#but like. did the parents ever wonder. after months of not hearing from their kid. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ciy0 · 4 months

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☆*:.｡. MY ANGEL .｡.:*☆

Summary- Mingyu’s heart always had and always will belong to one girl. No matter how much she pushed and kicked him away he would always come back crawling on his knees gladly, because to him she was his everything.

Word count- 9.8k 💀💀 [say sike rn]

Content Warnings- 18+ Sexual Scenes and Vulgar Language, Angst!, Romance, Some Humor, Hurt and comfort, POV changes, Y/n is a ice queen/tsundere, Implied Foreigner, Mental health, Idol au!She is also apart of Le Sserfim, Nayeon & Mingyu date, other idols appear, Cheating mentioned, Insecurities, Breakups and Makeups, Verbally Abusive Parent, Mingyu begs on his knees, Head over heels inlove with Y/n, Cutting mentioned, Soulmate type beat, Y/n has it rough pls be nice to her, Pet names [PLS BE SAFE AND INCHARGE OF THE CONTENT YOU CONSUME]

A/n BRUH i WAS NOT EXPECTING THIS TO BE SO DAMN Long. I just wanted to write one scene i swear but then i had to make it make sense so then it jus kept getting longer and longer then i got invested oml. Anyways i used to write fics for anime’s but i retired that hat a while back, i’ve been inlove with Mingyu since forever so i felt compelled to write a fic about him bc he’s my comfort space :3

☆*:.｡. .｡.:*☆

To many people being able to win the affections from Kim Mingyu was seen as a blessing from God and it was - atleast for Nayeon- but as her rose tinted shades slowly began to dissolve around month 3 in their fresh relationship she begrudgingly noticed many things in which she had not before (curse her attentiveness).

Finally getting to proudly proclaim Mingyu as hers within their idol friend circle was a dream come true. And to her he was nothing less than perfect, always attentive to her wants, needs, and desires and constantly showering her with boundless amounts of affection. But even she couldn’t fool herself as the new relationship smell began to waft away, and despite her desperate attempts to be as wonderful to him and he was to her one thing became painfully clear; Mingyu was not inlove with her.

Well obviously he didn’t hate her, nor did he make her feel less then. She’s sure that he had some sort of love for her since they were friends before becoming lovers but it wasn’t the kind that would lead to the house and the kids and the big white picket fence she so often dreamt about. It wasn’t the kind that she held for him.

In the beginning it was hard to tell, being so blinded by finally being able to be by his side. She had finally gained the courage to confess when he walked her home after an outing with mutual friends, ever the gentleman. Maybe it was the shots of soju at the time or maybe it was time of year where everyone wanted a lover for the winter holidays. She remembered faintly hearing a corny christmas song in the distance, probably from inside a nearby store, and the snow gently pattering on her face as they walked in a comfortable silence.

“I love you,” she whispered meekly seemingly out of nowhere. Her cheeks heated despite the cold weather as she stopped walking, eyes glued to the snowy ground. She worried maybe he didn’t hear or thought she meant as a friend but she heard a long exhale of breath from her left as his footsteps also came to their own halt a few paces ahead of her own. It was quiet for a bit, the only sounds being a distant holiday tune and the wind accompanied by snow. She squeezed her eyes shut preparing for the embarrassing rejection she foolishly set her own self up for. Mingyu always treated her well but never treated her more than a friend or different than anyone else and she knew that so why did she have to go and say something so dumb, so stupid! Was it because he offered to walk her home? Well he’s always like that it’s nothing special, ugh what if she ruined-

“… Then,” Large feet suddenly appeared right in front of hers jolting her out of her spiral of thoughts and a large warm hand rested on her cheek, gently urging her head up until her eyes met with his.

“…Are you busy tomorrow?” He grinned wolfishly with a small tilt of his head.

A few weeks of courting and cute dates led to him casually introducing Nayeon as his girlfriend at a friend’s dinner party, hands held together. It was so sudden but she couldn’t help but cheese goofily as he sat her down on his lap before smoothly joining into the rooms conversation. He’d softly caress her thigh and give her chaste kisses periodically throughout the night. She was happy, very happy in fact, happy and inlove. She finally had what she thought she always wanted and wished she could’ve lived in that bliss for forever but alas life was never that simple nor accommodating.

The first thing she noticed was the zoning out. The times when he’d be aimless staring at some spot in the room completely lost in a daze. It honestly didn’t happen too too often, a soft tap of the shoulder would instantly bring him back to her but she noticed it regardless. But one time it happened during a night of passion that often plagued her thoughts more than she’d like.

Nayeon buried her head further into the pillows as Mingyu rolled his hips languidly into hers. She gasped softly as she angled her head to gaze upon the adonis behind her only to see that far away look in his eyes again.

“ Fuuuuck,” He groaned throwing his head back,” Angel - ah sh-shit!” He shook his head as she squeezed him tightly from the endearing new petname [presumably meant for her] kicking him out of his stupor. He took a second to catch his breath, blinking in quick succession before laying his body on top of hers leaving a wet smooch on her shoulder.

“ That’s new” She moaned seductively before he drew his hips back to resume his pace from before. All he gave was a breathy laugh and more kisses as he focused on pleasuring her until she couldn’t think anymore.

She quite liked that nickname honestly, and the way he said it too “Angel”. He never called her so desperately before and quite frankly it turned her on so much— too bad she never heard it again though. Well not aimed at her.

The second thing she noticed was his chest. Well moreso his heart beat or lack there of? Whenever she was with him her chest would always be a mess of butterflies, hands shaking, breath short and yet when they’d cuddle on the couch, head pressed to his toned chest there was… nothing? Well aside from a very normal beating pattern which gave signs of life of course, he was as cool as a cucumber.

The involuntary signs of love weren’t there for him like they were for her despite kissing the ground he walked on. He never struggled to stare her deeply in her eyes, his palms never sweaty when holding hands, kisses- albeit plentiful and wonderful -never starved and desperate. She knew he’d been with many girls before her and that he was use to female attention so maybe those intense signs of love weren’t appearing because he had a lot of experience, or atleast that’s what she told herself to cope until she could no longer.

Nayeon hung out back stage as Twice just finished their performance followed by Seventeen at the MAMA awards. She giggled softly as her members poked fun at her pink cheeks watching Mingyu onstage from the TV in the break room.

Soon after they finished Super the thirteen membered group filed in the break room, mingling amongst the various groups, getting snacks and cooling down. After grabbing a bottle of water Mingyu made his way over greeting Twice along the way before wrapping his arms around Nayeon and snuggling into her.

“Ewww you’re so sweaty” She teased pretending to be grossed out when it was the quite the opposite, the sweat glistening off his caramel skin doing sinful things to her.

“Hehe hi baby,” He scrunched his nose as he kissed her cheek playfully.

They bantered back and forth amongst the low chatter in the room watching as the next group went up to perform. She wasn't quite sure when his side of the conversation had quieted down but when she looked to her side he was staring intently at the live broadcasting. She too aimed her attention towards the TV to see what had him so preocuppied.

"Ohhh Le Sserafim?" She nodded knowingly, " They're your label mates now right? They are so popular these days, I'm a big fan too haha my bias is Chaewon!" She danced a little in her seat as the point choreo of Antifragile came up in the performance, " Which one's your fav?"

She leaned her head on his chest, cheerful humming coming to a quaking halt when she felt the thundering pulse of his heart beat blaring against her eardrum.

"... Y\n" he murmured mindlessly, eyes never once leaving the Tv.

" Ohh um yeah!" she sputtered quickly trying to regain her cool, "She's a really popular member, her stage presence is really solid too for only being active for about 2 years i think its been... she's very beautiful, uh she's cool with Jihyo and Somi they hang out sometimes..."

Nayeon wanted to slap herself for the needless word vomit but she couldnt help it. She was pulling for straws, not expecting the reaction she's been trying to pull out of Mingyu to happen now of all times and apparently not because of her. Perhaps he was just tired from his performance still, maybe his was just a big fanboy - men will be men even Mingyu it seemed, perhaps she was reading all too much into it. She decided not to say anything more and just stayed cuddled up to him. He smoothly brought his left hand to her arm rubbing it gently pressing her into himself chuckling softly at her frazzled manner.

" You did well today babe, go ahead and rest for a bit" He whispered as he pressed a kiss to her hairline, " I'll be right here."

Maybe she did need a nap she thought to her self but even as she yawned sleepily she couldn't help but notice the thundering in his heart rested only when their performance finished.

But what really nailed it in the coffin was what Nayeon saw later that night at Somi’s after party, and moreso heard. It’s one thing to come to the conclusion that the man she loved didn’t love back in the same caliber as she did but atleast he chose to be with her right? Atleast he only looked at her and only cared about her. Right?? She could work with that at least even if it was one sided but there’s another level of pain when the reason his palms don’t get sweaty, the reason his eyes don’t glaze over in adoration, the reason he’s never said “i love you” back is because he’s so hopelessly inlove with another that he could hardly contain himself.

The venue was crowded with so many different faces, some known and unknown coming from various groups and companies. Owe it to Somi to know everyone. Nayeon and Mingyu were together as always, a few drinks in watching as Hoshi spoke animatedly making the group of friends laugh. It was a start to a great night after the adrenaline rush of their earlier performances.

“Oh wait! Y/n” Somi suddenly shot up running over to you as you jus entered the venue before dragging you into their circle , “Everyone say hi, Y/n say hi too!”

Nayeon watched as you smiled softly at Somi’s antics before bowing and greeting the people around you. You had a naturally alluring vibe to you that made it hard to not look away. She wasn’t a hater, you were stunning. And as she followed the harsh intake of air next to her she realized she wasn’t the only one who felt the same.

Nayeon gave it to Mingyu for trying but she wasn’t a fool. She had spent so long looking at him like he was the only person in the world that she quickly surmised he was only zoned in on one thing that night, that thing being you. You were a bit harder to read but woman to woman she could tell that you skillfully avoided eye contact in their general direction. And from the lovesick face he pathetically failed to conceal and longing gaze; this went above petty attraction.

Suddenly feeling lightheaded Nayeon excused herself to the bathroom, her mind bombarded with questions. Is he cheating one me? How do you know each other? Who is she to him? Do they have history? Is she… the reason he never looks at me like that?

She felt her eyes burn as she gazed in the bathroom mirror. She felt pathetic. It takes being in love to know what it looks like and Mingyu was looking at you like how she looked at him. Like you were his world. He was trying to hide it, desperately so, often cutting his eyes away from you if he caught himself staring for too long or boisterously jumping into the conversation to distract himself from you, giving Nayeon’s hand a squeeze every now and then but she saw through it all. And she loathed you for it.

By time she calmed herself down and made it back to the table her heart fell to her stomach seeing as the two people plaguing her thoughts were both suspiciously missing. Of course no one picked up on the disappearance act of the two but a quick check in with Somi directed her to the direction Mingyu excused himself too. With a quick thank you she followed swiftly, anxiousness pooling in her gut

Following down the hall the sounds of the party quieted until she heard a pair of new voices a little further down out on the balcony. The voices she had been looking for.

“You did amazing today, Angel”

That burning sensation returned to Nayeon’s eyes as she discreetly listened from inside. Angel. That was undeniably Mingyu’s voice.

“ Mingyu, i told you to stop calling me that” you corrected with a sigh, “ and thank you.”

“Fuck- I know i’m sorry, It’s still a bad habit,” he rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly , “ I-I miss you, you know… I know we didn’t end on good terms but-“

“Is this what you followed me out here to say? If so i’m going back to the party-”

Nayeon heard your heels swiftly clack shocking her thinking she would’ve been found out but then they suddenly stopped. She dared to peek over to properly view you both.

Mingyu grasped your wrist firmly, brows furrowing in frustration, “ Why are you being so cold to me? Do you get a kick out of hurting me like this huh? Is that it? I know you- look at me y/n” he tugged you softly yet firmly to face him again, eyes gazing into yours desperately look for anything, “ i know you wanted to ended things with us but do you really have to treat me like a stranger, did you really forget everything, do you really feel nothing for me anymore? I still-“

“Sunbaenim,” you looked up at him icily yanking your arm from his grasp ,” This is hardly appropriate, you have a girlfriend. It’s been months, let it go. It would’ve never worked between us anyways, Nayeon is good to you don’t be reckless over a little fling”

“Fling?! H-how could you- a fling doesn’t last for over year, a fling doesn’t make love like we did, a fling doesn’t meet your family, a fling doesn’t talk about moving in and getting married in the future dammit y/n i was inlove with you!, “ his voice trembled, fists shaking by his side, “You just iced me out of no where, ignoring my messages, stopped answering my calls, and then suddenly breaking up over text?! You keep playing down our relationship as if all of it never happened. You never even gave me a proper reason, I’m supposed to hate you for casting me aside like nothing by and yet why can’t I huh? Even while you’re glaring at me like that with those big beautiful eyes all i wanna do is make them roll back.”

Nayeon couldn’t believe her eyes when she saw his knees hit the floor, You pulled at his shoulders with a curt “enough of this” but he shook you off in favor of furrowing his head into your stomach .

“ Youre so cruel Y/n, how can you show a man heaven then yank it away from his grasp like this. You’re going to drive me insane. You know I can’t live without you, you’re the one who ruined me like this and you can’t even take responsibility for it…”

Nayeon wasn’t able to see your conflicted expression as Mingyu grasped at your waist sniffling onto the fabric of your dress but she didn’t need to.

She moved to the exit as she couldn’t bare to hear anymore but she wasnt quick enough to escape the last words Mingyu whispered.

“Fuck-I…I love you so much, Angel”

Heartbreak doesn’t even begin to describe Nayeons current emotional state. She dashed home without a word, cried in the shower and then curled up on her bed in a pile of misery. Mingyu didn’t stop by to sleep over like normal that night and it drove her mad. All she got was a goodnight text saying he was gonna stay with wonwoo. But is that really where he was? Maybe he was with y/n, moaning angel [she mocked in her head] and giving her all of himself forgetting he had a whole girlfriend. So when ever he got that distant look in his eye was he thinking of her? When he moaned angel, was that what he’d moan in her ear? Was he wishing to be inside her instead? When he was backstage did his heart beat out of his chest just by the sight of her? The reason Nayeon feels like shit is all because of her.

It took her a while before she decided to respond to Mingyu. She ignored his texts and inquiries for about a week before she sent him the “we need to talk” message. She didn’t know what to expect or where to start but she was hoping that their previous friendship would be enough for him to not completely run over her feelings anymore than the whole situation had.

He came over the the next evening after his gym session sporting a grey sweatshirt and pants combo. She couldn’t tell if this was on purpose but she had to stay strong to find the answers she so desperately needed. He gave her a quick kiss to the cheek that still made her heart jump after everything that she’s heard before promptly sitting on the couch.

Nayeon sat down awkwardly across from him not sure where to start. “um do you want anything to drink? i think i have-“ she started looking anywhere but at him.

“Nayeon,” he called gently making her look up hesitantly, “ Ask me anything, I won’t lie to you.”

He looked her earnestly in the eyes and it took Nayeon a second to come to the conclusion that he knows that she knows. Before she could question how he answered for her.

“ Somi told me you were looking for me that night,” He started slowly, “ You suddenly going home, not answering your phone, and then saying we need to talk… i pretty much guessed what was up… so ask me anything and i’ll tell you everything, you deserve to know”

She felt her eyes well up in tears at his honest reply not being able to stop herself from the question she wanted to know the most.

“Did you sleep with her while we were together?!”

“ No, I hadn’t talked to or seen her for months before we got together. I don’t know how much you saw the night of the party but I didn’t sleep with her then either.”

“…Did you want to?”

“N-Nayeon-“

“ Please just a-answer the question”

“…yeah”

She felt the frog in her throat at that but kept the questions searing her heart coming.

“ How did you two meet?”

“ I heard her singing in the practice rooms at Hybe before her debut, but i first saw her physically shortly after her debut at Mnet”

“ H-how did your relationship start?”

“ I think i was drawn when i first heard her voice from way back then, when we officially met I-I wanted to get close to her and the more time we spent together the more harder it got to stay away”

“ We’ve been friends this whole time, how come i’ve never met her?”

“ She didn’t want anyone to know we were dating. So we never interacted in public only wonwoo really knew. Since we live together”

Nayeon tried to think back to around the time they were supposedly dating. She’d sometimes catch hints of hickies on his neck or him smiling at his phone but she just thought he was just fooling around and not committed to anyone. She remembered feeling severely envious though, because that was the happiest she had ever seen him. And if everything he says is true it matches the depressive episode he was in months before they got together, if that’s when she cut him off from what he said that night.

She wiped her tears feeling a bit more whole to look him in the eyes again, “ But why her? Don’t get me wrong she’s pretty and all but you’re not the type of guy who only cares about that. The way she talked to you at the party—she seems like a fucking bitch”

He actually laughed out loud at that, a soft look taking over his face, “Yeah i know, she’s hardheaded, mean, and rude but that’s just one aspect to her. She’s also creative, headstrong, caring, and sensitive… Nayeon I’m sorry,” he switched suddenly, “ I might’ve not physically cheated on you but i still disrespected this relationship and our friendship. I enjoyed our time together and i really wanted it to be you, I wanted to forget about Y/n and live a nice easy love with you b-but seeing her at the party reminded jus how far gone i am. One look and i’m back where I started” He lowered his head in his hands, “You don’t have to forgive me but please know nothing is wrong with you, you are amazing I just- I’m-“

“In love with Y/n right?,” Nayeon finished tears flowing freely at some point. She wish she could yell and scream and call him names but even now she felt his apology from the bottom of his heart. It was never her, it was never gonna truly be her.

She felt the couch next to her dip and the warmth of his embrace. She couldn’t help but fall into it, her cries tumbling into hiccups, mourning of her love lost. “S-So are we done? You’re breaking up with m-me? Are you going to her now?”

He patted her back softly, “ I don’t want to hurt you anymore, knowing i can’t give you what you want and deserve… and even though i love Y/n as i’m sure you heard she’s adamant on pushing me away. We haven’t even talked since that night… plus i’m pretty sure y/n still has my number blocked lol”

“I d-didn’t know you liked emotional unavailable girls Mingyu,” she tried to joke between her gasps, “i would’ve changed my tactics” she wailed into his sweatshirt.

She felt his chest rumble in suppressed laughter before whispered apologies into her hair. It hurt so bad but she could never hate Mingyu. You on the other hand is a different story but she knew albeit not anytime soon she’d eventually have to come to terms with this and hopefully one day her and Mingyu could get back to how they were before, as friends.

☆*:.｡. .｡.:*☆

Mingyu left Nayeon apartment guiltily feeling lighter despite breaking his friends heart. In times like these he cursed you so much for causing all this chaos in his life and at the same time he imagines you in his embrace, whispering sweet everythings into your ear.

He threw his keys in his dish tray once reaching his apartment before grabbing a beer and joining wonwoo in the living room.

“…Well you don’t have any scratches on your face,” Wonwoo analyzed, “ So i’m guessing things went well i hope?”

Mingyu scoffed sarcastically while cracking open his can, “Hyung what the hell am i doing, something must be wrong with my head…” he pouts before taking a big gulp.

“Yeah they say love is one hell of a drug,” Wonwoo offers, “But honestly are you really okay with ending things with Nayeon, it’s safe and certain unlike Y/n”

Mingyu takes a deep breath before answering, “ As long as Y/n exists I don’t think i can truly be happy with another. I don’t know what she slipped into my food when i wasn’t looking but nothing compares. Nayeon is everything right on paper but why…. i jus can’t- It’s ugh,” he gives up and ops for his drink again.

Wonwoo ponders for a moment, “ You are a bit of a masochist,”

“Ya.”

“ So when are you gonna talk to Y/n? Makes no sense breaking up with Nayeon because of her if not to work things out right?”

“ But hyung, that’s what i tried to do at the party, literally begged on my knees and she still left me there,” he laid back in the couch as if he were in a therapy session, “ I jus don’t get it, we were doing so well. As long as we were together everything was gonna be alright, the power could be out and she’d find flashlights and build a pillow fort. She’d find the coolest art pieces and trinkets and gift them to me, she’d always be my second hand in the kitchen even if it’s jus stirring and taste testing. Everyday felt like a dream, there was never a dull time. We could literally have the time of our lives trapped in a cardboard box. We’d spend nights just drinking wine and talking about our hopes and aspirations and everything under the sun, i’d do anything to make her dreams come true and she had the nerve to say it was a fucking fling??”

Upon reminiscing he couldn’t help the tightness in his chest and on top of that the resurfacing of anger because how can all of that happen and you act as if it didn’t. No matter what you tried to paint it out as he knew it was real for both of you.

Wonwoo patted his shoulder reassuringly feeling him getting worked up again. “ Didnt everything change after she came back from visiting her family after the Le Sserafim mini tour? I remember didn’t all her members go visit her family too?”

“Yeah why?” Mingyu questioned not understanding what he was getting at.

“Try asking them, maybe they know something you don’t. I’m not judging but I always thought it was weird how she never talks about her family. Whenever you’d ask to meet them she’d change the subject. Maybe it’s got something to do with that,” Wonwoo was really wracking his brain overtime trying to find some sort of lead. He’d seen Mingyu and Y/n before all this mess and he was convinced they were soulmates then so maybe they just needed some guidance now.

Mingyu drunk in silence as he thought over Wonwoo’s words more. He remembered how scared you were when you first met his family despite his adamant affirmations that they already loved you. You were so jittery and out of your element telling him later that night you’ve never seen a family so loving. He considered his family pretty average though. He remembered the fear in your eyes when he asked to meet your family only for you to pull him in for a hot kiss purposefully rendering his brain off course. He didn’t think much of it at the time but now he’s starting to see Wonwoo’s train of thought

“I’ll try contacting Yunjin”

After asking around in a couple of friend groups he finally was linked to Yunjin’s Kakao. Despite being head over heels in love with a member in her group she had little inkling about the severity of his and Y/n’s relationship until the end that is. Normally Y/n would sneak out to his place which was why Wonwoo knew her pretty well, but her members only found out when Mingyu barged into their dorms demanding to talk to Y/n after her casual “let’s break up” text those many months ago. He had no idea how the explaining went after that but Yunjin didn’t seem too surprised at his, “Hey yunjin, this is Mingyu… do you think we could meet up and talk soon. I’m sure i don’t have to tell you to keep this between us.”

A couple hours later he received his reply.

“Sunbaenim! Ofc we should be back in Korea in a week. Cafe by hybe sound good?”

A week came sooner than one would think, his mind giddy because maybe he could finally get some progress in understanding why you left him. He waited patiently at the back of the cafe with a baseball cap tapping away at his phone. He opted to swipe through his secret gallery of pics he saved of you even after the break up, thumb running softly along the pixels of your cheek.

“Sunbaenim!”

Mingyu jumped at the sudden appearance of fiery hair as Yunjin sat down. He greeted her before calling the barista over to get her drink settled along with his.

“ How were the concerts in Paris?” He made small talk.

“ It was our first time going, it’s so beautiful there and God the food was amazing,” she spoke animatedly before squinting her eyes knowingly,” but i know that’s not what you messaged me for.”

He held his hand ups in defeat with a sheepish smile, “How is she?”

“ Honestly… Y/n-ah is normally the one who brings us all together and the glue to our group but she’s been so quiet lately which is so unlike her, “ Yunjin eyes glossed a bit, “I worry about her a lot because only few know how much she cares and how much she hurts. She never lets us in and that’s why i was so shocked that she was seeing someone but i was glad because she was so happy. Her smile really reached her eyes you know, even though at the time i didn’t know who it was and i only found out cause she left her phone in the living room and i saw the name “Nose Picker🩵” and you messaging you loved her and for her to get some rest.” She giggled softly at the memory.

Mingyu’s heart squeezed at the stupid nickname he asked her to change a million times. “ D-did she tell you anything after i stormed into your dorms, sorry about that by the way,”

Yunjin looked hesitant not sure how to phrase what wasn’t in her place to say. “Um- after you left she just got so quiet b-but that night i heard her crying and so i went over to her and held her. But she jus kept saying so many negative things about herself and repeating the things her mom-“ Yunjin clasped her mouth feeling wrong for exposing your problems like this without your consent. You explicitly told her to never talk about that night but Mingyu staring at her with desperation in his eyes was breaking her resolve.

“Yunjin what is it?! Please tell me, more than anyone i want her happiness Yunjin please,” he grasped her hands tears threatening to drop,” Please”

Orbs shaking Yunjin sighed in defeat before continuing in a meek voice ,” The other members didn’t really understand because her family speaks english but I understood…. I understood e-everything…”

Yunjin followed as you led the girls into your childhood home. That morning you were on edge but since the last touring city ended up in your home town everyone insisted on meeting your family and sleeping over that night. Yunjin was excited to see a part of you you don’t normally share in hopes of getting closer to you and bragging about you to your family.

Your family were relatively normal looking and kind enough to them as everyone gathered around the dinner table. The spread of food was vast for such short notice, not having to worry about diets since you all were on break after this was a nice bonus as well. Everyone fell into a lull of conversation but something felt strange to Yunjin. You were so quiet, just poking at your food aimlessly. To liven up your spirits she was about to compliment your parents home until your mother finally directed her attention towards you.

“What why aren’t you eating, i cooked all this food for you and your little friends the least you can do is eat it.” Your mom stated quite abrasively.

With out lifting your head or taking a moment to breathe your responded, “ I’m not hungry”

Your mom laughed condescendingly at that, “You? Not hungry, ahh come on you use to be so big when you were younger you’d eat up everything. You afraid to blow up like that again? Actually maybe you shouldn’t eat, you don’t want to look like that again right. Oh my i remember I used to be so embarrassed taking you anywhere with me. All your cousins were so small and here you were taking up so much space. It’s good you finally stopped eating so much, you’re so pretty now too! You really take after me now ya know-“

Yunjin watched in complete horror as your mother rambled on stabbing knife after knife into your esteem with no care in the world as you just sat there taking the public embarrassment. You always stood up for the girls against the strict dietary guidelines and always reassured them how beautiful they were and yet here you were, eyes listless as you absorbed everything your mother spewed like a sponge.

“-You know i was so worried about you, especially when you use to cut yourself in highschool. I mean who does that do you know how bad that made me look and you missed so many days of school doing Lord knows what. You almost got me in trouble it was so humiliating when your teacher had to visit our home, you know everyone in the neighborhood saw that. And then you randomly wanted to go to korea to become a performer, Haha that one gave me a good laugh for the longest time but hey who knew there was actually something you were good at, i’ve been spending your monthly checks at the new med spa that opened down town-“

Yunjin felt her own tears welling up in her eyes, she wish you’d say something, she wish she could say something but she was in such shock. She grew up in a loving family, albeit they had their problems but she’s never witnessed a catastrophe of a dinner like this. She glanced back at you and reached for your hand under the table but you didn’t react at all. Until the next batch of words your mother had for you.

“ And why didn’t you tell me you were dating! I was worried you’d end up alone you know, you never brought a boy home, i mean i know you were a bit chubby but atleast one boy had to have liked you,”

“…How did you know i’m dating someone?,” You finally spoke breath caught in your throat.

“It was about a week or so ago, i ran out of the money you usually send so i was calling for more which after all i’ve done for you raising and keeping a roof over your head i don’t know why you have me on such a small stipend but anyways a man picked up. His english was a little choppy but he introduced himself as your boyfriend ha! can you believe that. I was curious how he looked so i googled his name and I have to hand it to you, i don’t know what he sees in you but make sure you keep that one, he’s one hell of a catch. I bet you havent told him about your little stunt in highschool or how huge you used to be, makes sure he never finds out or else he’s not gonna want you anymore, okay honey, men like that like their women with no baggage and i want grand babies before i die, all the nurses at the hospital are always bragging and showing pictures and i have nothing to show” your mother finally finished

You were shaking. Yunjin was holding your hand so tightly. Chaewon picked up on the unpleasant vibe but knew better than to say anything. Dinner concluded, you all thanked your parents for dinner and cleaned the table before all the members packed up in your childhood bedroom for the night. When she was sure everyone was asleep Yunjin turned to you.

“Y/n-ah I’m so s-sorry,” she weeped into your side. But you didn’t say anything, you jus hummed before turning over and going to sleep.

The next morning you all packed up to head for the airport. Yunjin overheard your mom asking for more money before giving you a hug after you wired it. She told you she loved you but you didn’t reply.

“A few weeks a-after that, “Yunjin hiccuped,” is when you barged in the dorm. A-and that night Y/n-ah finally cried and she-“ Yunjin was full on bawling , “ She was saying s-so many bad things about herself a-and i didn’t know what to s-say. I’ve never seen h-her like that.

She buried her face in her hands recollecting that night. And Mingyu… he was furious. Furious for entertaining that witch on the phone, furious for not seeing sooner how far your insecurities went, his face red in anger but also guilt for being so blind. So much made sense about you. You would never fully finish your meals, you always wore such baggy and covering clothes when not on stage, you hated when he took pictures of you and you hated smiling critiquing how your cheeks spread, you always were one to listen to others venting but never partook in your own, you always talked about dreams of the future cryptically as if you’d never be around to reach them, when he tried to be affectionate with you in public you’d always slink away from him and last and not least you pushed him away in fear of revealing the bits you so desperately wanted to hide; afraid it’d affect his perception of you.

But you were so so wrong. He needed you to understand, he saw you, his angel. Maybe it wasn’t as clear in the past but he saw you now and it changed nothing. He loved you with all his being and God he really fucking needed to see you-

“-Where is she?” He demanded determinedly already packing his cup and phone getting ready to go.

“I-I don’t know,” Yunjin answered honestly,” When we aren’t on schedule she leaves her phone at the dorm and just l-leaves-“

“ What! Do you know how dangerous that is, why hasn’t anyone stopped her!” He could feel himself falling apart, he needed to see you very badly, he needed to make sure you were okay with his own eyes, and if you weren’t he needed to make you okay somehow.

“ She always leaves at the most random times, she normally gets back in the e-evening?” Yunjin wiped her red eyes for the umpteenth time.

He didn’t know what to do, he wanted to run around Seoul like a chicken with its head cut off but he had no clue where to look. He felt like he was going to hyperventilate at this rate, he felt like such an idiot, he should’ve fought harder if only he had known how deep the hurt went. He couldn’t help but curse out loud.

“W-Wait Sunbae,” Yunjin spoke up with a revelation, “I’m checking our group chat, I-I think she might’ve taken her Apple Watch, look”

Yunjin turned her phone around showing your supposed location. He looked at the map on her phone, the glowing dot was resting in a building in Myeongdong. He quickly took a screenshot of your location, thanking Yunjin before sprinting to the company car he brought with him that afternoon. He was pretty sure he spilled some of his drink and stepped on some toes on the way to the vehicle but he couldn’t be bothered to even look back.

☆*:.｡. .｡.:*☆

To say you were surprised to receive an invitation from Nayeon of all people would be a complete understatement. You never gave her your number so it was probably received from Somi. But here you sat at a fancy restaurant awkwardly staring at each other in silence. You normally just wandered around till it got dark when there wasnt any schedules but you decided to bring your watch just in case your body goes missing. You are aware her and Mingyu broke up and you are pretty sure this invitation out wasn’t to begin a beautiful friendship with the way she was glaring at you.

“ So-“

“ I-“

You both tried talking at the same time. Cringing inwardly you bowed your head for her to take the lead.

“ You know i don’t like you right.”

Oof straight for the throat but you didn’t have much to say to that, cause you didn’t like you either.

“Yeah i figured as much,” you sipped your water, “ so why the invitation?”

“ I wanted to see for myself what’s got Mingyu so wound up,” She tilted her head scrutinizing you, “ So far i’m unimpressed.”

“ Listen if you just invited me here to take jabs at me-“

“ You’re pathetic.”

Okay that one made you roll your eyes. You gathered your purse ready to get up and leave until she continued.

“ You have an amazing man so completely enamored with your very being and yet you are stomping all over his heart. At first i thought you were just a bitch-“

You put your purse back down, uncomfortably shifting as she stared you right in your eyes.

“ I’ve been watching you ya know, you walk around like a pile of self loathing on a stick, it’s so hard to watch. I don’t know your story but I can assure you right now nothing will change how that man thinks of you. And as his friend you hurting him is a me issue now. That fool is so hard headed i’m pretty sure if i told him you murdered puppies he’d still love you” she scoffed, rolling her eyes as the waiter finally came with your appetizers.

You weren’t good at conversations like this. Well was this even a conversation moreso you were being aggressively spoken at. “Stalking is a crime you know,” you mumbled stabbing a fork into your salad.

“Is that really all you have to say? Don’t play with me, we are not friends. Do you even love Kim Mingyu?” she frankly asked with a chicken wing pointed straight at you.

“Loving him has nothing to do with-“

“ I didn’t want to have to do this but you are being so difficult,” with her clean hand she opened her phone pulling up a compromising picture of Mingyu asleep in bed with Nayeon snuggled to his side. It was clear what they finished doing before it was captured “Answer my question or i’ll keep swiping”

Your nose flared at the photo, jealousy swirled in your stomach even though you had no right. You pushed him away so you had no right to be envious but nevertheless you were. You remembered how that use to be you, losing track of what time you had to sneak back to the dorms because he was so warm and safe and so- Mingyu. Your eyes darkened as she swiped to the next photo, him sucking a hickey onto her inner thigh, looking up at her with those beautiful brown eyes. Your self esteem might’ve been in the gutter but you knew how to be shameless too.

“ Delete all of those pictures right now and I’ll answer,” you challenged staring her right back down.

She picked at some stuck chicken in her teeth with her pinky acrylic, “ Wah you’re so easy, fine fine i’m deleting them. Wasn’t that many anyways- he didn’t like me taking pics,” she mumbled the last part as she clacked away on her phone.

Once you were positive they were all gone your expression finally softened, lips parting, “I love him so much that i’m scared. I’m scared because i can take when others hurt and abandon me… but if Mingyu does… if he ever gets tired of me or casts me aside i really won’t be able to survive it. That’s the one thing i won’t be able to bounce back from. When i’m with him my heart is no longer my own and that terrifies me. Trust isn’t something that comes easy but i have no control over myself because of him. I’m used to everything blowing up in my face, always being the butt of the joke, nothing ever working out in my favor so why should i believe for once that the good that is Mingyu isn’t going to turn on me one day as well?”

“ Because it’s fucking Mingyu,” she stated matter of factly , “ Gods apology to man if you will.”

You huffed at that, finding it hard to disagree with that childish logic. After that you both jus ate in silence, probably both thinking of Mingyu to some compacity. By time the entré came out Nayeon was ready to talk again.

“ I knew he never loved me,” she sighed,” but even then he tried his hardest to. Gosh i wanna jus cry, the sex was so bomb too — i hate you so much” she pouted as she cut into her steak rather aggressively.

This time you actually laughed. A real one that touched you eyes. You held your stomach finding it hard to stop, lost in your mirth. In that moment Nayeon felt like she caught a glimpse of the Y/n he described a week ago.

You both payed for your separate meals, Nayeon left with a “I would offer you a ride but i still don’t like you” so you made your way down the street, no destination in mind, shaking your head softly at the fiasco that dinner was. You didn’t make it far before a pair of large arms wrapped around you from behind. You should’ve screamed for help if it was anyone else but you knew this embrace.

“Angel,” he whispered against your neck out of breath

“Mingyu what are you doing,”. You tugged on his arms to avail, “I was about to call the police on you, you can’t just grab people like that in- hey are you listening to me”

No he wasn’t in fact. To busy burrowing his head further in the crevice of your neck, humming softly as he pulled you flush against him. You tried to atleast to turn around in his hold but was met with a stubborn whine.

“ Mingyu, people are looking.. s-stop before someone recognizes us,” You try to shrink away from the onlookers.

He intakes your scent with a deep breathe before finding the willpower to release his limbs before dragging you to what seemed to be a parking lot. You don’t fuss much at that point letting him tug you along until you were seated and buckled safety in to his passenger seat of his car. You kept your eyes forward as he ran to his side and slid in himself. Before he moved to pull off you felt him staring shamelessly at the side of your face. Your own face starting to warm at the intensity of his gaze.

“ What is up with everyone today,” you rolled your eyes before turning in your seat to face him square on, “Care to explain to me how you knew exactly where I was? Are you stalking me too??”

His eyes were still darting around every inch of you with that silly expression on his face, “You look so nice today, did you go out to eat? Are you still hungry? What do you mean too, is someone bothering you? Also I know this nice spot by-“

You move to unbuckle your seatbelt but his hands beat you there, grabbing both your wrists in one hand. “Mingyu let me-“

“Gyu.”

“What?!” you huffed failing miserable against his hold , “ This is not the time to act cute, I’ll scream I swear I-“

This time he yanked you forward by your wrists and slot his lips against yours in a searing kiss. Instantly your body like muscle memory became liquid in his grasp no longer caring to escape him. With his free hand he held your chin between his thumb and pointer finger angling you side ways so he could eagerly push his tongue past your soft lips. He didn’t mean for things to happen in that order honestly. He wanted to make sure you were safe and okay but seeing you always scrambled his thoughts and now he’s sucking on your tongue in the parking lot getting high off your breathy moans. Lost in the nasty wet tongue kiss he subconsciously loosened the grip he had on your wrists in favor holding both sides of your face as he swirled his tongue around yours.

You cursed yourself in your head for clutching onto his tshirt pathetically as you let him defile your mouth. At the rate he was going you were gonna pass out from the lack of air and intimacy of it all. You dragged your fingertips up to the juncture of his jaw line and neck before giving a firm enough pinch. Understanding you immediately he pulled back just to give you a couple more passionate smooches, eyes low as you both watched the string of saliva slowly give way between you. It’s landed on your chin which he brazenly licked off before sucking your bottom lip into his mouth. Finally done with the impromptu makeout you both gazed at each other out of breathe, periodically looking back down at each others lips.

He caressed your cheeks with his thumb softly, something he’d been dreaming of doing again for months , “Hi” Those charming canines of his flashing at you.

You didn’t have it in you to play aloof with him in that moment, not after you jus swallowed an embarrassing amount of his spit. “Gyu how’d you find me?”

“Yunjin,” He answered quick leaning back in ready for round two, tongue already sticking out but you pushed him back by his forehead.

“ …Gyu you’ve been wanting to talk to me about the breakup since it happened right?,” you closed your eyes in defeat, some of Nayeons words urging to on, “I’m giving you the chance now, so are we gonna talk and i can’t guarantee if there will be later. I know you didn’t come all the way here just to make out. ”

“Shit fuck that’s-“ he rubbed the back of his neck in shame, “I’m sorry I just got so carried away, yes we need to talk please. Can i take you back to my place?”

You sighed but nodded turning your head to focus on the road. He quickly started up the car not wanting to ruin this chance but not before pressing a chaste kiss to the side of your forehead, hopefully you’d let that one slide just for him. You made no comment on it as he sped back to his place in silence.

Always the gentleman he kept your door on child lock so you wouldn’t get out without him opening the door for you once you reached. You couldn’t help the small smile at his childish mannerisms. Such a big baby. You allowed him to hold your hand as you both made your way to his place. Once inside you were hit with the nostalgia of his apartment, his heady scent was everywhere already making your heart race.

He locked the door behind you before getting you something to drink, “Wonwoo is out on a brand trip,” He offered once he’d heard you sit down on their couch.

You hmed at the information too busy looking all around the apartment you use to frequent. It brought back a lot of memories of the past from the chaotic cooking dates, snuggling on the living room floor staring up at the cheap star projector, to fucking like teenagers in your epic pillow fort till all the sheets collapsed around you both.

The sound of your cup of apple juice being placed down on the table took you out of your reverie as Mingyu sat down next to you. Ever the offender of having no sense of personal space, he situated him self directly against you despite the plentiful seats in the living area. You felt like you should’ve told him to move but you found yourself being honest for once; you didn’t want him to.

“So um,” he decided to break the tension, “C-can i hold your hand again while we talk?”

You relinquished your hand to him, both of you angling you bodies inwards to each other before you looked up at him waiting for him to ask his questions.

His heart compressed painfully at the sight of your big eyes but he forced himself to stay focused.

“ As i’m sure you know me and Nayeon broke up.” He waited for your acknowledgment before continuing, ” I won’t lie and say our meeting at the Somi’s party wasn’t the catalyst for alot of things but it made it clear especially despite trying to move on I physically can’t. I can’t move on from you and I don’t want to move on from you.” His thumb brushed your over knuckles, “When you broke up with me like that I wanted to be done with you, you hurt me Y/n… so so bad.”

Your eyes reflected the same glistened look as his as the guilt of carelessly casting Mingyu aside finally was catching up to you after all those months of dodging feelings. You bit your lip waiting for him to proceed.

“I just wanted to mean something to you, and when i finally was getting back to myself one look from you and back to begging on my knees like i was months ago.”

“G-gyu” you sniffled and went to cup his face in your palms. He probably didn’t even realize the single tear you were currently thumbing away at. “I- no amount of apologies will ever equate to how i treated you. But regardless I’m sorry for taking out my insecurities out on you. God knows you’ve been nothing but amazing and i still desperately tried to sabotage that all. I still think you deserve a better girl, don’t settle for me Gyu you deserve the world.”

He held onto your hands to keep your touch on him. “ I don’t care what you think i deserve, I want you. Even after everything I forgive you whether you want to be forgiven or not a-and Yunjin told me about seeing your parents-“

You sharply sucked in a breath before trying to yank your hands back to your lap but he held them firmly bringing them to his chest, “Don’t do that Y/n, don’t try to close up on me like that please. Not again, Don’t- shit angel don’t cry”

His heart broke at your vulnerable expression, lip quivering as you tried to lean away from but he wasn’t having it. He wrapped his arms around you and pulled your securely into his chest, caressing your spine while cooing into your crown.

You hiccuped uncontrollably into his chest, “ Sh-she promised she wouldn’t saying anything, she promised!”

“Please don’t blame Yunjin, I didn’t really give her choice, I just needed to know why you came back to me so closed off. Im sorry for picking up your mother’s call back then, I had no right to but Y/n don’t feel ashamed please. You are so strong, so beautiful, so worthy of everything despite what she says. My mom loves you ya know, you can share her if you’d like,” he peppered kisses across your face, “you’ll just have to marry me of course…”

You choked on a laugh between the ugly cries that wracked through you. Maybe it was the tears but your mind felt a bit lighter, “Gyu… I-I love you but i’m terrified. “ You admitted “after years of constantly being ridiculed and belittled as if im nothing i can’t help but believe it. I’m so embarrassed about having a mother like her and i’m ashamed with myself. But wh-whenever im with you i feel alive but she always finds a way to say the exact words to knock me all the way back down. For my own mother to think so lowly of me how am i s-supposed to stand proudly by your side. You are so blinding, so kind, so talented, so honest, so good; everything i’m not.”

“But to me you’re all those things and more. I’m only my best self when i’m with you, because of you. You really have no idea the power you hold not just on me but the people around you. Your mother doesn’t deserve you and she doesn’t define you. How someone can treat such a wonderful daughter like you like that still blows my mind. You deserve to be valued and praised just for existing simply because you are you. ”

By this point your foreheads were pressed together, your hiccups finally simmering down. He kissed your nose softly before wiping away your tears. “I know years of hurt can’t be done away in one night but can you promise me something Angel”

You sniffled cutely before looking up at him again , “Mmhm”

“Let me see the ugly, it’s okay if you cry, scream, yell but do it to me. Let me share your burdens, you don’t have to do it all alone. Please rely on me, it’s what i’m here for”

You wrapped your arms around him sighing into his chest. You felt so drained and lightheaded so tired but still you couldn’t deny the immense relief you felt off your heavy heart, “… You love me?” you whispered timidly.

“More than you’ll ever know,” He kissed your brow sweetly.

“Okay then… I’ll be in your care from now on” you unhurriedly pressed a kiss to his jaw before yawning,” I know there’s still so much more we have to talk about but can we talk more in the morning?”

He smiled fondly as you rubbed your eyes sleepily, nose still stuffy from your tears. He leaned down to press a proper kiss on your plush lips, “Of course my Angel,” You both gazed longing at each other a bit longer neither making the move to get up. He took the bait again and gave you a languid open mouthed kiss before whispering dreamily against your lips, “I love you.”

#mingyu x reader #mingyu #mingyu fic #mingyu angst #kpop fic #seventeen x reader #mingyu x y/n #mingyu smut #svt x reader #svt angst #kim mingyu x reader #svt fanfic #mingyu fanfic #mingyu scenarios

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st-kitten · 5 months

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WARNINGS: (m.) masturbation, nicknames (baby, babygirl, good girl, princess, pretty girl) little megumi being painstakingly adorable

life as a single father trying to make ends meet was hard for toji fushiguro. his job as a security guard for some company didn't pay much. whatever he earned went into bills, rent, and groceries, leaving next to nothing for him to save or even spend. how he wished there was a simpler way to earn. he'd be exhausted by the time he came home and crashed, only to be woken up by megumi. as much as he loved the kid, getting him ready for school and out the door was harder than an mma fight.

all the babysitters he hired were useless. most of them agreed just to get into his pants so, when they found out that they were hired 'because' he couldn't be home, they left in disappointment.

toji never relied on his neighbours either. partially because they were too old or kids themselves, with parents who also hired babysitters. the closest anyone ever came to being a candidate was his next door neighbour, you.

but he vowed to never approach you. even if it meant leaving megumi to cry midday, over a glass of spilled milk. why?

[flashback]

toji had just helped megumi catch the school bus. waving him goodbye, he went back inside the building. the days got colder each passing day, which meant that he was going to have to repair the broken heater and buy some warm clothes. how ever was he going to afford it in time?

collecting the mail, he stood in the temporary warmth of the elevator, yawning. he really wanted to go back to sleep. his work began at 10 am, so he still had two hours, maybe he could take a nap. or fix that heater himself.

he stood in front of his apartment, looking through his pockets for the keys when he heard muffled noises from the apartment next door. he had only seen you once, when he accidentally took your mail instead of his and had to give it back to you. you always seemed distant and cold, so hearing you softly, yet loudly screaming a series of "yes! yes! keep doing that!" at 8 am made him wonder what the fuck was wrong with you.

he let it slide. people had lives.

but you didn't stop there. when toji came back from his work at night, holding a bag of vegetables, he heard you again.

"oh god! yes!"

and two days later when toji brought megumi home early as he got sick in school, "just like that, baby!" he had to keep babbling random trivia to his son so that he wouldn't hear you. how many times is she going to do this?

when it was toji's day off, and he was taking a nap on the couch, he heard you moaning again. it wasn't that loud, but the single wall between your apartment and his did a terrible job at muffling it. toji was glad that megumi was at school.

[back in present time]

months had passed by and he was still not used to hearing you. he'd forgotten what you looked like, so he didn't recognise you whenever you passed by him or even when you were in the elevator with him. all he knew was that he hated you for being so disturbing.

the day he was dreading finally came when he wanted someone to look after megumi for the night as he had to cover someone's shift, and not a single person was available. with an ale tankard of reluctance, he rang the doorbell, truly expecting you to open it naked, some angry fucker peeking from behind 'cause he didn't get to finish...

so when you opened the door looking the complete opposite; wearing loose sweatpants, a barbie hoodie, house slippers and your hair tied in a messy bun, half a banana dangling in your mouth... toji held back a sigh of relief.

"hey... i'm toji, i live next door," he said, trying to sound sincere.

"i mow woo yooah," you said, chewing the banana quickly, and swallowed it.

"right... listen, i gotta cover an extra shift and i need someone to look after this brat for the night."

you held back a laugh upon hearing him refer to his son like that. you'd only seen megumi from a distance. but, you had no reason to refuse.

"sure! i'd be happy to!"

toji was still unsure about this, but there was no backing out now.

"cool. i'll send him in twenty minutes." toji vanished before you could say anything else. you chuckled to yourself. for a man of his size and built, he sure was a chicken when it came to communication.

you cleaned your living room before he could come back. your place was kid-friendly enough. you made sure you prep the kitchen in case he hadn't had dinner.

your doorbell rang and you scurried to open it.

"here's a list of things you'll have to do... he's... a little tough. but he's a good kid."

you took the list and gave it a brief look and nodded.

"alright, megs, you're gonna be staying with this lady today. i'll be back soo-"

megumi began tugging his father's pants grumpily, upset at his words.

"don't be like that, kid..." toji sighed. he didn't like to exhibit his personal life in front of others.

"please? i'll get you ice cream."

megumi's ears perked upon hearing ice cream. "chocolate?" he cooed.

"yes. now go inside."

clutching a tattered dog plushie (with two heads for some reason), he stepped inside your apartment, looking down.

toji knelt down to meet his eyes. straightening megumi's sweater, he said, "i'll be back tomorrow morning. behave, okay?" megumi nodded, almost on the verge of crying. you held back the 'awwws'.

"alright... i'm trusting you. don't f- mess it up," said toji, looking at you with a glare.

"i won't..." you just smiled solemnly. you'd say the same if you were in his position.

toji wanted to tell you to not have sex for that one night, but he chose not to add fuel to the fire. who was he to tell you not to fuck? if anything, he was mildly jealous that you got to enjoy it so much.

toji left and you turned back to megumi, who was standing in your living room, anxious to move a muscle.

you sighed. "hello, megumi. i'm y/n." you crouched down and held out your hand to him. he hesitated before holding three of your fingers and shaking them. you smiled.

"sorry about this... you don't know me at all and now you're stuck with me. must be weird."

megumi stayed silent. you got up and went to the kitchen, which was open and visible from your living room easily. you opened the fridge and pulled out a carton of chocolate milk that you'd gotten free with something.

"would you like some?" you shook the carton. megumi loved chocolate in any form. not wanting to sound too excited or desperate, he gave a curt nod. you poured him a cup of milk and handed it to him.

"you can sit down wherever you want."

megumi scanned the room and spotted a bean bag. he'd never seen one. he looked at you and then back at it.

"you wanna sit there? sure!" you placed a hand on his head and led him to the corner. you held his cup for him while he tried to sit. he immediately sank into the bean bag, hearing the sound of tiny malleable balls that shifted as he sat down. megumi's eyes widened as he tried not to bolt out of there. when he was settled down, he found it pretty comfortable. he liked how he could stretch his legs and sit at the same time.

"comfy, right?" you said, handing him his cup of chocolate milk. the way he held it with both hands made you want to scream in a pillow. no way that asscrack of a man was his father.

you went over the list once more. it was simple. bedtime was 9 PM, no allergies, likes sweet food, but easily gets a sugar rush, etc. you laughed at the numerous spelling mistakes in it.

"so, what do you like to do?" you asked, sitting down on the floor in front of him.

megumi didn't like talking to babysitters. mostly because they never paid attention to him. he didn't like how they bossed him around. or how they got mad when he asked them if they could play with him. so he would stay silent. nobody ever asked him what he liked to do, so your question caught him by surprise.

he thought about it. what did he like to do?

"paint..."

"you paint?" you asked. you always liked the idea of kids drawing and painting.

megumi nodded. he was obsessed with a box of paints his father had bought him ages ago. the paints were long dried and over. but he still dipped his brush into them, watering them and painting with whatever colour came out of it.

you didn't have paints or brushes that he could use... but an idea struck you and you wondered whether he'd like it.

"wanna paint my room?" you suddenly said.

megumi's eyes lit up with curiosity. won't your walls get damaged? what if he spilled paint on the floor? or on you?

"the walls in my room are sad and empty. i have some paint cans that the painters forgot about when i was renovating. there are some colours still left. what do you say?"

megumi nodded. you got up and went into your room, searching for a shirt you give him as overalls. you pulled out the paint cans from under your bed. you took an old shirt of yours and brought it to him in the living room.

megumi had finished drinking his milk, so he thought he'd keep the cup back. hearing you call his name startled him and he dropped the cup, watching it shatter into pieces. he tensed up and felt his eyes water. you were going to scold him, punish him, maybe even hit him. he deserved it. he broke your cup.

"oh my, are you okay?" you rushed to his side, crouching and checking him for wounds.

"sorry... sorr-" megumi tried his best not to cry. he was expecting an earful at any moment now.

"why?" it was all you asked.

megumi looked at you in shock.

"cup..."

you chuckled sympathetically. "so? cups break all the time."

"i break cup..."

you stood up, unsure of how to convince him that he did nothing wrong.

"okay... you broke the cup." there it was. you were angry. megumi was going to get scolded.

instead, he watched you pick another cup from the shelf. you took the cup, and angling it far from megumi, you threw it.

"and i broke a cup too. guess we're both clumsy..." you shrugged and picked up the pieces, swiping the rest with a broom and tossing them in the garbage.

megumi didn't know what to say. had he really done nothing wrong? it was just a cup... yeah, just a cup.

"come, let's paint my room," you held out your hand to him. slowly, he grabbed it, walking behind you towards your room. your hands were soft and warm. and you didn't pull him or drag him. instead you were walking slower just for him. why were you so kind?

you brought him to your room and asked him to help you spread newspapers on the floor. then you handed him a shirt, helping him put it on since it was huge for him. he looked like a penguin.

"megumi... please, i'll give you more chocolate milk, but can i please take your picture? you're too cute," you asked, clutching your heart.

megumi blushed and nodded, looking away.

you clicked at least twenty pictures of him in your shirt, holding a thick paintbrush, standing on newspaper barefoot. you made a mental note to send these to toji.

"alright, pick your colours."

megumi carefully scanned each colour. then he looked at you. he didn't want to mess up this opportunity. it wasn't every day that he got to paint a wall instead of paper. he wanted to make sure you'd like it.

you seemed the type of person who would appear stern, but on the inside, you were really soft and caring. like a marshmallow. he wanted the room to suit you. being the observant kid, he looked around the room and learned that you liked necklaces, most of which looked like fancy saturns (iykyk). you also liked flowers as there were vases on your nightstand, windowsill and some were on your bookshelves. you also had a lot of books. what really caught megumi's attention was that you had three guitars hung on the wall. your room was totally your personality. he knew what he wanted to paint.

megumi pointed to a few colours and you handed him a few brushes of different sizes. he dipped one in red paint and began painting a few strokes on the wall (only after glancing back at you a hundred times in case you changed your mind). you sat on the bed, watching him focus. he was definitely smarter than kids his age. you admired him.

after a while, you left the room, telling him that you were going to make dinner. curry rice got an approval from him, so you occupied yourself in the kitchen, humming to yourself. you wondered what all he had painted in your absence. you didn't really care about the wall; you only hoped he'd feel safe enough to be a child.

you finished cooking and plated the food, setting on the kitchen island you used as a dining table. you pulled a chair and stacked some couch pillows on it, increasing the height of the seat. you called to megumi, but he didn't answer.

you stepped into the room to call him for dinner again, but no words came from your mouth as you stared at your wall, awestruck.

megumi had painted so many flowers and vines that ran across your wall in different colours. he'd even mixed a few colours and created new ones. he drew the saturn orbs matching your jewellery in the center of some flowers. though he could only paint a part of it and couldn't reach higher, the wall looked full of life.

"megumi..."

he looked at you, anxious to hear what you had to say.

you stood behind him, admiring the wall.

"you made my wall magical. this is so beautiful!"

megumi had a tiny smile on his face.

"you're an artist, gumi" you said, ruffling his hair, and he blushed at the nickname you gave him. nobody ever gave him a nickname apart from his father. people would often forget his name.

he felt his chest swell with pride and happiness. he did a good job.

"let's put fairy lights on the wall!" you chirped and he nodded.

you helped him out of his shirt, tossing it into the laundry basket. you sat him down on the high chair and you both sat down for dinner. megumi liked the food. but he truly loved how you let him be himself without bossing him around. it finally dawned on him that he had broken your cup, painted your wall, and was eating your food and you had absolutely no problem with it. he felt himself breathe freely.

after dinner, he helped you clean the room and stick fairy lights all across your room. you went overboard with it, but when you switched them on and lay on the bed watching them twinkle, it felt worth it.

"we did a good job, today." you gave him a high five.

megumi yawned and you took it as a sign to prep him for bed. toji forgot to give you his toothbrush, so you tore him a new one. you wouldn't dare let a child sleep in the living room, so you tucked him in your bed. you were so glad you bought that expensive comforter because seeing megumi snuggle into it turned your eyes into beating hearts.

upon his request, you tucked in his ominous dog plushie with him and bid him goodnight. megumi fell asleep easily, snoring softly. you made rounds to the room to check on him and felt your heart melt every time. he was definitely an active sleeper. his positions would get bizarre every time and you'd pull the comforter on him properly each time.

you finally slept on your couch around midnight.

toji didn't sleep a wink. the world's most boring job had him awake all night, opening gates for rich snobs who partied and returned to the semi-residential building at odd hours.

the only thing on his mind was megumi. he prayed that you weren't fucking someone with him in the house. he wondered if he'd eaten. he wondered if he was asleep right now. he hoped you gave him his demon dog to sleep with.

when dawn broke, he was out of there. he drove his dying truck straight to the parking and dashed out of the car. he decided to grab his and your mail, just so he'd have an extra excuse to knock on your door.

he didn't bother asking you for a key. he just yanked open the letterbox and it easily came into his hand. he grabbed whatever was in it.

"did you hear apartment 707? so loud.... that too in the morning"

"how could i not? but, im not surprised..."

toji heard two ladies gossip, waiting for the elevator. 707... his apartment was 706, so it had to be you. he was going to murder you.

he sped in and out of the elevator, rushing to your place. expecting to hear the sound of sex, he stopped in his tracks... you were not having sex? your door was conveniently ajar and toji spotted a few empty cans of paint outside.

he opened the door, peeking in, only to see... his adorable five year old son, jumping around and dancing with you to a christmas song, decorating a large tree in your living room. (christmas tree farm by the one and only... blondie)

if toji could explain how much he wanted to giggle at the sight, he would. but he only watched the two of you, leaning against the doorframe, hands folded, a small smirk tugging at his lips.

"where every wish comes true!!!" you sang, hanging the ornaments miscellaneously. megumi poked your leg and you picked him up, helping him tie a bell around a branch.

you swayed and danced to the beat with megumi on your shoulders, who laughed loudly.

toji felt his heart melt upon hearing his son laugh. he hadn't heard that sound in a long time.

he looked around and spotted a plate of half-eaten pancakes and glasses of milk. did you drink milk with him? he held back a laugh.

as you turned around, you spotted toji and nearly threw yourself in the tree.

"dad!" megumi chirped, happy to see his father. toji took it as an invitation to come inside. seeing megumi almost as tall as him, he chuckled and looked him in the eye.

"here's your ice cream, stinky," he said, holding a bag full of ice cream cups.

megumi giggled.

toji smiled widely and you sobbed at how cute the kid was. you placed him down and he ran to his father, clinging to his knee. you took the ice cream bag from toji and placed it on the kitchen counter taking the contents out.

[next song: under the tree by sam palladio]

you handed megumi a cup of chocolate ice cream and the uselessly small wooden spoon that came with it.

"which one do you want?" you asked toji who had yawned at least a dozen times by now.

"anything is fine."

you tossed him the pinkest strawberry ice cream cup. he rolled his eyes, but began eating it anyway. you sat next to him on the couch. megumi insisted on sitting under the tree, on the tree-skirt, looking up at the lights and the ornaments from below.

"oh! look!" you said, pulling your phone out to show toji pictures of little megumi in an oversized shirt holding a paintbrush.

"what's this?" toji asked. though his kid looked cute, he still didn't know what happened when he was away.

"yeah, he painted my wall," you replied.

"HE WHAT?" toji asked, surprised. megumi never misbehaved. but i guess he finally snapped.

"yeah! it's so beautiful, i can't stop staring at it," you began mumbling.

this kid ruined your walls and you're happy about it? he thought you'd scold him.

"come, i'll show you," you signalled him to follow you and toji did, worried about the mess his son had made.

he also did not want to see your room, given that he'd heard you have sex plenty of times for it to etch in his mind like a song that just doesn't fucking leave.

he was not expecting for your room to be so... pleasant and unsuspecting. you had a queen-sized bed with fluffy pillows, plants in the room, some equipment on the desk. hell, instead of sex, it smelled like coconut.

you showed him the art megumi had blessed your wall with.

"he's great at painting!"

toji's eyes widened at the intricate designs on the wall. had megumi really painted this? was he this good at it?

"it's... good..." toji didn't know what to say. he felt really sad that his son was capable of something so great and yet toji couldn't do more for him.

you smiled, somehow understanding what he was feeling. it was the same thing you felt about yourself when you realised your love for music.

toji asked you to send him the pictures and you complied. he looked around your room in silence, not knowing what to do. but he decided to address the former elephant in the room.

"can i ask you something?"

"sure," you said, looking down at your phone.

"i don't have the right to pry in your personal life, but... next time you have someone over, keep it down? i don't want megumi to hear... that..."

"huh?"

"you know... what you and your boyfriend do..."

"i don't have one?"

"then whoever you bring home to fuck... just please, keep the volume low," said toji impatiently.

"i didn't bring any... oh, you heard that!" you said as it dawned on you.

"yeah, whatever that is..." toji wanted to hide his face. it felt like giving a child 'the talk'. and you weren't that old too...

"toji..." you called, holding back your laugh. he wondered what was so funny.

"i'm not having sex in here. what you've been hearing..." you almost held it back... "was me recording for quinn."

"huh?"

you sighed as you explained, "it's an app for people who like listening to spicy stories... i'm one of their narrators... i try to pick times when people are busy or not here... but oh my god, i'm so sorry you had to hear that..." you said with a laugh, grabbing his arm apologetically.

toji digested every word you said.

"why on earth would you do that?"

"it pays really well, you know..." you shrugged.

now you had toji's attention. "you get paid for speaking dirty?" he asked, genuinely curious.

"and narrating, reading lines, moaning, whimpering, shouting... the works."

"that's an odd job..." he commented. it truly was. he had no idea things like these existed.

"i'm a singer by profession, so this is just a side hustle. my room is soundproof so i can't hear outside noises, but sadly..."

"you're not ashamed?"

"why would i be? it's great that people like it. you should try listening to some."

"please, no," toji held his palm out to her. he heard you chuckle. "aren't you worried that people might find out about you?"

"of course i don't use my real name."

toji shook his head in disbelief.

"i know you're ancient, but try it someday. who knows, you might end up liking it," you said, showing him the app on your phone.

toji stared at you with a blank face. he wasn't that behind the times, was he? he snuck a glance at your screen, his eyes falling on your username in a corner. embarrassed, he swatted your hand away and you chucked.

"anyway, thanks for looking after my kid." toji got up and left your room as you trotted behind him.

"anytime!"

toji left with megumi, after thanking you once more and making his kid to the same. megumi had definitely enjoyed he spent with you. he wished he could do it again.

a few days passed by and megumi started to become more interactive with you, waving at you, telling about his day when you rode the elevator together, giving you some small sketches he made after you gave him a sketchbook and some colour pencils.

toji still hadn't warmed up to you, but he wasn't as dismissive as he used to be. in fact, he had gotten slightly curious about you. you lived a quiet life, or so it seemed on the outside. but he knew what you did and how unbothered you were about it.

why would people pay to listen to strangers moaning? it seemed bizarre to him. he tried to ignore it.

he was stuck on another night shift, leaving megumi with you. he was glad that his son didn't mind you. and you'd proven to be a capable babysitter. yet, all he wanted was to be near his son. home. the night couldn't get over any sooner.

toji sat in the booth provided to him, watching the streets. nights when people came and went by were just as boring as when nobody showed up. he contemplated taking a nap, but the last thing he wanted was to be fired for slacking off. especially when the night shift paid him a bit more.

he turned side to side in the swivel chair, groaning in frustration. so far, he'd watched eight mma matches on his phone, cussing at how pathetic they were. nothing entertained him enough to keep him awake.

that thing embedded in his subconscious mind suddenly resurfaced, making him gulp in guilt. he could do it. it's not like she'll know... as if he was being watched, toji switched the light off in his booth and discreetly took his phone out, lowering the brightness and pulling out a tangled pair of earphones, and plugged them in. he downloaded that app, signing in with a random email he'd created ages ago.

[mention; compromised: victoria pedretti, on quinn]

he remembered her username and typed it in. not wanting to dwell too much on it, he clicked on the first 'story' he saw. he didn't read the description. he had no idea what he was to expect. thankfully, the audio started with some context. he instantly recognised your voice. based on what he understood in the first few minutes of the introductory chapter, it was a story about an agent watching over the witness she was supposed to protect. he realised that it was a woman x woman story. not that he minded. he just enjoyed listening to your voice. you surely had a singer's voice.

the more he listened, the more engrossed he was in the plot.

"i can stay on the line, sure..." you said, as your character stood below a hotel, at a distance, watching the woman you were on the phone with, from the window, keeping an eye out.

"you're not wearing anything underneath... i might not be the only person watching, you know," you chuckled. your laugh sounded better all over, probably due to the recording quality. toji paid attention to everything he heard.

"...tell me where you're touching...does it feel good?"

"i wanna see your other hand on your breast..."

"do you want me in that room?" your voice was laced with quick breaths...

"now i'm gonna hang up...no, not to touch myself... I don't care that you're close!"

toji sighed in exasperation, truly engrossed in the story.

"wait, shit, there is a man... fuck i think he's armed..."

toji had never clicked on 'next' that fast in his life. okay, he was hooked. when he first heard about this from you, he thought it was just audio-porn. he didn't expect a full on story with a plot, internal monologue, the background noises. it was as if it was happening around him.

the next chapter had you grunt and scream as you fought some attacker. how on earth did she record this shit? was she also fighting in the apartment? he smirked, realising what a double life she was leading.

"i saw that smirk, don't get any ideas..." you said coincidentally and toji had to look around him for a moment.

"you're very, very distracting..." your voice seemed closer whenever the background music got fainter. maybe it was the mic or some technical tweaking. but it really sounded like you were speaking in his ear.

your pants were now mixed with small laughs. it sounded blissful.

"don't ever be sorry for kissing me..." toji was surprisingly okay with hearing sounds of you kissing, probably another woman.

"oh, these lips... can i? touch them? fuck..." you moaned slightly... and then laughed. "did you just bite my thumb? you're so bad... i might have to punish you."

toji had to grasp his phone tightly as heard you make out, hearing your breaths mingled with the sounds of your lips moving against someone else's. you sounded so different, so confident.

"you like that, don't you? me on my knees... touching you, licking you, tasting you..."

fuck

toji knew you were saying this to a woman, but he couldn't help picturing himself in her place. your hums, whimpers, breaths, they were all elevating his senses. he felt his pants tighten.

"yes, fuck..."

"i love your neck..." you panted. toji raised his head, gulping.

"you're so hot... fuck... me..." your moans had started to get louder, breathier.

"what if i don't wanna hurry? what if... i wanna make you beg for it?" toji instinctively let his hand wander down his body, to his pants. he loosened his belt. he slid his pants and boxers down just enough for his dick to spring out, harder than he expected it to be. your constant moans, whimpers and dirty words became music to his ears as he stroked his cock slowly.

"tell me how good it feels..."

toji groaned, quickening his speed, his eyes closed, his mind visualising your face. he imagined you doing everything he heard you do on the phone. touching him, licking him, tasting him... he fisted his cock to the sounds of your sweet voice, shamelessly.

"so good..." he hissed, as if to answer you, gliding his fist up and down his thick veiny cock, its tip glistening proudly.

"come for me, yes! yes! yes! fuuuuck..." you moan loudly, dragging the last word, breathing shakily.

"god..." toji gave up any restraint he had and let his cock burst like a dam, spoiling his pants.

he was high. high on your voice, your moans, your words. he wished he could experience it for the first time again.

a shrieking honk from the gate snapped toji back into reality. he zipped back up in a hurry, shoving his half-hard cock in his pants. he tied a jacket around his waist to hide it and scurried out of the booth to open the gate.

toji came home early in the morning, feeling floaty. he couldn't forget last night's events. not when you were right there. next door. probably recording the next one. toji didn't know how he was to face you, but he was damn sure about hearing you again.

and hear you he did. for days. he was finding the plot interesting too. but he was addicted to your voice. how were you so confident? how did you manage to record the perfect moans. did you have help? did you get off just to get a good audio? all these questions plagued toji's mind. he really wanted to ask you about it.

but how was he to do it without sounding like a creep? or worse, a pervert? but then again, you did till him about it yourself.

so, when he had to collect megumi from your house after coming back, he came up with the simplest excuse.

"see you later, gumi!" you ruffled his hair, watching him run to his father, who told him to go inside and wait for him.

before you could shut the door, he shoved his foot inside. "hey, uh... i had a question."

"come in..." you moved aside.

you were hungry, but didn't have the time to buy groceries. so, instant ramen it was...

toji followed you to the kitchen, rehearsing the imminent conversation in his head.

"what's wrong?" you asked, looking at his tensed brow.

"i'm a little starved for cash. megumi's birthday is coming and i want to give that urchin something good this time."

"awww..."

"you uh..." was he really going to ask that? would she even listen? "you were talking about that..."

you on the other hand, knew exactly what he wanted to talk about. so many of your friends had tried to do that same. the fact that toji was considering doing that made the composer in you mildly excited.

"you want to earn cash on quinn, am i right?"

toji's head shot up, looking at you, slightly horrified and ready to get his ass kicked out the door.

"alright."

"wait, what?"

"i'll help you... sell your voice."

"are you serious?"

"do i look like i'm joking?"

"would i even... be able to... you know..."

you leaned on the kitchen island, looking at toji, who had sat down in a chair across from you.

"just do it..."

"you expect me to do it just like that?" he asked.

"what, like it's hard?" you snorted.

toji just looked at you blankly. "you mean, you do it just like that?"

"women are expert at faking it, you know?" you smirked.

toji scoffed in disbelief, rolling his eyes.

wickedly, you began panting, whimpering, opening your mouth as lewd moans spilled out of you. you gripped the edge of the kitchen island, and whined, "yes! toji! just like that!"

toji felt like he'd been shot in the head... both, his heads... he felt a bulge in his pants. hearing you moan and actually seeing you moan were two different things. the way your eyes shut tight, brow creased, mouth opened and chest heaved, toji couldn't take his eyes of you.

you saw his reaction through squinted eyes and stopped, reverting to your normal self, scratching the back of your head, completely unbothered.

"so yes, toji... just like that..." you said, without the moans this time.

toji gulped.

"so, do you wanna record a demo? i can send it to my agent. if she likes it, she'll ask you to record a proper script."

toji sighed... what was he getting into? he didn't actually imagine himself doing it. would it be embarrassing? no, fuck it. he could really use the extra cash.

"no one can know," he said sternly.

"you can use a pseudonym. you can literally put an emoji as your name."

"whatever. as long as nobody can trace it back to me."

"i guarantee you they won't. let's send an anonymous demo, 'kay?"

"fine. but, i don't know how to do this shit. it's too... fucking dumb."

you chuckled. "it is. dumb and fun. but doesn't it make you feel... like a king, knowing that the world gets off to your voice?"

toji scoffed and smirked. oh, how he wished she knew that he had been getting off to her voice nearly every damn night, palming his dick, picturing you saying all those dirty things to him.

he followed you to your bedroom where you had set up your mic, your laptop, you desk, under a labyrinth of wires and cables. he was made to sit in the chair facing the mic. the fuck am i doing...

you tapped on your laptop, leaning forward on the desk. toji's hammering anxiety took a break when he realised how close you were. your tits were practically in his face. he'd only ever seen you in baggy clothing, so this was a pleasant surprise. they were big. but they'd easily fit in his hands. he was a little disgusted by the fact that he was severely attracted to you.

"okay... what would you like to say?"

"i don't know..."

"what are your go-to swear words?"

"uh... fuck?"

"and?"

"i don't swear because of my kid... so, i don't know... this is difficult, y/n..."

"what do you have to fear?"

she was right. what was he to lose? to fear? nothing. he knew how hot was. he knew ladies threw themselves at him. he knew his sex appeal was impeccable. so then why was this so difficult?

oh, he knew why. you. it was because of you. the way he'd listened to your moans all week, stealing glances at you whenever he saw you, and now that he was in your bedroom with you...

fuck that! this bitch just faked an orgasm in front of me without a problem. i can at least spit out a few sentences.

"how do you start?"

"well, i usually have a script and there's good enough build up."

"so, give me one of your scripts."

"really? you wanna say, 'touch my pussy'?"

"fuck no. ugh, this is frustrating," he groaned loudly, leaning back and running his hands through his hair.

"hey, wait, that's good!"

"huh?"

"say it again."

"this... is frustrating?"

"tojiiiii," you rolled your eyes and smacked his arm. "say it like you did before. with the groan and all."

"i can't just do it on command."

"do you want me to leave you here alone with a gravure magazine then?"

toji's narrowed his eyes at her. "you read those?"

"no, but, you get the point."

toji sighed. you thought of another way to get him riled up. if a sexy audio wasn't gonna happen, then an angry one it was... there were plenty of angsty stories in demand. you clicked on record without him knowing.

"stop acting like a virgin, toji," you said and he shot you a glare. you let your mouth run a marathon, "no, for real, you're a grown ass man with a nice, deep voice. you look like you'd be pissed off if someone so much as looks at you wrong. or worse, if someone tries to mess with your son-"

"watch your mouth," toji growled, grabbing your jaw with his fingers, pressing it tightly.

"or what?"

"or you regret ever letting me in this house. that kid fucking loves you. you keep him out of this. do not... ever use him... to use me," he snarled.

you pressed the spacebar to stop recording. toji pulled his hand back, putting two and two together.

"that... was something."

"i mean it."

"sorry... but damn, angry toji... is sexy..." you commented.

"yeah? you like that?" toji said with a smirk. you squealed, regretting not recording that.

"SAY THAT AGAIN." you began recording again.

toji let out a deep chuckle. "you want me to say that again, pretty girl?" oh, he was starting to get into it.

you nodded.

"beg for it..." toji whispered, slightly closer to the mic. he watched you hold back another squeal.

"use your words, baby."

you were almost jumping up and down at how good he sounded. you really wanted to use his voice. you figured your agent would ignore yours and focus on his.

you exhaled, "please, please say it again!"

"hmm..." toji's baritone voice reverberated in the mic. "that doesn't sound so convincing, princess..."

you banged the air above the desk, pursing your lips and grinned.

"please please please! i'll do anything!"

oh, toji was starting to see the fun in it. "anything, you say..."

"yes! whatever you say!" you too were blending well with him.

"get on your knees, then baby..." he said brusquely.

your jaw dropped, morphing into a wide smile as you silently cheered him. toji found your reactions entertaining. true, you'd been doing this longer than him, so you were probably used to hearing all that. you were genuinely enjoying him.

you gave him a thumbs up and he made his closing statement, making sure to murmur, "good girl..."

you stopped recording and grabbed toji by his shoulders, shaking him. "AAARRRRGGGH. you are a natural!!!!!"

toji smirked. that was oddly easy to do. mostly because you helped him into it.

"well, i'm not one to brag..."

"no, please brag."

"heh. do you think your agent will like it?"

"she will eat it. she will want to become it."

"how much do you make exactly?" he asked.

"i had to do a lot of small freebies until i got my big break. i made [good amount] per episode. i've done three stories, each with twelve chapters. im working on a fourth one... so it's incomplete."

that must have been the one toji had listened to the first time. he did click the first thing he saw. he'd been replaying the first three episodes over and over, coming undone to them. but now that you'd said there were more...

"that's actually very..."

"rich, right? i was surprised too."

"so, you're gonna send it to your agent now?"

"yep. she'll like it. under what name do you want it?"

toji thought about it. he couldn't have this traced back to him. not with megumi's life at risk. it had to be something entirely random. yet meaningful...

"how about... 707?"

you grinned. that was a smart pseudonym. "done."

"well... tell me how it goes. and once again... not a word about this in public. what happens in this room, stays in this room," he warned you.

"WAIT SAY THAT AGAIN!"

toji chuckled as he stood up to leave and rejoin his son. before he did, he inched closer to you and whispered in your ear, "beg for it, babygirl."

you groaned and flapped your hands, fanning yourself. "you're so good at this!"

you'd sent that clip to your agent and got a response from her a few days later. to say the least, you were surprised by her request.

so, you stood at toji's door, phone in hand. he opened it.

"'sup?"

"it's my agent."

toji shut the door behind him, not wanting megumi to hear anything.

"what'd she say?"

you simply held out your phone and the text she sent you.

'WHO IS THAT?' 'GIRL LOCK THAT MAN IN THE BASEMENT' 'he's got the job if he wants it. i just got a killer script! the only condition is'

toji raised an eyebrow at the last message.

'you both have to do it together'

#toji fushiguro #toji #fushiguro #toji x reader #toji x y/n #toji fushiguro x reader #toji fushiguro x y/n #smut #megumi #Quinn #spicy #neighbours #asmr

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supernovafics · 6 months

Note

Hi I was wondering if you could do a next part for just a feeling where reader does let it show that she doesn't feel comfortable about vanessa and steve and that she's jealous and you could add whatever else you'd like but also if you could include steve canceling the date with Vanessa (him not gonna see her again/anymore)

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅𝐈𝐑𝐒𝐓 𝐅𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐎𝐅 𝐒𝐍𝐎𝐖

"i'll be there for you" universe masterlist

pairing: bestfriend!roommate!steve harrington x fem!reader

word count: 3.3k words

warnings: explicit language, (slightly)jealous!reader, smoking weed (reader and steve), some angst

summary: in which the kids stay over at your and steve’s apartment for the night. when it’s long after midnight and the kids are asleep in the living room, you find steve sitting out on the fire escape. a late night conversation full of honesty ensues, and it manages to bring up more questions than answers

author's note: thank uu for the request !! i was already in the middle of working on this when i got it lol so some stuff is a lil different. hope you enjoy though🫶🏾

general note: everything in this universe/series can be read as standalone oneshots but to understand the full “lore” it would prob be best to read the other stuff too<333

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Winter 1985

Somehow in the five months of you and Steve living in your apartment, a sort of “tradition” quickly managed to form where once a month the kids would stay over for a night.

They’d set up camp in the living room; Max and El always got the couch, while the boys spread out their sleeping bags on the floor.

It was a proper sleepover, and why it was happening at your apartment instead of at any of their homes still confused you and Steve a little, but neither of you really minded; you both really enjoyed spending time with the group of teens.

Tonight was a little different, though. While you and the kids were playing a particularly heated game of Uno circled around the coffee table, Steve was out on a date. With Vanessa.

It was only their third date, but those always felt pretty defining to you, and at this point you were just waiting for him to tell you that things were serious with her, or getting there.

Steve hadn’t really talked about her that much to you, and you couldn’t help but wonder if that was more your fault or his. You definitely hadn’t been as adamant with asking questions about how things were going as you’d been with other girls he had gone on dates with.

Vanessa was in one of your classes and over the last few weeks she told you more than enough about her and Steve, even though you never asked; how great their first date getting dinner at some restaurant had gone, their second date to the movies, and their long phone conversations that would happen practically every other night.

You did not need to hear all of that from him too.

But still, you expected him to tell you something about what was going on with him and her.

If you were going to solely take Vanessa’s words for how things were going, which you kind of were since she was the only one you heard anything from, you would believe that everything was sunshine and daisies between them, and it was only a matter of time before he was telling you that he had a girlfriend.

The last time the two of you had a conversation like that was when he told you about Nancy. It was only two years ago, but it somehow felt like so much longer. That conversation— which happened one night at Steve’s house; his parents were gone like usual and yours were too busy to ever notice you sneaking out and biking twenty minutes to his house almost every night— went perfectly fine because you were getting into your own relationship then too, so the timing felt ideal to say the least.

If only things could be that serendipitous this time around.

Because you weren’t sure you’d be as excited when he told you now. Not when you could barely remember the last time you went on a good date, and you hadn’t even managed to find anyone to simply have a crush on lately.

Other than the fact that you had hated most of your classes this semester, you were glad that it had finally ended yesterday because it also meant that you’d, hopefully, see completely new people in your classes next year.

If Steve was about to get into something serious, maybe you could too.

It still didn’t fully make sense to you why you felt so affected by it this time around; why you were still feeling jealous for reasons that felt simultaneously stupid and completely valid.

You figured that ultimately you just didn’t want things to change.

“Your turn,” Dustin said, bumping your arm and pulling you out of your thoughts.

“Oh, my bad,” You responded as you placed down a card and then El went.

“What were you thinking about?” Lucas asked.

“Um, nothing, really.” You shrugged. “Just school stuff.”

“How is college?” Will asked. “I think you’re the only person we know that’s in it right now.”

You thought about your answer for a moment. “In order to make sure you guys stay inspired and excited to go to college in four years, I will respectfully decline to answer that question.”

Max laughed a bit. “So, what you're saying is, it sucks.”

“Technically, I didn’t explicitly say that. So none of your parents can hate me or call me a shitty influence,” You responded. “Anyway, though, are you guys hungry? I should probably order the pizza now.”

“Great subject change,” Mike said with a laugh.

“Thank you,” You smiled as you got up from your spot on the arm of the couch, which had been entirely uncomfortable but worth it so that the kids were comfortable. “You guys can skip my turn for now. And I will be taking my cards with me because I don’t trust any of you to not look at them while I’m gone.”

“Good choice,” You heard Dustin say as you walked toward the phone in the kitchen.

You ordered three pizzas— a pepperoni, cheese, and one that was half of each— from the place that you and Steve would always go to that was only five minutes away. You were saying a quick, “Got it, thanks,” to the guy on the other end of the line who had just told you that the pizza should be delivered in about thirty minutes, when the squeaky front door opened and in walked Steve. The kids’ chorus of Hi’s and Hey’s were immediate and Steve smiled back at them and said a quick “Hi” of his own before heading into his room.

That very short interaction gave you no indication on how the date went; if Steve seemd happier than when he had left earlier that evening or if he was the same. But, you wanted to know what happened tonight. You felt like you needed to know, and surprisingly you actually wanted to ask him. If something big had happened, you knew that he would have to tell you sooner rather than later, but you’d rather just get it out of him now.

Maximizing on that small surge of courage, you gave his door a quick courtesy knock before walking in and closing it behind you.

“Hey,” You said as you sat down on his bed. “How was your date?”

He was pulling off the blue short sleeve Polo he had on and slipped on a T-shirt that you immediately recognized because you had gotten it for him a couple Christmases ago. It was a dark green shirt that had a tree and a bear on it and said “Yosemite National Park” across the top. You found it at a thrift shop and thought it was cool even though neither of you had been to that park or even to California.

Steve met your curious gaze. “Long story short, we won’t be seeing each other again.”

“Oh,” Was all you could say at first because hearing that answer completely confused you. You also felt like a complete asshole for immediately feeling relieved by his words. “Oh, um, okay… Can I have the long version of the story?”

“Maybe later,” Steve said, and for the first time in a long time, it was actually hard to read your best friend right then. He didn’t look sad, but there was something about his words that kind of felt sad. “I’d much rather just play Uno with you guys right now.”

“Okay,” You said with a nod. You were still so curious about everything— your mind was already cooking up a plethora of potential scenarios of what could’ve happened between him and Vanessa tonight. But, you decided not to push him further on it right then. “I hope you’re also in the mood for pizza and watching Ghostbusters. It was pretty much a unanimous decision by the kids.”

He smiled at that. “That’s honestly not surprising.”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

You weren’t entirely sure why you couldn’t sleep.

It wasn’t because of the kids making noise, like what would usually happen, because they all knocked out around midnight; right after raiding the freezer and eating pretty much all of the ice cream you and Steve had in there.

Maybe you were hungry again. You didn’t really think that was it, but you’d rather just go with that thought process than continue to lay restlessly in your bed.

You got out of it and wrapped the throw blanket that sat folded across your desk chair around you before walking out of your room. You tiptoed around the boys and their sleeping bags scattered around the living room and headed to the kitchen counter where the pizza boxes were; you hoped there was a stray slice in at least one of them.

Before you checked any of the boxes, something outside the large window that led to the fire escape managed to catch your eye. The Christmas lights that you and Steve strung up a week ago around the railing of the fire escape were shining brightly like they did every night. But, unlike every night, right then, Steve was out there sitting on the old metal stairs.

Your eyebrows furrowed as you went over to the window, once again maneuvering around the kids and their sleeping bags, and then opening it wide enough so that you could step out onto the fire escape. When you smelled what exactly was happening out there, you quickly closed the window behind you.

“I feel very offended that you didn’t bring me out here for this,” You said to Steve, eyeing the joint between his fingers as you sat down next to him. After immediately getting hit by the cold night air, you were glad that you had a blanket wrapped around you, and you gave some of it to Steve.

“I didn’t wanna wake you,” He said, grabbing the end part of the blanket that you slung around his shoulders and adjusting it.

“You can always wake me up for this,” You told him as you pushed yourself even closer to him so that you both were nicely huddled within the throw blanket. “And for anything, really.”

He smiled at you. “So, whenever I find a spider in my room, I can wake you up to kill it for me?”

“I’m not even going to dignify that question with an answer because you already know that Eddie is our designated bug murderer,” You told him with a small smile before taking the joint from him and bringing it to your lips.

Things became quiet aside from the random street noise below, and it stayed like that for a bit. It was freezing out, and the thin blanket actually wasn’t providing a lot of warmth, but you didn’t mind the goosebumps starting to rise on your skin right then, especially your bare legs.

You turned your head a little to look at Steve. “Can I finally get the full story now of what happened tonight, or do I still have to live in suspense?”

At first, he didn’t say anything, and you almost thought that he still wasn’t going to tell you everything. But then he took a quick drag of the joint and then started speaking. “We got takeout from this burger place that she likes and then went back to her apartment to watch a movie. After the movie we were talking and she asked if I thought that what we’ve been doing could lead to something serious because that’s something that she wants right now. And I told her that I’m not looking for something serious right now, so she said that we shouldn’t see each other anymore.”

You weren’t sure what you thought Steve was going to say, but it wasn’t necessarily that. It didn’t sound like the dramatic and abrupt ending that a part of you expected to hear about. The way things ended between them made sense to you— they wanted different things. In your head, that was probably the most civil way things could end between two people.

“Oh, okay,” You said with a nod. “You seemed so weird earlier, like kinda sad, so I fully thought you were going to tell me something really bad happened. But, that doesn’t sound too bad.”

Steve looked away from you then. “It’s just… I kinda feel like shit about lying to her, though.”

Your eyebrows furrowed as you passed the joint back to him. “What did you lie about?”

He was quiet for a long moment and you wished that he was looking at you so you could read his face. “For the most part, I do want something serious. But, I just couldn’t really… see that with Vanessa. I couldn’t picture any sort of a “future” with her.”

“Oh,” You breathed out. You fully didn’t expect to hear him say that, and it was easy to tell how bad he felt about that brutal honesty. “Don’t feel like shit. It’s good that you lied.” You lightly bumped your knee with his so that his eyes met yours again. “If you had told Vanessa that you do want something serious with someone but that someone��s not her, it would’ve just hurt her more.”

“I just don’t get why I couldn’t see it, y’know. And that’s the most confusing part about everything,” He said with a shake of his head, and it was you that felt the need to break the eye contact this time around. “She’s great and things were going really good. Us being together and having something serious would’ve made sense.”

“I think that sometimes the stuff that feels like it should make sense just doesn’t end up feeling right,” You said, your gaze solely focused on a car driving below and you couldn’t help but wonder what the driver was up to this late at night, or early in the morning, depending on how one looked at it. “And I know that was probably the most cryptic and fortune cookie kind of answer, so I’m sorry.”

He laughed a bit. “No, I think I understand what you mean. Kinda.”

You gave him a small smile as he gave you back the joint. You took a slow drag from it and then exhaled out into the freezing Winter air.

You weren’t entirely sure how much time had passed over the next few moments. All you knew was that you were nicely high, and all too quickly the cold didn’t bother you so much anymore because of that, and you suddenly felt the need to let out your own version of brutal honesty.

You closed your eyes and then let out a breath. “I’m sorry.”

Steve’s eyebrows furrowed at your words. “For what?”

“That your date went bad. That I’m kind of relieved that it did.”

You knew that you would’ve told him that eventually. It was hard keeping secrets from him, it had especially been hard not telling him how you’d been feeling the past few weeks. And it felt easier to say it all now because your mind was a little fuzzy and felt a lot less chaotic.

Steve was quiet for a second, letting your words linger in the air as he took another drag. “Why are you relieved?”

You sighed, already knowing that your next words would be somewhat of a lie. “I don’t know…”

He lightly bumped your knee. “That’s not true.”

“I was kind of jealous and really annoyed about you going out with Vanessa,” You said and then sighed again. “Because… It’s just… Things are so much easier when it’s just me and you, I think. When neither of us are in relationships.” Your eyes were still closed and you were leaning your head against Steve’s shoulder as you spoke. “And I know we both want to find someone, and eventually have something serious and long-term and whatever. But, that doesn’t change the fact that when it’s just you and me… it’s really fucking nice.”

“I agree. Completely,” He said, voice soft.

The sigh you let out that time was one of relief. “Good. It’s nice to know that we’re both selfish and clingy in this friendship and just wanna keep each other for ourselves.”

You were only slightly joking with your words.

“In that case,” Steve started. “Maybe we should just date then.”

You let out a giggle as you finally opened your eyes and lifted your head before taking what was left of the joint away from him. “Okay, and I think that’s enough weed for you tonight. I think it just killed all of your most important brain cells.”

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding,” He told you and poked your side, which only made you laugh harder. “But, you’ve never thought about it before? Not once?”

“When I’m drunk and high, yes. At least, I think I do. Most of the time I can’t fully remember,” You answered, your giggles finally subsiding. “But, when I’m sober, no. I never think about it.”

Steve laughed at that.

“What?” You asked as you placed the small bit of what was left of the joint on the ledge of the window.

“I think I’m the same way. I only think about it when I’m so fucking drunk, or high like right now.”

You thought about his words for a second. They felt funny to you just like he thought, but they also felt like something different too.

“Is it weird that we do that?”

His gaze left yours for a moment. “I don’t know. Probably. Maybe.”

Maybe you two should’ve talked about it more; what that all meant, if anything. But you didn’t say anything else because it was easier to just convince yourself that all of what was said just then meant nothing, instead of even thinking about the slim possibility that maybe just maybe it could actually mean something.

So, you kept your mouth shut instead of asking a potentially friendship altering question, and you hoped to God and the universe and whatever else was out there that you wouldn’t be able to recall this part of the conversation in the morning.

“It’s snowing,” Steve said, and you were so grateful for the abrupt subject change because of his observation right then, and you hadn’t even noticed that it was snowing until he mentioned it.

It already seemed to be coming down a fair amount and you smiled at how pretty it looked. You had always loved snow, and you especially loved it even more after you met Steve because you then finally had someone to have snowball fights and build snowmen with.

You wiped away a snowflake that landed on your cheek. “The first fall of snow on the first day of Winter. How poetic?”

“Very,” Steve nodded. “Hopefully it’s not too bad by the morning. The kids will be annoyed if they can’t go to the diner for breakfast. And then we’ll sadly get stuck with having to cook them something.”

“Do you think that they just use us for free food and rides?”

“Oh, yeah, definitely,” He didn’t hesitate to answer. “Wanna go inside? I think the cold is making my high wear off too fast.”

“I would say yes, but I think my ass is now permanently frozen to this stair.”

Steve looked down. “Woah, shit, I didn’t even notice you were wearing shorts.”

“Wow, such a bad friend. You didn’t notice my suffering?” You said sarcastically with an overdramatic shake of your head. “And to think that I came out here to be a great friend and make sure you were okay and not wallowing out here alone. I even let you use some of my blanket.”

Steve laughed at your dramatics as he shrugged the blanket off of his shoulders and fully wrapped it around you instead. “Come on, let’s go inside. You can use the heated blanket that my mom got me last Christmas, if you want.”

“Aw, maybe you are a good friend,” You said jokingly.

He playfully rolled his eyes at you and stood up. “I just know that if you get sick, I’ll never hear the end of it.”

You smiled at him as he started pushing up the window. “You know me so well.”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

let me know ur thoughts<333

(requests are open for stuff you wanna see in the universe/series!🫶🏾)

#steve harrington x reader #steve harrington fic #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington smut #steve harrington x you #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington x fem!reader #stranger things fluff #steve harrington #steve harrington series #steve harrington x y/n #steve harrington x fem #stranger things fic #stranger things imagine #stranger things series

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aphroditesbaby1616 · 2 months

Text

Balessan - (c.b. oneshot)

♡ O.S Inspo: Balessan ; Also known as: Poplar Buds, Balsam Poplar, Balm of Gilead, Mecca, Mecca Balsam, & Bechan - This Magickal herb can be used to bring forth; Love, manifestations, protection, healing, de-stressing, and assisting in healing from the loss of a loved one. Use in love sachets; carry for healing, protection, and mending a broken heart.

♡ Summary: This amazing, big brained, fabulous & wonderful request is inspired from this ask from my beautiful flower @daysofyellowroses - Thank you my love. -- In this O/S You & Carmy spend a day with his nephew at the park!

♡ W/C: 4,200

♡ Posted Date: 03/19/2024

♡ A/N: Aaaa! look at me pumpin' these one shots out like hot cakes!!! Get your requests in folks I have a long weekend ahead hahaha!! This was BEYOND fun to write, thank you so much again Rose for such an amazing request. I hope it's everything you imagined!! I lovee love love writing mushy happy Carmy, he deserves all the love in his life!! I totally see him being the pushover uncle just like this, Happy Meals & Ice Cream for daysss!!! <3

♡ Warnings for BTC: NONE!!! Well... carmy smokes a cigarette at the end? That's all hahah - ***NO USE OF Y/N - AS LITTLE PHYSICAL DESCRIP. AS POSSIBLE - READER IS CALLED 'BLOSSOM' IN THIS O/S :)***

➵ 𝐂𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 ♡

Carmen had never felt true love before. He didn’t think he’d ever know what that felt like. He’d heard stories of parents meeting their newborn babies for the first time, saying that ‘it was an indescribable feeling of holding the entire world in the palm of your hands.’ And that to him, sounded like bullshit.

It was sweet and all, but considering the way his mother and father treated he and his siblings growing up- that moment was fleeting at the very least.

That was what he’d thought, until that is- he got the call that would change his life, forever.

Sugar and Pete had kept the gender of their baby a secret, Carmy was very excited for them, and though Pete wasn’t his favorite person- he knew in his heart he’d be a great dad. Better then he could ever do at least, so that had eased his mind for the new blood of his family.

Pete had called to inform him that Sugar had given birth, finally, he thought to himself. He didn’t realize that the labor process could take days. Sugar had went into the hospital on Tuesday, in the early afternoon when her water had broken- it was now 4 pm Thursday evening. It was about time for the kid to make an appearance.

He’d made his way down to the hospital right away, no questions asked. It was Sugar after all, and after Pete had told him she wasn’t having any visitors, but had requested that he specifically come see her- he wasn’t gonna let her down.

He’d even stopped at the 24-hour deli convenience store on the way, getting her a club sandwich that she’d been moaning about not being able to have for months - something about pregnant people not being allowed to have lunch meat? He wasn’t sure what that was about.

When he got in the room, it was so quiet, he could hear his heart thumping in his ears. He wasn’t sure why he was nervous- it’s not like the kid was gonna have an opinion on him…yet. But still, he knew first impressions were important. He also didn’t want to fuck anything up, he wasn’t very sure how to hold a baby- he’d never held Eva when she was young, and he heard babies necks were super floppy, so he was really nervous he’d hurt them by mistake.

“Hey..” he said softly, and Sugar sits up. She looked utterly exhausted, she was pale, her hair was knotted and sweaty all stuck to her forehead, and her eyes were bloodshot from either pain or being so tired, he wasn’t sure which.

“Bear! You came!” She said quietly, opening her arms for a hug. He walks over to her, carefully wrapping his arms around her as he wasn’t sure if her stomach would be hurting or not, and kissing her cheek lovingly.

“Y’re amazing Sugar, you did so good, thats fuckin’ crazy- you had a baby, Sug” he tells her, rubbing her arm gently. Carmen didn’t know much about pregnancy and birth, other than what he’d learned from Sugar over the past year or so. The only thing he really knew about the birthing process was what he’d seen on TV, and the fact that birth hurt like an absolute bitch, and that there was no way around it.

“Thank you…is that-“ she asked, picking up the bag he’d placed next to her on the bed. He smiled a bit, pulling the sandwich out.

“Club sandwich. Don’t say I never listen to you” he teased and she pouted, tears filling her eyes and she pulled him into another hug.

“Y’re the best Bear.” She said. “Sorry…I’m gonna be hormonal for like..another year” she laughed a bit.

He chuckled softly, rubbing her back. “I’m used to it by now.” He teased.

The door opened, and a nurse wheeled in a bundle of white striped blankets in to the room, lying in a bassinet.

“Oh! Uncle is here! Okay so baby did great, they’re all set. We got all the bloodwork we needed, took their k shot, everything is looking wonderful. I’ll let you get acquainted” she said, being sure not to give away the baby’s name or gender before they were ready, leaving the little bundle next to Sugars bedside before heading out and closing the door quietly behind her.

The baby coos, making sweet adorable little noises. Carmen took the bag of food for Sugar, placing it on her bedside table as she carefully picked up her baby, cradling them in her arms.

Carmen was in awe. Everything about them was so…tiny. So pure, so untouched by the world. He carefully nudged the blanket down so he could get a better view of their face, the babies teeny little hand peeking out. He couldn’t help the small gasp that escaped his lips as the babe curled their whole hand around his forefinger.

“Sug” he whispered, tears pooling in his eyes and falling to his cheeks before he could try and hold them back. “Oh god…” he said softly, stroking the baby's tiny fingers with his thumb.

“Michael Anthony Lombardi” she said softly. He looks up at her, jaw dropped.

It was totally something sugar would do, so sentimental. Naming her first son after her 2 brothers. But now, Carmen felt even more attached to the little guy. He was carrying his name- he had to take care of him, protect him, the same way Michael had done for him.

Carmen sniffles, kissing her head and resting his cheek on top of it as he looks down at the beautiful little baby. Well- maybe not beautiful physically- yet. Carmen always thought brand new babies looked fairly weird, of course he’d never tell Sugar that, though.

But, beautiful in the sense that he knew what this baby meant for them, for their family. It was a brand new beginning, and maybe- just maybe…this would be enough to get his mother to clean up her act enough to be the grandmother for this baby how she couldn’t be a mother to he and his siblings. “Nice to meet you, Mikey” he said with the kind of smile that made his eyes crinkle, vision blurry with tears.

It had been about 6 months since you and Carm had met, and one of the things you loved about him was what an active, engaged uncle he was with his little nephew, Michael.

He’d grown plenty now since the first time he and the little cub met, being ‘a whole hand and a thumb’ as Mikey proudly told you the time you’d met the little firecracker at the first family dinner you’d attended.

That little boy was Carmy’s sun, moon, and all of his stars. He was constantly spoiling him with new toys, clothes, taking him out for “Mikey and Bear” days, the kid was the lockscreen on his phone for crying out loud. If you weren’t dating him, with the way he talks about that boy- you’d think he was a single dad.

Sugar very much appreciated it though, she never wanted to stop working when she’d gotten pregnant, so being able to balance four different days off with 3 adults, rather than just split the duties between her and Pete- it helped their lives as a couple run a lot smoother overall.

It took a while for Carmy to even introduce you to Mikey. He’d been nervous, reverting to his old ways of ‘waiting for the other shoe to drop’ and nothing would crush him more, then introducing his favorite little guy to someone, getting him used to them, and then them leaving him.

He could handle that rejection- but he damn sure wasn’t gonna subject Mikey to that same pain. If there was one thing Carmen swore, it was to protect the child with everything he had.

This was the third time you’d be meeting Mikey. Carmy had asked if you wanted to take him to the park together for a picnic after he’d picked him up from school, and of course you agreed. There was no better way to spend the afternoon than sharing snacks with your Bear under the shade of oak trees from the late spring sun, and chasing around Sugars mini-me until he clonked out on the blanket for a nap.

When you’d arrived to the park to meet them, you spotted Carm’s large black blanket with his backpack and 2 matching big and small Nalgene water bottles, adorned with stickers from different water parks and amusement parks they’d been to together, but he nor Mikey were nowhere to be seen. But you couldn’t miss them with how loud Mikey was being.

“No! No! I call foul!!” Carm laughed boisterously. You continue on, seeing them come in to view past the blockade of a large tree- to find Carmy rolling in the grass as Mikey tackled him for the football he was holding.

“The Cub takes down The Bear at the 20 yard lineee!!” Mikey shouts ferociously, jumping up and pouncing on Carmys chest in a bodyslam.

Carm groans, “Ohhh you little cheater- when did we start wrestling?! They don’t do bodyslams in football, kid” he wraps his arms around Mikey, caging him in and tickling his sides, causing him to squeal and laugh wildly.

“Wow! Uncle Bear has been lacking at the gym, thanks for takin’ care of my light stuff Mikey” you said teasingly with a big smile.

Mikey quickly got up, running over to you “Blossom!!!” he squealed, crashing into your waist, nearly knocking you over in the process. Blossom had become your nickname in the family, since the first time they’d met you, Carm insisted you’d smelt like cherry blossoms, to which Sugar and Richie agreed, so from then on- you were Blossom.

“Woah! Kid you’re getting strong huh? Peewee football training been gettin intense?” You give him a big hug.

Carm chuckled, getting up and dusting the grass and leaves from his hair and shirt, coming over and greeting you with a peck on the lips. “Tell me ‘bout it- Thanks for meeting me, kids got crazy energy today.” He said, ruffling the boys curly soft brown hair lovingly.

“Nowww can we eat our lunch?” Mikey looked up at him, his pretty blue eyes sparkling in the afternoon light. He really did look like Mikey, and Carmy mixed together in the best way. The Berzatto family genes were mighty strong, at least on the men’s side.

“Yes Cub. Y’know…you scammed me into a happy meal before we got here, how can you be so starved?” He teased, causing you to giggle.

“Again? Wow Carm, you’re going softer and softer as the days go by” you teased, sitting down with he and Mikey on the comfortable blanket under the shade of the trees.

“Well it’s hard to tell him no. Did you know he got a 100% on his spelling test t’day? Mikey, tell Blossom how to spell ‘water’ ” he told him with a grin.

Mikey looks over proudly “w-a-t…” he stops for a moment, looking at Carmy nervously.

“You got it bud, keep goin’- sound it out, what’s next?” Carmy encourages gently.

“E! It's E! w-a-t-e-r!” Mikey finishes proudly and you both clap for him excitedly.

“Oh my goodness! You are such a smart boy. Good job Mikey!” You gush, giving him a high five.

“That’s right the smartest. First spelling test of the year, and you nailed it bud!!” Carmy praised, hugging him and kissing his head sweetly.

“Mommy’s gonna be so excited!” He said, sitting crisscross as he opened up his pb&j Carm packed for him.

“She’s gonna be stoked, Cub. Absolutely stoked” you told him, taking the sandwich Carm had offered you.

“Oh! Blossom I learned a new joke- listen, so you say who’s there when I say ‘knock knock’ got it?” Mikey asks and you nod with a smile.

“Alright, thank you for my lines ahead of time, Cub” you joked, earning a chuckle out of Carmen who had surely heard this joke one million times since he’d learned it, considering he saw the kid no less then 5 days a week.

“Knock knock!” Mikey said, looking at you expectantly.

“I’m doing the dishes” you said, causing Mikey to burst into adorable giggles and Carm to follow suit since he couldn’t help himself when Mikey got started.

“Nooo! Blossom!” He giggled “you say ‘who’s there’ this time, ok?” He said and you nod.

“Okay, okay. I’ll make sure to be not so busy this time.” You teased with a giggle.

“Knock knooock!” He said again.

“Hold on just a second! I need to feed mister mittens- my cat!” You said and he laughs again, shaking his head.

“You promised! Blossom! It’s ‘who’s there!’ “ he giggled.

“Okayyy! Okay! Whoooos there?” You oblige.

“Harry!!!” He said happily, popping a grape in his mouth.

“I don’t know a Harry- so scram!” You teased and he laughed so hard he snorted, causing you and Carmy to crack up in a fit of laughs together.

“You’re bad at jokes Blossom, here watch, Bear will do it right f’me. Bear, knock knock” he looks over at Carm.

“Who’s there, Cub?” He said, taking a bite of his own sandwich.

“Harry” he smiled big, “listen blossom” Mikey urges, causing you to giggle.

“Harry who” Carm said with a large grin. “Harry up and open the door it’s raining out here!!!” Mikey said, bursting in to a fit of giggles which of course caused you and Carm to join.

“Ready or not here I come!” You hear Carmy say. You hold your finger to your lips, holding Mikey tightly in your lap in the tube slide so you both won’t fall and give up your ingenious hiding spot the two of you had come up with.

“Shhh! We gotta be quiet Cub or he’s gonna find us- the bear will eat you!” you joked and he covered his mouth quickly to contain his giggles.

“Where are youuuu!” Carmy called from the other side of the playground, you giggled quietly to yourself.

“We picked a good spot bud!” you whisper proudly and he nods, hugging your arm sweetly. Leg suddenly cramps up from being in such an awkward position in a tube meant for children much shorter then you, and you gasp quietly, moving your foot to relieve it but in the struggle- your flip-flop slips off, sliding down the tube slide and you hear it thump on the ground below, blowing up your hiding spot.

You and Mikey look at eachother as you hear Carm laugh, “Ohhhh! Dead!! You’re both dead!” he said and you quickly lift Mikey behind you.

“Go Mikey! Save yourself he’s gonna eat you!!!” you laugh and he scrambles out of the tube as Carm climbs up from the bottom, grabbing your bare foot.

You squeal in laughter as he pulls you down the slide by your feet, catching you at the bottom and kissing all over your face and neck, nibbling as he goes. “You’ve been caught” he growls playfully, pinning your arms above your head and kissing where your shirt rode up over your stomach leaving playful lovebites on your hips.

“Hey!” Mikey yells, running up and hugging Carms leg, hanging on it like a little monkey. “Thats my best friend! Leave her alone you big grizzly bear!” he yells through his giggles, playfully hitting Carmys leg.

“Ohhhh you’re dead Cub, dead meat buddy” he pulled away from you, scooping Mikey up and swinging him around. “Y’think y’can just beat up y’re best uncle mm little man?” he holds him upside down by his legs holding him carefully and dangling him in front of your face causing him to laugh wildly. “I present your savior Blossom, he’s been defeated” he sways him teasingly causing him to laugh more.

“Oh noooo! Cub! The Bear got you! I forgot to tell you….he and I were working together in secret- mwahaha!!” you laugh evilly, tickling his exposed belly and he wiggles screeching in laughter.

“Not fair- Not fair!!!” he said between giggles. Carm carefully laid him on your lap so he wouldn’t get sick from being upside down and checks his watch for the time.

“Alright- we got 15 minutes, do we want swings, slide, or playing a game?” Carmy asked, causing Mikey to whine.

“Noooo! Bear! It’s not time yet!!! It’s not even dark” he pouted, pointing at the sun, causing Carm to smile.

“Y’re right, its not dark, but bein’ a big man in kindergarten means you got big man responsibilities now, like goin’ home and doin’ homework w’Dad yeah? He’s gonna be waitin’ on you, Dad’s not a man I can reason with m’friend, Higher rank on the totem” he ruffled his hair.

“Fiiiine” Mikey grumbled. “I wanna do swings, race me-” he jumps up from your lap, sprinting towards the swingset.

“Wha- hey! You’re supposed to say 1,2,3, go! Those are the rules cheater!” Carmy laughs as he jogs after him. You slipped on your flipflop, going after the two boys.

“I beat you! See Blossom my new shoes make me so fast!” Mikey called to you proudly, hopping up and sitting in the swing as Carmy finally caught up.

“I did! Super fast Mikey!” you agreed with a giggle making your way up to the swingset.

“Oh! Oh! Blossom, let’s see who can get higher!” Mikey said happily and you oblige, sitting on the swing next to him.

“Alright, Bear- you’re the judge I guess” you smiled, starting to pump your legs.

“I’m a tough critic, I expect perfect form outta you” he teased, sitting down on the picnic table in front of the swingset as he watched.

“I’m gonna win” Mikey said confidently, already getting a few feet higher then you had.

You giggled, “Yeah- cause you had a head start” you counter, pumping your legs harder trying to gain more momentum.

“It’s lookin’ good for Mikey babe, keep it up kid y’re doin’ great” Carm encouraged, resting his hands behind his head and stretching his legs out as he watched.

“Bear can I jump off and you catch me?” Mikey asked hopefully to which Carmen laughs.

“Noooo way kiddo, I’m not takin’ a trip to the ER t’night, I got work in the morning and either i’ll end up hurt, or y’mother will kill me” he said, causing you to laugh as well.

“You’re gonna break your neck kid, don’t do that at school, did that once as a kid and I broke my ankle” you giggled, gasping as your flipflop flew off once again and hit Carmen right over the top of the head, causing you and Mikey to burst out in a fit of giggles.

“Hey!” Carm said, rubbing his head jokingly with a chuckle.”Those things are proving to be a horrible choice of park footwear, baby” he snorts, setting the shoe next to him on the bench for when you got off.

“I’m sorry! My work shoes were a worse choice and these are all I had in my locker” you giggled, the wind whipping your hair as you get higher and higher in the air.

“Bear! Bear! Look how high I am!!!” Mikey said proudly to which Carm nods with a big grin.

“That’s right bud! Y’re so high right now, bet you could touch an airplane if it was flyin’ over huh?” he said, digging his phone out of his pocket to take a video. “Say hi to Mommy!” he said and Mikey laughed happily, waving at Carm.

“Hiiii Mommy! I love you!” he said sweetly with a giggle. “Am I beating Blossom? Huh Bear? Am I higher?” he said and Carm chuckled.

“Mhmm- sorry baby, I think Mikey has ya beat this time around,” he said, ending the video and slipping his phone back in his pocket.

“Well how could I beat the best huh?” you mused, stopping pumping your legs so your swing would slow.

“I told you!” Mikey giggled, digging his heels into the woodchips to come to a hard stop and running up to Carmy, giving him a big hug. “Can we get ice cream bear?” he asked and Carm laughed, shaking his head.

“You don’t stop, huh kiddo? No ice cream, It’ll spoil y’r dinner. How ‘bout, if y’really good at school this week- When I get you on Friday, we’ll go you ‘n me yeah?” he pats his back and Mikey nods with a pout.

“Pinky promise” He holds up his pinky and Carmy hooks his own around it, kissing Mikeys hand, and Mikey kisses his.

“See? Deal” he ruffled his brunette curls and got up, grabbing the flip flop and coming up to you, crouching down grabbing your leg and kissing down your calf causing you to giggle before he carefully put the flip flop on your foot.

“I want a piggyback!” Mikey said, jumping on Carmys back to which he caught his balance with his forearm.

“Woah! Okay! Alright piggyback it is bud but y’gotta tell me yeah? We don’t want anyone gettin’ hurt” he told him, hiking him up on his waist as he stood up, Mikey wrapping his arms around his neck securely.

“Ok I’ll tell you next time” he replied. You hopped off the swing, taking Carmy’s hand and interlacing your fingers as you walked, swinging your hands together happily. The weather was absolutely perfect today. Not a cloud in the sky, perfect humidity, 72 degrees, you were surprised there weren’t more people here at the park other than the fact it was a Wednesday afternoon.

The three of you made your way back over to the blanket, and Carmy gently sets Mikey down to fold it up and pack up his backpack with the remainder of the food we couldn’t finish. “Blossom look! Look! I can jump so high in my new shoes!” Mikey said, tugging your pants to look at him and you obliged, keeping him busy as Carm tried to get everything situated to pack into the car.

“Alright little jumping bean, time to go home d’you wanna race to the car, or I’ll carry you?” He asked, putting on his backpack and carrying Mikeys for him.

“Race- 123go!” Mikey said quickly before taking off and you laughed. Carm shakes his head with a smile, holding your hand as you both walked after him to the car.

The ride back was full of laughter and singing Bluey songs, of course. That was Mikey’s favorite show at the moment, and you couldn’t help but smile at the way Carmy sang with Mikey along to every word. Carmy had even gotten a little Bluey air freshener that hung on his rearview mirror, just another little piece of Mikey that hung around, alongside his carseat that permanently lived in the back, the polaroid of him, sugar, and Mikey on his dash, the many toys scattered along the backseat. It was more than clear that the little guy held his entire heart in the palms of his hands.

“Alright buckaroo” Carmy said as he pulls into sugars driveway. Mikey unbuckles himself, flinging forward and wrapping you into a hug.

“Bye awesome blossom, thanks for playing with me” he said sweetly. You smiled, ruffling his hair and wrapping your arms around him.

“We’ll do it again soon, bud. Be good yeah? Listen t’your momma” You told him, patting his back. Carmy got out, grabbing his bluey backpack for him, helping him out of the car and carrying him up the steps, opening up the door and heading in to drop him off.

You opened up the center console, digging out Carm’s cigarettes and a lighter, knowing he was gonna be craving one bad when he got back in the car. Sugar didn’t even have to ask, as soon as the baby was born- if he was gonna be around the baby he wasn’t smoking until after he’d left, so there was absolutely no chance of any secondhand smoke being passed on to him.

Cracking the window, you lit it, taking a drag as he shuts the door behind him and comes back to the car. You offered the cigarette between your fingers and he smiled, taking it after he buckled his seatbelt. “Have I reminded you today, how much I love you my perfect angel” He leaned in, giving you a sweet lingering kiss on the lips.

You smiled, humming softly at the sweet gesture. “Yes- well- not in person today, but, you did text me - good morning, I love you when you went to work, so that counts” he smiled as he took a drag, backing out of the driveway carefully.

“Well, I love you baby, What are we doin’ f’r dinner? Am I cookin’ er we goin out?” he cracks his window, ashing his cigarette before having another drag, resting his tattooed hand on your thigh, stroking gently as he drove.

“I’m in the mood for some Berzatto Family Pasta” you hum, resting your hand out the window to feel the cool kiss of the spring evening breeze. “Family pasta it is, Blossom”

#carmy berzatto x reader #carmen berzatto #the bear fic #the bear fx #carmy berzatto #the bear hulu #carmen berzatto fanfiction #carmy berzatto fanfiction #the bear fanfiction #the bear #carmen berzatto fluff #carmen berzatto smut #carmen berzatto x reader #carmen berzatto x you #carmy #carmy the bear #carmy x reader #carmen x reader

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all-mirth-no-matter · 5 months

Text

Time After Time | Chapter Thirteen

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Reader, Tommy Shelby x Original Female Character

Summary: A significant death shakes up the Shelby household just as you find your way back inside. That events and those after make you start to wonder if now is the time to finally listen to Madam Despoina.

Warning: character death, language, yelling

ao3 link | catch up on tumblr here

Chapter 13: Ghost

I like the sad eyes, bad guys, mouth full of white lies. Kiss me in the corridor, but quick to tell me goodbye. You say that you're no good for me, ‘cause I'm always tugging at your sleeve. And I swear I hate you when you leave. I like it anyway. — Ghost, Halsey

Coming back to the Shelby household wasn’t exactly what you expected. Best case scenario, you expected to be greeted warmly by Polly or Ada; worst case, you expected to have the door immediately slammed in your face by Tommy himself.

Instead, when you knocked on the door, little Katie greeted you.

John’s oldest daughter’s eyes widened and a smile spread across her face when she recognized you, “You’re back!”

She grabbed your hand and pulled you inside as you used your foot to close the door behind you to keep out the cold. When you got into the kitchen, Finn jumped from his chair and threw something into the fireplace.

“Finn,” you scolded. “That a cigarette?”

“Don’t tell Aunt Polly,” he begged, cowering down more in his chair.

Jack ran into the room, a smile on his face as he got ready to watch the show of his youngest uncle getting into trouble.

You hung your jacket on the hook and sat next to Finn, noticing him flinch slightly as you scooted closer. The instinct made you swallow knowing he probably expected you to hit him — one of the discipline actions of the times that still made you cringe despite your attempt to shield your facial expressions.

“I won’t. But you really shouldn’t smoke, especially while you’re still growing. It stunts your growth, ya’know. You want to be this height your whole life?” You tousled his hair playfully to emphasize your point.

Actually, you weren’t a hundred percent sure if that was true — you remember hearing it when you were younger (that and coffee) but you never actually ever did research on it yourself.

“It’s also bad for your lungs,” you added, closing the unattended box of sticks that were sitting in the middle of the table. “It’s bad enough the air quality here is practically smoke itself, the second hand smoke will probably kill us all—“

“Is that what’s happenin’ to mummy?” Katie asked, her hand resting on your knee as she began petting the material of your skirt.

Brow creased, you looked to Finn and Jack, then around the house and noticed no one was around.

“Where is your mum?”

“She’s sick again,” said Jack, or J.J. as you’d immediately called him when you learned that his real name was John, and that he’d been named after his father (Junior). Another moment of instant regret, seeing as you had no idea if initial names or initial nicknames were a common thing yet. But the seven year old latched onto it immediately and you’d apologized to Martha profusely. After the initial shock of her son insisting everyone call him this, who she’d named after John proudly, she finally admitted to finding the nickname quite cute.

That’d been the first substantial interaction you’d had with Martha after just starting in the house. Even before the boys returned, you’d offered to help watch the kids whenever Polly or Ada were babysitting. You’d built a bit of a rapport with the little ones over the months, which had honestly surprised you seeing as you had zero experience with children, being an only child and not having been around family outside of your parents your whole life. It’d taken a little longer to get friendlier with Martha, but eventually you’d found a mutual ease around each other when you were both in the house. But unlike Ada, you didn’t find yourself spending any time outside the house, or alone even, together. And that was okay.

But when she first started getting sick, you’d tried to put in a little more effort to at least let her know you were there for her, or Polly, or the kids, if they needed you. Last you’d heard, Martha had started feeling better around Christmas.

“It’s not smoke, dummy,” J.J. said harshly to his younger sister when she asked again if it was was because of the cigarettes.

“Hey,” you said instinctively, “no need for name calling.”

“Auntie Polly said she’s cold—“

“She’s got a cold—”

“Where is she now?” You interrupted before they escalated, bringing all three of their attentions back to you.

“Auntie Polly took her to the ha’pital,” Katie answered. “Teddy and Annie are with Auntie Ada, said they needed naps.”

And with that, you launched into babysitter mode for the three downstairs. You kept out of the way of the kitchen, especially when the shop opened. When Ada returned with the youngest two, you all took a trip to the shop for food, per Polly’s instructions. By the time you returned, Polly was back and starting dinner.

That’s when she broke the news silently to you and Ada.

Martha had passed away.

Polly was angry with the hospitals, ranting about how she didn’t trust them and how she never should have taken her there in the first place.

“I’ve sent word to John, but he’s still in Digbeth. I’m afraid I’m going to have to break the news to the children.”

You offered to stay the night to help with the kids and housework. That first night had been filled with tears. You even caught Polly’s eyes damp a handful of times during the quieter moments.

Over the next few days, whenever you didn’t have a shift at the Garrison, you ended up at the Shelby house, even sleeping in one of the unoccupied bedrooms most nights. Polly was spending most of the following days preparing for the funeral, while you and Ada tried to make this new world make sense to the children.

You and Ada both had your own experiences of losing your mothers to draw on in an attempt to console the little ones. But it was still difficult, especially for the youngest two, who were still not completely understanding that their mother wouldn’t be coming back. Finn’s patience and kindness to his little nieces and nephews had been the most endearing part for you. He’d been too young to remember his own mother, but was able to explain this new reality in child terms that surprised you.

Since arriving in this time and place, it was hard not to judge the living conditions and lack of opportunities that surrounded you, especially when comparing them to your own upbringing. You’d always considered yourself middle to lower class, but you still had so much more privilege than whole chunks of the world.

Here, even with some of those privileges, you were beginning to understand just how much faster it seemed these children of the time had to grow and mature than you ever had to. Hardships like losing parents at a young age were just the beginning — poverty, malnourishment, lack of education opportunities — these were things that you couldn’t imagine having grown up through. It make you think about Ada and Tommy, your previous image of them running around as children suddenly shifting to something more heart clenching.

Your respect for Polly and her role as matriarch was already high, but over the next few days it only grew as she handled the household, children, business, and funeral arrangements nearly on her own. There hadn’t been a peep from John or any of the brothers until the night before the funeral.

Not yet asleep, you could hear the banging of doors opening and chairs moving in the kitchen. Instinctively, you rose from the cot and grabbed the fireplace stick. On your way down, you stuck your head in the kids’ room, seeing them fast asleep before shutting the door and heading for the noisy intruders.

“Come on, Tom,” you heard Arthur’s voice coming from the kitchen. “She’s got a sister—“

“S’not tonight.” Tommy replying made you pause, your heart jumping at hearing his voice for the first time in weeks. “We’ve got— got the funeral tomorrow, then back to ‘beth.”

His voice sounded lighter than normal, if not slightly slurred.

“Ah fuck it — we’ve been over there for weeks now. The whores here know exactly what I like, them in Dig—“

You cleared your throat, startling both men, though only one reached for his gun to point in your direction. Despite your curiosity to hear more about their escapades, Arthur’s voice had grown louder and you were fearful he’d wake John’s kids, who’d been nightmarish already to settle down.

Tommy’s throat bobbled as he lowered his gun, setting it down on the table. You noticed the dishevelment of his hair and collar of his shirt under his jacket. That, along with the way Arthur was swaying and both with nearly empty bottles in their hands confirmed what you suspected — the boys were wasted.

“The fuck’re you doin’ here?” Arthur asked, his voice not holding as much disdain as you expected, despite the words coming out.

“I’ve been helping Polly and Ada with the kids,” you answered softly, crossing your arms. “They’re asleep upstairs, if you wouldn’t mind keeping your voice down.”

Arthur’s brow creased, his voice still at the same decimeter despite your request. “You ain’t got kids—”

“John’s kids,” Tommy reminded his brother. He gestured toward the door, “Go on now. Don’t you have someone to meet?”

Arthur perked up, “Right! Suppose you won’t join me now, eh? You’ll know where I’ll be!” He gave a final shout before leaving the room and closing the door loudly behind him, causing you to cringe and listen for the stirrings of awakened little ones.

After a moment of silence, you turned back toward the kitchen where Tommy was beginning to remove his jacket.

A deep red stain on the shoulder of his shirt sleeve caused you to gasp, walking toward him without realizing what you were doing, setting the fireplace poker on the table.

“What happened?” You asked, touching his arm gently as you rotated it to see a slash in the fabric.

Tommy shrugged, unsteady on his feet as he instead reached for the fuller bottle of rum on the counter. “Just a scrap ‘fore we went to the pub, ‘s nothin’—“

“I can help—“

“Just go back to the room—“

“Sit down,” you instructed more sternly. He glared at you, but you didn’t let it stop you. “Take off your shirt, that’s going to infect if we don’t clean it.”

“I can do it m’self,” he mumbled and turned to leave, but began to stumble as he became imbalanced.

You caught and stabilized him before guiding him back to the chair. “You’re drunk as fuck, Tommy. Just sit down and let me help you.”

He huffed, but began to slide down in the chair until it creaked with the extra weight. Satisfied, you finally turned to get a fresh bowl of water and clean towels, then the bandages you’d seen Polly use a few times before. He was unbuttoning his shirt when you pulled up a second chair closer to him, ringing the cloth in the water.

“What were you gonna do with that?” You caught his gesture to the fireplace poker on the table, his voice laced with condescension. “Should learn how to handle a real weapon.”

By the time you sat down, Tommy had his bad arm out of his shirt.

“I know how to handle a gun,” you answered plainly, your voice serious as he watched you examine his wound.

Well, you knew how to handle a gun in the 2000s, that is. With your father being a military man, he wanted to make sure you and your mother went through the proper gun safety and etiquette classes since there’d likely be some weapons in the house. You hadn’t been to a shooting range since your father was alive, but you imagined if you had to handle a gun today you’d at least not make a total idiot of yourself. Now, whether you could actually shoot a live person was another question.

Concentrating back on Tommy’s arm, the blood had begun to crust around the cut, but began to bleed slightly as you started to put pressure on it. He hissed slightly at the contact.

“Sorry,” you mumbled slightly as you continued to work. “Why’d you let this go so long? You know better—“

He scoffed, “Do I?”

“I would have assumed so,” you answered honestly. Someone with the military backing he had, he must have known the dangers of infections and exposed wounds. Though as you worked you began to realize it wasn’t as bad as it’d originally appeared.

He took another swig of the bottle before handing it to you.

“No thanks,” you answered, not in the mood to drink tonight.

“For the cut,” he said as he shook his head, a breath of amusement exhaling from his nose at your reaction.

Sterilizing, you realized, giving yourself a duh as you took the bottle and carefully poured some on his skin. He hissed again as blood started to flow once more before you applied proper pressure. You sat there silently for a moment, just holding the rag to his arm, when you noticed him looking down at the cut sleeve, running his thumb across the red stain.

“So much blood for such a small cut,” he said softly, mostly to himself.

Your brow creased as you lifted the rag to look at his arm. The cut itself wasn’t that deep, but it was pretty substantial, at least in your opinion. Maybe comparatively it wasn’t as bad as some of the other injuries he’d had in his lifetime. The thought made your heart clench as your eyes began to notice other scars along his arm and uncovered chest.

You kept going back to a particularly gnarly scar just above his chest as you lifted his arm to wrap the bandage.

“Did you get this fighting?” you finally asked, turning your attention back to the cut, your curiosity getting the better of you.

He grabbed the bottle and took another drink. “‘Cause that’s all we do, eh? Drink, fight, and fuck—“

“I didn’t say that,” you interrupted, your voice strong in defense.

You wouldn’t mention how his brother was just talking about whores. Or how they were both currently drunk. Or how the last time you’d seen him in this kitchen he’d been bloody and bruised from an altercation.

Probably wouldn’t be helpful at this point.

Instead, you tried to appeal to the logical side of him. “Just with the Digbeth expansion, I’d imagine that can be pretty dangerous.”

You finished the tie of the bandage as you looked back up at him. He was already watching you, his eyes red and glassy, causing the already bright blues to appear more translucent against the candlelight. You noticed how much darker the skin under his eyes were, and couldn’t help but wonder when the last time he slept was.

“You’ve got some on your hands,” he pointed, gently wrapping his hand around your own. He lifted it, revealing the deep red smear on the pad of your hand. He used his good hand to squeeze out the rag and began to clean your palm.

“It’s just blood,” you shrugged, trying not to let on that your heart was racing at the intimacy. “Blood doesn’t scare me, Tommy.”

He looked between your eyes. For a moment you felt like he’d suddenly become sober as he lifted his good hand and gently ran his thumb against your cheek. “It should.”

You swallowed. “Tommy, I—“

“You don’t belong here.”

At his words, you felt your back straighten in defense, not realizing how close you’d been moving in toward him. Your heart began to race even faster as you tried to decipher what exactly he meant.

Part of you knew he must have been talking more in general terms. That you deserved something more than Birmingham in a gambling den with gangsters.

But there was something in the rawness of his words. Something that made you feel like he knew what such a phrase could actually mean to you — that you didn’t belong here, in this time or this place.

“I don’t,” you answered honestly, not helping the sincerity of the words falling from your lips. “But here I am. And here is where I want to be.”

Tommy’s expression remained unreadable as his eyes flicked between both of yours, looking for the lie. His adam’s apple bobbed, then he whispered, “With me?”

The sound of soft whimpering caused you both to jump, turning back toward the kitchen doorway. Katie stopped at the archway, dragging a blanket as she used the end of it to wipe her face.

You rose from your seat to collect the little one — this wasn’t the first time she’d woken up crying since her mother’s passing.

Katie nuzzled her face into your shoulder as you turned back toward the kitchen. Tommy was already standing, putting his arm back in his shirt and grabbing his coat and gun, still slightly uneasy in his footing as he headed for the door.

“Where are you going?”

“Out.”

“Tommy—” you called as the door shut behind him.

—-

The next morning was hectic as everyone prepared for the funeral. You didn’t see the brothers again until that afternoon, John’s eyes red despite the stone expression he kept on his face as everyone offered their condolences.

You felt Tommy’s eyes on you as you both navigated through the house, stealing a few glances at him yourself when he wasn’t looking. Neither of you spoke to the other though, and you were beginning to wonder if he even remembered your conversation the previous night. But each time you found yourself thinking in that direction, you shook your head to remind yourself of the bigger picture of the day.

Polly explained that they would start at Charlie’s Yard and walk the body through the town Martha had grown up in before reaching the graveyard. There, the priest would perform the ceremony. Apparently most of Martha’s family was already gone, so the guests would be mostly John’s family and her friends. After the burial, the Shelbys would return to Charlie’s Yard to burn the caravan filled with Martha’s mementos and pictures. Apparently this was more of a Shelby family tradition, something you were greatly interested in learning more about, at a different time of course.

The preparations reminded you of your recent conversation with Polly over spirits. It got you thinking about the tea Madam Despoina had given you again.

Excusing yourself to get ready for the events of the day, you left the Shelby house to change in your lodgings, doing your best to find something black. The only thing you didn’t have was a hat, but Ada had promised to bring you an extra. Your eyes kept shifting over to your dresser drawer.

It’d been almost a month since you’d received the gift. You’d spent months desperate for an answer as to how or why you were here. And it seemed that just as you were given some sort of clue, some key to unlock something — you were rejecting it. You’d gotten caught up in the found family of the Shelbys and the unshakable pull you felt from Tommy. This new life you’d created for yourself had become a distraction and disassociation of the still very real mystery of your circumstance.

Your eyes moved again to the dresser as you looked over yourself in the mirror. Could the answer be in that cup of tea?

A knock at the door caused you to jump, your heart racing at being caught with your own thoughts. Half expecting Ada with the hat she’d promised, you were surprised when it was Tommy instead who stood on the other side of your door.

He had his hands shoved in his pockets as he stood there uncomfortably. He cleared his throat, “Ada wasn’t sure if you’d know where Charlie’s Yard was, so I offered to come collect you.”

“Oh,” you replied, wondering if it was true. “I just need to get my coat then—“

“Tommy? What are you doin’ here?” You heard another man’s voice down the hall as you turned back around to poke your head through the still open door of your apartment.

Benji approached the doorway in a button-up and small bouquet of flowers in his hands.

Tommy’s brow creased as he appraised the man, then looked between the flowers and you before his face hardened and back straightened.

“What are you doing here, Benji?”

He smirked, “We were going to get dinner, remember?”

You hadn’t. The man hadn’t even been a speck on your mind the past week.

“I’m sorry, Benji,” you began, your voice sincere, “um— Martha passed away this week. We’re on our way to the funeral, I can’t see you tonight.”

“Oh,” he turned to Tommy. “Right I heard about that. I’m sorry for your loss, mate.”

Tommy shook his head. “Save your condolences for my brother, Hancock. We’re going to be late, if you’ll excuse us.”

Without waiting for you, Tommy began to walk down the hallway toward the exit. You rushed to grab your coat and lock your door behind you before apologizing again to Benji and hustling after Tommy.

“Suppose that answers my question,” was the first thing out of Tommy’s mouth when you finally caught up with him, still looking straight ahead as you both walked down the lane.

“What?”

“Last night—“

“You remember last night?” you asked surprised. He had been really drunk

He scoffed, still not slowing in his walk nor giving you a glance. “I remember a lot of things. Including you telling me you weren’t interested in Hancock.”

“I wasn’t,” you answered, trying to catch your breath.

He scoffed again and your eyes narrowed.

“But then nearly a month went by after you ghosted me so I thought what the hell, give the guy a chance.”

“Ghost?—“

“You told me to stay away—“

“And staying away means being courted by a Peaky Blinder, ya?”

“Courted?” Your brow creased at the use of phrase. “It was going to be one date — just a dinner, we weren’t getting married.”

He rounded on you, pulling you abruptly into an alcove off the sidewalk until your back was against the brick. His eyes bore down at you as the fire returned to his eyes. “Do you know what happens to people who cross me?” He started, his voice lower than it had been moments before. “They lose their ears, their tongues, their eyes. You have no fuckin’ idea who you’re talking to.”

“I do,” you said, your voice just as strong despite the threatening tone of Tommy hovering above you. His eyes simmered for a moment. “You think you’re a monster. Maybe you are— maybe you have to be, maybe you don’t. I don’t care. I said I was going to help you. So shove off with the chauvinistic ‘I’m pushing you away to keep you safe’ bullshit — I don’t want it.”

You surprised yourself at your own words, though you tried to keep your face from showing it. Deep down, you’d always believed what you said, but you hadn’t known exactly to what extent. Did you not care if Tommy Shelby was a monster? No. And you couldn’t shake why.

“You’ll regret it,” he said, his eyes icy once again with the same hint of desperation you saw the night before.

“Not as much as you’ll regret going from ‘I need you’ to ‘stay away from me’—“

He shook his head, finally taking a step back from you. “I was being selfish—“

“Well then be selfish!” You took a step back toward him. “Because dammit, Tommy, I need you too!”

He pulled your body into his so quickly you nearly pushed him away. But your body immediately reacted to the feel of his lips against yours as you pulled yourself in closer, wrapping your arms around his neck.

You broke away first, the whistling of pedestrians on the sidewalk making you remember you weren’t as concealed in this alcove as you thought. Though Tommy didn’t seem to care, his eyes still focused on you as you caught your breath.

“Don’t think just kissing me absolves you from giving a proper explanation for your actions,” you tried to say as serious as you could muster between breaths.

You were still mad at him. He’d put you through a roller coaster of unnecessary emotions the last few weeks. For him to get jealous at the prospects of you moving on? There was something more, you could feel it. And there was no way you were letting him get away with not explaining himself fully before you felt you could open back up to him again.

The corner of his mouth rose in amusement, “Come to the races with me when I return.”

“What?” your brow creased, though the corner of your mouth tugged upward at the prospects of what sounded like a date (you really were delusional when it came to this man).

“I want to take you to the races. Join me?”

You shook your head, “Is this the Tommy Shelby version of an olive branch?”

He smirked, “Maybe. We can talk more then.”

“Deal,” you answered, pulling his smirk into a genuine smile as you both turned back to continue down the sidewalk.

—-

The funeral was beautiful. Honestly, you hadn’t any idea what to expect when Polly talked about the arrangements. But the words, the songs, and the beauty of the traditions had you in tears. John held his children during the entire procession, and gave a lovely send off before lighting the fire.

Despite the grief you were feeling for the family, your brain hadn’t been able to stop thinking about the tea in your bedroom. Tommy had informed you that they’d be wrapping up Digbeth soon, returning properly in a few weeks.

That night was the first night you’d been back in your own apartment. The first thing you did was open your dresser drawer and remove the box.

You left it on your counter top as you started the fireplace, then the kettle. As you reached for the tea cup, you wondered if it was smart to be alone while you did this. You were, after all, still about sixty percent sure that the old tea was just going to give you either a stomach ache or seizure. But, you guessed that was better than the ninety-nine percent that you’d been at upon first receiving.

You gently removed the leaves and vial of water, following the instructions from Madam Despoina as you made your cup.

Holding the warm tea in your hands, you made the last minute decision to sit on the floor — reasoning that if you collapsed or something, at least you wouldn’t have as far to go.

You settled on the rug, inhaled deeply, closed your eyes, then brought the edge of the cup to your mouth.

You could feel the hot water run through your throat, then down to your chest before the warmth began to spread through your arms and hands, down to your stomach, then legs, then toes.

With your eyes still closed, you sat for a moment, waiting for something to happen.

When nothing did, you took another sip. Again, nothing happened.

Sighing, you sent a small thank you to whomever was listening that you at least didn’t go into any kind of shock, then opened your eyes.

“Hello, darling.”

>> next chapter <;< chapter masterlist

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wolvesofinnistrad · 26 days

Text

Read on Ao3 Here.

Its been about 6 months.

6 of the best months of a relationship Buck has ever had. And its not even about it being a guy, discovering his bisexuality. Its just... Tommy.

Hes great in so many ways, and the dynamic is so different that for the first time Buck has been able to relax, not always feel like hes chasing after someone. Actually, hes found out he quite likes being the one that gets chased, romanced, flirted with.

Everything is going great and hes even, in the back of his mind, been starting to think this might be it, this might be a long term thing after all which he'd have never expected. And then Eddie fucks it all up by telling him his most recent girlfriend, Beatrice or something Buck honestly hasn't kept track lately, broke up with him because quote "i can never have a place in your life when you've got Buck so entrenched in it."

Hes never had anyone imply that his and Eddies friendship, the little family hes made with Eddie and Chris, is somehow wrong or off-putting. Eddie was more annoyed than anything and didn't seem to care. But Buck... Buck got worried. Not because he cared about what Betty or whatever thought, but because he wondered if it wasn't true. If maybe their dynamic would scare people off eventually, and did that mean it would scare Tommy off as well?

So that's how hes sitting here, curled under a blanket on the couch, a new sectional he bought because Tommy's back didn't get enough support in the last one, spilling his guts to his boyfriend. When hes done he looks up at Tommy, expecting, well, something. Anger, confusion, heartbreak, but... Its not there. Tommy smiles at him, placing a hand on his leg over the blanket. "Evan... i understand how important Eddie and Chris are to you. I would never make you choose. I would never try to cut them out or deny you that."

Buck takes that in sits with it for a moment but finds it doesn't fully alleviate his concerns.

"But what if... i mean, if were together, you know, for the long haul. It wont affect you? What i have with them?"

Tommy smiles, he looks away for a minute and laughs.

"Can i be really honest with you Evan?" He says, meeting his eyes now.

Buck nods.

Tommy inches closer, drawing up one of his legs beneath him. "When we first started dating i knew you all were close, but i didn't really understand until later that you were a 'family.'" He pauses, thinks. "But when i did, yeah, there was a moment i was a little worried where i fit in. Where there was space for me in your life. And then i had an idea, and once i wrapped my head around it that way, re-conceptualized how i looked at things, it didn't scare me anymore."

Now that's surprising to hear, Buck wants to know what could have so easily changed his mind. "And what was it that made you not worry then?"

Again Tommy laughs. "I started thinking of Eddie like he was your ex husband."

Bucks eyes bug out a bit. "My what?!"

Tommy shrugs. "It was easier in my head than just saying your best friend who you're co-parenting with. I've dated guys with kids, with exes before. It wasn't a stretch to think of it like Eddie was your ex and Chris was your kid from another relationship. Once i put it in my head like that, i didn't worry about whether we could have a life together. You'll always be tied to them, but it didn't mean you couldn't have a life with me to." He reached over and took Bucks hand, squeezed it tight. "And honestly Evan? I'm starting to think I'd like that. A life with you."

Despite how weird it is to think of his little family with Eddie and Chris that way, how Tommy sees it, there's something relief and happiness coursing through him. Knowing that Tommy's already figured out how he can keep some of the most important people in his life and incorporate them into a new life hes building for himself. For him and Tommy.

"Evan?" Tommy asks, scootching closer on the couch, their knees knocking together.

Buck realizes its been too long since he's said anything, but when he speaks he simply says "move in with me."

For all of a second Tommy looks shocked, then elated, then seemingly guarded. "Evan... You don't have to lock me down or something i just exp-"

Buck cuts him off, "its not that. Trust me, I've done that before. Held on so tight, clung because i was scared of being left behind. This isn't that. This is..." he stops, lets his mind and body calm enough to get this right. "This is me holding on because I don't want to let go. Because i want to stay, right here, with you. I'm not scared of being left anymore, I'm scared of not putting down roots. Of not letting the best boyfriend I've ever had,"

"Only," Tommy interjects.

"Best," Buck reiterates, gripping his hand tighter, boyfriend I've ever had know that i want this. I want him. I want a life with you too. And hearing that i think, it was just the final thing falling into place, the last weight weighing on me. I... I've been thinking of asking you for a while, but i wanted so bad to get it right this time. And i think i am, but Tommy." He looks into his eyes. "Tommy you're the first time I've felt like if i got it wrong it would still be okay, we could make it work anyway. So move in with me. Please. Or.. heck, we could get a place of our own if you like?"

Tommy kisses him then. Its slow and passionate but all consuming. Its like nothing hes ever had before. And it feels so right. For once it feels Right.

A week later Tommy sends him a photo of a house for rent. Rent to own actually.

"Wheres that at?" He asks, because its a nice place, he can see the potential.

"Its literally a block away from Eddie's house, I saw it as I was driving away." He says, and Buck can almost hear the laugh and smug smile miles away.

"Its perfect." He writes back. But what he means is, 'you're perfect.'

#bucktommy #kinkley #evan buck buckley #evan buckley #tommy kinard #this is a bucktommy endgame fic dont hate me but im into them rn #my fic #fanfiction

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hanrinz · 1 year

Note

rosie u have the biggest most sexiest brain ever im waiting for best friend rin rn ok

✩ ‧ ₊˚ CAN YOU SEE RIGHT THROUGH ME? — RIN ITOSHI.

content. fluff, 1.1k words, failed attempt at angst, ooc rin !!! not proofread / notes. my dear amora <33 no bc i have so many thoughts about best friend! rin 😮‍💨 how did this get so long T-T

his name on your contacts is literally 'bf rin<3' and it literally stands for best friend, he doesn't know that but let him dream, okay?

kidding it's just 'teal bitch' (i can't think of names tbh), unless...

anyways.

no cause i firmly believe he walks with you to school or rides the bus with u everyday, he'll always be at your home by 6 am and your mom always prepares breakfast always urging him to eat with the two of you. she would always scold you for not waking up early like rin.

always with the comparing.

but, hey at least your mom absolutely supports the both of you if ever did end up together. may or may not have already planned your wedding or anything (maybe even had a bet between the both of your parents) but you didn't hear that from me.

and he would judge you for every guy you have a crush on PLS, you'll be like: "that guy is kinda cute," and he would glance at the guy you were pertaining to, brows furrowing and giving you a side eye,

"tf your taste in men is lukewarm," excuse me?????!!!?? he thinks he looks sm better.

he would always hangout with you on the weekends always down to watch movies with you, horror of course bc what else could he possibly watch.

"hey, wanna watch a movie? i got a new horror one," sending him up a text as you ready your room for your movie date night.

"be there by 10," he would always reply, following up with a question. "chips or ice cream?"

you'll always pick the ice cream anyways, yk he likes it very much and he just buys both of it no matter what.

always with the bickering and you hitting him of some sorts.

"at least I wasn't dumb enough to get back to my ex, twice!"

"at least your brother follows me on my social media account!"

"fuck you??????!!!????" *he was crying*

sae would be so fucking done with rin, he doesn't care anymore. you and his brother hiding feelings for each other is so painful to watch anyway. probably the reason why he left for spain. (omg what is he doing here)

okay so your friends- scratch that everyone in your town practically wondering why the two of you haven't got together yet and like please they are all literally waiting for THAT day. best believe that everyone was so willing to help rin to confess to you. how did everyone know? a little birdie or a demon (shidou provoked him obv) which is more accurate may have possibly babbled it about to a person who's a chitty chatter and soon enough everyone knows.

and you might not notice it whenever you look away from him or when you're distracted, his eyes couldn't help but to look at every inch of your face or admire it. you don't know how he looks at your pictures every night, you don't know that all he needs is you beside him, you don't know how much he wants to just take you in his arms and tell you he can treat you sm better than that lukewarm piece of shit person you call your ex.

and you don't know that he had beaten your ex right on the face 11 months after your break up. he came into your home at 1:43 am with a cut lip and bleeding knuckles, you didn't suspect that it was your ex who had the honor to be met with his fist. you only scolded him, not to get hurt again, to stop losing his temper and picking fights.

he was sitting on the counter of your kitchen, laying his head on your shoulders, you in between his legs, as you caress his hair. and he likes to say something, to say so much more than a promise. and holds off for awhile, snuggling deeper into your neck, feeling his breath that has your skin tickling. your afraid he might hear the pounding of your heart right into your ribcage. taking a deep breath, shakily.

"rin, you need to go home," you whisper.

you were only met with silence, as you felt his hand intertwining with your free one.

"don't make me go," he says right into your ear. "just- just stay.."

and you couldn't really resist him, can you?

"okay. 'm not going anywhere," you stood still, your thumb drawing circles on his hands. "i'll stay... i'll stay, rin" you reassure.

something changed after that night, and you finally noticed all the signs. how rin was more of a different person to you and not just because he was your best friend. but because he had a feeling. now, his eyes would hold more meaning than his words would.

and it scared you.

how much all this time, you were pretty much blind and oblivious. because this was your best friend, the man who you had almost spent your whole life with. and he looks at you like a precious thing he doesn't deserve.

because finally all the love songs have meaning to it now. all the things around him remind him of you. and as much as he tries his best to mask everything he was feeling, it kept slipping down on his face whenever he was with you.

and confessing to you wasn't the perfect scenario he had imagined so many times, it was awful, he thinks. the rain was pouring hard and loud on the pavement. you were on the road, the same road you would always walk on the way home. all wet and soaked from the rain, you still look pretty. you were pretty.

"i like you," he said, it was almost like a whisper from all the noises. he's pretty sure you didn't hear him, but the way you were walking towards him with a smile adorning your beautiful face, he can't help to think.

did you hear it? is this really happening? he finally did it.

and it didn't occur to him immediately how your lips were pressing against his, all under the rain your hands caressing the side of his face. and he didn't waste anymore time, kissing you back with the same intensity. he can feel you grinning against his lips.

you pulled away, arms wrapping round his neck, "i like you too, rin itoshi," you said with elation, eyes brimming with tears.

"i like you a whole lot," you repeated.

he could only take your lips once again as if he would die if he wouldn't. fuck, he thinks he needs to hear you say it, again and again.

and just like that the mask he's been wearing all this time was gone.

"what took you so long, idiot?"

◞♡ something took over me while writing this, it's monday again i hope everyone has a great week ahead!

#roses ‘r rosie #rin itoshi fluff #rin itoshi x reader #rin itoshi x you #blue lock x reader #blue lock x you #rin itoshi imagines #blue lock headcanons #blue lock fluff #blue lock #rin itoshi #itoshi rin x reader #itoshi rin x you #itoshi rin

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smoochkooks · 9 months

Text

—chapter nineteen: illicit affairs

this is a part of my an ode to a broken heart drabble series.

pairing: jeon jungkook/reader genre: unrequited love, best friends to (?), heavy angst, smut word count: 1.6k words summary: it dies a million little times...

previous || next

Five months later

There is a park nearby your apartment, sandwiched between the residential buildings. It has been here way before some chaebol had decided to buy this land and transform it to yet another wealthy neighborhood in downtown Gangnam. It looks almost surreal – tracts of green among concrete. There’s not many people here today. It feels like a scene from a movie: remote, run-down bench by the pond standing directly underneath the only magnolia tree in the park, and the girl sitting on it with an unreadable expression. What's going through her mind? What, or who, is she thinking about? She's clutching the phone in her hand in a death grip – the only sign she's feeling any emotion right now. Nightingale sings somewhere in the far distance, the sound breaking the deafening silence. Then, a phone rings. Once, twice, three times.

You pick up.

“I told her.” Jungkook waits a beat and then adds, “She wants to speak with you, in private.”

You wonder if he can make out your ragged breath through the speaker. It's the only thing you can hear now, as if the whole world has gone quiet just to listen to your conversation.

“I gave her your number. Is that okay?”

It was all your design to come clean, to free your conscience from the burden that's weighing you both down day by day. You agreed to do this, but he still makes sure if you're ready. A single magnolia petal lands on your thigh. You stare at it, transfixed. He calls your name. So softly, so gently and you break a little.

“Okay.”

The line cuts off. No one says goodbye.

Soojin contacted you soon after that. She sent you a message, asking whether you would have time to meet with her on Friday. She had chosen a coffee shop in SNU’s neighborhood where she had met Jungkook all those years ago. When you googled later the address you found out it's one of those places designed to serve both as a coffee shop and bookshop. How ironic. There's no doubt your book will be sitting on the bestseller shelf, mocking you as your best friend's wife is confronting you.

You arrive almost fifteen minutes earlier. Your heart is beating so fast it's borderline painful, your entire body trembling from anxiety. You don't know exactly how much did Jungkook tell Soojin, so have no idea what to expect from her, which makes you even more uneasy. She has the upper hand here. You notice a stack of ‘An Ode To A Broken Heart’ copies laying on one of the tables and avert your eyes somewhere else.

You try to pass the time by swiping through social media but it's too hard to focus. You keep re-reading sentences because you can't make out what they mean. You've never been good with handling stressful situations, ever since you were a child. You envied kids who didn't worry about tests and exams. Growing older, you managed to control your nerves a little, once you realized you couldn't possibly continue living like this forever. In high school your parents took you to a therapist and that, along with anxiety medication, helped you survive finals and college. However, today you can't help but feel like the girl who couldn't sleep before a math test all over again.

Soojin enters the coffee shop on time. She looks flawlessly, just like during her wedding day. Her silky, black hair is styled in pretty curls and she's wearing light make-up accentuating her features. She’s dressed in a formal attire, a white button-down blouse and beige pants, so she’s probably here on her lunch break. Not much time for a private conversation it is, then.

She orders her coffee to go and looks around. She smiles when she spots you but you can easily tell it’s not sincere, more of a courteous manner. “Hi,” she says and takes a seat in front of you. “Have you ordered something yet? They have amazing lemon tarts here.”

“I’m fine with just coffee.”

“I’d love to eat something sweet but I’m currently trying to cut down on sugar, so just coffee for me, too.”

You nod, not knowing how to respond to what she said. It has always been hard for you to talk to her, ever since Jungkook had introduced you two together. She doesn’t really speak down to you but she carries herself with such superiority it’s making you feel self-conscious.

Soojin was born into an upper-middle-class family from Seoul. Her father owns a prospering business, so they’ve never really had to worry about money, as far as you recall what Jungkook had once told you. She used to attend ballet classes but dropped out of dancing school before entering university. That’s probably where her poise comes from. Thinking about it makes you straighten your slouching pose.

“Are you working around here?” you ask, trying to ease yourself into the conversation. She hasn’t moved straight to the point yet, so you’re panicking a little.

“Yeah, the company I work for has office nearby.” Soojin answers courtly. She takes a sip of her coffee and in a flash, the polite tilt of her mouth vanishes. “You know I’m not here to chit-chat with you, though.”

There it is.

“I’m aware.”

“What did Jungkook exactly tell you?”

“That you want to talk.”

Soojin raises a brow. “That’s all?”

“I’m assuming he didn’t want to intervene,” you say. “He only told me you know about the book.”

Or was it the only thing he meant? Did he perhaps tell her about the New Year’s Eve kiss as well?

“Weird situation, isn’t it?” she asks. “I just found out that the book I liked so much is actually about my husband and his childhood best friend. I sympathized with someone who’s been in love with him for twenty years. Can you believe it?”

Irritation laces her voice already but you remain calm. “He didn’t know. If he didn’t read the book, he would have never realize it. Don’t blame him.”

“I’m not blaming him. I actually believe he had no idea about the book. Maybe he did suspect something about your feelings but he decided not to do anything about it. He married me after all, right?” Soojin says. “What bothers me though, is you writing a whole goddamn book about your silly crush.”

You frown. Silly crush? You wouldn’t go to such great lengths if this was just a crush. And Soojin knows it too, she read the book after all. But she’s not here as a reader who enjoyed your work. She’s here as a wife whose husband you’re in love with.

“I published it under a pen name,” you counter. You’re hoping your voice doesn’t tremble too much. Soojin would gladly use your weakness to her advantage. “I changed names, locations. No one beside me and Jungkook would have known it’s about us.”

“What gave you an impression that you could just use someone’s life like that?”

“It was my life too,” you respond firmly. Jungkook was mad at you because you didn’t tell him about your feelings and now Soojin is going to be angry in his stead for writing a book about your relationship with him? “I talked to Jungkook about it after he had found out. I already apologized and he said he doesn’t mind that–“

“Of course he won’t hold a grudge against you. You’re his best friend.” Soojin snorts.

You sigh heavily. This is going nowhere. It’s crystal clear why she wanted to talk to you but for some reason, she won’t say it directly. Maybe it’s a matter of pride for her, or she’s afraid to admit it out loud.

“I’d like to apologize to you too. I’m sorry for using your relationship with Jungkook for my book, however I am not going to apologize for the way I described it. I didn’t write anything malicious or improper about you. I put on paper what I had seen as a mere bystander,” you say. “I know you’re probably worried now that since everything is out in the open that I am going to act out on my feelings but I can assure you it’s not going to happen.”

Soojin chuckles. “Oh, I’m not worried about that.”

Maybe she shouldn’t feel so sure of herself, you think. It’s not your place to tell her about the kiss. If Jungkook chose to lie by omission, that’s on him. You can’t carry the guilt on your own.

“Because you will, from now on, refrain from hanging out with him,” she continues. “You won’t meet up as often as before, you won’t text him about your mundane life, you will contact him only if necessary.”

Your heart skips a beat. “What?” you croak.

“I don’t want you near Jungkook anymore, it’s as simple as that. I don’t trust you.”

She has all the rights to feel displeased. You’re in love with her husband, after all but forbidding you from seeing him? She cannot control your lives like that.

“Does Jungkook know?” you ask.

Soojin’s rose-tinted lips stretch in a smile. “No, he doesn’t know yet because you will be the one to tell him so,” she replies. “You will tell him that you don’t want to be as close to him as before, that you need distance. If he asks to meet and talk, you will ignore him. If he asks about our conversation, you will say that you apologized to me and I decided to move on.”

“And if I don’t?”

Soojin’s expression is almost triumphant. She got what she wanted at last: you, finally out of Jungkook’s reach.

“Then the world will find out who Magnolia May really is and how she seduced her best friend and made him abandon his wife.”

#jungkook smut #btswritingcafe #networkbangtan #ksmutclub #bangtanarmynet #bts smut #jungkook angst #jungkook fanfic #jungkook x reader #jungkook x you #an ode to a broken heart

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hoaxriot · 8 months

Text

CONEY ISLAND

pairings. sirius black x reader

synopsis. everyone was gone, dead. your grief wouldn’t go away as your husband was now in azkaban for the murder of everyone you loved.

notes. i need to stop getting inspiration from songs but i continue to do so, here’s this sad one. it’s short but whatever!!

part two.

──────────────────────

a month ago you had buried yet another loved one, james and lily potter. they were killed while harry— their kid, watched his mother die and he had somehow survived. sirius and you became his godparents but you had not been able to take him in, sadly.

only remus, mary, and you were left. mary left right after the funeral as remus stayed as you two helped each other.

sirius whom you fell in love with in early years of hogwarts who then became your husband after school was now in azkaban for the murder of all your friends. that was what ruined you, your loving husband killed his best friends. he even killed marlene’s family? it didn’t make sense. nothing ever made sense since the war started.

you were now walking down a trail that lead to a lake where sirius used to bring you, it was a five minute walk from the home you shared with him. as you stepped over a broken rock a memory popped into your mind that made tears prick your eyes.

“holy shit!” sirius laughed as you sat on the floor after falling on a broken rock, he continued to laugh as he leaned down next to you, “are you okay, darling?” looking up from the ground to see him grinning, you hit his shoulder making his smile drop quickly before he let out a gasp.

“why are you smiling? your wife just fell!” you said as you stood up with him behind you, he coughed trying to cover up a laugh. you scoffed jokingly before you face dropped as he picked you up throwing you over his shoulder.

he continued down the trail as you gripped on the back of his jacket, your dress was slowly sliding up causing him to grip the bottom of it pulling it down even though no body was around.

sirius stopped right by the lake where the water was at, he gently put you down in front of him. smiling up at him as his smile grew. you leaned on the tip of your toes to kiss him. the kiss was quick but it still meant everything.

pulling away he intertwined your fingers as he started to pull you down waterline.

snapping out of the memory as you now found yourself sitting down at a bench where you sat many times with sirius. it felt like you were grieving him, but he was still alive. though he was sitting in a cell, where did he go? the sirius you knew. constantly wondering that almost every second of every day.

more people had found out about the small place so there was familes and couples around you as you tried cancel out the noise. your long flannel hugged your body as the sun started to as the sun went down and the temperature got colder. you already felt cold almost every day, so many pieces of you were gone, you didn’t know if you could ever gain them back.

you don’t know how long you sat there but a loud laugh caught your attention, turning your head to the side to see a couple sitting on a blanket with a small kid with them. you watched as the kid stood up and walked to the father, it looked like it was the first kids steps due to the parent’s reaction. closing your eyes turning your head back to the lake as silent tears fell down your pink cheeks. people started to leave as it got colder, but if you could stay here forever you could.

hearing leaves crunch behind you but not turning around thinking it was just another random person. until you heard a familiar voice speak your name, turning around to see remus lupin with his hands in his jacket pockets. he sighed as he made his way around the bench to sit down beside you.

“how long have you been here? you worried me when i came by and you weren’t there.” he kept his voice soft as he saw the stray tears on your face, you lived a couple houses down from remus so he often came by. he stayed the night a lot of nights since most nights you cried yourself to sleep.

“i don’t know,” sighing as you brought your hand to wipe the tears, “i just- i don’t want to be in that house anymore.” remus frowned at the words that spilled out of your mouth.

it was a constant battle to wake up in the bed without sirius wrapped in your arms, then to get up and make him coffee. everything you did in that house you did it with him, now you did it alone.

“why don’t you stay with me for a little? i’ve got two extra rooms.” his eyes travelled down to your stomach for a second before looking back at the side of your face. you sighed at his words as you looked up at the sky. “it’ll feel like i’m moving on from him or forgetting him.” you and remus had this conversation many time as he watched you sob into your pillow curled up under your comforter. he couldn’t bare it anymore, he woke up every morning just to make sure you got up out of bed.

yes, remus struggled and you helped him but he had started to get better but you hadn’t.

still looking at the sky you thought about it, for the first time you thought about staying with remus. you could still go home whenever you wanted, that would always be your home but you couldn’t do this alone.

“fine.” you sighed out the words, remus smiled at you thankful that you accepted his offer, “alright, i’ll be in my car. come whenever your ready.” he brought his hand to your knee to give it a squeeze as he stood up. you smiled lightly at him before he walked away.

sitting at the bench for a couple more minutes as your hand came to your belly rubbing it lightly, “alright, kiddo. we’ll be with uncle moony for a while but when you’re here, i’ll be better. i promise.” speaking to the small kid that was forming in your stomach, sadly you found out after the whole ordeal and now you would raise your kid by yourself— and remus.

the journey will be hard but once your child is born, you know he or she will be everything you need.

#marauders #sirius black #marauder era #remus lupin #peter pettigrew #james potter #sirius black x you #sirius black x female reader #sirius black x reader #sirius black x oc

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threadbaresweater · 1 year

Text

Unexpected

As a recent divorcee, you're eager for a chance to spend a summer alone, finding who you are apart from your asshole ex-husband. Your best friend surprises you with the trip of a lifetime, and you spend a blissful three months walking along the beaches of a quaint coastal town. Enter Nanami Kento, widower of two years, his name on the lips of every woman in town. He's never shown interest in anyone until you come along. What blossoms between the two of you is more than either of you could ever hope for.

The details: 8.5k words, slow-burn romance, NSFW for eventual smut (oral sex, vanilla sex). Reader is divorced and has a child. This is a repost from a collab I did last summer.

The divorce was…well, it was.

You had married your high school sweetheart– first love, first kiss, first time. Now, you chuckled dryly to yourself while driving from the courthouse, I can call him my first husband.

You had no plans to marry again anytime soon…or, ever for that matter. The freedom you had experienced the past few months was more than wonderful– enough to convince you that staying single was the way to go. You didn't need a man. You were a strong, independent woman with ample free time, a job you loved, hobbies and friends and a beautiful child you got to dote on every other week.

The custody arrangement also allowed for summers spent with each parent on alternating years. The first summer belonged to your now ex-husband, which meant you had three months alone to spend however you pleased.

It was an emotional goodbye with your daughter, who didn't quite understand why you had to leave and why she had to spend the entire summer with her father. You reassured her that you could FaceTime every day, that she would have loads of fun with her dad and his new girlfriend, and that she could write and call anytime she wanted. The poor girl wasn’t convinced in the least, and you watched– tearful, behind your oversized sunglasses– as her father ushered her into the back of his car. The guilt ate at you long after they drove away, but you knew she would be safe with him. A little bored, most likely, but safe.

On the drive back home, your best friend called; all you could hear was excited squealing on the other end.

“What’s going on?” you shouted, laughing.

“I have a surprise for you!” she boasted; you could almost hear her bouncing up and down. You rolled your eyes and sighed, though your grin remained plastered on your face. “Oh yeah? Let me guess: a vacation house full of hot bachelors who are going to attend to my every need, all summer long.”

She gasped dramatically. “How did you know?”

“It’s my wildest fantasy. You’re my best friend, therefore you’re in my head and know exactly what I want, all the time.” You signaled a turn, driving away from the sunset. “But seriously, what’s the surprise? You know I hate surprises.”

“How rude!” she scoffed. “I’ll have you know that you were at least partially correct with your wild guess.”

You raised a brow. “Oh yeah? Which part? Please tell me it’s the hot bachelors. God knows I could use a personal massage with a happy ending.”

“Nope. Sorry, babe. But! My mom and dad said they’re not using their vacation property this summer. I told them about your divorce and they insisted that I give you the key to their house!” She squealed again, and you could hear the patter of her feet on the floor, wherever she was sitting. “Girl, you get a whole summer to yourself in a little house by the sea. Ah, I used to love going there when I was a kid! We used to have the best time, just hanging out by the water every day, riding bikes, eating ice cream…” She trailed off, her voice sounding wistful and far-away. “Seriously, you’re going to love it. Wanna stop by and grab the key?”

“Really? I.. well…” You were speechless. Though you really hadn’t made any plans yet, you knew that most of the summer would be spent practicing some much-needed self care. You had just planned on doing it at your own place, alone. But a vacation house close to the ocean sounded like something out of a romance novel– a place where you could re-center and learn about yourself again. A place to work through the pain of the past and learn to slow down and appreciate the little things in life.

"You still with me?" your friend laughed.

"Yeah, I– yeah. I'll be over in a few."

The day you arrived was picture perfect in every way. Warm sunlight and a gentle breeze streamed through your open car windows, and you could smell the sea as soon as you reached the quaint little town. Most people walked or rode bikes, and you slowed to a snail's pace, taking in the sights. Everyone seemed relaxed– laughter rang throughout the town, children shouted, bicycle bells rang, and the scent of cotton candy and sea breeze seemed to permeate the air. You knew instantly that this summer would be exactly what you needed, and you told yourself right then and there that you’d spend it in the most leisurely way possible.

The house was furnished, so all you really had to bring was personal effects– clothes, toiletries, a few good reads you’d picked up at the bookseller back home. The cupboards boasted plenty of space for food, and you planned to go grocery shopping later in the evening, as soon as you got everything else settled. You spent a little bit of time exploring the house, then opened the back doors that led directly to a boardwalk to the ocean. The view was immaculate– soft sand slipped beneath your bare feet as you walked toward the shoreline, a heavy wind whipping your hair around your face. Holding onto your oversized sun hat so it didn’t blow away, you took in a deep, cleansing breath and closed your eyes, a languid smile curling its way onto your lips.

Paradise.

A summer alone wouldn’t be such a bad thing after all.

Later, after a bike ride to the market, you hummed to yourself as you perused the narrow aisles, delighting in the cute brand names and marveling at the freshness of the produce. It seemed that everything was made and packaged locally, which made your heart happy. Focused on how plump and ripe the plums you picked out were, you didn’t notice the man standing in front of the tomatoes and ran straight into his side. He didn’t move– in fact, you don’t think he even stumbled in the least. He just stood there like a pillar and stared at you– expressionless, if not a little bored and annoyed.

You laughed sheepishly and took a step back, dropping your plums into your basket. “Sorry about that,” you said, looking into his brown eyes that seemed to hold nothing but disdain for your clumsiness.

“It’s alright,” he responded, turning back to inspect the tomatoes. “You should be more careful, though. Some might not be as forgiving as I am.”

Nodding, you turned to walk in the opposite direction, avoiding eye contact and feeling like a fool. “Right. Sorry again,” you mumbled. Wonder if he’s a local, you thought as you grabbed a few more vegetables and made your way to the cash register. Just as you were finishing up, he came to stand in line behind you and actually gave you a thin, tight smile when you looked back at him. Why did you blush? You turned away quickly and paid the sweet cashier, then hurried out to your bike, your heart pounding. Not out of fear, but for some reason you couldn’t quite explain. You secured your little bag of groceries in the basket on the front of your bike and pushed off, your eye on the sky. It looked like rain, and you needed to pedal fast.

Just as the first few drops of rain began to fall, you arrived home and scurried inside before getting completely drenched, then set about making dinner for one. You were used to only cooking for yourself during the weeks your daughter wasn’t home, but for some reason this meal felt particularly empty. Music will help, you thought, so you streamed some music from your phone onto the little speaker mounted under one of the cupboards and tried your best to quell the loneliness. Tomorrow would be better. Once you were settled in, had a good night’s sleep, and spent some time on the water, the whole idea would be much easier to stomach. You made plans to visit the rest of town tomorrow, to see what it had to offer.

It was nice, when you really sat down and thought about it. No routine, no deadlines. No rigorous schedule to keep or meetings to attend. It had been a long time since you’d been alone with your thoughts, and while at first it felt uncomfortable, it seemed to be exactly what the doctor had ordered.

You spent the first few days wandering through town, walking on the beach collecting shells, and devouring both books you’d brought along. You discovered all sorts of boutiques, art co-ops, coffee shops, even a pottery studio. It felt like something out of a daydream. Everyone was kind and pleasant, even the tourist families who tore through on weekends and laughed loud and hearty along the boardwalk. There was also a small library in town, and you spent an entire afternoon perusing the shelves and ended up getting a membership card to keep your appetite for reading satiated.

You found the library to be your favorite place to visit. Of all the little shops and public places, the atmosphere was exactly what you were looking for, what you craved. Quaint, quiet, and full of all the books you could ever want to read and then some, you visited often, especially on days when it rained.

The summer was one of the rainiest on record, according to some of the locals. You recalled something your grandmother had told you about rain meaning good luck and good fortune, so you didn’t get too disappointed when the weather didn’t bode well for outdoor days.

The handsome stranger from the market seemed to enjoy it as well. You’d find him in the same corner nearly every time you visited, his nose in a new book, blonde hair hanging over his forehead, an air of importance hanging around him. One afternoon, you perused the shelves near his seat and accidentally dropped the book in your hand. “Sorry,” you offered, sheepishly kneeling to pick up the paperback that had fallen to the floor.

He responded with a grunt, not even bothering to look up at you.

Well, you thought. Could be worse. He could have shushed me or gotten up to move to another area.

At the checkout desk, the friendly clerk gave you a conspiratorial smile. “I see you’ve met Mr. Kento.”

“Hm?” You glanced back at the man and found him looking at you, but as soon as you made eye contact, he looked back down at his book, turning the page and crossing his legs the opposite way. “Oh, him? Nah, we don’t know each other.”

The clerk chuckled as she scanned your books. “Honey, he’s here just as much as you are. I’m sure you two have had some kind of conversation in the couple of weeks you’ve been around.”

You shook your head. “I mean, we run into each other sometimes. At the market, mostly. I think I’ve seen him once or twice at the cafe, but–” You stopped short, watching her expression change into something akin to amusement. “Yeah, I guess we do run in similar circles. I don’t know his name, though. We’ve barely spoken two words to each other.” Leaning in, you lowered your voice. “Do you know his story?”

“Oh, honey, he’s a widower. His wife and daughter– bless their sweet souls– passed away in a terrible car accident years ago. He’s been around here ever since. The house he lives in was their family home.” She threw him a sympathetic look. “It’s been a long time, and I never really see him talking to anyone. To me, it’s a little sad. I think he’s still grieving.”

Nodding, you gathered your books and threw another glance in his direction before heading out the door. As you straddled your bike, you heard the bell on the door and looked up to find none other than Mr. Kento himself, sliding his sunglasses down off his head and onto his face. A brief moment of eye contact gave you pause, and you lifted a hand in greeting, hoping he wouldn’t blow you off.

“Are you a spy?” he called, stepping down the concrete stairs.

You had to laugh. “If I told you, I’d have to kill you!”

“So you are.” He pursed his lips, then stopped. “Tell me something about yourself so I don’t have to keep up this wild guessing game I’ve been playing with myself.”

“Guessing game? Are you really that suspicious of me?” You tilted your head to the side and offered him a small smirk– one which he did not return, nor did he look even the least bit amused.

Nanami crossed his arms and frowned. “I don’t have all day.”

“Fine. I’m a teacher, not a spy. And I’m just here for the summer.”

“That will suffice. Thank you,” he said, then strolled off in the opposite direction. You stood in place for a few moments, watching him leave, then headed home.

In the days following, you saw him in passing several times in town and on the beach. He always looked deep in thought; a dismal melancholy seemed to hang around him, as if he might have been carrying the spirit of his daughter and wife everywhere he went. Perhaps he did– you knew firsthand what it was like to be away from your daughter, but the depth of the pain of losing her forever was something you couldn't fathom, nor did you particularly want to.

He carried himself with a fatigued kind of poise– like a man who had worked so long and so hard to move on with his life but was still dragged down by his own personal demons that he felt there might be no escaping them. Tall and broad shouldered, you found yourself sometimes staring at him a little too long, thankful for the shield of your sunglasses so he didn't notice. Sometimes, he would find you and look back in your direction, but he'd never smile or wave. Just stare. You wanted to know what he was thinking when he watched you like that. You wanted a chance to talk more with him than just in passing.

One morning, your neighbor coaxed you into taking a hot yoga class. At first, you had balked at the idea. Yoga was supposed to be relaxing, not sweaty and uncomfortable. She convinced you somehow, touting the benefits and the promise of pure, unadulterated relaxation. Sweating out toxins and stress, letting your body really feel the burn in a climate-controlled studio where they cranked up the heat and the humidity.

The class was mind blowing. You really felt as if you had transcended to another plane. The instructor was kind and knowledgeable, the classmates respectful and attuned to their own needs. As you and your neighbor were chatting on your way out, using fresh, cool towels to dab at the sweat on your face and chest, you looked up and came face to face with a familiar face.

“You’re here,” he said, matter-of-fact, almost disinterested.

You raised a brow at him. “Well, um, yeah. I am.” You chuckled lightly and looked at your friend, who smiled back at you with a look that spoke of confusion and intrigue. “I’ve never done this before. Do you, ah, come here often?” The way you said it, it sounded like a corny pick-up line and you rolled your eyes at yourself, puffing out your cheeks in embarrassment.

He huffed something akin to a breathy laugh which felt strangely out of character, looking between the two of you; you were suddenly distracted by a bead of sweat that ran down his neck and settled into the curve above his collarbone, and barely heard his response. Totally bewildered now, you looked up at him, jaw slack, eyes wide. “Twice a week,” he answered, looking incredibly bemused.

Nodding, you looked at your friend and laughed a little at yourself. Oh God, this was nerve wracking in a way you felt embarrassed about. It felt like talking to your high school crush– the familiar jolt of adrenaline made your heart pump a little faster and your head tingle. You know your cheeks were flushed bright, and it had absolutely nothing to do with yoga. “It’s an intense experience. I never thought I’d enjoy sweating on purpose.”

The man offered a thin, strained smile. “How were the plums?”

“I beg your pardon?” you asked.

“The plums. From the market the other day? Did you enjoy them?”

He remembered. Which meant one of two things: he had been thinking of you, or he just had an incredible memory for details. You looked into his brown eyes for the answers but found him hard to read. “I– yes. They were delicious. I bought more the other day but you weren’t there to approve,” you said with a grin.

By now, your friend had quietly retreated to the shower room, leaving you with this handsome stranger again. An awkward air of uncertainty hung between you, and he nodded once, taking a step toward you. You took a step toward him for some reason, then you both stopped. A sheepish laugh filled the void, and he rubbed the back of his neck. “You know, if we keep meeting like this, people are going to talk."

You wished you could stop laughing at everything he said, but it was a knee-jerk reaction– one that made you sound like a total ditz. The more you did, though, the more he seemed to relax in your presence, as if your teenage girl behavior made him less self-conscious about his own rigid demeanor. “I guess that’s their problem, isn’t it?”

“I suppose it is.”

You shrugged and dabbed at the back of your neck with your towel. “I mean at this point, we might as well give them something to talk about and exchange numbers, huh?” A bold move, one you had no idea how it would be received. You knew what you hoped for, but you didn’t want to be presumptuous. You took a step back to reclaim your own space and kept smiling that same nervous smile you’re sure had been plastered onto your face during this whole encounter.

It obviously took him by surprise, but he nodded once, signaling that he agreed with your sentiment. “I’ll meet you out front after I’ve had a chance to shower,” he said, hooking his thumb over his shoulder toward the bathrooms.

True to his word, he waited for you at the entrance, leaning casually on one of the support beams outside. After exchanging numbers came another loaded, awkward silence before he extended a hand. “My name’s Kento. Nanami Kento.”

You accepted his handshake and nodded. “I know.” You gave him your name as well, not missing the way his brow quirked and his lip curled ever so slightly.

“You know?”

There went your heart again, skipping a couple of beats as you realized there should be no way in hell you already knew his name unless you’d been doing some recon. “I, well– I found out at the library the other day. The woman at the desk asked me if I knew you and she told me a little bit about you.” There. Blame it on the librarian.

“Oh. I see.” He pursed his lips and seemed to close off, the little progress you’d made in cracking him all but closed up now.

“She didn’t reveal much.” Lies. “Just told me your name!”

“I see,” he repeated, a little quieter.

You decided it was best to take your leave at that point and offered him a quick goodbye, followed by an exuberant “Call me!” before meeting your neighbor where she stood waiting by the bike rack, rolling with laughter at the show she’d just witnessed.

Not surprisingly, he wasn’t the first to text or call. You gave it two days and mulled over dozens of possible opening lines, then finally decided to break the ice on a rainy, mid-week afternoon.

Lovely weather we’re having, huh?

It took him two hours to text back. You only checked your phone 47 times while waiting.

DelightfulI fell asleep watching the rainWhat’s exciting in your world today besides the weather?You smiled and texted back right away:

A good book and even better wineI’ve been reading most of the afternoon. Not much else to doYou mean to tell me you don’t enjoy long walks in a torrential downpour?

Not particularly lolWhat about you?

You don’t see me out there, do you?

I’d need an awfully good reason to be walking in this weather

Would be a shame if someone invited you out for dinner

Yeah, I wouldn’t goNot tonight

There was a bit of a pause. A few minutes ticked by, and you stared at your screen with bated breath, wondering if maybe he got a phone call or fell asleep again.

What about tomorrow? Forecast looks sunny

Are you asking me to dinner?

I suppose I am

Giddy, you covered your mouth and squealed, pattering your feet on the floor before shooting back a response.

What time?

7:00?

Sounds like a date!

You sent it without thinking, but it was too late. You slapped a hand to your forehead and felt your fingers tremble, waiting for his reply.

YesA date… see you then.

If you had overstepped some kind of unspoken boundary, he didn’t acknowledge it, but that didn’t make you feel any less nervous or worried. You spent the rest of the afternoon putting together an outfit, anticipating dinner tomorrow night with more excitement than you’d felt for anything in a long time.

At seven o’clock on the dot, you arrived at his house, which ended up just being a short walk away from yours. Really, everything in this little community was reachable by a walk or a bike ride, so you weren’t too surprised when only ten minutes into your walk, you had found his address. The main door was open, leaving only a wood frame screen door as a barrier between his home and the outside world. Warm yellow light spilled from the entryway, and you could already smell whatever he was cooking. In your hand you carried a bottle of wine, and he pushed the door open for you before you even had a chance to knock or ring the bell.

“Ah, you’re punctual. I like that,” he said, lifting his arm so that you could duck under it and step inside. He took the wine from you and headed toward the kitchen; you had no choice but to trail behind, taking quick stock of his house. Tidy, but homey. Touches of seaside decor, a handmade afghan on the back of a rather elegant looking couch. Soft music played on the stereo, and there was no sign of children or pets anywhere.

“You live alone?” you asked, then reprimanded yourself. You sure had grown bold in the type of questions you’d been asking lately. Though it didn’t seem to bother him, because he set the wine down in the middle of his kitchen table and went about his business as you took a seat.

“I do. No children, no pets. No surprise wife.” Turning his attention to the stove, he seemed to find your question amusing and hid his smile. “What about you?”

You thought about your daughter back home. “Ex-husband. I have a daughter, too– she’s eight. Spending the summer with her dad.”

He nodded, then turned to you. Somehow in those few seconds that passed, he’d managed to open the bottle of wine and pour two glasses. Handing one over to you, he studied your face. You wish you could say you knew what he was looking for, but whatever it was he seemed satisfied once he found it. He raised the glass and took a sip of his wine, seeming to mull over the flavor; he swallowed and made a deep hum in his throat, “Excellent selection. You’re a wine lover, yes?”

A little bit of your nervousness began to dissipate, and you took a drink, too, mainly to wet your lips and tongue, which had been bone dry since you set foot on his porch. “Wine enthusiast, foodie, woman who desires a vacation away from her sad life on the mainland.”

He grunted a little at that, then continued his work with food preparation. “Your life doesn’t sound so sad. A child? That’s one of life’s greatest joys, isn’t it?”

Nanami had you there, and you knew it. Nodding, you fiddled nervously with one of the linen napkins he’d set out. “You’re right. She’s really special. Makes life worth living sometimes, you know?”

You couldn’t see it– not with his back turned to you– but pain shot through his gaze and he faltered while plating your dinner. “I do know,” he murmured under his breath.

“Beg your pardon?”

Plates in hand, he turned and set them down on the table in front of you, then slipped into the chair across from you. “I said I do know. About children making life worth living.”

“Oh! So you do have children?” You hoped that the tone of your voice didn't give away the fact that you already knew.

“Had. A daughter. She and my wife…” he trailed off, finding the napkin in his lap of great interest now.

His expression spoke of deep anguish, of unresolved guilt and overwhelming grief. Out of reflex, you reached across the table to cover his hand with yours. He was warm and soft, his hand trembling slightly. “I didn’t mean to pry,” you said.

“No, no. It’s alright. It’s been two years now. I need to learn to talk about it. Just not right now.” His demeanor shifted again, and he looked up at you with a soft smile. “I’d like to not talk about such heavy things while we get to know each other, wouldn’t you agree?”

“It doesn’t matter to me what we talk about,” you said with a shrug. “I’m just thankful for a meal I didn’t have to cook and some new company.” Lifting your glass, you smiled at him. “To new adventures. May we be fruitful in our pursuits.”

Nanami stared at you and raised his glass to toast. “To new adventures.”

Dinner led to a walk on the beach, which led to another bottle of wine on his back porch, which led to your head drooping onto his shoulder at some point well past midnight. He stiffened at first, the touch of a woman something he didn't feel was right to enjoy. The simple weight of you there made his stomach flutter, and he turned his head, tapping your chin with his index finger.

He said your name and you looked up at him, a lazy, drunken smile making its way across your face. "Don't fall asleep on me. I'm not done talking yet."

You lifted your head, widening your eyes. "What if I'm done listening?" you teased, feeling woozy and silly.

"Then I'll walk you home, if that's what you want. I wouldn't want to bore you any longer than necessary."

"You're not boring me, Nanami. I'm just relaxed. For the first time in ages, I feel like I can finally just rest," you said, turning to look out at the sea again. "For months I've just felt like I was running from something. And I was, really. From my ex husband, from a life that I didn't want, from my fears and my insecurities. I'm so goddamn tired and I just want to lie down and sleep." Tears fell unchecked down your cheeks and you sniffled, wiping your nose with the back of your hand. "I'm so tired," you repeated, your voice weary and thin.

There was a beat of silence, then you felt his weight shift beside you and he stood up, extending a hand to you. "If you're tired, let's walk," he said.

He wasn't ready to take you home. Not yet.

Another hour of conversation and you felt like you'd known him your entire life. The alcohol began to wear off and you found yourself more coherent, if not experiencing a bit of that weird, hollow feeling of being drunk and sleep deprived at the same time. At some point he held your hand, and you didn't remember when or how– just that it felt right and good, as natural as breathing.

Your walk took you to your own back porch, where he lingered for another hour saying good night. The sun peeking over the horizon brought you back down to earth and suddenly ready to go inside and try to catch a few winks of sleep.

"Thank you for your company," he said earnestly, picking a stray lock of hair away from your forehead. "It's been a long time since I've indulged in the company of a woman." Guilt flashed through his eyes, glassy from lack of sleep. "Since my wife passed, if I'm being totally honest. I– I've avoided getting to know someone… because I still love her," he said, his voice thick and quiet.

You squeezed his hand and watched as a single tear escaped from his left eye, daylight filling the space between you with each passing moment. "I understand," you whispered, unsure of what else to say.

"I'd like to see you again. Whenever you're free." It wasn't a question. He squeezed your hand this time and watched you closely as if calculating the odds of you saying yes.

"Sure, I'd love that." How about tomorrow? "Maybe the weekend? There's a little restaurant on the pier that I'd like to try. There's live music, too, if you're keen on dancing."

For the first time, he smiled. Genuinely, a bit uncomfortably– but a smile nonetheless. Nanami nodded and let go of your hand as you walked side by side up to your back porch. "I would enjoy that. I'll meet you there, say…seven thirty on Saturday?"

Dinner on the pier was a dream. Of course there were drinks as well, so by the time you finished eating, you were more than ready to take to the dance floor and finally move to the lively music the house band had been playing all evening. Namami surprised you here, too. For all of his stoicism and uptight demeanor, he was a skilled dancer. You struggled to keep up with him at times, but his broad hand at the small of your back and his confident steps kept you from making a total and utter fool of yourself. Even during the slower numbers, he held you with poise and confidence, and though you knew in your heart he wasn't interested in a romantic connection, you couldn't help but hope for something magical to happen tonight.

"You dance well," you said, halfway through one particular song in which you could feel the bassline pumping through your veins. That soft, barely-there smile of his made a delightful reappearance, and he studied your face with those deep brown eyes.

"My wife was a dancer," he said, spinning you out, then back in to fold his arms around your waist, your back to his chest. "She had students, one of which was the man you're dancing with now."

A moment passed, and you felt his warm breath on your ear, stirring a wisp of your hair as he exhaled. "I see," you breathed, trying desperately to quell the desire you felt building from the pit of your stomach. Though you wanted to live very much in the present with him– here and now– you found yourself thinking about what his life must have been like before the accident. A million and one questions came to mind, but you had no idea just how much or how little he wanted to talk about her. "She must have taught you well."

He chuckled, low and thoughtful, and the sound of it vibrated against your back. "I'm just a good student. Observant. Intuitive." He spun you around so that you had no choice but to look up at him again, nearly nose to nose. "I've always been very good at predicting people's behavior."

Your breath hitched. He was so close, yet you still felt some kind of invisible barrier between yourself and him. You imagined his wife, disappointed to know that the two of you were dancing like this– so close, so casually intimate.

"She would want me to live a happy life without her," he said, as if he'd read your thoughts somehow. Startled, you looked straight into his eyes and knew that this was your moment.

Your body seemed to move of its own accord and before you knew it, your lips met the plush softness of his. Eyes closed, you breathed him in, the heady taste of wine a subtle backdrop to the taste of his kiss. Dancing all but forgotten, you opened your mouth to deepen the contact, tongue touching just beyond his teeth until he made a low, soft moan and pulled back suddenly, drawing in a deep breath.

"I– "

"I'm sorry, I–" you began, only to be cut off by a firm press of his mouth against yours again. This kiss was a little more hungry, a little more insistent. You threaded your fingers through his hair and held him a little closer. The music seemed to stop, the world around you stilled, and you lost yourself in him.

You couldn’t remember the last time your ex-husband kissed you with so much reverence and care. In fact, you couldn’t recall a time he had kissed you, period. Nanami’s lips seemed custom made for slotting over your own mouth, however, and the longer you kissed him, the more you realized that you’d been starved of affection for so long it had begun to harden your heart. Somewhere deep inside, that shell began to crack, and when his lips fell down along the line of your jaw, you positively melted against him, mouth open in a breathless expression of pure pleasure– something you hadn’t allowed yourself to feel in months.

He walked you home under the pale moonlight, stars blinking overhead to further light your way. You’d swear you could hear the whispers of some of the women in town, but you paid them no mind. Tonight would be all about you and Nanami sharing yourselves with one another in the way you craved– the way you needed him and he needed you.

In the soft light of his bedroom he kissed and kissed you as if he couldn’t possibly get enough. He didn’t attempt to take off your clothes, nor did you try to undress him. The contact was enough, though you could feel the heat from his body radiating against yours, the energy of a man who had been two years without the touch of a woman. He took his time, though you could sense that he wanted more, so you took one of his hands and pressed it tentatively against your breast, looking him deep in the eye as you did.

Nanami broke the kiss, watching you intently as he pressed tentative fingertips into the soft flesh beneath your dress, a long exhale issuing from his kiss-swollen mouth. “It’s– I…” He found your nipple, taut and firm, and rolled it between his thumb and finger before pressing a reverent kiss to the skin just above your cleavage. You pressed a kiss to the top of his head and held him there, encouraging him to explore further.

Perhaps it was the wine. Perhaps it was the festive atmosphere you’d just spent endless hours enjoying. Perhaps it was a pure, unadulterated need that you felt for one another, but you knew then that he wanted you as much as you wanted him. You didn’t want to push, though. Not in the least. You wanted him to explore at his own pace, to find his way around your body and map it out, inch by beautiful inch.

“It’s been so long,” he whispered, pushing one of the delicate straps of your dress down off your shoulder to drop a kiss against the now exposed skin. You closed your eyes and breathed deep, already blissfully aroused, careful not to move too fast lest he decide this wasn’t a good idea.

“Take your time. There’s no rush.” Your voice was calm and reassuring as you felt his mouth pull in the skin just above your nipple, sucking a tiny mark before he pulled away again, stormy eyes drinking in your features, your reaction, your flushed face and glistening eyes.

Nanami backed you up to the bed, and when the back of your knees hit the blankets, you sat down, lifting your arms around his neck to pull him down into another kiss. He shifted his weight over you and lowered himself, lips trailing down across your jaw, down to your neck, tongue laving across your collarbone as he pulled down the other strap of your dress. Somehow, you worked your hands between you to begin undoing the buttons of his shirt, one by one. He allowed it, and you heard his heart begin to pick up its already frantic rhythm as you lifted your hips to graze his, desperate for friction between your legs.

He pulled away fast, panting, standing at the edge of the bed with a hand carded through his hair and his eyes wild. You sat up just as quickly, a little dizzy from the rush, and reached out a hand, your own eyes filled with concern. “Did I do something wrong?”

Nanami shook his head, a nervous laugh escaping his already open mouth. He took a few deep breaths and a step backwards, his legs visibly trembling. "No, you did everything right. I just– I need a moment. I'm sorry."

You didn't understand why he felt the need to apologize, and you told him so. "You’re fine. It’s fine. We don’t have to do this,” you cooed, crossing your legs under you and fixing your hair a little.

His eyes welled with tears and he looked away from you, his face flushing bright red as he inhaled sharply, pressing a tight fist to his mouth to quell his sadness. Before he spoke again, he seemed to center himself, then sat down beside you, resting his hand on your knee. “I haven’t been with a woman since my wife and daughter have been gone, and I don’t– I don’t think I should. I carry around far too much baggage to ask anyone else to help me shoulder it. And if we were to be intimate, I…well I know it sounds strange, but I’d feel as if I was betraying her somehow.” Nanami sighed heavily afterward, unable to meet your tender gaze.

“You said before that you think she’d want you to live a happy, fulfilling life. I’m not asking you to do this– we don’t have to do anything besides sit here and talk, but…consider that happiness might mean moving on with someone else, eventually. Doesn’t even have to be me–”

“But I want it to be you,” he blurted, startling both of you. He lowered his voice and took your chin between his thumb and forefinger and repeated it, softer this time, more intentional. “I want it to be you.”

The rest of the night, you held him in your arms while he told you the story of his wife– the love of his life– their daughter, their picture perfect life together before tragedy struck and took them away from him. You learned that he was out of town the day they were killed and harbored so much guilt and still hadn’t forgiven himself from being away on business. It took him two days to get back to them– between delayed flights and traffic patterns, he slept little and grieved painfully, thoughts of what he would possibly do without them pervading his mind. He told you that his wife had just been promoted in her line of work and his daughter was about to enter the third grade, that she was the brightest student in her class and had a talent for dancing and eating ice cream.

Nanami talked himself to sleep on your shoulder as the sun rose, his voice raspy and thick with exhaustion and raw emotion. He kissed you just before he succumbed to his dreams, appearing more content than you’d seen him in the short weeks you’d known him. You slept with him, in his bed, your own mind laden with the story of his lost love and with the hope that he could find it again.

You slept well past noon the next day, waking to the sound of sizzling bacon and the smell of a strong brewed coffee. At first you were a little disoriented, waking up in a bed that wasn’t your own, but you soon realized as you looked down at your disheveled dress that last night, you’d slept next to Nanami. The thought alone made your head spin, and you sat up slowly, stretching on your way down the hall into the kitchen to find him at the stove with a pair of tongs in his hand, humming along to a song on the radio.

A far cry from the vulnerable man you cradled in your arms last night, he turned to you with a soft, sleepy smile, the bags under his eyes looking a little less burdensome than before. He offered a quiet Good morning and handed you a cup of coffee, which you graciously accepted before sliding into a seat at his little table.

“I need to thank you,” he said, cracking an egg into the same pan where the bacon was frying.

You sipped your coffee, then tilted your head. “Thank me? For what?”

“For listening to me. For allowing me to release all that I’ve been holding in. I…I’ve never confided all of that in anyone before, and I have to admit– it feels good. So thank you." He sat down in the seat across from you and offered you a plate, which you graciously accepted. "I did want to ask you, though, how long you're going to be here. In town, I mean. I assume you have to leave at some point."

You nodded while chewing a bite, then swallowed, following it with a sip of coffee. "Three more weeks," you said. I have to go back and reset my classroom. What about you? Is this a permanent home for you, or is there somewhere else?"

Nanami shook his head. "Nowhere else. This is home. It has been since the accident. We used to vacation here as a family, and I can't bring myself to return to the house in the city." He paused to sip his coffee. "I sold it last year, actually. It wasn't home to me any longer."

Over breakfast, you made plans. Tentative plans at best, but plans to reunite in the summers– if not for anything romantic, at least to spend some time together near the water and nurture the friendship you’d built. You helped him clean up, then lingered in the doorway, caught between wanting to stay longer and wanting to go home and change your clothes and freshen up after last night’s activities.

But you found yourself reluctant to leave. Nanami knew it and reached for your hand, thumb running over your knuckles. “You can stay, if that’s what you’re thinking. I have a shower too, you know.”

The next few moments were a blur of lips, fingers, tongue and flesh. He pulled you into his arms and kissed you deeply, lifting you off the floor so that you could wrap your legs around his waist and hang on. He carried you to his bedroom where he took his time taking you apart, memorizing you inch by inch, just like he had started to do last night.

“I don’t” – he began, hooking his fingers under the elastic of your panties to peel them down and away from your body– “want you to think that I’m doing this out of some desire to forget.” He looked deep into your eyes while nimble fingers spread your thighs apart. You opened them willingly, reveling in the feel of his flesh on yours in such an intimate area.

“I know you aren’t.” And you did. Though much of your conversation had been about his past, you knew two things: one, he’d been needing to confide in someone for a long, long time; two, he desired you. You knew he did by the way he looked at you, the way he held your hand, the way his kisses felt like summer rain and his fingers between your legs felt like they belonged there.

“Good. I like you. I like you a lot,” he implored, lowering himself so that you felt his warm breath on the meat of your inner thigh just before his tongue licked a broad stripe right up your slit, making you arch your back clean off the bed and grip his hair in frantic fists. You closed your eyes as he explored you, his nose nudging the curls at the top of your slit, fingers delving just inside to provide extra stimulation in addition to his tongue.

You cried out his name as he took care of you, pulling him by the hair to hear him chuckle at your enthusiasm. With gentle suction, he pulled your clit between his lips and flicked his tongue over the sensitive bud, causing you to twitch and beg for mercy, please God please oh don’t stop don’t stop. At your command, he hooked his hands over the top of your thighs and dove in for the kill, licking at you like a man deprived of his favorite meal for far too long. Your climax hit you hard and fast, and it took you several minutes to recover, breathing deep, a sheen of sweat across your brow and chest.

Nanami gave you a few moments to breathe before he climbed over top of you, his cock pressing insistently on the inside of your wet thigh. You opened yourself to him willingly, without protest, and he slipped inside with a long, low moan, pushing his face into the space between your neck and shoulder.

No one had ever touched you the way he did. He cradled your head in his hands as he thrust in and out with slow, controlled motions, his girth stretching you in a most delicious way that had your eyes rolling back in your head and your jaw permanently slack. He pressed kisses along your neck and chest, his breath hot and steady, face never more than a few inches from yours. When he feared he might come too soon, he lifted you into his lap and had you straddle him; down onto his length you sank again, arms linked around his shoulders, each breath a low, wanton moan as you felt his long strokes inside you, filling you to the hilt with his impressive size.

He was quiet for the most part– a grunt here, a low rumble there, but he didn't speak. He was focused on your pleasure and his own, wanting to prolong it as much as possible until he couldn't hold back anymore.

The buildup was almost too much for you to bear, and when you felt him begin to twitch and pulse inside you, you came again, this time a more profound sense of euphoria making your head spin and your body tense until you scaled that peak. "I've got you," he whispered upon your ear, one hand at the back of your head and the other grabbing a handful of your ass, pushing you against him with incredible strength despite his own loss of muscle control.

The room was filled with the lewd sounds of wet flesh, of the evidence of your lovemaking between your legs and his, of breath and hushed voices and tender kisses. He took his time riding out your orgasm, in no hurry to take himself out of you. Nanami gently guided you back onto the now missed blankets of the bed and rolled you both on your side, facing each other so that he could look into your eyes and find your reaction, your look of blissed-out euphoria. No longer did he carry the guilt of moving on, of taking another woman into his bed. You made him feel comfortable and secure, and he wasn't sure words could convey his gratitude.

You spent the afternoon dozing, eating, drinking wine and toeing along the sand, totally immersed in his company. The last few weeks of your visit were spent in his company as well, the days just as magical as the nights.

And when it came time for you to return home, he took you to dinner, a hopeful look in his eyes as you discussed the possibility of returning each summer. You knew that the chances were slim– you explained that the house where you had stayed wasn't yours to rent, that your best friend had arranged the whole thing.

He reached across the table and covered your hand with his. "Come and stay with me." Ah, his way of presenting ideas was direct and to the point. It was something you'd come to admire about him– how no nonsense he was when it had to do with something he cared deeply about.

Your expression softened when you considered the possibility. You hadn't been hopeful of a love connection when you took this trip, and you had to be honest with him– you still weren't sure you were ready for another full-fledged commitment just yet. The wound of your divorce was still fresh, still painful, and you wanted to spend some more time getting to know the woman you were without your ex-husband, without the baggage you'd carried around for so long.

And when you divulged this to him, he drew back his hand, taking a long drink from his glass. "We don't have to do anything you don't want to do." He threw your own words right back at you, and you had to smile. "I enjoy your company regardless."

Your daughter was overjoyed the day you pulled into her father's driveway. She came skipping out of his house and you caught her in your arms, spinning her around in a tight, tearful hug. Your ex husband stared at you and smiled softly in a way that told you he saw a difference in your demeanor.

"Restful vacation?" he asked, his jealousy barely masked.

"Oh, you have no idea."

#nanami kento x reader #jjk x reader #nanami x you

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pablitogavii · 1 year

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Can you do one where reader’s (old boy bsf w his family )best friend, comes to pay her a visit at her parents house when she’s hanging out with the team,family (her and Pablo)and wags, and they’re all having a nice dinner out in the garden and the best friends, mom says “oh we really thought though __ and yn we’re going to end up together since they were little kids” & his sister also mentions “yea I’m still said she won’t be my sister in law and the team,wags Gavis family gets so mad, and gavi gets insecure so the wags and teammates and his family reassure him, and when they get home reader shows him that she only wants him.(something like that. )

I saw similar request at another writer's post, so I will try my best to make it uniquely mine because I am against copying other's work. So I'll change up a request a little, but still hope you will enjoy the story.

Thank you for the request!

They were champions of LaLiga after four years of hard work, sacrifices and determination. It was also Pablo's very first title playing for the first Barça team, so he decided to throw a not so little barbecue party at his family home inviting only his friends, teammates and their significant others.

You were of course first on his list, as his own girl and as you always say 'biggest fan' hehe. You were so proud of Pablo for not giving up even when people started saying he is 'overrated' and 'worse midfielder Barça had'. He kept his head up, his focus sharp and he deserved this title.

"Amor, do you want red or blue napkins?" you came from the kitchen showing him each color and he smiled pointing at red before saying he 'needs your help' with something.

"Let me just give these to mamá and I'll be right there cariño" you said and it warmed Pablo's heart to hear you call his mother 'mamá' knowing how much Belen loved you for her son.

"What is it cariño??" you came towards the grill and Pablo smirked pulling your waist behind the wall and into the secluded corner before attaching his lips to your hungrily.

"That was it..thank you so much amorcito" he smiled with his forehead against your and you smiled wide with your cheeks blushed feeling happier than you ever did in your life.

"Y/n!" Aurora's voice interrupted your voice and Pablo rolled his eyes making you giggle at his exaggerated response. He loved having ALL your attention ALL the time!

"I seriously feel jealous of my family for loving you as much as I do!" he said and you chuckled pecking his lips one more time while caressing his cheek softly.

"You have all my heart Gavinho, don't worry.." you wink at him walking to see what Aurora needed while he looked after you for a few moments thinking to himself how he got so lucky to have you in his life.

"Your brother might kill you for interrupting our moment hermanita" you joked and Aurora rolled her eyes reminding you that she was indeed Pablo's sister, they are quite similar to those who know them both.

"There are people at the door asking for you??" she said and you furrowed your eyebrows wondering who it could be since your parents were traveling for work and you don't know anybody else who knows Pablo's address.

"You know how to ruin romantic moments Rora!" Pablo snarled at her while working on the grill with his dad and when she told him someone came to see you, he got curious as well but didn't give it much thought.

You came to the door and when you opened it, you were in utter shock to see your high school ex boyfriend and his family smiling back at you.

He was a definition of 'toxic boyfriend' always limiting and trying to control everything you do. You found out some months after the break up that he was even continuously cheating on you because you weren't ready to sleep with him yet.

"Paul? What? What are you doing here? Didn't you stay in Valencia after high school?" you said and he smiled walking up to give you a tight hug like you were the bestest of friends and you just politely hugged him back before moving back.

"I came to Barcelona for a summer break, and wanted to take a chance to apologize for the way I treated you..I was a kid and I realize that now..I've changed Y/n" he said and you felt so uncomfortable first that he was here at all but then that he brought his mother and sister with him probably knowing that they were always so kind to you and you respected them tremendously.

"Um..that' okay. Water under the bridge, it's in the past..How..how did you know where I'm at?" you said and he smiled looking you up and down shamelessly making you that much more uncomfortable.

"You became quite a little celebrity shortie..fan accounts tagged being here to get autographs from footballers and I just used my sources" he said and you wondered if he knew how creepy he sounded.

"No, my BOYFRIEND is a celebrity..I'm just happy to be here with him" you made sure you highlight on the fact that you were no longer single and that this visit was uncalled for.

"Right, the Golden Boy Pablo Gavi...but come on, he is a famous footballer, you are surely one of many in his house shortie" Paul smirked and you felt like slamming door into his face for disrespecting you yet again, looks like people can't change after all!

"Would we be able to come in?? I'm parched from how hot it is outside??" his mother interrupted my thinking and you knew this was the wrong time and that you didn't want him anywhere near you again but the lady was older and you couldn't get yourself to refuse letting them come inside.

Belen helped his mom and sister to the kitchen offering them some water seeing that they were both sweaty and tired probably from walking on the sun.

"Nice house shortie! You got yourself a cash cow!" he said looking around Pablo's family house and you felt disgusted that he just assumed that's why you were with Pablo.

"This is Pablo's family's house...um we live in a small apartment across from Camp Nou" you said in your defense not knowing why you were even trying to defend yourself to someone like this.

A bell rang interrupting your thoughts and Paul said he will make himself at home which made your stomach flip wishing he could just leave.

You opened the door to Pedri, Ansu, Ferran and Sira, and Rafa and Taia looking confused that you were not happy but worried instead.

"Hey, amiga. Everything alright?? Don't tell me Gavi burned the grill?" Ansu said and you gave him a weak smile saying that everything is fine.

"If someone messed with our hija, Imma beat his ass!" Rafa said while Taia hugged you and you smiled knowing that they always called you their 'fake daughter' because of how often you babysit for them and how kind you are to help Taia while being pregnant.

"Here for you to talk always" Pedri reminded you and you thanked him welcoming the all into the garden swallowing hard when you saw Paul talking to Pablo by the grill. What the hell was he telling him!?

"Um, I'm sorry for not introducing you cariño..this is Paul..um he came to visit Barcelona with his family..and..um" Pablo noticed that you were nervous knowing the whole story himself about this guy who did nothing short of disrespecting his girl and mistreating her.

"He's welcome to stay if he wishes, no worries mi princesa linda..let's go get our friends drinks huh? Excuse us, man" Pablo kissed you in reassurance and you loved that it was in front of Paul shutting him up for good.

Throughout the night, the Gavira house became a true little fiesta, with all the players including the best coach in the word (Xavi Hernandez) singing and dancing all together.

Pablo was sitting besides Pedri chatting about the rest of the season, and you noticed Paul from the corner of your eyes staring at your ass while his mother and sister (bless their soul) were really kind and talked to Pablo's parents.

You walked to your boyfriend feeling very uncomfortable that anybody but him was looking you like that, sitting on his leg while his arms wrapped protectively around you and Pedri asked if he should leave playfully.

"Shut up Pepi!" you messed up his hair making them both laugh not expecting to hear "which one do you want shortie??" from Paul that made everyone uncomfortable once again before leaving to get another drink like he was invited.

"Um..no..she is like a hermanita to me" Pedri quickly said feeling attacked and not wanting his friend to ever think he would do something like that not to mention that everyone here knew that you were in love with Pablo and that you would never hurt each other.

"When will he leave???" you laid your head on Pablo's shoulder while he was giving the guy death glares hating him for ruining this night for his girl and for everyone else.

Pablo was raised to respect everyone who comes into his home and he doesn't have it in him to throw someone out he invited to stay no matter how badly he wanted to do just that. Not to mention that the douchebag on purpose brought his family to make this whole thing as complicated as possible.

"Pablo! Y/n! Can you come here queridos??" Belen said and the two of you walked to the group of older people sitting on the couches talking with Paul's family.

Pablo sat down on the open chair as his mom gave him a look (she raised a gentleman) but when she saw he was pulling you onto his lap, she smiled at the both of you.

"Señora said you were getting engaged to her son in high school?" Pablo's dad said and both you and Pablo said "what!?" at the same exact time.

"He kept saying he was going to marry her after school..and I thought it was going to happen..I would have been so happy to have her as my daughter in law" woman spoke truly oblivious of all the things her son did to you being fed only lies by him.

"She would be best sister in law!" his little sister grabbed your hand and you smiled at the kid knowing it's not her fault and that this whole situation was orchestrated by that manipulative liar who was getting drunk at the bar now.

"Is this true?" Pablo whispered to you and you were shocked that he could even consider that you would not tell him something so big about your past when you promised to always be honest with one another.

"Of course not Pablo! I don't know what he said to them..but I never wanted to marry him and we were never engaged" you said but Pablo was so sick of this whole thing slowly getting up and excusing himself.

"Pablo!" you called after him but he didn't turn around making you sit down with tearful eyes hating that Paul could still ruin things in your life like this.

"Hey, don't cry..Pablo is impulsive, you know that but he doesn't love anyone like he loves you..he believes you hermanita" Aurora came to hug you and you did your best not to cry knowing you needed to set things straight with everyone.

"Señora, I don't know what Paul told you..but we were never engaged and he did not treat me well..he even cheated on me with many other girls..slapped me once and never let me be happy..I was never going to marry your son and I think he wanted to get back at me for leaving him which is why he brought you here..lied to you..and used my respect towards you to break up my relationship" you said to the lady who was in utter shock at your words.

"Mi hija pobresita, I am very sorry señora..I know you must be a lovely lady but I am going to ask you to take your son and leave my house. This is a private party and we don't want to cause any trouble" Pablo's dad was by your side kissing the top of your head reassuring you that everyone believed you and that you were no longer alone.

"Too late papi.." Rora said pointing at the bar as everyone turned to look at what was the commotion about.

When Pablo came to the bar, Lewy sat besides him giving him a beer while asking what got his so riled up. He opened up to the older man who reminded him that there are self centered people in the world who are only happy when they make other people miserable.

"I don't want to imagine her being anybody else's wife but mine Lewa.." Pablo admitted taking a large sip of beer feeling the man's hand on his shoulder.

"And I know that she only wants to be Mrs. Pablo Gavira.." Lewa said seeing Pablo smiling lightly thinking about your future and seeing you in that white dress before him.

"Pablo..Paul..close enough" and those words made all hell break loose when Pablo grabbed his collar and pinned him angrily against the bar while everyone watched.

"Pablo!" his father rushed asking all the women to move back while all the guys pulled the two boys apart but not before each had a chance to throw a few punches.

When everything calmed down and Paul's family was escorted out by Belen together with him, you went to Pablo's bedroom where he sat on his bed inspecting a cut on his cheek.

"Hola..can I come in?" you said and he looked up at you with tearful eyes while nodding his head as you sat on his lap hugging him tightly.

"I'm sorry cariño..I shouldn't have let them come inside..I promise that he lied..there is only one man I ever thought about marrying and that's you.." you spoke tears finally escaping your eyes wetting his shirt and he pulled you close letting his figners dry your tears softly.

"I believe you princesa..and I'm sorry for losing my temper..again" he said knowing that you must have been terrified when the fight broke having bad memories about Paul getting violent.

"I'm just glad he didn't hurt you badly.." you said touching his cut inspecting how deep it was but thankfully in was only superficial.

"I'm okay linda..don't worry about me..and this is the first time I fought for you.." he smirked and you rolled your eyes at his comment taking some gauze to clean up some of the dried up blood.

"Ouch!" he said and you moved the gauze looking into his playful smile chuckling yourself now that the whole situation was over.

"Lewa said you talked about me being your wife??" you said and he nodded proudly looking at your lips yearningly having missed them in the last half an hour.

"Give me besitos linda..I deserve them after fighting for my future wife" he said smartly and you chuckled nodding your head before leaving down and placing your lips onto his careful not to touch his cut.

"We should head back down and join the others cariño??" you said after a few minutes of making out that ended up with you laying on his bed and him hovering above you.

"But you are all mine when we get home princesita??" he said and you blushed nodding your head in agreement before the two of you headed downstairs to re-join the party being welcomed by a large applause.

"Can I just say a few words?" Belen said and everyone went quite while Pablo's arms wrapped around you.

"Having this beautiful angel join our family is such a blessing for the Gavira home. My son is a good man he will treat you right, and you love him more every day..oh and you are only my future daughter in law! Cheers!" Belen cheered and everyone laughed making Pablo blush and you kissed his red cheeks cheering with everyone.

"Yo te quiero cariño.." you whispered after taking a sip of wine and he smiled nodding his head leaning down to place his lips to your lovingly.

"Yo tambien the quiero mucho princesa" he said into the kiss resting his forehead against yours feeling like the luckiest guy on the planet <33

Hope you liked! I know it's different but I did my best to make it unique!

#pablo gavi #pablo gavi icons #pablo gavi x reader #pablo gavi x y/n #pablo gavi x you #fc barca #fc barcelona #fc barça #gavi #gavigif #pablo martín páez gavira #pablo gavira #pablo gavi imagine #pablo gavi x reader smut

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sugarybitterness · 2 years

Text

can you lie to a russian assassin? (no you can’t) - wandanat x daughter!r

series masterlist

word count; 2,665

a/n; more of scarletwidow life lessons!! i got a little carried away with this ngl👺 anygays,, here is where we see more of their relationship develop~ shoutout to my lovely friends in the marvel server for shooting out some ideas for this as well:] as usual inbox is open for requests for this au or just general chattin && feedback is always appreciated <3 enjoy some mama!wandanat y’all 🫶🏻

the last month at the compound has by far been the best ever since your parents’ death. for once, you two were in an environment where you were safe and had people who genuinely cared for your wellbeing.

old habits die hard though, especially for you. ellie was a couple months shy of a year old when when your parents passed away. you two were placed into a foster home that turned out to be a pair of hydra agents in disguise. their task was to foster as many kids as possible and weed out the ones they felt was best suited for hydra’s new programmes. you had been suspicious of them ever since stepping foot in the house, they barely cared for any of the children and you often had the responsibility of taking care of your sister.

after a couple months of being in their foster care, they adopted you both legally just so they could send you off to the hidden labs. with ellie being one, they focused on helping her develop her basic skills.

you, having got your basic motor skills at least, got the brunt of any physical training, which in turn came with punishments and pain. the scientists in charge of ellie’s general care and your mental developement had grown a soft spot for you two which you were grateful for as they were rarely physical with either of you. you were even more thankful that the avengers raided the base when they did, because the guards had mentioned starting ellie’s physical training since she had just turned four.

so yes, the last three years had been far from easy.

on the first night, you barely slept. as comfortable as the large bed was, you just refused to let yourself rest in fear that someone would come take ellie away in the night. the door creaking open had you quickly shutting your eyes, feigning sleep.

natasha took note of how uneven your breathing was compared to ellie’s but decided against commenting on it. instead she purposefully made her steps louder as she left the room and headed off for her morning workout. when you hear the footsteps fade away, you opened your eyes to survey your surroundings again shifting ellie closer to you, you attempted to keep watch a little longer but ultimately sleep overtook you.

you’re were awakened a few hours later by ellie shaking you. her round doe eyes looked up at you as she asked if there’s any food. usually you’d be back from whatever “payment” the guards have you do with food before ellie even wakes up. there might be no more guards here to hurt you, but you’re still apprehensive. and while they had given you food the night before just like that, you mentally prepared yourself just in case. hand in hand, the two of you headed out of the room, only to walk straight into natasha. the redhead had her hair in her usual braid, her workout clothes traded in for a more casual attire.

“oh good, you’re up. wanda is making breakfast.” natasha smiled at you two, gesturing for you to follow her. when she doesn’t hear your footsteps, she turns back around.

“if.. if we’re required to do anything for breakfast i can do it for both me and ellie..” you trailed off uncertainly as you look up at her, feeling a little unnerved by her unreadable gaze.

natasha stood there for a moment, many alarm bells going off in her head. she doesn’t even want to wonder what you had been asked to do, so she quickly compartmentalizes that thought for later. she goes to take a step forward but stops when you quickly step backwards. “you don’t have to do anything okay? not anymore.”

“but food is expensive.. i have to pay off the debt no?” you questioned, but relax slightly at the thought of not needing to do any of the things you were used to.

“no debt. you need food to stay healthy, you’re a kid malysh. you deserve to be taken care of. now come, let’s see what wanda is making.”

the rest of the month progress in a similar fashion. both of you are given proper baths everyday, not just the usual quick rinse with cold water you had become accustomed to, which didn’t even happen daily. natasha is constantly reminding you two that if either of you needed anything, you could just ask. while you remain hesitant on asking for things, ellie has almost no reservations.

while everything seemed to be going good, you were getting worried that ellie might be getting attached. the scientists teaching ellie had kept a cold distance, meaning you were the one giving her any kind of physical love and affection. now, ellie had both natasha and wanda too. the little girl had clearly taken a liking to the redhead, going to her with any of her requests and natasha granting most if not all of them.

to natasha, ellie was asking for the most basic things a child should have so she had no issues indulging her. while it worried her a bit that you still seemed so reserved, she never quite knew how to break you out of your shell. it definitely did not help that ellie took up most of her attention. ever since natasha had introduced the younger kid to all the toys tony bought, she spent more time playing dolls and colouring than doing paperwork.

however, natasha knew that wanda was making small but steady progress with you. while ellie had gotten into a habit of asking natasha for things, wanda relied on observing you for any cues that might indicate what you wanted. the first time you had breakfast with them, you had finished everything but barely touched the bacon. after some coaxing from wanda, she found out that you hadn’t enjoyed the greasy texture of it. you had expected to be reprimanded but wanda simply took the plate away and gave you another serving of eggs and toast. wanda had also noticed you took a liking to the various kid books provided by tony. so while natasha was colouring with ellie, wanda would sit with you on the couch nearby with her own book in hand. you never mentioned it but you always liked having her nearby, wanda emitted a sort of calmness that you were slowly getting used to.

the two adults were definitely glad to see the both of you settling in at the compound. moreso, they realised how much they enjoyed watching you two flourish. their previous night time discussions usually revolved work or any team gossip, but now they often found their topic of conversation to be about the two young girls down the hall from them.

one night, wanda confesses to natasha that she’s worried she can’t let go.

“i just.. i don’t think i can see them go tasha. i know it’s only been a month but, oh i don’t know. they’re good kids tasha, they deserve to be loved and taken care of. i just don’t think i can trust anyone to give them what they deserve.”

natasha, much to wanda’s relief, shares a similar sentiment. so after some more discussion, they decide that they’ll fully draft out the needed documents to make you two their children.

natasha decides now would be a good time to get the truth out of you. she knows that you’re much younger than you say are, the documents all prove it. but, she knows that you saying you’re older is a way of protecting yourself and ellie. which she aims to change because you are still a child.

natasha decides to try the straightforward method. at breakfast she asks you for your age, an eyebrow raised as if daring you to lie.

you know she knows, or at least you assume she does. but you’re stubborn and a part of you worries that by telling her your true age, you’ll be sent away. ellie is younger, she needs more guidance and care. why would the two avengers keep two kids when one would be easier?

you lie easily, telling her you’re turning 12, when in reality you’re only 7. natasha narrows her eyes at you and you avoid her gaze, picking at your food instead.

“you know.. lying isn’t very good malysh.” natasha hums and your grip on the fork tightens.

“well, i am eleven right now so. not lying.” you try and shrug nonchalantly but both the adults can tell it was forced. wanda places a hand on natasha’s shoulder, shaking her head slightly and the redhead drops the subject.

wanda chooses to try a different approach. she sits with you as she sorts out the books on the floor, picking out a book meant for slightly older children. she turns to pass it to you but notices you have a whole dictionary on your lap. she looks closer and realises that it’s russian, causing her eyes to widen in surprise.

your eyes skim through the pages as you try and find the particular words you wanted. ah, there it was.

malysh - baby

milaya - darling

your brows furrow at that. you had been curious as to what the adults had been calling you both, you were often called malysh while ellie was called milaya. you had assumed it was some sort of term for child, or girl, but you didn’t think it’d be a term of endearment.

“malysh what you looking at?” wanda’s sweet voice causes you to close the book hurriedly as you look up at her.

“nothing! i’m sorry i-“

“woah hey it’s okay malysh,” wanda is quick to soothe you. “you’re alright, yeah? just surprised because i didn’t think a dictionary would be your first choice in books.” wanda laughs a little and you feel yourself relax.

“i just wanted to understand the names you’ve been calling us, that’s all.” you shyly admit and wanda is barely able to contain the way she melts at your adorable expression.

“well, did you manage to find it?” wanda queries and you nod in response.

“i’m not a baby though.” you state, lips curled into a slight pout. “i’m a big girl and i can be useful.”

wanda sighs a little and pats the spot next to her. after some slight hesitation you shuffle over.

“it doesn’t matter if you’re a baby or not. you’re still a child okay? you deserve to be taken care of properly. we want you here because we care about you, not because we want something out of you. understood?” wanda gaze is fixed on you and you stare back at her as you processes what she said. you nod your head again slowly, assuming that is the ideal answer. your eyes dart over to the books and you end up picking one randomly before walking over to settle next to ellie at the coffee table.

ellie turns to look at you and shoots you a toothy grin as she shows off her latest coloring.

“look! tasha and wan!” the four year old giggles happily when you praise her work. she turns back around and begins to work on another project.

“would you like to color?” natasha offers but you shake your head. you try to start reading your book but something feels a little .. missing. you look up and around the room before you see wanda at the kitchen island on her laptop. you frown a little and you have a little mental debate in your mind. maybe, just maybe, you could try and see if they really mean they say.

“wanda?” you call out tentatively and the brunette’s attention is immediately switched onto you.

“yes malysh?”

you pat the space next to you in a silent question and wanda practically beams at you. she takes her laptop and sits at her spot next to you. now content that everyone was together, you went back to your book. wanda and natasha share a look, both of them pleased when they see a small smile on your face.

natasha continues to try and get you to reveal your true age. she’s exhausted almost every trick she’s seen laura do (and has done herself) on the barton kids.

she’s tried bribery, but it backfired pretty quickly with your past. you had been picking a book and natasha picked one that was meant for 6-8 year olds and offered it to you. the general storyline had piqued your interest enough, but just as you reached to take it from you natasha had brought it towards her. coming up with something along the lines of “oh aren’t you a little too old for the book? since you’re 11?” you had kept quiet, still eyeing the book so she tried to take it up a notch.

“or, are you much younger than you said? if you tell me, i’ll give you the book.” she had expected you to either argue back, or come clean but instead you stood up and made your way where wanda was preparing lunch. natasha watched, a little dumbfounded, as you clamber up onto the bar stool. she wasn’t sure what you two talked about but she received a slight glare from her girlfriend, red wisps grabbing the book from her grasp and floating it over to you. you accepted it with a quiet thank you to wanda before you started to read.

natasha tries the same thing again when tony sends in another shipment of toys. this time being enough stuffed animals for the girls to have their own zoo. ellie is quick to sort through the toys before picking one, holding it close to her. natasha observes you looking and sees the way your gaze is trained on a specific animal. she settles next to you and grabs it, your gaze flits from the toy to natasha.

“is this the one you like malysh?” natasha questions. your teeth pulls at your lower lip, your stare jumping between the stuffed animal and the redhead.

“if i say yes, do i get it or will you ask how old am i again?” you counter, absentmindedly fiddling with your fingers.

natasha gapes at you for a bit before sighing. she mulls over her thoughts before she begins to speak.

“look, i know you know that i know. truthfully, i don’t mind you lying to me. because i get it. being older makes you stronger, makes it safer, right?” natasha pauses and you nod hesitantly, keeping your head down.

“i’m a big girl. no one..” you take in a shaky breath before continuing. “no one wants a baby, much less two. and you already have ellie, so, that means i’m a big girl.”

“well i’m not no one, am i? wanda and i, we want this. we want you, malysh. both of you.” your head snaps up at that, your big eyes looking up at her. natasha chuckles softly as she places the stuffed toy in your lap. “we’ve talked about it and well.. we just don’t think we can let you go.”

“so we stay?” you ask, eyes glossing over with tears. “here? with you and wanda?”

“if that’s what you want malysh then yes. you are both our babies, you know? not just ellie.” natasha reiterates, one hand slowly going to wipe away your tears.

you swallow the lump in your throat as you continue to cry silently, your fingers tangling in the soft fur of the toy in your lap. safe. you two were finally safe.

“i turn 8 at the end of the year.” you whisper softly, peering up at natasha through your eyelashes. natasha’s smile broadens at your words, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of your head.

“thank you malysh. i promise you that wanda and i will always protect you. no one will ever hurt you, or ellie, again. not on our watch.”

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