#but like. still enjoy a chicken nugget....
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dr. feelgood - chapter twelve
pairing: Surgeon!Bucky x SurgicalIntern!Reader
summary: Y/N has a one night stand with a handsome stranger the night before starting her new job as a surgical intern. Little does she know, the handsome stranger also happens to be her new boss
warnings: must be 18+, drinking, some surgery descriptions, smut, self-pleasure, praise kink, oral sex, unprotected sex, rough sex, PTSD, choking, angst
word count: 3.7k
a/n: ask and you shall receive! I started doing my final proofing and got tired and decided to post so apologies for any typos, I'll fix them later lol. please enjoy this one and thanks for your patience!
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It took exactly three seconds for Bucky to come to his senses. The gentle click of the door shutting brought him back to reality and he realized he couldn’t do this anymore. He couldn’t pretend like his heart didn't skip a beat every time she came into the room. That every time she smiled at him, he completely lost his focus. She was all he thought about, day in and day out, even when he was avoiding her. He wanted a future with her. In fact, she was the first woman he'd ever met that he could see a future with. And he had messed it all up.
What hit him suddenly, as she walked out of the house, was that if he let her go, he was just bringing on more trauma. He would never emotionally recover from losing her. He would be stuck with his PTSD night terrors and would always live life wondering what if things were different. One of the lessons he learned in combat is that life is short and precious, and it shouldn’t be wasted.
“I’m such an idiot,” he mumbled to himself. He flew out the front door, hoping he could still catch her before she took off. It was a monsoon outside, with water pouring down in buckets. He caught the headlights of her car flooding the driveway and he darted toward the vehicle without another thought. He didn’t waste time putting shoes on, running outside in just socks. While wet socks were one of his pet peeves in life, at this moment he didn’t care.
He knocked feverishly on her window before she could put the car in reverse. She was initially startled before she rolled down the window.
“What are you-” before she could finish her question, his hand was around her jaw and his lips were caressing hers. This was the last thing she expected, but she didn’t stop him, wondering if this was the last time she’d feel his lips on hers. He was dripping cold rainwater all over her and the seat of her car but she didn’t even care. She leaned into him, savoring the taste of his gin-coated lips.
He pulled away, leaning his forehead against hers, stealing the breath from her lips. “I’m not giving up on us,” was all he said.
That gave her the confidence she needed. This time she took the lead, placing both hands around his jaw and pulling him closer to her, smiling in between every delicate kiss.
“I’m so in love with you,” he whispered in between kisses and she reacted by holding him tighter and running her fingers through the hair on the back of his neck. “I’m sorry I didn’t fight for us. I just wanted to protect you.”
She pulled away and nuzzled into his neck, “I know, I know Buck. It’s okay.” Their blissful moment was interrupted by the cheerful barking of a golden retriever. Bucky turned around to find Liberty running around in circles in the pouring down rain, sloshing through the mud.
“Well shit,” he chuckled.
“You leave the front door open?”
“Apparently,” he turned back to Y/N and gave her one more quick peck on the lips. “I better wrangle her up, Will you stay? I’ll meet you inside and we can talk?”
She nodded and laughed while he ran off after Liberty, sliding shoeless in the mud as he attempted to usher the dog back inside. Y/N was already half soaked from Bucky’s drippage so she easily made the decision to cut the engine and run inside. She captured Liberty’s attention as she ran to the front door and the dog darted after her. Once Liberty had followed her inside, she knelt down to give the dog some attention and to keep her inside. Bucky ran inside and shut the front door behind him, sliding ever so slightly on the hardwood floor. Y/N smiled up at him as she stood up and he returned her grin. As if on cue, Liberty shook off the moisture from her fur, completely coating Y/N and Bucky in more rain water and mud. They both started cracking up, laughing at both their disheveled states as the dog simply walked off to her dog bed.
Bucky stepped closer to her and placed his hands on her hips.
“You know, this look is kind of working for me…” he said, narrowing the space between them.
“Oh yeah? You into the swamp monster look?” she bantered.
“More like queen of the swamp,” he said, inching closer to envelope her lips in his. Her arms effortlessly wrapped around his neck and he pulled her in even closer, so her body was flush against his. They were cold and wet and muddy, yet there was no place they’d rather be. Bucky couldn’t believe he almost let this amazing woman slip beneath his fingers. He was savoring everything about her now: her smell, her taste, her touch. But what surprised him the most was how at ease he finally felt. The past few weeks, he’d been so tense. He was worried about Y/N, he wasn’t sleeping, barely eating, and just getting by an hour at a time. Now it was like he could finally breathe again. He didn’t realize what he was missing until he had her back. And now he never wanted to let go.
She started to pull back for a breath, but he wouldn’t let her, verbally expressing his dismay with a hummed “uh-uh.” She smiled and he kept her close, kissing her again and then moving from her lips to her cheek to her neck.
“Bucky,” she giggled. He loved hearing that sound and it just encouraged him more. “We should wash the dog before she spreads more mud around the house.”
“I don’t care about that,” he replied.
“But it’s Steve’ house and-”
“I will deal with Steve’s house later. Right now, I’m not letting go of you.” He moved in close again, seeking the soft touch of her lips. And she had no working defense mechanisms. She sighed into his mouth, loving the feeling of being back together with the man she’d been longing for over the past few weeks. But the logical side of her won over in the end.
She pulled away and Bucky shifted his attention to her jaw, planting kisses up toward her ear.
“Okay, I’ll make you a deal…” she offered.
“Mhm,” he replied, opting not to part from her skin.
“If we take a pause to wash up the dog, then we can pick this up later. In the shower.” Bucky froze considering his options. They’d never shared a shower together and it was something he’d always wanted to do but they’d never had the opportunity.
He let out a deep sigh into her neck, “You’re killing me doll.” She gently scratched the back of his neck and kissed his ear, signaling that their make out session was over for the time being. Bucky walked over toward Liberty and effortlessly picked her up in his strong arms. As he walked toward the bathroom he called out, “You better be helping me with this!” Y/N smiled to herself and eagerly ran after him.
It took all four hands to wrestle Liberty into the tub and that was only the first step. It was fortunate that Bucky and I were already soaking wet from the rain because Liberty showered us in bathwater as she splashed around in the tub. It took us a minute to find a rhythm, with one of us rinsing while the other shampooed. After about thirty minutes, I pulled the drain plug and we pried Liberty out of the tub, wrapping her in a towel. Once she was mostly dried off, we gave her a bone which she happily curled up with in her dog bed.
I leaned against the kitchen counter, taking a quick moment to catch my breath, which didn’t last very long. Bucky approached with a smirk on his face and, without a word, swept me up into his arms.
“Bucky!” I called in surprise.
“Pretty girl,” he countered, awfully pleased with himself.
“What are you doing?” I protested, as he started ascending the staircase.
“We’re getting you cleaned up.” Bucky strode into what I assumed was Steve’s bedroom, and before I could argue, he opened the door to the master bathroom and I was speechless. It was spacious to the point where it could’ve passed for a health spa. There was a giant soaking tub next to a window, with tealight candles lined up on the windowsill. Accompanying the tub was an upholstered ottoman holding a tray of bath salts, luxury oils, scrubbing brushes, and any other things you might need during a soak. In the corner was a beautifully tiled walk-in shower, complete with a rain shower head and a built in ledge that could double as a bench. Along the wall was a long countertop, with two sinks placed in front of the giant framed mirror. Before I could take in anymore, Bucky sat me on the countertop next to the sink, like I was a child and he was tending to a scrape on my knee. He walked over to the closet and pulled out two, lush looking, sage green bath towels, and hung them on the silver towel rack that was placed by the entrance of the shower.
“This is…” I said, looking around the room with wonder.
“I know. Steve takes his self care very seriously,” Bucky joked. He turned the handle in the shower and the water started flowing through onto the beautifully laid tiles, mimicking the sound of the rainforest.
Bucky made his way back over to me and I wondered what his next move would be. I was happy to sit back and enjoy the ride of whatever he had in mind. His face hovered in front of mine, as he placed his hands on the counter, his thumbs so nearly grazing my thighs. I studied his face, waiting for him to lean in and kiss me again, so that we could pick up where we left off. Instead, he planted a chaste kiss on my cheek and exited my personal space. His right hand found its way to my thigh and he slowly slid it all the way down my leg, until he was gripping my ankle. He extended my leg and brought my foot up towards his mouth, using his teeth to nip the top of my sock and carefully pull it off my foot. He planted a sweet kiss on my big toe and then repeated the process with my other foot.
Then he moved to my hands, removing the rings and bracelets I had on and placing them carefully in a small bowl on the counter. His slow, calculated movements were turning me on more than I thought they would. As much as I needed to have him, I wasn’t going to rush through this. He removed my earrings, giving one of my earlobes a playful nip, before he pulled off my blouse, planting kisses from my collarbone down to my navel. He came back up to my eye level, but his fingers were already working on the button of my jeans.
“I might need your help with this one,” he said, as he pulled down my zipper. I leaned back onto the counter and lifted my hips, allowing Bucky to pull at the waistband and slide the jeans off my legs. I sat back upright while Bucky kissed his way up my legs, taking a little extra time when he reached my inner thighs. I could see the hunger in his eyes and I knew that this teasing must be killing him, but it would all be worth it. His mouth found my bra strap and took it in his teeth as he lifted up slowly and released it so it snapped back onto my skin. His hands worked their way up my love handles and met at the clasp of my bra.
“Ah ah ah…” I chided, shaking my head before he could continue. He gave me a confused look and I merely pulled at the hem of his shirt, “You are fairly overdressed.” He let me pull the shirt up and over his head and I tossed it across the room. He leaned back in, continuing where I stopped him but I simply shook my head again. I pulled the drawstring of his sweatpants loose and tucked my fingers into the waistband and he effortlessly wiggled out of the material, leaving him stripped down to my level, clad only in his boxer briefs.
“Happy now?” he asked, with a tilt of his head.
“Almost,” I smiled mischievously. He slowly closed his eyes and sent me a toothless smile, knowing what I was getting at. When he opened his eyes back up they locked onto mine like a wolf stalking its prey. It sent a chill down my spine and all I wanted was to feel his hands on me again. He placed two thumbs into the waistband of his boxers and easily pulled them down, stepping out of them and closer towards me.
“You have some catching up to do,” he growled. I smiled as he kissed me, this time with urgency. His hands were behind my back unclasping my bra with ease and it fell to the floor. He started kissing my neck as his hands ventured south and rested on my hips. It didn’t take him long to pull at my thong, and I raised my right hip up to aid him, and he happily accepted the help.
I felt a bit of a breeze and shivered briefly, as my nipples hardened slightly due to the cool air and Bucky’s fingertips. He noticed my momentary shudder and grinned into the kiss.
“Why don’t I warm you up a little,” he suggested, sweetly kissing my jaw before shifting his attention to my pert nipples. He took each one carefully into his mouth, giving them just enough attention and then continued on his journey, eventually kneeling on the ground. I hadn’t realized that’s what he meant, but I wasn’t going to complain. He gently pulled on my legs as a signal for me to come closer which I did. He ran his tongue up my sopping wet pussy to my clit and ran circles around the sensitive bud. My head fell back instinctively, missing the feel of his touch. He dove right into my folds, exploring with his tongue and forcing labored breaths out of me.
“Bucky…” I called, running my fingers through his hair in an attempt to pull him back towards me. He took that as encouragement and increased his efforts, shooting his eyes up to watch my reaction. I let out a soft moan and pulled on his hair harder, which he seemed to enjoy.
“Bucky, stop,” I softly commanded. He immediately stopped and pulled back, looking up to see if everything was okay. “I can’t wait anymore. I need you inside of me.”
He acted quickly, standing and collecting me off the counter with ease, and carrying me into the immaculate shower. The minute we stepped under the water, his lips were back on mine and I tightened my grip on his neck, pulling him as close to me as possible. My legs were wrapped around his torso and his strong hands were cradling my lower back.
“God, I missed you so much,” he whispered into my neck.
“Show me,” I challenged, feeling bolder. Bucky reacted immediately, pressing me into the cold tiles of the shower. I let out an exhale and he took that as encouragement. He expertly shifted my position so that he had a better angle to my entrance, all while keeping me secure. And then he thrusted into me and I almost came on the spot. A moan escaped my lips and Bucky picked up his pace, grunting into my neck.
“Fuck baby,” I let out, knowing I wouldn’t last much longer.
“This one might be quick, but I’ll make it up to you.”
“I don’t care, you feel so good inside of me.” He gave me a quick love bite on my shoulder and then gently returned me to the ground.
“Turn around,” he commanded, caressing my hips with his fingertips. I placed my hands on the shower tiles and bent forward as he pulled my hips toward him.
“You know me too well,” I smiled.
“Of course I know how my girl likes it.” He didn’t give me a warning when he entered me and I let out a squeal of pleasure. He gave my ass a smack before clutching my hips tighter and increasing his rhythm.
“You’re so wet for me, pretty girl. I’ve missed your tight little cunt.” He thrust in deeply and paused, wrapping his hand around my front to play with my clit.
“Ohhhhh…” He was pushing my every button and I was nearing my climax.
“Those noises are driving me wild…” He picked up his pace again and I let out another moan. “Now be a good girl and cum for me.” That was all it took to trigger my orgasm. My back arched and I leaned further into the tile to stabilize myself while Bucky’s hands kept his strong hold on me. It all seemed to happen so quickly, as I panted and tried to bring myself back down to earth.
“Wow…” I breathed through my satisfied smile.
“I second that.” He slowly retracted and took my hand. “C’mere.” He pulled me towards him and wrapped his arms around my waist. I locked my arms around his neck and smiled up at him as he planted a few sweet kisses on my lips.
“That was amazing,” he said, connecting his forehead to mine.
“I know, we’re pretty good at that.”
“And we keep getting better.”
“You think it’s because we’re in love now?” I suggested.
“It has to be that,” he said, kissing my nose. “Also, I didn’t pull out. I’m sorry. I got caught up in the moment.”
“It’s okay, I’m on the pill so we should be fine.”
“I won’t do that without checking with you ever again.”
I placed a hand on his cheek and said, “I said it’s fine.”
“I know, but I still should’ve asked your permission.”
“Well, I appreciate that. Now can we get clean and spend the rest of the night cuddling?”
“We can do whatever you would like my dear.”
Once we finished up in the shower and dried off, Bucky lent me the T-shirt he packed and he put on a pair of sweatpants. We curled up together on the couch and turned on a rerun of Bar Rescue.
I rested my head on his shoulder and he put his arm around me and kissed my temple.
“How are you feeling, pretty girl?”
I tilted my head so that I was looking at him, “Happy.”
“That’s what I love to hear.”
“All because of you,” I smiled.
“Ah, can I bring something up at the risk of ruining the moment.”
“I don’t think anything could ruin this night for me. Unless you break up with me.”
“Well I’m never doing that. But I do think we should talk about that night.”
“Oh. Okay,” I shifted so that I was facing him, giving him my undivided attention. He collected my hands and held them tight in his.
“I know you said you pulled me out of the nightmare, but I don’t want to put you in that position again. It might not work next time. So I’m going to start up therapy again. It did help me a lot before and I only stopped going when I thought I had things under control. But I think it might be more of a lifelong thing.”
I nodded, “I think that’ll be really good for you.”
“It’s really hard for me to ask for help, but I do think it’ll make things better.”
“And I’m happy to go slow as we figure everything out. I want to make sure you feel comfortable with things.”
“Trust me, I don’t want to go slow. I’ve finally got you where I want you. But I can’t let that happen again.”
“We’ll ease back in. No sleepovers for a few weeks.”
“Well I’m not agreeing to that,” he smirked.
“What!?”
“I want to fall asleep next to you every night.”
“Yeah but-” I started to protest.
“I think we can start with staying at your house. It’s not my space and I don’t think I sleep as deeply because it's a different environment than I’m used to. Plus I’ve stayed over your place a handful of times and never had any issues.”
“Are you sure?’
“Positive,” he stated.
“Okay, we can start there and see how it goes.”
“I still want to have a back-up plan for you though. Maybe stash an air horn or something by the bed just in case. I’ll come up with something.”
I chuckled lightly, “I don’t think an air horn is going to work.”
“Why not?”
“Do you want to know what I did the first time?”
“I am curious actually.”
“First, I placed my hand on your cheek,” I announced as I demonstrated. “Then I slowly pulled you in closer,” He moved with my hand until his forehead was pressed against mine. “And then I did this,” I gently brushed my lips against his and he sat there stunned.
“Yeah, that’ll do it,” he commented with a small smile on his face.
“I thought if I fought back you would only push harder but that affection might confuse you.”
“And it worked.”
“It didn’t really confuse you, though. It sort of…calmed you. You curled into me and fell back asleep.”
Bucky looked a little stunned as he considered this, “Smart. That was very quick thinking.”
“That’s why I’m in trauma.”
“I’ll give you that. But I still want some sort of back up plan in place.”
“Well I will let you think on that and come up with a plan because you probably know better than I do on this matter.”
“I can do that. So until we have a back up plan, no more sleepovers.”
“That’s fair.”
“Tonight I’ll let you sleep in Steve’s room with Liberty and I’ll take the guest bedroom.”
She wanted to protest, badly, because she couldn’t imagine leaving his vicinity. But she chose to respect his wishes. For now, she nuzzled into Bucky’s shoulder and entangled her legs with his, enjoying every second of being in his presence.
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one of the things that i think we should pay attention to, socially, about the disney v. desantis thing is that it is really highlighting the importance of remembering nuance.
in a purely neutral sense, if you engage in something problematic, that does not mean you are necessarily agreeing with what makes it problematic. and i am worried that we have become... so afraid of any form of nuance.
disney isn't my friend, they're a corporate monopoly that bastardized copyright laws for their own benefit, ruin the environment, and abuse their workers (... and many other things). this isn't a hypothetical for me - i grew up in florida. i also worked for the actual Walt Disney World; like, in the parks. i am keenly aware of the ways they hurt people, because they hurt me. i fully believe that part of the reason florida is so conservative is because it's been an "open secret" for years now that disney lobbies the government to keep minimum wage down, and i know they worked hard to keep the parks unmasked and open during the worst parts of Covid. they purposefully keep their employees in poverty. they are in part responsible for the way the floridian government works.
desantis is still, by a margin that is frankly daunting, way worse. the alternative here isn't just "republicans win", it's actual fascism.
in a case like this, where the alternative is to allow actual fascism into united states legislation - where, if desantis wins, there are huge and legal ramifications - it's tempting to minimize the harm disney is also doing, because... well, it's not fascism. but disney isn't the good guy, either, which means republicans are having a field day asking activists oh, so you think their treatment of their employees is okay?
we have been trained there is a right answer. you're right! you're in the good group, and you're winning at having an opinion.
except i have the Internet Prophecy that in 2-3 months, even left-wing people will be ripping apart activists for having "taken disney's side". aren't i an anti-capitalist? aren't i pro-union? aren't i one of the good ones? removed from context and nuance (that in this particular situation i am forced to side with disney, until an other option reveals itself), my act of being like "i hope they have goofy rip his throat out onstage, shaking his lifeless body like a dog toy" - how quickly does that seem like i actually do support disney?
and what about you! at home, reading this. are you experiencing the Thought Crime of... actually liking some of the things disney has made? your memories of days at the parks, or of good movies, or of your favorite show growing up. maybe you are also evil, if you ever enjoyed anything, ever, at all.
to some degree, the binary idealization/vilification of individual motive and meaning already exists in the desantis case. i have seen people saying not to go to the disney pride events because they're cash grabs (they are). i've seen people saying you have to go because they're a way to protest. there isn't a lot of internet understanding of nuance. instead it's just "good show of support" or "evil bootlicking."
this binary understanding is how you can become radicalized. when we fear nuance and disorder, we're allowing ourselves the safety of assuming that the world must exist in binary - good or bad, problematic or "not" problematic. and unfortunately, bigots want you to see the world in this binary ideal. they want you to get mad at me because "disney is taking a risk for our community but you won't sing their praises" and they want me to get mad at you for not respecting the legit personal trauma that disney forced me through.
in a grander scheme outside of disney: what happens is a horrific splintering within activist groups. we bicker with each other about minimal-harm minimal-impact ideologies, like which depiction of bisexuality is the most-true. we gratuitously analyze the personal lives of activists for any sign they might be "problematic". we get spooked because someone was in a dog collar at pride. we wring our hands about setting an empty shopping mall on fire. we tell each other what words we may identify ourselves by. we get fuckin steven universe disk horse when in reality it is a waste of our collective time.
the bigots want you to spend all your time focusing on how pristine and pretty you and your interests are. they want us at each other's throats instead of hand in hand. they want to say see? nothing is ever fucking good enough for these people.
and they want their followers to think in binary as well - a binary that's much easier to follow. see, in our spaces, we attack each other over "proper" behavior. but in bigoted groups? they attack outwards. they have someone they hate, and it is us. they hate you, specifically, and you are why they have problems - not the other people in their group. and that's a part of how they fucking keep winning.
some of the things that are beloved to you have a backbone in something terrible. the music industry is a wasteland. the publishing industry is a bastion of white supremacy. video games run off of unpaid labor and abuse.
the point of activism was always to bring to light that abuse and try to stop it from happening, not to condemn those who engage in the content that comes from those industries. "there is no ethical consumption under late capitalism" also applies to media. your childhood (and maybe current!) love of the little mermaid isn't something you should now flinch from, worried you'll be a "disney adult". wanting the music industry to change for the better does not require that you reject all popular music until that change occurs. you can acknowledge the harm something might cause - and celebrate the love that it has brought into your life.
we must detach an acknowledgment of nuance from a sense of shame and disgust. we must. punishing individual people for their harmless passions is not doing good work. encouraging more thoughtful, empathetic consumption does not mean people should feel ashamed of their basic human capacities and desires. it should never have even been about the individual when the corporation is so obviously the actual evil. this sense that we must live in shame and dread of our personal nuances - it just makes people bitter and hopeless. do you have any idea how scared i am to post this? to just acknowledge the idea of nuance? that i might like something nuanced, and engage in it joyfully? and, at the same time, that i'm brutally aware of the harm that they're doing?
"so what do i do?" ... well, often there isn't a right answer. i mean in this case, i hope mickey chops off ron's head and then does a little giggle. but truth be told, often our opinions on nuanced subjects will differ. you might be able to engage in things that i can't because the nuance doesn't sit right with me. i might think taylor swift is a great performer and a lot of fun, and you might be like "raquel, the jet fuel emissions". we are both correct; neither of us have any actual sway in this. and i think it's important to remember that - the actual scope of individual responsibility. like, i also love going to the parks. Thunder Mountain is so fun. you (just a person) are not responsible for the harm that Disney (the billion dollar corporation) caused me. i don't know. i think it's possible to both enjoy your memories and interrogate the current state of their employment policies.
there is no right way to interrogate or engage with nuance - i just hope you embrace it readily.
#does this make sense#to do be deleted probably yikes#(takes a swing at a wasp's nest)#like i think ppl have started to just be really quiet when they like something 'problematic'#and im like... u can be like -#girl tswift NEEDS to just TAKE A BUS . LIKE?????????????????????#while also being like.#''she's a lot of fun''#if ur personal policy is that u don't support her for that reason that's great#but it's like. eating meat???#like yeah some people won't bc the environment. but the fact i eat meat doesn't mean i hate the earth#like i can say that i think the meat industry is HORRIFIC and also downright cruel to its employees#but like. still enjoy a chicken nugget....#there are people who choose otherwise. it's okay . we are people. i make like no money. u probably don't either#us fighting about whether or not it's Right To Eat The Chicken Tender just distracts from like.#actually turning your ire on the corporation#i hope it's clear what i'm saying here is like. when we fight each other for Purity Reasons#we are just doing the work of corporations . for free. like they WANT us to be doing this lol#it's the fucking DREAM of the upperclass that now ALL forms of responsibility fall on the individual
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i think that every time the aa universe equivalent of mcdonalds had steel samurai toys in their kids meal, edgeworth would get himself one as a treat after a trial and sit in the restaurant to eat it but like in the corner so no one sees him
#ace attorney#aa#miles edgeworth#look he just strikes me as the kind of guy that always eats in the restaurant#but in fast food places he always takes the corner seat bc its undignified food#but he still sticks out like bc hes wearing a bright magenta suit in a mcdonalds#also its funny thinking about edgeworth eating his corner chicken nuggets and enjoying his little steel samurai toy#yeah this is a lot of thoughts but i have specific opinions and am also too tired to care rn#so enjoy ig
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if the version of me from this time last year could see how i’m eating now he would be literally floored and i’m so proud of that
#it’s been getting a lot easier to feed myself and food has been bringing me so much more joy lately it makes me so happy#i think it’s primarily from just being way more mentally stable than i was last year + my bf loves cooking and cooks w a lot of foods#that i had never tried before and being w him has really helped me to enjoy feeding myself and enjoy trying new things#i love tofu!! and kale!! and parsnips and sesame oil and lentil pasta and shallots and sweet potatoes and fresh garlic and rice noodles#and goat cheese and feta and vegetarian chicken nuggets#and literally so many things that make me feel good and make me want to cook for myself#i would say i’ve considered myself pretty solidly recovered from my ED since like 2019 but still each year i feel like my relationship#to food improves in new ways and i’m very proud of that
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Hello! I was wondering if you could write a Leah Williamson fic where Leah and famous!reader have been dating for a long time and nobody knows. Basically, reader is seen attending a game and nobody knows why until a fan secretely takes a pic of them at a fancy dinner date (Leah in her SPOTY suit) thus breaking the internet. But Leah and reader only know about it after a night of fun (maybe smut) and make their couple debut.
Apologies for the long essay😅; love your works❤️
Secret’s Out || leah williamson x reader
leah williamson x famous!reader
prompt: requested
warnings: suggestive, a few swear words, mostly fluff
a/n: thank you for the request, hope this is what you were looking for, enjoy! Also thank you that is so sweet!
There was constant attention on your very private life. Tabloids and journalists were desperate to write a dramatic column about anything they assumed was ‘juicy’ or ‘interesting’. Simply just vying for views and money. It made you sick to your stomach. Being in the ‘bright light’, as some people call it, was certainly a privilege, it had blessed you with amazing opportunities and provided you with an income, but it can get tricky very quickly.
Especially when you were dating one of the most famous professional women’s footballers. A woman who captained England in the Woman’s Euros when they won on home soil and leads Arsenal’s defense. The face of women’s football one might say. But to you, she was just Leah. Leah who loved rom-coms films and always cried at the end, Leah who had the palette of a toddler even when you tried to convince her to eat something other than chicken nuggets and smilies. Leah who you were insanely in love with.
Both being very famous individuals in your own industries, it was important for the both of you to keep things just the two of you. As Taylor Swift once said, ‘Romance is not dead if you keep just yours.’ Your close friends and family knew as well as Leah’s teammates but the public was blissfully unaware. You and Leah were approaching two years and it was still a major secret, thankfully.
Things were obviously different in your relationship. You weren’t able to take Leah on the red carpet with you, boast all about your rockstar defender girlfriend on the pitch, or really even hypothetically stand too close before social media would run wild with different rumors. It was not only drama outlets, but also fans. It was easier to be single these days on social media because the fans can become very hurtful and rude when they realize their favorites are ‘off the market’. You didn’t want anyone sending Leah hate and she certainly didn’t want you on the receiving end. It was annoying at times, but you and Leah liked the privacy. You both would choose a night in, cuddled on the couch, watching a film over a loud smelly club or bar any day.
One thing that really hurt your heart with the situation you were in was not being able to outwardly root for Leah at her Arsenal or England games, in person. Sure you would always watch on any device you could when she was playing, but it wasn’t the same as being in person. A combination of busy, conflicting schedules and wanting to avoid any unnecessary extra drama that would certainly take away from the importance of the match always kept you away from the stadium.
You really wanted to attend one of Leah’s matches soon since she has made her return back from her ACL injury. You had seen the daily struggles of her 9 month journey and you knew how important it was for her to be back on the pitch, playing the sport she loves. So you decided to bring it up to her one day after dinner, wanting to hear her thoughts on the subject.
“Hey Lee what are the odds I come to the Emirates when you guys play Man United? My schedule is clear for the day.” you bite the bullet and ask her. In your relationship, communication had become incredibly important, especially when you would be away from each other for long portions of time, having to rely on Facetime and text messages. So it was always easy talking to Leah.
“I mean I would love to have you there baby, but what about the fans?” She moved from her spot on the kitchen island to standing behind you as you washed the dishes. Placing soft kisses on your neck as her hands found your hips.
It was a good point that you knew she was going to bring up. You had been so adamant on seeing Leah play that you almost kind of forgot about everything else. There would certainly be rumors thrown around like crazy, but rumors were really just rumors. There were new rumors about you or Leah almost every day, what was one more?
“I know, I know.” Thinking through everything she was saying. A small section of your mind thinking let the fans speculate, you want to support Leah, that was what is most important. “I want to be there.” Turning to face her with the most serious look you could muster up so she could tell you it was really important to you.
“Okay, you can sit with my family in the box. I can call my mom and let her know you will be there.” Leah knew the risk of you going, but inside she was beaming. You would be there to support her at a sold-out Emirates. You would be there, in person.
“Perfect. I need to find my McCabe kit to wear too!” you joke out knowing how to rile her up. Leah casually smacks your ass as you return to washing the dishes.
“Don’t even joke like that.” Her stern face not lasting long as she breaks into a smile and a laugh.
—————
In your perfectly disguised outfit, you make your way with Amanda toward your assigned seating area. The Emirates was loud and energetic, it was supposed to be a solid match. Two pretty matched teams with incredibly loyal fanbases.
“I’m so glad you could make it!” Amanda says to you as you walk. You had met Amanda pretty early in your and Leah’s relationship and she was just as lovely as Leah. Amanda had quickly become a mother figure for you.
“Me too. I’m excited to watch Leah play live instead of on a tiny phone.” Your heart was pounding, eager to watch Leah play, even more eager to watch Leah win.
Only a few fans had noticed you were in attendance as they looked into the box, but with your large black puffer, hat, and Arsenal scarf on, they weren’t able to see the ‘Williamson 6’ kit you were wearing with pride.
The Arsenal started strong on offense, a quick goal by Viv put them up 1-0 and halftime ended with Beth finding the back of the net for a second. Leah had her stern demeanor on when she played, but when she looked into the box and saw you standing with her mother as you watched, she sent you a small wave and a soft smile.
At the halftime whistle, you were desperately hungry. Stepping out of the box as you searched for something to eat. You were met with a few more fans whom you sent smiles and took photos with. Whenever someone had asked why you were in attendance, you just told them you had grown up a major Arsenal fan. It wasn’t a complete lie but it was the easiest to tell. One fan had asked your favorite player and you jokingly told them that it is Alessia Russo. I mean who doesn’t love England’s star girl.
In the second half, Manchester United’s Geyse dribbled down the midfield and shot on goal and the ball quickly went passed Manu. Nearing the 80th minute, Ella Toone managed to find the left corner of the goal and it was now tied 2-2. The energy in the Emirates picked up dramatically.
To say you were amped up would be an understatement, jumping up and down for every forward ball sent down the pitch, hoping for the 3 points with another goal. You were cheering loud and proud for Arsenal, mostly for your defender girlfriend though.
You didn’t spend much time on social media, it was best for your mental health to steer clear of it most of the time. So when pictures of you at the Arsenal game started to go viral, you had no idea. Many people speculating why you were there and any other nonsense shipping of you and the players. Thankfully because of London’s bipolar temperatures, you still had your coat on, hiding the real reason you were here.
In extra time, Caitlin sent a dangerous ball to Viv and she scored. The Arsenal win 3-2. The crowd went wild with enthusiasm, as did you. You hugged Amanda and the rest of her family in the box as you bid them farewell’s and left.
Leah and you had already planned a small date after the match at a fancy restaurant just outside the city to escape prying eyes. So instead of greeting her at the end of the match like all the other girlfriends and family did, you quickly retreated to Leah’s car. Waiting for her to finish up her walk around the stadium, get changed, and then meet you in her car. You had just simply changed into a long black dress in the car. Leah had tinted windows anyway so it didn’t really matter.
What you didn’t expect was for Leah to get into the car with a suit on. Your mouth was open and dry, so incredibly dry. She looked breathtaking. The black of her suit made her blonde hair stick out and the black tie was doing wonders in your head.
“Lee you look amazing. Definitely don’t look like you just got done playing 90 minutes of football.” You joked with her.
“It’s one of my many, many talents.” she sarcastically said as she shrugged and sent you a wink. “You look good too baby. Stunning as always.” giving you a quick peck.
Leah in her suit and her right hand dangerously high on your thigh wanted to make you scream out to cancel the date and take you straight home. Use that tie to tie you to the bed. But patience was key, good girls were patient, and good girls got rewarded.
The drive wasn’t long and eventually, you were pulling into the parking lot. It was a nice modern place, big glass windows surrounded the building and inside it was even more lovely. Leah had reserved you a table in the back to try to avoid extra attention to the both of you.
The food was mouthwatering and you were so captivated by Leah in her suit. Your eyes were dead-set on her as she spoke so neither you nor Leah noticed when a couple fans outside the restaurant had taken a few quick shots of the two of you holding hands at the small table through the glass windows.
The dinner could not have lasted longer, Leah was certainly taking her time finishing her meal. Leah was guiding her long legs up yours and her hand placements were anything but subtle. You couldn’t take it any longer.
“Lee please take me home and fuck me” was all you needed to say as Leah grabbed your hand and led you to her car.
—————
You had woken up in the morning before Leah. You traced your fingertips over the red lines all over her back from last night’s actions, carefully moving her blonde locks out of the way. It was peaceful, the sun was just rising outside of your open blinds and Leah was sound asleep.
A loud phone call noise ruined the silence. First, it was your phone ringing, and then it was Leah’s. You untangle from Leah slightly and grab your phone from the bedside table to stop the annoying noise.
Quietly saying “Hello?” as you didn’t want to wake Leah just yet.
It was your agent.
“Have you been on social media today?” she almost screams at you, anger definitely in her voice.
“What no? Why?” inching yourself more upright in the bed and leaning over to grab Leah’s phone as it has continued to ring.
“Did you and Leah go on a date last night?” she continues to swarm you with questions and not explaining why she was calling. She obviously knew you and Leah were dating, but why did it matter if you went on a secret date?
“Yes? Why?” utterly confused.
“A fan posted a photo of you and Leah last night and it’s gone viral.”
The first thought through your mind was fuck. The second was that you immediately needed to wake Leah. You look on Twitter and there are several photos of you and Leah last night. One of you two holding hands at the table. One of the two of you getting into Leah’s car afterwards. There were several pictures almost documenting the whole date.
Everyone making the quick connection of the real reason you were at the Arsenal game yesterday as social media ran wild with dating rumors. I mean by the evidence, they weren’t really rumors at this point, they were facts.
Gently pushing her shoulder as you said, “Lee you need to wake up.”
Of course, she turns right over without even opening her eyes, shifting away from your hand.
“Leah Williamson wake up!” you shout at her.
You weren’t angry at Leah, but the panic that you felt in your chest at the thought of your little secret getting out startled you. Were you really ready to let the public know?
Leah could hear the stress in your voice as she was now awake, rubbing her eyes and looking at you.
“What’s wrong?” She asked, sleep definitely still in her voice.
“Someone posted photos from our date last night.” you tell her as you hand her your phone with the pictures on it.
You had completely forgotten about your agent on the phone, as she rambled off ideas on PR tactics that could hopefully lessen the damage. Leah scrolls through the photos and the countless responses.
“What do we do?” you ask Leah as your finger pinch your nose.
“What do you want to do?”
You fully expected her to begin siding with your agent, a quick way to end this little mess. But as she looked at you, she wanted to do what you wanted. And what you wanted was to love Leah in public, tired of loving her in private. You wanted to post funny pictures of Leah, she always made you laugh. You wanted to hold her hand in public, letting everyone know she is yours. You wanted to take her on extravagant dates and show her how much you loved her every single day, in public and in private.
Sure the media was ruthless, but you and Leah would battle the storm together.
“I guess the secret’s out.” you chuckled out. The stress in the situation lessened, you would weather the media together. You told your agent that you were going to let the public know and hung up.
Leah, on her phone now, messaging back to a couple people who had reached out about the photos and asked what she was going to do.
“Are you okay with this?” you asked her to make sure she was feeling the same way you were.
“Yeah I think so. I don’t want us to be a secret anymore. I want the whole world to know your mine” she said as she intertwines your fingers with hers and pulls the comforter up as you both choose your favorite photos to let the world know.
“I guess the secret’s out.” you joked as you pressed publish.
#woso x reader#woso community#woso fanfics#woso imagine#woso#woso one shot#woso soccer#woso blurbs#womens soccer#woso couples#leah williamson x you#leah williamson x reader#leah williamson imagine#leah williamson#arsenal wfc#awfc#arsenal women
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141 + extra when they get home from war
Y’all be too much lol. This is my third head cannon and the Mother’s Day one is still on the top of the likes list and I don’t know why like that one was my trash one and everything else I like put time and effort into. It’s like offering people a gourmet meal or Ramen noodles with chicken nuggets, lol I’m glad everybody does enjoy my Content though, and I hope that you all enjoy this one as well!
COD x Female Character
Warnings: PG-13, mentioning of sex, fluff, suggestion of angst
Captain John Prince
• when he gets home, he’s usually pretty tired.
• Don’t be alarmed if he just wants to sleep when he gets home.
• Usually you pick him up from the airport and he will load in his bags with a grunt and say that he could really use some good sleep.
• He smells like gun powder and dirt, even though he just took a shower.
• When he gets home, he will give you a kiss, then head off to bed no matter what time of day it is.
• He’s just that tired.
• When he wakes up the first thing he does is go back over to you and give you a proper kiss and a proper greeting.
• Make sure that you have some food for him. He’s going to be hungry, and he really needs some thing that’s more sustainable than MREs.
• He wants to hear about your life and what you’ve been up to while he’s been at work.
• Listening to you talk is one of his favorite past times and it helps him relax. Sitting in front of the couch while watching some TV show while you’re rambling on about the past months and about what you’ve been up to really brings a smile to his face.
• He likes to catch up on his reading.
• This man enjoys reading with a cigar in his mouth and a glass of bourbon.
• If you’ve picked out a new book for him to read, he will be gladly appreciate of of it.
• But most importantly, he would want you to be in his lap while he’s reading, but if you don’t like the smell of cigar smoke near your face, he will make sure not to smoke near you.
Lieutenant Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley
• Simon comes home as Ghost.
• The persona of a vengeful wraith and the shell of a once human is what your are graced with.
• He is very quiet, very solemn, and very cold.
• This is because he’s just dealing with his PTSD.
• He needs time to heal from recent encounters. This can take as little as one week to as long as three months.
• After badgering him enough times, to go see a therapist, he obliges.
• Though he’s pretty cranky about it.
• Give him space. He doesn’t want to hurt you, but right now, he doesn’t trust himself, especially with the nightmares raging through his mind.
• His nightmares are so vivid that it can be hard to distinguish Friend or foe.
• This is due to the fact that he needs to be working or else those vile thoughts come hunting him.
• He will never tell you about what goes on while he’s away.
• Once Ghost disappears, Simon takes his place.
• The poor broken man is just tired, and he just wants to lay next to you and hear about your day or months.
• Once you become stable enough, he begins to be more active around the house instead of just brooding in the bedroom.
• He hast to keep himself busy at all times.
• No rest for the wicked.
• Hast to sleep with a lamp on.
• Even though he seems harsh around the outside, he loves you deeply, and that’s why he separates himself from you for a certain time.
Sergeant Johnny ‘Soap’ MacTavish
• Opposite of Ghost, Johnny is so excited to see you!
• As soon as he gets off the airplane, he runs over to you!
• This man is all over you before you even see him!
• He starts asking you 1 million questions about how your months have been and what’s been going on with his family and any news on the recent football (soccer) matches.
• You actually have to calm him down because he’s all over the place.
• When you get into the car, he is kissing you all over your face.
• This man has enough energy to run to the moon and back, and it shows.
• He’ll try to take you right there if only he wasn’t in a car confined by a seatbelt
• Johnny is quick to help around the house and do whatever task you need to do.
• He says he’s making up for lost time.
• If you’ve decorated the house in a new way, he will always compliment what you’ve done to it.
• Johnny wakes up early in the morning and practically begged you to join him on a hike.
• It could be down pouring for all he cares about but he really wants to be with you while he’s working out.
• He will bring you back a souvenir probably something stupid like a rock or a jar of sand.
• If he gets any scars, he shows you and starts pointing them out and tells you the story about each and everyone of them.
• He won’t go into great detail about how gruesome the battling was.
• He wants you to be in his life every step of the way, even if you’re at home.
Sargent Kyle "Gaz" Garrick
• Kyle is grinning from ear to ear when he sees you!
• He’s not as hyper as Johnny, nor is he a stoic as his captain.
• He has the perfect mix between excited and tired
• When you to get home, he says that you two should just order pizza and he’s dying to play a video game with you even if he’s a little tired.
• Kyle doesn’t go into a lot of detail about his work. He’ll just make an occasional gesture about what he saw what he did.
• Like soap, he’ll bring you back a souvenir.
• He actually takes time with his souvenir shopping though, and we’ll go to local markets installs to actually pick you out some thing that you might like.
• Happy to be with you and glad to be away from the fighting.
Commander Alejandro Vargas
• When he comes home, his first instinct is to drop his bags by the door, and bring you into a warm and passionate kiss and hug.
• As much as he loves his job and all of his soldiers and team, some thing about being at home with you makes him feel truly loved.
• He may be tired, but he still going to serenade you like it’s his last day on earth.
• If you haven’t started making dinner yet, he will help and participate with whatever you’re doing. He may be tired, but he’s never tired for you.
• He loves watching you move around the house.
• He’s not going to deny it, but you wearing his clothes and cooking dinner with him really turns him on.
• After dinner, he may propose a night in bed to you.
• This man serenades you in sex especially after he’s been away for a long time
• Physical touch is his love language, and he loves being with you.
Sergeant Major Rodolfo "Rudy" Parra
• Like his commander, when he comes home, all he wants to do is drop his bags and immediately embrace you and a warm hug while rubbing your head and whispering how much he’s missed you.
• He also wants to help you cook dinner, or do some thing, but if you go, tell him to take a shower and to relax, he won’t deny that he needs it.
• Rudy loves reading a book with you so after dinner he will want to skip the washing dishes and ask if you would like to read with him before going to bed. No matter what time it is in the day. If he’s tired enough, he will once to at least read a little bit before falling asleep.
• Once he’s asleep, the bags underneath his eyes seem to disappear. He knows you’re close and he knows that you’re safe and that’s all that he could ever ask for to make him happy.
König
• As soon as he gets off the airplane and sees you amongst the crowd of people, his anxiety stops, and he immediately makes his way to you.
• He can’t sleep on an airplane, but as soon as he’s in the car, he’s about ready to doze off. You have to remind him not to though, because waking him up or trying to drag him out of the car is near impossible.
• He is really trying hard not to pass out in the car.
• Once he gets home, he stumbles into the kitchen looking for a nice tall glass of water to drink, and a sandwich or two to eat.
• Make sure that you keep the sandwiches stocked.
• This man will then make his way to the bedroom, take a cold shower, get into some warm PJs, and then slip into bed.
• Once he’s asleep, he will stay in his hybernation for roughly 3 days.
• He will only wake up to use the restroom, get a drink of water, or to eat some thing.
• When his mind is on the battlefield, he rarely puts himself into a sleep state, but when he’s at home, it’s like all of the hours that he missed, sleeping or suddenly compiled in a single week.
• Just let him rest, and sooner or later, he’ll wake up from his hibernation, and will seek you out so that he can give you kisses and hugs and ask how your time has been away from him.
Alex Keller
• When Alex gets back, like everybody on this list, he is tired.
• His leg is very sore from the prosthetic. Prosthetics are not comfortable and cause I’m serious leg and back pain.
• He will ask very nicely if you could massage his leg for him when he gets home.
• Once he’s in the car, Alex is taking off that damn prosthetic leg and rubbing his stump.
• You can tell he’s in a lot of pain just by the way, his eyes crease, and a frown forms.
• In order to get him off of the pain, you talk to him about his time.
• This usually makes him perk up since he enjoys talking to you about his adventures.
• His personality is like a mix between Johnny and Kyle, but leans more towards Kyle.
• When you get home you’ll have to help him walk because he really does not want to put on his prosthetic.
• You just leave the bag in the car to get later.
• When Alex gets into bed, it’s like a huge sigh of relief washes over him.
• You can see how red and agitated his amputated limb is.
• You do what you can to make him feel better by applying some numbing cream and giving him some pain relieving medicine.
• He always feels better once you start massaging his leg and even more so if you give them a back rub.
• This man is a simple man and enjoys a simple massage after months of no rest.
Philip Graves
• Like a soldier from World War II coming home to meet his best girl.
• He always surprises you when he comes home and has one of his shadow men drive him to the house.
• He always buys you a huge bouquet of flowers and some pretty jewelry as well.
• When he walks through the door, he asks where his baby girl is.
• And of course you come running and giving him a huge hug and crying, which he immediately envelops you into a hug.
• He’s whispering in your ear with that southern drawl about how much she misses you.
• He gets a little into himself when he’s talking about how his mission is or how he was able to handle such a dangerous and daunting task.
• As egotistical, as this may seem, it is his way of expressing his love for you in a slightly weird way.
• In the evening, he’ll probably swoop you up into a dance, with both of you, smiling and laughing.
• He tells you how much he misses you and how much he loves you.
• In bed, he shows you how much he means both of those things.
#cod x reader#cod x you#x reader#fluff#cod#cod john price#john price#price x reader#price x you#simon riley#simon ghost riley#simon ghost riley x reader#johnny soap mactavish#soap x reader#kyle gaz garrick#gaz x reader#alejandro vargas#alejandro x you#alejandro x reader#rudy x reader#rudy x you#könig x you#könig x reader#cod könig#alex keller#alex x reader#cod philip graves#phillip graves#graves x reader#headcanon
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Star of the show. (CL)
summary: when charles leclerc hard launches his actress girlfriend, star of teen wolf as scott mccalls sister, fans go crazy.
note: obviously in the show, scott doesn’t have a sister, but pretend for me, kk? lol
fc: christina nadin (love her)
warnings: language, and sexual comments
masterlist here -> masterlist link
^ check my list for all posts! ^
liked by: y/n.user, carlossainz55, and 1,923,035 others
charles_leclerc: the star of the show, and my heart (and the ferrari paddock)
view comments…
ferrarifwiends: did charles just hard launch his gf and expect us not to freak tf out????
y/n.user: awww you used cute pictures of me😮💨🫶
↳ charles_leclerc: every picture of you is cute, chérie
↳ user7: oh shit. he’s def getting head for that one
↳ user3: UNCALLED FOR (agreed)
leclerc.edittpg: HOLY SHIT
teenwolffansss: mother is dating a vroom man?
landonorris: she helped me meet dylan obrien guys!!
↳ oscarpiastri: yeah and you never shut up about it
↳ landonorris: you’re just jealous
user5: and she’s close with the paddock?
↳ charycarlos: we have been fooled by the monégasque again
y/nfanedits8: she’s taken? i now have no chance 💔
user1: the fries and the espresso martini look so good
↳ 1655charlossss: i’m sayingggg
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
liked by: charles_leclerc, francisca.cgomes, and 1,240,925 others
y/n.user: my shining star
view comments…
tylerposey58: not to be a protective set big brother..
↳ y/n.user: ur the best sibling i could have ever asked for :’)
↳ tylerposey58: love you and miss you. pls visit me and phem
↳ y/n.user: i’ll bring char
↳ charles_leclerc: :)
stilesstilinski4life: kinda wanted her and dylan to date..
↳ y/n.fppp: just be happy for her? her and dylan are bsfs, she’s dating charles ffs
user3: the way her and tyler are literally the best sibling duo (sibling soulmates. meant to be actual sibling i swear)
charles_leclerc: je t’aime
↳ y/n.user: je t’aime aussi
f1wags: such a beautiful couple, holy shit
charismybae16: omg we are gonna get bf charles pics AHHHHH
↳ wifey.y/n: nah, forget him, we get gf y/n pics OMG
user3: you guys are too cuteeeee
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
liked by: charles_leclerc, pierregasly, and 1,420,004 others
y/n.user: fútbol and food (the best f’s)
view comments…
charles_leclerc: next to fucking
↳ y/n.user: charles OMG
↳ charles_leclerc: im not wrong, cherié
f1wags: y/n is turning charles into a bold commenter😭
dylanobrien: baseball is better
↳ y/n.user: mets games🧡💙
↳ dylanobrien: you need to come back so we can go?? bring charles so you can culture him
↳ charles_leclerc: texting the gc now, this sounds so fun
user4: UGH THEY HAVE A GC?!?!?!
hollandroden: you are so beautiful!? miss out girls nights :(
↳ crystalmreed: let’s hangout soon!
↳ y/n.user: holland <3 and yes we should!!
betateenwolfedits: these pictures are pure gold
user4: where’s kika?
↳ francisca.cgomes: i’m at a fashion show, lol. had to leave y/n alone with the guys :(
↳ y/n.user: SAVE ME KIKA
↳ francisca.cgomes: OMW!!
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
liked by: y/n.user, pierregasly, and 1,872,024 others
charles_leclerc: we eat good🍷🍝
view comments…
y/n.user: CHICKEN🍗
↳ charles_leclerc: 😋😋😋
teenwolf: getting flashbacks from when y/n would order chicken nuggets 24/7 during filming
↳ y/n.user: miss u guys🤭
↳ teenwolf: we miss you more!🩵
y/nycharfp: they still look hot while shoving their faces, unfair
user7: favorite couple on the grid
dylansprayberry: nice to see you found someone who enjoys cooking as much as you do, y/n
↳ y/n.user: charles can NOT cook
f1wags: same pose, different food and person
bilesbilinski28: slayyyyy
danielricciardo: i want chicken
↳ y/n.user: let’s go get canes rn
↳ danielricciardo; omw rn actually
user2: i bet they actually do go and get canes….
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
daniels instagram story
seen by: y/n.user, charles_leclerc, and 2,024,294 others
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
your instagram story
seen by: charles_leclerc, landonorris, and 1,386,299 others
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
liked by: lilymhe, charles_leclerc, and 1,428,993 others
y/n.user: how these triple headers got us
view comments…
charles_leclerc: you look like an angel when you’re sleeping/waking up and i look like a gremlin :/
↳ y/n.user: char, no you do not
f1wags: shes barbie and he’s j ken fr
y/nsfp1: she looks sooo prettyyyy
francisca.cgomes: pretty girl
↳ y/n.user: ily kika
user4: prince of monaco sleeping?! make sure he stays safe!
crystalmreed: that’s my sleeping mask!
↳ y/n.user: whaaaaaa
teenwolfeditsss: they both are still hot while sleeping and after waking up?? i’m done for
kellypiquet: those selfies are so cute!!
↳ y/n.user: ty kelly!! 🫶
user9: i need a teen wolf reunion :(
↳ char.y/n.fp: i j need charles to meet them fr
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
liked by: charles_leclerc, tylerposey58, and 2,187,024 others
y/n:user: i always see people doing these aesthetic slide number things, so here’s mine 😋
1) charles tries a pepper that tyler posey got him
2) tyler holds the pepper while charles freaks out over the hotness
3) charles guzzles water while saying “too hot!! too hot!!”
4) charles and i found dylans look-alike!!
5) i think pierre and charles took this while me, kika, and tyler were walking around the mall infront of them. dylan was with them? i’m not sure tbh
6) took this picture a few days ago when we took charles, pierre, and kika to universal
view comments…
charles_leclerc: that pepper was too hot
↳ dylanobrien: one might say “too hot!! too hot!!”
↳ tylerposey58: “tyler why is it so spicy?!”
↳ charles_leclerc: cherié you’re friends are bullying me.
↳ y/n.user: it’s okay, char. ilysm you’re so brave for trying that pepper!❤️
↳ charles_leclerc: 🙂❤️
↳ tylerposey58: 🙄🙄
user2: MY TWO WORLDS COLLIDE
f1wags: she’s not even in these?? CRIMINAL!
landonorris: and she didn’t even invite me? :(
↳ y/n.user: you said you didn’t wanna go??
↳ landonorris: I LIED
f1page34: lmaooo, the pic of char and pierre
user7: MARIO AND LUIGIIII
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
liked by: y/n.user, pierregasly, and 2,197,024 others
charles_leclerc: my own “aesthetic slide number things” but it’s all my gf (mostly)
1) woke y/n up at 7am to get breakfast and all she ordered was orange juice and chips & guac
2) y/n trying to fix dylan’s jeep (that didn’t happen)
3) espresso martini night!!!
4) no explanation needed
5) y/n crying because the mets lost
6) me in my new raincoat! :)
view comments…
user3: y/n is SUCH a mood😭
y/n.user: CHAR😦
↳ charles_leclerc: 😘
y/nsfansss7: MOTHER IS SLAYING WITH THOSE MARTINIS
f1wags: how many letters in y/n’s name?
↳ user3: ATEEEE
↳ author (me lolz): j pretend ur name is 8 letters for the smau😛
carlossainz55: it really is y/n’s world and we are all just living in it
↳ maxverstappen1: this is true
f1fanpage4: crying over the mets losing is such a y/n thing to do
dylanobrien: the mets losing is such a sad thing, i don’t blame her
vroompage16: the juice and chips is so me
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
your instagram story:
seen by: charles_leclerc, oscarpiastri, and 1,328,991 others
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
(reposts, comments, and likes are appreciated!^-^)
#formula 1#f1#formula one#charles leclerc#charles leclerc instagram au#charles leclerc smau#charles leclerc x female reader#charles leclerc x y/n#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc fluff#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc fic#cl16#cl16 x reader#cl16 imagine#cl16 x you#cl16 one shot#cl16 x y/n#cl16 fluff
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Jason slow dancing with you in the kitchen, something fluffy like that please!
Fighting sleep rn so this is perfect. You’re also getting teasing Jason for free. And a ton of other unnecessary details cause I got way too into it.
—
Time written - 11:42 p.m
—
“Why’re you out of bed, babe?” A bedraggled Jason greeted your weary, squinting eyes as they got used to the kitchen lighting.
“Couldn’t sleep,” you whisper, exhaustion heavy on your tone despite your body’s refusal to succumb to it. Jason settled himself back against the counter beside the stove, continuously watching over a small pot while scrolling over mindless articles over his phone.
“C’mere.” Jason offers an arm towards you, watching your oversized shirt clad body trudge across cold tile floor to get to him. He hugs you close, your cheek hearing the drum of his steady heart as you relax against his chest, your body easing in his embrace.
“What’re you making?”
“Warming you up some milk,” Jason murmurs into your hair, rubbing soothing motions along the small of your back. The lack of sleep wasn’t new, mostly due to your persistence on waiting on him after his patrol nights ended. He felt guilty, choosing to stay extra hours to make sure you kept yourself asleep.
He didn’t mind it. He preferred you over the cold streets on a November midnight.
“Gotta treat my baby like a baby and make her a bottle.”
“Shut up,” you scoff with a smile, knowing he’d take it as an amusing compliment. He enjoyed making you laugh as much as he did taking care of you.
Your preferred milk with a dash of cinnamon and chamomile honey slowly came to a simmer on the stove, awaiting a spoonful of cocoa powder. You’ll ask if it was Alfred’s idea to having hot chocolate instead of warm milk for sleep, he’ll shrug and tell you he saw it once on a cheesy Hallmark channel.
Jason closes his eyes, a slight smile growing on his face.
“Tell me something,” he whispers, his voice still quiet, rough, and tired, the late hour shown in bright green digital numbers on the stove clock.
“Hm?”
“Just… say anything. You don’t have to put any thought behind it. I just wanna hear your voice… okay?”
You had no understanding to the reason, only coming up with him wanting to tire you out just by talking lots of nonsense. You could do that, sometimes that’s your specialty.
“Okay,” you reply, saying the first words that came to mind after taking a sigh.
“When was the last time we had Dino chicken nuggets? We’re grown adults, what’s really stopping us from eating them?”
Jason starts to chuckle a little, then his laughter grows just a little louder. He cradled you closer to body, his arms still snug around your waist. What a silly thing to say, even when that’s exactly what he had asked for.
“No, no, it’s true. Why do kids get to claim all the tasty snack food?” He chuckles, gently swaying you from side to side, not even making much of an attempt to move his feet.
“One of these days… let’s just eat like little kids for a day.” You suggest, your voice growing a bit thick with exhaustion. “Hot chocolate and dino nuggets, and we can just stay in bed. It’ll be a nice break, don’t you think? So you don’t have to be Red Hood all the time.”
He lowers his head a little, stray tufts of hair tickling your face while his lips plant gentle kisses along your neck. His heart hurts a little bit from that little desire deep in your chest to have him home more, to be a proper boyfriend and cradle you in your dreams, just as he did now.
“Yeah? I don’t mind that,” Jason says, keeping you blanketed in the safety of his embrace, slowly shifting weight along his feet to sway you with him a little more.
“You ever danced before, sweetheart?”
“Hm?” Your head tilts a bit. “No, not like this.”
“Is it making you sleepy?” He asks, catching the quirk in the corner of your lip.
“You rocking me like a baby?”
“Can see its working,” He snickers, kissing the top of your forehead. His little sleeping beauty, nestled in the arms of a crimson beast.
“Tell me more,” he whispers, raspy voice growing both soothing and quiet. “Keep talking. I wanna listen to you.”
Your head shifts, your lips muffled against his chest, amusing him with a complete lack of understanding.
“What’s that, baby?”
“You’re not home as much a lot of nights.”
Jason exhales, feeling his lungs deflating while he spares a hand to cradle the back of your neck and runs through your hair.
“I know Princess,” he responds, voice growing softer.
Then, he goes silent for a moment—as if he’s thinking of what to say next.
“D’you miss me when I’m not home?” he whispers, his voice soft and curious.
“I always do,” you admit, trailing your fingers all along his silvery scarred chest.
A light smile pulls at the side of his lips, feeling his pessimistic thoughts satiated for the time being.
He brings his hand up to your chin, caressing it softly with his thumb before tilting it upwards to get a good look at you.
“You know,” Jason responds, “I think I miss you the most when I’m not home.”
His voice is soft, as if he doesn’t want to be so vulnerable about this. This routine is something he can’t control sometimes, no matter how much he wanted to. Little nights like these where he could vanish from sight just to spend a couple extra hours with you was the greatest luxury he could ever want from the universe.
Time was the most precious possession that always slipped out of reach, he treasured every second of it with you.
“You’re always on my mind, babygirl. Try not to forget that.” As he’s saying this, he can’t help but tilt his head and kiss your forehead.
“M’tired,” you whine before opening your eyes, unaware when you had even closed them. He glances back to the stove before shutting off the burner, acknowledging he could at least save the mouthwatering concoction for breakfast in the morning.
“Too tired to wait for your bottle, huh?”
“Stooop.” You groan against the crook between his neck and shoulder, feeling the rumble of his amusement along his chest. “God, I hate you.”
“Hate me in the morning, babygirl,” he muses before slipping his arm under your knees, hoisting you up in his embrace to carry you back to bed.
#jason todd#jason todd x reader#jason todd x you#jason todd x fem!reader#dc jason todd#jason todd x y/n#Jason Todd dc#warm milk#it’s good stuff#jason todd x female!reader#dc comics#gotham knights jason todd#jason todd x
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requesting for one 1k celebration (ik it's late and it's totally okay if you decide not to write it, congratulations on it anyway!!) but rockstar!reader with either fan or bodyguard!james??? idk, take this any way you want, i'm giving you the wheel
i loved this request so much and i tried my best so hopefully you'll enjoy!! thank you for requesting, love u♡ you can send james potter requests if you have one!
bodyguard!james potter x rockstar!reader, you and james can't keep your feelings secret anymore
brave enough
you like the hotel room but it's boring to spend all night in.
the concert was quite satisfying and it went smoothly. you know you're getting more and more popular each day; followed by paparazzi almost everywhere, interviewed by important channels that people talk about on twitter, having fan accounts on instagram. you feel a sense of joy and fear at the same time. it's scary to be famous but you enjoy sharing your songs with people, you like the way their eyes shine when you start singing. most of the time you think it's worth being a bit scared.
this is where your security team joins the picture. you are being protected by a team of bodyguards, they are silent but effective. sometimes you feel too important when you walk into a crowded space with the team covering everywhere but most of the time it doesn't feel normal. it feels so silly to be needing protection unlike a normal person. you should be past that. you should realize your position in this world as a famous rockstar and probably should be grateful to these people who never let anything bad happen to you.
shaking redundant thoughts away, you put on some comfy clothes, a pair of shorts and an oversized shirt. you only take your wallet and your phone before leaving the room, airpods tucked nicely in your pocket just in case. you check how you look on the mirror at the bathroom and the sight is just like you imagined, exhaustedly happy with a crooked smile and tired eyes.
you knock on the door across yours. you are sure james will open it in two seconds. he does that exactly but the sight in front of you makes you look at your shoes shyly without thinking- he's shirtless.
"hey." james says, casually. "something wrong?"
he's always asking that firstly, the head of your security team. he's huge, all muscles and tall, you have seen too many comments on instagram saying how hot he looks. well, he does. he really is good looking, you'd have to be blind to not realize it. he has lovely eyes and a big smile when he tries to be comforting, huge hands and a perfect chest. james potter is someone's dream guy, you are sure of it.
"no." you say, eyes still looking anywhere but him. "nothing, i just- i got bored, thought maybe we could go out. you can put on your shirt- if you want, i can wait."
james takes a step back to let you in. you follow his lead, the room smells like his cologne and hints of aftershave. it's making your legs shaky, you sit on the couch as he takes his shirt from the bed and puts it on.
"you wanna go out?" he asks with a gentle voice. things with him has always been this sweet, not like a regular boss-employee relationship. you know he cares about you, he's like a friend who's always been around, who you can always fall in love with if you ever take that dangerous step.
you nod at his question. he puts on his glasses and looks like himself again. "i wanted some fresh air, and i'm a bit hungry. maybe we can get chicken nuggets from the place in the corner?"
james thinks about it for a moment. it feels weird, like you're asking for his permission to go out but it's far from the truth. you need james's opinion before leaving a secure place because he knows the best. he knows the danger, the press, the paparazzi. if he says you should stay in, you probably should listen. still, you're hoping he'll say yes to going out with you.
"i'm sorry, sweetheart." he says. "i think we should stay at the hotel tonight."
"yeah?" you ask. you can't help but feel a bit upset, you are tired because of your busy schedule but you want to hang out sometimes. you want to be anywhere you want any time without worrying. it would be so nice, to be out with james, just eating and drinking. you could tell him all about your new album. you could tell stupid jokes to him, you could make him smile. now that your voice sounds sad, james flinches just a little bit. he comes to your side with a few short steps.
"i'm really sorry." he says. he kneels in front of you to make an eye contact. "you just had a show and i think it's better if we stay out of sight for now."
you nod, give him a smile to let him know it's okay. "i'll go back to my room then. you should get some rest, you've been working all night long."
you stand up to go but james is quicker. he holds your hand, your fingers go lax in his palm. he is on his feet again, looking at you with a promising pair of eyes.
"do you want to stay here? we can order chicken nuggets and sit in the balcony."
the idea is tempting but you really don't want to waste james's resting time. "it's okay, james. you probably should get some sleep before we leave tomorrow morning."
"sweetheart." he says, his voice is so soft you could crumble under it. "please. would you like to spend some time with me?"
you nod this time, how could you resist his sweet voice? james orders take out as you go sit in the balcony, the night air is chill and you can see a few stars. it's quiet and nice, you close your eyes to the breeze you feel on your skin.
james comes in, wearing a hoodie. he has one in his hand too, he gives you the hoodie, hoping you'll accept. you take it, thanking him silently before wearing it. he sits next to you, comfortable silence fills the air as you wait for food. you look so pretty in the hoodie, james almost doesn't hear the knock on the door. he is quick to leave the balcony, shaking his head as if he's trying to stop thinking something he shouldn't.
he comes back with the food and two huge paper cups of iced tea. you help him settle the paper bags down on the little table, he ordered nuggets and different kinds of sauces he's sure you like. you take a sip from your drink, coldness of it gives a relief to your throat. james does the same, you both start eating silently.
maybe it'd be uncomfortable if it were someone else, just sitting and eating without saying much but this is james you are here with. no matter what the situation is his presence is always comforting and warm. you adore how cool he is, how kind.
"so," you start, breaking the silence. "did you enjoy the show tonight?"
james smiles. "of course i did. you know your way around that stage, you know? i always enjoy seeing you sing."
"thank you, james." you say with a soft voice.
"you are-" he starts, "you really are something else."
you stop drinking for a second to see his eyes. he sounds like he's confessing a big secret but it's not the first time james has complimented you, so you are not sure why his voice comes out like that.
"jamie?"
"everything stops when you sing, when you dance on the stage like you always do. i see people's faces, how they admire you, how they follow your every step. my face must look like theirs i believe, just- like your biggest fan."
you give him the loveliest smile you can manage, how dare he says such a beautiful thing? he smiles back, it's full of admiration and pride. he's proud of you, you realize. he's always been around, always been there for you. he's been fierce and brave, faced every little thing that bothered you like the strong man he is. your chest fills with something you can't identify.
"well," you wander around the words. "you're my favorite fan and that puts you in the most special place."
james chuckles, you are losing your mind. you forget everything for a second, who you are and who he is.
"james, i-"
"angel." he says. "it's okay."
he has no right to do that. he has no right to make your heart beat faster and say that it's okay. you feel like you should do something, say something to end this misery. you both stop eating, the wind passes through your hair. james still looks at you with an undeniable affection.
"i'm not trying to mess with your mind, i promise." he says quietly. "but i'm not strong enough to keep everything in me, i just- i'm sorry if i'm making you uncomfortable."
"no, no, of course you're not." you say quickly. "it's just- i don't want to be delusional, james. i don't want to imagine things."
james reaches for your hand. the short distance between you disappears as he leans for your cheek. he gives you the softest kiss, you can't breathe when he does that. he leans back into his chair, your hand still in his hand.
"you're not imagining things." he says. "i don't know if i should be brave enough to tell you something i can't take back."
your fingers move a bit, but james doesn't let go. "you should." you say, firmer than ever. "you should be brave. i believe it's in the job description."
he pulls your hand to himself, makes you stand up and fall back to his lap. your heartbeat goes faster, he holds you gently.
"i'm mad for you." he says, looking deep into your eyes. "i'm willing to take any risk if you want me to. i'd do anything to protect you, and it's not only because i'm your bodyguard."
you settle down on his lap, holding one of his hands and stroking his knuckles. "can i kiss you?" you ask, not too shy but a bit hesitant.
james nods, and he cups your cheek. his thumb rubs your jawline, you cover his lips with yours. the kiss is better than you imagine, he is the only thing in your mind. suddenly, you feel how dangerous he is; you can write hundreds of songs about this kiss, about james. he has the power to invade your mind and he isn't shy about it. he is a fierce kisser, uses his hands and lips in a way that makes you melt.
his tongue meets yours and it's the best thing at that moment. james sucks your bottom lip, he doesn't break the kiss until you pull yourself back. you press small kisses on his cheeks, his sharp jaw is prominent under your mouth. he breathes faster, the tip of his nose rubbing on your cheek.
"what if someone sees us here?" you ask, playfully. his hand around your thigh tightens.
he pushes your hair back. "it's too dark here for anyone to recognize us. do you think i'd put you in that kind of situation?"
his tone matches yours. "i think you'll have to put me in that kind of situation eventually." you say, kissing his lips again. "i'm not worried, james. i like you too much to be worried."
"i'll protect you." he says, so serious and so lovely. "i won't let anybody hurt you."
"i know, baby." you say, and james visibly loves the word baby coming out of your lips.
he can only kiss you more after that. the night is long and it's full of promises, you are both so tired to think. it will be okay, you know that. it should be okay when he kisses you like this, like you are the most precious thing in the world. you kiss him back, trying to be brave enough for his heart. for now, it's good. james will make sure it'll be better.
#james potter#james potter x reader#james potter x you#james potter x fem!reader#james potter fic#james potter imagine#james potter fluff#james x reader#james x you#james x fem!reader#bodyguard!james#bodyguard!james potter#bodyguard!james x reader#marauders#marauders fic#marauders imagine#bodyguard!james potter x reader#bodyguard!james x you#bodyguard!james x fem!reader#bodyguard!james potter x rockstar!reader
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𝐑 𝐎 𝐎 𝐌 𝐌 𝐀 𝐓 𝐄 || m i n g i
"She is rare and real. I'm not letting her go."
"He was attracted to rawness and realness, to sharp edges and straightforwardness. And when suddenly, you dropped the act of perfectionist he, in fact, disliked and revealed your true nature, you became all what he needed in a woman that his hands, lips and tongue were so eager to worship."
𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 : after failed attempt to impress your handsome roommate, you decided to stop making a fool out of yourself and went back to the old, unimpressive you. Lack of dress code around the house and general chaos came back for good. Little did you know, the "hard-to-impress" roommate began to see you with very...very different eyes.
𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 : m i n o r s d o n o t i n t e r a c t , explicit language, fingering (f/recieving), intense cunnigulins, doggy style, cum on a back, unprotected sex, mdom, hair pulling.
𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 : Mingi x (f)reader
𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞 : smut, little fluff, body imperfections appreciation
𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 : 5k
07.35 pm. Friday evening. Everyone's favorite.
A moment of relief and appreciated freedom. A precious time of your boss having no power to control you. Your annoying coworkers are nowhere to be found to screech above your head. A piece of paradise where you can begin to enjoy the weekend to the fullest.
Of course, it depends on people and their individual understanding of what "to the fullest" means. To you, it meant laying in bed, in the most comfy clothes, binge watching anime while devouring not so healthy food, drinks and snacks.
You craved McDonald's today. No, you actually had been craving it since the early hours of Monday. And now it was time for you to treat yourself, give in to pure indulgence. No one could oppose this polygamy relationship between you, BigMac, chicken nuggets, fries and Sprite tonight.
Thankfully, you could skip the usage of the restaurant app, many a times they screwed up your order. You overheard your roommate talking something about leaving to help his friend with something. He could easily pick up your food on his way back and bring it right into your gluttonous arms. What a lucky day.
You giggled in pure happiness.
*
The man's movements stopped abruptly. His arm hung midair with half of it already in the sleeve of the black jean jacket.
Your sudden disgustingly adorable giggles caught Mingi's attention as he stepped in the living room, trying to get to the hall. He unconsciously gazed in the direction of the sounds of joy. His sight was flooded by the light inside your room, door opened just enough for his eyes to almost see your bare bottom on display.
Only God knew how much he wished he didn't look.
"Fuck." He mumbled as quietly as he could, thanking the noises coming from your laptop for hiding the growl his throat pushed out.
The rapid increase of his pulse and need for deeper breaths, made him throw spirited curses to his own self. Nevertheless, the black eyes studied you in silence.
He seemed to examine you like one of the paintings on the Sistine Chapel's ceiling, even though you laid there on your belly, only in your oversized, gray T-shirt and cotton panties with some pink ribbons on it. You were kicking the air with your feet hidden in socks that dazzled eyes with bright yellow baby chicks.
With resistance, his arm finally submerged into the jacket's sleeve, but still, Mingi didn't move from his spot. His legs simply refused to listen to their master. Boldly watching you, he seemed to be studying your uncovered parts by heart.
Your full thighs that looked as if they were inviting him to grab a handful of them. The slight cellulite that only proved how juicy your flesh was. It was almost painful to watch you, so unaware that you were fulfilling all his kinks and fantasies.
He clenched his teeth at the sudden throb between his legs.
He had to leave. Now. Of course due to business to tend to, but mostly because he was a heartbeat away from falling on his knees, crawling to you and begging you to let him touch you.
Despite the rational realization, he did not move an inch.
Your stretch marks glistened in the lamps light like translucent tattoos. He couldn't stop the sudden images of him kissing each one of them in his head.
The worst was yet to come as his eyes landed on the folds of your ass emerging from underneath the panties. The rolls of flesh where your thighs connected with your butt awakened a destructive urge to sink his fingers around them, to kiss and bite.
The unforgiving pulsing in his pants almost made him storm in your room. He needed to try to gain control again, he was not a wild beast after all.
Pinching the skin on his forearm, Mingi hissed at the unpleasant feeling.
"I'm leaving! I'll be back in two, three hours!"
He yelled this information more to remind himself rather than you. With clenched fists, he forced his legs to walk up the door.
"Mingi!"
No, please stay where you are, he thought panicked.
He didn't dare to turn around in case you jumped out in front of him
"Yeah?" No one knew how much effort he put in that one word.
"Could you buy me McDonald's on your way back? The usual!?"
Thank God, you were too lazy to leave the room but the sweet tone you had made him wrapped around your finger, made the devil on his shoulder laugh like a Disney villain. You must sound absolutely heavenly when you begged for other things in your mouth.
"Ok!" he agreed, voice slightly breaking but firm. He shook away the thoughts before he turned back around and said them aloud.
***
Mingi's tone sounded somewhat annoyed, making you think.
"Maybe I should've used the app instead."
Feeling bad, you looked in the darkness outside of your room after hearing the door begin to shut. You didn't manage to see him but what you did notice was your door being way more opened than what you remember it was.
Your frowned eyes lowered to your lower body. Slightly judging your naked legs, you realized your shirt was rolled up your waist which revealed your whole ass and your favorite panties.
"Oops."
Mingi either walked right past your room and didn't notice anything or he saw you with all of your grace. It took you a long second laying in stillness, trying to look for some sort of embarrassment in yourself, but eventually you rolled back on your belly.
"Ah, never mind" you shrugged and went back to drool over the tattooed Sukuna on your laptop screen.
Mingi had never shown any interest in you for all these years of living under the same roof. He was nice and a great friend but that was where it ended. Nothing more.
Oh well.
When your friend moved out to live with her boyfriend, you had a hard time finding a new roommate. The house, despite being an amazing place, was pretty far from the city center. Not a lot of people would decide to take long journeys to their workplace.
You lived alone for six months until one day you got a call. The man on the other side was interested in the room beside yours as he worked from home and liked being away from the city noises.
You had to admit, you preferred to live with another woman but that time you were desperate so you offered him to come and talk about the deal.
The memory of his frame still roamed in your mind, as it took up almost all the space of the entrance. You loudly gulped before even greeting him. And you were nervously swallowing for the next few months when he officially became your roommate.
At the beginning you tried to shape his view of you as the best. You changed your "house outfit" to more covered and neat, to make him think you have class and to hide the unattractive marks of your body. Meals you made were more sophisticated, and you followed a more healthy lifestyle. Even the gym lived to see you within its walls. Your room was cleaner than the ones in the ads of cleaning products. And most of all, everything about you had to look and smell like a volcano of femininity.
How lame of you.
To those days, you still wondered why you were doing all of that, to impress a dude that had absolutely no obligation to fall for you. All just because you were single and he was hot? Well, he was more than hot and you were basically covered in dust from singlehood. Still, it was unnecessary and you wasted time on doing things you didn't even enjoy.
After realizing your own stupidity, you went back to your old habits which actually allowed you to get more comfortable around him and in your own house. As the ties of attempting to impress someone disappeared, you quickly slid back to your messy, untamed, normal self.
For his misfortune.
The change of your aura around him was rapid and it took a 180° turn. One day you seemed to calculate every step you took and the next day the scheduled life was gone. It gave its place to chaos.
Truly, he disliked your visible chase after perfection and social media influence victimhood. It made you look almost robotic. You also seemed to force yourself to do most of it, especially going to the gym.
He did not know what dictated the sudden change but Mingi was glad that somehow due to it you finally became more relaxed and looked more like yourself.
However.
While you quickly found your comfort, he began to fall into a void of crushing lust and decreased self control, more and more everyday. The views like the one he just saw, were now on a daily basis. It was exhausting - pretending he was unaffected while in reality it trapped him entirely.
He was attracted to rawness and realness, to sharp edges and straightforwardness. And when suddenly, you dropped the act of perfectionist that annoyed him and revealed your true nature, you became all what he needed in a woman that his hands, lips and tongue were so eager to worship.
The way you moved, unaware of how feminine you were with something so simple like reaching for a coffee cup. The way you smelled, even after you stole his shampoo since you forgot to buy yours. The way you were all blushed after the steamy shower and paraded in only a towel around the apartment. The way you laughed out loud without trying to hold it in. Mingi melted at the sight of how excited you got for food, or when you got a text the postman was on their way with the new books you ordered. Or that a new season of your favourite show was out. Everything now was like sweet bait for his bee-like mind.
Mingi halted beside his car and looked at his reflection in its windows. Despite the twilight, he still saw the flames in his own eyes as all these thoughts of you flashed before them. The flames were just a tiny portion of the hellfire devouring him from inside.
Did he officially reach his limit? Somehow his mind kept fighting his body, however it began to realize it was outnumbered.
The first thought is the best.
Instead of the car keys, Mingi reached for a phone in his pocket. He didn't wait long for his friend to pick up the call.
"Sorry, man. I won't make it. You need to find someone else to help you with furniture." He informed the man on the other side with no words of greeting.
Hearing the need for explanation, he sighed like all he carried were troubles.
"Old case came up. I have to deal with it at last."
***
Fictional men. Book ones or 2D ones, it didn't matter. Your all time guiltiest, of guilty pleasures. Oh, how you wish they suddenly came to life, knock at your door and solve all your problems and fulfill all your fantasies.
"Ganbare, ganbare." you heard from the speakers as one of your new anime daddies spoke up.
"What the fuck, Sukuna?" You whined at the scene, burying your face in the pillow placed under you. You wanted to whine some more at the perfectly matched dubbing but the sound of doors abruptly opening and shutting caught you off guard.
Mingi left not whole five minutes ago. It had to be him. You hit the space button to stop the video.
"You forgot something?" you asked, listening closely, hopefully you were right.
"Yes."
The slight panic and insecurity that began to shape disappeared at the voice of your roommate. You turned your head back to the screen and restarted the video.
The music and a fight scene was loud enough to mute the sound of steps that entered your room. Only the sudden weight, pulling the bed down made you realize someone was indeed inside there with you.
You tried to look at Mingi, expecting to see him sitting on the edge of your bed for some unknown to you reason. But before you could even turn your head around, out of nowhere his arm appeared above your head, closing your laptop with his finger.
You couldn't look up but you felt it with all your being. Mingi hung above your entire frame, his arms on both sides of you, your legs trapped between his. His mouth, dangerously near your ear.
"I forgot to make something clear." He let out a growl he didn't have to control anymore, sending chills that were like a rifle series, from your head to your toes.
You were too stunned to form a word, feeling the temperature rise incredibly fast. Mingi took it as a chance to continue.
"If we're going to live together, we have to compromise, (y/n). I don't know what you're trying to accomplish, being so careless around me. If you wanted to seduce me, you succeeded. Congratulations."
Seduce him? No, you stopped trying three months ago. Now you were just living your life. How could he get it all backwards? Was it possible that the you being comfortable in your own skin, the chaotic you kept him awake at night?
You would scoff from the irony but, the position you were in and the whole man above you — with his lips so close to your neck, did not allow you to do anything but lay there like a mouse snared in a trap.
"If you didn't then please have mercy on the poor me and restrain yourself a little, so I could eat, sleep and coexist with you in peace and not fight the urge to pin you down to the first surface in sight and beg you to let me worship every inch of your body."
You were still silent, which made him spread his arms further and lean closer to you.
"Got it?" He asked, which sounded more like a threat.
Mingi had seen you in your most vulnerable position, and that had him speaking like he was a slave to your body. You smiled to yourself, at the confidence boost.
It was time to make a move.
He flinched at the unexpected touch on his crotch. He looked down to see your feet in bright socks brushing his clothed dick in wave-like motions.
"So, no McDonald's then?" You asked, pulling your head back to show him the fake disappointment on your face.
"(y/n)..." he begged, fighting the need to grind his hips.
"What can I do?" You shrugged, still not letting go of the act.
You did have him in your hands.
You suddenly turned around on your back and positioned yourself more comfortably as he pulled away a little in surprise. He looked you up and down, at your hands playing with your shirt, legs spreaded as if they were inviting him in. His grasp on the sheets tightened, trying to maintain maximum control.
"And what if I told you that I won't restrain myself?" You taunted with a pout, holding his dark gaze that came back to your face.
You were challenging him. He licked his lips at the lavious sight. The tightness in his pants bothered him more with every second of the view underneath him.
Your smile faded, giving its place to sultry expression. One of your legs raised and began brushing on his side.
"What if I also told you, you can pin me down to the first place you see and do whatever you want to me?"
The joy of having an upper hand didn't last for long. His move was fast and decisive — Mingi grabbed your flirting leg, stopping it from escaping as he lowered himself down onto you, pinning you to the bed with his weight.
The man's lips brushed yours, "I have a rule, you know."
"And what rule is that?" You battled the impulse to lick his plum mouth.
"No sleeping with roommates just for the sake of a peaceful life under the same roof." He enlightened you, putting your legs on his hip, next grabbing a handful of your plushy thigh. You inhaled sharply at the power he did it with, "But you make it absolutely impossible to follow."
You smiled devilishly, "So, you had a rule."
His lips felt juicier and softer than you imagined. And you imagined them an ungodly amount of times. It felt like biting onto the ripest fruit with all the juices exploding. It would've been a salvation on a hot summer day. But in this case, an unforgiving heat fell onto your body, burning your veins and showing on your cheeks.
The kiss quickly turned from delectaing, getting familiar to a violent clash of teeth, tongues and mouth, all of it accompanied by loud wet noises. The kiss broke as every ounce of oxygen left your lungs. You grabbed your shirt to finally get rid of it but he halted your plans.
"Leave it. I'm fucking you in this." He promised, at the same time groaning as his eyes filled with your breasts falling out of your only top piece.
He'd seen them unbrotherly bouncing under your oversized shirts almost everyday. Most of the time with no bra. Many times with erected nipples. They were teasing him while covered, which definitely woke a fetish in him. A fetish he never knew he had. A fetish he developed because of you.
"Why?"
Seeing you like this everyday got him laid in his bed and spent many nights imagining these scenes. Too many to not let it come to reality.
"Don't ask." He breathed out, while pulling the pillow from underneath you to put it on a side.
You didn't even have time to be confused as your nipples caught in his attention. One grabbed by his teeth and lips, the other twisted between his impatient fingers. Your back arched giving him all the access he needed. Mingi got the sweetest of whimpers out of you while kissing, sucking and massaging your tits that desired to fit in his big, untamed hands.
With kisses down your belly, he left your soft breasts, pulling your down shirt onto them. You squirmed in disappointment when your bosom lost his attention. But then he got dangerously close to your clothed cherry.
"I always admired your underwear collection but that is something else", he grinned, with his face hanging above your pussy like a cloud with a heavy rain over thirsty ground, "I thought these were ribbons…"
Once again he looked at the little pink tits painted all over your pelvis.
"I also have a version with little vaginas. Wanna see?" You grinned back and grabbed a string of your panties on your hip. Pulling it, you quickly let it go which made a sound from a contact with your flesh.
His grin faded away at that little gesture of yours. Why did the bare minimum have him raging in lust? What kind of sorcery did you use?
"Maybe later."
He grabbed the side of your underwear as you and pulled all of it down. Your cute panties landed somewhere behind him.
You were all exposed to his darkened, lusty eyes.
"I have a real one to look at…" with every word he made sure his hot breath embraced your throbbing pussy. "...as well as lick, suck and fuck."
"Mingi…" you immediately responded with a moan to his taunting. Your hips began to slightly twirl in front of his face when he positioned himself between your full thighs. They went up the next second, held by his decisive hands. He revealed every inch of your quivering womanhood to himself.
"Fuck, (y/n)" he whined at the sight of you, "Stunning. "
You felt cold air blowing on your folds. This little fucker. Your eyes darted onto him. Your roommate seemed to have fun, watching you struggle and wiggle while all he used was just air.
"Mingi, please" you begged shamelessly, "Hold on to your words, would you?"
"...as well as lick, suck and fuck." Oh you were funny.
"Right." he scoffed in amusement.
His giggles were muted by his lips attaching with your dripping pussy. Air got caged in your lungs, fingers immediately tangled in his fluffy hair.
Tongue lapped at your poor clit, mouth mercilessly sucked it in between. Raw sounds of your juices blending with his building saliva resonated in the room as well as deep in your soul.
"Fuuck." You were melting at the touch of his warm muscle, wandering around your folds.
Mingi was quickly advancing with his actions. His left hand went around your right thigh, fingers reached to the upper part of your pussy.
Your folds were spread, reminding him now of butterfly wings. He licked his lips at the vision of the source of all the nectar he was tasting. You were wet beyond his expectations.
The index finger of his free hand now traced around the edges of your soaking hole, that were closing and opening under his touch.
You spasmed at the quick, single and almost dramatic licks that were gracing your opened clit. His eyes fed on the lewdness, glowing in yours.
"You won't let me cum so quickly, will you?" You almost cried out.
Damn that grin of his.
"Oh no, baby. I will make you scream in a second."
Sudden invasion of his finger made you raise your hips, however he quickly pinned back down. The movement was slow at first as if he was doing a recognition of your interiors.
"So soft and warm, as I imagined it to be." He complimented you with a hum, "So inviting."
The middle finger answered the invitation, and join its neighbor inside you. There were no slow movements this time, no teasing. The pace was brutal, accompanied by your clit being violently sucked by his plumb lips.
"Mingi, fuuuck!" You screamed as loud as you were allowed in this condition.
The flood of pleasure, as much as it was welcome, came unexpectedly fast and powerful. It detuned your senses, took your breath away, controlled your body and whole being. You didn't know what to do with your hands, what to grab onto. Eventually they landed on your breast, adding more fuel to the fire happening between your legs.
His fingers pumped in and out of you, your rich juices made it much easier for them to move. Mingi sucked on you mercilessly, hamming loud which sent vibrations in the spot he was sending all his attacks towards.
With the last ounce of sanity, you quickly registered the knob forming in your abdomen and that it was about to come undone, brutally.
"I'm cum-ming" you intended to scream but all you could master was a whisper.
At those words his fingers gave up on leaving your walls and stayed deep inside them. You felt them curl inside, gluing to your core while rubbing and pushing onto it.
"Yes! Yes, right there!" You grabbed his head again to keep him in place, "Right fucking there!"
"Give me all of it, baby!" he said and reattached with your clit again, quickly shaking his head to have you absolutely crashing, "All of it!"
Legs, framing his face began to tremble. Cumming intensively, you were crying out the curses of pure euphoria. Your vision blurred. You saw no shape, no color as his fingers hadn't stopped. He led your orgasm in all the directions he wanted.
You had always been loud during sex but his skills made you reach new volumes. Your essence flooded his fingers, leaking out onto his mouth and chin. He began slowly moving inside you again to ride your ecstasy.
Mingi took his time before finally leaving your throbbing cunt. Fingers slowly slid out of you, all wet, glistening in the light. No drop was left as the man collected everything off you and of himself, ending the act with a loud pop sound. You used this moment to calm down and regain your breath control.
You didn't say anything as he climbed up on you with kisses and your heated faces aligned. Both breathing heavily, you looked at each other. You didn't stay silent and still for long but those few seconds were worryingly intimate. There was something between you two. You couldn't say what it was but it was there, tangible. You saw it in his eyes, that he in fact noticed that too.
Mingi allowed you to strip him off his black shirt and take your time to touch his chest, shaped abs and veiny hands that now rested on your sides. He felt his ego grow, seeing you worship his sun kissed muscles with awe.
"How do you want to take me?"
He raised his brows at your sudden question.
That reaction of his made you smile. Maybe he wasn't that hard to impress after all.
"You want to tell me you've never seen me in certain positions?"
"I have." He spoke before even the thought of other options of answer occured. However, Mingi didn't feel embarrassed with his honesty. Oh yeah, he'd seen you in many positions, but there was one specific simple fantasy that constantly appeared in his mind.
His hand reached for something above your head and next second you heard the sound of anime resonating in the room again.
Now you were surprised.
"Turn around, on your belly." He uttered, his eyes looking at you but his thoughts were somewhere else, deep in the dark corners of his brain.
You bit your lip as you realized.
Mingi wanted you in the position he had seen you almost everyday. In the position he saw you also today before leaving and coming back to take the business in his hands. He wanted to fuck you while you lazily laid before the screen. In your oversized shirt, colorful socks and your ass up on display.
How many times did he have to control himself to not let everything go loose when he saw you like that? How many times did he fight his corrupted mind while you walked and laid around the house unaware? You would never know.
Turning around, obeying him, you let him know you take all of it – all his needs and fantasies.
He helped you position the pillow underneath your pelvis and with the kiss on the back of your head, he got up to get rid of his jeans.
You felt familiar excitement as you looked at the anime going off but all you heard was a sound of an unbuckling belt. Wetness between your thighs increased along with the temperature, and you felt dizzy. It seemed like you were about to stand in flames.
His weight sunk in your bed again and you shivered at his mouth close to your ear.
"What you're doing, baby? Just keep watching your show."
The man's act of confusion was too good, his unearthly deep tone making you swallow a moan. Was it a punishment for you being so mindless about what you were doing to him?
His still wet fingers sunk in the flesh of your ass. He was massaging, squeezing and smacking it until he was satisfied. You looked at the screen but you saw nothing, entirely focused on his touch and sensation. You bit on the collar of your shirt as you felt Mingi sitting on your thighs like on a cushion. He put most of the weight on his hand but you still felt his hot skin pushing onto yours.
"Mingi…" his name in your mouth carried heavy pleas.
But he didn't answer. Instead you found yourself gasping at the velvet touch of his tip, rubbing between your cheeks and folds.
Up and down.
Up and down he spread his precum on all of you.
You couldn't see it but you felt his impressive width. You dig your nails in the sheets as your hips begin moving. You needed him inside, demolishing you.
"You're so soft and wet." He praised you. "All for me to finally enjoy."
"I'm begging you…" you mumbled with your shirt still between your clenched teeth.
He seemed to like bringing surprises as he slid into you without a warning.
"Aahh." You whimpered at the sudden stretch of your walls.
He went into you slowly, letting you adjust to his size. Mingi felt you were engulfing him more and more with every push.
"You're adorably tight." He wanted to sound playful but failed as your walls cramped around him and a set of pleasure went through him. "Shit."
He raised up a little on his knees and used your waist to support himself. Your lower body was caged, he could've done and was doing anything he wanted. He rolled his body at an even pace while going in and out of you. The bed rocked along with you, the frame hitting the wall behind it.
You face dropped from the screen as you tried to look at the cause of your state. Your loud moans, now drowned the sound of the anime in the background. They became even louder as his hand suddenly wrapped your ponytail around its wrist, pulling your head back.
You were facing the screen again.
"Watch. The. Show, (y/n)." He hissed.
And you were. You couldn't focus on the graphic, characters and especially not on the plot. All that filled your mind was the absolutely superior pleasure as your roommate was bulldozing you from behind. But still, your eyes were glued to the screen.
The tempo fastened as he let go of your hair. He pinned into you crazily, his balls smacking your sensitive clit from behind. Skin to skin, birthing clapping noises at an even pace.
The grab on your waist tightened. His moves became desperate, chasing the promising high. Mingi began to lose it. So did you.
"I'm clo-ose" you breathed out, shutting your eyes.
The laptop closed again, cutting the irritating noise. All he wanted to hear was your moans and mumbling, signs he owned you.
"Cum all over my cock." He demanded.
His hand was now positioned on both sides of your head. He raised up and with all his weight he fell onto you, sinking deeper than ever. His thick cock and every pulsating veins, adorning it, rubbed all the right places to make your sanity go to sleep and sexual madness to wake up. The power he was invading now you was too much for your body's ability to control.
"Min-gi, aah!" You came undone once again because of him and with the way he made you feel, you knew it wouldn't be the only time.
Heavenly bliss made your eyes roll in the back of your head as it fell on the bed from withering pleasure. A string of saliva oozed from your parted lips. You grabbed firmly onto his wrists and just let him ruin you until he felt like the work was done.
"Fuuuck!" he moaned as your walls grabbed his hard cock in whole, sucking him mercilessly, "Fuck, (y/n). Fuck, fuck aah!"
He quickly pulled out of you as a part of his fantasy was finishing on your naked back. Humping himself onto your ass, he took his time to shoot all the hot load, painting your skin in white as well as watch you laying there, nicely fucked up by no one else but him.
Leaning his forehead to the back of your head, he inhaled your scent as if he breathed comfortably for the first time in a very long time.
"There's no way I'm keeping my hands to myself from now on." He said, having a hard time speaking from the tempo he graced you a minute ago, "No matter what you or I will be doing."
You stroke his forearm, enjoying his closeness. You had no strength to open your eyes so you just smiled.
"Same."
He kissed your head, having dozens of butterflies going crazy in your stomach.
"What are we gonna do?" He broke the comfortable silence. Mingi tried to hide it but you picked it up - the worrying hue to his voice.
The bridge was burned, true. There was no return from what you two did. But you had a choice and made it. You chose to accept your needs and desires.
"We'll figure something out." You hoped, keep smiling as every cell in your body was telling you it might be a start of something beautiful.
After all, he saw the real you. The imperfect, flawed and raw you and it made him let his armour break. You were not letting him go that easily.
He smiled in the crook of your neck.
"Does it mean you will be walking naked around the apartment from now on?"
You recreated the same joyful giggle that made him look inside your room and began it all.
"Maybe."
#ateez#ateez smut#ateez headcanons#ateez reactions#ateez imagines#ateez scenarios#ateez x reader#mingi smut#song mingi#ateez mingi#kim hongjoong#park seonghwa#kang yeosang#jeong yunho#choi san#jung wooyoung#choi jongho#kpop smut#hongjoong smut#seonghwa smut#yunho smut#yeosang smut#san smut#wooyoung smut#jongho smut
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A Misunderstanding- Epilogue
Father Miguel O’Hara x Mother Spider Reader
Pt. 1
Art credit: I couldn’t find the artist. Please lmk if you know who it is.
Note: Not the full photo.
Summary: Little moments during your 9 months of pregnancy waiting for your little bundle of joy. And this time, with Miguel.
Hope you enjoy this chapter. I’m sorry I got it you you guys so late. But I hope it’s a sweet ending to this story.
I apologize for any grammatical mistakes I missed
Enjoy💕
Wc: 6.1k
____________________________________________
Month 3
The small cracks and imperfections on the ceiling have become memorized as you lay on your bed feeling miserable for the hundredth time this month. Ever since you found out you were pregnant about a month ago, you have had a serious case of morning sickness.
You've been critically bored since your OB/GYN recommended bed rest during your morning sickness. And knowing Miguel, he followed the doctor's recommendation exactly, making you stay in bed or couch most of the day.
"Here, mi amor." Miguel handed you a plate of chicken nuggets and green beans. Ever since you cooked Mateo chicken nuggets weeks ago and tried one, it's the only thing you haven't thrown up. Your nose scrunches up at the site of the green beans. One thing you hated, or the baby hated, was vegetables during your morning sickness.
"You need to eat something healthy. Just please eat some of them." Miguel pleaded with you as he sat down next to you on the bed and continued working. He's been staying home most of the time to handle household duties and Mateo.
"Well, it's your baby that's making me not like them. But thank you for the food." You pout as you eat your food. Miguel chuckled at your comment as he looked at a mission report.
After you forced yourself to eat the green beans, which from Miguel's perspective was a comical sight as you made a face every time you took a bite. But half an hour later, as you leaned against Miguel for comfort as he wrapped an arm around your waist, you felt a sudden surge of nausea. But instead of rushing to the bathroom, you sat there, not needing to vomit, as your eyes grew wide in shock.
"Oh my god, I think my morning sickness is improving." You cheer as you look at Miguel with a big smile. He turns to you with the same smile as he kisses your forehead. "I'm glad to hear that, cariño."
"Now I don't have to be on constant bed rest! Finally! Maybe I can even go back to work? Not for missions, of course, cause I know that would practically give you a heart attack if I did. But at least doing some desk work?" You are pleased with Miguel. One good thing about dating the leader of Spider Society was that you didn't have to worry about missing work. But the downside, too, is that he's the leader.
"Alright, fine. Of course, I miss you at HQ, but you know why I stress about you being pregnant in such a dangerous environment." Miguel looked at you as his eyebrows furrowed and a pout on his face. He was worried for you and the baby. And you understood where he was coming from.
You cup the side of his face as you gently brush your thumb across his cheek to ease his worries.
"I know I'll be safe since you will be there to protect me. And you built Spider Society from the ground up. You know it's safe."
"But what if an anomaly broke out and hurt you both. I'll never forgive myself." Miguel continued to worry.
"Miggy, I'll be fine. I'm Spiderwoman too. Plus, if Jess can be pregnant and still do her full job, I can do mine too." Your words finally reassured him as he smiled down at you and kissed your lips lovingly. You get up from the bed to Miguel's disappointment as he wants to continue holding you in his arms. But his disappointment was quickly replaced with joy as he saw your small baby bump as you walked into the bathroom to get ready.
Today was the day that you and Miguel would reveal that you were pregnant to your friends at Spider Society and later in the day with your family.
Miguel, in his own way, was excited about the reveal to your family. But he was slightly annoyed to tell the teenage spiders and the others. Like, tell Jess. But making a thing out of it. It was 100% your idea. But since he loves you and you were his world, he didn't mind the cheesy pregnancy reveal.
The two of you went through the portal after you both were ready as you walked to Miguel's office. As you entered, you saw Jessica watching the monitors with the rest of the gang, Peter B. MayDay, Hobie, Pavitr, Ben, and Gwen.
"Y/n! We missed you! Where have you been?" Said Pavitr as he jumped down from the platform. He was helping to look at the monitors before he came to you for a hug. You happily returned the hug, ensuring he didn't feel the baby bump.
"I've been busy with some things in my universe. So I wasn't able to come to HQ this past month." You say.
"Will you be coming back?" Asked Gwen as she also came up to give you a hug. Ever since you've been back to hq since being back with Miguel, you have become a big sister/mother figure to the teenage spiders.
"I am." A big smile appeared on your face; you couldn't fight the urge to hide the surprise. Miguel saw the look on your face and chuckled, a small smile appearing as he wrapped an arm around your waist and brought you to his side.
"Wow, something must be up if a boss man is smiling like that." Hobie chuckled, noticing the change of demeanor between the two of you. You look up at Miguel as you smile up at him. He smiled at you and gestured towards the group of curious spiders with a slight move of his head.
"Hey Peter, I'm so sorry we missed Mayday's 1st birthday, two weeks ago. Here's a gift for her." You say as you hold out a spider gift bag. Peter walked over with the adorable Mayday in his arms, who was babbling to herself.
"Aw, that was sweet of you. Thank you for the gift. Look, Mayday Auntie Y/n and Uncle Miguel got you a gift." Peter said the last sentence in his baby voice as he opened the bag for her. He grabbed an adorable spider kitty stuffed animal, which made Mayday squeal in excitement. Peter handed her the stuffed animal, and she hugged it.
"I'm glad she loves it. There is actually one more gift in there for her. It's a surprise." You smile as Peter searches through the bag to find the other gift. He drops the bag as he takes out a shirt for Mayday. He looks up at you and Miguel with a shocked and happy look.
"Oh my god! You guys!" Said Peter as he hugged the both of you.
"What's going on?" Asked Ben Reilly, who was speaking everyone else's mind. Peter turns around from hugging you and Miguel as he shows the shirt to the rest of the spider gang.
Printed in red and blue text with two iconic spider logos below the text.
Spider-Baby Duo!
"Omg! No way!" Gwen cheered as she jumped for joy and hugged you again. "Congratulations!"
"Another spider, baby! I can't wait to meet the little bundle!" Pavitr jumped for joy. Jess jumped down from the platform with a big smile on her face.
"Congrats, you two." Said Jess as she hugged you two.
"Thanks, everyone. We just wanted to tell you the reason for my recent absence. But I'm happy to return to work after my painful month of morning sickness." You smile from all the excitement as you glance up to see Miguel with a smile on his face enjoying it too.
You so badly wanted to tease him for showing he enjoyed telling your friends at Spider HQ. But you decided to tease him when you returned home to save him from the embarrassment of the other spiders teasing him. Though you would miss his ears and cheeks going red.
After talking and celebrating with everyone for a bit longer, you both had to return home to pick up Mateo. You wait with Miguel outside the school as you see the kindergarten class run out of the building. A familiar little curly-haired brunette with the most adorable face as he came running to you.
"Mama, you cane to pick me up!" Mateo hugged you as he jumped for joy to see you.
"Of course, sweetie. Mama feels well enough to drop you off and pick you up from school with Papa." You say as you hug your baby boy.
"Can you hold me, mama?" Mateo asked as he tried to jump into your arms. Miguel swooped in as he grabbed Mateo and lifted him into his arms.
"Wow there, papito. Remember, no roughhousing around Mama. She's caring your brother or sister in there. But I can carry you."
"Okay." Mateo pouted as he looked down at the ground, which hurt your heart. You look at Miguel as he looks back at you with a sigh knowing what you were asking of him.
"Come here, Mateo." You open your arms as Miguel hands him to you. It had been a while since you carried him, so you noticed the weight change.
"Yay!" Mateo smiled as he wrapped his arms around your neck and rested his head on your shoulder.
After getting to your new apartment, a penthouse in the same area as your old one, Miguel paid no expense to a lavish, not two, but six-bedroom and four-bath apartment. When Miguel originally told you about the listing, you thought it was too big for a family of four. But he said he wanted to buy a bigger place when you had more children. You lightly glared at him as you were already suffering from the current pregnancy. Of course, you didn't admit to him that you would want to have one or two more children. Two keep it an even number, of course.
When you found out you were pregnant, you both began to look at apartments. Of course, you had completely forgotten that Miguel's part-time job at Alchamex gave him very deep pockets. You insisted on paying as much as possible. Still, Miguel insisted on paying it himself, saying he wanted to give this to you and his children as a gift.
When you both finally agreed on a place, you moved in almost immediately, so you didn't have to worry about moving when the baby was born.
Two hours after you got home, you and Miguel made sure the house was ready for your family to come over, mainly your sister, her husband, kids, and your parents.
It was just your family as you and Miguel went to his universe to tell his brother Gabriel and mother Conchata the news. You had met them many times before, six years ago when you were dating Miguel. After Miguel moved in three months ago, you brought Mateo to visit his paternal grandmother and uncle, who adored him. Now you go at least twice a month to visit. Of course, the last time you went a week ago, you had revealed to them your pregnancy which they were both very happy about.
As you got your last earring on, you heard the doorbell ring. As you walked to the door, Mateo rushed by you. "Let me get it!" You chuckled as you saw him rush towards the door.
"Be careful, sweetie. Don't run." You smile as he opens the door revealing your sister, her family, and your parents.
"Hi!" Mateo half-yelled as he jumped up and down as his aunt and cousins walked in. Your niece and nephew run off with Mateo to his room to play, not before giving you a hug.
"Heyy! I've barely seen you this month! I've missed my little sister! Where's Miguel?" Nora walked in and gave you a hug.
"He's in the kitchen. He'll be-speak of the devil." You chuckle as he walks into the main family room as he walks to your side. "Hey, Nora, Luke." Miguel smiled.
"Do you guys want a drink? We have red, white, or something stronger." You offered.
"What are you having?" Asked Nora, which made you almost ruin the surprise, but you remembered the white grape soda juice that you bought from a winery a while back for Mateo. But you decided to use it tonight. Just to trick your sister and parents for a bit.
"Just a white wine. Hey, mom, dad. I've missed you." You hugged your parents. "Hi, sweetheart. It's good to see you." Said your father as he hugged you.
After settling down and catching up with everyone, you made sure the kids were in the living room with everyone else. Miguel grabbed two thin boxes and handed one to your mom and your sister.
"What is this?" Nora looked at the wrapped box with a confused smile on her face. You smiled wide. As you watch, your sister and mother open the tops of the boxes. Within a few seconds, you heard your mother gasp, and your sister scream in surprise.
"Omg! I'm going to be an aunt again! Congrats, you two!" Nora got up from her seat and hugged you.
"Congrats, sweetie." Your mother said as both she and your father also got up to congratulate you and Miguel. The kids all jumped excitedly to have another kid coming to the family to hang out and play with.
Month 4
You were in your fourth month of pregnancy, and despite it only being your fourth month, you felt like you were in your sixth for how big you felt. God, why did you have to have a baby daddy who could be characterized as a giant.
As you tried to put on one of your bras, you couldn't get the clasp to close. When you finally did get it clasped, your breasts were threatening to pop out, which, within seconds, they did. You groaned in frustration as you threw the bra on the ground.
Your damn breasts have gotten too big because of your pregnancy. You didn't think you would need to go to a maternity clothing store since when you were pregnant with Mateo, you didn't need to get maternity clothing. But guess every pregnancy is different.
You walked to Miguel's closet and grabbed one of his sweatshirts and a pair of your sweatpants. You glared at yourself in the mirror, not liking your lazy outfit choice.
Arms wrapped around your waist as large hands rested on your swollen belly. Your pout turned into a smile as you looked at your boyfriend through the mirror.
"What's wrong, Hermosa?" Miguel left kisses up
your neck to your cheek to help cheer you up.
"I don't fit into my clothes anymore because of this baby. My belly has gotten larger, my breasts too." You pout. You missed your curvy figure.
"I think you look beautiful, amor. And your breasts look like they were sculpted by god himself."
You turn to face him, and he keeps his arms around you and kisses you lovingly.
"How about I take you to buy some new outfits tomorrow?" You smiled at Miguel's kind gesture as you reached on your toes to kiss him. "That would be amazing. Thank you for offering."
Miguel fell on his knees, putting his hands on your belly as he smiled. You gently combed your fingers through his dark brown hair as you gazed at him lovingly and watched him whisper sweet things to your unborn child.
A tang of guilt etched into your heart as you didn't give Miguel the experience to do this when you were pregnant with Mateo. But you were happy to be able to give him the experience with both of your second children.
A gasp escaped your lips as you pressed your hand over Miguel's, as he looked up at you with concern. You look down at Miguel with a huge smile.
"It was the baby. I felt them move."
Month 5
It was a sunny day at the beach. You relaxed in your beach chair with a cup of lemonade in your hand as you enjoyed the sun's heat.
You take out your phone and choose a song from your playlist, resting it on your stomach for the baby to hear. The ocean view was gorgeous, but the site that caught your eye was Miguel with Mateo, who helped his son find shells and sea glass. It was a mission for you and the baby.
Mateo wanted to make something out of the shells and sea glass he would find on the beach. It made your heart glow as you saw Miguel bond with his son, holding the shells, rocks, and sea glass in his hands as he followed Mateo's lead.
After a few more minutes of watching them, you noticed them returning.
"Mamma, I collected so many pretty shells! Papa will show you! He was holding them for me while I collected them." Mateo ran over to you a few strides behind him, Miguel, who sat down in the chair next to you as he grabbed a container Mateo brought and put the shells and other pretty beach objects in there. He then passed it to Mateo to show you his favorite shells.
"Those look really pretty. I can't wait to see what you create with them!" You tell Mateo as you listen to story to each shell he shows you. You smile when you feel Miguel place a kiss on your cheek.
"How are you two doing?" He asked as he took your hand in his and kissed your knuckles.
"We're both doing good." You smile as you place the hand you held on your round belly. Suddenly both your eyes widened as you looked at each other with large smiles.
"Did they just?" Miguel smiled wide as he rested the palm of his hand on your belly.
"I know! They kicked! They only seem to do that when they can hear your voice. Guess we know who will be their favorite parent." You let out a chuckle as you watch Miguel move his hand on different places of your belly, where you would then find a light flutter in the area, which meant the baby was kicking.
"Come here, Mateo. Do you want to feel your younger sibling kick?" You ask your son as he gets up from his spot on the beach towel in excitement as he comes to you. You gently take his hand and place it on your stomach. As soon as you did, Mateo giggled as he felt the baby kick.
You were happy that your family was already getting love from your unborn baby. Still, you internally pouted as you felt left out. As if your youngest child read your mind, you felt them kick where your hand was placed as you whispered back to your round belly, "I love you too."
Month 6
Miguel was running errands all over the place for the gender reveal party. Though he thought it was a bit cheesy, you loved the idea of having one, so he ensured the party would be perfect.
He set the cake down on the dining room table. Half of it was blue, and the other half pink. Once the cake was cut, you would see if the cake was pink or blue.
You walked in with Mateo after picking him up from school. Miguel smiled when he saw you as he wrapped an arm around you and kissed your lips lovingly.
"Sorry I couldn't be there to pick up Mateo with you," Miguel said as he scanned his surroundings. The main living room was filled with pink and blue decorations. You gently touched his cheek and caressed his face, which he loved.
"You don't have to apologize for anything. You had errands to run for the party, which looks amazing. Thank you, Miggy." You lean up and kiss him again, which Miguel happily accepts.
"When do we find out?" Asked Mateo as he played with one of the balloons.
"When everyone arrives and is settled, we'll announce it." Says Miguel as you both chuckle at your son's excited attitude as he jumps around.
Another hour passed as you made sure all the snacks and drinks were out on the dining table when you heard the doorbell ring. Miguel kissed your cheek as he walked to the door and opened it revealing your spider friends in casual clothing holding baby gifts.
"Y/n! Oh my god, look at you. You're glowing!" Jess smiled as she hugged you. "Here you go. Something for the baby." She handed you a bag.
"Aww, thank you. Miguel and I can't wait to open it. If you are hungry or want a drink, there’s some snacks and champagne on the dining table. How's your baby boy?"
"He's doing good. Keeps me and hubby up late at night. But I still love him to bits despite the sleep deprivation." Jess chuckled as you walked over to the dining table to set down the gift with the others; you picked up a stork-shaped cookie. You picked up two cause your hunger this month has increased tenfold.
"These are cute." Said Gwen as she came up to you both and picked up one of the pinkish-blue cupcakes. "Thanks for inviting me, Pavitr, and Hobie. We can't wait to meet the baby! Oh here! This is a gift from all three of us. We hope you like it." She hands you the bag as you hug her in thanks before putting it on a table.
"I'm sure we'll love it." You smile lovingly at her. Those three teenage spiders were so adorable.
You let Gwen go back to mingle with Hobie, Pavitr, and Jess with your sister, who had arrived with your parents and her family not too long ago.
You were about to take a bite of one of the cookies when Miguel wrapped his arm around you from behind and pulled you against him as he grabbed your cookie and took a large bite out of it. Your jaw opened in shock before a pout was placed on your lips. "Hey, that was mine." You see him smirk as you take the rest of the cookie and take a bite out of it. Miguel chuckled as he kissed your cheek.
"I know. I just wanted to see that cute pout on your face, amor." You purse your lips into a smile as you playfully roll your eyes.
"Do you want to do the reveal?" Miguel smiled down at you. Your eyes brighten as you smile, starting to feel the excitement bubble up inside you; you nod.
"Hey, everyone! It's time!" You say in excitement as you try to stay calm but fail horribly. Miguel looks at your overjoyed attitude and smiles lovingly at you. You really were the light of his life.
Miguel grabs the plate and knife as you hold the knife with him. You both turn around and cut into the cake to make a slice. As soon as you lift it up, you smile brightly at Miguel as he looks down at you with the same happy expression. You both turned around and showed off the slice of cake to everyone.
It was pink.
Month 7
You took a deep breath as you sat down in a chair and placed a hand on your large belly. You tried to distract the feeling of your stomach tightening with the sounds of kids' laughter.
You opened your eyes to see your now six year old son running around with his friends at the arcade.
"Hey, are you okay?" Georgia touched your shoulder as she looked at you in concern.
"I-I'm fine. Just feeling some cramps." You give her a reassuring smile before you feel another stomach cramp. You grab your water bottle as you take a sip of water.
"Are you sure, y/n? Aren't you having contractions? I'm going to get Miguel." Georgia said as she was about to walk away before you grabbed her arm.
"It's Braxton hicks. I-I'm fine. I've had them before. If you tell M-Miguel, he'll take me to the hospital. It's Mateo's birthday. I don't want his special day ruined because the baby got in the way." Lauren approached you as you tried to convince Georgia not to get Miguel.
"The kids were asking when to cut the- y/n? Are you okay?" Lauren gazed at you with concern.
"Y-yep. It's Braxton hicks. No need to worry. They'll p-pass." You reassure Lauren as you try to stand up. It takes you a second, but you manage to stand up. "Let's cut the cake."
"Y/n, are you sure it's Braxton hicks? When I was pregnant with Simon, I went into early labor. But I thought it was only Braxton hicks. Maybe you should go to the hospital to be safe." Lauren gently guides you to Miguel despite your protests, but Lauren was more stubborn than her wife, Georgia.
She walks you over to Miguel, who is talking to a few other parents; his gaze turns to you when he notices you coming towards him. Miguel's smile was quickly replaced with a small frown as concern grew when he saw Lauren help you walk over.
"Is everything alright, cariño? Is it the baby?" Miguel brushed some of your hair behind your ear. You would explode if one more person asked you if you were alright.
"Y-yes. It's just Braxton hicks. I-I'm fine. Let's just cut the cake."
"How long have you been feeling this way?" You lightly glared at Miguel, knowing he would take you to the hospital no matter what you said. He sent you the same glare back.
"30 minutes." You tell him.
"How far apart are they?" You roll your eyes.
"Like 30 seconds. We're not-"
"I'm taking you to the hospital." Miguel gently placed his arm around your waist as he was about to lead you out.
"Miguel, no, we are not leaving our son's birthday. I'm fine. I can wait until after the party is over." You close your eyes, feeling another cramp. You sit down in a chair in protest.
"Amor, I'll carry you to the hospital if necessary," Miguel said as you both had a stare down. You take your phone as you call the doctor's office.
"To ease your worries, I'll call the doctor." Miguel nods, admitting defeat as you put the phone to your ear.
"Yep, Doctor says it's Braxton hicks." You say to Miguel. He holds out his hand, asking to talk to the doctor. You roll your eyes as you pass him the phone. After a few minutes, he hung up the phone as you arch your eyebrow.
"Yeah, alright. It's Braxton hicks. I wanted to see if you weren't lying just so I wouldn’t take you to the hospital." You smile at him in victory as he rolls his eyes playfully with a smile and kisses your cheek.
Miguel calls for the kids saying it's time for cake. Mateo sits with his friends at the table, jumping in his seat excitedly. You get your phone out and start a video as everyone sings happy birthday.
Tears brimmed the corners of your eyes as Mateo blew out the candles. You couldn't believe he was already six years old. You remember when he was just a baby sleeping in your arms.
"What did you wish for, Mateo?" Asked Simon, Mateo's best friend.
"I wished for my baby sister and me to get along. And I wish for a Nintendo Switch." Said Mateo, which made your heart glow. You felt as if an invisible weight was lifted off your shoulders. Mateo was excited to meet his baby sister.
You couldn't wait to meet her too.
Month 8
Your due date was in three weeks. In three weeks, there will be an infant in your home. It was a Friday night, and Mateo had a playdate/sleepover after school, so you didn't have to worry about picking him up until morning.
It was also a day when Miguel had to go into HQ to work, to his annoyance as he wanted to be home just in case the baby came early. You assured him you would be fine. Since he left, you have been in the nursery, ensuring everything was perfect before the baby came. You learned from one of your many pregnancy classes that what you were doing was called nesting. When you first learned about the term, you thought it was ridiculous. But now that it's happening to you, it wasn't so silly.
It was 1 am when Miguel got home. He expected you to be asleep in their bedroom, but when he noticed a light in the nursery, he went to check it out. And there you were, sorting through diapers, clothes, and other baby products. You were facing away from the door while folding baby clothes on the changing table.
You felt Miguel wrap his arms around you and place a kiss on your neck. But you barely noticed as your mind focused on ensuring you were ready for the baby's arrival.
"It's very late; you should head to bed." His words fell deaf to your ears. Miguel pouted as he turned your head and kissed your lips lovingly, which broke your trance.
"Oh, hi, Miggy. When did you get back?" You say as you go back to folding.
"A few minutes ago. Amor, how long have you been doing this?"
"When did you leave this morning?" You asked.
"Did you rest at all? Did you eat or drink anything?" Miguel asked, concerned for your well-being. You paused for a second, trying to remember what you did, but your mind went blank.
"I guess not." You say as you take the folded clothes and move to the set of drawers you put them away. Miguel follows you as he takes the clothes from your hands and puts them on top of the drawers.
"You need to rest."
"I will when I'm done." You gasp when Miguel picks you up bridal style and carries you to your shared bedroom. He then set you down gently on the bed.
" I love you, but sleep." He commanded as he kissed your cheek before getting ready for bed and getting into bed with you.
When the lights were off, and you thought Miguel was asleep, you carefully got up and out of bed and returned to the nursery. But of course, as soon as you walked into the nursery, Miguel was right behind you, giving you a small heart attack as he picked you up and returned you to bed.
This time when you both got into bed, he placed his arm around you so you wouldn't escape. You pouted up at Miguel as you both lay in bed. He kissed you on the lips before turning off the lights again.
"Buenas Noches, hermosa. Go to sleep."
Month 9
It was a week before your due date. And any day you could burst.
You woke up feeling fine this morning, and you and Miguel began your weekly morning routine with Mateo as you walked him to school. It happened after saying goodbye and walking a block from the school.
Your water broke. At first, you didn't 100% know what happened, but as soon as it did, you felt an unbearable pain in your stomach. It was a contraction. As your mind was finally coming to terms with what was happening. You registered that you were in labor. And your baby girl was coming today.
At your side, Miguel picked you up in his arms as he quickly returned to the apartment and grabbed your go back for the hospital. He then put you in the car and rushed over to the hospital.
Before you knew it, you were in a hospital gown with Miguel holding your hand, nurses all around you, and a doctor ready to deliver your child as they coached you through the contractions.
Even with the epidural, you still felt some of the pressure of the contractions, which were still painful. Time didn't feel real as you tried to push the baby out. It was your second time. Why did it feel like you had never given birth before? Your head rested on Miguel's shoulder as tears fell down your eyes.
"I-I c-can't. I'm too tired." You sob out loud. Miguel pressed his lips to your forehead. He hated seeing you in pain. It tore at his heart. He wishes he could remove the pain to make it easier for you.
"You got this cariño. You can do this. Five more minutes of pain for a lifetime of happiness." Miguel's words of affirmation brought some hidden strength inside you as you gave it one final push. And you were done.
You laid back against the hospital bed in tears of joy and relief when you heard the cries of your daughter.
"Mi amor, you did amazing. Thank you for bringing our baby girl into this world." Miguel kissed your head as a tear rolled down his cheek. He was overcome with joy as were you.
"Congratulations." Said the doctor as she passed you, your little bundle of joy in your arms. Tears began to pool in the corner of your eyes as you saw your daughter for the first time.
"Hi there." You say in a baby voice as you kiss your daughter's forehead. You see her move slightly in your arms. Even though she was only a few minutes old, you could see the strong O'Hara features she shared with her brother and father.
"What name have you chosen for her?" Asked one of the nurses.
"I was thinking of the name Mariana." You look at your baby girl before your gaze meets Miguel's. You could see his heart glow in his eyes as he looked at you in surprise as tears brimmed the corner of his eyes.
"Gabi's middle name?" Miguel said out loud to you.
"To honor her big sister." You say to Miguel as a tear falls down his cheek. The biggest smile spreads across his face as you gently give him your newborn daughter.
She was so tiny in his arms. Some of her features reminded him of Gabi, as he held his newborn daughter in his arms and gently kissed the top of her head. He smiled at you as another tear rolled down his cheek. "Mariana is perfect for her."
"Mariana Catalina L/n O'Hara."
Three Months Later
The sound of your daughter crying on the baby monitor instantly woke you up. Looking at the alarm, it was 2:15 am. She was hungry.
You were about to get up when Miguel touched your shoulder and kissed your neck. "Don't worry, amor. I'll get up. You go back to sleep."
Miguel stood up from the bed and walked out of the bedroom and towards the nursery. As he entered the room, he picked up his wailing daughter. "Shhhh, it's okay, Princesa. Papa's here." Miguel whispered as he cradled her in one of his arms as he walked to the kitchen to grab his daughter her bottle.
Within a few minutes of being in his arms, she calmed down as she cooed and giggled as she looked up at him with her big brown eyes.
He walked back to the nursery as he fed her. He rocked her in his arms after he finished feeding her. He could see her not falling asleep immediately, so he began singing her a lullaby.
You heard Miguel begin to sing to your daughter through the monitor. You got out of bed, unable to resist seeing the adorable sight in person. You quietly walk to the nursery, lean against the door, and watch Miguel lull your daughter back to sleep.
"Hush, little baby, don't say a word; Papa's going to buy you a mockingbird..." You hear Miguel sing.
Your heart melted at the sight. A memory you will always keep forever close to you. Once Mariana returned to sleep, he gently kissed her forehead before settling her back in her crib. You gently walked up to him as you both watched your daughter sleep.
"I thought you were asleep?" Whispered Miguel to you as he wrapped an arm around your waist.
"I couldn't resist not seeing her adorable face." You whisper back as you gaze lovingly at your daughter. "I can't believe it's already been three months since we brought her back from the hospital." You add.
"I know, it's going by too fast," Miguel said as he led you out of the nursery and back towards your bedroom. “We could give Mariana and Mateo another brother or sister in a year or two." Miguel added.
"Funny joke." You look up at him wide-eyed as you lightly chuckle.
"No, cariño. I'm serious."
The End
____________________________________________
Tag List
@theprettyarachnid
@crowleysthings
@gryffinclawstuff
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@miggyyyyohara
I hope you enjoyed this story as much as I did.💕
Stay tuned for “ An Unexpected Match.”
#miguel o'hara#spider man 2099#spider man: across the spider verse#miguel x reader#oneshot#oneshot requests#miguel o’hara fanfiction#miguel o’hara x y/n
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Like a Random Tuesday in December
steve harrington x afab!reader
words: 12,457
warnings: little bit of smut !! 18+ (minors dni) ; the smut is very brief so plsplspls do not expect a lot
summary: Reader had always had a crush on Steve, but he is not interested. Yet, when he starts to get closer to her, he realizes he made a mistake because it might be too late.
a/n: hiiiii. long time no see for a stevie fic... i apologize university is... you know. i started working on this since NOVEMBER of 22' i hope you can enjoy it, because i enjoyed writing it!
Y/n was five years old when she had her first kiss. She was part of the Dribbling Tots basketball team that her father had forced her to be part of. He had grown up as a sports guy, having met her mother at college while he played linebacker.
Although his first child was a girl, that didn’t stop him from doing whatever he could to make sure she would be the first woman in the NFL. Sadly, she was too young to join the PeeWee football team, so he had to settle for the next best thing.
But at five years old, Y/n didn’t understand the reason she was forced to play this game, and her fine motor skills were still below average, dribbling the really bouncy ball was hard. As an only child she wasn’t used to sharing her belongings either, so when a small chubby boy stole the ball from her, she crossed her arms across her chest and began to wail as loud as she could. Her father was one of the coaches and he tried to calm her down, but she wouldn’t budge.
The small chubby boy had come back to her, ball in his hand and held it out for her. The coach for the other team started to yell at him, “Steve, that’s not how we play basketball, son!” But the boy ignored him.
She sniffled, looking at the orange ball in his tiny hands. “That wasn’t nice.”
“I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.” He let the ball drop out of his hands and walked up to her, his innocent brown eyes nearly made her tears dry. His arms wrapped around her and she could hear the echoed “aws” from mothers watching. He broke apart from her but not without leaning in and placing a small kiss on her lips like she had seen her father do to her mother anytime she was upset.
One would think maybe that was when Y/n first had her crush on Steve Harrington. And maybe if she really thought about it, that’s when it began. Except, that stomach drop feeling and heart racing never occurred until the seventh grade on a random Tuesday in December. He had shown up to class late, rummaged through his backpack and sighed before looking behind him. She didn’t notice at first because she was etching her pencil into the desk.
“Hey.” He tapped his finger on the wooden desk.
She looked up at him, surprised, Steve Harrington hadn’t really talked to her since grade school. “Uh… hey?”
He gave her a charming smile, running his fingers through his hair which had recently been cut. “Do you have an extra pencil I could borrow?”
She had given him one of her favorite pencils, only a tiny scratch had been on it. Okay, it wasn’t her favorite, but when he had returned it at the end of class it became her most prized possession the rest of the school year. Well, until she lost it. But her crush never subdued throughout school.
Even watching the goofy big tooth boy grow taller, stronger, and more attractive she couldn’t help but feel her cheeks heat up whenever he was near. Her friends would tease her at lunch when she would stop mid-sentence because Steve had just stood up and caught a chicken nugget in the air or she would giggle at a joke she listened to.
But one thing was she never told him. Not once. Y/n saw the type of girls Steve Harrington went out with and she definitely was not the small and petite Nancy Wheeler. It seemed like her feelings towards Steve would be nothing more than a school girl crush. In fact, she had rarely thought about the dark haired boy since prom. Because although he looked sad, he looked pretty. And she swore he was about to ask her to dance until some redhead jumped in front of him. That was until he decided to start working at Family Video.
Keith mentioned there would be two new employees and all the training was on her, per usual. Y/n was Keith’s underpaid assistant but she never argued because he would eventually leave and she’d be crowned the new manager. But she didn’t expect on a Saturday morning that she would walk in to see Steve Harrington and a short haired girl named Robin Buckley waiting outside for their first ever shift.
She tried her best not to fumble her keys while unlocking the door or run into the cart of returned movies that the closers conveniently forgot to put away. She tried at least. The cart hit her hip so hard it fell down. She immediately cursed under her breath, bending down to pick up the spilled tapes on the ground.
Both new employees jumped to help her as she sputtered apologies and they didn’t have to help. Her breath hitched. Steve’s shoulder brushed against hers as he reached for a copy of Breakfast at Tiffany’s and suddenly she was back in Mrs. Robinson’s pre-cal class, warm cheeks, and that flip in her stomach that told her maybe her school girl crush hadn’t gone away. Lucky for her, she was the one who had been given the weekly task to make the schedule. She had ensured to never have a shift with him– at least alone.
She thought it wasn’t obvious she was actively avoiding him until one day he had come in with lunch for Robin. Except, Robin had already gone down the street to Dairy Queen with a friend. Steve’s face dropped when Y/n had broke the news to him. One would think him and Robin were together but it took three hours for her to come to the conclusion that they were nothing more than platonic.
Steve set the bag on the counter. He ran a hand through his hair, a strand fell down to his forehead, and she pathetically had to turn around to make sure she wasn’t drooling. “Do you want to eat lunch together?”
She froze. “W-what?”
Steve had already started to unpack the brown bag, shoving a fry in his mouth. “I don’t know what you like on your burger. Robin is weird and hates everything except cheese and pickles.” It was difficult to understand him with his mouth full of more salty fries and the fact she was still stunned. Steve must have noticed how she didn’t budge, staring at him with wide eyes because he looked up, tilting his head. “You're not hungry? Wait, don’t tell me. Are you one of those vegetarians? If you are, that's totally okay… you can eat my fries! Fries are a vegetable, right?”
She put her hand up. “No… I’m… thank you.” That was all she could manage to say before she grabbed the wrapped burger on the counter to take a bite.
“You don’t talk a lot, do you?” Steve wiped a dot of mustard from the corner of his mouth. “You never did in school.”
She giggled. “You never talked to me in school.”
“I didn’t?”
She tapped her chin and looked up as she pretended to go through her memories. “I recall one conversation when you asked to borrow a pencil.”
Steve made a sound and motioned his hands at her. “See!” His laugh was infectious, silky, and warm.
She had rolled her eyes, cheeks heated and stomach fluttered. “It’s okay. I never expected Steve Harrington to talk to someone like me.”
It wasn’t dramatic but his face dropped and eyes averted elsewhere. He took another bite of his burger, slow and deep in thought. She wanted to apologize. It was a harmless joke. Yet, she could tell his old self was a sore subject. “Sorry I was an idiot back then. So, don’t say that about yourself. You’re pretty cool.”
She looked down at her burger, avoiding the toothy grin plastered on his face. “You think I’m cool?”
Steve shoved the last bite of his burger in his mouth, shrugging. “Yeah of course you’re cool. You’re the one who convinced Keith to let us put a coffee machine in the break room.”
Her face fell briefly. “Yeah… um thank you again for the burger but I need to get back to work before the rush.” She was lying, and he knew that. There was never a rush until the evening.
He coughed awkwardly, grabbing his trash off the counter so he could place it in the bin. “Right. Well, I guess I’ll see you later?”
She only gave him a small smile, sighing in relief when the door chimed as Robin walked in, eyes wide at the sight of Steve. “I didn’t know you were working today?”
“I brought you lunch,” he answered with a bored tone, walking towards her.
“Oh… I was on a…” She looked over at the girl rewinding tapes, pretending not to listen to their conversation. “I was hanging out with April.”
Steve’s eyes widened. “April from the corner store? With the…?” He grabbed imaginary boobs.
Robin rolled her eyes, hitting him in the chest. “Gross, Steve. Are there any fries left? I’m still starving.” She grabbed the empty sack out of his hand, frowning. “I thought you said you brought me lunch?”
Steve made a sound, glancing at the girl behind the counter. “I had lunch with Y/n instead.”
Robin’s face contorted into something Steve knew all too well– mischief and curiosity. Robin loved to jump to conclusions.
“Stop,” he whispered so only she could hear. He started to mess with some tapes on a shelf so it looked less suspicious.
Robin threw her hands up. “I didn’t say anything.”
He narrowed his eyes looking back at the girl who was oblivious to the conversation and then back at his best friend. “She’s not my type.”
“I wasn’t your type either.” She jabbed back.
He blew a sigh out of his nose, opening his mouth to say something, but decided against it. He looked back at the girl.
Robin leaned closer, also bringing her voice to a whisper. “She definitely has a crush on you.” She snorted when Steve fumbled with a tape in his hand before placing it back. However, Robin took it and put it in a different spot– the correct spot.
“She does not. She doesn’t even talk to me!” He had said the last part a little too loud, but fortunately for him she had slipped into the storage room. Her ears were out of range of their conversation.
Robin thumped him on the forehead. “You dingus. She doesn’t talk to you because she has a crush on you, duh.”
Steve rubbed his hand over his face. “Even if she does have a crush on me. I’m not interested.”
Robin shook her head in disbelief, handing him the empty sack back. “Right. Because she’s not your type.” She didn’t allow him to answer, ending the conversation by telling him she’d see him later.
And of course, it took Robin exactly twenty-seven minutes to interrogate Y/n about Steve. Business was slower than usual, and her boredom turned into twenty questions. Robin had learned more about her co-worker in fifteen minutes than the few months she had been working there.
Her favorite food, color, and astrology chart. And now she was down to her last few questions. She needed to use them wisely. “So… what do you think about Steve?” Robin tried to be nonchalant.
Y/n didn’t react, but she noticed the way her shoulders tensed up. “Not sure what you mean by that.”
Robin shrugged, twirling a strand of hair around her finger mindlessly. “Oh… he just mentioned something to me. It’s probably nothing.” With her plan, she walked off, pushing the cart of returned tapes around, taking her sweet time to find their right places.
“Oh.” Was all Y/n had said before a customer walked in. But as soon as they walked out, Y/n joined Robin by the Horror section. “I’m curious. What did he say?”
Robin motioned her hand in a circle. “You know, this and that. How he thinks you hate him because you ignore him all the time.” It was a stretched lie. But it was her bait, and by the expression on the girl’s face, she was hooked.
“I… don’t hate Steve. Does he really think that?” Her face was full of concern. She even looked so worried her face was green as if she wanted to throw up.
Robin had to hold in the laughter. “It’s okay. I know it’s because you have a crush on him.”
She pushed the cart away, leaving Y/n behind. Her mouth had fallen open from shock. “W-what? No I don’t!”
“Okay,” Robin hummed.
“Even if I did like him. That’s not why I ignore him. It's a coincidence,” she continued.
“Don’t you make the schedules?” Robin’s brow rose, putting the last tape away. She leaned on the cart.
Y/n huffed, crossing her arms. “I do not have a crush on him.”
“You already said that.”
“And I’m repeating it because I feel like you don’t believe me.”
“Because I don’t believe you.”
The two stared at one another, neither wanted to break first. Y/n had always gotten along with Robin, but she never considered her a close enough friend to be asked such personal questions. She never went around trying to dive deeper into Robin’s romantic affairs.
Not that she ever saw her flirt with anyone that came in or talk about the very few cute boys that rolled in and out of Family Video.
It was Y/n who finally broke, the sound of the door chime turning her attention to an older woman hobbling in. The rest of the shift the two girls didn’t speak. But Y/n occasionally caught Robin looking over at her, a smirk plastered on her face. It was like Robin had figured everything out about her.
***
The inevitable occurred. It was Thursday, but not just any Thursday. It was Halloween. And Robin Buckley had caught the flu. Not only did Keith force her to cancel all of her late night plans, but Y/n had to work with Steve Harrington– alone.
She dreaded the shift as soon as she pulled up to her designated parking spot. Steve’s sleek BMW parked right next to it. Normally when she parked next to him, she always caught him doing his hair or checking to make sure his teeth were still white.
But today, there was no sign of him waiting in the car before their shift. Before she could question it, the door to Family Video opened, two girls came out giggling. Steve was the one holding the door. She couldn’t help it but to roll her eyes.
When he saw her get out of the car, he tilted his head, smiled softly, and waved at her. It was more than odd to see him show up before her. Keith already had a file full of tardiness warnings. “Nice costume.” Steve kept the door held open for her as she walked up to the store.
She instinctively touched the cat ears on her head. Steve followed close behind her back into the store. There were only a few customers browsing the store when she walked in. “Yeah, well thanks to Robin my plans on staying home doing nothing turned into scrambling to find something quick.”
Steve reached out and poked the orange and black ears, sniggering. “It wasn’t a requirement to wear a costume.”
She swatted his hand away and put a hand on her hip. “I know that. But it makes the shift more fun.”
“You could’ve made it more fun for me and dressed as one of the Pussycats.” He smirked, crossing his arms over his chest.
Her cheeks heated up. Y/n walked to the counter and picked up the folder for the closing shift check-list, scanning what needed to be done.
She glanced at the brunette who had followed her. He leaned against the counter, watching her. “If you should know, I was Josie last year for Halloween. This is my work appropriate costume.” She looked him up and down. “It’s a shame you didn’t want to dress up. You would have made a good Alan.”
His brows furrowed. “Who’s Alan?”
“The Pussycat’s roadie and Josie’s boyfriend.” Her eyes widened at what she had just said. She turned to face him, shaking her head violently. “I- I didn’t mean it like that.”
Steve licked his lips and opened his mouth as if he wanted to say something important. “I’m going to go check on our customers.”
She wanted to kick herself watching Steve give an awkward tightlipped smile, and walk away to the other side of the store. Instead, she had to put on a fake smile as she checked out customers. This was the exact reason she avoided being alone with him. Her awkward nature was always illuminated in her conversations.
And it seemed like the night only dragged excruciatingly slow. Occasionally groups of teenagers would come in like a herd, Steve scolding them not to run around. And then there were periods of times that it was just the two of them. The only sound came from the ticking of the clock and the film that was playing on the TV above the counter.
Then three familiar boys stormed into the store. There was a short curly-haired one, looking around as if he was on a mission. “Steve!” He had shouted towards her co-worker who was fixing a display.
Steve turned around with a huge smile. “Henderson!”
She couldn’t help but watch in bewilderment as the two greeted one another. “Where’s Robin?” The tall scrawny dark-haired boy of the group asked, coming up to the counter to get a piece of candy from a bowl that Keith had put out.
“Sick,” Steve answered him. He looked over at Y/n, who stood awkwardly as the three boys all made a sound of disappointment.
“Does this mean we can’t-” The curly haired boy’s words were cut off because Steve thumped him in the head, giving him a warning look. “What was that for?” He rubbed the spot, confused.
The other two boys kept quiet, as if they knew why Steve had tried to shut the boy up. “Let’s just go Dustin.” The dark skinned boy said. He motioned his eyes towards Y/n.
“Oh.” Dustin nodded, looking over at her. He gave her a toothy grin, his braces gleaming from the fluorescent lights. “Right… uh… well I guess we’ll see you later, Steve.”
The three boys all gave a disappointed sigh, their shoulders slouched as they made their way towards the door.
“Wait,” Y/n called out. The three boys stopped, turning around quickly. “You boys didn’t come in here to rent an R-rated movie… did you?” She raised a brow.
They all looked at one another.
“Or did you? Because my co-worker here lets you?” She tilted her head, trying to hold back the laughter from interrogating them. They gave a panicked look towards Steve, who was pretending not to listen. She looked over at him, narrowing her eyes. “But Steve wouldn’t do that. Because he knows that’s a fireable offense, right?”
Steve stuttered, trying to come up with the words. “Uh… yeah… right.”
“And as one of the leader’s, it’s my duty to write you up if I see you let fourteen year-olds rent an R-rated movie.” Steve looked down at the ground, avoiding her glare from being caught red-handed. Y/n let out a sigh. “I’m going to the backroom to get something. Since I can’t see the store or anything that happens while I’m in there, will you make sure any customers are taken care of while I’m gone?”
Steve looked up at her. He was unsure what to say. So, he just nodded.
Y/n eyed the three boys, giving them a small smile before walking to the back. She could hear them quietly celebrate as she entered the backroom. Of course, there was nothing for her to get or do in there. She was waiting until she heard the boys say bye, and ring of the bell, letting her know they were gone.
When she came back out, Steve’s back was leaned on the counter, arms crossed, watching the front door. The sunset streamed in, casting a glow on his tanned skin. She felt her cheeks heat up when she noticed the muscles in his arms poke out, his shirt sleeve hugging them. He noticed she had walked back into the room, standing straight, and brushing out his vest.
“Your friends left?” She pretended to look for them even though she knew the answer, walking towards the cash register. Her back now faced him.
Steve looked amused. “I wouldn’t really call them my friends.”
“They come in a lot to see you. That curly-haired boy seems to be fascinated with you.” She smirked at the thought that The King of high school who was popular was now only friends with a bunch of outcasts.
“Oh, yeah. I guess Dustin is like the little brother I never had.” He walked up next to her.
She shuddered when his arm brushed against hers. “That’s adorable,” Y/n cooed. She looked up at him with a big smile.
Steve blushed, but smiled back nevertheless. In doing so, it filled the air around the two of them with something that Y/n couldn’t describe. But it was suffocating, pricking her skin into tiny goosebumps along her arms.
He raked his fingers through his hair, sucking in his teeth. He was the first to break eye contact. “Listen, I um… wanted to talk to you about something Robin had said.”
Her face fell, unsure what he was going to say. “Oh?”
“Well, it’s kind of funny she would say such a thing. But a few weeks ago she mentioned something about you… having a crush on me.” He had thrown in some laughs as if it would ease the awkwardness.
Suddenly, it felt like Y/n had forgotten what words were. She was frozen, blinking rapidly, trying to tell her brain how to open her mouth. It would be easy for her to lie. To tell him, no, that’s absolutely ridiculous. Nevertheless, she looked up at him, a pathetic look in her eyes, opening her mouth to say something, but choosing to give a weak smile instead.
Realization hit him. Robin's intuition was correct. He couldn’t help but look at his feet, blushing. “Oh.”
The reply was all she needed to hear to know his thoughts on the matter. “It’s okay. You don’t have to say anything. I know you’re not interested. It’s just silly feelings that don’t mean anything, you know?” Her smile was small and sad. “I’d like to be your friend, though. I’ve just always been shy because you’re Steve Harrington and I wasn’t sure how to talk to you.”
Steve hated to admit her response was overwhelming and confusing. It was sure, he had never thought of her more than just a coworker. He gave a quick nod. “Right. Friends is… good. I’d like to be your friend as well.”
There was a beat.
“Great.” Y/n threw her hands up. “Then friends we are!” She patted him on the shoulder. And although her chest was tight, and a lump in her throat threatened to come up, she still smiled.
The bell ringing forced their attention towards the front door as another group of teenagers stormed in. The conversation was dropped for the rest of the night. And it probably would never come up again.
They were just friends.
***
Robin typed on the Family Video computer, occasionally leaning back, looking at the office door when she heard raised voices. Steve set some tapes on the counter next to her. She jumped, briefly looking at her friend before turning to look at the closed door again. “What do you think they’re talking about in there?”
Steve tilted his head, shrugging. “‘Dunno. Y/n and Keith have been butting heads for the past two weeks.”
“Yeah, but Mr. Morris never comes in. It must be something serious if the owner wanted to talk to them,” she whispered.
Before Steve could reply, the office door opened wide. “This is bullshit!” Y/n stormed out. She turned back around, pointing her finger towards whoever was in the room. “When this store goes downhill, don’t call me for help.” She pulled her work vest off and threw it on the ground. “I’m tired of doing all of Keith’s work and have no credit around here.”
There was no reply from inside the office, making her scoff in disbelief. “Fuck this place. And fuck you, Keith. Should I tell Mr. Morris now that you’ve been sneaking tapes from the adult section?” She turned back around and stomped past Robin and Steve, stopping for a moment to look at them, but it seemed like there was nothing else to say. She walked out of the store, leaving the pair dumbfounded.
Steve gave Robin a look. “I’ll be right back.” Before she could argue, Steve was running out of the store. He sighed in relief when he saw Y/n’s car still parked. He ran across the street, calling out her name, waving his hand in the air, barely missing a car coming his way. Whoever was driving was not happy because they held down their car horn as they passed by, flipping him off.
He didn’t bother with apologies. Instead, he walked up to her car, panting.
“Did your mother ever teach you how to look both ways, Harrington?” Although she was smirking, Steven took note of her puffy red-stained eyes. Dried tears clung to her soft cheeks. She must have noticed he was looking at her because she took the back of her hand to wipe her face.
“Are you okay?” He placed the palm of his hand on the top of her car, leaning on it slightly, trying to catch his breath. He needed to get back in shape.
Y/n, already frustrated, rolled her eyes. “I’m fine, Steve. I just want to go home.”
“Are you sure? It looked pretty rough back there.” He pressed.
Her jaw ticked. “Steve, I appreciate your concern. But I really don’t want to talk about it. Especially with you.”
Taken aback, Steve allowed his hand to slip down. He looked off to think for a moment. “I’m sorry. I just thought now that we’re friends… you might want someone to talk to.”
She bit her lip and pinched her nose. “No, I’m sorry. I’m pissed off and I took it out on you.” Her voice was soft, slightly cracking. Yet, she gave him an assuring smile. “Thank you for checking up on me.”
He smiled back. “Robin and I are having a movie night tomorrow. You should come. I have a heated pool.” He could sense she was unsure with the proposal. “And there will be booze. If you’re into that sort of thing of course.”
She sniggered, “Okay.”
That next night, Y/n showed up to Steve Harrington’s house just as she promised. She knocked on the large double doors. It took a moment before it opened. Her brows knitted together when the curly haired boy from Halloween answered the door. His name was Dustin, if she remembered correctly. “You’re not pizza.”
She dramatically patted herself. “Oh god. You’re right. I’m not. And you’re not Steve.”
Dustin rolled his eyes. “Very funny.” He left the door open just enough to let her in. “Steve! Your girlfriend is here.”
Her eyes went wide. “Oh, we’re not-”
“Y/n! You came.” Steve interrupted her, walking into the foyer.
She looked away quickly. He was only in a pair of swim trunks, a towel hung around the back of his neck. She had hoped he wasn’t serious about swimming. Even with a heated pool it was 53° outside. “Yeah, I had nothing better to do.”
Steve laughed, then looked over at Dustin who was still standing there, watching the two of them, clearly amused. “Henderson, what are you doing?”
“Waiting on the damn pizza you said you ordered an hour ago. I’m starving,” the younger boy complained.
“Stop whining and go upstairs and tell Robin Y/n’s here.” He motioned Dustin to go up the staircase that was right next to them. And like a mother, when Dustin opened his mouth to argue, Steve held a finger up. “Go, now.”
His shoulders dropped in defeat, doing as he was told.
Y/n giggled. “He seems like a handful.”
“No kidding.” Steve watched Dustin disappear at the top to go find Robin. “Just between you and me, I completely forgot to order the pizza.”
“I heard that!” Dustin yelled.
Steve ignored him, but rather put his hand on Y/n’s back so he could lead her through the house. “This is the living room.”
“I know.” Her eyes widened. “I didn’t mean that in a stalker way. I meant it as I’ve been to your parties in high school way.”
He chuckled, removing his hand from her back. “Sorry about that. I don’t remember much about high school. Mostly because part of me was so self-absorbed.”
There was a beat.
“Would you like a beer?”
“Uh… sure.” She followed him into the large kitchen. She had never seen it so empty, tracing her finger over the marble countertop. “I never thought you were self-absorbed.”
Steve paused for a moment to process what she had just said, looking over at her as she jumped on top of the counter. She seemed fascinated with his kitchen. He wasn’t sure why, though. It was just a kitchen. “I’m okay with admitting to being selfish and arrogant back then.”
Y/n took a cold can of beer out of his hand. She smirked, opening the can, letting it hiss. “I never said I never thought you were arrogant.” She took a sip.
Steve couldn’t help but titter. She had got him there he had to admit.
“Steve, Dustin said you forgot to order the pizza.” Robin’s voice infiltrated the kitchen as she barged through the door, clutching her stomach dramatically. “I’ve been studying non-stop and I think I’m about to die from lack of food.”
Y/n’s giggle made Robin look her up and down, examining from head to toe. She then turned back to Steve, a painful expression on her face. “Please order the pizza. My life is on your hands, Harrington.”
Steve rolled his eyes, taking the towel around his neck and swatting her with it. “You order it. I’m showing my guest around.”
“You never showed me around,” Robin mumbled. He tried to hit Robin again, but she caught the towel and pulled it away, frowning. “You do know me and Dustin will abuse this power of pizza ordering privileges.”
Steve looked like he was second-guessing his choice. Yet, he just sighed. “Yeah. Do as you wish. We’ll meet you guys outside in a bit.” He motioned for Y/n to follow him.
She slid off the counter, giving Robin a small smile. “See you in a bit.”
And before she turned to follow Steve out of the room, Robin’s mouth twisted into a sly smirk. She then crossed her arms and gave a suggestive wink at the girl. Y/n felt her face heat up and quickly put her head down, scurrying out of the room to catch up with Steve.
Later that night, Steve had walked Y/n to her car. When he walked back inside his house, he joined Robin and Dustin back in the living room. The two sat on the couch, arms crossed, and had knowing looks plastered on their faces, like mom’s who knew too much.
Steve ignored them and instead started to clean up the area. He had changed into a shirt and sweats, but his hair was still damp and clung to his forehead. Him and Dustin had been the only ones who swam. Robin and Y/n sat at the edge, their feet dipped into the pool, talking about who knows what.
Although Robin and Steve had a lot in common and were inseparable since the summer, he couldn’t help but feel happy she had another friend who was a girl. Truthfully, he struggled fully understanding her.
“Are you sure you two aren’t dating?” Dustin had been the one to break the ice, asking the question that Robin was wondering as well.
She sat silent, but by her expression, Steve could tell she had a lot to say on the matter. The Harrington boy sighed loudly, not looking over at them. “I’m sure.”
Robin let out a scoff, everything she had been holding in spilling out. “Are you kidding me? I’ve had to endure you two blatantly flirting or eye… canoodling for three weeks straight. But get this, he told me he turned her down when she told him she liked him.”
Dustin jumped off the couch, walking up to Steve.“Wait… dude, she likes you? And you rejected her? I thought it was weird when you and Robin haven’t gotten together yet, but this is even weirder.”
Steve glanced over at Robin, sharing a knowing look at one another. “Uh… yeah,” he coughed awkwardly. “She’s just not my type, you know.” Steve shook his head. This was unbelievable. Why was he talking about his love life with a kid? “Go get your stuff. Your mom should be home by now. I can’t believe I let her convince me to look after you tonight.”
Dustin mumbled profanities, walking off to go collect his things. Robin on the other hand had stood up, not wanting to drop the subject. “You’re a dingus, Harrington.”
“I’m done talking about it, Buckley. We’re just friends.” He took the handful of trash and walked into the kitchen to throw it away.
Robin followed. “Give me one good reason she isn’t your type. Then I’ll drop it.” Steve turned around, hands on hips, annoyed. Robin held out her pinkie. “I promise.”
He looked to the side and his jaw ticked. “I dunno, she just isn’t. There isn’t anything else to say.”
“You’re not helping your case-”
He cut her off by groaning loudly, putting his face in his hands. “Jesus Christ. I don’t like her because she doesn’t really like me. I can tell you’re confused. I meant that she doesn’t really like me because she likes this version of me she knew from high school.”
She still looked confused. “Okay?”
“Robin, you’ve seen my many failed dates. It has all been girls that I went to school with who had a crush on Steve “The King” Harrington. Once they learned that I was just some guy who had no actual plan for the future…” He couldn’t seem to finish the last part. He leaned back on the counter, arms crossed.
Robin started to laugh, receiving a dirty look from him. “But you always know that’s why those girls like you because of you were. Why is Y/n different? Is it because you like her too?”
Steve didn’t answer at first. He scratched his neck, standing up straight again. “She’s just a friend.”
Defeated in the argument, Robin sighed. “Right. Do you know why she quit yesterday?”
“What does this have to with-”
“She quit because Keith reported her for renting R-rated movies out to kids.”
Steve’s mouth fell open, unsure what to say.
But he didn’t have to say anything, because Robin continued, “She didn’t have to do that. She could have told the truth and saved her ass but she didn’t. Now sure, she might have a crush on you because of Steve “The King” Harrington. But something tells me she might be okay with Steve “The Lame and Dingus” Harrington.”
Steve couldn’t sleep the rest of the night once Robin and Dustin arrived safely back at their homes. He hated when Robin had the last word in their squabbles. And it seemed like this time it took the words right out from under him.
He was unsure how to feel. Grateful? Guilty? Indebted? None of those made up for what Y/n had done for him. And she didn’t even tell him. It was an unconditional favor that he wasn’t aware of until now.
***
Y/n hated to admit it, but she missed Family Video. Her days at the store were always different, even with the odd small-town regulars that came in. She hated that she even missed the smell of Keith’s tuna sandwich he always brought for lunch.
Now, she was stuck behind a desk taking calls for an attorney who rarely had clients. At first, she was ecstatic her first day had been sorting paperwork, but if she had known it would only take her a couple of hours, she would’ve dragged it out rather than trying to be a kiss-ass over achiever.
Unlike Family Video, her day was always the same. It was Hawkins, she expected to see odd cases come in and out, but most of the time it was the town drunks who violated their probation by drinking under the influence.
However, one good thing happened was at exactly 11:30 AM, Steve Harrinton would walk in with lunch. The first few days he had came, Y/n had already packed a sandwich for herself and it had gone to waste. She soon learned there wasn’t a need to pack her lunch at all by the second week.
Steve had managed to become the new lead, meaning he had full control of scheduling. Y/n was happy for him. He seemed to enjoy having more control and privileges. And she imagined he took advantage of his position whenever he was on a shift with Robin.
So, by now it had come to no surprise when he waltzed into the office, two bags in his hands, plopping in the chair on the other side. He always set his feet on top of the desk, which Y/n always pushed off. Even if she was occupied with a word search or book, it was an instinct.
“Working hard or hardly working?” He smiled, teeth and all, knowing she would cringe.
She let out raspberry, reaching over the desk and hand held out to take the bag. “What fine cuisine did you bring for me today? Wendy’s?”
Steve laughed, handing over the bag. “My mom’s meatloaf.”
She gave him a look. Nothing had to be said to know that it was strange coming from him having a home cooked meal from his mom. Especially since a few weeks ago he had mentioned his dad had received a promotion, meaning more time traveling. Steve had expressed many times that Mrs. Harrington didn’t trust his dad on his own.
She watched as he took out the contents of his bag. She had put the blinds up earlier because the sun was out even though it was December. Sunlight bled through, highlighting his dark hair that it almost looked like honey was oozing down his head like streaks.
However, the moment was ruined when he shoved a bologna sandwich in his mouth, crumbs falling everywhere.
“You always eat like it’s your last meal.” She noticed a drop of mustard on his chin. Sighing, she opened a drawer full of miscellaneous items, taking out a napkin. She leaned over the desk and wiped the mustard off his chin carefully. There was a beat where the two locked eyes, but she pulled away quickly, handing him the napkin.
“I eat like a working man who only has a 30-minute lunch break,” he complained.
She giggled. “I’ve told you my boss is looking for an intern. You’d get an hour.”
“Pfft. I am not cut out for the world of law. Although, my dad would probably be more than happy.” Steve ate the last bite of his food, rubbing his hands against one another to get the crumbs off.
She only smiled in response, finally taking a bite of the meatloaf, her eyes wide as it hit her tongue. “This is delicious!”
A laugh bellowed out of him. “Woah, slow down there.”
Y/n didn’t listen. In about five bites the meatloaf was all gone from the tupperware container. A loud burp escaped from her lips, she shockingly covered her mouth from embarrassment. But she quickly eased up when she saw the corner of his eyes crinkle.
She had noticed something different recently whenever she was around Steve. His touches always seemed to linger, or the sound of his laughter somehow stained the air around her. She wasn’t sure how that was possible, but even after he left the room she could still hear the rich sound waiting around, ringing throughout her ears. As if it wanted to taunt her. And not to mention his apparent need to always see her.
She had told herself weeks ago she was over him. He would never like her. They both verbally agreed that he only saw her as a friend and that was all they would be.
Steve coughed, attempting to break the silence. His expression made it seem like he had been trying to find the right words to say something. “So, did you see that Girls Just Want to Have Fun is showing at the drive-in on Saturday?”
She almost jumped in her seat. “Wait? Really? That’s my favorite movie!”
Steve smiled. He knew it was her favorite. Once he looked at her account and saw she had rented it a month straight once the store started to carry it. “Oh! I had no clue. Well, um…” He scratched his neck. “If you’re not busy do you want to go with me?”
“Yeah! I mean I’m not busy. I’d love to!” She grabbed her bag on the ground and dug around until she found her pocket calendar. “What time?”
Steve took a moment to relish her excitement, taking note how it made her eyes brighter. “Uh… seven.”
She nodded, scribbling down the plan on the calendar for Saturday. “That’s a perfect excuse to return Robin a book I borrowed from her.”
His face fell. “Robin?”
She didn’t seem to notice the shift. “This is so exciting!”
“Do you think I meant… Y/n I was kind of hoping… what I meant was that I wanted it to be just-”
Steve’s words were cut off as the front door opened. Y/n’s demeanor changed. Steve watched her closely as she sat up straighter, wiped her blazer of any crumbs, and looked at herself in the reflection of the computer in front of her.
He turned in his seat to see who had walked in that made her react in such a way.
It was a tall, clean, short haired man. “Hello, Y/n.” He was soft-spoken but somehow carried an assertive energy. Steve had to do a double take to realize it was Mike Lewinski. He was an old basketball teammate from school. And apparently over the summer he had had a makeover.
“Mike?” Steve stood up, allowing the third party to recognize his presence.
“Harrington? Wow, man. I thought it was only rumors that you stuck around.” He looked at the Family Video vest, before holding out his hand. “What brings you to my dad’s office?”
Steve was hesitant, but took it nonetheless, both their grips tight as if challenging one another silently. “Oh… I was just having lunch with Y/n.”
Mike looked over the girl who had also stood up in the meantime, smiling bashfully at him. “Y/n, I wasn’t aware you were seeing someone.”
She shook her head. “We’re not together!”
Steve turned around quickly from her eagerness to turn down the accusation. He faced Mike again. “Yeah, we have lunch sometimes whenever I’m not busy.”
“Ah.” Mike smiled. Almost like he was relieved. “Is my father in his office?”
Y/n stuttered. “Oh… yeah! You’re good. He doesn’t have any meetings today.”
He smiled and nodded. “Good to see you, Harrington. We should go out to the Hideaway sometime.”
“Yeah.”
Mike walked past him and towards his father’s office, stopping when he reached next to Y/n. She smiled nervously as he looked at her closely. “Did you cut your hair?”
Instinctively, she touched it, smiling. “Yes, I did.” She didn’t.
“I like it. It suits you.” Mike gave another curt nod, before walking into his father’s office.
Y/n giggled to herself, sitting back down in her chair.
Steve, on the other hand, couldn’t believe the monstrosity he had just witnessed. His jaw ticked the longer he thought about Meathead Mike and Y/n, in the words of Robin, eye canoodling. “You haven’t done anything with your hair.”
Y/n looked up, brows furrowed. “Huh?”
“He asked if you cut your hair and you said yes. You haven’t cut it. You just have it in a different style.” He pointed.
She scoffed. “So what? I was only being nice.”
“You were flirting,” he argued.
Y/n had had enough. She looked at the door behind her before jumping to her feet. She stormed around the desk, grabbing his wrist, and pulled him outside. “What the hell is with you?”
Steve pulled his arm away so he could cross them against his chest. And almost like a child, he looked away from her. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“You’re unbelievable.” She had to walk away for a moment to take a deep breath privately before returning. “You’ve been so strange lately. And now you’re upset because you think I was flirting with someone.”
“I’m not upset.”
“Right… fine. I’m not going to argue with you about it. I’m just having a hard time understanding you, Steve. I mean you go from not talking to me at all to coming to my work every day with lunch. Why?” In that moment, she hoped that secretly all this time had been his way of telling her he liked her.
It was promising because he had taken a step closer to her. His eyes drooped, vulnerable and harboring a secret he had been holding in.
When he saw her flirt with Mike, he realized that he had taken too long to decipher his feelings and thoughts about her. She had moved on and followed through with their mutual promise to be friends. He swallowed the thickness stuck in his throat, dropping his arms to his sides. “You’re right. I have been acting strange.”
Y/n’s heart skipped a beat.
“I have been feeling something for weeks and I wasn’t sure how to express it,” he continued.
The corners of her mouth lifted, stepping closer to him, grabbing his hand. “Steve, it’s okay. You can tell me.”
He looked down, ashamed. “I’ve felt guilty about you quitting because of me.” His voice was soft but almost ear-deafening at the same time.
She closed her eyes to process what he had said. “You… you’ve been bringing me lunch every day because you felt guilty about me quitting?”
Steve nodded. “You took the fall for me and then I ended up with your job. I feel like an asshole.”
Y/n bit her lip, letting go of his hand. However, she smiled reassuringly. “I’m going to kill Robin for telling you.”
“Please don’t. Her ghost will come back and kill me.”
They shared a laugh.
Steve looked through the window at the closed office door. “Mike’s a good guy.”
“Yeah. I know.” She smiled sadly, looking at her watch. “Your break is over.”
Steve took a deep breath. “Right. You know, about Saturday. I completely forgot that I have to pull a double so I don’t think I’ll be able to go.” He put his hand on top of his head, pretending as if it had just come to him.
She tried not to look upset. “It’s okay. I forgot I have to babysit.” It was a lie. And maybe deep down he knew it, but he didn’t show any reaction.
Instead, he left her with a half-hearted smile and dirty tupperware that he forgot to take with him. She had taken it home and washed it so it would be returned cleaned. But the rest of the week, Steve didn’t show up at his regular time. Anytime she called the store and asked for him, someone always gave the excuse that he was busy. By Friday, Y/n had packed her own lunch for the first time in weeks.
***
Robin Buckley had never been a flashy person. She hated the attention on her. And she only said things to strangers if she absolutely had to.
So when her, Steve and Y/n were at the diner and she brought up wanting to have an eighteenth birthday party, Steve was taken aback. Y/n on the other hand, squealed. “Oh my god! That will be so much fun. Don’t you agree, Steve?” They had only recently started to be okay again. But there were still moments when the energy between them was tense.
He didn’t look at her. “Yeah, I guess.”
Y/n hit his shoulder. “This is Robin’s only eighteenth birthday. Of course she’d want to have a huge party.”
“I never said anything about it being huge,” Robin interjected.
Y/n waved her hand as if she was waving off what her friend had just said. “Leave the planning to me. Steve can we have it at your-”
“Whatever.” He glanced at his watch, getting out of the booth. “I have to go pick up Dustin and his geek squad.” He finally looked at Y/n as he laid some cash to cover his bill on the table. “Robin can tell me more at work tomorrow.”
Once he left, she let out a huff. “He has some nerve.”
Robin waited a moment before replying. “He’s been pissy lately because Dustin has been hanging out with Eddie Munson more than him.”
“He’s so moody,” she complained.
Robin only hummed.
The party was more than what Robin had imagined. People she had never spoken to filled the empty spaces of the Harrington household. They had no clue who she was, but it didn’t matter because there was free alcohol and they were all too drunk to ask.
Robin stood next to Y/n, shyly saying thanks to all the people who wished her a happy birthday. She took a sip from her cup, cringing at the taste. Y/n chuckled, leaning over to Robin, grabbing her arm for support. “No one’s forcing you to drink that.”
Robin, as if proving a point, chugged the rest, wiping her mouth. “It’s my birthday. Once I get drunk enough, it will taste like water.”
They shared a fit of drunken giggles. Y/n looked across the room to see Steve leaned against the wall, a red-solo cup in his hand, talking to a blonde. She felt her stomach twist and the only remedy was the rum punch in her hand. “I need to get laid.”
“W-what about that one guy…” Robin snapped her fingers trying to recall the name. “Meathead!”
“Meathead?” She thought for a moment. “You mean Mike?” Mike Lewinski had asked her out for coffee a few weeks ago. Nothing had gone wrong, in fact he was nice, but their conversations fell flat and uninteresting. Both of them had agreed there would be no future dates.
“Ah, right. His name was Mike. I was thinking about what Steve had called him the other day.” She frowned when she looked inside her empty cup. Unsure where it all had gone. “I need more to drink.”
The two girls walked through the crowd to get to the kitchen. “Why were you and Steve talking about me and Mike?”
Robin’s shoulders tensed, glancing back to look at her. “Oh… uh… we weren’t.”
Y/n could read through the blatant lie. She finished her drink rather than calling out Robin. She chose to drink a beer next, taking one out of the ice chest at the end of the island. She asked if Robin wanted one, but the girl didn’t reply.
She looked up to see her staring across the room. Following her gaze, Y/n’s eyes landed on a tall thin girl. Her hair was fiery red and curly. Freckles scattered on her face as if a painter had flicked their brush. She noticed Robin was looking at her. She smiled sweetly and gave her a tiny wave before returning to her conversation.
Robin had raised her hand, blushing profusely. The dots seemed to connect for Y/n. “You know, you should go talk to her.”
Robin snapped around, eyes huge, like she had been caught red-handed. “I- wasn’t…” She let out an exasperated sigh. “Her name’s Vickie. She’s in band with me.”
“She’s cute. I honestly didn’t expect that from you.”
“Well, most people don’t expect me to be a lesbian.”
Y/n giggled. “No, I meant I didn’t expect you to be into red-heads.”
She wasn’t sure how many drinks she had had in her system by the time she needed to use the bathroom. The air had turned stale from the sweaty bodies that polluted the house. It didn’t help that people came back inside after smoking cigarettes or weed, the stench still clinging onto their clothes.
The only bathroom that was open to guests was downstairs. The line wasn’t long, but it seemed to drag the longer she waited and the more she needed to use it. She leaned her body against the wall next to her, letting the chilled surface cool her hot cheeks.
She stood straight when Steve stumbled through the hallway. At first he didn’t notice her until she slurred his name. He stopped, and chuckled at her state. “Why are you by yourself?”
Y/n reached out and drunkenly grabbed his hand, pulling him closer. He didn’t fight it. In fact, he took his other hand and put it on top, his thumb rubbing hers. She went to her tip toes so she put her mouth close to his ear. “Robin is flirting with girls.”
Steve’s expression seemed panicked. “How’d you…?”
“Stevie, I’m a genius. I was bound to find out someday.” She giggled as if she had said the funniest thing in the world. “I let her flirt so I could wait in like to piss. I have to piss so bad.”
Steve looked at the line in front of her, sighing. “Come on.” He wrapped his arm around her. Maybe to support her. Or maybe just an excuse to touch her. He led her away from the bathroom and towards the staircase.
As they ascended, many people gave them strange looks. And some were jealous, thinking that Steve Harrington had found the girl he would spend the night with.
Y/n had known Steve as a close friend for months, and even had come over more than she could count on two hands, but she had never been inside his room. It was neat and smelled like mahogany and his cologne.
He let go of her, pointing towards another door. “Uh… there’s my bathroom.”
She smiled, thanking him before going inside. It was fairly large. A long counter with products scattered on the top. He had one of those walk in showers with glass doors.
She looked behind her just to be sure before sneaking over, picking up a nearly empty bottle of shampoo, opening and taking a sniff. Yep, it smelled exactly like him. Sweet but also like the outdoors during winter.
When she finished and walked back outside, Steve was laying on his bed, legs dangled over the side, eyes closed. She let out a breath that resembled a laugh. She walked over to him, sitting on the side and looked down.
A stray hair had fallen to his forehead. She couldn’t help but reach out and use her pointer finger to brush it back. She jumped when his eyes snapped open. “I didn’t mean to disturb you.”
He groaned, sitting up. He looked bad. Not because he had drunk a lot but also because he looked as if he hadn’t slept well lately.
“We should get back to the party,” Y/n suggested.
“No.” He had said it quickly, like a snap. It wasn’t meant to be harsh, but he realized how rash he sounded. “Sorry. I had meant I wanted to stay here for a bit. But you can go.”
She bit her lip. Surely he didn’t think she was going to leave him by himself. Instead of words, she grabbed his hand. Silently saying she would stay.
A few minutes passed by of the two of them sitting in the dark room, listening to voices from outside. The moon casted a milky light through his window, making shadows dance on the wall in front of them. Y/n nudged Steve, laughing. “Am I super drunk, or does that shadow on the wall look like a dick?”
Steve narrowed his eyes, trying to see what she was looking at. His shoulder brushed against hers as he joined in her laughter. “Yeah. It really does.”
“It compliments the room well,” she joked.
He pushed his body into her side softly. “I’ll think about it next time we redecorate the house. I think my mom will be ecstatic.”
There was a beat where they laughed harder, looking at one another. She had taken her hand away from him to cover her mouth. He had taken his hands and covered his face. Y/n took note how they were large enough to hide all of his features.
The laughter subdued gradually, both of them putting their hands back into their laps as they calmed down. Y/n sighed to fill in the silence. “I’m going to go find Robin. She’s probably looking for me. Do you want to come with me?”
“I think I’m going to stay here for a few more minutes. You know, so no one gets the wrong idea.” He smirked.
She scoffed. “I think they already had the wrong idea when you brought me up here.” She smiled. “Thank you, by the way. I probably would’ve pissed my pants if it weren’t for you.”
He rolled his eyes. “Don’t be dramatic.”
She pushed him slightly. “Asshole.” The pair locked eyes, making her stomach flip. “Seriously, thank you.” She slowly leaned in, hesitant, placing a tender kiss on his cheek.
She pulled away to get up, but Steve’s hand flew to her wrist, forcing her to stay. She was shocked, a small gasp escaped her. Even though they were already looking at one another, he seemed to be searching for something in her eyes. His Adam’s apple bobbed as his thumb swiped her cheek. “You had an eyelash,” he mumbled.
“Oh.” The back of her neck started to feel warm. “Was that all?”
“You’re so pretty.”
And it was like all the energy at the top of the rollercoaster that seemed to build over the months had finally reached the top, falling. Their lips connected. And it was more than Y/n had expected as they moved like static rubbing together, electrifying from her lips to her toes.
When she moaned, Steve took the opportunity to kiss her open-mouthed, drinking in the sound that followed. His hand gripped her hip, pulling her closer. It had to be all a dream. She needed to tangle her fingers in his hair unless he would slip away.
This wasn’t the first time she had touched his hair. Sometimes she would ruffle it when he was irritating her, or when they hung out he would lay his head on lap as she brushed her fingers through. But this time was different. It felt dirty.
He was the first to break away, his chest heaving, lips swollen, and eyes darkened. He shuddered when she went straight for his jaw, leaving a trail of kisses to his ear, slightly grazing her teeth on the lobe.
“Babe, I’m going to cum if you do that again.” He moved his head so he could place another kiss on her lips, then on her neck.
“Say that again,” she whispered.
“What?” He kissed and sucked on a spot that made her gasp his name. “Do you want me to call you babe? Was that it?”
“Yes, please.” She dug her nails into his shoulders, clenching her eyes when his hand slipped under her shirt.
“You have no idea how worked up you have me, babe.”
She placed a hand on his thigh, feeling the bulge through the denim of his jeans. She gave him a smug expression. “I think I have an idea.” She swung her leg over his so she could straddle him. Thankful for the skirt she had chosen to wear when it rode up her thigh slightly. She bucked her hips so that she could feel him twitch through the thin fabric of her underwear.
The kisses became sloppier and more heated as they continued to roam their hands all over one another.
Both their shirts ended up on the floor eventually. Followed by Y/n’s bra. His belt had been unbuckled to relieve him of the pressure.
With his mouth, he peppered kisses on her breasts, putting one in his mouth as he kneaded the other with his free hand. When he broke away, a string of saliva formed from her nipple to his lips.
He looked up at her, and he looked destroyed.
It had been everything she had dreamed. So why did she feel tears brim her eyes? She gave him a fierce kiss again, but it somehow felt… wrong. “I…” Her bottom lip quivered.
“Yes?” He tried to kiss her neck again, but she stopped him.
“I forgot about the cake!” She jumped off his lap, grabbing her bra and shirt, turning away from him to put them back on.
“Cake?” He seemed confused, pinching his nose.
“Yeah. Robin’s birthday cake. I completely forgot.” She hit her forehead with the palm of her hand. “Silly me.”
“Oh. Uh… yeah.” Steve’s disappointment was clear.
“Good thing I remembered. Or else we would’ve made a huge mistake.” She laughed awkwardly.
Steve stood up as well to put his shirt back on. “Mistake?”
Y/n turned back around once she was decent again. “Oh come on. We’re both very drunk. You know this wouldn’t have happened any other way.”
Steve let out a huff, running his hands through his already messy hair. His jaw ticked, refraining from saying anything else. No longer aroused, he buckled his belt and stormed past her out of his room.
It was three in the morning when Steve kicked out the last guest. Y/n and Robin were the only ones left, cleaning up all the trash around the house. Steve walked into the living room where they were giggling. And almost immediately, the energy shifted. They fell silent as he stood there, hands on his hips.
“I’m going to take a shower and go to bed. I made sure the guest room is ready.” He didn’t allow a response before he turned on his heels and left the room.
Robin waited until she heard his door shut from upstairs before opening her mouth. “Jeez. What’s his deal?”
“Who knows?” Y/n shoved a handful of trash into a bag, a bit too aggressively.
Robin eyed her for a moment, rolling her eyes. “Jesus, you two hooked up, didn’t you?”
She almost dropped what she was holding. Nevertheless, she tried to pretend not to react. “Not sure what you mean by that.”
“Oh come on. You both disappeared for an unnatural amount of time and both came back looking like a hot mess. Also your shirt has been on backwards.” Robin smirked. She was smug and had been waiting for the perfect chance to finally say her deductions out loud.
Y/n looked down, and sure enough her shirt had been backwards the whole time. Robin probably had noticed right away. Cheeky. “We didn’t hook up. We only…” She couldn’t find the right words.
“Canoodled?” Robin wiggled her brows.
Y/n threw an empty cup at her, and although she was embarrassed, she felt a laugh come up. “You’re sick, you know that?”
The brunette shrugged. “You’re sick for hooking up with our friend on my birthday.”
“Your birthday isn’t until Monday.”
Robin pointed at her. “That’s a technicality.”
She rolled her eyes, looking up at the ceiling, trying to imagine what Steve was doing. “I think I hurt his feelings.”
Robin sighed, making Y/n wonder about their conversation earlier in the night when her and Steve had talked about Y/n and Mike. Had Robin been in-between the whole time? “He’ll get over it.”
She frowned and shook her head. “No, this time it was different. I said it was a mistake.”
Her friend looked up to the sky, mouthing the words “Just kill me now.” She let a beat go by. “You two are ridiculous. It’s like cat and mouse with feelings. First you think he doesn’t like you, then he doesn’t think you like him, and then you do whatever the hell you did tonight and you still think he doesn’t like you. Everyone in a two-mile radius can tell you like one another. Hell, people in Illinois can tell. Should we tattoo it on both your foreheads? ‘I have a big fat crush on Dingus one’ and ‘I have a big fat crush on Dingus two’?”
“Thanks, Robin. You know how to cheer a girl up.” Y/n’s mouth drooled with sarcasm.
“I’d die for the two of you, but I can only take so much.” She clutched her heart dramatically.
Y/n didn’t answer, ashamed, a sheepish expression painted on her face. And it all felt obvious what she needed to do and say. She could go upstairs right now and make everything okay between her and Steve. But, she was too stubborn and instead planned on forgetting what had happened that night.
***
Trying to forget what had happened only lasted a week before she waltzed into Family Video on her break the next Friday. Steve was behind the counter helping the same blonde from Robin’s birthday party. She had giggled at something Steve had said, reaching out and straightening his vest.
He looked over at the door, his face fell at the sight of his new customer. He turned his attention back to the blonde, and Y/n could hear him say, “Have a good day.” The girl looked disappointed when she had turned around, leaving the store. It was only the two of them. But why did it feel like there was so much noise going on?
Steve watched her stand there for a few seconds until he decided to act busy. LIke she was another customer.
She sighed and came up to the counter. “H-hi.”
Steve turned his back to her. “Hello, welcome to Family Video. How can I assist you?”
“Steve.” She was exasperated and wanted to get straight to the point.
He turned around, pretending to be shocked. “Oh! Y/n, didn’t realize it was you.” He looked at his watch. “Robin doesn’t work today. There’s a basketball game.”
“I know. I came to see you.” She lifted a paper sack in her hand, placing it on the counter. He had moved his head slightly, allowing her to catch the fading bruise on his neck. Her cheeks burned when she realized what it was. “I- I brought you lunch.”
Suddenly, she felt like she was back in that classroom when he had asked for a pencil. The months of getting comfortable around him had vanished, and all words were stuck on her tongue, unable to escape. “I already ate lunch.”
He was lying and she knew he was. He turned back around, ignoring her again. She felt the anger rise, she violently grabbed the sack, throwing it loudly in the trash can by the door. Just as she was about to leave, her hand on the handle, she took a deep breath. “I know I hurt your feelings, but that gives you no right to be mean to me.” She turned around.
He was no longer messing with anything but he still faced the opposite way. She chose to continue, “I came here to make things okay. To tell you I’m sorry.”
“Sorry for what you said or sorry for kissing me?”
She groaned in frustration, putting her palms on her temples, rubbing them. She didn’t want to lose her cool, but he was making it painfully hard. “Of course I’m not sorry for kissing you-”
He snapped around. “But you still think it was a mistake, right?”
She opened her mouth but quickly closed it, clenching her jaw. A tear betrayed her, rolling down her cheek. “Do you know why I first started to like you?”
He folded his arms across his chest, motioning for her to continue.
“I liked you because the first thing I learned was that you cared about others before yourself. It might sound silly, because it is, but when I was five years old, you kissed me after making me cry. This entire time I had just thought I liked you in school because you were Steve Harrington. You were cute and I couldn’t help but feel butterflies when you asked me for a pencil in seventh grade because there was a sparkle that shone in your stupid brown eyes. But I also thought that’s all it was, a school crush that I wouldn’t even remember in twenty years.
“But then you had to get a job here and make me realize how that guy in school wasn’t as selfish as everyone made him out to be. I saw it every time you made sure to be at the counter when Mrs. Higgins came in because you know she doesn’t like me. I saw it every time Dustin came around and you made sure he wasn’t in trouble. I saw it every time you came to my work and brought me lunch when I never asked you to.” She wiped the flood pouring down her face, trying to keep it together.
Steve’s face had fallen but he continued to stand there frozen.
She let out a sob, her lip quivered, looking at the ground so he couldn’t see her puffy eyes. “No, I don’t think kissing you was a mistake. I was only afraid because although the more I got close to you, and the more I liked you, the more I considered you a friend. And it felt like we were just hooking up. So it felt wrong.” She looked up at him, sniffling. “I’m sorry.” She gave him a half-hearted smile and left the store.
She began her walk back to the office, which wasn’t that far from the store. She had only gotten a few feet away when she heard the bell hastily ring, and hurried footsteps pounded against the pavement behind her. “Wait! Y/n!”
She wiped more tears on her sleeve, pushing back the lump in her throat when she turned around. His hair was disheveled and eyes red. “You didn’t give me a chance to talk.” His voice was softer than earlier. More careful, trying not to upset her. He brushed his thumb over her cheek. “I made you cry again.”
“I-it’s okay,” she mumbled.
“No, it’s not. I let my pride get in the way.” He licked his lips. “You were wrong.”
“What?” She was unsure what he meant.
Hesitant, he took her hand in his, looking at it and then back up at her. “What happened wasn’t a hook-up to me. I had been trying to ask you out for weeks but I thought you might have moved on. And when we were in my room at the party I couldn’t help but notice the moon made you glow. You looked beautiful, and I couldn’t help but finally kiss you.” He let out an awkward chuckle. “I definitely got carried away.”
She smiled shyly. “You tried to ask me out?” She gasped, eyes wide, and covered her face. “Oh my god. That’s why you asked to go to the drive-in. You wanted it to be a date.”
He laughed at her reaction, nodding. “Don’t worry. I was a little rusty. You make me nervous.”
She smirked, poking him in the chest. “What? I make Steve Harrington nervous?”
He rolled his eyes, but grinned cheekily nonetheless. “Can you blame me? I did just admit how pretty I think you are.”
There was a beat as they locked eyes. He reached out and put his hand on the side of her face, stepping closer, parting his lips as his face neared hers.
However, she stopped him. She raised her brows and let a smug smile appear. “You’re going to kiss me even though you haven’t asked me on a date yet?”
Flabbergasted, Steve laughed in disbelief. “Seriously?”
She took a step back and crossed her arms. Mimicking what he did to her earlier.
He sighed and stood up straight. He then cleared his throat dramatically. “Y/n, would you do me the honor of accompanying me to a nice dinner tomorrow night?”
She gave him a toothy smile, giggling. “I’d be very delighted.”
“Pick you up at seven?” He asked.
She nodded. “Perfect.”
“Okay, then I guess I’ll see you then.” Steve took her hand, placing a soft kiss. He gave her a sweet goodbye before he turned around to go back to the store which probably had been left unoccupied for too long.
She looked at her watch, seeing that she still had fifteen minutes left of her break. Smiling to herself, she chased after Steve, tapping him on the shoulder before he reached the door. He turned around, brows furrowed, probably wondering if she had forgotten something.
She grabbed him by the vest, pulling him towards her, their lips crashed against one another. He was shocked at first. However, he melted when her lips started to push and pull against his. His hand wrapped around to the small of her back, the other on the back of her neck, pulling her closer.
And they both felt like they were floating in the air. To her, it was like that random Tuesday in December, where her stomach fluttered and her heart pounded against her chest. It felt surreal. It was more than she had imagined.
#blaize writes#steve harrington x reader smut#steve harrington imagine#steve harrington smut#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington#stranger things imagine#stranger things fanfic#stranger things fanfiction#stranger things smut#stranger things#steve harrington x you#steve harrington x you smut#steve harrington fluff#steve harrington angst#steve fic
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Here’s a link to a blog post on my personal website on a topic that I think is very important.
I’ve also put it below the read more for people that don’t like external links. But if you're okay with it, checking it out on my personal website is really nice (and even giving it a heart if you can)! I don't make money from my website, so there are no intrusive ads or anything like that to stop you from reading the article.
Embracing Your Inner Child
This applies to anyone, but I really want to emphasize this to my fellow survivors who went through trauma as children and/or teenagers.
I’m so sorry you lost part, most or all of your childhood. That doesn’t mean it’s too late to give your inner child what you can. This includes comfort but it also includes doing the things you didn’t get to if you can.
Play the fun games. Buy the tasty treats. Go on adventures.
It’s never too late to feel a little more of the kind of joy you had (or should have had) as a child. You may not be able to be a child again, but you can still help and support your inner child.
You might have been told that a fun idea you had was “silly” or even “stupid.” When you have those thoughts now, instead of rejecting it, embrace the “silly” idea and let yourself enjoy it. It’s not shameful or wrong to do the things your inner child wants to do. It’s okay to be “immature” sometimes, even if you’re twenty years old. Or thirty. Or sixty. I just want to say that I don’t think any of this is immature, but I know that is a bias and judgement a lot of us might pass on ourselves.
A short, not at all complete list of things you might do for your inner child:
Watch childhood movies or tv shows (Did you watch “Blues Clues”, or “Pokemon”? Maybe “The Land Before Time”? There’s no reason you can’t still enjoy them.)
Listen to “silly” music, maybe singing along or dancing to it (for me, one favourite is “I Just Can’t Wait To Be King” from The Lion King. I know every word and have a dance party everytime it comes on my shuffle.)
Go to the park and use the swings (I don’t know why, but flying up just a few feet can make me forget all my “grown-up” worries)
Have a treat just because (maybe that big sundae your parents never let you have, or the chicken nuggets you haven’t had in a decade). Maybe you want to fulfil your childhood dream of having ice cream for breakfast!
Go to the toy store - maybe even get some stuffed animals or other toy items. (I just recently realized that I can fulfill my childhood dream of collecting certain toys that I never got to have when I was younger!)
Ride a roller coaster and scream your head off on the way down (I like to try to be in the very first car)
Make creative, crafty stuff - like a painting or drawing, or decorating a picture on construction paper with googly eyes and glitter or a clay model with a weirdly shaped head (even if the result looks like something you’d expect to see in a kindergarten class, or the process makes a mess that looks like a glitter bomb went off)
Another aspect of embracing your inner child is trying to give your inner child the person you needed when you were a child.
This might mean standing up for yourself when others try to put you down or take credit for things you’ve done, even (or especially) if no one else spoke up for you when you were a child.
It might mean offering comfort and compassion to yourself, and not being too hard on yourself when you make mistakes that you would have been insulted for as a child or don’t know something that “everyone learns as a child.” Maybe now you can teach yourself that accidents happen, and spilling a drink or breaking a plate is not the disaster and failure of character that you were told as a child.
It might mean being patient with yourself when something is harder to do than you feel like it should be (whether you actually aren’t able to do it as easily as others, or you have unrealistic expectations of its difficulty because of the expectations put on you as a child). There are lots of instructional videos out there to help you to gain basic cooking or cleaning skills. If you never really learned to read, there are programs to help you. If you weren’t allowed or able to learn to manage your emotions or relationships in healthy ways, there’s help out there for you. There is absolutely no shame in not learning any kind of skills you feel you “should” have learned as a child, and it is okay to learn them as an adult.
You may have had to grow up too fast. You may not have been allowed to do the fun things. You may have suffered trauma that shattered your childhood. I’m here to tell you that you still have an inner child, and embracing that inner child is good for you. Just because you’re an adult, at any age, doesn’t mean that you’re too old to have fun.
No one else gets to decide what’s right for you - you get to decide what you enjoy and what you want.
And it’s never too late to remember, indulge, listen to, and embrace your inner child. Let them be a part of how you choose to move forward. It’s time for us to realize that there is no one way to be an adult, and we get to decide what being an adult means to us. And if that means I want to rent a bouncy castle for my birthday, then that is my perfectly valid version of an adult birthday (a birthday which my inner child would be thrilled about, by the way).
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Moreee dad!lance pleaseeee
"Daddy! Daddy! Again!" His twins yelled as he smiles pushing them on the swings in their backyard. It was summer break, and he was finally home and able to enjoy the family time he could.
Yu were inside currently fixing lunch for the kids and you two. The sound of their laughter and Lance's chuckle is music to your ears. Each time you look up he's smiling. And after such a hard season deserves to smile like this.
"Noah! Harper lunch!" You yell out the open window. At 4 years old the twins were a perfect blend of you and Lance, but their eyes were all Lance and you loved seeing that. Lance helps them off the swings and starts chasing them inside.
Their screams fill the peaceful house, which turn into giggles when he scoops them up. "Ughhh, why are my babies getting so big?" Lance groans, acting like the twins were boulders. "Daddy! We're not heavy!' Noah whines which have Harper glaring at her father.
"Alright, alright. You're not heavy, still my little ones." Lance whispers, kissing each of their cheeks and you place their chicken nuggets and mac and cheese before them. Lance moves, pulling you close, and he kisses you gently. "Hey," He whispers placing another kiss on your lips.
"Hey," You sigh, melting into his hold which makes him smile. "I've missed you, all three of you." Lance wanted you 3 to come to more races but he understood that upheaving the twins so often wasn't the best so when he was able to, coming home was the best thing.
"I know, Lance. But maybe when they're older we can watch you more." The two of you start to sway almost dancing as he moves back to the kitchen with you in arms. "Harper is started to get protective of Noah," Lance mummers watching as Harper cuts Noah's nuggets in half for him. "Thank you, Harpy." Harper smiles patting her brother's head and goes back to eating.
Lance smiles at them, his heart filling with so much love. "Reminds me of us," You whisper. Lance hums as he knew you were protective of him, always having his back no matter what. "They do, but they're better protected now." Lance whispers.
"That they are," "Daddyyyy, Noah made a mess." Lance groans dropping head as he turns seeing Noah's wobbly lip and apple juice all over him and the table. "Thank you, Harper, Noah love let's go take a bath." Noah whines, holding his arms up as Lance picks him right up. "Daddy, can we play cars?" Smiling you clean up the mess, glad to have your little family back together
#f1#formula 1#f1 fandom#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 x y/n#formula one#f1 scenario#f1 fluff#dad!lance#dad!f1#f1 oneshot#f1 blurb#lance stroll x reader#lance stroll imagine#lance stroll fluff#lance stroll oneshot#lance stroll x you#lance stroll x y/n#lance stroll headcannon
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Chicken Shop Date | Part 7 |
By @imagine-that-100 and @alovesreading
Description: Matty Healy x Reader (Female) | You and your best friend Amelia came up with a very simple idea of taking celebrities on awkward chicken shop dates, and somehow, it’s managed to become both of your jobs. In the past, you’ve found sitting across from some of the biggest stars on the planet and eating chicken nuggets easy. But then Amelia manages to score you a date with the man who you’ve been obsessed with since you were nineteen; Matty Healy.
Word Count: 36.9k
A/N: Bestiesssss, we’re back with a monster of a chapter. Hope you’re ready for smut, angst, and fluff. This brings it allllllllll! Honestly can’t wait to see what you all think of this one, please give us all of your reactions as we love to see it and it keeps us motivated to write. We have a little cameo in this chapter, she was already going to be in it before anything happened irl so yeah, funny how things turn out hahaha. Thank you for being patient and sticking with us, we really hope you enjoy! x
| Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 |
| N’s Masterlist | A’s Masterlist |
~*~*~*~ January 1st 2023 ~*~*~*~
Waking up in his arms feels like something out of a dream.
You feel warm inside and out, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips feeling his slow breaths hitting the back of your neck. You faintly remember coming back to his and the concrete walls surrounding you confirm that your hazy memory isn’t betraying you.
The light peeking through the windows burns harshly even through your closed eyes but it isn’t enough to bother you when you’re in such bliss to be waking up next to Matty. Or rather, in front of him, since he’s got his chest pressed against your back with an arm wrapped around your waist which has you flush against him.
A hum of content falls from your lips as you relish and shuffle impossibly closer to him, your movement making him stir in his sleep and open his eyes a few seconds later.
Matty smiles seeing the back of your head the second he opens his eyes, nuzzling his face on the back of your neck and pressing soft kisses on your skin to let you know he’s awake.
A string of giggles leaves you when feeling his curls tickling your neck and his plush lips on your skin causing an eruption of butterflies in your belly.
“Good morning baby,” Matty greets with a smile on his face, one that you can feel in the crook of your neck where he finds a place to hide and continues to drop kisses.
His raspy morning voice makes something inside you shift, and combined with the feeling of his fingers clutching you tighter, you start letting thoughts run around your head that you know you shouldn’t be having this early in the morning.
It gets worse when his fingers let go of your waist and start to wander, at the same time as his mouth lazily leaves a trail of kisses down to your shoulders. You feel his fingertips tracing to the side of your stomach and lowering until it reaches your hip, the smile on your face growing when the faint touch seems to electrify your body awake.
And then his mouth goes retracing its path from your shoulders up your neck whilst his fingers teasingly ghost from your hip to the middle of your belly, falling down until it reaches your lower stomach and your breath hitches in your throat rather loudly in the silence you’ve fallen inside his room.
Still hiding on your neck, you can feel him smirking, not to mention his hot and heavy breath getting closer to your ear where he whispers, “How are you feeling?” as if he doesn’t already know the answer.
Humming, you let yourself get lost in his presence. The pads of his fingers rubbing circles on your lower stomach which have your body reacting at the growing desperation of feeling him everywhere else. Like the rest of your skin is jealous he’s concentrating solely on that spot.
“Good,” You eventually reply, but knowing that if you need anything, and that he’ll most likely give it to you if you ask. So you add, “A bit horny though.”
Matty chuckles into your neck. A bit, an understatement. He had felt your hips writhe just before he had asked you, his dick twitching in his Calvins at your noticeable response to him.
“Right,” He hums and starts pressing his lips on your neck again, only this time they are more wet and open mouthed kisses than just simple pecks, “Only a bit?”
You nod, biting your bottom lip to not make any sound when you feel him start sucking on a certain spot in your neck which he had taken a mental note yesterday that you enjoyed.
He grows more intently at bruising your neck in that spot in particular, making you take a deep breath so you don’t give into making noises just yet. But he knows exactly what you’re doing so in a swift movement, he gets a hold of your leg and lifts it up enough for him to fit one of his legs in between yours, pushing his hips forwards so you feel him growing harder. And he can’t help but silently congratulate himself when you finally let out a gasp that turns into a mewl that satisfies him for a few seconds.
Matty’s fingers have a grip on the plush flesh of your inner thigh, the pressure is delicious combined with the rolling of your hips as you’re both looking to keep the friction going, and his mouth continuing its attack on the skin of your neck has your eyes rolling back in pleasure.
You’re about to complain when his fingers let go of your leg, letting it fall over his leg in between yours, but then you feel the running up your inner thigh until it grazes the edge of your underwear. You just can’t help but let out a high pitched moan which is pleading for him to touch you right where you need him.
It’s lucky Matty has grown to read your mind, your sounds, your body language, because he gives you just what you want by pushing the fabric of your underwear aside and runs his fingers up and down your slick.
“F-fuck,” You let out a strangled curse at the slight pressure he applies when he finds your clit, his fingers moving agile and easily since you’re already wet for him.
Feeling him growing harder, pressed against your arse makes you even more turned on, and the groan he lets out in your ear goes straight down to your core too.
After biting your earlobe, he teases you further by asking, “What do you need, baby?” as if your throbbing cunt wasn’t clearly clenching around nothing.
“Your fingers.” You answer breathlessly, half lidded eyes from the pleasure he was giving you.
You hear him hum, pleased with your answer before his fingers curl to go inside you. Easily getting two in, knuckles deep, to stretch you out heavenly.
The noise of his fingers pumping in and out of you mixed with your breathless moans and gasps and his groans made for a pornographic scene but after a minute, you need more of him. You can feel his hips bucking into your arse in search of relief and the tease of his dick pressed against you was driving you insane.
So in between your ragged breaths, you let him know, “Baby- I need you. Need you to fuck me.”
The request unravels something inside him, a guttural groan leaving his throat and his fingers leaving you in a haste.
You whine at the loss of him, but your noise is hushed by his fingers coming up to your mouth for you to suck clean. You do as you’re silently instructed, Matty watching you over your shoulder as you sink your mouth onto his slick wet fingers with his mouth falling agape. You make a show of how much you enjoy tasting yourself on his fingers, which ends up with him using his other hand to grab a fistful of your hair and pull on it so your head is thrown back at an angle good enough for his lips to crash against yours.
You swallow a loud moan that falls from his lips when your tongues meet and he tastes you on your tongue, his hand tracing down your front, pulling his borrowed top up exposing more of your skin until he once again finds your hips. Then he completely removes his hand from your body so he can pull down his boxers and free his hard on, you’re pushing your underwear down your hips and quickly pulling it down your legs and shedding yourself off it.
He breaks the kiss to let out a hiss of pleasure, finally feeling the soft skin of your arse freely pressed against his hard cock.
Helping him a little, you lift your leg up so he can position himself better in between your legs. Your cheeks pressed together as he guides his hard dick up and down your folds, gathering your arousal and mixing it with the precum already dripping from his angry red head.
He giggles when he taunts you by rubbing the head of his cock on your clit, making you shiver and squirm from the desperate need to have him fill you up.
“Matty-” You choke out in a beg, feeling yourself clenching around nothing again and growing impatient.
The need he has to feel you wrapped tight around him again interrupts his thoughts of even continuing to tease you, so he properly lines himself up with your entrance and pushes forward to stretch you out and allow himself in again.
Cries of pleasure fall from both of you, creating a gorgeous harmony to your ears. The angle is something else, you can feel him so deep inside you and he feels like you’re trying to swallow him whole with how tight you are around him.
He pulls his hips back slightly, cautious of going too further back since it feels like with the tightness of your walls you could push him out, and pushes back in again until his hips are pressed flush against your arse.
The pace is set after a few more thrusts, intently and not too fast, hard enough for you to feel him press against that spot that drives you mad with each movement of his hips, drawing loud moans from you.
Praising you for how good you feel, he keeps going. The bed starts moving with you, your arousal wetting where you met and showing through the noises it causes every time your skin meets.
A thin coat of sweat appears on your skin as you keep going, your hand coming to fist the sheets next to you in an attempt to keep you grounded as you feel like the more the knot tightening in your lower belly, the more you lose grasp of reality.
Matty’s hand came behind your leg to push it up so he had more range of movement to push his hips forward and that is the thing which makes you both grow even louder. You have to press your face on the pillow to drown your moans, eventually having to turn your head so you can catch some air.
You’re clenching so hard around him, it’s driving him insane and the messy moans and groans he lets out he doesn’t even have the mind to think about. It makes everything for you so much better, not only is he making your head spin, knowing he’s feeling just as much pleasure makes your skin grow hotter.
In between choked out moans, you let him know you are about to tip over the edge, “Baby, I’m so close- F-feels so good!”
Your praise makes him grow even more intently to make you cum, so snaking his arm over your leg, he reaches down until he finds your clit and starts rubbing it, adding enough pressure to have you seeing stars.
“Oh fuck!” You let out loudly right before you cum, legs trembling as he continues to rub on your swollen clit and thrusting in and out of your slick cunt.
You’re clenching so hard around him, he can’t hold back any longer and cums hard, thrusts going sloppy as your tight walls milk him out through his orgasm.
He continues to ride your highs out, both of you coming back to your senses and it’s only when he pulls out of you that he realises a mistake you both hadn’t noticed.
“Fuck…” Matty curses under his breath when he notices he’s not got to shed himself of a condom because he forgot to even put one on.
For a few seconds you remain blissfully unaware, still tingling with adrenaline and excitement, you just think he’s cursing after the wave of pleasure and you giggle to yourself. But then he’s pulling his boxers up and running off the bed to the bathroom like he’s been shocked back to life and it leaves you confused.
That is until you feel it. You feel his cum slowly dripping out of you.
And when he walks through his bedroom door again, with a damp small towel in hand, you narrow your eyes at him like you’ve caught him red handed.
“Matthew.” You scorn with a low voice and he gives you a childish side smile like he’s trying to act innocent.
He lifts the sheets up from your body, showing you still wearing his shirt but your bottom half bare and sprawled on top of the bed.
“Sorry,” He apologises lightheartedly, kneeling on the bed until he’s hovering above you and leans down to press a kiss on your lips, “I didn’t realise.”
All you can do is giggle, because you hadn’t either, it’s not a surprise it felt so good. Thankfully you’re on birth control and you knew you had only been with each other so this wasn’t a matter to absolutely go insane about.
“It’s okay.” You mumble against his lips, stealing another kiss before he could get to cleaning you up like he was intending to.
Cupping his jaw, you break the kiss but leave him with a few pecks before you pat his cheek and instruct him to, “Go on.”
He steals one last cheeky kiss before looking down and doing what he was meant to do, which ends up being delayed as he seems entranced by the way he sees his seed spilling out of you slowly.
You’re watching him intently, biting your bottom lip not to laugh at the way he’s staring, but then a fair few more seconds go by and he’s completely frozen in his place so you have to snap him out of it.
“Matty!” You exclaim with the hint of a laugh behind it, which ends up spilling from your lips when his eyes shoot up to look at you and then back down and he ends up clearing his throat to nod.
“Sorry.” He apologises again, finally bringing the damp cloth down to clean you up. You hiss at the feeling of it brushing against your sensitive clit and his jaw falls when you swallow a moan.
Concentrating particularly hard, he finishes his task a minute later, once again leaving for the bathroom not without kissing you once more but this time reminding you, “You’re so hot baby.”
That draws another string of laughter from you, entirely amused by his behaviour. You can’t stop the loopy smile that breaks on your face when you watch him hurriedly leave the room like he has no time to waste when you’re around him.
Your heart doubles in size in your chest and as you gather the energy to get up to head to the bathroom yourself. You guess that the next few days with him will look just like this and you must admit, you wouldn’t have it any other way.
~*~*~*~*~*~
You were correct. Making the most of the beginning of January with Matty really did involve a lot of what happened after your date and the morning after. It was rare you ever left each other alone.
In fact, when you weren’t getting better acquainted with each other's bodies, you still didn’t leave each other alone. The first few days you spent solely at Matty’s house, and you both just relaxed into each other's company, but there wasn’t ever really a second you left each other unaccompanied.
If anyone else was in your presence, they would have thought you were both being embarrassingly clingy. Something which in private you absolutely can’t get enough of.
It was just the simple things about being in his presence that made you so happy. When he would lift your legs over his lap and trace soft patterns on your thigh, or him raising his arm so you would cuddle into him as you practically shared one seat on his three seater settee.
You cooked together, watched TV together, showered together, and just chilled out together doing your own things but you were always connected in one way or another. If Matty wanted to go on his PlayStation, your legs would be on his lap and you either watched him play and chatted as he did, or you read one of his books.
Not to mention the way he would lay down and put his head in your lap, or if you were in bed he would cuddle up to you refusing to let you go. You also found that Matty left kisses on you every chance he could. Whether that was a peck on the lips, or a random few placed on your arm or your knee or your stomach. He would basically kiss you any chance he could and then proceed to cuddle you.
One of the things you personally thought was the cutest thing about him, is that when you were getting ready to go to sleep each night, Matty would always interrupt you doing your skincare. At first he was just being a dick, squeezing or scooping more product out than you needed and then smearing it on your face to mess with you. But then you would start to use the excess on him so it wasn’t going to waste and that was how every night you started doing each other's skincare. Something which always had the both of you smiling goofily at each other and giggling until it hurt your stomach.
Everything was just so mundane and domestic. You let yourself indulge the thought of this being something more and you secretly really loved it. But you weren’t going to let yourself get too in your head about that. You’re enjoying yourself and you’re certain that Matty is too so you’ll wait for the conversation to be brought up, you’re in no rush to label anything. You’re just happy you’re along for the ride.
On the 3rd, Matty had his friend Sam drop Mayhem and Allen round for the day and you got to meet them both and they were the goodest boys. Despite Mayhem being fucking huge, he’s the softest boy and was so cute. Allen is just as good and it was a real shame when Matty got Sam to pick the both of them up the day after.
You’re sure he only did it so he could get you back into bed because whenever either of you would start something, one of the dogs would interrupt wanting attention. After the fifth time of it happening, you could see Matty slowly losing his patience so it wasn’t a shock that after the dogs left, you very quickly found yourself being undressed in his kitchen. And after bruising your knees for him, the both of you let desperation get the best of you, neither of you even attempted trying to make it to bed or even his settee in the next room.
On the 5th, George and Charli invited the both of you to their house, in the day this time, and you got to see it free of people socialising. You had a really nice day with them, Charli once again teasing you about Matty, just as much as Matty does himself, but you know she’s coming from a good place and seeing her and George together in their home filled your heart with so much joy.
A relationship like theirs is what you’ve been striving for. Their happiness is unmatched and the way they look at each other when they think no one else is looking is beyond heartwarming. You love them together and you can see just how much they adore each other.
The day after that was slightly different from the rest. You went for a walk around the area where he lives, and went out and bought yourselves some lunch at a cafe before heading back. It had been a really lovely day, but later on when you were lying down together and you were holding hands, your fingers intertwined, and you noticed a small scar on his knuckle. And when you asked about it, you almost regretted doing so immediately, but only because it looked like it hurt so much for him to tell you the story behind it.
Matty on the other hand, once he got through telling you, was happy that you finally knew about him and about his past. He hates the story, knowing all the consequences of what happened back when he got the scar, but he’s just happy you finally know pretty much everything about his past, relationship wise.
Throughout the time it took for him to tell you, he was apologising for getting emotional about it, as if he wasn’t explaining personal things that weren’t easy to get off his chest. You would hate to think that he would ever feel the need to apologise for crying about something so upsetting that happened to him. You kept assuring him that it was okay and you wiped away his tears when he didn’t do it himself sometimes and you were there to listen, and it just made you believe that you got to know him on a deeper, more intimate level.
You understand why he told you, you think he mostly wanted to warn you that he sometimes still had nightmares about it. And he told you that sometimes they wrecked him so badly that he had to call Flo to make sure that she was alright to calm his tears and erratic heartbeat before he could even try to go back to sleep. He explained that thankfully they were infrequent now but it was another reason that made it more difficult for him to sleep which is why he stayed up late a lot of the time.
It made you want to wrap him in bubble wrap and protect him at all costs. You could definitely tell that there was some factor of worry with him telling you, as if his trauma would somehow put you off him which it didn’t in the slightest. It just made you closer and that night you fell asleep with Matty cuddling you possibly the tightest he ever had before.
By the 7th, it felt bittersweet that a week had passed already and you were leaving for LA tomorrow and Matty was about to head off on tour. But you made the most of it. Matty made a show of making you cum on his tongue twice, leaving you aching to be filled and fucked, before he gave into your wishes and buried himself deep inside you over and over until you both came undone together.
After that glorious morning, the both of you reluctantly left the sanctuary of his bedroom and his house to go back to your flat and pack your things ready for LA. It didn’t take you long, you were there no longer than an hour and a half between Matty stopping you from completing your tasks with various make out sessions that he tried to turn into more but you only stopped him from letting it go any further because you knew if you didn’t pack everything and check it over twice you would be panicking later.
Thankfully Matty understood and he helped you pack rather excessively for a two day trip but regardless he found you endearing. Once you were done, Matty persuaded you to go back to his, which you agreed to so on route back both of you grabbed a take out.
After eating like kings and queens, you helped Matty pack for his tour. Like with your outfits for the carpet, your stylists were taking them for you, so you just helped him pack his normal clothes along with things he wanted to take. It took a similar amount of time as it did for you to pack as he was only away for 3 days before he was back in London and he would be staying at home for those days instead of on the bus. He would repack before they headed back on the road.
That night, the both of you fucked again until you were breathlessly clutching each other, entirely blissed out. And you tried your best to stay awake as long as you could afterwards just to extend the time you had with him, but, being the grandma you are, were a bit pathetic and fell asleep around midnight.
Time really felt like it had gotten away from you, it didn’t feel like a week had passed at all. For Matty especially, it felt like maybe two days had passed. He wasn’t ready to let you go yet, he wanted to have you cuddled into his chest like you were that last night forever. For a good hour he jut kept looking down at you and kissing the top of your head wondering how fucking lucky he must be for you to want to be wrapped up in bed with him.
It was nights like that where Matty didn’t mind his insomnia. He got to savour the moment for that bit longer which he would be forever grateful for because he truly can’t get enough of you. As you sleep in his arms, he reads a little from the book he could just about reach without disturbing you, but ultimately he ends up on his phone.
It may come back to bite him but he can’t stop himself from taking a selfie of the both of you lying together like that. He takes a few, one he knows you’ll hate because it’s mostly of your sleeping face with his head poking out above it, but then he raises the phone to take some from above, and the last few he kisses your head again.
After getting lost scrolling through twitter and laughing at the various memes the fans have been posting recently, Matty remembers his account that he deactivated almost a month ago now and curses himself for letting it go for so long. He reactivates it and pisses about on it for a while, tweeting a few things and giving it about half an hour before he deactivates once again.
Once he’s bored of that, he decides to make the most of you cuddling up into him again. He puts his phone on charge and turns off the bedside lamp before wrapping both his arms around you and hugging you tighter. The cute little noise you release, which sounds like a content hum, has Matty’s heart aching even more for you. He’s never been so happy to fall asleep beside someone before.
Waking up the next morning is blissful. Matty’s arm is loosely wrapped around your waist and your senses are completely overcome by him. It was difficult to accept that this would be the last time for a while after waking up to him every day the past week. So you savour it, you don’t get out of bed or even try to move, you just reach for your phone and check your notifications.
When you do, you want to elbow the man beside you awake because the twat had been back on Twitter after you fell asleep. Something which you loved but also slightly hated because you felt like you missed out on him reactivating and seeing something potentially funny, as if you were in bed next to the man himself and have been by his side all week.
When you went onto your phone, you saw screenshots from The 1975 update accounts you follow on there on your anonymous account, and saw that Matty had tweeted.
ok I reactivated so I didn’t loose this, honestly, culturally important account I’ll see you after UK tour gunna be mysterious
The spelling mistake made you chuckle, but it’s the next tweet that has you smiling like a fool before you’re even fully awake.
oh and I’ve got myself a missus so there can't be any kissin, cya losers
Seeing them leaves you with a gooey feeling in your stomach despite reminding yourself not to get ahead of yourself. But because it's your last morning you don’t want to just waste it. You twist yourself around and start kissing the man beside you awake. It may be a little selfish of you but you don't want to miss a second and Matty seems more than happy to wake up when he catches sight of you.
That morning, you spent a fair amount of time in bed, both busy and just cuddling, not wanting it to be over so soon. But when midday arrives you know Matty has to start getting ready to go. He’s meeting everyone at 3pm and on the way he said he wanted to drop you off at Amelia's.
When the time came to say goodbye, it felt bittersweet. You were both excited, you for the Golden Globes and Matty for the start of tour, but you didn’t want to say goodbye. There was a lot of hesitation and it was lucky the both of you set off early because it ended up being so drawn out.
You laughed because you were both only going away for a few days and you would be back for their first night in London. After lots of stolen kisses and an incredibly long hug you finally said goodbye to each other and you made your way into your best friend's flat but not before turning back and blowing a kiss to the cute curly haired brunette who wouldn’t take his eyes off you.
The whole afternoon you were texting each other, and it only stopped when they were soundchecking. But even then he sent you a selfie of himself on the stage which was adorable.
Time ends up escaping you though and knowing they go on stage at 8:30 you decide to send him your last message of the evening because you know that by the time he gets off stage you’ll be on the plane.
Hope your first show back goes amazing, can’t wait to watch all the videos x
Matty’s heart goes all mushy reading that and he doesn’t hesitate for a second to reply.
Thank you baby, have a safe flight xx
Please let me know when you’ve arrived safe xxx
And before you knew it you were on the way to LA.
~*~*~*~
When you land in LA after your 11 hour flight, it was around 1am on the 9th. In normal circumstances, this would be fine and you would be off to sleep easily when you got to your hotel by 2am. But no, you slept for 6 hours on the plane so you weren’t even tired when you got in bed.
So it was at that point you went on Twitter and devoured the content from Matty’s first show back on the road. Nothing about it disappointed and it all made you so excited for the London shows in a few days time.
After you caught up on the previous night's events, Matty must have woken up because he texted you back (you messaged him when you landed to tell him you made it safely) and that sparked a conversation. He told you how amazing the show was and how he wished you were there to see some of the stuff he witnessed.
The conversation moves back to your flight over and he wasn’t surprised at all to hear you slept for a while on the plane. And then he realises that it’s almost 5:30 for you and he forces you off the phone to try and get some more sleep.
It’s something which you reluctantly agreed to, and it was a pointless exercise for a few hours because you just ended up reading the book that you bought in dutyfree that you hoped to read on the plane but only managed a chapter. That being said, you did manage to get another hour or so of sleep around 8am, but you were woken up by Amelia at 9am for you both to go down to breakfast and to start your busy day.
Despite your lack of sleep, you and Amelia headed out to spend your only free day sightseeing. You’ve never been to LA before so you were cramming everything tourist wise in you could think of.
You went and found your favourite people on the walk of fame, before heading into the illusion museum where you both took some hilarious pictures. It made you feel like you were teenagers pissing about again on a day off school, it was so much fun.
Next you went to all the landmarks but thankfully you did this on a tour bus so you weren’t wandering around aimlessly for hours. You had the best time pointing things out from various films you'd seen over the years, it got you all giddy, you felt like a child being given free sweets.
A mistake on your and your best friends' part would be that you went and did the long walk up to the Hollywood sign at the hottest hour of the day. The climate in this part of the world is fucking weird when you’re used to constant dreary weather, and you also realised you’re not as fit as you think you are because your muscles burnt once you were finished. That being said, your and Amelia’s pictures with the sign in the background made it totally worth it.
It was your favourite picture that you took all day. The both of you looked so happy in it and your spirits are so high as it really feels like all of your dreams are coming true. You don’t think you’ve ever been so content in your life, and it really shows in your smile. The first thing you did when you got back to a place with signal was send it to Matty.
Speaking of, Matty’s been texting you most of the day and every time your phone went off and caught a glimpse of his name you felt your cheeks heat up a little as a smile took over your face. It seems like a conditioned reaction for you now, even when he’s not flirting, seeing his name light up your phone just makes you happy. All other notifications seem pretty dull in comparison.
Amelia noticed quite a few times in the day and whilst it warmed her heart to see you happy, there was that feeling bubbling inside her that wanted to protect you from things that could be too good to be true. Yes, you and Matty have a lot of chemistry and you seem to get on like a house on fire. But the last thing she wants is for you to get hurt, so she decides that she needs to talk to you about it.
But when she does that evening, she blindsides you with it.
Currently, you’re in Amelia’s hotel room with her beside you in bed and you’re watching a film. It’s no surprise that your eyes are growing heavy now though as you’ve only had 7 hours sleep in the past 48 hours, and you’ve been awake close to 30 hours and doing a lot in your day.
Crashing feels like an understatement but you’re here beside Amelia now as the both of you are trying to keep each other awake so you’re not horrendously jetlagged for your rehearsal day tomorrow or for the awards themselves the night after. Thankfully she’s been good at keeping you awake but nothing will prepare you for the wake up call she’s about to drop on you.
Your eyes close and it’s like your emotions heighten as you get lost in the feeling of your current situation. You’re in Hollywood with your best friend, about to be a host at the red carpet of one of the most prestigious award events, you’ve just had the best room service food you’ve ever had, laying in a cosy and soft bed as the closing credits score to one of your favourite films is playing in the background.
Nothing could ever top this is all you can think, even everything back home seems to be going wonderfully and you’re about to look for some wood to touch so you don’t jinx it for yourself when you hear Amelia’s soft voice call out to you.
“Hey Y/N/N.”
You hum at first but it turns into a, “Yeah?” and you open your eyes slowly with a blissed look on your face as you turn to look at her.
At first you’re thankful she woke you again because it’s only early still, you definitely needed to not fall asleep just yet. But when you see your best friend turn to face you too, tucking her hand under her cheek to get comfortable over the plush pillows on her bed, you realise she wants to chat.
Amelia sighs softly and her face gets serious, and if that wasn’t enough to scare you a bit, it’s the way her tone changes as she starts saying, “I know you don’t want to hear it and I don’t mean it in the way it’s going to sound but if I don’t say it and you get hurt, I won’t forgive myself.”
Instantly, all the joy in your system disappears, dread seeping in for whatever it is she’s about to say. There’s nothing you’re actually expecting but the weight at the pit of your stomach is getting heavier the more time she takes to continue, “What is it Ames?”
“I know you’re having a lot of fun with Matty and I'm really happy for you.” You almost tune out at the mention of his name, but seeing how serious she is you know it’s another one of those times you need to listen to her, “I truly, honestly am.” She reassures with a slight raise of her eyebrows and a nod as if to emphasise her point.
Yet you’re left waiting for the inevitable but, and sure enough, it comes after a fair few seconds, “But I just want you to be careful… I don’t want you to get feelings, or more feelings, when it could just end up being a friends with benefits thing.”
You’re truly at a loss for words as the wheel inside your brain starts to spin and the more seconds pass, the faster it spins.
Amelia has been your best friend for years and whilst she’s had your back unconditionally for what seems like forever now, she’s also always been honest with you. Whether it was you making a stupid mistake that you were too stubborn to admit fault to, an outfit that just didn’t look good, pushing you to say sorry when you had to or you pining over someone who didn’t deserve you at all. She’s always been the one to say it like it was and kindly enough to have you snap out of so many trances.
Never have you ever gotten angry at her, because you’ve learned that she always wants the best for you and even when the truth hurts, at the end of the day you realised she was right and she was watching out for you.
So the first thing you feel deep in your chest isn’t anger, it’s just that pinch of hurt when you know someone says what you don’t want to hear but it’s not something that’s necessarily wrong. But that doesn’t make it any less painful to hear.
“I'm not saying stop,” She continues in slight panic at the change in your facial expression, “I can see how happy he makes you and how happy you seem to make him. And I don’t think he would have had you around for a full week if he was just going to fuck and dump you, but maybe when you go back you could get some clarity on it? Ask him about it maybe? Because the last thing I want is for him to hurt you.”
Her suggestions are thrown in the air as a way to alleviate the growing tension around you now, hanging over you like a dark cloud that tells you it’s about to storm. But even seeing her soft awkward grin as she finishes her thoughts, you can’t seem to properly muster any logical sentences.
Your words get tangled on the tip of your tongue and you stutter for a few seconds before you let out a loud sigh and chuckle meekly, slightly shaking your head in disbelief, “Thanks Ames.”
Amelia winces at your response and the words leave her before you can continue saying anything else, “I don’t want you to hate me for saying it, Y/N/N.”
You know she doesn’t mean it like that so you quickly reassure her that your reaction doesn’t mean that you hate her for saying it, “I don’t. I-,”
Inhaling deeply through your nose before you can give her a deeper insight into what’s been going on between the singer and you. “He’s told me things that I don’t think you’d tell a fuck buddy. Things about his past that he got upset about. I don’t think you cry to your fuck buddies Ames.”
It’s not that you mind her being worried about you, but it wasn’t as if Matty is all you’ve been going on about today. It wasn’t like your world has just stopped and it now solely focuses on him, because it really doesn’t. You’ve maybe mentioned the singer a handful of times today, most of the time telling her that he said hello to her or that he hoped that the both of you were having a nice time.
Nodding slowly, she takes in what you're saying but she recoils into herself a bit when you continue to say, “And I'm not stupid, I'm not getting my hopes up for anything more just yet, I just want to enjoy what it is for now.”
Because Amelia of all people knows that you haven't had anything like this in a long time. You’ve been on your own for probably too long and you feel like some of the joy from the past week has just been invalidated when you weren’t even trying to make it into something it wasn’t.
“I understand. But it’s worth having the conversation.” Amelia explains herself again and you nod taking in every word she says, “I don’t want you to be a placeholder for him. I don’t want you to be someone who’s willing to fuck him and then he fucks you off after the London dates on his tour.”
That has you sighing again, that last half feeling like a gut punch. But you somehow manage to nod, “I know, and I do mean the thank you I said, but I don’t wanna be thinking about that whilst we’re out here okay?”
You were just having such a lovely moment of peace and appreciation for everything turning out better than you could’ve ever expected and now all you can taste is bitterness coating the back of your throat. “It’s not really something you can ask over the phone. And I want this to be a good experience. I don’t wanna be worrying about Matty whilst I’m out here.”
You mean that and even though you have been texting him here and there throughout the day, you’ve made sure to be mindful and enjoy every second you can with your best friend in this amazing opportunity you’ve got.
“I know. I’m sorry. I didn’t really know when to talk to you about it.” Her eyes show you just how much she didn’t mean to upset you, and they soften when she looks at you still sporting a blank face.
And despite knowing that, it unfortunately doesn’t make that sinking feeling in your chest go away. You feel like the mere mention of it has cracked open a can of worms that can’t be sealed again. The seeds of doubt that you’ve been ignoring to spare yourself the worry are now fixed and prominent. It all feels a little too much when you just wanted to have some fun with a man you’ve always found horrendously attractive.
“I’m only a week into it all Ames.” You remind her and then you also refresh her memories of her and a certain rapper by saying, “I at least gave you a good few weeks with Harry before I told you to watch out.”
She nods remembering then how that had gone, “And whilst I love you for that, I know that you’ve liked Matty for a lot longer than I liked him. A year to a decade… I just don’t want him to hurt you or ruin his music for you.”
She’s so serious it half makes you want to laugh, your best friend regarding the value of the band’s music as much as your heart being mistreated is the tiniest bit amusing to you.
“It won’t. Nothing could ruin his music for me. Not even him.” You promise, staring right into her eyes and then you plead, “I understand but for now I just want it out of my mind please. I appreciate you but please don’t bring this back up whilst we’re here. I want your support back.”
Reaching out for her hand, she meets you in the middle intertwining your fingers and then giving you a firm squeeze. A silent love you, one that you reciprocate by squeezing her hand back.
“Okay. You’ve got it. I am really really happy you’re happy, you know?” Her lips curl up in a cute shy smile, seeing as the matter is still a bit tender but trying to help you relax again.
Not that you can find it in yourself to do it after that but you try to match her smile, failing apparently because you see Amelia’s face falling as she watches you say, “I know.”
So Amelia is soon shuffling closer to you, cradling your head with her hand so you can cuddle against her chest. She leaves a kiss atop of your head and you hum softly as a thank you, which you truly mean - she’s the one person you know you wouldn’t be able to live without and her opinions are not ones you wave off or take lightly.
However, it feels like the night just turned sour, because 5 minutes ago if your best friend cuddled you like she is doing now, you would be entirely content with it. Now, all you want to do is disappear off into your own room and release the sob that’s causing the ball in your throat.
You can’t do that though, because the last thing you need is to let your best friend see that she’s upset you. The first reason being is that you don’t want to make her feel guilty for upsetting you when she’s got your best interests at heart, but mostly because you don’t want her to think that your tears are proof of her being correct. So you hold it in, not letting her think she’s affected you at all.
Sleep has escaped you now entirely, the few minutes of her cuddling you are not peaceful like she probably intended. Instead, you’ve started to overthink what she’s just said, her words repeating in your head like a broken record. It makes your throat tighten even more despite knowing she’s right, but you hate the sour taste in your mouth.
There’s only so long you can last before you get up and go to your room under the false pretence that you’re really tired. Amelia hugs you one more time and again you pretend like you’re fine, but your best friend knows you well enough and can see you’re faking. She regrets bringing it up before the awards, thinking it’s not fair to have added that to your plate along with the stress you’re both feeling.
All she can do so she doesn’t bring it up again is grab your hand and remind you that she loves you. Something which you say back to her and she’s beyond grateful you said it back.
Finding yourself back in bed, now in your hotel room, unfortunately your mind goes back to your conversation and begins replaying every word she’s said.
Like a broken record, spinning over and over, until you lose track of time and when your phone pings from where it’s charging on top of the nightstand, you softly gasp at it being 7pm when the last time you saw the time it was 4pm and you and Amelia were complaining about jetlag betraying you and making you look like even worse grandmas that you already were.
When you get your phone, you see Matty’s messages flash on the screen. Another one coming through as you unlock your phone.
How’s jetlag treating you baby? x is the first one he’s sent, followed by, You better not be asleep yet cos I will laugh if you are, you gilf x
You giggle to yourself at the use of the term, thinking back to how the term came to be used for you and how insane it is that the week of holidays you spent texting and facetime feels so long ago now.
Deciding to be fully honest and give into the distraction from your thoughts, you type, It’s kicking my arse 🙁 and as soon that has sent, you send a second text that reads, How’d you even do it? Tour must be so exhausting x
You get used to it x reads the almost instant text he sends but then you’re waiting for what he’s gonna say next as the bubble appears and you’re watching the three dots flicker with anticipation.
A few seconds later it comes through and you’re giggling when you read, You learn to find how to keep yourself distracted more like, to forget you’re tired in the first place x
Cheekily, you ask, Is that code for something? x and to tease him a bit, you add, If so I have to add it to the list under ‘socialising’ as Ross gave us the meaning to that one x
A chesty laugh falls from your lips when his next text comes through and it plainly says, Let’s actually ban the topic of Ross from conversation x
And it’s impossible for you to hold back from using that to provoke him a bit, Ooo is someone jealous? x
His answer isn’t quite what you expected and it earns a gasp out of you when you read he’s said, You, still, of that kiss I gave him x and the memory of you posting that to your instagram comes to bite you on the arse.
The only thing you can think of replying is with a sarcastic, You think you’re funny x
Which he refutes effortlessly with, I know I’m fucking hilarious baby x
Biting your lip and feeling your cheeks heat up, your fingers type an earnest confession that you hope he reciprocates, I miss you xx
But your blood goes cold when his response comes through and it’s just, Oh you miss me? Yeah well, you haven’t had anyone to fuck you good all week so I was expecting that x
Reading that text sinks your heart, and it shouldn’t because you know in any other moment you would’ve found it hilarious and chatted back almost automatically but after having Amelia’s words engraved in the walls of your brain after replaying them so much, you’re left with the awful feeling that she might be right.
You try not to cry when you’re unable to stop yourself from overthinking. Oh you miss me? Yeah well, you haven’t had anyone to fuck you good all week so I was expecting that x. You had just said you missed him and that being the response leaves you gutted.
What if that’s actually all that it is for him? What if everything had just been to ease you into bed with him and now that he had you in the palm of his hand, he was reaching out to you to get some sort of release?
After all it was 3am for him, which other reason would there be for him to be texting this late when he should’ve been tired enough to be out the second he got in his bunk. The ghost of the conversation about his nightmares pokes at your racing mind and whilst your logical side is screaming at you about that being a reason for his texts this late in the evening, you’re far too gone to even try and change your mind.
You’re so stupid. And all you want to do is cry into your pillow.
But you still have got makeup on and, if it was any other day, you’d let the sadness push you to fall asleep with it on but tomorrow you start prepping for the bloody Golden Globes. Rehearsals start early in the morning, and the last thing you want the day after when you’re on the red carpet is a surprise spot appearing on your skin when you’re about to be photographed left, right and centre.
Your feet lazily take you up to the bathroom and you’re languidly getting a makeup wipe when your ringtone startles you. You’re slightly faster in getting your phone because the noise is threatening to push you further into getting a headache.
And then you see it, Matty on the screen, wanting to facetime you and there’s that sinking feeling getting heavier inside you. You know you’ve left him on read, and it’s now that you realise that was half an hour ago and you feel bad.
You consider not answering, blaming it on falling asleep but deep inside you want some sort of comfort, a sign of an answer that maybe Amelia is wrong - that maybe this time she has misread the situation.
So you swipe on your screen as you go back to the bathroom, taking the makeup off your face and looking at your reflection in the mirror rather than at him on your phone.
“Hi baby.” Matty says with a smile, you can catch it faintly from the way the brightness of his screen is lighting up his face.
“Hi.” You reply sheepishly, and that tone is enough for him to know something’s not right.
“What’s wrong?” He asks with a pout, then he backtracks trying to think of what’s gotten you upset and he quickly adds, “You know I was joking right?” He’s silently hoping that isn’t it though, the last thing he wanted was to get you upset but he knows how sometimes jokes don’t land right through text.
You panic as though he’s just been able to read your mind and your mouth is faster than you spilling something else out so he doesn’t think it is exactly that which has you like this. Well that and Amelia’s worries. So putting the now used makeup wipe down by the sink, you shake your head.
“It’s not-” You try to deny but everything is sitting heavy on your chest and your eyes begin to well up on their own accord.
You still can’t look at your phone and you think you’re even more pathetic about letting this get to you. And you know it’s only affecting you so much because you’ve been awake well over 24 hours to try and get your body clock in order for tomorrow, but it’s completely taken away your composure. So you just end up blaming everything on that.
“I- I’m so nervous and overwhelmed, and this jetlag is actually making me want to fucking cry.” At the end you actually let out a pathetic little sob which breaks his heart, you’re holding onto the marble top where the sink is and hang your head so your hair covers your face while you silently cry.
“Oh no babyyy,” You hear him say through the phone, perhaps a bit louder than he should in a bus filled with his sleeping bandmates, “You should’ve said you were upset, I wouldn’t have been an absolute dick then.”
You shake your head and sniffle but when you’re about to put your head up to look at him on the screen, another cry bursts through you and you let your head fall down once more.
“Baby don’t cry, I’m sorry.” His heart hurts in his chest, “Fuck, I’m such an idiot.”
He could feel something was wrong as soon as his message went from sent to read and there was no sign of the three dots. Somehow he just knew and the sinking feeling in his stomach made him FaceTime you, and now he's beyond thankful he did.
“No,” You sniffle loudly and force yourself to look up.
Your throat is so choked up, it’s difficult to get anything out at all. You have to look away from him for a second and you cover your mouth with your fist for a few seconds.
Matty’s heart hurts seeing the shine of your eyes as they well up again, and he wants to say something but you look like you need to work through it for a second so he waits until you’ve taken a few deep breaths and look back at him. “Can you podcast me baby… Please?” You just about get out.
You wipe your tears quickly and you look at him, giving him a soft smile and getting a new wipe to continue taking your makeup off. After swallowing the lump in your throat, you say, “Tell me how the show was tonight.”
Matty makes sure to be the most dramatic to get a smile out of you, even a laugh if he’s lucky enough, “Well obviously brilliant ‘cause it’s us.” He rolls his eyes and clicks his tongue, shaking his head a bit and his curls bounce at the movement.
Your short snort makes him grin harder, and you reply with a blunt, “Right.” as if you don’t believe that statement.
He lets his jaw fall like he’s deeply offended and then points an accusing finger at you as he calls you out by saying, “Don’t act like you don’t agree baby, you’ve been here for almost a decade and that means something.”
You finish removing your makeup then, so you raise your hands up to feign innocence, “I was agreeing.”
The curly headed brunette narrows his eyes at you and keeps quiet for a mere few seconds, acting like he’s debating whether he believes you or not, until he decides, “Good, because I also wore leather tonight in your honour.”
A little smirk tugs at the corners of your lips, “Ooooo” you mutter teasingly while you try to picture in your head what exactly he’s worn tonight. You curse yourself for being in your head so much and forgetting to check twitter for your daily dose of tour content.
Before you can say anything else, though, he adds, “Because I miss you. A lot.” and you didn’t know how much you wanted to hear that until then.
It’s like the simple reassurance that he indeed does miss you too, quiets down the storm in your head. You can breathe a little better, all the while you can also feel your heart swell up inside your chest and you can’t not reciprocate the feeling, “Miss you too.”
The singer pouts at the fact that he has to tell you this through the phone and can’t give you a cuddle so he gets an idea that makes him inquire, “Where’s Amelia? I want her to hug you for me.”
That question shouldn’t be something to bring up suspicion but Matty doesn’t miss the way your face falls at the mention of your best friend and right then he gets this gut feeling that maybe something happened between you two that also has you upset.
Somehow, your awkward, “Erm, she’s in her room.” gives it away even more and though he wants nothing more than to ask you about it, he’d rather not have you upset and crying again when he knows you can be laughing and smiling when talking about something else.
So taking a bit of a pause, he thinks and ends up asking you, “Have you gone to see the Hollywood sign yet?”
You go off frame as you go to throw the makeup wipes to the bin and then splash your face with some water to wash your face. “Yes, a fucking awful hike but t’was pretty.” Is what you reply, remembering just how much you were sweating earlier but also shivering a bit at the stark contrast when you went back to the car.
Matty watches as you pour something in the palm of your hand and rub it together between your hands before rubbing it on your face until it becomes foamy. “It isn’t hot though is it?” It’s just the second week of January and he has a faint memory of being in the west coast during that time of the year and it not being hot at all, “At least you weren’t fucking cooking while going up there.”
You quickly wash the cleanser off and whilst you’re patting your face dry, you continue giving him the details, “Wind was cold but the sun was out so we were cooking in our jackets. The desert weather is confusing.”
“More confusing than ours?” His tone is almost teasing, making you smile a bit to yourself under his gaze.
“A bit yeah.” You nod, opening your little moisturiser tub and getting some to apply onto your face.
The second you dot it around your face and neck, he’s asking, “Is that the cream I like you’re putting on?”
The massive grin that appears on your face is impossible to hold back, not when the memories of you having to do the same you’re doing to yourself on him the whole past week when he watched you through the mirror getting ready for bed.
“Yeah. You’ve made me go through half my bottle already though, you little shit.” In slow soft motions, you’re rubbing it on your skin and you relish in the cooling feeling of the gel like cream on your face.
He clicks his tongue like that’s not even an issue, “Don’t worry baby, I’ll get you more when you come back.”
Humming, you warn him, “I’ll remind you of that.”
“Yeah ‘cause I’m in actual need to relax like when you put all those things on my face.” Matty admits and it makes you want to giggle.
A snort escapes your lips, “You mean when I do your skin care?”
“Mhm, I love it.”
Rolling your eyes, you call him out, “I know you do, you’re so needy.”
But he then reminds you, “I told you I was.” and you two share loopy grins through the screen as you see the memories of your first date showing in the forefront of your minds.
“That you did.” You nod, agreeing with him and tapping some eye cream over your eye bags. Covering your mouth when you yawn, you look at the time and ask him with a frown, “Isn’t it almost 4am for you?”
Matty pauses for a second, glancing up to see the time in the corner of his phone screen and is rather surprised, “Oh yeah, I guess so.” And trying to get you laughing again, he continues with, “Quick maths baby, that’s impressive.”
But the lack of sleep he’s currently having has you worried enough to inquire, “Is everything alright?” You don’t want to explicitly ask if he’s gotten any nightmares, especially since he’s sleeping in a moving vehicle but from the look in his eyes, you know he knows exactly what you mean by that.
His chest tightens at how cute you are so he calms your worries by explaining, “Yes, nothing’s wrong, just a bit of insomnia ‘cause I’m still feeling the energy from the gig.”
“Okay, if you say so.” Your trust that he’d tell you if he was having nightmares has faltered slightly after what was said earlier. You feel so stupid being hung up on it, but just the thought of opening up to each other only being so you could get something physical out of each other makes you start to spiral again.
You’re cut short, not even being able to lose it again when he continues saying, “Wish I could have you here though, I wanna cuddle you so badly.”
A bit apprehensive, you sigh, “Me too.” but then you can’t keep from being honest with him, “I’m too nervous about tomorrow, and that’s only rehearsals, I don’t know if I’m even gonna be able to sleep tomorrow night.”
“Baby you’re gonna do amazing.” He assures you with sweet conviction, “You and Amelia. You always do.”
Your insides flood with warmth and you try to ignore it so he can’t catch how flustered you are by the compliment. “You’re being nice.”
“No, I mean it. You learned all that information about everyone attending so easily, I don’t think I’ve known more about the current film and TV culture than now after you’ve told me everything you know when you were practising.”
You’re chuckling then, leave it to him to not keep up to date to the most current media to be consumed. Getting your phone and exiting the bathroom after turning off the lights, you leave your phone on the floor by your case while you look for your pyjamas, “You’re an old man. Absolute grandpa.” You rub it in like it’s gonna offend him but you should’ve expected the opposite.
“And you’re my gilf, remember?” You hear the smirk before you can see it, but you don’t give him the pleasure of a reply as you just start stripping down to your underwear and put on your cute pyjama set that consists of a button up shirt and some matching shorts.
“Those pyjamas are cute.” Matty compliments, catching the chicken nuggets and the little ketchup packets all over them.
“Right!” You reply all excited, taking the moment to appreciate the clothes again, “Our manager gave them to us for Christmas, has my name right here.” You show him the embroidered Y/N that rests over your left breast with a cute smile on your face.
He smiles right back, “That’s cute. You look better in my clothes though.” He quips back, and you’re about to taunt him by arguing the pyjamas are better than his shirts when he just sighs longingly and says, “You’re so stunning baby.”
You’d just set up your phone against the lamp on the nightstand so you can talk to him as you get in bed but you freeze in your spot, sitting on the edge of the bed, lips pressing together so a big smile doesn’t break on your face.
“Stop,” You warn and then cup your cheeks with your cold hands, “You’re making me flustered.”
Matty knows you’re flustered so he grins proudly at you and admits, “I know, that’s what I’m aiming for.”
“Well you’re not allowed.” You chat back like that’s enough of an argument against him.
Trying not to giggle, he asks, “Why?”
“Because no.” You reply through your teeth, avoiding much eye contact because you know that’ll get you even worse and you don’t need that now.
“Oh but why,” His grin is huge, “Look at that smile!”
He’s impossible not to react to, so you hide behind your hands and whine, “You’re so annoying.” a bit louder than you anticipated.
“Say that again.” He suggests with a smirk on his face, once again, one that you can hear before you see it.
Your hands fall from your face, your smile stuck on your face even when you try to act menacing as you narrow your eyes and says a quick, “Fuck you.”
You can never win, not when he chuckles and quips back with, “You wish you were.” and all you can do is shriek and tell him he’s insufferable again.
Both of you giggle until a comfortable silence falls between you and you end up silently smiling at one another. That is until you rub your eyes a little, getting tired once again, but Matty just needs to know, so he asks softly, “Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” You nod, giving him a small smile, “Everythings just-” You pause for a second not wanting to get emotional again, so you release a long breath and continue, “A lot.”
Matty sees your eyes get a little glossy again, but not nearly as fast as last time. So he quickly intervenes and tries to make you laugh.
“I can’t believe the first time you’re upset in front of me is when I'm over five thousand miles away from you.” Matty says loudly and dramatically, and he moves the camera closer so he can tell you off. “You’re not allowed to do that in future. If you’re upset you have to just come and cuddle me, yeah? No messing about, I just hug you until you start to feel better okay, like you did for me.”
Your chest aches at the mere thought. That is all you want right now. You don’t know how he could get any cuter.
Matty’s smile is huge when he promises, “I’ll do whatever you need.”
All you want to do is give him a hug, so you just curl up in bed and hug your pillow and prop him up against the lamp on the bedside table so you can still talk. Once you’re settled and you’re smiling at him, you say, “Should have brought my blanket with me so I can pretend I’ve got you cuddling me.”
Matty chuckles at that, loving seeing the smile on your face. He doesn’t hesitate to say, “If I wasn’t on tour I would have flown out with you.”
You almost snort at that despite the fact you know he’s being genuine and serious, you just elect to tease him, “Such a flirt with those big gestures of yours.”
“Well, you know me.” Matty chuckles, “I don’t do half-hearted.”
After that you make him go to his bunk and at least try to get some sleep. You end up whispering to each other as you watch the other slowly fall asleep. Thankfully you see Matty dose off first so there’s a content smile on your face as your eyes slowly close and you let sleep take you.
~*~*~*~*~*~
You wake up the next morning with a smile on your face. One entirely brought by your conversation with Matty having settled down your doubts, one that lasted all throughout the time you were getting ready to leave for rehearsals, breakfast and on the way to the venue.
When you hit the red carpet, nerves overcame you but joy filled every corner of your body along with the intense impostor syndrome that you were starting to get acquainted with. It all was eliciting a massive smile from you which hurt your cheekbones, you just couldn’t quite believe you were there. And Amelia was feeling just the same.
Rehearsals are almost done, you and Amelia had been there for hours by then and it was mental to see the various interviewers there with their respective crews rehearsing for the very next day. Your crew tells you you’re almost done, only having to go over the last bit which was basically the send off once you’d wrap your section up the next day, and after that you were good to go back to the hotel.
But before you can finish that up, the crew give you a five minute break whilst they figure out some things behind the scenes.
Once you two finally have a moment to finally breathe, that’s when your best friend comes up to you and brings back the chat you’d rather keep buried.
“Y/N/N, I’m sorry,” Amelia starts saying, lowering her microphone and cue cards until they’re pressed beside her thigh and the grin she had on her face is replaced by her furrowed brows and lips pressed together in sorrow when looking back, “About last night, I shouldn’t have said what I said. I know better than that and there’s only so much I know about what you have with Matty, and even though it seems-”
“Ames.” You cut her off before she can say more because your heart was already sinking and you felt yourself start going cold since you had no idea what to expect now. “Don’t. I know what you meant last night and I appreciate your concern, you know I do, but please let’s not do this right now.”
“But-,” Amelia tried to get her words out again but you wouldn’t budge.
“Not here Ames.” You pleaded once more, the last thing you wanted was to get upset in the middle of rehearsals and in front of the crew. Dryly adding, “We can do this back at the hotel, if you insist on continuing the conversation.”
Thankfully Amelia accepts your bargain, not wanting to have you upset again at the venue, so she just presses her lips together and nods.
“Right.” She agrees and coming closer to you, she throws her arm around your shoulder and hugs you into her side, “Love you, Y/N/N.”
You smile back, thankful for her understanding, leaning into her and reciprocating the feeling, “Love you too, Ames.”
After that, you had used the few minutes left of your rest to openly marvel about the whole thing to each other, pinching each other’s arms at the same time and exploding in giggles when you realised you really weren’t dreaming.
The rest of the rehearsal went smoothly and once you wrapped up, the crew congratulated you on a brilliant rehearsal and let you go.
As soon as you get to the hotel, you order room service and do a repeat of the previous night, watching a film as you eat but this time the film is completely forgotten because once you remember just how big the ceremony is, you two frantically look for you flash cards with information so you can go over it all to ensure you don’t fuck up the next day.
Thankfully, that had been why you both forgot to speak about your situation with Matty. So by the time you’re doing your skin care and getting ready to head to bed, texting Matty until he stopped replying because he definitely fell asleep, you have a massive grin on your face and your anticipation for the following day is doing nothing but bubble up your chest and make your stomach flutter.
~*~*~*~
The next morning was even more nerve-racking. You had taken longer having breakfast because the nerves weren’t helping with your ability to swallow your food without feeling like it could come right back up the next second.
But when your team got to the hotel and everyone was gathered in Amelia’s room to do a little speech of encouragement and congratulate everyone for such a big achievement, you and Amelia settled a bit.
You’re just coming out of taking a shower, being ushered by your manager who had just come back from hurrying Amelia up since she had taken a long time in the shower too, when you hear your phone ringing with what you know it’s a facetime call.
And it’s not hard to guess who it is.
The smirk on your manager’s face is enough for you to know you guessed right and when she hands you your phone, you answer Matty’s call with a bright smile.
“Hiya baby.” He greets loudly, making everyone in the room turn to look at you with a teasing smirk.
That detail being unbeknownst to him has him thinking that you’re blushing over his mere use of the pet name so he playfully calls you out by saying, “Blushing already? I haven’t even said anything yet, baby.”
Before he can even think of opening his mouth again, you’re calling out loud, “Right, someone get me my airpods please.”
Once he heard that, he realised what had happened and the situation only elicited a loud cackle from him. He found out after New Years that he enjoyed a lot when you got flustered at the things he’d say in public, your bright red cheeks making you seem all innocent as if you wouldn’t love to hear the things he said in private, as if you wouldn’t reply with something even worse.
It gets worse for you when he cheekily adds, “Please do get her AirPods, things are about to get raunchy.”
“Shut up!” You hiss through your teeth, making everyone in the room laugh at your embarrassed state. And when your stylist finally finds your airpods inside your bag and hands them to you, you thank her almost impatiently.
Clearing your throat, you put your airpods in your ears and only then is that you greet him back, “Hello, you menace.”
“Oh, please, you love me.” He quips back, rolling his eyes as he brushes his hair back and you’re so beyond happy to see his curls free of any product.
Still, you don’t let it show as you sigh and give him a meek, “Whatever helps you sleep at night.” in response.
“You’re in denial baby,” He tuts, clicking his tongue as he shakes his head but he doesn’t let you say anything back because then he lets his sweet smile back on his face and he genuinely asks, “How’s your morning going?”
“I’m shitting bricks.” You admit quite honestly, stifling a laugh by biting your bottom lip.
Matty actually lets his amusement show with another loud string of giggles, the sound hitting your ears warm you up inside and has your chest feeling tight from how much you miss him.
“You’re gonna do amazing, baby. Nothing to be nervous about.”
His tone is so nonchalant, it has you scoffing. You know it is because he has faith in you and how good you are at your job, but you decide joking about it rather than accepting the compliment will help you a bit more.
So you reply with, “Of course you’d say that, nepo baby. That’s your crowd.”
“Oi!” He calls out by pointing a finger at you through the screen but eventually lets his expression change from scornful to smug, “You’re just jealous.”
You’re so glad your makeup artist decides to come up to you and start your skin prep then because, as she delicately rubs a moisturiser on your skin, you can look even more unbothered when you reply, “Sure I am.”
You fall silent as you’re getting pampered, your eyes closing involuntarily at the soft touches on your face, but Matty stays silent too, just fully admiring the view of your pretty and relaxed face.
He breaks the silence when a sweet, “Baby, you’re so fucking beautiful.” falls from his lips, making a big grin tug at the corner of your lips and you let your eyes open again to see your screen, only to find him staring at you with the most adoring look on his face.
“Thank you baby.” You reply wholeheartedly, making his heart rate stutter when you use the pet name on him.
Rather impatiently, he asks right away, “Can I see your dress yet?”
“Not yet.” You had purposely kept that to yourself, fully wanting his anticipation for it to build up for as long as it could. “Patience is a virtue.”
“It’s overrated.” Matty counters your words with his eyebrows raised and a look of defiance as if he’s challenging you to show him the dress. But you shake your head and all he does is sigh and change his question to, “Am I getting pictures?”
Yet, you aren’t giving in that easily, not when you can taunt him a bit more. “If I’m feeling generous…”
Something inside him ignites and how he wishes he could have you next to him in that very moment so he could kiss you until you break. “You better.”
“Or what?” You push further, biting your bottom lip withholding a smirk that wants to break on your face.
But it seems the singer has got no taste for explicitness any more, for he just shakes his head at you for being trouble and settles for saying, “You’ll see when you come back.”
You let your voice drop a little, mischief making your eyes gleam as you look at him, “Is that a threat or a promise?”
Matty smirks at your advances and lets you have this moment, winking at you when he says, “Whichever you want it to be, baby.” That spark you ignite within him comes alive and makes him desperate to have you back, so he asks somewhat breathlessly, “When’s your flight leaving?”
You have a think about your tight schedule for the day and recall, “10pm tonight so I should be at Heathrow by 5pm tomorrow.”
That sounds like the most amazing news to him and he shows you a massive grin when he realises you’re arriving, “Right after soundcheck…” meaning he can go get you.
You’re only teasing when you say, “Are you coming to pick me up?” Silently wishing he does though, because if there’s anything you’re dying to do once you get back home is hugging him again.
“‘Course I am, baby.” He clicks his tongue like he can’t believe you’re asking him about that, “D’you really think I won’t want you beside me the second we’re in the same city?”
You have to press your lips together not to show just how fucking happy his words make you, you cheeks heating up slightly and a squeaky, “Aren’t you cute!” escapes your lips.
But Matty seems too smug when he hears that and agrees with a quick, “I know, I know.”
So you snort to yourself and playfully roll your eyes, “It’s gonna be an issue with everything getting to your head.”
“Is it? Thought you loved it. It’s always been me, you wouldn’t be here now if you didn’t love it.” He loves calling you out on how long you’ve been a fan when you try to act like he’s being annoying, because there’s really nothing you can argue back with.
With a sigh, you state, “See, I’m not answering that in the slightest because you’ll find a way to have it feed your ego.”
Playing with you, he scoffs and complains, “People will hear you and think I’m a narcissist.”
His faux offended state makes you giggled, “Where did all your self awareness go? You are one.”
“Am I?” His curls bounce in his head when he looks up and to the sides as if he’s thinking about it and somehow comes to the conclusion that, “Sometimes it’s a compliment you know.”
You roll your eyes again and chat back by calling him, “Okay Mr. Big Head.” but you’re so happy on the inside that you’ve got him like this on the phone again. It feels just like the first week of the year and all those times you’ve texted before. Everything Amelia said two days before has been swept right out of your brain and you’re so fucking grateful.
You’re brought back to reality when you hear him cheekily say, “You’ve never once complained about my big head.” And with an even more suggestive tone, he adds, “Think you actually quite enjoy it, baby.”
Jaw dropped, you gasp and whisper-shout, “Shush!” at him.
Which elicits uncontrollable giggles from him that have you almost breaking and laughing along with him, “What?!” He says aloud like he’s not just said what he has said, “You’ve got your airpods in!”
And even though he’s right, you don’t let him be and scorn him, “Still!”
“Oh come on baby,” He calls your bluff act out, “I know you’re dying to say something back to that. I can see it in your face.”
Before you can even think of a response, you’re having two gold patches pressed over your under eyes as another step on your skin prep and Matty is suddenly envious of the pampering.
He also is reminiscing of you doing his skin care and he misses your touch on his skin, however innocent it could be. Like a little kid asking for a new toy, he gasps and demands, “I want those!”
And you have his jaw falling agape when you glance at him and nod, “You need them. Look at those eyebags.”
He’s fully offended, his jaw fallen and eyes empty as he can’t believe you’ve just said that, and the visual makes you laugh so hard that your patches are falling off your face so you cackles turn into a noise of subtle panic which has your makeup artist turning and scorn you for not staying still.
“S’not my fault! He’s making me laugh!” You excused yourself in between chuckles and Matty laughed even harder in your ear, making your chuckles turn into cackles again and the patches to fall down again.
You manage to catch one of the patches on the palm of your free hand, the other one hitting your thigh which was covered by your white robe.
And once again you get scorned, for which you pout trying to put the blame on Matty. That somehow ends with you being convinced to put him on speaker and you swear you have never had a funnier day getting ready for a massive event in your life.
The whole time, everyone has been laughing at Matty’s and your antics, multiple times your makeup artist has had to stop herself from starting the next step in your eye makeup because of how hard she was laughing and she was trying not to fuck up.
Eventually, when you’re miraculously ready to go and they’re waiting for you to head downstairs to leave for the red carpet, you have to say goodbye to your curly headed boy who wishes you the best of luck and admits out loud just how excited he is to have you back beside him.
You smile so hard looking at your phone and saying you feel just the same, blowing him a kiss and giving him a quick wave you hang up and when you lift your head up is that you realise the whole thing has been recorded.
“Oh right, we were filming a get ready with me.” You bite your bottom lip as your cheeks heat up and you pray at least Amelia got proper footage because you were excited to edit and post that as soon as you could.
Your manager laughs, handing you the camera so you can film yourself walking out but she shrugs, “T’was cute.”
You’re so glad you’re quickly ushered out of your room, your manager quickly following behind and there you meet Amelia to take pictures in the hallway.
That is when your nerves start hitting again, making your hands shake as you hold each other and pose for the camera. You both are mumbling pure gibberish, just trying to let it all out, doing a little Sharpay Evans looking at each other and mentally preparing yourselves for what is going to be a wonderful evening.
~*~*~*~
That red carpet had been an absolute dream.
You had managed to do the Wednesday dance with henry Winkler, have Guillermo del Toro rub your lucky egg, ask Anya Taylor-Joy and Daisy Edgar Jones for dating advice, find out Letitia Wright’s favourite tube line, meet Paul Dano, and witness Andrew flirting with Amelia like they were the only ones in the room.
Both of you are buzzing with energy by the time the carpet starts emptying out, everyone going inside the venue for it gets closer to the ceremony starting time, and you get even more of a rush when you remember this means you’re closer to setting off for the airport so you can go back to London.
You’re practically counting down the minutes when security starts letting the people into the area to start cleaning up, your gaze going over every member of the crew looking for a sign of them finally calling it up as wrapped, and this all doesn’t go unnoticed by your best friend.
Amelia knows exactly why you’re so happy and it warms her heart. After experiencing this together, seeing you doing good in other areas of your life is just what she wants but there’s that nagging feeling in the back of her head that tells her she needs to let her thoughts out before it’s too late and the damage is done.
Now, she is praying that not a single thing goes wrong and that this is where everything starts making sense for you, but she’d hate it if she let you go without advising you to be careful one last time.
So she waits a little, after you’re both congratulated and thanked by the crew for doing such a great job, so when you’re off with your manager and waiting to get picked up, Amelia grabs you by your hand and makes you turn to her.
“Y/N,” She starts with a tone of her voice that has you just knowing exactly what this is so you clearly tense up in front of her. “We didn’t really have the time to continue speaking about it yesterday but I wanted to tell you just before you leave: please be careful.”
Before you are even able to tell her that you know, she continues with a worried face, “I know this is going good for you, and god do I really want this to work out for you but please, talk about it with him. Don’t let it pass any longer because that’ll only make it worse if something happens.”
Your brows furrow and you purse your lips trying to fight the upsetting feeling rising up your throat. You haven’t got a clue about what to say back, your thoughts now going back to your situation and turning everything to look for bad things about it and you hate that you do.
Just because you don’t want to show her how much her words have affected you again, you nod and squeeze her hand as a silent thank you, “I know and I will.” You say the calmest you can and just so she doesn’t get the chance to ask about it, you hug her and press a kiss on her cheek before saying, “I’ll text you when I land.”
The “Alright.” she gives you as a response is faint as it reaches your ears in between the loud noise of the city, and you’re so grateful that the cab taking you arrives right as you are handed your suitcase, your bag and another bag with clothes for you to change into in the backseat of the car.
You turn back and wave Amelia goodbye, feeling your heart get heavier when you see her face and all you can hear is her words on an excruciating loop that feels like daggers to your chest.
Once you get your case in the boot of the car and you go inside it rather hastily, you change into a pair of jeans and a shirt, throwing your precious Drive Like I Do hoodie on top and putting your gown inside the bag it had come in, your manager helping you delicately store it inside it and promising to give it back to your stylist once she gets back to the hotel after dropping you off at the airport.
You knew you were going to cut it really close with how much of a short time you had between leaving the red carpet and going to the airport, so you’re finally breathing in relief when you get to your gate only ten minutes before you start boarding.
But once your mind is free from the stress of making it in time to catch your flight, all you can seem to focus on is every word that Amelia has said about you and Matty.
And unfortunately, you overthink every sentence she uttered for the first few hours of your flight. Fully giving into your insecurities has you spiralling so much that you end up falling asleep for a max of 3 hours, only waking up when the flight attendant gently taps your shoulder to ask you which meal they had for breakfast you’d like to choose.
And after that you just can’t go back to sleep. You’re left wondering which is the best way to bring the conversation up or if you even should, scared of completely ruining things by seeming too intense about it but also, deep down, wanting to know the answer yourself.
Sighing, you go on your camera roll and pray time goes faster as you edit your pictures and prepare drafts about the Golden Globes to post on your social media as soon as you land.
~*~*~*~
Getting off the plane and being back on home soil makes you feel so much better.
It’s like seeing the gloomy weather again and the cars having the steering wheels on the correct side engulf you in a hug and the familiarity of it all settles helps the weight on your chest feel a little lighter.
As soon as you landed you texted Matty telling him you just landed and that you’d be out as soon as possible. He replied not two minutes later telling you not to rush and that he would see you at the arrivals door.
God must be looking out for you when you get off the plane because you get through security without a hitch and your suitcase is one of the first 50 to come out. You’ve never been so excited to get off a plane and back home. Usually you’re mourning your holiday but now there’s nothing more that you want to do than to get to the O2 to see the gig you’ve been waiting months for.
Walking out into the room of people waiting to pick up their loved ones, and you think it would be difficult to spot Matty but he’s sticking out like a sore thumb, and you adore him for it. He’s standing there in his jeans and Chicken Shop Date hoodie with sunglasses on a white and green cap on his head.
But when he catches sight of you, he takes your breath away when he holds up a handmade sign with ‘Baby’ written on it with a small heart next to it. He’s grinning like you’re delivering him a birthday present, and you really hold yourself back from running towards him.
You walk straight towards him, and immediately you’re brought into quite possibly the best hug you’ve ever received.
“Hi Baby.” Matty whispers in your ear after he hugs you into him tightly.
You’re been held with such a strong hold that you think Matty must believe you’ll disappear if he lets you the tiniest bit loose. But you’re not complaining, you absolutely love it.
“Hi.” You whisper back, and you feel like you could cry.
You’re sure you’ve never been held so tightly and after everything going around your head over the last few days it feels so nice for it all to go quiet and you focus on him. Being back in his arms feels heavenly, and you don’t think you’ve ever felt so content hugging someone, so much that it makes your eyes well up a little.
Your heart skips a beat when he tells you, “I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you too.” You say back, without any hesitation, but it comes out a little bit hoarse as the ball in your throat persists.
This makes Matty abandon his disguise though, he releases you from the hug, keeping close though, but he takes off his hat and sunglasses. Immediately his eyebrows are furrowed and he needs to make sure, “You okay?”
However, he can see that your eyes are a little glazed over. Not to mention you look really tired, but he still thinks you look just as gorgeous as you did last night, even if you are just in your jeans and an oversized Drive Like I Do hoodie.
“Yeah, sorry. I’m just really jetlagged.” You nod, and Matty watches you, cupping your face as if he’s checking if you’re being honest or not. And you truly are so you smile, trying to convince him, “I’m fine, I promise.”
Matty thankfully believes you, and he gently strokes his thumb across your cheek as he tells you, “I’m so proud of you, baby.”
“Stop it,” You tell him, despite it really meaning a lot to hear. “I don’t want to get upset again.”
Matty chuckles at that but he looks straight into your eyes and repeats, “I really am though, you did amazing. I’m soproud of you.”
And you can’t stop yourself from leaning in to kiss him then, because you don’t have the words to express just how much that means to you without you breaking down. Jetlag messing with your sleep really has your emotions fucked, so you just pour everything you’re feeling into a kiss.
It feels like an age since your lips have been against his, and you certainly take your time to savour it now. It’s sweet, extremely sincere and the perfect way to round off your greeting back home. Matty can certainly feel you pouring your emotions into the kiss and he loves the way your arms loop around his neck to make sure he can’t escape from it.
Not that he wants to. He would die a happy man if he were to fall here and now. He has you back and that’s all he needs. He lets the kiss arrive at its natural ending and when you pull away the both of you are grinning like fools before Matty grabs your case and says, “Let’s go baby.”
You smile and follow him, not blaming him at all when he puts the cap and sunglasses back on because you understand that he doesn’t want to be recognised and mobbed when he has a show to get to. As soon as they are on he grabs your hand and you walk in step with each other as you head to his car.
It gives you a chance to take in his hat though and you’re sure it’s the Land Rover logo but with letters missing so it just says Lover. It makes you grin as it reminds you of one of your favourite songs and it turns out it's one of Matty’s too. What makes you giggle though is when you said you liked it because of that reason he took it off himself and put it on your head.
After that you thank Matty for coming to get you as you find his car and he assures you that it’s perfectly fine. And thankfully, the both of you make it back to London's best arena with plenty of time to spare.
Getting into the O2, Matty takes you straight to their green room where the rest of the band are and you greet them all with hugs and they congratulate you on last night's success. You thank them all and you love the hug that Charli gives you.
Here is where you meet Carly, and she’s just as wonderful as you expected her to be and really welcoming. And you really had to hold back your emotions when you were introduced to baby Hann by Uncle Matty. Seeing that man with a child is not something your brain can handle today so you were almost thankful when you were all interrupted by food being delivered.
It’s calm in there while you all eat, and you love that they are having a cheeky Nandos before they go out on stage. About half an hour later though, the room starts getting busier, people coming and going and you’re greeting a few new people you’ve not met before.
Matty has to leave the room for a few minutes, as he was called away by someone in the crew and he gave your thigh a quick squeeze before smiling, telling you he would be back soon. You’re left talking to Charli who is on the settee across from yours and you’re both giggling about how there’s definitely a connection between Amelia and Andrew Garfield before your attention is pulled back to the curly haired brunette.
“Hey baby?” Matty calls you from the door he’s just slipped back through.
You turn to look at him and smile, “Yeah?”
He looks all mischievous for some reason, as he’s grinning like a lunatic. But it makes sense when he explains, “I got you another date.”
“Okay…” You trail off, waiting for the grand reveal.
And to be perfectly honest, you’re expecting the fabulous Denise Welsh to walk through the door or the wonderful Tim Healy. But no.
Instead, Matty grins and pushes the door open all the way to reveal Taylor Swift standing in the doorway.
“Fuck off.” You gasp, your eyes instantly going wide and your hand comes up to almost shield your face. You don’t know why, but they do, and your now half shaking hands come up to cover your mouth as you watch Taylor walk further into the room giggling at your reaction. You bring your hands up to cover your whole face this time when the words slip from your lips again, “No, fuck off.”
At that, all you can do is let yourself fall into the back of the settee you’re on hoping it would swallow you whole. In your head, all that’s whirring around is, this isn't happening, this isn't real.
But it really is. And everyone in the room is laughing at how shocked you are. But it's George that chuckles, “I think you broke her, Matty.”
And he certainly has. The next thing you do is peek through your fingers to see she is still very much there now standing beside Matty, both of them grinning at you. But you tell the curly haired brunette, “You can’t just present Taylor Swift to me and expect me to be alright.”
Matty just laughs loudly before gesturing for you to, “Come here.”
And you do as you’re told. More adrenaline pumping through your system right now than you think the whole of last night.
Your hands are shaking a little, but nothing you clenching your fists can’t hide when you stop in front of Taylor and smile a shy, “Hi.”
Her grin is still bright, clearly used to absurd reactions like what you’ve just done. Her american accent rings out in her, “Hi.” and she smiles like you’ve not just made a massive tit of yourself.
“Y/N, Taylor.” Matty introduces you with a big grin looking from you to the singer, but then he goes on to say, “Taylor, this is Y/N, my…” But you watch his smile falter and he hesitates. A beat passes before he ends up saying, “Girlfriend.”
Hearing that should fill you with an insane amount of joy and happiness. But from the pause he did, it felt like it was almost bitter and he was reluctant to say the word out loud.
You’re aware that you havent talked about anything and that’s more than likely why he hesitated because you don’t just introduce someone to Taylor Swift as a fuck buddy. But that hesitation you saw brings back every single doubt that Amelia filled your mind with.
Swallowing that pill, you give your attention back to the popstar, not wanting a moment like this to be ruined at all by any relationship. You’re meeting Taylor fucking Swift, the last thing you need is to be worrying over a man.
You’re about to splurt out everything under the sun about how you’ve loved her music since you discovered her, and that she soundtracked your life before The 1975 took over. But you don’t get a chance to, instead you’re left shocked to your core.
“I love your dates, they are so damn funny.” Taylor grins, and you can see she genuinely means it.
This has you entirely gobsmacked though. You deadpan, “You know who I am?”
“Yes, of course I do.” Taylor nods with a toothy grin now, “I’ve seen so many of yours and Amelia’s dates, not to mention the golden globes last night, hello. You were amazing.”
You fully gasp, beyond yourself about being in her presence and her knowing who you are on top of that, “I can’t believe you know who I am.” You’re in complete disbelief, turning to glare at Matty for a second before your gaze is back on Taylor as if you looked away from her for too long, she’d disappear. “I’ve been listening to your music since I was sixteen, and you know who I am! What fucking world am I living in?”
Taylor’s eyebrows raise and her face shows amusement like this is the funniest thing she’s seen all day so you recoil into yourself with the feeling of your cheeks heating up, “Sorry, I'm so embarrassing,” You scorn yourself catching just how over the top your reaction must be before explaining, “The last however many days feel like a fever dream.”
She clicks her tongue, waving your apology off, “Don’t apologise, you’re fine.”
So in an attempt of making less of a fool of yourself, you try your hardest to get into your Date character when you say, “Anyway, when’s 1989 Taylor’s Verison?”
The shriek of laughter that leaves Taylor’s red lips has you feeling fuzzy inside. The next few minutes you’re just going on and on about her music and in return you get some random details and stories from her that you’d never think of finding out in your life.
Taylor had just asked you which songs you’d say are a must on the set list, and after the long response you gave her, you add, “You know I was so ready to plan a trip over to the States so I could go to your tour but Ticketmaster absolutely fucked me over and I’m still on the wait list.”
“Oh yeah, sorry, that was a horrible mess.” She cringes to herself and you feel so bad when she continues with a sorrowful tone in her voice, “I didn’t mean for that to happen.”
“Of course! But you’re the Taylor Swift, it was to be expected.” You reply, matter-of-factly because you had been expecting it to be a hassle but not that much of a mess.
“Awh you’re too kind.” Taylor coos at you and reaches her hand out to give your forearm a soft squeeze before her hand comes back to her side and she sighs in forlorn, “I mean, I get that but also this new system… I really thought it would be so helpful to avoid scammers but it didn’t and on top of it all, it just made it so much worse didn’t it?”
“It really did.” You say honestly, with a soft pout. “And here I thought getting my Harry tickets had been hell enough.”
The pop star gives you a sad smile hearing that but she backtracks to what you said first, “So you still haven’t got tickets?”
You shake your head, “Unfortunately not.”
Being the absolute best, Taylor grins brightly at you and offers, “Well you’re so welcome to come over whenever you want once the tour starts.”
“Are you serious?” You can’t help your hand flying over your mouth in shock.
Taylor finds your reactions so adorable, she giggles before agreeing, “Absolutely! You can come with Matty, I’m sure he’d be down to go. Right?”
Up until that moment, Matty had stood watching you two interact and melting over how ecstatic you were to have one of your favourite artists in front of you. You were practically gleaming with happiness and that made him feel elated.
You had fully forgotten he was there, completely taken by the situation you were in and when you turned to see him as he said, “‘Course. Wouldn’t miss it for the world.” with a wink aimed at Taylor, you felt your stomach flip inside you.
You scorn yourself mentally, feeling so stupid to subconsciously react that way but Taylor playfully adds, “Plus, there’s nothing better than crashing one of your friend’s gigs is there?” with a smirk took you back to the moment you were in.
The three of you laugh, you know she’s clearly referring to herself and what she’s doing there but then Matty corrects her by saying she wasn’t crashing the gig, but making it even better, earning giggles from Taylor and a sweet thank you.
“So I’ll expect you sometime later this year.” Taylor says, looking at you expectantly.
And despite not knowing if attending with Matty would even be possible in the future, you still give her the biggest smile and the most heartfelt, “Thank you for that.”
“My pleasure, Y/N.” The blonde says and it feels like the end of the conversation so you turn to Matty in slight panic and he saves you by starting another conversation up.
Though this time, it feels more like they’re talking with each other and you’re just merely a spectator. Laughing when they laugh is all you get in, and watching them avidly exchange words has your insecurities rising back up. You thought your imposter syndrome couldn’t get any higher than it did last night but it certainly feels just as prominent again now.
In your head, they start to make sense the more minutes pass. They get each other in so many ways. They make music, they get what it’s like growing up famous, the aches of not having privacy, the torturous cycle of record, drop an album and tour, and repeat.
And as they go on and on, you find yourself comparing your life to Taylor’s and how you’ll never truly be able to understand what it’s like for him. You’re new to all of this in general, and you already feel imposter syndrome at all the events you're invited to, but this makes you feel like a fish out of water. Your mind jumps to the ultimate conclusion that Matty would be much better off with someone like her. Someone on his level, someone in his league.
You’re silently suffering every second that goes by and it gets harder to laugh at Matty’s jokes with the growing knot in your throat. So, trying your hardest to sound normal, you excuse yourself to go get yourself a drink and you barely wait for their responses when you’re off.
Water is what you stick to, not wanting to add alcohol into the whirlwind of emotions you’re currently feeling just in case it would worsen it up. And you definitely didn’t need that when it’s your supposed official first outing as Matty’s girlfriend.
You down a full cup of cold water like you’d been stuck in the desert for a whole week and you’re pouring yourself another one when you feel a pair of arms wrapping around your waist from behind. Those familiar curls come to tickle your skin when Matty hides his face in your neck and presses kisses to your skin there.
A smile breaks on your face slowly, allowing yourself to enjoy the moment but then you raise your head back up, hold your water filled cup, and you catch a glimpse of Ross talking to Taylor this time, people orbiting around subtly waiting for their turn to get a minute of the pop star’s attention and your insecurities can’t be held back any longer.
“Girlfriend?” You ask Matty, and the word leaves a bitter taste in your mouth, like you’re waiting for him to inevitably try to softly take it back.
He giggles, loving hearing that word tied to you, and he pecks your neck once more before nonchalantly replying, “Yeah, well, If you want to be?” He only words it like that just so you don’t feel suffocated if it’s not what you want, but god does he want to call you that every chance he gets from now on.
The fluttery feeling it gives him disappears completely when you let your voice drop almost entirely and he can barely hear you when you mumble, “I think it’s more do you want to settle for me?”
“Woah,” Matty’s grip on you loosens immediately and he moves to the side to see your face. And when he sees that you’re deadly serious he grabs your hand and instructs, “Come here.”
The curly haired man pulls you in the direction of the hallway, out of the big green room and into the next room which is also theirs but has only a few members of their crew chatting together and writing some stuff down.
Matty knocks on the halfway open door and asks, “Can we have the room please?” his worry entirely written on his face so everyone nods eagerly and they quickly get their things to leave. “Thanks.”
As you’re both waiting for people to clear the room, you can feel his thumb stroking the back of your hand as he holds it and you wish that helped everything you were currently feeling. But it doesn’t. It just makes you think that you’re about to lose it, lose this, and that after this conversation you probably won’t ever experience it again.
The second the last person is out and they’ve closed the door behind them, Matty steps around you to face you and grabs your hands, “What do you mean ‘settle’ for you? Do you really think being with you is settling?”
He hopes that his touch is enough to help you feel better but it’s clear this is much more than a small concern when you shrug and admit, “Yeah. To be entirely honest, yeah, because you could do so much better.”
His jaw drops slightly, his heart sinking to the pits of his stomach and his hold becomes stronger as he almost begs for you to be joking, “Please, please tell me you’re winding me up because that couldn’t be further from the truth.”
The knot in your throat tightens and you know if you even try to open your mouth, all that will come up is a stupid cry so you stay silent, letting your eyes drop from his in embarrassment. You feel even worse when he dips his head, trying to get you to look at him and his voice goes quiet when he asks, “Do you not want this?”
His words were laced with such sorrow that it kicks you in the gut and makes you look up, shaking your head eagerly to deny that, “I- no, I do,” You clear up the quickest you can but you think it’s best if you just say your thoughts aloud so you let your insecurities fall from your lips, “But you could be with someone like Ta-”
“Don’t say that.” Matty stops you hastily. He pulls you in by your hands, letting them drop so his hold is now on your waist and he stares right into your eyes to tell you, “Don’t compare yourself to other people when we’re talking about us.”
You’re about to tell him that you can’t help yourself, not when even your best friend can see it being possible, but he beats you to it as he reassures you further, “I want to be with you, okay? I’m the one massively punching here and I can’t believe you think that being with you is anywhere near settling because it’s not.”
Your brows furrow and the corners of your lips drop when you fight his argument with a sad tone in your voice, “You are not the one punching.”
But Matty won’t let that thought continue to be a thing inside your mind because it couldn't be further from the truth, “I am.” He reassures you again and brings one of his hands up to cup your jaw.
“Baby, you’re breaking my heart.” His eyes are looking straight into yours, begging for you to drop all of it, for you to stop believing yourself and start abiding by what he’s telling you to be the truth.
It’s hard though, when all that you can think of is him regretting his decision of ever having something with you because he realises he could have anyone he could’ve ever wanted. You don’t want to be a waste of time for him.
There’s no way you could embarrass yourself any further now so you let your thoughts freely fall out of your mouth, “I just don’t want you to feel like you've wasted your time ever being with me when you could have someone so much better.”
You can barely get the last word out before a sob rips through you and all he can think of doing is crush you into a hug, because his words don’t seem to be helping at all. His heart breaks feeling you shake in his arms, the collar of his shirt getting wet from your tears and they burn his skin like cigarettes being put out on him.
Matty just lets you cry it out, dropping kisses on top of your head as you do, rubbing one of his hands up and down your back and telling you that, “You’re fine.”
There’s a small moment of clarity when you realise just what you’re doing and you pull back to aggressively wipe your tears as you curse under your breath, “For fucks sake, I’m sick of crying. Jet lag is doing me so dirty.”
Something clicks when you say that, his hands slowly going down your sides until they settle on your hips again and, pouting, he asks you for confirmation, “This is why you were upset when you were away too, isn’t it?”
But your quick, “No.” is not convincing to him, despite it being the truth so he says, “Baby.” sternly under his breath because he just wants you to continue being open with him, so you can work it out.
And you give him just that, sighing and retelling what had happened, “Amelia said something and it just got to me because I’d been awake like thirty hours. I didn’t-,” You cut your own rambling before your voice breaks again and inhale deeply to continue, “I didn’t want to think about what this was when I was meant to be hosting the fucking Golden Globes, but then you hesitated before and it brought it all back.”
The way your chest heaves as you’re trying to swallow a sob has Matty holding back from becoming visibly upset himself, forcing himself not to tear up because he wants to remain calm for you.
Softly, he starts explaining just what happened before, “I only hesitated because I don’t know if that’s what you even wanted.” He stops, trying to think of a better way to put it because he didn’t want to sound like an arsehole, “I know I asked you at that party and I was serious about it but I didn’t know if you remembered because we hadn’t talked about it since. I didn’t know whether you just wanted to fuck for a while and then leave it as friends.”
Your chin wobbles after hearing him and all you can think of doing is admitting, “I don’t want to be your friend.”
Taking the chance to make a joke so he lightens up your mood, he flashes you a sad smile as he finishes the lyric, “You want me to kiss your neck?”
And thankfully that has you snorting, “You’re a dickhead.” You tell him, fighting a smile entirely a product of amusement, and recoil into yourself when you proceed to admit, “But yeah I do.”
He lets you breathe, seeing you start to calm down. Your incessant tears and heart wrenching sobs are exchanged for bloodshot eyes and sniffling, and it’s when he feels you relax under his touch that he pleads, “Can we make this official then please?”
“You actually want that?” You know you’re being quite annoying with your lack of confidence but after having had all of those thoughts spinning around your head for such a long time, you feel like you need every bit of reassurance you can get.
His wholehearted faith in himself when he nods and says, “More than anything.” make you want to cry all over again, and the feeling only gets stronger when he continues on praising you, “I’ve told you I’m obsessed with you. I don’t wanna let you go. Struggled for the last few days baby, it’s been awful.”
You can’t help your eyes filling up with tears again, seeing Matty all blurry in front of you through them, your pout reappearing on your face.
Matty swears seeing you upset is one of the worst aches he’s felt, so he almost begs you to reply with a yes when he says, “Those better be happy tears.”
“They are.” You nod, pursing your lips when a few stubborn tears fall down your cheeks, and you repeat, “They are.” just to assure him you’re feeling fine now, “Sorry you know when you sometimes just need a cry.”
That he truly understands, but god does it hurt watching you get so upset over something you really shouldn’t. And he knows it’s all in your head, so there isn’t anything else he’d rather do than help you overcome moments like it.
“Come here.” Matty pulls you in again, his arms around your waist and yours snaking around his middle. He feels you nuzzling into his neck, completely melting in his embrace, and it feels so fucking nice to have you like this again.
The distance these few days have brought between you has been enough for him to know for certain that he wants something with you, so he can’t let more time go by without asking again, “So you’ll be my girlfriend?”
Perhaps is rather fucked up of your brain to bring on more obstacles that you can think of but you try to lighten it up by turning your brand new aching thought into a bit of a joke, so you lean back and look him in the eye before you carefully ask, “You won't get upset about me having to flirt with people for a living?”
Yet, Matty is so sure in his answer that he doesn’t even take another second to say, “Nope. Can talk about it more later if you want. I know it’s early on but you know when you can feel something is right? And I don’t want to waste any time with you, I’m all in. I really want to see where this could go.”
You feel every atom in your body melt at his words, a gleam in his eyes as he takes in every inch of your face and his heart starts beating faster in his chest when you smile brightly at him and give him a hint of a nod, “I want that too.”
Right then, he knows deep down that it’s a moment he’d live to remember. Maybe it’s wishful thinking, but he hopes that the feelings bottled up inside the both of you meant that this between you would go on for far longer than the two of you could ever expect.
“Then it's settled, girlfriend.” That smirk you love so much makes an appearance and it somehow settles it all for you.
Now feeling more playful, you can’t pass on the opportunity to egg him on so you try your luck, “If I'm your girlfriend can you do something for me?”
His curiosity has him nodding almost instantly, “‘Course.”
But you watch him clearly deflate and give you a sarcastic roll of his eyes when your petition is for him to, “Play Antichrist.”
Narrowing his eyes at you, he leans in until you feel his lips brushing yours and he teases you by saying, “Some things not even girlfriends get the privilege of.”
“Then please put out the ubiquitass version of The 1975. Please.” You bargain this time, pulling back slightly so he doesn’t have the chance to avoid answering by sealing your lips together.
You’re actually surprised when he tilts his head to the side and smiles widely at you, “We might have another version of Being Funny somewhere.” He trails off mysteriously and your jaw drops.
“Is it coming soon? Are you actually putting it out? Are there more songs?” Your questions spill past your lips in a rush, eyes wide in intrigue.
But Matty leans into you and his lips brush against yours again when he lowers his voice to say, “I can’t say.” His eyes dropping from yours to look down at your lips, lets you know he’s about to kiss you so you don’t have the chance to dig for more information.
Not giving in, you lean backwards ever so slightly, creating a bit of distance between you before you just state, “Rude.”
And he fights that back by reminding you, “I just got you a date with Taylor Swift.”
Your eyes go wide when you remember that has happened only a few minutes before and you giggle in disbelief, words failing you entirely then.
So Matty softly chuckles at you and wraps his right arm around your waist to pull you impossibly close to him and he mutters, “Come here.” before cupping your jaw and pressing his lips on yours.
His hold on you is tight yet delicate, strong enough for you to know that he wants you as close as he can have you and his mouth moving on yours so passionately, you’re willing to give up oxygen entirely and forever if it meant feeling the way you do when he kisses you like this.
You reciprocate, arms going around his shoulders and one of your hands going up his neck until your fingers tangle in the hair at the nape of it. Pulling on it, he moans softly and you happily swallow that sound.
Both of you smile so hard into the kiss then, that it’s fully broken and, breathlessly, he pulls back just enough to watch your face and use his words to say what he was trying to express with that kiss, “I’m obsessed with you baby. You’re not allowed to forget.”
Entirely driven by your emotional state, your brows furrow again and you’re starting to pout when he lets a breathy laugh out that hits your lips and he reminds you, “No more crying.”
Using your nails to scratch lightly at his scalp where your fingers are, you let your pout turn into an attempt of a playful smile, “Well you better not do half your set then because I will be crying in the pit.”
The thought of you being upset again, even if it just was because of his music, has Matty needing to comfort you and to tell you how much he means it when he says he adores you, but he knows that if he keeps talking, you’ll cry again so his solution is to kiss you one more time.
His lips are plush against yours, moving so sweetly and patiently with yours like he’s just signed a lifetime away to dedicate merely to kissing you. Like he now has all the time in the world to feel you like this so he won’t rush it anymore, he’s now entirely focused on enjoying every second he gets you this way.
His fingers on your waist clutch you tighter, his fingers pressing into your skin make for a new familiarity brewing that makes you sigh in content into the kiss. Your lips open and he takes the silent invitation for his tongue to come into your mouth.
Humming in bliss, you both take your time taking each other in, breathing heavily through your noses and willing this to last as long as you can until there’s a moment when you remember everything that has happened these past few days and you have to break the kiss since you start feeling emotional again.
You’re not going to cry anymore or at least that’s what you’re trying not to do, closing your eyes for a fair few seconds with your forehead pressed to his and noses bumping in such proximity.
You sigh but smile, opening your eyes to look into his and whispering right against his lips, “I’m obsessed with you too.”
His nose rubs against yours in a eskimo kiss and you see the corners of his eyes wrinkling as he smiles and whispers back, “Are you okay?”
You nod, grinning to yourself when you feel his unruly curls brushing your forehead, tickling you in a way you’re growing to love, “Yeah, I think I just need a super long sleep to get me back in working order.”
Matty playfully snorts and rolls his eyes, “Absolute Grandma.” and he has you back to giggling with him how he’s used to.
“Know me so well.” You laugh, nodding in confirmation.
The singer kisses you once more before he pulls you into another big hug, and it lasts a long time. You only now realise how just how much you need it, everything feels like it did before, like all is at peace when you’re being held against him so tight.
Your curly haired brunette can’t stop himself from reiterating, “I missed you so much.”
“I missed you too.” You hum, closing your eyes and squeezing him that bit tighter.
You just spend a solid few minutes hugging each other and gently talking, Matty making sure to rub up and down your back and do anything to make you that little bit less emotional. He can’t believe his lucky stars though.
You’re his girlfriend. Even when he thinks about you officially having that title a smile comes to his lips. He’s so enamoured by you, he’s so happy you even want to be with him in the first place, he can’t wait to let himself get a little more romantic with you.
Another minute passes by before your little conversation is interrupted by a knock on the door followed by someone calling, “Matty?”
“Give us a minute.” Matty calls back, not wanting this moment with you to end just yet.
But unfortunately the singer hears his guitar tech inform him, “Your Mum’s here mate, she’s currently got Taylor Swift in about five pictures.”
Hearing that makes you giggle in his arms, picturing it with ease and you can practically feel Matty cringing at the thought. But he doesn’t break your moment, he just shouts back, “Be there in a sec.”
You feel a kiss on the top of your head and he releases a content sigh as he rubs up and down your back. And you give him another tight squeeze before you release your hold on him and pull back a little so you can look up at him.
He softly smiles at you, seeing that your eyes are still a little puffy from you getting upset. But you just look so damn cute to him. Looking all smiley with his merch on and you’re in his arms and you’re his girlfriend. He’s never been so happy.
“Are you okay?” Matty asks as he cups your face again, and he smiles when you lean into his palm a little as he gently strokes your cheek, “Do you wanna wait here for a minute?”
The singer is in no rush to go and see his Mum. Especially now because he’s nervous to introduce you to her. Not because you wouldn’t like each other but because he knows his Mum is very full on.
“No, it’s okay.” You shake your head, you’re feeling very composed again now thankfully. But you do need to ask, “Do I look like I’ve been crying?”
“A little bit, yeah.” Matty tells you honestly as he moves a loose strand of hair out of your face.
You pout and sigh, “Shit.”
He’s softly smiling at you though and he laughs at you scorning yourself before he shushes you when he continues, “Still very pretty though, so don’t worry.”
Your tip twitches at that and it takes a lot in you not to call him out on it and deny his compliment. Instead, you bite your tongue and appreciate what he’s said with a smile, but you do chuckle anxiously, “Your Mum’s going to think I’m a headcase.”
“My Mum already loves you.” Matty assures you.
Because the amount of times after your date first aired that he heard Denise say things like, ‘You should ask her out properly Matt… Someone like that would be good for you... You need to put yourself out there again and a girl like her would be lovely.’
Not to mention when you released the ‘Spicy Edition’ of your date a few weeks later, Matty got a FaceTime from her then quite seriously demanding, ‘You need to get a grip and hurry up and ask that chicken shop date girl out before someone else finds out how wonderful she is… I just replied to her story saying how amazing she looked at those GQ Awards and bless her, she replied saying ‘Just trying to look as good as you do on Loose Women’... I love her Matt. Ask her out before you come round for dinner one day and she's already sat at our table.’
Little did Denise know that he already had full intentions to go on another date with you. But her incessant pestering just meant that he wanted to keep you out of her mind so she didn’t put you off.
You chuckle but shake your head, “You’re too nice.”
“Just telling you the truth.” Matty assures you, “She’s going to be over the moon.”
That makes your heart swell and you can only hope she does like you. You’ve looked up to her for years, even before you knew about Matty.
“Lets not keep the UK’s Kris Jenner waiting.” You grin and slip your hand into his so you can encourage him to find his Mum and say hello.
Matty kisses you once more before you both leave the room and you can’t help but notice the stark contrast to how you felt entering the room to now leaving it. You can’t believe you’re somebody’s girlfriend again, Matty’s especially. If you think about it for too long though, you’ll get too emotional again so you try not to think about just how lucky you are just yet. You’ve got inlaws to meet.
You both hear her before you see her, she was asking the guy who must have been the one to knock on the door a little earlier asking, “You said he was this way?... Lincoln, come on, he’s this way. Let's go say hello to my son who can’t be bothered to greet me.”
Matty makes you chuckle when he groans about his Mum, “I don’t know how he puts up with her.”
“Leave her alone.” You shake your head, knowing he’s just being dramatic over it, more than likely because he’s nervous to introduce you.
But Matty persists, “You’ll be begging her to do that to you after tonight.”
You’re about to tell him that you really won’t when Denise comes around the corner and all of you stop to greet each other. It seems the Loose Woman hasn’t seen you just yet because she just reaches out to her son to embrace him, “Oh Matty, there you are.”
“Hiya Mum.” Matty says, and you let his hand slip from yours so he can return her big hug.
“Hi darling,” Denise gives her son a squeeze but when she sees from over his shoulder that you are just behind him, her eyes go wide and she exclaims, “Oh, it's you!” and Matty is let free from the hug and all of her attention moves to you as she excitedly grins, “You’re his chicken nugget date girl!”
This makes you laugh instantly, loving that she remembers you from your date with her son, but the mis-titling of it is hilarious. Gosh, you already love Denise Welsh so much, and you have a feeling once you get to know her, you’ll love her even more.
“How many times have I told you that she has a name and it’s Y/N?” Matty scolds her, shaking his head, but you’ve taken no offence to it at all.
She can call you Matty’s chicken nugget girl for the rest of time and you’d be happy with it. Not to mention, forever entertained.
“Sorry pet, I didn’t mean to be rude.” She smiles and she offers you a hug which of course you accept.
“It’s okay.” You assure her, giving her a squeeze before taking a step back and Matty slips his arm around you.
“Mum,” Matty says as he rubs his hand up and down your side comfortingly, and he looks at you as he introduces you properly, “This is Y/N, my girlfriend.”
Matty looks so proud to say it, and to say it confidently. He wishes he would have said it confidently earlier and avoided your upset but it’s a conversation that needed to happen and he has no doubt he’d be talking to Taylor with you again. He will be sure to state it louder and prouder then.
“Oh thank god you asked her out.” Relief can be heard in the actress’ voice and you’re listening to her as she starts to say, “I’ve been going on at him since your date telling him to-”
But then she clearly looks at you a little bit closer and she interrupts herself, wanting to make sure you’re alright, “Oh love, are you okay? Why’d you look all upset?”
You’re about to tell her about your travels and your lack of sleep dramatically affecting how you regulate your emotions, but Denise assumes before you can tell her.
She looks at her son, almost giving him a death glare as she accuses, “What have you said Matthew?” and before either you can defend him or him himself, she looks to you and asks, “Has he upset you being all gobby?”
“Me?” Matty asks, wide eyed and offended, “Woman, you’re the gobshite of the family, I’m not the Loose Woman.”
At that Denise rolls her eyes scorningly before her expression softens and she looks back at you full of concern. But you make a point to assure her and get Matty out of the doghouse.
“No, nothing, he’s fine,” You promise her, smiling as you say, “I’m just really jet lagged and it’s making me unusually emotional.”
Matty raises his eyebrows, “See, eat your words now Mum.”
“Shut up Matthew.” Denise scolds him, waving him off before looking at you, still concerned and repeats herself, “Are you sure you’re okay, pet?”
“Yeah, my head’s just everywhere tonight.” You nod, giving her a smile, “I promise, I’m really happy.”
Matty pulls you into his side a little more at that and you let yourself indulge in it and lean in. And you can’t help your smile getting bigger when you feel him kiss the top of your head again, and his actions have his Mum’s heart aching seeing her son so happy again.
“Awe look at you both, such a gorgeous couple.” She coos, grinning at the scene in front of her, but when your smile gets bigger she can't help but add looking straight at you, “And you’re really pretty.”
“God, don’t make me cry again.” You say, feeling your eyes well up again, and you fan your eyes with the one that isn’t wrapped around your boyfriend.
Denise steps forward to gently grab your hand, “No, hunny.”
“Sorry,” You smile, blinking to try and make the tears dissipate, “A lack of sleep really doesn’t agree with me.”
“Don’t we know it.” Matty grins.
You fake a glare and nudge him, “Shut up you.” but this has Denise in stitches.
“Oh, you’re going to fit in the family so well.” The actress grins, and she can tell just from the small interactions she’s seen between you that you really mean a lot to him and that he really likes you. She’s so happy he’s made the effort with you, she knows how badly he needs someone like you in his life, so she grins, “Someone to keep him in check.”
After chatting a little more, you get introduced to her husband Lincoln and his little brother Louis and you’re pleased that they all seem to like you. All of you end up back in the green room where you find new but familiar faces. And you’re grinning once more when you watch Denise hug Flo before both you and Matty get your turn with her.
Matty gets to her first though and grins, “Heya Wheels.”
She smiles back at him, greeting him with a tight hug, “Hey Curly, where’s Y/N/N?”
Her question reaches your ears just as you reach her side and you greet her with an enthusiastic, “Hi Flo.”
She turns around to hug you this time but he smile entirely falls when she sees you face and before you could even open your arms to embrace her, she’s whipping her head back to face Matty and almost hisses through her teeth when she says, “What the fuck have you done?”
“I’ve not done anything.” Your boyfriend raises his hands up in sign of innocence but Flo doesn’t buy it one bit.
“Has he done something to make you upset?” She grabs your hands as she asks with a frown on her face.
You can’t help but giggle, heart warming at her concern for your state but you shake your head and smile at her to settle down her worries, “No no, I'm just really jetlagged and I keep crying. I promise everythings fine.”
You watch as her face softens and her hand rests on her chest while she lets out a long exhale, “Oh thank god,” she starts, turning back to Matty with an accusing finger pointing at him, “Because I was gonna fight you, making the most gorgeous woman in the world cry. You’re lucky I didn't instantly slap you.”
You pout at her words, not accepting the compliment at all, “You’re too kind.”
But she doesn’t allow you to do that, she reiterates her point by saying, “No, just telling the truth, gorgeous.” and winking at you, which has you giggling as your cheeks heat up.
“Florence Turner, you can’t flirt with George and my girlfriend, pick one.” Matty scoffs, but then changes his words for a better scolding, “Better yet, pick your husband and baby daddy.”
Never has Flo been happier than to hear that the curly haired brunette has finally secured his girl. If she wasn’t in the mood to tease, she would be jumping up and down congratulating them.
“Baby daddy’s back on tour.” Flo smirks before wrapping her arm around your waist and telling Matty, “So I'm going to do more than just flirt with your girlfriend, don't you worry.”
You feel yourself get flustered by that sentence alone, but when she brings her other hand up to shield her lips from Matty as she whispers into your ear, you feel your mouth go dry. All Matty can do is watch as his best friend whispers something that makes you look away from him and start getting more flustered.
Flo drops her hand and moves back a little, enough to look at you knowingly and ask loud enough for Matty to hear this time, “How about it?”
“Sounds like fun.” You just about manage to force yourself to say and your lack of composure has Flo smirking.
She looks from you to Matty, and your boyfriend’s face being concerned yet desperate to know what was said makes it all the more rewarding.
Flo makes her exit then, turning around in the direction of her cousin to steal baby Hann’s attention for a bit, giving you two a little wave, accompanied by a mischievous grin on her face.
Taking your hand again, Matty asks, “What was that then?”
And despite how much what Flo told you has left you speechless, you try your best to change your expression for a taunting smirk and tut at your boyfriend, “That’s for me and Mrs Turner to know.”
“I’ll tell Alex.” Matty threatens loosely, with his eyebrows raising and eyes going wide as if he was entirely serious.
So you fully dare him to do it, intentionally making it seem like something else was said, “Tell him, I think he’d enjoy what she has planned.”
That bluff leaves him speechless and of course because he cannot live with being left with some intrigue, he’s trying to get it out of you the whole time until he and the lads are called up to go on stage.
At this point you get told to stick with Flo and you’re both given O2 wristbands and you both follow Jamie down to the floor where you see that glorious bat signal that reads ‘The 1975’. It makes you emotional, it hitting you again just how long you’ve waited to see this show, and before you even get to the sound desk where Flo is going to be staying, you tell her that you’re just going to head into the pit.
She offers to join you but you don’t think it would be wise for her in a place where all of the fans in here will know who she is, especially when she’s also carrying precious cargo. So after her telling you to meet you back at the desk before the last song ends, you disappear off into the sea of people.
You’re pathetically emotional throughout the whole set, mostly the first half of it though. You were tearing up as Matty started playing the piano and when each of the boys walked out on stage, as if you’re not shagging the man singing and have been with all of them for hours.
But suddenly it’s not anyone you know personally up on stage anymore. It's your favourite band, your boys, The 1975. And you get lost in the music.
It’s all a little much for you. Sincerity Is Scary, Fallingforyou, and all of the slower songs off the new album have you in tears. And when they reach About You and Carly comes out you’re absolutely done for. You’re crying the whole way through and your throat hurts with the way you shout Carly's lines back at her.
But then Taylor comes out and you lose it again even though you were half expecting the intrusion with the way they were talking earlier. Hearing Anti-Hero’s live debut was amazing and hearing her sing The City, which is still one of your favourites, has you crying again.
You dance and cry your way through the At Their Very Best section of the show, again losing your composure during Robbers. Although, Matty does make you laugh when he says, “I’m not kissing anyone in front of Taylor Swift. In front of the queen? Have some respect.”
He chuckles to himself after that, and he adds after a beat, “And I've got myself a missus remember? No more kisses for you lot.”
Everyone starts screaming hearing that, and it has you chuckling to yourself. Watching Matty you see him looking at the people near the barrier and he moves back to the microphone to correct them, “No, you're not about to get The Birthday Party.”
There’s a mumble of defeated chatter then, until Matty grins and tells the room of 20,000 people, “I’m just getting laid.”
Screams fill the room, but you just elect to die from the embarrassment despite only a handful knowing it's you. Your cheeks go stupidly hot and you genuinely hide into your hands for a second silently screaming, not believing he said that.
He moves on, telling everyone, “Now back to something a little more depressing.” and Somebody Else is queued in.
The rest of the set seems to fly by after that, and before you know it Give Yourself A Try is about to finish and you’re watching in awe as the band waves to everyone who came to see them and it hits you square in the chest when you see just how happy Matty is as he’s waving to everyone.
When they turn off the power at the lamppost and the room erupts once more, you get lost in the sea of people. You just give yourself a second in your spot, taking everything in, thrilled to bits with the show and it was everything you wanted and more.
Turns out this was a bad thing to do, because you get a few people recognising you, which turns into a lot of people recognising you. You don’t mind taking pictures or saying hello to anyone but after the 25th one, you don't really see a way out of your predicament.
You should have gone back to the sound desk a song early like Flo said. But no, you got caught up in the moment seeing your favourite band. You’re in a lot more videos and selfies over the next few minutes until thankfully a security guard recognises you and comes over to help and the crowd around you starts dissipating, finally leaving the floor.
The room is practically empty when you look around it now, most of the people have already vacated and the sound desk is empty and you’re a little bit stuck for what to do until you’re escorted by that steward to the thankfully another security guard that you recognise and you ask him to radio Mark or someone who can confirm who you are.
When you finally get back to the green room, the room is buzzing, and it’s Flo who finds you and hugs you first apologising that she left the room without you as she couldn’t spot you. Denise then gets to you and you chat about how good the show was until your eyes land on a freshly showered Matty entering the room again.
He’s in joggers and his chicken shop date hoodie now and he looks so adorable you could cry again. But it’s just when his lips find yours again and his arms find home around your waist, you feel so overwhelmed by everything you just wish you could escape from everyone and it be just the two of you again.
After telling him how proud you are of him and how amazing the set was, he can clearly see you’ve been crying and asks how you are. Once he’s certain you’re alright you end up congratulating the other boys and you have another longer chat with Taylor.
She’s certainly everything you hoped for and more. She promises you a chicken shop date and tickets to the eras tour and you think January 12th 2023 might just be the best day of your life.
The excitement to watch the gig tonight had clearly been all that was fueling you so a little later when Ross asks Matty if you and him are coming to the after party, you decline straight away.
You tell your boyfriend that you’ll be alright going back home alone because you are dying to shower and get in bed, but Matty refuses to leave your side so he tells Ross he’s skipping tonight and that you two will be seeing him tomorrow.
The bassist smirks when that happens, biting his tongue not to call Matty a simp because it was certainly weird of him to skip an after gig party.
You make sure to hug everyone goodbye, feeling so incredibly happy to be in the presence of all these people yet so sad to see the day ending already. For a second you consider if you could go a bit further, maybe a couple hours at the after party but when you’re hugging Carly goodbye and your eyes struggle to stay open, you know you can’t.
Going home with Matty was making you giddy though. You’re buzzing inside even though your eyes are half lidded and your steps are clumsy. Matty has his fingers intertwined with yours and he guides you with giggles through the venue and out to get into one of the many private cars Jamie had organised.
It’s no surprise you fall asleep with your head on your boyfriend’s shoulder on the drive back to what you realise it’s his house when he softly wakes you. When he unlocks his door and lets you go in first, you smile brightly to yourself at the memories that come when you see his concrete walls.
“Is it weird I’ve missed your concrete bunker?” You ask with a loopy tone in your voice, eliciting a string of giggles out of him that make your heart swell in your chest.
Thankfully, you had left a copious amount of clothes at his place before you left for LA because he had gone a bit overboard about how much clothes you needed to take back to his during that first week of the month.
So you shower as quickly as you can, already dreaming of resting your head in the plush pillows and letting your eyes close, and once you get out, he watches as you languidly try your best to quickly get in one of his big tops and dry your hair before finally getting in bed.
“I missed you so much baby.” Matty whispers into your neck as he kisses your skin softly and pulls you closer to him.
You hum in utter bliss, feeling so complete being cuddled into him and hearing him reiterate that he missed you makes your insides flip.
“I missed you too.” You reply yet again but not any less honestly.
But you’re drifting off rapidly so you don’t get to hear what he says next which is, “I adore you.” and before you fully let yourself fall into slumber, you reply with a mumble of gibberish that has him giggling before he falls silent and just watches you drift away in well needed rest.
~*~*~*~
Matty allows himself to sleep in the next morning, knowing he doesn’t have anywhere to attend to until past noon so he can spend the whole morning clutching you and getting the sleep you two so desperately need.
But that backfires when you’re both woken up to Matty’s phone going off incessantly and when he groggily answers, he curses under his breath and apologises quickly, promising he’ll be there as soon as he can and when you reach out for your phone, you see the time and it all makes sense.
It’s only about an hour and a half until soundcheck and you are still in bed.
Despite his freshly made promise, Matty doesn’t make the effort to actually get out of bed, instead he lets his phone drop on his night table and scoots closer to you, nuzzling his face in the back of your neck and kissing every inch of your skin there.
“Baby, we need to go.” You remind him as you struggle to turn around in his hold.
Matty groans into your neck, like he’s refusing to listen to you but you tangle your fingers into his curls and pull on his hair so he can see you but the reiteration of your words die in your throat when he lets out a low moan at your action.
Your jaw falls a bit at the sound and he giggles in response, dipping his head to kiss you feverishly, moaning again when you let your lips part and your tongues meet.
Before it can go further, because you can feel his hands starting to roam, you take the role of being the responsible one and break the kiss, standing up from bed and forcing him to follow suit.
The wave of incoming messages that flood Matty’s phone the more minutes go by are what rush you two getting ready for the day and after a bit over an hour and a half, because Matty forced you to have breakfast calmly with him, you’re standing right in the middle of the barricade, watching your favourite band - or better said, your boyfriend’s band - soundchecking for a second sold out show at the O2.
It’s mesmerising seeing them work their magic on stage even if it’s just a soundcheck. Them playing around and laughing aloud but also being meticulous of every little detail sounding just how they want it to, has you leaning into the barrier with your forearms and stare at them all with an incredible sense of pride.
And, of course, you’re stuck staring at every move Matty makes. From the way his fingers run up and down the neck of his guitar, to the way he nods slowly as he hears the bass and the guitar in his in-ears, how he mumbles to himself as they go along and the winks he gives you whenever he turns to look at you.
Matty is also making sure to explain at the best of his ability just how he wants the interludes to go today, because he wants a different thing to happen at this show and you’re fully invested in every direction he gives everyone and how he’s laying it all to be. You can’t wait to see it on the actual show.
You had thought it was impossible, but you find yourself growing more and more entranced by him as the day goes by and in the greenroom, where you all are now after soundcheck had finished, you realise how most of the time you’re stuck mindlessly glancing at him as he engages in conversation with the lads.
That’s until your phone vibrates with a message. One from Amelia that says, On my way to the arena! Can’t wait to see you! xx that somehow gets you nervous.
It’s not that you feel like she’s going to take this in a negative way but you fear that she sees something you can’t and it once again pops the bubble you are in.
So you’re shifting in your seat and fiddling with your fingers the whole time after that text. Matty notices and he rests his hand on your knee, tracing circles on your skin and he leans in to whisper, “Are you okay?”
You could only nod and because you know he’ll get why you feel this way, you tell him, “Amelia is on her way.”
And just like you thought he would, he gives you a sweet smile before leaving a string of chaste pecks on your lips before he softly promises you, “It’s gonna be okay.”
You feel a bit foolish when your best friend arrives and she traps you in a tight hug as she says loudly, “Why’d you leave me early, I missed you on the plane next to me bitch!”
And when Matty chats back to that with, “Play nice, that’s my girlfriend you’re talking to Dimz.” the loud screech Amelia lets out makes you wince and laugh loudly.
Her face is priceless, a wave of surprise, disbelief and pure happiness for you as she leans back to see you in a way of silently asking for confirmation and when you nod, she screeches again and pulls you in for an even tighter embrace.
“Your Tumblr dreams came true!” Amelia yells as if that was a good way to congratulate you and you hear the room breaking out in laughter behind you.
Amelia greets everyone in the room after that and the night continues but you’re so relieved when she takes a minute to pull you aside and wholeheartedly say she’s so beyond happy for you, that it was about damn time someone wasn’t blind to how amazing you were and cheekily adding that she knows Matty is the one for you.
Emphasising heavily on ‘the one’ which she knows you get exactly what she’s playing at but you’re quickly glaring at her and hissing through your teeth at her to keep her mouth shut. Because you’re not about to get your boyfriend scared off over a fanfic you wrote years ago about him coincidentally called, ‘The One’.
When you both go back into the conversation everyone’s having, Matty making you sit on his lap and wrapping his arm around your waist, you feel so warm inside because it feels like you’re part of this little family and you truly don’t know when it was that you got so damn lucky.
And in a further rush of luck, you and Amelia get a message on the group chat you two have with your manager that intriguingly just reads, Need you two in a call with me urgently in two minutes x
You look at each other with a frown and you show the message to your boyfriend so he can loosen up his hold on you as you excuse yourself out of the room, at the same time as Amelia does.
Out of everything that you were expecting, which wasn’t much, you weren’t expecting the fucking insane proposition you got to which you both said yes instantly.
Coming back into the room ten minutes later was weirdly grounding after the fever-dream-like situation that had just happened, and it shows in both your faces just how insane that call had been.
The whole room goes silent as they see you walk in, clutching Amelia’s hands for dear life and your faces are twisted in the most amusing expression of surprise.
“What happened?” Matty asks almost desperately, Amelia and you are moving like sloths and your eyes are so wide they look about to pop out of your heads.
Amelia stutters when she tries to speak first, making everyone even more confused but then in a rush of adrenaline, you manage to interrupt her gibberish by announcing, “We’ve just been asked to host the Oscars after party for Vanity Fair.”
It doesn’t feel real you saying it, but what is real are the gasps and cheers you hear in the room. It’s only a mere second before every sense of yours is taken over by Matty running to hug you and Amelia, almost throwing the three of you on the ground in the process.
“Congratulations!” is all you hear around for the next ten minutes, everyone asking about how that had happened and it’s when you and Amelia start narrating how the call had gone that it hits you and you get a bit emotional.
But your tears are stopped when Charli comes over to crush you two in a hug and saying, “I got invited to it and was gonna say no, ‘cause like I don’t like anyone there but now that you’re going then… Might as well party together.”
Amelia squeals just at the same time as you do to the news and the three of you hug again, already fucking buzzing for what that night will be like. George being the best, brings shots to celebrate and it feels like the party has started even before the show has gone.
You hug your best friend when you get her alone for a bit and you tell her that you love her with your whole heart, leaving a loud kiss on her cheeks and squeezing her so tight in a hug she’s giggling uncontrollably.
All that you feel at the moment is like your dreams have ultimately come true and that makes you feel completely unstoppable.
So when the guys eventually go on stage, and you and Amelia run for your life to get to your seats, you’re living every second of the gig like it’s the last you’ll ever attend.
There’s a different feeling brewing inside you as the songs go and you see Matty doing his usual antics on stage, but your mind short circuits when Amelia leans in just as the band is doing their synchronised side step dance at the end of I’m In Love With You - which had melted you completely at how fucking happy Matty looked on stage - and she says, “That’s literally your boyfriend on stage.”
You understand the reference so quickly and you cackle out loud, making some people turn to look at you for laughing in that moment but you pay them no attention because you turn to your best friend and gasp shortly, “It actually is!”
Every emotion you feel during the gig is amped by a thousand percent and that’s why by the end of it, you let yourself desperately run back to the greenroom and crash Matty into a dizzying needy kiss when you find him right outside the room.
“Take it, it was a good set then?” Matty lets out a breathy laugh as he rhetorically asks, that feels warm against your parted lips when he breaks the kiss.
And you don’t even have it in your heart to be embarrassed so you nod eagerly, your fingers running through his curls and your eyes are taking every detail of his face. “As usual, baby.” You reply breathlessly, you just can’t believe your luck and it all wants to come pouring out of you so you pounce on his lips again and he responds with a soft groan and wraps his arms around your waist to hold you closer to him.
The kiss is broken early this time by your lovely best friend finally making it back, since you made the run alone a few minutes ago and left her behind, and calling you out when she sees you getting off with your boyfriend.
“Oi! There’s a kid present, you animals.”
You know she’s referring to Ross’s niece who’s inside the greenroom with everyone else, but the girl can’t see you and Matty outside so you flip Amelia off before she enters the room and she cackles as she reciprocates the action.
Matty giggles and kisses your cheek and then lets his kisses wander downwards until he’s leaving a wet kiss on your collarbone and you bite your lip to silence a soft moan.
“What’s gotten into you baby?” He asks with a smirk, but before you can answer, he adds, “Not that I don’t love it, I really fucking do. All of this. But I’m surprised, what did I do?”
Your teeth still have your bottom lip trapped so when the corners of your lips lift into a smirk, you look rather mischievous and something inside him flips. The feeling only gets stronger when you whisper, “Be my boyfriend.” and steal one last kiss out of him.
You could stay the whole night just kissing him then, but this time you’re both not missing the after party so once everyone is ready to leave, you’re walking out of the venue and getting crammed into a private car with Matty, Amelia, George, Charli, and Jamie en route to The Standard Hotel.
When you get there, you’re surprised by a little crowd of paparazzi that blind you with their intense flashes even from outside the cars, but it’s when you see those flashes that you realise that for yours and Matty’s privacy’s sake, you can’t be seen going in with him at all. Even if he does have more people in the entourage in the cars behind you, you can’t risk it.
So it’s decided at that point, The main four of them who would be expected in a car together would be getting out and you and your best friend would be looping around the block to come in with other less important people.
Matty quickly kisses and apologises before getting out but he tells you that he will wait for you just further into the reception of the building. Away from any prying eyes or camera lenses.
It takes 10 minutes waiting in the queue of cars to get back to the drop off point, and when you step out Amelia and you hold hands as thankfully less flashes go off, capturing you and your best friend. You know then that you’re going to have to leave with your best friend later as well just so the nosey bunch couldn’t ruin the novelty of your fresh relationship with Matty.
“Fucking hate them.” Your curly haired brunette mutters when he finally can wrap his arm around your waist and pull you to him when you’re all inside the lift.
You hum in agreement, “I know.” and you smile when he quickly leans in to peck your lips.
When the lift doors open and you walk into the big suite, where the music is already making the walls shake and the people inside talk louder than normal, you’re so relieved you don’t really have to hold back in there.
“We don’t have to hide here though.” You say into his ear, your arms wrapped around his neck and he looks at you with a smirk.
His eyes fall to your mouth and you tease him by running your tongue over your bottom lip, you hear him groan deeply before he’s attacking your lips hungrily, just like you wanted him to. You’re cupping his jaw, keeping him in the kiss and when you deepen it, all your inhibitions are out of the window. Your mouth opens to greet his tongue and you let out a loud moan when it presses against yours.
You’re kissing so hard, you both grow breathless rather quickly. “Baby, if you keep kissing me like that we’re not going to make it fifteen minutes in here.” Matty warns you, and it makes you giggle.
You lean up to him, letting your lips rest against his ear before you say, “Maybe that's what I’m hoping for.” and your jaw drops the tiniest bit to bite that slutty hoop of his, giving it a gentle tug before you pull away, letting your lust filled eyes linger on your curly haired brunette before you make you leave him in his place and make your way over to the bar to get yourself a drink.
Matty groans seeing you walk away from him after just doing that. You’re arse looking so good in that tight leather mini skirt you changed into before his set. No one backstage would have to bet that you were all Matty was thinking about during the consumption interlude tonight.
Little do they know he thinks about you every night he does it, and he has done for months. Ever since the first day he first let his hand slip into his boxers at the thought of you on the American tour, all he can think about is you.
Matty’s on you like a rash for the rest of the night. His hands linger on you every chance he can when someone's eyes aren’t on the two of you. His best opportunity is when you’re dancing with him, and when he turns you around and pulls you back against him, his hands are on your thighs running up and down until he lets his touch go further inside your thighs and you welcome it by pressing your hands over his and guiding him to continue.
His hot breath is on your neck, right below your ear and it makes you sway your hips even more intently so your arse is purposely rubbing on his cock, which you feel hardening the longer you dance.
It gets to a point his breathing grows erratic, from how hard he is and how badly he just wants to take you in the middle of the room if you wanted it, so his right hand comes up to wrap around your neck and turn your face towards him so he can seal the moment with a feverish kiss.
Your lips clashing as you continue to grind on him make you both go insane and you smile so hard to yourself when his chest is heaving against your back as he pulls back and with a husky voice, he suggests into your ear, “Let’s find somewhere to go.”
Matty turns you around by your waist, groaning at the loss of friction when your arse isn’t pressed against him anymore, and intertwines your fingers to look for a place you can sneak away to so you can freely continue what you had started.
You stumble into the bar first though and a drink sounds tempting after your activities on the dancefloor have left your mouth dry. There’s a wide selection to choose from and your mind is still so dizzy from every touch and every movement of your bodies that you’re unable to choose something to drink.
Ribbons decorate the complimentary bottles of champagne that the hotel has put out for everyone, and when Matty pulls you over to crack open another bottle, you giggle when it starts bubbling over and he lifts it to neck it straight from the bottle. Matty giggles too, and he pulls you by your waist so you're pressed against him and he leans the bottle up so he can pour some into your mouth. You do this with ease, swallowing the first few mouthfuls of it before the bubbles get too much and it overflows and the liquid trickles down from your mouth to your neck and chest.
The shine it gives your skin accentuates the way the corset you're wearing is holding you in. And Matty can’t help but dip his head and clean up the line of alcohol that has ran right down your breast bone and disappeared between your cleavage. You have to hold in a moan when he licks the stripe up from your boobs to your neck, and when he pulls back with the biggest grin ever, he loves seeing that spark of lust in your eyes again.
Matty just gets more ideas though because when he puts the bottle back down, he spots the ribbon tied around it again, and he can’t help himself. He takes the material off the bottle, and he guides it around the back of your neck, both ends on the front which he ties delicately into a little bow.
But you’re having too much fun watching him react to your teasing, so you lean into his ear to softly ask for it to be “A bit tighter please,” batting your eyelashes at him when you stand back straight and you have to bite your bottom lip to stop yourself from smirking.
You definitely fail because Matty looks at you entirely overcome by lust but also a certain sternness from knowing that you know exactly what you’re doing.
“Is that tight enough baby?” He asks you after he’s pulled on the bow to tighten the ribbon around your neck a bit and you nod, your bottom still caught in your teeth, so your answer is a hum which sounds almost like a whine.
Matty is done for after that, clutching your hand tight as he goes to find the nearest place you can both hide into so you can carry on what you’re doing, and the first door he’s able to find open to show a massive bathroom that looks just well enough to try and alleviate the tension that you’re both feeling.
He pulls you inside as he turns on the light and quickly closes the door, crashing his lips against yours and pushing you right against the door. One of his legs goes in between yours, making you open them up for him as he attacks your lips, the hand he’s not using to cup your jaw goes down until it’s brushing against your thigh and it starts an agonising path until it disappears under your skirt.
He is the one teasing you now, his fingers tracing the edges of your underwear and missing your centre just to make you beg for it. You have to stop kissing him, mouth agape as your breath leaves you and you’re holding back a moan when the ghost of his touch brushes over your aching clit.
You’re wet and he knows it even if he had barely grazed you and he’s about to run a teasing finger over your clothed cunt to make you more desperate when someone starts knocking incessantly on the door, making you jolt in Matty’s arms.
Holding your breath as if that would make the person leave, you stand there frozen in his arms, waiting for the knocking to stop so he can finally touch you but whoever is behind the door is very adamant on going in the bathroom because they keep knocking without a break until you and Matty are sighing in utter defeat and you have to turn around, turn off the light and open the door for the person to come in.
They must’ve been in a rush because they don’t even acknowledge you two and the door slams shut after you’re out.
You feel hot everywhere, your heart racing in your chest and your clothes feeling too constrictive already, lips plump and you suppose, your lipstick gone. Matty is sweating slightly, curls starting to stick to his forehead, lips swollen and wet and his heart also hammering in his chest.
Being the one to lead the way this time, you turn a corner into an area you hadn’t bothered to check yet and you find a room just by the end of a small hallway. Instantly, excitement rises up your stomach and trying to be quick, you open the door and fully drag Matty inside with you.
The room is spacious and it has a massive king size bed in the middle but it’s weirdly covered in a bunch of different coats and bags thrown over. You don’t even give it a second to mind because there’s some free space on the bed and you’re walking to sit on it as fast as you can, pulling Matty to stand in front of you.
Your boyfriend gets flashbacks to the night after your date, when you asked him to fuck your mouth and from the sparkle in your eye, he knows you’re thinking the same as him. He gets impossibly harder when you palm him through his trousers, looking up at him through your lashes and letting your mouth hang open as he moans at your touch.
His belt is the first thing you take care of after he lets a shaky moan like he’s going to cum in his boxers if you keep that up and you’re too horny to let a drop of him go to waste so with agile fingers you’re undoing his belt and the button of his trousers is next.
You’re halfway done pulling the zip down, catching a glimpse of the white waistband of his Calvins when the doorknob starts rattling, startling you both. You can hear people attempting to get inside the room, a muffled loud conversation and more rattling that’s soon replaced with knocking that just about drives you insane.
Giving your boyfriend an apologetic look, you let your hands fall to your sides and push yourself up from the bed. Leaving a sweet short kiss on his lips as his hands are getting him decent again.
There’s a pained expression on his face when he’s tucking himself behind the waistband of the Calvins so his hard on isn’t obvious and you feel so bad for him but you can’t help find the situation a bit comedic. A giggle falls from your lips and when he glares at you for it, you press your lips together and raise your hands up acting like that wasn’t you.
His senses are in overdrive. He’s painfully hard, he’s too hot in his clothes, his throat is dry and his head is threatening to start hurting from how the people outside the room won’t stop fucking knocking on the door.
Matty huffs when he’s done, stepping forward until he can grab your hand and you are once again taking the lead.
When you open the door, you’re greeted by a group of four people whose frowns drop when they see you and one of them asks, “They told us we could leave our stuff here?”
You have no idea if that’s true, you’re guessing it is from the amount of things over the bed so you just shrug and open the door further for them to walk in, and thankfully, they’re so distracted to just leave their stuff as quickly as they can so they can go out into the party that they don’t even notice a miserable Matty right behind you.
There’s not a sight of another room after you leave that one so you’re both left to resign your mission and just keep to enjoying the party.
“Why don’t we just get a room?” He suggests with an air of defeat looming around him that you can’t help but find amusing.
“I actually do wanna party tonight.” You’re chatting back easily, trying to see for the first time how much you can push his buttons.
And when his face falls in despair, as he tries to fight back, “But-” you know you want to keep this up for as long as you can just to see at which point he could break.
“Plus there’s paparazzi outside,” You add a second excuse, “Don’t you think the receptionist would love a good tip off for the information of you and I getting a separate room?”
It wasn’t like you didn’t want it to continue, you really fucking did, but seeing this frustrated side of him was rather interesting and what was better than finding out more about your boyfriend.
Therefore all throughout the night you’re trying to steer him closer and closer to the point where he can’t have it any more. Either by dancing suggestively with Amelia and Charli as you stare right at him or making a show of ‘accidentally’ spilling some of your drink so you can wipe it with your thumb and sucking it clean.
It’s almost 3 in the morning when you pout at the sight of your boyfriend perched on a loveseat with a frown on his face and a drink in his hand. You go up to him with feign innocence, trying to act like you’re feeling bad for him and ask what’s going on as if you don’t know you’re the one orchestrating it all.
“What’s wrong?” You ask him, pout still comically dragging the corners of your lips down and popping your bottom lip for him to stare at.
With a hand coming to brush the curls falling on his forehead back, you wait until your touch relaxes him enough to offer you a hum in return and that’s when you purposely tug on his hair, shifting on his lap at the same time so he jolts at the friction lighting up a spark he had let die an hour ago.
His arm wraps around your waist instantly, not allowing you to move in the slightest and you find him glaring up at you with dark eyes. A giggle manages to escape your lips, followed by a not at all heartfelt, “Whoops.” that he doesn’t find amusing at all.
Matty doesn’t let his gaze falter on you, and you’re growing hot under it so in a further attempt to make it worse for him, you try to shift on his lap again but his hold gets tighter when he anticipates your action.
“Come on, let's go home.” Matty whispers in your ear, his sense of urgency showing when he subtly lifts his hips up as he straightens in his seat, his fingers digging into the skin of your waist that shows in between your skirt and your top.
“Okay.” You smile and spring up from his lap almost childishly, your feet already moving away from him and in the direction of your best friend.
Your boyfriend reaches out for your hand, clutching your wrist so he stops you in your tracks, “Where you going?”
“I’m going to have to go out with Amelia.” You explain quickly, your brows raising as if to remind him of the situation outside with the paparazzi.
He finally stands up, his chest coming to press against your arm as he leans in to say in your ear, “Didn’t know you were embarrassed to be seen with me baby.”
You fully roll your eyes at him and scoff, “Yeah so embarrassed, like you haven't been glued to my side all night.”
Quickly, Matty finds the words to bite back, “Like you’ve not been trying to suck my dick all night.”
But you know you have the last word when you quip back, “Like you’ve not been begging me to. Such a shame for you baby.” and he’s completely silent. You shrug and sigh victoriously and continue with your explanation, “Anyway, you know we have to go separate or we’ll never get a second's peace.”
Bless him though, he knows just how shit it is that you’re put in this type of situation so he pecks your cheek and you feel his heavy sigh against your skin, “I know baby, I just don't wanna leave you to get hounded by them.”
“I’ve got Ames, I’ll be okay.” You reassure him, cupping his jaw to leave a quick chaste kiss on his lips.
But before you can leave his side to get your best friend, he’s flashing you a smile and asking “You wanna get some food before we go?” as a tempting little bargain.
And that is how you, Matty, Amelia, Charli, and George find yourselves in Leader Chicken which is a 5 minute car journey away. You and Amelia left first, having that chicken shop in mind to go to and you ordered yourself a chicken burger meal and Amelia a chicken nugget meal.
5 minutes later the shop door opens again and your boyfriend, Charli, and George walk in and it turns a little rowdy. Matty tries to steal some of your burger which you elbow him away from you for doing. He asks, “Thought you exclusively ate nuggets in these places? Give me a bite.”
“I eat nuggets on dates because it doesn’t scream fuck me when I’m shoving a burger in my mouth, does it?” You frown at him, thinking that was a silly thing to suggest and a very invalid reason to give him some of your food.
Matty cocks his head a little to the side and tells you, “It didn’t scream that when you were eating nuggets to be honest.”
You frown properly at him hearing that, and you're more offended by that considering you thought he looked great on your first date. “Well, why did it when you were eating them then, you slut.”
“Don’t call me a slut with company around baby.” Matty whispers in your ear.
“Don't get your hopes up for anything now after that comment big boy.” You pat his arse twice before you move to stand with your best mate and Charli, taking a bite of your burger as you go.
George laughs at the way Matty’s face drops hearing that and the drummer wraps his arm around his best mate's neck and both of them start pissing about and laughing as they wait for the food. Once the other 3 have their food, the both of you split into different cars this time.
You and Matty drop Amelia off at her flat where Zoe comes out to collect her drunk sister and the food you ordered for her. After hugging your best friend goodbye, you spend the drive back to Matty’s house laughing and talking about the gig and the night but it’s something of a relief when you make it back inside Matty’s home.
The moment you’re inside you slip your shoes off and the concrete beneath your feet is a lovely cool sensation after you’ve been on your feet all day. Matty does the same before he picks you and you tell him to go and sit down and that you will get the both of you a drink.
When you walk into the lounge after getting the both of you a glass of water and you smile when you see your curly haired brunette. Matty has sat himself down on the settee, head backwards resting on the back of it, his eyes closed enjoying the silence around him. His legs are open and his arms come to rest down by his side, telling you that he really just plopped down on the settee with absolutely no intention of moving just yet.
Coming around to see him, you put your drinks down as you ask him, “Are you alright?” and you take a seat on him, straddling his lap, and bringing your hands up to his face so your touch can sooth him.
“Just tired.” Matty tells you, his eyes opening again so he can smile at you looking all stunning on his lap.
How the hell he’s managed to get you to be his is unreal. Never has he had better luck in his life.
And he makes sure he will never take that for granted. Your sweetness radiates when you smile so genuinely at him as you say, “You did great today, I’m so proud of you.”
“Thank you darling.” Matty smiles, feeling so beyond happy and thankful he gets to call you his girlfriend now for however long you’ll have him. “Proud of you too.”
“What for?” You frown, not quite understanding. You’ve done nothing with your day but be by his side.
Matty chuckles a little at your lapse in memory, “You’re going to be hosting the Oscars after party. I’m beyond proud of you.”
“Oh shit,” You gasp, then laugh as you say, “How the fuck did I forget?”
“Big night for you, you saw your boyfriend on stage.” Matty plays a little, “Easily done.”
Of course you play along, “That’s it. Thank you for reminding me.”
You lean down then, only intending to peck his lips but as soon as they make contact you remember how good he’s been, and how much he’s probably aching for some relief even if his hard on has dissipated somewhat now. So you let your lips linger on his, pulling away to graze his before kissing him sweetly again.
All the while, your hands run slowly up his chest until you find the buttons of his shirt and once the first comes undone, the rest easily follow. Matty accepts all of your kisses as he tries his best not to smirk against your lips, but when you get more than halfway done undoing his shirt he can’t help but ask to tease, “What you doing baby?”
You kiss him again until you’re finished and pull the sides of it open, exposing his chest to you where you see your favourite tattoos. Your hands come to cup both of his cheeks, deepening the kiss this time and making your boyfriend moan against your lips, and you let your hands fall to his neck and slowly down his chest.
Only breaking your kiss to explain, “You always do this yourself,” You’re looking into Matty’s eyes as your one of your hands slip down his lower stomach, the other running back up to cup the back of his neck and when you continue in a sultry tone, “Think it’s about time someone else did it for you.”
As you pull him back into another searing kiss, you let your hand fully descend between both of your bodies and grab his crotch which has him moaning into your kiss.
Your fingers clutch tight around his hardening cock as you palm him over his trousers, and he’s a mess of whimpers and moans the more you continue until you decide he feels heavy enough under your fingers to go on. Swallowing a loud moan that slips past his lips by messily kissing him, you find yourself growing impatient to make him feel good so it’s you the one who breaks the kiss, but leaving him with a teasing tug of his bottom lip that you briefly catch between your teeth.
“Fuck.” Matty groans loudly at that, and he can feel your smirk on his skin as you kiss down his jaw and down to his neck.
You leave wet open mouthed kisses to his skin as you move up to his ear and smugly tell him, “If you ask nicely, I might.” and before he can backchat, you bite and tug on that slutty hoop earring of his which has his dick twitching and sharply inhaling.
He grasps your thighs tighter, “Baby, please.” and this time his fingers move higher up your skirt until they can dig into the flesh of your arse and make you hum in pleasure at the clear sign of his need for anything at this point.
Tugging at the zip of your skirt, you can tell he’s being completely driven by lust and it makes you chuckle in excitement, but you push his hands away in a silent instruction not to do what he’s not been told. Having this much power over him right now makes you feel giddy. “Want me to make you feel good baby?” You ask, moving back up so you can kiss his lips again.
“Yes.” He pleads, the desperation clear in his voice now because not being able to touch you adds so much more to it and it slightly pains him.
You smile at him, giving his dick one final squeeze as you lift yourself up from him entirely. His hands feel entirely lost without holding you now, but the feeling is clouded by the need of your touch on him again.
As soon as you grab a pillow from just beside him and put it on the floor by your feet, Matty’s heart rate goes through the roof. He can’t fucking wait, he’s been dreaming about having your lips wrapped around his cock again, you always look so heavenly when you do and christ the way you take him is so good. He can’t wait, his hips buck upwards as if he’s already imagining it all.
Still standing, you lean down over him, doing nothing to hide your smirk when you notice him glancing longingly at the way your cleavage is on full display for him. But his eyes close when your lips take up his again, and when he comes to cup the back of your neck, you don’t let him get too attached.
Instead you start your descent, kissing down his jaw, neck, and chest slowly. You’re dragging it out entirely but you want to kiss every last inch of him, and with his chest rising and falling faster than normal you know you’re working him up for what you have planned.
When you reach the waistband of his trousers, you have to really hold yourself back from shedding him off them and follow up with his boxers. Hunger is all that’s written in your eyes, a shadow of lust covering them in the way your pupils have dilated and almost made the colour of them disappear.
But ever since you saw that interlude tonight and the night before, you’ve got this train of thought that has been going round and round the back of your head and pushing its way to the forefront of your mind tonight. You want him to freely touch himself in front of you, moan as he fucks his own fist as a personal show for you, hear the things he says as he does so, let him run his mouth about what goes through his head whenever he does this.
In the best and briefest way you can, you tell him to do what you’re dying to see, “Tease yourself for me, give me the best view.” You sit back on your knees, giving him a look that he would be nervous to even dare defy, so he slowly lets his hands trail down his chest until it reaches the top of his trousers.
You watch as he shivers when his fingers ghost over his happy trail, letting out a shaky breath as he makes his best effort to keep his eyes on you while he does what you’ve asked him to, yet it’s hard when the look you give him makes him squirm on his seat even more.
There’s a bit of hesitation when his fingers hover over the button of his trousers, slowly undoing it but he pauses before he can get to the zip and looks at you like he’s asking for permission.
“Take them off.” You nod, not wanting the show that everyone else gets, you want the real thing and all of it.
Matty does as he’s told, unzipping his trousers almost instantly and pulling them down enough for you to take over and you let them pool at his ankles. Matty groans as he palms himself over his underwear until you look back up at him and watch as he takes his cock out.
You’re transfixed as you watch as he pumps himself a few times, spreading what precum is there before he spits into his palm so he’s not fucking a dry fist. Wet mouth falling open as he goes, soft gasps slipping past his pink lips and turning into full moans the tighter he squeezed himself.
“Good boy.” You smirk, watching as he fucks his fist, and you can’t help but press a kiss to his thigh before you lean your head on him entirely, continuing to watch.
But the simple feel of your lips on him, your touch anywhere on his body right now lights up a fire that he needs you to put out. Your fingers lightly trailing up and down his calf is even making him whimper, all he wants is your touch where he desperately needs you. He can’t find the pleasure he wants by giving it to himself as if it was just another lonely night on the road when he has you right in front of him.
He uses his breathless words to plead with you, “Y/N, please.” but his touch is still tight around himself, unable to stop when it feels so good after the whole night had gone incredibly wrong whenever you tried anything.
“You’re so pretty when you’re moaning my name baby.” You praise your boyfriend, eliciting a whimper out of him. His brows furrow and he presses his lips together as he continues, heavy exhales out his nose this time, his cheeks turning a subtle shade of pink.
“Aw,” You pout, “You getting all shy on me now Matty?” but the tone in which you asked is mocking instead of pitiful, which earns you a pained cry of pleasure on his part.
“Why are you huffing like that?” You scorn him softly, “Thought this was what you wanted.”
Shaking his head profusely, he corrects you, “Want you baby, please.” but his hand doesn’t stop and you just laugh at how needy he is.
For a minute you give in, licking your hand before coming to replace his and your jaw falls slightly when he moans loudly at the feeling of your nimble fingers wrapping around him and stroking him up and down at almost the same pace he had set for himself.
You’re fighting yourself in your head when you quicken your movements, causing him to grow louder and squirm more under you, hips bucking to meet your fist more often as the seconds go by.
But just when his breaths shorten and turn into gasps for air, you leave him swollen, red and leaking, so close to his high that it being stolen so suddenly manages to get you a surprised whimper that turns into a funny cry in despair.
“Baby why?!” He demands an answer, his hand coming to take over for you again but you pin his hands down on the settee before he can and you chuckle at him.
“Thought you liked edging.” You tease him as an answer, and it works when his eyes open wide to glare down at you.
“I like edging you.” Your boyfriend corrects, entirely unamused by your actions.
Any other complaint dies in his throat when you push yourself up from your knees to stand in front of him and lean down over him to whisper into his ear, “And I like hearing you all pathetic, begging for me to touch you.”
Something inside Matty flips when you say that, perhaps it’s the surprise mixed with the dizzying after effect of his stolen orgasm, but he’s so willing to just let you have your way with him tonight.
He wants to see more of you like this. The prospect of you being in complete control drives him mad, that’s why he cooperates instantly when you add, “And we’re going to go to your room now to continue.”
Without even a kiss to pacify him, you push yourself back to stand properly and without a look back at him, you walk away and up to his bedroom. You’re biting your lip trying to hold your smirk and laugh when you hear him seething and scrambling to get up somewhere behind you.
When you get to his room, you find it just how you both left it. The duvet is not quite neat but it's not the messiest you’ve both left it, but before you even make it to the bed, you feel arms go around you and messy kisses being left on your shoulder, leading up to your neck.
You let him have his fun for a minute, even letting his hand run down to the bottom of your skirt and when his fingers trail up the inside of your thigh you let him start teasing your clit through your already soaked underwear. Matty gets you all breathless for him, teasing you exactly where you’re throbbing for him until your head falls back onto his shoulder, giving him more skin for him to kiss.
You almost lose yourself, succumbing to the pleasure he’s instilling in you. But when he mumbles, “So wet for me baby.” you push his hand away from you.
Turning around to him, you can see the lust clear as day in those dark eyes, especially when his eyes fall to your chest. It makes you smirk again, and you make him take your clothes off. But when he steps closer, his lips connecting to your collarbone as he goes to undo your skirt, you stop his lips from touching you. You give him a silent instruction not to touch you as he takes your clothes off, and you can see it pains him to be denied the luxury.
His hands reach for the zip on your skirt first, and that falls to the floor within seconds. He looks like a man starved as he takes you in, but you turn around so he can get the clasps that are holding your corset together.
You almost laugh at how impatient he is when it doesn’t come off easily and he has to pull it together part by part as more come undone and you’re sure he’s never been happier to throw a piece of material across a room. And once he has you in just your thong, he moves to stand in front of you, eyes fixed to your body as he pulls the last of your clothing off.
You don’t let him gawk at your naked figure for too long, bossing him around has you feeling impatient and his reactions are only travelling down south to get you wetter. Your hands are on his shoulders then and you push him back so he sits at the edge of the bed. And you know it is cruel when you go down to your knees and look up at him through your lashes evidently hinting at what your next move will be but there’s no intention within you to actually let him cum this time either.
Matty gasps in slight relief when your hand wraps around him again, your finger coming up to his leaking tip to smear down his arousal and you pump him. Once, twice, three times until he whimpers and lifts his hips up to help you give him pleasure.
But as soon as you’re there, you’re gone. Hand coming to press on his thigh but he doesn’t have time to complain when, instead, you lean in and run your tongue flat up his cock from base to tip. There’s not even a chance for him to prepare himself when you just sink your mouth into him completely. You moan when he hits the back of your throat and still there, fingers clutching harshly on his thigh when you try not to gag.
Your poor boyfriend set his expectations too high after that, because he fully thinks you’ll finally let him coat your throat as he cums but you won’t and he realises that when you pull off him and you lean back onto your heels with a smirk.
“Why- Baby, please.” His hips writhe on the bed, his cock so hard its moves as he does and his muscles contract in frustration.
You raise an eyebrow at him and ask, “What? You liked that?” as if you didn’t feel him twitch in your mouth when you did so.
And you become so much more amused when his reaction is an effervescent nod, a heavy breath slipping past his parted lips and pupils dilating even more through half lidded eyes.
Your mind is purely focused on teasing him so you go again, letting him hit the back of your throat once again and this time you look up at him, bobbing your head once and rolling your eyes in pleasure as you moan around him.
Under your hand, you can feel his leg shaking slightly and by the way he throws his head back, you know he’s so close to coming undone so you let him have it one last time. One more bob of your head and you’re off him, rising to your feet and just staring down at him as he pathetically cries out in frustration.
“Y/N why?!” He calls out with his eyes closed, a deep sigh coming from him. He’d been so close, with the way your throat clenched around him when you moaned, the wetness of your mouth enveloping him and making him delirious.
Matty can’t do it anymore, so he brings his hand to wrap around himself and finish what you didn’t but your hold comes quickly around his wrist and forces him to let go because you’re not allowing him to.
“No.” You say easily, satisfied entirely when he huffs again but listens. “You’re such a cry baby, aren’t you?” Your hand cups his jaw, making him look up at you and he does with a glare that excites you because all it says is that you’re in trouble. But this time you’re in charge so you give him a pout and offer, “Do you want me?”
There’s not a split of a second where he doubts, Matty is just instantly nodding but when your fingers dig on his face, he lets out a breathless, “Yes.”
Your tongue runs over your bottom lip as a smirk grows on your face. “Good boy,” you praise with a wink and then you lean into him, until your lips are just hovering over his and finish your demands, “If you want me, then you’ll make me cum first.”
His head is spinning from the whiplash of your behaviour still, so he has a hard time trying to figure out what is it that you want him to do but when you continue to run that filthy mouth of yours, he gathers what’s on your mind.
“You love to have that tongue of yours out all the time, don’t you? Why don’t you put it to good use and make me cum all over it.”
There’s no further instruction needed, Matty just shuffles himself up the bed until his head is resting on the pillow and he’s staring at you, impatiently waiting for you to move on top of him.
“Looking a little impatient there.” His hands are unable to stay still, they struggle to find a place to rest when he’s watching you slowly kneel on the bed and crawl up to him. When you reach just beside him, you make a show of straddling him and purposely let your slick, wet cunt graze the tip of his hard cock.
Anticipating his actions, you move forward and leave him more frustrated when he pushes his hips upwards to properly feel your wetness on him. You laugh, your knees coming right beside his shoulders and not calling him out when his hands come to clutch at your thighs.
He takes a look at you and he squirms underneath you when he catches a glimpse of how drenched you are, his throat going dry at the thought of your taste. It’s written all over his face, and it makes you want to laugh even louder.
Your right hand brushes his curls back, some of them stubbornly striking to his forehead from how he’s sweating, and the feeling of your fingers is delicate compared to your continuous attempt to make him suffer but it turns when your fingers tangle in his curls and you pull harshly on his hair. He groans loudly, hips bucking up once again, and you just can’t not call him out for it.
“Eager little slut.” Is what you say before letting yourself come down and his gasp leaves him at the perfect time for he has his lips parted instantly to allow his tongue to meet your core.
The wetness of his tongue meeting your throbbing clit has you seeing stars, and when he flicks it up and down at a relentless pace, you have to hold onto the headboard with the hand that’s not tangled in his hair.
“F-fuck!” You moan out loud when he switches to wrapping his lips around your clit and sucking it harshly, your legs trembling in pleasure as that familiar heat envelopes you completely.
The vibrations of a hum he lets out as he’s still sucking make your head hang to look down at him and you smirk with a hazy mind when you find him already staring up at you. He lets your clit go and kisses it quickly before flattening his tongue again and starts lapping at you, until he points it out and pokes into you with it.
You’re mewling as he continues doing that, jaw dropped and fingers in his hair making sure to keep him right there. Not that he wants to move, no. Matty wants you to cum all over his tongue, your taste making him get impossibly harder and if he thinks too much about how it would feel to have you clenching around his cock and not his tongue, he could cum right then and there.
As his tongue fucks into you, his nose rubs on your clit deliciously causing your hips come alive and start rocking against his face. Your orgasm fastly growing and you feel that knot tightening more the faster he goes and you love the feeling of how strongly his fingers are digging into your arse and thigh.
“So good for me.” Your hips are moving erratically as the friction becomes dizzying, your words slipping past your lips easily driven by pleasure, “A good whore for me, my whore.”
Those words make him go insane, and he only thinks he has to prove to you that he indeed is your good whore, only for you. So he goes back to lapping all over you to take in all that you’re giving him until your arousal and his saliva is dripping down his chin, and then switches between sucking and flicking your clit.
This time though, he surprises you when he takes one of his hands and dips two fingers easily inside you, making you curse out loud, “Oh fuck! Matty!” when his fingers curl and press on that spot you love so much.
When he adds a third finger, you’re done for. The stretch is already making you think of how much you want to feel all of him inside you and in pure desperation for that to happen, you let yourself go.
You throw your head back and shut your eyes when a loud moan rips through you as you cum all over him. Legs shaking beside his head when he doesn't let on until you’re the one to move away from his mouth and forcing his fingers to leave you.
On wobbly knees, you let go of the headboard and his hair and manage to move down until you hover over his chest. But before you can think of what you’re doing next, you bring up his slick coated fingers up to your mouth.
A loud moan bounces off the walls when you wrap your lips around his fingers and you taste yourself. You bob your head up and down sucking them clean with your lustful eyes on him, you can barely see the brown of his eyes anymore from how blown his pupils are.
Matty should’ve anticipated your next move, mischief clear in your eyes when you let go of his digits and lean into him, and with your right hand you harshly cup his jaw enough for him to know that you're silently prompting him to open up.
He lets his tongue out, anticipation running straight down to his dick a heavy breath hitting your lips before you spit in his mouth and instruct him to, “Swallow.”
Without a hint of doubt, he follows and you smirk down at him, very pleased at his lack of backchat or complaint. You let him know just how much you’re enjoying this by praising him with a, “Good fucking slut.”
There’s a sparkle in his eye, one that invites you to have some mercy on him so lacing your word with a bit of honey, you sweetly ask him, “You like making me feel good Matty?” still breathless and mind clouded from your orgasm. But moving back down his body you can tell just how much he’s struggling now.
He desperately nods at you, “Love it baby.” and you can’t help but lean down and kiss him. You moan, tasting yourself on his tongue and Matty groans against your lips when you let yourself straddle him properly again.
He can feel how wet you are from what he’d just done to you and you start grinding yourself against him, running yourself up and down the underneath of his cock. You part from the kiss by biting and tugging hard on his lip, and both of your actions make him loudly moan.
But your words definitely have him audibly groaning when you ask him, “Want me to make the ache in your cock go away?” You let your nose brush against his in an eskimo kiss before softly asking him, “Wanna cum inside me baby?”
“Yeah.” He pleads, his hands grasping your hips encouraging you to keep moving, because he can’t take getting nothing anymore.
But you don’t let him continue moving you, instead you stop and pull back a little to ask, “Yes what?”
“Please, baby,” Sounding utterly destroyed he begs, “Please make me cum.”
Smirking, you tilt your head to the side enjoying seeing him so desperate and ask, “You think you’ve been good enough?”
“Please Y/N,” Your boyfriend almost cries, “I have, I have, please.”
“Sit up.” You instruct, pushing yourself up with a hand on his chest and only when his chest once again meets yours, do you raise yourself up to line his aching cock up with your throbbing cunt.
You’re sure Matty’s hands have never gripped you so tightly as you sink down on him, welcoming that pleasurable stretch of feeling his cock inside you again. It feels like an age since he’d been inside you, it doesn’t feel like it had only been 5 days.
Your boyfriend is considerably louder as he moans at the feeling of you wrapped around him. Just to tease, as if you didn’t moan yourself, you praise him, “You make the prettiest sounds moaning in my ear baby.” and you kiss up from his collarbone to his jaw and then a long searing kiss on his lips when you start gently rolling your hips.
Your arms wrap around his shoulders, giving you the support you need to start fucking him properly. Lifting your hips enough to drop back down on his cock and the feeling is delightful for both you and him.
Your tits bounce as you go, pebbled nipples rubbing against his chest and the feeling brings shocks of electricity to every end of your body. Your knees start to get tired, already weak after you came on his face, so you sink down completely on him and switch to rolling your hips on him.
Matty watches you intently as your face scrunches up in pleasure when you start moving that way, your clit rubs against his skin with every roll of your hips which leaves you breathless and a moaning mess.
He can feel you clenching hard around him every time he hits that spot as you move which, added to the coincidental friction on your clit, makes the furrow of his brows become deeper as he wills himself to not cum yet - he finds purchase on holding tight onto your hips just to ground himself.
“No one makes you feel this good, do they baby?” You ask through half closed eyes, the feeling of utter bliss coursing through you as you carry on moving, “I’m the only one who makes you feel this fucking good.”
Your movements are erratic now, getting lost in the motion of him hitting that spot inside you over and over and the way he’s gripping you like you might disappear. There’s no doubt in your mind that there will be bruises on your hips from the way his fingers are digging into you so tightly, and you fucking love the possessive nature to it, even though it’s still you in control.
“Just you, god just you baby.” Matty admits, his eyes closed as he tries the hardest to grasp onto the last bit of restraint he has, “Y/N please.”
“You wanna cum Matty?” You ask, and he nods and pleads pathetically, mumbling things you can’t even make out so you tell him, “Beg for it.”
“Please, baby please.” He gives in without a second thought, “Need you. You feel so good. I can’t-” He chokes out, trying his best to wait for your command, but he’s so on edge that he can’t even manage to look at you for more than a second, his head hanging as he tries to hold on.
Your hand comes to cup his jaw, guiding him so you can see him properly, “Let me see those cute little faces you make.” And just to make it a bit harder for him, you’re bouncing on his cock again.
Using your pelvic floor, you clench purposefully when you rise up off him which has Matty choking on the hot air between you. You smirk, loving seeing him like this and you continue, until you tell he can’t take it anymore, he’s holding off and you know it.
So you finally give in and tell him, “Cum for me Matty.” and you keep a steady pace and watch as he falls apart beneath you. The long, guttural moan that leaves his lips has your jaw dropping, the noise alone turning you on more than you thought was possible.
You ride out his orgasm while continuing to chase yours and it takes just a bit of attention on your clit for you to cum around him. He whimpers when your cunt flutters around him, overly sensitive after the elongated edging.
“Did so good for me baby.” You grin with hazy eyes, breathless as you come down from your high, and you cup his jaw and softly kiss him.
He kisses you back sweetly, and he prolongs it not wanting it to be over at all. His heart feels like twice its size in his chest, he wonders how he aches for you even when you’re right there in his arms, kissing him.
It seems like time slows for the kiss, but even then Matty doesn’t think it’s long enough. You’re both grinning like drunk fools in love when your noses brush over each other’s in a cute eskimo kiss before you both decide that a shower is needed.
Under the warm water, both of you don’t really let each other go. Mumbles of, “Obsessed with you.” are uttered against the others skin and it makes Matty’s heartache.
How he’s managed to get you to agree to be his girlfriend is something beyond his comprehension. Your presence in his life has changed so many of his desires in a matter of a few months, and that is still a big revelation that he continues to uncover as the days go by. Matty realises that he’s never felt this way about anyone before. No one compares to you, and he’s sure no one ever will.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
A/N: HOPE BOTH HANDS REMAINED FIRMLY ON YOUR PHONES READING THIS CHAPTER! 😂😂😂😂😂 Lolllllllllllll 💀 Yeah I think me and @-alovesreading should probably repent again for writing this lmfao. Really hope you enjoyed it! Tour comes next and its going to be interestingggggggg, what do you think is going to happen? Thanks again for reading, see you for the next one xx
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Bittersweet
Geto Suguru x Male Reader | Platonic! Guilty Gojo Satoru x Male Reader
Fandom -> Jujutsu Kaisen
Masterlist
Gojo always detest it when he had to visit you. It wasn't because he hated—a strong word, more like dislike—you, if anything, it was more out of the still immense guilt he feels in your presence.
A guiltiness which eats him up, making him a pitiful whimpering mess in the nights. Bawling his eyes out at the empty shrines, after every visit—his confidence crumbling into nothing but dust, the insecurity resurfacing again and haunting him like the phantom, dull, pain he feels in his eyes and back.
It was his fault. His damned fault that you're like this now. A mere shell of apathetic lethargy and suicidal tendencies—three tries had almost succeeded.
So yes, Gojo detests, hated it even, to visit you. He had to though, in his sole duty of being your friend—even when you once had said, he isn't anymore a friend but a stranger—and because leiri made him to do.
Trotting up the stairs to your apartment, bags in one hand and the other causally in his pant pockets—playing with the house-keys—Gojo thought what to cook for you.
Perhaps your favourite? No, no, that it is only reserved for the Sundays. A light meal then? Something with fish? Pizza or Pasta? The list is endless to choice from and giving him a headache.
Shoko had told him, in her doctoring lecturing way, to create a Meal-Plan and only cook light meals for you—easy to digest—and nothing too overall fatty and heavy.
Gojo had waved her off, nagging at her how you wouldn't be able to enjoy the goods of foods with something dumb as a "meal-plan".
In the end, Gojo admits that Shoko was indeed right. Considering the amounts of meals and dishes he had taken home for himself, giving it away to his students or the homeless or had to throw it all away. After all you couldn't eat more than, on your good days, three to four bites—till hours later you would heave it up into the toilet again.
A Meal-Plan, huh? Yeah he could do that. Megumi can help him too.
Unlocking the door, Gojo stepped in and announced his presence.
~~~
After emptying out the bags and putting away the items for now, Gojo ventured into the living room—knowing well you're in there, either sitting or laying on the couch and watching whatever is being shown in the television.
A small smile tugged at the corners of his lips, once upon seeing a half finished puzzle on the coffee table and messy toys around it.
Megumi had brought them over during his last visit, telling you; these are much better to beat boredom than some television. Next time I'll bring some books.
Gojo was glad, relieved even, that you played with it.
Crouching down in front of you, blocking the view to television with his still towering high, he takes your hand in his—greeting you with a more softer gently smile.
»Sky eyes,«
Gojo had decided long ago, when you had first muttered those words to him—in the very beginning of your mental downfall, now a in a constant state of lingering decaying—that this was your way of greeting him, how you told him that you're aware of his presence.
Gojo had once made a mistake to come with his blindfold and spooked you so much—you really had believed and still would, if he tries again, that Gojo had been some kind of intruder with evil intentions—you screamed shrill and released a upcoming hurricane of thunderstorms with your cursed energy—now particularly sealed away for your own safety.
So now, whenever Gojo comes over he wears his round shaped sunglasses from his highschool years.
»Yeah, it's me, how are you today [Nickname]?« he asked questions even when he knew he wouldn't get replies from you.
»Hungry? I will made you some nice chicken nuggets, brought the Dino-shaped this time«
Gojo was aware he babbles. He doesn't care, he rather talks nonsense to himself and your apathetic self—than listen to the constant annoying chatter of the television and the upcoming silence which would follow afterwards.
»C'mon [Name], it's bath time,« Gojo picks you up, carrying you into the bathroom and sitting you down on a stool.
He fills the bathtub, making sure the temperature was neither too hot nor cold. He adds some bubble foam to it and two toys.
Gojo undress you slowly, cautiously of your still fresh wounds—self-inflicted days ago, when a night had gotten worse again. Sitting you in the water, he washes you. Humming happily some melody, occasionally joining you in moving the toy ducks arounds.
»Quack squishy wuack«
»Yeah, wuacky quacky [Nickname], look there wants to join another ducky« he showed you the third toy duck, adding it to the water.
A squeal of joy came over your lips, looking with wide eyes at Gojo, happiness radiating off from you as you continue to play.
Gojo's lips trembles, guilt crawling up his throat again.
~~~
Nights are cruel in their own way. Leaving the thoughts spinning and setting them free. Bringing out a loneliness and feelings once deep buried down.
Gojo buried his head in his hands, slightly gripping his snow white hair—you once said to him, how his hair reminds you of the first snow—sitting at the edge of your bed.
He inhaled and exhaled deeply, breathing in a pattern of three-five-five. His thoughts are going haywire again, flaring up the guilt—which is now so thick in his throat that he couldn't swallow anymore.
He looks at you—such a peaceful expression on your face, already so deep in the blissful dreamland—moving his hand to slowly drive through your hair with his fingers, all the way down to your cheeks and caressing them.
His gaze goes to the few photo frames on your nightstand, the small nightlight illuminates only so much. One particular photo always captures his attention.
It was a photo of Geto and you, happily married with Nanako and Mimiko—when they had been around 3 years old—in your arms.
A time where you had been the uttermost happiest. Now it was in ruins, leaving you all alone.
If Gojo had been a bit stronger, if he didn't let Geto go, back then when they had argued over jujutsu sorcery's politics and their moral beliefs towards the world, had been more stubborn—than it wouldn't have ended like this.
With his best friend being dead—at fault for this was Gojo himself, he was the one who killed Geto after all—and you, who had already lost your husband and losing your daughters shortly after—till today you didn't know how they died and Gojo thanked the above that it hadn't been him who done that—who is nothing but a decaying shell forevermore.
»Ya know, [Nickname], I've decided you gonna move in with me now. So I can take even better care of you.«
That's what Geto would've wanted.
#male reader#x male reader#anime#manga#fanfiction#malereader#oneshot#jujutsu kaisen#geto suguru#gojo satoru#geto suguru x male reader#geto x male reader
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