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#didn’t want to deal with the consequences of everything he did
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☕️the most egregious problem The Flash has is that it literally NEVER ADDRESSES ANY of the trauma it consistently puts Barry and co through, like it has other problems but I think that's the worst lol
1000000% and I will die mad about it.
Since it’s (always) on my mind, let’s take season 2 for example shall we?
If I had a nickel for everytime Post-Zoom-trauma just disappeared at the drop of a hat, I’d have four nickels. Which isn’t a lot, but it’s fucking INFURIATING THAT IT HAPPENED F O U R TIMES
The four (for lack of a better word) victims in question: Caitlin, Barry, Jesse, and Jay.
Caitlin: kidnapped and held against her will for (I believe) two weeks (that’s putting it simply but we’ve all seen the show so🤷‍♀️). The show gives her one single episode to deal with it, during which she shows very real symptoms of PTSD— solved and therefore ignored and glossed over entirely with a single pep talk. I would also like to add that she showed NO fear of him in the season finale which makes no fucking sense with what the show established only an episode earlier. But tbh, this is the best one because at least the show ACKNOWLEDGED that trauma; if only for one episode.
Barry: Back broken during first encounter (among other severe injuries), humiliated by being dragged around the city to show he wasn’t strong enough to stop Zoom, confidence shattered from the experience. Like Caitlin, we got one episode to deal with this trauma and in that episode, Barry also showed signs and symptoms of PTSD (the entire season is evidence tbh). But of course, one pep talk from his dad and everything’s magically ok :-D !!!!!! I’m going to eat glass (also I will definitely make a post on that fucking episode because I hate it). As mentioned; he continues to have PTSD symptoms throughout the season but it’s glossed over so much and attributed to generic-superhero-stuff™️ that it really doesn’t matter. Gods, I could go on all day about Barry’s post-Zoom AND post-Thawne trauma. (Oh, he was also kidnapped, threatened, and {borderline} tortured by Zoom in the Earth-2 episodes; but that’s all normal superhero stuff ofc so it doesn’t matter right :-D !!! gnawing at the bars of my enclosure)
Jesse: Good gods where do I even start. Kidnapped by a known serial killer, tortured by said serial killer, repeatedly and (probably) constantly threatened with death, and held captive for around 9-10 months. Mm also, she was clearly terrified of Zoom every time he showed up prior to her rescue. Sounds like an extremely traumatic experience with multiple opportunities and instances to develop PTSD right? WRONG! According to the lovely writers; people are completely fine after a traumatic experience is over! What’s PTSD??? chewing glass chewing glass chewing glass. They didn’t even TRY with her, at least with Barry and Caitlin they pretended to give a shit about what they went through but Jesse makes two things crystal clear. 1) The writers don’t care about your trauma unless you’re an MC. 2) The writers put minimal effort into trauma if any; MC or not. It’s like they said ‘Ooo, we should have Caitlin kidnapped by Zoom!’ ‘Won’t that have some sort of effect on her? Being kidnapped is a terrifying experience’ ‘Ah fuck you’re right… eh, we’ll give her one episode ig’ ‘What about Jesse?’ ‘Who?’
Jay: Fucking. Hell. I ordered this in what I consider best handled to worst. Jay is by far— handled worst. Let’s see here *checks notes* Ah yes. Kidnapped and taken to a completely different Earth, an attempted theft of his powers, imprisoned and put in a mask so he can’t speak, {not confirmed but very likely with Zoom’s track record and somewhat implied} tortured, had his identity stolen and {likely} mocked and tormented about the subject, and the ~delightful~ cherry on top— held captive in this situation for at least one year. Fuck I’m so tired. Anyways; there’s not much to say. He got rescued (off-screen ofc), was able to access his powers instantly with no problems, and left to go back to his Earth. Trauma? What trauma? *gestures wildly at said trauma posted above* That’s not traumatic at all! *screams* I don’t care how much experience you have as a superhero— that doesn’t just GO AWAY! PTSD, FLASH WRITERS. LOOK INTO IT P L E A S E fuck I just remembered the show is over now ALL YOUR MC’S HAVE IT! EVERY. SINGLE. ONE. Sigh. In the end of *gestures at said trauma* all that, Jay was just used to cause Barry more greif from his father’s death. Obviously he gets roles in later seasons but (as far as I can remember) this whole thing was never brought up again. Sigh.
I COULD GO ON
I COULD GO ON FOR DAYS
but I won’t cause dear gods I’ve been typing forever now
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padfootastic · 1 year
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Ahaha thank you for the nice comments in tags <3 i love Remus but he seems bit like a spineless people pleaser and after dating somebody who would rather lie about their feelings than have people be mildly upset with them..... I chose violence 🗡
no but ur so right because!!! i’ve been sleeping on this for a while but let’s talk about remus’ personality traits and how they have the potential to make him a bad/absent partner, at best, and an abusive one, at worst. everyone wants to turn him into this image of perfection just bc he’s such an ‘uwu victim’ figure in fanon but that’s SO far from the truth omg
(i am…just gonna put this remus character analysis under a cut bc it got unnecessarily long and i wouldn’t want u to read it if u didn’t want to lol)
so, for one, he’s manipulative. he has no combinations in twisting the truth or dodging it entirely for his own benefit. like, the man could stand in front of his dead best friend’s orphaned son & not even allude to the fact that he knew his dad. he had no problem bringing james & lily up in the most twisted ways possible to guilt/emotionally influence harry. so remus in a relationship would have the capacity to either knowingly or unknowingly manipulate his partner. the definition of gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss except more sinister.
next, his spinelessness. either as a defensive measure to deal w anti-werewolf hostility or as an innate personality trait, remus has the habit of just—not standing up for things. he looks away when his friends act like assholes, even when he’s in a position of authority (which yes, u can argue that he’s afraid of losing them but atp they’ve literally risked life & magic & azkaban for him so either way, he comes off badly—either he doesn’t mind himself, or he doesn’t fully trust their friendship, or it’s just easier to look away). in a relationship, this can manifest as bottling everything inside u until it makes u bitter or u violently unload on the other person in an entirely disproportionate manner. the dynamic would also be a bit skewed. the people pleasing u mentioned is also such a big thing that people usually overlook. when ur constantly trying to make the other person happy and don’t want to rock the boat, that is a cocktail for miscommunication and breakdown of relationships. ur also constantly putting the emotional burden of constructively dealing w issues on ur partner instead of doing it urself.
connected to his cowardice is his habit of running away when things get tough. remus is conflict avoidant; he does not like to put himself in a position where he has to take a decisive stance, especially if it’s against what others around him believe in. he runs away when things get tough, and tbh, for me, this comes from a constant spiral of self hatred & self victimisation, both of which stem from his experience as a werewolf. in every difficult situation, he centres himself & his discomfort and instead of dealing with it and moving forward for a constructive solution, he decides that stepping back from it altogether is better. which, yeah, works well for him bc he can temporarily put a pin in it but it’s kinda terrible for everyone’s who’s left behind. so i also think that remus is a profoundly selfish character who doesn’t look beyond the end of his own nose. u can imagine how those traits might manifest themselves in a relationship.
and his people pleasing!! so this might be verging on fanon but his gratitude and/or devotion to dumbledore sets an…interesting tone. it’s also another example of how he cannot conceive himself in any other term except as a victimised werewolf. the marauders did a lot for him, arguably even more than dumbledore’s token representation formula, but he never felt indebted to them the way he did for D. dumbledore also kind of makes him feel needed? validates his feelings? and that just speaks to a very twisted sense of self for me. which, again, won’t bode well for his other interpersonal relations.
also, on a very hc note, i also feel like remus just…does not have any significant capacity to love. he takes and takes and takes but doesn’t give much in return. this doesn’t even have to be an actively malicious decision, tbh, just a very self-centred one. he doesn’t realise how much he’s taking bc he’s only thinking about his own circumstances.
all of these are also just why i can’t see r/s working out in any healthy manner. remus is exactly antithetical to everything sirius is/believes in, and not even in the fun ‘opposites attract’ way. but that’s another rant no one asked for lmao
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agentravensong · 2 years
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I like to imagine the Employee 432 - Stanley dynamic as being the Kaycee Hobbes - Luke Carder dynamic, except you take the one encounter Kaycee and Luke had at that card game convention and expand it out to 8.8 years of working almost next door to each other
The only way I can explain it is with these tags of mine from when I first learned of the new “Kaycee and Luke met before she died” lore:
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pawnshopbleus · 5 months
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On Top
Young!Coriolanus Snow x Fem!Plinth!Reader
Warnings - Smut, Penis in vagina sex, Cunnilingus, Squirting, Abortion is mentioned once, Angst with a happy ending. Not beta read :0
Authors Note - I think this is the first time I’ve written p in v sex so please bear with me.
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Standing in front of the door to the Snow residence, you made sure you had everything. The basket you brought over for Coriolanus and his family was filled with food, gifts, and roses for Grandma’am. You wanted to celebrate Coriolanus’s historic win in this year's Hunger Games. Well, Lucy Grey won, but she wouldn’t have done without your Coriolanus. 
Your knuckles tapped the door three times and you patently waited until the door opened to reveal Grandma’am’s signature snow-white hair. She smiled at you and embraced you. She stepped aside and let you enter the home you had become so familiar with over the years. 
“Grandma’am, I wanted to bring this little gift for Coriolanus’s big win. The flowers are for you, by the way,” you winked and placed the basket on the table. “Speaking of, where might he be.” 
Grandma’am's eyes softened at your comment. “He’s with the dean,” she said, “He will be here any moment. You can wait for him in his room if you’d like.” Grandma’am rushed over to examine a particularly pretty white rose. 
You sat on Coriolanus’s bed tracing hearts on his pillow for what seemed like hours before his door opened. He looked frantic as if someone found out something they weren’t supposed to find.
“Come on, Coryo, you’re supposed to be smiling. Lucy Grey won. Aren’t you happy?” 
“I cheated,” he sighed. 
Your heart stopped. He what? Never in a million years did you think that he would do such a thing. With strong women like Tigris and Grandma’am raising him, you would have thought that he had the decency to break up with a woman before he did that.
Coriolanus shook his head as soon as he realized that you might have been taking his comment in the wrong way. “I cheated in the games. Not on you. I would never do that.” 
Your body relaxed and then it shot back up again. “Wait, what do you mean you cheated in the games? Is that even possible?”
Coriolanus explained what he did in order to get Lucy Grey to win. The compact mirror that used to belong to his mother had been packed with rat poison, poisonous to anyone who came in contact with it. He also put his father's handkerchief which was covered in Lucy Grey's scent in the snake's cage. If the snakes were familiar with her scent then they wouldn’t kill her. So it wasn’t her singing that saved her, it was Coriolanus. 
“What are they going to do to you?” Your eyebrows scrunched together with worry. You couldn’t lose Coriolanus for his stupid, yet chivalrous actions. 
“I don’t know yet. I don’t want to think about the future. Right now, I want to live in the moment with the prettiest girl in all of Panem.” Coriolanus smiled at how your face heated up so quickly, but deep down he was hurting. He knew what his punishment was. Twenty years of service as a peacekeeper in the Districts. He would leave the Capital and everything he’s known since he was a baby. That he could deal with, but losing you would be the hardest thing he would have to deal with. 
He knew that you would run to your father and beg him to get Coriolanus out of serving, but he didn’t want you over-exhausting your father's resources. He was a big boy and he needed to learn how to deal with his consequences. He would be fine. After all, Snow lands on top.  
He wanted to live in this moment with you. He wanted to memorize every inch of your body. He wanted to hold onto that memory and make it last. 
Your smile calmed him. “Can I kiss you?” he asked, eyes focused on your lips.
You nodded your head and smiled into the kiss. It was soft and sensual, vastly different from the kisses that the two of you usually share. Your lips brushed together as your bodies got closer to each other. By the time the two of you broke apart, you were under him, his forearms caging you underneath him. There was no need for him to do that. This is where you wanted to be, with Coriolanus. The toxic and tyrannical world that you lived in was long forgotten as she swooped in for another kiss. 
His lips traveled down to your cheek, then your jaw, and settled on your neck. He spent the majority of his time kissing and nibbling at the skin on your neck. There would be pretty little marks on your skin later, reminding people that you belonged to him. Coriolanus doesn’t remember when he got this territorial, but he sure loved the fact that Strabo Plinth’s beautiful daughter was his girlfriend. His girlfriend to mark and fuck and love whenever he wanted (with your consent of course.) 
You laughed as Coriolanus licked the sensitive patches of skin that he nibbled raw. “My parents are going to kill me when they see what you’ve done.” 
Coriolanus kissed your lips one more time in response to your comment. He then resumed his exploration of your body. His hands traveled down to the hem of your shirt, lifting it up to reveal the bra that he unclasped in less than five seconds. He threw it on the floor of his bedroom, letting it get hooked onto the pile of books in the corner. 
Coriolanus kissed in between the valley of your breasts. He flicked his tongue over your sensitive nipples. It was cold in the Capital of Panem and unfortunately, the Snow’s didn’t have indoor heating. Maybe it was because they didn’t want to melt. 
You sighed in pleasure as Coriolanus continued to explore your breasts. After five minutes of teasing, he began to travel south to the part where you needed him the most. He hooked his fingers into the belt loops of your pants, “may I?” 
You nodded, “Ever the gentleman.”
With your permission, he ripped your pants off of you and threw them on the floor. They were lost in the pile of clothing that had gathered on the floor. Coriolanus had shed some of his clothing as well. His ripped body was adorned in nothing but his white underwear. 
Coriolanus spread your legs apart, “Look at how wet my girl is.” He traced a finger down the cotton of your underwear and slowly slid it up your legs. He wanted to drag this on as much as possible. You let out a grumble of frustration, getting tired of his constant teasing. Coriolanus gave in and got rid of your underwear. 
The same finger that was used to skim the fabric of your underwear was now being used to gather your slick and spread it across your sensitive pussy. You took a deep breath of air into your lungs. The feeling was new, but not unwelcomed. Coriolanus flicked his tongue over your sensitive clit. Your clit was pulsing with need. You needed Coriolanus to drop the act and eat you out like he was a starving man.
“Coriol-” Your word was cut off by a moan as his mouth did exactly what you wanted it to do. Coriolanus delved into your pussy, tracing shapes onto your clit with his tongue. Your back arched off of the bed again. Coriolanus’s fingers teased your hole, trying to find the perfect time to ease into your channel. 
Coriolanus’s fingers weren’t thick, but they were long making it easier for him to tease your G-spot. He fucked his fingers in and out of you as he sucked your clit. You had to bite your lip in order to keep quiet. Your lips were sure to be chewed raw after this, but they would serve as a reminder that you had a man who was willing to do this for you. Many high-society women told stories about their husbands not pleasuring them when they had sex. It sounded like a horrible life to lead, but they were rich and beautiful so they needed to sacrifice something. 
Coriolanus curled his fingers up, letting them knock against your G-spot. He continued to kiss and lick at your clit. You were close. By the way you were clenching down on his fingers, he could tell that the waterworks were coming. Your naked chest rose and fell as you played with your nipples, increasing the pleasure that you felt. Your head fell even deeper into the pillow as a chill ran down your body. That chill eventually led to where Coriolanus was currently still working. He ate your pussy like a starved man, just the way you liked it. 
Without warning, your juices painted Coriolanus’s face. He wasn’t surprised that you came so fast. The last time you had sex was two months ago. You were burning for him and he was burning for you. 
Coriolanus wiped his face with the back of his hand and laughed. That was the first time he had actually made you squirt. It had always been a personal goal of his after Tirgis explained to Coriolanus how a woman's body works. At first, he was traumatized. He didn’t want to have the sex talk with his dear cousin, but when he laid eyes on you for the time, he wanted to do everything Tigris said and more. 
His cock was hard. You could see the outline of it through his white underwear. You would tease him about his tighty whities later. Right now, you were laser-focused on the fact that Coriolanus hooked his thumbs under his waistband and lowered them, exposing his cock to the cold air. His hard cock slapped against his lower stomach. He jerked his cock off, spreading his precum all over his length. He wanted to make sure that it went in as smoothly as possible. The last thing he wanted was to hurt you. 
He lined himself up at your core. He slid his tip up and down your pussy, gathering your slick with his dick before he pushed into you. Your insides welcomed him with little to no problem. The stretch felt good. You were all slicked up and ready for him.
Contraceptives weren’t a problem for you. Coriolanus was always careful and made sure to come somewhere that wasn’t your vagina. You didn’t want to have a kid just yet. First, you wanted to study at the University and travel back to District Two if you were given the chance. Then you wanted to get married. Pereferabbly to Coriolanus, but you didn’t know if that was possible yet. With his fate still undecided, your plans to marry the love of your life dwindled. Besides, even if you were to get pregnant your father would have enough money to get you an abortion
Coriolanus’s head fell forward as he buried his cock in your tight pussy. Two months and he had forgotten how good you felt. Your insides fluttered around him as he bottomed out. 
Coriolanus began to thrust his cock in and out of you. He was methodical with everything he did. Coriolanus set a rhythm as he fucked into you. He fucked you hard and fast. The side of his bed slapped against the wall and his mattress cracked and groaned as he fucked into you. You prayed to the heavens that Grandma’am and Tigris were in a deep sleep. Or that the walls of the Snow residence were thicker than Coriolanus’s cock. 
Coriolanus peppered your mouth with kisses in order to muffle your moans. He kept his pace as he did this. Your breasts jiggled as he fucked into you. Your hands found their way down to your extra-sensitive clit. You circled it with your fingers and moaned in pleasure at the feeling. 
His balls slapped against your ass as his strokes became more deep and labored. He was going to come soon. He needed to come soon. He couldn’t hold on much longer. Two months with no sex had gotten to him. “Fuck,” he said under his breath as your pussy clenched around him. “Where do you want it?” He asked, his voice was strained from trying to keep his composure. 
“Inside me,” you said. You were close too, the feeling of your finger frantically rubbing your clit and the feeling of Coriolanus's cock buried deep inside of you spurred your orgasm to come out from the woodwork.  
You have come a second time, your pussy fluttering and squeezing Coriolanus cock that was still inside of you. A string of curses fell from Coriolanus’s lips as he came inside of you. His pulsing and throbbing cock pushed his come deep inside of you as he continued to fuck you as he came. His thrusts were slow but intentional. He would have lasted a few more seconds, but with the way that your pussy squeezed his sensitive cock, he came instantly. 
Coriolanus slowly eased his cock out of you. The both of you were breathing heavily as Coriolanus went to grab a towel from his closet. He eased your legs open one more time as he cleaned you up. He was slow and gentle with it. He knew that you were still sensitive after two orgasms.
His come eased out of you and onto the towel. The sight almost caused him to get hard, but he didn’t feel like tiring you out even more. 
Once he was done cleaning you up, he tucked you into his chest and covered the two of you with the blankets on his bed. He kissed your forehead and your cheek. Coriolanus’s love language was kissing. He loved kissing you. He loved doing anything with you, but kissing was his favorite. 
Your eyes closed, but you weren’t falling asleep. Not yet. Sex might have been a clever distraction, but now that you were coming off your high you needed to know what will happen to the future of your relationship. 
“Coryo, what is going to happen to you? I know that you know what your punishment is. I'm not stupid.” 
Coriolanus sighed as he tried to keep his voice from waving. He rarely cried, but in moments like these, he did. Just you and him shielded away from the rest of the Capital were his favorite. “Twenty years as a peacekeeper.” 
You let out a shuddering breath as you tried not to cry. Your body ran cold as you repeated those words in your mind. Twenty years as a peacekeeper. Twenty years without your Coriolanus. Your Coryo. 
“My dad can-” 
“No,” Coriolanus said. “I don’t want your dad to get me out of this one. I need to learn how to do things on my own.”
“What if I had a crazy elaborate plan to get you out of it?”
“Nothing could be crazier than this.” Coriolanus got this crazy idea. It has been sitting in the back of his mind ever since you agreed to be his girlfriend. “Marry me?” 
This isn’t how he wanted to propose to you. He had already gotten your father's approval months ago. You were perfect for him and you deserve a perfect proposal. He wanted to take you to a fancy restaurant, get down on one knee, and ask you that way. Traditional and expected of Capital people, but things never go as planned when you’re a Snow. 
“Seriously?” You were in disbelief. Of course, you wanted to marry him, but this all seemed a bit rushed. “I mean, yes, I’ll marry you, but Coryo. You’re about to leave.” Then, your brilliant mind comes up with the perfect plan. 
You’ll marry Coriolanus, making him one of the heirs to the Plinth fortune. Thus making him more valuable to the Capital. This way you get to marry the love of your life and keep him within arms reach. Were you being possessive? Maybe, but it was better than the dean having to deal with an angry Plinth. 
And your plan worked. You and Coriolanus got married a week after he proposed to you. It was a bit rushed, but the two of you were ready. He was going to be a loving husband, and you, a loving wife. Coriolanus’s punishment would be reduced to two months of training in District Two. He would then return to the Capital as a peacekeeper. He would keep the peace during the day and return to you at night. 
Turns out Snow does land on top.
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Time to study up on straight people sex!
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yeonzzzn · 2 months
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consequences: sim jaeyun
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pairing: jake x afab!reader word count: 4.4k
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synopsis: folding your boyfriends laundry is a normal for you, mostly when his schedule is busy. so being the good girlfriend you are, you fold his laundry and stumble upon his soccer jersey, deciding to tease him with it and ultimately dealing with the consequences of your actions once he returns home.
genre: established relationship, non-idol!au, soccer player!jake, smut
warnings: swearing, sending nudes, bratty reader, masturbation, degrading, unprotected sex, dom!jake, jake rips readers panties, he is rough with reader, hair pulling, sex on the counter top, finger sucking, edging, MINORS DNI, lmk if I missed anything ♡
this is specially dedicated to @alvojake for helping me create this masterpiece ♡
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You let yourself into your boyfriend's apartment, finding the hidden spare key inside the fake potted plant by the door, and strolling on inside. You knew he didn’t mind, you practically lived here anyway, preferring his bed over the shitty one you had back at the dorms. You might as well just move in with him at this point, most of your clothes and belongings are here as well. 
Again, it was perfectly normal for you to randomly show up at his apartment even when he wasn’t home. Sending him a quick text letting him know you’re waiting for him to come home from work and soccer practice, to which he responds back with three heart-eye emojis. 
Jake is always working so hard, not just at his job and college, but also at his sport, and on top of being a great boyfriend and always making time for you within his busy schedule. Taking the “if they want to they will!!” to a whole other level. Jake spoils you, cooks for you, always makes sure you feel loved and cared and most of all, he communicates. 
And because he is always giving everything his one hundred percent in all areas, the least you could do is help keep his apartment clean, fridge and pantry stocked with food, and keep up with his laundry. 
Which is the first thing your eyes are laid upon when you walk into the apartment, seeing all his clothes tossed onto the couch with his clean clothes laundry basket sitting beside the coffee table. 
The apartment smelt of his laundry detergent and soap, the sweet smell of lavender and honey filling your senses as you stepped closer to the couch, on instinct sitting down in the middle of the couch and picking at the clothing one by one to fold them. Separating them into categories as you folded: jeans and sweatpants, boxers and socks, shirts, tanks, and sweatshirts, his hoodies, his dressier clothing, and last but not least, his soccer jerseys. 
Not only did Jake have a couple extra jerseys from the team he plays on for the college you both attended, but professional jerseys from his favorite teams. 
One by one, you took the now folded laundry to his bedroom, placing them neatly in his dresser. But once it was time for the jerseys to be played neatly in, you accidentally dropped one onto the floor. 
With a sigh, you gently pressed the other jerseys into the drawer, then picked up the now unfolded one. You stared at his last name printed in big bolded “SIM” lettering, your eyes roaming at the blue and white stripes of your college's colors, then wandering up to the full-length mirror that rested against his bedroom wall, seeing your reflection. 
You rubbed your thighs together at the thoughts that came into your mind, tucking your lip between your teeth. 
You didn’t think twice about removing your clothing, leaving you completely naked until you pulled his jersey over your head, your hard nipples poking through the thin fabric. 
Sitting yourself on the floor in front of the mirror, you snapped a few photos, spreading your legs wide enough to expose your cunt and sitting straight enough that your nipples could obviously be seen. You turned yourself around, sitting pretty on your legs, lifting his jersey up enough to get a perfect view of your ass, and snapped a couple more photos. 
You grinned at yourself as you double-checked each photo, being satisfied with the outcomes. All you had to do now was send them on their way to your boyfriend. 
Jake sat at his computer desk, picking the lint out of the pockets of his jeans while watching Heeseung and Jay play rock paper scissors out of pure boredom. Usually, on a normal day, there’d be something to do. Whether that was paperwork, speaking to clients, scheduling meetings, or placing orders. But today? Not. A. Damn. Fucking. Thing. It took everything in Jake to not purposely sit back into his chair far enough that it tipped over and caused a panic just to help give everyone something to do. 
He checked the clock at the far end of the office, still two hours left before he could dip out and head to soccer practice then return home and be in your arms. Which was the only thing keeping him from jumping out the second-story window from this boredom, by the way. 
As if the thoughts of you were enough to manifest your text, he couldn’t hold back the smile at seeing your name on his phone. 
you: I folded your laundry jakey <3 jake: tysm baby <3 what would I do without you fr fr? 
The love Jake felt for you in this moment made him feel all warm and content, you were so good to him and for him. He literally couldn’t ask for a better girlfriend. 
you: I did more than just your laundry.  jake: oh? you: [6 image attachments]
Jake nearly dropped his phone to the floor, his pants growing tighter the minute those sexy photos popped up in his texts. Quickly locked his phone and with a swift motion glanced over his shoulder making sure none of his co-workers were behind him when he received those photos. 
You smirked at seeing he read the message, already knowing he was probably panicking while being as hard as a rock. Leaning back on your ass to spread your legs further apart, you slide your fingers down your folds, spreading your lips apart. The very thought of Jake squirming at his desk to hide his raging boner had you completely soaked. 
Jake tried to clear his thoughts, to take deep breaths to keep calm and soften his cock but not having any luck. The images of bending you over this desk in front of him and railing the fuck out of you in his jersey wouldn’t leave his brain. His pants grew ever more tighter against him. 
He knew he had to take care of this boner and fast before anyone noticed and he became the laughing joke for the next month. 
With anger now fueling him, he grabbed his jacket from the back of the chair and held it close to his lower stomach as he stood from his chair, “Gonna take a quick break, be right back,” he said to Heeseung and Jay, they giving him a quick nod before returning to their rock paper scissors game. 
Jake slammed the bathroom door shut and locked, tossing his jacket to the counter. Unbuttoning his pants and pulling the zipper down feeling the relief of his throbbing cock not being restricted, slamming his back against the door. 
Jake fumbled with his phone in his hands, fingers shaking as he texted you back after saving each photo one by one. 
jake: that was risky sending nudes like that while I am working.  you: but you loved it, didn’t you? ;) jake: what if someone saw them? i’m the only one who gets to see you like that.  you: oops you: [2 image attachments] 
He clicked the two new photos, seeing the way your fingers spread your folds apart, your cunt glistening against the sunlight that beamed into the room from your slick. 
Jake gritted his teeth, immediately dialing your number and pressing the phone to his ear, the call instantly going to voice mail, “ugh fucking whore,” he grumbled, redialing your number again. You knew better than to ignore his call a second time and answer. 
With a shaky voice, you said, “Hey baby,” 
“Hmm don’t hey baby me,” he growled, his free hand palming himself through his boxers at your voice, “you’re being so risky right now sending me those nudes, YN.” 
You could tell by his voice how hard and turned-on he was. You could hear it in his voice that he was touching himself. It made you circle your fingers on your clit and cunt clench around nothing, “Hmm but you’re enjoying it, aren’t you Jakey?” 
He slid his boxers and jeans down to his thighs, seeing how red and angry his cock was, how the precum slowly dripped down the side of the tip. He took himself in his hand and slowly pumped himself, “You’re being so naughty right now, being so slutty.” 
You softly moan at him degrading you, rubbing your fingers against your fuck hole, the lewd sounds making their way into Jake’s ear. 
“You better not be touching yourself,” he snapped, pumping his cock faster, tightening his fingers. He was so angry and so horny that the lines were getting blurred. He wanted nothing more than for his fingers to be the ones rubbing your clit, sliding his fingers in and out of you. 
“And what if I am?” you cooed, hovering your fingers over your hole. 
“Stop,” he demanded, “Stop pleasuring yourself without me there as punishment for sending me nudes while I am working.” 
Jake had to admit this was so fucking hot. Even if your bratty behavior was driving him up a wall in more than just one way. 
“And if I don’t?” you cooed again, licking your bottom lip. 
“Keep being a brat and find out.” 
You pushed your fingers into your cunt, releasing a soft gasp. 
“You better not be fucking touching yourself,” he said again. 
You giggled, then ended the call. 
Oh, now he was pissed. 
Jake dropped his cock against his abdomen, both thumbs moving at the speed of light in anger, texting out a message about your bratty behavior, but stopping midway through to see a photo and video coming up. 
The photo made his jaw clench. His jersey was now pulled up over your breasts, your perky nipples on full display as your legs are spread even wider than in the last couple of photos, with two of your fingers pushed knuckles deep into your pussy. 
What a fucking brat.
The video was worse. You moaned loudly as you circled your fingers around your clit, then slowly slipped them between your legs, gathering your juices from your seeping hole, rubbing it up and spreading it around your lips. A small amount of it leaked from your cunt, slowly dripping down to the hardwood floor of his bedroom and then the video ended. 
WHAT. A. FUCKING. BRAT. 
He spit in his hand and took his cock back into his palm, stroking himself faster than before, head tilting back onto the door, biting his lip to keep his moans at a minimal level as his thumb worked to text you back. 
jake: it’s all over for you  you: oh yeah? jake: yeah jake: i’m going to fucking ruin you
You smirked, locking your phone and tossing it onto his bed, and pulled your pretty dark blue panties back onto your body. 
While you were smitten at what you’ve created, Jake is drawing blood from his lip at how hard his teeth bit down. His hand pumping him in a pit of anger. How dare you disobey him? Even if it made him even more horny, how dare you? It was one thing to be bratty while with him, but to be so brave to do it while he’s away from you? Did you think you were safe? Nah. It’s over for you the minute he steps foot into that apartment. You wouldn’t know peace. Getting everything but being gentle with you. 
Jake flipped through the photos and video you sent him, watching again and again how your slick drips from your cunt and onto his floor until his cum shoots out, coating his stomach. He loved seeing you wearing his clothes, mostly his jersey. Loving seeing his last name printed on the back with your gorgeous fat ass out sitting so perfectly on your perfect legs. Jake didn’t hesitate to make that his new home wallpaper. It was so fucking hot even with how mad he was. 
Jerking off might have taken care of his boner problem, but the main issue here is the fact he still has a little over an hour before getting off work and still had soccer practice to attend. The only thing Jake knew was you definitely made his workday entertaining. 
You were banking on that by the time Jake gets off work and attends practice, he would be way too tired to even punish you. So you pranced around his apartment in his jersey and your dark blue panties with a big ole smile on your face. 
Your stomach growled and decided to push your bratty, naughty girlfriend persona off to the back burner and go back to your sweet, caring, loving, and cute girlfriend persona who takes care of her boyfriend’s apartment while he’s away. 
You cooked dinner, which you don’t often do but still will on days Jake has longer schedules like tonight—putting together the perfect recipe for spaghetti and meatballs. 
Once the food was done, you checked the time, seeing Jake was probably off work now and heading to practice. You felt good knowing that once he returns home he’ll have a warm meal to eat. 
Except, you weren’t expecting what was about to happen. 
Jake skipped practice. 
Being way too damn horny and couldn’t wait a second longer. Jake was lucky he was able to keep a perfect boner (that unfortunately resurfaced) during the last hour of work. Made a phone call the minute he was out of his company building to his coach about how something urgent came up and he’d be missing practice tonight. 
Urgent as in him fucking you until you could no longer stand or walk. For a whole fucking week. 
Jake was sneaky as he carefully pushed his key into the doorknob and tip-toed his way in. Slowly and quietly closing the door behind him and slipping out of his shoes. 
The smell of dinner filled his nose as he turned the corner, seeing you stand at the counter with your back facing him. 
Jake carefully made his way across the living room, removing his shirt from his body, stopping at the couch to quietly yank down his jeans and boxers and slide them over the back of the couch. 
You hummed to yourself as you finished up your dinner, wiggling your hips to whatever song you had stuck in your head. 
Jake adored you, he really did. The feeling of endearment filled his heart at seeing how happy and cute you looked right now. Jake almost—almost—forgave your behavior from earlier at the sight before him and the smell of dinner waiting for him. But his raging hard cock and the flash of your dark blue panties pulled him back. He’ll give you his forgiveness another time.
You barely pushed the empty plate away from you when you felt a pair of hands touch you. One at the back of your neck and the other on your back, shoving you forward onto the counter. Your face is now pressed against the cool marble. 
Your breath hitched at feeling your boyfriend’s long, hard length connecting to your ass. You don’t even need to look at him to know the hands and cock touching you’re his. You could be blind and you’d know your boyfriend's hands without a second thought. 
You finally saw him in your peripheral vision as his chest connected to your back, hot breath hitting your ear, “You think making dinner would put you in good graces?” 
“Jae,” you whined, “You’re home so early.” 
He chuckled into your ear, “Skipped practice, had more important matters to take care of.” 
Important matters being to punish you for your behavior. You could already feel your slick pooling in your panties even as your heart raced, mind wondering what he had in store for you. You could also tell he was already naked, meaning Jake meant business and no amount of apologizing would save you. Not that you wanted to be saved anyway. 
The hand that was at your back slid down, aggressively squeezing your ass before slipping his hand around your thigh and between your legs, feeling your wetness pool onto his fingers. Jake hissed at the feeling. You were soaked. He didn’t even need to prep you. And that drove him insane. 
“I told you to not fucking touch yourself,” he growled, his tongue licking up your ear, “But you had to go be a slut and disobey me.” 
You backed your ass against him, both hands shooting to your hips and gripping them tightly, “Don’t,” he warned, “Don’t fucking move.” 
You obeyed, keeping as still as possible. Trying so hard to not rub your thighs together in anticipation of what is to come. 
Jake lifted himself off of you, eyes drifting down to your dark blue panties, seeing the wet spot from your cunt on full display, all for him. 
Jake didn’t want to wait those few couple seconds to slide your pretty panties down your legs and throw them across the room. No, no. That wouldn’t be fun. He looped his index fingers into the fabric and the sound of them ripping filled the kitchen. 
“Jake!” you snapped, starting to lift yourself off the counter, only to feel his hand right back on your neck and face meeting the marble once again, “Those were my favorite panties!” 
“Womp womp,” he cooed, his thumb rubbing circles on the back of your neck, as his fingers slid down to your clit, “Shouldn't have been acting like a fucking brat today. I also told you to not fucking move.” 
Jake violently, and fastly, circled his fingers on your clit. It took everything in you to not moan out in such pleasure. Not wanting to give your boyfriend the satisfaction of hearing you. He wanted to call you a brat? You’ll act like a brat. 
Jake wasn’t stupid, he knew you were purposely holding back those sweet moans he desperately wanted to hear all in a way to get back at him. Unfortunately for you, Jake knows your body inside and out. Know what gets you going. Knows how to get you cumming with just his words alone. Knows how to work his cock in your pussy that will have you scream chanting his name at the top of your lungs for the whole apartment complex to hear. 
He released his hand from your neck and wrapped it in your hair in a makeshift ponytail, yanking harshly to pull you up, your back now pressed to his chest.
“Wanna act like a fucking brat with me, hmm? What will be happening next is the consequences of your actions.” 
Your bratty behavior was short-lived as his fingers worked faster against your clit, his breath whispering how much of a slut you were, his little whore, how bad of a girl you were acting today. 
Your body tensed, and Jake removed his fingers, “Jae,” you whined at the loss of his fingers, feeling the climax you so badly wanted fade away, taking it upon yourself to slide your own fingers to your heat to finish yourself off, only for Jake to slap your hand away, and you were back to being bent over the countertop, your arms being pinned above you. 
“Nah,” he groaned, his free hand gripping your thigh to bend it up and onto the counter, “Bad girls don’t get to cum, not when they disobey their boyfriend.” 
You groaned against the marble, feeling your hot breath push back up at you, “Jae, I’m sorry,” 
Jake smirked, he finally broke you. 
“Oh, yeah?” he whispered, taking his cock between his fingers and lining the tip up to your fuck hole, “You’re sorry?” 
You nodded, fingers gripping the hand that held yours. You wanted his cock so far up inside you so bad you were willing to beg, to apologize if it got you what you wanted. 
Jake slowly pushed the tip in, “Use your words, baby,” 
“Yes,” you pant, “I am sorry for being a brat.” 
“Hmmm,” Jake hummed, “You’re still going to be punished.” 
Jake aggressively pushed himself into you, completely bottoming out. 
You chant out a string of “yes yes yes,” at him filling you up. But to your dismay, he didn’t move. 
His fingers found your clit again, going just as fast as they did before his palm pushed down on your tummy, putting more pressure on his dick wrapped in your walls. 
You let out wet moans, drool sliding out your mouth and onto the countertop. 
“Louder, baby,” he groaned, “let me hear those sounds,” 
You moaned louder, cunt clenching around him, and his fingers were once again gone. 
You hissed at him and he just chuckled, “I told you bad girls don’t get to cum,” 
He continued to edge you, dick still not moving inside of you, reminding you over and over again that this was your punishment, this was the consequences of your actions. Being denied the release you so desperately wanted. 
Tears filled your eyes, head softly tilting up to make eye contact with him. 
His pupils were blown out, full of lust, want, and need. You could tell by his facial expression he was losing his fucking mind. But Jake was strong-willed, and all it took was you locking eyes with him, batting those pretty eyes at him with those little tears for his grin to grow wider and decide to finally let you release. 
Jake loved edging you, loved being so dominant and in control over you. Most importantly, he loved seeing how he’s ruined you. 
“Cum,” he whispered into your ear, “Cum for me my love, make a sweet mess on my cock.” 
You clenched around him, his fingers continued making their circles and showing no sign of slowing down until he felt your release on his cock. 
“Fuck, yes,” he moaned, slowing his fingers. 
Jake could feel your cum seeping out of your hole and down his thigh. He lifted your leg on the countertop even higher, spreading you so wide for him.
Then he started moving. 
You yelped, your back arching, hands scrambling to get out of his hold to grip the counter. He fucked into you at a primal rate. The hand on your thigh squeezing the plush so hard his nails dug into the skin sure to leave bruises. 
His hand released your hands and found their way back into your hair, pulling you back up against his chest. 
“Scream my name,” he moaned into your ear, breathing unevenly from the pure pleasure his cock was feeling as he railed you against this counter, “Scream my name.” 
And you did, using every ounce of air in your lungs to scream his name, his cock hitting your g-spot as your climax built up again. You already knew you’d have bruises on your hips from hitting the counter by his fucking, that your voice would be nonexistent in the morning, your legs would be jelly, and barely be able to move. 
But you loved it. Loved every bit of it. These were the consequences of your choices, after all. 
You leaned your head back onto his shoulder, mouth gaping open as you continued to moan out his name in pleasure. Jake couldn’t help himself, your mouth looked so pretty all open for him and shoved his fingers into your mouth, the middle pushing down onto your tongue. 
Your eyes rolled to the back of your head, tongue swirling around his digits the best you could with the pressure he had on it. 
Jake was losing his mind as he looked down at you, seeing the way your breasts bounce as his dick fucked up into you, seeing the way your nipples graze against his jersey. 
Fuck he was so in love with you. 
His thrusts became sloppy and not as aggressive. He was reaching his climax. 
“Ughh m’gunna cum,” he moaned, your lips wrapping around his fingers and slightly biting down onto them, making him hiss in response. 
Jake wanted to cum so fucking bad, wanted to feel you tightly around him as he came. 
He shoved your leg off the counter, groaning as he forced your thighs to touch, making you so much tighter around him. You came right then and there from that pressure, sending Jake’s head spinning. 
He bent you back over the countertop, removing his fingers from your mouth and gripping the other side of the counter, his hand that was in your mouth slipping from your saliva and accidentally shoving the plate that once held your dinner off the counter and onto the hard floor with a crash. 
He pressed his chest to your back, using all his leg and hip strength to fuck harder into you in a way of begging for his release. His knuckles turned white from the grip he had on the counter, teeth biting down into your shoulder. 
The last moan you let out in sync with his final thrust sent him over the edge, his cum painting your walls. Jake thrust a couple more times to chase his high, milking his cock with your cunt of every last drop until it was leaking down your leg. 
“Fuck, fuck,” he pants, releasing the counter and running his hands down to your waist, softly squeezing as he plants soft kisses on your back, “I fucking love you.”
With a shaky breath, you told him you loved him too. 
He pulled out of you, and lifted you from the counter, already seeing how wobbly your legs were, it boosted his ego. 
Jake embraced you, kissing all over your face before landing on your lips in a soft, passionate kiss. 
Just when you think you’ve paid your dues, Jake’s cock hardened against your stomach, and his eyes went dark again, his index finger pointing at the broken plate on the floor while his other hand gripped your chin, “Clean it up please for me baby while I eat the delicious dinner you made for me, can’t let it go to waste.” 
You nodded, watching as Jake removed himself from you and walked to the stove, grabbing a plate. You studied his back muscles, lip tucking between your teeth at how sexy he was shirtless, how sexy his back was. 
“Oh, YN?” you hummed in response, watching as he slowly turned to face you, “Drink some water to soothe that throat of yours will ya? You’re going to suck me off after I eat.” 
You rubbed your thighs together in excitement. Hands playing with the ends of his jersey. 
Maybe you’ll be a brat when he’s away more often.
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chironshorseass · 4 months
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ok i really really really enjoyed watching the first two episodes and i think the show is already so faithful to the books in ways the movies wished they were BUT i’m gonna be a bitch just because i can and rant about a few insignificant but at the same time very important Things the writers didn’t Understand:
percy is angry.
and i know this is seen with his anger towards poseidon in the show, but i’m talking angry. as in, generally speaking. when he’s with grover and they’re talking about nancy, percy says something along the lines of “we should fight back,” and grover’s like “noooo we can’t stand up to bullies.” and then percy stands up to her and blah blah blah…but in the books percy’s first line is “i’m going to kill her” after she throws a sandwich at grover. grover talks him out of it because he’s already on probation.
with just this scene we know percy stands up to bullies, and that’s partly why he has so much trouble at school! in the show, he stands up to nancy, apparently for the first time, and gets kicked out because of it! sorry but as someone who worked in a school, i know for a fact that kids can get away with so much more before they’re actually kicked out lol. it would’ve made sense, like in tlt, that he’s already at risk of suspension so him “pushing” nancy is the final straw. it’s just very weird, considering it could be only a line of dialogue that makes percy’s anger and the connection between his outburst and him getting kicked out more clear.
consequently, percy arrives at his appartment and gabe is just a general (still admittedly abusive) jerk instead of a drunk, violent (also abusive) man. when we meet gabe, it makes a lot of sense why percy has so much trouble with his anger. it’s easy to see that connection. literal child + alcoholic abusive father figure = there’s bound to be some trouble….that’s not really the case in the show, especially in the way that sally easily stands up to him. people have said a fair bit about this topic already, so i’m not gonna expand on that, but i really wish the writers had focused more on percy’s internal anger, as it’s such an important part of his character and affects the way he reacts to things throughout the books; it just worries me that in the first episode it wasn’t as established. i. e. he hates dionysus on sight because he reminds him of smelly gabe, he hates the gods—is angry at poseidon—because, where was he when my mom and i were suffering at the hands of smelly gabe? ok i’m not gonna talk about more of this or of sally because other people have said it and i could write a four page essay of what the show got wrong plus i want to talk abt other things before this gets too long:
the monster scenes.
the mrs. dodds being a fury reveal felt sooo…weird? even the movie version did it better lol. it felt super rushed and strange how percy’s just standing there and the next he’s on the ground, but he had riptide with him so he just impaled her and then she turned to dust??? in the books, not only does she get percy alone, but grover tries to stand up to her—which is a big deal since he knows what she truly is and shows how much he cares for percy in that moment. percy has time to be genuinely terrified bc he’s alone with a literal monster and he’s about to die…and chiron throws him riptide just in time, but then he too vanishes so percy’s left wondering if he imagined everything. but no, in the show mrs. dodds comes out of nowhere and attacks him, and it’s so fast that percy doesn’t have time to dwell on wtf happened. the situation doesn’t seem as serious as it does in the book; in the book she tries to interrogate percy bc she thinks he’s the lightning thief, and when she doesn’t get her answer, she attacks him. this is another thing: the stakes. they don’t feel as high in the show because there’s no annabeth trying to ask percy what was stolen, no hellhound, no fates cutting a string, and no alecto/mrs. dodds interrogation. there’s not much of a lead up to the quest, really.
theeen the minotaur scene, which also feels super weirdly paced and there’s just not that same sense of urgency. again, other people have talked about this, so i’ll just stick to another main concern of mine: grover’s role in the scene. it was so strange how in the book he’s semi unconscious and in the show he’s fine (so fine that sally does something completely out of character and makes grover swear to keep percy safe? she would never put that much pressure in a child???) ok so he seems fine in the show, but then when they’re running percy’s holding him as if he can’t walk???? they’re not even fully sprinting, given that a monster is chasing them lol. (the problem with the stakes; i mean with the way they run and have an entire talk with sally makes it feel like they’re not in any real danger).
back to grover: he was perfectly fine, and he got percy back safe. not at all like in tlt, where percy has to practically carry him back, after loosing his mom and killing the minotaur. THEN percy passes out and later wakes up at the big house. this is important, bc grover’s entire THING is being percy’s protector, and he couldn’t do that properly bc he was indisposed. he felt awful. of course he did. his character arc is overcoming the guilt and insecurities—that he’s not a proper protector and therefore can’t search for pan; his main character motivation—by successfully completing the quest and helping percy retrieve the master bolt.
these are just little seeds that needed to be planted in the first two episodes of the show…so that the rest of the show feels cohesive and makes sense with what happens in tlt. if these character traits and scenes are looked over and not given proper importance/not replaced with something similar, then the show will have a different tone than it does to the books. i don’t think it’s necessarily bad, but it is disappointing that the details sprinkled in the source material are lost in translation. they may have seemed insignificant to the writers, but not to meeee!!!!!!
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veethefreeelf · 4 months
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Love is a strong word - Y.JH
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This is part 2 to ‘Hate is a strong word’ I’M SORRY it took a while but real life got in the way also my eye is being extra annoying! I hope you guys love this as much as I do (づ๑•ᴗ•๑)づ♡
Summary: 
It’s been a year since you moved away to a new branch. If you’re being honest, things haven’t been great. Being away from all you know and all you wanted has made you realize a lot of things and made you wish you had done things differently. Maybe moving back would be better for you. 
Wordcount: 15k
Warnings: lots of conflict and resolutions, super emotional, angsty as fuck, protected v. penetration, fingering, lots of praising and fluff, nothing major, smut is pretty tame and loving, biting because yes
Requested: yes, by popular demand 
P.S - Italic is for thoughts mainly from the characters’ perspective and quotes. Bold is for text messages/calls/voice messages between characters
It’s been a year since you moved to this new city and another branch at your company. It isn’t exactly going like you thought it would. You thought you would make friends easily. You thought your career would have progressed. You thought you wouldn’t think that much about Jeonghan. You were wrong on all counts.
Your career was still at the same stage it was when you moved. No exciting opportunities had opened. You had met some really nice people and your new team was great but you missed your team, you missed your best friends. You even missed Clara’s perverted comments on a daily basis. You missed the team meetings. You missed Jeonghan. You missed him a lot. 
One thing moving to a smaller town and being new will do to you is give you time to think about the past. You had thought a lot about Jeonghan. What your feelings for him were. Why you were trying to keep him away. Why you told yourself you were fine with him being on a date with Hana while fucking you. Being away from all of them gave you a lot of clarity on a lot of things from your past. It also allowed you to feel things without fear and embrace everything you were too scared to do before.
Too bad it was too late. 
You don’t know what happened with Jeonghan and Hana but you imagine them being happy together. And it devastated you. You should’ve said something. You shouldn’t have ran. You were a coward and it made you lose one of the best things in your life all because of pride.
No one from your previous team ever found out about you and Jeonghan. And every time you visited them or they visited you, the subject was never brought up. And, if you were being honest with yourself, you didn’t want to know. ‘Ignorance is bliss’ you tell yourself. At least this way you can pretend he doesn’t hate you now and that he is single and waiting for you. Your therapist disagrees and hopes you will face all your fears the next time you see him.
That’s another thing you did when you moved here. You got help. You got a therapist and it has helped you a lot. If anything, at least this year has made you grow as a person and made you realize how you should’ve handled most things in your life in the past. She has also helped you figure out ways for you to deal with your current feelings and given you tools to keep improving yourself to make sure you make the right decisions for yourself in the future.
It was okay living here though. The apartment wasn’t the best. You missed your baby terribly but you managed. You were adjusting fairly well. Initially, you had cried every day. It was very difficult to not see your people and not sleep in your bed. Now you were better. You were dealing with the consequences of your decision in a better way. You tried visiting your friends more and tried getting to know your new team more as well. You couldn’t deny that you did want to go back. To the branch, to your team, to your apartment, to… Everything that you left behind. But you didn’t think that opportunity would happen any time soon.
Work was always uneventful. All teams got along great and it was easy making decisions together. Also being a smaller branch, you didn’t get as many big accounts, so sometimes it was just a bit too slow for you and what you were accustomed to.
Today you had to finish the monthly report to your manager but not much else was going on so you let your team go home early for the day. You were having a hard time focusing on your work. Something that seems to have started when you moved here. You didn’t use to have this issue before. You were in the middle of your thoughts when your phone rang and snapped you out of it. You looked at it and smiled before answering.
“Hoshi, my beloved… Why are you calling me during work hours?”
“Seriously, this is your fault. Why would you leave us? This new manager is driving us insane” Hoshi told you in a whispered tone.
“Come on… He can’t be that bad. I heard really good things about him from when he was a team member here”
“I don’t know what kind of lies they told you but he is insane. His demands are outrageous. Remember how Jeonghan used to annoy us because he just wanted to? Well, this new guy has made Jeonghan annoy us even more and now Jeonghan is actually right! Can’t you understand how wrong this is?” Hoshi asked you.
“Here I thought I was special and Jeonghan only annoyed me. I guess we were all played, huh?” you asked Hoshi playfully.
“This isn’t funny, Y/N. Jeonghan has to be an asshole now because someone has to stop this guy. He is not ready to be a manager. You need to help us, say something to someone about him, please. I am begging you. We are begging you. And you owe us from leaving us with this lunatic” Hoshi answered in a very serious tone.
“Look, I can try and find out more about him and talk to my manager to see if anything can be done. But you know I don’t have that kind of power. You need to go to HR. Talk to Cass, she is usually the best person to reach for these things and she happens to be super close with Sunny. I will do the best I can on my side but I can’t guarantee anything” you told him sincerely. 
What you didn’t tell him was that you wished you could switch with their manager and get back to your team. You hadn’t told them yet that you wanted to be back. It’s not a possibility and it would only make everyone sadder. You were done being selfish.
“I know. I know, Y/N. It’s just… Why can’t you come back? This guy is clearly not a good fit for our branch and for our team” Hoshi told you in a sad tone.
“It’s not my choice anymore. There’s no openings at all Hoshi. And I made a commitment to this branch when I moved here. I can’t just up and leave” 
“You say that but we both know your worth and how much this company needs you. They would do anything you wanted to keep you. You could request to come back specially with all of us not getting along well with the new team lead. And it’s nothing personal. He just isn’t good at being a manager and he isn’t ready for it at this branch yet” Hoshi continued sincerely.
“I will speak to my manager about him, okay? But that’s all I can do for right now. You should reach out to Cass in HR on your side. The whole team should actually. And any other team that is also being affected by this should speak up as well” you added sternly.
“Okay, Y/N. Thank you. I have to go before he loses his shit. I hope you’re well and please, visit us soon” he said and you both hung up.
In a way Hoshi was right. You could request this change to the company. And it would make sense. Their new manager came from this branch where things are much slower and much easier. He was not ready for the big leagues as a manager at least. It would be easy to convince your manager. 
For now, you would do the right thing and put your personal feelings aside. You would talk to your manager just like you promised Hoshi and it would be up to them on how to proceed from here.
There was a knock on your door and one of your team members - Chris - walked in.
“I thought I told you to go home for the day. Nothing to do around here for now” you told him and smiled.
“Well, you know me. I can’t leave with the boss still around. Hardly seems fair. Also I like to work for my money, thank you very much” he added as he started to move to sit on the chair across from you.
“Never met anyone that wouldn’t rush out of the office if told by their bosses before. Also please don’t call me boss. I told you so many times Chris” you said. Chris smiled.
Chris was a lovely guy. He was your right hand at this branch. He introduced you to everyone and made it easier for you to adjust to the change. He is also one of your best team members. Very hard working and constantly looking to improve and progress his career as well. He reminds you of a younger you.
The only problem with Chris is that he seems very interested in you. He has reached out to you about his feelings several times and wants you to give him a chance. This is one of the reasons you mostly haven’t gotten to know your team in the same way you tried with your previous team.
He was gorgeous. Tall. Muscular. Beautiful Australian accent. You were simply not interested. You had someone else in your mind and in your heart and even though you weren’t strong enough and brave enough to do anything about it, you knew you could never start something new with someone else without resolving the past.
Chris knew it too. Well not the whole ‘having feelings for someone else’ part but that you weren’t interested. And he had been very understanding. He hadn’t pushed at all. Simply told you if anything changed, he would always be open to explore your relationship further. It was sweet. He was one of the few things that kept you sane over here and you didn’t want to lose him.
“Are you going to be done soon? I was thinking maybe we can leave together?” Chris asked you.
“Sorry, no. I’ve been procrastinating for the last 20 minutes and now I’m late in delivering this. You go ahead and leave. I’m also going to try and catch the actual boss before leaving” you told him and he got up to leave.
“Alright, Y/N. See you tomorrow, have a great night” he told you before leaving.
Thankfully, your manager was still here as well and you were able to talk to him about the new team lead that Hoshi told you about. Seungkwan was his name. He was a very passionate team lead over here and yes, demanding but no one had ever had any complaints since he had been promoted. You explained to your boss the pace of the two branches are very different and so are the team members and the demands. You recommended someone check on the teams of the other branch and with Seungkwan himself to understand how everyone is adjusting and if any changes are necessary and your boss agreed. 
You’ve done your part. You have warned the right people and now it’s up to them to assess and make decisions. 
You got home and called Hoshi to tell him and he was relieved. He also reached out to Cass and everyone else on his team did the same. Apparently, tomorrow the advertising team and some IT members are also going to Cass about Seungkwan. Wow. He really hasn’t made any friends. Poor guy. This branch was very happy with him when he was here. Maybe he just isn’t ready for the amount of work and stress the other branch entails. 
During that phone call with Hoshi, he asked you to come visit the following weekend and you agreed. You needed to see all of them. You told him to please arrange for all the team members to be available to hang out and drink and eat and gossip and he was more than happy to start sending voice messages screaming in the group chat you all have together. It made you smile so hard that they were still the same crazy bunch and they still cared so much about you even after you left.
Since you have a big drive to do whenever you visit, you made a request to your boss to book next Thursday and Friday off so you could really enjoy a proper weekend with them and with your apartment. He approved and you were all set for next week. You were so excited too. You couldn’t hide it.
“I wonder if Y/N will ever get this excited to see us in the future” Hyunjin, another one of your team members spoke and it broke you out of your daydream and silly smile.
“Definitely not. We’re the rebound” Felix - your sweetest team member - chimed in.
“Hey! That’s unfair. I’ve never treated any of you like a rebound. How dare you?” you asked Felix and pouted.
Everyone laughed and your team meeting proceeded again without any incidents. Like you said, your team was great and if you hadn’t had the perfect team members before, maybe you could appreciate them more but you truly missed your people. You were so ready to come and see them. 
The week went by fast and at last Wednesday arrived and you couldn't wait for the day to end for you to go home and get ready to leave. Before your day was done, your boss called you into his office to discuss something that apparently couldn’t wait until you got back.
“I know you have to leave and I’m sorry to call you in right now but it’s precisely because you are going to visit them over there that I wanted to get this out of the way before you left” he told you once you sat down in front of him.
“I’m not getting fired, am I? That would lead to a depressing weekend” you said jokingly and you both laughed.
“Not at all. This company will do the best they can to keep you around in any branch and you know that as well. You’re far too valuable. This is about the team lead situation you brought to light to me last week, actually” he told you and you sat there silently waiting for him to continue.
“After we talked about it, I brought it up to the head of HR and they actually talked to everyone at that branch including Seungkwan and his manager to understand what could be happening. It was determined that Seungkwan is not ready for a managerial position at that branch just yet. However, he still wanted to stay on as a team member for the marketing team and learn from the new team lead that joins their team instead of coming back to this branch” he added and you nodded.
“Now, as much as the possibility of losing you pains me personally, it’s up to me to let you know that the company is actually giving you the choice. Since you were the one that started bringing this to everyone’s attention and you were extremely successful in leading the team in the other branch before, they wanted to give you the opportunity to return to the branch as team lead if you wanted to”
“Return?” you asked confused.
Your manager laughed.
“Yes. You have one of two options. Return there as team lead and continue on where you left off with the team and to your success or stay here with us” he said and you looked down.
“Look, I know this branch isn’t working exactly as you thought it would for you. I’m not blind to that. Not only that but the opportunities that you were told you were getting here haven’t happened and won’t anytime soon. So even though I don’t want to lose you, I really want you to think it over” 
“Does anyone else know about this? Team members, branches?” you asked him.
“No. The managers know but no one else. They will only be told after a decision is made. If you choose to stay with us, they will hire an outsider for the team lead position at the other branch. If you choose to return to your branch, we will most likely promote Chris as the team lead here” he answered you.
“Chris would be great as a team lead for this team. They all trust him and he has seen me do a lot of the team lead tasks so he’ll learn quickly” you told your manager.
“Does this mean you’re choosing to return to them then?” he asked you and you paused.
“No… I don’t know yet. Can I think this over the weekend? I’m assuming you also told me this today to have me think it over while I’m there” you said and laughed lightly.
“Of course and yes, that’s exactly why I told you. Monday we can discuss this more but go have fun and rest” he told you. You said your goodbyes for the weekend and went home to pack and get ready.
It’s funny. You spent most of this year wanting this opportunity to open up. And now that it’s here, you’re hesitating. 
Going back there would mean facing a lot of things you left behind. Things you weren’t sure you were completely ready for just yet. Sure, you had been working on yourself and on making better decisions for yourself and on being more honest with everyone around you but you were still scared.
Returning also meant finding out what happened with Jeonghan this last year and you didn’t know if you were ready for that. If he was still dating Hana and you had to start seeing them together every day, you might lose your mind completely. Not knowing anything made you feel that maybe, just maybe, he was waiting for you just like you were waiting for him. You didn’t want that delusion to be shattered by reality.
On the other hand, you missed everyone terribly. You missed the pacing of your job, your people, your apartment, your favorite restaurants. Would you really pass this opportunity up just because you were scared of getting your heart broken?
You haven’t decided yet. Maybe your manager is right. Seeing everyone and going back there can really help you make a final decision and the right decision for yourself personally and professionally. 
The next day you were well rested and ready for the drive. All you could think about was seeing your apartment and lying in your bed.
As soon as you got to your apartment, you felt like a new person. You loved the feeling of coming home. Your actual home. You went out to get groceries and came back home to cook a nice meal and hang out at your place. You missed this so much, being by yourself in your home and binging a show on the couch. This was all you had planned for today. 
Tomorrow you were meeting them at your usual place where you used to have most of your team building dinners. You missed that place too even if the last time you were there you were faced with Jeonghan and Hana on a date. You were not going to let them ruin a great restaurant for you. Tomorrow you would enjoy hanging out with everyone and hopefully get a better understanding of what the right decision is for you. For now, you’ll just enjoy your cozy home you missed so much.
The next day and a half went by fast and it was now Friday night and you were getting ready to go to dinner. You couldn’t wait to see them and get a little crazy. It’s been such a long while since you were all together like this.
You took a Uber and got to the restaurant a bit early but you were just too excited. As you were getting ready to go in, you heard Hoshi calling your name from across the street.
“Y/N! You’re early! Aren’t you a bit too excited to hang out with your favorite people in the entire world?? Simp” Hoshi yelled from across the street as Seokmin was still getting out of the Uber behind him.
“I missed this restaurant and I’m hungry. Don’t flatter yourself!” you yelled back and the three of you laughed.
Hoshi and Seokmin crossed the street and you finally hugged. You missed them so much.
“We should go in. Everyone else is already here and Shua was already texting me and being clingy. He really missed you” Seokmin said and started moving towards the entrance of the restaurant. 
“Shua? You invited him? I thought it was just us” you said and your heart started beating rapidly inside your chest. 
“Oh it wasn’t me, Y/N. Hoshi here invited the whole advertising team and they all accepted” Seokmin said as he smiled mischievously at Hoshi.
“Thanks, Seokmin…” Hoshi said and turned to you.
“You invited them? Why? Hoshi I wanted to hang out just us like the old days… I thought I was pretty clear…” you said and Seokmin patted Hoshi on the back and got in the restaurant leaving you both alone.
“Look, they overheard me and I felt bad not inviting them. Shua and Wonwoo talk about you all the time. They miss you too, Y/N” 
“Why not invite just them then? Why everyone?” you asked. You were trying to look behind Hoshi into the restaurant but you couldn’t see the table you were all sitting at.
“Is this about Jeonghan? I thought you two were cool…” Hoshi asked as he scratched the back of his head.
“It’s fine. Don’t worry about it. I was just surprised. Thank you for getting everyone together, Hoshi” 
He smiled and you both started to go into the restaurant and to the back towards your table. There were a lot of you so they placed your table at the back of the restaurant for more privacy. Also they knew your team well and how loud you could get with drinks in you so it was the overall best option for everyone.
“Stop everything! She has arrived!” Hoshi yelled as you two got to the table and almost everyone jumped.
“I will have a heart attack working with you people” someone you didn’t know spoke up and you stared at Hoshi.
“That’s our new team lead. He invited himself” Hoshi whispered to you.
“So you’re the one terrorizing these teams? Gotta say… Very impressive. Here I thought I was special but you can get everyone just as mad” you said and everyone laughed.
Jeonghan had been staring at you since the moment you walked up to the table. You could feel his eyes on you. You were trying to act normal in front of your team but you wanted to talk to him. Maybe tonight is not the best night to talk things over but you needed to at least understand if there even was a possibility of talking things over. You definitely don’t think you can come back if things are not resolved between the two of you.
Dinner with everyone was easy. Everyone was telling stories and telling you the updates for everything and you even got to know Seungkwan a bit more. He seemed like a wonderful guy. He was loud and he and Hoshi were always on each other’s nerves but if you were to come back, you could see this working well. He would make a wonderful addition as a team member.
Shua, Seungcheol and Wonwoo tried pretending to be upset with you for a bit but that all fell to pieces when you all got into your usual shenanigans. Another thing you realize now that you’re here is that you definitely neglected these three boys when you left. You completely lost touch with them and it wasn’t fair to them. You’re lucky they’re being merciful.
Silvia has gotten really close with Seokmin you can tell. It’s cute. She has always been the quiet one whenever your teams are together and it’s good to see she feels a bit more comfortable around everyone with Seokmin by her side.
Jeonghan didn’t say much throughout the dinner. He laughed sometimes and smiled but didn’t chime in much. You didn’t know what changed (if anything) in his life since you left. Maybe he was doing this on purpose. You wish you were brave enough to ask him directly in front of everyone.
As usual, Clara breaks you out of your thoughts by saying the most outrageous shit out of nowhere.
“So, Y/N… Be honest… Have you fucked that Chris guy on your team yet?” 
There is a moment where everyone is silent and then a few seconds later of staring at each other everyone bursts out laughing.
“I missed your ridiculousness, Clara. Thank you, I really needed a good laugh” you said as you continued laughing.
“Oh come on! Seriously! What’s wrong with you? This guy was so fucking hot, I couldn’t believe my eyes when I went there. Almost requested a transfer instantly” Clara added and you kept laughing.
“How hot?” Sunny asked and everyone stared at her still laughing.
“Wow, I leave for a year and Sunny turns into Clara… Seungkwan, you gotta get a handle on the children” you said and Seungkwan laughed.
“Tall, muscular, Australian hunk. Sunny, literally one of the hottest men I’ve seen with my own two eyes and he was all over Y/N. I was so jealous… Why do you always get the hottest guys to be into you and you don’t even take advantage of it? Unfair” Clara answered Sunny and Sunny gasped.
“Do you have pictures?” Sunny asked.
“Of course, I have pictures of all my coworkers on my phone. Because that’s not creepy at all” you added and got up to use the restroom.
“I follow him on Instagram, let me show you” Clara said and you shook your head and continued going to the bathroom.
When you came back, Clara and Sunny were still looking at Chris’s Instagram page and drooling. They started telling you what an idiot you were for not even trying to date him and you just shrugged.
“But seriously, no boyfriends we should know about?” Shua asked and you were surprised by his question.
Everyone turned to you.
“No. Not really interested in dating at the moment. Still have a few things to resolve in that arena in my life before I even consider starting to date again” you answered honestly and you hoped Jeonghan picked up on what you were trying to say.
Shua caught that as well, smiled at you and looked at Jeonghan who was now staring at his empty plate.
Clara and Sunny booed at you and everyone moved on from that topic and continued to chat about changes or new things they purchased or hobbies they started after you left. You were trying hard to pay attention to them but you needed to talk to Jeonghan. He just didn’t seem interested in talking to you.
As you were trying to convince yourself to just go for it, Jeonghan got up and told everyone he had to leave and your heart sank. There goes your chance.
“Late date?” Clara asked as she raised her eyebrows at him and everyone laughed and started telling her off. You pretended to laugh but you didn’t find any of this funny.
“No” was all he said before saying his goodbyes and leaving. He didn’t even look at you before leaving. He was always so unfair. As far as he knows, you may never be back here again. He may never see you again. Yet, he doesn’t seem to care. He doesn’t even care enough to tell you goodbye. Maybe coming back here would be a huge mistake if this is how you’re going to feel every day.
Seokmin snapped you back from your thoughts by squeezing your hand and smiling at you. He didn’t know about you and Jeonghan but he seemed to understand your sadness at that moment while everyone else didn’t notice anything.
You thought about maybe ending the night early but that wouldn’t be fair to anyone else there so you pushed through. You also deserved to have fun with your friends. You have plenty of time to be sad when you get home.
The rest of the night went by fast. The group moved from the restaurant to a karaoke bar and everyone was having a blast. You might have had too much to drink but you needed to stop thinking about Jeonghan and focus on your friends so alcohol it is. You were going to regret this tomorrow. 
And regret it you did. You woke up with a huge hangover. Your head was pounding. Why did you drink this much? Oh yeah… Jeonghan. At least everyone seemed to have enjoyed the night. You should’ve drank more water though. You got up, took an ibuprofen, showered and decided to rest more until your headache went away. 
It sounded like a good plan and was going great until someone decided to ruin your entire mood by ringing your doorbell. You tried ignoring it and turned around on your bed to go back to sleep but the doorbell kept ringing.
You got up and went to the door. Whoever it was, they better be ready for a fight. You were tired, angry, sad and out of patience for any nonsense today.
You didn’t even check the peephole. You get to the door and you swing it open, ready to fight and when you finally see who’s on the other side, you stop.
“Not a good morning, Y/N?” Jeonghan asks, laughing lightly.
You sigh and gesture at him to come in.
“What gave it away? The disheveled hair? The swinging the door open?” you asked as you sat on the couch.
“The general rage, yes. Had a good time last night after I left, huh?” he asked and he joined you on the couch.
“I forgot how insane they are when they drink. I missed everyone so much that I let myself get carried away. Mistake”
You both laughed. And then there was silence. You couldn’t take this anymore. It was now or never.
“Why did you ignore me last night? You barely said anything or even looked at me. You didn’t even say goodbye. That could’ve been the last time you saw me and you didn’t even say anything. Why?” you asked him.
“I’ll never be able to say goodbye to you, Y/N. I couldn’t do it a year ago and I can’t do it now” he answered without hesitation.
You nodded.
“Why did you come here today? You didn’t seem to be interested in talking to me yesterday” you asked again.
“It wasn’t easy seeing you. After all this time. I went there because I needed to see you but I didn’t know if I should be there. If you wanted me there. I didn’t want to ruin your night but I couldn’t not go. I was being selfish” 
“So you decided to leave early yesterday and come here today and ruin a whole new day for me?” you asked in a playful tone but he didn’t laugh with you.
“I wanted to see you, Jeonghan. I know I wasn’t being obvious about it yesterday but everyone was there. I didn’t want to ruin the night for them. It was the first time we were all together in a long time. I couldn’t be selfish. But I wanted to be” you added to your previous statement.
He nodded.
“Then can we talk? Right now? It’s why I came here. There’s a lot of things we need to talk about. I should’ve done this earlier. Way before last year even. I’m a coward when it comes to you” Jeonghan said.
“Yes, please” you answered and you both smiled.
“I’ve never been the smoothest guy around. The guy that can easily talk to a girl he likes. I’ve always gotten weird and acted stupid. I don’t know why. And now I would like to think I’m better but back then when we met 6 years ago, I was still that stupid kid that didn’t know how to act when he liked a girl. That’s kind of why this started. Back then, when I first saw you, I wanted to get to know you more. You were so beautiful, I still remember what you were wearing the first day we met. But you didn’t seem to notice me. At all. The only time you acknowledged me was in an interdepartmental meeting when I made a snappy comment and you started getting snarky with me. I thought this was my shot. This is how you were going to notice me” he started and you scoffed.
“So you decided to be an asshole from then on? Why not just come to me and talk to me?” you asked.
“Like I said, I was a dumb kid. I wanted your attention but I wasn’t brave enough or confident enough to simply walk up to you and start a conversation so I decided having you mad at me was better than having you not know I even existed. Things went downhill fast from there. You were hating me more and more and I was… Liking you more and more. But after a year of this dynamic, I didn’t know how to stop it and just talk to you. Seungcheol always gave me so much shit for it. He kept saying I was going to regret not having talked to you and gotten to know you the proper way. That it was going to bite me in the ass and he was right” he sighed as he continued.
So that’s what Seungcheol meant when he asked you if you didn’t know why Jeonghan treated you this way. He knew all along of Jeonghan’s feelings for you and he probably thought you knew as well, somehow.
“Y/N, I’ve had feelings for you from day one. That’s why it hurt so much hearing you say you hated me even if I brought it on myself. When you gave me a chance to have you in my arms, even if it was just that night at the party, I didn’t hesitate. I couldn’t. I had wanted you for so long. Desperate for your attention. Part of me wishes I stopped myself from having you that night. I should’ve told you the truth right there but I couldn’t risk you leaving. I was selfish that night too” 
You looked down and he sighed. 
You didn’t know what to say. Even though this made sense, it also didn’t. You still had so many questions. You needed to know everything. No more fear. No more being a coward.
You looked back at Jeonghan.
“Why did you sleep with Hana then? If you had feelings for me from the start?” you asked and he laughed.
“Another stupid mistake I made because of my feelings for you” he said and you raised an eyebrow at him.
“Do you remember the only year we had the Christmas party at the office? The one where the office almost got destroyed?” he asked and you nodded.
“Before that party I promised myself I was going to talk to you. Really talk. Maybe drunkenly confess my feelings for you and hope for the best. But you spent the first few hours of that party with Jackson. Smiling and laughing and having fun and I was fucking miserable watching you two. I started drinking a bit too much and when Hana came to me I thought ‘fuck it’. If you could live your life and probably end up dating Jackson, I could fuck whoever I wanted too. I didn’t really think about the consequences of sleeping with her until it was done. She told the whole office and the look of disgust you gave me when you found out was enough for me to realize that if I hadn’t ruined all my chances with you before, I definitely had then”
“You’re an idiot” you told him.
“I know” he agreed.
“Even if you regretted it afterwards, you seemed to have a good time. She said a lot of things about that night. Hard to believe you cared about me that much but fucked her that good. Or maybe I’m just a hopeless romantic that doesn’t understand fucking without feelings” you said and you looked down.
You know you wanted the truth but you had forgotten how much the truth could hurt.
“You fucked me and you hated me though” he said and you scoffed.
“You really are an idiot…” you said and sighed.
He looked at you with a puzzled look in his eyes. 
“Don’t look so confused. I’ll explain my side soon. Continue” you told him.
“About what she said, it was all lies. I may have been drunk but I remember that night clearly. It was terrible. I didn’t even put in an effort. I didn’t care. I was picturing you the whole time, I’m actually surprised I didn’t say your name. Probably because nothing felt good. I just wanted to get it over with. When we were done, I left immediately without even saying a word to her. I was disgusted with myself. I went to sleep that night hoping you would never find out about it. You know I’m like you, I know you’ve heard it around the office too. I don’t just fuck people, I don’t do the fuck buddy thing. I’ve always been looking for the real deal. I will always regret that night” he said and you started to understand him a bit more, but there were still a couple of things on your mind when it came to Hana.
“Why let her hang around you all the time at the office? If you were mad about her telling everyone and if you really weren’t interested, why let her follow you around and grab you whenever she wants?” you asked.
He smiled at you.
“The first time she did it in front of you, it seemed like you were jealous. I didn’t know if it was wishful thinking on my part, but the look in your eye when she started touching me gave me hope. Again, I’m an idiot, I know” he answered and now it actually made you laugh lightly.
“Can’t argue with that” you said and he laughed with you.
“Last question about her and I think you know what’s coming” you said and he sighed and nodded.
“If all of this is true, what happened when I met you both at the restaurant? She said you were on a date. Why?” 
“This one is actually an easy one to answer. We were never on a date. Woozi in IT invited me out for dinner and drinks to join their team dinner since I wasn’t doing so well and I agreed. When the time of the dinner came, everyone else canceled except her so I was stuck with her. Not sure if it was her plan all along but I know Woozi wouldn’t do that to me so I guess it worked in her favor somehow. I decided to stay because I was hungry and tired and wanted a drink and then we ran into you. When she said it was a date, I really wanted to say something different but the look in your eyes… I knew I needed to explain myself outside of that situation. You weren’t going to let me do it there specially since you were late for your team dinner”
He does know you well. You would’ve left either way that night. What you still don’t understand is why he didn’t tell you all of this before you left.
“Why didn’t you tell me all of this? Why did you let me leave thinking you were fucking me while dating her?” you finally asked.
“Before that restaurant situation, you had been distancing yourself from me. I didn’t know why but I was too scared to find out. I thought maybe you were done. With us. With me. I didn’t think you would want to hear anything from me anymore. And when you also didn’t reach out or asked for an explanation about Hana, I thought that meant you didn’t care. I thought you didn’t care if I was dating her or not because we were just fucking. I thought if I reached out and told you the truth, you were going to tell me it was just sex. That it was never more than that between us. I didn’t want to hear that”
“So you let me leave? No goodbye. No explanation. Just a text. How do you think I felt when you did that?” you asked with tears in your eyes now.
“I know how much I fucked up. After sending that text and staring at my phone, I realized I would rather let you know the whole truth even if it meant you rejecting me than this. I drove to your place but when I got there, you were gone” he added and he also had tears in his eyes now.
“Why didn’t you ever call me? Or even texted me? Why not tell me all of this even if I was away?” you asked him as you cried softly.
“I didn’t think you’d want to hear from me. You had this new life now in a different city with new people. I thought you were over whatever happened with us”
“I spent this whole year thinking about you” you said and he nodded sadly.
There was a silence in the room with you now. 
He had told you the whole truth. Since the very first day. No more hiding. 
It was your turn now but you didn’t even know where to start so you told him just that.
“Thank you for telling me this now. I also have some explaining to do but I don’t even know where to start…”
“From the beginning. From when we met, please. I need to know” Jeonghan told you and you agreed.
“I thought you were the most beautiful human I’d ever seen. When we first met. I’m also not the best at talking to people I like. I usually don’t, at all. I stay away and just enjoy the person from afar. It seems easier than being rejected. Adding that to how obsessed I was with the company and being hired there, I guess it would have seemed like I didn’t notice you at all. But I did. Which is why I was so pissed every time you were an asshole to me. Not only was the career I dreamed of taking a hit but the guy I had a crush on apparently wanted to destroy my career” you said and laughed.
He laughed with you.
You were both idiots. 
“After that, I accepted that you just hated me. I had to move on or I would end up breaking my own heart. So I told myself that I hated you. I would hate you from then on and treat you exactly like you were treating me. I spent years avoiding what I really felt about you. It seemed easier that way. I needed to focus on my career and ignore whatever was going on with you. It was the smartest decision for me” you told him and continued.
“I didn’t realize all of this until I left though. Being away and getting a therapist helped me realize all of my feelings for you. Made me understand what I did wrong and what I wish I could change. Distancing myself from you after our last night here was a huge mistake. But at the time I was confused. I still thought I didn’t like you at all so how could I let you in here. I didn’t want to see the truth. I wasn’t ready for it. It’s easier now, even if it hurts, knowing exactly what my feelings for you are” you added.
“Is that why you didn’t say anything after the restaurant incident?” he asked you.
“Yeah. I had already been distant from you trying to sort out my feelings and when I saw you with her I made my decision. Maybe it was best if we stopped whatever it was we were doing. Then when we didn’t speak after that and my manager gave me the option to leave, again, it seemed easier than trying to deal with everything. I used my career as an excuse but I just wasn’t ready to face this. I am now” you answered.
You were trying to explain everything to him but sometimes it’s hard to put all of this in words. It’s been 6 years of confusion and misunderstandings. Where do you go from here?
“I don’t want to ask this but what about Jackson? What happened at the Christmas party?” he asked and it surprised you.
“Honestly I don’t even remember that party at all. I don’t remember spending that much time with Jackson. I never liked him and I always knew he was just trying to fuck me. I was nice to him at first but I guess over time I lost patience and that’s why now it may be more obvious of how not interested I am” you told him and he nodded.
“And Chris?” he asked in a more hushed voice.
You laughed.
“Chris is a great guy. And he has told me he’s interested in me. I told him no. I still had things from my past to sort out and wasn’t interested. He understood. We’re friends. Sure, he still hopes one day I’ll give him a chance but I already told him many times not to wait for that” you said and he smiled.
You smiled too.
You weren’t sure if there was anything else he wanted to know but it seems most of your past issues have been explained on both sides. Past has been resolved in a way. But what about the future? Is there a future? You’re trying to figure out how to ask this question when he interrupts your thoughts.
“What about now? What happens now? You’re still living far away, it would be tricky but I want to see you again. And a lot more. Maybe we can go back to how things were between us…” Jeonghan said and the last part he said with more nervousness in his tone.
Thing is… He still didn’t say what his feelings were. He said he liked you but that could mean anything. Now he wants to go back to how things were? No… That’s not what you want at all. You thought you had been clear.
“No, I don’t want to go back to how things were. I know that for sure” you told him and his smile fell from his face.
“Oh… Hmm… Okay… I thought that was what we both wanted. I guess I got that wrong” he said as he started to get up from the couch and move towards the door. 
“Wait, where are you going? You didn’t let me finish” you said as you followed behind him.
“No, I get it. I thought things could go back to that but they can’t. We’ve been hurting each other for so long. I wouldn’t want to be with me either. Sorry. I should go. I’m meeting Seungcheol for lunch but thanks for listening to me” he said as he left your apartment.
You were left alone, in the middle of your living room, confused and staring at your door.
‘What the hell just happened?’ you asked yourself. You thought the conversation was going well. You were both reaching an agreement so why would he leave. He didn’t even let you explain what you meant when you said you didn’t want things to go back to the way things were. Was that all he wanted from this? To explain everything and then go back to just fucking each other? Why was he always so confusing? Things between two people aren’t supposed to be this difficult. You can’t even hold a conversation without misunderstandings. How was this ever going to work?
You were left confused and wondering what any of it meant for the both of you.
The rest of the weekend went by fast. You met up with some of the guys for lunch and just to hang out and Sunday came fast. Before you knew it, it was time to leave again. You couldn’t leave without trying to understand what went wrong and what you said that made Jeonghan leave so abruptly. You decided to call him. He didn’t answer so you texted him.
“Hey, I’m sorry to bother you and do this on short notice but I would really like to see you before I have to leave today. I feel like our conversation ended and you left on another misunderstanding. Can you please, make some time for me today? I have to leave by 6PM, the latest. I’m free the rest of the day. Let me know, okay?”
Nothing.
He didn’t answer the text. He never called you back. 
It was 6:30PM and you were still in your apartment staring at your phone, waiting for him.
Crying, you pick up your bags and get ready to leave.
This would never work. He is unable to resolve things by talking. He always runs away from you. You would end up getting your heart broken in the future.
Not that your heart isn’t broken right now. You opened up to him and told him the whole truth and somehow he chose to listen to the wrong thing and leave. This time you were proud of yourself though. You reached out to him and you tried to resolve everything before having to leave again. It was his choice to not listen. There’s only so much you can do. Relationships are a two way street. You can’t keep fighting for something while the other person simply gives up and walks away. It’s exhausting and you will always end up in tears. 
Maybe this was for the best.
That four hour drive was done listening to sad songs and trying to tell yourself you’ll be just fine. You still had no fucking clue of what you wanted to do. Even though you had an amazing time with everyone including the new guy, this situation with Jeonghan might prove to be a little too much for you to handle. 
You needed to sleep on this and hope your boss didn’t ask you for your answer first thing in the morning.
The next day you went to work and went back to normal. The usual meetings, usual coachings, usual schedule. It felt normal. 
By the end of the day you still didn’t know what to do. You missed everything about the other branch, city and people. But you didn’t know if your heart could take any more hits. Going back there wasn’t going to be easy.
You were split. 
It was the end of the day and you were packing up to go home. Your boss hasn’t mentioned it at all. You talked about work during the day and he checked-in with you and the team but he didn’t ask you anything else. You felt relieved. Maybe he would give you more time before making a final decision.
As you reached for the door of your office to leave, there’s a knock.
It was your boss.
Fuck. You knew it was too good to be true.
“Hey again, Y/N. Going home?” he asked you.
“Yup. Not a fan of overtime especially when the work's all done” you told him and you both laughed.
“Look, I don’t want to pressure you but we have their branch breathing down our necks. They need an answer asap. I assume you don’t have one yet since you didn’t talk to me about it but just a heads up, they might contact you directly if you take too long deciding” he let you know and you sighed.
“I want to go back. Nothing against this branch but it’s just a bit too slow paced for me. You’re a great manager and I’ve really enjoyed my time here but it’s been difficult adjusting even to my apartment. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier today. Not gonna lie, before this moment, I had no clue what I wanted but as soon as you asked me I knew what the answer was” you answered him and he laughed.
“I get it. You and that team are the dream team. Hard to move on from that when that’s what you love. I don’t hold it against you. We can let the team here know tomorrow so that you can start helping Chris with stepping into the role, is that okay?”
“Of course but this soon? When do I have to leave by?” you asked a bit surprised on how fast this was moving.
“They want you back there asap. I don’t blame them either. I’ll let them know of your decision and let’s say two weeks? Would that be enough time for Chris to get prepared? What do you think as his current team lead?”
“That’s more than enough time. Like I told you before, Chris was already aware and saw me do a lot of the team lead’s tasks. It should be an easy adjustment for him” you said and he nodded.
“Alright, then! Have a good night and we’ll meet with your team first thing in the morning” your manager told you as he walked out with you.
“One more thing… Can we not tell the team over there? I wanted to surprise them, if that’s okay?” you asked your manager and he laughed again.
“I’m okay with it. Let me ask them over there and I’ll let you know tomorrow, yeah?” he answered you and you nodded.
You got to your apartment, sat down on the couch and started laughing.
You have no idea what came over you but when your manager asked what you wanted to do, you couldn’t help but say you wanted to go back. This whole thing with Jeonghan won’t be easy and you will hurt but at least you’ll be around the people you love most in the world, in your comfy home that you love so much.
You couldn’t wait to leave.
The next two weeks went by so slow. Every day seemed to drag on forever. This was how bad you wanted to go back. 
Your team was sad but they understood your decision and they were also super excited about having Chris step up. 
You spent those two weeks helping Chris and preparing him for the role and by the end he was full on taking care of the team while you shadowed along. Maybe that’s why the days went by even slower at the end. You were watching Chris do your job and reporting to your manager but you weren’t doing much more.
Your manager was able to convince the other branch about keeping this a secret for now. Seungkwan was informed and he also promised to not say anything since he knew what this meant for you all. He may have only spent that one night around all of you but it was clear to him you belonged there with the team and that he still had a lot to learn before stepping up at that branch.
It was difficult not to say anything in the group chat specially since your team figured out some moves in the team were going to happen but they just didn’t know what and they kept talking about it and speculating. They were suspicious it had to do with Seungkwan since they all filed the same complaint with HR but they weren’t sure since Seungkwan wouldn’t tell them either.
The day before you left you had dinner with Chris and the boys to say goodbye. They were a great team, really. You just didn’t belong here with them. You hoped the best for them and you knew Chris would grow a lot more in the future if he kept working the way he had.
The next day you drove home. Home. Felt good to say and to think about. You couldn’t wait to get there. 
You had to be careful once you got there though. You didn’t want to get caught and be told on before Monday. Clara lives very close to you so grocery shopping was going to be a risk but you had to risk it because there was no way you weren’t going to cook and enjoy some nice home cooked meals. 
Those days went by fast and so far no one had found out you were back and would be back working at the branch.
When you got to the office, you went straight to your manager’s office and as soon as you walked in, you two shared a huge hug. She had missed you just as much as you had missed her. Having another woman team lead to fight Jeonghan’s manager was much needed since he had been on a whole other level after you left.
Part of you thinks your manager asked the whole office to join the meeting so that she could rub it in his face that you were back permanently to make his life hell if needed.
The time for the meeting was finally here and your heart was beating fast. You’re excited to see your team’s reaction but also you can’t deny that you want to see how Jeonghan reacts. 
How can something so simple be so terrifying?
When everyone was gathered in the big conference room, your manager started the meeting by saying there would be a few changes happening in the marketing team. She kept her speech short and gave Seungkwan the floor.
“So as you guys know, I transferred here from a much slower branch. When I was team lead there things were very different. I adjusted well and got along well with everyone. Here, things have been tricky. Even though I get along with my team on a personal level, things have been less than ideal on a professional level. When all of this became clear to all of us, I was approached by my manager and I was informed I was going to be replaced here as team lead. I could either choose to stay here as a member of the marketing team, or go back to my previous branch as team lead” he paused then and everyone started looking around in confusion. Probably because they knew you were the team lead at that branch so what did this all mean?
“Well, I chose to stay here as a team member. I wanted to learn from the new team lead whoever that was. Initially I didn’t know who that was. The final decision hadn’t been made but once I found out who it was, I was incredibly happy to be working and learning from her. I don’t want to prolong this anymore than I already have so let’s all please, welcome the new team lead for our marketing team!” he said and started clapping.
Everyone else joined and started to look around trying to find the person who was replacing Seungkwan. 
You got in the room from behind your manager and as soon as Hoshi’s eyes landed on you, he ran to you and picked you up while screeching like an insane bird.
“Put me down, you maniac!” you said and as soon as he did everyone from your team ran up to hug you.
“Better surprise than last time?” you asked and they all nodded.
You were all in your little world and your manager interrupted you.
“Not to ruin this family reunion but do you have a few words for everyone?” she asked.
“I’m not very good at these things as you probably found out last time so I don’t have a lot to say. It was a good experience over there but not enough for me professionally. Also I missed my team and my home. And now I’m back so I’m looking forward to working and/or fighting some of you” you said and everyone laughed. 
You found Jeonghan in the back behind everyone. He had a blank expression on his face and as soon as your manager told everyone they could go, he was the first one out the door.
You were disappointed but not surprised. This reaction was very him.
Shua, Wonwoo and Seungcheol ran up to you and welcomed you back. Told you they missed you. Silvia was a bit more chill about it but you could tell she was happy mostly because Seokmin was happy to have you back. You’ll take it either way.
From then on everything went back to normal. Usual team meetings, usual interdepartmental meetings, usual lunch with everyone. After three weeks, it felt like you had never left. Seungkwan was a great addition to your team just like you thought. He may have not been ready for the team lead position but he was an extraordinary team member to your team.
Everything went back to what it was supposed to be. You were so happy to be back even if things with Jeonghan stayed the same. He never answered that text and never called you back and ever since you came back, he never spoke to you. You talked during meetings but about work only. He seemed to have found a good balance of being an asshole and simply accepting your teams’ proposals when they made perfect sense. Everything was going great but somehow, when you were alone in your office and at home, you still felt empty.
Right now you were in your office, looking out the window. The day has been going okay so far, you just didn’t feel good. It seems the more time passes like this between you and Jeonghan, the worse you feel every single day. 
As you were almost falling asleep in your chair staring out the window, there was a knock at your door. You asked them to come in and to your surprise, Shua walks through the door.
“May I come in and sit? Do you have a few minutes to chat, Y/N?”
“Hmm… Yeah, go ahead. Surprisingly, it’s been a slow day. What do you need to talk to me about? Is it about the Privé campaign proposal?”
“Actually it’s not work related. It’s personal” he said and you started to get nervous.
You gulped.
“Okay” was all you said.
“Look, I don’t know how your conversation went the last time you were here before you moved back but he’s been miserable since then. From what I can tell so far, you haven’t been doing much better so forgive my intrusion but what the hell happened that day?” Shua asked and you just broke down.
You started sobbing. He locked your office door and came back to you to hug you. 
You got up from the chair and you both moved to the couch in your office.
“Sorry” you said as he handed you the tissue box from your desk before sitting back down again next to you.
“I don’t know what happened. We were talking and then he just left out of nowhere. Then Sunday I asked him to meet with me so we could fix whatever misunderstanding this was and he ignored both my call and text. He hasn’t spoken to me since that day. I wanted to know what made him leave but he won’t give me the chance” you told him and you tried to stop crying.
“He told me you confessed to him and then turned him down. It didn’t make sense to me at the time but he’s sure you rejected him” Shua said and you looked back at him confused.
“I didn’t reject him, Shua. I told him no when he asked if things could go back to the way they were before with us because that’s not what I want. I… Have feelings for him. Why would I want to go back to being fuck buddies or whatever the fuck we were before?” you asked and you hoped he would understand what you meant.
“You love him and you wanted a relationship… You weren’t rejecting him, you were rejecting being fuck buddies…” he said as he looked around and scoffed.
“Love is a strong word” you told him and sighed.
“Is it though? Look at you two. You’re both miserable and for what? You should be together, Y/N. How much longer are you going to keep hurting each other?” he asked and you got offended.
“Hurting each other? He’s the one that keeps making shit decisions and not listening to me. Even when I reach out to him, he pushes me away. He’s the one constantly breaking my heart and I’m the one stupid enough to keep letting him” you said as you got up back to your desk.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for it to sound that way. I’m just tired of watching you both fight this. I know you’re tired of trying and being the one pushing but maybe you should do it one last time. Tell him what you told me and make sure he understands you can’t be the only one fighting for the two of you. That he can’t run away any time he thinks he heard something he doesn’t like”
“Is it worth it, Shua? To keep fighting? There’s always been misunderstandings between us, something always happens to break us apart. Maybe it’s a sign we just shouldn’t be together. Being with someone shouldn’t be this difficult. I know a good relationship means hard work but this is too much. I can’t keep fighting for someone who just runs away every time. Just avoids the issue and ignores me. No relationship can survive that”
“I’m a firm believer that nothing good comes easy. You have to put in the work. And I know he fucked up more than once and you’ve been the one carrying all of this but are you really going to let him go just because of this? A silly misunderstanding about him not getting you wanted a relationship? Think about it. He’s a literal man, Y/N. He needs things spelled out to him most times, specially when it comes to the person he loves most in the world. You’ve been through so much together that his mind just picks the negative and runs. It’s not your fault but if you think this relationship could be the real deal, try one more time. Tell him everything. Clearly, with no room for misunderstandings”
You nodded and he nodded back.
He got up to leave and as he was unlocking your office door and leaving he turned back.
“Just think about it, please, Y/N” he said and left.
When you got home that night, it was all you could think about. 
You wish you could ask someone. You had never told anyone about you and Jeonghan so you didn’t have anyone to talk to about this and share their opinion. You didn’t know if you should either. This is a decision you need to make by yourself. 
You spent the night thinking it over and you decided it was time to be brave and grow up. You wouldn’t do this through text or call. Tomorrow morning you were going straight to his office and you’re going to lay your cards on the table. You’re going to tell him what an asshole he is and that this is his last chance. If he wants it, he’ll have to put in the work from now on. No more running. No more ignoring you. Open communication or it’s not even worth starting anything back up between the two of you.
You couldn’t sleep very well. You woke up nervous and angry. You rushed to the office so you could be there early and talk to him before the day started. But of course, nothing ever goes to plan when it comes to Jeonghan, and your manager called you in to talk about the new accounts that were joining the company and what you and your team should expect from them. 
By the time you and your manager were done with that small meeting, everyone was already in the office and working hard. Shit. Should you do this now or later? Fuck it, you need this to be over with. You can’t suffer like this anymore.
You went to his office and of course, the first thing you are greeted with is Hana with her paws all over him, twirling his tie in her hand and laughing. He looked bored. He was leaning against his desk. He still let her do it though and you were beyond angry. 
You knocked on his open door and cleared your throat. 
He looked up and when he saw it was you, he gulped and tried moving away from Hana.
“Can’t you see we’re busy?” Hana asked you with disdain. 
You’re being tested. ‘Please, do not choose murder, please. Stay calm’ you told yourself as you walked in his office towards them.
“Hands off and fuck off, Hana. Don’t you have work to do? As far as I know this is a fucking office so act professional and not like a hormonal teenager or I’ll report you to your team lead and to HR” you told her and she gasped. 
Jeonghan just kept looking between the two of you and removed his tie from her hand.
“Jeonghan, say something!” she said as she turned to him and crossed her arms.
You looked at Jeonghan with a tilted head and raised your eyebrows.
“Get out, Hana. Go back to work. You shouldn’t have been here in the first place” he told her as he finally moved away from her completely and sat down on his desk chair.
She scoffed, flipped her hair, looked you up and down and finally left.
You closed his office door behind her and turned back to him.
“Am I just going to have to see that forever or do you plan on telling her to stop it anytime soon? I guess old habits die hard, huh?” you asked as you sat down in front of him.
“I’m sorry” was all he told you.
“Getting fucking sick of hearing that. I need to talk to you and you seem to ignore me through text and phone calls and even around here so you left me no choice. Do you have time now or do you want me to leave?” you asked and he stayed silent.
“Just know that if you tell me to leave, it will be the last fucking time I’ll give you the chance to push me away, so choose wisely” you continued and waited for his answer.
He continued to stay silent.
So be it.
You got up and started to leave his office.
“Stop, please. I’m sorry. Stay. Yes. Let’s talk” he said as he grabbed your hand and pulled you back, closer to him.
“I’m going to make this simple. Joshua talked to me yesterday. He told me you said I rejected you. You really need to start listening to what I say, Jeonghan. I didn’t reject you or your feelings. What I told you was that I did not want to go back to being fuck buddies. I wanted more for us. But you didn’t let me say that. You just got up and left with an assumption that I was rejecting you” you said and you could see the cogs starting to turn in his brain. He was realizing he had fucked up yet again.
“And because I was confused and didn’t understand why you left the way you did, I reached out to you. I wanted to talk it over before I left. I wanted to make everything clear between us and you ignored me again. I waited for you in my home and you didn’t even text back. That really fucking hurt” you continued and you started to cry now.
“You know that weekend I had already been given a choice to either stay there or come back here. After what happened with us, after you broke my heart again, I almost stayed there. But I chose to come back because I was always happier here. Whatever was going on with us, I couldn’t let that stop me so I came back. And you didn’t give a shit. You were the first to leave the meeting and you haven’t spoken a word to me in weeks”
You were getting angrier now. He needed to understand this was his absolute last chance and you were going to make sure you got through to him.
“When Shua talked to me yesterday, he said I should try one more time. Telling you everything clearly so that were no more misunderstandings. I didn’t want to. I can’t be the only one fighting and pushing through the misunderstandings. We can’t keep having these misunderstandings. I deserve better than getting hurt all the time because you won’t talk to me. You just run and ignore the issue and break both of our hearts. You need to choose, Jeonghan. Either you start taking responsibility and we start a mature relationship where we talk to each other about everything that is bothering us or maybe, if you don’t think it’s worth it or you’re not strong enough, we just end everything now. Completely. We’ll be nothing more than coworkers”
This was it. 
You were done.
He had all the information he needed to make his choice. 
No more ambiguity, no more uncertainty. He needed to choose to either fight for your relationship and stop being scared or let you go.
“You don’t have to answer me right now but--”
He stopped you from talking by kissing you. 
His hands were holding your face as he kissed you and you kissed him right back.
You missed him so much. He was such an asshole for torturing you both.
He backed you both up against the back wall of his office and he kept kissing you hard. 
You stayed like that for a while. Until your phone started to ring in your pocket.
It was Hoshi. He probably couldn’t find you and he needed you. 
“I need to go” you whispered against his lips and he kissed you again.
You started laughing.
“Seriously, I have to go. That’s a yes on the relationship then?” you asked, still holding him.
“Fuck yes, absolutely. I will never let you down again, that’s a fucking promise, angel”
“It better be. Let’s take it slow, yeah? I know that’s a bit of a cliché but I want us to start fresh. Going on dates, getting to know each other. Since we’re both hopeless romantics after all” you said and you both smiled.
“Anything you want, angel”
You left his office and met with Hoshi who was freaking out about something Seungkwan had said. These two will drive you insane but nothing matters right now. All you can think about is Jeonghan. You wondered how things were going to progress between you two from now on.
After a few weeks, you and Jeonghan were doing great. He started by leaving you coffee on your desk every morning with a note and he always checked on you during the day. You had lunch together every day (with your teams but still) and he took you out on dates almost every day. 
It may have been too much for some people but you wanted to spend as much time with him as possible and he felt the same. You had dinner together almost every day and you spent the weekends together. You had gone to amusement parks, gone on hikes, you had picnics by the river and so many other good things. 
You were slowly getting to know each other and your feelings for him were growing more and more every day. You hoped he felt the same way. 
You had been honest with each other about everything. You told him you needed him to put a stop to Hana following him around and being all over him. It made you uncomfortable and he agreed that was a door he needed to close permanently for both of you but also for Hana’s sake. So she could move on. He always talked to you every time he felt insecure or scared and you helped him through it. Your dynamic stayed the same. Always challenging each other and being snarky but you both loved it that way.
You had even met each others’ families already. It was funny watching your families react to you and him dating. You both talked so much shit about each other to your families that everyone was confused when you told them. His sister seemed to be the only one that knew this was exactly how you and him were going to end up.
There were a few things you haven’t done so far. You haven’t told anyone in the office, well except Shua and Seungcheol. And, you haven’t slept together yet. It just didn’t happen. You had been so focused on doing things right and getting to know him that that part hadn’t really been on your mind too much. You already knew that side of him and sure, you missed it but you didn’t want to rush anything. He seemed to feel the same way since he hadn’t made any moves towards that at all. You also haven’t told each other those three words. You wanted to. You knew you loved him. It was clear. It had been clear for a while but you were still scared about that. He hasn’t said them either which has surprised you so far but you understand. He’s probably just as scared as you are.
Next Friday was the regularly scheduled end of quarter party at your company. It was at the usual place, at the usual time and you wanted to be able to enjoy it with Jeonghan but the office still doesn’t know so you decided to ask him about it.
You went to his office during the day and brought it up.
“I was thinking… Maybe we can tell people… In the office… I wanted to go with you to the party and I can’t do that if we keep hiding this…”
“I would like that very much. I’ve wanted to do that since day one, angel”
You smiled and kissed him.
He pulled you closer to stand between his legs and you made a bolder move and straddled him on his desk chair while you kept kissing.
He pulled away from you and held your face with his hands. You moved to kiss him again and he laughed and stopped you.
“Hey… Look at me, angel…” 
You stared into his eyes deeply.
“I love you, Y/N” he said and he gulped. He was nervous. It was the cutest thing you’ve ever seen in your fucking life. You smiled hard.
“I love you too, Jeonghan”
He smiled just as hard as you and he started to kiss you again. Hard. One of his hands had now moved to your ass and he was pushing you on his cock. He was hard. You telling him you loved him back got him hard. That was fucking hot.
Your kiss started to get more and more heated but neither of you could stop. Not now knowing that you loved each other. Finally hearing it from each others lips was the last straw and you got reminded of how much you missed fucking him. You could feel how desperate he was for you too and you both just couldn’t stop what was happening, neither did you want to.
“Y/N, we need your approval on this. Can you--”
Hoshi and your team barged into Jeonghan’s office and you jumped away from Jeonghan so fast. But not fast enough. Jeonghan started laughing and moving his chair towards his desk to cover his very prominent boner.
You were all silent. Hoshi, Seokmin and Seungkwan looked horrified while Clara and Sunny were smirking behind them.
“Hey, what’s going on? Why is everyone just standing here?” Joshua asked as he walked by Jeonghan’s office and saw the crowd.
He looked into the office and immediately realized you two had been caught red-handed. 
“Oh… You should really lock your doors, guys” he said as he laughed and Jeonghan laughed with him. You affectionately slapped his shoulder for him to stop.
“I need to go wash my eyes” Hoshi said but didn’t move.
“I knew it! I mean I didn’t know it but very nice, Y/N. We have to talk” Clara added and Sunny laughed and nodded.
You rolled your eyes and smiled.
“This isn’t how I wanted you to find out. We were actually going to tell you about it today” you said.
“Before or after you defiled his office?” Seokmin asked you and everyone laughed.
“Definitely after” Jeonghan answered and you were ready to kick his ass.
“Come on, let’s get back to work. We can talk about it later” you said and started to leave. You gestured at your team to follow you.
“Oh we’re talking now, screw work” Sunny said and everyone agreed.
“This is why I didn’t tell you sooner” you added and they all laughed.
You told them the truth about everything with you and Jeonghan. Except what Clara and Sunny wanted to know. That, you didn’t say shit about. They were not happy about it. 
Nothing changed from then on out. Everyone knew but it didn’t change any dynamic. Just some added jokes about you two angry fucking each other after your usual disagreements at interdepartmental meetings. 
You also informed HR about your relationship and followed all the right steps. Soon enough, everyone at the office knew. Most people were surprised but nice about it. There were a few that were angry and doing their best to ruin your relationship either by creating rumors or trying to get in between you two. Hana and Jackson. Jackson was being an asshole but he wasn’t pushing anyones boundaries or creating issues. Hana on the other hand, was trying her best to ruin this for you two.
She started rumors about him still fucking her. She constantly tried to touch him and follow him around. It was frustrating but all you could do was report her to HR and move on. It had only been a few days but she was working hard trying to break you two up. It didn’t matter. You trusted Jeonghan and he always stopped her and her rumors whenever he heard them. You two agreed she would eventually stop. This was still fresh to everyone and she needed to get it out of her system. 
You and Jeonghan were really good now and nothing she could do would change that.
Friday came fast and you were excited. This quarter was a rollercoaster but you were happy to be back here at this branch with the people you loved, in your home that you loved so much as well.
Jeonghan joined you and Clara in the Uber and you met up with everyone there.
You sat at the same table you had last time, with the same people, but so much has changed. 
This time around, you were in love with the one you claimed to hate before. You were here with him and you were going to enjoy this completely. 
Everyone was drinking and having fun. Dinner and the awards started and it was just as fun as you remembered. You had gone to a few end of quarter parties at the other branch and you never had this much fun. This was the best. This was where you belonged. With these people. With this team. With him. You were so happy right now, words couldn’t begin to explain it.
The awards had just ended and they were getting ready for the DJ set to start and you decided to get a refill on your drink. 
When you came back to the table, Jeonghan wasn’t there. You checked your phone just in case and he had texted you.
“Join me. You know where”
You smiled and got up to go meet Jeonghan in the room you first started this whole thing in.
You walked in and locked the door behind you.
Jeonghan was sitting on the sofa by the window that you sat on last time. He was in the dark again, just like last time. 
You walked towards him and sat down on the opposite end of the sofa, looking out the window.
He looked at you and you smiled still staring at the window.
“Getting sentimental, baby?” you asked, still looking out the window.
“Hopeless romantic. Remember, angel?” he asked and you laughed.
You looked at him and you stayed there looking at each other silently for a while until he sat up.
“Come closer, angel. You’re too far away from me”
You moved closer to him. As close as you could. He pushed your hair behind your ear and kissed you. Softly. Like he was scared you were going to break. This felt different. He was trying to show you in actions how he felt about you. You kissed him back and held his free hand in yours.
He started to deepen the kiss and you let him. 
You moved to lay down and pulled him with you. 
He was on top of you kissing you and you locked your legs around his waist. 
You were already wet and he was hard. It had been too long since you had been together like this. You were being desperate for him and you knew he felt the same.
You reached down and started stroking his cock through his clothes and he whined.
“Don’t play with me, angel” he told you as he stopped kissing you.
You continued to stroke him through his clothes and he was panting and moaning into your mouth. You bit your lip. He was so sexy. You were losing your mind.
He pulled your hand away from his cock and pushed your dress up your body. 
Jeonghan took your panties off and put them in his jacket pocket. From his other jacked pocket, he took out a condom and threw his jacket on the floor. 
He moved down and kissed your thighs and your mound. Close to where you wanted him but not quite there. After a while of this, he started to leave bruises on your thighs. Fuck, you were wetter and wetter.
“I can see you clenching around nothing, angel. Are you that desperate for me?”
“Yes… Hannie, please… No more waiting…” you told him breathlessly.
“Fuck…”
He got up from the sofa and took his pants and underwear off. He moved back to the sofa and started fingering you slowly. He kept kissing your neck and all you did was moan and run your hands through his hair. He started scissoring his fingers inside you. He was impatient and you both knew it had been a while. He wanted to be inside you now and he needed to make sure he wasn’t going to hurt you.
“I love you” you moaned.
He stopped kissing your neck and kissed your lips deeply again. More forceful this time around.
He pulled away.
“I love you too, Y/N” 
He put the condom on and started to tease your hole with his cock.
You whined.
“I don’t want to hurt you, angel. It’s been a while. Let me know if it’s too much, yeah?”
“Just get inside me, please… You’re driving me crazy, Hannie”
“Will you be a good angel for me then?” 
“Always” you moaned and he pushed the head of his cock inside of you. 
He was going slow. Rubbing circles on your clit, kissing you and with every stroke he pushed more of his cock inside you.
You started getting louder as he got deeper inside you.
“Not gonna gag me this time?” you asked and he laughed.
He moved closer to your lips.
“Let them hear it” he whispered and you both laughed together.
You pulled him down for a kiss and he pushed his cock all the way in until he bottomed out. You were moaning together against each other's lips.
After a few seconds, he started his pace.
Short, deep strokes, hitting the right spot. He knew your body so well. He still remembered exactly what to do to drive you crazy. 
You were both loud. Moaning and panting. Not giving a shit about anyone outside of that room.
He grabbed one of your hands and interlaced it with his.
He kept fucking you hard and whispering how much he loved you. You whispered  and moaned it back to him.
You were both close and you knew it.
He increased the pace of his fingers on your clit and increased the pace of his strokes as well. 
You started squeezing his cock and you could feel yourself closer and closer.
Jeonghan squeezed your hand and moved to whisper in your ear.
He told you he loved you but when he said he would never let you go again, it pushed you over the edge and you came. Hard. It felt different this time. More tangible. Stronger. 
When you came down from your high, his strokes were slower and he was looking in your eyes. 
You pulled him in to lay on top of you and held him impossibly close.
Much like he did to you, you whispered in his ear and told him how much you loved him. That you wanted to be in his arms forever. And he emptied himself into the condom with a moan of your name.
This time around you laid there together. Just holding each other.
There was no rush. No weirdness. Just two people that loved each other and had finally found their way back to each other.
You didn’t know what was going to happen in the future. 
You knew it wasn’t going to be easy. Nothing ever is with Jeonghan. But it certainly is worth it.
As you lay there with him you start thinking about the day you left. 
About how you thought you were both just passing through each other's lives. 
 At that time it seemed that way.
He was just a boy creating chaos in your life for a while and you were just a girl that left and used your career as an excuse.
Now you know how wrong you were. How sad and miserable your life would have been without him in it. Without him with you. Just like this. Every day.
You know that from now on, you weren’t just another person passing through each other’s lives. You were everything in each other’s lives. You were both where you belonged.
With each other. Always together, and never to be apart again.
IT’S FINALLY HERE AND IT’S A MONSTER AGAIN Another rollercoaster of emotions 😭 I hope you love this as much as I loved writing it 💕 As usual, please let me know in the comments and such if you enjoyed reading it <3  Thank you for supporting me! Happy holidays! 🎆 CHEERS 🥂
Taglist (if you requested specifically): @woofie-nctzen-fanarts, @lovrchl, @lockburn-castle, @luchiet, @deeznutzaintnutting, @cheesytangerine, @avocifera, @odetoyeonjun, @listxn, @gyubbgist, @cvpidxo, @leicy0756, @sunflowergyeomie, @whore4stucky9104, @bangtanskz, @cecefarm, @staurdvst, @haahydvhkmhhn, @tsukkisdoll, @miniseokminnies, @namjinsworld
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bbykento · 9 months
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LOSING A BET - Sub! Gojo x Dom! M. reader
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wc. 1.2k, not proofread
contents! mlm, male reader, public nudity, exhibitionism, edging, male orgasm, dirty talk, sort of praising, tummy bulging, lil bit of food play, no preps for his ass.
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He was doomed for… he lost the bet.
What bet did he lose to? Well let’s start from the top…
“Since you’re sooo confident that you can last long without me, let’s make a bet. Or are you too much of a pussy hm?” You say, a grin forms on your face.
“What is there that I can’t do?” He says cockily
“I’m sure this will challenge you.. one week without masturbating or any sort of sexual pleasure, I’ll do whatever you want.”
“What’s the catch?”
“If you lose, we’ll go on a date… while you’re butt-naked. Deal?”
“Is that one of your kinks?” he laughed.
“Maybe… Well?” you waited for his answer…
He contemplated, but then agreed later on. what could go wrong, right?
.
.
.
Fuck. this went so bad. he thought he could do it, his ego has gotten the best of him. It’s only been a day and he was already rock hard.
It’s even more painful when he didn’t have the time nor the privacy to release himself from all that tension. But not wanting to give in, he decided to endure the pain and embarrassment until the end of the bet…
Things get worse for him, after one 5 days, he couldn’t take it anymore. this. is. torture. he started to feel urges, emotions, everything… things he’s never felt before..
Just when he managed to survive the 6th day, he lost it. You wouldn’t know if he’s masturbating right? You’re away you wouldn’t know.. would you?
But when you come home early, you find him panting on the bed and an ‘eager puppy dog look’ on his face. A naked little puppy who wants nothing more than a master to fuck him…
“Finally given up?~” You say with a smirk.
He looks up to you, whimpering and nodding his head. “I know I’ve lost the bet but p-please, can’t take it a-anymore~” he whines.
You smiled at him as you approach him slowly. Like a predator hunting it’s prey. He blushes as he wraps his arms around you.
The anticipation makes him moan louder, not caring about anyone else hearing them… just as long as he gets what he wants.
His hips slowly grind on yours, massaging your cock against the cloth with each movement. “You know the consequences right?” he nods just wanting to be fucked already.
.
.
.
.
Today was the day of your date after gojo had officialy lost the bet..
As a result, gojo was fully butt-naked in the park. to his luck, there weren’t many people. you guys settled for a picnic on the grass, everything was settled.
“How do you like it being butt-naked outside?” you whisper in his ears, sending shivers to his body. “Do you like the idea of getting caught naked?” you began to tease his hard nipples.
Gojo's heart began to race as he felt the softness of your lips on his body. he had been waiting for this moment for days, ever since the bet. he had lost and now he had to face the consequences, but being with you was worth it.
He could feel your hand exploring his body, sending waves of pleasure through him. he was feeling more aroused with every second that passed. you were pushing him to the limits of his own pleasure.
“Do you like being exposed like this?” you asked him, while your hands were still exploring his body. gojo couldn't find the words to answer. he closed his eyes and enjoyed the feeling of your hands on him. he could feel the wind against his skin. Your hands moved down and started exploring his ass. he couldn't help but moan out loud. It felt like his body was ready to explode. you were pushing him to the edge and he was loving it. you moved your hands even further down and started to massage his inner thigh. Gojo couldn't take it any longer. he grabbed your hand and pulled you closer. you grabbed the honey jar and spilled some on him as you licked on it seductively.
“All fours baby.” he obeys as you slap the fats of his ass, while his back arches for more of your touches.
You spread his cheeks to see his cute, tight little asshole. he could feel the cold air, hardening his cock and nipples. you lube your cock before you enter in him slowly, teasing his ass with only your tip. you grunt, seeing the head of your cock disappearing bit by bit. you slowly move in and out, not fully inserting it.
“N-name, ahn~ M-more fuuck~” he was breathing heavily. “Please?~ Ah!-“ he was cut off by the sudden thrust.
Holy shit. It was tight and warm, you could feel him clamp down on you. not wanting you to get out. you slowly roll your hips in and out and slap his ass watching it jiggle.
“Feel so good.. mm~” you turn his head sideways to give him a messy kiss. every thrust made his eyes roll to the back of his head. fuck did it feel so good.
“H-harder!~ mm.. ngh!~”
His mind was clouded by nothing else but the feeling of your cock inside of him. your tip hits his prostrate for the hundredth time, making him arch his back and clench down.
“Fuuck-“ you grunt. he was like a cat in heat. wanting to get you deeper than you already were. with every thrust you make, you push it in even deeper. your balls slap against him making a loud sound.
“How do you like it getting fucked in public? You want them to watch me fuck your brains out?” you went even deeper. he could feel it in his fucking stomach. his legs were shaking, he was gonna collapse at any moment. your cock makes an evident bulge in his stomach when you thrust.
Your grip on his love handles were surely gonna leave a bruise. you bite down hard on his neck
“G-gonna cum~ ha..ah!” he managed to mutter. you continue on with the same pace while teasing his tip with your thumb, moving your hand up and down while fucking him.
“fuu… ‘m close baby just wait~ clench down harder could you?” as he clenches even more, your cock throbs. the pressure was building up, the lube made it so slippery and warm.
You push in really deep before finally come undone inside him, thick ropes of cum filling him up. your cock gets harder and it feels even tighter inside him as you feel it pulse.
Gojo came with you, some of his cum landing on your hand, some on the food, and the picnic mat. He pants heavily, oh was he tired. But you weren’t done yet, no where near done.
You pull out, receiving a whine from him before you immediately turn him around and thrust back into him within seconds.
“You tired baby?~ we’re not done yet.” you pull out slowly, and slammed it inside again. you lean in for a kiss, sucking his tongue and exploring all of him. no part of him was left untouched.
fuck was it so hot inside of him, your dick was sensitive but it was pleasurable. he was milking your dick so hard. his legs lock you in and pull you even closer.
The food being no longer remembered as you continued to fuck..
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Note: Hello, I hope you enjoyed! This is my first request, I’ve been trying to improve my writing style. Please feel free to give suggestions thank you 🫶
©bbykento. please don’t copy, translate, repost my works. reblogs/likes are appreciated!
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lucyrose191 · 5 months
Text
NO LONGER HIS| T.WOLFF
Pairing; Toto Wolff x Ex!wife!reader
Summary; Toto now has to face the consequences of his actions that tore your family apart.
Warnings; angst, heartbreak
F1 Master List
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You loved him more than anything, supported him through everything and sacrificed way more than you should have.
You had given him your all but it hadn’t been enough.
Your family hadn’t been enough for him.
He had made you feel like a queen the entire time you were married; you couldn’t deny that there were hardships when he was travelling the world and you were left to deal with your own heavily demanding job whilst also raising your son, but even through that you had never expected the heartbreak he had caused you.
You had never in your life thought that Toto could break you the way he did but it was really just a lesson learnt that you don’t really know someone as well as you think you do.
That night when he came home you could immediately tell that something was wrong, that something had happened and so you had put Jack to bed early before going back downstairs to ask him what the problem was.
You would never forget the words he muttered that night, they still replayed in your head over and over again, tormenting you sleep and acting like a rain cloud hovering over your head as you tried to go about your day.
"I slept with Lara."
Your heart had dropped as he spoke those words, it was as though the entire world had came crashing down onto your body.
You knew Lara.
Lara, his assistant that had looked you straight in the eye each time they spoke and treated you with nothing but kindness.
She had been very kind. Kind enough to fuck your husband.
You didn’t speak, simply stared at him as you processed the situation. Strangely, you didn’t feel anger, you felt many things; sadness, disappointment, loads and loads of betrayal but no anger because you were never one to get angry. Seemingly even when the man in front of you had torn your family apart.
The remorse was clear as day on his face but it made you feel nothing, you had no forgiveness for him.
That night, Toto had crawled into your cold bed, his chest heavy when you didn’t subconsciously turn over and cuddle into him, instead you remained facing away for him, body rigid and uncomfortable.
The next morning, Toto had woken to an empty bed and an empty house. You had risen at some point during the night and quietly packed your bags and left, taking Jack with you.
On his nightstand, you had left him a note.
The divorce papers are on the dining table, I don’t want anything so all you need to do is sign. I’ll be in touch about co-parenting schedules.
I hope she was worth breaking our family apart
It had taken four lines for him to realise the severity of what he had done.
It has taken four words for you.
Travelling around the world with your ex husband wasn’t ideal but since your job was flexible, only needing to make the occasional trip back to England to go into the office, it made sense to do it.
It was painful in the beginning, more than painful but it allowed Toto to remain with Jack and you weren’t the type of person to stop your son seeing his father just because of the pain he caused you.
Toto may have committed the ultimate sense of betrayal but that didn’t change the fact that he was the best father in the world to your son.
So here you were, a year later walking into the Mercedes garage, now the ex wife of Toto Wolff; no longer did the team call you Mrs Boss or Mrs Mercedes out of respect to you, it really wasn’t hard for them to understand what had happened since shortly after Toto fired his assistant the news of your divorce became public.
Sometimes members of the team still couldn’t look at him without wanting to punch him in the face or question what the fuck was wrong with his brain to cause him to lose the kindest woman in the world.
It had been shocking to them when they heard the news of the two of you parting ways, after seeing you interact as a couple over the years, they witnessed nothing but unconditional love and happiness but it just shows that you never really know what’s happening behind closed doors.
You were greeted by a series of smiles and hellos, the team loved you to pieces as you always treated them with the utmost respect and politeness, even offering to help with what you had the skill set for.
You glanced around the garage, easily setting your eyes on Toto’s 6ft 5 frame, immediately walking in his direction, Jack resting on your hip with his head on your shoulder.
It still hurt to see him after all of the time spent apart and getting over him, you were aware that you would always love him but even still the heartbreak would possibly never leave and you knew it was time for you to move on from what you thought was a great love, it was time for you to start over and put yourself first.
Bono noticed you walking over and quickly excused himself from his boss to give you privacy.
Toto turned and saw you walking over to him, still as beautiful as ever, even more so with your handsome little boy by your side, his bag on your shoulder.
"Hey," he greeted, reaching his arms out for Jack who leaned forward into him.
Everytime Toto looked at you he was slapped in the face with guilt, knowing he deserved to feel more than that for the pain he caused you.
"Hi, are you positive you’re able to have him here? I know how busy you can get around here." You asked for the hundredth time in the past couple of days.
"Don’t worry, everyone loves him here and I’m not too busy today so we’ll be fine. What are you doing anyways?" You barely asked him to have Jack during her scheduled hours, you always had him when you were meant to have him, unlike Toto who was always rearranging times.
"I’m going on a date and didn’t want to leave him with just anyone, I was going to cancel if you couldn’t so I’m glad you can, I really appreciate it." You smiled, a tad excited for the date, not noticing the way Toto had stiffened because of your words.
I’m going on a date.
I’m going on a date.
I’m going on a date.
"I should really get going, the last thing I want is to be late. I’ll pick him back up straight after, thanks again." He zoned back as he heard your goodbye but was still riddled with shock to say anything and by the time he had registered everything you had already started walking away so all he could do was simply stare until you were out of sight.
He should’ve expected it really, he hadn’t, but he should have.
It had been a year now and no man would turn down the opportunity to be in the company of a woman so rare.
"Who’s shit in your coffee?" Toto jumped, his grip momentarily tightened on Jack as he turned around, coming face to face with Lewis.
"What?" Toto mumbled, way too distracted to listen to his driver’s question.
Lewis tilted his head at his boss. "What’s wrong with you? Was that Y/N I seen earlier?"
Toto nodded.
"Right…" Lewis eyed him weirdly. "Well I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone pull a face like yours after a conversation with her."
"She’s going on a date," there was a bite to his words that wasn’t heard very often but the idea of you with another man made him sick.
"Wow! Good for her!" Toto glared at him. "What? You aren’t jealous, are you?" Lewis laughed.
"I’m not jealous." Toto muttered like a petulant child.
Lewis shook his head in disbelief. "You have no right to be jealous, Toto. Look, you’re a good man and a great friend but what you did to her was unforgivable. She carried your child for nine months, then had to adjust to be a parent by herself in those first five months because you’re always working and you payed her back by sleeping with your assistant. You lost one hell of a woman, she’s one of a kind, you really cannot be surprised that she’s been asked out on a date, any man would want a woman like her."
Lewis was right, Toto knew he was. You were a one of a kind woman and he had no right to be jealous or annoyed by the fact that you were moving on. Especially when it was his fault that you were now divorced.
It was his fault you were seeing another person, he should be happy that you were no longer consumed by the hurt of his actions but all he could think about was the fact that he had officially lost you now and there was most definitely no way back.
You were no longer his to love because loving him had brought you a pain like no other.
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evanpeterswhoresblog · 3 months
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Cherry Bomb (pt. 3)
Remus Lupin x f!reader, James Potter x f!reader (mentioned), Sirius Black x f!reader (mentioned)
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warnings: smut, p in v, i think it’s protected atp idk, fingering, underage smoking, very dom remus, long af but omg i’m so in love with it
summary: the last part of your plan is far harder to achieve than the first two and it’s far more complicated.
word count: 5k
a/n: ahhh here’s the last part (i think?) anyway sorry it’s long i got carried away but ugh i love remus so much. sorry if my characterization is off, ever since atyd i see him as sarcastic. yeah i love this, hope you guys do too :)
~~~
Out of all the marauders, Remus Lupin was by far the most liked. He was quiet, but not invisible. He was the most sensible out of all the boys and the most polite. Though he did tend to be witty and sarcastic, he was kind at heart. But he was also the hardest one to get close to. Quiet, reserved, beautiful Remus with his nose always stuck in a book. There was always something about him that made girls fall fast. But that was the thing. It was always so easy to fall in love with him. So, if one ever wanted to shag Remus Lupin, they would have to deal with the consequences of loving him. Because he was nothing like his mates. He didn’t shag just anyone. No. He had to choose you. And to be chosen by him was the biggest accomplishment and the biggest curse. Because once you get him, you will never want to let him go.
~~~
Avoiding two of the marauders is nearly impossible. Each corner you turn it seems you run into one of them, or both. And each time their eyes find you they show the same expressions. Confusion. Frustration. Perhaps even a bit of sadness. You debate throwing away the entire plan daily. It’s unfair, the way you’re playing with their minds. But the lingering knowledge that you’re so close to completing the plan entirely keeps you going. Because surely, all your hurt feelings can’t be for nothing.
Right?
You speak to James only once after your shag in the broom closet. It’s a week or two after, he’s been chasing you around, and you’ve been avoiding him. But you decide he deserves some amount of closure. Sweet, lovely, innocent James. You find him alone in the library and take your opportunity. The way he smiles when he sees you approaching makes your heart ache terribly and regret fills your stomach.
“Y/n I’ve been trying to catch you, how are you?” He asks once you’re close enough to hear his quiet tone.
He looks so happy, you feel sick.
“Yeah, I just you know… haven’t been feeling too great,” you lie.
“Oh, I’m sorry. Sit if you’d like, I’ve been attempting to study for the potions test. Aren’t you good with potions? Could you help me possibly?”
You inhale deeply. You could really use a cigarette right now. You’ve broken things off with guys before, but this feels different. In the other cases, you’ve had reasons. For this case though, you have none. James is innocent in all of this. It makes you nauseous.
“Listen, James,” you start, your voice soft. “What happened was great, I enjoyed it a lot, but it was a mistake. I like you, you’re very sweet, but I don’t think we should do anything else.”
Watching his face fall is by far the most horrid sight you’ve ever seen. All the happiness fades fast and leaves behind a bitter frown. He looks down at his papers, toying with his quill.
“I see…” He looks back up, a fake smile on his lips. “That’s alright, it was fun. I’m not really looking for anything serious like that either, so I understand.”
You swallow hard. “I really do like you James, believe me, but it’s just not the right time for this.”
“Don’t worry about it, it’s fine.”
“And...” You pause for a second. “You won’t tell anyone?”
He nods. “Not a soul. This will be our little secret.”
“Thank you.”
“Of course.”
“Well then, I’ll let you get back to your potions. Thanks for... everything.” You give him one last smile before turning on your heels and making your way out of the library.
You almost put an end to it right then and there, but then you see the tallest marauder walking down the hall with Peter. His hands are in his pockets, his book bag slung over one of his shoulders. For a split second his eyes meet yours as the two of you pass each other.
He gives you a small awkward smile.
Fuck.
~~~
To catch Remus Lupin alone you must take the risk of losing your house some points. You wait a week before making your move, for safety. After your conversation with James, the only marauder to pay attention to you is Sirius. He’s still set on telling everyone that the two of you shagged, but thankfully, not many people believe him. Not even his best mates.
It’s a very quiet night when you sneak out after curfew. A night you know one particular prefect is doing rounds on his own. You wander through the castle quietly, making sure to avoid the areas in which teachers lurk. Goosebumps form on your skin, you should’ve worn more than a tee-shirt and sweatpants, but you needed to look casual.
As you’re about to turn a corner, you spot Filch. Panic surfaces inside you and you quickly turn around and run as quietly as you can down the hall. You take a few turns and just as you’re about to relax, you hear a voice.
“It’s past curfew, what are you doing out here?”
Your heart stops for a completely different reason.
It’s him.
You turn to face him and shyly smile. You watch his face change as he recognizes you.
“Oh, it’s you.” He narrows his eyes. “Off to shag my mate again, are you?”
“I never shagged him,” you reply, crossing your arms over your chest. “And I’m out for a completely different reason.”
“What reason is that?”
You shrug. “Personal reason.”
“Ah well, hope it was worth losing your dear Ravenclaws ten points. Get back to your dorm before someone else catches you,” he says, turning away from you.
You watch as he walks down the hall, not giving you another thought. You would’ve replied sarcastically if you could speak for that matter. Once he disappears, all you can do is shamefully make your way back to your house's common room, now understanding why James likes being a chaser.
~~~
Some time passes before you get Remus alone. Each time you see him during the day, he’s accompanied by one of the marauders and you can’t sneak out during his rounds again because your fellow Ravenclaws were not pleased. You’re smoking behind the castle when you happen to finally catch him walking alone. You immediately take your chance.
“Lupin!” You call out to him. You get up from the bench you were sitting on and walk to him.
Thankfully, he stops walking and turns back to face you. “Y/l/n. Is there something I can help you with?”
You can tell from the tone of his voice he’s trying to be polite; it makes your insides warm.
“Yeah, actually there is. I was wondering if you could help me with my transfiguration essay. You’re the smartest lad in the year,” you answer, taking a small puff of your cigarette. You hold it up to offer him a hit, he shakes his head.
“Those things will kill you,” he says. “But I suppose I can help a bit. I assume you’re free right now?”
“Yes, I am.”
“Let me take a look.”
A smirk forms on your lips, and you let out a breath of smoke purposely into his face. “Take a girl to dinner first.”
He swats the air, fanning away the smoke. “Are you going to show me or not? I have things to take care of.”
“Sorry.” You hate the way your face burns. “Come see.”
The two of you make your way to the bench and you take out your essay. Truthfully, you are already finished with it, and you think your work is good. But much to your dismay, only a few seconds after he starts reading it, Remus takes out a muggle pen and begins crossing things off.
“What’s wrong?”
“Your spelling is shit, and you’ve contradicted your argument at least twice already and I’m only on the second paragraph,” he answers, his eyes glued to the paper. “Maybe if you spent more time studying than shagging and smoking, you’d have this information down. We reviewed it a few weeks ago.”
You scoff. “I have not been shagging.”
“Sure,” he mumbles, crossing off another sentence.
“I swear, Sirius is mistaken.” You lie.
He turns his head, his green eyes meeting yours. “Who said I was referring to Sirius?”
Your breath catches in your throat, and you cough due to the smoke. Is he talking about James? Your heart rate increases, and anxiety flows throughout your body. Did James tell? You catch your breath, your eyes meeting his again. He looks unamused.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I haven’t shagged anyone in months, not that it’s your business,” you say.
“You should really practice more on your lying; you are shit at it.” He hands your essay back to you and stands. “I left a few notes of some things you should change, but my biggest suggestion is that you reread the textbook, and perhaps find some more... enticing quotes. Is that all then? Like I said, I’ve got some other business to tend to.”
For a few seconds, all you can do is stare up at him, your mouth hung open ever so slightly. You previously thought Remus Lupin to be a timid boy who went along with the rest of the marauders because he couldn’t say no. Now though, you realize all those assumptions are wrong. He’s quiet, but not timid.
“What do you know?” You question.
“Quite a lot, thanks for the chat.”
Before you can even think of a response, he’s already walking away. You can’t let him slip away again.
“I’ll get it out of you Remus Lupin if it’s the last thing I do!”
He turns his head over his shoulder and chuckles, the sound sending warmth straight to your core. “We’ll see.”
And just like that, he’s gone, and you’re left flustered with rosy cheeks.
You did save the best for last.
~~~
Falling for the third marauder is easier than anything. Almost unconsciously, you begin to fail classes so that he can help you with work, you learn his route around the castle to see him at least once a day, and you sneak around the castle some nights, but he always ends up finding you somehow.
One night, a little over a month after you’ve started your game, something unexpected happens. You’re out after curfew once again, tiptoeing around the castle to see where the tallest prefect is when he appears from behind you. Like usual, he crosses his arms and clears his throat, making you quickly spin on your heels to face him. How does he always sneak up on you?
“How many times am I going to catch you before you start following the rules? I’m sure your fellow Ravenclaws aren’t too pleased with you,” he says. You look up at him, a genuine blush on your face. He narrows his eyes. “You want me to catch you, don’t you?”
“What?”
“You heard me.”
You look away nervously. The plan never involved gaining real feelings for any of the marauders, yet here you were. Standing in your sleepwear after curfew with your heart racing in your chest at the mere sight of one of them. Though you try to deny it, you know deep down you’re crushing hard, and you know it will only end badly.
“I uh... I don’t know what you’re talking about, I’m just on a little stroll back from a smoke that’s all,” you reply after a few seconds, your hands anxiously fiddling with one another.
He rolls his eyes. “Listen, I don’t know what your objective is or has been, but whatever it is it’s not going to happen.”
“Remus I-”
“Sirius, I understand, he would sleep with the giant squid if it had tits. But James, really? He may be more of an... active person than myself but he has far more feelings than you think.” He takes a step forward; he towers over you. You swear you can’t breathe. “You may have fooled them, but you don’t fool me. I can see right through you y/l/n and you’re sick.”
You move backward; he follows each step. “You... you don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Don’t I?”
Your back hits a wall, panic rises in you. Your eyes fall to his hands, and a bit of relief washes over you when you see he’s not holding his wand. But then another thought takes over. Is he going to hit you? When you look back up, he’s only inches away from you, his hazel eyes piercing down into yours. He places one of his hands on the wall next to your head. You can hear your heartbeat in your ears.
“I didn’t mean to cause any trouble, really. I’m sorry,” you mumble, your words genuine.
“So, what was your goal then? To shag all of us and take your pick of who’s best? Peter would’ve been far easier than James you know,” he replies.
“It was just a stupid idea, I don’t know. It didn’t mean anything deeper I swear.” You’re rambling now, the threat of tears evident in the burning of your eyes. You try your hardest to keep any from falling, you can’t cry in front of Remus.
He sighs. “You’re lucky Sirius is oblivious, and James is trusting. If they knew the truth, you’d have the whole school against you.”
“Wait, they don’t know?”
He rolls his eyes again. “Of course not. If they knew you’d be getting hexed almost all day every day.”
“Then how do you know?”
“I notice a lot more than people think. Did you honestly think no one saw you go up to our dorm with Sirius that night at the party? And did you honestly think none of us would notice James’s change in attitude? You think you know more than you actually do,” he explains.
For a few seconds, the two of you only stare at each other. You don’t know what to think. You should’ve known this would happen. Someone was going to catch on. You wish you had never done it. Any of it. Everything would be so much simpler if you’d simply stayed the quiet Ravenclaw girl who never interacted with the marauders. But you can’t go back, no matter how much you wish you could. You can only make it right moving forward.
“I’m sorry, truly Remus.” There’s so much more you want to say, but you can’t. You can’t fathom the words.
“If you’re truly sorry, stop. I won’t be the next pawn in your game,” he says, his voice slightly lower than before. You watch the way his eyes shift, the way he licks his lips, and moves his head down so he’s almost eye level with you. Your breath catches in your throat. “I suppose I pity you though because you and I both know this has become more than a game to you now.”
You turn your head, but he grabs your chin and forces you to look him in the eye.
“You fancy me.”
“I-”
“Don’t try to deny it. Like I said, I can see right through you.”
“It doesn’t matter. It’s over now,” you whisper, a tear nearly escaping one of your eyes.
He inhales deeply and you notice his eyes trail over your body for a moment before meeting your gaze again. “You’re right. It is over now.”
He lets go of you and backs away and for the first time since encountering him tonight, you feel like you can breathe normally. You stay on the wall, silently catching your breath as he walks further down the hall. But just before he’s about to turn a corner, he looks back at you.
“Or perhaps it’s simply my turn to play with you. Oh, and that’s twenty points from Ravenclaw. Goodnight.”
You fall asleep with his words burning in the back of your mind, and an ache between your thighs.
~~~
After that night, everything is different. You try to avoid them all and go back to the way things were before, you really do. You scribble out the page in your journal with their names, you keep your head down in the halls, and you skip the parties they host. It’s Remus who’s begun playing. Somehow, he continues knowing where you are and appears at random times. Whether you’re studying in the library, and he just so happens to need a book from that section, or you’re out by the lake with your friends and he walks by. You know it’s intentional, but it still manages to leave you hot and bothered each time.
“I thought you said the plan was off?” Your friend says one particular day when the two of you are eating lunch.
You look at her, confused. “It is.”
“Then why has Lupin been staring at you this whole meal?”
Instinctively, you look across the Great Hall and immediately catch those all-too-familiar hazel eyes. He doesn’t look away, at least, not for a moment. He stares at you with no shame, and even from the distance you can sense something different from the look in his eyes. Before you can fully figure it out though, he turns his attention back to the other three marauders.
“Did you shag him?” Your friend asks.
“No, I told you what happened,” you answer, focusing your attention back on the food on your plate. “I wish he’d stop.”
Your friend laughs. “Nah, you don’t.”
You hate how she’s right.
~~~
Nearly two months have passed when you finally confront Remus.
You’re sitting in the astronomy tower, a cigarette between your lips, and a scowl on your face. You can’t take it any longer. Wasn’t he the one who told you off? Wasn’t he the one who told you to stop the games? He was. You know it. So, why has he kept it going? He had said that it was his turn, but that was many weeks ago. How long did he plan to keep this going? You let out a cloud of smoke, frustration taking over your body at the thoughts.
“How many points shall I take off tonight? Forty? Fifty?” You feel him sit next to you, but you refuse to look at him. “You haven’t been out after dark in a while though, I’ll give you that.”
“What do you want Lupin?” You ask, annoyed.
He chuckles. “What do any of us want really?”
You look at him with a straight face, hating the way butterflies take over your stomach at the sight of him so close to you. Despite the scars on his face, you find him more beautiful than any boy. More than James, even more than Sirius. There is something so extraordinary about Remus you can’t explain. You wish it would go away.
“Why can’t you leave me alone?” You question after taking another drag from the cigarette.
“I haven’t spoken to you in over a month, I don’t know what-”
“Yes, you know what I mean.” You cut him off. You exhale your last breath of smoke and throw the cigarette off the tower. “I’m trying to leave this all in the past and move on like you said but you’ve made it quite difficult.”
“Seems you don’t like the taste of your medicine love. It’s hard, isn’t it? Trying to avoid someone when they always seem to end up exactly where you are. It gets rather annoying, doesn’t it? Especially when you secretly enjoy it,” he replies.
Your eyes meet again and that familiar trouble to breathe begins. He’s looking at you in a way you don’t know how to feel about. It’s not like Sirius’s drunken stare or James’s needy stare. No. This one, though the same lustful, is far deeper.
“Just tell me what you want Remus,” you eventually say, your voice lower than before. “What do you want?”
“I want you to get out of my head. I want to look at you and feel nothing. I want everything to go back to how it was before you decided to fuck with my friends and me,” he answers.
You swear your heart stops for a few beats. “Then let all of that happen.”
“You think I haven’t tried?”
You stay silent.
“I never wanted this, any of it.”
You look down. “I know.”
“Don’t do that.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Merlin, I give up, you win y/n. You bloody win.”
You’re about to ask what he exactly means, but he acts faster. In the blink of an eye, his lips are on yours. You can’t grasp it at first. You’re kissing Remus Lupin; Remus Lupin is kissing you. The boy who unintentionally caught your heart is kissing you. It’s unbelievable, it’s undeniable, and it’s far from underrated. You don’t hesitate to kiss him back, even through your initial shock.
His hands cup your cheeks, his thumbs stroke your skin ever so gently. You wrap your arms around his neck, one of your hands toying with the hair on the back of his head. He’s a good kisser, very good. That’s why when he parts your lips, you protest.
“Why did you-”
“If we’re going to do this, you have to promise me it’s not a game anymore y/n.”
Your head is fuzzy from how intently he’s looking at you. “I promise Remus, that game has been over for a while.”
“You swear it?”
“I do. Do you?”
“Of course.” There are a few seconds of silence before he sighs, one of his fingers now playing with a piece of your hair. “We have to keep it secret.”
“I know,” you say.
He brushes the piece of hair behind your ear, the intimate gesture sending tingles throughout your body. “I don’t want it to be a quick shag either,” he adds.
“What do you want it to be then?”
The smile he gives you makes your stomach flip. “More.”
~~~
More from Remus Lupin is everything.
After that night, the two of you begin something you don’t exactly know how to name. You would call it a secret relationship, but the thought of that gives you a stomachache. The two of you don’t interact during the day, at least not where anyone else can see. He passes you in the hall as if you’re a stranger, but the second he catches you around a corner in an empty hallway he showers you with affection. And at night when the two of you sneak off, he touches you in ways you never thought possible.
He shows you so many new places in the castle you never knew of. Secret passages, secret rooms, all of it. You never question how he knows all of it, you only hold his hand tighter as he guides you. When he suggests a more secluded place to meet, you of course agree. Though, you never expect that place to be the shrieking shack.
“There’s no way you’re serious,” you say. The two of you are outside, near the Whomping Willow. You make sure to stay out of its reach. “The shrieking shack? That place is haunted, the ghosts don’t even go there because of how scary it is.”
“Obviously I’m not Sirius love, you only shagged him once,” he sarcastically replies, rolling his eyes to emphasize his joke.
“Remus.”
“The shrieking shack is not haunted, believe me, that’s only a silly rumor made so that people won’t go to it. Me, James, Sirius, and Peter go all the time. It has a bed, and given our activities I say we utilize that,” he explains.
You bite your lip. “Are you positive?”
He moves a bit closer to you and places a hand on your shoulder, leaning down so he’s at eye level with you. “You know I would never let anything hurt you, you can trust me.”
“Alright, but how are we supposed to get there so late? It’s in Hogsmeade,” you question.
He chuckles. “Haven’t you learned by now the marauders have many secret ways?”
“Yes, but we’re not in the castle right now how are we to- Remus don’t go any closer you’re going to get hurt you-” You pause, your mouth hung open as you watch the whomping willow go completely still. “How did you...”
“Secrets love, now come, it’s getting late,” he says, holding a hand out to you.
You don’t hesitate to take his hand and follow him into the tree, nothing else is said.
Surprisingly, the walk isn’t too long. It’s dark, gloomy, and a bit cold, but it’s not terrible. At the end of the tunnel, there’s a door. Something in Remus’s posture shifts, almost as if he’s anxious. You squeeze his hand to try to reassure him of whatever he needs, he gives you a smile through the dark that makes your cheeks warm.
The shrieking shack isn’t big, not at all. It’s a simple building with a few rooms and a short staircase. Remus brings the two of you to what you presume is the bedroom though the only indicator is a mattress, blanket, and pillow on the floor. There’s a small fireplace in the room as well, shockingly full of wood and some candles placed near the mattress. The entire shack is creaky and dusty, but you don’t mind. As long as there’s no ghosts, it’s perfect. Remus lets go of your hand and moves to start a fire. You sit down on the mattress and light the candles around.
“What do you guys use this place for?” You ask.
“It’s just a place we come to sometimes when we don’t want to be around other people,” he answers. His back is still turned to you, you could stare at it all day. “Sirius was the first one to discover it wasn’t haunted.”
“Oh? How did he find that out?”
“He’s always been the bravest out of us, though I think he just wanted another rule to break.”
You chuckle. “That sounds like him.”
He finally stands and turns to face you, a bright fire burning behind him. “You would know, you shagged him.”
“Oh, shut up,” you say as you slide off your shoes.
He begins to walk to you. “Can I ask you a question?”
“This context doesn’t seem good, but yes you can,” you reply.
“Be completely honest, out of the three of us, who’s the best?”
He’s standing right in front of you now. You look up at him, a coy smile on your lips, and begin to untie his shoelaces. “You are of course.”
“For some reason, I think your answer is biased,” he says with a laugh.
You trail your hands up his legs after he steps out of his sneakers, stopping once you reach his belt buckle. It quickly gets undone. “What would make you say that?”
He laughs again. “Just a hunch I guess.”
Your moment of control is taken fast when he pushes you down on the mattress, his lips attacking yours. It isn’t a lie though; he is the best. Unlike with Sirius and James, you share such deeper feelings for Remus. Each time he touches you, you practically melt into the palm of his hand. He’s caring. He’s gentle, but rough when need be. Though the two of you argue sometimes, it always is resolved with a hug, a kiss, or a shag. So, in the simplest of words, Remus Lupin is the perfect boy in every way.
All your clothes are discarded quickly, his too. He kisses you deeply as he uses his fingers on you. Sometimes you wonder where he’s learned all his skills from, but even thinking about him with another girl has started to make your stomach hurt. Instead, you focus on how good two of his fingers feel inside you. They’re so long, so slender. More than once in class you’ve been completely distracted by the sight of his hands, specifically his fingers, even more specifically when he’s wearing rings on them. They feel just as you imagine, extraordinary.
When you cum, you’re moaning a mess into his mouth, your body shaking. He milks every last bit of your orgasm out of you before stopping. You watch through heavy lids as he sucks his fingers clean of your cum, the sight makes you audibly groan.
“I need you,” you whisper, running one of your hands through his hair.
“Do you?” There’s something in the tone of his voice mixed with the way he’s looking at you that makes your heart ache in your chest.
You nod. “In so many ways Rem.”
“Promise?”
“Always.”
He moves inside you slowly at first, but he finds a decent pace after a few minutes. Because of his height, you weren’t at all surprised at the size of his cock. It’s by far the biggest you’ve ever encountered and the best. Though sometimes it leaves you sore, it always leaves you in a daze of dopamine.
Remus struggles to keep his head at your level as he fucks you. He presses soft kisses to your forehead, one of his hands intertwined with yours. You’ve never felt such intimacy in your life, it almost makes tears form in your eyes.
“Tell me you’re mine,” he says, his voice shaky. “Even if it’s not true.”
“I’m yours, Rem, completely,” you reply. His hips meet yours harder, and you moan. “All yours I’m all yours.”
Neither of you lasts much longer than that.
In the aftermath as the two of you hold each other, he rests his head on your chest. You run your fingers through his hair softly, the sound of his breathing like music to your ears. It’s at this moment you realize just how deeply you care for him. You hate what you did with that silly plan, but you don’t think you’d change it. If ending up in this moment only came from the plan, you’d do it over a million times.
“Is this real?” Remus asks after some time.
You sigh and press a kiss to the top of his head. “Yes. This is real.”
And so, it is.
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gurugirl · 3 months
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Can We Start Over | Ch. 3 The Mistake
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Series Summary: From the first day you and Harry meet, your relationship is beyond complicated. A one night stand leads to hurt feelings and then a job opportunity that you simply can't pass up is offered. But can you handle working for a man like him? rich!harry x plus size!reader | enemies to lovers
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A/N: This is a 5 part series commissioned by @justfattiethings (thank you hon!).
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Chapter 3. Summary: Things are a little hot and cold with Harry but then when you learn the truth about what happened that first night it feels like everything changes. But maybe it's a mistake to allow yourself to feel anything more for him.
Word Count: 9.5k
Warning: 18+ only, smut, alcohol consumption, feelings of confusion and turmoil, angst
Can We Start Over? masterlist
Harry had thought a lot about the way he treated you that night. He knew that what he’d done was shitty. Shittier than what you did to him. You were only retaliating. And he had to admit, your method of revenge was quite genius. It was cold and clever. And it gave you the upper hand in some ways.
It made him like you even more. And having heard it from your own mouth that you’d still been thinking about him after that night (even if you only told him as part of a drunken declaration) had him feeling things he shouldn’t. He wondered what had possessed him to insist on having you as his personal assistant. So far, things had been very professional between you but you’d only just gotten started and Harry, knowing himself, was quite aware that he could easily find himself falling for you, as crazy as that sounded. And he hadn’t had sex with anyone since you.
Not that he couldn’t go without for a bit… it’s just that having you in his home, sleeping down the hallway from him, seeing you every day in his office in your perfectly professional outfits and pretty face, and grabbable hips… his thoughts could tend to become inappropriate.
But as much as he enjoyed how cute you were he was tired the day after he had to pick you up from the club. You’d interrupted his nightly routine with your drunken antics and his mood was rather foul. It was also not wise to have been thinking about you the way he was so the following morning when you were still raging with a terrible hangover he was very curt with you.
“I want to have sympathy for you, Y/n, but I don’t. You put yourself into that situation last night and these are the consequences.”
He stood at his desk as he spoke and you had barely dragged yourself into his study. You weren’t going to bring up how your head was pounding or how queasy you were so you were surprised when he did. Perhaps he could see it on your face. You could hardly remember the night before. Except that Harry had helped you get home.
“I know. It was a bad idea. I went overboard. I’m sorry. But…” you sat down and opened up your laptop, “thank you for helping me and bringing me here last night –“
“I hope that will be the last time. I don’t like to deal with drunks and if it happens again on a night you have to be at work the next morning we will end our contract. I won’t tolerate it again.”
Yeah, he was in a bad mood. And you were his punching bag for the next few days. You could tolerate his bad attitude for the money for only a while longer before you’d quit. It was surprising to you how he’d gone from rather pleasant to suddenly cold and uncaring.
You wished you could recall what had happened, what you’d said to him while you were drunk but you knew better than to blame yourself. Harry was just an asshole with a few, rare nice moments you determined. You’d keep your distance and not allow yourself to feel as if he was a kind man again.
.           .           .
“Mr. Styles, the car is here. Your suitcase is already ready.” You poked your head into his office.
It was time to head to Vancouver.
You enjoyed traveling. When you worked for Alfred you had the occasional opportunity to do so. However, normally, he didn’t go with you. He’d send you alone. Mr. Spector preferred staying at his home unless the destination was Italy, where you’d stay with him and some staff at his lovely Italian villa.
Another thing you enjoyed about flying with or for someone wealthy was that you would normally get the larger business class or first-class seats. You did, however, hate flying coach now that you’d become accustomed to early boarding, free snacks, large seats, and generally better service all around.
But now you were working for Harry, who was still treating you coldly. And you’d booked the seats next to each other but you wished you’d booked them apart. It would have been nice to have a bit of a break from his attitude. Well, it was more just that he was hardly speaking to you unless it had something to do with work.
“Comfortable?” Harry asked as he buckled himself in. You hadn’t expected him to say anything to you at all. Much less ask about your comfort.
“Uh, yeah. This is great actually.”
It was great. In fact, the whole experience of flying that day had not been bad at all. Harry didn’t talk to you much but he wasn’t acting like your presence was a burden like the days prior.
When you got to your hotel you checked in and were each given key cards for your rooms. Harry needed your room to be attached to his so he could call you and you’d be right there if he needed.
You showered and enjoyed the view from your balcony before dressing and getting ready for the first meeting you’d have with Mr. Radatz, the owner of the gallery who kept the art piece for the owner. You were excited to watch Harry in action. To see how he worked and better understand what being an art dealer’s assistant entailed.
You knocked at Harry’s door to see if he was ready. It was nearly time to leave. He answered wearing a Lavender suit. 
“Did you know I was wearing this?” He looked at your lavender blouse and up to your face.
You laughed as you shook your head, “I did not. Just a coincidence I guess.”
.           .           .
When the driver parked in front of the gallery you realized that it was closed to the public. This would be the first meeting with the gallery owner, Mr. Radatz, and his wife. Harry wanted to see the piece before moving forward with making an offer to purchase. If it looked legit he’d agree to meet with the woman who owned it to negotiate.
You followed him inside and Mr. Radatz greeted you both, “Welcome. I have the work in the back for you to look at. Follow me.”
The lights were off throughout the large space except for the area at the back where the painting was hung with spotlights shining over the small piece.
Mr. Radatz showed Harry the folder the owner had provided so he could verify the provenance of the artwork, including a signed certificate of authenticity from the original artist, an appraisal, as well as a document containing information about the artwork itself.
“And where is the receipt with the most recent purchase?” Harry slid the paperwork back into the folder.
“Oh, the owner has that with her. Hallie didn’t want to part with that. She can show you tomorrow.”
You knew this should have been some kind of red flag from what you’d learned. Though all the rest of the provenance seemed good, the bill of sale should have been provided as well. You supposed you’d see that tomorrow.
“Perfect. This all looks very good. I’d like to negotiate with the owner tomorrow. I have a client who wants this. Will you let her know we’ll set up dinner to discuss?”
Mr. and Mrs. Radatz made arrangements with the owner before inviting you and Harry to dinner at their favorite spot.
And of course, once at the restaurant wine was ordered which you hoped you could avoid. The less alcohol around Harry the better you figured.
“Oh, Y/n, you must have a glass. I insist! You simply can’t come here and not have some wine. I promise you won’t regret having some,” Mr. Radatz said as he poured a glass for you.
Well. You tried.
And it turned out that the wine was quite amazing. Better than you thought it’d be and after Mr. Radatz kept refilling everyone’s glasses you realized how close Harry was sat. He seemed much more relaxed once he’d eaten his meal and had a few glasses himself. But he was still mostly ignoring you.
Mostly. Because a few times you noticed Harry’s eyes on you. And when you excused yourself to go to the bathroom he stood with you and helped you out of your chair. Which you certainly did not need.
You knew you’d had too much to drink. Maybe one glass too much. You weren’t trashed. But you were definitely a bit tipsy and feeling very warm. And Harry was looking very good. You could admit to yourself that you were horny. Despite how he’d been a bit cold with you since the night he had to pick you up after you were so drunk you could hardly stand.
Harry was sitting next to you while the gallery owner sat across. Harry had done quite well to mostly ignore you. He’d spoken to you when he needed something but otherwise, his attention wasn’t on you. Which for some reason, had you feeling absolutely insane. The way his suit fit him, the style of his hair was just right, the bit of unkempt scruff on his face, the way he handled himself with the gallery owner… he was sexy and confident and you couldn’t stop watching him. You blamed the alcohol.
“I think it’s time for us to head home. You and Hallie can work out the final details tomorrow for purchase. It was nice to finally meet you,” Mr. Radatz stood and shook Harry’s hand and then yours.
You and Harry stayed back a bit. Another drink and you finally had the nerve to say what you wanted, “You know…” you swallowed, “I get why you’re being so standoffish with me but it would be nice to put this behind us. Makes everything much easier if you can just let go a bit. I’d like us to be amicable, Harry.”
He snorted and looked around the bar before turning back to you, “Amicable? Why?”
“It just makes things easier, like I said. I know you didn’t like me being drunk and having to pick me up from-“
“Y/n, you and I will continue to have a professional relationship. You’re the perfect personal assistant and I really would like to keep this going. I’m trying my hardest to be reasonable here. You don’t make it easy.”
You blinked and looked down at your nearly empty glass, “Reasonable? What am I not making easy for you, Harry? The first week I worked for you wasn’t so bad. But after you had to pick me up that night you’ve been hard to deal with and honestly, it kind of sucks. You’re not rude, but you’re not nice either.”
You watched as he clenched his jaw and nodded before finally setting his gaze on yours, “What do you want me to do? Hmm? I know I’m not always nice but it’s a fine line for me. If I’m too nice I find myself wanting to do things I know you don’t want. But if I’m keeping my distance it’s easier to remain professional.”
You scrunched your face in confusion, “What would I not want you to do?”
Harry laughed and you watched as his eyes dropped to your mouth and he tutted, smacking his tongue, “Kiss you. Have a repeat of that first night.” He looked away and toward the edge of the room, “Things like that.”
You laughed and shook your head. You hadn’t expected him to say that, “Wow. Okay.”
“Exactly. Not the best way to conduct a professional relationship.”
“Well, you’re forgetting that when I decline your advances you don’t get to have a repeat of that night. So there’s nothing to worry about.”
“Oh I’m well aware,” Harry turned back to look at you, “You’d never want me in your bed again. I get it. It’s well deserved. I fucked up when I treated you like shit that first night we met. I regret how I went about things.”
You nodded and hummed, “Tell me what happened with that. You never really explained to me about what happened. I’m curious who called you and why you suddenly went from hot to cold.”
He sighed and took a gulp of his whiskey, “It was a friend. Someone who started to get attached and it was my fault for stringing her along. I was a coward to not break up with her sooner. It was never meant to be serious. I didn’t even know at first that she was serious about me,” Harry licked his lips and twisted the glass around on the dark wood tabletop. “But when I realized she’d stopped seeing other people and got her feelings hurt when I took someone else out for dinner I should have confronted her.”
You nodded, “So you kicked me out of your room because you invited her and forgot?”
He shook his head, “She was meant to be my date for the ball. But we had different flights and hers got cancelled and I didn’t know she was coming. Didn’t know she’d rebooked. The last thing I knew was that she couldn’t come. But then when I got her call she was already just outside of the hotel on her way up,” he looked at you, “I made a choice between hurting her feelings and yours but that blew up in my face, obviously. I thought I’d never see you again and so…” he sighed, “I’m sorry. It was a shit move. I’m shit. I know. I just… I had no time to think it through and Aster and I have mutual friends and sometimes we cross paths for work so… I was spineless.”
“Aster? That’s a pretty name. Have you spoken to her since?”
He shook his head, “No. I’m sure I’ll see her again at some point. Should be an interesting reunion.”
“So she found the condom and note,” you smiled with a laugh as you finished off the last of your drink.
Harry nodded with a chuckle, “Of course she did,” he shook his head exasperatedly, “If I could go back in time, I’d have been nicer to you. Had you stay. I’d have gone down to the lobby with Aster and explained what was going on to her. Tell her the truth. I would have told you the truth too. Of course, you probably would have left just the same once you knew about Aster. But at least I wouldn’t have been such an ass to you both.”
You pursed your lips as you looked toward the window in thought. So he hadn’t technically been cheating on someone but you would have probably bolted the moment you learned there was another woman there for him. Wouldn’t have wanted anything to do with that. But it was true, had he just told you the truth things would have been different.
Still, his knee-jerk reaction to treat you like shit wasn’t something you could just let go. You understood it better now, sure, but it still had your skin crawling and your tummy twisting when you thought about the way it made you feel.
But you were happy to know what had happened. And with all the alcohol in your system, you were looking at him in a different light.
It didn’t help that Harry kept whispering to you, pressing his shoulder to yours, trying to make you laugh. You figured he probably had a little too much as well. He was much looser. Laid back. Flirty. Kind of felt like the man you met that first night.
And of course, with all those thoughts mixed with alcohol, you almost didn’t care about the way you met him and left that night. Almost. Except that now you were thinking about it and that’s all you needed to remember who you were with.
“We should head back to the hotel, Harry,” you said, regretfully.  You were having a good time with him. Your tipsy brain was enjoying the attention from him.
Harry silently looked you over. His eyes roved over your features as he nodded, “Sure.”
The ride to the hotel was quiet. You tried to make sure there was a safe distance between you and Harry. Because he was awfully close at the bar and one or two comments were a bit suggestive. But either way, you couldn’t go back down that rabbit hole.
As you were swiping your room card Harry stood behind you. You pushed your door open and turned back to him, “Everything okay?”
He placed his palm on the wall next to your door frame and nodded, “Just making sure you get in safely. Want to be a gentleman.”
You coughed out a laugh in surprise, “A gentleman?”
He grinned softly, “Yes. Why? Did you not want me to be a gentleman?”
“Harry…” you warned. He was definitely stepping past a boundary. Even his own boundary. Maybe he’d had more to drink than you realized.
“Sorry,” he put his hands up in yield, “I’ll go to my room. You know where to find me if you need anything.”
You certainly did know where to find him. And it was even harder not to feel tempted when your rooms were adjoined by a door staring at you as you lay in your king-sized bed alone and imagined he was with you. That your fingers were his. That he was making you come.
You pressed your face into your pillow as you gasped with your fingers rubbing your clit.
There was a moment where you tried to imagine anyone else. Anyone but him. But it was difficult when Harry was so attractive and his comments to you were so suggestive. So you gave in to your fantasy. No one would ever know anyway.
.           .           .
Hallie, the woman who owned the painting, was at the restaurant before you and Harry arrived. She shook Harry’s hand and then walked him inside to the hostess who seated the three of you.
At first, you didn’t think too much about the way Hallie treated you. She focused on Harry from the moment you met her. And he was the buyer and ultimately the one she needed to impress. But the longer you three spent together you realized she was actively ignoring you.
It really ramped when she pulled out her chair to sit right next to Harry and leaned in to whisper something to him that you couldn’t hear. He didn’t seem to notice it. At first. But you kept it professional and ignored it the best you could.
When the waiter came to take your order she looked at Harry, “What wine do you like? I was thinking of a Bordeaux.”
Harry hummed and looked at you, “That sounds fine to me. What about you Y/n? Bordeaux?”
Hallie made a strange sound and spoke over you before you could say that anything was fine, “Well, it’s all about you, Harry. What you want. Not her,” she laughed as if what she was saying should be obvious.
Harry looked at Hallie and squinted his eyes in puzzlement, “I’m not sure what you mean, Hallie. She’s sitting here at this table with us, so she’ll be sharing the wine too.”
Hallie let out an exasperated sound, “Pfff…” she looked at you, maybe for the first time directly since you’d met her, “You’re probably not going to want to drink such expensive wine anyway being just an assistant. Right?”
You didn’t want to argue. Didn’t want to cause a scene, “Oh… no it’s fine. I don’t need to–“
“She’s going to share the bottle with us. Of course, she will. I know she enjoys wine,” he turned to look at you, “Don’t you, Y/n?”
You looked between the two. You had been treated this way in the past. Some people assumed you were just a lowly assistant. No one to bother with too much.
“I mean… I like nice wine but it’s not a big deal,” you shrugged.
“See?” Hallie gestured toward you while looking at Harry.
Harry shook his head and leaned toward you, “You’ll have some of the wine.”
Dinner was slightly awkward after that display. You kept quiet and ordered a cheaper option off the menu. Hallie clearly didn’t think you deserved to eat an expensive dish. You only had one glass of wine, despite Harry trying to get you to have more.
Harry and Hallie discussed the most recent bill of sale. Which, Hallie had not brought.
“Well, I’ll need to see that so I can give you a fair offer. Without it, there’s not going to be a deal.”
“I’ll make sure to get it to you. After this, we can get it. It’s in my office.”
“I was really hoping to have this deal finished by the end of dinner so I could meet with the Radatz’s and have the painting packed for moving it from the gallery.”
Hallie put her hand over Harry’s, “Don’t worry. We’ll have everything ready for you by the end of the night. The Radatz’s know to wait for my call.”
“Is anyone feeling like dessert?” The waiter asked after your dinner plates were cleared. 
“Harry, you need to try their flourless chocolate cake. It’s to die for.”
“That sounds good,” he said as he looked down at the dessert menu and then looked at you, “What about you? What would you like, Y/n?”
You appreciated that he kept including you, despite Hallie practically brushing you off the entire day. You smiled, “I was thinking the cheesecake. With the raspberry compote.”
You chose the cheesecake because it was one of the cheaper desserts. You didn’t want to hear Hallie balking about you wanting the $25 frozen hot chocolate sundae with Belgian chocolate truffles and strawberry glace.
“Oh, Y/n…” Hallie tsk’d, “Are you sure you want that? Cheesecake? I mean,” she looked at the menu and pointed out the fruit salad with mint, “The fruit is probably going to be better, don’t you think?”
You had seen that option but it had pineapple in it, “I’m allergic to pineapple. I don’t have to get a dessert if it’s too much money or something.”
Hallie scoffed, “Allergic to pineapple?” Her laugh felt like an insult. Like maybe she didn’t believe you.
“Get whatever you want, Y/n. Don’t worry,” he looked at you but you could see he was getting frustrated with Hallie.
You could hardly enjoy your cheesecake. It felt like you were doing something wrong. You weren’t sure if Hallie was trying to get you to go with the fruit option because it was cheaper or because it was healthier and she was making a jab at your weight. Probably both really. And that had you feeling a little nauseated. Like she was scrutinizing you and despite having ignored you for the most part was suddenly very interested in your dessert choice.
When the bill was paid and the three of you exited the restaurant Hallie’s driver pulled up and Harry’s just behind.
“Look,” Hallie grinned at Harry and put her slender fingers on his forearm, “My office is at my home, and this transaction might be better done with just the two of us.” She looked at you, “You can have his driver take you back to the hotel, right, Y/n?”
You began to nod but Harry moved to stand next to you and put his hand at your low back, “That’s not going to be necessary, Hallie. I have to say, I don’t appreciate how you’ve treated her and that you think you can suggest that she leave by herself. In fact, this transaction is not going to happen at all. You’ve really left a sour taste in my mouth.”
Hallie’s red lips dropped open and she looked shocked, “What?! Why not? I just paid for your dinner and hers and you’re telling me this isn’t happening?”
Harry pulled his wallet from the inside of his suit jacket, “How much do I owe you for the inconvenience?”
She put her hand up, “It’s not that. It’s just that you should have told me before we got to dinner that you weren’t interested.”
“I was interested before I met you in person,” Harry looked down at you, “Go get in the car. I’ll be right there.”
You walked away and waved at the driver as he ran to the back passenger door and opened it for you.
Once inside the car, you watched Harry and Hallie. You wished you could hear what they were saying to one another. You could see Harry’s body language indicated he was relaxed and uncaring. But Hallie was stiff and her face wore a scowl as she looked toward the window you sat near (though she couldn’t see in through the dark tint) and then back to Harry.
However that conversation ended, Hallie was not happy with the outcome as she stormed off toward the car waiting for her.
Harry slid into the backseat next to you, “Are you okay?”
“Oh yeah. I’m fine. It’s not the first time I’ve been treated that way by other executives. A lot of people look at me like I’m just an errand girl or something–“
“Well, I won’t tolerate it. I didn’t recognize what she was doing until she said something about your dessert.”
“I’m sorry about that. You lost the deal and it feels like my fault.”
Harry took your hand, “No. I didn’t lose the deal. I called it off. I don’t want to work with someone like her. Can’t trust someone like that.”
You weren’t sure how to feel about the way Harry was acting around you. The night before had been confusing but you kept a level head and assumed he was acting the way he was because of the wine. You couldn’t deny you liked it when he flirted with you even though you knew you shouldn’t. And now that he took up for you and canceled a deal that could have been worth the cost of a small bungalow in Los Angeles had you even more confused.
“I still feel bad. If I hadn’t been there–“ Harry sat back in his seat, letting go of your hand, “None of that. I’m not going into these meetings without you so whoever I deal with will have to treat you as a colleague just as they would me.”
You looked out your window and smiled to yourself. You were starting to feel like you and Harry would work very well together. It had turned out much better than you thought it would. He seemed to be more easygoing after the previous night when you finally talked, and at that moment you were feeling fond after he didn’t go along with the way Hallie had treated you.
“Let’s grab a drink at the bar. Heard good things about their martinis here,” Harry said as you both walked into the hotel together.
“Okay. Yeah. Sounds good.” You could go for a martini. And it would be nice to chat a little more with Harry. Spend a little more time with him before you both parted ways for the night. And you resolved that it would only be a drink and nothing more. You and Harry and alcohol didn’t mix well. Or perhaps all that mixed a little too well and that was the issue.
The bar was full of people. You and Harry found the only little spot in a corner opposite the bar area. A high-top table with two tall stools that you found a little difficult to climb into. Harry steadied you as you planted yourself onto the cushion and he stood behind you. “What kind of martini would you like?”
You liked how close he was standing. Liked that you could smell his cologne again. You turned to look at him, “I don’t know. I’ve only had like a dirty martini and a Cosmopolitan. Didn’t like either much.”
“We’ll both have a French martini. How’s that sound?” His hand wandered to your upper arm; fingers softly pressed into your skin. His face was so close to yours that you swore he was about to kiss you. That he was–
You stopped breathing for a second when he leaned in and kissed your cheek. You thought he was going for your mouth. When he pulled away he turned around to find the bar and order your drinks.
You were very well aware at that moment of Harry’s intentions. And you weren’t sure what to think. On the one hand, this was the man who had taken up for you in front of a client and lost out on a lot of money because he didn’t like the way she treated you. He was also flirty, attractive, and you knew how good he was in bed and it really seemed like that’s what he was going for. And being a bit horny lately wasn’t helping matters either so you were wondering if it couldn’t hurt to let your hormones make that decision for you.
But. On the other, much bigger, hand the way he’d treated you that first night you’d met him, the way he kicked you out of his room… You couldn’t forget that he’d done that. Though, you had finally learned about what had happened and it made you feel less angry at him overall.
You laughed at yourself at how silly you were being. Clearly, the answer was going to be no. He did something pretty fucking shitty and that really should be the end of it. Right? Yes. So that would be it. You’d definitely turn him down should he try to take things any further.
Your pretty pink martini was sat down in front of you and then Harry’s next to yours as he dragged his stool right next to you and sat down, his body teasingly close.
Oh, he was dangerous.
He lifted his glass toward you, “Cheers to us.”
Your brows snapped together, “To us?”
“Yeah. I think we make a good team. We dodged a bullet working with someone like Hallie today and I’d much rather be here with you and this cocktail than spending a ridiculous amount of money on a painting.” He smiled with those mischievously seductive dimples.
“But that painting would have made you a ridiculous amount of money too. Your client was ready to pay well above whatever Hallie probably paid for it.”
Harry shook his head, “There’s no way I’d work with her. Even if that painting would have made me hundreds of thousands of dollars. Don’t like how she acted like you didn’t matter.”
You smiled at him as you clinked glass to his.
“Oh, this is actually good!” You were surprised you liked the taste.
Harry smirked, “It is good, isn’t it?”
You nodded.
“I’m glad you like it, Y/n. I hope you know that when I say I think we make a good team, I mean it. You’ve already made my life so much easier. I feel lucky that I get to work with you.”
You had one arm on the table, your fingers daintily gripping the glass stem, and your other hand was in your lap when you felt his fingers gently pushed in between yours as he took another sip.
You needed to shut it down. He was coming on strong and it was making your head spin too fast. Another sip of your absolutely delectable drink and you figured you could tough it out through one full drink and then before he could order another you’d make up some excuse to go back to your room. Alone.
“I’m trying really hard to be good here, Y/n,” Harry spoke, his body turned toward you, “But I like you a lot. More than I should given that you’re my employee.”
You cleared your throat and blinked as you looked down at your drink, “So, tomorrow morning you’ll get a wake-up call from the concierge and I’ll come get you at 10:30 before we need to meet the driver to take us to the airport.” You began rattling off the following day’s schedule. His hand wrapped around yours had you feeling so discombobulated that you weren’t sure what to say in response to his sudden confession. You just had to get through the drink. Then you’d call it a night.
“Why don’t I just have you as my wake-up call tomorrow morning?”
You sat your drink down and let out a laugh of disbelief, “What?!”
“Just a suggestion. We’re two adults. No one has to get hurt.” Harry leaned in closer and you arched away from him slightly
“Harry, you’re my boss and this is not a good idea.”
“At this moment I’m not your boss. I can take on two different roles if that makes you feel better.”
You shook your head. You tried not imagining his grunts that night. Right before he started to come, the little moan, and then when he filled up his condom he was breathy and raspy, and the jerk of his hips... It was so sexy.
“Not only that, but the way also you treated me when you kicked me out that night? That, I’m sure you would agree, is a good reason for this to not go any further. I can’t just forget that.”
Harry nodded, the smile faded from his mouth as he took a drink of his martini. “That’s fair. I fucked myself over by doing that to you. Then fate, or whatever, brought us back together and now I have to live with it. I know I said sorry already and that probably doesn’t mean as much to you as I wish it did, but I really am sorry, Y/n.”
“I can forgive you but how could I ever forget it? That was humiliating, Harry. I’ve never been treated like that before.”
He shook his head and looked down at the tabletop, “I’m sorry. I know. I was a proper dick to you,” he lifted his gaze to yours. “I can’t ever forget that I did that either.”
You squinted your eyes and folded your lips into your mouth in thought as you remembered that night. But it felt like such a long time ago in some ways.
He squeezed your hand and his handsome blushed lips wound upwards slowly.
Another sip and a reprieve from his eyes and his cologne did nothing to stop your mind from wandering. Maybe it was the scent that was bringing back all those memories from that night.
When he first revealed his sturdy chest and all its tattoos you were floored. You just remember wondering to yourself what Harry possibly saw in you. You didn’t figure you were his type at all. But the way he lavished you with attention... The way his mouth wandered over your body and how he looked at you… the way his hands smoothed over your skin and how eager he was to go down on you.
You shook those thoughts from your mind as he finally let your hand go. Maybe he could tell you were in turmoil.
“What?” Harry pressed his shoulder into yours.
“Nothing.” You didn’t look at him as you answered. He was too close and you weren’t sure you wouldn’t let your eyes drift to his pretty lips.
“I know I was flirting and I shouldn’t have been. That’s not fair to you. I promise to be good from now on.”
You smiled as you looked at him. And just as you knew would happen, your pupils dropped to his lips before you brought your sight back up to his eyes, “Thank you, Harry.”
You had only a few more sips of your martini before Harry spoke again, “Do you want to know what I told Hallie when I had you sit in the car?” “Of course, I do,” your eyes widened as you turned toward him.
“I told her she was trashy for treating you the way she did. That she ruined a deal that was ready to go and lost out on a lot of money which was stupid of her. I told her I was disgusted by her and that I knew what she was trying to do and that would never be happening.”
You laughed, “I do appreciate that you took up for me that way, Harry. I still can’t believe you did it, though. Could have been a big payout.”
He smiled at you softly, “It was an easy decision, Y/n. I love making money but I need to have anyone I work with to be respectful of me and you.”
And perhaps it was the martini that was making you look at him differently or maybe his words, it was an easy decision. For him to choose you over thousands and thousands of dollars?
Even though you really didn’t want to, you and Harry both made your way back to your rooms once your martinis were done. You kind of wanted to keep talking to him. Wanted to bask in his attention a bit longer. Despite you knowing that was a bad idea. You hated that you liked it.
Not unlike the night before, Harry stood by your door as you unlocked it, “I guess this is goodnight.”
You turned to look at him and shrugged, “Probably should be.”
He nodded, “Right. Um,” he scratched the back of his neck, “If you need anything, just knock. I won’t be going to bed for a bit.”
“Thanks, Harry.” You smiled at him as he waved and stepped away from you, leaving you to finally enter your room and close your door.
And for some reason, it felt so disappointing. Like it was a mistake to let him just walk away. A perfectly healthy and handsome man who clearly wanted to have a little fun with you. You could do no strings. It could be just something between two adults, like he said. Right?
You shook your head as you removed your clothes and turned on the shower to let the water warm. You couldn’t get him off your mind. It was impossible.
Standing under the running water you sighed and hated that you felt the way you did. Your own mind and body were betraying you. And it was nuts to be thinking of Harry the way you were but he was so goddamn attractive and he’d been so nice to you. Choosing you over all that money.
When you stood in front of the mirror and dried yourself off you felt pretty. The way Harry looked at you and flirted… you had to quit thinking about it. Had to quit picking apart all the details and his words and the way he looked at you.
But you were just a human like he was. And you had needs that you could both fulfill for one another. Harry could make you feel good and you knew you could make him feel good too.
“Stop it, Y/n.” You chided yourself as you slid the fuzzy hotel robe on before putting lotion onto your face.
But you couldn’t stop it. You kept thinking about his body and the night you met him. He was cocky but he was sexy. And he knew how to work you properly. He’d really gotten under your skin that night.
You plopped down onto your bed and clicked your TV on but your brain continued spiraling and that made you feel hot and despite your shower, you were already annoyingly slick between your legs. You couldn’t understand why you were so horny lately. Ovulation perhaps? Or maybe it was just Harry in general. He was too fucking attractive. In all honesty, it wasn’t fair.
You closed your eyes and before you knew it you were already using your fingers to rub yourself. But it wasn’t cutting it. The man just next door was more than willing. And you could say for certain that he was going to make you feel so good. So good. Better than your fingers would.
You moaned and rolled over to face the door that adjoined your rooms. You wondered what he was doing. If he was still awake like he said he would be.
Somehow it felt like the door was calling to you. Just to press your ear to it. Just to see if you could hear anything.
But there was hardly any noise you could make out. It could have been anything. TV. He could have been showering. Or maybe… you began to imagine him lying in his bed stroking his cock and thinking of you. Imagining that he was fucking you with that big thing…
“Stop…” you shook your head as you whispered to yourself. But just as you started to move away from the door you did hear something. A voice. Harry’s voice. He was on the phone perhaps. You strained to hear him but there was no other sound.
For some very strange reason, you decided to put your hand on the doorknob and twist. Just to see. If it was unlocked you’d just leave it. Or maybe you’d lock it. You hadn’t checked since checking in. It hadn’t dawned on you.
To your total shock, it was unlocked. The knob twisted easily and you felt the latch disengage from the spot that held the door shut but you stopped yourself. Letting go of the knob you backed away before you could open the door. It was unexpected that the door was unlocked but now your heart was pounding. All this time the door had been unlocked.
You heard a knock, “Y/n?”
You pressed your hand to the door, “Yes? Did you need something?”
“No. I thought I heard you at the door. Were you trying to open the door?”
You blinked your eyes and reached for the handle, opening the door only to realize that the door on his side was still closed, “No. I only just realized the door was unlocked.”
“Oh really?” You could hear his voice a lot better when suddenly his own door opened up. He was, to your surprise, only wearing pajama pants. His bare chest was still wet from a shower he’d clearly just taken. His hair was wet on his head.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to disturb you,” your voice came out weak as you and Harry stood in your rooms holding the adjoining doors.
“S’okay. Not disturbing me. I just got out of the shower and heard the doorknob.”
You nodded as your tummy flipped. You didn’t know what to say. And you didn’t know what to do either. Except to freeze and keep your eyes on him. It was almost like you were in someone else’s body when you reached for him and pulled him to your body, his mouth crashing into yours and hasty hands feeling his arms and his back and his shoulders as he wrapped his own around your body and stepped into your room fully.
You were naked beneath your robe, which had opened at the bottom as you stuffed your fingers into his wet hair. And you felt him against your hip. He was hard. Already. Just like you were wet. Already.
It was clear you’d both been pent up and thinking about the other and now there was no turning back.
Harry gasped as he parted from the kiss and looked down at you, “Do you want this? Y/n I don’t want to do anything you’re not comfortable–“
You drew his mouth back down to yours. Less thinking. More doing. The more you thought about it the less likely you were to go through with it. Your body had a great need and Harry could fulfill it.
He moaned as you pulled at him and made it to your bed. “I want you, Harry. God I need,” you pulled him with you into your bed and laid on your side with your lips attached to his.
You felt his hand roam up your hip and over your soft terry robe that had opened wider letting your breasts fall out. When he palmed over your tits you reached down to cup his large cock.
“Was just thinking about this exact thing, Y/n,” he whispered against your mouth, “S’why I’m so hard. Couldn’t stop thinking about you and your body.”
You moaned and pulled his hand down between your legs so he could feel your slick, “Me too, Harry. I want you.”
Your lips moved together wetly as you were pushed to your back. He took your breasts in his palms and kneaded before ducking down to lick and kiss softly. It felt so good. It was making you dizzy to have his hands on you again.
When he untied your robe the rest of the way he grasped your thighs and looked up at you, “Am I allowed? Can I eat you out, honey?”
You nodded with your brows stitched together and felt him lifting your legs, parting your thighs, and then running his fingers through your sodden crease.
But the moment his lips found your clit your body was elevated and soaring. His strong shoulders dug into the back of your thighs and you felt him suck and lap at you. Like he needed it so badly. Like he couldn’t wait to get a taste of you. The first time you had sex he took it slow but now things were feeling shaky and rushed and desperate.
His lips and his tongue and then his fingers added in had you moaning loudly and you’d barely even gotten started.
“God, it feels so good, Harry…” you placed your fingers into his hair and basked in the sensation of having a gorgeous man licking your pussy. It was a rare thing for you.
“That’s what I want,” he spoke against your clit and then lifted up to look at you, “Want to make you feel so good. Want to make you smile, Y/n. Want to make you happy.”
Your mind was spinning. He was too much all at once but you couldn’t stop it. Your body was in need.
His tongue ran up and down your folds and you could feel the warm breath puffing out of his nose as he worked your pussy over. The gushy sound of your hole taking his fingers and your gasps didn’t feel like reality. You must have been dreaming. Must have been imagining it all.
When he smacked his lips over your clit you groaned and pulled at his hair. He nuzzled down into you further, his fingers pumping into you smoothly.
He peeked up at you, kissing your mound, “You’re so fucking sexy, Y/n. I could spend all night down here,” he flattened his tongue through your crease and then licked over your clit teasingly.
“Oh my god…” you were feeling out of your mind. You pushed yourself up to your elbows so you could see him and you realized you wanted his cock. Right away.
Pushing at his forehead he lifted his lips from your cunt, “What’s wrong?” His chest heaved.
“I want you to fuck me. I want your cock.”
Harry moaned and sat up to peel his pajama pants down. His gorgeous dick coming into view with that one thick vein down the center.
He stroked himself and shifted between your parted legs, “Need to feel me, honey?”
You nodded quickly as you watched him line himself up with your pussy right where you wanted him. That yummy stretch and the feel of him moving into you had you crying out pathetically.
Harry hovered over you as he pushed himself in and then pressed his lips to yours, licking against your tongue as he drove his cock into the hilt.
You gasped into his mouth but he continued moving his lips against yours, stuffing himself in until he couldn’t push in any further.
The strength of him on top of you and the way his thighs flexed as he pushed in was dizzying.
And as he continued kissing you he pulled back and then plunged back in sharply. Over and over again deep presses of his hips against yours, rocking into you and slipping out to the tip, wet skin colliding in a perfect rhythm.
Your TV was still on in the background and the doors that joined your rooms were both wide open as Harry worked himself into you. The press of his balls to your ass as he ground himself in had you gasping.
“Oh fuck!” You whimpered.
“Yeah? S’deep in there isn’t it? M’cock fits inside of you perfectly, Y/n. Fucking opening up for me, sucking me in, squeezing around me…” He moaned.
He hardly knew what he was saying. He only knew how good you felt. How your walls split apart as he moved in, the way he could work you open bit by bit, and how filthy wet you were.
“Ohh… so deep like this. Jesus Harry,” you opened your eyes and watched his face as he fucked into you. It was ecstasy. It was relief. You could see it on his face how good he felt. How good your pussy was making his cock feel.
There was a delicious sting every time he buried himself into your guts. The achy stretch. Your walls warm and slick, accommodating his length and his girth just how he needed.
And you had the pleasure of hearing those sexy grunts again. The way he sounded as he fucked you and enjoyed your body. Grunting in time with every thrust, every smack of his hips into yours, wet skin pressing together, blankets under your back shifting with your body as you were railed into the bed.
“Sounds like it feels good, Y/n. Yeah?”
You whined, “It’s so good. Feels so good. Holy… holy shit!”
Harry knew it felt good by the way your body was shaking, your sexy moans, and how he could hear your wet pussy taking his hard cock.
He swiveled his hips in a circle, rutting into you as he lowered his mouth to yours again, needing to feel your soft mouth against his, your warm tongue on his tongue.
Thrust after thrust had your heart pounding, your cunt clenching, and when he angled himself over you with his pelvis against your clit your entire body began to vibrate.
You felt him moan into your mouth. He was drooling just the tiniest bit, you felt saliva dripping over your lips and down your cheek.
Sex with Harry the second time was frantic and heated. So different than the first time, but just as good. It felt even better somehow.
But Harry was going to come too fast. His go-to was usually to wank first and then get into it again so he could last longer but this time he’d been interrupted when he thought he heard the doorknob so he was already halfway there by the time you pulled him into your room.
He sat back, stilling his hips before moving his hands over your soft breasts, and looked at your pretty face, “Love how you take me, Y/n. Kept dreaming about you since that night.”
You moaned and rocked your hips up when Harry brought his hands down your sides and nudged himself in shallowly with a hiss. He watched his cock slide through your opening and repeated again before pulling out completely, “Sorry. I’m about to come,” he panted as he took your ankles and lifted your legs up, pushing your calves against his shoulders.
“It’s okay,” you chuckled as you watched his strong arms lift your legs. His long fingers held your calves, “I haven’t stopped thinking about that night either, Harry. It was so good.”
He grinned and you watched him drag his eyes over your body, “Rub your clit for me okay? Need you to come,” he smoothed his hands up and down your legs as you reached down to find your clit, pressing over it gently as you watched his face.
When you felt his tip pressing through your tight muscle again you both moaned together.
Slowly his thrusts got harder and deeper as he got into the motion of fucking you once again. His cock was so hard you swore it could rip you in half if he went any harder.
Your body jolted from the force of him, tits swaying up and down as his hips smacked into you harshly.
“Fuck…” he gritted as he watched your pretty face twist up and your lips part. He loved that he was making you feel so good. Loved how you were moaning and panting.
The bed began to lightly creak under the force of Harry’s thrusts. His back and his thighs were flexing with each plunge.
And you were rendered speechless as your pussy took him long and deep. His smooth punches into your cunt, his tip smashing into your insides had air being forced from your lungs and it was the only sound you could make as you panted and gasped.
You could see that he was sweating. He was trying so hard to hold off for you but it was sexy as hell. He wanted your release first and you certainly wouldn’t complain about that.
Slick and hot and sticky, Harry pushed into you over and over again until he felt you gripping him tight and your parted lips dropped open further and you began to cry, “So fucking hot, Y/n. You coming on my cock baby? Yeah?”
You had no idea what you answered him but you knew you nodded as your body melted and your pussy throbbed around him. Having a big cock sliding back and forth through your walls as you spasmed in your orgasm was incredible. Harry’s own grunts and the grip he had on your calves were just making it that much better.
He let you finish completely before he dared stop fucking you or allowed himself to come. He wanted to watch you fall apart on his cock like you had that first night. It was the best thing he’d ever seen.
When you moans slowed down and Harry felt his balls tighten he released your legs and pulled out, stroking himself over your pussy as he unloaded right there on your low tummy and over your cunt, his white come dripping down your pussylips.
You watched his face scrunch up as he threw his head back and moaned loudly into your room. His big palm slipped up and down his long shaft coated in your arousal, working himself to his end, spurt by spurt.
He nearly collapsed over you as he pressed a palm down into the comforter and lowered to kiss you again, “So good. So fucking good, Y/n.”
You moaned into his mouth and agreed. It was good. So fucking good.
Somehow you both wound up falling asleep in your bed. You normally would clean up but you were spent and so was he.
.           .           .
Your eyes peeled open and you blinked slowly as you realized that what had felt like a wild dream had been real. Harry was right there next to you in your hotel bed.
You smiled at first. Thinking of how hot it had been. How much you needed a release. How much he enjoyed himself. You slid out of his arms and sat up, noticing that your TV was still on. Everything had been so frantic. But you needed it. Right? You needed to have him again.
But did you really? You looked down over your body and felt a wave of disappointment. You remembered how you felt it could have been a mistake to let him walk away. But that wasn’t right. Letting him go back to his room hadn’t been a mistake. You should have left it at that. You pulled your robe over your body and frowned.
This was the mistake. Giving in to your desires was the mistake. It should have never happened.
You began to panic. You couldn’t kick him out of your room. Well, there was that flash of the thought that you should kick him out of your room like he had to you that first night.
But you weren’t Harry. You were a nice person who felt things deeply. It was almost 6 am. Perhaps you’d take a walk and clear your mind. Get a coffee…
And all you knew was that you needed to get out of there. You couldn’t stay in that room with him looking so innocent with his face smushed into the pillow. Nope. Because he wasn’t innocent. He was far from it and you’d fallen for his antics.
Letting it happen again had been a mistake.
NEXT PART
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sophiethewitch1 · 8 months
Text
A Dramatic Irony
A/n: Trying to combat writer's block so I decided to do this little drabble. Spoilers for the WHB prologue, and also includes my theory that MC will turn out to be God in some form or capacity. Because why the hell else would the angels turn over to our side?
GAME IS 18+ THIS DRABBLE ISN'T, BUT EVEN THE PROLOGUE HAS ADULT CONTENT! MINORS PLEASE BE SENSIBLE!!!
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“So, it was you? This whole time?” His lips graze against your throat. He’s warm, of course he is. All that holy light spilling out? He’s so warm it’s almost uncomfortable.
Everything about this is uncomfortable, really. But of course, like always, you’re at the centre of it. Of every situation, from the depths of hell to the cloudy tops of heaven.
“I’m not Him,” you grit out, your body shivering. You don’t dare move. Not with Gabriel, the man who had sworn to kill you, who had chased you over hell with armies of feathered fiends, with his teeth at your jugular.
It doesn’t matter the way he shakes just the same as you. It doesn’t matter that his fingers skim delicately - reverently - across your stomach. It doesn’t matter that those eyes that before looked at you with absolutely nothing inside, now seemed to overflow. With love, obsession.
You know, before all this, you’d been an atheist. Before an unholy angel had crawled out of your computer and a righteous demon had saved you and your best friend’s life, you had thought God couldn’t exist. That the world couldn’t be so cruel if someone like Him truly did exist. That your childhood wouldn’t be mired in tragedy, that you wouldn’t struggle to get out of bed every day. That you wouldn’t have to blink away flashes of the scent of copper and soap.
And of course, then you’d made a deal with the devil. You’d gone to hell. You’d broken countless contracts, and warred against heaven. You’d had to fight for every second of your life, and you’d done it bitterly, angrily.
Angry at this God that had disappeared, and angry at His stupid mistake of making every angel madly in love with him. Angry at how He never thought of the consequences of his actions, of how He never imagined a world He wouldn’t exist in. How just by your birth, you’d been destined to suffer. How your parents would have died no matter what, how you would always have had to walk this thorny path.
How He never seemed to consider what could happen when you created one of the strongest beings in the universe and forgot to give them a fucking moral compass.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he murmurs, ignoring your words. His too-warm body crowding in too close to yours, as your fists curl against his chest, desperately trying to push him away. It’s no use because no matter what’s in your blood, you aren’t strong enough - what is Solomon’s, and what is His.
Because, apparently, those stupid mistakes you’d cursed God for, were yours.
“I’m not Him,” you repeat, hands moving to claw at his throat. He doesn’t react beyond a small sigh of pleasure, curling into your touch like a cat in the sun. “I’m not Him. I don’t have His memories. I’m not Him.”
“I told you, didn’t I? I didn’t have any negative feelings towards you. I’m sorry, I’ll fix it. I’ll make it up to you, I promise. Please, just let me stay by your side?”
It’s such a strange dichotomy. The angel who sees this as a beautiful, miraculous reunion. And you, who sees this a tragedy. One you could never escape. The angel from before, swinging his scythe at your throat, and the one who now presses plush lips against that same skin. It’s too ironic, isn’t it? It just can’t be true. It just doesn’t make any sense.
“I don’t want you by my side,” you sob, but he just shushes you, pressing kisses against your head and across your face. He licks up your tears, groaning at the taste.
It’s too cruel. You have to wonder if the old you, the one you can’t remember, ran from this.
His hands tighten around your waist. It doesn’t really matter what happened before, because you know you won’t be able to run this time.
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luvsellie · 1 year
Text
PEOPLE WATCHING [j. maybank]
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pairing jj maybank x fem!reader
summary jj ignoring one of his friends is strange. and off-putting. so when he does it to you, argument ensues and indifferent confessions toward one another begin to spill.
warnings rafe being an ass, mentions of abuse, semi based on s1 ep5 but also not?? don’t expect anything regarding the obx plot, reader is in a similar situation to sarah and kie’s social standing (kook-turned-pogue) !
wc 3.1k
note this song just SCREAMS jj i couldn’t not write something inspired by it! also this man is so ‘angsty-love-confession-in-the-rain’ coded why didn’t the obx writers take that chance when they had it >:(
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you never thought you would see the day that jj deliberately ignored you. sure, he hated talking about his feelings, and he was too stubborn for his own good, but he had never once gone out of his way to avoid your presence. until now.
“he won’t even look at me,” you hissed at kie, eyes glued to the blond who maneuvered around groups of people, the tray in his hands lacking drinks. he had a smile on his face regardless, making small quips at people as he passed them.
kie huffed, moving her body to block off your view of jj. her lilac dress shimmered in the orange light as she said, “just give him some time. he’ll come around. he always does.”
you chewed on the inside of your cheek, spinning the ring on your index finger as you continued to try and get a clear view of him. “yeah. i guess you’re right.” 
the girl in front of you grinned in a way that seemed to say i always am.
still mildly offset about jj’s attitude toward whatever it is that you had done to upset him, you took a step back from kie, situating yourself so you could comfortably watch him once again. as you did, you noticed his back was now to you, topper, kelce, and rafe appearing to slowly herd him toward the building. the trio of men wore smug smiles, and before you knew it jj had lost his tray and swung open one of the glass doors, sprinting in the direction of the restrooms.
your eyebrows knitted together in sudden urgency, hand already swatting at kiara’s bare shoulder. “kie. kie they’re chasing him-”
“who’s- oh. oh,” kie said aridly.
“we have to go,” you told her, already gathering the skirt of your sage-green dress in a hand.
kie grabbed your arm quickly. “and do what? stab them with the back of our heels?”
“if that’s what it takes,” you told her stubbornly, ripping your bicep from her grip. “stay here if you want, i don’t care, but i’m going to go help the best i can.”
you didn’t wait for her response as you started in the direction of the door, gait switching between an uneven combination of a speedwalk and a run. whether or not jj was mad at you, nothing was going to stop you from assisting him in any way possible, especially if he was severely outnumbered. rafe was practically psychotic, his solution to everything was always violence, and topper and kelce only egged him on.
the cool a/c brought goosebumps to your skin, a chill shivering its way down your spine as you swept past people and furniture. fortunately, you spotted the dark-colored bathroom door, the sound of disgruntled male voices seeping through the wood. when you recognized jj’s, you didn’t hesitate to push past the barrier, deciding the consequences could be left for future you to deal with.
middle-age men immediately protested to your appearance, but you ignored them as you hurried in the direction of the overlapped voices, and, sure enough, you found yourself walking into the midst of the kooks jumping jj.
none of the boys noticed your presence, too wrapped up in whatever they were doing to grow aware of their surroundings. 
your attention zoned in on your beat-up-looking friend, the sight of kelce retaining him in a jarring choke hold resulting in your sudden outburst of, “what the fuck is going on?”
“oh, look who’s decided to join us,” rafe leered, his grin growing twice as big. jj continued to struggle against kelce’s grasp, saying your name dryly as his eyes jumped from you to the oldest cameron sibling.
“the hell is wrong with all of you?” your glare turned to kelce, his eyes narrowed in vain. “let him go or i swear to god…”
rafe’s face only continued to dwell with enlightenment at your interruption. he stood up straight and took a long stride in your direction, forcing you to spin toward him. he put less than a foot between his body and yours. “or you’ll do what-”
the air stilled as you slapped the man across the cheek, your palm stinging from the impact. even though he towered over your smaller person, you still sneered up at him, gaze narrowed as if he were no more than the scum on the bottom of your shoe. “you’re not the only one in this town who has a powerful father, rafe cameron. yours just happens to have the worst reputation.”
rafe’s fingers ghosted the flushed skin where you had struck him, eyebrows beginning to knit together as his familiar rage started to surface. he barely had time to speak, “you fucking bitch-” before someone cut in.
the flickering lights caught everyone’s regard, and you watched stiffly as kelce instantly released jj and spun on his heels. “gentlemen. ma’am,” a security guard addressed, “is there a problem here?”
jj was quick to jump in, rushing to say, “pardon me, officer, i just…” his blue eyes caught yours, but they jumped back the man in the black tux before you could give him a warning glance. “we just- well, actually, yes, there is an issue. we have a criminal trespass in progress here.”
you knew he was just doing the best he could to get you both out of the situation, yet you didn’t mask your rather disgusted expression as he continued.
“beep! call it in, right?” the blond urged. “blatant disrespect for private property.”
the boys around you nodded, avoiding eye contact with the guard. multiple yeahs circled the room.
“we’re in violation of all kinds of shit, sir,” jj said, barely taking the motion to glance at you over his shoulder. he turned to kelce, plastering on a fake smile. he began to straighten the cyan-colored bow tie. “but these young gentlemen…” his hand was quickly swatted away. “...uh, caught us, sir, and they were about to take us away. which is what you should do; escort us out of here.”
you watched as jj offered up his wrists before looking back at you. his brows jumped to his hairline in a silent plea to just go along with the nonsense spewing out of his mouth. still mildly irritated at him and everything about whatever the fuck is going to happen as a repercussion, you exhaled sharply and took a few steps in his direction, sending a glare in rafe’s direction.
your arm brushed against jj’s as you mimicked his actions. “you caught us, officer.”
the man rolled his eyes, but reached behind you, hands roughly grabbing onto yours and jj’s biceps. “come on.”
but jj seemed to feel that he needed to add to the situation, his adhd never failing to shine in moments like these. he turned to kelce again as rafe moved closer, topper behind him. “fix that tie, son. oh, and you’re lookin’ quite spiffy too. you powerpuff girls have fun, alright?”
just as the guard was about to lead you both through the exit, rafe shouted your name. “you know you’re pretty hot for a ‘pogue!’”
jj spun before you could even react, already storming in the direction of the smirking boy. ‘mister security’ left you standing in the doorway as he trudged over to the beginnings of a fight and ripped your friend from the group. “let’s go,” he snuffed, shoving the blond harshly.
you avoided jj’s aggravated gaze as you locked eyes with rafe, still being pushed by the man. raising a hand, you flipped him off. “suck my dick, cameron.”
“knock it off,” the guard said, his fingers squeezing the flesh of your arm. his warning compelled you to turn away, huffing air through your nose in annoyance.
rafe scoffed a laugh from his spot, highly entertained by the sight before him. “hey, safe travels back to the cut, you two!”
“this shit ain’t over!” jj hollered, earning a harsh shove in the direction of the exit.
as the man directed you and jj out of the building, you made a point to not bother interacting with the boy, ignoring his existence entirely, just as he had done to you previously. talking to him at the moment would only result in yelling at each other, and the idea of that was rather repulsive.
finally pushing past one of the glass doors, you attempted to wrench your arm away. it only ended with the guard’s hands squeezing even tighter. “dude, i can walk by myself- let me go.”
jj tried the same thing as you passed a distressed-looking kiara. “yeah, we have legs. can’t you see that, daryl? and, hey, thanks for the ‘discretion.’ let us just walk out by ourselves, yeah?”
nearly stumbling on stairs because of your heels, you made a noise out of exasperation, eagerly pulling back. “give me- oh my god, just let us go!” as heads started to turn in your direction, you desperately hoped that one of your parents would show up, but as daryl continued to haul you and jj (who continuously made comments to the people he passed) away from everything, you made one last hopeless attempt to get him to let go.
“wait!” you said, this time actually tripping on your heels. faking a stumble, you very nearly successfully fell out of daryl’s grasp. “these shoes are killing my feet. let me at least take them off if you insist on dragging us through the mud.”
he rolled his eyes, but loosened his grip.
bending slightly, you raised your left foot off the ground, undoing the buckle of your heel. as you stepped out of the shoe, you went to do the other, stealing a glimpse at jj. this is too easy.
finally standing on the bare ground, you turned back to daryl, shoving your heels to his chest. “would you mind holding these for me? thanks.” using the best of your strength, you threw him off, jj happily doing the same, and began backing in the opposite direction just as your father appeared from behind mr. carrera. his face went from confusion to anger in the span of less than three seconds, and you knew you’d be in for the biggest lecture of your life when you confronted your parents later. but for now, all you wanted to do was get off the property.
and jj seemed to have a similar idea, as his fingers brushed against your left hand, gesturing with the jut of his chin when you made eye contact with him. “come on.”
unable to help the satisfied smile that pulled at the corners of your mouth, you turned away, quickly following jj into the darkness as kie called after you.
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“okay, i think we’re far enough,” you huffed heavily, slowing to a walk beside jj.
he ran his fingers through his disheveled hair as he nodded. for once he had nothing to say, and it made you stop on the sidewalk.
“so that’s it?” you started, grabbing his elbow and forcing him to look at you. “you’re just going to go back to ignoring me? after everything that just happened back there? at least tell me what i did for you to treat me like this.”
his blue eyes averted your own as he chewed on his busted bottom lip.
“what did i do, jj?” you asked as your arm fell back to your side, annoyance slipping into despair. “just tell me.”
jj looked at you, and even in the strained moonlight could you just now see how badly his upper left cheek was bruising. he was fiddling with the hem of his white button-up shirt as he stood, stubbornly remaining quiet.
sighing, you took a step closer, the pavement cool under your bare feet. he flinched back when you went to raise a hand. you licked your lips. “did…did rafe and the others do this?”
stiffening, jj lifted his chin and looked down at you, his expression morphed into something between disgust and vacancy. “no,” was all he said.
“oh,” you breathed, your body running cold, even in the humid night air. of course. “maybe you should come back home with me. i can-”
“no,” jj repeated more firmly, shaking off your words. “no, i don’t need your pity right now. go back to midsummers. you and kie looked like you were having loads of fun.”
you scoffed in sudden disbelief, realizing what this was about—why he had been ignoring you for nearly a full day. “i’m not- i’m not offering to care for you out of pity,” you told him bitterly. “you’re my friend, jj, and i’ll always try and protect you when i can. i’m sorry that you’re too naive to realize and accept that.”
jj took a step back, his hands balling into fists as he shook his head. “i don’t need your protection. i don’t need your compassion, or whatever the hell you wanna call it,” he spat. “and i don’t need you.”
“you’re just saying that,” you protested quickly, swallowing down the crack in your voice and blinking back the sharp sting of tears.
shaking his head again, jj’s lips pressed into a thin line. “go back to that big, shiny house of yours.” he wasted no time in turning around, his back straight as he walked away, the clarity of his figure growing less and less as he retreated.
unable to process the moment, you ran a hand over your face, forcing yourself to keep your composure and not yell out to him. what the fuck just happened? you thought, panic beginning to set in as jj officially disappeared around the block.
what am i going to do?
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the house was quiet when you entered, and after a quick call for your parents, you realized they were still partying away at the country club. it was somewhat of a relief.
feet sore and dirty, you began to rid yourself of your jewelry, unclasping the chains around your neck and picking off the rings on your fingers. you set them on your nightstand as you shut your bedroom door, immediately falling onto your bed.
lying back to stare at the beige ceiling, you inhaled deeply, running through the events that had taken place. and it had all ended in jj leaving you. for how long, you didn’t know—didn’t even want to think about it. so, with one last sigh, you stood from your mattress, stripped yourself down, and headed toward the bathroom, already thinking up a plan for tomorrow.
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“look, i wasn’t trying to make a scene,” you explained over the phone, shrugging your shoulders even though your parents couldn’t see. “it just…happened, i guess. i’m sorry.” there was a tense pause, filled by the sound of your dad sighing on the other end of the line. “can i please go now? we can talk as soon as i get home later, i swear.”
you heard unintelligible whispers before your mom said, “you cannot keep blowing us off.”
“i know, i know.” you really did not want to have this conversation when you were nearly at jj’s house, the sky murky with dark clouds. “again, i’m sorry, but you know i don’t normally do stuff like this, so can you guys please ease off?” 
“fine. only for a few hours. i want you home soon, it’s supposed to storm today. we will talk later.” your dad said roughly, irritation laced in his voice.
shoulders visibly sagging, you couldn’t help but nod in relief. “yes, thank you. love you both.” with that, you impatiently clicked the red button on the screen as jj’s house appeared. pocketing your phone, you spotted the blond in his yard, squatting next to his red dirt bike. and for a split second, you were just happy to see him, the events circling last night forgotten.
you approached quietly, making just enough noise to let him know someone was walking over. as his head turned, your jaw went slack at the fresh bruise blooming along his jawline. you cleared your throat. “hi.”
“hey.” jj returned to his bike.
“i, uh…i came to talk.” thunder rumbled from somewhere above. “about last night. about us.”
the entire way here you rehearsed what you were going to say, switching things out or removing them completely, but now, when he stood and looked over at you with a somewhat pissed-off expression, you found your tongue to be dry and your mind blank.
“what’s there to talk about.” he said it more like a statement and less like a question. “there’s nothing to talk about.” 
you licked your lips as droplets started to wet your shoulders and scalp. “we both know that’s not true, jj.”
he wiped his hands on a cloth before tossing it into an open toolbox. shaking his head and sauntering forward, he said again, “there isn’t anything to talk about. you say you care about me, but you don’t. you don’t. do yourself a favor and stop lying to yourself. stop lying to me.”
“no, i do care, okay?” the raindrops began to fall harder, yet the only thing you were worried about was getting your point across. getting jj to understand. “i have cared about you for as long as i have known you. that first night at the chateau with the others…when you finally let me in…i didn’t know then, but i know now—i love you. a lot.”
jj scoffed and shook his head with an incredulous smile, his stare glued to the soaked grass, ignoring the weight of your confession. “you don’t know anything, alright? that night didn’t mean anything to anyone.”
“yes, it did!” you persisted loudly, frustrated with both him and yourself.
“no, it didn’t!” he snapped, reaching forward and grabbing the sides of your shoulders in exasperation. when you flinched at his yelling, a sudden wave of realization washed over him, and he released you with a step back, blinking rapidly against the rain. “nothing happened; nothing is happening.” he sounded more like he was trying to convince himself rather than you. “you’re a kook. and i’m a pogue. we belong on two very different sides of this island.”
“jj,” you said softly. he remained still, hair stuck to the sides of his face as you went to cup it, palms resting against his wet skin. “just give in. for one pathetic second just forget about the social economic standing of everything and give in to me. please.” you weren’t sure whether the wetness on your face was your tears or the rain. “i know you want to, but you aren’t letting yourself. nothing you say or do will push me away. you’re stuck with me, pogue or not.”
his gaze flickered vicariously between your eyes and mouth, internally fighting with his own feelings. but, ultimately, you could see that your words had struck deep enough—that as the chill of cold water drenched your clothes and hair, as his warm fingers wrapped delicately around your wrists, thumbs sliding against your skin, you had won.
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© luvsellie 2023 | do not repost, republish, steal, or translate !!
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ladyelissarose · 9 months
Text
‘Reckless’
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Summary; Miguel finds out why you’ve been too careless and reckless on missions..
Warnings: an argument between the two- its not to heavy.. mostly hurt/comfort
“Ow-“
You had just flinched your arm away from Miguel when he had grabbed it. You cradled it close to you as he then scolded you firmly, keeping an eye on you as you refused to meet his,
“You lied. It’s not a scratch!! You broke your arm and he almost had your head!!”
You rolled your eyes at his loud words and even scoffed, even though you winced when you tried to put your arm down, trying to show it was ok- which you totally failed at doing. Nonetheless you sighed, annoyance evident in your tone,
“Ok maybe I did! But it’s not that bad-“
With one hand on his waist and the other pointing at you, he snapped,
“You disobeyed orders! You’re making close calls and I don’t like it! Yes we can get hurt on the job, but not like this when you’re making poor choices.”
Feet planted on the ground you tried to keep a steady position and look strong, taking his yelling about safety and all, but in reality you were in pain and felt lightheaded, and slowly you were growing frustrated because of it as Miguel ranted on.
“Come on niña!! (Girl) what’s the matter with you-“
Finally you’ve had enough of his mountain of a man speaking down to you as you were of course shorter… but in his eyes all he saw was you being very careless.
The pain was getting to you, making your emotions swirl out of place, hence why you screamed,
“AND WHAT’S YOUR POINT!?”
Miguel flinched a bit at your unusual behavior with him, but he couldn’t help but let his ego bark back at you with some honesty to wake your head up.
“That you could’ve been killed!! That’s the point! Do you know what kind of problems that would’ve caused? Pain or anything? Cómo puedes ser tan imprudente y no preocuparte por las consecuencias, niña terca?!” (How could you be so reckless and not care about the consequences you stubborn girl!?)
Tears of anger and pain grew in your once sun-shining eyes as you shouted back, trying to reason out your deal,
“Because I have nothing to lose ok!?? Maybe that’s why I don’t care as much!!”
Miguel was about to yell back, but your words caught him off guard. Like if someone sucker punched him.
He didn’t look so bulky or so scary anymore, when he lowered himself onto one knee to get on your level, as he reasoned with curiosity, one hand resting on your good shoulder,
“And what’s that supposed to mean?”
His brown eyes showed his genuine concern for you, unlike anyone you’ve known. You wanted to keep tough and play as the fearless Spider-Woman you were, but it was made impossible when Miguel got a hold of your cheek, beckoning you silently to speak up.
So at last, you broke and confessed, like a little girl and no longer like Spider-Woman.
Letting the façades you wore tumble down through your tears, into his large hands that would catch and hold them all.
“Nothing.… that I have no one back at home.. no family to mourn me. Bury me. Cover my graves with flowers. Like if I had to put everything aside and boil it down for me- I’m… alone.”
His lips parted a bit, as his eyes searched yours, trying to find the right words to say.
It had been a while since he’s used good encouraging words while being kind, but suddenly it was like a switch that flipped in him, and almost immediately he found the words, and he patted your cheek gently as he cooed, his anger and disappointment long gone.
“You’re not alone. You have me.. and I’ll never leave you out like that. But even then I won’t ever do such.”
“Like what?”
He shrugged a bit and shyed out with his eyes everywhere but on you, mostly cause of the fear it caused him to think of you six feet under, and he knew it’d be seen on him.
“The burying thingy and all.”
‘Oh so he wouldn’t bury me then? Or what?…’
“Oh.. why?”
Disappointment was heard in your voice, and Miguel was quick to address with his eyes on you this time, wanting to show he meant it with every bone and vain in his body,
“Because Dulce, I wouldn’t ever let you die on me. You’re not allowed to die under my watch, te lo prometo.” (I promise you that.)
Shyness took over you as the realization of your craziness, thinking it was ok to give up everything of you, when you had so much to lose.. so you apologized immediately.
“I’m so sorry- I didn’t know what I was thinking-“
“Shh shh sh.”
He shushed you right away, letting you know that it was ok as he added,
“It’s ok now.. you’re safe, alive, and here… No más lágrimas mi amada.” (No more tears my beloved.)
With gentle hands he cradled your face and let his thumbs wipe your tears away, refusing to let them fall.
He now wanted to see you cheered up, so he offered with the best smile he could muster.. if not the only one he showed- but just to you.
“You want ice cream after we leave the med? It’ll help with the fever you got.”
Twinkles were shining in your eyes as you replied with a nod,
“please?”
He chuckled at the sight of joy beaming on you, and he then stood up to his full height and took your good hand in his, leading you out as he responded sweetly, squeezing your hand comfortingly,
“of course Dulce-“
Then with a smirk most likely painted on his face, he added,
“-ven mi shadow.” (Come my)
Miguel knew deep down he had thought the same thoughts once, but with you around and so much more? He’d rather deal with the the weight of the good and bad everyday, then leave empty.
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bomertheshark · 6 months
Text
Whimpering
A Brahms Heelshire x top male reader
Short
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Today was a pretty good day. You had gotten up early, showered and even eaten. Now you lay on the couch reading a new book you had gotten in the mail, since your new boyfriend hated you trying to go outside the manor.
Who was this boyfriend of yours you may ask? Well it’s none other than the man behind the wall, who, you had been taking care of via a doll until recently. What changed this you weren’t really sure for awhile before it became clear that he had a specific interest in you which led to the moment you were in now.
“Please!” He whimpered. He had been riding your thigh while you were reading the book that was mentioned earlier, you’d been invested in it for a while. You had just gotten to a really good part when your partner had placed himself on your lap trying to get your attention.
Everything was too much but not enough for him, from the friction of your jeans on his corduroy pants to how you weren’t even paying attention to him. He wanted more, and more than that, he wanted your attention. He was hoping that he could get you riled up by grinding on your lap but you eventually just moved him to your thigh so that you could pay attention to your book. He hated that more than anything. He leaned forward to whimper in your ear hoping that it might be enough for you to finally pay attention to him and fuck him, you only sighed at him and shifted your leg.
He moved forward more so that he could hold you now fully whimpering and moaning as you started to bounce your leg out of habit, again it was too much and yet not enough. He was obviously getting quite irritated with you. He couldn’t understand what he was doing wrong! He was whining and showing how submissive he was! Why weren’t you just fucking him!?
He started to whimper harder from his frustration from the lack of reaction he was getting. At this point you couldn’t even pay attention to your book because of how whiny he was being, and the fact of how hot he looked.
At this point in time Brahms was leaning back on your leg, holding himself up with his hands on your knee causing his shirt to ride up and showcase his v-line and happy trail. You could see how labored his breaths were as he whined and whimpered. You could also see the ragging hard on he was sporting in his pants as he kept on chasing that high on your thigh.
You finally decided enough was enough and you would help your poor puppy out. The moment you put your book down on the table Brahms was all over you holding you tight “p-please it hurts.. I want you in me so bad.. please fuck me..” he held you even tighter thinking you might let him go when you got up from the couch. “It’s alright sweetheart we’re just going upstairs.” Brahms didn’t seem to wait that long since the moment you said that he pushed you back on the couch, straddling you “No! I want you in me now! Please! We can do it here! I don’t mind!” He said frantically all the while he was desperately grinding himself into you.
You decided that you could deal with the consequences later by taking Advil and a really good shower. You started to take off your clothes and before you could even raise a finger to help Brahms take his off he was already naked back on your lap looking up at you, grinding and whimpering for you to put it in. “I can’t put it in without prep Brahms you and I both know that.” And obviously he knew something you didn’t know as he blushed when you went to start prepping him with you spit to find that it was already occupied by something cold and smooth.
Brahms whined as he dug his face into your shoulder. “Brahms.. did you already prep yourself hoping that I would do this?” Of course he nodded, he was always one to break the rules. After the plug was gone and you tested to see how loose he was you started to lower him onto your length, going slow so that he could adjust to it.
Starting at a slow pace was already a lot for Brahms since he was already so overstimulated, but for him it was perfect and he could want nothing less than to be fucked raw by you. Once he started to shift his hips back to meet yours you knew that you could pick up the pace starting to get a much harsher pace with deeper thrust leaving Brahms to see stars.
It was beautiful to take in, his moans and whimpers from you hitting every perfect spot in him, to the way he clenched around your cock letting you feel the plush walls that surrounded you, only making you thrust deeper to reach the utmost pleasure and euphoria. “O-oh god.. you feel so good inside me, please fuck me harder” he said and you complied fulfilling every one of his fantasies in being ravaged and taken apart by you.
After the countless rounds that he begged for each time you filled him up, you were in the bathtub after cleaning him up thinking back to your book excited to continue where you left off in the story.
Sorry it took me longer than I though for it to come out! I hope you guys like this 🤭
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heavenlyhischier · 6 months
Text
𝐀𝐬 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝 𝐑𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐬 | 𝐋𝐮𝐤𝐞 𝐇𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐞𝐬
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word count: 2.5k
summary: it’s your turn to choose, and you just hope that you made the right choice.
warnings: angst, reader is kinda ‘pick me choose me’ but it’s okay, kissing, unedited as usual
part one
Luke broke up with his girlfriend the day after you left. Gave her some half-assed excuse of his life being too busy with hockey, but she knew the truth, and she didn’t fault him for it. He wanted to reach out to you, to call you, to text you, but he was smart enough to know it wasn’t a good idea. After the things he said to you and the way he undoubtedly made you feel, he knew you needed space away from him. How much space was the question that he didn’t know the answer to.
The first text you’d gotten from Luke was a simple ‘I’m sorry’ a week after you’d left that day. You were in class when it came through, and all you could do was stare at the message. You didn’t know what to do, and you couldn’t focus on the rest of the lecture, so you retreated to your apartment for the day and left the text unanswered. You opted to not tell Sage about the text, especially because she thought you had blocked him already.
The next text you got from him was the following day, and it was significantly longer than his previous one. He explained how sorry he was, how he had broken up with his girlfriend, how he wishes he could take it all back and have you in his life again, how he missed you. You didn’t respond to that one either, though you really wanted to, but he had hurt you. Luke had caused you the most heart stopping pain you’d ever felt in your life, and you needed to get rid of those feelings before you accepted him back as a part of your life.
Luke texted you every day now, telling you how sorry he was and he wasn’t going to give up on you so easily this time unless you explicitly told him not to. You never texted him and told him no, so he took that as an open invitation. The more time went on, the more descriptive his texts got and they started to chip away at the wall you had built between the two of you. There was one text you’d gotten from him that said he loved you, and if you didn’t know better, based on the context of the rest of the message, you would’ve thought he meant he was in love with you.
The one time you had texted Luke back, it was for selfish reasons and with the hope that it would make him a teeny bit mad. It was childish and immature, you knew that, but you couldn’t help it. It was the first time he’d worked up the courage to ask to see you, and you had texted him back saying that you couldn’t. Because you had a date that night. Luke’s heart fell to his stomach as he read the message over and over again.
“Jack,” Luke called out as he barged into his brother's room, “She’s going on a date. I told her that I love her, and she’s going on a date. What the fuck do I do?”
Jack sat on his bed, phone in hand as he glared at his brother. Ever since he got home that day and asked what had happened, Jack’s been pissed at his brother. He was an idiot who ruined the best thing that had ever happened to him, and Jack had no sympathy for that.
“Nothing,” He shrugged, gaze darting back to his phone as he scrolled through social media, “You do nothing, Luke. You fucked up. Bad. Now you have to deal with the consequences.”
“Yeah, thanks,” Luke scoffed, “I was hoping for some advice.”
“What do you want me to say, dude,” Jack angrily spoke, throwing his phone next to him, “That it’ll be okay? That you’ll get her back? Well, honestly I don’t think you should get her back. You don’t deserve her, Luke. She did everything for you. She was there for you anytime you needed her. She fucking chose you no matter what and you went and fucked that up for some girl you don’t even really know! I love you and I always will, but you don’t fucking deserve her forgiveness after the shit you did.”
While Luke was kicked out his brothers room, you were busy getting ready for your date that Sage was forcing you to go on. She claimed that he was a nice guy, a breath of fresh air after everything that had happened with Luke. You agreed to go, but told her that you would be driving yourself in case you weren’t feeling it and wanted to leave early. She, reluctantly, agreed to the terms and sent you on your way once you were ready.
About halfway through your drive to the restaurant, you realized that you were going the complete wrong direction. You were driving towards Luke’s apartment without even meaning to, and you weren’t sure if you wanted to turn around. The twisted part of your brain was telling you this was a sign, that you should give him a chance and talk to him, that maybe the two of you could give what had been broken between you. The logical part of your brain was telling you to turn around, go to the restaurant and forget that Luke Hughes ever existed. You weren’t sure what to do, but then you found yourself standing outside of his apartment door.
You stared at the door, your heart and mind waging the ultimate war within you. The urge to turn around and walk away dwindled by the second. You wanted to see him so you could yell at him, to tell him how badly he hurt you. You wanted to see if he missed you as much as you missed him, so you knocked on the door. If Jack was the one who answered, you were going to take that as a sign that Luke was gone for good, but it seemed as if fate was on your side.
Luke swung the door open, the greeting he had dying in his tongue when he saw you standing in front of him. You glared at him as you racked your brain for the angry speech you had planned out, but you were coming up empty now. Only one phrase on your mind as you were harshly brought back to the memories of that day in Luke’s room. The day he chose someone else over you.
“I hate you,” You tried to keep your voice steady, but it wavered as your bottom lip wobbled.
Luke didn’t know what to say as you stood in front of him in the outfit he assumed was for your date. Your eyes were lined with uncried tears, glassy and broken as they bore into his own. He felt his heart shatter inside of his chest when he noticed that the necklace he had gotten you for your sixteenth birthday and had worn ever since, was missing from your neck.
“I know,” Luke finally breathed out as he took every inch of you in like it was going to be the last time he was going to see you. To him, he thought it was going to be.
“I hate you,” You repeated, voice barely above a whisper as tears spilled over onto your cheeks. You felt pathetic for breaking so easily, but the plan you had to scream and yell at him went out the window the second you saw him in front of you.
“I know,” He swallowed thickly, hand twitching towards you, aching to pull you close, “I’m so sorry.”
“Why am I not worth choosing,” You sobbed as your gaze fell to the ground and you hugged your arms to your body.
In an instant, Luke was pulling you into his apartment, and into his arms. He held you as you cried into his chest, your tears soaking through his shirt, but he didn’t care. He rubbed circles in your back, not sure what the fuck he was supposed to say to you right now. He’d thought about this moment ever since you left two months ago, but now that you were right in front of him, he was clueless.
While Luke’s arms were holding you close, yours remained wrapped around yourself as sobs tore through your body. You wanted to reach out and never let him go, but you were scared and hurt. After what he’d done, you were afraid to let any part of him back in. You couldn’t go through that pain all over again; you’re not sure you would make it out this time.
Luke was glad that Jack was gone for the afternoon, off doing who knows what with who knows who. He knows that if he saw you crying in Luke’s arms, Jack would give him another earful of words he’s heard for the last two months. He didn’t want to hear how he didn’t deserve you or your forgiveness because he knew that he didn’t, but that didn’t mean he hadn’t been clinging onto hope. Hope was the only thing getting him through the day.
“I hate you so much,” You whispered, voice thick with emotion as you finally wound your arms around his waist.
Luke pulls you closer into his chest, tears of his own falling down on his cheeks as he listens to how broken you sound. He wants to say that he hates himself too, that he hates what he did to you, but he doesn’t want to make it about himself. At the end of the day, the way he felt was his own doing. He ruined your friendship and shut you out. He hurt himself.
“I’m so sorry,” Luke mumbled your name as if it was the most delicate thing in the entire world, “I’m sorry I hurt you. If I could— If I could take it all back I would. I would change everything if I could. But, I just— I don’t know what to do.”
“Tell me I’m worth choosing,” You begged, grasping at his shirt, “Or at least tell me why I'm not.”
Luke pulls away from you, but keeps his hands on your biceps as he looks at you. His cheeks are red and eyes heavy, but his face is serious. He’s sporting the same look he had when he forced you to listen to him tell you how much your ex boyfriend didn’t deserve you and how amazing you are.
“Listen to me, okay,” He started, his voice shaky and hesitant, “You are worth choosing, Y/N. In fact, you were always my only choice. You always have been, but that’s why I did what I did. I’m so fucking sorry I let you walk away that day. It was the worst mistake of my life, but I thought I was doing the right thing.”
“I don’t understand,” You shook your head, “Why would cutting me off be the right thing? Do you not want me in your life anymore?”
Panic bubbled in your chest as you let your mind run rampant with anxious thoughts. Regret in the form of bile rose in your throat, the desire to turn around and run away creeping back up. Your hands began to shake, an action Luke was quick to pick up on as he let go of your arms to capture them in his own.
“That’s not what I’m saying, I promise,” He softly reassured as he rubbed circles on the back of your hand with his thumb, “I thought it was the right thing because I thought it would help me move on. I’ve loved you since we were fifteen and I knew you didn’t feel the same way, so I thought choosing someone else would help me do that. Obviously, I was wrong.”
Your jaw went slack and your glassy eyes widened, your heart beating against your chest as you listened to him. It felt too good to be true; Luke admitting that he loved you the same way you loved him. It almost felt like you were dreaming, like you’d finally clawed your way out of the nightmarish reality that has been your life.
Luke felt like he was about to pass out the longer he sat with your silence surrounding him. He knew that confessing his feelings was a risky move given everything that had happened, but he needed you to know. He was hoping and praying that you felt the same, or that you’d at least welcome him back into your life as your friend again.
“You were wrong,” You swallowed the lump in your throat, “I did feel the same way about you.” Luke felt his heart fall to his feet. “I do still, but, Luke, you hurt me. I can’t just look past that. I’m not saying I can’t ever get over it, but it’ll take time.”
Without a second thought, Luke’s pulling you into his chest and wrapping his arms around you. Your arms instinctively wrap around his neck as you bury your face into his chest, taking in the way he felt against you. While you were still upset with him, there was no better feeling than in his embrace. It was always where you felt safest, and you hoped that that feeling would come back with time. Though, a small part of you was telling you it never left.
“I will do whatever it takes to earn your trust back,” Luke mumbled into the crook of your neck, “I love you, and I will spend my life proving that to you.”
“Luke,” You pulled away, eyes wide and pleading, “I don’t care if this is too soon, but can you please kiss m—”
He didn’t let you finish your sentence before crashing his lips onto your own. He pulled you into him by your waist as your hands moved up to tangle in his hair. Luke moved his mouth against yours, tasting the salt from both of your tears as he slipped his tongue into yours. It was a tangled mess of emotions as the two of you pushed against each other, but it was perfect.
After five years of what the two of you thought was unrequited love, you expected nothing short of desperation and yearning. You poured your entire being into the kiss, and by the way Luke was holding you like you would disappear, you knew he was too. The last time you were in the Hughes’ apartment, you felt like your entire world was collapsing below your feet. Now, you felt the world around you rise again and it was even more beautiful than before.
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