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izvmimi · 9 months

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cw: minors dni. smut. reader with body image concerns.

izuku's hips slow to a rolling stop nearly the second you whimper, "c-can we turn the lights off?"

the words are eked out semi-breathlessly, but heard loud and clear, and the tight hold he has around your body loosens ever so slightly as he pulls his upper half from atop of you and leans back so that he can look at your face properly and figure out what prompted that sudden request. he's doing the opposite of what you want him to do right now - studying your lust-warmed face carefully as you catch your breath, a small pout on his lips. the way he looks at you now makes you feel a little too seen, rather far too seen, and your hands reflexively go to your eyes to cover them - not because you don't want to see him, all broad shoulders and perfect, unforgiving musculature, but because you don't want him to see you for the terribly plain being you are.

izuku's hands trace the length of your hips and cup your thighs gently, kneeling as he sits on his calves. he's still inside you, and the full sensation is manageable now even if it still makes you crazy; you can feel him twitch as he thinks, not ready to disconnect.

"yes, but why?"

you whisper something unintelligible under your breath, and he leans in, kissing your forehead, before he pulls your wrists away.

"mm?" he asks. he's smiling down at you, but you can sense a little bit of concern for your mental state, his fingers still running along your exposed skin to attempt to rub in some sense of comfort.

your lips move again, and he pulls one of your hands to his own lips to kiss the knuckles before prompting you to speak louder.

"speak up, my love."

something about the way he slips your thumb into his mouth and looks at you so lovingly, so full of desire specifically for you, overwhelms you and tears form in your eyes.

"i don't feel pretty," you finally cry.

izuku blinks as though he's in disbelief, but the message is clear, and he slips out of you just as quickly as your sobs start to come in for real, and he's got you in a secure embrace.

"but you are," he insists, and he's thumbing your trembling lower lip. you're embarrassed to say it out loud, that you don't see why he sees you the way he does, even if it's not your responsibility to deserve the way he loves you.

you shake your head, and he purses his lips, then kisses your eyelids.

"you're beautiful. you're perfect for me," he insist, but it's hard for you to hear it. all you can remind yourself of is every irregularity to your skin, the way your body falls short to models and other heroes, and everyone else he would be barely off looking at.

he pulls you close and lets you rest in his embrace. a few moments pass, and he strokes your hair and listens to everything that you feel is wrong with you, and even though it hurts him, he lets you say whatever you need to say before denying it.

kisses pepper your skin and deny your imperfections; you let him wind you up more, whispering your beauty into every curve of your body until you start to believe it, until you'll accept him again.

"let me look at you," he pleads, and you nod, letting him intertwine his fingers with yours. the tears are back but they're happy now, thankful, as he fucks you deep, your legs rested on his head, trying to reach the deepest, darkest parts of you.

because you are the prettiest and your beauty is so plain to see.

#izuku x reader #izuku midoriya x reader #izuku smut #izuku midoriya smut #thoughts: izuku #daydreams: bnha #mimi's notes

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delfiore · 11 months

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—DO NOT GO GENTLE INTO THAT GOOD NIGHT. (2/3)

pairing: natasha romanoff x android!reader

synopsis: a face-to-face with caesar confirms what you are already too afraid to admit, as your days as the mole are numbered.

word count: 2.1k

PART I, PART III

Caesar’s new command kept you on edge, you barely had time to do anything else. It was in your program to obey the instructions you were given, so even if you didn’t want to, your brain—CPU—was calculating the best possible way to kill Natasha. You thought about poisoning her, stabbing her in her sleep, pushing her off a ledge to make it look like an accident. The thought of killing Nat was horrifying, but it was even more horrifying to know that you were perfectly capable of doing it, or that you would not be able to stop yourself once the command has been entered.

You wiped the tears that had been running freely down your cheeks. Looking in the mirror, you saw no flaw, no imperfection, just a hollow shell of your face model staring back at you. You wondered whether whomever your face was modeled after lived a normal life, if they knew of your existence, or were they just trying to get home after a long week of work.

“Baby?”

“Huh?”

“Ibuprofen,” Nat called from the bedroom, “could you grab it from the cabinet, please?”

The last mission she went on left her with a dislocated shoulder. It had since been reset, but she needed painkillers to help with the ache.

“Uh, yeah,” you sniffled and grabbed what she needed. When you returned to the bedroom, she was already looking at you with furrowed eyebrows.

She was silent when you handed her the pill bottle, and when you climbed into bed wordlessly.

“Y/N, I didn’t wanna say anything because I wanted you to feel ready to talk to me about whatever it is, but I’m worried, my love.”

You let out a slow breath, and mustered up the best smile you were able to.

“I’m okay. It’s just, work has been a bit stressful.”

“Really? Has Tony been overworking you? I can tell him to—“

“No, no, Nat, please,” you exhaled sharply, “just let it go. Please.”

A beat of silence passed and you thought she might have decided to drop it when she said. “You’re hurting, and I don’t know how to help you. It hurts me to see you like this.”

You felt the guilt gnawing at the back of your throat, threatening to spill out of your mouth. It was a surprising thing to learn that you could feel guilt (you have been feeling it a lot lately). Caesar must have installed it to make you second-guess disobeying him; another failsafe in case you desert.

“I don’t know if I’m deserving of all this, Nat.”

“What do you mean?”

“This, being Tony’s assistant, this life here, you.” You cried quietly. “I don’t know i-if I deserve all this.”

“Of course you do,” Natasha cooed. She probably thought you were going insane.

Natasha was never one for words, and the repeated opening and closing of her mouth was enough to tell you that she didn’t know what to say. She brought you into her arms, and let you cry quietly against her chest.

You never let her see you cry. There was an unspoken shame that you felt whenever you felt the tears coming, like you didn’t deserve to cry, like it was a privilege reserved only for those with real emotions. But if what you were feeling then, that warm sensation spread across your chest, the safeness of being enveloped in Nat’s embrace as she whispered repeated I love you’s in your ears, if that wasn’t real, nothing else on Earth was. Everything would cease to exist, and life would have no meaning.

Maybe that way you would finally deserve her.

You would learn later that Caesar had managed to get on the Avengers’ radar. It wasn’t hard to tell why; VULCAN is one of the only organizations in the world that manufactured artificial intelligence smart enough to blend into society without compromise.

“Jeez,” Clint laughed, “wonder how many of those are walking around Time Square right now.”

“If I had to guess, it'd be a lot." Tony opened a computer screen. "Which is why I've installed scanners in our metal detectors, looking for abnormally high levels of iron in a body. Could be an indication of synthetic blood. Everyone coming into the Compound will be scanned.”

“People with heart diseases and diabetes could also have high levels of iron,” Vision chimed in.

“Sounds like our accuracy could be off,” Sam noted.

“We don’t know what we’re dealing with yet, or how human-like these things are. This is our best bet right now,” Tony shook his head.

“One thing for sure, though,” Nat said, “we have to find who’s behind this. And when we do, we have to shut those androids down to prevent a national security risk.”

You weren’t in the room when the conversation happened, but you were able to hack into F.R.I.D.A.Y’s memory drive to access the recording of the meeting anyway. You needed to know what they said, even when hearing what Nat suggested broke your heart.

It is believed that the sense of smell is closely tied to memory. It is because the olfactory bulb is directly connected to the hippocampus, the section of the limbic system that processes and stores memory. You remembered the smell of the Factory as soon as you set foot in it. It was your first ever memory since before you opened your eyes; it was a sterilized, and clean smell, too much as if to hide another smell. But once you got to Caesar’s office, though, it was replaced by a softer smell of wood, and lavender.

“FD700-16.” He smiled and beckoned you over to embrace you.

“Hello, Caesar.” You let him wrap his arms around you. “I do believe this is the first time we’ve met.”

Caesar was a man of tall stature, even for his age. Lines like rivers adorned his face, and he sported a mid-length head of grey hair. There was a glint in his blue eyes that you couldn't quite decipher; at first glance, he looked like a gentle older man. You tried to scan your database for his identity, because there was no way his real name was Caesar, but your records were blank.

“But oh, is it? I’ve always been here, even before you were born.” Caesar smiled, a wicked grin. “I’ve always been there, watching over you. You were always meant for greatness, there’s no denying that.”

You swallowed a lump in your throat. “About my new objective—“

“Ah, come, we’ll talk about that later. Come, sit. You are the best model I have created so far.”

“I’ve learned a lot, sire.” You said with a small smile. “Your program has allowed me to learn things, experience emotions. I feel . . . almost human.”

“What have you learned of the files, 16?” You could tell he was growing impatient. “The one you were tasked with retrieving?”

You blinked a few times, surprised he had brushed off your comments so easily. “I’m working on it, sire.”

Caesar let out a low sigh. “Do you know why I started VULCAN? At this point, I had worked for the CIA for years. Espionage was what I excelled at, but I’ve seen how emotion clouded many of my colleague’s judgments. But I couldn’t blame them; our intellect is humanity’s greatest gift, but also our biggest downfall. And in my line of work, it could get you killed, or worse, jeopardize the mission.

I know what you’re thinking, 16. How could jeopardizing a mission be worse than dying? When you believe in something, really believe in something, it becomes bigger than you. It affects everyone involved in it, it’s not just you anymore. That is how humans have become the apex predator; we work as one.”

You took a moment to digest everything Caesar told you. It wasn’t how you saw it, but surprisingly it made sense. “So you founded VULCAN to . . . eliminate human error?”

“Now you’re getting it,” he smiled, but it looked more like a grin, him baring his teeth. “The Red Room had the same idea, but slightly flawed as it relied on human assassins. I want to take that formula and modify it, make it perfect.”

“Perfect,” you mumbled, looking up at him. “Is that what you intended for me?”

Caesar leaned back against his chair. “Perfection is never what we are, 16, but who we have the potential to be.”

You had been in the lab for hours by the time you decided to check the time. You had been working on the same model for a few days, just like Tony wanted you to; a new algorithm to deploy his rockets faster, one that he can do so manually should F.R.I.D.A.Y. had been disconnected from taking damage—a failsafe of a sort. Instead of him having to push a button or speak a command, it would run the program using the synapses in his brain as the command.

You thought you’d do your job properly, as you wouldn’t have a job tomorrow if tonight goes accordingly.

It felt easy listening to Caesar, to heed his command. It went against your program to pretend to live in this fantasy you had with Natasha, that would never come to be anyway.

Happy endings are for humans, not androids.

Caesar was right, and he was all along. He was your maker after all.

Natasha came by to pick you up. You were supposed to go to the rooftop for a picnic with her. After that you’d go back to her room and watch a movie before calling it night, except there would be no movie because by the time you leave the rooftop, Natasha would have been dead.

You had opted for an odorless and tasteless poison that would put her to sleep first so that she wouldn’t feel anything; it would simply cause her heart to go into arrhythmia and stop beating.

Nat brought you flowers when she came into the lab.

New York at night was no less beautiful than a meadow at night; the light of the city resembled a field of fireflies in the dark of the sky. Natasha made sandwiches to share between you, you prepared some strawberries, grapes, and cheese, much easier to slip the poison into—fluid mixing with the juices of the fruit.

You brought a small lantern to light up the space where you would set up your date; it seemed almost beautiful and peaceful.

She gave you a kiss as soon as she sat down. “I love this, babe.”

You flashed a smile back. “Only the best for my best girl.”

There was a hint of a blush on her rosy cheeks. Please don’t eat the strawberries.

“Yelena says she’ll be in town next week, says she misses you. Almost like she only came to visit you.” Nat smiled with a roll of her eyes. “She mentioned something about wanting to go to an art museum. Maybe you guys should go to the Met together.”

“I’d like that,” you said, watching the way she put her chin on her fold knee. “How long is she staying?”

“A week, but she always overstays her welcome anyway.”

“Nat?”

“Hm?”

“Don’t eat the strawberries.”

“Hm? Why?”

“Cause they’re kinda going bad,” you grimaced. “I’m sorry, I was in the lab all day. Forgot to go pick up fresh ones.”

“Really? We bought these like two days ago.”

“Well, they are from Trader Joe’s.”

Your skin jumped when she picked up the fruit, bringing it up to smell it, before taking a small nibble from it.

“You didn’t think it’d be that easy, would you?”

“What?” You blinked.

She spat out the piece she had in her mouth, and set the strawberry down.

“How did you know?” You sighed.

“When you stopped using the main entrance to the Compound, and only used the entrance from the living quarters.” Natasha clenched her jaw. “I should have guessed sooner, but I guess I was too afraid to admit it.”

The loud bang of the door blowing off its hinges left you completely on edge. FBI agents shouting with their guns pointed at you, and soon enough you were entirely surrounded.

Your eyes filled with tears as you looked back at Nat, seeing her without emotion. But you knew her; she was trying really hard.

“I’m sorry, for everything,” you said before deploying a smoke bomb and jumping off the building to your escape.

Natasha sat, slumped on the picnic cloth still with food and her affection spread out. “I know,” she whispered, hoping the night’s wind would carry her words to you.

PART I, PART III

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff imagines #natasha romanoff angst #natasha romanoff x you #black widow x reader #natasha x reader #natasha imagine

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igotanidea · 1 year

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I won't hurt you : Dick Grayson x f!reader

Warning: well, this gif was not chosen by accident, duh, SMUT, insecurities, MINORS DNI!

Being intimate with someone was always hard to imagine for me. Ok, I may have been deeply in love with Dick Grayson but the thought of him making love to me was just too much. I mean, he was the Nightwing. Flawlessly looking, perfectly sculptured, all muscles and trained and toned figure. Me? Not so much. Most of the times when I looked inn the mirror it was like a prick of conscience that I’m not doing more to look better. That my body was far from good looking. All those imperfections, insecurities and my internal critic screaming at me that I don’t deserve him. I might have been a good person inside but my outside was making me feel terrible. Not to mention that one too many times I’ve heard (and that coming from the people who were my closest family, apparently) that I was fat and waste of space. I used to shrug it off casually not letting anyone show how much it hurt, but the truth was that it did. One of the worst feeling ever – trusting someone enough to show that vulnerable side that was later on used against you, just to cause pain and make you feel this sharp pain inside. So, with such experiences it was always hard for me to let people in. Both emotionally and especially physically.

I knew Dick loved me, I did. But knowing was something far different from letting him see me whole. All that parts I hated, which pretty much was all of them. What if he gets disgusted? What if he change the way he see me? God! All those thoughts were just spinning inside my mind. It was harder than I expected.

So when the time came, after a lot of convincing it was time for us to get intimate.

“YN” he said lightly stepping forward and pulling me close.

I couldn’t even look him straight into the eyes, my heart beating so loud I couldn’t breathe properly. My eyes were everywhere but on him.

“Baby, look at me” he spoke softly but I just shook my head, clenching my fist unwillingly and closing eyes. That was when I felt his lips on my forehead, his hands starting to caress my back softly, slowly, trying his best to help me relax in his arms. But the more he tried to give me comfort and support the more I started to shake and quiver. “I am not going to hurt you” he whispered, his mouth now hovering over mine, mere centimeters apart and that finally made me open my eyes and look at him. There were just pure love and concern and softness on his face, quite a rare view, given his alter ego and night works. “I love you” he added.

“I know” I gasped and much to my embarrassment started crying. “I’m sorry….” I panted trying my best to stop the tears from falling “I just…. I don’t think I know how to be loved …..” I clenched my fist even more since that was what I used to do to keep myself strong.

“Don’t” he took my hands in his making me unclench them, preventing me from hurting the palms with the fingernails. Holding me close to his chest to the point where I was hiding my face in his shirt making it wet but he just didn’t care, stroking my hair gently. “It’s ok. Everything is all right. We can wait. I can wait. I won’t push you to do anything, I swear.”

Why was it so hard? I felt so safe in his embrace like he was the one who could shield me from the entire world, protect me from whatever danger might be coming so why couldn’t I let my guards down and just let him love me?! What was wrong with me?! Any other girl at my place would just jump into his arms without hesitation. Any other girl would fall straight to her knees in front of him. Fuck, there were a line of them, waiting to get into his bed. And I was just a freaking out because he was about to love me.

“Dick, I am so sorry.” I repeated “It’s not ok, not at all. You are so good to me and I’m just…..I don’t know. You can have any girl you want and I’m…..

“Stop it. I don’t want any other girl I just want you. you hear me? Only you.” he grabbed my chin and made me look at him, opening his mouth to say something more but seeing the look in his eyes I just decided to stop thinking. Before he could say anything I leaned into him, connecting our lips. This kiss was sloppy and shy. At first. Of course it was not the first time we were making out but this was different, knowing where we were heading. Acting so out of character I gave up the control leaving the driving to him and he was more than willing to take the wheel as he started to deepen the kiss making it more heated, more passionate and faster. Almost like he wanted to take all the bad thoughts and fears rooted so deep inside me. Before I realized what was happening he lifted me up, wrapping my legs around his hips making me feel how hard he already was and I squeaked with both surprise and sudden fright. This was really happening.

“Is everything ok?” He pulled back immediately eyeing me with so much care.

“Yes. Yes. Don’t stop. Don’t make me think” I pulled him back to me by his neck and connected our lips again. I had no idea what I was doing but one think I was sure that the second I let my thinking consume me again my mental barrier will reappear as well. The only way was to take a leap of faith. Good thing Dick was more experienced on the field. He knew exactly what and how to do.

“I won’t.” he gasped as his mouth moved to my neck, gently sucking on the skin, sending shivers down my spine. “I will make you feel good. I promise.” Oh, he already was, slowly walking backwards towards the bedroom with my legs still wrapped around him, so I was hanging onto him like a koala. When we reached the edge of the bed he sat down with me on his lap, his nimble fingers playing with the hem of my shirt. “May I?” he murmured against my skin and almost hypnotized by all his actions I nodded letting him expose me. “You are perfect” he repeated as more and more skin were showing. Next, still kissing me, he took my hands in his guiding them to unbutton his shirt and slowly, oh so slowly slid it down his strong toned arms, leaving his perfect abs exposed. I was now so hot, pretty sure I was blushing like crazy “You are so perfect” he said once again, lips on mine, as my hands on their own volition started wondering around his chest and neck, feeling his pulse rising. “I want you YN. Will you let me love you like you deserve? Please, be mine…..” Dick leaned his forehead on mine and I nodded again. “I need you to say it out loud……”

“Yes. Just please don’t …..”

“I won’t hurt you. Just say a word and I stop. It’s ok, it’s all ok….” He gently laid me down, not breaking the kiss, his hands moving down my sides, settling on my waist and I shuddered again feeling the warmth coming from his body.

“Dick…..” I moaned, being so embarrassed with myself, he did barely anything and I was already a mess.

“I am here. I love you. Everything is all right. You are so perfect, so good…. We don’t have to rush. Just tell me what you want…..” he whispered, being as vocal as usual, just way more horny.

“You. I want you, Dick. I love you too….. ” I was still so scared, but slowly with every touch of his hands and lips he was making it go away. “I’m sorry. I’m so pathetic….” I covered my face with hands. A whiny and needy girl was surely nothing he wanted.

“You are wonderful” he grabbed my hands making me look straight at him. “don’t hide from me. I love seeing you coming apart already. All mine, all for me.” His eyes darkened with lust and I felt my insides clenching for him and my pussy throbbing and out of instinct I hooked my arms around his neck pulling him closer. At the time his hands slid around my back unclasping my bra and slowly massaging my bare breast making me moan into the kiss as he smiled.

“God. I’m so crazy for you” his lips replaced hands as he sucked on my nipples sending another wave of pleasure all over me. I arched my back turning into pure want and need.

“Dick….” I moaned feeling him playing with the zipper of my pants “don’t tease…..”

“Are you sure?” how was it possible for him to stay so in control while I was just overwhelmed with the sensations he was giving me.

“Yes, please.” I gasped as he slid the pants and underwear alongside my legs and pressing our bodies even closer together, skin to skin. “Fuck!” now I felt his hardness against my bare femininity. All but him forgotten, feeling nothing but his body against mine, his hands and lips on every inch of me. Brain off. Mental shutdown. All of a sudden everything seemed so natural, so beautiful. He was here, he wanted me, he didn’t think I was flawed or broken. And I wanted him too. All of him. Despite that little alarm that went on in my head as the unbuttoned his own jeans and his cock sprung out hard, swollen and ready, I pushed my thoughts away.

“Focus on me.” He breathed out, hovering over me, intertwining our fingers, completely overwhelmed by hunger of me “are you ready, baby?”

“Yes. Please. Make me yours. Just…. go slow.”

He smirked and complying with my request carefully started to enter me. It was only the tip of his member but as he was stretching me and pushing against my hymen I squirmed beneath him.

“How are you feeling?” he asked, so mindful of my own mental state

“Good. Weird, but so, so good.”

“Do you need some time to….”

“No. No” I shook my head “give me more, please, please….”

He smiled like crazy and pushed some more. I felt the resistance coming from my body, unwilling to let him inside and dug my nails into his shoulders making him stop at the spot.

“You good, babe?”

“Yes. Yes, I just need a second” I slightly moved my hips to adjust “now, you can move and …. Ah!” as he pushed past my cherry this new feeling just consumed me whole making me arch my back, and throw my head further into the pillows.

“Let me in.” he muttered lips ghosting over mine, bodies pressed together and at this point I had no idea where I ended and he begun. “That’s it, babe. You feel so good. You are all mine. All mine….” He was repeating this word like a broken record, but it was just so hot and emotional I was just melting completely.

Due to my surprise within seconds he was just all in and went still, silently asking me for permission to move and as I granted it, started rocking his hips, at first carefully, gently but slowly picking up the pace, holding me so, so close to his, our bodies becoming one.

“Dick,….” I moaned “don’t…. stop….. feels so good.….. I’m gonna… I’m gonna…..” my words were now an incoherent blabbing, I wasn’t able to form proper sentence.

“Good, babe. Let it go. Cum for me…. I want to see you fall apart for me. Only for me….” He was desperately chasing his own high, but we both knew he wouldn’t let himself finish before me. “I love you so fucking much, my girl, my baby….”

I don’t know if it was the words or just one final snap of his hips but soon I felt my own orgasm overwhelm me, sending me over the edge, as Dick walked me right through it. It was exhilarating, knowing he was the one to make me feel this way, that he was the one to be next to me during this first time. He soon followed me with his own high gasping and panting in pleasure.

“Shit, babe. You feel so good, so perfect….” He finished and crashed me with his body falling down. He was heavy but at the same time I felt complete with his bodyweight on mine, my hands immediately embracing him as I needed something to hold on to and to ground myself. After a while however I was not able to breathe anymore and gently tapped his shoulder urging him to move up.

“I love having you like this bird boy, but you need to move. You are hurting me now…” I whispered playing with his chiseled hair and the word “hurt” made him start up.

“I’m so sorry, baby. Please forgive me, I got so lost in you….” he turned onto the side eyes fixed on mine with so much love, care and affection as he intertwined our fingers..

“ Don’t be sorry, Dick. You just gave me something I never thought possible. You walked right past my inhibitions. Thank you.” I smiled at him, exhausted but happy.

“I’m glad. “ he muttered pulling me in, my head resting on his chest listening to his calming heartbeat “I told you I won’t hurt you. I love you so much YN.”

“I love you too, boy wonder” I mumbled, slowly drifting off from all the overwhelm.

“Get some rest. I will be right here when you wake up, not going anywhere…..”

“What about the crime that doesn’t sleep?” I chuckled on the verge of sleep.

“Jason and the rest will take care of it tonight. I just need, no want to have you in my arms. I’m not leaving.

And that was a promise he kept, making me feel safe, loved, wanted and satisfied. Glad that my first time was with him.

@pinksirensong - I;m sorry I;m putting you through this......

btw I've just realised I forgot to tag you in a cuple of my latest updates <sorrry>

masterlist

#dc #dc imagine #dick grayson x reader #dick grayson imagine #nightwing x reader #nightwing x oc #dick grayson x you #nightwing x you #dick grayson #nightwing #dc titans #dc titans x reader #dick grayson fanfiction #dick grayson x y/n #nightwing x y/n #nightwing imagine #nightwing fanfiction

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yanderes-galore · 1 year

Note

Hi you're an amazing writer may I request white diamond x pearl reader? 💖

Well, this can only ever go one way, I hope you like my take though ^^

Yandere! White Diamond with Pearl! Darling

Pre-Era 3

Short Concept

Pairing: Romantic/Platonic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Manipulation, Brainwashing, Moral conflict, Obsession, Implied jealousy, Social structures.

Well, we’ve all seen what she did with Pink’s first pearl, right?

Pearls are meant to be servants in the caste system of Gem culture.

You don’t really have much of a say who gets to keep you on Homeworld.

If White feels she wants you as hers for whatever reason, she can have you.

Who are you to refuse?

White’s the diamond most in power, while you’re just a regular old pearl.

If she did have a pearl darling, to keep things interesting she wouldn’t use her powers on you at first.

She starts really calm and patient with you, when she first has you under her rule she just treats you like any old diamond.

Honestly, with the eerie demeanor of the pearl she already had under her, you’d probably already wish to do all you can to keep her happy.

There’s… just something odd about her.

The room you spend most of your time in is filled with monotone colors, a blinding white everywhere you look.

It’s also the way she talks that’s just so strange.

You know your place and don’t question it but it does creep you out.

Even more so when the first few encounters you had with her were through Pink’s old pearl.

It isn’t until later on in her obsession does she eventually summon you to her ship.

She’d be the type to try and make sure the little attachment she has for you is perfect.

Again, love is a strange concept for Gems in their culture, it isn’t often expressed.

Much less between a lowly pearl and a regal diamond.

You’re so confused and scared when THE White Diamond starts wanting you to listen to her for orders.

You!?

What did YOU do!?

White normally is really reclusive, rarely talking to anyone now after the whole Pink incident before Era 3.

White would try her best to be patient with you at first, wanting you to be perfect for her without having to remove what makes you yourself.

Your behavior makes her feel imperfect, how your personality draws her to you makes her scared.

Her obsession would worry her as she is supposed to be perfect for her people.

Her strange affections towards you makes her feel different, she both hates it but is curious about it.

This is why she wants to keep you, treasure you like a pearl of her own.

She doesn’t want you to end up like Pink’s pearl due to her power, yet…

Unfortunately such a fate is inevitable before Era 3 as a pearl.

Her obsession makes the diamond so conflicted to the point she feels she has to rid herself of it.

She doesn’t want to get rid of you, however.

She can embrace this feeling in a different way.

She doesn’t have to change, she just needs to make you obedient and perfect.

Once you're perfect, then this little connection between you will finally feel right.

It’s upsetting when you lose all your color, going monotone and under her command.

You lose your individuality and become a puppet for her to keep.

One that listens to her every command, at this point you’re part of her now.

She feels this way she will stay perfect while keeping you, the pearl of her affections.

She feels good about the fact she now has you to herself, that you’re now a part of her perfect fantasy.

While it would’ve been nice to keep your unique color and behavior, it was too much for her.

She wanted to keep you, but not as you.

While her obsession feels a bit more dull now… she feels relieved and happy it’s all over with.

She has nothing to worry about if you’re just like her and under her control.

#yandere steven universe #yandere white diamond

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pandoa · 2 years

Note

May irequest for your flower event

Asters ~ “i am willing to wait. i will remain by your side, loyal only to you”

And

Cherry blossoms ~ “your imperfections are what make you simply irresistible”

For azul but his s/o is saying this

Asters ~ “i am willing to wait. i will remain by your side, loyal only to you”

Cherry blossoms ~ “your imperfections are what make you simply irresistible”

~azul ashengrotto x gender neutral reader~ warnings: angst/comfort for our dearest octo boy <3 azul and the reader are also in an established relationship

hello anon! i just wanted to say that i absolutely loved writing this. azul deserves all the comfort he can get and i'm so glad that i was able to write for this side of him. enjoy!

♡Blossom Grove Prompt Event♡

♡know that i am here♡

It was one of those dreary days where the sun refused to emerge from the curtains of gloomy clouds in the overcast sky. The atmosphere was filled with a sweltering dampness that irritated your skin as the wind softly whispered its darkest secrets into your itching ears. Raindrops pattered against the windows with an uneven rhythm. Thunder roared and rumbled through the ground. No one wished to remain out in these unpleasant conditions, and you and Azul were no exception.

Maybe it was the colorless way the trees hung low over the creaking roof of your room at Ramshackle. Perhaps it was the howling shouts of the storm creating a crestfallen mood on all who encountered it. Or it mayhaps could have been the dreadful emptiness surrounding the usually lively Night Raven campus. Whatever it had been, all you were certain of was that it left your dear boyfriend, Azul, to be distraught by his occasional waves of insecurity.

Huddled underneath a sound blanket in your rather cozy dorm room, Azul turned his face away from yours, clearly trying to prevent you from spotting the flowing tears welling up from his eyes. It was moments like this where he wished your gentle gaze would divert its attention to anything that was not himself. He detested the feeling of your worried stares pointed towards him and loathed the fact that you had to see him in such a frazzled state.

“I’m afraid you do not understand,” Azul said as he buried himself in the warm covers of your bed. “I am weak, I am ugly. I may appear to be worthy now; however, deep down I know that I will always remain as the pathetic little merman trapped inside a silly octopus pot like the crybaby I truly am.”

Extending your hand out to cradle his contrastingly cold palm, you grasped Azul’s figure, determination evident in your demeanor. “Azul, look at me. You know none of that matters.” You proclaimed assertively as you peered into your boyfriend’s fallen expression, making sure to maintain an intimate eye contact with the young man. “I love you.”

“How could you love a miserable thing like me?”

“Well, first off,” you began as you placed a concentrating finger against your chin, “you are incredibly intelligent. Look at all the accomplishments your younger self has achieved. Your brilliant mind never ceases to amaze me.”

Azul then peeked his head out from the soft disposition of your blankets at the validating reassurance of your words. Did you really think that? A small part of him wished for you to continue, filling him with a certain sense of warmth gathering within his stomach.

“And your octopus form? All the more arms for you to wrap around my waist in a snuggly embrace,” you whispered into the light-gray locks of the fragile second year before you, caressing each troubling thought that infected Azul’s mind with your own sweet sentences.

“The tears you shed only prove that you are comfortable enough to let yourself be free around me. Do you know just how much pride I get from knowing that you allow yourself to lower your guard around me for the sole reason being that you trust me?” you asked with genuine fondness weaved into your heartwarming voice.

“Your imperfections are what make you simply irresistible. Please do not think that there is a need for you to hide them.”

Azul, who had finally emerged from his place burrowed in your bed, lifted his wavering gaze to your knowing one as he relaxed. “I will try… I suppose. However, there are no promises that I’ll expose them right away. I must have time.”

“Of course. Take all the time that you need. I am willing to wait. I will remain by your side, loyal only to you.”

Running an emollient hand through Azul’s hair, you pulled his form closer to yours in a long overdue embrace that left the Octavinelle housewarden yearning for more of your delicate touches of affection. The emotions you evoked out of Azul seeped out of the boy in an uncharacteristic manner regardless of whether he wanted them to or not. Feelings of a swelling passion growing in his heart, feelings of overwhelming courage in his step, and finally, feelings of weakness that was not necessarily a bad thing when only shown to you, his lover.

Vulnerability.

a/n: woooooo two azul requests in a row lol

#twisted wonderland #disney twisted wonderland #twst #disney twst #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #twst imagines #twst scenarios #azul ashengrotto #twst azul #azul ashengrotto x reader #azul twisted wonderland #azul twst #azul x reader #azul ashengrotto x y/n #octavinelle #gender neutral reader #blossom grove prompt event #twst angst

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hoshi-y · 1 year

Note

🍇

Your blog is a Godsend honestly😭😭 The writing the TBHK Fandom gets is so little compared to other Fandom and yours is some of the best in my opinion!

I was wondering if I could have letters A, B, C, E, J, K, L, S and W for Hanako or Amane pls?

Don't rush to finish it tho, take your time! Have a nice day/night <3

Fluff Alphabet | Amane Y.

A/N : WOWSHWUHS OH MY GOD YOU THINK SO? I am very flustered HWHSHSHA my purpose here on tumblr was to share my piled up story ideas, headcanons or even one shots, and it still surprises me how far I've come now that I am looking and writing other peoples amazing ideas, LOOKING TO WRITE FOR MORE HEHE

The person who I was following their prompt for I cant open their prompt list, so I searched some up and wrote what I could remember 💔

I HOPE YOU ENJOY 💗

A, B, C, E, J, K, L, S, W

A - Affection. "How do they show affection?"

Oh good golly where do I even start? Amane would show you affection in EVERY possible way, simple hugs, kisses, spending time with you, doing things you love, even the smallest things he does to show you affection absolutely makes you blush. But his most favorite way to show affection to you is through hugs and words. He loves to pull you into a long hug and whisper sweet nothings into your ear as he smirks at your blushing face

Some are even perverted topics—

B-Beauty. "What do they find most attractive?"

Amane can NEVER pick out which part of you he finds attractive

You were absolutely perfect in his eyes, and he loves you so much to notice any imperfections with you.

every part of you he finds attractive

C-Comfort. "How do they help you when you feel sad?"

Amane is a guy who'd comfort you with words, and long tights hugs. He'd whisper sweet things into your ear while he brushes your hair and kiss away all your salty tears.

When you're feeling dowm, he'd know right away, he'd stop whatever he is doing or drop everything he's gonna do, cancel plans, etc. He would immediately pull you into a tight but comforting embrace and sit you down as he comforts you, he won't push you to say what or who is bothering you. He just wants to put that bright and cheerful smile on your face once again.

E-Equal "Are they the dominant one in the relationship?

Come on this is Yugi Amane we're talking about. There are times he wants ti be the dominant one in the relationship (not in a toxic way) but there are times he'd let you become the dominant one (bottom??)

J-Jealousy "Do they get jealous easily?"

He can handle his jealousy, but only for a little while before he snaps and hugs your waist fr9m behind as he rest his chin on your shoulder glaring at the person who you have all your attention to and not him

K-Kisses "Are they a good kisser?"

He is an AMAZING kisser, come on you can't tell me he doesn't have experience with the amount of books or 'magazines' he reads, he'd give you those short kisses, long, french (oh my), passionate kisses, they are so addictive you wouldn't last a day without it

L-Love "How did they confess to their s/o?"

Although Amane is very cheerful and outgoing, he has a shy side of him, the way he confessed to you was by leaving anonymous notes on your desk or in your shoe locker.

He doesn't want people intervening nor watching, he wants this confession to be you and him only, so he confessed during a school festival on the rooftop while both of you were stargazing, he made cheesy remarks at first but then pops the question <3

He was very nervous that you'd reject him, but now he doesn't need to worry now that you're his

S-Support "Do they support their s/o's to achieve their goals?"

Amane would ALWAYS support you, with whichever decisions you make.

If you tell him about a goal that you're trying to achieve, he won't make fun at you, make remarks nor comment, he'd offer to help so that you can achieve that goal

W-Wild card "Random fluff headcanon"

There was a time you saw he was hiding his pen with a moon keychain on it in his bag, you made a comment on how cute it was and that made him happy, the next day he had it on his shirt pocket everyday ever since that comment he'd put it out for you to see, he'd even buy you the star one so you and him could match 😭💗

IM SLEEPY GOODNIGHT WORLD

#toilet bound hanako kun #jibaku shoujo hanako kun #tbhk x reader #jshk #tbhk #hanako kun #tbhk hanako #yugi amane #tbhk amane #amane x reader

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hools · 7 months

Note

i love ur zine work && am rlly interested in making one myself! i’m curious how you go about creating yours, specifically are they “storyboarded”/pre-written at all or do you just start with an idea & draw n write from there directly on the zine?

hey thank you so much [-:

ive only made 2 of them ever so take this as you will LOL. i drew them both directly onto paper with a ballpen without any sketching since id been itching to physically make somthing for once. i did have a scrap piece of paper/sticky notes on hand in case i messed up & for NETHING NETHING i thought it fit very well.

& yeah with both of them i just started with a broad idea of what i want to express & a name that fits. i began both of them with the cover page because i found that was an easy &fun jumping off point (& a place to ground the ideas in).

i let the theme flow however it wanted to pretty much. i didn't plan any page past like the next one or two. Horror Vacui was fun because i was working with a marker that bled thru the construction paper i was using, so a lot of the page layouts were made to fit whatever ended up on the other side. would recommend.

i didn't have an ending in mind til the last few pages either, but its probably a good idea to know on what note you want to both start & end on. but u can also do anything. which is what i had fun doing.

if you know you like planning out everything then you should follow ur heart & plan out everything. have fun. alternatively you can improvise everything if you want to try something new. im not sure if i should say it's an inherently imperfect medium, but messing up and finding ways to embrace (or bury) your fuckups can be part of the fun. & it was for me. if it really doesn't work out you can always tear it up throw it away delete the file or something. but u gotta start another one. for me

#asks #kezyne #go make a little zine!

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evangelinesbible · 1 year

Text

ENERGY IM BRINGING INTO 2023

More positive self talk

I've gotten better at being kinder to myself but I still have a long way to go. I'm trying not to nit pick at myself too much and I want to embrace my imperfections more this year. I also want to embrace the parts of me I can't change and try to look at life in a more positive/optimistic light

Embracing myself and being confident in my self expression

I'm confident in a way but not fully. I want to take more pictures of myself this year and build a portfolio. I want embrace not just front camera me but back camera as well. I want to feel like the bad bitch everyone claims I am. Last year I started to buy clothes that I actually liked and this year I want to build my own style. I want to feel free and unapologetic in how I express myself

Holding myself accountable and taking control of my future

I turned 18 last year and I realized that my future was always in my hands. no one was going to pop up out of no wear and give me everything I've ever wanted. I want to work for it, build to it and hold myself accountable. I want to train my body, voice, and performance abilities. I want to be a BEAST in what I do. I want to go after whatever I want confidently this year. I have more responsibilities now and I need to be on top of my shit and maintain balance in my life, which means that I have to sacrifice the things I want to do and the the stuff I have to do.

Gaining the courage to put out my creative work

Every year I tell myself ill realize something or I'll audition for stuff etc etc and I never do. I have many many many great ideas and my voice gets better everyday but I need put in the work or had the courage to release anything. this year I want to work on that and I won't promise myself that ill release music and go after acting roles but I want to gain the confidence to do so.

Giving back to my body/ mind

I wanton work out more and eat heather. nothing too crazy, I just want to be fit and cautious of what I put in my body. I also want to get into spirituality again and journaling.

Never feeling entitled to someone else's feelings

This one pertains to relationships and love. Last year I I was treated like a princess by this guy but I wasn't attracted to him even though I agreed to dates and such. I had realized that just because someone treats you right doesn't mean you own them ANYTHING. If you're not attracted to them or if the attraction fizzles away like it did for me, you gotta end it there. Im going into this year knowing that now. I love getting attention but I need something long lasting.

Never apologizing for vocalizing what I want

I'm ambitious. I have crazy ideas and I'm stubborn. Which can be a good thing in this case bcuz your dreams are never too big. Your wishes are never too obscure. Pace yourself but never give yourself unnecessary limits. Shoot for the stars and NEVER apologize for it. NEVER apologize for speaking your truth.

BUT NONETHELESS I'M EXCITED FOR 2023. MY NOODAL RETURN IS THROUGHOUT THIS YEAR AND MY SOALR RETURN LOOKS INTERESTING FOR SURE AND IM EXCITED FOR THE TRANSITS TO COME. I REALLY WROTE THIS FOR MYSELF TO COME BACK TO BUT ANYONE CAN ALSO APPLY THIS TO THEMSELVES FOR THE NEW YEAR 💋

-⚜️💫⚜️

#happy new year #random thoughts #goals #blog post #astrology #astro notes #astro observations #astro placements #astrology notes

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julieverne · 10 months

Text

Maura never compromised quality in anything.

Except humans.

They were all imperfect. They all required compromise.

Garret hadn't been able to stand up to his family for her. And there was the whole murder thing too.

Edward hadn't been able to stand up for his family for her.

Ian was a criminal, but he'd have been perfect if he could stay in one place longer than two weeks.

Dennis had made her compromise her morals. And tried to kill her. No one was perfect, but still.

When it came to pearls and silks and jewelry, Maura never compromised. When it came to hiring staff, she never compromised on their qualifications, no matter how socially awkward they were.

When it came to people Maura let in her heart, she compromised.

There were her birth parents, for example. A mobster who looked at her like she was a sunset. A doctor that loved a mass murderer. Biological parents that loved her fiercely and remotely.

And Cailin. Not that she was a criminal or perfect, she was just... a teenager. And that required compromise. But Maura did love her too. She was smart - the Martin genes, Maura assumed - and when she was thoughtful she always managed to dismantle Maura's misconceptions of selfish teenagers.

And then there was her adopted family too. Constance - Maura had longed to feel loved by her, but she'd known she hadn't deserved it. Finding the circumstances of her birth revealed part of the reasons, but Maura had taken what little she could get until Jane called them both on their bullshit.

And Arthur. Maura lied for him. He was a weak, reclusive, cheat. But she loved him too.

And then... her other family. The Rizzolis.

Maura liked privacy and social rules, things that calmed her. The Rizzolis never knocked, never asked if they could come over.

Except Jane. Even though it had been years, Jane usually knocked if she hadn't asked Maura if she could come over, or if she hadn't driven Maura home, the assumption being she would be invited inside. Jane knew her so well she could usually diffuse whatever other social situation was upsetting her - like any of the other people on her list.

Maura still had to compromise with Jane. She had to make guesses at work. She had to do delicate technical work with Jane breathing down her neck. But the intent coming from Jane wasn't entirely selfish when this happened. It was Jane trying to encourage her, trying to be supportive, usually realising when she wasn't and excusing herself.

Maura didn't have to make herself smaller to fit in beside Jane. She didn't have to trim off parts of her personality and discard them to talk to her. She could just exist without compromise. She could sleep soundly with her head on Jane's chest.

Maura looked for certain things in a partner, the first and foremost being sexual attraction. But that had steered her wrong in the past, so perhaps that was all she would have to compromise.

Jane stirred beneath Maura's cheek, and Jane's fingers brushed through Maura's hair a moment later, Jane's chest rising as she yawned. The moments like these were always perfect. They made Maura feel cherished and loved. She'd marry Jane, if she could, have this every morning even if she had to swear an oath of chastity for the rest of her days. There was no sex in the world that felt as good as waking in Jane's warm embrace. There was no better co-parent she could ever find.

But Jane's fatal flaw was her relentless rejection of anything that wasn't pure heterosexuality. So Maura made the compromise, and once more took what she could get.

Jane hadn't realised Maura was awake, and her fingers roamed gently over Maura's back. She could feel the longing and regret in Jane's touch, and it made her want to weep.

But Jane was the person who taught her not to accept less from the people in her life, so reluctantly she raised her head and looked Jane in the eyes.

"I would like a civil union. For tax purposes. I'm not going to find anyone I love more than you, and I'm sick of trying to pretend I ever will."

Jane looked as though Maura had hit her.

"But we're not - I'm not -"

"We don't have to be. It can just be like this. I don't want or need anything other than what we already have, I just want you to know. That you're the person in my life. I don't think it's romantic or sexual, but I feel like - you know the Greek myth where people were created with four legs and arms and two heads, and Zeus got mad and split them in half, destined humans to seek forever for their other half? I'm done looking."

"What if I fall in love with someone else?"

"Why didn't you go be with Casey?" Maura asked. "The truth."

"I couldn't leave you. Not for him. Not for anyone." Jane looked away as though she was ashamed. "What does it mean?"

"I think it means we are each other's primary relationship. Even with Jack, I never felt like I was home until you were here."

"And we don't have to... hook up or anything?" Jane whispered.

Maura chuckled. Jane was nothing if not predictable. "We don't, Jane. You've fulfilled all the rest of my criteria for a partner. Not the society and education criteria I used to have - that left me with people like Garret and Edward. Not the criteria for attraction, because I had that with Dennis and Brad and Giovanni, and see how they worked out? My criteria have changed, and I would only consider committing myself to someone who doesn't care about my fortune - you don't. Someone who doesn't care about my gang affiliations - you don't. Someone who stands up for me, someone who puts me first, some who protects me from danger. Someone who sees all of me and cherishes all of me, not just the parts they like."

"That's how I feel about you," Jane said lowly. "Someone who doesn't see me as broken, someone who doesn't mind my crazy family and my awful hours at work. Someone who makes up reasons for me to hold them so I don't have to admit that I need to be held. I just - I never saw myself with a woman. Or without a - a relationship with sex in it."

"We can try sometime," Maura said, "but it's not as important to me as having the relationship we already have. I'll never expect it from you, and I'll never be hurt that you don't want it for me."

"We can revisit that, can't we?" Jane asked. "If anything changes. You're gorgeous; you should be with someone attracted to you. Someone who desires you."

"I get to decide who I deserve," Maura said sternly. "And I had no choice. The only choice I've made is to tell you."

"What if things change if we don't work together? You once said we were situational friends - work friends."

"If I called from the airport -"

"I'd come get you."

"What if it was a time-sensitive child abduction case?"

"I'd come get you," Jane reiterated, and as far as Maura could tell she meant it. Not that she'd call her away from a case where a life was at stake, but she'd always known Jane would put her first.

"How are we going to explain it?"

Maura sighed. The concept that love like this could exist without a sexual element - there were clearly romantic elements, the way Jane always opened doors for her, the way Jane held an umbrella over her, the way Jane looked at her when she thought she wasn't looking, the way Jane looked at her even when Maura was looking - was relatively new to her.

"They used to call it a Boston Marriage, although now I believe it's called a queerplatonic relationship."

"That would make us queer," Jane said, her nose scrunching. Maura shrugged, liking the way her chest moved against Jane's.

"I've been considering myself heteroflexible for a while. If I weren't asking you this, I'd be dating women instead. I'd just rather be - with you. In whatever context you'd take me."

"Okay," Jane said, and Maura smiled. "I mean. Not okay, not just yet. I mean, okay, I'll think about it. I'm not opposed but this is all new to me. You've been thinking about this for a while."

"I have," Maura admitted. She let her head drop back to Jane's chest, and it didn't feel like a compromise at all when Jane's hand threaded through her hair again, Jane's steady heartbeat lulling her back to sleep.

#rizzoli and isles #rizzles #rizzoli & isles #maura isles #jane rizzoli #rizzles ficlet #rizzles fanfic #queerplatonic rizzles #queerplatonic

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lvlyhao · 1 year

Text

PAC: your aesthetic

Hello, lovely people! This was soooo fun, I hope you enjoy this reading! Please also remember that my paid requests are open: you can check out the details here

♡ Please follow, like and reblog if this resonated with you so I can do more fun readings like this in the future. My paid comissions are open! ♡

How do I choose a pile?

Take a deep breath or two, close your eyes, and focus on the question we’re asking the cards today. Then, take a look at the images above. Which one of them calls your name?

───⋆☆───────────────

If you chose Sakura, welcome to pile 1!

Song: raise y_our glass (yunjin)

Cards: 9 of cups, 3 of swords

Oh, pile 1, you have such a pretty aura! What I’m getting from your energy is that you really embody that fairy, pixie aesthetic. There’s a little bit of mermaid energy as well, and something very princess-like. I see that you’re someone who’s very in touch with their emotions, and, above all, you try to stay true to your heart. While other people may shield themselves from the world to avoid heartbreak, you’re the opposite. You put yourself out there and hope for good things. Sure, sometimes you end up hurt, and those are not easy times, but you always get back on your feet.

I really adore you for this. Some people may not see that, but you’re very courageous. It’s not easy being like that, you know. Taking risks, being willing to go through some rough patches while trying to live life to the fullest. It’s an incredible choice and I’m sure you won’t regret it in the future. Please don’t let anyone tell you that you’re weak for being so sensitive. Your presence is so bright, you light up every room you walk into! That is also a type of strength: experiencing the world as cruel as it is and still managing to shine your light.

Indulge in pretty, whimsical things to romanticize your life as much as you can. I see a lot of Pinterest boards for you and listen, if you’re in doubt whether to get that cute tea set/dress/whatever, this is a sign!!! Get it!!!

If you chose Chaewon, welcome to pile 2!

Song: impurities (le sserafim)

Cards: the queen and the king of cups

First of all, I wanna say it’s amazing that you got both the queen AND the king of cups. Truly incredible. I see tons of mermaid-core energy coming from you as well, and some 2000s fashion might also be your style. Because of these cards and the song that came up, I can tell you’re someone who knows how to embrace all parts of yourself. It’s normal to want to hide what others see as impurities or imperfections, but you’ve learned how to love it all. The light, the dark, the pretty, the ugly. You can just turn it all into more love and power, and that is such a cool thing!

You might be slightly moody or stubborn at times, and you definitely have a presence that commands attention and respect. You’re a bit mysterious even without trying, and people seem to always be wondering what’s going on inside your head. In this sense, you can really balance both sides of this aesthetic. You know when to be the siren, and when to be the mermaid. I can clearly tell you’re emotionally intelligent, and that is going to lead you into very fulfilling relationships.

At the same time, I know it can be tough being like this because people tend to say you’re ‘too much’. Don’t let that get to you, honey. You’re not too much. You’re just perfect, and if someone doesn’t get that, let them go. They’re not enough. Indulge in lots of sparkly, sea-green and blue accessories, because they look gorgeous on you!

If you chose Kazuha, welcome to pile 3!

Song: good parts (le sserafim)

Cards: 3 of pentacles, knight of wands

Your energy is addictive, pile 3, wow! First off, you’ve most likely heard this before, but good things come in threes. Not only do you have the 3 of pentacles, but my deck also depicts the knight with 3 main figures in the card, so this is some powerful energy. I see a little bit of everything in you. You have that it-girl presence, the academia/ivy league brains, the angel looks… You’re basically that one person who has it all!

I see that you’re very social and you enjoy being a leader. You can be pretty decisive when needed and you have quite a keen eye. It’s easy for you to see what each person offers and brings to the table. It’s that ability to read people that makes you so charismatic. You just always know exactly what to say, and it’s sooo fun to be around you! Definitely the life of the party. Additionally, it makes others kinda baffled how you can manage to party till 3 am one day and show up to class looking perfect the next morning haha

I won’t try to label you, though. I can tell you see no need for being just one type of person. It’s a bit restricting, right? So we can skip that. My tip for you is to travel whenever you can and spend your time with things that make you feel energized. You go!

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radical-revolution · 9 months

Text

Oh, there is such a beautiful truth to the teaching of ‘non-duality’, of course! We discover the absolute and unshakable Presence that we are, prior to the story of our lives. We touch That which never changes in the midst of all external change. Life itself. Our true nature. Prior to thought and feeling and perception and sensation. Deathless, eternal, still. Forever at rest.

We need nothing. We want nothing. We are nothing.

And in that nothing ‘we’ cannot even know ‘nothing’.

Yet the conceptual mind co-opts this beautiful and absolute truth. We lose ourselves in the silence and the silence becomes a new identity and we pretend that we are ‘beyond’ suffering, that we have ‘transcended’ thoughts and feelings, that we are ‘enlightened’ now. Our untouchability becomes a mask, a persona, a new place to hide.

Our new identity becomes ‘no identity at all’.

“Only non-duality is real. Duality is an illusion”.

We are no longer a person. We are “Pure Awareness”.

Yes, it’s true. And it’s totally untrue at the same time.

You are unlimited Awareness but you are also a fragile and vulnerable and delicate and passionate and limited human being. You feel deeply. You hurt, sometimes. You have wounds that are longing to be felt, seen, embraced, included in the bigger picture of You. Your wounds won’t go away just because you’ve discovered your true nature. They won’t go away just because you are ‘nobody’ now. They won’t go away just because you are a teacher, an author, a spiritual expert, an enlightened one, a non-person, a non-non-person, or whatever dream character you’ve dreamed yourself to be in this great and lucid play.

For many, many years I have been emphasizing the ‘other side’ of non-duality (yes that is a paradox and yes all words are temporary here). And the ‘other side’ is nothing less than a courageous embrace of duality, a deep YES to our humanness – our sorrow, our shame, our pain, our fears, our confusion, our loneliness, our doubts and our despair. A YES to our vulnerability, to being touched deeply and to touching life in return. To embracing our grief, our inner victim, our chaos and our sweet imperfection. To loving this fleshy mortal mess that we are.

If we bury our shame, our guilt, our wounds, if we suffocate the precious inner child and pretend to be free and perfect and enlightened and ‘done’, our wounds will only fester and poison and drain us from the inside. We will act out in unconscious, habitual and unkind ways, to ourselves and the ones we love.

What we resist persists, and what we try to numb ends up numbing us in return.

I truly don’t see our humanity as divided from our divinity. I don’t see ‘no self’ as the final truth, but a place to begin. We are nothing and we are also something! We are Awareness and we are human, the absolute as the relative, the sacred as the manifest, the ocean dancing as the wave. We bleed. We hurt. We need help. Sometimes we just want a brother or sister to hold us. Sometimes we tire of being ‘the spiritual one’, ‘the one who knows’, ‘the expert’. Sometimes we just need to fall to our knees in humility and ask the Universe for support and guidance.

We are gods and we are so very fragile. We live so close to life, so close to death. So close to joy, so close to sorrow. We are invulnerable and we can feel the world's pain as our own, in compassion.

I want to speak up for a non-duality that is nothing less than a full embrace of duality. A compassionate, heart-centered non-duality that loves the world, that infuses the Earth with empathy, that grounds itself in the struggles of daily life, that bows to form and celebrates form and un-shames form, that drenches every thought, sensation and feeling in love and understanding. That says ‘Hey, it’s okay to be human, it’s okay to hurt, and your sorrow is sacred, and your fear isn’t a sign that you’re broken but a sign that you are sensitive and open and awake, and these painful parts are only parts longing for acceptance…”

And in the end, remember, even these words must collapse under their own weight. There is no nonduality or duality. Even that mythology must crumble into the vast mystery of Now.

There is only this unspeakable feeling of the breath rising and falling, and the heart beating in the chest, and the mysterious and magical weight of the earth-bound body, and the sound of the bird singing, the traffic outside, and the tingly aliveness in the toes, the hands, the throat, the fluttering in the belly, and this wonderful sense of being alive, prior to words, prior to the search itself, prior to all things, and there are no experts here, and we are all beginning again, in every moment.

- Jeff Foster

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abandonedpie · 3 months

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Little bit of a vent, not that serious but slightly heavier than you'd expect from the subject.

TL;DR designing an ACNH island is suffering and I took that personally

So my island has been in a WIP state since its creation. Got fairly far with implementing my plans, and I've worked on pieces of it here and there, but recently, I was inspired to redesign the whole thing (again). No longer liked all the ideas I had liked before, and overall felt it was lacking. With some struggle, I started coming up with new ideas that I felt good about.

But the thing that has slowed me down the most? That has me already doubting or even hating my brand new ideas?

Paths. It always comes down to the paths.

Custom paths? Default paths? Both have pros and cons to consider. Fellow ACNH players are likely familiar with these issues: loss of footstep sounds, limited design slots to work with (is it worth using 12+ slots for a single path border?), having to make every design from scratch (no Online for me), lines of grass left between paths/inclines/buildings...

And I can't decide. I can't find an answer. Whatever I try, whatever I imagine, I don't like the result. I've hit a wall, and that wall is my own perfectionism. Clearly there is no perfect solution, and I have to compromise to progress—"finished, not perfect" and all that—but I don't want to compromise the vision I have for my island, even though I know that vision is unattainable.

I just want to have an island I'm happy with. And it feels like no matter what I do with it, I'll never be satisfied. I've seen such beautiful pictures and videos of other people's islands, and while they inspire me and fuel my creativity, they also raise my standards for my own island because I know it could be so much better.

I want to be able to settle for "good enough." But it feels like trying to paint a rainbow with one or two colors missing or not quite the right shade. Maybe I can make something pretty, but it's not what I envisioned or want.

So I think, let's just come up with something different. There are plenty of designs I would like just as much or more, right? I'm already struggling because I like multiple exclusive aesthetics/layouts/etc. and I can't fit them all on one island. But...paths are kinda omnipresent, and that means I have to accept them being substandard. Unless? I've considered using minimal to no paths, but I can't imagine that working for me. I'm not going for full-on natural forestcore or whatever (and even that wouldn't look its best without dirt paths, right?).

I guess I might've made this into a bigger deal than it needs to be. At this point, I feel tired and stuck and hopeless, and part of me wants to let it go. It's just a game. But I don't want to give up and leave my island a mess again. For a short while, I was excited to create, thinking I could shape my little land into something great, something I could walk through with a smile and maybe feel proud of. And now I wonder if that's really possible. There must be something I can do, something I'd like, but I don't know how to find it. I'm honestly having trouble focusing on it right now.

Seeking inspiration is a double-edged sword. As nice as other people's islands look, I know a lot of pictures are shared with filters, and even those that aren't...well, seeing images and videos is different than walking through your own island day after day.

I could go into the game's flaws and limitations, but this is what we've got. And it's not all bad. There's potential. The problem is my own inner critic, and I don't know how to get past it.

The best part is that I've been trying to fight this perfectionism with the game from the beginning, when I last restarted my island and named it Wabisabia after the term wabi-sabi, the Japanese ideal/aesthetic centered on transience and imperfection. You can see how well that's going for me ha ha ha! Even if I want to embrace it in theory, it's not so easy to break through the perfectionism cemented inside me.

Anyway, yeah. Back to agonizing over my island I guess. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

#pietalks #the woes of being a perfectionist #current mood: family guy death pose #eagerly anticipating the next animal crossing game #I hope for one to release late this year or maybe next year #they will surely improve on New Horizons. right? ...right?#please heed the pleas of your players #obviously you can't please everyone but consider the things most players want added/changed #assuming the next game doesn't take the series in a vastly different direction

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totallynotthecrystalskull · 1 year

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Do you have any tips for recreating the Deltarune sprite style?

Hmm... I'm not entirely sure if I've got any 100% full proof tips for the style (nor will I pretend I'm an expert on the style), but I'll give what I can for ya! So, first up, for any given color on a sprite, I'd suggest only using two colors. One brighter highlight, and one darker base/tone. the shading in DR doesn't tend to get super complex, so most of the time having only two tones for a part should work super well. Bonus points if one or both of the colors are then reincorporated into other parts too, like using one section's highlight as a shade for another, or using the same shade for multiple colors.

Second, a few in-between pixels can help give depth to sprites. You ever see those one or two pixels in-between an outline and the base color, and it uses the same color as the shade? Well, those are in-betweens, and while UT and Lightworld style sprites don't tend to use them, the Darkworld sprite tends to have way more of them, and they help distinguish Darkworld sprites. Third, don't be afraid to use a different color than outright black for your character outlines. There are a lot of sprites that use pure black like Lightworld sprites or sprites for Darkners, but if you're making a darkworld sprite for a Lightner, than get a little creative. Use a very dark tint of whatever their main color is, and that'll help them feel like more of a lightner. It's not a hard-n-fast rule (Berdly uses a black outline despite being a lightner), but it's a tool that can be used.

Fourth, use plenty of ref material. Take other DR sprites, compare them to your work, see what might be different, how you could fix it, and just try your best. And finally, remember that DR's stlye isn't perfect, has plenty of imperfections, and that it's ok to go for designs that aren't super consistent. It's part of the charm in my opinion, because even if it's definitely improved since UT, the spritework is still obviously no Metal Slug or anything, and I kinda love it for it. If you've got differences or flaws between your sprite and the official style, just remember that the official DR sprites are also pretty inconsistent, so your problems might not even register as looking wrong. Sometimes it's even fun to embrace a sprite's initial mistake and then turn it into something amazing/fun. And so uh... yeah, there's my tips. Not really sure if it helped all that much, but I hope they do! If I'm being totally honest here, my style's actually more closely based upon the style of the Undertale mod Bits and Pieces, as it's what I originally was mimicking, and it just so happened to be conveniently similar to DR's style. These are a few character sprites that I made in the style of the mod, with these all being the winners of a contest the community had to get NPCs into the mod (and the final two are mine).

I'd also made some sprites in past that were for a game project I was helping out with. It never saw fruition, though the styled was obviously influenced by the Undertale style, but they were different and they were also... well, a little rougher considering I made them when I was just getting into pixel art. I still like them and I don't think I did too bad for at the time, but it definitely doesn't match my current style (plus, the project's kinda dead in the water anyways)

#deltarune #pixel art #sprite art #pixel art tutorial #maybe not quite a tutorial #pixel art tips #deltarune style

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funkymbtifiction · 1 year

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hi! question about the frustration types/wings/trifix - is there a part of them LIKES being in a state of frustration? and if so can they ever really overcome that or be happy with how things are? i read a lot about how the purpose to learning the enneagram is to eventually notice when you’re doing personality things and unlearn them/realize you can choose not to. but can someone who becomes happy by being unhappy, negative or frustrated ever be capable of not only realizing life is okay as it is but also feeling happy/fulfilled/satisfied with how things are, without being dissatisfied with the lack of frustration itself? i know someone who’s type i am unsure of (i thought he was a 6 bc he’s very into the concept of allies and enemies and identity politics, you’re with me or against me, and he is often unsure of himself/indecisive, however i also see many traits of 1 anger at an imperfect world/perfectionism and 4 drowning in misery) who displays a LOT of frustration. i’ve rarely seen him happy or satisfied with anything. nothing and no one is ever quite good enough for him and something is always wrong with him/his life/his people and when nothing is objectively wrong he nitpicks until he finds something wrong and if you try to help or offer solutions, you’re wrong, they won’t work, or he admits maybe they will work if he tried but he won’t because he’s not in the mood or somehow isn’t capable of doing it. i understand to an extent because when i’m upset, i can act like this too. but once i calm down i want solutions and i want to fix it. he doesn’t seem to ever get to that part and if he did ever fix his problems i’m not quite sure what he would do with himself. is that how the frustration triad is? if so can they ever really feel content in life, even with enough personal growth to notice their personality style and choose differently?

Yes, that is correct. No one does anything without getting something out of it, and the frustration triad actively works to keep part of themselves frustrated and dissatisfied, because life doesn’t measure up to their desired ideal. It’s a subconscious choice.

It is possible to change this, but the person has to first acknowledge that the frustration is a choice, and then decide to change it. They have to see this habitual tendency to embrace chronic dissatisfaction as a pattern and recognize that it’s optional, and then want to do something about it. They have to want to change, and acknowledge that this current behavior is not working for me (it is self-sabotaging me in some way, by making me always frustrated by life, relationships, etc), and accept the burden of self-responsibility in changing it, for their own self-betterment. Frustration has become a pattern with them, but it’s not chronic – it’s a choice and they can choose to catch themselves looking for what’s missing and instead, choose to embrace the happiness of the moment.

Your friend sounds like a 6 with a strong 4 fix; double-reactivity – my life is awful, you need to agree with me how awful it is, and it can’t be fixed, because it just… wouldn’t work, and nothing is good enough, and cue the self-pity, the whining, and the drawing attention to whatever is wrong. To be honest, it sounds like a 649. There’s a reason they’re roasted online as the “Whiny Tears.” 6 is reactive and negative, looking for what’s wrong and missing; 4 over-inflates wounds, problems, and deficiencies and remains frustrated as a way to show everyone their life is broken and cannot be fixed; throw 9ish apathy and inertia in there, and you have two reactive fixes that obsess and complain and draw attention to problems, along with two twithdrawn fixes that don’t assume the problem is theirs to fix, leading to an endless state of “wallowing without seeking solutions.”

The 6 over-thinks, the 4 over-feels, and the 9 does nothing about it. A 469 in any order has to come to terms with their negativity and see that as a choice; with their ongoing frustration and realize that’s optional; they have to choose to look for the positive since their default is the negative, and above all, they have to learn to productively think about things (as opposed to ruminating on them, or thinking about them without ever instigating change) and figure out the direct actions they could take that would change their life for the better. It won’t be easy, but if they decide it’s worth doing, they can pursue it through self-observation and choosing to change their reactions, by not allowing themselves to dramatize their problems as “unsolvable,” but instead, asking themselves what they’re going to DO to resolve this ongoing problem.

#question #469 #enneagram

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