It's so annoying, eating-disorder brain. Anytime I'm having a conversation with someone over a meal. there's another conversation happening internally—judgments and criticisms and self-loathing that press on me with such severity. They're a brutal distraction. I can never be present with whoever I'm with. My focus is always more on the food than the person.

Jennette McCurdy, I’m Glad My Mom Died

TO BE HAPPY IN SUMMER, YOU HAVE TO SUFFER IN WINTER!

gente vo parar ds conversar com meu pai ele me engatilha muito💔💔💔 a gente tava conversando sobre o padrão ds beleza da coreia do sul e eu disse pra ele que tinha algumas idols que tinham 1,70 e pesavam 45kg e adivinha oq ele disse.... "vo te mandar pra coreia por uns 3 meses também pra ver se tu emagrece igual elas kkkkkkkkkkkk" ...........................deus me ajuda

I literally only have to lose 0,3kg a day to reach my gw by the end of the month. I need to do this. I will do this.

It starts small, inconsequential really. But Roy, he knows the signs, this isn't his first rodeo, as Ted would say. That thought makes him curse beneath his breath. Sounds like something fucking Lasso would say. It makes Roy's blood boil a little. He hates that the fucking cowboy coach has gotten into his head. But the point is, Roy notices. It's small but its there. Roy notices the way Jamie tips back the protein shaker, as he stands in the locker room laughing with the boys, but the liquid inside doesn't actually seem to go down. He notices the way Jamie's hands sometimes tremble as he picks up his water bottle in the gym. Having pushed himself harder then any of the rest of them. He notices the way Jamie jots down notes in a little pocket notebook at lunch. Roy doesn't see what's in it, but he'd bet his championship trophy its that stats of whatever Jamie's eating at lunch. Its not new. Everyone has macros to track, protein goals to reach. Carefully controlled carb intakes, but there's a darkness to Jamie's eyes as he scribbles hastily in his little notebook. Roy knows that look, and a part of him wants to look away, pretend he didn't see it, pretend he doesn't know the signs for what they are. He looks around the room, everyone is eating and laughing, they don't see what Roy is seeing. Most of them barely even spare Jamie a glance. Fuck. Fucking fuckity fuck it. It has to be Roy, it can't be anyone fucking else.

the fact that doctors can just Recommend Weight Loss with no instructions beyond ‘eat healthier/less’ is actually insane to me, i lost weight on purpose ONCE and it took me like 6 years to recover a semi-normal relationship with food and hunger

Unpopular opinion ed addition: cucumbers aren’t that great 😬😩

REMINDER THAT YOU CAN ACTUALLY CALCULATE CALS JUST BY ASKING SNAP AI ‼️‼️

eu to aqui conversando com meu pai né e eu solto que tava ansiosa pra Páscoa chegar pra comer um ovo de chocolate e ele me diz "lembra quando vc tinha 9 anos e eu te dei um ovo e sua mãe brigou que só comigo pq vc tava gordinha e eu ainda continuava te dando mais chocolate??🤣🤣😂😂 eu tinha dito que ia te dar seu próximo ovo só quando vc emagrecesse mas como vc nunca emgraceu nunca te dei kkk melhor pra mim que economizei" pqp cara quis morrer nessa hora

I really wish there was more insight as to why children are "picky eaters" because the way people go about "fixing us" can be detrimental to our relationship with food.

When I was a kid, I was obviously neurodivergent, and I wasn't tested for anything and never received any support. I was a huge "picky eater" to the point that going to a new restaurant with a menu I didn't know would send me into panic mode. I didn't understand why I felt that way, I didn't understand that I wasn't a selfish, horrible kid for being unable to force myself to eat. I'd be the person sitting at the dining room table for hours because I just couldn't force myself to eat the food I was given.

I understand why parents do that. It can be concerning when you think your kid isn't getting the proper nutrition. It's concerning when a kid's pallete is overly shrunk down. But if you're going about it in a punishing way, you only reinforce the idea that food is bad and dangerous. And if a child knows that eating their food would cause them less grief and stress than not eating the food, and yet they still will not or cannot eat, that's a sign. Maybe work with children, try to understand why they're a "picky eater." Chances are they're not doing it because they personally want to spite you and they despise your very aura.

I just got this book and I simply was not prepared for how thoroughly the first fucking page would take me out, jesus christ man

(from Unmasking Autism by Devon Price)

You try to go against Ana and she’ll put you on your fxcking ass.

Reading wintergirls to purposely trigger my ed

(so far it's kinda working)

queria uma amiga anorexica na vida real

Evie likes to count her ribs. It’s soothing. She’ll run her fingers down her left side first, feeling carefully from top to bottom before moving on to her right. She’ll dig her fingers into each divot, hook them underneath her rib cage as she sucks in a breath. It’s her morning ritual. Before taking a shower but after her first weigh in of the day. And at night, in the quiet moonlight that sneaks its way through their room's tiny bathroom window, Evie measures herself. She hides the tape measure with her skincare, which she keeps neatly organized in a bin that Mal never touches. She begins with her arms, then her waist, then her hips, and always ends with her thighs. It’s something her mother taught her how to do. They used to do it together, her mom standing by her side as they measured themselves in tandem. They would stand in front of their bathroom mirror, which had a crack in it that split it into two. Sometimes, Evie would line herself up with the fissure, watch as it made her face go wonky. She was uneven and disassembled, just like her insides.

Doing the nightly ritual without her mother is lonely. Evie is almost tempted to invite Mal to join her. She thinks that Mal could keep her on track - the way her mother did - make sure that Evie stays slim and perfectly princess-esque. She thinks that Mal would be kind about it. Unlike her mother, swinging like a pendulum, simultaneously angry when Evie was fatter than her and then even more angry when Evie was thinner than her. But Evie knows that Mal would disapprove. Mal would narrow her eyes, grab her by her wrist and show Evie just how easily her thumb and pinkie wraps around it. Unbearably tiny. She’s done it before. Like back when they were on the Isle and Evie would refuse to eat her share of the rations. Mal does it here too. She'll hold Evie's wrist underneath the cafeteria table whenever Evie is merely moving her food around and not actually eating it. Mal is kind like that. And even if others might think of Mal's grip as too tight, Evie knows better. Mal's touch is the only thing preventing the rot.

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a descendants wip for my series. i've been working on this since february, which ik isn't actually that long ago but i've been stuck ever since, which is soooooo :(((((