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fluffypotatey · 1 year

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hi, i'm late for the wip thing (grr busy, unfortunately) but can u tell about the 11 to 20, please? 🥹

hooooo boy you sure you wanna open that can of worms, deary 👀

i mean, I’m totally sharing just…it’s gonna take some time 😅

*coughs* sO

11. Yassifying Chick Flicks: Neither the First Nor the Last

happy pride 💅

As the title says, nothing about this story is hetero it is all homo. it’s a trope subversion on le old teen high school Chick Flicks. literally, the character’s initials tells you what their roles are (MC = main character, LI =love interest, RH = red herring, TBF = toxic best friend)

Can be interpreted as a character study on teen girls and internalized misogyny tho and i fully intend to expand on it.

12. Sunglasses Quiz

ok so this is just a cute little story of these two girlfriends who are trying to buy sunglasses, and you know how some have it where you take a quiz?

yeah, so these girlies are trying to take the quiz and end up getting……ahem, distracted 👀

anyway, the little description i write for this was “i was feeling sappy so i wrote some sappy queer love” so 🏳️‍🌈 happy pride🏳️‍🌈

“As a renowned researcher yourself,” Laura exclaimed, ignoring Pen’s comment, “it is shameful”— Pen rolled her eyes— “you, who have published many scholarly works into the world, should know better!”

Pen would have definitely shoved her girlfriend. She definitely would have if it were not for that sweet, “innocent” smile on Laura’s face. That’s what she tells herself anyway.

13. Witch boy

Repeating myself -> “LISTEN: i know this one also complete when you go to Ao3, but that's just because the 3rd part is being fucking slOW, so i said "fuck it ends nice at ch2 anyway," but i do want to add more. but yeah, to summarize: fic was inspired by a Halloween fanart i saw and i just ran with it.”

basically, it’s a modern au of bbc’s merlin but there seems to be magic leaking into “our” world every Halloween. and our lovely band of misfits (Merlin, Arthur, Gwen, Morgana, Lancelot, Gwaine, Elyan, Percival, and Leon) have taken it upon themselves to put a stop to it every Halloween. Also, slow burn romance between Merlin and Arthur bc i can never help myself. the 3rd installment is still in the works T^T but I do want to complete this one day. but yeah, here’s a snippet:

14:27 HighPriestessofthemStilletos: ARTHUR ANSWER YOUR FUCKING PHONE L'Oréal Hair: oop arthur’s in trouble!!!HoodieReigns: oh good so he’s not just doing this to me AngelQueen: He didn't even pick-up when you called? HighPriestessofthemStilletos: @HighKing_Wart I WILL BLOW UP YOUR PHONE HighPriestessofthemStilletos: DON’T TEST ME HoodieReigns: it seems he did not, in fact, pick-up when she called gwen

14. Emrys Shrine

this one is essentially a continuation of the Shrine of Emrys fic I wrote months ago but it is still in the works. Here we have Percival’s pov of the aftermath of the fic

Percival often wondered if Merlin was like him. Someone who had lived in the Druid camps as a child, but then he heard Arthur tell the tale of Merlin’s home Ealdor and his kind-hearted mother. He even met her sometime after Arthur had secured his throne from Morgana once again, and she had explained how the village has been her home since birth, how she spent her days living in it, how she had raised her darling boy in this place before he left for Camelot.

15. Lucky’s Timeline @ Beacon Hills

SUPER, SUper self indulgent fic where i insert my OCs, Lucy and Nick, into the teen wolf universe and how they interact with it. for example:

“But this is Coach’s car,” McCall said with a frown. “Is it?” Nick replied nonchalantly as he twirled the keys in his free hand, unlocking the car doors.

16. THE everchanging STORYLINE

ahaha…. so i named it that bc i’ve been writing this one for 2 years and almost every month i would change the plot. which meant i needed to reorganize the chapter list and where which scene went 🙄 (i am my own bane) this still happens and it’s been 3 years now T^T

anyway, this wip is my dc/batfam wip, aka the origins of Lucy and Nick lol. plot’s a nonchronological mystery with switching pics to outsider, minor characters, and Nick

17. Lucy Elliot: She Be Descending

literally just the previous but if Lucy was adopted by an abusive douchebag (douchebag being Thomas Elliot) and if she had a corruption arc (ngl i like corruption arc Lucy more she’s unhinged). assassin instead of vigilante and self-made leader of underground elites who “run” Gotham (killed the previous one and he was so impressed by her underhanded moves he placed her in his will instead of his son lmao)

anyway, snippet of Lucy and her (future ex) husband:

“Why darling”— she let out a scandalized gasp— “do you really think I would stray from you?” He merely gazed at her, eyes blank and cold. Lucy stared back, not one to be challenged. She knew he was just riling her up. Not that she was surprised in the slightest of his behavior. Lucy knew this was because of his alleged rivalry with a dear friend of hers. A dear friend whose father was the host of this gala. The gala said dear friend was said to be attending. “I would never doubt a woman who gave me a solemn vow.”

18. Mob Boss Lucy, Basically

remember what i wrote for 17? now let’s shift it to the right again! it’s me taking plot from 16 & 17 and trying to give Nick and Lucy an original story. Lucy still becomes a self-made mob boss but there’s no Gotham, no vigilantes.

the story here is that Lucy and Nick are building their power whilst evading the law and destroying any evidence that would lead to them bc their being hunted by a detective (who’s also Lucy’s childhood friend) and a private investigator

19. Dandelions

explained here

20. not really a sequel but it happens after

so this one is a continuation/sequel to 16. Lucy and Nick are happily married and adopted a really sweet kid (Caleb) but— oh no! horrible mercenaries attack Lucy and Caleb on their walk to the park! It leaves Lucy in critical condition and caused a magical outburst from Caleb and— whoops, there’s now a rift in time and space 🤷🏻‍♀️

i don’t really have much written and it’s self indulgent anyway so yeah

AND THERE YOU GO 🎉 phew that took me a bit but it was fun talking about them so thanks for the ask @thiamsxbitch 💕💕💕💕💕

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cleromancy · 6 months

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i also think that there's way less that meaningfully separates a fanfic writer from a writer dc hired to write an established character than people are comfortable talking about. because it *does* get into sticky issues like intellectual property and unspoken rules for whats allowed in transformative works and what does it mean when the Official Sponsored Corporate Product is sometimes unabashedly dogshit and you personally know at least 6 fans who could do better in their sleep... so what does it mean when the holder of the IP, the legal custodian of the sprawling long-running collaborative storytelling universe, is actively terrible at the job?

and where i was originally going with this was, like. theres a subcategory of "batfam" fic writers who have stepped away from the comics universe canon and created an adjacent universe to play in, often without having read canon comics. which is i think at least as valid as something like the cartoon young justice, which was ostensibly an adaptation but in reality was just. they took character concepts from comics and did a whole new thing with them. and it is generally pretty easy to figure out whether someones playing in the fanon universe or if its based on one of the ones from the comics, or an alternate like one of the cartoons or games or elseworlds. it would be convenient if the fanon had a tag for itself though lol. fandom cinematic batfam universe or somfing.

#dc #its like earth.... 69. lol

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evilwriter37 · 1 year

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Who would you rather meet you and adopt you into their found family: Rocket Raccoon, Batman, or Bucky Barnes? (Or, if you feel like longer post, order them + why?)

Crap, I can't choose between Batman or Bucky Barnes.

I think I'll go with Batman though, given all the Batfam stuff you've shown me that I love! I'm like, adjacently in this fandom now, lol.

It would be great to be loved the way I am by a parental figure, and Batman seems like the right guy to do it.

#asks #knowerofuselessfacts

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jasonntodd · 1 year

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Ask Game for DC - 6,7, and 9

6. which ship fans are the most annoying?

tbh, for dc specifically i don’t really know bc i don’t engage too much into the ship discourse for any of the dc characters, but specifically for the batfam (i’m assuming this is what you’re prob asking most about bc i mostly engage in batfam stuff). if anything, if someone ships any of the batfam/batbros together and/or with bruce, yeah, that’s annoying and gross and disgusting. smh. shame on you.

7. what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?

ooo this is a good one. tbh i think lowkey dick if we’re talking batfam adjacent 😭 he’s one of the reasons why i got into dc but specifically the batfam so i do love him and he hold a very special place in my heart bc i started reading his comics and then going from there into the batfam. but the way ppl treat him like he’s this uwu baby girl woobification of him is kinda….annoying. let him be angry let him be flawed! stop treating him like he’s a child.

9. worst part of canon

we all know the answer to this: bruce beating his children. oh that and alfred being dead, like, what the fuck. but if you want more specifics, then the fact that bruce is now…poor??? and does not own or is the ceo of wayne enterprise??? i dislike that immensely. like i get it, nightwing’s now rich and all but i personally do not vibe with that at ALL. wow i have a lot of gripe w canon lol.

#personal #THIS WAS FUN !!!#I LIKE THIS THANK YOU ANON HEHE #ask and thou shalt receive

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tonyglowheart · 3 years

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okay the more I think about this, the more I like this idea

So, premise is that I'm not sold on Tim as Red Hood in reverse batfam AUs, since like if any of them Get why Batman can't kill (both as like the symbol/title bc otherwise GPD couldn't be friendly or tolerant of the Bat as an official stance, and as like a personal line for Bruce), it'd be Tim imo.

so I'm thinking, it'd be interesting if his death wasn't caused by Joker (passe, tired, society has progressed past the need for Joker), and instead the second Batlad's death was caused by a freak accident in the middle of a Riddler scheme. It's the kind of thing where, yeah Riddler caused them to be in the situation, but the death itself isn't *really* Riddler's fault. It's tragic and a lot of blame all around and a lot of ppl blaming themselves. Riddler retires from villainy afterwards out of grief and guilt tho.

Years later, when Jason is the new Batlad (I think he still tried to steal the wheels off the Batmobile, but he gave Bruce a much-needed wakeup call when he like hit him with a tire iron and shouted how everyone on the streets knows to avoid the Bat now since Batlad died, everyone knows he's gotten more brutal and less discerning and almost as bad as the villains, or even worse bc at least some of the rogues abide by honor amongst thieves/the street folk. etc etc Batman takes him to Bruce who takes him in, Jason is suspicious bc why would the Bat take him to Bruce of all ppl even tho it's an open secret the Bat is funded by Wayne, maybe even a rumor that the Bat IS Bruce Wayne, and he finds the Cave and extorts Bruce into taking him on as Batlad, partly so Jason can also give back and partly so he can keep an eye on Bruce, the big dummy)-

But years later, a new.... villain? vigilante? antihero? emerges, calling himself Enigma. He sets up these elaborate tests of morality for bad guys - not necessarily rogues but like. corrupt politicians, dirty cops, biased judges or prosecutors, etc. - wherein they're given an elaborate scheme, kind of like a Saw trap ig but it's always fair, there's always a chance for the person to make a moral choice/personal sacrifice that shows they're more than just corrupt or self-serving. Batman thinks it's Edward Nygma, come out of retirement to dabble in the antihero field, and tracks him down- but no, he is retired, and has been growing his business designing and selling escape room designs for years now. He has no clue who this new guy is or what his deal is. So back to square one.

The first couple times, this new Engima guy is pretty good at diverting Batman from interfering and his schemes go off, more often to the detriment/death of the guy being tested- tho a couple times it did work and the ppl in it came out changed. Traumatized, ofc lol, but like with a change in perspective and priority. But eventually, Batman starts wising up to the diversions, and eventually it's revealed that Enigma is Tim. And, well, the clues WERE there for Bruce to see, if he'd just seen them.

I think this works w Tim not being able to fully return to the fold, bc like having died himself he knows just how incentivizing for personal change the threat of real actual death can be. He may not be setting out to kill people, but he's also not averse to setting up situations where they may well die. Maybe as he starts returning more to the fold, he pivots to being sort of Oracle-like, where he deals more with information and giving the Batfam tip-offs and leads or info support, in addition to like patrolling on the ground maybe. But like, patrolling wouldn't be his main gig, I feel like he'd become sort of information mastermind/broker, the way Jason took on being like a mob boss so he could control the trade better to prevent kids from getting involved, etc.

But anyway, for me I feel like this works as a concept better, where Tim is the one who died and came back and then occupies a sort of Batfam adjacent but unable to bring himself back fully into the fold concept, vs a straight "Tim is Red Hood" concept.

#dc blogging #tim drake #jason todd #Damian would be the first Batlad and he'd choose to leave the position and strike out on his own #idk what title he'd take on maaaybe Black Bat but torn abt that bc that's Cass's thing....#but I feel like Black Bat does make sense as a name as like. a stepping point between Batlad and like. when he assumes the Batman mantle #ofc if Damian is Black Bat as his young adult title then it sets up for Jason to become Red Bat when he ages out of Batlad lol #ofc when Dickie comes on the scene he will be Robin :) but yeah like. I don't think there should be Robin before Dick in these AUs #like. it's *his mother's name* for him! Batman has no reason to come up w Robin #and then when Dickie comes he starts naming everything Bat-everything #and inevitably the Cave is now Batcave and Batman's car which was just The Car is now the Batmobile #and various things become increasingly more Bat-themed to Dick's mounting amusement and delight

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bigskydreaming · 4 years

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Making this its own post because replying to the ask got so weirdly formatted I can’t even. Oh tumblr. You work so well.

@themessofthecentury asked:

jsksjf my tumblr notifs are bugging and i didnt see your post but!!! The patron Saint of Robins?? I am much intrigue!!

(This is from this ask game, just....gotten to late, lololol. And I still have more I’m getting to, no worries. Just had a rough couple days is all, laid me up a bit.)

Okay, so The Patron Saint of Robins is kinda like the situation at the end of Grayson, except also not at all. And actually this is one of my older WIPs, and according to Scrivener I started it in 2015 afhislfhalhfalf, so it really has nothing to do with that. Also, its Young Justice-verse, but for two specific reasons:

1) YJ-verse is my go-to for Good Dad Bruce Wayne, when I don’t want to actually tackle the issues I have with his and his kids’ dynamic in comic book canon. I don’t carry over things like the adoption issue or the Robin succession into YJ fics, as I don’t think there’s anything that suggests they’re ever a specific issue in YJ and I don’t feel a need to make them one. So pretty much anything and everything I write in YJ goes with the backstory that Dick’s already adopted by Season One, and he’s the one to grant each later Robin permission to use the mantle, with no conflict over that, and more of a pre-Crisis transition to Nightwing than the post-Crisis firing from Robin. And this fic inherently needs Good Dad Bruce Wayne to work, lol.

2) I needed Klarion the Witch-Boy. Who of course exists in comic book canon, but is muuuuuch different there, and I just needed him to be a little demonic evil shithead, who sets everything in motion to get payback on the heroes for thwarting the Light in Season One, and he targets Robin due to being the oft-cited ‘first of the baby brat heroes’ and the ‘heart of the cape community.’

You don’t really need to be familiar with YJ canon at all for this one, as it goes sharply AU from after Season One, and only faintly and vaguely references specific events from that season. And I use my own YJ-ized version of the Titans as much as the actual YJ Team.

So basically, the plot of this one is to take revenge on the heroes for spoiling his game in Season One, Klarion plays a new game, by putting a chaos curse on Robin. It essentially erases him from peoples’ memories, though he’s perfectly able to make new ones. If he re-introduces himself to someone ask Dick Grayson, for instance, they don’t suddenly remember who Dick Grayson is or was, but they don’t forget about him again from that point onward, its like they meet him for the first time as a stranger.

But the curse part of things is only Batman can break it and restore everyone’s memories of Dick and his actual history, and only by identifying him for who he really is. And Dick can’t be part of breaking his own curse or else it seals it and makes it permanent and unbreakable forever.

Which of course leaves Dick completely miserable at first, understandably, and Bruce (and everyone else Dick knows, to varying different degrees) feeling some kind of loss but with no idea what it is they think or feel that they’re missing. Dick makes some half-hearted attempts at starting a new life for himself in Gotham, and in the process befriends a street kid named Jason Todd, though Dick introduces himself to Jason with just the name Robin.

The way the curse operates is it restitches together peoples’ memories to cover up the gaps where memories of him would go. So for instance, even though Jason never knew Dick before the curse, he was familiar with Batman and Robin just as much as any Gothammite was.....but due to the curse, the name Robin, upon meeting Dick, had no special meaning to him or anyone else. As far as he knew, Batman had always operated on his own in Gotham, the first teen superhero was that Speedy kid in Star City, etc. So when Jason first meets Dick, he just thinks he’s some dude whose name happens to be Robin.

Eventually, because Dick’s been kinda torturing himself by spying on Bruce just to ‘keep an eye on him’ and still watch his back, and he’s recognized by now that Bruce is mourning his loss without even knowing that he’s missing something....so Dick, who has also kinda come to see Jason as a little brother figure due to watching out for him as well....decides to kill two birds with one stone, unfortunate pun not intended. (Jason doesn’t die in this one, lol). Basically, Dick puts in motion the chain of events that lead Jason to stealing Batman’s tires, because he doesn’t know EXACTLY what Bruce will do but he knows it’ll get his attention in a big way and Bruce will take it from there.

One thing leads to another, Jason ends up living with Bruce and when eventually he wants to be trained by Bruce so he can do what he does and protect kids like he used to be.....when asked to pick a name....Jason names himself after the guy who always looked out for him, and who led to him being found by Bruce in the first place. He doesn’t know that his friend ‘Robin’ steered him towards those tires deliberately, just to bring him and Bruce into contact, but he does credit him with making the suggestion that ‘inadvertently’ (as far as he knows) enabled his and Bruce’s introduction, and so he names himself in honor of the boy who helped him and who he tried to track down again to similarly help, after Bruce adopted him, but was never able to find again.

Over the years, Dick also ends up steering Tim, Cass, Duke and Damian to Bruce in different ways than comic book canon (Steph and Babs’ debuts remain their own, as family adjacent but not family specifically) and thus is integral to the forming of the Batfam and has a connection with them even before the curse ultimately ends up broken and he’s able to reclaim his full identity. And each of them end up Robin at least briefly, like Steph is never Robin in this AU, and sticks with Spoiler, whereas Cass IS briefly Robin before becoming Batgirl after Babs. I did this for a few different reasons...

One, I really like that Cass is never Robin in main continuity as it creates a different dynamic between her and Dick than most of their siblings have, BUT I’ve always been curious to play around what Cass-as-Robin might even be like, just for an AU. Two, part of the Black Bat and Batgirl but never Robin sequence of mantles for Cass in the comic book continuity is like.....although it doesn’t get explored nearly enough, Babs was as much a kind of mother figure for Cass as Bruce was a father figure, despite Babs’ young age. So it makes more sense for Cass to stick more to just Bat-mantles than to ever be a Robin in the comic books. But in YJ, Babs is even younger, and just way too young to have the specific kind of dynamic that leads to that in the comic books, so its not as unreasonable IMO for her to have a different dynamic in her early days in the family here, before becoming closer with Babs and taking up the Batgirl mantle after she moves on to become Oracle.

And then also, and this is also the primary reason for making Duke a Robin briefly, before Damian is old enough....I got hung up on the title and it just didn’t work as well if it was Robins + Cass and Duke, lololol. See, in addition to helping steer the family into the points of introduction that make them a family, over the years he also acts as like, a guardian angel figure to the various family members, looking out for them and interceding in times of extreme danger, like when Jason is almost killed by the Joker. He’s always in disguise, but the kids eventually compare notes and realize there’s a singular figure behind each of their introductions to Bruce and the guy swooping out of nowhere to save their behinds whenever they’re most in danger, and Jason eventually connects this back to the guy who apparently NOT so coincidentally suggested he go after the Batmobile’s tires that fateful night, and the kids end up jokingly/not-so-jokingly referring to this figure as the Patron Saint of Robins. (Shout-out to the occasional mentions/allusions of Jason’s Catholicism).

They never tell Bruce about this figure (at least before Bruce starts to put together clues on his own), because they all figured out that for whatever reason, this person despite wanting them all to meet Bruce seems to want to avoid Bruce himself, and they kinda want to respect that as a kind of payback for his help, and also like....Bruce, even a kinder, gentler Bruce, is still Bruce. And when Bruce is gonna Bruce, that means Batparanoia. And all of them for various reasons DO trust that this guy has nothing but good intentions towards them, and so they don’t want to like....ruin or tarnish the positivity they associate with his intercession in their lives with paranoia or treating him like a bad guy. Which ultimately is really just smoke and mirrors for saying that he’s kinda a ‘just for them’ secret. Its a Robin thing.

(Until its not).

Because meanwhile, Dick, in between meeting the various Batfam members and pulling strings and looking out for them from the shadows, at first travels the world looking for ways to break his curse. But when ultimately its clear that the only way to break it is the loophole built into it already, Bruce identifying him for who he really is, but without Dick doing anything to steer him towards the answer, Dick settles into a new hero identity as Nightwing, and forms the Teen Titans, a public group of young superheroes (minus Roy and Wally, unfortunately, but still with Donna, Garth, Raven, Kory, ignoring season 3 Vic and also Terra because AU redemption arc what what, etc). And the Teen Titans avoid both the Young Justice Team and the Justlce League with EXTREME measures, much to the other heroes’ confusion and aggravation, because in the early days of the Titans, in a moment of what he’d term weakness, on one of his ‘bad days,’ Dick tells them enough of his story that they’re able to put together a good sense of what happened and who he really is by reading between the lines and what he leaves unsaid....

BUT as a result, all end up extremely committed to not mixing and mingling casually with the rest of the cape community because they don’t want to risk dropping any hints about the guy under Nightwing’s mask, in case that might count as steering Batman towards clues and seal the curse for good. So I have a lot of fun with having the Titans just nope out of the scene the second the bad guys are defeated even when they have to team up with other heroes, leaving the other heroes confused as hell and trying not to be all ‘WHY DON’T YOU LIKE US??”

Anyway, so yeah, that’s the gist of this one, lol. With it of course following the eventual plot that like...the Batfam starts to Detect and put things together.

ANYWHO!

Snippet

Damian versus Klarion: Round One

“Aww, its adorable that you think you’re in my league,” the Witch-Boy cooed in an absolute mockery of sympathy. Damian bristled, but before he could do anything more than that, he was faced with a much more pressing matter as reality completely lost its mind.

The walls of the cavern fell away in an instant, only to be replaced with a whirling dervish of winds all around them, as if they now stood in the center of a cyclone that bled red and silver and black. It shrieked and wailed in a chorus of voices just on the other side of being comprehensible, a symphony of the damned that set every nerve in Damian’s body aflame with a primal instinct to get out, to find silence, to be anywhere but here.

He’d barely staggered a step backwards when the ground erupted beneath him, splitting apart into jagged obsidian shards that bobbed precariously in the sea of magma barely glimpsed through cracks now spiderwebbing their way across the floor. Spears of lightning burst upwards through them, stabbing impossibly at the heavens rather than raining down from them. They hissed and crackled as they flickered like forked serpent tongues of electric violet and black. The forks becoming branches, the pillars of sky-shattering light transforming into the trunks of great trees that grew upwards and outward, weaving a canopy overhead. One that wept violently red leaves that fell gently to the ground, only to hiss and bubble like acid once they did.

“See, normally this is when I’d hit someone with a little razzle-dazzle like this,” Klarion called out over the song of madness he’d created, as it crooned and careened wildly all around them. He snapped his fingers, and in the span of a second it all ceased. Reality reaffirmed itself, and all was right with the world once more…except now the two of them stood at the end of a hallway in Wayne Manor.

Damian stumbled, the sudden reappearance of firm ground paradoxically being the thing to challenge his balance. The demon boy standing beside him crooked his thumb and forefinger in the semblance of a gun, the smile pasted across his face one of wickedly gleeful malice.

“But you, kiddo, you’re special. Cuz there’s nothing I could do to you now that could top what I’ve already done, so why try when I can just savor the moment instead?”

“What are you babbling about?” Damian demanded roughly. In the wake of what the Witch-Boy had just conjured up with nothing more than a gesture, he was keenly aware of how flimsy a shield his bravado made. He just had absolutely no idea what else to fall back on.

Klarion only threw back his head and laughed though, skipping merrily down the hall as he did.

“I know something you don’t know,” he sing-songed and Damian lost what little grasp of his patience he’d managed to hang onto.

“You overestimate my need for an answer. Attempt to intimidate me all you wish, but I have no desire to indulge your little game any further.”

Klarion jerked to a stop and spun around, his face screwed into a childish pout. He stomped his foot, petulance personified. “I’m not intimidating you anymore, I’m gloating! Ugh, you’re so stupid! They’re completely different, how can you not tell?”

Every light in the hallway flickered and fizzed abruptly. The walls wavered, bubbled, momentarily molten as if made of wax.

Again Damian was reminded just how mercurial this being he was faced with was, and how dangerous. Perhaps, as Father would say, this was not the time to indulge his own instinctive inclinations. Or as Todd would put it, just because you’re already fucked, that’s no reason to fuck yourself over more than you have to.

Crude as his older brother was, there was occasional merit to his…pithiness. Not that he would be admitting that any time soon, of course.

“Fine. What is it you wish to gloat about then?” Damian grated out. The appeasement, such as it was, tried its best to stick in his throat before finally clawing its way free. But at least it proved worth the effort when the godling’s mood reverted back to impishness as readily as with the flip of a switch.

“Well. Its like this, you see.” Klarion said. He dragged it out as he folded both legs underneath him to sit cross-legged in the air, plopping his head into his hands. “I did a baaaaaaaaaaaaad, bad thing to your family, a loooooong time ago. And none of you have done anything about it, because you don’t even know! Isn’t that funny? Doesn’t matter how big a hero Daddy Bats is if he doesn’t even know what needs saving huh? Little Catch-22 there, you might say.”

“Yes. Quite hysterical,” Damian said dryly. “So what is it you claim to have done then?”

The Witch-Boy just sat there, regarding him with amusement, and the seconds marched on into minutes. Damian’s skin crawled. Prickling with impatience and possibly something…more. He wasn’t quite ready to name it anxiety or something as melodramatic as all that yet. In fact, he’d rather not put a name to it at all, but today did not appear to be a day for configuring things to his liking.

Klarion’s wicked grin grew as if sensing his thoughts, though to the best of his knowledge (and Damian did quickly ransack the library of his memory just to be sure) there was no indication telepathy was included among the Chaos Lord’s many, many powers. And still that detestable smile stretched slowly wider all the same, in perfect synchronization with the rising tide of Damian’s unease. Perhaps the Witch-Boy’s file was in need of annotation.

“How many doors would you say are in this hallway?”

“What? Seven.” Damian snapped out his answer, annoyed by the non sequitur. Not to mention baffled. Was it too much to expect even a semblance of linear thought from the Chaos brat?

“Are you suuuuuuure?” The Witch-Boy stretched his query out obnoxiously. “Maybe you should count again. Just for kicks and giggles.”

Damian throttled back each and every retort attempting to spring to his lips, stuffing them back down and cramming a lid on everything he most dearly wished to say to this most vexing of…shitheads. Once again, it appeared as though nothing less than Todd’s preferred form of nomenclature would suffice. Wonderful. On top of everything else Damian had to deal with today, he seemed to be finding common ground with the man all over the place. Was there no end to the indignities he must suffer?

But marshaling his own formidable willpower, Damian took a deep breath and indulged the Chaos Lord, glancing his eyes down the length of the hallway and counting out each doorway one by one. There was his own room of course, with Cassandra’s to the right of his, and the room Brown used when staying over to the right of hers. That was three. Then there was Thomas directly across from his own room, with Drake to his right and Todd just beyond that, with Father’s room at the very end of the hall, his master suite staggered and with no direct opposite like the others. Seven.

Except all of a sudden there was a door directly opposite his father’s. For a total of eight.

Damian’s brow furrowed in consternation. The faint whispers of uncertainty already seeded throughout him bore fruit, ripening into poisonous stabbings of doubt.

“That’s not real,” he stated with as much conviction as he could muster.

The Witch-Boy’s smile only grew wider still. “Isn’t it, though?”

“There’s never been a door there before,” Damian persisted, striding confidently down the hall towards it. The Chaos Lord flitted ahead of him, inverting til he was upside down and skipping merrily once more, though this time from the ceiling.

“Or has it been there all along?” He sing-songed some more.

“I would think we might have noticed if it had been,” Damian growled.

“Yes, you’d think, wouldn’t you? You are all supposed to be a family of detectives, I thought. Makes you wonder…if you could miss this, what else might you have failed to notice?”

Damian snarled to himself and did his best to shut out the demon boy’s prattling. He quickened his strides, eating up the length of the hallway in his haste to reach its end. He wasn’t sure what opening the door would prove, let alone what bewilderment the godling had conjured on its other side, but it appeared the only end to this game of his was through it, so let there be an end to it already.

And yet, for all his certainty - or best facsimile of it - he couldn’t help but pause once he reached the door in question. His hand hovered within reach of its brass knob, but some instinct, some…caution, held him at bay. As much as he wanted to dismiss all this as just one more of the Chaos Lord’s inane charades, there was a tension in the air that felt too weighty to be the product of just magical conjuring. Something more was in play here. Real forces were at work. His father might disdain magic, but Damian had been around enough of it himself to know when true power had been raised. And the span of empty space between his hand and this hither-to-unseen doorknob held more of it than Damian had felt throughout all the mad warpings Klarion had made of reality thus far.

“Are you sure you want to do that?” Klarion asked from somewhere overhead. His voice, usually pitched to carry, was so soft for a moment Damian mistook it for his own inner doubts. “Some doors are easier to open than to close again, you know.”

Even knowing the goading for what it was couldn’t stop Damian then, and with a simple breath to fortify himself, he reached for the knob, spun it once, and shoved the door open all in a single sharp movement.

The Witch-Boy giggled up above.

The door swung wide, a forceful arc that should have revealed anything and everything within it all at once; the better to react quickly to whatever that might be. Fine in principle, perfect in execution, but thwarted by one small detail:

There was nothing on the other side.

And not in the sense of it being just an empty room, but true nothingness. A pitch-black abyss darker than the deepest night, yawning forth from the doorway in a vast, impenetrable shroud. Nor was anything hidden in the darkness, Damian knew, even if just intuitively. He could feel it, that he stood on the edge of an impossible cliff, that there was nothing beyond this threshold but an aching chasm of emptiness and loss. The surety of it hung in the air, thick and heavy, a miasma that seeped through to his side of the doorway and clung to him like the moisture of a fog beads upon the skin.

Klarion’s head suddenly popped up alongside him, hovering just over his shoulder.

Albeit still upside down.

“Well that doesn’t seem right,” he mused, tapping at his lips with a forefinger. “What do you suppose is meant to be in there?”

The last of Damian’s brittle patience shattered.

“Enough! What is the meaning of all this, demon? Speak plainly, for once in your miserable existence!”

His self-preservation instincts and the reminder of just who it was he was shouting at kicked in too little too late, but he wouldn’t take his exasperated fury back even if he could. He was who he was after all. But fortunately, that described the Witch-Boy just as accurately, and rather take offense or perceive any actual threat from Damian’s rage, the Chaos Lord just shrieked with laughter and sprung backwards. He flipped right side up, still hovering in mid-air, and clapped his hands with glee.

“Oh, I should have done this ages ago,” Klarion sang out. “Why, you’re almost as fun as he used to be. Back before he got all droll and serious, that is. He’s no fun at all anymore, nothing like this. Never wants to play, always just running back to his tower with that little bitch of a demoness.”

His face soured like he’d just sucked on a lemon. But rather than stop there, his countenance kept morphing into an increasingly savage scowl, the longer he ranted. The hallway was suddenly sweltering, baking with unseen heat that twisted the air into shimmering ribbons. The small horns sprouting from his forehead burst into scimitars of flame that cut through those ribbons and set them similarly ablaze.

“Always putting on airs like she’s some kind of royalty, just because her Daddy Dearest put the fear into a few peasants back in the day,” the Witch-Boy snarled viciously. “As if that’s enough to put her on par with the likes of me. No one is the likes of me. NO ONE!”

Reality itself quaked with the force of his shout. White-blue flames spat forth and crescendoed down the length of the corridor, splashing against its walls and searing them to a crisp. Damian braced himself for all the good it would do, keenly aware of the void still gaping hungrily behind his back, but before the fire could become an actual danger to him as well, all was quiet once more.

Silence hung in the air much like the demon boy, poised yet motionless. Suspended. Waiting.

And then Klarion simply inhaled and brushed his hands down the front of his garments, smoothing out the wrinkles as he reclaimed his calm. The corridor restored itself to its former self, curtains of vintage reality unrolling from the ceiling to the floor as though papering over the damage. Damian felt rather than saw when the portal behind him swung shut and was replaced with the expanse of ivory paint and ornate sconces he was used to seeing in its place.

“I am one of a kind, after all,” Klarion finally remarked. It was a casual drawl offered forth almost off-handedly, as if more a reminder to himself than uttered for anyone else’s sake. He used one hand to spell out letters in the air. They appeared and vanished again in bursts of fireworks and fluorescent flame. “U-N-I-Q-U-E.”

“As I, apparently, am not,” Damian said, seizing upon the Chaos Lord’s restored calm and good cheer. “Who is this ‘he’ you mentioned? If I’m to be pitted against him as entertainment in your eyes, might I at least know his name?”

“Nuh-uh-uh,” the Witch-Boy scolded. He wagged his finger at Damian. “No spoilers. That’s not how the game is played.”

Keenly aware of the boy’s power once more, Damian gritted his teeth and pressed on. “Well, if there are to be rules, shouldn’t I at least know what those are?”

Klarion sucked in a deep breath, drawing himself up along with his inhalation as though preparing for some great speech…and instead just toppling backward, flopping onto an extravagant fainting couch that suddenly appeared beneath him, though similarly floating in the air.

“I can’t recall at the moment.” His now-faint voice drifted up from where he lay buried amid a mountain of pillows. “I’ve had a terribly exhausting day. But you’re supposed to be a detective, remember? Go…I don’t know. Detect things.”

He flapped an arm at Damian dismissively, and then crooked a finger into a twirling motion that set his divan to spinning in lazy circles.

“Isn’t life grand?” Klarion sighed fondly. “With all its twists and turns, its eddies and swirls. I mean, take the two of us. Scant hours ago, we were mortal enemies, and just look at us now.”

The Witch-Boy lazily rolled his head to the side as the couch drifted to bring him face-to-face with Damian. His lips spread wide in that malevolent, wicked grin of his once again, but somehow it managed to be even wider than any he’d shown off before. His eyes blazed with a hellish inner light, and his voice, when next he spoke, dropped deep into a demonic register. A bass that boomed forth and set Damian’s very bones to rattling.

“Ain’t we got fun?”

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mattzerella-sticks · 4 years

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hi! i’m new to reading dc, because i hear new 52 and rebirth kinda suck, do you have any batfamily recommendations?

Welcome aboard! I’m gonna say something controversial - new 52 and Rebirth aren’t totally bad. Don’t get me wrong, before Flashpoint Batfamily was GOING PLACES. But I think they started strong with Batman in new 52 (like the Court of Owls wer fantastic and Julia Pennyworth is amazing) but then the aftermath of this Batman v. Joker fight during Scott Snyder’s run kinda fizzled the Batman run. And don’t get me STARTED on the bullshit Tom King has done. Not even James Tynion can save the Rebirth Batman title (but that’s because the powers that be probably had a vision that’s most likely been canned given how a lot of the brass was let go). I digress...

For New 52, I highly recommend: Batman (up until the Batman mantle gets passed, which is 50 or so issues in), Grayson (I enjoyed the spy atmosphere, plus the introduction of Helena Bertinelli, Tiger, and Midnighter - officially), Red Hood and the Outlaws (although the early issues and how they treated Kori are iffy), DEFINITELY Batgirl (especially the Gail Simone run and then the Babs Starr run, Batgirl of Burnside ftw) and - I’m including her into the Batfamily - the Harley Quinn series, because that’s good no matter WHAT. Things I’ve heard good things about but haven’t fully in-depth read were We Are Robin and Catwoman, although the former ends kind of unsatisfyingly. And, again, not Batfamily but adjacent - Gotham Academy. I was SO MAD when it ended because it was one of the best comics DC was producing. Oh and there was a Robin series where he has a giant bat!!! That was really good, too.

Rebirth they really fucked themselves over for the Batfam. Don’t even look at Batman, the first few issues are okay but then it gets muddled in this Bane plot and ‘War of Jokes and Riddles’ which was the WORST Batman storyline ever. Went on too long imo because you kind of forget this is all Bruce telling Selena about his ‘worst sin’ even though she’d be DTF no matter what. Plus there’s so much emphasis on Kite Man (i think even an issue is dedicated to his POV which makes no sense given the context the story’s being told but again Tom King SUCKS). It’ll make you feel like you read a comic book of How I Met Your Mother. Only Batman issues I recommend are the ones that are Flash crossovers because those are my favs for obvi reasons. What you want to do is get into first year of Rebirth Detective Comics because 1) Cassandra Cain 2) Stephanie Brown 3) Kate Kane 4) Clayface!?!?! 5) Tim Drake 6) Dr. Oktober; Honestly it was such a good ensemble piece (James Tynion is an awesome writer, he’s not a miracle worker unfortunately). That was a good run, although it does change plot at a certain point - which was sad - but it still feels like a Batman book even after the ensemble leaves, better than the actual Batman title. So sticking with that over the Batman main series is good. I think Rebirth Outsiders was trying to capture that magic except the writing isn’t that good plus there were a bunch of creative differences that delayed the first issue and I lost any excitement for it (which was sad because I love all the characters in it - Duke, Black Lightning, and Katana). Batgirl, again, although you’ll come to a point where it stops being amazing - and that is when she ditches her Babs Starr costume for something AWFUL. #BringBackBurnsideBatgirl Once you see the costume change either lower your expectations or move on because it doesn’t recover. I’ve heard good things about the Catwoman series but I haven’t read it. What I have read is Harley Quinn (again unofficial Bat family member) and that has been consistently amazing (even if the last few issues gave Harley questional/straightwashed tastes). DEFINITE reads though that shouldn’t be too long (because DC likes ending good things) are Batwoman and Batgirl & the Birds of Prey. The Batwoman comic was too good for this world, we need more Kate Kane in our lives. And the Birds of Prey series felt like the movie a bit. They definitely seemed like friends (unlike the new 52 version, which was AWFUL) and there’s one story where the men of Gotham get sick that is so good I’m waiting on DC to turn it into an animated feature. Those titles are both like twenty or so issues. There’s a Midnigther and Apollo miniseries that was so great (also unofficial member). Red Hood and the Outlaws I liked, but after Roy leaves it lost the magic. Rebirth Nightwing was good at first, but Tom King ruined it even though he doesn’t write for that title. Best storyline was when he gets involved with this group for reformed criminals while in Bludhaven. The most recent storyline wasn’t bad, in a sense. The characters brought on were interesting. It was just apbrupt and clearly not what the actual writer had in mind, but they had to write around Tom King. And overall the character of Nightwing suffered. Young Justice doesn’t feel too canonical (and Drake is a stupid name); Teen Titans is okay but Damian is an edgelord.

Moving on from that, outside of Rebirth and New 52, some other titles that I’ve enjoyed featuring the Batfamily were: Cassandra Cain’s Batgirl, Stephanie Brown’s Batgirl, Gotham City Sirens, Batman, Inc., Batman & Robin (with Dick as Batman, Damian as Robin), the Outsiders (the spin-off from Titans, probably in the mid-2000s with Dick Grayson leading)...

There was an interesting Detective Comics arc I read about the GCPD starring Renee Montoya that dealt with her ‘coming out’ (in the loosest of terms given how it happened).

A Batman/Superman arc I love revisiting is when they re-introduce Supergirl (and speaking of Batman/Superman, find the issue(s) where Superman gets affected by silver kryptonite and turns into a stoner because THAT was funny)

I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention No Man’s Land or Batman Year One because those two kind of establish Gotham and the Batman character... You could read the Killing Joke but you can easily sum the entire story up with one panel (probably one of the first images that pops up when you google The Killing Joke). A better, edgier Batman story - imo - is when he gets addicted to Venom. Or the Death of Jason Todd - which reminds me Under the Red Hood is a good story! (I didn’t read the comic lol but I did watch the movie - Jensen Ackles ftw).

If you’re looking for kooky, anything from the 40s up to before Crisis on Infinite Earths where ANYTHING went. From World’s Finest to the Batman title, they got to some pretty insane shit. Very campy. Although the nineties-early 2000′s were campy in their own way, like so on the other end of the spectrum from ‘camp’ that it became camp again. There’s two different Batman storylines that were VERY anti-drugs (Shadow of the Bat was the running title, I think; one story against weed and the other against LSD) that were so ridiculous and trying to push kids away from doing drugs that you couldn’t help but realize how ridiculous and over-the-top this was.

Finally there are Elseworlds titles. Everyone always raves for Batman: Gotham by Gaslight but I think two very interesting takes on a Batman of a different world are: Batman - Holy Terror, and Batman: Nosferatu. There’s also an Elseworlds with Barbara as Batwoman and a female Joker (Batgirl: Thrillkiller I believe) and one that has Catwoman as the hero of Gotham and Bruce Wayne as a sadistic killer.

Hope at least one of these suggestions helps 😀

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