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thechaoscryptid · 1 year

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2023 Thoughts

I have a few personal resolutions this year that involve improving myself as a person, of course (making an attempt to get an ADHD diagnosis, get on T, therapy if possible, other misc), but my main goals for 2023 are centered around my relationship with my creativity. Namely:

1. Be creatively selfish: I posted very little new material in 2022 (and most of what I did post was old zine works) and tbh, it was...really nice. It felt good to not be beholden to my stats, and not as hung up on whether or not people liked my writing. It’s been a lot less lonely than I thought it would be, too? Focusing on developing relationships with people I want to know rather than people I “should” know has been such a joy (I’d shout everyone out but we’d be here all day).

In 2023, being creatively selfish looks like:

deleting twitter from my phone so I don’t compare myself to others (I’ll still use it on desktop on occasion)

focusing on the writing I want to do (rather than what the trend is, or what’s popular at the time)

joining fewer events and focusing predominantly on Studio Void’s projects

being relentlessly curious about the specific areas I want to improve in (which include mastering different POVs, developing better plot, and tightening my prose)

keeping more writing to myself/more of my process private, rather than sharing in places I know I won’t feel heard

knowing when a space just Isn’t The Vibe and not feeling bad about curating my spaces in a way that sparks joy (I’m tired! I don’t have the energy for fuckery!)

2. Draft The Ashen Earth: I’m itching to tell Kestra’s story and I’m so excited to finally sit down and draft a novel. I’ve been a writer ever since I was a small child and writing a novel has always been a goal of mine - now I have the skill and drive to achieve it.

3. Submit to at least 5 original work publications: ...and don’t be too upset if I don’t get in. Rejection is a part of the submission cycle and doesn’t mean my writing is bad, it just means it wasn’t right for the publication at this time.

4. Break into the publishing industry: Be it the job I’m applying for today, as part of a lit mag team, or something else, one of my 2023 goals is to carve myself a space in an industry that is related to my passion (writing itself) but will hopefully not kill it.

#personal #2023 goals #i've done a lot of soul searching in 2022 #especially about my relationship to creativity #and honestly #everyone should take a good look at their own #i found out some things about myself i didn't expect #and grew to understand myself more #and! learned to accept criticism a little better!#i'm still not great at it #and i will be upset for a little while after receiving edits or critique #but knowing how and what edits/crits to take #and which ones are Actually Valid #is a skill i'm super looking forward to developing even more

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cozymodeonpoint · 4 months

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senshi fans: learning how to make nutritious meals for themselves

laios fans: down bad

marcille fans: lesbianism

chilchuck fans: putting that man in situations

#this is what I've observed over the past few weeks #it's great #dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #senshi #laois touden #marcille donato #chilchuck #2000+ notes later and I'm starting to think i read y'all to filth #with exception to senshi fans also being down for him #update at 9000 notes: you can like laois for autism reasons and still be down bad #some of y'all in the tags and fics are down bad for laois in mental way #like you want him to be real so you can do brain crazy with him do you understand

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xray-vex · 6 months

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"Like stuff. Don't be someone that doesn't like stuff, and if you don't like stuff, don't be a dick about it."

- David Jenkins

#our flag means death #our flag means death season 2 was fucking legitimately great #like it's been about a month now #and i'm tired of folks still hating on it #if it doesn't make you happy anymore then just go do something else #instead of trying to convince other people to hate it just because you do #ofmd #ofmd s2 #ofmd fan art #i don't like thing #ofmd meme #david jenkins #stede bonnet #mermaid stede

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egophiliac · 2 days

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queen of diamonds, upright + reversed 💎

I've redone this like eighty times, I have to just be done with it now and stop staring at all my mistakes oh no 🫠

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 part 8 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 part 8 spoilers #coming in well after the fact but that's what happens when the art doesn't cooperate #and i just HAD to draw something for vil's ob (re-ob?) because i loved it so much #legit put my hand over my mouth and went “oh!” when i realized what was happening #i thought it was just going to be an idia thing because. y'know. closing out his character arc from episode 6 and all #so this was like. oh! oh we're going to get ALL the inky boys!!!!!#i wonder if this is why we got a malleus flashback so early...#not to mention everyone's dreams?!#i am braced for 90% of the dreams to be kind of jokey/inconsequential because we have SO many characters to get through #and most of the time will probably be spent on our lads (literally) dropkicking their emotional problems #but i am excited to see everyone regardless!#and also kind of terrified! what on EARTH will floyd be dreaming about. do i want to know.#i do but do i want to.#man. they're probably not going to get back to it but i do wonder what silver's dream was #what was he doing when he was like 'wait a minute' and noped right out of there #lilia: here silver i made dinner :)#silver: oh boy this looks great! ...YOU'RE NOT MY REAL DAD #ouuuagh i'm still deep in the blotsauce guys and i'm loving it #come make snowangels in the ink with me it's great

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 4 months

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Lan Wangji Goes To Lotus Pier AU: Part 3: Enveloping Feelings.

(Part 1, Part 2, Part 4 (soon))

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #lan wangji #Yungmeng Jiang training arc AU #I wanted to try out a different paneling style for this one - sorry I'm a day late! (there will still be a post tomorrow to keep on track)#The original 3 panel comic idea was fine but the point of this new schedule was to take time to push myself a bit more.#I was taking a look back through some comic artists I felt inspired by #and I really loved how Lynda Barry fills her gutters with patterns and doodles!#Obviously I'm not going as absolutely wild with it as she does but it was a great exercise!#I truly think the gutters are the most important and most overlooked part of any comic. There's lots going on in that space.#It's the same with timeskips. The implied movement between moments that we don't see changes depending on how wide that gap is #You're here for the funny tags so here's some that ties this time talk together:#I think LWJ was thinking about that second note from day 2 but it took him 7 days of hazing to commit it to paper.#I think he sends it a day later and immediately regrets it. Chasing down the messenger and everything.#You know if something actually happened to his brother he would never ever forgive himself for putting the bad vibes out there.#Third time skip was the hardest because there was so many possible flavours of jokes here. Day 8/9 was a personal favourite.#day 14 was also funny (week by week). I think the debate on 'how long does lwj take to catch feelings' is more or less:#'how long does it take for him to arrive at a particular stage of grief and yearning (and awareness of it all)#This is a symphony. There is an act by act structure. Every day he is fighting to keep his old sensibilities. He is losing so badly.#(I'll be returning to the main comic soon but there is more of this AU to come!)

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audhd-nightwing · 3 months

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things in DC canon i’ll literally never get over

1. dick finds out batman replaced him as robin (without asking him) from the NEWSPAPER and simultaneously finds out bruce adopted a new kid without telling him (to make things worse: bruce didn’t even adopt dick)

2. dick finds out jason died from the newspaper (AGAIN? REALLY BRUCE?) and bruce had the fucking funeral WITHOUT HIM while he was still in space

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pitchblackespresso · 5 months

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Not Her

#the yiga clearly didn't play botw if they thought pulling the memory loss trick on the great plateau was a good idea #and disguised as zelda on top of that #anyway i'm still pretty proud of this comic #zelda #totk #zelda comic #link #yiga clan #light dragon #zelink #my art #my comic

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ofswordsandpens · 4 days

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I fear that "fire bending didn't come easy to zuko" and "zuko isn't a prodigy" (both true) has somehow snowballed into "zuko is a bad or at best average fire bender".... which simply isn't true, especially by the end of book 3

#it certainly doesn't help that pretty much the only other fire bender that Zuko's consistently contrasted with #is his extremely talented once in a lifetime level of a prodigy sister #but guys he's still very powerful #and I will bravely propose that #after seeing the dragons #and Zuko is no longer relying on his anger and rage to fuel his firebending #its not a coincidence that the next two battles that he has with Azula either #end with a stalemate (both Zuko and Azula use the same move on the airship and notably she's blown back further from it than he is!)#and then him winning (she's lost her stability while he's finally found his)#(side side note: I'm of the camp that Azula targeting Katara in the Agni Kai made Zuko the automatic victor because an Agni Kai is #(should be?)#between only the two partaking in it and Zuko WAS straight up wiping the floor with her until that very moment where she targeted Katara #which you know great play on Azula part she knows how to manipulate her brother cause once she released she was losing the Agni kai #Azula simply made the choice to get the throne via the line of succession lol)#ah well #atla #zuko

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perccyjackson · 11 months

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SPIDER-MAN: ACROSS THE SPIDER-VERSE + Art of the Movie excerpts ↳ for @tulipfarm ♡ happy (belated) birthday char!!

#spidermanedit #marveledit #across the spiderverse #tuserchar #miles throwing the puffer off when he's telling his mom he's spider-man... yeah yeah #also the bits about prowler miles ☹️#not having the great power but still taking on the great responsibility i'll cry rn #miles morales #atsv #sv saga #marvel #movies #*gifs #*#atsv spoilers #SO SORRY I'M LATE #BUT HAPPY BIRTHDAAAAAAAAAY CHAR!!!!#HOPE YOU HAD A WONDERFUL AMAZING FANTASTIC SPECTACULAR DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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kimtaegis · 13 days

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three superheroes, anpanman! for @sopekooks ♡

cr. jung-koook

#btsgif #dailybts #btsedit #bts #bangtan #sopekook #hobi #yoongi #jungkook #usersky #usersan #usermaggie #userkelli #tuserandi #raplineuser #*jk #*yg #*hs #*gifs #tw flashing #happy birthday my darling crystal!#can you believe that another year passed already? it's crazy #I hope you have an amaaaaaazing day today #that you're being showered with all the love #that you laugh a lot and eat great food and that people tell and show you how wonderful you are #thank you for being here with me for another year. I'm just. SO very fond of you my angel #even when we don't talk much I hope you know how much I adore you and that I'm always rooting for you #you're my longest bts tumblr mutual that is still here and I love you so much #(this clip was supposed to be in last year's set already but I didn't have the file yet back then! so here it is now!#they're sliding right into your heart <3 jungkook's smile makes my heart melt :(((( )

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inkskinned · 1 year

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one of the things that i think we should pay attention to, socially, about the disney v. desantis thing is that it is really highlighting the importance of remembering nuance.

in a purely neutral sense, if you engage in something problematic, that does not mean you are necessarily agreeing with what makes it problematic. and i am worried that we have become... so afraid of any form of nuance.

disney isn't my friend, they're a corporate monopoly that bastardized copyright laws for their own benefit, ruin the environment, and abuse their workers (... and many other things). this isn't a hypothetical for me - i grew up in florida. i also worked for the actual Walt Disney World; like, in the parks. i am keenly aware of the ways they hurt people, because they hurt me. i fully believe that part of the reason florida is so conservative is because it's been an "open secret" for years now that disney lobbies the government to keep minimum wage down, and i know they worked hard to keep the parks unmasked and open during the worst parts of Covid. they purposefully keep their employees in poverty. they are in part responsible for the way the floridian government works.

desantis is still, by a margin that is frankly daunting, way worse. the alternative here isn't just "republicans win", it's actual fascism.

in a case like this, where the alternative is to allow actual fascism into united states legislation - where, if desantis wins, there are huge and legal ramifications - it's tempting to minimize the harm disney is also doing, because... well, it's not fascism. but disney isn't the good guy, either, which means republicans are having a field day asking activists oh, so you think their treatment of their employees is okay?

we have been trained there is a right answer. you're right! you're in the good group, and you're winning at having an opinion.

except i have the Internet Prophecy that in 2-3 months, even left-wing people will be ripping apart activists for having "taken disney's side". aren't i an anti-capitalist? aren't i pro-union? aren't i one of the good ones? removed from context and nuance (that in this particular situation i am forced to side with disney, until an other option reveals itself), my act of being like "i hope they have goofy rip his throat out onstage, shaking his lifeless body like a dog toy" - how quickly does that seem like i actually do support disney?

and what about you! at home, reading this. are you experiencing the Thought Crime of... actually liking some of the things disney has made? your memories of days at the parks, or of good movies, or of your favorite show growing up. maybe you are also evil, if you ever enjoyed anything, ever, at all.

to some degree, the binary idealization/vilification of individual motive and meaning already exists in the desantis case. i have seen people saying not to go to the disney pride events because they're cash grabs (they are). i've seen people saying you have to go because they're a way to protest. there isn't a lot of internet understanding of nuance. instead it's just "good show of support" or "evil bootlicking."

this binary understanding is how you can become radicalized. when we fear nuance and disorder, we're allowing ourselves the safety of assuming that the world must exist in binary - good or bad, problematic or "not" problematic. and unfortunately, bigots want you to see the world in this binary ideal. they want you to get mad at me because "disney is taking a risk for our community but you won't sing their praises" and they want me to get mad at you for not respecting the legit personal trauma that disney forced me through.

in a grander scheme outside of disney: what happens is a horrific splintering within activist groups. we bicker with each other about minimal-harm minimal-impact ideologies, like which depiction of bisexuality is the most-true. we gratuitously analyze the personal lives of activists for any sign they might be "problematic". we get spooked because someone was in a dog collar at pride. we wring our hands about setting an empty shopping mall on fire. we tell each other what words we may identify ourselves by. we get fuckin steven universe disk horse when in reality it is a waste of our collective time.

the bigots want you to spend all your time focusing on how pristine and pretty you and your interests are. they want us at each other's throats instead of hand in hand. they want to say see? nothing is ever fucking good enough for these people.

and they want their followers to think in binary as well - a binary that's much easier to follow. see, in our spaces, we attack each other over "proper" behavior. but in bigoted groups? they attack outwards. they have someone they hate, and it is us. they hate you, specifically, and you are why they have problems - not the other people in their group. and that's a part of how they fucking keep winning.

some of the things that are beloved to you have a backbone in something terrible. the music industry is a wasteland. the publishing industry is a bastion of white supremacy. video games run off of unpaid labor and abuse.

the point of activism was always to bring to light that abuse and try to stop it from happening, not to condemn those who engage in the content that comes from those industries. "there is no ethical consumption under late capitalism" also applies to media. your childhood (and maybe current!) love of the little mermaid isn't something you should now flinch from, worried you'll be a "disney adult". wanting the music industry to change for the better does not require that you reject all popular music until that change occurs. you can acknowledge the harm something might cause - and celebrate the love that it has brought into your life.

we must detach an acknowledgment of nuance from a sense of shame and disgust. we must. punishing individual people for their harmless passions is not doing good work. encouraging more thoughtful, empathetic consumption does not mean people should feel ashamed of their basic human capacities and desires. it should never have even been about the individual when the corporation is so obviously the actual evil. this sense that we must live in shame and dread of our personal nuances - it just makes people bitter and hopeless. do you have any idea how scared i am to post this? to just acknowledge the idea of nuance? that i might like something nuanced, and engage in it joyfully? and, at the same time, that i'm brutally aware of the harm that they're doing?

"so what do i do?" ... well, often there isn't a right answer. i mean in this case, i hope mickey chops off ron's head and then does a little giggle. but truth be told, often our opinions on nuanced subjects will differ. you might be able to engage in things that i can't because the nuance doesn't sit right with me. i might think taylor swift is a great performer and a lot of fun, and you might be like "raquel, the jet fuel emissions". we are both correct; neither of us have any actual sway in this. and i think it's important to remember that - the actual scope of individual responsibility. like, i also love going to the parks. Thunder Mountain is so fun. you (just a person) are not responsible for the harm that Disney (the billion dollar corporation) caused me. i don't know. i think it's possible to both enjoy your memories and interrogate the current state of their employment policies.

there is no right way to interrogate or engage with nuance - i just hope you embrace it readily.

#does this make sense #to do be deleted probably yikes #(takes a swing at a wasp's nest)#like i think ppl have started to just be really quiet when they like something 'problematic'#and im like... u can be like -#girl tswift NEEDS to just TAKE A BUS . LIKE?????????????????????#while also being like.#''she's a lot of fun''#if ur personal policy is that u don't support her for that reason that's great #but it's like. eating meat???#like yeah some people won't bc the environment. but the fact i eat meat doesn't mean i hate the earth #like i can say that i think the meat industry is HORRIFIC and also downright cruel to its employees #but like. still enjoy a chicken nugget....#there are people who choose otherwise. it's okay . we are people. i make like no money. u probably don't either #us fighting about whether or not it's Right To Eat The Chicken Tender just distracts from like.#actually turning your ire on the corporation #i hope it's clear what i'm saying here is like. when we fight each other for Purity Reasons #we are just doing the work of corporations . for free. like they WANT us to be doing this lol #it's the fucking DREAM of the upperclass that now ALL forms of responsibility fall on the individual

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shatouto · 8 months

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i did a dumb friendly fire and blew off nearly half of astarion's hp (i'm so sorry astarion)

#baldur's gate 3 #bg3 tav #astarion #shadowheart #gale of waterdeep #so what really happened was that: i was supposed to click on astarion in the turn list #except i accidentally clicked on his profile pic. while my spell was still engaged #so.... i hit him. critically #wow guys it's been a few days since i posted this and LMAOO i'm happy to hear i'm not alone #we're all dumdums together eh #thank u for your tags i have great fun reading them #oc: lorame

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iroissleepdeprived · 17 days

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The man, the legend, the Odysseus of Ithaca :)

#i'm still upset about what they did to odypen but his design is great #made this in a car :P #odysseus #odysseus hades #hades 2 #digital art

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lucyvaleheart · 4 months

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lil secret desire of mine is like. i hide my face a lot and I fucking dream about being forced out of that; someone pulling my hands away, or grabbing my chin and making me look at them, or otherwise not letting me hide away

sexually or not that shit slaps so good every fucking time 😵‍💫

#fuckin. soft or violent both are so amazing #sexually context is great #but it's also so fucking good when like. you're sad and want to be comforted #that idea that they still wanna see your face they want you to stop hiding enough to pull you to them #oiughjgg #hi I'm normal and definitely don't have any trauma what are you talking about

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littlegirlinvisible · 1 month

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We can sometimes stop and appreciate the scenery. Then time will gradually being to flow more quickly. Time will slip away, and we won't be able to do anything about it. We'll enjoy all the happiness that life grants us.

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tyamuffins · 1 month

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Fma doodles because I'm currently having fmab brainrot :D

#fmab #fma #fullmetal alchimist brotherhood #fullmetal alchemist fanart #fullmetal alchemist #fma 03 #fanart #edward elric #I need to learn how to draw Al #I'm rewatching fmab and it's still as great as ever!!!#Ed and Al are so precious i love them #winry rockbell #i love my girl winry too #And roy and riza!!!#fma is the best anime ever!!!#art #artist on tumblr

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