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starshapedkookie · 4 years

Text

Falling

↳soulmate (noun): a person who is bound to another through the strongest level of emotional and physical connection. one is given a name on the body upon 18 years of age and any transgressions against the laws of soul-bonding will not occur without harm.

REPOSTED/REWRITTEN FROM OLD BLOG

pairing: jungkook x female reader

word count: 31.4k (sorry guys, another monster lol)

genre: soulmate/destiny au, college au, photographer jungkook, angst, fluff, smut

warnings: smut (protected sex, vanilla, light choking), swearing, angst!!!, fluff (jungkook is head over heels), drinking, mentions of anti-depressants and therapy

recommended songs: falling by harry styles, love again by dua lipa, hold on by chord overstreet, dusk till dawn by zayn & sia, when we were young by lost kings

FALL

The last thing you needed this morning was for your coffee to get knocked out of your hand and crash onto the pavement—but of course, that is exactly what happened.

“Ugh,” you groan loudly, bending down to pick up the plastic cup. You did not have time for this. It wasn’t even your first day of classes yet here you were, making a fool of yourself in front of everyone. You quickly dispose of the plastic in a recyclable can before hurrying off to find your class. You were already going to be late—but you knew you didn’t want to be that kid on the first day coming in hungover and 20 minutes late. So far though, that was going to be exactly you.

You rush into the building of your class before rushing up the stairs to the main auditorium. You glance down at your watch and you roll eyes. 7 minutes late—that’s doable right? You enter the large room and you curse to yourself when it’s quiet and the only words are coming from your professors mouth.

“Class I believe we’ve found our first day straggler,” the professor’s voice erupts in the room through his microphone and you freeze in your spot. Everyone’s eyes are on you and you actually want to crawl into a hole and bury yourself alive. Laughter fills the room and the professor goes back to the syllabus as you find a seat towards the back of the classroom. You sit down by yourself and lean back in the seat. Not only was your head absolutely busting from last night, you also had never felt more embarrassment in your entire life. You pull out your laptop and pull up the uploaded syllabus and try to hide yourself within your t-shirt.

“As humans, we think attraction is spontaneous and comes from here,” your professor pauses and points to his chest where his heart would be, “When in fact, that’s not true. Our brains run complex calculations that decide whom we think is attractive. This is what this course is about. The psychology behind gender, sex, and even the ideals of soulmates are all very much correlated in this course,” your ears drown out his talking once the ’S’ word is mentioned—no, not sex, but soulmate.

Soulmates—self explanatory but usually not discussed out in the open like this. Some people believed in them, others didn’t. Growing up, you had always heard about soulmates and their stories—your parents managing to bring it up at least once a week. It’s said that one will receive a name by 18. At 13, you and your older sister decided that it was all bogus as you had many crushes on boys growing up. You could like someone but that didn’t mean you were soulmates though. Your sister quickly flipped her stance about soulmates when she was 17, you 15, and suddenly a mark showed up on the inside of her finger. Not just any mark—but a name. With the name engraved in her skin like a tattoo and only a few months after that, she had met her match.

You on the other hand remained nameless for the rest of high school. You waited and waited for a name to show up by the age of 18—but it never did. You felt alone and like a glitch. At 19, you decided you weren’t going to sit around and wait for a soulmate. Besides, you were young—since when did you have to find your life partner so soon?

Now at 21, nearing 22, you were still nameless. Did it bother you? You were indifferent. You felt lucky to be able to experience college without being tied down to something serious but now as graduation was coming faster than ever and it seemed like everyone around you was finding their other half—worry did sink into your skin sometimes.

“You,” someone snaps you from your reverie and you think the professor has called you again until you see a two guys sitting two rows back from you, one of them pointing at you.

You point at yourself wondering if he’s got the right girl. As you look around the class, everyone is shuffling around to what seems to be small groups. Had you zoned out that bad? You look back at the two guys and gather your belongings before heading their way.

“Uh, hi?” You say awkwardly as you shuffle towards them.

“Told you she’d come,” one guys nudges the other one with a smirk, “Wanna be in our group?”

“Group?” You look back to the front of the classroom and see a slide displayed “FINAL PROJECT” shining bright. “Yeah, sure whatever,” you sit down beside of the chatty male before he finally introduces himself.

“I’m Namjoon,” he smiles.

“Y/N,” you reply looking at the other guy who has stayed silent this whole interaction.

“This is Jungkook,” Namjoon says and Jungkook looks at you offering a weak smile.

“Hey,” he says simply. Jungkook has pretty eyes, round and doe-like, innocent yet inviting. You catch yourself noticing the ink lining his forearms and knuckles.

You take a seat beside of Namjoon and focus your attention back to the board. Your professor explains each group has a variety of topics to choose from and present to him later at the end of the semester. As much as you weren’t in the mood for much talking, you were thankful this Namjoon and Jungkook guy asked you to be in their group because you’re not sure you would have had the courage to ask anyone else.

Lecture ends with an online syllabus quiz due at the end of the week and you quickly gather your things to leave.

“Um,” you start before you get ready to leave, “here's my number. Just text whenever you want to get started,” you slip the piece of paper to Namjoon. Your eyes meet Jungkook’s again and something stirs deep within your stomach. Namjoon’s voice breaks your gaze.

“Alright, sounds good. Nice to me you.”

“You guys too.” And then you’re off to your next class, hoping you won’t cause as much attention in that one.

“Jesus Christ,” you exhale deeply, lying down on Taehyung’s bed. He eyes you from his desk.

“Rough first day?” He inquires, swirling back and forth in his chair.

“You have no idea Tae,” you groan rolling over to look at him. “I should have known this day would be shit the second I slept through my alarm.”

He gives you a small smile, “At least it’s over now. You got much homework?”

You shake your head, “No thank god.”

“Do you want to grab dinner with Jimin and I then?”

Your stomach growls loudly at the idea of food. You don’t even say anything and you don’t need to. Taehyung gives you a laugh before slipping on his ridiculously ugly fur-lined Gucci mules. You stand up from his bed, straightening out your giant t-shirt and running shorts. Yours and Taehyung’s fashion clashed tremendously, but that’s what made you guys—well you.

You and Taehyung meet Jimin at a Thai place downtown. It’s cheap and delicious and a bowl of pad-thai to sooth your brain after today sounded heavenly. Jimin is standing outside, wearing a put together yet sporty outfit. He smiles when he sees the two of you approaching.

“Hey guys!” Jimin smiles widely, leaning over to give you a tight squeeze. He pulls away and gives Taehyung an even bigger hug, the two of them pecking each other on the lips quickly. You watch the two soulmates in awe. As much as you wanted to believe the soulmate thing was bullshit—these two were living proof that it works. And deep down, it hurts.

The three of you order your food and lean back into your chair across from the two lovers as they converse about their day.

“What about you Y/N? Did you have a good first day?” Jimin asks. He’s got to the be the most considerate person you’ve ever met.

“Are you sure you want to hear her spiel?” Taehyung mutters sarcastically and you poke your tongue out at him.

“It was horrible Jimin,” you pout, “First, I slept through my alarm which I never do, was hungover as sit so I needed some coffee and then I got my iced coffee that was five dollars and then dropped it everywhere—“

“Wait, you were running late and still got coffee?” Jimin raises an eyebrow.

“Yeah?” You say in a duh-like tone. Jimin and Taehyung laugh at your before you continue.

“Then I walked into my first class and the fucking professor had the audacity to call me the first day straggler! How awful is that?!”

“I mean it’s true,” Taehyung grins and you flip him off.

“Not. The. Point,” you offer dramatically, “And then all of a sudden these two guys are calling me over to be in their group for a project and they’re both extremely cute although one talked way too much and one didn’t talk at all—“ “Which one was cuter?” Jimin asks curiously. Taehyung swats at his arm.

“The quiet one,” you admit, “At least to me. And then after that, I went to my last class and that went smoothly. However it started going downhill again when I went and grabbed lunch and I got a salad from East—“ “Oh no,” Jimin groans, “East dining hall? Y/N you know that place is whack.”

“I know that but I was hungry! And then I ate my salad and then while I was driving back to my apartment I literally almost shit myself.”

The three of you begin to laugh at how ridiculous your day actually was.

“I mean what kind of fucking luck is that?!”

“You’ve definitely had better days for sure…” Taehyung says eying you from across the table, “I mean look at that outfit and hair,” he tsks.

“Hey! Fuck you,” you pick up your straw wrapper and throw it at him across from you. He’s laughing just as your food arrives. It looks and even smells better, the three of you immediately digging in.

The three of you continue small chatter amongst yourselves, Jimin and Taehyunf being too cute and in love for their own good. You are in the middle of slurping your noodles when your nearly choke on your food when a new, but familiar face walks into the restaurant. The Jungkook guy from your class. And he’s not alone as a girl who is extremely pretty trails in behind of him.

“What are you looking at?” Taehyung asks and he turns over his shoulder to follow your line of sight. “Who is that cutie?” He then says. Jimin agrees.

“It’s the guy from my class,” you whisper, hoping he doesn’t spot you. “The quiet one,” you specify. Jimin smirks before nudging Taehyung.

“You’re right,” Taehyung says looking back at you. For some reason, despite not knowing anything about Jungkook but his name, you dislike the way the random girl is looking at him. It doesn’t settle well in your stomach.

“Guess he has a soulmate,” you say slightly disappointed staring into your food.

Jimin speaks up, “No he doesn’t.”

You and Taehyung furrow your eyebrows at him.

“Are you guys forgetting soulmates is literally what I’m doing my thesis on? I can spot them when I see them,” he says keeping his voice low, “That’s not his soulmate, trust me.”

“…Right,” you hesitate. You glance back towards Jungkook and his date to find that they have been seated elsewhere in the restaurant. You bite your lip, stirring your noodles around, the weird feeling you felt when you first spotted Jungkook still deep rooted in your stomach. You don’t mention Jungkook again the entire night, only sparing glances around the restaurant to get another look at him. You come up short.

Your first week back at school is nearly over as Friday approaches faster than ever. Thankfully, unlike your first day shambles, the rest of your week went fairly smooth. You’ve managed to get ahead in most of your classes already and you can’t wait for the afternoon nap you’re gifting yourself later today.

Ever since Monday, you have decided to sit beside Namjoon and Jungkook in your psychology lecture now. They were easy to talk to, albeit Jungkook still quite shy, but being with your final project group was convenient. Speaking of Jungkook—he was no where to be seen today.

“Where’s your friend?” You inquire as you sit beside Namjoon. Normally Jungkook is right beside of him as the two of them always get to class earlier than you.

Namjoon shrugs, “I don’t know, he didn’t answer any of my texts this morning.”

You brush it off as your jackass of a professor begins his lecture. Your first official lecture of the semester is on the basis of the human brain and it’s connection to relationships. You nearly roll your eyes out of your head, how fun. Ten or so minutes go back of you typing up notes trying to keep up with him until rummaging disrupts your thoughts.

You glance to your left and spot Jungkook coming in late, his hair underneath a baseball cap, keeping his eyes down as he makes his way over to you and Namjoon. You inwardly wish the professor would call him out on his tardiness but of course, that doesn’t happen. Maybe your professor is a jackass and a sexist?

“Look who is late today,” You whisper as he sits down beside you. His brown eyes give you a glance before nodding to Namjoon.

“Sorry,” he gives you a soft smile, “Today has not been my day,” he briefly explains.

You raise your eyebrows as him, but decide against questioning him.

“I get it,” you respond.

“Hey! You in back,” your professor is suddenly stopping his lecture and pointing his finger towards you. Oh for fucks sake. “If you’re going to talk in my class, don’t bothering coming as I post the lecture slides online afterwards.”

You feel embarrassment taking over your body as Namjoon to your right is snickering at you and Jungkook on your left is sending you an apologetic stare.

Definitely sexist.

The next couple weeks of classes went by in a flash. So far, they were all going well and you liked all your professors—minus Mr. Sexist Jackass for psychology—but other than that, you were having no trouble. You had been able to meet other people and get into study group chats which you knew would help in the next few weeks as your first midterm was quickly approaching.

If there was one thing you were slacking on though, it was your group project for said psychology class. Which is why you texted Namjoon and Jungkook to meet at a coffee place on campus to discuss getting started and what roles you all would take.

“Hey,” Jungkook is the first to arrive and you give him a sweet smile. Within the past two weeks, he had become more open to talking to you and you sensed a blossoming friendship between you and him.

“Hi, how are you?” You ask him as you move your stuff out of the way so he could sit down. He sits across from you, his eyes meeting yours.

“I’m alright,” he says with not much energy taking a gulp from whatever drink he was sipping on. It looked to be an iced americano. “You?”

“Pretty good, although I’m already stressed about exams coming up,” you let your worries slip from you.

Jungkook shakes his head, “I haven’t thought about exams yet,” he says honestly.

You give him a hard stare before saying, “What even is your major? I know Namjoon is pre-med but I don’t think you’ve told me.”

He swallows the rest of his drink, “Sports medicine,” he responds with a straight smile.

“Hm,” you say, “So do you dress up as Sporty Spice for Halloween then?”

He lets out a laugh before nodding, “Yeah, every year.”

You laugh with him and you can’t help but notice how great his smile is. He really is attractive, you can’t deny that.

“Where the fuck is Namjoon?” You groan after your laughter dies out, looking down at your watch.

“Here!” You jump in your seat as Namjoon comes up behind you and you nearly fall out of your seat. Namjoon apologizes quickly about being late before scooting to sit beside you.

“Don’t worry about it,” you shake your head, “So, when do you guys want to start working on our project? I would hate for us to procrastinate and have to cram at the end of the semester.”

Namjoon nods, “I was thinking the same. We need to choose a topic first though… got any ideas?” He takes out a pen and notepad to scribble stuff down. You could tell Namjoon was just as studious as you were… Jungkook on the other hand was definitely more of a “go with the flow” type of student—not necessarily a bad thing though.

“Kook, any ideas?” Namjoon asks and Jungkook shrugs before throwing out there—

“Sex,” He says and you snicker at his suggestion. “What? That’s all the professor talks about, might as well give him something he’s interested in…” Jungkook retaliates.

You glance at Namjoon and he rolls his eyes.

“I get what you’re saying Kook but I think we should be more specific than that,” Namjoon deadpans and you nod agreeing with him. “Y/N?”

“Mmmm,” you hum, “Maybe we could do research on how sex differs between different people?”

Namjoon nods slowly, looking over at Jungkook quickly, “What if looked at how sex affects the body when it comes to soulmates?”

You throat goes dry at Namjoon’s suggestion and you have to compose yourself so you won’t give yourself away. You look over at Jungkook who looks just as uncomfortable as you do and it makes you furrow your eyebrows. Maybe Jimin’s sixth sense was right?

“I mean is there even research for that?” You look at him, your question somewhat patronizing.

“Oh yeah,” he says matter-of-factly, “There’s lots of research on how the body responds when people are intimate with people that aren’t their soulmates.”

You glance at Jungkook again whose eyes are dancing around the room and you’re not even sure he’s tuned into the conversation anymore.

“What do you think Jungkook?” You ask him.

“Sure,” he says, “Whatever will get us the grade.”

“Alright then, let’s meet up again next week after we each do some research,” Namjoon smiles before gathering his things up, “I hate to bounce like this but my tutoring shift starts in ten minutes and those freshman are so gullible I can make twice as much money off of them,” he says before waving you two off, leaving you and Jungkook alone.

“Does he really scam freshman?” You ask, somewhat horrified at his statement. Jungkook lets out a laugh, visibly a lot more comfortable now that the previous conversation has passed.

“Only when then they’re dumb enough,” he responds before he begins to gather his things too, “See in you class?”

You nod once, noticing what seems to be a silver Rolex covering his left wrist. Who the hell has a Rolex in college?

“See you in class.”

. “Well, well look who the cat dragged in?” Jimin smiles at you from behind the bar. Yeah—not only was Jimin currently getting his master’s in psychology, he also bartended on the weekends at one of your local bars.

You give him a smile as Taehyung isn’t far behind you, putting his head on your shoulder to look up at the menu.

“Hi babe,” Jimin smiles and Taehyung returns one, wrapping his arms around your front.

“Hi,” he smiles, visibly much more drunk than you were. “I’m pretending she’s you so don’t get jealous okay?” He slurs.

“Hey!” You fight back looking at Taehyung, “Crazy how people change after you ‘fall in love’,” you air quote yourself with sarcasm.

Taehyung laughs in your ear, “You should try it sometime babe,” under normal circumstances, you would have felt very offended at his remark because he knows your situation but with alcohol running through your veins—you let it slide.

“Can I have two green tea shots?” You ask Jimin and he nods quickly.

“Make it four,” Taehyung orders and Jimin laughs before nodding, heading off to make your shots.

Taehyung finally lets go of your middle and you both settle to lean on the bar whilst your drinks are being made.

“How was your week babe?” Taehyung asks, “Better I presume? You look hot so I’m assuming all is well?” He raises an eyebrow at you.

You gives him a smile, glancing down at your outfit. Your mini-wrap skirt and skin tight tank top was as basic as it could get, but it made you look and feel good about yourself.

“Good as it gets Tae,” you say flinging your hair behind your shoulder. On a scale 1 to 10 of drunkeness, you were probably a good 5 but you knew once Jimin was finished with your shots, you would be closer to a 7 or 8.

“I know I’m going to sound fucking crazy right now but it’s kind of just registering what I said to you about falling in love and I did not mean it like that—“ “Taehyung it’s fine,” you shake your head, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“No,” he shakes his head, “It’s not… I’m sorry I’m just really drunk right now,” he groans almost painfully.

“I know,” you smile at him before noticing Jimin has come back with your shots. “And you’re about to be even more drunk so whatever you say, apologize for it now.”

He looks up at the ceiling closing his eyes, “I’m sorry to whoever for the dumb shit I will say the rest of the evening, amen.”

“He’s religious now?” Jimin asks scooting the glasses over to you two.

“Apparently,” you eye him before taking a glass for you and handing one to Taehyung.

“To… senior year!” Taehyung says loudly over the music and you nod, clinking your glasses together.

“To senior year!” You say before downing the shot in its entirety. “Oh my god Jimin,” you groan, “I will never forgive you for getting me on these.”

“What can I say? If you’re gonna drink might as well enjoy it,” is the last thing he says before checking on another customer beside you and Taehyung.

“Oh god,” Taehyung says after downing his shot, looking over your shoulder.

“What?” You ask him, getting ready to down your second one.

“It’s the quiet one, the cute one,” Taehyung’s words confuse you until you begin to piece them together. Quiet… cute… Jungkook.

You take a glance over your shoulder and you nearly jump out of your skin when you see Jungkook looking right back at you. He gives you a small wave and smile and you do the same. He looks really good—blue jeans a t-shirt with his lovely ink being show. What intrigues you the most though is a 35mm camera hanging around his neck. You don’t recognize any of the people he is with before you turn back around, feeling your cheeks heat up even though no one could see it.

“Jungkook,” you say to Taehyung, “That’s his name.”

As much as you wished Taehyung would stop staring in his direction, you knew he was drunk and fighting him on it wouldn’t get you anywhere.

“Well, I think Jungkook,” Taehyung grabs his second shot, “Is hot as fuck and you should totally make a move,” Taehyung finally looks back at you and downs his liquor without waiting on you. You follow suit, the shot slivering down your throat.

“No,” you shake your head, “I don’t think he’s into me, plus I don’t even know if he has a partner or not.”

“You heard what Jimin said a couple weeks ago,” he retorts.

“How does Jimin know he’s right? I mean it’s not like we as humans have a fucking ‘yeah I have a soulmate’ scent to us like were goddamn dogs or something. I mean as much as I would totally make a move on him, I just don’t think I can do—“

“Uh, Y/N,” Taehyung nudges you from your rant.

“What?” You return harshly. A small smirk rises on his face before he points beside of you. You look to your left and your eyes widen when you see Jungkook coming up behind of you.

“J-Jungkook,” you manage to get out, “Hi.”

He approaches you and Taehyung with a warm smile, “Hey Y/N.” His eyes move to Taehyung and you clear your throat to introduce them.

“Jungkook this is Taehyung, Taehyung… Jungkook,” you smile between the two handsome men.

“Nice you to meet you,” Taehyung smiles widely and Jungkook nods.

“What are you doing out tonight?” You ask Jungkook and he steps closer to you as someone pushes past him.

“Trying to relieve some stress,” he answers with a laugh, “Can I get you a drink?” He scratches the back of his head, glancing over at Taehyung again.

“Oh, are you sure?” You ask him before he nods again. You give him a smile, “Alright, whatever you’re having I’ll have.”

“Jimin!” You yell over the music to get his attention. He stops drying a glass and immediately comes to you, his eyes falling on the companion behind of you.

“Can I get two Michelob's?” Jungkook says and you can feel his chest pressing into your back as the overwhelming amount of people pushing and pulling in the bar.

Jimin nods before quickly going into the cooler, popping the tops from the bottle and sliding them over to you.

“Thanks,” you both say grabbing them.

“Thank you,” you turn around to Jungkook and in this position, you underestimated how close you actually are to him. Chest to chest and his head towers over as he looks down at you with a smile.

“No problem,” he says, “Do you wanna go outside? Get some air and more space?”

It’s like he read your mind. “Yeah, sure.”

You tap Taehyung on the shoulder to get his attention from Jimin.

“I’m going outside, I’ll text you if I can’t find you again.”

He nods slowly, “I’ll be right here babe,” he sends you a wink before turning back around.

Jungkook’s eyes lay on Taehyung’s back a little longer than you would like. What’s he thinking right now? Without any warning, Jungkook grabs your hand gently and starts pulling you away from the crowded bar. You aren’t exactly sober right now and you can only hope that your hand isn’t sweating as much as you think it is. Jungkook leads you out to the deck that’s also crowded and loud, but leaves a lot more room to breathe.

You lean against the railing and Jungkook does the same across from you, just mere inches separating the two of you.

“Are you here with just Taehyung?” He asks you taking a sip of his beer. You follow suit. Thank god he ordered Michelob—a man with taste.

You nod, “Yeah… he wanted to go out more than I did but, here we are,” you try to make a joke at your drunkeness but fail miserably. Jungkook gives you a short lived smile.

“So… are you two like, together?” Jungkook says his words slowly, not wanting to say or imply the wrong thing. Your eyes nearly pop out of your head after he asks his question.

You start to laugh, having to cover your mouth so you don’t cackle loud enough to draw attention. Jungkook looks confused before you say—

“Taehyung’s gay,” you explain after your laughter dies down, “His partner is the bartender Jimin.”

Jungkook’s face falls and his doe eyes bulge out of his head. “Holy shit I didn’t know, I didn’t mean—“

“Jungkook it’s fine,” you wave him off, “You’re not the first person to ever ask if Tae and I are a thing. As much as I wish the universe was that nice to me to give me a man like Taehyung but no,” you smile although deep down it does hurt. You grew up with Taehyung hoping he would be your soulmate and when Jimin’s name appeared on the inside of his pinky, that dream bursted real fast.

“What about you?” You ask him. Now’s your chance. It’s got to be the alcohol that’s making this conversation easy as cake because normally, talk of this nature would not be spoken in public with this many people around.

Jungkook rolls his tongue in his cheek and you swear your heart skips a beat. He starts to shake his head, “No I just got out of a relationship.”

“Oh,” your face falls. So was he with a girlfriend at dinner a few weeks back?

“Yeah I guess the universe hates me too,” he says nonchalantly and the air suddenly feels thick with tension. So he didn’t have a soulmate? Nor did you? What were the odds?

“I hate to sound weird or creepy but,” you pause, unsure if you wanted to ask but internally you say fuck it. “I saw you a few weeks ago at the Thai place downtown with a girl, so that’s why I asked.”

Jungkook’s eyes are hard to read as he gulps his beer. You’re not sure he’s that drunk but if he is, he’s great at hiding it.

“Yeah… that was her,” he nods, “But like I said the universe is cruel and decide to give her a name after a couple months of dating,” he scoffs and almost seems angry—which I guess he has a right to be.

“Oh shit,” you mumble, “I’m sorry,” you offer.

He shakes his head, “It’s fine, what can I do about it now you know?”

You nod slowly, “Look forward to the future? Who knows what might happen.”

“You’re right,” he smiles tenderly, “To the future?” He raises his bottle.

“To the future,” you smile clinking the glass together.

“So who are you here with?” You ask him.

“Just my roommates, Yugyeom and Mingyu,” he explains while licking his lips and your heart skips a beat again.

“You don’t strike me as the type that gets out much you know,” you push a finger into his chest, narrowing your eyesight. 1 to 10 on the drunk scale? An 8 or 9 at the moment.

“Why’s that?” He amuses.

“Jeon, you barely spoke to me the first two weeks of class. I thought you were fucking mute.”

He suddenly steps closer to you and it forces you to drop your finger.

“I’m shy okay?” He says with a pout. “I’m good now though? Right?” You swear his eyes are like a damn puppy dog looking at you like that. Your throat goes dry before you nod.

“For the most part I guess,” you offer weakly batting your eyelashes at him. You glance down his body quickly and notice the way his light blue jeans hug his tiny waist and thick thighs deliciously. Jesus fucking Christ.

“What this all about?” you point to his camera that’s dangling between his pecs. You needed to get your mind back to PG and fast.

He smiles lightly, “My hobby,” he says simply, “I like to take pictures for memories sake.”

“Memories sake,” you repeat, “So do you take it with you everywhere then?”

“Only if I think something interesting might happen that needs to be captured,” he shrugs. God he was so attractive and the longer you stared at him, the faster you were falling down a hole.

“What have you captured tonight then?”

“Nothing much really,” he glances down your front quickly and he thinks you don’t notice until you smirk at him.

“Take a picture of me,” you tilt your head with a smile, “I’m a treasure that should be captured, don’t ya think?” the alcohol was getting to you bad. When Jungkook laughs at you, you swear you saw two faces and you knew you needed to sober the fuck up.

“Alright, fine,” he says, stepping away from you to adjust his lens for the lighting. You lean onto the railing with you elbow, giving him a smile when you look towards his camera. He snaps the picture twice and the flash momentarily blinds you. He looks back at his view finder and you step to him to see it.

“See, a treasure,” you say.

He nods slowly before looking down at you, “Definitely.”

You feel yourself stepping closer to him, leaning up to get a full view of his face. You bite your lip as he leans down, your noses brushing together before you step back.

“Wait… so you don’t have a soulmate?” You keep your voice low and hesitant.

He shakes his head, “No,” he says, “See.” He shows his wrists and in between his fingers and nothing. You do the same for him, moving your bracelets and watch back. He gives you a small smirk before leaning down to close the gap between the two of you. You inhale his clean scent as you push up on your toes to deepen the kiss. With your hand that isn’t occupied you bring it to the side of his face to caress his skin. His lips are so fucking soft and you whine as he pulls away.

“I would ask you to go home with me but I think you’re too drunk,” he says honestly and you furrow your eyebrows at him with a sad pout.

“Hey I’m fine,” you defend yourself.

“I just don’t want you to think I’m that type of guy,” he says, “I’m pretty far from that.”

His words are sweet and considerate and you’re not sure any guy you have met that would be in this position to not jump straight into your pants. As much as you wouldn’t mind Jungkook to do that—you could see where he was coming from. Besides, you were really drunk and really tired so you probably wouldn’t even get off which would defeat the purpose of getting laid.

“Jungkook I know, I can see that,” you tell him before you bite your lip again, “But I am a great cuddlier if that has any weight?”

A large smile falls on his lips and his nose scrunches up from giggling. “Alright, you’re the big spoon though,” he deadpans.

You roll your eyes, “We’ll see about that.” Jungkook smirks before grabbing your hand for both of you to close out your tabs and head to his place.

You wake up the next morning in an unfamiliar, but quite comfortable bed. You blink your eyes slowly to let light in and you stretch your feet our from your fetal position. Once your vision focuses you see that you’re alone underneath a grey duvet and you nearly freak out until you quickly remember your previous evening.

You had got to Jungkook’s place around 12:30 AM and aside from light making out, nothing extreme happened between you two as Jungkook insisted on being sober before going there. He obviously lost the argument about who was going to be the big and little spoon as you both fell asleep comfortably with his arms around your front. Speaking of—where was he?

You push the covers from your body and see you’re dressed in an oversized t-shirt, your clothes neatly folded on his dresser. You memory is slightly fuzzy, unsure if you changed your clothes yourself or if Jungkook dressed you. Heat rushes to you face at the thought. Damn, you hoped you hadn’t seemed desperate but when you were drunk—that tended to happen. Although not as much anymore as random hookups slowed down the older you got as most people were linking up with their destined lovers.

Fuck—you think, you had nearly forgotten perhaps the biggest detail of last night. Jungkook didn’t have a soulmate. The thought made you giddy on the inside. Maybe he was just as fucked up as you were.

You’re about to leave Jungkook’s room until he suddenly appears in the doorway.

“Oh, hey I was just coming to see if you were up,” he gives you a soft smile and you have to scramble your eyes away from his heavily built chest and torso. You find that he has tattoos all the way up his knuckles to his shoulder. Fuck.

“I just woke up,” you mumble stepping towards the door.

“I made some breakfast,” he says reaching towards your hand gently, “I have some medicine too if you’re hungover.”

You smile at him as he pulls you to him to walk you down the short hallway to his kitchen. It smelt of bacon, eggs, and toast—just what you needed.

“Thanks,” you say gratefully as you take a seat on one of his barstools. He slides a plate over to you as well as a bottle of Advil. “You already ate?” You ask him as you begin to dive into the food that will surely settle your rumbling stomach.

“Sorry,” he laughs, “I woke up awhile ago and went for a run so I had to eat.”

You swat your hand not caring, “It’s fine—wait, what time is it?” Your eyes bulge.

He looks at his silver watch, “Almost noon,” he says, his eyes not looking at tired as he probably is.

“Noon?!” You say with a mouthful of bread, “What the hell I never this sleep this late…” you say after swallowing.

“You drank a lot last night Y/N,” he laughs at you and you give him your middle finger. He rests on his hands across from you in the kitchen and you can’t help but notice the veins in his arms. Was the universe really being this good to you? After all this time, giving you access to someone who is this fine and who doesn’t have a partner? You almost couldn’t believe it.

“Sorry if I was annoying, or needy, or anything like that,” you say somewhat embarrassed that Jungkook had to deal with you even though neither of you know each other that well.

His eyes soften, “It’s fine. You were funny.”

You’ve devoured your plate of food and you hop down from the barstool to clean your plate. Since he cooked, the least you could was put away your mess.

“Oh I’m hilarious,” you give him a snide look before you bump him with your hip to scoot him over so you can wash your plate. He obliges whilst watching your every move. Jungkook seeing you in one of his favorite t-shirts is driving him delirious.

“But seriously though,” your voice cuts his inappropriate train of thought, “If I said anything incriminating, don’t tell anyone,” you give him a side look as you dry your plate. Jungkook laughs before a smirk appears on his face.

“I quite enjoyed your rambling,” he steps closer to you as you turn to look up at him. “It was very… what’s the word… suggestive,” he looks off as if he’s running deep thoughts.

You roll your eyes—yup, definitely horny and needy words were said. Feeling somewhat brave—maybe it was because you weren’t really hungover and the fact that Jungkook is standing there like that in front of you—you step towards him so your chests are touching.

“Maybe you should remind me what I said one day then?” You whisper only so he can hear. He chuckles through his nose before placing one of his hands on your back to pull you flush against him.

“Why not right now?” He says, his nose dipping to touch yours. His eyes are soft but carry a darkness to them you can’t quite read. You give him a small nod before you move your head to place your lips on his. Your mouths mold together like putty slowly before he slips his tongue into your mouth to tease you.

You pull away quickly, “Wait, don’t you have roommates?” You whisper again looking around the quiet apartment. You noticed how clean it was to be housed by 3 men in their early twenties.

“They’re asleep,” he says, caressing your lower back, his hand begging to go to your ass but he restrains himself. “So you’ll have to be quiet, unlike last night,” he raises an eyebrow at you.

“Challenge accepted,” you grab his face to pull him back down to you to connect your lips once more.

His hands grapple your waist desperately to pull you flush against him. He smells like laundry and cotton, the scent driving you mad. As Jungkook realizes that the two of you are still in his kitchen and Yugyeom or Mingyu could easily come out of their rooms any moment, he pulls away from you and you follow him back into his room. He wastes no time shutting his door and pushing you against it.

You felt yourself growing dizzier by the second as he continued to kiss you with a gentle force that you’ve never experienced before. He was probably the best kisser you’ve ever kissed. You could tell he wanted to touch you and you wanted him to touch you so you began to trace your hands up his sculpted back and pushing your hips out towards him.

Jungkook now having your permission, one of his hands trail up your thigh to push his t-shirt away from your backside, his large hand massaging the skin carefully and calculated. Suddenly you found his lips on your neck as he pushes your body further into his door.

“Jungkook,” you groaned quietly as he nipped at the sensitive skin. He pulls your thigh up against his leg and you nearly let out a moan when you feel his hardening cock press into your center.

“Fuck,” you breathe out as you let out an experimental roll of your hips against his. Jungkook pulls back with a short chuckle before kissing your lips gently again.

“Quiet,” he laughs again and you push his chest away from yours to get him to sit on the edge of his bed. You crawl onto his lap, straddling his tiny waist and thick thighs. You continued to kiss like no tomorrow before you placed your palm over his center.

“Shit,” he groans into your mouth as you palm him slowly and torturously. “Y/N, wait, are you sure?”

You pull your hand back and stare down at him with hazy eyes. You nod frantically, “Yes, are you?”

“God yes,” he breathes out and in one smooth motion, he flips you two over with him standing in between your legs. He begins to take his shirt from your body and you happily help him and his eyes immediately go to your breasts, your nipples taut for him.

He kisses you again before kissing down your neck and then down over your boobs, his tongue swirling and his teeth nipping at all the right places. Jungkook finds himself on his knees, right in front of where you need each other most. He spreads your legs a little more before he goes right in to kiss your center over your underwear. Your head falls back as you rest on your hands watching him bite his lip in excitement. You’d never had a guy go down on your the first hookup—you thought you could be in love right now.

His brown eyes glance at you briefly before you nod for him to make sure what he was going was okay. He fingers pull at your underwear and you lift your hips to help him drag the material down your legs. He grabs your hips and pulls your towards him, his mouth going straight to work on you.

You shut your eyes at the feeling unable to keep them open as he laps up and down your slit. He kisses you with hunger and when he finds your clit, the moan that escapes your mouth is loud and embarrassing.

“Oh god, Jungkook,” he smirks against your pussy before continuing to lap at your sensitive bud, his fingers now teasing your entrance.

He slips in one finger, pumping it slowly before entering a second—stretching you just how you need. You fall back on your elbows and your toes curl when you feel an orgasm close approaching.

“Fuck, fuck,” your hips raise as he focuses on your clit, his eyes never leaving your face. He can tell you’re about to come and he’d be damned if he didn’t bring you there. Two more kitten licks send you over the edge and you climax hard having to bite your lip so you don’t make much noise.

Jungkook licks his lips as he comes back to you to kiss you. You welcome him with open arms and you pull him on top of you. You needed him now and the issue in his pants showed he wanted you just as much. You help him push down his sweats and boxers and when you first get sight of his dick, your mouth nearly drops. Okay—the universe was definitely helping you out right now.

You reach down between you, wrapping your hands around his girth to fully harden him. He sucks in a deep breath when you pull and tug at his sensitive skin. You take his pre cum on your thumb and rub it around to make the slip easier. His forehead falls against your shoulder as you continue to jerk him off. His breathing increases as each pull comes from your hand and he’ quickly pushing your hand away.

“I wanna be inside you baby,” he says and it sends a shockwave through your core.

Jungkook finds a condom from his side table and rolls it on quickly. He positions himself between you, his nose brushing against yours as he pecks your lips.

“Ready?” He asks you as he guides his tip into you. Both of your mouths fall agape, a small whine coming from Jungkook’s throat as he pushes deeper into you. “Fuck—Y/N, you’re so tight.”

You lift your hips to help him get as deep as possible and when he bottoms out, you’re unsure if you’ve ever felt this full your entire life. His forehead falls against your shoulder once more and he kisses your exposed skin gently as he starts to slowly thrust in and out of you.

He feels more than amazing and your whole body feels on fire.

“Jungkook,” you breathe out as you wrap your legs around his back, “Faster, please.” You don’t care about sounding desperate.

He sits up on his elbows and obeys, snapping his hips against you harder and quicker. You hold onto his cheeks, your fingertips pulling at his hair and neither of you can be quiet now.

“Shit,” he marvels at the way he disappears inside of you, your cunt squeezing around him so he won’t leave.

“Jungkook—ah,” he hits your deepest spot in you and he sticks his thumb in your mouth to bite down on to shut you up. His other fingers grip the side of your neck and you feel like you could pass out from his ministrations.

“I’m not gonna last much longer,” he whispers in your ear and you nod pulling his face down to you, snapping your hips to meet up with his. You found yourself clenching around his cock as Jungkook’s breaths get shakier and shakier. “Fuck Y/N.”

“Don’t stop,” you managed to get out as he hammered you into his mattress, hitting your g-spot perfectly—another orgasm quickly coming into your system. Jungkook’s face was contorted and tortured as he chased his high deep inside of you. “Come on Jungkook,” you whisper beside his ear and he lifts his head up, crashing his lips onto yours.

Between your desperate attempts to be quiet and Jungkook’s relentless pace, you come again around his cock fast and hard, pulsating around him in spurts.

“Ah—fuck,” Jungkook’s hips ram into yours deeply as he finally finds his release. He collapses on top of your frame, his elbows the only thing holding him up. He pulls himself out of you a moment later, but he doesn’t move his body from above you.

Both of you are breathing heavy, it being the only sound radiating in the room. You caress the right side of his face, pushing his bangs away from his forehead. He leans into your touch with a small smile before kissing your wrist gently. He then rolls his body from yours, discarding of his condom quickly.

You both turn to each other as Jungkook throws an arm lazily around your waist.

“Are you even real?” His deep voice suddenly says with his eyes closed. You give him a sheepish smile as he opens his eyes.

“The universe is fucking funny huh?” You say and Jungkook laughs deep within his chest.

“Very funny,” he mumbles before watching your face intently.

“Now what?” You ask obliviously. Sure, you had your hookups on and off before but with Jungkook—something felt different—in a good way. Like he wasn’t supposed to be a hookup—but something more.

He shrugs, “Whatever you wanna be.”

You bite your lip hesitating before saying, “I know you just got out of a relationship so I don’t want you to feel rushed or anything.”

“It’s fine Y/N,” he gives you a small smile, “I’m fine with whatever you’re fine with. As long as you don’t break my heart.”

You laugh, swatting at his chest playfully, “You mean as long as you don’t break my heart.”

He smirks, “Deal.”

You meet with Namjoon and Jungkook the following week to begin working on your project. You three decided on meeting in the library after all of your classes were over for the day to keep it convenient. You and Jungkook finished around the same time and ended up grabbing some food before heading out to the library. It had not been that long since you and Jungkook hooked up and you two began to text and Snapchat each other everyday. Your friendship with Jungkook hadn’t changed in any way as you two didn’t officially have a label yet, but now one look at him sent you weak to the knees.

“You guys seriously couldn’t wait for me to get food?!” Namjoon shows up on the second floor of the library around 6:25 PM. You and Jungkook laugh at him as he sits down. He looks exhausted.

“Rough day?” You ask him as he sits down from across from you and Jungkook.

He lets out a deep sigh, “Have you ever amputated a finger before?”

You and Jungkook give each other an odd glance before scrunching your nose, “No, what the fuck?” Jungkook mutters.

Namjoon gives you a straight smile, “Well how about 4 fingers? That was my day summed up and I still think I’m queasy,” he shakes his head slowly.

You furrow your eyebrows at him, “Joon, don’t you wanna be a doctor?”

“Family medicine, not surgery or anything gross like that,” he explains and that makes much more sense—though I’m sure Namjoon knows medical school has a lot more than family medicine waiting for him.

“Gotcha,” you pull up the documents you have saved for your research on your computer. Under the table, Jungkook nudges your knee with his and you have to fight the urge to smile.

Namjoon watches, the two of you oblivious.

“You look happy,” he says. Jungkook looks up from his phone and you from your screen.

“Who?” You and Jungkook same at the same time.

Namjoon narrows his eyes, “Both of you… strange,” he licks his lips pondering on his words.

You glance at Jungkook before turning back to your screen, not wanting to be caught in his stare.

“Am I not allowed to be in a good mood?” Jungkook laughs sarcastically.

You bite your lip trying to suppress your smile. Sure, you and Jungkook had hooked up once or twice now and you two were slowly getting to know each other more everyday—but you swore the butterflies in your stomach told you something was special about him.

“I mean, you’re just always so quiet… and—hey why are you laughing?” Namjoon looks at you with a serious expression.

“I’m not laughing,” you say, biting the inside of your cheek.

“Yeah Y/N, quit laughing,” Jungkook says, nudging your leg under the table again.

“God I’m gonna get queasy again,” Namjoon’s face contorts, his eyes darting between the two of you, “Since when do you two flirt with each other? In front of me?”

Once again, you keep your eyes away from Jungkook, “We’re not flirting,” you say monotonously.

Namjoon looks at Jungkook since you refuse to meet anyone’s gaze. Namjoon raises his eyebrows at his friend curiously, an unspoken language going between them. Jungkook smirks before giving you one last glance before he says—

“Y/N and I hooked up.”

Your eyes widen instantly at Jungkook’s words and you whip your head to turn towards him.

“Jungkook what the fuck! I thought we weren’t gonna tell anyone!” Your words give away to Namjoon that Jungkook wasn’t bluffing.

Jungkook’s eyes soften looking at you, “Come on, his crazy ass was onto us anyways,” he motions towards Namjoon.

“Yeah, uh huh. I knew something was off when Jungkook’s ears kept going red every time he looked at you,” Namjoon slowly starts to smile, “How disgusting is that.”

You flip him off, “Well, don’t tell anyone.”

“So,” Namjoon pauses, “You guys aren’t…?” He trails his question off and both of you know what he wants to say. Soulmates.

Slowly, you both shake your head. Namjoon is slightly confused himself. Normally by 18 years old people have their other half assigned to them—him included. His partner’s name appeared on the inside of his palm when he was 15. But you and Jungkook were almost 22?

“Do you guys have one? That you just haven’t met yet?” Namjoon keeps his question low.

Again, you both shake your heads. Wow, Namjoon thinks. An idea suddenly pops into his head.

“Wait so—I have an idea,” Namjoon’s eyes light up.

“Oh god,” Jungkook mumbles.

“So if you guys don’t have partners and you two keep… doing it,” he pauses with a laugh, “Couldn’t we use your experience in our project?”

It takes a few moments for Namjoon’s words to register as your mouth falls agape. Jungkook pinches the bridge of his nose, unsure if he heard Namjoon correctly.

“Hyung, didn’t you just hear her say not to tell anyone?” Jungkook deadpans.

“I mean we don’t have to specify names,” Namjoon quickly elaborates, “I mean you guys did some research right? You’ve read all the horrible stuff that happens to people who go against nature.”

Yeah, you did read about that stuff and it absolutely terrified you. But even after hooking up with Jungkook and other suitors in your life—nothing bad had happened to you, so if anything, this research exists to only frighten people.

“Namjoon, I get what you’re saying but—I don’t know, we might not even hook up again,” you laugh waving your hand off.

“Wait, why not?” Jungkook’s voice suddenly goes to a higher pitch, his eyes looking at you quickly. Namjoon chuckles at the exchange. Namjoon had known Jungkook a long time and he’s never seen him want this much validation from a female—ever.

“I mean,” you pause looking at the dark haired boy beside you, “I didn’t know if—“

“Yeah yeah, work out this shit later,” Namjoon interrupts, “But I don’t know, just something to keep in mind over the rest of the semester.”

With that, the conversation ended and the three of you managed to begin typing up your report. Occasionally, you would bump Jungkook’s knee here and there just to see his reaction. He would smile although not sparing a glance at you. By the end of your study session, all three of you got a good start on the project and Jungkook’s hand rested on your thigh the whole night and you knew it didn’t belong anywhere else.

Weeks later, yours and Jungkook’s relationship became slightly more complicated. While you two managed to stay cordial in class and hide whatever the hell was going on between you two—once you two were alone, all bets were fucking off. Jungkook would come to your place or you would go to his when his roommates were out and he would fuck you into the mattress until you were nearly screaming. It was good—he was good—and quickly you felt yourself starting to catch feelings for him. You knew that was dangerous territory considering a name might pop up on your body any day, so as hard as it was, you repressed your feelings for him. You were unsure of how Jungkook felt. As better as he was at talking now and he did trust you, he wasn’t one for deep talk unless he had a few glasses of wine in his system. You were fine with that though, knowing it was probably for the better.

You had thought everything was going good—Jungkook, classes, exams, your project, keeping up with Taehyung and Jimin—until it all came crashing down one afternoon at your apartment.

It was a Friday afternoon and you had invited Jungkook over to… well… get your brains fucked out. You like to think you are a smart girl but today, you were being a grade ass dumbass because you had completely forgotten about your lunch date with Taehyung and Jimin.

Normally, Taehyung wouldn’t have cared if you had missed one day with him but as your best friend of years and years—he noticed something had been off with you lately. Slightly more… flakey than normal. Jimin noticed it too. So when Taehyung found himself outside of your apartment that Friday afternoon, what he saw—shook him to his core.

You and Jungkook had just gotten out of the shower after going at it like bunnies for a good hour. He couldn’t keep his hands off of you, placing his lips around yours and down your neck, leaving barely there marks behind of your ears.

“Jungkook—stop,” you push his bare chest away as you heard someone knocking on your door. He gives you a shit-eating grin, staying back in the hallway as you go to the door, holding the towel up around your body tight.

You open the door and your face fell instantly. Fuck.

“Taehyung? Jimin?” Your voice shakes, “W-what are you doing here?”

Without any warning Taehyung and Jimin step into your apartment and you begin to panic.

“What the hell Y/N, you’ve bailed on us without explanation three times now!” Taehyung says dramatically, “I mean damn I know Jimin and I are disgusting sometimes but the least you can do is give a heads—what’s that?” Taehyung’s eyes land on your neck and you step away from him, holding your towel closer to you.

“N-nothing,” you stutter. “I’m s-sorry I forgot about lunch, I’ve been really busy lately,” your excuse is lame, but you have nothing else.

“Busy?” Taehyung says eyeing you up and down, “I can see that.”

“Y/N hey where is—“ your eyes roll into the back of your head as Jungkook enters your living room at just the wrong time. No, he didn’t know it was Taehyung and Jimin, but it still doesn’t make you happy. Especially since he’s just wearing sweatpants, his hair wet like yours, compromising your secret.

“Whoa,” Jimin suddenly laughs looking at the scene. “This the quiet one?” He points over at Jungkook. Jungkook pouts—what are they talking about?—he thinks to himself.

“Holy shit Y/N what are you doing?” Taehyung doesn’t seem as enthusiastic. He looks over at Jungkook and you swear you see Taehyung salivate inside his mouth, “I mean I get why you’re doing it but, c’mon isn’t this risky?”

“I know you’re probably confused,” you bite your lip nervously. “I shouldn’t have kept this from you.”

“Yeah no shit,” he genuinely seems angry, an emotion not common to him. “We’re best friends Y/N.”

“Tae, c’mon it’s really none of our business,” Jimin steps in trying to help you out.

“It is too my business when he could potentially hurt her,” Taehyung crosses his arms. Jungkook seems taken aback by his comment and he steps towards you from behind.

“I mean I like her,” Jungkook’s voice quickly speaks up, startling you from behind. You turn your body to look at him, his eyes meeting yours.

“You do?” Your voice comes out in a squeak, a smile spreading on your face like a wildfire.

“You do?” Taehyung asks this time, looking between you two. He looks at his partner Jimin who specializes in this stuff. Jimin nods at Taehyung for reassurance.

“Yeah, a lot actually,” Jungkook steps closer to you, throwing an arm around your shoulder to pull you close to his chest. You try to hide your embarrassingly huge smile.

Taehyung’s body visibly falters, his eyes going back to his usual soft gaze. Taehyung knew you deserved happiness and if Jungkook made you happy—who was he to stop that?

“I’m sorry again for keeping this from you, it’s just we didn’t want…”

“No I get it,” he nods, “But don’t do that shit again,” he gives you a smile. As warm as Jungkook’s embrace is, you step away and give yourself to Taehyung’s arms.

“You’re the best,” you mumble into his chest.

“Bitch, I know,” his chest rumbles against yours. Jungkook watches you and Taehyung embrace, his heart swelling. Goddamn—maybe he is in a little too deep. At this point, he doesn’t care though. If anything, he wants to make you happy and he’d be damned to let the universe stop that.

It was officially Halloween. Nearly three months after you and Jungkook first crossed paths and met, the two of you were also “official”. Neither of you can recall the exact date it happened, but it was not long after Taehyung and Jimin busted you two. You and Jungkook had decided to not tell that many people outside of your inner circle—neither of you wanting to deal with the glares and questions. You didn’t have a name attached on your body and he didn’t either, so what were you guys doing wrong? Nothing. He was yours and you were his and you haven’t been this happy in a long time.

Jungkook, though his Virgo nature being quite selfish sometimes, was always sweet, caring, checking in on you, surprising you with flowers, genuine, and opened up some of his deepest fears to you. You had been on cloud nine for months all because of him. You had probably thanked Namjoon at least six different occasions for dragging you over to meet them way back when. Namjoon was happy for you two—though being as quizzical as he was—he had his concerns, though he never outright voiced them.

Jimin being how he was, had his concerns too. Everyone around you and Jungkook saw how you two were infatuated around each other. Jimin had never seen two people who weren’t soulmates have the connection you two had. It worried him for many reasons, which is why he’s voicing them to Taehyung right now.

“Babe, I don’t know,” Jimin says as him and Taehyung somehow got on the topic of you and Jungkook. “Don’t you think they’re moving really fast?” He questions.

Taehyung looks at his partner, a confused expression crossing his features, “Why do you say that? As long as Y/N is happy, I don’t really care who dicks her down at night, soulmate or not.”

Jimin lets out a laugh before shaking his head, “I mean, in all my case studies I’ve never seen two people like that.”

Taehyung deadpans his boyfriend, “Jimin, you of all people should know that’s not true.”

Jimin nods, immediately understanding where he is coming from. “I know. I’m just worried one of them will get hurt. A name is destined to show up on them eventually.”

Taehyung grinds his teeth, “Y/N has never been one to feed into that stuff so I’m not sure she would care anyways.”

“But she should Tae,” Jimin says, “Jungkook too. I mean there’s serious repercussions to messing with nature.”

“Well they’re fine now, aren’t they?” by Taehyung’s response—Jimin isn’t even sure if he full listening to him. Taehyung being good with numbers and business, he doesn’t fully grasp the concepts of soulmates like Jimin does. For Jimin—it’s his studies, his passion, his life.

“Yeah but—“ Jimin gets cut off by a harsh knock on his apartment door.

“They’re here,” Taehyung smiles walking over to get the door, “Don’t say anything sketch okay?” he warns Jimin as he opens the door.

You nearly fall on your ass as Taehyung opens the door. Jungkook pulls you back with a laugh as you walk into Jimin’s apartment.

“Tae! Chim!” You smile widely, throwing your arms around Taehyung’s neck tightly. You stumble in your heels and Taehyung’s hands steady you, a rumble in his chest.

“Jesus Y/N. How much have you drank already?” He exasperates, glancing over at Jungkook.

“I told her to slow down,” Jungkook puts his hands up in defense. You giggle letting go of your friend to quickly hug Jimin too. “She doesn’t listen to me,” he adds with a laugh.

“I’m fine guys,” you say glancing at Taehyung’s and Jimin’s costumes.”Really? Pirates?”

“Hey!” Taehyung defends, “How much more cliché could you two get? A doctor and a nurse?!”

You glance over at Jungkook in his scrubs and white coat and down your body. A slutty red and white nurse’s uniform complete with thigh highs hug your figure and you quite liked it, mainly because watching Jungkook shift uncomfortably every time he glanced at you made you feel accomplished.

“Hey, we look hot,” you point at Taehyung’s chest, stumbling backwards again. Jungkook decides to pull you to his side, not wanting you to fall on your ass for real this time.

“Come on babe, slow down,” Jungkook mumbles as he wraps his arms around your front, glancing down your cleavage from behind. You nudge his stomach with your elbow.

“I’m a big girl,” you pout, “So are we going or what?”

“Yeah, just waiting on the address,” Jimin smiles waving his phone in the air.

A few moments pass, chatter between the four of you ensues. You loved your little group. Taehyung and Jimin welcomed Jungkook with open arms, the four of you going out on double dates, grabbing coffee, watching movies, and studying all became weekly occurrences. You were always so scared to dive into another relationship given your age and circumstance, but you swore that someway and somehow—you and Jungkook were meant to be together.

Twenty minutes later, the four of you step out of your Uber and make your way towards the new bar that opened near your campus. It was opening weekend and a Halloween party was obviously necessary. You held onto Jungkook’s hand tightly as you made your way inside the crowded area. You immediately aimed your way to the bar, ordering a vodka-soda, Jungkook ordering some soju.

“Don’t blackout on me now,” Jungkook raises an eyebrow at you, watching the way you take a huge sip of your drink.

“I said I’m a big girl,” you stand your ground, “I bet I can put away twice as many drinks as you.”

“Don’t listen to her Jungkook,” Taehyung says grabbing his own mixed drink, “She likes to spit nonsense when she’s drunk.”

“Oh trust me, I know,” he smirks at you and roll your eyes at him. Jungkook leans down and you peck his lips lightly—the same butterflies swirling in your stomach all these months later. Jimin watches the interaction closely. He knows exactly how you and Jungkook feels, but he still can’t shake the uneasiness deep in his gut.

“Come on, let’s dance,” you smile up at your boyfriend tugging on his arm. The music was loud and good, you were not just going to stand around. Jungkook nods quickly as you finish your drink, leaving Taehyung and Jimin behind at the bar.

Your heels made you more even with Jungkook’s height tonight as you threw your arms around his shoulders to pull him closer to you. His hands grip you waist tightly, wanting every guy here to know that you were his. For some reason, for whatever fucking reason—Jungkook felt inclined to protect you. As you sing whatever song was playing loudly, Jungkook found himself smiling and laughing at you. His chest twisted and his heart thumped. He still pinched himself when he woke up in the mornings. How did he get so lucky in this fucked world of destiny? If you weren’t meant for him, then who was?

You turn around pushing your back to his front. He holds you close as you both sway to the music as if it’s only you and him against the world. He smiles into your neck, kissing your delicate skin once in awhile. He spins you out from him and spins you back in quickly, your mind going dizzy.

“Hey careful,” you whine as you turn to him once again, “I’m drunk you know.”

“I thought you were a big girl,” he teases you and you narrow your eyes at him.

“Maybe not when I’m drunk,” you yell-whisper into his ear. He laughs, pulling you into a kiss. To any wondering eye, it would look as if you two were soulmates among other destined couples. Maybe that was the point? To fake it and then it becomes real?

Your heart swells at the thought. Jungkook studies your face intently, knowing that uttering his next words could be real dangerous but when you flash your gorgeous smile at him—he knows he has to say it.

“Wanna know a secret?” He asks.

“Sure.”

“I love you,” the words spill from his mouth. Your movements stop and you swear your drunkeness subsides momentarily.

“W-what?” You stutter. Did you hear him correctly?

“I know we’re drunk and this isn’t the best time but yeah,” he nods, “I love you Y/N.”

You head spins and you heart drops into your stomach. A smile creeps up onto your face.

“Really?” you ask, your eyes similar to those of a puppy. Jungkook nods, biting his lip. Will you say it back? “Thank fucking god, I thought I was the only one,” you say dramatically.

He furrows his eyebrows, chuckling, “Really?”

“Jeon Jungkook I fucking love you too,” you say, “I was waiting on you to say it.”

Once again he laughs, “Babe you can’t wait on stuff, you gotta go after what you want.”

“Well I already have you, don’t I?” You point out, “Come on, let’s go home.”

“Why? We’ve have one drink babe,” he says as you’re tugging on his hand.

“I know,” you look at him with a devilish smirk, “But I wanna fuck you and I’m not doing that in this bar.”

Jungkook’s face falls, blood rushing to his cock. “Fair enough.”

November is cold, which means December is going to be even colder. The days get shorter and your nights get longer as you try to prepare for finals in the next few weeks. Currently you’re bundled in two layers of clothing in the back of the library with Namjoon, adding the finishing touches on your final project that’s also due soon. Jungkook had to attend a seminar for one of his classes this evening which is why he’s MIA.

“Lucky shit,” Namjoon remarks when you explain your boyfriend’s absence. It was still strange to refer to him as your boyfriend.

“Would you honestly want to be lectured about how building muscles in the key to life right now?” You raise an eyebrow at him pointedly. Jungkook could even admit as a sports medicine major some of the people and things he learns about is absolute horseshit.

Namjoon laughs, “Touche.”

You’re working on the presentation aspect of you project while Namjoon is typing away at the research paper. As much as you despised the soulmate hoopla, reading about this stuff was very interesting. You had read how soulmates are apparently linked and of course, there is truly only one person meant for you. You rolled your eyes at these statements. If that was true, then why have you still not been given a name? There were so many questions that were just unanswerable that you couldn’t get over. Sure, the soulmate thing worked for some you couldn’t lie about that. At the end of the day though, perhaps you were one of the lucky ones—not bound by a name and given free reign over who is in the same spot as you.

“How’s everything going with you two by the way?” Namjoon asks curiously. His eyes haven’t left his computer screen so you oppose looking back at him when you answer.

“Good,” you smile slightly, “It’s still weird to think that we’re together,” you laugh at your statement.

He smiles to himself, “Weird for you? How about weird for me? I introduced the two of you being Jungkook is shy twat.”

“I know, I know,” you reach across the table and squeeze Namjoon’s hand playfully, “Which is why I’ve thanked you how many times now?”

“Yeah yeah, you only. Jungkook hasn’t given me his thanks yet.”

“I wouldn’t expect him too.”

“Trust me, I’m not,” he smiles with another stifled laugh as you two try to keep quiet. “So nothing’s really happened between you two?”

He’s referring to your project which you hastily agreed on letting yours and Jungkook’s “experience” to be first hand research.

You shake your head, “No. By the fifth time we had sex I was expecting to “feel excruciating pain deep within my chest as the universe tries to pull me away” him,” you quote one of the claims made by a well-known and well respected researcher. It was almost comical—how could anyone believe this stuff?

“Okay, TMI,” he puts his hands up.

“Hey this was your idea,” you remind him.

“It’s just wild to me,” he says, “I mean we grow up thinking there’s someone out there only meant for us and you and Jungkook… just don’t have one?” He looks off in the distance and you’re not sure if you should be offended by his statement—though Namjoon is a realist and he’s very logical so everything he’s saying is true.

“We have each other,” you shrug, “That’s good enough for me. I love him for who he is,” you almost feel heat coming to your face but you push it down.

“That’s how I feel about Kaya,” he almost smiles.

You look at him curiously—Namjoon hardly ever speaks of his soulmate. They’ve been together for a long time but she goes to university a couple hours from here so they don’t get to see each other as often as they would like.

“Can I see?” You whisper. He furrows his eyebrows, confused. “Your mark, I mean.”

Namjoon looks down at his left hand before nodding, opening his palm for you. In faint white writing, almost skin color—is the name Kaya in beautiful cursive. It makes your heart strings feel heavy for a moment. You knew you didn’t need a name to find love but you had always been curious about what it would be like to dawn one.

“Did it hurt? When it showed up?”

He shakes his head, “Not really, just kind like a little sting.”

“Why do you think I don’t have one? And Jungkook too?”

Your question catches him off guard. Honestly if anyone could answer this question, it was Park Jimin but he obviously wasn’t here. Namjoon was smart though—maybe he had good theories.

“I honestly don’t know,” he says softly, “I feel all the research of this stuff only applies for people who have one.”

You snort, “Right.”

“I mean you can never say never though,” he shakes his head, “Just because society has said before eighteen, that could be bullshit for all we know. You saw how in some of these articles, some names showed up in people’s early and mid-twenties too.”

“Yeah… and then what?”

“What do you mean?” He asks.

“It’s just seems so unfair that I can see Jungkook in my life after college and that could be taken away so easily. Or I could be taken away from him… it’s just so fucked don’t you think?” You don’t even realize how shaky your tone is, but Namjoon picks it up.

“Are you worried about that?”

Your mouth goes dry, “I like to think he’s the one for me,” you say after a few seconds of silence.

He bites his lip, unsure of what to say next, “Well maybe he is,” he offers trying to lighten your mood.

You look down at your hands, inspecting your wrist and fingers carefully. Your stomach churns at your next thought.

“And what if he isn’t?” You glance back to find his eyes staring holes into you.

“Then it wasn’t meant to be. I’d like to think the universe isn’t wrong.”

You nod slowly taking in his words. Sure you and Jungkook had been official for awhile now and you hoped that this feeling with him would never end. You liked to think the universe isn’t wrong either and maybe that’s why you and Jungkook found each other—cause it was meant to be.

Yours and Namjoon’s conversation stuck with you the rest of the evening. Jungkook had picked you up from the library in his black Mercedes around 8 PM. Even though it was a Wednesday, you and Jungkook had been staying at each other’s places more often than not. With your only roommate being away in Europe for study abroad, it was nice having him stay with you.

Jungkook noticed something was bothering you as he drove back to your place as you didn’t say much to him. You gripped his hand tightly in yours but the way your eyes didn’t meet his— it worried him. He became even more worried when you didn’t want to eat dinner after he had picked up your favorite takeout. It was his treat to you since he was unable to come to the library tonight.

“I’m just not that hungry,” you said pushing around the Chinese food with your chopsticks. You were both sat on your couch, your feet up in his lap watching some romantic-comedy TV show—Jungkook’s choosing—not yours.

“You’re always hungry,” he says poking at your leg to try to get a smile from you. Nothing. He furrows his eyebrows at you though you don’t even notice it as you’re looking away from him.

“What’s up babe?” Jungkook’s question takes you out of your thoughts. Were you that obvious?

“Hm?” You glance at him, trying to play your emotions off.

“You’re just being so… quiet?” He says softly, setting down his plate on the coffee table. He shifts his body to your frame, a hand holding up his head on the back of the couch.

“I don’t know,” you mumble, “Just have a lot on my mind.”

“Y/N you can tell me anything you know,” he rubs the back of your calves. The motion alone relaxes you significantly and you still don’t know how someone has this affect over you.

You pause, unsure if you should voice your worries to him. Would they cause problems between you two if you said what you were actually thinking? Was Namjoon right? “It’s just Namjoon and I were talking tonight and—“

“What did he say to you?” Jungkook quickly interrupts with a harsh tone. As much as Jungkook loved Namjoon like a brother—he was too brash and sometimes that lead to hurt feelings.

“It’s nothing he said it just got me thinking,” you shake your head aimlessly, looking behind Jungkook’s head at the wall. He doesn’t say anything wanting you to continue. “Don’t you worry about the future?”

Jungkook purses his lips, thinking deeply about your question before answering honestly.

“Everyday,” he says, “But I like to live for now, in the present… why are you asking?”

“What are we supposed to do if we’re separated, huh?” The words tumble from your mouth, your tone not the sweetest. You tense up in Jungkook’s hands and he notices your demeanor quickly changing.

“Why are you saying that Y/N?” His voice is confused and heavy.

“Because I fucking love you Jungkook and I don’t want you taken away from me, that’s why,” you let out a deep breath, pushing yourself up and off the couch. Jungkook watches you as you stand up and walk towards the kitchen. You’re clearly distressed about something. Slowly, he rises to his feet sauntering over to your frame that’s staring down at the sink.

“Y/N,” his voice is low behind you. Your knuckles are nearly white from gripping the side of the counter so hard. You felt tears pricking in your eyes that you had to force away. Jungkook wraps his arms around your front and you lean back into his frame.

He rests his head on your shoulder, “Baby I get it, okay? I know it’s scary not knowing what the hell is wrong with people like us—“

“That’s the problem Jungkook,” you say, “There’s something wrong with us and it’s fucked up. How do we know that this, us, is okay?”

“Listen I know you don’t believe in destiny and all that stuff but,” he pauses nuzzling into your neck, “But I do and I feel like if this, us—isn’t meant to be, then what is?”

You lean your head on his before you reluctantly turn your body around, your hands sliding behind his torso.

“How are you so sure?” You mutter meeting his gaze. His eyes are worried for you but still deep down, they have a light and wonder you’ve never fully understood.

He gives you a tiny smile, brushing his nose against yours, “Because I love you, okay? Like I’ve never loved anyone more before, I promise you, we’ll be fine. You will be fine.”

The weight from your shoulders is lifted as Jungkook’s words reassure you. He had such a hopeless romantic complex about him, you were sure he knew everything right to say to make you feel better. He was right—the odds of you two being this late in the game and meeting can’t be coincidental. He was yours and you were his—that’s all that mattered.

“Are you good now?” He raises his eyebrows at you and you nod against his forehead, leaning forward to peck his lips.

“Much better,” you then say. Jungkook chases his mouth with yours again before pulling away after a brief kiss.

“Good because I had something important to ask you anyways,” he says giving you some space.

Your eyes bulge, a worried look instantly spreading on your features, “You’re not asking me to marry you, are you? After what we just—“

He shakes his head with a laugh, “No, not right now at least,” he continues to laugh and your heart lurches at the thought. “But I was gonna ask if you wanted to come to Busan with me, for Christmas?”

You are taken aback by his question, your mouth parting unsure of what to say.

“Like go home with you?” He nods at your question, “And meet your family?” He nods again.

“I know we haven’t been together that long but I’d figure I would offer,” he shrugs.

“Do your parents know about us?”

“I mentioned someone to them on the phone the other day.”

“Do they know the full situation?” you ponder. You two weren’t soulmates and meeting parents was a huge step.

“No,” he says, “But that doesn’t mean we can’t fake it,” a smirk spreads on his lips.

“Jungkook, I don’t know if that’s the best idea.”

“None of my ideas are the best ideas let’s be real,” he chuckles, “And I’m not saying you have to go, but if you want to the offer is there.”

You bite your lip as your eyes meet. The stove light was shining on his face so his small scar was prominent. It would be nice you suppose, meeting his brother who gave him that scar and his parents too. You had never met any of your significant other’s parents—Jungkook really must believe in you two then.

“I’ll think about it,” you smile up at him, squeezing your arms tightly around his frame. He nods before leaning down, kissing you once again gently. Your night ends with you finally eating your food and Jungkook in your bed making you feel better than anyone ever has. It was perfect.

WINTER

“And how, may I ask,” your professor’s voice is the first to ask a question when you are done speaking, “Did the three of you manage to maintain data regarding the intimacy of two people whose souls are not bound yet?”

Your eyes flicker over to Namjoon and Jungkook. You’re about to respond but Namjoon beats you to it.

“Professor Jung, we know it can seem like we made up part of our research but,” he pauses, “But we trust the individuals who relayed us this information in the past three months and out of respect for them… we ask for you not to probe too much.”

Your professor’s eyebrows raise at Namjoon’s comment. His eyes flicker between the three of you, unable to decipher Namjoon’s passive aggressiveness. You were thankful he decided to answer the question, because you’re sure that you would have been too nice about it. Why can’t this jackass just take the information you are presenting and shove it up his ass?

“I see,” he breathes in deeply, “It just seems very hard for me to wrap my head around the argument that you’ve presented, when there’s so much research saying the opposite. The effects of intimacy is sacred for soul bonded people. Horrible illnesses and other things can happen to these people that go against nature.”

“It does seem that way professor,” you chime in, “But perhaps it’s time for new, more in-depth research to be done on this subject. These independent relationships may not work for everyone but in this case—it has.”

He chews on the end of his pen, “I agree wholeheartedly and though I still have my doubts about your research, I cannot deny the three of you have presented me with a topic that no one ever has before. The psychology behind soul-binding, sex, and relationships is amazing and endless… and isn’t the point of life to ask questions?” He seems to have lost somewhat focus on the three of you. What an idiot.

“Exactly,” Jungkook nods sending you a quick wink. You chew on your bottom lip to avoid from grinning. “As they say, we learn something new everyday.”

“That you are correct Mr. Jeon,” he say points to your boyfriend. “Well, I think you three have presented a wonderful project and I look forward to reading your research paper for further depth. Expect a grade by the end of the week. Thank you, it was… mostly a pleasure having you in my class,” his eyes glance at you briefly and it takes all of you not to launch at him over his stupidly expensive desk.

“Thank you professor. Have a good winter break,” Namjoon smiles. The three of you leave the small conference room attached to his office. Thankfully, you did not have to present your project in front of the entire class.

You let out a groan of relief when the cold winter air welcomes you outside. “Thank god that’s over!” You smile up at the sky.

Jungkook throws an arm around your shoulder to pull you in close, “What grade do you think we’ll get hyung?” He smiles at Namjoon who is digging around for his phone.

“Hopefully an A. With the bullshit you were feeding him? I think he loved it, he was just being a hardass because of Y/N,” he motions to you.

You’re mouth falls open, “Hey! It’s not my fault he doesn’t like me! He’s a raging psychotic sexist,” you huff crossing your arms over you.

“Uh huh,” Namjoon hums, “First day straggler.”

You narrow your eyes at him before Jungkook nudges you, “C’mon I’m freezing, let’s go home,” he whines and you give him a small nod.

“I’ll see you after break?” You ask the dimpled man in front of you.

He smiles, “Yeah for sure. But I gotta go—I have a plane to catch later tonight.”

“Where are you going?” This is even news to Jungkook.

“Oh, Kaya and I are going to Europe for two weeks, should be fun,” he looks down at his phone, “Oh shit, yeah I gotta go, Merry Christmas!” He waves at you two before running off in the opposite direction to the bus stop.

“Europe? I wanna go to Europe,” you pout looking up at Jungkook. He gives you a peck on the lips, your pout irrespective.

“We’ll go one day. It’s fun,” he says as you two begin to walk towards the student parking lot.

“You’ve been?”

“A few countries there, yeah,” he nods intertwining your fingers. Jeez, the amount of things and places Jungkook has been in his 22 years made your life look boring as hell. “Like I said, we’ll go—I promise,” is the last thing he says before you two get into his car.

The car ride is mostly a comfortable silence on the way to your place. His hand rests on your thigh, holding you tighter whenever he takes a turn.

“Are you sure you don’t want to come with me?” Jungkook asks suddenly getting your attention.

“It’s not that I don’t want to Jungkook,” you say, “It’s just Taehyung said he was going to be here by himself all break and when he asked, I felt bad.”

He pouts giving you a glance, “I know but I’ll be lonelyyy,” he drags out.

“You have your whole family babe,” you laugh at his childish demeanor.

“Yeah but I’m not exactly into cuddling my brother when I go to sleep,” he mutters and you swat his arm. “And you’re telling me I have to go two weeks without having sex?!”

“Jungkook,” you roll your eyes with a laugh, “You’re starting to sound like Professor Jung with your concerns about sex.”

“Duh,” he says, “Why do you think I liked him so much?”

“I hate you,” you deadpan and you gives you a shit-eating grin.

“I love you too.”

The next couple days Jungkook stays at your place completely, not wanting to leave your side before he has to go to Busan for two weeks. He was very disappointed that you didn’t want to go to Busan with him, but he knew Taehyung was your best friend and you were bound to do anything for him.

“I can’t believe you’re trusting me with your car,” you say pulling into the train station parking garage. His Mercedes was a low-ground sports car, complete with a V8 engine and custom leather seats. You were still blown away that Jungkook had this car in college. You assumed that his parents must have money because you didn’t know how else to explain it.

Jungkook was nervous watching you drive his baby. When you would press on the gas or the breaks a little too hard he could felt his heart stop for a second.

“Yeah just please be careful,” he pleads as you park perfectly. You put his car in park and turn to him.

“Don’t you trust me?” You blink your lashes at him. He smirks adjusting the beanie on his head.

“I do,” he says, “Mostly.”

“Let’s make a deal Jeon,” you suggest as you help him unload his bags from the trunk. Jungkook was like a woman bringing two full suitcases and a duffle bag with him for a two week trip.

“Shoot babe,” he says.

“If nothing happens to your car in these two weeks—which it won’t—you can treat me for being a good girl,” you smirk up at him and he visibly gulps, rolling his tongue in his cheek. He thought your morning sex would have been enough but he wonder’s if he should take you into a bathroom at the train station and fuck your brains out again before he leaves.

“Deal,” he manages to choke out, going against his previous thought. Goddamn he was so in love with you he wasn’t sure he could make it without you for two weeks. In the five months you have known each other this was going to be longest time spent apart.

As you approach the ticket counter for Jungkook to check in, you start to feel a sadness settling in your heart and stomach. You felt like you were being dramatic about not seeing Jungkook for two weeks but he had become such an important role in your happiness—it was going to be weird not seeing him everyday. He truly was your other half.

“Alright I gotta head to my platform,” Jungkook says giving you a weak smile. “Thanks for driving me here.”

You try your best to muster up a smile, “No problem.”

He quickly pulls you in for a hug, encasing your frame around his tightly. You inhale his scent deeply so you won’t forget it in the next couple weeks.

“Don’t miss me too much,” he mumbles into your ear.

You pull your head out of his chest, “As long as you don’t miss me too much.”

God you two were disgusting.

He smiles leaning down a for kiss, you close the gap between you two. You only kiss for a moment not wanting to catch any unwanted attention.

“I love you,” you smile at him.

“I love you too,” he says, suddenly reaching into the deep pocket of his large sweatshirt. “Here,” he hands over a tiny box wrapped in Christmas paper and an envelope taped to the bottom of it.

“Jungkook,” you look at him and then the present, “We said we weren’t going to give each other presents.”

“I know but I couldn’t resist. I just thought of you when I saw it.”

“Thank you,” your heart flutters and you give him one last peck before he has to leave.

“Merry Christmas,” he says, “I’ll let you know when I arrive.”

“Merry Christmas Jungkook.”

A brief walk back to Jungkook’s car has your heart in shambles. As you watched him leave for his platform, you couldn’t help but think you should have went with him. Taehyung would have understood—but that also meant meeting his parents and you weren’t sure that was a good idea just yet.

You settled into the driver seat of his car, carefully tearing the wrapping from the small box. Your eyes widen when you open it, a baby teal box revealing a beautiful ring on the inside. A gold band shines in the light, a small circular diamond in the middle shines even brighter.

“Holy shit,” you breathe out, quickly ripping open the envelope that he also gave you. It contained a cheesy Christmas card, his handwriting scribbling—

Merry Christmas Y/N. You’ve changed my life in more ways than one. I’m just one call away and I’ll always be here for you.

Cheesy I know—but you know cheesy is my middle name.

I love you.

Jungkook

“Jesus Christ Y/N!” Taehyung exclaims when you show him your new accessory on your hand. “This must have been thousands of dollars,” he grabs your hand to inspect the jewelry. “Tiffany too? What kind of money is Jungkook’s parent’s shitting out for him to give you this?”

“Hey now, he does well with his photography,” you pinch in, noting that he began selling pieces after much consideration.

“I know I know but damn,” he moves your hand around to see the light catching in the diamond. “When did he give you this?”

“The other day when I dropped him off at the train station.”

“Wow… I think you’ve won in the boyfriend category Y/N,” his eyes still haven’t left your finger and you know it’s the alcohol in his system that is keeping him mesmerized.

“It’s not a competition dumbass,” you spew at him.

“What did you get him? An amazing blowjob topped with a new lens for his cameras?”

You laugh at Taehyung’s words, “I’m more mad at the fact the he even bought it, we said we weren’t going to give each other gifts.”

“Well shit Y/N he basically proposed to you—that’s not a gift, is it?” His glassy, wine drunk eyes look at you curiously.

You pull your hand away from him, laying back down against your couch.

“Tae,” you mutter, feeling slightly tipsy yourself, “Do you think Jungkook and I will last?”

Taehyung leans back beside you, exhaling a deep breathe heavily. He doesn’t say anything for a few moments. The silence isn’t uncomfortable but it makes you nervous.

“Yeah,” he says, his eyes looking straight ahead, his tone real and understanding. Taehyung couldn’t voice it—no matter how much he wanted to over the months of you relationship with Jungkook—but he knew what you were going through in more ways than one.

“Really?” You look at him, nuzzling your head into his outstretched arm. He looks down at you before nodding.

“If you two want it to work… it will,” his voice deep and serious.

“How do you know that though?” You mutter, your tone down and pessimistic.

He breathes in deeply, “I just do… I know you two love each other. Anyone can see it Y/N. Don’t doubt anything unless you’ve been given a reason to doubt.”

Taehyung was always more philosophical when he was drinking and this proves that even more.

“Trust me,” his deep voice adds when you don’t say anything immediately .

“What would I do without you?” You finally muster looking up at him.

He smirks, “Lose your mind, that’s what.”

“Give me more credit than that asshole,” you push against his torso.

He laughs before responds with, “Hell no.”

“Well, should we open up our presents?” You give him a small smile glancing at the gifts that were lazily strewn on the floor. Your miniature Christmas tree was slightly pathetic—but it was better than nothing you suppose.

“Sure, but don’t expect another item from Tiffany alright?” He muses as he stands up to grab his gifts for you.

“Fuck off,” you laugh reaching your hands out as he places a bag and a box wrapped in front of you. You were sure Jimin wrapped these given how perfect they were.

“You first,” he gives you a warm smile. You dig into the bag first as it is less to unwrap. Your mouth drops open when you pull out a box of condoms, Taehyung stifling a laugh behind his smile.

“Taehyung are you kidding me?” You’re trying hard not to laugh either. He fucking would.

“Ultra thin… thought they would come in handy since, you know, you two fuck like bunnies,” he sends over a wink and you’re quick to flip him off. You open his next present which happens to be a coat you’ve been eyeing for the past few weeks, but hesitant to buy due to the $300 price tag.

“Tae, you didn’t have to get me this,” you marvel at the thick material, the baby blue color just the one you wanted. “This is too expensive—“

“Babe it’s fine,” he shakes his head, “I know you need some help with our wardrobe so I’m only offering my services,” he says matter of factly.

You move the box away from you and throw your arms around his neck. He hugs you tightly and in this moment you realize how happy your are. You perhaps have the best boyfriend and best friend of anyone you know. You didn’t think anything would change that.

“Here,” you pass Taehyung over your present and he quickly rips the paper off. He looks like a little kid on Christmas morning and you decide to pour more wine as he fidgets with the box.

“Shit Y/N!” He smiles widely, “Holy shit you didn’t have to get me this,” he takes his gift out of the box. He smiles widely at the leather bag you got him. Not a cheap price tag either—but it was Taehyung’s favorite bag and his old one was not cutting it anymore.

“It’s fine,” you shake your head, gulping down your white wine quickly. You two were quite drunk at this point.

“Jeez,” he shakes his head pulling you into another bone crushing hug, “Fuck Jimin and Jungkook. Let’s just get married, you and me kid.”

You laugh at his words, “Trust me, if you were straight I would take you up on that.”

The rest of your evening is spent with watching “How the Grinch Stole Christmas,” more wine, and endless laughter with your best friend.

It’s about 5 AM when you wake up in your bed with a busting headache and a stomach ache that has you doubled over on your toilet. Fuck, did you really drink that much? Your question is answered when everything in your stomach is coming up through your esophagus. You don’t know how long you sit on your knees, hands on the toilet throwing up your guts.

“Y/N?” Taehyung appears at your bathroom door rubbing his eyes, “Whoa, are you okay?” He quickly comes down behind you, holding your hair back and away from your face.

Finally after what seems like forever, you stop throwing up, resting your head on the porcelain.

“Yeah,” you groan, your throat raw and sore, “I guess I just drank too much.”

“Shit, do you need anything?” He asks, voice laced with concern.

“Just some water please,” you tell him and he leaves to quickly get you a glass. “Fuck,” you mutter to yourself. You’re not sure the last time you were this hungover was. You knew you needed water and sleep—maybe that would alleviate the pain in your head and stomach.

You get back into bed a few moments later with Taehyung laying down beside you. He gives you your space and before you know it, both of you fall back to sleep.

You wake up again around 10 AM, your headache still busting but your stomach more settled now. You’re sipping tea watching another Christmas movie with Taehyung when your phone rings. A smile stretches on your face when you see Jungkook’s name pop up.

“Hey,” you answer the phone, sitting up from your position on the couch.

“Hey babe,” his voice brings comfort to your ears, “Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas,” you say, “Did you have a good morning?”

Jungkook hesitates over the line before speaks again, “Uh, yeah… what about you?”

You furrow your eyebrows at his tone. He sounds… distant and unconfident with his words.

“I mean I’ve been better,” you laugh, watching Taehyung glance at you quickly.

“What’s wrong?” He asks.

“Well I’m just really hungover, Taehyung really did a number on me with the wine last night,” you laugh again trying to ease whatever tension Jungkook is holding through the phone.

He chuckles nervously for a moment over the phone, “Well drink some water and rest okay?”

“I know, I’m gonna take it easy for the rest of the day,” you look at your nails that desperately need to be manicured.

“Yeah good,” is all he says and you purse your lips. Normally Jungkook is so talkative over the phone—what’s up with him?

“Babe are you okay?” You ask him with genuine concern. You would hate for him to be going through something and him not tell you. Taehyung gives you a weird look and you shrug your shoulders.

“Yeah,” he clears his throat, “I’m just tired from all the Christmas hoopla I’ve had to do the past few days,” he says seeming to explain his demeanor, “But I’m gonna call you later okay? I’ve got a Christmas brunch to get ready for but I just wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas.”

You smile at his words, “Alright, have fun. I’ll talk to you later. Hurry home. I love you.”

“I’ll try I promise,” you can sense a small smile in his voice, “I love you too.” So much.

You stay sick for the next three days. Your body aches, your head hurts, and you’re still throwing up occasionally therefore you’ve barely had anything to eat the past three days. You and Taehyung are afraid you’ve picked up a small flu from someone. Despite this, Taehyung stays with you, not wanting to leave you alone sick like this.

Jimin gets back from home a couple days after you’ve fallen ill. Jimin being a medical guy himself, is unsure of what or who could have gotten you sick.

“As long as you don’t get and maintain a fever, I think you should be fine,” he says watching your frame on your couch. You had not felt this sick in so long and of course it had to be right before Jungkook got back home too.

“Should Jungkook come around her? He gets back when, tomorrow?” Taehyung asks you.

You nod, “Yeah, tomorrow evening,” you manage to say through your sore throat that feels like it’s actually on fire.

“I don’t think you’re contagious otherwise he would be sick too,” he motions to Taehyung, “He should be fine,” his voice is low and steady. His eyes don’t leave your frame though you’re too tired to notice Jimin’s intense stare.

You push yourself off of the couch, wanting to get some sleep in your bed. “I’m gonna take a nap, you guys don’t have to stay here if you don’t want to.”

Taehyung and Jimin exchange a glance before nodding, “We can get some food and bring some back for you later?”

“That would be great Tae,” you smile at him, “Thanks guys.”

Jimin and Taehyung leave your apartment, locking the door behind them with Taehyung’s spare key.

“Do you think she’s really okay? I’ve never seen her like this,” Taehyung mumbles to Jimin as he pulls up directions to the nearest ramen restaurant near them.

Jimin’s throat goes dry and he hesitates, biting his lip, “Honestly, I think we’ll just have to see.”

Jimin’s words are uneasy in Taehyung’s mind—both of them equally worried for you.

. You are jumping out of the shower when you get a text from Jungkook.

[Jungkook ♥ 6:58 PM] I’m about an hour away. Can’t wait to see you.

You smile at his text, heart fluttering at the thought of seeing him again. Today you woke up feeling a lot better—still not 100%—but you could actually stomach food today. Despite your illness, you didn’t really care at this point. You could wait to see Jungkook—you missed him so much more than you thought you would have.

[You 7:00 PM] Perfect. I’ll see you soon ♥

[Jungkook ♥ 7:02 PM] ♥

The train station is more crowded than it was went you sent Jungkook off. The masses of being returning from their holiday was immense and you were afriad you weren’t going to be able to find Jungkook through the masses.

Little to your knowledge, Jungkook had spotted you after he exited his platform—a beautiful baby blue coat hanging off of your frame—signaling where you stood. After not seeing your face for two weeks, he smiled to himself. You were so fucking beautiful to him and he loved you so much—it only made his heart hurt even more.

He hesitates walking towards your back that’s facing him. He takes in a deep breath before he wraps his arms around your front. You jump in his arms and turn around with the smile that makes his day. Today—it only breaks him even further.

“Jungkook,” you turn around and hug him tightly. Finally—he was home. He doesn’t say anything as he returns your hug, kissing you on the top of the head. He glances down at his arms, pulling his jacket sleeve down, making sure his watch wasn’t going anywhere.

After all, he was desperate to hide the name that was inked on his wrist that wasn’t yours.

JUNGKOOK

Christmas Eve—Busan

Jungkook’s tie is too tight around his neck. He swore to his mother that it was fine but her being as stubborn as she was, made sure to secure it so that not even she could move it. He pulls at his collar and his older brother, Junghyun laughs at him.

“You look like a little kid, pulling and tugging at that you know,” Junghyun eyes Jungkook and he rolls his eyes.

“It’s suffocating hyung—I’m not drunk enough for this bullshit,” Jungkook responds with a laugh.

It was their annual Christmas Eve party held by their father’s company and it was just as stuffy and rich as Jungkook remembers. Jungkook and his brother didn’t speak much about their wealth. They had both grown up with more money, toys, clothes, shoes, and vacations that they ever needed. They never once complained as they both know how incredibly lucky they were to have already lived 5 lives before turning 30. They did however, understand how tiring this lifestyle was.

Perhaps it is why neither Jungkook or Junghyun pursued business as a major—neither one wanted to have this much to handle on their plate. Thankfully, despite most of the people that associated with the Jeon family—their mother and father were humble and respected their sons’ decisions to make their own path. If it were up to their mother though, should would have her sons closer to Busan than so far away.

“Well, the night is still young,” his brother speaks again, handing Jungkook a glass of champagne.

“There you two are,” Yeri—Junghyun’s soulmate and partner appears from what seems to be out of thin air. “Hi my love,” she smiles up at Junghyun as he pulls her closer to his hip. “Jungkook, how are you?”

“Pretty good, my tie is too tight,” he pouts.

Yeri observes Jungkook, “I think it looks good?” She looks back up at his brother and he nods in agreement.

“I know, he’s just a baby,” he remarks and Jungkook rolls his eyes.

“Anyways, your mother is looking for you two—we’re about to eat dinner,” she informs and both of the brother’s nod.

Jungkook follows closely behind them, weaving in and out of people to get to their designated table. Jungkook only recognizes a handful of people he passes even though they know exactly who he is. They find their table, their parents already seated and ready for dinner.

Jungkook smiles when he sees his mother, bending down to hug her.

“Hello Jungkook, Junghyun,” she greets her sons, “Yeri, please sit!”

He takes a seat right of his mom, Junghyun and Yeri to his left. His father is busy speaking with a business partner at the table to pay much attention to them. Jungkook grew up used to that though—his father always overworking himself, barely getting home before they had to go to bed. Despite this, he was still a great father in Jungkook’s eyes, providing and making them laugh every chance he got.

“What’s for dinner, Mrs. Jeon?” Yeri asks. Jungkook’s mother loved Yeri the moment she set her eyes on her all those years ago and nothing has changed.

“Oh, we’re having a little bit of everything—bulgogi, samgyeopsal, jajangmyeon, kimchi. I hope it’s good, we had to get a new caterer this year,” a sudden worry falls over he face but she quickly brushes it away.

“Perfect, I’m starved,” Jungkook mumbles, once again, mindlessly tugging at his collar. Jungkook’s mom swats his hand away.

“Quit it, you’re fine,” she scolds him and he settles in his seat, picking up his newly poured glass of red wine. It was true—he was starved and if he didn’t get food in his system quickly, he would probably become tipsy from a singular glass of champagne and wine.

The food arrives at each table in an orderly fashion as everyone finally takes their seats. A few words of thanks are spoken before everyone digs in, placing various meats on the grills in front of them. Commotion and chatter quickly fill the large hall. Jungkook is busy stuffing his mouth with noodles when suddenly his name is spoken across the table.

“Jungkook,” his father addresses him. He swallows his food quickly before raising an eyebrow in response. “You remember Mr. Kim, Seokjin’s father?”

The mention of Seokjin brings a wash of memories over Jungkook’s brain. He was an older kid that him and Junghyun used to play around with growing up.

“Yes, of course,” Jungkook slightly smiles to the elder.

“I can’t believe you’re almost done with university,” Mr. Kim compliments Jungkook, “What are you majoring in again?”

“Sports medicine,” Jungkook says feeling slightly intimidated by his stare. Suddenly Mr. Kim’s eyes glance down to Jungkook’s hand and he suddenly feels self conscious about his the ink colored on his fingers. He quickly retracts his hand under the table before he speaks again.

“Well that’s really good to hear,” he smiles warmly again, “Are you planning on furthering your education past undergrad?”

“Yes sir,” he nods, “I plan to pursue a sports physician or therapist within the next few years.”

He looks over at Jungkook’s father, “I don’t think your sons could be any more opposite than you and I,” he laughs and Jungkook’s father nods with a small smile.

“As long as they’re happy, that’s all that matters,” his father says. Jungkook glances at Junghyun, hoping he was paying some attention to the conversation so Jungkook could continue eating. He wasn’t.

“Yes I see,” Mr. Kim nods, “They will do good for themselves and their partners, I’m sure of it.”

The mention of the word partner gets Jungkook’s mother’s attention.

“Oh yes, Junghyun and Yeri have recently leased a house in Seoul,” she smiles proudly at her eldest. It was true—Junghyun was a practicing lawyer and Yeri was a court reporter so they were doing pretty well off even though they haven’t reached 30 yet.

“If only they could hurry up and get married,” she then adds with a laugh. Junghyun looks over and he grimaces, though no ill intent by the stare.

“Mom, we’ve told you. We’re settling our house and finances for another year or so, then we are,” he responds swiftly.

“Well, then it seems like Jungkook is due next,” Mr. Kim adds into the mix. Suddenly, Jungkook tenses up and his face falls. Oh how he wish you were here right now so he wasn’t alone in this.

“Well Jungkook does have a partner, right?” His mom looks over at him. Jungkook had mentioned you to his mom and dad but that was it—so this is news for Junghyun and Yeri who were carefully listening to his words. Jungkook was 22 after all—the clock was ticking.

“Yes mom,” he nods, “I invited her to Busan with me for the holidays but she decided to stay back home,” he explains.

“Ah, that’s too bad, we would have loved to meet her,” Mr. Kim says, “Next time though?’

Jungkook nods, a small smile present, “Next time.”

The conversation thankfully dies after that. As much as Jungkook wanted to talk about you—he was so hesitant for well, obvious reasons. His mom had the most questions about you and he answered all of them to her liking. She seemed to think their souls were bonded and wasn’t that the point he was trying to make? He wanted his mom to love you like he did and he was confident she would by the way her eyes lit up when he spoke about you.

“She seems lovely Jungkook,” she says, “And you just met her this year? After all this time?”

After all this time—yeah right. “Yeah, we had a class together.”

“Well I for one cannot wait to meet her,” she smiles taking a sip of her wine, “You should invite her again when you two graduate, you know we have to have a party to celebrate.”

Jungkook’s mouth goes dry but he nods quickly, just wanting to focus on the dessert that was being place in front of him.

“She would love that,” is all he says before he digs into his cheesecake. After a few glasses of wine, Jungkook had felt himself become a little tipsy and he knew he needed to slow down if he wanted to enjoy Christmas morning.

After he finishes his sweet treat, he excuses himself to get some water. As much as he hates these kinds of things, he wishes he had his camera to capture some memories—even though it was his first Christmas with you despite being separated by hundreds of kilometers.

He reaches the beverage table, quickly asking for a glass of water when suddenly he feels a tap on his shoulder.

“Excuse me?” A girls voice asks, “Would you mind getting me a glass of Chardonnay?”

He glances at the girl before nodding, asking for a glass to hand to her. The server hands Jungkook a wine glass and he turns around to see the girl for the first time. He’s slightly taken aback from her beauty. She’s got warm brown hair that flows down her chest, welcoming eyes, and a smile that he swears sparkled in the light.

“Thank you,” her eyes met his and he feels his chest tightening the longer he looks at her. As much as he wants to look away—he physically is unable. She seems to feel the same because he doesn’t know how much time has passed of them staring at each other before someone calls out to her.

She glances to her right, raising her glass as another thanks before walking away from Jungkook. His eyes follow her as her back turns to him. She’s wearing a simple purple dress with sleeves and heels that make her legs look long and lean.

He shakes his head out of his trance-like state, what the fuck? He takes another gulp of his water—it has to be alcohol getting to him. He’s about to head back to his parent’s table when he suddenly feels an itching on the inside of his left wrist. He scratches his skin harshly and he winces when it’s more painful than a normal scratch.

He glances down at his sleeve, pulling the material back to see what was so painful. He does a double take when he moves his watch, noticing harsh red lines forming on skin. The fuck, he thinks to himself. Jungkook makes the decision to excuse himself to the men’s room to cool the burning off with some water.

Thankfully he’s the only person occupying the room and he quickly turns on the water, running his skin underneath it. The burning subsides after a few moments and as he’s reaching for a towel to dry himself, he drops it to the floor before he can even use it.

While the red marks have gone away, a thin black line has replaced them.

Rose.

He blinks heavily, shaking his head. Is he really that drunk? He takes his nail to scratch at the black and when it doesn’t move, his mouth parts and the tie around his neck feels even more constricting.

“No,” he whispers to himself.

Rose.

It’s still there.

“No, no, no,” he mumbles, “Fuck,” his breathing picks up heavily and he looks at himself in the mirror. His face is pale and his eyes are blown out. Fuck.

Rose.

He moves his watch back over the marking and runs a hand through his hair, pulling on the ends harder than he should. He almost feels tears threatening to fall when he realizes what’s happening. This has to be a sick joke? The universe cannot be doing this—not right now—not after all this fucking time?

As much as his mind is racing, drunk and confusion do not make a good combination, he sees one thing for sure in the back of his brain. You. As this thought, his stomach churns deeply and before he realizes it—he’s spitting up some of his food and alcohol into the toilet.

“Fuck,” he says again wiping the perspiration away from his clammy hands onto his pants. He takes in a deep breath, freshening himself up before he leaves the bathroom with the mission to find one person and one person only.

Once he comes back into the main room, his eyes glance around quickly for a head of silky brown hair and a purple dress. His head looks around rapidly and anyone who saw him probably thought that he looked crazy. He spots Junghyun and Yeri getting another drink at the bar and he swiftly walks over towards them.

“Hyung,” Jungkook speaks quickly, shaking his brother’s shoulder.

“Huh? Jungkook, you okay?” His brother notices how ill Jungkook looks. Face pale, hair messily pushed around, uneasiness in his large eyes.

“Have you seen a girl,” he pauses trying to slow down, “Purple dress, kind of ashy brown hair to here,” he demonstrates the length with his hands. Junghyun looks at Jungkook like he’s crazy. Hell, maybe Jungkook is going crazy.

Junghyun shakes his head, “No I haven’t. What’s up?”

“I may have seen a purple dress going that way,” Yeri points her finger towards the other side of the large room. “Jungkook are you sure you’re okay?”

He doesn’t even give them one more glance before he thanks Yeri quickly, turning on his heels to head that direction. He nearly trips on his feet trying to get across the masses of people congregating. The ballroom has a couple hallways that lead off into other rooms and he decides his luck, checking in and out of the rooms. He’s coming up empty until he stops dead in his tracks, a back clad in purple facing him, talking to another man with blonde hair.

Suddenly, the blonde looks at Jungkook from over her shoulder and she follows. Her eyes meet Jungkook’s and he fills his breath hitching, his stomaching rolling once again.

“Hello?” The blonde asks curiously.

“Hi,” Jungkook steps forward. His hands are buried deep in his dress pants so they can’t see the way they shake with every breath.

“Yoongi, will you get me another drink please?” The girl speaks looking back at the man. He nods, settling not to say anything else as he brushes past Jungkook.

The girl stands awkwardly, her finger rimming an empty wine glass slowly. Jungkook can barely look at her but something is compelling him to. He can’t take his eyes off of her—she’s beautiful. He slowly walks towards her with some hesitation. She finally meets his eyes again and she visibly breathes in deep through her nose, her chest rising.

“Hi,” Jungkook says again.

“Hi,” she says with a low tone. She bites her lip nervously and she suddenly looks around the room—anywhere but him. “This place is really beautiful isn’t it?”

Jungkook follows her lead, eyes glancing around the room too, “Yeah, it is.”

“Your parents know how to put on a party,” she muses with a small laugh. Goddamn, he thinks, she is so beautiful. So, she knows exactly who he is.

“This is nothing compared to some other years,” he gently smiles when her lips turn up, her cheeks getting bigger with her own smile.

A silence falls between the two of them. She sways in her heels trying to relieve the pain in the balls of her feet.

“It’s you isn’t it,” Jungkook speaks first. She looks up at him, still saying silent. “You’re Rose?”

She dips her head, some of her hair falling in her face. She nods slowly, “I can’t believe you’re here,” she whispers and she almost sounds sad, perhaps broken? “After all this time,” she adds.

She looks at Jungkook like he’s her whole universe. Oh how he wishes he could say the same thing about her—it’s what this beautiful girl deserves. She deserves someone whose heart beats for them and them only. That wasn’t Jungkook—he had you and god how much he wanted to spend his life with you only.

“When did you find out?” He asks keeping his voice low and steady so his nervousness won’t show through.

“When I was fourteen,” she says. His heart sinks even further for this girl. His name had been engraved upon her skin for 8 years.

He doesn’t say anything else, opting to look down at his feet. The tension is there—the tension the universe gives soul bonded people. He feels his tie suffocating him again and he reaches up to loosen it again, to no relief though.

Suddenly, Rose steps forward, grabbing Jungkook’s hand to move it away from his collar.

“Let me help,” she says and he swears his heart stops beating when her delicate fingers touch his. Rose manages to undo his impossibly tight neck tie from his mother, retying it just as fast, but a lot more comfortable for him and his neck. Suddenly, Jungkook is glad you were unable to come to Busan with him.

“Thanks,” he laughs, “It’s been suffocating me all night.”

“I could tell,” she returns a chuckle, her palms resting on his chest. She’s just as nervous as he is—he can see the way she breathes unevenly being this close to her.

“I’m Jungkook,” he says.

“Rose.”

“Did you have a good Christmas?” You ask Jungkook as you step into his apartment. If possible, Jungkook came back with thrice as much stuff as he left with and you wanted to help him unpack.

“Pretty good,” he says simply, “I think my parents were disappointed you weren’t there,” he chuckles lightly. Jungkook’s roommates were still back home, not coming back until the new year, so you were going to stay with him to keep him company.

“Well, one day I’ll meet them,” your eyes search for his and he seems somewhat off. He hasn’t said much since you’ve picked him up from the train station. His eyes have looked a little lost, unsure of where to look.

“Yeah,” he shrugs off his coat and begins to unzip one of his 3 suitcases. You unzip a second, noticing how different his clothes smell.

“I see your mom did your laundry?” You quirk an eyebrow at him. He glances at you briefly, a small smile playing on his lips.

“Of course, what kind of son would I be if I didn’t bring all my laundry for my mom to do?”

Small conversation is said between the two of you as you unpack, fold, and hang up his clothes. You can’t help but notice the luxury men’s wear tags in the pants and shirts you hang up.

“What do your parents do Jungkook?” Your thumb brushes over the thick material of a new coat he received as a gift.

He’s hesitant to speak but he decides to tell you anyways, “My dad is president of a large company back in Busan. You know my mom is an artist,” he says and you recall the days he’s spoke highly of his creative mother.

Ah, you think, now you understand where the wealth comes from.

“I don’t like telling people because I don’t want people to think I’m some spoiled snob,” he laughs at the thought.

“Babe, you’re the farthest thing from that. You know work hard for things you want, what does it matter what anyone else thinks,” you hang the last piece of clothing from his suitcase up and he watches you intently.

He leans against his desk, arms crossed as he watches you carefully.

“Wanna see something I got,” he says clearing his throat as you look him in the eyes. His eyes quickly look away from yours, unable to face you fully just yet. You nod when you notice his eyes light up as he rummages through his duffle bag to pull out a new camera.

“Holy shit,” you admire the piece of technology as he holds it carefully in his hands. “Who got you this?”

“My brother if you could believe it,” he sounds like he doesn’t even believe his brother was capable of gifting him such a nice present.

“Damn,” you mutter, “Have you used it yet?”

He nods, “I played around with it at the beach before I left,” he says looking at your subtle smile. “Here, lemme take a picture of you,” he smiles a little wider.

“What? Jungkook I look disgusting,” you step away from him. Your hair is thrown up on your head, no makeup, and an oversized ratted turtleneck covers your frame.

“Baby come on you’re beautiful,” he pouts while adjusting the lens and other settings. “Please I wanna remember this.”

You furrow your eyebrows at him, “Remember what? The remnants of my illness that’s made me look crusty for days now?”

He laughs at you, “Sure, whatever you wanna call it,” he holds up his camera to see the lighting on you. “Sit down and scoot back,” he commands to you. You do as he says, sitting on his bed and scooting so your back is hilt against the wall.

“Here?”

He nods, “Mhm,” he focuses on adjusting the last of what he needs to before he says, “Smile babe, you’re on camera.”

You give him a glare before your features soften, giving him a small smile as you look directly into the lens. Your eyes meet Jungkook’s through the lens and he feels his chest tighten. He hated this—he was so in love with you he couldn’t stand the thought of losing you. You were his present and future—he didn’t want anyone else. How could the universe break him like this?

He snaps a couple photos before looking at them in the small frame. A small smile lets loose on his lips as his heart palpitates for you. He feels your eyes watching him closely and you’re unsure why—despite his smile—he seems so sad and so unsure.

Whatever is bothering him, you could only hope that he would open up to you soon and not suppress his feelings.

Jungkook’s only hope right now is cherishing these moments with you because as he has come to learn in the past few days—nothing good ever lasts.

Your phone was buzzing and buzzing annoying you to your core as you tried your best to shove your dangly earrings in your ears. You look down at the caller ID and you roll your eyes with a groan.

“Fuck Taehyung we’re coming!” You half yell at your phone that was still buzzing on your desk. Hearing ruckus in your room, Jungkook peeps in.

“You good babe?” He asks taking notice of how your room is practically flipped upside down. Clothes and jewelry are sprung around and the dress you have decided to wear isn’t even zipped yet, your lower back fully exposed to him.

“Yes,” you say finally slipping the plastic backs on your earrings. You look over your shoulder at Jungkook, heat rushing to your face when you realize how good he looks tonight. “Will you zip me up?”

He nods taking a step towards you, his fingertips cold against your skin. He slowly zips the beaded material up your back slowly not wanting to catch any strings. When he’s done, he wraps his arms around your front pulling you close to him.

“You look beautiful,” he smiles into your neck and you keen into his arms, your feet already blistering in your heels.

“You look sexy,” you muse with a giggle. He turns your body around to flush against his front and he quickly leans down to capture your lips. He’s slow and gentle, wanting you to know how much he cherishes you. He’s careful not to put a hand in your hair knowing how frustrated you were trying to fix it right, so he cradles your neck in one of his hands as you lean into him deeper.

You jump slightly in his arms when your phone starts buzzing again. Jungkook steps away from you and you groan loudly again.

“Remind me to kill him when we get in the car,” you punctuate as you grab your bag and the baby blue coat Taehyung gave you.

“Will do,” Jungkook gives you a wink before grasping your hand into his tightly.

New Years Eve was always a fun time in your friend group, especially at your age. Ever since you started university, you and Taehyung had made it tradition to go to one of the fancier bars in your area for the special occasion. Only having to pay an upfront free—it meant an open bar, free music, and a damn good time.

“Goddamn Y/N,” Taehyung says as you’re waiting in line to get in the bar.

“What? Is there something on my face? My teeth?” You panic looking at your best friend.

“No,” he pauses looking at your date up and down, “You really lucked out didn’t you.”

Jungkook suddenly laughs as his comment and you swat Taehyung’s head.

“Hey back off buddy,” you say wrapping your arms around Jungkook’s torso, “He’s mine asshole.”

“And you’re mine,” Jimin eyes Taehyung playfully. Taehyung had already drank half a bottle of champagne in the car ride from your apartment so he was definitely feeling frisky. It was absolutely freezing outside tonight and Jungkook made sure to keep his arms around you as you waited and waited outside.

“What’s going to be your drink of choice tonight Kook?” You look up at your boyfriend who looks so unbelievable handsome you could cry.

“Hmm, I’m thinking whatever will get me very drunk. Perhaps whiskey?”

Your face contorts at the mention of the dark liquor. Too many bad memories with that one.

“Lemme guess,” Jimin says, “You’re going to down about five green tea shots and then switch over to vodka soda with a splash of cranberry juice.”

Your eyes widen, slightly perturbed, “Am I that basic of a bitch?”

Jimin nods once, “Babe I’m a bartender, we can see girls like you coming from a mile away.”

“Ugh, fine you got me. But maybe instead of vodka soda I’ll just do a flat.” Truth is, you hadn’t drank since your sick spell over Christmas and you were more than ready to get drunk.

A few more minutes and you’re in the crowded bar. You stay close to Jungkook, his hand secured around yours as you make your way to the bar. As expected, you order green tea shots and Jungkook lives up to his previous statement—ordering a whiskey sour to start his night.

You’ve never seen this many people here before. It’s loud, hot, and crowded but it’s everything you could want for New Years Eve. Besides, what’s the fun in going out if it’s not going to be a little chaotic?

After a few drinks, Jungkook finds himself relaxing as he dances close to you. He’s happy right here and right now, but he can’t fully let go—his mind occupied of another woman. He hates himself for doing this, but what is he supposed to do? He’s careful around his arms, making sure his watch stays put and he sleeve doesn’t venture too far up just in case.

Your smile is wide and you feel like you’re on cloud nine. Sure, it was scary now that you were starting your last semester of college in a week but since you had Jungkook—you felt more secure in whatever life decides to throw at you than ever.

“I love you,” you say to Jungkook. It’s simple but you could tell him every minute of everyday and not get tired of it.

“I love you more,” he says. He’s honest and he only hopes you can’t see the deep sadness in his eyes. He kisses the tip of your nose and you scrunch it up at the feeling. “Do you want another drink?” He asks.

You nod, “Yes please.”

“Vodka cran?”

You nod once again, “I’ll be with Taehyung over there.”

Jungkook leaves you behind, walking back towards the bar. If he really was going to try to forget his worries—he was going to need something stronger.

“Two shots of whiskey please,” he says. He’ll get your drink when he’s finished so the ice won’t water it down.

“I didn’t take you for a whiskey guy,” a voice comes from his left and when he looks, he feels his whole world stopping.

“R-Rose?” He blinks, making sure he’s seeing correctly.

“I thought it was you over here,” she smiles asking the bartender for a shot of tequila. “How are you?”

He’s speechless. How? Right now?

“Doing well, how are you?” He asks trying to seem sly. God he could only hope that no one he knew, especially you, saw him right now.

“Same, I’m mentally preparing for my hangover tomorrow,” she laughs before downing her shot quickly.

He smiles, “I feel that,” he downs his first shot. It’s hot and it’s burning his throat. “Listen I’ve been meaning to text you but—“

“Don’t worry about it,” she waves her hand, “I mean what are the odds of us being here together? That’s worth more than a text right?”

He swallows, “Y-you’re right. I didn’t know you lived here.”

She nods, her gaze heavy and somewhat obscene, “I go to the all girls university in the area.”

“Ah, I see,” Jungkook says glancing around. Thankfully the copious amount of people have shielded him from anyone’s view.

“Are you here anyone tonight?” Fuck.

“Just some friends,” he says smoothly. “You?”

“Same. My roommates made me come, but now I’m glad I did,” she smiles brightly and Jungkook can himself falling deep into the hole again. Fuck the fucking universe.

“Me too,” he says before he can catch himself. Her eyes glance down to his lips before she looks back up at him.

“Well, I need to get back to my friends before we get fully separated,” she smiles again, “Come say hi if you see me again,” she winks.

He nods, his eyes wide and mouth dry. “Will do.”

He downs the second shot as she walks away, his eyes unable to rip from her frame. Jungkook was in deep shit—no doubting that. There was only so much longer he could keep up this facade. He was heartbroken to the core and as much as he wanted to be selfish and forget about the name attached to his wrist—that wasn’t plausible. It was a reality he had to face sooner or later.

“Fuck,” he says, ordering your drink before he forgets and another shot of whiskey for the hell of it. There was no getting Rose off his mind now but he could at least try. He knew one thing though—once the clock struck midnight, he was ripping you out of this bar faster than a racehorse.

“Oh my god thank you,” you drunkenly smile up at Jungkook when he comes back with your drink. In your intoxicated state, you don’t notice Jungkook’s demeanor change as much as other people do. Specifically Jimin, who is standing off from your side, eyeing Jungkook up and down. Jungkook looks nervous, tense, and unsure about his surroundings. Jimin was curious about what happened to him in the last five minutes of him being gone.

“Oh shit you guys, it’s almost midnight!” Taehyung yells throwing an arm around Jimin’s shoulder.

“What are you gonna wish for?” You gaze up at Jungkook as he throws an arm around your frame protectively.

“Is that a thing babe?” He questions, a small smile playing on his lips.

“Of course it is!” You say, your expression wide and full of disbelief. “I mean I always do it.”

Jungkook leans down and pecks your forehead, his vision fuzzier now that the 3 shots of whiskey have been through his system, “Well I’ll make a wish then, just for you.”

“You better,” you wiggle your eyebrows at him. The clock hits 11:59 PM and the countdown to the new year begins.

Jungkook’s grip tightens around you, afraid that if he lets go you’ll find out his deepest secret and run away from him forever. You lean your head on his chest, unknowing of anything that’s bothering him deep down. You inhale his scent, his laundry and cologne intoxicating you even further.

Ten… nine… eight… seven… six… five… four… three… two… one!

You look up at Jungkook with another beautiful smile and he leans down to close the short gap between you two. The cheers around you drown out as you focus on each other. One of your hands pulls him down from the back of his hair closer to you, smiling into the kiss.

You wish for nothing to change—you were happy and had your partner—that’s all you could ever wish for.

Jungkook wishes for things to change—to go back to normal—but he was afriad that there wasn’t going to be a normal for you two ever again.

Jungkook makes love to you that night like you have never experienced. Every kiss, every touch, every breath is so slow and calculated. He thrusts deep and hard into you, hitting your cervix with each snap of his hips. You both are drunk but if anything that makes it all the better. You two are fully relaxed in each other’s arms and it was just you and him in that moment. He makes you come two, three, and by the fourth time you can’t breathe. His hands grip your waist and under your ass pushing himself possibly deeper into you.

You hold his face close to yours as he drowns out your half screams and moans with his lips. When he finally comes after holding back to relish each second of his cock being inside of you, it’s the most glorious orgasm he’s ever had.

“Fuck—“ you cut him off with your lips as he stills inside of you. “I love you,” he breathes out heavily, collapsing on his elbows.

“I love you,” you whisper back.

He kisses your collarbone and around your neck, trying to hold back his tears threatening to fall.

“I love you more,” is the last thing he says that night before you two drift off into sleep. He means every word.

University starts back up a couple weeks after New Years. Your final round of classes were starting off great—most of them being bullshit electives. You were going to enjoy your last semester here and you refused to waste yourself away in school work before hitting the “real world.” You didn’t have any classes with Jungkook or Namjoon this semester which was somewhat of a bummer but you would survive.

Jungkook wasn’t doing good to say the least. He was stressed more and more each day. He barely had a good nights sleep in weeks—waking up every few hours thinking about two very different girls in his life. He had begun to converse with Rose over text message so he didn’t seem like a grade-A asshole. Every time he sent or received a text back, his stomach churned and his heart yearned. He couldn’t help himself—this is how the universe works. It was the hardest thing for him to keep a secret like this from you. He hated lying to you and he wasn’t sure how much longer he could do it.

He turned to his photography more than ever in the past few weeks. His hobby slowly becoming his life to distract him from his actual problems. It’s how he found himself early out in the morning, before 7 AM to be exact, shooting the sunrise from a river about ten minutes from his apartment. He was playing with his new toy and lenses that Junghyun had gifted him, loving the camera the more shots he snapped. He didn’t have class until noon and he couldn’t sleep and he couldn’t think of a better way to pass the time.

It was quiet and peaceful. He loved the countryside and this spot reminded him of back home. It was freezing to say the least and he quickly threw on his gloves before he went through his recent captures.

“Jungkook?” His name leaves a female and his chest twists—recognizing who it is immediately. He looks away from his camera, Rose approaching him from his right. She’s wearing leggings and a thick jacket with running shoes.

“H-hey,” he drops his camera some, “What are you doing up this early?” He asks as she stops in front of him.

“I could ask the same to you,” she smiles breathing heavily. She looks down at his camera before looking back up at his face, “I couldn’t sleep so I decided to go on a run to clear my head.”

He nods slowly, “The best way to clear your head indeed,” he muses. “Same though, to answer your question. Couldn’t sleep and I figured I would come takes some pictures.”

She hesitates before asking her next question, “Can I see?”

Jungkook doesn’t answer immediately, looking down at his camera nervously.

“O-only if you want to though,” she adds picking up on his secluded frame.

His eyes soften and his shoulders drop, “No, it’s fine, here.” He clicks around the buttons to bring up the most recent pictures of the sunrise, the river, and it’s reflection.

“Wow,” Rose whispers, smoke following her words as they hit the cold air as he clicks through each one, “These are great Jungkook.”

He smiles shyly, glancing down her frame, “Thanks.” She’s shorter than you are, her head barely hitting his shoulder.

“Have you been taking pictures for long?” She looks up at him when he’s done showing the pictures.

“A few years now,” he says, “It’s my favorite thing to do with my free time.”

“Well from what I can see you’re really talented,” she smiles, “You should do it professionally.”

He blushes, “A man can only wish,” he laughs, fog coming from his lips too.

A silence falls between the two of them. Jungkook isn’t sure what to do and Rose looks around the area, only a handful of people in the surrounding vicinity.

“Hey I was about to go to this café down the street, wanna come with?” She asks. Jungkook is taken aback by her offer. He notices a sadness behind her eyes and he bites the inside of his cheek before nodding slowly.

“Yeah, that’d be nice.”

The café is small and quiet. It smells of espresso and pastries. Jungkook orders himself a coffee with cream and sugar while Rose decides to get some type of iced drink.

“It’s below freezing and you’re drinking iced coffee?” He quirks a brow at her as they sit down beside the main window.

She shrugs, “I love iced coffee more than I love myself.”

He smiles, sipping on his hot coffee slowly not wanting to burn his tongue. Another silence falls between them and Jungkook takes this time to study her more. She’s petite and gorgeous. She’s the type of girl he grew up crushing over. In the few conversations they’ve had, he knows they are very much alike. Each day talking to her and seeing her pop up in random places in his life proved to him this wasn’t a fluke. Rose was his soulmate and Jungkook was hers. That’s the fucking reality and it fucking sucks for him. He could see himself falling for Rose quicker than anyone else before—that’s what is supposed to happen anyways. But he had you—he didn’t want anyone else. You were his end all be all, not Rose.

“Jungkook,” she speaks lowly, “Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah, of course.”

“Are you seeing someone right now?”

Her question makes his heart rate speed up.

“W-what?” His mouth is dry despite the coffee, “H-how—?”

“One of my friends on New Years saw you leave with a girl,” her voice breaks off. Shit.

“I,” he pauses, unsure of what to say, “It’s complicated.”

Complicated?! He was in a committed relationship that was approaching 6 months!

“I’d rather you tell me the truth than lie Jungkook,” she says. “We’re soulmates, we’re supposed to open up to each other.”

He furrows his eyebrows deeply, “It’s not that easy Rose. I just met you almost month ago.”

His words cut her deep but she stands her ground.

“I get that but,” she pauses, “I just don’t want you and whoever you’re seeing to be hurt. I’m sure you knows what happens when—“

“Yes. I know,” he says. He’s already seen it—you’ve already experienced it. The constant up and down sickness from you was just one side effect of a bonded soul that stays with one who isn’t bonded to them.

“Do you love her?” She asks.

“With everything in me,” he answers honestly. She looks away from her soulmate, unsure of how to feel. She had been waiting for him for 8 years. She was expecting her happy ever after. The last thing she thought would happen is that her soulmate would be in love with someone else. Processing this information was going to difficult for her and she couldn’t begin to imagine what Jungkook was going through right now.

“Have you told her?”

He shakes his head slowly, “No.”

She purses her lips, squeezing her cup a little too hard, “I’m not telling you how to go about this Jungkook, but if you really loved her, why are you continuing to hurt her?”

“Taehyung we have to talk right now,” Jimin says into his phone.

“Baby it’s not even 8 AM,” Taehyung’s morning voice is deeper than his actual voice.

“No—like Taehyung it’s urgent.”

Taehyung is beginning to worry what could possibly be going on.

“Is everything okay?” He asks sitting up in his bed, pushing the hair from his face.

“No,” he says, “Not at all.”

Jimin hangs up the phone and makes his way to Taehyung’s apartment. He half jogs, unable to keep up with his feet. Jimin’s mind is racing as he begins to piece his suspicions together.

“Good morning,” Jimin enters the apartment, a shiver going down his back as he steps into the significantly warmer apartment. Jimin glances around the apartment, his eyes frantic. “Y/N isn’t here, is she?”

Taehyung watches his boyfriend with tired eyes like a hawk. “No, why would she be here?”

Jimin nods quickly, “When did she first get sick?”

“Whoa, Jimin what’s going on?” Taehyung holds his hands up, his brain still not fully functioning.

“Just answer the damn question.”

“Uh, Christmas morning, early in the morning.”

“And has she been sick since then?”

Taehyung furrows his eyebrows, “Um, she mentioned being sick the day after New Years. Jimin this is stupid, she was hungover both days—“

“Do you know who this girl is?” Jimin pulls out his phone, pulling up a picture of Jungkook and a girl neither of them knew sitting at a small cafe across from each other.

“Where did you get this?” Taehyung asks taking his phone to zoom in on the pic.

“This morning,” he says, “I went to the gym and saw those two together.”

“What does this mean? Is Jungkook cheating on Y/N?!” Taehyung feels himself begin to get angry, handing the phone back to Jimin.

“Well according to Hoseok, the bartender from New Years I sometimes see around asked who the girl Jungkook was cuddled up to at the bar on New Years… and it wasn’t Y/N.”

Taehyung’s face clenches, “W-what? I don’t understand what you’re getting at Jimin. Is Jungkook cheating on Y/N?” He asks again.

“Taehyung, don’t you get it?” Jimin asks running a hand through his hair, “I study this stuff for fucksakes! This,” he holds up his phone of the picture again, “She’s Jungkook’s soulmate, Tae.”

His mouth parts open, “H-how are you so sure?”

“I don’t know the full story but I’m guessing a name came up on Jungkook over Christmas and destiny brought them together after being apart for so long…”

“A name? Jimin, Jungkook is 22 like Y/N… they don’t—“

“Late bloomers—it’s rare, but it happens Taehyung.”

“Fuck,” Taehyung breathes out, fully awake now, “So Jungkook has a soulmate and hasn’t told Y/N I’m assuming.”

Jimin nods, “I’m sure of it. She needs to know Taehyung—it’ll only get worse for her the longer Jungkook stays with her,” his voice trails off. Jimin cared for you as much as anyone close to you and he knew the consequences of tangoing with someone else who was soul bonded.

“I’m gonna kill Jungkook,” Taehyung grips his hair harshly, “When should we tell her?”

Jimin hesitates but speaking after thinking about what could happen to you the more Jungkook hides his secret, “The sooner the better.”

“Babe I don’t know how to do this,” you whine as you stares at a knife and a half open salmon. Jungkook laughs at your attempt to filet the fish for your dinner together.

“It’s not that hard Y/N,” he says pointedly, coming to aid your aid. In one motion, Jungkook manages to remove the skin from the fish.

You roll your eyes at him, “Why are you so fucking good at everything?”

“I’m just that talented,” he gives you a side eye before throwing the fish into the marinade. “Are you sure you want to salmon by the way? I know you’re still not feeling the best.”

“Jungkook it’s fine—I’m not going to get sick from this,” you hoped at least, “Plus you love it and I wanted to do something special for our anniversary.”

It was true—today marked your sixth months with Jungkook. January was brutally cold and quickly passed. Now the beginning of February wasn’t any warmer, but it did mark that spring was coming soon.

You couldn’t believe you had been with Jungkook for sixth months. Six months had come and gone like that. It was odd being in a committed relationship for this long when two people weren’t soulmates—but frankly, you were sure Jungkook was your soulmate so it didn’t really matter anyways.

As Jungkook watched you whip up some rice and veggies to go on the side, he couldn’t help but feel guilty. Guiltier than fuck. It had just been over a month since he meet Rose and to put it shortly—the universe was fucking trying it. No matter where he went, she always seemed to be there. They texted at least a few times everyday, obviously keeping it to himself. Rose was being patient, as she was trying her best to understand Jungkook’s situation, though he had a gut feeling she didn’t want to wait around much longer for him. Time was running out for Jungkook and it was running out faster than he ever wished it do be.

You and Jungkook finish and eat dinner together on the couch. Sure he had a small dining room table but it was tradition for the two of you to cuddle up on the couch together for your meals. Plus, his roommates weren’t home so you may as well make yourself comfy.

“What are you thinking about?” you ask Jungkook when he goes silent for a few moments. As much as you loved Jungkook, you knew something had been bothering him for weeks that he hadn’t opened up to you about. If it was something he really wanted to open up with you about, he would have already and you felt it wasn’t your place to prod. When he was ready, he would be ready you suppose.

“Hm?” his doe eyes look into yours before glancing away, “Nothing much… I just can’t believe we’re graduating in three months,” he laughs shaking his head in disbelief.

You agreed with him, “Crazy right… are you scared?”

He looks down at your legs that are draped across his, “Yeah, I am.”

A look falls on his face that you can’t read. He’s blank on the outside but you’re sure deep down whatever he’s thinking about is torturing him.

“Jungkook,” you nudge him, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” he asks with a grimace.

“I don’t know,” you shrug, “I just feel like something has been bothering you.”

He bows his head and you’re sure he’s about to be fully honest with you until he says, “I’m just stressed babe.”

You narrow your eyes at him. Stressed you can believe—but what? School? Family? Us?

“If you don’t tell me what’s wrong I can’t help you Jungkook,” you say. You can visibly see his jaw clenching as he grinds his teeth.

“If I wanted you to know don’t you think I would fucking tell you Y/N?” he snaps and it makes you jump in your position, “Don’t be so goddamn nosy if it’s none of your business.”

Jungkook stands up from the couch and your mouth parts at his words. Not only are you taken aback, but you can’t believe Jungkook actually spoke to you like that.

“Don’t fucking talk to me like that,” you stand up and make your way towards him. He’s lean against the counter, his head down. “Jungkook, hey, what the fuck?” you ask him, beginning to get more and more frustrated as each second passes.

He lifts his head to look at you, a pained expression on his features, “Look I’m sorry—“

He’s cut off by heavy knocks on your door. Neither of were expecting anyone and if it was his roommates, they would have just used their keys. Your eyes follow Jungkook when he goes and opens the door. What happens next goes by so fast you weren’t even sure it happened until Jungkook is stumbling backwards, a groan emitting from his lips.

“Taehyung?!” you nearly scream rushing over to Jungkook, “What the fuck?! What are you doing?!” Taehyung walks into the apartment with Jimin close behind him.

“Ow, fuck man,” Jungkook holds his cheek in pain. Taehyung didn’t look like he had much power but he just proved himself wrong.

“Have you told her yet,” Taehyung speaks, looking straight at Jungkook, “Or are you still lying to her?”

You look between the two of them, your mind racing and confused.

“Told me what? Taehyung what the fuck are you doing, are you crazy?!” you yell at him again.

Jungkook and Taehyung continue to glare at each other. Jungkook notices Jimin staring too and he knows—it’s over.

“Not right now Taehyung,” Jungkook says angrily. You whip your head over Jungkook again. What’s going on?!

“Told me what?” you ask looking back over at Taehyung and then Jungkook again, “Told me what Jungkook?!” you raise your voice at him.

“Y/N,” Jungkook says, his eyes full of a wave of sadness. Your heart begins to race, your hands clammy and you feel like you might get sick again.

“What’s going on Jungkook?” you feel tears begin to well in your eyes. You know something isn’t right, otherwise this would not be happening right now.

“I was gonna tell you,” Jungkook’s voice breaks off as he comes closer to you, taking your hands in his, “I just didn’t know how.”

You feel a tear come down your face, “Baby what’s happening?”

“Hurry the fuck up,” Taehyung spits, “We don’t have all night.”

“Taehyung,” Jimin scolds him from behind.

Jungkook doesn’t break his gaze with you as he lets go of your hands. He pulls the sleeve of his left sweatshirt, moving his silver watch back in the process. When your eyes fall onto it—the name—it feels like you’ve been shot in the chest. Your breathing picks up and you look back into Jungkook’s eyes.

You shake your head, “No, no, no,” you mumble, “This is a joke right? This has to be a fucking joke,” the tears are now falling in rhythmic streams down your face.

“I’m so sorry,” Jungkook says, tears now welling his eyes eyes, “Y/N I love you so much—“

“How long have you known?” you step away from him, feeling light headed and queazy. He doesn’t answer until you press again. “How long have you fucking known Jungkook?!”

“Over a month,” his voice drops and you don’t ever think you’ve felt the sharp pains shooting in your chest until now.

“Y/N,” Jimin speaks this time, “I think you should come with us.”

“You’ve been lying to me all this time?” you ignore Jimin, your voice cracking on the edges.

“Y/N, no baby please,” he steps towards you, his hands finding your face, “I-I didn’t know what to d-do. I l-love you and you only you, nothing will ever change that,” Jungkook pleads. You shake your head, pushing him away from you.

“It changes everything Jungkook!” you yell at him, furiously wiping the tears from your face, “You’ve known about your soulmate for a goddamn month and you thought you could hide that from me?! Are you kidding me Jungkook?!”

Jungkook pulls at the roots of his hair, glancing over to Taehyung and Jimin, “I’m sorry Y/N,” he repeats, “W-we can do something about this, there has to be—“

“No,” you spit, “No, it doesn’t fucking matter anymore Jungkook,” you pause, glancing down at your hands, “There’s no way around this and you lied to me.”

“Y/N, please,” Jungkook’s heart breaks all over again as he watches you gather your things, shoving your feet into your shoes.

“Take this,” you rip the ring that suddenly didn’t mean anything to you anymore off your finger, shoving it into Jungkook’s palm. He stares at the jewelry, his eyes watery and blurry.

“Come on,” Taehyung says holding out his arm for you. With one last glance at Jungkook, you turn on your feet and walk out of his apartment. Jimin shuts the door behind of you two and you don’t even make it to their car when you break down into a full sob, Taehyung wrapping his arms around you protectively. You didn’t just walk out of Jungkook’s apartment—you’ve walked out of his life too.

SPRING

Spring was always your favorite season. The blossoming of trees and flowers always seemed to cheer up your mood. More sunlight meant more happiness and less seasonal depression. The warming weather was always a nice touch after cruel and harsh winters. This year though, you thought no one could hate Spring as much as you did.

Everyday was new challenge for you. When you and Jungkook first broke up—your feelings were indescribable. The mental and physical chest pains you experienced from your heartbreak were sure the worst you could ever have. You were a broken soul—a soul not meant for someone who you loved more than life itself sometimes.

It was hard doing simple things—getting out of bed, doing your laundry, going to class, eating meals—it was all such a burden to you. You cried and cried and cried until you had no more tears left. Sleep was even worse as it meant your unconscious state always drifted into thoughts of Jungkook. There was the time frame where Jungkook called you, left messages and voicemails, tried to contact you through Taehyung and others—but it was all the more painful. However, you couldn’t bring yourself to rid any trace of him from your phone, afraid that you might forget what he looked or sounded like.

No one had ever seen you in such a broken state. You thought you’re mind couldn’t drift into worse territory until one night, you thought about Jungkook and his soulmate—whoever she was. You thought about him loving her, making love to her, taking pictures of her, marrying her, having kids with her, looking at her the way he looked at you—it completely shattered you even more. You don’t remember how much you drank that night. One shot of vodka? Two? Seven? Glasses of wine? It didn’t matter you just needed to forget.

It was when Taehyung found you that night passed out over your toilet, is when he recommended seeing someone. At first, your idea of going to a therapist over a failed relationship seemed silly. But Taehyung made sure that you and Jungkook were more than a college fling—it was real and it was going to take a lot of time to get over.

Your therapist was a nice woman, upper forties maybe, slim face and blonde hair. Your first couple sessions with her didn’t go as smooth as you wished for. She asked you hard questions that you weren’t willing to answer. The third session you went to, you broke down in front of a stranger becoming the most vulnerable you’d ever been.

She knew you loved Jungkook and he loved you just as deeply too. She explained soul-bonding more in depth to you that day. The universe has a reason why it pairs two souls together and why some people are left bare. It’s a phenomenon that’s barely studied but she suspects it’s more common than people want to believe. There’s also a process called soul-breaking, that is rare too but the consequences can bare far greater risks so majority of the people stay away from it.

Overall, you grew up your whole life thinking something was wrong with you. You thought you were a glitch because you didn’t receive a name on your body at 18. But if anything, meeting with your therapist made you realize that nothing was wrong with you. You live a healthy life, have a family, have friends, and you fell in love with someone—and all that is okay.

“I do believe if two people are meant to be together, they will be, someway or somehow,” she said to you one day.

Nearly two months after your break up and one month left until graduation—it was still hard. You had been prescribed antidepressants for a few weeks now and while it did numb your pain for the most part, there were times when thinking about Jungkook just made you want to curl into a ball and forget about your tasks for that day. You told yourself you needed to stop doing that though—you had to be strong otherwise you couldn’t move forward.

“Here you go,” Taehyung plops down a cup of steaming coffee and a bagel in front of you. Your stomach growls at the site.

“Thank you,” you give him a smile, “I’m starved.”

“I bet, you’ve been writing that paper for fucking hours,” he says digging into his own bagel with salmon and cream cheese. You should mention you hated salmon too now.

Taehyung was the greatest friend anyone could have, that you were sure of. Everyday, he called or texted to check in on you. He brought you food to make sure you were eating. Him and Jimin would invite you to the movies or restaurants with them. You refrained from going out to bars with them, too afraid you might run into the wrong people. Nonetheless, without Taehyung by your side, you were sure these past two months would have been much more difficult.

“I got my cap and gown in the mail,” he sings songs scrolling through his phone.

“Jesus Christ Tae, can you believe we’re graduating college?”

He laughs, “I said the same thing when we graduated high school,” he glances at you, “Look at us now bitches!” he holds his arms out dramatically.

You laugh at him, chewing on your food slowly. If there was one positive about being alone the past two months, it meant your illness had gone away completely. Your therapist explained how illnesses of different forms can plague people who play a role in betraying a soul-bonded person. Though you already knew that from your project last semester.

“Did you ever hear back from that company?” Taehyung asks you as you mule over in small conversation.

“Uh yeah,” you smile shyly, playing with the ends of your hair.

“Welllll?”

“I got an offer, if I want it,” your smile widens even more. Taehyung’s mouth drops open before it melts into his signature boxy smile.

“Wait, really? Holy shit, Y/N that’s amazing!”

“Thanks,” you look away from him, heating rushing to your cheeks. It was an exciting opportunity and you felt this was the path for you.

“But wait hold on,” he pauses, “Does this mean… you’re moving? To New York City?”

There’s the bombshell you haven’t dropped on many people yet. New York City. It was always a dream of yours to possibly live there one day. And now with nothing holding you back here, when you applied for the company and they asked a preferred location—you said fuck it.

“Yeah, later in the summer,” your voice is low. Taehyung’s shoulders drop, his happy mood diminishing ever so slightly.

“New York…” he ticks, “Well I’ve always wanted to go there so I’ll have to visit once or five times a year.”

You nod giving him a short wink, focusing on the rest of you coffee and food. Slowly but surely, you were getting better. You knew that your future days would be filled with five steps forward, two steps back but it was the natural process. Once you graduated and moved onto to bigger and better things—you’ll understand that this chapter, while thick and important, was only just a chapter. You have another one already waiting at the starting line to begin.

Jungkook was numb—literally numb as a needle digs in and out of skin, inking a flower onto his forearm. He had this one for awhile, but it still needed the little details to perfect the tattoo to his liking. His first tattoos, the scattered pieces on his hands were the most painful. However, now as he has a good amount of ink on his arm all the way to his shoulder, the pain isn’t there that much. He almost likes the stinging sensation as it gives him something to focus on rather than his intrusive thoughts.

The past few months haven’t been easy on him. Watching you walk away from him hit him harder than when Rose’s name showed up on his skin. And he just let you. Sure, he called and texted and persisted as much as he could but he knew he should have done more. He should have explained in more depth why he did what he did. Yes, it was because he loved you with every fiber of his being, but he genuinely didn’t care if he was meant for someone else. He wanted to be with you despite the situation present. There was surely something he could do to make it right but you were long gone from his life. He was stuck in a hole and he didn’t know how to get out.

Jungkook and Rose saw each other more frequently after his break up. She was so kind and so patient with him, he knew she deserved so much more. She never rushed anything with him, always waiting for his moves. The first time he kissed her, there was tingling deep in his chest. As great as kissing Rose was, she could never compare to you. It was hard and confusing for him to understand. He’s heard all his life—when soulmates cross paths and become intimate with each other, their whole world begins to revolve around them. That wasn’t the case though. As much as he was being pulled in by Rose, he was being pulled into a completely different direction. That wasn’t how bonded souls worked, he knew that much.

“You’re not very talkative today,” his tattooist comments as she wipes away the leftover ink on his arms. Jungkook always preferred a female to do his tattoos as they seem to have more control and a gentler grip.

“Just a lot on my mind,” he shrugs turning his head towards the tattoo needle.

“Women issues?” she raises an eyebrow at him.

“Is it that obvious?” he half laughs.

“My job requires a lot of listening and giving advice,” she says, “I know a damsel in distress when I see one.”

He doesn’t say anything as he watches the way she furrows her eyebrows, getting closer to his skin to add the finishing touches.

“Are you still with, Y/N? Was it?” she then asks. The mention of your name sends his face pale. How many months had it been since he last saw you or mentioned you? One, two, three? All of his days blended together so he’s lost track of time.

He shakes his head slowly, “No.”

She looks at him from the corner of her eyes, “Really? I thought you were gonna marry her?”

He bites down on his bottom lip to hold down his emotions before saying, “That was the plan until the universe decided to throw me bullshit.”

She’s never heard Jungkook sound angry. He’s always been very polite and an overall happy person. Jungkook felt he had a right to be angry and resentful. Unfortunately, that anger and resentment was sometimes projected onto those people around him. His roommates had to walk on eggshells around him now, afraid he might fully break if they said one wrong thing to him.

“When did this happen?” she knows exactly what he’s referring to.

“A few months back, around Christmas.”

“Have you met them yet? Your partner?” she pauses when she notices Jungkook’s jaw clenching as he’s staring at the ceiling now, “You don’t have to say anything if you’re uncomfortable. I just like to think I’m good at giving advice, is all.”

“Yeah, we’ve met,” he contemplates elaborating but does so anyways, “But it’s not this big grand affair that I was told about my whole life. She’s amazing and just my type, but… she’s not her. I like her a lot, but I don’t get the same fiery feeling I had with Y/N.”

“Hm,” she muses, putting down the tattoo gun, “You’re done,” she gives a small smile at him. He holds up his arm to inspect the new ink.

“Thanks, it looks great,” he gives her a small smile as she begins the aftercare process of petroleum jelly and a bandage.

“Can I see your mark?” she asks. He nods before shimmying his watch down his arm, revealing Rose’s name in thin cursive. The mark itself is still very much there, but recently it’s begun to fade and he wasn’t sure why.

“Sorry if I’m giving you too much information,” he laughs feeling slightly awkward as she inspects the name.

“It’s fine, I’m the one that asked,” she chuckles again before she sits back in her chair and begins to lift her own sleeve up. He’s confused as to what’s she doing but when she lays out her hand, he sees it. “This showed up when I was nineteen,” he reads the name that’s barely visible anymore—almost looking like a scar.

“Why’s it not dark anymore?” he asks.

“The same reason yours is fading too,” she looks back at his wrist.

“What do you mean fading?” so he wasn’t crazy—it was actually fading.

“It’s what happens when someone’s heart belongs to someone else,” she says, “I don’t know how to explain it but it occurs more than you think.”

She wraps up Jungkook’s forearm and he’s more confused than ever.

“The world is so fucked up,” he comments closing his eyes and pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Heard that,” she nods in agreement, “Come on, I’ll ring you up.”

That day into the tattoo shop was a good day for him. It felt nice to open up about his situation to someone who seemingly understood what he was going through. Yes, the world was fucked up but so was everyone living in it. He didn’t understand the full meaning of his mark fading but he knew in the long run, he would deal with whatever was thrown at him. He had to otherwise he was going to live a long, miserable life. Besides, he knows that you would want him to be happy even though you probably hated him for what he did. He wants the same for you because at the end of the day, if he knew you were happy—he would be too.

. The smile on your face as you threw your cap into the air was probably the biggest and most genuine smile you’ve put on for months. The cheers and clapping from everyone in the room drowned out any tears that formed in your eyes. Of course you were happy to be done with university, but it was very bittersweet. The last four years of your life have been the best and worst possible. Everything you’ve learned here, you were sure would live with you for the rest of your life.

You find your parents and younger sister after the ceremony. The hug with your dad is the best you’ve had in a long time. He squeezes you tight, picking you up slightly.

“Gah, we’re so proud of you Y/N,” your mom dabs the inner corners of her eyes as she watches the seen unfold.

“I can’t believe my baby is graduated,” your dad pulls away, ruffling your hair a bit.

“Hey! Stop I spent time on this,” you step away from him, smoothing down your roots.

“Does this mean we get to go to New York now?” your big sister, Mia asks your parents. She’s pulls you into a hug which you exhale deeply in return. You didn’t get to see your sister as much as you wished, but growing up she was your rock. She was the best role model you could have asked for.

“Of course,” you say, “Only if you bring me bags and bags of those honey butter chips.”

“Anything you want we can bring it, or ship it!” your mom nods enthusiastically.

“What about me?” you turn around at the voice of Taehyung, throwing your arms around him.

“Holy shit Taehyung we’ve done it!” you exclaim. Your parents give you a slide on your language in front of them, understanding the circumstance.

“Mia! What’s up!?,” Taehyung pokes your sister on the shoulder before giving her a quick hug. He holds up his diploma and smiles, “Four years and thousands upon thousands of dollars later, we’ve made it.”

“Do you still wanna go downtown? Grab some dinner?” you ask your parents and they nod excitedly.

“Definitely—you choose wherever,” your father smiles. “Taehyung, you and Jimin are welcome to come if you don’t have any plans.”

“Oh we will definitely be there,” he smiles, “Just text me where you guys are going. I gotta go find the devil and my parents through all this mess. See you later!”

Later ended up being at a nicer restaurant downtown that you had never been to—too broke as a college student to ever think about coming here for dinner. You mulled over conversation with glasses of wine and good food, Taehyung being the star of the dinner table. Jimin smiled lovingly at his partner, slightly jealous that you and Taehyung were now finished with school. He’s got another year left in his master’s program so he’ll be graduated this time next year.

When you’re finally done with dinner, you part with your parents and sister for the evening outside the restaurant when you run into an all familiar face.

“Y/N?”

You turn to the source, “Namjoon?” a smile spreads over your face and you quickly make your way to him and give him a squeeze.

“Congrats!” he smiles when you pull away, looking back over your shoulder.

“You too, I can’t believe we’re done,” you laugh taking in his attire. He’s dressed in a nice button down and dress pants, glasses resting on his face looking dapper as ever. “Oh this is my family,” you introduce the them.

“Nice to meet you,” he smiles, “This is Kaya,” he smiles and you didn’t even realize he had company with him. You introduce yourselves to each other and she’s got to be one of the most beautiful girls you’ve met. They look damn good together.

“Nice to meet you,” you return your own smile.

“Is dinner here good?” he asks all of you. Everyone agrees in response and he looks over to Kaya, “Well, it was good to meet you all. Let’s catch up one day? You’re gonna be around in the city right?”

“A city yes,” Mia interjects crossing her arms, slightly envious of you, “Not this one, but New York City.”

Namjoon raises his eyebrows at you, “Wow, big girl things huh?”

You laugh repeating his words, “Big girl things.”

Namjoon and Kaya leave into the bustling restaurant after some finals words and you’re finally parting ways with your family. You mom and dad give you another bone crushing hug before they have to go back home. Mia looks at you with a sadness in her eyes and you furrow your eyebrows at her.

“What’s wrong?” you ask her as she hides herself in her shell.

“I don’t want you to leave,” she pouts, slumping her shoulders.

“I still have a few more months home,” you give her a smile, “And I promise you can visit me and I’ll come back as much as I can.”

“Promise?” she holds up her pinky. You link your pinkies together before nodding your head.

You bid your farewell’s to your family one last time before you’re left alone with Jimin and Taehyung.

“Your sister is funny,” Jimin comments as you begin to walk in the opposite direction of them. Your heels were absolutely killing your feet and you were tempted to take them off but thinking about the dirt and grim on the street made you think otherwise.

“She’s sweet on the outside but damn she can be a handful,” you laugh.

“She’s almost twenty five babe, about to hit her first mid-life crisis what do you expect?” Taehyung says.

Minuscule conversation occurs between the three of you before they have to part ways too. Taehyung and Jimin were meeting up with Taehyung’s parents at a bar just outside the city to celebrate. The sun was now setting, the air warm and sticky as you hugged them off. You were walking back to the parking garage that you had your car when something catches your eye on the way. Downtown was filled with bars, restaurants, boutiques and what nots, but you’ve never seen this before. It was an art studio of sorts, pictures—digital and art canvases—hanging from the windows.

You stared at the plexiglass, a sense of familiarity crossing your mind the longer you stared at the blown up photographs. You take a peak at the hours listed on the door and see that they don’t close for another twenty minutes or so. Curiosity getting the best of you, you swing open the door, silence engulfing you as you step in.

Your heels clink against the hardwood, glancing around the space. It’s quite spacious, pictures lining the walls up and down all the way to the back. A few art pieces are strayed in the middle of the floor. You walk slowly around the gallery, admiring the painted canvases and shots of various things. You pick up there’s different artists and photographs displaying their works and when you get towards the back left corner of the place, you stop in your tracks.

A gallery of scenic pictures ranging from clouds, to the sea, to the cityscapes, and more hang beautifully in thin frames. Something twists inside you as you feel deep down that you’ve seen some of these before you just cannot put your finger on it. It’s when you see a picture to the farthest right when you feel yourself skipping a breath. Your mouth parts when you realize what it it—or who it is. It’s you. It’s black and white film developed, the side of your face looking off into the distance with trees behind you. Your mind flashes back to that day in the park—with Jungkook—a small picnic he set up when you first got together.

“Y/N?” you whip around at the sound of your name.

“J-Jungkook?” his name leaves your lips instantly. He’s emerged from a back room stopping dead in his tracks. You’re speechless. He looks so good—better than you remember. His hair a little longer with blonde tips, a white button up, sleeves rolled up with black slacks that he fills out perfectly.

“H-hey,” he speaks first. His eyes trailing up and down your body quickly. You subconsciously glance down at your frame, the white dress and heels you’re wearing hoping to match how he good looks. “What are you doing here?”

“I—“ you pause looking back at the pictures, “I was just passing by and was curious, I didn’t know this place existed.”

Slowly, he steps closer to you shoving his hands in his pockets. His ears are red and he can’t believe that you’re here, looking at his favorite picture he ever took of you.

“It just opened up recently,” he says getting closer to you, though leaving a considerable amount of space between you two. “I started selling some of my pieces through here,” he explains.

“That’s great Jungkook,” you give him a small smile to hide the hurt you’re actually feeling. It’s been months and suddenly all of your progress seems to have backtracked. He was so beautiful—the most perfect man you have ever met—and he’s standing here before you again. Jungkook can’t believe his eyes either—you’re here, feet away from him, something he thought he’d never see anymore.

“How are you doing?” he asks, unable to take his off you. You can feel him staring holes into you and you can’t bring yourself to look at him just yet.

“I’m good, you?” you continuously stare at his photos, feeling self conscious the more you stand in his presence.

“I’m okay,” better now that you’re here, is what he wants to say, but he refrains. “You look good,” he says and you look over and up at him, meeting his eye contact.

“You too,” you nod, your eyes trailing down to his wrist, not even realizing what you’re doing. His watch still there, hasn’t moved since the last time you saw him. You feel a tingle in your fingertips and chest, unable to hide your awkwardness.

“Y/N,” he stops himself so you’ll look at him again. Fuck, he loves it when you look at him like that. “Would you want to get some coffee one day? Or something like that?” his words are brave and you can’t believe he said them.

As much as you know you shouldn’t—that you might be setting yourself up for further hurt—something between the two makes you say otherwise. Besides, you’ve been hurt enough, what’s a little more going to do?

You slowly with a small smile, “What about right now? A-are you free?”

He glances at his photos with a small smile in return before glancing back to you, his shoulders slumping as if a weight has been lifted from his shoulders.

“Yeah… yeah I’m free.”

#goldenclosetnet #btsgoldnet #heartsforbts #jungkook #jungkook drabble #jungkook scenario #jungkook x you #jungkook x oc #jungkook x reader #jungkook angst #jungkook smut #jungkook fluff #bts smut #bts fluff #bts angst #jungkook oneshot #soulmate au #college au #jeon jungkook

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superhero--imagines · 3 years

Text

Part 12

Part 1 Here! / Part 2 Here! / Part 3 Here! / Part 4 Here! / Part 5 Here! / Part 6 Here! / Part 7 Here! / Part 8 Here! / Part 9 Here! / Part 10 Here! / Part 11 Here!

* You stare at the blank ceiling, the smooth unblemished surface like freshly fallen snow

* you should really put some nudie posters up there or something to lighten the mood a little.

* Light notes from the piano float around your room

* You sigh, so these are the facts as you know them:

* Edward is your best friend who has occasional bouts of brooding and flirtatious behavior.

* Bella is not albino, she has a lovely peach undertone, and a lovely grilled peach scent

* The entire coven has treated your attraction to this young lady’s blood like you got caught masturbating or wetting the bed or something

* “You don’t need to be embarrassed it’s a perfectly natural feeling.” Esme tells you while rubbing your shoulders

* “We’ve all been there” Rosalie reassures

* “Totally not a big deal, it happens to me everyday!” Jasper chimes in

* You wish sunlight hurt you so you could combust into flames on the spot

* The piano notes get louder, and you feel your mouth pinch into a frown.

* “Oh my god Edward! Read the room, I want brooding music!”

* Edward stops, up until then he had been playing a pretty cheerful Mozart piece

* You can tell he wants to ask why, you’ve been radiating joy non-stop since biology. But he decides against it

* “You really shouldn’t eat lying down.” He says as you sip blood while lying flat on your bed.

* “Okay dad.” You snort

* Edward starts to imagine what it would be like if you called him ‘daddy’

* All needy on top of him, your hands curled in fists against his chest, the breathy “daddy please” that leaves your mouth

* All of a sudden he’s ugly turned on

* “Ugh you’re no fun, I’m going to hang out with Rosalie”

* You leave the room and Edward has a total meltdown, is this what a kink is? Is he discovering a kink?!? At 100 years of age?!?!?!?

* Edward.exe is broken

* You don’t even make it to Rosalie’s room, you can smell them a mile away

* Broccoli, sugar and fat, and axe body spray. No peaches you realize with a sigh.

* They’ve only just barely rung the door bell when you open the door

* “Hey what are you guys doing here?”

* Jessica’s standing in front, looking pretty at ease, while Mike and Angela look equally uncomfortable.

* Makes sense, Jessica’s here all the time now either for homework or to watch TV.

* Mike and Angela haven’t been back since your sweet sixteen

* “How did you get down here so fast?”

* “I saw your car from upstairs” you say with a sheepish smile.

* You wish Alice would have given you a heads up, you weren’t planning on pretending to be human right now. Still you probably look raggedy enough right now in sweatpants and an oversized sweatshirt

* You can probably pull this sick thing off

* “We just wanted to check up on you, I heard from Mike and Angela you got sick during class.” And then in a more annoyed tone Jessica adds “And I guess you’re too sick to respond to all my texts and calls”

* Oh crap, where is your phone.

* You pat your pockets, and think when you saw it last

* “I left it in my locker” you smack your head. You told Edward to go grab your bag from class but you forgot your phone.

* “Hey don’t worry about it, I can get it for you tomorrow if you want.” Jessica rushes to your side and pats your arm. You shake your head

* “No I can get it myself, I’m fine I just ate something bad.” You mumble.

* You’re not missing school tomorrow. You would literally risk murder to smell Bella again.

* It’s not insatiable thirst like described in the books, more like a craving, like someone might have for nachos.

* It itches at you for a while, but if you just distract yourself long enough you can move on

* “Would you like to come in? I think Esme just baked cookies or scones or something.”

* Esme likes to bake for the smell and donate the food to the local shelter. That, or take it for her employees at her architectural firm in town.

* Firm is a loose word, she has maybe four employees, and they get one job a month, but it seems to make her happy.

* Angela and Mike give each other looks but Jessica perks up

* “Is she making those delicious earl grey scones again?” You sniff the air

* “I think she made some of that orange zest butter too”

* “Omg I am so happy you left your phone at school” Jessica giggles walking inside past you, you hear her greet Esme with a squeal

* “They really are good.” You tell them and your remaining human friends enter the house carefully

* “Soooo where is everyone?” Mike asks taking a look around your living room.

* “Ummm Rosalie’s in the garage, Alice is probably meditating on the roof, Emmett’s at swim practice, and Jasper’s probably at the barn.”

* “What about Edward?” Angela asks before Mike can ask about the barn

* Last you saw him he was playing the piano in your room, but it’s been a while since then

* “He’s probably in his room monologuing about the degradation of the American dream or something.”

* You lead them into the kitchen where Esme and Jessica are already deep in conversation about the wonder of her baking

* “-side is so light and fluffy, how do you get the tea flavor though”

* “Witchcraft.” Esme jokes, giving a full smile before putting another tray in the oven. Only Jessica laughs, the other two are too nervous to even sit down

* “Why don’t I teach you how when you come over next week.”

* Yeah you’re pretty sure Jessica is really only a fan of the “eating” and not of the “baking”

* You’re half surprised when she seems happy at the invitation.

* “Oh that sounds great, I can’t wait for it!” Jessica’s practically beaming

* Where’s Edward when you need him? You wonder what her motivations are.

* Jasper is not going to like this. He’s already irritated enough that he’s kicked out of his own house every Friday when Jessica comes over to watch arrested development

* Before you can say anything to Esme the conversation moves forward

* “Did you guys hear about that security guard that died in Mason county?”

* She’s just making small talk, you know that. But you and Esme instantly tense at the mention

* Carlisle had mentioned he thought there was a nomad wandering through, they were still far enough not to cause the coven immediate trouble, but anything that brought more attention to them was a disadvantage

* “My Dad says he heard from Chief Swan it was probably a wild animal attack” Mike mumbles over a bite of scone, you figured he would be the easiest to win over with food

* You hide a smile behind your hand, he really is like a golden retriever

* “What kind of a wild animal climbs stairs into a building” Jessica mumbles over another bite of scone. And maybe to fit in, or maybe because she’s always been a nervous eater, Angela takes a bite too.

* “Oh wow, these are really good” she murmurs

* Esme Cullen ladies and gentleman, winning the hearts of teenagers with baked goods since 19XX

* “Well you kids stay safe, stay together if you can.” She pats your head and you nod.

* You don’t know the details of the attack, you get the feeling Carlisle still see’s you as a kid and he doesn’t want to burden you.

* But assuming the small changes that have happened have nothing to do with the large changes, that means Laurent, James and Victoria will be passing through soon.

* Maybe it’s for the best Bella doesn’t get involved with Edward until later.

* You’d really like to not get all mixed up in the whole “James Thing” if you can help it.

* “Are you staying for dinner? I’m thinking of whipping up some pasta, maybe a chicken?” Esme looks to you, yeah you have no idea how she’s going to manage that. Besides the baking basics there’s no actually food in this kitchen. And the one upstairs is just for your blood bags.

* “(Y/N), do you think...Carlisle would mind if we used one of... his chickens?”

* His chickens? The only chickens in the house-

* “No Esme! My chickens are only for love and chicken snuggles” and their blood which tastes very leans yet rich. “Not to eat!”

* “It would just be one-we’ll eat your least favorite!”

* You’re really hoping this is her way of chasing the humans out because she doesn’t want to cook.

* “No- oh my god- we’re going to the diner come on!” You say tugging Jessica and Angela to stand.

* “It was great seeing you again Mrs. Cullen, see you next week!” Jessica shouts as the three of them follow you out.

* “Going out? Is that such a good idea it’s late and a school night.” Edward says as he descends down the stairs

* “Oh my god, yes Dad I’ll be home before my curfew.” You say before leaving, cue Edward crumbling onto the stairs as he imagines you calling him “daddy” again

* “I’m going to hell, I’m definitely going to hell.” He mumbles, his face in his hand.

* It’s a really short drive to the diner, also known as the only place to eat in Forks in the mid 2000’s.

*There’s not even a McDonald’s. It’s almost sad

* And when you get there, while everyone moves ahead to the table you see a familiar face.

* “Oh, Hey Bella”

* Your eyes met and you figured it would be rude not to say anything. It looks like she’s here having dinner with her Dad.

*She really does look like her dad, same eyes, same cheekbones.

* “Nice to see you again Chief Swan”

* “Nice to see you too, how’s Carlisle doing? Heard it’s been busy at the hospital.”

* “Yeah, it’s like he doesn’t sleep anymore.” You grin at your own joke.

* “Are you feeling alright now?” Bella asks, she looks genuinely concerned

* “Yeah, I um, made some questionable food choices at lunch.”

* There’s an awkward moment of silence. You get the impression that Chief Swan and his daughter are both the “strong silent” types.

* It looks like they’ve both finished eating already

* If you had known she was going to be here you would have made Edward come with you.

* “Oh hey, do you want to join us for dinner?” It just seems like the friendly thing to do for the new girl, something on-brand with human character

* Definitely not because if you get on her good side now, maybe she won’t kick you out once her and Edward get married.

*Father and daughter exchange a glance and the familiar connection they have makes you nervous.

*“Of course you don’t have to, I know you’re here with your dad so-“

* “I’m sure Bella would love to join-“ Charlie says at the same time Bella says:

* “Wouldn’t it be kind of weird since I already ate.”

* Ah, so they’re not as in sync as you thought.

* You give your best “Golden Girl - You can totally trust me with your daughter” smile.

* “I’m actually not eating either,” you place a hand over your stomach like a human might. “The uh, Clam Linguine is still haunting me, so I’m sticking to broth and sprite.”

* Why did you say Clam? You don’t even eat meat, it’s how you’ve been getting away with eating so little at lunch.

* “not a lot of vegetarian choices” You say to your human friends who nod solemnly.

* Father and Daughter exchange another look likening telepathic communication and they both move to stand

* “I’m going to finish up some paperwork at the precinct, don’t stay out to late.” Charlie says, leaning down to kiss his daughter on the forehead

* You watch with warm eyes and a small smile twitching onto your lips

* Bella is so loved.

* You can’t believe she’s willing to break her dad’s heart just so she can be 19 forever.

* Which, as you are 19 forever, you can fairly say is overrated

* “Hey guys Bella’s joining us.”

* Your female friends offer her a polite smile, you see Angela gaze flick from the menu to Bella’s face. Silently calculating the worth of this opportunity

* Any intel on this new girl would be pretty valuable

* Same old Angela

* Mike sits up straight so fast that he actually knocks his silverware off the table.

* “H-hey Bella, Hi, w-what, what are you doing here?”

* “Eating.” Bella says it so bluntly that you can’t help but laugh.

* Mike flushes bright red and Jessica and Angela exchange a look before giggling.

* “I thought it would be cool if she came over since I didn’t get to talk to her much.” You take a seat next to Jessica and Bella follows by taking the last seat between you and Mike.

* You still catch whiffs of her scent her and there, especially when she’s sitting so close to you.

* But it’s not so bad, the peachy smell is making you a little lightheaded, but you can handle it.

* At least you’re not fantascizing about killing her and everyone in this room like a certain dork you know.

* “Do you guys want to do that promotion where we get the basket of fries for the table?” Jessica asks

* “I don’t like sharing fries with Mike he eats them all.” Angela mumbles

* Yeah you remember last time when after a football game the three of them actually sat down and divided the plate in three equal portions

* They even measured out each fry dividing up the extra long ones

* “Says the person who basically eats ketchup with a spoon.” Mike retorts and Angela scoffs

* “It’s America’s best condiment for a reason Mike.” Angela snaps back

* “I think we’re getting off track, I say Mike buys us all french fries to make up for all the times he hogged the joint basket” Jessica’s teasing but Mike takes it seriously

* “What so I’m a French fry monster now?”

* “Yes” Both Angela and Jessica respond in unison without looking up from their menu cards

* “What do you think Bella?” You’re surprised that Jessica’s the one asking. You get the feeling she’s not very happy about Mike’s crush on Bella.

* “I think Mike should buy everyone their own basket since he has such a bad history with sharing.”

* “You traitor!” Mike mocks hurt and you all laugh.

* You look at Bella through the corner of your eye, maybe it’s just the lighting but she looks pinker when she’s laughing.

* She looks happy as she starts contributing to the conversation.

* “I will say the pie here is really good, I wouldn’t share even if someone paid me to.”

* “Omg yes, the cheery icebox pie is out of this world” Jessica responds

* “I’m partial to chess pie” Mike pipes in and Angela laughs

* “You guys are crazy, the fruit custard they make is the best”

* You grin as your four new friends argue about the superior dessert, watching Bella laugh beside you.

* Welcome to team human Bella

Tags: @moonlights27 @thebluetint @the100thtwilight @awesomebooklover17 @oneofthepotterheads @smileygirl08 @imdoingathingmom @iconicgguk @yrawn @alyciaswhore @little-horror-show @wicked-watering-can @lazydreamers @xxxmuxxx @puritanicalhypocrite

#twilight #twilight saga #twilight imagine #twilight headcanon #twilight reader insert #edward cullen imagine #edward cullen x reader #edward cullen #edward and bella #bella swan x reader #Bella x reader #bella swan #Jessica Stanley x reader #mike newton #angela weber #midnight sun #superhero--imagines

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enhyupn · 3 years

Text

the perfect date! chapter one

masterlist | next

a series in which enhypen’s 02s competitive side shines through when trying to get your attention. the only solution to end this tiring rivalry? three dates with each of them in the course of three weeks.

paring: 02s x gn!reader

word count: 3k

genre: fluff, angst, high school!au, someone’s gonna end up heartbroken

warnings: swearing, violence is mentioned

ask to be on taglist, updates are irregular

a/n i literally had to dig this out of my drafts so i don’t even know myself what i’ve written PLSSS

taglist: @dchannie17 @simluvbot @jaeyuni @neocrush

falling in love at the age of twelve wasn’t what you were expecting while learning basic algebra. being heartbroken at the age of thirteen while reciting shakespeare was also not as expected. the cause of both of these unforgettable moments? park jongseong, or otherwise known as jay to almost everyone around you. your first love was something that stuck with you, even in the present. he was your seat mate in three of your classes and the person you would ask for the homework right before it’s due date. it was a one sided crush, it was quite obvious to you. he was popular, sporty and incredibly talkative, you were one out of maybe twenty people that had a huge bulging crush on him.

at age fourteen you vowed to forget about him, the previous year he had moved to america to improve his english abilities which had put you in a miserable mood for almost all of your middle school life. who else was supposed to give you the math homework? how were you supposed to feel excited to go to school when jay wasn’t going to be there? your barely-a-teen mindset made you think you were never going to get over him.

flashing forward to freshmen year of high school, new school, new class and a clean slate to basically pretend you were a completely different person. no more being dependent on other people! no more trying to do anything to get friends! no more—

“hi, my name’s jake” oh boy.

and that’s how jake sim entered your life. it was his australian accent peaking through his words as he flashed you an energetic smile that pulled you in. you could of fallen for him at that instance, well you could of fallen for him throughout your years of friendship but the returning thought of your first love entirely stopped that process. jake sim was like a breath of fresh air, he was everywhere you went and had your back for everything.

you were his best friend and you thought of him like one too, you two were practically glued to one another. of course you had side comments, gossip that the two of you were dating or one of you two had an one sided crush (the latter part of that sentence we aren’t going to get that much into) but it didn’t make you two feel awkward or anything like that. with jake you almost forgot about jay (algebra and shakespeare being the things that stimulates the memory of him). although it wasn’t like jake was a rebound, you think yourself you’ve felt happier when you were around jake. i mean jake’s definitely popular, rivalling jay’s popularity in middle school even. if you asked anyone in your school who they’ve had a crush on, jake sim is number one on that list. he had some type of air around him, always being incredibly positive, he quite literally radiated the colour yellow. maybe you had a type when it came to people you associated with.

the close second on that list was maybe the complete opposite to jake in terms of their public image to the school. park sunghoon was the class president in your class. academically gifted, popular with the female population in your school, a talented figure skater, a stereotypical cold and distant beauty, there were a lot of layers to sunghoon. you personally had never really talked to him, the only time being when he had dropped papers on the ground in the hallways, maybe a few months ago. you helped him pick them up before carrying them with him to the teacher’s staff room. even then, you two had barely shared any words during that whole incident besides a “thank you”.

still, you could say you respected sunghoon. i mean who could have the energy to do his whole schedule besides him? you definitely could not. plus the way he was one of the most popular bachelors added to his busy schedule. the most recent valentine’s day was the proof as well as it was record breaking in your terms of your classes history with the day. having jake and sunghoon meant there were a lot of people trying to confess their feelings entering your classroom. last year, jake was stopped twenty three times the whole day, beating out sunghoon’s twenty sudden confessions. this year, there a sudden decline in jake’s confessions, a whopping three people only expressing their feelings desperately to him as he politely declined. sunghoon’s number rose by about ten people, expected but still a little shocking.

it wasn’t like the two of them cared about it, the only thing they did care about though was being polite when rejecting people. you couldn’t really sympathise with jake or sunghoon whenever they had to prepare yet another rejection, the only confession you’ve received being from yoon hyunsuk that was quite awkward considering he was a family friend and you saw him almost every week after you had rejected him.

anyways, returning to present time where you were doing your regular daily routine for a weekday. it always went waking up way too early, under eating breakfast in hopes to get the bus on time, meeting jake on the bus, walking to class with him and trying to not fall asleep in the middle of math class. it started off completely normal, maybe a little too normal.

“did you hear?” jake whispered in your ear. the two of you were supposed to individually practice questions but the chattery side of jake honestly got the best of him at moments like these.

“what is it?” you reply back quietly.

“a transfer student is coming in after lunch ends, one from america” now that really got your attention. you turn to him with your eyes wide in surprise, curiosity taking over you completely as you ignore the difficult question in front of you.

“did you see them?” jake couldn’t help but feel the sudden heat rush to his face as your sparkling eyes met his. “how do you even know this?”.

“ryujin told me plus, i saw a bit of him at the principal’s office” you looked behind him, trying to get a glimpse of the mentioned girl. the concentrated look on her face as she tried to solve the maths problem was evidence to you that she hadn’t heard her name being mentioned by jake. “said something about bleached hair that was definitely going to get the teachers mad”.

“now you got me excited” your small smile only sending butterflies to his stomach. you turn your head back down to face the still blank piece of paper, deciding that it was about time you started on that question.

“y’know he kinda looked familiar” the questioning tone in jake’s voice caught your attention, turning back to him in confusion.

“what do you mean?” a pout formed on your face. more confusion took over your face when you realised jake looked away from you quite fast, his ears turning a slight shade of pink.

“i— i don’t know” he silently cursed himself for letting himself fall deeper into his one sided crush from only small moments. his sudden black mind caused him to forget what he was meant to say to you, only leaving you puzzled by his words.

jake sitting opposite to you as you ate your unsettlingly warm sandwich, was really the only thing really going on during lunch that say. although weirdly enough, park sunghoon’s glances and staring was a new addition to your lunch time. even without directly looking at him, you could feel his eyes as they dug into the back of your head.

“you know you can relax, sunghoon’s not gonna bite you” jake commented on your stiffness. you bit your lip anxiously when you realised how loud he was being, not wanting sunghoon to know he was currently the topic of conversation between the two of you.

“if you speak any louder he might hear you” you angrily whispered to his face as you rolled your eyes. the boy chuckled before placing a small ball of rice into his mouth.

“he won’t idiot” jake tells you with maybe little too much confidence. you noticed that sunghoon had looked away from you abruptly, his cheeks visibly reddening as he faced his desk. “oh”.

“why are you like this?” you expressed you concerns. jake shrugged his shoulders, not understanding where you were coming from. “i should be excited for the new student, not trying to tame you from embarrassing our class president!”, your voice lowering at the last few words.

“i think he wants to tell you something”

“i think i want you to shut up” you muttered and you took another bite from your sandwich, wincing at the warm tomato and soggy lettuce that came into contact with your mouth.

jake was about to fire back but was only stopped by your phone violently vibrating on the table. your eyes widen in embarrassment as you frantically tried to get to it. you turn your phone to look at the screen, a notification telling you someone was calling you. jake tried to take a peek at your phone, only abandoning the plan when he saw you glare at him.

“hey yeojin” a small smile forming on your lips when reciting your middle school friend’s name. im yeojin was your best friend up until high school when her parents made her go to an all girls boarding school instead of your co-ed high school. she hated it so much when it was initially brought up by them but from the looks of it now, she’s actually enjoying herself. yeojin was the only person, excluding jake, that ever knew about your crush on jay. jake found out when the two of you were looking through old middle school pictures, you pointed at jay in a class photo and that’s the story on how jake knows about jay’s existence. “what’s up?”.

“i’m not supposed to be on my phone” her voice was frantic. you knew from her many, many letters that her school was strict when it came to personal phones. she was only allowed it everyday for thirty minutes during lunch on the weekdays, three hours on the weekends. “but, i have some exciting news for you”.

“what is it?” jake could see your eyes glisten in curiosity. he chuckled to himself as he placed his chin in his palm, his full attention being placed onto you.

“guess”

“i can’t believe you’re doing this right now” you squinted in annoyance at her playfully attitude.

“i was kidding” yeojin’s contagious laugh caught up to you, making it look like you forgot about her joke on you. “but you know how you’re old instagram account got deleted because of—”

“don’t say it” you interrupted through gritted teeth. jake laughed loudly at your reaction, catching the attention of sunghoon yet again.

“anyways, and you basically lost all of our middle school classes handles?”

“yes, i remember it all a little too well” embarrassment laced through your words as you remembered the never-to-be-mentioned-again memory.

“anyways so jay...” your eyes lit up at the mention of his name, an unsettling feeling in jake’s stomach appearing due to your expression. “he’s back!”.

“he’s back?” you stood up from your seat in surprise. your class looked at you in concern before you apologised as you embarrassing lowered yourself down to your seat. “you’re not kidding me right?”.

“why would i lie?” you could feel yeojin’s eyes rolling through the phone. “oh shit, patrol’s back. gotta go, i’ll send a letter soon—”

jake watched as you ended the call staying seated with your eyes widened, unable to process what had happen. you couldn’t pinpoint any of the emotions you were feeling, were you happy? anxious? scared? you had no clue. you bite your lip, hoping the action can help your blank mind.

“so—”

“is this 3-A?” a loud voice entering the class interrupted jake, causing the boy to sigh out of frustration.

you turned your head in the direction. you felt yourself shake in more shock when you realised who the person at the entrance was, and from the way they looked back at you, he realised who you were to. you abruptly looked away, facing the window on your left with your face burning up as you held up a hand to cover your face.

jake’s puzzled expression took over his face before putting the pieces together. his heart was beating at such a fast rate that he felt breathless, he didn’t think he was at all ready to see his crush’s first love entering their own classroom.

he watched as sunghoon did his usual mannerly class president thing, standing up from his seat all professional and kind before making his way to jay with an open hand for him to shake.

“hello, you’re earlier than expected” sunghoon smiled, unsure if it was genuine or not due to the fact the boy in front of him didn’t even acknowledge his presence. he dropped his hand before letting out a quiet irritated sigh, trying to figure out what he had his eyes on.

even with sunghoon’s growing annoyed expression, jay’s eyes were still trained on you. it was like you were frozen, no muscle in your body allowed you to move as you blankly stared outside the window. the only thing moving was your eyes shutting completely as you felt footsteps coming your way, instantly knowing who it belonged to.

“y/n” a cheery voice made it’s way to jay’s words.

sunghoon raised an eyebrow at the two of you, not entirely following this whole situation. how did he know you? why did you seem so embarrassed? bashful even? and why was jake staring at jay like he just killed his family?

“j-jay hey, y-you’re back” you finally turned your head, however still unable to look at him in the eyes. jay chuckled at the way you tripped over your words, memories of the two of you from middle school playing in his head. he glanced down beside you, the empty seat almost begging him to sit there.

you almost feel yourself jump into your seat when you noticed jay was pulling back the chair beside you as he prepared himself to sit down. at this point jake’s face was visibly red, glaring at jay for reasons that cannot be exactly explained and sunghoon’s feet had even brought him all the way to your desk meaning he had a full view of this whole mess. you four had the whole classes attention, even with some whispering to each other about you.

“it’s been a while” jay smiled through his words as he sat down, his position facing you as you struggled to make eye contact. you could feel yourself sweating from the unbearable heat coming from your cheeks, your head still blank unable to think properly.

“you two know each other?” sunghoon asked curiously as he placed his hand on his hip. you don’t know why but you cursed sunghoon silently in your head for asking that question, the thought of jay telling him you were only his friend pained you.

“yeah, middle school classmates” jay finally acknowledged the boy’s presence. sunghoon nodded in reply as he scanned your expression, unable to understand how you were feeling. “i had— i can’t say it it’s too embarrassing actually” jay rubbed his neck embarrassingly before turning away in embarrassment, only for his eyes to meet jakes.

“no, carry on” jake’s few words came out as a little passive aggressive but didn’t particularly offend jay in any way. it was quite obvious to everyone but you that jake was being a little jealous, possessive maybe from the way he glared at jay and sunghoon, who frankly didn’t really do anything up until this point.

“oh okay...” jay didn’t know why he felt nervous. maybe it was cause jake couldn’t keep his glare off of him or he was about to regret his next few words. “i had the biggest crush on y/n”.

now that got your attention. with wide eyes your eyes made contact with his at last, his cheeks were tinted pink and he had a bashful smile spread across his lips. you could even see jake in the corner of your eyes closing his mouth as he tried to recover from the shock. while sunghoon, who was right behind jay, looked like he wasn’t completely over the shocking revelation.

“i—” you felt speechless. this was the first time you’ve heard anything about this, you didn’t even think you were ever going to hear those words. you once again tried to open your mouth in an attempt to reply but was just met with nothing.

“they didn’t like me back though” jay continued. you looked at him like he was crazy, your eyebrows raised with confusion taking over your face.

“but i—”

“y/n can we talk....” jake’s voice interrupting your soon to be confession as he stared at you with a serious expression. you turned to him, once again not fully processing this whole situation. “...outside the classroom?”.

you glanced back to jay who looked visibly irritated, rolling his eyes as he ran his fingers through his hair. sunghoon just stood behind him, staring at jake with what looked to be some sort of fear. letting out a sigh, you stood up from your seat as you looked jake in the eyes.

“let’s go outside jake” you were slightly thankful for his sudden request due to you not wanting to be stuck in that suffocating environment. you watched as he stood up from his seat, his expression changing into quite an anxious one.

the curiosity didn’t leave you as you followed jake out of the classroom, you even heard your classmates whisper to each other as you passed them. you didn’t even want to look back to see the face of jay, you had ended your long awaited reunion short just to go talk to your best friend by the staircase. jake glanced around the area to make sure nobody was there to listen to what he had to say.

“thanks for getting me out of there—”

“i like you” those three words almost made you faint on the spot.

was it time to wake up now?

#enhypen scenarios #enhypen imagines #enhypen fluff #enhypen x reader #enhypen headcanons #enhypen timestamps #enhypen drabbles #enhypen fanfiction #kpop imagines #kpop scenarios #kpop fluff

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adonis-koo · 3 years

Text

to the moon and back

Summary: Sometimes the distance in relationships really does make a strain and sometimes...it can really make quite the experience, at least in your experience with your boyfriend who only lives half way across the world...

Pairing: Jungkook/Reader, theres like,,,implied Taehyung/Reader if you really squint

Genre: angst, smut,

Word Count: 6.4k

Tags: long distance relationship that I accidentally projected way too much of my own personal experience into 😃, Jungkook just really loves MC, skype sex, I am sorry, mutual masturbation, a little praise kink, Jungkook says baby in korean a lot and once again I am sorry, sex toys, a lil overstim, nothing too crazy tbh, dirty talk, dom!jungkook and sub!MC 🤑

Note: I missed ldr!Jungkook and MC which is based off this sorta imagine I did for them! So I cured it by writing a lil bit about them!! :)

“Hey Jungkook…”

The said man in question suddenly perked up from where he had been looking down, half his hair tied up and he was rubbing his eyes, he looked tired these days and sometimes you couldn’t help but feel bad. Long distance relationships weren’t always what they were cracked up to be and it wasn’t like you were intentionally looking for a ball and chain at the time...

But well, it was a long night, you were slightly drunk and in a long dry spell so you thought, what the hell? When you signed up for a sub/dom dating website. Again, your intentions weren’t to actually date someone, you were just slightly drunk and horny, and waking up the morning after your phone had been blown up by your now boyfriend. It was innocent at first, you both had a good laugh (to somewhat of your embarrassment) about the whole drunk thing and you were just curious to get to know him.

It was from there you had learned he lived halfway across the planet in South Korea and not only this but when you began exchanging photos he was by far the most beautiful man you had ever seen. One thing led to another and eventually you both decided to make it official.

You were used to this of course, you had never actually met him in person and sometimes you felt a little apprehensive to do so, you knew it would hurt Jungkook severely if he ever found out but still...sometimes it felt like you just didn’t know him as much as you wanted too.

Time zones were a literal hell, by the time you woke up he was getting ready to sleep and most the time texts weren’t sent until the next day, video calls were rare and usually had to wait until the weekend. It sucked.

Jungkook, if anything, had been trying to convince you to at least fly out to see him, he even offered to pay for your ticket as he was- ahem- apparently in the chain of business for a really well known exports corporation and was a supervisor so he lived very well off in comparison to yourself, who was still in college and buried in debt with little to no money left outside of the expenses of living.

But again, you were just...nervous...flying by yourself, to a country you had never been too, to meet a man you had never met...You knew realistically everything would be fine, Jungkook was exactly who he said he was, he wasn’t some criminal that was going to murder you and sell your body parts on the black market but…! You just wanted to be safe! To be careful even if that would never happen.

“Hm?” Jungkook hummed, it was a late saturday night for him but he always stayed up just for you, just to be able to talk to you, to see your face, even if you went hours not talking to one another while he worked and you studied. He told you he just enjoyed looking over at his monitor and seeing you.

Currently you had been curled up on your pillow scrolling on your phone and occasionally admiring your boyfriend’s side profile and strands of hair long hair that fell from his face, “Why did you learn English?”

Jungkook raised his brow a little before suddenly laughing causing you to shift a little in embarrassment feeling as though you had said something dumb, “Well,” He rasped a little, he had been brushing up on his english ever since you started dating but he was also a little self conscious of his accent despite you saying several times over how much you adored it, “English is mandatory to learn in school but I learned extensively due to my family traveling a lot for business and work. I once spent a whole year in New York when my father was employed overseas, that was actually how I became so fluent, classes are fine but experience always teaches best in my opinion....” Jungkook’s lips curled into a smile as he hummed once more, “Which means your studies in Korean would be easier if you visited…”

Flustered you rolled onto your back as you pressed your pillow against your face, “Jungkook…!” You whined wiggling in your best as you heard his laugh filter through the speaker, “I need you know I really need to stay and study for my finals, it makes up for over forty percent of my grade!”

“Not even for winter break?” Jungkook let his lips jut into a pout as he laid his chin against his hand, “Jagi I have a bed that’s way too big to sleep in all by myself, are you gonna make me downgrade?” He sighed dramatically as he fell back in his computer chair pulling his hair tie out as his hair fell at his cheeks as he began to fix it.

You ignored the heat immediately flushing between your legs at the deep rasp of his voice, “My mom’s expecting me to come home to visit for the holidays Koo…” You frowned as you peeped out from behind your pillow to find the massive pout on your boyfriend's face as he sunk in his seat.

“Sometimes I think you’re just embarrassed to tell people we’re in a relationship,” Jungkook mumbled as he sat up in his seat, running his fingers through his hair as he sulked, obviously trying not to let your rejection make him upset but even through a screen you could always read his moods, sometimes too easily.

“That is not true!” Your voice was immediately serious as you sat up, fixing your laptop as you set it in front of you, Jungkook was once more slouched in his seat, his hand resting on his cheek as he looked away from the screen, “That is not true Jungkook, I-...” You sighed, “I can’t just drop all my responsibilities here to visit you, you know this, you know hard I’ve been studying for finals and how much my family has been wanting to see me…”

Jungkook didn’t reply for a moment but you could’ve sworn you heard something akin to a scoff escape his lips, “But you still haven’t told your family...have you?”

“I haven’t had the chance…” You were immediately trying to defend your reasoning when deep down you felt bad that well...he was right...to a degree, but what were you supposed to tell you family? You met your boyfriend on an offshoot website based around sexual play and not only this but he lived half way around the world.

“You talk to your mom on the phone weekly Y/n,” The longer Jungkook looked away from the screen the more upset he was getting and you could tell and yet you felt so helpless, it wasn’t like you could just reach over and grab his face, or simply hug him and apologize. Once again, you found yourself at a loss of what to do or say.

It wasn’t that you wished you hadn’t met Jungkook, you’d never in your life change that night, but sometimes you wished things weren’t so complicated and that your fears wouldn’t get the best of you. And you did speak some truth, even if you weren’t nervous to meet Jungkook in person, it didn’t change the fact that you wouldn’t be able to go now with finals approaching and your family expecting you for the holidays.

“I’m just,” Jungkook inhaled sharply before letting out a sigh, “I just feel so frustrated sometimes, I want to be with you, not part time, half time, or only at night. I want to wake up with you in my arms every single day. And I can’t do that, hell I can’t even get a phone call during the week let alone a text at the same time of day if I’m lucky. We just had a work party where everyone brought their partners and I couldn’t bring mine because she lives in America.”

His upset was beginning to make you upset, it felt like your gut was being grinded and it wrenched in an unpleasant feeling as you spoke, “Look I’m sorry okay? I can’t help it that this is where I live, I understand you want to be with me, you don’t think I want the same thing?” You put your hand on your chest, trying to keep your voice level as you swallowed harshly, “But right now, I can’t help it Jungkook. The holidays just aren’t a good time right now…”

“Then what was the excuse during the end of the summer when you weren’t even in school and your parents didn’t want to see you?” Jungkook replied, his jaw clenched and hurt in his eyes as he questioned you, “Or was it still because you were sick in the middle of july?”

“I just met you!” You cried out now beginning to feel genuinely hurt at your boyfriend questioning the sincerity of your feelings, “I wasn’t going to fly out to Korea to meet someone I had only been talking to for three weeks! Jungkook this is-”

“I’m not embarrassed to be with you! God, that is literally the last thing on my mind right now! I’m embarrassed at the way we met, I’m embarrassed that I- I somehow have to explain to my family that my boyfriend lives in South Korea and that I’ve never met him and somehow explain to them that you aren’t some serial rapist or human trafficker out to sell my kidney! Because that’s exactly what I’m going to hear! And I’m sorry I just haven’t been ready to deal with that!” You couldn’t even stop the tears from flowing down your face as you pressed your hands to your eyes, “It’s easy for you to talk about us because you’re an adult who lives debt free by himself in his own apartment with your own secure job and you don’t have to answer or deal with anyone, even your own parents! That’s not how it is for me Jungkook.”

Your head was lowered as you tried to muffle your sobs that was the only thing that filled the loud silence that filtered the air, running your hands through your hair as you took a breath. You could hear a sigh on the other side before Jungkook spoke, “Y/n…”

“You know what,” You sniffled as you straightened up, “I’m not in the mood to talk anymore,”

“Y/n! No! Jagi listen-”

“No I’m done!” You argued back as you wiped your face with the sleeve of your hoody, “I don’t want to talk to you right now. Goodnight.” You clicked the end call button before closing down your laptop. Sitting now, staring at your distinct reflection on the black screen before bursting into a new set of tears.

Your phone’s ringtone was immediately set off as you sobbed, picking it up as you harshly punched the decline call button before it quickly popped back up on the screen only for you to press it even more vehemently. Your phone lit up several times being flooded with messages from Jungkook trying to convince you to talk to him but you immediately turned off your phone as you collapsed back against your bed, weeping against your pillow as you tried to ignore the pure hurt that filtered your veins despite it being justified.

God you shouldn’t have even said any of that to Jungkook! Really it was your fault you hadn’t seen him, you had made excuses all because you were just scared. He was probably going to break up with you now...Squeezing your pillow tight you closed your eyes as you muffled your sobs.

“Girl why are you staring at your phone?” Lisa sighed in exasperation, “Don’t tell me…Oh shit…” She sighed as she watched your eyes begin to pitfully water, “What was it this time?”

“I’m a horrible person be-because I can’t just fucking suck it up and tell my family about my boyfriend and- and I can’t just go visit him!” You were already wiping your eyes despite not even crying yet and you refused to ruin your mascara in a public store. The bookstore was quiet as ever and the barista who worked the cafe was still sorting magazines out on the rack not even paying attention to you both but still you had to keep up your ideals or else you’d be crying all the time.

“You are not a horrible person oh my god!” Lisa raised her brows before scoffing, she pointed a long acrylic nail at you as she spoke, “That boy needs to calm his hormones, you are strapped for the rest of the holidays. Y/n! Come on, seriously you need to draw some boundaries with him! Just be honest and it’s going to save you both a lot of trouble.”

You sunk in your seat as your lips began to tremble making Lisa sigh, “How many messages did he send this time?”

“Twenty four.” You mumbled.

“Jesus Christ.” Lisa groaned as she pressed her hand against her forehead, her bangs which had been melded together with hairspray not even moving an inch, “What even started this fight!?”

Lisa was not only your closest friend but most times she was also your voice of reason which you knew was most times right but still you couldn’t help but feel embarrassed as you twirled your straw that poked through the lid of your iced coffee, “Well it was innocent at first, I just asked him why he learned English when he was younger and it translated into him saying experience taught him best which meant going to Korea would help me with my own language studies.”

“Why can’t you just be honest with him!? Seriously! Y/n!” She gave you her premium disappointed look as you whined, kicking your feet as you covered your hands over your face knowing she was right, but!

“That would literally crush him!” You replied feeling defeated as you slumped in your seat once more, sighing as sadness filled you, “It feels like…” You poked your tongue into your cheek as you exhaled in frustration, “No matter how hard I try, I just always end up hurting him. Jungkook would be so hurt if he knew my main reason for not wanting to see him.”

Lisa raised her brows as she scoffed, “No he would not! If he’s so desperate to jump on your pussy he’ll come to America and not only meet you but he’ll be meeting me as well the first time. This relationship is a two way street Y/n-”

“He has a whole team he’s managing Lisa, he’s told me he’d visit if he could schedule the time off but-”

“All I hear is an excuse,” Lisa clacked her tongue, “Fair is fair, you’re just being cautious as anyone should be when they’re talking to someone over the internet,” She curved a brow before snorting as she sipped her drink, “Now listen, do I think he’s a kidnapper that’s gonna kill you? No. Do I think he’s a fuckboy that just really wants to smash you? Maybe, it’s your relationship. Do what you want but regardless of whether your reasoning is legit he should respect it regardless.”

You deflated as you sighed, scrolling through his messages where he had profusely apologized several times and went on to explain that he just really wanted to be with you and never meant to dismiss your feelings on the matter. You hadn’t replied yet which made you feel even worse but truthfully, you just really wanted to talk to see him tonight on a video call and talk things over.

“Anyways, it’s time to boss up bitch,” Lisa pulled out the three textbooks from her bag before dropping them on the table as she offered a smile, “We got finals to prep for, we’re in the two week countdown so we need to cram as much as possible.”

Sighing you glanced down at your phone one last time before turning it off knowing the temptation to look over Jungkook’s messages would be too tempting. Putting your phone away you pulled out your notebook along with your own textbooks as you nodded, “You’re right, it’ll at least take my mind off of it…”

You could only hope.

You had spent the last ten minutes trying to gas yourself up, Jungkook had stopped texting around lunch time having obviously given up and giving you space as this wasn’t the first time something like this had happened and he knew if he just gave you time you’d eventually reach out to him.

Like right now, except you felt severely embarrassed for your actions this morning and you knew you could have handled things in a better and more mature way then you had, regardless you were struggling to even send a text at the moment let alone video call him...Checking the clock on your phone you sighed, it was already 1pm in Seoul....

Jungkook if anything was probably on his computer sulking while playing video games as he usually did on his weekends off when he wasn’t talking to you. Sucking in a breath you knew you needed to talk to him now because if you didn’t you’d have to go the whole week with stale texts that never went over well and you weren’t working with much to begin with, you didn’t want to make it worse. Sighing, you sat down on your bed as you began to type.

[10:25]

‘I’m sorry I haven’t replied to any of your messages :( can you video right now?’

You chewed on your lip anxiety immediately spiking in your head as you wondered if you came across too much like a victim...Or maybe you should’ve just not mentioned the not replying to his messages and just asked if-

You nearly jumped out of your skin at the sound of the skype call sounding with Jungkook’s name under it, grabbing your chest you collapsed onto the bed as you made yourself comfortable, shying away from the camera as you grabbed your pillow in insecurity before accepting the call.

“I really am sorry Jagi,” You couldn’t even open your mouth before Jungkook’s worried expression showed up on your laptop, the hoodie covering his head and just as you expected his puppy like eyes were glossed and filled with sadness, “I- I didn’t realize how much stress you were under and I shouldn’t have been so careless. This is the only time during the week that I get to see you and I really don’t want to argue…”

You curled up against your pillow as you mumbled, “I should be the one apologizing, I know how much it means to you for us to be able to see each other in person and I need to make the time for us to be able to do that it’s just…” You had meant to tell him the truth but- “I just have a lot going on right now but I didn’t mean to take that out on you, I know you just want us to be together...”

“Oh jagiya,” Jungkook sighed, longing filled his face and his fingers twitched a little as they ran through his hair as if wishing he could just hold you close to him, “It’s okay, I’m just glad you wanted to talk. I didn’t want the whole week to drag by without being able to talk to you, you know you always make my day better…”

And just like that your chest blossomed with warmth as you curled up, hiding the smile that began to creep on your lips as you squeezed your pillow, “Not as much as you make my day. Especially when you send those tease pictures for me right before I need to go to bed.” You would never get enough of that addictive feeling of talking to Jungkook, his smile was always infectious.

And just like that you watch, just like every other time, in amazement at the way Jungkook’s personality switches like a light, the innocent sweet smile that was once on his lips is suddenly twisted into a cocky smirk and he leans back his chair, his long hair is slightly messy but just enough to make him look truly wicked, “Oh? Is that right gongjunim? I thought you’d appreciate it?”

Said photo in question was sent thursday night when you were prepping for bed and Jungkook had very obviously just gotten out of the shower in the mirror selfie he had sent that displayed the chiseled abdomen and broad chest and not to mention the….ahem package he was sporting beneath the thin towel that he had purposely clutched with his free hand.

Yeah...that nearly destroyed your right hand.

“Well I did…” You immediately coiled up, no matter how many times this happens with your boyfriend- which is nearly every weekend, you always end up getting shy despite your thighs furiously pressing together and wetness building up in your panties, “Maybe a little too much…”

Jungkook pressed his tongue into his cheek as his smirk widened, just his stare made you press your face into the pillow as you heard his chuckle, “What? What did you do?”

The fact that he skipped to the golden question made you whine as you kicked your feet, you could hear another laugh from him as you curled up once more, “You know…” You mumbled, feeling your face burn as you pressed it against the pillow.

“No baby I don’t.” Jungkook pouted but his voice rasped and something about saying baby in english with that accent of his had your fingers twitching as he puffed a breath of air in cockiness as he hummed, “Why don’t you tell me hm?”

Shifting against the bed you shook your head, “You know what I’m talking about…”

“Do I?” Jungkook challenged as he raised a brow, his beginning to clench as he slipped into his dominant headspace, tucking his tongue into his cheek as he asked, “If you can’t use your words would you rather show me? Be a good girl and show me, yeah?”

Your words were muffled as you replied, “I had help…” Your face felt like it was practically on fire as you rubbed your legs together as you heard him laugh, “Then be a good girl and go get it jagiya, I’ll still be here.” You gave Jungkook a good laugh as you nearly scrambled out of bed to get your bullet vibrator off it’s charger before diving back on the bed making your laptop bounce as you sat up right.

Jungkook meanwhile had pulled off his sweatshirt and repositioned his camera to expose his lower body, the familiar sight of his plump cherry lips exposed in that forever tainted smirk as he made himself comfortable in his chair, his thighs spreading apart and the indent in his sweats showing off proudly, “Good girl kitty, now I want you to take off your clothes, all of it.”

You wiggled in your comfy sweatshirt feeling a little shy as you began to shed your clothes, “The bra too baby,” Jungkook coaxed as he licked his lips, his cock tightening and becoming harder at the sight of your flustered, shy expression as you unhooked your bra, there was nothing more this man wanted then to suckle on your nipples that immediately hardened against the chilled air of the room.

Jungkook’s hand found its way to his bulge as he palmed himself through his grey sweats, “Panties too baby, I know you’re shy but you need to be a good girl and take them off. And remember your words.” He added with a low growl.

“...Yes sir.” You mumbled, feeling chilly and exposed to nothing more then the camera on your laptop and Jungkook of course before you pulled off the panties you wore, arousal sticking to the fabric that stringed before you tossed them aside, your eyes unable to stay off his hand that kept stroking his bulge.

“Good girl,” His lips twitched into a sadistic smile, “Now spread your legs jagiya and show me what you did to that photo I sent you, every little detail baby.” You whined as you looked away from the camera, “Jagiya…” Jungkook’s voice deepened a little in warning, “Are you gonna make me get out the controller?”

Outwardly you’d completely deny that but inwardly....The idea nearly had you frothing out the mouth, but reluctantly you did as he asked, the chilled air nipping at your exposed warm wet folds had your levels of arousal that much higher and you could hear a soft verbal moan from Jungkook as he squeezed his hand over his cock, “Shibal,” He muttered a few other words in korean that you could only half make out before he spoke once more, “You’re so fucking wet baby. Play with yourself, don’t make me wait.”

Tenderly you slipped your hand between your thighs, flinching a little at the cold that seeped from your fingers that met in opposition to the heat radiating off your cunt, arousal met your fingertips as you dragged them up you slit before rubbing slow circles around your clit, your lips parting a little at the idea of it being his fingers doing this to you.

Jungkook let out a little scoffed laugh, licking his lips as he pulled down his sweats just enough to free his throbbing cock, a sight you’d never fully get used too and had your mouth watering at just the sight. He was much thicker then he was long but he certainly wasn’t short, the vein on the underside of his cock displayed and you could even see his tip beginning to weep as it became red, “How bad do you wish those were my fingers playing with that little clit baby? Put those fingers inside your cunt baby,lay back and use your toy to make yourself feel good for me.

Situating your laptop before you laidback, opening your legs once more as you began to transition to your subspace as you closed your eyes, imagining his fingers dragging up your inner thighs.

Letting your eyes open you whined at the sight of lube slipping from his cock as his hand slowly pumped his shaft, his lips parted at the sight of one finger slipping inside your cunt before pulling out and adding a second finger. You could just imagine those long thick fingers filling you up while fitting up against your g-spot.

Fumbling with your vibrator you turned it on, switching the setting to a low pattern before carefully placing it on your aching bud. You had anticipated your reaction just as you did everytime and yet every time you still jolted, your walls tightly squeezing around your fingers as a whined squeak escaped your lips.

“Fuck princess that’s it,” Jungkook edged you on, his tongue in his cheek as his hand squeezed around his cock before he used his free hand to grab his own toy, the fleshlight that nearly always turned you into a mess, “Bet that little hole can hardly fit your own fingers let alone my big fat cock, right baby? Yeah?”

Your thighs were twitching as pleasure was rapidly buzzing against your clit and your walls kept squeezing around your fingers as you desperately tried to reach to your g-spot in need for an orgarsm to make up for all the anxiety and stress you had been under the whole day, “Yes! Yes sir! Ah- Mmph need you! Fuck, please! Sir.” You whimpered as your hips jolted to fuck back against your fingers.

Jungkook pushes the opening of the flashlight over his tip as he let out a soft moan, his hips fluidly began thrusting to the point your walls were so tight you could hardly move your fingers just at the idea of his cock forcing its way inside you, you just knew this mans stroke game was good and proved it every fucking time he took out that toy.

Watching his cock disappear with every thrust inside his toy as his lips parted a little wider this time, “You want this baby? You wish this was your pussy I’m fucking nice and deep?”

Your body was too excited for all of his dirty talk as you squirmed shifting the buzzing vibrator to the sweet spot of your clit as you squeaked, trying to keep yourself from being too loud as your roommate was home, “Want it! Want it so fucking bad! Please sir! Sir!”

You were embarrassingly horny and this made worked you up every single time, your hips we’re stumbled and your walls were rapidly clenching in excitement as his thick cock rocking it’s way in and out of the toy that you could just imagine was your pussy he was fucking nice and slow, making you feel his nice fat cock with every killer slow thrust.

“Oh Jagiya,” Jungkook moaned out, “Don’t tell me my kitten is already close?” He chuckled as he watched the way your body withered the way it always did when you were close, his eyes feasting on the way your pussy was stretched so delicately against your small fingers and the way your thighs clenched and your feet kicked, “Do you need to cum so soon?”

“Please! Please! Sir! I- I don’t think I can-“ Your thighs clamped together as your lips fell open, unable to even wait for his blessing as your orgasm ripped through your body, your toes curling as little whimpers escaped you, you could hear a long moan from Jungkook as you liddedly watched his hips stumble against his flesh light, hand running through his hair while he fumbled something in Korean.

“Baby fuuck,” Jungkook’s voice lowered as he moaned, “Cum again princess, cum for me baby I wanna hear you make those noises again for me. Keep those little fingers stuffed inside yourself.” Jungkook’s hips kept stuttering against his toy, his cock throbbing desperate as his moans became breathy at the sight of you obeying him. You were always such a good girl.

Your fingers were aching but your desire to watch him come undone was even greater as you began pushing your fingers back against your g-spot once more, feathery whines escaping you at the feeling of pain beginning to mix with pleasure at the consistent thrum of the vibrator against your clit.

“Ah! S-sir…!” You whimpered quietly as your walls suddenly clamped around your fingers once more, “I- ah! I don’t think I can…!”

“Yes you can,” Jungkook growled his hips bucking up into his toys faster his cock throbbing and squeezing in pleasure at the sight of your arousal slipping from your soaked cunt and the sight of your tits bouncing at the way your body kept squirming, he could only imagine what it would be like fucking you tied up and left to his mercy, “And you will,” He snapped with command, “You’re gonna be a good girl and cum for me again princess. I wasn’t fucking asking.”

Your legs immediately twitched and your breath hitched as you cried out, your back arching at the way your body listened to him so easily on command, your walls tightening around your fingers rapidly and pleasure seered into your clit as the orgasm roughly filled your body, “Ah Jungkook! Fuck, fuck, fuck…! Fuck! Ooh!” Moans escaped you louder then you intended as your hips desperately fucked into your fingers to ride the powerful orgasm you experienced.

Jungkook moaned softly as his hips bucked one last time into his toy before cum was filling it up at the idea of milking all of himself in your little warm cunt, letting his hips swivel as he milked every last drop of cum from his cock as he moaned before relaxing back in his chair.

Chuckling a little at watching your lower body scramble at your vibrator continuing to drill against your over stimulated clit as you struggled to turn it off, “Take your fingers out baby, I wanna see them.” Jungkook licked his lips as you obeyed him, pulling your fingers from your cunt to reveal the thick layer of arousal and cum on them nearly making Jungkook’s mouth water with the desire to lick every drop off your fingers, this man couldn’t even describe what he’d do to go down on you.

“Ah fuck, jagiya,” Jungkook laughed, a little flustered at the way you sat up, looking directly into the camera before putting your fingers in your mouth, licking off the salty and somewhat musky taste of your arousal which in your opinion wasn’t that great and Jungkook would never accept your opinion on the matter, “You’re gonna make me hard all over again.” He whined as he carefully pulled the toy off his cock, feeling the white substance already rolling down his softening shaft to reveal the mess he had made.

You giggled a little, feeling shy once more as you stood up with wobbling legs, “I don’t have to help with that.” You called out, grabbing your favorite sweatshirt to pull over your body. It was your favorite because...Well because Jungkook had sent it to you and because it was big on him it was massive on you.

You absolutely adored it, coming back in view you collapsed onto your bed as you curled up, Jungkook had just finished cleaning himself up, fixing his camera for you to see the beautiful radiant smile and eyes light up that was your boyfriend. He always had that dreamy look in his eyes while looking at you everytime you finished having Skype sex and everytime it always made you shy as you grabbed your pillow and curled up.

“You’re always so fucking good baby,” He groaned as he ran a hand through his hair, his smile permanently on his face as he stared in adoration at your curled up figure that was practically buried in his sweatshirt, “Mmm you were such a good girl too, your eyes were rolling to the back of your head when I told you to cum again.”

He had a boyish laugh at the way you curled up, “Stoop! You know I was already overstimulated, you better hope my roommate didn’t hear anything…!” You covered your face in embarrassment at the realization you were a little loud.

Jungkook’s face stiffened a little at the mention of your roommate before he tried to play it off with a small laugh, “Yeah well, what’s he gonna do about it anyways? You were just being my good little girl jagiya.” You covered your face in semi embarrassment. You knew Jungkook was redirecting the conversation back to verbal aftercare because you knew he didn’t like the fact that your roommate was a guy who was not only your age but also very attractive.

It wasn’t like Taehyung was ever interested in you, but you had mentioned to Jungkook when you first started talking that you used to have a crush on him. You felt as though some days that still lingered in Jungkook’s mind despite the fact that you didn’t even look at Taehyung twice anymore.

Especially since you and Jungkook became an item, however you also hadn’t told Jungkook that Taehyung had been...Well you weren’t sure what he was doing to be honest outside a few innuendos and winks. It mainly weirded you out as he had never paid any attention to you but regardless. This wasn’t about your roommate, this was about your amazing, handsome boyfriend who somehow managed to make you cum twice just by the sound of his voice, not everything could do that.

“You make it difficult to try and disobey.” You mumbled as a smile tugged in your lips, closing your eyes at the idea of his arms wrapped tight around you and his forehead pressed against your own, you could almost feel his warm breath against your face and his lips pressing against your forehead.

“Mmm id like to see you try,” Jungkook laughed as he leaned back his seat, letting out a content sigh as he spoke, “I’d make you wear those vibrating panties the whole day after making you overestimate yourself and I’d make sure to wake up every hour just to hold that button for three minutes straight.”

“You’re so mean!” You whines as you fluttered your feet before crawling under your covers as you yawned, “You’re already planning a punishment when I haven’t even done anything wrong.”

“I’m not!” Jungkook laughed as he objected, moving his hair from his face, “I’m just telling you what would’ve happened if you weren’t obedient. I mean, that’s not always a bad thing baby.” He sent a wink your way that immediately made your cheeks warm as you pressed your face against the blanket with a giggle.

“I can’t do that over a video call…! Maybe if you were here in my bed I’d be a little more defiant.” You always had a hard time trying to flirt confidently but Jungkook always ate it up every single time you threw him a crumb.

“Jagiya if you can’t be defiant over a call what makes you think you’d manage it when I’m between your legs sucking the soul out of your pussy?” Jungkook was immediately cackling at the way you shoved your face into your pillow with a whine, “Exactly baby, you can’t even look at me right now.” He cooed out.

“Well maybe I’m just a little more bold in person.” You challenged, peeping out from behind your pillow making Jungkook chuckle as he shook his head, his eyes filled with adoration as he leaned back in his seat.

“Well sweetheart I’ll just have to see for myself one day huh?” Jungkook’s smile was so beautiful, it was arguably one of your favorite features as he spoke, “You know I love you to the moon and back jagiya.”

“Well I love you love you to the stars and beyond,” You whispered back as you hugged your pillow close, closing your eyes sleepily as you smiled….One day...Hopefully you’d overcome your anxiety soon to make the one day become soon, you weren’t sure how much longer you could stand being apart from the one person who would never stop making your day.

#bts #jungkook #jeon jungkook #jungkook x reader #jungkook x y/n #jungkook smut #jungkook x reader smut #ldr!jungkook

303 notes · View notes

generous1ty · 3 years

Note

could you write for nagito x reader with depression? thank you so much <3

aww, hey anno, i hope you're doing ok!

personally, these kind of requests are ones that i love to do! as someone who struggles with very similar symptoms, it's something i can relate to very well. i hope that this can bring comfort to you, even a little bit. :)

thank you for requesting, lots of love. <3

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LIVING

genre: comfort/fluff warnings: gn!reader, takes place during the SDR2 killing game, overall depression symptoms/depressive thoughts, we’re mean <3 well more like easily irritable and aggrivated-- also the plot is everywhere i’m sorry this was literally off the top of my head in the time span of i-don’t-know-how-many-days and i really don’t like it but-, there’s no established relationship either since it feels weird for there to be romantic stuff in a killing game to me?? but like,,,, pining works so well,, SORRY FOR RANTING IN THE WARNINGS OMG but i swear there is fluff in this i promise word count: 1.93k

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the sight of the plain, white ceiling was a familiar one to you.

the feeling of nothingness, the fear of being empty, the overwhelming thoughts that would constantly wrack your brain, and the ones who were screaming at you to get up.

yet, no matter how cruelly they screamed at you, your body would not respond-- it was painful, it hurt to move.

you don’t quite remember the last time you were out of your cottage-- you don’t remember if you had went out of your cottage at all during this past week. you also didn’t know how many times a certain somebody would come to visit you while you laid in your bed, still staring at the ceiling in a sour disinterest.

even though you’d rather be watching a movie or doing a simple hobby, you knew not even that would produce any results for you.

it was just you, and the sight of the plain, white ceiling that was painfully familiar to your eyes.

knock, knock, knock!

the gentle taps on the door--from which you assumed were knocks--had made you sigh. you weren’t up for visitors- you weren’t really in the mood to talk in general, but you had known who was at the door.

you pushed your voice out of your throat, rolling over to your side with a groan.

“...come in.”

although with your face turned to the wall, and although he had been greeted with the sight of your back, he would speak in a soft tone. you could hear the soft noises of his feet carrying his frail body as they got closer to the bed.

they stopped, and the shuffling of his clothes had processed in your head before something was placed on to the floor. you assumed he was crouching right now, and that if you had forcefully rolled onto the opposite side of your body, you would be at eye level with him, staring into light green eyes that glowed with... hope. you think.

“good evening, [Y/n],” he greeted, not expecting much of a response back, “I brought you dinner and, like before, I won’t leave unless you wish for me to.”

your head tilted slightly left, your gaze being met with a boy with messy, white hair that seemed too fluffy to be real, a soft smile on his already too soft features, and understanding eyes that pulled you into a tight embrace.

yes, this wasn’t the first time Nagito Komaeda had barged into your room. --well, to say he barged in was an overstatement.

the first time he had entered, he hadn’t even entered. he stood out on your doorstep, a few feet away from you as he delivered food to you on a small tray with several plates on the doormat in front of your door. the setting sun and hues of gold glowing in his eyes shone brightly on his pale skin, giving him and almost majestic, angelic look to his thin frame.

“an ultimate needs their nutrition to fully function properly. though, i’m sure you don’t need someone like me telling you that-- and you probably would rather go back to doing what you were doing other than talking to a nobody like me --but i couldn’t help but notice you weren’t with everyone today, so i brought you a tray of food in case you got hungry, that’s if you’d take such an offer from me,”

he faltered for a second, but you stayed silent as to let him keep going. his friendly grin as he spoke had taken off some of the gravity of his words, and his welcoming tone had made you feel a bit more relaxed.

“of course, you can just tell me if you want me to leave and not talk to me at all, if you’d rather do so- that’s completely understandable. please don’t feel obligated to take things from disgusting garbage like myself either. if i were you, wouldn’t want to get my hands dirty as well.”

your lack of response was what he took as his cue to leave, feet shuffling against the planked floor in a backwards manner--to get out of your sights, mainly. he had opened his mouth to apologize, but you had done that first-

“sorry,” you muttered. you were quiet, but Nagito could hear despite the challenge in volume, “i didn’t mean to trouble you, really.”

you bent down and took the tray in your hands, handing it back to him in a subtle manner. he was.. stunned? shocked? he couldn’t express his words like he normally did- it was an odd feeling, really. to be speechless.

“thank you, but...” you had trouble looking him in the eye. you wanted to do everything but look him in the eye, “i really don’t deserve this, and i don’t have much of an appetite anyway, so your efforts would be wasted. i’m sorry.”

“don’t apologize--” his voice was a bit abrupt, bringing your actions to a harsh halt, “you have nothing to apologize for- if anything, i’m sorry for bothering you!”

his voice, despite it’s volume, was kind and understanding. it was soft and brought a sense of security to you-- like you could feel... safe with him.

“i was hoping you’d keep it, since you didn’t show up this morning either. i was thinking in the case you hadn’t eaten, so i brought a few more plates than what everyone else ate.” he gently pushed the tray back to you with a smile, and your gaze had went down to stare at his long--and beautiful--fingers, “i think you should take it-”

he closed his eyes as he smiled, “unless you don’t want to?”

your gaze had stayed on his hand, and once he noticed your gaze was directed at them he had taken it back. he avoided your gaze and held his fingers in the other hand, “ah, apologies- they’re not very pretty and if you’d like another tray i can go back and bring one to you in gloves since my disgusting fingers had dirtied them.”

for the first time in this conversation, you had looked up. although the effort was minimal, Nagito could feel your effort. his chest tighten with your movements.

“i think they’re beautiful.” his grip tightened on his hands, “thank you.”

you slowly closed the door with a small smile.

his heart was pounding against his chest, he could feel it. it was loud inside his ears and prominent in his ribcage. he hoped you didn’t hear it- he hoped he didn’t embarrass himself during that interaction. he hoped that it would be okay to keep doing this, over and over again, to make sure you were okay.

yeah, to make sure you were okay.

“how many times have you done this, Nagito? you know it’s useless, i barely eat,” you huffed, chest dropping rapidly from the exhale.

“if you want an exact number, this is the 19th time i’ve come into your cottage to deliver you food, in short 2 weeks and 5 days.” he answered, gently tapping your shoulder so you got the memo to turn around, “and i’m just making sure you’re doing alright, since no one else will unless asked. i’m pretty sure they think you’re plotting their deaths.” he let out a breathy chuckle.

“let them believe what they want.” you had slowly gotten up, groaning and letting little exhales escape your nose before sitting up properly on the bed under you. it was uncomfortable not having anything to lean on. “who or what they villainize is not my problem. they’re just idiots. all of them.”

“now, now, i don’t think that’s a nice thing to say.” he placed the tray on the bed, looking at you as if to ask for permission to sit on the mattress with you. you sighed and changed your position on to the wall, making room for the man to sit. he smiled. “after all, they are ultimates like you.”

“that doesn’t have to do with anything i said.”

“they harbor just as much hope as you do, so their thinking isn’t flawed at all. and neither is yours, no matter how much i disagree with it. since, i don’t really have a say in interfering with what you think.”

you nodded slowly, leaning your head on the wall and looking outside. luckily, your cottage wasn’t one of the ones stuck in between houses-- whether Monomi or Monokuma made that intentional or not, you didn’t really care.

it was beautiful out, as the stars made their way into the sky, painting it bright yet somber colors. it gave you a nostalgic feeling that lit up in your chest and refused to go out. with your silence came Nagito’s as well, staring out the window with you.

“don’t you think this whole thing is useless?” you asked, blinking mindlessly, “making us kill each other and stuff, creating motives for us to do so and having class trials to eliminate each other even more. there’s no point in doing any of it-- being suspicious of each other and villainizing people.”

“i mean, if i’m going to die anyway, there’s no point to leaving this cottage. or making friends. or talking to you or anyone else.”

your gaze had wandered into his, in which were staring at you in mezmerized adoration. your eyes held pity, sorrow, sadness.

“you don’t have to keep doing this, seriously. you don’t have to come visit me, or give me food i won’t eat, or talk to me, or listen to me. i’m just going to die anyway.”

“i just want to.”

his words startled you. the words that left his pretty, pink lips had given your heart a small surprise-- but to say you hated it would be a lie.

after all, all of Nagito’s actions were of his own accord.

it’s not like you ever forced him to-- nor did he feel obligated to, either. maybe at first, but he always came back-- no matter how many times you reassured him when he watched you eat in your cottage to make sure you had something for the next day.

he always came back. not because he felt like he had to, but because he wanted to. he wanted to check up on you, he wanted to see you.

but to Nagito, he just wanted you.

maybe it was your mild vulnerability towards him that had drawn him in at first, but to him, he just wanted the entirety of... you. he wanted to get to know you, to shelter you, to hold you. of course, those would never happen-- not in a lifetime, but he was grateful he could even be this close to you.

so to hear you say those words-- those words of “it doesn’t matter” or “i’ll die anyway”--his heart became heavy because of those words.

i mean, he had also been there before, after all.

with the many cuts and turns his luck cycle would take, it would eventually spiral into a deep depression. he didn’t know what caused yours, but he did hope he could alleviate some of it. that was what Ultimates and Hope’s Peak had done for him, after all.

he didn’t know if he was mixing up the feelings of romantic need with the need to help you mentally, but he just wanted to be. he wanted to be, with you. he wanted to live, with you.

“we all die someday,” his words felt heavy on your chest, “but i want to live with you.”

and your chest felt a little flutter in it that evening.

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writteninkat · 3 years

Text

xii - overwhelmed

word count - 2,220

"if i love you was a promise, would you break it if you're honest?"

index

You walk towards the classroom with your palms sweating and your heart about to beat right out of your chest. You had just confessed to Katsuki thinking he also felt the same, but all he replied was a lousy 'you don't even know me'.

You furrow your brows, clenching your palms into fists in irritation. How am I so stupid? I came to Japan to prove myself and to that dumb father of mine that I can be a powerful hero! And yet here I am being swept off track by some lousy high school crush!

"Careful- if you stare any harder you're gonna melt holes through the walls." A tired and very familiar voice calls out feom behind you. You turn around, anger still clouding your head as your eyes fall on a violet-haired boy.

"Careful- if you don't do anything about your lack of sleep anytime soon you're gonna collapse." You spat back; suddenly everything around you vexes you. You send a mental message to everyone in school; today you're hot-headed, your patience is as thin as a hair strand and taking out your anger through physical violence seems like an amazing idea right about now.

"Jokes on you, I've been like this my whole life and I've never collapsed." He smirks, causing you to raise a brow. "Okay maybe I never collapsed from my lack of sleep."

"Look what the hell do you want?"

"Well- thought you looked pretty upset." He holds up two pastel yellow-colored papers. "And I just so happen to have two free ice cream passes for that new ice cream place right beside the campus." He takes a look at his watch, "We still have an hour and thirty minutes till the bell rings. What do you say?"

"And that idiot just says 'you barely even know me'" You wave your hands up, making a dumb face as well as a dumb voice to match, "like hello! I know I barely know you and that's why I feel so upset and conflicted right now! You get what I mean???" You huff back on your seat, shoving the small pink translucent teaspoon in your mouth.

Shinsou nods his head, eyes on his ice cream as he shoves a few scoops in his mouth. "Mmm- this banana flavor tastes amazing. You should try it." He offers his cup to you, making you frown.

"You're such a jerk! I thought you brought me here to let me vent out my anger." You frown, your eyebrows knitting together as you place your cup on the table, leaning back on your seat as you crossed your arms.

"I did. I listened as you vented out your anger to me and we're having ice cream but I never said we were going to talk about the situation." He points out, annoyingly unbothered expression resting on his face as he continues eating his own ice cream.

You look at him in irritation and silence for a few moments, trying to calm yourself before taking your little teaspoon and scooping a bit from his own cup. You shove the scoop inside your mouth, pouting. "The banana tastes amazing." You huff, expression still angry.

Shinsou chuckles lightly, the small smile actually lighting up his usually dark features. "It is, isn't it?" You've only ever met one person with a so-called 'contagious smile' and he was the funny boy you met at the park one day.

Ethan will have to share his spot in my list for 'contagious smiles'. You thought to yourself, letting a smile break your frown as you look down at your ice cream.

"Have you seen the new conjuring movie? It's pretty cool, a solid six out of ten." He shrugs. You shake your head, "I can't watch scary movies. I won't be able to sleep especially now that I live alone."

He raises a brow at you, "Oh come on. We can watch it together through video chat or something. I really wanna see you piss yourself while watching it." He chuckles, causing you to squint your eyes at him. "Is that a challenge?" You point your spoon accusingly at him.

"What if it is? You gonna back out? Loser?" He pushes jokingly, mirroring your squinted eyes. You bring your hand on the table in a fist, "Oh it's on."

Shinso walks you to your classroom just five minutes before the bell is about to ring. "How can I contact you?" He asks, doing the thing with his hand behind his nape as he looks away. "Here." You tug at his hand, writing down your discord account with a marker. "Call me after the sun sets. I'll be home by then."

He waves you good bye and you step in, almost completely forgetting about why you were annoyed so early in the morning. Your eyes fall on the blond boy, still looking angry as usual. His eyes meet yours for a fraction of a second before your looking towards your seat.

As you sit down, the bell rings and in comes Aizawa, tired as ever. "Today, you will all be choosing your hero names. This has a lot to do with the Pro-Hero draft picks and because you are only first years, any offers can be taken back before you graduate." He explains, pointing at a chart where Todoroki's, Katsuki's and your names are written at the top with thousands of heroes wanting to recruit you.

"You will all spend one week interning with the pro heroes you choose or those who chose you, depending on if you have multiple offers or just one." Aizawa continues to talk about the importance of hero names before Midnight walks in the classroom.

The class begins to cheer in excitement as they all are given boards and markers for their names. The cheering and yelling dies down in a few minutes but the excitement doesn't. You smile, feeling your heart throb at the innocent looks in your classmates' faces.

Each of you all are being called up to present your hero names and as your turn slowly comes closer, your palms begin to sweat and that feeling of not being able to stand properly hits you.

"L/n Y/n. It's your turn, come on up sweetie." Midnight calls for you, curling her fingers a few times. You stand from your seat, walking towards the front, keeping your eyes forward and looking anywhere but Katsuki's eyes.

You flip your board around. "I chose the name Tempest. It means a violent windy storm." Midnight claps her hands, "I love it! Basically telling the villains not to mess with the storm." She cheers, allowing you to walk back to your seat.

"So! Have you guys chosen an agency yet?" Mina asks, shoveling food in her mouth as Kirishima and Sero follow suit. You shrug your shoulders, "I'm having a difficult time choosing between Hawks' agency or Endeavor's agency. I want to work on my speed but then again, Endeavor's the number two. It'd be a waste to throw this chance away."

"And yet," Denki points his fork at you, "It's also a waste to throw away the chance of working with Hawks. I heard he's the youngest pro right now who has his own agency and is in the top ten."

As you were about to scold the blond for talking with his mouth full, Katsuki marches towards the table, setting his tray down before sitting down beside Kirishima. You look at the empty space beside you and your mood immediately turns sour.

Wow. Sure, he has the right to feel uncomfortable with my sudden confession but to not actually have some type of closure? You sigh, not bothering to finish your food before standing up. You slide your tray to Denki, earning a cheery mouthful 'thanks!' from him before you walk away.

You walk out the classroom upset, tired and hungry. Your mind races back to the tuna sandwhiches the cafe sold and your mouth immediately begins to water.

"Hey idiot."

All your food fantasies disappear the moment his gruff yet very warm and relaxing voice calls out to you. To make sure you weren't about to embarrass yourself, you look in front of you, searching for someone else only to be greeted by an empty hallway.

Slowly, you turn around, pressing your lips together as you look at Katsuki with the most nonchalant look you could pull, no matter how much you wanted to scowl at him.

"What's up?" You ask, mentally slapping yourself. What's up? What's up??? Who the fuck do you think you are to him, Kirishima??

He looks awaw, walking towards you. "They have new matcha cookies today. I checked before I got here."

You stand there, staring at him for a second, two seconds, five- ten- "Dumbass. Yo. Can you hear me?" Katsuki snaps his fingers in front of you, gaining your attention as he snaps you out of your daze- literally. "Well?"

As much as you want to say yes, accept his offer and just live a happy life, you didn't want to live a confusing one where you get hurt in the end. "I don't see why you have to do this, honestly." You look to your right, looking out the windows.

"We hang out, I feel like you're treating me differently than the others, I feel like I'm special to you, I recognize my feelings, and although I feel conflicted and upset I still confess my feelings to you." You grip onto your bag, "And you respond to me by what- telling me I barely know you?"

You look back at him, the corners of your lips pulled downwards sightly. "Katsuki I- I got the message, okay? Don't do whatever this is to me because from my point of view, you're leading me on cause you can't voice out or even figure out your own feelings." You motion your arms between the two of you. "If you liked hanging out with me, I'm sorry but I gotta keep some distance between the two of us before I go confessing to you again like an idiot."

You stand there, eyes dropped to the floor in silence.

Say something, you idiot! Fucking say something to me! Tell me how you feel- it doesn't matter if it'll hurt me, just say something!

"I'm sorry."

You look up at him, confused. His brows are knitted together in dejection as his shoulders sag momentarily.

You feel your eyes prickle with tears as you nod, pressing your lips together. "Okay." You click your tongue, turning away as you walked from the unnervingly quiet boy.

As you reach your apartment, the sun has already set, you're tired, your cheeks are stained and are still being stained with tears and your phone is blaring.

You answer it without another thought, Shinsou's tired and relaxed voice giving you a soft 'hey'. You can hold it in much longer as you break down into sobs.

"Hey, hey, what's wrong? Talk to me, Y/n." He sounds genuinely concerned. You sob for a few moments, letting out all the emotion you've pent up inside you as you walked back to your apartment.

"I-I just-"

Another call interrupts the two of you, making you furrow your brows. "Hold on-" You sob, your eyes scanning down your screen to see your mom calling you. You put your call with Shinsou on hold, answering your mom.

"Hey mom!" You cheer, trying to act as gleeful as possible. "Hey baby! So I heard you have a boyfriend, your aunt Miwa sent me a picture of the two of you in the paintball place? I just thought maybe you wanted to know about that boy's abrasive and violent past?"

He's not your boyfriend.

"What- you looked into him?" You yell.

"Well I had to! It's my first time my baby has a boyfriend. Anyway, I don't mean to be that mom but I don't think he's a good fit for you, honey. He's bullied countless students in middle school and after observing how he acted in the sports festival, I don't think that boy changed at all." Your mother does sound truly concerned for you but everything seemed to be too much for you today.

Before you can even think of the sentences you want to say, you hear a knock on your door. You sigh, pacing towards it as you pull it open, brows furrowing in anger at the sight of your father in front of you.

"Y/n I just want a second chance-"

You yell.

You yell out your frustrations, your sadness, your hesrtsches, everything. Every single emotion you felt today just came pouring out as you yelled from the top of your lungs.

Your body falls to the floor as your limbs begin feeling like jell-o and your head begins to spin. You hear your father ordering his guards around frantically, but his words are all muffled and unclear. You begin seeing double- seeing two of your father really isn't helping right now.

"Hey, Y/n, baby keep your eyes open for me. I'll bring you to the hospital just-"

"Can all of you just shut the fuck up for a moment?" You whisper weakly before darkness swallows you up once again.

It's cold. It's dark. You're alone.

You're always alone.

#bakugou fanfiction #bakugou katuski x reader #bakugou x y/n #bakugou katsuki #bakugou x you #mha bakugou #bakugou bios #bakugou imagine #bakugou fluff #mha fanfiction #mha fluff #bnha fluff #bnha fanfiction #boku no hero fanfic #boku no hero fluff #my hero fanfic #my hero fluff #my hero academia fanfiction #my hero academia fluff

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shepherds-of-haven · 4 years

Note

How would the romances with the RO's be in a college!AU? And how would the romance start?

Hmm I don’t know necessarily what they’d be like without having to write the college!AU myself lol, it sort of would depend on how the story itself went! As for how they start...

Blade: classic. Blade and MC bump into each other on campus when they’re both preoccupied with something--literally bump. Books go spilling everywhere. They bend down to pick them up. Look up and BAM. Blade has a crush. But then MC has to hurry away because they’re in a rush until next semester. They have a class together! But Blade is too shy to talk to MC so MC thinks he’s forgotten her/doesn’t recognize her. They have more classes together and with each shared class, he plucks up the courage to talk to her after she drops a pencil and he picks it up (now their desks are actually next to each other). They start hanging out under the guise of being study partners for all their shared classes.

Trouble: he’s playing a game of toss the football or frisbee golf or whatever in the quad and either he or his friend nails MC in the head with a projectile. Trouble comes jogging over and profusely apologizes. MC slyly or jokingly suggests he buy them dinner to make up for giving them a concussion and he readily agrees. That’s their first date!

Tallys: she’s growing plants in the student lab as part of her thesis and is frustrated that one of her plants is struggling to grow. She goes outside to smoke and starts talking to herself out loud in frustration. “The conditions are exactly the same. Why would one ____ specimen weaken while the others thrived?” MC is also outside (either smoking as well or just tending to other plants) and says, “It sounds like being on the end of the row is hampering its roots. Maybe because they grow westward?” Tallys whirls around and is like ‘who the fuck are you??’ all suspicious this is a rival student who’s trying to sabotage her thesis. But MC just likes plants! They talk a bit more and Tallys reluctantly agrees to try re-potting the weak specimen in a bigger container (idk I don’t know plants, you get the picture). A week later, the plant is thriving! Tallys waits in the same spot outside to see if MC will show up, not smoking this time. She crosses her arms and says, “You were right about the plant. I’ll buy you dinner as thanks for saving my thesis.” MC accepts but replies they don’t need the thanks. Tallys smirks. “Consider it a bribe, then. I bet I’ll need you for future consultations.”

Shery: she’s working in the coffee shop and MC comes by every once in a while and makes conversation, pairing the coffee with a winning smile. Shery falls head over heels, but surprisingly doesn’t get nervous or stammers when MC comes in. In fact, she looks forward to it! But their interactions are always a few minutes every few days, until one day Briony is behind the counter too and does something sly like suggest they look cute together or writes Shery’s phone number on a napkin for MC or something. MC gets it, smiles at Shery, and says, “Can I take you out for a coffee? Somewhere that’s... not here, I guess.” Briony: “You can do it here!” Shery: “Yes!”

Riel: he’s playing piano in one of the practice rooms and, as he’s leaving, he sees MC leaning on the wall opposite of the practice room door. Riel asks MC if they’re waiting for anyone, as he’d reserved the room for several hours, and MC answers, “No, I just heard you playing and it was so beautiful that I got lost in the music. It’s Scarlatti, right?” Riel gets a huge brain-boner and gives MC his number under the guise of offering ‘free piano lessons’ if MC wants to learn. MC surprises him by actually showing up!

Chase: Chase gets a starring role in the play he secretly auditioned for, but he’s super nervous because he’s never acted in anything before and doesn’t want to fuck it up for the other play members. MC, an actor in a minor role, hears him fretting over the phone one night to Trouble or someone and offers to help him rehearse and ease his anxiety. They start meeting up to read lines together, MC coaching him, and the chemistry between them steadily builds. Chase realizes during rehearsal--when he has to kiss his star opposite--that it’s really MC he’d like to be kissing, and right after that he takes them out on a date and confesses his feelings!

Red: MC and Red are assigned to be lab partners together in a science class, and they start flirting from the get-go, talking about the CHEMISTRY between them as they measure stuff in beakers. They exchange numbers for class and start meeting at Red’s dorm/townhouse for study sessions. One day they give up early and put on a movie, but neither of them are really concentrating on the movie. Before even halfway they’re making out on the couch!

Ayla: Ayla gets drunk at a party and meets MC. She’s so plastered she’s dancing all up on MC and shouting things like “you’re pretty! I like you! I’m gonna marry you someday!” At the end of the night she loses Briony and Lavinet, so MC offers to walk her home to make sure she gets there safely. Ayla is either so drunk MC gives her a piggyback ride or they have to hold hands the whole way. (Ayla gets lost and doesn’t remember where she lives several times.) When they get to her doorstep she grabs MC and kisses them, but they gently ease away and see her safely indoors. In the morning Ayla wants to die from the embarrassment and contemplates jumping from the window. Instead she rides on her Vespa to her favorite breakfast diner for some hangover cures and what do you know! MC works at that restaurant part-time and reveals they thought they recognized her as a regular but weren’t sure... but the Vespa seals it. Still humiliated, Ayla buys them breakfast on their break but quickly realizes she wants to spend more time with them when the meal is over, so she asks for their number!

Briony: Briony is training at her MMA gym and hitting a punching bag pretty hard, venting out her frustrations for the day. MC, who also trains at the gym, comes over and asks if she’d like a sparring partner instead of a bag; Briony laughs and says, “Only if you’re okay with getting hit.” “Wouldn’t have come over if I wasn’t,” MC quips. They spar, and the electricity and flirtation between them is pretty obvious. Briony is grinning--she hasn’t fought anyone like this for a while--but then she glances up and thinks she sees a face watching her in the gym’s front window. Her mood immediately deflates, and MC notices. They notice that she seems nervous or anxious, so they offer to walk her out to her car. Briony shakes her head and asks if they’d like to grab a milkshake or dinner at this diner down the road instead; she needs to take her mind off things. MC agrees and soon enough, Briony’s laughing and happy again. They have such a good time that they exchange numbers and agree to make it a routine: sparring and then eating together!

Lavinet: Lavinet’s in this higher-level class--I don’t know, say it’s like... fashion design, or pre-law or something. At the end of the semester, the professor chooses a handful of students to go with her to Paris for a study abroad trip/internship. Lavinet’s pretty assured that she’ll get one of the slots because her father is a good friend of the professor. But then MC shows up and starts beating her in class: answering all the questions first or correctly, getting just one point above her on tests, etc. It drives Lavinet crazy, and they become rivals. Lavinet regularly snubs him and gives him the cold shoulder, feeling competitive. MC gives it right back. But then they find out a third person is planning on cheating in order to get that internship slot, and MC and Lavinet vow to beat them the traditional way. Putting aside their differences in the face of a common enemy, Lavinet and MC become allies and study buddies. Eventually Lavinet deigns to give MC the opportunity to ask her out, at the end of the semester when they find out that they’re the two who have gotten the internship. The entire time she insisted she hated MC’s guts, but everyone else in her life saw through it lol. Maybe their first date is in Paris!

#Shepherds of Haven #college AU #modern AU #AU #college #university #romance options #romance #anon

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horansqueen · 3 years

Text

Stuck With You - Chapter 32

Chapter 32: If You Don’t Know

🡪chapter 1 🡪chapter 2 🡪chapter 3 🡪chapter 4 🡪chapter 5 🡪chapter 6 🡪chapter 7 🡪chapter 8 🡪chapter 9 🡪chapter 10 🡪chapter 11 🡪chapter 12 🡪chapter 13 🡪chapter 14 🡪chapter 15 🡪chapter 16 🡪chapter 17 🡪chapter 18 🡪chapter 19 🡪chapter 20 🡪chapter 21 🡪chapter 22 🡪chapter 23 🡪chapter 24 🡪chapter 25 🡪chapter 26 🡪chapter 27 🡪chapter 28 🡪chapter 29 🡪chapter 30 🡪chapter 31

College Enemies To Lovers AU

characters // masterlist // instagrams // mood board

Tonight we're fading fast I just wanna make this last If I could say the things I want to say, I'd find a way to make you stay I'd never let you get away Get you in all the games we play

So go ahead, rip my heart out, Show me what love's all about Go ahead, rip my heart out That's what love's all about

I want you to want me this way, And I need you to need me to stay If you say that you don't feel a thing If you don't know, let me go, let me go, let me go, let me go If you don't know then just let me go

Let's forget the past I swear we'll make this last 'Cause I remember the taste of your skin tonight And the way that you looked, you had those eyes I remember the way I felt inside And the name of the songs that made you cry You would scream, we would fight, you would call me crazy I would laugh, you were mad but you'd always kiss me And the shirt that I had that you always borrowed When I woke, it was gone There was no tomorrow

click here to be on the update list

(check the characters page, i updated it with all the characters!)

NIALL

It was extremely hurtful to push her away. In fact, it was horrible, even worse than when I did it in the first few weeks after we met, mostly because now, I loved her, and I knew she loved me too. When she told Abby off, I was a bit surprised. I knew they wouldn't be friends but I didn't think Devon would actually have the guts to say these things in front of everyone but if I had to be honest with myself, I liked it. I did it to her ex boyfriend, she did it to my ex girlfriend... To me, it just showed that we cared about each other and didn't want to other to get hurt again. I also felt like it proved the feelings we had for each other because I could pretend the opposite, but there was also a tiny bit of jealousy in the way we told each other's exes off.

I knew Abby and although I didn't like the way she was acting with me, I was also aware that pushing her away would only make her try harder. She was exactly like a boomerang and even if I had no intention to give in to any of her propositions, not answering was still my best bet. I wanted to tell Devon about it but I didn't have a second alone with her and whenever I tried to talk to her, Abby would interrupt me to get my attention back.

The conversation we had alone in the dark street was rough on my heart and it kept playing over and over again in my head for the rest of the evening. I was lost in my thoughts and even felt bad for Louis when I realized Abby was trying to get his attention. She never really knew what she wanted and to me, it only proved she wanted nothing except feeling special. Perhaps, the way I loved her didn't make her feel special enough but at that point in my life, I didn't give a fuck.

I wanted to talk to Lewis but he was busy pushing Daxia between him and the wall for the rest of the night and when I was about to leave, Abby ran back to me to have an long chat about what she was doing, what she planned on doing, and how we should spend time together again. I also had to walk back to campus, too drunk to take my car, and when I got back in my room, I tried to be quiet but I quickly realized that Devon was not asleep for the simple fact that she was not snoring. She pretended to be asleep though and I decided it meant she didn't want to talk. Anyway, we were both way too fucked to have a discussion. Still, I couldn't help but stand near her for a few minutes, just watching her, as creepy as it sounded. She was obsessing me in a way I didn't understand. I had obsessed over Abby for months, yet it never felt the way it felt with Devon, and I had no idea why.

I woke up early the next morning to go get my car and when I stopped near her bed, she was snoring low. My lips curled sadly on the left when I realized she was wearing my shirt and I took off the hoodie I was wearing to lay it down on my bed, in hope that she'd see it and wear it.

I told her I wasn't going to have sex with her anymore but it was not because I didn't want to. With Abby coming back, it made me realize that perhaps, I was ready for more with Devon, and yelling to her that I loved her had an effect I didn't expect. I could see in her face that she was actually surprised, as if she didn't really think I had these feelings for her. To me it was obvious but perhaps I was not as transparent as I thought.

I spent the morning working on a new song and had to kick myself mentally to make sure I'd go to my classes in the afternoon. I had so many feelings stuck inside me that it was hard to focus on anything else, especially anything school related.

It was only near the end of the afternoon that I saw her and my heart twisted in my chest. It was crazy how much I missed her. After spending so many days together, 24/7, being away from her for almost a whole day seemed impossible but it was still happening. She was laughing with Louis but there was sadness in her eyes and they met mine, her smile fell and her lips parted. She brought her shoulders closer to her face and sent me an embarrassed smile. That's when I realized she was wearing my hoodie and it made me smile.

I didn't know why I expected Devon to be the kind of girl who would scream her feelings. Of course, she had never told me she loved me with words, but just seeing her wearing my clothes even if we were mad at each other told me she had feelings for me. Everyone has their own way to express their feelings. Of course, it's easier when it's clearly said, but words are still just words. Actions speak louder, even if they're made obliviously. She had always been secretive, almost hiding who she was and how she felt. I even wrote a damn song about it, so why was it so surprising that she couldn't tell me that she loved me? And was it selfish to want it anyway? To need it?

Louis made a quick head movement and Devon started nibbling on her bottom lip as I stood there motionless like an idiot. I was thinking I could just grab some food and go back to the music room to write some more or at least, to play something. I knew I could just go back to my room with my guitar but I couldn't seem to clear my mind when I was there, and I knew it would be worse if Devon was there and at the same time, I was desperate to spend time with her or at least, around her. She just moved her hand up as a 'hello' and I did the same. How could you feel so close to someone and at the same time, so far?

I finally sighed and walked back to my room a bit reluctantly. I worked on a school project for about an hour and finally gave up since I was not able to focus at all. I decided to take a shower before to play guitar and a few minutes after I got out, the door opened and Devon appeared. Her lips parted, she held her breath and she quickly closed her eyes, making me chuckle.

"Oh god, I'm sorry!" she let out, shutting her eyes tighter as I grabbed a towel to wrap it around my waist.

"No worries, Devie. You can open your eyes." I said, amused. "Nothing you haven't seen before."

She licked her lips and after a few seconds, her eyes fluttered open only to meet mine. She smiled shyly and I noticed some dark paint on her face. It made me realized she painted a lot with dark blue and greys these days and I was not sure it was a good thing.

"Your turn." I just told, walking past her to give her some privacy.

"You can stay!" she quickly proposed. "Nothing you haven't seen before."

I turned around and she looked nervous, nibbling again on her bottom lip. She grabbed the bottom of my hoodie that she was wearing and when she took it off, my heart skipped a beat as I realized she was wearing nothing under it. I knew it took her a lot to expose herself to me like that, and I was torn between giving her what she was clearly asking, or holding on to what I had told her not even 24 hours before. My eyes roamed on her face and down to her chest despite myself. I wanted to touch her so bad it was driving me a bit insane. I thought about sliding hands on her breasts to feel her hard nipples on my palms but just cleared my throat and blinked a few times, trying to get rid of the images in my head.

I took a step closer and her lips parted. It felt like I didn't have control on my legs anymore and I stopped in front of her, looking down in her eyes. I brought my hand up slowly to push a lock of her hair behind her ear and she raised her eyebrows in surprise.

"I... think I'll just go get dressed."

It was so pathetic. I was there in only a towel and she was standing in front of me, shirtless and literally begging me with her eyes to fuck her, but I was about to leave anyway. The less I was thinking with my head, the more I wondered why the fuck I had decided to stop having sex with her, and I knew that the longer I stayed, the harder it would be to leave. I took a step back but suddenly, she grabbed the towel around my waist and I held my breath.

"Niall!" she almost yelled before swallowing hard. "Please."

I could feel the back of her fingers against my skin as she held me by the towel. They were so close to my dick it actually made my heartbeats accelerate.

"Devie, I can't."

"Niall I fucking miss you."

I put my hand over hers, pulling it away frim me but still squeezed her fingers, my eyes never leaving hers. "I'm sorry."

It took everything in me to just turn around and leave and when I closed the door behind myself, I leaned against it and closed my eyes. My head made a light thud when it fell against the wood and I let out a few curse words under my breath.

My heart dropped in my chest when I heard her sob on the other side of the door but quickly, she started the shower and I couldn't hear anything else.

How could I tell her that if she didn't love me, I couldn't keep having sex with her because it hurt too much? How could I explain to her that I loved her so much that it made me want die thinking I'd never have a chance with her? I stayed against the door for so long what actually took me out of my thoughts was when she stopped the shower. I forced myself to walk to my bed after breathing in deeply and quickly put a pair of sweatpants on and a t-shirt. I sat in my bed just as she got out of the bathroom and I noticed she was wearing my shirt again.

"That's my hoodie." I just said blatantly, running my fingers on the strings of my guitar.

I was sitting with my back against the wall, if only to face her and be able to see her better.

"Oh yea, sorry, let me just grab a new shirt and I'll go get changed."

I frowned a bit, wondering why she'd suddenly feel the need to hide in the bathroom to change but I just licked my lips. "No it's cool you keep it." I sent her a small smile. "Looks better on you anyway."

She pressed her lips together and nodded slowly before sitting on her bed. "Thank you."

I noticed her tired eyes and how sad she seemed to be and remembered the sob I heard through the door. I didn't want to make her sad. In fact, I wanted to make her happy every single day, I just didn't know how without hurting myself in the process, and I didn't want this to be a rerun of the past relationship I had. Abby had fucked me up but at least, now, I knew what I didn't want in a relationship.

I stared at her for a few minutes in silence and she finally leaned against the wall as we faced each other. I wanted to apologize for not touching her earlier but I knew it wouldn't change anything. I could also read on her face that she had so many questions and I was not sure I had the answers. My fingers ran again in the strings as I started a song. I noticed her eyes falling on my hands and I couldn't remember the last time I felt so nervous to sing in front of someone. I was sort of used to it in my classes and I was never the shy type, but she meant so much to me and I wanted her to enjoy everything I wrote, especially if it was about her.

"Someday, it could be more than we intended And we'll be happy that we waited When it's all been said and done Oooh, and you have changed me And we both got what we wanted And looking back it's complicated But we would've happened all along

So keep this open There won't be any more hearts that are broken Hold on, hold on

Don't leave me wastin' all alone Wondering where the time has gone I know it's hard to keep keeping on Don't leave me wasted

Don't leave me wastin' by myself Let's leave emotions on the shelf I swear there ain't nobody else Don't leave me wasted Don't leave me wasted"

I stopped playing and Devon sent me a sad smile, wrapping her arms around her knees and leaning her chin on the top of them.

"It's beautiful." she expressed very low, licking her lips. "Gave me goosebumps."

I wanted her close. I wanted to ask her to come on my bed with me and take her in my arms. I wanted to press her body so hard against mine that I could imagine us melt into each other. I wanted to tell her how much I loved her and hear her say it back. Instead, I smiled slightly at her back.

"Thank you." I whispered and let out a sigh. "You know, I didn't want to hurt you."

"No, it's okay, I'm okay." she quickly replied even if we both knew it was a lie. "I mean, you don't have to want me, or have sex with me. I'm sorry I just got half-naked in front of you, it was wrong of me."

I stared at her a few seconds and put my guitar away to lean my wrists on my knees. "I was talking about last night."

Her traits softened and her lips parted. She shrugged a shoulder and glanced away before looking back at me. "You didn't hurt me. I was just pissed, in both senses. You can flirt with Abby all you want, you're right, it's none of my business."

"That's not what I said last night and you know it, Devie." I pointed out calmly,

Her face changed and she seemed to tear up and I tried to push away the urge I had to go sit next to her and take her in my arms.

"I know."

---

Two weeks and a half. That's how long it had been since I had felt Devon's lips against mine. Two weeks and a half since I had told her that I loved her. Two weeks without much interaction with her. It felt like the first few weeks she had moved in, when I desperately tried to hate her without success. I was longing for her in a way I hadn't longed for anyone in a while, if ever, but I resisted.

It was the weekend and all I wanted was to get wasted. We all ended up in a bar but after too many beers, I didn't even feel creepy to stare at her as she danced. It reminded me of that time she danced in my living room wearing only my sweatshirt and panties, right before we danced together on a slow song. Why did it feel like years ago? Why couldn't I just go to her and tell her that it was alright, that we would just keep on having sex and that I'd push all the love I have for her away if I could feel myself inside her again? I scoffed at that thought and shook my head. Why? Because it was impossible for me to ignore these feelings. They were monopolizing my whole heart and mind and there was nothing I could do about it.

I heard a loud laughter near me and I recognized Abby immediately. I had no idea who invited her but I couldn't say I was happy she was here. I got out of my thoughts when someone put an other beer in front of me and Louis finally sat down next to me before glancing a Devon and then back at me again.

"She's a stubborn girl." he let out, turning on his stool to face me. "Trust me, I tried."

"I'm just meant to fall for girls who don't want me. I'm cursed." I explained before swallowing half the beer he had just given me.

"You know she loves you." Louis sighed. "She's just scared, especially of Abby and the feelings you could still have for her."

"I don't give a fuck about Abby."

"I know, but Dev.. she's heard it before, you know? She doesn't want to go through it again. She's trying to spare her heart."

"I should have done that too." I realized, shaking my head as I still stared at her. "Should have tried hating her harder."

"Yea, that wouldn't have worked."

"Fuck, look at her."

I hated what I was seeing in front of me. Devon was with Mandy's brother and she was genuinely laughing at something he said. I could tell in the way he was looking at her that he was interested and suddenly, anger invaded my whole body and I got up quickly, my chair scratching on the floor and making a horrible sound.

"I'm gonna kill him."

Louis jumped up too, grabbing my arm and turning me around to face him. He forced me to move and it was hard for me to fight him since I was already pissed. He tapped my cheek as my back was now facing them and I groaned, moving my head away from his hand.

"Niall, calm the fuck down." Louis let out a bit too loud. "That's not how you're gonna convince her to date you!"

I was about to answer something when I felt someone grab my arm and suddenly tensed. I turned only to see Abby who was sending me a smile and I just shook my head a bit, suddenly extremely annoyed.

"No! Not you and not now!" I yelled, taking a step back.

My ex girlfriend's smile fell and she frowned a bit. I could read in her face that I had hurt her a bit but I was way too hurt myself to care at all.

"Thanks for your advices Louis, but I don't need 'em!"

I turned around and noticed Devon and Noah were already looking at me. Perhaps I had talked louder than I thought and my eyes moved from one to the other before I sighed.

"Fuck that."

I could threaten Noah all I wanted or tell him to fuck off, I knew it wouldn't change anything. It wouldn't make Devon fall in love with me or want to date me and that's all I really wanted. Anything that wouldn't bring me to this goal was counterproductive to me.

I turned around quickly and walked to the toilets, pushing on the door and leaning my hands on the counter, my eyes closed. I was going insane and I knew it felt worse because I was drunk but I couldn't help it and felt my eyes water. Perhaps, getting hammered was a bad idea and I should have known that I always ended up feeling so much when Devon was closed. I heard my phone beep a few times, telling me I had a text message, but I couldn't look at them. I felt my arms started shaking lightly and I swallowed my pain the best I could.

What was there to hope for, now? What could you do when you felt like you tried everything?

#niall horan #niall horan smut #niall horan fluff #niall horan fanfic #niall horan fan fic #niall horan fanfiction #niall horan fan fiction #niall horan story #niall horan writing #niall horan college au #niall horan au #niall horan uni au #niall horan enemies to lovers #my fanfics #swy

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kiribaku-queen · 4 years

Text

Valentine’s Day

Pairing: Bakugou x reader

Angsty, a tiny bit of humor

Word count: 2.7K

A/N: I guess you guys like angst?? It’s not as angsty and heartbreaking like how I imagined it in my head but I hope you guys enjoy this one a lot more and the new series will be out on Monday! Also, sorry that this came out a day later. I got admitted to the hospital YET AGAIN so that’s the reason why it’s late.

Summary: You absolutely hated Valentine’s Day. Nothing like a day to remind you how unattractive and unwanted you were by the entire male population. But will all that change this Valentine’s Day?

Beep. Beep. Beep.

The loud, annoying tone of your alarm startled you awake. You picked your head up with heavy eyes and immediately turned it off. Plopping back down on your pillow, you groaned.

It was that time of year.

Valentine’s Day.

The worst day of the year, where you hated being reminded of the fact that no one liked you. Time and time again, year after year after year. No one has every confessed to you. You’ve never been in a relationship. You’ve never been given chocolates on Valentine’s Day. You always felt unwanted and unloved during this time of year. And you exactly knew why.

Momo Yaoyorozu.

Your gorgeous cousin. The smartest, prettiest, most down to earth person in your entire family. Everyone fell for her. And you couldn’t blame them. She really was like an angel sent from heaven. Down to her looks and her personality, she had it all. But it didn’t help your ego that Momo sat right behind you in class. So during this time of year, her desk would be stacked with chocolates, presents, hand written love letters from all ages.

You didn’t want to say you resented her… but you did. God, you were jealous. Was it hard to just ask for at least one letter? All you needed to feel better was one person to show you affection and maybe then, you wouldn’t feel so much hate and jealousy. But no matter how many times you prayed, each year was the same. And it was going to be the same this year too.

You arrived to your class, only to see Momo already being bombarded with boys. Boys from our class, boys from the next class over. Even some of our seniors are here to shower Momo with unconditional love. And it was only the start of the day. There was more to come.

You maneuvered your way to your seat, forcing people to get out of your way. You plopped down in your seat in an annoyed way, praying that class would start soon. But all these people around Momo and them confessing their love for her, you couldn’t help but think badly of yourself. Were you really that unattractive? What did Momo have that you didn’t. You both looked similar, considering that you were both blood related. But she just drew all the attention. No matter where she went or who she met, they always fell for her.

You glanced back at her and she was all giggling and happy. Of course she would be. It would be nice to be on the other side for once. Just once. To know that someone out there might like you. Then maybe you had a chance at love. But you can only dream. What is she going to do with all that chocolate anyway? Momo was never a fan of desserts but she can’t reject anybody either.

It was already halfway through the day and you swear time couldn’t go any slower. The teacher dismissed themselves off for the next period so everyone had a few minutes to take a break. During this time, most students went to the bathroom or went to talk to their friends in other classes. That’s what Momo and a few of her friends did. Not you. You stretched your arms in your desk and just waited for next period to begin. You were about to lay your head down on your desk when another student made his way up to you. A male student. With chocolates in hand. Instantly, your heart skipped a beat.

He was walking right at you. There’s no doubt about that. And it was clear to see that he had chocolates in his hands. Was this your time? Did someone finally find you attractive enough to have feelings for you? You straightened up in your desk as the guy approached you.

“(y/n)?” he called out your name. You bit your lip in anticipation. He bows his head down and extends his arms out to hand you the chocolates. You could literally feel your whole mood being lifted off of your shoulders and happiness and joy filled your body. But before you could say or do anything, he said something that made your heart sink right back.

“Can you please give this to Momo? I couldn’t bring myself to give it to her after seeing that massive crowd this morning. But I thought if I gave it to you, maybe I have a better chance at catching her attention. So please send in a good word for me!” he begged. Ouch. That hurt like a bitch. That whole thing about you feeling happy and having this whole bad mood being lifted off your shoulders? Yeah, that came straight back down tenfold. You got your hopes up only to be crushed in the most humiliating way.

“Yeah… yeah, I can do that,” you say, snatching the box of chocolates out of his hands. Oblivious to your behavior, he beams at you, thankful that you were ‘willing’ to do this favor for him. Your cousin comes back to see yet another Valentine’s gift waiting for her.

“Some guy wanted to give you this while you were gone,” you inform her. She was looking at the gift curiously. Then she smiles with her perfect, gorgeous smile that everyone falls for.

“Thank you, (y/n)! Goodness, I don’t even know where to put this one,” she talks to herself, looking around where she could put the little guy. Her bag was already filled with gifts. Her desk had no room. There was a pile of presents at the foot of her desk and you knew that there was still more coming. And guess what? This happened several times throughout the day, in between classes. Guys would come up to you, knowing that you were Momo’s cousin, and ask you to give her their love letters and small gifts. Guess you’ll only be know as Momo’s cousin. You couldn’t turn them down, no matter how annoyed you got. You just needed to get through lunch and a few more classes until the day was over and you were free. God, how you wanted this day to end so badly.

“Just do it.”

“I will.”

“Now.”

“I’ll do it!”

“She’s walking away!”

“I SAID I’LL DO IT!” Bakugou yells at Kirishima, gripping the letter in his hands that was already crumbled by now. Bakugou was stiff in his stance. No matter how much Kirishima and Kaminari tried to push him and convince him to walk up to you, he would.not.budge.

“C’mon. You did not stay up all night writing this letter to not give it to her,” Kaminari kind of laughs at the blonde for his uncharacteristic-like behavior. Bakugou looks up at you for the hundredth time that day, watching as you gracefully walked down the hallway. He was so stunned by your beauty that he was frozen in place. And by the time he knew it, you already disappeared around the corner.

“Aaaand she’s gone… way to go,” Kirishima pat his best friend on the back. Being the hot head he is, you’d assume he would do everything with confidence and be straightforward, even if it wasn’t in a romantic way. But something about you just made him freeze. You made him completely forget about this façade he puts up around people. You do something to him and he knew it wasn’t normal. He’s never felt like this before so doing anything so… cringey was foreign to him. Plus, he’s never had to go after girls because they are always the one to come to him. He was pretty popular, even he was surprised. Why would anyone like him? But it didn’t matter because the only person he was looking at was you. Now you were gone and out of sight and now he’s frustrated that he was too chicken to just hand you this damn letter.

“Tch, maybe I won’t give it to her,” Bakugou decided to give up. Now that really wasn’t like him. Kirishima and Kaminari looked at each other and smirked. If he wasn’t going to give it to you, then they were going to give him motivation to make him want to give it to you.

“Well if you’re not going to confess to her, maybe I will. It is the perfect day for that,” Denki said aloud, emphasizing each word to get through Bakugou’s thick skull. Oh, he heard it all right. Loud and clear. And he didn’t like that one bit. Anger and irritation started to bubble inside him. So much that smoke started to appear out of his fists.

“Ha?” Bakugou questioned Denki. He wanted to make sure he was hearing correctly. Almost as if he was challenging him to say it again.

“I said, I’m going to confess to (y/n),” Denki rubbed it in his face. That was it.

“I’M GONNA FUCKING KICK YOUR ASS!” Bakugou blew up, explosions coming out of both hands. Mind you, the letter was still in his hand. He just used his quirk. He just blew up his love letter to you. The ashes of the letter fell to the floor and collected in a pile on the floor. All three just looked down in silence. Hours of hard work. Of writing then rewriting and rewriting again. Crumbled up papers that were lazily thrown at the trash can and even more burnt paper filled his floor. He spent hours overcoming his embarrassment and poured his heart and soul in this damn letter only for it to be sat in a pile of ash in front of him.

“Kaminari Denki,” Bakugou said his name, low and menacing. Denki couldn’t look up. He refused to. Bakugou looked up with murder in his eyes. “Run.” “Okay.” He whispered in a small voice and bolted down the hallway with Bakugou right on his tail.

“Wait, Bakugou!” Kirishima yelled out after the two, pulling out his phone. “I took a picture on my phone! Come back!”

The next half of the day was just like the first. Multiple guys came up to you to give Momo their presents because they were too shy. It didn’t faze you anymore. When you returned from lunch, you were the first to enter your classroom and was ready to sit back down. But a note and a small box were laying on top of your desk.

You approached it and took the letter in your hands. There was no name on it. But why was it sitting on your desk? Could it be for you? No way. There’s no way you were falling for that again. You didn’t want to raise your hopes only for them to be crushed by dudes you didn’t even know. Not worth the heartache. Although, there was a slight possibility that it could be for you. Curiosity almost got the better of you and you almost opened the letter to see if it was actually addressed to you, but then you glanced at Momo’s desk. In such a short amount of time, her desk was covered in Valentine’s Day gifts. It was so much that you couldn’t fit another thing on there.

Then it hit you. Someone probably put it on your desk because there wasn’t any more room on Momo’s. That had to be the case. Bummer. Ignoring the slight ache in your chest, you gently laid the letter at the very top of the stack, turned around in your chair and waited for class to start.

Bakugou, Kirishima and Kaminari were all peeking through the window to the classroom to see you receive the letter. Bakugou, being the embarrassed, stubborn boy that he is, couldn’t bring himself to physically give you the letter himself, so he opted to setting it on your desk. At least he was still giving it to you in some way. But as soon as you flipped the letter over, he knew he messed up.

“The name, the name! You forgot to write her name!” Kirishima panicked, smacking his forehead with the palm of his hand.

“If it wasn’t for dunce face over here then I wouldn’t have rushed and forgotten to write her name!” Bakugou blamed the blonde next to him. As if he didn’t feel like an idiot then, you put the letter on the desk behind you. You thought someone mistakenly put the letter on your desk when really, it was for you!

“Kirishima!” Bakugou nudged him and he was already on his way. Sneaking past you in a nonchalant way, he swiftly secured the letter in his hands without anyone noticing and returned to the boys. Bakugou snatched it away, his heart racing. Time for plan two.

The bell rang and you could cry of happiness. The day was finally over and you couldn’t wait to get back home. You spent the whole day secretly anticipating if someone would come up to you, but it never came. You saw it coming but you didn’t think it would affect you that bad. Typical Valentine’s Day. You walked to your locker, which was coincidentally right next to Momo’s. It wasn’t hard to spot where your locker was because of the hundreds of love letters covering her locker. Were there that many people at your school that admired only one person?

You raised a brow when you saw a letter taped to your locked. Really? Momo’s locker is definitely crowded with other letters, but there was still room at the bottom for more. You frowned, took the letter and taped it back up on your cousins’ locker. There. That wasn’t so hard. You gathered your things quickly and headed home, finally.

The three friends were now hiding before the corner, waiting until you reached your locker. There was no way you could mistake it now. It was fully on your locked and Bakugou wrote your name on it. What could go wrong? Oh no. Bakugou squinted. The more and more he looked, the more he could see your name was missing. No, he definitely put your name there, he was sure of it. That was when he realized that he taped the letter on the wrong side! The side of the letter where your name was, was facing the locked instead of the other way around. Idiot! He got so nervous he made such a critical mistake. Another fail, once again. But third time’s the charm. When you walked away, Bakugou took it upon himself to take back his letter and chased after you. After two failed attempts, he was not going to let it happen again.

Bakugou chased you out of the school building and onto the school grounds, right by the gate.

“Oi, (y/n)!” Bakugou called out your name. You jumped at the sound of your voice and turned around. The wind blew your hair out of the way like a move and the sun was hitting you just right that Bakugou’s cheeks turned pink. He jogged up to you until he was only a few feet away.

When you saw that THE Bakugou Katsuki was talking to you, you felt your voice get caught in your throat. Oh god. Your name came out of his mouth. He was talking to you. This was unreal.

“Here,” He extended his hand out and gave you a letter with a small box of chocolates. You were excited to see him at first, but when you saw what was in his hands, your heart deflated. You were tricked yet again. He was going to ask you to give it to Momo and of course, you’d say yes. You take his gifts and give him a fake, half smile.

“Yeah, I’ll give them to Momo for you,” you tell him. You turn around but Bakugou grabs your arm and spun you back around, shocking you.

“Why would you give it to Momo?” he asks. That left you confused.

“Isn’t this for-“

“It’s for you,” he interrupts you. You stare into his eyes to see if he was joking. He was being dead serious. Then, your heart started to beat again. He liked you. You. Out of everybody in that school. You. He found you beautiful. Funny. Easy to be around. Down to earth. Momo was everything you were and more. But Momo wasn’t you. And he chose you.

#bakugou x reader #bakugou imagine #katsuki bakugou #bnha bakugou #bakugou #my hero academia #bnha imagines #boku no hero academia

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vampiric-daydreams · 4 years

Text

Revelation

Jasper x Reader

This is Part 5 of the Jasper miniseries. Here is Part 1.

Summary: Somewhere between the exhaustion of having your emotions literally toyed with and receiving some shocking news from Alice, you try to develop a deeper understanding of your situation. This leads to a shocking revelation about Jasper.

Word Count: 2,936

Something was definitely going on now, if it wasn’t already.

They sat at their table in the cafeteria, together but not interacting. Alice was looking anywhere but at Jasper, and Jasper seemed starved for her attention. He glanced at you, darting his eyes away when you noticed, almost as if he was ashamed. Alice’s gaze locked with your own mere seconds after, her gorgeous golden eyes pierced with pain. Even after spilling their secrets to you last night, they were still keeping something for themselves. You reflected on what Jasper told you before he left last night.

It’s important that you seek her when you’re ready to listen… You’ll like what she saw for you.

Jasper’s words, the distance between them both… Could it have something to do with that vision? Frowning at Alice, who was still staring back at you, you stood up and walked out of the cafeteria; knowing that she would follow behind you.

Minutes later, Alice met you by the drinking fountains outside a block of classrooms. Her hair, always styled to perfection, was slightly messy; but that in itself was enough to tell you that whatever had been going on last night had gotten worse. As she walked towards you, it was like she suffered more with every step.

“I’m sorry for freaking out last night, I-”

“Don’t apologise for that. It’s a lot to take in at once for anybody.” She forced a smile. You didn’t trust her.

“Well, I’m sorry. I’ve upset you and Jasper with my actions.” You paused. Was now the right time to ask for the rest of her vision? You took the plunge, anyway. “I hope it’s not an inconsiderate time to ask, but Jasper told me I needed to find out more of what you had to say? I shouldn’t have stormed off like that, and he made it sound like I missed something important back there.”

“(Y/N), only if you’re ready to listen, can we get away from here and go someplace a little more private?” For the first time, you noticed, Alice Cullen seemed human. No longer the paradigm of devastating perfection, Alice’s straight brows furrowed, and she toyed with her fingers. Giving her a nod in response, Alice led you away from the school and into the forest you had refused to follow Jasper into only yesterday. But this time, it was different. You knew the Cullens would not kill you, as much as they may want to. Something about Edward struck him as the hypocritical type who would campaign for your death to protect their secret, yet protect Bella at all costs in the same breath.

“He said I’d like what you saw for me. What does that mean?”

Alice halted in front of you, dwarfed by her surroundings of wide trunks and thick, mossy roots. The moist earth squelched beneath your shoes as you took your final steps before stopping behind her. She didn’t turn to face you. “I know about your arrangement with him last night—about how he’s using his gift to suppress your feelings—and (Y/N), it’s wrong.”

“It’s the only thing we can do. I can’t get over him. Even now that he’s out of range, I can feel the love seeping back into my heart.”

“It won’t work,” she spat. She turned around and glared at you. “Nothing either of you do will work and the rest of us have no choice but to accept it. Including me.”

“Alice, I-”

“I didn’t tell you about the rest of the vision I had—the one we’re living in right now.” You didn’t speak again, knowing it was probably easier for her to shoot everything at you at once. “I’ll skip how we were concerned about our secret being safe with you—I can’t afford for you to run off again. This is important. I saw you and Jasper together. I’ve done what I can to see if there’s a way around it, but it seems right. It’s like the universe keeps pushing you together in every alternate scenario,” her voice broke, “and he looked so happy with you.”

“I’m so sor-”

“I need you to hear this. It’s difficult for me to admit that Jasper and I might not be as perfect for each other as I hoped. When I first met him, I had already known we would be married and in love and with our coven. I had that vision twenty-eight years before I met him, and I shaped my entire life as a vampire around it. I practised vegetarianism long before I met him, I–” She cut herself off, almost sounding breathless. “I have to give you my blessing, because the Jasper I saw in that vision with you was a better version of himself, a happier version of himself. I thought I was meant to be with him, but I guess I was wrong.”

“It’s not like Jasper even wants to-”

“I’ve been distancing myself from him; trying to see if I might move on from him. I had a vision and saw myself, perfectly content, with the two of you as a couple. He assumed the woman who changed him was his mate, but he was wrong. Perhaps I was wrong about him?”

“Alice! That can’t be right! He told me how long you’ve been married, there’s no way you wouldn’t have noticed sooner if that were the case!”

She gave you one last defeated expression before she left, and you were alone; your heavy heart threatening to drown you.

Two days had passed, and already your love for Jasper rising and falling like a Yo-Yo was exhausting. All of your energy had drained away. You flopped on your bed and laid there lifelessly; staring up at the ceiling you wondered why it had to be you. Why couldn’t you be a normal person with a normal crush on another normal person? You wondered if Bella ever felt that way.

We need to talk. You didn’t want your first text exchange with Jasper to be so blunt and cold, but you both needed to reassess the mood-control strategy; your body just wasn’t coping.

You went over Alice’s visions in your mind, playing them like a movie. Even through the guilt, your heart fluttered at the thought of a romance being a possibility. Had she seen you kissing?

A powerful sense of nausea hit you as your body threatened to vomit. You still wanted Jasper, and you were sure you always would—but what it was costing both of you was too much to bear. Stuck between the man you loved, who continued to discard you, and his wife who despite her own feelings was determined for you to take him from her. You were a mere human treading water in what felt like a vampire soap opera.

Lulling your head back against the soft pillows supporting you; you allowed yourself to drown, falling deeper and deeper into the sleep that consumed you. Tomorrow, you would get better answers—and you knew just where to get them.

Bella Swan sat awkwardly beside you on the bleachers. She had gym class, but rolled her ankle; and you had a free period. Her chestnut hair was pulled back into a loose ponytail, and she held an ice pack to her right foot.

You watched her as she lowered her chocolate gaze. “Can Edward read your mind, too? Is it weird dating someone who can do that?”

She still didn’t look at you. “No, I’m an exception… For some reason.”

“Bella, c-can—I mean—do you think Edward would speak with me? I know he hates me, but-”

Her eyes met yours. “He doesn’t hate you, he’s just concerned for Alice. But I’ll talk to him and see if I can get him to meet you if you don’t mind telling me what this is about?”

Had Edward even bothered to mention it? “Do you know about the Jasper and Alice thing?” The face she gave you said she did, and then her eyes hardened. “After what Alice told me earlier, and what Jasper said to me last night, I need better context. Edward can read minds so maybe he could tell me what Alice and Jasper both think about everything to help me decide what to do with myself?”

Bella fumbled with the ice pack as she readjusted it on her swollen ankle. “I don’t know…”

“Please, Bella. Jasper was so hot and cold with me the other night, and the way Alice keeps looking at me… I just feel awful. I’ve wanted to be with Jasper for so long, but I never thought it would be like this. I never knew I was wishing for decades-long marriage to end just so I could get what I wanted. Please, Bella. This is insane. All I did was have a crush on a cute boy at school and suddenly I’m the catalyst for vampire divorce.” She tensed at your use of the v-word in such a public place, but you ignored her. “I’m not asking to pry into their entire lives—just the stuff that’s related to me. How truthful was Alice being about giving me her blessing—even if that blessing gave me the right to swoop in on her husband? How is Alice seeing us being together, if Jasper is so worked up and telling me he’ll never love me? I don’t want to embarrass anybody or cause any more harm than I already have. I just want clarity. That’s all. Is that too much to ask?”

Bella hesitated, her top teeth sinking slightly into her plump bottom lip. She clenched the towel wrapped around the ice pack. “It’s reasonable. Look, I’ll talk to Edward later and see what I can do. It’s no fun for the rest of us either, right now.”

You reached over and pulled her into a tight hug. “Thank you so much, Bella.” She pushed away from you, clutching her ankle and wincing in pain. “Sorry…”

The Cullens hadn’t been at school that day, meaning a full day without Jasper’s interventions. It was the first time since the moment you struck your deal with him that you had energy to spare. You could catch up on homework and pay attention to a movie and simply be without wanting to pass out from exhaustion. But being the glutton for punishment this whole scenario was turning you into, you called Jasper. He didn’t pick up. You tried again.

“(Y/N), I told you-” he started, but you cut through his deep voice with your own.

“I want to alter our arrangement. Can you come over?”

“What’s wrong with it?”

“I’ll see you soon.” You hung up. The house was empty and silent, save for the sound of a leaky tap that still needed fixing. To distract yourself as you waited, you tidied up a bit. You washed the pile of dishes in the sink and wiped down the kitchen counters. You picked up the piles of clothes on the floor in your bedroom and actually put them away, folding each garment and telling yourself; he’ll be here after I fold this one. But you remained alone. You pulled your phone out from your pocket and dialled his number again, only to hear a message tone.

Tears pricked in your eyes as you understood he wasn’t coming—that he didn’t care about you or how his gift was affecting you. Surely Alice had been teasing you; dangling your hopes and dreams right in front of your face as payback for all the trouble you had caused her. She and Edward were probably laughing about it right now; laughing at the pathetic human who thought they had a chance. You took a shaky breath and grabbed your coat.

The inside of Bella’s house was cosy. You sat together in her lounge room with a cup of hot chocolate. Chief Swan wouldn’t be home for a few hours, and you couldn’t wait any longer.

“He said no, didn’t he?”

“Edward is… old-fashioned-”

You scoffed. “He thinks I’m immoral, then. I get it.” Your grip on the warm mug tightened. Bella’s sleeves were crunched up in her palms, and her inner debate about whether to continue speaking was clear on her face.

“But we’ve talked about what’s happening with you and he mentioned some things he heard.” She gave you a knowing look.

“Words… or thoughts?” Her lack of response gave you your answer. You put the mug on the coffee table and glanced around, your voice lowering into a whisper. “Is it safe to talk here? I appreciate what you’re doing, but I don’t want to ruin another relationship by involving myself.”

“They’re out hunting today. They’ll find out eventually, but nothing will happen. The Cullens are good, they don’t hurt people.” It wasn’t as though you thought Jasper was planning on killing you to protect his marriage. But you let her go on, dying to receive the intel you desperately needed. “We were driving home in my truck on the first day I transferred to your English class. I knew nothing at first, but when you started asking specific questions, I told Edward. He explained the situation to me—that by that point, you were on the path to discovery no matter what they did about it. I asked him if I could do anything to help, but he said it was useless. All of their energy had to be focused on making sure you accepted the truth instead of exposing them for what they are. Right as you figured it out, he told me Alice had a new vision that was split into two parts. While they were happy you wouldn’t do anything rash, the sight of you kissing Jasper-”

“Kissing-”

“-got them a little riled up at first.” She misread the look of astonishment on your face for one of fear. “Not at you, at him.”

“Jasper won’t have anything to do with me, though. How did we even get to that point?”

“Edward didn’t mention that, but said in passing how they both feel about it. Alice is devastated. Her entire world is crumbling, but she has enough grace and trust in her gift to let it be. She’s been thinking about leaving. There’s a ‘cousin coven’ in Alaska that she’s been contemplating staying with until things blow over. Jasper won’t let her go. No matter what she says to him, he refuses to leave her. He’s hell-bent on rejecting you -… sorry. But Edward said that when he suffocates your affection for him like you agreed, he isn’t happy. Jasper doesn’t enjoy doing it. Edward said that a part of Jasper likes that you like him.”

You couldn’t speak and only stared at Bella with an open mouth. Nothing he had done had showed that he liked your attention—even a tiny shred of it. Your blood boiled within your veins as you hardened your jaw and asked Bella through clenched teeth, “In what way?”

She looked at you, the alabaster skin on her forehead creasing with concern. “Edward didn’t elaborate. It could be reciprocation, but it could also be him just missing the attention? If I ask about it now, he’ll know what I’m doing so that’s all I can tell you at the moment.” She took a sip from her own hot chocolate, her long sleeves now wrinkled, and added, “It sounds like he’s conflicted.”

Your guilty heart skipped a beat as the words left Bella’s mouth. Images of Jasper Hale dipping you into a passionate kiss took over your mind, and you started feeling warmer. Perhaps you shouldn’t have doubted Alice’s gift right off the bat. What if it was going to happen? What if Jasper was only being harsh with you to stop himself from being too tender? You sculled your hot chocolate and slammed the mug back on the coffee table a little too hard; causing Bella to jump at your sudden action. You had to see Jasper again; and no matter how hard he tried to avoid you, you would make another meeting happen. You would ask him to tell you precisely what he was feeling, even if you needed to humiliate yourself once more to do it.

So, you thanked Bella and rushed to your car. The sound of the roaring engine gave you a rush of adrenaline as you followed the roads of Forks—from memory—to the Cullens’ house. A thousand things were going through your mind, but you pushed them aside and pressed harder on the accelerator. As the lights and buildings morphed into a thick wall of trees, you could see the bright colours of the Cullens’ house peeking through the cedars. And waiting by the front of the property, arms crossed and fists clenched, was Jasper; whose eyes were burning holes through your skin.

Tags: @awesome-badass-cafeteria-sauce @eggmettcullen @scuzmunkie @xcharlottemikaelsonx @oi-itsemily @cacti-succulents-andlesbians @aw0kenangel @jelly-fishy-babie @kawaiikpoplover268 @awkwardnesshabitat @salsameter @dillybuggg @awesomebooklover17 @badgirlsdeaddreams @raindancer2004 @camillapad @champagnejoker @tweedlydumbtweedlydoo @starrybumbles @bubblegumcat229 @boywivlove @mauvette268 @pleasantlycrazyworld @dissatisfactionbuthuman

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bangtangcorner · 4 years

Text

Blueberry Muffins - Kim Namjoon

pairings: idol!kim namjoon x half Italian!half Spanish!reader (lol don’t ask why, I did it for fun)

word count: 2.08k

summary: It’s been a few months since you started dating Namjoon. When he texts you one day that he’s in a bad mood, you pay him a visit with the sacred thing that brought you two together : Blueberry Muffins.

warnings: a few cuss words, FLUFF, Yoongi with his gummy smile and Kookie with his bunny smile, Namjoon just being a WHOLE ASS BABY

a/n: I’ve just begun writing on tumblr so I’m a little nervous about putting my stuff out there. I’ll improve with time I promise and I hope you like this! Feedback and criticism of any kind is always appreciated <3

(Edited)

****

“4 blueberry muffins and 1 hot chocolate to go please.” I smiled at Sinthia. Her eyes crinkled as she grinned and started shuffling behind the counter.

“No chocolate chip cookies today?” She asked as she bent down behind the shelf.

“Nope, he’s not in a good mood today. Blueberry muffins are for turning the sour mood into sweet, they somehow always work.”

“I think we both know why they work sweetheart.” Sinthia said as she came up from behind the counter with a paper bag in her hand. I tilted my head to the side and looked at her with a puzzled face, silently asking her what she meant.

“Don’t you remember the first time you both met in this very cafe?”

I smiled as the fond memory replayed in my head.

“The usual Sinthia, thank you.” I smiled at the little woman behind the counter and moved to the side.

My phone vibrated in the back pocket of my jeans. Pulling it out I saw that it was my mom calling, my fingers immediately swiped across the screen.

“Mama!”

“Come stai mio caro? (How are you my darling?)

“Sto bene mama, come stai?" (I’m doing well mom, how are you?)

“Sono grande dolcezza, come vanno le lezioni? Com'è Y/f/n?” (I’m great my sweetness, how are classes? How’s y/f/n?)

“Le lezioni sono frenetiche mama.”(The classes are hectic mom) A sigh escaped past my lips, “Ma per fortuna ho Y/f/n per superare tutta la merda.” (But luckily I have Y/f/n to get through all the shit.)

“linguaggio!” (Language!) I chuckled as she laughed in return. I could imagine her shaking her head, eyes rolling at my behavior.

“I-”

“Excuse me sweetheart.” I whipped my head around to see Sinthia looking at me.

“Yes Sinthia?” I asked my mom to wait for a second and muted the call.

“That young man over there” She pointed to a man behind me. I turned around to see a man with blond hair sitting in the corner booth, his chin perched on his palm as he stared out at the street.

I turned back to look at Sinthia, “What about him?

“He has ordered a blueberry muffin too. But the problem is that I only have one of those sweet treats left and he looked really upset. Do you mind if I give it to him? I can pack your favorite chocolate scones instead.”

I smiled, “Of course, it’s no big deal.”

Sinthia grinned and patted my shoulder, “You really are a gem, tesoro.(Darling)”

“Y/n? la mia bambina? (My baby girl?)”

“Shit” I muttered as I realized my mom was still on hold.

“Mama, posso richiamarti prima o poi? (Mom, Can I call you back in sometime?)

“Certo baby” (Sure baby)

“Va bene, ciao mama, ti amo!” (Okay, bye mom, I love you!)

“Ti amo troppo cara!” (Love you too dear!)

Cutting the call, I saw Sinthia circling around the counter, probably going to give the stranger his order.

“Hey Sinthia, wait up!” She spun around to look at me.

“Do you mind if I give it to him?”

“Do you mind if I ask why?”

“Just wanted to see the man who was stealing my favorite food.” A sly smile took over my face and Sinthia giggled, handing the tray to me.

“He’s all yours.”

I looked down at the tray to see a cup of black coffee and the blueberry muffin I had been craving since yesterday. Shaking my head, I made my way to the corner booth.

“Hey, um, excuse me”

He turned around to look at me, “Yes?”

Suddenly, I couldn’t speak. He was gorgeous, absolutely breathtaking. His blond locks were messy on top of his head, mask pulled down to his chin, lips full and red. His eyes bore into mine as I stood there frozen, unable to do anything in front of the Greek-God like human.He also looked awfully familiar.

“Um?” His voice snapped me out my stance as I cleared my throat and let out a breath I’d been holding since the minute my eyes landed on his beautiful face.

“I, uh, I have your order.” I said, placing the tray on the table.

“Oh, thank you, I didn’t see any waitress when I had walked in?”

“Oh no, I’m not a waitress.”

Now I had begun to question my decision of serving him, why did I ask to do this again? This was probably the stupidest decision of my life.

“Oh okay?” He frowned as he looked up at me.

Without thinking, I quickly slid into the seat in front him and began talking.

“I’ve been coming to this cafe for almost 3 years now. I moved here when I got into Seoul National University. This has kind of been my safe place since then, not to mention Sinthia has been a mother like figure for me. She also helps me learn Korean and sometimes gives me yummy treats for free. Anyways, so today we were partnered up for a literature project and I was paired up with this cocky jock who’s so fucking full of myself. Then someone spilled their coffee on my favorite white top. It’s just been a shit day and I really wanted one of Sinthia’s blueberry muffins with the delicious dark roast she makes. But then it turns out you looked upset too so I let you have the last blueberry muffin.”

At the end of my mini rant, I squeezed my eyes shut, face turning red from embarrassment. I had literally just said random shit to a complete stranger who already looked like he wanted to be left alone.

“Here.” His voice made me snap open my eyes.

He was wiping his mouth with a tissue as he passed me the remaining half of the muffin.

“It looks like we both need something to lighten up.” He smiled and I swear I felt my heart skip a beat.

And then suddenly, it clicked.

“Holy shit” I mumbled.

“Is everything okay?”

I looked him dead in the eye, “You’re RM! Oh my god I just said complete nonsense to one of the biggest stars in the world.” I leaned back against the seat and mentally smacked myself for making a fool out of myself in front of one of the world’s biggest idols.

“Cosa c'è che non va nella tua ragazza!” (What is wrong with you girl!) I muttered to myself.

“Ahh you recognized me, but for now I’m Namjoon.” He took out his hand for me to shake, a small smile still tugged on his lips.

I took a deep breath and calmed myself down and took his extended hand in mine.

“Hi Namjoon, I’m Y/n.”

“You’re Italian Y/n? I heard you speak on the phone earlier.”

“You heard me?” I squealed.

He laughed, “Yeah, it’s 1am in the morning and we’re the only ones here.”

“Wait, you know Italian?”

“A little bit, I could catch a few words you spoke.”

“Half Italian, half Spanish actually.”

“That’s interesting.”

“You bet.”

“Oh by the way, I have no clue why I just came and dumped all of my problems on you, I’m really sorry for that.” I sighed and inwardly cringed at my actions.

“Aigo, stop worrying. Tell me more about your literature project and this jock you’re paired up with.”

“Y/n! Earth to Y/n?” Sinthia waved her hands in front of my face. I jumped slightly and laughed, “Sorry, took a little trip down the memory lane.”

Her face beamed at my words as she passed me the bag of muffins and the cup of hot chocolate.I took out my wallet to pay but was stopped by little hands clutching my fingers.

“Don’t, it’s on me tonight.” Sinthia grinned.

“But I-”

“No buts Y/n, go make your superstar boyfriend’s day.”

“You spoil us too much I swear.”

****

“Noona!”

“Jungkookie!”

Our laughter died in the air as we embraced each other. I pulled back and ruffled his black hair as he gave me his famous bunny smile.

“How are you noona?”

“I’m great Kook, is he still in the studio?”

“Yeah, he’s working on some new tracks with Yoongi hyung.”

“And that of course means he must have not eaten for hours.” I sighed, his habits always worried me.

“You got that right.”

“Good thing I come bearing treats.” I said, raising the paper bag in my hand and shaking it with a cheeky smile on my face.

A big smile stretched across his face as he made grabby hands towards me.

“Gimme Gimme Gimme”

I giggled,”Take one Jungkookie, we have to save some for Yoongi and Namjoon hyung.” Jungkook happily retreated one muffin from the bag and released a content ‘hmm’ after taking the first bite.

“I’m gonna go and see him now Kookie.”

He nodded. “He’ll be happy to see you.”

“알아,준비 됐어 “ (I know, I’m prepared)

His eyes widened as his choked on the muffin. I laughed loudly and made my down the hall to the Rkive.

Knocking twice I heard Yoongi shout, “뭐?” (What?)

Without replying, I opened the door, revealing Namjoon and Yoongi hunched over the studio board. Namjoon’s eyes met mine and a big grin stretched across his face.

“Hi Y/n” Yoongi said smiling while getting up.

“Hey” I said and pulled him in for a side hug.

“What’s that?” He asked, looking at the paper bag in my hand. I opened it and tilted it towards him, “Have one”

He looked down and pushed his hand inside it, pulling out a muffin. A gummy smile appeared on his face as he turned around and pointed at Namjoon,”당신은 자신에게 맞는 여자를 얻었다” (You got yourself the right girl.)

Namjoon chuckled and flipped him off. Yoongi stuck his tongue out at him, gave me one last toothy grin and made his way out of the room, shutting the door behind him.

“Hey” He said as I walked towards him, placing the muffins on the side table. Swinging my leg across his thighs, I straddled him, my arms locking behind his shoulders. His hands take a hold of my waist, face nuzzling in my neck. His deep breath hits my skin, making a shiver run down my spine. I took my right hand and massaged his scalp earning a little whine from him. I giggled, the soft boy in my arms making my heart turn to mush.

“You’re too cute.” My soft voice broke the comfortable silence.

He looked up at me and snorted, “I’m sorry, have you looked at yourself in the mirror jagi? You’re literally the definition of cute.”

Now it was my turn to snort, my hands cupped his rosy cheeks as he leaned in my palm, “Stop being cheesy Joonie.”

“Can’t help it when it comes to you.” He placed a very soft kiss on my lips, letting it linger for a few seconds. My heart combusted at the action, senses fogging as I lost myself in the feeling of his soft lips on mine.

“I got you something to eat.” I said pulling away and getting up. Picking up the bag of muffins, I threw them in his lap and sprawled across the small couch.

He opened the bag and whistled,”You know me too well.”

He immediately started munching on the muffins, now looking much more relaxed under the dim lights of his studio.

“You can’t keep doing this you know.”

“Doing what?” His voice came out muffled as he chewed on the delicious muffin.

“Neglecting your health, overworking, stressing too damn much.”

“I don’t do it purposefully.” He grumbled, brows furrowing.

“I know baby.” I turn to my side and fold my arm, plopping my head on my palm.”But you have to take care of yourself Joon, your heath should be the priority.”

He wiped his hands against the back of his sweats and came towards me. In the next second, I was squeezed below Namjoon’s body.

I squealed, “What the fuck are you doing?! Namjoon!”

“Hmm” He mumbled as his arms circled around my figure and pulled me closer to him, if that was even possible.

“Get up Joonie.” I whined from under him.

“No” He grumbled, placing his head on my chest, his long legs draped over mine.

“We’re too big for this couch Namjoon.”

“Doesn’t matter, just wanna be close to you.”

My breath hitched in my throat as I repeated his words in my head. He was too good to me, I didn’t deserve an angel like him. I shifted underneath him and he whined in return.

“닥쳐 (shut up), I’m trying to get comfortable.”

He hummed.

I smiled to myself.

****

Masterlist

#kim namjoon x reader #kim namjoon #bts x reader #bts fanfction #bts imagines #jeon jungkook #jung hoseok #kim taehyung #kim seokjin #rm x reader #rm bts #kim namjoon imagine #rm imagine

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thepandemicinterviews · 3 years

Text

Lily, December 13 2020, Sydney

The Guardian recently asked their readers how they would describe 2020 in one word. The top two words were ‘shit’ and ‘fucked’. I, too, am partial to the simplicity of a swearword, as you’ll see towards the end of this interview with Lily. I noticed as well our constant usage of crazy and insane to describe anything from literature to dreams to the general feeling of this year. Much like shit or fucked: when faced with utter absurdity, it is difficult for our brains to not reach for the most compact yet forceful words to express a sense of awe (in one of my psychology classes this year, we learnt that awe is apparently a combination of fear, joy, surprise, and embarrassment). There is no value judgment here: crazy, in the sense used below, is not good or bad. There are some emotional reactions that resist language – these overused words are a placeholder for silently screaming. Anyway, let’s lean into the madness and await catharsis. It’s okay to surrender every once in a while.

Today I thought of a better word to describe 2020. Tragicomedy. Merriam-Webster defines tragicomedy as ‘a drama or a situation blending tragic and comic elements.’ Tragicomedy goes hand in hand with a sense of alienation from reality. Amidst long stretches of despair and disconnection, there has been no shortage of satirical articles to help us along. Empty laughter is still laughter. And then there are tears, the ultimate symbol of the tragic. To quote myself in the interview, there’s a lot to cry about.

I honestly feel that tragicomedy is the literary genre that most resembles real life. Or perhaps it is a lens through which to narrativise real life, one that allows for the interlacing of misery and humour. Perhaps some of us are more inclined towards drama than others.

Lily and I were Tumblr mutuals for a few months or a few years, I’m not sure, before finally meeting through real life mutual friends. I was immediately drawn to Lily’s intelligence, her love of literature and all that is slightly intangible. Her unpretentious brilliance and interest in the lives of others resounds loudly in our interview. I feel blessed, and I feel warm, to have recorded this conversation.

With the close of our-year-in-chaos, 2020, as our backdrop, Lily and I ponder dreams, crying, pleasure, and the mysterious early months of the coronavirus. For those who make it to the end of the interview: sadly we did not see any shooting stars as we got the day wrong. But that shouldn’t stop us, or you, from wishing and dreaming for a less tragic 2021.

C: Hi Lily. What’s been on your mind recently?

L: Oh man. A lot of things. Who am I? What am I? And what is this? [Laughs.] I think at the moment I’ve just been very surprised and overwhelmed by being a person. It’s been a very strange year and I’ve been reading a very strange writer in a very strange context for that writer. And I think I’ve just felt sort of strange coming out of that experience now that things are open. And it just feels very strange to be among people again, sort of, and really missing that. But also finding it all very odd. I think when you spend a lot of time, you forget what it is you are. In both a good and bad way. Do you agree Chloe?

C: Well, I’m thinking about how the person you are, or how you conceptualise who you are, when you spend a lot of time with yourself and not with other people – it can change a lot as soon as you start spending a lot of time around other people. Who you are, like what you think you are.

L: I think a lot of what has happened this year is people have spent a lot of time with themselves, and for some that has meant lots of really wonderful things like hobbies and things that they would’ve never taken up if they were living their day to day life with lots of friends and family. Loneliness can always have a very creative effect on people. But I think simultaneously now that we’re all among each other again a bit more, lots of the self-focused things that people were doing during lockdown have made them maybe slightly more intolerant to other people? That’s my experience. At least, both for myself and for others. I don’t know, it’s so strange. I used to never be bothered by other people’s daily things. It used to just not bother me, but suddenly it’s like really irritating.

C: You’re standing too close to me…

L: Exactly, you’re standing too close to me, did you just sneeze. All of these absurd reactions.

C: Literally a year ago today we would have never considered someone coughing on the train concerning.

L: No, exactly. In fact, I used to take pride in not being concerned by anything like that. I was like, the poor person is sick! Good on them for being out and about. That’s really changed. Now it’s like, oh my god, if you get me sick and then I kill someone.

C: There’s so much involved.

L: I actually had a funny experience the other day where – and this is partly why I actually felt like it was sort of fate, Chloe, that you asked to interview me at this point in the year. It’s true, because I think in the early part of the year, I don’t know, I was just – there were a lot of different experiences I was just sort of overwhelmed by. I underwent so many transformations in mood throughout this whole period. And I only think now that I’m sort of coming to a breaking point in my experience of this whole thing.

C: That’s amazing.

L: It is good! And I think yesterday, I just felt really happy. I just felt relieved somehow. I just had this sort of sense of relief in my heart that we’d come to the better side of what all of this is.

C: And the rest of the world is undergoing the worst they’ve ever seen.

L: Undergoing the worst, I know. And that’s so alienating. I think that’s actually probably been my worst and main feeling this year is just feeling sort of alienated from my own experience, from other people. Not really knowing how to talk to people in Melbourne, not really knowing how to talk to my family in the UK and in America. Because I’ve just felt like what was going on for me was just really different. It’s been that combined with I think just, in many ways, it’s just been overwhelming but sort of alienating being inside a lot for a long period of time. Or sort of the opposite of alienating such that you don’t get used to the amount of alienation. Like when you go out in the world and you are different from it, I think there’s a slight sort of alienation but in a really productive way, a way that’s really fun and enjoyable. But this year being inside a lot, you sort of lack all feelings of alienation and completely dwell in your own space, such that you go outside and you’re much more alienated because it’s no longer that nice, sort of productive space anymore. You’re not really a part of that. You feel like you are your house. Space is such a strange thing. When you move through lots of different spaces in the world, you sort of feel more like you’re simply you, in your body, as opposed to an entire space. And I think that’s a nice balance. Being able to envision yourself in different spaces and that’s not too alienating, you just feel part of it, I think. Did that make any sense or was that completely chaotic?

C: It was very chaotic, but I’m thinking about like space at a warehouse party where there’s no space and everyone’s… But there’s enough space that it’s comfortable but you know, you’re surrounded by people and that being allowed.

L: Yeah, it does weird things to people. I think I was originally going to tell a story but then that ended up breaking up into a million different thoughts.

C: Do you know what the story was?

L: Yeah, I do. It has to do with how I sort of came to a breaking point and it’s the significant thing that has happened at the end in terms of Covid this year, in terms of my life this year. Not like in itself as an event, but I felt like a sort of lead up to some event like this. Which was, a couple of days ago I had my first ballet exam. So I did that.

C: First ever?

L: First ever ballet exam. Which was really fun. It was really stressful, but it was fine.

C: Were you with other people?

L: Yeah, I was with two fourteen year olds. So I did that. I hadn’t had any breakfast because I was nervous for the exam. And then I went to the library and I had a talk at 2pm in front of the English faculty and all my Honours cohort. And it was just on something you’d learnt, so of course I hadn’t written it. I just thought, I’ve learnt so many things, I’ll be able to just come together and say something. And I ended up sort of thinking what could I use to reflect on my year. And I found some sort of quote from one of my second year essays. It wasn’t even a particularly good essay, but I was like yeah, I think that quote that I wrote about in that essay really fits this whole theme. And we’re at this talk and the first two speakers at the event were quite funny. Very well curated talks. One girl even said afterwards that she’d recorded herself speaking, which I found fascinating that she’d recorded herself. I was like, wow, these five to seven minutes were…

C: That important to her.

L: They were that important! She was going to make them good. I, on the other hand, wrote my speech in forty minutes when I hadn’t had lunch or breakfast. It was like 1:30pm. Anyway, I loved those two speakers. I still pretty much had faith in myself to speak on the spot and say something, which was maybe cocky. It was so strange when I got up and started speaking, and the first thing I said was, it’s so nice just to be here in this space among humans. I just started going on about how everyone looked so different three-dimensionally. It was so nice to hear voices, I just wanted to hear voices. That was sort of why I wanted to do this [laughs]. I just missed hearing the human voice. And I just started crying! Like, really crying. So much, at one point I was like okay, I’m just going to take a few breaths. I took a few breaths, and as I went back to talk I sort of like – you know when someone sort of cry-coughs in this weird way? And as I sort of cry-coughed trying to speak, a big bit of snot flew out of my nose, onto my hand!

C: How many people are here?

L: Like all of my English professors. The room was full with thirty-five people maybe. People who are my teachers. Everyone was there. When I saw the snot – there were no tissues, because obviously everyone’s like, no one should be sick if they’re going to be out, so we didn’t have tissues around. What they did have was a bloody Covid anti-bacterial cloth [laughs]. I sort of looked at it, went to grab it, and then was like, okay, no. That would be too much.

C: So good. A real Covid story!

L: Yeah. But I genuinely, I just kept crying, it was horrible. I completely lost the thread of what I was saying. I was like, I read Middlemarch in [so-and-so’s] class, and it was really good. And I thought that Dorothy and Will’s love was real – I just said all these ridiculous things. And I told everyone that before Honours, I used to dream about my essays, but I found instead this year it was really boring, which is probably the worst thing that I said!

C: You didn’t have any dreams about your essays?

L: I used to dream about my essays.

C: But not this year?

L: I probably have dreamt about them this year, but I’ve had fewer essays. And they’ve just been research essays, where the sensation of dreaming, it’s more like a nightmare. It’s like, oh my god, did I say that?

C: Do you dream about them after they’re written or are they like dreams that are conjuring up ideas?

L: Okay, I have to admit I still do have dreams in the nice way. But like probably two. Whereas I used to just have dreams, they used to be relaxing, that was the main thing that happened with essays.

C: What did one of the dreams look like?

L: Where you feel like you’re – I’ve always just described the sensation of just like getting deeper into something. You’re just like, yes, I’m going to get the mystery of this whole subject! I can feel the mystery in my fingers. Just this really sort of crazy sensation that makes you not want to wake up because it’s so good.

C: Wow. I don’t think I’ve ever had an essay dream. It sounds fantastic. Mine are like quite just not clear.

L: How do you feel in your dreams?

C: I feel like I’m just not really there. I don’t really have thoughts, I’m just… It’s not linked to me.

L: Yeah, they’re not linked to you. They’re not like intense.

C: They’re intense, but they’re not linked to my real life in the way that digging into your already existing essay is.

L: Right. They’re sort of glimpses of worlds. Is that how it feels? Are they like human worlds or are they like colours?

C: Oh yeah. No, I have dreams about things that are happening.

L: Not like directly happening to you.

C: It all feels a bit vague and murky. It’s not like a sharp, like, we’re writing an essay.

L: It’s funny, I mean I wouldn’t describe them as sharp because they’re still vague, but I think it’s more like a degree of intensity. Because you wake up in the morning, you don’t know what – like what can I say except that I was dreaming about the essay. Sometimes I can articulate clear ideas but they’re always just completely nonsensical if you go to say them. They just sound like very weird words. Someone’s always doing something unexpected, something that just doesn’t really fit or even necessarily reveal anything deep and meaningful. There’s this really chaotic element, and then there’s this sort of sharp sensation that it’s linked to something that is going on, maybe, with your life. And maybe that’s what – you have a dream, you don’t necessarily feel like it actually reflects anything in your real life in a clear – yeah, it’s not connected to that. It’s something else. But I think my dreams are vague. I don’t know anyone who has non-vague dreams. Can you imagine?

C: No, my friend has like really detailed and long dreams. And she can write it all out and it’s like a whole page.

L: I can write out my dreams. But they’re just crazy.

C: So you remember them?

L: I do remember them, yeah. If I write them.

C: But I wake up and I can’t remember it to the point of writing it. I can kind of feel it.

L: You feel that you had a dream.

C: I can feel it, and I maybe get little glimmers of a memory, but then it goes.

L: Yeah. I find those little hauntings so strange when you get a glimmer of a memory of a dream. It’s so crazy. I think because I dream a lot, I often have them throughout the day but I can’t remember when I dreamt that dream. But it gives everything an eerie feeling. Like what the hell. It’s like I’m living another life sort of in their dream and it’s affecting me emotionally. But just like, what’s the relationship between that dreaming world and that world that you didn’t consciously produce.

C: And for some people the lines are more blurred.

L: For sure. I think it’s always scared me, I feel for me they’re quite blurred. And I think it’s a scary sensation, you really can’t go too far with that.

C: Yeah.

L: I think honestly the thing that’s blurred the lines for me the most is literature and dreaming. I always find it really surprising that other people don’t realise how crazy literature is. It’s insane. What’s disconcerted me and what particularly disconcerted me on that day at the talk at the English department was I was like, how do people study this stuff? Like what is going on here. All of these people are dressed up like this is their job? This is the craziest thing in the world! Literature is insane! Do you guys know what you’re doing?

C: Let’s stop pretending. Stop wearing those suits.

L: Why are we pretending? I think particularly while I was crying, I was like, if you think this is crazy, have you ever read a book? You guys, you’ve all read books. This is normal, this is fine, this stuff happens. Much worse happens!

C: No, it’s the best place to do that.

L: Yes.

C: Citi did a similar thing in her acting class. She was meant to be doing some kind of role play. And then she just started laughing, and then crying, and she couldn’t stop.

L: No! Yes. Ugh. I hate that, I hate that. I mean, it’s sort of – I love criers, I love people who cry. I think crying can be incited by so many things. Crying, I think, it’s often its best and its worst at times when you’ve experienced some bit of rejection or grief. Like it doesn’t have to be a real rejection, just you perceive rejection. And if one other disappointment just really sort of crushes something of you at that moment, and it needs to be released in tears. And it can feel really good. It’s intense, though.

C: It’s intense in front of other people.

L: Yeah. Why does it feel so embarrassing? It’s all snotty.

C: Imagine if people just cried all the time around each other.

L: Some people can’t cry. My boyfriend’s like, I don’t cry, I can’t cry.

C: That’s fucked.

L: I don’t understand. I definitely cry once a week.

C: Same. There’s a lot to cry about.

L: There’s a lot to cry about. I used to have amazing crying fits before I was in a relationship. Now you can’t really have crying fits unless you’re by yourself.

C: You live with someone.

L: You live with someone and they’re like, what is wrong? And you’re like, I just need to do this.

C: It feels good.

L: Yeah, it’s hard for people to imagine. Some people just completely freak out about crying. When I came home I told my housemate what had happened, and he said, that sounds terrible, I wouldn’t have liked to be in the audience. There are just a lot of people for whom criers are just really embarrassing. And they’re just like, oh my god, I can’t believe you’re expressing emotion, I would never do that.

C: And that’s literature. It’s so tied to expressing emotion in socially not accepted ways.

L: Yes, for sure. All the different ways that people cope. Which is so strange to think. I can’t imagine being a person who doesn’t think about that all the time. How do people cope? What are they doing? There are so many ways of doing it, but you don’t know unless you talk to people or you read books, what’s going on for them. And often people don’t at least talk to each other in that sort of way. It’s more of a thing now amongst the young. But still, even though, lots of people have a lot of trouble. And you can always get better, really. It’s kind of like, I don’t really know entirely what’s going on with me obviously. No one knows for sure. Like we were talking about earlier, sort of with psychology, there’s only so much you get to know yourself without someone else.

[Both deeply sigh.]

C: Just seeing that in writing, like, both sigh deeply [laughs].

L: That was a massive sigh! I think we both needed to take a breath as well.

C: My yoga class today I found that I could breathe in time to [the instructor] a lot easier, a lot more naturally. Like my breathing improved. So that was nice.

L: That’s beautiful. The breathing is so nice, right? I used to hate breathing, but I like it now.

C: It’s a muscle that you have to train.

L: Yeah, it’s true. When it’s properly trained. I think running has really helped train my breath. I love the feeling of deepening your lungs. A sort of internal stretch.

C: Beautiful. Internal stretch. Good band name, perhaps?

L: It’s a bit scary! Chloe! This is hilarious.

* * *

L: I’ve really just missed overhearing conversations actually. That’s the one thing I wanted to tell you was that there’s something particularly beautiful about your blog to me, because the thing that I’ve missed most is not hearing other people have conversations. For almost no point as well, like a conversation that’s purely just about like, who are you, who am I, what’s going on? You know what I mean?

C: Yeah, and people have a lot to say if you ask.

L: Exactly, exactly. If you are just a bit curious.

C: Often in social settings, in a group, you don’t really get to ask about people’s thoughts and feelings.

L: Yeah, it’s true. I think often we just wait for people to come to us to say things that they want to say. There are so many things that people would just never say for that reason because they’re not going to think that you’re interested.

C: It’s amazing what a bit of interest can do to someone. That’s all like counselling. Someone actually cares.

L: Someone cares. Interest makes people interesting, usually, as well. Because they don’t just give you the sort of one word, ordinary answer where it’s just for the sake of it. If you actually seem interested, they might try to give you a real answer.

C: Ask further questions.

L: What’s the most interesting question someone has ever asked you? Or is there any question that someone has asked you and you’ve been like, wow, that was really psychic?

C: I can’t think of anything right now.

L: It’s hard to come up with on the spot.

C: Can you think of anything?

L: No, actually. But I think one thing that I’ve noticed, I used to not answer people’s questions because I thought they weren’t interesting. But then I went through this period of really liking it, and now I think this year almost I haven’t been that interested in people’s questions. Which I think is strange. It’s strange not just really really liking people’s questions. Maybe people haven’t really asked me any questions. Because I haven’t had that experience this year very much of having questions posed to me, and finding that interesting. I was noticing the other day, I was just like, what has happened? Has someone done this to me? Do I not like questions anymore? But I think that’s just, when you’re not at university and you’re not meeting people very often, people you don’t see day to day. People day to day, who live with you day to day often don’t ask you big questions. They’ll ask you little questions and because they observe you every day, they don’t necessarily realise that there might be all kinds of things going on inside of you unless you express that.

* * *

L: Pleasure is a very good thing. I don’t like it as much as I used to though. I don’t know, in some ways I like it more.

C: What kinds of pleasure? Just like pleasure in its purest form?

L: Yeah, enjoying food, sex, music. Very sort of sensory excitement. Genuine pleasure.

C: Those are the three pleasures! Food, sex, music.

L: There are other pleasures, but… Reading novels is a different sensation, it’s not quite as immediate. You have to build a sort of story. And of course, we can feel ourselves as part of stories as well and that can be very pleasurable sometimes. It’s like, I’m this sort of person, I have this sort of trace, these are my people. That stuff can be really meaningful even if not sort of directly pleasurable in the same way. I think that’s the really nice thing about direct pleasure, it takes you away from that more satisfying pleasure, like you’re on the sort of story narrative. People need a break from that, because often people don’t feel like they’re in a very good story.

C: I have just over – I don’t know, maybe it’s not over, like maybe it’s just normal and good – I just always create these narratives for what’s going to happen, what that means, and it never works that way. So I should stop narrativising but, you know, it’s instinctual.

L: It’s so instinctual. But the horrible thing about it I find is that it’s not just sort of narrativising what has happened, it is narrativising what’s going to happen in the future. When it comes to the future, it’s terrible because you just have so little control over it. So basically whatever you imagine is just not going to happen. Unlike with the past where it’s already happened.

C: Exactly. Sometimes I’m like, if I’m imagining this, it won’t happen. The chances are.

L: It’s true.

C: I just had a bit of a rollercoaster and I’ve come to the point where I’m like relationships don’t happen. Like it’s impossible. I’m not going to try to date anymore because it’s just futile.

L: Dating is one of the hardest things to try to plot and plan. Like you can meet people, but I think the worst thing is that a lot of people who are looking to meet people are a little bit – like they’re looking to meet lots of people, or they’re not necessarily looking to have a proper relationship. And if they are, often that doesn’t work out either because two people who are just looking to have a relationship aren’t going to work out.

C: Yeah, it takes away the spontaneity.

L: Yeah, not just the spontaneity but sometimes then you are with someone who you don’t want to be with. So how’s it going to last? Whereas, if you’re sort of compelled to be together…

* * *

L: Wow. I can’t believe we’re coming to the end of this sort of historical event, this year, 2020. Though it’s so weird it was called Covid-19. That always screwed me. It made no sense.

C: It’s because it existed in December 2019.

L: I know.

C: But no one knew. It’s crazy, have you gone back to any old news articles about it? You should.

L: I have something to confess, which is I was obsessed with the news story so early on, when there were like twenty cases.

C: No, me too! Like it all hit one day, when I was reading all these New York Times briefings on the plane. I was like, whoa, it’s spreading. But it was still such low numbers in those days. We had no idea.

L: I was reading about it before they knew that it was contagious. Like far before they knew that. Where they thought people only got it directly from an animal – there was that whole story. And the reason why I was so obsessed with it is because I was convinced that – well, I was very very unwell at that time and I thought I had Covid. In a way that made no sense whatsoever, made everyone think that I was crazy. Actually used all my data while I was travelling on reading about the twenty cases in the entire world! And I was just like, I am dying! The story gets me! We’re all going to die! Sam was just like, this makes no sense. You’re completely insane. It’s so weird. I still find that so strange. I was convinced when it was completely crazy. It’s because I was extremely unwell and probably did have Covid.

C: Do you think?

L: Yeah, well they know now through the poop samples that people in Italy had it in December as well.

C: Really?

L: I was there all through January, in all the busy museums, and I got this very very strange sickness where I just started with a cough and a fever, and it was a really really awful cough. Like I coughed blood, I was really really unwell. And I’d never been sick in that particular way with a cough and a fever. And like a horrible cough. I felt like I was going to die, like my lungs were going to collapse or something. I was so confused. That’s why I was so obsessed with the story, it just seemed really dramatic.

C: That sounds like you had it!

L: And Sam had the same thing, it was really weird. We had the same identical coughing and fever.

C: Okay, you definitely had Covid then.

L: Yeah, I think it probably was Covid! But it was unthinkable!

C: Yeah, you’re perfect for this interview. This is great content.

L: I’ve definitely told so many people that story this year because it’s just so dramatic. But when I came back in February, people were still like, it’s just a media… Like it’s not here at all.

C: Yeah, respectable people. It was like, it’s anti-China.

L: Which was a reasonable sort of thing to think. You know what I mean.

C: Yeah, because they were blocking international students. Like that was a trigger.

L: Yeah, and of course there’s been a lot of Australia-China stuff for a long time, so it makes sense.

C: And now the fact of anyone coming into the country without being in hotel quarantine is unthinkable.

L: Is unthinkable, yeah.

C: Crazy how we’ve just switched.

L: We’ve just completely adapted. Now like, yep, this is the way it is. Hard to even imagine post-pandemic life. Where we don’t have to wash our hands, or sign in to a restaurant, get a Covid test if we get a cold.

C: I haven’t been tested. I haven’t had a cold.

L: I haven’t been sick basically at all this year, except for last weekend, where I had a day where I sort of sneezed twice. I felt kind of unwell, I had a bit of a fever. Well, I felt I did and a sore throat. But it just sort of cleared away the next day. Sam was really unwell, so I thought I had got his – Sam was like, he’s been coughing and…

C: Did he get tested?

L: He’s been tested like a million times. He’s been sick a lot this year which is hilarious, because I haven’t been sick at all and I always get sick. But for some reason he’s gotten sick heaps this year. It’s sort of completely reversed. But I think actually, he said that in previous years he would never sort of give himself the permission to be sick because he would just keep wanting to go on and do stuff. But now because you can’t do that, because you’re like, well you might kill someone if you…

C: Yeah, it’s so extreme.

L: It’s so extreme. So when he’s felt sick, he’s been like, okay, I’m sick. And I think he’s actually been sick in this sort of – it’s very very odd.

C: Like he’s willed it onto himself.

L: Well, he’s just like, well now it’s okay. I’m going to say I’m sick right now. I’m just going to be sick. Whereas previously he’d almost pretend like he wasn’t, because he would prefer to keep living his life as normal. You can’t just keep living your life as normal if you’re sick anymore.

C: It’s rough.

L: I forgot what the question was.

C: There was no question. I don’t feel like I’ve asked any questions except for the first one. And that’s all we need! It was the perfect opener. Maybe I’ll do one last question. What kind of writing or any kind of art do you think will come out of, or be used in future works…?

L: About this period?

C: How do you think it’ll affect the literary landscape or film landscape?

L: Yeah. It’s a very very good question. I think a lot of things could happen. Because this year has pushed so many people to spend so much time with people they wouldn’t usually spend so much time with. As well as taking them away from other people. And force them to interact in entirely different ways. So I think there’s going to be a lot in terms of the sorts of relationships people have during Covid. I think the whole experience of people starting to date someone at the beginning of Covid, Covid happened, then they basically moved in with each other and got married. That is so weird! I think people are going to be writing about that sort of experience for a long time, because I think that would be so bizarre emotionally.

C: It’s like the first ever universal experience that we, in our generation, have experienced.

L: It really is. And I think that’s why in the beginning I was almost slightly excited. Like I remember looking on people’s Facebooks and being like, wow, I’m bonding with everyone!

C: Yeah, absolutely! But now it’s split off in so many…

L: Yeah! I think what’s so strange is that we had that experience, and for that reason at the beginning of the pandemic I was like, maybe people will become closer to one another, and be more reflective. I don’t know, like they’ll feel closer to each other. But I think actually it’s come out the other end and there’s a lot of alienation. And yeah, I think for that reason, there’s probably going to be lots of weird art about that as well.

C: Covid and conspiracy theories and Trump, all in the same very concentrated time. It’s like they all bounce off each other to create awfulness.

L: Under these sorts of circumstances, you can see why people would believe all sorts of insane things. It’s been an insane year. And I think a lot of the problems that we had before in terms of people being isolated, and they’re in their own sort of groups, whether they be good or completely awful. Just becoming completely radicalised. That has all been pushed to a much greater extreme than we could’ve foreseen. It was something that was happening much more gradually. I’m very very interested, and I kind of hope that we’ve reached a crisis point, and that this year leads to things getting better not worse. Like it hasn’t sort of just pushed the worst along. That’s the thing I hope the most for.

C: Well, definitely looks like some things have happened. Like Trump is no longer going to be president. Huge. Also, other thing that comes to mind is that Medicare-funded psychology sessions is up to 20. So maybe there’ll be more good things.

L: There will, yeah. Lots of things have shifted. Lots of people have gotten things that they wouldn’t have had otherwise this year. And I think myself included, I don’t think I would’ve learnt Italian this year without having a lot of money from the government.

C: And time.

L: And time! And I wouldn’t have felt as bored so as to be compelled to do it.

C: And now you’re going to be studying Italian!

L: Now I’m studying Italian next year! And I love languages! Lots of people have gotten weird good things out of this year. You can’t plan, you don’t know what’s going to happen. Sometimes I think – at least there was a point in the year where I really felt this – that Covid was just mixing everything up. Like it was just mixing everyone’s life up. And that mixing could be really good. It has been, for many people, as well as bad. It’s hard to know what to focus on sometimes.

C: And ultimately it is just completely out of your control. Like there’s no personal agency, really. That’s the messaging, but it depends so much on like actually having these laws enforced. Because in America, they don’t. So it’s on them to be really judgey about like mask-wearing, which is good, but it shouldn’t be on the individual.

L: No, it just creates a horrible culture as well amongst people. I think when you perceive other people to be in control, they just start becoming enemies, or you feel this really intense moralising impulse, which you don’t feel when you’re part of a community where it’s organised around being good.

C: Yeah, has leadership.

L: Yeah.

[Both deeply sigh again.]

C: Any last words?

L: Any last words. What are you thinking? You started this by asking me what I’m thinking.

C: I’m thinking how nice it is to be able to talk about it all. People don’t talk about things enough.

L: I agree.

C: 2020’s just been the most insane year, and we’re just like completely desensitised. But like, shit’s fucked. Shit’s fucked in the US. People are crazy. Like 50% of the population is fucked.

L: It’s completely awful.

C: Is that a good note to end on? Probably not.

L: I really don’t believe that that’s a good note to end on! [Laughs]. I don’t know, I was thinking before Covid, I think I was really focused on people suffering actually. But I think since Covid, I’ve just retreated into myself a bit. And I’ve avoided, because I’ve just gotten so tired of hearing about more numbers. I’m just really fatigued and I kind of just want to pretend like it’s not happening. Which doesn’t feel good, it actually feels horrible to be disconnected like that.

C: Just like imagine being the leader of a country that has 300,000 Covid deaths and like not caring at all. Like it’s fucked. Imagine 50% of the population feeling the same way.

L: No, it’s very much a sign that people are just not connected to reality. Not to other people’s emotional realities. People have started just seeming like objects, like they’re playing out in some world. But I think every single human being is unimaginably special, which sounds really – I hope it’s not too kooky of an idea. But yeah, people are just really special, and impossible to describe. It’s so weird but I think that a lot of what has gone on in people minds is that people have just started to seem replaceable or just sort of like shells of themselves, like characters rather than actually a living person who wants things for themselves, and things for others, and has all of this stuff going on.

[Long pause.]

L: There’s no way to end this is there?

C: So… do you have hope for the world?

L: Well, I don’t know, do I? I’m not a pessimist. I just feel very confused now though. I really don’t know. I’ve come out of this year very confused about what’s good and bad. I think this year has raised a lot of questions like that because we’ve had that thing where we’ve had our government be much more controlling, and that’s happened all around the world. Is that good? It has been good? Because we’ve seen what happens when you don’t do that. That’s also a very strange experience, which I have mixed feelings about.

C: We’ve had it really easy in Sydney though.

L: It’s true, we haven’t had to be controlled very much at all.

C: But for a few weeks there it was like, can I sit on this park bench?

L: You couldn’t.

C: It was crazy.

L: I remember that. Or when someone got fined for sitting down to eat their kebab.

C: Yeah, that’s so ridiculous.

L: You couldn’t go out with more than one person from your household.

C: Well, I was still working a little bit, so I still got the train and served people in the shop. So I feel like I didn’t really have a full lockdown experience.

L: It’s so weird that so many shops were open.

C: Yeah, we never had shops shut here. In New Zealand, they did the full like four weeks, no shops, no takeaway, just cook at home, go to the supermarket, that’s all you do. Four weeks.

L: That is crazy to think of. No, things have pretty much carried out as normal here in comparison. It’s just been an atmosphere among people. Like we’ve been allowed to do lots of things but there are places where you can’t sit near people. There’s a lot of cleaning happening.

C: It is pretty chill now compared to a few months ago. It’s all dependent on the contact tracing. You know, how interesting it is to think about all the maths behind it and tracking down this invisible thing that’s been passed around.

L: Yeah, it’s incredible. The sky looks like a sunset almost, it’s so bright.

C: Yeah, it’s strange.

L: On Thursday night, there’s going to be forty shooting stars per hour apparently.

C: When?

L: Thursday night between 2am and sunrise.

C: Oh wow. Are you going to be up for it?

L: I think I will. It’s the day before my thesis is due. So I think I’ll probably be up anyway.

C: Okay. I have work the next day but do you think I could see it from here?

L: Apparently you can see it all over Australia.

C: I don’t know if I can usually see stars from here though. I don’t think I can. Maybe in the backyard, a little bit. I’ll try and remember. We can text each other.

L: I really want to stay up for that. We’ll see some of it. I’ve never seen a shooting star.

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kpopscenario · 5 years

Text

are you nervous?

Pairing: Reader x Lee Chan

Genre: Smut, lowkey fluff??

Word count: 9.5K

Summary: Basically Chan asks out his crush and ends up giving away some power. (Sub!Chan, Dom!Reader)

“I told you that you’d get an A, dumbass”, Seungkwan said as he lightly hit Chan in a playful way but still with a mad expression on his face. Chan was simply staring at the paper in front of him, it was the math’s exam from last week. Chan was always pretty good in math’s, he never really had to learn, he always was able to pick up stuff like that easily so it was no surprise to his friends that he, once again, got the best grade in class, but it sure was surprising to him.

“There must be a mistake…”, he said nervously as he scanned the exam with his eyes. “I was sure that I fucked up this exam badly, how-“,“Oh shut up Chan, you always say shit like ‘oh my god the exam was so hard’ but you always end up with an A.” “But this time it was different!”, I exclaimed after Seungkwan was done with his nagging. He simply rolled his eyes as he held up his exam. “You know who had the right to be worried about this exam? Me, look at this! C-? What is this, I actually thought I’d get like a B, this is discriminating behavior and I’m NOT having it”, he cried out which made Vernon who was sitting next to him chuckle. “You’re still convinced that our math’s teacher hates you?”, he asked Seungkwan who just nodded his head exaggeratingly. “At this point I’m convinced that math’s hates you, not our teacher, she’s literally 62 bro, I don’t think she hates anyone but the menopause…”, Vernon said, which would have normally made me laugh but I really wasn’t in the mood for laughing at that moment. “I got an A, guys!”, I said devastated as I threw the sheets on my table and threw myself back in the chair, Seungkwan looked at me with a confused expression. “Oh no? That’s so horrible?”, he said with a sarcastic tone in his voice. “Did you forget about the bet?”, Vernon asked Seungkwan which just made me sigh theatrically, it was silent for a few seconds. Seungkwan looked at Vernon, still confused, he was thinking very hard until his whole face suddenly lit up and he excitedly turned towards me. “Oh you’re SO fucked”,” Yeah, no shit.”. Chan closed his eyes and sighed once again as he was remembering last week, how could he be so dumb and naïve? He remembers how he dramatically exited the classroom and how he exclaimed that it was “the worst exam in history of exams”, he also remembers how every single person in his friend group tried to reassure him that he’ll end up with an amazing grade, he could’ve kept his mouth shut but being the perfectionistic guy he is he immediately insisted on him definitely getting anything but an A. Jeonghan immediately took the chance he got and offered Chan that he’d write that huge essay in English literature for him if he actually got anything less than an A. Chan immediately was stretching out his hand towards Jeonghan as he heard the deal. “Have fun writing it.”, he had simply said but Jeonghan just shook his head. “If you get an A you have to confess your crush to y/n… and you have to ask her out!”, that was the moment where Chan should’ve taken his hand back and again, shut his mouth, but instead he took Jeonhan’s hand into his and shook it with determination in his eyes.

“Deal.”

Great, fucking great. As the bell rang, he made his way to the cafeteria with Seungkwan and Vernon who were looking for y/n. Chan just send his quiet prayers, he wasn’t hoping that y/n would go out with him, no, he was praying for a plane to crash into his school and just take him out. Once they arrived at the cafeteria they made their way to their usual place where Jeonghan, Wonwoo and Soonyoung were already sitting and eating. Chan sat down after he greeted them and hoped that maybe Jeonghan forgot about the bet?

“So, what did you get?”, Chan closed his eyes for a few seconds until he finally spoke up. “You know? Everybody deserves a second chance, also, we’re older now! Who cares about stupid ‘bets’? What are we? Sixteen?”, Chan said as he looked at Jeonghan who just raised his eyebrows with amusement in his face. “Oh, you’re so fucked”, he simply said while laughing as he took another bite of his sandwich. “So, when are you gonna ask her out, or how I would put it, when are you gonna embarrass yourself in front of the whole school?”, Wonwoo asked casually which made Chan glare at him. “I won’t embarrass myself in front of the whole school!” “Oh, so you think she’ll say yes?”, Soonyoung suddenly asked. “No, of course not, I’m not delusional, I’ll just ask her when she’s alone so no one can witness the worst five minutes of my life.”, I simply said as I took out my food. “Fair enough.”, Vernon said with a shrug as he took out his food too. They didn’t really open that topic anymore but rather moved on and talked about general stuff like ‘who could fit more sushi in his mouth’ (of course it was Soonyoung, but they just loved discussing dumb things like that.). While everyone was chatting, Chan was lost in his thoughts. He has had an enormous crush on y/n for about two years, more precisely, he has had a crush on y/n since that incident on the school corridor. He remembers how he was new at school and how he neither had any friends nor knew how to get to his classroom, he was pretty lost when suddenly the most beautiful girl he had ever seen appears in front of him and asks him whether he needed help. He remembers how he just nodded his head and stretched out his hand with his schedule in it, too speechless and too shy to get a proper sentence out of his mouth. He remembers how he was just staring at her with big eyes as she was explaining where he would have to go, he also remembers stuttering out a small ‘thank you’ and basically running away into the completely wrong direction and coming late to class, the first day sure was a rollercoaster for Chan. Two years later and here he was, literally staring at her whenever she’d walk by him and blushing furiously whenever she’d look in his direction. Y/N was a pretty popular girl, she had a lot of friends and was invited to basically every party, guys were basically on their knees for her and she was excellent in school, she was also about a year older than Chan and probably completely forgot about his existence, which he was completely fine, if not even happy with. Don’t get him wrong, he imagined it hundreds of times how it would be to go on a date with her and how it would be to feel her hand in his, but he knew that he’d never have the balls to actually ask her out and now he’d suddenly have to throw all of his worries and shyness overboard and just ask her out like that? He was already cringing at himself as he played out different ways of how he could possibly ask her out. Time went by way too fast and Chan had to pack his things again, only Vernon and Seungkwan were by his side as he made his way to his next class. Soonyoung, Wonwoo and Jeonghan were lucky enough to Have lunch for two hours so they just stayed and continued having discussions about life. “Today’s your lucky day, Chan!”, Seungkwan suddenly exclaimed excitedly as he nodded towards a direction. Chan looked at him confusedly, obviously done with his shit as he looked into the direction he was indicating. His heart immediately dropped as he saw y/n standing there in front of her locker. She was about to take some books out and more importantly, she was alone. “She… She seems busy, let’s just go, the week is long-“, “it’s Friday”, “- and I sure will find another day on which I can-“, “Don’t be a pussy Chan, a bet is a bet.”, Seungkwan said which made me glare at him. “I’m not a pussy-“, “Great, then go ask her out.”, Vernon suddenly said as he leaned against the lockers behind him, Seungkwan mimicked his actions and just looked at me with expecting eyes. Chan just stood there in front of them and pressed his lips together, he was waiting for a few seconds to make sure that there really wasn’t a plane crashing into the school. “You know what? I’ll do it.”, “Go on then.”, “No, I mean it, I’ll do it.”, “Great, do it.”, Chan frowned a little as he looked at y/n, his heart started beating faster and he felt that his face was getting hotter and hotter. “… okay maybe I won’t actually do it.”, “Just do it for fucks sake!”, Seungkwan suddenly said as he pushed him into her direction which made Chan look at him with big eyes. Vernon and Seungkwan just indicated that he should finally get his shit together and go to her, which he did, but just really, really slowly. He took small steps towards her and hoped that maybe a friend of hers would come up to her and start having a conversation, but luck wasn’t on his side today. Once he stood behind her he looked at Vernon and Seungkwan once again, he rolled his eyes at the sight of the two guys, they were basically staring, the only thing that was missing was some popcorn for the two of them. Chan then put his attention back to the slightly smaller girl in front of him, his knees were weak and he felt like he might vomit any second due to the nervous feeling in his stomach, it took him seconds which felt like hours to actually raise his hand to lightly tap on her shoulder (he lowkey cringed on the inside when he did that but oh well, it was to late to turn back). Y/N didn’t react immediately, she expected it to be one of her friends but as she finally turned around and looked up, she was surprised to see a not so familiar face. “Oh, hi!”, she said as she looked at him with confusion in her eyes, yet still a smile on her pretty lips. Chan’s eyes widened a little as he had her whole attention on him now, he went through his hair with his hands and tried to calm himself down mentally before he’d actually talk. ‘I can do this, I’m not a pussy, I can talk to her, just say ‘hi I’m Chan, you’re really pretty, wanna go on a date?’ and everything should be alright, right? Easy!’

“Hi, eh… I’m Chan… you probably don’t remember me but you once tried to show me the way to my class like two years ago and that was really nice of you and I lowkey had a big crush on you since then… okay that was a lie… I have a huge crush on you and I lost a stupid bet which led to this conversation we’re having right now, I mean, otherwise I would’ve never talked to you since you’re intimidatingly pretty and I really like the mole you have under your eye and yeah, since I lost I have to ask you out on a date and I know this seems really fucking weird because… well, because it IS really weird and I’m probably embarrassing myself really badly but since I lost the bet I’m here to ask you out on a date, which I already mentioned before, so, can you please end this misery I call life and just tell me that I should fuck off?”. Chan wasn’t looking into her eyes as he was telling her all of that, one hand of his was constantly brushing through his hair while the other one was used to gesticulate or rather emphasize what he was saying. Not only did he say all of those things in a extremely fast pace but he also was a stuttering mess and his voice was shaking, his face probably was as red as a stop sign and he was completely breathless after he was done with his talk since he didn’t take one break throughout his whole ‘speech’.

He didn’t dare to look up into her eyes, he was way too scared of her expression. Would she be amused? Annoyed? Weirded out? All of the above? Chan was mortified and his heart still wasn’t slowing down. After a few seconds of complete silence on both sides he noticed that Y/N closed her locker and leaned against it with her books in her arms, he still didn’t dare to say one word, instead he slowly looked at her with his head still lowered and was surprised. She didn’t look at him in a judging way, neither did she have a disgusted expression on her face, no, she seemed amused but in a good way. “So… you have a huge crush on me, huh?”, she asked and tilted her head slightly, the amused smile didn’t leave her face. Y/N was always a pretty confident person, she enjoyed having people around her that looked at her in the way Chan does, she knew that she already has him wrapped around her finger. Chan just blushed even harder and quickly nodded as he lowered his gaze again. “Cute.”, she simply said and giggled slightly as she pushed her hair back. Chan blushed even more and was about to speak up when she suddenly took a step towards his direction, she now was much closer to him and he held his breath as he looked at her. “.. you know, if you want to take me on a date you have to ask me for my number first..”, she simply said as she looked at him with an innocent look on her face which just made her seem even mire angelic than she already was. Chan just stared at her dumbfounded for a few seconds until he quickly tried to get his phone out of his pocket, still trembling. “Ca-Can I have your number?”, he asked nervously as he looked at her which just made her chuckle, she simply took his phone out of his hands and slightly brushed his fingers which made his heart jump a little once again. She was typing in something and then handed it back to him. “Text me later about the details!”, she simply said while smiling at him, she then checked her watch and noticed that she had to leave if she wanted to be to her class on time, so she got going. “See you later Chan!”, she exclaimed after she winked at him which just made him blush even more if that was possible, he just nodded quickly and waved awkwardly which just made her smile even brighter and then walk away. He just stood there in the middle of the corridor as he watched her leave, he then looked at his phone to see that she had saved her number into it. He couldn’t believe that that just had happened so he just kept staring at his phone until he was suddenly hugged from behind. “You little motherfucker really did it, oh my god, halfway through your speech I thought that she’d run away but then she took your PHONE and gave you her NUMBER, dude, you have a date!”, Seungkwan said way too excitedly as he shook him around, Vernon was just typing in stuff in his phone which later turned out that he texted in the group chat that Chan had a date with Y/N, everyone was going crazy and Chans’ heart still didn’t slow down, instead he suddenly had a big smile on his face and bit his lower lip. “She… She gave me her number…”, he just mumbled and Seungkwan nodded his head. “She did!! She maybe gave you a fake number though… which I doubt, you should definitely text her though.”, “Really? I thought I’d just keep her number as a souvenir.”, Chan dryly said with a smirk on his lips. “Hey, don’t be so cocky, literally 40 seconds ago you were a blushy, stuttering mess.”, “Still got her number though.”, he just said with a shrug and then made his way to his next class, mind you that the big smile didn’t leave his face once throughout the rest of the day.

During his classes in the afternoon he wasn’t able to focus whatsoever, the only thing on his mind was Y/N, he was thinking about what to text her, where to take her, what to say, he was thinking through every possibility and got a shaky heart as he was doing so. After his classes were over he quickly made his way home with Vernon and Seungkwan who were loudly nagging about how fast he was walking and about how he should calm down, Chan didn’t even properly listen nor care, he just wanted to get home and text y/n finally, so he did. Once he said goodbye to his friends he quickly changed into more comfortable clothes and sat down on his bed. His roommates Jeonghan and Soonyoung still weren’t home so he was able to calm down first before going on imessage to type out his message to Y/N, he really didn’t need two guys beside him asking him about every detail and telling him which emojis to use and not to use, that would only make him even more nervous than he already was. He thought about maybe not texting her yet though, he was scared that he might seem too eager, but he never really was that much of a patient person so he decided to text her then and there. ‘I mean… if my awkward speech didn’t scare her off, nothing will’ he told himself as he typed out the message.

‘Hi, this is Chan, that awkward guy that asked you out haha… yeah let’s please never talk about that again, I just wanted to ask you when you’re free?”

He read over his message about 30 times until he finally sent it and immediately threw his phone away like it suddenly gave him a shock. He then stood up and walked around in his room to find something that would distract him. His hands were a little shaky and his heart was pounding. He was about to start gaming a little when suddenly he heard his phone vibrating, in an immense speed he was back on his bed and opened his phone so he could read the notification.

‘Hi! (: tbh, I’m basically free all the time, what about tonight?’

Chan looked at the message for a few minutes and then took a deep breath. ‘That’s way too soon, I’m not ready, this goes to fast, I need to mentally and physically prepare myself, I can’t just meet her tonight’, he thought to himself as he typed out a message,

‘Yeah sure! Whenever you want haha! Uh… well, what do you wanna do?’

Chan closed his eyes for a few seconds and sighed audibly. ‘Wow, well done’. He didn’t have enough time to actually get up again and turn on his TV since his phone vibrated again a few seconds after, he wanted to act cool and not open it immediately but he just couldn’t help it and opened the message immediately (which may or may not have made y/n giggle slightly).

‘So eager… well, apparently, it’ll rain tonight, but what about meeting at mine, we could cook and watch a movie? (:”

And that’s the point where Chan froze for a few seconds, he read through that message again and again to make sure that he didn’t misunderstand or misread anything. His crush of two years just invited him over to cook and watch a movie, this either was a really realistic dream or she was just messing with him, there was no logical explanation for it.

‘yeah, sre, Imean, why not, I lvoe food and movies nd like, youknow, not being n the rain, yeah thatss totally fine… sure! Arsjnd what time shodcd I come? Shossduld I bring somdjcing<’

He sent the text way too fast and once again cringed over the mistakes he made due to his way too shaky fingers. He was on the verge of having a heart attack, if you’d feel his pulse, you’d think that he had been sprinting for hours. Y/N on the other side was at home casually going through her Instagram feed and waiting for his answers, she was glad that he wasn’t that kind of guy that wouldn’t reply for hours just to seem more ‘interesting’, she enjoyed talking to someone who replied fast and was eager to talk to her, she would be lying if she said that this whole situation didn’t amuse her. She was already really soft for this boy and just had to smile whenever she thought about the situation in the hallway today. She didn’t expect someone to confess their feelings to her, or at least not in such an adorable way. Not only did she think that he was probably the most adorable little guy on earth, she also was weirdly attracted to him, just everything about him spoke to her on a different level and she really wanted to get to know him better. Once Chan texted back a little slower than usual, she read through his text and chuckled softly at the typos in his text, poor boy probably got really nervous when she offered him to hang out at hers.

‘I think I’ve got everything.. I’ll text you my address, be here around 7 maybe?’

She sent the text and smiled at the fast response she got.

‘Sure! Sounds perfect! I’ll be there!’

Y/N looked at the time which showed her that she had around three hours to get ready, so she stood up and went to take a shower and later on cleaned up a little, Chan on the other side was going crazy. He immediately went to take a shower to calm down his nerves which actually made it worse since he had no distraction and too much time to think about what could possibly go wrong so he quickly got out of the shower again and dried himself off while thinking about what he should wear. He opened the doors of his closet and looked through every single piece of clothing he had. Should he wear a shirt? A t-shirt? Black jeans? Denim Jeans? Trainers? He was stressing himself way too much, he didn’t even notice when Soonyoung came home and got into his room until he spoke up and scared Chan to death. “So, you’re going on a date?”, “Oh my god you scared me so much.”, Chan simply said and completely ignored his question. “Oh, sorry, so, you’re going on a date?”, “No I’m stressing about what to wear at home because I wanna look good for you hyung.”, he answered with a way too sarcastic tone in his voice which made Soonyoung laugh who was currently sitting on Chans’ bed. “Wow, that’s really cute of you.”, he replied, and Chan once again ignored him. “Shirt or t-shirt?”, Chan asked as he turned to Soonyoung who just raised his eyebrows. “You were ignoring my questions but expect me to answer YOURS?”, “Yes.”, “… t-shirt, a shirt is too formal.”, Soonyoung simply replied and Chan nodded as he took out a gray t-shirt. “Really? That one?”, Soonyoung asked suddenly which made Chan look at him with big eyes. “What? Why? Does it look weird?”, “I don’t know… try the black one”, Soonyoung replied as he watched Chan getting dressed, he had a weird fatherly moment as he was watching him, he felt like he raised this child and suddenly he’d go on a date and do adult stuff? “Better?”, Chan suddenly asked and made Soonyoung look up at him. “Yeah, casual but not too casual! Wait are you guys gonna go out to eat or?”, “She… she invited me over.”, Chan said with a little blush on his cheeks which made Soonyoung chuckle. “Damn, you know what that means…”, “No, it’s just cooking and eating and watching a movie, nothing more, nothing less.”, Chan exclaimed which made Soonyoung laugh even more. “Alright, wanna bet on it again?”, “… no, I’ll never bet on anything again.”, Chan shyly replied as he looked through his trousers. Soonyoung simply stood up and made his way to the door to go to the kitchen to get some food. “Go for some gray sweatpants, they’re easier to get off.”, he simply said before leaving the room which made Chan blush even harder. “We will not- whatever…”, he simply said as he looked at the gray sweatpants in front of him, he decided to put them on, not because of the reasoning that was stated by Soonyoung, but because they would be at hers’ so sweatpants would be more comfortable. It was only 5:30 pm when he was done with getting ready, so he decided to go to the living room and just watch Soonyoung play some stupid game. After a while he decided to play against him, and he never sucked this badly at any videogame ever. “Wow… you’re really nervous, huh?”, Soonyoung simply stated which made Chan roll his eyes. “No… maybe a little bit…”, “Are you gonna buy her something?”, Soonyoung asked casually as he took a sip of his soda. “I don’t know… maybe… should I?”, Chan asked nervously which made Soonyoung laugh. “Okay, you’re really damn nervous… maybe buy her some chocolate?”, “You mean those 20 dollar big packs of chocolate?”, “I love your enthusiasm but think a little smaller maybe…”, Soonyoung said amused as he started a new game (Soonyoung won 13:0 and he has never been more proud in his life.). Chan was happy that he got some distraction, the next time he looked at the time it was already 6:30 pm so he stood up and got ready by checking himself out for a long time and fixing every single streak of hair. He then got his phone, wallet, said bye to Soonyoung and promised him to ‘not do something he wouldn’t do’ (which was basically giving him permission to do EVERYTHING, Sooynoung really was a wild one) and with that he left the small apartment and got his bike. On his way to y/n he only stopped by some store to get pralines for her, at exactly 6:59 pm he was in front of her apartment complex and took a deep breath. He tried to calm himself down before ringing the bell and just told himself that it couldn’t be that bad. After a few seconds he was able to open the door and get inside the building. He slowly made his way to the elevator and pressed the button to get to the 6th floor where Y/Ns’ apartment was. He was sure that he has never been as nervous in his life as he was when he was standing in front of her door. ‘There’s no turning back now’, he though to himself as he took a deep breath one last time until he lightly knocked on the door. He heard steps coming closer and closer and his heart beating faster and faster until the door was suddenly opened and y/n was standing in front of him with a big sweatshirt which reached to the middle of her thighs and which would’ve made her look even prettier and softer than usual, but since it seemed like she only wore shorts under that sweatshirt it only made her appear even hotter. “Hi Chan! You’re right on time!”, she immediately said with a big smile as she pulled him inside the apartment where it was definitely warmer than outside. “Ah… yeah, you know it’s… I like to be on time and not let people wait for.. you know, me and just.. yeah uh… hi.”, Chan was tripping over his words as he was trying to form a proper sentence without sounding like a complete idiot. “That’s good! I hate it when people make me wait.”, she simply replied as she waited for him to take off his shoes and jacket. Chan quickly got out of his shoes and neatly placed them on the floor where y/ns’ shoes were, he then took off his jacket and hoped that she wouldn’t notice that he was shaking. “Oh, you’re cold?”, she suddenly asked as she was looking at him with big eyes, he quickly looked up to her after he had hung up his jacket and then just shook his head. “Ah, yeah no just… a little but it’s pretty warm in here so that’s good… oh I uh, I also got those for you..”, he pulled out the box filled with chocolate and blushed lightly as he saw how a smile was formed on her lips. “That’s adorable, thank you so much.”, she said and took the box from his hands, she then turned around and walked towards a room which seemed to be the living room, she indicated him to follow her which he immediately did. “Feel like at home.”, he arrived in the living room and looked around a little. The place was pretty clean and rather small which made it seem homier. There were lots of pictures on the wall of people he had never seen and of y/n, he liked it there a lot, it already made him feel less nervous which was good, since he felt like his heart might have exploded any second. “It’s pretty here…”, Chan quietly said and had a little smile on his face because he finally was able to say something without stuttering, he was proud of himself. “Oh, thank you! It honestly is a mess, but I try to, you know, make it work.”, she said as she entered the living room where Chan was still standing. “I thought we could cook kimchi fried rice?”, she suggested, and Chan just nodded his head, she could’ve said anything, and he would’ve been alright with it. “Sure!”, he exclaimed and followed her to the kitchen, which was rather small though it was alright for two people to be in it but it seemed like it would be hard to fit in more than three people. “I’ll prepare the rice, are you okay with cutting the kimchi?”, “Sure!”, he immediately replied as he got closer to her and took some of the kimchi which made her smile. “Cute…”, she just mumbled under her breath which made Chan nearly drop the kimchi. She just giggled as she watched his face heating up once again. “You sure do blush really easily, huh?”, she asked with a smirk as she got a pot. Chan just scratched his neck awkwardly as he nodded. “I guess you have that effect on me.”, he simply stated quietly which made her smile at him knowingly. “Good to know.”, she said as she filled up the pot with water, Chan just looked at her with big eyes, not really knowing what to do. Y/n noticed that after a while and gave him a pair of scissors, accidentally touching his hand a little longer than expected which made his heart jump lightly, her hand was warm and soft and he wondered what it would be like to hold her hand. “The kimchi won’t cut its’ self”, she stated which tore Chan out of his thoughts who quickly started cutting the kimchi. While the rice was cooking, they were able to finally get into a proper conversation and it went much better than Chan expected. He blushed a little here and there and some stutters were showing up but overall, he did a great job in not making a fool of himself, he even made her laugh a couple of times which was a huge deal for him. They were pretty involved in the conversation and completely forgot about the rice until the water overflew and made a huge mess, but they didn’t take it too seriously but rather laughed it off. “I guess you should focus better…”, Chan said jokingly as he helped her clean up. “I guess you just distract me.”, she said with her eyebrows raised while looking at Chan who was speechless and with a dumbfounded expression on his face. “But I forgive you…”, she quickly added while giggling and made her way to the sink, the thing is that she had to pass Chan to do so which resulted into them being way too close for some seconds. Y/n used the opportunity to just smile at him but Chan immediately looked away and tried to not focus on how close she was and on how pretty she looked up close.

“Do I make you nervous Chan?”, she didn’t ask that question in a seductive way, nor did she even look at him while asking, the way she asked that question was like you’d ask about the weather, it seemed like such an innocent question but the smile on her face gave it away. Chan just bit his lip as his heart was beating faster again, he was struggling to find the right words until Y/n had to pass him again to get to the stove where she’d combine the ingredients to finish up the fried rice. She passed him again, but this time a little slower, she even stopped right in front of him and tilted her head slightly, exposing her neck to him ‘accidentally’. Chan just stared at her eyes and lips, not able to form a sentence, his head was basically blank, the only thing he could think of was his lips on her neck. Before he could properly calm down, she passed him though and continued cooking. “I take that as a yes.”, she said with an amused expression on her face. Chan tried to calm himself down a little as he went through his hair a few times, he really didn’t expect her to have this power over him. It took her six words to make his heart and head go crazy, he didn’t know what would happen if she actually chose to touch him properly, even the thought of it made his cheeks blush even harder. “Let’s eat, I’m so hungry!”, Y/N exclaimed happily like nothing happened and took the two plates while Chan grabbed two glasses for them and made his way to the living room where they’d be eating while watching a movie they had chosen before, it was some thriller which sounded interesting but no matter how hard Chan tried, he just wasn’t able to focus on the movie whatsoever. Y/N seemed pretty involved in the movie and didn’t seem like she was affected by Chan, little did he know that he was the only thing she was thinking of. She loved teasing him, she loved his reactions, the way he blushed and shyly looked at her like she was the prettiest person on earth, she loved the power she had over him and she enjoyed every second of it. “The food was-was really good!”, Chan said after he had finished his plate which made Y/n smile slightly and turn to him. “We’re a good team.”, she said and finished her food too, she took the plates and put them into the dish washer, luckily they had already cleaned up most of the kitchen so she didn’t have to care too much about that. Once she was back, she didn’t sit on her usual place, much to Chan’s surprise she sat down right next to him which made him tense up a little. He only had to move a little bit and their legs would be touching, her hand was right next to his leg but not touching him in any way but that was enough for him to stare at her hand for a few seconds, wondering if she’d actually touch him or not. Y/n noticed his stare but chose to act like she didn’t know, she kept on watching the movie as she pushed her hair back, her sweater slipped a little which now meant that her shoulder and neck was exposed. Chan quickly looked away and failed at calming down his poor heart, ‘does she know what she’s doing to me?’, he asked himself as he once again tried to focus on the movie, he even succeeded on focusing for a little until he suddenly felt y/ns’ warm hand on his thigh, right above his knee. He tensed up even more and had a hard time breathing. Y/n was simply enjoying that whole situation, she knew what she was doing. She didn’t really go up with her hand yet, she just let it rest there and bit her lip as she felt the muscles and imagined what it would be like to sit on his lap. She licked over her lips as she started caressing his thigh a little, still with her eyes glued to the TV. Chan was going crazy in the meantime, the only thing he could do was watching her hand helplessly and breathing a little harder, he was about to speak up when she suddenly took her hand away to grab her glass like nothing had happened, which nearly made Chan let out a disappointed sigh. He pouted a little as he stared at the tv. “Already so needy?”, Y/n suddenly asked as she turned her head to look at Chan with her eyebrows raised, Chan’s heart skipped a beat as he looked at her with big eyes. He looked like a lost puppy which made y/n bite her lip as she put down her glass again. “Look Chan, I need you to answer my question…”, she said as she turned her whole body towards him, Chan just helplessly stared at her and opened his mouth and closed it right after. She giggled softly as she leaned over his lap to reach for the remote, her sweater slipped up a little and exposed her shorts, Chan couldn’t help it but stare at her, he blushed when he noticed that he was already a little hard, he immediately looked away from her. Y/n put the movie on pause and sat back up still looking at Chan who was avoiding her stare. “Fine.”, she suddenly said, Chan frowned a little until he suddenly felt her legs on each side of his legs and her face facing him, she was sitting on his lap and put her hands on his shoulder close to his neck. Chan breathed in shakily and didn’t even dare to look at her, let alone touch her. His heart was racing. He suddenly felt two warm fingers under his chin which softly indicated him to look at the beautiful devil in front of him. “Look at me…”, she whispered softly, and he did. He looked at her with big eyes and a little pout, obviously overwhelmed with the situation, y/n simply put on a smile on her face as she softly traced a visible vein on his neck with her thumb which made Chan shiver softly. “You’re really pretty when you’re needy.”, she whispered after leaning in slightly. Their lips were really close, Chan would only have to lean in for their lips to touch, but instead he was just staring at her lips, waiting for her to kiss him, but she didn’t, instead she had a big grin on her face and just looked at him expectedly. “Do you want to kiss me?”, she asked innocently and giggled softly at the eager nod she received. “Then why don’t you ask?”, Chan looked into her eyes shyly and back to her lips. “Can… can I-I kiss you?”, he asked with a shaky voice and a blushy face. Y/n just nodded slightly and in no seconds, she felt his lips on hers. Chans’ heart was beating fast and his stomach was going crazy, the skin under her fingers was tingling he was ready to do anything she wanted. The kiss was soft at first, he was shyly moving his lips against hers, it wasn’t the first time he had kissed a girl, but he had never felt this way before, he was basically burning. The kiss started getting more and more heated and their tongues were fighting for dominance, none of them were surprised at the outcome, Y/N had the power over the situation, she decided what would happen next. While they were kissing, he felt her hands on his’, she took his hands and gently placed them on her own hips, allowing him to touch her. Once his hands were on her hips he let out a muffled moan which made her smile against his lips. She suddenly leaned back a little causing their lips to part which made Chan whine softly and stare at her with a pout which had a huge effect on her, she definitely could get used to his whines and red lips and the desperate expression on his face. “P-please…”, he suddenly said desperately as he tried to kiss her once again which only made her giggle softly and distance herself a little more so he couldn’t kiss her. “No, no, no baby… that’s not how it works…”, she simply said as she leaned in and started kissing his neck softly which made him tilt his head slightly so she could kiss him better, Chan had a hard time repressing his moans under her, he was biting his lip and basically clinging to her, her lips on his neck were making him go crazy, so it was no surprise that Chan pouted even more when she stopped again. “Look baby, I want to hear the pretty sounds you make so don’t even think about repressing them.”, she sternly whispered into his ear which made shivers go down his spine as he eagerly nodded. “Y-yes, sorry I’m-“, he was interrupted by her lips on his neck once again, this time biting the soft skin softly and sucking on the red skin which quickly turned into a pretty little mark, in the meantime Chan was desperately trying to get some friction, just some touch, something to satisfy him, but she didn’t let him move one inch. She simply shook her head whenever he would try. “Such a needy boy…”, she would simply say. Chan was desperate for touch, his hands weren’t resting still anymore, his hands were desperately caressing her hips, trying to somehow pull off her sweater which made her chuckle. “No baby, you have to ask first.”, she simply said after distancing herself again and staring at him. “Can I-can I please take off you-your sweater? Please?”, he’d say with a big pout and whiny voice which would only cause her to get wetter. “You can take off my sweater baby.”, she softly said and giggled at how eagerly he obeyed, he immediately grabbed her sweater with shaky hands and pulled it off, leaving her with her shorts and bra only. Chan stared at her in awe as if she was the prettiest person on earth, y/n bit her lip as she pushed her hair back to fully expose herself. “Let’s go to my room.”, she suddenly said, this time with a shaky voice too, Chan just nodded and followed her with shaky legs as they went into her room. Once they arrived y/n simply pushed Chan towards the bed where he immediately sat down and stared up to her. “Get your shirt off.”, she demanded to which he immediately obeyed, he struggled a little to get his shirt off, he was way too shaky and aroused to think properly which made her smile softly but once he had his shirt off she came closer and looked down at him. “Such a pretty boy…”, she said and sat down on his lap once again, but this time she moved up a little and bit her lip as she felt his hard member through his sweatpants. Chan blushed furiously as a small moan left his lips due to the friction. “Already so hard for me, huh?”, she asked teasingly as she started to move her hips against his which only caused him to moan even more. She kept on doing that until she felt him desperately moving against her too, she immediately stopped her movements and just shook her head. “What did I say before? Good boys ask before they do something, and you’re a good boy right?”, she asked as she stood up in front of him to get her shorts off, now standing there with only her black lace underwear covering parts of her body. Chan whined softly at the words and the sight in front of him, he eagerly nodded after a while as he was staring at her with teary eyes. “Y-yes, I’m a good boy, please I’m-“, “Please what baby?”, she asked as she pushed him, indicating him to lay down properly on the bed. “Please let me-let me touch you? Please I’m- can I please make you feel good? Please, I’ll be a good boy.”, he desperately said as he stared up to her with a big pout and big eyes, she licked over her lips as she sat down onto the bed, at this point she was dripping wet and desperate for touch too, so she nodded quickly and laid down where Chan was laying before, he was now on top of her and really close to her lips. “Can-Can I kiss you? Please?”, he asked with a shaky voice to which y/n only replied with a nod, the kiss was rather harsh and fast, she basically felt how needy he was. His hands were all over her and he was whining against her lips. Once their lips parted he immediately started kissing her neck softly while her hands were in his hair guiding him down, he immediately obeyed and kissed down her neck, to her collarbone and then over her stomach to her panties. Y/N bit her lip as he went in between her thighs to kiss and caress them, she sighed softly as he was kissing her everywhere but never there where she actually wanted it, Chan used his position on top of her to finally do what she had been doing for the past 30 minutes, he was teasing her but little did he know that she was still in charge of the situation. “Don’t tease.”, she suddenly said while looking down at him really sternly, he immediately got goosebumps as he eagerly nodded his head. “Can I please… get your panties off?”, he asked pleadingly, she just nodded her head as she lifted up the bottom part of her body so he could undress her properly which he immediately did. She chuckled a little at the sight. “Such a needy boy…”, she said as she guided his head in between her legs. Once his lips were on her private parts, she threw her head back and closed her eyes, she whined softly when she felt that Chan was moaning against her lips. Chan was eager to please her and immediately started pleasing her, whenever he would get a praise he’d just whine softly and try even harder to make her cum but before that could happen she pulled on his hair indicating him to come up to her and kiss her which he eagerly did. The kiss was harsh, a lot of sucking and biting, Chan was a moaning mess once she turned them around and was over him kissing him demandingly. She was pulling on his hair and straddling his lap, she was pressing their hips together and muffled his sounds with her lips. “Such a good boy…”, she’d whisper in between kisses to which Chan would nod his head eagerly. Once she instructed him to get off his sweat pants he did it immediately and exposed himself, whining due to the sudden coldness hitting his hot member. Y/n got off her bra slowly as she stared into his eyes, Chan stared and sighed softly. “Fuck… you’re so beautiful…”, he whispered which would only make her smirk and reach down. Once she was palming him over his underwear he was closing his eyes and moaning softly due to the friction, the view was incredible. Chans’ hair was a mess, his lips were red and swollen and his neck was covered in marks she had left, he was desperately trying to touch her and pushing against her hand to get more pleasure but she just took her hand away from his member and took his hands. “I want you to keep your hands over your head like this the whole time. Don’t even dare to do anything unless I tell you to.”, she stated which made Chan whine loudly and nod, he immediately put his hands behind his head and breathed in shakily as she continued to palm him over his underwear. “Now tell me baby, what do you want.”, she asked as she slowly pulled down his underwear to fully expose his hard member. “Please I- just…”, Chan couldn’t form a proper sentence, he was basically begging for more friction and some pleasure. “Please what baby?”, she teasingly said as she started stroking his member slowly and softly which wasn’t enough for Chan who was desperately whining under her touch. “Y/N, please can I- can I fuck you? Please I-I’ve been a good boy please…”, y/n chuckled softly at his words and started adding more pressure to her touch and going a little faster which caused him to moan a little louder. “Is that so?”, “Yes! Please, I’ll fuck you good, I promise just, please can I? Please?”, he was begging at this point and y/n loved every second of it. He was a moaning desperate little mess under her. She started stroking him harder and faster which made him whine and hold on to the bedframe behind him, he really wanted to touch her, to claim her, he just wanted to cum. She kept on going like that for a while until she realized that he was about to cum, right at that moment she simply stopped, but still had his member in her hand, Chan whined loudly and was about to push into her hand when she took it away completely. “You’re only gonna cum with my permission, do you understand?”, she asked harshly as she sat down right onto his dick and rubbed herself on it which made him moan out her name and nod eagerly. “Good boy.”, she moaned softly as she reached to the drawer to get out a condom. Chan bit his lip as he looked at her getting the condom out and slipping it on his dick which made him whimper softly. “Say it again, beg for it.”, she demanded which made Chan whimper. “Please let me fuck you, please I’ll be your good boy, please, please, please let me make you feel good, I’ll be good I promise.”, he desperately said which made her bite her lip as she positioned his dick so it could slip inside of her. She moaned softly as she sat down and took half of his member, Chan threw his head back as he softly whined, he was a moaning mess once his whole member was inside of her. She didn’t move at first, she wanted to see if he’d obey to her, she wanted to see if he’d move without her permission, which he didn’t, so she pushed herself up and sat down again, slowly fucking herself on his dick. “Please y/n, can I- can I please touch you? Please?”, he begged under her as she kept going, still incredibly slow. It took her all her willpower to not just fuck herself on him properly, she wanted him to suffer. “Not yet baby boy”, she simply said as she started to go a little faster, she was holding onto his shoulders to get a grip as she was moving up and down, positioning herself on him in a way which would bring her the most pleasure, meanwhile Chan was a whimpering mess, begging her to finally go harder. After a while she couldn’t take it anymore so she started to fuck herself onto him even faster and harder than before, softly moaning his name whenever he’d hit the right spot, whenever she’d feel him get closer to cuming she’d slow down again and earn disappointed whimpers which only made her go harder after. Suddenly she let his dick slip out of her completely which made Chan nearly cry due to the loss of friction. He pushed his hips into the air, desperately looking for some friction. Y/N got off him and laid down with her legs spread looking at Chan. “Fuck me. Now.”, she harshly said which made Chan whimper and get in between her legs shakily. His heart was pounding and all he could think of was y/n and how badly he wanted to cum, so he obeyed and didn’t waste any seconds to push right into her. He started fucking her at a slow pace at first which only caused y/n to pull on his hair and demand to go faster if he wanted to cum that night, being the good boy he was, he started fucking her faster and harder. The room was filled with Chan’s whimpers, y/n’s moans and the slapping wet sound of Chan fucking into her hard and fast. “Please, p-please can I cum? Please?”, he begged loudly as he was kissing her neck harshly while fucking into her even faster. “You have to make me cum too if you want to cum.”, she simply stated as she pulled his hair to finally get to kiss him again and moan against his lips. Chan shakily reached down with one hand and started rubbing her in between her legs while he was still fucking her, the sweet moans of y/n only made him even hornier and he immediately came after she gave him the permission to do so, moaning out ‘thank yous’ and her name while he was uncontrollably fucking her, she immediately came after he did and moaned his name and praised him over and over again. After a few minutes Chan was trying to catch his breath and laid on top of her, too exhausted to move which would make her giggle softly. “You have to get off me for a second baby…”, she simply said which made him pout and whimper softly, but he obeyed and pulled his soft member out of her and laid down next to her. He threw the condom away into the trashcan next to her bed and then looked at her with big eyes as she stood up. “Where-Where are you going?”, he asked, still in his sub mode and depending on her, once she noticed that she softly patted his hair and smiled at him. “I’ll just get some towels to clean us up and some water, don’t worry, I’ll be right back.”, she softly said and kissed his cheek as she made her way to the kitchen after putting on her underwear and a big shirt. She quickly grabbed everything she needed and made her way to the bedroom where Chan was waiting for her to come back, her heart trembled slightly due to his face lighting up once she entered the room, she definitely was whipped for him. “Here baby, drink some water okay?”, she softly said as she was cleaning him up carefully, he obeyed and drank the whole glass of water in one go. She then handed him his underwear and t-shirt so he’d feel more comfortable but he took it the wrong way and looked at her with big sad eyes. “You… you want me to leave?”, he asked with a voice which nearly made her tear up, he sounded so hurt and sad. She immediately shook her head and sat down next to him and pulled him into her arms. “No baby, you can sleep here… maybe we should get some breakfast together tomorrow?”, she asked which made Chan smile brightly and nod his head exhaustedly. They continued talking for a little until he couldn’t keep his eyes open anymore and slept in with her pretty voice whispering sweet nothings into his ear.

“So, how was it?”, was the first question that was asked once he entered his shared apartment. His whole friend group was sitting in the living room, staring at him and just waiting for a detailed answer. “Well… let’s just say that I should definitely lose more bets”, he simply said as he sat down next to Soonyoung with the biggest smirk ever. “You lucky bastard.”, Seungkwan said after a while which made him laugh and nod, he indeed was a lucky bastard.

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