 20s or whatever year you and eomma are from,"
"How old do you think we are? The 20s?!" Her appa laughs. "Arranged marriage is not so bad you know,"
"Its not bad at all. I actually found the love of my life," her eomma gets up from the couch and link arms with her husband. "Although he is quite annoying at first," she laughs. Y/N's appa leans and kiss the top of her mothers head.
"Its the best decision ever," he smiles.
Y/N roll her eyes. It is well known between their family, friends and community that her parents are as in love as ever. They were from two wealthy family, arranged to be married, and lucky for them, they were each other soulmates.
"Appa, eomma, just because you two are lucky doesnt mean everyone is,"
"But sweetheart, Hyun Dae is everything a man can be. Hes very kind, smart, hes taking over his appa's business, he loves animals, arts, kids. Everything that you like. And plus, you two are quite close too. Why are you so against it?"
Y/N sighs.
"I dont know. Maybe a little part of me wants that traditional love story you know? To fall madly in love with someone and then get married?" She sighs and lays her head on her elbow. Her parents look at each other before her eomma approached her slowly, stroking her hair slowly.
"Sweetheart... are you in love with someone?"
"Well..." Y/N scratched her neck, avoiding their intrusive eyes. Her lips immediately curl into a small smile as an image immediately pops inside her head. Boxy smile, deep voice, always happy, positive outlook on everything. The one guy who made her deeply fall in love.
"Oh my dear, who is it? Why didnt you tell us?" Her eomma smile widely, clapping her hand in excitement.
"Well.. its uh.. because I dont know if he feels the same way..."
"Have you told him yet? Whoever this lucky person is?" Her appa take a step closer to her, smiling. His princess' happiness is everything to him.
"N-no. Not yet. I dont know. Should I?"
"You should sweetheart. Or how else would he know? And he most definitely feels the same way,"
"Do you think so appa?"
"I know so," he smiles. "Who in the world wouldnt fall in love with you sweetheart?"
Y/N smiles. Her parents are the best.
"Then I'll tell him. I'll tell him tomorrow,"
/////
"I like you Taehyung,"
A few moments past without either one saying anything. The air that pricks her skins feels colder. But nothing is colder that Taehyung's stare that is emotionless in front of her right now.
"Uh.. what? I heard you wrong I think," he laughs awkwardly.
"I... like you Taehyung,"
"Well, I like you too. Of course. You are one of my closest friends," Taehyung smiles. Y/N feels her heart suffocating but still puts on a brave face. Maybe he dont understand what she meant. Taehyung can be oblivious sometimes.
"I like you Taehyung," Y/N says it much clearer this time. "I.. love you. I love you Kim Taehyung. Like for real,"
"Listen..," he sighs after a few moment of silence. "I'm really flattered that you uh.. have feelings for me. And I know we have developed some degree of friendship, but... you thats what you are... just a friend," he looks at her with his deep gaze. "Yoongi's hyung friend to be exact,"
"Yoongi's friend?" Y/N looks at him, eyes filled with confusion. "After all this time. Is that all I am to you Tae? Your hyung's friend?"
"You know what I mean Y/N. You know how we met-"
"Yeah, I know how we met Tae.. but I though after all these time and moments we had..."
"That I would think of you as more? That I would fall in love with you?" Taehyung sighs. "I'm sorry if you felt like I lead you on. Thats just me. I'm just friendly. Im this way with everyone. But come on Y/N. Look at the facts. How can I be with you? I'm a worldstar, and you are well... you,"
Y/N felt like Taehyung just stabbed hee heart a million times. What does he mean that shes just.. her? Whats so wrong about being her?
"I enjoy our friendship, our interaction Y/N, but no more than that. And I am sorry to say that I am in a relationship. We havent gone public yet, but we are planning to, by this week,"
"I-in a relationship? With who Tae? A-and you didnt even bother to tell me? After all the time we spent together?" Y/N feels like screaming, but she knows she has no right to do so. All she can do is hold in her tears that can easily burst at any time.
"I think you know her," he smiles. Oblivious to the pain that Y/N is feeling. "Oraia. The new idol,"
"Oraia?" Oh Y/N knows the girl perfectly well. Pretty, fashionable, great at singing, dancing. Any guy would kill to have her. Including Taehyung it seems.
"I-I have to know Tae. W-why her? H-how?" Y/N managed to choked out her question.
"Oraia is the perfect girl for me," Taehyung smile at the thoughts of her, proving how in love he is, making Y/N's heart breaks even more. "An idol, beautiful, talented, shes basically the female version of me. So I'm sorry, but you..." Taehyung stops, trying to find the right word to describe what hes saying. "You and me Y/N... we are just worlds apart,"
"You are not a worldstar when I met you. You are not that like this when I met you," Y/N said softly, holding in tears. "We are not that much different from each other Tae,"
Taehyung gave a sad smile, no, a pity smile, before standing up, ready to leave.
"You can think whatever you want Y/N. But if you ever think we can be together..." he sighs and looks at her and gave her another pity smile. "If only things were different. In another world, maybe we would have been together.Goodbye Y/N,"
/////
Y/N closes her eyes, tears rolling down both her cheeks, already mixed together with the pouring rain as she walks home. Maybe the rain will wash away her feelings for Taehyung. Her stupid feelings for Taehyung. Different world? Taehyung's world is what she wanted to avoid her whole life. Glitz, glamour, fame, riches... Y/N cries out as loud as her heart wanted, thankful no one can hear her in the heavy rain. Shes just not enough for him. Thats the real reason. And she will never be for Kim Taehyung.
Days passed and Y/N has been locked up in her room ever since that disasterous day. Her parents have given up trying to find out what happen and finally left her alone.
And this week is finally the week Y/N dread the most. All the entertainment news, magazines, gossip websites are buzzing with the announcement that has just been made all week.
Y/N looks at the glossy pictures of the scattered tabloids in front of her again. The intimate pictures getting blurry as her eyes gets wetter. Taehyung's voice replayed in her brain like a broken record.
"That I would think of you as more? That I would fall in love with you?" Taehyung sighs. "I'm sorry if you felt like I lead you on. Thats just me. I'm just friendly. Im this way with everyone. But come on Y/N. Look at the facts. How can I be with you? I'm a worldstar, and you are well... you,"
"An idol, beautiful, talented, shes basically the female version of me. So I'm sorry, but you..." Taehyung stops, trying to find the right word to describe what hes saying. "You and me Y/N... we are just worlds apart,"
With a deep breath, she crumples the pages that reflects the beautiful relationship that is Taehyung and Oraia, wipe her eyes and walked downstairs to where her parents are drinking tea, enjoying their evening in their luxurious lounge.
"Oh Y/N. You are finally out. How are you feeling honey? Want to join us sweetheart?" Her mother looked up from the magazine shes reading and smile, her father the same, offering her a seat besides them.
"N-no. Thanks though. And I feel better," she gave a small smile. "Eomma, appa, I have something to tell you guys," she said, heart beating fast.
"What is it honey?"
"Appa, eomma, I have thought it through. I agree to your proposal. I agree with the arranged marriage to Hyun Dae,"
Her parents looks at each other, surprised.
"Sweetheart, are you sure? You dont have to rush into this. You should take your time and think i-"
"No appa. I am sure this time," she gave a smile, hoping it would convince them. "I want to marry Hyun Dae. I think he and I will make a very happy marriage,"
"W-well.." her eomma looks unsure. "Okay.. then,"
"If you are sure sweetheart. Then we will start setting it up," her appa stood up and hugs her. "Just know that we both love you so much and want nothing but your happiness,"
Y/N nods slowly, tears brimming in her eyes, softly she whispers,
"Me too appa, me too..,"
/////
Tupp. Tupp.
Y/N looks over the sliding door that opens up to her huge balcony. What is that sound? Panicking, she grab the first thing she can reach, a hairbrush, and walk slowly to the glass sliding door.
Tupp. Tupp.
The sound continue. Taking a deep breath she bravely slides open the door.
"Ouchhh," she rubs her head. "What the hell?" She looks around to find what hit her. "A pebble?"
"Oh no, did I hit you?" A voice called out. Y/N looks over the balcony.
"Hyun Dae? What are you doing here? Its 2am!"
"I, uh.. I want to talk to you," he grins.
"Theres this thing call a telephone you know? Or a front door? Havent use one of those?" She glares and Hyun Dae laughs.
"Sorry. I just thought this Romeo and Juliet shit is romantic you know?" He laughs and Y/N rolls her eyes. "Can you come down? Lets take a walk in your garden,"
"Come down from here? Like Rapunzel?!"
Hyun Dae laughs. "Oh my god, how are you so adorable? Of course not! Use the front door silly,"
Y/N giggles. "Okay. Be right there,"
A few minutes later, they were strolling in Y/N's family flower garden, inhaling the fresh night air.
"So? What is it you want to talk about that cant wait until daylight?"
"Well," Hyun Dae stop walking and pull her hand, sitting her down on the stone bench. "I just want to do it properly and formally," he smiles and kneels down in front of her, holding her hand.
Y/N looks at him, both nervous and confused.
"Y/N, you dont know how truly happy, grateful, excited, speechless, ecstatic I am that you agreed to marry me. I have been in love with you since forever," he smiles and blush slightly. "And I know this is just an arranged marriage to you, and you dont love me. But right here, right now, I promise you, that I will make you the happiest girl alive, that I will love you despite everything and anything, and everything you wish for princess, is my command,"
Y/N feels her heart beats faster.
"L/N Y/N, will you marry me and make me the luckiest man ever lived?"
Without a doubt, without a single second of hesitation, she nodded.
"Yes, yes, definitely yes,"
/////
"You look distracted. Whats wrong?" Yoongi glance at Taehyung whos just staring blankly at his mirror as they are changing and cleaning up their makeup.
"Uh... nothing hyung," Taehyung quickly pretends to clean up his things.
"Its not nothing. You have been distracted for a few weeks now. I didnt want to say anything because I thought you would snap out of it but its just getting worse,"
"Its really nothing hyung!" Taehyung snaps and plop down on his chair, sighing. Yoongi shrugs and decide to give him some space. "Err.. hyung?"
"Yeah?"
"Why..uh... why doesnt Y/N come over to our shows anymore?" Taehyung finally open up his mouth to ask. Since that first time they met, she has always been around, cheering for them, right at the front row. But after her confession, he didnt see her anymore. Yeah, he felt bad about what he said and he tried calling, texting, video calling.. but nothing. Shes totally ignoring him. He wanted to meet her at her house, or her work place, until he realized he didnt know where to go. In fact, he didnt know anything about her. All the time they hung out, he only always talk about him. His life, his problems. Him. As if its that interesting. He sighs again.
Yoongi side eyed him.
"Is that what disturbing you? Y/N?"
"N-no. Im just curious,"
"Oh, okay then. Then the answer is, I dont want to tell you," Yoongi picks up his stuff and walk off.
Of course. Of course his hyung knows. Yoongi and Y/N are best friends afterall. Taehyung sighs. Well, maybe he deserves this. But still... he doesnt want to admit it to anybody, even himself, but deep down, he miss her. Really miss her.
/////
"Okay guys, lets go. We need to get ready," Namjoom clap his hands as a way to make his members make their way to the dressing room. Its awards season finally, and they need to get ready for their stage. Taehyung makes his way with his hyung to the back of the stage, wishing for all this to be over soon. He really wants to just rest his head.
As he was putting on the final touches he turns to the door and saw Y/N standing there, all dressed in a beautiful gown, fit for an award show. His first thought is, wow, and the second is that his eyes are playing tricks on him. But as Y/N makes her way inside and hugs Yoongi, he knows this is reality. Taehyung smiles. He cant help it. Did Yoongi told her about what he said a few days back and now shes here to see him?
Taehyung walks over the moment he gets the chance to get her alone.
"Hey," Taehyung smiles.
"Um.. hey," Y/N smiles awkwardly.
"So, why are you here? You miss me or something? Or are you stalking me?" He laughs.
"No, I'm actually h-"
"Hey baby, there you are. The crew said you went in first," A handsome guy, and obviously a chaebol makes his way to them, giving Y/N a kiss on the cheek and hugging her waist.
"Hi babe," she smiles. "Yeah, I went in to see Yoongi. Its time you meet my mysterious bestie,"
Taehyung was silenced, eyeing the man up and down. Baby? Cheek kissing? Waist hugging? Who is this guy?
"Oh is this Yoongi?" He smiles and held out a hand. Taehyung took it reluctantly.
"Oh no no. This is Kim Taehyung. Hes uh... Yoongi's band member,"
Yoongi's band member? Thats all he is??
"Oh okay. Hi, I'm Hyun Dae," he smiles and shakes Taehyung's hand before hugging Y/N's waist again. Taehyung felt like pulling off his arm, and he dont know why he felt that way.
"Lets go meet Yoongi," Y/N smiles and bows to him and move over to Yoongi, leaving Taehyung still staring at them. Once Yoongi and Hyun Dae are caught up in a conversation, Taehyung immediatly grab Y/N by the elbow and drag her to the side.
"Ouchh. What the hell Tae?!"
"Are you seriously this petty?" Taehyung scoffs.
"Petty?? What are you even talking about?"
"Fine, I rejected you. So now you are bringing this... this... stuck up someone here for what? To show me that you have moved on? To make me jealous?" Taehyung scoffs again. "As if,"
"What?!" Y/N looks at him in disbelief. "God Taehyung, you are so full of yourself! Hes not stuck up! And I'm not here for you!"
"Yeah right," Taehyung smile sarcastically. "So, hyung told you I asked and the next show you brought a man over? Please Y/N, have some pride,"
"What are you even talking about? Yoongs never talked about you. At all! Im here becaus-"
"Oh Taehyung, you have already met," his manager interrupted the conversation and bows to Y/N as Hyun Dae join her side. "Okay guys, gather round. I think all of you must already know about The Empire. As you know, their company owns and organized all show events in Korea and is one of the biggest in the music industry, among others. The president cant make it, so his daughter is here instead. And she and her fiancee just wants to meet all the artists her tonight to express their gratitude,"
Y/N and Hyun Dae bows and smiles to everyone as Taehyung stands frozen in place, the only thing he can hear is 'fiance'. Y/N is... engaged?
And... shes an heir?
"You and me Y/N... we are just worlds apart,"
Yeah, they are worlds apart. He was right. But the truth is, Taehyung is the one whos way beneath her.
/////
"Lets go, lets go peopleeee," Namjoon clapped his hands a sign for them to get moving. Taehyung and the rest of the members climbed up their black van, still yawning from having to wake up early in the morning. They are off to another country for a month for their variety show shoot. A special content, the management said. Something to do with their new sponsors. Taehyung never really pay attention to all the boring details, all he knows is, he will do what he is asked to do, no question asked.
But as they land and making their way out from their private plane, Taehyung, still half asleep, need to take a double take when he saw Y/N and her fiance at the arrivals, standing atound with the crew, their luggage all around them.
"H-hyung?" He nervously tapped Yoongi's shoulder.
"What?" Yoongi grumbled, still cranky from being awaken from his beauty sleep on the plane.
"Are my eyes playing tricks on me or is that uh... Y/N?" Taehyung really wished he has gone crazy. Thats he is seeing things. That Yoongi will look at him funny and tell him theres no Y/N. And Yoongi did look at him funny, but his answer is totally not what hes expecting.
"Dont you know? Her father's company is our new sponsor for the show and they are here to monitor the shoot,"
Taehyung stopped in his tracks. He dont know why the news startled him. It shouldnt be affecting him at all. Right? Even he dont understand what he is feeling as he looked over to Y/N and Hyun Dae smiling at each other. Anger? Sadness? Happy? He cant be sure. But one thing he knows for sure, its going to be one hell of a month.
/////
"So... you arent going to tell me that you are engaged?" Taehyung jogged lightly, to catch up with Y/N whom he saw is taking a morning walk from his hotel roon window. They have free schedule for the first day and what luck, the first thing he saw this morning is Y/N, alone. Without that stupid chaebol.
"Oh, uh hi Taehyung," Y/N, startled at his presence, give a small smile and a polite bow.
"Hi Y/N," he smile. Honestly, he missed her. Well, they were pretty close before. As friends. Yes, of course as friends and nothing more! Taehyung reminded himself. "But seriously, you are never going to tell me you are engaged?"
"Do I have to?" Y/N raised an eyebrow. "I mean, I'm not even sure if I'm your friend or yoongis friend or whatever, you know? And I dont think you be interested to know anyway," she picked up her pace but Taehyung managed to catch up.
"What do you mean?! Of course I wanna know! And of course we are friends! And you didnt think to tell me that you father own half of Korea's music industry?" He chuckled, trying to lighten the mood.
"Well, you never ask. And I'm not one to go around telling people my family history Tae," she shrugged. "Afterall, why would a worldstar want to know about someone who is from a different world than him, right?"
Okay, he deserved that.
"Okay, Y/N, look," he pull her hand, stopping her from walking. "I am sorry about what I said that day. I dont know what I was thinking. I was startled by your confession. To be honest, the months I spent without seeing you at all, well... I missed you. I miss you, okay?"
Y/N sighed. Why is he doing this to her? Her heart is still recovering. Still trying to erased every love she felt for him.
"We are going to spend a whole month working together. Stuck in a small island. Why dont we be friends again? Hmm?" He made his famous puppy eyes, blinking his eyes rapidly, lips pouting. "Pleaaaase? Taetae is sorrryy,"
Y/N tried to keep a sttaight face but burst out laughing. She can never say no to that face.
"Fine Tae. You know I cant resist that stupid face," she laughs.
"So, friends?" Taehyung held out a hand and Y/N shakes it.
"Of course, friends,"
As he shakes her hand, smiling ear to ear, Taehyung realized, he had never felt this happy, and it scared him.
/////
They might have rekindled their friendship, but Taehyung couldnt get even 10 minutes alone with her without being disturbed by Yoongi or Hyun Dae, and its pissing him off. Worse, he have to watch all the romantic moments between the two love birds, and trust him, Hyun Dae is really not afraid to show his affection, its making him wants to throw up.
Suprising Y/N with flowers on set, setting up a special candle light dinner when the whole crew is eating, suddenly gets on stage in the middle of dinner and sing her a song. And that motherfucker can even play a guitar and he look damn good playing it too. Taehyung swore all the girls there are swooning over him. But what he hates most is all the admiring whispers.
"Y/N is so lucky"
"Hyun Dae is the perfect guy"
"I wish I was Y/N"
Urghhh. Annoying.
It also doesnt help that his relationship with Oraia has gone stale. Yeah, they text everyday, call each other every night. But nothing she says interest him. Taehyung mostly tune out whatever shes saying during their phone calls, eyes focusing on what Y/N is doing. The way she laughs when she talks to someone, her clusmy ways of doing things, her passion while working. All that is more interesting to him than his own girlfriend. His supppsedly perfect, beautiful, girlfriend.
It must be the island. He hasnt seen Oraia for almost a month now, and hes stuck here for all that time. Of course it will put a strain on his relationship. Yes, that must be it.
But as his heart bubbles with jealousy as he watches Y/N and Hyun Dae running around the beach, Hyun Dae catching Y/N by the waist and lift her up to kiss her, Taehyung knows for sure, that it is definitely not it.
/////
Taehyung tossed and turned for hours and after eventually still failing to fall asleep, he decide to take a walk by the beach. The moon is out and the breeze is welcoming. Its a good night to walk and collect his thoughts.
As he walked slowly along the beach, the cool air blowing his hair, he saw a figure sitting alone by the beach, eyes closed, enjoying the midnight breeze. Taehyung immediately smile.
Y/N.
"Hey," he approached her slowly and smile.
"Oh, Tae. Hi," she smiled back. "What are you doing here at this hour?"
"I cant sleep. What about you? Isnt it dangerous for a pretty girl to be alone so late at night?" He smile.
Y/N laughs.
"Its a private island Tae. I think its kinda safe. And you know I usually cant sleep and the sound of the ocean calms me down,"
Taehyung does know that. Back to the days when they use to spend so much time together, they always sit by the beach and talked. Well, usually, he will be the one who do the talking, because all he cares about is himself. And his problems. And Y/N always listen. To all his weird ramblings, his peculiar thoughts that people usually laugh at. Even Oraia sometimes makes fun of him. But Y/N listen to them all. Understand him even. Why didnt he realized that before?
"Well... can I join you?"
"Of course. Have a seat," she patted down the spot besides her and Taehyung makes himself comfortable. They talked and talked, laughter filled up the night air and Taehyung cant seem to care about anything else other than that moment.
"Oh god, my tummy is hurting from laughing so much," Y/N said, still giggling from what Taehyung said. "I forgot how funny and weird you are Taetaeee,"
Taehyung smile and looked at her, staring deeply at her laughing face.
"Its nice,"
"What is?" Y/N who has stopped laughing, asked him, confused.
"Hearing you call me Taetae again," he smile, making Y/N blushed.
"W-well, that is your name,"
"Yeah, yeah. It is," Taehyung smile, still staring at her. "Y/N? Are you happy?"
"Right now? Yeah I am. We have been laughing for hours Tae. Of course Im happy. Whats wrong with you?" Y/N giggles, trying to toned down the awkwardness shes starting to feel.
"No. I mean, are you happy? Like really happy? With Hyun Dae? Does he makes you happy?"
"H-hyun Dae?" Y/N was taken aback from the sudden question. "Uhh, of course I am, hes my fiance, of course he makes me happy Tae,"
"Really? Then why did you stutter?" Taehyung still looks at her, straight into her eyes with his sharp gaze.
"I- I did not stutter! Whats wrong with you Tae? You are being weird. But not normal weird," Y/N starts to dust off the sand off her, preparing to get up. "Its getting late. We should go in,"
Taehyung grab her hands, standing up with her.
"Do you love him? Do you love Hyun Dae?"
"Why are you asking me that Tae? You are being weird!" Y/N tries to shake off his grip but he held on tighter.
"Answer the question Y/N. Do you love him?"
"Hyun Dae is amazing! He cares for me. He loves me. He knows what I like, sweet, romantic, p-"
"But do you love him?"
"I-I," Y/N stuttered. "I dont need to answer that!" Y/N tries to pull her hand again but to no avail.
"You cant answer it because you dont love him. And you cant lie to me," Taehyung smile.
"You are crazy. Let my hand go Tae," Y/N insisted. "It has nothing to do with you!"
"But it does Y/N. It does, because you dont love him. Because you love me," Taehyung state matter of factly. "You always did and you always will Y/N,"
Y/N was speechless, shocked, surprised, that Taehyung would bring it up again. Tears starts to sting her eyes. She has never felt more hummiliated. Is Taehyung making fun of her? Of her feelings? She thought they were friends again. Why is he doing this to her?
"Just let me go!"
"I cant, and I wont,"
"Why?!" Y/N is crying now. She dont understand why Taehyung is being this way. "To hummiliate me even more? To make fun of my feelings for you?"
"What? No!" Taehyung cant believe Y/N would think of him to be that cruel. But maybe he deserved it. "Because I love you Y/N!" Taehyung pull her hands, making her fall into his arms and he immediately cup her face and captured her lips with hers. The kiss has never felt more electricfying. Taehyung felt goosebump all over his body, he hears fireworks went off everywhere. And right at that moment, he knows that hes in love.
But the moment only last for a split second when Y/N, tears already spilled down her cheeks pushed him away hard and slapped him across the face.
"Get away from me Kim Taehyung!"
Was the last word she screamed out before she ran away into the darkness.
/////
Taehyung almost went crazy trying to finish the rest of the shooting. After that fateful night, Y/N took the earliest flight home the next morning, leaving Taehyung with no way to contact her at all. No reply to his texts or his calls and he cant even get away from his stupid schedule to find her at home. He was lost.
Its the very first time in his life that he has seen things so clearly. He is in love with Y/N. And she left him being so lost.
It also doesnt help that after Taehyung told Oraia that he wants to break up, his crazy ex girlfriend bombared his calls, his texts, his friends, even his manager with texts begging to take her back. She even went so far as to include the media, giving sad interviews, crying her eyes out. Taehyung wondered how he didnt notice how crazy Oraia is. Maybe its true what they said, love is blind. But what they had isnt love. It never was. They both know they got together just because they seemed to look perfect for each other. Thats not love, and Oraia is just mad that shes no longer one half of the industry perfect couple.
/////
"Hey Tae?" Yoongi knocks on his hotel room, peeking his head. Theres still a week left of shooting, but Taehyung's heart is no where in it. All he wanted to do is to go back home, find Y/N and begged for her forgiveness until she takes her back. Hes going to convince her that he loves her. He really do. And not because he pity her, or because hes jealous of her relationship with Hyun Dae, but because he just realized it now. That from that moment he asked her where the bathroom is, hes already in love. Y/N has already caught his eyes, and heart from that first night at the concert, but he is too busy chasing his fame and title to realized it.
And now it might be too late.
Taehyung might have already lost the love of his life, forever.
"Yeah hyung?" Yoongi make his way in and sit on Taehyung's bed.
"Did something happen between you and Y/N? Did she going back home early has anything to do with you?"
Taehyung looked at his hyung with tired eyes. No longer bother to pretend or curious why his hyung us asking.
I told her I love her...." Taehyung said, tears stinging his eyes at the memory. "And she thinks I'm just playing her,"
Yoongi sighed.
"Are you?"
Taehyung sits up and hugs a pillow, looking at Yoongi with teary eyes.
"No hyung. Of course not. I really do love her. I love her so much. Im just too stupid to realized it then," he sniffles. "And now, I have to wait until this stupid shoot is over to win her back hyung, because shes not answering my calls or my texts. And I swear hyung, I will do everything to win her back from that Hyun Dae,"
Yoongi sighs again, looking away before looking back at the younger man.
"Tae... Y/N is getting married today. She suddenly said she wants to get married as soon as possible, doesnt matter if its a small wedding. She just wants to get married. Today,"
Taehyung looked at his hyung, eyes widen, not believing what hes hearing.
"I-I have to go hyung," he suddenly gets up.
"Go where Tae? What are you doing?"
Taehyung grabs his bag, not thinking anymore.
"To stop the wedding hyung, to win back the love of my life,"
/////
Y/N looks at her reflection in the mirror. Even with last minute preparations, her mother managed to do everything perfectly. Her dress, her makeup, her hair, her flowers, even her dressing room is perfect. Y/N smile to her reflection. But she knows its only superficial. Its a smile she puts on to convince everyone, to convince herself, that shes making the right decision. The right choice.
That shes happy.
And she know Hyun Dae will make her happy.
He have to.
"Dont marry him,"
Y/N turns around to find Kim Taehyung by the door. His hair a mess, shirt crumpled, eyes bloodshot from crying.
"T-Tae..."
"Dont marry him Y/N," he move closer to her. "Dont do it. Please. Please Y/N,"
"Taehyung, what are you doing here?" Y/N feel tears prickling her eyes. Why is he here. Why now? Why today?
"To tell you I love you Y/N," Taehyung sniffles and take her hand. "T-to tell you to not marry him. Dont marry him Y/N,"
"I-I cant Tae," Y/N shakes her head. "Hyun Dae deserves all the happiness in the world. He treats me so good Tae,"
"Then what about you? You deserve happiness too. Happiness with me Y/N,"
Y/N close her eyes and shakes her head. Why is Taehyung telling her all the things shes dying to hear before? But its all too late now. Too late.
"Marry me Y/N. Marry me. And I'll make you the happiest woman in the world. Marry me," Taehyung sobs and kneel down on his knees, begging, hand still holding hers.
Y/N starts to shake, trying to hold in her tears but it rolled out anyway, flooding her face.
"D-dont do this to me Tae. You dont love me. You dont. You dont!"
"I love you Y/N. I love you I love you I love you! I know I realized it too late. And thats my mistake. But I swear to you, that I'll spend forever making it up to you," Taehyung begs desperately. He cant lose her. He cant! "Please. Please, dont marry him Y/N. Please..."
Y/N closes her eyes. Tears rolling down her face, no intention of stopping. She wanted to say yes. God, how she wanted to say yes. How easy it would be. To be with the man he love. The man he had dreamed of. But she cant. Its not fair to Hyun Dae. And its not fair to her. To her heart that Taehyung has broken to pieces.
"Im sorry Taehyung... I cant," Y/N let go of his hand, tears dropping on the floor, wetting her beautiful white dress.
Taehyung felt like his whole world shattered to pieces. Thats it. Just two words. "I cant" and he lost her. He lost the love of his life.
After felt like an eternity, he stood up, face still wet with tears but a smile on his face.
"You look beautiful Y/N," he smile. "You always do.
Y/N sobs hard, her whole body shakes.
"Be happy Y/N. Hes an idiot if he dont take care of you. If he hurt you like I do. Hes an absolute idiot," Taehyung smile and carressed her face softly. "Be happy my princess. And when the time comes, come back to me. I'll always be waiting Y/N, because you are my true love, and we will always find our way back to each other,"
Taehyung placed a long, deep kiss on her forehead, eyes closed as tears flows down, knowing he has lost the love of his life, trying to savor the feel of her in his memories.
"I love you Y/N. And I'll wait for you, forever," he smile one last time as he turns around and walk away, leaving Y/N drenched in her tears.
/////
5 YEARS LATER
"Woohoooo, last concert for this tour guys, good job!" The members high five each other as they make their way into the dressing room backstage. Taehyung laughs and make his way into his own personal room, exhausted from a show well done.
"Hi, do you know where the bathroom is?"
Taehyung stopped in his track at the sound of the voice. A voice so familiar. A voice that haunts his dream for years. A voice that he never forgets.
He looks up, and there she is. Smiling at him.
"Y-Y/N?"
Y/N nods, giggling.
"Y/N?!" Taehyung runs to her and engulf her in a hug. "I am not dreaming am I? A-are you really here?"
Y/N giggles again.
"Its me Tae. Real life me. Im real,"
"W-why? H-how?"
"Well, if Im not mistaken, 5 years ago, someone told me that we will always find our way back to each other. And that he will wait for me, forever. Im just checking if he still keeps his promise," Y/N grins.
Taehyung hugs her tight.
"You dont know how I dream of this day every single day Y/N. How I waited to see you again. To feel you again. To hear your voice again," Taehyung hugs her, not letting go.
"Ive come back Taehyung. Ive come back to you,"
Taehyung cant believe this is happening. Then he remembered something. And although its something hes dreading to ask, he knows he has to know.
"H-Hyun Dae?"
Y/N smile at his nervous state. She has never seen someone so adorable. God, shes just so in love with him.
"We were never married Tae. When you came that day... everything changed. I didnt marry him. I couldnt. Not when I know my heart belongs to you. And Hyun Dae... he knows it too. And he loves me enough to let me find my own happiness,"
"W-what?"
"Im sorry it took so long. But I need to find myself. To really understand my feelings, your feelings... but Im here now, Taehyung... if you still want me..."
Taehyung grins.
"Is that even a question my love?"
Y/N giggles at the way he calls her.
"I love you Y/N. Since that first night we met. I have been yours. Im sorry for hurting you. Im sorry for my mistakes. Im sorry fo-"
"Shhhh," she puts a finger on his lips. "It doesnt matter anymore Tae. All of it doesnt matter anymore," she smile. "Im here now. You are here now. And I, I love you Kim Taehyung,"
Taehyung grins. Such word has never felt so sweet. He felt happiness bubbling inside his chest. And in the first time in 5 years, he really mean it.
"I love you Y/N, my love, my soulmate,"
"I love you Taehyung. You really had me at bathroom," she giggles.
"Oh shut up," Taehyung laughs and lifts her up, wrapping her legs around him. "Just shut up and kiss me. Just kiss me baby,"
And she really did.
#bts#bangtan boys#bangtan seonyeondan#bts fiction#bts fanfic#kim taehyung#bts v#taehyung scenario#taehyung angst#taehyung fiction#kpop#kpop fanfic#kpop scenario#bts jungkook#jeon jungkook#jungkook fanfic#jungkook angst
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Unknown (A Sterek Wrong Number/Celebrity AU)
11.09 PM Unknown Number
>I’m writing songs about you again.
11.20 PM Unknown Number
>its stiles btw.
>in case you deleted my number
>I did.
>I mean I deleted yours.
>but I still remember it apparently
11:41 PM Unknown Number
>I only have 2 lines so far
11:57 PM Unknown Number
>I bleed you from my veins.
>I grieve you like I love you.
>alone.
>its better with the chords.
>u were always better at writing lyrics than me
12:34 AM Unknown Number
>u were better everything than me
2:00 AM Unknown Number
>I hate that I miss you
2:07 AM Unknown Number
>do u want to hook up?
>I promise not to propose again
2:15 AM Unknown Number
>im sorry.
>ignore me.
>im drinking
Derek blinked bleary eyes. His phone screen was the only source of light in his room, as he read through the flurry text messages.
What the hell is a Stiles?
2:17 AM Unknown Number
<I think you have the wrong number
>Lydia?
<no
>oh thank fuck
>I mean
>I’m sorry
>for disturbing ur sleep
>but im just glad I didn’t drunk text my ex all of this
>bullet dodged right?
>is this what near death experiences feel like?
<I wouldn’t know.
>of course
>hey
>seeming as I have you here can I ask you a quick q?
>all my friends are asleep
<probably because its 3am
<everyone’s asleep
>2.39
>and ur not
>asleep that is
>so?
>I’ll take your silence as a go ahead
>what do you think?
>of the lyrics
<im the wrong person to ask
>never experienced heartbreak?
<no
<all song lyrics just look like bad poetry to me
>oh
>yeah I guess it does
>not everyone can be Rupi Kaur tho right?
<do you want to be rupi kaur?
>sure
>not to be dramatic or anything
>but
>I want to be anyone but me
>think id rather be someone like regina spektor tho
<regina spektor?
>singer/song writer
>shes my fucking inspiration
>her lyrics are like poetry to me
>you should listen to her music
<I dont really listen to music
>what the fuck?
>are you an alien?
<no?
>nice fucking try ET
>thats exactly what an alien would say
<…you got me there
>akdjfen
>is this you admitting I was right?
<no
<but this is me going to bed
<because its now 4AM
>already?
>fuck
>ive got an early start tomorrow
>good night random stranger
>and thanks
>for listening
>or reading ig
<good night
//
“You’re late.” Laura frowned, arms crossed.
“Are you going to let me in?” Derek grumbled, still feeling the affects of having stayed up until 4AM the previous night.
Laura didn’t argue she just stepped aside to let him through into her flat. “You’re grumpier than usual.” She noted.
“Didn’t sleep well.”
Derek hated the look she gave him then.
The look that said he was broken. The look that said she wanted to fix him.
“Is…Is it the nightmares again?” Laura’s voice dipped to a whisper, like the question alone would be enough to send him over the edge.
“No.”
An awkward silence defended over the two of them, neither knowing what to say.
Derek clung to the silence like a blanket, wishing things could go back to how they used to be. Back to when they knew how to speak to one another.
But this was enough.
It was enough to know that they were both trying. Failing. But trying.
//
2:40 PM Laura
>I’m here if you need to talk.
//
Derek isn’t good at art, but sometimes it’s the only way he can express himself. Words had never been his forte.
So instead he doodles.
Shitty toddler level doodles that he never shows anyone.
Sometimes he thinks if he could bring himself to show Laura she would like it. Maybe she would even understand it.
But there was a bigger chance that she wouldn’t, and he would feel even more like a stranger to his own sister than he already was.
//
10:18 PM Unknown Number
>I don’t remember it anymore
<You have the wrong number again
>No
>This is ‘not Lydia’ right?
<right
>So here’s the thing.
>I always thought if I needed to text her I could
>And I thought maybe I got her number wrong because I was drunk
>But I can’t remember it anymore
<Oh.
>I have some of her things still
>I don’t think I’ll ever get to return it now
>Unless she messages me first
<When did you two break up?
>Last year
>and I know what you’re thinking
>’it’s October’
>and I should be over her by now
>Trust me I know
>So you don’t need to lecture me
<I wasn’t going to
>Oh
<Stiles?
>That’s weird
<what is?
>I forgot I told you my name
<You should throw away the stuff she left behind.
>you’re right
>I don’t like it.
>but you’re right
>…thanks
<What for?
>for listening
>reading**
>my friends are pretty sick of hearing me complain
>so this is nice
<sure
<anytime
>dope
>no take backsies
<am I going to regret this?
>for definite
>you’re stuck with me now
//
That night Derek saves Stiles’ number as ‘Bad Poet’.
//
Stiles keeps messaging after that.
Stiles messages like they’ve been friends for years, and Derek very determinedly does not analyse why it is he always responds.
Even when there are messages dated from Laura from three days ago that he hasn’t even been able to bring himself to open yet.
He also ignores how when he’s messaging Stiles the gaping pit that had made residence in his chest feels just a little less inescapable.
//
Derek can’t bring himself to tell Stiles his name. He can’t bring himself open up, even though there’s a large part of him that wants to.
He’s not above admitting he’s scared.
//
Derek draws Stiles sometimes.
More accurately he draws a vague pair hands texting on a phone, because he has no idea what Stiles actually looks like.
Derek refuses to let himself dwell on that though, because they are happy drawings.
The pictures of Stiles are pretty much his only happy drawings right now.
//
They don’t always talk about Lydia.
Sometimes Stiles messages Derek song lyrics he’s working on.
Other times it’s memes, or just a bunch of emojis.
Once Stiles had just messaged him what Derek could only assume was a list of everything he had eaten that day.
Sometimes Stiles messages in rambles - and Derek can’t always keep up with the boy’s run away thoughts, but even then he never feels lost the way he does when he’s trying to interact with literally anyone else.
And sometimes it’s 2AM. Those are simultaneously Derek’s favourite and least favourite texts.
//
2:02 AM Bad Poet
>sometimes I feel like too much
>and too little
>at the same time
>u ever feel like that ET?
<not really
>its like I’m infinite, and meaningless
>like a never ending echo
>or a recurring decimal
>I just stretch on and on forever but theres no point to it
>I have no depth
<youre not meaningless
<you’re a rhythm.
<like breathing
>…
>was that a regina spektor reference?
<it might have been
>I thought you didn’t listen to music?
<well someone said her lyrics were like poetry
<so I thought I would check out a few songs
>well fuck
>what did you think?
<she’s good
>you spelt ‘amazing’ wrong
<I still prefer poetry
>of course you do
Derek stared at the texts an ache filling his chest.
Derek was the opposite of infinite. Everything he touched turned to flames.
//
10:30AM Bad Poet
<my sister bought me flower seeds
>I didn’t know you had a sister?
<she’s everything I have
>oh
<and I think she’s trying to trick me into therapy somehow
>…with flower seeds?
<yes
>you sound extremely paranoid
>maybe therapy wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world for you?
<shut up
>noted.
>keep me posted on how your gardening goes
>also
>as a side note
>you know you have me too right?
>if you ever need to talk or anything, I’m right here for you
<thanks
>anytime
//
On Derek’s birthday Laura insists the two of them spend the day together, and Derek knows better than to argue.
She buys him a cake and they spend hours sat next to one another silently. Two strangers desperately trying to keep hold of one another but with an ocean dividing them.
Once their family had been so alive.
And it was all Derek’s fault that was gone.
They both knew it.
Sometimes Derek wondered if Laura hated him as much as he did.
He was too scared to ask.
//
That night Derek chased the ache in his chest away with a drink.
And then several more followed.
//
1:14 AM Bad Poet
<seh haars me
>sorry bud, you’re going to have to try again
>try spell checking before hitting send
<she.hates mee
>who?
<larn
>are you drunk?
<yeh
<tyongs ndrf
*Out Going Call: Bad Poet*
The phone rings twice before being picked up. “Sorry. Stupid keyboard is so small. Impossible to type.” Derek mumbled, his words slightly muffled by his cheek being pressed into the sofa cushion.
“Wow. You’re really sloshed huh?”
“No.” Derek denied. “Just tipsy.”
“Right. So what was it you were trying to tell me? Someone hates you?”
“Laura.”
“Who’s Laura?”
“My sister.”
“Oh.”
“She looks at me like she wishes she could fix me.”
“That doesn’t sound like she hates you, bud.”
“She should. I can’t be fixed.”
“You’re right, because you’re not broken.”
Hearing Stiles say that Derek could almost believe it to be true.
“I mean it. You’re not broken. You’re just a different shape than you used to be. But the shape you are now is beautiful.”
Derek closes his eyes and lets the words wash over him. “Do you sing?” He finds himself asking.
“What?”
“I know you write songs, but do you ever sing?”
“Oh…” Stiles sounds uncomfortable. “I guess… Yeah. I do.”
Derek hummed in the back of his throat. “I bet you have a nice voice.”
“Th-thanks.”
Derek tried to say something else, but all that comes out is a yawn, which makes Stiles let out a jittery laugh.
Derek tries to memorise the sound of It, but it’s so fleeting, it’s already slipping away from him.
“I think you need to go sleep, ET.”
“Yeah.” Derek agrees.
“Goodnight bud.”
“Wait.”
“Yeah?”
“Could you stay on the phone? Just for a bit longer.” Derek clutched on to the phone like if he could grip tightly enough it would make Stiles stay.
I don’t want to be alone. The words die on Derek’s tongue.
“Sure.” Stiles didn’t hesitate. “Of course.”
“Thank you.”
Sleep pulled at Derek’s consciousness, unravelling his grip on reality.
“Stiles?”
Stiles hummed in answer.
“Your shape is beautiful too.”
A small whimper came from the other end of the phone. “Thanks.”
//
7:50 AM Bad Poet
>how are you feeling today?
<better
>good <3
Derek holds his phone tightly and wishes that he had more to say. Just to keep the conversation going.
He also wishes (not for the first time) that Stiles was more than a faceless entity on the other end of the phone.
But it’s the first time he feels the want like a physical ache in his chest.
Derek had never been good with words, but if Stiles was here in front of him Derek would probably give him a hug.
But everything Derek touches eventually dies, and a larger part of him is relieved for the distance.
//
Derek plants the seeds his sister got him that day.
//
9:48 PM Bad Poet
>would it totally weird you out if I wanted to do another phone call?
>don’t feel like you need to say yes
>I just enjoyed talking to you
>and hearing your voice
>ugh.
>why are words so hard?
<I wouldn’t be opposed to a phone call
*Incoming Call: Bad Poet*
“Hey.” Derek feels breathless as he answers the phone, anxious excitement clawing it’s way up his throat.
“Hey.” Stiles sounds equally out of breath, and that helps.
Derek chews on his lip, scrambling for something to say. “What did you want to talk about?”
“I don’t know.” Stiles admitted. “Anything.”
“Helpful.” Derek said sarcastically.
“I mean. There’s one thing. I didn’t want to ask when you were drunk because it felt a little like taking advantage. And I don’t want you to think you have to answer-”
“Stiles.” Derek interrupts before Stiles could break into a full blown ramble.
“Tell me your name.” Stiles breaks. “Please.”
Anxiety grips his heart. But… he couldn’t stay scared forever.
“It’s Derek.”
“Derek.” Stiles repeats his name in a reverent whisper, as if committing it to memory.
And hearing Stiles say his name makes everything worth it.
//
Phone calls become a regular thing between the two of them over the next month. Always between late in the evening and the early hours of the day.
//
The next time Derek spirals he doesn’t drink before he calls Stiles, but he does cry on the phone.
The next morning he wakes up to a text from Stiles.
6:42 AM Bad Poet
>you need to talk to your sister
And Derek knows he’s right.
//
It’s not easy confronting Laura. He has two separate anxiety attacks on the walk to her apartment alone.
But he forces himself to take the dive.
“It’s okay if you hate me.” He tells her, even though it’s not okay. Laura’s hate might be the only thing in the world that could break him beyond repair.
Laura looks horrified as she stares at him. “I don’t- Obviously I don’t hate you Derek.”
“It’s my fault that they’re gone.” Derek addresses the elephant in the room.
If he hadn’t fallen in love with Kate.
If he hadn’t broken up with her, just to try and prove a point when she refused to say ‘I love you’ back…
There never would have been a fire.
Their family would still be here if it wasn’t for him.
“Fuck that!” Laura let out a harsh noise. “Derek, none of this was ever your fault. You were a kid, and even if you weren’t… You never set the fire.”
“I might as well have.”
“No. If anyone… I was your big sister- am your big sister. But I was so fucking wrapped up in myself. I didn’t even know about Kate.”
The last time Derek had seen Laura cry it had been at the funeral, so it took a second to fully sink in what he was seeing.
He found himself crying to.
“I’m so sorry, Der.”
Derek stumbled forwards pulling Laura into a crushing hug. Laura hugs him back just as tight.
They spend hours refusing to let go of one another.
//
He realises he fell asleep on Laura’s sofa when he woke up to the sound of his phone ringing. But he had no idea where it was, and he was too tired to move.
He feels Laura moving and the sound of the phone ringing gets louder before cutting off abruptly.
“Hello?”
“No - Derek’s asleep.”
“Maybe call at a more reasonable time?”
“Who is this?”
“Your voice sounds familiar.”
“Right.”
“Okay. Bye.”
Derek let sleep over take him once more.
//
2:29 AM Bad Poet
>sorry for calling so late
>you’re asleep so I’ll just take to you tomorrow
//
9:07 AM Bad Poet
<sorry, I was really tried
>no worries man
>you’re allowed to have a life outside of me
<was something wrong?
>no I was just bored, and didn’t realise how late it had gotten
>im fine
>how are you?
<im good actually
<I spoke to Laura
>yeah?
>I’m proud of you
>how’d that go?
<we both cried
<a lot
<and I ended up falling asleep on her couch
>look at you, opening up and shit.
>think I might cry now
<shut up
>literally never
>better men have tried and failed to silence me
//
2:40 PM Laura
>Want to see a movie on Friday?
<sure
//
One night Stiles calls Derek just to say his name in stupid ways, and laugh himself stupid after each one.
“Duhreek.”
“Doreck.”
“Fuck. I’m getting a stitch from laughing.”
“You’re so fucking dumb.” Derek is smiling as he said it.
“Deeruk.” Stiles wheezes out.
Derek just closes hie eyes and listens.
“I’m so fucking glad I know you, Stiles.” The words fall out of Derek’s mouth without much thought.
He only realises the weight of his words when Stile’s laughter pulls to a stop.
“I uh-” Stiles stammered. “Me too. Fuck. You’re the best thing to happen to me in…so fucking long. I’m glad I know you too Derek.”
//
Derek finally admits to himself that night that he’d fallen at least a little in love with the stranger from the unknown number.
//
He keeps trying to draw Stiles, but he can’t. Vague shapes just don’t cut it anymore.
He wants to map Stiles out with his eyes and translate it onto the page.
He wants to be able to see the smile behind the laughter.
He wants.
//
1:58 AM Bad Poet
>do you think you day we’ll actually meet?
>maybe not intentionally
>maybe one day we’d pass each other in the streets and not even know
>maybe we already have
Derek couldn’t imagine a scenario where he wouldn’t notice Stiles.
<is there ever a moment when you’re not talking?
<I think id recognise your voice and know it was you
>maybe your face would make me speechless ;)
<I think id still know
<but if you want to be sure… I could send you a picture?
<of me
>dkfajd
>for reals?
>you would do that?
>you?
<well…not for free
>there’s always a catch
>what do you want?
>my soul?
>a blood debt?
>you can have whatever it is
<I meant you’d have to send me a picture too
<geez stiles
The next text takes an unnervingly long time to come through.
>I could do that
>a photo for a photo
>I kind of look like shit rn
>so no judging me
Derek spends the next two minutes fussing and fidgeting to take a good photo. No matter what angle he took it from the bags under his eyes were noticeable, and so was the week’s worth of stubble he had yet to shave off.
And maybe this was a terrible, awful, idea.
But Derek would send one hundred bad pictures if it meant getting to see one of Stiles.
He forced himself to press send on the last picture he took.
As he pressed send another photo came in.
Derek’s fingers shook as he hit the button to download the image.
His heart stopped.
Stiles was beautiful in every sense of the word, and Derek found himself unable to look away. Even when he heard the small dings of incoming messages.
But he couldn’t ignore them for long, because it was Stiles. And when ever Stiles messaged Derek had to answer.
>Fucking hell
>are you for real?
>you gave me a heart attack
>am I being catfished right now?
>when do you think you were going to tell me you’re the most fucking beautiful man to exist ever?
>how the hell to you look like that as 2AM!?
>Derek
>oh my god
>you gotta respond my dude because I’m freaking out a little bit
>still there?
>did my selfie scare you away?
>I would have tried harder for a nice photo if I knew I was talking to an adonis
>Derek?
<still here
>of thank fuck
>so…
<so?
>come on
>your going to give me a complex
>the selfie…was it okay?
>I know it’s not much
>but we can’t all be greek gods
<its beautiful
<you’re beautiful, stiles
>oh
>thanks
//
Derek is so far gone that he makes the picture of Stiles the home screen on his phone.
//
9:49 AM Bad Poet
<Laura wants me to meet her boyfriend
<this is all your fault
>how is this my fault?
<because she never wanted to introduce us before
<and then you got me to talk to my sister
<and now she wants me to meet him
>…and this is a bad thing?
<yes
>because?
<I don’t make good first impressions
<it’s going to be awkward
>yeah probably
<you’re not helpful
>I wasn’t trying to be ;)
>have fun, Derek!
//
Meeting Laura’s boyfriend wasn’t as awkward as Derek thought it was going to be. But it was strange.
Derek hadn’t been expecting to meet someone so soft and kind. He was nothing like any one that Laura had dated before.
But he also wasn’t used to seeing Laura smile as much as she did around him.
Maybe not all change was bad.
//
Derek tells Laura about Stiles by accident. Or more accurately he mentions Stiles once by accident (not even by name) and Laura had badgered him until he admitted that he had made a friend through a wrong number.
“There’s a lot of weirdos out there.”
“I know.”
God did Derek ever know.
But Stiles is different.
“Just…be careful.”
“I am being. I promise.”
Laura reluctantly lets it go after that. “So…what’s he like?”
“He’s…he’s like bad poetry.”
“Oh god. You’re in love with him aren’t you?”
Derek can’t bring himself to deny it, but he does tell Laura to shut up.
//
Derek fully embraces being in love with Stiles on the day he tells Stiles about his drawings. He’d never told anyone about them before - not even Laura. But telling Stiles had been easy.
‘It reminds me of line art’ Stiles had said when Derek had sent him a photo of the doodle he had been working on. “I love it’.
A warmth flutters through Derek’s veins.
//
It all goes sideways on the day Laura goes on Derek’s phone to check the time.
She’d raised one eyebrow at him looking amused.
“I thought you didn’t listen to music?” She said, a teasing note to her voice.
“I don’t.” Derek shrugged.
“A huh. So why do you have a picture of Stiles Stilinski as your wallpaper?” She asks.
It’s so startling to hear Stiles name coming out of Laura’s mouth that Derek’s brain refuses to function properly. “How do you know Stiles?” He asks weakly.
Laura laughs. “He’s not exactly a niche celebrity Der. He was a really famous YouTuber before he started selling albums.”
Derek doesn’t know what to say to that. He blinks as his world slowly unravels before him.
No.
She had to be wrong, because Derek couldn’t be in love with a celebrity. Stiles couldn’t be…
“Hey are you okay? You look really sick?”
“He’s famous?” His throat is dry.
“Yes? Are you okay? What’s wrong? You’ve got to speak to me Der. Use your words.”
Derek just shakes his head because he can’t.
“It’s him.” He manages to get out.
“What are you talking about?”
“Laura. It’s him.”
It takes a moment to click but Derek knows when it does because a look of thunderous wrath takes over Laura’s face.
“I’ll kill him.” She seethes, shaking with anger. “What kind of fucking punk thinks that this is a good prank to play?”
“What?”
“No one is getting away with catfishing you, Der. I’m going to hunt this fucker down, and then I’ll rip him so many new ones that he going to look like SpongeBob when I’m done with him.”
And god, Derek hadn’t even considered the thought that Stiles might not even be Stiles. The thought of Stiles being a liar…
The gape in his heart grows a little bit bigger.
And it all falls apart.
//
It takes hours before Derek can convince himself to confront Stiles.
11:08 PM Bad Poet
<you’re stiles stilinki
>fuck
(And yeah, it was really him).
>how did you find out?
<Laura
>I was going to tell you
<Were you?
>Yes
>I’ve wanted to for ages
>It just never felt like the right time to bring it up
<I wish you had decided on the right time was sooner
>Me too
>I’m sorry
>Please don’t hate me
Derek did not think it was possible for him to hate any part of Stiles.
<I don’t
>Thank fuck
>seriously
>can I call you?
<sure
Derek closed his eyes after sending the text and waited for Stiles to ring. A heartbeat later his ringtone sounded off.
“Hey.”
“You believe me right?” And Stiles sounds more frantic than Derek had ever heard him before.
“I believe you, Stiles.”
“Are you sure, because I can prove it if you want? I can do a video call? Or I can tweet literally anythi-”
“Stiles.”
“Yeah?”
“You don’t have to prove anything to me.”
Stiles lets out a small whine, that reaches through the phone line and yanks at Derek’s already tattered heart, unraveling him just a little more.
“Meet me.” Stiles said, taking Derek by surprise.
“What?”
“Please. I meant to throw a please in there, I’m just really fucking nervous right now. Meet me please. In real life. I uh- I was going to ask when I finally told you about the whole being a celebrity thing. It’s still weird to say that out loud. That’s part of why it was so hard to tell you. But the point was you beat me to the punch with the whole reveal thing, but I still wanted to ask.”
“Stiles…”
“And it’s not that I was trying to use my influence or fame to pressure you into meeting me. I just wanted to be in a space where we were one hundred per cent honest with one another before I asked you. You can still say no. Of course you can, I don’t know why I’m- my point is I hope you don’t say no.”
Derek feels his heart break in two.
“Stiles…I can’t.”
“Oh.”
He hadn’t fully realised just how many worlds apart the two of them were when he had fallen in love with Stiles. It felt even more impossible than it had before.
“I’m sorry.” The words leave him feeling hollow.
“No. Don’t apologise. This is just me getting carried away. It’s okay.”
I love you. The words never leave Derek. They can’t leave him.
There was no way this could work, and he was far too scared of breaking the tentative connection they had with his useless words.
It was better for him to just… fall out of love.
//
6:17AM Laura
<it’s really him
>are you sure
<I’m sure
>what are you going to do?
<nothing
>Derek you’re in love with him
<I’m aware
<it doesn’t matter
<it wouldn’t ever work
>I’m sorry
<don’t be
<I’m going to be fine
>Im coming over with wine
//
That night Derek fills pages and pages of his notebook with drawings of Stiles.
When he gets a message from Stiles at 11PM- for the first time since they started messaging- Derek leaves it unopened.
//
He never ignores a message again after that, and life moves on. Stiles still messages him all the time, but he never asks to call anymore.
Derek misses his voice so much that he goes onto youtube and listens to his music.
He buys all three albums Stiles released and it still doesn’t feel like enough.
//
He fills an entire notebook with doodles of Stiles.
It’s still not enough.
//
1:11 PM Bad Poet
>I wrote you a song
>I know you don’t listen to music
>but it felt weird to not a least send you a link
>bad poetry at 2:00am
The link leads Derek to a youtube video of Stiles holding a ukulele and staring with a soft smile at the camera.
“Hey guys. It’s been a while, huh? But I guess I finally found inspiration. So here we go.”
The song is beautiful, but even more beautiful than that was Stiles.
When the song reached the end Derek doesn’t hesitate to hit replay.
He listens to the song ten times before he realises he’s crying - and he knows that he’s never going to ‘get over’ Stiles because he doesn’t want to.
//
3:00 PM Laura
>have you seen the video?
<he sent me a link
<he wrote a song for me Laura
<I love him so fucking much and he wrote a song for me
>fuck
<what do I do?
>what do you want to do?
<I don’t know
>I think you should look at his twitter
<?
>I wasn’t going to say anything because you said you wanted to get over him
>but I think you need to see it
>@stilesstilinki
//
@stilesstilinski
I want to hug him
@stilesstilinski
Get you a guy that will stay up with you until 4AM talking about literally anything
@stilesstilinski
Why do I alway fall for people so far out of my league? rip me I guess.
@stilesstilinski
He makes me want to write poetry
Derek spends hours scrolling through Stiles’ twitter.
He scrolls far enough back that he gets to the part of his timeline where his twitter is littered with pictures of Lydia, which causes the ache in Derek’s chest to grow. But he can’t stop looking because Stiles looks so happy.
And Derek falls impossibly more in love.
He lets himself acknowledge for the first time that Stiles might love him back.
And everything else?
It’s worth it.
Because Stiles is worth everything to Derek.
//
2:00 AM Bad Poet
<so I looked at your twitter
>fuck.
>how much did you see?
<all of it
>tight
>please excuse me while I go die now
>bye
<don’t leave yet
<I had something I wanted to ask you
>did you want me to delete the tweets?
>I can do that
>I’ll just delete the whole account
>I am my own worst enemy so this won’t be a problem
>actually Jackson Whittemore is my worst enemy
>but I’m a close second
<stiles?
>yup?
<Will you go on a date with me?
>alkdjf
>yes?
>Ofc yes?
>are you being serious?
>because this would be a cruel prank if you’re not serious
<I’m serious
>yes.
>yes. yes. yes. yes. yes. yes.
>holy shit
>theres no fucking universe where I say ‘no’ to that question from you
>im so fucking in love with you
>is it too soon to say that?
>I don’t even care
>I’m speaking my truth
>you obviously don’t have to say it back
>im going to woo you so hard Derek
>you’ll have to love me back eventually
>I’m going to write you poetry
>hell I’ll even read poetry for you
>ill give the whole fucking moon to you
<why would I want the moon?
<im not gru?
>despicable me
>that was a despicable me reference.
>you don’t listen to music, but you watch despicable me?
>you’re such an enigma to me Derek
>god I love you so much
<stiles?
>too much?
<no
<I don’t think I could ever have too much of you
<I love you too stiles
<so much
<I just don’t want you to get your hopes up
<I might not be able to live up to it in real life
>impossible
<seriously stiles
>I am being serious
>I’m already in love with you Der
>you don’t have to do anything more than you’ve already done
>you could wear a potato sack, and spend the whole night not saying anything at all
>and I would still be in love with you
>all you have to do now is show up
<…I can do that
>perfect
//
TWO YEARS LATER
@stilesstilinski
Hey @JacksonWhittemore, remember when you told me I would die alone? Well I just got engaged to the love of my life. So checkmate fucker.
#sterek#eternal sterek#what am i even doing?#i just spent the last two days writing this and banging my head against the wall and nothing else#should i write this into a full fic one day?#i probably wont#hope you guys enjoy#sterek drabble#5k words of them being idiots#i cut so much out how is this still 5k?#stiles stilinki#derek hale#laura is the only other character that makes an appearance#im supposed to be sleeping#but here we are ig#texting#wrong number#celebrity stiles
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8 Artists Who Have Impacted My Creative Development
I just watched the Armistead Maupin documentary on Netflix and it made me think a lot about the artists who have had the biggest impact on me as a queer writer. I decided to list them here below. While the list is admittedly not as diverse as I would’ve hoped – the majority of artists are white gay men – it was important to me to accurately document the reality of how I’ve become the writer I am today, even if I am still evolving towards a more diverse perspective.
1. Amanda Palmer
I’m not going to pretend I’m in the dark about the controversies surrounding Amanda Palmer. A lot of people absolutely despise her, and if someone is looking for cancel-worthy receipts, they will likely find them in abundance. However, I can’t think of any queer woman more influential on my artistic evolution than Amanda. From introducing me to cabaret and burlesque at the tender age of fourteen to helping me learn the art of asking through her amazing Ted Talk and book, she has opened my eyes to countless things I would never have found on my own, such as what a revolutionary queer female sensibility can look like when it exists almost entirely outside of the male gaze.
2. John Logan
I can’t pretend I fully support everything John Logan does. His depiction of people of color in Penny Dreadful was horrendous and don’t even get me started on City of Angels. However, years ago, watching his creation—Vanessa Ives—battle with issues of good and evil as well as her own sexuality as I was coming out changed my world entirely. Reading his interviews about growing up gay during the AIDS crisis also helped me understood why monsters always felt like the best metaphor for my own emotional experience of coming out.
3. Richard Siken
Whenever I feel like I’ve lost my voice, or I’m burnt out on reading, my first step is always to reread Crush. No poetry collection or other work of literature has ever touched me in such a profound way. Siken always reminds me of the pure and simple power of the right phrase to reach out from the page and squeeze your heart until it feels like bursting.
4. Olly Alexander
I still vividly remember the first time I saw Olly Alexander’s guest performance as Fenton on Penny Dreadful. I was fascinated by his physicality. His depiction of horror was so queer, so embodied, so theatrical, I would replay the clips just to try to get a better sense of how he was accomplishing all that he was in his scenes. As I followed his career into music and coming out to become a gay icon, I only grew to love him more, and continue to think of him as one of my greatest queer inspirations today.
5. Bill Skarsgard
It seems strange to include Skarsgard in a list of mostly queer icons, but when I think of my creative evolution, I think of it in two different eras—the stories I wrote before I saw Bill Skarsgard act, and the ones I wrote after. He so entirely embodies the idea of a switch – someone who appears dominant one moment, and heartbreakingly submissive the next. It set my imagination on fire that someone could confound heteronormative roles like that. Even if Skarsgard himself is not queer, his depiction of the canonically bi Roman Godfrey was a life changer for me. On a more superficial level, I am also completely fascinated by his appearance, which seems to teeter between traditional good looks and a sinister ‘other’ in a way that still gives me shivers.
6. Chuck Palahniuk
The strange thing about this one is that I have not read one of his novels in ages, and they’re not ones I frequently think of as my favorites. But when it comes to sheer artistic influence, I can’t think of anyone who gave me greater permission to break the rules and say the unthinkable. Stephen King once said that if you want to be a great writer, your days in polite society are numbered. I think Palahniuk’s work is a perfect example of this. Whenever I’m afraid something I’m writing is too controversial, I just remember “Guts,” and suddenly it’s easy to keep going.
7. Ryan Murphy
I hate myself for even admitting this, but American Horror Story has had a huge impact on my writing. At least two of my novels were majorly inspired by his work, and my favorite academic essay I’ve probably ever written was also heavily influenced by his narratives. His sensibility for queerness and horror is in many ways unparalleled, and gives me the courage to explore the relation between queerness and horror that I have always felt compelled to examine in my work.
8. Joanna Russ
After reading “How to Suppress Women’s Writing” everything I’d ever believed about art suddenly seemed up for debate. How do you define a good story? A compelling character? A worthy critic? I’d spent years studying the academically approved, canonical answers to these questions. And then Joanna’s work asked me to reconsider and try to find answers to these questions that felt authentic to me as a human being, and not just as a member of a culture dominated by straight white male gatekeepers. While I haven’t yet figured out all the answers on my own about what defines great literature to me, her work helped me start a lifelong inquiry into the subject, which now forms the base of my current practice.
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La Vie en Rose (Bede and young!Opal time travel fic)
La Vie en Rose (Life in Pink)
Rating: T (for character deaths and language)
Chapter 4/10 - Love Story (length: ~4k words)
Summary: Bede doesn’t get why that loony old bat Opal wants him to be the next Fairy-type Gym Leader. To help him understand, Opal has Celebi take Bede back to the time of her youth.
(For other chapters, look up the tag “pokemon la vie en rose” or go to my profile)
The doctor at the clinic identified fatigue and dehydration as the culprit of Roger’s condition. The man had to lie in bed and receive IV treatment.
The doctor turned to Opal, who had been watching with quiet concern from the threshold of the treatment room. “Should be right as rain in a few days,” he said, “given enough rest and fluids, anyway.”
Bede could tell that she had a handful of questions at the tip of her tongue. Of course she would. He would too, if he ran into a strange, apparently homeless man in the woods.
Finally she told the doctor, “I’ll go see how his Pokemon are doing.”
Bede followed her to Ballonlea’s Pokemon Center across the street, where the nurse had been treating Roger’s Mightyena and Linoone. Their coats were no longer dirty and untidy, but clean and smooth. They perked their ears and wagged their tails when they saw Opal stride up to them.
“Don’t worry, you two, your Trainer’s doing fine at the clinic,” she assured them. “He still needs to be in bed, though. I’m here to pick you up and take you to him, if you’ll let me.”
The two Pokemon exchanged a glance, and Mightyena hopped down from the examination counter to stand at her side. She extended her arms, inviting Linoone to be held. It jumped into her embrace, then surprised her as it scrabbled at the fabric of her dress shirt to curl around her neck and shoulders.
She chuckled. “You prefer that, then?”
Linoone replied with an affirmative grunt.
“Poke balls really weren’t around back then, huh?” Bede asked Celebi. “I don’t think twice about having them. They sure are convenient.”
The two Pokemon accompanied Opal dutifully and quietly until she returned to the clinic. Roger sat up in his bed as soon as he heard Mightyena and Linoone calling for him. The doctor rushed into the room to click his tongue at the Pokemon.
“No jumping on the bed, now,” he told them. “And keep it down. You’ll disturb the other patients.”
Mightyena and Linoone’s excitement couldn’t be curbed until Roger had to repeat the doctor’s orders gently, with a smile behind his unkempt facial hair. Bede noticed that Opal tried to hide her own smile. It was clear to him and her that the two Pokemon found a kind and good friend in Roger.
“You’ll have to stay in the clinic overnight,” the doctor said to Roger. “Then you can be discharged if you’re stable the next day. After that, you’re out of my hands, I’m afraid.”
Roger scratched the back of his head. “It’s already been obvious to this young lady here, but I’m embarrassed to say that I have no place to stay.”
“There’s plenty of space at the theatre,” Opal said. “We can clear out a room for you.”
Roger’s eyes widened. “The Ballonlea Theatre? Oh no, I couldn’t possibly—“
“That’s the next best place. The inn’s under construction.” A mischievous light glinted in Opal’s blue eyes. “Between the theatre and sharing a house with me, an unmarried woman, the rules of society dictate that the first option is a bit less strange and a bit more acceptable.”
That made Roger laugh. “You have a point there. I appreciate your kindness, Miss—um...”
“Opal. My name’s Opal. How do you do?” She reached out to shake his hand, paying no heed to his embarrassment and reluctance to extend his own hand. Perhaps he thought she would be disgusted by his shabbiness. Her initiative seemed to surprise and delight him as his face lit up.
Bede thought he might’ve seen a spark of something as their hands linked. Maybe because he knew years later what would happen between the two.
The next day, after Roger’s condition improved and he was well enough to leave the clinic, Opal had the Ballonlea Theatre’s makeup department clean him up. She passed the time by training her Pokemon in the empty stadium. Well, empty when Bede and Celebi didn’t count.
It was like watching a rehearsal for dancers and actors, which didn’t surprise Bede at all. Weezing, Mawile, Togekiss, and Alcremie practiced their moves with finesse and grace. In between her orders, Opal called out encouragement and praise for their top form.
“Ms. Opal sure likes to put on a good show for everything,” Bede said to Celebi, who chirped in agreement.
He remembered one of the many pieces of unsolicited advice she had given him: “My boy, even in defeat, it is the duty of us Gym Leaders to give the audience a spectacle worth watching.”
Opal lived by that for a very long time. She never lost her flair for the dramatic. Small wonder that even to the present day, she had scores of fans when she otherwise might’ve been pushed aside and overshadowed by younger stars like Nessa and Raihan. Watching the early days of Opal’s passion not only for Pokemon battling, but for making it an art, put a smile on Bede’s face.
The training only stopped when a Gym Trainer showed up at the stadium entrance. “Miss Opal, we’re done,” she called. Then she winked and said, “Mr. Roger’s ready for you.”
Bede saw with amusement that Opal didn’t acknowledge the Gym Trainer’s suggestive tone as she gathered her Pokemon to her side and strode back into the theatre.
Roger emerged a transformed man. A dark, closely fit suit accentuated his tall, slender build. His beard was neatly trimmed. His hair was combed back and closely cropped. All in all, much closer to the dashing gentleman Bede recognized in the old photos.
Opal’s gaze briskly swept him head to toe. Bede noticed that her cheeks turned a bit red at the sight of Roger. A spark of something definitely went off there.
“How do you like your new look?” She asked.
“Very much, thank you, ma’am.” He shook his head and turned up his palms. ”How can I ever repay you?”
Opal held up a hand. “No need for that. My Gym Trainers and I don’t mind accommodating you. Isn’t that right, ladies?”
“Certainly,” one of them said before they all dissolved into light giggles behind their hands.
Opal silenced them with a pointed look under a raised eyebrow, then turned her attention back to Roger. “Besides, frankly you don’t look like you’re in any shape to repay us.”
Though she kept her tone gentle without judgment, Roger sighed and averted his gaze out of shame. “It’s true. I’ve been barely scraping by. My Pokemon and I have roamed far and wide, living day by day off of whatever battle money we can get.” He cracked a sheepish smirk. “And I’m not a very good battler.”
“Well, as you may or may not be aware, Ballonlea Theatre also functions as a Gym,” Opal replied. “We are fully staffed, so I have no need for more Trainers to keep our Gym challenge running. We do, however, need someone to fill in for a role in a play we are trying to put together.” She eyed Roger with interest. “You might just be the one we need.”
Roger tugged at his new tie. “You flatter me, Miss.”
“I say ‘might’ because you’ll have to audition first. I have no doubt that you’ll pass with flying colors, though.” Opal walked over to a table and pulled out a few papers to hand to Roger. “Here’s the casting call and script. We’re supposed to end the call today, but I’ll make an exception for you. Will you be up for auditioning tomorrow afternoon?”
“Yes, Miss Opal, I can.”
“Very good. I heard you singing when you were on the verge of collapse. I look forward to hearing you sing at your best.”
Bede didn’t hear any more of the conversation as Celebi took his hands. The flash of light coming from Celebi was so short that Bede didn’t have time to shut his eyes. Must have been a tiny skip in time.
They jumped to the next day. Roger’s performance during his audition had Opal floored. She was so impressed that she actually went up on stage to sing along with him—something she had never done with the other candidates.
She treated him to dinner later at the Dancing Impidimp, Ballonlea’s premier cafe not too far from the Gym. Bede sat down at a table for two next to them, just in time for him to catch Opal exclaiming in disbelief, “You mean to tell me that you were never classically trained?”
She had almost dropped her cup of tea in the process.
“It’s true,” Roger said modestly. “I never went to school for theatre and singing. Couldn’t afford it.”
“Well, you must have learned somehow.” She sounded more curious and astonished than accusatory.
“When I was young, before I turned ten to become a Trainer, a traveling troupe would visit my home town once in a while to perform. I was enraptured. I committed the notes and steps of all the songs to memory. I wanted to dance and sing just like them. Unfortunately, when I became old enough to join that troupe, they disbanded. My family was too poor to send me to a proper school, so I tried my hand at making money as a Pokemon Trainer, but that didn’t work out so well, either.”
Opal inclined her head at him. “Where did you grow up? I gather from your lack of a Galarian accent that you’re not from around here, I know that much.”
“I’m from Hoenn, ma’am.”
She raised her eyebrows for a moment. “You’ve come a long way, Mr. Roger.”
“I’m from Littleroot Town, to be exact. Maybe you’ve heard of it? I won’t be surprised at all if you haven’t. It’s a sleepy little town, a blip on the map.”
“I can’t say that I’ve heard of it,” she admitted.
“Me neither,” Bede said, knowing that only Celebi would hear him. He had never set foot outside of Galar. It made sense that Roger came from Hoenn. Mightyenas were not local to the Galar region.
“I’m sorry to hear that you’ve had a rough upbringing,” Opal went on after a sip of her tea. “It’s a shame that your talents weren’t recognized. You have an amazing voice. You have the part, for sure. I’ll pay you generously for your contribution to the play.”
Roger raised his hands as if he was trying to stop her. “Miss Opal, you’ve already done so much for me. You gave me a place to stay, let me keep new clothes, and gave me work to do. Any more and you’ll make me very guilty.”
“Oh, don’t be guilty about it. I have a lot of money to spare. Trust me.” Then she raised a hand to her chest. “Oh, dear. That must’ve come off as quite snobby.” She cleared her throat. “What I mean to say is that you deserve reward for your talent, and that I have no reservations about supporting you wholeheartedly. At least, until the play is done and you can get back on your feet.”
Roger beamed at her. “Thank you. I think I’m going to enjoy my time here.”
Celebi touched Bede’s hands once more and they jumped forward in time. He ended up back in the theatre, facing the stage, among a packed audience that sent up a rousing applause for the actors assembled for the final bow. Opal and Roger, decked out in stunning, classy costumes, were among those who bowed with broad grins and a flourish.
Celebi tugged at Bede’s sleeve, beckoning him to follow Opal and her Gym Trainers to the dressing room.
Bede frowned. “I don’t know, Celebi, that’s the room for women—“
“Bi!” The time-traveling Pokemon gave him a playful shove from behind. He had no choice but to duck into the door before the last woman inside shut it behind her.
“Stunning duet, as always, Miss Opal,” one of the Trainers remarked.
“You and Roger make such a great team,” another Trainer said.
“And a great couple, one day,” said yet another Trainer with a giggle.
Opal rolled her eyes as she scrubbed off makeup before the mirror. “Ladies, please. Don’t get all your skirts in a ruffle. The man’s twelve years older than me. He would be more interested in a woman his age.”
“Oh, I don’t think so,” said the Gym Trainer with a gleam in her eye. “Have you seen the way he can barely take his eyes off of you when we rehearse and perform? He’s absolutely smitten by you.”
“Who can blame the poor man? You are a prime specimen of charm and beauty, Miss Opal.”
Opal snatched up a fan from the box of props sitting nearby and swatted at the teasing Gym Trainers. “Enough of this. He and I are just playing our parts. Nothing to it.”
“Oh, it’s much more than that, Miss Opal. You just don’t see it yet.”
The young Ballonlea Gym Leader huffed in exasperation. “I’ll never change out of costume in peace with you ladies around.” With a scowl and reddened cheeks, she put attitude into unbuttoning her dress while the women continued to laugh and tease her.
Celebi spared Bede from looking anymore as it took his hands.
Bede ended up back at the Dancing Impidimp, where Opal and Roger sat down for lunch.
“You would like the usual, I presume?” The waiter asked them.
“Yes, please,” Opal replied, and the waiter took their orders with a knowing smile.
“They must come here a lot,” Bede remarked to Celebi.
On the table between the two were a stack of papers bound by clips, so the breeze wouldn’t blow them away. Bede wondered what those were when Opal said, “Now I know why you insisted that you didn’t want your backpack thrown away with all your old clothes. All these plays you wrote...they’re brilliant. I can’t believe that no one would take them.”
“There’s no market for plays in Hoenn,” Roger replied. “Pokemon Contests are all the rage there. I tried taking them to Unova, but Pokestar Studios make films and have no interest in plays. So I made my way here, because I got word that the Ballonlea Theatre takes a chance on original plays.”
“You heard correctly. We’ve always had a reputation for being avant-garde. Yes, we usually run the classic and established plays, but when we find a story that’s good enough, we take that to the stage as well. And everything you have here is more than good enough, Roger. You are a born storyteller. Is there anything you can’t do?”
Roger laughed. “Well, I can barely put up a good fight in a Pokemon battle. Don’t believe me? Ask Mightyena and Obstagoon, the poor chaps. I’m just not cut out for thinking on my feet and following my intuition. I lost to enough Trainers half my age that it’s quite embarrassing. And I lost count of the number of times I was tempted to burn these scripts, just for a warmer fire at night.”
“I’m glad you didn’t throw them into the fire. I would love to have the theatre perform these plays you’ve written. We’ve run dry on originality these days. We could use a breath of fresh air.”
Roger raised an eyebrow. “Even if the ending’s tragic and everyone dies?”
“Especially that,” Opal replied. “I love the power and poignancy of sad stories. I love wringing a few tears out of the audience.”
“You are quite the sadist,” he joked.
“Says the one who writes those kind of stories.”
“Touche.”
Bede noticed the change in atmosphere since the two had shared a meal at the Dancing Impidimp for the first time. All throughout their banter, they leaned their heads closer, the space between them smaller. They had grown comfortable enough around each other to laugh freely and easily. Neither of them needed to reach over much to brush hands. It was only a matter of time before the two took their relationship further. But how much time?
Celebi answered that by clasping Bede’s hands. This time Celebi took him through brief snapshots, compounded into a compilation of increasingly intimate moments between Opal and Roger.
He watched the two spend long hours in the theatre, collaborating to bring a creative vision from paper to stage. The table Opal had once occupied alone to assess auditions was now shared with Roger as they bent over stacks of scripts to discuss. They would share a pack of cigarettes during these sessions. Many animated conversations were held, and sometimes they escalated to heated proportions when the two disagreed.
To Bede’s dismay, Celebi brought time traveling to a halt to focus on their most heated argument.
Roger frowned across the table at Opal. “I don’t want to make that kind of change to the script.”
She tapped the end of her cigarette into the ashtray. “It won’t look good on stage. Please, Roger, you need to reconsider.”
“You’re asking me to butcher a character beyond recognition.”
She loudly expelled a huff of frustration and smoke from her mouth. “It’s not butchering. You call rewriting a few lines of dialogue butchering?”
“Yes, because those few lines are the essential pivot to the plot!”
Mightyena was curled up in a napping position close to the table, and at Roger’s raised voice, it raised its head and growled at Opal.
She briefly pressed fingers to her temple. “I don’t know any other way to say this without telling it to you straight: the way you portray this character is sexist. It’s painfully clear to me because I am a woman and you’re not.”
That statement from her stamped disbelief all over Roger’s face. “I’m not trying to be—“
“I know you’re not, but being unintentionally sexist is still sexist.” Opal folded her arms across her chest. “You’re not helping your case by challenging me here.”
“I still can’t see where you’re coming from. I tried. I really did. I think you’re looking too much into it.”
“What more can I do to make you see things my way?”
“Your way? These are my stories.” Roger stood up to glare down at Opal. “If there’s something that I don’t want to change, you’d better respect that.”
“And this is my stage.“ She rose from her seat to get nose-to-nose with him. “Your stories aren’t going anywhere without my say so. Your stories aren’t meant to sit on the shelves. They’re meant to be acted out on stage.” Her eyes narrowed to cold blue slits. “I’ve had years of training and experience on the place your stories are meant to be. So you’d better respect that.”
“We’re pulling out the education and fancy degree cards now? When you know that I don’t have one?” Roger’s voice was sharp with scorn. “I didn’t expect you to stoop that low, Opal, but I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. Because you’re the most arrogant, stuck-up, controlling woman I’ve had the displeasure of knowing.”
Opal flinched back as if he had struck her with his hand. Wide-eyed anger rendered her speechless for a moment, then hurt seeped into her face as her brow furrowed and her lower lip quivered. She crushed the cigarette in her hand and let it fall into the ashtray. What she said next came out tight and clipped, but not to Roger. “Weezing, use Fairy Wind.”
She turned on her heel and stormed away from Roger just as her Pokemon floating nearby unleashed the attack on him. He cried out and threw up his hands, sneezing and coughing while Opal fled the theatre.
Bede too was taken by surprise. He squeezed his eyes shut despite not being affected by the sparkling puff like Roger. He blinked his eyes open in time to catch Celebi flying after Opal. He took off after it.
He heard Roger mutter to himself, “Roger, you idiot.” Then he called, “Opal, come back!”
In a time before Poke balls, Pokemon like Rapidash were kept in a stable. The theatre had a stable nearby. Bede ran outside to see Opal free one of the Rapidash from its stall in the stable. Tears ran unchecked down her face. Once she jumped on the Rapidash, she spurred it to a gallop. The Pokemon, startled and confused by her abruptness, reared back and whinnied before following her command. Bede jumped out of the way as the Rapidash hurtled past him.
“Great. How am I supposed to follow her now?” He asked Celebi. He was a fast runner, but there was no way he could catch up with a Rapidash.
But Celebi hovered in place, watching Opal and Rapidash take off in the direction of Glimwood Tangle. Not too far from Bede, Roger had burst out from behind the Gym doors, still coughing and blinking in confusion at the dwindling Opal.
“Opal, please, come back,” he cried.
But she disappeared with the Rapidash into the woods. A few seconds later, Bede heard a terrible scream. He and Roger broke into a run in response. When they reached the edge of Glimwood Tangle, Opal was sprawled on her back, her face and voice twisted in agony. The Rapidash she had been riding didn’t run off, but remained nearby, stamping its hooves in mixed agitation and guilt. Clearly Opal had fallen off the Rapidash.
Bede stood where he was, frozen in horror, while Roger ran up to Opal with arms outstretched, ready to pick her up.
“No, don’t,” she gasped. “I think I broke my back.” She crushed grass into her fists, and all she could get out next was a ragged, drawn out scream of pain.
Roger had to run back into town to get help, and Opal had to be moved onto a stretcher because she couldn’t even sit up. She spent the rest of that day bound to a bed at the Stow-On-Side Hospital. The doctors there found that she had fractured a few bones along her spine, and had torn several muscles of her lower back.
That explains her bad back, Bede thought. He didn’t think she had gotten it this young, though, in her early twenties. He had always thought it was just from her being so old.
Roger stayed close to Opal’s side throughout the medical evaluation and diagnosis. So did Bede and Celebi.
Opal had a tight grip on Roger’s hand through her painful ordeal, before the painkillers kicked in, and he let her hold his hand.
“Opal, I’m so, so sorry,” he murmured. “This is all my fault.”
“No, I’m the one who shouldn’t have jumped on a bloody Rapidash, of all Pokemon, while I was upset and not thinking straight.” She cracked a smirk. “Not a good idea, Roger. I don’t recommend it.”
He didn’t laugh to her weak attempt at humor. “I hurt you. That’s what led to all of this. I’ve thought about your input on the script since coming to the hospital, and you were right. I should’ve listened to you. I shouldn’t have been so harsh.”
“No. You were right to call me out. I had been arrogant, and...” She trailed off and blinked several times, apparently a bit loopy and scatterbrained from all the medications. “What else did you call me?”
“Stuck-up and controlling,” Roger said in a small voice.
“Ah, that’s right. I had to get off my high horse, so I did. Literally.” Opal laughed at her own joke, then looked like she regretted laughing as she winced.
Roger squeezed her hand. “I don’t know where I would be without you, Opal. I have a place to stay, decent clothes to wear, enough food to eat, a job that I enjoy, all thanks to you.”
She smiled up at him. “Well, I don’t do that for just anybody, you know. You have so much talent that I would be a fool to ignore. I love your vision and your voice, and...” She blushed. “I love you.”
Roger drew away in shock, but didn’t let go of her hand, and his own face reddened. “I...I love you, too.”
Coming from sixty years down the line, this came as no surprise to Bede. Still, suddenly he felt that he was intruding on a private moment, and that he ought to wait outside or something.
Opal drew in a sharp breath. “You...you really love me?”
“From the moment I laid my eyes on you, when you stumbled into me in the woods. Of course I didn’t admit it back then, but you were the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. I thought I was hallucinating.”
Roger’s confession made Opal blush even harder. “I fell in love with your voice first,” she said. “You completely drew me in. I can’t remember the last time I’ve ever felt that...that enchanted.” She furrowed her brow. “Perhaps the last time was when I discovered my love for Fairy type Pokemon, when I was a little girl given a Togepi egg.” Then she averted her gaze from Roger, to fix it at the end of her white, clean hospital bed. “I was born into a wealthy and powerful family in Wynwall. I didn’t like growing up there. I wanted to escape. I wanted to prove to the world that I wasn’t a girl who only knew money and things handed to her on a silver platter. So I left for Ballonlea Town. Worked hard under my mother’s tutelage. I tried to leave my roots behind. Apparently I didn’t.” She shook her head against the pillow and sighed. “I am the youngest and only female Gym Leader in Galar, Roger.” Her eyes grew wet with tears. “I suppose, in my efforts to compensate, to prove myself to all the older men, I could never let go of being the stuck-up rich girl I was meant to be.”
Roger reached out to gently brush away the tears on her cheeks with his thumb. “I doubt that you would have given me a second glance if you really are that stuck-up. You can be a little haughty, to be honest, and comfortable with being in charge, but that’s because you run a Gym and a theatre. You have all my admiration and respect for that.” He lifted her hand to kiss the back of it. “You’re not just beautiful, but strong, passionate, and you care so much about Pokemon and theatre. I love you for all of that.”
He leaned over to plant a soft, tender kiss on her lips.
Bede let out a small groan and covered his eyes. Celebi uttered something close to a tinkering laugh and touched both of his hands.
Bede opened his eyes and lowered his hands to find himself back at the Ballonlea Theatre. The actors had finished performing a play and split up after the final bow. All except for Roger, who stood where he was at the center of the stage, and Opal, whose hand was taken by Roger before she could walk away. Along with everyone else in the audience, Bede gasped as Roger lowered himself on one knee and presented Opal with a ring.
“This is not an act,” Roger declared, not just to the audience, but to her. “This is for life. Opal, will you marry me?”
Bede knew that she would say yes. What he didn’t know until now was how that moment came about so publicly, and of course, theatrically. He found himself grinning widely and clapping with the audience as Opal threw herself into Roger’s arms and buried tears of joy into his costume.
Celebi interrupted his clapping by taking his hands. The time-traveling Pokemon never made him leave the theatre, but still transported him to a time when that theatre turned into a site for a wedding.
Amid the gathering of colorful flowers and Fairy type Pokemon, and standing with rows of witnesses, Bede looked up to see Opal and Roger, the bride and the groom, reciting their vows. Their Pokemon stood beside them—Mightyena and Obstagoon next to Roger, and Mawile, Togekiss, Weezing, and Alcremie next to Opal. Looking at her now took Bede’s breath away. Her pixie-like dark hair, coupled with the white, flowing dress and a sparkling lacy veil, made for a stunning, radiant sight. If he hadn’t known any better, he might’ve thought she was a princess. He had seen the old photos, but that didn’t hold a candle to seeing it for himself.
His voice was soft with awe and wonder. “Wow, Celebi...Ms. Opal is so beautiful.”
Opal and Roger sealed the ceremony with a long, deep kiss, becoming husband and wife. This time, Bede didn’t cover his eyes.
Notes: Sometimes I think I’m pushing the envelope with the 12-year age gap between Opal and Roger, but then I think of how the real Maria and Captain von Trapp, the couple who inspired The Sound of Music, were 25 years apart, and I don’t feel as bad.
Speaking of The Sound of Music, musical inspiration for this chapter is: Laendler!
I imagine Roger to look like Gregory Peck, the actor best known for playing Atticus Finch in the film adaptation of To Kill A Mockingbird. He was in Roman Holiday too, another favorite film of mine. I just love old timey things, if you can’t already tell.
#pokemon sword and shield#pokemon swsh#swsh bede#swsh opal#pokemon bede#pokemon opal#pokemon fanfiction#pokemon fic#pokemon la vie en rose
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Flower ask: also all of them. you get to suffer with me >:3€
oh darlin’ we’re in it now huh
Alisons: Sexuality?
homogay
Amaranth: Pronouns/Gender?
she/they | all gender will be shot on sight
Amaryllis: Birthday?
sept 23rd
Anemone: Favorite flower?
monkshood
Angelonia: Favorite t.v. show?
stranger things or ghost adventures
Arum-Lily: What’s the farthest you’d go for a stranger?
like? distance? a couple miles probably
Aster: What’s one of your favorite quotes?
“We are such stuff as dreams are made on, and our little lifeIs rounded with a sleep.” William Shakespeare, The Tempest
Aubrieta: Favorite drink?
wild cherry capri sun
Baby’s Breath: Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
ima change that to ‘kiss the last person u thought abt kissing’ bc YES
Balsam Fir: Have you ever been in love?
*jenna marbles voice* hell yeah!!
Baneberries: Favorite song?
waiting for the end - linkin park
Basket of Gold: Describe your family.
chaos
Beebalm: Do you have a best friend? Who is it?
i have too many to list !!! brandi, kasey, you, liz, ivy, nick , just to name a few!!
Begonia: Favorite color?
blue uwu
Bellflower: Favorite animal?
foxes !! and opossums
Bergenia: Are you a morning or night person?
night time babey
Black-Eyed Susan: If you could be any animal for a day, what would it be?
either a fox or an opossum or a raven, i think
Bloodroots: When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?
i wanted to be a vet !!!
Bluemink: What are your thoughts on children?
theyre ok as long as theyre not screaming and/or mine
Blazing Stars: What are you afraid of? Is there a reason why?
i don’t liike vomit bc. nastey (trauma i think) and i don’t like old ppl well. i dunno why? they’re just so old and fragile and helpless and sometimes they’re really mean and idk i think it’s like something to do w death or something LMAO idk. also i just hate the idea of becoming old and having to rely on other people ?? hhh
Borage: Give a random fact about your childhood.
i was bullied a lot
Bugleherb: How would you spend your last day on Earth?
realistically? probably playing dead by daylight with my girlfriend ADFSGRHYUTR
Buttercup: Relationship Status?
happily taken
Camelia: If you could visit anywhere, where would you want to go?
ireland, scotland, alaska, greece
Candytufts: When do you feel most loved?
whenever my friends or family tells me they love me but esp when u text me goodmorning or when we say our goodnights sorry im gay haha
Canna: Do you have any tattoos?
i have. uuuuhh 6
Canterbury Bells: Do you have any piercings?
no!!! i want some tho :(
California Poppy: Height?
i think im like. 5′5 or something? give or take an inch ?
Cardinal Flower: Do you believe in ghosts?
oh absolutely. my house is haunted as we speak
Carnation: What are you currently wearing?
bmth hoodie and pajama pants w foxes all over them. i just woke up lol
Catnip: Have you ever slept with a nightlight?
yeah i always keep one on in the bathroom
Chives: Who was the last person you hugged?
my sister bc she came home from college yesterday
Chrysanthemum: Who’s the last person you kissed?
ask me in like. a little over a month from now ;)
Cock’s Comb: Favorite font?
FONT??? the animal crossing font
Columbine: Are you tired?
oh absolutely
Common Boneset: What are you looking forward to?
thanksgiving, christmas, seeing my gf, magfest
Coneflower: Dream job?
idk if it’s a job but i just wanna own like. a ranch that takes in all sorts of animals and takes care of them
Crane’s-Bill: Introvert or extrovert?
introvert
Crocus: Have you ever been in love?
ooooh yeah
Crown Imperial: What’s the farthest you would go for someone you care about?
i mean. depends on what they want/need. distance wise? i’d travel the known universe for u
Cyclamen: Did you have a favorite stuffed animal as a child? What was it?
he was a plaid teddy bear his name was Stanley!!!! i miss him :( but now i have Little Moon God as my favourite stuffed animal
Daffodil: What’s your zodiac sign?
Libro
Dahlia: Have you done anything worth remembering?
Working in Yellowstone is something I’ll never forget
Daisy: What do you feel is your greatest accomplishment?
well. hmm. i was gonna say flying to yellowstone but maybe driving to north carolina by myself bc driving long distances alone to places i haven’t been before gives me hella anxiety (i’m better now)
Daylily: What would you do if your parents didn’t like your partner(s)?
i don’t pay rent in this house to listen to their opinions lmao.
Dendrobium: Who is the last person that you said “I love you” to?
you, i think, when we said goodnight last night!!! EDIT: you this morning!!
False Goat’s Beard: What is something you are good at?
being bad at dead by daylight
Foxgloves: What’s something you’re bad at?
dead by daylight
Freesia: What are three good things that have happened in the past month?
(little over a month now but uhhh) GOT A UH ......GIRL.....FRIEND ...... GOT TO VISIT GIRLFRIEND ........ and got the windshield finally replaced in my car
Garden Cosmos: How was your day today?
i dont know! so far ive laid in bed now im at my computer answering this. not too bad. my shift is only 4 hours today.
Gardenia: Are you happy with where you’re at in your life?
for the most part, i’m pretty content, yeah
Gladiolus: What is something you hope to do in the next year or two?
MOVE OUT
Glory-of-the-Snow: What are ten things that make you happy/you’re grateful to have in your life?
my friends, my mom, my sisters, my girlfriend, my bastard dog
Heliotropium: What helps you calm down when you feel stressed?
metal
Hellebore: How do you show affection?
what does this mean. physically, i’m very affectionate, i just. don’t show it alot bc anxiety/i overthink. that and i constantly tell ppl i love them and what they mean to me
Hoary Stock: What are you proudest of?
whoever is reading this
Hollyhock: Describe your ideal day.
wake up next 2 a cute girl. take way too long to get up. go climb mountain w cute girl. vibe on mountain w cute girl. go to waffle house 2gether. gome home and vibe. play video games or watch a movies/tv w cute girl.
Hyacinth: What do you like to do in your free time?
i like to make art or play bideo jame
Hydrangea: How long have you known your best friend? How did you meet them?
oh gosh i dunno. the ones i’ve known the longest are kasey and brandi, and i’ve known them both around/over a decade i think. we met in middle/highschool!
Irises: Who can you talk to about (almost) everything?
you, ivy, liz
Laceleaf: How many friends do you have?
so many
Lantanas: What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received?
idk man but i remember when you said u had a crush on me and then i posted a selfie and u were like ‘OH NO SHE’S CUTE” and like ??? idk i think that was definitely the first compliment to ever shock me LMAO
Larkspur: What do you think of yourself?
6.9/10
Lavender: What’s your favorite thing about yourself?
my tattoos
Leather Flower: What’s your least favorite thing about yourself?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kGGViLwHEUk
Lilac: What’s something you liked to do as a child?
i liked to play zombies ate my neighbors on the sega genesis !!!!
Lily: Who was your best friend when you were a kid?
eliza !!!! we lost touch a few years after i moved away :(
Lily of the Incas: What is something you still feel guilty for?
ima be real everything makes me feel guilty
Lily of the Nile: What is something you feel guilty for that you shouldn’t feel guilty about?
aaaaaa the whole abi/moon incident
Lupine: What does your name mean? Why is that your name?
my name is fox. it means i like foxes
Marigold: Where did you grow up? Tell us about it.
northern virginia babey !!!! that place fucking sucks!!! but everyone who lives up there thinks they’re hot shit.
Morning Glory: What was your bedroom like growing up?
i had a bunkbed and i think the walls were pink
Mugworts: What was it like for you as a teenager? Did you enjoy your teenage years?
😬 i’m just gonna say i’m much happier now and i’m coping with life and shit a lot better
Norwegian Angelica: Tell us about your mom.
she’s sweet and funny and i love her so much!! she always does the Most for everyone, sometimes to the point where she isn’t concerned abt herself and i see where i get it from. but yeah my mom is great, my dad doesn’t deserve her
Onions: Tell about your dad.
source of a lot of trauma and why i have so many issues regarding men. i don’t wanna talk about him anymore LOL he doesn’t deserve the attention
Orchid: Tell about your grandparents.
my dad’s mom is becoming senile and i think she’s racist and queerphobic. my mom’s parents disowned her a few years ago so we don’t talk to them anymore
Pansy: What was your most memorable birthday? What made it be so memorable?
i dunno. i don’t try to remember my birthdays. whenever i can go to busch gardens for my birthday i usually have a lot of fun there.
Peony: What was your first job?
if you don’t wanna count working w my mom as a florist, target was my first job back in 2016. i found my name tag the other day , actually
Petunia: If you’re in a relationship, how did you meet your partner(s)? If you’re not in a relationship, how did you meet your crush/how do you hope to meet your future partner(s), if you want any?
WELL, i know you followed me on here first. and then twitter?? but we didn’t really start talking until stranger things 3 came out (thank u stranger things) PHYSICALLY, we didn’t meet until fursonacon (haha. i remember when u texted me that u got to the hotel and i came down to help n i saw u unloading yr car and it was then that my brain was like OH NOOOOOOOO and my heart was like OH YEEEEAAAAAAAH)
Pincushion: How do you deal with pain?
physical, mental, or emotional? i play a video game or listen to loud music
Pink: Where is home?[
somewhere in appalachia i can feel it in my stupid soul
Plantain Lilies: If you could go back in time, what is one thing you would stop/change?
idk man i’m pretty content w where i’m at now so
Prairie Gentian: Who is someone you look up to? Describe them.
chester bennington
Primrose: Describe your ideal life.
i have a waife and we have many great pets and we live in a log cabin in the mountains or in a nice victorian in a small town or something IDK but we’re happy and that’s all that matters
Rhodendron: What is something you used to believe in as a child?
God
Ricinus: Who’s the most important in your life?
my mom, me best friends, my girlfriend
Rose: What’s your favorite sound?
my girlfriend’s laugh because it’s THE cutest shit and then when she giggles??? oh my heart
Rosemallows: What’s your favorite memory?
oct 23rd, 2005, we brought Fat Boy Zack home !!!!
Sage: What’s your least favorite memory?
July 22nd, 2016. i was 2200 miles away
Snapdragon: At this moment, what do you want?
to be holding my girlfriend >:(
St. John’s Wort: Is it easy or difficult for you to express how you feel about things?
hhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Sunflower: What is something you don’t want to imagine life without?
those i hold dear
Sweet Pea: How much sleep did you get last night?
enough, i guess?
Tickseed: What’s your main reason to get up every morning?
my girlfriend
Touch-Me-Not: How do you feel about your current job?
it’s fucking BORING and TOO EASY and they don’t pay me ENOUGH but i can get away with so much shit there so ima still go, ima still go
Transvaal Daisy: What’s your favorite item of clothing?
all of the flannels currently in my possession
Tropical White Morning Glory: Describe your aesthetic.
mountains, woods, forests, cabins, autumn, cryptic, occult, victorian, edwardian
Tulip: What would be the best present to get you?
if someone gets me a gift i’m legally required to execute them
Vervain: What’s stressing you out most right now?
this 40hr workweek i got coming up
Wisteria: How many books have you read in the past few months? What were they called?
i have not read in So Long
Wolf’s Bane: Where do you want to be in life this time next year?
Moved out away from here lol, we’ll see
Yarrow: Do you know what vore is?
:/
Zinnia: Give a random fact about yourself.
i’m a furry
that was SO LONG im sorry i also put you through that but THANK YOU ENJOY READING ILU
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A Bunch of Good Things from 2019
*I don’t do things consistently, so there’s chunks of time I just forgot to write. So the blank spaces are days where I could not recall the exact good things that happened.*
January
1: Started the year off right by hanging out with @nah-young, eating some delicious leftovers from New Year’s Eve and working on a puzzle. Also caught a shiny Delibird in Pokemon Go as the first catch of the year.
2: Had a headache at work, but went home to take care of myself. Dad and I talked for a long time about money and taxes without arguing. I have also discovered a future hobby I want to get into: 3D printing.
3: I cranked out four solid hours of studying. I’m going to ace the Auditing section of the CPA exam. I feel it in my bones (especially when I finally stood up and stretched).
4: My ‘other mom’ (one of my best friend’s mom) took me out for a belated Birthday lunch to our favorite Thai food place, and I enjoyed more mango sticky rice. It’s one of my new favorite desserts.
5: Did some epic New Year cleaning. Caught up on laundry, filed away my 2018 paperwork, and did some 2019 taxes. Finally on top of things!
6: A puzzle day! I connected a big piece of the sky to the side on the Lion King puzzle. I’ve still got a lot to go, but progress is being made.
7: As usual, I both surprised and pleased the teller at the bank when I moved some money from savings into my IRA. They wanted to know if it was for tax year 2018, but I could tell them last year was maxed out and it was for 2019.
8: Got to practice my training and supervising skills with @arrowhearts.
9: Spent the night at Lucy’s (she’s a cat). She’s the sweetest cat though, and was cuddling in my lap for so long! She even held my finger with her paw for like ten minutes. I love her.
10: It’s been forever, but I finally sat down and played some video games. I’m replaying Arkham Asylum again and really just exploring every nook and cranny I can find.
11: Might have started a new Francis story line ... Whoops :)
12: Helped Jane clear an apartment and acquired many new tools and art supplies to use.
13: Snow! It was snowing before bed, but I still woke up at 5 am to about 4 - 5 inches. Activated my dad gene and started shoveling at 5:30 am (sorry neighbors to the house I was dog sitting at). It’s so pretty out!
14: A quiet day, but I did some work for Jane and gamed some more. Can’t wait to start Arkham City when I get 100% on Arkham Asylum!
15: I took my coworker a basket of fun snacks from Lotte for her Birthday. She’s so excited to try them all!
16: Donated blood today and when I went to get dinner on the way home, I got a free salad! The entree was already free and I ordered a side salad. I pulled out my wallet to pay, but the coupon covered it, too!
17: Treated myself to breakfast on the way into preschool (my new volunteer place since the teacher I followed to several elementary schools is now at). Also ate some amazing home cooked food for lunch with @nah-young before going out for ice cream.
18: Did some very early spring cleaning to prep for my next yard sale and straighten up a bit.
19: Beat the storyline and finished gathering all of Riddler’s trophies in Arkham Asylum. I do still need to finish up the additional content for 100% completion.
20: Working with Jane to help clean out an apartment again and got stencils to use for my art (the ones with shapes of different sizes). I had wanted to get me a set, so I really lucked out.
21: Started reading a book for fun. Lol, I forgot that I can still read non-accounting things for fun.
22: Sent out 1099s at work. It’s always a dreaded part of the year, but it’s taken care of!
23: I started uploading my old Franmouche stories to AO3. I forgot that I’d written 185 pages of them. At least if someone else likes my rarepair, they have lots to read. No guarantees on the quality, but there is quantity.
24: Made fun penguin cutouts for the preschool class I volunteer at. Then studied for nine hours on campus. A busy, yet productive day.
25: Finished watching all my lectures for the next portion of the CPA exam! So much auditing knowledge!!!
26: Panic alleviated. My check engine light had been on for a few days. Usually it’s just a gas cap issue so I was worried, but after readjusting the cap again (which usually fixes it) and an oil change, the light went out!
27: Played some Pokemon Go for four hours with @arrowhearts and Lyla. No Kyogre, but at least we each got a Groudon. Plus, the weather was beautiful for this time of year.
28: I found a dollar today while sweeping the parking lots with my dad! I’m gonna be riding this wave for a week. (Fun fact: my dad and I used to go bike riding on Sunday afternoons/evenings in the local parking garages and look for pennies. We’d always get bragging rights when we found a quarter or more. We still get excited and tell each other of the day’s finds when we find a few coins while we’re sweeping).
29: Had a bit of a headache, but managed to get through it so I could finish the workday. Then I get some well deserved rest.
30: Met up with @nah-young for some fries and ice cream!
31: My annual physical went well! Took care of a couple test we’ve been putting off, too, and they weren’t quite as bad as I thought they’d be.
February
1: I had such a productive day in the office, even for a Friday. Special thanks to @arrowhearts for helping me move all (24 years worth) of our files.
2: Started off the day a little rough and feeling low, but I decided to go up to campus, and I’m so glad I did. I was able to help a bunch of people get to their destination. Also hung out with @nah-young and @arrowhearts in a sketchy room.
3: Technically today (starting at 1 am). Had a great talk with @nah-young about a lot of things including our friendship. Successfully avoided the Super Bowl (which I heard sucked, so that was a good use of my time).
4: Had a really good conversation with my dad for almost an hour. We had some fights earlier in the year, but it was nice to be able to connect some.
5: It’ll be silly to look back on, but I thought I lost a reference letter for a scholarship applicant, but realized I could find it on our shared drive. Such a relief!
6: I tried Duck Donuts for the first time today. One of our board members brought me and a coworker a half dozen each.
7: Caught a Miltank in Pokemon Go! I thought I missed my chance, but there was a special running, so I got it.
8: Just heard we got a new boss at work, so it’ll be nice to be full staffed again.
9: Started working on a painting for @arrowhearts. It might be my first completed artwork of the year.
10: A lazy day, but I flipped through a book on home decorating. You know, to plan for my future house.
11: Officially started working for Jane’s business. We’ll see how it goes, but at least it’s an extra couple of hours per week.
12: Finished a dog sitting job, and I’m super thankful to be sleeping in my own bed again.
13: I gave Lucy, the sweetest cat ever, a piggyback ride and it was the cutest thing ever. I was on my knees and forearms trying to get Lucy to boop my nose when she just climbed on my back and sat down. I rose up on my knees and hands and she did the “i’m not so sure but I’m going to stay here” stand and let me crawl across the floor a while before finally jumping off. I love this cat.
14: Took the auditing section of the CPA exam. I feel much better about this one than I have about the other two. We’ll see on the 26th.
15: Such a busy day at the office! It was productive, but just a lot of work.
16: Even though I just too the other exam, I managed to get a lot of studying done.
17: Mamaw and I got to chat and work on the puzzle for a while. It was nice to hang out with her since I haven’t done son in quite a while.
18: We had some really good food at our investment club meeting today. Sheppard’s pie (like meat and mashed potatoes), salad, this great cracker dip (I have no other details other than feels like sharp cheddar finally shredded with a hint of spice in some sort of sauce).
19: Our new executive director started today. I think I made a pretty good first impression!
20: Started playing Arkham City again. We had a snow day and even my office closed, so I made the most of my day.
21: Lol and today I finished the main storyline of Arkham City. Accidentally, because I was doing side quests, but Batman got mad when I tried to go finish some before the last mission.
24: I am obsessed with Excel, but I figured out a formula so that it would total certain categories even if they weren’t in order. Plus I learned how to make a drop down menu (on two versions of Excel). Guess who’s budget looks beautiful!
25: I caught a Latias in Pokemon Go. Not having much luck with the water legendaries. I wonder if they don’t like me because we picked the grass starter.
26: I passed the Auditing section! (and instead of keeping it quiet, I made a point to tell some people). Then @nah-young and I went to dinner to celebrate our successes of the day and just have a nice chat.
27: Good news: I starved off a migraine that was starting on Feb 26. Maybe this new method will help them from getting bad. Just took an Aleve with some hot tea.
28: Went on a Pokemon run, and I found $20 blowing across the yard when I got home! A nice find for the year.
March
1: I’ve been really getting into “Ghost Story” by Peter Straub and had so much time to just sit and read while it rained.
2: I watched “Spiderman: Enter the Spiderverse” today. An epic movie and I highly recommend it! I also have several new costume ideas...
3: Officially started working on my Library Comic Con cosplay. There’s not much to show, but it was nice to start costuming again.
4: Hiked up to the nearby bubble tea. It was good! I got a mango green tea creama. Next time I know I have to mix it up before I start drinking it.
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10: Started replaying Castlevania IV. It’s been a while since I beat it, so hopefully I can still finish it!
11: I have proven myself an Excel deity. Well, at least Jane thinks though. She needed a spreadsheet for something and had some ideas so I whipped it out in five minutes flat with a bunch of formulas she didn’t even know were possible. I’m quite proud of it.
12: Lol, speaking of excel, I was geeking out over my budget with one of our board members. She was showing me how she built her itinerary in excel for her next trip and I got to show off my budget.
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15: It was fake St. Patrick’s day at work, so I got to show off my green Riddler suit. Apart from being mistaken as dressing like a leprechaun a few times, I received a bunch of compliments on it. I’ve gotten a lot of use out of that suit jacket.
16: Tagged along with @nah-young to her grandfather’s birthday party and watched Bohemian Rhapsody. Apart from the timeline inaccuracies, I really enjoyed it! Look at that: two new movies in one month.
17: First big leaf job of the season. I guess the first major landscaping job. Dad helped out, so it made life easier.
18: Investment club meeting went well, and I ended up staying late to chat and help clean up, but it was enjoyable. Also had some great tiramisu from Trader Joe’s.
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21: It was a downpour today, but I also made a 20 minute Costco run. Parking was great, the lines were short, and I managed to balance everything without a cart. Success!
22: Finally got around to doing invoices. It’s such a weight off my chest to take care of them.
23: I had the house to myself, so got ample studying done, played some pokemon, and treated myself to some bubble tea. Got myself a bunch of good pokes from Community day.
24: Another lovely day to sit and hang out with @nah-young. I always enjoy our hour long conversations just sitting in my car in her driveway. I also finished the lectures for the BEC portion of the CPA exam.
25: I found a gift card loaded with $30 today. It had been thrown into the dumpster, so a little gross, but it washed off nicely.
26: Ran up to the local library to turn in my books (look @arrowhearts, I did it the day before they were due and didn’t have to make a midnight run). I wasn’t going to check out more books since I already had some checked out from another library visit (I go to many branches due to my job and often check out a book or two, resulting in cycles of books due at different times), but I did anyway. I started reading Area X, too, and so far, I’m really enjoying it.
27: Our family’s accountants think I’m a bit weird because I was so excited to get my tax papers back even though I owed money. I was just like “cool!” to all the facts and things on my sheets, which is apparently not what they’re used to, but one of the new tax laws works in my favor as small business income is taxed at a lower rate or something.
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30: I love Annihilation in the Area X series! I haven’t plowed through a book that fast in years.
31: I was catching up on my business spreadsheets and it turns out I had the most profitable March since I started my business :)
April
1: No April Fools jokes, which is always a huge plus.
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4: Took the BEC section of the exam and then clocked in a bunch of hours for the Foundation. Jubilee is almost here!!!
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6: The Jubilee is over!!! What a relief! A lot of things went well, and I heard it was a lot of people’s favorite. Not sure what actually happened because I was stationed at check in/out all night, but hopefully the silent auction results are good. Huge shout out to @arrowhearts and @nah-young for getting me through the night!
7:A quiet morning of returning the Jubilee to the Foundation. Plus some other landscaping.
8: I know everyone at work is saying I should take time off, and I didn’t, but I’m actually feeling blessed that I have the physical and mental stamina to keep working on things. Plus, I need to catch up with post Jubilee stuff.
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19: Got to talking with my art dealer for a long while and we exchanged headcannons and ideas.
20: Had a nice Pokemon run with @arrowhearts‘ dog. Plus, enough work to keep me out of trouble X)
21: A very busy Easter. I moved a huge mound of mulch. It was half the size of my car. Hopefully the home owner will like it.
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31: I’ve been feeling behind, but I finally knocked out a really important thing at work today. Got our annual applications in!
May
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3: My gauntlets for my comic con costume look so cool! They’re a little stabby (there’s staples on the inside, although I should be able to tape it down for safety), but overall look cool for a first draft.
4: A long day, but I feel like I was really able to help my friend and her family, which is nice considering how much they do for me.
5: The event that happened wasn’t good, but I’ve been humbled as to how well our house was kept and motivated to try and become more organized.
6: Dad and I were chatting today, and we could even touch on topics in a civil manner. It was quite nice!
7: Just found out I passed the BEC section of the CPA exam! I’m 75% CPA!!! And no cavities were found after my dentist appointment :)
8: Frantically working on my costume, but my head piece looks really good!
9: Mom even chipped in to help. We rigged up a steampunk mask I have (which doesn’t fit on my head right) so that I can actually wear it.
10: I’ve been fasting for Ramadan and I think my body and I are finally on the same page. It was a rough start this year, but I’m looking forward to focusing on being thankful for what I have and working on self discipline.
11: Library Comic Con! My costume is a bit rough, so no final pictures, but I have plans to make it better!
12: It was a busy Sunday. Lots of lawns, but thankfully the weather was cool.
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17: Had a nice meeting with my boss. I keep feeling like I’m not on top of things or she’s disappointed, but that doesn’t seem to be the case. Plus, she said I did great at the finance committee meeting, so that was nice.
18: Although I scared everyone I worked with all day, I was able to donate blood even though I had been fasting.
19: I saw the tiniest inch worm while I was pulling weeds today. It was more like a quarter inch worm and it was just trying so hard to climb up my arm when I found it. I also saw the first lightening bugs of the year. As a bug type Pokemon trainer, I’m quite pleased with all of this (less so with the mosquitoes though, as I got my first bite of the season).
20: I have found a nice way to keep cool at the property Dad and I work at. I’m allowed to douse my head, neck, and hat with the hose, and man does it feel good!
21: I received many compliments at the executive committee meeting for all my hard work on the budget, the Jubilee, and finance committee.
22: Caught up on reconciliations at work (finally). It’s been just a nightmare, but I’m happy they’re done.
23: Another me day. I’ve been taking Thursdays off and got to game for a bit but also accomplish a lot of laundry and studying.
24: Had a good meeting at work to discuss the future of the nonprofit I work at. Plus I finally made a phone call I didn’t want to make.
25: Went to a foam helmet making class with a coworker. I’m super excited to start trying out this style, and I think the sample we made in class can easily be used to make a helmet for Vile. Might have purchased a few things to go with it :)
26: Found a new drink that I love from Kung Fu Tea! Also got to rewatch Coco, which is always good.
27: Part of my afternoon spent working with Jane was changing her screen saver. It was set up for one photo of pictures, but some were so fuzzy, so we set up new pictures and I got to add my fuzzball to the reel.
28: I visited one of Jane’s friends to discuss dog sitting and we had such a nice conversation afterwards.
29: I found a four leave clover today while mowing lawns. It’s been years since I’ve found one, so that was exciting.
30: I plowed through about 6 hours of studying for the FAR portion of the CPA exam. Only two more lectures and then onto multiple choice!
31: Filled out a form at work (finally). Now I just have to hope my boss will sign it and have it notarized.
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14: Wasn’t sure what day to put this on, but @nah-young and I hung out for hours just sitting and chatting on the cats’ back porch.
15: Successfully navigated into DC with the help of @arrowhearts (and had an interesting laugh about her being my son...? Oh well, at least we got to give the people sitting outside a show as we left the building with two rollie office chairs each).
16: Started working on my Halloween costume. I’ve abandoned the idea I originally had and will be switching to a different Mega Man X character (fun fact: it was a costume I originally intended to make before being introduced to Scaramouche back in 2017)
17: It was a scorcher, but had a slurpee for the first time in almost a year. I’m so thankful for the 7-11 within walking distance of where my dad and I work on Mondays.
18: I’ve officially passed the CPA exam! Now onto the next steps...
19: I have been struggling with telling people good news, but I did make an effort to inform some people about me passing the exam.
20: Told some more people about the CPA exam and just trying not to stress. I got celebratory milkshakes for my family after dinner.
21: My coworkers are so sweet. They brought me in a cake and we had a mini celebration.
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26:Found a praying mantis while mowing. She kept standing where I wanted to mow, so I got to pick her up and put her somewhere safe (with lots of snacks for her!)
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29: So glad I went to see Detective Pikachu with @nah-young and @arrowhearts! I really enjoyed it!
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July
1: A new fiscal year! I did manage to get a good bit done on my latch hook.
2: A sudden thunderstorm took me off the weed pulling job early (i.e. a perfect opportunity to read).
3: It was quiet in the office. Too quiet ... yet super productive! I processed so many gifts and letters.
4: I don’t really celebrate, and spent a lot of it working, but played some pokemon in the rain. It was a warm day, so the cool rain felt so refreshing!
5: A jammed packed day with trashrooms, a bank run, and more pokemon quests! I completed another 15 and hatched a new pokemon. Plus I finished another book: Dr. Death.
6: A busy day, but I was able to finish everything so I can take the next day off completely (for once). Again, apologies to @arrowhearts for dragging you out and getting caught in a downpour so I could get some bubble tea!
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10: Unboxed my unicycle! Not sure when I’ll ride, but it’s ready when I am.
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20: Spent a few hours working on cleaning the basement, and I’m finally seeing some of the fruits of my labor.
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24: Officially finished the Vile helmet!
25: Just started a new dog sitting job, and the house is right on top of a pokestop. Guess I’m going to have a full item bag again!
26: Finally got myself a memory stick for my PSP. I’m replaying the Maverick Hunter X game ... because I can!
27: Got three team rocket grunts in one day at the one stop.
28: Plowed through the Vile portion of Maverick Hunter X. Lol, I probably make it harder on myself since I only use my favorites, regardless of if they’re good against the boss.
29: Had a huge crab and shrimp dinner at Jane’s house.
30: Hung out and ate delicious homemade butter chicken with my best friend’s mom (she’s basically like my other mother). We laughed and chatted, showed off our latest projects, probably kept the neighbors up, and just had a good time until like 2 in the morning.
31: Welp, it wasn’t a raid day for armored Mewtwo, but @arrowhearts and I did defeat more Team Rocket Go grunts in the rain.
August
1: Chatted with @nah-young for a few hours and I’ve got a new place to eat on my radar!
2: I kept feeling like I was letting my boss down because I couldn’t answer her questions/didn’t understand, but she insisted I was handling myself well, and found the information she needed later. Plus, she’s very complimentary of my work and appreciates my transparency and work ethic, both of which I work hard on and value.
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September
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15: I had such a good ripstik run. @nah-young and I practiced for a good while yesterday (and she did her first trick, too!). I guess it’s nice to see the fruits of our practice since we’ve been working off and on for about a month.
16: Had the investment club meeting at my house. I didn’t get to cook everything, but I picked the recipe and it turned out well!
17: I finished “Every Tool’s a Hammer” by Adam Savage (from Mythbusters) and I really recommend it. It’s such a great book for anyone who makes or creates. It’s a fun read and chocked full of helpful hints.
18: I decided to start reading the Naruto series. I’m enjoying it so far! Now I just have to wait for the next to volumes to be available from the library.
19: I started replaying Scooby Doo and the Cyber Chase. It’s amusing, although I’m a little rough.
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23: I’d been on the fence about taking a vacation early next year because I want to save up for a down payment, but after talking to my dad, I decided I’d do a little something. I still need to work out the plans (and make sure the people I want to visit are free), but I’m looking forward to it!
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26: There’s a chance I might be going full time at my office job, so dad encouraged me to take the day off from trash rooms. I still got up early, but knocked out a bunch of chores, finished Scooby Doo and the Cyber Chase, finished a drawing, and cleaned in the basement a bit.
27: Lol, I just realized I have three cycles of books checked out again. I started reading The Wicked Years series. I’m trying to set aside time each night so I can read a chapter or two before bed.
28: I made the pattern for my gauntlets! I’m actually trying to do it the right way and making measurements, creating an accurate template, and just generally taking my time.
29: Part 2 of the gauntlets: They’re made! My template worked and I spent a couple of hours slowly forming and shaping them. I still need some practice on the gluing component, but at least they feel sturdy.
30: Started replaying DK 64 again. I really love this game. Besides Gauntlet Legends, it’s probably my favorite N64 game we own.
31: Got rained out at work, but managed to take it easy in the afternoon and just generally keep ahead with laundry.
October
1: Today officially marks the first day of working full time at my office job. They added ten hours a week, so now I’m working 4 days at 10 hours each. It’ll take a little adjusting. I’m happy for the extra hours!
2: I sent out invoices on time for once!
3: It was my fuzzball’s 16th Birthday today! Someone also brought in some really yummy snacks to work that were leftover from a meeting. I also managed to create templates for the leg gauntlets and cut them out of foam. I’m just rolling with the motivation now, and would like to have Vile finished by Halloween (keep reading to find out if it was finished).
4: Really just having a good time playing DK 64. Knocked out Gloomy Galleon, so all that’s left are my favorite levels!
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7: I have leg gauntlets formed. Lol, I guess I should look up the name... All that’s left is the chest plate and cape!
8: I lucked out! My coworker can’t go to a book signing even this weekend and asked me to get her book signed since I’m going. It was the perfect opportunity to get my hands on a copy of “Where the Crawdads Sing” which I wanted to read before this weekend.
9: Making some headway on the costume again! Arm and leg gauntlets have the plating and base coat of plastidip.
10: I finished “Where the Crawdads Sing” within 48 hours of having it my possession. That’s such a huge accomplishment to read something so quickly and eagerly!
11: I was plowing through my to do list at work. I knocked out 11 items. Woo!
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31: I won the most creative costume at work! Well, tied for first, but that’s cool.
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12: My coworker is back! She had been on extended leave for a while, but now she’s back. She bring such a positive and fun attitude to the workplace.
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14: I’m officially 25! I worked a few hours in the rain, but got a lot done (and saw Lucy, my favorite cat I cat sit). Instead of going to a steakhouse for dinner, which I’m not a fan of, we ended up going to somewhere I did enjoy. Overall, it was a nice and quiet celebration.
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17: I finished the Naruto series today! It was a good series, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Going to take a manga break to work on a few novels I have checked out and then decide which series to start.
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19: A busy day again. Knocked out two leaf clients for the year and went to see three bands perform at a local music club. I stayed out way too late, but had a great time hanging with a friend, one of the performers, and the performer’s friend.
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24: Hung out with my brother and grandmother. I crushed them in several games!
25: Went to my coworkers in the afternoon and dueled for the first time in quiet a while. They wiped the floor with me, but I had fun with my deck destruction deck.
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27: Ended up hanging out with Jane for a while and just chatting about everything. We’re seeing eye to eye on a lot of things, so it was nice.
28: Finished my leaf jobs for the year! Time to relax.
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31: Welp, ended up being sick and missing out on the intended New Year plans. I guess I did start the year with a migraine, so here I am ending it with one. After I rested up, I did start playing my favorite video game. Plus, I frantically read “Hey, Kiddo!” before the end of the year
Notable stuff
Highlights:
Passed the CPA exam
Officially hired full time
Books read:
“Ghost Stories”
“Every Tool’s a Hammer”
“Where the Crawdads Sing”
“Wicked”
Naruto series
“Hey, Kiddo!”
Movies watched:
Spiderman: Enter the Spiderverse
Mary Poppins 2
The Princess and the Frog
Pokemon Lucario
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⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚apple of my eye ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆
I II III IV V VI VII VIII IX X
gang member!han jisung, florist!reader, sort of band member!han jisung
masterlist
a/n: hey there! i did my best to incorporate the proper meanings of the flowers, but i apologize if i got anything wrong. this was a bit longer than i intended! i hope you enjoy, and like dance the night away and to protect our district, this will also be a series. if you’re curious, the meaning of the flowers are at the end! ʕ ꈍᴥꈍʔ also i made minho super sassy but i lov him i promise!!
warnings: angst?
You loved your flower shop, it meant everything to you. Granted, it was on the smaller side, but she was your pride and joy. It had been a year since you moved countries, and Korea still surprised you. Even though you were on the quieter side of the city, it could get overwhelming. But not in your flower shop, the world was quiet here. You were admiring the hibiscus’* that you were arranging into a bundle an elderly lady had requested. She was ordered to pick them up about an hour from now, and you’d hope she’d be pleased with the arrangement. Much to your distaste, flower shops weren’t all that popular anymore. The making of flower bundles with meanings was a dying art. But nonetheless, you adored it. The smell and delicate nature of flowers gave you comfort, especially when you had first moved here. Quite enamored in your own thoughts, you almost didn’t notice the bell chiming of a new customer.
“Can I be of any help?” you called out into the store, putting the vase with the finished hibiscus bundle on the counter. Much to your surprised, a boy only a bit older than you walked up to the counter. He held his hands together nervously, his tanned face looking down. “Hey,” you spoke again, “Are these for your grandmother?” He looked up immediately, and nodded. “Yes!” he responded, “How did you know?” You dragged your fingers across the counter to the cashier. “Just a hunch,” you said shyly. He handed you the money and wrapped his hands tightly around the vase. “Thank you.”
“Come again!”
You didn’t think too much of the encounter, mostly because you didn’t want to get your hopes up and expect to see him again. But as you got your shop ready for another new day, opening the blinds and letting the sun come in and shine on your various flowers. As you propped open the door, you noticed someone waiting outside.
The boy from yesterday.
“Ah,” you paused, “Do you need something?” He smiled and his cheeks curved out cutely, as he held out a plate of sweets, covered in saran wrap. “My grandmother wanted me to bring these to you,” he explained, “To thank you for the flowers. She said they were one of the best arrangements she’d ever ordered.” You rubbed your hands nervously. “Thank you,” you grabbed the platter, “Do you want to come in? I could get you something to drink?” He followed you inside, back to the counter as you pulled up a stool for him to sit on.
You returned with some tea when you noticed he was up and touching the arrangements that sat behind your counter. “They’re pretty,” he commented, “But aren’t you a bit young to own a flower shop?” You put the teapot and the cups down, walking over to stand by his side. “I still study,” you explained, “But I moved here as soon as I was of age, and opened up my shop.” You rubbed one of the petals softly. Noticing you were getting carried away, you turned your attention away from the flowers and to the boy standing next to you. You caught his eye from a moment and you both turned to the platter of sweets. “You never told me your name,” he said, “My name is Han Jisung.” You smiled. “It’s ___,” you told him, “It’s also in the name of the shop.” He looked over as he finished putting food in his mouth, furrowing his eyebrows. You laughed at how his cheeks bulged out like a squirrel.
“What?” he asked. You put your hands up to surrender, waving a white flag. “You just looked cute,” you said, “Like a squirrel.” He whined, “Please don’t. I’ve heard that more than a squirrel has.” The store’s bell chimed and another boy came in, shouting Jisung’s name. He shot you an apologetic look as the boy came up to the register. “We’re late Jisung,” he scolded, “Your grandmother said you would be here. Since when did you like flowers?”
“I was just dropping off the sweets she asked me to.”
You stood there awkwardly, listening to the conversation between the two close friends. “Would you like some?” You asked, offering him a the platter of pastries and tea that sat idly on the counter. “I’m sorry that Jisung’s such a pain,” he winked and grabbed a scone, “I’m Minho.” You nodded. “____,” you told him. He grabbed Jisung’s hand and pulled him to the opposite side. “Thank you for the pastries,” Minho said, “but we have places to be.” Jisung waved politely as he was ushered out the door. You smiled to yourself, taking the rest of the saran wrap off of the platter and leaving it open to the customers that would’ve wandered in that day. You returned back to your usual business, today, you were arranging a make-up bundle. You knew this because it was a request for three dozen roses and baby’s breath, to be put in an elegant ceramic vase, and wrapped in red and white- for unity. The truth was, the guy who came in didn’t ask for all of that- what he had asked for was a huge apologetic gesture, something with roses- like in the movies.
It was almost the end of the work day, when Jisung walked in through the door. You were out in the back of the shop this time, maintaining some Astilbies* that you hadn’t gotten the chance to use in any arrangement yet. You had some music playing from a speaker, sitting on a stool nearby, so you hadn’t heard him come in. And when you had, it was only after you had hosed him with water thinking it was a robber. But in your defense, he had spooked you.
“I’m so sorry,” you rambled, “I thought you were going to rob my store-” He just laughed loudly. “It’s not a big deal,” he comforted, “Do you have a towel.” You nodded, motioning him to follow you. You clambered your way up the stairs into your apartment to grab a towel for the poor boy when you noticed he was looking over the large bundle of roses. “He must’ve messed up big time, huh?” Jisung asked, taking the offered towel, sitting on your stool. “What do you think he did?”
“Cheated on a wife probably,” you answered, thinking about how disheveled the man had been when he walked in, “He had a ring on his hand.” He nodded as put the roses on the shelf with the rest of the ready arrangements. “Are you here for the platter?” you asked, handing him the silver platter you had cleaned and brought down with the towels. He made an ‘O’ with his face. “Thank you for remembering,” he said, “I almost forgot.” He patted sadly at his still wet-shirt and looked up. “I don’t think it’s going to dry anytime soon.” You bit your lip. “I could,” you stammered, “I could wash them? But that might take longer than you going home, but I understand if you think it’s weird or-”
“Please,” he begged, “I don’t want to get on the bus to my grandmother’s all wet.” You nodded. “You can just head upstairs,” you explained, “I need to close the shop.” Your heart was beating, you were just trying to be trying to be polite- but weren’t totally sure of the implications you had made. You slowly made your way up the stairs, begging the stars that this wouldn’t take a weird turn, and thankfully it hadn’t. Jisung was standing in the middle of your apartment, which seemed to be filled with more greenery than the actual flower shop. “You really love your plants, huh?” he murmured, “Did you always want to be a florist?” You pulled a large shirt and sweatpants out of your and handed them to him. “Surprisingly, yes,” you answered, “But what about you? What do you do?” You led him to the bathroom and he shouted his answer from inside. “I do lots,” he said, “I’m in a band.” He handed you the folded wet clothes and you put them in your dryer. “Is it popular?”
He grinned, “We’re doing pretty good.” You both stood in the middle of the hallway in silence for a moment. “You must be pretty amazing with your words then,” you mentioned and he nodded, “Is Minho in your band?” He leaned against the wall. “Yeah!” He answered with a shine in his eyes as he talked about his music. You admired his passion as he talked on and on about what he and his band did.
The dryer beeped to signal it’s finish, interrupting the cute boy’s monologue. And you lead him back down to the flower shop’s entrance, but not before he stopped to look at the large amount of roses in the ceramic vase.
“Does every part of this arrangement have a meaning?”
You nodded in response. Red roses mean true love, the baby’s breath means long lasting love and the innocence in that unity,” you continued, “The red and white silk represent unity.”
“And do all flowers and stuff have meaning?”
“All of them.”
You hadn’t seen Jisung for a while now, ever since an incident during movie night. You had become close these past few months, and Jisung spent nearly all his free time with you. You were worried, but of course, there wasn’t much you could do.
However, one day you began to receive pressed flowers in short admiration letters. It took you by surprise the first time, so much so that you nearly dropped the letter. Your cheeks heated up as you looked around, looking for anyone who was standing idly nearby. But there wasn’t anyone. The first letter, or rather, note had several pressed gloxinia- the flower that represented love at first sight, and said: your flowers are almost as pretty as you.
As cheesy and tooth-achingly sweet as it was, it made you smile. This continued for a few more weeks, before Jisung happened to stop by. He sat on the counter and swung his legs. He filled you on everything that had been going on in the past four months, and shared every possible detail. “What about you?” He asked, “Anything new?” You shrugged, putting some red Hyacinths* in another arrangement for his grandmother. “Not really,” you answered, “I’ve been getting letters in the mail.” He wiggled his eyebrows. “Oh yeah?” he pushed, “What kind of letters.” You tilted your head as you thought. “Well, I wouldn’t call them love letters,” you said, “I think they’re more like, crush letters.” He nodded, avoiding your gaze. “Yesterday,” you added, “I got a white Camellia. It’s like saying someone’s adorable.”
“Who do you think it is?”
You furrowed your eyebrows, adding red carnations* to the bundle.
“I have no idea.”
You finished his grandmother’s bundle and handed him the bouquet. “You should stop by more,” you said quietly, “I’ve been missing you.” He made an ‘O’ face and turned so you couldn’t see his face heat up in embarrassment. “Sure,” he said, “No, yeah, definitely.”
The truth was, ever since you moved to Korea, you had been to scared to make new friends your age. Although you were quite popular with your customers, and the older folks that lived and had shops near your own- something about going out to public spaces made you nervous. But one day, Jisung came by your store. And in the midst of your usual banter, well, more like him yelling about his bandmates and music he asked you. “You should come out with me tonight,” he said, “We’re all meeting up to celebrate our album. You aren’t busy right?” You bit your lip, running your hand along the stem of an iris*. “I don’t know sungie,” he said, “Events like those make me nervous.” He grabbed your hand delicately. “I’ll be there with you,” he comforted, “Go get ready. I’ll close up shop.”
About half an hour later, Jisung was sprawled out on your couch, eating snacks from your cupboard and scribbling quickly in his songwriting notebook. “What are you writing?” you asked, plopping yourself next to him. “It’s a love song,” he said quickly, “Are you ready? We need to catch the bus.”
You would never outwardly say it, but you admired Jisung- you might’ve even had a slight crush on him. The sunset’s rays complimented his skin well as he dragged you to the bus stop. He was dressed as his usual self, but something was different when he held your hand tonight. He looked less like just a friend, and more like someone you could see yourself with.Your heart was beating, and your face felt like it was burning- like if you had a fever. As you sat on the bus, he lend you one of the earpieces of headphones so you could both listen to the song his band was working on.
You stared at his side profile as he explained the meaning behind this particular song, your heart about to burst through your chest as you sat in admiration of his passion. The bus driver called out your stop name, and Jisung had to bring you back down from cloud nine. “___!” he yelled, “We’re gonna miss our stop.” You apologized to the bus driver as you got off, Jisung pulling your arm to wherever they were going to meet. As you approached what seemed to be a karaoke bar, you noticed Minho and a group of boys standing outside the bar. “Hey, you’re ___,” Minho said, “The florist?” You nodded, saying a general hello to the group of boys. “Jisung,” a bandmate named Woojin scolded, “Aren’t you going to introduce her?” “But I already-” Woojin gave him a look and Jisung sighed. “Guys this is ___,” he explained, “___, this is Woojin, Chan, and surprisingly Felix, who isn’t late for once.” Felix opened his mouth to say something but closed it, opting to give a sad dab instead. “We’re sorry for the delay,” Chan added, “the rest of the boys are usually better about time.”
You held up your hands. “It’s alright.” A moment of silence passed before Chan engaged in some conversation. “So you’re a florist, right?” You nodded.
“Can you tell me what flowers I need to get that say “I want to un-adopt seven children’?”
You laughed. A smile stretching across your bright face as you started to relax a bit. “Well,” you explained,” a striped carnation symbolizes refusal and rejection, and hydrangeas are just the flower version of ‘screw you.’ if you come by, I can even make you a passive aggressive not to put in the bouquet.” This elicited a couple of hey!s from Felix and Jisung. Minho shrugged away the playful rejection. “Hey ___,” you turned to Minho and Jisung began to glare at him, while Minho just smirked, “What flower stands for ‘I’m completely and hopelessly devoted to you but I can’t tell you because I only have one brain cell?’” You furrowed your eyebrows and thought for a moment. “I don’t think there’s one single flower for that,” you added, “But a germanium symbolizes stupidity and a red camellia means you’re a fire in one’s loins.” You looked back at him. “Why?” you thought out loud, “Do you have a crush?” He clutched his shirt and reached for Jisung. “Of course not,” he exclaimed, “Jisung is the only one for me.” You laughed again, and nudged your friend. “When’s the wedding?” you teased, “I can make your arrangements.”
Jisung stuck his tongue out at the both of you and pulled you inside the karaoke bar, not caring that the boys had yet to arrive. But once the group had settled in, the rest of the boys arrived into the room. You learned that their names were Seungmin, Jeongin, and Changbin came in, apologizing for their late arrival. They all greeted you kindly, and everyone made sure that you were comfortable.
But, as the night grew older, you grew more and more anxious- a bad feeling settling in the pit of your stomach. But you ignored it, opting to listen to Woojin serenade the group for the ninth time that night, and after that, all the boys agreed that it was indeed time to go home. Most of them using you and Jeongin’s age as an excuse, but the both of you knew better. You bid your farewell to the boys and Jisung insisted on taking you home. You didn’t fight him, because you knew this wasn’t an argument you could win. The bus ride home was quiet, as you fell asleep on Jisung’s shoulder. You woke up suddenly, and you swore you caught Jisung’s eye looking fondly at you. But as you rubbed your eyes, you found that you had approached your stop. He took your hand again, and together you walked back to the shop.
For some reason, your heart was accelerating- and at first you though it was because once again, Jisung was holding onto your hand tightly. But as you found yourself in front of your flower shop, or rather, it’s remains. The glass windows were shattered, large pieces of glass littering the street and the inside of your store. Your flowers were trampled, and thrown all over the place- an incredibly catastrophic mess. As you made your way through the broken glass door that lay wide open, you found your vases and the arrangements all over the floor and the money, the money you had worked so hard to make. Everything you had done all by yourself, gone. Jisung was in front of you, holding your hand as the both of you hesitantly made your way up the stairs into your apartment. Your apartment was also trashed, and all the valuables you had brought from your native country- gone. That’s when you broke, flopping down to your knees and letting out harsh ugly sobs to mourn the wasted work you’ve done. Jisung cradled you as you heaved and let out stuttered breaths. “We should go,” Jisung whispered soothingly, “You can stay at my grandma’s.”
But before you left, you noticed a monkshood* flower upon your vanity.
*･ﾟﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*ﾟ:*:✼✿ ✿✼:*ﾟ:.｡..｡.:*･ﾟﾟ･*
a/n: here are the meanings of the flowers used in scenes!
hibiscus: personal glory, fame, beauty
astilbies: ‘i’ll wait for you’, patience in love
red hyacinth: playfulness
red carnation: my heart aches for you, admiration
iris: your friendship means so much to me
monkshood: beware, a deadly foe is near
#stray kids#stray kids fanfic#stray kids imagines#han jisung#han jisung fanfic#han jisung imagine#han jisung imagines#skz fic#skz imagines#skz han jisung#skz fluff#skz angst
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LIMBO 2/3
I’m per usual, late. But, I had this queued up originally and it didn’t go through so I made a pretty art thing so I didn’t kill someone. Yay.
Here is my first finished big piece for @cssns, a dark and gritty romance with heavy CaptainSwan, FrozenJewel and ScarletBelle themes. The second part will be posted later today, and the third late this evening. I have 2 more MCs to present and then I am blessedly finished.
Will Scarlet is dead, stuck in a plane of existence where all redeemable souls with unfinished business end up. Each soul is assigned a Guardian: A guide to help them navigate The Realm of the Living and to avoid pitfalls there. To Will’s great displeasure he is assigned the mirthless Emma Swan, who’s indifference to his pain infuriates him - until he finds that she harbors her own.
Rated: M
TW: Child death, Death in general, Angst with a… intrepretation of a happy ending? Idk, just be warned, don’t read this. I’m the Lemony Snicket of fic writers, look away.
Killian was vaguely aware that something was very amiss, if not downright wrong.
His last clear memories were celebrating his new position, one he’d painstakingly worked for years to achieve, his friends around him and Emma by his side. He had refused to drink at his own party, much to his friends’ consternation, but he wanted to remember everything about this night, every detail. Hopefully it was the last night Emma Swan would go without knowing she was to be Emma Swan-Jones in his ideal future. That is, if she’d accept, which with the way she had rested her head on his shoulder he was pretty sure wasn’t an issue.
“Things are good,” she’d whispered, leaning across the passenger side of their car to kiss him.
“Things are only going to get better.” He grinned and she laughed, poking him under the armpit, his body jerking. “Oi, that’s enough of that, now -”
“Tall orders, ‘only better’. Are you sure you can live up to that promise?” Her eyes had gotten darker, and he felt his mouth go dry.
“I am up for the challenge.”
“Then hurry home, sally forth, and all that - I have a present for you that you couldn’t unwrap here.” Her voice had gone husky and Killian felt for sure his pants were suddenly too tight.
They were driving home when Emma had screamed, he thought it was prank at first, but the lights were bright and they were right in their windshield as pain enveloped him. The roof of their car buckled as they rolled, he felt the crack against his skull and for a moment things went black. He could still hear, sounds of the crunch of metal and her strangled cry, and then his head throbbed, bringing back sight; gazing out, lights flashed into the dim. The back of his skull felt so wet and warm, and the top of his head was dripping as he tried to inventory his surroundings. They'd come to a stop at an angle and he'd noticed hazy smoke filling the car, Emma slumped forward with glass across her face. He dizzily noted how pretty it was in the light. Confused revulsion came next.
He unbuckled himself, surprised that the device still worked, and marveling at how squishy the air bag was, before trying to focus as spots spun in front of him. His brain felt wrong and infantile as he narrowed his thoughts, to come fighting the strange feeling of his body wanting to simply stop, exhaustion creeping up on him. Why couldn't he sleep?
Emma. Get Emma out. One of his arms was useless, a bloody mess he couldn’t get to follow commands. With his good arm, he undid her belt and grabbed under her armpits as well as he could, her head lolling as he dragged her over his seat. She was dragging something under her knee. He gathered her body close, and with sudden clarity understood as he touched her shattered kneecap - Her leg that had been bent in the passenger’s seat was crushed completely. Even through his stunted brain he knew this was bad.
Stumbling back, everything spinning, they fell to the cold asphalt. He saw Emma’s eyes open as what he realized was his scalp flopped over, his hand reaching up to touch wet bone. She reached for him as his vision burned away to darkness, his hand meeting hers the last touch he felt.
When Killian came to, he was alone in a hospital room sitting in a chair, noise filling the empty space. Part of his brain registered that this was eerily strange, unable to rationalize while the other soothed, calming him. This was normal. Things will make sense, everything will be fine.
Emma.
He stood, bare feet cold on the tiled floor. Beeps, whirrs, whispered voices and footsteps swirled around him although he was alone. If he focused, he could make out misty forms of people, like a flickering projector. Nurses roamed the halls, he could see their brightly colored scrubs now, the forms becoming clearer. Rubbing his eyes, he saw another chair next to the hospital bed where Liam sat, head in his hands.
He heard Liam’s sobs and apologies, how he should have given him the ring for Emma.
Bloody well right you should have, you great dolt.
Liam didn’t hear, and he only came back angrier. He talked about working extra hours, about how this was Emma’s fault, about incompetent staff and bad tea. Killian began to pace, the strange peace he had once felt fading. What was Emma’s fault? Certainly not this, whatever this was. Emma would never.
David’s voice. Asking if Liam was coming to the funeral, Liam telling him to get out. Killian raged in unheard fury, he was going to punch that bloody git in the face for talking to his brother-in-law like that - er. His almost brother-in-law. David had left and Killian caught a glimpse of him, his hair unkempt and eyes red rimmed. Who had died? David only had very little family, and Emma… He’d know if Emma was hurt. He felt a pang of uncertainty, the strangeness of his situation breaking through. Liam flickered in and out, standing and pacing, cursing under his breath.
“Why did you choose her? Why did you let her do this to you brother?” Liam slammed his fist into a cabinet, flickering out as his cries echoed in the room.
What is happening to me? Where am I?
Emma finally came to see him after he felt like he’d been there for months, wandering through the empty hospital when his room was quiet. He’d thought he may have heard her voice before, but like tuning for a frequency on a radio, he could never make out her words. He snapped back to his room the minute her words were in his ears. He couldn’t see her as well as his brother, falling to his knees in front of her. She laid across the hospital bed, unaware of his presence.
“Hi, babe.”
Emma, where have you been? Gods above, I’ve been worried sick about you, you’ve had me-
He could hear her voice hitch, and the small sniff of her nose.
Why are you about to cry, love?
“I don’t know if you can hear me -”
Of course I can, sweet, I’m right here, it’s alright —
“I just… I’m so scared and I miss you so much. I keep having dreams about the accident now that I can remember, I can remember you pulling me out. I wish you would wa-”
Her voice fizzled out as her shimmering form snuffed out like a candle. Killian desperately tried to... looking for her, looking for anywhere her voice would ring louder, or to find her strange smoky silhouette. He had no such luck. The strangeness of his new realm was now overwhelming, his inability to speak to anyone or get acknowledged maddening. A woman named Elsa whispered secrets about women he’d never met, and another woman named Ariel hummed softly filling the room in soothing music. He liked them.
Someone named Tremaine, and another, Ursula, he didn’t like. He hadn’t felt anything physically but a numbness that reminded him of when his feet fell asleep; when those two flickered into being he felt pain. Killian realized finally that he was somehow outside of his body and something was preventing him from understanding this situation.
Emma came again. He could see her better, his clarity of people and things much clearer as time had passed. Instead of a smoky haze, she was a faded photo negative, a washed out sepia. When he tried to touch her there was no resistance as if she was air.
“I’m supposed to let you go. That’s what Regina says, that I should ‘move on,”
Well, tell ‘Regina’ to bugger right on off then, love.
“And I know that’s what you’d want, you wouldn’t want me to wait for you,”
Whoa now, wait a minute, of course I want you to wait for me, I just need to get ! Move on? Emma, what the bloody hell are you on about woman, are you mad?
“The thing is, I can’t, Killian. Just…” her voice broke and she sobbed, he found himself longing to hold her. “I love you so much. Please, don’t hate me for wanting you.”
I could never hate you Emma, please, don’t cry. It’s alright, I could never tire of you wanting me.
It became a cycle, Liam, Elsa, Ariel and Tremaine with Emma popping up here and there.
Killian began to understand, even if he didn’t want to believe.
“That brother of yours is a real asshat,” Elsa hissed, wearing blue and fiddling with an IV bag. Killian read a magazine left open, enjoying any stimulation he could find. “I hope you can’t hear the bastard.”
You don’t even know. He’s an insufferable stubborn git on his best days.
“If I could move you to another hospital I would. Best in the country, bollocks. Can’t even make a proper cup of tea.” Liam thumbed through a book, sipping out of a styrofoam cup. Killian wished for a moment he could enjoy any cup of anything. He’d started to feel thirst, a strange heat and chill that came without warning, and pain in his abdomen.
Liam, I wish I could move that giant head of yours out of your ass.
“I miss hearing your voice, Killian.” Liam let out a small laugh, rubbing his eyes. “You’d be telling me where to shove it right now.” His voice wavered, eyes becoming watery. “I don’t know how to be without you. You were my balance, my levity. Even during this feud... I’m so sorry, I just wanted you to make the right choices.”
I miss you too Liam. I missed you when you were convinced my happiness was too risky. I just wanted you to be proud of me.
“I wish I could tell you how proud I am of you. I went by your home, I saw your designs and the proposal for the restoration of that frigate. It was… I’m so sorry I ever doubted you.” Liam cried openly, and Killian felt the walls of his reality crumbling slowly. He was pulled, a strong yank of some force he could not fight that sent him spiraling into darkness. A shrill beeping alarm sounded, Liam yelling as footsteps flooded in, a fire filling him with agony. There was a light, and he reached for it, begging for help as he was pulled further and further away.
He woke again to Emma’s gentle cries, the darkness dissipated. He sat in the bed, confused.
“You almost died, and I… I was happy for a moment. I’m so sorry, I just wanted…” Her sobbing was uncontrolled, her shoulders shaking. “I am so selfish, Killian, please wake up. Meet someone else, live your life, have children, please.”
Emma… You wanted me to…?
Killian’s reality crumbled into dust. He had almost died? A force compelled him to look behind him.
Turning to look at the bed, he saw himself, or what was left of himself. Tubes ran through his mouth, his hair was shaved to the scalp, as artificially steady breaths were pumped into his system. His frame was smaller, chest almost concave and bandaged.
Emma, you’re…?
“I just want to see you happy. I don’t want this for you, I want you to live, to open your eyes.”
You’re alive, you’re alive, Emma, you’re alive and we’ll go back home, we’ll go back and everything will be -
“I wish I hadn’t died. I wish you and I had lived the life we deserved.”
No. No, Emma, how can you be - What are you?
“I’ve decided to wait, regardless of anything. I’m not giving up on you. You’re a survivor.” He watched her stroke his body’s face, slender fingers he tried to hold without success. “I’m going to become a Guardian. I’ve already started training, and it will give me more time to visit you. I love you, more than anything.”
She disappeared where he could not follow, leaving him alone in limbo.
Killian began to walk, aimlessly exploring while lost in his thoughts of Liam, Emma, and - surprisingly - his mother. Threading his memories and what he’d heard from stray bits of conversation together, a picture appeared. There had been an accident. Emma had… He struggled to even think about it, but she had died. He had survived, if you could call it that. Chained to a bed by encroaching brain death, his freedom lost to machines holding him in stasis.
A stasis that created this world of watching. Killian was a spectator as his body fought, wondering if he’d live or die as he suffered through infections and experimental treatment.
Liam willed him to live, Emma willed him to live, and Killian… he simply wanted to be heard.
He talked to Emma, answering her and wondering what he’d do if she answered back. She never did. Hearing her voice was enough still. He loosely tried to keep track of time, but he noted the date when she brought a man with her. He’d noticed her appearance changing with sadness, her loose curls pinned tight and her posture going prim. She’d reverted to her walled state, untouchable and unable to be hurt or abandoned.
The man - she’d called him Will - opened the drawer of photographs Liam had hidden away. Killian loved their pictures. He’d taken millions of photos of them, millions more of Emma as he mapped her body in every way possible. One of his favorite rattled in the drawer, a timed picture on a ship he rented, them kissing on the deck standing still with lips pressed together at dusk for what felt like ages.
The resulting photo was gorgeous - a silhouette of them against moving stars and sunset colors. Laying under a blanket they’d talked for hours. She had turned to him, a serious look on her face that at first scared him.
She said with a serious look they needed to talk, and he’d panicked, terrified of what she’d say. The words left her mouth and his heart flip flopped in his chest, until her laughter bubbled over as he hugged her closer.
She’d told him she’d changed her mind - having a baby wouldn’t be so bad.
This Will closed the drawer, and Killian watched as he returned to talk to Emma.
"When I first started coming here, after understanding I'd have to move on, I thought he responded to me. I thought," she looked up and swiped at her eyes and cheeks, "I thought he could hear me and I was some savior that would bring him back to me.”
Oh, my sweet Swan. I do hear you. I’ve never left you, and you’ve never left me.
“I wanted, sometimes I still want..." she let out a sob and looked at the plug near him where wires ended in thick black plugs.
In some ways he wished she would unplug him.
He watched as Liam trashed Emma again and again, his brother’s pain pinpointed into hatred for someone who couldn’t defend herself. Emma, in her grace, pushed Liam together with his nurse, and Killian watched his brother’s hatred melt away into love, a man Killian had never seen emerging from his pain.
Their pictures went back up, Killian marveling at Emma and his smiling face out in the open again. Emma always lingered near one he knew was her favorite, autumn leaves bright as they laughed.
They stood next to each other, one unaware of the other. He ached. Even after she left he ached, the ache turning into worse pain. Another nurse came in, finding the problem. Tremaine had left a bandage unchanged.
Emma stayed with him as pain continued to return, and his nurses fought to keep him stable. She murmured about staying too long, and he watched her move like clockwork making sure things were in order. For the first time in ages, she flickered. Days went by and she continued to fade, staying longer with him.
She disappeared shortly after, Liam gone as well. It was quiet, the nurses’ footsteps and scratched pen to clipboard the only noises he heard. His body began to burn. The familiar feeling of infection running wild through him, but somehow worse. The familiar snap back into darkness was an unwelcome guest, his veins made of fire that lit to an inferno. Machines began to beat off the chart, the familiar light showing up in his peripheral.
He heard Liam’s yells, and then there was brightness, brightness that blinded him and dazzled his eyes, pain taken away in an instant of light flowing through him.
When he blinked, he sat before a smiling man in a tweed suit, a cricket pin on his lapel.
“Hello Mr. Jones. Welcome.”
“What - I died?”
The man blinked, scratching his ginger hair and adjusting his glasses. “Well, um, yes. Most people don’t remember -”
“I need to find someone. I think she’s here, I -”
“Mr. Jones, calm down if you will, please. We have to talk about -”
“I don’t give a damn, I need to find her, I need to find her now!”
“Mr. Jones, that’s not how things work, there’s rules and procedures -”
“What part of ‘I do not give a damn’ did you not understand, mate?” Killian’s voice rose and the man cowered slightly. A door behind him flew open, Killian turning with his jaw set.
“Oi! What’s this then, trouble, Hopper? Listen here -” Recognition crossed both the faces of Killian and the man before him, sudden understanding blinking into existence. “You!”
Killian actually laughed, a grin starting on his face. “My reputation precedes me, I see. Will. Finally I get to say hello.” Will glanced down, and when he looked up gave him an uneasy look. “Where is she?”
Turning to the man still clinging to his chair, Will nodded towards Killian. “Hopper, uh, this is… This is Emma’s…”
Hopper’s face paled more, his lips pulling down. “Oh no.”
Killian repeated himself, anxiety rising in his chest. “Where is she? Where is Emma?”
Will sighed. “It’s a long story, and… Look, ‘ave a seat. We’re going to be here for a bit.”
“Is Emma alright?” Killian felt his anxiety grow into full blown fear, fists clenching as his body tensed.
Will looked at him with pity, and Killian could feel his heart breaking. He sank into a chair as Will wrung his hands, eyes becoming glassy.
“No. I’m so sorry, but Emma… Emma is gone.”
Elsa took a week off, using her rarely touched vacation days and citing a family emergency, causing her sympathetic friends and coworkers in the ward no surprise. For the first time in what felt like decades, the patient room on the corner was empty; a stark and vacuous reminder of how fragile things were. Tremaine had been fired, much to many nurses’ relief, and when Liam had not come back to collect many of Killian's items, they were put down to be boxed up and put in a cabinet for pickup or eventual shipment.
The nurse that had the sad task of preparing Mr. Jones’ room for a new patient was Ariel, her heart heavy as she packed picture after picture away. She was surprised how cold it was in the room, checking the thermostat and finding it set to a normal 71°; the cold made no sense. That would need to be checked, she noted. When she reached for a particular frame of the patient carrying a blonde haired woman on his back, both laughing, she felt an intense feeling of someone watching her, boring holes through her being. She touched the frame, and it shot out of her reach towards the empty bed, landing squarely in the middle as the lights flickered.
She shrieked, running out of the room, and to the nursing station.
“Ariel, what the heck -” another nurse, Ella, hissed at her.
“That room- room 305! The lights and that- a picture! It flew!” Ariel was obviously shaken, and refused to go back in there even as her boss was called to press her.
“I'm down two nurses already, please just get someone to take care of it,” he'd intoned in his nasally voice.
By the time he came in the next day, none of the nurses would go in the room, even with the pictures removed. By the time Elsa returned the next week, it was a hospital wide rumor. Elsa had immediately laughed, as at precisely 4:07 pm on the dot the lights flickered, her immediate belief that it was an insensitive joke the team was playing. Solemn faces met hers.
“Watch, Elsa.” Whispered Aurora, pointing to the door. “In three minutes, that door is going to fly open by itself.”
Elsa looked around for a clock, noticing only now the small groups from other departments milling around and watching. Even some patients had joined to watch, and she felt her stomach turn uneasily. The clock showed time passing in the slowest of measure, and for a moment the ward was quiet enough to hear a pin drop. Nothing happened, but as she turned to tell Aurora off, the door slammed open as lights flickered, papers on the nursing station fluttering around in an icy breeze.
“The paper thing is new,” Aurora commented, casually. The lights above them flickered, along with a few down the hallway as people gasped and in a few cases (one being Dr. Whale) screamed curses. “So… is that...” Aurora said more nervously. When the nursing station’s cabinet doors ripped open with a clatter, spilling contents, Aurora yelped along with a majority of the Ward's staff, Ariel almost in tears. “That is definitely new,” Aurora hissed.
Elsa could only gape as the lights returned. She had a sudden memory come to mind, snapping her fingers, and turned to Aurora.
“There's a nanny cam still in that room, from before when Li…” she paused, took a deep breath and collected herself “When the last patient was here. I'll grab it and we'll see if this is actually a haunting.”
Before she could be convinced otherwise, Elsa walked into room 305.
It was cold, dark and empty, nothing amiss as far as she could tell as she walked to the shelf she'd tucked the camera behind, in between rolls of paper towels and extra gowns. Pulling the camera down and carefully removing the memory card, she turned back to the door. As she made her way back, an item caught her eye on the bedside table. A photo frame. Squinting, she walked over to it. A picture of Liam's brother and his girlfriend? She picked it up and left.
“I thought all of these were taken out to give to his family?” Elsa asked, placing it on the nursing station’s counter.
Aurora blinked at her, and Ariel became caught in hysterics again. “Elsa, we did. Where did you get that?”
“You couldn't have. It was in there on the bedside table.” Elsa was exasperated at this point. She tried to check Aurora's face for any sort of tell, but only got a look of fear.
“Elsa… I taped that box up myself, and half the people here watched. None of us were or are going back in there. Go look, it's in the bottom cupboard.”
Elsa walked to the cupboard, opening the door to find a sealed box with Liam's name on it. The seal was unbroken.
Logging onto her computer, she plugged in the memory card to look at the video files. The camera had promised “120 days of continuous video!” when she bought it, and she had changed the cards right before the Fourth of July so it had plenty of memory. She opened the files, noting that they were separated by month. July was first, and she clicked through a few, watching Liam and her until it became too painful.
She skipped to August, to the night… She took a breath, and clicked on the night the patient had passed. A video of the nurses rushing in, and his furious progression into organ failure. Liam's frame making it just in view for a moment before he was pushed out. Their team working frantically until slowly, they trickled out leaving Liam, his brother and the doctor alone.
Finally the doctor left, and Liam sat alone for hours until his brother was taken to the morgue, leaving only then. Elsa refused to cry, tears spilling over anyway as she wiped them away. This wasn't what she was here for. The next day began automatically. Nothing. An empty room. At 2:45pm, a breeze moved the bedsheets of the cot slightly, but nothing was amiss.
The next day, the same, the bed sheets moved slightly around 2:45pm, and Elsa presumed rationally that is when the AC kicked on. That day however, the bedsheets moved more forcefully, as if an unseen hand was pulling them.
The third day, Ariel stepped in around 1:00pm and began collecting personal effects. She moved to pictures on the bedside, and looked around shivering. When she reached for a photo, the lights flickered and when they turned back on Elsa could see the picture on the bed just as she described as she ran out of the room. At 2:45, the bedsheets on the bed smoothed around the picture frame. Elsa blinked, and rewound. As if by magic, the wrinkles and any crooked corners smoothed around the picture frame.
The next day, an exhausted looking Hans walked in, coffee in hand at 8:15am to collect the picture on the bed, shaking his head and calling towards the door. When he touched the frame, the bed shook as the lights flickered, his coffee spilling everywhere. A janitor arrived at slightly after 9 to clean up the spill and remove the picture, only to have every drawer thrown open. Finally, Dr. Bell stomped in, took the picture and stomped out at 4:07, the door to the room slamming itself open and shut several times as the camera’s picture distorted.
Elsa watched in fascination, confusion and terror as she fast forwarded to today's date, watching as the bedside table remained empty. Silence for days besides the door slamming, until she came to where she walked into the room. As she picked the camera up with her face taking up most of the shot, a dark, shadowy, form sat on the bed, placing a picture frame on the bedside table.
He was halfway through a glass of amber liquid when the email appeared in his inbox, Liam almost deleting it on the spot. His phone was set straight to voicemail in hopes of aiding his ambition to drink, unable to think about the quiet burial on a rainy morning. The bottom of a bottle was soothing, the only noise the clink of glass or the sound of things he’d broken. He’d forgotten the ping of emails on his laptop until the noise broke through a hangover.
“Please respond - Killian’s belongings” from a hospital email, the nurse who had called him the night that… He pushed the memory from his mind, not opening the message. The next day, another email arrived. “Urgent!!! - Please get these items!!!” again from this Ariel, desperate for him to answer. This time he did delete the messages, watching as they populated in his trash folder.
He didn’t hear from her again for a few days, when another message appeared. “Viral Video - In case you see it online first: rm305 ghost?” His confusion was only matched by his anger. He opened the message to find a short message, followed by a video link.
“Mr. Jones,
I hate to reach out to you like this, but your brother has some items here that are causing some issues and we have unable to reach you by phone. We recently have had some problems in rm 305, and while it was only a hospital issue, a video regarding the situation has leaked to YouTube. You are not on these recordings, but considering the nature of them, I wanted to let you know.
We don’t know who leaked them, only that the things in this video cannot be disproven. There may even be an investigation with how much of an issue these occurrences are causing, and they have closed down our ward. The hospital is working diligently to find who leaked this, but we have no leads yet.
I know this may sound crazy, but I think you should watch this and consider coming by.
-Ariel Maidon”
Clicking the link took him to a video called, “ROOM 305 GHOST MERCY HOSPITAL”, and he felt his eyes narrow. The video started off with the blurred face of a nurse gathering photos into a box as she looked around the room anxiously. He recognized them immediately: Killian’s prized collection of photos once displayed on his mantle. The nurse reached for a frame, and the lights flickered, the picture appearing in the hospital bed.
Liam was beyond livid. This was a mockery, some fool’s insensitive way to make money off of his brother. He went to grab his phone and call his lawyer, when Elsa’s face came into frame, blurred out but unmistakable. Circled behind her was a black shadow figure, holding a framed picture. Elsa was in on this? His rage boiled over, speaking to his lawyer in clipped tones.
Slamming his thumb onto the red end call button, he hung up, feelingt more anger than before : The video showed nothing of him or his brother, nor was it his own intellectual property. There was nothing he could do except talk to the hospital. After another tumbler or two of rum, he resigned himself. Sending an email to Elsa, he asked her to tell him what she knew about this ‘ghost’.
When Belle went home, it was as if nothing had changed, like she’d decided to turn around instead of heading to school. Will was waiting at the bus stop where she’d left him years ago. The best friend who she’d abandoned forgave her instantly, his crooked smile everything she needed. Even when she sobbed into his embrace, he let her be.
Will at first simply protected her, and she helped him come up with ideas for businesses. Where he felt his skills were limited, Belle saw potential. He picked their lock for fun one night after they had drinks, showing her how insecure her place was, and she’d suggested locksmithing. He’d smiled over his beer.
The first time Gold sent someone for Belle she’d been terrified. The ogre of a man had broken down her door, locks and all, yelling at her about squealing to an informant. She’d denied it, screaming for help. Luckily her landlord had called the police and the distant sirens had scared the stranger off. The first person she’d called was Will. He’d set her up in a different place, until she was found again, and then again in a hotel she’d rented. Finally after she noticed someone following her, she’d begged Will for help. His business in town was having no success due to his reputation so he made her an offer.
“Let’s move away. Come with me.”
If her heart warmed for the first time since she lost Gideon, she pretended not to notice.
In a new apartment, in a new town, they settled into a routine. Belle had saved a large sum of money in a hidden bank account for her and Gideon to escape if they needed to, planning on running years ago but always being too scared. She purchased a small shop space, devoted to books, becoming quite the collector of old or discontinued print items. Will’s locksmith business was also taking off, and they found themselves happily eating dinners together or sitting and watching a movie together after long days.
Belle made the first move, tentatively laying against him and bring Will’s arm over the dip in her side, snuggling into him. A soft kiss on the cheek came next as a thank you for a birthday cake and a framed picture of Gideon and her together. A full kiss that left them both breathless after his team had won the World Cup, which turned into a long and slow session of kissing on their couch.
Things went slow. Belle’s heart healed and reset, a friendly love turning into something more. His hand found hers at the movies, hers snaking into his when they found time to go for walks. Will listened to her cry and comforted her through bouts of sorrow so deep and dark she could not see an end. Even then, he’d waited patiently without pushing anything a all until she sought him, laughing when she told him why they shouldn’t be together: because love is terrible.
“I dunno. I’ve had unrequited love since 6th grade or so, and it’s hard, but never terrible. The only pain I ever got from it was watching her suffer, but watching her heal has helped a lot.”
There was warmth in her chest like when she first kissed Gold, but this time it had dimension, layers, a foundation without cracks. At night when she thought more about it, she remembered Will running to her, or his promises when she would visit him and stare through the glass at his guilty face. Crawling out of bed and laying next to his body, Belle watched him stir, holding her breath. Will’s surprised blinks through grogginess are at first in shock, then happiness, as he gathered her into him.
“If this turns out to be a dream, I’ll be right pissed off,” he mumbled sleepily, and she laughed, falling asleep with him.
Her old room was bigger with an ensuite, but his bed more comfortable. After what felt like a day of torture, his bed now in her room and her lumpy mattress rested on the curb, they had purchased a desk for a new home office where Will could run things run things instead of from the living room. When he suggested a date to celebrate, they ended up dancing through the aches left from moving furniture all day and medicating with a Long Island special that left her drunk.
She’d begged him over sloppy kisses to touch her, and heard his groans as needy as hers. When she woke up clothed, Will greeted her with coffee.
“You’re going to have one helluva hangover, love.” He smiled sympathetically.
“We didn’t?”
“No. Until you’re ready, and can tell me when you’re sober to the point I believe you won’t regret it, I’d never.” He sipped his coffee on the edge of the bed. “I’m an idiot, and probably a fool, but not a monster.”
She’d cried, smiling like an idiot and confusing the hell out of him as he went to put his arms around her.
“Hey, hey, it’s alright -” rubbing her arms with his hands, as she shook her head.
“Will, I love you.”
Regina, Ruby, and Ruby’s charge made their way to Hopper’s office at a run, his call to them punctuated by bursts of yelling and the breaking of the various ceramics he had collected. Regina had no patience for this sort of thing. If she had a choice, she’d be sipping a martini while being fanned by a number of muscular men - but this was The Inbetween, not Paradise.
Ruby, on the other hand, was annoyed for an entirely different reason, watching the student she’d traded Hopper files and a week’s worth of pay for buttoning his fly as they ran to Hopper’s aid. Graham, a zoologist and nature filmmaker. They’d bonded over a love of wolves, the outdoors, and dying woefully single while still gorgeous. She liked the way his name tasted on her lips, and he just liked the way she tasted. Whatever this call was, it had better be good.
It was.
Will stood, red faced and panting, facing a dark haired and half crazed looking stranger. The stranger chucked something at him with a snarl, before launching himself at Will who was busy dodging. Regina’s eyes went wide, a muttered swear before she dragged the stranger back.
“What the hell,” Regina pulled back on the dark haired man’s form as he struggled against her chokehold, “is going on here?” She thought for a moment he looked familiar, but could not place where.
“Will! Are you alright? Who is that?” Ruby ran to WIll, noticing a trickle of blood beginning to disappear on his forehead. “Jesus, how many times did he hit you?”
Archie chimed in, poking his head up over his desk chair. “A lot, they’ve been going at it blow for blow, and my mediating isn’t working, because Will -”
“It’s my fault, let him hit me.” Will spat blood, and Ruby’s eyes turned back to the stranger. “I told him he could, and I deserve it.”
Escaping Regina’s grip for a moment, the stranger lunged again rasping out words in his rage.
“Bloody right it’s your fault, she’s not here and she waited! Emma waited for me, and you let her…” He let out a sound of anguish. “You bastard, you should have noticed -”
Regina’s eyes widened as she pulled the man back into a head lock, recognition finally lighting her eyes. “Oh, shit.” She leaned her arm back, tightening on his windpipe. “Well. It is you, isn’t it? Killian?”
Killian wheezed in her grasp. “Bad form to hit a lady, let me go so I can -”
Ruby blinked, finally putting the pieces together. “Wait, is he? You’re Killian? Like, Emma’s unfinished business?”
Will nodded. “I told him I’d take him to her, but we can’t fix it. We can’t fix…” His shoulders dropped, fists balled as he looked away. “He can take it out on me. It’s not like I won’t heal from it. He can push me off rooftops as far as I’m concerned at this point.”
“Don’t you dare cry for her!” Killian snarled again, shaking with rage.
Ruby’s face fell, Graham moving over to wrap an arm around her waist. Regina’s grip softened, but as Killian moved to lunge again, she grabbed his wrist twisting his arm. He was forced to a kneel, her grip a vice that he couldn’t escape.
“Don’t you dare tell us not to cry for her.” Regina spoke in a low voice, wavering at the end of the sentence. “I watched as she sat with you for hours. Will was her charge. Ruby and Hopper tried to make her laugh. We were her friends. Emma told us everything there was about you.”
“He ate so healthy, when he wakes up the hospital food will drive him insane.” Ruby imitated in a pitch perfect imitation of Emma. Killian turned, a glare softening. “And she’d imitate you: ‘How dare you give me bloody gelatin,’ with a smile.”
“She said we’d be fast friends, more than once. Should ‘ave known it’d come to blows.” Will looked up, crying. “She was my best friend here. Her home is right next to mine -”
“Emma had a home here?” Killian interrupted in a quiet voice.
Will nodded. “I don’t know if it will stay up, though, I’ve been watching for looters or anyone poking around. I won’t let anyone take the last fragments of her.”
There was a pause, heavy silence falling over the room.
“I’ll take you, if you want.” Regina bent down laying a hand on Killian’s shoulder and releasing her grip. He shook her off, glaring ahead at Will.
“No. He can take me.” Killian nodded at Will, who walked to the door without a word before turning to look at Hopper, sitting in his desk chair.
“Hopper, have his file on my desk. I’ve got this one.” Will left, and Killian followed behind, shoes crunching on shards of ceramic. They headed for the residential area in silence.
Emma’s home was undisturbed, one of Will’s charges sitting on the porch.
“Hey Will!” She waved, red hair falling everywhere. “I didn’t expect you to be back so early, but no one has tried anything.”
“Thanks Merida. I’ll see you later.” He waved her off, even as she cast strange looks at the man behind him. Looking back, Killian’s jaw was set, face set in quiet anger, softening as he saw Emma’s home. He stared ahead at the small house, and Will approached, touching the sea glass windchime near the door.
“She said it was for good luck,” Will said quietly. Killian nodded, his face crumbling.
“We had one at home.” Joining Will on the small porch, he gently touched a piece of sea glass, listening to the chiming pieces. “I guess they didn’t work.”
Will opened the door, and as soon as Killian stepped inside his anger was replaced with longing and grief. Leaning in the doorway, Will watched Killian take a few steps, breathing in the cinnamon and vanilla scent of her, breaking into tears. Touching her things, soft blankets on a red leather couch, paintings of the sea under the stars or a VW bug the color of sunshine. A buttercup growing in a pale blue pot, closely guarded, brought sobs through a smile, but a sketchbook filled with scratched kohl drawings of him brought actual laughter.
“She never liked to draw. Only painting, and even then she didn’t like me to watch.” Killian’s voice was a hoarse whisper.
“Things get boring here if you don’t find new hobbies. She started that because…” Will looked suddenly uncomfortable.
“What? I’m done punching you, mate.”
“She started that because she said she was forgetting you,” Will murmured. The sentence filled the room, stretching into guilt so heavy it ached on their shoulders. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s… It’s alright. Can you take me to her? I’m ready.” Killian pulled a pillow into his embrace, closing his eyes.
“I can, sometimes time moves funny here, so a few weeks have past. I’m going to tell you though, we can’t fix this. So are you planning on staying with her?” Will cast his glance down, already knowing the answer.
“If that’s what it takes to be with her.”
“You won’t be with her though, you’ll be looking for her for eternity. Haunts don’t react to one another unless it’s drastic - Like a murder or trauma.” Will’s voice rose. “Emma wouldn’t want you to -”
“Don’t tell me what Emma would have wanted.” The dangerous low growl was back, Killian’s eyes narrowed. “She’s not here, because of you. Take me to her.”
Will sighed. A puff of gray smoke and they were in a hospital hallway, Killian feeling sick from the pull in his navel. The lights were off, yellow tape on his old room and the ward doors, but someone was there and yelling.
“What did you do!”
Liam’s voice? Killian blinked. What the hell was his brother doing here? Peeking around the corner, two figures sat in the empty nurses’ station. Liam looked a right mess, his hair unruly, dark circles under his eyes, and the beginnings of a beard growing.
“I didn’t do anything. I promise you.” Elsa’s voice pleading. “Liam, you look terrible. You shouldn’t be here. This was a mistake on my part, When I got your email I thought you…”
Liam grunted. “You thought I what? Was coming to take you back on a date after you showed me proof of a ghost? A ghost that you made up just to garner sympathy?”
“Liam. Please. I thought -”
“Stop thinking and show me the damn ghost like you said you would.”
Killian could rip Liam’s head off, someone caring for his stubborn arse more than anything only to be pushed away by pain.
As if on cue, Will whispered, “Your brother is a prat and a damned asshole.” Killian actually managed a small sad grin at that and nodded.
“If you only knew.” A light flickered with a shower of sparks, and Killian could see something building into a shrouded figure within his old room. Emma. She was here.
“Here we go,” whispered Elsa.
At her words, everything in his old room trembled like an earthquake had hit. Killian turned to Will, extending a hand.
“I’m not sorry for punching you, but thanks. For everything. You were there for her when I couldn’t be, and I can’t be angry at that. Goodbye,” Killian said with a nod, and Will shook his hand. He walked into the chaos that was ensuing in the room, listening to his brother’s protests of fake effects.
Emma stood in the middle of the room, a silent wail coming from her mouth as she shuffled towards the nurses station. A mixture of white and grays, faded to an opaque mix of mist that curled like a thick fog rolling in made up an image of her. There was no color, no blonde hair or green eyes, no flush of pink on her cheeks; her lips once a pale rose lost. Her face contorted in fury instead, tendrils of the haze that surrounded her pulsing out as things shook, knocking anything near her over. Pictures of them littered the floor, broken glass everywhere.
“Emma, oh, love.” Killian tried to embrace her, but a cold chill entered his being like being dropped into ice water. She moved through him and he could hear her scream of grief. She was unfazed by his appearance, unable or unwilling to see him. Making her way out the door towards Liam and Elsa, the world shuddered around her. The tape covering the room broke as the nurses’ station’s contents flew everywhere, pelting Liam and Elsa. Liam yelled, a computer keyboard ripping off the desk as drawers and cabinets flying open and shut. Killian could barely hear him above the noise, watching Emma in her wrath. Emma cried, neck straining and cabinet doors fell off their hinges, yanked free as the contents exploded.
“Liam! Look out!” Elsa was screaming about something as she pushed him out of the way, a light shattering where he was before, the piece splitting to hit her in the back of the head. Her body went limp over his.
“We need to get out of here, damn it all, what even is this?” Liam tried to clear a pathway, protecting himself from the hurricane-like debris that rained down on him. “Elsa?” He shook her and she let out a moan without opening her eyes. “No, Elsa, c’mon love.” Liam pulled her further into him, shielding her with his frame.
Killian reached through Emma again, desperately trying to grasp her. “Emma, you’re hurting people, you need to stop!” The roar he heard from her was like an oncoming train. He was thrown away, his own form roughly hitting a wall. Will tried to approach Emma’s form but was thrown as well, her anger practically an electric current running through the air.
Emma only stared at Liam, gently shaking Elsa’s shoulders. She raised a finger, pointing at him. The nurses station and cabinets began to rock, Liam trying to scoot away while being battered from all sides. Killian fought through whatever force surrounded her, arms out to protect himself and reached for her hand. The cabinets rocked harder, brackets splitting the drywall that held them in place. A filing cabinet fell, trapping Liam and Elsa in the nurses’ station, Liam pulled her tightly into his chest, pressing her into him.
“Emma!” Killian reached again, moving closer. “Emma I’m here, I’m here to stay with you!” His hand caught hers, finally grasping something corporeal. Her eyes were on his suddenly, cabinets still rocking but wind lessening. “It’s me love, Killian. I’m here.”
“I couldn’t find you. I was alone, again.” Emma’s voice was the quietest whisper, everything stopping and going still as she looked at him.
“I know. I’m sorry.” Taking several steps forward, he kissed her forehead. “I’m here now. I’ll stay with you, it’s alright.”
“Always?” Warmth met his palms, once cold and stiff. Emma’s fingers wove themselves into his, interlocking. “You’re really here?”
“I’ll never stop fighting for us. I would follow you to the end of the world, and obviously the next.”
“Killian, it’s really you.” Emma let out a laugh, the noise beautiful to his ears. She peppered his face with kisses, laughing at the smile that crept on his face. Her body felt solid in his arms, mist fading away until her eyes were the green he dreamt about.
“Aye, it’s really me.” They laughed, and he spun her in a circle. Will watched in awe at Emma cupping Killian’s face, laughing through tears. He glanced to where Elsa and Liam had been, watching as Liam pulled them out of the nurses’ station now that no debris was flying. A cut on his forehead dripped, and Elsa stirred.
“Liam… You’re bleeding?” She touched the scrape, and he brushed her hand away.
“It’s fine, I’m more concerned about you. Are you alright?” Liam touched the back of her head gingerly, and she winced. “If it’s any consolation, I believe you. That was insane -”
“It’s not normally this bad. I don’t know what made it worse this time…”
Killian smiled. “They’ll be alright, I think.”
Emma returned his knowing look. “I missed you so much.”
Pressing his lips against hers, they kissed, white light blinding in the room. They glowed as the world disappeared, along with all the pain that had been sitting for so long. Emma’s lips moved in perfect sync with his, hands feeling her waist; pulling her closer, making the kiss deeper, more passionate. A gentle golden sparkle and they were gone, leaving a bewildered Liam, Elsa, and Will.
Elsa and Liam glanced at each other, still sitting in his lap. She moved to crawl a few feet, staring at the spot where two very clear figures had embraced passionately - one, for sure, being Liam’s brother.
“Did you see that?” Liam whispered. “Please tell me you just saw that and I’m not imagining things because I’ve gone mental -”
“Your brother and his girlfriend? Either that or we are hallucinating due to a multitude of factors.”
“What the hell just happened?” Liam shook his head, rubbing the heel of his palm firmly against his forehead.
“I don’t know, honestly.” Elsa laughed, looking up at him. “I may have a concussion, but I feel like they - or something - found peace. I don’t know, I guess. This room is just suddenly filled with so much love. It feels like...” Her gaze turned downwards and away.
“I’m sorry.”
Elsa looked up at him, her head cocked. “For what?”
“Where should I start? Elsa, I’m an idiot and I miss you -” She raised a finger to silence him.
“Liam, I can’t. I loved you. I still…” Looking away, her fingers picked at her braid. “I can’t be like we were.”
“I understand.” Liam stiffened, nodding with a mask of indifference to cover his disappointment.
“I’d like to start over. Maybe we can try again? You just got over losing someone, and I’d love to be there to help you get through it.” Elsa smiled, and Liam’s heart began to pound.
“Pending concussion and or gas inhalation, would you like to get dinner tonight?” He began to stand, helping her up. She picked debris off of him, running her hands down his chest.
“Italian?” Elsa looked up and met his eyes, seeing the same feelings mirrored there.
“Anything you want.”
#3rd#August#2018#August 3rd 2018#LIMBO#limbo 2/3#CSSNS#cssns fanfic#cs supernatural summer#courtorderedcake#tumblr hates me#dammit#captain swan#cs ff#cs au#frozen jewel#bah humbug#I'm so close to being done#I can taste it
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Papa Don’t Preach
(ive been wanting to use this gif forever)
Warnings: a little NSFW in the second scene, but otherwise there’s not much else. Swearing.
Words: 2,446
Summary: “Madonna's 'Papa don't preach' -Billy x Reader In which the reader's dad knows the boy's no good but she doesn't care cause love and all that jazz” In which Hopper or your friends don't support your relationship with your boy. Y���all can request for a part two if you want!!!
Masterlist
Part One | Part Two
But my friends keep telling me to give it up
Hawkins High School wasn’t known for much. The demographic wasn’t too smart, they weren’t too talented in the Arts, and they certainly weren’t known for their football team (who just recently had a resurgence in interest for the first time in six years). However, the school was granted thousand and thousands of dollars for scholarships and funding for the students who were apart of the Tigers basketball team. While Steve Harrington had built the team from nothing, the newest addition gave the team a beautiful new poster boy. He was tan, tall, built, and came from sunny California— the coach told people the family moved from the Sunshine State for the team itself, but you knew through your adopted sisters good friend Max that there had been a messy divorce and that his dad and her mom wanted a new start (“As if my dad was the problem” she had said one girls night when she, Y/N, and Eleven sat in green masks in her dads cabin and watching ‘Dirty Dancing’).
So, it wasn’t too much of a surprise that there was a ‘Tigers Weekend’ where there was a pep rally for the team's tourney on Friday, followed by a city farmers market and town fair on Saturday, and a fundraising car wash on Sunday at the school. All events were run solely by the Team, the cheer squad (who were below average at best— they were all beautiful girls, just not too talented), and the student council— that’s where Y/N Hopper came in. You were the councils Secretary and was therefore encouraged (forced) to volunteer in at least one of the events over the weekend. You had known that the cheer squad would have taken care of the car wash in hopes of catching the attention of one of the Tigers themselves, so you had opted for the town fair. The president of your council had appointed you to the dart-balloon station. All you had to do was hand the participants their darts, take their tickets and hope you didn’t get a dart in the eye. It seemed like an easy job until you got there early that morning and found out that your crush, Billy Hargrove (keg king, sex god, human brass knuckle weapon, Tiger poster boy, you could go on forever) was working the dunk tank across from you.
Good grief.
“Having fun, Thumper?” Steve Harrington teased, walking up to your booth. You and Steve had grown close after the catastrophe that happened in November. You had shown up for your junior year in Hawkins and had moved in with your Dad, Jim Hopper— which then leads to your view of the world being turned upside down (ba-da-tss). Steve had decided to give you the shitty nickname one day after dropping Eleven off from lunch with The Party (“haha get it? ‘Cause your last name is Hopper, and bunnies hop and Thumper is the bunny from Bambi? No? Okay.”).
“Oh, you know me, living my best life.” You stole some of the cotton candy he was holding and promptly let it drop from your mouth into the trashcan. “How does someone mess up cotton candy?”
“It must suck to have to deal with him all day, though.” Steve glared across the way where Tommy H. had run up and pressed the button, effectively sending Billy into the cold water of the tank below.
“He may not be a good person, but he looks good doing it.” You smirked. Steve knew about your crush on the boy and had not spoken to you for four weeks after he had found out. The only reason why he had started speaking to you is because your dad had basically guaranteed a spot in the Hawkins police force on the sole condition that Steve starts talking to you again.
“You’re a dumbass, Y/N Hopper.” He said, throwing the bag of cotton candy in the trash behind the booth.
“And you're an idiot Steve Harrington.” You said, just as a ball of fire sprinted up to your booth and nearly bowled Steve over, making you burst into loud laughter. He had brought all the kids, and therefore the life into this cruddy fair.
“Can we play?” The kids yelled over each other. They gave you the tickets and you gave them the darts and pressed yourself into the far side of the booth, avoiding the wrath of the children throwing darts.
“Elle, no powers that’s cheating!” Mike yelled, budging his girlfriend with his shoulder. You shushed him and winked at your sister who was blushing profusely. Only Lucas had won anything which was a small bear (he gave it to Max who turned as red as her hair). The kids jumped away from where they were standing when there was a grumbling cough behind them. Billy. Billy Hargrove was at your booth. He was wet and at your booth and you didn’t think you would be able to breathe if he kept looking at you like that.
“Hey, Max. Who’s your friend?” He asked, not looking away from you but resting his hand heavily on her shoulder.
“Go away, Billy.” She glared. They had started becoming more civil with each other, but she was fiercely protective of The Party. It was something you admired about the young girl.
“Hey, Blue— I can handle myself.” You smiled at her, making her step away from her older brother. “I’m Y/N.” Your eyes flicked over to the boy (who was still looking at you with those blue eyes oh. my. god.) and you held out your hand for him to shake. He took your hand and raised it to his lips and kissed your fingertips. You could probably die happy. No, you could definitely die happy with the way he was peaking up at you through his thick lashes.
Good grief.
Daddy, daddy if you could only see
Just how good he's been treating me
You'd give us your blessing right now
'Cause we are in love, we are in love, so please
You and Billy had thrived from that day on. He had given you the time of day (finally), and had been obsessed with you ever since. It was your three month anniversary today, and you and he had left Hawkins and booked a roomie some cheap motel a few hours away in Chicago. You were draped in a beige sheet and nothing else while Billy was sitting against the headboard with a smoke dangling from his lips. He had no sheet covering his body and was half hard from your latest round. You were tracing patterns on his thigh and humming every soften in the warmth and contentment you felt whenever you were around him and away from the glares of your friends. Steve had been so grossly offended by the reciprocation of your feelings but had decided to give Billy the benefit of the doubt when he had gone up and formally apologized to his enemy, shaking his hand on the day of graduation and giving one nod as a goodbye.
He offered the cigarette to you and you took a drag from it. You left it in between his fingers and sucked on the filter.
“You’re so gorgeous, babe.” He groaned, resting his head on the headboard and looked down at you with a small smile on his lips. You rolled on top of him and shimmied up to straddle his lap. You kissed him lightly on the lips and trailed open mouth kisses across his cheek, over his jawline, and down his neck until you reached his collarbone where you nuzzled his way into his shoulder and breathed in his musky man smell. “You’re gorgeous and insatiable.”
“Well, you should have known this would happen when you kissed my hand that day.” You mumbled, melting into him. He sighed and ran his hand through your hair, putting the cigarette in the ashtray beside the bed.
“You smell good, you know that?” He mumbled against your lips before running his tongue over your bottom lip. You moaned lightly and gasped when he rolled you over onto your back. He trailed kisses down your chest and sucked a nipple into his mouth, biting lightly. You giggled, before tugging on his mullet and pulling him up to your lips.
“You should meet my family.” You said, voice strong and making strong eye contact.
“What?” He sat back on his heels and looked at you with a furrowed brow.
“You should meet my dad and my sister.” You pulled yourself up and crossed your legs, leaning forward. You reached and grabbed his hand, brushing your thumb over his. His skin was glowing in the yellow light of the motel room and you felt your entire body warm up. “Dad’s going to be harder to convince, but I think Elle would like you.”
“So, you think we’re serious?” He whispered. Your stomach dropped— you hadn’t expected that reaction.
“Well, I mean, you took me to Chicago and had the bed covered with rose petals. What did you think I was—“
“Baby,” He smiled. “I didn’t mean it like that. I meant it in the way that you want me in your life?”
You glanced quickly from your intertwined hands to his face and noticed that his eyes were glassier than normal. You made Billy Hargrove cry.
“You’re it for me, Bill. I know that we have only been dating three months, but you make me feel so warm. You make me better— OH.” You were knocked back by the force of him and laughed through him peppering kisses all over your face.
“I love you.” He laughed.
The one you warned me all about
The one you said I could do without
To say that dinner was awkward would be an understatement. You had met at the diner across from the station and had met around four in the lobby, hand held tightly in Billy’s. Elle and Hopper had walked in and you immediately noticed that Elevens nose was bleeding. You pulled a napkin from your pocket (you kept tissues in your pocket ever since you learned about her powers), and dabbed the blood away.
“You okay, kid?” You asked, glancing briefly up at you dad.
“She didn’t realize that the door was a pull and not a push.”
“You know your not supposed to get mad when that happens.” You scolded, ruffling her curly hair and following the waiter, boyfriend, and father in tow.
The four of you had sat and ordered your drinks and you began a conversation with Elle. Her and The Party had gone to the arcade, Elle had been a natural and Dungeons Lair, and every time they had gone she beat her previous high score. Lucas was getting more and more pissed by the day because Princess Daphne would, quote, “never be his” (Lucas had collapsed on the couch and had thrown his arm over her eyes). You were pulled out of your conversation by the silence going on with the boys.
Hopper was staring Billy down and it looked as if he was starting to sweat.
Good. Grief.
“I… I told you that he was a little hard to get through to.” You whispered, rubbing his thigh. He grunted and pushed his foot harder on the gas pedal. You got back to the cabin in silence. Billy’s knuckles were white and there was one dried tear track on his cheek. You reached over to wipe it away but he dodged your touch. You sighed and sat back, looking out your window and listening to the soft sound of Madonna on the radio.
You arrived five minutes later at the oak tree and sat in silence.
“That sucked.” You said. You heard a tiny chuckle from your boyfriend and you followed suit. The chuckles turned into giggles which turned into cackles which turned into belly laughs which ended in the silent laugh (the kind that makes you look like a seal).
“Thanks for that.” He said, wiping tears from his eyes and looking at you. “You’re so good.” He mumbled.
“Okay lover boy. I’m gonna go an face the wrath of daddy dearest.” You mumbled, leaning over the center console and kissing him hard on the mouth. You left the car and turned and waved until he was out of sight. You groaned, stomped your foot, and marched to the cabin.
Papa don't preach, I'm in trouble deep
Papa don't preach, I've been losing sleep
But I made up my mind, I'm keeping my baby, oh
I'm gonna keep my baby, mmm…
“The boy you’ve been seeing the Billy Hargrove? What was going through your mind when you even considered him to be a part of your life?” Your dad screamed from the kitchen. He had discarded his belt and threw it across the room as soon as you had walked in.
“I thought that he treated me well and that he deserved a chance.” You growled from the doorway while shucking your boots. You tore off Billy’s Tigers bomber jacket and draped it over the couch. “Who did you think it was?”
“I thought it was Steve. You know, best friend Steve? Steve who nearly worships the ground you walk on? Yeah, that Steve,” He glared and pointed a finger at you.
“Steve will never be more thinly best friend, Dad! I don’t get how you don’t understand that!” You stormed up to him and matched his angry gaze.
“He’s a bad man, Y/N. I don't get how much you don't understand that!” He retaliated, turning to pace throughout the cabin.
“Sure, he's had a shitty past, but people change dad! Two years ago you wouldn’t have even looked twice at any of those kids or Joyce! Not even me! You certainly wouldn’t have taken in Eleven or I.”
“Don't you dare bring her into this.” He growled.
“No, I have to dad! Because you two are my family! Mom doesn’t want me anymore and now you and Eleven are my family, and guess what, Dad? Billy is my family now too. He’s my future.” Your voice croaked, and you let the tears break over your lashes. “He’s gonna be around for a while. And you’re going to have to deal with that.” There was a long pause before you had watched him walk over to the fridge and grab a beer. You scoffed and climbed up the stairs to your loft room and laid on the bed Joyce had given you.
Good fucking grief.
#billy hargrove x reader#billy hargrove#billy#billy Hargrove x you#billy hargrove imagine#billy hargrove angst#billy hargrove smut#billy hargrove fluff#stranger things#stranger things 2#beyond stranger things#dustin henderson#stranger spoilers#steve Harrington#steve harrington x reader#hopper#jim hopper#jim hopper x reader#eleven#jane hopper#el hopper#mike wheeler#nancy wheeler#max mayfield
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