you know, having anxiety sucks and all but i honestly think the worst part of it is how fucking embarassing it is, like...the situations that trigger my anxiety are so fucking stupid

you guys I spent TWO WEEKS losing sleep over having to do a blood test because for some reason I was scared I wouldn't bring my health card (it is on my phone how would I forget!!) or something stupid like that and the front desk person at the lab would call me an idiot and then I wouldn't be able to do it and then my doctor would call me stupid for missing a blood test and then also somehow I would get diagnosed with leukemia and then die- I cannot do this anymore this is so fucking embarrassing

When I was a little girl, I thought I should've been a boy. I didn't fit in with the other girls I knew and I didn't fit in with what I was told a girl was supposed to be like. Eventually, when I was 10 or so, I started thinking that I was a girl because I had the body of a girl. And as such, the other things people told me were clearly unnecessary to be a girl - they were all made up BS. That line of thought helped me with accepting myself for a very long time. But back then, I only knew of mainstream feminism, and as it's narrative quickly began to change around gender, I found myself trying to reconcile that old thinking with this new one about identification. I didn't want to be hateful or anything. I knew after all, how bad it was to feel like you couldn't be yourself due to your gender. But that old lightbulb moment I had as a kid, it stuck with me. I'd talk to an enby friend who explained it to me like, "I am nonbinary because I like feminine and masculine things", and all I could think was, "that is the most misogynistic thing I have ever heard". I'd read trans people talk about how stereotypes were good, actually. I saw a kids book about how a tomboy girl was actually a boy. All of that, while they still claimed that gender roles were bad. It was like I was going crazy. When I found radical feminism, and they viewed things in that same way, it was freeing. I didn't feel like I was doublethinking no more. I want to destroy gender roles, destroy gender itself. That doesn't mean biological sex will vanish. But the rest, the other "made up bullshit", it must go. (also I used my own boots to make this picture. It's one of my favorites I have made so far)

MHA 412 leaks (rant)

Iam not a fan of the leaks I really am not because wtf is going on?!?!?!

1) THIS !!! THIS WAS ONE OF THE WORST THINGS TO COME OUT OF THE FLIPPING MANGA. What the actual hell like there is no izuku introspection and also I get the idea that's being displayed here but it was done horribly in my opinion. It also doesn't make sense on applying this ideology to shigaraki considering that he literally told shigaraki he could never forgive him because of what he did to Eraserhead.

Look not giving up on the idea of people being able to change could be a good thing and idea that could be explained through midoriyas character and making him a symbol of hope. However, that doesn't excuse the horrible stuff going on between bakugo and izukus dynamic. Izuku has clearly been shown having negative feelings towards bakugo (as he should) and we should of seen those negative feelings explored this to me feels like an utter BS of an excuse to be like no izuku is just naturally a living saint which IS ALSO UTTER BS. We have seen izuku get mad and fight like a lunatic a whole bunch and now Iam supposed to believe that izuku can never feel a bad or negative emotion towards anyone because of this?!?!!?!?! The bakugo redemption fails due to many things but the main thing is the lack of izukus thought. about it.

Here is the thing YOU CAN FEEL NEGATIVE EMOTIONS AND HATE SOMEONE BUT STILL HAVE HOPE THAT THEY CAN CHANGE AND BECOME A BETTER PERSON but horikoshi does this to make bakugo look better?!?!? Why?!?!

2) ALSO THIS?!?!?!!

Wdym izuku has to give up the thing that he had to gain so he can win?!?! How is he gonna win is horikoshi going to make this a vestiges fighting eachother type of bs whole izuku defends himself quirkless somehow ??!?!??!??! Also why is it that he is THE ONLY CHARACTER WHO IS GETTING CONCEQUENCES?!?! Like you have tokoyami and hawks who lost their quirks but gained it back because AFO died so why not ( NO CONCEQUENCES) and then you have bakugo who LITERALLY CAME BACK FROM THE DEAD (no concequences) the only real concequences there were are some injuries then and there but that's it nothing big for the major and fan loved characters happend they're all alive and fighting.

If the point was that izuku could of become a hero with no quirk then shouldn't if he just become a quirkless hero instead of suffering getting a Quirk more suffering more suffering losing a quirk and more suffering!?!?

3) Also don't even get me started on how dirty shigarakis character is being done this guy wants to destroy stuff for fun not because he believes that the only way to rebuild a society suitable for him and his friends is by destruction or another ideology no he is just a psycho who wants revenge against THE WRONG PERSON!!!!!

4) wasted potential. IZUKUS LACK OF INTROSPECTION AND POV MADE THIS HORRIBLE. like it could of been good but it fell off horribly due to the fact that he didn't have any development and he is just jumping to ideologies. I think this ideology suits him but in theory he hasn't developed enough for him to have it in the first place. Also the lack of pov also makes us DOWNPLAY HIS BATTLE Strategy AND THE THINGS HE IS DOING. LIKE YALL AREN'T DEEPING THAT HE CANT BREATHE THIS GUY MAY DIE OR GET SEVERE BRAIN DAMAGE BUT IS STILL FIGHTING LIKE A MADMAN and I don't see people talking about it all Iam seeing is "oh bakugo parallel hehe bs". Horikoshi then goes on to show us panels of izuku training and you can tell there isn't a lot because NO ACADEMIA ARC AND BAD PACING OF STORY. The idea of him destroying society's pain rug could of been cool but again not enough pov or introspection or anything

5) WHY IS STAR AND STRIPES HERE?!?!?!! Like did shigaraki steal her quirk because I forgot and if he did then why hasn't he killed izuku using her quirk that's so stupid. Horikoshi has told us and shown us that shigaraki wants death and destruction. He ruined shigaraki and is he now downplaying his intelligence or something or is this some plot hole because why is she here and why isn't her quirk being utilised also what happend to shigaraki using danger sense?!?!! Like I swear that stuff was active last chapter so what happend now can the vestiges just deny and not give him access or something but if that's the thing he can freely use ragdolls quirk.

ALSO SHIG AND IZUKU ARENT THAT WELL DEVELOPED AND ONLY HAVE PARALLELS THROWN AROUND WITH NO INTERACTIONS SO HOW IS THIS GONNA WORK

Hi, Chicken!

I have recently entered a dilemma. After diving headfirst into research about 'quantum mysticism' (and VERY quickly learning how BS it is), I'm left wondering if there's anything linking witchcraft and science together.

I ended up watching a ton of science videos from a reputable source, and it left me feeling... weird about magic/witchcraft as a whole.

I guess I'm just looking for validation that magic/witchcraft is real, whether or not science can explain it.

Thanks, friend! <3

Internalized Scientism is common.

The only things that are true can be measured (so the philosophy goes), and if you experience something that cannot be measured, well, you aren't crazy - it's just that your experiences are not yet able to be reduced to measurements; your mysticism cannot now be tacked up on a board and dried out as a scientific specimen, but one day - what a relief! - everything you've ever known or been will be reduced to binary, nothing but a mystery-free code copied down in some database; measured, true, complete. What a comforting feeling, apparently, for how ardently some love the thought.

It is not particularly any of our faults for being made to feel crazy, foolish, stupid, or whatever pejorative term, for believing in things that have meaning without having measurement.

At the intersection where you meet the rest of reality lives a dazzling mystery, dark and glittering like granite in a mossy stream, breathtaking and sometimes so sacred we fear to touch it.

What little cracks appear in things that are when a person learns to explore that mystery. There is hardly an easier way to keep people from exploring those bothersome depths than just convincing every last person that because some crude scientist cannot reach into the mystery of their soul and crack it apart with a measuring tape, those mysteries simply do not exist.

I will tell you why I started practicing witchcraft (apart from the goading spirit man) - I knew there had to be something more.

There had to be something more.

Why are you here, Anonymous, sniffing after the mossy stream? Can you tell that your feet are wet, even if you can't feel the water? Do you sense there is something glinting down there, tucked away in invisible cracks?

You are at work, you are at school, you are on your phone, at the store, at a party, and still: moss is growing over your toes. Lichen is growing on the box of cookies on the store shelf. A ghost stag is sad somewhere near the meat department. And if they are not there, is something in the back of your mind yelling, keening, weeping: why not? where did it go, it is supposed to be there, how do I find it?

What is witchcraft, my friend? It is different things to different people, but I will tell you something that it can be:

Witchcraft is a system of tools and frameworks to explore the desperate need for something more.

Do you have that need? Does something inside of you want to cry with joy if you dare admit to yourself there might be something more?

If so, witchcraft may be the framework you choose to explore those mysteries.

I cannot convince you that there is a mystery to be explored. I do not want to convince you of that. I am just telling you - you can explore it. We have the tools. Sometimes, some of these tools are called Witchcraft.

Do you know the problem with trying to see more clearly in the moonlight?

As soon as you bring the sun in, it isn't night any more.

In the rich darkness, you may never gain the clarity of sight and insight you already have under the sun.

But for some of us, that gentle night is a place we must go to; to see things in their ghostly, star-struck forms; to feel the world outside of its measurements; to experience our same universe, inside-out and upside down, merely by virtue of having the sun slip away, and thereby become complete within ourselves - because so many of us are already inside-out and upside down to begin with.

Explore the darkness if you would like to. All you've got to do is open the door and let the moonlight reveal what you may already know:

your toes are in a stream.

my guy i’m the anon again, PLEASE say more about the trans experience in relation to this divine feminine bs

I LOVE YOU. I'm gonna structure this post around a couple of examples because these days I struggle with making a post out of nothing.

A trans witch rants about the divine feminine

So first of all I saw a tiktok awhile ago about how “the feminine energy lives by the moon’s cycle, track your cycles with the moon’s to become more in tune with yourself” and that’s great but it's also based on y'know, only women having a uterus. The idea that menstruation is an inherently feminine thing only women experience has kept me from receiving medical care that I desperately needed years ago. I’m going to start walking with a cane soon because I likely have a serious untreated condition and I cannot emphasize this enough, trying to get medical care as a trans person is terrifying. This is because of the lack of information. This is because of the sex/gender binary and assumptions around it.

Someone else on social media was actually asking me about my experiences and opinions as a trans person (which you are all welcome to do btw) more recently and brought up the divine feminine. They explained they believe women are more based in the spiritual realm where men are more based in the physical realm and this makes men visual and logical. They asked how I think trans people fit into that, and if I feel I'm more visual/logical. I thought to myself, no I don't think we fit into it because all of that is made up. Besides all the inherent awful and honestly misogynistic aspects to what they said, it upset me. I hate the idea that men are logical and women are emotional. I'm emotional. I'm nurturing. Sometimes it makes me dysphoric, but I don't strive for what society wants or a cis ideal of manhood so I go on the way I am and like to be.

I'm upset with the concept of the divine feminine obviously because it can be misogynistic and of course because it can take people down the alt right pipeline, but I'm also upset because it reminds me most of the world doesn't and (without trying very very hard) can't view the world the way I do. It doesn't see the way the sex/gender binary is made up and the harm it does. It doesn't see transphobia and especially the more subtle ways it manifests. It doesn't know how ideas that are "common sense" and all around us hurt me and my community.

Cis people don't see any of this and it makes me sad and angry and the divine feminine just reminds me of that as well as my usual frustrations with people not critically thinking about the ideas they take in. These ideas feed on people because they sound good at a glance. There’s probably a version of all this that IS good and could even be useful to trans people, but I don’t know what it is. Every version makes assumptions that the gender binary/gender roles makes. Even the people insisting that the “real” divine masculine/feminine concepts aren’t so bad have spat some stuff I take a lot of issue with as a trans person. So I don’t know what this lovely, useful version would be. Maybe I’ll find it eventually. 

It was very nice to get this off my chest, thank you. That first big paragraph was actually part of something that's been sitting in my drafts. I didn't put the whole thing here, but I think I was able to share enough that I can delete it now. Thanks for that. Also! I suppose I’ll say it once more just cause, since I’ve opened that can of worms, you guys are more than welcome to ask me about being trans 💙💕🤍💕💙

Why Vesna’s “My sister’s crown” in no feminist anthem but a Trojan horse filled with pro-russian messaging

My thoughts as a Ukrainian with a poli-sci degree.

I was debating whether to write this post but as the discourse around this song grows, I want to give people from other countries some context on the messaging used in the song and why Ukrainians are grossed out by it.

While I was writing it this post grew a mind of its own and I even ended up adding pictures so I'll fold the post here in case you don't care and just want to scroll through quickly.

First of all, it’s worth mentioning that this song attracted so much attention from Ukrainians because they use UKRAINIAN LANGUAGE in the chorus. It’s an important detail seeing how one of the singers is russian. A lot of Ukrainians share the opinion that letting a russian woman sing in our language is a completely vile thing to do to our culture. I agree with it too. But the abuse of our culture doesn’t stop there.

See this shot? This is supposed to be Borsch, a traditional Ukrainian dish. It’s worth mentioning that russia tried to appropriate this dish and in 2022 we fought tooth and nail to have UNESCO protect it as part of Ukrainian heritage. But back to the shot. The letters around it are supposed to symbolize russian propaganda. Great start🙄

But it gets better, lads. They start “feeding the propaganda” to the girl that —judging by stylistic choices as well as matryoshka makeup—  is supposed to represent russian people.

Right, so they *checks notes* use Ukrainian cultural dish —that russians almost succeeded in stealing from us— to show… what exactly? “Poor russians🥺 uwu” getting brainwashed? Oh, then let me grab my handkerchief. This is so so sad I think I’m about to cry😶😶😶

I mean, just a thought but if they wanted to show how shitty russian government treats its people, they could’ve recreated the historically accurate moment when russian tzar Ivan the Terrible shoved his underling’s face into a boiling soup. What does Ukraine and our long-suffering dish has to do with all this bs???

Now let’s talk about that “Crown”, that is supposed to belong to the sister (aka Ukraine). To me, as a poli-sci major, this is so stupid I don’t even know whether to laugh or cry. From the words of the band themself, where they explain —quite poorly might I say— the meaning of their song, we learn that “Crown” symbolizes the sovereignty of the 13 Eastern-European countries. Sounds perfectly valid. Here's a few random countries that I can remember from the top of my head in no particular order that have crowns in their symbols:

Coat of arms of the Czech Republic, Coat of arms of Serbia, Flag of Poland and Flag of Croatia

I actually decided that I don't want to have russian flag and emblem in this post because I don't want to look at it every time I scroll through, but you can go google it if you want, they have not one but two crowns on their emblem actually.

So what am I leading up to with all this flag-talk, you might ask. Well, the kicker is that THIS ⬇️ is Ukrainian emblem:

Not a crown in sight as you can see. I guess as a nation that was constantly fighting against imperial colonisation we’re not very fond of those. Who could’ve guessed🤷‍♀️

But the aforementioned two points are pretty circumstantial and in the grand scheme of things are not particularly significant. I felt compelled to point them out first to give people from other countries a bit of insight into the music video's visual. You are free to disagree with me on those. The main problem that triggers the majority of Ukrainians is the use of the word "sister". Listen, I know you don’t want to read a lecture on the nuance of Slav politics and I don’t really want to write it, I know you know how to google. So here’s the gist:

One of the BIGGEST narratives that russia is pushing in its export propaganda (aside from their go-to claim that all ukrainians are nazis) is that Slavs are all a family. Talk about shitty relatives, eh? But basically, it’s a lingering thing from USSR where russia exploited a bunch of neighboring countries and called this shit a “Union” (while convincing the rest of the world that those countries entered that union willingly and not under threats —or as a result of— hostile invasions, but I digress). So the way russia frames it is that russia is this big brother that "takes care of other little siblings”. Even writing it down made me want to barf🤢🤢🤢. This narrative was specifically very actively weaponized against Ukraine before the 2022 invasion. Its goal is to infantilize Ukraine as if we're not a whole-ass independent country, but a little sibling that doesn't know how to wipe their own ass. And that we just need good ol’ russia to come and save us from our own stupidity. I hope I shed some light on why this word specifically triggers us so much and why I think that this song has 0 to do with solidarity and overall is complete populistic bs with a generous dash of russian propaganda.

I want to emphasize that I didn’t make this post to fight or argue with anyone  but to give people another perspective if you’re interested in it from my pov as a Ukrainian. If you have other takes on it, I’d love to read them in the comments. Just please be respectful or I won’t interact.

This is all I have to say for today. Love, love, peace, peace, my dudes.

AITA for throwing my creator’s other invention off a cliff and trying to beat him and his friends up all the time?

So I know that everyone’s going to immediately jump on me saying “You were both built by the same guy that makes you BROTHERS” but no absolutely not he’s NOT my brother I would never view him as that ever and I’m going to explain exactly why

My (12 M, physically 20) creator’s other invention “Zach” (70 M, physically 20) was built about 68 years before me when our inventor “Jonah” was in his thirties. Our inventor viewed Zach as his son and raised him like one, supposedly “loving him” and all that garbage.

When he was about 90, he supposedly “died” and erased all of Zach’s memories blah blah blah who cares

The point is that Jonah somehow didn’t actually die even though he thought he would and for some BS reasons got dragged out to a lighthouse way out in the ocean, where he built me.

Jonah built me to look as much like Zach as possible, called me Zach, and tried to make ME be exactly like him EVEN THOUGH I WASN’T. I was supposed to be just like him, and for the longest time, I idolized him for being so “perfect” because of the way our inventor talked about him.

After a VERY LONG TIME, Jonah eventually put me in the basement of the lighthouse and told me to stay there, and being the obedient kid I was, I did. And APPARENTLY while I was down there, ZACH CAME TO THE LIGHTHOUSE AND RESCUED JONAH, LEAVING ME BEHIND

I SPENT THE NEXT FIVE YEARS OF MY LIFE ALONE IN A LIGHTHOUSE WITH NO ONE THERE FOR ME AT ALL

After five years, though, some people broke in and saved me. I explained my life story to them, and they explained not only that Jonah ACTUALLY died now (thank ****), but a bunch of things about Zach and how he was their enemy

They helped me rebuild my rusted body and helped me get over my idolization of Zach, and then they even let me join their biking club where we were trying to bring back a guy who saved the club leader’s life and a bunch of other people’s, too!

They gave me a chance to prove that not only am I different person than Zach, but I’m BETTER than him. I’m more advanced, I’m higher quality, I’m cooler, smarter, more skilled, I’m more EVERYTHING than him!

He was an enemy of the club, and we ended up fighting a few times, and I eventually revealed that SURPRISE, I’M THE GUY YOU ABANDONED, YOU JERK

He acted like he had no idea who I was and tried to convince me to stop fighting him, but obviously I wasn’t going to fall for that. I said some cool snarky lines to get back at him a little- I even called myself his “brother” because I knew he would think of me as that and it would tug on his “goody-two shoes heartstrings” (like he’s ACTUALLY a good guy in any sense of the word)

Anyway the fight ended by me throwing him off a cliff and sneaking some spyware into his systems, just like the club leader told me to do (the last part, anyway. I’m the one who decided to throw him off a cliff because GOOD RIDDANCE)

But now all of the supposed “good guys” are apparently trying to convince me to “quit the evil biker gang” and join THEM, and it’s getting REALLY annoying, and like obviously I KNOW Zach can’t be a good guy, but with how victimized he and his friends are acting, I just need confirmation from people other than my friends that I’m doing the right thing fighting him. I KNOW I am, I just want to have other people confirm it.

So, AITA? (The answer is NTA btw)

🌟 Wish: A Disaster? The Worst Disney Movie EVER? Thoughts from a Magnifico Fan 🌟

After watching almost every YouTube review, I was finally able to watch Wish because they turned it on at my office. and do I think it's an absolutely horrible movie? Do I think Asha's the worst Disney heroine ever?

No and no.

Wish isn't a 'bad' movie and Asha isn't the worst Disney heroine ever. Both were just very badly handled.

I know this is a pro Magnifico blog but let me explain. Asha's not a bad character. She's actually very pretty and has a great VA. Her character 'development' was just like crayons scribbling all over paper.

She not only opens the movie happily providing commentary on Magnifico's system, but SINGS ABOUT IT, then demonizes THE SAME SYSTEM she celebrated just MINUTES BEFORE.

Fast forward to the interview. She and Magnifico share a beautiful, heartfelt talk about her father. It's short-lived and not followed up on. Magnifico confides in her about his wish, only for her to completely ignore him and be like 'ey, so like, grant my Saba's wish yo'.

Maui and Moana had a prettier friendship.

Then of course the whole 'hey, Magnifico, I just sang about your Wish system like FIVE MINUTES AGO but I hate you, you're a MEANIE'.

I'm pro Magnifico but you can hate him for all I care. I think you have to admit there's way more heart and substance in Bolt than there was in Wish. There's way more substance in WALL-E and the two main characters BARELY TALK 😭

Then there's Magnifico. I 100% agree with everyone that said his descent into evil happened so quickly, it was rushed and he felt like a completely different character. Amaya did very little to intervene on her husband's behalf. He pretty much went into a panic attack over Star's arrival and had absolutely NO ONE assure him everything was going to be a-okay.

Magnifico made several mentions as to how everything he did was to keep Rosas safe, and prevent the past from repeating itself. Asha even told him 'that's why I want to work with you' but then they fell out because ??? I don't know? PLOT?

The whole thing about Magnifico's spell being unbreakable was BS considering the entire Disney empire was built on the foundation of true love and friendship and blah blah blah.

The people of Rosas were perfectly content before Asha took down Magnifico's system. Her grandfather said so himself right before she sang 'This Wish'. Outside of Simon, there was zero indication of the people living in torment.

Gabo said something about Asha killing her family and I was like 'wut' 😭🤣

Valentino was just there. So was Amaya for the most part, especially in comparison to Disney heroines like Pocahontas, Rapunzel, Mulan, Elena of Avalor (from a tv show), etc

Asha at one point was like 'this is all my fault, I started this', which was correct, then later on said 'this is all Magnifico's fault'

Evil Magnifico got his magic powers but then just used them to poke people. Disney doesn't really do death often but if he was supposed to be like a classic Disney villain...I mean Gaston DID stab the Beast sooo...

Honestly, the two best characters were Magnifico and Dahlia.

Am I saying all of this because I'm a 'poor widdle Magnifico' simp? No. I'm 100% pro Magnifico but I'd have the same opinions even if I hated him. Or didn't care about him. You can fight me on any of this but

Wish isn't a bad movie. Asha's not a bad character.

Both were just badly handled.

Find the word tag

Thanks @oh-no-another-idea for the tag!

My words: change, grace, escape, mine

Your words: sweet, smart, alone, away

Tagging @thepeculiarbird @awritingcaitlin @theeccentricraven @loopyhoopywrites @badluck990 @mysticstarlightduck @stesierra @sparrow-orion-writes @aziz-reads @ashen-crest @amandacanwrite or anyone else

Keep reading for:

Short snip of meeting Liam

Ash just used those telepathic probes she's not supposed to be using!!!!!

Slightly longer scene with Maddie and Kelsey featuring angst!! And me attempting sci-fi bs

Part of a grilled cheese debate scene that admittedly goes on for a very long time and I'll probably have to cut it down but it's so funny I'll be sad...

Change - from The Secret Portal Part One (Gwen POV)

“Oh, I forgot to introduce myself,” said Liam before I could ask what wamps were, though I assumed that red currency. “I’m Liam Beaumont.”

“Nice to meet you,” I said, then paused. “Wait, I was told you were the first recruited. How old are you?”

“You were told about me?”

“I gave a quick list of everyone,” Gabriel explained.

“Oh. Well, I’m eighteen.” My mouth dropped unintentionally. Liam sighed, playing with the zipper on his light brown jacket but seeming to find it humorous. “I know, I look eleven. But, like, I’m five-seven and people still think that. It’s not like I’m super short like Tyler.”

Tyler gave Liam a rude gesture.

“So…” I said, looking for a subject change, “your power is turning into diamonds?”

“Sort of,” said Liam. “It’s shape-shifting. Level-3, which is turning into different materials.” He held out his hand. His skin morphed from flesh to wood, a sleek metal, stone, then back to flesh.

I gasped in awe. “That’s amazing.”

Grace - from The Secret Portal Part One (Ash POV)

I sat there for about twenty minutes, breathing slowly as I felt myself return to reality. I wiped sweat off my forehead. My heart slowed. Once I felt like I could stand, I did. It was easy to navigate despite the dark—everything seemed brighter. My head still spun. I entered the kitchen, rummaging through the cabinet, and pulled out a glass. I filled it with water from the fridge, guzzling it down. I almost spit it out. As soon as the water graced my lips, a sudden flash of blue light swirled before me. Shaking it off as an effect of the probes, I refilled the glass to the brim. The blue lights happened again. During the third refill, my eyes rested on the time, a small light on the fridge. It was six am. There was no way I used the probes before even two. And there was no way that vision took more than five minutes. “Shit!” I hissed as my shock caused the water to spill over the glass. I guzzled the water again before grabbing a towel to clean up my mess. Once I did, I stood back up, tossed the towel on the counter, and looked at the clock again. I sighed. I wasn't sure what I was going to do in the remaining time that I had before everyone else awoke. I went back into the living room and sat on the couch. I lay back down, crawling under the covers, and tried closing my eyes again.

Escape - from The Secret Portal Part Two (Maddie POV)

Kelsey ran her hands through her hair. “I dunno, Maddie. It’s just that my powers? I don’t— I don’t understand them; no one does! And I—” She pressed her hands in her lap. “Ever since my… explosion, at the other base… I’ve been struggling.” She wrung her hands together anxiously. “And… my family? We’re living with my cousins, right?” “Yeah,” I said, leaning forward, hugging the post of my bed. My tongue ran over my braces as I listened. Kelsey exhaled. “It doesn’t make sense that no one in my family knows what Alii are. I… I guess it could’ve been earlier down the line. And my cousins, they… they viewed me like I was cool for a bit but then I showed them my powers. Accidentally. It was during a family argument, you know how those things go.” “Yeah,” I said. “And… I broke a lot of glass.” “Whaddaya mean by ‘a lot’?” I asked. “Just the glasses we were drinking out of during dinner,” Kelsey said, her eyes becoming fixated on her hands. “Deanna got some glass stuck in her hand.” “Oh,” I whispered. “She’s okay, now,” Kelsey said. “But that didn’t matter.” “Did that weird oxygen thing happen?” I asked. Kelsey shook her head. “I think that only happened because I thought I was in danger.” “Did they figure out why you did the oxygen thing?” Kelsey exhaled. “It has something to do with spontaneous combustion, I think.” She squeezed her eyes shut, pressing her hands to her head. “I dunno, something about, uh, raising the temperature of an object to its ignition temperature, I think?” “Ignition temperature?” I asked, leaning forward out of curiousity. “Yeah, when something catches fire without a source,” Kelsey explained. “The heat builds, and it can’t escape. There’s a steady flow of oxygen, then boom!” “So… you can also create a steady flow of oxygen?” I asked. “Yes. No-no— I-I dunno, Maddie, I can barely understand my powers as is with the science-babble the doctors are rattling off.” I looked down at my bare feet. “I’m sorry.” Kelsey shrugged. “It’s fine, I’ll… figure it out on my own.” I pushed myself off the bed and crossed the room toward her. “You don’t have to,” I said. Kelsey looked up at me. “Thanks.” Kelsey leaned forward in the chair, buried her head in my chest, taking off her glasses as she did. I hesitated before hugging her back. After a moment, she pulled away. “Thanks,” she said, about to put her glasses on. “Those are filthy,” I informed. Kelsey scoffed and reached under her hoodie to pull out a section of her shirt underneath, beginning to clean the lenses. “Fine, Mom,” she said in jest.

Mine - from The Secret Portal Part One (Ash POV)

“Ash! Come here right now it’s urgent!” “What is it?” I asked, crossing the room. “What’s the proper way to eat a grilled cheese sandwich?” Robbie asked intensely. I stopped in front of the couch. Everyone eagerly leaned forward in anticipation. “Um, American cheese, tomatoes, cut diagonally.” “Boom!” said Robbie. “I was right.” “Just because Ash agrees with you doesn’t make either of you right,” said Akash. “Besides, you clearly cut horizontally.” “You’re insane,” said Robbie. “Horizontally-cut bread is a valid way to cut bread,” said Gwen, pressing her palms together. “It doesn’t taste right though!” Robbie protested. “How does it taste different?” Akash protested back. “Texture,” said Maddie. “It does taste different,” Lexi confirmed. Robbie gestured at the sisters. “See? They get me.” “I’m all for texture,” Sam said, standing and walking to a more open space. “Which is why I put no tomatoes in mine.” “Tomatoes give it texture,” I pointed out. “But I don’t like the texture,” Sam said, making a face.

*sighs* Today I will be ranting about William Sh*t Paws, y es I know his real name is William Short Paws- but I refuse, I REFUSE to call him by his real name. Now, allow me to explain why I hate this old needy hag so he can finally get called out for his BS.

This man has always got on my nerves, especially when he treats Geronimo so badly. Allow me to bring the proof to court right here and NOW.

The Giant Diamond Robbery:

In "The Giant Diamond Robbery"..William Shit Paws goes out of his way and completely DESTROYS GERONIMO'S FRONT DOOR WITH A F*CKING ROLLER COMPACTOR. I was surprised when Grandfather William didn't even take charge for it, because I am pretty sure that the fact that this is considered vandalism. Vandalism is a crime that can get you charged or even worst ARRESTED, he didn't even bother to say sorry or even ACKNOWLEDGE on what he did was mabye STUPID OR WRONG!?. Also, in this book, he is so god damn humiliating and demanding in this book and also making Geronimo look bad in the public eye.

Mouse House Hunter

In "Mouse House Hunter", William Shit Paws turns to the most Shittiest person to ever walk in this son of a green planet. Because here, when Geronimo was about to lose the Rodents Gazzete, William Shitty Paws had the audacity to emoitionally manipulate Geronimo into doing something he didn't want him to do! he had also done this in "A Cheese-Colored Camper",

Family, are people who are supposed to be considerate on how you feel. They are supposed to understand your feelings, not control and use them to get what they want. Geronimo even said " I am a rodent, not a robot I have feelings to!" ironically, this is how his family and friends treat him. ( Something that I like to discuss soon as well.) And if you REALLY want to know how bad William Shitty Paws treats Geronimo? well:

He treated him so badly to the point that he wanted to fucking kill him.

Overall, I really wish William Shitty Paws can realize his actions and own up to them wait actually- ( that might be impossible). William Shitty Paws has I am pretty sure done a lot more than this, and I am honestly really surprised that he hasn't strangle him yet. The amount shitty things that he has done would put ANYONE on edge.

PLEASE READ !

hey guys! I know I've been ia for most of the year til now but it has been brought to my attention that an anon is spreading false accusations about me.

around a month ago or so, a rude anon sent me an ask. they were screaming in my inbox calling me names and telling me to delete 20 days before heaven.

(I blocked them but tumblr bugged and these 2 asks stayed in my notifs however they are not in my ask box anymore. i can't show u the whole ask for obv reasons. obv reason being that I blocked it as I didn't think they would come stalking me a month later)

as you all know, I've been under fire because of immature and unreasonable anons before so I've made it a point to block any anon ask that seemed like hate speech— regardless of what they're saying. I didn't answer them because they were being rude and I believe that I have already addressed this matter MONTHS ago.

this comment is an example. posted aug 6, 2022 a few days or a week after 20 days before heaven was posted.

i thought it ended there, however, just a few days ago while i was on vacation, i recieved a tumblr dm from the kflixnet admins. turns out, they have sent asks to the kflixnet admins telling them to reach out to me, tell me to delete the fic and/or kick me out of the network. good thing that kflixnet admins sent me a dm first so we were able to resolve the situation. I'm not sure what they did next to the ask (if they ignored it, answered it, etc)

though they've said that they want to address this matter privately— stated in their message towards the kflixnet admins, they have been sending immature asks towards my moots. though it is censored, it is clearly me they are talking about based off of the amount of letters and the k at the end.

once again, I'm thankful because none of my moots (as far as I know) believe this bs and didn't even bother answering

officially, I want to reiterate that I do not know about honor in the rains story. I have never had a wattpad account back then aside from a few months ago when genie (end-hypen) recommended me a jungwon fic on wattpad and read it, however besides that, I have not used wattpad at all and I did not plagiarise honor in the rain's in 27 days.

i gave the story a quick read and did notice similarities, however, besides death giving mc the chance to revive someone— which in itself is a common plot in regards to time traveling stories, my story stems out from that.

I hope you realize that not everyone lives the same life you do. people can not have a wattpad account and can be unaware of what you're saying so don't come screaming rude bullshit in my dms claiming that I plagiarised something and expect me to respond to you. note, I'm not saying I didn't hear abt wattpad back then, all I'm saying is that I've never dl-ed it (had to explain because God forbid you ppl twist my words again and start assuming)

though I've read the story, I'm not sorry to say but I will not be putting an "inspired by" or "based off of" in my notes because that would be lying, nor am I going to delete this fic because honestly, what the fuck is wrong with you people. deleting a fic isn't the answer to anything.

examples are; (1) in that story, the fem lead and male lead didn't know eo initially and tbh, she had absolutely no reason to save him and go through all that trouble for someone she didnt even no aside for the reason that she can save a life, while mine already had mutual pining.

(2) they (in 24 days) actually went through 24 days with eo while trying to convince him that killing himself isn't the answer. mine was more about the butterfly effect and how a simple kindness/concern shown towards others can make a huge impact on how their lives steer. heeseung was supposed to confess to reader but got stopped due to bullying and his life spiraled downwards. the bullying mixed with his personal problems were what drove him to initially take his life on his birthday.

(3) there's no monster trying to harm them— though they thought that there was.

(4) heeseung doesn't work at some cafe run by his parents, (5) he's not emo, (6) and he's certainly in love with the fem lead from the get go. if you read the story then you would've known.

please leave me and my moots the fuck alone. you make tumblr a worse platform than twitter.

sorry for the notif but I'll be tagging some of my moots to help spread the issue and to also let them know what's happening in the case that someone also sent them an ask in regards to this situation

@end-hyphen @forjongseong @bruh-changbin @chiyuv @1800-jaeyun @enha-cafe @enha-doodles @donghoonie-3 @evermorehoon @heetro @jayked @mimikittysblog @palajae @rikismiel @svnoohe4rts

ik it's prolly been a hot while since I've talked to u guys and I'm sorry that this had to be one of the first things u see by me in a long while 🙏

Do you think the Aryan Invasion Theory is true? I watching Mahabharata (star plus) and they kept using Aryavarta which reminded me of the Aryan race that Hilter used and so I did a little research and obviously he had no idea what he was talking about but what I found on the theory was a bit unsettling. I always believed that Hinduism/Sanskrit/Vedas originated in India (Indus Valley) but this theory seems to have genetic research to support it and it set off my whole belief system and gave me an identity crisis for some reason

Well, I am not really big on this theory because it has zilch proof to it as far as I have seen, only theories.

A simplified take on the same is the Indian Express article on Rakhigarhi excavation.

Other than that, there was this lengthy India Today article on the same excavation that gave me a headache because it won’t go to the fucking point, but I suppose it is in favour of the theory? I don’t know man, it’s fucking long and I did not read it all, just understood that IVC people from 4500 were native and that apparently we have outsider DNA.

There is no proof of any migration other than those based on change in genetic make up, a more plausible theory of which I explain later.

The interesting thing is, that the said Aryan invasion Theory first pinned us to be central asians from 1500BC and now we are Iranian farmers. It completely ignores the fact that Indians have little genes in common with Europeans who we supposedly come from moreso with South Indians (and I mean much more, we have almost the same gene combination except a few), and seems as if the India today article, based on the same premise of “Aryans had this one gene (r1 to be more specific) common with Iranians that Indus people did not have” fails to realise that people from the northwest of Indian subcontinent can have common genes with the bordering land for other reasons aswell because no shit sherlock, people fuck💀

I mean, how else do you explain the much higher genetic connection to south indians?

Another factor they use for the theory is the simultaneous developement of modern day Hinduism and Zorastrianism, but that too can be chalked upto influence rather than migration, given that Hinduism is actually older by a little margin (oldest living religion) and for the theory to be true, the migration should have gone westward instead.

Heck, the influence thing can easily exclude the theory altogther, because Iran is close to what are now the areas of IVC, and them slowly influencing the culture during or after IVC when they became more civil, (in 4000BC) or us doing the same, or even intermixing of the two will make more sense than AIT.

The migration of these Aryans cannot be proven otherwise aswell because there lies no proof for same. Literally none. The archeologist in the India today article and few others uphold it yet are unable to prove it beyond circumstantial evidence that makes more sense when turned against the theory rather than its favour, like the Iranian thing I mentioned. It might also very well be a migration to eastwards in Hind from the western part, because the Vedas were written before the supposed “Vedic Aryan invaders” happened and they are clearly neither Monotheistic nor Tribal, and align more with the Indic religions, so I digress they came from Central Asia or Iran.

Plus, the Vedas were written by the "aryans" on banks of saraswati, and the saraswati dried up centuries before they "destroyed IVC and took over". Another interesting thing is that Saraswati flew through the IVC sooooo.... yeah, maybe it all can be summed up to people fucking🫠

The thing is, we are locals, this culture was very much developed here on this land. Vedas, Sanskrit, Sanatan, there is a reason you do not see traces of them elsewhere, and I am certain this theory is BS because of the little I have read, because it has nothing to prove for itself.

But other than that, this particular subject was never of my interest because of how lengthy it was, and I fucking sucked at history, so may I suggest asking others who do think of this topic as often. I only know @tiananmen-square-orgy to be my nerdy mutual on this topic, and if finnie cannot help you I'll try geting you connected to a friend who is not on tumblr yet can help becuase of his extensive knowledge.

I HAVE A SPIDER VERSE THEORY 🌝☝🏻

Ok it’s more of a observation but it can be a theory too (spoilers of the second movie will be mentioned so watch out!)

Anyway this whole canon event thing is still wierd to me, however something that I don’t see being mentioned so much is the possible death of Miles’ dad,

And listen I don’t think it will happen, but here’s the thing I don’t think it won’t happen cuz of the canon bs I think it won’t happen because it’s not the actual canon event to begin with. Legit think the writers want to trick us here 😭😭

Here’s why…

In the first movie even tho we see Uncle Aaron as the one to inspire miles we cannot forget Jeff does the same thing, he was the one that gave the biggest speach that inspired Miles.

But here’s the thing you know who I think will die tho…. His mom. She got a lot of attention in the secound film, and she gave a big speach to Miles, she was the one to inspire Miles to make him never forget who he is, and I think the writers want us to belive Jeff is the one dying so they can surprise us 🤡🤡🤡 NAH I AINT BUYING IT WRITERS

You know who else wasn’t getting a lot of attention until they did and also inspired the main character to never forget who he is even tho people are against him and died …..

YEAH 🤡🤡🤡🤡

I wouldn’t even be surprised if in Beyond the spider verse she says that line and we know what’s coming 💀

I could be overthinking it and maybe she doesn’t die and maybe Jeff does or maybe even all of them stay alive….. but you know that gut feeling you can’t explain but you just know something is about to go down???

Yeah THATS WHAT I GOT WHEN I WAS WATCHING SPIDER VERSE 2, his mom was getting too much attention and I looked over to my bestie and said “I don’t like how she’s getting a lot of attention” cuz we know what that means 💀💀💀

I was even surprised that when Miguel said his father is the one dying specially cuz of the captain title, cuz that’s what happens to spidey people involved Captains apparently, no cuz I legit thought he was going to say his mom, but we gotta remember Miles wasn’t supposed to be spider man and yet he is, so the same logic could be applied here. Captains die and yet they didn’t….

Anyway I just think we should keep for a look out even tho I might be overthinking 😭

YOU WRITERS THINK YOU CAN ESCAPE ME I AM A OVERTHINKER I THINK EVERYTHING 🤡🤡IM WATCHING YOU WRITERS….

Anyway hope my queen doesn’t die she’s the best mom 😩😩

The best way for me to explain it is that on social media I tolerate socializing (ironic innit?). I don’t hate it. I don’t hate the people I do socialize with on here either. It’s just not on my “top 5 must do” list. So when y’all make the interaction unpleasant, on top of that, how the hell am I supposed to react? 😂 if I don’t like people in my business, or over explaining myself, or tolerating anyone’s bs whyyyy would I take that on here? Cus it’s an app? Yeah okay.

ZOIDS YOU SAY?

I don’t know what to ask, I just like hearing someone say zoids. XD; hmmm…

Here’s one: how are zoids (the pilot-able ones) made/born in your universe?

Do you know if there’s a cannon way they’re made beyond just “zoids Eve done it”?

When you get your lore, do you get it mostly from the show, battle story, manga, or somewhere else? What are your thoughts on how the anime/battle story/etc varies? (Like, do you get frustrated (I do… ;_; no matter what, I’m always wrong, it makes me sad) or do you consider them like … alternate universes from each other, or what?)

I might think of more later… I just wanna hear you talk about zoids. :3

:D I actually did a post about that first one already - this here! Canon - well, to mix in with your later question, canon varies. With the sole exception of CC/GF/NC0 all being part of the same canon, I think (and objective evidence points to) every other thing is its own, separate canon. Except maybe Wild Zero. As far as Zoid Eve goes I think Zoidians actually have a fundamental misunderstanding of it and that Fiona was wrong, but she so fervently believed what she believed, Van & co believed it. If that makes sense. The toy/Battle Story(?) background materials (many of which can be found on The Iron Bible) have small mentions of how wild Zoids reproduce, and how folks "tamed"/brought them into modern use. But those background materials don't mesh well/at all with the other canons. Unhelpfully, most other canons don't seem keen to explain these basics. Probably because it's supposed to be a kids' show/toyline and most explanations (especially ones that are logical outgrowths of what little canon does say) get dark FAST. CC/GF pretty clearly shares a lot of material with the Battle Story, so it's tempting to put them together. I think a lot of folks do? But BS has huge, fundamental swaths of incompatibility with the anime, so... I personally don't blend them (though I did consider adding Wolff into my canon for a while. But, no.) The manga is off in its own weird world. I love the art, but I do not vibe with its particular story and setting. I think it has an explanation about where Zoids come from but I honestly don't know it well enough to recite it because Zeke being a magic anime girl just doesn't work for me My hc lore is anime-centric, so I prioritize making the anime internally consistent. I use the toy/Battle Story lore where it works and just make shit up everywhere else. I'd say my hc lore is 50% extrapolation from the anime(s), 10% Other Zoids Canon and 40% Shit I Made Up. My thoughts on the wild incompatibility of the various canons...? Ehhh, we have a meme on the Zoids Discord:

...which is kind of how I view it, it needn't be frustrating. Of course, if you want to combine all the various shows together? I can see how it'd be frustrating. I don't do that, I don't see any way to make it function, but more power to the folks who want to do that. I would like to Talk About Zoids more, but when I get to working on the things that take time (commissions, fic, comics, etc) it makes me quiet on here. I don't want people to think I am not around! Just I can't necessarily blather about what I'm thinking about because it'd be spoilers. :v

ok tng update time. yesterday i did "haven" and just now i finished "the big goodbye."

haven: not like GOOD but definitely watchable! i think this was one largely saved from going in my garbage heap pile because nurse chapel played deanna's mom. like, if it hadn't been nurse chapel she would have been the MOST irritating annoying character but instead i was just like awww its majel barrett look at her being all quirky good for her. being ever so slightly faceblind it took me a minute to recognize her, since i just recognized her by her voice. it was also this episode or maybe the next one that i realized she was doing the computer - she uses such a different tone in tng and i hadn't been expecting to hear her voice, but the computer was starting to sound awfully familiar so i looked it up and wow sure enough. GOOD for her.

also, deanna having a truly horrible, wretched, AWFUL mother also endeared me to her more than words can say. i was JUST thinking that even though people say data is the knockoff spock it's not true - data is the inverse of spock, and DEANNA is the knockoff. like this was very much like oh she's half alien half human, it's time for her weird little alien marriage like amok time, it's time to meet her alien family like in journey of babel, etc etc, this episode could have been an email and she could have been a vulcan, etc etc etc. then she stormed out of the room and knocked that little gong thing over and i think i fell in love with her on the spot. im not sure if i wanna marry her or be her but i am now a deanna enjoyer.

my main gripes with the episode were 1. they never really explained how her intended husband and that blonde chick met...am i really supposed to believe lwaxana's bs about the current of life connecting them? and then also him saying goodbye to his parents was like...anyway bye mom and dad! not remotely believable. i didn't really care about him but it was wack.

and 2. deanna and will had an argument but then never got to reconcile at the end...this is the first time i was actually interested in their romance and then they barely got to speak two words to each other. i know tng episodes are 5min shorter than tos episodes, but this is like the 4th time i've thought they needed a bit more time at the end for that debrief scene they always had in tos...can they truly not pace this better. come on

the big goodbye: unwatchable in EVERY way. this episode was so fucking bad. dr crusher trying to make herself look Hot Like Women Do and getting mad when picard invited People Who Were Not Her to the holodeck. the data being from south america joke that is only a little better than kirk calling spock chinese in the city on the edge of forever. the fake stakes. picard walking around with lipstick on his mouth. treating data like a third wheel which should be punishable by law. the 1940s setting which is TIRED when you're not in the depths of whatever i was doing in 2014. COME ON

i will say though that i did love picard trying to learn the little insect language where the letters change their sound depending on what symbols are beside them. me trying to learn japanese on duolingo fr. also i did laugh one time when dr crusher swallowed the gum. her actress really sold that one. great job.

also, what was UP with the characters in the holodeck having their own existential crisis about not being real??? that plus any potential malfunction making the holodeck capable of killing people leads me to believe it should not be on this ship. like if i thought the fake holodeck characters were sentient enough to wonder if they were sentient and doomed to cease existing once i took my eyes off of them i would firstly never enter the holodeck again but secondly call a priest to disassemble it

anyway, tonight we are doing "datalore." can't wait for more data lore and also to meet his evil twin or whatever that's about