#just like a confirmation of what the other person already knows
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Marauders - Moving In
i'll probably do a second part, but lemme know if you wanna see it. I haven't really got to explore Remus in this one, so maybe more in the next one! hope you enjoy! warnings: mention of Y/N, female reader descriptions
pairing: marauders x reader (slow burn)
part 2
Sitting on your parents couch, you scrolled through craigslist, desperate to find a roommate. God you were sick of being in your parents house. It’s not that you didn’t love them, no, but after a while you began to crave the independence that only being away from home can give you, and distance makes the heart grow fonder. Which is when you finally came along one post. The apartment was only a little bits away, and had 3 roommates looking for a 4th. Viewing the profile that posted the listing, you noted the boy's name was James, and he had 2 roommates, Sirius and Remus.
Tossing it up in your head, you realised you were desperate enough, and quickly sent a text to the number listed. Within the minute, he responded, requesting to meet at a diner nearby tomorrow to confirm, in his words “you weren’t a 75 year old weirdo.” You agree to be fair, what if this guy was some creep? It was set, tomorrow night, at 5:00, you would meet James and Remus, as according to James, Sirius was busy with a gig.
So that's where you are now. Standing outside of this retro themed dinner, its bright red exterior and interior makes you wonder why you had never found this place by yourself. Entering, you were escorted to a booth in the corner, the waitress had told you were the first to arrive. So you sat, for 10 minutes, before the little above the door rung, and you looked up at 2 boys, one quite a bit taller than the other. The waitress smiled, and pointed them towards your location, and suddenly you felt nervous. They were both quite attractive, and you began to consider maybe you should have dressed better.
‘Y/N? Hi, it’s nice to meet you! I’m James, and this is Remus.” James, you noted, had curly brown hair, with round glasses, and was wearing a red button up shirt, but the first 3 buttons were undone. Your gaze then turned to Remus, who towered over you, and you noted the small scars on his face, before deciding to ignore them. He was wearing a super comfy sweater, that was dark browns and greens. Quickly, you cleared your throat. “Hi! It’s nice to meet you both!” You quickly offered your hand to the two, and they scooted into the both. The three of you ordered burgers, and each got a milkshake. James maintained the most of the conversation, you noted Remus appeared a bit nervous, and you noted the closeness of the two.
“Now, we would love to have you move into our apartment, but we just have on warning to give.” You tilted your head slightly, this meeting had gone great, James was charismatic, Remus was kind enough if a bit silent, but you assumed that was just a new person thing. “The three of us, me, Remus and Sirius, are in a relationship. I completely understand if you are uncomfortable, but we really enjoyed talking to you and you seem like a great fit.” You laughed a little, before stating you had no problem, and to be honest, you really just needed to get a space to live. So it was settled, you would move in within the week.
You bought only the basics, as they said they already had a double bed for you, so you decided you would move in any other furniture later. Quickly approaching the door, you knocked, before being met with a head of ruly black hair. “Hey! You must be Y/N! James, she’s here!” You could hear a yell, a trip, before you saw James enter the room. Sirius was almost exclusively decked out in leather, the jacket and his pants being completely black. Finally, his t-shirt featured an AC DC decal. James quickly ran over to the door, offering to grab the box in your hands.
Quickly shuffling you inside of the apartment, they lead you to your room. It was bare, of course, but you noted the desk in the corner, and the bed under the window, pushed up against the wall, making almost half of the room your bed. “So, Y/N, tell me, what music do you enjoy?” You quickly turned around, being pulled out of your own world, and realising Sirius had followed you in. “Uh… Rock and pop, I guess.” You watched a cocky smile appear on his face, the lip piercing moving upwards. “Sick! I play in a rock band, and we are performing at a pub tonight. Would you wanna come watch? James and Remus will be coming as well, and as our roommates, we gotta make sure you know what we do, you know?”
“Are you sure? I wouldn’t wanna impose.” Sirius quickly grabbed you by the shoulders, shaking you lightly. “You're kidding, right? You literally live with us now, I mean, we’ll essentially be sharing a bathroom, you could never impose by watching me do what I love!” You guessed that was true, so you unpacked the boxes you bought, which held all your clothes, and the bare necessities, such as your toothbrush, sheets, hairbrush etc. Unpacking was fun, seeing all the clothes you had forgotten you’d bought, considering what to wear to the pub.
Deciding on a dress, a deep red, somewhat short, laying a leather jacket above it, with some doc martens, you were ready for what would hopefully be a fun night.
#marauders x reader#marauders#james potter#sirius black#remus lupin#james potter x reader#sirius black x reader#remus lupin x reader#x reader#self insert
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Anything
Another mugging fic!
David&Babe
tw: mugging, light angst, friendship developing, pack feels, pack dynamics
Anything
They hadn’t called him.
He’d gotten a call from the Department about an incident with one of his pack. He’d rolled his eyes at first and nodded, waiting for another report about some conflict Darlin or Chrissy had gotten into. It wasn’t that the others weren’t possibilities, it was just that Milo would have told him before the Department and Asher was out of town.
But then they dropped a name he’d never heard the Department mention to him before, not since he confirmed them being in his pack. His heart squeezed in his chest. Mugged? What the fuck did they mean mugged?
“Where are they?” He was already out the door, keys in hand.
“What?”
“Where?”
“Oh, um. It looks like they checked themself out of the hospital after making a statement to the unempowered authorities… It doesn’t look like they broke covert although the report does suggest the assailant was empowered…”
David felt sick, teeth too long and hand shaking around his keys. It was too much information at once, all tossed out carelessly by this desk clerk on the phone like none of it even mattered. Hospital. They had been taken to the hospital? What the fuck had happened? And who had mugged them? And why, in the hell, did this asshole think David gave any fucks about covert?
“How injured were they?” he interrupted. They’d been taken to a hospital, but they seem to have left on their own. David wanted to find comfort in that detail but he couldn’t, because he knew for a fact that Babe could and would push through pain and illness. They would sooner walk home with a broken leg than ask someone for help and risk being a burden.
Fuck! Now he was worried they were walking around on a broken leg.
“Um… It looks like they were treated for some cuts and scrapes. There’s a note about a possible concussion but the doctor didn’t seem overly worried.” And the empowered clerk on the phone didn’t sound worried either.
“Cuts?”
“And scrapes.”
David ground his teeth. “What makes you say the assailant was probably empowered?”
“Oh. There’s a note about them being bitten. They kept their story pretty vague though,” he sounded pleased and then huffed a smile. “The unempowered doctors gave them antibiotics in case of an infection.”
David hung up. He had to. If he didn’t, he would somehow kill this person through the phone. He immediately dialed another number, sliding into the driver’s seat of his truck. He put the phone on the dash and started the engine. It didn’t take Milo long to answer. “Boss?”
David hesitated just when he was about to speak. Babe was pack but they were human and they were so private.
“David?” Milo was louder, closer to his phone and focused with concern.
“I’m going to need your help, but I need you and Stealth to keep it quite.” It never even occurred to him to ask Milo to keep anything from his partner.
“There was an incident with Babe. I’m headed to their apartment now. I need you to find out everything you can from the department.” He took a turn and pulled into an alley beside their building, not caring if he was in a loading zone.
“Yeah. On it. Are they okay?”
“I don’t know,” he said without thinking and froze just as he was getting out of his truck.
He didn’t know.
His instincts raged, his wolf rolling under his skin. He didn’t know. A member of his pack—the most important person in the world to his best friend—and he had no idea.
“I’ll get back to you.” He hung up and used Asher’s spare key to get into the building. He couldn’t wait for the lift, taking the stairs two at a time. It wasn’t until he was in the hall that he knew something was wrong, something other than everything else wrong, but he couldn’t put his finger on it until he was at their apartment door.
He knocked, but already his stomach was twisting because his senses told him they weren’t there. Not only was their apartment empty, but their scent was so faint in the hallway that he knew they hadn’t been there in hours, probably not since they left for work that morning, definitely not with any cuts.
Cuts.
Bites.
His skin crawled and he wanted to growl and whine at the same time. He needed to see them. He needed to know how bad this was and do everything he could to fix it.
He scrolled his phone numbers and tried to call them. It went immediately to voicemail.
“Fuck,” he pushed the heel of his palm against his temple. Did they even have their phone? Where would they be?
He could have the pack find them. If they fanned out, they’d have them in no time. But then he would be making this moment, this day—their day—pack public. And he didn’t know yet if that was okay with them.
Asher hadn’t called him yet. Which meant, either they were on the phone with him right now, or he didn’t know yet.
David needed eyes on Babe. He needed to be able to tell Asher he was looking at them and that they were okay, or he would lose his mind.
He tried to think up places Babe would go on his way down the stairs.
Where would he go if he was unempowered and recently attacked by a vampire? They’d called it a mugging. Had the biter really robbed them? He flipped his keys against his palm but stopped one step toward his car. The hospital wasn’t far from here. Even on foot, even slowed by injury, they would have been there by now. So, if they didn’t go home, where did they go?
He called Angel to ask if Babe had come to their place. No. Angel had questions, but David promised to explain soon and they promised to call if they heard from Babe until then.
His phone rang almost as soon as he hung up.
Milo.
David answered.
“Are they okay?”
“I don’t know,” he ground out again. “They aren’t at their apartment.”
“What?”
David looked up and down the street. It was getting dark. “Was their phone stolen?”
“No. It was broken. They were on their way home from work, just got off the subway—”
David pivoted, looking in the direction of their stop.
“In their statement to the cops, they called their attacker a biter at first—said he cornered them before they could get out of the underground station and took their jacket and their bag. They didn’t have any money or cards on them so they must have left the hospital on foot. They can’t have gotten far.”
“Did they have their keys?” David started walking toward the subway station.
Milo was moving on his side too. “It didn’t sound like it.”
If David was in Babe’s shoes, he would just want to go home. He would want to be in his own space with the door locked. But if they didn’t have their keys, they couldn’t get home. They could, of course, call him. He had the spare. But he wasn’t sure they would even if they had their phone.
He descended the steps into the subway.
“I can start at the hospital and track them.”
“Are you at the hospital now?”
“I’m on my way.”
“Good.” David hung up just as the call would have cut out anyway. The air was colder underground, the lights yellow and the hallways echoing with the hum of a passing train. The afterwork crowd had thinned out and it wasn’t quite late enough for the party crowds.
He hopped the entrance and shivered when he inhaled their scent.
He wasn’t sure he’d be able to explain how relieved he felt when he saw them standing there on the platform. They looked awful. Their pants were dirty and their shirt bloodstained and torn. He’d never seen them even mussed let alone a complete mess before. One hand clutched at the bandage around their wrist, squeezing as they frowned and stared, seeming to scrutinize the tracks.
For one horrific second he thought they were going to jump. They kept cutting glances up and down the tracks and shifting their weight where they stood at the edge.
“Babe.”
They jumped and spun around too fast.
He closed the distance and caught their hands in both of his to tug them that one step forward, away from the edge.
They stared up at him, one eye blood-red where it should be white and their cheekbone bruised in dark purple clouds. Their jaw was scraped up like they’d landed on the ground, matching their scabbed palms in his hands. “What are you doing?” David asked, trying so hard to keep his voice low and soft—trying not to growl or yell because of the fear that had built in his chest from the moment he heard their name on that call.
“Oh,” they exhaled and their shoulders dropped. They looked down at themself and flushed. “Sorry. It’s been a bad night. I was mugged but it’s fine.”
They didn’t know he knew about that. “It doesn’t look fine.”
They turned toward the tracks again. “I kicked my keys when he went for them and they went down there… If he got my keys he could be at my place and if he didn’t, well, I need them.” Their voice was tinny, carefully logical but fragile in that desperation.
David nodded, still holding onto their hands and very gently drawing them another step away from the tracks. “I’ll look.”
Babe exhaled hard and shook their head, wincing at a pain in their body and stopping short in the gesture. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll find them. You’ve probably got someplace to be.”
David stared at them. Was it shock or did they really think he was just passing by? He folded their hands inside of his. This was the first time he’d ever touched Babe. Pack was very physical but David had never been good at building those relationships. With other wolves, it was easier. It was simpler. With the non-shifters in the pack, it had always been so much harder. He knew now that he’d made a mistake when he thought that was okay—that he didn’t need to build on those bonds as well. Babe was looking at him like a work associate being nice to them on a rough day. It was polite but unexpected and certainly unnecessary. They expected nothing from him.
“I don’t have anywhere to be. I came here looking for you,” he said, their hand spasming in his.
They looked down at their joined hands for the first time, as if just now registering the contact. And then their eyes widened and their face shot up to seek his gaze again. Their words rushed out of them. “I didn’t break covert.”
It was a gut punch.
They pulled their hands out of his and took a step back, chin pressing high as they tried to stand taller. “I would have let you know after… After I got home. I just…” They looked over their shoulder at the tracks and their lost keys again, frowning.
David nodded. First problem first. He could do that.
He stepped around them and up to the edge of the platform, eyeing the shadows until he spotted the bundle of keys on a ring. He jumped down.
“Be careful!” Babe rushed to the edge.
David could hear the trains and knew exactly how long he had. He snagged the keys, pocketed them, and jumped back up onto the platform. He was just turning them toward the exit when Milo came down the steps, slowing and stopping at the sight of them.
“Hey,” he said to Babe, gaze flicking over the state of them.
David heard the way the other wolf’s pulse quickened, the edges of rage tucked behind his teeth.
Babe sighed, shoulders drooping as they started up the stairs. “I guess this is a thing now.”
Milo frowned and turned to follow them. “How was this not going to be?”
David shot him a warning look but Babe didn’t wither under the badgering tone. They sighed again, a little groan of annoyance now. They were slow on the steps but neither shifter was going to rush them.
“I mean, I figured I could go home and clean up before it had to be public knowledge that I got mugged. Asher is going to be—” They stopped and swung around.
Both shifters stopped, arms out to stabilize them if they were falling over.
“Does he know? He’s going to panic and think I died.”
David blinked at the rush of words. He shook his head. “Not yet. I wanted to talk to you first.” He really just wanted to see them—to be able to tell his best friend that they were in one piece and breathing.
Babe sagged in relief, nodding, almost slumping into the railing with the weight of it. “Good. Good. Just, let me clean up and I’ll video call him. That’ll be better.”
David wasn’t sure it would be, but he nodded.
Babe started the upward march again. David had never realized how many fucking steps their were until he watched this human drag themself up each one. He could swear he could hear Milo’s teeth grinding on the effort not to pick them up—the same as his.
“Do you know who it was?” David asked, trying to distract all of them while getting a little information.
“What?”
“The biter,” Milo helped.
Babe jerked a little, free hand flying to the bandage on their wrist. “I’m not going to turn am I?”
Milo laughed.
David groaned. “No. Asher really needs to take you to those classes…”
They exhaled tired relief. “Never saw him before. He cornered me and tossed me around. Bit my wrist and then laughed. He wanted my stuff, my phone, my keys, and my wallet.” They swallowed, looking up at the last stretch of steps.
David squeezed his fists until his fingers popped to resist scooping them up.
They continued to walk. “But my phone was busted from his initial attack and the keys I’d kicked. The next train was coming in. He took all my cards though and said…” Babe stopped then they reached the sidewalk atop the steps. They took a deep breath.
“Said what?” David asked.
They opened their eyes and looked at him, not seeming to know what he was talking about at first.
“What did the vampire say?”
A shudder rocked them when they remembered and it was like watching a person remember to be afraid. “Oh.”
“Babe?”
They looked up the street toward their building. “He said he’d see me later.”
Milo growled low in his chest and David felt relieved at the sound if only because it was the echo of the one he was holding back.
Babe looked at them both. “He didn’t mean it though, right? I mean, that’s just something someone would say to scare. There’s no reason for him to bother with me again.”
David frowned. “You don’t need to worry about it.”
Babe nodded like he was agreeing with them, relieved and started down the sidewalk.
David tipped his head toward Milo, who hadn’t moved a muscle. “Find him,” David growled. “Get Darlin to help you and hunt him down. I want him in pieces in a box by morning.”
Milo nodded once and was gone.
David joined Babe, close at their side but not quite touching, always ready to catch them or buffer anyone else out of their way. It was one of the longest walks of his life but they both sagged in relief when they reached their apartment door. For a second Babe thought they’d lost their keys again, until David pulled them from his pocket and unlocked the door.
“You don’t have to stay,” they said when they were inside.
He shut and locked the door. The lock was just for them. Nothing was getting past him.
Babe let out a little laugh. “I’m going to clean up, okay? I’ll call Ash after that. Just… Just wait, okay?”
David nodded and stayed in the living room when they headed down the hall to their bathroom.
He kept his senses focused on their breathing, hearing it even through the shut door and the spray of the shower. It took everything he had not to move when they started crying. They needed that moment alone and he wasn’t going to take it from them. He was going to pretend he hadn’t listened, even if he was, even if he had to just in case they passed out.
He texted Angel to let them know that he had found Babe, everything was okay, but he’d be over at Asher and Babe’s for a while.
-
Babe tried not to cry. Really they did. It was stupid. It wouldn’t help anything. Oh god but it had been such a bad night. They’d been so scared and then so embarrassed and now they were a mess and they’d have to call Asher and he’d feel terrible and the whole pack knew and it was going to be a big deal and how could they even convince anyone it wasn’t when their face looked like that!
They stripped down and bunched all their clothes into a tight ball, cramming them down into the trash and then tying off the plastic bag and throwing it into the corner. They felt like a mess. They felt out of control and like everyone was looking. It made their skin hurt.
They showered, trying not to wallow and take too long because they knew David would still be out there. Poor guy was stuck having to sit in their living room, thinking they were falling apart. If they could show him they were fine he’d probably feel okay to leave.
They cried some more in the shower, hoping to get the last of it out. They cleaned up, dressed in some soft sweats and a hoodie with long sleeves. Their palms throbbed, the scrapes deep and matching the ones on their jaw. It was going to look even worse tomorrow. And their eye… they could barely look at it, the white gone red.
When it was as good as it was going to get, they marched back down the hall to their living room. David wasn’t there. Their heart lurched but just as soon as they’d started to panic that they were all alone, they found him in the kitchen. He had the fridge open but had stopped to stare back at them. “I forgot that living with Ash, there’s never any leftovers.”
They exhaled, letting some of the strain in their chest go with that breath. “Yeah. I can make you—”
He shot them a look that was between outrage and shock. “I’ll make us something. What do you want?”
“Oh. You don’t have to.”
“French toast, right?”
Babe stared at him, the sleeves of Asher’s hoodie bunched up in their palms, pressing into those scrapes. “What?”
“When we do pack get togethers overnight and make waffles or pancakes in the morning… Ash always asks for French toast,” he said as he pulled the eggs and milk out and then found a loaf of bread. “He never used to ask for French toast. He has a whole thing about pancakes being superior to all other breakfast options. He started asking for French toast when you joined.”
Babe felt heat rush their face and something ease in their heart. They sank into one of the bar stools at the kitchen counter, nodding. “Yeah.” They loved French toast.
David nodded and then took out of phone and waved it over his shoulder. “Do you want to call or do you want me to?”
Tears stung their eyes. It was stupid. Everything was fine and they just needed to let Ash know that.
They held out their hand and David passed them the phone.
It wasn’t hard to find his number and it only rang a couple times before that voice they’d been missing so much picked up.
“Hey buddy. What’s up?” Asher sing-songed, thinking it was David calling.
He was on some trip to meet and get to know other packs on the continent, a gathering out in the wilderness to build relationships. Baby sighed.
The levity was gone from his voice. “Babe? What are you doing on David’s phone?”
How the hell were they supposed to say this? “Everything is okay. Everyone is okay. I just… My phone is broken.” True but not all of it. They closed their eyes. “I got mugged in the subway and my phone got broken. David had to walk me home.” Nope, not quite. “There was a police report and I had to go to the hospital, but I’m okay and I didn’t break covert or anything.”
The pause seemed long even if it was only seconds. “Oh Baabe,” he said so gently that their heart melted. “I’m so sorry. You’re sure you’re okay? That must have been so scary.”
They exhaled so much relief, dropping their head forward onto their folded arm on the counter. Thank god he hadn’t freaked out. They weren’t sure they could handle that right now. They just wanted normal. “It was but I’m okay.”
“You’re home now?”
They nodded and then remembered they had to actually say it. “Yeah.”
“You’re so fucking tough, Baabe. I’ll be there in the morning.”
They sat up, dragging a breath. “You don’t have to—”
“You know I’m coming home. Really, you’re giving me an excuse to do exactly what I want, which is to come back to you. So just hang tight, okay? Order delivery or something, sleep in, and I’ll be there when you wake up, okay?”
Babe hummed something close to a yes.
“David’s there?”
“Yeah.”
“Can I talk to him? I’ll be home soon, okay? I love you so much, Baabe.”
“I love you too,” they said and then held out the phone.
David took it and held it to his ear.
-
David turned back toward the eggs.
“Who?” There was no smile or light-heartedness to Asher’s voice now.
“Milo’s on it.”
“How bad is it?”
“Not bad.” He couldn’t give him details without Babe overhearing. “I’ll text you.”
“Broken bones?”
“No,” he was fast to answer that.
“Unempowered?”
“No.”
Asher growled.
“Milo’s on it,” David reminded. “I’ll have it for you when you get here.”
“David…” Asher started, human voice shuddering with the effort to stay in that form when probably his whole wolf was trying to shift out and run.
“Anything,” he said.
“Just… stay with them until I get there? They’re tough but…”
David nodded. He’d never intended to go anywhere. “We’re making French toast. We’ll be here when you get back to town.”
Asher grunted and hung up. It wasn’t like him to be short on words but David understood.
Babe had their head in their arms again. “You don’t have to stay,” they said as soon as he started cracking eggs. “I’m probably just going to sleep.”
“Great. Then I can pick what we’re watching.”
Babe lifted their head and looked at him before relenting with a nod. “Sure. You’re a good friend. Asher’s lucky to have you,” they said, voice quiet with the soft compliment.
It made his chest swell but his brow pinch. “You’re pack, Babe. Yes, you’re Asher’s mate, but you’re also pack.” He sighed. “You should have called me from the hospital, not because this was some sort of trouble you needed to report but because you needed help.”
“I didn’t.”
“You could have used help,” he reworded for them and felt the echo of his words in words spoken to him by Asher in the past. “You could have called any of us. You don’t have to call me if you don’t want to, but Milo or—”
“My phone was broken.”
“There are phones in the hospital. You know you could have called… and I know why you didn’t. But you don’t need to need us to call us. It’s okay to just want us to show up.”
They pressed their lips, thinking about it.
He cracked another egg. “And stop worrying about covert.”
They looked up. “But you worry about covert—”
“Yeah. It’s my job to worry about it on behalf of the pack. You don’t need to give a shit about it. When someone hurts you, all bets are off, and I will handle everything else.”
Babe blinked at him and then finally asked. “The vampire isn’t going to come back for me, is he?”
David huffed, looking for the cinnamon on the shelf. “No. You don’t ever need to worry about that.”
Babe sighed and nodded. “Thanks.”
“Any time.”
#redactedverse#redacted asmr#fanfic#babe & david#pack feels#pack dynamics#mugging fic#light angst#developing friendship#<3
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serein
⤹ now playing: sunny days by wave to earth
PAIRING: boyfriend!haechan x female!reader
GENRE: fluff !!
WARNINGS: mentions of food, pet names (love), explicit language (shit)
WC: 0,9k
A/N: happy birthday to the loveliest boy<3
* .♡ *:･ﾟ✧ ⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆
the droplets of rain pattered on the double-glass window like dog paws on a wooden floor. it was the ripe beginning of summer, yet the weather felt particularly capricious today.
june didn't feel like june, you thought, as your arm hair raised with a sudden shiver that passed through your body, which was caused by a customer who opened the door to the convenience store, letting the rainy wind follow him as the door closed behind him with force. you hugged your body, trying to stay warm in your boyfriend haechan's mahogany varsity jacket. he had noticed your shiverings earlier during your walk at the beach, and he insisted on giving it to you. you argued, saying that he needs to stay warm too, but you were smart enough not to keep on arguing with him because, at the end of the day, he always won.
"so, buldak ramen?" haechan asked with his back turned to you, as he tilted his head to the side to take a peek at your confirmation. "always" you answered and he smirked with a tiny nod. he placed your order inside the basket he was holding and continued roaming in the aisles in an attempt to create a full meal out of instant ramen and other pre-packaged food.
the activities you had planned for the day didn't turn out the way you wanted; the two of were meant to go on a picnic date at the beach and stay out until later just to watch the sunset. your date began like this indeed, with a walk along the beach, yet the moment your laid your blanket on the sand, the first rain droplets started to fall.
haechan didn't mind this change of plans; you, however, sulked and pouted all the way back because your beautiful date idea was ruined. the beginning of summer was also ruined, and above that, your boyfriend's birthday was ruined.
haechan's spontaneous personality as always managed to save the day. he took you by your hand and held you all the way back to the city until he stopped at the first convenience store you found on your way. "let's grab something to eat. we can still get a view of the beach here if we sit by the front window" he said.
so you sat down at one of the stools on the tall tables by the window, waiting for haechan to finish paying for your food. you insisted on treating him as an early birthday gift, but he whined and fussed about it. "what kind of gentleman am i if i don't treat my girlfriend to some dinner?" he said. he won once again.
you didn't have to turn around to see him taking a seat next to you. his warm aura, his scent similar to the fresh air that engulfs the atmosphere on the first morning of summer was enough to make his presence known. he had already prepared your food. he placed the ramen cups on the table and slid yours in front of you, handing you a pair of chopsticks afterwards.
"did you enjoy our time together today?" he asked you as he munched on his food. you shrugged. "i did, haechan, but our date was ruined."
your boyfriend rolled his honey eyes playfully at you and nudged your shoulder. "oh, come on now," he dragged each syllable in an annoying manner, "we can do the picnic another time. you always focus on all those trivial things and let them ruin your mood. just the fact that i spent time with you today is enough for me," haechan said as he squeezed your cheek, dragging it upwards in an attempt to turn your frowny grimace into a smile.
"you're too positive, you know?" you said, taking his hand in your lap to play with his fingers. "aren't you mad we missed the sunset?"
haechan took control of your hand, playing with your fingers now. this game always turned into a little fight and kept going on forever until one of you eventually gave up. it would mostly be haechan who would win, as his competitive nature would cheat by tickling your sides with his free hand, making you laugh and lose your grip over him. this time, he decided to remain calm because he tended to be quite shy in public.
"sunsets are beautiful, yes, but we can always see one another time. i'm here, we're together and that's all that matters. that's the only birthday present i need right now, love" he said and you smiled at his words, reminding you that you loved him just for that, the sense of comfort he gave you, the feeling of hope for a bright day ahead.
"now that i'm thinking about it," you started and haechan hummed as he leaned his face closer to yours, "you are way prettier than the sunsets, anyway" you said and he smiled in his widest, brightest grin before he closed the gap between you by pulling you into a loving kiss.
just a few seconds later, haechan pulled back in a hurry, taking large sips of his iced coffee and then wincing at the tingling sensation on his lips.
"how spicy is that buldak shit, jeez" he cried and you couldn't help but laugh at the cuteness of his overreacting, taking a moment to appreciate how lucky you were to have this person in your life.
* .♡ *:･ﾟ✧ ⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆
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Timekilling Time Trailer Frame by Frame
That's right. The second trailer for Timekilling Time is out, and I'm gonna go through it frame by fucking frame. I've always done this for story-related teasers and trailers, just not on Tumblr. So, might as well do it here for once.
First thing after the logo of the event:
We see a view of a T Corp street. The visual effect over some of the silhouettes if very interesting, especially considering it's almost completely unseen on the more working-class looking people, while being very extreme on the one person with color. Some sort of visual cue showing how much 'Time' currency everyone owns perhaps?
Judging by the golden accents and clockwork motifs, seems like a T Corp official dealing with one of the workers. The official does mostly match the outfit one of the T Corp collectors we see in Canto 4, so we might be seeing some more intricacies of whatever their job entails in this Intervallo.
The transition between this and the ID showcase is a glitchy effect, interestingly enough.
Project Moon why the fuck is Ryoshu's dialogue so goddamn blurry here? Whatever, we'll get back to that line later. Let's focus on what we can see.
Ryoshu is getting the 00 Identity, and is an Event Reward, meaning you'll be able to get her through grinding the event itself. Also, in case the pattern on the bandana wasn't already a dead give-away, then the name of the identity will be - we're dealing with the Yurodiviye again.
This has. A lot of lore implications. For one, we know from Canto 2 that the Yurodiviye are no longer confined to just District Y, but the fact that this is a confirmation they exist in District T as well means they are far more widespread than we might think.
Also the role they seem to take on is very interesting as well. In Canto 2 we learn of them as being a Syndicate that has connections with a bunch of other Syndicates in District J, but in here it seems like they're more official than that? We're talking straight up detective stuff, with the previous teaser implying the people we'll be working with are actually officially recognised by T Corp. Just what the fuck has Sonya been doing?
First look at event combat. Unsurprisingly, we're in the streets of T Corp. Interestingly, we're fighting the human T Corp Collectors we got to see in Canto 4 but didn't get to fight. Does that imply some sort of inner conflict in T Corp? Like I said above, the previous teaser implied the detective work we're doing is for T Corp's interests, why are we being impeded by other T Corp officials?
Looking at the Skill animation, Ryoshu's Skill 1 is two coins.
Skill 2 looks like maybe three coins?
Skill 3 is definitely three coins, and that is Very Much a Tremor Burst sound effect on the last coin. We got the Tremor baby!
Finally, some readable dialogue! Doesn't give us much, but "Shake down the loaded pigs..." shows us that even in their new role, Yurodiviye still despise the rich and focus on redistributing wealth.
Also, hi Hong Lu! You're here early! We'll get to you in a moment.
Let's talk about Ryoshu's guard, as the trailer very nicely shows us that's what Ryoshu is using.
"...and share the pilfered time with everyone." Yup, just as I said, redistribution of wealth.
Anyway, Ryoshu's guard seems to have a sort of Assist Attack mechanic to it, causing her to follow up with an attack of hers after Hong Lu's own attack. This Defense Assist Attack appears to be two coins, with a Tremor Burst on the second. Already looking very interesting as an ID.
Good lord Project Moon, what is it with the unreadable Ryoshu dialogue?! At least this one is slightly legible. "Pictures? Hmph, fine-snap away. Just make sure to get all the blood splatters." This combined with the post-uptie art showing an overlay of a camera with a shattered lens gives the idea that the Yurodiviye are somewhat well known I think. Enough to warrant taking pictures of.
Aaaand here's man of the hour! A 000 Identity that will be in the Gacha - District 20 Yurodivy Hong Lu. Same faction as Ryoshu, and the fact that we are definitely dealing with a Detective archetype here, again, it brings Yurodiviye's spot in T Corp into question. Are they going to be the people we help out, or are they the bad guys we'll be catching?
There's a lot to unpack here. First - "Hmm... What an amateurish finish... They must've been really pressed for time." - again with the Hong Lu identities utterly unphased by violence! What is the deal with him! The fact that he comments on the murder scene in terms of 'finish', as if judging a piece of art, is extra suspicious considering we've got Ryoshu as the other Identity here. It also has a weird connection to Sign of Roses's Observation Log, where Hong Lu starts describing it as if it's an art piece. Something is going on here.
Next, probably the least important part - new Hong Lu hairstyle! This is the first time we get to see Hong Lu with a low ponytail, as opposed to his usual high ponytails.
Finally, something I'm sure everyone has been talking about since the first teaser we got of this Identity - the marks under his jade eye. That is very clearly a T, again seemingly marking him as connected to T Corp itself in some way. Add to that the uncanny resemblance those marks have to the barcode mark under Alphonso's eye, and we've got one hell of a mystery. What the fuck is his deal!
Another look at event combat. A different area of T Corp + a return of the more robotic looking T Corp collectors. I repeat, why are we fighting T Corp collectors if we're working with T Corp on this case? What the hell happened?
Anyway, Hong Lu's Skill 1 seems to be a two coin, and I believe this is the same animation as in the Ryoshu Defense Skill showcase, meaning we got a potential early peek at its Sin Affinity - Gloom! Doesn't bode well for this Hong Lu story-wise!
Skill 2 is a three coin skill.
"Okay, let's think. How would I do this, if I was the killer? I just have to slowly think it through, and..." Now, this doesn't have to be that deep, but this line combined with the previous one where Hong Lu judges the murder scene as 'amateurish' feels... just the slightest bit sus.
"...Hehe, I suppose I'll find the truth sooner or later, hm?" He's the worst. I love him. Anyway.
CAN WE TALK ABOUT THAT SKILL 3?
First, the animation start with Hong Lu spitting out the stick he's had in his mouth, which is followed by a flashy either one or two coin skill with a Tremor Burst, which is then followed by that same eye sparkle effect that signifies SP healing in the Liu Identity and Dieci Identity. SP heal on stagger? SP heal on Tremor Burst? Fuck if I know.
That eye is definitely sparkling. Project Moon please give us eye lore.
Also, the background is very interesting. The visual style and slight transparency makes it feel like a sort of replay of events. Is that what his eye allows him to see? Just straight up visualizing the murder?
And let's not forget the dialogue line. "Hm... let's think about what we should target next." This is. Ominous. Again, we know very little about why Yurodiviye are involved, but judging from Ryoshu's dialogue lines their core motivations haven't changed. What does it mean for them to 'target' something? Are they faking being detectives and just framing people to get their 'Time'? It is notable that the title of Hong Lu's Identity never actually refers to him as a detective or anything of the sort. Just what are they scheming?
Another glitchy transition out of the ID showcase section. Glitches seem to be a recurring theme for this Intervallo.
Anyhow, time for the event enemy showcase!
We got another look at the T Corp collector guy from the ID showcase, not much to say here.
Next up we've got... Oh! That's a Yurodivy! Looks like regardless of the faction we'll be actually working with, we'll be making enemies with everyone! That being said, it's exciting to know we're finally seeing the Yurodiviye in combat, even if it's just a very specific branch of them. The chance for a future Sonya fight or Sonya Rodya ID has risen due to the fact we're seeing this faction in action!
T Corp collector guys from Canto 4, yup, we've seen that earlier as well.
And here we are. In a split second frame. That is the character that Hong Lu's Identity is based on! Not much else to say on this because it's such a quick snippit, but it again puts Yurodiviye's role in the Intervallo's story in the question. If we don't start off working with them, why are they appearing as detective types? If we do start off working with them, what happens to make them turn on us?
Fascinating.
Also, another glitchy transition.
Alright, there's a lot to talk about here. First off, the CG in the background - what the fuck is going on.
Dante and Hong Lu (in his detective garbs) are looking at Meursault in... some Zero Time Dilemma looking ass contraption. Meursault has his arms crossed, the contraption connects to his head, and there's a T Corp logo on it. I honestly have no idea what to do with this information.
Next up - the dialogue line and character sprite silhouette.
"We observed a large-scale, unauthorized temporal leakage phenomenon... which shot you up the progressive Time Tax bracket due to the immense amount of time leak." Uhhhh, I understand what those word mean on their own I guess. My only guess here is that this is the work of Yurodiviye in some way. Looks like Limbus Company is gonna be dealing with the fallour of this temporal leak, whatever that entails.
The character silhouette itself... doesn't give us much. A secretary of some sort? One of the T Corp officials giving us a job? Hard to tell.
Again, a lot to look through.
First we got a view of the whole room the previous CG is taking place in, including office desks and a shitload of clocks everywhere. We're definitely in some sort of T Corp office space, that's for sure.
"Isn't it absolutely brilliant? The very concept of 'killing time'. They're not slowing down or speeding up time; they're eliminating it completely, just entirely yanking it out of circulation." Hmm... Again, hard to say much about this line with its lack of context, but it certainly does seem interesting. All of T Corp stuff we've seen thus far does rely on things like speeding up or slowing down. The TimeTrack upgrade in LobCorp lets you speed up time. The L Corp time loop and the R Corp hatchery compress time so that what takes a long time inside takes less time outside. The Warp Train collects the time of its extremely long travels to sell to T Corp. Straight up deleting time seems very different from what we've seen thus far.
Also, the matter of the silhouette - whoever it is doesn't seem to be the same person as the Yurodivy we see in the split second frame, so whoever this is likely has no connection to Rodya or Sonya.
...This might sound a little out there, but I feel like this would be the perfect opportunity for Project Moon to pull out their own version of Sherlock Holmes. It almost feels like a waste to not include that reference in a detective themed Intervallo.
And now for the biggest surprise of them all from this Trailer - Faust is getting a WAW E.G.O. The name of the E.G.O itself is Everlasting, and the Abnormality it's based on is the Time Duck from the Mirror Dungeon event, also known as the Abnormality that gives the E.G.O Gift Melted Spring.
Not much is known about the Abnormality, as its MD Event primarily connects it to the Duck-Rabbit Illusion, where you have to tell it whether it's a Duck or a Rabbit in your eyes, with the Abnormality fleeing if the answer isn't confident enough.
"How does it appear, my form in your eyes? Perhaps within the clockwork of time the answer lies?" First of all- nice rhymes. Second of all - this is a direct reference to the MD Event, but also very interesting with regards to Faust herself. There's a lot about Faust that shows she lacks self-awareness, with her describing herself as someone who only speaks when asked and doesn't talk much, when in reality she goes on endless tangents without prompting. Add to that the Council of Fausts theory, and it makes the idea of her seeking the opinion of other people with regards to her identity resonate quite intensely.
Also, I'm pretty sure more than enough people have made comparisons between Everlasting Faust and Eileen the Church of Gears leader, but it has to be stated that there definitely are some parallels here. Again, further adds to the Council of Fausts theory, as it would make Everlasting Faust a mirror to Eileen. Eileen, who controls the gears in her head, and Faust, who is controlled by the gears in her head.
Oh, and the E.G.O is Tremor as well. Because why not. At least Faust has a good Tremor Identity already, so it works well.
Putting this here for the woman likers.
Corrosion time. For one, Faust takes on a distinctly bird-like form here. Not sure what exactly this means in the grand scheme of things for the E.G.O's meaning just yet, but it does feel important to note.
"Thus. You cease to move. Trapped in the stopped time. For eternity." ...Hm. There's a few ways this can be interpreted. If we ignore the time-related references and treat them as something only connected to the Abnormality, it gives us the idea of Faust being trapped. Being unable to move on her own, likely due to her extreme ties with Limbus Company and/or the Council of Fausts.
However, adding the time motif into it makes it more interesting. There's a lot of ways one can be 'stuck in time' and unable to move forward. One is a literal time stop Za Warudo style, and another is being trapped in a Time Loop, being unable to make progress due to always being reset and thus ceasing to move for eternity. Both feel relevant to Faust when it comes to what little we've learned of her 'goal' from her original character PV.
There's something Faust is seeking above all else. Some piece of knowledge that is nigh unobtainable. ...But what comes after she reaches it? I think the Corrosion line alludes to exactly that.
If it's a Time Stop scenario, that means that once Faust reaches the unreachable she will just. Stop. There's nothing left for her. She'll be trapped for eternity knowing everything she wished for but being unable to keep moving forward, because there'll no longer be anything for her to move towards.
If it's a Time Loop scenario, that means that Faust's constant push towards the unreachable is an inescapable loop. Once she learns what she wishes, it won't be enough, and she'll just repeat the process again. Stuck in a cycle of reaching everything, coming back to nothing, and reaching for everything anew ad infinitum. No movement made in the process, because she always comes back to square one.
Either way, it doesn't bode well for her.
On another note, the animation fucks severely, and there's another glitchy transition.
Time Georg. Sorry. Actually not sorry.
Seriously though, we get to see another view of T Corp streets, this time with one of the factories in the background and, funnily enough, the fucking Big Ben. We really are in London.
"An average T Corp. citizen has about 20 to 28 hours in a day, but you might also run into people like him; people with plenty time to spare. Because he has so much surplus time, he can afford to condence 40, 50 hours into a single day." Looks like the 'Time' currency doesn't just act as money - you literally can use it to manipulate your time scale. If you're rich, you can do like L Corp Time Loop and make yourself experience more time than everyone around you. It's also notable that the average T Corp citizen can go as low as having less than 24 hours in a day. Guess that explains why people are so desperate that they try to steal 'Time' from each other - their days literally get shorter than more debt they have.
Also, who is this 'him'? Who is this mysterious man with so much ''Time' he can have double his daily hours? I wonder if it's the fully colored man from the first CG of the trailer?
Hey it's the same factory CG from the previous teaser! Nice to know we're still on the track of visiting one.
"And to people with fewer hours in a day... it'll look as though he's moving two, three times faster than them. Someone with that much time could pick their nose in the blink of an eye before anyone even has the chance to catch them in the act." Yup, this explains the visual effect in the first CG. People with a lot of 'Time', who can have more hours in a day than other people, straight up look like they're moving so fast they leave behind after images.
Also, this very much feels like a commentary on how the rich can get away with things just because they're rich. A man rich with 'Time' can get away with unsightly behaviors just because he moves so fast people can't see him do it, just how real life rich people can get away with crimes because they have enough money to not care about fines.
Another glitch transition.
We get to see the iconic CG from the Roadmap, this time in washed out T Corp colors and in all its glory. God I'm excited for seeing more of these goobers.
After we get the logo again, not only do we see the glitch effect, but the music completely cuts out.
What follows is a constantly glitching out text with a background noise that gets louder and more discordant as it goes on.
"Can't wait for what won't come."
"Now is the time for action."
"All those time-killing bastards..."
"I'll..."
Hmmm. Curious and ominous. The presentation of these words does not bode well for the fate of whoever is speaking them, but the content makes me even more interested.
Because... this is Yurodiviye we're talking about. Sonya's whole thing was that he kept reading and learning about theory instead of actually acting until after Rodya commited murder, and even then his personal actions within the group seems confined to establishing connections with other Syndicates and delegating duties to others.
So to have someone who opposes the idea of sitting back and waiting so vehemently in the same Intervallo as Yurodiviye coming back into the spotlight... It is certainly interesting, don't you think?
Alright, that's all for the Trailer! Holy shit I'm excited for this Intervallo.
#lu speaketh#limbus company#limbus company spoilers#timekilling time#intervallo 6.5#limbus company teaser analysis#limbus company analysis#ryoshu lcb#hong lu lcb#faust lcb
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OnK Chapter 151
Me two weeks ago:
Me reading this chapter:
The fact that Aka did parallel Chapter 30 makes me feel like we're definitely going to see some Tokyo Blade & Private parallels as the anime covers those arcs. For the better or for the worse.
But we'll get there in due time. For now, time to laugh at the writing again 😂
I have to hand it to Aka. I mentioned that last chapter highlighted like half the reasons why I find romantic Aqua/Kana so poorly written, and this chapter right here did a fine job at highlighting the rest 😂
I want to be an actress!
Well... Aqua wants me to be an idol and it may not be so bad actually, I want to be Aqua's Oshi no Ko!
Aqua is ignoring me! Being an idol sucks, I quit! I'm going to be a great actress!
I may have a chance with Aqua actually. I just want to be his Oshi no Ko!
It's wild to me that Aka had Kana say that her current dream is just to be Aqua's Oshi no Ko. Absolutely wild. This girl was so desperate to become a well-known actress that she was willing to be casting-couched for it, yet suddenly now it's actually it's fine that I peaked when I was five tee hee!
She's obviously lying to herself and settling for the level she is in now because she thinks that reaching that level of notoriety is out of her reach, but...
Not gonna lie, as someone who has seen Akane be called everything from obsessed to emotionally dependant to simp, it is hilarious to witness Kana's writing right now.
But I guess it couldn't have been any other way, because what Kana asks out of Aqua this chapter is a reflection of what she has wanted all along:
I mentioned it before that Kana started fixating on Aqua as being that person for her, and this chapter shows that's still the case. There's nothing inherently wrong with that IMO, in fact it could be empowering to know that as long as this one person is in your corner, you can take on the world.
The problem is that so far, Aka hasn't quite written it that way. The secret behind Kana's acting is that she wants people to look at her, she wants people to acknowledge her, to love her. But when that desire is centered on Aqua and Aqua alone, she gets so hung-up on him that it's debilitating. She literally became a shell of herself during that year Aqua was no longer a part of her life.
Last time I felt Kana was acting pathetic, Aka confirmed that she was indeed meant to be perceived that way, and Kana gave herself a reality-check:
I thought Kana's moment of self-awareness was going to lead her to be emotionally independent from Aqua, but it seems that the fact that Aqua wound up saving her either way undid that progress. Now that she has hope that he may date her if she makes a move, she's taking it so far that she's ranking her romance with him over her lifelong dreams.
All this to say that since Aka once deliberately wrote Kana being overly dependant on Aqua to show that it's not how she is meant to be, I can't help but hope we may see something similar later.
Granted, Kana being written like a shounen love-interest whose entire purpose is just to get with the MC has always been a risk, so I guess this is par for that course lol
As for Aqua, I mentioned before that I believe Kana is everything he liked about both, Ai and Sarina and thus, the perfect Oshi... and this chapter has Kana declaring out-loud that she wants to be his one true Oshi No Ko.
Moreover, this is happening right after Ruby told Aqua this:
And while Sarina is undoubtedly Goro's Oshi, Kana wants to be Aqua's. The issue with that however... is that Kana wants to be the only person Aqua looks at, his Number One.
Meanwhile, Aqua kind of has his hand full in that regard already, so it's no wonder that through his shock, he isn't able to "catch" the ball symbolizing that particular part of Kana's dream 😂
There's his eyes, too. Last chapter I said that Aka seems to want us to compare the Aqua-Ruby chapters we got in this volume with Kana's, and the way Kana's confession was structured seems to confirm this is the case. So following that comparison, it stands out to me that Ruby's words brought out Aqua's white star and Kana's didn't. Especially because just a few chapters ago we saw Kana bring out Aqua's white star just by being Kana:
In this chapter Kana praises him, validates him, confirms that she is into him (which he has likely known since, coincidentally, at least Chapter 30), yet Aqua’s star remains black all throughout.
Why is that? Is it just his self-hatred and his guilt-complex keeping him from accepting that he’s the object of Kana’s straight gaze?
Or could Aka be hinting at something else?
Aqua has a lot of issues. Some have been with him since he was Goro, and others he has developed during his current life. We saw that Ruby's words pacified the "Goro" within him, but Aqua dismissed Ruby's affection as being aimed at him because he once was Goro. It's not something he feels he has earned in his current life. Kana is the other side of that complex equation. Everything she knows about him are things he has been willing to show her, but what about everything else? What about his trauma and his dark impulses? What about his past? Aqua likely thinks her view of him is skewed, and he is not wrong in that regard. But I'll stop there before I bring Akane into the mess lmao
All in all, for the time being, I feel like what we saw this chapter tracks with my thoughts here:
Aqua, Kana, Ai and Aka's concept of Oshi
Kana is the Ultimate Oshi (parallels to Sarina and Ai) + 1
Even more parallels and a theory about their purpose
Considering how lousy Aka's writing has been lately, I feel like this is still the most interesting route he could take. After all, if we abide by the values he preached in Kaguya, then Oshi is meant to be a platonic concept. So following Aka's logic, for Aqua and Kana to end up together, Aqua would need to tell her that he doesn't want her to be his Oshi, but his lover.
Of course, it's entirely possible that Aka is going to walk back on all of that. Oshi no Ko is supposed to be its own manga, after all. Maybe it's his attempt at writing tropes in the most straight-forward way possible and Aka's new idea of a big love declaration is Aqua finally waving the white lightstick at Kana's graduation concert.
If the curtains truly are just blue, I hope the writing will remain as hilarious as it has been these past few chapters 😂
In the meantime, the other thing that stood out to me this chapter was Aqua himself. We all know that being a surgeon was Goro's dream, so it makes sense for Goro to chase that dream in this new life as Aqua. I was even happy for him when he first brought it up because this life is his chance to do everything he wanted but couldn't in his first life!
But last chapter we had a big showing of "Goro" telling "Aqua" that he is free to live his own life now. In other words, instead of trying to do what Goro would have done if he had a second chance, he can focus on doing the things that he wants to do as the individual he has become during his life as Aqua Hoshino.
So, I feel like this begs the question: is being a surgeon truly Aqua Hoshino's dream? Like not even something he wants to do alongside other things, but his outright dream?
I can't help but wonder. Particularly because, in my opinion, the TB arc did a good job at foreshadowing that Aqua Hoshino is made to be an actor.
In this chapter Kana seems to be fooling herself into giving up on her childhood dream because she thinks it's out of her reach. It would fit, then, for the Aqua in this chapter to be fooling himself as well.
If we entertain the thought of wanting to be a surgeon being a vestige of his old life rather than something Aqua truly dreams of in his current life, then his reaction in these pages becomes more interesting:
Kana assumes Aqua is just embarrassed, but these panels to me read like something more than that - for more reasons than one.
Just like Goro guided him to Kana last chapter possibly based on his own wants, in this chapter Kana unknowingly guides him to Goro's.
She is completely right. Every word she says rings true.
But I'd argue that everything she said was already accomplished by Goro in his previous life. He did save lives (although not as many as he would've wanted, and not the ones that counted the most for him), he was a light to Sarina, etc. etc. He was a good doctor.
Everything Kana says about Aqua was already true of Goro. On the other hand, Kana's description of Aqua paints nothing but virtues, and we know for a fact Aqua isn't only just light. More than that, we know for a fact that Aqua doesn't see himself that way.
Much like how in Chapter 149 we got Kana giving a very positive but very one-sided description of Akane that leaves out her negative traits, Kana more or less does the same thing with Aqua here.
In Chapter 149, Akane first got flustered (her idol Kana-chan was praising her, after all) and then sobered up; possibly because for her it's the opposite (she isn't a goody-two-shoes nor normal nor decent, and men would prefer women who are - like Kana).
I feel like in this Chapter, we may or may not have seen a repeat of this with Aqua. It's his Oshi no Kana praising him, but does he really believe the things she's saying of him? Or are they just a reminder of what he is not (according to himself)?
I can't help but wonder, because last time we saw Aqua blushing to the point that he had to hide his face, Mengo and Aka made sure we could see his blush.
The way he is drawn here is very obviously meant to be paralleled to this chapter, he shields his face in the same way and all. So why not simply show his blush, just like they did in Chapter 29?
Granted, this is just me naturally going for the most interesting possibility lol It is entirely possible and even likely that this is all as simple as it seems. But to be fair, in Chapter 30 he throws the ball at Kana in the same way and it wasn't because Kana was right. At the contrary: it was because he was having a moment and Kana drew the most basic conclusion out of it, one that embarrassed him lmao
Geez it's kind of sad how this manga lends itself to two completely different readings and the most basic one is the one with the highest chances of being true 😂
#fandom: onk#me: aqua and kana#I'd looooove to just focus on the in-your-face-read of all this#but I can't help myself lmao the alternative reading is so much more interesting#granted it could all lead to the same destination either way#but at least the road to get there would be more interesting than just kana living out her shoujo romance 😂
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So we all know that Stammi Vicino – Non Te Ne Andare is essentially Viktor’s cry for help in a world where he has neglected his personal life for twenty years, giving everything he has to his sport and becoming an untouchable god because of it. And the lyrics are so sad and I just want to talk about them and what I think is going on because I can’t get it out of my head.
I hear a voice weeping in the distance
Have you maybe been abandoned as well?
We start out with Viktor looking for this person who can understand how he feels, that same desperation for connection between the two of them. They are not united yet, but are able to come together because of their circumstances. Viktor, who has no family that we know of (or even friends outside of skating) is so utterly alone that this chance at having another soul who gets him has to be this horrible gnawing desire.
Come now, I'll quickly finish this glass of wine
I’ll start to get ready
Be quiet now
The glass of wine only confirms my thoughts about his loneliness, in my opinion – he has been sitting there alone, silently, enjoying this small pleasure with no company. And now he moves to join this distressed individual addressed at the beginning. There’s little comfort here beyond an attempt to silence their crying, it’s less of an established connection and more of an acknowledgement of similar circumstances. He can understand what it’s like to be sad and alone without feeling like there’ll be any change.
With a sword I wish I could cut those throats singing about love
I wish I could enclose in ice the hands that write those verses of burning passion
There’s some frustration here – Viktor is 27 years old when he skates Stammi Vicino. This is past the age where many people experience these passionate romances for the first time, finding a twin flame with which to go through life. Despite how much people adore him, how successful he has become, how admired he is… he cannot be loved because no one truly knows him. There’s so much media out there about people finding each other, these grand love affairs and lasting friendships that add so much depth to a person’s life. And he has nothing. It must be infuriating, to have so much and yet so little. And I think there might be something there with the “enclose in ice the hands that write those verses of burning passion” as well, with him reflecting on his own circumstances in comparison to these love stories. Why don’t they have to suffer the same fate as him, married to the ice? Why must his heart remain frozen and no one else’s?
This story that has no meaning
Will vanish tonight together with the stars
If I could see you, eternity will be born from hope
There is no meaning to his life, nor is there any meaning behind his connection with this other person. They do not know each other. This is fleeting, and temporary, and entirely impermanent… but god, he wants so badly. He knows he can’t have it but he wants to hope so much.
Stay close to me, don’t go away
I’m afraid of losing you
This hope has taken root in his soul. Despite the fact that he is so utterly alone and this individual who maybe can just barely begin to understand how he feels isn’t truly with him in any way that matters, he can’t bear the idea of giving up this tiny thing that is all he has left. This is a moment of pure vulnerability, the admission of just how scared he is. He is going through the motions, facing everything he has to entirely alone. Even a fragment of attention and care sets him alight, he cannot bear to lose anymore than he has already.
Your hands, your legs,
My hands, my legs,
And our heartbeats
Are blending together
Here he comes together with this person. I still don’t think it’s viewed as a bond that he believes in, but acceptance of potential and the fact that maybe they could have something together. He feels something intertwined in their souls, some semblance of similarity. And for him, that means a lot.
Let’s leave together
I’m ready now
The glass of wine has been put down, he has acknowledged his anger and frustration, and he is ready to move forward. There’s something for him, maybe, if he keeps looking. He can only hope.
Now. I could go on and talk about what the banquet meant to Viktor, and how this was maybe the first time he had wanted a person in his life this way, or I could just talk about the duetto … which is what I’m going to do.
So the duetto contains some pretty obvious lyric changes, namely the fact that the verses
With a sword I wish I could cut those throats singing about love
I wish I could enclose in ice the hands that write those verses of burning passion
This story that has no meaning
Will vanish tonight together with the stars
If I could see you, eternity will be born from hope
are removed. Hmmmmmmmm… all of the longing, none of the aggravation towards that sickly sweet romance? None of the denial that this could matter, the quiet desperation that maybe he might be allowed to hope for once? Because finally, after years of searching and waiting and quietly, so quietly, hoping – Viktor found someone who sees him. Who loves him, who wants him for who he is. They can stay close to each other, and neither of them will go away. Yuuri adds this color and warmth to his life that he had been looking for, and Viktor in turn has given Yuuri the chance to flourish and become the best version of himself, all the while having someone by his side who simply will not leave him. They are able to support each other in ways no one else can, and that is what makes their pair skate so beautiful.
#victor nikiforov#viktor nikiforov#yuri katsuki#yuuri katsuki#victuuri#yuri on ice#I wrote this instead of the paper I was supposed to be doing
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the people who have all this empathy for jaune “i’ve been alone for so long!” but turn around and have absolutely none for salem who was alone for. orders of magnitude longer. they confuse me
misogyny is always a contributing factor to this sort of double standard, but also in this case it is absolutely driven by narrative framing and familiarity: we’re introduced to jaune as this sort of pathetically obnoxious loser who transforms into an all-around pretty decent guy once the machismo bullshit has been soundly knocked out of him and he settles down with his true strengths (caring about his friends a lot and quietly doing things that need doing), so his extreme out of pocket behavior in v9 is shocking. it’s not like him at all; it’s a side of him we’ve only seen glimmerings of before in his worst moments.
in contrast, salem is the villain and for the first five volumes of the story the only things we really know about her is that she’s a grimm-person who kills people and hates the huntsmen academies for the presumable reason of being a grimm—AND THEN the horrific tragedies that made her this way are presented to the audience through the very biased lens of ozpin’s perspective, with the result that her humanity in all this is elided because oz has spent the last few thousand years (not) coping by desperately trying to convince himself that salem is and always has been ontologically evil.
which is to say, the lost fable only humanizes her if you, as a viewer, are willing to set aside preconceived notions about her built up over the previous five volumes and question the narratorial voice telling you that she’s always been Horrible. this is not an accident—the whole narrative hinges on the obfuscation of salem’s humanity and the very gradual erosion of these stories told about her by other characters—the story is playing a long game, here. so there’s nothing especially shocking about the lost fable; to a viewer who isn’t interested in knowing why salem does these awful things, it only fills in details confirming that she’s Just a Bad Egg.
that’s also why—imo—6.4 is equally as crucial as 6.3, because the scene with hazel et al returning to evernight and everybody expecting salem to shoot the messenger only for her to pointedly not do that, and then make a point of sending everyone out of the room and struggling to restrain her anger when she actually does lose her temper, is surprising and is in contradiction with what we’ve been told, by qrow and ozpin and raven and jinn, to expect from her. so that’s how it is annotates the lost fable by subverting the expectation that salem is going to kill or maim someone in retribution for the loss at haven. surprise is a powerful narrative tool.
of course, that’s still much more subtle than the stark change in jaune’s character, so it too gets overlooked by… anyone who wasn’t already inclined to read between the lost fable’s lines.
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Bruh. The episode name is "the vanishing of holly wheeler". Not only did they copy Will's episode name and gave it to Holly but they also are intending to give the kidnapping plotline to her character. And we know that should follow up by the other wheelers trying to save her. It is basically making the wheelers byers.
First of all, that list of episode titles come from an unofficial source. Could be real, could be fake. And the name of the title was "The Vanishing of *BLANK* Wheeler with no real confirmation as to the number of letters in the first name since the leak was given verbally, which was then relayed over the internet with "*****" making people believe that it could be Holly.
Second of all, rehashing season one with Holly instead of Will doesn't make any sense and likely improbable and here's why:
I don't see the narrative reason to have Holly go missing. Sure, it could still happen, but I wouldn't see the necessity for it.
The purpose of Will going missing in season 1 was to act as an inciting incident to get all of the other characters involved. The story was driven by Will's disappearance, thus why it was one of the first things we saw happen in the show and why it was deserving of the first episode title.
What would be the purpose of Holly going missing in season 5? Everything has already been set up at the end of season 4. The Upside Down is coming into Hawkins and Vecna has plans to basically take over the world. Max is in a coma and Will can still feel Vecna's left nut. That's reason enough to get the characters involved. We don't need Holly to go missing for the characters to want to take action. Also, if you wanted to get Karen and Ted involved, they already have their two other children involved with the supernatural, so they can get into it that way tangentially.
I think that people are overestimating the reasoning for wanting to replace Holly with an older and more experienced actress, I don't necessarily believe that this recast means that something terrible will happen to her, I just think she was replaced because there is a time skip and Holly is going to need to say more lines than "Mommy, it's snowing!" The original twins cast to play Holly were cast as toddlers, and Nell has more experience actually performing and saying lines. But I don't think that the Duffers are going to end their final season with giving irreparable trauma to a young girl without the chance for that to be resolved in later seasons.
What purpose would Vecna have with taking Holly? What would he even want with her? Vecna targeted specific characters for a specific purpose last season, he doesn't just kidnap little girls for the hell of it. That would be a waste of his time.
He doesn't need to kidnap Holly to get to Will, and personally I hate hate HATE the idea of Will going into the Upside Down in order to get to Holly. Will already has ties to Vecna. Why would he need to kidnap someone to get to him? Also, why would it be Holly? Why not Joyce or Jonathan? What significant relationship does Will have with this little girl who I'm pretty sure he doesn't have any screen time with?
I think people outside of fandom forget that the show has not given the audience a reason to really care about Holly other than the fact that she is a little girl. She has had no significant lines, no significant screen presence, and no significant story line. And all of a sudden the final season of the show hinges on finding this girl that the audience doesn't give a shit about. Okay.
And before someone tries to straw man me and say "Oh, so you're saying that the Wheeler's doesn't have ANY connection to the supernatural and isn't important?" Of course I think they are important. They are as important any character is, they all have their own roles in the story. But the Wheeler's involvement with the supernatural has always been tangential. Barb was taken so Nancy got involved. Will was taken and Mike found El so Mike got involved. Karen is likely to now get involved since her children are now involved. I am making my assertion based on what I am seeing in the show. They are involved with the supernatural because they make themselves involved. Both Will and El are tied to the supernatural in a more direct way, and based on what the show has told me as well as what official sources (The Duffer's themselves), they are more integral to the supernatural plot than any Wheeler. Point blank.
#~in my opinion~#feel free to disagree idc#but ive been annoyed and holding it in so i had to get it out but now my opinion is all out there so#also i still think its gonna be ted if any wheeler goes missing but i ranted enough here#feel free to read if you want#anon#asks#holly wheeler#st5 speculation#byler#<- target audience#cause thats where most of this conversation has been happening
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I keep seeing people worried abt potential Iz/ch but like. We know that he probably wanted to talk about the same thing they did at the cliff, and she will keep thinking about Toga.
Yeah, for a second I also got slightly worried -bc yk, heterosexuality can just happen at any moment-, but after reading it all it doesn't look romantic at all. At least to me.
I am going to use this ask as an excuse to discuss the leaks under the cut, elaborating on this too
This chapter, to me, looks like Izuku is considering what means for him to be a hero himself, and if he even gets to be called that.
He is really... reflecting, if we pay attention to his facial expressions. After that student who used to had Aizawa-sensei as her teacher says she realized she really wants to be a hero after dealing with his "pranks", he is contemplative, maybe thinking about what he believes a hero should do -and if he fulfilled that role.
Ochako is the person who opened up about her complicated feelings towards a villain -while keeping to herself her admiration for certain things-, and probably he wanted to know more about her fight/confrontation. Because Uraraka interrupts him to comment on his hair, they probably haven't talked during their time in the hospital -idk about medical stuff, but im pretty sure he already went thru the operation and had his head shaved in chapter 424, that's why im guessing they were more focused on healing physically than meeting each other.
Because of this, I believe Izuku doesn't know what happened between her and Himiko, and because she probably isn't as relevant for the public as AFO, the end could also be unknown to him, including Ochako's thoughts. But after seeing how she is all okay apparently, chatting like nothing happened just like most of them... he probably felt more alone.
I can't confirm what he feels bc, well, he doesnt say it. Izuku just looks to me like he is looking for someone who could understand his goal of saving a villain, and how it could hurt failing, even if you are glad everyone is okay, but the only people who were open about it -Ochako, who also was focused on stopping and saving a villain who is "not related" to her, and Shoto, who wanted to save his villain brother- don't seem to want to talk about it with him. Like they can move on into other things.
Uraraka seems fine, idk what that says about Himiko's fate -I'm hoping she is okay and we'll get to see it later-, and Todoroki directly says it... is he alone in this? Is he a bad hero bc he couldn't save Shigaraki fully, or because he's stuck in that moment?
This chapter doesnt go against the idea I expressed here -it was a promise to themselves, and he expected Ochako to tell him about the aftermath and the internal conflict of being a hero that saves villains, just like before. But now, Ochako isn't opening up to him, she is keeping it light, and he doesnt want to be a burden.
Izuku rn is isolating himself bc he isn't being vulnerable with others first -the only people he is like that is All Might, and slightly Katsuki because he can't just lie to their faces. Before, both Shoto and Ochako were the ones who would spill their feelings to him, and he expected to be able to also be honest in return -but not being the first one. If he starts it, he risks making others feel sad, angry or down for things they might not even think about, so he prefers to shut up and keep it to himself.
Him and Katsuki... is complicated, because with his feelings he ends up pushing Izuku to places he might not be comfortable with -for example, expressing his admiration and closeness to the point of being nasty and inappropriate, and not hating it bc they are parts of Kacchan. He doesn't feel like he can say that, yet Katsuki makes him see those sides of him instead of focusing on other practical things.
Izuku is a clueless character, who prefers to put others' happiness over his own, and feels conflicted over his fight with Shigaraki. He is the definition of the bad at feelings tag. When he looks for support in the people he knows could be in the same position, and start the conversation for him -give him permission to express his thoughts- he finds they are doing okay. They are not lost, confused, or stuck. They look... fine.
But he is not okay.
Making that moment just an izu///ocha moment... idk, I think that takes a lot from their characters and from Shigaraki and Himiko, like the villains are just tools to make them a couple.
#grrr talking#bkdk#dkbk#togaocha#ig???#i dont want to elaborate a lot on togachako rn as I need to see more of ochako n what could have happened#also I love how its June in their world too lol happy pride month everyone#bnha spoilers#bakudeku#using this tag so the antis can't find the post
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Rumors & The Truth
Summary: When Toji put out a statement about you and him, he realized things were about to really change for him personally.
Pairing: F1driver! Toji Fushiguro x friend! Female Reader
Warnings: cursed words, social media au
Author note: I appreciate people who left a comment on this series. Continue AU series Life In The Spotlight. Follow along Mystery Girl. This will be Toji pov and get a glimpse of what he’s feeling in a way. A little bit of reader pov as well. Enjoy reading!
– Comments, Reblogs and Likes are appreciated
Toji knew this would come out sooner or later. He knows everything is brought to the surface eventually. He just wanted to keep this side of you and him hidden way longer.
In his head he is panicking and pissed off at the same time. His publicist Ryan warns him about the paparazzi having a way of making things public and a way of not keeping quiet forever.
He tried calling you a few times but you didn’t pick up. He wanted to do the right thing even though he didn’t want to confirm anything. Toji and you were just friends who like each other company but sometimes fuck each other as well.
“What’s the plan?” Ryan asked, sitting at his desk.
Toji fixed his race suit while adjusting it a little. “You tell me.” He mocked him. “I am not going to put out a bullshit statement when you know I see Y/N only as a friend.”
Ryan sighs as he scratches the back of his neck. “Just be honest. I would never tell you to lie.” Toji pulled out the chair and sat down. “You do know her life is about to change right?” Ryan wanted to make sure that Toji knows what is about to happen.
He continues. “The amount of time the press sees you with different girls every week is different from you and y/n.”
Toji nods. “Mhm.” A part of him was hoping this day would never come. His whole career was about his new talk about him with you.
He leaned back in the chair when he heard his phone buzzing on Ryan's desk. He immediately picked up his phone and saw your name on the screen.
Thank fucking god
He pressed the green button to answer and put the phone to his ear. “Hello?”
“Is it an emergency?” You spoke through the phone.
Toji clears his throat. “I have to put out a–” He pauses for a second, turning off his British accent. “The statement I am about to post is going to be about us. Is that alright?” He sounded more American.
He really needs to stop picking up the British accent since he's been living in London for three years now even though he sometimes doesn’t pay enough attention when he talks.
“What else is new, T? Do whatever it is.” At the end of the line all he heard was a beeping sound. He couldn’t blame you for hanging up on him. He deserves it.
He sighs. “She gave me the go ahead.” He pressed one of his social media apps on his phone.
“So, what are you going to say exactly?” Ryan leaned forward with a smirk on his face.
He was loving this to begin with.
Toji rubs his chin trying to figure out what to actually say without making y/n look humiliated. “Something along the lines of us being friends.”
Ryan raises an eyebrow. “I told you people might not believe that. They are already believing you and y/n are a couple.”
Toji rolled his eyes and let out a scoff. “For fuck stake Ry.” He knew his publicist was right. In his mind he didn’t want to screw up at all. He doesn't want to lose you as a friend either.
“I’m just saying just speak from your heart and be honest this time.” He shrugged. “And hurry up because you have a race to do.” Ryan got up from his chair and squeezed Toji's shoulder before he walked out his office door.
Toji sat there with his phone in hand already had in his mind what picture he wanted to post with a caption knowing you mean so much to him in a way.
tojifushiguro I have known y/nusername for years and we have built an amazing friendship over the years. She got my back. I have hers. She is my go to in this friendship whenever I need her to just hangout or just have a good conversation with. She will always be my best friend that I can count on. I will be always be there for her as well.
After hitting the post button on his phone screen, he noticed his instagram notifications started going crazy. He shut his phone off and gave his phone to his assistant.
“I think you did the right thing.” Victoria told him.
He got up from the chair and ran his hand through his hair. “Well, whoever doesn't like the truth can shove it up their ass.” He walked out the door going straight to his team garage.
Toji realized this was just the beginning of press being in his personal life more then before
#toji fushiguro#toji fushiguro x reader#toji fushiguro x you#toji fushiguro x female reader#jjk#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jjk x fem!reader#jjk x y/n#toji fushiguro x y/n#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you#toji x reader#toji x you#toji x female reader#toji x y/n
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when was the last time you wrote a character saying “i love you”?
#fanfiction#ask game#author#for me it was in 2020 or 2021#of all the fics ive written i think i only made characters say it on 3 different occasions#i dont think ive ever written it as a confession though#just like a confirmation of what the other person already knows#or familial#im always talking about love or using the word#if it doesn't have copious amounts of angst and unresolved tension then i didn't write it#but its rare i actually make anyone say it
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(wait for the season to come back to me tag)
It gets less strange, as time goes by. Eddie doesn’t make any kind of noise about him moving out at some point, and neither do Steve and Robin. Turns out they don't need to store any bodily fluids in the fridge, and in fact if Steve didn't know better, he wouldn't be able to tell that Eddie's drinking blood at all. Steve assumes he's getting animal blood from somewhere on a regular basis, but as far as either Steve or Robin can tell, he never takes it inside the apartment.
Anyway, it turns out Eddie can still technically eat human food, but about half of it tends to come back up afterwards. They’re still figuring out what works and what doesn’t. Robin made a little chart with smiley-face and frowny-face stickers, which Eddie has been gleefully filling out. He’s drawn little fangs onto the stickers with a Sharpie.
That’s another thing: to Steve’s mild surprise, Eddie and Robin have been getting along like a house on fire.
“I really wish I’d known him in high school,” says Robin, slicing bell peppers for dinner. “I think it would’ve made Hawkins a lot more bearable.”
Steve doesn’t really remember Eddie at all from school, which is probably a really good thing.
He can’t imagine the guy he was back then being this obsessed with Eddie. Well, no, that’s not true. He can imagine it, but he’d have been such a jackass about it. Probably would’ve fucked a few girls about it. Maybe would’ve even bullied Eddie about it.
“Did you come out to him yet?” Steve asks Robin.
Robin leans all the way out the kitchen door, practically horizontal. Steve grabs the back of her belt so she doesn’t overbalance. “Hey! Hey, Eddie!” she yells.
“What, Buckley!” he yells back.
“I’m gay!”
“Cool, me too!”
She lets Steve’s grip swing her back in, grinning. “Your turn, dingus.”
Steve’s going to. He is. The longer he waits, the more awkward it gets. He’s got nothing to lose. He—
Robin takes him by the shoulders, spins him around, and pushes him out into the living room.
“Uh,” he says. “I’m—bisexual.”
Eddie actually does, like, a full-body twitch; his eyebrows climb practically to his hairline for a second, and he sets down his book.
“I’m…very proud of you? Thank you for telling me?”
“Why are you being weirder about me than Robin,” says Steve, annoyed.
“Because you’re being weirder about it than Robin was! I don’t know, I don’t have a lot of practice with, uh, this. Also, Robin was a band geek who dressed like Annie Hall, and you were—popular.” He draws out popular like it’s got three key changes in it, waving his hands in the air.
“Yeah, okay,” Steve huffs. “Sorry I wasn’t, like, alternative enough to be a real queer.”
“No, c’mon, Steve, I didn’t mean it like that. I accept you! Buckley, get in here and accept Steve with me.”
“Ste-eve Harrington,” Robin sings out, wandering out of the kitchen to wrap her arms around Steve’s waist. “We accept you and your beautiful bisexual soul.”
“Thanks,” says Steve dryly.
Eddie points at him. “Feel accepted.”
“I feel accepted,” Steve says; daring, he holds out an arm, and Eddie hops up to let Steve pull him into the hug too.
“Good,” says Eddie into Steve’s shoulder. “You should be.”
#steddie#fic: wait for the season to come back to me#I'd been slogging through angst and complaining about it#and today I was like. but what if I didn't tho.#what if I just wrote about the vaguely weird coming-out you do when you spend most of your time in queernormative spaces#and you already kind of know about the other person even if nothing's been officially confirmed#I've literally said 'samesies' to a coming-out bc I'm the woooorst#the other day a straight friend asked me 'when did you come out'#and I was like...this morning. yesterday. last year. twenty years ago.#also I feel I have been focusing too much on the pathos of this story and not enough on vampire shenanigans#I'm making the executive decision not to care about tonal shifts
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i cannot stand those quirky overly-friendly-to-the-point-of-crossing-boundaries teachers and professors who make you do icebreakers or fun facts about yourself at the beginning of the semester bc their questions are always the exact sort of stuff that you never wanna answer. but they just keep asking bc they think you’re just being shy and cute. ‘what are your hobbies? what kind of music do you like? what’s a topic very personal and important to you?’ MAN i am not subjecting myself to public humiliation like that for being very far removed from the norm nor am i opening up about my deep-seated personal problems. i don’t know you i don’t respect you you are not entitled to anything outside of my graded work. i’m just trying to prevent everybody in the room including you and i from becoming incredibly uncomfortable. just take the hint when i deflect your questions and pretend to be boring
#my sociology professor was asking us all for our current favorite song to add to the class playlist that he plays a bit from every morning#even if i had a single favorite song i wouldn’t tell him#even if he wasn’t gonna play it in front of others i wouldn’t tell him#he was like ‘ahhh what a diverse and fascinating sample of different genres we’ve collected here from your responses!’#three taylor swift songs. some respectable rock and rap stuff. basically it#i am not about to submit my japanese robots singing about the most unhinged and frightening topics known to man#some of us actually got bullied as children and learned to never be honest ever again especially not when we don’t have friends with us#i could explain to him why i like the things i like#but i’m not about to be that vulnerable?? hello???? i already know he wouldn’t understand or care even if he didn’t say anything mean#ok hot take but i actually kinda don’t like the discourse surrounding infodumping#like ‘it’s ok to just talk at me about the things you like! :)’ ok but if i don’t have clear confirmation that you like it too#then it feels like you’re just listening to me out of pity#you could be as nice as possible but if you don’t ask followup questions or express any sort of favorite part or interesting detail#i will feel awful and be like ok never doing that again#maybe that’s just my personal flavor of mental illness#i never got like. told to shut up or anything when talking#but i did get the awkward silence or ‘light-hearted’ mockery#so i figured shutting myself up was for the best#peach rambles
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i keep wondering why and how people live. like, what reason do you have to keep going, why and how do people not just constantly want to die. but i learned not to ask bc it just makes me sadder
#also i usually have follow up questions but i feel like I'm annoying the other person when i ask them#eh. most answers are some variation of ''[people in their life] would be sad'' anyway#but I'm very much past that point bc i gave everyone in my life enough time to grieve over me already#so. no answer is ever really helpful. hence making me sadder bc it's like. confirming what i already know#. idk if sadder is the right word. but english doesn't have a word for מיואש unfortunately. maybe just 'full of despair' which is meh :/
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Upon further examination, I am leaning more and more into Otto being a nonbinary egg opposed to a nonbinary person who uses he/him pronouns. Thanks for the help Mi-ma <3
#rat rambles#oni posting#she reffers to them as 'that nice young man' in one of her journal entries which is what tipped the scale for me#like its obviously possible that granny assumed incorrectly but given how much otto likes her Im inclined to believe shed know if they#were openly nonbinary especially given how personal otto has been with her already#but rly its mostly that combined with the other big thing that makes me feel that they probably were an egg at the time#so I shallst continue to use they/them for otto unless I find a new log that explicitly confirms their preffered pronouns#nothing short of otto saying out loud yeah Im not a man but I still wanna go by the same stuff will fully convince me#bonus points if they talk abt it with dr.holland so that he can make his gender identity clear too#also to be clear there are no mi-ma transphobia allegations to be found here I just think she doesnt know#she has so fucking many nonbinary coworkers and at least one of them is also on the older end and has been at the company for a while#plus I doubt theyre putting transphobia in the colony survival game like imagine if dont starve characters called eachother slurs#so no mi-ma slander shall be tollerated also she is trans (2 Me)#shes literally named mi-ma you cannot convince me she is cis#she is such a silly billy I wish so bad that she showed up in more logs#maybe even given an official full name drop to clear up any doubts#given her whole character is being old and mi-ma's whole thing is being the old one its like 99%#but technically speaking we never do get a full name just last name and first initial#so very technically speaking she could be one of the other 3 available m named guys but its highly unlikely#as in the other options are meep max and marie and no way in hell it's any of them#theyre all young chaps and theres only one hashtag woman in their ranks along with a nonbinary person and a hashtag man#so basically yeah its mi-ma there's no way in hell its not mi-ma
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taking a creative writing intro course this fall and i’m so, so excited!!!!
#.txt#it definitely wasn't in the books but the other two courses i had slotted aren't going to work until the spring so i chose it as a filler#and then got really attached to it#first had to submit to the humiliating ordeal of confirming it was a personal interest course to my advisor but she was chill with it haha#(bc she was pushing for me to take another course that's only offered in the fall but i said maybe next year because i'm already taking two#other language courses) (it's too complicated for the tags)#i'm just genuinely so so excited#hoping it will consistently inspire me to write + i'll feel a little more learned#since i loved creative writing in high school but the first year of college was just crazy insane busy (which is kind of the vibe for my#future endeavors as well because almost full time work full time school ahahah)#of course scared that i'll have hardcore imposter syndrome and everyone else will be better writers and talented and passionate#which i want! but it also makes me feel a sort of weird vibe idk i know i'm good at writing. but the technical aspect is tricky#plus there's also weird feelings about childhood dreams -#as in i always wanted to be a writer but i learned to bite down on that dream because obviously it wasn't going to work out#so sometimes i feel like i failed myself by giving up on my dream even though i didn't really?#because studying something else was the practical choice for ensuring i have more prospects for career etc#plus i do like what i'm studying now#but writing was just what i always wanted you know#so i guess i can reclaim it a little now#school starts in two days though. haha *dies*
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