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#but i am putting a lot of trust in the writers to make this have a point
dangaer · 1 year
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haven't said it enough but man, i do love ocs.
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mecub · 2 months
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It is past 1am and I am thinking about @somerandomdudelmao’s Marble Sky, and this lightly bonked my writers block on the head for long enough that I wrote a little thing.
The world is green. Green, bleeding from the lights and from his insides and from the space where—
Ward wakes up shaking, crumpled on the floor like an old paper someone couldn’t be bothered to throw away. 
The world. Is green. Green and pretty, green with plants and vines, but for a moment something inside of him screams like something’s clamped over his mouth and his blood is burning and—
But it’s not green like that. Here, the green isn’t the immediate threat. The threat is one of them, bigger than him and probably put there to make sure he doesn’t try to escape.
“Oh. You aren’t dead,” the alien says.
That’s… not reassuring. But also not the threat he’d been expecting?
“Are you by any chance one of the talking ones?”
Something is wrong. Everything is blurry, and when he goes to rub his eyes, he finds gauze and okay, that. That is going to be a problem for later. Once he’s safe. Once he can let panic overwhelm him without the lack of attention putting him at risk of—
“I am,” he says.
“Cool. So they found another civilization to destroy. Hungry?”
Them. Like this alien, this alien who looks so much like them, doesn’t trust them. 
It’s ridiculous, but at this point? Ward just wishes he could’ve just been thrown in a normal prison cell. Just one normal, reasonable thing that made sense would’ve been nice. And yet, he’s sitting in vegetable prison with someone who might be an ally but is also probably very much not anyone Ward can trust. How does someone even end up in vegetable prison?
“What’s with all these greens?” he asks, because he can’t just demand answers. “Are you in jail for being the only vegetarian here or something?”
Good ole sarcasm. A great way to be eaten by aliens! Hey, maybe they consider humans a vegetable.
“You’re radiating negative energy at me.”
No shit. “Wanna guess why?”
“Hey, I’m not with those— Wait!”
Uh oh.
“You said greens! You know what color is?”
Um?
“You must have eyes!” And then the alien moves towards him, without a second thought, like they know anything he does, running away or fighting or yelling for help, won’t do anything. Ward flinches away from their outstretched hand. 
(An outstretched hand, moving towards his neck, slicing him open like the specimen he was. An outstretched hand, with his blood on it, and he couldn’t move couldn’t fight it couldn’t—)
“Yes. So?” he snaps.
“Can I touch you?”
“Wh— No.” No.
“Please,” the alien says, “I won’t hurt you. I swear.”
Ward… could try saying no again. He could try to move away, try to talk about this, try to save himself from whatever’s going to happen. He wants to, he really wants to.
But. Sculptor didn’t listen, didn’t care, he just cut into him with a smile. And this one is larger than him, and they said they wouldn’t hurt him, they swore it, they asked for a favor, they look desperate, so maybe, maybe he’ll be safe. Maybe this will keep the alien from dropping whatever this act of an ally is.
The world is green, and Ward reaches out a hand and says, “Here. Happy?”
And the alien reaches out a hand and— 
And lightly touches his. Gently. 
The world is green. And in the middle of it is someone who looks a lot like him.
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I was given oral herpes by someone who didn't feel the need to disclose that they got cold sores before we had a one-time little dalliance.
I might've gone for it anyways. I'm self destructive. But I guess the lack of being able to choose whether to take the risk, it's left me feeling pretty bitter about the experience.
And I'm left feeling like a biohazard. I haven't really been able to explain to my friends yet why I'm suddenly extremely cagey about sharing my drinks and food. And all my favorite sexual activities are off the table forever. I know, dental dams, condoms, but half the fun of oral sex and making out is, you know, the taste, the heat, the absolute control. I was good at it.
It feels especially embarrassing since I'm ace and the whole reason I hooked up with the person was kind of... I don't know, fear that if I didn't, then we wouldn't be able to hang out anymore.
I'm not sure what I'm asking. Maybe, was it wrong for them not to disclose something like that? Considering how common it is? I feel obligated to disclose myself but maybe I'm just weird for that.
Thanks for doing what you do here.
Kind regards,
Asexual for Ethical Reasons Now I Guess
hi anon,
I don't often apologize for needing time to get to anons, because I really need people to have reasonable expectations about the amount of time I'm willing to commit to my inbox, but I am sorry for not getting to this one sooner. it's a topic that's very important to me, and I can tell you're dealing with a lot of hurt.
first off: I'm very sorry someone wasn't totally honest with you. that's never a good feeling, and especially in the context of sex it's a huge betrayal of trust. it's deeply unfair to you, and I hope you're able to recover from that.
having said that: you are not a biohazard. you're a person with an incredibly common virus. the World Health Organization estimates that somewhere around 80% of people worldwide have herpes (and that's a rough estimate, since they use different age ranges for HSV-1 and HSV-2). skip to the factual part of this tiktok at 00:10 seconds. herpes has been with us since before we were human; there's nothing disgusting or even unusual about having herpes.
herpes is different from most STIs in that it is lifelong, but that doesn't make you an unfuckable pariah. it makes you someone who may sometimes have open sores, and should give partners a heads up about your virus to avoid putting anyone in the same situation you're in. while you're at it, let them know that most people with herpes live asymptomatic and uncomplicated lives. many people never even know they have it!
I understand that spending the rest of your life with a viral buddy doesn't sound super fun right now, but I promise that as viruses go you can do WAY worse.
personally I've always felt the best way to get comfortable with something is to learn more about it. why not let clinical sexologist Dr. Doe talk to you about her own herpes, and how to be conscientious about minimizing the risk of sharing herpes with others?
youtube
youtube
or listen to writer Ella Dawson talk about learning to cope with the exact stigma you're currently struggling with?
or listen to Dr. Sydnee Smirl McElroy explain why herpes bears such a heavy stigma for such a mild virus in the first place?
you're not a biohazard, and neither is anyone else with an STI. that's a terrible way to think about yourself and others.
you're under no obligation to stop being sexually active if you don't want to be.
please don't feel that you have to have sex with anyone out of a sense of obligation anymore, but also please don't feel that herpes is a punishment. sickness isn't something that happens to people because they're bad or deserve, sickness happens to people because people get sick.
take care 💜
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simphornies · 4 months
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A/N: Thanks to some help from a wonderful writer ( @markster666 my new writer bestie ) this story might be longer than I think. Filled with a lot of emotions. I can't wait for you all to see what we've come up with.
Word count: 4.2k (4,240)
part 1, part 3, part 4
Deal Breaker [ Vox x Angel!Reader ] part 2
His second day was filled with the same trust exercises that Vaggie did earlier on. Vox and the other guests were thrown into another turf war once again to fight alongside each other. Alastor decided to join this time around, seeking entertainment in Vox's attempt at the exercise.
Vaggie hoisted Vox up into the air and threw him down the building. You watched over them, making sure that they don't get too injured. Alastor walks next to you, tapping his microphone as he watches Vox get punched in the stomach and saved by Angel Dust.
"Y/N, my dear, do you truly believe that this 'courtship' is real and not some frivolous stunt?" He asks, "I have grown accustomed to your friendship and it'd be a shame if he pulled strings to whisk you away from us and the hotel."
"To be quite frank with you, Alastor, I am not quite sure myself. Rest assured that I shall have my wits up." You put a hand on his shoulder, "I will not fall for meager attempts or tricks."
He hummed, "I rarely share this advice but do stay safe, darling. I will not find entertainment in failure from you. And I would hate to be disappointed in failure."
Though Alastor is...Alastor, you two have formed a bond. With you working to free him from his chains and him providing you with insight on how Hell functions, you became close friends. As sadistic as he is, he truly wished you good fortune.
You hear a scream coming from below and you quickly fly down to the source. Vox got surrounded and a demon managed to land a hit on him, stabbing him through his side. You opened up your wings fully to create distance and whisked him back up, blasting the perpetrators away with light. You gently sat him on the ground, kneeling beside him.
"Vox, where did they get you?" You ask in a hurry, trying to find the source of the bleeding. His side was covered in blood. "Take your shirt off, let me heal you."
"Take my shirt off? You want to see me naked that bad?" He weakly laughed, his screen glitching due to the pain, "And you can heal too? Hah. What can't you do, angel?"
"Now is not the time for jokes. Take your shirt off or I will rip it off of you." Your voice was stern, making him unbutton his shirt. You applied your magic to close off the wound and stop the bleeding. "My powers can only close wounds and stop bleeding. The pain will be there so take it easy."
You stood up, "I think that's enough. Let's all go home." And with a snap of your fingers, you all were transported back to the hotel through a portal.
"Vox is injured. No sudden or rash jerks to him until he's recovered. My magic's sped up the healing so he should be fine tonight. Alastor, no punching the injured please." He squinted at you in disappointment to which Vox flipped him off.
Charlie was apologizing profusely to Vox, offering him every kind of drink or snack that the hotel had. Vaggie drags her away so you can deal with him. You sat next to him at the bar, "A drink?"
"Yeah. That'd be great. Shit hurts like a bitch." He got a glass of rum from Husk and you got the same. Vox looked at you, a little bit in disbelief before smiling. "Thanks for saving my ass, angel."
"Do stop calling me that. But you're welcome." You chug your drink rather quickly, impressing Vox.
"Rum tonight huh? What made you decide to switch it up?"
"Mm. You." You smiled at him before asking Husk for the whole bottle and he gladly handed it to you. You and him clinked your bottles together before you pour it into your glass. Vox caught himself blushing at your response but he quickly wiped it off of his face.
He couldn't think of how to keep the conversation going so he drank in silence. He stared at the ice floating in his drink, messing with it with his claws.
"I have something to discuss with you Vox. In private." You say before getting up, face flushed from the stronger alcohol. "Please, meet me in my room after your drink." You take the bottle with you as you teleport into your room.
Angel elbows him on his good side, "Oooooh~ The angel's tryna fuck." He teased making Vox glitch a bit.
"Fuck! You! Don't jump out like that. Where did you come from?" He groaned before getting up, taking his glass with him. "It's probably business."
He walked up to your room, limping a bit from pain. He knocked on your door and entered as soon as you told him to. You sat at your desk, reading something in front of you.
"I want to discuss something and I sure do hope you consider this. Please, sit." You pointed at the seat across the table.
"Talking business early on? Are you going to agree to the deal?" He grinned mischievously, putting his hand under his chin to prop his head up on the table.
"No. It's about one of our patrons. Angel Dust." You slide a copy of his contract over to Vox, "This is a personal request of mine. I would like his contract, his deal with Valentino, to be terminated."
He was taken aback at your boldness. "Oh shit, okay. Well..." He leaned back, sucking air through his teeth somehow, "Yeah...I'm not sure, angel cakes. Valentino is pretty possessive over who he owns."
"I understand but I am willing to form a deal of some sort with you to get this to happen. Please, give me offers in exchange for this favor." You looked at him pleadingly. After seeing Angel Dust get hit and insulted by Valentino at the bar stirred something in you and you promised to find a way to break his deal.
Vox perks up at this opportunity. "A deal to break another deal?" He laughs, "You don't start small with your offers, do you?" He sat and pondered a bit.
"I'll accept your deal and get Valentino to break the contract on the condition that you make a deal with me."
You noticed his left eye beginning to spiral. Was he trying to hypnotize you? You laugh at the attempt, "Sorry. I'm not laughing at the offer but are you trying to hypnotize me?" His facial expression changes at the realization that he got caught. "That doesn't work on me, unfortunately for you. But what condition are you looking for?"
He retreats his attempt in shame, crossing his arms a bit. "Worth a shot." He huffed, “But I want you to work with me for the same length that you have me here. 3 days. And on top of that I want 3 dates with you. Let’s make a deal with that and I promise you that I’ll try to get Valentino to break his contract.”
You extend your hand out to him and he shakes it, sealing both of your words into a contract. He grins, knowing that he left out what exactly you have to do with him in his company. But a new feeling bubbled within him. The moment he held your hand he felt sparks in his system. He felt himself heating up with such a simple gesture and he couldn’t shake the feeling even hours after it had happened.
Hours had passed after your deal with him and at this point everybody was already fast asleep except for him. He couldn’t forget the way your hand felt in his. He paced around his room anxiously, trying to pinpoint the source of this pit he felt in his chest and stomach. He tried to distract himself with the technology provided in his room but every now and then he’d stare at the hand that held yours. Vox would replay the way you swooped in to take him away from danger and heal you. Your words echoed in his head over and over. Your smile slowly became a goal for him to maintain.
On his third and final day at the hotel, it was a party. Everyone wanted to go to the same bar Angel Dust and Cherri Bomb took the hotel staff to when Charlie was out. Alastor opted out of this because of “proximity reasons” or so he said. It was you, Vox, Husk, and Angel going this time.
You dressed yourself into an outfit that wasn’t the usual “I’m the famous angel that fought for Hell” look. Instead you wore shorts, courtesy of Angel Dust, and a crop top that Cherri gifted you a while ago. You were indecisive on which boots to wear and with Alastor off doing something you probably didn’t want to know about, you called Angel Dust.
He stood in your room as you frantically gathered all the shoes you owned and dropped them in front of the two demons. “I am not one to typically go out but I will absolutely not go out looking a mess. Please help me.” You practically begged. Angel helped you put together your outfit, fixing your hair up into a ponytail. He was proud of how you looked in the end.
The two of you walked to the lobby, chatting and laughing about how you can’t style yourself outside of your comfort zone. Vox stared at you, engulfed in your beauty. He was not used to seeing you outside of your usual attire and he was stunned. He couldn’t pry his eyes off of you and he was convinced it was purely due to your angelic powers. You wore black heels with eyes on the back, a shredded crop top that had a spray painted eye in the middle of it and simple black shorts. It was simple enough for you to be comfortable in but, in Angel’s words, slutty enough for you to blend in without getting immediately recognized as the angel that fought for Hell.
“Your ass looks nice in that, sweet cheeks.” Angel jokes. “I bet you’re gonna get eyes all over you at the club.”
“You flatter too much. It’s just a simple outfit, unworthy of such attention.”
But Vox agreed with him. His eyes wandered all over you. Your waist, your legs, your curves. He devoured the sight of you. It wasn’t until you made eye contact with him that he snapped out of it.
“Apologies! I was unable to settle on what to wear and if Angel hadn’t come to my rescue, I think I would have had to sit this one out.” You hugged Angel, proud of his work.
“What can I say? Sex isn’t all I’m good at.” He laughs.
You created a portal that led to the entrance of the club and the four of you immediately ordered drinks. Angel suggested drinking games and by the end of it, you were wasted. A sight that even Husk had only seen once. Your head was spinning, your vision fuzzy. Husk took another shot away from you, making you pout.
“One more shot!” Your words were slurred, “Please.”
“Absolutely not, you’re going to throw up and I am not cleaning it.” He shook his head and took your shot for you. “Shot’s gone.”
You whined and leaned into Vox’s arm, who was still sober. “Vox~ Can youuuu get me a shot?” You whispered.
Your voice sent shivers down his spine in a way he never expected. He almost caved but decided against it. “No. I think you’re done for tonight.”
You huffed and got off of him to his disappointment. You made your way onto the dance floor and uncharacteristically went all out. You followed what the crowd did and soon enough, they all lost track of you which sent them into a panic.
“Shit, where’s Y/N?” Angel asks.
“I saw her go towards all the dancing but I think she’s deep in the crowd.” Husk stated before running in there to search for you alongside Vox and Angel. Vox felt panic but he didn’t understand why. He didn’t know why he felt it urgent to get you in front of him and secure your safety. He was here to steal you from the hotel but yet he’s working with the staff to look for you. He pushed and shoved until he finally saw you. You were surrounded by three drunk demons with lust-filled eyes that danced on you a bit too sexually for his liking. The moment he saw one of them rub their hand from your hips to your waist, a fiery rage blazed within him. He quickly grabbed your hand, pulling you away from them and out of the crowd. He regrouped with Angel Dust and Husk who called Lucifer to portal them back to the hotel.
You were slumped against a flustered Vox, hugging onto his arm mumbling nonsense even after you all arrived back safely. He sat you down on the couch to which you immediately laid down.
“Wow. I haven’t seen an angel this wasted before.” Lucifer spoke, leaning over you. “Y/N, are you alright?” You giggled in response, not answering with words. “Yeah, I think she needs to go to bed. With lots of water!”
Everyone eyed your savior Vox and he groaned, “Why me?”
Alastor phased from the corner of the bar and next to him, “Because you were the one that wanted to court her. If you truly desire a relationship with someone in our staff, you should be able to take care of them as well as we do.”
Vox rolled his eyes at him, “Yeah well it wasn’t my idea to do a drinking game and get her fucked up knowing she’d lose.” He eyed Angel Dust who threw his hands up in the air, “Hey! I didn’t know her tolerance was shit. She took fifteen shots! Husk and I can handle more than that.”
“They have a point Vox. Please, take care of her for the night while the rest of us. You’re free to skip out on tonight’s activity.” Charlie says, “She likes getting tucked in.”
Vox carried you up to your room. You messed with the edges of his screen, tracing it with your finger. “So smooth.” You said. “Do you clean your screen? Can you stick your tongue out? If you can stick your tongue out, can I stick my hand in there?”
Vox was bombarded with questions but his focus was on your finger as it continuously went up and down the side of his head. He was blushing and flashed a couple of error screens until he finally got you into your room. You stumbled in and grabbed your usual dress. “Y/N, what are you doing?” He asked to which he received no response from you.
You began to take your clothes off sloppily, tripping over your own feet. Vox panicked and turned around. “Y/N! I’m still here, what in the unholy hell are you doing?” Though he was turned around, he shut his eyes for safety measures. He wasn’t one to get flustered at the sight of nakedness especially with Valentino on his team. He was confused why he felt and heard his heart pounding out of his chest.
“Yeah? If you’re here, why don’t you help me?” You whined. “Help me get into my gown.”
Vox turned and saw you on the floor, shorts stuck to your ankles and your top half off. He immediately began to scream and glitch. “Y/N!” was all he could say before he ran out of the room, slamming the door behind him. He yelled down the stairs from the railing, “For fu-ucks sake someone please dress her!” Everyone snapped their heads at Vox who was a glitching mess, “She is half-naked on the floor stuck in her shorts. I ca-cannot do this.”
Vaggie and Charlie ran up to get you into your night own as everyone else laughed at his flustered self.
“Holy shit! The big bad overlord got shy over that!” Angel was on the floor, clutching his stomach, absolutely dying. “What’s wrong? Never seen a naked angel before?”
He covered his face with his hands in shame. “I swear I brought her in there and the moment she was on the floor she started stripping. I turned around and when I looked back she was like that!” He groaned.
“Yeah, forgot to warn ya but…” Husk drank his bottle before continuing, “Last time she got fucked up like that she started changing in the lobby.”
“What’s wrong, old pal?’ Alastor teased, “Afraid of a little skin?” He laughed, mocking his rival.
“You know what. Fuck you. I’m going to my room to reboot myself. I cannot wait to get the fuck away from you.”
Alastor grinned at his frustrated and flustered self, his shadow doing the same.
.
You woke up surprisingly with a terrible hangover. You found yourself tucked into bed and in your nightgown. You had no recollection of the night before and the last thing you remembered was taking your 10th shot. After that, everything was gone. You stretched before you started to pack a couple of bags for your stay with Vox.
Charlie came into your room to check in on you, “You’re awake? How are you feeling? And…what are you doing?”
“I made a deal with Vox.” Charlie’s face dropped at the news, worried for you and your safety. “It’s a chance to get Angel Dust free and on the path to redemption. I…I can’t bear to see him come home after a rough night and I can sense his sadness.”
Charlie hugs you, “Be safe, okay? I know you’re strong but please…don’t get hurt.” You smile in return, placing a hand on her rosy cheeks.
“Thank you. I promise. I’ll be safe.”
Vox was waiting at the lobby entrance for you. Alastor was more than glad to get him out and was practically trying to throw him out the door with Angel and Husk watching in delight, munching on some popcorn.
“I’m waiting for Y/N! She’s coming with me!” He protested, dodging his black tendrils.
“She is not going with you.” Alastor hissed, static in his voice, “She would inform me if she would and she has not.”
You heard the commotion from the stairwell and flew down the stairs, using your body to keep distance between the two rivals. “Alastor! I apologize but I am. I have made a deal with Vox.” Vox straightened himself out, a smug smirk on his face. “I…want to get Angel Dust’s deal broken off. He and I have discussed and agreed that I shall stay and work with him for 3 days.”
Alastor squinted at you, reverting back to his regular form. “A deal with him? My…That is the most foolish of decisions you have ever made.” He scoffed, ears pinned to the back of his head. You step closer to him, holding his hand in comfort.
“Alastor, I apologize for not informing you sooner. I shall remain safe. My duty and loyalties remain with the hotel. I have told you before and I shall tell you again, I must work on breaking the deals that harm the staff the most. You, of all people, should understand that.” His eye twitched a bit at the reminder of his own chains but he did understand. He sighs and nods.
“If anything brings harm to you, inform me immediately.” That was Alastor’s way of telling you to stay safe. You smile and give him a hug, whispering a ‘thank you’ to him. He hugs you back before letting you go off with Vox into a portal you had created.
Upon arriving in his lobby, he was immediately greeted by Velvette and Valentino arguing about how Valentino had, yet again, destroyed one of Velvette’s models. Vox groans and looks at you, his face saying ‘See what I have to deal with?’ before approaching them.
“What the fuck’s happened now?” He says, “And please do not rip each other apart in the lobby.”
“This little piss baby ripped apart not one but two models. I have a show tomorrow and I would have been able to work with but he went ahead and ripped apart two unlucky bitches!” Velvette growled.
“That little bitch Angel Dust texted me to fuck off last night! Me!” Valentino screamed, “I will murder that little whore.”
“Enough.” His voice distorted, left eye spiraling before clearing his throat, “That is no way to act in front of our new temporary guest, Y/N.” He held his hands out and pointed at you. “She’s going to be here for three days and I do believe she’d be a good candidate as a model for you, Velvette. Is she not?”
Velvette squinted at you, eyeing you up and down, “Oh I don’t think I’d be a good-”
“Shush. Shut the fuck up for a bit.” Velvette raised a finger at you before swiping with her other hand, quickly switching your outfit. You were now suddenly in a red dress that showed your curves. She hummed and walked around you. “I suppose she could work. Do you know how to work a catwalk, angel?”
“I-” You cleared your throat, “I certainly know how to walk.”
“Not the fucking question. Pop your little wings out and walk in a straight line.” She ordered. You complied, revealing a set of wings before walking forward, “Alright…now turn. On your heel. Quickly.” You pivoted on your heel and walked back towards Velvette.
“You know what…This could work.” Velvette lit up a bit, “Pleasure to finally meet you. I’m the famous Velvette. One of the better Vees.” She shook your hand quickly before going on her phone.
Valentino slid over to your side, leaning down to your height, “Ah…the famous angel that fell from Heaven to fight for Hell.” He gave you a big smile. You had a vendetta against him because of what you know. He takes you hand and spins you before pulling you close, “I’m Valentino. If you ever decide to drop that tacky hotel and make real money. Let me know~ I can make you a star.”
Vox pulled you away from him, noticing your discomfort. You laugh nervously and fiddled with the dress you were now suddenly stuck in. “Thank you kindly for the offer but I am alright. I have no intentions of partaking in…your art.”
Valentino’s smile didn’t falter, “You know how to find me~” He states before walking away. You see him angrily typing away at his phone to probably harass Angel. You let out a sigh, putting away your wings before looking at Vox.
“I know. A handful, right?” He rolled his eyes, “You’ll get used to it.”
He leads you to your room, “This is where you’ll be staying. Don’t worry, I won’t spy on you.” He winked, “Unless you want me to.” You rolled your eyes in response. “Let me know as soon as you’re settled in. I want to go over what we’ll be doing for the next 3 days.”
“Alright. Thank you for your hospitality.” You nod. You were about to turn around to unpack when you felt his hand grab yours. He gave you a gentle kiss on the back of your hand before teleporting off into the nearest camera.
.
Vox sat in his office with the Vees while you were in your room.
“So what’s the plan here, Vox? Why is the angel in our building?” Velvette asked, a bit on the edge of the fact that someone as strong as you was in close proximity, something she didn’t allow you to see earlier.
“She wants me to break Angel Dust’s contract with Valentino.” He responds. Valentino slammed his fist on the table in anger. “She made a deal that in return for me trying, she’ll be here for 3 days working with us.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?” Valentino growled. “You can’t make me break that deal. That little whore makes me the most money!”
Vox simply grins menacingly, “I can make this all worth it, Valentino.” A plan brewed in his head. He just had to get you to put your guard down around him.
“And what if this shit doesn’t work and I lose that motherfucker because of your deal?”
“It’ll work. And I’ll find somebody better for you. You have so many whores, Val. Angel Dust is just one whore. He’s already going against you, don’t you want somebody that’s a little weaker? Somebody easier to control? By the end of this, we can have all of Hell to recruit.”
“Who would be better than Angel Dust?”
Velvette rolled her eyes, “Why don’t you try and get that popstar in? Verosika Mayday’s her name.”
Valentino calmed down a bit, “Hmm…If I can get Verosika on board, then I might just consider it.”
“Then we have a deal. I get you Verosika and in return, you break Angel Dust from his contract completely.”
Valentino grins, “Deal.”
“Are you really into this angelic bitch?” Velvette asks, aimlessly scrolling through her phone.
Vox laughs, “Absolutely not! I need her power and after those 3 days, I think I have just the plan to get her on my side.”
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obey-me-rot · 2 months
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please please please come back you are possibly one of the best obm writers and trust me i have gone through ALL ao3, tumblr and wattpad. i know what i am talking about trust me 😭😭😭🙏🙏
Strangely enough I am working on something anon! So I am coming back I just need...ideas... In the meanwhile though please do check out @books-and-catears! I've been getting back into OM and they are half responsible for bringing me back !
God maybe I should open up requests...is anybody even in this fandom anymore? But because you are so sweet I'm gonna leave this! Have you ever had a little cut? Well not to fear, your prideful demon Lucifer has got his special disinfectant right here~
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You sigh and put your hand over your neck once again, Lucifer coming up behind you as you sigh and lean forward so you can look at your face in the mirror.
“…I don’t know why I’m being a klutz all of a sudden.”
Lucifer wouldn’t call you a klutz, you were just distracted. You had looked rather lovely tucked in with your head stuck in a book that you had most likely not measured the amount of strength you were putting into your hand. So no, not a klutz–but certainly one step away from getting into yet another tiny accident. He smiles when he sees your pout and reaches for the hand around the back of your neck.
“Surely you shouldn’t be feeling down over a little scratch. Here, let me see–”
Your hand remains firm on your neck, even if his fingers were tucking inside so that he could start pulling it away.
“No no it’s fine--you have a lot of work. I’ll go grab a bandaid or something.”
He can feel you jump when his hand goes to your waist, keeping you in place as his other hand starts tugging down the small barrier you had made for yourself.
“MC. Let me see.”
You knew better than to argue with that voice, Lucifer had made it a priority to condition you and the rest of his brothers to always listen to this tone. It meant that if he had to repeat himself again, it would come with a very harsh punishment. With a sigh, you let him pull your hand away from your neck as your eyes look down at your feet, letting Lucifer see whatever damage you had unconsciously made
And it was–-mild.
The cut was most likely from the RAD badge that they needed to wear on the school uniform, Lucifer had seen you toss your jacket on rather haphazardly whenever you needed to run out of the House of Lamentation when you were late…it was most likely caused by that. Yet what had his attention wasn’t the cut–it was the little indentation of blood that had begun to pool up on the back of your neck.
“…Is...Is it bad?”
When was the last time he had seen human blood? He could probably count the time in millenia. It wasn’t necessarily new to him either–human blood was just human blood, after all. It was used in demon summoning rituals a long time ago. Whoever had wished to make a deal would offer up a hefty amount of their blood just to conjure their presence. No, what made this little sliver of blood so delici–special–was that it was yours. Human blood tastes metallic to your fellow kin, but demon’s had a different sort of palate.
“Not bad no…”
He pulls your hand by the wrist so your fingers go to his lips, letting his tongue trace the single drop of blood that was threatening to roll down your finger, greedily tasting the flavor of his Master's blood. There's no hesitation in his steps when he opens his mouth, pressing your finger against his tongue and closing his lips around it before you could even react. Another greedy suck, a cheeky smile and a hand that refused to let go of your wrist.
“But it should be disinfected right away.”
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bogunicorn · 11 days
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I think it says a lot about the shitty way queer people are treated that my reaction to the extremely obvious Cressida/Eloise chemistry this season is paranoia and suspicion rather than just seeing something with my eyes and trusting that that is, in fact, what I am seeing.
Cressida is obviously being set up to marry Debling to avoid being forced into a marriage set by her father, and characters won't stop reminding the audience that Debling is going to immediately disappear for years after the season and leave his wife to run his estate and live whatever life she wants while he's away. Violet has consciously given up trying to encourage Eloise to find a husband, and instead their conversations are about how Eloise needs a friend other than Cressida. They use the same language that the hetero couples use (Cressida calling Eloise not wanting her friendship earlier as "rejecting my suit," Eloise calling on Cressida the way a male suitor would, seeking each other out anytime they're at a shared function), and Cressida's father warning her to stay away from Eloise is straight out of the coming-of-age queer romances I read as a teenager. It's shot like a romance. If they went full Tipping the Velvet in ep 5, I wouldn't be at all surprised. The showrunner is also a gay man whom I would hope isn't stupid enough to be writing them like this "by accident."
It's also really clear this season that the writers have been listening to the show's reception and answering critiques in-universe. It can be a little obvious, but I don't think any of it is mockery or pandering. Violet is genuinely more helpful instead of pushing her kids into situations, Danbury and Charlotte talked about how the "season diamond" thing is Whistledown's terminology rather than the actual title of the role, Kanthony gets ep 1 spotlight and an actual explanation for why they're not around unlike Daphne and Simon, Eloise has been allowed to grow instead of being pigeonholed as the humorless obnoxious SJW. It would make sense to me that they would have also paid attention to the conversation about Benedict possibly being bisexual and realized that viewers would be accepting of and even enjoy Eloise being bisexual in the main text.
I'm getting into pure speculation here, but I also don't think thos production team expects to get the full 8 seasons. Netflix just doesn't produce dramas that go that long. My speculation is that they more or less have the greenlight for season 4 and MAYBE season 5. 4 is obviously going to be Benedict and Sophie, and my suspicion is that they have 5 earmarked for Francesca, since IIRC in her book she's a widow and s3 has her meeting her husband. They've done basically nothing with Sir Phillip and seemed to have put a bow on Marina's storyline in a way that I think would make it jarring to have them circle back to her and be like "she's dead now and this nothingburger husband is going to hook up with Eloise." They had chances, limited as they were, to have Philip make a memorable impression or have some foreshadowing between him and Eloise for the future and didn't even bother with lip service. I don't think THEY think they'll even get to Eloise's season.
Again, that's entirely speculation based on my gut feeling. But my point is that the show has put itself into a position where I think only the most diehard book fans would complain if Eloise's big love interest is a woman, and the show obviously gave up on catering to book accuracy ages ago.
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romana-after-dark · 4 months
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Dead Dove December 2023 Masterlist
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Hello everyone!
So sorry it took forever to get this out, but it took me 5ever to read through these fics bc I was expresso depresso and working a lot LMFAOOOOOOO
Anyway, THANK YOU SO SO SO MUCH FOR EVERYONE ENTRIES!!! I adore you so so so so much. I am SO HAPPY with how this worked out and the amount of response! I hope to hold another event this March with @for-a-longlongtime at @triplefrontier-anniversary for the TF anniversary over at my main account @romanarose, and an event in June for pride, so if those interest you, follow my main page or this one, or @romana-updates
NOTE: I was unorganized so if I forgot someone's fic, IT WAS NOT ON PURPOSE. I know right now there discourse right now the Pedro fandom specifically, about different people not liking others or small writers or big writers ETC, but I want you to know no one was left out on purpose!
Note 2: If I put your fic here but forgot to reblog LET ME KNOW! I want to make sure everyone gets a chance to shine.
Without further ado, the fics and art!
ALL OF THESE ARE DARK SO SOME DEGREE FROM CNC, DUB CON, TO VIOLENT NON CON! HEAD WARNINGS!
The Last of Us
The Burglary by @aurorawritestoescape and @milla-frenchy: Two men break into your house and take more than just your valuables.
Fight Club by @anama-cara : Post outbreak set in the Boston QZ. You decide to go against Joel in an underground QZ fight club for some extra coin. Joel doesn't take kindly to the competition and decides to punish you in his own special way.
Deja Vu by @milla-frenchy : After a bad experience with a former boyfriend, you meet Joel who makes you trust him fully in the bedroom
Silent Night by @kewwrites : Despite the way he always acted around you, you find it hard to say no to Sarah when she invites you home to her dad's house for the holidays. Surely nothing would happen while she's with you.
Training Day by @koshkamartell : Set in AU, no outbreak. You get more than you bargained for after trying to make Joel jealous.
Code Broken by @auteurdelabre : You only wanted to pull a silly prank on your neighbor, Joel. Who could have seen it ending up like this?
The Art of Breaking by @corazondebeskar-reads : Your meeting is happenstance, but everything that follows? Well, that’s all Joel. He just knows you’re going to be his perfect little toy. He just has to show you how.
Cry Harder by @romana-after-dark : While keeping you captive, Joel's sex drive is insatiable, and the sex seemed to be never ending. You tried to warm him you needed to use the bathroom... he didn't listen.
Nightmare Before Christmas by @katiexpunk : As an escort, you’ve found yourself in some pretty fucked up situations before. Years of experience have taught you to navigate such situations with a combination of tact and assertiveness. Most of the time the men who exude an air of sleaze shrivel back into the corner, embarrassed and limp dicked.  Most of the time.  Tonight is not one of those times.
Locket by @toxicanonymity : Dark!Reader dugs her friends hot dad Joel
Run, Rabbit by @justagalwhowrites : It was just over a year after the world ended that you were captured by Joel and Tommy Miller. They're harsh, they're cold and they're killers. But, as a nurse, you're a valuable person to have around and they're not the worst thing wandering the wasteland that was the United States. And there might be more to these men than meets the eye.
Godless by @javier-penas-wifexx420 : You work at a brothel that operates above a saloon in your town. Joel is the leader of a group of outlaws that come periodically to collect payment and wreak havoc. One visit, you catch Joel’s eye and he decides he has to have you.
Across the Spiderverse
After Dark by @runa-falls : He wants you. and he knows you need him.
Triple Frontier
Deep Seeded Issues by @djarinmuse: Summary: At an N.A (narcotics anonymous) meeting you recall a dark and embarrassing memory, not knowing the connection in the room.
My Blood Would Teach Me How to Love by @winniethewife : Santi finds you self harming, blood kink ensues.
Room's on Fire by @romana-after-dark : Cult AU, Pope, Frankie, Will and Ben are cult leaders and need a virgin to breed who will birth the savior: the Madonna. Initially honored to find redemption, the Madonna has to learn how to navigate all four men and a circle of other people at the house.
Goodnight, Princess by @melodygatesauthor : Your dad's best friend accidentally discovers that you're a sex worker. He tries to let it go, but it eats away at him until things go way too far.
The Card Counter
Bad Bet by @boredzillenial and art by @lunar-ghoulie4art : William beats you in a poker tournament, but you just can’t accept defeat, not yet…
Getting Whats Mine by @winniethewife
Lightening Face
Puppy by @darkuselesssomebody : In which the reader is a manipulative bitch - and basil snaps because of it
Mojave
Cruel Intentions by @hon3yboy : You're on a soul seeking journey, just another young, pretty, thing. All alone and stranded in the desert, ripe for the picking and ol' Jack has his eyes set on you.
Moon Kight
Death to Dignity by @juneknight : An intruder (Marc) breaks in to your apartment.
*************
I cannot thank you enough for your support and interaction for htis series!!!!! I had SUCH a good time reading all these, you are all so talented!!!
I hope to do more events soon as it's really helped me make some friends and get to know people here!!!!
Please remember to reblog these authors, and if you're tagged here, be sure to check out more! Lots of great content here!
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emersonfreepress · 1 month
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help i'm alive
So! Long time, no see. 2023 was a whole goddamn lot lol
I don't have a demo update to share yet, but that's because I had to scrap nearly everything I managed to write during a very, very, very bad stint of writer's block last year. I hadn't even realized it had been a block like that until I went over my work so far last month and realized it was bad -- like, trust me; a slog to read that didn't even sound like me. It's been extremely frustrating but I've finally broken free of that and it's been easy and actually fun to write again for the first time in actual years. I just hate giving updates that have no actual news in them. And I really had nothing to share other than: I deleted thousands of words and feel so much better now 😅
Anyway, little about my demo plans have changed: I'm still putting out the Chapter 3 demos in Choicescript/on Dashingdon and then will be going dark to move things over to Twine. Where I am in the process right now is... feeling like 35% done with the overhauled version of this chapter and 50% done for the next demo update.
As far as asks, I'm... not really sure what to do?? I believe I've read them all (I love you guys), but so much time has passed since getting most of them that I'm not sure if it's, like... still pertinent??? To go back and answer them?? I suppose some of them like character asks could be, but all the nice messages of support -- that feels weird since I've practically ghosted this blog since August! Idk. Y'all tell me what to do with 'em and I'll do it. Maybe I should make a poll.
Uh... that's really all there is to say regarding the game! I've added some personal stuff after the cut, but if you're done here: Thanks for reading and sticking around. It means the world, for real.
So what has occupied my time all this time? Doctor, therapy, money, and friends. And improv! But especially the first two. There was a lot of non-writing related stuff fucking up my ability to focus and write, so hopefully with my mind and body both feeling a lot better, I can get back to being present and active with the game. I didn't realize how physically unwell I was until last year and it's been like... life-long issues I've been treating. It turns out it's not normal to feel exhausted enough to sleep at any given time, at all times, for your whole life! wow!!
I also uninstalled Tumblr from my phone back in February, so you could say I'm sort of generally focused on offline life. (And what an interesting coincidence that my writer's block dissipated shortly after that...) I also just moved!! The last two weekends have been so expensive and stressful -_- But I can't even compare the old place to the new. We're basically paying the same price for idek how much more space. The cats are so happy; which means the house humans get to be happy.
My schedule is finally freed up from constant medical shit (there was a 3-month stretch this winter with multiple doctor appointments literally every fucking week 🙃🙃🙃). My mental health is doing a lot better -- literally incomparably better compared to where I was this time last year. There's live comedy now (which I dabble in, to be clear lol), but I've finally found myself able to like... balance it all. The physical and creative energy that goes into it all, anyway. The lovely thing about improv is that you kinda just show up and do your thing -- it doesn't cut into my writing time so much as it costs energy. Unless I end up in this comedy debate show thing next month, which I am very excited to give up writing time for
So like... Life is life-ing and I'm just vibing. Or something? I'll be around.
Thank you all again so much for your interest, support, patience, and readership <3
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sophie-frm-mars · 1 month
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Hi, ex-supporter here. Genuinely hope you’re doing well. I have been tempted to start up my support again because you genuinely are a talented writer/creator and I do enjoy your work.
I hope you understand supporting your Patreon is somewhat fraught. Your private life should be none of our business, but sadly it is relevant here. Moral action, both private and political is central to your work; you have called out plenty of people for abuse & morality drives your politics. We know abuse took place on your end, but that’s all.
A lot of people like myself might be emotionally rooting for you to bounce back from this, but are unable to support you right now because that moral dissonance has not been resolved. We really don’t know if you are like other ‘cancelled’ leftist influencers and just use leftist values to deflect attention away from abuse, or you are actually trying to do better and working on yourself.
You don’t owe us anything. However, many of us who are eager to support you are forced to hold back because trust has been damaged, and there has not been any real sign of reparation or reconciliation. Maybe you think those kind of questions are invasive, maybe you don’t think we are real fans for not sticking by you despite the allegations.
I don’t know, I just want you to know that there are plenty of people who do want to support you, but feel they need to trust you first. And that can’t happen without addressing some things.
Anyways, best wishes. Take care.
Hiya, thank you for speaking to me on this.
Before I say the rest of what I say I want to be clear that between me and the people I was involved with in 2023, there were some instances where I was responsible for harm, there were instances where I received harm and there was also a general pervasive ecosystem of harmful behaviours in the community I was in. This includes people who signed the statement against me, and in one instance one of them did something which everyone to whom I have described it has agreed is sexual assault, though there is more besides.
For the time being I'm not talking publicly more about what happened because it was a very messy situation, and although I have been seriously harmed by issues in my personal life being litigated in public in this way, I don't want to give my full account of my relationships with everyone involved because I don't want that type of harm to be done to other trans women. There are plenty of complicating factors as there often are in real life that social media isn't really capable of parsing. I have made it clear repeatedly that I am open to hearing anything that people involved want to say to me, and I talked in this post in January about that and about what I would be doing to ensure that I put in the work and make sure I don't cause harm like it again
https://x.com/sophie_frm_mars/status/1745414530455261531
I think that that post says everything I would like to say for now, although I regret saying I agree that my behaviour was abusive, because with more distance and perspective I don't think abusive behaviour was actually described to me.
As I understand it via the support that my therapist and friends have offered, my problems in 2023 were that: I wasn't taking my mental health seriously, I didn't learn good kink practice, I had very little appreciation of my own boundaries and when I shouldn't be doing something that someone asks me to do, and I was high basically all the time. I am in therapy and doing DBT and taking my mental health deadly seriously, I have done a huge amount of reading assigned by my therapist about kink, sex, relationships and mental health, I am working in an ongoing way on learning how to effectively communicate, know my boundaries and understand myself well enough to not be in the kinds of situations that risk harm, and I'm no longer high all the time.
(If anyone is interested in those book recs, so far I've read: Tomorrow Sex Will Be Good Again by Katherine Angel; The Right To Sex by Amia Srinivasan; Screw Consent (I hate this edgy title) by Joseph Fischel; Playing Well With Others; The Loving Dominant by John and Libby Warren; I Hope We Choose Love by Kai Cheng Thom; The New Topping Book by Dossie Easton and Janet W Hardy; and Dissociation Made Simple by Jamie Marich. There have been some others, and I've written a bit about them in the book club channel on my discord as I've been reading)
I haven't heard from the people involved. The last I heard from anyone was one of my exes calling me a pathological liar and saying that they just want to move on with their lives, so while I'm doing the work to make sure I act better in future I am just trying to get on with my life and let them get on with theirs. I hope this clarifies why I have not talked further about the situation.
I will say that the last few months have been hellish for me. I have been frequently suicidal, I spent Christmas and new years alone, I lost a tooth because I couldn't afford proper dental treatment, people from within the community I've been ostracised from have been putting pressure on my remaining friends to cut ties with me, Keffals had my abuser on her twitch stream, a bizarre exaggerated and monsterised version of my personal life has been publicly gossiped about by trans people, fash and "leftist" drama streamers alike, I have been doing other work to make sure I can still pay rent and afford my bills and my HRT, and to survive. As I've been getting more stable and more able to focus on things besides this, I've been working on new writing because all I want with regard to my work and my channel is for my writing to help people. I don't want to talk about my private life, but I do understand that some number of people will feel after what has been said about me that they can't move forward with me without hearing the full details. Lots of people in my life have repeatedly encouraged me to publish a full account of everything that happened but I know how the Internet works and I don't want other trans women to be harmed in the ways that I have been harmed.
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bluespiritshonour · 6 months
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Oh my God!
I just caught up with World's Finest: Teen Titans and I absolutely have to write this out:
First of all, I love this cover:
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The thing that caught my eye: “you're grounded.”
Not the dramatic “you're fired” as if the motherfucker didn't raise that damn kid in his own damn house for YEARS.
(I know. I know. Bar on the ground, but what would you?)
Also, the anger palpable on Bruce's face and Dick's absolute disregard for it. I'm laughing here y'all. This is what teenagers act like. This is what fights between parents and children look like.
Also. Dick Grayson, I've been missing. You're back from war!
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I love how curt he is. The “Get lost” hits in all the right places. We love a strongly-principled character that stands for what he believes in. With all the lukewarm Dick Grayson writing floating around I felt like walking into a coffee shop while it's snowing outside.
More of this writing, please.
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I'd been waiting for this moment all through this series.
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This conversation.
I compare things all the time. It might not be the right thing in every field but I think it serves well when it comes to comic books. We all have personal “canon criteria”—for example, mine are “Darwyn Cooke wrote this Bruce so I'm taking it as valid characterisation ” or “Every version of Bruce played by Kevin Conroy is valid”. (Minus Bruce Timm bullshit!)
Which was what cinched my hatred for Bruce after reading a Robin short story that Cooke wrote and alluded to Robin: Year One in it. I mean, I might not fuck with Dixon, but am I going to call even Cooke's Bruce OOC? No. It means Bruce is a jerk. Full stop.
Waid is one of the writers I respect (excluding Kingdom Come. I hate it and I can't put my finger on the why. But I just do: I hate it. I hate it for Clark. I hate it for Diana. And I'm a professional Bruce-hater so let's not even go there. I hate it for Dick too.)
And Dick and Bruce's relationship has a lot of baggage from the fact that a) Bruce is himself traumatised and fails to meet Dick's emotional needs b) he wasn't ready to be a father when he adopted Dick c) Dick simply suffers from being the eldest—the test child.
And very rarely have I seen writers manage to walk on the thin line of complicated-but-dedicated-and-strong.
Young Justice cartoon did it. Dick and Bruce's relationship is going strong. But they fight and have different values. And Dick can see all that is wrong with Bruce's approach to vigilantism in particular and life in general.
Grimm (Legends of the Dark Knight #149-154) did it right. Where Bruce hurt Dick deeply and made him feel unwanted all the while overthinking about Dick's well-being. Way to go, buddy! You can see the repercussions it has for Dick while simultaneously stare at this man who's tying himself into knots trying to think how best to parent.
I think that's what most Bruce and Dick comics miss: the excessive worrying. They don't show the worry, make them fight for drama, never address it apart from throwing out a “it's because Bruce's worried” (bitch, where?) and have Dick running back to Gotham at the first chance. It sounds an awful lot like “your parents hurt you 'cause they love you” bullshit.
I think World's Finest manages it well because foremost, Bruce says, in words, that he's worried about Dick's well-being. He's taciturn, he's putting constant pressure on Dick all in the hopes of making him quit Titans. All this makes him a jerk. But I don't hate him for it.
It's between Dick's “you don't trust me” and Bruce's “no, I don't trust them.”
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Most teenagers clash with their parents. It's normal. That's what Waid has shown here and I love it. It feels very—normal?
Especially when the Bats aren't normal! Bruce sure as fuck ain't a normal parent. But there was something very bitter-sweet coming-of-age in this conversation.
Bruce does all those things that are bad for Dick and his growing independence. You're not supposed to handle teenagers like that.
He's worried and taking desperate measures. “If I punish him, then maybe he'll obey me and quit Titans and then he'll he safe”—lots of parents who don't know how to deal with teenagers do it.
But the sequence of it: Bruce is worried → Bruce wants Dick to quit Titans → for Dick it means proving himself to be better, to not get hurt (as if he can control that beyond a certain point) → Bruce being alarmed at Dick's insistence to stay with the Titans and taking desperate measures like benching him.
At least it makes sense.
Compare it to Dixon's Nightwing origin story, which honestly, personally I think was lazy writing. Drama for drama's sake. “You’re fired because you're spending too much time with the Titans.” The same writer also had Bruce say that he did it because he wanted Dick to strike out on his own. Blah, blah, blah.
And no matter whatever happens he'd never ever say it to Dick's face that he's worried about him because—well, reasons.
Robin: Year One logic:
I'm worried about Dick's health so I fire him. He runs off and can get hurt? He joins a school for assasins? None of my business. He can get hurt on his own, I don't care as long as it is not on my conscience. Peace.
—Bruce “professional narcissist” Wayne.
So, yes. When faced with this book(WF: TT), I'd call Dixon's writing lazy.
I'm also comparing this to several other instances when Bruce verbally says (never to Dick, mind you) that he loves that Dick's a better person and better vigilante than him. But in the same book he'd yell at Dick for exactly the same thing. (I consider that lazy writing, since BTAS made sure to show a shot of Bruce smiling whenever Dick was happy/not like him).
I like this thing here where he says it to Dick's face. He's still grounding him for “discipline's sake” or whatever—very, very IC for Bruce.
But he also lets Dick know that he appreciates his values, that are different—better—than Bruce's own.
I can stomach that.
Honestly Bruce's writing in this book felt like BtAS writing (pre-Bruce Timm fuckery). That's a compliment.
P.S. Waid's a good story-teller overall. His Superman: Birthright was one of the first Superman comics I read and I fell in love with Clark right away.
Peace ✌️😂
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worstjourney · 6 months
Text
The Millennials' Polar Expedition
A year ago today (23 Nov 2022), I launched Worst Journey Vol.1 at the Scott Polar Research Institute. This is the text of the speech I gave to the lovely people who turned up to celebrate.
As many of you know, my interest in the Terra Nova Expedition was sparked by Radio 4’s dramatisation of The Worst Journey in the World, now 14 years ago.  The story is an incredible story, and it got its claws into me, but what kept me coming back again and again were the people.  I couldn’t believe anyone so wonderful had ever really existed.  So when I finally succumbed to obsession and started reading all the books, it was the expedition members’ own words which I most cherished.  These were not always easy to come by, though, so plenty of popular histories were consumed as well.  Reading both in tandem, it soon became clear that, while there were some good books out there, there was a lot of sloppy research in the polar echo chamber as well.
I also discovered that no adaptation had attempted to get across the full scope of the expedition.  There has never been a full and fair dramatic retelling, all having been limited by time, budget, or ideology from telling the whole story truthfully.  I was determined that my adaptation would be both complete and accurate, and be as accountable as possible to those precious primary documents and the people who wrote them.
So the years of research began.  I moved to Cambridge to be able to drop in at SPRI and make the most of the archives.  Getting to Antarctica seemed impossible, but I went to New Zealand to get at least that much right, and on the way back stayed with relatives in Alberta, the most Antarctic place I could realistically visit.  I gathered reference for objects wherever I could.  Because Vol.1 takes place mainly on the Terra Nova, which is now a patch of sludge on the seabed off Greenland, I cobbled together a Franken-Nova in my mind, between the Discovery up in Dundee and the Star of India in San Diego.  I spent a week on a Jubilee Sailing Trust ship in order to depict tall-ship sailing correctly.  I’m sure I’ve still got loads of things wrong, but I did all I could, to get as much as I could, right.
But still, everyone I met who had been to Antarctica said, “you can’t understand Antarctica until you’ve been there, and you can’t tell the story without understanding Antarctica; you have to go.”  So I applied to the USAP’s Antarctic Artists and Writers Program, with faint hope, as they do “Ahrt” and I draw cartoons.  But I must have blagged a good grant proposal, because a year after applying, I was stepping out of a C-17 onto the Ross Ice Shelf.  The whole trip would have been worth it just to stand there, turn in a circle, and see how all the familiar photographs fit together.  But the USAP’s generosity didn’t stop there, and in the next month I saw Hut Point, Arrival Heights, the Beardmore Glacier (including the moraine on which the Polar Party stopped to “geologise”), and Cape Crozier, and made three visits to the Cape Evans hut.  Three!  On top of the visual reference I got priceless qualitative data.  The hardness of the sound.  The surprising warmth of the sun. The sugary texture of the snow.  The keen edge on a slight breeze.  The way your fingertips and toes can start to go when the rest of you is perfectly warm.  The SHEER INSANITY of Cape Crozier.  The veterans were right – I couldn’t have drawn it without having been there, but now I have, and can, and I am more grateful than I can ever adequately express.  With all these resources laid so copiously at my feet, all I had to do was sit down and draw the darn thing.  Luckily I have some very sound training to back me up on that.
Now, this is all very well for the how of making the book, and, I hope, interesting enough. But why?  Why am I putting so much effort into telling this story, and why now?
Well, it means a lot to me personally.  To begin to understand why, you need to know that I grew up in the 80s and 90s, at the height of individualist, goal-oriented, success-driven, dog-eat-dog, devil-take-the-hindmost neoliberalism.  It was just assumed that humans, when you get right down to it, were basically self-interested jerks, and I saw plenty of them around so I had no reason to question this assumption.  The idea was that if you did everything right, and worked really hard, you could retire at 45 to a yacht in the Bahamas, and if you didn’t retire to a yacht, well, you just hadn’t tried hard enough.  Character, in the sense of rigorous personal virtue, was for schmucks.  What mattered was success.  Even as my politics evolved, I still took it as a given that this was how the world worked, and that was how people generally were – after all, there was no lack of corroborating evidence.  So: I worked really hard.  I single-mindedly pursued my self-interest.  I made sacrifices, and put in the time, and fought my way into my dream job and all the success I could have asked for.
And then I met the Terra Nova guys.
What struck me most about them was that even when everything was going wrong, when their expectations were shattered and they had to face the cruellest reality, they were still kind.  Not backbiting, recriminating, blame-throwing, defensive, or mean, as one would expect – they were lovely to each other, patient, supportive, self-sacrificing; in fact the worse things got, the better they were.  They still treated each other as friends even when it wasn’t in their self-interest, was even contrary to their self-interest.  I didn’t know people could be like that.  But there they were, in plain writing, being thoroughly, bafflingly, decent.  Not just the Polar Party – everyone had to face their own brutal realities at some point, and they all did so with a grace I never thought possible.
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It presented a very important question:
When everything goes belly-up, and you’re facing the worst, what sort of person will you be?
Or perhaps more acutely: What sort of person would you rather be with?
It was so contrary to the world I lived in, to the reality I knew – it was a peek into an alternate dimension, populated entirely with lovely, lovely people, who really, genuinely believed that “it’s not whether you win or lose, but how you play the game,” and behaved accordingly.  It couldn’t be real.  There had to be a deeper, unpleasant truth: that was how the world worked, after all.  I kept digging, expecting to hit bottom at some point, but I only found more gold, all the way down.  How could I not spend my life on this?
Mythology exists to pass on a culture’s values, moral code, and survival information – how to face challenges and prevail.  Scott’s story entered the British mythology, and had staying power, because it exemplified those things so profoundly for the culture that created and received it.  But the culture changed, and there were new values; Scott’s legacy was first inverted and then cast aside.  The new culture needed a new epic hero.  You’d think it would be Amundsen, the epitome of ruthless success, but “Make Plan – Execute Plan – Go Home” has no mythic value, so he didn’t stick.  The hero needed challenges, he needed setbacks, and he needed to win, on our terms.
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Shackleton!  Shackleton was a winner!  Shackleton told us what we knew to be true and wanted to hear at epic volume: that if you want something badly enough, and try really hard, you will succeed!  (Especially if you can control the narrative.)  Scott, on the other hand, tells us that if you want something badly enough, and try really hard . . . you may nevertheless die horribly in the snow.  Nobody wants to hear that!  What a downer!  I think it’s no coincidence that Shackleton exploded into popular culture in the late 90s and has dominated it ever since: he is the mythic hero of the zeitgeist. I am always being asked if I’ll be doing Shackleton next.  He has six graphic novels already!  That is plenty!  But people still want to tell and be told his story, because it’s a heroic myth that validates our worldview.
That’s why I am so determined to tell the Scott story, because Scott is who we don’t realise we need right now – and Wilson, and Bowers, and Cherry, and Atch, and all the rest.  The Terra Nova Expedition is the Millennials’ polar expedition.  We’ve worked really hard, we’ve done everything we were supposed to, we made what appeared to be the right decisions at the time, and we’re still losing.  Nothing in the mythology we’ve been fed has prepared us for this.  No amount of positive attitude is going to change it.  We have all the aphorisms in the world, but what we need is an example of how to behave when the chips are down, when the Boss is not sailing into the tempest to rescue us, when the Yelcho is not on the horizon.  When circumstances are beyond your power to change, how do you make the best of your bad situation?  What does that look like? Even if you can’t fix anything, how do you make it better for the people around you – or at the very least, not worse?  Scott tells us: you can be patient, supportive, and humble; see who needs help and offer it; be realistic but don’t give in to despair; and if you’re up against a wall with no hope of rescue, go out in a blaze of kindness.  We learn by imitation: it’s easy to say these things, but to see them in action, in much harder circumstances than we will ever face, is a far greater help.  And to see them exemplified by real, flawed, complicated people like us is better still; they are not fairy-tale ideals, they are achievable. Real people achieved them.
My upbringing in the 80s milieu of selfishness, which set me up to receive the Scott story so gratefully, is hardly unique.  There are millions of us who are hungry for a counter-narrative.  My generation is desperate for demonstrations of caring, whether it’s activism or social justice or government policies that don’t abandon the vulnerable.  We’ve seen selfishness poison the world, and we want an alternative.  The time for competition is past; we must cooperate or perish, but we don’t know how to do it because our mythology is founded on competition.  The Scott story, if told properly, explodes the Just World Fallacy, and liberates us from the lie that has ruled our lives: that you make your own luck.  What happens, happens: what matters is how you respond to it.  My obsession with accuracy is in part to honour the men, and in part because Cherry was the ultimate stickler and he’d give me a hard time if I didn’t, but also because, if I’m telling the story to a new generation, I’m damn well going to make sure we get that much RIGHT.  It’s been really interesting to see, online, how my generation and the next have glommed onto polar exploration narratives, not as thrilling feats of derring-do, but as emotional explorations of found family and cooperative resilience.  We love them because they love each other, and loving each other helps get them through, and we want – we need – to see how that’s done.  It’s time to give them the Terra Nova story, and to tell it fully, fairly, and honestly, in all its complexity, because that is how their example is most useful to us.  Not as gods, and not as fools, but as real human beings who were excellent to each other in the face of disaster.  I only hope that I, a latecomer to their ways, can do them justice.
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antianakin · 1 year
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For everyone who loves to claim "The Jedi never seem to care that they're leading a slave army" please show me ONE EXAMPLE (that isn't literally a guy who betrayed everyone for money and therefore cannot be trusted) of the Jedi being condemned for not caring. Outside of that one comment made by Slick, which is 100% paralleling Anakin's own comments in Revenge of Sith and therefore completely unreliable, no one ever condemns the Jedi for this. No one ever brings it up, despite MULTIPLE really good other opportunities to do so: Cut Lawquane, the Citadel arc, Pong Krell/Umbara arc, the Zyggeria arc, the Fives Conspiracy arc, the Riyo Chuchi episodes in TBB season 2 recently that most explicitly deal with clone rights. At NO POINT are the clones acknowledged as slaves by someone trustworthy or the Jedi condemned as slave OWNERS by someone reliable. We never even hear Tarkin or Palpatine bring this up, and this would've been SUCH an easy way to manipulate Anakin into mistrusting the Jedi just that little bit more.
Everyone seems to forget that TCW is a show made for kids. Just because most of us are adults who like the show, who may have even discovered the show AS an adult and enjoyed it, does not mean that it's not a show explicitly made for children. When they want you to know something, they DO NOT make it subtle.
So if they wanted you to condemn the Jedi as slave owners, you would know. They would be saying it all the time. They would have Anakin reacting to them as slavers. They would have reputable characters bringing it up as an issue. It's not like they DON'T have people who criticize the Jedi in universe. You think if the writers wanted us to know the Jedi didn't care about leading a slave army that they WOULDN'T have put that into Satine's arsenal of bullshit that she lobs at Obi-Wan for three episodes straight? You think they WOULDN'T have had Ahsoka throw that in Obi-Wan's face in season 7 when she's not trying to be fair?
Please, I am begging you, PLEASE learn to tell the difference between "the writing for the clones in the show is so clumsy that it ends up making the clones look a lot like a slave army which has some unfortunate implications about the Jedi that they clearly did not intend" and "it's canon that the Jedi don't care that they're leading a slave army."
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molsno · 5 months
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I have such complex feelings about danganronpa but the treatment of chihiro fujisaki still remains a major sticking point to me.
I've had several different interpretations of the character over the years as my relationship with my gender has evolved but after all these years I feel like I can finally mourn the way she was treated as a trans girl.
it's just... heinous. kazutaka kodaka is so transmisogynistic in his writing that it's sickening to even think about. how am I supposed to feel about the fact that his work has touched my life in such a major way? I'm still talking about danganronpa over 10 years after I first got into it. but an unskippable, major, and early part of the story of the first game makes it clear how he thinks about people like me.
the text of the game is vile. along with the other students, she's threatened with her deepest secret being revealed if nobody murders one of their classmates. she has to face the fact that she's going to be forcibly outed to her classmates in the worst way possible. after she's killed out of jealousy for her bravery by mondo owada, who at the very least has the decency to move her body from the boys' locker room to the girls' to protect her secret, her body is groped to "confirm" that she's a "boy", she's immediately misgendered by all her classmates, and monokuma tells everyone her backstory in a way that totally disregards her actual feelings.
chihiro is not a boy. she doesn't ever claim to be one, except in school mode, which crucially, is explicitly not canon and wasn't even present in the original release. the only reason why anyone, in-game and in the fandom, believes that she's a boy is because of transmisogyny and because of monokuma's explanation. is he the type of character that you should trust, though? not only is he willing to forcibly out a trans girl, this is a pattern of behavior; the mastermind controlling monokuma later threatens to out juzo sakakura as gay as blackmail in the dr3 anime.
when I view the actions of chihiro fujisaki, I can't see anything but a trans girl. she has a severe inferiority complex, cries easily, lacks confidence in herself, hesitates to spend time with cis girls due to a fear of being ostracized for who she is, and heavily latches onto anyone who treats her respectfully (as seen if you do her free time events). and then she's thrust into a horrible situation where she could be killed at any moment, and then given 24 hours to try and come out on her own terms before monokuma does it for her in a way that explicitly misgenders her. she wants to become someone strong, someone who can stand up for herself and fight back against bullies like monokuma who don't respect her gender, but she doesn't get to do that on her own time. she still tries, though, and for it, she's killed.
it's just... tragic. what else can I say? she's yet another example of transmisogynistic tropes in media, but she feels personal to me in a way that few other such characters do. I've always loved chihiro a lot, even when I was younger and couldn't quite put my finger on why.
I don't think I would terribly mind her death if kodaka was a better writer. if danganronpa actually made use of all of its seemingly largely unintentional anticapitalist potential, if it touched on systemic issues such as transmisogyny with tact and respect (for example, if the other students respected her identity and opposed monokuma for repeatedly misgendering her), her death would still be upsetting, but I could accept that.
she just... deserves so much better.
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wind-up-thancred · 8 months
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bit of thancred character musing under the cut that im gonna try to approximate from a 6am discord rambling into something i can actually post. both SHB and EW spoilers included
i saw some folks talking on twt about how guilt seems to be a very important factor in his life and i agree. i think a lot of major parts of his character and arcs have been due to guilt over something he did (or didnt even really do, re: the whole goobue rampage situation). it's driven him to work his ass off after louisoix which lead to him getting possessed... but its probably also what motivated him to do better for ryne after being forced to look his fuckups directly in the eye instead of just wallowing about them. but i think, at the same time, he doesnt really seem to, like... actually be proud of himself for a lot of the stuff he's done in order to work off that guilt? the biggest giveaway for that being the line in endwalker on the ragnarok where he talks about his "good deeds" cynically and seems to insist that they were never really that impactful in the first place. that they'll just go to dust when he dies.
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in shb, during the ahm areng segment, not only does he talk down on himself in general, but also puts down his attempts to help OG minfilia back in the pre-ARR days... when i'm pretty sure she never even blamed him for the goobue rampage in the first place.
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it's all a little bit sad to me, tbh. i've seen some people reason that, because he was only able to escape poverty due to louisoix seeing potential in his thieving skills, he's essentially internalized the idea that he's only really worth keeping around by ANYONE if he's actively being productive, either helping others or trying to fix whatever fuckups he feels he's made. i think that would explain a lot of this
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note the "few positive traits" line, which to me comes across as "i was only picked up out of childhood poverty because he thought my skills were useful." though i don't really know how much of that mentality he's managed to work past by post endwalker. he IS able to go off on his own, and mentions that he trusts the scions to keep themselves safe now... but as i ranted about before, the short story points out that he's only really content to rest briefly before he feels obligated again to seek out unrest to try and help, specifically mentioning minfilia again. also, a couple times during the story, notably post ARR after his possession, mid SHB after he's wounded in a fight with sineaters, and post SHB after he passes out due to the weakening soul-body bond, he seems to dislike even having to rest for medical reasons
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it's a pretty interesting part of his character to me. idk if the writers specifically had his rigorous upbringing in mind when they wrote these parts of his character, but to me it would make a lot of sense as an explanation for why he's so averse to rest and why he carries so much guilt and why he's so passionate about keeping the folks around him safe. that's kinda been his whole reason for life since he was a kid-- using his skills for the benefit of others. to him, doing anything other than that would be a waste, it seems.
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idk. funny guy makes my heart hurt. yes i had all these dialogue screencaps saved and on hand. yes i am a little insane. what of it
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Sorry for being so dead!! Lol get it??, my health hasn't been too good and I was hit with MASSIVE writers block still have it :( .
Regardless, I am slightly better now!
*:..。o○Tengen Uzui General HC's○o。..:*
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For absolute starters, this man fucking LOVES HIP DIPS. GOES FERAL
He is that one tik tok audio screaming about hip dips
I think he has a preference for more chubby partners, likes a little squish to them and most certainly has no shame in expressing his love for them.
Oh my god this man absolutely has a full skincare routine that he sticks with to a T, making a point to do it every night.
He will drag you into it, has no problem with just picking you up and carrying you to the bathroom while the wives watch with a laugh and follow behind with matching smiles.
Tengen is the type of man to pamper his lovers, likes to dress them up in pretty clothes and shiny jewelry. He especially likes to get in his lovers lap, make-up brush in hand and scolds you if you start squirming.
"Sit still! It's just a brush, you'll smudge the eyeshadow!"
You can't help but squirm, feeling the pointy bristles near your eye just freaks you out! You trust Tengen, a lot, but seriously it feels like it's so close to just stabbing yo-
Tengen grabs your face with an annoyed huff, his hand holding you firmly in place with his eyebrows furrowed and the command slipping from his lips with a slight growl.
"Stay still. "
Tengen also has the tendency to grab in his sleep. The man treats his wives and lovers like a giant teddy bear, clinging and NOT letting go.
You've been late to work more than once.
This man loves to pamper, I said it before and I'll say it again. If he even smells a bad mood he's on you like a rabid dog.
While not Rengoku levels of emotional comfort, he's much more of a fix it type.
If you have a depression spiral? He's dragging you out of bed and making you help with chores, distracting you constantly from your thoughts. He's helping you bathe and brushing out your hair, making you meals (that are burnt from his attempts before Hina takes over) .
The wives of course help, loving you just as much as Tengen and putting just as much effort into caring for you.
Mostly Hina, but Suma and Makio make efforts too! They give great cuddles, and hugs, and love to gossip with you!
Anyways, I'm absolutely down horrendous for the Uzui's.
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powerpuffobsession · 14 days
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Am I the only one who feels that Hazbin Hotel's overall vibe is far too naive and upbeat for an adult cartoon about hell and redemption of sinners?
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I feel like before writing this cartoon, Vivzie and the other writers should have made a trip to unfortunate areas of the world and watch how the lifestyle there rolls. Because hell is said to be a place of misery, where there is no trust and a lot of hate, both internal and external... Adam is an object of pure unfiltered hartred (both from writers and fandom) because he dares to live in heaven, such a safe and friendly-natured place...
And yet the sinners who happen to be main characters act more like school kids on a field trip (even more carefree than those, lol) - their selfish and sinful motives are so artificial and are brought up only when these characters need to look like a victim, not like criminals who somehow deserved a place in hell
Obviously, it's a manipulative trope to put them in a better light than Heaven and Adam (who is forever silenced by the writers and not allowed to voice any thoughts and reflections other than "hurr durr murder I luuuv murdering and being evil because that's what I was since I was born, even though Lilith and Eve, born literally the same way as me, were innocent victims from the get go, and no logical explanation for that will be provided whatsoever - men bad, women good")
In the light of all that, the sinners are too eager to trust each other and form "da epic powar of friendship" mlp-sonic-style
In a society built on terror, anarchy and survival instincts, no one would ever bother wasting vital power on noticing someone's problems and helping them out. Everyone is focused on their own problems and desires, and that's what drives them to act. Well, the exception may be family members, and even that varies
That's why Husk's intent to comfort Angel after the later attacks him over nothing at the bar, looks really fake, considering the setting. At first I thought that "loser baby" where Husk insults Angel, was some sort of revenge and Husk laughing in the spider's face. But no, it actually turned out to be a comforting song that started their friendship. Husk literally had no motivation to want to help Angel, because he was annoyed by him all the time prior. If there was some kind of basis for their bonding, I would have believed it. But not like this.
And Angel had no reason to actually like that sort of comfort. I get it when your best friend or a family member cheers you up in a harsh way - you know them. And even when coming from people you trust that can hurt. Now imagine a complete stranger doing that to you. That's actually something that shouldn't be done - trying to playfully insult or jester a person you haven't communicated with for a long enough time to gain their trust. And to make this even more strange, Angel at first reacts negatively, but then suddenly snaps to liking that disrespectful way of comforting for no reason at all.
And why did Angel even vent his problems to Husk, a stranger bartender who he'd hurt before. Wasn't he actually afraid of being laughed at and of Husk using his trauma to spread gossip around or something?
Next, Sir Pentious. In the pilot (which is officially part of canon, mind you), he already felt like a joke sunday cartoon villain, but at least he had some edge to him that made him look like a sinner with some dark history. In the series however, he gets nerfed the very moment he steps into the hotel to the point where it's painful to look at
His tendency to abuse his henchmen, his physopathic demeanor, his hartred for Cherri (instead of embarrassing attempts to get blue balled by her), his sincere power hunger - where did all that go? Vanished in a blink of an eye. All that's left of a promising snake demon is a pile of fanservice. So morally unchallenging and harmless that a viewer theoretically simply cannot resist loving him
Well i'm kind disappointed. We don't even know in what way Sir Pentious had to improve, because the plot never focused on his past, his life goals, whatever made him want to lead turf wars and whatever awful things he did in life, what was the point where he started degrading... none of that. He just became a better person after one "sorry song" and acted perfectly innocent ever since and didnt put any effort into getting ready to sacrifice himself for other main characters
The sacrifice... to me it's baffling how fast the sinners, over the course of just 6 months, actually became Charlie's family figures and risked their lives for her hotel. Such pure child-cartoon-styled power of friendship, built in hell, with the aid of a princess who cant even think through her project of helping sinners without bringing them more trouble... realistically, Charlie would have had to fight angels alone (how convenient it is that no main characters died in that chaotic brawl, right?)
And Charlie herself is far too naiive and soft-natured for someone who is free to walk along the streets of hell looking at all the muder, rape and othe horrible stuff that's happening there. Given that she's 200, Charlie had more than enough time to built up her street smarts and guts and learn to be more practical and mindful, instead of staying with the mind of a 12 year old who needs other characters to do everything for her (Lucifer, Vaggie, Alastor) and then get praised for THEIR efforts. That's hell's royalty and our main character?
Aaand since sinners are portrayed as Charlie's "people" (as if they are a nationality), sweet babies who all deserve redemption and are called innocent by Emily (I can't believe how dumb the writers made angels be) - the true essence of exterminatons is never focused on. Adam and his exterminator army are seen in the wrong, like some kind of monsters who terrorize poor souls. However, think about this - child molesters, rapists, torturers, bullies, nazists, actual racists etc died in those exterminations. Doesnt that seem like something a lot of us would want? To have scum like this disappear as revenge for people they have hurt/driven to suicide?
Exterminations are not really an act of racism, bigotry or something like that. They are an excecution of criminals, which a lot of sinners are.
But the black and white writing is trying to conceal that rather prominent highlight of the rotten part of Charlie's plan (not all sinners deserve mercy or redemption). All that was needed was to make exterminators these icky "villains" who luuuv killing and are never willing to listen
All in all, a cartoon that has an ambitious premise that should be driven by psychological reasearch/analysis and dark serious themes... makes me roll my eyes with its cliche use of "power of friendship" and " strictly good main characters, strictly bad villains" tropes. Too bad such beautiful animation was wasted on such juvenile writing that never had any effort put into it
There shouldn't even be any villains or heroes in a setting like this. Allow the lead roles (sinners in hell) do something actually questionable and be unlikable, don't coddle the viewer in fear of making them even the slightest bit uncomfortable. Allow those, who opposes sinmers, have personalities and reasons, not cliche sociopathy for sociopathy's sake to cause forced sympathy for the main characters
Pristine "safe" writing should not have a place in adult cartoons. Or else they will stay a product that'd rather be watched by 7-14 year olds instead of adults (I can't picture a single adult over 22 who would unironically call hazbin hotel a show that tackles realistic issues in an observant way)
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