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justagalwhowrites · 3 months

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Yearling - Ch. 32: Promises

Joel adjusts to life in Jackson after his brush with death. A continuation of Yearling ch. 1-31 found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: References to canon-typical violence. Smut :). No use of Y/N. Minors DNI 18+ Only

Length: 9.5k

A/N: Hi y'all. If you're still looking at this fic but have skipped the last few chapters because of spoilers, this is a pretty safe chapter to jump back in at. You do need to understand that Joel was nearly killed in an encounter with an unnamed person while on patrol and that someone was looking for him in particular to have the context for this chapter. If you have any questions, feel free to DM me.

AO3 | Chapter One | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

December, 2027

“No.”

“Baby…”

“I said no, Joel.”

You stalked off to another room and Joel could feel your frustration from where he sat on the couch.

He sighed, debating whether or not to follow you or if he should stay where he was and let you cool off.

It wasn’t the first time the two of you had had this discussion over the last six weeks.

Joel had made significant recovery since the incident in November. His leg had mostly healed, though he still walked with a slight limp. But he could breathe deeply without feeling the burning pain of broken ribs now. And the parts of him the doctors had to cut away so he would survive - part of his liver, part of his intestine, one of his kidneys - no longer constantly hurt to the point of occasional agony. Everything was tolerable now, if not necessarily what it was before.

As a result, he was starting to go a little stir crazy. Admittedly, the doctors hadn’t cleared him for anything too strenuous - though he wondered how much of that was your doing versus theirs - but he wanted to start preparing to go back to the life he had in Jackson. One where he felt fulfilled, like he had his place in the community and a way to contribute.

You, however, weren’t too happy with that plan.

Joel sighed and got up from the couch, the muscle in his leg burning as he did. Things still hurt and pulled at first - and he was sure getting on a horse would be uncomfortable at best - but it would pass. Or he’d get used to it.

Either way, he wasn’t content with continuing to sit in his house and rot.

“Sweetheart,” he said, finding you in the kitchen.

You closed the fridge door with too much force, making the jars of canned produce inside rattle.

“No,” you said, adding milk to a cup of tea on the counter. “Find a place to sit, I don’t want you spilling hot tea all over yourself.”

“I’m not a kid,” he said, a little defensive. “I know perfectly well what I’m capable of…”

“No, you don’t,” you said, leveling him with a glare before returning the milk to the fridge and pointing to his spot at the table. “Now sit.”

Joel squared his jaw for a moment before going for the kitchen table - trying to walk with as little a limp as he could manage even though it fucking hurt - and sitting down there. He took a deep breath as you got the mugs of tea and carried them to the table, setting one in front of him and the other in front of the seat he’d come to think of as yours. You settled in beside him, holding the mug with both hands, seemingly determined to not actually look at him.

“We need to talk about it,” he said gently.

“I’m not going to discuss you going out there to get yourself fucking killed, Joel,” you snapped. “I’m not doing it, I’m not going through that again. End of story.”

Joel tried to remind himself that he wouldn’t feel any differently if he were in your position. He couldn’t blame you for it.

You’d been a mess when he woke up. It had just taken him a few minutes to really realize it.

It was like you couldn’t get close enough to him once you were against him, clinging to him as you tried to not disturb him or put any weight on him. But once he got you settled, you fell asleep quickly.

Joel, however, was wide awake. Part of him was afraid to go to sleep again. He didn’t want to not wake up, he wasn’t confident enough that he would. He wasn’t sure how long he’d been unconscious but it felt like he’d slept enough for a lifetime.

So he just held onto you. He soaked up the feel of you in his arms, a sensation he thought he’d never have again. He tried to pick through the fog of his mind, remember what had happened before, but it felt so far away, nothing but a haze of blood and hurt before your voice was there. After a while, he left it alone.

But you didn’t sleep the way you normally did. At first, you seemed stiff, like you were still conscious enough to be worried about hurting him. That didn’t last too long. Your whole body relaxed, as limp and pliant as you were when he’d just made you come again and again. But you almost never actually found rest that way. Even with Joel beside you, there was part of you that was always tense and ready to defend yourself. A byproduct, he was sure, of years of torment that could strike at any time. You only slept that way when you were at the point of total exhaustion, when your body physically couldn’t be on guard anymore.

As much as he wanted to talk to you - ask you what happened, how you were feeling, how long he’d been like this - he wanted you to rest more. You needed it, your whole body desperate for it. So when his door opened just as the light in the room shifted to the pink and orange of dawn, his hold on you tightened ever so slightly.

Carol, one of the doctors, didn’t even notice him watching her come in at first, nearly jumping out of her skin when she realized that his eyes were open.

“Joel!” She yelped and you stirred ever so slightly against him. He held you tighter.

“Shhh,” he hushed her before whispering, soft and low. “She needs her rest. Don’t think she’s had much of that lately.”

“But…”

“I’m not goin’ anywhere,” he said. “Let ‘er sleep. Can look me over in a bit.”

She rolled her eyes but left all the same and he watched you, lost in you. You’d survived. He remembered being afraid that you wouldn’t but you had, and so had he. He trailed his fingers gently over your exposed skin, marveling at the softness of you, that you loved and trusted him enough to let your softness be this close.

The sun was high when the door opened again, not easing open this time but flying, Ellie tearing into the room in a blur of wild hair and disheveled clothes. The door smacking into the wall made you wake with a jolt and he held you close as he felt that tension shock back into your limbs.

“Joel!” Ellie barreled over to him and he couldn’t help but smile as she skidded to a stop at his bedside as you sat up.

“Hey baby girl.”

“You’re awake,” her voice was thick as she sat down near you at the edge of the bed. “Fuck, I didn’t…”

“Are you OK?” He asked, trying to look her over.

“I’m fine,” she waved him off. “You scared the shit out of me but I’m fine. The doc said I needed to get you to let her look you over? What the fuck, Joel?”

“Joel!” You looked down at him, wide awake now, his head propped up on pillows.

“You needed rest,” he shrugged.

“You needed to be examined by a doctor!” You snapped, unfolding yourself from your place at his side. He tried to hold onto you but you leveled him with a glare. “After everything we did to get you here alive, don’t even start.”

He tried very hard not to laugh.

“Whatever you say, baby.”

He seemed to frustrate you a lot after that. You talked to the doctors more than he did, never leaving his side and listening to everything they said with a hard look on your face. He tried to ask more about what happened to you - he remembered you bleeding and your face was still damaged but healing - but you changed the subject back to him immediately every time.

Joel was ready for things to go back to normal as quickly as he could manage but you were nervous, hesitant. The first time you dared leave him at the clinic, something happened with a horse and Olivia came to get you. It was the third day he was awake and you were gone long enough that he was able to get out of bed and try to walk on his own. He didn’t make it very far, all but falling into a chair near the door after using the wall to haphazardly balance as he went. The chair smacked into the wall and Joel heard scrambling from the hall before Carol threw open the door, her eyes wide and panicky before she saw where Joel had ended up.

“Are you trying to get yourself hurt?” She demanded as she helped him back to bed.

“No,” he said, defensive. “I’m tryin’ to get myself back to normal…”

“Joel, you’re 60 years old…”

“Don’t remind me.”

“…And injuries take time to recover from. You’re not a young man anymore, you can’t push yourself the way you used to.”

“I’m not a young man anymore,” he agreed as she helped lower him to the bed, his body seeming so hulking and large beside hers. “I can’t afford to waste time bein’ useless.”

“Recovery isn’t useless,” she narrowed her eyes at him. “If you’re not going to listen to me then you need to listen to that woman of yours, Joel. Take it easy and don’t do things like get up without someone there to help if you need it.”

Carol was nice enough to not tell you about the fact that he got out of bed and walked to the chair, at least. But she had distinctly sided with you in all matters related to his recovery after that, as had Tommy, Ellie, Maria and Savvy.

It didn’t help that there were clearly conversations happening that no one wanted to tell him about. He heard raised voices from the front room of the clinic one day, you and Ellie going back and forth about something he couldn’t quite make out until there was the sharp boom of Tommy’s voice ending the conversation.

“Care to tell me what that was this afternoon?” He asked as you settled into his side to sleep after Ellie and Tommy had gone home for the night.

“Depends on how pissed off you want to be,” you replied, draping your arm gingerly over his chest and settling in with your head on his shoulder.

“Not gonna piss me off,” he said gently. You had shrugged out of the button down of his that you’d worn that day before climbing in bed, stripped down to the tank top below and he could feel your skin so easily like this, his hand skimming over your bared arm. You pressed yourself closer.

“Yes it is,” you said quietly, stretching and kissing his throat before settling at his side again.

“Can’t go the rest of our lives without shit pissin’ me off, baby,” he said gently. “Don’t think I can handle you treatin’ me like glass the whole time, either.”

“I just worry,” you said softly. “I don’t want to do this without you, can’t give you a damn heart attack because Ellie has some scheme…”

“So it’s Ellie that’s causin’ the trouble,” he said.

You groaned.

“Fine,” you said. “Better not get all worked up and just let me handle it. Trust me when I say I have it, Joel, I really do…”

“Baby.”

You sighed again.

“From what Tommy was conscious for and what little you remember,” you said slowly. “The people who… those people. They were after you. Specifically you. And Ellie… she hasn’t taken kindly to that.”

“Alright…”

“She wants to go find them,” you sighed. “She thinks she can handle it…”

“No,” he said, already moving to get up but you held him down.

“Joel.”

“She’s not doin’ that…”

“I know she’s not,” you said, still holding him in place. “I told you, Tommy and I have it handled.”

“I don’t want her to go after them,” Joel said, letting himself relax back into the mattress and your hold on him eased. “Don’t want any of you putting yourself at risk on some damn fool mission…”

“I know.”

“She needs to get that shit outta her head…”

“I know, Joel.”

He sighed.

“This is such a fuckin’ mess. All of it.”

“It doesn’t matter,” you said quietly, nuzzling in closer to him. “All that matters is you’re alive and you’re here. We’ll figure it out.”

You figuring it out, apparently, just meant keeping Joel under lock and key for the foreseeable future. Your jaw was set tight across the table and you fidgeted with your mug, your thumb tapping out a stuttering rhythm on the handle.

“I need to contribute,” Joel said gently. You glared at him. “Sweetheart…”

“You can contribute without leaving Jackson,” you said. “Your value here isn’t limited to going on fucking patrol…”

“It’s a big part of my value, Baby, yeah,” he said. “I don’t got a lot of skills…”

“You were a contractor before,” you snapped. “You think buildings here don’t need to be repaired? That things don’t need to be constructed? Do that, let them take you out of the patrol rotation.”

“I’m not gonna hide,” he said, trying to get you to look at him even as you seemed bound and determined not to. “I want to get back out there, I want to do my part…”

“Your part doesn’t include getting fucking murdered, Joel!”

“I sure hope it doesn’t,” he reached out and took your hand, his thumb running over your knuckles. “I want to be here, with you, for a good, long time, baby. But I can’t… I can’t be something I’m not. And I’m not someone who just lets other people take on all the risk while he sits at home, on his ass…”

“Joel.”

“You say you love me,” he said. You actually met his eyes with that, glassy and wet at the edges.

“Of course I love you,” you said, not as harsh now. “I love you so goddamn much, I can’t lose you, I can’t, do you understand me?”

“I know, Baby,” he reached out, his large hand cupping your face. “And I’m not planning on going anywhere. But I can’t be the man you love by hidin’ away and waitin’ for trouble to come to someone else. I need to be the one to handle it. Me. I need to take care of my own business, need to look after you, need to take care of our girls. I can’t do that here, acting like I’m not capable of doing my part. I’m going back out there, Baby, and I’d like to do it knowin’ that you’ll still be speaking to me when I get back.”

“You don’t get to ask me to watch you hurt yourself,” your voice was thick. “I will not watch you die, Joel. I’m not going to do it and you don’t get to ask me to.”

“I’m not,” he said gently. “But, Sweetheart, if I am gonna go? I’d like to go out as myself. And that means going back out on patrol.”

Your eyes searched his for a moment before you all but collapsed against his shoulder, your arms snaking up around his neck, a sob cracking through you. He put his arms around you, rocking you gently.

Part of him had been waiting for this to happen. Beyond when he caught you off guard when he first woke up, you’d been nothing but strong and stoic. The only time there was a hint of anything else was when the two of you went to bed at night. You clung to him then, Joel swallowing any hint of hurt you accidentally caused when you held him tight. You breathed him in deep, pressed as much skin to him as you could manage. Sometimes, those deep breaths were shaky ones, like you were trying not to cry. He just held onto you, wishing you’d say something - anything - so he’d know how you were feeling. But you didn’t. So he took care of you the best way he could while you were focused on taking care of him.

“It’s alright,” his hand spread wide over your back, keeping a slow and steady rhythm as it ran up and down your spine. Your tears were racking, choking, making your whole body shake. “You’re OK, I’ve got you, s’alright…”

“I can’t,” you sobbed against him. “I can’t, I can’t… you can’t leave me, Joel, you can’t.”

“M’not gonna leave you, Baby,” he said softly. “I promise you. I’ll always come home to you.”

“You can’t know that,” you sniffed, your sobs calming to sniffles. “Seeing you like that…”

“I know,” he said quietly. He’d seen you nearly dead enough times, he knew. He understood it. “I’m sorry, Baby, I’m so sorry…”

“Then why are you insisting on trying to go back out there,” you sat back from him. “If you understood it, you’d stay here with me and with Ellie and Savvy, you wouldn’t do this. Not to yourself, not to me, not to them…”

“I know,” he said again, looking in your eyes, begging you to understand. “But that girl… she took a lot from me, baby. A few organs, more time than I really want. Almost took my future with you and the girls. Not gonna let her take who I am, too. And I need to go back out there. Not gonna just hide in here, afraid, for the rest of my life.”

Your eyes searched his, wide and wet, and then you sighed.

“I have conditions. If you expect me to be OK with this…”

“Of course,” he said quickly. “What are they?”

“You go out with Tommy or me,” you said. “No one else. I don’t trust you out there with Jesse or fucking Gene…”

“They were tryin’ to do the right thing…”

“The right thing was saving you,” you snapped. “You go out with Tommy or with me or not at all.”

“Alright,” he said. “You or Tommy. At least to start.”

You glared at him for a moment but you pressed on.

“You don’t even think about going out until you’re fully cleared by both doctors,” you said. “None of this second opinion bullshit, they’re both on board or you don’t go.”

“I can do that,” he nodded slowly. “You’re being very reasonable, Baby, I’m impressed…”

“Oh, fuck off.”

He laughed a little and tugged you closer to press a kiss to your temple. You melted into his chest, head nestling against his shoulder so that your nose brushed his neck.

“I promise, I don’t have a death wish,” he said, thumb tracing a path over your arm. “I always want to come home to you. I just need to do this, too.”

“I know,” you said softly. “I’m just… I’m so scared with you. All the time, I’m so afraid. It’s different than with Savvy, I’ve always been afraid with her. Scared I was gonna drop her or accidentally hurt her or not teach her the right thing or teach her too much. Scared I couldn’t save her. She’s my heart just walking around outside my body, I’m used to being afraid with her. But it’s different than how I feel about you and I just… I’ve never loved someone the way I love you and I don’t know how to live with being afraid of losing that.”

He took a deep breath and held you a little tighter.

“Know the feeling.”

It was just a few days to Christmas and preparations were in full swing. The tree was up in the middle of town, lights lined the buildings, Julie had been hoarding supplies for some kind of holiday cocktail that she claimed was a surprise that you were highly skeptical of. You, Ellie and Savvy had picked a tree for his living room just the week before and set it up, Savvy standing back with a slight frown on her face the whole time.

“What’s up, baby girl?” Joel asked, sitting in an arm chair as he watched you and Ellie decorate. His leg wasn’t quite up for standing that much yet.

“It’s just…” She looked at him for a moment and perched on the arm of the chair before looking back at you. “People really did this before? Put trees in their houses?”

“Yeah,” Joel smiled up at her. “They did. Biggest holiday of the year for a lot of the world, trees inside stores and offices and shit, too.”

She crossed her arms, her brows knitting together as she frowned.

“She never did this with me,” she said quietly. “I read about Christmas in a book once but it didn’t talk about this part and she didn’t talk about it much when I asked and… I don’t get it.”

Joel nodded slowly. Savvy was still warming up to you. She seemed skeptical of your motivations, of your intentions, of everything you said. It was hard to tell how much of it was teenaged cynicism and how much was rooted in her feelings of abandonment. But since you’d all but moved into Joel’s house, she’d been around you more and more and you did your best to let her guide it. He could tell how much it was killing you, though. He knew the feeling well, remembering back to the days when Ellie wouldn’t even look at him. He could tell how badly you wanted to cling to her. He saw how much you wanted her to stay close and tell you everything in the way you hung on her every word, the way you watched the door for a full minute after she left to go back to Ellie’s. But you needed her to be OK with it more. That just didn’t make things any easier.

“What did she tell you?” Joel asked, keeping his voice low enough that it wouldn’t rise over the Christmas carols you’d put on the stereo.

“Stuff she did with her parents,” she shrugged. “That her brothers would tease her about being bad… None of this stuff.”

“Well,” Joel said slowly. “Think she told you the important stuff.”

She looked at him, skeptical.

“The important stuff ain’t the decorations, it’s the people,” he said. “She couldn’t give you the other things so she told you about your family. Don’t think she was trying to hide anything from you. She shared with you what mattered.”

She nodded slowly and looked toward the tree again until Ellie turned around and called her over to put an ornament on the tree. You bit your lip as you watched her do it, your eyes wide and soft and you hesitantly put a hand on her shoulder, giving her a squeeze when she stepped back to look at her handiwork.

Joel was steadfastly trying to focus on the holiday instead of the tension that had settled over the town since his attack. Patrols had been ramped up, sending people out in small groups instead of pairs. There were growing signs of people present in the wilderness, more xes on trees and remains of fires. Tommy had told Joel - much to your chagrin - that the prevailing theory was they were marking Jackson territory, the signs always found at the edges of where patrols ran. As though someone was watching for where they could seize power. Everyone was on tenterhooks, waiting for something worse to happen.

But the build up to Christmas seemed to have taken everyone’s minds off the looming threat. Joel was thankful for it. It seemed to have lightened your mood some, too - part of why he decided to bring up the patrol issue yet again.

He didn’t tell you that he was set to see Carol the next day to hopefully get cleared for patrol. And… other activities.

The cruelty of the timing of the attack hadn’t been lost on Joel. He’d just gotten you back, hadn’t even had 12 damn hours with you before he had to leave for patrol and then almost never came back. But he’d lived and, while you’d been close ever since, you weren’t close enough.

He wanted you.

That wasn’t quite right, he always wanted you. He was pretty sure he’d wanted you since the moment he first saw you. He was beyond that now. He needed you so bad he ached with it, his whole fucking body hurt with it sometimes. But you wouldn’t touch him without the doctors saying it was OK. Even though, at this point, he was starting to think it was medically dangerous to be so fucking wanting.

“Are you goin’ to the stables today?” Joel asked, holding you close. You nodded against him. “You think you’ll be done in time for the movie?”

“Definitely,” you said. “Savvy’s never seen a Christmas movie, not missing that.”

He kissed your forehead.

“Been meanin’ to ask you something,” he said.

“Hm.”

“Think you’ll be my date for the dance tomorrow night?” He asked. You pulled back from him and glared, your eyes still red. He smiled a little. “Know I left it to last minute but I’m hoping…”

“Of course I’ll be your date,” you shoved him ever so lightly. “Who else am I gonna go with? Been cooped up here with you for the last month, all my other prospects have given up on me…”

He laughed and kissed you.

“Guess you’ll just have to be my girl, then.”

“Guess so.”

He kissed you again, deeply, firmly. But it was different than so many other kisses he’d shared with you over the past few weeks. There was heat behind it. A twinge of need and want that tasted so familiar on your tongue. You moaned and adjusted so you were closer to him, your body curving, leg hitching up over his so you could press your mound against his thigh. He gripped you tighter, pulled you closer, but you pulled back with a groan.

“Baby,” he breathed but you shook your head.

“Not going to risk hurting you,” you panted.

“Not gonna hurt me…”

“Not sure I trust your judgement,” you gave him a final, chaste, peck on the lips. “I’ll see you tonight, walk over with you and the girls.”

“Have a good day,” he said.

“I will if you take it easy,” you replied, extracting yourself gently from his grip and heading out the door.

He watched you leave and waited for a few minutes to make sure you were gone before he got up, too. It was almost Christmas and there were things he wanted to do.

***

Joel looked far too pleased with himself, his hand on your thigh as you sat beside him at the Tipsy Bison. You had one of Julie’s special cocktails - something she called the Grinch and tasted like mint - and were well on your way to being tipsy for the first time in months.

Savvy and Ellie were sitting with some friends - Dina, Jesse, the boy from school you suspected Savvy had a crush on named Kyle - and looked to be having fun. You hoped Savvy would talk to you about it later. She’d been opening up a little bit more, never fully pulling away like she had for so long. You took what you could get, thankful that she was willing to speak to you at all.

She’d gone with you, Joel and Ellie to the movie the night before. It was Miracle on 34th Street. She seemed to enjoy it, smiling and watching the screen in wonder, soaking it all in. It was bittersweet to see. You’d always wanted to be able to give her these things, the kinds of things you remembered loving as a girl at the holidays. But there was a certain cruelty in it, too. She’d never see a Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, never visit a mall Santa. Jackson brought her closer to the life you’d led as a girl but it was still so far away and it was hard, not being able to share it with her.

But Ellie had talked her into spending Christmas Day with you and Joel. You’d damn near kissed her when she told you and you felt a little like you had as a child on Christmas Eve, the greatest gift you could have ever asked for, spending the day with Savvy, Joel and Ellie all together.

But Joel seemed as excited as you were, a small smile tugging at his lips as you sat across from Tommy and Maria.

“Can’t believe it’s Christmas again,” Maria said, taking a drink of his beer. “Swear, time goes by faster and faster every damn year.”

“I’ll take time goin’ faster as long as that means it’s still goin’,” Joel replied.

“Know that’s right,” Tommy shook his head a little, half smile on his face. “We’re all still standing and after the last year, seems like the best I can ask for.”

“Y’all doing anything special for William this year?” You asked, turning your cocktail glass slowly in your fingers. “He’s getting big enough to know what’s going on now.”

“Santa’s planning to make a visit,” Tommy smiled a little. “He’s been pretty good lately, figure that should be rewarded.”

You smiled back, looking toward Savvy. She was facing the boy on the bench next to her and his fingers traced the outside of her knee and she smiled.

The music changed, the strains of the song familiar. Hallelujah. You looked toward Joel and he smiled a little wider, the change so subtle you doubted anyone but you would notice.

“This is hardly a Christmas song.”

“There’s an argument to be made,” he said. “Heard it on the radio sometimes at Christmastime, it counts.”

He took his hand off your thigh and held it out to you. An offering.

“C’mon, baby,” his eyes were hot on you. “Call it an early Christmas present.”

You put your hand in his and let him lead you to the dance floor. You draped your arms over his shoulders, fingers trailing through his hair as he tugged your body close to his.

“See?” He said, tracing your nose with his. “Not so bad.”

“Helps when you’ve got a good partner,” you smiled a little. “How’s that leg of yours doing?”

“Good as new,” he said. “Definitely isn’t gonna keep me from dancing with you, that’s for damn sure.”

You laughed a little before you nestled your head against his chest, sighing contentedly.

“I’m so glad you’re still here to dance with,” you said quietly as you swayed with him. He gave you a gentle squeeze.

“Me too,” he said softly, almost sadly.

“I feel like I wasted so much time,” you whispered, tears pricking the corners of your eyes and making your throat tight. You got like this a lot lately, this haze of what almost was hanging over you. “I should have known better and…”

“Hey,” he said, pulling back from you just enough to look in your eyes. “You didn’t do anything wrong, didn’t waste anything. I gave you a lot of shit to work through, more than you ever should have had to deal with. You did what you needed to do, s’not a waste.”

“What if I’d lost you?” You asked softly. “What if I never came over that night, what if…”

“What if a lot of things,” he cut you off. “Doesn’t matter. We got here. That’s the important thing.”

He pulled you back against him and you pressed your ear to his chest, listening to his heartbeat.

“Gotta ask,” he said, tone lighter after a moment. “Never had any of those fancy dance classes you had. How do I hold up compared to the guys who did?”

You laughed once, burying your face in his chest for a moment.

“Best partner I ever had,” you said.

He chuckled a little, his lips brushing your forehead.

“Good.”

You held him closer, moving with him slowly on the dance floor for a while. You weren’t sure how long. You let yourself get lost in him. The way he swayed in time to a rhythm your body was more in tune with than your mind, the way he felt so warm as he wrapped around you, the way his heart beat and the rise and fall of his chest were constant and stable. The way he was whole in your arms. It was like you could finally relax into that reality, you’d reached a point that you weren’t just scared anymore. He was here, he wasn’t going to fade away to nothing in the night. His heart would keep beating, his chest would keep rising, you wouldn’t need to find a way to do this without him.

“Ready to go?” He asked softly after what felt like a while. “Want to get you home.”

“Yeah,” you said, separating from him enough to look at him. “Let’s go.”

You went and said your goodbyes to Tommy and Maria and Joel stopped by the girls’ table - scaring the shit out of Kyle by the look of it, Kyle’s eyes wide and terrified - before lacing his fingers with yours for the walk home.

“What did you say to them?” You asked, walking close enough to him that you could feel the slight limp he had now.

“Told ‘em to get home at a reasonable time,” he shrugged. “And no boys behind closed doors. Don’t want that Kyle kid gettin’ any ideas…”

You snorted.

“It looked like you threatened to castrate the boy,” you said. “I don’t want anyone taking advantage of Savvy but I don’t want everyone terrified to date her, either.”

“Didn’t get that specific with it,” Joel said, a little defensive. “Just made it clear that someone was watchin’. And that someone was me.”

You smiled and shook your head a little.

“You’re ridiculous,” you said. “But… thank you. For taking care of my daughter.”

He looked at you, his face serious as you came to a stop at his front walk.

“Course,” he said. “She’s an amazing kid, Bambi. You did a great job with her. And… might not deserve it but… feels like she’s mine, too. Love her like she’s mine. Hope that’s OK.”

You looked at him for a moment, his eyes soft and warm, the lines of his face familiar landscapes. For a moment, it was as though your heart had broken open with him, cracked down to the center because the love you had for him couldn’t be held there anymore. You pulled him close to you, kissing him soft and deep.

Or it started that way, at least. But his body against yours, the sharpness of your love in your chest, the taste of him on your tongue pushed you into desire. It didn’t take much to spark it - it had been so long since you’d had him - but once it was there, it burned hot and fast, swallowing the reminder that you should keep yourself under control quickly.

“C’mon,” Joel said against your lips, breathless. “Let’s go inside.”

You nodded and followed him inside, using the short walk from the street to his front door as a chance to try to get the want that was flaring inside you under control. It was too soon, it had to be too soon and you weren’t going to risk Joel’s health just because you were aching to have him as close as possible.

Joel pulled you back against him as he he closed the door behind the two of you, tilting your head to give him better access to your mouth, his fingertips sinking into your skin as he gripped you tight. You swallowed a moan and tried to keep yourself from giving in even as you pressed yourself closer to him.

“Joel,” you breathed, pulling your lips from his, his hands still holding you against him. “We… we should stop…”

“Don’t need to,” he said, kissing you gently again.

“Joel…”

“Went to the doctor today,” he kissed over the line of your jaw, following the curve of your bones up to your temple where his lips lingered. “Said there’s a lot I’m allowed to do now. Including everything I want to do to you.”

He trailed kisses down to your neck and you moaned as his lips pressed into the sensitive skin there.

“I’ll beg if I have to,” he whispered. “But I need you, baby. Need to have you close, need to be inside of you.”

“Fuck,” you panted, eyes closed, fighting to focus. “Are…” his mouth found a particularly sensitive spot, kissing and sucking you gently and sending goosebumps spreading over your skin. “Jesus… are you… are you sure? I don’t want you gettin’ hurt…”

“I’m sure,” he said softly, finally pulling his lips from your skin to look in your eyes again, your body cradled against his. “Bein’ apart from you has damn near killed me. Need to feel you.”

“Need you, too,” you breathed, caving to your baser instincts. “Please, Joel.”

He kissed you again and you could taste the desperation on his tongue, heat pooling between your hips. He guided you toward the stairs as he shrugged out of his coat and pushed yours off your shoulders and down your arms. He left both in a heap on the floor, keeping his mouth against your own until the two of you were at the base of the stairs. You only separated long enough to go up them, Joel pulling you back against him on the second story landing.

You let him guide you, tried to focus on being gentle with him instead of pulling him to you and pressing him against you the way you wanted.

But you could only resist so long. You tugged at his shirt, pulling at the buttons until you could shove it down his arms and toss it to the floor, too. He did the same with yours, discarding it in the hall before pulling you into his bedroom, nudging the door closed with his foot. It wasn’t long before you were both naked next to his bed, bodies pressed close and tight, his cock thick and hard and weeping against your stomach.

You took control then, turning him in your arms so that he was against the bed. He lowered himself back onto it slowly, his grip on you gentle but secure so you were on his lap, straddling him as you kissed him.

“Really fucking missed you,” he whispered, kissing down your jaw to your neck to your chest. He rocked his hips up against you, his thick shaft nestled against your clit, the motion making you moan. “Goddamn, missed you so much.”

His hands slipped over your skin to your breasts, cupping and cradling them before lavishing his hot, wet mouth over the soft swell of flesh there. He sucked a nipple into his mouth with a needy groan and you couldn’t help but roll your hips against him as he did, your tight, hot center clenching and gripping at nothing, desperate for something to pull deep inside. Joel’s tongue teased the firm nub between his lips, licking and sucking you, making you moan and rock yourself against him on his lap before moving to the other breast, giving you the same treatment there.

“Joel,” you whimpered, fingers tangling in his curls. He pulled his mouth from your chest to look in your eyes, his gaze soft and hot like starlight.

“Think you can come like this for me?” He asked softly. “Want you to come for me, want you to be so wet and soft inside for me, think you can do that?”

You just nodded and his hands slid around to your back as he buried his face in your throat before going back to your breasts as he rutted his thick, dripping length up against your clit, the silken firmness of him pressing close and tight against your wet heat. You ground your hips down against him, desperate for more, to be as close as you could be to him, his body determinedly angled to keep you from working him into you. There was a tightening ache in you, the burn of need for something that was just out of reach making your head spin and pleasure spool.

“Just gotta come for me,” his voice was hot and needy. “Just come for me, all you gotta do. Just come, just come, please baby, just come, want to feel you come like this, you can give me that, know you can…”

His desperate words were what you needed, the tension in you rising until you felt like you were going to break with wanting before your orgasm hit you hard, a wave of pleasure rolling over you. It was sharp, you hadn’t come in weeks, and you could feel all of it. How your clit throbbed against his cock, how your entranced pulsed and grasped at the root of him, how it seemed like your entire being was trying to pull him into yourself.

“Oh fuck,” he held you tight to him, his cock pressed tight against you, so firm that you could feel him against your pubic bone. “Fuck, just like that. Gonna feel so good inside you baby, gonna be so goddamn good, just get all that come all over me, feel so good drippin’ all over me.”

You dropped your head to his shoulder, body going limp for a moment as your orgasm finished. Joel cradled you to him before going to adjust you on the bed but you stopped him, sitting up again and pressing back on his shoulders.

“Baby,” he groaned but you took his face in your hands and tilted his head so you could kiss him, really kiss him, the kind of kiss that was more hungry and consuming and claiming than anything else.

“Let me,” you whispered when you pulled your lips from his just enough to speak. He let you adjust him then, until he was flat on his back in the middle of the bed, your folded legs bracketing his thighs. You stroked his cock - wet with your come and leaking his own arousal - before rising onto your knees to notch his thick head at your entrance. Joel’s hands went to your thighs, his thumb tracing the scar there, the one from the knife you’d taken to the leg when trying to save him. His eyes were trained on it, his fingertips digging into your flesh more sharply there than your other leg. His eyes traced up your body to the scar at your stomach, just as harsh and red and raw as the one at your leg.

“Not tonight,” you said quietly. His eyes found yours. “It’s not about that tonight.”

He didn’t say anything. Instead, his callused hands slid up your thighs to your hips and you eased down onto his hard length. You moaned as you took him into yourself, his thick cock sinking into your soft heat. He felt so good inside of you, your body remembering just how to make him a part of you. It had been weeks but it didn’t matter, he was built into you now, he fit into you the way no one else ever could, filling and stretching you totally. His breaths stuttered as more and more of him entered you, his fingertips clutching onto the soft flesh of your hips and ass harder and harder with every inch of him that worked its way into you. Just as the ridge of his head ghosted against the back wall of your channel, your hips met his and you let yourself adjust for a moment, savoring the feel of him inside you that way.

Joel was panting for breath below you, his eyes tracing over your body again and again as your channel gripped him.

“You’re so fucking perfect,” he looked in your eyes as he said it. “Most beautiful goddamn thing I’ve ever seen.”

You just moaned a little, your hands coming to rest on the broad expanse of his chest, fingers splaying wide over his skin. But you didn’t move otherwise. He felt too good like this, so deep inside you. You almost didn’t want to move, didn’t care if you didn’t make yourself come with him in you. He was deep inside and he was secure there. You could feel how whole and alive he was, the way his cock throbbed, the pulse of him, the comforting heat. Like this, he was yours. Unquestionably, undoubtedly yours and no one could take him away from you.

“Fuck, sweetheart,” his fingers tightened on you. “I… fuck… I need you to move, baby… I can’t keep goin’ like this, I need… I need you to move, need to feel you, please baby, please.”

You didn’t respond. You just started to rise on his cock, moving your hips slow and shaky over him, making him groan. When just his head was left barely inside your entrance, you thrust back down, his cock splitting you open again, his head falling back, mouth open in a desperate gasp.

You rode him like that for a while, you weren’t sure how long. The slow and aching lift, the devastating reclaiming as you took him again and again almost meditative. You watched each other, lost in the feeling of your bodies together, working in tandem to become something more than just yourselves.

Eventually, Joel tugged you closer, tilting you down until he could reach your face, his large palm curving over your jaw, his thumb pressing into your cheek.

“C’mere,” he whispered in the dim light of the moon on the snow outside his window. “Want to feel more of you.”

You folded yourself into him, your bodies aligned, his cock still buried deep but your chest now against his, your lips overing over his own, noses against each other. Even in the night, you could see the different shades of brown in his iris like this, all of them soft and full of love for you.

His hand slid to the small of your back, tilting your hips just so and holding you there as he started thrusting up into you and making you whimper.

“Let me,” he said softly.

You just nodded, letting him gently work himself into you again and again. The strokes were aching and smooth, almost rocking as he moved inside of you. The deep, full press of his thick cock into all the soft parts of you that existed because of him, the brief moment of feeling so full and whole before the tender rhythm he set within you pulled him back again.

“Joel,” you whimpered, so desperate. You weren’t sure you could even say anything else, every other word you’d ever learned reduced down to the only one that mattered in that moment.

“Together,” he said quietly, never breaking his rhythm. “OK baby? Together.”

You just nodded quickly. Your body was getting tighter and tighter and you kept your eyes on his, breathing the same air, feeling the press of his warm, soft skin into yours as your orgasm built alongside his.

“You’re close,” he said. It wasn’t a question and you didn’t need to answer. He could feel you and you could feel him, too. “I’m gonna come, want you to come with me. Going to fill you up so deep, baby, going to feel me so deep and I need to feel you, too.”

His hand that was on your back pressed into you firmer, taking root at the base of your spine and pushing your hips lower so his cock was deeper longer, his hips pressed against your clit with more heat and tension and, for a moment, it felt as though your entire body was on fire with need before the band of pleasure that had been winding tight inside you snapped. Your orgasm hit you like a wave, rushing out from your core and flooding through the rest of your being just as Joel pressed your hips down and flush with his, holding himself deep as he came with a strangled moan. Your channel fluttered around him, rippling and pulling him into you as he pulsed deep inside. You could feel him so clearly against and inside you, every inch of his skin, every throb of his cock, every gasping breath. You kissed him then, bodies connected in every way, until your orgasms eased and you went limp on top of him. Your head nuzzled against the side of his neck and you breathed in the scent of his skin as you came back down to earth, his arms keeping you flush against him as his cock softened inside of you, the combination of his come and yours already dripping out of you.

“Never goin’ that long without you again,” he said softly, his fingers tracing slow and easy abstract patterns over your skin. You hummed in agreement. “I’m gettin’ to be too old to be so deprived.”

You laughed a little.

“Should start being more careful then,” you said, reaching out to card your fingers through his hair.

“Well now that I have the proper motivation…”

You laughed again and closed your eyes. He held you like that for a while, until goosebumps from the winter air started prickling over your skin. He took you more firmly then, slipping his soft cock from the safe, soft warmth of you and slipping you down beside him on the bed. He pulled a blanket over the two of you and you sighed contentedly. He tugged you closer and you happily obliged, your legs tanging with his as he brushed your hair back before holding your face gently in his large hand. You just smiled a little, eyes on his. He smiled back, just enough that his cheek dimpled.

“You’re still feeling OK?” You asked quietly after a few minutes.

He laughed lightly.

“Whole lot better than OK,” he replied. “I’m amazing. Always amazing when I’m with you.”

You smiled a little wider.

“You know,” he said slowly. “I had a lot of time to think when I thought I was about to die.”

Your smile shifted to a frown but his didn’t, not really. His gaze was just soft, gentle. Like he was trying to leave himself as open as he could to take as much of you in as possible.

“I remember more of that than anything that actually happened in that room. Didn’t have much in the way of regrets,” he continued. “Had you to thank for most of that. Ellie and I had made things right, I was thankful for that. I was thankful you’d come back to me, even if it was just for a night. Thankful I got to tell you I loved you one last time…”

“Joel,” you whispered. His thumb stroked your cheek.

“I saw Sarah,” he said quietly. Your eyes went wide but you stayed silent. “When I was unconscious, I saw her. She was someplace good, somewhere that was bright and warm like her. And there was part of me that wanted to stay with her, take care of her and make sure she was OK. But… most of me wanted to come back here and be with you and the girls. And Sarah… she told me that it wasn’t my time yet. Told me I still had things to do here, that I needed to take care of you and Ellie and Savvy and I just… I knew she was right. I felt it, more than I’d felt so many other things, I felt that. I belong here, next to you. I don’t want to have any regrets when it comes to you but right now… well, I got one big one.”

“What?” You asked quietly, your heart beating faster.

“That I almost died before having the chance to live as your husband,” he said. Your breath caught. “But you saved me, gave me a chance to do it right. And I don’t think I deserve to ask you for a damn thing but I’m hopin’ you’ll let me, anyway. Will you give me that chance? Will you be my wife, will you marry me?”

Your heart was beating so fast that you could hear your blood in your ears. You reached out, hand trembling, and cupped his cheek.

“Of course I will,” you said softly, voice thick and wet. Joel smiled, tears glistening in his eyes, and he kissed you, gentle and deep and lovely, a kiss empty of expectation and full of promise.

When you separated, you just looked at him for a moment, taking him in, the man who would be your husband. The whole concept made you laugh, the sound bubbling up in you.

He just smiled.

“What, baby?”

“I just…” you paused, still laughing a little. “It’s the end of the world, how do you even get married now? Not like there’s a courthouse…”

“Well,” he said, rolling away from you for a moment and reaching into the drawer of his nightstand. You propped yourself up on your elbow and frowned, watching as he rolled back with a small wooden box in his hand. “Figure since the paperwork part don’t exist anymore, we can do it whatever way you want to but…” he opened the box. Inside was two rings, both dark metal, one band slender, the other thick. “Thought I’d make sure this part was covered.”

“Oh Joel,” you sat up all the way, letting the blanket pool around your hips. You took the smaller ring from the box and held it up, looking at it up close. “Where did you find these?”

“Made ‘em,” he said, sitting up, too. “They’re from one of Ares’ old horseshoes. Figured it was only appropriate…”

“They’re perfect,” you breathed, turning it over in your fingers for a moment before looking at him. “Could we… I mean, I know it’s fast but… would you be OK if we just did it now?”

“Did what?”

“Got married,” you said, watching him. “I understand if you want to wait or want the girls there but…”

“How do you want to do it?” He cut you off.

You smiled a little.

“How about we just make promises to each other.”

He smiled back.

“I like it,” he took his ring out and set the box aside. He held it out toward you and you took it before putting your ring in his palm. The two of you faced each other, blankets in your laps, knees brushing under the covers.

He took a deep breath.

“I promise I’ll love you with every part of me,” he said. “And I promise I’ll keep lovin’ you until there’s none of me left.”

“I promise to love you every second of the rest of my life,” you replied. “And every second of whatever comes after, too.”

“I promise to protect you,” he said. “Promise to never let anything hurt you.”

“I promise to take care of you,” you said. “And look out for you and protect you because where you go, I go.”

“I promise to love your girl like she’s my own,” he continued. “And I promise to take care of her and do everything I can to make sure she’s safe and happy.”

“I promise to love Ellie like you do,” you said. “I promise to help guide her and protect her and give her the life she deserves to have.”

You looked at each other for a moment, tears in your eyes, before Joel gently took your left hand in his.

“Think they used to say ‘with this ring, I thee wed,’ or something like that,” he said, thumb tracing your knuckles.

“That sounds right,” you smiled a little.

“Alright then,” he said, lining the ring up with your finger. “With this ring, I thee wed.”

He slipped it into place. It fit perfectly, settling at the base of your finger with a soothing sense of finality. Joel lifted your hand to his mouth and kissed you there, his lips lingering on your skin for a moment before releasing you. You held his ring tight in your palm for a second, warming the metal, before taking Joel’s left hand. You lined the ring up with his finger and took a deep breath before looking him in the eye.

“With this ring, I thee wed.”

You slipped it into place, lacing your fingers with his once it settled where it belonged. You smiled, looking down and seeing his ring on your finger before looking back at him again.

“Think I get to kiss the bride now,” he said.

You laughed.

“I think so, too.”

He pulled you against him gently and kissed you all soft and deep, his lips holding every promise he’d made to you and, for the first time since the end of the world, you knew what it was to feel secure.

Next Chapter

A/N: ❤️

And that's all I have to say about that.

And that there's a lot more story to come. We're not quite to the end yet, I promise.

Thank you for being here and for reading. Love you!

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#fanfic #joel miller x female reader #yearling #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x oc #smut fic

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punkshort · 9 months

Text

Chapter warnings: smut (18+ MDNI), language, lots of smut, fluff, did I mention smut?

Epilogue

September 2005

"Are we almost there?" you asked Joel, who looked back over his shoulder at you from atop his horse.

"Almost," he assured you, turning back to the road in front of him.

He had wanted to keep it a surprise, but you saw the signs on the highway and figured it out a few hours into the trip. He was taking you to Yellowstone for "a few days", and it had taken you almost a full day on the back of a horse to finally get there. Your back and legs were sore, but you didn't complain. You were excited at the idea of getting away with Joel, just the two of you, the way it used to be.

You wondered where he was planning on taking you, having ridden by several campgrounds at this point as you made your way down the twisty road that led you through the entire park. You began to see signs for Old Faithful and your face lit up.

"C'mon, this way," he called over his shoulder as he steered his horse onto a road that led to a massive parking lot peppered with buildings. He led you past a visitors' center, a restaurant, and a general store until he stopped in front of a huge hotel.

"Whoa," you said, sliding down from your horse as you gawked up at the huge building, which was made to look like a giant log cabin.

"Me and Tommy came up a week ago and checked out the area, should be safe," he told you as he tied your horses to a railing.

"The whole building?" you asked incredulously. There was no way they could have gone through each room.

"Well, no, but we cleared the first floor and barricaded the stairs after we checked the hallways," he admitted. "Still should be on alert, though."

He led you up the steps and cracked the front door open, peeking inside for a minute before opening it all the way and letting you in. He held his rifle in his hands as he checked out the dining hall and kitchen before returning to you in the lobby. You had plopped down on a couch to rest, your head twisting around as you took in the artwork and informational signage on the walls.

"Tired?" he guessed, arching an eyebrow at you.

"A little," you admitted guiltily. "Guess I got too used to a life of luxury."

He laughed and held his arm out to help pull you up from the couch.

"C'mon, I already picked out a room for us," he said, leading you down the hall with his arm slung around your shoulder.

"I feel bad you did all this work and it's your birthday," you told him.

"You don't know if it's my birthday," he reminded you, and you shook your head.

"According to Maria's calendar, it's tomorrow," you said as you gave him a gentle poke in the ribs. No one was really sure what the actual date was. It had struck a big debate in a town hall meeting, various people swearing up and down they had kept track since the outbreak, but no one could agree on the same date. Maria compromised and picked a date in the middle, and it had been that way ever since.

"A few days all alone with you is well worth it," he said. Once you reached a door marked 19 all the way at the end of the hall, he dropped his arm from your shoulders and gripped his rifle.

"Lemme double check it's clear," he told you, pushing the unlocked door open and advancing into the room, doing a quick sweep before coming back out to the hall, ushering you inside.

"This is nice," you said, shrugging off your backpack and kicking off your boots. It was a standard hotel room: one king sized bed, a dresser, end tables, and a bathroom. But it looked like he had taken the time to clean it. You noticed there wasn't much dust on the surfaces in the room, and the bed looked freshly made.

"It's not much," he said as he walked to the covered window. "But this is why I picked it."

He flicked the curtains open so you could see outside. It was getting dark, but you could see a massive, open, rocky terrain directly outside your window. You squinted, trying to figure out what you were looking at when suddenly a huge gush of water shot straight up into the sky.

"Holy shit!" you yelled, quickly walking over to press your face against the window. Joel laughed. His timing couldn't have been more perfect.

You watched the geyser erupt for a few short minutes before it slowed and disappeared, and the quiet of evening enveloped the area once again.

"That was so cool," you said, looking up at him leaning against the window frame.

"We can get a better look tomorrow," he promised you. He pushed off the window to return to his pack, taking out a lantern and putting it on top of the dresser so you could see as the sun began to set.

"Is this where you and Tommy stayed when you came here?"

"No," he chuckled. "We were practically still kids. Thought we were tough roughin' it in the woods. First night we thought we heard a bear, next mornin' we booked the tiniest cabin you've ever seen, spent the rest of the week tryin' not to kill each other."

You laughed at the image he painted for you then flopped on the bed with a groan.

"Comfortable?" he asked you, standing up from emptying his backpack and turning around.

"Mhmm," you hummed, turning your head to look at him across the room. "Come here."

He strode over to you with a smirk and leaned down, his fists pushing into the mattress to hold him up on either side of you. He bent down to press his lips softly against yours, your eyes fluttering shut at the tenderness behind his kiss. You ran your hand up his exposed forearm, lightly tracing his veins under your fingertip while your other hand wrapped around the back of his neck, your fingers carding through his curls as you pulled him down further to you.

"Y'know, it's the anniversary of our first kiss," he mumbled against your mouth before pulling back and standing up.

"Oh, that's right," you said with a grin, then sat up on the bed as you watched him tug the curtains closed. You dragged your eyes up and down his body, thinking back to that night outside the bar and how much simpler life was back then.

"What're you thinkin' about?" he asked you, the corner of his mouth tugging up when he turned around and caught you staring.

"I was just wondering what would have happened that night if I went home with you," you told him. You giggled when his gaze darkened, his mind clearly taking what you said very literally.

"I mean, with us," you clarified. "And the outbreak. What our lives would have been like, if we would have even found each other that day..." your voice trailed off, leaving out the darker thought you had. What if Colleen had bit you?

Joel could tell you were overthinking when he saw your unfocused eyes trail around the room and your teeth sink into your lower lip.

"I always woulda found you, no matter what," he assured you. When that didn't seem to snap you out of it, he continued. "Besides, if you had come home with me that night, there was no way we were leavin' my bed the next day. I can promise you that."

That finally made a grin pull across your face and your eyes light up.

"Oh, yeah?" you pressed him, wiggling your eyebrows. You crawled across the bed, laying flat on your stomach and beckoned him to join you. He shook his head but walked back over to the bed anyway.

"Thought you were tired?" he murmured, his fingers gently trailing from the back of your neck down your spine.

"Not that tired," you said, turning your head to the side so you could look up at him standing above you. "Tell me what would have happened that night."

He felt his cock move in his jeans, and he bit the inside of his cheek to keep himself from groaning. It always amazed him how you could bring him to his knees with just a few words.

He swung his leg over yours so he was kneeling on either side of you, his hips resting on the back of your legs. He ran his hands up your sides before slowly dragging them back down to your hips, giving them a squeeze.

"Assumin' I didn't fuck you in the elevator first," he said lowly, his fingers dipping underneath the hem of your shirt. "I think I woulda laid you on top of my kitchen counter, pushed that little black dress up," he said as he lifted your shirt up to your shoulders, his hands massaging your sore back. "Then I woulda fucked you with my tongue til you were screamin' my name."

"Hmm," you moaned, wiggling your ass enticingly. "You do seem to have a thing for kitchen counters."

He grinned as he gently yanked your shirt over your head, leaving your top half bare and pressed into the bed.

"What else?" you asked breathlessly, your eyes sliding shut as he continued to rub his rough hands along your sore muscles.

"You remember those red shoes you were wearin'?"

You nodded and let out a soft whimper when his fingers found a particularly tough knot in your back.

"When I saw those, I thought about fuckin' you with 'em slung over my shoulders," he said, his erection straining against his jeans now.

"I should've packed them before we left my apartment," you muttered with a half smile. "I'm sure they would have been useful in the middle of the woods."

"Oh, you wanna talk about what went through my mind in your apartment?" he asked, reaching underneath you to unzip your jeans. He could feel the anticipation bubbling inside him becoming unmanageable, desperate to bury himself inside you.

"What about it?" you whispered, lifting your hips so he could pull your jeans off, leaving you in just your underwear. He hissed through his teeth when he saw the lacy pair you chose to wear for him, leaving very little coverage. His huge hands stretched out over each one of your cheeks as far as he could before curling his fingers and giving your ass an aggressive jiggle.

"Shoulda at least packed those little red panties stashed away in your drawer," he growled, his hands massaging your ass before traveling down the backs of your thighs, his movements becoming erratic. He felt your body still under him, and he froze, wondering if he crossed a line.

"What the hell? You went through my underwear drawer?" you asked sharply without turning your head to look at him. He cleared his throat before answering.

"Well, I-I didn't mean to, I was lookin' on top of your dresser and the drawer was open..." Joel stammered, feeling embarrassed until he felt your body shaking under his hands, your palm covering your mouth to stifle your laughter. He exhaled harshly when he realized you were just messing with him, his mood quickly changing back to playful.

"Oh, you're gonna get it now," he said darkly, making you yelp when he grabbed the sides of your underwear and roughly pulled them down your legs.

You tried to turn over, but his hand splayed across your lower back, effectively stopping you with a tsk.

"Nah, I think you're good right where you are, sweetheart," he said as he hurriedly unbuckled his belt. You heard the telltale sound of a zipper, and you thought you were going to jump out of your skin. Not being able to see him but to hear and feel everything was driving you wild.

He only pushed his jeans down far enough to free his cock, stroking it in one hand while his other hand curled around your hipbone, giving you a firm but gentle tug. You immediately obeyed, lifting your hips off the mattress but keeping your arms and head flat against the comforter. Your breaths were shallow as you anxiously waited for him to touch you.

Joel watched your arms reach straight out, your fingers gripping the duvet as your braced yourself for him. He looked down to admire your ass propped up in the air. He kept a firm hold on your hip as he slid his cock between your folds, collecting your arousal all along the length of him. You let out a low moan when his tip pushed up against your clit, and he couldn't help the smirk that danced across his face.

"You like messin' with me, hm?" he asked, dragging his cock through your folds again before his tip found your entrance, and he paused.

"Answer me," he demanded, his brows furrowed as he stared at the back of your head. You felt a shiver run down your spine at his tone. It was one of the things you loved most about him: his duality. The way he could be so gentle and soft, but also rough and harsh.

"Yes," you said breathily, and you felt his cock twitch against your cunt. Before you had a chance to think, his hand came down on your ass with a loud smack, followed immediately by him sinking into you with one swift motion.

"Fuck!" you cried out, waiting as the sting from his hand and cock slowly subsided into pleasure. Your fingers gripped the duvet so tight, they felt numb. You panted against your arm, waiting for him to move.

Both his hands gripped your hips lightly as he tried to ground himself, the sensation of your walls squeezing him making him dizzy. He watched, slack jawed, as the red handprint he left on your cheek slowly faded. Once it was gone, he swallowed and steadied himself.

He pulled back almost completely and paused before he pushed back into you as deep as he could, eliciting a moan from your throat. The angle caused him to get so deep that his tip was pressing against your cervix, making your eyes roll to the back of your head with each deep, powerful thrust.

He began to roll his hips steadily, his grip on you tightening as you whimpered under him. He could tell he was hitting that sweet spot by the soft noises you made and the way you clenched around him, causing him to quickly approach his high.

"Joel," you whined under him, desperate to hear his voice, still unable to see him.

"Would you have let me fuck you like this?" he gasped, his head tilting back and his eyes sliding shut as he continued to fuck into you. "That night at the bar? Would you - "

"Yes!" you cried out, your hips bucking against him now, desperate for release. "I wanted you so bad that night, baby, please..."

A switch flipped inside him when he heard that name - baby. He groaned, his eyes flashing open, his jaw clenched as his fingers left deep bruises in your hips.

"Fuck, y'know what that does to me," he muttered, slamming his hips into you over and over until he felt your cunt flutter around him, and you choked out a gasp, letting your orgasm wash over you as he continued to jerk inside you relentlessly.

He felt your body sag, but you fought to hold your hips up on shaky legs as he chased his release.

"That's my girl. Such a good girl, always make me feel so good," he murmured more to himself than anything. A few more thrusts and he pulled himself out of you quickly, spilling himself all over your back as you panted for air underneath him.

You both collapsed onto the bed: you on your stomach, him on his back, as you each attempted to catch your breath.

"Jesus, fuck," he rasped, staring at the ceiling. You turned your head and gave him a quiet giggle.

"I should mess with you more often," you teased, pulling the hair back from your face.

"I'm gettin' old, you know," he said, turning his head to the side. "You might kill me."

You hummed as your fingers danced up his still clothed torso, your eyelids drooping. With a groan, he pushed himself off the bed to fish out a rag from his backpack, cleaning you both up before tossing it on the floor and shimmying out of his clothes. He collapsed into bed naked, pulling you against him and yanking the sheets over the top of you both.

He buried his nose in your hair, inhaling deeply before he drifted off to sleep.

You woke up the next morning to Joel's rough, calloused hands lazily drawing circles over your stomach. You were both still naked under the sheets, Joel's arms wrapped around you from behind as you slept on your right side, tucked against him. His warm breath fanned across the back of your neck, sending a shiver down your spine as you pressed yourself into him further. You were both barely awake, eyes closed as you enjoyed each other's gentle touch under the cool, white sheets.

Joel pushed his hips against your ass, craving your warmth while his hand slowly traveled to your ribs, stroking the old scars that served as a reminder of what you were willing to do for him. You sighed, eyes still closed as you pushed yourself back against his hardening length. His fingers continued to blindly trace your scars until he slid his hand down to your hip, pressing a small kiss against your shoulder. His beard tickled your overly sensitive skin, giving you goosebumps. Joel yanked the covers over you further, thinking your reaction meant you were cold. He returned his hand to your hip, his massive palm gripping it lightly while he encouraged you to roll your ass against him slowly, and you happily obliged.

His right hand spread across your stomach and pulled you close, while his left hand found its way from your hip to between your legs. He let out a soft moan when he felt your wetness collecting there, all for him. He kept his eyes shut and rested his face against the back of your neck, lazily teasing your clit with the pad of his middle finger. You sighed, your hands reaching up to grip the pillow you had been sleeping on as you continued to slowly rock your hips against his cock.

You could feel your slick spreading over your inner thighs, your legs still pressed together while Joel continued to work you slowly, like he had all the time in the world. You felt the telltale stickiness of his precum leaving a trail on your lower back while you continued to rub up against him.

You lifted your left leg in the air, your ankle resting on the side of his knee. Reaching down, your fingers wrapped around his cock, notching his thick head against your aching cunt and sighed with relief as he pushed himself into you. His hand left your clit to steady your hip against him, his other hand still pressed firmly on your stomach.

You both kept your eyes closed, savoring the slow, languid feeling of his cock sliding in and out of you, filling you up. You could feel every inch of him from this angle, fitting so perfectly inside you, rubbing his tip slowly and steadily against that one spot only he managed to find.

His left hand slid down your inner thigh, his hips still rocking gently against your ass, until his palm reached your knee. He pulled it up towards the ceiling, your foot falling onto the bed behind his legs, opening up your hips to deepen the angle.

You gasped softly and your grip tightened on the pillow. His chest was pressed up against your back, and you could hear the stickiness on your skin from your combined sweat with each of his slow thrusts and roll of your hips.

His hand remained on your knee, spreading you open for him as he steadily fucked into you from behind. You could tell by his exhale on your neck that his breath was coming quicker now. You felt the familiar coil tightening in your lower stomach, and you tipped your head back, mouth hanging open, eyes still closed.

Your movement must have finally made him open his eyes to look at you because he craned his neck over to claim your open mouth with his, his tongue lazily swirling around yours.

There was no rush. No frantic, hurried movements. Just the two of you enjoying a peaceful, serene morning.

You whimpered softly against his mouth. He could feel your muscles tensing under his hands, a sign warning him you were close. He kept his hand on your knee but reached his right hand down to your clit, two fingers working you back and forth until the coil finally snapped.

You moaned, the loudest noise either of you had made so far that morning, as your hips stuttered against him. He felt your release coating his already soaked cock as he forced his eyes open to watch you. He kept rolling his hips into you steadily while you came down from your high, gasping for breath and covered in sweat.

He was so transfixed on your face, so obsessed with the way he could unravel you, that he didn't even realize his own climax had snuck up on him. He groaned into your neck as he felt his thick ropes of cum shooting inside you.

Reality came crashing down quickly, his eyes widening as he pulled his hips back aggressively, watching the rest of his spend coat your back and the sheets.

"Oh, fuck," he gasped, scrambling to sit up on the bed. You gave him a confused look over your shoulder, still lost in the afterglow of your orgasm. He grabbed your ankles and twisted you around so you were flat on your back, pushing your legs apart and peering between them to confirm his fear.

"Fuck!" he said, more panicked now. You sat up when you realized what happened, looking down at the trail of cum that was leaking out of you and onto the bed.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to - fuck!" he said for the third time, his jaw clenching while his hand angrily raked through his hair.

"Wait, just calm down, let me think for a second," you told him, your hand over your chest. Your eyes scanned the room as you mentally did the math, trying to remember the last time you had your period.

"What's there to think about? Christ, I'm such a fuckin' asshole," he said as he stood from the bed and paced around the room, rubbing the heels of his palms into his eyes.

"I think it's fine," you said timidly, still counting the days in your head. "Yeah, it's fine. We're fine," you said more confidently now.

"How?!" he exclaimed, clearly still in a panic. You kneeled on the bed now, holding out your hands to try and quiet him down.

"Joel, there's only a handful days a month where this would have been a problem, and fortunately for us, this is not one of those days," you explained calmly. He looked confused, so you continued.

"I'm supposed to get my period in like, 4 or 5 days. I'm not ovulating, it's fine," you emphasized, and you watched as his eyes softened, absorbing your words.

"Oh, shit," he muttered, tipping his head back. His body sagged with relief as he flopped back on the bed, his hand on his heaving chest.

"Relax, it's okay," you cooed, running your fingers gently through his hair. He sighed and looked up at you.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart," he repeated, and you shook your head.

"Don't be. It was such a nice way to wake up, let's not ruin it," you said softly, leaning down to press a kiss against his lips.

"Mmm, it was, wasn't it?" he said, smiling against your mouth.

"Except now, you made a mess, and I need to clean myself up," you teased, sliding off the bed to head into the bathroom.

"Wait," he called out, and you turned around. "Before you do... c'mere."

You walked slowly back over to his side of the bed, his gaze raking up and down your naked form.

"What?" you whispered, his hand reaching up to grasp yours.

"Let me see," he told you, his gaze flicking down to your cunt and then back up to your eyes. Your breath hitched in your throat at his request.

"You already saw," you teased, and he grunted, dropping your hand and pushing himself up so he was sitting on the edge of the bed.

"I wanna see again," he said sternly, his gaze dark. His hands reached out to grip the backs of your thighs, pulling you toward him so you stood between his knees.

You placed your hands on his shoulders and took a step to the side, parting your legs. He watched with his lips parted as a trail of his cum dripped slowly down your thigh.

"Fuck," he whispered to himself, his hand coming down from your leg to palm his half hard cock.

"Oh, now you like it?" you chided him, but he just nodded and swallowed, still staring.

"Would it be bad if I wanna do it again?" he whispered, looking up at you.

"I'm not sure we should celebrate it, Joel," you muttered, your nails grazing his shoulder. You shifted your weight, trying to hide the familiar ache growing between your legs.

"You want it, too," he said, noticing how you tried to keep yourself from pressing your thighs together.

You bit your lower lip as you stared into his eyes, pupils blown wide with lust. Your gaze flickered down to his cock, fully hard now and waiting for you. His hands massaged the backs of your thighs, his eyes never leaving yours as he waited for your response.

You re-counted the days in your head hurriedly before you nodded.

"Just this once," you whispered, knowing it was a lie the moment the words left your lips. He growled, one hand sliding up your back while the other firmly held your thigh so he could twist you around, tossing you on your back behind him.

He crawled on top of you feverishly, a wild look in his eye as his mouth lunged down to cover yours. You could hardly keep up with his tongue before he dragged his mouth down your jaw, sucking and licking the sensitive skin on your neck.

"Joel," you whined, your legs spreading under his weight. It felt like his body was vibrating with excitement, the urge to claim you in the rawest sense taking over. He reached down to line himself up, and with barely any warning, buried his cock inside you all the way to the hilt, making you cry out underneath him. He groaned into your shoulder, his arms wrapped around you tightly, his pace merciless. Your fingernails left marks on his back as you held on for dear life, a stark contrast to the lazy way he fucked you earlier that morning.

He was lost in his own head, pounding into you like an animal, the thought of filling you with his cum driving him crazy. You whimpered, trying to adjust your hips to ease the sting with no success. It occurred to him he was being too rough when he heard the noise you made, and he slowed his hips, lifting his head from your shoulder to look down at your face, which was trying to mask the pain.

"I'm sorry," he gasped, rolling his hips a little slower.

"It's okay," you squeaked, your eyes screwed shut. "Keep going."

"Don't wanna hurt you," he murmured, holding your hip down and rolling his cock inside you more deliberately, the way he knows you liked.

"Not hurting me," you told him, forcing your eyes open and blinking back tears.

"Liar," he said, planting a soft kiss against your lips. You moaned and tipped your head back while he continued to thrust into you slower, your nails easing up on his back.

"Think you can come for me, sweetheart?" he panted, watching your face closely for any more discomfort.

"I-I don't know," you admitted, your brows furrowing in concentration. He pulled his hips back so his hand could travel between your bodies, the pad of his thumb brushing against your clit.

"How's that?" he asked, causing you to squirm underneath him and gasp.

"Better," you groaned as his thumb built up your second orgasm of the morning. "Yeah, like that, fuck - talk to me, Joel," you begged.

"You like it when I talk dirty to you?" he asked, already knowing the answer.

"Yes," you hissed, arching your back as he continued rolling his hips into you.

"What'dya wanna hear?" he grunted. "Want me to tell you how tight your pretty pussy feels, even though I already stretched it out last night and this mornin'?"

You moaned and pinched your eyebrows together, his words washing over you, making you climb higher.

"Or you wanna hear somethin' sweeter?" he asked, his hips slowing a fraction. "Wanna know how much I think 'bout you all day? How I can't focus on anyone else when you're in the room, hm? How I've never loved anybody the way I love you?"

You felt the tears prick your eyes again, but this time it wasn't due to pain.

"Joel," you whispered, bringing a hand up from his shoulder to rake through his hair. His thumb picked up the pace and your eyes rolled to the back of your head.

"That's right, say my name," he groaned, loving the way he alone could make you come undone. "Wanna hear you scream it when you come for me, can you do that, sweetheart?"

You nodded obediently, eyes squeezed shut and jaw slack as you felt yourself about to let go. He felt your walls tighten around him, and he smirked, his thrusts picking up the pace again.

"Oh, fuck," he gasped, his hips stuttering. "C'mon, let me hear you."

"Joel!" you yelled out, just as you promised, your back arching off the bed and your hand yanking his hair violently as you felt the wave of your climax wash over you yet again.

"That's my girl," he said through gritted teeth, his hips snapping into you again, the hand that was previously on your clit found its spot back on your hip, keeping you in place.

"I'm gonna come, sweetheart," he panted, his vision getting spotty. "I'm gonna come in this tight pussy, make a fuckin' mess."

"Do it," you whispered, your body lax underneath him, eyes slid shut.

"Need you to say it," he pleaded, his voice pained. You opened your eyes and looked at him. His forehead was dripping with sweat, his eyes wild as he stared down at you, waiting for your permission again.

"Come inside me, Joel," you murmured. You felt the goosebumps pop up under his skin at hearing your words. He hung his head, giving you just a couple more thrusts before his body stilled with a deep groan.

"Fuck!" he growled, looking down as he throbbed inside you, watching as his slow thrusts eventually pushed his hot spend out, collecting at the base of his cock. His arms gave out, collapsing on top of you, catching his breath against your shoulder.

"Goddamn," he croaked, turning his face towards you after a minute. "I like bein' inside you after."

"Yeah," you whispered, your eyes closed, enjoying the feeling of having him everywhere.

"Happy birthday," you added with a smirk. He let out a huff that sounded like a tired laugh, and he gave your shoulder a quick kiss.

"Thank you," he muttered, dragging his lips over the curve of your shoulder, making you shudder.

"Did I hurt you?" he asked as his hand wrapped around your waist.

"No, I would have told you to stop if you hurt me," you said, opening your eyes to look at him. He searched your face for a moment before nodding and shutting his eyes.

You let him stay like that for a few minutes until the stickiness between your legs became too uncomfortable.

"Joel," you murmured, and he hummed in response. "I gotta clean up."

He let out a groan of protest before he shakily pushed himself up on his arms and slowly slid his cock out of you with a hiss, staring at the mess he left between your legs.

"Nuh uh, don't get any ideas, I need a break," you warned him, pushing on his shoulder so you could stand. He laughed, helping you up on unsteady legs.

"Couldn't do it if I tried, I ain't Superman," he joked as you wobbled towards the bathroom.

"Coulda fooled me," you called back over your shoulder before you shut the bathroom door behind you.

"I thought we were going to see the geyser again?" you questioned wearily as you watched Joel unhook a canoe from inside the cabin he had just broken into. He dragged it out onto the grass before turning back to find paddles inside.

"It goes off like every hour or somethin', we'll see it a bunch more, I promise," he said, handing you a paddle. You took it gingerly from his hand as he tossed his own into the canoe and began pushing it on the grass towards the water.

"You sure the horses will be ok?" you asked, not thrilled about the idea of floating down something called Firehole River.

"Yeah, they're good. I got them all set up in a shed. Plenty of food and water. You alright?" he asked, finally noticing the discomfort on your face.

"Yeah, I'm fine," you nodded. You wanted to do whatever he wanted to do. After all, it was his birthday.

"Don't look fine," he said, giving the canoe a final shove but keeping one foot inside so it didn't float away.

"I'm just not really good on water," you finally admitted. "I get sick, the waves make me nauseous."

"Oh, don't worry about it, sweetheart. You'll be alright. River doesn't have any waves, it's slow. But if you do start to get sick, we can go back."

You agreed, if only because he seemed so excited for whatever he had planned and you didn't want to ruin it. You took a tentative step into the canoe, your hand flying out to grab onto Joel when you felt it shift under you.

Once both feet were inside, you quickly sat down so your weight didn't rock the boat. Joel jumped in with ease after he gave the canoe a shove from shore, and he began to paddle north. It was a cooler day, but the sun warmed your skin to the point where you ended up shedding your coat after a few minutes.

"Hardly even need to paddle, current's takin' us fast," he said, setting down the paddle and leaning back, admiring the huge trees that lined the river. He turned his head to watch a small herd of deer drinking from the river as you floated by a clearing in the woods.

"This is actually very peaceful," you admitted, closing your eyes and leaning back against his chest.

"Feelin' sick?" he asked as he rubbed a hand up and down your arm.

"Nope, I'm good," you told him. "Where are we headed?"

"It's a surprise," he said with a grin.

"It's your birthday, you're supposed to be the one surprised."

"I seem to remember bein' surprised this mornin'," he teased, and you swatted at his arm.

"Fine," you grumbled, closing your eyes again.

All of the physical activity from yesterday and that morning must have caught up with you because the next thing you knew, Joel was whispering in your ear, waking you up.

You squinted up at him, the sun still powerful overhead.

"Must've wore you out," he joked as he tried to paddle the canoe to shore. Your body was still draped over his and clearly in his way, so you sat up to free him, stretching your arms with a yawn and looking at your surroundings.

"How long was I asleep?"

"Maybe half an hour," he said with a grunt when the canoe hit land. He stood up and hopped on the shore, leaning forward to haul you and the canoe halfway onto the gravel before reaching out his hand to help you up.

"What a rugged, sexy boyfriend I have," you giggled, and you swore you saw his cheeks flush when he smiled.

"C'mon, grab your backpack, we gotta walk a bit but it ain't far," he said, waiting for you to be ready.

"What's not far?" you tried again, adjusting your shoulder straps as you fell in step next to him.

"You'll see," he said with a smirk, and you rolled your eyes.

You walked for maybe 15 minutes on rocky, white terrain before you saw the steam in the distance. You squinted, trying to figure out what you were looking at. It wasn't until you passed by a sign that said "Grand Prismatic Spring" that you figured it out.

"Is this a hot spring?!" you exclaimed, and he nodded, the corners of his mouth turning up as your excitement bubbled over.

"Largest one in the country," he said as you got closer.

"Oh my god!" you cried out, unable to contain yourself when you saw it. It was huge. The steam was thick as it hovered over the water, but you could still see the size of it, and the colors. It had to be the most beautiful thing you had ever seen. The vivid oranges on the shore that faded to bright yellows, then greens to a deep blue took your breath away.

"Can we swim in it?" you asked him, and he shook his head.

"It's too hot, you'll burn," he told you regrettably when he saw your face fall. "But there is another spot a bit of a ways over there called Opal Pool. Me and Tommy swam it in when we were here."

"Sounds beautiful," you told him, leaning up to give him a quick kiss on the lips. "Lead the way."

It was only a ten minute walk from the hot spring to the small body of water. Joel warned you as you yanked off your shirt that it wasn't a hot spring, so the water was a bit cooler, but it should still be comfortable. You shimmied out of your pants, eager to soak your sore muscles in the crystal blue water.

You tested the water out briefly with your toes before going all the way in as quickly as you could, submerging yourself up to your collarbone. He was right, the water was a little chilly, but it still felt good. You turned around just in time to watch his fully naked form come in after you, a quick puff of air leaving his mouth once he realized the temperature before he made his way over to you and wrapped his arms around your ribs, pulling you close.

You hooked your legs around his waist and rested your arms around his shoulders. Leaning forward, you pressed gentle kisses against his neck and a contented sigh left his mouth.

"This might be the best birthday I've ever had," he murmured into your ear.

"I don't know," you said, leaning back. "That Beefaroni I found you last year was pretty good." He laughed before pressing a kiss against your lips.

"Yeah, that was a good one, too," he relented, bringing a wet hand out of the water to brush back the hair from your face. You leaned into his touch with a sigh.

"What would it have been like if we ended up living here, like you wanted?" you wondered out loud as you stared into his deep brown eyes.

"I'm sure there's pros and cons," he said, his eyes traveling down to your tits just barely concealed by the water. "This is definitely in the pro column." You laughed as you rested the side of your head against this shoulder.

"Woulda been harder to survive. Constantly havin' to hunt and trap. Woulda been lonely. Not that I feel lonely when it's just us," he corrected himself quickly, and you rubbed his arm, letting him know you understood. "Sometimes it's nice to have other people around, is all."

"And the pros?" you asked him, your breath raking over the skin of his throat.

"Pros are easy," he said with a smile, and his hold around you tightened. "Just you and me. And all this. No threats. No danger. Just... peace and quiet."

You hummed and brought your head back up to give him another kiss, your lips slotting perfectly against his.

"It's nice that we can have both," you whispered against his mouth.

"Just as long as you're happy," he murmured, pressing his forehead against yours.

"I'm happy," you assured him. "I'm beyond happy."

Tag List: @chiogarza, @sparklejumpropequeen-777, @shotgun-shelby @partyofone3413 @nana90azevedo @ninaminaromina

317 notes · View notes

wttcsms · 5 months

Note

WAIT DON'T CLOSE IT YET!!!!! the 'love story told in untraditional format' prompt and DABI??? mm.

would like to meet, touya todoroki ;

pairing touya 'dabi' todoroki x f!reader word count 1.9k synopsis the dregs of society run rampant on hinge, and everyone knows you're not going to meet The One on there. but you know the saying... love does come when you least expect it. alternatively: catching feelings through the hinge dms. content contains one reference to jumping off a building, some sexual jokes author's notes OK not necessarily a love story, but there are feelings in involved, i swear. this is supposed to be fun & silly!!!!

You nearly throw your phone across the room. Download Hinge, your friends encouraged you. It’ll be fun!

You frown at Shigaraki’s ever-so-eloquent opening line of I’d blow yo back out. Yeah, you can see why this app was designed to be deleted. The fucking dregs of society are crawling all over this thing. Just one nice, well-adjusted individual. That’s all you’re asking for!

Apparently, any decent guy is either taken or not on Hinge. You debate throwing in the towel and just meeting someone organically, like, out in public, exactly as the good lord intended, but right before you do, your phone vibrates.

New Notification!

Hinge | Dabi liked your image!

Hinge | Dabi sent you a chat!

It’s a Friday night, and you know for a fact that there is not a single sane man on this app, especially at this hour. Considering the fact that you’re sitting in bed right now, about to rewatch Pride & Prejudice for the sixth time this week, what else do you have to lose? Dignity? You open the app.

Apr 22 10: 24 PM

Dabi: You’re hot, what’s wrong with you

You: ??

Dabi: You’re too hot to be single and on here. What’s your deal

You: you’re on here too? 🤨

Dabi: Would you say I’m too hot to the point where it’s suspicious I’m on here

You: i’m not here to give you an ego boost

Dabi: Then what’s the point of being on here

You: so you just get on here for free compliments?

Dabi: Maybe I have premium. Maybe I pay for these compliments

You: yeah, you look like the type to pay for hinge premium ngl

Dabi: Bye I’m going to talk to girls that are easier to manipulate

You: please do 🙏

Apr 23 1:21 PM

Dabi: Did you miss me

Apr 23 3:15 PM

You: so much

Apr 23 4:47 PM

Dabi: How much

Apr 23 6:01 PM

You: i was going to jump off a bridge if u didn’t text me

Apr 23 8:01 PM

Dabi: Damn that’s crazy

Dabi: How I don’t care

Apr 23 10:15 PM

You: don’t you have anyone else to bother

Dabi: I want to bother you though

You: you probably scared off every girl you’ve ever come in contact with

Dabi: True

Dabi: Except for you because you’re stupid

You: you pay for hinge premium, there’s an idiot in this conversation but it’s def not me

Dabi: I was joking

Dabi: I don’t have money like that

You: i can tell

You: you probably take girls out for coffee as a first date, and then make them venmo u their half of the bill

Dabi: Nah

Dabi: I make her pay the full amount

You: i’m not surprised

Dabi: That was a joke too

Dabi: I never take girls out

You: thank God

You: you’d probably be every girl’s worst date story

Dabi: Want to test that theory out

You: no thanks, i don’t feel like being content material for some crime podcast

Dabi: Smart girl

Apr 24 12:13 PM

Dabi: Wyd

You: at the police station, filing a restraining order on you

Dabi: Damn

Dabi: You want to be the one to put me in cuffs

You: the officer here actually has pink cuffs, i know some guys find that emasculating but you seem like you wouldn’t mind

Dabi: I love pink actually

Dabi: I’m so down

You: i think you’re my dream guy

You: more like my sleep paralysis demon, but same difference

Dabi: Aw you think of me when you sleep

Dabi: You’re that obsessed already

You: stfu

Dabi: Don’t feel bad

Dabi: I’m a munch fr

Dabi: I need u

You: what you need is to be put on some medication

Dabi: Yeah you’re my medication

You: you need to be psychologically evaluated

You: r u a social experiment

Dabi: Stop flirting with me

You: you’re so childish

Dabi: Am I bothering you

Dabi: Do I elicit strong emotions

You: you don’t look like someone who knows the word elicit

Dabi: I’m in grad school

You: wow

You: this is the first time you’ve left me genuinely speechless

Apr 24 3:55 PM

Dabi: Yo when’s ur bday

Dabi: Do you have any siblings

You: are u gonna ask for my mother’s maiden name too

Dabi: Yeah actually

Dabi: Give me your ssn while you’re at it

You: ur a creep, ur lucky ur cute

Dabi: Wow, you can’t have deep convos with anyone any more without being accused of trying to get answers to their security questions

You: tell me something abt you first

Dabi: My dad sucks

You: yeah you look like you would have daddy issues

Dabi: Lmao

Dabi: I’m being fr though

You: yeah, a lot of dads do suck. what abt the rest of ur family?

Dabi: I haven’t seen them in years

You: oh

You: do they suck too?

Dabi: Nah

Dabi: I moved out as soon as I could

You: your dad was that bad?

Dabi: The worst

You: are you trying to get pity pussy rn???? don’t tug on my heartstrings if it’s all just a lie

Dabi: Damn wtf

Dabi: But also depends. Do u wanna give me some pity pussy rn

You: bye i thought we were actually having a serious moment

Dabi: I wasn’t lying. Swear

Dabi: Now tell me something too

You: im an attention seeker. that’s why im on here

Apr 25 1:56 PM

Dabi: Did u miss me not giving u attention

Apr 25 3:56 PM

You: sorry, i was having really crazy sex waiting for u to come back

Dabi: Fire

Dabi: You deserve it

Dabi: Me next?

You: only if you promise to tell me u love me before the post nut clarity hits

Dabi: I love manipulating women during sex

Dabi: Anything for u

You: you say that but someone else is in my dms telling me that i can be his housewife and raise our kids and never work a day in my life again so pls top that offer

Dabi: DAMN

Dabi: I bet he’s boring

You: he’s not boring, we’re actually getting married and gonna have a big family

Dabi: Well clearly the fact that ur talking about him to me shows that u aren’t interested in him

You: i’m telling u abt him so u have something to aspire to

Dabi: Damn you should date him then

You: that’s the first intelligent thing you’ve said

Apr 26 7:00 AM

Dabi: I hate you

Dabi: Wyd today

You: pls mind ur own business

Dabi: Smd

Dabi: Tell me or I block you

Apr 26 8:19 AM

Dabi: U suck

You: and swallow

Dabi: No you don’t

Dabi: You probably spit it out

Apr 27 9:34 AM

You: true but in my defense, you look like you would produce something that tastes like toxic waste

Dabi: Were u deadass ignoring me

You: don’t be so needy, dabi. it’s not a good look

Dabi: Sorry that was a moment weakness

Dabi: So what now

Dabi: Is this when u give me ur insta

You: i don’t have any social media

Dabi: Nah you’re a catfish

You: maybe

Apr 27 1:34 PM

Dabi: Wyd

You: you’re a true wyd warrior, do u realize that

You: i’m currently getting my back blown out by a dude who posted his headshot as one of his hinge pics. i am not even faking my moans.

Dabi: Stfu 😂

Dabi: Do u even know what sex is

Dabi: Name one position

You: easy, missionary

Dabi: Well you’re on your phone so obviously the sex you’re having isn’t that good

You: im just a good multitasker

Dabi: tell me if ur shit is grippy

You: hold on, let me ask him

Dabi: Whats his name

Dabi: Whats he saying

You: don’t worry abt his name

You: he told me im gripping him so tight, it’s like i’m trying to take his blood pressure rn

Dabi: LMAO

Dabi: That means ur not attracted to him

You: wow, a guy who knows that tight doesn’t equal aroused, i’m genuinely impressed w you

You: and for the record, i would never actually fuck a guy who posts a professional headshot as one of his pics on hinge

Dabi: Oh now you tell me

Dabi: Guess I have to cancel the appointment I just made to get a headshot done

Apr 28 6:20 AM

Dabi: Im leaving Okinawa to go back to work. I’m sad, cheer me up

You: just commit a crime so they won’t let you leave

You: also i think maybe u need a psych eval or smth bc why are u still talking to me 🤨

Dabi: Nah tbh you’re the most interesting person on here

Dabi: I’m gonna go to tokyo and commit a crime on u

You: yea, u not being in my guts rn should be a crime

Dabi: Chill my dick isn’t big enough for that 😂

You: i want you to seek professional help

Dabi: I want u to seek these nuts in ur mouth

You: when should i ghost you

Dabi: Whenever u want bae you can ghost me anytime

Apr 28 7:26 AM

Dabi: REPLY

You: u literally told me i could ghost u anytime WHAT IS UR DEAL

Dabi: Damn ok well when you do at least say goodbye

You: when i do, i’m reporting ur hinge account in the hopes that u get banned and have to resort to meeting women irl

You: i’m actually reporting ur account rn

Dabi: Good idea

Dabi: I’ll report u too

Dabi: Before you get banned from hinge, can I have your number

You: no

You: i don’t give my number out to random ass strangers online

You: and ‘dabi’ is a weird name to have saved in my contacts

Dabi: Touya

Dabi: That’s my real name

You: oh

You: who the hell uses a fake name on a dating app??? 😭

Dabi: Stranger danger is real

Dabi: If I take you out on a date will you give me your number

You: a REAL date???

Dabi: Yeah I’m actually a gentleman in case you couldn’t tell

You: i don’t know how i could’ve missed that fact.

Dabi: I’m being fr though

Dabi: Dinner reservations and everything

You: are you paying the entire bill 🤨

Dabi: Why wouldn’t I

You: hmmm

You: every sex joke i made was definitely just a joke though, pls don’t get any crazy ideas

Dabi: Obviously you were joking, I’m not an idiot

You: you’re not gonna try to hit on the first date?

Dabi: If it’ll make you more comfortable, I’ll tape a 10 ft pole to my chest so I can’t get anywhere near you

You: cute

Dabi: Dinner tomorrow?

You: yes, dinner tomorrow

Dabi: And if I do well, I get your number?

You: hmmm

You: i guess

Dabi: Fuck yeah

Dabi: I’m tired of texting you through hinge

You: you only get it IF you do well

Dabi: I’m gonna rock your shit

Dabi: Romantically

You: sure you will

Apr 30 12:01 AM

Are you sure you want to delete the Hinge app?

Yes | No

You selected Yes! Reason for deletion?

[ ] No new matches

[ ] App is difficult to work with

[ ] Found another app to use

[ X ] I met someone

#dabi x reader #touya todoroki x reader #bnha x reader #mha x reader #one shot #drabble #fluff #imagine

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hobies-princealbert · 10 months

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having fontaine as a boyfriend hcs | (this is a long one y'all)

▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎♤▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎♤▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎♤▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎♤▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎♤▪︎

♤ fontaine is a very stoic man. he prefers to be reserved, only speaking a few words at a time when necessary. keep to yourself, you keep yourself alive. that's his motto. that's just life in the glen period.

♤ so everyone in his immediate circle was kinda taken back when you were spotted in the passenger seat of his car, one too many times. no one really hung round taine like except junebug. so no one expected him to actually get a girlfriend. a ting of the side, yes. but a girlfriend....nah.

"yo taine, who's that gurl we see you hangin' 'round? i ain' go hold you she fine asf" one of his 'buddies' straight up ask his boss what everyone's been thinking for weeks.

"my girl" he answered without missing a beat.

"by girl you mean main bitch right? i see you boss. how many more girls you got?"

"just the one. that's all i need" since then everyone in the glen knew you as taine's girl.

♤ if you were wondering how you guys met, it was a simple infatuation turned relationship. he was the regular plug for your brother, and would come by every once in a while. you rarely spoke to each other, just stole glances at each other for a while.

♤ fontaine knew he was only there for business. but he couldn't help actually looking forward to when your brother called, cause that meant he would get to see you again. things slowly progressed to the point he started coming over even when your brother didn't call. now yall are dating.

♤ he is a surprisingly attentive and supportive partner. if you have anything bothering you, you can always lean on him. he's not good on advice, but taine's a great listener and knows how to cheer you up. whether it's a late night drive, or stuffing your face over at his house on the couch, he'll do everything he can to make his girl smile again. and god help anyone makes you upset.

♤ despite his rough exterior and line of work, taine's super gentle with you. he'll open the car door for you, offer you food even if you just ate, and drive you anywhere you need to go, especially at night. he knows the glen ain't safe, he can't risk it especially with his reputation.

♤ he also doesn't mind buying you stuff too. he's not kingpin rich, but he's not broke that's for sure. from a simple drink at the corner store to a pair of gold earrings from the pawn shop. he buys, no debate.

♤ to many, he's an outwardly emotionless man. rarely expresses an emotion besides annoyance and anger. even slick, who's known him since grade school ain't never seen him smile before. but you have. yup you saw fontaine's laugh himself to tears. though the reason wasn't idle, you vividly how he looked when he genuinely smiled.

"t-taine that's not funny, i almost DIED. shut upppp" he snorted as you smacked his arm. you dipped you head on his shoulder in embarrassment cause he was still laughing at you.

"wha' ma- you expect me not to laugh at that shi' you just pulled. calm down you aight" he took back the blunt that nearly choked you out cause you wanted to look bad infront of your boyfriend.

taine knew you weren't that much of a smoker and smoked a blunt every once in a blue moon, or when you really needed one. so it surprised him when you walked over and took the blunt that was resting between his lips and took a drag.

a fast, deep drag, that he knew damn sure your lungs were not prepared for. so when you bursted into a fit of coughs, he couldn't help but laugh his ass off.

don't worry after he cooled down, he rubbed your back and assure you at you were still that baddest bitch on the block. even if you couldn't smoke a blunt.

♤ supppperr touchy. doesn't matter time or place. he has to have his hand resting on you, he just wants to make sure that of he turns his head your still there, and that your real.

♤ he introduced you to junebug once and ever since then he could never shake the thought of making you a mom one day. i know he doesn't look it but he's very family oriented person. he hopes to have one day. but that's a story for another day.

♤ he loves you. he won't out right say it but just by the way he treats you and looks out for you like no other, trust me he simply adores you. that nigga would take a bullet for you cause to him you're absolutely perfect.

#fontaine x reader #they cloned tyrone #fontaine x black reader #☆° via writes °☆

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upslapmeal · 6 months

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Notes from the Taskmaster 16x10 recording

The last two episode recordings I went to, I meant to make comprehensive notes when I got home afterwards that I would be able to look back at and post when the episode aired. I did not, in fact, end up doing that. So this time I was determined to have lots of notes, and made them on the go in the breaks in recording. However. They were made in a rush and I never went back through them to pad them out (you'd really think I would have learned by now). So instead of just having to rely on my memory, I ended up with an almost coded list of words and phrases that it's taken me pretty much 2 weeks to sit down and decipher lol. So with that said:

the pre-episode Greg-Alex entertainment was Greg getting Alex to sing a song about a recent news story to the tune of a song suggested by the audience - in this case it was Trump's lawsuit (the one in May 2023 since there are...a few) to the tune of Wuthering Heights

Alex really went for the whole live thing, and was constantly referring to it throughout the episode

when the contestants came onstage, I obviously first saw Sam in his bright colours and blond hair

we were right on the back balcony and my first impression from that distance was that he kinda looked like Jamie Laing lol

Greg made a passing comment about how he's been dressing in grey but I was completely taken by surprise when the vt rolled and he looked completely different!

I had assumed he'd actually buzzed his hair and didn't realise it was a wig until the ep aired

Sue made comments throughout the episode about how Sam looked like Dahmer

Lucy's prize task story, unsurprisingly, went on for ages and included a whole story about the holiday they went on that I tragically cannot remember

I was so glad they didn't cut 'untaffled' because I looked through my notes before again before watching the episode and couldn't for the life of me remember what she'd said

Greg's said that his immediate response to naked Alex in the prize task was that he was 'smooth like an eel'

After Julian's prize task there was a discussion about how people wanted to be buried, and at one point (I wish I could remember the conversation leading up to this) either Greg or Alex said they would be buried 'together forever in the Victoria monument'

There was a whole long debate about whether Sam intended to use nature as part of his doughnut task, and whether the bird toppling Ms Doughnut to her death should be counted

Greg told Sam to 'convince me to give you 3 points'

Sam went on talking about how amazing nature is and how we're all connected and at one point said 'consider the statistics.....3000' (I'm 99% sure this is what he said and I didn't just forget the rest of the quote)

Julian's exercise name was absolutely not a one-off, to the point they started running a 'cunt count' for the episode

Sue talked about how she had recently had an ADHD diagnosis, and that she kept viewing tasks holistically rather than paying attention to the details. This was specifically in relation to the exercise where she just did the same thing 4 times

I'm not sure if we saw the full extended version of Hotel Taskmaster, but we definitely saw a cut that included more than the aired version (though tbh I think they do that for most tasks and I just noticed this one bc we got the extended version)

We got an 'I put it to you' from Greg that Alex-as-Qrs looked genuinely cool

Lucy described Alex as having 'tight metallic buns' which Greg later referred to as his 'robot arse'

I cannot stress how much of a breakdown Susan had in the studio about the forks and marbles - you get a glimpse in the episode but that was nothing!

Susan also took AGES to do her throw in the live task - she kept on being about to throw before being interrupted, or saying her arms were too short, or that she needed a wee, or having a fit of giggles, and the longer it went the worse it got lol

Greg and Alex also had a go at it, and Sue wanted another go without the pressure. Greg and Sue got the ball in but Alex didn't

Don't ask me to remember the context, but at one point during the record, Greg told a story about someone he knew (whose name he said he would tell the others backstage) who would have sex in a cow mask and would demand 'LOOK AT ME!!!'. Anyway that was referred back to a few times in the ep

When Sam was given the trophy he just stood near-motionless with it for what felt like ages before we got to the hugs and everything

And now we enter the magical world of ~what on earth was this note referring to~ where I just hope someone else who was there (@politicalprocrastinator how's your memory?) sees this and can fill me in on what I've forgotten:

At some point around the prize / first task I wrote 'correct dog guess'. Whose dog? What was being guessed? Absolutely no idea

At some point there was a joke about the 'former Prime Minister', I think the idea being that by the time the episode aired we'd inevitably have a new PM? but I honestly can't remember

Someone called someone else submissive in a way notable enough for me to have written 'submissive' as a one-word bullet point, but not notable enough for me to actually remember

And now three bullet points which I will present in their original form:

Birthday

Bum hole in back

Get in bath

#posted on reddit so I thought I'd put it here too #taskmaster #ramblings

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svltzmans · 8 months

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it's nice to have a friend - f.g.

a/n: hiii i love fiona so much and i love writing for her 🫶 thank you to dinosaur anon for requesting this one! it actually brought me tons of comfort to write so i appreciate it so much

warnings: cigarette smoking, mentions of sex, not proofread!

"debs, can you please just eat the lunch i make you?"

"but i just had peanut butter and jelly yesterday."

"we've been over this, peanut butter and jelly is the cheapest and easiest."

debbie huffs, storming off and taking her paper lunch bag with her.

monday is fiona's least favorite day of the week, for countless reasons. she has to return to making lunches and hundreds of other chores to make sure every one of her siblings is ready and at school on time.

it hurts to not be seen and appreciated for the work she does every day to keep her family afloat, even though she knows her siblings are still young and don't understand the magnitude of the impact she has on their worlds.

after successfully encouraging liam to take a nap and sending the others off, fiona finally gets to sit on the couch and breathe.

before she knows it, she's waking up to lip and ian walking through the front door. she figures she must have fallen asleep, her exhaustion having finally caught up to her.

"you're such an idiot," lip sneers, clearly in the middle of a fight with his brother.

fiona sighs, rubbing the sleep from her eyes and standing up.

"god, i need a cigarette," she mutters to herself, stepping outside onto the stairs and grabbing a lighter from her pocket.

"rough day, huh?" a voice asks from the sidewalk. fiona looks over to see her neighbor, y/n, standing in front of the house.

"to say the least," she responds, taking another puff of her cigarette.

"you know, if you ever want to sleep in or go out or something, i can watch the kids."

"for what, 100 an hour?" fiona asks, laughing to herself. she expects y/n to laugh too, but she's stonefaced.

"no, for nothing. i'm serious. i know it can't be easy dealing with this shit every day. you deserve a break."

fiona is shocked by y/n's response. she wasn't sure what to expect, but it wasn't free childcare.

"i'll let you know."

"cool. see you around."

fiona watches as y/n leaves, walking toward the grocery store on the corner. she can't help but be slightly suspicious of her offer, thinking she must want something in return. regardless, she smiles to herself, feeling like someone finally recognized how hard she is working.

"she definitely wants to get in your pants," lip insists. "she doesn't want any money?"

"no, she said she didn't. it does seem kinda suspicious, but she sounded so genuine about it."

"she must just be a really good flirt then."

"i don't know, lip. it seemed like she actually just wanted to help."

"okay, so let her. see what happens."

fiona lets herself imagine the possibility of having a few hours to herself. she could take herself out to eat, go on a walk, go to the store. she could do whatever she wanted with her day and not have to worry about her siblings being taken care of.

"i'll do it."

fiona stands tentatively on y/n's doorstep, debating on whether she should actually knock or not. lip could be right, or he could be completely misjudging the situation.

eventually, she forces herself to gently tap on the door, and it only takes a few seconds for y/n to open it.

"oh! hey fiona, what's going on?"

"i'm here to take you up on your offer."

"to watch the kids? yeah, of course. want me to come over now?

"that would be great, v and i are planning on going to get some dinner and drinks."

"sure, i can hang out with the kids until you get back."

"you're a lifesaver. how much do i owe you?" fiona feels inclined to pay y/n for her kind gesture, despite her declining money before.

"fiona, i told you you don't owe me anything. now, go enjoy your time with v."

reluctantly, fiona leaves for her dinner with v, silently praying that her siblings are in good hands.

y/n decides to cook something simple that she knows all the kids would enjoy, opting for pasta with a few different sauces to choose from.

fiona had told her siblings that their neighbor would be spending the afternoon in the house to make sure everything was under control, but they weren't expecting a meal.

"this is great, thank you y/n," ian smiles, finishing his plate and heading to his room.

the other kids nod in unison, agreeing with their brother's compliment.

y/n notices that liam had pretty much covered his entire face in sauce, and she can't help but to giggle to herself. she wipes his face clean with a cloth and gets the youngest gallagher ready for bed.

the rest of the siblings were used to their own routines and were in their rooms after dinner. in her solitude, y/n cleans the kitchen behind her, and eventually ends up giving the entire bottom floor a quick clean. she knows it would give fiona one less thing to worry about.

when fiona walks through the door at around midnight, she finds y/n sitting on the couch, watching whatever was on the television set.

"hey, welcome back. how was dinner?"

"really great. thank you again for doing th... did you clean the house?"

"yeah, i made the kids dinner and started by just cleaning up after myself, but i ended up just kinda doing the whole bottom floor."

"y/n this is... thank you so much. can i please pay you? at least a little bit? you are seriously amazing and i..." fiona stops, feeling herself start to ramble. she is in pure shock that anyone would care this much about her and her siblings. just out of the goodness of their heart.

"i'm happy to do this for you guys, seriously. you better not even dream about paying me, fiona," y/n smiles, feeling her heart grow warm seeing how much this meant to fiona.

"do you wanna, maybe stay? chat a little bit?"

"that sounds really nice, actually."

fiona and y/n quickly fall into stride with one another, and before they know it they have been talking for hours. they talk about just about everything, and by the end of it they are both feeling much more connected.

"shit, it's 3am," fiona laughs, finally looking at the clock.

"damn, that flew by. i should probably get some sleep."

"you and me both," fiona stands, y/n following suit.

"y/n?"

y/n turns, facing fiona.

"yeah?"

before y/n knows it, fiona is pulling her into a tight hug.

"thank you so much, again."

"any time. i mean it."

"before you leave, i have to give you something," fiona says, speed walking into the kitchen and returning with a small piece of paper.

"my number. if, you know, you wanna watch the kids again. or hang out with me, maybe," fiona smiles, nervously handing y/n the paper.

"both of the two will definitely be happening again," y/n responds, finally leaving the gallagher home and returning to her own.

the next day, fiona pulls lip aside.

"she's so amazing, lip. she really didn't want anything in return. she wanted to help. and she talked to me for hours."

"well, you better ask her on a date then, huh?"

"you think i should?"

"it seems like she's actually into you. and not just in a sex way."

fiona's cheeks turn a deep rose shade as she cracks a smile, earning a dry laugh from her brother.

"fi's in love!" he yells, running around the house as fiona chases.

when y/n wakes up the next morning, she's surprised to hear a gentle knock on her door.

when she opens it, she's surprised to see fiona on the other side, holding a bouquet of flowers.

"i know it's kinda early, but i wanted to give you these. and i wanted to ask if you wanted to go out for breakfast. my treat."

"it's never too early to see you, fiona. i'd love to go to breakfast with you. can i just have a second to change out of my pajamas?"

the pair both burst into laughter at the image of y/n in her pajamas, standing on the doorstep.

"that might be a good idea."

#fiona gallagher x fem reader #fiona gallagher x reader #fiona gallagher #fiona gallagher drabble #shameless x reader #shameless #shameless us #shameless fic #fiona gallagher fic #fiona gallagher x fem! reader

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ivyembracertifiedbitch · 18 days

Text

FHJY Finale Thoughts: Episode 20

Disclaimer: I know I've been really negative about the last two episodes but I do actually have real criticisms, and I will try my best to not be just 'I hate this' about everything. No promises though. Also, none of this is hating the IH or Bleem. I respect that they're very fucking tired when shooting this and don't have a week in between episodes to think, and so these criticisms are made with that in mind. Also feel free to debate and discuss, I just wanted to share my opinions and try to pinpoint where the narrative went wrong, or where BLeeM could've made a better DM choice, but I love hearing other people's thoughts!

The Battle

The allies: Again, they have too many advantages! There is no concern here! Also, having the allies would've been more helpful at the beginning of the fight. Now? When half of The Rat Grinders are dead? When they've already hurt Porter and Jace? We know how this goes, just break out the champagne already. I appreciate that Brennan made it a Nat 20 check though, that was for me. (I do like the callback to the calling for Sklonda and the police from the freshman year finale.)

Served up a plate of redemption arc: Let's be clear here. Fig did not try to give Ruben redemption. She helped brutally kill his friends and told him 'join us or meet the same fate.' And he stuck to his guns. I'm positive that if the Bad Kids had been remorseful at all, then Ruben would've given it some serious consideration, but like this? No dice.

Kipperlilly Copperkettle: Fucking W's this entire battle. That speech Brennan gave was undeniably false and full of contradictions though. She is the definition of what Aguefort defines as a hero, but because she's antagonistic to the Bad Kids, suddenly she's a villain or boring. Also, no practical application? She dug up a teacher's grave! She killed Buddy! She might've killed more people! Her stealth is just that good that she wasn't seen at all this year! There's no world where anyone can reasonably say she has no practical application.

Mary Ann: Yeah, again. The fact that she's willingly taking 18d10 lava damage to try and kill Fig, this is undeniably a meltdown, and if anyone makes fun of it, I'm meeting them in the parking lot outside. Also, telling her she chose the wrong team, they don't know TRG! Those are her friends! How dare they say she chose the wrong team, they didn't even choose their team! Whatever!

Jace and Porter: Let's be honest for a minute here, without them in episode 20, I don't think I would've even had the strength to finish the episode. (My take on their dynamic is Jace is over here having sex with his coworker and then Porter rage stars him. And gives him 6/7 kids to watch over. Jace isn't getting paid enough for any of this. Porter chose him because he's really fucking angry under the cheerfulness, and that would be useful as a worshipper. And sometimes they fuck. Also, they hate each other.) They're literally divorcing during this fight but they were never married. They're so fun!

Squeem and Balthazar: I think the problem with this fight is that it didn't feel serious enough. There was no worry for the Bad Kids, we knew Porter and Jace would be taken out, we had a ton of allies, the victory was guaranteed and so no one was taking it seriously. Because of that, we kinda lost the plot. In past IH seasons, they've been pretty good about keeping the tone of the finale serious, if not a little goofy, and it feels odd to just have a ton of bits in the finale and then try to go into emotional shit. None of it matters! The plot was set up in earlier episodes, but we didn't give a shit about it here! (I have no problem with them being funny, this is the chill 'nothing's serious' season, but also we've been serious before! We've had plot before! It's just kinda disappointing. Also, I don't give a shit about Squeem or Balthazar at all because they were here for maybe 1 or 2 episodes)

Dispel magics: Given the way the finale goes, I'm glad they didn't just pull out dispel magics on The Rat Grinders (the whole 'rage stars completely take over you and change your personality' bullshit is not my vibe), and I'm taking it to mean dispel magics probably didn't work after you've had the rage star for too long, but why? They were just kids too! Operating under the rage stars! They didn't even try to un-ragify any of TRG! No fucking empathy to be seen in this house.

Agent Cuspin Clark: I get that he's one of Brennan's self-inserts, he's also a cop, and only funny as a bit. I want him dead.

Ankarna: I would've liked to have seen more of a split, like, Porter is here and calling on her as the goddess of War, and Fig's here calling on her as the goddess of Justice. I would've liked some back and forth between her and the two of them. Like Porter being like 'kill them all' and Ankarna agreeing and Fig asking 'is this just?' and Ankarna being split between the two. As above, so below.

Divine Intervention: I'll be honest, just a solid fuck no. Fuck. No. I'm aromantic, so maybe this is something funny for the allo's, but I genuinely don't understand why. First off, like maybe only 5% of teenagers actually care about their virginity. They're all too busy with other things to worry about if they've had sex or not, no-one cares. Second, the idea that you HAVE to lose your v-card sometimes feels like it's bordering on the edge of sexual coercion. Sex is great, no-one should feel like they have to lose their virginity, or like any of that fucking matters. (I'm not blaming Fabian or Mazey, or any of the other Bad Kids, (I have some really good Thoughts™ on Fabian and his relationship with sex re: Sophomore Year, but that's not for this post) I think they're just parroting what they've heard and they don't realize what they're doing, but still.) And the fact that it's posed as an injustice and not, y'know anything to do with his family, or him being a maximum legend, or hell, the fact that he's going to have a half-sibling that his mother is going to be present for? Sex isn't that important. Also, I know it's funny to have an extremely powerful goddess do something funny, but I think it's an injustice (lol) to Ankarna to have her care about specifically this. Also, Ankarna's not mad about him lying to her? About him trying to kill her?

Epilogue

Riz being unfair to Fig and Kristen: I don't honestly think Riz has been unfair to Fig and Kristen throughout this season. (Yes, I'm mad he didn't do more introspection about him and Kipperlilly being foils. No, this is separate from that). Like, maybe if he had been forcing them to do it all on their own, then yeah. But he's out here helping Kristen's campaigns. He's taking stress tokens so Kristen can pass. He's helping Fig manage her workload and figure out what she wants to do with classes. And he does need them to do well so he can go to college so if he's a little overbearing, who cares? (Yeah I really think he should've had some introspection on him being similar to Kipperlilly. Because prevent change? Promoting fairness has like nothing to do with preventing change.)

Vignettes: Those were sweet honestly. Not a lot of notes there, it is a HARD pivot from silly to emotional, but it's sweet once you get over that.

Ankarna: I get that it's comedy, and it's really fucking funny to have a goddess be really fucking powerful and then turn around and make her nice or whatever, but Ankarna's not going to be a chill god! Even when she's not the goddess of war and conquest, her domain is summer, justice, conviction. None of these things are chill! These are all intense things, and justice can be very black and white. I don't know, I'm just annoyed that there's this running trend of 'if you're a god of the Bad Kids then you're nice, and if not, then you're either a dick or a turncoat or useless.' Gods are gods. They're fucking neutral, and people are either going to like them or hate them or not give a shit about them, but none of that means they're good or bad. Also, Fig's worship of Ankarna, despite how sweet it seems, really does have the feeling of 'he doesn't know what's good for you, but I do, and it's what you want to be (provided you want to be the uncorrupted version of you).' Which is very terms and conditions, I want you to be you as long as you are "good."

Hypocrisy: It's really funny that in the middle of battle, it's 'brutally kill the kids, even once we realize that a dispel magic has a chance of removing the rage stars' and outside of battle it's 'people aren't just black and white. they can be bad but they don't deserve to get sliced in half.' This is the function of DnD, to kill the bad guys mercilessly, which means playing with foils and doubt and anger doesn't work with a 2 episode combat finale.

Kalina: She wasn't evil. She simply wasn't. She's a fucking familiar, and tied to Cassandra, and can't be evil. This is full retcon behavior, and it fucking sucks. I hate it.

Mary Ann: I will scream it to the fucking roof if I have to, just because she's autistic, does not mean she was unaware. Just because she followed along with the plan at first, doesn't mean she didn't stay with the group for three years, full of rage. She's not evil either, she's 17 and fully manipulated, just like the rest of TRG. Every single IH is being weird about her. (But slay, for voting for yourself.)

Henry: He loves his nephew! Why isn't he doing anything? And if he was here the entire time, what, he's just fine that Fig eternally damned Ruben? Get yourself a personality!

Lucy: One, I think it's really funny if Lucy does in fact have a mini crush on Kristen and that's part of why Kipperlilly hates Kristen so much. Two, I am a firm believer in Lucy having also, at the very least, disliked the Bad Kids so I'm not a fan of her in the finale episode. Also, she's allowed to be glad they were killed, they killed her first, but to make no mention of Kipperlilly not coming back? Just nothing? (I adore Lucy being Kipperlilly's best friend and also crush, and Kipperlilly being Lucy's crush but Ruben being her best friend. The implications.) There was so much emphasis put on her coming back that to just have like 10 seconds of conversation with her and move on, dead wife montage for real.

The Rage Stars: Nope. Nope. Fucking nope. Nope. Forgetting everything they did? Then who gives a shit? They're all fucking innocent and nothing matters and you brutally killed 6 teenagers for no fucking reason and everything's sunshine and unicorns. Just, every teenager is so fucking angry, and the fact of being a teenager is you have to deal with the consequences. So if you full on beat up a dude, you have to go to school with them until you graduate (they'll get over it in like a month). Like, in reality, the rage stars most likely just amplify any rage they actually have, but don't completely change their personality. This season is about 'chaos isn't cute anymore,' so to have TRG do a bunch of shit but face no consequences is. The themes guys, the themes! Also, the idea that Oisin and Ivy remember more because what, they were more willing to be angry? Every single one of them was willing to be angry. And Kipperlilly's dead! Staying dead! Because she "willingly" chose it? After being manipulated by an older teacher, who we know is charming enough to deceive Fig and Gorgug, how willing do you think it was? But whatever!

Refusing to bring back KLCK: Honestly, refusing to bring back Kipperlilly highlights the problem a lot of people have with mental disorders, which is that you can be mentally ill, as long as you NEVER hurt anyone, or as long as you don't have an "evil" disorder. I've seen a lot of people headcanon Kipperlilly with more demonized disorders (I've seen BPD, Bipolar, OCD (real OCD, not the romanticized bullshit), personally I think she's repping us NPD peeps, but they're all great headcanons) and I think it really speaks to the way that some people see certain disorders as evil. You can be mentally ill, but god forbid you need attention to be normal, or have intrusive thoughts about murdering your best friend, or etc etc. Y'know what? God forbid mentally ill people do a murder.

Mary Ann "Redemption?": Just full on. If Mary Ann/Gorgug have 0 haters, assume I'm fucking dead and there's no afterlife. First off, the Bad Kids have been weird to her all season. Half of them have been terrified of her, and calling her evil, for tackling Gorgug, in a game where the MAIN GOAL is to tackle your opponents!! The other half of them have been infantilizing her and acting like she had no choice in anything and was just forced to join TRG. So the idea that she'd be just cool with that, is only acceptable if we take the idea that losing the rage star means you lose all the memories of what you did under the rage star. Also, the idea that as a female character, she's only redeemable (to Gorgug) if she's a potential romantic interest strikes me as misogynistic. Like, no! Just let her be a friend! I'd take weird sidekick friend over Gorgug's girlfriend. (None of this is on Mary Ann, she can have whoever she wants. I don't like the Bad Kids' side of it).

Worshiping Cassankarna going viral: I know the problem at the start of this season was that Cassandra didn't have enough followers, but also like the first essay Kristen writes is about how not every religion needs to have a ton of followers. Isn't it more important that people believe strongly than that you're well-known? (Also, them getting on Tracker for backing her religion with money, but making her religion go viral is like. Double standards.)

Arianwen: She lost her magic. How is she able to be a powerful wizard at work in the forest without magic? (Adaine and Aelwyn do deserve to kill her though, as a treat!)

Telemaine Lomenelda: Right, so that weirdly pointed racist remark he made to Riz, we're just going to be cool with that? Also, to leave Wolfsong in charge of Kei Lumennura and then turn around and be like, Tracker's not in charge anymore. Who's running Kei Lumennura? Nara? Because the IH seem to think she's too stupid for anything.

The child: That child is not Fabian's nemesis, it is the other way around, and he slowly falls in love and keeps pushing the date where he fights the kid back and back until it's just a family joke at that point. Fight with the wall. (I know, comedy show, this one's just a complaint. I think it's more funny if the child full on loves Fabian and he's over here like 'I will kill you when you're 18. Now, time for a nap!')

Wolfsong and Tracker: My thoughts on Wolfsong are just. Tracker wasn't doing anything wrong with Wolfsong. It's not like she went to a place and said 'your religion is wrong, worship my superior religion'. Tracker is providing a different view on Galicaea and we know not every elf believes the way she does! But she's not telling them they're wrong, she's leaving them alone! And having a little money is not the worst thing. Giving people a free place to sleep and free food is not the worst thing in the world. And calling Wolfsong a cult when the Bad Kids walked in, got a tent and hot chocolate and were able to have fun despite not being believers? (I know they're Tracker's friend, hush) Like, she cares about people and she's giving them somewhere to go. And they're not in a basement covered in mosquito bites so is it all bad? It does feel like a nice 'gotcha' moment for the IH so they can be like 'we were right for completely distrusting our close friend and her religion and her girlfriend, because that's what good friends do!'

Girlfriends and exes: Look, if Tracker and Kristen want to be messy exes who get back together again, I'm fucking all for it. I love them in an off again on again situationship. I also love Gertie and Naradriel, and it really feels like this is just to reward Kristen, and not like, an actual decision Tracker would've made. Also, calling Naradriel stupid? I am always up to bat for her! I can not stop defending her or people will think she's just a dumb kid! I think Gertie should absolutely hold a grudge, but to make her be all 'you should've never kissed me if it wasn't going to be forever' and then everyone laughing at Gertie feels iffy. Because that is how it feels in high school, and obviously that's a stupid way of feeling, but it's equally real and valid. And also it feels like another 'gotcha!' moment for Kristen to be like 'yes, I'm hurting someone's feelings, but they're being weird about it so it's fine, and I'm still a good person.'

See Episode 19 thoughts here

#for the 'which is fine's: i do genuinely think some of these choices were good character choices just not good narrative choices #i did like this season and up to the finale it actually seemed fun. i just think there was some problem with having three different #antagonists (1. the rat grinders 2. stress 3. jaceporter) and ankarna + cassandra's corruption as a plot point and trg being foils to the #bad kids as a plot point + their individual story arcs. it was all really ambitious and with the strike happening during i think it was too #much to put together in a good narrative under the deadline #but y'know. egg on my face for getting attached to the ''villain''#the rat grinders #the bad kids #kristen applebees simulacrum #porter cliffbreaker #jace stardiamond #squeem fh #balthazar fh #ankarna fh #cassandra fh #mazey phaedra #kalina fh #henry hopclap #lucy frostblade #arianwen abernant #telemaine lomenelda #tracker o'shaughnessey #gertie bladeshield #princess naradriel #fhjy #mine

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tsams-confessions · 5 months

Text

quite the fandom, isnt it?

dont forget your daily clicks

palestine masterpost

donate

good timezone and welcome to tsams confessions. have an opinion you dont want traced back to your account? frustrated and need a place to yell? just want to sit back and watch whatever drama of the week unfold without actually having to participate? this is the place for you. you can submit just about anything, but there's a few rules

note: while i do accept good-faith criticisms of my judgements in terms of what is and is not allowed here, remember that this is my blog and will operate how i want it to. dont like that? block button's right there. i very rarely respond to hate so dont waste your time

we are no longer allowing people to be mentioned by name. there weren't any major incidents to spark this decision, but the three we got were just spreading rumors about the people in question and that's not what we want here

if you are mentioned/vagued in a post and would like it taken down, or if you sent your own confession and want it removed, please reach out off anon. it has to be the person themself that was involved, we will not take things down at the request of someone else

dont be a dick needlessly. i dont want to see shit like "x child's art sucks" thats not a confession thats just mean

Please don't discuss the solarmoon incest debate. Discussing the ship itself is allowed still

apparently this needs to be added. if we deem your confession to be racist/queerphobic/ableist/etc we will delete it 5a. apparently this also needs to be added. please stop calling characters psychopaths/sociopaths just because they do bad things. that alone will make me delete your confession 5b. please dont make light of the topic of genocide. talking about ruin and his mass killing is fine, just be mindful of her words

Do not censor yourself. This is not tiktok, there is no algorithm, all you are doing is making it difficult to read (or even impossible with a screenreader) and making it harder for people to avoid those topics as needed

just. try to use common sense

other than that, we'll post just about anything we receive even if we disagree with it. that doesnt mean we wont comment on it in the tags though, please keep in mind we are not pretending to be unbiased. we also are not a reliable source of information, do your own research

blog runs on queue, 12 posts from 12pm to 11pm est every day. will increase and decrease as needed

i will block anyone that makes me uncomfortable enough. no, it doesn't necessarily mean what you did was "wrong." i can block for any reason i please, and complaining about it to me is not going to change my mind. accept it and move on.

thats all for now. mod 1blood, signing off

#mod 1blood #not a confession #sun and moon show #tsams #what other tags do i use here #the sun and moon show #sams #i dont wanna put this in character tags. that should be fine for now

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thehusbandoden · 5 months

Text

Midoriya Izuku x OFA Related Reader Headcannons

A/n: here's the request. For some reason my account is acting weird with requests and I don't wanna risk losing them so I'm doing it differently.

I'm so sorry it took so long! I wanted to write a fic but it wasn't working lol.😅

If you want something changed/want to request something else, please please contact me!

General info:

Genre: fluff + sllight angst \\ wc: 902 \\ posted: 01/01/2024 \\ requested

Your parents died when you were about six. They were bystanders of a villain attack, and All Might unfortunately didn't get there in time. All Might felt incredibly guilty, even though he knew that he did his best.

His guilt tripled when he found out that the couple had a daughter. He was very invested in your future, and immediately offered to adopt you when he found out you didn't have anyone to take you in.

After a while of debating and arguing, the government finally allowed All Might to adopt you. He took a few months off of work to bond with you and get to know you. He hired a full-time nanny to help take care of you while he was at work.

As you grew, he secretly hoped you would be able and willing to take on his quirk and be the next successor.

A few years pass by, and you haven't developed your quirk. All Might had taken you to your doctor multiple times, but he didn't see anything wrong. You were just a late bloomer.

All Might continued to smile, comforting you whenever you felt like a failure.

At your request, and probably a little bit of All Might's own desires, he started training you a week after your tenth birthday. You were amazing, and All Might was sure you would become the next successor.

Until your quirk came.

On your fourteenth birthday, you received your quirk. It was amazing and powerful, yes, but there was one problem...

It was completely incompatible with OFA.

The news devastated you and put you in a pit of depression for a few weeks.

All Might tried his best to reassure you, but you were too caught up in your own self-pity.

Five weeks later, you finally accepted it. You allowed and appreciated the comfort All Might gave you and started to rethink your life's plan.

After a few more weeks of recovery, you asked All Might to help you train your quirk.

It was tough, and almost overwhelming at times, but with All Might's support and the many professionals he hired with similar quirks, you prevailed.

You were behind your fellow classmates by several years, but made up for it by the relentless hours you trained with several pros.

By the time Middle school was ending, you were equal if not far surpass your classmates. You made it into UA by recommendation.

During the months before UA, All Might introduced you to Midoriya Izuku... his new successor.

They were both nervous about your reaction, but pleasantly surprised when you took the news well.

You and Izuku ended up getting along quite well. You quickly became friends, and you helped him with both preparing for and controlling his new power.

You became very close, becoming inseparable from each other.

Izuku slowly began to master his new power with your help, filling you with pride.

Helping him achieve his dream helped you to feel better about your failure.

Both of you developed feelings for one another but didn’t admit it- even to yourselves.

You always denied accusations of your crush thrown at you by the majority of Class 1-A.

It got so bad that Bakugo screamed at you across the hallway, demanding that you and “stupid Deku” stop being wimps and actually confess to one another.

Izuku was in hearing range, and you almost died from embarrassment.

Luckily, no one mentioned it.

It wasn’t until you worriedly entered the hospital, walking down the hall as your eyes flickered from room to room, anxiously looking for his number.

Your eyes met with the room number, and your heart thundered against your chest as you hurried inside, tears forming at the corners of your eyes as your eyes laid on the broken body of Izuku.

He got so worried when he saw your tears, trying to sit up to comfort you.

At the sight of him hurting himself, you grew angry.

Your lips contorting into a snarl, you gently push him back into bed, glaring at him.

“We’ll talk about this... foolish behavior later.” You growl, your e/c orbs boring into his emerald ones.

After he healed the two of you shyly confessed. He took you on a date, and you became official three days later.

You spent even more time together, sitting closer, and staring more openly.

Neither of you denied your feelings anymore- even though you didn’t tell anyone.

Almost everyone knew but you didn’t really care.

You were able to help him whenever he struggled to control or understand OFA, and you were the first one to recognize what was happening and to jump into help.

You ended up engaged three months after you graduated from UA and married seven months after that. Izuku heavily relied on your knowledge, asking you for help or for advice.

You both became well-known heroes, and you both went back and forth from number one and number two.

Bakugo surpassed you once- for two months.

Izuku was secretly fuming, fighting harder for his position.

He had a smug smirk on his lips as you regained your ranking, wrapping an arm around your waist as he pressed a kiss to your cheek, not caring about the cameras.

The affectionate act was all over the news the next day.

He fainted when he saw the pictures and the clip the next morning, profusely apologizing when he woke up.

~~~~~

Izuku's masterlist | Masterlist | Navigation | You can tip me here <3

Reblogs and feedback are greatly appreciated <33

~~~~~

Do not copy, repost, nor plagiarize my work. Ask before you translate or use my work in any way -minus reblogging.

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by-seven · 2 years

Note

Pretty please I was thinking Xavier Thorpe x Reader sort of based off ‘You Belong With Me’ By Taylor Swift and it’s basically just Xavier’s best friend pinning to him their entire lives and has to suffer in the side lines of him and Bianca’s relationship while their friendship slowly dies only to be reignited after Xay and Bianca break up and maybe ‘prom’ could be the Rave’N dance?

think i know it's with me (oneshot)

resp : this trope be hitting like a brick. idk if i can write it as good as it's supposed to feel but here's my take on it!!

word count: 3, 169 (what the actual fuck)

angst, fluff, Bianca is only mentioned

(i forgot about the prom thing oh my god)

You're on the phone with your girlfriend, she's upset She's going off about something that you said 'Cause she doesn't get your humor like I do

"Oh please, it wasn't even that bad. Your humor's not that great, Principal Weems could probably make me laugh faster than you ever could." you say in between bites of the pizza you were sharing with Xavier in the quad.

"I don't know, man. Principal Weems can't do the griddy as good as I can." he supplied, trying to sound present but you know from the slight scrunch of his eyebrows that he's thinking of something else.

Xavier Thorpe has been your friend ever since you were both still in your diapers. You could say best friend and it wouldn't be wrong but he'd probably disagree and call you his glorified armrest (given the fact that he could very easily rest his arm on the top of your head) to annoy you.

Right as you were about to do another dig at his (not-really-dry) sense of humor, his phone started ringing.

You rolled your eyes and looked away after Xavier gave you a look that spelled out i'm sorry i have to take this call and also help me i think i'm fucked.

He was right, he was incredibly fucked. That one annoying ringtone has served as an omen of an impending argument with his oh so perfect siren goddess girlfriend, Bianca Barclay.

Looking back at him and finding him still looking at you, you raise your brows in question, "Go ahead, Xavier. Answer the call of the hell-bringer."

Breathing in and doing a heavy sigh, Xavier answered the call. The phone wasn't even on speaker but Bianca's voice sounded like it came out of a megaphone.

"That was way out of line, Xavier! You may be my boyfriend but it doesn't give you the right to make fun of my appearance."

"Bianca, I literally only said that your eyes looked like that one Miley Cyrus meme. It's not that deep." You had to hold in a laugh as you heard the incredibly shallow reason that sparked the argument.

"But if it made you feel bad, then I'm sorry. I..." you turn to him with a look of confusion, after all why is he apologizing when he did nothing wrong? But Xavier just met your gaze and then looked away. "I apologize."

"This is the second time this week that you've made me feel bad, Xavier."

Getting frustrated you stand up and fix your uniform, getting ready to leave your best friend to talk with Bianca. Xavier notices, looks up at you and grabs you by the wrist. He mouths, 'please stay.'

Taken back by the sudden touch of his hand on yours, you froze where you stood.

"I know, I'm really sorry. Let's meet at the Weathervane tomorrow? Grab some coffee and talk about it."

You harshly forced your hand out of his and walk away, heading to your room. Upon reaching the doors to the dormitories, you hear footsteps behind you. Turning around, you were faced with Xavier.

Panting and standing right in front of you closely (too fucking close), he opens his mouth to speak. Before he could, though, you turned back around and made your way up the stairs.

"Hey, hey." He calls after you but you just continued to go up the stairs.

He calls your name and grabs your hand, and that made you stop. "What's wrong?"

"What's wrong? What's wrong is you forgetting about our plans for tomorrow, Xavier. We were gonna celebrate my debate win, remember?" You wince, realizing how bad your words sound. They sound so desperate, so trivial.

"I promise I'll make it up to you. I just.. I really need to fix this stuff with Bianca."

You hummed in response, but nodded anyway. After all, you didn't have the right to be mad.

Xavier lets you go, sensing that you need some time alone to process your emotions. You make your way to your room, thankful that Yoko wasn't there to witness the emotions you let out.

The friend can't compete with the lover after all.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

I'm in the room, it's a typical Tuesday night I'm listening to the kind of music she doesn't like And she'll never know your story like I do

The day after, Xavier got back from the Weathervane exhausted. The remnants of his date making their presence known with the way he speaks during your phone call.

Not wanting to tire him further, you settled for a Spotify session instead. You two take turns showing each other songs that the other might like and adding them to a collab playlist. It's become a habit of yours to sketch while on Spotify sessions with Xavier, so along with the music came the faint scratching of your pencil on paper.

You had to listen with your headphones though, as Yoko was also doing something on her side of the room and you don't want to disturb her.

"Okay, okay but listen to this one by Matt Maltese." You say as you changed the song from Fallen Star by The NBHD to Everyone Adores You.

Everybody thinks of you when they sleep at night

When I say 'everybody', I'm actually referring to me

As you hum along, a faint echo of the song plays from the room in front of yours. Across your window, Xavier was listening along.

"That was another good one. I have one that I think you'll like up next but don't look at the queue."

"Hmm? Okay, if you say so."

The song you played comes to an end and a song by Cigarettes After Sex starts to play. Your sketching stopped, seemingly in sync with the increase of your heartbeat.

Opera House was playing as you placed you pencil down and closed you eyes.

"So, do you like it or...?" Xavier asks after the obnoxious loss of your rambling.

He calls your name out again, and you notice how it sounds so different coming from him. How it sounded so divine, like it was a sound made just for him to speak.

"Ah, um. Yeah, I love it, actually. I didn't know you listened to Cigarettes After Sex?" you ask, trying to fill in the silence on your part.

"I've just started listening to them. Noticed you liked them a lot so I decided to give them a try."

You hum in response, unable to focus as you process the lyrics of the song.

I was meant to love you and always keep you in my life I was meant to love you, I knew I loved you at first sight

Did he listen to the lyrics before? Or did he just send you this because he liked the way it sounds? So many questions popping up, one after another. You snapped out of it when you heard him calling your name again.

"Bianca's calling me.." He says reluctantly, waiting for your reply.

"Oh, okay. Um, it's fine. It's getting late anyway. Have a good talk. Good night, Xavier."

"Thanks for tonight. Bye." The end-tone plays momentarily. You take off your headphones and tidy up your table.

"Are you sure you two are not dating?" "HOLY FUCK!" "Cause like, that's definitely not just-friends behavior." Yoko blurted out of nowhere, startling you.

"NO! No, definitely not. He's dating Bianca." You say as you make your way to your bed.

"Oh, shame. You two would've made a better couple."

We would've. We could've. But I just didn't have the guts to tell him how I feel.

"Hmm." You hummed in reply. "Good night, Yoko."

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Walk in the streets with you in your worn-out jeans I can't help thinking this is how it ought to be Laughing on a park bench thinking to myself Hey, isn't this easy?

"Anyways, I just feel like Miss Thornhill's too stressed about the RaveN. She's been dropping things a lot during class right?" You say as you kick the poor lonesome pebble you found on the pavement along with you as you walk on the campus paths.

"Dude, I got startled when she dropped that pot with the black dahlia. Heard she was taking good care of it too." Xavier replies, to which you chuckled because to say he was startled is an understatement.

"Startled? You literally kissed the table when it happened, that's what you get for dozing off."

"The table was lucky that day then."

"Oh please, you think too highly of yourself."

"The truth is the truth."

"And all you've been saying are lies. Anyway, we're here. Let's sit down before we miss it!" You say as you approach the bench facing away from the main building. The sky was clear and there were no obstructions blocking your view of it. You both sat on the bench and looked up, waiting for the meteor shower.

You take your earphones and plug it in your phone. You look to your side and see Xavier holding out his hand, asking for the other earbud.

"Oh my fucking god. The Xavier Thorpe asking to share earphones with a girl that's not his girlfriend? I can imagine Sinclair's face if she finds out. And Bianca's too." You exclaim jokingly as you hand him an earbud.

"Everyone knows we're close friends, so it doesn't really matter."

friends. doesn't really matter.

"Oh, yeah." You hope you didn't sound disappointed. " Of course."

You put your playlist on shuffle and look up at the sky as Affection by Cigarettes After Sex plays.

It's affection always, You're gonna see it someday My attention's on you Even if it's not what you need

I think of you, I want you too, I'd fall for you

The universe is cruel, you concluded. Why would this song play, out of all the songs in your playlist, right now? At this very moment, when you're alone with your best friend whom you've liked for years now. it's like a forceful confession brewed by the universe.

"Look! It's so pretty." You exclaim, pointing to the first glimmer of light from the sky.

"I know, it really is pretty."

You look at Xavier, finding him not looking up at the sky but at you. He quickly looks up though, but you still caught the way his eyes lingered just a bit too long on yours.

Maybe the universe isn't that cruel after all.

"By the way..." "Hmm?" "I know I promised you that we'd go to the RaveN together this year, but.."

And there it is, but. You didn't have to guess to know why.

"Bianca wanted to be my date for this year. I hope you understand."

You look away, trying to make the sting from your eyes go away. It was expected, how could you be so dumb to even think that he'd go with you?

"Yeah, it's fine. I figured you'd go with her. Have fun at the party then." You looked back at him after wiping your eyes, hoping that the tears weren't obvious.

"Tha- wait. What do you mean 'have fun at the party'? Your'e not going?" He asks, his face and voice laced with confusion (and disappointment, but maybe you'd imagined it).

"No, I'd look so miserable going alone. Plus, I have to finish my book." You give him a smile, hoping that it looks genuine.

"Are you sure? I can ask Ajax to take you-"

"God no, Enid would claw my eyes out." You laugh, but it sounded dry. "I promise, it's fine."

"Nothing I can do to change your mind? I can ask Bianca if I can go with you."

"No, Xavier. You have to go with her, she's your girlfriend after all. I'm just your friend, you should go together."

You tried not to take notice of the way your own words stung. (And how it seems to have hurt Xavier too, the way his brow scrunched when you said just friends was not exactly subtle)

"Oh, okay. Yeah, you're probably right." He sighs and looks up at the sky. You look up too.

"Fuck, clouds covered our view."

"We should probably get inside, it's 3am. And it's starting to drizzle." You say, standing up. The drizzle was staring to get heavier and your clothes were getting wet. you were pretty sure you were gonna get a cold.

You noticed Xavier taking off his coat and before you could protest, he's already put it over your head to shield you form the rain.

"But what about you?" You ask him, worried.

"Don't worry, I'll be fine." He assured you. You then made your way back to the dormitories.

Xavier insisted on dropping you off right at your door, so that's what he ended up doing.

"Thanks for the botched meteor shower observation, idiot. And thanks for letting me borrow your coat."

"Wow, some actual kind words from you? The world must be in trouble." He says sarcastically.

"Oh, shut up Thorpe. You should get going now, we have a 7am period tomorrow."

"Oh fuck you're right! Bye."

"Night." You say as he turns to leave. You close the door gently, so as not to wake Yoko.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

And you've got a smile That can light up this whole town I haven't seen it in a while Since she brought you down You say you're fine, I know you better than that Hey, what you doing with a girl like that?

"Hey, you okay?" You ask Xavier. You're getting worried, he' s been in a sour mood all day. Not even bothering to talk to you, or to anyone at all. You knew it had something to do with Bianca, as you heard them screaming at each other in his room.

"Yeah, 'm fine."

"You sure?"

"Yes."

"Like, really sure?"

"Damn it, I said I'm fine okay?! Why can't you understand that? You're getting so annoying, it's so infuriating. Why can't you understand that not everyone wants your sunshine personality all the time? You are so irritating."

Frozen in your seat, you look at him with wide eyes. Xavier has never lashed out on anyone, especially at you. So this caught you by surprise.

You didn't even notice you were crying until he looked at you. His face was a mixture of shock and disbelief (you hope it was aimed at himself).

He says your name, but it didn't sound nice anymore. It sounded like a bad omen, like a dark cloud that promises a storm and you were a girl with a body made of paper.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to-"

"I didn't mean to annoy you. I'm sorry, I'll leave." You say, frantically walking to your own room. You were walking too fast, your eyes blurred by your tears that you tripped on the stairs. You had a cut on your forehead, but the physical pain couldn't combat the pain you felt inside you.

As you curled up in your bed, missing your classes for the rest of the day, you hoped that Xavier would show up at your door. Knowing him, he'd probably apologize a thousand times.

You waited hours, the mid-afternoon light fading into the bluish glow that 6pm brings but Xavier still hasn't knocked.

Maybe you never really knew him after all.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

You were looking at the sky from the rooftop of the academy, watching the sunset paint the sky with different shades of love.

Purple. Blue. Red. Orange. Pink

You feel the presence of another coming up from behind you, making you turn around and whip your arm out as a defense mechanism.

Xavier catches your hand, lowers it but never letting you go. His hold loosening but his touch never leaving.

You look at him properly, his eyes heavy with tiredness. It's been a week after he lashed out on you. A week of no contact. A week of pure torture. Within a week, the cut on your forehead has now turned from red to a dark brown. The cut on your heart hasn't healed as fast the the one on your forehead.

"Let go." You ask him but he doesn't budge.

"Xavier, let go. Please." And then he did. Your arms now hung uselessly beside your body, and you hate the way they crave the warmth of his hands.

He says your name, it feels like a trigger as been pulled and the gun was pointed at your chest.

"Please-"

"I heard about what happened. If you're here to blame me for your breakup with Bianca, then leave. She's already done that, I don't need you to repeat the shit she said."

"Listen, I'm sorry. Yes, we broke up but this is not about that."

"Then what is this about?"

"Us. About me and you. I'm sorry I said all those hurtful things to you. I didn't mean to hurt you, I wouldn't dare to hurt you. I was just so stressed, with Bianca and the truth."

"What do you mean, Xavier? Stop speaking in riddles."

"Bianca. I think she used her abilities on me. I saw her siren song one of her friends to do what she wants and I realized that what if she did it to me? It all makes sense, when I'm with her it's like my body is on autopilot. Like, I can't control the things I do. But when I'm with you it's like I'm myself, you know? I was so fucking confused, but now I see the truth."

You couldn't speak. Couldn't even utter a single word. To say you were speechless is an understatement.

Xavier steps closer to you, the tips of your shoes touching. He holds your arm with one hand gently and tips your head up to meet his gaze with the other.

"It's you. It's always been you. Whenever I wanted to draw or paint, I'd find myself making portraits of you. I started listening to the songs you liked. I turn around when I hear your name. God, it was so fucking obvious. It's you."

His hand slides down from your arm to your hand, intertwining your fingers with his.

"I think I know where I belong, now." He says, smiling. The most genuine smile you've even seen him give. And as you stare into his eyes, they seemed to pull you in.

You never learned how to swim but you wouldn't mind drowning in his eyes. You never liked to drink but you wouldn't mind getting intoxicated by his presence.

Xavier Thorpe, the man you've pined for. The man you've watched from the sidelines. The man you love, now finally yours.

You stared at his eyes, then at his lips. Before you could move, his lips meet yours and it's like an explosion of colors and all things nice. You bring your hands up to his hair, burying your fingers in the softness of them.

Breathless and lovesick, you break away from him and smile. Blissfully, you say:

"Think I know it's with me."

#xavier thorpe x reader #xavier thorpe #reader insert #wednesday tv series #what the fuck i strayed away from my plotline #this doesn't make sense but i've already written it

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chrissy-kaos · 6 months

Note

Hey!!

I just wanted to tell you I think it’s so cool how you continue to play hockey even if it’s a beer league! I mean I don’t know what good adult leagues there are when you’re older really 😅

I miss playing hockey so much and I always just figured it would be impossible to get taken seriously by judgmental fucks. I love that you make history even though you’re just yourself. I do sort of despise some of the things I’ve heard in the locker room too tbh.

It’s so amazing to see you gear up and get sweaty. It makes me some how feel seen too and I feel like I need to just figure it out lol. I know your kicking ass out there (cus I saw u posted ur stats) lol 💜 hope you have a good rest of your weekend 💜

Thank you! Yea posting about me playing wasn’t something i was really going to do. But everyone here seems to love that content and they continue to ask for it. So I’m going to keep posting it. I don’t think I’m anything special or making history. I’m just a girl that wants to play hockey. That’s it. If I inspire others to play than that’s awesome! Because hockey is amazing and growing the game is important! With that said I’m going to share a bit of a story with you. So bear with me.. I tend to over share 😅

Hockey is something I’ll never give up. For a long time my life centered around it. I’m fortunate enough to live in a town that’s had multiple pro teams and a great hockey community. I used to coach/play for one of the teams before my transition. When I was debating if I was going to transition or not hockey played a part in it for sure. I didn’t want to never play again. But I was scared that people wouldn’t accept me and all that. I felt like majority of the community liked me and enjoyed my coaching. But you never actually know how someone feels about it, ya know.

When I finally made my decision I was coaching full time and I decided to step away from hockey not necessarily for good but until I was comfortable with myself. So I resigned and hung my skates up. Then started my transition. It was a little after two years into my transition when I decided to step on the ice again. I had played some roller with a few friends and messed around stick handling in the house but I never went back to the rink.

(I actually find this hilarious 😂.) I seen they had a skate and shot and decided I’d go to it. Not skating for two years I needed to get my legs back anyway. So I show up to the rink. It’s still all the same people that worked there when I did. I walked up to the counter to pay and my friend Josh was working and said “hi ma’am, here for stick time?.” He had no idea I started to transition. I said “hi, Josh.” He looked at me like I was crazy and asked if he knew me. I gave him the money and said “you might” then walked away. He stopped me to tell me where the women’s locker room is. I smiled and said thank you.

I skated like crap. To be expected tho. After the time was up I headed to the locker’s. Josh stopped me and asked how I knew him. So I told him who I was and it blew his mind 😂. He congratulated me and said he had no idea. He told me he was thinking to himself damn this girl is good(I actually suck lol). He was like who the fuck is she?. He thought I was one of the college players. Our local college and pro team share the rink together. Anyway he was completely blown away. The interaction was great and positive. He was very supportive. After that I started coming once a week and more people realized who I was.

Everyone was extremely supportive and accepting. They use my chosen name and pronouns. Even offered me a coaching position again. I declined for reasons. But the hockey community in general is amazing. I felt comfortable enough to hop in our league. It’s our house A league so all the best players current pros, ex pros and d1-3 guys. It’s extremely competitive. I’m still the only girl ☠️ lol

Now I can’t speak for any other community but at no point in time have I been treated bad or different. I’m given the same respect as everyone else. Do guys talk in the lockers probably but they are nothing but respectful and courteous to me. If you want to get out and play don’t let anyone stop you.

Hockey is for everyone and you deserve to play too! Just go for it! You never know unless you try. Hockey has one of the best lgbtqiia+ communities in all of sports. There are teams like @teamtrans-icehockey where you can play with people like us who understand the difficulties of being trans/nb/queer in sports. I’ve played with teams trans a few times and they are an incredible group of people! I highly recommend checking them out!

(I took this pic the on the way to the rink that first time back. Don’t mind the filter and how pudgy I am 🫣)

#hockey is for everyone #ice hockey #hockey #hockey girl #trans hockey player #trans hockey #teamtrans-icehockey #transgender #trans #transisbeautiful #mtf hrt #trans pride #ask #ask ask ask #ask me questions #long post

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wzrd-wheezes · 11 months

Text

Our Band - Part 3. Remus Lupin x Reader

AN- sorry that it's taken so long for me to get part three out! I've been super busy with work over the last week or so, so havent had much time to write. As always, please let me know if you enjoyed this part, and if you want another part as well!

2k words.

Remus Lupin x reader band au

Part 1, Part 2,

Y/N had been debating whether to go to Remus’s concert or not ever since he mentioned it to her the other day. She felt unsure about seeing him outside of work. The coffee shop was like a safety blanket to her, where she could busy herself tidying something when he flirted. It would be different seeing him in a setting like this, where she couldn’t easily escape. Part of her was excited, she had a soft spot for Remus, not that she would ever admit it to him, but she did enjoy his company whenever he stopped by her work.

Remus and the others were already at the venue, having arrived earlier in the day to soundcheck. They were currently in the green room, a small room at the back of the venue that was dimly lit. Various sofas and chairs littered the room, which the group had draped themselves over. Remus was sprawled out over one of the sofas, his long legs hanging over the arm. A cigarette hung from his lips and a beer bottle dangled from his fingers.

“Do you actually reckon she’ll come tonight then?” Sirius asked, swiftly stealing Remus’s cigarette from his lips and putting it between his own. Remus feebly tried to swat him away, rolling his eyes at the dark-haired boy.

“’Course she’ll come.” he said matter-of-factly, “why wouldn’t she?”

“Because you’re an arrogant, cocky, prick who turns up at her work and harasses her,” James chuckled, taking a sip of his beer. Remus snatched his cigarette back from Sirius and sat upright, resting his elbows on his knees.

“I don’t harass her, Prongs.” he took a drag of his cigarette, “I’ve just never met a girl like her before.”

“What? One that doesn’t instantly fall at your feet?” Lily laughed, resting her head against James’ shoulder, “It’s about time you were humbled.” James and Sirius sniggered at her comment. It was true though, Remus had never had to put this much effort in to getting a girl to like him, they usually threw themselves at him. He wasn’t used to it, and he found it slightly infuriating.

“Can I nick a tenner off you, Moony?” Sirius asked, suddenly standing up, “after your reaction to me stealing your cigarette, I think I’m gonna go and buy my own.”

“So, you’re going to go and buy a pack of cigs with Remus’s money?” James laughed, “very clever, Pads.”

Remus fished into his pocket and threw his wallet at Sirius before announcing that he was nipping to go and get some more beers and leaving the room. Sirius rummaged through his wallet looking for some money, he stopped frozen for a second as his fingers skimmed across something.

“Look at what I just found in Loverboy's wallet!” he exclaimed, holding it up.

Pinched between his fingers was the polaroid picture that Remus had took of Y/N a few nights ago. James stood up to take a closer look at it, smirking slightly.

“God, he’s down bad.” James laughed.

“Oi, Lil, chuck us the camera out of Moony’s bag, would you?” Sirius asked, his eyes glinting mischievously. Lily did so, passing him the camera. Sirius quickly snapped a photo of himself and waited for it to print. He grabbed a marker from the side and scribbled on the back of it “To Loverboy, Love from Padfoot <3” and switched it for the picture of Y/N. Sirius slipped the picture of Y/N and a ten-pound note from Remus’s wallet into his pocket and left the room, chuckling as he walked.

“Moony’ll go mad when he realises he’s taken that.” James said, a grim smile on his face.

Y/N arrived at the venue around twenty minutes before the concert was about to start. She didn’t really know what to do with herself. Assuming that Remus would just find her after the gig, she made her way over to the bar and ordered herself a drink, hoping that it would calm her nerves a little bit. The venue wasn’t huge, probably only holding a thousand or so people, but they were packed in like sardines. The air was filled with excited chatter as the crowd waited for the band to come on stage.

The room went dark, and everyone went quiet, waiting with anticipation for the band to come on stage. Suddenly, the room was filled with bright coloured lights and the music began. The crowd absolutely erupted, as Remus, Sirius, James and Lily walked on stage. The smoke that filled the stage began to clear, showing the big black backdrop that had “Marauders” written on it in large white writing.

Remus took place in centre stage, a guitar hung lazily across his body and a microphone at his lips. He was wearing an outfit that he usually wore, black jeans, baggy black t-shirt and a pair of boots, yet this time he seemed to have left his infamous leather jacket off stage. Sirius was on his right, a guitar also in hand, Lily was on bass guitar, and James on drums. The four of them looked amazing and they moved effortlessly around the stage as they played.

Hearing Remus sing live was a completely different experience to listening to their album in the record store. Remus’s vocals were raspy, rough and raw yet seemed to spill from his lips like honey. When he wasn’t playing guitar, his fingers were wrapped confidently around the microphone stand, his silver rings glinting in the light. Y/N felt awestruck as she watched him. Remus’s gaze was fixed on the audience, his eyes constantly darting over them, taking in their reactions, smiling and letting it fuel him. The band carried on playing, taking advantage of the crowd’s energy, feeding off of it, their music becoming stronger with every chant and cheer. Remus and Y/N’s eyes locked for a moment and she swore to God that she saw him wink at her.

The band finally ended their performance. James threw his drumsticks into the crowd, Sirius jumped down over the barrier to sign some autographs for some girls in the front row, Remus saluted to the crowd, grinning cockily as he walked off stage. The crowd cheered; Y/N joined in feeling a rush of adrenaline. Seeing the band live was surreal, and seeing Remus on stage singing was even more so.

“Ah, there she is! My number one fan!” Remus’s voice suddenly appeared behind Y/N. She turned round to look at him, unable to keep the grin off her face.

“You guys were – wow.”

“I thought you’d say that.” he said, cocky smile playing on his lips, “C’mon, let’s go get a drink.”

He snaked an arm around her waist and she felt her heart beat a little faster and her palms growing sweaty as he pulled her towards him. She had never been this close to him before. As he led her backstage to where there was a private bar, she looked down at his arm around her waist and felt a blush creep onto her cheeks.

Sirius, James and Lily were all stood at the bar together, drinks in hand and chatting away. Sirius beamed as he spotted Remus walking towards them.

“I wondered where you’d gotten to,” he grinned, “C’mon, Loverboy, it’s your round at the bar.” Remus rolled his eyes at his best friend, leaning against the bar and flagging down the barman.

“S’about time I bought you a drink, don’t you think?” he said.

“I’d reckon so, especially with the amount of drinks I make you every time I see you.” Y/N laughed.

“Wow. I’m sorry I make you do your job.” Remus joked, reaching into his pocket to retrieve his wallet. He thumbed through it, slipping out a note and handing it to the barman. It was when he was putting his change back that he noticed that something was out of place. The polaroid he had of Y/N had moved. Remus frowned as he pulled it out, ready to move it back to where it was before. His expression darkened as he realised that the photographs had been swapped.

“Sirius! What the fuck is this!” He whipped round to look at him, the polaroid gripped between his fingers. Sirius had a mischievous smile on his face and Lily and James looked at each other sheepishly.

“S’just a picture of me, you know, thought it’d be funny.” Sirius shrugged.

“Well, it’s not. Where’s the picture of Y/N?” Remus questioned, he had a face like thunder. Y/N stood awkwardly next to them, not really knowing what to do.

“In my wallet somewhere,” he said, “calm down, Loverboy, you can have it back.”

“Stop calling me that.” Remus wasn’t sure what came over him but before he knew it, he had Sirius pinned against a wall, his hands latched onto the collar of his shirt.

“Remus what the fuck!” Sirius exclaimed, trying to shove the taller boy off of him, “the fuck has gotten into you?”

“You know I don’t like people messing with my fucking stuff.” He hissed, his face practically touching Sirius’.

“Woah, woah, woah.” James strode over to them, placing a hand on Remus’s back, “calm down, Moony, he was only having a joke.”

“I don’t care if he was having a joke or not,” Remus exclaimed, “He knows full well that I don’t like people touching what’s mine.”

Remus was known in the group for having a short temper. He was like a ticking time bomb and his friends knew that. Most of the time he was fine, but he was awfully possessive over his friends and his belongings.

“It’s here, look!” Sirius shouted, fishing the polaroid of Y/N out of his pocket and waving it in Remus’ face, “I don’t know what the fuck has gotten into you, but you’ve been a completely different person since you started fancying her.”

For the second time that night, Remus seemed to lose all control over his body as he roughly shoved Sirius to the floor, snatching the photograph off of him and putting it back into his wallet. He grabbed Y/N by the arm and pulled her along with him as he walked off.

The cool night air hit them as they stepped outside, Y/N’s heart was racing at the scene that had just happened inside and she felt at a loss for words. She couldn’t decide whether to say something to Remus or not, or if it would just make things worse. He was holding on firming to her hand as he dragged her through crowds of people and through the large metal doors leading to outside. Remus stopped when they got into the carpark, leaning against the wall with his arms folded over his chest.

“I’m sorry about that.” he apologised, taking the cigarette that he had tucked behind his ear and lighting it before placing it in his mouth, “It’s just, Sirius really knows how to get under my skin sometimes.”

“It’s fine.” Y/N mustered up an awkward smile, “I get it. That’s what friends are for, right?”

Remus laughed, taking a drag of his cigarette and smiling. He placed his hands on Y/N’s hips, pulling her closer towards him. She was standing opposite him and he was looking intently into her eyes. He frenched out the smoke from his cigarette, angling it away from her face as he chuckled.

“It’s just... you’re different, you know?” his usual smug look had been wiped from his face as he looked at her. Even leaning against the wall, he seemed to tower over her. “I’ve never felt like this about a girl before.”

“How’d you mean?” Y/N looked at him quizzically, “I know for a fact that you get any girl that you want.”

Remus let out a laugh, taking another drag of his cigarette. He wrapped an arm around Y/N’s shoulder, pulling her into him. She could smell the leather from his jacket mixing with the smokey smell of his cigarettes and the warm musk of his aftershave. It was making her feel lightheaded as she leaned into him.

“I feel the same about you.” she looked up at him, a grin forming on her lips, “you annoy the absolute shit out of me, but something about you makes me keep coming back for more.” Remus grinned in response, his infamous shit-eating grin back on his face.

“Oh, yeah?"

#remus lupin x reader #remus lupin fanfiction #remus lupin fluff #remus lupin x you #remus lupin imagine #remus lupin #marauders #marauders fic #marauders era

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