#gosh i guess the world really is just unpredictable | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

starlocked01 · 3 years

Text

The Black Coffee Widower

AO3 Link

Dukexiety Week Day 3- Coffee Shop

WC: 4.2K

Summary: Virgil works the late-night shift at the local coffee shop. That's where he poisons and picks up his victims. He wasn't ready for the one who didn't fight back.

Content Warnings (there's a lot today): Serial Killer/Coffee Shop AU Unsympathetic Virgil, Poisoning, Kidnapping, Swearing, Gun Violence, Negative Self-talk, Self Hatred, Murder and Attempted Murder, Implied Sexual content. Sexual innuendo, referenced rape, referenced mutilation, Strangulation, Hospitals, Police

@dukexietyweek

The simple fact was that they glowed. Virgil had long ago given up on trying to explain it to himself; they just glowed when he saw them. It was like a premonition- a beautiful soft light that needed to be contained lest it sullied the rest of the world by leaving it dim and grungy in comparison.

Virgil was grungy. He knew very well he didn't and would never glow as they did. Maybe that was the reason why. Maybe if he ever had to tell someone why he did it, he'd tell them that.

He killed them because they glowed and no one should be able to glow.

However, he'd never cared all that much about the whys. The hows were so much more fun. How did he pick his victims? Easy. They glowed and walked in at the wrong time. How did a weak, little, pathetic loser subdue the perfect glowing people? Bitter coffee was a perfect cover for bitter poisons. How did he end their lives? Any way he pleased.

How did he avoid detection? A healthy dose of anxiety kept him careful. Too many of the brightest glowing people escaped because they'd be missed. He never went by his legal name anywhere. He stayed patient and alert. He was the nobody that no one could ever remember. Playing barista sucked but it was the perfect cover. No one ever suspected the sulky, little, dimwitted worker stuck on the insomniacs shift at the quiet little 24-hour cafe. And no one ever really noticed if the store's hours were a bit unpredictable between 2 am and 4 am. That was the best time for hunting; it worked and Virgil wasn't going to stop anytime soon.

---

Virgil knelt, his latest catch already unconscious and tied up behind the counter when the doorbell chimed. Cursing at himself for forgetting to lock the door, Virgil grabbed a refill pack of napkins and stood cautiously. He gasped, finding the man who had entered shone twice as brightly as the woman he already had tied up. Certain that Miss Double-Soy-Latte-with-Hazelnut-Syrup-and-Whipped-Cream-you-got-that-Sugar? wasn't about to wake up and cause a scene, Virgil watched the man as he studied the menu.

The first thing he would do is take the man’s studded wrist gauntlet and fishnet fingerless gloves. Those things couldn't belong to someone who glows. Virgil squinted and could just make out a loosely looped studded belt to match, hanging off the man’s hip and exposing his lack of undergarments. Virgil hungrily followed the curve of that hip with his eyes up to the man's stomach peeking out underneath the ragged edge of a homemade cropped band t-shirt. He wanted to punch that stomach, to feel what it was like when the man tensed and when he stayed soft in compliance.

Next, he stared at shapely arms crossed in front of the man's chest. Those arms looked strong as a vice and he wondered how much effort it would take to break those delicate bones to render the muscles useless. Would he break first?

The man wore a sleeveless leather vest, displaying a museum's worth of inkwork, tentacles and snakes, and other writhing forms accented periodically with teeth and eyes and fangs and beaks. A rendition of the Harry Potter Death Eater mark set into the shoulder and tattooed thorns circled his neck. Virgil found himself getting hot under the collar and decided two in one night would be a fun challenge.

It was hard to see the man’s face until he flashed Virgil a brilliantly blinding smile as if on cue. The smile was all the sign Virgil needed to know this man would die tonight. He was practically begging Virgil to save him from the light radiating from his face. His gorgeous, handsome, wild-eyed face.

Virgil wanted so badly to touch the messy, overdue 5 o'clock shadow, to feel the scars left by razor nicks and frequent skin irritation. He wanted to wipe away the heavy eyeliner and mascara, run dirty fingers through greasy, dyed hair. He wanted those eyes to see him for who he is so he could spare them the pain of hoping there had been another ending once he'd entered the shop.

If the stranger was uncomfortable with his intense gaze, he certainly didn't show it as he approached the counter. Virgil squirmed as a cacophony of overlapping mismatched beats of a second hand overwhelmed his entire sense of hearing. Looking down, he quickly spotted a wristwatch on the unconscious woman's wrist and stepped on it to deaden the maddening sound. Soon all he could hear was the new customer's watch ticking erratically as though it needed to be wound up.

"Heya, kitten! Like what you see, baby?" the man smirked at Virgil as he leaned down on the counter and made sultry suggestive eyes at him.

"Excuse me?" Virgil hissed, recoiling from the familiarity.

"Woah, kitty's got claws huh?" the man giggled. Virgil stiffened, well aware how close the man could come to looking down and spotting the woman. And if he attempted to turn him in it wouldn't end pretty. He didn't want to have to clean up the shop after a struggle before having his fun.

"What are you ordering?" Virgil asked tersely.

"Me-ow. Guess you don't swing my way- darn. I bet you've got a totally bodacious booty too," the man batted his eyelashes at Virgil.

"That isn't on the menu. Order or get lost, yeah?" Virgil growled, trying to seem as disinterested in the enticing man as he could manage.

"Right. Seven shots of espresso, a shot of creamer, and a shot of the pineapple ginger concentrate, s'il vous plait," the man listed off as though he'd ordered the same thing a hundred times.

Virgil froze, unsure how to ring up the disgusting concoction, "what the hell? What kind of drink is that?"

"It's like me. One of a kind," the man beamed, brushing bleached silver hair out of his eyes, "can you handle that, kitty kat?"

"Stop with the pet names," Virgil rolled his eyes and finished inputting the drink, "um.. that will be… $6.69."

"Eyo! Sixty niiiiiiine," the man giggled emphatically while pulling out his money to pay.

Virgil rolled his eyes, "childish. Name for the order?"

"Uh, your phone number."

"What?"

"Damn you don't take hints!" the man placed one hand on his chest and bowed with a flourish, "my name is Remus, and I think you're very cute, kitty kat."

"You are maddening! Just call me Virgil!" he snapped, getting a cup ready to prepare the last drink Remus would ever have, "it's gonna take a minute to pull all those shots. Gosh… that much caffeine could kill you…" Virgil smirked at his own joke.

Remus took the smirk for a friendly smile and grinned, "I got all night for you, Virgil."

"That's cute. I'll let you know when it's ready," Virgil smiled, making direct eye contact as he added his favorite blend of sedatives to Remus’s cup.

It only took 30 seconds before Remus hit the floor with a confused grunt. Virgil was almost impressed the man had downed half the drink in one gulp. Moving quickly, Virgil locked the shop and dragged Remus back behind the counter, binding and gagging the flirtatious idiot. Tonight was going to be so special.

---

It hadn’t been easy, moving both bodies- cursing his weak, pathetic self the entire time. He made sure to dose both of them again after stashing them in the trunk so he could go back and finish out his shift.

He smiled pleasantly at the officers who stopped by just before the morning shift, careful to not give them any reason to be suspicious as he packed up day-old donuts and prepared two drinks nearly as caffeinated as Remus’s drink had been but significantly less poisoned. But still a little poisoned because fuck the police.

It took every muscle in Virgil’s body to not run gleefully to the car when the morning shift came to relieve him from work. He hid his excitement behind his usual persona of snarky disinterest and exhaustion until he was safely in the car and blasting his favorite CD on the drive home.

Pulling directly into the garage, Virgil shut down the car and giggled as the door shut slowly on his prisoners' last hope for rescue. Working at a leisurely pace, Virgil dragged first Remus then the woman down into his basement, both drowsy and barely able to make a complaint. It only seemed fair they die in the order they'd been caught so Virgil laid Remus out on the couch while he tied the woman down to his workbench.

The woman began to moan pathetically just as Virgil was tying down the last limb. It was not a moment too soon. He chuckled to himself and smacked her face a few times to help her wake up.

"Look alive, sunshine! You won't be much longer, I'm afraid," Virgil quipped as she blinked awake and started to panic at the restraints holding her down.

God, he hated when they screamed almost as much as he hated the watches. Virgil waited as long as he could stand the high-pitched whining pleas for freedom and help before loudly shushing until she quieted.

"Shh! Stop yelling or I will restrict your breathing," Virgil hissed, laying a prohibitive finger to her lips, "I promise you'll live longer if you stay quiet."

"You'll let me go?"

"No. I'll just take my time," Virgil smirked as the color drained from her face and her lip began to quiver, "ohh. Ohh, don't be so dramatic, sweetheart. It's time to grow up and realize death is inevitable."

Virgil laughed as she started screaming again, only turning away when Remus stirred from his sleep.

"Oh, dear. You've woken up my other guest. Now you know, he's special. You're going to have the life choked out of you, slowly but surely, but he gets to lose a lot more than his life. Count yourself lucky, sweetheart." Virgil turned to examine the man on the couch again as he blearily blinked up at him.

"You coulda'sked, kitkat," Remus mumbled nearly incomprehensibly. Virgil tilted his head in confusion as he watched Remus. The man slowly regained awareness, and even as Virgil stood above him with a hard frown, he smiled back up at his captor.

"What the hell are you getting on about?" Virgil asked with a growl, hoping to startle that unsettling grin off Remus’ face.

Remus laughed, "you coulda just asked if you wanted to do a scene, cutie! Although I love the attention to realism. Like you actually drugged me to bring me home!"

Virgil stared, completely in shock at what he was hearing, "wait.. you think…"

"That you were too shy to ask me out so you drugged me and dragged me back home? Yes," Remus nodded enthusiastically, "if you have some whips and an electric hand mixer we can have some real fun, you sexy little kitten!" Remus bumped his eyebrows suggestively, leaving Virgil absolutely stunned.

"What is going on here?!?" the woman on the table cried out.

"Shut the hell up!" Virgil barked back at her, too confused to do much more than stare at Remus. Why did he like this? Why did Virgil like that Remus liked this? He felt hot and confused but also certain about one thing he absolutely wanted.

Experimentally he reached down and laid his hand on Remus’ exposed stomach. Watching Remus for his reaction, Virgil slowly slid his hand along the skin and up to Remus’s chest. Remus shut his eyes with a smile and shivered at the touch, "oh yeah, baby. I can purr for you, kitty. Anything you want."

Virgil inhaled sharply, pulling back his hand and looking back at the other prisoner as she lay whimpering on the table.

Well shit, what was he supposed to do with a captive audience?

---

Virgil didn't know what he'd been thinking, letting Remus go after all was said and done. Remus had been fun and so down for all of his sickest fantasies, supplying quite a few of his own. He'd stolen Remus’ watch and put it on the woman's body before shooting both timepieces on her wrist. The ticking had probably driven him to let Remus go. That had to explain it

He dumped the woman as far as he possibly could and hoped beyond reason that Remus wouldn't recognize her in the news and realized what he'd done. For a week he lived in fear of the cops showing up at work or worse his house, armed with search warrants and one hell of a witness. For a week, nothing happened.

It turned out he'd worried for nothing. Just when Virgil began to itch again to get rid of another glowing being, despite the police pressure pushing him to lay low, Remus came back in during his shift.

"Hello, my little purrrfect kitten!" Remus beamed as he walked into the shop.

Virgil froze and slowly turned back to face him, "you- you came back?"

"Mhm. Never got your number but I wanted to see you again, Virgie. Figured we could have some more fun this time," Remus smirked as he leaned casually against the counter, "one usual with the special sauce please!"

"Special sauce?" Virgil asked, still amazed Remus had even come back to the cafe.

"You know," Remus leaned in close and whispered, "the stuff that knocks me out so you can take me home and we can get it on freakier than my last BDSM club"

"Wow, you- you liked it that much?" Virgil let out a low whistle. He studied Remus again, stricken by the fact he didn't glow so much this time. Even though Virgil wanted to take care of another glowing bastard, he was so much more interested in this willing abductee.

"Yeah, I did! That shit's hot as fuck!" Remus beamed. Virgil checked the time on his terminal display and realized it was nearly the time his least favorite police patrons would be making their morning run.

"Look, uh… why don't we save the tranqs for my place?" Virgil smirked as he started to prepare Remus’ strange order, "I'm amazed this drink doesn't put you in a coma already."

Remus giggled, "sometimes it takes a little something extra to get the heart pumping, yeah?"

"Hm. Well, I get off in two hours-"

"I'll be sitting right here in the corner then. I wanna get to know you, Virgie."

"A horrible mistake for you, really," Virgil laughed, heart fluttering far too much.

"Plus I think I left my watch at your place…"

"I haven't seen it this week. We can look though," Virgil lied smoothly, knowing very well the police had the timepiece in evidence.

Remus kept flirting as Virgil cleaned the store and served the early morning crowd, true to his word about waiting to leave with Virgil. They walked out to his car and Remus held out his arm expectantly when they sat down.

"What?" Virgil asked suspiciously.

"You're off the clock, let's get this party started. Surely you have the special stuff in here- you injected me last time."

Virgil flushed, "um.. really? You don't want to wait to know where we're going first?"

"How am I supposed to pretend I'm getting kidnapped if you don't knock me out? At least tie my hands?" Remus bat his eyes at Virgil who rolled his eyes and leaned over to grab a scarf out of the glove box.

"You're ridiculous."

"Yeah but you like it, kitten."

---

Logan stared at the evidence bored, absolutely baffled. In 5 months there had been 18 victims, a consistent signature, and every promise that someone would turn up with a connection to this perp. Or someone should know where these folks had been headed when they fell into the unsub's trap.

And then after Lydia with the two watches- nothing. No bodies were found for weeks. No whisperings of the media-named Black Widower who aggressively mutilated his male victims almost beyond recognition after raping them and humiliated the women after strangling them with silk scarves.

"I just don’t understand. Guys like this don’t go dormant! It's against every drive they have. What are we missing, Patton?"

Patton looked up from his third cup of coffee, "I don't know, Lo. What about the two-unsub theory? Maybe they met up and are keeping each other occupied?"

Logan rolled his eyes, "oh sure. Two serial killers, one who's gay and one who hates women meet and start playing house. Real cute."

"It could happen…" Patton replied defensively, already reaching for a second donut as his partner glared disapprovingly.

"No. I think it's the same unsub. The watches are always shot while the victim wears them. It's consistent. It's a single, unique signature that the media still hasn't published. If it's two different killers, they knew about each other and were purposefully copying each other long before they went dormant."

"Well, I'm not going to complain that we aren't finding more victims. I'd rather people not be mysteriously killed and maimed by the Black Widower...s," Patton lifted his chin defiantly. He stood and walked over to the evidence board, studying the geographic profile again, the map showing a confusing cluster of dumpsites, victim's homes, and last sightings, and puzzled over the strangeness of the case.

"If this case goes cold, we may never find the unsub. He lives his life, free to decide to start again while all of his victims lay rotting in the ground. Their families don't deserve to live with that fear," Logan sighed heavily in near defeat, "of course I don’t want more victims. I want this man caught. Why did he suddenly stop?"

---

For a month, Remus had come in once or twice a week, asking Virgil for the secret sauce and flirting with him until the end of his shift. The randomness of his timing and anticipation of his visits made it impossible for Virgil to hunt. He didn't quite mind because seeing Remus was always better than the thrill of the kill.

Virgil finally relented and watched with quiet admiration as Remus celebrated over getting his number, and their relationship only moved faster after that. Pretty soon Remus was able to convince him to go on an actual date after work, grabbing breakfast at a nearby diner and hitting up his apartment afterward. Virgil had rarely spent so long away from his own home, but being out with Remus made him feel almost normal.

Media slowly stopped covering the Black Widower and Virgil smiled to himself just imagining how frustrated the police must be that they couldn't find him.

Virgil was happy, laying next to his boyfriend who loved him despite almost every eccentricity. He almost believed nothing could go wrong with Remus there.

"Uh, kit kat? I have a bit of a confession to make," Virgil winced, cursing himself for being so naive to believe that foolish sentiment.

"What’s up, dukey?" Virgil rolled to his side to face his boyfriend, "you can tell me anything."

"I don't- promise you won't get mad or like.. react badly?" Remus asked quietly, alarming Virgil even more.

He gently laid a hand on Remus’ neck and rubbed that roughened cheek with his thumb, "what's going on, Rem? You're scaring me."

Remus visibly gulped and whispered, "I know what happened to my watch. Virgil, I've always known.."

Virgil pulled back slowly. So this is what it actually felt like to be caught. His heart hammered in his throat, making a verbal reply impossible. He strained to not start crushing Remus’ throat and his own heart in his panic. This was love and this was a threat and god the way Remus looked at him right now only complicated everything else so much more.

He wasn't scared. He wasn't wriggling away from Virgil’s touch. Remus stared death in the eye unflinchingly.

He'd always figured his boyfriend must be brave or stupid, but Virgil hadn't counted on both.

"I know… what you are… and I still fell in love with you, Virgil. If you're gonna… could you at least drug me first and let me kiss you with my last breath?"

Very quickly several pieces fell into place as Virgil stared at the man who loved him despite every flaw and couldn't even beg for his own safety or life.

Remus knew what happened the night they met.

Remus had made the connections to the other murders and the subsequent drought of victims.

Remus could have turned him in- directly to the officers at the shop a half dozen times and a hundred other times when they weren’t spending time together.

Remus loved him.

Remus loved him and was scared of this confrontation.

Remus was not scared of dying.

Killing his boyfriend would be the exact link the cops would need to capture him.

Not killing his boyfriend for knowing his secret would be the largest risk imaginable.

Virgil couldn’t live without Remus

His hand was slowly choking Remus out despite his reluctance to take action.

Virgil gasped and pushed Remus away roughly, darting out of the bed and down the hall. He didn't stop until he heard Remus calling out for him.

Shit.

"Virgil!" his voice came out hoarse and painfully weak sounding. Virgil knew he should run.

But Remus was calling for him. And this was his fault.

"Virgil?" it was a question, asked in a voice that couldn't get enough air to support itself. He could leave and Remus would probably die a very painful death, all alone, with his fingers and palm emblazoned in the bruising that would provide the cause of death.

Remus loved him. He couldn't let this be the end.

Virgil flew back into the bedroom, grabbed the landline, and made the call.

"Remus, I am so sorry. Just keep breathing, baby. I am so so sorry!" Virgil apologized profusely, waiting for the emergency operator to pick up.

---

Hospital staff had to pry Virgil from Remus’ side as they moved him quickly into the O.R. Virgil paced and wondered how exactly to explain Remus’s injuries without getting arrested to distract himself from the fear that Remus would die in surgery.

He should have never let himself get so close to someone so smart and funny and perfect and… glowing. Virgil sat and waited for the doctor's verdict, pulling his hood over his eyes to block out the throngs of injured, sick, frantically glowing people around him.

Ages passed until Virgil heard his name and looked up suddenly for the source. A doctor and a police officer stood before him and all of the adrenaline in his body screamed that he needed to run.

"Uh.. how is he, doc?" Virgil asked, fighting himself to not scream or make a scene.

"Remus Crowne is currently in recovery and you may visit him. Due to the nature of his injuries, we have contacted the police to speak with him first," the doctor intoned, voice dripping with suspicion.

The officer took the pause to speak up, "would you like to make a statement, Mr. Kier?"

"I just want to see him," Virgil replied in a raspy voice, shaking his head in denial as he stood.

"Very well. This way, sir," the doctor led Virgil and the officer back towards the recovery rooms. When they arrived, Virgil nearly choked seeing Remus talking with the same two officers who came into his shop each morning. The shorter one knelt beside the bed to hold Remus’ hand. He spoke softly and asked all the questions while his partner stood tall and took notes, looking incredulously at the injured man. Virgil instinctively wanted to barge in and protect Remus from these pigs but the third held him back with a firm hand on his shoulder.

Before long the two officers left the room, eyeing Virgil disdainfully. He waited for the words that would send his world crashing around him even more than it already had.

"You- you can go in now, hon," Virgil's head tilted in confusion as the third officer let him go, "just be more careful in the future."

"I- what? No charges?" Virgil barely whispered, glancing towards the bed where Remus laid watching the tv.

"Believe me, if it had been me, I don’t care how consensual- I would have pressed charges for sending me to the E.R. have a good day, sir. Come along, Patton." The stricter-looking cop turned, gesturing to the kinder one and all three left quickly. Virgil beamed and ran to Remus’ side.

"You're welcome, kitten," Remus coughed and reached for Virgil’s hand.

"I'm so sorry- I didn't want to, Rem-"

"Shhhh. I told them it was a sex fantasy gone a bit too far. If I'd known you liked strangling dudes too-"

"Now you shush!" Virgil leaned in close, "you get better fast now, okay?"

"I always wanted to date a serial killer.. promise you won't leave me over this?" Remus grinned weakly up at Virgil, "I could help you, ya know."

"Shhhh this is just the pain meds talking. You don’t know a serial killer," Virgil laughed as tears of relief streamed down his cheeks. He gave Remus a dramatic stage wink and held his hand securely.

"Aww, you're right. I'm just stuck with a pretty boy who doesn't know his own strength," Remus grinned and watched Virgil rather than the tv until a nurse came to shoo his boyfriend away for the night.

Remus couldn't wait for their first hunt together.

#dukexietyweek2021 #dukexiety #virgil sanders #remus sanders #logan sanders #patton sanders #serial killer au #coffee shop au #please please please mind the content warning #please remember that reblogs help more than likes ^ ^#shit i'm like 10 minutes late nooooo

35 notes · View notes

fanfic-she-wrote · 3 years

Text

A Cute Mistake: Part 2

No warnings just fluff

The next morning you awoke and found Dracula gone as usual. As he slept you found you had ample amount of time to learn the spell you needed. You got up and stretched letting out a long yawn as you went. As you made your way to your office a sudden thought occured to you. How did Dracula get in his coffin? You took off in the opposite direction and went toward his bedroom hoping he wasn't a pile of ashes when you got there. You flung open the door and stepped inside, your eyes immediately darting to the coffin, which remained unopened. Oh no. Hurriedly you searched the castle hoping he had managed to hide himself away somewhere. Finally, you found him lying under your bed with his belly up looking content. You let out a sigh of relief. Gosh, he was so adorable right now. You thought, resisting the urge to touch his soft fluffy belly. Surely, he would kill you for that. Quietly you left the room, not wanting to stir him from his peaceful slumber even though you really wanted to.

Most of the day you spent immersed in your books and practicing the spell hoping that by the time Dracula woke up you could change him back. You hadn't even noticed the light slowly fading to darkness as the hours slipped by. It wasn't until you heard scratching at the door that you realized just how late it was. You put your wand down and opened the door to see Dracula on the other side.

"Have you learned the spell?" He asked stepping into the room, eager to return back to his normal self.

"Hello to you too." You mumbled, shutting the door behind you. "You'd be pleased to know that I have."

"Good! Then let's get this over with." Dracula said, sounding a slightly relieved as he sat on the floor in front of you. You grabbed your wand and took a deep breath, preparing yourself. Slowly you flourished your wand in a circle around him while speaking a strange incantation as you did so. He quirked his head to the side and watched you. How attractive you looked when you were in your element. Once you finished the spell you gave your wand a quick flick. Smoke emerged from the tip of your wand and suddenly englufed you, obscuring your vision. How strange, you thought. You didn't remember there being this much smoke the last time. "Y/N?" You heard Dracula call out nervously.

"Yes, Im here." You responded. "Did it work?" You asked as the smoke slowly began to dissipate.

"I don't think so." He replied, once he caught sight of you.

"Crap!" You exclaimed as you came face to face with Dracula noticing that he still remained a cat. "Hey, what am I doing down here?" You asked, suddenly realizing that you were no longer looking down at Dracula but eye level with him. "Oh no..." You gulped, running to the nearest mirror and to your horror a black cat stared back at you. "What have I done?!" You shrieked looking at yourself in the mirror, your mouth hung open in shock. You were hopeless...You thought despairingly to yourself.

Dracula felt bad and in an attempt to comfort you he rubbed his head against yours. "I'm sorry." He said softly.

"I'm the one that should be sorry. I'm such an awful witch. I can't even perform basic transfiguration spells..." You uttered.

"No you're not. I've seen you do plenty of great things. Everybody is allowed an off day every now and then." He assured you. You gave him a small appreciative smile and a kiss on his cheek. (Which in cat terms was with your tongue.) It was almost instinctive, like you had unintentionally adapted some cat characteristics.

"Oh sorry!" You apologized, pulling away realizing what you had done. Dracula blinked not knowing quite what to think about that. This was all very strange.

"Is there any other way you can change us back?" Dracula asked.

"Well, we could always wait till the spell wears off." You told him.

"How long does that take?" He groaned, dreading the answer.

"It's unpredictable. Sometimes a couple days sometimes a week." You answered.

Dracula sighed. "Well, at least it's not permanent." He added gratefully with a shrug.

"So what do cats do?" You asked trying to figure out what to do. He stared ahead blankly for a moment.

"I'm not sure. Eat and sleep mostly." He replied.

"Well I guess this as good time as ever to catch up on my reading." You sighed heading back towards your desk.

"I'll join you." Dracula said following you. He had read a little bit about witchcraft before, but there were some things he was still curious about.

You looked up at your desk feeling slightly intimidated by how high it suddenly was. "I can do this." You assured yourself as you bent your knees and wiggled your butt, preparing yourself to jump. Dracula chuckled watching you, noting how cute you were. Then you pounced and you almost made it too, but it wasn't quite far enough. You slid down digging your claws in trying to catch onto something, but unfortunately the only thing you managed to grab was some papers. "No, no, no!" You gasped as you slid the rest of the way down landing on the floor with a thump, covered in papers.

Dracula stood over you, his eyebrow cocked. "That was graceful." He remarked.

"Let's see you do it then." You scoffed as you got up and shook yourself off. Dracula nodded his head confidently and approached the side of the table. In one carefully coordinated leap he reached the top with ease. He turned around and grinned down at you triumphantly. "Piece of cake."

You groaned. "Show off." And readied yourself once more, this time you finally made it to the top.

Quietly, you and Dracula read some of your textbooks together. Trying to read with paws certainly made things interesting. For one thing it made it difficult to turn the pages. But turning the pages wouldn't be the only problem you would encounter, after all your week (or if you were lucky earlier) learning how to be a cat had just begun.

Thoughout the week several more random incidents occured. Eating became a bit of a chore. Without thumbs it became nearly impossible to raid the cabinets or icebox. After many failed attempts you just settled for whatever you could get your paws on which was mostly bread.

However there were many positives to being a cat. You quite liked how flexible and agile you were, being able to jump from one location to another, especially high places. As the days passed your new favorite activity was finding some place to hide and jumping out at Dracula trying to scare him. Most of the time it worked and when it did, he chased you around the castle till finally you surrendered.

As the week slowly drew to a close, you were actually kind of happy that this had happened. That you both were able to take a break and enjoy yourselves. Secretly, Dracula felt the same although he would never admit it.

As you two sat sharing a chair by the fire, dozing off you suddenly felt a little strange, like the entire world was spinning. You closed your eyes wishing it would stop and then when you finally felt better you slowly opened them again this time you found yourself sitting on Dracula's lap in your human form. "It's over." He sighed, holding you. You wrapped your arms around his neck and smiled, suddenly realizing how much you had missed seeing his handsome face.

"Now that wasn't so bad, was it?" You asked.

"Not from where I'm sitting." He said, leaning in and giving you a well over due kiss. How he missed kissing your soft lips. Kissing you as a cat was definitely not something he would miss, and for that matter neither would you. You loved him the way he was and you wouldn't change it for the world whether he was a vampire or a cat, you loved him all the same.

#hope you liked it!#not my best #im pushing through a writers block at the moment #maybe ill write dracula and van helsing as cats some day #dracula x reader #x reader #reader insert #christopher lee

40 notes · View notes

styleiswild · 3 years

Text

Interview with Beastie Boys for Machina magazine, 07/1998

By: Rafał Bryndal

Translation: Anna Bak ( @styleiswild )

-------------

Introduction: The party called Beastie Boys in Lisbon went on for two days. On the first day we (the journalists) were invited to the magical “Kremlin” club to listen to the new album [Hello Nasty]. I don’t think I have to explain how I felt knowing that I was possibly one of the first Polish people to listen to that phenomenal record. On the second day each of us got to meet the band in Hotel Ritz during the so-called “round-table.” It’s like a private conversation with the artists. It looks a bit like a coffee party at your aunt’s. (…) The whole meeting was just as absurd, in a positive way. The answers they gave us were often ironic, as one could expect.

R.B.: Don’t you think that being Beastie Boys is way cooler than being any other band in the world?

MCA: Unfortunately, we haven’t tried being a different band yet. So I can’t really answer your question.

Mike D: To be honest, there’s something to it. Maybe because we have so much fun working together. It’s not always fun, of course. We do work from time to time, but only sometimes.

R.B.: It seems like you work on your albums for fun and pleasure exclusively?

Mike D: I think it’s because we don’t release them that often.

Ad-Rock: Yes… Yes, you must be right, man.

MCA: Hey, we’d released Ill Communication after a two year break.

R.B.: Yeah, but this one took you four years.

MCA: Yeah, we had to level it out. It takes us three years most of the time.

R.B.: You grew up together. Are you always on such good terms with one another?

MCA: Sometimes there’ll be tripartite fights. Not sure you’ve ever seen what it looks like when three people fight each other. Each of them against the other two. That happens sometimes. Rarely, though. To be honest, we don’t really argue much.

R.B.: Your new album seems a bit like a departure from The In Sound from Way Out!

Mike D: Hello Nasty is a collection of a dozen or so songs, each of them stylistically different. That’s why you can’t really compare it to our previous releases. I guess, though, that at least two of the songs would’ve worked well as instrumentals on the previous album.

R.B.: How do you deal with the new technologies in music?

Mike D: Technology is present in all genres today and you can’t run from that. Music evolves largely thanks to the new technology. Especially hip hop music. We do it like the true rappers do, which means we start with a drum machine, then we put it on a loop, and then we use digital delay system. That’s one of the newest inventions. Technology is unpredictable, because people – who are its creators – have no clue about what the artists can do with it.

R.B.: Is it true what they say on the internet? That this album is the first one of the three that you’ve recorded lately?

MCA: You’ve really heard about that?

Mike D: Gosh, you can’t keep anything secret today.

Ad-Rock: Three? To be honest, we’ve got many more albums recorded.

Mike D: The last one of the three is a country album. The genre is so popular that you can’t really keep such a record a secret anymore. Especially when you’re in Manhattan and you walk around in a cowboy fit, it’s suspicious as hell. Because there aren’t many cowboys in Manhattan. People see a guy in a cowboy fit and assume that he has to be working on a country album.

R.B.: Is it really so important for your clothes to fit the style of your music?

MCA: You identify with your music more when you dress up. People often cheat, they wear clothes that don’t fit the music they play.

R.B.: So what kind of clothes did you guys wear when working on Hello Nasty?

MCA: I wore a bat girl costume.

Ad-Rock: I dressed up as a scared woman.

Mike D: I’d wear a bathing suit, because I wanted to go swimming all the time.

Ad-Rock: We couldn’t really find what we were looking for at first. We tried on a range of fits and finally found those that went well with our music.

R.B.: You’ve been popular with skateboarders. It’s a group of people who wear unique clothes and listen to a lot of your music, as it seems. Do you identify with this subculture?

MCA: I don’t think it’s just that one subculture. There are a few more we’d like to identify with.

Mike D: For me it’s long gone. Skateboarding isn’t much of an extreme or exclusive kind of sports discipline anymore. It’s become very popular.

R.B.: You’ve worked with Lee “Scratch” Perry on the new album. Can you tell me what kind of benefits did that bring you?

Mike D: It’s hard to say, but we’ve always been pretty impressed with his work on dub music. He’s also inspired Mario Caldato, our studio engineer. For me, Lee is an artist of science, a living fucking legend.

R.B.: Do you think that you can inspire young musicians?

MCA: Sure, but that’s a normal thing, right? If music is evolving as a part of culture, then everything and everyone inspires that process. We’re happy that we can be a part of that culture to some degree.

R.B.: A lot of white kids have gotten into rap music thanks to “Rhymin’ & Stealin’.” At least that’s what happened to me…

MCA: As a white kid… Right, it’s hard to be a black kid in Finland.

Mike D: We discovered hip hop when we were thirteen or fourteen. We’d go and see Public Enemy and bands like that. We were totally enchanted. It’s not that weird that kids who listen to us want to do the same thing.

R.B.: Some people say that you don’t like it when other artists sample your music. Some say that you’re more liberal, though.

MCA: It all depends on how the sample is used. If it’s creative, then we’re here for it. But if they go and copy our own ideas, and the whole track revolves around that idea, then we’re obviously pissed off.

R.B.: Are you as satisfied with making music as you’re with your magazine and your record label?

MCA: It’s all really about creating something new, publishing the mag, recording albums or playing gigs… We’re really into humanitarian work, too. Sure, the music is the most important thing of all. Nobody knows where it comes from, it’s hard to define the process of making music. It comes from subconsciousness.

R.B.: I’ve heard that you were to make a movie based on your “Sabotage” video?

Mike D: Unfortunately, that’s not true.

MCA: It doesn’t change the fact that we’re planning to make a movie…

R.B.: About what?

MCA: You can actually watch it in the cinema already, because Spice Girls had stolen our screenplay and made it their own.

R.B.: In the 80s there were a lot of humanitarian aids, like benefit concerts during which quite a lot of money got lost for a very simple reason. Those actions were organized on such a grand scale that it was nearly impossible to control the funds. Aren’t you scared that the same thing can happen to your organization?

MCA: Free Tibet is there to help people find out about the issue and educate them on it. The money that we get helps us organize the Tibetan Freedom Concerts. It’s not like those other actions from the past that were strictly about collecting funds.

R.B.: Do you believe that the bands you invite to play consider the gigs something more than simply another type of self-promotion?

MCA: I feel that most of those artists are really moved by the issue we’re trying to bring to people’s attention.

R.B.: You’re fighting for free Tibet, while recently it’s been 50 years since the State of Israel was formed. And Palestinians are fighting for their rights to be respected. Why have you taken on Tibet and not Palestine?

MCA: Tibetans’ fight is based on the idea of non-violence. It’s a peaceful fight. The contrast between the brutality of the Chinese government and that quiet fight of Tibetans does make an impression, and that’s why we’re popularizing the ideas behind the Tibetan struggle. We believe that the non-violent, peaceful act is the only logical way of dealing with the issue.

R.B.: Even if the peaceful fight ends up leading to the extinction of Tibetan culture?

MCA: The same thing will happen if Tibetans decide to use violence as a means to gain their freedom.

R.B.: Is it true that your music is banned in Hong Kong?

MCA: That’s right. We can’t play there. Our albums can’t be sold on their market. All of the bands playing for Milarepa are banned from performing in China.

R.B.: You’ve met Dalai Lama on several occasions. Does he like your music?

MCA: Dalai Lama doesn’t listen to pop music at all. Lots of bands give him their CDs. He takes them because he doesn’t want them to feel bad, but he won’t give them a listen.

Ad-Rock: That’s why he stores so many demos at home.

R.B. What is Dalai Lama like?

MCA: He’s fantastic. He’s a great role model, representing all of the values people associate with Tibetan culture, with Buddhism. He’s got great charisma. He oozes calmness that comes from the respect he has for everyone.

R.B. What’s his opinion on Tibetan Freedom Concert?

MCA: He thinks it’s an excellent way of spreading his word. For him, the concert is a kind of holiday.

R.B.: As far as I know, you have a slightly different view on the future of Tibet. He wants to negotiate with the Chinese government about Tibet’s legal right to autonomy in China, while you fight for total freedom for Tibet as a sovereign country. Is that true?

MCA: It’s related to his view on the type of fight. He’s so scared of any form of violence that he’s ready to negotiate with the Chinese government. He’s choosing the lesser of two evils, that’s what he’s doing. We’re in a completely different situation, though. As American citizens, we want to speak with our government about freedom for Tibet. We believe that Tibetans should be free and we want to encourage the government to take action to help Tibetans gain autonomy.

R.B.: The “Sabotage” music video was unique and quite shocking. Are your new clips going to be equally as original?

Ad-Rock: It’s gonna be some good shit.

MCA: We had lots of fun working on it. The “Sabotage” video had a lot to do with the song, though. Our new clips won’t have anything to do with the songs. They can be treated as independent short features. We plan to make a couple more totally different clips.

R.B.: You’ve been a band for so long that you must be best friends and not only, let’s say, collaborators. Can you please describe one another?

Mike D: Adam Horovitz is, to use basketball terminology, the play maker. He shows us how we’re supposed to play because he’s the one in charge of the balls. Sometimes he can’t score from a distance, though. Adam Yauch, on the other hand, is a very unusual power forward. His style is completely devoid of aggression, unlike Karl Malone’s. Or Charles Barkley’s. He can dull his opponent’s vigilance with his slow moves and get all the points.

Ad-Rock: Mike is an idiot and a thief. Yauch is a liar. I’m as cool as James Bond.

Mike D: Some people might say that we’re CSC. Crazy Sexy Cool. And that’s what we wanna be.

R.B.: Can you explain your record cover? You’re in a tin and you look like sardines.

Mike D: Doesn’t it sound pretty? “Sardine tin”? It’s almost like a big surprise. You open the tin and it turns out that people’s lives are similar to the life of sardines.

MCA: Maybe this album was recorded by sardines and you’re now talking to them? Who does know?

#beastie boys #mca #adam yauch #ad rock #adam horovitz #mike d #michael diamond #1998 #90s #hello nasty #hello nasty era #scans #interview #music interview #beastie boys interview #this is not an ‘official’ translation ofc #done it in my free time #my posts

29 notes · View notes

spectrumed · 3 years

Text

10. contact

The key to success is networking. Oh, God, how am I ever going to succeed? Networking? Talking to other people? Making friends? That’s not me, that’s not me at all. I don’t want to make superficial connections with other people just so that I can one day use my connections to get ahead in life. I don’t want to force myself on others, trying to convince them that I am some decent guy that’s totally worth getting to know and be friends with. I don’t know if you’re going to like me or not. I imagine some people would like to be my friend, and I imagine some people would hate to be my friend. I’d rather just forget about the latter group, and not torture myself trying to make friends with people who are fundamentally at odds who I am as a person. I’d rather have a small circle of close friends than a thousand acquaintances. But the key to success is networking.

I’ll never be an insider. This is not me just doubting myself, not some decision to undermine myself. I know that making statements about things that are impossible for you to achieve comes across as very self-defeating, but I know that I will never be an insider. I will never fit into a social clique. I am not going to be part of the boys’ club, yucking it up with my mates. I’m not going to be in any gangs, no bands, most certainly no crews. I am a solo-player. I prefer to work on my own. All my life, I’ve kept to myself, one way or another. I don’t ask for help. Growing up, my sister used to get a lot of help from my mother with school assignments, because she wanted it and she asked for it. My sister and my mother would spend a lot of time together making sure that my sister’s schoolwork turned out well. Looking over spelling, fixing grammatical errors, making sure that the text was easy to read and had a flow to it. Normal parental stuff, really. Kids are supposed to get help from their parents, it’s part of the learning process, no-one gets by all on their own. Well, except for me. I never asked for help.

I actually found it really unbearable to have my mother look over my schoolwork to see if I made any errors. Not because I am such a horrid narcissist that I refuse to admit that there were any errors, but rather because… well, it felt invasive. Like as if you spot someone spying on you through your window. It made me feel very self-conscious, in a way that I realise now is similar to how I feel when I make eye contact. Yes, I am bad at making eye contact, especially when I am speaking at the same time. I don’t mind making eye contact when you are speaking, but I don’t want to make eye contact with you when I am speaking. Is that funny? Is that odd? Well, the way I feel about it is that eye contact is intimate, it’s almost like touching. It’s mental touching. If you share eye contact with somebody you are sharing a connection. You are mind-touching each other. Oh, well… I guess that maybe it’s not quite like that, but I still don’t find it easy.

At times, I find much of the discussions about neurodiversity online somewhat off-putting. Especially when it comes to those people who are really keen on being all out positive, all the time. Those people who see any shade of negativity as outright hazardous. Don’t bring up the fact that being neurodivergent can be difficult, don’t mention the difficulties that come with being on the autism spectrum. Engage with self-empowerment! Celebrate what makes you different! Go out there and be proud of yourself, be happy about your autism, it is cool to be autistic! And, sure, I understand the importance of injecting optimism into the neurodivergent community. We need optimism, we need to profess our desire to be happy, to show the world that you don’t need to be neurotypical to be content with your life. No-one wants to be around a sourpuss just wallowing in their discontentment. But, sometimes things just suck, okay? Having a positive attitude may project confidence, may make others think you’ve got it together, but be wary when that positive attitude just becomes a mask you hide behind.

Look, we live in a society. Whether you like it or not, you live in a society. We need to rage against this society, because this society is no good. Things may look good to some people, but those people are wrong, and I am right. I’m mad as hell and I’m not going to take it anymore! Let’s have ourselves a little revolution and see if we can piece a new society together, one that doesn’t commit to the same mistakes as the last one. Oh, wait, how do we do that? And how do we make sure that we win the revolution, we could easily lose, and that might actually just make things worse for us. What if this society we live in got even worse? Yikes, that’s a thought too scary to even really consider. Can things get worse? I don’t want things to get worse. Maybe I just shouldn’t rock the boat. Let’s calm down, and let’s not make any rash decisions here. We can overthrow society at some other point. For now, let’s just have some tea.

Yes, society stinks, but what can you do about it? It is absolutely the case that neurotypical people have it easier navigating modern society than neurodivergent people. Others expect you to function just like they function. If you wish to fit in, you are required to act more neurotypical. People expect that from you. Learn to adapt, to hide amongst them. Trick them. Make them think you are one of them. Be the wolf in sheep’s clothing. They’ll never know the truth of who you are. An outsider that managed to get on the inside. You stand by the watercooler, and by gosh, you make yourself laugh at their jokes even though you’d rather not be there at all. You partake in the small talk, talking about the weather, feigning interest in the footballs, and pretending to be an all-around wholesome compatriot. You’re not at all secretly some kind of anti-social misfit, who’d rather stay at home sitting behind a monitor and playing strategy games on your own. Do you want to come and join your workmates for a drink or two later? Oh, yes, of course you’d like that, but you might need to limit your alcohol intake so that you don’t get too drunk and begin to let the mask slip. It’s too easy getting into hyper-specific rants about obscure topics no normal person would care about when you’re inebriated, so let’s not risk that.

“Be yourself.” Pfth, bah, humbug. Neurotypicals love to state empty platitudes. You don’t want me to be myself. You’ve made it very clear that you don’t want me to be myself. Call me a cynic all you want, but you can’t get nowhere in life simply by being yourself. For better or worse, authenticity is nowhere near as desired as some people make it out to be. Name a single really successful person who is truly themselves. Fake-authenticity does better than the real deal. True sincerity, of the kind that’s naked, shameless, ugly, and challenging, it is difficult to love. And that’s not all bad, it’s just a fact of life. We all need to cover some things about ourselves up, and need to keep some secrets, because that is what is expected from us. Just as we wear clothes to cover up our naked bodies. No shame on the nudists, they’re free to embrace whatever alternative lifestyle they want, but I don’t want to see your naked body. Don’t get nude in front of me. I already struggle with eye contact, I sure wouldn’t struggle less if you stood in front of me nude as well.

Actually, to a certain extent, these social rules we all conform to can actually be quite appreciated by those of us who are on the spectrum. It is easier to know what you must do in a formal social situation than in a casual social situation. Casual people, they’re just so… unpredictable. Sticking their casual bits everywhere, acting like guests at your house who don’t seem to understand that your home is not their home. Even as a kid I hated having friends of mine over at my place. They’d play with my toys, place my toys where they don’t belong, or even worse, they may break some of my toys. Don’t touch that, it’s mine. Don’t put your icky hands on my bed, I sleep there. Don’t rip pages out of that book, it’s my favourite book. Don’t breathe in my room, I breathe in my room. I just can’t handle you coming here and disturbing the peace. I had it all ordered, I knew where everything was, and I liked it. Now you brought with you the forces of chaos, and dealing with that is just now what I had in mind for today.

I could never be a freemason. Sure, I have some good ideas for how to secretly rule the world, but if you’re a freemason, you’re expected to be part of the team. There’s no “I” in freemasonry. The secret cabal that controls all of the world’s governments, they don’t want independent folks like me to show up thinking that I can do my work assignments on my own. The Illuminati is run by a committee. You don’t get far in that world by being some freewheeling bohemian incapable of getting along with others. You don’t establish a New World Order by promoting self-reliance. Institutions are great for those who like to get chummy with their pals, the gregarious sorts who know exactly who to talk to in order to advance in the ranks. You scratch my back, and I’ll scratch yours. Favours for favours. One of the reasons why I inherently distrust many institutions is because they are rife with nepotism. You know that whoever gets to sit on the high council of the Illuminati didn’t get there via competency alone. No, they knew a guy, who was cousins with this other guy, who used to work for this guy, and y’know, you pull one string and suddenly there you are on top of the social hierarchy. Most often people get promoted, not because they do good work, but because they happen to know the right people. But again, maybe I’m just being cynical.

I’ve had a recurring fantasy, in the past, of being a lighthouse keeper. Living out somewhere all on my own, not having to deal with any human relationships. Maybe I could befriend a seagull, but even that seems a little too much. Seagulls can be very needy. No, I’d just get on with whatever I’d most like to be doing, writing or making art, just enjoying my solitude. I imagine that the toughest thing about being a lighthouse keeper is the loneliness, but the loneliness is only a plus for me. I’ve long ago decided to like being lonely. I don’t want to face the fact that I too yearn for company, I like to pretend as if I am fine with being alone. So the fantasy of being a lighthouse keeper is perfect for me, I could get far away from society and I could earn a living not having to give a fuck about what others think about me. I could allow myself to get as weird as I would want to get, not having to wash my image, acting like I’m all rational and well-adjusted. It would just be me and my seagull. How simple life would be. Too bad I think most lighthouses are automated, these days.

Maybe being the perpetual malcontent cynic incapable of fitting with mainstream society isn’t all so bad. In some regards, I have made that my brand. Generally, I like to think that I don’t take myself too seriously, but like a lot of people, I’ve turned those edgier parts of my personality into armour that I wear to protect myself from the scorn of others. You can’t accuse me of being a miserable piece of shit when I’ve decided to make being a miserable piece of shit my thing. It’s what I am, and I am not going to change. I’m not really all that mean, or nasty. I am fairly cynical, but I don’t act like some asshole. I don’t think anyone is upset with me for how I act. I’ve only occasionally gotten told off for being too gloomy. But the problem here does not lie with how I end up treating others, but rather how I end up treating myself. I don’t want to make cynicism part of my sense of self. I don’t want to be this person, this misanthrope who only sees problems, and never celebrates the good things in life. I should engage with self-empowerment. I should be happy.

It’s okay being neurodivergent! Sure, you may find other people strange or foreign, with their yapping mouths and their over-eager desire to look you directly in the eyes, but just ignore them! Neurotypicals are just so last century, the future is all neurodivergent! You’re on the right side of history, bud! You’re cool, and radical, and you’re absolutely a sexy little cupcake. You either learn to love yourself, or you lose yourself. Make funny memes, find some online community to be a part of. You can absolutely be a freemason if you want to be a freemason. Don’t let your diagnosis get in your way, so long as you’ve got that inner fire driving you, you can be anything you want to be. Go ahead and rule the world, babe. Remember, what doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger, and right now, it’s good vibes only.

#neurodivergent #neurodiversity #autism spectrum disorder #autism #aspergers #mental health

10 notes · View notes

kittyprincessofcats · 3 years

Text

RWBY Volume 8, Episode 13 (Worthy)

Well, wow. That sure was an episode that happened.

Thoughts under the cut.

Anyone who leaves spoilers for episode 14 on this will get blocked.

- First of all, I want to now talk about the spoiler I saw for this episode last week, to put the anger from my last post into context: After I had just finished watching episodes 8-12 and started writing my post about them, I went into one of the RWBY tags bc I’m dumb and saw a post that said (I don’t remember the exact words, but more or less): “I’m so glad Yang is finally dead, so now her fans can shut up about her and everyone can ship Blacksun instead.”

… Yeah. Imagine seeing that when you haven’t seen the actual episode and have no idea what really happened. I honestly completely panicked for a few minutes, before remembering I don’t actually know anything and this might just be a “Weiss gets impaled in Volume 5, but one episode later it turns out she’ll be fine” situation. So then I had to look up what actually happened to Yang, because otherwise I wouldn’t have been able to sleep. So, to the person who made that post: Fuck you. Not only did you freak people out for no reason (because come on, there’s no way falling into the void actually kills you – and even if it does, we at least definitely don’t know that for sure after episode 13), but even if Yang had actually died, it’s super shitty that your first reaction to a beloved queer character’s death would be “yay, now people can ship my m/f ship instead”. Like, I don’t care if you personally dislike Yang/ dislike Bumbleby/ prefer Blacksun – show a little bit of decency.

Phew. Sorry, I had to get that off my chest because it really made me angry. Now let’s get into the actual episode:

- “Worthy” as a title pretty much already made me predict that Cinder would succeed in her plan, since “you have to be worthy” was what Watts told her in his speech. She’s gotten the message and is now back to efficient plans – and while I love to see it, it also very much scares me when it comes to our heroes’ survival chances. The last time Cinder was doing well, we lost Pyrrha, so… help.

- And gosh, this whole episode was so intense! I feel like it mostly set up a bunch of very intense situations that are going to escalate in the last episode that I’m very much not ready for.

- I still think the whole central location between the worlds is really beautiful, if dangerous. (They should have specified to Ambrosius that they want handrails or something.)

- Nora using her hammer like a witch’s broom was amazing.

- I also loved the scene with Jaune and the people at the train station; that was really funny.

- The middle of the desert might not have been the best place for the exit. Didn’t the group consider that there might be a sandstorm or something else unpredictable out there? Couldn’t they have picked a better exit point?

- Cinder causing an explosion in the middle of the evacuation that throws multiple people into the void was bad and all – but it was still one hell of an entrance!

- I love that now that Cinder realized that she has to rely on teamwork, she’s suddenly being so nice to everyone. Apologizing to Neo, complimenting Watts on “tearing the kingdom apart with nothing but his intellect”, that soft “You deserve this, Arthur”, complimenting Team RWBY on their plan, thanking them for teaching her “one last lesson”. Yeah, maybe she’s just talking to Neo and Watts like this because she needs their help, and to Team RWBY because she’s confident she’ll win – but it’s still amazing to see the shift in her attitude and how she’s clearly changed her tactic.

- It’s insane to me that some people correctly predicted that Cinder would ask Jinn the last question based JUST on the fact that there’s a part in the opening where everyone else freezes in time while she walks past them. Holy hell! I love trying to guess stuff based on the intro, but I would have never thought that far.

- Cinder’s question to Jinn seems like a waste considering it was Jinn’s last question, but maybe it just seems that way to us as viewers because Jinn didn’t reveal anything we didn’t already know. Was it the right thing for Cinder to do? I don’t know, to be honest. Yes, it did give her the chance to ruin the heroes’ plans, but I have a feeling Salem won’t be happy about the question being gone. Pretty sure Salem was going to ask Jinn how to get the Beacon relic, and now she can’t do that. (Cinder ruining Salem’s plans for the beacon relic? Let that be foreshadowing, please.) I mean, maybe it’s worth it from Salem’s POV if it gets them the staff and then she’ll have 2 of the 4 relics – but they could have still gotten the staff later, while I don’t know if Salem has any plan B for the beacon relic. And I’m a little worried about Cinder now. I always thought that Salem wouldn’t kill Cinder no matter what, because she still needs the Fall Maiden for the beacon relic – but if she now has to wait another 100 years for the beacon relic anyway, I’m not sure if she’ll have a reason to keep Cinder alive. (And I’m still worried about that “Some lives will end much too soon” line playing over that scene of Cinder clutching her Grimm arm in the opening.) I also wonder if Cinder even knew that this was Jinn’s last question. Did Jinn even tell her that? Also, when will the 100 years even be up? Do the questions just reset every 100 years regardless of when they were used? So maybe we’re already at year 80 or something and will only have to wait 20 years?

- The cut from everyone at the central command place screaming to them being dead was kinda funny in a “very dark humour” way.

- When Harriet first jumped onto that ship with the bomb, I, like an idiot, thought that she was finally being sensible and trying to get the bomb as far away from Atlas and Mantle as possible, not that she was trying to still drop it on Mantle. She and Ironwood might as well be working for Salem’s team at this point, because they’re doing everything to help the villains’ plan. And the villains are even counting on it! Watts freed Ironwood from his cell and is piloting Harriet’s ship. Those two are just straight up helping Salem’s team in their attempts to… what was it? Save Atlas?

- Ironwood killing Jacques was awful and proves once again that Ironwood has zero morals left. And I didn’t like Jacques, but that was the kind of death that absolutely no one deserves. He had no way to escape or fight back, he was defenseless, locked up in a prison cell with nowhere to run – that’s not just a murder, that’s an execution without a trial. And Jacques wasn’t even a threat, he wasn’t in the way of any of Ironwood’s plans. Ironwood killed him literally just because he could. And no one who thinks they’re the good guy (and Ironwood still thinks he’s the good guy) should go around just killing people who aren’t even a threat.

- And then we have Yang falling into the void. Honestly, as heartbreaking as Blake’s sobs and anger are, I kind of love this from a “supreme angst, let’s see my faves suffer” perspective. That said, Yang better actually be fine or else.

- Actually, my prediction is that the rest of team RWBY will jump into the void to save Yang in the last episode. Because they’re all falling in the opening, and because “Sometimes it’s worth it all to risk the fall and fight for every life”. That’s pretty much the only prediction I feel somewhat confident about, for the rest I have no idea.

- I wonder if it would have been better if Penny had just gone through the doorway and gotten the staff to Vacuo. I get why she didn’t, because Yang just fell and her other friends were in danger… but at the same time, she was supposed to protect the population and the staff (and she has the maiden powers that I’m sure Cinder still wants). If she had just gotten out of there, at least the group in Vacuo would have had some help against the sandstorm and the Grimm. But then again, it would have also severely weakened Term RWBY’s chances against Cinder and Neo… it’s a tough call, really.

- “Why didn’t you just learn your lesson?” “Oh, Penny… I did.” Okay, but that’s the thing: She really did! Just not the lesson Penny wanted her to learn. And notice how Cinder called Penny by her first name again? She didn’t use to do that. I still think somewhere down the line Penny has earned her respect.

- I wonder if Penny’s technically weaker now because she’s human (?? is she??). She’s definitely not used to fighting without her robotic parts (as you can see when she tries to reach for her swords and realizes they’re not there anymore). I summoning those swords like she then did her semblance or another maiden power?

- Blake now has to choose between helping Ruby and helping Penny and Weiss – gosh, the suspense…

- I’m glad Vine at least finally tried to stop Harriet now! (Better late than never.) But I really wouldn’t blame Qrow and Robyn for crashing into their ship. It’s not like they had any way of knowing that Vine was trying to talk sense into Harriet. Also, Qrow crashing through Harriet’s windscreen was amazing.

- Winter and Ironwood are going to fight to the death and I’m so scared of it. (I just need Winter to survive, please…)

- When Weiss described the doorway as a “one-way ticket to Vacuo” last episode, I briefly wondered if that meant they wouldn’t be let back through, but then I brushed it aside and didn’t think about it too much anymore. Oh, damn. You really do have to be very specific with Ambrosius.

- I’m not even sure which location is the best to be in right now because they all seem very unsafe: Atlas and Mantle are unsafe because Atlas is falling, because Mantle might still get blown up by Harriet, and because Salem might still come back any time. The place between worlds is unsafe because of the void and because there’s a big fight happening right there. And Vacuo is unsafe because of the Grimm and the sandstorm. So really, they’re all awful for the civilians right now.

- And now I’m thinking the volume might actually end with the protagonists split into three groups as well: Team RWBY in the void (that they’ll spend Volume 9 finding their way back from), one half of the other characters in Vacuo (Oscar, Ren, Emerald, maybe more?), and the other half still in Atlas/Mantle (Qrow, Robyn, Marrow, Winter, maybe more).

- I’m super nervous about the last episode. I haven’t seen any spoilers at all so far, and I plan to keep it that way. I’ll probably completely ignore anything RWBY-related until next week because the anxiety would kill me otherwise. I’m really worried we’ll get a character death or even several. And ironically, my first prediction on who might die this Volume (Penny, Nora, Winter, Cinder) hasn’t changed all that much. I’m worried about Penny because she has the Maiden Powers and the staff, so Cinder will come after her (but I really think it would be an awful writing choice to kill her off after we just went through so much to save her). I’m very worried about Winter because she’s engaged in a duel to the death with a man who has a big canon that he just blew someone up with. I’m worried for Cinder because of the opening and because Salem might be pissed at her for using the last question. I’m worried for everyone who’s still on Atlas and might get blown up by the bomb (Qrow, Robyn, Marrow, Winter again). And I’m very worried for the characters who are in the in-between realm. Not so much Team RWBY, but I’m worried about Nora, Jaune, and Penny. So yeah, I’m pretty much worried about everyone and very much not ready. Now let me ignore RWBY’s existence for a week – or only reblog posts I already have saved as drafts – because it’s the only way I’ll know peace.

29 notes · View notes

izzyfandoms · 4 years

Text

Through Your Ears And Mine

SHIPS: Dukemile

CHARACTERS: Remus Sanders, Emile Picani

WARNING: Remus eats something gross

GENERAL TAGLIST: @quillfics42 @aj-draws @phantomofthesanderssides @phlying-squirrel @sly-is-my-name-loving-is-my-game @because-were-fam-ily @imtryingthisout @a-creepycookie @emo-disaster @littlestr @spooky-scary-virgil @fuyel @mimsidoodles @soupgremlin @aroaceagenderfluid @birdsbookshiddeninrealbirdsskin @quirkalurk @gingers-trashy-stuff @iinyxtello @justaqueercactus @melodiread @mrbubbajones @glassferns @pun-master-logan @gayturtlez @k1ngtok1

Masterpost

A Series Of Soulmate AUs Masterpost

Remus always knew when he was about to switch hearing with his soulmate.

His ears warmed and started to tingle, and he always had a few second warning until he lost his own hearing, and started to hear through his soulmate’s ears. It always lasted at least five seconds, and never more than half a minute, though mostly somewhere in the middle, and usually didn’t give him too much information, though he enjoyed it every time.

He often heard cartoons, and he’d managed to piece together that his soulmate was a therapist through the numerous snippets of patients talking. Once, he’d heard them call his soulmate ‘doc,’ which was as close to a name or nickname as Remus had ever gotten to hearing.

Whenever he heard music, it was almost always Disney or from cartoons, which painted quite the picture of what Remus’s soulmate was like.

He seemed cute and sweet and kind, based on his taste and his choice of career, and absolutely nothing like Remus, himself.

But everyone said that opposites attracted, and Remus already knew that his soulmate was exactly his type. That was how soulmates worked, after all.

Unfortunately, Remus’s voice stopped working whenever he heard through his soulmate’s ears, which made it pretty difficult to leave a message, and the unpredictability of when it happened made it equally hard to plan ahead. He was never much of a planner, though, and was content to just let life happen to him.

They couldn’t really use their soulbond to find each other, but Remus was still happy with what it was, and listening to his soulmate was always the best part of his day.

He’d find him when he found them, and though Remus was impatient, he wasn’t the kind of person to just go out and find him himself.

When he heard the warmth and tingling in his ears, he was listening to music – it was loud and crude, just his taste, but nothing his soulmate hadn’t heard through him before, so he kept it going when the world faded out, and his soulmate’s side faded in.

“-are the Crystal Gems, we’ll always save the day!”

Ah, Steven Universe. Remus’s cousin, Patton, had teamed up with Roman to make Remus watch the show with them, so he was familiar with the theme tune. It also wasn’t the first time he’d overheard his soulmate watching it.

“And if you think we can’t, we’ll always find a way!”

Remus drummed his fingers on his knee in time to the music.

“That’s why the people of this world believe in: Garnet, Amethyst and Pearl and Steven!”

Only a moment after the theme-tune was finished, it faded out and the song Remus was listening to faded back in. It was almost over, and Remus suddenly realised how loud it was, especially in comparison to the song he’d just overheard. Hopefully his soulmate didn’t have sensitive ears.

Remus huffed, flopping back against the couch, and keeping the song at the deafening volume.

That was boring. He’d been hoping for something a little more interesting – some snippet that would tell him more about his soulmate and their life – but apparently fate had had different ideas.

Remus got up, ripping the headphones from his head and dropping them and his phone onto the couch cushions. He went over to his kitchen and decided to make the most terrible snack he could possibly think of. After a moment of consideration, tapping his foot on the kitchen floor tiles and scanning his surroundings, he decided on ketchup and mint chocolate chip ice cream.

For a second, he wondered if he should microwave the ingredients, making it more of a soup, but he decided against it as he really didn’t want to wait that long.

He mixed the two ingredients in the first bowl he could find, grabbing a spoon from the drawer and then sitting on his kitchen counter, pulling his legs up to sit cross-legged.

He ate slowly, savouring the sweet and sour mix of food that he knew would absolutely horrify everyone he’d ever met. Remus would have to text Roman about his snack lately, simply to nauseate and annoy his twin brother. It tasted good, in Remus’s opinion, but he was always one who liked peculiar flavours.

When Remus finished his snack, he dropped the bowl into the sink, alongside all of the other dishes that had been left there for days. He could clean up another time.

(He would not.)

The moment he took a step out of the kitchen, the warmth and tingling in his ears suddenly resumed.

Remus froze in place. It was uncommon for these things to happen back-to-back like this, but not completely underheard of. Once, a few years ago, it had happened twelve times in one day – twice an hour for six hours in a row – and afterwards Roman had told him that that had meant he’d been close to meeting his soulmate, but had missed the opportunity. After that, Remus had sulked for a week.

Hope began to bubble up inside of him, and Remus immediately grinned. He slumped against the wall, and prepared to listen to what he assumed was likely going to be more Steven Universe.

Instead, when his hearing faded out, and his soulmate’s faded in, he heard something else.

“Gosh, I really hope you can hear this! My friend told me to do this, said it worked for him. I recorded this on my phone, ‘cos you can’t normally hear my voice,” the voice was quick, and it took a moment for it to click in Remus’s head that this must have been his soulmate’s voice. He would’ve gasped if he could have. Instead his voice was stuck in his throat, like it always was when he heard through his soulmate’s ears. “So, um, my address is...”

There was only just enough time for the address to finish, before the sound faded out, and the silence of Remus’s apartment faded back in.

He was frozen in place, his eyes wide.

The voice was male, at least from Remus could tell, which made sense as Remus was gay, and therefore only really attracted to men. It was perfect, and already the most attractive voice Remus had ever heard in his life, and he never wanted to stop hearing it.

A minute passed, and then Remus jumped to work. He sped through his apartment, sifting through the mess of drawers – and making an even bigger mess – as he searched for a pen and a piece of paper. He went over the address again and again and again in his head as he moved, making sure not to forget it and memorizing it quickly.

When he finally found a scrap piece of paper – that had a doodle of a man being beheaded on the back – he immediately scribbled the address over the back.

He stared at it for a few seconds, clutching the paper so tightly that he almost ripped it in half.

Then, he made his mind up.

The plans he had already made for tonight, meeting up with his parents for their fortnightly dinner together, immediately slipped from his head. He had to go to this address.

He rushed over to the couch, picking up his phone and searching up the address, and his eyes lit up and his heart skipped a beat when he realised: his soulmate was close.

A two-hour long drive. Possibly less, if Remus didn’t care about breaking laws and ignoring the speed limit, which he truly did not care about.

He could go to that address right now. He could meet his soulmate today.

Remus had to. He would.

He crumpled the paper up into a ball, shoving it into his pocket along with the pen. He then rushed through his apartment like a hurricane, making an even bigger mess of the place as he searched through drawers for his car keys. For once, he was annoyed with himself at his lack of order, as he usually didn’t have much of an idea of where everything was. Normally he didn’t mind, but right now he was in enough of a hurry that he hated it.

When he finally found his keys, he turned and left his apartment.

He forgot to shut the door behind him, but it would be a while until he remembered that.

He drove faster than the speed limit when he could, but apparently fate was on his side, as he wasn’t at any point pulled over. He was halfway through his drive when the hearing switched again, and, for once in his life, Remus was responsible, and he pulled over to listen.

It was the same voice – another recorded message – and Remus’s heart skipped a beat in his chest.

It started with an awkward laugh – endearing and adorable and it made fireworks go off in Remus’s heart – and then the voice spoke again.

“Maybe I should’ve started with my number,” his soulmate said. “And my name. I got a little ahead of myself there, sorry.” Another awkward laugh. “Um... my name is Emile Picani and my number is...”

Remus grabbed the pen that he’d stuffed into his pocket and scribbled the number across the back of his right hand as it was recited. The hearing faded out, and he was left staring at his hand when the sound of the cars zooming past him faded back in.

After a moment, he dug around in his pockets for his phone, and retrieved it quickly.

He wasted no time adding the contact to his phone, and then texting it immediately.

REMUS

would it be weird for me to come to ur address right now

If Remus were any other man, he would have realised how weird of an opening that was. However, he was not any other man, he was Remus, and that was the best he could come up with.

He didn’t have to wait long for a reply.

EMILE

Umm....

I guess that depends on who you are!

Remus could practically hear that sweet, awkward laugh in his head, and he couldn’t wait for the next time he’d get to hear it in his ears again. Hopefully, that next time would happen face-to-face.

REMUS

soulmate

ur voice is pretty

Remus drummed his fingers on his knee as he waited impatiently for the next text. It only took a couple minutes for the next text to come.

EMILE

Oh my gosh!!! Wow!!!!!

So it worked?

My brother told me it would but i was so nervous!

It worked for him and his soulmate but i wasn’t sure it would for us!!!!

All bonds are different right?

REMUS

it worked

can i come then?

EMILE

Gosh okay!!

I don’t have work today and it would be jut wonderful to finally meet you!!!

*just

As long as it doesn’t inconvenience you of course

REMUS

Im already close

And he was. A quick glance at his GPS made it known that he was already only an hour away. Just an away from his soulmate’s place, and from finally meeting his soulmate himself.

Remus was ecstatic.

He stuffed his phone into his pocket and restarted his drive.

Again, he drove over the speed limit, but, again, it seemed that fate was on his side, and he wasn’t caught and pulled over.

He got a few complaints from pedestrians when he sloppily parked just down the street from his soulmate’s apartment building, and one even kicked his tire. He ignored them all without hesitation, though, and only just remembered to lock his car behind him as he raced down the street: not quite running, but certainly hurrying.

He passed pedestrians that he paid no mind, darting through the crowd, and then stopped in his tracks when he passed a small stall selling flowers.

Remus paused, his mind moving a mile a minute, before he bought the first bouquet that caught his eye – it was rainbow: a bright, mixture of colours that Remus hoped his soulmate would like.

He wasn’t usually the nice, romantic type, but even Remus wanted to make a good first impression.

It didn’t take long for him to get inside the apartment building – one of the tenants opened the door just before him, and kept holding it open for Remus when they saw him following behind.

He climbed the stairs – he figured running up them was better than taking the elevator, and risking having to stop at every floor. It didn’t take long for him to find his soulmate’s apartment; he checked the address once on the way, and, though his hand-writing was messy and unreadable to most, he knew he was in the right place.

Remus stopped at the door, and knocked loudly.

But before just before it could open, the familiar warmth and tingling of his ears returned, and the moment the door swung open, he still heard it, but through the ears of the man now in front of him, instead of his own.

The man in front of him – his soulmate, his soulmate – was cute. Very, very cute. He had curly hair and wide eyes, and clothes that were pink and beige and neat and clean, as opposed to Remus’s, which were always ripped and messy.

They stared at each other, as they could not yet talk.

Emile’s eyes kept flicking between Remus’s face and the bouquet, and it was only when their hearing switched back that he remembered to hand the flowers to his soulmate.

He held them out, and Emile took them and held them to his chest.

“Thank you.”

#me #writing #dukemile #intrumile #remani #sanders sides #cartoon therapy #emile picani #remus sanders #sympathetic remus #soulmate au #human au #fluff

92 notes · View notes

nightfayre · 3 years

Note

hi!!!! Love everything that u do!! Have read all ur fics hehe. Whos ur fav of the four boys? And has ur fav always remained the same?

oh!! thank you so much!! that’s so sweet!! thank you for supporting me <33

gosh, I knew this question would come one day, haha! if I’m being honest, jian yi used to be my favorite (hence my icon, which I don’t plan to change any time soon lol). I was hooked on him after I read the chapter where he was running in the rain after he kissed zhengxi -- a lifetime ago LMAO. and also the chapters/arc when he had to decide what to do with the girl’s love letter addressed to zhengxi. and I didn’t necessarily like jian yi because of his relationship with zhengxi, if that makes sense? I liked his quirky, unpredictable personality that has a lot more depth to it than seen at first blush. and I still do! jian yi holds a special place in my heart and always will. buuut....

guan shan has since stolen my heart. you could’ve probably guessed that, since most of my fics are written from his perspective haha. again, I like how guan shan’s outward personality is so different from what really goes on in his heart. he’s incredibly complex and kind and hurting. and when we get glimpses of his vulnerabilities, it’s literally one of the best feelings in the world. like, he’s so lowkey but also not? so obvious in some ways but so guarded in others?

and, despite popular belief, he tian isn’t the only person/thing that allows us to see guan shan’s true character. I often think back to that tiny, forgettable scene where guan shan saw a dog sleeping on the side of the road and told it to scram so it didn’t get hurt. and also when he stood up to she li for his friend despite knowing the consequences (when his ears got pierced). it’s just... yeah. lmao. in summary, I love him your honor. I could talk for hours about this topic but this response has already got ridiculously long and I don’t want to clog people’s dashes more than I already have today! but basically tdlr is jian yi was the OG but guan shan is now the highlight of my life.

#19 days #good lord why do I always do this #people ask me 'how was your day?' and I go on a sixteen page rant #anyway #thank you for the question though!!#anonymous #mailbox

21 notes · View notes

justoneday-namjoonii · 4 years

Text

Quarters. | 8

☼1 • 2 • 3 • 4 • 5 • 6 • 7 • 8

prompt: Sitting here, patching myself up. Crying over what's left, 'cause without you I ain't shit, but no pressure guess I gotta learn my lesson. Sorry — 6LACK

pairing: Jungkook x reader

warnings/au: dysfunctional relationship with a capital D, family drama, humor(i try), temptations, drug usage, relapsing, hoeing, mentions and accusations of infidelity, jk has baby-fever for two seconds if you squint,, bloody, 18+ for heavy scenes, fluff, angst, this is purely fiction please do not read if you are sensitive or easily triggered boxer!au, iceskater!au.

authors note: omg FINALLY💜🐰 this chapter really took everything I had lol, like always, this part is a little out there, their relationship gets tested and they’re forced to grow. Will edit later. enjoy!

It’s so early in the morning, the sun is just now rising—the beauty does nothing for your anxiety though.

You told Jungkook that he needs to rest, he needs to take it easy and clear his mind before he walks into that hospital. The last thing you need is a stressed Jungkook behind the wheel, he’s way too unpredictable when he’s upset. After a few minutes of going back and forth, he gave up and let you drive him—in his car. This is a privilege. He doesn’t let anyone drive his car, not his best friends, not even you. He says, no one knows how to handle her like I do.

It always makes you laugh when he says that.

Jungkook glances at you as you take a turn at a questionable speed. He’s definitely driving back home.

You look around the crowded parking lot and pull into a visitor's parking space, squeezing between the white lines surprisingly well.

“That was a long drive,” You pull the key out of the ignition and turn your head to look at him, “but we made it.”

Jungkook doesn’t turn to look at you, rather, he takes a deep breath and his eyes shut before he drags his hands down his face. “I’m gonna warn you now, I’m going off on him if he gives me some shit excuse as to why he decided to leave me out of the loop on this.”

“Jungkook, please don’t do that. Stay calm, for your mother's sake and mine, I’m nervous.” You sigh, trying to grasp the fact that you’re about to meet his family for the first time. You open your door and slide out, naturally, you assumed he was doing the same thing. When you drop the keys into your purse and close the door, he still in the passenger's seat, head in his hands.

“Jungkook.” You stomp around the vehicle and open his door. “Come on, we need to go inside,”

He sighs, heavy black boots landing on the pavement when he gets out of the car, stretching his legs in the hugging black jeans. When he closes the door, he bends down to look at himself in the window, hair still a little wet.

“You look good with messy hair, don’t fix it too much,” You smile, trying to lighten the mood, he smiles a little but he’s back to that grave face in just a few seconds. His silver necklace is a nice touch to his outfit you notice, he paired it with his hooped earrings and you think it looks really charming.

You haven’t been to a hospital in a while. Nurses with bright colored scrubs come to and from the nurse's station, visitors pace around the gift shop, hoping to find the perfect for their loved one. When you two get signed in as visitors, your eyes wander to the couple at the sliding doors, the woman is in a wheelchair holding her baby and the man is trying to help in any way possible, the nurse gazes at him fondly. She knows he’s trying hard.

“Here you go, she’s in room 202A,” The nurse hands you the sticky tags to and points you in the right direction. Jungkook breathes in, looking like the antiseptic and sterile environment makes him dizzy.

“Should I get her a gift?” Your eyes follow the family walking out of the gift shop with get well balloons and teddy bears.

“You can, she’d like that,” He follows you into the gift shop and you go straight to the bunnies in the corner. After sorting through the stuffed animals, you pick the little pink one in the back. Now that you see the bunny, it’s only right to get her a balloon and some flowers.

“Hi there,” She cashier greets you, taking your items to ring them up, “great choices.”

“Thanks,” You smile, proud that this random lady approves of your gifts.

It’s not long before you’re leaving the shop to finally meet see her, to finally meet his family. Does Jungkook have her eyes? The cute sun rays at the corner of his eyes when he laughs, does he get that from her? These questions swarm your mind when Jungkook's hand grips the doorknob, just seconds away from opening another part of his world to you.

“Knock, knock,” He opens the door and the brightest smile came to his face when he sees the woman on the bed. He beckons you to follow and you just know you must have the most awkward smile on your face.

“Jungkook! Oh my gosh, I didn’t know you were coming!”

She looks at him like he’s a puppy – as if he’s the epitome of love and innocence.

He runs to give her a hug, eyes squeezing shut, relieved that she’s in one piece and smiling that life-saving smile. “I’m glad you’re okay mom,” He sighs, standing back and reaching for you to shuffle you towards his mother, “this is Y/n, my girlfriend.”

“Hi, it’s nice to meet you,” You smile, holding your gifts out to her, “this is for you, I hope you like it.”

“Aw, thank you, honey,” She takes the bunny with bright eyes and you sit the flowers on the stand beside her bed, “I’m so glad he brought you to meet me. I hate that we’re meeting under these circumstances though.”

“Jooe called me last night, scared me half to death,” Jungkook takes a seat in the recliner beside her and you sit in the little cushioned bench near the window, “are you okay?”

“I’m as good as can be expected, I guess,” She continues to talk to Jungkook and just observe them, admiring their similarities—you note that she looks very young, “I felt terrible yesterday. The doctors told me that I got here right on time, the appendix was badly ruptured, it felt like cramps from hell.”

“Where’s Kev and Jooe?” Jungkook says her husband's name differently than his little sisters.

“She was getting restless, he took her to get something from the cafeteria. Something tells me you’re not too happy with him, and my intuition never lies so what’s the problem?”

“Mom, I got the call that you were in the hospital from Jooe. Why didn’t he call me? Why does she have a phone, by the way? She’s 6.”

“I know, she told me.” She lets out a sigh, knowing where Jungkook is going. “It’s an emergency cellphone app on her tablet, it’s not an actual phone.”

He dismisses the information to return to his original topic. “I shouldn’t have gotten a call that you were in the hospital from her. Kev, your husband, should have let me know.”

“Jungkook, he was stressed out, okay? He was trying to make sure I was okay so his attention was a little divided, don’t be too hard on him.”

“He did it on purpose, he’s always tried to keep me out of the loop when it comes to you. I’m fucking tired of it-”

“Kookie!”

A high-pitched voice squeals from an adorable little girl with two long jet-black pigtails atop her head. She runs from the man once holding her hand to jump into Jungkook’s arms. It’s evident in his mother's eyes that her heart is melting at the sight.

“It’s good to see you too, Jooe,” He giggles, pulling back to get a good look at her, “Hey, I want you to meet someone.”

You squirm anxiously, for some reason wanting her more than anyone else approval.

“She’s really special to me,” When she adjusts to sit in his lap, she finally looks at you. He leans to whisper in her ear, “say hi.” He moves her to fully face you, making both of your eyes go wide at meeting each other.

“Hi,” She shyly waves, back leaning into Jungkook to seek comfort.

“Hi, I’m Y/n,” You wave, “you’re so pretty, you look just like your mom.”

She blushes, hands grabbing at her yellow sun-dress instinctively. “Thank you, you’re really pretty too.” She cracks a bright smile and her attention goes to her mother when she starts asking her about what she ate for breakfast.

“Jungkook, I didn’t think you’d be able to make it,” Kev finally speaks and the sparkle in Jungkook’s eyes fades instantly.

“Well, here I am.” Jungkook shoots back, eyes menacing and dark within a matter of seconds.

“Um, hello,” You stand up to greet who you assume if ‘Kev,’ hand extended and he takes it in a friendly manner, “I’m Y/n, you’re Kevin, right? It’s nice to meet you, I’m Jungkook’s-”

“You must be his better half,” You nod, scooting back to sit down, “a pleasure to meet you, sweetheart.”

A million-dollar pearly smile, business clothes on, hair slicked back like that of a TV-doctors—he seems really kind, you can’t see why Jungkook would have such a problem with him. It’s hard to sit here knowing he’s the reason Jungkook wasn’t invited to his step-brother's wedding. The reason he called you drunk as hell because he was so hurt—this guy did that to him.

“Has the doctor been in to talk to you? I have a call to jump on but I want to be with you to see what she says.”

“Don’t worry about it, honey, take your call, I know you’re pressed for time,” She sighs in relief, “I’m just glad Jungkook is here, I feel better just from seeing his face,” She reaches for his hand and a spark of pride comes to him, “it’s been too long.”

He knows and guilt eats him up for that more than she knows.

“Well, you know Jungkook, he’s got a busy life, doesn't have too much time for stuff like this,” He laughs a little, eyes landing on you for a moment, “I’m sure you get that, don’t you hon?”

He’s looking at you and you turn a little pale. You look at Jungkook, and then open your mouth to utter out something, “Well, um, no I-...”

“Kev, leave the girl alone,” Jungkook’s mom intervenes, noticing how flustered you looked.

“I can’t make time for shit that I don’t even know is happening,” Now it’s Jungkook’s turn to laugh, but not out of genuine amusement, he’s doing it to stay calm, “What do you expect? You don’t tell me shit.”

“All you have to do it ask,” Kevin stands next to his wife, opening up his phone to absentmindedly tap the screen.

“That’s bullshit...” Jungkook let one too many words slip before thinking of the child in his lap who’s more focused on his phone than anything. The two of them make you feel uneasy, it’s like one wrong word from either of them would start a brawl.

“No!” Jooe exclaims, sliding off of Jungkook’s lap, “I left my sweater in the cafeteria! I have to go get it before someone takes it!” Distress befalls her and now the whole room's attention is on her.

“Jooe, I told you to make sure you kept it wrapped around your waist,” Kev doesn’t look like he wants to go but he grudgingly stands to his feet. “Come on,”

“Do you want me to take her? I was going to get coffee anyway, I can help her look for it.” You look at Jooe with a sweet smile.

“Oh, are you sure? I mean, as long as you don’t mind I fine with it,” It’s almost like you answered his prayer because he fell back into a chair with a sigh of relief.

“Of course I don’t mind,” You stand up, holding out your hand, “is it okay if I go with you, Jooe?” She nods, taking your hand without hesitation. Jungkook looks in awe as you seem to already be a favorite of his little sisters—he’s never seen you interact with children, but it warms his heart.

“We’ll be back everyone,”

You wave to the room as you go on a mission to find the missing sweater. As soon as the door closed, Jungkook’s mom smirks at him.

“What? You’re giving me a weird look.”

“She’s so sweet Jungkook, oh my gosh. I’m so glad you brought her, I’ve never met one of your girlfriends before, she must really be something. Look, Kev,” She points to the flowers and the bunny in bed next to her, “she brought me these cute gifts.”

“That’s sweet,” He looks up from his phone, then at Jungkook, “you better hang on to her.”

“That’s what I’m doing,” Jungkook scoffs. “So all l I have to do is ask, you expect me to have to beg for information on my own mother?”

“We live in different city’s and sometimes it’s easy to handle things and let you know after everything's said and done.” He reasons, eyes going to his cellphone in an attempt to exit the conversation peacefully. To both his mother and Kev’s surprise, he leaves it at that—not cussing, not lashing out, he just sinks back into his seat, expression unreadable. Jungkook remembered that you asked him not to lash out, and he’s so tempted to, but he’s gotta keep things under control for you.

You must have made a difference in him because this isn’t the Jungkook they’re used to.

* * *

“What color is it, Jooe?”

You and this bubbly little girl are holding hands and walking into the cafeteria. “Sky blue, it’s my favorite, what if someone took it...” concern coats her tone, it makes you a thousand times more determined to find it.

“Don’t worry, we’ll find it, you’re with a professional sweater detective Jooe,” You give her hand a reassuring squeeze and draw a little smile from her. It only takes a few questions to get her to retrace her steps. She finally finds the table she sat at while her dad ordered her fold and it was right there. It’s just a sweater, but she’s so happy.

”I told you we’d find it,” You’re relieved she found it, now you can get your coffee, “I’m just gonna get some coffee, then we can go back up to the room.” You lead her to stand by you when you walk up to the counter. A protective arm around her shoulders as you order two small lattes. They come out quickly and she begs you to carry Jungkook’s, you’re afraid she’ll drop it, but you give her a chance.

“Okay, but be careful,” She walks right beside you, both hands tight on the disposable cup, you open the door for her to walk in and she beams.

“We found it,” She walks up to Jungkook, handing him the cup, “and we brought you coffee.”

“Thank you guys,” He looks up at you, his eyes sparkling.

“I’ll be right back, I have to make a phone call,” You look to Jungkook to reassure him that everything is okay. But you got a text from your older sister Layla. Call me. She rarely reached out like this so you decided to give her a call, hoping nothing was wrong

“Hello,”

“Hey, Y/n, how are you?”

“I’m fine, what’s wrong? You texted me to call, what’s going on?”

She sighs, “I need a favor,”

“What is it?”

“I need someone to watch Lily, I’m in your part of town and I have to go see her dad.”

“Layla,” You message your temples, “I’m not in town and I don’t know if I can watch a baby right now, I’m with my b-”

“Please Y/n, I can’t call mom, you know how she is with him,”

“Okay, okay,” You cut her off, looking down at your watch to see if you can make it home before 11, “I can get home around 11, bring her by 11:30.”

“Thank you! Thank you, I’ll see you then little sis,” She sounds relieved, and even though this wasn’t apart of your plans, you do feel good about helping her out. You type up a quick message to tell Jungkook that your visit has to be cut short. Hoping he sees it, you walk back into the room and give his family a kind smile.

“I’m sorry to cut the visit short, but I have a little situation that came up with my sister’s baby, so I’m gonna have to go,” Jungkook stands up, sitting Jooe where he once sat with her tablet and promptly kissing her forehead and telling her he’ll see her soon.

“Oh, we understand Y/n, I’m just glad I was able to meet you,” His mom reaches to give you a hug goodbye, she whispers, “take care of him for me.”

“I will,” You notice that Kev had stepped out so you weren’t able to say goodbye to him, and you have a feeling Jungkook is glad.

“I love you mom, call me if anything changes,” His mom kisses his cheek, relishing in the rare affection she gets to show her son.

His family loves him.

When you get to the car, you can see relief overtake his body, knowing his mother is in good health. This time he drives, and now he gets to assist you with your family situation.

“So, what’s up with your sister?”

“She needs me to watch her baby,” You lean against the window, pressing your temples, “she’s having baby-daddy issues, but she won’t say it,”

“Hm,” He nods, knowing how that can be according to some of his friends, “how old is the baby?”

“She’s five months or six months old, something like that, I was supposed to go out to help Rosie pack for her new apartment but I guess I’ll have to get there later,” and you were really looking forward to that.

“Oh, she’s a young baby,”

You can’t help but giggle, “Aren’t they all,”

“Yeah, but I mean like, she still needs her mothers milk and she probably is just- I don’t know, small?” In the midst of him explaining the difference between a baby and a young-baby, your eyes flutter shut and you fall straight to sleep. The gentle hum of the engine lulled you to sleep. When he looked over, a grin came to his face—even thought you fell asleep in the middle of his talking, he loves you.

For some reason, you’re stressed.

“Jungkook, you don’t have to stay,” You told him that a hundred times, telling him he was supposed to be conditioning today but he insisted, “I got this.”

“I don’t have to go until late,” He’s laying on your couch, a black tee-shirt on, showing his beautiful arms and the tattoos that graced them. He’s drawing one for one of Yoongi’s clients tonight. Yoongi has his own tattoo shop, where it smells like weed and you’re sure drug deals happen in the back. You want to go lay with him, but instead, you're in the kitchen trying to clean your stress away on the stainless steel. “I’ll stay for a while, you went with me this morning,”

“Just know that you don’t have to,” You mumble, that’s when you hear the doorbell ring, “she’s here.” When you yank the gloves off, you go to the door and take a breath before opening it.

“Hi, Y/n,” Layla walks right in, giving you a big hug.

“Hey,” You smile, eyes filling with adoration when you see your niece in the car seat, “hi Lily,” You lead Layla to sit the car seat on the couch where Jungkook was waiting to be introduced.

“Layla, Jungkook,” You gesture to him, “Jungkook, Layla.”

“Hi,” He flashes a sweet smile, “nice to meet you.”

“Oh hello, nice to meet you too, “ She nudges your arm, giving you gossiping-girlfriend eyes. “Y/n didn’t tell me you were so handsome,”

“Yeah, well, must’ve slipped my mind,” You laugh, the most in-genuine laugh he’s ever heard, “did you bring her a few changes of clothes? Bottles? Formula?”

“Are you her mom, or am I?” She laughs, handing you the baby bag. “Everything’s in there, she should be hungry in a few minutes.”

“Okay, will you be back to get here tonight? I have plans tonight so-”

“Yeah, before 7,” She’s headed to the front door, “thanks so much for watching her.”

The door closes, and just as quick, Lily starts to cry.

“She’s crying,” Jungkook moves closer to her pink car seat, hesitantly moving her seat to look at her increasingly red face. “do you want me to-”

You rush over to pick her up, “It’s okay Lily,” cradling her against you, “Auntie Y/n is watching you while mommy takes care of some business,” You walk around, rocking her a little, then you remember she’s probably just hungry. His eyes are wide, watching you hold the little girl to cry to calm her

“Jungkook,” He shakes out of his daze and looks at you, “can you warm her a bottle? Just run it under hot water for a minute or so,” You point to the baby bag and take a seat on the couch. He gets up promptly, finding the bottle easily and taking it to the kitchen.

He dries the bottle and brings it to you, “Thanks,” You sit her up, her curly brown hair a little smashed on one side but still cute. When you bring it to her lips, her crying ceases and you breathe in relief, Jungkook sits beside you, leaning on your shoulder and watching the TV.

“Hopefully she’ll nap after this,” Her big brown eyes look from you to Jungkook every few seconds, “look at her hair, it’s so curly,”

“Yeah, it is,” He smiles, looking down at your niece, “she’s adorable,”

It’s not long before she finishes her bottle, you burp her and put her back in the seat so she can nap. Surprisingly, she doesn’t fuss, and you leave her and Jungkook on the couch so you can go to the table to finish the essay that you forgot you had.

He’s awoken by a cry. In his many years with Jooe when she was a baby, he often woke up to cries. He groggily opens his eyes and shoots up to see what was wrong with Lily and to see where you went.

“Hey,” He reaches down the lift her small body into his completely contrasting hands, “it’s okay, don’t cry, shh,” Naturally, he bounces her gently, feeling bad for her inability to express her sorrow, “what’s wrong Lily-” That’s when it hits him, “Oh,” He sighs, “I would cry too.”

With her in one arm, he grabs her baby bag, dragging it across the couch. Once he finds the changing mat, he lays it out and lays her on it. He doesn’t think he’s ever seen a baby turn so red, she looks like she’ll set the house on fire if he doesn’t hurry up.

“I know, I’m sorry,” He takes out the diapers, wipes, and gloves, “I haven’t changed a baby in years, give me a break,”

After dodging her kicks to his hands and relieving her of the dirty diaper, she’s cleaned up and the color is coming back to her face.

“Damn,” He triple-bags the diaper and gloves and takes it to the trash with her in his other arm, “I think I did a pretty good job, what do you think?” He smiles, proud of himself for being an ideal babysitter in his eyes, even though she’s still crying a little bit.

“Where is your aunt?” He drops the bag in the trash and then looks around for you. When he finds you, your head is on your textbook and your computer screen was black, you fell asleep doing work. He’s found you like this many times after skate practice, cramming for assignments that you procrastinated on.

“Let’s let her sleep for a little bit,” Resisting the urge to wake you, opting for taking Lily to the couch so she could chill in her seat. He turns on his game counsel that he left over here and makes himself busy.

Lily was quiet for the most part after he gave her a pacifier and she found a dangling thing on her seat—she’s good now.

Suddenly, you feel paper stick to your face and your eyes fluttered open.

“Jungkook?” You shoot up, wiping your face and looking around. “How long was I asleep?” You quickly walk over to the living room, looking at your boyfriend and your niece having a fine time without you.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep,” You sigh, taking a seat between Jungkook and Lily in her seat, “I was trying to write my paper.”

“You’re fine, I changed her and everything,” His eyes are still glued to the TV and you grin.

“Wow, thanks. You’re a good babysitter,” You sigh, dropping your hand into her seat and she grabs one of your fingers, “I guess I should order some takeout, what do you want? Pizza?”

“I wish I could stay baby,” He leans back and sighs, “but I gotta go, Yoongi’s expecting me at the shop, he wants me to finish up a sketch for a client of his.”

“Oh, then I’ll just make something for me,” Your eyes follow him as he gets up, grabbing his keys and scrolling through his phone for a moment, “hopefully Layla will pick her up on time so I can head to Rosie’s,”

“Yeah,” He gently rubs Lily’s little cheek, his hair dangle over her when he leans down to smile at her, “bye Lily, be good for your aunt, okay?”

You giggle. “I didn’t know you were such a softy for babies,”

“She’s cute, kinda makes me want one,” Your expression must’ve looked shocked because he quickly covered himself, “I’m joking, I’m not daddy-material, I can babysit, but my own kid? I don’t think so, we’re both a little too messed up for that,” He just laughs.

“Yeah,” You nervously let out the breath that you unconsciously held. He can’t blame you for your reaction, you’re both young with lives that just don’t work well with stability. And you love Jungkook and he loves you, but jokes like that are merely just that, jokes.

“I’ll see you later,” He leans down to give you a kiss, pressing your lips with a grin.

“Okay,” You withdraw, your smile fading a little but he doesn’t notice. When he leaves, your eyes linger on the door and you swallow.

You have an aversion to a lot of places he goes, but you have a special dislike for Yoongi’s tattoo shop.

“Lily,” You look at her and sigh, “I guess it’s just you and me.” You switch on some random TV show and sit back, you just hope her mom isn’t late this time.

When he pulls up to the shop, his usual parking space in the back being there just as he expected, he sees Yoongi talking to some girl at the back door. She’s a frail little thing, hair bleached as white at humanly possible, mascara heavy even from this distance, and tattoos covering her legs under fishnet-stockings and very short shorts. He watches as Yoongi talks to her, he looks upset, brows furrowed even under his hair covering them.

Her eyes are dark and whatever she’s saying is making Yoongi place his hands over his face. She looks like she might be defending herself. After a few seconds, she shows him her middle finger and storms to her car. Pulling out at an ungodly speed. He kindly flips her off and eyes her until she’s out of sight, that’s Yoongi.

Jungkook finally decides to get out of the car and Yoongi leans against the back door, waiting for him to walk over.

“Hyung,” He grabs his art bag and locks his car, letting it beep twice before leaving it, “sorry I’m a little late,”

“You’re fine,” Yoongi sighs, tired eyes gaining a little bit of life when he sees Jungkook, “I’m sure you saw the shit I just had to deal with.” Yoongi opens the door so they can both head inside the well-kept shop, the door shutting behind them.

“I wasn’t gonna mention it,” But he was admittedly curious, “but who was that,”

“A pain in the ass,” An artist he hired about a month ago, she’s got talent but she’s a complete mess, “she was selling dope out of the shop, drawing junkies back here at all times of the day. I’m not letting her fuck up my business, I had to fire her.”

“That’s tough,” Jungkook nods, clearing his throat when he takes a seat at his normal spot in Yoongi’s backroom slash office. “So, the sketch is rough, I’ll refine it and you can tell me if you want to add anything. Who is it for again?”

“Agh,” Yoongi groans, now deciding to reveal the truth, “I was going to keep it a secret until the last second, but I guess I’ll tell you.”

Jungkook furrows a brow, “Tell me what?”

“It’s for Jimin, he wanted a new tattoo but he wanted the design to be a surprise,” Yoongi shows Jungkook to the area he can sketch at while Yoongi cleans up his needles and wipes off the table, “I told him I’d have it drawn up by my best artist,” He looks at Jungkook, “that’s you.”

“Seriously? In that case, I know exactly how I should finish it, he told me of a tattoo he was looking at not too long ago,” Jungkook smiles, glad he knows the person who’s going to have this tattoo, “it’s small, I imagined it going on the biceps or the ribs maybe? Not sure yet,” He sets up his tools to start finishing the design.

The shop is bustling with clients, artists, like always. Yoongi pretty popular with the underground scene, the punks and rejects seem to gravitate to this place. Including himself. He pops in his earbuds because of the loud conversations going on in the front.

Without him noticing at first, Yoongi slips out the back door.

After an hour or so, Mingyu, one of the artists walks in and Jungkook takes out an earbud to greet him. He’s got more tattoos than Jungkook and his hair is electric blue and he used to drag Jungkook into all types of stupid stuff. He’s been close to puking out his organs on several occasions—they laughed a lot about it but he never smoked with him after that.

“Kook, long time no see,” He leans in the door frame, “I saw you at the match last night, you’re always the talk of the night on Tuesday Night Brawls, congrats on your win.”

“Thanks,” Jungkook pushes his hair back, propping his arm on the desk to look at him, “I didn’t see you,”

“I had some activities to attend to so I had to leave early,” Mingyu’s activities probably entailed a female going to who knows where to do who knows what, “I heard you went to Jimin’s for a little party, any fun stories? I didn’t see many groupies with you guys,”

“Man, I don’t do that shit anymore,” Jungkook goes back to the drawing, “I’m kind of in a relationship,”

“Oh, me too,” He giggles to himself, “but we like to keep it open, it’s not exclusive, ”

“Mine is,” Jungkook affirms, this bias towards one individual catching Mingyu off guard.

“Aw, someones softened up,” Mingyu nods, “then I guess you probably don’t want to go to Milo’s Club, I have a friend there who’ll hook us up if you know what I mean.”

Milo’s is the spot for avid clubbers of any rank, potheads, college kids—anyone and everyone looking for a good time.

“Ah, I don’t know,” Jungkook shrugs, “maybe,”

“Well, some of us are headed over there when we close up shop in about 30 minutes, if you change your mind feel free to join us,”

Tempting.

Going out wouldn’t hurt, you’ll be at your girlfriend's house so he’d be going home alone anyway, he reasons with himself. As long as he doesn’t get carried away, he can indulge a little bit, can’t he? Yeah, he was just going out like he used to, nothing bad about that.

Layla finally came to get Lily and just as soon as she came you went to the grocery store to get a dessert to bring, you were feeling a little peckish. When you knock on the door, you can hear Rosie’s footsteps approach the door.

“Hey girl,” Rosie smiles, pulling you in with a relieved sigh, “oh, you brought food?” She peaks into the bag that you take to the kitchen.

“Yup, cheesecake,” You walk into the apartment and see Yuna, and Harmony here to help as well, “thought it’d be nice to have something indulgent.”

“Thank you Y/n,” Yuna speaks up from her wrapping a vase in bubble-wrap, “Rosie is working us to death, we need a reward.”

“I’m sure she is,” You laugh at Rosie defending herself as you open the cheesecake and take out paper plates and forks, “sorry I’m a little late, I was babysitting for a little bit.”

“Aw,” Harmony speaks from her comfortable spot sprawled on the couch, “who’s baby?”

“My sister’s, she needed to meet with her boyfriend, they had to sort some stuff out,” You put generous portions on each plate and brought them with you to the living room, “he’s being stupid.”

“That sucks,” Rosie looks u from her cheesecake, “is it custody thing?”

“I don’t even know, she won’t say,” You find yourself scooping a piece of cheesecake into your mouth, “Oh, I also met Jungkook’s family this morning.”

“How did that go?”

“It was fine,” You sigh, “his little sister called him last night, told him their mom’s appendix had ruptured, and you know him he got super worried and I did too. He doesn’t have a good relationship with his stepdad, they don’t see eye-to-eye on anything. But I think it went okay, his mom and his little sister seemed to like me, the stepdad too.”

“That’s good, I know you were worried about him letting you in on his family life,”

“Yeah, he even helped me babysit for a little while,” You smile at the thought, “it was really cute.”

“Oh my gosh,” Yuna giggles, “tattooed, earrings, leather boots, and ripped jeans Jungkook with a baby? How cute,” Everyone makes a mental picture of it and their hearts melt, “he seems like the type now that I think about it.”

“I fell asleep and when I woke up, he had changed her and they were on the couch together,” You smile at the thought, “it was sweet. He was talking about how cute she was, he said she made him want one.”

“You’re lucky,” Harmony looks up from her phone, “my ex couldn’t take care of a cactus, let alone a baby.”

“It’s silly, but there’s this thing I have where-...Well, you guys know the stuff I went through with my birth mom, she was a mess. And when she tried to get me back when I was in elementary school, it was a nightmare. Jungkook didn’t have it easy growing up either, it just makes sense that he’d say we’re both too messed up for a kid,” You sigh, “we’re both scarred by our parents. But I still don’t know why he’d say that...”

The three of them give you an odd look, “Say what? That you’re both too messed up for a kid?”

“Yeah,” You frown “why would he say he wanted on if that’s how he felt about us?”

“He was just being funny and obviously flirting with you,” Rosie shakes her head, “most girls would find that charming,”

“He said he was joking,” You reveal, “but damn, I’m not that messed up...”

“You mean you two have never talked about kids before, not even out of fun as a couple?”

“Well,” You rub your arm, embarrassed that they all think your reaction is ridiculous, “no...Is that a normal thing?”

You’re being ridiculous—is that what they all thought?

“Uh, yeah, Y/n,” Yuna takes everyone's empty plates to the kitchen, “chill, he was just being a guy. Maybe you can talk to him about it-”

“No, it’s not that deep,” You reason, “he went to Yoongi’s shop tonight, where all his up-to-no-good friends are...The people there do a lot of crazy stuff, there’s always some drama. That’s what I hear at least, I’ve never even been there.”

“Yeah,” Rosie chimes in, “but You trust Jungkook,” you assumed it was a question so you nod, “so chill out, and wrap these spatulas. I have to get half of this done before I pick my parents up from the airport in the morning, my mom will go neat-freak if she’s the one helping me.” She laughs, handing you the rags to wrap it in.

You should trust him.

So why don’t you?

The music is so loud, it almost hurts—but it’s so familiar, he knows the blaring speakers well. All the smells, the people wearing close to nothing just to get a fleeting moment of attention. He was once a happy giver of that attention. Hell, it was happily given to him at one point. As soon as they walked in, Mingyu was whisked away by a beautiful girl and he dragged Jungkook with him.

“Aren’t you glad you joined us?”

Mingyu simpers, throwing back his second shot before his lips were pulled to the girl's mouth. Her lips were so pink, they were big too and he wondered if they were real. Jungkook just watched, his shot still untouched until he felt the need to down it like his life depended on it and walk-off. The other guys who decided to join were off at the bar and Yoongi went off to a personal room.

Jungkook was standing up against a corner, arms crossed and eyes surveying the room. Unbeknownst to him, there was a girl watching him from the dance floor. She was wearing a skin-tight sequin-covered dress that the lights hit, her eyes were set on a target and she was planning her attack.

After a few minutes, Mingyu signals Jungkook to follow him into one of the personal rooms, where the magic happens. The purple lights from the ceiling illuminate the room in the dreamiest ways, the leather booths surrounding the room are shiny and comfortable when they sit.

“San,” Mingyu greets him, taking a seat with that girl still under his arm, “what’d you have for me tonight?”

“The usual. I didn’t know you were bringing a friend,” He looks at Jungkook, surprised to see him here without Jimin, “good to see you, Jungkook. What’ll you be having?”

“Depends,” Jungkook takes a seat across from Mingyu, “I might pass.”

“Oh, come on,” Mingyu removes his hand from the girl's thigh to grab his wallet, tossing him a joint and a lighter, “here, take this and then see how you feel. As for me, San, I’ll take the usual, one for my lady-friend too.”

Jungkook stares down at the thing in his lap, taking it in his hand and using his other to light it. This is harmless, he mentally counsels himself with a deep inhale and slow exhale.

It’s not long before his head is floating and his body is slowly dissipating into thin air. His eyes are half-lidded and he feels good, relaxed, but deep inside there’s a quiet longing—he pushes it down in favor of another puff. Through blurred eyes, he watches Mingyu and the girl take something, he doesn’t know what.

“Now, you know what you want?” San speaks up, standing as if he just came back from somewhere. “It’s on the house, call it a favor for an old friend.”

Jungkook laughs a little bit, seeing that he’s already feeling like he did in high school, sneaking off into clubs to do this. “Give me something mild, I can’t go too crazy,”

“I know just the thing,” While San is going through a case, Jungkook is leaning on his knees, watching to make sure whatever he’s about to take isn’t some heavy-hitter kind of stuff. He pops the pill and sits back to let it take full effect. 30 minutes until euphoria, that’s what he used to say in his mind before consuming this stuff because that’s how long it normally took for hin to really feel it.

Mingyu whispers something to the girl, she tugs down her dress and scurries out of the room with a giddy smile.

He’s teetering on the edge. So close, too close. The joint he had is still sending vapors in the air from the ashtray, he picks it up and finishes it.

Warm, and a little dazed, his eyes follow Mingyu who’s giving San a wad of cash before the drug dealer runs off. Mingyu’s little friend came back but Jungkook doesn’t register the people she brought with her, he’s high in the clouds right now while scrolling through his phone, wondering what you’re doing. Something smells really good all of a sudden, like flowers soaked in spices. He looks up from the phone and there’s a woman standing in front of him, he furrows his brows.

“Hi,” She’s standing in front of him, that same girl with the sequin dress and long brown hair, “I’m Kendall, you’re Jungkook right?”

“Yeah,” He stares her down and she takes a seat next to him.

“I hear you’re a boxer,” She’s giving him her full attention, “I bet you’re good,” She puts her hand on his thigh, feeling nothing but hard muscle and she shivers when his legs spread out comfortably.

“I’m okay,” His bland answer doesn’t please her, she places her hand on his shoulders to feel how loose they've become.

“Mh, I can tell you’re more than okay,” She giggles, face getting closer to his. It’s evident that he took something, his pupils are huge and his hand's borderline tremble when she gets close. “your arms look so strong, and your tattoos are so-”

“What do you want?” He deadpans, his body feeling jittery and warm from the effects of the crushed pill.

“Well, I thought we could have a good time,” She boldly moves to sit on his lap, her thighs warm but not right, not yours. “you look like you could use one.”

“I- I can’t,” He pulls her arms from around his neck and pushes her off, causing her to frown.

“What? You have a girlfriend or something?”

“Yeah,” He leans back once again, legs spread and now irritated that you’re not here for him to sink his finger in, “I’m not fucking that up.”

“You have a wife and kids too?” She bites back.

He rubs the back of his neck, he’s sweating. “No, but-”

“Then I don’t see a problem,” She kisses him without warning and he doesn’t react quick enough to push her away. There’s a smirk on her face when she pulls back and his doe-eyes lose a bit of their sparkle, “no ring, no rules. That’s how I see it.”

“Don’t,” He pushes his hair back, mind reeling with the need to cuff himself to something so he can’t move. He wipes his mouth, “I can’t mess up what I have because of some whore-”

“Call me what you will,” She cups his jaw with a smile, “but you can’t take lover’s speed without a lover, loosen up.”

* * *

“I think we’re all finished up for tonight girls, thanks for helping me out,” It’s been a few hours and you guys were more focused on the reality TV show than parking the silverware, but you got it done.

“No problem, Ro,” You look down at your phone, it’s getting late.

“Are you sleeping over, Y/n?”

“Um, I can, it is getting kind of late,” You got up to go to the bathroom and the three of them went straight to their phones.

From the couch, Yuna’s eyes go wide and she shows Rosie her phone. Harmony grabs the phone so she can see why they’re looking like they’ve seen a ghost, “Oh my God, is that-” She whispers, “Is that Jungkook?...Does Y/n know-”

“Do I know what?” You walk out of the bathroom, brows furrowing when you hear them trying to be hush-hush. “Why are you guys looking like that?”

“Have you seen Sean’s story?”

“No,” You frown, “what happened?” You quickly grab Yuna’s phone to see what she’s talking about. At first, you don’t know what you’re looking at until you see it.

It’s a group photo and Jungkook’s in the back, he’s in the back with some girl smothering his face with her own.

“When was this posted?” You ask calmly, biting your lip to keep from throwing the phone out of the window

“20 minutes ago,” Yuna answers, “at Milo’s.”

“Okay,” You give the phone back to Yuna and you grab your keys.

“Y/n, what are you doing?”

“I’m going to that club.”

Rosie stands up with you, “Hold up, we’re going with you.” You tie your converse and the three of them follow you on your hunt.

Don’t do this to me Jungkook,

don’t do this to me.

* * *

“My bitch told me you threw her out, Min, what the fuck?”

“Your bitch was selling coke in my shop, I had to let her go,” Yoongi stands up, “you told me she was good for a job but she was bringing crackheads to my shop.”

“You told me you’d give her a job, you’re telling me you just fired her? Why didn’t you give her a chance? You used to sell-”

“Yeah, I used to. But I don’t anymore.” Yoongi leaves the room.

Meanwhile, Jungkook’s on the other side of the club with a loud group of guys, downing shots like he’s back in college.

“Jungkook,” Yoongi grabs his arm, and his pupils are blown, his cheeks are red, “I’m heading out, can you drive yourself home?”

“Yeah, I’ll be okay,” Jungkook gives him a reassuring look, “I’m good, Hyung, I’m so good.”

“What did you take?” Yoongi looks at him for a moment, not trusting Jungkook to go anywhere himself, “Hey, call yourself a driver, okay?” Yoongi pats his back before leaving the stuffy place.

When he walks out the front door, he could have sworn he saw you pass him with a group of girls. If that’s true, then Jungkook’s in for a world of trouble.

This environment is foreign to you, you’ve been in it before but it’s always been too much, too loud. Your outfit doesn’t help you blend in at all, your gray converse, shorts, and t-shirt are quite contrasting to what the other girls are wearing. Your body is shaking, the people who are shooting you weird looks don’t matter to you, you need to see him.

“There he is,” Harmony points to the corner where Jungkook is leaned up against, he looks like a train-wreck. His hair is so disheveled and he looks jittery, anxious, but he’s smiling. How did he manage to do that to himself in just a few hours, “if you need back up, we’ll be over here.”

You nod, putting your best foot forward to walk a clear path towards him.

Only when you tap his shoulder from behind does he turn around to look at you. The high, the clouds are evaporating and he’s starting to feel the sweat on his brow, I’m sweating? For a moment he thinks you’re a hallucination, there’s no way you’re actually here.

He reaches out to touch you but you slap his hand away. That’s definitely you.

“Y/n,” He rubs the back of his neck, “what are you doing here?”

“Is this what you do when you leave? You come here to cheat on me and do drugs,” You bite your lip, when he just stares at you with dark eyes, “answer me.”

“What’re you talking about?-” You shove your phone into his chest.

“What do you call that, Jungkook? She’s all over you!” Tears start to prick at your eyes but you push it down, you try to. “What are you trying to do to me?”

He stares down at the phone, his chest tingling and heart aching at the sight. It was taken moments before he got up and left, she got on him but he willed himself to leave her. He was out of it, couldn’t really remember any details. “I took something, and I’m not-...” He gives you back your phone, dragging his hands down his face. “I wouldn’t cheat on you, I didn’t-”

“Don’t fucking lie to me!” You yell but the music is so loud, it sounds like you’re speaking at a normal volume. “After everything I’ve done for you, after everything we’ve been through, I can’t believe you would do this to me,”

“Hey, hey, what’s going on?” Some guy with electric blue hair barges into your conversation. “What’s wrong, baby girl?”

You look at him, judging by his looks alone and the way he physically sides with Jungkook, you can piece together that they know each other.

“Um, was I talking to you?” You snap, looking at him as if he just grew a second head.

“No, but you look like you’re giving my friend here a hard time. I’d appreciate it if you calmed the fuck down, no one likes a-”

“And I’d appreciate it if you’d mind your own business. I’m his girlfriend, who the fuck are you?”

Mingyu cracks a nervous smile, “Oh shit,” He looks at Jungkook who’s finding it hard to stay still, “so, you’re the exclusive. I’m sorry, I may have set him up with a playmate for the night, but can you blame me? You obviously weren’t gonna join him,” He shrugs, “he just wanted to have a good time.”

“Y/n, I took ecstasy, I smoked a little bit, ok? That’s it, I didn’t do anything with that girl,” Jungkook glares at Mingyu, ”she kept coming on to me but it didn’t go anywhere-”

“You’re high, you don’t know where it went.” You turn his face to see red lipstick spotting his skin, “Look at your neck, it went somewhere...”

His hand comes goes there and he remembers the forced kiss before he ran out of the private room.

“Y/n, please it’s not what it looks like,” He let’s out a grown of frustration, grabbing your wrist, “let’s talk about this somewhere else.”

“No,” You pull away, “don’t touch me,” He grabs continues to pull you towards the direction of the bathroom, “Let go! Let go of me-”

You jerk away and mistakenly bump into a fast-walking individual, he was trying to get Jungkook. Oops.

“Tell Yoongi that’s what it costs,” that’s what you hear and then the guy runs off.

When you hear a scream, it seems like the whole club stops and people start backing away.

Why are they screaming?

Only when you feel the wetness dripping down your knee do you realize why they were all looking at you. You stumble, placing your hand on your thigh when Rosie comes running up to you with tears in her eyes, her hands are trembling. “Y/n, oh my God-”

When you look up, Jungkook is shouting so loud that you can hear the strain in his voice and he’s running. There’s blood all over your leg, your leg is shaking.

“We need to put pressure,” One of the girls takes off her flannel and ties it around your leg, “give me a belt, somebody!”

Some random guy gives her a belt and she wraps it around your leg tight. “Y/n, we’ll take you to the emergency room down the road, we need to get you out of here,” Rosie tries to help you to your feet but you wince, “can you stand? Harmony, help me!”

“Yeah, I think I can- Ouch!” You cry-out when they pull you up a little too fast, “wait, stop! That hurts-”

When they finish, Yuna and Harmony pull your arms to wrap around their shoulders, they look like their struggling. Jungkook suddenly breaks through the crowd of people, hair sweaty and eyes frantically scanning over you. He wants to throw up, but he can’t right now.

“Give her to me,” Jungkook extends out his arms so he can take you from the girls but Rosie guards you from him with her whole body, “what the fuck? Move,”

“Haven’t you done enough?” She frowns. “We can handle this, why don’t you-”

“Come off it! I’m not about to let you three fucking drag her out of here like this, she’s gonna bleed by the time you get to the fucking door!” He moves Rosie out of the way, “Let me carry her.” Neither of the girls argue when he grabs you from them and lifts you into his arms.

In a matter of seconds, you’re outside and the cool air makes you cringe, holding Jungkook’s shirt tighter in your fist. “You okay?” He whispers, glancing down at you when you give a weak nod.

Yoongi was outside at his car talking and his heart sinks into his stomach when he sees your bloodied leg in Jungkook’s arms. Among the other people leaving the club, you and Jungkook were the last people he thought he’d see.

“What the fuck happened in there?”

“Some guy was trying to stab me but she got in the way,” Jungkook explains in a panicked tone, “he said to tell you this is what it costs,” When Rosie opens his back seat door, he eases you to lay on the leather seats and gets back there with you.

“We’re taking her to the emergency room,” Rosie answers before closing the front-seats door and cranking the car up.

“Son of a bitch,” Yoongi pulls out his keys and gets in his car. That’s all he says before pulling out of the parking way faster than he should have.

Jungkook is sitting where your legs are so he can keep it propped up, “You’ll be okay,” He pants, the effects of the drug still running it’s course in his system, “does it hurt a lot?”

You nod, stomach-turning at the smell of your own blood. You mumble, “I feel like I’m gonna throw up...”

He looks down at his hands, tattoos now colored red from your blood. “Me too...”

Jungkook and Rosie brought you inside while the girls waited in the car.

“Excuse me,” Rosie goes to the front desk and Jungkook goes is walking not far behind her, “my friend was just stabbed, does she need to sign in or something? She’s bleeding a lot-”

As soon as Jungkook came into their line of vision, the sight of your bloodied leg kicks them into an urgency.

“Bring her here,” A woman with lilac scrubs says something to a few people before she’s walking Jungkook to the back and directing him to a room, “sit her there, miss, do you feel dizzy at all?”

Jungkook hesitantly lays you on the little bed and two more people come into the room, both dressed in scrubs—he’s asked to step back.

“Just a little,” You bite your lip when they start removing what was covering your wound, it looked as bad as it felt, or maybe it’s just really bloody. They start taking wiping your thigh of the blood that covered it. You look away, not wanting to see the damage.

“Sir?” A woman finally gets his attention after the third time calling him, when he looks at her, his eyes are a dead give away. That, and the smell of marijuana and liquor on him. “Have you taken anything tonight? You don’t look so good,”

He disregards her question with a question of his own, “...Wh- where’s the bathroom?”

“Down the hall to your left, but-”

He runs out of the room before she can say anymore and he passes Rosie on his way there.

He bursts inside and locks himself in a stall. Immediately, he falls to his knees and painfully expels whatever he had consumed tonight into the toilet.

His throat burns and his heart is pounding.

This was always the worst part.

“So, how long will I need the crutches?” You look at your now-useless leg. “I’m an ice skater, I have competitions to prepare for, and-”

“Two weeks at the very least, but I would recommend no strenuous activity for a month at the least. With how close the wound was to the artery, you’re lucky it’s not longer.” The nurse smiles, probably thinking she was lightening the mood.

It’s just and the nurse, Rosie ran to the restroom and Jungkook hasn’t come back since he brought you here.

“So,” Rosie walks inside, “how long are you on the crutches?”

“Two weeks,” You frown, staring at them from the corner of your eyes, “this would happen to me, wouldn’t it?”

“It could have been anybody,” Rosie sighs, “I’m just glad you’re okay.”

“Miss, you have a visitor by the name of Min Yoongi, do you want to see him?”

You nod

After a few moments, she opens the door and Yoongi walks in.

“Y/n,” Yoongi comes to your side, guilt eating him up that he was the cause for this. “I’m sorry this shit had to happen to you, I don’t-”

“It’s not you’re fault, okay? Don’t beat yourself up about it, I shouldn’t have been there...”

“Did Jungkook leave?”

“He ran to the bathroom earlier, I haven’t seen him since,” Rosie says that with a bite in her tone, and soon enough he’s walking inside the room, “that’s probably for the best, he’s the last person you need right now.”

Get it together.

He cupped water in his hands, swished it in his mouth and spit it out. When his eyes meet the mirror, he wanted to slam into it, shatter into a thousand pieces for bearing his face. He does his best to wipe the blood from his arms and hands with soap water and a napkin. He also wipes the lipstick from his neck, scrubbing at it unnecessarily hard until its gone. Nausea has faded enough for him to stand up and face you. But the thought alone makes him want to disappear. He can’t stay in this bathroom forever, even if that’s what his mind is telling him to do.

“Miss,” the door opens again, “The man from earlier, he said he’s your boyfriend, he wants to see you, are you alright with that?” you hesitate for a moment when you look at Rosie who’s sitting in the chair next to you, you nod.

The woman leaves for a moment and Jungkook walks in, he searches for you as soon as he walks in. He doesn’t acknowledge Yoongi or Rosie. He walks to your bedside and looks at the white bandage wrapped around your thigh.

“What did they say?” He’s not as pale as he was but his eyes are a little red. “Are you okay?”

“She’ll be on crutches for two weeks, but she can’t skate for at least a month,” She turns to Jungkook, “the wound was close to the artery, an inch difference and she would’ve bled out, no thanks to you.”

Silence befalls the room and even though she said that to make Jungkook wake up, Yoongi is the one who feels so bad about it. “I have to go, guys,” Yoongi suddenly speaks up, “feel better, Y/n, I’m sorry about all of this,” It’s not his fault, you remind him of that before he leaves.

“We just need your insurance,” The nurse comes back with a wheelchair within seconds, “the pharmacy you’d like your medicine sent to and you’re all set to go,” She helps you into the chair and rolls you out.

As they check you out, Rosie looks down at her phone, it’s almost two in the morning. You notice she looks tired as you hand them your insurance card, and she still has to pick up her parents in the morning, you don’t feel right keeping her here.

“Ro, go home,” You gently grasp her hand, “you have to pick up your parents in the morning, it’s getting late.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m fine, thank you for everything, tell the girls I’ll call in the morning,” You know it takes everything in her not to stay but she knows it’s late and even if you’re both pissed at him, he can at least take you home. You get her to agree and you’re left with Jungkook and the nurse as they take you to his car.

“Are you okay, hon?” The nurse asks softly as Jungkook watches her help you into the passengers seat. You know what she means by that. You know how this probably looks to her, it doesn’t look like you’re in a good situation. But you reassure her that he’s going to take you home.

When he gets in the driver's seat and the nurse is back inside the ER, you can feel him staring at you. He swallows, hands gripping the wheel incredibly tight, “Look, I’m sorry this happened, I-”

“Take me home,” You cut him off, looking out of the window with the crutches at your side, “just take me home...”

The drive is quiet. Painfully quiet for him. He pulls into his normal parking space and when he gets out, he comes to your side.

“Let me help you,”

That’s the first thing he says to you, hand extended as if you’d actually take it. You’re not skilled with crutches, you shouldn’t have been so persistent on getting and going to the door without his help, but you were.

“I don’t want your help,” You mumble, hobbling inside after he opened the door with his key. He flips on the light and you sit on the couch to try to kick your shoes off, “you should go home,”

“Y/n, please,” He closes the door behind him, “I know what you saw, I know it looked bad but I didn’t cheat on you.”

“Yeah, but you let some slut put her hands on you,” You forget trying to take off your shoes and you use your crutches to try to get to your room, “y’know, if you wanted to break up with me you could’ve just said it. If I’m not enough for you, you should have just told me.”

“You know you’re enough for me, don’t even talk like that. I don’t want to break up, why the fuck would I want that?” He follows you into your bedroom, easily catching up because you can’t get anywhere fast now.

“I wasn’t thinking straight, but my mind was clear enough to know we didn’t have sex,” He’s in your face, “I’m sorry that it looked that way, okay? Is that what you want to hear?”

“No, don’t tell me what you think I want to hear,” You sit on your bed, again trying to kick-off your shoes but failing miserably, “just leave me alone.”

“You can’t even take your own fucking shoes off, you need help,“ He kneels down and you don’t fight when he takes them off for you, “don’t you trust me?”

You scoff, grabbing your crutches and trekking to your bathroom to get away from him, “Why should I,” You attempt to close the door but he stands in the doorway, “let go of the door.”

“No,” He’s getting upset now, you can feel it in the way each word leaves his mouth like a curse, “stop walking away! I fucking love you, that’s why you should trust me.”

“Wow, with a reason like that,” You let out a sarcastic laugh, standing in your bathrooms doorway. “I guess I should forget everything that happened tonight, huh?”

He rubs his temples, the headaches he’s had from an hour ago now acting up. “You know what? If you didn’t have trust issues, you could see that I’m telling you the truth, I swear to god I didn’t do anything.”

“I know I have trust issues,” You’re sick of standing in the bathroom, “after all the times I’ve been screwed over, you’ve given me plenty of reasons not to trust people.” You move past him, bumping into his shoulder.

“Hey,” He tries to grab you but hobble away from him and towards your bed, “would you stop walking away?! I’m trying to talk to you!” When he sees that you’re close enough to your bed, he takes the crutches from you and sits them on the floor behind him.

“What the hell?-” Your mouth hangs open in shock as you grapple to hold on to him so you don’t fall. “Why would you do that!”

“That was the only way I could stop you from walking away.” He towers above you, height and large frame reminding you that he can overpower you easily. “Don’t you see I’m being honest? Tell me why you’re acting like this.”

“You know I was hurt in my last relationship. Do I really have to spell it out for you? I dated for months before I realized I was being played. I couldn’t see what was happening right in front of my face, do you know how that felt? I felt so stupid,” You squeeze his arms, “I swore I’d never let anyone make me feel that way again.”

He breathes in and out, trying not to fall apart at your teary confession, he chants in his mind, don’t cry, don’t cry.

“I can’t go through that again, I love you...” You hold on to him, leg throbbing and tears falling down your cheeks in single drops, “Don’t make me look stupid for loving you.”

That hurt.

“I won’t,” he wishes he had stayed home—he wishes he would have stayed with you. “I won’t, I promise I won’t.”

You gasp when his hands cup your face and he kisses you, open mouth sealing over yours without warning. You fall victim to this every time, you try to listen to the voice in your head that tells you to push him away, but how could you? You grab at his wrists to keep your self grounded and he holds you tighter, making you breathe nothing but him. His mouth goes bone dry and he feels sweat dripping down his back, he’s burning up and his heart is beating out of his chest.

“Jungkook,” You manage to breathe out, and you plop down on the bed, “you’re sweating like crazy.”

“I’m sorry, I feel like I’m gonna pass out,” Suddenly, he rips off his shirt and tosses it somewhere, now revealing the sheen of sweat that’s been under his shirt.

“Are you okay?...What you took, have you ever taken it before?...” Worry shakes your voice.

“Yeah, this used to happen sometimes, give me a second,” He disappears into the bathroom and you hear the water turn on. Somehow, you managed to stumble over to the bathroom with the help of the wall. Jungkook is standing at the shower, the water on cold as he dunks his upper body under it with a groan of relief.

You watch as he grabs a towel from the rack and dries his face and hair. You watch as he dries the water off his body, face still red but he looks better.

“I’m sorry, this is one of the reasons I stopped using that shit,” He sits the towel on the counter, heavy ids landing on your frame in the doorway. For the first time, he sees the bandage on your leg in his right mind and it pains him.

Noticing that you weren’t using the crutches he threw away earlier, he comes to your aid. “Your leg, don’t stand with it like that, you need to have it propped up,” For the second time tonight, he picks you up and carries you to you out of the bathroom. “It must hurt.”

“It does,” You hesitantly unwrap your arms from his neck and he lays you down, “it hurts a lot.” With expectant eyes, you watch him circle around your bed to get to your drawers. He pulls out a shirt and some shorts, sitting them besides you.

“I’m sorry,” He mutters, handing you the shirt so you can put it on while he helps replace your bloodied ones, “I wish he would have stabbed me, I fucking deserved it, not you.” He’s absolutely right.

His hand rests on the bandage and he looks up at you, eyes so tired. Reaching over you, he takes one of your pillows and props it under your leg, making sure it's elevated at a comfortable angle. He sits on the edge of the bed, one arm across your body, his eyes shutting when he presses his forehead to yours. Desperately, he kisses you again. His damp hair dangles on your forehead and his necklace drapes over your neck the more he leans down, its cool on your skin. His warm body engulfs you, his sheer heaviness making you weak. He has a special ability to surround your senses and drown you in his energy, and you sink happily.

“I’m sorry,” He whispers, “I hate that we always end up like this, I shouldn’t put us through this...” Brushing your hair away from your face, he leans, in his nose a tinge red and his eyes teary, “but when I’m with you-...When I have you, I don’t have to see myself anymore and it feels right. I hate myself without...” Tears stream down his cheeks and a few drop on your cheeks. His chest heaves against you when he shakily breathes in. He drops his head in your chest like a child and starts to cry.

“Jungkook,” You run your fingers through his hair and your eyes get misty when a pained whine leaves his mouth.

“I-” he hiccups against your t-shirt. “I’m sorry that this is what it cost to love me, but I’m not shit without you. I’m nothing with you...”

Sitting here, patching myself up, crying over what's left, 'cause without you I ain't shit, but no pressure. Guess I gotta learn my lesson.

#Jungkook boxer!au #jungkook scenarios #jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #jungkook smut #jungkook fanfic #bts smut #bts fluff #bts angst #bts boxer!au #jungkook x you #jungkook x reader #iceskater!au #quarters #bts imagines #bts scenarios

315 notes · View notes

howling-harpy · 4 years

Note

Speirton....fake dating 😂

Oh myyy. Thank you for the ask!! This would be a disaster. I have no idea how to keep this canon but let's try.

They'd pose as "a couple" in order to give a good example. Like, 'see? We get along and we care about each other and work together even though we are polar opposites! Look how professional we are!'

This is when they are friendly and sort of privately shocked how well they work together and gosh how wonderful the other is!

They are both secretly pining just a bit, harboring a little bit of crush, just a small one, and doing their everything to keep themselves from plummeting straight to love.

They both think the other is too different to possibly be even a bit interested, so faking is as good as it gets.

Lip is so. Damn. Sweet. Speirs always thought he was sweet to everyone, but he was wrong. There's an entire world of sweetness he's reserved for a lover, and Speirs is so not prepared.

Speirs is known for being unpredictable and temperamental. His loving is like that too, in a way: he seems aloof and tough, but then all of a sudden reaches out to stroke your cheek, to hold your hand, or to give you a little gift. Lip is struck right in the heart every time.

What drives both of them up the wall is the polite courtesy that they keep up to keep it fake. "I very much appreciate you, dear," Speirs is forced to say and briefly touch Lip's hand when all he wants to do is throw him over a desk and devour him.

"Why thank you. The feeling is mutual," Lip answers with a smile and dies a little bit because he wants to mean it.

The worst part is giving the act up when they are alone. The distance feels wider every time, and now that they've touched a little, returning to nothing is painful.

They keep finding excuses to stay closer, and every time the other thinks it's just a coincidence.

They learn a dance: One suggests something daring, which the other refuses, one insists, and thus the other hesitantly agree.

"We should share a room." "That's way too much! Too risky, that isn't funny, no need to overdo it, no no no." "Come on, just the same room, we don't need to actually share a bed!" "Well..... alright, I guess?" And then there's only one bed that the both of them absolutely didn't know.

Finally, it is too much. Too much to be that close and get only a little taste under pretences. Too much to keep pretending like it's a chore when it's really a dream. Too much to keep refusing and saying no when all you want to do is scream, "yes, oh god yes!"

Which is exactly what Lip keep repeating into Speirs' ear. 👀

#band of brothers #speirton #BoB headcanon

29 notes · View notes

thespiritofthoughts1234 · 3 years

Text

The warriors

Hi, my name is Isabela! I live in a small town called Ocna’s Village in Romania. Actually, I was born in Italy, but I’ve moved to Romania without knowing why, ok when I moved, I was a baby so is pretty logic to not know lots of things on that young age…Eh, doesn’t matter, cause now I don’t wanna tell you my story, but I really want to discuss about Dimension F35A.

F35A is a place where everything that appears to be unrealistic, impossible or even dumb on this planet it can happen there. Now you might ask yourselves: “How can a little girl know so much about an interdimensional world”, well I know because I WAS THERE. You know, a very long time ago it was known about a rock that once rubbed by someone, it could create a portal between dimensions. That rock was called then a “curly rock”, a natural object that can be modeled in any other form, in today’s world it can be recognized in bracelet form and you can purchase it at an affordable price… (I swear I don’t make advertisement) …not true, actually you get it from birth (not literally anyone can say that).

This dimension was perfect for my imagination, but it comes out that…I couldn’t get there till I turned 7…okay, technically, even at that age I still could NOT go in that universe, so I took my mom’s bracelet -I know that I’m not a good role-model, but I was DESPERATE, I asked her each year on my birthday (to be more convincing), and guess what she told me…I’ll make a scheme to show you my agony: -3years=No.

-4years=No!

-5years=NO!

-6years=NOO!

-7years=NOOO!

So, it turns out that I’ve woken up for 8 years (1 year was under warranty) at 6 am because I had a “noghtmare” (eh, eh, get it…anyway, I wanted to make a pun but I noticed that no one laughed…L-LET’S KEEP GOING).

Ok, so when I first got in, I saw… a party with ponies and rainbows, that is what you were thinking...well, YOU’RE WRONG, it was just an unending war with random characters, it means that Batman could fight Bambi or something like that. Anyway! I looked around, everything was a chaos, but I’ve noticed something weird, I realized that everyone in there was fighting for a purpose or covering themselves or conquering new territories, so I made up a purpose too…the most important one. The thing that actually matters is that someone must clean this mess, a person that must be good, brave, and WORTHY FOR SUPREME LOYALTY, a creature that will stop this disaster.

And that’s why I’m…going to find it, what did you think that I am the person, no, not even a word, I won’t get into those knuckleheads, they freak me out.

So, I transformed myself into a mouse and tried to reach the closest spot to hide (a rock…t-there will be many rocks in this story). And exactly when I thought that I’m safe, a giant robot crushed me (obviously I didn’t die because after you are crushed, sliced, shot, burnt, etc. you get back to your home dimension). But a second before game over I saw an iconic red color being, with deep black eyes that penetrate souls, three fox tails, two fox ears and one fox nose, who wore a leaf that covered all of its body, and who appeared to be a little bit confused by the chaos behind him, but in the end, he still crossed the road, very chill, to resolve his problems. I scanned it to have it like “skin” in the future (Minecraft users in the public, or Standoff or PUBG, whatever) but what future, because that stupid stack of iron CRUSHED ME:

--Hmm, what if I turn in that thing? I did it. Ew, this leaf doesn’t work on me… therefore, I changed. I was wearing a blue vest, white shirt, black jeans and brown boots…BOOM, it’s betTEEEER! I was screaming because a giant iron sole was going to crush me again (I would give a reply but I don’t have one…OH, WAIT, it looks like we can’t STEP inside without being CRUSHED by hospitality, HA HA, I’m a horrible pun maker…BACK TO THE STORY). However, I’m talking about one second before the impact, I ran but not like a penguin, I ran like FLASH:

--WHAT THE…WOW, I am running with the speed of light (clearing throat), doesn’t matter, now let’s find that person…I will look over mountains and valleys, lakes and oceans, and I will be recognized like “The random girl who brought the hero of this world” … after I will visit this place with the super-speed thing. Now I think I went through 3 kingdoms -I despite no one saw me- And then I arrived on a land with a dense fog, without…(cough)…clEAn AiR:

--NO…I need…(COUGH)…to continue mY qUeSt-not too far away from me stand a humanoid silhouette…at least that’s what I thought…however, I started to scream, powerless: PLEASE…(COUGH)…YOU, THE STRANGER IN THE HORIZON …I’M VERY YOUNG…EVEN IF I APPEAR TO BE IN MIDDLE AGE FROM THE DISTANCE AND UNCLEAN AIR! I fainted waking up in a cave:

--(Clearing throat again)…Uh, where am I? I said after being a little dizzy.

Suddenly a sound came out of nowhere, like a growl:

--W-what? Who’s there? I asked scared. An animal came out of shadow, actually it was the same animal that I saw a few moments ago: You again! What do you want for appearing in those mysterious ways? the animal growled harder showing its big fangs: Uuuh, what BIG fangs you got there, buddy, ha, ha! Wait do I have fangs too?! What’s your name? No, no, no, how do your friends call you? I have many questions about…you…I was slowly going back, because the animal was slowly coming to me. Unfortunately, I reached the end of the cave: Understand that I mean no harm, although we are in the same species, no…I scanned you, didn’t I…I scanned you…and I transformed into you, I hope you don’t want to…EAT ME?! I said with a worried expression.

After the last phrase the humano-animal -partial human, partial animal- for a second it stopped, and then it came rapid, got its huge bloody red color claws out -literally anything is red on you? – Well in that moment I nodded and I said:

--N-nice…c-claws. Did you do your manicure?... the best pun that I could tell to a creature with an unpredictable behavior, oh and more than that,

before I didn’t know if she/he was furious or happy, because I was seeing just his/her dark eyes -even the gender is unknown-, and after that innocent joke its eyes changed a lot, they were yellow with a keen red iris. “OH MY GOD I’M SO DEAD!” I said to myself…BUT yes, of course, I can’t die in this dimension, yeah thank you for reminding me, I don’t need to worry…just if I bump into a particularly type of being…a being that can destroy anyone and anything…

Is known about an ancient legend that reveals some sort of creatures, warriors, who disintegrate everything that stays in their way, although it doesn’t exist in their dimension, it’s speculated that those legendary creatures are the most dangerous beings in the multiverse…who told me? ... Mama told me!... Ok I don’t know how those legends look, but I hope that the respective humano-animal wasn’t a part of those fighters -WAIT A SECOND I HAVEN’T NAMED THE GUY YET, hmmm…let’s see…Neferis…no, to Grecian…Falohe, no, to Hawaiian, hmmm…Do…Ba…Aaaa I know, Zentofea, why this name? I DON’T KNOW!

Back to the story: That Zentofea -Oh gosh, I love this name- came closer to me being just as predictable as unpredictable like before, but the Zeantofea…Zen-a-to-fe-a?... seeming to be more furious. I said quickly:

--WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME! the Zento- Agh- that humano-animal, appeared to attack me, …but no, he/she? Destroyed the boulder behind me to make clear way to the outside world…really nice gesture from a wild animal…By the way, after that giant stone, there was a pasture full of cold crystal flowers - why didn’t they named them ice flowers-: WOW, I hope you wanted to do this for the first time, because you might just miss and… Ya’ know…

At first, the animal had a disapproving look, and then it smiled and leaved:

--Ok…anyway…I’M GOOD! Now I seriously need to find that person, the battlefield is getting dirty, and I don’t want to clean the mess…I made a few turns in the pasture…aaand then I got lost…Um…I think I should go in that way…or that way…or…that…way…uuuh, …HEEEELP! After the previous phrase a humano-animal came out of the forest near the pasture: DUDE, if I owe you, every time you appear, I’ll buy you a yacht. Then the animal came closer, showing itself not being a Zentofea, but a humano-animal with a body of a wolf, a more evolved wolf, with human head and some different sized crystals placed uniform on the fluffy chest -I should wear glasses.

It came and smelled me:

--Uuuh, are you some sort of dog? it has stopped from smelling for a second and showed his sharp fangs… sharper than Zentoffe-a’s ones -I’m still thinking how to pronounce it correctly-…anyway…of course I got scared: UUUH, GOOD BOY, GOOD BOY, SIT! He growled: WHAT, DID I OFFENDED YOU IN SOME WAY?!SAY! LOOK I DON’T KNOW WHO YOU ARE AND WHAT YOU ARE, BUT TO KNOW THAT TODAY IS MY FIRST DAY IN HERE, AND ALL THE ANIMALS ALREADY HATE ME!

--Get out of our territory, Zentofea!

--Ooooh, so it’s pronounced Zentofe-e-a, ok I noted AND HEY, HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT NAME, and did you say “OUR territory”!? after that phrase, a bunch of more humano-animals came out of the forest. Ya’ know, don’t ya’ think you have to many friends? They were slowly approaching me, I know, you think that I could’ve escaped, but the answer is NO, I couldn’t escape because I was surrounded, and I also know I could have jumped, but those animals seemed to have springs instead of legs, really now, I think they evolved from kangaroos…Siberian kangaroos. Many of those animals had an white with a little of black fur, WE C-CONTINUE: So I was there surrounded by those oversized human-headed dumb dogs, I was helpless, TIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII- increase the suspense-IIIIIIIIIIIILLL … nothing happened, I’m kidding, I figure it out that:” BUT WAIT I HAVE SECRET WEAPONS TOO!”. I tried to annoy myself to get my claws out, first time it didn’t work, and then I thought about the most annoying thing for me, not even this worked because I love all the things unless the things that I hate, so I went to Karate, Judo, and putting my fingers in other one’s eyes:

--OUCH, WHY DID YOU DO THAT?!

--That’s how I know!

Even with my MASTER moves, I still couldn’t stop those hundreds of humano-wolves - hmm, surprising- until one bit my tail. In that moment I was angry- I took out the sharp fangs, yellow eyes with small pupil and iris, big claws, now I don’t boast myself, but I took down at least 20 wolves, ok I boast myself a little bit. Doesn’t matter because everything happened in my MIND, after that guy who I put my fingers in his eyes, another one threw a stump in my head.

I woke up tied up of a plank, carried by 4 human-wolves -I’ll name them later- to the chief of the tribe. They put me in a cage, still tied, with fire under the cage, very chill. The chief said:

--Oh, divine spirit of the frozen forest we give you this offering in exchange of a great dinner.

--An offering for a great dinner? Do you know that you can hunt? I mean you’re half wolves after all!

--GASP, who would’ve done such a shameful deed!? They looked offended.

--Says the guy who is making an offering to a horse!

--It’s a majestic wolf!

--Riiight, you really aren’t good at sculpture!

--Oh, yes, we are, everyone is criticizing us, and why aren’t you worried, you’ll be burnt, are you a player?

--OF COURSE, I AM -a brilliant idea just crossed my mind- n-not…of course I am NOT a player, because I’m a destroyer undercover!

A sound of surprise came from tribe:

--Wait a second why did you smell like a Zentofea?

--Well, it’s a special thing that none of you heard about, it’s called perfume!

--Oh!

--A-and if you don’t untie me, I’ll destroy you ALL!

--But if you’re a destroyer and you can destroy us, why didn’t you destroy the rope and the cage already?

--Uh- OH, yeah…uh, thanks…I forgot I can… DO… that -I was pretending to concentrate to destroy the cage, but as an amazing coincidence, a thing came out of nowhere and cut the iron box and saved me…still tied up…but free…i-in a way. Uuuuh, yeah, I telepathically sent a message to a recruit to save me, good job soldier! I caressed his head, good part he was fluffy, bad part he pulled out a laser gun from his pocket and pointed it to my forehead, he had 2 guns, the other one was pointed at the public -how dangerous can be a creature with 3 feet high:

--Run! Said The Short One, that’s how I call him, with a deep voice.

--I would’ve run already, if I haven’t my legs TIED UP!

--A Zentofea has stronger muscle power in lower limbs!

--…Yes…

--…That means that you can rip the string that ties your legs!

--Ooooh! I ripped the strings and I ran… after a few seconds I stopped and I returned to The Short One.

--WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING, I TOLD YOU TO RUN!

--I won’t let you down!

--I’ve been here more than you so I learned a lot in my time!

--Ok, I trust you on this, but can I do somethin’?

--Yes, try to survive!

--…I hope I can do that!

Well, it appears that The Short One had a plan to escape from that situation, I don’t know how, but The Short One shot with the laser gun in a cold crystal (ice), bounced off another two cold crystals (two pieces of ice), and then to the base of a tree, that rip causing a chain reaction, putting down tree by tree, the last tree falling in front of the angry crowd:

--WOOOOW!

--COME ON, I CREATED A DIVERSION!

--But, wait, how did you know that tree was going to fall in front of them? I have said while I was running with The Short One.

--D-do you really want to know?

--Uh, yes?

--Really, no one has asked me about this for a decade!

--Uh, about what?

--Science stuff…oh my God…I’m…so…excited…(clears throat) ok I’ll tell you…GASP, first time I calculated the area between the laser gun and the target, and then I’ve calculated the variables- he continued talking until I realized that we both have stop from running.

--Uh, dude ya know…an entire squad of human-wolves with six packs is like…following us!

--…And then I measured…

--…Uh, maaan?

--…But the distance was equal with…

--I beg you to stop!

--…So, I created a way to…

--Sigh, who am I kidding? I took him by the arm and jumped in a tree.

--…Although if I would’ve taken the theory…

--CAN YOU KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT…please? I put my hand to his mouth and I pointed to the tribe that passed us.

--Oh, yeah, I-I’m sorry!

--Look, man, I understand your excitement, I think you’re a little lonely here by your independent character, but can ya wait until we get rid of this dorks?

--Yeah, I know, and by the way I’m a girl!

--You are a girl, but how do you have such a deep voice? SHE took her mask off!

--It’s a changing voice device, dear!

--Oh. My. Goodness. YOU ARE SO CUTE! I think she was the cutest specie of humano-animal that I’ve ever met in my life. I hugged her… SHE WAS FLUFFY!

--Look, that’s why I’m always wearing a mask…ok, this and other 3 reasons!

--Daaww, why, like someone would really attack you?

--Yes, many would attack me, players, qualified and unqualified hunters, maybe…MY OWN ENEMIES!?

--Aaww, but wait, you have enemies?

--Yes!

--Why?

--Because of my high intelligence!

--Really, well, that means that you have common enemies with many of your species.

--Meh, not really, I’m a very rare case, usually creatures in my species are…

--Let me guess, dumb, goofy, jerks, but with no reason?

--I wanted to say idiots, but your description is much more extensive.

--I know how it feels, I mean a lot of people from my species are like that!

--Zentofea?

--No, humans…but I have one question, how does everybody know about this name? I named that creature!

--Uh, no, it has been named like that since forever!

--How?...

--Look, stop asking useless questions and care about your purpose!

--My purpose…OH YEAH, MY PURPOSE, I FORGOT ABOUT IT!

--How can you forget your own objective?

--My PURPOSE…is that an ocean? I’d said while I was exiting the forest.

--Yes, the terrestrial space from this planet is predominant in isles and archipelagos!

--DAMN IT, how am I going to cross the ocean now?

--But why do you want to cross it? Do you need to cover a territory?

--No…

--Do you want to conquer a territory?

--…No…

--Then why do you want to cross the ocean?

--I want to change the world!

--Wait, you want to change the world…alone?

--Nope, that’s why I’m looking for a person to help me!

--Wow, really…wow, you’re the first person who said that! Hey, HEY, what are you doing? I took off my boots, I rolled up my jeans and I tried to run above the water, for 3 seconds I really have run above the water, and then I began to sink. I swam back to the beach.

--So, do you wanna tell me…where…the heck…were you thinking?

--I thought that I could run on water.

--Kiddo, if in your dimension exists some force who keep things together, however are you calling…

--Gravity…

--I knew about that name, I’m a genius, I just wanted to clarify that you know what I’m talking about…What I wanted to say, is that, the respective force exists in this universe too, but it acts with a different attraction.

--Aha, so what other idea do you have?

--Hmmm, first, you still didn’t answer the previous question!

--Well, I think the person might be after the ocean!

--Do you think that this motivation is certain, I mean isn’t assuming an attempt to know something that can be inexistent, do you really think, in this life anything can have a scope, don’t you think that life is an illusion meant to prepare us of everything what can be beyond the bars of reality?

I remained without words:

--I made this up 10 seconds ago, what’s so hard to understand?

--No, no…I-I understood!

--Then why are you doing this!

--Um, I don’t know…I think I just needed an adventure!

--Then why did you choose to change this world?

--I don’t kn-…YOU KNOW WHAT, leave me alone with those weird questions, you’ll provoke me an existential crisis!

--Ok!

--I just wanted to know How. Can. I. Cross. THE DAMN OCEAN?

--Stay chill kid, I’ve got this! She took out a thing from her pocket and she blew in it, then a 45 feet animal came out of water and it wasn’t a blue whale. A little help from a seahorse!

--You can’t put the words “seahorse” and “little” referring to that thing!

--Oh, yes, I can. Player, say hi to Rudolf!

--RUDOLF? WHAT ARE YOU…SANTA…THE BARBARIAN!?

--Not really. Rudolf, say hello to the player! He said hello…i-in his language.

--Yep, I’m clearly going to make a raAAF- the monster picked me and sank into the water!

--Bye, bye, bon voyage through the ocean!

The monster took me to a temple under the water. In temple:

--COUGH…when I said to cross the ocean I DIDN’T MEAN UNDER WATER! All the torches in the room blew up.

--Greetings, my dear child! Said an old lady when she appeared from nowhere in front of my face.

--HOLY SHAMALAMA…sigh…ma’am I think you have the wrong person!

--No, no, that’s how I tell to the visitors!

--Ooo, so, you have tourists…riiight!

--No, every new player comes to me for the closet! She showed me like a Chinese closet -I made a redundancy, everything is made in China.

--Closet, do you have problems with the furniture?

--No, they get in it!

--So…you kidnap kids... I’m calling the police!

--No, you didn’t understand, it will be worth, plus is no police station in the middle of the ocean!

--You’re the creepiest person I’ve ever met in my life!

--Many people say that! Now, come on, it doesn’t bite!

--At least I got rid of a fear! I got in the closet, immediately after I got in, I remained unconscious and I woke up in another world.

I’ve heard a girly voice:

--WARM WELCOME TO THE DIMENSION OF THOUGHTS! Said a grey colored skin girl with black clothes and amber colored eyes. And I’m the Spirit of Thoughts!

--AAAAA!

--Hmm, I thought that a Zentofea wouldn’t fear of literally everyone who says hello!

--How did you know about that…AND MORE IMPORTANT, HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOWS ABOUT THAT NAME!?

--Well, first, I know what every player thinks, and second, I know about that name because I put it!

--But ho-

--How do I know that? Well, the answer is in the name, MY NAME, DUH!

--And how did I-

--And how did you name it? Ho ho, well, that’s simple kid, it’s because all of those subliminal messages that I left around the place!

--If-

--If I control the thoughts, why didn’t I end the war, yet? …It’s because that war shouldn’t end, it’ll declare the true leader of this world, like you said it must be a good, brave, and worthy person to clean this mess.

--An-

--And that means-

--Oh, will you please let me talk?

--Ok, go ahead!

--…And that means I’ll have to fight to make a little difference?

--Kid, I think that you will change the whole world, trust me, I don’t say this to any other player…but you have to fight for that, although it’s like the real life!

--Yeah…it is!

--…So, are you ready for your first match?

--Y-yes…yes, I do! Let the game begins.

#The Spirit Of Thoughts(me)#Isabela #F35A #The Short One #Rudolf #creepy lady #human-headed dumb dogs #Zentofea #my first post

1 note · View note

blehbleehhhh · 4 years

Text

An EreMika Baby😍💕

idkwhatimdoingsometimes has a ridiculously adorable request that I cant wait to share: "Hi! Hope you're doing ok❤️ can I suggest a eremika family fanfic where eren has to go away for a few days for a job in the survey corps and then returns home to greet his waifu and baby son and he just becomes super loving and doting? I thought about this last night at like 3am and thought it was adorable ❤️❤️❤️" So, I think I died after writing this. Way too cute of an idea. Don't come for me when you get a fluff induced heart attack. Sorry it took me a while to write, but I hope you all enjoy the sweetest couple ev as parents 😭❤️ Not all of the recent crazy shit in the canon-verse has transpired in this case.

It's been well over a year since the titans were successfully eradicated and there are many towns filled with homes that must be repaired. Levi has some very big shoes to fill after assuming Erwin's position as commander of The Su͏r͏vey Corps. Many of his talented soldiers have received some well deserved promotions such as Eren and Jean, who are now squad captains that lead their own soldiers to be just as fierce as themselves. Quite a few of them have joined the large group that gathered to help rebuild Connie's old village and wonderful things were done by the military in the hopes of helping humanity to start over. Nobody understands that desire better than Eren, who managed to mend the fragile relationship with his childhood friend Mikasa after the shifters were cured a few years back. They became inseparable immediately and have been an item for almost two years now, so it certainly wasn't long until a bed was added to the mix. And with the titans finally gone, everyone is feeling much more comfortable bringing children into the world again. The day that her pregnancy was discovered, they both agreed that one would always stay behind whenever expeditions arise in the off chance something horrific happens that would leave their baby son, Hannes, without his adoring parents. That was also the day Eren risked his life by suggesting a much deserved early retirement, since it's no longer necessary for her to be tethered at his hip. Mikasa's reaction was a gamble given her unpredictable pregnancy hormones at the time, though he truly wasn't surprised when she so passionately insisted that being soldiers has already made them good parents. His heart shattered as he watched tears stream down her face and slight confusion overcome her because something that was once so simple to control has now turned almost impossible for the moment. It was very obvious to the young man that she felt unsure as to why this reaction was so powerful at all. They both know that on any other occasion when trying to explain how much she loves what they do, especially now that they're really getting the chance to help others, wouldn't have made her break down. He'd conceded immediately of course, heartbroken and kicking himself extra hard for making her cry even though his instincts scream to protect her and their, at the time, unborn baby. After growing up together, living through a literal hell, and now that his shifting ability is cured, Eren fully intends to live out the rest of his days with this incredible woman.

Horse hooves gallop through an expansive valley before the old, abandoned castle that The Survey Corps now call home. They have been gone for three days now, so everyone felt a wave of relief and some even laughed with excitement. But the young father can only focus his attention on the barn visible in the distance and push his steed to gallop even harder. Thoughts of finally getting to hold Mikasa and their baby have been pleasantly clouding his mind since he kissed her goodbye a few days earlier, when they smiled as they conversed about how amazing this little boy is already because even the great Commander Levi can be seen frequently showing some degree of amusement since his birth. Uncle Armin is naturally Hannes's Godfather and seems to get a great amount of good from him as well. Who wouldn't love to see the toothless grin that he's recently discovered is possible to make, or look into those piercing little emeralds? This baby has been a gift to them all and with some other soldiers finally beginning to settle down, more tiny tots are sure to follow. Somehow while in casual conversation with comrades a few days earlier, the question was asked if he and Mikasa have considered adding another baby to their sweet little family. His immediate reaction was to smile and say no, that they haven't even thought about having a second child yet since she just had Hannes only three months ago. It was a lot to get used to at first that’s for sure, but the couple would absolutely die for their son and love him more than life itself.

The horses trotted up to the barn in unison as their hooves crunch through dried up leaves scattered on the autumn ground. Eren smiles as he swiftly dismounts his horse and allows his very fatigued mind to linger that crazy schedule the baby has his girl on. It's very strict, and his own body woke him up consistently while he was gone because he's so used to the way their old bed frame sometimes creaks when she attempts to sneak out of his arms to nurse their son, that he actually longs to hear it again. He lives for those heartwarming moments when she crawls back in bed afterwards and cuddles into him so she rests her cheek on his chest, because then he gets to feel how quickly she drifts off to sleep with those soft breaths on his neck. Fuck, I missed them so much. Eren smiles to himself as he gathers his tack with one arm and locks his horse in its stall, then half runs into the tack room to put everything away. He weaves himself through that hoard of soldiers and books it from the barn, completely ignoring Armin's friendly greeting from where he sat playing cards with some of their comrades because he’s so determined to get upstairs. But it didn't bother the blond at all, he simply smiled and shook his head. "I truly cannot think of two people who deserve to be happier." Eren heard him say and others in the room agree enthusiastically, a remark that he couldn't help but smile at. It's around mid day now, which means that Mikasa has already finished nursing their son and put him down for a nap, and will most likely be asleep herself. He opens the door carefully to avoid it's annoying creak and felt instant relief come over him to see his son safely sprawled out on his back, fast asleep in the crib at the end of their bed. He smiles as he carefully closes the door behind him and silently removes his boots, fixating his eyes on his girl while she sleeps peacefully curled up in a ball under the blankets. He sneaks around the crib to crawl into bed behind her and gingerly slides an arm under the pillow far from where her head lies, then drapes the other over her side to gently tuck his hand underneath. There was a sudden soft sigh when she slowly stretched her body back into his warm embrace, giving one glance over her shoulder with a sleepy smile as she blinks away her drowsiness. He always thought it was cute when she did stuff like that.

"You're back.." Mikasa mumbles as she turns her upper half to lean in for a sweet, welcoming kiss on the lips. "Try to keep your voice down, he's not sleeping well for me today." She yawns quietly into her hand and rests her head on the pillow once more, smiling wide as he presses light kisses to her cheek.

"Aw, poor kid." Eren whispers and smirks as she turns her head to meet his gaze, knowing that he loves this woman more than words can say. Hell, he always has. "Maybe he just missed his daddy."

"I know I missed his daddy.." She chuckles sleepily as her eyes flicker between those incredible emeralds and his highly kissable lips.

"Is that right?" He smiles and raises an eyebrow as he gently cradles her cheek in his hand, and she nods her head enthusiastically. Of course his amusement only grows as she leans in to kiss him, forcing them both to silence their own quiet laughter as not to wake the precious baby sleeping nearby. The last thing he needs is to be woken up before he's ready.

"So, how’d it go?"

"Exceptionally well. I believe we rebuilt around forty homes on this trip.”

"Gosh, I bet you looked really hot being all sweaty and whatnot..." Mikasa smiles between their soft, persistent kisses in response to his muffled laugh. "It's too bad that I wasn't there to see your incredible muscles in all their muscly glory.."

"Muscly glory?" Eren pulls away, pressing his lips together to keep himself from laughing aloud and smiling as he sits back to gaze into her eyes. "What the hell is that?"

"Heh, I’m sorry. I guess I’m still a little sleepy.."

"I know you're sleepy, Mika. It's pretty cute."

"You shut your mouth, hot shot, you're pretty cute yourself." Their attention is drawn to the foot of the bed when the baby suddenly stirs in his sleep, stretching his arms and legs before falling motionless once more with a tiny, squeaky sigh. Mikasa slowly sits up and blinks, clearing her vision to clear her vision that his little eyelids are still closed. The bed moves beside her and she can feel a wide grin stretch across her face when a pair of lips press tenderly against her cheek.

"You're both exceedingly adorable, you know. It's unacceptable." Eren chuckles lightly and pulls away to look at her as tears run down rosy, porcelain cheeks. He frowns as he moves his hand to gently cradle her opposite cheek and brought her closer to softly kiss those tears away. She grasps his wrist and gives a loving squeeze as he sits back to study her face. He smiles at her small grin of amusement and gently pushes his fingers through her hair. "Are you ever going to stop crying about how cute he is?"

"I mean, probably not.."

"I don't think you've stopped being weepy since you gave birth. Are you sure you're feeling okay?"

"I'm fine, gosh," Mikasa smiles, chuckling softly as she leans in to plant a kiss on his concerned frown. "And I worry to much?"

"You do worry to much and you know it. I just, I remember a few times from some of my old man's patients where women who give birth can become more sensitive. Often first time mothers, too."

"Look, I appreciate your concern, okay?" She says, their voices still at the same whispers as they gently rub the tips of their noses together. "But I would tell you if I were feeling sad."

"Would you?"

"Meh..."

"Exactly."

"No, seriously, I'll be upfront with you. We promised that to each other when we started dating, don't you remember?"

"Of course I do." Eren smiles as he presses his lips to hers and is pleased to feel these kisses returned so sweetly, the way they always are. He reaches for the silky hair invading their kiss and carefully pushes it aside, following her back slowly with their lips locked as he cradles her cheek in his large hand. They pull apart slowly after the need for air became too great to ignore and he smirks as he gazes lovingly into her eyes. "You're right, I'm sorry." He kisses her again and again, and pretty soon they were both trying desperately not to laugh aloud. But they were much more successful after the second time they pulled away and he suddenly found himself laying on his back. He adorably bites his lip as he moves his arm aside for her to cuddle into him and she couldn’t help but laugh to herself because the sight of someone known for being so tough has the sweetest soft side. She grins and happily takes her place laying up against him as he tightens his strong arm around her waist, knowing that he’s already more than used to the butterflies that’ll arise automatically from her lips smiling on his neck.

"Heh, thank you." Mikasa yawns softly as she listens to the comforting sound of his healthy heart beat and observes their little boy continue to sleep soundly. "I didn't think I'd get him down for his nap. He slept pretty well for me last night, though. Only woke up twice."

"That's wonderful. I was worried he wouldn't sleep well for you while I was gone since his routine would be all screwed up."

"He definitely loves being rocked to sleep by his daddy.."

"I missed you two so much it's honestly crazy."

"We missed you too." She smiles on his neck and presses her lips to this space as she lightly traces a small heart in the center of his chest. "I love you." Her lips smile against his skin once more when he kisses the top of her head.

"I love you too. You're mine for always."

"My heart only beats for you and our precious baby.." Mikasa smiles wide as she kisses up to his jaw and pulls away to rest her head on his chest. He lays his cheek on the top of her head as they cuddle together in silence and enjoy each other's company. The baby awakens gradually as his tiny hands wander up to rub his sleepy eyes and stretches out his limbs. His parents smile adoringly at their little boy as he watches them intently. "Gosh, both of my boys are so handsome.." She giggles softly as the hand resting on her hip slowly rubs along her side.

"Yeah, you're right, sometimes it is like I'm looking in a mirror." Eren says and she can hear the endearing change to his dreamy voice, even that his heartbeat increases with excitement. "So, did he laugh for you while I was gone? Or did I miss that milestone too like I missed the very first time he rolled over?" That was a heartbreaking moment for the young man who wasn't even on a mission at the time, but simply completing tasks on his 'hunny-do' list elsewhere. But without fail, his girlfriend had scooped up their baby boy and ran as safely as she could to share the incredible news with him. And when he finally saw Hannes roll over for the first time, he couldn't help but clap and smile his praises.

"Nope, though I got close a few times when he rolled on his belly. He was stuck for a little bit longer today so he wasn’t very happy with me," She giggles when their son flashes a wide, gummy grin and her heart feels absolutely full with the addition of Eren's genuine laughter. "Were you, baby boy?"

"His smile is adorable like yours."

"But those are your incredible eyes and handsome facial features in mini form." Mikasa turns her head slightly and presses her smile to the underside of his chin before she slides out of bed. She walks over to the crib and carefully lifts the baby into her arms, propping him up against her chest with his chin on her shoulder as she gently cradles the back of his head in her hand. "I'm certain that your mother would absolutely lose her mind over this little cutie..." She smiles as she softly kisses her baby's temple and one of his chubby cheeks, joyful eyes already locked on her loving boyfriend.

"Gosh, you think? Give him here, please, I've been dying to hold him for days." Eren smiles as he sits up in bed and takes his son, gently cradling his head in his hand with the other stretched under his back for a stable base. "Ah, there's my little guy.” He chuckles as he brings him closer to plant a kiss on his forehead. The baby reaches up to touch his father's nose and his smile, all while maintaining a still expression like he's utterly fascinated. "Wow, I sure missed you." He smiles and kisses the baby's fingertips as they feel across his lips, taking in all of his facial features.

"I love to watch you with him," Mikasa smiles as she climbs into bed beside her boyfriend and their son plays with one of his fingers. It's clearly too large for him to hold since he needs to use both tiny hands, but Hannes could care less based on that wide grin. "You're such a great Daddy."

"Loving him is easy. Hannes is both of us and I think that's pretty incredible."

"I always like to think that he has an angel on his shoulder watching over him. You know what I mean?"

"Yeah, I do. I like that." Eren turns to her and gives a smile that would have been bigger if her eyes weren't tearing up. The only good thing that comes from situations like these is how beautiful her eyes become, more so than they are already. That incredible man meant a lot to both of them, so his brutal death was particularly horrific. "Big Hannes. One hell of a guardian angel, that's for sure." They smile as they lean in to share a sweet, comforting kiss and their baby coos joyfully in his father's arms. "I'm absolutely crazy about you, you know." He smiles as she lovingly rubs the tip of her nose against his and gives a gentle, playful pull on his son's hands with the finger they continue to squeeze. His thumb lightly rubs over the top of his tiny hands and the young man frowns at the soft sniffles coming from his girl.

"Well, I've been crazy about you longer." She giggles as he crashes his lips crash against hers and runs her thumb over the dimple on his cheek.

"I don’t know about that, but I'm pretty sure I hid it better. Apparently everyone except for me knew that you were into me."

"You're the most handsome, oblivious human being I've ever met." Mikasa smile as they turn their attention down to the baby, who has adorably stuffed his tiny fist into his mouth. Surly if he were a few weeks older he would be gracing them with fits of laughter based on that familiar, playful expression that leads to everyone seeing his toothless grin so often. She watches in high amusement as her boyfriend carefully lays their baby on the bed and tickles his stomach. The little boy removes his fist from his mouth to give a wide, gummy grin that made both of his parents laugh. "He's so cute that I'm actually crying."

"I can't get enough of him. God, he smiles like you. Did you know that, Hannes? You smile just like your mommy." Eren laughs as he lightly tickles under the baby's chin with his fingertip, then gives his nose a gentle poke. "You even have her cute little nose." He smiles as she buries her face in the crook of his neck and a dainty hand slides around the width of his bicep. The dainty hands that have killed for him and the sake of humanity, for the chance to have a moment just like this.

"Goodness, you literally have not stopped flirting with me since you got home..." Mikasa grins as she presses her lips to his tanned cheek.

"I haven't been home for three days, babe."

"What, you're playing catch up are you?"

"Basically." He looks into her eyes with a dreamy smile and her heart flutters the way it always does.

"You're the worst..."

"I love you too." The way he laughs tells her that she's never seen him this content, at least not in a very long time. His energy couldnt feel more bubbly nowadays, which coincidentally began when their relationship was finally allowed to blossom and peaked the day that Hannes was born. "Do you have any idea how much daddy worried about you while he was gone?" Eren smiles as he gently rubs his thumb over the top of his son's hands and receives an impressive grip on his finger. "That's right, I lost count how many times I had to reassure myself that you and mommy were perfectly safe."

"We managed while daddy was away, huh, Hannes?" Mikasa giggles as she watches Eren's fingers gently tickle over the baby's stomach, making him squeal loudly in merriment. A different sound that the young parents haven't heard but a few other times before. They look to each other in shock, and one smiles wide as she pats the other's shoulder excitedly. "W-was that it?! Did he?!"

"He's so close! Come on little guy!" Eren smiles as he gentle tickles once again, making the baby react in the same adorable way. "Drastic times call for drastic measures. It always works to get you laughing, so, I wonder..." He says as he pushes the baby's shirt over his plump little belly and leans down to gently blow on his stomach. That did it. The baby immediately bursts into hysterical giggles and squeals with excitement once more as his ecstatic mother wipes away her tears of pure joy. Eren laughs as the baby continues giggling and playfully flails his little limbs excitedly. He sits up to look into those tiny eyes and smiles as his girl lovingly dusts the fuzzy chocolate hairs from the their son's face.

"Oh, my precious baby!" Mikasa smiles as leans down to give repeated kisses to his chubby cheek, making the baby giggle enthusiastically in response. "Heh, now that he's figured out how to laugh, we're gonna get to hear it all the time. I'm so excited!" She says in a way that makes the baby smile and the couple laugh together as he presses a kiss to her cheek, carefully resting his chin on her shoulder. "Oh, you are just too cute!"

"He really is." Eren smiles as he wraps his arm around her waist and touches the other to the baby's cheek. He gives a playful, gentle pinch and is rewarded with an adorable giggle and matching toothless grin. "Thank you for braving through that horrific pain for us to have him."

"Horrific pain is an understatement. I thought my shattered rib cage was the worst pain ever but it's definitely worth it."

"So, you would consider...?"

"Having another baby?" Mikasa smiles as she gently pokes the tip of her son's nose and the young couple laugh at the sound of his contagious giggles. She kisses his little cheek and pulls away to look into those dazzling emeralds that perfectly resemble his father's eyes. The baby boy grins as he flails his arms and legs happily, making them poor over their coos of joy. "Heh, let's just enjoy him for a little longer."

"I'm not saying that I wanted to right now, silly girl. I was thinking we could start trying when he turns one, if you were okay with that of course."

"Alright," She agrees enthusiastically as she turns to meet his gaze with an adorable smile and blushes lightly at his dreamy smirk. "I'd be okay with that. Can you handle me being pregnant again?"

"Oh, good point.." He says to her in a way that clearly conveys he's teasing and smiles as she kisses him on the lips. "Mikasa, you literally aren't any different than you are normally when you're pregnant. Just maybe slightly more moody, but only if I haven't fed you in at least an hour."

"Really?"

"Seriously. So, stop worrying about that. Besides, if anything like the times you couldn't control your tears happens again, I have no problem holding my girl." He lovingly tightens his arm around her waist and kisses the side of her neck as he smoothes his hand over the baby's belly. Eren chuckles to himself when he feels tiny hands playing with his fingers and looks up with a smile. "What are you doing, Hannes? Hm?" The baby grins as he studies his father's eyes and sleepily blinks his tiny eyelids.

"I love hearing you call me your girl. It’s still so surreal.” She smiles as she watches him gingerly slide a hand under the baby's head and low back to lift him off the bed. He adjusts him carefully in his arms as he rises out of bed and cradles the boy safely against his solid form. Mikasa sits up and brings her knees up to her chest as she watches him with their little boy. He’s a natural. "It's attractive how great you are with children, you know..."

"Watch it." He smirks and shifts his focus down to the baby as he carefully supports the back of his head in his hand. This is what Eren always does when they've been struggling with getting Hannes to sleep. They aren't even sure why it works so well when he clearly doesn't have a favorite. But it's something he loves to do, to cradle the baby safely in his arms as he slowly rocks from side to side. Since the baby's face is resting in his father's direction, Eren could hear those soft whimpers of retaliation because he'd much rather be awake socializing with his parents. "It's alright, buddy. Daddy's gotcha." He frowns as he kisses the tears from his son’s rosy cheek and glances up to meet Mikasa's loving gaze. They share a smile as she rests her chin on her arms and watches his paternal side come out, gradually gaining control of the little cries their baby whimpers. Eren makes careful movements with the baby in his arms until he was cradled against his father's chest somewhat unhappily, though that's only because he doesn't want to fall asleep yet. The young man tilts his arm up carefully to plant a soft kiss to his son's forehead as he continues to soothe him to sleep. It's surprising to the couple that it seems to be working so quickly today, since within a few minutes of that first tiny cry of retaliation, Hannes's eyelids were fluttering shut once more.

"My hero..." She whispers and grins when he playfully rolls his eyes.

"Why don't you try and get some rest?"

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I got this. Seriously, I don't want to see those beautiful eyes again for at least an hour and that's an order."

"Yes, Captain Jaeger." Mikasa smiles as she reclines back in bed and cuddles with her pillow. She watches him through sleepy eyes as a grin plasters on that handsome face and he slowly sways from side to side. His attention flickers between his two greatest loves and he smiles at the baby's sigh of content. It was clear from how Hannes struggles to keep his eyes open that it wouldn't be long now until he'll fall asleep once more and give his father a much needed cuddle session. He glances over his shoulder to see that Mikasa had finally given in to fatigue, just like their little one.

"You two are so much alike already." Eren whispers to his son and smiles as he slowly wanders over to the rocking chair in the corner of the bedroom. He takes care when he sits down as not to disturb the baby and grabs the blanket that was draped over the back of the chair so he could cover his legs, all the way up to the baby's chest. Hannes's eyes open momentarily and his father can see tears waiting to pool over from those litttle emeralds. He sniffles and sighs softly as his eyelids slowly flutter shut once more, his tiny hands moving up to rub his sleepy eyes. The young father smiles and carefully tucks the blanket under his son’s arms as he gets comfortable in the chair. After he double checks that the blanket is far enough from the baby's face, Eren finally allows himself to recline his head back and close his eyes. Having the privilege of raising a family with this woman is more than he ever could have asked for and he's truly looking forward to what the rest of their lives have in store for them. Their goal has always been to be outside the walls, but now that they have Hannes, such a journey would prove to be rather dangerous. He knows one thing for certain; that they'll always be home as long as they're together, Mikasa, himself, and their adorable baby boy.

96 notes · View notes