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oathkeeperoxas · 1 year

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Codywan rec list – fics I had open in my browser for 4+ months in 2022

Surely I’m not the only one who opens fics and then leaves them open for ungodly amounts of time before I read/comment on them... anyway I have cleared my browser out as a first act of 2023, and I am here to share with you some of the gems that I found there which deserve more appreciation 😤 please find several excellent codywan fics below!

Dream you not of broken men [38.9k] by aceofsuns

Clones are disappearing from the Imperial Army. CC-2224, haunted by the memories of the man he loved and killed, decides to investigate. Its a question of what exactly is up with the clones' medical examinations, what has happened to the missing troopers, and how CC-5052 is mixed up in all this. (Featuring Imperial Clone Commander CC-2224, Cody and Obi-Wan trying to navigate what they are to each other during the Clone Wars, and the clones doing the best they can to support each other despite everything else)

Only read this if you want to cry 👍 no but for real it messed me up in the besttttt way like oh my god this fic is so excellent in everything it sets out to do – the POV of an Imperial chipped Cody is so tense, and the flashbacks to the clone wars and codywan’s developing relationship will tear your heart out. Tragic codywan my beloved!!!!!!!!

Travelling at the Speed of Light [32.2k] by @anaclastic-azurite

Cody’s General has feelings for him. It’s not a problem. *** In which Cody spends the years of the Clone Wars dealing with things that are a problem, and then a little longer afterwards dealing with the things that are not. OR: A festering pile of loosely connected one-shots following the years of the Clone Wars, featuring (mostly) one-sided pining!Obi-Wan and Cody, who very much does not have the time to deal with his General’s shit on top of his own.

Honestly contender for favourite fic of last year, this one just has everythingggg the humour is packed in alongside the angst and the developing relationships so so well. I love slow burn codywan, and this delivered – the trust and the friendship between Cody and Obi-Wan in this feels so earned and so real, and makes the cumulation of their feelings at the end even more sweeter for it!

when our truth is burned from history [23.6k] by writerforlife

"'You are so good at protecting others, my dear, that you often forget to look after yourself.' Kenobi hesitates, then briefly, briefly enough that Cody thinks he has imagined it, squeezes Cody’s shoulder. 'I am not keen to leave you in the ice.'" Or: When a mission to a snow-and-ice-covered planet goes wrong, Cody and Obi-Wan are forced to flee across treacherous terrain with only each other for warmth. Along the way, they confront all the things they have been avoiding -- including their feelings.

Every cold weather trope you could want, plus a few more on the side! This has great prose and some juicy scenes to sink into, the hurt/comfort is exquisite and the set up for codywan and Cody’s character particularly is awesome

Good Man of War [16.2k] by @ooboowoonkoonooboo

During a medic’s first mission with the 212th, everything goes wrong. In the midst of it all, Cody deals with his growing feelings towards General Kenobi.

Very very good!! The mission here was very tense and the punches kept coming. Mind the gore/violence tags though, the author is very much not kidding about that, but I adored every OC in this fic, and loved loved loved how Cody was written in it!

The Raephens’ Gifts [8k] by @lttrsfrmlnrrgby

After the end of the Empire, after seeing the remaining clones and Jedi and a rebuilding Republic to something stable and close to real peace, Obi-Wan and Cody take some time away from their duties and take a vacation on a backwater planet in Wild Space to rest and recover. They sleep a lot, catch up on the last decade's books, go for long walks, and work to enjoy just being them, instead of Generals on whose shoulders the galaxy rests. They also make friends with some smart local birds.

A soft epilogue for my boys!!! I adore post-canon fics, and domestic established relationship, and healing and dealing with what happened in canon, and this is a fix it on top of all that deliciousness. Excellent prose and a unique set up finishes off this lovely treat.

deep in your marrow [2.7k] by @redminibike1

Huffing out a chuckle, Obi-Wan stood, moving across the small space to Cody’s cot and resting one knee on the mattress. Pressing his palms to the indented cheeks of Cody’s helmet, he sought out the catches, releasing them with a quiet hiss. “Head up,” he murmured. Obliging, Cody propped himself up on one elbow, blinking sleepily as Obi-Wan tugged the helmet up and off. “Hi,” he rasped, eyes warm and melting in the low light. Or: After a long and difficult campaign, Obi-Wan seeks out his commander. For Codywan Kiss Bingo 2022: kiss on the stomach/fingers/[redacted]/lips

Obi-Wan taking care of Cody hits soooo good, and this is a very soft get together that has lots of layers going on underneath. The contrast between how Obi-Wan deals with what he’s feeling and how Cody deals with what he’s feeling is sooooo much like oh okay I’m going to have shrimp emotions about this ship just thinking about it!

#codywan #fic recs #codywan fic recs #thank you beloved authors for my many stories i love you

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jatcv930au · 4 months

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BLACK AND THE BEANSTALK!!!

(Part 2)

Black was immediately terrified, as she heard hissing and sniffing coming closer to her hiding place and once she’s caught, she would be punished for eating their food, not only that, but also for her trespassing. She was meeting a dead end, and she got to act fast. But the poor demo ink blot is so scared for her life, she could barely move out of her hiding place. Such a coward she was, she even heard one of the dogs growled and even… talk?

“We know you’re in there, intruder. We all can smell you, so come out!!”

Black was then confused but terrified. How can a dog talk? Then, the cat was talking too.

“Relax, Fester, I’ll deal with it,” the black cat explained, “I’ll use my spells to take them out of their hiding place…”

“But Jinx-”

“No buts,” Jinx cut him, “I do smell it too, so let me do the rest. Besides, no one can’t resist my witchcraft magic, and don’t worry, they wont get away that easily.”

In doing so, Jinx, a giant witch black cat, uses her spell with ease, dragging Black outside of her hiding place. With Black being fully exposed, she did get a good close up of the animals. those animals were black, like her, head to toe, except for the little gray demon puppy and death omen dog. Two of the giant dogs looked with concern and worried, while the others looked shocked and a bit angry about her, “The little vermin” she is.

“Well, well, well,” the giant snake hissed, “ My what do we have here, fellas? A little snack thief?”

“It sorta looks like Asmodesus,” the giant crow cawed, “It looks just like us, but the problem is that it took nibbles of our food.”

“Perhaps, I could use a little snack. Feed me that creature, Jinx,” Asmodeus asked politely, “It’s time to teach this little vermin a lesson.”

“…. Okay, as you wish.” Black was panicking, she couldn’t die like this, she just wants a home and a friend, more than just a friend but a happy family. Black whined and begged to be spared, but curse her speaking, they didn’t understand her. Before Jinx was about give asmodeus his tiny snack, one of the dogs, Soul, growled and barked to stop them from eating her alive. Thanks goodness, someone finally understands her feelings. Later, they discussed and decided if they could or want to keep her. There had been some arguments, while others just watched and listened.

“I’m not so sure if we could take care of a little creature like that, Soul,” Jinx murmured to the puppy, “It’s none of our responsibility. Plus, she doesn’t even know who we are. And no, Rufus, she’s not a human, she’s different to everyone. Right, Zuzu?”

“Agreed, Jinx,” Zuzu the crow answered, “We’re not risking a tiny creature like her to stay with us.”

“But she could be Jinx and Zuzu. She’s something else that we don’t know of,” Soul counter argued, “Oh please, Jinx, she was like us. I could tell from her eyes, abandoned, hurt, hungry, poor, and had no one to care for her. Like Rufus, he joined us, because he lost a human friend.”

“… Let us talk about it privately…” The others agreed with Jinx and went to a private room, leaving small/tiny Black, giant Soul, and giant Rufus all alone in the other room together.

“Hey don’t worry, you’re not the only one who was welcomed small sized…. Me and Rufus had been there. I’m Soul, and this death omen dog is Rufus,” Soul smiled. Black was a bit scared of Rufus.

“Don’t worry, little one, Rufus like to make new friends that are smaller like you.” The death pupper barked and licked Black gently to show a warm welcome, showing a goofy smile to her. Black smiled and giggled as she felt comfort and warmth in their protection, but there was something special about the Demon puppy that made her blush. He comforted her, he understands her feelings, and make her feel like she belongs to him and Rufus, hopefully the other pets as well.

Minutes passed and the pets finally came out of the room to explain their final results to them. From the looks of their faces, it seemed agreeable to Soul’s explanation and comparison to their lives. Their result was keeping Black here and make her become a family of their own. Black and the other dogs were so happy, as celebrated with the pets to warm welcome to their new home.

“Welcome to our home, little one,” jinx politely smiled, “We’re’ sorry that we threatened you. All we need is an apology and your name, please?”

“….” But all Black could say is…

“…?” The pets were confused. Black was embarrassed and was in guilt. She can’t even speak a word that any species could understand because her species is unidentified. Then, they realized that she could still be a baby and can’t speak the language like they do, which is understandable why she can’t speak yet…

‘One day,’ she thought to herself, ‘one day…’

“Anyway, let’s find out your name and hear your apology later,” Jinx continued, “for now, we are called team… DARK PETS…..”

“Welcome to our side of the family, little one,” Fester smiled, “I hope you feel comfortable with us and be good friends with you!” ^^

Black smiled back…. ^^

TBC…..

@kaiju-wolfdragon @mimiocto @psychonauts-razigula @ask-de-writer @mean-bf777 @starlightgirl242 anyone else?

#SoundCloud #jatcv au #g/t fluff #jack and the beanstalk #oc #black #oc not mine #kaiju wolfdragon #the dark pets #Soul #inspiredrawaw #Rufus the black dog omen

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justatalkingface · 10 months

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The 'Great' MHA Read Along Gaiden, 1(?): Why in the hell I'm even doing this.

It occurs to me that people reading these posts may be wondering why in the fuck I'm doing this. Goood question! (and a perfectly understandable one at that.) And, rather than cluttering up a more 'normal' Read Along post with this, I decided to make this post, set up in a way you could only find it if you want to find it; I'm not going to force this grandstanding monologue on some poor, random sap.

So, again, why?

Well, in part? Some kind of sick curiosity, really, the same kind of curiosity that leads people to do all sorts of weird things; can I do this? What would it be like to do this? What will this become, if I do it to the very end? I wonder that, and so at least part of me wants to find out, simple as that. There's also some more honest curiosity, mixed with nostalgia, to re-read the earlier chapters again. But beyond that?

Well...

When I first started reading MHA, I fell in love: all these things I liked in a story, but it was different, new and interesting. The plot was promising, the characters were charismatic and felt real, a new and exotic take on a super powered world... I became a loyal reader from that first chapter.

Oh, the flaws were always there, of course, but some of them are problems that are there in retrospect, some of them I was just too blinded by the story to see... and some I saw, but I loved the story so much that I kept going anyways. Besides, if you stop reading something just because it has some flaws, you'll never read anything.

Still, I hoped and waited for it to improve. And I waited. And I waited. And I waited.

And I waited.

But not only did it not get better, it got worse instead, those flaws festering in the plot like infected wounds that had been left to rot. Izuku endlessly being ground in the dirt for no real reason, Bakugou being praised for treating people like shit, All Might being turned into a useless moron, Shoto's story being eaten alive by Endeavour's whitewashing, the inconsistent and often idiotic choices of villain characterization, All For One being turned into a joke... Nighteye.

And the more the story disappointed me, the more aware I became of its flaws, until we reached The War Arc, which, much like MHA itself, raised my hopes before dashing them into the ground. It was then I knew that things would never improve, and that things could only get worse from here; that arc left so many things so destroyed that there was no way for Hori to salvage them, even if he tried.

*Spoilers: he didn't!*

Still, by that point, I'd read what will probably turn out to be most of the story, and I was kind of commited; if I stopped here, it the curiosity would irk me, like an itch I couldn't scratch, until I found out, and giving up on MHA felt like giving up on all the parts I did like, all the interesting world building and characters that had ever been a part of this.

Plus, in all honesty, one chapter a week (which I've gotten far less regular about checking) isn't that big a burden, so I kept reading.

Still, as I kept going, and started looking for people who shared my opinions, and as I found fanfiction staying more and more with the troublesome portrayals canon gave us, rather than exploring what could have been, part of me was wondering: was all this there from the start? Was this ever as good as I thought it was? Or did it just get that bad over time?

And, well. I still want to know. Those questions still irk me. And, once this was brought up, the idea of it wouldn't leave me alone.

So, *shrug*, I'm finding out.

#The 'Great' MHA Read Along

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genderkoolaid · 1 year

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Honestly, I was not expecting that kind of a response, thank you. And yeah, I guess I am just kinda hurting, when I was a small little trans boy in a small little Christian town, online trans spaces were the only place I could go and so many of them were filled with transfems putting down transmascs. And I guess it’s just kinda like, after you see enough of that shit you just kinda give up on having an ally in that group. Because yeah one or two isn’t bad, but when it’s constant like it is in a lot of Reddit/twitter spaces which was where my trans ass was, seeing people saying we should all just band together and forget our differences, idk, it just kinda hits me as naive. Obviously this isn’t to put down transfems, no group is a monolith, there’s just a very vocal minority of transfems who I had my first experiences with and it was like, okay, what the fuck am I trying to do allying with these ppl. Idk, it still seems a little bit fantastical to all band together. Plus pretty much (especially white) transfem I’ve met believes they are in some way more oppressed for being trans even if they acknowledge trans men “kinda face oppression too”, idk, it just seems like lumping us all together is like putting us in a get along tshirt and not realizing that some ppl don’t want to be around ppl who have historically hurt them a lot. Idk.

It makes sense that when you hear transunity your first thought is of the people who have hurt you the most, and that must have been traumatizing. The online community in general tends to emphasize the most divisive opinions & also tends to be dominated by the more privileged and sheltered people in the community, which is why many people find that people they meet in physical spaces tend to have much more diverse and open opinions. When that's the dominant way you experience the community, it definitely leaves you feeling like community is doomed to fail. This (both intra-community violence in general and transandrophobia specifically) has been allowed to fester in trans spaces for far too long. I get how while you logically know its a small minority your view of trans solidarity has been stained by that & that can be really hard to change, especially when that kind of thing is still a problem in the community.

If you want my opinion: taking care of your own mental health, especially as it relates to gender, and exposing yourself to transfems & other trans people who are openly supportive of transmasc activism, is vital. Running this blog I've found a lot of transfems who support the conversation around transandrophobia, including people who are extremely supportive and vocal about it. When you see people like that more and more, you start to focus on the ways we can help each other more than the ways we harm each other. I see other trans people talking about transandrophobia and transunity and it affirms to me how they are people who take this seriously and want to build a safer community for everyone. cipheramnesia is a pretty big transfem blogger who's been vocally supportive of transmasc activism discussing transandrophobia, and the reason I got into this discussion in the first place was through seeing a trans woman talk about it and insist that it wasn't inherently transmisogynistic and that transmascs do deserve to be heard about the details of our oppression. I may have never made this blog at all if it weren't for transfems being vocal allies of transmasc activism.

I've also seen a lot of trans people with awful, divisive, and bigoted takes; I know those come from people who are also hurting, who are lashing out at people they have biases against because it lets them feel some kind of control and release. Its tempting to step back and leave the whole thing behind- and if that's what you need to do for your mental health and safety, that is your right. But to me, the hardest and most important thing about activism is acknowledging how real change has to come from opening up and making connections and risking pain and rejection for the sake of transformation.

Transunity is, fundamentally, about taking that risk because we know its the only way we can unwork the thing that keeps all of us oppressed, the only thing that truly and consistently benefits from the infighting. Transunity is a direct response to the behavior you describe, created by trans people from multiple different groups. Its still very, very young as a movement but the more it grows, hopefully, the more people who will be vocal about the issues in our community and how open discussion and active solidarity are vital to our liberation. There may always be discourse and assholes lashing out, but there will also always be people putting in the work and showing compassion, so those people will find each other and work for the betterment of everyone, including those trying to tear each other apart.

Like I said, its also important to take care of your mental health. Alienation from your community is traumatizing (as plenty of aspec people can tell you), and that leaves you with defense mechanisms meant to keep you safe that can be hard to get rid of. I think transmasc-focused spaces can be really, really helpful in healing that kind of trauma and help you feel much more stable and supported in your transness & as a person, which in turn makes you more willing to take that risk and open up for a chance at solidarity and community. A lot of times, you need to take care of yourself and get in a good place before you can really engage in community activism, so I don't blame you at all for being wary of transunity when you are obviously still hurting. Healing is fucked up and messy and its alright to have complex emotions about people and things while you are dealing with that pain. Like I said, at the end of the day I wish you the best, and I hope you find yourself a community that supports you like you deserve.

#m.#ask box #transunity

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goldenimpact · 3 years

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A compilation of all the Xiaoaether AUs I have right now! (plus the original pair, but I guess shipping them in of itself is like an AU?)

(under the cut: about the AUs!)

Roleswap

Aether and Xiao switch roles, so it’s Adeptus Aether and Traveler Xiao! Other characters have also switched roles, though this might be a matter of your own preference on who is who!

Xiao: An otherworldly traveler on a mission to subdue the darkness that builds up in various worlds. He arrives to fight just as suddenly as he departs, leaving no one his name or his purpose for being there. Since landing in Teyvat, he’s found himself getting attached to a certain stubborn yaksha...

But that’s only because they’re usually in the same place anyways because their job descriptions are pretty similar and as soon as he takes his eyes off of Aether, that guy is running off to help some random person with their groceries or something so he has to watch over him—

(Secretly, he likes the company. Aether is a literal ball of sunshine and Xiao is very, very fond of him. Enough to want to whisk him away with him once he has to leave this world, but he can’t just do that, Aether’s bound to the world, to his homeland, but... but...)

Aether: The last yaksha, born from the light of a fallen star. As a being practically made of light, his duty is to purify the karma left festering from old gods in the lands of Liyue. As the centuries go on, the evils of the past slowly start to fade, so recently he’s been worried about what will happen to him once his job is finished. After all, he cannot be “light” if there is no “darkness”... But disappearing would mean he’s done what he was meant to do, right? Isn’t that a happy thing?

As of late, he’s found himself charmed by a passing traveler. The guy just exudes darkness, so Aether wants to stick around to help him out! But then he falls in love with him. Luckily, it seems like Aether’s contract with the Geo Archon ended just now, so there’s no problem if he follows the guy around Teyvat, right? And wherever beyond! Once his end comes, and he meets his sister up in the stars, he’ll be sure to bring her a ton of stories of him and his grumpy traveler!

Mermaid (Version A)

Merman Aether and Researcher Xiao, where Aether lives in an exhibit in an aquarium in Liyue that Xiao works at. Xiao’s coworkers include Zhongli, his boss, and Ganyu, his junior. A very, very peaceful and happy world setting!

Aether: An innocent, if sheltered merman who fell in love with a human and let said human take him onto land. While he can understand human language, he’s still learning how to speak it. Otherwise, he does chirping noises, trills, purring, etc. “Xiao” is his first and favorite word! He’s very affectionate and loves hugs, though kisses are reserved for his human! Despite the language barrier, he gets along splendidly with anyone he meets.

His latest worry is trying to perfect his human form and the human language. Although, Xiao did say it was fine if he never learned how to hide all his fins and gills, but!!! Aether wants to go outside with Xiao! And also see Xiao’s home! And talk with Xiao a whole lot!

Xiao: The human who stole Aether away from the ocean, because he wanted to study him. (That’s a lie, he just wanted to take Aether home but he didn’t have a suitable place for Aether in his house, so he took him to his workplace instead...) He was the one who taught Aether how to kiss and definitely cried when Aether first said his name. Used to be known as a rather cold person, but ever since Aether came, people have realized he’s just a hot mess that’s really into that merman he brought back. The amount of PDA is ridiculous.

He does want to get along with Aether’s sister, although right now they’re in a standoff... Ah, but his biggest worry right now is that Aether is getting exponentially cuter with every day.

Phantom of the Opera

Featuring literal shadow creature Phantom Xiao and his angelic muse, Aether. Who is trying to take Aether away from the opera house? Lumine, probably, but your favorite love triangle rival can fill this role too!

Aether: A boy who loves watching opera performances and wanted to work with them up close as backstage staff. As the newbie, he got saddled with nighttime cleaning duty, a time when the legendary Phantom is said to roam. Despite that, Aether spends his nights re-enacting that day’s performance all by himself on the stage for fun, initially unaware of his single audience member…

He befriends the local shadow creature (Xiao) very easily and likes singing for him. Xiao starts bringing him outfits, so he puts them on and spins around for his friend happily, and this goes on for a while and before Aether knows it, he’s the star of the opera house? Well… performing is fun, and Xiao seems really happy these days, so it’s fine!

Xiao: Initially, he was a being made entirely of darkness. He spent his time skulking around the opera house as its shadows for years, since he likes music, in exchange for protecting the town. His favorite performer is that blonde boy who twirls around and laughs cutely all by himself on that big stage at night. Enjoying the sight, yet also yearning to give the boy company, Xiao attempts to make himself a human shape so he can talk to Aether. It ends up failing, as his human shape is still unstable and he exposes his true form to Aether, but Aether accepts him regardless.

Thinking of the fancy garments other performers wear at the opera house, Xiao digs up some old clothes and helps Aether touch them up, all just to watch Aether twinkle under the lights… If Xiao defends Aether from the other workers who think him a thief or for aiming for the stage despite being backstage staff, ultimately ending up with Aether as the opera house’s star, well… Aether really deserves the spot. The opera house was originally built as an offering to Xiao anyways, so what’s wrong with doing as he likes?

Evil Spirits

First childhood sweethearts, then fellow evil spirits, this story features Cursed Doll Spirit Aether and Evil Spirit Xiao! They are, without a doubt, villains. That doesn’t stop them from being affectionate with each other, though!

Aether: Xiao’s childhood friend who moved away when they were still young. They made a promise to be together, something both parties still hold onto, even in death. Aether, due to terrible cult reasons or gruesome experimentation or both!, dies young and is made into a doll. His lingering regrets and intense emotions at the time of his death allow his consciousness to remain in the doll, though he needs to feed off human fear/lives to survive. Eventually picked up by Xiao, the two of them make for a rather frightening pair. Although it saddens Aether to watch Xiao become more and more unhinged, he’s happy that they’re together now.

Aether can’t stand up for long on his own, as he’s not built for that, so he either needs to have some sort of support or just has to be carried around. It frustrates him greatly, but Xiao seems pretty content to carry him… While Aether can speak, his mouth doesn’t move at all, since it’s just painted on, so he has a permanent smile, even when upset. His abilities involve drawing people and spirits alike to him, as well as assisting those who passed in rather… violent ways to become evil spirits.

Xiao: Aether’s childhood friend who searched for him when Aether disappeared. Eventually discovering Aether as a doll, as well as everything that led up to this, Xiao vows to eradicate every single person involved. He gets through a decent portion up until adulthood, carrying Aether along with him all the while, but is eventually killed in action. Aether uses his own powers to bring Xiao back as a spirit, allowing Xiao to continue his quest to slaughter. As Aether creates more and more evil spirits, Xiao begins to turn his attention to exorcists and the like who come to vanquish them… They promised to be together, after all. It doesn’t matter if it is as humans or ghosts. He won’t let anyone separate them again.

Rather than having abilities, Xiao is just really good at murder. Add on his now supernatural disposition, he’s only gotten stronger since his death. He’s single-minded in how he dotes on Aether, almost like he’s trying to make up for all the potential years Aether lost to physically grow up. The two of them are wandering spirits, leaving a trail of evil ghosts everywhere they go.

Mermaid (Version X)

Merman Xiao and Researcher Aether, where Xiao resides in a research facility in Mondstadt that Aether recently started working at. Aether’s coworkers include Albedo, who recommended him for the job in the first place, and Sucrose, who studies under Albedo.

Aether: He got the job through his friend Albedo, because Aether can “get along with anyone and anything” and “is disarmingly charming, in a good way”, apparently. The purpose of Aether’s supposed charms was to attempt to communicate and get along with the facility’s resident merman, who is notorious for being unsociable. And difficult. And kind of moody. But he’s also ridiculously pretty, Aether notices… in a scientific way, of course!

Courtesy of Aether’s (blatant crush) job description of looking after Xiao, eventually the two become close! Very close. A little too close. Since Xiao is set on Aether being his mate, he doesn’t like it when Aether is gone for very long. So more often than not, Aether stays overnight at the facility… It’s gotten to the point that Lumine has been asking him when he’ll introduce his boyfriend to her, but Xiao is, uh, a bit difficult to introduce… in a lot of ways…

Xiao: A merman who has been around a lot longer than he seems. He used to live in the deep, dark depths of the sea, but for some reason has allowed humans to conduct their research on him. Irritable yet reasonable, Xiao understands human language, though he doesn’t bother speaking it. Growls and the sound of his teeth and fins are good enough indicators of his mood. He finds all the employees suspicious, especially the new one with really, really bright eyes. (Did they send this one in specifically to enchant him..? Because he really can’t take his gaze off this one…)

After being subject to Aether’s (blatant crush) insistent nature for a couple weeks, Xiao eventually and abruptly deems Aether his mate. With that sudden declaration out of the way, he’s in his best mood when Aether is doting on him (or vice versa!) and no one else is around. Given his current environment, he’s a bit lost on how to properly prove himself a good mate to Aether, so he settles for being rather… clingy. And protective. Albedo has nearly lost his hands to Xiao’s teeth many times now.

Personality Swap

Not a complete personality swap, more of a “the general feel of the character” swap, but that’s not a very catchy AU title, you know? Using the Red Xiao design for a cheerier Xiao and a Lumine-based design for a colder Aether, this AU is otherwise close to canon!

Aether: An otherworldly traveler looking for his twin older sister. Not very expressive and doesn’t like speaking if it isn’t necessary, he’s a rather spacey-looking boy. Even still, he enjoys helping people, though he wanders off as soon as the job’s done, mind already drifting elsewhere. The adeptus that found him is kind of noisy, he thinks, but it’s a nice kind of noise.

Xiao is in the habit of giving Aether gifts and affection, both verbal and physical, which has led Aether to being faintly aware that perhaps, he’s being courted..? Unsure of how to return Xiao’s pursuits, Aether usually mimics the things Xiao does to him, like holding hands or gifting items. Aether always wears the flowers Xiao gifts him. And since he’s gotten so used to Xiao touching him in some way at all times, when Xiao isn’t, he starts to get fidgety…

Xiao: One of the yaksha tasked to protect Liyue, who first discovered the traveler in Liyue and proceeded to accompany him all over Teyvat. Cheery and sociable, and also Aether’s sole travel companion, Xiao does all the talking for their party of two. He worried about that traveler to the point of following him around everywhere and falling head over heels, so his fellow yakshas and adepti practically kicked him out of Liyue to go ask Aether out.

Now out of a job and hopelessly in love, Xiao is helping Aether through Teyvat while trying to court him at the same time. He’s honestly not sure if his approach is working, but Aether has started speaking to him in a quiet voice lately, with soft, breathy laughs and tiny smiles that make Xiao’s heart explode into a million bits, so..!!! Even if they don’t end up together romantically, being someone Aether trusts to laugh with is already—!! (Insert Xiao’s mental keysmash here)

Casino

A successful and busy casino with a long history, run by the characters of Liyue and the traveler twins! This AU has Waiter (Waitress??) Aether in a bunny-girl outfit and Dealer Xiao, who also doubles as a bouncer. Lumine has also appeared as a waitress!

Aether: One of the wait staff working at the casino, alongside his twin sister. He’s the only wait staff wearing a skirt, since according to his sister, “no one will survive” if he doesn’t. Additionally, Aether’s the most popular of the bunny wait staff, for his good looks and charming demeanor. It’s a title he works hard to uphold, even if he’s not entirely sure how it happened.

When he first started working at the casino, he was under Xiao’s tutoring, so he has experience being a dealer/bouncer. Him primarily becoming part of the wait staff was because the casino had no lack of mischievous tricksters and stone-faced bouncers among their dealers… Having someone as cute as Aether serving you drinks is guaranteed to lift your spirits!

Xiao: A dealer/bouncer who has been working at the casino for a long time. Initially only a bouncer, becoming a dealer alongside that was a more recent endeavor, as it was suggested to him by his superior, Zhongli. He now misuses his work experience to simultaneously deal cards while also keeping an eye on Aether… or more accurately, anyone trying to get handsy with Aether. The incidents where Xiao did have to intervene are a well-known story, so all who have been in the casino for a couple hours know better than to try anything…

He’s one of the aforementioned “stone-faced bouncers” within the dealers and will undoubtedly catch you if you try to cheat. When Aether comes by to deliver drinks or the like, Xiao noticeably softens… On the other hand, on those rare days where Aether is working as a dealer and Xiao is a waiter, Xiao will slam drinks on the table as a warning. Don’t try anything with Aether. Aether always laughs when it happens.

Horror

With horror game series like Fatal Frame and Clocktower and all the like of that aesthetic as reference, this is essentially a horror-game-esque AU! Since the other horror-like AU had them as antagonists, this is the one where they’re the protagonists! And there’s nothing more terrifying than being children in a supernaturally horrific bad spot.

Aether: While playing hide-and-seek with his sister in their grandparents’ house, he ends up stumbling on a strange mirror in an old room. Predictably enough, he’s dragged into the world of the mirror, the realm of the dead, and has to find his way out. When he finds out his sister is somewhere in here too, he changes his goal to escaping along with her, once he finds her!

As most old horror game heroines are, Aether is all puzzle-solving and endless kindness, if frequently panicked. He relies on Xiao for a more aggressive approach to situations, though he does his best to negotiate where he can. The two of them get along so well you would think they’ve known each other all their lives.. Maybe even multiple lives!

Xiao: A boy that Aether encounters while trapped in the mirror, who promises to get Aether out. He’s rather tight-lipped about himself, whether it’s about why he’s here or his reasons for helping. Aether’s trust in him despite this mystifies him (and also makes him a bit happy), even if it is a bad idea in general. While he’s fine with assisting Aether, he doesn’t seem too enthused at the idea of finding Aether’s sister… In fact, he seems hostile?

As Aether’s partner, he makes up for what Aether lacks, so he’s all the combative force between the two. Additionally, he’s strangely quick and is able to play as a distraction while Aether solves puzzles. However, he’s vastly less merciful than Aether, which means his immediate response is usually to finish off an enemy. This leads to the two sometimes arguing on what to do (Aether wins a majority of the time).

Mutual Sickness

Read the blog description for the disclaimer! It’s the local specialty: a weirdly wholesome(?) yandere AU. A modern setting where Aether and Xiao are mutually pining in a very strange way, yet still aren’t going out. Not for a lack of wanting to, of course! More of a misunderstanding sort of romantic comedy, with a yandere twist.

Aether: Not the murderous sort, as he prefers collecting Xiao’s discarded or forgotten items, or taking photos throughout the day. He’s working hard to be Xiao’s ideal type in every way (which is just Aether), including making almond tofu exactly the way Xiao likes it (unaware that it’s Xiao’s favorite simply because Aether made it especially for him). Aether deals with his rivals by indirectly proving himself the best match for Xiao (and sometimes directly, by showing off how he’s basically the only person who can get away with all the stuff he bothers Xiao for).

One day, Aether follows Xiao on his way home and witnesses him absolutely pummeling some guy that Aether vaguely recalls had confessed to him earlier that day (Aether turned him down immediately, so he forgot about it). Not an unusual thing to see for Aether, since he stalks Xiao, but this time he gets caught watching. Before he knows it, he’s trapped against the wall and Xiao’s giving him the most threatening confession Aether’s ever heard and wow… How could he say anything other than yes?

Xiao: Unfortunately, he doesn’t have a lot of time to follow Aether around everywhere (a decent portion of the day, but not every minute, which he would prefer...), but with Aether being so popular, he gets the information he needs without even stalking him (which is great, yet it also pisses him off to have to hear it secondhand). Although he still takes pictures when he can, often enough, Aether’s included in pictures his friends post on social media, so he saves those too… and edits everyone else out. Xiao deals with rivals violently, if verbal threats aren't enough to scare them off. People thought the two were dating even before they actually were, since neither of them denied rumors. Xiao’s felt like they were an item anyways, since Aether doesn’t smile like that for anyone else… (And well.. he was right.)

After hearing about the latest confession Aether received (and feeling a vicious satisfaction that Aether, again, turned the guy down), Xiao commences his usual routine of teaching a lesson to idiots who can’t take a hint (read: various verbal-bordering-physical warnings to back off) and try their luck at confessing. Once he finishes up and turns to leave, he locks eyes with Aether, and panics. Thinking it’s do-or-die, he pushes Aether against a wall and spills everything to him (his feelings, his sins, his desires and dark, dark thoughts, etc). If he ended up getting arrested, at least it would be Aether’s decision… And yet, to his surprise (and utterly baffled delight), Aether grins and wraps his arms around him, and oh, it was mutual all this time… Of course it was, why was he even worried?

Royalty

Probably the most nonsensical of the AU bundle, this is an AU featuring a Royal Aether, who is usually in pretty dresses and his loyal, if foul-mouthed, Guard Xiao. Story and world-building is still pending, but the askbox is always open for suggestions! Even if it’s just scenarios you want to see with this pair!

Aether: Formally referred to as “Princess”, which is his work title, and has nothing to do with him being male. Unlike his sister, who has the title and duties of “Prince” so she is frequently away on journeys, Aether’s duties have him remain in the kingdom to watch over it. He’s also a very popular marriage candidate, with many after his hand, but for some reason seems rather uninterested? Maybe his heart is already set on someone…

As all royalty are trained in combat, Aether is no different, though there isn’t much chance to use it when Xiao’s there. Xiao serves as his bodyguard, attendant, and confidant, so they’re together nearly 24/7. Aether worries that Xiao is working too much and has, on multiple occasions, tried to convince Xiao to let other servants help out, only to be shot down every time. It’s an ongoing discussion… that has been going on for years.

Xiao: Aether’s personal guard/attendant/closest confidant who has been by Aether’s side since childhood. Originally brought in to be the twins’ sparring partner, he became good friends with Aether and wanted to support him as they grew up. So, he intentionally chose a career path that would let him stay close to Aether. Because of that, he doesn’t ever think he’s overworking, but he does often complain that taking care of Aether on his own is a load of work (a load he’ll gladly carry for the rest of his life, he muses to himself, when he combs his fingers through Aether’s hair and watches him yawn in the mirror. Cute.)

Xiao finds everyone aiming for Aether’s hand to be.. unworthy. Yet, if you inquired just what sort of person would be worthy, Xiao would open his mouth, pause, then shut it closed. Truthfully, it would just have to be someone Aether loves, who loves Aether in return, and that’s it, but… Xiao is aware that he also technically fits that criteria. They’re already close enough as it is, but to be able to hold Aether, to kiss him, to… It’s not like there’s any restrictions stopping him, he just needs a little push. (Here, we insert the story drama when we make it! Maybe it’ll be a soap opera, maybe it’ll be a fighting tournament, who knows!)

Beauty and the Beast

More based on the wiki page for the original story than the Disney version, it’s the story for Beauty and the Beast! For this AU, it’s Aether the Beauty and Xiao the Beast. Other notable characters include Childe (referred to as Ajax here) and Lumine, also Zhongli is here somewhere…

Aether: The second eldest of his family, a group of orphans, who looks after the younger ones when Ajax, the eldest, is out for work. When Ajax asked everyone what kind of souvenirs they wanted him to bring back, Aether requested a flower unique to whatever country (Liyue, in this case) he was going to this time. Ajax, someone who always keeps his promises, is troubled initially since most flowers in Liyue can be found in other countries too. Then, he finds out about a flower that only grows on a certain mountain in Liyue, and attempts to get one. He succeeds, but only after making a deal to the beast living there to bring back the one who wanted the flower. (Read: Ajax picked a fight and lost. Ajax will remember this. Especially because he has to leave his little brother to this… thing.)

Aether, as promised, arrives at the beast’s home and here comes the slow burn (read: pining loudly in all forms except in a direct verbal manner to each other). Aether becomes Xiao’s companion (in a pure sense) and befriends him! Though after spending all this time away from home, Aether worries how his family is doing, and gets permission from Xiao to go for a visit if he promises to come back within the month. But once Aether returns, Ajax is hellbent on defeating Xiao (partially because he loves fighting, mostly because he’s aware he’s marrying Aether off to some beast in Liyue and that’s Not Okay With Big Brother Ajax) and Lumine is trying to convince Aether to not go back…

Xiao: The beast that lives in the very specific mountain where the very specific flowers bloom. He’s some sort of mythical creature that serves some sort of deity, but his bloody work had him thinking himself ugly of heart. Knowing that words wouldn’t convey otherwise, Zhongli, the aforementioned deity, made him as horrid in appearance as he felt he was in heart. “One day, should another come to love the you shaped by your own loathing,” Zhongli told Xiao, “You will learn to love yourself as well, and your form will change with your heart.” Leaving unique flowers to lure such a person, Zhongli left Xiao to mope.

Someone who wants these flowers will fulfill the requirements left by his deity. With that in mind, Xiao refused to let Ajax leave alive until he promised to bring that person. Soon after, Aether arrived at his home, and for the first time, he welcomed another into his heart. And when Aether went to visit his family, he kept thinking and thinking about what Aether was doing, when he would return, what they should do when he was back… Maybe, when Aether returned, Xiao could tell Aether how much he means to him. Aether would appreciate that, wouldn’t he?

#xiaother #xiaoaether #xiao x aether #魈空 #xiao #aether #it's done. finally. needed to write this all down so i could stop thinking bout it...#yeah you can send an ask if you got questions bout an AU! or wanna see a specific pair do things. that's also cool #mod has written too much and now brain is fried. returning to caveman roots........#o yeah. gotta make a twitter post too. some folks were curious bout the AUs..#what do you mean most of my AUs are just the same tropes in different settings how dare you slander me #well. it's true though. i'm a creature of habit #when mod becomes poetic in writing mod has entered fever dream state...#let mod hear your thoughts bout the AUs folks.. i like hearing what y'all think... anyways... i'll make a tweet then rest a while........#y'all who sent asks... saw them... thanks for sending them in! i'll get to answering them when i have energy. and working hand #your asks and comments are fueling me.. even if it's just y'all screaming about the latest posts or ur xiaoaether thoughts

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my-mt-heart · 2 years

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TWD 11x10 “New Haunts” Review

Well, that’s funny. This episode tried to throw Donnie and Carzekiel in my face and yet somehow I still feel…secure about Caryl’s future? Does that sound backwards? Am I delusional or could it be I’ve put my faith in the right showrunner’s hands? Hmm. But in all seriousness, babes, Angela comes through once again, knowing exactly where to draw the line to preserve our understanding of Daryl’s and Carol’s characters. With that said though, I do have one bone to pick…

And here it is. I have always commended Angela for allowing the emotions to drive the story, but when it comes to this fast transition into the Commonwealth and 30-day time jump, I worry she’s fallen a little short. We know characters are being given a lot of choices this season, the choice to either stay in Alexandria or join a new, high-functioning society is a major one I’d say. To me, it just seems like all of the characters, especially the ones who took the latter option, are being thrown into this situation for the sake of honoring a predetermined plotpoint without giving enough thought into motives. What could Lance Hornsby have possibly said to convince two suspicious characters like Daryl and Carol to leave their home behind, the home Daryl not too long ago suggested was worth fighting for even if it needs to be cleaned up and the one Carol was doing everything she could to keep standing, including slaughtering a horse? Don’t get me wrong, I can formulate a few ideas. After the whirlwind Daryl experienced with the Reapers for example, he’s probably so exhausted from day-to-day survival and of course, he wants to do what’s best for Judith and RJ. As for Carol, with everything she’s suffered and endured, it’s not a stretch of the imagination to believe safety and security would be enticing to her. Maybe she wanted to remain close to Daryl. After all, the work we saw her put in throughout 11A had been for his sake in a lot of ways, hadn’t it? Plus, like, she loves him and what not. That’s the thing. I can infer all day and night, but I shouldn’t have to. For a leap this big, I think we were at least entitled to a conversation between Daryl and Carol beforehand to gauge where their heads are at, including with each other coming off a season and a half of tension.

A reviewer said Daryl and Carol seem to be on “much better” terms in this episode, and I could not disagree more. They’re friendly with each other. Carol gives Daryl a cookie. Daryl gives Carol a smug, but cute look when he finds out she used to read a lot of tabloids (side note: of course she did). Otherwise, they’re still a little bit stiff. Daryl giving the cookie to RJ reminds me of Diverged when Carol offers her canteen and he gives the water to Dog instead. It’s not meant as a rejection, but perhaps Carol sees it that way. She’s trying to take care of him, and he’s implying he doesn’t need her. Then on Daryl’s side, he’s hearing her say “maybe we don’t need to do anything to make it work” in reference to the Commonwealth, but he could easily attribute that kind of nonchalant attitude to their relationship. This is the problem with letting too many feelings go unspoken. They’re just sitting there, festering, and I predict it’s only a matter of time before it all boils over again.

I’m sure some are still disappointed Carol is living separately from Daryl and the kids (I blame fanfiction), but the way I see it, she is trying to establish boundaries. She is intentionally keeping herself at arm’s length because she can’t entertain the idea of a nuclear family again. After Henry, she doesn’t trust herself to be a maternal figure to Judith and RJ, and more than that, she wants to give Daryl space to find the happiness she’s certain she can’t give him. This, my friends, is where Connie factors in.

First, let me put it out there that there is nothing explicitly romantic between Daryl and Connie throughout the entire conversation. In fact, it seems more focused on bolstering Connie’s image, emphasizing what an accomplished journalist she is for having gotten Pamela Milton’s uncle kicked out of congress way back when. Carol even gives Daryl an impressed look as if she’s trying to communicate, “hey, did you hear that? Isn’t she great? She’s great, right?” Yes, Daryl does watch Connie go and there is definitely intent to make us think he might be attracted to her, but again, it’s worth noting there’s nothing in his expression that indicates he really is. There’s no score or anything to heighten what one would expect to be an emotional milestone for Daryl’s character because the goal is to make that dynamic as innocent or unemotional as possible. I have no doubt people who ship Daryl and Connie would laugh at that and say we’re in denial. Here’s the other thing. If the show wants to reveal Daryl has feelings for Connie, why not give them a private moment? Why not at the ball where Connie, dressed very cutely, can actually give him something to stare at? The reason, I believe, is because Carol has to be able to witness everything. She is the reason this concept of Daryl and Connie is being perpetuated. Curious that Daryl’s look comes after Carol tries to point out how impressive Connie is, as if he’s trying really hard to see what Carol sees. At the same time, unbeknown to her, Carol is the thing standing in the way of it actually happening.

She might sound amused when she says, “you should ask her to dance,” and honestly, it doesn’t surprise me. As long as she assumes Daryl is better off with Connie, she's not going to let her own deeper feelings surface or even entertain the fact that there are deeper feelings. As I said in my last review, she cares far more about making sure Daryl is happy than letting herself be happy, and I think that's because she's still harboring a lot of negative feelings about herself and her worth. At one point, she even jokes to Ezekiel that she is “a lady of high caliber” to which he replies “the highest.” The look on her face afterward is heartbreaking because it’s obvious she doesn’t really believe it, so why would a good judge of character like Daryl ever believe it? Objectively, Carol is an integral part of Daryl's happiness, but internally, she believes she's a walking virus who’s only good at spreading pain, so she is using Connie as a buffer. She needs an excuse to distance herself because if she does the opposite and gets too close, she might lose Daryl. Chase him away, get him killed. Whatever form that takes, it's Carol's biggest fear. The mind is a powerful thing, and hers is definitely playing tricks on her.

When Bonds first aired, Angela Kang commented that Carol prodding Daryl on his love life stemmed from the belief she wouldn’t make it out of the whisperer war. And I know what you’re all thinking. Well, fuck. The whisperer war is over, Carol lived through it, she made amends, and she still hates herself enough to push another woman onto Daryl? What gives? I think I’ve said before that when Daryl’s and Connie’s relationship inevitably came up again, there would have to be some sort of nuance to reflect Carol’s emotional growth since S10. Well, as I’m slowly coming to terms with, this show loves (LOVES) to bury the lead, and for that reason alone, it’s highly possible nothing is going to be clear until either Carol or Daryl confesses or they kiss or both. I’m not saying I like it. I’m just saying we should brace ourselves for it. I still maintain that Daryl will be the one to confess first, officially shutting down the notion of a romantic relationship between him and Connie and ultimately shocking not only Carol, but the fans (the ones who don’t pay attention anyway). See what I mean about a bait and switch?

All that being said, I think Carol’s apparent supportiveness can still be explained narratively. When you look closely at what she’s actually accomplished this past season – getting the horses, feeding her people, finding Connie – you might notice that it was all done in the spirit of “fixing what she broke” for the sake of the people she cares about. She did not “fix” herself. If anything, the events that transpired since the conversation in 10x06 have probably reinforced in Carol’s mind that this isn’t possible. She can’t go back and change what she’s done. Everything is a part of her, latched onto her soul. Yes, she’s accepted she can live, but in a lot of ways, she is only living on the sidelines where she watches and waits until someone needs her. Well, if Daryl’s handling himself just fine, how can she be useful? This brings us to…Ezekiel.

I’m going to throw out two facts that I dare anybody to challenge. Fact number one, Carol cares about Ezekiel. They were married for six years and had a child together. Come at me. Fact number two, Carol knows Ezekiel has cancer. So if I’m doing the math right, it stands to reason Carol would want to do anything she can to help her friend (her words, not mine), and in Carol’s mind, she’s not doing everything she can if she doesn’t sneak out of the city in an unexplainable way, steal fancy wine, and use it try to manipulate Lance Hornsby, someone with authority, into bumping Zeke up on the list so he can get the surgery he needs to, you know, live. It doesn’t have to mean she’s still in love with him or that a reconciliation is on the horizon, though I don’t think Angela minds one bit if anyone thinks that. What would lead anyone to think that based on this episode alone, I’m not sure. All throughout, Zeke is very focused on “finding reasons to smile” despite knowing he’s dying and as part of the acceptance phase, he’s starting to get his affairs in order. In a very cute scene, where Jerry and his family are dressed up as tigers in honor of Shiva, Zeke lets Jerry’s son have Shiva’s collar, which Jerry apparently recovered from Hilltop after it burnt down (Aww!!!) Then when Ezekiel visits Carol at her apartment, he gives her Henry’s box, implying that he’s ready to move on from the life the three of them had together. Carol leans back against his arm, but no, there is no snuggling. I very much see two people who have a history ready to try to build something positive and healthy with each other while they still can.

It’s very interesting that Daryl’s and Carol’s relationships with other characters are being paralleled in the same episode. I know some find it frustrating that Connie and Ezekiel are being used at all to propel Caryl forward. That frustration is totally valid. I too wish we could just focus on Daryl’s and Carol’s interactions with each other in the little time we have left. But as I’ve said many times, while it’s one thing to show Daryl and Carol belong together; it is far more powerful to convey that by first showing why they can’t belong with anyone else. Again, “choices” is the big theme of the season. Connie and Ezekiel both represent choices that Daryl and Carol have, potentially very good choices. They may even get to a point where it seems impossible not to choose them, but ultimately, I think the goal is to try to subvert our expectations (well, not our expectations). When the time comes, Daryl and Carol will choose each other. First though, they have to realize they do represent a choice in each other’s eyes. Not just a choice, but their first choice.

Even though I’m a firm advocate in continuity and they have to tie up this thread between Daryl and Connie they started in S10, it does bother me a little bit that her character has to use Daryl (and Carol) as a crutch. I’m hoping her role as an investigative reporter will allow her to stand on her own more. I suspect she’ll be vital in exposing the city’s corruption, starting with interviewing former trooper Tyler Davis. Ideally, my girl, Kelly, can also play an active role and not simply become Connie’s shadow again. Wishful thinking maybe.

While the slingshot sisters, Yumiko, and a begrudging Tomi (who works at the hospital now?) seem to all be thriving at the Commonwealth, it’s hinted that some characters are not. Magna is back to being a waitress for example, and she seems fully conscious of the class divide. Meanwhile, Daryl and Rosita are barely scraping by as military trainees. I don’t think it’s random at all that this is the path Daryl is being placed on when you consider the fact that Merle had been in the army at some point too, presumably because he was deemed a redneck lowlife with no other options. The only difference is, Daryl also has Judith, RJ, and Dog to look after. Living in a ratty apartment where crying babies and loud music are on blast couldn’t have ever been easy for Daryl, but when a little girl is asking for an allowance so she can buy records (from Princess’s store!), that must add a lot of pressure. It seems Daryl had been under the impression that “it’s not forever” and there was no reason to try to become “a team player” as Mercer puts it to him during training, but with both Judith and RJ expressing their desire to stay as long as their mom can find them, he realizes he has to step up. Even if it means kissing up to an egotistical prick like Sebastian (seriously, can this guy be more of a trope?) I imagine it’s only going to get harder for Daryl to maintain the illusion which, if he hasn’t started to already, should get him thinking about what he really wants in life. Here’s a hint: vroom, vroom.

Carol’s scene with Ezekiel also heavily suggested that she, too, feels like a fish out of water if only because she’s constantly surrounded by families and happiness she assumes she can’t have. There’s also an interesting parallel to be made when we see Carol standing outside the masquerade ball while Daryl is inside doing his best to blend in. It’s like a reverse of S5 when Carol was the one attending the party and Daryl was hovering on the outskirts. While Aaron became a mentor for Daryl, it seems like Lance is going to be taking Carol under his wing in the episodes to come. In another parallel that may not be intentional, Carol tells Lance her mother always taught her to be observant, which reminds me of Daryl back in season two when he said he was observant.

I liked some of the other dynamics we got to see, both new and old. Mercer and Princess are cute, and it’s nice to see Daryl and Rosita working closely together, trying to have each other’s backs. I’m going to come out and say it though. I don’t particularly care for this episode. It just feels offbeat. That entire sequence of Daryl catching Davis even felt like a procedural crime drama. Agent Dixon is on the move! The peculiar tone is probably intentional to a degree, but I do hope future episodes will ground us back in the world that feels like home for us and our characters, and for the love of god, let’s get to some meaningful Daryl and Carol scenes already? I have a feeling the ship baiting is going to get worse before it gets better, so let’s just stay strong in the meantime, guys. Remember there is nothing to gain from a Donnie and/or Carzekiel relationship for their own sake. Only six more weeks until we can turn our attention to 11C. We got this.

11x09 “No Other Way” Review

#caryl #caryl positivity #caryl is endgame #twd #twd review #twd season 11 #twd new haunts #twd spoilers

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belliesandburps · 3 years

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Our Favorites Handling Bellyaches - Part 2

I received plenty of asks about other characters responding to bellyaches, and so, here are another eight based off the characters requested!

Shoto Todoroki (My Hero Academia): Todoroki is canonically pretty gluttonous, just not ravenous. So he won’t rapidly stuff his face like Bakugou or Kirishima, but he’ll steadily eat a lot and keep going with that neutral look on his soft face. I imagine, for the most part, he doesn’t get stomach aches because he doesn’t overdo it often nor does he really change up his eating habits too much. But from time to time, he’ll try new things which won’t always agree with him or eat just a wee bit too much. If something he ate isn’t agreeing with him, he’ll be very subtle but blunt about it. He’ll have this mild yet notable look of strain on his face while using his cold hand to rub his belly. The cold side always helps to ease his stomach, which was what his mom used to do whenever lil Shoto got a tummyache as a kid. This might cause a few gas bubbles to gurgle up his throat, but he tends to muffle those in his mouth. Now, if he overate, he’s kind of winded. Todoroki will head to his room and huff breathlessly as he tugs his shirt up and exposes his taut, rounded belly, feeling up just how drum-tight it is beneath his hands. He’ll use both hands to massage his stomach in that instance; hot and cold, and try to use those abilities to ease his gut while he massages the overstuffed cramps away. When he’s especially full, his burps get much deeper and louder. If he muffles them, they rumble quite loudly in his cheeks, or if he really needs to get it out, he’ll throw his head back and expel a DEEP belch, which always leaves him huffing with relief after and muttering a small ‘excuse me.’ He tries not to bother Midoriya, but he absolutely loves it when Midoriya rubs his belly. Midoriya’s touch is always deeply comforting for him and not only eases his stuffed stomach but also makes him feel safe and secure. Plus, he finds a little amusement in how flustered Midoriya always gets rubbing his tum.

Tamaki Amajiki (My Hero Academia): Given the way his ability works and the sheer anxiety he feels, Tamaki is incredibly prone to tummyaches. Canonically, just thinking about something will make his stomach hurt. Anxiety-induced tummyaches leave Tamaki whimpering and shivering fearfully as he crumbles to the ground cradling his gurgling gut, and whining that he wants to go home. It’s...kind of the cutest freakin’ thing ever. But given how his quirk relies on food, Tamaki will very often try new and exotic meals or eat things that don’t agree with one another, which gives him a really gnarly stomachache. When that happens, Tamaki’s stomach is pressing out noticeably and rock-hard to the touch. He’ll groan with a notably nauseous look on his face and find himself stifling a series of wet, gurgling belches, some of which he can’t hold in. He gets very embarrassed about burping in public, but in these circumstances, he’s too nauseous to get anxious and nervous. Instead, he’s resisting the urge to throw up, and desperately rubbing his belly to settle it down. Fatgum or Mirio always suggest he drink some ginger ale to settle his tum down. Problem is, ginger ale makes Tamaki burp REALLY loudly, and even if he’s nauseous, if he ends up letting out a HUGE burp out in public? He may literally die from embarrassment. Tamaki’s also a really hungry lad too, so he tends to overstuff himself from time to time. If he does, he can sport a pretty sizable belly which he won’t admit feels REALLY satisfying, but less so if he overdid it and is suffering some seriously painful grumbles. When Tamaki is full to the brim, he’ll whimper at the realization that his belly is very visibly bloated and everyone can see it. He gets even more embarrassed when anyone wants to touch it or even rub it, making him whimper about wanting to crawl in his room and never leave. But when he’s packed to the brim, he’ll use the powers he gained from whatever meat he consumed to more rigorously rub his belly, especially octopus tentacles. Doing so works wonders for settling his stomach, but also makes him incredibly burpy. He’ll try his best to stifle them but many will roll out of his mouth and be both throaty and surprisingly big. Tamaki generally is a pretty burpy lad, simply because of how his stomach works to intensely process everything he eats for power. And it’s part of why he dreads eating out with anyone. But Kirishima and Fatgum are always amused or trying to top him, while Mirio just laughs and tells him he’s got skills.

Dabi (My Hero Academia): Dabi’s canonically got a weak stomach. He actually felt sick dealing with Spinner’s driving and complained about having a pretty bad stomachache. Like Natsu, I think Dabi gets motion sick very easily. He admits he doesn’t do well in cars, so I think the bumpier the ride the worse off he gets. If the league is in a van together, Dabi will be in the corner, doing his best not to groan miserably while his stomach churns deeply and unpleasantly from how turbulent it’s getting. He’ll be muffling really wet belches behind his fist, groaning after each one and mumbling that he feels like shit. Sometimes, he’ll burp so hard that his stomach lurches and he has to clamp his mouth shut to keep from throwing up on the spot. A good few times, the league has had to pull over so Dabi could rush out and puke off to the side of the road. If he throws up, Dabi gets really pissed out and starts shouting at Spinner for being such an awful driver or getting mad at Shigaraki for not having Kurogiri transport them to where they need to be. He hates showing weakness around the other villains, which is why he shows a lot of anger instead if he feels queasy. As such, if Dabi overeats or drinks too much and gets full to the point where he feels sick, he’s less annoyed and just groggy. He’ll slump back on his couch and unbutton his pants to give his belly some breathing room and really knead into his tight, bloated gut with both hands to try and settle it down. When he’s full, he tends to have really deep burps, which he freely and shamelessly lets out. Sometimes, he’ll slap the side of his bulging belly as hard as he can to let out the biggest burp he possibly can in an effort to bring whatever relief he can manage. Dabi knows how to burp on cue, so he’ll often gulp down air and belch it back up to try and ease a lot of the pressure festering in his gut. He also loves having his belly rubbed for any reason, so running your hands across his taut, distended middle will always help settle it down and leave him humming softly to your touch. If he’s relaxed enough though, that can also get him ‘riled up’ for NSFW shenanigans.

Idia Shroud (Twisted Wonderland): Idia is both canonically gluttonous and canonically works himself into getting some pretty gnarly tummyaches all the time. The mere thought of having to be around people twists his poor tummy into knots that can make him sick. When he works himself up, poor Idia will whimper and cradle his stomach while it gurgles in discomfort. He’ll actually tear up a little bit and whine about needing to hide out back in his room, unless Ortho drags him back into place. The little robot will offer to rub his big brother’s tummy to make it feel better or suggest they get something from Sam’s shop to help settle Idia’s stomach. Idia will be a whimpering, whining mess either way. He also tends to give himself really bad hiccups when he’s anxious and nauseous. He gives these loud, adorably high-pitched hiccups that leave him whimpering and covering his mouth, tearfully worried that someone’s gonna get really annoyed with him for being so loud. When he’s overstuffed because he ate way too much without even realizing it (as he tends to), Idia will groan and sit down on his bed, massaging his bulging belly and feeling it gurgle and churn heavily beneath his hand. Idia’s natural warmth processes what he eats faster than most people, which gives his tummy a much softer, sloshier feel to it when he’s stuffed to the brim. So when he rubs, he’ll actually knead into his temporary belly fat, crooning at how good it feels. But being stuffed also makes him pretty burpy, especially when he’s just binged on a bunch of sweets, junk food or soda. Any time he ever eats, he’s in his room. So, if he’s alone and he ends up letting out a huge burp, Idia will cover his mouth but actually giggle with amusement. But if the Prefect is in there with him rubbing his belly when Idia burps, he’ll whimper and apologize profusely. If he knows the Prefect likes ‘em, he’ll still whimper because he’s embarrassed about the way the surface of his soft, plush belly ripples when he burps really loudly. The Prefect will insist that they like that too, and Idia be flustered because he’s not used to people being attracted to him, so he’ll try and hide behind his sleeves adorably or bite on his oversized sleeve anxiously.

Venom (Spider-Man): Venom is a ravenous eating machine, so there’s very, very, VERY little that can upset that perpetually hungry belly of his. But one thing we canonically know doesn’t sit well in Venom’s stomach is other symbiotes OR extra spicy stuff. So if Venom gobbles up another symbiote, he’ll store it in his belly trying to absorb it, but the thing will savagely thrash around inside of his belly, seeping out to the surface. Doing so will make Venom very gassy, and he’ll end up burping uncontrollably while fighting to keep the rogue symbiote back down. Sometimes, Venom will burp so hard that the symbiote will partially spew out of his slimy maw, only for Venom to grossly slurp it back up before it can escape. If he has to hold it in long enough, it will make him very nauseous, to the point where his burps grow wetter and he ends up looking miserable and whining at Eddie to do something, which Eddie will just exasperatedly tell him this is entirely his fault. When it comes to overeating, Venom literally can’t eat too much food to make himself sick. Sooooo, the only overeating he does is if he ever tries to eat more than one person at once, or tries to eat a REALLY big enforcer. So, if Venom has two dirtbags squirming and thrashing in his belly or just a really really REALLY big guy, Venom will be immobilized. He’ll be sitting on his thick rump, groaning with his slimy tongue hanging out of his maw while his massive boulder of a belly thrashes around violently. And the end result will leave Venom groaning and belching hard enough to shake the ground itself. And if you think Venom has it bad now? Wait til Eddie has to sleeve it off and wakes up to the mother of all bellyaches in the morning. Venom is usually good about burping up the bones of his digested prey before letting Eddie take over, but Eddie will still be unbearably bloated and feel utterly nauseous when he awakes to this huge, taut belly that almost makes him look pregnant. When that happens, Venom’s tendrils will slither out and rub Eddie’s aching belly all over to try and settle it down with Venom assuring him that they’re okay. Eddie’s only response will be a record-shattering belch and a miserably groggy groan while Venom cackles and says he’s not too shabby for a human.

Rin Matsuoka (Free!): This shark-toothed lad has an appetite to spare, and also gets stomachaches a lot from not being careful about when he swims after eating. The latter has seen him throwing up from time to time. But when he gets cramps from swimming too fast, his stomach feels harder and gurgles a very thick, acidic-sounding gurgle. When that happens, Rin becomes a nauseous mess, groaning and muffling really wet-sounding burps, some of which he’ll just let out carelessly, too sick to care. Haruka and or Makoto (dealers choice) usually try to help by rubbing his aching stomach sensually. Sometimes, this helps quell the ache in his gut, sometimes, it’s too great to prevent him from spewing. But he’ll always moan and lean into their touch, desperate to have his belly rubbed, even if it’s in vein, because it still feels amazing. If Rin ate too much, his belly will be surging out and resting heavily against his pelvis, churning intensely and leaving Rin practically weighed down by his own gut. Rin has a serious stomach capacity and he can be pretty shameless. So when he’s overstuffed, Rin tends to burp a lot. He’ll knead his bulging belly and push out some huge, rumbling belches that force their way up his throats for a good few seconds straight and end with him moaning with relief. He’ll actually have a lot of pressure stored up from overeating. So after one really good burp, a good few throaty ones will follow back to back after the biggest one, and usually end with a really long one to punctuate his fullness. When that happens, Rin just smacks his lips and gives his belly a resounding slap of satisfaction, just feeling relieved at getting the pressure out, and no shame whatsoever. He’s also a giant tease, so if he sees his partner blushing, he’ll flash them a wink and ask them if they enjoyed the show.

Shiki Granbell (Edens Zero): The precious friend-loving boi is wild to his core and extremely excitable. And since he’s a gravity-defying powerhouse, he doesn’t get motion sick at all. He DOES, however, make the mistake of eating too much and flipping upside down. When that happens, poor Shiki’s tummy will be giving him all manner of grief. It will feel rock hard and visibly bloated, and Shiki will be a mess, whimpering and burping in his fist while whining about how much his belly hurts. When he does, he’s practically begging Rebecca to rub his tummy. Soon as she does, he’ll turn into a freakin’ puppy, the way he smiles and rests against Rebecca’s sides. That look of happy contentment on his face is all the reason Rebecca needs to gently massage his aching belly, no matter how many times she warns Shiki to stop and think before using his powers after eating. He’s also a very hungry lad, and as such, has overstuffed himself time and time again. This usually leaves his belly big and rounded, sitting heavily on his lap and sloshing heartily from how hyperactive his digestive system is. When he’s stuffed, he tends to get really big, rumbling burps that leave him huffing after they end, but he’ll still whine about his belly hurting. Rebecca will remind him that it’s his own fault for eating so much, but all he has to do is whimper pitifully to unwittingly win her over to start rubbing his belly. Like before, he’s very docile and contented when her hands are on his stomach. But if he’s stuffed, Shiki tends to burp really loudly to relieve the pressure in his rounded stomach, which always leaves Rebecca staring blankly and asking Shiki to excuse himself. He’ll just shrug and complain that he can’t help it. And then he’ll usually punctuate it by thumping his chest and letting out a HUGE burp that leaves him sighing with relief. But when he sees Rebecca’s eye start to twitch, theeeen he’ll sheepishly mutter a small “s’cuse me... ^^;”

Inuyasha (Inuyasha): Inuyasha’s a bit of a shameless, greedy pig. So he tends to overeat often or eat things he shouldn’t. In the latter’s case, Inuyasha’s stomach will be very noisy, churning up a storm and leaving him grimacing with discomfort. He’ll complain about his gut hurting, really kneading into his stomach, then telling Kagome to rub his belly...before faceplanting when she barks at him to “SIT!” for making demands. After that, he’ll growl but groan at how much worse his stomach feels from the sudden smash he was forced to do because of his beads. Then he’ll groggily yet begrudgingly ask “very nicely” if Kagome can rub his belly. When she does, despite his crass attitude, he’ll pant happily, letting his tongue hang out at how good it feels having his hard, churning stomach tended to by Kagome. If he overeats to the point where he gives himself a gnarly bellyache, he’ll be stuffed with a huge, medicine ball of a belly, one that’s forced his robes open while it weighs heavily on his lap. In cases like that where Inuyasha is full to the brim, he’ll knead his giant belly with his palms and claws and work up some of the largest belches he can manage. Kagome will get annoyed and tell him to stop being so gross, but Inuyasha will complain he can’t help it, he’s too full and needs to ease the pressure somehow. He’ll really knead and press into his belly too, making his fingers sink into his soft, currently sloshy gut to force up some huge, throaty belches. In fact, if Kagome complains that Inuyasha’s being gross, he’ll make it a point to make himself burp louder and more frequently just to troll her, especially since he knows if she uses the curse against him when he’s that bloated, he may be sick and even she doesn’t want that.......she’ll totally get back at him after he finishes digesting his heavy meal though...

And that’s your lot! If you guys have any more characters you wanna see write ups for, hit up my ask box! :)

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holdharmonysacred · 3 years

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Man I am thinking about VnC again since the anime is making me revisit the start of the series and that is a hell of a thing to contrast with the current arc of the manga, and some thoughts I’ve got right now are

1. Everyone keeps passing around the panels from the current arc of Noe flashing back to his first meeting with Vanitas, and while it’s fun to see everyone go “Noe is remembering Vanitas in a super positive, idealized light” for shipping purposes, it does completely miss a huge part of the point of the flashback. The original scene in chapter 1 shows Vanitas immediately after his speech looking like he’s about ready to gleefully murder someone in a revenge plot, so the fact that Noe’s flashback leaves that part out and frames Vanitas in a more idealized light is meant to reinforce that Noe’s gotten so wrapped up in his Absolute Bro Friendship (and maybe crush if you want to read it that way) with Vanitas that he’s forgotten all the red flags and signs of “Oh wait, Vanitas is kinda fucked up actually” that have been there since minute one that have led to the current arc’s big fight in the first place. (Though with that said, I 100% do not blame Noe for not noticing the red flags of “oh wait there’s something wrong here”, big Same Hat to that actually, this whole Thing is more of an-out-of story issue where it’s the readers who should see what’s up)

and

1. Going back to that first meeting again, as funny as it is to see Vanitas start this big grand recruitment speech only for Noe to hit him with an “Absolutely the fuck Not”, leading to Vanitas just trying to continue out of shock because he has no idea how to respond to a hard “No” answer, I think that right there is another big problem in Vanitas and Noe’s relationship that has festered to the point where the current arc is happening. Vanitas started things off thinking that he’s in charge in the relationship and that Noe is his sidekick or toadie friend, and it seems like some part of that underlying assumption never went away, which is why he keeps getting utterly blindsided by moments like the current arc where Noe does snap, because he keeps forgetting that Noe doesn’t tolerate any of that shit. Noe may be naive, but he is not a pushover, and he’s made it clear from the start that he’s not going to let Vanitas treat him like shit or use him as he pleases (think the “I am not helping you. You are helping me!!” scene). And at some point Vanitas needs to drill it into his head that Noe is his friend and equal and he will punch back if Vanitas starts shit. (Though to be clear, I don’t think any of this is malicious on Vanitas’s part, I think he’s just an idiot with baggage who doesn’t know how to do relationships good)

basically the current arc and the current status of Noe and Vanitas’s friendship is like. basically just peak “something’s gone wrong in this friendship, and both sides need to communicate or this is going to collapse”. They both need to seriously reassess their understanding of each other, because they are 100% not on the same page vis a vis their relationship, and this plus a myriad of other issues is letting them get played like damn fiddles. Granted, at the end of the day the bulk of the blame is still on Vanitas’s shoulders because he’s a dipshit and he still won’t tell anyone anything because he’s got ten bajillion pounds of Baggage(TM). Unless Mochijun decides to go turbo tragedy genre on us though I’m sure that it’ll eventually work out, it’ll be painful and slow but it’ll happen.

#case study of vanitas #vanitas no carte #vnc spoilers

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hellomynameisbisexual · 3 years

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“QUEER”

First of all, let’s clear up a common misconception. Queer does not just mean gay. It’s an umbrella term for an identity which deviates from society’s perceived norm: heterosexual, or straight. Queer can refer to sexualities — gay, bisexual, pansexual, — or it can refer to being gender-queer; i.e, any label that deviates from the perceived gender norm: the binaries, male and female.

“Queer” is a reclaimed slur.

If you do not fall under the umbrella of queerness, it is safe to assume that you cannot use it. At all.

I am bisexual.

This means I experience attraction to plural genders. Pansexual also works fine. For the difference between bisexual and pansexual — see here:

Being bisexual isn’t easy. I went through similar hardships to gay women: I experienced attraction to women and was scared of what this meant for me, in such an oppressively homophobic society.

I am not saying being bisexual is harder than being gay, nor the inverse. But my experiences are distinctly bisexual, not gay.

Without further ado, here are the 3 things I’ve found to be the hardest about being queer, but not gay (enough).

#1: Finding My Place

Or, not being queer enough

I always knew I wasn’t straight, but I didn’t know what I was. Up until recently, I was still questioning. This didn’t feel enough to join groups or conversations with LGBT+ folk, let alone go to pride. Was I even LGBT if I was never L, G, B, or T?

I am still yet to attend a pride, even though I identify (fairly confidently) as bisexual. I am in a relationship with a man. This is (problematically) known as a “straight-passing relationship” and makes me feel even more undeserving of a place at pride.

This has been upsetting to me at times. But for others, it can be outright devastating. Growing up and needing support, but feeling like you’re ‘not gay enough’ to ask for it? So many young people are being left alone and afraid. Finding others like you is vital to figuring out who you are. Likewise, finding spaces which are safe and inclusive is vital for anyone, regardless of their sexuality or gender identity. A friend of mine happens to be a transgender man, and he summed up the issue perfectly:

“One thing that I keep noticing is how all hangout spots are “gay bars”, or (far less common) “lesbian bars”. I’m a straight man, so I don’t feel like I’m supposed to be there, but hanging out at regular bars is still too much of a gamble, so I don’t really have anywhere to go.”

It goes without saying that gay folk aren’t always safe in these spaces, as seen by the homophobic attack on the Pulse nightclub in Orlando, in 2016. Bigotry hurts the entire LGBT+ community. Bigotry doesn’t stop to ask whether you identify as gay or otherwise queer before it pulls the trigger.

But the LGBT+ community itself is much more welcoming to those who “pick a side” and just come out as gay, already. The infighting is inexplicable when one looks to attacks such as that in Orlando: bigots don’t care which letter you are in the acronym. So why does gatekeeping exist when we need to be strong in the face of intolerance when fragmentation only makes us weaker? Who are we helping by continuing to exclude identities from the discussion?

#2: Myths and Misconceptions

Well, it stands to reason that if bisexuals are what they seem in TV and movies, why would anyone want to make them feel included? They’re “greedy” and inauthentic. They’re attention-seeking, not to mention their propensity for threesomes. Now, I haven’t been in a wild orgy yet, but it seems like it will only be a matter of time before I follow my natural path.

Straight men, in particular, need to own up to their assumption that bisexual women are down for a threesome. The thing is, we are. But not with you, you big ASSUMER.

Infidelity

All jokes aside, the stereotyping of bisexuals is not only hurtful, but leads to difficulties finding and maintaining relationships.

As I came to terms with my bisexuality, I also had to accept that I might never be fully trusted by my partner, regardless of their gender or sexuality. I was shocked when my partner reacted to my coming out with the equivalent of a shrug — so much so, that I burst into tears of gratitude that my soul-bearing moment hadn’t been met with slut-shaming or assumptions of disloyalty. Nothing has changed. If anything, our bond is even stronger for me having been more authentic after coming out.

But cruelty came from elsewhere: when I came out, I was told that my partner was to be pitied, either because I’m gay and in denial, or bound to cheat on him. The main consequence of such attitudes has been the crippling fear of coming out to my partner. It saddens me that I felt so relieved when he accepted me for being who I am, and loving him just the same as I always have.

This outcome is not the case for many couples, with straight folk worried that their bisexual partner will realise they’re gay and just leave them. This fear of abandonment comes from a place of ignorance. When the media presents bisexuality as a steppingstone on the way to “picking a team”, it’s no wonder that people struggle to trust their queer partners.

Other Queer Myths

The myth that all trans folk medically transition invalidates those who choose not to do so, and let’s not forget the ignorant jeers that it's all just a mental illness. Asexual folk battle the stereotype that they can never have a relationship and shall forever remain a virgin (because what an awful thing that would be, right?) And pansexuals… well, at the lighter end, they’re asked if they have sex with cooking utensils. But often, they’re erased as irrelevant because “we already have the label bisexual”.

This brings us onto the third and final difficulty that comes with queer folk who aren’t easily categorizable as gay: erasure.

#3: Erasure

Erasure refers to the denial of an identity’s existence or its validity as a label.

Non-binary folk face ongoing and loud claims that they simply do not exist. This is despite the historical and scientific evidence to the contrary. Plus, the most important evidence — them, existing. Asexual folk are told they simply have not found the right person yet, or that they are just afraid of sex. Demi-sexual folk are told “everyone feels like that, unless they’re just sleeping around!”. And bisexuals are dismissed as simply being in denial that they’re gay.

Monosexuality & The Gender Binary

Our culture is so built on monosexuality (being solely attracted to one gender — for instance, gay or straight). Monosexuality is reinforced through everything from marriage to dating apps, the media to what we teach in schools. People cannot fathom that someone might want to experience more than one gender in their lifetime.

The binary models of sex and gender are also deeply ingrained. These rigid belief systems combined are to blame for our inability to accept that bisexuals do not need to “pick a side”. I was paralysed by fear for 17 years because I found girls attractive and that might mean I’m gay, because bisexuals are just gays who haven’t realised they’re gay yet.

Bierasure

Bierasure is dangerous, firstly because it leads a child to have to internalise both biphobia and homophobia. For instance, I had to work through being taught to hate gayness, whilst being taught that any attraction to non-male genders made me gay.

Women were cute, and so I was gay, and this meant I was disgusting.

My own mother told me this. She also told me that something has “gone wrong in the womb” for a child to be gay. (Well, Mum, I’ve got some bad news about your womb!)And she, like any bigot, extended this theory to anyone who experiences same-sex attractions — anyone queer. This is another reason why bi-erasure is perilous. Whether you’re a gay, cis-male or a demi-bisexual, trans woman… if your parents will kick you out for being gay, they will likely kick you out for being any sort of queer.

If we deny the bigotry that bisexuals undergo, we will continue to suffer. It won’t just go away. It will fester, with bisexuals having no one they can go to who believes them. And thus:

Erasure Kills

Bullying and suicide rates of queer-but-not-gay people continue to sky-rocket. We must direct funding, support and compassion to every queer individual, as they are all vulnerable to discrimination and bullying. The problem is being left to fester. This is in part because bigots treat all queer labels as just ‘gay’, deeming them equally unworthy. This is how far erasure can go.

Conclusion

Earlier on, I stated that my experiences are distinctly bisexual. The same applies to any queer identity.

Emphasising our differing paths and struggles is important to avoid the aforementioned erasure of already less visible groups. But this does not mean that the LGBT+ community should be fragmented by these differences.

If we can unite in our hope to live authentically and love freely, we will be stronger against bigotry. We are fighting enough intolerance from without: there is no need to create more from within.

So out of everything, what’s the hardest part about being bisexual?

It’s the fact that nobody knows it’s this hard.

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kaypeace21 · 3 years

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Stranger things is about mental health & trauma- deal with it!

I’ve seen a lot of people claim anyone who mentioned this topic immediately be gaslit and told they’re “just crazy” and “rudely projecting their own issues on to the characters.’ Like- no you don’t have to believe my Will DID/Lonnie theory ( I could be wrong). But to claim one of the show’s central themes isn’t about mental health/trauma (screams either complete lack of lit comprehension or denial cause you have your own negative biases towards such people). So let’s just go into what’s literal text-not subtext/symbolism. Just the super blatant stuff. RIGHT IN THE SHOW!

-We have El when she first appears on screen asked by Benny if her parents starved and hurt her and if that’s why she ran away. Benny then calls CPS to say El “may have been ab*sed or something.” After this Lucas says there is “seriously something wrong with her-wrong in the head. She’s probably from the NUT-HOUSE in curly county.penthurst” We also see El cannonically has PTSD-all of s1 she’ll see something benign (a cat, a coke commercial, a closet) and is triggered to see a traumatic flashback. That’s literally ptsd. There’s also hints throughout the seasons she’s developmentally behind in both language, telling time etc (neglect like El’s irl can cause an intellectual disability-analysis on El/that subject here).The real pethurst in pensylvannia (not the one in stranger things/ Curly county) closed in 1986- it was a facility for people and mostly kids with intellectual disabilities (it wasn’t technically a psych facility like the one in st)-but it was infamous for it’s abuse of these intellectually disabled patients kept there. We also have Brenner be a ab*sive psychiatrist.

- Hopper after suffering from the loss of his daughter. Is popping pills like candy, drinking and smoking constantly. He later says he used to hallucinate and forgot what was real -seeing and hearing sarah and says if he didn’t confront the pain he’d “fall down a black hole he couldn’t get out of.” NO... subtext here about what the void represents nope.

- Both mothers (Terry & Joyce) are dismissed as being mentally ill and simply grieving the loss of their kids . But both end up being right about the supernatural.

- “Terry pretends Jane is real. i mean it’s all make believe. you know the doctors all say it’s a coping mechanism.”

- While with Joyce the whole town pre s1 already questioned her mental health. Jonathan says “She used to have anxiety problems (pre s1).” And Jonathan, Hopper, and Lonnie all assume she’s hallucinating: talking to Will via lights, seeing a man without a face, saying Will’s body is fake -due to grief. Plus Lonnie mentions the fact Joyce’s aunt Darlene also used to hallucinate as a possible reason (terry’s aunt also had mental health issues mentioned in s2 by Becky). Lonnie even says everything Joyce is seeing is “all in her head.” Hopper and Jon both say she needs to sleep and accept reality and Lonnie says she needs to see a “shrink”. Hopper “i’m not saying that you’re crazy”. Joyce : “no, you are.” Joyce also says to Lonnie “Stop looking at me like that... like everyone else like i’m out of my damn mind.” Hopper also says about Joyce she’s “on the edge”. Callahan says in response , “she’s been on the edge for a while now” (referring to her mental health- even before Will’s dissappearance)”. While Lonnie says Jonathan is “feeding into her hallucinations ... you’re going to push her right over the edge.” In s2 Hopper says “ I think everyone is on edge- you, me, Will most of all. (when talking about Will’s ptsd/trauma)”

- in s1 They claim Will just “fell” over the edge of the quarry’s cliff. Later the only other queer coded character (Mike) jumps off the quarry cliff (where Will’s body was found) cause the homophobic troy forced him too jump. Troy even says earlier dead-Will is “flying with all the other fairies all happy and gay” (to Mike). And Troy says to Hopper El made Mike “fly” after jumping off the cliff. Friendship saved him from jumping off the edge metaphorically ( and he’ll prob eventually be happy and gay too).

s2/3

-Will is seeing a therapist . And we are told he has ptsd and will experience the anniversary effect, personality changes,nightmares, having episodes, etc. And things “will get worse before they get better”. Mike also asks if what Will is seeing is “real or like the doctors say all in your head?” And Will continues to see hallucinations of the mf/upsidedown that only he can see initially.

-Hopper also agrees with owens mentioning how he knew guys with ptsd . joyce : “it’s not like he’s describing a nightmare. He talks about them like they’re real.” Hopper: “Yeah, because they’re not nightmares they’re flashbacks.I think he’s right about trauma.I think everyone is on edge (bringing that s1 ref back), Me you, Will, most of all.Nothing’s gonna go back to the way that it was. But it’ll get better.In time.”

-Nancy suffers from survivor’s guilt and drunkingly says she killed Barb. Jonathan says like Nancy he has “a weight that you that carry all the time . i feel it too.” (cough depression). He also says he tries to be there for Will but says about Will “he’s not the same. maybe things can’t go back to the way they were. (mirroring Hopper’s words earlier that season)”

-Jonathan said in s1 Joyce had “anxiety issues” than Nancy says in s3 “you really are your mother’s son... you worry too much.” Then we see him look worried after the comment.

- in s2, Axel & a scientist both call El and Will “schizos” because of their powers. In s3 mrs driscoll isn’t believed about the supernatural cause she’s schizophrenic-but like Joyce/Terry was right.

- Kali saves a woman named Dottie (a british slang term for crazy) from a mental hospital and then compares herself and El to dottie. saying her non-powered gang is “Like us ...outsiders... society discarded them.” In graphitti we even see the title “obedlam” a british poem about discarding the mentally ill and leaving them homeless. El before this sees a mentally ill man screaming “we’re all dead!” Kali’s friend says to El, after this encounter they were “dead all of us” until kali “saved them here” (points to head) “and here” (points to heart). Pointing to the theme of love and friendship helping those with such issues. Similar to the cliff analogy.

-The cycle of ab*se. Max in s2 says she’s afraid of becoming like Billy (her ab*ser). We see Billy mimic his ab*ser neil and inflict pain on max. In s3 we see the roots of his behavior are linked to mimicking Neil- Neil in a flashback says about baseball “what are you scared?” “ did i raise a p*ssy for a son”. So young Billy later in a fight says to a boy “ what are you scared to fight me? fight me p*ssy. (as he beats the boy)” Deflecting his anger of his father on to someone else. In s3, We see as a kid he used to say to Neil “don’t hurt her” (his mom)-specifically after Neil backhand slaps her -but we later see possessed Billy backhand slap Max (just like neil). The resentment to his mother leaving - festered into how he views women and max negatively . And his attraction to mrs wheeler prob is linked to him subconsciously missing his mother. Max in s2 even says he can’t take it out on her mother so he does so to her instead (we even have Billy hallucinate hurting mrs wheeler).We see in s2 the cycle of abuse is there- Billy mimics Neil, and then Max mimics Billy. Billy harrasses Max and yells “SAY IT!” (mimicking Neil). Max like Billy later yells “SAY IT” and uses a bat /violence to stand up for herself against Billy- which earlier she said she was trying to combat … explaining she can be angry like Billy sometimes but she never wants to be like him (her nickname symbolizing this: aka ‘mad max’). Billy’s last dying words were an apology to Max- for becoming her neil. And we hopefully will see Max break this cycle.

- Will says his now memories (that he describes like dreams) are “growing “, “spreading “,and “killing”. While Kali says they need to face their father and (as Brenner) says El has to confront her “wound” or else it’ll “grow”, “spread” and “eventually it’ll kill her.” Kali says she used to be like El . She used to bottle her pain away and it “spread.” But she then says “I confronted my pain and I finally began to heal (from those wounds).” We also see with jonathan and nancy when describing “shared trauma” zoom in onto the scars on their hands. The wound heeled into a scar so to speak.

S2 & 3 ENDINGS

both have Hopper do a speech that delves into dealing with trauma/depression but still finding good along the way.

-s2 Hopper outside the snowball: “how are you holding up? Yeah, that feeling never goes away. It is true what they say, you know. Everyday it does get easier.”

-s3 Hopper monolouge : “ Feelings jesus. For so long, i’d forgotten what those even were. I’ve been stuck in one place,in a cave you might say , a deep dark cave (cough s2 supernatural cave). For the first time in a long time, i started to feel things again. I started to feel happy. Life... yeah sometimes it’s painful .sometimes it’s sad, and sometimes it’s suprising... happy.. And when life hurts you, because it will .remember the hurt . The hurt is good. It means you’re out of that cave.”

BUT YES- St has nothing to do with mental health/trauma, we’re just “crazy” and “projecting”. It’s not like some of ya’ll act pompous when you just have a bias and get pissy at the idea of relating to characters you “other” as “crazy” or “damaged” irl or anything (so attack people for pointing it out). Or (benefit of the doubt) you are just like.... oblivious... or just a kid who doesn’t know better XD

#stranger things #el hopper #will byers #jim hopper #joyce byers #max mayfield #billy hargrove #kali prasad #mike wheeler #jonathan byers #nancy wheeler

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chuckbass-love · 3 years

Note

hi! i wanted to request a smutty fic w prompt 100 with ransom and reader. maybe they were at a party and someone was hitting on reader and touching her and ransom got mad. 🤗

Hi love! Again, to everyone (including you) that has sent in a request, i’m sorry it’s taken so long. I feel bad for making people wait but i never wanna upload work that’s anything short of great in my eyes. I always want to be at my best. This didn’t quite go the way i wanted it to but i really hope it’s still good. Everyone reading, please feel free to leave feedback. It helps and is very appropriated.

Disclaimer: My work is not to be posted anywhere else other than MY Tumblr, Wattpad and Ao3 without my permission. However, reblogs are welcome.

Prompt #100: “Call me selfish, but i don’t ever want anyone else touch you”

Pairing: Ransom Drysdale x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Jealousy, swearing, smut, sex, oral (f receiving), dirty talk, slight ownership kink (if you squint) and daddy kink. 18+

Word Count: 3,563

GIF NOT MINE!!! Credit to @kylosrehn go check them out💜

Over My Dead Body

When making plans for the weekend with Ransom, going to a party full of stuck up rich people wasn’t exactly on your agenda. But, seeing it’s part of his lifestyle, you made an exception and besides it was yet another party hosted by his grandfather Harlan.

You never used to attend these parties since Ransom never invited you. He preferred to keep your interactions strictly bedroom related, nothing more, nothing less. It was beginning to confuse the hell out of you because sometimes on a rare occasion, he’d let you meet his friends and family.

But as previously stated, it’s rare.

When the two of you first met, sparks flew instantly. Your friend had introduced you, she was on a date with her boyfriend, her boyfriend brought him along just like she brought you along.

Their way of setting you two up. And it worked.

A solid 2 hours after meeting the man, he was balls deep inside of you making you forget your own name and turning you into a moaning mess underneath him. Since then you’ve been hooked. Whenever either of you are horny, you fuck.

But like any other fuck buddy relationships, there’s a catch. You two have a clear love for each other, one that neither of you will ever be brave enough to admit. Mostly because Ransom is a huge commitment phobe. The thought of only being with one girl for the rest of his life scares him and you just don’t admit your feelings because the thought of being rejected weighs heavier than the optimism of it working out in your favour.

Although he’s scared of settling down, Ransom sure did seem keen to bring you along with him to this party tonight which now you come to think of it, he’s been like that the last few times he’s taken you out.

Maybe he’s changing his mind.

“Red wine?” you hear, turning your head to see the man himself holding a wine glass for you and a tumbler glass for himself, no doubt filled with whiskey on the rocks. He does love his whiskey after all.

“Thank you, so tell me again. Why am i here?” you ask before taking a rather large sip of your wine, you certainly need liquid courage if you’re going to talk to these people.

“Who else would i have brought?” he responds, voice monotone, almost as if he’s bored and very uninterested. So all this time you thought there was a possibility of him changing his mind when in reality, he’s just been bringing you along to all of these lavish parties to keep up appearances.

No doubt to keep that controlling mother off of his back.

You shrug, continuing to look around as Ransom greets some of his grandfathers guests. One of them looks at you before looking at Ransom who eventually introduces you two, attempting to strike up some small talk until he’s being dragged away to talk to a group of men who no doubt are a lot older than him. Leaving you stood all alone.

That’s when you spot a guy across the room. He looks around Ransoms age. Tall, expensive suit, blonde hair and blue eyes. Plus he seems friendly. He raises his hand to wave and you reluctantly strut over, greeting him with a shy smile which he reciprocates.

“So, what’s a beautiful woman like yourself doing stood all alone?” his compliment has you flustered and unsure how to respond but still, you find the words “thank you and i’m not alone, i came here with Ra-”

“Ransom Drysdale, yeah i saw you with him, where did he disappear to?”

“I have no idea, off talking to random strangers” you chuckle nervously, feeling slightly embarrassed about his absence. Little do you know, Ransom can see you with this mystery man, gritting his teeth and clenching his jaw at the sight of you laughing.

Surely he can’t be that funny, he thinks to himself. But he is. He’s hilarious.

“So what do you think drew her to him then?” you giggle, gesturing to the couple next to you, a woman who’s dressed up to the nines with her husband who looks a lot older than her “oh obviously his looks, what makes you question her intentions?” he smirks and you shove him playfully.

“Oh of course. What was i thinking? Silly me” you wink, downing the rest of your drink in seconds before he takes another flute of champagne off of the waitresses tray for you.

“If i didn’t know any better i’d say you’re trying to get me drunk sir” you say using your best posh voice. Unbeknownst to you though, Ransom can hear your whole conversation, every single thing you’re saying to this man.

But can he really be mad? You’re only talking to, right? Besides he’s not exactly your boyfriend so you’re free to talk to whoever you want. Not that you want anyone else.

What he won’t admit now though is how jealous he is right now, he’s had just about enough of another man making you laugh the way that he’s supposed to make you laugh and now the only way this man is taking you home is over his dead body. But for now, he’s gonna make use of his best poker face, side eyeing the two of you on the sly as anger starts to build.

You start to look around the room yourself, trying to find Ransom and as you do, you spot him heading over to the drinks table so you decide to take that as your opportunity to excuse yourself, joining your date.

“Hey you” you bump him, a cheesy grin plastered across your face, one that fades as quickly as it appeared thanks to Ransoms straight and unimpressed expression.

You stand in front of him, blocking his access to the drinks “is everything okay?” but instead of an answer, you get silence. No response whatsoever. Why is he ignoring you?

“Ransom?”

“What?” he mutters, evidently agitated “what’s wrong?”

He chuckles in response, shoving past you to get his drink and lifting the tumbler to his plump pink lips, practically gulping it down without even so much as a flinch “oh don’t worry, everything is fine. Hey why don’t you go back to your little conversation with Mr Perfect will you” and just like that, he’s storming away from you and up the stairs to the second floor, instantly regretting sending you back to that man.

What could have gotten him so wound up?

If seeing you with that guy is the problem then maybe he shouldn’t have left you.

And without a second more to overthink and fester over his random outburst, you return to the other gentleman. One who knows how to treat you with respect as opposed to shutting you out.

“Hello again” he beams “i was about to say your name but then i remembered we never exchanged those”

“I’m Y/N”

“Jack”

“Nice to meet you Jack”

“Likewise”

The two of you shake hands as another conversation sparks up, pushing all Ransom related thoughts to the back of your already full brain.

Whilst Ransom is sat in the bathroom. Flustered, angry and ready to blow his lid at something so small. A situation that means nothing. That man means nothing to you, surely. You’re just being friendly, after all he did leave you to go and socialise. What did he expect you to do? Stand in the corner away from everyone?

You don’t want this guy though. Jack is just a friend you’ve made here. You want Ransom and he wants you too but his pride is in the way.

God what is wrong with him?

Evidently a lot.

One minute he’s all over you, taking you to parties and the next he’s giving you the silent treatment and acting like you’ve done something wrong.

And the only reason for his odd behaviour is because of the plan he made for tonight. Anyone who knows Ransom knows very well about his thoughts on relationships but with you, things are different and they always have been. You force him out of his comfort zone, you challenge him and you make him better. He was so nervous for tonight that the second the two of you arrived at the party he was drinking and acting strange.

As much as the thought of settling down scares him, he knows that it’s much better to tell you than watch you leave and find someone new. Seeing you with that guy only confirmed that.

After spending who knows how long in the bathroom trying to talk himself out of kicking up a fuss, he heads back down to the party, maybe he should go and spend more time with you but as he walks down the stairs, he instantly spots you and that same guy again. His hand is on your arm and you’re way too close for his liking. Close enough to make his skin crawl and his jaw clench even tighter.

He storms over, hearing his voice as he does so.

“So i know you came here with Ransom but i was wondering if i could maybe get your number?” he asks, scratching the back of his head as he anxiously awaits your reply.

Jacks nerves are abundantly clear until Ransom cuts you off, stopping you from opening your mouth to respond. He tugs on your arm, pulling you back “the answers no, prick” he snaps, dragging you through the crowd and out into the cold night air, barely giving you a chance to say goodbye to anyone and causing goosebumps to form all over your bare arms and legs.

“Ransom what the fuck?” you yell, trying your best to yank your arm from his tight grip “just get in the fucking car” he demands, opening the door for you. How chivalrous of him. His raised voice made you jump a little, cowering slightly and leaving you with no choice but to do as you’re told.

The second he gets in too, he’s shoving the key in the ignition and speeding off away from the party. Jack and all of the crowd long forgotten not just out of sight but out of mind too. Now all you can think about is Ransom and what’s got him so angry all of a sudden as he was pretty happy on the journey here.

You daren’t speak though, god forbid. Your words will only wind him up further.

Knuckles start to turn white as he grips the steering wheel like never before, his fingers tapping frantically which is an obvious indication of his need to get home as soon as physically possible.

You honestly can’t remember if you’ve ever seen him this angry in the whole time you’ve known him and that’s quite literally the scariest thing about this.

Eventually you reach his house, or should you say bachelor pad and he barely waits a second for you to exit the car before he’s storming off into the house without you.

Once you get inside he’s nowhere to be seen until you hear a loud slam of a door coming from upstairs. You head up and into the master bedroom instantly to find him undressing and discarding his clothes across the room.

“Ransom” you approach him with caution, worry filling your soft and caring voice but the moment you’re a few inches away and about to touch him, he shoots around, scaring you.

“Would you have given him your number?” he questions, his blue eyes looking deep into yours almost like he’s looking into your soul.

“Who? Jack? No, of course not. Why’re you even asking me that?” you protest, hoping he’ll believe you but now you come to think of it, you probably looked way too close for comfort.

“Lies”

“Why are you being like this?”

“Because it sure seemed like the two of you were getting awfully cosy tonight, laughing, drinking, touching each other” he explains, closing the space between you and making you gulp.

“Well maybe if you hadn’t of treated me like i was invisible all night then i wouldn’t have needed to make friends with him. You forget that you barely said a word the whole time” now you’re the one that’s angry as you step back after your outburst, watching him carefully. His next actions shock you though as he just laughs, turning away and speed walking across the bedroom to the en suite. But before you can even follow him, he slams the door, making you flinch and then as you thought he would, he locked it.

Why can’t he ever be mature enough to talk about things. All he ever does is avoid confrontation. You don’t really like it either but at least you’re trying to sort whatever issue has him all in his feelings and angry.

Rather than sitting and waiting for him to leave the bathroom, you decide to go and get ready for bed in the other one, showering before getting dressed into whatever you can find. Which just so happen to be a shirt of his.

He dries off, wrapping a towel around his waist before unlocking the door and walking out to find you sat on the bed.

“The answer is no and that’s the truth”

“Oh yeah? Then why was his hands all over you like you were there with him tonight?”

“That was nothing, we were just laughing. What about you though huh? Snapping at me all night, leaving me and then deciding at the very last second that you want to spend time with me. Felt a lot like just another one of your games” it doesn’t look like he believes you and now you’re over trying to prove yourself.

“I left to talk to people and i was acting funny because going to those parties never end well, i wasn’t playing games with you” he stalks towards you, closing the gap.

Okay, now that makes sense. It explains all about how his behaviour changed when the two of you entered the actual party.

“You know, seeing you with that guy wasn’t easy. I got angry. All this time i thought you knew that you belonged to me, clearly i was wrong” his fingers graze your arm before settling underneath your chin and tilting it up, forcing you to look directly into his eyes.

“Maybe you need a reminder” he’s so close to you now, his hands are all over your waist, moving down agonisingly slow towards your ass. He smacks the backs of both thighs as a signal for you to jump and you do. How can you resist?

His lips attack yours in a brief and passionate kiss before he throws you down to the bed “i’m gonna make you forget all about him” he then removes the towel.

You furrow your brows watching as he lifts your (his) shirt up, revealing your laced panties. His favourite on you. He spreads your legs with his hands as he tugs you to the edge of the bed, kneeling down to press a firm kiss to the inside of both your thighs.

That’s when he does what he always does, turns you into a moaning mess by devouring your pussy like a man starved. Sucking, slurping and flicking his tongue all over your sex effortlessly like your body was made for him. Just how you felt the first time he ever touched and tasted you.

“Mhmm, just like that” you run your fingers through his styled locks, messing them up without a care. “I’m the only one for you" he mumbles and it vibrates onto your clit making you giggle.

“You’ve always been the only one” you whisper and he looks up at you with lustful eyes but also a look of love. One you’ve not seen before or maybe you’ve never noticed.

The way he looks at you isn’t new but all this time you’ve assumed it’s because of his attraction to you, that he’s only looking at you that way because of his uncontrollable lust.

“Only i am allowed to touch you like this, taste you” his lips wrap around your clit, sucking like his life depends on it as his thick digits tease your dripping entrance “s’wet sweetness”

You tug a little harder as you lift your bum off of the bed, grinding yourself on his face with a burning desire for that sweet release, the one only he has been able to give you “that’s it sweetness, cum all over my face, cum for daddy” his low and raspy voice spurring you on and talking dirty sends you over that edge as you cum with a loud moan. Quicker than usual.

You try to push him off as you scrunch your eyes closed, seeing stars. All you can focus on is how sensitive you are but he’s cleaning you up with his tongue, clearly can’t get enough of how you taste.

“Always so sweet” he gets back up, moving you further up the bed and parting your legs as he hovers above you with his fingers making quick work to slip your panties to the side. The tip of his cock rests at your entrance as he dips his head to capture your lips with his tongue pushing past them and into your mouth to battle with your tongue.

You can taste yourself on him and that alone arouses you leading you to wrap your arms around his neck and your legs around his torso “i need you, now” you plead, urging him to give you what you want, which he does. He pushes in slowly at first, seating himself deep inside before really moving.

His pace gets going, rocking his hips back and forth, making sure to fill you up all the way as you claw at his back, your mouth hanging open in the perfect O shape “fuck, daddy it feels so good” you groan moving with him in his thrusts.

“Feel good baby?” he pants, resting his head in the crook of your neck, placing open mouthed kisses to your weak spot “tell daddy how good it feels sweetness. Use your words” he growls and you lift his head up so you can kiss him, cupping his face with one hand “it feels incredible, please don’t stop”

“Wouldn’t dream of it. Wanna feel that pussy cream all over my cock. Give it to me sweetness” he licks his index and middle fingers before pressing them down on your clit hard, rubbing aggressively as his pace turns animalistic.

He’s ramming into you with such vigor, his breath fanning your shoulder and the noises he’s making are a far cry from just moaning. No he’s not moaning, he’s upset too or at least bothered by something.

“Can feel you squeezing me sweetness, you close?” he kisses your shoulder but this time he’s more gentle, almost as if he’s afraid of breaking you.

“Yes, oh my god i’m gonna cum. Please, keep going”

The two of you move more frantically. Desperately chasing a joint release.

Grunts, growls and the sound of skin slapping together fills the room, the sound bouncing off of the walls as you both near closer. That’s when you turn the tables around, kissing his neck this time, biting too.

“I’m gonna cum daddy”

“God i love you so much, cum with me”

3.2.1

And you’re legs are shaking in the air, his cock starts to twitch before he coats your walls with his hot seed.

“I love you too”

As he looks back into your eyes, you see it, the tears brimming and threatening to spill but he quickly kisses you, knowing full well that it’ll distract you but not this time. You pull back to look again but he only moves.

“You know i don’t think i was ever angry at you” he starts, standing up to retrieve the towel “it was him. Seeing him flirting with you only made me realise what i wanted” you get off of the bed now, approaching him “call me selfish, but i don’t ever want anyone else to touch you” he rests his forehead to yours, his hands resting on your waist “you’re mine, plain and simple”

“You never were one to do things the easy way” the two of you laugh before he kisses you “the easy way is boring”

Although you’re shocked about his confession, you daren’t pry more right now on his feelings. For now you just want to enjoy this moment. The two of you feel the same and that’s enough for you.

-----------------------------

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abyssthepansexual · 3 years

Text

Aizawa x son reader turned villain

Plus: best friends Midoriya and Todoroki.

Your Quirk is that you can create flowers and other plants bloom from your hair and arms.

Really long cuz I didn't feel like making multiple parts.

Does abandoning your father and exposing the government count as angst? Or are y'all just badass?

Your father was protective of you even before your quirk began to show.

He hoped you would have a strong quirk to be able to protect yourself.

He didn't exactly know what to do when he learned his son could sprout flowers wherever he wanted.

He was disappointed but he wouldn't say that out loud.

He just had to make sure you were safe at all times.

Eventually you both learned your quirk could be used for healing. So he had you enroll at UA as a support hero and you spent most of your time with Recovery Girl.

During your time at UA you began spending less time with your father as he became busy with his new students.

You got to know his students more than you would like.

Your father's lessons got them sent to the infirmary more than you'd like.

It only seemed to worsen when the new 1-A came in at the start of the new year with you being a second year.

You respected most of the students, noting their hard work towards the goal of becoming heroes.

But you never really liked any of them simply because they got more of your father's attention.

You admired heroes for saving people, and liked that in some ways you could help the heroes.

You accidentally discovered an antidote to the quirk removing substances that came from the Overhaul incident.

You were the talk of hero society for a while admired for the great feat at such a young age.

But still you didn't have your father's attention.

You never had doubts among heroes until you got to know the truths of the world more.

It started when you started finally talking to two students in your father's class when they were sent into the infirmary.

Todoroki had once explained how he got his scar and why he never wanted to use his fire.

The doubts began to fester.

Then Midoriya came next he told you of his bullying when he was younger and as you became friends he even let you in on the secret of his quirk.

You liked your new friend, but the doubts only grew.

The final breaking point was when you stumbled across a lesser populated district. Abandoned buildings, homeless people who were sick and starving.

You knew you should have gone home to your father and his fiance Hizashi.

But you felt defiance in your veins as you began your work.

For months you used your quirk until you felt like you'd fall apart, earning the trust and reliance of these people abandoned by heroes.

You grew trees for construction, healthier air, and fruits.

With the wood you and the people fixed abandoned homes and made gardens where you used your quirk to aid in the growth of fruits and vegetables that could be sold to buy cattle and other supplies.

You made medicines, hygiene products, and various other items to keep these people going.

Quirk or quirkless you helped them find ways to use their skills to keep things functioning without the help of the government officials or heroes.

You were their hero.

But your exhaustion was showing and your friends were worried.

They had followed you once after you'd missed and entire day of school only to leave with a lot of things they knew you'd made.

"You're amazing, everything you've done here is amazing." Midoriya had told you when they'd found you after asking people about what they knew of you.

Todoroki couldn't find words to say but there was admiration and amazement in his eyes as he watched the work going into your project all around him.

They helped you as well and over the course of time the project would someday be finished and this would be just the start of your new plans.

Midoriya convinced you to bring your father here to show him your great act of heroism.

Your father had been angry.

"It was foolish to come here! Villains are known to frequent these areas!" He had shouted at you.

"Yet I've had no problems, and I'm not going to stop. So if you want no part in it then ignore me and leave! You've always been good at that."

You'd dropped out of UA not long after and stopped coming home. Aizawa had tried searching the town you'd helped but the people said you'd gone after finishing helping them. He had nothing in terms of finding you.

In truth that was a lie you'd come back frequently and actually worked with other districts on repairing their way of living as well.

With the help of people with minor creation and destruction quirks you'd even made a vast underground bunker system welcoming in the homeless, villains, shunned children who had "villainous" quirks, and so many more.

Call it your safe haven so to speak.

"I have a proposal for you." You said to Shigaraki having accidentally met the group when you found them injured after fighting the heroes.

"What is it?" Shigaraki questioned as you patched up his arm.

"I'd like to work with you, I can offer you medical help and supplies, I can also make various poisons and toxins that can be spread through the air. Some can knock people out, make them hallucinate their worst fears, and I recently developed one that can remove people's quirks upon breathing it. I also can promise you followers."

Your offer was a valuable one, one that the LoV would have to be absolute morons to refuse.

Now united with them, and having your people carefully sew doubts amongst the rest of Japan in whispers and rumors, you would destroy the hero world.

Midoriya and Todoroki had come to find you again this time with classmates with them. Your friends went through their own stages of denial and acceptance and convinced others to follow your cause to better society.

After months of enlarging the bunker into what now seemed like an underground city you had enough followers to finally go public and sink your words into the ears of not just Japan but the rest of the world.

After the final month of prep you went live to all of the world translators at the ready. All of your followers knew what was going to happen and sealed themselves away in the bunker.

Exposing the truths of heroes and their secrets, the people they'd tortured or abandoned, ect.

Then at the end of your speech all who weren't in the bunker became exposed to your intoxicated air bombs that had been strategically laid throughout the city. Anyone who hadn't been in the safety of your underground city was now quirkless and that was seen all over the world.

Starting in Japan people rose up to fix the world and soon riots all over the world began following you and the LoV.

The world of the powerful would fall and the people would rise to fix the wrongs.

Heroes and villains will always exist, sometimes the two just get confused with one another and sometimes people need a shive to understand.

History would be mixed in the story that is you.

To some people you are a Hero.

To others you are the villain.

People never quite learned which of those titles you believed you were.

Were you even sure yourself?

All that mattered now was that you knew you had your father's attention, you'd have it for a long time.

After all you were the world's #1 fascination.

#mha #bnha #mha x male reader #aizawa shouta

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doodles-at-random · 3 years

Text

Future’s Secret

AO3

Synopsis: After the events of Gang of Secrets, Ladybug resolves to have a heard-to-heart with Chat Noir. She knows she can’t reveal her identity to him, and he deserves to know why.

The moon shone bright in the sky as Ladybug and Chat Noir soared from rooftop to rooftop on their nightly patrol. She was thankful that it was a quiet night with no akuma sightings. It had been awhile since they had an uninterrupted patrol.

On the other hand, she had a lot more time to think about what she was going to say. Too much time. She had already spent an agonizing afternoon writing drafts in her diary and erasing and rewriting and erasing… An akuma attack would have been, well, not good, but at least a distraction. But she had promised Tikki - promised herself- that she would have this conversation now, before any miscommunication had time to fester.

“All clear,” she said to herself, landing on the rooftop they had started their patrol on. She turned to Chat Noir, who had already landed and was casually leaning against his staff.

“You seem to be a better mood, m’lady,” he said, grinning.

She blinked. “I- Yes, I guess I am,” she said, smiling back. Her talk with Ayla had relieved so much pressure. She was looking forward again to handling her Ladybug duties with her newfound backup on the “home front”, so to speak.

“Glad to hear, bugaboo. Catch you at the usual time tomorrow?”

“Actually, Chat, if you have a minute…”

“Anything for you, m’lady.” He held out a hand (how gentlemanly of him, as always), helping her take a seat on the edge of the rooftop. He slid down next to her, collapsing his staff and stowing it with practiced ease.

Ladybug took a deep breath. It’ll be okay, you got this! “So… you know how I was… having a rough time with the guardianship and, um, everything else going on in my civilian life?”

Chat Noir nodded.

“I found someone to talk to.”

“For relationship advice? I suppose you’re allowed to pass on the advice of an expert like moi, but if you need-“

“About everything.”

Silence. The worst response.

Ladybug looked at him; his green eyes searching her face in confusion and alarm.

“Everything? Everything everything?”

She nodded, swallowing nervously.

Chat Noir stood abruptly. “I see how it is. You say we can’t share this secret. Then-“ he held up his hand, starting to count on his fingers- “you exclude me from guardian business, exclude me from your ‘secret’ identity, exclude me from heart-to-heart chats-“

“What do you think this is?” Ladybug snapped, rising to her feet as well.

“Er-“ He looked taken aback, as if it was only supposed to be him feeling upset right now.

“I never want to hurt your feelings, Chat.”

“Well they’re feeling pretty hurt right now.”

“Just- just hear me out. Partner to partner.”

Chat huffed and crossed his arms. “Fine. I’m listening.”

She squared her shoulders. “I felt trapped. I was trapped. Lying to all my friends and family all the time. And the guardianship… it hasn’t been easy. There are kwamis everywhere and-“ Ah, she was rambling. She waved her hand in front of her, to clear that train of thought. “That doesn’t matter. What matters is that I was almost found out by my friends because of how much I was not handling it. But entrusting my secret to one of them… I can deal with all my responsibilities without having to hide everything from everyone.”

“So you can tell some random person all about you and your guardianship but leave me, your partner, in the dark?”

“Sh-they aren’t random. I trust them with my life, just like I trust you with mine.”

“If you trust us the same, why can’t you tell me?”

“It’s safer this way,” Ladybug said, hugging her own arms together and looking away.

“I don’t understand how,” he replied. He sounded cross still, understandably so.

“That’s why I wanted to talk,” Ladybug continued, quietly. “I know… I know it’s not fair to you, Chat. I-“ She swallowed, trying to stop herself from shaking by squeezing her arms even tighter. It almost worked, but her voice picked up a slight quaver as she spoke. “There… there was a - a mission, not too long ago. Bunnyx - you remember her, right? She took me to the future. To solve a problem I had caused, since there was no one there to fix it.”

She paused, taking a moment to breath in the crisp evening air. She kept her gaze directly at Chat Noir’s feet, too nervous to look him in the eyes. “You had been akumatized there. In that future. The whole world was in ruins. Broken, flooded… there were no people. They were all just… stone. And dust.”

She heard Chat breath in sharply. She had to keep speaking, in case he cut her off.

“And akuma-you knew who I was. M-my civilian identity. That was my mistake - somehow something I did lead to you finding out and then somehow that lead to… to the end of the world. So-”

Warm arms wrapped around her. She instinctively stepped back - for just an instant - before leaning into the embrace. Tears escaped her eye that she didn’t realize was there.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Chat said, squeezing her tight.

“I had handled it,” she replied with conviction. She had done her job, making up for her mistake, and everything was fine now. Probably. “Plus, Bunnx told me its better the less you know about the future, so I thought you wouldn’t need to know.”

Chat pulled back, his hands on her shoulders, meeting her eyes. The anger from before had been replaced with concern, his eyes searching hers. His clawed finger reached up to wipe away a tear. Ladybug smiled at him, grabbing his hand with her own.

“It shouldn’t happen again,” she added. “The timeline is fixed. And I’m very sure those exact circumstances won’t happen again. But…”

“You’re worried that it could happen again if I know who you are.”

Ladybug nodded. Relief filled her; he understood. All her worrying about this conversation for nothing (or had all her practice made it better?) She squeezed his hand, smiling when she felt him squeeze back.

Chat Noir gave a deep sigh. Expecting more questions, he surprised her with a kiss upon her hand.

“Chat!” she said, though with very little actual malice as she pulled her arm away.

“I’m glad you told me about that. All of this, really,” he said.

“Me too. I’m sorry I have to keep so much from you.”

“It’s our way, I suppose.”

Ladybug wiped at her eyes, then did her best casual stretch. “Well. The way I see it, it’d only be fair if, um, you had a trustworthy civilian friend, that you could… talk to them about everything. If you wanted.”

Chat blinked rapidly. “What, like about being a superhero?”

“Exactly. Just in case everything had gotten too stressful for you, too. I don’t want to see you in the state I was in. And I trust your judgment.”

Chat smiled, though Ladybug wasn’t sure it reached his eyes. “I’ll keep that in mind. But I can manage just being a superhero with you, m’lady.”

She nodded, smiling back. “Okay. Thank you, kitty, for understanding.” She leaned over and gave him a quick peck on the cheek before throwing her yo-yo off in the distance.

“Bug out!”

#miraculous ladybug #miraculous ladybug spoilers #ml spoilers #ml fanfic #my writing #my fanfiction #panpear #miraculous ladybug fanfic #gang of secrets

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dogbearinggifts · 4 years

Note

I saw you mention in an ask that Diego spotted the abuse they underwent first. In what order and how do you think each of the kids came to the realization of what their dad put them through? They all obviously are still reeling from everything years later and it was EXTRA apparent during the light supper.

The light supper did many things, but the one thing it did most of all was show just how deeply he damaged these kids. Here they are in their thirties, meeting with a man who doesn’t know them yet—and even though they’re all completely on edge, guards up, expecting the worst, they’re still blindsided by how low he stoops just to gain a slight edge.

But I digress. Here’s how I think each one of them came to realize Reginald was abusive, and the order in which I think they realized it. This is mostly just speculation on my part, so I could be wrong, but I like to think it’s an educated guess.

Diego: Watching his dad give Luther nothing but praise while he received nothing but criticism fostered a good deal of resentment in him, but I think it also led him to see that something was very wrong much sooner than some of his other siblings. See, the torture they endured seems to have happened behind closed doors—Vanya losing her powers, Klaus being locked in the mausoleum, whatever awful things he did to Allison, Ben and Five in the guise of making them stronger—but the verbal abuse Diego went through happened out in the open. It had to. Reginald wanted to goad Diego into pushing his own limits to beat Luther at a game neither of them could win. To do that, he needed make them both aware that there was a competition, that Luther was winning and Diego was losing, and that all of the other siblings knew the score. Being locked in that dynamic meant Diego was constantly, painfully aware that no one else had to deal with Reginald’s constant nitpicking—but also that no one else was lavished with praise the way Luther was. Even to a sheltered kid who’s allowed few friends outside the family and limited freedom to leave the grounds, that treatment is visibly wrong. Diego might not have been able to call it abuse as a teen, but I think seeing the blatant discrepancies between how he and his siblings were treated—plus his legendary stubbornness—kept him from internalizing it for too long. When Reginald used Ben’s funeral to shame them all, that was probably the moment Diego began seeing him not as a bad parent, but as a monster he needed to escape.

Vanya: Like Diego, she was treated differently from her siblings. Unlike Diego, I do think she internalized it to a degree. We see her taking up the violin in an attempt to impress her dad (“I’m going to be extraordinary”) and her visible dismay when Reginald says “I’m afraid there’s nothing special about you.” Even as an adult, after years on her own, she sends Reginald a copy of her autobiography. It’s possible this was an attempt to get him to see things from her perspective, but it’s equally possible she sent it to him as a means of saying “Look, Dad, I wrote a book. I got it published. It’s on the bestseller list. Be impressed, you asshole.” Part of her wanted to impress him, and part of her believed that if she just tried a little harder, she could do it. Although she recognized that her treatment was unfair sometime in or prior to her teen years (we see her protesting Reginald’s refusal to let her be in the family photo) the part of her that wanted to earn his favor probably kept her from fully embracing the idea that she was not responsible for how she was treated. That said, I do think she’d realized Reginald was the problem by the time she moved out, and she probably began calling him abusive once she either read up on abusive relationships or learned about them from her therapist. Learning that there was a word for what she endured, and that no decent person considers it okay, was probably strangely comforting and empowering all at once.

Klaus and Ben: After Ben’s death, they almost certainly began talking more. Ben would’ve had to witness Klaus’ burgeoning addiction spiral out of control, and he wouldn’t have let it happen in silence. Maybe his resentment festered shortly after his death; maybe it came years later. Whatever the case, I think that when Ben began arguing with Klaus over his drug habit, Klaus pushed back—and eventually, this pushback led to him spilling details of what led him down that road. “He locked me in a fucking mausoleum when I was just a kid” probably stunned Ben into silence for a few hours at least—and also reminded him of the things Reginald forced him to do while he was alive. Maybe they started trading stories to empathize with each other; maybe they traded them to one-up each other. Whatever the case, I think that as they learned they’d both been effectively tortured by their own father, they both began to realize how twisted their childhoods had been—and that they were not to blame for it.

Allison: While her reactions during the light supper prove Reginald terrorized her as much as he did the others, we also know she used her power to get whatever she wanted. Parental abuse is damaging to everyone, no matter who you are; but abuse from a parent you can manipulate is a little easier to endure, and it’s much harder to recognize that something is wrong when you can buy yourself a respite—or at least a few material things to ease the pain. She had an advantage the others didn’t, and I think this advantage kept her in denial, believing Reginald might not be so bad after all, if he gave her all those nice things and didn’t complain, until Ben’s funeral. Watching Reginald use her brother’s death as an opportunity to berate and shame them for something she knows wasn’t their fault makes her angry and hurt enough to stand up to him, despite the derision this earns her. I think that day affected her pretty deeply—maybe even more deeply than her siblings. Ben’s funeral was probably the day she realized there was nothing redeemable in her dad after all and that she had to get away for her own safety. Once she was out on her own, I think she sought out books on bad parents—starting with survivor memoirs, empathizing with the narrators more strongly than she expected, then branching out into self-help. She probably read the signs and checklists over and over, just to make absolutely certain her experiences counted as abuse and she wasn’t just being dramatic and ungrateful.

Five: If he hadn’t gotten stuck in the apocalypse, I think he might have been one of the first to realize Reginald was abusive. But because he spent the majority of his life in a world much harsher than the Academy (which isn't to say the Academy wasn’t harsh, but no one had to eat cockroaches to survive it) his memories probably took on a rosier hue. A place with a solid roof over his head, where he was guaranteed clean clothes, companionship, and never had to wonder where his next meal was coming from—after starving out in the open and talking to a mannequin, Five probably thought more than once that he’d never argue with Reginald again if it only meant a return to those comforts he once took for granted. This longing, mixed with self-loathing over his stupidity at getting stuck, probably led to some self-blame over how Reginald treated him, if his “I was too hard on you” to Reginald during the light supper is any indication. He realized Reginald was abusive at some point (probably after some heated arguments with Dolores) but I think he’s also gotten it into his head that it wasn’t as bad as it seemed at the time—not as bad as growing up in the apocalypse, at any rate.

Luther: Not only did he stay in the Academy well into his twenties, but he put his own safety on the line, nearly died in service to Reginald’s goal—a goal he’d fooled himself into thinking was his own—and when the man who endangered him, mutilated him, and shunned him exiled him to a hunk of rock floating in space, he still blamed himself. While he took a major step forward in the latter half of S1, placing the blame for his pointless Moon mission on Reginald (where it belongs), I think his jump into the sixties caused him to regress a bit. I don’t think he forgot what Reginald did to him, but I do think he assumed that Reginald might be kinder in his younger years. Maybe he thought parenthood made him less patient or—more tragically—that something he and his siblings did turned him into the kind of man who would shame his surviving children at their brother’s funeral. I think he believed that if he could just talk to his dad before all of that happened, he’d be welcomed with surprise and joy, pulled into a hug and asked about all he’d accomplished. While Reginald’s rejection shattered him, I think it also, in a sad and twisted way, freed him. Luther learned, once and for all, that Reginald simply hated children. Reginald’s callousness and outright cruelty wasn’t due to anything he did—it was the result of taking on parenthood out of a sense of obligation, resenting it every step of the way, and lacking the emotional maturity to avoid taking it out on kids whose only crime was dependency on him. The fact Luther didn’t believe it until he heard it from the man himself speaks volumes about the control Reginald still had over him, even after his lies were laid bare.

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the-peachpit · 3 years

Text

Between the Lines

Ship: Shorter Wong x (Y/N)

Summary: Shorter and (y/n) are fighting about the future. (y/n) want’s to apologize, but what if Shorter can never forgive her?

Opening your laptop, you pick your favorite spotify playlist before looking around the room of the small apartment you shared with your boyfriend and friends. Hands on your hips you knew you were supposed to start packing but finding the best place to start was impossible. Every time one of your fingers so much as touched anything you were whisked away down memory lane. From shirts that you got when you first moved to New York planning to only stay for a year-it had been four- to the fake rose Shorter had bought for you the day you met. That memory took hold hard, mostly because of the disagreement you and Shorter had been passively aggressively maneuvering around for days. While living in New York you found a job in journalism, mostly freelance writing articles here and there. It wasn’t enough anymore to be some anonymous writer; you had seen your fair share of tragedy and a burning desire was lit deep in your chest to be more. Max- the man who had taken you under his wing- suggested you attend a college in California the degree could rally ramp up your career. At first the idea sounded nuts, the school was insanely expensive, and renting a town house was currently stretching you thin enough. Knowing Max came with a secret perk though he used contacts to get you in on a huge scholarship. Mostly because they could say the prodigy of Max Lobe- the man who took down New York’s biggest mafia family on a pedophilia scandal- was attending. Max gave you the news over dinner, and of course you wanted to go.

Laying back on the bed as Rose by Briston Maroney played you twirled the plastic rose in between your fingers. Shorter had given the rose the day he met you like a true fool who believed in love at first sight. Of course, you were skeptical and only believed in a player at first sight. If Eji, who you trust with your life, hadn’t vouched for him you never would have even entertained the idea. Rolling your eyes, you took the rose in a ha-ha sort of way. Shorter had taken it as a win and asked you on a date to his own restaurant. Twice you turned him down, it was the third time that did the trick. Though you had just been saved by him so that may have helped. You were shopping near China Town with Eji when the two of you were jumped and taken hostage. Eji was being used for ransom and your head was spinning. That was also the day you found out about the gang activity Ash and Shorter were a part of. It didn’t scare you like Shorter was afraid it would. Instead you accepted his date offer kind of asking him yourself.

He closed the restaurant down and it was just the two of you. Shorter hosted his own date taking you to your table, picking wine, cooking. He had the whole thing down, like he really had been planning it since the day you met.

Four years later here resting your hand back down on the sheets looking up at the ceiling. Shorter hadn’t come home for two days, Ash promised he was safe, but the last words Shorter had mumbled under his breath were ‘you wouldn’t make it out there,’ and you exploded it was the final straw as you screamed at him to leave. Shorter left without another word. You’d never screamed like that at him, he’s never stayed gone for so long with zero communication. Eyes darting around the room, you decided packing was impossible there were still two weeks till departure and that was more than enough time to put your life in a couple suitcases and leave everyone behind.

Walking downstairs the TV is playing softly and you know Eji is using it for noise. Catching him red handed in the kitchen you find him making himself a snack carefully cutting vegetables. Eji was the only reason anyone in the house didn’t live off pasta or Chinese food -courtesy of Shorter. Max helped balance their diets sometimes, but usually brought a lot of deserts with him. Not that anyone complained, Max really played the Dad role in the house. Eji was short with black hair and dark brown eyes. You never missed an opportunity to tease him about his height which he blamed on his Asian genes, until you bring up Shorter is in fact not short, and taller than Ash. That gets Eji red in the face, today though the spark wasn’t there. Instead you opted to swipe a cucumber from his cutting board.

Eji stopped cutting all together to put his hands on his hips, “It’s dangerous for you to just grab stuff like that while I’m cutting, (y/n).”

You laugh, “It’s not like you’re going to cut my fingers off. Or are you that clumsy?”

Eji resumed cutting, “Maybe it won’t be an accident, you did break one of my favorite photo frames.” He pointed the knife your way.

“Wait a minute, Ash is the one who threw the pillow!” You protest.

“You’re the one who tried to braid his hair while he was sleeping,” Eji brought up a smile creeping across his face.

“You knew his hair was getting long and you wanted to do the same thing. It looked cute!” You whine walking to the island leaning against the wooden top.

Eji laughed, he had a cute laugh that went up and octave, “He looked great, I tried to convince him to wear it that way.” He sighed, “Instead he had to go and cut it,” Eji whined.

Walking over Eji placed a plate of cut assorted vegetables and ranch. Picking up a carrot round you inspected it turning it between your fingers like the rose.

“Has Shorter bene home?” You ask hoping maybe he snuck in while you were gone.

Eji shook his head, “No.”

“Have you heard from him?” The desperation in your voice betrays you.

Eji shakes his head again without saying a word. The frown on the face gives it all away, he feels bad, he’s been in the situation of not knowing where his lover was. Sympathy radiates off him in waves as you bite into another carrot round and think about packing, or maybe not going at all.

Hearing the front door creak open your heart skips a beat as you look over, only slightly disappointed to watch a disgruntled blonde walk in. Running his fingers through his blonde locks Ash came up to the counter grabbing a slice of cucumber. About a million questions run through your brain at once, but you know he has something on his mind. He never walks in so silently; Ash is always sure to announce his presence as not to startle anyone into thinking it’s a break in. It’s an old habit everyone kept from when Ash was hunted down just a few short years ago. As much as you watched Ash, Eji, Sorter, hell even Max joke around, you knew the fear was still there. Harbored deep down.

Finally, Ash swallows and his green eyes won't dare connect with yours.

“I’m going to Coney Island for few days,” Ash announced.

Eji turned his face screwed immediately into worry, “When are we going?”

“You’re staying here,” Ash’s voice was firm, he’d made his decision.

Though if anyone was stubborn and could change the Lynx mind it was Eji.

“I’ll pack a bag,” Eji didn't take no for an answer.

Ash sighed, “Come on Eji, it’s an easy job, it’s just Arthur causing problems. Squashing him back down won’t take more than the weekend.”

“Going alone is stupid,” Eji crossed his arms officially meaning business.

“Do I ever go alone?”

Eji grunted.

“Look I’m going with, Cain,” Ash paused, “And Shorter.”

Your breath catches in your throat as you realize why he hasn’t looked at you since he got in. The air in the apartment changes tremendous tension at the name of the man with a purple mohawk.

“Is he coming here?” You ask.

“Sorry (y/n), I’m actually going to meet him in china town,” Ash played with the collar of his shirt.

You feel your guts twist the butterflies dying and anger filling your cheeks turning them red. You bang your fist against the countertop.

“Why!” You shout your voice echoing startling yourself.

Silence sits in the room, your own voice still echoing in your ears. Slowly you lay your head on the cool varnished wood.

“He can’t avoid me forever,” You mumble, “We have to talk about this.”

It didn’t sit right with you, to just let it fester any longer your heart was breaking already the thought of him just being angry with you. You wanted to understand why he was so upset with you leaving.

“Plus, I need to apologize,” You pick your head up, “I was out of line screaming at him to leave.”

Eji turned up his nose, “From what I heard he was just as much at fault.

You raise a brow towards Eji, “How much did you hear.”

Eji jumped a little, “I wasn’t eavesdropping,” he put his hands up in defense, “But I could hear you guys down the hall.”

Once again, the silence overtook the kitchen. You guys really had been properly arguing.

“I want to go,” You look at Ash trying to channel Eji’s determination.

“Neither of you are going,” Ash put his foot down, “It’s too dangerous.”

You stand up, “Seriously Eji’s been,” you’re cut off by a knife falling to the floor.

Looking over Eji is picking up the kitchen utensil apologizing. He keeps his dark eyes on the knife as he places back on the counter.

“If it’ll just take the weekend, we’ll see you Sunday night than,” Eji beamed his eyes closed.

Ash nodded crossing the threshold of the island hugging Eji tightly. You saw the way Eji’s dark eye’s looked dim as he returned the hug his face just popping over Ash’s shoulder. Without another word Ash walked upstairs presumably to his bedroom. You kept your eyes down on the wooden floor listening to the footsteps creaking across the little house.

“If I couldn’t get through to Ash this time there’s no way you could,” Eji leaned back against the counter.

“But he let you go on dangerous jobs all the time,” You finish your rebuttal.

“I knew you were going to bring that up,” Eji shook his head, “Ash did everything to keep me safe, he always told me to stay behind, but I never listened.”

“Sound’s about right,” You snicker not used to seeing Eji so serious and you weren’t sure what to say, “Why are you listening this time?”

“Because I think I know why he wants me to stay.”

“If you say because of me,” You point at Eji, “I’ll come over there and sock you.”

Eji stuck his tongue out at you, “Of course it’s you, but not you. More like imagine how Shorter would deal with it post argument, he couldn’t focus someone would get hurt. Besides you only caught the end of our adventure, you never saw what happened in the center, it was rough. Especially on Shorter and Ash.”

You feel your shoulders sag, he was right, you were there to help Max break the story. The last major part in the chaos you took part in was finding Ash in the library.

“Say goodbye to him for me,” You wave off Eji. You couldn’t stand to see Ash off currently.

Grabbing your coat off the hook you could practically feel Eji’s eyes boring holes in the back of your skull.

“I’m not going where you think I’m going,” You huff, “It’s purely coincidence.”

“(y/n),” Eji warns.

“I’m serious, call Max and ask,” You open the door and can hear the footsteps rushing down the hall.

Slamming the door for fun and out of spite and head towards the subway.

While waiting for the train you sit on a bench and pull out your phone realizing on a normal day you would have been long gone to work already. There’s no way you would have stumbled into Ash, Shorter would have slipped away without a trace. You could feel the anger rising in your gut, you had half a mind to go back and really give Ash what for. Every time you and Ash started a shouting match though somehow Eji would diffuse it-or Ash would win. Clenching your phone, you tap your foot angrily looking down the platform. Where the hell was the train, you wanted to get far away from the crazy-at least for a few hours.

“Mind if I sit here?”

You look up at a pair of dark eyes slightly covered by dark bangs a figure shorter than Eji standing there.

“What do you want Sing?” You sigh sitting back against the metal bench.

Sing take a seat next to you his signature smirk plastered across his face, “I was in the neighborhood, and Ash called asking me to find out if you were doing anything dumb.”

You had half a mind to at this point, “It’s not me it’s Shorter,” you cross your arms over your chest.

“Wow you guys really are fighting!” Sing looked like he was in awe.

“Oh good,” Your voice goes up an octave in sarcasm, “Everyone knows!”

“it’s hard not to,” Sing sticks his nose up, “Shorter’s been a real pain in the ass recently.”

You roll your eyes, “Tell me about it.” You look over catching Sing’s eyes and the two of you burst out into laughter.

You liked Sing he was a little younger than everyone else, but you could tell even while participating in gang activity he was growing up just fine. Always offering to walk you to see Shorter if he was too busy to leave the restaurant, and making you feel better when things with your gang leader boyfriend were tense and strained. Sing was easy to joke around with and didn’t treat you like an outsider of the tightly knit group that had formed. He believed in you 100 percent. The more you thought about it he was kind of like a cute little guard dog.

“Want some company wherever you’re going?”

“I don’t want to move you too far out of your way, I am going to Broadway to do paperwork for Max.”

Sing just waved you off, “I’m not doing anything anyway, I wasn’t invited to the shakedown.”

You snort and Sing started to gripe over the sound of the train pulling in. That was another thing about Sing, you knew he was capable, hell everyone did, but if they weren’t worried about protecting you or Eji -Sing was next on that list. Truly the little brother to the dynamic duo Shorter and Ash. One-time Sing had been late coming back from a drop off and Shorter was pacing the small livingroom practically pulling his purple hairs out. When Sing did show up Shorter was so mad, he hadn’t answered his phone. Turns out Sing had broken it and Ash bought him a new one the next day. Even as Sing insisted, he could pay for it.

Deciding to let Sing accompany you because it was better than riding alone to work the two of you swapped casual conversation about idle topics like tv shows or what new dishes Eji was trying.

“Man,” Sing leaned back while holding the brace bar, “You better bring me leftovers.”

You laughed, “Why don’t you just come over for dinner?”

Sing smiled and you’re reminded once again why you like talking to Sing so much. He was easy to talk to, he wasn’t as serious, he really brought your stress down a level. Sing stayed with you up until you got to the front of the small office building Max was operating out of.

“Thanks,” You wave as you start ascending the stairs.

“He’ll be fine after this weekend!” Sing shouted back.

You pause at the door looking back towards the bottom of the steps.

Sing gestures a thumbs up, “There’s no way Shorter will still be mad after a weekend away. I could already see his resolve crumbling when I talked to him earlier. He hates being away from you, and being angry,” he winked, “He’s kind of into you, but you didn’t hear it from me.”

You can feel the blush spreading through your cheeks as you giggle, “I won’t say a word.”

Dancing your way to the elevator clicking the button for the fifth floor you felt your heart fluttering in your chest. By the time Shorter was back you’d be packed, and everything would be fixed.

The elevator doors slid open and you met Max with a large smile even when he sheepishly presented you with a large stack of papers to proofread. The deadline was tight, and you knew you couldn’t give him an earful, he was the one getting you into a prestigious school, the work had to be done that day. It was a welcomed distraction as you sat at your desk and started knocking out articles.

It was nine o’clock when you finished and turning your brain off to Shorter had been the right move. Max drove you home asking about packing and giving you pointers for LA. You decided not to tell him about the drama, you’re not sure what he’d say. Though he was a married man you knew he had his own share of drama with his wife. Maybe you didn’t really want his advice.

Getting back to the small town house you see Eji sitting with the TV on watching an old movie, your dinner is int eh microwave. You already know how the night is going to go, it’s always the same when Ash and Shorter are out, dinner, snacks, movies, sticking close. The two of you may fall asleep on the couch, or in someone’s bed. You say nothing about what you think they may be doing, and you are each other’s company, there’s comfort in knowing someone is going through the same thing. Eji smiles and you know it’s hollow, he’s worried, you’re worried. You gently hold his hand and the weekend of silent hopes commences.

You’re practically bouncing off the walls Sunday night. You went with Eji to the store and started making a large meal that afternoon of the duo’s favorite foods. Unsure of Cain would be spending the night you guessed at what he might like.

“I’m inviting Sing,” You say already tapping on your phone.

The kitchen looked like a proper welcome home party with food, drinks, and a few decorations. There was a knock on the door, and you gestured for Sing to come in and make himself comfortable.

Around 11 o’clock you were starting to pace. You weren’t actually sure when they were getting in, hopefully sooner than later.

1 am was when you heard the first heavy footsteps coming down the hallway. The footsteps aren’t what woke you up though it was Eji getting off the couch jolting Sing awake. Slowly you adjusted to the bright lights you can’t believe you fell asleep with them on. Yawning and stretching the excitement of them coming home hasn’t hit you yet, your head is still fuzzy with sleep. Eji’s standing at the door like a puppy his hands clasped together patiently waiting with a sleepy smile on his face. For a moment it almost slips your mind why.

Crashing open the door seemed ready to burst from its hinges as everything moves too fast. Ash hobbled in leaning against Cain who had a strong grip around Ash’s waist. Eji was scrambling to Ash’s side while instructing Sing where the first aid kit was because you still hadn’t moved frozen to the couch. No wait- you were standing- when had you stood up? Eji was asking Cain what happened, but he sounded so far away, like his voice was coming through the walls. All at once the world that was chaotic and moving at lightning speed slowed. Sing ran back from the bathroom with the first aid kit, and you swore he was running through jell-o. Your feet moved, but you swore you hadn’t told them to. Padding across the hardwood floor in slip resistant kitten socks you push Eji to the side, your hands instinctively grab Ash’s collar. He lets you tug him down to meet your face. You feel hot and cold all at once as you stare into his dim green eyes.

“Where's Shorter?” You whisper simply.

Ash is silent Eji is grabbing your shoulder.

You shake the blonde haphazardly moving yourself more than him.

“Where’s Shorter!” You scream feeling the fat tears stream down your face.

“They got him,” Ash’s voice is hoarse.

“What do you mean they got him!” You can’t stop screaming.

“y/n” Eji’s voice still sounds like a faraway whisper.

“Arthur was a little more than we bargained for,” Cain answered gruffly, “Ash’s hurt pretty bad, Shorter let himself get chased and probably caught so we could get out.”

The tugging on your shoulder feels more forceful and you let yourself get pulled back releasing the death grip on Ash. Finger outlines kept his shirt collar pulled out. Stepping back further you let Eji and Sing attend to Ash and Cain in gentle calming voices. Sticking around to watch doesn’t sit right with you, and you can feel your stomach turning. Instead you run upstairs and enter your room. Slowly you close the door the air feeling like it was sucked out of the room right after. Shakily you put your hands over your mouth, your back sliding against the door. Crying on the floor next to the empty cardboard boxes that were never packed the room is too full- too full of Shorter.

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