#dog!faunus jaune
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Yang: You guys wanna go get some d-e-s-s-e-r-t?
Ruby: Yeah dude! I need me a t-r-e-a-t?
Dog!Jaune: What're you guys talkin' about?
Blake: Yeah why did you guys just spell desser-
Ruby: Shut up don't say it!
Yang: Shh!
Blake: Uh, why?
Ruby: Oh God. How do we tell you this?
Yang: Jaune... Can't spell.
Blake: ...What?
Ruby: He can't spell. So when we talk about something he wants we spell it out loud so he doesn't get too excited.
Blake: He's a grown man! He can't handle hearing the word 'treat'?
Jaune, tail wagging: Treat?
Yang: No treat!
Jaune: Treat?
Yang: No treat!
Jaune: Treat?
Yang: No treat!
Jaune, ears drooping: Awww...
Blake: Okay, what is happening?
Yang: We told you! He gets excited when he hears the word t-r-e-a-t.
Jaune: Whatcha talkin' about?
Yang: Taxes
Jaune: Aw shucks!
Blake: So you guys just treat him like a toddler?
Jaune: Treat?
Ruby: No treat!
Jaune: Treat?
Ruby: No treat!
Jaune: Awwww...
Ruby: Dude, you gotta spell if you're talking about f-o-o-d.
Blake: Okay, so... Are we getting an s-n-a-c-k?
Jaune: Snack?
Ruby: Oh come on.
Yang: Dude, really?
Blake: Oh come on. I spelled it!
Ruby: Well he knows how to spell snack.
Blake: So he can spell snack, but he can't spell treat?
Jaune: Treat?
Blake: No treat!
Jaune: Treat?
Blake: No treat!
Jaune: Treat?
Blake: NO TREAT!
Jaune: God dammit!
Yang: Okay, he's getting fussy. Time for an n-a-p.
Jaune: Yeah!
Blake: What does n-a-p spell?
Jaune: Party!
#rwby#rwby shitpost#yang xiao long#ruby rose#jaune arc#blake belladonna#lancaster#rwby dragonslayer#sunlit knight#dog!faunus jaune#wolf!faunus ruby#wolf!faunus yang
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Bandit: *Breaking into Jaune's house*
Dog Jaune: Oh boy! New friend!
Bandit: Umm-
Jaune: Do you want to play a game?
Bandit: ...Sure.
Jaune: Okay, this is one my friend Nora likes a lot. It's called "get out of my house or I'm going to break both of your legs"
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Nora: Does anyone here know how to work an MRI machine?
Jaune: I can't but I bet Blake could.
Blake: What? Why do you think I could?
Jaune: Because when it comes to running an MRI Dogs can't, but Catscan.
Blake: ...
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NOT A DOG PERSON
Yang: “I just don’t get it!”
Blake: *Reading on her bed* “What do you mean?”
Yang: “Just last month you couldn’t even stand being in the same room as Zwei, but now you’re dating Jaune like it’s no big deal. I didn’t take you for a dog person.”
Blake: “I wouldn’t say I am a dog person. Although…”
Yang: “What is it?”
Blake: “I believe I have grown quite accustomed to certain habits similar as of dog-owners.”
Yang: “Wait, really? Like what?”
Blake: “Here, let me show you.” *Reaches for something under her bed*
Yang: “Blake, I swear. If it’s a leash, I’m moving out with Ruby by tomorrow.”
Blake: *Pulls out a box of Pumpkin Pete’s* “What leash?”
Yang: “Is that Jaune’s cereal? Why do you have-”
Blake: *Rips it open*
*SNEAKERS SOUNDS INTENSIFIES*
Jaune: *Barges in, tail waggling* “Hiya Blake! I heard snacks! Do you have snacks?!”
Blake: “Maybe later.” *Puts box down* “But now that you are here, I do need to ask you for a favor.”
Jaune: *Overly excited* “What is it?! What is it?!”
Blake: “You see, I was just getting to this really good part in my book, but the bed is a tad too cold for my liking…”
Jaune: “ON IT!” *Jumps onto her bed and sits by the headboard*
Blake: *Lays her head on his chest as she continues to read while caressing his cheek with her free hand* “Good boy.”
Jaune: *Happily snoozes under her care*
Yang: “Huh… This is oddly wholesome-”
Blake: “Oh. Before I forget, we do have a leash.”
Yang: “I KNEW IT!”
Blake: “He is not the one who wears it.”
Yang: *Bolts out of the room* “Ruby! Pack up your stuff!”
#rwby#jaune arc#blake belladonna#knightshade#jaune x blake#Dog-Faunus!Jaune#yang xiao long#dog!faunus jaune
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Penny: Over the last year, Good-Boyfriend-Jaune and I have spent overt 1500 hours testing to make sure my rear is the most humpable rear end possible.
Weiss: ...So you had sex for over 4 hours every day for a whole year?
Penny: Precisely. Do you have any more questions?
Weiss: ...Would you be willing to share?
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Jaune: (Dog Faunus) My god, you are cringe.
Ruby: (Wolf Faunus) I might be cringe.
Jaune: ...Is there more to that statement?
Ruby: Mm... No. No, not really.
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Yang: *Chatting with Weiss*
Ruby: *Runs into room* Yang! Yang! You've got to see this funny faunus trait Jaune has!
Yang: *Shoo's her away* Now now Ruby, the adults are having a conversation.
Ruby: Suit yourself. *Shrugs and runs off*
Yang: So like I was saying...
Ruby: *From other room* Red rocket! Red rocket Jaune!
Yang: *Sudden realization before immediately leaving* Ruby no!
Weiss: ...
Weiss: Am I not allowed to have a relatively normal day?
#rwby#yang xiao long#ruby rose#weiss schnee#jaune arc#lancaster#ruby x jaune#dog!faunus jaune#rwby shitpost#south park
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Have you ever thought about an au where Jaune is a wolf faunus and Ruby is a dog faunus?
When I look back, Jaune may have the appearance of a dog, but acts more like a wolf. I mean, he's the only one in the group who goes for a kill blow when an enemy is down.
Ruby has the appearance of a wolf, but she acts more like a dog. Being a silver eyed warrior, she is meant to preserve life. The worst she's done to a person was cut off Tyrian's tail.
If you did make this AU, I can see the relationship being that Ruby playfully dominates Jaune.
The Pupper and Woofy.
Wolf Jaune: I'm on a hunt. I'm hunter, a proud warrior like my father and his before me and I have my prey on sight...
Sheep Cruz: Baaaa..... (Oh no. 💕I hope no handsome blonde wolf attack and ravish me from behind. That would be so bad if it happens. *giggle*😋)
Jaune: Target located, ready to pounce and... Strike.
Cruz: Oh No!!! I'm about to be eaten by the big bad dic..... I mean wolf! Whatever should I do? 🤤
Dog Ruby: Have no fear for I am here! Get to safety you dumb sheep I will gladly put myself in harm's way to safe you! Go ahead wolf. Eat me but please leave the dirty sheep alone!
Cruz: Tsch! (Get a clue you dumb bitch!)
Jaune: Ehh.... What is happening?
Ruby: You heard me. Eat me. Ravish me, devour me (sexually) with your mouth... (Then your dick afterward.)
Jaune: I think I better go...
Ruby: Oh no you don't! Get back here and finish me! Mama wanted her climax!!!
Jaune: *runs away*
Cruz: No!!!!
Ruby: My Wolf D!!!!
#rwby#jaune arc#ruby rose#lancaster#lancaster rwby#jaune x ruby#ruby x jaune#rwby lancaster#dog faunus ruby#wolf faunus jaune#jessica cruz#sheep faunus cruz#traffic knight#emerald knight
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Which camp are you in?
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Vacuum
Nora: "Hey Jaune-Jaune?"
Jaune's dog ears perk up, and he looks up from the sword fencing book he was studying to look at Nora.
Dog Faunus Jaune: "What's up Nora?"
Nora: "So, I know you tend to get scared during major thunderstorms, but do you get upset when someone uses a vacuum? and I'm only asking out of genuine concern, I swear!"
Jaune snickers at Nora's nervous look, before giving her a reassuring smile.
F! Jaune: "I knew what you meant Nora, and I'm not offended."
At this, Jaune tilts his head to the left as he thinks her question over.
F!: Jaune: "Mmmh the vacuum huh? I don't have to much of an issue with it to be honest. Most Canine Faunus don't really either, at best we get annoyed at the constant humming but other than that we tune it out."
Nora: "Great! Because I'm getting ready to run one real quick since it's been a couple weeks and I just wanted to make sure you're okay with it!"
Jaune waved her off with a go ahead as he went back to his book. Nora quickly set the Vacuum up and as she stepped on the pedal it roared to life. It was at this moment that the door to their dorm room was blown off it's hinges as one Ruby Rose bursts in holding Crescent Rose in her hands with a death grip. He wolf ears were twitching, her silver eyes filled with fear and panic as she started shouting.
Wolf Faunus Ruby: "WHO HAS ACTIVATED THE DEVILS INSTRUMENT?! THE HUMMING! THE MADDENING HUMMING! THEY FILL THE AIR WITH THEIR INUMANE SHRIEKING! MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP!"
At her mad ramblings, Ruby began to wildly fire into the room as she tried to snuff out vacuum from the safety of the doorway. She nearly caught Nora with a stray round before Jaune had dive tackled her to the floor and they both crawled behind the kitchen counter. Nora peaked out over the counter in terror, before looking at Jaune with questioning look. Jaune met her look with an indifferent look and a shrug.
F! Jaune: ""I did says that 'most' Canine get annoyed at 'best."
F! Ruby: "DIE MONSTER, FOR YOU DON'T BELONG IN THIS WORLD!"
#jaune arc#ruby rose#nora valkyrie#team jnpr#wolf faunus ruby#dog faunus jaune#rwby#humor#rwby shitpost#shitpost#vacuum
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Ruby: Sorry I'm late! I got stuck on Jaune's lap for an hour.
Yang: What, did you accidentally glue yourself to him?
Ruby: ...
Yang: I-it was glue, right?
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Jaune: Wait, so you're all faunus Versions of me?
Rabbit!Jaune: Seems like it!
Dog!Jaune: Yeah!
???Jaune: Mhm!
Jaune: Can you talk?
Jaune: *Nods*
Jaune: Well why aren't you?
Shark!faunus Jaune: Well those two-
Jaune: TEETH! RUN!
Jaune: *Skedaddling*
Jaune: Seem skittish.
Jaune: ... Well. Do you like fish?
Jaune: I love fish!
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Knock Knock
Blake: *Opens Door* Ruby?
Dog!Faunus Ruby: *Holding Several Pamphlets* Hi! Miss Belladonna, is it? So nice to meet you!
Blake: …Ruby, you live here. You already know who I am.
Ruby: You’re absolutely right! Let’s skip introductions, shall we? *Clears Throat* So, I’m going from door to door to see if anyone’s interested in becoming Jaune’s pet today.
Blake: Ruby, is this some sort of attempt of yours at starting a cult centered around Jaune? …Again?
Ruby: Amazing question, you’re such a good girl.
Blake: *Ear Twitches* Go on…
Ruby: So basically, you become Jaune’s lap-dog, or lap-cat in your case, and you get to enjoy all kinds of benefits!
Blake: Benefits?
Ruby: You get to sleep around him whenever you want, he takes you on walksies, helps clean your ears, feeds you…
Blake: He feeds you?
Ruby: Oh yeah! His strawberry shortcake is to die for, believe me. OH! Remember that fancy tuna dish our teams had at our last get-together?
Blake: *Profusely Sweats* Yes…?
Ruby: Jaune cooked it himself. Family recipe, he says.
Blake: *Licking her Lips* Wait, *Shakes Head* You don’t take issue over the fact that he will be spending time with me?
Ruby: I thought so too at first, but I soon realized that Jaune deserves all the love he can get! More so than lil’ ol’ me could ever provide. Besides, we are just friends!
Blake: Uh, hum… Look, I’m sure this is nice and all, but I will admit this is a little weird even for me. And considering the type of stuff I’m into, that is saying something. Sorry, but my answer is no. *Grabs Doorknob*
Ruby: WaitwaitWAIT!
Blake: …What?
Ruby: Head pats.
Blake: …H-Head pats?
Ruby: Every. Single. Day.
Blake: *Both Ears Twitch* …On second thought, I guess it wouldn’t hurt to try.
Ruby: Amazing! Now before you sign up, would you like to hear a few encouraging words of our sponsor, Mama Arc?
#rwby#rwby shitpost#ruby rose#blake belladonna#jaune arc#lancaster#knightshade#ruby x jaune#blake x jaune#dog!faunus ruby#cat!faunus blake#Isn't she already a cat Faunus?#Shut up
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Ruby: Penny's so cool!
Yang: Would you say She's got that dog in her?
Penny: Jaune and I are not fornicating currently?
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Jaune: I would hump you 500 times.
Jaune: And I would hump you 500 more times.
Jaune: Just to be the only faunus who... Umm.
Jaune: Honestly, I don't know where I was going with that.
Ruby: ...Are the humps still on the table?
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Ruby: Ah!
Jaune: AH!
Ruby: Ack! Geez, you're loud!
Jaune: MY BAD!
Ruby: Oh! Somebody in my chat just called you a chihuahua!
Jaune: !
Ruby: Do you have some choice words for them?
Jaune: SUCK MY DICK!
Jaune: I wanted to be so friendly on this stream and wholesome and family friendly, but with assholes like you? Suck my dick!
Jaune: "Whip it out!"
Jaune: Whoa, whoa! Hold on a second! I didn't think you'd actually do it! Get out- GET OFF OF ME!
Ruby: He showed you yours now we must show him ours!
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