#loving these fools a lot i hope they get more screen time in may
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UNHOLY ; jeongguk
pairing: jungkook x camgirl!reader
synopsis: “Aww, got you hard already?” — “Been hard since the end of your stream.”
genre: smut
warnings: squirting, overstimulation, teasing (like a lot), switch!jk and switch!reader, jungkook’s duality (yes. that has it’s own warning), tears of pleasure, interactive sex toy
word count: 1,9k
author’s note: finally!! it’s finished and it’s ready to be posted!! i hope you’ll like it 🫶🏻 (english is not my first language)
Should he open it?
What could possibly happend if he did, right?
Well let’s see.
He clicked the on the message and his jaw almost dropped to he ground.
Your phone number!?
No fucking way. You gave him your number! But why?
He didn’t even have time to think about the message when he noticed the little note that was attached to it. He read the note that said: ‘call me’. With a winking emoji
So he did.
He waited. For one minute, then two, then five. When he thought you were just making a fool of him and wanted to hang up on you, you suddenly appeared on his laptop screen.
You were wrapped in a towel and your hair was in a messy bun. Fresh out of the shower.
Fuck.
“Hey, Gukkie.” You said in the most seductive way possible. You were smirking in the camera looking and him up and down. He looked so fucking cute! With his big eyes staring at you and his lips slightly parted. You simply couldn’t believe that he was the man that was texting those sinful messages in your chat.
He gulped at the nickname, his palms started to get sweaty and his cock grew hard again. “Hi,” Was all he said, almost whispering. He looked so fucked out, his forehead still sweaty from the intense orgasm and his pupils were blown out. Truly a sight to look at.
You almost felt sorry for him, only if you could be there for him. Jerk him off, make him cum, make him feel so fucking good.
But that’s for a another time.
Now you have to focus on the present, on him.
“Don’t be nervous sweetheart.” You cooed leaning closer to the camera, giving him a peek into your cleavage. Which was still wet from the shower. His eyes widened and you saw his figure stiffen. Poor boy didn’t know what to do.
“Tell me Gukkie, what do you want hm?” You pleaded looking at him. He bit his lip wanting to say something but then shook his head. “I-I want you,” He whined, his hand slowly came to his cock, pumping himself teasingly slow.
“Aww, got you hard already?”
“Been hard since the end of your stream.”
You appreciated the honesty, other men you had would deny such a thing, playing hard to get or some dumb shit like that.
But Jeongguk was different.
He may look like a lost puppy right now but something in those eyes of his told you that if you were with him right now he would fuck you till the sunrise. At which you wouldn’t be mad about that at all quite the opposite you would love that.
You let your hair down and when your hand brushed against the towel it slipped down a little, but still was high enough for your gorgeous tits. You could see him hold his breath, even the slight movement of his hand! He was probably thinking about how slick he is, but no. You could see right through him.
“Does that feel good baby? Your hand around your cock? Fucking yourself?” You chuckled playing with the hem of the towel. “Y-Yeah so good,” He moaned throwing his head back.
“Stop.”
“Huh?”
“I said stop.”
His hand stopped immediately. How cute of him, listening to your every demand. "Wait right here okay?" He nodded and waited patiently.
You turned off your camera and muted your mic.
What?
He looked at the screen confused, wondering what could you be doing. His cock was still throbbing in his hand, angry red tip looking right at him. For how long does he have to wait again?
Oh, you didn't say. Great.
Now he was stuck here, horny. And you were nowhere to be seen. "Where the fuck did she go?" He whined again. Lying back and making himself more comfortable on the bed.
You on the other hand were panicking. You didn't prepare anything. Anything! Just as you were about to wash your hair he called. Talk about great timing.
Well, how could he know that you were showering? He doesn't live with you! You mentally scolded yourself. But now is not the time for that.
You had the hottest man waiting for you and you were panicking in your bedroom.
Okay, Y/n think quick. Would he mind if you were just in your silk nightgown? No, right? Right?!
You quickly went to your wardrobe and picked your red nightgown. That was only used for special occasions, like this one.
Perfect!
You put it on and on the way to your phone, you tried to fix the mess on your head called hair. When you took your phone in your hand you let out a big sigh of happiness. Thank fuck! He's still on the call. God is on your side today.
"Sorry, baby I had to do something" You turned on your camera and apologized. His eyes immediately looked at your figure, scanning you up and down. Then he looked behind you. He quickly noticed that you were in a different room in your bedroom where you filmed all your live streams.
Your bed was decorated with pink silky sheets and heart pillows, it suited you. Perfect princess bed for the most perfect princess. You noticed his eyes wandering behind you, looking behind you, then you noticed that your bed was in the frame. Oh, now it makes sense.
"Gukkie you here?" You smiled catching his attention. His eyes quickly found yours, getting lost in their beautiful color of them. Your eyes were so pretty, he loved them just like everything about you.
“Y-Yes I’m here,” He breathlessly said. Oh, how could he look so cute! “You think I’m cute?” He chuckled, smirking at you. Fuck, did you really say it out loud? Good job Y/n.
His innocent gaze was quickly replaced with something different, lust and hunger. Now, that kind of duality was hot. Hot as fuck.
“What do you think Jeonggukie? Hm?” You teased. Ha! Two can play that game. But only one can win.
“I think that if you were here with me right now I would fuck you as you deserve.” He confidently said, leaning closer to the camera slightly showing you his tattoed arm. Damn.
Who knew that the cute and innocent Jeon Jeongguk was such a flirt? Making you wet just by his words.
“And how do I deserve to be fucked?” You smiled playing with the strap of your nightgown.
“Like a slut.”
You looked at him, lips parted. The shock was visible on your face. You may or may not have an account where you posed and looked a like a total slut but you sure weren't one.
But for him.
You wouldn’t mind being a slut for him. Just one look at those delicious lips and sexy strong arms and you're on your knees. Giving him the blowjob of his life.
“Aw Gukkie, I would love that but, that’s not possible right now.” You pouted, letting the strap fall down your arm. His eyes darkened, and you swear you saw him clench his jaw. “Then let me make you cum just by my voice.”
“But I wanna see you too” You played with the second strap, fluttering your eyelashes at him. How could he resist you? Of course you can see him, all of him if you want to.
“Fine pretty you're the boss.” He sighed in defeat letting you take over.
Looks like you’ve won.
“Alright Gukk, position your laptop right, so I can see all of you,” You said and he immediately grabbed the screen and pulled it a little lower. He was quick with it. Positioning his laptop in a way where you could see his cute face and also his delicious dick.
“Looks like someone’s excited.” You smirked also adjusting your camera so he could see you. His eyes went to your tits, looking at the way your nipples hardened under the silk material. “Take it off, please.”
“Damn.”
“What Gukkie? Never seen a pair of tits?” You snickered when you saw his hungry gaze. He looked like he was in some kind of trance, all because of your tits. What’s he gonna do when he sees your pussy?
“You're so fucking hot.” He breathed, wrapping his hand around his cock again, you could see how it quickly hardened under his touch, almost too quickly. Poor Jeongguk, he’d been neglecting it for so long, he deserves a release.
You laid down on your bed and opened your legs for him, revealing your bare pussy which was now glistening with arousal, waiting to be fucked. “You're going to be the death of me,” He whined and threw his head back in pleasure, enjoying the movements of his hand and also the sight in front of him.
“Okay but let me make you cum first,” You chuckled and reached for your pink friend who was plugged into the charger. You quickly took it out and turned it on, the highest setting startled you a little. You reached for your phone to send Jeongguk a link to the app.
“Install it, baby, have your way with me,” You smiled and waited. In a few minutes, you felt a slight vibration against your palm. “Felt it?” He shyly asked.
“Hmmh” You breathed and dragged the vibrator down your body until it reached your clit. You expected Jeongguk to rapidly move his fingers against the screen of his phone but he didn’t, instead his fingers glided on the screen slowly and sensationally
“Does that feel good?” He asked, his hand doing quicker movements. He liked this, making himself feel good but also making you feel good. He felt some strange comfort in it.
“Gukkie!”
His bubble of thoughts bursted and his eyes searched for you. Your brows were furrowed and your thighs were shaking slightly. That's when he noticed that he was holding onto his phone screen for too long. He quickly put his hand away and look at you with an apologetic face.
“No, don’t stop. It felt so good. Please, please don’t stop.” You looked at him, then at his cock. He was about to climax soon and you were too. He can't leave you just like that.
You felt the familiar vibrations fast, very fast, and intense. Your eyes rolled back and you repeated his name like a mantra.
Jeongguk’s breath also got heavier and his cock started leaking little beads of cum.
At first it felt like you were entering heaven, white spots and stars were in your vision and you heard soft moans and cries of pleasure in the background.
You opened your eyes and noticed that your camera was soaked. Little droplets of your arousal were dripping from it. Then you noticed Jeongguk, he was breathless and you noticed the little tears that have stained his cheeks.
You both came together.
“Hey Koo, you alright?” You asked sitting in front of your camera looking at the display and seeing the adorable bunny. “I’m better than alright pretty” He smirked.
And his flirty persona was back again.
Just as you were about to take things further you heard knocking on your front door. You weren’t expecting anyone.
Oh.
It was the fucking pizza delivery guy, you totally forgot you ordered pizza for dinner tonight.
“Sorry, baby I gotta take it, talk to you soon hm?” You smiled and blew him a kiss.
The call ended.
And so did the amazing session you two had.
© 𝐉𝐄𝐎𝐍𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐈𝐎𝐔𝐒 2023. All rights reserved.
taglist: @taeluv13 @vsnnstuff @slid3er @jeonruby7 @Iloveleii
#𝐉𝐄𝐎𝐍𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐈𝐎𝐔𝐒#jeon jungkook#bts jungkook#bts jk#jeon jk#jungkook#jungkook smut#bts smut#jungkook x reader#jungkook fanfic#TheBTSWritersClub#bts fanfic#bts x reader#jungkook fic#bts fic#bts x y/n#bts x you#jungkook drabble#jungkook imagine
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જ⁀➴ 𝐊𝐈𝐒𝐒 𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐅𝐎𝐎𝐋 . . . (𝐆. 𝐑.)
— two things are definite: you like george, and george likes you. unfortunately, you two seem to be the only ones who don't see it.
+ part of my 'be my valentine' mixtape series ! love this song and i was so excited to use it for a george fic, so i hope you enjoy <3
“oh mate, you’re joking.”
“shut up!” george huffed, running the palm of his hand down his face in exasperation. “it was not that bad.”
he could defend himself all he liked, because in spite of that, george knew it really was.
this was possibly the third time this month that george had fumbled his chance to ask you out, and alex was beginning to grow tired of his friend’s constant pining and lingering stares.
“here’s what you’re gonna do,” alex said, his voice growing more serious as he looked george dead in the eyes. “you’re gonna ring y/n, and you’re gonna tell her you forgot something at her place. a shirt, socks, anything.”
"but i haven't?"
"not the point," alex groaned. "you're gonna tell her that, so you have an excuse to turn up there. this is your chance. don't be a stupid. tell her you think she's cool, that you like her, something to charm her."
george still wasn't convinced. his brows were pinched together as he ran over alex's plan in his mind, able to find a thousand different ways it could go wrong for him.
"right. and what happens when she realises that i haven't actually left anything there, and i just look like a massive twat for showing up?"
alex wasn't sure that he could take any more.
"mate, you can't just sit around and wait for some sort of fairy tale ending to come out of nowhere for you. at some point, you're just going to have to confess to her."
though he was being assertive, alex was still trying to be supportive, laying a hand on george's shoulder and delivering a friendly pat of encouragement.
"i can promise you she's probably thinking the exact same thing right now, anyways."
george scoffed, his answer hanging in the air unspoken. as if.
unbeknownst to george, alex was a lot closer to the truth than even he may have realised.
the events of the afternoon were playing on a loop in your mind as you tried to dissect every last piece of your interaction with george, from how he'd greeted you - a brief side hug and a smile - to how he'd said goodbye - a weak effort to get you to stay and a silly, yet endearing, wave.
was this your life now? driving yourself mad over even the smallest little details, all because of some stupid feelings?
when you'd first started developing somewhat of a crush on the mercedes driver, you made a promise to yourself that it would never become a thing. and you had kept that promise for roughly four months, until you made a huge error: revealing your feelings to someone else.
ever since you had let it slip to a friend that you actually quite liked george in ways that far surpassed the platonic label, you'd been - for lack of a better phrase - absolutely fucked.
now you had people to fuel your delusions, try to convince you that george had to feel the same way, and no, of course he wasn't just being polite when he offered you his jacket, you fool. outside interference and reassurance should have made you more confident in your feelings, maybe even push you to confess, but instead they'd had the opposite effect.
the weight of the word 'hopeless' in hopeless romantic had really started to resonate with you. though you weren't allowed to dwell on your misfortunes for too long.
some may have chalked it up to fate, some may have attributed it to a divine power wanting to laugh at a poor mortal, but whatever the reason, your phone rang with an incoming call from george.
the stupid candid photo you’d taken as a contact picture flashed up on your screen, and the automatic smile that painted your lips made you want to yell in frustration.
"y/n, hi!"
pathetic was the perfect word to describe you, thanks to how utterly gone you were for george, as the mere sound of your name leaving his lips was enough to make your heart jump.
"sorry, know i only saw you a few hours ago, but i just remembered that i think i left one of my mercedes shirts at yours when i was there the other day."
you didn't even think twice about it, why would you? george had left countless items at your place in the past, and he would leave more in the future.
"no problem. y'can always come by and get it, i'll try and grab it for you."
george's chest ached at how ready to help you were.
"yeah? you're a lifesaver, y/n, really. i'll set off now, should be there in about fifteen minutes."
brief 'see you later's were exchanged, and the moment you set your phone down onto the coffee table, your hunt began.
you didn't recall seeing one of george's shirts anywhere around, but previous mishaps had enlightened you to the fact that things could turn up anywhere. you'd thought that the shoes buried right underneath your bed were odd, until a sock turned up in your bread bin a few weeks later.
nothing was off limits anymore.
yet, somehow, no matter where you looked, you couldn't find the fucking shirt. frustration slowly nibbled at your mind, the sound of a knock being the only thing to break you from your frantic search.
an annoyingly attractive george russell greeted you when you swung open the front door.
in all of the years he'd known you, george thought this was the most adorable you'd looked.
your hair was in disarray, the strands unkempt as though you'd been running your hands through it over and over again. your face shone a little, and you were clearly a little out of breath, if the small, panting gasps you took were anything to go by.
your apartment was a mess, and george quickly realised that you'd turned your entire place practically upside down to try and find a shirt that wasn't even there in the first place.
guilt began to bubble up in his throat, and george hoped that, after today, it would all be worth it. he only had one chance, and he wasn't going to fuck it up.
before he could allow doubt to creep into his mind and sow seeds of regret, george lifted a hand to cup your jaw. the feeling of your soft skin against his palm elicited a gasp to slip from his mouth. the parting of his lips provided you with the perfect opportunity to meld your lips together in a chaste, sweet kiss.
feelings went unspoken, for now. time would grant you the chance to properly word every last affection you harboured for one another at a later date.
besides, george was a firm believer that actions spoke louder than words, and this kiss was living proof.
george forced himself to pull back, his forehead resting against your own, and he believed that to die like this would be a blessed fate. because you were definitely going to kill him when you found out the truth.
"i lied, by the way. there was no shirt," he mumbled, blue eyes meeting yours with a wince.
"you fucking dick."
#.° ༘🗝️⋆₊ becca’s drabbles#𐙚˙⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 becca's 'be my valentine' special#george russell#george russell x reader#george russell x you#f1 x reader#formula one x reader#f1 x you#formula one x you
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it may be sudden of me, but i've had an idea i've forgotten to bring to light in the server or to anyone else
miguel 'n reader are engaged, and we catch the man sorrowful and doubtful of *himself* because he thinks he won't do a good job. we let him ramble on and on until we have to shut him up with a kiss ^^
just thought it'd be really sweet, esp if we comfort and reassure him after his rambling
don't do a friends first kinda deal, do reqs that you like that came before mine first if you have a lot! and dw about doing mine at all 💃
(if you do tysm)
YURI MY BOOOOOO omg i'm SO SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG FOR ME TO GET TO YOU 😭😭😭 BUT I LOVE THIS IDEA AKDNDJDLKDKDKD i wanna do this justice. I HOPE YOU LIKE IT AAAAAA
(reblogs are greatly appreciated, it helps get my content out there! if you guys like what you see, please reblog it too <:D)
i just want us to be okay. — miguel o'hara x reader
you didn't need to think twice when he asked you if you'd marry him, you'd've been a fool to have lied to him about how you felt; but you ended up an even bigger, more lovesick fool than ever when you kept repeating to yourself this: i'm getting married to the man of my dreams. you would never forget the way his eyes watered up, how his smile seemed to brighten the whole place up just a little bit in your eyes when you said yes, the saccharine laughter that rang in your ears as he kept asking you in a bewildered, awestruck voice if you really meant to say 'yes' to being his spouse, his spouse.
and up to this day, he can't stop asking you if you mean it; he is that smitten and enamored with you, he can't believe that personified perfection agreed to share their life with him.
however, it's due to that disbelief, that urge he has to think that nothing good in his life will last—that your love is merely temporary, that the universe will one day inevitably rip you away from him like nearly everyone he ever truly cared for in his life—that this affectionate him right now won't be around forever. he's scared that if he makes one wrong move, says one wrong thing, takes one look at the wrong direction—he'll lose you forever. and in a way... he feels like he deserves it, that he deserves to lose you.
he's been holed up in his office, brooding in the dark and thinking to himself in silence as the images and videos on his monitors play by without him looking up to acknowledge what's happening on the screens. he whispers to lyla to play footage of the two of you dancing at your friend's wedding, specifically to the timestamp when you two had your first dance as a couple at the reception hall's dance floor. he heard your voice and laughter, as sonorous and melodic as it was the evening he held you in his arms. it certainly wasn't the first time he held you, but it was the first time he held you with a great feeling in his chest, one that couldn't be labelled nor replicated by any other feeling in the world—it was the first time he held you knowing that his life and yours were going to be one, you two are each other's, like your friend, you two would have your happily ever after one day.
he smiled to himself, much like how he smiled on the video; and he repeated the same words he uttered that night when you chuckled to yourself nervously. "i feel so... weird and nervous having all these eyes on me. is it obvious?" "oh, very." he teased you, mouthing the words out with a wide grin as he watched the footage back with a smile, chuckling as he heard you laugh at his smart ass quips and sarcastic remarks. he missed how sweet your laugh was, how adorable you got when you pretended to be angry at his little comments. "this isn't even our wedding, but, gosh... i can't imagine how it'd be like if it was ours, it's so... so intimidating..." you muttered to him as you held his hand and shoulder tighter, with your feet nearly stumbling and wobbling out of sheer embarrassment.
miguel smiled wider as he watched himself sigh and place his hands underneath your chin, turning your head to make you look at him. "cariño, you're perfect as you are already. even if you're... a nervous mess, i'm falling deeper in love with you when i see you this vulnerable, this honest, really." he said as he leaned in to kiss you, with your eyes gazing up into his mahogany brown ones. the clip was paused in the middle of the kiss scene since a guest had knocked on miguel's office door. "is that during my friend's wedding night?" you asked him with a big smile as miguel's face got all flustered and he closed the monitor, shaking his head. "huh, what friend, what wedding night?" he asked you rapidly as you stifled a laugh. "you're not that slick, miggy." you told him as he rubbed the back of his neck and awkwardly grinned at you. "that's my fatal flaw." he admitted with a chuckle as you held his other hand in your own.
"why were you watching it, miggy? too excited for our own wedding night? can't wait to dance with me?" you asked him with a glimmer in your eyes. miguel cleared his throat and looked away from you and off into the dark distance of his room, his eyes scanning the surroundings, not really looking for anything in particular, but merely wanting to look at anything but you, because... he didn't know how to tell you the words that he wanted to release from his mouth right now. he sighed and decided that, since you were going to be his spouse soon anyway, better yet he be honest and confess to you right now his anxieties.
"well, um, i... you could say i'm excited, yes, but... i'm a little scared." he admitted in a hushed voice as he felt your grip tighten around his hand. "do tell me about it, i won't judge." you told him in a soft tone as miguel smiled a little and shook his head. "oh, where to begin?" he asked himself as he rubbed his forehead and took in a deep breath. miguel went on to describe his worries about being the perfect husband, if he could even fulfil the role of being your lover, your husband; if you'd have even the slightest regrets about marrying him... it's these irrepressible, negative thoughts of his that hinders him from enjoying the time he has with you, because he can barely enjoy time with himself.
"i just... want to be enough for you, you know that..." he said as he held your hand back and squeezed your hand slightly. he sighed again as he thought he just bummed you out and made you see just how weak he really was when it came to the things and people that really mattered to him in his life. "i'm sorry, it's really pathetic, isn't it?" he asked you with a slight chuckle, which was soon broken by you suddenly leaning over and planting a kiss on his lips. it was short; a brief kiss, though one that pulled miguel out of his self-deprecating trance for a minute to listen to you. "i'm going to marry a man who loves me and is self-assured that he loves me; i'm not going to marry this handsome impostor who doesn't even know if he thinks he's enough for me, he is, has, and always will be." you said with a loving smile as you placed both of your hands on either sides of his face.
miguel's eyes soften as he gazes back into your own eyes, filled with love and slight sympathy for him; you have no idea what it's like to be in those big shoes he has to fill, and you won't pretend you have all the answers, that you know everything, but you can guarantee him that as his lover, best friend, and future spouse--you will definitely be there for him, come rain or shine. you pulled him in for another kiss, which felt more passionate and longer than the previous one. as you pulled away, miguel not only appeared more flustered, but he appeared to be more... in awe of you. he nodded and covered his lips, which he kept parting and bringing together over and over in an effort to say something, anything to thank you for your words, your assurance, because he needs that more than you will ever know.
he returned the favor by wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you in for another, more dramatic, kiss. his eyelids fluttered open after he kissed you and he smiled as he gazed at your beautiful, bashful face. "i'm really marrying you, huh? how did i... how did i get so lucky?" he asked you as you smiled and kissed him again, leaving him unanswered, but thoroughly happy and satisfied with you and all the love and comfort you had for him, with plenty more in store when you two were finally to be wedded.
tags !! @miguelswifey04 @binibinileonara @fiannee @fictarian @yuridopted0 @arachnoia @meeom @ophanimgold @melovetitties
#miguel o'hara#miguel o'hara x reader#miguel o'hara x you#miguel o'hara x y/n#miguel o'hara fluff#miguel o'hara fanfiction#spiderman 2099#atsv#atsv fluff#atsv imagines#atsv x reader#atsv x you#atsv x y/n#spiderverse#across the spiderverse#spiderman across the spiderverse#spiderman across the spiderverse x reader#spiderman across the spiderverse fluff
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Feel special
✰ pairing : Im Nayeon x Fem!reader
✰ summary : You confess your feelings to your bestfriend , the girl who always makes you feel special
✰ genre : fluff
✰ warnings : use of pet name ( love ) and nothing else i think ( please tell me if i forgot anything )
✰ word count : 0.9k and some changes
✰ a/n : i found this yesterday , when i was erasing some of my notes , so i changed some things and decided to post it :) btw if there are mistakes please ignore them , thank you.
You weren't sure why, but you felt different around her. You felt cherished. You felt special.
You were also aware of the slim to none probability that Nayeon would like you back
You weren't blind. Even though she didn't have many friends , you could see how distant observers look at her.
You first met her when you started college two years ago, and you recall it like it was yesterday.
You've always thought of her as a good friend, and you consider her to be your best friend. Maybe she doesn't think of you as her best friend, but that doesn't really matter to you.
You never considered confessing to her until now. Every time this thought entered your mind, you would shake it off and tell yourself that you have plenty of time to confess, but now that you think about it, you regret not doing so sooner.
You are waiting for Nayeon with a bouquet of flowers behind your back, ready to surprise her. You asked her yesterday if she could meet you behind the college after her classes were finished. You see her , after a few minutes of waiting. She was wearing her beautiful smile, which lit up her face. When a thought occurred to you, she was getting closer, and you could feel your emotions rising. What if Nayeon doesn't like you back? Will you maintain your friendship? or will things get weird and you two will no longer be friends? You'll find out whether she likes you or not soon, because Nayeon is getting closer and closer and in a few seconds she is right in front of you.
"Hello," she says, her smile still on her face.
"Hey" you say back , but unlike her you're not smiling "How was your day? " you ask her
"It was good, but now that I've got to see you, it's a lot better" you feel butterflies in your stomach with just a few words. "How was your day?" she questions , her gaze fixed on your face.
You wanted to tell her the truth. You wanted to tell her how nervous you were all day, especially now, as you're about to confess to her. However, you did not. "It was fantastic! But I'm glad I saw you because I need to talk to you about something very important" You answer her question, and with each word you say, she becomes more curious. "Go ahead," she encourages with a small hand gesture.
You show her the bouquet of flowers you've been carrying behind your back all this time and decide to get right to the point.
"Nayeon , I know what I'm about to say may seem ridiculous to you, but I like you. I've liked you for a while now, and I understand if you don't, but I really want to tell you about my feelings. Even if I'm having a bad day, when I see your name appear on my phone's screen , I start smiling like an idiot. When you look at me and smile, as you did a few minutes ago, my heart begins to beat at an unbelievable rate, and when you tell me how much you missed me I find myself smiling like a fool again." You take a short break to catch your breath, and you notice Nayeon staring straight into your eyes without saying anything, her smile not present on her face anymore so you take the opportunity to put the cherry on top. " It's you. You make me feel special." And with that you take a deep breath and push the bouquet towards Nayeon , hoping she'll accept it.
To be honest, you were worried about making Nayeon uncomfortable, but you also knew that if you did, she would stop you halfway through your speech and tell you so. After a few awkward seconds of silence, Nayeon takes the bouquet into her arms and holds it up to her nose to smell it. She lowers it, smiles at it, and then looks you in the eyes.
"I'm glad you finally said it," she says blankly, but her smile remains.
"What do you mean?" you inquire. Did she knew you were in love with her?
"What I mean is" she says as she takes a step closer to you "that if you didn't confess soon, I was about to take the first step."
So she knew. She was aware of how much you liked her, but she never teased you about it. She pretended she had no idea.
"How did you find out?" You ask her, even though you're fairly certain your friend, Sana, told her.
"Sana told me a while ago." she responds to your question, and you manage to suppres your laugh. Of course she did.
"Did she approach you and tell you about it, or?" Even though you wanted to, you were embarrassed to continue the sentence.
"Or what? Finish you sentence love".
You checks go red at that nickname. And also , you genuinely believe she understood what you meant, but this is just how she is.
"Or did you ask her about it?" After what seemed like a decade, you finally manage to say
"To be honest, I did ask her." That was all she said, but her words made your heart race once again
"Would you mind if I kissed you in that case?" You'd never asked someone that before, and it made you feel kind of awkward.
"If you insist."
#kpop#twice#nayeon#im nayeon#nayeon x reader#im nayeon x reader#twice x reader#twice fluff#nayeon fluff#fluff#kpop fluff#writing#sm1leflower
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Our beloved V and her love
Players have been looking at the world from V's perspective. Valerie is the observer who brings our eyes. We see the story of many characters, but we have less opportunity to observe our girl. Perhaps it is easy to be less sensitive to many of her behaviors and emotions, since we have been long used to seeing those options as a means to serve the plot of the game. However, if we do not take it all for granted, but think deep inside the logic behind with some of our subjective initiative, we will realize that the johnny/v relationship from V's perspective may be a perfect example of "showing instead of telling".
Valerie seems to be more accustomed to show her love and care to others. She is the one always offering a helping hand in her established relationship. You can say this is a coincidence caused by the characteristics of the first-person RPG, but in any case, the result is that she is relatively more introverted in various relationships. She listens instead of telling. It's more like everyone needs her than she needs them [born to be a merc, don't you think?]. She listens to everyone's troubles and solves all kinds of problems, but she seldom easily shows her vulnerability until she has to. Even if she decides not to hide the sad truth from her friends, she rarely asks for support directly. What she says more is "It's okay." or "I feel better now. No worries." or "I've found a way. Hope it works". This is what I find most endearing and remarkable about our girl - the main storyline is her plight. She is dying. Her life is counting down. She is the one who needs help. But beyond that, dozens of side jobs are basically about her pulling others out of the shadows, out of the mire, and into a new life. Imagine a patient with terminal cancer who is still doing psychological therapy for others, and you will find that she is so strong and brave, and so good at pretending; that she can even fool the group of strangers behind the screen who think they know her best. The new legend in NC that we knew doesn't even know how to escape the scythe of death.
This is where it gets interesting. With Valerie, we visited Judy's hometown flooded by the reservoir. We met the family members who are dependent on River. We understand the past of Panam and Aldecados. And we know very well the years of light and gloom of Kerry.
The problem is, we don't know much about V. We have only a one-sided perception of her life. Again, you can say that this is the beauty of first-person RPGs! Leaving enough room for the player's imagination! We can totally make up our story for our V. But the objective truth is that our knowledge of V's memory in the game is from the prologue and some seperated side jobs about her background (i.e., street kid/corpo/nomad). In addition, what we get is only fragments of her childhood that she dictated to herself, and Johnny's words.
Yes. Johnny's words describing the first half of V's life.
The man is the closest obeserver of V.
V: "Sure seem to know a lot about my past."
Johnny:"Well, seen flashes of your past, just like you've seen flashes of mine."
That's what makes their relationship so special. Valerie rarely reveals her past voluntarily and shows her thoughts, but whether she wants it or not, she has a partner who shares these secrets with her and is as close to her as her sense of self. I have to mention her time with the joytoys in the clouds that connects her subconscious. In fact, if we talk to the end, we will find that it is very much like a simple conversation she had with Johnny back in the Tapeworm. Angel and the Sky have slightly different lines, but they both end with the phrase "If you must kill, kill. If you must burn all the world to the ground, then let it burn.", I don't think this is an echo without any particular purposes.
So for Valerie, the relationship with Johnny is different from her other intimate relationships. In the dialogue with Johnny we can see Valerie releasing her various emotions to the greatest extent possible. She rarely comes across as the strong and reliable merc who seems to be powerful and always makes people feel safe. On the contrary, in Tapeworm and Chippin' In, we can see V show her vulnerability and sensitivity while changing Johnny. She often expresses her confusion and anger. She no longer says "I found a way". She asks "what do you want". She can be confused, fearful of death, and greedy for life. she becomes a resentful and incomprehensible about the city and her fate. She becomes an ordinary young person, resentful and uncomprehending about the city and her fate. Johnny knows her past like he knows the back of his hand. He knows everything she cares about most and the root of all her fears. He listens to her, understands her and even stubbornly decides to save her. He keeps asking her forcefully to accept his help and reminds her after the meaningful concert that "Kerry's got his life back. Whereas we should be worryin' about how to get yours back". So Mr. Pondsmith, the original author of the board game, is right in saying that because of Johnny's presence, V was cushioned before she had a nervous breakdown and became a cyber psychopath.
Such companionship and closeness would be like painkillers. Perhaps V is unconscious to herself, but she has developed dependence long before she realizes. Her subconscious habit of defending him would have been able to show her subtle preference. Before she knew it, Johnny was already a source of security. No matter how much she usually argued with him and said she didn't want to hear him anymore, her subconscious was looking for him at the most fearful and uncomfortable times.
When V first accessed the cyberspace in the Pacifica with the Voodoo Boys, she uneasily seeked confirmation from Johnny as she stepped into the biting cold water. And before she had a near-death experience of that time of unconsciousness, she fell to the ground and called out Johnny's name, saying in her mind that she was going to die, until he held her wrist and said she ain't dying yet cuz he got her. It is said that people are most honest when they are dying. Did Valerie find her true feelings about him at that time? Did she realize that she only wanted to rely on this pure solace of the heart, despite all the friends she had met, despite knowing that Johnny could not technically and literally offer her a hand in the material world?
Maybe that's why she gave that answer when Johnny asked her if she would take a bullet for him.
The Johnny in her head is just a mass of data, a phantom, and a copy of the engram. Everyone including Johnny knows this, and Valerie reminds herself of this fact from time to time, but she still believes in the end that he is a part of her soul, a comrade who will accompany her to the end. The kitten (Nibbles) they picked up together was real, the tattoos he left on her arm were real, and so were his dog tags and his promises.
Valerie's desire to live is so strong, but in the most ideal development path of the plot, even if she had to endure the suffer because of the RELIC, she didn't even take much of tablet to block him out until the final rooftop choice. Could it be that she would rather endure physical pain than experience sudden loneliness and isolation on a spiritual level? She emphasizes her control over her body, yet she swallows Endotrizine for him again and again to fulfill his last wish when she knows she is getting closer to death. Why could she trust a man who was destined to take her life? Why can you trust someone who has shown all his "previous conviction" to her, someone she knows is a jerk in the past?
Only Valerie knows why.
In the deleted dialogue, Hellman says that she, letting Johnny control her body, is like a young girl in love and doesn't care anything else (I dont know the original lines in English but I do see the line in the Chinese ver voice package). In the end of the secret ending, Rogue said that Johnny must have made a pretty big impression on V for getting on board. The truth is it's hard for an outsider to really understand what it's like to have someone so close in spirit.
It's never the same thing as "Let's try. We can break up if it doesn't work out". Once that "you're in me, and I'm in you" state is confirmed, she can't get out of it - unless she denies herself. As long as she can't let go of herself, she can't let go of him. She's willing to give to him as much as she's willing to give to herself.
So even at the end of the six months Valerie has left to live, she will feel that she can't hear him anymore and can't see him anymore, but she will never lose him. There will always be a part of her soul that belongs to him. Maybe she will listen to his songs, holding all the traces of him left behind and missing him without a word, because no one can understand.
She will only tell them that she just got used to him.
#silverv#johnny silverhand#female v#johnny x v#johnny silverhand x v#cyberpunk2077#cp2077#cp77#some meta stuff#just some personal understandings#I love this ship#OTP silverv
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Kaiju Week in Review (March 26-April 1, 2023)
Sadao Iizuka died on March 24 at the age of 88. One of the last living links to the first Godzilla film, he had an incredibly prolific career in tokusatsu as an optical artist, with his work including Godzilla's atomic breath, King Ghidorah's gravity beams, and Ultraman's specium ray. Most of his work on Toho kaiju films was in the Showa era, but he also contributed animation to every one from 1993 to 1997, plus Final Wars and, believe it or not, Shin Ultraman. Rest in peace.
If you'd like to learn more about his career, Brett Homenick published a couple of very expansive interviews here and here.
Chibi Godzilla Raids Again premiered on April Fools Day with a lot of bickering between the worldly Chibi Mechagodzilla and the sweet Chibi Godzilla. No official translation yet, but fellow Wikizilla bureaucrat Les went through the on-screen captions to write a lengthy summary.
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Godziban is celebrating Godzilla vs. Megalon's 50th with a multipart episode, the first installment of which also went up on April Fools' Day. The Three Godzilla Brothers get the filmmaking itch again, and Gigan and Megalon are as gloriously dumb as ever.
Kamen Rider and Man Spider—sorry, "Masked Rider" and "Kumo Augment"—have joined Godzilla Battle Line. With this, every lead from the Shin Japan Heroes Universe is part of the game, making it one of the most elaborate Godzilla crossovers ever (remember, Kong's there too). I doubt Rider actually becomes kaiju-sized in Shin Kamen Rider, but there is some precedent for it. Both units are apparently game-changers too.
Penguin will be publishing a Godzilla picture book the day after Christmas by Olivia Luchini, titled Love from Godzilla. No cover yet, but here's the description:
Share the love with Godzilla! This hardcover gift book, complete with monstrously adorable illustrations of everyone’s favorite kaijus, is perfect for that special someone.
Sick of the Skull Island cartoon taking forever to come out? Make your own story. Evil Genius Games has opened preorders for its Kong: Skull Island Cinematic Adventure RPG, to be released on June 1, although you can buy the PDF right now. As someone whose introduction to tabletop RPGs was Toho Kingdom's D20 section, I'm beyond thrilled, not the least because the book thanks Wikizilla and our resident King Kong expert, The Boy Who Cried Godzilla. And as you can see, there are some new monsters in the mix.
Preorders are also open for their Pacific Rim RPG; same release date. They're hoping to expand on both via crowdfunding; the Kickstarter starts May 9.
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Bandai released a short, baffling video about an unspecified Shin Japan Heroes Universe project on April Fools' Day. Very suspicious timing, but there's nothing in here that really reads as a prank; this crossover has been around for a while now. Cool animation too.
Toho didn't do anything Godzilla-related for 4/1 this year, probably to avoid upstaging the shows that released actual episodes that day. But I did write a Wikizilla article on past pranks if you'd like a stroll down memory lane.
#kaiju week in review#sadao iizuka#chibi godzilla raids again#shin japan heroes universe#godzilla battle line#godziban#godzilla#kong skull island#love for godzilla#shin kamen rider#kamen rider#king kong#kaiju
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seeing the words Not In The Groove in your comment made me gasp irl i love that game its such a damn banger
have this gif its funny i think
Always happy to see another NotITG fan! It's truly criminal how few people know about this game. And I've been meaning to learn the chart in that gif for a while. Maybe soon 🤔
Also, this means I now have an excuse to yell about this game to the sorry fools who made the mistake of following me. So...
(Moderate photosensitivity warning btw, this stuff can get spicy for the eyes)
HYPERFIXATION BE UPON YE
I now get the chance to talk about a game I feel exceedingly n̸͓̒̍o̶̹̿͠r̷͚͇͗m̴͈͒̐a̸̝͉̒ĺ̶̹̹̆about.
What's NotITG??
Not In The Groove, or NotITG/nITG for short, is a rhythm game with some of the craziest & most creative visuals you'll ever see. It's an extravaganza of colors, music, and lots and lots of arrows. Words don't do it justice though, so here's an example:
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(HiTECH NINJA - Technician's High)
(Chart by Exschwasion + Tetaes)
Whoa, what the fuck was that? Is that even readable?
Yes it is, I promise! It just takes some practice. These are made to be not only doable, but completely feasible to read & learn. They wouldn't be fun otherwise. It's also not nearly as bad as it looks at first glance, especially if you know what sort of stuff you should be looking out for.
In fact, here are some things that can make it a little easier to parse:
The colors of the arrows are indicative of the timing (reds are on quarter notes, blues are eighth notes, greens are sixteenth notes, etc). This means it's possible to identify the rhythm of a song even if you've never heard it before.
If visual effects are getting particularly crazy, it can be helpful to read ahead and quickly memorize a "chunk" of notes to play while your vision is impaired, picking back up when the screen is clearer.
Charts (the arrows for a given song) are made to be played on a dance pad, with your feet. Furthermore, any half-decent chart commits to having good flow (or posture) meaning that the patterns you see are made to be "stepped" through with alternating* feet. This vastly limits the number of possible patterns that can be thrown at you. So if you happen to lose your place while reading the chart, it's very feasible to infer what the next few steps will be, giving you a chance to recover.
(*depending on the song, a chart may have you hit the same step multiple times with the same foot. There are other exceptions too but that could warrant its own section entirely)
If you want a way better explanation of this stuff, some prominent devs in the community did a great job covering all of it during the game's exhibition during AGDQ2022!
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This looks completely and utterly insane, there's no way I'd ever be able to play this!
That's where you're wrong, bucko! They aren't all made to be difficult! There are plenty of easier charts out there to learn the basics on & get your bearings. Some of my favorites include:
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(Chroma - Phantom Train Journey)
(Chart by Kaypooma)
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(Sakuzyo - Altale)
(Chart by PlasticRainbow + mrcool909090)
How do these even get made?
Good old programming! Also math. Lots and lots of math. You wanna make the arrow follow a funny path? Time to learn what a spline is. Want to make a circle? Hope you were paying attention in trig class, because it's time to break out the radians.
In all seriousness, I have nothing but the highest respect for the people that make charts for NotITG. Every single one of them is a culmination of music, art, programming, math, animation, visual design, game design, psychology, kinesiology and so, so much more. It's genuinely dizzying how multitalented these people are.
I'm interested in these man-made horrors beyond my comprehension! Where can I play this game?
You can download it from the game's website: noti.tg. It's free! Completely! There is no way to spend money on it. You'll just have to live with the fact that you can't give these talented creators your money.
I'd also recommend joining the game's discord (noti.tg/discord). They're incredibly helpful & friendly, just don't be a jerk :p. It should have some good information & resources for when you're starting out.
I feel like I've barely even scratched the surface of what makes this game special. I could probably make a whole other post rambling about the lore of UKSRT and the effect that's had on me, but this post is long enough as is.
If there's even one person who read this far, thank you for listening to the ramblings of a madman obsessed with a funny little arrow game! ❤️
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A Sweeter Place
It was raining today and then I was feeling all so soft so yes softie hyunjin :(
♡♡♡
Hyunjin x fem!reader
Genre: slight angst
Warnings: established relationship; mentioned phobia of thunder and loud sounds; making out; marking
Word count: 1.0k
12:22 am
It began as a whisper in the air as the drops slowly rolled down the window glass as you sat by it staring up at the sky which was once clear blue, now covered with ash gray clouds sprouting showers which only seemed to get heavier as time passed by.
The temperature around you seemed to drop a little even though you had made sure to shut the windows, scared these peaceful showers may turn into a rageful storm any given moment.
You had always enjoyed the rain. The feeling of cold pure water hitting your skin always felt like a fun feeling but you hated how it always turned into something so dangerous in such a little time. Ever since young, you were scared of loud sounds and thunder was one of them. You hated being alone on such a night as your mind only wandered to one person.
To hwang<3
can you come over? please?
It was a selfish request. A part of you knew what his reply was going to be. He would not show up even if the sky was to be crystal clear, you were truly a fool to expect him to show up in this rain that too at this time. But still you stared at your blank phone screen hoping it would light up with his message.
Hyunjin was always like that. But that doesn't mean your relationship was toxic- no. He loved you alot, but he never was able to show it. Skinship wasn't that big of a liking to him but you had noticed how he started to hug you, touch you, kiss you a lot more often than he ever would. You could see he was trying and you would always be there for him but there were times you hoped he would think before speaking. He was never trying to hurt you, but sometimes his words came out a little harsher to your liking and you could admit to being sensitive over little things but you couldn't help it, sometimes it did hurt and it wasn't his words, but how you thought how easily you could lose him. Hyunjin was beautiful, sculpted by the angels themselves, he was what many would wish for. You had him but you were afraid of not being able to keep him. He could always find someone better than you and that always haunted you.
Minutes passed away as air around you slowly started to become more cold giving you slight chills. You were now sitting on your couch, hugging your legs closer to your chest, still staring at the black screen which never seemed to blink the notification you were waiting for. Maybe he fell asleep... Your lids were starting to get heavy but you couldn't dare to sleep. The wind was hitting window sills as the rain only started to get heavier and you knew what would follow after.
Your thoughts seemed to be broken with a string of ding-dongs as you unlocked your phone to check the time, too late for anyone to show up unless-
You unlock your door pulling it back slightly to look at the man standing in front of you. A small smile tugged your lips as you let him in, your heart letting out a small flutter of joy.
Fortunately he didn't seem to be affected by the rain as his light gray hoodie still felt dry against you as he wrapped his arms around. Snuggling his head in your shoulder, his long hair tickled your collarbone as you wrapped your arms around his neck, your fingers playing with the loose dark strands. But as peaceful as this position was, a sudden loud sound took over and your hold around him became unconsciously tighter.
"It's okay", his voice, slightly deeper than usual but still as soft as it always was, fell against your ears as you shook your head pulling him closer.
Hyunjin always had a calm aura around him and you always guessed it was the fact how he always smells like vanilla mixed with the scent of something fresh.
Hyunjin was aware of your phobia of loud sounds and especially thunder. He saw your text and swore he had typed a 'yes' but in a hurry to be with you he might've forgotten to hit the send button. He led you towards the couch making you sit between his legs so now he could spoon your whole body from behind and also be able to see your face.
"Do you want to drink something?", you asked, almost whispering fiddling with the silver plated rings on his fingers, "I'm good", he whispered back, his breath hitting your neck, his lips ghosting above your skin. You knew what his intentions were and you were proved right as his teeth sunk in your skin, a small hiss leaving your lips as he sucked on it leaving a mark. This is one of a lot of things you came to know about him, how he loved to mark you and though he would never admit he enjoyed it when you did too.
You turn around, facing him, changing your position so now you sat on his lap, your knees on either side. His lips curved up in a small smile as he brushed a strand of hair behind your ear, cupping your face. You leaned in, your lips brushing over his as he waited to be kissed and so you finally attached them, a slight taste of vaseline lingering on tongue making you smile but as soon vanishes as a loud roar rings in your ear again, the clouds colliding making you feel as if they are specifically angry on you.
"It's okay baby, it will get over", Hyunjin whispers in an attempt to calm you down but who's going to tell him that his presence, how he is holding you at the moment is enough to make you feel safe. He was enough to make you feel safe. He was your safe place.
Your sweeter place.
#Spotify#hwanghyunjin#hyunjinoneshot#imagines#felix#bangchan#seungmin#oneshots#skzoneshots#smut#skzsmut#hyunjin imagines#hyunjin#straykids#skz#kpop oneshots#kpop imagines#hyunjinsmut#han jisung#hyunjin smut#hwang hyunjin smut
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i watched mary & george today and was blown away by it. i don’t tend to go for historical/period dramas and i tend to struggle to concentrate solely on a tv show, but i spent probably 80% of the time not using my phone (because it was so captivating) which is ridiculous given my normal which is like 25% max not on my phone. it was really very good.
spoiler thoughts under the cut, still processing my emotions tbh but it got q long
i would have liked to see more of the relationship between george & the king, it was - by all accounts - a very close relationship & the show presented it less in depth. i was really hoping “christ had john and i have george” would make it in, as well as some of their letters, but i guess it was focused too much on mary & george to fill that in. the relationship also seemed… weird? why did the king bite him like that?? other than occasional moments it didn’t feel like i was maybe expecting it to. i wasn’t expecting blatant love and affection but i was expecting some. it seemed mostly focused on the arguments.
i was surprised they went with george physically killing the king - while it is speculated he poisoned him, it was done through medication rather than so abruptly/violently. it made him much more… villainous, i suppose, determined to do anything to protect his position including killing the one he claimed to love, but it just… i didn’t really like that.
i saw someone saying about how george’s death was rushed and inconsequential and just of no real value & that was demonstrating how little impact his death really had - they had to hold his funeral at night because people loathed him so - & thought that was really interesting.
when george slept with carr only to say he just wanted him to think of that as he died… chills. they were both using sex to get the other to do something for them, the parallel between characters is beautiful there
the king’s heart scene… that was really special.
i loved that they showed george as loving katherine. i don’t know if he did in real life, but it was really nice that they had such a bond in this. she was very pragmatic and i think they were a great pairing.
very sad about sandie’s death. i hadn’t connected that it was bacon who’d ordered it until he said and it was very frustrating. so much backstabbing.
the… decapitation scene had me hiding from the screen only to be fooled and i had started looking again & they showed the decapitated head arghhh. unhappy about that. the hangings were.. not great but slightly better.
wasn’t expecting the second scene to be someone hung from a tree either which was an incredible shock.
cringed a lot at the dancing lol. i was glad that the ‘may i perform for you’ was about the instrument and not a dance. much less embarrassing.
i felt really bad for charles with the spanish bit. that was really frustrating and annoying.
kit rescuing george was my favourite thing. gross way to do so but the ‘how is he going to get out of this’ to “oh kit!!” was wonderful. george’s “are you sure we weren’t followed” in hindsight being ‘did you see kit’ was so clever. i think id have to watch it again to catch more nuances like that.
mary telling the attendants to leave her attached to george a little longer was soooo telling of their attachment, on mary’s behalf anyway.
the scene where george decides to go and join the french pair was really well done, his hesitation and then return when he decided to give in was so good. the being torn between what is “right” and what he wants.
love that they went back to the guy who was saying george would never get w the king & that he saw he’d managed it. really nice link there.
lastly (because im gonna keep going indefinitely otherwise) i really liked the lighting. the night scenes were accurately lit - firelight and candlelight - but you could still see what you needed to see, and it wasn’t just dark and dreary.
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my partner agrees with me so i took it as a go ahead to write a trailer pitch DC plz hire me
Picture it: black screen, the single ~Iconique~ single piano note plays (I may not be anything close to goth or punk or emo and actually avoid wearing black at all costs, but even I know how iconic the first piano note is), and the instrumental bit of the beginning of the song plays as the various movie company logos fade onto the scene, probably in time with the notes.
The first verse kicks in over a scene of a kiddo and his dad and you’re made to THINK it’s baby Bruce Wayne and his dad but SIKE I foOLED you! It’s ROBIN (cuz if any Batman deserves a sweet sunshiney boy, it’s Battinson) and his dad, talking about… idk. Something. Tbh I don’t know a lot of Batman Lore™️- that’s someone else’s job.
A cut to black with “he said son when-”, and the next words of the song are matched with quick scenes of the Wayne parents deaths and also Robin’s parent’s deaths (he’s an orphan in the Lego Batman Movie, the only other Batman media that’s good that I’ve seen besides scattered episodes of old Cartoon Network shows, so like. Dead parents. Probably) and the continuing of Bruce’s Batman-ing (“will you be the savior of the broken” etc. etc.) and beginning of Robin’s Robin-ing
The song fades into an instrumental as the proper trailer stuff happens, whatever villain of the rogues gallery the sequel decides to go with and their shenanigans (side note it better not be Joker cuz I Just Don’t Care For Him and he’s Not That Interesting send tweet. Keep him in jail. Where he belongs) coming in around a minor key chorus, and the actual story of the sequel is presented here. It’ll be one of those movies where the whole time Bruce is like “I couldn’t care less about you kid don’t get in my way” but not-so-secretly he’s all “I CARE ABOUT YOU SO MUCH KID”
And the rock opera part of the song (“caaaary onnnnn we’ll caaary oooon”) BLASTS back in when Bats comes back with scenes of him doing cool Batman stuff, but Especially with him helping people and being the source of hope like he said he wanted to try to be at the end of the first movie (when we all said ‘YES! Now THIS is Batman!!’ Even me. Who hasn’t even seen any other live-action Batsmen but I Know they’re Not Him. Battinson Is him. I saw it described like the other live-action Batsmen would be perching gloomily on the side of a building like a gargoyle at the end where the rescues at the flood are happening, but Battinson is THERE helping out HIMSELF! In the immortal words of Red OSP: “If your Batman can’t comfort a crying child then he’s not Batman”) and him being A Good Dad to his new sunshiney sidekick. Also insert gratuitous shots of RPatts with smudgy eyeliner again (cuz this Batman’s for the gays and theys and goths) and Alfred being a Supportive Dad Figure™️ and maybe a quick shot of Selina Kyle, if she’s coming back for the sequel as well. Or keep her a secret so audiences can be surprised. Whatever works. But also there’s shots of Bruce as Bruce Wayne, helping out people in situations where Batman is not needed (like with money and stuff), and he’s like. Still a soft-spoken, scrungly, sopping wet cryptid of a man (hc he’s autistic I claim him), but he’s doing good! For his city!!
Anyway, as the final “caAArY OOonn!” and that part with the chanting, (“I’m just a boy not a hero”) the title and release date fade in here over like. A shot of the city skyline or something. Idk.
And there we go. What we could have if the director of the Batman sequel isn’t a coward.
oh also one more note mr. director: More bats. Like. Real bats. Just for me. because i love them
#i just have a lot of thoughts about The Batman 2022#dc#the Batman 2022#battinson#i typed most of this out over lunch at work lol...
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Tarot Inspired Journal Prompts
Tarot Inspired Journal Prompts
Fool: what is something new you are doing or want to do?
Go to the ren fair, doing that this weekend for my birthday :)
Magician: what is a magical way to enhance my day? Or, how can I be more like the magician?
I like to draw sigils on myself and lover
High Priestess: what are my thoughts on divination? What about intuition?
Both are great for guidance
Empress: what part of myself do I want to grow/nurture?
My self compassion
Emperor: what part of my life needs me to take authority? How can I?
How I live, when I do things, how I do them, and how I make myself do them. Better consistent planning
High Priest: what are my personal traditions? How is my spirituality unique to me?
Spells are art or useful things, no spell jars really. I see things differently, my autism is great for that. I feel things differently than others.
Lovers: what relationships mean the most to me?
My dad, my dog, my love
Chariot: what part of my life needs me to be more combative/ warrior-like?
Making myself do the things I need to do, simple things such as putting away clothes
Strength: what part of my life should I face with courage?
Facing the future
Hermit: what do I need to do alone more often? What do I need to do with others more often?
Take baths and do spells - just hang out anything really
Wheel of Fortune: what do I think about luck, fate, and/or fortune?
Hmm not sure haven't really thought about this before
Justice: when do I need to focus on legality vs fairness? Or, What may cause me to seek justice/retribution?
I don't think this really applies to this chapter of my life
Hanged Man: what have/will I sacrifice for -x-? What am I never willing to sacrifice? What will I easily give up?
I have sacrificed friendships to keep my own morals and boundaries. I will never sacrifice living with my dog lol. I would easily give up things that make other uncomfortable (if its not something essential to my being/personality or crosses my boundaries)
Death: what is something personal I want to end or change? What is something that will end or change no matter how I feel? How can I accept it?
The feeling of mundaneness day to day. But I know that will ultimately change :) I accept that with much happiness
Temperance: what part of my life needs more patience? What part needs more balance? How can I achieve both?
At my job with the teenagers, they're just kids. I try really hard to not be condescending when I'm teaching them something over again. I just need to remember the person I want to be and think "How do I wanna think about this?" before speaking. I need more balance between rest and play, I tend to think play is rest, that is just not true. I find it very hard to rest sometimes, even to watch a tv show, I constantly need stimulation. Less screen time would probably very beneficial.
Devil: what is a primal desire I have? Should I grant it to myself? Why or why not? How can I get what I want?
To be naked in nature lol, I think about it a lot how we as humans aren't "allowed" to do this anymore. I should grant this to myself, my love has a family ranch with aches and aches of woods so there is def the privacy to go out there and do this. Why I should, it is grounding and our most humanistic way to be.
Tower: what can I learn from the current or recent chaos/disaster in my life?
You won't always have close friends, but you'll always have yourself.
Star: what do I hope for? How can I get it?
Travel, make money
Moon: what part of my life is best kept private? Why?
Private, Private
Sun: what makes me happy?
My dog miss Angel
Judgement: what part of me needs reflection? What is a fair assessment of that part?
All of me, I'm not ready, thats okay
World: what parts of my life have been fulfilled? What parts are still lacking?
Young adventures, my love, I have everything I need, I just wish for a best friend again
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CEXUAL MISHAPS
I rarely buy new. One's junk is my treasure, or so I thought -- sometimes junk is junk -- and my latest adventure taught me many lessons in upCEXing. Let me share the wisdom I inadvertently acquired dealing with CEX and old technology for the modern times.
This is a guide for whoever is looking to buy a used Mac and get the best value for a limited budget. Having done a lot of research during this bumpy adventure, this “essay” will answer the following existential questions:
• Can a Mac Pro shaped like a trashcan do the job today?
• Why dust off an old FireWire iSight camera and how?
• Is third party SSD blade worth the trouble?
• Which budget display comes close to Apple’s retina experience?
• Why choose an Intel Mac over a new M1 or M2 “affordable” and more powerful Mac Mini?
• Is CEX’s 24-month warranty risk-free?
My iMac 5K (late 2014) is dying. It's had three open heart surgeries (logic board replacements) within the first three years of its extended warranty. A few months after the warranty ended, I had to replace the power supply for a third party part which actually fixed several USB/Bluetooth/audio streaming dropout issues I had had from the start, issues that Apple’s geniuses attributed to software. A genius by script is a fool. Now, the iMac's wonderful screen's usable space is shrinking by the month, a beige fog thickening from the edges in, creating a widening trench where ghosts appear and fade away very, very slowly. The screen defects coupled with hardware errors that point to a bad core prompted me to look for a replacement machine. It had to be Intel. Apple's new M1 and M2 computers offer great power but no upgradeable route for the future, and many of my favourite software plugins are Intel only.
Initially I looked for a used Intel Mac Mini, which has just been discontinued by Apple with the introduction of their new M2 Mini. It had to be an i7. Sadly they go for a great lump of dough and they are highly desirable, therefore hard to find -- I love recycling, but hate the chase... During my search, I stumbled across the "trashcan" Mac Pro. To my surprise, people can’t seem to shift them on the second-hand market -- not desirable, therefore cheap and easy to find -- my kind of bargain.
I always wanted a "trashcan" Mac Pro. I once had the Power Mac G4 Cube, and find the late 2013 Pro (not so affectionally dubbed ‘trashcan’) a direct successor to my beloved Cube. It’s more than nostalgia, I assure you.
Power Mac G4 Cube 2000 - 2001
I chose CEX for their 24 month peace-of-mind warranty, and set the sat-nav for the closest Trashcan Pro available. The unit was pristine! I drove back home drooling, almost foaming at the mouth, I even resisted stopping for a toilet break -- I was the owner of the legendary "trashcan" Mac Pro! YES! The same one that went for £5K when new! I paid for it all in trade! BARGAIN!
Except it wasn't a bargain at all.
You saw that coming, of course; why would I write about happy times? The Trashcan Pro was trash. This would be the start of ongoing trials and tribulations which I hope to be done with by the time I finish writing this.
Mac Pro (Late 2013) 2013 - 2019
At first glance, the Mac Pro (late 2013) may appear like a step back from my iMac 5K (late 2014) but it actually supports a newer OS (Monterey vs the iMac's Big Sur). The Mac Pro is also still officially supported by Apple whilst the iMac became obsoletea few years back. Also, the Mac Pro's guts, including the CPU, can be upgraded up to a 12 core CPU, 128 GB RAM vs my iMac which is already maxed out with a consumer grade CPU (i7 4core), 32 GB RAM, 4 GB VRAM. It seemed like the right upgrade in theory, but I would not find out with a defective unit.
CEX has a 14-day return policy and a 24-month peace-of-mind warranty, YIPPEE!
I chose a different model located further away (London) and opted for delivery. Eventually, after an agonising week trying to rouse CEX out of their stupor (the item remained at 'stock-picking-in-progress' for five days), I received a unit that had surely gone through hell and back: scratches, discolouration, sticky spillage, dust, dust, dust, and I'm not talking fine dust; I pulled dust-bunnies from the grills the width of my pinky toe.
CEX has a 14-day return policy and a 24-month peace-of-mind warranty, so I gave it a chance.
Lesson starts here, my friends…
• SSD, or how to upgrade an old MAC’s storage.
Sadly, the Mac Pro came with a third party 512 GB SSD fitted with an adapter.
Adapters - buy cheap buy thrice!
Between 2012 and 2019, Apple used two types of connector for their SSD blades, both proprietary. In order to use a third party blade, one would need an adapter. The part is widely available and cheap. Thankfully? No. Apple rarely does things willy nilly. In order to work nice with the Mac, the SSD itself needs to comply to the Mac's and its OS' requirements, ECC being the start of many geeky terms I won't bore you with. So you think you can use any SSD with the said adapter? No. No you cannot. It might work for a little while, but you'll soon encounter issues with basic functionality. You'll see the blank folder-of-doom with the question mark. You'll have to zap the PRAM in order to force it to detect the SSD, which can only be done with a wired keyboard, I should add (I love "vintage", but I'm not a fan of wires). Latest Mac OS update that necessitates a restart will struggle to complete and leave you sitting at a blank screen hoping that another PRAM ZAP will do the trick. Beyond that, every time you turn the Mac off, the adapter will cause a kernel panic and have the Mac instantly reboot instead, punishing you for modding it with a cheap hack.
☒ 2012 - mid 2013 7-17 pin SSD APPLE connector
☑︎ Mid 2013 - 2019 12-16 pin SSD APPLE connector
Cometh OWC, the Mac friendly people who offer a solution at a premium price, of course. Their Aura Pro X2 blades offer speeds the Mac's old architecture can realise, but at 4x the price of SSD blades on the market, I decided to look secondhand. Remember CEX and their peace-of-mind warranty?
CEX happened to have a 1 TB OWC at a bargain price — oh goody! Several days later, the order got cancelled. Apparently they couldn't dispatch the item without further explanation and the item returned online for the taking. I tried again. I'm still waiting. I expect the same outcome, but I have decided to play along and see where that leads me.
In the meantime, I discovered that Apple used three manufacturers for their SSD blades: Samsung, Toshiba and Sandisk. They used two different connectors: 7-17 pin between 2012 and up to mid 2013, and 12-16 pin from mid 2013 up to 2019. Technically, it's possible to source out an OEM Apple part! Good news! CEX, 14 day, 24 month. Can’t go wrong… Unless the item remains in stock picking limbo and ends in cancellation. The OEM Samsung did not return in-stock, however, and I’m still waiting on the OWC...
Cometh eBay. £45 shipping included, Apple OEM made by Samsung, 512 GB, apparently in good condition. I should get it in 48 hours. More on the SSD saga later.
• DISPLAY for MAC peeps.
Coming from a 5K retina display at 218 PPI which looks like ink on paper -- no apparent pixelation -- I could not go for the common sub 100 PPI display. High pixel density monitors are not easy to find, mainly because the PC market caters to gamers (fast refresh rate performance over quality). You'll find plenty of 4K screens at 120 Hz, but what about PPI?
Well...
Research lead me to a 2016 LG 24inch 4K display which offers 185PPI and a displayport. LG has since updated the model, rebranding it under their ultrafine line which only adds 1 pixel “advantage” over the old one (186PPI)... But with the latter using USB-C connectivity, and being twice as expensive, the old model it is! CEX, 14-day, 24-month warranty… But there’s a snag… They don't ship displays. Collect only.
The nearest one of the three available was in Bradford, seventy miles from my door. I love an adventure — DAY TRIP! Bradford is a massive crater illuminated to the brim with rows and rows of fairylights, like standing at the heart of a gigantic beehive breeding glowing larvas. I enjoyed the sight. The CEX employees were lovely. I discovered Dunkin' Donuts had infiltrated the UK too! Bonus! I got a £10 box of 6 (3 maple, 3 Boston creams) possibly for the first and last time, at least on this side of the pond. Dunkin’ Donuts isn’t worth nearly £2 a piece. But I felt the rush of the adventure, and the fruition of a successful bargain hunt raised my spirit.
CEX was too busy to let me test the display. 14 day. 24 month. Can return it to any store. High spirits. Sugar rush. I chose the countryside roads. Sundown. Narrow lanes. No street light. Peaks, twists, the thickest fog I have ever encountered. An omen.
Home, safe, the display turned out to be complete garbage: rows of dead pixels; wide long “burn marks” or "smears" with a bubble on the physical surface of the screen. I began to ask myself what is a 14-day / 24-month warranty worth if everything I buy from CEX is unusable?! I promptly returned the display at my local CEX. Despite it all, spellbound by their 14-day / 24-month warranty, I gave them another chance. What are the odds that a second display turned out as bad as the first? Sheffield? Crystal Peaks? Haven’t been in a while, why not… I waited for the online confirmation the next day, but got a cancellation notice instead. Apparently, the display can’t be located.
(…)
Cometh eBay. Pristine condition. No warranty, but fuss-free. Lovely seller. Unit like new. Why was he selling such a wonderful display? Because he is using Windows, and Windows can’t scale a high pixel density display like the Mac does. My gain. Cheaper than CEX’s. Jackpot!
One last piece of the puzzle missing, though…
• SSD saga continued…
After a week, the 1 TB OWC gets cancelled at CEX on the day I received the 512 GB Apple OEM from eBay. I could finally test my new Trashcan Pro properly.
Let’s gather up the gear I’m playing with first.
My "new" kit
• Mac Pro (Late 2013) 3.5 GHz 6-Core Intel Xeon E5 with dual AMD FirePro D500 3 GB
£380 from CEX
I added 2x 16 GB 1866 MHz DDR3, leaving 2 empty slots for later IF the Mac Pro is a good egg. The good egg gets more ram. The bad egg goes back to CEX and I rethink the whole thing.
I switched the problematic third party SSD with an Apple OEM (Samsung) 512 GB SSD, bypassing the need for an unsupported adapter.
• LG 24inch 4K UHD IPS LED 24UD58-B DISPLAY
£130 on eBay
As close to Apple’s retina display as a budget monitor can get. I’m very pleased with this purchase. I work with it at a 3008 x 1692 scale. My eyes can’t focus at a close enough distance from the screen to notice any discernible pixelation. At 185 PPI versus the iMac’s 218 PPI, the window round edges aren’t as smooth, but by a narrow margin. You’d need to be as hopelessly finicky as me to notice.
• Accessories
Magic keyboard + trackpad (space grey), Apple HI-FI (more on that), ORICO SSD 10 Gbps enclosure + various USB3 external HDDs, Apple iSight camera (more on that).
First, I dressed the Apple OEM SSD with a layer of thermal tape then formatted it in online recovery mode (command + option + R on restart), and installed Monterey from scratch. Since, the Mac Pro has behaved like a Mac should.
LESSON #1: don’t use third party SSD with adapter.
I should add that I tested 3 different adapters — all resulted with a less than desirable outcome. Unless you prevent your Mac to ever go to sleep and never, EVER restart it — I can’t recommend a third party solution.
Orico 10 Gbps SSD enclosure
Since I had bought a WD 1 TB “green” SSD to test the setup with, I opted for an ORICO SSD enclosure for fast external storage, which brings us to the Mac Pro’s older connections problem.
However tempting it is to get a Thunderbolt 2 enclosure, HDD, RAID, etc… DON’T! I already had a G-TECH raid for my iMac 5K, and the external SSD enclosure proved faster despite being limited by the Mac Pro’s USB3 speed (5 Gbps versus Thunderbolt 2’s 20 Gbps) which comes down to the mechanical HDD’s limitation versus the SSD’s. And yes, the SSD on USB3 outperformed the 7200RPM RAID 0 speed on both small and large files using Blackmagic’s speed test software.
LESSON #2: don’t waste your time and money searching for a Thunderbolt 2 solution.
Many RAID enclosures or external HDDs with Thunderbolt 2 are now too old to be trusted, and unless the unit is designed for the Mac, their software won’t be supported with the latest Mac OS. My G-Tech works with the Mac’s own disk utility tool, but others don’t and will be formatted for Windows.
Apple Hi-FI still rockin'
Speakers… I have 2 HomePod Minis that I wrestled with for a while. I used them -- or tried to use them -- as a stereo pair. Ideally I wanted to reproduce the look of the old Powermac G4 Cube with its gorgeous spherical speakers (see G4 Cube picture at the very top). But the HomePod Minis never worked as expected with the iMac 5K nor with the Mac Pro. I suspect it comes down to the older bluetooth 4 as the HomePod Minis play well with my Macbook Air M1 (bluetooth 5). Never mind, my Apple HI-FI still works and the Mac Pro has and optical sound output. The HI-FI is a fabulous boombox. They are hard to find and fetch a fortune, but I’m lucky to have gotten one back then. Apple’s HI-FI truly sounds amazing.
LESSON #3: old gear is fun
Apple iSight Camera 2003 - 2006
Speaking of legacy products… I love Apple’s old iSight camera. With the iMac 5K sporting a superior and integrated cam, I benched the FireWire iSight Camera and never thought I’d use it again… Except, the Mac Pro doesn’t come with a webcam, and it’s enough that I have to stare at LG’s generic plastic design all day that I thought of resurrecting the old iSight for a bit of Apple chic.
But it has FireWire 400, I hear you say dismissively?
Thunderbolt to FireWire 800 + FW800 - FW400 adapters
I found Apple’s Thunderbolt to FireWire adapter on Amazon for a reasonable price, £2 more than the cheapest one on eBay or CEX. With a £3 FW800 to FW400 adapter, my iSight camera is standing proud above all this “new” kit and working fine. Nostalgia? No! Not “entirely”! I call it recycling. Good for the environment, and I look better in standard definition too!
• SO IS IT WORTH ALL THE FUSS?!!!
Or is it Mac-fanatic indulgence? The Mac Pro actually outperforms the iMac 5k on many things, and I got quite lucky. As it turns out, the first Mac Pro I returned was manufactured in February 2014, not long after the model was first introduced. The second one, which is running smoooooothly so far, was manufactured in October 2018, not long before the model was discontinued. How can you find out when your secondhand Mac was manufactured? Here’s the link for you.
PROS
• Runs Monterey like a top
• Faster with multi-thread computation (particularly with video encoding) than many newer Macs
• Standalone unit — if it goes bust, I still have a working screen — if the screen dies, I still have the Mac Pro
• Upgradable to impressive specs - CPU - RAM
• Can boot with Windows unlike the M1/M2 Macs
• Compatibility with existing software
• Still handles latest pro apps without a sweat
CONS
• Very slightly slower on every day single-thread tasks such as surfing and mail (more cores = lower GHz)
• Output: Thunderbolt 2 (legacy mini displayport connection), USB 3 (5 Gbps), HDMI 1.4 (30Hz @ 4K), bluetooth 4
• Expensive eGPU expansion only
Right, enough geeking about for a while. I do hope this has helped some of you.
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[#2023]
2022 feels kind of strange, especially in the first few months. I don’t know why, but something tells me that everything is bound to get back to normal very soon.
Anyway, I managed to publish 16 posts this year compared to 6 posts from the previous year. Well, I didn’t feel like writing much, mostly due to my extreme case of procrastination along with a slight case of depression and writer’s block, but hopefully I can get my mind (and my life) back on track once again.
All right, time for me to share some of the highlights for 2022:
The year begins with an incredibly cold spell, with a lot of people suffering from coughs, colds, and/or fever. Even I caught all three of them. I was sick for a couple of days, and my sore throat and itchy cough persisted for more than a week. Worse, there was a shortage of paracetamol and other medicines for coughs and colds at the time, so it took us a while to stock up on some medicine. Luckily, we all recovered within a two-week period.
I find myself watching a lot of YouTube videos compared to the previous years I’ve been online. This is becoming a habit now, and I think I’ll probably spend at least an hour per day just to watch some videos from various YouTubers and channels.
I gradually returned to blogging after a long period of inactivity. Anyway, I published TWATKcox’s 9th anniversary post more than a week after the supposed target date. It features the things I want to do before I turn 40. I was trying to be realistic on this one, knowing that I’m gonna have a hard time fulfilling each one of them before the decade ends.
The Otaku Diaries on TWATKcox-WP will primarily feature select topics, whereas its Tumblr counterpart will handle the rest, including anime and manga reviews. So far, I’ve never written anything for the series, but I’m already working on some of them.
Earlier this year, I discovered something awesome and a potential addition to my extensive playlist, a musical project called Ginger Root, fronted by Cameron Lew. Ever since I stumbled upon one of their songs (Loretta), I immediately become hooked by their music, which is kind of reminiscent of the Japanese city pop genre. I also loved some of their retro-styled music videos as well.
A day after April Fools’ Day (I don’t celebrate that joke holiday, thank you very much), I paid a visit to my favorite hangout spot (Lagro, Quezon City) for the first time in more than two years, and discovered two new hangout places: Daily Grind Cafe DGC, the one I visited that day, and Drip’n Cafe which I visited a few months later. Both are located near my high school, and I’m really delighted that I’ve got additional choices for my weekend rituals, which I haven’t done in such a long time. Their offerings (especially their coffee drinks) are quite pricey, so I’ll probably reserve these for special occasions (such as holidays), or when I can splurge a lot of money without breaking the bank.
Come to think of it, I was wondering what happened to Jits Cafe, one of the milk tea/coffee shop that I frequented since 2015. During my previous visits to the newly opened coffee shop beside it, they are closed. Either they just happened to closed early (even though it’s only 4:00 PM when I got there) or they’re actually closed on that day. I’ve yet to check the dessert shop though.
At the beginning of May, the Xiaomi Mi A1 suddenly had a problem right after charging it. The phone simply wouldn’t boot to Android and recovery ROM upon rebooting, and I had a hard time figuring out how to retrieve the photos (particularly some pics from my then recent visit to Lagro, which I, unfortunately, never get to back up prior to the malfunction). I don’t know if I’ll ever get to save the photos, but I’m hoping I could recover some of it.
As the Mi A1 is slightly damaged (the SIM card/Micro SD tray is damaged and the screen is slightly raised, revealing the LED inside), my brother got me a new phone, a Motorola Moto G 5G Plus, a mid-range smartphone with a bigger battery, larger internal storage, and slightly longer screen. I initially had a hard time adjusting at first, but I got used to it, especially the finger sensor on the power button (right side). Anyway, as for the Mi A1, I’m still trying to figure out how to flash a custom ROM to it so I can finally begin retrieving the photos on that device.
In June, I managed to publish the lengthy 350th post special, Twenty Years With The Machine: From 9x to 11, which records my personal experiences with different desktop PCs, a laptop PC, and most of the Windows OS (from Windows 95 to Windows 11, but skipping Windows 2000 and Windows 8.1 for some reason).
By the beginning of July, the 2TB Seagate Backup Plus external hard drive showed signs of failure. This is where I used to store most of my files when the PC’s old hard drive failed back in 2018. Luckily I managed to transferred some of the files to a new external hard drive, a 5TB Western Digital My Passport, bought during the Lazada 7.7 sale. As of this writing, I’m still in the process of backing up the entire contents of the PC’s hard drive.
By the end of that same month, the UPS (uninterruptable power supply) showed signs of failure as well, as it can no longer power my desktop PC. So I’m back to using the AVR (automatic voltage regulator) for the time being, with a possibility of unexpected interruptions during power interruptions. It was eventually replaced by a new one by the end of September.
On September 17th, I finally get to visit the Manila International Book Fair for the first time since 2019, as well as the largest IKEA store at the Mall Of Asia Complex. It also marks my first mall-hopping trip for the first time since the pandemic.
I celebrated my 32nd birthday at home with a feast: Marugame Udon’s rice bowl meals for lunch (I had katsu curry), North Park’s braised noodles, fried rice, and spicy calamares (can’t recall what we exactly ordered) for dinner, and Kumori’s strawberry hanjuku cheesecake for my birthday cake (all of these are delivered via Grab Food). That was the most expensive birthday feast ever, but I really enjoyed it so much.
I joined Mastodon last November, though it is quite a spur-of-the-moment thing as I have no plans of leaving Twitter yet (probably never will). You know, just in case Elon Musk (the microblogging site’s new owner) did some irreparable damage to Twitter and would end up like Friendster, Multiply, and Myspace (the latter one is still active, but... meh). I love Twitter (I still do), but I wished he would focus on improving the site’s interface, not ruining it.
I’m expected to upgrade and update almost everything, from my wardrobe (some new clothes, and probably a new pair of glasses), to my bed (with a new bed frame). Also, I decide to clean my room and reorganize some of the stuff.
As much as I wanted to have a booster shot before the year ends, I’d rather wait for an appropriate vaccine, preferably the one I was inoculated with (AstraZeneca, in case you’re wondering).
For the first time, as part of the accounting firm’s first ever Christmas Party, I had fun with bowling together with the rest of the employees and a couple of interns. We had a buffet lunch afterward.
I get to spend Christmas with my mom for the second time since the pandemic, and I manage to buy a new pair of embroidered ninja socks. I haven’t been successful in buying new pairs of black slacks, which are a very crucial part of my wardrobe.
As usual, I’m not feeling up to posting my upcoming plans for 2023 due to various uncertainties. But I’m so looking forward to celebrating TWATKcox’s tenth anniversary, as well as attending the upcoming Pinoy Otaku Festival 2023: Shizen at Robinsons Novaliches and the Manila International Book Fair 2023 at the SMX Convention Center (Mall Of Asia Complex). Hopefully, I can update my wardrobe in time so I can finally go out in style once again.
The year 2022 may have brought some significant changes in my life, but I’m still miserable as hell like in the previous two years. My life is still plagued with self-doubt, anxiety, and some conflicts, but I’m trying my best to remain as optimistic as possible. Will 2023 finally put an end to this kind of misery I’m having? I really hoped so. I mean, I deserve something better after almost three years of dealing with this stupid pandemic. ‘Nuff said.
Now that the New Year celebrations are over, it’s time to live up to your New Year’s resolutions, whatever you’re aiming to achieve for this year. All right, watch out for TWATKcox’s upcoming tenth anniversary post later this month, and probably some notable posts for this year as well.
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this is it, this is the entire invincible II crew
#iswm spoilers#markiplier#pear post#loving these fools a lot i hope they get more screen time in may#thats it thats just their characters#gunther#celci#burt#pear video edit
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welcome new followers! here's some info to get started
this blog posts a lot! for filtering purposes, here are my COMMON TAGS:
#gaudy quotes, posts that include my more outlandish remarks
#gaudy fanart (bc for some reason my amazing artist followers sometimes use their impressive talents to draw my silly little internet persona)
#long post (usually humorous but require some scrolling)
#not a shitpost for posts that don't have a punchline (but you may find interesting or helpful)
#clown tw or #another good clown post, most of which are not good posts :)
#another good vampire post (most of which actually are good posts)
#ocean tw and #whale tw (the ocean makes me anxious and i am generous enough to spread that anxiety around)
#actuallyautistic, bc I'm autistic and sometimes I post about that. similarly, #mental health for posts about self-care, ADHD, depression, anxiety, etc.
#serious post (for posts that include more serious topics)
#tw [topic] for common trigger warnings, such as 'tw insect' or 'tw body horror' or 'tw trauma'. I use a lot of these, feel free to make requests! I try to be consistent, but please remind me if I forget something.
#harassment tw (I occasionally post about my experiences with being the target of an online smear campaign, and my thoughts on harassment culture)
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#sexual humor most of my jokes are clean, but a few of them use bawdy humor. please filter appropriately!
And here is some GENERAL INFO:
Hi! You can call me Gaudy or Gaud (pronounced 'god,' which is a complete coincidence I am not responsible for, these things just seem to happen to me). I'm they/them.
this blog has a huge archive of shitposts, bizarre facts & random positivity, enjoy! There are almost 45 thousand original posts & articles here, if you are looking for the mental & emotional equivalent of being swallowed by quicksand and simultaneously engulfed by a rock slide <3
here are some old favorites to get you started: The Dollar Post, The Nickel Post, Twitter vs Tumblr, Boy’s Night, Make This Creepy, and some various random others etcetera, no wait here have some more!!! wait i lied here’s more
I also do some creative humor/horror writing, including: Clown Meat Deli Dream, the April Fool’s Saga of the Door, and Don’t Touch the Pink Stuff
yes I am responsible for the Grinch x Tony the Tiger Fanfic
please point out any typos!
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lockscreen | t.h.
tom holland x famous!reader
warnings: none just fluff
summary: tom goes on jimmy fallon for a game of 'show me your phone'. being the oblivious child he is, tom forgets about his lockscreen.
wc: 1.4k
"Welcome back! We're here again with the star of the Spider-Man series, Tom Holland!" Jimmy's announcement drew cheers from the audience. "Tonight, we are going to be playing a game called 'Show Me Your Phone'."
Jimmy went on to explain the game to the crowd as Tom sat across from him patiently waiting. Jimmy pressed on the button first and ended up showing the world that his last photo was a selfie taken minutes ago in the washroom. That gained a lot of laughs. Then it was Tom's turn.
"I'm terrified. I don't even know what's on my phone." Tom shook his hands before firmly pushing the button. It landed on the iMessage icon. "Oh? My last text message convo?" he began to unlock his phone. Eyes skimming over his lockscreen.
"Yup, and once it's locked in, you can't touch it." Jimmy reminded him of the rules as Tom quickly skimmed through his last conversation.
Tom ran a hand down his face before chuckling, "Oh, geez. Alright, some context, I needed help picking a tie for tonight and my mate, Harrison, is nowhere near helpful."
He placed his phone in front of the camera as the conversation appeared for the audience to read.
Tom: haz what tie? red or blue?
Harrison: youre ugly either way
Tom: you look like dolores umbridge. pick a tie ffs
Harrison: mm my babe umbridge. jokes. i'd say purple
Tom: you're gross and no help at all
Harrison: have fun babe the bed is waiting for you
Tom: don't make me puke before i go on the show
Harrison: puke on me daddy
The crowd bursted out into laughter along with Jimmy as Tom covered his beet red face in embarrassment. "He is going to kill me for showing that." Tom was laughing as he spoke.
"That's hilarious! Okay, my turn." Jimmy ended up sharing a voice memo of him reminding himself to do chores around the house.
Tom wiped his hands on his pants before pushing the large button again. It landed on the lock icon. "What does that mean?"
"You have to share your lockscreen."
Tom's posture visibly stiffened at the information given. He wished he had gotten some warning before coming on the show. A caution sign telling him to erase everything on the iPhone.
His lockscreen was a memory. A keepsake. You. A piece of his heart. A reminder of happiness and the loving moments you shared with one another. It was taken a little over a year ago at Zendaya's house for a get-together with a few close friends.
You were propped up on the kitchen island, a wide smile on your face. Tom standing in between your legs with his back to your chest. Your arms wrapped around his shoulders as he tilted his head and placed a kiss on your cheek. Jacob Batalon had captured the moment. A heartwarming interaction that you had both done an outstanding job at keeping under wraps.
You had been dating for nearly two years. How you had managed to keep it hidden for such an extended amount of time was a wonder to everyone who knew, including yourselves. It wasn't that you were both set on no one ever finding out, you just never saw the need to. It was your relationship, only meant to be shared between the two of you.
Tom hoped you wouldn't be mad if the world found out, but he enjoyed the privacy and the feeling of having something that was only his. Something he didn't have to share with the globe. Tom debated on his options. Showing the picture and making headlines for the next week or refusing to do so and ruining the game while making everyone suspicious of him.
The former won.
"Okay, um." Tom nervously let out a laugh, "Surprise?"
With shaking hands, he placed his locked phone on the stand and avoided looking into the crowd as reactions varied throughout the studio. Gasps, cheers, 'aww's, even some screams. Both of his hands shielded his expression from the cameras as he allowed the audience to examine the photo.
"Oh, my god! W-what?!" Jimmy stammered, shocked what his eyes saw, "That's Y/N Y/L/N! A-are you two?" his eyes flicked from the phone to Tom.
Tom nodded slowly, "Yeah, yeah. It is and we are. Nearly two years steady." this intel drew more shocked reactions from the habitants of the studio.
"This is amazing! We love Y/N! But wow, how did no one know?!" Jimmy was still in disbelief.
Tom smiled at your name, "I may be loose-lipped with movie spoilers, but this is proof that I can keep secrets."
Jimmy's mouth was agape, "I have so many questions and you are so lucky that we are out of time."
Tom released a breath he didn't know he was holding as Jimmy said goodbye to the cameras and they stopped recording.
As Tom made his way backstage to head to his hotel, his heart began to beat out of his chest as he thought about your reaction.
-
Lounging on his hotel comforter, Tom pulled out his phone once again and clicked on your contact. m'lady. Pressing the FaceTime icon.
Your bright smile lit up the screen, illuminating his mood like the sun on a stormy day.
"Hello, lover. To what do I owe the pleasure of this late night call?" you chuckled while sitting up against the headboard of your bed, Tessa laying beside you.
Tom couldn't suppress his grin at your presence even if it was through a screen, "Hi, darling. I didn't know if you would be awake. Isn't it nearly three in the morning there?"
You nodded and pushed your glasses up on your nose, "Had to run some lines with Tess before filming tomorrow. She's a great actress." you panned the camera over to the sleeping pup.
"Sometimes I think you're only with me for my dog." he joked with a light laugh.
"Shoot. I thought I had you fooled." you teased back, "Why did you call, bum?"
He scratched the back of neck and avoided looking at the screen. That was enough for you to know that something was up.
"What part of your movie did you spoil this time?" you chuckled.
Tom shook his head with a smile, brown curls flopping on his head, "Nothing about my film, love. More or less about us." he mumbled the last bit, but you heard it.
Your shoulders tensed involuntarily, "I'm gonna need more information than that."
"We were playing a game where you have to show certain things on your phone and I had to show my lockscreen and, well, you know what my lockscreen is." his nerves grew with every second that your face stayed expressionless.
"Okay. How did they react?" you stifled a yawn.
Tom's eyebrows furrowed at your response, "Y-you're not mad?"
You chuckled, "Do you want me to be mad?"
"No, no, no." he quickly protested, "I just didn't know if you were ready to tell the world about us and I'm sorry for not informing you before making that big of a step in our relationship."
You smiled at the caring boy in your life. His thoughtfulness overpowering any negative emotions that could've surfaced. You weren't mad at all. Two years was a long time to keep a relationship hidden especially when both of the parties are well known to the public.
"No need to apologize, mi amor. It was about time everyone found out. Long overdue if you ask me. I would've appreciated a heads up, but I'm not mad." you insisted, and it was true.
Tom visibly relaxed at your words, "The audience was shocked and some gushed and screamed. Can't wait to see the headlines and news articles tomorrow."
"I can see it now: 'Spider-Man Actor, Tom Holland and Actress, Y/N Y/L/N's Hidden Love'." you spoke in a mocking voice making your boyfriend laugh.
"Can't forget; 'All the evidence of their relationship that the public overlooked'." he joked in the same tone as you both laughed together joyously.
Your laughter died down while a peaceful smile lingered on your lips, "I'm glad you had fun tonight. I should get some rest. Need to be in hair and makeup at seven."
He nodded understandingly, "Have fun on set, darling. I'll talk to you later. Goodnight, sleep tight, sweet dreams."
"Goodnight, sleep tight, sweet dreams, lover." you gave a little wave before ending the call.
#tom holland#tom holland x reader#tom holland x famous!reader#tom holland x y/n#tom holland x singer!reader#tom holland fanfiction
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