Tumgik
#just because I’m doing it doesn’t mean it’s good though LMAO
ur-loser-gf · 2 days
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My intro!!!!!!!
hewo!!! im ur loser gf who asks way too many stupid questions:3
(i looked up online where a place like this is and tumblr showed up! im new to it but i did my research and i do hope i can make a new home here:) i heard thats lots of young girls go here to get attention so im sorry if im not welcome!
also imSOO sorry my into is so long im new to this! i tried to make it pretty though!
me - 🌸
this account - 🌺
rules - 🌹
Me!
🌸 name: worthless excuses like me don’t get names:(
🌸 age: biologically 18 but i haven’t been keeping track and i’m stupider than a 9 year old >~<
🌸 location: im from the west but i belong in my room where no one can see me!
🌸 pronouns/gender: im female but im not good enough to be an actual woman, stupid things like me don’t have genders, so it/it’s pronouns are fitting and the best for me!:)
🌸 my sexuality: i don’t deserve to be with anyone but im open to anyone of any gender!
🌸 my physical description:
- blondish brown hair
- blue eyes (not the pretty kind, the dead kind)
- white and extremely pale coz i never go outside
- a bit chubby (130 pounds last time i checked) but im on a diet and doing my best to lose weight (tho im still and always will be gross)
- im also 5’5
- i have big boobs but i hate them
- idk how big my ass is but nothing special
- my thighs are pretty thick but not in a good way
🌸 my mental description
- im really stupid and rightfully hate myself for it
- im psychotic, i have anger issues, and borderline personality disorder
- im super obsessive and the more i like someone the more i let them do whatever they want to me
- but also it can be difficult to earn my trust (think of me like a bunny, weak, fragile, and frightened, only im not cute)
- i have an ed and i sh but i don’t like starving anymore because im incredibly malnourished, i also don’t have a way to cut :(
- i have no friends (wonder why lmao) but when i was younger older men online would always be so kind to me! so now i kinda depend on them:P
- i hate me and everyone else (you) should also!
This Account!
🌺 this accounts purpose: this blog is self harm first and lust second! most stuff doesn’t turn me on and i just use it as a way to hurt myself (by either making me uncomfortable or it hurting my feelings, etc)
🌺 purple text: self harm, vents, or anything along that nature that doesn’t involve my lust:)
🌺 pink text: me horny posting, meaning it’s something that actually does turn me on!
🌺all activity is welcome: dms, asks, anons are and always will be open to anything! go off and do whatever you want! just don’t break the rules hehe! but unsolicited dick pics and stuff like that are okay!
🌺 my interests on this account: im open to all kinks! this is just because while i have personal kinks, what i want doesn’t matter and my pain is good! so i have no sexual limits besides maybe a serious form of pain that hurts *other people* that isn’t me, like a misogyny kink for example, im not okay with, only because im not the only one hurt by misogyny! i don’t want anyone else to hurt:( only me, only i deserve to hurt.
🌺 my activity: im active the most after 7 pm, i gotta try n act like im sane, normal, human, and like a girl or else i’ll be found out! (well i rarely go out or talk to ppl but just in case.. im like batman teehee) and i log off at 10 pm (est)
🌺 when i post: because i have soo many thoughts and really don’t wanna spam and bother people:( and because i love schedule and rly like the scheduling/drafting system on tumblr, i put my thoughts into drafts n when im ready (brave enough) i schedule them for a specific time!:) every 30 minutes starting at 7 pm and ending at 10 pm (est) there should be a new post!:D so if im ever inactive but somehow still posting that’s why:)
Rules!
🌹 Ima have to put on a serious face for this but i feel i need to now because im generally bad at boundaries. absolutely NO rule breaking, under any circumstances. i am the holder of this account and i will block you if i deem it absolutely necessary. i don’t have many rules but im EXTREMELY strict when it comes to them (and i’ve tried but there’s no way i’ll be getting rid of them) so best case scenario, rule breakers will only receive a block, thank you for those who abide by the rules i love you:)
🌹 no racism, transphobia, homophobia, xenophobia, or sexism of any kind on my blog, this is a safe place for everyone. an extremely important thing to note is that i hate myself, degrade myself, hurt myself, let others use me, etc *not* because i’m female, but because of who i am as a creature. my sex and gender have nothing to do with it. please respect that simple fact.
🌹i don’t send. i can imagine that if i were to get close to someone i’ll send them any pictures they want (it’s certainly a possibility but it’s hard to gain my trust). so regardless of your reasons, i will not be posting or sending any pictures of myself that include my face or nudity. my body belongs to my future lover (deity) anyway.
🌹i don’t give out other socials. this one is simple, if i want to i’ll give you my discord but it’s highly rare so please don’t ask:)
🌹NO KIDS NO EXCEPTIONS. anyone under 18 is not welcome here it isn’t good for you, it isn’t even good for me.
🌹if you get triggered by any dark topics (drugs, rape, pedophilia, grooming, ed’s, sh, or anything really) please block me, the idea of hurting someone because of this account hurts me genuinely:(
🌹i will likely add more rules in the future but i’ll make sure to blog about it!
🌹 sorry for all the strictness n stuff i don’t like being firm or anything like that but i believe it’s necessary unless i get so overwhelmed and end up deleting my account within days:(
i’ll likely revise my intro in the future!:) please give me tips on how to make it or me better if you have any!<3
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mollysails · 1 month
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and if i went crazy and started translating and adapting the entirety of the beetlejuice musical to spanish, with changes to the jokes that would make sense within the pop culture…
what then
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squuote · 8 months
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I made a post bout the skip button ending a while back and I deleted it a while ago but I desperately wanna redo it cause I’m interested in what others think but man I cannot find the words for it at all lmaoo
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fingertipsmp3 · 2 years
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I fell off the massage table 🙃
#i’m okay! but yeah basically there was a series of unfortunate events#it all started when i decided to wear a sports bra to my massage. it doesn’t open in the back so i had to pull it over my head and be fully#topless. this is already bad since there’s no separate room to disrobe. it’s one small room that also contains my best friend#and the massage therapist. so there’s me and two other people in this room#so i managed to get myself onto the table okay but then i got massaged#and i turned down the glass of water i was offered afterwards because i didn’t want to expose myself while drinking it#so then my friend & the massage therapist were chatting away and i tried to nonchalantly slither off the table and summarily leaned WAY too#far one way and tried to right myself but instead i capsized the whole thing. :(#i didn’t break anything though! and i didn’t set myself or anything else on fire#i didn’t even hurt myself; idk how i managed that. i just was super disoriented afterwards lol#like i really got my legs turned into jelly through the power of aromatherapy massage and then i threw myself on the ground. for WHY#but my muscles do feel better and looser and i feel very relaxed#i will say i think i’m going to have to have a lot of massages before i get used to how ticklish it is because ya girl is touch starved#and i have a specific spot on the left side of my lower back which if you touch it i will try to leap out of my skin#the massage therapist was like ‘do you have anxiety?’ and i was like ‘i mean i do but more than anything else i’m just Deeply ticklish’#anyway. if there’s like.. a method of getting off a massage table that doesn’t involve falling off it i really need to learn what that is#before the next time. i’m definitely going back because i did really enjoy myself but i need to become significantly less clumsy#also i will wear a normal bra. after all of that i still exposed myself and i just… i really didn’t need to lmao#on the bright side i did have an overall good experience. and i didn’t break anything. and my hair smells amazing#so i think overall it went well#personal
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nymphomatique · 9 months
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nerdy, loser miguel so pussy starved and hungry, eating you out with his whole soul, but you just keep degrading him, one hand yanking at his hair and shoving him back down every time he breaches for air and hissing at him because “come on, nerd, you’re the one that begged me for a taste. now do it right or get the fuck out.”
im so normal about this your au is feeding me 🫶🏻
totally not going insane over this ask btw ❤️
cw: munch!miguel makes his return, cunnilingus, fem orgasm, praise, hair pulling, nerd miguel EATS, slight d/s dynamics, one singular slap in the face (sorry)
i can’t like omg imagine his glasses on his head while he’s trying his best to please u :( but you’re his first so he doesn’t know what to do so he tries to lick like he’s seen in the porn videos (which he won’t admit) he watches.
and you’re sooo frustrated because what kind of man doesn’t know where the clit is?? even though miguel means while you won’t stand for it as long as he’s your property!
“been beggin’ to eat my pussy and you’re just waffling down there. pissing me off,” you huff. you grab his head by a handful of his hair and pull him to where his mouth is directly above your clit. “see that? can’t even call you four eyes with your glasses on your head n’all. make sure your mouth stays there. got it?” miguel nods feverishly and looks down expectantly. “you can start again.” you allow him and this time it feels different.
a good different.
you can’t help but you let out a gasp as the expanse of miguel’s tongue licks and sucks on your clit passionately. “f-fuck, you’re doing so good for your mistress right now. keep going.” you breath out, gripping his hair even tighter and pulling him into your sopping wetness.
“taste so good, mmhp,” he moans into you, his hands moving from their place under him to grip at the expanse of your thighs rather tightly. he licks up and down and even sticks his tongue into you, which makes you squeal and close your legs around his head. wordlessly he pushes them apart and pins them down, lifting your pelvis in the process, a small oh! leaving your mouth at his display of strength.
miguel looks at you with a dazed expression on his face before he goes back to licking into your cunt, his nose bumping into your clit as he explores you with his tongue. you can’t control your moans anymore, letting out babbles of “fuuuckkk right there, oh my god miguel- so fucking good for me,” amongst other praises.
“g-gonna come, slow down a bit,” you exhale weakly, feeling the pleasure begin to burn and overwhelm you. but he doesn’t stop, he keeps going as if he’s in a trance, your pulling and pushing at his hair leaving no impression on him.
“oh- oh my god i’m cumming!” you moan out, your whole lower body convulsing. miguel seems to have snapped out of whatever trace he was in and you meet his brown eyes that seem shy once again. his lips are covered in your cum, his cheeks flushed, his skin glowing with the slight sheen of sweat, his hair perfectly tousled thanks to you with his signature black frames sitting atop his head. he has the audacity to ask “d-did i do good?”
you smack him in his face for asking such a stupid fucking question.
you pretend you don’t see his boner after that.
can u tell i got carried away after the first two sentences cus LMAO
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aajjks · 1 year
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pretty baby (m)
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synopsis. you’re just too pretty to resist.
warnings. MATURE. explicit sex, unprotected sex (BE SMART IRL N WRAP IT] yandere themes, praise, marking, overstimulation, kissing, biting, rough toji, TOXIC!TOJI, lovesick toji, sadistic undertones, mentions of crying, he calls you pretty like 100 times lmao, mdni.
disclaimer: this is purely fictional and this is NOT a healthy relationship so please please do NOT ROMANTICISE THIS BEHAVIOUR! triggering themes, viewer discretion is advised!
note. lmao my first explicit smut… i don’t know how I’m feeling about this though…. haha I’m a rookie when it comes to smut so…. don’t expect much!!!! enjoy!!!
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“baby don’t be like that now.” He whispers into your ear, his hot breath fanning right over your neck as you shiver, feeling his large palms dragging down your body,
You can’t speak, he’s too intense for you to handle. The pad of his thumb is pressed against your cheek as you steal a quick glance at his face.
He’s a gorgeous man.
His grey orbs are hazy with lust, a dark hue in them, it makes your skin feel icky. You barely notice when his thumb travels over to your lip, caressing the meat softly.
His fingers are dangerously close to your mouth.
“You look so cute when you pout like this, baby.” He chuckles, “how’re you so fuckin’ pretty hmm?” He leans down to press a kiss on your lips, it’s a quick peck but you can feel yourself getting closer to your high.
“my pretty baby. the prettiest ever!” He groans, burying himself deeper into you, you whimper, his praise is making you feel dizzy.
“You should look at yourself, fuck you’re so pretty that I’m almost not angry at you.”
“could eat you up whole,” he grits his teeth to stop his moaning when he feels you tightening around him, it feels so good.
“Ha you like this huh, baby?” He teases you, you can’t help but mewl when he pinches your nipple gently. “S-Stop!” You are not sure if you mean it though, it almost comes out of your mouth reluctantly, he notices immediately.
“Stop? You want me to stop? I’m not sure if that’s the truth, sweetheart because you’re clenching so hard around me like a slut.” He can be mean, your cheeks feel so hot.
“Yn baby, you wan’to to cum?” He is now merciless with the way he’s fucking you, you want to resist but he makes it so hard.
“can’t hear ya,” your husband is a cruel man, but he fucks you so good that you feel stupid. “y-yes please!” You close your eyes when he lifts your chin up when you try to look down.
Bastard.
“What was it huh? Couldn’t hear you clearly.” He repeats himself once again, nuzzling his face into your neck.
You feel the coldness of his teeth graze your skin.
“You don’t get to cum sweetheart? Do ya know why?” He slams into you so hard that your vision blurs, a loud moan escapes your mouth before you can realise.
“Because you’ve been so bad to me, ignoring me like I’m nothin’ to you?” He’s brutal, Toji bites your neck, sucking on the skin, you know he’s marking you.
He’s so fucking cruel.
“You’re mine, my pretty baby, my fuckin slut!” He growls, his tone is thick, you want to cry because it’s getting too much for you to control.
“P-Please toji!” You beg your husband but he doesn’t respond, his tongue feels so soothing when he licks up his fresh mark on your neck.
“Please what?”
You’re so dizzy with pleasure right now, it hurts but it feels so good.
“You wanna cum? Then tell me who fucks you so good like this huh? Who owns you?”
“Tell me baby and I’ll let you free.”
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meowzfordayz · 5 months
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hashira accidentally touch your chest
Author’s Note: pls and ty enjoy this tidbit of crack-fluff. 😆💖
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hashira accidentally touch your chest
Hashira x Reader
Word Count: ~1,600
CW: explicit language, Fem!Reader, mild sexual content
Suggestion Fulfilled: Can we get all hashira accidently touch y/n's breast
~faqs~
Fyi, “chest” means boob. I was just worried Tumblr would block this post from tags if I included “boob” in the title lmao. 😉
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Shocked 😳😖
“I apologize, [y/n]-san, it won’t happen again!”
Gyomei’s nearly in tears, he feels so terribly 😞
“These things happen!” you promptly assure him, “Besides, you technically won the bout.”
No need to mention that he always wins when training together 🥲
“I cannot accept such a tainted victory.”
“Himejima-san, though I appreciate your concern and respect, there’s truly no issue.”
Meanwhile, Gyomei’s rethinking his entire Breathing Style to ensure he never accidentally touches anyone’s boob(s) again 💀 
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In cold disbelief 😐😐😐
If you don’t say anything, then he won’t say anything
Alternatively, if you do say something, then Obanai will immediately curl up into a ball and die
Spends the rest of his day recalling the fleeting warmth of your breast
He swears his hand doesn’t even get cold, so affected by the heat of your bosom
Your boob must be ✨magical✨
“Iguro-san,” you call out gently, noting his dazed stare, his dinner untouched while he sits crossed legged, “Is something on your mind?”
“No.” 😐😐😐
Well okay then 🙃
“About what happened earlier…”
🫨🫨🫨 <— Obanai is FREAKING OUT
“… Iguro-san, I didn’t mind.”
And then you stand up, take your dishes, and leave
WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEEEAAAN?!?!?!
Good luck finding Obanai tomorrow 🫡 (the poor man’s been pleasantly overwhelmed)
He’ll avoid you for eternity now 😌 (not really, but at least until he can breathe around you again)
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She giggles 🤭
Lol
“Oh my! [y/n]-san, I didn’t mean to touch you so intimately!” 😅
“No worries, it happens.”
Your face may or may not be burning up a storm, but that’s okay!
Mitsuri’s blushing too
A lot 😳
“I hope I didn’t hurt you?!”
Because like, What if I gripped too hard?! 😭
She’s well aware of her own strength
“You barely brushed me, Kanroji-san. I promise!”
Phew!
She grins, relief evident as she bumps her elbow against yours
“Don’t tell anyone, okay? I would be so embarrassed!!!”
“Kanroji-san, our secret is safe with me.”
I wish it would happen again… <— lowkey both of you thinking the same thing 🤪
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As a medical personnel (among other roles), Shinobu accidentally (or even on purpose, depending on where you’re wounded) touching your boob isn’t entirely unreasonable nor unrealistic
Obviously it would be nicer if she was caressing you out of love and affection 😔
And not methodically cleansing then bandaging claw marks that just so happened to cross over your chest 😒
“You should make a full recovery,” she’s all business, “The demon avoided your nipple and didn’t puncture deep enough to affect the functionality of your breast,” fortunately, you’re too exhausted to be embarrassed by her bluntness, “It has a nice shape. I’m glad you survived.”
EXCUSE ME WHAT?!?!?! 😃🫠
Now you’re kinda embarrassed
More so preening, really 🤭
It’s like when a doctor randomly compliments the rhythm of your heart or some other characteristic from a mainly professional POV, but you’re still caught off guard because who tf compliments someone’s kidneys or bowels movements or?????
In your pain hazed delusion, you briefly contemplate somehow getting your other boob injured too… gotta make sure you’re matching in (nice) shape, y’know? 😌
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Kyojuro can be discreet, albeit more so for your sake than his
“I APOLOGIZE! I DID NOT MEAN TO TOUCH YOUR BREAST!” <— how he could react 💀
“Pardon my slip, are you okay?” <— how he actually reacts, because he isn’t entirely lacking in social awareness and decorum 😆
“Oh,” you don’t mean to squeak, but it can’t be helped when the most handsome man you’ve ever known just casually grazed your boob, “I’m fine! Totally fine! Haha!” 🫨😵‍💫🫠
You’ve gotta be more convincing than that, or Kyojuro will never forgive himself 😕
He’s a lil oblivious when it comes to physical attraction
Not like, infantly so, but given this particular circumstance?
He doesn’t realize you’re flustered; he assumes you’re mortified 😖
“You sound decidedly less than fine.”
He’s softer now, worried about startling you 🥺
“I was surprised! But don’t worry! I’m not worried!”
Okaaay, but he’s worried 🥲
“Is there any way I could make amends for my indiscretion?”
Not only is he handsome, but he is such a gentleman 😭😍
“Rengoku-san, there are no amends to be made, I promise. I’m not mad, nor do I feel unhappy or unsafe. I forgive you.”
Your regaining of the ability to speak in complete sentences greatly reassures him 😮‍💨😁
“Ah. Well. I am grateful for your kindness and understanding. It will not happen again.”
Hold up 🧐
Why does she seem… she seems… disappointed? Should I have said it will happen again??
You’ve suddenly given Kyojuro something quite pleasant to ponder 🤔
After all, he isn’t entirely oblivious 😉
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“Are you going to apologize?” Sanemi demands
“For what?” you screech
“For touching my hand with your boob!”
Your eyes roll, “Oh fuck off!”
“I didn’t ask to touch you,” he grunts
“I wouldn’t have given you permission anyway,” you retort 😒
Arms crossing over his bare chest, Sanemi scoffs, “Well I didn’t give mine either!”
“You’re ridiculous. It was an accident.”
You seem genuinely pissed 😬
Sanemi rethinks his approach
“You know I’m joking, right?” 😅
“Nooo,” your sarcasm cuts deep, “I thought you were flirting.” 😐
Uh 😀
Well 😃
Shit 😄
“Fuck you!” 
When in doubt, curse ‘em out 💀
You scowl, confusion lingering as your blood boils, “Fuck you!”
“I said it first.” 🙄
You stalk away, fed up with his antics
#man child #sort of #romantically inept is more like it
As tends to happen with epiphanies, yours doesn’t hit until you’re almost asleep
“WAS THAT MOTHERFUCKER FLIRTING WITH ME???!” 😳🥴😭
Best believe Shinazugawa Sanemi is about to have a Lesson 101 in flirting asap 😤😎
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(assuming you’re older, like, mentor age to Muichiro)
Neither of you make a fuss about it
It’s like accidentally calling your teacher mom 😬
Or grabbing a random person’s hand in the supermarket thinking they’re your parent 🫣
Embarrassing, but not a huge deal — unless you make it one
There’re those three seconds of slow motion Uhh and What just happened and Oops 🫠
And then time speeds up to normal again, you have a quick conversation with your eyes (gosh forbid you speak and bring the unspoken into reality 💀), and it’s over
^^ Alternatively, if Muichiro initiates a conversation to clear the air, then you’re able to have a mature and concise chat that is respectfully and patiently resolved
Embarrassing/accidental encounters are part of growing up
As long as they can be navigated ~safely, there shouldn’t be any lasting harm
⚠️I also want to emphasize that I am talking solely on inarguably accidental/one time incidences⚠️
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Hehehe
Giyuu’s hand is stuck 🫣
Only for like, a fleeting second
But omg 😭
He was already embarrassed, and now he’s triply embarrassed 🫠🫠🫠
“... Tomioka-san?”
You won’t lie; you aren’t especially bothered 🤭
But it is a compromising position to be caught in; Giyuu lowkey crushing you, one of his palms clearly cupping your boob 😬
#wrestling #or something #so maybe this isn’t super realistic #forgive me
You’re about to repeat his name when he finally springs to life, immediately rolling off you, standing abruptly, about to literally sprint away
And then he remembers his manners 🙃
He offers you a hand
His other hand; his boob hand is currently tucked away in his haori
He’s never washing it again
#closet perv
“Thanks,” you smile faintly, accepting his assistance as you lift yourself from the ground
You hope he can’t hear your heartbeat 💓
He definitely can 😶
But can you hear his?
“I don’t think we should train together anymore.”
Giyuu is swift and harsh with his solutions
“Why?”
Your question comes out stiffer than intended
He hesitates, unable to interpret the fear in your tone — the longing
“I always beat you,” he explains lamely, “Don’t you get tired of losing?”
You scoff cheerfully, grinning now as you squeeze his hand
Fuck, we were still holding hands?! <— Giyuu is in shambles 😳
“I could never lose!” you declare, feelings brimming in your throat, spilling onto your tongue, “Not when I’m with you.”
Then we should absolutely stop training together would be the responsible reaction
Attachments are the most dangerous game for a Hashira to play 😕
Instead, Giyuu’s rendered speechless, unable to shake his hand from yours
“Well alright then,” he mutters, stomach churning as he narrowly avoids the warmth in your gaze
In fact, you swear he squeezes back 💓
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“EXCUSE ME! I HAVE A WIFE!” 😤😤😤
“You have three wives.” 🙄
Sputtering, Tengen shrieks, “I already have plenty of breasts to touch!” 
“Tengen,” you glare, not one to back down as you jab a finger into his own chest, “You touched my boob.” 😒
“AND I’M SORRY!” 😭
Much better 😌
“I don’t know what they see in you,” you scoff (you’re also lying, you can see plenty🤭), “They’re gorgeous… and you freak out when you accidentally touch a boob.” 💀
Tengen is 100% pouting now
“I don’t freak out when I touch their boobs,” he huffs
“Well aren’t they lucky.” 😐
“You could be lucky too!”
Tengen starts running 
You give chase
“DID YOU TALK TO THEM ABOUT THIS?” 
Tengen runs faster
“TENGEN!!!!!”
Tengen runs faster and faster
You give up
*insert gasping for air here*
“DO YOUR WIVES KNOW THEY’RE MARRIED TO A COWARD???!!!”
Oh well, you’ll have to visit their estate sometime this week 🙃
You’re sure to get an answer from Hina, Makio, and Suma ☺️
And you can’t wait to see more of Tengen 😏😋
Sorry, sometimes the horny just happens 🥴
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sunrizef1 · 3 months
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What happens in Vegas
Pt 2
Pairing: Charles Leclerc x reader, Max Verstappen x ex!reader A/N: tumblr was determined to mess me up while making this so if it’s wonky pleas tell me 🙏 Warnings: Cheating (not by reader)
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yourusername added to their story
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yourusername
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liked by charles_leclerc maxverstappen and 1,008,989 others
yourusername Love in LV ❤️
tagged: maxverstappen
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user1 they’re so cute 😭
user2 god I’ve seen what you’ve done for others 🙏
maxverstappen ❤️
yourusername ❤️
user3 I’m feeling a y/n race win
user4 I ❤️ LV
user5 Red Bull 🔛🔝
redbullracing our favorite drivers! ❤️💙
liked by yourusername
user6 I’m still mad about Red Bull not letting her pass max last weekend 🙄
user7 she could have like 6 more wins this season if Red Bull didn’t protect max the way they do
user8 and the way Christian refuses to praise her over him in interviews rubs me the wrong way…
user9 100% favoritism
user10 they want to be praised for signing a woman and being inclusive but refuse to actually treat her the way they’d treat a male driver
user11 they treat her like a diversity signing because they think max is good enough to do everything for her when she’s literally top five on the grid 😭
user12 slay
landonorris ew
yourusername lonely
user13 she doesn’t deserve her seat
charles_leclerc 😁
yourusername 😁
user14 ready for another red bull win 🙃
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logansargeant
where u at
I want to go get dinner
yourusername
Ive just woke up like 15 mins ago
u wanna go nobu at Caesars?
I'm over near there rn with a couple people
logansargeant
yea lets do it
What time
yourusername
6 work?
logansargeant
yeah
let's gooooo
yourusername
I'm eating and then going back to sleep at the paddock, I'll drive u over if u want
logansargeant
😁
TWITTER
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INSTAGRAM
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charles_leclerc
who took this lmao
I assume it wasn't max
yourusername
fucking Logan lmao
charles_leclerc
Americans sticking together then? 😂
yourusername
Think he appreciated me giving him a tow at the start lmao
charles_leclerc
I appreciated it too 😅
yourusername
Your welcome haha 😂
Could've sworn I was towing max tho 🧐
charles_leclerc
lol
Ik how they get about you though
If anyone asks, you didn't mean to help me 🫡
yourusername
you get it lol
you going to the afterparty???
charles_leclerc
idk if I'm invited 🧐
it is your party anyway
yourusername
you're always invited
see you there Charlie
charles_leclerc
yes ma'am 🫡
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hijackalx · 4 months
Text
MALE BG3 CHARACTERS EATING OUT F!READER +18
characters included: gale, astarion, wyll, gortash
FEMALE BG3 CHARACTERS
a/n: HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY YALL!!!! your bg3 pookies have a present for you !!!! (hint: it’s head)
ASTARION
you guys already know i’m a pleasure dom astarion truther 😹😹 at the end of the game he is WHIPPED for you. so he enjoys every minute of giving you head
and he’s so good at it. and he knows he’s good at it
well— he’s good at it as long as he has the patience. sometimes he’d just rather make you finish on his cock and you know how he is when he wants something
ANYWAY……. he’s obsessed with the way you taste. and smell. especially when you’re close to/on your period. will literally BEG you to let him eat you out then
can be a little rough when you’re bleeding though. he gets a bit overexcited 😹😹 sometimes he has to stop and bite your thigh to regulate himself, which honestly hurts worse LMAO
will look you in the eyes while he kisses your clit
he basically never breaks eye contact. eye contact is HUGE for him. he’s mostly watching how you react so he can adjust accordingly, but he also loves how intimate it is
SO much praise if you react the way he wants— “thaaat’s it... that’s my girl”. he loves hearing you whimper his name, he could literally get off to that alone. your voice is as sweet as you taste
secretly loves when you reach out to hold his hand lol. he thinks it’s so cute
also loves having to hold your legs open when you start to squirm/try to close them. your thighs will be so bruised after
when you tell him how good it feels he goes “i know, i know” in the sweetest, faux-sympathy tone. he’s cocky with it lmao
immediately goes “come give me a kiss, darling” after you finish and he hasn’t wiped his face off yet. half of him is doing it to tease you and the other half genuinely wants you to kiss him lol
WYLL
i’m going to be honest i think you’re his first
he’s a little nervous to try it but he’s also SO eager. he’s just worried he’s not going to be good at it lol
he needs a lot of praise and reassurance. he’s constantly watching your expressions to see if you like it, but at the same time he doesn’t really know what to do if you don’t 😹
at first he’ll need some direction but he learns so fast. will start out slow and hesitant but eventually just loses himself in the pussy LMAO
gets rock hard from eating you out. the sounds and faces you make drive him crazy, mostly because he’s so eager to please. LOVES to know when he’s doing good
the type to moan into your pussy. probably because he’s grinding into the bed 😹😹
i think he could probably finish just from eating you out
when he gets more confident, he can be a bit of a tease. sometimes he’ll stop to pepper kisses on your thighs so he can hear you beg for him to keep going
he feels bad making you beg for too long though so he gives in pretty quick lol “anything for you, my love” or “your pleas are so beautiful— how could i say no?”
also i think he’ll eventually try to fuck you with his fingers while he eats you out too. once he gets the hang of balancing both it’s MAGICAL
likes to eat you out while you’re standing. something about having your leg propped over his shoulder while looking up at you from his knees does something to him BAD
he usually doesn’t want to overstim you because it feels mean 😹😹 but he will absolutely keep going if you want him to
GORTASH
i don’t think he really ate pussy before he met you LMAO
he seems like he can be a pretty selfish lover— if there’s nothing in it for him then what’s the point?
BUT……….. there’s something about you…….
he feels a little weird the first time he gets the urge to do it. he sticks his fingers in his mouth to clean them after they were inside you…… and when that creamy taste hits his tongue….. boom……. his third eye opens
he’s not super adept at it to start, but he’s got the spirit 😹😹
he literally eats it like he’s STARVING. i’m talking lickin’ and suckin’ on ANYTHING he can put in his mouth. nothing is safe. clit? assaulted. lips? sucked on. hole? tongue-fucked
even when he’s eating you out it’s like he’s doing it for himself LMAO. he just disappears into his own little world
he DOES love your praise though, so that kind of encourages him to try to work it out of you. he needs to hear you tell him how good it feels or it’ll bruise his ego
reaches up to knead a titty while he’s doing it
LOVES to do a bunch of hungry, flat sweeps with his tongue. will also press and hold it against you like that to get you to grind on it. he wants to see how needy you are
will say nasty shit into your pussy. “you taste so fucking good, baby”, “daddy loves this pretty little pussy of yours”. you can feel every vibration from his voice
will want to spit in your mouth after
GALE
i feel like gale is the greatest pussy eater there is. like he basically has no vices when it comes to eating you out
he’s extremely sensitive and receptive so he always knows what to do. sometimes you don’t even have to say anything. he just figures it out
his FAVORITE position is facesitting. eating pussy is a literal hobby to him
he’s SO good with his tongue. he has such good control of it and uses it to absolutely destroy your clit. his switching between circling and flicking will make you finish embarrassingly fast
will overstimulate you if you let him. he’ll keep making you cum on his tongue until your whole body is shaking
also the way his beard feels against your inner thighs/lips…………… magnificent……
since he’s a thigh man he loves to knead/bite/rub on your thighs too. will legit almost bust when you try to close your legs around his head. it’s that serious 😹😹
LOVES when you grind on his face. will grab you by the hips and encourage you to do it. you using his face to get off is so hot to him
likes to stimulate your g-spot with his fingers while simultaneously sucking on your clit. also gets off to all the lewd, wet sounds he creates while he does this
moans and groans like he’s eating a five star meal LMFAO
talks A LOT but it somehow doesn’t get in the way of what he’s doing. most of it is incoherent mumbling along the lines of “so good, so good”— but other than that he tells you how gorgeous/perfect your pussy is. i’m not joking when i say he worships your pussy
he WILL try to make you squirt. he’s in the splash zone for a reason baby
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moonstruckme · 2 months
Note
heya!! i was wondering if you could write a poly!marauders x reader where r stopped smoking..? i’m 6 months clean from smoking nicotine and i haven’t told anyone (you’re the first!! lmao) just incase i break from a stressful day and so i don’t disappoint!! could you maybe write that into the drabble or whatever you do..? tysm if you do, and if you don’t then no worries!!
i love you mae and make sure to take care of yourself and keep being you!!!!
thanks for requesting gorgeous, i really hope you're doing well!! proud of you <3
cw: smoking, reader deals with addiction
poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 936 words
Remus smells like cigarettes. He’s stopped smoking anywhere near you, but you’re sure if you look out the front door you’ll see the telltale smear of ash smashed into the sidewalk from where he’d stamped one out on the way in. The aroma brings longing and self-loathing, the former more potent than the latter, and you find yourself breathing in the fibers of his sweater for a whiff of it. 
Remus doesn’t catch onto the true motivation for your proximity. He takes it for cuddling, adjusting his hold on his book so he can read with one hand while the other wraps around your shoulders, encouraging you closer to his side. Underneath the heady smell of lingering smoke he smells like himself, like cinnamon and oranges, and you try to focus on that as your better sense fogs over and your fingers start itching for a cig. 
“Aha!” Sirius slaps his last card down on the table. 
James blows out a flabbergasted breath, leaning back on his hands on the floor. They’re playing some kids’ card game Remus learned in primary school and unwisely taught them. At first you’d all gotten into it, but after Sirius nearly took your head off for forgetting the rules and playing with two hands (“Sorry, gorgeous, you know I don’t mean anything I say when I’m trying to win…and I could have won, couldn’t I? No, I’m just saying, it’s about the principle—”) you and Remus had bowed out. James and Sirius have retained their obsession for days, each keeping a scoreboard in their own heads that seems to hold them in favor. 
“Angel?” 
You look up, meeting James’ knowing gaze. “Hm?” 
“He asked if you’re getting hungry for dinner,” Remus clues you in, toying with the ends of your hair. 
“Oh, sorry. Um…” You think hard. One of the more irritating things about quitting smoking is that now your appetite never seems to fully die down. You’re ready for your next meal all day long, and so you actually have to think about whether it makes sense for you to have it. “I had some carrots just after I got home, so I could eat whenever you want to.” 
“Alright…” 
You take another deep inhale, telling yourself it’s because Remus smells nice and losing your grasp on self-control all the while. 
“Are you tired?” Remus asks, and you don’t know how you didn’t notice it before, that extra bit of roughness that his voice takes on after he’s been smoking. You’re so envious you could die. “You seem distracted.” 
“I’m good,” you murmur. Though perhaps it’d be better if you did take a nap or something. You’re beginning to feel twitchy. You take in a breath through your nose like you’ve been practicing, letting it out through your mouth. 
“Ah.” Sirius scoots closer to you, laying his cheek on the couch cushion. “You want to have a piece of your gum, sweet thing?” 
You look at him guiltily. Remus makes a soft sound of realization. 
“You’re picking your nails,” Sirius explains, and you look down to see that you are. “I imagine that means you’re craving one.” 
It’s simultaneously sweet and irksome that none of your boyfriends will even say the word cigarette around you anymore. They’re trying to be considerate, you know, but it feels like they think your self-control is so tenuous that just one word could shatter it. You don’t have the heart to tell them. 
“Sorry,” you mumble, getting the pack of gum out of your pocket. Just the act of unwrapping a stick makes you feel instantly better. “I guess I was thinking I wouldn’t need it anymore.” 
“Don’t be sorry,” James says lightly. “I don’t imagine it’s easy, sweetheart, you shouldn’t feel bad about using something to cope. It’s not like having gum hurts anything.” 
You hum, then turn to Remus sheepishly. “I’m really sorry, do you think you might be able to change?” He looks confused. “Your sweater smells like cigarettes,” you explain. 
James gasps as though scandalized and Remus swears, grabbing the neckline of his sweater and tugging it off. He tosses it into the hall. 
“M’sorry, dove.” He takes your head between his hands, mushing a kiss into your hair. He’s now bare-chested, and you laugh at the dramatics, totally unexpected from him. “I didn’t realize. Is it better now?” 
“Yeah, thanks.” 
He drops another kiss on your head, remorseful. “Alright, I’ll go grab something else to wear,” he says, starting to stand. Both Sirius and James protest loudly. 
“I think what you’re wearing now looks great,” says James. 
“Yeah,” Sirius seconds, “stay in that.” 
Remus looks down at his shirtless torso, raising an eyebrow at the other boys. You can see the amusement dancing in his eyes. 
“Really?” he asks. 
“Come on, it’s not like the fucking Pope’s coming over,” Sirius says, looking well below your boyfriend’s eyes with unabashed enthusiasm. “Tell him, gorgeous.” 
Remus turns his gaze on you. You curl in on yourself slightly, shrugging your shoulders. “This is the best distraction I’ve had all day,” you say quietly, and James’ laughter booms off the walls. 
“Fair enough.” Remus rolls his eyes, grinning as he sits back down on the couch beside you. You get comfy like you were against his side, now smelling only him. He drapes his arm across your back, settling a hand on your hip. “The lows I stoop to for you, hm?” 
“If you’re not up to the task,” Sirius says, “just say the word. I’d be happy to take her off your hands.” 
“Fuck off,” Remus says, and tugs you closer.
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theemissuniverse · 8 months
Text
ARE THEY SLAPPING YOUR ASS OR ARE THEY KISSING YOUR FOREHEAD? MK MALE CHARACTERS
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SUMMARY : I think the title is self explanatory
A/N: I just thought it was funny lmao
WARNINGS : (MDNI) mentions of intimacy
MASTERLIST
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MORTAL KOMBAT 1 CHARACTERS
Liu Kang is definitely kissing your forehead. He finds the simple kiss to be more intimate than anything. But if you’re into him slapping your ass, he’ll definitely do it. He just doesn’t understand how that’s a sign for affection. (It’s funny because he’s technically an Earthrealmer himself but he still does not understand mortal customs of showing affection.)
Kissing your forehead: “I love you so much, my love.”
Slapping your ass: “You’re playing with fire, love.”
Raiden would very much want to slap your ass but he’s way too shy to do that with you so he’ll settle with kissing your forehead. Raiden has been caught staring at your ass several times and when you point it out to him, he smiles embarrassed and mumbles a “I’m sorry.” It is very rare Raiden will slap your ass and when he does it’s a soft but efficient smack.
Kissing your forehead: “How are you doing, beautiful?”
Slapping your ass: “Okay. I liked doing it. Stop asking me now.”
Johnny Cage is one hundred percent slapping your ass. Without question. 24/7. 365. All day. Every day. It’s literally his sign for affection. He doesn’t have a problem with kissing you on the forehead but that’s when he’s feeling more sappy.
Kissing your forehead: “Aw does my big baby want a kiss?”
Slapping your ass: “Whew! I’m never getting tired of that.”
Kung Lao is hitting you with a combo. He’ll definitely come up to you and give you the biggest kiss on the forehead before then slapping your ass. Sometimes it catches you off guard (even though it really shouldn’t at this point) and he’ll just laugh at you.
Kissing your forehead: “You look so good.”
Slapping your ass: “But this looks even better.”
Kenshi Takahashi is doing both. He loves touching all over your body. (Especially if he is blind.) So, he’ll settle for any type of touch that can show you his affection towards you. He wished he wasn’t blind though so when he does slap your ass he can see the recoil.
Kissing your forehead: “My love is always strong with you.”
Slapping your ass: “You’re so naughty.”
Bi-Han is not a physical person by any means. So, that means he’s really not doing either. If he’s in an emotional mood or if you’re in one, he’ll kiss your head. Sometimes on rare days when Bi-Han is in a playful mood, he’ll slap your ass playfully but he really doesn’t show his love through physical affection.
Kissing your forehead: “Do you need something?”
Slapping your ass: “Don’t get use to that.”
Syzoth does not understand the mortal custom of slapping your ass as a sign of affection but he quickly catches on. In fact, he likes it more than kissing your forehead but he’ll always save room for kissing your forehead. He likes to call them “love taps.”
Kissing your forehead: “What do you want to do today, my love?”
Slapping your ass: “You look so good when you bend over like that.”
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MORTAL KOMBAT 11 CHARACTERS
Shao Kahn is most definitely slapping your ass without question. He loves it. He has to be careful when he does it though because his hands are far bigger than what you’re used to. Sometimes when you’re in an emotional mood, Shao Kahn will kiss you on the forehead but he mostly slaps your ass to show his affection.
Kissing your forehead: “You need to rest, my Empress.”
Slapping your ass: “All of this is mine.”
Hanzo Hasashi doesn’t really get the point of it at first but he does catch on rather quick. He’ll slap it through out the day and kiss your forehead and neck while doing it. But mainly when he does it, he’s trying to get intimate with you.
Kissing your forehead: “Nobody is more gorgeous than you.”
Slapping your ass: “Do you want to take this to the bedroom?”
Nightwolf is kissing your forehead. He doesn’t understand how slapping your ass is a sign of affection in the slightest. In fact, he’ll look at men weird for doing it to their significant others and you can’t help but laugh at his reaction every time. If you like it though, he’ll do it.
Kissing your forehead: “My love.”
Slapping your ass: “I still don’t understand why you’re into that.”
Kano will always do it with no shame. He doesn’t care if you’re in private or around people. He’s doing it. He loves watching you simply bend over and when you bend over, he’s right on top of you. He’ll kiss your forehead when he feels tired or sleepy though.
Kissing your forehead: “Goodmorning, love.”
Slapping your ass: “Damn, baby. Just how I like to start my day.”
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MORTAL KOMBAT X CHARACTERS
Takeda Takahashi mainly likes slapping your ass but he’ll also kiss your forehead. Usually he’s very playful and just slaps it. Sometimes he’ll just slap it out of nowhere which catches you off guard. He’ll kiss your forehead though but it’s like a million kisses on the forehead.
Kissing your forehead: “You’re so pretty.”
Slapping your ass: “I can’t help that it’s staring at me.”
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MORTAL KOMBAT 9 CHARACTERS
Cyrax likes to slap your ass but it’s quick and it’s more of a form of goodbye. But when you’re intimate, be prepared to get it smacked repeatedly. He’ll kiss your forehead as a sorry for maybe how hard he’s smacking it but he really likes to.
Kissing your forehead: “Did I do it too rough?”
Slapping your ass: “God, you look so good.”
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annarubys · 2 years
Text
i love to dunk on florida and be a hater but as soon as i see someone else do it i’m like well actually that’s a really culturally insensitive take and you should shut up maybe 😠
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snailmail444 · 5 months
Note
ohhh, can you do hcs for what the sdv bachelors say during sex?
Bachelor Volume Headcannons
18+ 🌱 NSFW 🌱 MDNI
PART II of the double feature!!! Happy New Year lmao I hope you enjoy this filth 😈 shoutout to @hopefuloverfury who did a HOT bachelor volume headcannon list very recently that I ate UP. Check that out Here
Poll said post as you finish and I had this finished so here you are everyone. As always, MDNI, NSFW content under the cut.
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Harvey-
💚 Kinda loud, tbh.
💚 I envision him as captain dad noise already, so I think during sex it carries over and he’s groaning and grunting these hot gravelly moans.
💚 Genuinely. I could go on about the sounds this man is sure to make. Because DAMN. Somebody get him into ASMR sex audios he’d make a fortune.
💚 Now that said I don’t see him as much of a dirty talker.
💚 It doesn’t come naturally to him. He’ll do a bit and try his best to appease you if you’re into it, and he’s definitely a person who could learn, but it’s never been easy for him and won’t be.
💚 Gets too in his head about if what he said was hot or if it was weird. Takes him out of it worrying that he’s taken you out of it. Which, relatable.
💚 But he does know through empirical evidence that his sex noises are hot, so he doesn’t hold back. Especially if you two are going at it rough, or you’re sucking him off, it’s obscene.
💚 Will praise you with that same sultry rasp, because that’s another thing he thinks is safely in the always-hot category.
💚 Such a good job baby, feels so good, etc. Can never go wrong.
💚 Loud to the point his voice cracks when he cums 😇
Elliott-
❤️ My hot take is that I think Elliott would say the filthiest things you’ve ever heard during sex.
❤️ HEAR ME OUT!!!
❤️ I just think that as a man who is incredibly well read he knows what’s hot. And he’s not afraid to say it, either.
❤️ Especially with some of those dime novels that are his guilty pleasure, he’s picked up a thing or two.
❤️ Of course it’s still in a very Elliott way, but he’s a dirty talk king.
❤️ He’ll be worshiping your body while he details everything he wants to do to you. How he’s going to mark you with hickies where everybody can see that you’re his, how hard he’s going to ravage you with his cock, how many times he’s going to make you cum, etc.
❤️ Matches it with equal praise and romantic lines, too. It’s all about balance, and he wants to fuck you like a beast while still reminding you that you’re precious to him.
❤️ Grunts and huffs and moans, but not a lot unless he’s right about to cum. Man’s got more important uses for his mouth!!
❤️ Kind of irrelevant, but I see him as the type to passionately fuck you against the door to his cabin or overtop his writing desk or deep into the mattress. It’s not often that the furniture isn’t creaking and knocking in time to his thrusts.
Alex-
🤎 Okay so another hot take. But I think Alex is secretly incredibly shy and romantic.
🤎 Empirical evidence includes: his heart events imply that he puts on the machismo front as a defense mechanism, and he was raised by the most lovey-dovey old people you’ve ever seen.
🤎 SO. I think he would be very sweet in the way he talks in bed.
🤎 Lots of softness and nerves, but he’s still kinda noisy.
🤎 Tries to muffle himself because he’s embarrassed about making too much noise, but he can’t help it.
🤎 He’ll be about to tell you how good you’re doing, how much he loves it, and his words will warp off into a whimper because it’s too much.
🤎 I feel very strongly that he is a whimperer. I’m sorry. It makes sense.
🤎 Especially with his insane physical endurance he ends up overstimulating himself because he can’t get enough.
🤎 Like he can go a third round, sure, but he’s overstimulated and his voice is cracking and his cheeks are bright pink with exertion.
🤎 Lowkey he’d love it though I mean let’s be real. Let’s be so real. He wants to come until he’s crying. And he will.
🤎 Please don’t come for me abt this it’s just my take.
Shane-
💙 The curse words. The curse words.
💙 Listen. This man is already somebody who swears a lot so in bed? He’s letting FLY.
💙 Fuck that’s so good, you’re so goddamn tight, holy shit that’s hot, et cetera.
💙 Not much for moans but he does grunt so like. Same difference?
💙 Like it’s not that he’s stifling himself he just grunts and groans and swears instead of moans
💙 No whimpering I’m afraid 😔
💙 But he makes UP in dirty talk good lord.
💙Since he’s not a mean person just prickly from his defenses he’s well practiced in being mean even when he’s not.
💙 So ladies gentlemen and those of us that know better, we’ve got the makings of the PERFECT mean dom
💙 Dirty little slut, you’re so fuckin’ pathetic for it, beg on your knees just for the privilege, I could Go On.
💙 Only like that if you want it of course, but like with his gravelly sex voice asking if you think you’ve earned the right to cum yet? Somebody take me AWAY.
💙 Cums with a bit of a yell.
Sam-
🩷 It’s been said before I know.
🩷 But I must also agree. Sam is the loudest in bed. Far and away.
🩷 Good LUCK getting him to shut up honestly, between his whines and whimpers and moans he’s either apologizing for his lack of control or thanking you profusely for letting him hit.
🩷 Because Sam genuinely can’t control himself when he’s fucking half his vocabulary consists of sorry. He wanted to do it slow and sweet, but fuck, you’re so hot and tight around his cock he’s pounding you instead and he’s really sorry but he just can’t help himself.
🩷 I don’t see him swearing much tbh, not unless he’s completely fuck drunk. If he’s not babbling some pseudo-polite good boy nonsense, he’s whining. Maybe the stray shit or fuck, but not to excess.
🩷 Also throws in a ton of compliments. You’re so hot, you feel so good, you sound so beautiful, and so on. I just see him as an open complimenter, and when his mental circuit board is on overload he’s unable to stop himself.
🩷 Gag this man. Do it. I dare you.
🩷 He’ll be moaning and whimpering and drooling all around the gag, his eyebrows drawn up and in, eyes pleading for you to let him moan properly.
🩷 The most pathetic man you’ve ever seen and all because he can’t whine for you. God somebody just take me away, lock me up.
Sebastian-
🖤 King of being amused by how turned on you are.
🖤 He’s chuckling, huffing, asking incredulous rhetorical questions like “yeah? Already?”
🖤 I could see him falling hard and fast, so he’s probably using his dry sense of humor to hide how fucking gone he already is.
🖤 Because emotional vulnerability isn’t his thing so it gives him some distance while still allowing him to enjoy how fucking hot and adorable everything you do is.
🖤 As far as his own sounds, though, he’s not moaning or whining a whole lot.
🖤 He does whisper a lot of swear words, and he’s HEAVY on the panting, as a consolation prize.
🖤 Dirty talk gets a little spicy with him just because he lives to tease. He’s not the heaviest dirty talker even on this list, but he can definitely turn up the heat.
🖤 Lowkey I can see him being a hand holder because he can’t help himself. He can only keep his affections at bay so much.
🖤 And I bring that up only because he’d lose his breath the moment your fingers twined with his and reward you with a soft, stuttering moan.
🖤 Definitely bites you to keep from making noise when he comes. He’d probably end up whining if he didn’t.
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armysantiny · 3 months
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-[chan; soft bf headcanon
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P: Chan x gender neutral reader | G: fluff, headcanon | Inc: graphic designer!reader, getting together, friends to lovers, the rest of skz being (lovingly) fed up, date nights, late night walks | Wc: 503 | W: none iirc | R: G
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My favourite single father of seven/j
Meeting Chan was almost fate, honestly
You’re a graphic designer and happen to love designing album covers
Stray Kids were finishing up an album and needed a graphic designer to help create the album covers
Lo and behold~
You and Chan meet!
Bonding during meeting after meeting while the creative process goes about working its magic
The bonding sessions turn into dropping by each other’s workspace
By which I mean you  visiting Chan’s studio pretty much every time you have a lunch break and bringing a snack with you
Which he greatly appreciates <3
Because he never leaves that room/j
The speed at which you two become best friends is impeccable
Very much a duo – especially the kind that are always seen hanging out together
The feelings start not too long after too
There is one problem though... you’re both oblivious
Painfully oblivious
Somehow you both can’t see that the other is head over heels, and it doesn’t take long for the rest of skz to start taking matters into their own hands
They love you, really, but the running around in circles is going to drive them a little mad
Just a little :D
They keep trying to bash hints over your heads
Which is ironic because the confession happens so quickly
Catches everyone off guard fr
The two of you are hanging out late and it gets blurted out
Cue quick discussion over what you want in a relationship and boom—
Y’all are a couple now! Everyone liked that
Chan being your boyfriend comes with seven other people because none of these men know what the meaning of the phrase personal space is
Baby I don’t make the rules here, this is just the truth
You take it in stride though, which Chan appreciates
Oh yeah, and this man is a hugger
A certified cuddler I’m telling you
I’m convinced he needs his arms around you for thirty minutes a day, every day, at least
Will have you sit in his lap while he works so he can get his daily y/n cuddles
Try to move and watch him whine I swear—
Do you not want his affection anymore??/j
Lmao but despite how busy the both of you are, date nights are wonderful
He plans dinner reservations on days you’re both free and refuses to listen to anyone asking him to work
Date nights are for the two of you and the two of you only <33
Walks hand-in-hand with you after dinner and you stop by a few stalls
If you happen to pass by an arcade, he’s gonna win you a plushie from the claw machine
Sure he spends a little too much on it, but it’s all good fun
Especially worth it to see your face when he does win a plushie
And sure, your friends are more than happy that you’re dating Chan
But they are a little jealous
Because who doesn’t want a relationship like yours
You lucky darling, you~
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fingertipsmp3 · 1 year
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Does anyone else’s mom seemingly want them to dress like a Mormon child bride or is it just mine
#every single one of my dresses is apparently ‘too short’ or ‘shows too much cleavage’#and the cleavage thing is subjective anyway but most of all NO ONE MINDS#i have great boobs. shut up. i’ll put on a scarf if i sense i’ve walked into somewhere where people should be dressing modestly#the too short thing though.. she is fully gaslighting me because she doesn’t want me to wear these dresses#like tell me why the other day i wore this one dress and she was like ‘no that’s way too short’#so i argued with her for a bit and then changed into another dress (that is longer than that one but that she’s previously said is too short#and she was like ‘that’s perfect’ lmao. like make it make sense??????#i’ve taught classes in that dress. i’ve gotten high at parties with that dress. i have had tea with somebody’s grandma in that dress#what i have not done in that dress is expose myself#and today… i mean this is just ridiculous. i’m wearing my most conservative dress#it has a v-neck so there is like. two square inches of cleavage#also it’s nearly knee length. i picked it specifically because it nearly hides my knee brace#and why is the first thing she says to me ‘don’t bend over’ like?? i know??? thanks????? i know how dresses work#‘it’s just a bit short is all’ it literally isn’t. i have no idea what you’re talking about#when i tell you this is one of my safest dresses. it’s giving primary school teacher. it’s giving pastor’s wife#it’s giving your grandma waiting for her fiancé to come home from the war#what it’s NOT doing is threatening to expose my underwear. which; btw; is enormous anyway so it’s not like anyone is going to see something?#anyway i’m going swimming today. like does it matter what people see me in beforehand if i’m changing into a swimsuit anyway??#i might change though. :/ i just feel like she’s ruined the dress for me#i was going to wear my long skirt but i don’t have a good shirt to wear with it lol#i might just do a big summer clothes order and put it on my credit card. i literally donated like 3 massive bags of clothes in march#and i’ve bought about 3 pairs of shorts and 2 dresses since then and half of my wardrobe is empty.#i think i can fit in a few things lol. especially since i was planning on throwing away the jeans i had the accident in#because they’re all ripped and torn and covered in blood and it’s just generally a bad memory#like i washed them but it’s still not great. :/#personal
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wonwoonlight · 8 months
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just one day / yoon jeonghan
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⇢ Jeonghan x fem!Reader
⇢ word count: 4.5k
⇢ fluff // angst // nonidol!au // brother's best friend // fake dating!au // they're idiots lmao // not edited nor proofread so pls bear w me lol // cursing and. two? kissing scenes.
⇢ A/N: this has been sitting unfinished in my google drive since... either last year or the beginning of this year lmao. i have always wanted to write brother's best friend and i had this sudden urge to finish it earlier so i did. been some time since i posted a proper fic so, enjoy~
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He must be dreaming.
He must be.
“What?” Jeonghan says just for the sake of saying it.
“I like you.”
“No, you don’t.”
You blink at his firm voice, wondering what kind of situation this is. Sure, you shouldn’t be confessing to your brother’s best friend, but you feel like you’ve been obvious enough and you don’t see why you shouldn’t confess when it’s been eating you inside out.
And, yeah, you didn’t expect him to do anything about your confession (or even say that he likes you back), but you didn’t expect this either.
“What do you mean I don’t?” you frown, looking at him accusingly. “I like you.”
“You don’t, kid.” He sighs, already feeling a headache coming. He’s not stupid, alright, he has enough sense to gather that his best friend’s little sister probably has something on him–a crush, perhaps, but he’s never thought it was real enough for you to feel the need to confess.
It doesn’t help that he is attracted to you, has always been since you’ve gone back from Sydney after finishing university a year ago. He admits he’s always thought you’re attractive, and if he’s being honest, he would’ve asked you out first if not for the fact that you’re literally Joshua Hong’s little sister.
As if it’s not enough that not dating his best friend’s little sister has always been a code he follows, Shua has always been a little too protective as a brother. He’s seen firsthand how the guy scared off some who had the guts to flirt with you, seen how for two decades only two guys had ever been declared good enough to date you (he couldn’t do anything about the flings you had when you were abroad, but at least you’ve always been appreciative of his protectiveness and you never missed to inform him of some guys who were actually trying to get it on with you).
Long story short, Jeonghan does not wish to be on the receiving end of Shua’s scrutinizing eyes regardless of how much he’s actually into you.
“Look, you know me,” he starts when he realizes you’re not backing down. He looks away, pretending to be frustrated, though it’s really just because he thinks he’ll relent if he looks into your eyes a second longer. “I’m not gonna make a good boyfriend and I’m literally your brother’s best friend.”
You don’t seem to care about the first part of his sentence, irked by the fact that him being best friend with Shua would be an obstacle in your way. Shouldn’t it be easier for him to get a seal of approval if he’s already close with your brother? But, then again, Shua probably knows Jeonghan inside out and knowing too much is never a good thing.
“So what?” you say anyway, because if there’s any word that would describe you perfectly, it’s ‘stubborn’. “Why does it matter that you’re his best friend?”
Jeonghan sends you a look, and you pout because you actually get what he means. You know Shua, after all, and as much as you want to condition yourself to believe that Jeonghan would be the person Shua approves of with all his heart, you also know that even if your brother actually approves, he would put him through hell just for the fun of it.
Anyway, this doesn’t tell you at all where Jeonghan actually stands about you.
“So, you don’t like me?” you shoot straight to it, as if Jeonghan wouldn’t be able to hear your heart beating like there’s no tomorrow if he takes even one step closer–as if your ears aren’t hot from saying it out loud. Jeonghan does not need to know how flustered you actually are.
And it works, because he seems to be taken aback by your boldness and you try your best to hide a victory grin at that. You should probably be more grateful that he can’t stand to look at you for more than three seconds; if he had, he would’ve seen the tip of your ears turning red and the speck of blush on your face, which means he could’ve easily taken control of the situation and turned it against you.
His silence encourages you, because if he really doesn’t like you then he would tell you so. As much as Jeonghan is a master of tricks and he’s great at acting, he’s never been good at hiding his feelings.
Jeonghan bites his lip, trying to get a way out of this. Why can’t he just say no and be done with it? Sure, he’s not in love with you or anything (yet?), but it’s a straight out lie to say he’s never seen you that way.
After all, there’s a reason why he’s been avoiding you the past few months. 
You just have to be more daring these days, and as much as he wills himself to behave, there are times when he’s already flirting with you before he knows it. He’s just lucky Shua has never caught you two.
Plus, you’ve taken a liking to wearing a crop top and it’s the absolute death of him.
“Tell you what,” you say before he does. “Date me.”
Jeonghan chokes on nothing, violently coughs that his shoulders are shaking and you actually need to pat his back so he’ll calm down.
“Are you okay?” You ask worriedly, and he’s terribly conscious of your hand on his shoulder and the other on his arm, of the way your brows furrow in concern, of the way your lips are a little ajar and if he moves forward just a little–
“Yeah.” He shakes his head despite the word, then clears his throat and squares his shoulders before he looks the other way around. He doesn’t step away though, and it’s so fucking stupid that he frowns when you do. “Sorry. You were saying?”
“Date me.” You repeat anyway, though you know this is Jeonghan’s way of  giving you an out in case you want to pretend like you didn’t just say that earlier. He opens his mouth, and you can hear what he’s going to say even if he hasn’t said anything so you cut him yet again. “Just for one day.”
“Kid–”
“Stop,” you say firmly, something akin to determination flashes through your eyes that he’s actually taken aback. “Stop calling me that.”
He sighs out your name, but you’re not hearing it because if you back down now you know you won’t have it in you to say this out loud again. You’re fueled by nothing but impulse and you’re not going to let Yoon Jeonghan himself slow you down.
“Han, I see the way you look at me–you’ve gone past seeing me as a kid since I came back from Sydney and it’s been a year since then. I’m not stupid.”
It’s hard to describe the way he looks at you, and he’s not blaming you because he is confused. The mixed feelings bursting in his chest is much too complicated for him to explain. Let alone through words, even his consciousness does not know how to register what he’s feeling.
Your face falls at his silence, and whatever courage that drives you up to this point is starting to ebb little by little. You’re so goddamn stupid–did you really think confessing to him would lift the weight off your shoulders? What made you think Jeonghan would be able to treat you as usual after you confessed?
Didn’t you confess only because it’s heaving you down? Because you thought you’d regret it if you stayed silent?
Then what is this weight on your chest? 
What is this disappointment looming all over your body?
Why the fuck are your eyes pricking with tears?
Still, you stand your ground and square yourself up in front of him. You’ve gone this far. If you’re going to be embarrassing, might as well do it for a reason. 
“Okay,” he breaks his silence, his tone defeated for whatever reason. It’s not discouraging though, more like unsure and maybe a little hopeful, and when you look up, he’s biting his lip in contemplation. “Just one day, right?”
“But you have to actually treat me like I’m your girlfriend.” You push, heart beating both in excitement and fear. Because what if he backs out of nowhere? He’s not that kind of person, but this situation is nothing sort of normal and his consciousness just might get to him if you don’t push him already.
Jeonghan bites his lip, looking at you like you’re a bad idea that he’s caving into. And he’s starting to think that it’s true. But if he’s being honest, he’s not against this at all. He also wants to know how it’d feel like to hold your hands and just listen to you talk without thinking about Shua and whatever that will follow if he ever finds out.
Frankly, one day wouldn’t be enough, but that’s better than nothing, right? And he would never have the guts to propose it himself, he admits, so this is a chance that he knows he wouldn’t get his hands on ever again.
He sighs, praying to every god up there that this won’t backfire on him.
“Okay,” he whispers, more to himself than to you, and then repeats it once again, this time firmer, looking at you straight in the eyes. “Shua’s going on a business trip next week, right?”
You nod.
“I’ll see you next Saturday?”
You bite down your lip so hard that you taste blood to stop yourself from smiling like an idiot.
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Tuesday, 26 July
[14:32] Yoon Jeonghan😠: beach or amusement park
[14:50] ?????
[14:50] its not a surprise?
[14:54] Yoon Jeonghan😠: just pick one, kid
[14:55] 🙄 beach ig
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Thursday, 28 July
[01:11] Yoon Jeonghan😠: festival or night market
[01:12] ?????? sir?? go to sleep??
[01:12] didnt you choose a place alrd???
[01:12] but night market
[01:13] Yoon Jeonghan😠: you go to sleep
Yoon Jeonghan😠 is typing…
Yoon Jeonghan😠 is typing…
[01:17] Yoon Jeonghan😠: good night, kid
[01:18] nightttttt
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Friday, 29 July
[22:20] Yoon Jeonghan😠: wear something light tomorrow, but bring a jacket just in case it gets cold at night
Saturday, 30 July
[00:03] k, boyfriend 😌
[00:03] sorry, i was on the phone with chaeyoung earlier
[00:07] Yoon Jeonghan😠: i really cant with you
[00:07] Yoon Jeonghan😠: and chaeyoung as in vernon’s cousin? your friend from high school?
[00:07] Yoon Jeonghan😠: you still talk to her?
[00:08] yes!! surprised that u rmb her :0
[00:08] and i actually just met her by accident earlier today and we decided to catch up thru the phone bc i had to go somewhere
[00:09] apparently, she’s dating choi seungcheol or smth 👀
Incoming call from Yoon Jeonghan😠 - 00:11
Call ended - 02:27
[02:27] Yoon Jeonghan😠: you fell asleep. night, babe 🤪 see you
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You bite your lip in giddiness as you keep on rereading Jeonghan’s text, like you’re not giddy enough already at the prospect of today.
You fell asleep last night while on the phone with Jeonghan, but whatever curse you were about to dump into yourself for falling asleep during what might be your only chance to be on the phone with Jeonghan during ungodly hours was immediately wiped out when you saw his text.
Yes, you’d flirt with each other from time to time–but never through texts, and the prospect of having a message from him that you can read over and over again some time in the future is both delightful and… sad.
The sudden tug on your heart and consciousness is a little heavy, a reminder that he’s doing that because you asked him to. That whatever’s happening in the span of today is an illusion, one that Jeonghan agrees on creating.
Why, you don’t want to dwell on it too much.
That should be your motto for the day: fuck it.
So what if it was an illusion? Jeonghan agreed and you’re going to make the best out of it. If you’re never going to be Jeonghan’s girlfriend, might as well be shameless and live your teenage (and adult, if you’re being honest) dream and be his girlfriend for the day now so you can stamp it in your memory. You only have today and you’re not going to spend any second thinking about the technicality of it.
As far as you know, Jeonghan is your boyfriend and he’s taking you out for the day.
You jump when your phone pings, the notification on your lockscreen rids you of whatever negativity that was in your mind literally seconds ago as you grin and make your way out of your apartment.
[09:17] Yoon Jeonghan😠: am in the lobby. get ur pretty self here, angel.
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For all you know, the world is plenty unfair. But seeing Jeonghan looking like that with a simple white tee and a faded pair of jeans reminds you just how unfair the world actually is. Like it’s not unfair enough already because he’s not your actual boyfriend.
“Come on, let me take a picture of you,” he says as he softly takes your hand, pulling you up from the mat. “The wind isn’t too strong and you’re looking particularly pretty today.”
You scrunch your nose as you mock annoyance, a failed attempt to mask your blush. Hopefully, Jeonghan would think you’re simply flushed because of the sun and not because of him.
“I don’t like taking pictures.”
“How dare you lie to me.” Jeonghan says without missing a beat. “I know you make Shua take a ton shit pictures of you when you’re out somewhere.”
You pout at this, and as much as you know Jeonghan doesn’t mean anything by it, the mention of your brother isn’t exactly welcome today because his name just reminds you that this isn’t real and he’s a big part of the reason why.
“Can you not talk about my brother?” You say softly, which Jeonghan easily catches even if he’s not sure you mean for him to hear or not. The sadness in your voice is genuine though, and he makes a mental note to stop mentioning Joshua for the rest of the day. He’s starting to question once again if this is the right thing to do even for a day–after all, Joshua is his best friend, and this particular conversation is the exact reason why he’s not supposed to do this.
But he’s promised you he’ll treat you like his girlfriend–perhaps another personal agenda of his because he does want to experience being able to be your boyfriend even for a day. He should’ve thought more before okay-ing your proposal instead of thinking about it right now when you’re in front of him, in a simple white shirt and a black skirt that stops just below the middle of your thigh but somehow still the prettiest he’s ever seen. 
He wonders if this is how you usually dress up for your dates, and something bitter makes it to the tip of his tongue as he thinks about someone else taking you on a date. 
“Sorry. Come on, let’s take a picture together.” His fingers wrap around your wrist to pull you closer before eventually linking them with yours. “You’re very pretty today, have I told you?”
“You have.” You scrunch your nose and pretend to roll your eyes at the sudden sweetness he basks you in even though you’re liking every second of it. “Literally one minute ago.”
“Well, you really do look very beautiful and I want you to know.” He lowers his voice an octave and stares right into your eyes before he eventually bursts out laughing.
“Stop!” You giggle, knowing that he’s doing this on purpose to annoy you. “That’s too fucking cheesy and you know it.”
He laughs along with you, then tightens his fingers in yours like they’re not interlocked already.
“I mean it though.” He whispers one last time, not looking at you this time around because his heart might fucking burst to say it to your face without the faux of messing with you. “You do look beautiful.”
At least you share the sentiment, as you quietly duck your head to hide your smile, whispering a thanks that’s only meant for the two of you.
Jeonghan keeps his end of the bargain, you’re happy to know, as you don’t even think about your brother and the pretense that is your relationship for the rest of the day. You freely flirt with each other, cheeky smile and winks being thrown here and there. His hands never seem to leave you, and you gladly cling on to him even if you don’t need to.
You get ice cream, insist that you want the plain strawberry one only to eventually switch with Jeonghan’s cookies and creams because his looks better. He plays hard to get before giving in to you, but not before swiping ice cream from the side of your lips and licks his thumb like that shit isn’t going to give you a heart attack.
It’s around seven when you both get to the night market not too far from the beach, and you’re both even gigglier than earlier which you didn’t think was possible. Your cheeks hurt from smiling, but you’re the furthest thing from complaining as you continue at whatever dumb jokes Jeonghan throws your way.
The night market isn’t as crowded as you think it would be, but it still is crowded and Jeonghan makes a show of throwing his arm around your shoulder because he ‘doesn’t want to lose you’ and you seem a little cold (which you kinda are).
You elbow him at this, shake your head and pretend like you’re not internally dying from the closeness between the two of you.
“That’s so lame.” You snicker. “Just say you want me close and go.”
“I do want you close.” He whispers unexpectedly, catching you entirely off guard that you trip on your own foot you almost fall on your face. He doesn’t seem to realize you tripped because you’re flustered, which works good for you, and he flicks your forehead as he scolds you to be more careful and goes back to holding your hand.
“Seriously. How are you still so clumsy?”
You don’t like being reprimanded by Jeonghan, because it awfully reminds you that you’re younger than him–that you’re his best friend’s little sister. And as much as you know Jeonghan definitely does not see you as a sister, the implication that he has to see you as one because of the association is very disheartening. 
“Why are you frowning?” He copies the gesture, and you shake your head, telling him it’s nothing. The night is ending, and you don’t want to waste more time thinking about stuff that you can think of tomorrow when you’re not in a time limited relationship with Yoon Jeonghan. “No, tell me–”
“Jeonghan?”
The both of you turn at the call of his name, and your frown deepens as you see Jisoo in front of you, Jeonghan’s ex that he amicably broke up with. The one ex that has always made you feel like shit because she’s everything you’re not and they were such a picture perfect couple that you’re sure they’d go back together someday.
It does not feel good to see her today of all days.
“Oh, hi!” She kindly greets you, her smile way too genuine for you to think she’s just being polite and secretly hates you inside. Gosh. You need to stop watching too many TV dramas. “Joshua’s sister… right?”
There it is again. The reminder that you’re his sister–something you really don’t need to hear today.
“Hi.” You smile awkwardly, and only then remember your hand is still pretty much joined with Jeonghan’s. You don't know how to feel about the fact that his reflex is not to let go of your hand in front of his ex who obviously knows your brother. You try to let go of his hand, but Jeonghan holds on tighter, as if telling you it’s okay and there’s no need to worry about Jisoo.
They share a small chat for a bit before eventually parting, and Jisoo wishes you both a good night, which makes you hate yourself so much for being jealous of the girl when she doesn’t even have an ounce of bad energy towards you.
You try to enjoy the rest of the night, but Jisoo’s appearance just reminds you that this whole thing is pretty much fake. That someone out there is going to be in your place for real–able to hold his hand and just be with him all the time without having to wait for your brother to go on a business trip to even hang out with each other. Without some stupid request and guilt eating them inside out because they’re not supposed to do this.
Trying to be subtle, you put on an act of wanting to visit every stall in the festival and pretend to be tired after about thirty minutes or so. You’re surprised Jeonghan isn’t already tired to begin with, this guy has the battery of a five-years-old phone, you didn’t expect him to actually bring you around until night if you’re being completely honest.
Jeonghan complies when you tell him you’re ready to go home, and you don’t even realize he’s also being weirdly quiet because you’re too deep in your thoughts. And it’s once his car is parked on the parking lot of your apartment building that you finally open your mouth trying to say something–anything.
You want to thank him for today. To thank him for making a memory that you’ll dearly hold on to, for giving you a standard of what a boyfriend is supposed to be even for a day. For fulfilling your dumb request when he doesn’t even have to.
But what comes out of your mouth is something entirely different and you almost want to bash your head against the door of his car right after.
“Whoever’s going to be your girlfriend is very lucky.”
You can hear Jeonghan takes a sharp breath, and you bite your lip to stop yourself from crying because you’re just so fucking stupid like that.
You try to remind yourself that you asked for this. That Jeonghan is doing you a favour and owes you nothing. That you should be thankful you’ve even gotten the chance to play girlfriend with him when he could’ve just embarrassed you and walked away after your proposal.
The deafening silence inside the car is very loud, and you feel like you’re suffocated by things unseen that you just want to get out of the car and take a very deep breath. So you do just that: reach for the door of his car because you can’t take being so close to him anymore.
It’s your fault. You shouldn’t have asked for this. Shouldn’t have asked for a taste of heaven because surely you would want more and you’ll die of thirst right after. Now you’re just going to be awkward with him until god knows when and you’re regretting it already. Fuck, fuck, fuck.
You should’ve been satisfied with your close friendship with him, with loving him from afar. Now you’ve ruined things between you and him and who knows when things will get back to normal? He’ll fucking think of you as pathetic and it’s just going to be pity in his eyes everytime he looks at you now.
“Hey!” Jeonghan jumps in alert the moment you step out of his car, quickly follows through and catches you before you take another step away from him. “What–why are you in such a hurry?”
You look down to your shoes, because you can’t stomach looking at him right now just in case you’ll see what you fear will be reflected in his eyes.
“Hey… Look at me?” He tries once again, tone getting a little helpless. But you shake your head, because you’re sure you’ll start crying if you do and you want to preserve the little dignity you still have in front of him. But Jeonghan doesn’t stop there, he whispers a ‘please?’ and lifts your chin gently so you’ll look at him, his heart breaking when he sees how close you are to tears and his throat closing at how he’s the reason behind all this.
“Thank you.” You brave yourself. It’s the least you can do, because as much as you’re going to grovel for the next few months, you know that this particular memory with Jeonghan will always be dear to your heart and you’ll treasure it forever. “I’m sorry for taking your time and–”
“Ah, fuck it.” You hear him say before he dives into your lips, not minding the way you’re frozen in place out of shock. He hums against your lips, and it’s then that you finally kiss him back, your hands settle over his shoulders and your whole body relaxed under his touch.
When the both of you pull away, you’re a little out of breath and your thoughts all over the place. But there’s a small smile in Jeonghan’s face that gets you mirroring the gesture. He closes his eyes as he places his forehead on yours, and you follow suit, feeling the warmth of his breath on your face.
“It’s… okay for me to do that, right?” He asks, albeit a little too late. You still don’t know what the whole things mean, but you find yourself chuckling, because you honestly would let him do anything to you. But he doesn’t need to know the kind of power he has over you, so you simply nod and let him have his peace.
“Han?” You say after a while. “What does this mean for us?”
Jeonghan stares into your eyes, deep in his own thoughts as if he’s trying to rearrange his words so they don’t stumble out of his mouth like a trainwreck.
“Let’s see where this takes us?”
“But Shua…?”
He presses his lips together and wraps his arms around you, pushing you into his neck as he breathes in your scent.
“Whatever happens, happens.” He decides, already resigning that he can’t possibly let you go now that he knows how it feels like to have you like this. He’ll make your brother understand somehow, but right now, he wants to be with you and savors the little time he has with you before your brother comes back, not even minding the way his phone has been vibrating in his pocket.
[Joshua sent a picture.]
Joshua: heard from Jisoo you’re on a date w my sister??????????????????
Joshua: did you finally get out of your ass and stop being in denial lmaoooooooooooooo
Joshua: just pls be safe
Joshua: she’s still my sister
Joshua: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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