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fuzziekins · 11 months

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Admiration. Bonding. Connecting. Paired with Elsamaren Love Comic Chapter 2 co-written with and art created by Jessi-Skylark. 1. 3.

Elsa had always been an early riser, prepared for the day ahead and the many tasks she had as queen. Then again, sometimes she had been lucky to sleep fully through the night. But there was something about sleeping under the stars…about being in Northuldra…that was just so comforting. So relaxing. So freeing. As much as she loved Arendelle and still considered it her home, it wasn’t quite the same sensation she had here.

She stretched her arms over her head, letting out a yawn while her eyes fluttered open. What a night…. What a dream.

I can’t wait to tell Honeymaren about it, she thought.

Suddenly bursting with energy, Elsa flicked her fingers and transformed her nightgown into her typical attire. She exited her hut and took a breath, feeling the magic of nature flow through her veins. Glancing around the grounds, she noticed some of the Northuldra already hard at work for the day. She wondered what Honeymaren would be doing. She could be anywhere…. Honeymaren did so much for her people, after all. She helped gather food. She cared for the reindeer. She protected them. She was strong; brave; reliable; beautiful….

Wait, what?

Elsa shook her head.

She….

She was admirable.

That’s what she meant.

Honeymaren was admirable.

Anyone in her position would be, after all.

Never mind.

Letting out a breath, Elsa opted to make her way towards the reindeer. That was likely one of the best places to start. Even if she didn’t find her, surely someone would point her in the direction.

Plus, she had the baby reindeer she had befriended that first night to use as a cover.

She could already imagine that interaction.

‘Hello little one, yes, it’s wonderful to see you, too. By the way, have you seen Honeymaren anywhere?’

She wasn’t turning into Kristoff, was she?

She lightly shuddered at the thought.

Spirits, no thank you!

As she made her way down the path, Elsa couldn’t help but take in her surroundings. No matter how little or how much time she spent in the forest, she couldn’t get over its natural beauty. Truly she was one of the most captivating sights….

It.

It was one of the most captivating sights.

Get it together, Elsa.

Oh….

She halted in her movements, noticing beyond one of the bends up ahead a thick braid she’d recognize anywhere. She circled the tree in front of her and stepped over a root, seeing Honeymaren in plain sight up ahead on the hill….

She placed a hand on the tree beside her, stopping herself from going any further.

Honeymaren and Ryder.

In an embrace.

Not just a normal embrace. There…. There was something different about this. It was tight. Warm. Comforting. Almost….

Ryder’s grip seemed to tighten around her. Unintentionally, Elsa could overhear their exchange.

“Thank you for talking about it, Honey.”

“Of course, Ry.”

Her voice was so soft. It….

It almost took her back to that first night.

When Honeymaren told her about the spirits.

When they sang together.

But the way she spoke to Ryder….

It was…special, somehow.

Elsa couldn’t quite put her finger on it.

Or why.

Wait, why was she even thinking about this? She….

She shouldn’t even be eavesdropping.

She should go.

She had to go.

Elsa turned around, prepared to head back.

Then she heard the most delicate, sincere declaration from Ryder.

“I don’t know what I’d do without you. I love you so much.”

There was a light pause.

Then a similar tone from Honeymaren.

“I love you, too, Ryder. I’m here. Always.”

Elsa couldn’t help but turn. She watched them just a little longer.

Ryder nuzzled his cheek against Honeymaren’s shoulder. Honeymaren responding by moving one of her hands from around Ryder’s back and onto the nape of his neck, caressing his hairs that caught between her fingers.

It was….

Probably one of the most intimate scenes Elsa had ever seen.

Elsa’s hand went over her heart. She couldn’t stop her face from falling. Taking a moment, she ducked behind the tree. She leaned against it, using it to keep herself steady as she felt her heart pound a little harder.

I can’t go over there now, she thought, I can’t interrupt that…. Them. I didn’t realize they….

Her brows furrowed.

Are they…?

Her eyes darted back and forth.

I thought…

Were they siblings?

Were they friends?

Were they as close as Anna and Elsa were?

Unless they were….

Were they…?

He did call her Honey….

Why would he do that if they weren’t….

Then again, it was her name.

Or…part of her name.

A beautiful part, come to think of it.

Hm….

Honey….

Wait a minute….

Elsa shook her head.

This is ridiculous, she thought again. What does it matter if….?

She paused.

Unless I should ask her?

Would that be rude?

What would I say?

‘Are you and Ryder siblings?’

Who asks that?

‘Is there something going on between you and Ryder?’

But that still sounded so intrusive.

Why would Elsa even need…?

She didn’t.

Need to know.

She didn’t.

It….

It wasn’t any of her business.

She didn’t need to know everything about Honey….

MAREN!

Honeymaren.

Elsa rubbed her temples.

Get it together, she thought again.

She slowly peered from behind the tree, looking up at them.

The embrace ended. Honeymaren rested her forehead against Ryder’s, and he relaxed further, letting out a sigh of relief. She slid her hand from his neck and onto his cheek, which brought Ryder’s eyes back to hers. Maybe she was confirming that Ryder was ok? Was it platonic? Was it romantic?

After a final nod, Honeymaren cautiously pulled back from Ryder. He seemed to let out an exhale and, with a gentle smile on Honeymaren’s lips, she made her way deeper into the woods.

This is my chance, Elsa realized.

Right…?

She should…?

No.

No time for questions.

It was now or never.

She straightened her posture, nodding with determination.

Ok. I’m going to do it.

She quietly followed Honeymaren through the forest, waiting for the appropriate time to approach her. It felt so wrong sneaking behind her, almost as if she were spying. No, that may not have been entirely true….

So what was stopping her from simply walking up to Honeymaren? All she had to do was pick up her pace. Even just call out to her.

‘Oh…Honeymaren! Hi….’

Wouldn’t that be so damn eloquent.

‘Oh, there you are!’

Or was that too eager?

A surprise attack with a snowball?

No, that would be more expected from Anna.

This wasn’t rocket science. It wasn’t like it was difficult to just walk up to someone, especially who was considered a friend. Just because Elsa had little experience with people and even less with friends, let alone one she had gotten as close to as Honeymaren and it was the first person aside from Anna that she didn’t want space from, and she just so happened to love looking into Honeymaren’s eyes….

She was thinking too much about this, wasn’t she?

That’s it. I’m just going to walk up to her.

Where did she go off to, anyway?

Elsa had been so preoccupied with her thoughts she didn’t realize….

Oh….

There she was, in a clearing.

She sat with her back straight; legs crossed; staff in her lap; eyes closed.

She was meditating.

Elsa couldn’t interrupt that.

So she waited.

And watched Honeymaren sit there.

This wasn’t weird at all.

Honeymaren’s eyes opened suddenly. She swung her staff to the side, almost as if she heard someone approaching. Less than a second later, she moved her weapon to her other hand and, within the same breath, leapt to her feet and executed a high jump kick. She spun and moved to the side, dropping her staff. Honeymaren landed on her tiptoes, back arched and fingertips barely touching the ground. Back on her feet, she drew in her arm at an angle with her hand flat. Even without her staff in her possession, she appeared so skilled in using her body itself as a weapon. Or, at the very least, a shield.

Sliding forward, Honeymaren flipped onto her hands in a way Elsa could only describe as a combination of a head spin and spinning kick. Honeymaren’s weight shifted onto a single hand with one leg in front and the other behind, thrusting herself forward to grab her staff. She knelt forward, her staff now an arm’s length away with a tight grasp. Loose strands of hair began to separate themselves from her braid and a fiery determination shone in her eyes, prepared to use her staff as a sword to eliminate her invisible enemy.

Watching this woman was almost like an intricate dance.

One that only Honeymaren knew the choreography to.

With so much fervor and passion.

A focus unlike anything Elsa had noticed before.

She was beautiful.

It.

It was beautiful.

Elsa didn’t realize she had emerged from the shadows until Honeymaren had moved closer, nearly mid-kick just a few inches away.

“Elsa!”

She lost her position and slipped onto her back. Elsa had to cover her mouth in an attempt to hide a giggle. She didn’t mean to laugh; it was a cute slip-up, and so uncharacteristic of Honeymaren.

Especially after what she had just witnessed.

Honeymaren pulled herself off the ground and brushed herself off. “Wh…what are you doing here?”

Not spying on you.

Why was that her first response?

Thank the spirits she didn’t say it out loud.

Instead, she responded in an equally impulsive and only slightly less embarrassing manner.

“What am I doing? Watching you! When…. How…. That…that was incredible, Honeymaren. You were magnifi…I mean, your skills are magnificent! I know you said you were trained to fight, but you didn’t mention being a master warrior.”

Wait, what?

Was that too much?

Showering Honeymaren with all those compliments?

On top of that, displaying such disbelief in her skills?

Why would she say all of that to Honeymaren’s face?

“Thank you…?”

Although her response sounded more like a question than an actual thank you.

Had she felt insulted by Elsa’s outburst?

“I’m just sorry you had to see me like this,” Honeymaren continued.

Elsa blinked. “Like what?”

Honeymaren shrugged. She adjusted her braid, occasionally pulling a few bangs away from her face in between undoing and redoing the strands. She barely made any eye contact, which Elsa attributed to focusing on her hair.

Though Elsa was slightly more focused on how Honeymaren's biceps were highlighted....

"Sweaty...?"

Elsa blinked, Honeymaren's voice bringing her back to reality.

"Or.... I don't know," she said with the faintest chuckle, "you probably never had to deal with this...."

Elsa raised an eyebrow, confused over what exactly Honeymaren was trying to convey.

Was she implying that she was some sweaty, smelly forest girl?

"You mean the way Ryder and Kristoff smell of damp fur...?"

Honeymaren paused, pursing her lips in thought.

"Huh.... Is that why they spend all that time around reindeer?"

"I wonder the same thing," Elsa couldn't help but giggle.

But that....

That wasn't Honeymaren at all.

That was nothing like her.

“I wouldn't have noticed. You smell more like the forest after rainfall in spring."

Wait, what?

Elsa mentally scolded herself.

“IT!”

She pulled in her lips.

“I meant…. It smells more like rainfall.”

Because that sounded so much better.

Not.

“But I do understand,” she attempted to redirect. “Kristoff can be the same way.”

That was a close one.

She moved a strand of hair behind her ear, watching from the corner of her eye as Honeymaren sat down. Elsa hesitated for a moment, wondering if she should follow suit. Would Honeymaren have wanted company, or would it be better to hold off their conversation for a later date?

TIME.

She meant time.

“Do…”

She took a pause.

“Do you still need to train?”

“Probably not. It’s a force of habit, I suppose,” she answered. “I’ve been training every day for years, ever since I can remember. I thought it was for my peoples’ benefit. They…expected this of me. So I kept going. Even if I already trained for the day, I’d come back and do it again. And I’d feel…. Better, in a way. I came to realize that it helps me process my emotions. When I have frustrations; when I need to think; when I’m upset; I come here. It serves a dual purpose. To stop so suddenly now feels….” Honeymaren exhaled. “I don’t know. Like….” She tilted her head up, staring at the sky. “Kind of like a dream. I can look up and see the sky now. The sun. The moon. The clouds…. I didn’t even know those existed. We lived under the mist for so long, cast beneath the darkness….” With another slight shrug of her shoulder, she glanced up at Elsa. “Then you came along. Freed the forest.”

A small smile graced Honeymaren’s lips, but as quickly as it came it faded. Her eyes drifted downwards; arms half-crossed over her knees. “It just feels too good to be true. And if I allow myself to believe this is real…if I stop training…. It’s going to come to an end. And I’d lose you – this – all of this. Everything would be taken away again. So…. Maybe I don’t. Not anymore. But…”

She paused.

“I’d probably train until my last breath if I could.”

That was….

So much more than Elsa was expecting.

It didn’t seem unlike Honeymaren to be open in such a way. She had been accepting and welcoming of Elsa – not to mention Anna and Arendelle, of course! – already.

But there was still such a weight on Honeymaren’s shoulders.

Doing this for over two decades….

Being the person everyone turned to….

Acting as the primary protector….

Not just of the forest but her people….

Preparing to take over for Yelena one day….

There was so much pressure.

Elsa wouldn’t quite liken it to her reign as queen…while similar sentiments they were both completely different.

They were both leaders; trained for years to step into their positions and had assets and skill sets meant to help their people.

But Arendelle had a rich history with many connections and alliances; Northuldra was locked away for years and suffered so much in the past thirty years compared to Arendelle.

How could Elsa remotely think she could compare the two?

There was no comparison.

“I meant today….” she confessed softly.

She could see Honeymaren’s face fall.

Though whether it was disappointment or embarrassment, Elsa couldn’t say.

“Oh….”

Elsa bit her bottom lip.

She had to choose her words carefully, especially now.

She wouldn’t want to insinuate anything.

Let alone hurt Honeymaren.

Especially after hearing all that….

She couldn’t have been more grateful to her.

It meant their friendship was important to her.

That she trusted Elsa.

It meant more than she realized.

“But thank you…. For telling me all of that.”

She cautiously took a seat next to Honeymaren, taking another moment to contemplate.

It almost felt wrong to ask now….

Was it a bad time?

Or would it somehow lighten the mood?

Unless it was out of pure selfishness.

But if she didn’t ask now….

“May I ask you something?”

Or she could just blurt it out.

“Of course,” Honeymaren nodded.

Elsa pulled in her lips.

Here went nothing.

“You and Ryder…. What is the story?”

The faintest huff escaped Honeymaren; an almost as-a-matter-of-factly response. “We lost a lot of good people in the war. We all suffered together; though Ryder and me especially. We were both young when we lost our parents to a horrible battle. Yelena would say she took pity on us…. I think it was sympathy. She lost her partner as well. But she raised us as her own. You could say that Ryder and I were attached at the hip. It was always the two of us. We did everything together. We learned. We suffered. We grew. We….”

She let out a sigh. “There’s no one of us without the other. I’m the only family he really knows. That he even remembers. It’s me and him, through thick and thin. We know everything about each other.”

It was almost like looking at a reflection of Anna and Elsa. The two of them didn’t do everything together; and Elsa continued to grieve the years the two of them lost together. But when they were younger…how they were now….

There was hardly a thing they didn’t do together as children. Where one went, the other followed. Anna, especially. Anna would always find a way to be with Elsa. Yes, there were things that Elsa was still unlearning. But she and Anna had come so far in repairing their relationship. She couldn’t imagine her life without her sister. And while Elsa wouldn’t go so far as to say there was nothing she’d do without Anna – that much was obvious – she would do anything and everything for her. Anna was her other half. The bond that they had…the bond that Ryder and Honeymaren seemed to share…it was special.

No wonder they appeared so intimate earlier.

“It’s funny, though,” Honeymaren continued with a giggle, “people keep asking when we’re going to get together. They think because that we’re the only descendants left of our leading families, we should be promised to each other by now.”

Promised as in….

Married…?

Wait….

WHAT?

Elsa could almost feel ice forming and shattering beneath her.

She had to do a double take to be certain nothing had reacted.

Phew.

Hopefully Honeymaren didn’t notice.

“Is…”

Elsa’s face heated while she fiddled with her hair.

How red was her face right now?

“Is that something you’d want…?”

Honeymaren snorted. A heavy huff escaped her, turning into a grunt and then what could only be described as a gagging sound. “Married? To Ryder? Spirits, no! He’s like my kid brother! I don’t know how anyone could think of him that way.”

Thank the spirits!

Right…?

It was a relief.

That Honeymaren and Ryder were….

But then….

Why…?

Another other person would have laughed in agreement.

So why was Elsa’s first response…?

It wasn’t like she….

“I don’t know why people even keep asking,” Honeymaren rolled her eyes. “They know I don’t look at any man like that.”

Elsa furrowed her brows.

“You, either?”

Honeymaren stared.

Did she have to look at her like that?

Like she was some kind of….

Anomaly?

Elsa had always known that much was true.

She never equated it to….

Well….

This.

“I guess I just wasn’t sure if it was because I was always a busy queen,” Elsa admitted. “Or maybe it was my powers. I always knew my magic made me different…. Maybe this was part of that.”

She could have sworn she saw a soft smile come from Honeymaren.

But that couldn’t have been right.

She had to have been imagining things.

“You are magical. And you are very special,” Honeymaren complimented. “But not because of this. This doesn’t make you any different. Or alone.”

Honeymaren leaned back. “Meanwhile I’ve just been hoping to find the right person for me. She just…. Hasn’t shown herself yet.”

Elsa pursed her lips. “You almost sound like Anna,” she mused.

Not quite the same way but….

Anna was always a hopeless romantic.

She just…at her core, she seemed to love the idea of love.

Even when they were playing as kids, many of their tales would end the same.

“And they all get married!” Anna would cheer.

Elsa would laugh; but she didn’t think that had to happen every time.

“Anna, kissing won’t save the forest!”

“I never understood any of it,” Elsa admitted. “Maybe it was because of my powers…. Because I could never get close to anyone…. For so long I had to keep everyone I loved at a distance. What was the point of falling in love if all I’d ever do is hurt them? But then, even when I’d read it in books, it still didn’t make sense to me. The grand gestures…the declarations…the fantasies…. None of it appealed to me.”

She paused in thought.

“Maybe that was why I was so doubtful of her ‘relationship’ with Hans. She only knew him for a few hours and yet she had this extravagant wedding and life planned out with him…. I didn’t know how she could fall in love so quickly….”

She shook her head.

“He did turn out to be a traitor anyway…. And it was the first time in forever the gates had opened…. I suppose I had some right to be doubtful….”

Though things were different now.

Anna had Kristoff.

He was perfect for her.

Beyond perfect, as a matter of fact.

He loved and accepted Anna unconditionally for everything that she was.

He understood Anna’s relationship with Elsa.

What her kingdom and duty meant to her.

He balanced her out in a way no one else ever could.

While Anna had this impulsive, uncontrollable energy – Fiestypants, as Kristoff would call her – Kristoff was calm and level-headed.

She was extroverted; social; warm.

Kristoff was introverted; awkward; standoffish at times.

There was….

Never any question.

Anna and Kristoff had a wonderful, happy, bright, and beautiful future together.

And while Elsa had come to love Kristoff like a brother….

Come to think of it, she would gladly call him her brother….

It still made little sense to her.

How Anna could look at him like that.

How Anna could have ever looked at any man like that.

“Anna did try to set me up a few times. She was never forceful but…. She always seemed to have this idealistic future for us. A puzzle where I could never fully fit the pieces. And while not quite a law…. I could tell people were wondering. Anna was always more than ready for love. For marriage. For a family. I was not. Marriage is a common way to unite kingdoms; to keep peace; to better secure prosperity. I never wanted that. Even if I wouldn’t have to marry a prince specifically…. Nothing ever appealed to me. No one from any other kingdom or village…. Not even anyone in Arendelle….”

Maybe a part of Elsa did abdicate for selfish reasons. She had so many expectations placed upon her, even before people discovered her powers. Marriage…men…it was almost like it was another thing expected of her. That, sooner or later, she should consider someone.

Or, worse, have to.

Even so, her reasoning went beyond that.

“Anna is such a good queen. She could accomplish more than I ever did. And Anna…she’s a queen of the people. She understands them. What they need. How they feel. She can communicate with them. She can provide for them. She can do things for them that no one else could. I could do all the research I wanted; learn anything and everything from books. But knowledge can only take you so far. Compassion; openness; experience; those are the things that will make a difference. That is where Arendelle will flourish. With Anna.”

“But more than that…. People trust her. As much as I would like to believe people had faith in me as well; that there was some good I did for Arendelle…. They knew what I was capable of. Generations of distrust in magic don’t disappear overnight. Or even in a few years. My grandfather left his mark that way; and I don’t doubt that there are people who still believe in him. Who would choose his iron fist and bloodshed over myself. Or Anna. I think that was one of my father’s deepest fears; that people would look at me the way my grandfather might. At best, my magic could be a party trick. Toys created for children. Fireworks in the night sky. Christmas trees in the winter. A skating rink on a hot summer day. Beautiful ice sculptures. At its worst…. It was dangerous. I was dangerous. A cold cloud hovering over Arendelle. Declining temperatures. Isolation from the outside world. Powerful storms. Deadly conditions. Eternal winter. A curse like that is not erased. Forgiven, perhaps; but never forgotten. Until the spirits…Ahtohollan…. I thought when I ran from Arendelle that that was the pique of my magic. It wasn’t until then, and when that tidal wave nearly wiped Arendelle, I had access to my powers in a way I never did before. I never knew what I was truly capable of until then. And how much I could help people.”

She ran her fingers across the grass beneath her. There was a sudden prick to one of her tips. Elsa flinched and pulled her hand back in surprise. She shifted her gaze, seeing it was from the thorn of a nearby rose.

Huh…where did you come from?

Elsa moved her hand, light flakes fluttering from it. Not quite involuntary and certainly not from fear. Maybe it was her magic protecting her. A faint frost glistened over the stem and thorns, allowing Elsa to pick the flower from its place without pain. With her free hand she delicately stroked the petals.

“Anna was the first person who ever believed in me. Who saw genuine beauty in my magic. Even in the darkest of moments, she never thought the worst. To her, there was always good in it. Good in me. She never doubted or questioned because she loves me so much. But regardless of that…sometimes I wonder if she fully understands. To have this kind of power. To fight for control. To have this simultaneous burden and gift. To even just feel it pulsing through every part of me. And yet….”

Elsa couldn’t help but let out a chuckle. “Somehow she’s always able to name what I’m feeling before I can.”

The color on the rose shifted. Elsa could see her shadow in a way she hadn’t before. Time was moving.

Crap….

How long has it been?

How….

When….

Shi…

How long had she been blabbing for?

To Honeymaren??

Elsa clenched her jaw.

“What time is it…? I’m so sorry…. Here I am going on and on…. I didn’t realize…. You have somewhere else to be, don’t you? You…. You should go…. I should go…. I didn’t mean to….”

Honeymaren laughed lightly. “It’s fine…. You’re fine….”

Such a soft laugh….

Almost like a melody….

Like that lullaby….

And yet….

Her voice faded.

Like she was about to say more.

Was there more?

Did she want to say more?

She didn’t know how to respond, did she?

This….

This wasn’t Elsa.

She didn’t….

She never….

How could she open up so much to someone?

Even with Anna….

Every once in a while, there was still a struggle.

She had to fight the urge to conceal.

Her first instinct was still to shut people out.

To shut Anna out.

Sure, Elsa was improving, but….

Somehow….

With Honeymaren….

“You are right, though.”

“Hm?”

Elsa blinked.

“About what?”

“About Anna,” Honeymaren said. “How free-spirited and trusting she is. Anna sees the best in people. The best in you. She would never willingly think anything else. Anna’s an open book. She’s warm. Welcoming. Caring. Forgiving. Loving. She has nothing to hide from anyone. Maybe she never did. Anna’s had her whole life to get to know herself. She has no secrets. She has few trepidations. She would probably give everyone everything if it were possible.”

That was true.

No one could have described Anna any better.

Anna was full of light and love.

And she brought that to everyone around her.

The world was a better place simply because Anna existed.

How fortunate Elsa was to have a sister like that.

And how proud she was of her for that.

“But you….”

Hm…?

There was this….

Change in Honeymaren’s voice.

Elsa couldn’t quite describe it.

But it was intriguing.

Hypnotizing, even.

Raising an eyebrow, Elsa tilted her head in her friend’s direction.

“What about me…?”

She had no idea where that tone came from.

It wasn’t like any Elsa had used before.

It was….

Breathy…?

Mischievous…?

Curious….

But….

Something else.

Her hair wavered when she moved her head. A few strands flew in front of her face, not quite out of place but still an abnormal occurrence.

Within moments, Honeymaren gently lifted her hand, brushing the pieces away. Elsa barely felt the woman’s fingers graze her forehead. She almost wouldn’t know Honeymaren did anything if she hadn’t seen. There was almost this heat teasing Elsa. It wasn’t uncomfortable. It was….

Inviting.

Something she rarely felt with her magic.

She was so accustomed to the cold that anything else, even in the summer….

But this….

What was this?

“You have layers hidden in layers. You’re still blooming; like this rose. Your inner self had to hide because of the shame and guilt you carried for so long. Running is second nature. Seclusion is natural. These are what you grew up with. How could you know yourself when you could never be yourself. You said there’s both beauty and danger in your magic. And that may be true; a rose has its thorns. But perhaps you weren’t ready to know your true self because she was too dangerous.”

She had no idea.

And with access to her magic in a way she never did before….

This connection to nature and the other spirits….

So much strength buried within her Elsa would have never expected….

If she had the capacity to combine her powers with Nokk….

To create the kind of shield that she had….

To protect Arendelle beyond her wildest dreams….

What was on the other end of the spectrum?

What else was she capable of?

What else could she do?

“Maybe she still is a little too dangerous,” Elsa couldn’t help but think out loud.

There was a pause.