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adharastarlight · 5 months

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Slughorn: Mr Black, your homework is a day late

Regulus: I was off ill yesterday

Slughorn: you're conviently off a lot

Regulus: correlation does not imply causation

Slughorn: Mr Blac-

Regulus: listen sir, if you want to get onto this boat you should know that there are already six people here. One of them is screaming in the back, another is passed out and half falling out, two of them are rowing backwards, one of them is desperately rowing and wishing he could stick his head into the water and drown and the other is fucking critising everything he is doing. So if you want to pursue this conversation and get on this boat, you're fucking rowing

Slughorn: ...lovely to have you back in class, Mr Black

Regulus, sacrastically: wonderful to be here

#this was far more coherent in my head #but thats bc my mind makes zero sense #anyways enjoy #enjoy whatever this is #things i think in class but never have the guts to say so i let my babies say it instead #regulus black #regulus black kinnie #regulus arcturus black #trans regulus #marauders #james potter #jegulus #dead gay wizards #james x regulus #sirius black #remus lupin #starchaser #wolfstar #marauders incorrect quotes

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rosykims · 5 months

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ive played dao like 9 times at this point and still. and STILL the isolde/connor decision has me tearing my hair out gnawing my keyboard stomping around the house ready to lie down and never get up

#tay plays dao #in saying all that: i had an epiphany and im now at peace with elspeth killing this kid :) JKFJGKFG #I HATEEEEE IT I HATE THIS CHOUICE. AND YET. AND YETTTT #oc: elspeth #sigh. the things we do for rp........#so my reasoning is : she's the most moral/lawful/goody-good character you can find and lawful good in the truest sense of the term #so blood magic just isnt an option for her #also she does lothering > circle > redcliffe so she's seen what blood magic is capable of and its way too fresh in her mind #and as a noble with literally zero experience or understanding of magic... what shes seen of blood magic is SO bad she isnt abt to risk it #(i also dismiss the circle mages option outright because she wont risk redcliffe and the castle all dying while shes out wasting time)#but still its like... when she walks into that room prior to making the Choice she's so ADAMANT that she wont be killing a child #and upon leaving she still feels that way. again she doesnt rly know that much about demons so shes still like ok maybe i can just #incapacitate him?? reason with him??#bc thats what would happen to a hero in a story. they would find a way. there would be a happy ending. and she believes in happy endings #and she rly does see herself as the hero lol.#and then it doesnt happen and shes forced to make the choice and it absolutely destroys her sense of self. bc heroes dont DO that #and the story wasnt supposed to turn out this way !!!!!! and realizing this isnt some story and shes actually going to have to do #Horrific things. its a turning point for her #also a turning point for alistair and her relationship w him. bc he'd also put her on a pedastal this whole time #and now hes like. oh. all that honor and bravado is just something youre making up as you go huh #and then they have to get to know each other as flawed complicated people. not just.... ideals that they created of each other???#WHEW. THIS IS LONG. SORRY.#DRAGON AGE SEASON BABEY LETS FUCKING GO LOL

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kexing · 6 months

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Its so wild to see how openly and aggressively people hate forcebook and their work. Iknow bl opinions are so varied but other than the odd 'this is not for me' i never really come across hate for pairings on here (maybe its different on twitter idk) so its so insane that when it comes to fb people just stop being considerate to fans or even look to bother them actively. there are some actors who get rightly criticized for awful behaviour but with fb it just seems like its the one pairing that people are allowed to shit on and thats why they do it? bc what's the worst they've done? not act the way you would want them to or take part in a show you didn't like?? why would people then focus so much on them rather than focus on the stuff they do like? its so baffling i truly wonder if its just 'playground join in with the bully' behaviour. sorry thats been on my mind as someone who only filters into bl every now and then, its so strange.

hi there!

RIGHT????? before them, i had never seen hate for pairings on this level. i knew about some problematic actors and pairings that had broken up so most people had moved on but actual gratuitous hate??? was unknown to me.

i used to think we all minded our business with our faves and everyone lived in peace. at least it was like that here on tumblr for my first years of bl. i do think twitter is different and probably worse, but the way their behavior has been poisoning tumblr as well is concerning.

truly. i don’t KNOW what’s with forcebook that people seem to enjoy hating on them. they’ve been on the public eye for nearly two years now, they have zero rumors, zero scandals, zero accusations, work hard, just do their thing, openly support the lgbtq+ community, all their coworkers like them, for fanfest in japan geminifourth, joong and phuwin went to force’s room in the middle of the night to hang out because their adore spending time with him, their previous directors adore them, p’film considers forcebook his actual children and p’new opens his arms for book to bear hug him whenever he sees him.

hell, even their old classmates from school came forward to say they were really nice people back then. that force was popular because he was friends with everyone and book was quiet but sweet.

when there’s actual deeply problematic actors out there. people who get accused of unspeakable things EVERY SINGLE DAY. and fans still defend them and give them 937482848384 chances.

it just doesn’t make sense to me. WHY would you be so obsessed with someone you don’t like? focus on your faves instead of complaining about other people just doing their job!!!!!!!!!!

i do usually call it “hate train” because it seems like everybody’s hopping on it just because it’s going around a lot.

but STILL. i see some criticism that’s just baffling. the way people will take forcebook’s words out of context and attack them with it, invent shit saying they’re nepotism babies (they are not). some even use forcebook’s friendship against them which is????? surreal. jobless behavior. go find a hobby or something else to do???? WHAT ARE YOU GAINING FROM ALL THIS?????

force and book are very open about their friendship and how it’s not perfect because they like being honest with us instead of painting a false image of their relationship, it’s not for people to turn it into weapons!! the disrespect is just so infuriating!

i’m not asking for everyone to start loving forcebook, just RESPECT THEM. or even ignore them. but don’t ruin things for them 😭😭😭 and us fans who are just trying to support them.

it’s okay! i wonder about the same things every single day. and i sincerely don’t know if i’m just too biased or something but i have never understood the amount of hate and still don’t because i would never do this to anyone. i never expected things to become like this.

but oh well :/

#anonymous #mj got mail!

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homophyte · 22 days

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thank you for the long & thought out response. while i do fully agree with you on stances like prison abolition & the myth of the stranger pedophile scapegoat, my question and discomfort with jimmy’s actions comes not so much from a political/philosophical standpoint but from a very human emphatic one. i put myself in the shoes of the girl he groomed and abused and imagine people listening to and enjoying the music of my abuser and it makes me sick to my stomach. so thats more where my guilt and discomfort comes from. that said i can’t say that their music doesn’t have an impact or isn’t enjoyable. i also agree with you that this mass outrage and very public renunciation and demand for punishment is very much a social mechanism and automatic reaction that quite simplifies a complex situation. however these mechanisms exist for a certain evolutionary purpose after all (sorry my background is psychology) but thats sort of besides the point because im also not a fan of how these things get handled with zero nuance.

its also true what you said that me or you or anyone deciding to disengage with this band or their music changes nothing in the grand scheme of things, so doing it as some sort of Noble Cause against abuse is useless. so in this case i feel it’s up to personal preference and whether or not i can swallow the cognitive dissonance and discomfort this information arises in me whenever i listen to their music from now on.

thanks again for the insightful response, i’m glad we can have this sort of discussion because i also think this topic is extremely important but people often shy away from it because it’s so heavy.

im glad you asked me to share! like i said ive spent a lot of time thinking abt this specifically so its very much like years worth of mishmash thoughts kinda strung together only by me experiencing them over time in succession lol. but i agree its important to talk about it especially within a culture so ensnared in the logic of the prison and particularly how effectively thats been exported into like 'mob justice' for lack of a better word.

re: the emotive aspect im not sure i have much to say other than like Yeah its a very strong one and i dont think its a bad thing at all to have. i got the impression from ur ask--and idk how true this is--that you were wrestling between a desire to return to the music bc you enjoyed it and that response preventing you and feeling a sort of obligation to do one over the other n struggling with that. so i think i approached it as like 'heres ways you can reason w that emotional response and grapple w it if its smth ur agonizing over' or something like that. im also a firm believer in the ways politics shapes the ways we think n feel so my instinct was to tease out some of the structures that may be shaping ur thought processes--which of course i nor anyone but you can fully know. but i dont get that same sense from how u describe it here and either way i think whatever feeling ur having about it is like...i dont want to say its 'valid' but ur allowed to have that and do whatever you want pretty much lol. i cant and am not going to force anyone to engage w the band and theres probably more reasons than i could think to list why its not for everyone even without the sordidness of abuse hanging over it.

without getting into a much much broader discussion i would gently push back on the idea of a biologically innate reason for the existence of carceral/punitive logics (and frankly psychology more broadly), if only bc it does a lot of the work of justifying them. keep in mind that these are concepts ideas and patterns of thought that exist because they serve systems of power and particularly the state. we did not have to have a society which created them, we only happen to--which is to say theyre not innate in this way and i disagree that they have an 'evolutionary' purpose bc it fails to properly historicize them. but thats me coming from an antipsych position lol

#asks #frankly for me its like....sometimes we do feel that emotional reaction n sometimes we dont #and im interested in where the difference is or where the line is drawn #some things are considered 'too big to fail' theres plenty of other much more influential musicians that have equal or worse allegations #but nowhere near the same response #and part of this is just 'size' its much more effective to do this to a smaller artist n a smaller community than like potential millions #of say michael jackson fans right. so part of this for me is yeah why does jimmy urine make ppl feel so strongly #and again part of it is 'size' msi is smaller its like 'cult classic' music for lack of a better word and its obviously evidently queer #so u can weaponize that extant fear of queer ppl and within the queer community of people fearing us #thats not to like diagnose that as something going on w u just that like....the emotional response itself is politically complicated #is what im going for here #so sorry i gave u a bunch a lot of stuff that may not have had anything to do with how ur feeling . i was thinking about other shit #im glad u appreciated though lol!

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spacedhead · 8 months

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homestuck reread #11: act 6 p2

aranea first appearance!!! shes so beautifullll hi girl

okay so i think i misremembered this specific comversation. in a previous conversation with roxy, roxy accidentally IMPLIED that jane might have feelings for him. but then jake was like yeah i already know that she has a thing for me but then since he knows roxy isnt supposed to talk about it he agrees to drop it. then here he is like hey jane do you like me? be honest. just come out and say it. do you? and she is like clearly not ready to be honest yet so shes like uh no i dont

so then hes like oh you dont well thats crazy i thought you did. but then hes like . are you sure? and she is like... haha i guess not... GAHHH THIS IS SO PAINFUL TO READ. but the problem im finding is that i feel like jake is in the wrong here but like i dont know i might do the same thing. if i suspected someone liked me and then got soft confirmation from their best friend i might also approach the situation by asking for confirmation rather than being like I KNOW YOU LIKE ME. but maybe the real thing i would do is wait for them to tell me... i honestly dont know what the right answer is... like what was his best option here because what he did felt so wrong. and jane. poor jane. she is suffering with the weight of liking this FREAK . its just hard cause i wanted her to be honest but i also get why she wasnt

i dont even want to show this next part but jake after this is telling jane about how he thinks dirk wants to date him (which he does) and jane is just. suffering . but she keeps telling him to like go for it? like why are you sabotaging yourself like this?? i get shes trying to be a good friend but like at what cost girl your sanity?? and how is he this socially unaware when he has proven that he can pick up on the hints that jane liked him even BEFORE roxy accidentally implied it?? but now he cant tell that jane is OBVIOUSLY not happy with the situation. i actually cant tell if hes being a cruel person and deliberately ignoring her feelings or if hes just suddenly unable to pick up on her feelings. i GUESS in his defense there has been this ongoing theme of his friends saying that he has a tendency to believe people at face value and believe IN people. get it. because hope. but that is dumb and in my opinion a weak defense

to be fair. he is glasses

what heaven looks like (without the dead cat)

AHHHHH JUMPSCARE

god damn you. tumut

this is really cool

me every time i get mad and my friends call me delusional

this section of dirk giving jake the Lore is cool. look at alpha dave he is so awesome

holy balls look at rose too

HELL YEAH

Sadge

DO YOU OR DO YOU NOT KNOW THAT JANE HAS A THING FOR YOU....... WHAT IS HAPPENING

hee hee look at lil seb

this baller ass panel. hes so cool he has a fucking SWORD

look at him go!!!!

AHHH I LOVE THIS PANEL EVERYONE IS SO SILLY!!!!!!

me when im the dumbest boy in paradox space

wait this makes sense to me. the seer of mind can see brain ghost dirk. that is so cool

I AM CRESTFALLEN. (also jane and roxy just died so that is very sad too. but they have dreamselves.) shit is kind of hitting the fan when all the alpha kids are trying to enter. also calliope just got name and appearance revealed so... hey

this is funny

HUHHHHH

ok so i watched s dirk synhcronize. really good flash! some things i noticed. 1. there is that tumblr post that is like dirk just high fives meenah without even knowing who she is or what a troll is. that is wrong he DOES know what a troll is and had already briefly met her like right before the high five happened . 2 its crazy that he has no fear or hesitation when he puts his own head in the transportalizer. like bro really just was willing to kill himself for his friends. i know that he lives bc of his dreamself but still to have ZERO hesitation shows how much he loves them all. 3 in the beginning of homestuck john needed a sledge hammer to open his cruxtruder and throughout the comic most of the characters have needed to drop something heavy on the lid to pop it open but dirk just fucking kicks it open with little effort . actual baller

based hal

this goofy ass scene look at roxys face its so me

fuuuuuck i just watched caliborn enter... lord english destroyed the dream bubble with the john who died and a couple dead daves... (and a bunch of alternate trolls) man i fucking HATE that guy....

shes real or somefin

dude. not cool

i fuckin love his hashtags

LOOK AT THEM

gender envy

im out of image space but ........ to be continued. this is definitely... like... i feel like after cascade the comic came to an abrupt stop. and it is taking a while for things to get going again. maybe once they arrive at the new session

#joff hs reread #sadge #the girls and the gays #hs

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nyaagolor · 8 months

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First up- I LOVE your analysis and lore and everything, and as the number one Geeta lover you are literally one of the only people who I would see write "Geeta team edit" and actually keep reading. Most of these are done in such bad faith, so thank you for just not. I DO however have a few thoughts.

I think Espathra as a lead is actually really good. The opportunist ability stops players from boosting at the start of the battle, lumina crash is an absolute menace, and espathra's association with being beautiful and viscous I think really fits the overall theme of Geeta and her team. I would love to see espathra running stored power, but that's a nitpick.

Armarouge/ceruledge are absolutely amazing picks and definitely should have been on the team, 100% agree. I think ceruledge would again fit her overall look and theme better.

Gholdengo...like I fully get what your saying about it being rare to find and a good choice in that sense, but I really think champion teams should show off their personality first and foremost. And gholdengo is so gotdamn silly, I just can't see it working with her team/vibe.

I actually really like gogoat tbh. Ik it's not a Paldean Mon but idk the rest of the team around it just really pulls it in thematically. Theres not a lot of reasoning here I just like it lmao. Same with veluza tbh, although again I think this one fits her theme really well. Also I despise rabsca. Personal opinion on that one lmao

10000000% agree about putting glimmora with Geeta in the same way as Nemona and pawmot, absolutely! And also making glimmora way harder to find in game, yes! I admit I did like finding out about the connection between Geeta and area zero after the fact, purely because it keeps Geeta relevant in the post game lmao. It's just nice to have her continue to be mentioned even while off screen and in theory done story-wise. I will say that glimmora can hit like a special truck, and I personally love using it as an ace/sweeper, but again thats my preference. I find it's actually kinda wasted potential using it for just set up. The ability is honestly more of a nice bonus than something to hinge the whole strat on.

That's all! Again, love your analysis sososo much! I just read it and got thoughts and wanted to share because I am constantly rotating Geeta and her team in my mind. And also like. The aesthetic and the theme are sooooo important

hiii thank u!! Talking about Geeta in any capacity is a goddamn nightmare bc there's like a 50% chance that if you don't have a giant blocklist someone is gonna come into ur notifs like "well um Actually" about something. We in the trenches out here. Anyway

Espathra: So a few people have pointed out that Espathra fits her really well either as an lead or just for the vibes and after thinking about it I'm inclined to agree. I didn't include it at first because it's Tulip's Paldea ace and I hate repeats but tbh? Tulip can find another psychic type. Geeta gets the bird now. Maybe that's why Tulip hates her so much

Celruedge: So I uh. Actually made a slight mistake in my original post. I meant to update it so she always has a Celruedge bc Mela has an Amarogue and then forgot to update the post before it posted so. Oops! Anyway yeah agreed Celruedge is cooler for this

Gholdengo: Imma be real with you I hate this thing. I included it on her team because no one else uses it and it would be a fun surprise but also I hate it. It doesn't fit her vibes whatsoever and I just wanna know Why it looks like that. A debateably necessary evil

The only reason Gogoat isn't in this team is bc I made a rule that they had to be exclusively Paldean pokemon. I am her Gogoat's number one fan I am ride or die for that thing. Giving him a little kiss on the forehead. I'm a Geeta's Gogoat apologist

I don't know anything about comp but I have friends that do and they mentioned Glimmora being her ace would require a lot of teambuilding around it which I don't know how to do nor do I want to. Lead or ace or whatever-- it's her little guy

Thanks for the ask!!

#mod vex #ask

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shima-draws · 1 year

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If am//rshipping becomes canon i will riot i swear. literally anything else is... not fine, but more or less acceptable. ash and serena barely spoke to each other, they havent spoken in months. any other xy character (cough clemont cough) has had better interactions with ash at this point. if they make am//r canon now it would be out of nowhere. im fine with them not even meeting tbh if thats what it takes to have it not become a thing. this isnt hate to the fans of that ship btw, i just think it wouldnt make sense narratively right now. literally anyone else is alright, even misty, like you said, because at least they have 11 episodes together now.

Gonna put Amo//shipping on blast so those of you who are fans of it please keep scrolling lol

Anyway yeah. YEAH. Generally I'm very open minded about ships and tend to enjoy just about everything, but Amo//shipping is just. It's the one. It's the ONE I cannot stand, my only true notp, the one I can actually say I have a very intense dislike if not hatred for. Which is a strong word but god,,

I've ranted before about why I don't like the ship and why I think they'd work better paired with literally anyone else so I won't repeat all the same shit I've said about it for years now lmao but. Anyway. Hard agree. Especially since they kinda stopped developing any sort of progression in them potentially "getting together" at the end of XY. The one time Ash and Serena saw each other after that was super fleeting and Serena wasn't falling over herself to get his attention and Ash didn't even bring up the kiss at all, or make any sort of indication that "Oh hey yeah she kissed me and now I'm all shy around her/might have feelings for her". There's been NO hints since XY which is the one relieving thing about this bc if they decided to make it canon now it'd feel very rushed and out of nowhere bc there's been zero development throughout all of Journeys. And unless they plan to take several episodes of the epilogue miniseries focusing on their relationship (which I HIGHLY doubt) I don't see it happening. There might still be a chance which is why I'm still sitting here like "ONE FEAR" but I'm trying to convince myself we're safe from it becoming canon lol

And yeah narratively it doesn't make any sense. It doesn't really make sense for any Ash-centric ship to become canon as of right now, but idk what exactly the miniseries is going to do. I'm assuming tying up loose ends and hitting on whatever things Journeys didn't get to touch on but I don't know for sure? We'll just have to wait and see I guess

#Ask to tag I guess? I don't really know what to put here #Shima answers questions #Pokemon #Pokeani

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lovphobic · 1 year

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10 13 20 26 38 and 49 for all of them, or if not, whoever you want to yell about most (^:<

SO MANY!! (explodes)

10. What kind of jokes make them laugh?

sildraste: in my head i imagine her as a very stoic person. closed off and reserved. no vulnerability. but thats not... necessarily true? she'd probably like.. jokes that dont really make a great deal of sense, or jokes we think are absurd. think feeding the donkey a fig and washing it down with wine :') - thalya: she is VERY pure of heart. and very childish. almost every good natured joke will make her laugh. knock knock. whos there. owls. owls who. yes they do. (loud, from the heart laughter. knee slapping) - morant: it is SO hard to make her laugh. it has to be a GENUINELY funny, original joke. she takes herself too seriously sometimes - valdys: she'll laugh at someone tripping on the sidewalk (not out of meanness) and also "deez nuts". she's like.. the other side of thalya in a way. except shes more immature than childish LMAO

13: Describe your character's typical wardrobe for the regular day

OK so i am NOT great at describing clothes myself, so this is going to be very image heavy

sildraste: i have been workshopping her outfit for two years now.. and i still dont really know. im kind of tinkering w the idea of her being more feminine presenting? not sure how i feel about it just yet bc, as i said, i cant facking think of outfit ideas. anyways, that being said: outside of the Usual Dnd Chaos And Battle, like.. After her story is said and done. i guess i could see her in something like this for sure. DURING her story.. i hope u do not mind me not using my entire brain for this one question and instead using an existing picture... but something like this maybe! - thalya: pre sildraste it was something like this for sure, just replace the skirt for whatever the dnd equivalent of jeans would be LMAO. but post sildraste i can imagine it as something like this. i can definitely see her reverting to pre after everything is said and done though :^) - morant: you know, for a character that is pretty much my self insert.. my mary sue... she does not dress like me at all! shes very dark colors, slacks and long jackets/cloaks. think this and this. i hate to say it but shes definitely d*rk ac*dem*a. - valdys: MODERN 70s!!!!!! COLORS. BELL BOTTOMS. FLARE SLEEVES. LIKE THIS!!!! she is the only one i know FOR SURE. shes definitely modern, like what we'd wear today. but w the SPICE and FUN of the 70s

20: Does your character have a comfort item?

sildraste: oh you KNOW its thalya's necklace. as destructive as it is (which she doesnt. like. Know.) its definitely her comfort item - thalya: i think either she doesnt have one, or she is a bit too new for me to have figured an answer out! so, right now, she does not! - morant: dagger :) i havent figured out the importance yet, but its there - valdys: in direct mirrorage of morant.. there is ZERO importance at all to her item. she just thinks its neat and it brings her happiness. her chicken plushie. i imagine it looking something like this. this answer may change in the future but it is what it is for now!

26: Are they an animal person? Do they have pets?

sildraste and morant i wouldnt say are animal people. they Like animals, but i cant see them owning one. i could only see them owning a pet if its co-owned with their respective partner

thalya is DEFINITELY an animal person. she may have been a jeweler's apprentice but she also spent a fair bit of time with the farm animals of the town, helping out and being a general ray of sunshine always. no pets though, currently - valdys would have a cat 100%. one of those stupidly fluffy white ones that shed like a motherfucker. this cat. specifically.

38: How does your character unwind after a long day?

sildraste: ngl she probably gets wasted. it is what it is. always been like that. get her some therapy - thalya: quite the opposite. probably takes a nice bath. rose petals if the day was especially long/hard. - morant: she doesnt. she just goes to bed - valdys: most of her "long" days come from her mothers bullshit. she makes little imaginary vlogs for her imaginary audience alone in her room which 100% consist of what would be called trauma dumping. JGHDKJGHDK

49: What is your character's biggest fear? Most irrational?

sildraste: funny that. its losing thalya. LOL. shes a very rational person for the most part though. despite everything - thalya: she definitely has fears.. but how do you in sound mind have fears when you were this close to being dead. in comparison that makes whatever fear(s) she has seem so infinitesimal. her most irrational though is probably just.. being hated. nobody hates her. shes not a hateable person. which in itself is... something to think about. how can a person have Nothing to dislike. what are you hiding. what are you compensating for. - morant: dying <3 but i think valdys is her irrational fear FKJSDHFJKSAHFUIASHJFKSDH. morant "HATES" her and thinks valdys also hates her. but valdys is stupid pining. morant though. thinks she is plotting to murder her in her sleep. there is miscommunication here unfortunately. she is stupid - valdys: shes pretty fearless i wont lie. but the answer would probably be being misunderstood. she doesnt always come off on the right foot. but shes earnest. her irrational fear though..

ok i cant think of anything. so sorry. but i got to the end and this is the only one i said "hard give up" on. so please applaud me

#this took me almost 2 hours. what being a non-creative will do to a mf #snail mail

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insert-neologism · 28 days

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decided to not make a whole analysis bc. thats much so im just gonna like write my thoughts to each line! slay.

spiracle by flower face - notes

!!i dont have like many symbolism here yet. and with that i mean almost nothing; i was mainly, like, testing the waters or smth bc it was the first one etc and i wasnt really familiar with anything just yet.

I want your quiet, your screaming and thrashing

jackie's quiet, shauna isnt.

The salt on your lips and the hands that god gave you

'salt' -> ocean -> water

And I want your violence, your silent sedation(....) who ever she killed not sure

violence is pretty obvious i think; sedation sounds kinda sterile to me and the clip too

Your moon eyes, your telescope,

literally had no other ideas

morbid fixation

it does seem. morbid sorta

And I want your pyro,

fire

your born-again virgin

she wasnt a vigrin when she died. but for a pretty long time. and shes like 'born again' in shaunas mind yk??

Your hands on my insides, your fingertips crawling

makes sense

And I want your Jesus,

I THINK she sorta looks like holy?? savior typa IDK how to say that. but it reminds me of jesus.

your suicide mission

died

Your lips on the microphone,

bc shes like leading, actively the captain

soft disposition

looks rlly soft <3

And I want your parties,

party

the shark in your water

fit somehow im not sure anymore ahhh also dont have any notes. but i still think it fits

The scrapes on your knees and the blood that spills over

blood that spills over = cheating

And I want your zeroes,

sorta seems at a low point

your polluted marrow

.sorta obvious i think

The sweat on your palms and

bc shes like nervous, she doesnt know what to say

your surveillance shadow

she still there, in the distance, watching over shauna and she cant get closer; if jackie is a shadow, then shauna is the light.

I want your secrets,

fits with jackies line

your clementine fields

i googled clemetine meaning and it means innocence and i thought that fit like rlly well

The ropes that you climb up,

sorta a stretch; the ropes are jeff (that shes climbing for a 'normal', heterosexual life). jackie wants this (otherwise she wouldntve been with jeff pre crash) but shauna is the one to eventually actually climb them/marry him.

the parts that won't heal

still succumbs to violence or however you want to call it. thought it more fitting to her killing adam bc the rabbit required like precision n shit

I want your safe word,

idk

your passive resistance

shauna doesnt want it, but still isnt active.

The sickness you foster, your favorite addictions

quite obvious too i think. personally one of my fav parts

And I want your nightmares, the ghost in your doorway

shes a ghost, shes in something sort of resembling a doorway

Your paralyzed sleep and your- [scream]

thought it was funny, also it is indeed true. if i like had to choose then the scream is my fav part i think esp bc it just lines up so wellll like the death scene and everything really

I want you, butterfly, I want you, sailor

actually asked sb what theyd say who is who but since ive watched it like a feww times and: jackie is the butterfly bc shes a beautiful (and seen as such) and fragile (was the first to die). also she has a butterfly shirt (which is worn by shauna later on - which was actually the reason I asked sb! bc i was unsure if i should use shauna in the shirt. but then i decided against it, mainly bc i didnt like the vibe of the clip and i wanted them to interact). the symbolic meaning of butterflies doesnt really fit her (transformation, change, growth)(really its more the opposite) BUT it doesnt fit shauna as well.

shauna is the sailor bc she like sailed away and left jackie behind, a million miles apart and unable to do anything but to dream of each other (which jackie is doing then). technically, jackie is leaving here, but this is still jackies last goodbye (even though its imagined)

I am your lover and I am your jailor

originally 'I am your lover' was supposed to be 'thats not what youre hungry for' but i changed it. Not sure why (like id do it again but idk why) but its like. shes (the picture) her lover shes gone she wont (cant) ever come back (not rlly) shes representing everything that was and thats been lost (everything thats irredemable. shauna herself.) shes her lover but shes not real (shes not even a hallucination that only shauna can see, but a picture that everyone can see and does see bc its on a really big screen on a get-together with many people; shes not shaunas, she doesnt belong to shauna which she never has - even though thats all that shauna wants. (I think jackie thinks, or at least feels otherwise. whcih shauna doestn know, of course, cause their communication is ATROCIOUS)). shes never been real, actually, cause whats shown on the screen is the jackie that shes been showing them, not the one she really is (today she is pretending for shauna, too. she doesnt, cant see her real self, who she really is; theres nothing beneath the surface of 'jackie, homecoming queen' anymore)

shauna is the jailor bc she wont let jackie go. in doing that (and in living the life jackie was supposed to live, represented by jeff being with her at the function) shes also her own jailor

#LONG POST #like fr guys #anyways #sorta got out of hand at the end lol #i want to stress for anyon who reads the tags first: there was NOT much symbolism in there. mostly just 'lol ill look where thisll go'#if youre here for that #if not idk knock urself out #a glimpse in my sick and twisted psyche #mitos incredible life #jackieshauna: The Shark In Your Water

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pezpenser205 · 1 month

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btw i didnt realize how funny this was until i started working on it but i do want to share because the concept is insane and one of the weirdest things ive ever done that i think would be some shit a psychologist would have a field day with. so when i kill myself (because thats 100% gonna be how ill die theres not even any debate in my mind atp and ive been hyperfixated on killing myself recently. yes my hyperfixation rn is suicide and i cant concentrate on anything else. very serious im so serious about this. not kidding. either that or ill die by falling somewhere like in the shower bc my knees have been degenerating bc of genetic reasons and i have terrible balance) im gonna post an entire character assassination document on myself listing off every reason why you shouldnt feel bad for me and everything ive done wrong in college APA format (at least everything ive done wrong that i know of and feel free to mention if im missing something after i post it. not that ill be able to edit it though sorry /silly) so people will finally fucking get why ive come to the (Objectively Correct) conclusion that i shouldnt exist due to me only getting worse and less valuable with age like some kind of reverse wine or cheese.

it is a provable math equation. ive written it. im formatting this like its a product pitch to rich investors. it will be an absolutely ironclad essay with zero rebuttal and it will be awesome and hopefully the only of its kind /hj

i literally planned to make an entire spreadsheet accompanying it to keep everyone from pitying me or thinking my suicide note is a pity ploy im deadass. i didnt realize how ridiculous this idea was until i started on the outline earlier and i suddenly gained more awareness of what i was doing. i am voluntarily putting more effort into an essay on why i suck than i ever put into anything else in my entire life and if that isnt a perfect representation of every reason why i shouldnt be here.

im gonna be the first guy ever to do a character assassination on himself if i die just so people wont mourn me or treat it like some great tragedy even for a second out of a weird sense of obligation to my family or the fact that i was a trans sibling of theirs or whatever. i am going to make sure that people read that document and are like "wow this guy had a few issues i fucking hate this guy im glad hes dead. anyway rip bozo lmaooo. even if this guy wasnt trans he for sure wouldve killed himself and good on him for doing so"

i wouldnt have it any other way either i genuinely hope people meme the shit out of me dying because my entire life up until this point has been me internalizing a caricature of every bad trait people have told me i had until i dont enjoy anything on my own and cease to be a standalone person when i dont have external validation constantly feeding me good things to overshadow the bad stuff ive internalized. im very plainly and transparently a fake caricature of a toxic person thats hollow on the inside and nothing else so its only fair that people get to make fun of those traits when im dead too.

being able to lay out the extremely stupid and meandering reasons why ive developed this way (looking back most of them are 100% my fault also) is going to look like some kind of bogus alchemy. i literally purposely made myself mentally ill when i was 10 or 11 because of septiplier and sanscest lemon fanfic. consciously and intentionally. you cant tell me that fact alone isnt hilarious. thats gold who even does that. thats satire thats not a real person who exists and yet i do exist right here in this desk chair (which is why i shouldnt exist /lh)

this is really a dark subject matter but i genuinely believe this document is gonna be really funny okay. theres already so much good copypasta material here. i for real do not believe there is anyone on earth who has developed in quite this weird fucking way thats has whatever kind of "im too self aware and accepting of my own flaws to function as a real person" disorder that i have and i want to leave something of that behind so whatever is wrong with me wont be lost.

all of this to say, just know if i die you have something to look forward to at least because i wish i could be there to see if anyone actually reads it when it drops and im not even DONE yet. the one thing im really good at is dramatic displays of suicidality and internalizing every word anyones ever said to me/about me apparently like thats the only thing thats stayed consistent throughout everything im writing in this silly little word document.

drapes myself over a fainting couch. woe is me. the most earnest art ive made in years is about how im unable to produced anything worthwhile. the irony is palpable and beautiful. wish i could put this energy into Literally Anything Else but alas that is the point of the essay

#op #suicide #suicide joke #i am so desensitized to the concept of my own death that ive turned my suicide note into a joke even though it started serious #and honestly thats beautiful #i love me

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zak-shit · 2 months

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march 1st 2024 9:14 pm

don't greatly feel like doing this rn, but i know I do need to.

brain is constantly racing lately. i mean constantly i really do.

the grief of losing lisa has been coming harder, i really miss her and i cant believe she is really gone. i will never forget that woman. lisa was truly my favorite person growing up. she's a real angel now.;/ Marisa Lynn just called me while I was writing the below stuff, she said new years eve was the best. I think about thanksgiving alot too, we had a all nighter, I'll never forget seeing Lisa on the back porch as the sun came up. and that was practically the last time I really saw her. Her health went downhill so quick after that.. I had the thought earlier like things just came together in a way, and that night was almost a send off for her. except nobody knew. it was really our fucking reunion., and it turned into our last night together.

tomorrow ive got to go to my brother casey's wedding ;| i haven't seen this side of my family in like nearly 5 years. i ordered something I really like to wear, something that is appropriate, but also boldly ME. It may not arrive in time, and I don't know what to wear in that situation yet, also don't know if what I already have that is appropriate is something i feel comfortable wearing/ me. :/ but its fineeeeeee this wedding will happen. i'm going to see both of my brothers tomorrow, my dads brother (he's chill) and my other niece's and nephews. just weird bc i don't know these people honestly. we have a zero on the relationship bar. idk that just makes me anxious, uncomfortable... shruggg. i just know when I have a life event I wouldn't invite them, but I feel obligated. however i do also feel immensely happy for Casey, the divorce of his first marriage im sure was extremely hard for him. i'm glad he has a great partner now, large happy family. he seems content the last few times I'd seen him. Casey is the only one I have seen in the last 5 years. My aunts funeral, fathers day like two years ago, and Marissas baby shower. He is a good guy, and he deserves to be celebrated and have who he wants to show up for him, show up. I'll also have Cece, and Marissa there to keep me company.

i feel alone. Wrote that before Marisa Lynn called me. Expecting and hoping she calls me back. Idk, its Friday night and I'm all alone, not much is stimulating to me. I don't have a hyper fixation right now, so its like I have nothing lol. makes me feel like a zombie just coasting through life. I understand why my comfort/ favorite/ go to people cant hang out tonight but idk I miss them. And I had to cancel plans with Alyssa for tomorrow bc I changed my mind on attending the wedding. Texted her asking about other days after we talked and she said she was soooo happy I was going. and nothinnnnnn. idk a little "let me seee" and then get back to me would be nice... i know shes got alot going on though. im not upset with her at all. but I miss her :( Ruby cant hang because her back is killing her :( also not upset with her at all, i see her all the time lol. but idk maybe i'm just a bit bored... I have decided to start working shows at the theatre again! maybe partly for a little stimulation. Its been so long since I've done a show! I used to think strongly that I couldnt do it because I'm not getting payed.. but I was never payed before, I always did it because I enjoyed it so much! Its something to do thats a passion of mine. also the sense of community is great and admirable. everyone who is there.. wants to be there! its not like at work where people are miserable. I applied on the website, but i think I'll draft an email to someone tonight. I wanna jump on this burst of energy for it before it goes away and I don't take it up again. plus I'd like to see how much I like it. Crazy being able to get back into hobbys. lol for so long I thought it was possible to make time for it. and hey with me being active there again, maybe it would be easier to also get Cece into it.

I also bought some adderal from Kerri, I think thats what has awoken quite a bit inside me. i really need this shit to be real human. lol especially the highted emotions. I've actually cried both yesterday and today. and its been so therapeutic. Lisa also took me to my first audition into the theatre, she sat there while I did it, she filled out the paperwork. I thank her for that. I wished I could in person because that really means alot not looking back and seeing how far that took me/ changed my life. it really did change my life. so did our pitch perfect binges. <3

my mom has been really good lately. she stopped drinking as much. like for a few weeks, maybe 2 weeks. she didnt really drink at all. shes been alot more active around the house, she said she would treat herself to it on saturdays. which is fair, thats cool. so yesterday, a thursday when I came home and I could tell she at least had a buzz going on, it instantly locked up. idk i was dissappointed, i was angry, I was sad. It triggered me for sure, because, for once I wasnt expecting it. at least on Saturdays I would expect it. I can clock when shes had a sip of alcohol better than I can clock probably anything. so she cant lie to me about it.. but also highly emotional on it because I've wanted the last few weeks to be our reality for so long, and so badly... she really seems ready to cut it down to one day a week. and I know she can do it, she just did it. she just has to stick to it. I have high hopes, thats why I didnt blow up or something about it, also because i'm smarter than that, i know time and place to be heard best. and after a drink its never there. I just mentioned it this morning. I think she had a tiny bit to drink tonight too.

currently talkin flirtin with trey <3 i want him :((

xoxo wasted a bunch of time its now 12:29 am need to try to get sleepy byeeee

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rougrotti · 5 years

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#yall mind if i... vent #do you even just realize how little you mean to someone who means so much to you #like i guarantee you if we stopped talking it wouldnt even make a different in your life #idk why the fuck i let it hold so much weight on me like!! they obviously dont care about you the same way just let it fucking go #but i cant ive never been the type that was able to just cut someone off i cant fucking do it #it just sucks bc ill start to get over it and tell myself that i dont need them and #god i just realized in the muddle of writing this that like no one cares and i never mean for that to come off #as trying to get attention i just like the comfort of knowing people can actually see this its not private #thats always comforted me even if no one interacts with it (sometimes i prefer that) just knowing there are people probably reading it #makes me feel better idk why ive always been like that #but anyways yeah idk whats going on in my brain rn #i just needed to kinda do this #wish i had people to vent to irl so i wouldve have to do this:)#i just read this and oof its a mess and makes zero sense but i feel a little better so #im weird im sorry dlkxjdnxn

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tons-of-vball-huns · 2 years

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could u maybe do a post thats kenma x male reader (or gender neutral, whatever you’re comfortable with !!) where the reader and kenma are hanging out together at kenmas house, and the reader realizes they like him bc he asks to hold their face bc their eyes are so pretty <3 idk just rlly wholesome cutsey affectionate non sexual face holding

like hand on ur cheeks <3 and like kenma asks to hug the reader bc they get really uncomfortable w hugs but they feel okay to get hugged that day

i hope youre having a good day, and if you’re not, hopefully you find time to do something u enjoy :)

sorry my brain is scattered 😭/gen

[a/n: wait that sounds so cute! i have to do this asap because Y E S. thanks for the request, anon! also, i’m making it a gn!reader because that’s kinda like how it usually go about it and i changed it a tiny bit. btw, sorry for being late! love you, keep being you <3]

requests are open! i might be a bit late with the posting because my sat is coming up this saturday.

request is below the cut!

starring: k. kenma

type: fluff. fluffy fluffy fluff

warnings/others: unhealthy sleeping habits. weird formatting. commas galore. intended lowercase. use of “heck” and “hell”.

wc: 793 words

fun fact: kenma gets clingy and weirdly cuddly when he’s feeling tired or sleepy and even sleeps while cuddling a large dog plushie. he also takes the brain filter out and just says what he says without a thought and, in his opinion, acted like a drunk person.

fun fact: he would rather die miserably than let other people know about this. he hides the dog inside a suitcase whenever he leaves his room and has even made an elaborate plan to escape to brazil and start his life over if anyone gets even a single clue.

and if we extrapolate this data and think with common sense? you didn’t know either.

after a long day of school, you decided the best course of action was to just follow kenma home and hang out. it was a friday, and your family went out of town for the weekend, so you didn’t have to worry about returning home on time. besides, you’ve been hanging out forever, you knew no one would even bat an eye.

the two of you decided to play some video games to pass the time.

and that is how you ended up staying up until 7:37am.

one thing about kenma is that although he can easily get up at 2am to play, he has almost zero experience of staying up that long in at least 5 years. and coupled with the day before being an extra-long day — you had to write over 3 pages of notes for one class, had to run 5 laps for pe, and volleyball practice was extended until 5:30pm. he even woke up at 3am the night before to play on his console. he was rightfully more exhausted than usual.

kenma seemed to be weirder than usual to you now. he could barely keep his eyes open now, but neither could you, not after staying up for longer than 24 hours, so that definitely wasn’t it. was it the way he-

kenma placed his controller down and moved a bit closer to you, “wanna hug. can i hug you, (name)?”

you stared at him for a second. yeah, he was definitely acting strange, but he looked absolutely adorable in your opinion. his hands were outstretched, his eyes bleary and barely open, slightly furrowed brows, the tiniest hint of a pout on his cute, pink, kissable li- huh? no. where was your mind going to? you shook your head, “sure? i don’t really mind.”

“i’m happy you said you didn’t mind,” kenma muttered, nuzzling into your neck. “you always said you didn’t really like them so i was a bit worried you wouldn’t wanna.”

you awkwardly patted his back once, twice. this felt like a hallucination, what the heck was even happening? kenma never seemed to be the type to ask for hugs — usually, it was kuroo who was the one who asked for hugs. and you usually weren’t entirely comfortable with hugs, so why the hell did you say you “didn’t really mind”? and why was your cheek a little… warm? the ac was on full-blast, it doesn’t make sense! staying up for 24+ hours does some things to you.

beside you, kenma had stopped snuggling into your neck and moved a tiny bit farther, “hey hey (name)? is it alright if i… hold your face?” he noticed the puzzled look on your face, “it’s just that… your eyes look pretty, like super pretty. i wanna take a closer look. so can i?”

you tentatively nodded your head a little, still super confused. kenma’s face broke into a cute little smile as he shuffled closer to you and put his hands on your cheeks and pulled your face closer, his hands squishing your cheeks in the process. his hands felt incredibly cold against your warm, warm cheeks. you let out an involuntary shiver at the different temperatures.

“woahhh. so pretty, (name). your eyes look really pretty. i wanna keep looking at them forever,” he said, transfixed by your eyes.

you honestly thought your eyes weren’t all that special — you saw them daily so they kinda lost their appeal to you. maybe that was why you felt that feeling in your chest and stomach — fluttering, fluttering, fluttering like pretty little butterflies —, you never thought they looked pretty so maybe that’s why felt so flustered, your cheeks turning warmer, warmer, warmer? or maybe — you looked into kenma’s warm, excited eyes as he was squishing your cheeks and giggling and rambling about your “beautiful eyes” and how much he loved them — was it because it was him?

three months later, you still loved to tease him about that moment, watching his cheeks turn scarlet in an instant. but however embarrassing it was for him, he was glad it happened.

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awsugar · 2 years

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i recently started listening to franks solo music and really paying attention to lyrics, i was like ok he’s mad and hurt but maybe it’s his style idk, i don’t want to necessarily connect it to mcr maybe he has moved on after all this years, i don’t know.

Then… i found this alt press interview and just by reading, it so clear that frank’s resentment conveys directly towards the band and gerard and the fact that mcr for him was so important and powerful and the others didn’t see the potential he saw. I imagine this scene where g was like “frank come one it’s not that big of a deal if we break up, we aren’t the Beatles” and frank just going feral…. mmm what’s your opinion on franks words? thank you for reading anyway❤️🤧

OUGH yea ok. i remember reading that bit and it made me absolutely fucking insane, and i think at the time i definitely zeroed in on the part where he said he thinks theyre the best band in the world. but like reading it again im like ooooooouuuughghougohuguhgohh ugh. GOD.

and i mean just. what can i say. like we knew that the breakup wasnt really franks idea, based on the interview where he said it came as a surprise, and his own personal post about the breakup. i mean like he said he didnt want to beat a dead horse but he's the one that really wanted to fight to save it. and i think the others (particularly gerard) not really having the same fight left in them to save the band was really hurtful to him. and it had to be fucking WEIRD. like the fact that frank was brought into the band later and wasnt exactly a founding member, then being the one who believed in them the most and wanted to fight for it the most. but like. it does make sense, seeing as he was a fan first.

so like, ive talked on here before about how someone told me that frank was always the one that pushed for the reunion when they would get together. but i think that this makes that really really obvious. but also like now im thinking about frank bringing up the idea of a reunion when they would get together, or like just hinting at it. which is kind of sad bc they started brainstorming the reunion in 2017, right? which means i think he was probably bringing it up before then. and i mean in 2017 they had only been broken up 4 years, thats like no time at all, especially when a lot of bands break up forever. so like it seems kind of like frank was just letting them know the entire time, from like as soon as he stopped being extremely super hurt about the breakup in the first place, that he wanted to do it again. he never gave up on it.

and it does make you think that like. i mean ive theorized this whole time that franks accident was a catalyst for the reunion. and that kind of solidifies it even more. like i kind of think now that like ever since the breakup frank now and then would be like hey...i still havent given up on this....and then when they, especially gerard cause i think the togetherness and apartness of mcr mostly hinged on his decision, realized that they could actually lose him at any moment, lose the opportunity to do what frank had been pushing for, they realized ok maybe we do need to do this.

so anyway yea i mean i dont think all of franks music is about mcr breaking up. but its very clear that he has a LOT of feelings surrounding that i think they do make it into his music. and that passage you sent me literally lives in my mind rent free like. insane. we need to talk about this all the time.

#pansypositive #asks #im gonna make queue bend and break

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pinkpruneclodwolf · 2 years

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Good afternoon!!!! I have a new idea for a fic that I will crank out once I'm done w the second part of the prologue jhfksjfs also i just have been woken up from my nap and decided to choose violence so CRANKING THE ANGST TO THE MAX WE GOOOOOOO!!!! Okay but like in the world of twst people born w magic are born w cores in their bodies right??? and thats how they're able to manipulate magic AND properly articulate the magic in their body so that they don't die bc of it (its also why pens and magic gems are a thing so that the blot in their body so it doesn't result into them imploding bc of it) what if Yuu essentially bc they dont have a core and therefore their body cant regulate the magic and blot properly gets sick bc of it and gets filled w blot??? and just like a bottle thats full and overflowing w it---it leaks out thru them coughing or even puking blot???? in worst case scenarios even their tears and sweat and blood have been turned to blot (and slowly their whole body and mind would be too).

And the worst part is that its painful---bc blot not only brings out the worst of you and dials it to the max---its literal magic waste and is toxic as hell. Its like being dunked in poison or having needles crawl into your veins. Its not a pretty situation to be in---especially in the long run and with the amount of stressful situations Yuu has found themselves in---Its actually surprising that Yuu just didn't die with the amount of blot that's accumulated in their body.

Imagine in the worst case scenario Yuu is somewhere in ramshackle all alone bc they've driven everyone away from them (bc of fear and shame and self-loathing) and the blot overflowing from their body and cannot move bc of the sheer pain and numbness they feel bc of it. Imagine all the regret, pain, and anguish they feel in the moment and just the want to go apeshit and let it all out but be unable to because you're body isn't built for it so you're just stuck there dying and slowly rotting away until your feeling swallow you whole.

Anyways I might add on this later but for now I hope you have a nice day!!! :heart:

I actually believe historically that blot doesn't just affect Magicians.

There have been multiple theories that say that magic is an accumulative force (accumulating power, accumulating blot) or that it can have its own scientific classification up there with atoms, neutrons, protons, and electrons.

The idea of a magicless person OB isn't that far fetched when you consider those possibilities. For all we know Ortho could've been magicless and OB'ed due to an overexposure of magic (and subsequently blot)

It would then make sense that Yuu would accumulate blot (and subsequent magic, like Bruce getting the Hulk from gamma rays) bc they've essentially spent the whole year encountering magic with no outlet.

It was an oversight basically.

Yuu has been exposed to more magic than any magicless person, i say this bc 1: NRC is a magical school full of kids willing to blast magic at you with zero provocation (the Prologue, the Egg incident, etc) 2: There are rules and regulations for using magic in public, OB might not be common (Crowley said that OB are only once in a lifetime) laws and regulations would make sure it never happens bc phantoms do live on when the magician dies.

There are seemingly no rules in NRC aside from 'don't fight' but that doesn't include using magic—

What I'm saying is Yuu has been in countless situations where a magical murder mental breakdown was needed but hasn't happened yet i wouldn't be surprised if instead of Grim eating/absorbing Yuu, Yuu does an uno reverse card and absorbs Grim due to having accumulated more blot.

I think of Magicless people getting the symptoms of OB the same way as rabies—you think your fine (rabies can stay in the body for a couple days up to a whole ass year *looks at Yuu*) but in your last moments your rabid, in pain, feverish, and in that delirium Yuu would possibly push their friends away.

The core of a magician could be the heart, meaning that in place of blood, its blot. It would make sense that Yuu's body would slowly breakdown considering that blot is the toxic waste of magic one would need to be in the hospital for years trying to help the body relearn pumping blood even if it was just for a day.

Basically, Yuu either has to major plot armour or their body has adjusted to blot which opens a whole new can of worms.

#twisted wonderland #twst #twst theory #@hiraya manwari #scream into the void and i'll answer #i realize this is probably all over the place #i actually had a rapid fire theory about this

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whumpsday · 2 years

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OKAY OKAY WAIT HOLD ON. okay so kane wouldnt be starving, that is correct, but i feel like if seth wanted to force him to watch pumpkin be hurt, he would restrain him Very Well. w lots of silver. so he cant just lunge at him, but instead he has some time to calm down before he makes a horrible mistake! also i just like kane feeding on pumpkin A Lot, so im thinking of ways where he can do that but still be a little starved, and i just thought abt seth literally opening his throat up so the blood flows right out instead of in his tummy..... AND THAT WAY ITD BE A VALID CONCERN OF PUMPKIN'S THAT HE MIGHT GO OVERBOARD IN HIS DESPERATION TO GET SOME BLOOD PROPERLY INTO HIS SYSTEM......

as for the name, im gonna be honest im pretty sure seth would just call him leech. BUT CANDY KANE OMG JDKSKSKSK THATS SO GOOD IM CRYING. ADORABLE. but unfortunately seth wouldnt care enough abt his original name :( WAIT WAIT WAIT I CAN IMAGINE PUMPKIN COMING UP W THAT...... they would absolutely make sure to (very quietly bc fuck if seth heard them he might be rly angry) call him kane all the time so he doesnt feel like his name was taken from him :D i can also imagine pumpkin calling him sir accidentally.

also i have this image of pumpkin falling asleep on kane, or like, in his lap, and kane staying up to watch over them and make sure theyre okay and also make sure to avoid doing anything that could scare them so as not to shatter this new and fragile trust between them..... for some reason it makes me think of someone falling asleep in the embrace of a huge and venomous snake. yes it is safe bc no one would go near the snake. but the snake could also just tighten their body a bit and break bones and kill them :) it makes me cry a little to imagine kane being SO GENTLE w them. so so so gentle.

AND YES OMG PUMPKIN ABSOLUTELY WOULD TEACH HIM,,,, OLD MAN.... hehehehehe they would show him funny and cute pics all the time and let him read stories w them and maybe even let him send some asks- they would show him seth's blog and all the drabbles that were based on their torture w this weird sense of pride. they would hide the ones that were abt kane..... bc they wouldnt wanna make him sad :( or make him relive those :(

jsyk i have been rotating this crossover in my mind literally all day

ooooh seth is SMART.

before kane was with seth he was COMPLETELY starved with zero blood for years, so even with that horrific method, he would still feel grateful for being allowed to feed even a little bit. he would be very, very careful not to take too much.

kane would be touched by pumpkin making an effort to call him his real name, especially since kane hates being called leech and it makes him scared. pumpkin would have to explain what a candy kane is (kane doesn't know human foods) but he would think the nickname is sweet, coming from them. he would ask for their original name to return the gesture, which i assume pumpkin would decline.

pumpkin calling him sir would make him feel GUILTY AS HELL because it just reminds him of how cruel he was to jim. he might even refuse to feed for a day if pumpkin called him sir (assuming he is fed well-enough to not be super desperate, i assume he's like half-starved most of the time with seth)

YESSS PUMPKIN FALLING ASLEEP ON KANE IS SO CUTE.... he would try so so hard to be so so gentle. he's really, really trying to turn over a new leaf and he cares about pumpkin very much. they're his only friend.

kane would love being shown funny & cute pics and reading stories :) he would absolutely NOT be into whump though. he gets enough of that shit irl. he would want to read stuff as far removed as possible, for escapism. he would be kind of disturbed by how pumpkin is proud of the stories about seth torturing them, but he would try not to show it because he doesn't want to upset them. if kane sent asks he could sign with the 🧛 emoji :) i imagine this would be pumpkin's idea, lol

#ask #k&j ask #spk

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