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#im so sorry i promise ill draw him normal next time
chkn-kit · 3 months
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sometimes i think about how other people enjoy seeing their favorite characters being cool or happy whilst im over here covering my favorite characters in blood
anyway im working on valentines day art w kaeya 😭
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Recovering Your Catfish: Changes
Summary- 1.6k Francisco “Catfish” Morales x Reader. Being back home after the ill fated trip trying to cross the Andes has left your Frankie a different man. While he deals with the trauma, you are there to remind him he still has you. Thick and thin, you are with him the entire way. 
Warnings- None except uncomfortable flashbacks. 
A/N- this was just an indulgence @babiiface95​ has dragged me into for this man. I have no idea how accurate any of this will be, its pure just my fantasy with it. Also I have no clue why, but I see him living in Louisiana, so again I self indulged and that’s where home is for him. 
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“We’re not dropping the money! Push it, it can go over that ridge.” 
“Fuck off Tom, you cant get this thing over it without blowing one of the engines.” 
“Get it done.” Tom grunted at him and Frank pushed the lever, making the Mil Mi-8 helicopter shake and rattle. Then it popped, the levers on the dash spinning out of control. They pushed it too hard. 
They were going down. 
“Frankie! Frankie wake up.” Gentle hands cupped his face and his eyes sprang open to a moonlit dim room filled with the rattling sound of an old AC unit trying its best to combat the midsummer bayou heat and failing miserably. Beads of sweat rolled down his face, but all he could feel was the permanent deep chill of the Andes that was forever ingrained in Franks memory. “Its a dream baby, your home.” 
“Fuck Y/N, I’m sorry.” He groaned, his hand raising to cover his eyes as he came back to the present. 
“It's okay. You were just mumbling in your sleep.” You smile softly and your touch turns to one that smooths along his cheek, and drops to gentle strokes to the side of his neck and rubbing his earlobes, feeling him start to relax now that he is awake again. In this lighting his brown eyes seemed almost black as he stared up at the ceiling, inhaling through his nose and exhaling through his mouth. You settle back down next to him, dropping your hand to the center of his chest, which he covers with his own to clutch at it, like he was afraid you were going to let it go. “Do you want to tell me about it?” You offer him, sometimes Frank would share his dream, other times he wouldn't. 
“It was just when our engine blew. If I just had one of them cut that load, we would have made it over that ridge. Tom was so stubborn. Wanted the whole load. I knew it wouldn't make it… but I just kept following orders.” He admitted softly while you shifted in closer regardless of the stifling humidity. 
“All the men heard you Frankie, any of them could have dropped the load . Its not just on you, you warned Tom.” You reminded him softly, knowing he would continue shouldering the blame because he was the pilot. 
Frankie hummed to agree with you, but you knew it was simply to appease you for now. His head tilted to press a kiss against the top of your head. 
You sat outside of the therapist office, the windows rolled down and was sure to park in the shade, occasionally you would sip from your water bottle, waiting. Franks sessions usually ran 45 minutes to an hour and you worked it out so that you were here for him afterwards, he never liked being all alone after them, said that all the thoughts would get overwhelming. You were happy to do this for him and were incredibly proud of how far he had come from when he came home. 
You waited in the little office at Gerald’s Airstrip where Frank worked on and off since retiring from working Delta Force. The man who left on some “secret mission” he wouldn't tell you much about had been hopeful, promising life was changing for the two of you when he returned. 
How right he was. 
When the small plane landed and the door opened, you made your way out of the office. The first off the plane was the youthful face of Benny followed closely by Will, which you smiled and hugged them both tightly as they made their way off the steps. “Im so sorry” You whispered to each of them, a rub to their backs and a step back. “I'm so glad you are home though.” 
“We are to Y/N.” Ben went in for a quick hug once more and you embraced him once more before separating. The two of them splitting from you and you turned back towards the plane to see Frank making his way carefully down the steps and that's when you felt overwhelming relief. Giving a gentle sob, you rushed the last few feet and vaulted at him, hugging him tightly which he welcomed. 
He squeezed you into him and buried his face in your neck just as you did, your fingers clutching at the back of his shirt, taking a shuddering breath, just holding one another for a few moments till you pulled your head up, nuzzling against his ear. “Thank you for making it home Frankie.” “I missed you so much Mon Cherie.” he matched your grasp, like he couldn't lose you, couldn't hold you tight enough to him. Truth be told, after the time he left till he returned home had brought back so many memories of his Delta Force days that you wanted to put it all behind you. For good. No more secret missions, no more worrying if he wasn't going to make it home. Easing back enough to look at him, his hands falling to your hips as you cupped his face in your hands, your thumbs brushing along the smoothness of freshly shaven cheeks. 
“You ready to go home Catfish?” you say his nickname with affection and he nods, his brown eyes softening the way warm chocolate would turn when melted. 
“More then anything please.” 
The therapist’s office door opened and you saw Frank drop his baseball cap lower over his eyes to block some of the midday glare as he made his way across the parking lot where you were parked. You turn the car on and ease out to meet him halfway, which he slipped into the passenger side next to you, going to buckle up. 
You never ask him how it went, Frank needed time to process his own thoughts before he was one to share, you knew he would come to you with it probably over coffee the next day or middle of the night when he couldn’t sleep, the dark making it easier to face himself. Instead you treated it like it was a normal day. “I got to stop Breaux Mart for some groceries, want me to drop you off at home?” 
“Nah, I will come with you. We can stop at the fish mart on the way home, on me.” He offered and you nodded with a grin.
“Deal.” 
The market was not too busy, midweek usually wasn't close enough to the weekend for the crowds, which is why you worked your shopping time now along with his therapy sessions. It was all a part of Frank not wanting to be alone afterwards, but did not want to be in the overwhelming presence of people trying to go about there everyday lives, always in a hurry. 
Just like he had hurried through the jungle with his rifle against his shoulder, his heart pounding in his ears as he followed behind his team, spinning on his heels to be sure they were not being followed. The rain was drowning all sound, meaning he had to rely on sight alone. 
Hurry hurry hurry while loading the vehicle. 
His hand shot out and grasped your thigh, overwhelmed searing his chest. You didn't flinch at his sudden movement, just dropped your hand from the steering wheel while waiting at a red light and covered his. 
He didn't have to hurry now, didn't have to have orders screamed at him that it was life and death, they gotta move faster to get out of there. Never again, he was home. 
With you. 
He glanced at you to see you biting at the bottom of your lip as you maneuvered the truck through traffic to the supermarket you preferred to use. Letting go of his hand to use both hands on the wheel when turning. 
“I was thinking about making a lemon layer cake for this weekend.” You kept up an idle conversation, glancing at him. “So don't let me forget the lemons.” 
“No Ma’am, I won’t.” he promised as they both left the truck. Frank grabbed a cart on the way in, and you pulled out your list, steering him towards the vegetable section to start. You picked through leafy greens, picking up bundles and giving a slight shake to lose the excess water before slipping them into a baggie and setting them in the cart. The drizzle of water shot off near Frank making him wince when he felt the spray settle on his skin, closing his eyes to push the memory of rain water drenching him till his clothes clung to him in a suffocating way, heavier from all the rain while running. Even drinking water made him cringe now, remembering the saltier mix of sweat and blood streaming down his face unable to escape the taste of it with fresh rainwater. 
Suddenly he felt your hand slide against his on the cart, pulling his hand into his and giving a squeeze, leading you two away from the spray of the water, towards other vegetables. Somehow you always knew when he needed to be brought back to the here and now. Lifting your hand, he pressed his lips to the back of your hand in a silent thank you while you dropped in a few ears of corn. 
“We can do a boil this weekend if you are up for it.” You draw him back into the here and now. Fuck how did he get lucky to have you. 
“You know I'm never gonna say no to that. We got the seasoning?” he questioned and you give him a light push, laughing. 
“It would be a sin if I didn't have it on hand permanently.” You winked while grabbing other ingredients to use. Approaching the lemons, Frank pauses while grabbing a bag of fresh lemons and you reach to grasp one lightly through the netting, bringing it to your nose to inhale the fresh citrus scent. 
“Just what I needed, thank you.” 
“Anytime Mon Cherie.” 
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spideyanakin · 4 years
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Across The Stars - P1
Will Turner x Sparrow!Reader
Synopsis; You seem to always found yourself across the stars from the one you love
Series Masterlist 🍒
Normal Masterlist 🧚🏻
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"Will!" You spat some water out as it was getting hard for your little arms to take the pressure of the waves crashing into you. "Will, help- me-" you tried to call out for your best friend but water caught your lungs as you tried to hand on to the nearest piece of wood.
You looked around as you hanged on to it as hard as you could, the smoke from your sunk ship blinding you. You took a second to get your breath back, but the effort caught you, making you fall asleep on your small plank of wood, drifting away, far across the stars from the ship that little Will’s piece of wood had taken him.
and that’s the first time you were separated.
You see, when your father had been mutinied off his ship and placed on a small island, bootstrap had send you off with his son, by fear of what Borbossa would do to you.
But today wasn’t your luck as the black pearl caught up with your ship, leaving you alone. After that your new found luck made you drift right into that trading ship who had rescued your father after his mutiny.
From this moment you were bound to sail the seas with your father, far across the stars from Will.
~
Years later you had found yourself entering a tavern at Port Royal. The sweet smell of rhum sending a wave of discust to your stomach as the smell hunted you all your childhood.
You looked around the room, cursing at your dear old dad for dropping you off here, with his intentions of picking you up after his "quest" for a crew and better ship.
You ordered your drink, keeping an eye around you and a tight grip on your sword making sure no man’s bad attention would get in the way of your short stay.
Just as the bar tender was handing you your drink you felt a man’s hand on your shoulder, and whistles coming from behind.
"What’s a gal like you doing in pants like these." He asked as you turned around his stare shifting from your butt to your eyes.
"Excuse me?" Your tone was sharp and aggressive.
"Oh come one. You don’t expect walking in here like this and not get a little something in return?" He smiled as he took a step towards you taking a hold of your arm.
"Hey lad I think the lady doesn’t you near he-" a man about your age came at your rescue just as you got your sword out at the man who was bothering you.
"Wow hey." The man stepped back as the one who failed his rescue mission chuckled to himself, taking a place at the bar near you when the man left.
"It’s a good sword." He remarked.
"Excuse me?" You chuckeld these two words being way softer then the previous time you’d said them.
"I said it’s a good sword. And I should know, Thats what I do for a living." He pointed out the sword you were placing back on your hip. "Suits you" He pointed out to your whole pirate look.
"Well thank you." You raised an eyebrow and took a sip of your drink. "Um... Have we met before?" You slightly turned your head thinking you’d already seen those traits on someone.
"I don’t think we have." He smiled. "I think I’d remember you. You see... I’m not usually the friendliest with pirates" He pointed it out which made you place a hand on your hip trying to sass him out of the fact that you were indeed, a pirate "but, I’m Will." He stretched his arm out for you to shake it which you stared out for a little while before replying.
"Y/n." You shook it back. "I use to know someone named Will." You gave him a sad smile "But what made you so sure of my origins?" You questioned.
He laughed to himself before replying.
"Well for starters, the sword, the hat, the pants, the corset, and the necklace." He pointed out to the cursed astect gold resting on your neck.
"Good at noticing things. I like that." You winked as you took another sip. "Now your a swordsmith right?" You asked.
He nodded.
"M’y dagger..." you grabbed it from the back of your boot. "Needs a little freshen up." You chuckled knowingly as you got out the chipped and used dagger. "Could you be it’s savoir lass?" You questioned biting your lip in the process.
"I think I can."
Since that day you’d beg your father to drop you at Port Royal. Pretending you’d chipped your sword and coming all dramatic towards Will for help. That little serenade went on for a few months until you’d both finally decided to do something about it. Will had made the first move, the first kiss. Making the romance that had bloomed even stronger.
"Excuse me lass, I’d like to know how my sword is going.” You walking into Will’s shop, the owner drunk and asleep not noticing you came in. You sat down on Will's working space.
“How are you love?” He asked as he pressed a kiss to your knuckled before dropping the pencil in his hand.
“Good.” You smiled. “Who’s it for?” You asked as you scanned the detailed drawing of the sword. 
“Governer Swann. He gave me this sword as an exemple” Will grabbed the sword in question. “Comes from London apparently. He wanted around the same thing but I have to say im not a fan.” He scrunched his face before dropping the sword. “I tried making my version better, I guess. Definitly not my best work.” He replied before making grabby hands towards you showing you to sit on his lap. 
You did as he wished and pressed a few kissess to his lips, making all worries slipping away from his mind.
“Definitely not as beautiful as mine.” You smiled as you kissed him again. 
“Your is definitely my best work so far. And im not kidding.” He smiled. 
For a few seconds silence fell in the room and Will’s eyes shifted to the golden coin you wore so preciously on your neck.
"You never told me why you always wear that." He smiled, brushing it with the tip of his fingers.
"Well a pirate who rescued me gave it to me. When my father got mutinied off his ship, well one of his crew members wasn’t too happy about it and knew Barbossa; the pirate who basically left me an orphan, would want to hurt me. So Bootstraps; the nice pirate sent me away with his son and handed both of us two golden coins, telling us we had to protect it no matter what. So I never took mine off." You sighed at the memory, and Will could sense the sadness in your tone as you spoke of it.
"And his son? You still know him?" He raised an eyebrow and a grin lit your face up
"Someone’s jalouse arnt they?" You smiled. "No. The ship we fleeted on got attacked by the black pearl itself a few weeks after..." you looked down. "I managed to survive but I don’t know about him." You gave him a sad smile as Will rubbed circles on your back.
"Oh, I’m sorry." He looked down.
"It’s alright." You lifted his face so he could meet your eyes. "I have you now. The only best friend I need." You kissed his nose and a bright smile painted his face. “How’s my sword going by the way?” 
“Very well. It’s on the fire at the moment so I can’t show it to you, but next time you come it will be ready as promised.” Your eyes lit up at his words.
“Talking about next times, I have to go. Promised my father i’d be quick.” You pouted and Will’s grip tightened on you. 
“I promise im coming back in less then a week!” you exclaimed.
“But I haven’t seen you in two.” He pouted and placed his head on your shoulder. 
“I know but I promised him ill be back on port in twenty minutes and im going to be late.” You chuckled. “You know my dad. He wanted to make sure the new ship the governor is building didn’t get delayed.” You chuckled.
“He wants to steal it righht.”
“Sadly yes.” You laughed. “And I told him I wasn’t helping. So that means I can spend all that time with you.” You smiled and he did too. 
“Alright... I’ll let you go.” He smiled as you climbed off his lap. “See you in a week” 
“See ya my love.”
-Tag List- 
@averyfosterthoughts @slytherinambitious​ @ourfavoritesergeantbarnes
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urlocalbunny · 4 years
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Ok angst time... Headcanons for if the baby was lost half way thou... ( im SO sorry )
Aaron:
the way of guessing your feelings through his nose was just terrible right now. He could see you were disraught. broken. in pain. when your hands, weak, reached out for him for a hug sometimes, it felt like you’d break and drift away if he didn’t hold you together. His eyes were almost always watery for a few weeks.
he’d be silent. distant from the other things he loved for a while. if he ever talked, was to reassure you you’d work this out. He’d cry very often when you slept. Your face was sad even when you were many hours in.
He’d have taken down the room carefully after a while, but when he opened the door, he saw you holding the little deer plushie you put in the bed. you held your now back to normal belly, and you’d apologize to your baby and to him many times. He was shocked to know you thougth that was your fault to begin with. 
he was absolutely heartbroken to the point where Beliath would always wear a sad frown every time they were in the same room. The vampires would comfort him, but nothing seemed to move when you were so sad. Your kid was going to be the bravest person he ever met. he was sure. They must have had a big fight before the end. 
Seeing him not leaving through night and day made you wonder how it was possible when you failed. one day, however, you heard a howl on your window. it was a full moon, so whatever you thought you were doing, Aaron would not approve. But you opened the window. He was there, but there was nothing but disconnected toughts. That was the wolf.
He was standing in an elegant stance. He was quietly looking at her in the eyes. “How did you get in here? This is really high!” You asked, still wary until you felt soft fur on your belly. He had his eyes closed, you could feel when your hands held his head on instinct. He still thought of nothing. Your arms circled his head. instead of feeling sad, a spark of joy bloomed in you. There were no parts in your beloved that hated you, even the ones he didn’t control. He jumped up and down, shaking his head and jumping on the floor, calling you to run with him. You ran out of the manor under the boys’ curious gazes and you ran. He circled around you, slowing down to match your pace. Your joyful laugh reached every pair of ears in the manor.
Raphael:
In times like these, he wished he could draw. But he also felt completely good being blind for the first time in his life. ,
Your screams full of horror, Ethan’s despair in the air and the smell of blood stained his mind. He closed his eyes in a silent plead. “If something miraculous happens and I recover, do not let me see.” 
You were quiet in the next few days. He waited for you to talk, but you’d open your mouth and try to say something, but your breath was ragged, as if you were suffocating. He felt your gaze on him the whole time.
one day, even if it took all of his strength, he sat on your side and tought of words. But they also wouldn’t do. The best, most beautiful thing he could ever say was something his friend Aaron would. With no shortcuts, but with no curves either.
“Do you, perhaps, think this is your fault?” his tone was stern, but you had to get a earful. “The way you don’t answer me is honestly worrisome. You have to stop thinking about me right now if you ever want to make amends with yourself. The reason why i was so happy was because i love you with all my might. I woudl not have it like this with anybody else.” your arms circled his waist. This time, he caught you. 
Your cries were, this time, full of relief. He hummed a song to you. It was a happy lullaby. his lips were faintly on your temple. You would get through this.
Beliath:
Your baby’s presence was the first thing he missed this morning. you were crying in disbelief. 
He didn’t even remember shoving Ethan into the room, but he did. His hand went to his head and he breathed in and out. He has never grieved before. Never.
When Ethan left, he held your hand and face. “Don’t you think about saying you’re sorry.” your eyes widened. “I’m not leaving your side.”
He did what he said. He was heartbroken in ways he’s never experienced before without you, but he would manage for you. For the both of you.
The months run cold and slow without your heart-warming shrieks when you saw tiny gloves and hats or when you finished putting up the crib, but your face looks a little more colorful again. 
He haven’t partied in months and he doesn’t want to, but he comes up with a small and calm gathering of people you both know and cherish. You smile when you see how different it is from the usual. When you accept his hand and swing slowly into the song he let Vladimir of all people choose, he lets out a sigh he didn’t know he was holding.
He could finally see your face without the fog again. You didn’t stop smiling. He shed a tear that you caught in your hands.
Vladimir.
It was his fault. He was sure for months. Maybe because he wasn’t good to you? Loving enough? Supportive enough? He was devastated. But the feeling that lingered was because he was ill. He was weak and he passed this to your baby. Your precious baby was dead, and it was him.
When he shared this with you, he expected everything but you raising your hand to slap him and then turning around to stop yourself. He put a hand on his face in shock even if you didn’t hit him. Was he that repulsive to you?
You grabbed his hands like he was a tiny kid, and proceeded to scold him for thinking it was his fault. You said you’ve never seen somebody talk such bullshit and he had to keep himself in check. That was harsh, but he realized you were telling the truth and that’s what hurt the most.
He had to man up and help you overcome this. No more temper trantrums, no more talking ill of himself when it came to the baby. That was disrespectful. How to cheer you up? How to make you realize you’re more than this situation? 
He took you to the garden one day. You didn’t understand at first, but he put a seed on your hand. a cyclamen. Your eyes looked for his, but he was hiding his blush.
“My mother taught me how to do this. I think we should do it together from now on, since she can not teach you mother to mother...” 
Your sudden hug was strong. Your tears were warm on the crook of his neck. But your smile was what made him tear up too. Finally. Finally, you were coming back home.
Ethan: 
Your wet hand full of blood woke him up. He was in shock when he realized you baby was gone. Just when he started to lose the fear. Just when he started to have wishful thinking every single hour of the day. It was just his luck, to see your horrified face, to see you asking if your baby wouldn’t open their eyes. 
He did everything in his power to make your body recover, but the thing he worried the most about was your heart. His hugs lingered, his face scrunched up but he didn’t cry. There was no way he could ever make you overcome this. He was useless.
Beliath knocked some sense in his head after he tried to give you some space one day. He was drinking like crazy and Beliath knocked his cup off. He said he had to be by your side. To stop worrying about himself because it didn’t matter how useless he tough he was, you loved him and he was the only one you had right now.
The other night, he opened the door to his room with you, hand-in-hand. You both sat down and he looked into your eyes after a long time. “I felt guilty and ashamed of me. I’m sorry for not being able to help you as much as I could but I promise I’m never leaving you alone to bear with it again. This is our baby. We will get through this together or we won’t overcome this at all.”
The kiss you shared was salty and soft. He realized you didn’t kiss in a long time. But he was about to change that. He was going to cherish you, and live. Live to show you how much he loved you and your baby, no matter what happened in his past.
Ivan:
Surprisingly, one of the most serious on how he’d deal with it. He’d lost everything once and he was not surprised. He cared about you. 
He would get whatever you needed. You’d be able to vent to him and he wouldn’t show how heartbroken he was, but you knew he’d cry at night.
The both of you would be steady on helping each other out and supporting yourselves. You’re both young and this is taking a toll on you.
The vampires wouold help you out and take you guys places, undo the room for you when you’re ready. 
Aaron is also in need of care. He was going to be the godfather... He’s going to be your biggest supporter.
Ivan would actually encourage you to go see the doctors. Even if it was dangerous, you’d find out what was the problem and you could always pretend. You’ feel reassured, and squeeze his hand. Your sweet I love you was all he needed to be sure of your recovery. You’d be fine as long as you were together.
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My last Nsfw for awhile.
A commissioned Fic .
Summary. Hero Killer Stain finds a hell hound Reader who is hard to control and takes her in .
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“Easy..easy…” Stain whispered to you , reaching out to pet your head. “I know it hurts but - ow.” He chuckled looking at his arm in your mouth .
You had gotten hurt tonight during a purge , running straight for the hero without thinking, without hearing Chizome yelling for you to stop. The Hero got you on your side leaving a gash , you stumbled to the ground growling clutching the cut , blood seeping through your fingers . Chizome groaned jumping down from the building he was perched on landing on the Hero stabbing him in the throat
Chizome glanced up at your struggling body, tail going nuts setting everything on fire around you , smoke started to gather and Chizome pulled his sword free getting up walking towards you . You snarled up at him swinging your claws at him. Chizome crouched down putting his hand on your head, slowly you fought him , pushing at his chest biting him all over , “rrr!!!!! Raaaarr…!!!!!!!!” You headbutted his chest and Chizome let go of you standing up. He needed to get you home before you bled out . You got on all fours ready to pounce on him .
“Serra, Knock.It.Off.”
“RRRRrrr!!!!”
“Serrano.” He snapped his fingers watching your ears twitch and fall down, the flames dwindling.
Your legs got numb from being hunched over and gave out under you , your tail was still bright and fully formed and the fire was getting closer to you both. “Serra, come here.”
“RRRR...rrrr…”
“Now.”
It took you a very long few minutes to crawl to him , fire ears fully down , tail the size of an actual tail now instead of a big long fire. He wrapped his arms around you placing a hand over the cut . “There we go…” he petted you pulling you into his arms . “Lets get you patched up Serra.” He jumped up a fire escape onto a building running along it, heading home.
••
Chizome scratched your head watching the blood creep out from his arm , he continued to scratch watching it slowly take over you. Your eyes got heavy and your jaws retracted to regular teeth. Your ears and tail vanished and you fell into his lap whimpering. “I know.” He told you, still scratching . “Focus on me Serra, not the pain. It will be better soon.”
You dug your face into his lap whimpering more and more while Chizome lifted up your bloody shirt to look at the cut . It was directly down your side under your breast to your hip . He wrapped you up in a bandage doubling it up and pulling the shirt off you . “Stay here, ill get you a new shirt”. Chizome started to get uo but you had your arms around him, he tipped your chin up to see your face full of tears .
“Serra…”
“Ss...oor...ee..”
“I know you're sorry Serra, but you can't run off like that so recklessly when we don't know what the quirk is. “
You hung your head in shame leaning into his chest , resting your head on his shoulder.
“Since you're genuinely sorry i won't punish you so hard , but tonight you can't sleep in my bed.” He kisses your head picking you up so he could get up and set you down on the floor.
“Chi..”
“Ill be right back.” He waved going into his room.
Whimpering you crawled over to your makeshift bed that consisted of an old circle dog bed that you sunk into, a few heavy blankets and a pillow that said Angels Rest Here. It was full of teeth marks and holes. Quietly you gnawed on the pillow , waiting.
Chizome looked at the shirt in his hand thinking. He had a good hold on you but sometimes your quirk took over and you couldn't do anything about it. What could he do? He threw the shirt over his shoulder leaving his room and making a stop in the kitchen opening up a jar to grab something.
“Serra.” He said softly , returning to you.
Looking up your nose twitched and you dropped the pillow , mouth watering. “Sin..” you sat up whimpering.
Chizome put the shirt on you and held out a long cinnamon stick to you. You wiped your face and chomped down on the stick , your tail and ears popping out , wagging a mile a minute.
Chizome sat down with you pulling you between his arms looking at your tail while you ate the spicy stick. He grabbed hold of your tail not feeling any heat . “Serra, can you control the temperature ?”
You looked back , mouth full of crumbs making him smile , he wiped your face with his thumb . “Serra make this tail hot.”
You hopped away from Chizome sitting facing him tilting your head . Your tail was regular size right now, little flames falling off it disappearing. You looked back at the tail and it flicked getting bigger , a small heat coming from it now. Slowly your tiny claws crept out scratching the old wood floor.
“Hotter.”
The tail stretched over your head and Chizome could feel himself sweating. “Serra.”
No answer.
“Hotter.”
“RRR...rrr…” the tail started to burst sending fire to the floor catching it.
“Serra.”
“rrrrRRRRR” you lunged towards him and Chizome fell back catching you holding your arms down. “So it's the .. tail..”
You struggled against him and Chizome rolled to his feet stumbling into the wall trying to keep you secure. You screamed, swinging your tail everywhere, knocking things down and burning Chizome.
“AUYGH!!!”
“Serra!!!” He rubbed your arm with his thumb slowly walking towards the kitchen . “It's okay.. i know now.”
“AAUUGH RRR”
“The tail, the bigger it gets..” he slammed into a cabinet opening it up. “The faster you lose control.. but..” He grabbed a small tin sliding down to the floor prying your mouth open. “Maybe this can help..” He dumped Altoids into your mouth, shutting it and squeezing you.
Cold, you were cold . What is this? You looked down to see little bumps on your arms , your mouth felt like you swallowed a snowball. You gulped down the mints gasping, slowly calming down, shivering. The tail shrunk to normal size and the fires on the floor went out .
“...Chi...”
“Im here.” He heaved squeezing you.
In a flash you looked back at him and your ears fell. He was burned on the face and his neck. “Chi is here” His heavy hand fell on your hand. Your ears popping out between his fingers .
“Im okay. We know now..”
“Chi!!!”
“Sshh…” gently he turned you to him kissing your forehead. “Calm down Serra, I'm okay. Right now I want you to focus on me.”
You whimpered hugging him tightly, sobbing loudly as Chizome held you with burned arms , lightly he rubbed at your back trying to sooth you. “Good girl… such a good girl..”
••
The next couple days Chizome did not go out, instead he spent his time training you, helping you get a hold on your quirk. You lost control a few times and ended up biting Chizome a few times but he didn't mind. He never yelled at you but he did firmly punish you. Usually he would put you on the leash and tie you up to the table while he went out without you.
When he came home he was always bloody and dirty. You would pull on the leash till Chizome unhooked it and you would run around his legs rubbing on him saying ‘Chi Home.’
“Yes yes, and your punishment is over so come spend time with Chi while he makes dinner. I even got you something!”
Your eyes got wide and your quirk popped out in excitement . He pulled a bone out of his pocket holding it out for you, tail wagging you sniffed up at it making a gross face.
“..no?”
“Rr…”
He brought the bone back up setting it on the counter. “Hmm… “ He glanced down at you seeing your tail flick around. “I'll think of something.”
“Rr….”
“I promise.” Gently he pet your head and turned his attention back to the dinner.
••
At the table Chizome was feeding you some blood stake from his fork. Petting you every time you took a bite. “Good girl.” He fed you more , offering you water between bites . When you were satisfied you nuzzled into his thigh and crawled to your bed to sleep, tail swaying.
Chizome watched you while he ate his food. Things were getting better , but he wanted to test it.
The next night you finally got to go out with him again. It had been so long for you the rush you felt chasing Chizome on the rooftops was enough to make your tail grow bigger and bigger. Chizome stopped on a red roof looking back at you, his long bandages flowing in the night sky. You stopped next to him panting, tail flicking.
“Chi…”
He gave you a mint watching your tail shrink a bit . Slowly you felt more control over your quirk , your vision was clearing and your senses heightened.
“There we go.” He put his hand on your head crouching down next to you, his tongue slipping out of his mouth. “Lets see what you can do, Serra.”
You barked and your ears pointed straight up, you jumped off the building sliding down the fire escape down to the ground landing on all four.
The Heroes flinched watching you getting ready to fight , your tail stood straight up when you charged towards them grabbing on by the leg , your tail grabbing hold of the other hero by the waist sending him flying . You bit into the heroes leg crushing it causing him to fall , he grabbed your neck and you dug your claws into his arm deeply drawing blood . A crack could be heard along with a scream .
The arm fell to your feet and the hero screamed his lungs out , the last thing he saw was your happy face lunging towards him till everything went black .
Chizome walked over to you glancing at the hero who was in pieces and the other who was bended backwards against a lightpost . He crouched down next to you looking very pleased.
You panted glancing over to see his proud face. He patted your head and scratched your chin fast. “Good girl!!!!!” Your tail wagged and you yipped all excited. “Oh yes my good girl, my good little fire pup!!!” He scratched your chin more and picked you up hugging you. “So so so good!!!! You did it yes you did !!! I think someone deserves a treat!!!”
You yipped again, licking his face all over while Chizome brought you home.
••
Back at home you were sitting on Chizomes lap in your panties and underwear peppering kisses all over his face . Chizome was in his boxers grinding up into your clothed folds. “Your such a good girl for me..” he said softly into your ear . You yipped wagging your tail fast and lightly nipping at his neck.
Chizome slipped your panties off and rubbed the head of his cock against your slick slit smirking . “So wet already , just for her master .” He teased pushing into you . You giggled sliding down on his cock till you were sitting comfortably .
“Chi..”
“Hm? Yes Serra?”
You started to move up and down on his cock , your breast bouncing lightly .
“Oh you little fussy pup.” He kissed your cheek laying back, hands behind his head. “You want to please your master huh? Go ahead Serra.”
Your cheeks flushed read as you humped his cock in a steady pace , whimpering from how good he felt against your walls squeezing you just right. Slowly you got faster, louder , your tail flicking all around as you leaned forward putting your hands on his chest to balance .
Chizome held your hips, praising you the whole time you rode his cock. ‘Good girl’ ‘Your doing great’ he told you over and over while he watched you .
“Chi…” you lifted your arms up to bounce faster , chasing your release.
“Oh Serra you feel so good yes you do.” He squeezed your hips and lifted one hand to grab your collar pulling you down , the little fish tag on it jingling all around. He kissed your lips thrusting hard .
Whimpers fell from your mouth as you sped up, your ears dropping . Chizome kissed your forehead talking low. “Go ahead fire pup, cum on your master cock .”
You fell into him cumming hard, feeling it crash down on your trembling body . Chizome grunted cumming too deep inside you . “Ohh.. good girl..” he pulled you into his arms slowly sliding out of you. Lightly he pet you to calm you down . “Sshh.. guess what Serra?”
You looked up, face red and fangs growing and shrinking with each pant leaving your mouth. “Stay here, master has a treat for you.” He kissed your lips, setting you on the bed.
You snuggled his pillow gnawing on it, watching him go to the kitchen. “Rr..”
“Shh..” he looked back after opening a cabinet . “I'm coming back.” He grabbed something and made his way back to you . “Here, open it.”
It was a little bag he placed in your hands. Tilting your head at it you bit into the bag ripping it . The bone fell out but it smelled… good. You leaned down sniffing it to see little red spots all over it. Lightly you licked at the bone and your tail spiked .
“I really wanted to give you that bone fire pup, but you didn't like it.” He told you as you crawled into his arms gnawing the bone. “So I cut up some peppers and placed it in a bowl full of chunks .” You gnawed more, tail wagging. “Pepper bones, “ he kissed your head snuggling you close, smiling warmly.
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little-bard · 4 years
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So I have this idea for gender fluid in the witcher universe. So humor me if you will.
So I’ve seen the idea floated around the community how there could easily be trans people because they could just do the same thing as Yennefer. But obviously, you give up fertility to live in the body you should have been born with. I was thinking traditional non-binary could do it to appear more androgynous if that’s what they wanted as well. But then I started thinking of myself. I’m technically non-binary but I’m gender fluid. And sometimes I want to present highly masc but can’t because of my body but I would also be depressed if I couldn’t present femme anymore on the days where I felt that way.
So here’s my fantasy solution. You can go through the same spell but it’s ever-changing. Whereas Yen’s is a permanent appearance change this is one that changes with your true inner self. You obviously give up being fertile but I’m not sure if it would require more yet. It would obviously mean no casual sex as you don’t want the man you just bedded as a woman to wake up next to a man. Or reverse. And it would be hard to maintain friends because you could have two lives almost but once you maneuver telling the people you’re close to I think it would kinda be like a superpower? Like you can be a wanted criminal as a man and a queen as a woman. I also don’t imagine there being a lot of people who would be gender fluid in the universe. So it’s odd and many people don’t even know it exists. I think I would write a binary gender-fluid character with male and female. But they could be any genders. And it’s not like shapeshifting (I mean kinda but also no?) like strictly still their race and usually still similar looking.
I kinda have an original character in mind, obviously friends with Jaskier because I feel like the little bard draws special people to him. Maybe an Ex-lover? No definitely because Jaskier is bi/pan as heck and being able to love one person who’s both man and women and amazing and sweet. And ATTRACTIVE that’s amazing! Also, this person probably felt the most comfortable letting their pent up sexual energy out with the man Because let’s be honest, Jaskier is a sweetheart and treats them exactly the same no matter if they feel like a different gender in the morning. (Also they’re both huge sluts and enjoy the same things sexually.) And that’s exactly what they needed, someone who cared about them and understand they were one person, just someone who experienced 2 genders and needed to be both to be happy and fulfilled. But they realized they weren’t right for each other and remained best friends.
I imagine them meeting the gang in a female form. Short and curvy, long flowing wavy brown hair a beautiful dress and a soft almost doll-like face all tied together by their piercing green eyes. Jaskier sees them at a random event at court and invites them to travel with the crew to the next town as they’re all heading that way. At first, they’re weary but they agree, as it’s Jaskier there’s no way he would travel with anyone unaccepting of who they were.
Geralt is almost jealous when they arrive to begin the journey with their own horse (a bigger bag too. Normally one person didn’t need that much) and even lets Jaskier ride with them. Jaskier begins playing his lute and singing a song that Geralt isn’t familiar with but they certainly are, as they sing along to his song bird-like voice with a soft and beautiful voice of their own. At camp later too, the two were inseparable. Geralt tried to not stare at them. Jaskier had always been a flirt and could get any person in bed if he wanted to. But it was the familiar feeling between the two that put Geralt on edge. Nobody but him was supposed to those soft smiles on Jaskiers lip or having Jaskier sing them songs only they knew. Geralt felt the Magic on them but he and yen agreed that it was just like the spell on her. Appearance-based nothing more. The two old friends put their bedrolls basically on top of each other and Geralt often heard a small giggle from either one of them throughout the night. He kept his eyes looking up at the sky as to not know if his bard was bedding another.
In the morning Geralt stared shocked, as where there once was a small woman the night before there stood a tall buff man maybe even two inches taller than him. The man had on a simple tunic and leather pants, his hair was longer then Geralt’s and brown and wavy but was pulled up in a bun, he was broad-shouldered but still seemed to have a clumsy air about him, most importantly, he had green piercing eyes. Jaskier was basically hanging off the mans arm as he begged for the man to make him breakfast. All the man did was let out a low deep chuckle. Geralt forced a cough and that alerted the pair to his presence.
“Jaskier.” Geralt basically growled. He was demanding an explanation but the bard was busy trying to shove a pan into the taller person’s hands.
“You didn’t tell them?” The man said as fear ran through his eyes. “Jaskier!” They said in a deep roar. “You always do this”
“I didn’t think it was any of there business Cass! Who you are shouldn’t be that much of a big deal.” Jaskier responded. Geralt was almost hurt that he was being ignored but at least they weren’t being close like before. Somehow them fighting calmed him. “Also I don’t always do this.”
“Oh yeah? What about that time you basically demanded we have a threesome with that warrior woman? We bedded her as two men. You remember how you promised me, you would make sure I got to our room that night before the morning in case I wasn’t the same and it put our lives in danger? You know I get sleepy after sex! But you wanted another round so you let me fall asleep then and then you did after. Remember her reaction when she woke up and a woman was curled into her side? She almost killed us for ‘tricking’ her!” This statement did not calm Geralt. Especially coming from the beefy man in front of him. Jaskier definitely had a type. By now yen was awake and listening intently. It’s almost as if you could see the popcorn in her hand. Both of them were slowly piecing, where the women had disappeared to, together though.
“I thought you liked when I demanded you. You know you could have always said no. I only did that because of both of our enjoyment.” Jaskier genuinely looked worried and stepped closer to the other person before him, resting a soft hand on their arm.
“Jask, you know it’s not that. I did enjoy it...” they suddenly got quiet, becoming more aware of the others around them. “...can we not discuss my sexual desires in front of a witcher and a sorceress, please? I was saying you normally forget how hard it is for people to understand who I am. Not everyone is you Jaskier. Some people like a heads up that the women they met yesterday is now a man who looks like he weight lifts 3 cows every morning.”
“I know I’m sorry. I just forgot it’s not normal. You’re one of the most important people in my life, I just assumed others would judge you on character, not gender.” Jaskier apologized in a soft voice.
“It’s fine. I know you don’t mean harm.” They smiled and picked up Jaskier for a strong hug. Jaskier let out a giggle and hugged them back.
Geralt coughed letting them know of his presence once more. The taller person pulled away from the hug with a deep blush.
“Oh, I guess I’ll formally introduce myself as Jaskier didn’t. I’m Cass. Born Lady Cassandra. Jask likes to joke it’s actually short for Casanova. I have a similar spell as Yennefer if what Jaskier tells me and what I know about sorceresses is true. But mine is a bit more complicated. I don’t feel one gender or the other. I feel both but normally at different times. I settled mine with changing each day based on how my true self felt when the sun rises.” They extend their hand for Geralt to shake. He grabs it hesitantly.
“So your Jaskiers lover?” Yennefer asks bluntly.
“Ex-lover. No need to fear dear sorceress, I’m very much free for the taking.” They said with a chuckle and wink. “Me and Jask work much better at friends. So you need not worry either Witcher! I promise to not lay an ill-intentioned finger on your little bard. But if you don’t soon someone will. I mean unless you're not into small boys, if that’s that case I’ll over myself then” They laughed and it was deep and jolly. It felt like it could shake the whole forest.
“Cass!” Jaskier lept back into the conversation and slapped the other. “Stop flirting with my friends. They’ll start to like you more than me. Go make breakfast, Geralt always burns it.” He shoved the pan at them while pushing them to the fire.
OKAY IM STOPPING THERE.
Basically, I needed to get this out of my system to focus on actual fics. But it was really cute in my head. I hope you enjoyed 💕
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antpelts · 4 years
Note
POV for the writing asks? Your choice what for
no excuses writing meme
POV — something that’s already happened, retold from another character’s perspective
this is delightful yet horrible how could i ever choose! for the sake of relevancy ill go with something from im the rocks. shameless plug. shower scene from chapter 18 - from jareds pov. actually its just.. i basically just rewrote most of ch 18 from jareds pov maybe ill edit this for ao3 later 
“Rich gone?” 
Jared lifted his head, tearing his eyes off his phone to see Evan in his doorway. He was always so careful about taking his shoes off, about not making a mess. It was equal parts annoying and endearing. He practically lived in Jared and Rich’s room at this point and he was still treating it like a fancy hotel.
“Yup.” He locked his phone, watching as Evan shut the door behind him and paused in the middle of the room, looking like he didn’t know where to go. “Probably making out with his boyfriend.”
“Isn’t Jer with them?” Evan’s voice was still soft and he was still just standing there like a lost puppy. So he had to do everything himself. With a slight roll of his eyes he set his phone down among the blankets while shifting over to offer up some room to Evan. That was all it seemed to take because now he was crossing the room and gently hopping up onto the bed, slotting his body perfectly next to Jared’s own.
“Dude, I don’t know what the fuck is goin’ on with that,” Jared couldn’t help but let out a snort of laughter - Rich had been prattling on about that situation for weeks and as of late he had no clue who was actually dating who in that mess. With a sigh he just turned his head to bury his face in Evan’s shoulder, he really didn’t care to think about it for the time being.
“Your hair’s greasy.” Jared scoffed a little at that, taking note of how Evan tipped his head back instead of burying his face in his hair like normal. Normal. Well, this whole thing wasn’t very normal of them. Whatever it was.
“You can only be rude if it’s not to me, asshole,” he tried to keep his tone gruff but a breathy laugh slipped out at the end. He knew full well he was the only person who Evan felt comfortable being anything but painfully polite to. “Showering is hard. I didn’t wanna deal with it.”
“Have you.. not showered since you got the cast? That’s like..” Jared could practically hear the gears turning in Evan’s head until he opened his mouth to complete the thought, “two weeks.”
“Fuck dude, I’m not an animal!” Shifting a bit Jared weakly hit Evan’s chest, rolling his eyes to himself. “I kinda just.. wash my hair in the sink. And then like.. half shower. With, like, a wash cloth.”
“You know you can.. wrap your cast right?” 
Jared tried not to laugh in his face at that one.
“I may be dumb, but I’m not stupid.” When Evan finally laughed and let his shoulders relax he couldn’t help a triumphant grin. After a second he felt a nose against his hair and it was his turn to practically melt, sinking back against Evan. “Yeah. But then I’d have to like.. balance on my leg and carry all my shit.”
“I can help you.”
Jared couldn’t help but short circuit at that. It was disgustingly intimate and Jared wanted to fucking choke because now his face was red from the thought of Evan gently touching his hair. Years of fleeting dreams about making out with Evan (and maybe a little more) did nothing to prepare him for soft intimacy. But he also felt Evan tensing up under him and they didn’t need to be both thrown into a state of utter uselessness. It came out as nearly a whisper, “alright.”
But Evan didn’t seem to hear, breathing uneven as he stuttered out messy apologies.
“Evan. Fucking hell, earth to Ev.” With a quiet grunt Jared pushed himself up, bracing a hand on Evan’s chest. Sitting up he was able to look down at Evan, drawing his brows together as he looked over his face. He seemed sincere about the offer, if his panicked expression and continued whirlwind of mumbled apologies was anything to go off of.
“I’m so sorry that.. Sorry. Sorry. That was weird and gross I don’t-”
“Dude. I said alright. I mean, like,” Jared directed his gaze anywhere but Evan, feeling his own cheeks warm up a little as he tried to play it off, “like you can carry my shit. And like stand by the shower in case I need you to hand me something.”
“Oh.”
The bathrooms were big enough that he felt like he could play it off and Evan could hide in the corner while offering minimal assistance. Sure, maybe he’d prefer to have Evan with him, to lean back into him. Or.. to kiss his face while they washed each other’s hair. Fuck. Since when had he gotten so fucking soft? This was the shit he roasted Rich for.
“Wanna help me wrap my cast?”
There was no time like the present. Besides, if Evan was going to complain about how greasy his hair was then he’d make him eat those words. Or whatever.
Not to mention he was also a little worried that he wouldn’t be able to work up the nerve later, this conversation already had momentum he didn’t want to stop.
“N..Now?”
Jared just huffed out a sigh as he awkwardly clambered over Evan to slide off the bed, straining to grab his crutches once he made it to the floor.
“You don’t have to do this.” Jared looked up at him, raising an eyebrow as he looked over him. His face was still flushed and he was fidgeting with his hands. Heaving a sigh Jared just leaned to grab his phone and tuck it into his pocket before hobbling away from the bed. “I’ve managed so far.”
“But.. you want to uh..” Jared heard some rustling as Evan practically fell off the bed, stumbling to catch himself. He bit back a fond smile at the absurdity of it all and just dropped down onto the futon as gracefully as he could manage. “I wanna help.”
When Jared looked up Evan was already collecting the few plastic bags they had off the ground and that time he couldn’t help but smile a bit.
“Alright,” he said it like a leading question, waiting expectantly as Evan shifted his weight between his feet. He shifted so he could stretch his leg out for easier access and when he saw Evan practically waiting for a command he sighed, “tape is in the top desk drawer.”
Evan grabbed the duct tape and sat on the floor in front of Jared, wrapping up the cast with a sort of practiced ease. Jared’s cast was bigger than what he’d been used to before and he watched Evan scramble, digging around Rich’s side of the room for two extra bags to fully cover it. Once he was done he sat back on his heels, Jared could practically feel the nervousness radiating off of him. “But.. if someone sees us both go into a bathroom they’re gonna think..”
Right. The redness on Evan’s face was almost contagious. Just almost. Because now he was thinking about it too, well sort of, he didn’t care if anyone saw them, he barely knew anyone on the floor but.. The thought of sneaking away to the bathrooms with Evan for something else - that was enough to make him feel a little warm.
“Just wait like.. a minute and then follow me. Dude. No one cares, people do worse shit in those bathrooms. You’ll live.” His words seemed to be convincing enough and Evan was nodding now.
“Okay.. yeah. Alright.” Evan smoothed his palms over his pants before getting to his feet. Jared couldn’t help but feel a little amused by the shakiness in his knees - he’d caused that. Well, maybe. Maybe it was anxiety, knowing Evan. “I’ll just.. I can bring your clothes and shower stuff.. and everything. Yeah. You.. you can go now and I’ll.. I’ll be there in a second.���
“Text me if you change your mind.” Jared was pulling himself back up to his feet, wobbling on his crutches a bit before heading towards the door. Of course he’d give him an out, Evan looked on the verge of passing out and Jared really didn’t want to push whatever it was that they had. He liked kissing Evan. He liked laying with him. He.. liked him. When he managed to get the door open he gave a mock salute before heading into the hall, letting his shoulders slump as soon as he was out of sight.
The whole thing was a spur of the moment mess and in the moment the yearning for that tenderness had fogged everything. Now that he was alone and hobbling into the bathrooms he looked back on it, as he often did. There were so many times over their lives where Jared had jut pushed too far and now he was worried this was another. Huffing out a sigh he ducked into one of the open bathrooms, leaving the door unlocked behind him as he leaned on the wall to send a text.
Jared (6:22 pm): last one on the left  Duck (Ev) (6:23 pm): ok coming
That was promising at least. So maybe he wouldn’t get his tender fantasy of washing each other’s hair and feeling soft skin to skin contact - but at least he was getting a proper shower. And Evan wasn’t disgusted with him. Or something like that. Wow, he really was starting to sound like him. They were spending a lot of time together. He shook his head and moved to carefully balance his phone on the sink.
With nothing better to do he ran the water. Hot but not too hot. Evan would probably fret over him cooking himself if he showered with his normal water temperature. His heart stuttered at the thought of Evan fussing over him - he used to find it annoying, he used to call him overbearing, comparing him to his mother. It felt different this time.
Only a few minutes has passed before Evan was practically throwing himself into the bathroom and locking the door behind him. Outrageous. It brought a wide grin to Jared’s face as he shook his head fondly. 
“W..What?” Evan seemed to shrink in on himself a bit as he hung up the towel, using the second towel hook to hang Jared’s towel bag. His hands were practically shaking. 
“Shh,” Jared barely stifled a laugh as he whispered, “don’t want someone to hear.”
Evan was nodding frantically enough that just watching him could give Jared a headache. Instead he just stifled a laugh, shoulders shaking as he kept his cackling at bay, face scrunching up with pure amusement. Deciding not to waste any more time he just turned around, hiding his expression as it softened into something more fond. There was something oddly cathartic about being able to let some of that softness seep through instead of forcing it under lock and key. Well it wasn’t oddly cathartic. Probably just normal cathartic. The point was that he was just happy he didn’t have to hide.
Tucking his glasses into his shower bag he just leaned his crutches on the wall, awkwardly balancing as he tugged his clothes off. He’d gotten better at the whole process over the last two weeks. Especially considering he’d been alone for Thanksgiving break. He had a slight handle on it all. Enough, at least, to haul himself into the shower and finally get under the spray, blindly reaching for a bottle on shampoo while he let his hair get wet. 
Yeah. He needed this.
It only took a minute for Jared to encounter a problem. He didn’t have particularly good balance and with one hand propped up against the wall and one clutching onto his shampoo bottle.. he didn’t really have a way of going about this process. Which left one option. They’d made it this far, he might as well drive it home. Clearing his throat quietly he gave as loud of a whisper as he could manage, “hey.. Ev?”
“Uh.. yeah?” He’d heard Evan’s shoes on the tiles and based on his (blurry) shadow he was on the other side of the curtain.
“Okay, you’ve got me. I’ll admit defeat just this once.” Jared didn’t often make a habit of asking for help, but Evan was the single exception if there ever was one, “could you help me wash my hair? Balancing and opening bottles and blurry vision aren’t my favorite combination.”
“Oh but I..” The words set off some primal fear reaction in Jared, he sort of froze up. The silence was only broken by the sound of water. It was almost deafening. “I don’t.. wanna get my clothes wet.”
Jared swore he could fucking strangle him. 
“Well, the great thing about that is that you can take your clothes off to shower.” He managed a quiet laugh because if he didn’t laugh he was probably going to lose it in one way or another. Besides, if that was Evan’s mental block he could try and put that at ease because, “I’ve seen you without clothes before.”
“That.. that was..” Jared squinted a bit, watching as Evan’s shadow fidgeted on the other side of the shower curtain. He held back another laugh, it was probably cruel enough to bring that back up. Losing your swim trunks at the pool definitely wasn’t a pleasant experience.
“I’m already in here and I can’t really do this,” he went with a softer tone this time. The silence stretched on long enough to make Jared second guess everything. Maybe it was an utterly horrible idea. “Ev, it’s fine. I.. you don’t gotta, it’s cool.”
“I.. okay, hold on. Gimme.. a s..sec. I’m fine.”
For once Evan wasn’t pausing, he sounded.. well, as sure of himself as he possibly could. Considering his general aura it was pretty impressive. He heard clothes hitting the ground in a pile and it was suddenly very real and very intimate. 
“I.. okay. I’m coming in.”
When the curtain was pulled open Jared was met with the sight of Evan, eyes squeezed shut tightly. He had to laugh. And.. he was wearing boxers? So what, maybe he couldn’t help but spare a glance! It was sort of endearing actually.
“Jesus, are you serious?” Jared moved the smallest bit to the side so Evan could join him. The red in his face was from more than the warm water. Jared breathed out another laugh. “If you slip and die I’ll kill you.”
“That.. that doesn’t,” he was whispering harshly and no one would never know what he was going to say exactly because his voice faltered when Jared settled a hand on his shoulder.
“Oh my god. If you’re not going to open your eyes at least let me help,” his tone was light and airy - stupidly, he kind of felt like he was floating. Slowly, he helped direct Evan to move until he was standing behind him. “Here.”
After some fumbling he was pressing the bottle of shampoo into Evan’s hand, face scrunching up in amusement as he heard Evan struggle to get it open. Once he got the hang of it he was passing the bottle back and Jared gladly took it, head tipping back a bit instinctually. 
Nothing could have prepared him for the feeling of Evan washing his hair. It was different than when he jut played with it while they laid it bed - it made him feel something that was just intense and he couldn’t quite place it or put it into words. It was painfully tender and it made his knees weak. His eyes burned with the threat of tears.. or maybe there was shampoo in his eyes. That was probably it.
Being taken care of was.. nice. Maybe he’d let it happen a little more often.
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ladyboltontoyou · 5 years
Text
Arthur Morgan x Reader: Farmer’s Daughter
Ask: Ok well I was wondering if you could write an Arthur Morgan x Reader where the reader is the daughter of a rich farm owning family and Arthur rides up to the farm/ranch one day to scope the place out and see if they're easy to rob but somehow ends up with heart eyes for the reader and starts sneaking around to see her. Doesn't have to be smut, but that would be awesome. Thank you!
Warnings: Probably cursing. A bit of an age gap since Arthur is, you know, like 30 something, and the reader is still living with her parents.
Pairing: Arthur Morgan x Reader 
A/N: So this turned out longer than I had originally planned oops. ALso apparently freezers were invented around the 1830′s so don’t come at me for having ice cubes in Arthurs drink ok. I really hope this is what you imagined and it doesn’t seem rushed, even though I spent like 4 hours on it. Hope it’s not too short or too long. OKAY I’M DONE RAMBLING YOU CAN READ NOW.
The last thing you expected to see on a Friday afternoon was a stranger on a white horse riding up your dirt road. You had been reading a book on your upstairs balcony when you saw him, at first just a small white speck a ways away. But when that white speck started making noise you looked up and saw it was a man on a horse, a visitor. You rarely got visitors here that weren’t two men on a wagon full of supplies. 
You set your book down on the table and leaned forward to get a better look as he neared the front of your house. He looked handsome enough, even though you were on the second story balcony and he was on the ground below. From what you could see he was a rugged man about thirty or so, not the kind of men your parents usually dealt with. Your curiosity got the best of you and you walked back inside and downstairs where you saw your father opening the front doors. One of his work friends stood beside him in case things were to go south, his hand sitting comfortably on his pistol as a gentle warning to the stranger that stood on your porch.
“Sorry to bother you folks, I was looking for the Braithwaite manor and it looks like I got myself lost. Do you know whereabouts that is?” His voice sounded so friendly and warm, you would never expect that he was there to see if you would be easy to ransack. You watched the conversation go down from the bottom step of the staircase and tried not to look too obvious. 
Your father was totally oblivious and way too trusting. “No worries friend, these back roads are tricky. Fancy a drink? You look like you’ve been riding all day. Come inside and I’ll have my wife draw you up some directions.”
The man looked hesitant but eventually shrugged. “You’re too kind. I’d really appreciate it.” 
You took the chance to walk into the tea room since you knew they’d come inside any minute, and you didn’t want to look suspicious. Plus, you wanted to be nosey, it wasn’t often attractive strangers came by. You sat down at the table and picked up the book from the table, something you had already read before, and tried your best to look as if you had been doing it for some time already.
“Who’s that man outside?” Your mother had snuck up behind you and scared the daylights out of you when she leaned down to whisper in your ear.
“I don’t know.” You said after you recovered from the scare. “But he sure is good looking.” 
She peaked at the front door and nodded in approval at your taste. “You’re not wrong about that.” Thank god it was your mother and not your grandmother, she would have chided you for hours about being indecent. 
Finally, they came in and the man took off his hat, looking around as his eyes adjusted to the change of light. He looked even better looking close up. His facial hair was trimmed neatly but looked like it had grown in a little, the hair on his head the same. His face was partially spotted from the dust in the air from horse hooves but he didn’t look truly dirty, nothing compared to your farmboys.
 He looked around and seemed impressed with the place, his eyes looking into every room he could see from his spot. When he looked into the room your father began walking into, the tea room, he only spared you a short glance. 
Alright, well, you weren’t used to that. Most men who saw you immediately started complimenting your parents on how gorgeous you were, praising you and never failing to remark some version of ‘You’ll make a wonderful wife/Someone a very happy husband/Beautiful children’. But he didn’t say a thing.
“Darling, would you be so kind as to draw some directions from here to Braithwaite manor? Our friend  here has gotten lost.” Your father asked your mother who smiled and obliged, heading upstairs to get some paper. “Oh! I didn’t even see you there!” He said when he noticed you sitting on the couch. “Could you bring our guest some tea?”
The stranger looked at you and looked like he was about to decline and tell you not to worry yourself but you were already standing up. “Sure thing daddy, need anything else?” You asked sweetly with a smile. 
Your father looked to the man who just shook his head and tried to say ‘I’m fine’ and ‘No thank you’ at the same time. “No, I’m, thank you,” He jumbled over his words and looked visibly embarrassed. “I’m alright.”
You smiled widely, amused by that. He looked away and scratched the back of his head awkwardly. Your father paid no mind and led him to the couch, talking about how harsh the month had been with no rain at all. 
When you got back from the kitchen with a glass of tea he looked up and accepted the glass from you happily, muttering a ‘thanks’ before he almost chugged the entire thing, even chewing on some of the ice. Your mother came down the stairs with a piece of paper in hand and one of your nice fountain pens in the other. 
“You’ll have to excuse my writing, I’m not the best artist.” She joked and sat on the single chair across from the couch. “You should have told our artist here to do it instead, she could draw him the best map he’d ever laid his eyes on.” She joked and you tried not to let them see how bashful she made you. She always bragged about you and anything you did, you could draw something purposefully awful and she would still treat it like a priceless painting.
“Oh it’s alright, I’m sure I’ll manage.” He chuckled, taking more ice into his mouth. 
You sat down on the other side of the couch and watched the man from the corner of your eye. He looked around the house while his jaw moved to chew the ice as if he was taking note of every single window and door. “Say, you folks-”
Your mother sighed in frustration, putting two fingers on her forehead in exasperation. “I’m sorry, I can barely draw a line. Darling, could you please?” She slid the paper across the table and gave you a sweet look.
“I’ll try.” You laughed and leaned down, taking the pen from her.
“What were you saying?” Your father asked from his seat and the man looked confused before he remembered.
“I was just going to ask if you knew of some good people to hire for security. Assuming those men at the end of the road are what I’m thinkin’ they are.”
“Yes, they work for a man named Michael, he hires men that used to be in the war and sells their services to those who can afford it.” Your father said proudly. Arthur just nodded.
“Here’s the house.” You said to the man as you drew a small house next to the scribbles your mother had done. He scooted closer to you carefully and watched as you drew. “And here’s the road. The corn fields are on the right, the tobacco on the left.” You kept talking as you drew and tried to focus on moving the pen instead of how close he was to you. His body heat radiated off of him and grazed your bare arm and neck, you could hear him breathing slowly. He smelt like smoke and day-old cologne mixed with the leather from his coat. 
As you gave him directions he would never need Arthur felt morality tug at his heartstrings. You were such good people, welcoming him into your home and showing such hospitality. He would have to tell Dutch there was no way, there were too many workers and guards, he would make something up. He came expecting a snooty rich family but was caught off guard by good people. You all had the generosity, kindness, and respect of poor folk.
When you finished you slid the map over on the table. “Let it sit for a minute before you touch it, the ink’s still wet.” You warned and put the cap back on the pen. “Especially here.” You laughed softly and pointed at the words of his destination where you had spelled it wrong the first time and scratched it out.
He nodded and muttered an ‘alright’, looking at you from a side glance. Your father talked for a while about the people who lived in the manor, not being shy about his opinion. Arthur couldn’t have agreed more but he kept up his facade and played dumb. 
“It’s dry now.” You said and Arthur looked away from your father. You were looking at the paper so he took the chance to actually look at you, unintentionally admiring you. Normally he was good about keeping his eyes where they belonged. If there was anyone who respected women it was Arthur, but it was hard not to appreciate your beauty. He figured your sweetness was the only reason he stared. It had been a while since he saw a sweet girl who wasn’t trying to pickpocket him or get him to spend a fortune in the saloon. 
“Thank you.” He picked up the paper and admired your work. One of the few things he could really appreciate was art. You drew so effortlessly, the small roads and hills looked like the maps he’d seen the professionals sell. “Well, I reckon I better be on my way, I’ve taken up too much of your time.” 
“Not at all.” Your father stood up and so did the stranger. They shook hands as he thanked your father who shook him off and pat his back a few times. “You sure there’s nothing else we could do for you?”
“You’ve done more than enough.” He promised and looked back to you and your mother, the paper held gently in his hands. “Thank you both for your hospitality. And for the map.” He held up the paper and you smiled, causing him to unknowingly do the same. 
When he started walking out the door with your father you ran upstairs and almost fell off your balcony to watch him ride off. The hot wind hit your face when you reached the banister, just in time to watch him ride off. He put his hat back on and took one last look behind him, not failing to notice the beautiful young girl watching him leave.
***
The frogs and crickets sang while the fireflies lit the black air with soft pulsating gold. You were on your banister half reading a book and half watching the farmboys work in the fields below, their lanterns bobbing gently through the rows of plants, stopping occasionally to pull up weeds or a dead plant. 
It was hard to read. It was stupid to even try. But there was nothing else to do to take your mind off of your thoughts, even though reading wasn’t doing a good job at that. At least it was something.
A dog barking in the distance made you set your book down. It was the dogs they kept up at the end of the road to warn when someone was coming. You waited a minute to see if they would calm down but they didn’t. You heard your father yell downstairs to the men at the end of the road, and they responded with something about deer in the woods. 
You believed it for a moment until you heard rattling from the other side of your balcony. The first thing that came to mind was some kind of greasy gunslinging bastard but before you could start screaming two arms hooked over the side of the ledge, covered by that same damn leather jacket you had been so close to earlier. 
It shouldn’t have made you feel any better considering his original intentions were to rob your family for everything they had. But for some reason you had a feeling he wasn’t a threat to you. That made you incredibly stupid and naive but thankfully, for once, you were right in this situation. 
When he finally pulled himself over he looked surprised to see you standing there watching him. “Now, before you start screaming,” He said as he reached up to grab the lantern that hung above him. “I’m not here to hurt you or anything like that.” He blew out the small flame and the two of you were suddenly surrounded by darkness. 
“Then why are you here?” You asked cautiously. It wasn’t like you didn’t want to see him again, but the last thing you expected was this. If anyone saw him your father's politeness would be out the window as well as Arthur.
He sighed as if he didn’t know why himself. “You been on my mind girl, and I don’t know why. I don’t know why my dumbass thought it would be a good idea to risk not only my ass but yours, just to come back up here and ask for your name.”
You covered your mouth to stifle that bubbled in your throat. “Truly? That’s why?”
Arthur laughed softly, shaking his head when he realized how ridiculous it was. “I suppose so. And I wanted to ask for another one of those hundred-dollar drawings you make.” 
You laughed again and put your fingers on the bottom lip you held between your teeth. “Oh yeah? Was my map that good?”
He grinned and looked down at his boots, kicking them against the floor to kick some pebbles loose from the bottoms. He couldn’t believe how young he felt then, like he was only sixteen again flirting around with the farmer's daughter. The only thing different from that was he was much, much, much older. If the other men in the gang saw him they’d make fun of him till the day he died for sneaking around for a girl. 
“Well, okay, I guess I can make you something.” You smiled while biting your lip. He put on a show of acting grateful, clasping his hands together and placing them in front of his forehead. When you recovered from quiet laughter you went into your room to get some paper and a pencil. You made sure both your doors were locked before you went back onto your dark balcony. You stopped in the open doorway, noticing how little you could see. There was no way you could draw anything out there unless a lantern was lit, but that would be too bright and anyone nearby would be able to see the two of you. “I can’t see out here, maybe we should go in my room.” 
He was reluctant for a minute, considering how fast he’d be able to run and jump out the balcony if need be. “Yeah, sure.” He sighed and walked towards the doors. The spurs on his boots lightly jingled and you could hear fabric moving against fabric as he moved past you into your dimly lit room. “Been a while since I’ve been in a room this nice.” He admitted as he looked around your room. 
“You live in a barn then?” You teased and sat down at the table near the windows. “Oh, I never told you my name. It’s (Y/N).” 
Arthur leaned against the wall near you and crossed his ankles, nodding as he thought over your name. “(Y/N). Never met anyone with that name before.”
You smiled proudly, twirling the pencil in your fingers. “And yours?”
He paused, considering while he looked out the window. “Arthur.” He said finally and looked back to you. 
“Arthur.” You mused before remembering what you were supposed to be doing. “Ah, sorry, what did you say you want me to draw you?”
He snorted and crossed his arms. “I didn’t give that any thought, do anything you’d like.” 
You bit your lip and looked him up and down. “Okay. It might take me a little while though.” He wanted to say ‘good’, but held his tongue and settled for a ‘That’s okay’.
After about an hour of talking, constant talking, you were finally finished. “If I had longer I could have done better, but, here.” You slid the paper across the table to him. After a while, he got tired and had sat down across from you.
He took the paper in his hands and squinted before his eyes widened. “Christ, girl.” He breathed and looked over the lines and shading. “You’re better than me.”
“You draw too?” You asked with sudden interest but he didn’t respond, he was too caught up in the paper in front of him. 
“I can’t believe this. Did you take a picture of me when I wasn’t looking?” He shook his head and scratched his chin as he continued admiring it. 
You blushed and ran a hand through your hair, he made you into a flustered mess with those praises. They were different when they were coming from someone who wasn’t kin. “Thank you.” It was all you could say. You didn’t expect him to like it that much, it was a hurried sketch of him leaning against your wall, but as much as you liked to pretend your art wasn’t that good there was no denying that this was an exceptionally realistic drawing. You were almost sad to see it go.
Arthur shook his head and looked up from the paper, looking at you completely different. Like how your father looked at your mother the first time he saw her shoot a gun. Newfound respect and admiration glinted in those pretty blue eyes of his, all directed to you. He was going to say something else but the sounds of heels coming up the stairway stopped him. 
“(Y/N)! I just found a letter from June, it came yesterday but-” She grabbed your doorknob and tried to open it, only succeeding in causing the door to shake slightly. Arthur looked at you with wide eyes as she called out your name a second time. 
“Go, hurry!” You whispered and he sat up as quickly and quietly as he could, tiptoeing to the open doors. “One second, I’m changing into my nightdress!” You called back to her as you rushed the grown man out of your room.
He paused in the same spot he had climbed up, one hand on the jasmine covered lattice he had used as a ladder. “Could I come see you again?” He asked boldly, the paper in his hand slightly moving from the breeze. 
You laughed in disbelief. “There’s no way I could say no to that. You better.”
Arthur smiled then, the widest and cheesiest smile he had worn in a while. If it wasn’t for the lantern sitting inside your room next to the window he stood near, you wouldn’t have seen it. You wanted to say more, but he swung his legs over the edge and left you to explain to your mother why you spent so long doing something so simple.
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takerfoxx · 4 years
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IM Swiftly Descending Darkness, Chapter 7
Down.
Deep down, down, down.
Down into the dark. Down into the cold. Down into the place devoid of light, devoid of kindness, devoid of hope.
Down into the place of pain. Down into the place of despair. Down into the place from which there is no escape, the place set aside for those of the blackest of souls, of the darkest of hearts.
Down into the prison set in the furthest reaches of existence, down into the place intended to swallow the progenitors of evil and suffering, down into the place of Judgment.
Down into the dark.
Down into the cold.
Down into chains.
And then…a face. A pale, beautiful face, framed by long hair so dark that it melts into the darkness that frames it. It is not the face of a man or a women, but of an ethereal creature whose beauty defies gender, defies mortality, defies humanity.
But it is a cruel beauty, to be feared rather than desired. It is beautiful like a wildfire is beautiful, like a hurricane is beautiful, like a black hole is beautiful, and so much more destructive, so much more malicious.
Its eyes are closed, though not in sleep, but in waiting.
Its eyes are closed, but its mouth is moving, curling up into a poisonous smile.
Rumia’s eyes snapped open.
The view she was greeted with was at once familiar, yet alien. The wooden slats of a slightly slanted wooden roof were above her. She knew those slats, every single line and nick and knot. She saw them when she went to bed and they were the first thing that greeted her when she woke up.
And yet she couldn’t stop staring at them. No, that wasn’t right. They shouldn’t be there; she shouldn’t be there! She ought to be seeing…
Darkness.
Rumia’s right eye twitched.
Cold.
No, she was home! She was in the Aoki Yume’s Children’s Home, the only home she had ever known! This was normal!
Chains.
Then why did it look so unfamiliar? Why did she feel so out of place?
“Rumia?”
Rumia turned her head toward the voice. She was greeted by a nut-brown, heart-shaped face, one with large, dark eyes and shiny black hair that hung over one shoulder in a tightly knotted ponytail.
Once again she was struck by a wave of recognition and confusion. Who is this person? whispered one part of her mind.
What do you mean? answered another. It’s Melissa Garcia! You see her every day!
“Estas despierto!” Melissa said excitedly, which was something neither part of Rumia understood. “Oh, gracias a Jesús!” Then she cleared her throat and said slowly, “Are you all right?”
Rumia didn’t answer. She just stared.
“Rumia?” Melissa waved her hand in front of Rumia’s face. Her dark eyes frowned in concern. “Can you…Can you hear me?”
Rumia opened her mouth to respond. “Who are…” Then she stopped. No, wait, that wasn’t right. “Melissa,” she said. “What happened?”
Before Melissa could answer, someone groaned in discomfort and confusion.
As Melissa ran over to see to the person in question, Rumia struggled to put her thoughts in order. What the hell had happened? They had been…okay, there was the fight at the market, that much she remembered pretty well. And after that had been flying lessons. And then-
The spider’s long, gaunt face stretched as it opened its mouth wide. Inside was a black pit, filled with row after row of quivering teeth.
Rumia shivered. Right. The spiders. The kidnapping. The forest-
The slender creature turned its faceless visage toward her. It reached out with one stick-thin limb, as long as Miss Mokou was tall.
Rumia covered her face. No, please. Make it stop.
Eiko lay upon the table, her torso split wide open. The spiders were feasting upon her innards, ripping away chunks of meat and offal with their teeth. Her face was still visible, the pale flesh now splattered with her own blood, the eyes plucked right from the sockets and yet still managing to convey the terror and pain she had been feeling in her final moments.
No, no, no, no!
The spider had them, had ensnared their legs. It was dragging them back, pulling them to their deaths.
And then…and then…
What had happened then?
She had vague memories of something explicably twisted, something to do with…skeletons? Skeletons and sand? It had been horrible, that much she was certain of, but try as she might, she couldn’t recall more than a few fleeting images.
Rumia struggled to sit up. She was in the sick room, where kids who fell ill or were injured were kept to recover, as well as to prevent diseases from spreading. It was a small room surrounded by cabinets, with several sleeping mats spread on the ground. She was lying on one of the sleeping mats, with others around her. She saw Haruko and Hayate, still unmoving and unresponsive. Kana was there too, looking even more unwell than usual. Keine seemed to be sleeping unsoundly, if the way her closed eyes and jaw was tightening up and her face shone with sweat.
Kohta, however, had also woken up. He had been the one groaning, and was now sitting up as well, with Melissa kneeling next to him.
“Ugh,” he said as he rubbed his forehead. “What…where…”
“Sick room,” Melissa told him. “Um, are you all right?”
Kohta squinted at her. “Who…what…?”
Melissa swallowed. “It is me. Melissa Garcia. Do you not know me?”
“Melissa?” Kohta blinked his eyes several times and shook his head. “Oh, right. Melissa. Hi.”
“Hello. Are you…” Melissa reached over to touch his shoulder.
Kohta violently recoiled. “Don’t touch me!”
Melissa quickly withdrew her hand. “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to…”
“Don’t,” Kohta repeated. “Just don’t touch me. Don’t.”
“Um…” Melissa’s eyes flicked from Kohta to Rumia to find them both glaring at her. “Er, okay?” She nervously licked her lips. “Are you…okay?”
Neither Rumia nor Kohta said anything.
“Right.” Melissa stood up. “I will go get Miss Satoko then.”
She hurried from the room, leaving the two of them sitting together in silence.
Joshua sat on the edge of his bed, bowed head in his hands. His lips moved silently but fervently, in time with the prayer he had been repeating in his head and heart over and over ever since that night in the Youkai Forest.
Lord, grant me strength. Please. I don’t know what to do. I need your guidance now. Jesus, please.
It had been three days since the children had been taken by the spiders. Three days since he had plunged into the forest alone in hopes of finding them. Three days since he had seen the cruelty suffered by poor Eiko on her last day. Three days since he had been thoroughly reminded of the stark evil that prowled his new home’s darkest corners.
Three days since he had seen his friend Fujiwara no Mokou for what she really was.
Joshua had seen and even done his share of things that he would like to forget, and that night was filled with more than its fair share. But nothing would ever compare to those few minutes, when he had sat by himself in the middle of the scorched remains of the spider’s lair, Eiko’s butchered body sitting in a filthy sack next to him, hands covering his ears as he tried not to hear what Mokou was doing to those spiders.
Please! Mercy, I beseech yah!
But no matter how hard he pressed his palms to his ears, no matter how loudly he prayed, he could never shut out their screams, nor the cold, pitiless sound of Mokou’s voice.
Mercy? You have the gall to beg me for mercy? Did you show mercy to that girl? Tell me: when she screamed, did you laugh? When she cried, did it make you feel powerful? When she stopped moving, were you disappointed that your fun was over?
No! I’m sorry, we wun’t do it again, I-AAAAAHHHHHHH!!!
And then the smell of burning flesh, already hanging thick along with the stench of ash and rot, had suddenly grown.
I can go as slow or as fast as you like. I can break, I can pop, and I can burn. Slow cook or searing flame, whatever I choose. And if you don’t want me to start getting creative, you’re going to tell me everything I want to know. You do that, and I’ll simply turn you all into to ashes so you can resurrect good as new later. One quick flash-fire, and it’ll all be over. Or I can draw this out. Your choice.
Yes! Yes! Questions! Ask yah questions, I’ll tell yah everything!
Tears had dripped down Joshua’s face then, just as they were in the present. Crouching by himself in the forest or sitting safe and sound on his bed, it made no difference. The sounds of agony and the reek of death were just as fresh.
Good. Now, word has reached me that this whole endeavor wasn’t even your idea. Not at first, at least. You were put up to this, by a Human from the Human Village, weren’t you?
At this, Joshua had stopped shaking and praying. And though he knew that he probably ought not to, he had removed his hands from his ears and listened.
Yes! Yes! Summin from dere! Came tah us, ‘e did. Sayin’ ‘e would pay us tah go aftah dah orphans! Said ‘e would t-t-take out dey deffinses, dey charms an’ shit!
Take out their defenses? Someone had really gone out of their way to stir up evil youkai against the children and had promised to leave them helpless? And it had been another Human?
Who? Who was it? What did they look like?
I dunno! Never saw ‘em face!
Oh, that is not the answer you should have given me.
No! I swear, I dun’t-AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!
The sounds of the spider’s had screams mixed with a burning hiss.
I swear, I swear, please no more. Never saw ‘is face. Wore a big ol’ cloak, ‘e did. Short fella, kinda chunky. Stank o’ fear. Squeaky voice.
Joshua stood up and made for the door.
Hmmm, well, that’s not exactly a whole lot to go on. Gotta do better than that.
Dat’s all I know! Dat’s all!
He made his way through the hall and down the stairs.
You know, I think your burnt bits are distracting you. Making it hard to remember. You think if I take those hands off it’ll jog your memory?
No! I swear, dat’s all I ‘ave!
To the front door and out onto the porch.
Well, if you say so. I guess we’re done here.
Yes! Yes, please! End it!
As you wish. Hey, you know how there’s actually a couple kind of fire that you can’t recover from? That’ll burn your body so completely that those meager magics holding it together won’t be able to stitch you up?
Down the steps, onto the front path, and into the grassy lawn.
You ain’t no Dragon! YOU AIN’T NO DRAGON!
No, I’m not. Dragonfire is unfortunately in short supply around here. But I got the next best thing.
The…The Phoenix’s Daughter! Yer dah Phoenix’s Daughter! NO, PLEASE! PLE-AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!
The now-dead spider’s final screams still echoing in his ears, Joshua found Mokou out in the field. She was walking all along the perimeter fence and slapping paper charms to the posts.
Upon their return, one of the first things Mokou had done was go out and inspect all of the magical wards they had set up around the estate. It had been just as they feared. All the charms had been sabotaged, rendered powerless. Which meant that even if Kana hadn’t accidentally blown herself and the others past the fence, the spiders would have been able to get in anyway. The implications of that were horrifying to think about.
Taking a deep breath to steady himself, Joshua approached her.
“Um, Mokou?” he said.
“Josh. Good,” Mokou said, giving him only the quickest of glances. “Come and give me a hand here.”
Honestly, at this point Joshua really didn’t want to see what was undoubtedly more bad news, but he went over to her anyway. “Look, I know we haven’t really talked much since, you know, the forest, but-”
“Then talk while you’re helping me,” Mokou said, shoving a handful of charms into his hand. “You know what this means, don’t you?”
“Huh?”
“What our charms being sabotaged means. What that spider told us means.” Though Mokou didn’t raise her voice, the anger seeping through was palpable. “This wasn’t just some dumbass youkai looking to score a meal growing too bold. This was a set-up. A hit. Eiko was basically assassinated!”
“Assassinated?” Joshua tried to wrap his head around the concept. “But by whom? Who would do something like this?”
At this, Mokou said nothing. She just shot him a meaningful look.
After a beat Joshua said, “You don’t know that for sure.”
“He’s still the number one suspect,” Mokou said.
“Maybe. But that doesn’t mean-”
“I’ve been gone digging up whatever info I could find,” Mokou said as she walked from post to post, sticking pieces of paper onto each one. “And I’ve learned a few things. Nothing conclusive, but enough to point fingers in Skinner’s direction. And you have to admit, it tracks.”
“And if it is him?”
“Well, then my job just got a whole lot simpler.”
Joshua felt the blood leaving his face. “Job?”
“Yeah. Protect the house. Protect the kids. If the reason we’re getting attacked by youkai is also the reason that all the Humans are turning against us, then that means there’s fewer people I gotta go after.”
“Go after,” Joshua repeated. “You mean, like you went after those spiders?”
“That’s exactly what I mean,” Mokou said without shame. Her hand squeezed into a fist, crumbling the burnt charms to dust. “Joshua, I know why you came out here to talk to me. I know you saw a side of me you didn’t like. I get that. But understand this: you cannot make me regret what I did to those spiders. It’s not going to happen.”
Just the small reminder of what had happened to those spiders send a shiver up Joshua’s spine. “Yes, but-”
“No,” Mokou said. “No ‘but.’ No arguments. I don’t subscribe to your religion, and I don’t care about your god. I’m sorry you had to be there for that sorry business, but I’d do it again in a heartbeat. After what they did to Eiko, they deserved no less. Hell, I’d bet anything that that wasn’t the first kid they did it too either. Or Human. So save your speeches about forgiveness and mercy. I don’t care. And if I have to do the same to Skinner and every single one of his followers to prevent another one of our kids from ending up like Eiko, then so be it. They already tell stories about me. What’s one more?”
“Mokou, no,” Joshua whispered.
Annoyance flashed through Mokou’s maroon eyes. “Joshua,” she said, warning in her voice.
“No,” he said hastily. “I mean, you can’t just go kill everyone connected to him. That’ll just prove his point and set the rest against us. Besides, even if he is to blame, odds are he’s hiding this from his followers. They’re all worked up about youkai, so do you really think he’d tell them that he’s been cutting deals with them?”
“Don’t care,” Mokou said. “They come at us again, then that’s on their heads.” Then she frowned. “Though I guess you have a point. Don’t want to go making any martyrs. That never turns out well.”
Joshua wondered how much personal experience she had with that. “Just please wait until we learn more,” he said. “As for the spiders, well, I know I’m not going to change your mind about that.”
“Good.”
“But that’s not what I wanted to talk to you about,” he said.
Mokou quirked a silver eyebrow. She leaned up against the fence and waited.
Joshua had been trying to work out how to word his question over and over and had yet to come up with a satisfactory way, so he decided to just say it. “Mokou, who are you?” he said. “Or rather, what are you?”
Satoko sat alone in the basement of her family’s orphanage, just her and Eiko Goto’s body.
When Mokou and Joshua had emerged together from the forest with their missing children draped lifelessly over Mokou’s shoulders, Satoko had feared the worst. They had been too late, the children were all dead or dying, and had only been returned to them as corpses.
To her utmost relief, Mokou had assured her that the kids weren’t dead, only unconscious, and they would be waking up in time. Satoko had felt like massive stones were being rolled off her shoulders. They were all right. Despite all the odds against them, their family was still whole, they had survived yet another outside attack.
And then she had noticed that Mokou only had six kids with her when there should have been seven. When Satoko had asked about Eiko, Mokou only looked over to Joshua, who was carrying a filthy burlap sack over one shoulder. And when Satoko had inquired about what was in the sack, Joshua had said nothing; he didn’t need to. The look in his eyes had told her all that she needed to know.
This of course was not the first time that one of the orphans of Aoki Yume’s Children’s Home had died before coming of age. It wasn’t even the first to occur in Satoko’s lifetime. Hell, it wasn’t even the first to be murdered by a youkai. Gensokyo was full of dangers, all of which were especially deadly to children. At the end of a path that led from the back door, sitting nestled in a small grove of pine trees, was their private cemetery. Satoko’s ancestors were all buried there, as were any of the other helpers that had passed away while working at the orphanage. But most of those buried there had headstones bearing two dates that had gaps between them that were altogether too short.
Satoko had had to bury too many during her life. She had buried her parents, her elder sister and her uncle. She had buried Mr. Matsuda, Miss Kyouko, Miss Lillian, and Mrs. Oa. But while all of their deaths had been sad and painful, they had at least all been due to the ravages of age.
Burying Shuna, Kenta, Eru, Tobi, and Kano had hurt so much more.
And now she was going to have to bury Eiko.
And the worst of it was that she shouldn’t have to.
The fingers of Satoko’s right hand slowly squeezed themselves into a fist and uncurled again, only to clench right back up. Mokou had found something. They hadn’t much time to talk, but Mokou had said that there was more to this than a simple youkai attack, that someone had set this up, someone Human.
The number of people who were set against the orphanage was far larger than it had any right to be, but this was beyond the pale. Wasn’t it enough that they had turned their backs on parentless children, that they had driven them away and denied them support, that they now also actively stirred up dark spirits to murder them? And the same dark spirits that the children themselves were accused of trafficking with no less! It was nothing short of monstrous!
At the very least she knew who was ultimately responsible. This had Nathaniel Skinner’s gloved fingerprints all over it.
I should just let Mokou kill him, Satoko thought bitterly. Him, and everyone else listening to him. What were they going to do about it, isolate her family even more than they already were? Keep trying to kill them? That bird had flown.
Then, as she sat in the dimly lit basement with nothing more than a dead child and her own bitter thoughts for company, Satoko heard something.
It was very faint, so faint that she wasn’t sure that she wasn’t imagining it. It was a little like a soft moan of fear, the whimper of a sleeping baby beset by nightmares.
Satoko listened intently. No, her mind wasn’t playing tricks on her. She was hearing it all right. Someone was softly crying to themselves, someone down there with her. It sounded like a little girl.
And it was coming from Eiko’s shroud-covered corpse.
Satoko slowly breathed out. Well, it was happening again. This was to be expected, after all. She had had to prepare many of those who had passed away under her care for burial herself, and dead bodies were unfortunately not as silent as one might hope. Gas got trapped, their insides shifted, and they could sometimes be alarmingly noisy.
Trapped in what? She was mostly eaten! Her stomach, her intestines, and her lungs are all gone!
The muffled weeping was getting a little louder. Satoko remained sitting where she was, staring at the still form on the table.
She had to be imagining things now, because she was quite certain that she just saw something move beneath the shroud.
Satoko slowly rose from her chair and walked over to the body. Her heart was pounding quite loudly now, and her hands had started to tremble.
This is nothing, she told herself. You’re just weary and scared. You haven’t slept well in days. Of course you wouldn’t be all there. Just let it lie.
Instead, she reached down with one hand and gently pulled the shroud away from Eiko’s face.
The whimpering stopped.
When Mokou and Joshua had shown her the remains of Eiko’s body, her face had been completely gone. Her scalp and hair were still in place, but those monsters had ripped away her lips, cheeks, and nose, exposing the skull beneath, which was smiling its red-stained grin back up at Satoko. Her eyes were gone too, no doubt plucked out and swallowed like a pair of grapes.
Satoko had stared a long time at the ghastly visage. She had seen the ravaged remains of children under her care before, and would no doubt do so again before Death claimed her in her turn, but there was something truly disturbing about the carcass now lying before her, something that terrified her. This wasn’t just some cruel turn of fate, this was deliberate cruelty against an innocent, set in motion by those who should have worked to protect her.
This was evil.
However, all of that was gone now. Eiko’s face was once again whole and unharmed. Her eyes were closed, as if in sleep.
Then Satoko gasped. Eiko’s mouth was moving, the plump lips slowly moving up and down, like she was trying to speak.
Satoko stood frozen with fear, staring unblinking as Eiko’s mouth opened ever so slightly and closed again, over and over, like she was trying to tell Satoko something, something important enough to return for from beyond the grave.
Her mouth finally fell open, and out crawled a fat-bodied black spider. It crawled up Eiko’s face, toward her eyes.
Then something knocked loudly on the basement door.
“Miss Satoko!” Melissa’s voice called from the other side. “Venga rápido! They are awake!”
Satoko couldn’t help from crying out in shock as her whole body jolted. Panting, she held a hand to her thundering heart.
The spider was gone. As was Eiko’s face. It was again a ravaged horror, the flesh ripped off, leaving her bloodstained with its rictus grin and hollow eye sockets.
Satoko hastily pulled the sheet back in place and hurried toward the door. Melissa was there, hand still raised to knock.
“Yes!” Satoko said, perhaps a bit too loudly. “Thank you!”
Melissa nodded. She was about to turn to go, but then her gaze shifting to a spot beyond Satoko. “Ah,” she said. “Is that…”
Satoko quickly moved her away from the door and shut it tight. “Don’t look, Melissa. Just leave her be.”
“Okay,” Melissa said hoarsely. “Um, Miss Satoko?”
“Yes?”
“Is it…” Melissa’s brow furrowed, as it often did when she needed to search her mind for the right word. “Regular? No. Expected?”
“Normal?” Satoko suggested.
“Right! Is it normal that Rumia and Kohta would be…angry after waking up?”
“Angry?” Satoko was puzzled. “How do you mean?”
“They seemed…angry. And…a little mean?”
“At you?”
Melissa nodded.
Sighing, Satoko laid a hand on Melissa’s shoulder. “Well, they’ve been through a lot. I imagine they’re still scared and confused, so don’t take it personally.”
“They didn’t look confused,” Melissa said after a pause. “They just looked angry.”
Satoko
Joshua had been bracing himself for Mokou’s response the whole time. Would be angry? Take offense? If he pressed too hard, might she even turn violent? He didn’t think so, but then again, he had been learning a lot about her that he could never have previously guessed at.
But instead, she laughed. “Oh wow, you just up and said it,” she said. “Honestly, I thought someone would’ve tried prying that out of me my first week.” Then she thought for a moment, and then amended, “Though I guess a few of the kids got real persistent with their questions, but they’re easy to wave off.”
“I’m serious though,” Joshua pressed. “Mokou, you were dead. I saw that knife bury itself in the back of your head! It went right into your brain.”
“It did,” Mokou said with a nod.
“That should have killed you!”
“It did,” Mokou said again.
“So…why are you alive? How did you get up? Are you a youkai?”
Mokou laughed again. “Well, that’s actually kind of a complicated question.”
That was not the answer Joshua had been hoping for. “How? It’s a yes or a no question!”
“Not really,” Mokou shrugged. “See, the thing you gotta understand is that ‘youkai’ is actually kind of a fluid term. We use it as a catch-all for any magical creature that came out of something that wasn’t, well, magic before, but it kind of encapsulates a whole lot of variety.”
Joshua stuck his hands in his pockets and rocked back and forth on his heels. “I’m listening.”
“Well, see, you got your elemental youkai, you got the ones that come from animals, you got the ones that seem to pop out of whatever odd garbage people left lying around, you got those weirdly specific creeps, you got the ones that I guess come from abstract concepts that I’ve never really been able to figure out, you’ve got your wide variety of spirits.” Mokou drew a finger down the side of her face. “Then you got the ones that come from people. Some of them fall into that whole weirdly specific conditions category, but you also got those that manage to turn themselves into youkai on purpose. A lot of magicians do that. They got a whole ritual for it. In one go, they get eternal life and a new wellspring of magic, so you can see why it’s popular.”
“And is that what you are?”
“Nope.” Mokou straightened up and started walking. Joshua followed her. “I’m something…different.”
“Explain, please.”
The place Mokou led him to was a ring of old logs surrounding a patch of sand, in the middle of which was a smaller ring of stones. On warm summer days they would light a bonfire and all the children would circle around on the logs, listening to someone tell stories.
All the adults took turns as the storyteller, but Joshua and Mokou were the favorites. Joshua would regale the children with stories he had brought with him from the Outside World, as well as those found in the Bible. He wasn’t especially picky too. The saga of Samson was told alongside the journey of Bilbo Baggins. The legend of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves sat comfortably alongside David and Goliath.
Mokou’s tales were of a different sort, ones with fewer heroes and a great many more monsters. She would whisper of bloodthirsty spirits and twisted demons, creatures made up from the bones of the condemned that formed in executioner’s fields or severed heads that crawled about on spider legs, and almost every one of her stories had a bad ending. If Joshua’s stories made the kids laugh and cheer, hers would leave them shivering.
Joshua had a feeling that this particular tale would be no different.
Mokou sat down on the storyteller’s log, with Joshua sitting down on the log next to hers. She held out a hand, flexed her fingers, and a ball of red flame appeared in the air over her palm. A gesture, and it leapt to the ring of stones and filled them with flame, despite there being no wood to feed the fire.
“Wish we had some marshmallows,” Joshua muttered, mostly to himself.
Mokou stared blankly at him. “Some what?”
“Er, sorry. They’re, uh, a kind of campfire snack. Basically puffed up balls of sugar that you’d stick on sticks and roast in the fire.”
“Oh. I see. Outside World thing?”
“Yeah.”
“Huh,” Mokou said. She shrugged. “Okay. Well, it’s like one of those stories you like to tell the kids. What’d’ya call them again? Fairy…legends? Fairy myths?”
“Oh. Fairytales. Um, we don’t have fairies where I come from, but they show up a lot in really old children’s stories, so we just call old stories about magic fairytales.”
Mokou favored him with a thin smile. “You’re a fool if you think that you don’t have fairies. Or magic for that matter. They’re just not out in the open like they are here.”
“That’s probably true,” Joshua conceded.
Mokou turned her attention back to the fire. “Anyway, how do they start again? Oh right. Once upon a time, there was a terrible princess who lived on the Moon.”
Joshua had readied himself to listen a great deal and speak very little, but already Mokou had made a point that he needed to have clarified. “I’m terribly sorry, but it sounded like you just said that there was a princess who lived on the Moon.”
“Yeah, that’s right.”
Joshua stared. “And you mean that literally.”
“Obviously.”
“There are people. People who live on the Moon.”
“Yes, lots.” Mokou was starting to sound a little impatient.
“Oh,” Joshua said, still staring. “So they’re aliens then.”
Mokou shrugged. “Well, so are you, and so am I, if you really want to get technical about things. But yes, that would be correct.” A beat passed, and then she said, “You seem perturbed.”
“I’m sorry, it’s just that Gensokyo took a long time to get used to. Now there’s aliens from the Moon.”
Mokou sighed. “Fuck, Josh. Get used to it! There is literally a bunch of snobby assholes who live on the fucking Moon! Like, they got a whole city up there and everything! How is that in any way weirder than anything that goes on down here?”
“Not by much,” Joshua admitted. “But even so. This is new.”
Mokou rolled her eyes. “They call themselves Lunarians.”
“Lunarians?”
“Yeah. Because they’re from the Moon.”
“Oh. Well, that’s…” Joshua struggled to put his disorganized thoughts into words. “…sort of basic.”
Mokou pressed her fingertips to her forehead. “We live next to the Youkai Forest, which is a forest full of youkai. To the northeast is the Youkai Mountain, which is a mountain full of, you guessed it, more youkai.”
“Okay, I get it,” Joshua sighed.
“And we’ve been dealing with assholes from the Human Village. Hey, try to guess what kind of place that is, and what most of its population is?”
Joshua held up his palms. “All right, all right. So magical people aren’t exactly the most creative when it comes to names.”
“Can I continue my story please?”
“Go ahead,” Joshua said, motioning to her. “I’m listening.”
Mokou turned her head and spat. “Right. So, once upon a freaking long time ago, there was this spoiled rotten twit of a princess up on the Moon. And she is just the worst. Like, okay, she was far from the firstborn so she’s not getting the throne, but she’s still royalty, so she lives in luxury and privilege, never wants for anything, and yet that’s not enough for her. So she decides that she wants to live forever.”
Joshua blinked. Wow, that was a lot of unexpected vitriol. “Oh. Uh, does she?”
“That’s what I said, isn’t it? I mean, the Lunarian royal family is the next best thing to immortal anyway. All this took place centuries ago, and her dad is still running things, but noooooo, that wasn’t enough for her. She wanted to be completely immortal. As if in, actually live forever instead of just a really long time. Recover from any injury, no matter how severe. And if anything did manage to off her, then…who cares? Her body would just rebuild itself, and she’d be good as new! If anything about her was good to begin with.”
“And it…worked?”
Mokou nodded. “She already had some kind of magical gift to sort of…I don’t know, freeze objects in a state of permanence. Like, if she used it on a vase or pot or whatever, then sure, you could smash it, you could chip it, you could grind it into dust, but it would just put itself back together piece by piece, heal all the cracks, and be exactly how it was. Forever. She just figured out a way to apply that power to people.”
“Um…”
“She was friends with the head scientist or whatever. And they managed to brew up a kind of potion from her power that you could drink. And hey presto! Immortal.”
“I guess there’s no point in asking if it worked.”
“If it didn’t, then her dad would have just executed her and saved us all a lot of trouble,” Mokou said with a derisive snort.
That gave Joshua a start. “Execute his own daughter?”
“We’re talking about a rich and arrogant king with like a double-digit number of kids,” Mokou said flatly. “Like, a high double-digit.”
“That’s…huh.” Joshua shook his head. “You know, there once was a time would I would find the story of Moon people turning themselves immortal to be a silly children’s tale, but now it just seems not the least bit implausible.”
“Right? But they didn’t like that for some reason, and gave the two of them the boot. So they went and hid in Japan.”
“How long ago?”
M: =tells him=
Joshua’s mouth fell open. “Mother of God.”
Mokou tossed a stick into her self-sustaining fire. “I doubt it. She never had kids, and even if she did, any offspring to pop out of her would be just as profane as she is.”
Joshua hesitated. As strange as Mokou’s story was, he felt that he had figured out where it was going, and one point in particular was making him uncomfortable. “Mokou, don’t talk of yourself like that. Regardless of what you might have done, that doesn’t make you-”
Mokou made a disgusted noise deep in her throat. “The hell? Josh! I’m not talking about me! I’m not the fucking Moon princess!”
“What? B-But I thought-”
“Good fucking gods, no!” Mokou slapped her palm across her forehead. “This isn’t my story yet, it’s just the background! I wasn’t even born when all that happened.”
“Oh.” Joshua winced with embarrassment. “Um, sorry for assuming.”
Mokou waved his apology off. “Whatever. So yeah, they got kicked off their rock and ended up on ours. And because they weren’t really the kind to think things through, they forgot to bother with the whole ‘laying low thing,’ it didn’t take long for word to get around that there’s a super-hot immortal Moon princess in town, and before they knew it she was the most eligible bachelorette in the land. Men were lining up outside her door, all seeking her hand in marriage.”
“Now this is really starting to sound like a fairytale,” Joshua remarked.
“Well, I’m sure she’s inspired a few of those.”
“Something tells me that you’re not exactly fond of this Moon princess.”
Mokou laughed at that. “What gave it away? The sound of absolutely contempt in my voice, or the way every single one of my muscles clenches tighter than a ferret’s sphincter whenever I mention her?
“Er, all of the above?”
A long silence fell between them. Mokou continued to stare into the fire, her body unmoving, all except for the fingers of her right hand, which clenched and unclenched over and over. “Yeah, I hate her,” she said at last. “Like, a lot.”
“Why?”
Again Mokou fell silent, and Joshua sat and waited.
So far Mokou’s tone while telling her story had been contemptuous, mocking, and irreverent. But when she finally started to speak again, her voice was soft, low, and contemplative. “Once upon a time, there was a little girl born to the prestigious Fujiwara family. Now, this girl loved her family very much. Her father was strong and kind, her mother sweet and gentle, her brothers loving and encouraging and great fun to be around. And her family’s wealth and influence meant that she wanted for very little.” Mokou took a deep breath, and it caught a little in her throat. “But this girl had a problem, one that cast a shadow over her happiness as she grew older. And that was that her family kept dying.”
Mokou stopped talking. Joshua wondered if he ought to say something, to inquire further. But no. This was her story, and he was going to let her tell it at her pace.
“The first to go was her mother,” Mokou said at last. “Thanks to a hereditary wasting disease, this girl watched her grow weaker and weaker every year, slowly breaking down until she couldn’t even leave her bed. Every second she was in constant pain, and could barely drink water without coughing up blood. And her father wasted away with his wife, but in spirit rather than body.”
The fire had started to change. Though it burned on still despite a lack of a fuel source, it was growing lower and darker, and it was producing far more smoke.
Smoke of what? Joshua wondered, but he felt it wise not to ask.
“The next was her brother,” Mokou continued. “You see, the girl’s family had a problem. An enemy. Another prestigious family was actively trying to destroy them?”
“Why?” Joshua had to ask.
Mokou waved off his question. “It doesn’t matter. Something stupid, from before even her father was born, and it just kept escalating like those things do, until it was like there wasn’t a time when they hadn’t been enemies. But for most of the time, it was just them trying to, you know, humiliate one another, sabotage each other’s business plans, maybe a surprise raid or two, nothing really out of the ordinary for that time.” She took another deep, shuddering breath. “And then one day they received a box, a box with no note or message or anything. And in it was her brother’s head.”
Joshua stared into the smoke so he wouldn’t have to see the look on Mokou’s face.
“Well, with one wife and one son down, that was pretty much half of her father’s family,” Mokou continued. “And since, you know, the disease that murdered her mother was hereditary, and only hit the women, she was next, and there was nothing she could do about it. Even before she became a woman, she could feel it growing inside her, like a hungry black pit deep inside her, just eating her from the inside-out. Soon it would be three of them gone, and with the Sonozikas pressing them harder and harder, who knew when her last brother would wake up with a knife in his heart or take in a mouthful of poison?”
Joshua started at that. “The Sonozikas? Wait, you mean-”
“The same,” Mokou said with a bitter laugh. “Yeah, here’s a spoiler: they ended up winning. They’re still around and running the Human Village, whereas the Fujiwara family is only around because its remaining member literally can’t die.” She shook her head. “Anyway, to move things along, the girl found out that there was someone very special living among them, a bonafide Princess from the fucking Moon, and an immortal one at that. Beautiful, powerful, forever young, and completely and utterly safe from things like disease and assassinations and slipping and cracking her head on the stones and having her guts ripped out, her brain flash-cooked, her head taken right off her shoulders, her entire body reduced to ash or sliced into tiny pieces and spread all the way across-”
“Mokou!” Joshua cried. “Please, I don’t need to know those details!”
Mokou laughed again. “Yeah, sorry. I guess you wouldn’t. Anyway, word got out that this princess was being courted by everything in Japan that had two legs and a functional penis, and there was supposed to be some kind of quest, a sort of wander the country collecting these rare treasures, and the one to bring them all back would win her hand. And the girl convinced her father to give it a shot.”
“Um…” Joshua frowned. “Ah, I’m sorry if this is out of line, but…”
“Why?” Mokou shrugged. “Well, I didn’t know better then. I just heard ‘immortal’ and ‘princess,’ and felt that if my father was to remarry, then it ought to be someone he wouldn’t worry about losing, you know? And I was kind of hoping that she would share her secret of immortality with him and my brother. Not that it ended up mattering, as he ended up coming home a year later, empty-handed and humiliated.”
“Oh.”
“The quest was a scam,” Mokou said flatly. “Pure and simple. A complete wild goose chase. Turns out, the princess already had all of those treasures locked away in her closet, and was just sending those men off just so they would leave her alone, without caring that she was also sending them into some of the most dangerous places in Japan. See, this was before Gensokyo took in all the gods and monsters and youkai and the like, so the country was a lot like Gensokyo is now, and most of those who went on this quest never came back. My father was one of the lucky ones to have survived. Too bad the journey destroyed his health and drained his wealth so that he had to sell off most of his land just to avoid total ruin. And he didn’t forget that it was me that told him to do it.”
Joshua had nothing to say to that at all.
“So yeah, total disaster,” Mokou said. “On the bright side, it got the Sonozikas off our back, seeing how they were the ones who bought most of those properties. I guess they felt that doing so meant that they won. Which, okay, it did.” She clicked her tongue. “Anyway, a couple years go by, and the girl’s just getting weaker and weaker. She tried to stave it off, but with her family’s wealth gone, they couldn’t afford the same treatments that kept her mother alive as long as they did, and even if they did, it wasn’t likely that her father would have bought them.”
“That’s terrible,” Joshua said softly. “To just let one’s own daughter waste away like that.”
“Whatever,” Mokou said. “But then they heard an interesting bit of news. Turns out that the Emperor was one of those seeking the Moon Princess’s hand, and he just plain refused her bullshit quest and wasn’t interested in taking no for an answer. So hey, good for him. But she said no anyway, and that made him angry. And I guess that she figured having the ruler of the country you’re trying to hide in would make one’s eternal life kind of difficult, she tried for making a kind of peace offering. She gifted him with the same potion that made her immortal in the first place.”
“Oh,” Joshua said. “Oh. Well, that’s quite the gift.”
“Maybe, but he didn’t think so, seeing how it just made him even more angry. So much so that he tried to destroy it.”
“Er…why?”
Mokou shrugged. “Fuck if I know. Maybe he thought it was a trick, maybe it’s because he was already an old man and the potion didn’t give you your youth back, so being stuck like that forever would wear off its novelty pretty fast. But anyway, even though he might have been smarter than the rest of her would-be fiancées, he was just as dramatic, because instead of just pouring it onto the ground and sending a bunch of his men to drag her back in chains, he decides to straight-up send it off in this grand caravan and have it thrown into a live volcano!”
Just when it seemed that Mokou’s story started to sound at least a little grounded in reality, it took another fantastical turn. “Okay,” Joshua said at last. “Why a volcano?”
“Fuck if I know!” Mokou said again with a dramatic gesture into the sky with both hands. “He up and died not long after, so I never got the chance to ask him. But whatever, you don’t pull a stunt like that without wanting people to know about it, so of course word reaches the girl that the secret of the Moon Princess’s immortality is headed across the land to be thrown into a fiery mountain. So she decided to steal it.”
“Right,” Joshua nodded. “Because of the disease.”
Mokou shook her head. “Nah, it wasn’t going to be for me. At that point I already resigned myself to death. But with my family half gone and the rest disgraced and me being dishonored in my father’s eyes, then fuck it, what did I have to lose? Maybe if I got that much for him, so that he could be immortal, or my remaining brother, or his new wife if he managed to get one, then maybe I’d be redeemed in his eyes. That, or I would die in the attempt, but honestly I didn’t care about that.”
“Well, obviously you succeeded,” Joshua remarked. “I mean, not in the way you were planning, but you did manage to steal the potion from the caravan.”
“No shit,” Mokou said, giving him a sidelong glance.
“How?” Joshua asked. “I mean, I imagine it would have been guarded.”
Mokou didn’t answer. She just stared long and hard into the fire, the look on her face completely blank.
“Mokou?”
Several more seconds stretched past, and when Mokou finally spoke, her voice was rough. “You don’t need to know that. Just know that things went sideways pretty badly, and by the end of it, the girl was lying in the road, potion in hand, while she bled into the dust.”
“Oh.” Joshua wondered exactly what had happened to make Mokou clam up like that, especially after having discussed several other things of a sensitive and personal nature.
“Well, this girl was now scared,” Mokou continued. “She knew she was to die soon, but for some reason the thought of dying now, before when the disease was to take her naturally, terrified her. And in her pain and panic she did something terrible.” A slow, thin smile spread across her face like a knife wound, one completely devoid of humor and joy. “She drank the potion herself.”
“Anyone else would have done the same,” Joshua said.
Mokou didn’t seem to have heard him. “It was only supposed to be a sip. Just the smallest of sips, not enough to turn her immortal, but enough to heal her hurts, maybe even burn the disease out of her! But the second the potion touched her tongue, she couldn’t stop! Three quick gulps, and it was gone!” She closed her eyes. “And then the pain started. It was like she was being immolated from the inside out. You see, the potion had not been designed with normal Humans in mind. The girl was not some long-lived Lunarian Royal, she was just a normal girl with a weak body, and it wasn’t strong enough to withstand the changes the potion was trying to bring upon her. Her hurts were healed, yes, and it did burn the illness right out of her, but everything else burned as well.”
To Joshua’s alarm, Mokou had begun to burn as well. It was small, but tiny, flickering flames had appeared on the back of her hands and her shoulders. She didn’t seem to notice though. Her clothes weren’t even browning.
“Her organs failed over and over, only to being forced back into working condition, only to fail again. Her bones and muscles dissolved, only to reform in their own soup. Her skin was sloughed right off of her, only to be replaced again and again. Blood poured from her like a river, but never seemed to run out.”
Now the fire was spreading up her arms. Joshua was torn between trusting Mokou’s claims of being fireproof and saying something to warn her. Certainly, everything she had said and done had given him every indication of her not having anything to fear from the flames, but that sort of thing was hard to recall when your friend is literally self-immolating right in front of your eyes. “It seemed like it would never end, that she was cursed to remain in that perpetual state of destruction and rebirth, writhing in agony on that dirt road forever.” Then, as the flame rose up to wreathe her head like an Angel’s halo, she turned to smile at Joshua. “And that is when it came to her.”
Joshua started. “What?”
“The Phoenix,” Mokou said. Her voice had something Joshua had never heard from her before: reverence. “The fire bird of the morning. At first she thought that she had imagined it, that it was just her own pain-addled mind conjuring up delusions, that the flame she was seeing was her own eyeballs boiling in their own juices. But then she heard it speak inside her head. It told her that she had taken something not meant for her, and she was unable to handle its power. That her imperfect body could not adapt and would never again be whole, unless she accepted its help.”
“Help?” Joshua swallowed and scooted a few feet from her. Mokou might be unharmed by the fire, but he had no such protection, and he was starting to feel the heat radiate off her body.
“It would bind itself to her,” Mokou said, still oblivious to the fact that she was very much on fire now. “You see, it was growing old. Phoenixes are creatures of rebirth. They are born, they grow old, and they die, incinerating themselves in their own flame. But from their own ashes they are born anew, young again. But it had done so too many times, and with every rebirth it lost a little more of itself. It was too weak to continue the cycle, just as the girl was too weak. But together, their respective, imperfect forms of immortality might stabilize one another. They might metamorphose into something whole.”
“So, you accepted?” Joshua said. He tried to make the question sound casual, but that was very difficult to do when the person you’re talking to was burning like a torch.
“Well, I was screaming in the throes of unbelievable agony, so I was exactly in a position to refuse,” Mokou responded. “But as I lay there suffering, it entered me. And then the pain really began. Its fire scorched me. And I don’t just mean my body, that was burnt up in seconds. I mean it scorched me to my now immortal soul, burning away every single drop of mortality and impermanence within me. Time ceased to have meaning. Seconds stretched into unbearable, indescribable years. And through it all, all I could do was wish for death, anything to make the pain stop.” She paused for a moment, and then the fires covering her changed, turning from scarlet to gold. “And then my body started to grow back. In the heart of that inferno, my bones forced themselves into existence, reforming and joining together. My organs regrew and reconnected, my meat and ligaments puffing up like tumors, and then skin crawled all over that horror, sealing it all inside. And unlike before, it wasn’t destroyed again.”
She paused again. In her silence, Joshua was finding it very hard not to stare at her, and it wasn’t just due to the absurd novelty of her being on fire.
Mokou had always been lovely, but Joshua had never thought of her in those terms. For one, until that very hour, he had always thought that he was old enough to be her father, but now he knew that the age difference was weighed far, far, far in the opposite direction, and to an absolutely ridiculous extent at that. For another, even if they had been around the same age, there had always been something that felt dangerous about Mokou, something beyond her rough nature and mysterious past, something that told her that she was someone to be kept at arms’ distance.
Joshua had of had always cared for her as a friend and a member of their strange family, and he knew that she loved the children as much as he did and would do anything to protect them, but he knew the look of someone who had stepped onto a bad path and walked it for a long time. He had seen that look many times back during his time with the Military, and when he had been in rehab. Hell, he had worn it himself for quite a while. And while he always did what he could to help those who had it to leave that path as he did, he knew when someone had a self-destructive nature, and Mokou most certainly did; he had seen that about her even before she had revealed just how thoroughly he had underestimated the extent of the damage.
But in that moment, as she sat there bathed in golden light, softly describing being transformed on both a physical and spiritual level, she was the most beautiful thing Joshua had ever seen. And not in any desirable or sexual way; she looked almost angelic, an ethereal being far beyond his comprehension that a lowly mortal like him had no business breathing the same air as.
Which, when one thought about it, was exactly what she was.
“It was the weirdest damn thing,” Mokou said. ‘I was lying there, naked in a dirt road, staring up at the sky. I could barely remember my own name or what had happened to me. The pain was gone, and yet it…wasn’t. I still felt the heat, but it didn’t hurt anymore. It was like hot coals had been sealed up in my stomach, but my stomach had been reinforced with steel, if that makes any sense. And I was changed, changed and made to never change again.”
Then she sighed, and the flames suddenly snuffed out all at once, both the ones covering her body and the burning sphere in the center of the circle, and she was just plain old Fujiwara no Mokou again, the prickly, yet well-meaning, cook of the Aoki Yume’s Children’s Home. “Anyway, that’s why I’m immortal. The end.”
Joshua was already reeling from everything that he had seen and heard over the last hour or so, but this completely knocked him off his gourd. “Wait, what?” he gawked. “But what happened next? Where’s the rest of the story? What did you do after that? What happened with your father, or the Sonozikas, or the Moon princess? What have you been doing all this time, and-”
“No.”
“No?”
Mokou stood up and brushed off her pants. “I told you why I’m immortal. I told you why I didn’t die, and that was more than I usually like to tell. Everything else, everything I’ve done since then, is my own damn business. So, the end.”
Joshua looked to the scorch mark in the ground and the smoke rising from it. He still had an endless bounty of questions, but now that he thought of it, Mokou was right. This was none of his business. Her story was obviously heartbreaking, painful, and horrifyingly long, and she had told as much as she felt comfortable telling.
To be truthful, Joshua felt like he was intruding just by having heard as much as he had. He had known that the mysterious young woman with the rough-around-the-edges personality that the kids had dragged in nearly dead (though he now supposed that she had actually been dead) from the snow had a dark past, but he had never imagined anything on this scale. His friend was literally one of those tragic monsters of legend, the kind who had started off as a simple Human only to be doomed to wander the earth forever due to one, avoidable mistake. She was of the same sort as the Wandering Jew, Stingy Jack, or even Cain himself. Who was he to demand anything from her?
Furthermore, how was he supposed to treat her now? Did they just go back to the way things were and never bring it up again? As tight-lipped as Mokou had suddenly become, Joshua knew that the rest of the story would reflect poorly on her. She had killed people, of that he had no doubt. She had probably killed a great many people, and a lot of them had probably been innocents, people who had been in the wrong place and the wrong time.
Furthermore, he knew that she had done other things. Her torture of those spiders had been cold, efficient, and spoke of a wealth of experience. The few bits she had dropped about the Moon Princess, wherever she was, were nothing short of horrific, and he was willing to bet that those talents had also been employed against those who couldn’t simply regenerate from death and dismemberment.
By any decent metric, Mokou was a monster, one comparable to Vlad the Impaler or Jack the Ripper.
And yet…
“Go ahead,” Mokou said.
“Eh?”
One arm crossing her chest to rest on the opposite elbow, Mokou rolled the wrist of the other. “Decent guy like you hearing a story like mine probably changes how you see me. And I think you’ve put together some of the pieces of the parts I didn’t tell you. So tell me, oh Man of God: have I earned my damnation? Is there something wrong with the universe that I’m never going to see it, that I’m going to be walking the earth long after Gensokyo is gone, after the Outside World had crumbled away, after the rest of humanity is extinct, that I will see the Heat Death of the universe and what lays beyond it? I know a thing or two about your God, as well as all the others, and most of them have some sort of endgame in mind for everything. But no matter what it is, I’m going to come through it, and no matter what perfect world comes out of it, it’ll have my soiled feet walking it.” She grinned. “Kind of seems a little unjust, don’t it?”
Joshua breathed in and out. Wow, this was so very much above his paygrade. He thought in it, letting the various parts of his mind and heart argue it out. As he did, Mokou stood and waited.
Joshua breathed in and out. Wow, this was so very much above his paygrade. He thought in it, letting the various parts of his mind and heart argue it out.
Unfortunately, nothing inside him could come up with a satisfactory response. This was so far above him that his mind felt crushed just by thinking about it. If he had learned that Mokou had been a murderer or something similar, then yes, that would probably change the complexion of their relationship, but not in any meaningful way, as he had known many killers and worse in his time.
“It’s okay,” Mokou said at last.
“Huh?”
“You don’t know what to make of me. You don’t know what to think.” She nodded solemnly. “It’s okay. I understand. It’s too much to take in all at once.”
Joshua stared down at the ground. “Mokou, I-”
“I’m a monster,” Mokou said. “The kind they make stories of, one as dark and evil to ever wander the black corners of the world. I’ve always known that. But I want you to understand something, Josh. Even if you end up hating me, I’m still your monster. Yours, the kids, Satoko’s, Haruna’s, Shion’s, Haruhi’s, all of you. I’m on your side, and I swear if anything tries to hurt any one of you again, then they have to go through me first. And they’ll find that a lot more difficult than they bargained for.”
It was a nice sentiment, but Joshua was still unable to wrap his head around the situation. “Okay,” he said. “But why?”
Mokou quirked an eyebrow. “Why what?”
“Why…Why do you care? Why do you care so much about these kids? Why do you care about us? It just doesn’t make any sense!”
“Ouch, man. That hurts.” Mokou stuck her hands in her pockets and rocked back and forth on her heels. “And say what you want about me, but I’ve never purposefully gone after anyone innocent, especially not kids. That’s a level of evil that I always swore I’d never fall to. Simple, isn’t it?”
“No, it’s not!” Joshua said, wringing his hands in agitation.
“Why not?”
“I…” In his struggles to articulate his thoughts, Joshua suddenly recalled a terrible story his platoon captain used to tell, a story that Joshua had always found incredibly troubling, mainly because he knew it was true. “Okay, you told your story to make your point, so here’s one to make mine: once upon a time, there was a soldier walking through a valley where the enemy had destroyed a village, and he find the body of a little girl lying on the side of the road, run through with a sword.
“Now this soldier feels like someone had punched him right in the gut, and he falls to his knees and takes the girl’s body in his arms as he cries. ‘Why, God? Why would you let something so terrible happen to such a beautiful child?’
“But the soldier still has a mission to do, and there is no time for burials, so he leaves the girl and continues on his way. Soon he finds two more dead little girls, their heads cut off, and he stops and starts weeping again, condemning the cruelness of the world.
“Soon he finds two dead little boys and three dead little girls, and he again cries for them, but he doesn’t stop. A few minutes later he comes across a full dozen dead children, and though he shakes his head at the terrible sight, he neither stops nor cries.
“And finally, before he’s left the valley, he comes across an entire elementary school, all of the children executed, their bodies just left for the flies. And he barely even looks at them before continuing on his way.”
“Damn,” Mokou said after he was done. “And I thought my story was gruesome. You trying to one-up me here or something?”
Joshua slowly breathed out. “My point is, you’ve lived hundreds upon hundreds of years. You’ve seen so much dead: men, women, and children. You’ve also caused quite a bit of it too. Normal people like us, we must be like mayflies compared you to, gone in a blink of an eye. So why do these kids matter so much, when by your standards they’ll be gone before you notice.”
At this, Mokou’s face turned serious, all hints of wryness falling away. “Good question,” she said. “Really good question. And I guess…Okay, look: I may be a monster, but the two years I’ve spent here with you guys, cooking for you, working with you, helping you, playing with the kids and everything is the first time for as long as I can remember that I felt like…like something other than a monster. Does that make sense.”
Joshua stared up at her. Then he slowly nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, I guess it does.”
“Good,” Mokou said. “So at least we know where we stand. But for now-”
Suddenly some kind of clamor was being raised over at the house. Joshua heard people shouting and running, and then Shion started calling to them from the porch.
“Hey!” she yelled. “You two stop slouching about and get over here! The kids are waking up!”
Joshua and Mokou exchanged looks of surprise. Then the two bolted toward the house.
“Kids!”
Rumia and Kohta started at the sudden exclamation. They looked up to see Miss Satoko standing in the door of the sick room, her crease-lined face lighting up and her eyes wet with tears.
“Oh, thank the gods, you’re all right!” Miss Satoko practically fell to her knees in front of the children and threw her arms around Rumia and Kohta both. A little taken back by the sudden display of affection, Rumia glanced uncertainly at Kohta from over Miss Satoko’s shoulder, who shot her the same look back. Then the two gingerly wrapped their arms around the woman in return.
“I was…I was so afraid…” Miss Satoko whispered. “When you disappeared, I thought I would never…” Then she drew back and smiled at the two. “But you’re here.” She cupped their faces with her hands. “You’re all right.”
Rumia flinched at the touch. For some reason, her palm just felt way too warm. “I’m…we’re…”
“Shhh.” Miss Satoko pressed a finger to Rumia’s lips. It hurt. “It’s okay. We can talk later.” She leaned forward to kiss the top of Rumia’s forehead. “Just rest for now. It’s enough to know you’re alive.”
Rumia instinctively drew back from the kiss, but stopped herself. What was she doing? Miss Satoko kissed their foreheads all the time! Still, it felt…wrong this time. Her lips felt hot, like a branding iron was being pressed against her brow. Still, she gritted her teeth and bore it.
“Miss Satoko?” Kohta said. His voice still sounded weirdly creaky and hollow. “W-What about…” He coughed. “What about the others? They won’t wake up.”
“Don’t worry, they’re fine,” Miss Satoko said. “It’s just that…” She made a face. “Well, the spiders stung them, you see. They still need to get it out of their systems. But they should be waking up soon.”
Rumia cast a dubious look over to Kana, who was still breathing shallowly.
“Okay, but how did we get…home?” Kohta said. “Because I don’t…”
Miss Satoko stroked his hair. “Mr. Joshua and Miss Mokou found you in the forest,” she said. “They said you were lying unconscious, like you had fallen asleep, and they carried you back.”
“Miss Mokou’s back?” Rumia whispered. It still hurt a little to talk.
Miss Satoko nodded. “She got back right after you two went off. As soon as she found out what happened she went right after you.”
“Oh.” Rumia’s face twisted up as she tried to put all of her scattered thoughts in order. “Uh, are we…in trouble?”
That made Miss Satoko laugh a little. “No, Rumia. I mean, normally, yes you would be, because what you did was very foolish and dangerous. But I think what you went through was more than enough punishment. I’m just glad you’re still alive.”
“Alive,” Kohta whispered. He suddenly sat straight up. “Alive! Miss Satoko. It’s Eiko! She-”
The smile vanished from Miss Satoko’s face, to be replaced with naked pain. “I know, I know,” she said hoarsely. “Mokou told me everything.”
“What?”
“Miss Mokou and Mr. Joshua…found her too. They brought her home as well.”
“Brought her…you mean her body?”
Miss Satoko swallowed and nodded. “Yes.”
“But…the spiders! They would’ve-”
“The spiders won’t be a problem anymore.”
Rumia, Kohta, and Miss Satoko all looked to the door. Miss Mokou was there, leaning against the doorpost with her hands in her pockets.
“Wh-What?” Rumia said.
“You don’t have to worry about the spiders,” Miss Mokou said. “I took care of them.”
“Mokou,” Miss Satoko said. “Maybe this had better-”
“Can we have a few moments?” Miss Mokou said.
“I don’t think-”
“I won’t be long. Just need to ask a few questions.”
“It’s okay,” Rumia told Miss Satoko. “I’d like to talk to her.”
“Me too,” Kohta said.
Miss Satoko hesitated, but then nodded. “Okay. Don’t take too long.” She kissed them both again. Rumia winced when Miss Satoko’s lips touched her forehead
She passed by Miss Mokou, stopped, and laid a hand on the other woman’s shoulder. Miss Mokou gave her fingers a brief squeeze before she left.
“Well,” Miss Mokou said as she entered the room and closed the door, leaving them alone with her. “Sure am glad you two are up and about at least. Feel all right?”
“No,” Rumia said.
“Didn’t think so.” Miss Mokou sat in front of them, legs folded and hands on her knees. “Apparently you two snuck out the moment you could. Didn’t wait for any grown-ups at all, just plunged into the forest yourselves, right?”
“Yes,” Kohta said.
“Heh. Well, that was fucking stupid, but based on what I’ve learned, if you hadn’t, someone else would’ve probably died too. So, you know, good job.”
Rumia hesitated, and then asked. “M-Miss Mokou. The…spiders.”
“What about them?”
“Did you really, you know…”
Miss Mokou nodded. “I did. Your little firework show told me pretty plain where to find them. Found the four of them trying to put out the fires with Eiko’s body still on the table. That told me enough.”
“But…they’re youkai. They’ll come back.”
“No, they won’t,” Mokou said with absolute surety. “Youkai can come back from most things, but there are a few kinds of death that keep them. And I so happen to know at least one of them.”
Rumia felt a chill sweep up her back. “What did you do to them?”
A spark flickered in the dark pupils of Mokou’s maroon eyes. “I burned them alive.” She rotated her right wrist around on her knee, moving the palm upward. A hovering ball of flame suddenly flashed into existence over her hand. “But first I broke them. Slowly. And with great deliberation. I broke them, I hurt them, I made them scream, and after they had told me everything I wanted to know, I set a fire deep inside them that roasted them until their flesh had crisped and their fat melted and even their bones turned to ash.” She closed her fingers shut, snuffing out the flame. “Isn’t as good stopping them from taking you in the first place, but at the very least I made their meal more expensive than they were willing to pay.”
“Good,” rasped a weak-sounding voice.
Rumia turned to see Haruko struggling to sit up. Her former nemesis looked pretty bad, not as bad as Kana, but she was still gaunt and haggard. Her long dark hair, usually so carefully brushed and cleaned, was a nightmare of oily knotted strands that hung in clumps around her face.
“Good,” Haruko said again. “They deserve it.”
“How long have you been awake?” Kohta asked.
Haruko coughed from deep inside her chest. “Few minutes,” she muttered. “When Miss Satoko was still here.” She looked up at Miss Mokou. “You brought Eiko back home, right?”
Miss Mokou nodded. “Me and Joshua did. We were just waiting for you to wake up before we put her to rest.”
Tears shown in Haruko’s eyes. She blinked several times, sniffed, and wiped her eyes with her arm. “Th-Thank you.”
A heavy silence passed between them. Then Miss Mokou sighed and said, “But that wasn’t the only reason I was waiting for you to wake up. See, I learned most of what there is to know about your rescue from the spiders, but not what happened after. They said that they stopped following you when you went into a place called the bone grove, which had something called the black circle. That’s where I found you, all of you. You were all lying lifeless just outside the bone grove. What happened?”
“The…bone grove?” Rumia repeated.
“Yes. A place filled with black trees that had been turned to stone, that had skeletons fused into their trunks. And its center had this circle of black sand.” Miss Mokou shook her head. “Damn. I thought I had seen every ugly corner of Gensokyo, but that was a new one, even for me. Even so, nothing happened the whole time I was in there. I tried setting the trees on fire, but they wouldn’t burn. I tried melting the sand, but it just swallowed up my fire like it was nothing, and that does not happen. But I felt like there was something in there, something that was deliberately locking me out. So I need to know what happened to you all in there.”
“Nothing,” Rumia, Kohta, and Haruko all said in unison.
Miss Mokou narrowed her eyes. “Well. That response was…quick. And unanimous. And obviously not true.”
“Nothing happened!” Haruko insisted.
“Oh, yeah? So, what, you just fell unconscious in the middle of the Youkai Forest for several minutes without anything picking you off? The spider chasing you just up and decided to leave you there for no reason?”
“Yes!” Rumia said crossly. Why couldn’t Miss Mokou just drop it? It wasn’t any of her business!
“Huh,” Miss Mokou said. “I see.”
Then, moving quicker than a striking snake, she reached up with both hands to grip Rumia and Kohta by the chins.
Rumia tried to recoil, but the fingers holding onto her jaw were too strong. And if the touch of Miss Satoko’s hand had been uncomfortably warm, Miss Mokou’s felt hotter than a cattle brand. It was searing into her skin, so much so that she could practically smell her own flesh sizzling.
“STOP IT!” Kohta screamed.
“LET US GO!” Rumia agreed. Haruko lunged forward and shoved Miss Mokou in the chest.
Miss Mokou didn’t budge, but she did raise a single eyebrow. “Well,” she said. “That answers that.”
Then she let them go.
The three of them scrambled away from her, putting as much distance between them and Miss Mokou. “What do you think you’re doing?” Kohta demanded. “Don’t touch us!”
Miss Mokou said nothing. She just calmly looked from one face to the other, her narrowed eyes piercing into theirs.
Then the doorknob started rattling. “Mokou?” Miss Satoko said from the other side. “Mokou, what was that? What are you doing?”
“Huh,” Miss Mokou said.
“Open the door! Mokou?”
Miss Mokou stood up. “Well, that’s everything I need to know. You three get some rest. Awake or not, you’re definitely not fully recovered.”
“Yes, we are!” Haruko protested. “We’re fine!”
“Uh-huh. Sure you are.” Miss Mokou walked over to the door and opened it, revealing not only Miss Satoko, but the rest of the grown-ups as well, all crowded outside the door.
Without saying anything, Mokou left the room and shut the door, leaving the six of them alone.
“Mokou, what the hell was that?” Shion hissed. “What were you doing to them?”
“Exactly,” Satoko said, a cold look in her eyes. “You have five seconds to explain why they were screaming before I-”
Mokou held up a finger, silencing them. “No,” she said. “Not here. Haruna’s room. Now.”
Haruna folded her arms. “Kid, you better explain yourself right now.”
“Not. Here,” Mokou repeated. “Head to Haruna’s room and lock the door.”
“Mokou, you were hurting them!” Joshua said. “They were screaming, and-”
Mokou then noticed something. She held up a palm, silencing him, as she turned her attention over to the stairs.
Practically every child in the orphanage not currently in the sick room were clustered around the top steps, staring intently at them.
“OUTSIDE!” Mokou roared.
The kids cleared out faster than she had ever seen them do. She listened as they ran, hopped, and in some cases tripped their way downstairs and out the front door.
When the thumping stopped and the door slammed shut, she turned to the rest of the orphanage’s staff.
“Okay, so now can we go to Haruna’s room so I can explain why we are now all in very real danger?” she said.
That did it. Their looks of confusion and anger turned to ones of confusion and fear. “Okay,” Haruna said. “But why my room? Why not yours?”
“Because my window still has a big hole in it from my hasty exit earlier, and yours has the thickest walls.”
“Well, I’m a light sleeper,” Haruna said, and a bit indignantly at that. “And there’s always some child walking the halls every night.”
“Right, but this isn’t something I want anyone listening in on, so if we could…” Mokou motioned down the hall with both hands.
The six of them quietly filed through the hall and into Haruna’s room. It was a very nice place for such a rough-looking woman, decorated with bright colors and several chalk drawings she had done herself.
“All right,” Satoko said once Haruna had locked the door. “We’re here. Now tell me what you did to them, and maybe I’ll consider not expelling you right now.”
“I grabbed their chins to get a good look at their eyes,” Mokou said. She pinched her own jaw between her thumb and index finger as demonstration. “Like this.”
“That’s it?” Shion said. “But they sounded like you were burning them!”
“That’s because that’s how it felt. Satoko, did you notice how they flinched when you kissed them?”
Satoko stared blankly at her. “Did they?”
“They did. In fact, I’d say they were scared of being touched at all.
“Mokou, we’re begging you,” Shion said. “Say things that make sense!”
Mokou sighed. Oh well, she was in for it already. “Fine. I already told Satoko and Joshua all this, so look them up for the details, but the long and short of it, I’m immortal.”
Haruhi made noise that wasn’t quite a gasp and not quite a hiccup, but was very similar to both.
“Yeah, so to just preemptively answer your questions, no, I’m not a youkai,” Mokou said. “I’m Human, but several hundred years ago I drank a magic potion that made so I’m going to live forever. And I later got super-charged with a whole lot of fire, so that’s what that is all about. But anyway, I’ve been around a long time, and know how to recognize certain things-”
“Excuse me?” Haruhi squeaked. “Uh, I know this is very important, but can we go back to the part where you’re immortal and apparently hundreds of years old?”
Shion shrugged. “Makes sense to me.”
“Well, yeah,” Haruna said. “I mean, it’s obvious, isn’t it?”
“You two knew?” Haruhi said.
“Well, no, but I figured it had to be something like that,” Shion said.
“I did,” Haruna said.
“You did?” Mokou said.
“Sure. I mean, I’ve been hearing stories about the Daughter of the Phoenix my whole life, one that’s supposed to be wandering the Bamboo Forest of the Lost. Then all of a sudden the kids drag in a frozen corpse that is all sorts of dead, except no it’s breathing again in minutes, and all of a sudden those stories stop.” Haruna shrugged. “All in all, it wasn’t hard to put together.”
“Huh,” Mokou said thoughtfully. “Well, when you put it like that…”
Haruhi held up her hands and stomped off to a nearby chair. “I need to sit down.”
“So…you’re really that old, huh?” Shion asked.
“Yeah,” Mokou said. “I’ve been around basically forever, and probably will still be around after everything’s gone.”
Shion thoughtfully rubbed her chin. “How much of forever are we talking? Like, since the beginning of time, or…”
“Oh, no,” Mokou snickered. “I was exaggerating. But about a hundred years or so before Gensokyo was created.”
Haruhi jolted in her chair. “You were born before Gensokyo was created?!”
“Yeah, and let me tell you, that was a hell of a news story.”
“A-And you told…” Haruhi pressed a palm to her forehead. “Okay, I get why you told Satoko, but why Joshua? I mean, no offense, Josh. I didn’t mean it like that.”
“None taken,” Joshua said. “And, well, I just, you know, asked her.”
Haruhi stared at him for a good long time before nodding. “Yeah, that makes sense.”
Satoko sighed. “Well, this is all very fascinating, but it’s distracting from the main point. Mokou, continue.”
“Right,” Mokou said. “So, I’ve been around, I’ve seen and done a lot of things, and I’ve learned to recognize certain things as well.”
“Things like what?” Haruna asked.
Mokou frowned. “Now, I only got a short look at them, but it was enough that I’d bet every single one of my remaining centuries that those kids found…something in the bone grove, something that left its mark on them.”
“What is the bone grove?” Shion asked. “Do you even know anything about it?”
Mokou shook her head. “Never even heard of it until now, which bothers me. I mean, sure, I’ve never really been the one to go digging up any of Gensokyo’s endless mysteries, but something that big really sounds like something I should have at least heard of. The spiders said that it’s a place that nobody goes to, that everyone in the forest just avoids and doesn’t talk about. Can’t say that I blame them.”
“The spiders,” Satoko repeated. “That you tortured.”
“Yeah, those are the ones. But anyway, even if I’ve never heard of this particular batch of creepy, it’s clear to me that even though I didn’t find anything specific in it, those kids did. And they took a piece of it with them.”
Satoko swallowed. “What is that even supposed to mean? What did it do to them?”
“Exactly what I said. Whatever it is, they got a piece of it inside them, and it’s influencing them somehow.”
Joshua inhaled sharply. “Wait, are you telling me that they’re possessed?”
“Hell if I know,” Mokou said. “Could be, but I don’t think so. They seemed mostly normal until I tried to talk to them about the bone grove, which is when they got weirdly hostile. And they didn’t freak out until I touched them. So I’m thinking that it’s just, you know, influencing them.”
“Is it dangerous?” Shion asked.
“Undoubtedly,” Mokou said with a nod.
Everyone fell silent as they all digested her answer. Then Shion said, “So, what do we do about it?”
Mokou thought on that. “In the long term? Not sure. But for now, keep them together in the sick room and away from the rest of the kids. Don’t let anyone go in there, and don’t let them leave, not until we learn more about what it is and what it’s doing to them.”
“No!” Satoko cried. “Are you out of your mind? I’m not going to make them prisoners in their own home!”
Mokou had been expecting that kind of reaction, and while it was understandable, this wasn’t the time to err on the side of kindness. “Would you rather one of the other kids end up dead? We already lost Eiko. You wanna risk someone else?”
“What about the funeral?” Haruhi said softly. “We put off laying Eiko to rest so they could be there. Haruko and Hayate were her friends. Are we going to keep them locked up during that?”
“Probably.”
“No,” Satoko repeated. “Absolutely not. Mokou, you go too far!”
Mokou gave a nonchalant shrug with one shoulder. “Someone has to.”
“She’s right,” Joshua said to her. “Satoko, I mean. This is just cruel. They’re already isolated from the rest of the Human community, and now you want to isolate them further?”
“If I gotta,” Mokou said. “Look, I’m not saying lock them up for life. I’ll go get the Hakurei shrine maiden. She’s an expert in this sort of thing. Hell, I’ll scare up Yukari Yakumo if I have to.”
That got a reaction from the others, almost as much as the reveal about her immortality did. “Yukari Yakumo!” Haruhi gasped. “You know Yukari Yakumo?”
“Not personally,” Mokou said. “But it’s a kind of ‘know people who know her’ sort of thing. Anyway, I’m pretty sure I can scare her down if I have to.”
“If you want to bring her into this, then do so,” Satoko said. “Bring anyone you think can help. But I am not locking them up, and they are not missing the funeral.”
Mokou scowled. “Bad idea, Satoko. When a kid gets sick, we keep them away from the others, don’t we?”
“It’s not the same thing!”
“Satoko, I think she’s right,” Haruna said in a low voice.
Satoko gaped at the older woman. For her part, Haruna merely folded her arms. “If those kids have been touched by something evil, then it’s our responsibility to do what we can to keep everyone safe. I know it sounds cruel, but we’re on a knife’s edge already. We can’t afford to take risks.”
“But that’s what Skinner and Sonozika are doing, isn’t it?” Satoko said. “Saying that we’re infected with evil to keep us isolated from everyone else? How are we any different if we do this?”
“Because number one, they’re just doing it because they’re hateful bigots,” Mokou said. “We actually have proof that something’s wrong. And number two, we intend to help the kids. They’re not.”
Satoko still looked unconvinced. “That’s not good enough, Mokou. After everything they’ve been through, I’m not going to separate them from their friends. I’m not going to treat them like monsters!”
“Satoko, it ain’t forever,” Haruna said, laying a meaty hand on the taller woman’s shoulder. “Mokou knows people that can help, right? Powerful people who specialize in this kind of crap. So we just keep them by themselves as a precaution until these people show up to take a look at things. Then they’ll fix the kids right up, and everything will go back to normal.”
Satoko looked hurt by Haruna’s words. “Haruna, you can’t be taking her side! You’ve helped raise these children even longer than I have! You know how close they are with one another! I mean, Rumia and Kohta have been fighting with Haruko, Hayate, and Eiko for as long as I can remember, and they still risked their lives to save them!”
“Think, Satoko! Think with your head! The safety of the children come first! Of course we’ll do everything we can to ensure that they’re okay, but until then, we need to be smart!”
“But-”
“What if whatever it is takes control of them when they’re asleep?” Mokou demanded. “I’ve seen things like that happen before. What if we wake up to find everyone’s throats slit? Or the house set on fire. Or-”
“Stop, Mokou! Just stop talking!”
Mokou’s gaze was like steel. “You know I’m right.”
“I…” Satoko’s eyes welled up with tears. “Fine then! If you think it’s so important, then fine! But only as long as it takes to get them help, and they are not missing the funeral!”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Mokou said. “We still don’t-”
“They’re going to be there, and that’s final! And speaking of which, seeing how you’re so good with fire, you can handle the cremation. Immediately.”
Mokou sighed. “Fine. And if they must be there, then fine. But at the very least keep them apart from the others.”
Satoko bit her lower lip. “How quickly can you get the Hakurei shrine maiden here?”
“Well, I’d have to find her again,” Mokou said after thinking on it. “But I don’t like the thought of leaving, not after what happened last time. I suppose I could send someone else to look for her.”
“Who?” Joshua said.
Tewi Inaba looked down at the list of instructions Mokou had given her, and then up again at the tall Human who had given it to her. “You serious with this?”
“Look, we’ve had enough shit go down here, so I can’t afford to leave them unprotected,” Mokou said. “And I’m a little short in contacts that might actually find her. So yes, I am serious with this.”
“Right,” Tewi sighed. “You know, we haven’t had that crust bitch poke her killjoy ass in our forest ever since you left. It’s been kind of nice. And now you just want us to go looking for her?”
“Tewi,” Mokou said, warning in her tone.
“Fine, fine, I’ll find her,” Tewi said as she held up her palms in defeat. “But you owe me.”
“Put it on my tab,” Mokou said. “I mean, I’ve got nothing but time to settle up.”
Me tired.
Until next time, everyone.
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namjooncharms · 5 years
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Shelter (3)
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supernatural!bts x  ( fem ) ghost seeing!reader. ( supernatural x soulmate au )
part 1, part 2
description: it’s not easy being in a world where the dead surround you. even trying to be as normal as the next person is hard when ghosts come to you with their issues, but sometimes these ghosts lead you to your fate.
Bold: speaking in Korean
Italics: ghosts speaking.
this is based off the kdrama masters sun and a little of goblin
N: the boys will eventually talk more about their lives as BTS but for this chapter they won’t.  
 you had stopped running, your hand hitting your chest as if it were going to work on getting your heartbeat to steady and your lungs to stop burning. you wet your lips and you follow the ghosts directions, walking around corners until you eventually come to a stop, the man you had been chasing has a knife held tightly in his hand and you stare blankly for a few moments until you realise he’s pointing it at an older woman, who’s sobbing and rubbing her hands. it confused you, what was she doing? 
you stepped closer, seeing now that she wasn’t alone. the man from before was standing in front of her, weapon in hand as she sobbed and begged him. you moved slowly, quietly or as quietly as you could but as you go to approach a hand grabs the back of your hoodie and hauls you back into their broad chest, the ghost has gone again and a hand clamps down over your mouth. you struggle but the voice suddenly soothes you. “i.. i promise i’m not going to hurt you.” he whispered and you roll your head, one of seven, the first one you’d met had taken a hold of you. “i want to help.” 
you can see it in his eyes, he’s pleading. “lemmph” your voice muffled against his hand. “please don’t get angry with me when i let you go, i’m sorry. i just want to help.” he’s still pleading with you, and you nod your head. you don’t surprisingly feel angry, only... warmth? he let you go and stepped back, and you punch his arm. “i said don’t follow me!” you hiss quietly. “you said you wouldn’t get angry with me!” he retorted. “i-i’m.. i’m not.. but look this is complicated okay? i need to do this.” 
jungkook stared at you, the way your eyes met. the way you held yourself, despite that twisting sadness within you that he could FEEL, that he related too. “let me help.” he breathed. you stare back at him, unsure but the look on his face, those doe eyes wordlessly begging you. “ugh, fine. but you do what i say!” jungkook’s lips twitched into a smile. you had somewhat let him in, he could work with that. the others would be proud of him. 
“okay look. this guy is a murderer, you need to be careful.” you tell him and he raises his eyebrows. “what about you?” he asked quietly and you scowl. “look i’ve dealt with a shit ton worse than this, i’ll be fine.” you don’t give him much time to retaliate before you’re moving away from him towards the man who’s frantic and the woman is in hysterics. he was shouting in korean. jungkook had attempted to gain your attention but you were far too focused on doing this. his eyes almost bulged out and his heart almost dropped straight out of his ass when you rushed at the man holding the weapon. 
“get her out of here!” you called and jungkook hesitated but he was quick, he could do this. you and the man had toppled over. once the woman had been removed from the scene safely placed elsewhere, jungkook had rushed back into where you had been, the man tring to use the weapon against you, trying to press it down and the younger rushed over and he kicked him straight in the ribs to which he toppled off you and landed on his back. 
jungkook reached down and pulled you up and into him, you were a little breathless and by now you looked absolutely exhausted. “are you okay?” he asked you and you nodded, without thinking about it you had leaned completely into him your forehead pressed against his chest. his hand came up and into your hair, you were with him. you were allowing him to hold you. you pulled back a little just in time to see the man running at jungkook. the weapon out and you shrieked, a sense of protectiveness and fear running through you and you pulled him behind you. 
his eyes wide as you grabbed the sharp end of the weapon with your hands, not quite feeling the deep slices on both. the feeling you had felt was now running through jungkook and he moved quickly the man being punched and knocked out. he whirled you around and pulled your palms to him so he could see. “why did you do that?” he asked and you, that sense of fear running through you again, but you smiled gently as you could and moved your hands from his grasp. “i’m fine. you’re not hurt right?” you asked. 
sirens could be heard and he looked down at you. “did you.. “ he began and you nodded. “yeah, i’m always trying to be at least one step ahead.” pride washed over him but he pointed as he could hear the sirens closing in. “i should go out there, the cops can’t see me.” he breathed and he touched your face with the palm of his hand, mesmerising you almost immediately but you kept repeating “get a grip, get a grip, get a grip.” to yourself as he headed out. 
                                                   --------------------
jungkook had waited for you out of sight, this would be all over the news if he’d been seen. when you walked out of the barn, after having watched the man who had confessed to the murder being taken away, with your hands bandaged you looked up surprised to see he was still there. “... hey.” you said and he smiled at you. “hi.” he breathed, you were so close he could smell you. “can i walk you home?” he asked and you hesitated. “i don’t think that’s a good idea.” you say and the look on his face melts you. “okay, okay, jesus. you can walk me home just.. i don’t know don’t do that face.” it hurts my chest. 
you’d given him directions to walk you with and when you almost tripped over and he’d caught you, he didn’t give much option before you were on his back, your arms wrapped gently around his neck.  before long you relaxed and he glanced at your face every now and then as he walked, your head lolling against his shoulder. you’d actually A L L O W E D him to do this and out of nowhere you’d crashed out, mumbling about how you were safe. because he made the ghosts go away. he should find that strange but after all these years of searching for you, he didn’t think it was weird. he’d heard of people who could see ghosts. but for him to be able to make them vanish? it was odd. that was the only odd thing. 
he walked in the direction that you’d told him to go and eventually he’d ended up at your apartment. he adjusted you on his back, entering the apartment through the key that had been in your pocket. once you were tucked into the bed, jungkook looked at you, briefly before he looked around. confused he moved towards the drawing that was pinned to the wall, there was seven figures surrounded by a flower. was that... the flowers on their album covers? 
bringing out his phone he took a picture of it before tucking it away and he looked back down at you, your eyebrows creased and a frown on your face. he moved back over to you and he took the bracelet you’d complimented earlier when the man had been arrested. lifting your arm he gently slid it onto your wrist. picking up your notepad, he put his number on it. please, call or text me. JK. 
he admired you for a moment more before he left and went home, the moment he’d entered the building and into the dorm he was bombarded. “jungkook-ah!” a voice shouted and he looked up, he smiled seeing namjoon and jimin. yoongi, hoseok, jin and taehyung trailing behind them.  “hi.” he waved softly and they stopped in front of him. “we’ve been all over looking for you, what the hell were you thinking? are you okay? did you get hurt? what happened? where were you? why didn’t you answer our calls?” jimin’s voice was quick, but soft. he could never be angry at jungkook for more than half an hour. but namjoon stepped in to speak, cuffing the back of jungkook’s head gently. with his hand. “what the hell were you thinking?!” namjoon demanded.
“sorry. no i’m not hurt,  i’m okay, and i wanted to make sure she was okay.” jungkook scratched the back of his neck. before anybody could say anything else his phone, beeped twice. alerting him of a message and he pulled it out, a bright smile coming to his face. “it’s her.” 
   thank you, “JK”,                          Y/N. 
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mnyg1800com · 6 years
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yandere!mafia boss bts reaction to their s/o escaping
*req. by atricksterwithwings* 
thank you for the request!!! (spoiler, they all find you yerr((also these are so long im sorry also also sorry for any typos i didn’t proofread this oof)
kim seokjin:
It was a long day. He had to dispose of many of his enemies today and he wanted nothing more than to stay at home and be pampered by you. Usually, it would be the other way around, but he knew you would understand him and how stressed he was feeling. He sent you a text saying ‘ill be home in 10, love you!’ When he arrived at his large house, he dropped his jacket onto a rack and commanded for the servants to make a dinner for the two of you, but when he commanded them he could see the look of fear in their eyes before nodding and disappearing into the kitchen. 
However, when he entered your shared, usually, clean room he saw disaster. He saw the sheets were thrown over the bed and the closest were open, along with the window which let the cool air blow in. Jin quickly pieced the clues together and fell onto his knees, you left him. He simply kneeled on the bedroom floor, trying to wake himself up from the trance. A light hand tapped his shoulder and he thought it was you as he whipped his head around quickly only to be greeted with a servant instead. 
“Sir, your dinner,” they weakly muttered, keeping their head down. 
“I don’t need dinner, not until Y/n comes back!” Jin exclaimed, standing up and bolting outside the room. But when he passed by the kitchen, he saw only one dinner plate. They knew you had left, why else would they place only one dinner plate at the table. Pushing those thoughts away, for now, Jin rushed to the door where he got his car keys. He kept telling himself to calm down and talk to all of his connections, anyway who could help him find you. 
With a few texts, he got screenshots of you entering a hotel just down the street. Of course, he would find you, he would always find you no matter how hard you tried to run. He sneaked into the hotel, not wanting to draw attention and only wanting yours at the moment, you mattered now and he didn’t need to be questioned by anyone. When he was successfully int he building, he knocked on your door and while he waited he cursed himself for not bringing flowers or a gift. 
But when you did open the door he ignored your shocked eyes and brought you into a hug, whispering how much of an idiot he was for letting you leave. He began to cry as you could only to try to fight a way out of his grasp, but it was useless. Jin pulled way to look at you with teary eyes, breathing heavily from both his sobs and his frantic movements to see you again. 
“I could’ve lost you forever, thank god I found you!* continues to sob and hold you in his arms*” 
“We have to get you home, and this time I will make sure you are safely guarded and watched over at all times so this won’t ever happen again. I can’t believe I let you get away from me, I’ll make sure you feel safe enough to stay this time Y/n. I promise!” 
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min yoongi:
Since the moment Yoongi woke up without you by his side he was already in a bad mood. You warned him the night before that you were going to leave early for an important meeting and he scowled at the thought of you not being with him. So with a heavy heart, he got ready for his darker life and had to carry out during his day knowing you were somewhere else. however, the day seemed to get progressively worse with each waking second. The trade deal that was so important for him was suddenly canceled when the opposing boss shot one of his members, so now they have to go through war, which was always a hassle for Yoongi to clean up. 
So when he arrived later at night, he felt the need to bring you something to make up for it. Surely, you were going to be waiting for him when he got home, you always were. With a hand full of chocolates, the other one full of beautiful flowers, he opened the door to his large home and immediately went upstairs to your shared bedroom.   
“Sweetie?” Yoongi softly called out, opening the door slowly just in case you were sleeping. But instead of seeing your peaceful, but beautiful sleeping form on the white bed, he saw empty sheets and a messy closet. It took him time, but he realized you had done it. You ran away. Yoongi dropped the gifts and clutched his hair, before yelling in frustration. How could he let you get away, you were his everything! He should’ve been more careful! Thoughts like this swirled Yoongi’s mind, making him sit for a moment to collect himself. 
“Take a deep breath,” he muttered to himself, reminding himself of you trying to calm him down. That brought him down from his high and exited the bedroom, going into the computer room where he typed away furiously. He hacked into local camera trying to find you, but you seemed to cover your tracks well because he couldn't spot you in any of them. That didn’t mean he was going to give up though. 
Yoongi spent weeks of sleepless night where he simply ran on caffeine in front of his computer screen, the patter of his finger against the keys never stopping unless for a bathroom or coffee break. His phone buzzed all night, probably from his members calling for his help. They didn’t matter right now, you did and he wasn’t resting until he found you. 
One day, one thankful day, you had slipped up. It had been weeks of your runaway and Yoongi was close to becoming crazy without seeing you. Pictures could only hold him back for so long. he had caught sight of one of your earrings in the corner of one picture, then the next was a full image of your distressed face. 
“Oh, baby. I’m coming to get you right now, don’t be sad anymore.” Yoongi wanted t touch you through the screen, but of course, the only way he could was if he saw you in person, which is what he was going to do. After hopping into one of his fastest cars, he sped through town to go to the place you were staying at. One photo can lead you to many places, and this one led him to you. 
He crashes through the glass doors, pushing it so aggressively to the side it almost broke.  he demanded you at the front desk, not afraid to flash his handgun to the desk lady who quickly gave you the room number and then ran away afterward. When Yoongi finally got to your room, he wasted no time in barging in, not bothering to knock. 
Yoongi saw you covering yourself with the sheets, and he dropped his gun to the side to bring you into the most suffocating hug. After when he pulled away, he hungrily kissed your lips that he so desperately craved. Through wet tears he sobbed into your arms, saying how sad he was without you he felt like he was going to die. 
“I was so sad! Why? Why did you leave me when I had no one else?! You’re so lucky I found you before I went crazy, or else who knows what I would do?” 
“Don’t worry baby, I’m gonna spend so much more time with you, I won’t ever leave your side so you can’t pull anything like this again. I love you so much, I’m so thankful I found you!” 
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kim namjoon: 
His day was going wonderful, much better than he expected. He woke up to the lovely breakfast that you prepared with your whole heart, as you said to him when you served his food, and he felt his heart swell up. You were like his angel and he would do anything to protect you. It took everything he had to leave the comfort of his bed, and it was much harder when you were so peacefully sleeping in his arms. But he knew he had a job to do and people counted on him every day. 
When he arrived at work, people greeted him with bows of respect as he only nodded. He went straight to his office to get to work of a messed up trading deal, and it was already 5 hours into his work and he was getting tired of looking at the papers in front of him. so he began to text you, frantically. It started calm, but then when you didn’t respond he texts began to become more erratic and desperate.
‘baby?’
‘are you okay? did something happen?’
‘you aren’t responding like usual...’
Namjoon was told he worried too much for you, but he thought it was normal. After all, it gave him the advantage because then he could always know when something was wrong with you. Like right now, something had to be up. He left his office heading to the technology hub in the middle of the large facility. 
“Get me cameras on every street corner and street crossing!” 
At the sound of his demanding tone, people scurried and pulled pictures from all over Seoul. he told his men to keep an open eye for any image or picture of you, then did so. But none of them caught anything, including Namjoon. 
“Boss, maybe you’re over thinking this. Just head home and we’ll keep an open eye.” Namjoon nodded and quietly stepped out of the hub, immediately heading for his overly expensive car. He drove home trying to assure himself everything was fine, but there was always a voice in the back of his head that was soon going to send him into alert mode. 
When he arrived home, he took note of how your car was still parked out in the garage. He still wasted no time in rushing into the house, ignoring the greetings from his servants. He made his way up to your shared bedroom and sighed when he saw you weren’t there. Where could you have gone? What if you were hurt? At this time, Namjoon looked down on himself for making his relationship with you public, now you the lover of a mafia boss was walking out in the city all alone, no guards or anything. 
“Fuck!” Was all Namjoon could say before bolting out of his house again. Fuck being patient. Fuck over-thinking. And fuck the help of others, he would find you by himself, without anyone. This, of course, meant the process is longer, but he would feel so much better when he would find you and know he did it by himself, he was capable of taking care of what was his anyway. 
On a late night drive, he caught a glimpse of a woman walking down the street by herself. the chances of it being you were slim, but Namjoon couldn’t help himself from checking. Slowly, he pulled the car to the curb and stepped out of the vehicle. He grabbed onto the girl’s shoulder, and surprisingly it was you. Namjoon wasted no time, he brought you to the car and you were too worn out to even fight back. When you arrived back home, he pampered you to death. That is before he bombarded you with questions. 
“I was going to go crazy! So many sleepless nights, but it’s fine because I finally have you again, my love. I finally have you again.” 
“Why do you run away? Was it something I did? Tell me! I can’t just let this go, I was really going insane!” 
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jung hoseok:
His original plan was to spend the whole day with you, it was like his off-day. And he really wanted to be with you today because work had scrambled him up and he just needed to have private time with you again. But of course, the plan didn’t work out and right when you two were watching a movie he got a call. He was going to ignore it, but you told him it was going to be important and e should pick it up. Apparently, something so urgent happened at the HQ and he was the only one that could fix it. the whole call sounded like complete bullshit, but he knew he had to go and report to his duties, no matter how much he hated those duties. 
When he got to the HQ, it seemed like it was empty. When he stepped into the center where everyone usually would be, there was no one. He took a step into his office and there was no one there. was this some shit prank? because he made sure to tell everyone that he was going to have an off-day and no one was allowed to interrupt, it was his only time to be with you and now it was ruined. 
“Those bastards,”  was all Hoseok said as he made his way out and to his car once again. They were going to get punished so badly when he comes back tomorrow, they really went and pushed him. But he had to forget about that for now and just return home to you. He was already smiling at the thought of you two together for the whole night, and if he really was lucky, tomorrow morning as well. His mind drifted off and before he knew it he was back home. 
He didn’t notice how your car had left the spot of the garage mainly because he was already rushing to go back inside. he pouted upon seeing you no longer sitting on your spot on the couch, but his face lit up. what if you were so tired you went straight to bed, that would've been the absolute cutest. He rushed upstairs, calling your name out cutely, but when he opened the door he met emptiness again. 
“Huh? Y/n-ie! Angel!!” he called out, this time more frantically, throwing over duvets and pillows, practically turning the whole house upside down. Panic set in as he looked outside and saw that your car was missing, he scoffed at his inability to realize that when he firsts arrived home again. 
Thankfully, he set up a GPS tracker on one of the backseats in your car. He calmly, but not so-calmly, tapped on his phone to find out the exact location of where your car currently was. When he found out you were staying in a hotel downtown, he wasted no time to make his way downtown, driving fast.
he had to get to you quickly before something happened to you. Hoseok tried to push away all of his empty worries, assuring himself nothing would happen to you and you would be fine. Everyone in town knew how you were and they knew no better than to mess with his girl. So when his expensive car pulled up to the hotel’s parking lot, people ducked their heads and looked in the other direction away from his menacing glare. It was beginning to be hard to control his temper. 
He didn’t bother explaining himself to the desk lady, flashing his handgun and keeping it out until he was in the elevator ride, to the floor you were staying in. He had snatched a keycard from the desk lady and inserted it into the slot, quietly opening the door. He sighed in relief when he heard the shower running and then waited for you on the bed. 
He examined the room to see you even bothered packing, did you plan this all along? Was that why you were so keen on him leaving the house? Did you privately speak to his men, and did they abide by your request? Well, obviously did they because look where the two of you were now. 
When he heard the water stop, he waited outside the bathroom door. when you stepped out of the shower, hair wet and only wearing a towel, Hoseok pinned you to the wall he was previously leaning on. He stared into your frightened eyes, his piercing into your own before his expression flipped. A kind smile adorned his face as he cupped your cheeks, pushing away wet strands of hair to see you properly. He wasn’t going to unleash his suspicions on you, nor his anger, that’s what he was going to do to his men though, and they were going to regret ever speaking to you. 
“Angel, I missed you so much! You were only gone for 2 hours, but I was going mad! That’s how much you mean to me!” 
“I don’t wanna hear anything about this from now on anymore, this is in the past and we can both forget this ever happened, okay angel? I’m just happy i was smart enough to find you again, oh I love you!” 
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park jimin:
Jimin was working on papers in his office when someone bursts into his room, panting heavily. Jimin looks at them unimpressed and then asks them what they have to tell him. 
“Sir,” there was a pause for another deep breath, “it’s Y/n! She was spotted by the spies you sent to follow her! She was seen with 2 large suitcases.” 
Jimin stopped his hand from signing the paper, looking up at the young boy in front of him. “Are you shitting me right now? Because if this is a joke you are asked to leave.” Jimin really didn’t believe it, you wouldn’t do that to him. You never would even think about going away, without telling him. Isn’t that running away? Why would you need to run away from him? All these questions only confirmed his ideas of this being a prank of some sorts.
“We swear it, sir, we wouldn’t lie about your girl like this....did you know she was going away? Or is sh-” 
“Get out!” Jimin's loud voice was heard throughout the HQ. He took in a deep breath and dialed your number on his phone, hoping you would pick up. Crushing his hopes, you didn't and Jimin was left hearing your sweet voice over voicemail. As much as Jimin lived for your voice, he needed to hear it from you right now, not some voice recording which was recorded months ago. 
“I’m leaving, make sure Jungkook takes care of anything that happens!” and that was all the gang heard from Jimin before he disappeared. His movements were frantic as he cleared off the study table which was in your once shared room. He cried when he noticed just how empty he was without. With a heavy heart, he shut the laptop and crawled into the bed, purposely going onto your side to take in your still present scent. 
For the past days, Jimin’s heart was empty as he scrolled through each security camera he could hack into, none showing any signs of you. His heart broke every night he had to crawl into bed by himself and be left with his thoughts that were only o you. How were you? What if you had gotten hurt? No, you wouldn’t. everyone knew to steer clear from you or else they would be dead the next day. Why were you hiding from him? 
Jimin fell into depression when you left, every night either crying himself to sleep or staring at is phone longing at the image of one of your selcas. He was blocked from all of your social media accounts so al he was old photos of you. He tried his best to create separate accounts but you were smart never accepted his follow requests or just blocked that account if you did. At least that was he knew you were safe and alive.  
Jimin was lurking the internet one day, eyes bloodshot red from his tears and a long time in front of his phone screen. He saw one of your friends take a picture with you, smiling in front of the backdrop of a beach. You must be in Busan, which would explain why he didn’t find any of your images in the security camera’s in Seoul. 
in seconds Jimin was heading down to his hometown, luggage, and laptop in hand as he boarded a train to Busan. He checked into a hotel which was near the beach you have located in the picture. He set up his search table rather quickly, looking through each security camera that was near his area. His watchful eyes stared at all of them, all by himself may I add, and he perked up when he saw a slither of a scarf that he had remembered. It was a gift he had gotten for you, it warmed his heart that you were still wearing. 
Finally, after months of searching for you, he found you and he was thankful. He watched live through the cameras as you traveled through the town, by yourself thankfully, and smiled softly when you looked at things through the windows of shops. He pinned the location to his phone and left eh hotel, in a frenzy to catch up to where you were just to be sure that he didn’t miss you. When he saw you a few stores down from where he last saw, he sprinted to you. 
You didn’t notice or hear the running and approaching steps of your ‘boyfriend’ so you almost toppled to the ground when he threw his body at you. Stumbling back a few steps, you tried pushing him off, but his hold didn’t waver he was never going to let you go ever again. He couldn't risk you leaving him again. He spent months all alone and that washed, but it was worse knowing you had left him. he would do anything to make sure that never happened again. 
He missed the feeling of you pressed against him, all those times he cuddled you to sleep occasionally singing you to sleep. He missed rubbing your hand up and down your back, he missed your lively scent, Jimin really missed you. he felt so dead without you and he realized how much he depended on you, and he didn’t mind that. He needed you to live, and he was fine with that as long as you didn't leave him ever again. 
“Why did you leave me? Just tell me and I’ll improve whatever it was I did. please, talk to me.”
“I spent nights awake and just looking for you, hug me, kiss me, show me that you love em! Anything Y/n, I need your touch!” 
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kim taehyung: 
Taehyung would be the angriest and most devastated. He was having an ordinary in his workplace and he decided to head home earlier than he was planned to, not that he minded of course. He would kill to just drop everything and go home to you, literally and he made sure you knew that he would do anything for you.  
When he got passed all of the security, with ease obviously he owned the place, he waltzed into his house the servants taking his jacket off of his broad shoulders. He commanded for the servants for a warm bath, he wanted to spend more time with you today and he planned that it was going to be a long night for the two of you already. When he finally entered your room, you were packing clothes into a luggage. You jolted at the sound of the door opening and you were frozen still in place. you didn’t think he was going to be home this early, he was an hour earlier than you originally thought. 
“Baby girl, what are you doing?” Taehyung asked darkly, seeing you slowly backing away from his footsteps. “What are you doing packing your clothes into a luggage? What are you doing?” 
“I-I, uh...” you stuttered, backing into the wall. Taehyung was a few feet away from you and his eyes were looking at the scattered room. You turned around quickly and snapped open the window, too fast for Taehyung to react, you jumped out. He went to the ledge as saw as you clutched your leg, yeah jumping from a 2 story building wasn’t the plan, but you had no other choice. It was your only chance to leave Taehyung, and you were definitely going to take it.  
“Hey! Get every goddamn guard down there!” Taehyung yelled, leaving his spot by the window to get to the yard. In seconds, people surrounded you and carried you to the car which Taehyung was holding your hand through the whole way. Of course, he was fuming, because of your antics, you ended up with a broken leg. But he still didn’t forget about the luggage. were you really planning on leaving him? His jaw clenched at the thought. 
When you got a cast attache onto your leg, you were bedridden for days, or at least Taehyung made you. he took so many weeks off of work, he had to take care of you and because he wanted to make sure you knew you had no choice but to be with him. he made sure if he even left your room for five minutes, you were being watched by his guards. 
He wouldn’t risk this ever happening again, he couldn’t live without you. What if you had continued a more serious injury than this? Losing you would be losing his will to live. When you were lying in your bed, on your phone or anything to avoid Taehyung’s watchful eyes, he started speaking to you in a low tone. He knew what you were doing that night thanks to his prying questions and glaring eyes. You were sweating under his gaze and you never felt more intimidated in your whole life. 
Taehyung was a scary man, that was a fact, but he never wanted to show you that side of him. but he had to set rules for you to abide to make sure this never happened again, he loved you. Taehyung really did and this was his way of showing it, whether you thought so or not. 
“What were you thinking? You wanted to run away? Tell me why, why do you want to run away from me, love?” 
“You can never leave this house unless I know where you’re going and with who. You’re fine in here, and safer than you are out in that world. You have to be here so I can protect you, it’s for the best.” 
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jeon jungkook: 
Jungkook was confused when he woke up without you by his side. it was an odd feeling not to have you in his arms when he woke up, it was usually the other way around. He had work you had school, but then Jungkook remembered. You had a very important lecture today and you had to get to school earlier than other days. Jungkook smiled at your care for your studies, it was cute, except when you focused on them more than him. Then it was annoying. 
He got out of bed, seeing the clock that read 8:00 am, meaning you had left recently. Jungkook shook his head and got out of bed, reluctantly getting ready for the day ahead without you there with him. After taking a shower he went down to the kitchen where he saw eggs and toast, and little slip of paper right near the utensils. 
He sat at the table, immediately digging into the food while picking up the white piece of paper. the smile on his face quickly vanished. the first few words were enough for him to forget about his position as he was rushing out the door, the letter left on the kitchen table. It was a goodbye letter, but Jungkook ignored all of it too focused to find you. 
You were still at school, right? Jungkook speeded through town, ignore the honks of the people he passed and cut off and didn’t even bother glancing at the police cars that were looking at him as he sped away. he had to find you before you go too far. When he burst into your university, every student moved back. they knew you were the lover a mafia boss, that’s why you never were the victim of bullies. 
Jungkook stormed through your university before getting tired of looking and slammed one of the poor students against the wall. they barely were able to stutter out that you never came into class and you had told people the other day you were flying out of the country for a boarding school. Jungkook tried to believe him, but it was so hard. had you been secretly doing this?  or was this simply a joke made on Jungkook? 
Jungkook dropped the boy onto the floor, pressing his shoe against their chest. 
“Which airport?’ 
When the kid answered with an I don’t know, Jungkook punched him blacking him out. he needed answers! he had to stop you from leaving him, not that he couldn’t follow you out of the country, of course, he could. He just wanted to see you right now, he could wait any more hours. now that he knew the situation he could stop you before you left. 
A student jumped out and stopped Jungkook from going in with another punch, and yelled out which airport. Jungkook only nodded before sprinting out of the university driving to Incheon Airport. You were going to America, that much he knew fro another comment made by a student. Jungkook slammed his foot on the brake when he got to the airport. 
He slammed the door shut and once again sprinted through the whole airport. Security looked at him before their faces contorted into fear, why was the mafia boss in the airport? What happened? In most scenarios, aJungkook would smirk with pride but right now he needed to find you. It was obvious people knew who he was, so he pushed a security guard to the side and asked him where you were and what gate you were. 
They got a car to speed through the airport, taking him through shortcuts to see you. When they arrived at your gate, Jungkook got off and ran to the waiting area. he scanned the crowd of people sitting down and smiled gleefully when he saw your familiar (h/c).
He walked slowly to you at first but then began running once again because he really needed you in his arms. when he gave you a tight back hug, he ignored ou stiffening from his touch. People that were once sitting next to you, shuffled away recognizing the person holding you. 
“Hey baby, did you miss me?” Jungkook whispered into your ear and you heard the anger in his voice. You had no other choice but to be dragged with him all the way back to the apartment you two shared. Jungkook pushed away his mild anger and instead brought you into bed with him, cuddling you until you fell asleep. 
When you were surely asleep, Jungkook whispered question after question, knowing you wouldn’t reply. he felt nice to just have you in his arms again, it was absolute hell, even if it was only for a few hours, to be away from you. 
“Goodbye? I’m going to find you Y/n, I swear I will. you can't leave me.” 
“Aren’t you so happy I found you! before you could leave m me, not like I wouldn’t find you, I’d follow you anywhere, baby~” 
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blessethwrites · 5 years
Text
stars exploding
(Day 1 of MultiSaku Month)
Fandom: Naruto
Pairing: SasuSaku
Summary: Don't get Sakura wrong, she was happy she and Sasuke were becoming friends, following everything that had happened. Ecstatic even. But hell, did he have to be on her mind all the damn time?
On AO3
Her love for Sasuke had always been one of her defining characteristics, Sakura was starting to realize. Back in the Academy that was the thing everyone knew about her and, to be fair, she hadn’t minded. Then when they were placed on the same team that damn crush continued to be her driving force even as Naruto and Sasuke kept growing and improving, not only as shinobi but also as people; it was somewhere around the Chunin exams that Sakura had decided her feelings were more than an infatuation and had been brave enough to call it love.
It all spiralled from there. And somehow after all those years, after an entire damn war, that same love she held for him remained so deeply ingrained in her very being that she couldn’t imagine ever not loving him.
Except. She let out a heavy sigh once she finished up the last of her paperwork. Now things were different. There was no war anymore, there was no need to run around chasing Sasuke and silly as it might’ve sounded, it felt like the beginning of a new era. And for once, Sakura was happy with where she was. She was enjoying settling into her new life. That was a challenge of its own -- even after a few months, at times she still had trouble remembering it was all over -- but not an unwelcome one. The others, at least, seemed to be struggling with getting used to the newly established life of peace as well, and Sakura thought there was a sense of relief in navigating their new lives together.
She pushed herself up from her desk and stretched in an attempt to work out the kinks in her back. Ino would tell her to stop overthinking everything and just enjoy it; and she’d be right, of course, even though Sakura would never admit that to her face. The thing was, there wasn't a switch she could turn to stop thinking. In fact, thinking was all she’d been doing lately and somehow it all kept coming back to Sasuke. As it always did.
She wondered, not for the first time, why she seemed to be the only one unable to move on. Their former classmates had. Karin had. Ino had. Meanwhile, Sakura was stuck. Or at least, she had been. She still believed she’d always love Sasuke, except lately she was starting to realize that didn’t necessarily mean romantic love. After all, platonic love was just as precious.
So one could say she was slowly coming to terms with the fact that perhaps while she did love him, it was only as a dear friend. A very, very dear friend. And she tried to treat him as such, she reasoned with herself. She'd come to pacing around the room which wasn’t all that spacious to begin with and nodded along to her thoughts. Yes, ever since Sasuke had been released on probation she’d made sure to be friendly while not being too friendly to a point where he might feel uncomfortable. She really wanted to build a relationship with him that wasn’t based on a childish infatuation followed by years of separation. She wanted to get to know the man he’d become and to become someone he could trust in return; she wanted that teammate bond they lacked, the one she’d dismissed as boring when she’d been younger.
And it seemed he wasn’t entirely opposed to the idea. Of course, she hadn’t been so forward as to tell him all of that but she’d made an effort he appeared to recognize. She would even go as far as say he tried to return it in his own way. And she was incredibly happy he did, naturally, but that didn’t mean she was equally happy that he occupied so many of her thoughts.
“Friends, you idiot, friends,” she chastised herself and let out a low groan. She was hopeless, was what she was. She immediately tensed once she heard a snort come from behind her and whirled around, fists ready, only to recognize the chakra signature at the very last moment.
“Um,” she racked her brain for something to say, mind drawing blank. As much as she thought about him, nothing could really compare to the real thing, she realized as she watched Sasuke raise an eyebrow at her. “Hi?”
He let out another snort and shook his head; there was something akin to fondness in his eyes, though Sakura must have imagined that. “Hi,” he returned her greeting dryly and she had to stifle a grin. During the past months, she’d come to find he had a very dry sense of humour; right now he was basically teasing her. “I see you’re busy, should I come back later?”
This time she let the grin spread on her lips and leaned back until she was perched on her desk. It wasn’t as unusual as it would’ve been some time ago, to have Sasuke stop by to visit her at the hospital, but it also wasn’t as if he’d made it into a habit. A happy surprise, Sakura would call it. “Is there something I can do for you or did you just come to tell jokes?”
He seemed amused by her comment but didn’t say anything. He was watching her, eyes calculating, and she had no idea what he was looking for until he finally spoke up. “You haven’t had dinner yet, have you.”
The tone of his voice suggested it was a statement rather than a question and that he knew perfectly well she hadn’t. Sakura threw a glance at the old clock sitting on the desk next to her and then her eyes returned to Sasuke almost defensively; it wasn’t that late. “No,” she said cautiously, hoping to avoid a lecture. Not that Sasuke was the type to give her one, generally, but she’d had enough from both Ino and Naruto to last her a lifetime. She shrugged lightly. “I was going to head home soon anyway.”
He merely hummed, unmoving from where he was leaning on the wall, and Sakura crossed her arms. Her days of trying to decipher his grunts were over; if he wanted to say something he’d have to use actual words. She raised an eyebrow at him, stifling a smile as he snorted, apparently having understood her silent protest. “Come eat with me. I made too much food.”
His wording was a little off but it was still major progress from the closed-off boy he’d used to be, Sakura thought fondly. Then her brain caught up with the fact he’d invited her to have dinner with him and she had to look away, choosing to focus on a few of the manila folders sitting on her right side. As she straightened them out, making sure they were perfectly aligned with both the desk and each other, she cleared her throat. “Um, yeah, sure, that’d be nice.” When she finally glanced back at him there was something in his eyes she couldn’t quite read. “Thank you for offering.”
Sasuke shrugged, shifting his weight slightly, and looked around the room. “You done?”
Sakura bit her lip and it took everything in her not to fidget. She could certainly find something to keep her busy if she looked for it, like a last minute patient or a nurse who needed help; those were always easy to find. And on any other night that was precisely what she would’ve done. But tonight Sasuke was here and he wanted to have dinner with her, and as anxious as the idea made her, she was also looking forward to it. She threw him a small smile and pushed herself away from the desk. “Yeah, all done.”
Sasuke grunted once again, in response to which she reached to poke him in the ribs; no grunting on her watch. He let out an amused huff and Sakura’s smile grew as the two of them headed towards the main entrance. She couldn’t help but think how weird it was that spending time with Sasuke felt so normal. She’d expected there to be a certain awkwardness, all things considered, and while there had been in the beginning, it had all but dissipated by now. Yet another example of how much better their platonic relationship was as opposed to the one-sided crush she’d had, she thought.
When she glanced at Sasuke out of the corner of her eye, she was surprised to find he was already looking at her. “What?”
He didn’t move his gaze for a while and once he finally did, Sakura realized she’d been subconsciously holding her breath. “You get lost in your head a lot,” he said simply without offering any more explanation. He didn’t need to, anyway, she knew exactly what he meant.
“Sorry.” She threw him a sheepish grin and had to resist the urge to rub the back of her neck; she refused to completely turn into Kakashi. The ghost of a smile on Sasuke’s lips told her he knew exactly what she’d been thinking which made her grin widen. “I promise for the rest of the night I’ll be one hundred percent present.”
Sasuke didn’t offer a verbal response, something Sakura was about to tease him for, when she spotted Shizune talking to Kira-san on the front desk. She glanced at them and raised a finger to signal Sasuke she’d be just a moment; then she moved to approach the two women.
“Hey,” she smiled and nodded in greeting before turning to Shizune as the nurse moved to give them some privacy. “Do you need my help with anything? I wanted to check with you before I head out.”
The look Shizune gave her had Sakura raising her hands and hurrying to explain; she didn’t want Shizune thinking she was shrinking her duties or anything of the sort. “My shift ended a few hours ago, but if you need me then of course I’ll stay--”
The woman laughed, hands coming to rest over Sakura’s. “I know, I know. I was just surprised you’re voluntarily leaving, that’s all; I’m pretty sure Naruto-kun had to drag you away last time.”
The memory made Sakura flush as she recalled Naruto insisting she was overworking herself and quite literally carrying her out of the hospital; while she appreciated the concern, it was embarrassing. “Yes, well…” She trailed off and her gaze slid to Sasuke who was patiently waiting for her by the doors. He raised both his eyebrows when he caught her gaze and she shook her head before turning back to Shizune, not quite managing to contain her smile.
“Ah, I get it now.” Shizune’s tone was teasing but the warmth in it was unmistakable and Sakura’s flush became even more apparent.
“It’s not like that, Shizune, don’t tease me,” she laughed it off. “Not you too.” She’d been getting suggestive looks and wry smirks for at least a month now and she wasn’t sure how many more times she could repeat the phrase ‘we’re just friends’. She wasn’t mad, she knew nobody meant anything by it, but she could definitely go without it as well.
Shizune’s smile turned apologetic. “Sorry, I couldn’t help myself.” She glanced down the hallway behind Sakura and let out a semi-amused breath. “You better get going before there’s an emergency and you end up staying here the whole night.”
Sakura snorted in agreement before saying her goodbyes. Finally, she returned to Sasuke’s side. “Okay, now I’m really all done.”
He held the door open for her, a gesture that would’ve made her past self swoon. If she was being perfectly honest it made her swoon now as well, but she told herself it was only natural. She would’ve enjoyed it regardless of the person.
“Are you inviting Naruto?” she spoke up once they’d started walking. As far as she was aware they were headed towards Sasuke’s new apartment at the centre of the village and while it wasn’t far from the hospital, she didn’t want them to spend the walk in silence.
Her question made him huff as he glanced at her, amused. “I said I made too much food but not that much.”
She shook her head at the familiar teasing but there was also a side of her that grew even more anxious now that he’d more or less confirmed it would just be the two of them. It was fine, though, it really was. Friends had dinner together all the time. It was fine.
“How’s work at the hospital?”
It wasn’t the question itself that surprised her rather than the fact he’d asked it at all. She quickly tried to shake the surprise off, however, and simply shrugged. “Not a lot going on right now, but that’s good news.” She paused, considering. “Of course there’s still a ton of paperwork, but at least I also have some more time to do research. Actually, Hinata’s been letting me have a closer look at the Byakugan and it’s really fascinating.”
She wasn’t about to go into detail about her findings for one because the information was only to be kept inside the Hyuga clan and for another, most people would find it boring even if she could talk about it. In any case, Sasuke was a smart man, she had no doubt he’d understand the secrecy around the Hyugas’ bloodline limit.
He seemed to hesitate for a moment before glancing away, looking anywhere but at her as he spoke. “I don’t mind if you want to research the Sharingan.”
Sakura actually stopped walking for a moment out of sheer shock. The Uchihas were notoriously secretive when it came to their bloodline limit, even moreso than the Hyugas. For Sasuke to say this to her…
“I wasn’t trying to imply--” she started to say once she remembered to keep walking but he simply sighed, cutting her off before she’d had the chance to explain she hadn’t mentioned Hinata in some attempt to rope Sasuke into letting her do the same to him.
“Sakura. What you find will benefit me as well,” was all he said and she could feel her heartbeat slowly return to its normal pace. That made perfect sense; of course he’d want to know more about the Sharingan, especially since he was the last living Uchiha. She was overthinking everything, as usual. Sasuke cleared his throat and although his voice was quiet, Sakura heard him perfectly. “I trust you.”
“Oh.” Even if she’d wanted to, she couldn’t have helped her wide smile. There were a lot of things she could say in return, from Thank you to I trust you too, but she had a feeling Sasuke still wasn’t completely used to being so open with his emotions and she didn’t want to scare him off. Baby steps, she reminded herself. “Okay then. Whenever you’re free you can stop by the hospital and we can get started. Just make sure to let me know beforehand.”
Sasuke gave a sharp nod and after a beat proceeded to surprise her yet again. “Are you free tomorrow?”
She fumbled for a response, letting out a small, unsure chuckle as she did. “Um, sure. Does noon work for you?”
This time the nod was the only answer she received and before he could throw any more curveballs at her, she found they’d reached his apartment. He unlocked the door easily enough -- Sakura would forever be jealous of doors which didn’t need prodding and punching to open, unlike her own -- and led her to the dining room. The apartment wasn’t big but Sakura liked that about it; she had a feeling Sasuke did too. Somehow it had a homey feel to it, despite the scarce decorations. Perhaps it was because there was a bit of Team Seven scattered around every room -- a few of Kakashi’s books were resting on a shelf in the dining room which also served as a living room, the bathroom smelled of kiwi and mango, courtesy of Sakura leaving a spare bottle of shampoo in case she needed to sleep over, and she also knew for a fact that the fridge was well-stocked with instant ramen. In any case, whatever it was, it made her feel at home. She had to imagine Sasuke felt the same way, despite his actual childhood home being on the other side of the village. He’d mentioned to her a few weeks back that it felt more like a graveyard than a home, and her heart had broken for him.
“Here,” he said as he entered the room, placing one plate on the table in front of Sakura and one right across of it, where he took a seat. “It’s omusubi.”
Sakura could see that but she also knew what he really meant; it was basically the equivalent of him asking if it was an acceptable meal. She gave him a small smile. “It looks lovely.” And it really did. She could spot fish flakes and what appeared to be tomatoes, and she found herself thinking this was a very Sasuke-like meal. “Itadakimasu.”
Sasuke echoed her words and the two of them proceeded to eat in silence -- strangely enough, Sakura didn’t feel any of the unease she’d expected. This was technically the first time she and Sasuke dined together, just the two of them, and it was actually a nice change of pace. With Naruto there was always this sense of urgency to their meal, especially seeing how quick he was to finish his food. Sasuke, on the other hand, took his time.
She remembered how he’d be just as fast as Naruto back in their childhood, matching his pace with ease, but she also assumed that had been merely a part of the rivalry the two of them shared. Now things were different. While the rivalry was still there, Sakura liked to think it had taken a turn for the better.
“There’s anmitsu in the fridge,” Sasuke said some time later, eyes not moving from the rice ball he was holding with his chopsticks. His tone was even, as if describing the weather, but Sakura couldn’t help staring. While that was one of her favourite foods, he hated sweets. She knew that because back when she was young and crushing on him, she’d made a point to catalogue all of his likes and dislikes. And sweets definitely fell into the latter category.
It made no sense unless he’d developed a sweet tooth during all those years away from Konoha, a thought that made her unreasonably sad. She knew he’d changed, she wasn’t stupid, but there was something about the idea of not knowing him as well as she used to that unsettled her.
And that was precisely why they were doing the friendship thing, she reminded herself. To get to know each other better. So she hummed in a way she hoped seemed casual enough and swallowed the last of her food before replying. “I didn’t know you liked sweets.”
The amusement was plain in his eyes though the rest of his face remained impassive. “I don’t.”
“Oh.”
Her response, or the lack of thereof, seemed to amuse him even further, but there was also that same flash of fondness she’d thought she’d imagined earlier. He didn’t say anything else as he too finished his meal until at last, he stood up and moved to go to the kitchen. Sakura watched as he disappeared behind the door only to return a few moments later with a small bowl of anmitsu.
“Wait, you also made this?” When he’d mentioned having sweets she’d assumed he’d just bought them. Sasuke grunted in response and she couldn’t even find it in herself to get mad. “Wow. I-- Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me before you’ve made sure it’s edible,” he said dryly but she could see the careful way he was watching her as she tried the dessert.
She didn’t know what she expected but it was good. Everything tasted just as it was supposed to and she smiled. “It’s great, Sasuke, thank you. Not just for dessert but the whole meal. And,” she added with a laugh, “for getting me out of the hospital.”
A snort of amusement and another easy silence fell upon the room. Sakura took the opportunity to get another look around. Sure, she’d been there before with Naruto and Kakashi for team bonding or something of the sort, but now, with nothing else to do, she found her eyes drifting. Not entirely surprising that they landed on a picture, the only one she could see, standing innocently on a small coffee table. Their old genin photo.
It was Naruto who had given it to Sasuke, frame and all, upon his return, but the mere fact he’d kept it and displayed so openly had warmth blooming in Sakura’s chest. They had different teams now and Sai and Yamato were without a doubt part of their little family but even so, the four of them -- herself, Sasuke, Naruto and Kakashi -- had something that felt special.
Sasuke noticed her gaze, naturally, but he didn’t say anything. She had a strong feeling he didn’t like to think about those times, regardless of all the good parts, and she respected that; one thing she’d learnt as a medic was that everyone coped in different ways.
“Once again, thank you for the meal,” she repeated as she set the now empty bowl down on the table, suddenly unsure of what to do with her hands. She ended up clasping them in her lap in order to resist fidgeting. “I guess I better get going now. I have an early shift tomorrow and you can imagine what those are like.” She’d stood up at some point and now had to bite her lip to stop talking; she could feel the words bubbling up under the surface and she didn’t think Sasuke would appreciate her rambling.
“I’ll walk you.”
He was also standing, moving around the table to stand in front of her, and she blinked up at him. “Are you sure?” She didn’t add that she could take care of herself because if after everything they’d been through he still didn’t see that then there wasn’t much else she could do. And besides, she had a feeling he hadn’t offered in some misguided attempt to protect her; Naruto usually walked her home after every little gathering they attended, and when he wasn’t able to, Kakashi did it instead under the excuse he was headed in the same direction as her anyway. Hell, even Sai had walked her on one memorable occasion which nearly ended with him in the hospital.
Thus, she concluded, Sasuke was just being a good friend. Still, she didn’t want him to feel as though he had to simply because other members of their team did.
He looked at her in a way that said plenty; if she had to interpret it as just one sentence, however, it would be something along the lines of Of course I’m sure, I wouldn’t have offered otherwise. Another smile grew on her lips and distinctly she remembered Ino saying something about how she’d been smiling a lot lately.
The walk to her apartment was, unsurprisingly, silent. But Sasuke didn’t seem to be in a hurry, matching her slower pace without complaint, and when she felt the heat of his body by her side, she realized they were walking closer than usual too.
Upon reaching the door, she turned to face him. “Thank you for walking me.”
He was about to respond with another grunt, she could feel it, but when he saw her raised eyebrow, his lips twitched in amusement. “You’re welcome.”
Pleased, she turned back around to face the door and was about to insert the key when her mouth opened without her permission. “Would you like to come inside?” She froze, scrunching her nose at her stupidity, and took a breath before looking over her shoulder at Sasuke who hadn’t moved an inch. “For, uh, tea?”
She watched his face carefully, ready to backtrack the second he showed any sign of annoyance, and promptly stopped breathing when he smiled. It was only a half-smile, granted, but it was the closest to a genuine one she’d seen from him and it was directed at her. It softened all his features and even his dark eyes, which had seemed so emotionless a few years ago, now appeared warm.
“Yes,” was all he said and her heart skipped a beat.
So much for platonic feelings.
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blckdtd · 3 years
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"Train"
i had a crush on a college friend for like three years already... maybe longer than that. im writing this post because ive dreamt about him this morning. i tried to sleep again as i still want to continue that crazy dream since it was a bit beautiful. we were happy in that dream. but im not sure if because we are together as a couple or as something else.
i actually really like seeing him smile most of the time, thats why whenever we go home together i try to talk to him and make him laugh or smile as much as possible. but, being a funny person was not my best asset, so its always... awkward. it also fascinates me whenever we dont talk at all, or when his face is blank with unreadable emotion, though sometimes im having anxious thoughts that maybe he was annoyed on why do i kept talking and talking when he is clearly not interested. those moments taught me to shut my mouth most of the times.
but how did everything started? ill try to recall everything dont worry.
it was summer, and we were still freshman in college, group chats for sections in our department were already made and people were already having some clicks and groups. i also found our class' group chats, and while scrolling on the member's list, he was the first person i added on facebook since i noticed he was quite good looking (young me dumb me. always lookinh for the face. apologies). but i never messaged him personally on facebook.
first day came in, he was the first person i talked to actually since he was the person i first recognized. but, during freshman year, he was not my seasonal crush. had a crush on two person on different sememsters, one for each sememsters, but i dont think theres a need to elaborate on that i guess. maybe another time.
sophomore year is starting to come in. summer after fresh man year, i found out that the four of us will be in the same section, me, him, T, and A. the thing is, we actually belong in the same group of friends, we also have the gc (group chat). when i found out that the four of us are in the same class, i started to have some panic or thinking, that "oh shit. he is my classmate. this year. he ll be on the long list of my seasonal mandatory crush (i know. it sucks to have this mentality, like i cannot move forward to my life without having a crush on anyone or anything). i tried to avoid the feelings because he is quite a nice person. but it happened after that event.
swimming class, this was the first day i guess??? i cant remember. but i know it was the swimming class. the four of us were kinda huddled together since we dont rrally get alonv with everyone yet, and the instructor said to group ourselves in to two. to be honest, during the time, i quite sure o dont have the feelings for him yet. so me and him like automatically paired ourselves, since t and a automatically paired themselves. then he said "lets go there". then we grabbed each others hand, under the water. i can still remember that time because after that day, i did not exactly have it in mind, but the longer the time passes, the more i can remember, and im pretty sure he dont even remembered that day.
we hold hands under water and he lead the way. it was not the romantic type holding hands, the one where people actually intertwined their hands, it was just simple holding hands. then we let go, and started the routines we need to do.
being that im the fat one, i did feel how his hands are kinds bony since hes quite thin. and he is also lighter, i even believed that i could piggy back him if he ask me too. i know that he is lighter when our instructor ask us to do a simple floating where we simply lay flat on the water surface. it was fun knowing that he actually cant do that given that he is a really good swimmer and he is lighter too, but i can, a non good swimmer even if it could save my life. i almost like carried him in my arms to guide him how to float, thats how i found out he is light, but thats okay, i also liked that about him.
then one day, i woke up, i said to my self. "shit. im having a crush on him. this is not good". what i hate about this, is because i have the constant need to show off or have his attention or be in the same grouos or anything with him... like? we are already going home together cause we take tge same train or something, im so greedy, attention seeker, obsessed, annoying. i also chat him on facebook most of the time, like i always need to find a reason to talk to him or something. almost the whole year of second year college was me being a bother to him or something, and i just fully realized it now. and if ever for some reason you read this, yes, this is about you, and im really sorry for bothering you all these years thinking that you might, well, "reciprocate" the feelings, in short, sorry for being immature.
til this day, some parts of my heart, wished that there are times where he did enjoy our small talks on the train, or if he did enjoy having me as a "friend".
i can still remember how we talked about the girl you almost become girlfriend, about how you felt when one of our classmate gave you something on valentines day, how i fucked up and confessed of having feelings for you, and how we somehow remained as friends even after that day. i know you told our other friends that i confessed my feelings for you, thats why they started teasing me about it.
i missed you needing me to go somewhere sometimes because youre not much of a streetsmart or always forgets how to go some certain place. i remember how i said that you can rest your head on my shoulder when we were on the train on our way to one of our friends house to make a costume, how i lend my earphones to you so you can listen to some music even though i actually love listening to music, how you waited for me on train station even though i was late. we had a meet up.that day because you want to buy something that we found while looking for some naterials to make the costume, well you waited because you barely remember how to get there in the first place. not gonna lie, i was kinda happy how you waited for me on that station.
i can also remember how we talked throughout our jeepney ride on our way to the station, im sorry to say this, but during that day, i somehow had a hunch that you were just talking to me because i kinda led our way on how the two of us will get home, because you dont always talk to me in first place, ever since that day you knew, which i did understood, but i dont know why i still.stood my ground on seeking yoir attention. ha! but yes i can still remember how i take you to your station on your way home because you dont know your way, i got off of the train even though i could have just stayed and have my way home. it was fun though, and so foolish of me.
why am i even head over heels on you even after all this years? yes until now.
third year college, i promised my self that ill try to stop having feelings for you. but i didnt. but we were on that level where we just accepted that yeah i know that you know thatbinhave feelings for you but we will just be civil about it. we were kind of a pair tbh, you can use my phone whenever you want since that was the time when yiu dont have your own phone. you actually have more photos on that phone than me lol. we were in a civil state to the point we even became automatic pairs on an activity in botany class. we even became thesis groupmates. you probably had the most contribution on that thesis so i still thank you even till this day.
i also remembered when you asked me to come with you to get your birth certificate since you actually dont know how to get one, not gonna lie again, i was kinda having a moment back there since we were in the middle of thesis day, more like finishing it up, but you asked me to come with you. we travelled like for almost an hour for that, fell in line just to have your id photocopied, then i instructed you on which line you should take next, how to get this and that, then i waited for you, again. so we can also go back to the university. i had some realizations that day. on the lengths that my feelings for you drove me.
i also remembered how we went home together like we usually do after that earthquake since the station had a bit of crack on its foundation. but we went to separate ways you rode a jeepney on your way. i walked to mine.
one of the things that touched me was when you asked me about my favorite band, why did i liked them, and you somehow, had some small history, that you listened to them before or something.
but there are also those days where we dont even talked about anythibg at all. we just stayed silent. and bid our goodbyes and take cares. maybe those were your favorite days, just kidding.
im not trying to paint you as bad guy for not reciprocating or anything. im just remembering things, and i need to let them out.
it kinda sucks when i didnt saw you on the last day where we need to return our graduation gowns because i need to leave early that day because of an emergency family trip to the beach. just a celebration because i just graduated.
im sorry i still havent picked up your drawings that i said i will buy just to help you. because i had a job that time and you still havent because youre supposed to go to a medical school.
our company had a job opening but i was too shy to send the invite to you, idk why. i did tried to talk to you again just like a normal friend but, i know i cant. even while writing this, i can attest that im still not in the best condition to talk to you because i still... cant move on. this sucks.
there are parts of me that wished i didnt approached you on the first day of class. or maybe i shouldnt held your hand under water. or maybe... i shouldnt have just let this.feelings swallowed me.
i dreamed of you last night. but dont worry, nothinh sexual. i dreamed of holding your hand again. and seeing your smile. softly playing your hands until they were intertwined. it was a good dream. i wish i didnt woke up. but i need to.
your smile was so beautiful, i rarely saw them actually even after hundreds of train trips we had together. i loved the sound of your laugh actually that will soon give your smilling face. i can even remember your eyelashes they were so beautiful, though i hope you werent freaked out when i looked at you.
youre a beautiful person, your smart, you sometimes dark humor, you being lowkey gentleman, your creativity and artistry. everything about you.
to end this, i hope you know that it is not late to pursue your artistic passion or to go to a medical school. youre a brilliant person Eli, i hope you know that also. and i loved you, as person, as a friend, as someone who i went head over heels. right now, i do wish we meet again, but in a different time, but now, i only wish you happiness and success. thank you for being part of my life as a simple college student.
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okyio-archive · 6 years
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hey guys !! im so sorry for being absent for so long :+( !! it’s been a crazy couple of days and i really needed to recover after everything that has been happening. again i just want to say thank you for everyone who has been so patient with me. i’m going to clear these anon msgs + i’ll respond to all my private msgs&discord chats + check out what i’ve missed once i wake up tomorrow. i love you guys sm for showing love + support. i wish you a happy thursday :+)
sims related
Would u ever do an editing tutorial? like how u draw little doodles and stuff like that! If it's not too much fo a hassle. love you SO MUCH!! <3
hey nonny :+) please check the faq next time !! I’ve answered how i drew the little doodles there but for a full blown tutorial i’ve already mentioned that i’ll do one once i have more free time :+) !! thanks for the support love !!
What are your favorite brushes for edits?
i recently found one right over here :+) and i’ve been experimenting w/ em !! tbh i dont have a fav cause im always trying out new brushes out + seeing which ones i like !!! so im sorry if that doesn’t answer your question asjkdhf
hi!!! hope you're having a good day!! is it okay to use the sims from your sim dump in a story as long as you get credit? if not i totally understand!
thanks nonny for asking :+) !! yeah definitely !! you can do whatever you like w/ them !! i would love to see so feel free to @ me :’+) have fun and tysm for using my sims :’+)!!
personal questions
Can i be your friend?
ofc nonny :+) !! ill prob reply slow af but i promise you that i would love to make friends :+) so hmu whenever you feel comfortable !!
How do you deal with perfectionism? Or what ever that word is????
honestly, tk wrote a perfect post outlining what she does and it helped me out a lot as well !! so check her post out + hopefully it can help you a bit too :+) if you ever need someone to talk to, im here :’+)
would it be ok if I asked u for friendship advice?
ofc nonny :+) !!! just hmu off/on anon in my inbox or pm if you wish :+) im always willing to help as long as you’re a little patient w/ me since i reply quite late haha but im always here to listen + give my 2 cents :+)
I find it so hard to study, I get distracted so easily and sometimes it isn’t my phone :(
awh man nonny i know what you mean. i struggle w/ studying a lot and i’m a uni student haha. besides the typical tips you can find online, what i found is this app called forest (it’s on ios + android devices!!) to help me stay on task (whether it’s studying/chores). check out more information here. it’s been honestly helping me a lot + who doesn’t like plants??? 
I don't know who to tell this to and you seem really kind: I'm the pickiest eater I've ever met or heard of. It's just NO most food is disgusting it just makes me wanna barf. And everyone treats me like a 4-year-old child. Nothing cheers me up anymore. I think I have selective eating disorder and nobody understands :( People are being mean to me all the time because I don't like certain foods and maybe I AM just a 4-year-old child. I need help and comfort :( Because being a picky eater is hard.
awh nonny first thank you for telling me about that :’+) im really sorry if im replying this super late asldkjf. i honestly really appreciate that you opened up to me about it okay? i know this can be difficult since it’s smt so personal. i want to let you know right now that i’m always here for you + supporting you okay? i know it’s difficult when your surrounding group of people don’t understand / support. although i haven’t personally dealt with this, i would suggest finding a professional + see what their take on it? if it’s to the extent that certain food makes you barf, it’s def more than just “wow ur picky” yeuno? cause you physically can’t eat smt without barfing it all out. seek a professional when you’re more comfortable okay? you dont have to do it now but baby steps!! remember you’re not alone, im always here for you oaky nonny :+) every step of the way!! lmk + update me okay? i’m wishing you luck ily !!
my moms having her 4th child and like im really nervous abt it cause this is the first time im actually old enough to like remember it and take care of him and like im scared
!! nonny thank you for coming up to me + telling me about it - i honestly really appreciate it :’+) !! first of all: congrats !! i know things will definitely be different since there are responsibilities to deal w/ and added stress but remember !! to take it slow okay? it’s 100% okay to make mistakes. it’s 100% normal to feel overworked. there will prob be more little arguments here and there since everyone will be quite restless + more irritable but take it slowly + (literally) baby steps okay? if it gets too much for you, take a breather and come back to it. im sure your mom will understand if it gets too much for you. and besides - im here supporting and rooting for you too nonny :+) !! i honestly cant imagine taking care of another human being at this age either - heCk i can’t even take care of myself askdjhf but remember it’s a learning curve!! it’ll take awhile + there will be a lot of obstacles to huddle through but it’ll be rewarding okay? again, if u ever need someone to talk to, im always here :+) !! ily nonny!! stay strong
Hi! I'm really sorry to bother you rn, but I just really, REALLY miss my dog who passed away several years ago. She was like my sister... I related to her more than people & I could always rely on her for comfort. All I want to do is just hug her again, but I know I can't do that. I just can't move on. I love her so much. I'm sorry, but I need to tell this to someone, ANYONE, because it's really been keeping me down lately...(dog death anon cont.) I've been seeing a therapist since she's died, and I've been on several medicines which DO help, but only to a certain degree. I realize there's a certain part that I, myself, need to control (ie moving on). but like I said, it's hard. I haven't told anyone this, because I'm afraid of looking stupid for letting my dog's death get to me this much that it's required hospitalizations and such. I just want to see her again. (end)
!!!!! asdf you’re never a bother nonny !! dont ever thing that alright? i’m always here for you ready to listen no matter what (i’m just a super slow replier so i apologize for that askdhf). but first thank you for coming to me + telling me about your personal problems - i honestly appreciate sm. i’m honestly so sorry nonny... i can relate to some extent because i got my dog when i was in gr 7 and he was my only friend who i can go to to feel love + comfort up since i’ve been bullied since elementary school & never really had friends. i can’t imagine what you’re going through .. i’m honestly so sorry. don’t think that you’re stupid at all okay? i’m the last person on the earth to ever think you are. i’m glad you’re seeking a therapist right now !! however, i 100% understand if it’s difficult to move on - cause it is!! my grandpa past away 10 years ago and he was one of my best friends and he was really the only “father figure-like” role model i look up to. till this day my heart aches thinking about my grandfather and how much i miss him. similarly, i would definitely feel the exact same way w/ my dog if he passed away because i treasure him sm. so don’t be too hard on yourself about moving on. i know it’s easier said than done but different people vary on how long they mourn for. some can be 100% okay in a couple months while others takes years - and that’s 100% okay! why? because we’re human. there’s no need to rush in “moving on” - take it in your own pace. i know the pressure / stigma of others thinking you’re “weird/stupid” for being like this state further creates anxiety/stress in “forcing” yourself to rapidly wanting to move on. however, i urge to try your best to ignore what others might think + focus on yourself to the best of your abilities. perhaps distract yourself in finding a new hobby / doing smt that you love or smt new. it takes time to recover - no matter how long you take, no one’s rushing you oke :+)? ill be here every step of the way if u ever need me. it’s okay to have those days where you tried so hard but u end up at point A because after you go through that hurdle, you’ll be closer to your goal. take as long as you need - baby steps nonny :+) i’m here rooting for you oke? i love you so much. you’re a strong sweetheart and i know you can do it. 
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elftwink · 6 years
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“I may have accidentally sort of adopted five cats.” + violet/arkady pls :0!
and they were roommates! violet is a uni student and arkady works full time and they live together and i didn’t think much farther than that. they’re not dating but there’s some Mutual Pining™ bc they are definitely extremely gay
Violet’s in class when Arkady texts her.
hey, the text reads, when u get home let me explain before u get mad
And it’s not like she’s paying a lot of attention to this linguistics class (she tries to, she really does, but the professor is so hard to listen to and Brian seems to regard basically re-teaching her everything “studying” for him, so she’s actually doing pretty good), but after a text like that, concentration goes totally out the window.
Violet: What?
Arkady: dw nothing’s broken and im not in trouble its not an emergency
Violet: What
Arkady: its just a long story you’ll be on my side i promise
Violet: what!
Arkady: if u say what one more time i will leave u on readArkady: i’ll explain as soon as ur here
Violet huffs in irritation, and considers tapping Brian’s shoulder to see what he has to say about what on earth this could possibly mean, but considering she’s sort of relying on him for notes later, it seems ill-advised to bother him now. Also, she’s pretty sure the professor knows she sometimes just plays tetris in the lecture so drawing his attention seems like a poor choice.
Violet: ok
She considers sending a second text to clarify that that’s an irritated okay and not a resigned or accepting okay, but figures Arkady is smart enough to pick up on it. Violet taps her pencil so much that the girl next to her leans over to tell her to stop. She does, changing the nervous tic to another one— the end of her pencil is entirely chewed up by the end of the lesson.
She’s about to bolt when Brian seems to materialize behind her. “Hey, Sana wanted me to ask you— and Arkady of course— if you would wanna see a movie on saturday? Not sure what we’re going to see, but me and Krejjh are in already.”
“Uh, yeah I’ll— sorry this saturday? I think I have a, like, presentation thing?” No, that’s friday. Violet shakes her head like that’ll help her clear it. “Wait. No I’m good saturday. I’ll ask.”
Brian squints at her for a second. “Violet, are you good?”
“Yeah! Yeah I’m fine. Arkady just sent me this stupid cryptic text message and I’m a little preoccupied with it. But I’m fine.” Violet puts on a sort of strained smile. Brian raises an eyebrow, and Violet takes a deep breath. “She basically just said ‘when you get home don’t get mad’ which, I’m overthinking I know, but who says that?”
Brian laughs. “Yeah. sounds like her. If it makes you feel better, I think it’s probably pretty minor. I think if it was something really serious she would have just told you.”
“Arkady serious or Violet serious?”
“Probably Arkady serious.” Brian tries to look sympathetic, but it sort of falls short when he’s still smiling.
“That’s what I’m afraid of.” Violet sighs, and stuff her notebook back into her bag. “Okay. I’m gonna head home and deal with whatever this is. I’ll let you know about saturday.”
“Good luck!” says Brian, and then Violet is out the door. The drive to her apartment building is spent trying to drown out worrisome thoughts by blasting music as loud as she can. It doesn’t not work very well.
She’s in the building when she texts Arkady again.
Violet: I’m in the elevator so whatever thing u did u gotta have an explanation for it in two minutes
Arkady leaves her on read, which sort of standard when Arkady doesn’t have anything to say. She’s notorious for doing that, and for not replying for hours and hours, so Violet’s prepared and doesn’t think much of it. It’s an exaggeration, anyway; Arkady’s always replied very quickly to Violet when she’s had something to say.
When Violet reaches their room, she halts, hand on the doorknob, and silently hopes that whatever this is, it’s a fixable problem, before pushing open the door and heading inside.
Arkady is on the couch with her laptop open, and when Violet comes in she snaps her head up from the screen.
“Close the door or you’ll let them out.”
On the couch— and two on Arkady— are a bunch of impossibly small kittens. Violet closes the door behind her and makes a gesture vaguely at the couch, eyes wide. Arkady could not look less put out by this, even though they have a large amount of animals in their definitely no pets allowed apartment building.
“So. I may have accidentally adopted five cats.”
“Accidentally?” Violet’s voice cracks from nerves and it’s definitely a little louder than normal.
“Keep your voice down!”
“Accidentally?” hisses Violet again, this time in a whisper. The walls in this building are too thin to be talking about things that could get them evicted at a normal volume. “How do you accidentally take home five kittens? How is that an accident!”
“I didn’t set out to get them. I didn’t go to a pet store or anything.” Arkady picks up one just as it tries to crawl across her laptop, scratching it behind the ears as she puts it down on the couch beside her.
“We’re not allowed to have them in the apartment.” Violet takes off her parka and her boots, pointedly not looking at Arkady or the cats. No attachments.
“Violet, they were outside in a box. We’re getting into negative degrees out there, it’s not like I could leave them.” As if to emphasize Arkady’s point, one of the kittens lets out the tiniest meow Violet has ever heard before laying down and curling up into a ball. Violet groans and puts her head in her hands.
“We could get evicted, Arkady.”
Arkady closes her laptop lid and puts to to the side, letting one of the kittens crawl up into her lap. “They’re pretty quiet actually. I don’t think we’d get caught.”
“What about when I’m at school and you’re at work? Are we just gonna let five cats run around our apartment?”
“Yeah, pretty much,” says Arkady, and Violet grits her teeth.
“Arkady!”
“I know.” She continues to sound not even slightly sorry, which is super not helping Violet’s rising anxiety. Instead, she holds up the cat on her lap— it’s all brown, except for one spot on its nose and the end of its tail. “Look how cute it is though.”
The cat looks at Violet with wide eyes and opens its mouth like it’s going to meow, but only manages a squeak. She swears it’s pleading with her, and it’s all too easy to imagine that same tiny face looking up from a cardboard box.
Damnit. Damnit damnit damnit.
“That’s not fair,” sputters Violet, trying desperately to not look at how cute it is. “That’s manipulation.”
“Yep,” agrees Arkady cheerfully. When Violet glares, she sighs, and drops the smile. “I’m not saying we keep them forever. We can start looking for homes for them. But I don’t wanna put them back outside.”
Violet is silent for a very very long moment, but it’s pretty obvious to both of them what she’s decided long before she says anything.
“Fine.”
Arkady’s face lights back up, and though Violet’s nerves aren’t totally settled, she can’t help but smile too.
“Great! This one is called Diana, and the one with the white paws is Rocket, and—”
“Did you name them all already?”
“No.” Arkady scoops up the kitten to her left with one white ear, drawing a very small meow of protest before it settles into her arms again, and heads over to Violet. “Left this one in case you wanted to name one.”
“Oh. Uh.” Violet desperately tries to find something good to name a cat, which seems like an awful lot of responsibility to thrust on her with no warning like that, and blurts out the first thing to come to mind. “Uh. Uhm. Curiosity?”
Arkady stifles a laugh. “As in ‘curiosity killed the cat’?”
“Oh. Shit. Okay I can come up with something better—”
“No, no—” Arkady does laugh this time, shifting how she’s holding Curiosity so she can put a hand on Violet’s arm. “I like it.”
The sincerity almost takes Violet off guard. Arkady’s expression is open and genuine and her hand is warm against Violet’s skin and Violet is silent just a little too long.
“Uh. Thanks.” The moment is over. Arkady drops her hand like Violet’s scalded her, and Violet takes a tiny step back when she notices how close they were standing. “Jeeter wanted me to ask if we want to go see a movie on saturday,” she blurts out, trying to distract from the sudden odd tension.
“What movie?”
“I dunno. You’d have to ask Sana.” Curiosity meows in Arkady’s arms, and Violet switches her gaze to the cat, reaching over to pet it. “I can’t believe you talked me into this.”
“You’re welcome.” Arkady grins, way too proud and a little mischievous. And while Violet’s eviction worries have not been totally quelled, and not that she’d actually say so out loud, but it might be worth the risk when Arkady smiles like that.
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gohyuck · 7 years
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Sleepovers with NCT Dream
anon asked: Am I allowed to request sleepover/slumber parties with NCT Dream? Just somethin cute n fluffy
okay so i’m not sure if this is like each individual member or with the group as a whole so i did...both? 
uh for each of them the other members aren’t present because just...assume that the specific member kicked them out for the night or they dont wanna bother member/reader haha
under the cut
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mark
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“fight me mark lee”
you regret the words like...as soon as they leave you because the moment you finish your sentence you get a face full of pillow
youd forgotten your clothes in the excitement of being able to sleepover at your boyfriend’s so long story short you’re decked out in one of his thinner t-shirts and a pair of his sweatpants
moments before disaster (aka The Pillow) struck you’d been chilling out on the couch and you both were pigging out just watching tv or something 
then mark decided to s t e a l a c h i p f r o m y o u r b o w l 
you couldn’t just TAKE THAT 
so yeah you mouth off and then get pillowed in the face and after the initial shock wears off you kinda just calmly get up and walk slowly towards the kitchen counter to put your food away so it doesnt spill
all the while mark is shaking in his boots the fear is BUILDING
because hes going over the scenarios of what you might do next in his head he doesnt notice you discretely picking up a pillow
he does feel it tho when you hit him upside the head with it
W A R ensues its like... Armageddon 
until you pin mark down because hes laughing way too hard to fight back
“cry uncle” “NEVER” tickles him once “uNCLE”
he calls for a truce and you give him one with a warning about stealing food and hes like ok fine ill get my own chips next time and you guys resume watching the movie
his arms around you and youre just using him as a headrest/backrest and its overall a really soft time tbh
mark is really comfortable tbh
and you guys have been dating for a while (dream’s parents) so it’s just like a normal date, practically
its just really chill like you guys dont do much other than marathon movies and pillow fight and pig out 
and make small talk 
and steal kisses
playing random games like ispy or something just seems like a mark thing
planning future hang outs and dates lol
“hey on our next date im taking you out to dinner” “and a movie” “you bet” “mark i was kiddi-” “its my treat”
it gets late fast though (time flies when you’re having fun) and you notice this and look over to say that maybe you guys should sleep only to find your bf knocked out on the other side of the couch
again
you cant help but smile at the sight
he’s so overworked, you don’t have the heart to wake him up
instead you turn off the tv, put up all the foodstuffs and clean the area quickly, put the pillows up and lay a pillow out on the ground by the couch and find a blanket and then turn off the lights before lying down
when mark wakes up the next morning he wakes up before you and sighs before stepping over you lightly to brush and stuff and to pour cereal for the two of you (hes not even going to TRY to cook)
once you wake up hes like “why didnt you wake me i wouldve taken the floor” and youre just like “yeah thats why i didnt wake you” and he just shakes his head because he cant argue with you and honestly hes
kinda touched, just a little
you have to leave all too soon but you dont go before getting a goodbye kiss and a promise to have another sleepover very soon
just....soft..soft times
renjun
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board game central
hes just 
head in the game lolol (dont kill me for that joke)
monopoly? clue? sorry? you name it he’s got it like...this boy doesn’t play when it comes to board games
no pun intended
the first half of the night is just you guys playing random board games as best you can with just two people
and then he brings out the chess board
that’s when it gets bumpin tbh
by bumpin i mean you and your boyfriend nearly wring each others throats during the match...but with your minds...because neither of you are speaking you’re THAT concentrated
it’s.....2 hours long
and in the end you guys have to call a draw and like you sit back and just stare at each other blinking and eventually renjun speaks
and his voice is hoarse because neither of you have spoken in a while and the first thing he says (very matter-of-factly, too) is “i’m going to flip the board now”
and you just go “go ahead” hoarsely as well because you’re just in mild shock that nobody won that intense ass match
he flips the board and looks up and stares at you and you stare back and suddenly the two of you are crying of laughter like
majorly uncontrollable you’re just rolling on the floor wheezing 
after you both calm down renjun goes to the kitchen to find something to eat and he’s like “it’s 1 in the morning oh my god we haven’t even eaten dinner what the heck” and that sends you into another fit of laughter
“wait but we still have to have like a pillow fight and watch dumb romcoms and horrors and stuff we have so much to do and so little time” “renjun we don’t have to do all the cliche sleepover stuff” “ok but consider this: itll be fun” “its like ass thirty in the morning though/??” “are you saying we cant do it because if so now we HAVE to do it” “...you get the pillows i’ll get the popcorn put the worst movie you can find into the dvd player”
after a few movies its like 5: 30 am and the two of you are still awake
“are you still up” “no are you” “no”
neither of you wants to be the first to fall asleep
competitive couple af
you guys start a two person game of truth or dare and it ends up getting mushy because for a truth renjun asks you like how you knew you wanted to date him
and you get serious and stuff (which he didn’t foresee he expected an answer like “well you look like moomin and like....i love moomin”) and you come at him with like “when i started noticing that your eyes sparkle when you sing and just how happy you make other people and how you love what you do and how-”
he attacks you with a massive hug because oh my god you’re so sweet he’s getting a cavity 
“i like you a lot, you know”  “i’d hope so i just ate like 90% of your snack stash renjun”  “i take that back”
you guys are still awake when mark comes back to the dorm
when he gets out of the shower, however, is a different story - you and renjun are dead asleep while sitting on the couch, awkwardly wrapped around each other
a photoshoot courtesy of mark’s phone camera ensues
(mark goes to sleep to ice cubes in his pillow that night, courtesy of you and renjun)
jeno
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king of planning 
like he mentally knows everything that can and will go wrong and stuff and knows where the extra pillows and blankets are and is aware of what you’re gonna wanna do and just...he Knows
the first thing you guys do when you get to the dorm is bake brownies 
he makes sure to take videos of the whole process and send them to the other members
jeno: guess what yall are missing out on ;) jisung: i hate this family
the kind of bf to try to feed you the brownies and get the food literally everywhere but your mouth
for as put together as he is you guys end up having brownies and ice cream for dinner lol neither of you can be bothered to cook dinner
“babe should we order out” “i mean you can if you want to” “...but jenoooo that means getting up and getting to my phone” “that’s what i thought”
has a cache of games and movies and shows 
“take your pick”
you guys end up playing random card games like ERS or blackjack for a while 
it honestly is never boring tho because you and jeno are just so comfortable with each other every moment is great no matter what you’re doing
i feel like jeno’s the kind of guy to call his SO a bunch of cute nicknames like he just wants you to know how cute he thinks you are and he does that thru nicknames
“love...” “babe...” “sweetheart...”
after a while though you run out of card games to play and jeno’s about to suggest watching something on tv when he sees your expression
“...what’s on your mind” “...we could mess with your members a little...” “prank calls?” “you know me so well”
within an hour the two of you have convinced yuta that aliens are real and can use cellphones and gotten taeyong to believe that “swag” is a polish swear word and that donghyuck needs to be punished whenever he says it
and jaemin thinks he’s being relentlessly contacted by clowns from a circus in the next town over who think that he’s stolen their tiny car
you guys pass more time just talking and stuff 
and putting on songs and dancing to them it’s Good Fun
he makes you take his bed and sleeps on the floor in a sleeping bag 
you feel awful about it though so when you’re sure he asleep you go find the other sleeping bag and take your pillow and sleep beside him on the floor
he’s super shook when he wakes up but when he realizes that you didn’t want him to be lonely on the floor his smile is as bright as the sun
texts his friends for help on how to cook a nice breakfast
jeno: yo does anyone know how to make breakfast haechan: yeah jeno: cool what are the directions haechan: i didn’t say i’d give them to you
by this time you’re awake and just like “ok let me handle breakfast” 
the two of you just end up eating plain rice and eggs (because you aren’t confident in your kitchen skills) and giggling over the crappy pictures you’re taking of each other eating 
all in all the perfect date/sleepover
haechan
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the moment you walk in the first thing that happens is that haechan pulls you into a hug
the second thing that happens is he holds you at an arm’s length, looks you straight in the eyes, and goes “we have to make a pillow fort”
you 100% agree it’s a necessity 
after putting your bag down on the kitchen he basically drags you to the living room 
the couch gets pushed back against the wall, the coffee table is moved to the side and chairs are moved back so there’s just a big floorspace directly in front of the tv 
“let’s use four chairs as like pillars to hold up the blankets and bring all our food, phones, everything in so we don’t have to leave the fort the whole night” “i like the way you think.. we should go out some time, get to know each other better” “hyuck we’re dating”
i feel like haechan’s the type to be reserved with pda and stick to handholding (only sometimes, even then) because he’s embarrassed around the other members because they like teasing y’all
BUT when you guys are alone he’s totally different 
like after the fort is finished and there are blankets above your heads and you’re both changed into makeshift pjs (just shorts and shirts tbh) and theres pillows around the fort’s perimeter and the tv is on he’ll like
grab whatever you’re currently eating and hold it up and whenever you lean over to reach it he’ll just lean back or move it just out of your reach again
“give it backkkk” “only if you kiss me” “...honestly i was going to do that anyways but now that you’re asking i don’t want to”
leaning into him and him closing his eyes because he expects a kiss and his arm naturally lowering lolol you grab the food and move back without even a peck on the cheek
a pouty haechan emerges
he wont talk to you again unless you kiss him and youre like ugh this big baby
but you dont wanna spend the whole night conversationless so you comply and he pulls you in
suddenly yall are rolling around in the fort laughing and having a play fight just cute af tbh
“hey hyuck we have approximately 9 hours before the other guys come back and i have to go and we have to sleep sometime so we basically have 3 hours to pull some amazing prank” “not to worry, sweetheart - i already have an idea”
and thats when you two set about to turn literally everything upside down in everyone’s rooms 
it takes forever because he puts music on while you guys are working and you both end up ballroom dancing to michael jackson
once its done neither of you can breathe from laughing so hard 
he makes a really quick dinner and the two of you eat it in the fort
while trading stories from the past couple weeks
“so you’re telling me she just...drank the entire cup of coffee after pouring two monster energies into it” “yeah she straight up chugged it i was in AWE”
all of this is done facing each other while holding hands on one side and eating with the other
“hey is that my shirt” “might be? i just found it in my drawers” “it’s definitely mine” “no wonder it’s so soft”
you guys fall asleep really late (or early, depending on how you look at it) because you spend so much time just TALKING
there’s 80s movies playing on the tv in the background
you fall asleep on your pillow but wake up like sideways using haechan’s chest as a footrest or something just...weird sleep position couple
the two of you wake up to confused exclamations from the other members
“hey maybe we should eat breakfast somewhere else so they don’t kill us for the upside downness” “get your keys i’ll grab money” 
jaemin
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buys a telescope just for your sleepover
“what’s the point of having a roof if you can’t climb on top of it and stargaze”
has you go up the stairs to the roof first so he can keep a steady hand on your back since the stairs are narrow
you guys have to make like three trips up and down from the roof before settling down
the first trip you guys set the telescope and blankets up and you go down because you need to go back and bring the food up
the second time is because you have to bring pillows up
the third time is because jaemin forgets his phone oops
its still kind of light out when you guys get up on the roof so you pass time by taking selfies and talking and stuff
its cold af outside and youre freezing despite your jacket so jaemin bundles the both of you up in a blanket (or 4) 
“so the best time to watch the meteor shower is between midnight and dawn but we can just look at other cool spacey stuff before then” “why would i look at other stars when the brightest star is right in front of me” “that’s the cheesiest thing i’ve ever heard i’m breaking up with you” “aw jaemin you know you love me”
you have to stop him from trying to eat what is essentially just a whole bunch of tomatoes in rice paper in one bite
jaemin forgets to bring games up to the roof and hes too lazy to go downstairs and get anything
youre not bored anyways tho
once it gets darker you guys start pointing out some cool stars and constellations
“babe it’s orion’s belt” “nana look at that star, it looks so bright!” “almost as bright as you” “i already said that about you earlier, try again”
play fighting over the telescope
he lets you look first though
when the meteor shower starts you’re both in serious awe
“can you believe that we’re so small and just..tiny and pliable and insignificant in this universe and there are huge things like meteors just streaking through this vast space of nothingness and just wow” “i’m just glad i exist at the same time as you” “jaemin that’s...that’s not even corny or anything that’s just super cute i can’t even make fun of you for it” “it’s true, though”
both of you forget to take videos of the shower
because you’re just enthralled with the fact that the literal sky is like...on fire and shit
jaemin the type to press chaste kisses to your cheek and pull you ever closer to him at random intervals
Soft BF Alert
eating dinner while watching
he points at like every meteor and is like “look at it goooo”
“gotta go fast” “jae if it was possible to literally delete somebody i’d do that right now...blocked” “you love me”
sings under his breath and you record a vid of him doing it without him knowing because its so cute and just...hes so good at singing youre shook
once it starts getting really late and youre yawning and stuff hes like ok maybe we should go downstairs and sleep
it takes two trips to get everything back down to the dorm rip 
at least jaemin doesnt forget his phone this time
once you guys get back neither of you can decide who gets the bed
“you can have it babe i sleep here everyday” “no way i cant do that to you, ill take the floor i practically live here its like home”
its wayyy too late to argue tho you both end up sharing the bed
overall an amazing date like???? meteor shower AND a sleepover with your bf in one night?
thats one successful night
chenle 
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theres an unspoken meme war between the two of you
like nobody really mentions it its there...looming...constantly...
meme war as in you guys constantly taken ABSOLUTELY HORRENDOUS pictures of each other and use them as reaction images
throughout the night each of you take/send pics of each other to the other dream members 
“we should cuddle” “ok how do i know youre not gonna like...lick me or something for a picture of my expression” “you...well you dont but-”
you convince him to watch the ouija movies that are out
he makes it through them but like...
chenle’s either screaming throughout the whole movie or totally shell shocked and you’re just lol @ him
“this isn’t even that scary” “speak for yourself” “i am - come out from under the blanket babe i swear it’s not that scary”
after the movies he’s like “im never letting you choose what to do ever again ever” and you get him saying it on video for the Jokes
its his turn to choose
his immediate response is karaoke
chenle sets everything up for it while you order in dinner because lbr neither of you are looking up the directions to anything with cooking 
he screams directly into the mic while youre on the phone to test it
(and takes a pic of your eyes going wide and you jumping a little bit)
“is everything alright on your side” “yeah just ...make that three orders of chicken im gonna be eating my woes away tonight”
chenle gets out the hoverboard and tries to teach you the dance moves to chewing gum
that quickly stops because you fall onto him
twice
within a span of four and a half minutes
nobodys there to roast though so you guys laugh as hard as you want
a lot of screaming
you love his laugh its so bright and happy just!!! wow
ngl since you started dating him his laugh kind of influenced yours so you laugh a lot louder than you did before chenle
when your food comes in youre too busy screaming lyrics to a song to get the door so chenle grabs the food
and tips the deliveryboy even more than he usually would 
“you’re going to scare away the neighbors with that singing” “i’m surprised people still live here after you moved in chenle, dolphin sounding little-”
eating on the floor while facing each other
“close your mouth while chewing” “ok hon but to tell me that you spoke while eating” “listen, zhong chenle-”
having a staring contest 
loser has to wash dishes
spoiler alert: you lose because he starts smiling and you cant stare straight at him when he smiles without smiling back and blinking really hard its like looking straight at the actual sun
hes super loving and cuddly so while youre washing dishes chenle backhugs you instead of cleaning up the karaoke equipment
“yah you’re sidetracking me” “we should dance instead of being boring and washing dishes like an old married couple” “you can dance while i’m being productive”
he does just that - tries to sidetrack you EVEN MORE by dancing ridiculously while you try to wash dishes 
ends up in a soap and water fight 
i feel like chenle would sleep a little earlier than the other guys so when youre done cleaning up your (late) dinner and hes done mopping the floor of the remnants of soap hes like maybe we should sleep
you agree because its almost like 1 am and youre tired too
pulling out a big family size sleeping bag in the middle of the living room floor and finding pillows
putting on light instrumental sleep music
waking up to chenle taking like a million pictures of your terrible bedhead and sending them to all of his friends
chenle’s just so fun to be around alfskjdk
jisung
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ngl i feel like the night would start off just a little bit awk with jisung
like not awkward to where no conversation is being made awkward just more like small talk while sitting a good foot away from each other on the couch and friends is running on the tv in the background awkward 
you get tired of that really fast tho
bc you and jisung have been best friends for a g e s it shouldnt be like this
so you bean him with a throw pillow
straight upside the head like hes an alarm clock that wont shut up
it takes him a second to react but once he does its chaos 
he hits you back with like twice as much speed and power
suddenly both of you are on the floor fending for yourselves while trying to attack the other
you fight valiantly but hes just
so dang tall that eventually he grabs the weaponized pillow right out of your hand and holds it way high above your head
“checkmate” “...oh shut up :/”
after that though its a lot more comfortable like you settle into your usual pattern of relentlessly teasing each other
“lets put on mickey mouse cartoons jisung you’ll be able to relate” “are you even tall enough to see the tv” “not everyone can be a beansprout”
jisung pops popcorn for the movies and instead of eating it while watching the movie the two of you just throw kernels at each other and laugh at how dumb the other looks with popcorn in their hair
after a while jisung’s like “we should go out back there’s like... a singular tree and some grass and we can just chill” and you’re like well that’s new in the city so it’s a good opportunity so you agree
bringing a needle and thread outside so you can sew together flower crowns of leaves, grass, and dandelions
jisung leans against the tree while watching you make a mildly lopsided crown 
he cant help but laugh when you put it on his head
“hold on im gonna take a picture” “do i look like a beautiful princess” “like a model, jisung, the prettiest princess ever” “will you be the frog to my princess?” “that’s the worst pick up line i’ve ever heard i’m considering taking back my flower crown”
you almost go inside after that but jisung’s like wait what about a flower crown for you
and you’re like oh i forgot i wasn’t really focusing on making one for myself haha
so jisung takes the needle and thread and makes you one
it’s not as pretty as the one that’s on his head but itll do
taking like 20 selfies together with the flower crowns before going back inside
after that he teaches you some of the nct dances
including stuff from the other subunits
“can you teach me taeil-ssi’s cheerleader dance from paju” “...this lesson is over”
jisung making rice and meat for dinner
you fry vegetables and try your hardest not to make anything explode
afterwards you’re lying down on the couch and he’s on the floor below you
the lights are out and its been a while since theyve been off
youre halfway asleep when
“i know youre my best friend but i think i want to date you”
aaaaand youre wide awake again
“wait, jisung, what?” “i thouGHT YOU WERE ASLEEP OH NO” “did i hear you correctly???” “im so sorry i’ll-” “i like you too you absolute idiot oh my god i cant believe neither of us said anything i-” “-move to cuba and change my name you’ll never have to hear from me again-” “-we are SO DUMB wow okay well we have to get together now its the next logical step-” “-and i’ll cut all connection off and. wait. wait, you like me back?” “-and. dude wait have you not been listening to me at all?? yes??”
and that kids is how you and jisung end up together
jisung texts all of his members before you both really do go to sleep (after an awkward hug and a massive bout of embarrassed laughter) that he finally confessed
you wake up to 89 texts and 2 missed calls 
“taeyong says i have to keep you safe and make sure you eat three square meals a day” “is it disrespectful if i block my hyung and surrogate mother”
!! youre dating park jisung congr a t s
ALL OF NCT DREAM
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you open the door immediately to hug bombardment by chenle and jaemin
mark closes it behind you (and shrugs apologetically) considering you cant because youre sandwiched in between the two other members
the first thing all of you do is eat because haechan’s made dinner (with, as jeno keeps reminding everyone, jeno’s help)
hc: all he did was heat the water jn: but it was necessary and helpful, wasn’t it
the second order of business is to push everything out of the way in the living room so the floorspace is entirely open
there are, after all, eight people there and its getting tight on the chairs 
everyones just like eliminate the seating options and thats best - then everyone will just have to sit on the floor 
you: so whats next rj: lets play monopoly everyone, collectively: NO mk: i still have nightmares from last time
jisung suggests twister and everyone (foolishly) agrees
jaemin calls out the colors and limbs and soon you find your left arm reaching over chenle’s right leg and your legs trapped under jisung’s torso
hc, monotonously but muffled as his face is somewhere under renjun’s right armpit: wow this is so wild
after that ends badly (mark nearly suffocates from jeno’s left foot being literally in his mouth) everyone agrees on never taking a suggestion from jisung again (including jisung) 
you suggest a movie marathon and everyone throws pillows at you because that’s “basic”
jm: what about truth or dare jn: wow nana that’s actually a good idea jm: im going to ignore your tone and take it as a compliment anyways
truth or dare quickly causes everyone to become absolute messes because stuff like this happens -
you: renjun, truth or dare rj: truth you: so if you had to gently caress anyone here’s bellybutton, whose bellybutton would it be rj: i
mark and haechan and chenle can each barely breathe because theyre laughing too hard
meanwhile renjun’s mentally going through his brain files of everyone’s bellybuttons and ruing the day he was born, not necessarily in that order
jeno’s videotaping the entire game for future blackmail
hc: jisung if everyone here was a redwood tree who would you set on fire js: you hc: you..you couldnt have hesitated? for even just a secon d
jn: chenle go out in the street and yodel cl: you didnt even ask me truth or d- jn: do it
by the time truth or dare ends its pretty late but youre all way too hopped up on each others embarrassment and general having fun with friends to sleep
cl: karaoke? hc: karaoke. you: maybe karaoke will be our always
the noise level grows like exponentially once karaoke comes on
and it was already pretty freaking loud to start out with
mark’s halfway through a particularly soulful rendition of eminem’s lose yourself when you take a look at the clock
you: guys its almost 3 in the morning jm: sleep is for the WEAK js: chenle’s been knocked out for at least a half hour jm: exactly
mark and jeno move chenle onto the couch and put a blanket over him while you, haechan, and renjun set up sleeping bags and pillow and blankets on the living room floor 
jaemin and jisung turn the music off and make sure the kitchen and everything is clean (and twister is put away)
you turn off the lights and lie down in the bag between mark and renjun
you: we should do this another time jm: minus the twister everyone: minus the twister
jeno wakes you up by stepping on your stomach the next morning while trying to escape renjun and his Pillow of Wrath
the pillow fight’s a little late but hey
8 am is better late than never
a quick breakfast is had while everyone takes turns brushing/showering/changing and it hits 10 am quicker than expected
everyones sad when you have to go back home but!! you all had fun and thats what counts
youre not surprised when mark texts the group chat later about hanging out again soon
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