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smallrainclouds · 3 years

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Part five of marriage AU. Sorry for being gone for so long, I'm moving rn and my dog had to go the vet so I been busy. Hope you enjoy. Part six should out later this week.. net part will have more hypnos x reader.

🌙💤💤🌙

Time passed much quickly here. Almost too fast. Weeks had passed into a full month before You knew it.

Dusa came every other day to dust and You looked forward to your chats.

The library was coming together nicely. Even though You did have to read every scroll since no one, not even Nyx knew what they held.

Nyx had been surprised by how much there was. You thought you even saw the faintest of blush on her cheeks.

"I knew I had a big collection but I didn't realize how many I've picked over the years." Nyx murmured. "I was so busy raising several children along with Zagreus once he came later with Hypnos and his brother."

You also found out that Hypnos had way more siblings, way way more than you had sisters. But you haven't quite gotten the story about why he talked only about two of his brothers.

You peeked over the scroll you were reading in hopes that maybe somehow it had gotten smaller.

The pile still loomed threatenly the corner.

You tsk when you saw it was still the same as before.

Slowly, the gods and shades of the underworld were becoming friends of sorts.

Zagreus, much like Hypnos, had also become a regular to your library. Often with questions about your former home and any advice you may have.

You knew you weren't getting the full story of why he really wanted out but all in due time.

Charon, a god that Hermes often talked about, was nerve wracking to meet at first but he warmed up quickly to You when sharing stories of Hermes.

Nyx, even as your mother in law, had become someone who You looked forward to having the chats with. The both of you talked over the scrolls and you quite enjoyed the stories of her youth, the rare times she talked about it.

And there was Dusa, Achilles (even after that embarrassing day), even Cerberus would give you a small single wag in greeting.

And so many others. They felt more… honest. Your old home had rules and politics that you were never able to quite grasp.

You never felt right at home, with a different father than all of your sisters and a different power from all of them.

But they loved you and you loved them in return.

Homesick as you were, You were embarrassed to admit there was someone else on your mind.

Hypnos.

You haven't seen Hypnos since that night he slept in your bed. Not really anyway.

He came once a day for a few minutes, made a quick comment on the library or at Zagreus if the prince was going through the scrolls when he came in. But that's it. You felt almost like a pet that Hypnos just made sure was still alive before taking off to wherever.

You blinked at the scroll as you realized that you didn't read a single word. Your mind had drifted away from the scrolls and back to Hypnos.

Again.

🌙💤💤🌙

"Do you have anything on a thing called a Bone Hydra?" Zagreus had asked one day out of the blue, his desperation was clear in his voice.

You put down your tasks list to look at him. "I know what a hydra is but what do you mean by a bone hydra?"

Zagreus slumped, "It is this horrible thing that-"

"Didn't I already tell you what you needed to do?" Hypnos interrupted. "Just don't get hit or die!" He floated to the pile and plucked some scrolls from the top.

Zagreus sighed, "I know, I know. Don't die. It doesn't help as much as you think, Hypnos."

Hypnos dropped the scrolls on the table for you. Slowly but surely the piles had been going down. However, it was helpful to have someone who can easily get to the top.

"Maybe the issue is that you're not moving fast enough." Hypnos said.

"Yes, I am sure that is exactly why, Hypnos. Thank you, all my problems are now solved." Zagreus rolled his eyes.

"Fantastic! Glad to be of service!" Hypnos laughed.

You had to cover a smile before you looked back at Zagreus.

"Zagreus, if I find anything on this bone hydra you will be the first to know." You said.

"Y/N, you're being too kind to Zagreus. Like I said, just move faster."

You laughed at Zagreus' eye roll.

"So this is where you been hiding boy." Hades stepped in the room despite being almost too tall to do.

The energy in the room changed in a way you never felt before. The sheer anger that came from both father and son made the room feel so small.

All three of you stood but it was Hypnos who moved toward you. He blocked you from Hades' sight, his smile never leaving his face. But there was a tightness to his smile. You peeked around him, eyes focused on Zagreus and his father.

Zagreus scoffed, "Oh good Father you were able find the library, would you like some help reading or -"

"Watch your mouth, boy." Hades growled. Then he turned to look directly at you and Hypnos.

You tighten your hands, hoping your nervousness won't show.

"Y/N. Correct?" Hades asked but not in a way that was a question.

You pushed past Hypnos and You ignored his look, you did tell him you couldn't hide from Hades forever.

"Yes. It is a pleasure to meet you, Master Hades."

For a moment, no one said anything.

Then finally Hades spoke, "I heard from Nix about your work on the library."

"Yes, I have some experience with libraries and thank you for the opportunity." You replied, grateful that your voice stayed calm.

"Hmm." Hades looked around the library and You wanted to hide behind Hypnos but resisted the urge.

"Father, what is it that you want?" Zagreus sighed, "Can't you tell you are making everyone uncomfortable?"

Hades' eyes snapped back to Zagreus, "Silent! Your rudeness is what makes people uncomfortable."

Without taking his eyes off his son, Hades said to You. "Y/N, you may continue your work."

"Yes sir, t-thank you." You said, your heart racing, still not convinced father and son will start fighting in the library.

You felt Hypnos' hand on your back, warm and steady, and you let out a breath you didn't realize you were holding in.

"Well!" Hypnos said cheerfully, "Y/N needs to get back to work and I know I certainly do."

Hades sighed, "Yes You do. In fact, Hypnos. I need to have a word with you. Alone."

Without waiting for Hypnos' agreement, Hades turned and walked off.

"I'm sorry about my Father." Zagreus' hands in

"No. It's fine. Went as well as it could have." You said, glad the whole event was over.

Zagreus murmured his excuses and quickly left the library.

A moment passed and you turned your head to look up at Hypnos, his hand still on your back.

"Thank you." You whispered, a blush on your cheeks.

"Oh, sure. Hades takes some getting used to." Hypnos grinned. "I've to go see what Hades wants from me."

"Are you okay with being alone with...him?" You asked. You would happily never share a room with Hades ever again, let alone a one on one meeting.

His hand moved away and you found yourself already missing the warmth.

"Of course, he loves my charming wit." Hypnos waved a hand in farewell.

You laughed and watched Hypnos floated off.

With a sigh, you fell into your chair. Not even the underworld gods were spared of politics and drama.

🌙💤💤🌙

"So- so could I ask you a question?" Dusa asked, her duster moved in quick, neat movements.

You pulled your eyes away from the new take list you made. Since the library was getting closer and closer to being done, you had thought about opening it up but there was still much to do. Also you weren't sure of the best to keep track of who borrowed what. And you still needed to ask Nix but you pushed the thoughts out.

"Of course, Dusa. Is there a scroll you're looking for?"

"Well, no. I wanted to ask… how did you and Hypnos meet? I wasn't aware he was seeing anyone let alone getting married." Dusa bit her lip, "But don't feel like you have to talk about it if you don't want to! I know it is not any of my business."

"No. No, it's fine. I didn't meet him until our wedding or at least I think so." You put down your quill. You couldn't help but feel like you met him before that but for the life of you, you couldn't remember. "It was an arranged marriage. I… I've been told he did a favor for my mother during a war, one she would have lost if not for him."

Dusa bobbed next to you, "I'm sorry. I don't know why people or gods act like their daughters are things to trade. It's like they don't even see their daughters as full people."

You blinked, surprised at Dusa's tone. But you smiled, liking the more fiery side of your friend.

"I don't know either. But at least he is kind to me. And he hasn't been pushy if you know what I mean or anything like that. It could have been worse."

"That's good!" Dusa sighed, "Hypnos and I don't exactly get along really but I'm glad to know he has been kind to you."

"You don't? Is there a reason?" You cupped your face in your hands, elbows eyes on Dusa.

Hypnos didn't talk about other people in the house, other than his mother and brother. You wanted to know more but couldn't get him to crack in the few minutes you saw him every day.

"Well I mean." Dusa paused as if trying to find the words. "He isn't mean but you can tell he doesn't care about his work. And he doesn't seem to understand why anyone else cares. He… I don't know. I'm making it sound worse than it is. I'm sorry, Y/N."

She bobbed again nervously. "He is a good guy! He and I just don't click at all."

You smiled even as a knot formed in your chest. Is that what Hades wanted with Hypnos a few weeks ago? Again you cursed yourself for not being able to get Hypnosis to talk to you.

"It's okay, Dusa. It is not a big deal."

After a few more minutes of chitchat, Dusa left, her duster still working madly.

You sat down and stared down at your list. The words might as well be scribbles for all of the sense it made to you.

With a sigh, you pushed away the papers. Why in the world do you care that Hypnos wouldn't talk to you? Or that you still didn't understand a bloody thing about the god.

Why do you care at all?

#hades hypnos #hypnos x reader #marriage au #tangled starlight

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cheelduh · 3 years

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How to get your crush to walk you to the nurse’s office (Highschool AU)

This is part 3, but it can be read alone!

Pairing: Childe x fem!reader

Warnings: Swearing, Mentions of a monster schlong, and unedited.

Parts: 1 2

Synopsis: Childe offers Lisa a shady deal to yet again sit next to you. However, all his efforts are in vain after he makes a complete fool out of himself by tripping over literally nothing because of a stupid cold. Maybe getting a cold isn’t so bad if he gets to be escorted to the nurse’s office by none other than yourself.

Note: Pure unedited crack luvs. Can’t wait for Childe rerun tmr I hope I get the ginger and the emo nun! 🥲💖

The eyes on you are suffocating, to say the least, enough for you to consider peeling a layer of your own skin off just to breathe. Every now and then, you get a teasing glance from a classmate, and you're sure you'll be an entire puddle of guts on your desk before home room even gets a chance to begin.

There's no doubt it's Signora that spread the news of your date yesterday as a means to some sick revenge. Knowing this was going to happen, you packed some salt in your backpack to cancel out all her evil. Now all you need is a chance to knuckle ball it in her face.

Fingers crossed, you pray to the archons that Childe didn't slip anything about your...brick slip yesterday. It's a good thing you weren't in a school uniform yesterday because that would've been the end of your high school life right there.

Thinking back to it, you collapse into your open hands. How could you have beaten a bunch up losers up...risking your flawless reputation for a sadistic ginger with an affinity for chaos? And worst of all, why did you care about them shit talking him in the first place?

"You okay dear? Something you want to tell me?" Lisa feigns concern, already knowing why.

With a sigh, you blink an eye open through the gap in your fingers. "Doing just fine."

"Oh it couldn't have been that bad." Her eyes shine in mischief. "I bet Childe was a real gentleman."

"He sure was." Kaeya pipes up from the back, leaning in to show you the image on his phone. It's a picture Childe took of you absolutely oblitering an ice cream cone.

You groan and slump deeper into your chair from embarrassment as Kaeya and Lisa engage in chatter, mostly revolving around your date.

Ignoring them completely, you start to ponder about Childe. Where is he? You were sure he'd be here bright and early to reminisce on your eventful date yesterday, which mostly consisted of a competition of who could win the most stall games at a local festival.

Maybe he'd even tease you about the Monoceros Caeli keychain attached to your phone. The very one he'd won for you, and the reason that started the competition in the first place.

Your cheeks warm when you fidget with said keychain, and you can't tell if the fast pace of your heart is because you're nervous to see him or because of the biology quiz you have second period.

So wrapped up in all these foreign emotions, you fail to notice the shadow that looms over you, a glittery finger guard tapping at your desk.

The student council President, Ningguang, plops down a stack of budget files on your desk during homeroom. She's gives you a light smile, and you know what's coming when you meet her alluring gaze.

"Be a dear Y/N," Ningguang smiles, tight lipped, all pretty with her hair pinned back to crown her face. "Even with all hands on deck, i'm afraid the student council's efforts will not come to ripeness concerning all of this paperwork."

This isn't the first time you've done her a favour by becoming the president's personal accountant, and it definitely isn't going to be the last.

Ningguang is powerful, with wit like no other, and you want to be able to call in a chit when the time comes.

"Of course," You reply with a smile that rivals her own. "I'll have them done by the end of the day."

"Excellent. I knew I could count on you, Y/N." She departs elegantly, probably opting to sit next to Beidou and bicker.

You're halfway on the third sheet for total income, a minute before class starts, when you're interrupted. Childe stumbles through the door quite noisily, a shitstain of a grin plastered on his face that is directed at you.

You sigh and shake your head as he approaches you. Thankfully the seat next to you is occupied by—

Shit! Where's Lisa?

Across the classroom, Lisa gives you a thumbs up with a bar of vending machine chocolate in her hand. You should've known she'd betray you yet again.

Childe slides in smoothly after bumping fists with Kaeya, and he falls short of containing his giddy nature.

"Hi Y/N." There's something weird about him today, because you're sure you haven't seen his cheeks so flushed ever. His eyes land on your phone, which is splayed on the desk, and the keychain widens his grin.

You snatch your phone and hide it in the middles of your thighs, but the damage is already done. The urge to shrink against the wall has never been as strong as it is in this moment.

"Hi." It's a miracle you haven't combusted on the spot. Is it usually this awkward? Everything went so fine yesterday, so why can't you ease into it today?

He takes that as a go ahead and instantly reaches for your hand on the table, but you retract at the speed of light.

"Don't even think about it." You're ready to connect the tip of your trainers to his bleached asshole, nose crinkled at his behaviour.

Kaeya whistles lowly, leaning forward for the HD show that is your life.

Childe's smile is sheepish as he's scratching the back of his head. "So we're not on that stage yet huh? I seriously thought you had a change of heart after you beat up those high schoolers for m—"

You muffle his statement with a hand on his mouth, and send a pointed glare to Kaeya. "You didn't hear shit."

The Captain of the skating team nods innocently, and salutes. "Yes boss."

Returning your gaze to Childe, who looks like he's having the time of his life with your small hand on his mouth, you narrow your eyes. "Stop trying to spread rumours."

He can only hum in reply, but you feel a weird pressure on your palm and—

The smug asshole kisses your palm.

You pull back your hand and wipe at your pants, full of disbelief. "Did you just??? Did you just? Kiss my hand???" Mouth twisted, you have no idea what to think.

Childe's throws his head back, and his laugh rings in your ears. You hate yourself for wavering slightly at the sound before smacking his arm. His laughs turn into coughs, probably because he may have swallowed his saliva down the wrong pipe. Charming.

Where the fuck is Zhongli? It's already been five minutes too long into homeroom.

Rolling your eyes, you opt to continue and scribble down budget numbers and add sums up or whatever you were doing earlier after Childe pipes down, choosing to admire you quietly by leaning his weight on one arm. It's enough to make you squirm, face flushed.

"Can you not?" Clicking your tongue in disapproval, you don't look up as you speak.

"If you give me a kiss, then maybe." Childe's cheeky, ridiculously so, and he points a finger at his cheek.

"I don't negotiate with terrorists." You deadpan, fingers itching to choke something or rather...someone.

Childe pouts, and then his eyes close for a second, almost as if he's exhausted when he gives you a sort of smile. With how he's leaning in so close, you can easily spot the swelling in his eyes and the paleness of his face.

For the first time today, there's no bite in your tone when you ask with a slightly raised brow. "Are you okay Childe?"

"Yeah!" He's quick to answer ecstatically, snapping out of his tired haze by straightening himself up. "Better more than ever now that I've seen you, girlie."

You blush madly, the compliment enough for you to drop your pen on the ground. It rolls over beyond your reach.

"I'll get that." Childe jumps out of his chair and you're unable to stop him as he goes to go fetch your pen like the chivalrous idiot he is. There's a slight pause in his movement, his body taking longer to process the messages his brain is sending.

He recovers from the muddle in his cognition by shaking his head, and casually goes to pick up the pen, then ends the move by falling over backwards in unconsciousness.

"Childe!" You lunge for him, managing to catch him a second prior to his ass hitting the floor with the help of Kaeya, who somehow looks like he's expected this outcome from the very start.

The entire classroom clamps up and turns to look for the root of all the commotion.

"Don't just sit there and watch!" You hiss angrily, waving them off. "Someone get Zhongli!"

Aether doesn't need to be told twice as Venti and him race down the hall together. Venti probably just to use this opportunity of sudden chaos to skip homeroom.

"Looks like a fever." The Captain accesses the situation as a small crowd forms around you two. "There's no way he didn't feel it in the morning."

"The absolute idiot." You groan at his words. "Of course he'd try to have a pissing match with a cold."

"I'm still here you know." Childe slurs, leaning into you for warmth, chest rising and falling softly. "Just a...a little sleepy. Am I dreaming angel?"

You roll your eyes, but don't make any moves to lean away from his touch. "Anyone got a water bottle?" Curling your hands around his shoulder, you shift your gaze towards the crowd.

Somebody passes you an emerald green water bottle with dandelion charms that clink against the hard plastic handle from a nearby desk. It screams stupid, but you don't have time to judge the owner.

Opening it up hastily, you're about to let Childe take a sip until it's snatched away from you at the speed of light.

"Hey what gives!" You call out to Kaeya, who inspects the bottle closely with his one eye. He then nods in affirmation as if his suspicions are confirmed.

"I wouldn't recommend it." Is all he says when he motions for you to take a whiff, which you do so reluctantly, eyes closed.

The scent hits you all it once. It's watered down vodka, except without the watering down. Tears form from the intensity.

"The goddamn bard." You choke out, and it earns you a drained chuckle from the ginger that has his head situated on your forearm.

He has half the mind to nuzzle in further, but the position is convenient enough for you to crush his skull if you wish to do so. So he refrains, albeit reluctantly.

Zhongli manages to make it in less than two minutes, sipping on a cup of steaming tea as he breaks apart the crowd to crouch down. "Is everything alright? I came as soon as I could after I made this tea. I assumed it was just another prank."

Everyone in the room shakes their head incredulously.

"Unfortunately it isn't a prank. Childe fainted briefly." You tell him politely despite the urgency, since you're whipped for all your teachers.

"I didn't faint!" Childe groans, exasperated. "Got a little dizzy s'all."

"Yeah," Kaeya cuts in to summarize the situation. "I'll be happy to take him to the nurses office with Y/N—"

Zhongli clears his throat. "You won't be going anywhere Mr.Alberich. I'm sure you have five overdue assignments in my class. Y/N here can walk him just fine." He then attempts to wink at Childe secretly like the wingman he is, but everyone in the classroom and their grandma notices.

The facepalm you do is not enough to render you brain dead.

Pinching the bridge of your nose, you sigh for the nth time today, and it's only eight thirty in the morning. "No worries, Lisa can help—"

"Sorry cutie. I'm manifesting for the biology quiz." Lisa deflects, lighting three candles on her desk unceremoniously with her eyes closed.

You don't understand why no one has confiscated her box of matches yet. This entire school is a law suit waiting to happen.

You succumb to the team effort everyone is trying so hard to display. "I guess I can go." The hall pass is already written, signed, and neatly folded into the chest pocket of your uniform. "How did you even..."

You don't even get a chance to finish before both you and Childe are whisked away to the outside of the classroom, the door shutting behind you with a slam. Your ears perk up at the sound of a lock clicking in place.

"Looks like you're stuck with me." The smug bastard still has the audacity to beam even when he's pale in the face. "Might have to hold my arm. If I fall and crack my skull—that wouldn't look too good on your record." He makes grabby hands, like a toddler.

The smile you give is unnerving, and with the speed of a snail, you manage to loop in your arm with Childe's. "Another word and let's move on to how your hospital record is going to have more than just a cracked skull."

"If you'd nurse me back to health, it'll all be worth it." The quip he sends without a beat lacks its usual goof, but it does manage to get some sort of reaction out of you.

"Whatever. Let's just get this over with."

—

Childe's busy thumbing at his phone while you pace at the foot of the bed, arms crossed with a frown etched on your features. You hope you don't look too worried, don't want to give him the wrong idea.

"Can we just get this over with?" He wails uncharacteristically from his spot on the white sheeted bed after ruling out everything he wanted to do on his phone. His hair is tousled more than usual, as a by-product of his constant restlessness.

"Shut up." You answer monotonously, arms crossed as you lean against the wall. "Let her finish her tiktok."

Barbara—the daughter of the school nurse, has her phone on the window, lip syncing and dancing to some music on beat as she films a tiktok with the utmost of important.

It's concerning that her father isn't here to tend to your needs, but apparently he's in the middle of a meeting with principle Varka. Said meeting had been going on for the past few months, but this school is devoid of logic anyways so nobody really questions anything.

"I'm literally dying here."

"Archons you're such a baby," Shaking your head, you approach his bed with a newfound annoyance. "Barbara has to create a tiktok at least once every twenty four hours or her fan club goes feral and..."

"Tries to jump off the roof as the ultimate sacrifice to her majesty." Childe sighs, and for the first time you sense his irritation. "Got it."

Just in time, Barbara finishes her cute little dance and comes over to where Childe is laying.

Childe doesn't miss the way your scowl has dissipated, and you give Barbara your undivided attention, hearts in your eyes from all the adoration. He has half the mind to call you out on it, no doubt a little jealous over how the young highschool idol can get you to show more emotion than him.

"I'm so sorry! I started those tiktoks out of mild interest but now I have an obligation to my fans." The younger apologizes profusely, getting to work almost immediately.

"No worries." Childe starts, staying still as the blonde examines him. "I'm sure it's nothing too serious. Y/N here is being dramatic, she probably just wants to spend some alone time with me."

You inhale sharply, turn to Barbara, and ask. "If I jumped out of the window right now from this floor, would it be a quick and easy death?"

The younger girl's eyes widen, and Childe stifles his snort.

"Kidding." You raise your hands up to cease her worries, and then motion towards him. "Common cold?"

"Yes," Barbara moves on and writes down something on a slip. "We'll just keep him here until his parents can pick him up."

"My parents can't pick me up." He asserts in a casual tone. "Don't call them."

"We still have to call them. If they don't come, you're to stay in this bed all day." She hands you the note, which is a viable excuse for all the classes he'll miss today. "Give this to his homeroom teacher. You'd also better get to class, your hall pass is about to expire."

"Hold up." You remark, barely paying attention to the note that you've shoved down your pocket. "I'm not leaving him here alone." There's no room for argument, your decision is firmly stated.

Childe hypes you up in his weakened state, disoriented. "You tell em girlie."

"He won't be alone." Barbara flashes you a reassuring smile. "I'll be monitoring him until his parents get here."

"No, no, you don't understand." You argue, inquiring all the doubts you have. "He's gonna try to pull some shit and I'll have to be here to stop him."

"Ease up babe." Childe tries to calm you down, despite the giddiness in his chest at the realization that you want to take care of him.

His subconscious begs him to let you stay, to let himself be doted and cared for the way he's always wanted you to, but he knows he can't let you skip class. Not when you've worked so hard and come so far. "I'll be okay for a few. You can go back to class and then visit me during break."

You bite your lips, head jumbled with all the different possibilities of how shit can hit the fan. "I can't! What if Signora shows up? She'll poison you in this weakened state to get back at me for trying to exorcise her." The hesitation in your features gives away everything.

Childe's eye twitches at the thought of Signora out of all people getting the best out of him, and also the absolute audacity you have to be calling him weak. Clearly all his efforts towards the little shows of dominance (e.g. Shoving Pallad against a locker, spraying a hefty amount of cologne on, being an asshole in general, etc.) have not bore fruit.

"You tried to exorcise her?" Barbara gasps, momentarily reminding the two of you that she's still present.

"Her evil has no bounds." Your expression is hard to read, dead serious. "I do not regret my attempt at cancelling Satan's hell spawn."

Childe himself has been cancelled hundreds of times over the span of highschool because of all his problematic traits (e.g calling Venti a twink) and it is not a pleasant experience.

Though it does give him a sense of comfort, knowing that arrogant bitch Signora is finally getting what's coming to her, even if she is one of his friends.

Serves her right for trying to Pavlov her stupid Chihuahua into biting the closest human being just by the snap of her manicured finger. As if it's persistent yapping and tendency to run in front of cars isn't enough torture to deal with on a daily basis.

Childe's yanked out of his thoughts rather forcefully at the sound of the door opening abruptly, the handle crashing into the wall, shocking Barbara's attempts to reassure you.

He knows who it is because of his top tier gaydar, dreading what's to come.

Scaramouche is a morose son of a bitch with a mean streak that hasn't been broken since he was an itty bitty shit in the fourth grade.

"I can't believe you let yourself get sick!" The navy haired boy exclaims in disbelief, doubling over with tears, clapping his hands to add on some extra effects. "Natural selection finally decided to stop pussy footing around your primate-looking ass."

You press your lips together. "Isn't he supposed to be your best friend?"

Scaramouche sputters violently, using the wall as leverage to hold himself up. "You told her I'm your best friend? Oh fuck. Oh this is good. What else did you tell her huh? That you have a monster cock?"

"First of all, you make me reconsider my opinion on the death penalty, dickhead."

Barbara is mortified. Childe continues on anyways.

"—and I do have a monster cock. But why are you so interested in my monster cock huh?"

Scaramouche scrunches his face up in disgust, amusement nothing but a distant memory. "You don't have a monster cock you plebe."

Childe has an awfully scandalized expression on his face, but smoothly enough it transitions into an unsettling grin that you're all too familiar with. "You didn't deny not being interested in my monster cock though."

It's your turn to be mortified, shaking your head at the banter that goes on back and forth.

"How did you even know he was in here? We aren't even in the same class."

Scaramouche raises a brow as if you're some sort of toddler that's babbling out a mixture of Cheerios and spit, maybe a few digested strawberries here and there. He waves his phone in front of you, "posted it on his story."

"What the—give me that!" You snatch his phone right up, staring at the screen in bewilderment.

There's a video of you doing trick shots with your tech deck on the ledge of a nearby window with a pressed expression while waiting for Barbara to finish up, captioned with: "In the nurses office rn pray for me 🙏, there's this cute girl in front of me should I ask her out?"

You check the poll and ninety five percent say yes. Scaramouche voted no. You have mixed feelings.

Shaking your head, you give Childe, who's unable to sit still, a look of pure exasperation.

Scaramouche claws his phone back from you rather harshly, the bells on his hat jingling, making it hard for you to take him seriously when he sneers your way.

"You should be thankful you're the lover of my comrade." He shivers slightly at the word comrade. "or I would have obliterated you on the spot for that little stunt."

Childe doesn't even pretend to look fazed at the older's threat when he says "as if I'd allow a kumquat headass like you to touch my girl."

You and Barbara hastily jump in to stop the bloodbath that is seconds from happening. "No!"

Luckily, no limbs are teared apart.

#genshin impact #genshin impact oneshot #kaeya alberich #childe #childe x reader #fanfic #genshin oneshot #genshin tartagalia #tartagila #aether #venti genshin impact #genshin impact venti #kaeya genshin impact

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buddyfromearth · 3 years

Text

Object of Affection

For @gothamsworst because your entire penguin tag has put into me a great fire to write a sheepish significant other for him. Mind you, I haven’t written fanfiction since high school so forgive me if I get something wrong (I’m still getting into DC and my parents think it’s embarrassing because I had a lobo phase out of high school.)

Notes: confessions of love; sfw (some slight implications at the end but it cuts off because that’s not going on this blog here); aw, gee, he brought a bouquet of flowers; hey who ordered flirting because here’s some; several headcanons in one go let’s go people; I can write pretty words I just mostly refuse to in favor of making it all comics instead; idea of flirting is just walking up with a bouquet and going “marry me”; I don’t know what I’m doing I’ve never written this guy before.

EDIT: fixed some things.

Stuck between yearning for love and the fear of rejection was a difficult place to be. It was at least easier to know rejection than it was to have yearning for love going totally unanswered. Oh, what pain it was.

Oswald Cobblepot, that troublesome Penguin known about Gotham as one hell of a man to cross, was madly in love. Yes, an unfortunate feeling to have. But he couldn’t help it. Not this time, at least.

It was someone he’d seen around the lounge, lurking nearby where he’d watch the penguins. When he saw them around and was able to not make it awkward, he couldn’t help but stare at those eyes all green and deep like some dark thicket. And those venomous eyes did plenty of staring back: he could feel their gaze fixated on him whenever he was working at the lounge.

Really, though, what did he know about this crush that had taken his entire heart by a single blow? Well, he knew enough. His eyes about Gotham told him that they weren’t much of anything besides a total hermit: mostly stayed home at a ground-floor apartment in a low-rent yet slightly decent part of town (as decent as the city could be, anyway), and had everything that was needed for living delivered to their door. No car: only ever ventured out on a trike with a headlight on the front and a trunk on the back. He wasn’t even sure what they did for a living.

At the very least Oswald knew he could find them lurking around the lounge. So, that’s exactly where he went.

Of course, such an event was not something to go into completely unprepared. He pulled out a nice suit, as usual, with all the fine accoutrements he was well-known for. An umbrella in one hand and a large bouquet of bloody red roses in the other. Even went out of the way to pick out cologne, albeit he preferred not to. He wanted to make the best impression he could.

It was just that odd hour before the post-work rush. Oswald hoped he’d not come in on a wrong night. Trying not to draw too much attention, he made a long sort of awkward path over to where they usually were.

There they were, right at that surprisingly bare table he got used to passing by. There was a pencil case pushed to one side, and it sat next to a tall glass of what he thought might be soda (of course, he wasn’t about to just try it: that would be a bit too much). They were hunched over something in front of them, and their hands moved quickly with a pencil and a brush.

“Excuse me, my dear,” started Oswald, with a soft tone so as to not scare this beloved mystery away, “but is this table taking guests?”

They jumped. Oswald feared he’d gone too fast. Oh, wonderful, now he’d scared them off!

They looked up and met his eyes. What was once a terrified look behind thick glasses quickly melted into something tender and rather curious. “Oh.” Their voice had an astoundingly flat affect, hinting at an origin out in midland farming country with the slight tint to it. They cleared their throat, and moved their bag to the other side. “S-sure thing, sir, sure. Wasn’t expecting anyone to be over here tonight. Normally people only ever come over to ask for free work from me.” Their voice was soft and quiet as they spoke: an absolutely adorable sound that hit just right in his ears. He could listen to it talk forever.

“Excellent.” Oswald sat down directly next to them, putting the umbrella to rest on the seat beside him.

Their face quickly changed colors. It went from a sickly pale in the lowlight to being absolutely taken over with blush. “R-right, s-sure. Please, forgive me for asking, but haven’t I seen you around here before?”

“Of course you would have seen me here before,” said Oswald, rolling his eyes slightly. “I own this lounge, after all.”

“Oh, I…” They stopped for a moment, and their mouth was slightly agape as they appeared to slowly mentally register the weight of the situation. Then their eyes shot wide open and they gave up a nervous smile with chattering teeth. “M-Mr. Cobblepot, sir. I-I-I didn’t think I was something you’d… well, y’know, actually come over to see?”

“Quite the contrary,” said Oswald, moving in closer and putting an arm around their shoulder. “You’ve captured my attention with how much you care about my darlings. I see you in here and I can’t help but wonder if you’re some kindred soul.” He gestured just slightly over at the centerpiece of the lounge, the namesake iceberg with a whole group of penguins he often spent hours watching on his days off.

They looked over to where he gestured, and then they nodded quickly. The nervousness quickly got itself out of that smile, and their entire posture melted into one of repose. “Your penguins, right. Right, the penguins! Of course! They’re so cute: little communal flipper birds that just waddle around and honk and preen all day.” They sighed and smiled, leaning forward and putting their head to rest in their hand. “What I wouldn’t give for a life so carefree.”

Oswald immediately had a few ideas come to mind. Oh, he could take care of that: he could just bring them into his life and get them out of that awful apartment, pamper them with anything and everything they could ever want. Ask them to move in with you. Ask them for a date. Ask them to share a drink. No, no, no, that’s all too fast! Play it slowly: perhaps they’ll melt into your arms if you go ahead just right.

“How often are you around here, hm?” Oswald looked over from behind his monocle at this mystery figure that had caught his attention and proceeded to hold it in a vice-like grip, taking a moment to look at what he was dealing with. Their figure was mostly obscured by big, bulky articles of clothing, but what could be made out was all thick and rolled together like some haphazard cake stacked up far too high for its own good. It was very easy to look at. “You seem to know enough about my precious little birds.” “Perhaps a bit too much” was a phrase he wanted to add, but he wasn’t about to murder this feeling.

“I don’t really drink alcohol. I only really come here to draw the iceberg and all the penguins,” said the mystery crush. “They’re so fun to smush together with their little shapes. Their little flippers are so cute. And their little feet are surprisingly complex once you get past all the flub and feathers.”

Oh, one of those artist types. Wait, artist type. Artist. Oh, this could be good: this could actually be really good for several different reasons! Not just the romantic pursuit reason, either: perhaps their passion for the arts would include, somewhere in there, a passion for him.

“I see.” Oswald reached for the pad of paper they were so vigilantly guarding and said, “I can’t help but have a look at someone’s work regarding my darlings.”

A sickly pale hand with chewed-down nails shot over and clamped in on Oswald’s wrist. “Just a second there, Mr. Cobblepot. You have to promise me something first.”

“Anything, my sweet, anything.”

“Don’t tell anyone what you see in this book. It’s a lot of… well, it’s… bad.”

“Oh, I will most certainly be the judge of that.” Oswald picked up the book, and then handed them the bouquet in return. “Here, something for you to hold in the meantime.”

Noting their shocked expression as they carefully took the bouquet in their arms, Oswald began to slowly browse through the contents of the book.

What they had said was indeed true: there were a lot of penguins in there. They were doing all sorts of things: preening their coats, honking, spread out on their stomachs staring at each other, ambling across the ice. They were all partway realistic, but there was some sort of fantastical flair to them. It was cute: just like them.

While flipping through the pages, though, he couldn’t help but notice other pieces. Things like the name of the lounge written out in poster type pieces with his penguins and their little iceberg on it. There was, undeniably, a unique work of a penguin in a suit like his. Curious, he turned the page.

And what he saw there surprised him greatly.

It was not only drawings of patrons with little notes about time scrawled around them that occupied the pages, but there were drawings of him as well. Little notes here and there about the things he’d wear, the way he’d talk, and the way he moved. Around one particular piece underlaid with purple markings was a portrait of him smiling: the note around this piece said “Handsome guy but who?” It was surrounded by little scribbled hearts.

Oswald, in his stroke of peacock vanity that got to him every now and again, turned his head slightly as he was gently urged by these things. “I see that you draw more than birds.”

The mystery crush looked over. They caught a look of what pages he’d come to and they grimaced before sighing and hiding their face in their hands. “Sorry about that. I-I draw people a lot, just to stay aware of how to do it.”

“It seems you’ve become quite taken with me in these intimate studies,” said Oswald, casting a rather tempered gaze and a matching grin over at the object of his affections as he handed back the book. “I must admit, I came here tonight thinking you wouldn’t reciprocate the feelings that brought me to you in the first place.”

“Oh, wow, feelings?” The mystery crush smiled and chuckled ever so softly, rubbing their hand along the back of their neck as they took the book and put it back on the table. “Goodness gracious, Mr. Cobblepot, I didn’t expect a gentlemanly type like yourself to be the romantic type.”

“Oh, but isn’t a gentleman always the romantic type?” Oswald, emboldened by such a soft response, couldn’t help but to pull them in closer. When they began to blush again, he grinned and pressed a gloved finger to their nose. “I can’t exactly help it. And please, just call me Oswald.” He then picked up one of their hands and pressed a single, fervent kiss to it.

“Ah, uh, I guess so,” said the mystery crush, “mister… oh, right, Oswald. Right, first name basis now.” Their face was getting hotter by the minute, and they began to stammer over all their words as they put the bouquet on the table. “I, uh… would, would you be offended if I asked you something kinda personal?”

Oswald could already picture several personal questions and perfect little answers to go along with them. He nodded and held their hands in his. “Oh, but of course, my dear: anything you ask for, you’ll get it from me.”

“Oh.” The mystery crush nodded, their glasses falling down their face in the meantime. When Oswald reached up and pushed them back to their previous position, they cleared their throat and quickly stammered out, “If you feel so strongly about me, would you mind if I moved in? I, uh… they hiked the rent on my place again and I have to find a new one before the end of the month. Don’t make enough.”

“Would I mind? Of course not, dearest bird, of course not. I have far too many places that need a colorful touch like yours. You can come with me tonight, if it pleases you, my dear.”

“You don’t have to be so heavy-handed with all the compliments.”

“Oh, but I believe you deserve every last one of them.”

“You’re far too kind.” The mystery crush sighed. “I hate to tell you this now, after all those compliments and affectionate talk, but I’m kind of a handful, I’m… look, I’m trans and if you’re not into a guy like me, I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m- I’m sorry. We can just go away from this table and never speak about this again. It… it’ll be fine if we do that.”

“Oh, now you just listen to me.” Oswald put his hands to the mystery crush’s face and leaned it over so they were looking at him. “I don’t rightly care about whether you’re trans or not, and I’ll fund that for you so you can be happy. You’re just far too pretty of a kindred spirit to be left so alone in such a big city.”

“I…” The mystery crush looked baffled. They froze for a moment or two, and Oswald wondered if he had said too much. After a long silence, they sighed and smiled so big and soft that it couldn’t help but bring him to smile as well. “Wow. Thanks.”

“Oh, you’re ever so welcome, my dear.” Oswald pressed his face up to theirs and quickly asked, “May I?”

“May you… oh, right. Right! Yes, you may, Oswald. You most certainly may!”

With that, Oswald couldn’t help but press a kiss to their lips. Their lips were slightly chapped, and he couldn’t help but nuzzle his face just slightly against theirs in some affectionate attempt to bring intimacy to such a moment. This move, while unexpected at first, was quickly reciprocated as their hands took hold of his shoulders.

Oswald pulled away with a troublesome little grin spread across his lips, and the object of all those affections smiled like this sort of intimacy was brand new to them. “I can’t help but wonder what your name is.”

“Look, my name is…” They stopped for a moment, but then they smiled and just said, “Call me Lou for now. I can’t think of a name that belongs to me.”

“Then let’s find that out together.” Oswald took his umbrella up and moved to stand, offering his hand to Lou. “Come, I can have a crew bring your things to our home tomorrow. Tonight, we shall simply be enamored little lovebirds.”

Lou laughed. Their laugh sounded like the call of a bird, with its dragged-out syllables and its pitch. They snorted just slightly as they packed up their things. “You’re very honest, Oswald. I like that. I like that a lot.”

“What’s a little honesty between significant others?” Oswald smiled and shrugged his shoulders.

Lou put their bag back on their shoulders and put their hand in Oswald’s as they stood up. They weren’t much taller than him, and those assumptions he had made about their figure were correct. “It’s a lot. Let’s go.”

Oswald only put his arm around them as the two gently went hand-in-hand to where his driver waited.

“What are the plans for this evening, Oswald?”

“Oh, I do believe I have a few ideas beginning to come to be. Just you be patient, my sweet, I’ll tell you when we’re alone.”

#writing #gothamsworst #not going into the tags #too embarrassing and self-inserty for the tags #gave the guy a different name too #just so it's not too self-inserty #I don't like getting rude comments about self-inserting #my writing

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mymelodyheart · 3 years

Text

All I Want For Christmas Is You Chapter 9 ~The Christmas Spirits~

Previously in Christmas Eve Rush

Her hand flew to her chest, and her eyes almost popped out at the realisation. "Good Lord. You're in love with her, aren't ye? It's all over your face. Oh my God!"

"Please? We dinnae have a lot of time," he whispered, almost close to tears. "Ye're the only one who can get through to Claire."

A few heartbeats passed as he held his breath.

"Fine! Let's do this!" Suddenly spurred by excitement into action, she quickly grabbed a piece of paper and pen and handed it to him. "Write down your number, and I'll update you after I've called Claire."

"Ye will?"

"Yes, yes ..." she muttered. "Come on, chop-chop!" She clapped her hands at him.

Elated with the turn of event, he didn't waste any more time and rapidly scribbled his number and pushed the piece of paper back to her. "Thank ye. I owe ye big time." When an afterthought came to him, he shoved his hand into his pocket, took out a spare key to his cottage and placed it on the table. It was meant to be for Claire. "Another favour, I have a dog and kitten in the house and ..."

"I got it." She grinned and made a shooing motion. "Now go!"

If you wish to read this on AO3, here is the link.

If you wish to read this from the beginning:

AO3 link

Tumblr link

Claire sat at the airport's cafe, every sound of someone's laughter and the sight of happy couples holding hands, driving a knife into her chest. She still had a few hours to go before its time to go through security. With a heavy heart, she miserably flipped the pages of a glossy magazine, unseeing its pages' articles and pictures. It had taken every iota of her resolve and will power to leave Broch Mordha, and now Annalise had made her book a later flight because her friend was on the way and wanted to talk. Damn her for making this more difficult! In truth, she wanted to know what Jamie had told her friend and wondered what he would have said if she'd confronted him instead of running away. Now that she was finally out of his life was he even thinking about her? Staying in Broch Mordha would have most probably increased the likelihood of her believing his excuses and running back into his arms. She just couldn't handle the emotional fallout.

"I beg your pardon, is this seat taken?" a soft feminine voice asked.

Claire briefly glanced up, offered a weak smile and motioned for the woman to sit. She wasn't in the state nor mood for small talks so she put her head down and pretended to read, hoping the woman would take a hint.

Restless, she glanced again at her phone to check the time. Annalise should be here soon. Is she planning to fly with me? I hope not! She noticed the cafe was beginning to get busy with people waiting for love ones to arrive or the check-in counter to open. Tomorrow at this time, she'd be home. The thought of spending Christmas in London in the cramped apartment made her doubly miserable. She loved the open spaces of the Highlands and quaint villages. Although the weather could be quite grim, the landscape's natural beauty and loads of fresh air more than made up for it. With its tranquil settings, it was an ideal place to start her writing career. She'd put it on hold for far too long, working for a publishing company that gave her very little satisfaction and yesterday she'd even fantasised of moving to Broch Mordha and making it a reality to be closer to Jamie. How could I have been so stupid?

"Highlands in December is romantic, isn't it?" The woman sharing her table smiled pleasantly. "I love this place. There's something magical about it, don't you agree?"

Ah, another English woman to fall for the Highland charm! She was about to give some generic answer about the Highlands' ancient history lending the romance a hint of mysticism when the harsh truth chose that moment to free itself. "Kind of deceiving though, isn't it? I got caught up in that so-called magic, but some wanker decided to exploit it and use my heart to make fertiliser. I've only known him for a couple of days, but I can't stand being in this place anymore without thinking about him and his stupid, stupid handsome face. And the way he looked at me." She blew a breath and blinked back the tears. "I guess I was just plain naive and a bloody dimwit for thinking smooth talkers only existed in big cities like London. I tell you what, they're rife everywhere and you can never be too careful."

If the woman had been surprised by Claire's outburst, it didn't show. "Now, now, I'm quite sure there is a perfect explanation. Lovely and sweet as you look, I see the wisdom that belies your age in your eyes. You don't seem like a person to be taken by someone's smooth line at all."

She let out an almost deranged laugh. "Well, obviously, I am. I took one look at a beautiful face, and all logic went south. So there," Claire huffed.

The other woman looked away and sipped her tea. She was much older than Claire thought - in her forties maybe or could be fifties, but it was hard to tell. She had a dark, sleek modern bob hairstyle that contradicted the mumsy grey slacks, woollen jumper and lack of makeup and accessories. Her face was kind though, and there was a serenity in her demeanour she found comforting and familiar.

Claire regretted her oversharing and decided to shut her mouth and continued reading.

"I met my husband many years ago here. Not far from where we are now. A place called Broch Mordha."

Claire's head shot up. "Oh! Is your husband Scottish?"

"No, he's English. We met one summer while watching a Highland game. He lived in Broch Mordha while doing some research for work, and I was on holiday. We fell in love and eventually married. And every year from thereon we celebrated our anniversary here. It's a very special place for us."

"That's very sweet," Claire remarked, trying not to think of Jamie and what could have been for them if he hadn't been a knobhead.

The woman let out a soft laugh and daintily wiped her mouth with a napkin. "Sweet isn't the description I would have used to describe the circumstance of how we met; nevertheless, it turned out my darling husband is my soul mate and marrying him had been the best decision I've ever made in my life."

"Good for you ..." Claire whispered, subtly glancing once more at the time on her phone. She hoped Annalise would be here soon because the last thing she needed right now was to hear someone else's happily forever after. But in the end, curiosity got the better of her. "So what made you change your mind about him?"

The woman sighed and took out her book. "My husband was an insensitive clod, and when he eventually saw the error of his ways and asked for forgiveness, I gave him a second chance. Forgiving him didn't change the past, and I realised in the end, if I hadn't forgiven him, my actions would have robbed me of the best years of my life. And of course, a beautiful daughter who turned out to be everything I've ever hoped for and much more." She smiled and then turned her attention to reading. Obviously, oversharing was now over.

"I see ..." Claire muttered. Well, what had she expected? A magical solution? She almost laughed out loud. No such thing!

It was too late for her and Jamie anyway. She was on her way to London, and he'd probably moved on now that she was gone. It was definitely better this way. Out of sight, out of mind.

**********

He switched off the ignition of his car and texted Annalise to inform her he'd arrived at his destination. She'd messaged him earlier letting him know Claire would be at D'Lish cafe. Scanning his vicinity, Jamie drew in a lungful of air. He'd only been in Inverness Airport's parking lot a few minutes, and already his nerves were on tenterhooks. From the congested traffic and beeping cars to stressed people madly rushing about, Jamie realised how far from his world he'd strayed, and the distance was only under an hour's drive.

He hadn't even stepped out of his car, and already he was counting the minutes till he was back within the peaceful haven of Broch Mordha. But he'd made up his mind. He wasn't going back without Claire and had taken his passport with him just in case he would have to follow her all the way to London. How he was going to manage that with his unpredictable episodes, he had no idea. He hoped he would be able to keep his panic attacks at bay long enough until he found her and convinced her to come back home.

"I'll walk in with you," Harry said quietly out of the blue as if he'd sense his trepidation. "My flight isn't till later, and my wife is probably enjoying her cuppa tea somewhere."

The tightness in his body relaxed, and Jamie nodded gratefully. Harry seemed to always understand his situation, popping out of the blue at the strangest times. Jamie had never questioned it and put it down to simply Harry being unusually perceptive and a good friend.

They quietly walked side by side towards the airport and when they entered the building, moving bodies and a sea of faces swarmed his vision. The racket and clamour of people going about their business surrounded him, and Christmas crowds trying to make it home before Christmas jostled too close, their cacophony of voices chattering excitedly.

Jamie swallowed the mounting panic and fixed his thoughts on Claire, breathing deeply in through his nose and with a heaving chest, letting it all out with a whoosh. His eyes darted and saw people smiling and nodding animatedly, laughter and children's squeals infiltrating his consciousness, their sound accompanied by an air of anticipation that told him it was a season of joy.

Jamie managed to put a grim smile on his face and concentrated on getting one foot in front of the other, apologising now and again whenever he accidentally bumped into someone, almost stumbling like an intoxicated man. Although aware of Harry's presence, perspiration coated his skin, and he could feel a bead of sweat running down his temple. The usually comfortable soft fabric of his sweatshirt chaffed and squeezed him like a clamp almost suffocating him. The chaotic din typical of an airport during the holiday season came in a huge rush of waves, at first faint, then building to a deafening sound that roared in his ears, shattering his foundation and foothold.

Oh, God, please, not now. Jamie knew it was happening. Attempting not to panic, he began to employ a technique that more often than not worked. He tried listening to his mother's singing in his head, the one that stuck most in his mind and brought him comfort when he'd been amidst a conflict in a war zone, a song that sang him to sleep when he was a wee bairn.

He stopped a few metres away from the cafe where Claire was supposed to be waiting and took a moment to draw in oxygen, clinging to his mother's singing in his head. Goodnight, you moonlight ladies. Rockabye, sweet baby, James. Deep greens and blues are the colours I choose. Won't you let me go down in my dreams? And rockabye, sweet baby, James.

He dimly recognised where he was, busy eateries, cafes and shops lined a wide area, a focal point for those waiting for love ones to arrive or passengers before heading to security that led to the departure area. Someone's child screamed nearby, and the sound of suitcases dragging on its wheels seemed to rumble and reverberate on the ground. Christmas light decorations that normally shimmered unobtrusively and gave a soft glow suddenly seemed to flash all around him, and the Christmas songs playing in the background became disembodied sounds. Jamie froze, gripped in the throes of a colossal panic attack that forced him to sink halfway to his knees.

Everything seemed to fade in and out, but it was Harry's voice he eventually clung to, his mother's singing hushing into the recesses of his head. The Englishman repeated his name and grabbed hold of his elbow, preventing him from collapsing to the floor and leading him firmly away from the moving crowd. Jamie pitched himself against the giant column and fought the crippling dread chipping away at his sanity.

He glanced around frantically, but Harry's hand grabbed his face and forced him to look straight into amber eyes.

"Breathe, Jamie. Everything is going to be alright. Just keep breathing."

"H-Harry ...I n-need to ..."

"It's alright. I know. I'm not going anywhere. Just breath."

Jamie unzipped his jacket and fought for air, sucking in a lungful. And then, again and again, gasping and coughing as he doubled over, bracing his hands on his knees. Harry's strong hand massaged his back in a circular motion, the older man's presence calm and controlled, breathing with him, encouraging to gradually take in more air.

It took a while to normalise his breathing, his heart to calm down and the cold sweat to evaporate. As he regained more control, though wobbly at first, he straightened up. Gathering his bearings, he ignored the odd looks from passersby, by now already used to it.

Harry gave him a reassuring smile. "Feeling much better?"

Jamie managed a nod as the initial feeling of shame and embarrassment took over the panic attack. Why am I even here? Claire deserved so much better than this and all his fucking issues. On top of it all, he'd managed to make her feel cheap when he was nothing but just half a man. There was no way she'd go back to Broch Mordha with him.

"Oh no, you don't. I know that look in your eyes. You've made it this far, old sport," Harry whispered fiercely, straightening his jacket. "Don't you even think of going back home without trying!"

Jamie blinked, confused. What the fuck? What does Harry know? But there was no time to ask questions, as he caught a glimpse of Claire past Harry's shoulder. She was in the cafe in the motion of getting up, her head bowed down while speaking on the phone.

Last night, he'd held Claire in his arms and now, the reality of the moment hit him hard as he saw her hand gripped the suitcase next to her, reminding him she's waiting to board a plane. He could hardly think over the furious pounding in his chest as a combination of relief at seeing her and fear of rejection surged through him. He barely registered himself, moving towards the cafe when Harry put a hand on his arm. He turned to meet his friend's eyes. "You're on your own now. For now. Remember to breathe."

Jamie swallowed hard and nodded.

"Now go and hurry."

**********

Claire panicked, her eyes darting around the cafe. Annalise had just called and confessed Jamie was on his way to talk to her. Her friend had insisted on giving Jamie a chance to explain and that he'd made a mistake.

But Claire couldn't do this. She didn't have this sort of experience nor the emotional strength to handle this kind of situation. All she knew and was aware of was how much Jamie had hurt her with his words.

She quickly stood up, said goodbye to the woman sat on her table, grabbed her bags and made her way out of the cafe. She kept her head down and tried not to look around in case Jamie spotted her. She began to walk faster, weaving through crowds of travellers as she wheeled her suitcase, images of Jamie encroaching her thoughts. A new voice was trying to make itself heard, telling her maybe she ought to listen to what Jamie had to say. But what was there to say? She'd seen what he wrote with her own eyes, and there was no explaining himself out of it.

She was just getting into the queue for the security check when a shout cut through the hubbub surrounding her.

"Sassenach!"

She stiffened, and her hand went slack around the suitcase's handle, sending its bulk toppling to the floor. It took a few heartbeats for her to turn around and face Jamie, afraid her resolve would collapse if she looked at him. When she finally saw him, he stood a few yards away, suspended in a sea of bustling chaos. Perspiration beaded his forehead, his face pale and eyes a little wild as they searched hers, snagging on the way she snatched her suitcase to an upright position and pulled it closer to her side. As always, ever since she first laid eyes on him, his unusual male beauty made her chest ache. A head taller than most, he looked out of place in the busy surroundings, his blue eyes penetrating through everything in their wake to reanimate her heart.

She waited for something to happen, but he just continued to stare at her, his body swaying a little. He looked like he was about to faint. Worry, combined with fear prickled her skin when she recalled his accounts of his PTSD condition. She'd made it this far, and now she was torn between going over to him and making her way to the security.

"What are you doing here?" she said a little harshly.

"Dinnae go in that plane.”

"It's too late for that."

Anguish fogged his handsome features. "I need ye to hear me out, Sassenach. Please."

Claire shook her head. "What is there to say, Jamie? That text you wrote, told me everything already."

"Please let me explain ..."

"I already know what you're going to say, Jamie. You're going to say you didn't mean to write that text. It's classic and cliche at the same time and utter bullshit." Claire's shoulders sagged, and she swallowed hard. "No, I'm sorry, I can't ..."

She started to step into the queue, but stopped, her heart caught in her throat when a passerby in a rush accidentally bumped into him, and he almost vaulted over. She saw how much it took out of him just to remain upright. She made a move to come to his aide, but he stopped her with a motion of his hand, telling her he would say his piece without any help. Squeezing his eyes shut, he took several deep breaths, discomfort, and distress in this busy environment evident on his face.

"You don't look well, Jamie. You should go home," she said, glancing around, aware of people looking at him.

"Damn it, Sassenach," he wheezed. "I'm gonnae make ye listen even if it kills me."

A stabbing pain went through her heart. "I can't do this, Jamie. I'm going."

"No!" He took another unsteady step forward. When Claire stayed put, relief washed over his face. "What I wrote to my sister about you was wrong ..."

Rage replaced the hurt she was feeling. "You made it sound I was just a notch on the bedpost," she snapped, angrily.

Jamie winced as a woman nearby gasped and glared at him, but they both ignored her. "No, Sassenach. You were never that ..."

"Your words winter fling said it all. What else could it mean?"

"Sometimes, what I think and what I feel doesn't translate into words ..."

"Or you don't think at all," she interrupted, tipping her head back to keep the tears from falling.

His head dropped. "No, I didnae think. What I said was inexcusable, and no explanation or apologies would take any of the hurt I caused ye back."

"It was a horrid thing to say about someone!"

His face flickered with regret and self-loathing. "It was, and I'm an arsehole for it."

"They why? Why Jamie? Is that how you talk about your conquests?"

His face paled even more. "No! You're not that at all. What we had was special, and I've never felt like this about someone before."

"You could have fooled me ..."

He took a careful step forward as if afraid she would bolt. "Sassenach, I said what I said not because that was what I thought about you and that's the truth. Partly, I text those words to get my sister off my case. She was badgering me for getting involved with ye because she was worried about me falling for someone from the city due to my condition. Another part of the reason I wrote that had to do with my fear of getting emotionally attached. I thought by labelling what we had as temporary, it would be easier to let ye go when the time comes. It was wrong ...so wrong. I wish I hadnae said it."

Claire could barely see him through the blur of tears. The awful pain she'd had in her heart all morning waned a little. She forced her feet to move, but the emotion in his voice kept her rooted in place.

"Christ, everything happened so fast between us. And I was rushing ahead before I could comprehend what was happening. When ye told me ye live in London, I was convinced that nothing could come out of this ...us ...whatever this is we have ....because I wouldnae ken how to live in yer world and it wouldnae be right to ask ye to give up yers. When I asked ye to extend yer stay, my intention was to make as many memories with ye because I needed to face the truth of my limitations. I was determined not to be that someone who held ye back and made ye regret what ye could've done. I said to mysel' whatever time ye could give me, I'd be grateful. Yet, here I am, begging ye not to get on that plane."

She wanted to go to him, take him in her arms and forget what had happened, but she needed more. She needed to know that this thing between them was more than just a handy itinerary with chemistry tossed into the mix. For her, it had always been more, but he's a man, and maybe it's just all about sex for him.

"Sorry, Jamie." Bracing her shoulders, she pulled her suitcase behind her and joined the line for security check-up.

"Wait!"

She and every person within hearing distance in the queue turned around to look at him.

This time, Jamie didn't flinch and looked at her straight in the eyes with unwavering intensity. "I cannae let ye go without giving it my best shot. I've used my condition as an excuse for far too long, yet not once did ye ever look at me as someone damaged. I dinnae want my condition to stop me anymore from going after what I want. I swear to God, ye havenae seen persistence yet, Sassenach. Ye have nae idea what it looks like until ye've seen it on me. I've fought for my life in a war zone before, and I'm doing it again now. If ye get on that bloody plane, be rest assured I will be on the next flight behind yours. I will show up in every God damned place ye go to until ye give me the time of day. And I willnae stop until I get it through yer pretty head how much ye mean to me. And if ye come back to me, I promise ye, I'm gonnae work my arse off to prove to ye every day how special ye are. Even if it means moving to London to be closer to ye. All I'm asking for is a second chance."

Looking at him, she knew he meant every word, and there was an intensity about him, that told her he would go through with his threat of following her to London. A lump stuck in Claire's throat, so huge she could barely speak. Her face crumpled, and she let the unshed tears she'd held all morning flow. Unable to stand a moment longer without feeling his arms around her, she let go of her grip on her suitcase and began to make a move towards him. Jamie fell back a few steps, both hands flying to rest on top of his head, relief and disbelief visible in every line of his body. She covered the distance separating them in three steps and flung herself into strong arms that circled around her without hesitation. Applause, cheers and whistles from passengers who had witnessed the scene erupted around them, making them both laugh through tears.

"Jesus Christ, Jamie," she stammered with a hiccup. "You really know how to cause a scene and really make it count."

A hand tunnelled through her hair, gripping her neck so he could angle her head and kiss her. "I'm so sorry, Sassenach. Oh, God, I'm so sorry," he muttered against her lips. "I was an idiot. I thought I wasnae gonnae make it."

A shudder passed through her. "I almost got on a plane and spent Christmas on my own."

Jamie fell back into the nearest seat, taking Claire with him. Obviously spent from all the emotions. "Dinnae remind me ...ever again, please. But just so ye know, I have my passport with me. I was ready to come after ye. Today."

Claire clung to him tighter. "It's Christmas, and we're together. Let's just focus on that."

"Christ, I thought I knew fear." His breath shook and fanned her skin. "That was the scariest situation I've been in."

She let out a sigh, inhaling his scent from the crook of his neck. How had she thought for one second that running away would have been a better option? She thought of the woman she spoke to earlier in the cafe and smiled.

Jamie shook her a little. "Ye're going to think this is mad, but I dinnae want to take another second for granted, so I'm just going to say it, so ye ken once and for all."

"Say what?" she whispered. Jamie tilted her face up for a slow, deep kiss, then stood, lifting her in his arms.

"I'm in love with ye, Sassenach. I ken it's too soon, but I want it out there just in case something happens and I dinnae get another chance to say it, or I do something stupid like making ye cry. Life's too short for over-analysing things and keeping something like that to myself."

She smiled through fresh tears. "I'm in love with you too, Jamie. And next time you say something stupid, I'm just going to get into a fight with you about it, instead of running away."

Jamie's laughter rumbled in his chest before his face turned serious. "Merry Christmas, Sassenach. May it be our first of many more to come."

Claire reached out and clasped his face with her hands and laid a soft kiss on his lips. Her heart broke open, and for the first time, all the pieces clicked together in a perfect puzzle, and everything made perfect sense. Because she'd learned early on you needed to take the bad with the good and embrace it all. Despite Jamie's condition and fear of uncertainty, she'd taken a gamble and trusted her guts, and by giving him a second chance, they'd ended up with the best thing of all.

Love at Christmas.

She knew it wasn't going to be smooth sailing forever. There were going to be long talks of how they ought to proceed with their relationship, compromises to be made, and probably many teething problems during their phase of getting to know each other. But as long they both keep their hearts open, they should have a fighting chance.

"Merry Christmas to you too," she whispered, her voice raspy with emotion.

"Shall we go home?" he murmured, smiling.

"Yes, let's go home."

Hand in hand they left the airport and headed back to Broch Mordha to celebrate Christmas.

Dear Readers,

Firstly, thank you for your best wishes and feedback from the previous chapter. This latest update was supposed to be published on Christmas day. Unfortunately, because I was so overly ambitious about the storyline, I was unable to deliver. I didn't want to rush it after having gone through the story in my head many times. Rushing it probably would have made me miss many of the elements I wanted to put in this story.

Anyway, I had a lovely quiet Christmas. With everything that's happening globally, it was more of a time for reflection for us instead of celebration. I am just grateful that my love ones are safe and healthy and hope you're own dearests are as well. As for this story's direction, I don't know how many chapters there are to go, but I can safely say there is another one after this. I will try to publish before New Year, and if I am unable to do so, I wish you all a New Year full of exciting possibilities, good health and lots of love. Keep the good vibes rolling and take care. X

#melodyheart #all I want for christmas is you #claire beauchamp #jamie fraser #Claire Beauchamp/Jamie Fraser #outlanderfanfic

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vinylhazza · 3 years

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“i want to go home” and “let me go” with ethan 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 make it angsty i missed ur angst

you don’t want to fight with him. you weren’t the fighting type, but christ he can be insufferable sometimes. it hurt you to fight with him - no matter how much he deserved to have his ass handed to him on more than one occasion.

ethan is stubborn. often times brooding during your time together. you’ve known that since the first day you met him and watched with confused delite when he refused for you to pay for your own coffee only minutes after having small talk. he wasn’t the easiest to understand right off the bat that’s for sure. he’d talked of things far beyond your comprehension and spoke eloquently. he’d inserted his card into the chip reader with his brows turned down in a pout, dark hair a perfect mess atop his head, shoes shined, suit pressed. the corners of his mouth drooped to match his adorable pout, merely shaking his head briskly when you’d tried to pay him back. you’d known it to be a kind gesture, and he confirmed those thoughts by later slipping the small white receipt piece in your jacket pocket with seven messy digits drawn right next to a sloppy smiley face.

you still have that receipt in the top drawer of your nightstand. that spark...you remembered that first spark. thinking of him from that day on was habit, and often times more than you could handle. he’d captured a part of you before you’d even realized it. he had that effect on people.

you waited weeks until you’d texted him, too much of a chicken-shit to think he actually meant it as anything more than a kind gesture for listening to him drone on about marketing for at least a half an hour. to your surprise, he had texted back in minutes. from them on he’d made every attempt at scoring a date with you, and when he finally did - you had the best night of your life.

boy did the man have a personality. take that as you will.

if he so much as felt you were having an attitude, he’d refuse your kisses until you agreed to talk to him like a “big girl.” you knew from the moment he whipped his head to the side and shut his eyes, your body going still where you leaned across the table watching him pay bills or work on deadline work. not only did it make you want to fall into the floor and hope the foundation swallowed you up, but it forced you to talk - something you could never get him to do.

ethan only buys you the best of the best despite your objections. you figured that’s what love means to him in a way, giving your all even if it wasn't emotionally. you'd never had the guts to tell him you like to be held more than anything. he makes sure to never leave you unsatisfied in bed - especially if he noticed your legs weren’t shaking hard enough to his liking. tells you any story you want to hear if it means you’ll sleep peacefully. let’s you read your favorite books to him: his head in your lap, arms crossed over his chest in thought, pondering eyes on the ceiling. he’d stop you for explanations along the way. it was an adorable habit that you will love until the end of time. the fact that he wanted to hear your thoughts. you found yourself jotting down scribbles in the margins just to remember the moments exactly as they were: pure.

he tries to act hard, like the world is his slave and bends at his will, you know - oh you know just how soft his heart truly was. even if he was an arrogant ass 87% of the time. but he’s learning. how to be a boyfriend, how to be a man that doesn’t have to hide from vulnerability and emotion. he’s learning despite his discomfort.

ethan never wanted help when making the bed, no matter how many times you insisted and he always wanted to help you put your sunscreen on during summer and run your baths when you’ve had a long day. his work computer was shut off at seven sharp every night and shower always started at six in the morning. keys must be placed on their rightful hook and shoes on the mat. notepad must be placed on his side of the bed in case a thought wakes him in the night and he can’t go to sleep until he writes it down. all of which were non negotiable. he was stubborn, yes...but you loved him.

above all else there was love. so much love it consumed him deep in the pits of his body, mind and soul. even if he couldn’t, or much rather wouldn’t explain just how much you’d bewitched him...there was love.

he had a funny way of showing this love through obstacles and hoops you’d taken forever to jump through early on in your odd relationship. first it was friendship, a strange friendship at that. mostly consisting of calling each other randomly to ask what the person was thinking at that moment, which led to conversations of witches, wizards, and ghouls - children's tales and memories from the past that sprung free of the net. regardless if he meant for it to happen or not, that friendship blossomed into a whirlpool of admittances he would have damned himself for in the past:

“I wanted to see you”

“I hope you're okay”

“let me know when you get home safe”

“can you read that part again? I like the sound of your voice”

“I know you got that job, they’d be insane not to hire you”

“come over, I miss you”

“do you miss me too?”

“I thought of you today”

friendship turned into fire kindling in the pits of him

he wasn’t easy to trust others and you’d earned that trust fair and square. first through kindness, honesty, and a lot of self control. he wasn’t like every guy you’d been with in the past and you didn’t treat him like such. you’d been the only one to take your time and learn the inner workings of his mind and understand, not just engage or maintain his happiness. you’d expanded your craft in making him happy. giggling in bed at 3am, lovestruck, insanely, truly, madly, deeply happy. but demons don’t go away forever, and good behavior must be learned - especially with a life that has treated you unfairly.

you understood how troubled ethans mind could be at times and you tried to be patient. patient enough that when he looked over at you, he trusted that you’d listen to him even if he was being irritating and crude. the darkness swirling in his eyes didn't scare you off, not like the others. you chose to stay time and time again. not that you were a push over by any means but one must understand how hard it became sometimes, to be patient in times where he blocked out every voice, every noise, every reasonable answer and refused to listen. refused your help and your advice, gave you silence as a reward for thirty minutes of trying to make him smile. it was frustrating to be ignored.

there was a lesson you'd known to be true: no matter how many stars you wish on, how many pennies you drop into the well, nothing is ever as perfect as it seems.

you had told him more times than you could count on one hand: you weren’t his enemy. when it felt like the world was out to get him, like the sky was black and blue and he couldn’t see any light in the foreseeable future, you were there with a kind hand to lead him back. back to himself, reality, sanity. with the good came the bad and the constant back and forth it was taking it’s toll. if something didn’t change soon, he’d find that his light has left him in the clouds.

that’s how you found yourself sitting with your fingers fiddling in your lap, in the passenger seat of a car that you’d have to sell your soul to be able to afford, the hot air blowing through the vents and over your now trembling fingers, dress now more tight and uncomfortable than it seemed to be half an hour ago. you tried focusing on anything than the eery silence, save for the quiet music rolling through the speakers. it was easier than you’d thought to drown out the voices - you weren’t in the mindset to listen to someone else's problems. the many rings you wore now the main focal point for the agonizing hour drive back to your shared apartment.

it was a collection of pointless noise. pointless for the simple reason that the only sound you really wanted at the time was ethans voice. the low vibration that shot sparks straight to your stomach, the vibrato that sounded like home. anything to let you know he was okay, that he was working through his emotions instead of shutting them off.

“you okay?”

the last thing that had been said in over 30 minutes. you knew he was frustrated with himself by the white knuckled grip on the steering wheel, the way he drove at least ten over the speed limit, and the torturous strain of his taught jaw muscles, eyes shooting daggers at the road. he hadn’t given you an answer.

if you’d known Alec would be there, you never would have gone. you never thought in a million years you’d be seeing him again unless forced by the universe to punish you. punish you both. how often did you see your boyfriends ex bestfriend who happened to co-exist as the ex of your very own bestfriend? a person you’d both chosen to cut ties with for a multitude of reasons. for the better. a lying manipulating cheater that had no place in your life or anyone that you loved. the connection between the two had been a shock at first, but you were quick to warn ethan about the deceitful nature of his “friend.” you wondered how you’d never met ethan before considering that link but were thankful he decided to shoot his shot in the café not a block from your old apartment.

alec was...sneaky. not only had he betrayed you and your bestfriend, shown his true colors, but he’d also betrayed ethan - his closest companion for over a decade. it wasn’t long before he dropped the both of them like they were a virus he was glad to be rid of. it broke your heart to see them both grieve the man they thought they knew. from that day forward, you made it your mission to try and lessen that pain for the two of them in whatever way you could. you became the anchor to a ship gone rogue.

you’d been just as shocked as ethan to see him at the event. an event he wouldn’t have even been at, had it not been for ethan and his good word.

alec was part of the holding company, Rissito’s Publishing Co golden boy. a new top boss only thanks to ethans referral and promise that he’d “kill it.” HR ate it up. if only ethan had known beforehand the betrayal that would unleash after his hiring - he’d have stuck his foot in his mouth long before he told HR to give him a chance.

Alec was someone who gained respect without earning it first. someone who took advantage of a good friends kindness and used it for his own benefit, while leaving that same friend in the dust. he was a dispicable tyrant that had nothing better to do than ruin people to get ahead. no matter what cost.

he was someone who rarely showed his face at events that gave him no ego boost or feeling of supremacy.

you didn’t think your stomach would twist up at the the mere sight of his icy blonde air, unbelievable posture, and wicked grin. but it did. the few times you’d met him for your friend and for ethan...you’d felt the wind of something bad. “something wicked this way comes” right?

you’d been so stunned that you’d stopped in your tracks and let go of ethan’s hand altogether. the air stuck somewhere deep down in your chest, threatening to burst if you didn’t get as far away as you could. of course he would be here, he was invited to speak on behalf of the company. you quickly scolded yourself, reminded that this night wasn’t about you or alec no matter what past or resentment you held - it was about being there in support of ethan and his accomplishments.

alec had strolled up on stage draped with navy velvet curtains, right to a glass podium clear enough that you had to squint to see it just to “give his thanks and welcome” to the crowd of overdressed office workers. you wondered for a brief moment how strange he sounded when he spoke formally. like a robot coached to please. he’d used the same voice when he gaslighted your friend into thinking she was insane and needed help. really he was the lost boy. he spoke down to the group of people he now had authority over. people you knew he didn’t give two fucks about. he looked the same as you remembered - but if possible more sinister. he was the devil in the flesh and someone you knew could set ethan off in seconds. to your horror, your suspicions were true.

this was ethan’s night. at least to you and everyone that cared about him. a night he worked hard towards and quite frankly busted his ass to achieve. he deserved the silver platters, champagne, laughs with his co-workers, a pat on the back from his boss standing somewhere near the exit that you’d missed somehow on your way in. you knew it would be ruined if he let his anger get the best of him. you couldn’t stop his fuse igniting, and just when you thought you’d made it to the clear, that he’d been paying too much attention in trying to find snacks to satisfy his growling stomach - ethan froze beside you. statue still and glaring at alec. you were shocked alec didn’t drop dead from the look.

“i want to go home,” ethan had seethed immediately upon seeing Alec rise to the podium, grabbing your wrist tight with his fingers. too tight would describe his hold. much too tight. he all but ignored your grimace and look of confusion.

“we just got here ethan, you haven’t even received the award,” you had tried to reason with him. he was acting brash. impulsive and irrational. he’d be called to the stage any moment, an award he obviously no longer cared about. when ethan was set on a mission, he was rarely persuaded.

“i don’t give a fuck,” he growled lowly, turning to look at you with laser hot eyes, “i don’t want to be anywhere near that prick and honestly i don’t know why you would either, y/n.”

it stung to hear him spit your name through his clenched teeth, but you tried your best to ignore it.

you heard him. you did. but you also knew he’d regret walking out the door more than he thought at the time. for years all he’s wanted was the recognition that he’d get in just a few minutes - the praise you knew he yearned for. but he was hell bent on getting the hell away from he who must not be named.

“tonight isn’t about him. it’s about your amazing accomplishments. something you’ve earned and worked hard for. don’t let him take this away from you!” of course your words fell on deaf ears. he wasn’t in any position to negotiate.

“stop. talking,” he barked, nails digging into your delicate skin, marching through the crowd of concerned on-lookers.

“ethan stop...you’re hurting me. please stop and talk to me, we can go to the bathroom or something,” you begged, trying not to blush with all eyes set on the two of you. taking a quick glance around to the raised eyebrows and turned up lips you shook your head in embarrassment. you were mortified to be a part of such a scene.

you were embarassed to be causing such a scene at a prestigious event for one of the biggest publishing companies in the country. it caused your stomach to turn at the thought of ever having to face the crowd of people again. your office visits would be few and far between after this.

“baby please,” you whimpered pathetically, trying yet again to be a voice of reason. you figured a pet name would get through to him. hopefully to calm the storm crashing in his head, “stop and look at me.”

“all he’s ever done is fucking ruin things, y/n. don’t you agree? he caused you and i both havoc for MONTHS and you want to stand and listen to this fucking shit?” he barked, turning to look at you with daggers for eyes, “i’ll be damned if i stare at his cocky smirk all night long.” you worried his jaw might break from the strength of his clenching, but chose to keep your knit picking you yourself he’d grumbled one last “fucking dickhead.” before you’d flinched at the aching of your wrist.

being dragged through a crowd of people wasn’t exactly the easiest task when you could barely keep up with his strides on a daily basis, let alone when he was sprinting around tables set for a feast, elegantly dressed men and women, staff that bustled about, and security that eyed you both like a hawk - thankful for your hasty exit.

“let me go!” you cried with one final feeble attempt to reach him through his blind rage from just the sight of the man that had hurt you both deeply. you wretched your hand like a girl gone mad, ignoring the gasps of people much too prudish to ever sympathize with your situation - all they knew what judgment and riches.

guilt crashing through his wall of xxx only allowing him a horrified glance back at your pained expression, yanking his hand back and away from you without a word. he held his arm to his chest as if it pained him to touch you in any way but his usual soft caress.

you watched warily when he turned toward the open set of double doors, this time without grabbing you. you had half a mind not to follow him. but you weighed your options heavily: stay for no reason and get judged and ridiculed by a crowd of people that thought less of you than dirt and even worse, have to talk to alec? or run after ethan and hope for the best on the ride home? hanging your head, you gathered the bottom of your burgundy dress in your hands shyly as to not trip and humiliate yourself further, walking briskly towards the parking lot. you knew he’d be more than ashamed with himself for acting the way he had, disgusted with his failure to perceiver through a problem.

he’s lost control. ethan hated losing control.

isnt that exactly what alec would want? he would want to see ethan crumble before his eyes and the many eyes of people he’s meant to be composed and professional around. create a name for himself: not a good one.

he would want to see him act out and lose his sanity with resentment and hatred in front of the well respected business men and women he worked with daily. alec was far too narcissistic to admit to his wrongdoings, but had a way of making his victims seem crazy. it was the toxicity you’d dealt with for the entirety of your miserable relationship. you felt ill at the fact that ethan had to experience it. had to deal with it for the sake of his job.

he did hate him, more than he’d admit. but really what lied beneath the surface is something he’s only admitted to you once before when he’d had one too many shots. more than anything, alec caused him a great deal of pain. ethan was hurt by his late friend. he was hurt by the reckless behavior and betrayal. he was hurt that alec tried to take his job out from under him instead of being satisfied with what he had. he was hurt that he treated you no greater than a peasant. he was hurt that he’d thrown away years of friendship just to get ahead. more than anything, ethan was hurt. but of course he was too stubborn to say that to you, to anyone, maybe even too scared to admit it to himself.

pulling into the parking garage was in no way an experience you wanted to relive again. the silence pained you. the silence pained him too, and you know it whether or not he’d say so. your tears, silently falling right next to the man you’d normally run to, went unnoticed. the yellow-orange of the lights bounced off the hood of the car to illuminate your devestated expression. you couldn’t believe how the night had played out and how easy it had been for alec to get the best of you both. he had won. again. the thought made your stomach churn.

he was out of line tonight. he’s not only made an ass of himself in front of the head management of his company, but he’d had total disregard for his actions towards you - physical and verbal. tonight...he was someone you didn’t want to be around.

your wrist was red from where he’d grabbed you at the party, reminding you that ethan did need a serious wake up call. you’d done as much as you could to soothe him and you won’t be subject to his wrath.

when he finally turned into a parking spot and turned the car off, he finally did speak. but it was in no way what you wanted to hear.

“they’ll hold the award. i would have been on the stage speaking for a couple seconds before they moved on.”

despite your efforts, you scoffed at how abtuse he really was to the situation.

“i asked if you were okay. but you acted very not okay and i don’t know how to help you or even if i want to,” you told him earnestly, eyes glued to your lap.

“what does that even mean?” ethan snapped, running a hand through his hair.

you watched as a grey expedition passed in the side mirror before you chose to respond as calmly as you could.

“it was so easy for you to lose control.”

“i don’t stay in situations that hinder me or the people i care about.”

“oh so now you care about me?”

“that’s not fair, y/n,” he sighed, shaking his head and looking out his respective window.

“and this is?” you hold up your reddened wrist, just far enough that he couldn’t ignore the gesture and turned to look at you briefly.

“it wasn’t personal, i just get so...”

“angry. you were angry and i understand why you would be. al...he showed up out of nowhere and you don’t do well with surprises. but he is a part of that company now and maybe we both should have prepared ourselves before we stepped foot out of the apartment tonight. i didn’t deserve that and neither did anyone else at the event tonight.”

he opened his mouth to speak, another excuse your sure but you carried on while blinking back hot tears.

“you were impulsive and gave no mind to the way you treated me and how it must have looked to your boss who watched us leave not even 30 minutes after we arrived. how do you think you’ll feel in the morning when this is all you’ve wanted and you let him ruin it? you always said you were done letting people get the best of you.”

“he has a way of pissing me off and he’s just- he doesn’t care okay?! he sat up there and told lies, y/n. he doesn’t give a fuck about the job or the people or even all of the good we do and dreams we help make a reality. i...i should have been the one up there talking...” ah...so jealousy it was.

“ethan,” you laugh, not with humor but disbelief, “you know he’s as fake as they come. he doesn’t care like you do. you will have your time to shine and you would have tonight if you hadn’t ran away like a coward.”

“i don’t want to talk about this anymore,” he grumbled, opening the latch on the door in an attempt to get out and leave a conversation where he had to talk about how he felt.

“you can run all you want but one day these feelings will catch up with you and you’ll crash. you’ve opened up quite a bit with me over the past few months and i’ve noticed that change and i’ve been proud. more than anything i’m proud...but this has to stop,” you grab him by his bicep, forcing him to look at the tears that fell onto your cheek, ignoring the stiff silence without the aid of the radio and air conditioning, “you have to start believing in yourself like i do. who gives a fuck if he’s a man with five seconds of fame he didn’t even earn? you bust your ass every single day and you know it.”

his eyes shoot across your kind face, landing on your eyes that scream he’s sorry, he messed up, he wants to talk but doesn’t know what to say.

“no one can make you feel inferior without your permission remember?” you nod, trying your best to give him a smile. you suppose it looked more like a grimace.

“right,” he huffs, sucking in a breath like he’d been suffocating the entire ride home, and maybe he had. he’s pressing the palms of his hands flat against his eyes in an attempt to cover up whatever emotion threatened to expose him, “fuck him dude.”

“fuck him is right,” you chuckled dryly, flopping back against the leather back of the seat.

in the silence you waited. you must have been sitting together in the orange glow of the lights for thirty more minutes, the time passing slow. you watched him pull himself together, breathing even in an attempt to build up the nerve to talk once again.

finally he’d looked at you with those eyes you fell in love with. the hazel brightness that was a gate to who he truly was. a soft man with a traumatic story that wasn’t his fault. he fought hard for everything he had and he’d built a good life for himself. he was a different, better, man than he’d been the day he paid for your coffee without question. he was unsure of himself and self-conscious to the point he didn’t know what his purpose was. he’d bounced around from girl to girl, drank away his sadness...but you. you. you must have been his saint. his angel placed in his path for a reason. he couldn’t have felt shittier when he looked over at your wet cheeks and hair falling out of it’s elegant up-do.

you’d flinched at the feeling of his fingers trailing over the splotchy fingerprints on your wrist. this time, you welcomed the touch, staring at his hand tracing the damaged he’d caused. you tried not to bunch your dress up in your other hand.

“i hurt you.”

you nod slightly, not having the energy to respond with anything else.

“i embarassed you.”

another nod.

“i won’t do it again,” he whispered, fully ashamed of himself, “and i’ll...i’m gonna talk to Jeff on Monday. apologize for running off. i’ve never been that person and i acted before i could think straight. you were right. i earned this night and i shouldn’t have let him get to me so quickly. seeing him shouldn’t break me down. it was cowardice and i made an ass of us both and i’m sorry. i’ll try my best to make it right.”

smiling gently, you find yourself leaning over the console to kiss him on the apple of his cheek. his warmth shot sparks through your chest and stomach, something youre sure you’ll never get used to.

“we’ll figure this out together. that’s what we do. side by side. we figure shit out when it seems hopeless and when we look like idiots. it’s called being a team you dummy. thank you for apologizing. but...you know what i’d love?”

the light tone of your voice had him smiling in no time, his head rolling on his neck to look at you, head resting back against the seat.

“if i chilled the fuck out?” he teased with a grin.

“yes...but not what i was gonna say,” you continue smiling, raising his hand to kiss over his knuckles, “i was going to say...i’d love for us to go upstairs so i can get out of this ridiculously tight dress.”

inching towards you he nods, eyes latched on your lips. you feel his breath fan over your skin, goosebumps rising on your arms and legs. he’s moving slowly, enough that if your lips didn’t meet soon you’d get impatient.

“i’m sure we can make that happen,” he mumbles, so low you almost don’t hear him.

you know from this point on, you can trust him on his word. you can’t think to hesitate when he tilts your chin up to connect your lips in a gentle kiss. the fire kindling in your stomach burns brighter when he nips at your bottom lip, asking for permission. you part your lips eagerly, deepening the kiss.

the growth you’ve seen just from this conversation had you hoping for a future where he trusts you completely and didn’t shy away when his own mind punished him into make rash decisions. he’d owned up to his mistake and meant everything he’d said. it would be the last time alec got the best of him. it would be the last time he’d run away from a battle he knew he had the strength to conquer, especially with you at his side.

you’d deal with the consequences of his actions tomorrow, but for now the two of you lived in your own world - far away from alec, the banquet, and any other outside force that threatened to tear you apart. he’d placed his trust in you, and you’d do anything in your power to protect it.

#asks #e!concepts #ethan!concepts #cozyethan #i hope you like it!#it’s long af soooo

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kabura-maru · 4 years

Text

Did I write this au specifically for maid cafe Mitsuri? Maybe

Edit: @eindbr I know you usually reblog my Mitsuri content so if I dedicate this to you it’s not truly self indulgent, right?

Okay but there’s one paragraph its very obvious that this is very self indulgent pls forgive Mitsuri is my wifey I couldn’t not okay

—

Maid & Butler Day || Kimetsu Cafe || Mitsuri x Reader

Mitsuri Kanroji couldn’t help but steal however many glances at the quiet regular as her job would allow. It wasn’t all that easy, though, being the most popular waitress within the cafe.

Today was another one of the ever so many themed days. The staff seemed to enjoy them almost as much as the customers. Mitsuri was no exception, however the lingering gazes due to today’s costume seemed to get to her more than they ever had. She never usually minded the attention, but it wasn’t from the person she wanted attention from the most.

Speak of the devil! The pink haired waitress’s favorite customer had finally walked through the double glass doors of the cafe.

As usual, she had her laptop with her. Probably going to work on another school assignment, Mitsuri concluded.

“Oh, hello [Y/n]!” She greeted, quickly grabbing a menu and leading the other woman to her favorite seat next to the window

“Thank you, Mitsuri,” she said with a smile, setting her assortment of things on the table “maid day? I didn’t know that was this week.”

The waitress’s face flushed a color only rivaled by her silky locks. She noticed!

“Oh! Uhm... technically it’s Maid and Butler day due to our amount of male staff” the woman gestured over to wear Kyojuro and Sanemi stood behind the counter, dolled up in similar attire to the girl

“It’s still cute.” The girl mumbled “wouldn’t mind if this happened more often...”

Mitsuri hadn’t caught all of the other woman’s words, but enough to understand what she meant.

“Oh! Uh! Wh-what will you be having today?”

“Just the regular.” [Y/n] stated simply, opening up her laptop and arranging her other things around her

“Sure, sure, of course!”

A moment of hesitation kept Mitsuri’s feet planted firmly on the wood floor before she was finally able to will herself to head back to the counter.

Unbeknownst to the lovestruck woman, [Y/n]’s gaze followed her all the way back. She couldn’t even deny the way she admired how the dress hugged Mitsuri’s form and the way her green socks squished her thighs ever so slightly. The sight was captivating.

“Wahh!! Kyojuro!!” Mitsuri wailed quietly, pulling her manager away from the conversation he was having with Sanemi “I don’t know what to do!! [Y/n] said I looked cute!!”

Kyojuro’s eyes sparkled with joy at the news from Mitsuri. “That’s good! Progress!”

“But... what should I do? I keep chickening out every time I want to ask her out!”

Mitsuri couldn’t help but pout. Kyojuro thought it was adorable.

“Maybe try asking through a note or something...? Leave your number on her drink.”

“But that only works on to-go orders!”

“Oi! Quit fussing around, the lunch rush is gonna start soon” the gruff call of Sanemi cut Mitsuri and Kyojuro’s conversation short leaving the girl more unsure than when their conversation started

She sighed, resigning herself to another day of hopeless pining.

Not much time had passed before Mitsuri had brought [Y/n] her drink. Sanemi had done latte art of a cat in hers again. They exchanged appreciative smiles in silence before the waitress had turned to walk away, only [Y/n] wasn’t going to let her go that easy.

“Hey, Mitsuri?”

The waitress turned slightly, enough to glance casually at the girl. “Mmhmm?”

“You should.. uh... tell me when you guys are doing your next theme day.”

“Oh we have an instagr—“

“No I meant... for you specifically.. to tell me...”

The usually nonchalant woman was now blushing madly, clearly flustered in her attempts that seemed to soar over Mitsuri’s head.

“...?”

[Y/n] quickly turned to her notebook, ripping off a corner from one of the pages. She hastily scribbled on it in purple gel pen before offering her paper to Mitsuri.

“Here, my number. So you can tell me about events... and maybe we can meet up outside of the cafe or after your shift sometime...”

Mitsuri couldn’t hold back a quiet squeal while an excited smile took over her features.

“I’d absolutely love that!”

#kny #kimetsu no yaiba #kimetsu no yaiba x reader #kny x reader #kimetsu cafe #mitsuri x reader #kny mitsuri #kimetsu no yaiba mitsuri #mitsuri kanroji #kanroji x reader #kimetsu no yaiba kanroji #kny kanroji #kanroji mitsuri

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qtyanan · 5 years

Text

Flashback

Summary: “You and Mark hadn’t seen each other in years. Now he’s famous, and you didn’t think he’d recognize you.”

Pairing&Rating: NCT Mark Lee + female reader ; FLUFF, slight angst

a/n: this is longer than expected, and super sappy, and it took me forever to finish it... but wow, soft mark hours are REAL and im gonna cry over him gn

“Where do you think we’ll be in five years?”

“Mark, it’s like 3am, I thought you were asleep.”

“Well, you’re not asleep.”

You blindly reach towards Mark in the darkness, trying to hit him with a stuffed animal, causing him to snicker. Weekend sleepovers together were pretty normal, sleeping in the same bed wasn’t a worry from your parents since you’ve known each other for so long. Mark randomly saying things and asking questions about the past or future in the middle of the night was more common than sleeping

“Really, though. Do you think we’ll still be friends in five years?”

“I don’t know, probably,” you weren’t really sure on the answer, but you didn’t really have doubts. You two had been friends are as long as you can remember - classes, clubs, and sports were taken on as an unstoppable duo. Now you’re in eighth grade, half a year away from high school, and you’re closer than ever. It seems like nothing could tear you apart - and you liked it that way.

“I bet we will. I hope so, at least,” his voice sounds so sincere, it seems as if he had been thinking deeply on it for a while before he spoke of it.

“Yeah, me too.” With that, he let out a delighted chuckle, and you both fell asleep.

It had been six years. Six years and that conversation still plays in your mind late at night when you can’t sleep, painfully missing your favorite childhood friend.

Not even a month after that sleepover, he moved away, seemingly never to be heard from again. All of your friends in class pestered you about where he went, and it only upset you more - because he didn’t tell you he was leaving.

Him becoming a kpop star was probably the last thing you thought would happen to him; it was quite a slap in the face. BTS got you into kpop, then EXO, GOT7, now you’re into many different groups, including NCT. When you found them, and saw your prepubescent best friend, all grown up, dancing and rapping, you thought it was a dream.

Now they’re on a world tour, and Canada is one of the stops. You could never pay for a fansign ticket, but finally, you managed to save the money to be able to attend.

There were so many people around you. Many had some kind of merch, a lightstick or a sign. You could even count maybe 5 girls crying about meeting NCT.

Your hand was in your pocket, nervously sweating and gripping your ticket - second row, 5th seat. In your other hand, was a baby pink gift bag with a little stuffed animal in it. Years ago, Mark had left the little bear at your house, and it seemed like a nice time to give it back to him. The wait in line outside seemed to take forever, and it added to your anxiety.

You couldn’t understand why you were so anxious. He was your best friend, shouldn’t you be happy to see him? But you were so scared - what if he didn’t remember you? What if you went up to meet him, and he doesn’t even look twice? If you told someone, would they believe you? Of course not. The negatives in this situation made it hard for you to breathe.

The girls sitting next to you on either side both shifted excitedly. One had a mask on and didn’t turn your way, but the other smiled at you.

“Who’s your bias?” She asks, and you couldn’t control your smile. “Mark,” you say, and she smiles and nods. It was hard not to bias him, since you knew how he was off camera.

“Aw, he’s so cute. He’s my bias too, he seems like such a sweetheart!” She squealed in delight, causing you to blush a little bit.

This is it. As your row stood up and walked towards the fansign table, you felt like you could pass out. Yes, you were so excited to say hello to the other members, but it was almost the moment of truth - and you could only think of the bad.

As you took the seat in front of Mark, he didn’t look up at you at first. For that half second, you really admired him. He looked so grown up, you realized just how long it’s been. You suddenly felt a wave of so many emotions wash over you.

“Hi! What’s your name?”

“Y/N”

He had his sharpie in his hand, your album in the other, ready to sign it like everyone else - but he obviously froze. Your stomach dropped, gulping hard. He slowly looked up at you, his eyes wide and mouth open. You almost really did cry, but then,

“Y/n... [your full name]..?” He went quiet, and you smile, nodding at him, trying to hold back your tears.

“Hey, Mark, long time no see,” You chuckle, trying to joke so you don’t actually cry.

“Wow, yeah, oh my gosh, how have you been!?” He said quickly then started scribbling something on the inside of the album cover. You laugh at his awkwardness, shrugging at the question with a little “eh.”

“Here, I brought this for you.” You put the gift bag on the table, causing him to raise a brow at you. “It’s actually yours, from forever ago..” He looked inside the bag, and you noticed him take a big breath. He looked at you with big, glassy eyes - he felt this emotion too, he never thought he would see you again, or if you would even know where he was.

“Y/n... I’m sorry I didn’t tell you-” He spoke quietly, but you were being pushed along to the next member by the manager and the girl next to you. You gave Mark a small smile, then shifted over to Johnny.

“Y/n, huh? Mark talks a lot about you.” Johnny gives you a little smile, causing you to blush madly. You glance over at Mark, who’s blushing as well, and he gave you a quick glance with a happy smile.

When you finally arrive home, the day seemed like a dream. It was late at night, the drive home was only an hour, but you were tired. You kept playing the day in your head - he recognized you. Right away. That alone made you happy, but what you wouldn’t give to spend more time with him.

Oh yeah, he signed your album, but you didn’t look at it yet. When you opened it, you knew his writing - his signature, and then... a number? He wrote ‘Whatsapp’ in messy letters. Of course, you message him right away, hoping at this hour, he’d answer.

And he did. All you said was ‘hey.’

‘you still live in the same house, right?’

‘yeah, why??’

‘go to the park, i want to see you’

Your heart was beating in your ears. You didn’t think it would lead to that, but at the same time you expected it. It was late, yes, but you hurriedly slip your sneakers back on and go back out to your car.

You remember the park of course. It was mostly fields and trees, but you two would sneak out and play on the swings when you were younger. The last time you two went, Mark fell off his bike and hurt his ankle, so you had to call your mom and you two got in trouble. As you were driving, you snickered thinking about it.

But... You couldn’t help but to feel nervous. It had been years, you didn’t think at all that you were ever on his mind.

There wasn’t a single car on the road. The air was a bitter cold, it had snowed when you were on your way home, but none of it stayed on the ground. Every time you stopped at a red light, your stomach would turn again. You tried to calm yourself, but for some reason, it was just hard. You didn’t realize that you missed him this much. Now he had asked you to meet up at your childhood hangout place, and none of it seemed real.

The gates to the park were closed, and a padlock kept them shut. You knew it would be like that, so you parked down the street and cut through the trees to the lonely swing set. You looked around, you didn’t see anyone. But, sitting alone on a swing, was a single person. In the bright moonlight, you could just barely make out that it was Mark. His back was turned to you, and you could see that his head was hung low, and he was holding himself from the cold.

“Hey, Mark Lee,” Your voice startled him, but he stood and turned to face you. You couldn’t read his expression in the dim light. Neither of you walked closer for a moment, and the tension in the air made your shoulders go rigid. He didn’t say anything for a bit, he just stared at you.

“You look exactly the same.” He finally said, taking slow steps towards you. You look away, afraid to see the look in his eyes now that he’s close enough to see it. His words oddly made you feel warmer, but you still shivered when the wind blew.

“That’s surprising, it’s been six years.” You didn’t mean for your words to sound bitter, but they did. You hear him take in a heavy breath, and when he says nothing, you finally look up at him. His brown eyes glistened in the moonlight, and the shadows on his face made him look mature and defined. “You look different, though.” You say, a dry laugh following. “Older.”

“Well, it’s been six years.” He mocks you in the joking way, and you couldn’t hide your smile. This makes him smile as well, and while you looked away again, he couldn’t take his eyes off of you.

“It’s been... six years...” He sounds breathless this time, like it finally settled on him how long it’s been. This forces you to look back up, and he now has a sad smile. His eyes are apologetic, same as when he tried to speak to you at the event. In a way it hurt you. His face holds pain in the situation, but in a way, this was his doing. He was the one that left to be an idol. You didn’t hold that against him, but you were still upset that he left without telling you. You didn’t think that you two were ever going to part, and you still can’t believe that now his life has gone so differently from yours. He seems to be having an amazing life, but you’re lonely without him, and for some reason... mad.

But the way he looked at you, you didn’t show your anger - it melted away when he put his hand on your arm.

“I’ve missed you, Y/n. You don’t have to believe me, but I think about you all the time.” You wouldn’t believe him normally, but even Johnny said it. “Y/n, huh? Mark talks a lot about you.”

You chew on your lip nervously, you have no idea what to say to him. What does a person do in a situation like this? You just stare at him for a moment. He’s closer to you now, and you see just how tired he is. His blonde hair is messy, different from how you saw him earlier.

“Are you okay, Mark? You look... so tired.”

“Mark, please, calm down.” Johnny tries to make Mark sit down, but the younger is pacing across the hotel room, almost pulling out his own hair. “I am so stupid!! How could I not have said more?! It’s been years and I barely said anything!! She probably hates me for leaving...” Mark’s almost on the verge of tears as he speaks frantically, and all he wants to do is scream.

“She came today, so she doesn’t hate you. Just talk to her some more-”

There’s a ding from Mark’s phone. He quickly picks it up, then looks at Johnny.

“It’s Y/n. Oh god, what do I say?!”

“Maybe you should go and see her. You said we’re pretty close to your hometown right?”

“Yeah...yeah! But how will I meet her anywhere?”

“I’ll drive you, just tell her to meet you somewhere.”

The moments that happened before he came here played in his head, but he said nothing to you about it. He just gave you a small smile and shrugged his shoulders.

“I just haven’t been sleeping well. Surprise, surprise, right?” You just give him an awkward smile. This made you chuckle. He’s always had trouble sleeping, he used to tell you how his mind was moving too fast for him to fall asleep. He always wanted to listen to soft songs to sleep, or he would ask you to sing along to a song you knew well.

“I guess things like that will never change.” You say, and for some reason, your words lingered in the cold air for a moment. Without any thought, you put your hand over Mark’s, feeling how cold his fingers are. You took both of his hands into your jacket sleeves, something you used to do as you two waited for the school bus during winter.

He feels another wave of emotion flood over him, and this time, he can’t seem to keep the tears away. He sucks in a shaky breath, looking down at your hands.

“Mark...” You feel this aching pain in your chest at seeing him like this.

“I-I’m sorry, Y/n...” His voice cracks, and he can’t bring himself to look up at you.

“Mark, look at me.” Your voice is soft but stern enough for him to obey, his body relaxing slightly at the sweet look in your eyes. “I’m not mad at you. I never was.” You tell him, holding on tightly to his hands now.

“R-really?”

You can see his tears glistening in the moonlight, and you release one of your hands to wipe his cheeks. He flutters his eyes closed, resting his face against your hand.

“Really, Mark. I’m so proud of you. I just want you to be happy.”

His lip quivers at your words, and he closes his eyes tightly. “I’m not happy. Not without you being my best friend.”

The feeling his words gave you made you want to burst into tears, but instead, you threw yourself into his chest, wrapping your arms around his neck. He doesn’t hesitate to hold you, gripping your jacket with a death grip, as if he knows you’ll disappear any second. You stand in silence for what feels like forever. His embrace doesn’t loosen at all, and you’re okay with it. You miss his hugs, his smell and his warmth. He’s taller and more muscular now, making the way he holds you make you feel even warmer.

“Please... keep contact with me, okay? Please...” You say into his shoulder, feeling a little ridiculous that you begged him like that. He takes a deep breath into your hair as if imprinting your smell into his soul.

“I promise, Y/n. I don’t want to leave you again. God, I’ve missed you so much...” He loosens his arms around you just enough to be able to look you in the eye, watching how the moon and stars seemed to be held in your eyes.

The thought of being able to see and talk to him more made a weight lift off your shoulders. A happy smile forms on your face as you nod at him, and he nods back.

“So, uh... I had to sneak out to see you... I should probably get back before my manager kills me.” He awkwardly chuckles, but even with saying that, he doesn’t let you go - God please, not yet, just a little longer.

“Yeah... My mom might kill me if she finds out I’ve stayed out so late.” You giggle, making his chest warm up. You wouldn’t believe how much he has missed your laugh.

“I’ll text you, okay?” He finally lets go of you, and you shiver from the cold air once again. He nod at him, waving goodbye to him as he runs to Johnny’s car. You stand there for a moment, watching as they pull away. It takes a moment for you to actually comprehend what just happened, and you ended up standing there for almost 5 minutes. Your phone chimes, and you look down to see another message from Mark.

‘get home safe. I love you, dork.’

bitch im so fkin soft

#mark lee #mark lee scenarios #mark lee fluff #nct #superm #nct scenarios #nct imagines #nct one shot #kpop #mark lee au #nct dream #nct u #nct 127 #kpop writing

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lu-undy · 4 years

Text

Chapter 6 - SBT

Here is chapter 6! Let me know what you guys think so far! ;)

Mundy drove to a quiet spot in the middle of the desert. He needed some peace and quiet to think.

"Roight, what do I know…?"

The Australian was lying on his van's rooftop, his eyes on the night sky and yet not seeing the stars.

"They did it in two times. What's that supposed to mean…?"

He liked the desert. It was a place of solace, a place of calm and paradoxically enough, despite its impressive size, the desert was where the tall man felt the most intimacy. The dust there knew him better than anyone.

Really? He wondered.

Yeah, actually.

The dust knew him better than anyone. The cacti would hear him think and the boulders would answer in the echo of his own voice.

He shook his head to shoo away the thought and not fall in the trap of dwelling on it too much.

"Roight, the 'gators, the bloody 'gators. Why would they get the job done in two times? They had more than enough cars to get them all in one go… They'd all have fitted!"

He sighed as he realised what his comeback in the business meant.

"Bloody hell…"

He thought he had torn that page of his existence and burnt it away.

"Bloody hell…"

He had sworn to himself that he wouldn't take it back again. It was insane. Insane and unreasonable. Insane, unreasonable and madly dangerous. It had cost him too much by the past, way too much.

"No."

No. He wouldn't take the job. He would call Johnson first thing in the morning and he would refuse.

No! It was bloody crazy! He had lost too much and for what? For animals? Animals?

He had been clawed, bit, punched, kicked and shot. All for animals, some of them no one even cared about…! No one, but him.

Crazed gunman.

His father was right. He had become exactly that…

Mundy sighed and opened another beer.

So that was it, eh? He would abandon those alligators to basically die…? Hm, and why not? No one had saved him when he had needed it, when he was at the bottom of the pit, no one, no man or animal came to help. So why on Earth should he help rich-as-all-hell Johnson and his bloody crocodiles?!

No one had helped the solitary Australian man in a van. Like a sad ice cream truck, he would drive her around without any music on, dragging her around with him. She was more than a home on wheels, she was his home, and his best friend. She was all he had left. At least, she had been there.

He would sleep in the safety of her arms, he would talk to her, and she was by far his most helpful companion. She knew how to listen to him when he needed an ear and was there when he had moments of happiness, to celebrate with him. Although… Now that he thought about it, he couldn't remember any such moment since… Well, since a long time now that didn't seem that long. The past years seemed to all mash together to an inconsistent soup of non-events through which one thing had persisted. His solitude.

That was his second best friend, after the van. At first he had hated her and couldn't stand her. She had invited herself in his life flinging the door to his heart wide open and without knocking. She had erupted in the most brutal fashion.

Then she made him like her. He didn't want anything to do with her but she cleverly managed to get him to do exactly what she wanted. Ha, some people say that a man only sees reason when he meets a woman. Those are lucky bastards who haven't met Solitude first. He hated that she controlled him, he hated that she had cut all his ties with his friends and any human contact that remained, she killed as easily as his kukri sliced a juicy melon.

Mundy was her prisoner. The only way to break free from her, was to embrace his condition and see it not like a constraint, but like a normal life. And so he did. He let her have her way without resisting anymore and had grown to like it. She had brought him peace and more free time that he ever thought was possible to have.

For what? Well, for the last thing he had, namely, himself.

No one cared about him, so he had grown to care about no one but himself. Hidden behind the safety of his tinted glasses and under his brown hat, he felt as comfortable as a snail in his shell. He was sheltered, safe and protected in a zone where things were familiar and usual, and where he was the only one in charge. His best companion, Solitude, controlled everything so nothing went wrong and nothing surprised him in a regrettable way.

That's how he had chosen to live for almost a decade now. Some would say it was sad, others would argue there was no point in living if it is to go through the days like that. Maybe they were right and he was just organically decaying, withering one day after the next, growing older and waiting for his conclusion to bow goodbye to no one but his van…?

Maybe.

Yet something had planted the seed of doubt in his heart. Something was tickling the back of his mind and almost his conscience.

Yes no one cared about those alligators and in all honesty, now, neither did Mundy. But… When he had entered the enclosure, when he smelt those familiar scents of wilderness, when his hands touched the wood of the log, the blood on the wall, the dust of the tracks left by the trucks… When he started seeing the scene in his head, those men shooting the alligators, dragging them out and driving off…

He had felt something that Solitude had taken away from him and jealously kept away. He could barely recall what she was called, that other one. The one that made him see the orange of the desert, the blue of the sky, the green of the cacti. The one who made him smell the warmth and not the bitterness of his coffee, the one who made him taste the sweetness of the apples that he now had gotten used to crushing between his teeth not to enjoy them, but because crushing something outside of him was much better than inside.

What was left to crush in his little empty self now anyway? Pff, nothing! Solitude, like the very efficient poison that she was, had done one hell of a spring cleaning and had got rid of anything that would make him feel any shred of life in his body.

Life! That was her name! That's what she was called! That's the one that Solitude had taken away from him! His life!

He had felt alive again in that enclosure, for a fleeting moment, yes, but he had felt it! His heart pumping, his eyes excitedly looking for clues, his mind eagerly trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together. Mind you, he hadn't felt that in years!

So now he was faced with a choice.

Either stay with Solitude and repeat his days like the verses of a song he knew too well, comfortably nested in rituals that she had laid for him; or risk it and take his life back, let himself work again, let himself feel whatever life would throw at him. Make the bet that he could find those alligators and get them to safety, for them, for himself and for his life. Screw Johnson long and large, he couldn't care less about the man. There was something about rich people that he couldn't stand. Their arrogance in thinking that they were owed everything because they had enough paper notes and metal coins to get it. He hated that.

Besides, what was left to lose now, hm?

Mundy's eyes darted left and right as if he was looking in his own head, trying to find something that he would regret if he came to lose it. But nothing came to his mind… Absolutely nothing.

Solitude or Life?

Live his days like photocopies of each other or risk it all and feel again?

His mind was set and he slept on his decision. Solitude would be upset and would no doubt try and catch him back, but Mundy was ready to fight. He had survived long enough, time to live. Life was extending a helpful hand to him. Why not accept it when he had nothing left to lose?

The next morning, the Australian was driving to find somewhere to get his breakfast from. He looked for a place he hadn't been in a long time as the perspective of being recognised and dragged in small talk by anyone made him gag in his head.

Ah but no… Not anymore… He had set his mind to cheat on Solitude and take risks.

And it seemed to him that the van drove him as opposed to the other way around. She parked in that same place he had had a coffee the day before.

"Roight…" Mundy took a deep breath and took a seat at the same table he had the day before, on the terrace. He looked around him. The city was waking up and people were commuting either to work, or parents with their children to school. The sun shone beautifully and not too brightly. All in all it seemed like a good day.

“Look who came back…!” It was the same waitress. He raised his eyes to her.

“Oh, hey there.”

“Good to see you again. You liked my coffee, eh?”

Mundy smiled.

“Well, was good enough for me to come back apparently.”

“Yeah, apparently.”

They exchanged a short chuckle.

“Should I get you the same?”

“Yeah. Uhm, actually, could I get a muffin with that?”

“Sure, which one? We’ve got chocolate with chocolate chips, classic with chocolate chips and classic with berries.”

“Uhm, classic with berries would be nice, yeah.”

“Alright…” She scribbled everything on her small notepad. “Anything else with that?”

“Nah, that’ll be more than fine.”

“Alright, I’ll be right back.”

“Thanks.”

“You’re welcome, beautiful smile you have.”

And on that note, she turned her heels and went away, leaving the Aussie surprised and confused.

Beautiful smile you have.

He didn’t know what he looked like when he smiled anymore but she had found it beautiful. Mundy looked at his reflection on the metal sugar bowl. It was distorted given the shape of it but that was the only thing he could see himself on now. He tried smiling again and stared. Was that beautiful? He stopped smiling and looked away, pushing the sugar bowl further from him.

No, he didn’t look anything like that, if anything, he looked strange when he smiled, he almost pitied himself…

“There we are…!”

The waitress stopped him right before he fell in a dangerous abyss.

“Black coffee and muffin with berries for the handsome man with the van…!”

She placed the coffee mug and the pastry on the table in front of him.

“Thanks.”

“Oh, what’s wrong? Did I get your order wrong?” The waitress got her notepad and flipped the pages quickly.

“No, nah, it’s fine.”

“You’re a very bad liar…”

She took a seat opposite him.

“Tell me.”

“Tell you what?” He asked, trying to earn some time and come up with an excuse.

“Tell me what’s wrong.”

“Bah… It’s work stuff…”

“What is it that you do in your job?”

“I’m a hunter.”

“Ooh… What kind of animals d’you hunt?”

“The ones no one else can.”

Her eyes lit up at the mere thought of the level of danger that it involved.

“You got me interested there! Tell me more…!”

“Well, I don’t know... “ Mundy removed his hat and scratched his head.

“Oh, c’mon!” She insisted.

“That’s no sheila’s talk, y’know…”

“Who cares, imagine I’m a bloke and tell me, please…?”

Mundy sighed.

“I uh… I go after poachers.”

“You hunt poachers?”

“In a way, yeah.”

“D’you kill them?”

“No! Nah, never… I just give them a good fright and make them understand that they have to stop.”

“Hm, you make them understand, eh?” She raised an eyebrow.

“Yeah, I think it’s the best way to put it.”

“So what’s it like?” She asked.

“What?”

“How does it work? Go on, give me an example!”

Mundy was at a loss. She seemed to enjoy talking to him and asking him about his job. Of course he was mildly sugarcoating it. No sheila needed to hear the exact way that he dissuaded the poachers to ever take a job again. But maybe that was his chance. Maybe that waitress was a first point of contact with a fellow human being.

“Well, there was this time where uh, you know the kangaroo and emu reserve?”

“The one outside of town?”

He bit in his muffin and nodded.

“Yeah.”

“Yeah I see where it is.”

“Well, they had some problems cause they kept on losing the kangaroos. Thing is, those big ones don’t really have natural predators and certainly not around that reserve so they called me in. I took a bit of time to work out that it was a group of poachers who’d slip in at night and steal a few every so often. I waited for them to strike again and caught them red-handed.”

“Is it dangerous?”

Mundy bobbed his head left and right as he continued eating his muffin.

“Depends. For a few ‘roos, nah. People don’t want the kangaroos for their fur or anything. It’s just for their meat, which is a bit more expensive than beef, yeah, but not that ridiculous. It’s when they go for more rare or more pricey animals that it usually gets a bit more difficult.”

“Why?”

He gulped down and took another bite before answering.

“Cause usually if you want your hand on say some snake’s skin or some crocs’, you’re ready to make a fortune and you’re ready to pay whatever it costs to get it. You know that after you sell it, you’re gonna be filthy rich, that’s why…”

“Oh, I see… Do you ever get hurt and stuff?”

Mundy frowned as he wiped his hands on a paper towel.

“Oh yeah, countless times. It’s not an easy job on the body and on the mind but eh, gets the gas paid for the van and it’s honest work so can’t complain.”

Mundy had finished his muffin and was sipping on his coffee.

“Must be intense at times, yeah?”

“Yeah, sometimes. Although most of the time, nothing happens really.”

“Which I guess is quite nice, you got some free time, eh?” She answered.

He looked her in the eye.

“Yeah, yeah it isn’t that bad.”

Mundy finished his coffee and leaned back on his chair. He let the silence settle before he tilted his head on the side and asked.

“What about you?”

The waitress opened wide eyes and her cheeks turned pink.

“Well, I’m a waitress here.”

“Can see that, yeah.”

They both chuckled.

“You like it here?”

“Yeah, job’s easy and pays the bills and rent…”

“But..?” He anticipated.

“But I wish I could do something more… y’know… better.”

“What would that be?” He asked.

“I don’t know. Something with plants. I’ve always liked gardening but eh, bills aren’t gonna pay themselves.”

“It’s not too late to look for somethin’ in that area. Plenty of parks and stuff here.” He answered.

“Yeah but I don’t know anythin’ about it. Used to garden with my Granny when I was a little girl. She had a massive garden, always green no matter the season. We used to take care of it together.”

“You could try and learn. I’m sure there are places that could teach you or somethin’.”

“Yeah, I suppose I could…” She sighed.

“What’s stoppin’ you?” He asked.

“I don’t really have the time with this job.”

“Got kids to take care of at home?” Mundy asked innocently but only realised that she didn’t after he saw a flash in her eyes.

“Nah, nah I’m alone.”

“Well then you could try and find sort of uh, night classes, or something that suits you for the hours, to still work here at the same time, I s’ppose.”

“Yeah, I suppose you’re right.”

She smiled.

“What’s your name?”

“M.”

“Just M?”

He nodded.

“In that case, I’m E.”

She extended her hand to him. He stared at it for an awkward second. It seemed like he had been parachuted in the human race and didn’t know the customs of it… But he eventually shook her hand.

“Nice to meet you M.”

“Same.”

She stood up and took her tray.

“Right, better get back to it before I get shouted at.”

“Yeah, sure. I’ll walk to the counter with you, I need to go.”

He took his hat off the table and followed her in. She went behind the counter and he paid for what he had.

“Uhm, M?”

“Hm?” He answered as he put his change back in his wallet.

“Come back tonight, at about 8.”

He raised his head to her and his eyebrows twitched for an instant.

“I should be done with my shift by then.”

Mundy’s eyes widened.

“Okay, alright…”

He turned his back and walked to the door.

“Don’t forget!”

His grip hardened on the door handle. He turned to her and nodded.

“I won’t.”

#tf2 sniper #tf2 spy #sniperspy #SBT

11 notes · View notes

bangtan-gal · 5 years

Text

How to Break a Heart Step 1

Summary: The biggest lie the universe has ever told is that everyone finds love at some point in their lives. Warnings: swearing, angst, fluff, implied smut, underage drinking and drug use Word Count: 3.1k A/n: i will be doing a tag list for this series, so if you would like to be tagged, please dm, comment, or send in an ask!

Jung Jaehyun

Junior Year—2012

He was definitely an idiot, but for what it was worth, he was pretty dang cute.

“Have you ever noticed the way his eyes sparkle when he smiles?” You sighed, cupping your cheek in your hand. Your friend huffed beside you, not even looking up as she continued to work on the lab report.

“Have You Ever noticed how you act as if you’d sell your soul to him?” She retorted, waving her hand in front of your face. You snorted, pushing her hand away and continuing to ogle at him. The corners of his eyes crinkled as he laughed at something his friend said. His hand was moving animatedly, coming dangerously close to spilling the beaker of chemicals everywhere.

It would stain and ruin his clothes if it spilled.

“Believe me, if he was a succubus of some sort, I wouldn’t even hesitate to give him my soul,” you muttered.

A string of cuss words fell from his friend’s lips as the beaker fell from the table and shattered on the floor.

Green goop spread out along the floor and you were knocked from your trance.

“You shouldn’t date a guy for his looks, Y/N,” Lia reprimanded, still scribbling madly away at her lab report. “Especially not a guy like Jaehyun, whose thoughts are always on basketball and what kind of trouble he can get into next weekend.”

You sighed, glancing down at the worksheet in front of you and assessing the questions. You wished she wasn’t, but LIa was right. Jaehyun was only the glorious prince in the scenarios you created, not in the world that spun around you. In this world, Jaehyun only knew you as the student who sat behind him in chemistry and occasionally offered him help on his homework. Jaehyun was just a basketball player with a pretty smile.

Class ended as the teacher dismissed everyone so the mess could be cleaned up. You and Lia hurried down the hallway and exited the building silently. It was cold and the ground was covered in clumps of white. The wind was harsh against your face and you pulled your jacket up, looking over at Lia. She brushed her hair out of her face and then pursed her lips.

“What about Mark? Hasn’t he asked you out?” She asked.

You stuffed your hands in your pockets and shrugged, following her through the parking lot.

“He’s my brother’s best friend, that doesn’t even feel right,” you huffed, blowing a piece of hair out of your face. “Plus… it’s Mark.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

You slid into her car, brushing the snow off your shoulders and hair. Lia started the car and then turned to you, raising an eyebrow in curiosity.

“It’s Mark. The boy I used to play hide n’ seek with, the boy who put snakes and spiders in my backpack in middle school; Mark, who sometimes would hug me through my tears and paid more attention to me than my own brother ever did,” you explained. Mark was a good guy, but not in the way you wanted. He was a good guy in the way where he was like an older brother who threatened to beat up anyone who broke your heart.

“Well, at least he has a heart, unlike Jung Jaehyun.”

You were trying not to fall asleep as you waited for class to start. You had been unable to sleep the night before, your mind repeatedly mulling over what Lia had said to you. Should you have given Mark a chance? But it just felt wrong. He was your brother’s best friend, that was almost worse than dating your brother.

“Aye, Jaehyun!” You forced yourself not to perk up at the sound of his name or his cheerful reply. He was cute, but he was stupid and the epitome of trouble. Lia sat down beside you, smacking the back of your head teasingly.

“Damn, wake up,” she chortled.

The bell rang and your Chemistry teacher stood up.

“Today, we’re going to be switching up some seat partners… due to an event yesterday,” he announced. Jaehyun and Johnny both chuckled. You sighed, sitting up in your seat and watching as the teacher’s gaze ran over the class. His eyes landed on you.

“Y/N.”

Shit.

“Could you switch seats with Johnny, please? Maybe you’ll keep Jaehyun in shape,” he huffed, sending an annoyed glance the boy’s way. Your throat closed up as you stood up, grabbing your backpack and bumping shoulders with Johnny as you passed him. You fumbled to sit down and then cast a stare over your shoulder at Lia. Her eyes darted between you and Johnny and then she shrugged.

The whole time you found yourself aware of how close the boy was to you. His knees brushed against yours and if you shifted slightly, your shoulders would be touching. You couldn’t focus on the teacher’s lecture as he spun his pencil and would occasionally lose his hold on it and it would skitter across the table. You pinched your eyes shut, trying to remove his smile from your memory.

“Hey.” Goosebumps erupted along your skin as he leaned closer. “Were you paying attention at all?”

You opened your eyes and side-eyed him.

“No…”

He leaned back in his seat, a curious stare running over you. Then he turned around, brightly smiling at the boy behind him.

“What are we supposed to be doing?” He asked.

The boy didn’t look impressed.

“Weren’t you listening?”

“Damn, tough crowd,” Jaehyun muttered to you and despite the situation, you found yourself smiling.

“You have a pretty smile.”

The compliment took by such a surprise that your smile disappeared. You looked up, meeting his bright stare. His dimples were on full display. Your heart thumped in your ears and you were certain your face was red.

Jaehyun tilted his head.

“Can I see it again?”

You should’ve been working, but when the boy overdramatically pouted, you smiled again as a small laugh escaped you. Jaehyun smiled back, his eyes flicking over your face. As the two of you continued to stare at each other, you couldn’t help but feel conscious. This was weird.

“It’s Y/N, right?” He asked.

You cleared your throat.

“Yeah, that’s me,”

He grinned. “I remember you—Freshman year in PE class, you told the teacher that he should be the one running instead of us.”

If your face wasn’t red before, it definitely was now.

A dry laugh escaped you and you nodded warily.

“Yup… once again, that’s me,” you squeaked. He threw back his head and laughed.

“Damn, I remember really wanting to talk to you—that was so cool. I didn’t have the guts to though, you seemed kind of scary,” he murmured, shaking his head. His gaze dropped to the desk and he started to trace the worksheet. You ran a hand through your hair, teeth working on your bottom. He was scared to talk to you? Another smile bloomed on your face, but this time it was different, it was wide and goofy and all you could think about was how the two of you were basically in the same boat.

“Well, I’m not all that scary,” you teased softly, unable to look at him as you started to work on the sheet. “I might bite a little bit though.”

It was a weird and tentative start, but it was a start nonetheless. The two of you started to talk more often and continued to work together in chemistry. It grew from there, becoming more than just homework. You talked before and after class, would go the extra length to see each other during lunch or study hall. Eventually, you got his number and the two of you started to hang out outside of school.

You learned quickly that Jaehyun wasn’t the perfect prince you saw in your mind, but he wasn’t some heartless monster like how Lia tried to depict him. He was… well, he was human. He sometimes forgot about your plans, but always made up for it with paragraphs of apologies and horribly made cookies.

wA day into your friendship with Jaehyun, you learned not to eat anything he made himself.

“I don’t think you understand how this works,” you grumbled, frowning at him. He frowned back.

“It’s four significant figures—”

“No, it’s three,” you argued.

“How?”

“When you multiply, it’s the smallest amount,” you explained, pointing to the numbers on the problem, “so therefore, it’s rounded to three.”

Jaehyun groaned, collapsing against the table. “I fucking hate Chemistry.”

You shook your head with a laugh and laid your head beside his. “The year is almost done and then you won’t have to worry about it anymore.”

“Watch me fail the final,” he whined, turning to look at you. His face was extremely close and this close you could see just how long his lashes were. They curled up against his brow bone. You smiled, not realizing how obvious your visual trace of his face was. He had defined cheekbones, with a soft spray of freckles dotting along them and over the bridge of his nose. His lips were light pink, but were darker near the middle.

Jaehyun smiled back at you.

“Hey,” you whispered.

“Hey.”

His lips were warm. They were soft. Your eyes fluttered shut as his fingers ran up your arm, your neck, and over your jaw. His thumb massaged the area underneath your ear as his fingers played with your hair. You felt dazed as you pulled back, eyes still closed and soft breaths escaping you. Finally, you opened your eyes, a tilted smile on your face. Jaehyun chuckled, pulling back a bit more, pink spreading along his face.

“God, I’ve wanted to do that for a while,” he muttered. You looked down, still smiling, Jaehyun’s hand dropped from your head to your hand, his fingers curling over yours.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

Jaehyun twirled you around. It was a warm day, the sun bearing down on both of you. You were certain you’d never seen him smile any wider.

Summer had started a month ago, but your summer truly started today. Jaehyun had been gone on vacation in Northern Europe. Seeing him again was like a breath of fresh air. You’d missed his smile, his hugs, his laugh… you just missed him.

“I missed you so much,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “You don’t even know.”

You laughed. “I don’t even know? I missed you more than you could ever imagine!”

He smirked and kissed you again.

“Maybe,” he chirped. His eyes ran along your face. Silence grew between you. You smiled nervously, tucking a piece of your hair behind your ear.

“What are you doing?” “Commiting you to memory,” he sighed. You snorted, elbowing him in the ribs.

“That’s creepy.”

He laughed.

“Fine, I was just thinking about how you’ve become prettier in the past month,” he explained, “or I have a sucky memory.”

You didn’t let your smile falter, even though your heart seemed to fall. Something wasn’t right. It was like there was something pulling in your gut. Jaehyun was acting the same, but there was a dark flicker in his eyes. A flicker that you didn’t like.

“Hey, you okay?” He asked.

You nodded, forcing your smile to widen.

“Yeah.”

He wrapped an arm around your shoulders. His smile was wide and dimples on full display. The kiss he pressed to your temple was soft and sweet. You leaned into him and brushed away the earlier look. Jaehyun was just tired. He’d been on a plane for 12 hours and came to see you right away.

“Oh yeah, I got you something,” Jaehyun said, “close your eyes.”

You obliged, letting your eyes flutter shut. There was a soft rustling and then Jaehyun stepped behind you. Something cold and delicate was placed around your neck. You opened your eyes slowly, glancing down at the necklace. It was rose-gold and glimmered in the sunlight. A rose-quartz hung at the end, a daisy dry-pressed in the center. It was stunning.

“I remember you talking about a rose-quartz ring you used to have and how much you loved it. And you love daisies because of Narcissus, that Greek myth dude,” he whispered. Your heart raced, tracing the gem carefully. Then you turned around, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips and pulled back with a grin.

“Thank you, I absolutely love it!” You mumbled against his lips. Your arms wrapped around his neck and you stood there in your front yard, the two of you swaying back and forth. The light breeze tugged at your hair, twirling it around your head. Jaehyun’s eyes sparkled under the sunlight.

He looked ethereal.

Hell, he was ethereal.

Your mind wandered back to before you started dating, when Lia used to tell you that he was toxic: that he was just a boy who ruined others lives. Yet, the only thing you’d seen from him was the exact opposite. He was sweet and caring and could be a total goofball at times. He’d always put you above him and would go to great lengths to make sure you were happy. You had never been happier before your time with Jaehyun; you always felt like you were on cloud nine with him.

“How was Europe?” You queried. The two of you were still awkwardly slow dancing in your front yard.

He smiled and let his forehead rest against yours.

“It was really fun. You don’t realize just how pretty it actually is until you’re there,” he commented. His arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer to him.

“What was your favorite part?” Jaehyun thought for a second before opening his mouth.

“Is that Jung Jaehyun?”

Jaehyun turned around and then pulled away from you, smile widening as he waved at a group of his friends. You deflated slightly, watching as Yuta’s car pulled up against the curb. The three boys stepped out, all of them clapping him on the back and loudly greeting him. Johnny winked at you and ruffled your hair, treating you as if you were Jaehyun’s younger sister instead of his girlfriend.

“Hey Y/N,” Taeil chirped.

“Hi,” you grumbled, your gaze flicking back to Jaehyun, wondering if he would shoo them away so you could spend more alone time together.

“I’m throwing a party tonight, the two of you should come,” Yuta jumped in, wide smile on full display. His hair had been dyed red at the end of the school year, but now it was mostly faded to a weird mix of deep brown and faded red. “Nine at my place.”

You opened your mouth, ready to decline, but Jaehyun beat you to it.

“We’ll see you there,” he hummed, fist bumping Yuta. The boy smirked and then glanced over at you before sending a sly look Jaehyun’s way.

“Unless you’re gonna be too busy,” he giggled.

And sometimes you forgot why Yuta was the most annoying one of Jaehyun’s friends.

The trio drove off, leaving the two of you to awkwardly stand and watch them leave. As the car disappeared around the corner, you turned to your boyfriend, arms crossed over your chest. You raised an eyebrow.

“Aren’t even gonna ask if I actually want to go?”

“Babe I just th—”

“You just thought that I’d want to spend my first day with my boyfriend at a loud ass party?” You snapped, taking a step back. Jaehyun grabbed your hand, dragging you towards him.

“Look, Y/N, I know you don’t like parties, but I haven’t seen my pals just as long as I haven’t seen you,” he huffed, “and I want to see them, but I also want to spend time with you. Just this once? I promise if you hate it, we can come back here and watch Finding Nemo.”

You sighed, staring at him through your lashes.

“Fine, but if we go home, you can’t complain about the movie,” you muttered. He grinned at you.

“Not even a little?”

You gave him a deadpanning stare.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

The second you stepped into the party, you hated it, but for Jaehyun’s sake, you didn’t give up on it right away. The reek of alcohol and the underlying smell of smoke underneath was sickening. Teenagers roamed around the house, each smelling like walking gyms. Johnny saw the two of you immediately and hurried over, wrapping his arms around both your shoulders. He smiled at the two of you.

“Let’s get the both of you drink, shall we?”

The last thing you wanted was a drink, but you followed them to the kitchen either way. Jaehyun immediately moved throughout the cabinets, making himself his own drink as Johnny turned to you.

“Beer or vodka?” You crossed yours arms, eyes wandering boredly around the place.

“Just water.”

Johnny raised an eyebrow. “Seriously? How boring can you get?” “How much of a douche can you be?” You retorted. He snorted, reeling away from you as if you had physically hit him. No more comments were made as Jaehyun finally had a drink in his hand and made his way over to you. You told yourself you’d make it an hour before you went home.

Just an hour.

“Jae!” Lucas shouted, appearing between you two, “You gotta come reclaim your spot as King bro.”

Jaehyun laughed, teasingly pulling away from the boy.

“No no, I’m content to just watch you idiots do it,” he chuckled. Yuta suddenly popped into the room, wrapping an arm around Jaehyun’s neck. He ruffled his hair and then grinned at you.

“You’re the idiot, considering how many times you won.”

That was the only coaxing Jaehyun needed to let himself be dragged through the dining room and the living room where the beer pong table was set up. You followed wearily, sending glares at anyone who brushed against you. Jaehyun handed you his phone and took off his jacket, moving to one end of the table. You sat down on the couch, clutching his coat tightly in your hands as you watched.

You hated this so much.

You could already see how this would end.

Jaehyun would be drunk off his ass by the end of the night and you wouldn’t see him for the next couple of days as he nursed away his hangover.

You watched the first several tosses, before your annoyance over took any pride you had in your boyfriend. You opened his phone to check the time and were greeted by a couple text messages. Some were from friends, one from his mom, and two from someone named ‘Sylvia.’ You weren’t one to snoop, but as his phone suddenly lit up from another next message from Sylvia, your curiosity got the best of you. You unlocked his phone.

Hey, I’ve missed you

Had lots of fun with you, never been with someone that fiery

Your stomach lurched and you didn’t even care to read the last message.

You stood up, tossing his coat and phone on the ground. Tears were brimming at the corners of your eyes and the sudden urge to puke was almost unbearable. Your hand covered your mouth as you glanced up, meeting Jaehyun’s stare. You saw it his eyes—that same dark flicker before they widened in horror, realizing exactly what had just happened. Tears were already sliding down your face as you desperately shook your head in disbelief. Then you left, sprinting from the house as if demons were hot on your tail.

Running away from the nightmare that had just occurred.

You stumbled out in the dark street, eyes darting around. None of the drunk or high teens spared you a glance as you started to hurry down the sidewalk. Your skin was flushed and your heart was racing as you tried to pretend that you were fine. That what just happened was all a dream.

That Jaehyun was just a dream.

Everything you gave him was only a daydream and now you were awake.

And Jaehyun doesn’t exist.

♡🎔🎔🎔🎔🎔🎔

324 notes · View notes

gayforheadphonesgirl · 5 years

Text

Falling Back Into You (Chapter 2)

(A/N): I’m back with Chapter 2 of SingleMom! Alex. Wanted to upload an update before I start my work week tomorrow. Sorry for any errors, especially when it comes to tenses lol. This isn’t proofread in any way. Hope you guys like it.

(Y/N) had gotten back to her loft after walking Alex and Mia home. She absentmindedly made her way to her couch and sat.

The retired soccer star put a hand on her heart and tried to still the pounding inside.

Did Alex Morgan just really walk back into her life after all these years?

She chuckled to herself at how much the forward affects her still. It's been what, 15 years since she developed a life-shattering crush on Alex?

Of course, her being married to Servando at the time and her being straight as a ruler meant that nothing ever really happened.

Just a useless lesbian (Y/N) secretly in love with one of her closest friends.

Her thoughts shift to Mia and how much she resembles her heart-strong mother.

An ear-splitting smile made its way to (Y/N)'s face as she replayed today's events.

Man, was she still whipped for Alex Morgan.

*flashback*

(Y/N) and the USWNT just won their second World Cup in a row after beating the Netherlands in France.

She was ecstatic as she broke down in tears in the middle of the pitch.

"(Y/N)! WE DID IT!" Alex called, she looked up and saw the forward running at full speed at her and she opens her arms.

Alex crashed into (Y/N) as they giggle madly, embracing down on the grass.

"We did! I'm so proud of you!" (Y/N) exclaimed, hugging Alex even tighter. She looked up at (Y/N) with a smile and (Y/N)'s world seemed to stop.

"I'm proud of you too" Alex replied. They were lost in their own world until Kelley comes up to join their hug.

"Oh my God guys! Back-to-back!" Kelley said, sandwiching herself between the two players.

The trio laughed and started making confetti angels around them.

Soon, after all the awards had been given out, it was finally time to celebrate with their family in the stands.

(Y/N) tried to ignore the sting of seeing Alex celebrate with her husband. But what was she supposed to do?

She jogs on over to her mother and sister who flew out all the way to France just to watch their daughter.

She jumps up and envelopes them into a wild embrace.

"You did well kiddo!" Her mom said, ruffling her hair. She chuckled and grinned widely.

"I suppose you did okay" Her sister retorted. The siblings looked at each other and laughed.

"Thank you guys for being here" (Y/N) said, tears in her eyes again.

"Of course. Anything for you, honey. Now go celebrate with your teammates" (Y/N)'s mother said, shooing her daughter away.

(Y/N) laughs and proceeds to jog back to her squad. She tries looking for Alex but she was still with Servando.

Her shoulders slump for a bit and sighed.

Noticing her bestfriend being a little beat down, Tobin approached (Y/N) with Christen and her niece.

"Why do you look miserable and not like someone who hasn't won their second consecutive world cup?" Tobin said playfully, (Y/N) laughs dryly and tries to make baby talk to baby Heath.

Tobin and Christen both glance in Alex's direction and looked back at (Y/N) worriedly.

"Even after four years, (Y/N)?" Christen asked with a sad smile. (Y/N) stops playing with baby Heath and looks at the Utah star.

"Well... I guess I can't help it" (Y/N) said quietly. Tobin and Christen could only nod at their bestfriend.

*end of flashback*

The thought of Servando once again riled up (Y/N). Why the fuck would he leave Alex when obviously she's the best thing that could ever happen to anyone?

And Mia? Come on, she's only known the kid for a day and she already wants to see the kid grow up as a proud Aunt.

"Straight men..." (Y/N) grumbled to herself as she stood up and started to work on her usual schedule.

---

It had been about two days since (Y/N) saw Alex and Mia. She was going about paperwork about her next product for her athleisure line when her phone rings.

(Y/N) stares at the unknown number on the screen but figures it may be something important about her social work.

She pushes the answer button and steels herself for a phone conversation. Hey, she can't help it if answering phone calls still gives her anxiety at 40.

"Hello?" (Y/N) said. She hears a sigh of relief and a chuckle she knows all too well.

"Oh my god, I can't believe you still have the same number after all these years" Alex breathed out on the other end.

"Alex?" (Y/N) said, immediately breaking into a smile.

"Yeah. Hi" Alex said. (Y/N) stood up and started walking around her room, trying to control the giddiness she's starting to feel.

"Hey. To what do I owe the pleasure?" (Y/N) said. There was a slight pause from Alex.

"I actually.... have a really big favor to ask. I mean I was really going out on a limb trying to call you on a phone number you gave more than a decade ago" Alex said, chuckling at herself.

"Sure, shoot" (Y/N) said. A bit nervous on what Alex was about to ask her.

But she knew that whatever it was she'd inevitably do it. She was whipped like that.

"Mia's classes got suspended because of some weird cold epidemic happening in her school... She's off early and I'm still stuck in traffic..." Alex trailed off, feeling a bit shy at having to ask (Y/N) of all people.

"And you need me to pick her up because you're afraid to let her wait too long?" (Y/N) offered, already moving to get her keys and wallet.

"Yes... I hope you're not busy" Alex said, biting her finger nervously. She was sitting in an Uber she took from the university she was coaching at.

"I'm not. Anything for Mia" (Y/N) said heartily. Alex feels her chest warm at (Y/N)'s words.

She caught herself feeling giddy and mentally scolds herself. Why was she feeling this way now?

"Damn, that girl has known you for a day and she's already got you wrapped around her finger" Alex joked, ignoring the beating of her heart.

"What can I say? She's charming like her mom" (Y/N) said. Heading out the door and walking to her car.

"Sweet talker" Alex retorted. The forward was thankful (Y/N) couldn't see the blush on her face.

Why was she blushing? She thought.

"I try. Text me the school address and I'm on my way" (Y/N) said.

"Alright. Thanks, I owe you one" Alex said, putting the phone on speaker so she could start typing Mia's school address.

"Cook me dinner and we'll call it even" (Y/N) replied without thinking. She mentally face-palmed herself, did she push too far?

After all, they haven't seen each other in years. (Y/N) didn't really know if Alex still considered her as a close friend.

"Sure. How does next week sound?" Alex said, already feeling nervous about having (Y/N) over.

"I might just take you up on that offer" (Y/N) replied, heaving a sigh of relief that she didn't scare off Alex with her brashness.

A notification dinged on (Y/N)'s phone.

"Already sent the address, (Y/N). Thanks again!" Alex said, truly grateful that (Y/N) was willing to do this for her.

"No biggie. I'll text you when I'm with Mia already. Do I drive her to your place or mine?" (Y/N) said, getting into her car and starting the engine.

"Mine please. There's a spare key under the doormat. I'll meet you there as soon as I can" Alex said.

"Gotcha. See you later, Al" (Y/N) said, pulling out of her driveway.

"Mia already knows you'll be picking her up. Drive safe, please" Alex said.

"Yeah, mom" (Y/N) joked.

"Shut up. See you!" Alex said, before finally hanging up.

(Y/N) chuckled and put in Mia's school address into her GPS. She shoved her phone into her pocket and went on her way.

Mia's school was pretty near, about a 15-minute drive from her place. (Y/N) parked her car and started walking towards the school entrance.

She found Mia up and about, her bag abandoned on the ground as she kicked around a soccer ball with her friends.

"Hey hotshot. Time to get home" (Y/N) called to the girl. Mia whipped her head around and grinned at her newest Auntie.

"Auntie (Y/N)!" Mia said, breaking into a run and hugging the older woman.

"Hey kiddo. You seem to be enjoying that class suspension huh? Your mom's stuck in traffic so you've got me for company in the meantime" (Y/N) said, carrying the girl and spinning her around in a hug.

"(Y/N)? As in (Y/N) (L/N), soccer legend?" One of Mia's friends said, staring at (Y/N).

"Yeah! She's my newest Auntie!" Mia said proudly, walking back to her friends and picking up her bag.

(Y/N) felt a bit flattered that a seven-year-old would know her name. She walked towards the kids and heard them giggling.

"Auntie (Y/N), my friend says she wants your autograph and a photo. Would that be okay?" Mia said.

(Y/N) chuckled and squatted down to the kids' height.

"Sure thing. What do you want me to sign?" (Y/N) said. Mia's friend gingerly picked up the ball they were playing with and handed it to (Y/N).

"Could you write it to Leah, please?" The girl named Leah said to (Y/N).

"Alrighty then" (Y/N) said, scribbling her signature on the ball.

Mia also took the liberty of volunteering to take the photo of (Y/N) and Leah.

By the time Mia and (Y/N) we're walking away, Leah was absolutely ecstatic.

"So kiddo, do you wanna stop by for food before heading home?" (Y/N) said, slinging Mia's bag over her shoulder.

"McDonald's please!" Mia said with a skip in her step after the promise of food after school.

"Gotcha. But I'll check with your mom if it's alright first" (Y/N) said. She opened her car's passenger side door and allowed Mia to take her seat shotgun.

"Okie dokie artichokie" Mia said, exploring the inside of (Y/N)'s car from the confines of her seat.

(Y/N) chuckled at the young girl's antics before putting Mia's bag in the backseat.

(Y/N) dialed Alex's number and got into the driver's seat. She connected her phone to her car's bluetooth so both she and Mia can hear the conversation.

"Hello?" Alex answered, (Y/N) couldn't help the smile that graces her features.

"Hey Al, I got Mia already. She has something she wants to ask permission for" (Y/N) said, winking at the girl.

Mia giggles.

"Hi Momma!" Mia said, practically jumping up and down in her seat.

"Hey Mia. What did you want to ask?" Alex said. (Y/N) started to pull out from the school parking lot, already heading to the nearest McDonald's.

"Can me and Auntie (Y/N) buy food from McDonald's before going home?" Mia said pleadingly.

"Hmmmmm..." Alex hummed on the other end.

"Puh-lease mom" Mia said, practically begging her mother.

"Yeah, please Alex" (Y/N) said playfully. Mia grinned at her, pleased that she was getting the support of an adult.

"You two are insufferable. Fine. Buy me something while you're at it" Alex said, laughing.

Both Mia and (Y/N) cheered, the McDonald's was already in sight when they finished talking with Alex.

(Y/N) bought food for Mia and herself, including a vegan option for Alex (A/N: Yes, McDonlad's will have vegan options in the future lmao).

(Y/N) pulled up to the Morgan household not long after. Mia quickly sprinted out the car with her food in hand.

The older woman chuckled at the young girl's energy, taking Mia's bag from the backseat as well as her and Alex's food.

"Slow down, champ" (Y/N) said, walking up to the front door. Mia crouched down and fished the spare key under their doormat and opened the front door.

"You should tell your mom it's not exactly safe to leave a spare key where anybody can get it" (Y/N) said, heading inside.

Mia shrugged and rushed to the living room, turning the television on and munching on her food.

"Hey, don't you have homework?" (Y/N) called, setting down Mia's bag in one of the seats in the living room.

"Nope. We just finished exams so the teachers are pretty chill right now" Mia said, half distracted by the soccer game that was currently on television.

"Alright then. I'll just put your mom and I's food in the kitchen" (Y/N) said heading out of the living room.

"Okie dokie Auntie (Y/N)" Mia said.

---

It took Alex about another hour before finally getting home. She could hear Mia laughing on the other side of the front door.

She fishes out her keys and opens the door. The sight that meets her immediately makes her feel warm and fuzzy inside.

(Y/N) and Mia are playing soccer inside their living room. A make-shift goal has been made from throw pillows.

Mia has the ball and is currently trying to get past faux-goalkeeper (Y/N) who is hilariously using oven mitts as keeper gloves.

Her daughter looks very focused on the ball and doesn't seem to notice her yet.

Mia blasts the ball and (Y/N) subtly lets it slide on her right and fakes a defeated sigh.

The young girl jumps up in celebration and pretends to sip tea.

"Ah, even you're celebrations are top notch I see" (Y/N) said, chuckling at Mia.

"Of course. She learns from the best" Alex finally said. The two whipped their heads in her direction.

"Mom!" Mia said, running towards her mother and enveloping her in a hug.

(Y/N) stood up and brushed off any dust she might've been covered in after their mini-soccer game and approached Alex.

"Seems you've been pretty busy" Alex commented, looking pointedly at her oven mitt covered hands.

(Y/N) blushes and quickly removed them. She scratches the back of her neck and chuckles shyly.

"Well, we got pretty bored without you here" (Y/N) said, grinning cheekily. Alex shakes her head but laughs at the pair regardless.

"I'll clean up in the living room. Your food's in the kitchen, Al" (Y/N) said, moving to put away their pillow goal.

"Thanks, (Y/N)" Alex said. She leads Mia into the kitchen and eats with her daughter telling her about her day.

"My friends even took a picture with Auntie (Y/N)!" Mia said enthusiastically, as if on cue, (Y/N) walks in.

"You seem to be pretty popular with seven-year-olds, huh?" Alex said playfully. (Y/N) blushed once again.

"Yeah, well I try" (Y/N) said, taking a seat next to Mia. She fishes her own food and starts to eat.

Alex and (Y/N) ate in silence as Mia continued on talking about her day in school.

But the peace was interrupted when Alex's phone dinged. She turns to read the message, it was from Kelley.

She's here? We should hang out and catch up soon! Is she free on Friday?

"Who's that?" Mia said, peering at her mother's phone.

"Just your Auntie Kelley" Alex said, typing in a reply.

I'll ask her now.

"I miss Auntie Kelley!" Mia exclaimed, her french fries lying forgotten on the table.

"Kelley? How's she been doing?" (Y/N) said, piqued by the mention of an old friend.

"She's doing great. She's happily married now" Alex said. (Y/N) looks at her surprised.

"Wow. That's amazing. I'm happy for her" (Y/N) said. She felt a little bit guilty of having missed out on a lot of important events in her friends' lives.

She was a pretty bad friend.

"Yeah. She wants to catch up with you, by the way. I told her you were back... if that's okay. I mean she was the first person I called to pick Mia up but she was busy" Alex said, rambling, fearing that (Y/N) might not have wanted other people know she was back in town.

"That sounds great. I miss her and the other girls" (Y/N) said, reaching out to touch Alex on the shoulder.

The forward almost sinks into the touch that sends electricity through her.

"We could invite them all over for drinks on Friday, if that'll work out for you" Alex said, fighting back a shiver with (Y/N)'s hand still on her.

She almost whines at the loss of contact when (Y/N) pulls back.

"Sure. That'll be perfect. God I miss them all" (Y/N) said, already looking forward to Friday night.

But she looks down at Mia worriedly.

"But what about Mia? Who'll look after the kiddo while we're out with the girls?" (Y/N) said, ruffling the girl's hair.

Mia giggles and reaches up to hold (Y/N)'s hand as she gets back to eating her fries with the other.

"I have a baby sitter. Don't worry" Alex said, grinning at (Y/N).

(Y/N) stays for about an hour more before finally checking her watch.

"As much as I love being in the company of you two... I'm afraid I have to go. I have an online meeting in 45 minutes" (Y/N) said, standing up and looking apologetically at Alex and Mia.

"Aw, but Auntie (Y/N)" Mia started to say. Alex pats her daughter on the head.

"Shh, Mia. Auntie (Y/N) has to get back now. But you'll see her soon again" Alex said. (Y/N) blushes at the promise of more time together with them.

"Yeah. I'll be back before you know it. I'll stop by here on Friday so I can hang out with you a bit before your mom and I go out" (Y/N) promises and pinches Mia's cheek.

Mia moves away from (Y/N) but grinned at the older woman's offer.

"Okay, Auntie!" Mia said.

Alex walks (Y/N) out the door while ignoring the slight sting in her heart to see the woman leave.

"Thanks again for today. Look at Mia, she's only known you two days and she already loves you" Alex said, opening the front door for (Y/N).

"Oh I can assure you it's reciprocated" (Y/N) said, smiling at Alex.

They hold each other's gaze a bit longer than necessary. (Y/N) shifts on her feet for a bit before finally stepping out.

"I look forward to Friday, Al" (Y/N) said, tipping an imaginary hat in Alex's way.

Alex giggled and leaned on the doorway.

"Me too" She said. (Y/N) shoots her a smile before walking to her car and pulling out of the Morgans' driveway.

Alex watches (Y/N) drive away, with the latter giving her a small wave before speeding.

She returns the wave before closing the door. She leans back and puts her hand on her heart, feeling the thump of her heartbeat.

She looks at Mia in the kitchen who was distracted with trying to use the McDonald's paper bag for origami.

Alex sighs before pulling out her phone and dialling Kelley's number.

"Kell, I think I have a tiny bit of a crush" Alex said.

To Be Continued

#alex morgan #uswnt #alex morgan imagines #uswnt imagines #fluff #singlemom!alex #gay shit

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codyfernmorelikedaddyfern · 5 years

Text

Romeo & Juliet - Duncan x fem!reader

Apparently, I can’t write about anyone else by Duncan Shepherd but I’m not even mad about it.

It is inspired by Romeo & Juliet by Dire Straits.

Description: When Duncan bumps into (Y/N), the young woman he madly fell in love with and dated throughout high school and university, he desperately try to fill in the blanks and reconnect with this woman from his past.

Warnings: Mention of smut and past relationships, domestic abuse, cliffhanger.

Word count: 7349.

Duncan dropped his empty paper cup in the bin on his way out from the coffee shop, his coat closely tucking him in his own body warmth in the gentle sway of the snow falling to the floor. The gentle puffs of vapour escaping his mouth reminded him how much he loved the cold weather and in his absent minded trance of watching the snowflakes dance their way to the ground, his confident steps were stopped as he bumped into the shorter frame of a woman, her nose stuck on her phone, scrolling through what looks like to be Twitter or Tumblr.

“Terribly sorry about that!” he managed to mumble at the sight of the young woman dropping her phone to the ground. They both reached for the device that bounced on the frozen ground, watching the shatters the fall had caused to the screen.

It’s only a few seconds after that his face read the features plastered on the visage of the girl in front of him. “Duncan?” her voice whispered, unbothered by the state of her phone. His eyebrows knitted in confusion. “Y/N? Oh god, it’s been a hot minute” he tried scoffing off the awkwardness from his shoulders. His blue gaze fell on the shattered screen “I’m really sorry about that, could I… Make it up to you?” he attempted, trying to push the tremor in his voice.

It was like their heart had remained dormant for all of these years apart and finally, the sight of each other’s slightly aged features kick-started the pumping of their blood to their faces. Her hair were devoid of coloured dye from their teenage years and back to their (Y/H/C) roots and a few wrinkles marked her forehead. He, however, did not change his hair, instead deciding on letting his facial hair grow to a well-kept stubble, the gap between his eyebrows now marked with the years as well.

Damn he had no idea how much he had missed her until she was now standing in front of him. And the years that had gone by since he had last seen her had only made his heart swell some more like it used to. “It’s fine, Duncan, I’ll just get it fixed” he had even missed the way her voice sounded. The young man nodded, reminiscing on the past he had shared with the young woman and trying to find his footing once more. “Let me at least take you for a coffee at some point?” Duncan attempted.

“Just, you know, to catch up?” the young man pushed further, raising his eyebrows in hope. A large puff escaped (Y/N)’s lips and she lightly screwed her beanie back on her head. “I’m in a bit of a hurry right now” her eyes darted out of his gaze, only to find a focal point in the near vicinity. “Not right now” she sighed before starting to push past him “maybe next time” her voice rang again as he watched her run away from him.

Duncan didn’t know how long it took but somewhat he ended up waiting in front of the cafe nearly every day, always at the same time. Until one day, he woke up earlier and made his way to the shop before he would usually show up and he saw (Y/N), nursing a cup of coffee while typing away at her laptop. Unwrapped from her heavy coat, scarf and beanie, he was silently reminded that the years had definitely gone by. It was like he was 17 and falling in love all over again.

When (Y/N) looked up from her laptop, her gaze fell into Duncan’s who offered her a small wave. It took him a couple of seconds to ponder his next moves while she returned the gesture, the indecisive throbbing of her heart making it near impossible for her to look at anything but the tall frame of the one she loved so dearly. The young man made his way to the table next to hers, taking the spot on the wooden chair. The young girl hoped he would just keep his nose in his drink, she hoped he would just leave her to her own device but he obviously thought otherwise, greeting het with a careful “good morning”.

“Good morning, Duncan” her voice whispered back as he sat down next to her. “How are you?” Duncan replied with a genuine smile, peeling off his own coat. “I’m alright, how are you?” she tried her hardest to smile but something in her stomach turned. It had been years but the lingering feeling was still here.

First loves as well as fist mistakes. She promised him he would always be special but right now, she couldn’t help but remind herself they were over for a reason. She reminded herself that, despite the 5 years it took for them to bump into one another, she should not fall in love all over again. But (Y/N) couldn’t help but melt at the soft honey like tones of his voice or the heavenly shades of blue dripping from his gaze. Small talk lead to slight giggles and reminiscing of the happier memories they had shared.

From new jobs to new life experiences, the 20 minutes they had spent talking flashed within seconds. She had settled for a small office position down the road from her apartment, she had moved after important events came and thrashed her life around and he drank her words, eager to learn more and more about the last few years of her life she had spent away from him. “If you’re ever tired of working there, I’m sure I can find a position for you” Duncan even offered.

They were not as young as they used to be, but the maturity that had bloomed through the years made them more calmed and composed. Adults. 27 years old adults. Duncan couldn’t help his heart from fluttering at every laugh his remarks would pull from the woman sitting next to him. How silly he had been to let her go the way he did.

“I see you got your phone fixed” his smile was bright, as if no time had passed, as if they had never been apart. “Yeah, thank you for offering, though, I appreciate it” her voice replied. Duncan fished for a pen in his coat pocket and went to scribble on a napkin. “Here, that’s my phone number, I think I changed it since the last time we talked” he handed her the piece of tissue. (Y/N)’s cheeks ignited again with pools of pinks and reds as she grabbed onto it, unsure on what to do. “I would very much like to take you on a date, could go to that Chinese you loved?” his eyes reached hers, hopeful to rekindle some sort of link with the young girl he fell in love with so many years ago and for who his heart seemed to still beat for.

But her gaze left his to look at the scribble once more. “I don’t think that’s a good idea, Duncan” she breathed, her eyes falling on the door opening to a tall frame holding up a little boy. Her fingers stuffed the napkin in her pocket as Duncan looked in the direction of her gaze. His heart seemed to shatter while she watched her stand up, pressing a kiss to the cheek of the man and peeling the toddler out of his arms.

“Duncan, this is Sam, my partner, and this is Liam, my son” she sheepishly introduced her ex-lover to both of the figures. Sam’s hand reached forward to shake Duncan’s while she spoke again. “Sam, this is Duncan, we used to see each other a while back” (Y/N) blushed as she cradled the sleepy boy in her arms.

The sad blue gaze of Duncan’s fell into hers and he forced a smile to the three of them. Taking the last gulp of his drink, he excused himself to (Y/N) as he slipped his coat back on his shoulders, biting back the venom of jealousy coursing through his veins. “It was great to catch up, have a lovely day” Duncan dropped as he waved at her before slipping away from her view.

When she looked up to her boyfriend, the anger burning in his eyes made her aware she would be in for a ‘treat’. Silently pleading for him to keep it in. Sitting back on her chair, she gently stroked the chubby cheeks of her little boy, still half asleep in his mother’s arms. “Was it… His father?” his voice spoke in anger once more. (Y/N)’s eyebrows furrowed in annoyance and she bit on her bottom lip. “Why would it matter?” her voice spat as she gently stroked her son’s hair.

“Does he know?” Sam continued, crossing his arms around his chest and leaning back on his chair. Her eyes rolled at his comment and he smacked his hand on the table, making both (Y/N) and Liam jolt up. “I asked you a question, (Y/N)” his voice dripped once more, cutting old wounds open. “Do you think I’m that much of an idiot? I know who he is” Sam’s face pushed further across the table, anger exuding from his pores.

“He is Duncan fucking Shepherd. If anything, the child support he can provide would help you get out of that shithole you call you home”. His words cut through her like she was made of clay and he spoke daggers. “So I’m going to ask you one more time. Does he know?!” The young woman stood up after sitting her son on the chair, wrapping herself in her coat and tucking her (Y/H/C) locks under her beanie before pulling the child back in her arms.

“And I asked you ‘why does it matter’ if he is the father or not?” she spat right back at him, her face inches from him. “I’m done with your shit, Sam. If I wanted to be under surveillance 24/7, I would have dated a cop, not a banker” she finished, dangling her scarf around a neck before making her way out of the coffee shop and leaving him to sear in his own anger and jealousy.

Her feet carried her through the busy streets of DC as she held her little boy in her arms, letting him distract her from the harsh conversation that had transpired and what more was to come. His candid speech had the mother even forget about the interaction as she dropped the little boy to day-care and quickly made her way to work.

It’s only when she made it back home with her toddler and her fingers grazed against the napkin Duncan had scribbled his phone number on that she was reminded of the events of the morning. Looking at the digits penned on the tissue, she pondered on just throwing it in the bin. But the look he had given her before he left was convincing her otherwise. She had to, at least, apologies.

Well, she didn’t have to. She wanted to. So she did, keying in the number she read on the napkin, she typed in the shortest apology she couldn’t muster.

(Y/N): Hi Duncan, I would like to apologies for this morning. I would be happy to have a proper chat over a cup of coffee if the offer still stands. Best of luck, (Y/N).

Sent. Receipt. Read. Her heart stopped and she quickly locked her phone and placed it on the kitchen counter before joining her little boy on the couch. As Duncan tried his hardest to find the words to refuse. She had a whole new life now and his selfish desire to try and pick up the pieces he had broken half a decade ago. But he had so many questions burning his lips and begging to escape his lungs.

Sitting on the chair of his office, he played with his phone, twirling in between his fingers as he tried to formulate an answer to her text. The buzzing of her phone pulled her nose out of the colouring book she was working on filling in with Liam. (Y/N) rose to her feet and gingerly grasped her phone, turning it to see a text from Sam. It was his turn to apologies and without even asking for her piece of mind, he had texted her that he was on his way. Her eyes rolled and her heart stopped when another notification came through.

Duncan: Hi (Y/N)! No worries, it was bold of me to assume you would be free J. Would you rather make it a breakfast or a dinner?

(Y/N): Either sounds good to me, should we see how things are on Friday?

Duncan: Sure thing! I’ll check on you then. Great to speak to you again.

He was trying his hardest to hold back. He couldn’t be the needy teenager he was when she met him. A decade had passed since then and he could not allow his need take the better of him. Duncan was a man, not a boy anymore. However, she brought it back to him. The giddiness and the eager need to keep on texting her. It’s like they were back in high school, when they first met. Before the ever growing love that spurted from them. Before life got the best of them.

A sigh rumbled through her chest while she made her way back to her boy, her phone half-hazardly tossed on the couch while she praised Liam for his beautiful selection of colours he had picked for his butterfly. (Y/N) only left the company of her little boy to start cooking dinner. Looking through the half empty cupboards, she swore under her breath.

A knocking pulled her attention to the door. Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion before she remembered the text Sam had sent her. (Y/N) went to open the door, the frame of the man standing there with a small bouquet of flowers. He made his way in the small apartment, his body language still exuding anger and discomfort.

As Liam heard the door, he quickly ran to hide against his mother, earning a small giggle from the young woman. But her smile dropped when Sam threw something else on the counter. “What is that?” she curiously looked at the large white box sitting on her kitchen counter.

“A paternity test for your new friend” Sam grinned at his girlfriend while she pulled Liam in her arms. “What do you mean?” her voice answered, laced with confusion and some tones of fear when her eyes dropped to his. “Buddy, how about you go and play in your room? Mom and I need to talk a little bit, okay?” the man went to stroke the cheek of the child who nodded, escaping from his mother’s clammy hands and scampering to his bedroom.

“Is Duncan Shepherd the father of your fucking son?!” his voice has hoarse and dry, a hint of alcohol making (Y/N)’s nostrils flare. She squinted her eyes, turning her face to the side as if she could avoid the smell of booze on his tongue. “I don’t want to talk about this, Sam” she whispered, stepping back from him, weary of what was to come. “Because I’m right, isn’t it?”

A few seconds went by with silence, only interrupted by the sharp blow Sam had just delivered across his girlfriend’s cheek. She didn’t budge though. She opened her eyes, tears welling and threatening to spill as the stinging handprint on her face turned into a throbbing pain. That is definitely going to bruise as he allowed himself to smack the spot once more at the lack of an answer.

“You are a coward. Hitting a woman” she spat at him while her tears streamed down her face. A third slap. The last one. “Sam. I need you to leave my house right now” she breathed between her tears as the ache did nothing but throb. The sudden realisation seemed to hit him. “I told you I was done with your shit. Get whatever leftover of decency and clarity of mind you have and leave” her voice trembled. His eyes were wide in shock as he tried to plead for her to forget him. But the only thing she did was to call the police as he cried.

The only way she got him to leave was manacled by the police officer escorting him out of (Y/N)’s apartment. “Ma’am, if you would like to press charges, I will need you to come to the station with me”. Her mind was pleading for her to follow him but all she could think about was the soft cries of her son in her arms. “I can’t leave my son alone, do I have to do it right now?” she asked and the officer shook his head.

“Come to the station when you are ready, but I would advise you to have someone over to discuss it. Domestic violence is very hard to go through and it might be best for you to not do it alone”. (Y/N) simply nodded while she swayed the little boy around. With a bang, the door was closed and the only thing left in the apartment was his little tired cries. The officer’s words rang in her head once more and she pulled her from the counter, considering the choices she had to avoid being alone. The gentle wails of her boy stopped before she could properly think.

(Y/N): Hey, I know this is last minute but could we make it a dinner? Tonight?

Duncan: Sure! Do you want me to cover it? I’ll meet you at wherever! J

A tinge of regret bit her gut when she texted him back with her address. But there was no ounce in her action as she just curled with her boy on the couch, the exhaustion having taken him to sleep. Another knock pulled her to her feet and she found herself checking her reflection. The impact had left a small bruise right on her cheekbone and she tried to hide it by fanning out her hair. When she opened the door, the large smile of Duncan quickly faded at the sight of the dried tears and the not well hidden bruise.

“Are you alright?” he asked, concern dripping off of his tongue. All (Y/N) could do was nod and mention for him to come in. “I had an eventful evening to say the least” she glanced at the clock while closing her apartment door behind Duncan. “And it’s not even 8pm yet” she scoffed before inviting him in the living room. He watched her gently lean over the couch, covering her little boy’s face with tender kisses to wake him up.

His confused state brought some sort of qualm to her mother as he snaked his little arms around her neck, returning her kisses to her in a few blabbers. “Buddy, do you remember Duncan from this morning?” she softly whispered as he nestled close to her. His little head nodded and his tired face left the comfort of (Y/N)’s neck to look at the man. “Do you want to say hello to him?” she pepper his temple with kisses, gentle rocking him in her arms.

He whispered a little hello while rubbing his sleepy eyes before yawning and snuggling closer to his mother who quickly praised his politeness. “Sorry, Duncan, I guess this is a bit much to wrap your head around” (Y/N) chuckled. He reassured her, he surely wasn’t expecting his high school sweetheart to be a mother now but he wasn’t surprised about it either.

“Do you want to help mommy cook?” she looked at the little man who eagerly nodded before climbing down from his mother before scampering to his bedroom. “What happened?” Duncan attempted as he took a step closer to his hostess. “Sam got a little handsy and… Jealous, I guess” she rolled her eyes. “He convinces himself that any man around me is Liam’s father” she whispered, placing her cold hand on the swollen lump on her cheek.

Duncan seemed to freeze, her gaze averting his as much as she could but it pulled her right back in. “Your boy’s not his?” the young man wondered, slowly following his ex-lover to the kitchen where she started to pull together what could make a dinner. “No, to be fair, he barely was a boyfriend” she chuckled a bit, trying to relieve some of the growing tension caused by the conversation.

His blue gaze fell into the empty cupboards. “He didn’t particularly like the fact that I didn’t want to tell him who is” she carried on gently, “It’s not a conversation I enjoy having so I usually don’t answer when he asks”. Duncan seemed to piece together some dots. The worry stirred in Duncan’s stomach. “Did he ask if I was?” he finally asked after swallowing the growing lump in his throat.

(Y/N) nodded, pulling a large pot and filling it with water before pushing it on the stove. Duncan walked closer after a couple of minutes of silence fell between the two of them. “He even bought a paternity test to prove it” she scoffed again.

This was wrong, Duncan thought. He shouldn’t wrap his arms around her waist like he did. He shouldn’t rest his head on her shoulder. It didn’t matter if he had been hopelessly in love with her for nearly half of his life. “Am I?” he whispered as he felt her melt into his embrace. She really shouldn’t let her heart flutter the way it was when his breath fanned against her skin.

Her hands went to rest on his arms as if she was giving him a queue to hold her tighter against his chest. “Would you like to be?” she gingerly breathed once the thrumming of her heart got louder. “Why have you never told me?” Duncan pulled out of the embrace and for a second, he thought he might tear up. “Because I never needed to” she span on her heels, a comforting smile on features as she looked up to him.

“So… I’m the father?” his words fell out of his mouth, more as a statement than a question, with a rumble and she went to look at the floor. “No, Duncan, you’re not. Liam has just turned 3” she looked up at him. A heavy sigh left his chest but he wasn’t sure if it was in relief or disappointment. After releasing her own sigh and brushing her (Y/H/C) off of her face, she made eye contact. “His father was… a mistake” she admitted with a whisper.

“I never had the balls to tell him and he fell off the radar anyways.” Her arms crossed across her chest. “Are you… Doing okay?” he wondered as he looked around at the small apartment reminiscing of the empty cupboards. “The offer still stands from this morning, my mom would be happy to have you in the team” Duncan continued.

The rustling of feet came to the kitchen, bringing a happy smile across (Y/N)’s face. Skittish and shy, Liam quickly ran to his mother and asked if he could play in the living room instead of helping, his little heart filling up with happiness when the young woman gave him a nod. “I’m really sorry this happened” Duncan said when the sound of cartoons on TV rang from the living room. “Please let me order dinner, it’s not much but it’s some help, right?”

The slow sound of her whimpers snapped his attention to her and he quickly rushed to pull her in another embrace. His lips hastily found her forehead, covering it with tender kisses while she let herself cry in Duncan’s arms. “I should have never let you go on your own, I should have jumped in the car and followed you. It should be me fathering your children. It should be me filling your pantry with food and providing for the both of you” he whispered in her hair, her hold on him tightening as she clutched on his shoulder for dear life.

“If only you knew how much regret I felt the day we ended it” he breathed in the shell of her ear. Her hand left her grip on his back to reward him with weak little punches against his chest. But his grip on her never loosened.

“I had so much to give you, Duncan. I was so in love with you” she nestled her face in his neck, wetting the collar of his shirt with salty tears. “I still am” he gently whispered, dropping a soft kiss to her temple. “I promised you thick and thin, it was just such an awful timing and I am so very sorry” his voice trembled in his throat as her quiet sobs calmed down with his soothing embrace.

“You still love me?” (Y/N) quietly whimpered, pulling her face out of it’s perch to drown in the ocean blue of his eyes. The sight of her tearful eyes rid him from his speech, all he could do was nod. “I love you like the stars above” he breathed, losing himself in her eyes. “I’ll love you ‘till I die” he carried on before she gingerly pushed her lips against his, a gentle sigh escaping the both of them at the simple touch they had missed and craved for so long.

“Would you give us another chance?” Duncan’s lips quivered as he pulled from her lips and she nodded eagerly before joining their mouths again in a passionate kiss, his hands resting carefully on the small of her back while hers found purchase on his neck.

“Mommy?” pulled them away from one another, Duncan quickly turning away to hide his blushing cheeks. Tears welled up in the little boy’s eyes as he ran to his mother who quickly pulled him up in her arms. “Is your friend going to be mean to you too?” he softly whimpered against (Y/N), trying to give Duncan the meanest pair of eyes he could muster. “No buddy, we’ve been friends for a very, very long time, my friend isn’t mean” she shushed his tears by softly rocking him, her eyes catching the expression plastered on Duncan’s face.

“To prove I’m not mean, I’m going to let you chose whatever we eat tonight, how does that sound, little one?” he leaned closer to the little boy. Liam’s sad eyes turned mischievous in half of a heartbeat, looking back at his mother. “Really?” he asked her and after she gave another look to Duncan, she nodded. “Anything you’d like, honey” she kissed his chubby cheek, turned off the fire under the pot of water and went to crash on the couch with her boy in her arms and her man at her hips.

Hesitantly, Duncan perched his arm around (Y/N)’s shoulders, pulling her closer while little Liam snuggled closer to his mom. “So, what do you want to eat?” the man asked before watching the toddler stand tall, excitedly throwing his arms up and chanting “chicken nuggets” at the top of his lungs.

His mother looked fondly at him, not able to hold back a laugh before going straight under his tee-shirt to blow heavy raspberries on his tummy, having the boy crumble in heavy laughers against his mother. Fishing for his phone, Duncan quickly scrolled through his apps to find Postmates, quickly working through his own order before passing it over to the woman by his side. When she looked at it, she noticed he had already entered her usual “go-to” menu.

“You expected me to forget your McDonald’s order?” he chuckled while she picked Liam’s Happy Meal before giving him his phone back, a light blush on her cheeks. Her son’s face suddenly twisted and she didn’t even need a word to understand what went through his mind. “Potty?” she raised an eyebrow to him as a confirmation and he nodded before sliding off of her laps. “Do you need me to come?” she asked again as he shook his head, running for the bathroom.

They both could hear the scrapping of his stepping stool on the floor and a gentle chuckle shook (Y/N). “Does it hurt?” Duncan enquired as he looked at the angry shades of purples on her cheekbones. “No, not anymore” she went to poke it a couple of times. “You should put some ice on it” he replies as he stood up. “I’ll bring you some from the freezer” the young man said once more before navigating to the kitchen.

A heavy sigh left (Y/N) and for a moment, she enjoyed the silence surrounding her. It only lasted a few seconds before Liam’s voice rang from the bathroom. “Mooooooom! Heeeeelp!” the little boy whimpered and the young woman quickly rose to her feet to reach the bathroom door. “Can I come in?” she gently asked, pushing the door ajar. The little boy hummed as he tried reaching for the handle of the toilet. “Can’t flush” Liam whimpered as before watching his mother’s hand press on the handle for him. “Let’s go wash your hands now, you dirty boy” she teased, lifting her son up in the air as he giggled to the sink.

Following the gentle laughs, Duncan made his way to gentle laugh of (Y/N)’s boy while holding a flannel holding a few shards of ice. “Here” his voice softly whispered as he lowered the cold pack to her cheek. His hand landed on the small of her back while she watched him through the reflection of the mirror in front of them.

Liam broke the tension as he shouted a happy “Done!” by shaking his wet hands before being placed to the ground by (Y/N). Her body twisted gently, her hand resting on top of Duncan’s as he held the ice on her cheek and then, her eyes met his. Then his lips went to rest against hers with a gentle sigh, grazing the edge of her jaw with his knuckles.

But the tender gesture was interrupted by a loud knocking. Panic quickly pumped in (Y/N)’s veins. Her fearful eyes met Duncan’s once more before he went and fished for his phone. “Must be PostMate. I’ll get it” he pressed a protective kiss on her forehead before making his way to the front door to meet whoever was delivering their dinner.

The smell of fried food quickly filled the space and Liam jumped on the couch, chanting his praise for the fast food carried by Duncan. The young man chuckled at the little boy’s enthusiasm as (Y/N) joined the two men and helped unpack the content of the paper bags. The air filled with the gentle conversation Duncan started with Liam, taking an interest about the boy’s day care program.

Fondly looking at the pair, (Y/N) could not help but feel her heart swell. She, too, had never been able to dampen the quickening of her heart when she so much thought about the Shepherd’s son. She was just about 16 years old when she found herself falling for him. He had the typical bad boy demeanour and when he would take her out in his car to a shady alleyway to get high, she knew he was trouble. Even when after getting arrested and narrowly escaping juve, she couldn’t help but get drawn to Duncan.

While she watched them start to bond, she realised how much she had missed him and how much she loved watching his interaction with the toddler. She wished he had been the one to father the boy. She wished they had never been apart.

Duncan held the body of his girlfriend closer, the pad of his thumb ran across her cheek, wiping away tears that had spilled as while he made love to her. His heart sank in his chest as he watched (Y/N) burry her face in the crook of his neck. His grasp tightened and he finally spoke. “Why were you crying?” he peppered gentle kisses to her temple, another sigh shaking her frame as she held a sob.

“It might be the last time we see each other” she breathed out, her tears staining his skin once more. “I just love you so much, Duncan” (Y/N) propped herself against his chest to crash her quivering lips against her boyfriend’s. “And I love you just as much, babe” his voice trembled as the kiss broke off. “Someway, somehow, once you finish your degree, I’ll be here and I’ll woo you off of your feet and we’ll run away from DC” he reassured her tears away.

Duncan knew he meant every single words that rolled off of his tongue. The only thing he needed was his girl and he would do anything for her. Even if it meant to let her go so she could bloom and focus on her studies far from him. (Y/N) stirred out of consciousness, falling asleep in the arms of the one she was so desperately in love. She hoped she wouldn’t wake up because it would mean that, in the morning, she would have to jump in her car and drive away from him.

But she did wake up and the pair of arms holding onto her were a cruel reminder of what was about to happen. Slinking out of his sleeping grasp, she reluctantly snuck in his kitchen, cooking what was their last breakfast together possibly forever. The feeling of the warmth of his arms clutched at her heart. But there was just silence between the both of them. They ate in silence, held each other in silence, and got dressed in silence.

One last look at the clock made the nightmare a reality and with a sigh, (Y/N) sheepishly told Duncan she had to be on her way now. The young man nodded sadly, holding her heavy suitcase on their way down to their car. It was just silence until he loaded her belongings into the trunk of her car. She stood by the driver door of her car, tears flowing again on her face.

Duncan gingerly cupped her cheeks, tilting her head to kiss her once more as he held her tightly, holding back a sob of his own. “So, that’s it?” he whispered, his eyes looking far in the horizon of DC as he quickly blinked his tears away. He felt (Y/N) nod against his chest before their embrace was cut short.

She climbed in her car, lowering her window for him to prop himself on it, stealing a last handful of kisses, each more and more desperate as he felt his heart breaking. “We can do this” he whispered before crashing his lips against hers once last time. “I’ll never stop being in love with you, I swear it on my life” Duncan sobbed in front of her.

He rarely showed his emotions in public, afraid it would give his surrounding the idea that he was weak but, when he was with (Y/N), his façade melted away. She looked at him in the eyes one more time as she turned on the ignition of her car. “Seatbelt on. And call me when you get there, we can make it work” Duncan said, grazing her jaw with his knuckles. She nodded before finally speaking, “Don’t wait for me, Duncan” she whimpered before closing her window as her heart shattered.

The young man watching his lover drive away, convinced that the distance wouldn’t get between them, convinced that his family wouldn’t get between them, convinced that nothing could take away what they had. But when his mother’s reaction to his heartbreak was a cold “At least now, you don’t have anything holding you back anymore. No more dead weight”, he could only realise how wrong he was to believe this could have worked.

“(Y/N)?” His voice whispered, pulling her out of her daydream. When she shook her head, she realised why his voice was so low, the upper half of her son sprawled across Duncan’s laps, a gentle snore escaping his tired body. She bit back a laugh when she watched the man’s uncomfortable position. “You can move, he’s not a cat” she chuckled before reaching back for the boy.

“I’m going to put him to bed” her voice made Duncan nod, slowly lifting the sleeping child in her arm, carefully cradling him. “Can I come with?” he whispered, smiling softly at the vision in front of him. After watching the young woman nod, he jumped to his feet and followed her as she walked to the boy’s bedroom.

He went to lean against the frame of the door, fondly looking at (Y/N) as she laid her son in his bed, quickly changing him into his pyjamas before tucking him between the folds of his dinosaur print blanket. As she bent over to drop a handful of kisses on Liam’s face, her eyes met Duncan’s adoring gaze, a wave of crimson staining her cheeks.

Her feet carried her to him and they made their way back in the living room. Her frame dropped on the couch, releasing a sigh of relief before she started to gather all of the garbage on the table, silently helped by Duncan. He sat next to her, looking at the woman she became. “I’m sorry I never called” she broke the silence, trying to dismiss the tight knot in her throat. “I’m sorry I never tried to reach out for you” she closed her eyes as if it would prevent the tears threatening to spill from breaking free. “I’m sorry I was always too busy and never tried hard enough to make us work”.

His arms linked around her and he pulled her close to his chest as she kept of pushing apologies past her lips, sobs shaking her body. Duncan ran his hands through her (Y/H/C) locks while drawing soothing circles on her back as she grew silent. “I’m sorry I never visited” he softly whispered, his hand landing on her cheek to caress her skin softly. “I guess I convinced myself that, if it was meant to be, we would end up together no matter what” he stroked her hair once more, his gaze looking for her teary one.

“Look” Duncan caught her eyes in his, “I have never been able to be with anyone else than you and I don’t think I ever will be able to” he shifted on the couch to sit up. “I think you’re the love of my life and if we were the right people at the wrong time, so be it. But I’m here right now and I have not been this happy since you left” her lips caught his in a soft kiss after he spoke. His words resonated with him, she had never been able to get over her passionate love for him no matter how hard she tried. (Y/N) unsuccessfully dated a few men and even a woman at one point, but no matter how much she liked them, no one could quench the ache that her heat suffered from her separation with Duncan.

“Let’s take this chance. Build off of what we left. I want you to be The One” his voice was desperate as he pulled her on his laps, his face now lost against the gentle skin of her neck. “We could be a family” he whispered, his hands flat against her back while she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, allowing one of her hand to lose itself in the brown of his locks.

“What would people think?” her voice shook through her throat while she closed her eyes at the gentle contact of Duncan’s breath fanning out against her flesh. Goose bumps ignited her skin. “Fuck them” he said blankly before pecking her neck. “Life has given me another chance at being with you and I’m not wasting it” his lips pressed on her throat once more and (Y/N) sighed. “I had no idea exactly how much I missed you until I saw you” she admitted, giving his chocolate locks a gentle tug at the sensation. Their heartbeat synchronised in a heavy and fast harmony as if they had never been apart. “Are we really doing this?” she whispered right as Duncan laid her down on her couch, his kisses becoming hungrier and sloppier as he hummed against her skin.

As crimson flushed against her cheeks while his lips stained her collarbones with wet trails, she clutched his arms tightly, her eyes opening in shock. “No, we can’t, not right here” she whimpered as he propped himself up above her. Duncan captured his bottom lip at the alluring sight laying upon him. His eyes, dilated and darken with arousal, captured her figure before pushing himself off of her, clutching her hands to help her sit up. “Feel free to stay the night, though” she softly whispered while jumping up to her feet.

Duncan scratched the back of his neck while looking up to her. “You can crash on the couch or… We can carry this on to the bedroom?” the blush on her face seemed to spread further across her cheeks. The young man stood up, his body dangerously close to hers while his lips worked their way across her shoulder some more before playing with her own mouth, his tongue reaching to find it’s long lost mate. His finger slide underneath her thighs as he pulled her up against his chest.

The only thing breaking the fiery dance of their mouths consuming one another was the short whispers she released, directing their intertwined bodies to her bedroom. Duncan gingerly kicked the door shut, satisfied once it clicked into place, he then stepped further in until clumsily bumped on the frame of her bed, having them both tumble on the soft mattress with a few giggles.

It was like they were 17 again and exploring each other for the first time, learning how to love and worship the other’s body. A task they both mastered.

His lips explored the supple flesh of her neck with a soft array of sighs and quiet moans from his lover. A couple of tears prickled her eyes and silently glided against her cheeks and the heaving of her chest pulled Duncan’s out of his worship to look at her teary face. “Honey, why are you crying?” he whispered, shuffling to lay besides her instead of resting between her thighs. His hand reached up to wipe away the salty drops unfurling on her soft features, a concerned frown pinching his face together.

“I just… I’m so in love with you, Duncan” she whimpered as her hand reached to rest of the stubble of his jaw. “I want you forever and ever” her voice trembled so more and she bit down on her lip to stop it from quivering. “I’ve always said I was going to marry you one day” his face melted into a gentle smile as he pecked her lips. “And I’ve missed you so, so much” she finished in a breath as it fanned against his face, his eyes locked into hers.

His hips shifted to rest on hers once again and as his lips retrieved that sweet little spot he would suck on to drive her crazy, he released a raspy whisper to the shell of her ear. “Honey, remember that time we had to be extra quiet because my mom was sleeping across from us in that chalet in France?”. She eagerly nodded, her legs quivering while his tongue licked a wet and hot strip along she length of her ear. “Well, you’re going to have to make more of an effort to not wake up your son” he withdrew his face from it’s hiding spot against her neck and watched her bite her lips once more. Another nod rattled her face, this time more shy and reserved.

“Good. Because I’m about to make you feel how much I’ve missed you”

______________________________________________________________

Tagging the Killer Queen squad : @shenevertricks, @wroteclassicaly, @idespac, @psychobitchtess, @hplotrfan, @tea-party-at-wonderland, @langdxn, @hecohansen31 & @blakewaterxx

Just let me know if you would like to be tagged whenever I post a piece!

#duncan shepherd #duncan shepherd x reader #house of cards #hoc

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emdythewriter · 5 years

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Let me be your shield | chapter eight (elriel)

“What do you think of this one?” Elain turned around with a new dress in her hand to show her sisters, friends and bodyguard.

“Too flowy,” Mor, Feyre’s friend that had tagged along since the two were going out to shop and eat after leaving Elain’s, said.

“Do you have anything else?” Cerridwen asked from her spot on the bed. Everytime Elain looked at bed she blushed thinking about what she had done hours before.

“This is it,” Elain answered gesturing to all the dresses she had pulled from her closet and laid about the room for all six people to see.

“And we don’t have time to shop for anything else,” Nuala added for anyone that thought of asking the question.

“If he had stayed in town maybe we would’ve,” Nesta said obviously bitter at Lucien still. Elain wasn’t surprised considering her sister thought no one was ever good enough for her. It even took Rhys sometime to win over Nesta after he had met her.

“His job is unpredictable,” Elain said and normally she would’ve added a “sometimes” at the end but it was no longer accurate for them.

“Whatever let’s see the blue one again,” Nesta said gesturing to one she had said was alright when Elain had first pulled it out. She picked it up from where she had laid it and held it in front of her. The dress was a royal blue that was strapless and flowed out as it went down.

“That might be the best one,” Feyre said though her nose was scrunched up and told a different story.

“I’m going to look,” Azriel said getting up and no one stopped him as he headed for the walk in closet.

“Tell us about where he’s taking you again,” Mor said probably hoping that would add context and help them choose the closest dress for the occasion.

“It’s this old country club that olds events based around a single dance or decade. Tonight is simply just slow dancing.” Elain answered for what felt like the hundredth time at this point. She liked Mor but sometimes she found the blonde annoying.

“What about this?” Az asked causing all of the women to turn towards him. He was holding a black dress where the top was all lace, the sleeves hanging off the shoulders. The skirt was fluffed out and would land just above her knee when she put it on. It was a fifties style dress and something her mother had modernized for Elain when she was in high school. Lucky for her she hadn’t changed in size since then.

“That’s the dress mom re-did,” Feyre said looking at the dress Elain had completely forgotten existed.

“I forgot I still had it,” she said taking it into her hands and smiling at the memory of unwrapping it. Her mom had finished it just in time for a movie premiere that her nor her sisters ended up attending in the end. It had also been the night of the accident their mother had been killed in, so Elain had neglected the last gift she had gotten from the woman.

“It’s perfect Elain,” Cerridwen said her voice dreamy as she looked at the dress.

“You’ll look so beautiful in it,” Nuala added.

“You’ll be getting lucky tonight,” Mor smirked causing all the girls to laugh.

“I think I found you the perfect dress,” Azriel said with a smile. Elain smiled back as she took the dress from his hands and thanked him.

Everyone piled out of the room as Elain got ready, saying goodbye to them as they left as well. Azriel was the only one left when she started to get ready. The whole time she showered and dried her hair, did her make up and got dressed she had a bright smile on her face. She hadn’t smiled like this in almost a year. Part of it was the fact that she was finally getting her Lucien back, but most of it was that she would be dancing the night away in her mother’s dress.

___

She was pissed. Furious. Enraged. None of those adjectives did justice to describe how Elain currently felt sitting in Azriel’s SUV outside of the dance hall and listening to Lucien cancel their date.

“I’m sorry babe,” Lucien was saying but Elain was so mad she was barely letting him finish whatever the hell he wanted to say.

“You promised,” she seathed, phone tightly grasped in her hand Azriel almost thought she would break it.

“I know but this is a big break for us lainy, we’ve been trying to get these rights for months and now we have,” he was saying. Elain rolled her eyes hating how it was always something keeping them apart these days, keeping them from healing.

“I don’t care Lucien you already made a commitment to me,” she said.

“My commitment was to this job first and you know that.” He said the wrong thing. He had said the fucking wrong thing and Azriel knew it, Lucien knew it, everyone in the building knew it and soon the whole world would know it.

“Don’t bother coming home tonight,” Elain said with a calm Azriel hadn’t been expecting to hear. “Or for the next few days, and if you do I will kill you.” Then Elain hung up the phone and turned to face her friend. “Will you dance with me?”

“Of course,” He answered without hesitating. They both got out and he held his hand out to her, which she took as they headed for the club. There she found happy and madly in love couples dancing with stupid smiles on their faces and she was pissed all over again.

“Hey,” Azriel whispered in her ear, drawing her attention. “Ignore them and Lucien. We’re here to have fun.” With that had dragged her to the center of the floor. Placing her hands on him, one holding his and the other on his bicep, they started to dance.

“I really hate him,” Elain said as the song started to switch to a new one, a Taylor Swift ballad.

“Then why are you still with him?” Az asked her knowing they were talking about her horrible boyfriend.

“Because the world expects me to marry him,” she answered thinking back to everything that had led up to her romance with Lucien.

“Why’s that?”

“You know why.”

“I want to hear you say it,” Elain looked up at her bodyguard and saw the challenge in his eyes. He knew she needed to talk to someone about her past with Lucien, and he was the only one she felt she could. Yet at the same time she was terrified of his response.

“I chose him in the end,” Elain whispered, hating how weak she was sure she sounded. “When the dust settled I was holding his hand, I was kissing him not Graysen. I ruined one relationship for another.”

“You told me he had been jealous about you and Lucien being friends,” Azriel started, both of them still swaying to the song. “My guess is he gave me an ultimatum.”

“He did,” Elain answered. “I had no choice but to choose Lucien for the sake of my father. I couldn’t hurt his company.”

“Maybe you should’ve.”

“Why would you say that?”

“Because then you would be happy.” Elain thought about and knew Azriel was right. Her time with Graysen had been her happiest of moments, even compared to the good days with Lucien. Yet lately her adventures with Azriel had been something different. She was happy, but on another level than before. She was herself, but with someone else that didn’t make her fake anything. Graysen had asked her to only speak when spoken to at a charity ball once. Lucien had always asked for her to only be in the pictures at premieres, never in interviews. They were afraid she would be too much herself, but Az didn’t fear any of that.

“I’m happy with you.” And it was the truth. They smiled at each other as the song changed and Angel by Aerosmith came on. “I love this song,” Elain said as she gripped Azriel tighter, pulled herself closer and they began to dance.

They did their own though. They each twirled and swirled and moved around the center of the floor like they were the only ones out there. Eventually a little space had been carved out for them and everyone circled around to watch, but neither Elain nor Az noticed. They were both only looking at the other.

She laughed and smiled as he spun her. He chuckled and brightened up the room each time he brought her back to him. They were pressed to each other, every inch glued to the other and unrealistically happy. Elain felt lighter and so did Azriel, though he didn’t know why.

The music stopped and the clapping started. Both of them laughed as they bowed, breaths heavy and chest heaving but their night had turned for the better. Having danced their fill Azriel led Elain out of the dance hall and to his SUV.

She was still smiling as she climbed into the passenger seat, brushing her hair back and pulling it up. “I needed that,” she said as she turned to look at her bodyguard, her closest and most trustworthy friend.

“I’m glad I was able to lift your spirits,” Az replied as he started the vehicle up and drove out of the packed parking lot. “Now I’m hungry so how does burgers and fries sound?”

“Amazing,” Elain groaned practically drooling, a smile still present on her beautiful face.

“Good I know the best place.”

“Then take me to heaven,” Az chuckled as he turned down a back road and head for the fast food place that was open well into the late hours of the evening.

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