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buckyownsmylife · 3 years

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Mine - Steve Rogers smut

The one where Steve used to be your sugar daddy, and now you found out he was someone's actual daddy.

Warnings: ex!Steve, sugar daddy!Steve, single parent!Steve, mentions of a divorce, smut, mentions of infidelity (reader wasn’t the one being cheated on), daddy kink, ceo!Steve, slight size kink, anal play, fingering, p in v, name-calling, dirty talk, possessiveness, jealousy, slight degradation, subspace, unprotected risky sex, breeding kink

Word count: 4.6k

A/N: this idea came from a request and honestly, it was just lovely to write it. I really got into this universe and I’m having a hard time abandoning it, so as always if you have any scenarios you’d like me to write about it, send me your ideas and I’ll write them when I can!

Y/N’s P.O.V.

Shampoo, conditioner… Alright, next isle. What do I need from here?

I was so immersed in the domestic task of choosing my groceries that I barely saw where I was going. Really, it was only a matter of time until I hit someone and went down - which happened only five minutes later.

“Oh, I’m so sorry,” I scrambled to make it right, knowing how aggressive some people can be, even over something so stupid as this. “I didn’t see where I was going, it was my fault…”

But my words died out the second that I saw who it was that I had hit, the man still standing, offering me a firm hand to help me get up from the floor.

“Steve.” The name fell out of my lips instinctively, and it made the both of us flinch as I finally stood on my own two feet in front of him - not that it made that much of a difference. He always towered over almost everyone, anyway.

“Steve, hm… Hi,” I repeated his name, trying to make it sound normal, even though in the three years I’d been with him, I’d never addressed him as such. It was clear that he was thinking the same, his eyes darting between mine with a peculiar glint of reminiscence in them.

“Hi,” he greeted, voice softer than I expected it to be. He still hadn’t let go of my hand, and once my eyes fell on where we were both connected, he seemed to realize it, immediately letting it drop.

I tried to ignore the pang of sadness his reaction provoked in me.

“How have you been?” He tried to move past the awkward moment as I tried to wipe my sweaty hand as inconspicuously as possible. God, I hated this.

I’d never been a fan of small talk, but small talk with an ex that wasn’t really an ex because he used to pay you to be with him? Yeah, this wasn’t exactly top of my list of favorite things to do on a Friday night.

“I’ve been fine… Finished school, now I’m working for this little publishing house. Nothing major, but it makes me happy.” His eyes lit up at that, making a thousand little butterflies set flight in my stomach, and I averted my gaze as I cleared my throat to give me something else to focus on.

“That’s all I ever wanted for you.” I bit my lip to stop myself from doing something embarrassing, like bursting into tears in the middle of a supermarket. I didn’t know how to answer to that, so I decided to change the subject.

“You changed your hair.” Steve looked up as if he could see his own luscious strands, perfectly gelled back into the elegant look a CEO was expected to have. He seemed about to comment on the subject when a voice interrupted us.

“Daddy, daddy!” I saw the scene develop in slow motion, like a movie someone wanted me to pay particular attention to. The little boy - a perfect copy of Steve, or at least the Steve I met, with shorter, blonder hair, clean face - ran up to the man before me, who grimaced before he crouched to catch the boy in his arms.

“Hey, buddy.” He rubbed the boy’s back, but his eyes were fixed on me while my gaze was stuck on the kid. He had to be at least four years old. Which meant when Steve met me, he had already been born.

Another figure approached, this one tall enough to cast a shadow on our paused conversation. “Sorry, I couldn’t contain him anymore. He’s hyped on sugar.” The brunette man gave an apologetic smile to Steve, who sighed.

“You’re the one who fed him donuts all day.” But the guy only shrugged, no guilt in his features. “Huh, Y/N, this is Bucky, my childhood best friend.” But I knew who he was. I knew all about him because I knew all of Steve’s secrets - or so I thought.

Because I didn’t know this. I didn’t know he cheated on someone with me.

Bucky seemed to feel the weight of the tension between us because he looked from Steve to me before reaching to take the boy again. “Let’s go over here, bud. I think I saw a claw machine.”

I was still so shocked that as the two of them left, I could only blink at Steve, who seemed to be waiting some sort of reaction from me.

“After his mother left me, I didn’t really have the time to worry about things like getting a haircut,” he tried to joke when he got tired of waiting, maybe hoping to ease the mood.

“It’s fine.” I cleared my throat again, finally snapping out of it as I searched for my cart again. “Uh, you look great. I should go now.” I was about to turn around and go back in the direction I’d come from when his hand seized my wrist.

“Wait,” he asked, making me freeze. “I- God, let me just…”

“It’s fine,” I interrupted, giving him what I hoped would translate as a polite smile, trying to pass it off as if what I said was true. “You don’t owe me an explanation.” But even as I said it, I could feel my anxiety through the roof, my need to sit down and analyze this almost overbearing.

And still, Steve’s grip kept me in place, his tone serious as he asked me, “So why do I feel like I do?” I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding, a shaky, nervous breath. I tried to smile, brushing my hair out of my face while he continued, “Look, Y/N… You still affect me greatly.”

He didn’t need to say it, his look was enough to make me aware that he knew I could say the same about you. “I don’t want you to think less of me.” Weirdly, I didn’t.

But I never got the chance to say it. Out of the corner of our eyes, we caught the familiar figures of his friend and his son approaching, and so he let me go, a sigh as he buried his hands in his pockets and commented, “I wish we had more time to catch up.”

I watched him carefully as I thought about my next move. I could let this go. I could say ‘yeah, but it was nice seeing you’, turn around and go back to my ordinary life. But now that I was here, in front of him, I didn’t want to go back to missing his presence in my life.

“Alright, I’m not gonna lie.” My eyes narrowed but I kept a teasing smile on my lips so he knew I wasn’t actually against the idea. “This sounds like one of your lines to get me to meet you at a coffee shop.”

The half-smile he opened up was at the same time boyish and seductive. “How about a restaurant?”

Jokingly huffing, I rolled my eyes as I complained, “Steeeeve!”

We both paused. The tone sounded too much like the one I employed when I was being bratty. But back then, I had never addressed him as anything other than daddy. As his actual child approached with the nickname on his lips, I bit my lip while watching him once again lean down to pick the little boy up.

“I’ll call you.” The look he sent me had shivers running down my spine, making me aware that as much as it was a promise, it might offer me all of the consequences of a threat.

Steve’s P.O.V.

She didn’t leave my mind for a single second ever since that night. I was eager to see her again - desperate for it, even. I knew there was so much I needed to tell her, stuff she deserved to know but I couldn’t explain back then.

I also missed her terribly. There hadn’t been a single day since I broke it all off that I hadn’t wondered how she was, if she was okay. I was glad she had managed to graduate and get her life together, but selfishly, I found myself wishing for the days when she still depended on me.

To my relief, she didn’t change her mind when I actually called to settle on a date, taking advantage of Bucky’s visit to leave Luke with him. She didn’t sound particularly excited about it, but I guess that much was understandable. In many ways, I was sort of an ex, and we both knew there were too many uncomfortable questions hovering over our heads to be able to ignore it when we were alone together.

So I was grateful when she took the first step and asked me, her eyes settled on her glass of wine. “Was it because of me?” We hadn’t spoken about the divorce ever since I picked her up, admiring the way she looked in the dark green dress, her legs teasing me from the slit on the side, and still I knew exactly what she was referring to.

I took a sip of my own glass of wine to find the courage to face this conversation, not because the subject hurt me, but because I was so desperate for one particular outcome. So I knew I had to play this carefully.

“No,” I admitted, connecting my eyes to hers so she could see the honesty in them. “My relationship was damaged enough already. You weren’t the reason for my divorce.”

Her shoulders relaxed after my initial explanation. I watched her breathe deeply after it, taking it in, accepting the truth deep in her bones. It felt good to let it out. It made me hopeful for the both of us.

But if I truly wanted this to end up the way I hoped, I knew I had to keep being honest, even though it was hard. “She was the reason why I broke it off with you, though.”

Her eyes widened at my confession, but other than surprise, I couldn’t really tell what other emotions she was feeling at that moment. So I kept opening my heart to her, in the hopes it’d make her see how much I missed our time together.

“I regret it ever since.” Our gazes remained locked for a significant moment before it all felt too real and too heavy and she averted her eyes, looking away before settling on the wine in front of her once more.

I wish I could just lean over and kiss her, worship her body the way I was able to. For all the happiness Luke brought to my life, I’d never forgive Natalie for making me leave Y/N because even if I had decided to give my marriage another chance back then, I already knew it was doomed to fail.

I knew it because I knew I was in love with the girl sitting in front of me.

I wondered if she still tasted the same. My gaze traveled down her body, as far as I could see considering the table between us, taking advantage of the pause in the conversation to drink in every delicious inch of her.

I was desperate to know. And I was not a man used to feeling desperate. So I adjusted myself on my seat, trying to keep myself comfortable despite the quickly hardening member between my legs, licking my lips before commenting, “I have to say… I’m finding incredibly difficult to be near you right now.”

“Why?” She quickly questioned, seizing the opportunity I presented to escape the heavy moment we had inadvertently fallen into. But she didn’t realize it was a trap - not until I opened the smirk I was trying to hide.

“Because I can’t help but think of all the times I’ve had you naked underneath me.” It was a calculated move, even though there was some risk to it. As a business man, I knew there was risk behind every valuable action.

And no action was as valuable as getting her back to me. When she averted her gaze and giggled, clearly flustered by my comment, I knew I’d managed to hit the jackpot and the overwhelming feeling of relief had me inhaling deeply.

“You always enjoyed my teasing, huh?” I pressed on, leaning over the table so I could speak lower and still have her listen to what I was saying. “Don’t you want me to ravish you right here, right now, baby? Show everyone in this restaurant who owns you?”

She was breathing heavily now, eyes sparkling with excitement and lust - I had no doubt that I looked the same. The silence now was just as powerful, but much more exciting as I waited for her move now.

“Take me home.” It finally came. “Right now.” A victorious smile took over my face as I stood up and reached for her hand, throwing some money on the table to cover for whatever expenses we had made.

“I love that you’re still as impatient for me as I am for you, princess.”

Y/N’s P.O.V.

He brushed the hair away from my face as he cradled it with his huge palms, making me breathe hard just by the sheer reminder of how big everything about him was. “I need you to be sure,” he spoke against my lips, warm breath raising chills all over me. “I need to know that you truly want this.”

And I did. I truly, honestly, did. He made me feel things that I had never felt with anyone before or after I was with him and I wanted another taste - even if it was the last one I’d ever have.

“I want this,” I assured him, and that was all there was to it. He had to bend down to kiss me and I always found that endearing, but right then, after so many years without his taste on my lips, hunger was quickly taking control of the sweeter part of me. “I want you.”

His hands travels down my back until they reached my ass, but just palming it over my dress wasn’t enough for Steve. Quickly, they fell even lower, until he was able to hold the back of my thighs and pull me up to wrap my legs around his body.

It always amazed me how he was able to do this. Now that he had me in his arms, he held me by my ass, lips never separating from mine as he tried to make his way into my apartment without having to open his eyes.

“I think this would be easier if you let me walk,” I giggled, hiding my face in the crook of his neck as he groaned.

“All this effort to keep kissing you and you leave me hanging just to mock me?” More laughter escaped from me, a warm feeling in my chest at the realization that being with him was just as comfortable. We could still joke around while making out. In some ways, it was like nothing had changed at all.

When he deposited me on the floor again, we were by my bed now. For a second, Steve just stood there, looking me up and down, towering over me while I waited with bated breath.

“What do you call me, sweetheart?” I hadn’t heard that question in so long, it elicited shivers down my spine, my mouth falling open in a quiet gasp as he took my face in between his hands again.

“Daddy,” I was quick to answer, knowing Steve was not a patient manl. After all the time we spent apart, I could only imagine how little control he would have now that he was so close to fucking me again.

Steve nodded, tongue running over his lower lip before he leaned over me to kiss me once more. This time, he slipped his tongue inside of my mouth, taking control of our movements sensuously as I melted in his arms.

“Daddy wants to punish you, baby.” Those were the first words he spoke to me after we parted, in need of some oxygen despite our desires. Before I could ask for clarification, he provided it for me, “I know you didn’t do anything wrong, but I need this.”

“I promise I’ll make it feel good for the both of us.” It was a vow he didn’t need to voice. I believed it wholeheartedly. And I understood his request. He needed to release the angst of our separation, the overwhelming excitement of our encounter.

I could grant him that. With a nod, I stood on my tiptoes to deposit a kiss on his lips, sealing the deal. “Don’t let me hurt you, okay?” He pleaded, thumbs brushing over my cheekbones, but I could only smile.

“I want it to.” The most predatory smirk slowly spread over Steve’s lips, his eyes sparkling that dangerous dark glint that had me panting in anticipation.

“I’d forgotten how truly perfect for me you are.” The comment would have hurt if I had been granted any time to dwell on it, but Steve would never allow me that. No, he wanted to fuck me stupid, make me forget every single scar he’d ever given me.

And I was hungry for that.

In a quick move, with the ease of someone with years of practice, he got me rid of my dress and bent me over the bed, offering my ass to himself.

“God, you’re too sexy.” I was wet already, almost enough to drip down my thighs, so it wasn’t surprising that he shoved two fingers at once, setting a bruising pace right against my sweet spot.

I couldn’t believe after all this years he could still find it without any effort.

He pulled those digits off of me all of a sudden, leaving me empty, making me whine. His next comment explained me why. “So fucking sweet,” he moaned around his fingers and just the thought of it had me clenching around nothing, desperate to be stretched again.

He seemed to read my mind because he quickly returned to my pussy - with just one finger this time, his longest one, and it was in and out quickly.

The second I felt that same digit push against my puckered hole, I knew why. He also slipped his cock into me, penetrating me twice at the same time and it was all so debauched it had me moaning loudly to my empty room.

“You won’t be able to walk when I’m done with you,” Steve warned once he was knuckle deep and bottomed out inside of me, free hand pulling me by my neck so he could whisper against the shell of my ear. “And you know why?”

He waited for me to answer, but all I could do was nod, heart beating madly against my chest, breath coming out of my open mouth. All of my senses seemed reduced to one thing and one thing only: the feeling of Steve’s cock stretching me out, filling me up.

“Because I want you to depend on me again.” The words had me gasping, especially since he paired them with his first thrust - a harsh thrust - and started to fuck me nice and deep and hard. “I want you to depend on me for everything.”

This shouldn’t make me so wet, should it? I prided myself on being self-sufficient, in the sense that I was able to work for everything I wanted in life - even when I needed to become a sugar baby to put myself through college. That was my decision. I could have stopped at any time and chosen another way to do that, and once Steve left my life, that’s precisely what I did.

But there was something to be said about the idea of not having to worry about anything. I didn’t feel guilty that I relished in it, in knowing this strong, handsome man wanted to provide me with everything I needed in life and make every decision for me, taking away all of the difficulties I could ever face.

It was a nice fantasy, and I could allow the both of us that reprieve.

Steve’s P.O.V.

“I want to own you,” I growled, possessiveness getting even more out of hand at her answering moan. It was obvious that the idea got her off and although we’d need to talk about how much truth there was in what I was saying, for the moment this was more than enough. Just knowing that the idea didn’t repulse her - that in some degree, she still wanted to be completely mine - was all I needed to feel the ambers of desire grow inside of me.

“Tell me, princess…” I panted over her, slowing my movements to hear her whine and witness the way she tried to fuck herself back against me, like she was truly desperate for my cock. “Did anyone touch what was mine?”

She didn’t answer me, and that was really everything I needed to know. Of course, I didn’t blame her for dating after spending so much time apart, but I also couldn’t help the pang of jealousy, my mind racing as images of her underneath someone else threatened to break me.

“Pathetic little slut,” I snarled, covering her throat with my hand as I resumed my forceful thrusts. “Spreading your legs to whomever can fill you… You just need to cum, don’t you? It doesn’t even matter if the person is any good at it, you just can’t help yourself.”

Her thighs trembled on each side of my body, denouncing her orgasm. I pulled her back to cover her mouth with mine, swallowing her screams so I could feed on them as we shared a kiss.

“No one can fuck you this good, baby.” It was a statement born more out of insecurity than the need to remind her of that, so the fact that she immediately began to nod, small little sounds of praise falling from her lips helped me find my confidence again. “No one understand what you need, isn’t that right?”

“Just you, daddy,” she was quick to answer. “Only you can make me cum. Please make me cum again, I want to drench your dick in my cum, daddy.”

“Holy fuck,” I cursed, having forgotten how nasty she could get when she fell deep into subspace, right when her cunt began clenching around me again. “No one feels this good, fuck,” I realized, hips stuttering for a second as I tried to control myself. “You’re always so good and tight.”

Her moans were driving me fucking insane. I gripped the meat of her ass to pull her back to me, knowing I was so fucking close to drive us both over that edge.

“Yes, princess,” I groaned when her moans became more high-pitched. “Scream for me, c’mon.” She came with a desperate cry that had me tempting to spill inside of her, but before I could do that, I had to ask, “Can I cum inside of you?”

Her pause warned me of what I already anticipated. She wasn’t on any birth control and the knowledge had me throbbing inside of her, frenzied in my desire to fill her up.

“Do it.” Her words were barely over a whisper, but there wasn’t any hesitancy on them. “Cum inside me.” A groan escaped my chest upon hearing her say that, so I had to hear it again.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

“Beg me for it,” he ordered, massaging my ass with those huge palms of his. He’d never done this before - we had never done this before. Risky sex wasn’t a part of the deal, and now I knew why.

“P-put a baby in me,” I voiced my deepest desire, the one I had hidden in the safe box where I kept our memories for so long. “Make me a mom, daddy. Please.”

The growl he let out at my addition was barely even human, as was the way he fucked me like this was his last hour on Earth and the last pussy he’d ever get to fuck

“Thank me for it, baby,” was his last command, right before his hips lost their rhythm and he gave me what I’d been asking for.

“Yes, thank you, daddy!” I screamed, the feeling of his warmth eliciting another small high for me, leaving me breathless. “Thank you,” I repeated, fingers at last relaxing to let go of the duvet I’d been gripping.

Sleep was welcoming me into its familiar arms with surprising speed, right as another pair set their grip around my body, pulling me into a hard yet gentle chest.

I guess you never really stop loving someone, do you?

Steve’s P.O.V.

I woke up startled after what felt like merely minutes, the absence of her weight resting over me heavy in all of the emptiness it left behind.

“Princess?” My hands reached over the spot by my side. She wasn’t there. I sat up on the bed in an instant, eager to find her near me. She couldn’t have left me alone in her apartment, could she? She knows better than that. She knows I’d wait for her to get back, however long that might be.

I found her in the kitchen, sitting in one of the counters with a glass of water in her hands and I wouldn’t have found the image so terrifying if it weren’t for two things.

She wasn’t wearing my shirt, which meant she had consciously decided to choose something to wear and didn’t want that something to be mine.

And her eyes were very clearly red when she raised her gaze to meet mine.

And still, I asked, “Why did you leave?”, standing by the threshold as I stared back at her, terrified of taking a step closer and scaring her away. When she averted her gaze, I already knew I wouldn’t like her answer.

“I can’t be the one being left again.” My heart shattered into a million pieces at her confession, much like it had done that evening so many moons ago when I closed the door behind me and walked out of her life, knowing I’d never be able to keep her off my mind.

My legs acted on their own accord, taking me closer to her so I could cradle her face, offer her some comfort. “Oh, sweetheart, no,” I whispered, running my thumb over her cheekbone before kissing her for an instant, hoping in that instant she’d come to understand how much she meant to me. “I don’t want to leave you again. I’m not going to,” I assured her before adding quietly, “not unless you ask me to.”

She accepted my proximity for a little bit before gently pushing me away. The second her skin wasn’t near mine, I felt cold and alone, despite her being right there.

“We don’t even know each other anymore, Steve.” She continued to avoid my eyes. “It’s been years.” It was the truth, even though it hurt me to admit it. But…

“I don’t care,” I stated, crossing the distance she had placed between us. “Please, let me make this right,” I begged, reaching out for her once more. “Let’s go on another date, whatever you need.”

Pressing kisses to her shoulder, I hugged her to me, unwilling to part from her warmth. “I promise this time will be different,” I assured her. “It’ll be so much better.”

Her fingers ran down my chest before she accepted my hug, making me shiver in excitement. “I want to date you, baby,” I repeated, voice a bit mumbled from keeping my lips pressed against her skin. “Just… come back to bed, okay? Let me wake up with you in my arms tomorrow, and from then on, we can figure it out.”

I pulled away to look into her eyes and she stared back into mine. I held my breath in anticipation, nervously waiting for any reaction until finally, she nodded.

“Okay.”

#my fics #steve rogers smut #steve roger #smut #sugar daddy au #single father au #ceo au #ex au #my requests #steve rogers request #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers reader insert #steve rogers reader inserts

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ssahotchdad · 2 years

Text

The Things We Do ...

... while holding hands

Chapter 2 of The Things We Do ...

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Emily Prentiss

Wordcount: 5.7k

Read on Archive of Our Own or below the cut!

LEAD.

If there was something Aaron Hotchner took great pride in, it was to have the unit consisting of the best profilers. While he could only hope that meant they were a team good at solving other issues in their everyday lives too, he could confirm they were not. Reading maps just so happened to be one of the things his team could be a lot better at. Getting to the right locations at the right time also fell into the category of things the agents of the Behavioural Analysis Unit could improve on, something he got confirmed once again as he stood by the gazebo in the park, patiently waiting for Emily Prentiss to show up.

“Daddy, when is Emily coming?” Jack asked his father, tilting his head all the way back as he looked at the older Hotchner, noticing how the expression had changed on his face. “Your eyebrows are funny.”

Without even realising it, Aaron’s expression had changed to Hotch, the expression his team was so used to seeing. The very expression his young son was not used to seeing on his father’s face. “Sorry, buddy, I just thought I saw Emily.” He sighed, crouching next to his son, ruffling the young boy’s hair. “How about I give her a call, and check up on where she is? She promised she’d be here for our picnic, and we both know she couldn’t ever stand us up.”

“We’re her favourites!” Jack cheered as a wide, toothy smile spread on his face, causing Aaron to melt. However, he didn’t fail to notice how the boy’s gaze wavered, focusing on something in the distance behind his back. Turning, Aaron couldn’t help but smile as he spotted her walking towards them. “Can I run and meet her?”

“Of course, buddy.” Aaron smiled, watching as his son raced past him, excitedly shouting her name as he threw himself at her. Thankfully, Emily was prepared, being able to keep her balance and catch the boy, a happy, contagious laughter escaping her lips as she hugged him close. Without having complete control of himself, Aaron found himself meeting them halfway, snaking an arm around her waist as he pulled her close. “Hi.” He murmured, pressing his lips gently against hers.

“Hello there.” She chuckled, looking down at Jack as she ruffled the boy’s hair; he was still holding her in his own embrace, a wicked grin on his lips. Oh boy, Aaron was in it with this one – Jack had no intentions of letting his father win the fight when it came to getting Emily’s sole attention. “I am sorry I’m late. I had to distract Garcia before showing up.”

Aaron chuckled, nodding slightly. “I understand. We both do, don’t we Jack?” He asked, looking down too as he watched the boy nod eagerly. “We set up in the shade over there, let’s go. Jack’s been complaining about being hungry for the last fifteen minutes.” Aaron grinned cheekily, barely even being given a head’s up as the boy decided to run back to their picnic basket, making sure to stomp heavily on his father’s foot in the process. However, he couldn’t help but chuckle again, taking Emily’s hand in his, giving it a light squeeze as he walked ahead, gently tugging her along. “What did you tell Garcia?”

“Just that I was going out with these two guys I really care about.” Emily shrugged, a small smirk playing on her lips, stifling a laugh as he tugged on her hand, pulling her into his arms as they sat down. “And we all know that wasn’t a lie.”

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REASSURANCE.

Aaron blamed himself for letting his guard down and having been attacked by George Foyet within the comfort of his own home. Emily blamed herself for having caved to Penelope’s constant push for wanting to go out for a friday night drink, and then staying the night at the technical analyst’s place. Both of them knew they shouldn’t blame themselves, yet they did anyway. The worst part of it? Definitely the way Emily’s gut told her something was wrong, but after being constantly reassured by Penelope that everything was fine, the agent had pushed her worries away, completely unaware of how Aaron’s blood was soaking up the floorboards of their apartment.

When he didn’t show up for work, she immediately knew something was wrong. Aaron Hotchner did not avoid coming in to work for no reason; she had witnessed him stumbling into his office with a fever, adamant about being no good to anyone at home, when he did his best work in the office. It took her three hours to convince him he wasn’t doing anyone any good either, by not getting the rest he needed.

It wasn’t until hours later, as they sat in a hospital waiting room, that the awful truth began to dawn upon Emily. Derek placed a hand on her back, his palm right between her shoulder blades, as he leaned over to tell her everything was going to be fine, that Aaron was a fighter. Or, at least that’s what she assumed he was telling her, because quite frankly, Emily Prentiss had succumbed to her own worries and thoughts a long time ago, his words sounding more like a low buzz than actual words.

“Emily, they’re trying to speak with you.” Derek finally broke through to her, her head snapping up as she looked right into the face of a nurse. She was smiling apologetically down at Emily; this wasn’t the first time she had witnessed people coping with trauma by blocking out the world around them. Though no member of the team actually spoke, they all accepted that it was Emily who went with the nurse, that Emily was the first one to see Aaron. David took the nurse aside, getting the most important bits of information,

“Go be with him. I’ll call Haley, you don’t need to worry about that.” The older agent nodded, a hand on her shoulder as he gave it a light squeeze. He was tempted to give her a hug, reassure her that Aaron had survived worse – but he knew there was no point, Emily wouldn’t find herself believing it until he was awake, healed and had left the hospital. The last thing Emily heard before they started the walk to his room, was David’s gentle greeting of Haley over the phone.

She didn’t remember a lot of what the doctor said, though the fact that he had been stabbed nine times stuck with her. He wasn’t awake, either, still dazed by the various medications and painkillers they had him on. It was odd seeing him like this, so pale, so lifeless, as he laid in the bed. He was connected to machines and IV stands via wires and tubes, the machine monitoring his heartbeat filling the room with a steady beep. Emily couldn’t quite know at what point the nurse left her there, standing about a foot from his bedside, but when she came to it, she realised it was just her in the room. Her and Aaron.

Slowly, she pulled a chair closer to his bed, though she didn’t sit down on it to be comfortable. Emily sat on the very end of the chair, finding herself hesitating as she reached both hands out, taking one of his hands in hers. It wasn’t a lot, but right now, it was everything she could do; just hold his hand, and hope to God that somehow he felt it, that somehow it could reassure him, telling him that he wasn’t alone.

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STOP.

In many ways, everything they worked was considered to be an unbearable case. Pictures of decapitated heads burning themselves into their brains, haunting stories of joggers finding dead bodies in the woods, or kidnapping victims showing up bruised and wounded with bad cases of stockholm syndrome. The team had built themselves decent coping mechanisms, though they didn’t always work, which had always been a subject that got Aaron’s brain going as they travelled long distances to help detectives take down their criminals. However, he had never been one who realised how his own coping mechanism was just as bad as anyone else’s, if not worse.

Eating and drinking, and even sleeping, was left out of Aaron’s schedule when they worked cases. Before his relationship with Emily had started, no one seemed to notice – and if they did, they didn’t bother to share their worries with him. However, Emily found herself worrying about him, possibly even a lot more than she should.

As they watched the team clear out of the precinct one evening, about an hour after the last detective had exited the precinct, Emily took the chance to look at Aaron, the same way she would study him from across the living room of their apartment; the way she didn’t usually allow herself to look at him when they worked. The dim lighting of the precinct cast shadows across his face, shadows that were representative of how tired he must be. “Maybe we should call it a night too, you know.” Emily suggested, her tone gentle as he lifted his head, though shaking it. “Aaron, I know you want this solved, but how on Earth are you expecting to solve this when you don’t sleep, don’t eat, and don’t drink anything but coffee?”

“No one ever complains.” He shrugged slightly, lowering his head again as his focus returned to the case files, his mind desperately trying to draw some sort of comparisons between the murders they had been presented with.

Little did he know his words caused Emily’s heart to break a little. No one ever complains. Because no one ever cares? No one ever notices? She wasn’t sure, but she was not about to let him wear himself out. They needed his mind to solve this case, and they were not getting the best of him if he came crashing down. “Aaron.” Her tone was more stern this time, causing him to drop his pen, looking up again. “This is not up for debate.” She furrowed her brows at him, doing her best to mimic his infamous Hotch–face.

“Emily–,”

“No, don’t Emily me.” She shook her head a little. “Aaron, since the day I started working with the BAU, I’ve seen this; seen how you push your own needs aside to work the cases. I’ve also seen how no one seems to bother pushing you to take care of yourself, and well, I’m tired of it. You’re important Aaron, too important to be admitted to an emergency room somewhere because you’re dehydrated, sleep deprived and haven’t eaten a proper meal the last three days.” He looked as if he wanted to respond, though he lowered his head, picking up his pen to continue sifting through the casefiles again. However, he froze as Emily reached across the table, nudging the pen out of his hand, entwining their fingers together. “Aaron, please.” She sighed. “I need you to stop, just for tonight.”

When he lifted his head, he could see how her expression was laced with genuine concern, something he hadn’t seen being expressed in his direction for a long time. “Okay.” Aaron nodded, giving her hand a light squeeze, using the other hand to gather together the papers. “Let’s call it a night. Though, if the rest of the team shows up tomorrow, expecting me to have solved the case, I’m blaming you.”

Emily rolled her eyes at him, causing him to chuckle. “I’ll happily take the blame if it means you’ll take care of yourself.”

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DISPLAY.

“I want to inform you that we have spotted the suspect.” A tall detective entered the office where the BAU worked the case, catching the attention of all agents. “He is, as suspected, working an assignment at a jewellery store down–town, where he is helping shoot some advertisement photos today. If we move now, we might be able to send some undercover officers in and get more eyes inside the place.”

“We’ll go.” Aaron offered, nodding at Emily. They were the only two who hadn’t been in direct contact with their suspect, or people close to him, meaning there was little to no chance he would recognize the two of them. “I need the rest of you in plain vehicles outside, no government SUVs. That might raise his suspicions.” The unit chief ordered, the rest of the team nodding. For a second, Emily doubted if this was well thought through by the unit chief, but she chose not to doubt him, simply following him out to the old Corvette they were allowed to borrow from one of the detectives at the precinct.

“I think this will be the first and last time I’ll ever be sitting in a Corvette that’s almost as old as me.” Emily mumbled, causing Aaron to chuckle slightly as he turned the key in the ignition.

“Tell that to Dave, and he’ll bring you out in about eight different cars who are older than the both of us.” Aaron responded, tossing a glance in her direction. She smiled at his words, though the rest of their drive to the jewellery store was done in silence, trying to gather her thoughts. “You okay over there?” Aaron raised an eyebrow as he parked the car, placing a hand on her thigh, making sure she knew he was there. “You seem a little thoughtful.”

“Just ran through the worst possible scenarios in my head, but I’m good now.” Emily nodded, chuckling a little as she saw the grimace spread on Aaron’s face. “Yeah, yeah – I know. We’re not going to act out any of the bad scenarios, and I am thankful for that. I don’t feel like wiping your brain off my shirt because we were busted.”

“Emily.” Aaron hissed, rolling his eyes as they stepped out of the car, her joining him at his right side as the two gathered their thoughts. “Are you ready for this?” He noticed their team spread around them in various locations; David and Derek were seated at a bench a few feet down from them, enjoying coffees – though their gazes were locked on the two agents in front of the jewellery store. JJ pretended to have car trouble across the street, two of the detectives helping her sort it out, and Spencer … Well, he was portraying a tourist. At least that’s what Emily assumed, as she noticed him wandering down the street with a map in his hands.

“I am.” She nodded, tilting her head backwards to make eye contact with him. “Are you ready to face a ruthless killer?”

“I’ve got you at my side. Nothing’s scary then.” He shrugged slightly, his voice dropping to make sure she was the only one to hear it. Emily chewed on the inside of her cheek, trying not to smile too much. “Oh, and one more thing.” Aaron spoke up, looking down as he linked their hands together, giving her hand a gentle squeeze. “Do you think he’ll buy our act now?”

Emily didn’t need to answer; catching Derek and David share a look on the bench was more than enough for her. “If not, he’d be a fool.”

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COLD.

The first thing the team was informed when they stepped onto the jet was how there were issues with the heating – as if spending four days working outside in Chicago, during the winter, wasn’t cold enough. Groans erupted from the agents, who quickly started making deals around to huddle together for warmth. Derek, being like a personal space heater, ended up on the couch between JJ and Spencer, making sure the two agents were tucked into their blankets, before he found himself falling asleep. David did his best to curl underneath his winter–coat, a cup of what appeared to be tea in his hands as he buried himself with a good book. Having had a chat with the pilot, Aaron was last when it came to finding himself a spot to sit, though the choices weren’t many.

He wasn’t feeling like chatting with David while flying back to Virginia, even though he had nothing against the Italian. Instead, he slipped down in the seat opposite of Emily, stifling a chuckle as she huffed. “It’s freezing. Of all the times the heating could fail, why during winter?” She uttered, tucking her blanket tighter around her body, trying to warm herself in the best way possible. “And why did it have to fail after we spent four days in freezing cold Chicago?”

“You ask me.” Aaron shrugged, leaning back in his seat. He had abandoned his suit in the go–bag, currently wearing one of his warm quarter zip sweaters. It wasn’t often he chose to wear something other than a suit while working, but having worn a suit in cold temperatures before, he refused to make the same mistake again. He regretted not having brought another one, seeing how Emily could have done with one just about now. Glancing over his shoulder, he noticed how David had dozed off (or read the book with his eyes closed; with David Rossi, one could never truly know), before motioning for Emily to occupy the seat beside him instead. “I have a blanket that I’m positive is warmer than yours, and besides, you look like you could do with a warm hug.”

His words were accompanied by a smile, a gentle smile that flashed his dimples, just the way Emily knew she could never truly turn down. Quietly, she moved around the table as he lifted the armrest, making sure there was room for her to curl up as close to him as possible. “There we go.” Aaron chuckled softly as she draped her blanket over the both of them, snuggling her face close to the fabric of his sweater. “You did good work in the field.” He complimented; it felt weird to drop it now, in this setting, but there had not been a natural enough moment to mention it earlier, not wanting to blurt it out in front of the entire team either. She chuckled a little at his words, slipping her hands into his, causing him to yelp. “Emily, your hands are like ice.”

“I know.” Emily mumbled, her words muffled against the fabric of his sweater, half expecting him to draw his hands away from hers. Instead, he surprised her, taking both her hands in his, lifting one to press a gentle kiss against her knuckles.

“Well, we’ve got a few hours to get all of you warmed up.” Aaron nodded, snaking one arm around her as he pulled her even closer, pressing a gentle kiss against her hair. “That includes your freezing hands.”

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STILL.

The days had been crazy. Emily had been in France, Aaron had been in Pakistan, and now they were both whisked back to Quantico. Ian Doyle had resurfaced, Derek having drawn him out. It was their chance at an endgame, chasing the evil away. At least their own, personal evil. David didn’t seem surprised about Emily being alive, mumbling something about Aaron having to work on his acting when it came to her. Derek was confused – he understood, but he was confused. Spencer turned, creating his own personal vendetta against both Emily and JJ, though Aaron found himself confused as to why the doctor didn’t have a vendetta against him (to which he learned later was because Spencer had spent hours on JJ’s couch, being vulnerable and emotional about the passing of his friend, all while JJ knew Emily was alive and well. Or, as well as she could be on the other side of the world, alone, with a false identity.

Aaron and Emily hadn’t had a lot of time together since their returns, but their focus wasn’t even on that. They wanted to work this out, arrest Doyle once and for all, and to save Declan, the young boy Emily had helped to safety once before.

Boston was a whirlwind. Actually, returning to Quantico was a whirlwind, anything that came after just built onto it, becoming more like a hurricane, a storm she couldn’t quite bear. Doyle had died. Declan’s mother had died. The boy had survived, though he had gone through some trauma he would have to work around for the future. However, it had ended. The chapter of lies and deceiving was over, and while it felt like someone had lifted the weight of the world off Emily’s shoulders, it all still felt weird. Aaron sought her out on the jet, noticing how the rest of the team huddled together, not sure how to act around the returned agent.

The unit chief placed a cup of coffee on the table in front of her, giving her a small, reassuring smile as he noticed the way she lifted her gaze. “I thought you’d like this.” He shrugged slightly, scratching the stubble on his chin as he sat down opposite of her. Emily furrowed her brows a little, studying his features, noticing how he looked different. He looked rougher with the beard, though it seemed as if he carried the assignment from Pakistan with him. “Don’t worry, it’s gone first thing in the morning. Jack didn’t like it either.” Aaron stifled a chuckle, hoping it would brighten Emily’s mood a little. “How was Paris?”

“Everything you would expect it to be when you can’t be yourself, can’t be with the people you love, and, well–,” she paused, sighing heavily. “Knowing you, and knowing the rest of the team was still here, so far away, it felt weird.”

Aaron’s gaze landed on her hand as she reached out for the cup, noticing the slight tremble in her fingers, his jaw clenching slightly. He hated seeing her like this, the usually steady hand. Usually she was his steady hand, the one who could comfort and ease him down in any situation. Now, none of them seemed to have the ability to do that for each other. “It sounds like Pakistan, then.” He shrugged, noticing how the expression on her face changed when he mentioned his assignment.

“Yeah – may I ask why you went to Pakistan?”

“If you ask Strauss, she might have an answer for you.” He chuckled a little, lifting his own cup of coffee to his lips, the warm steam from the beverage hitting him in the face, causing him to scrunch his nose a little. “She needed someone to lead an assignment across borders, and I was tired of butting against the wall of our apartment. Jessica didn’t even hesitate to take in Jack, telling me it was probably good for me to get away for a while, to clear my head.” He shrugged, his hand once again scratching against his beard. “Home didn’t really feel like a home without you there.”

“So you ran?” Emily raised an eyebrow, waiting to see if he would respond, though he didn’t do anything but furrowed his brows a little. She didn’t blame him – in fact, she would probably have done the same thing if it was the other way around. Clearing her throat a little, she decided to change the subject, tossing a quick glance in the direction of where Spencer and Derek were conversing, seemingly unaware of how she looked at them. “Spencer seems to be uncomfortable.”

“He needs time to adjust. I think they all do.” Aaron sighed, lowering his head a little. “Nothing about this has been a good time for anyone; the team more or less fell apart after you left, and then I left. David took some time off to work on a book or whatever.” He trailed off, his gaze having returned to look at her when she turned her gaze back to him.

She wasn’t aware how big an impact she had on the team. She wasn’t aware she could be the reason the whole team, a team of found family, could turn and fall apart the second she was gone. It caused her heart to ache, and she was only hoping she could make a fairly quick recovery in her friendship with them – though she knew they needed their time to cope. She had been dead to them, after all. Emily also knew she needed time to cope for herself, already having the name and number for a therapist suggested to her, ready to call the number as soon as the dust had settled.

“What did you tell Jack?” She spoke up, her tone slightly curious as she looked at him.

“Well, he has already lost an important person in his life with Haley, and it broke him when he came to realise that she was, in fact, dead.” Aaron paused, resting his elbows on the table as he leaned forward. “So, to spare him, I told him you were off working some super–secret mission in another country, and that I wasn’t sure when you’d return.” He explained, tilting his head a little as he looked at Emily. “Jessica had him during your funeral, bringing him to the zoo. It saved my ass, really.”

“I’m sorry you had to lie to him.”

“Hey, was it really a lie, though?” Aaron countered, a playful smile tugging on his lips, soon being mirrored on Emily’s face. “I mean, for what it’s worth, I’m also sure you did an important job for a super–secret mission while you were in Paris. However, he’ll be over the moon to see you again.” The unit chief reached out for her hand, engulfing her hand in his. The skin of his palm was warm against hers, and she wasn’t able to hide the smile on her face as he gave her hand a gentle squeeze – the same kind of squeeze they had grown accustomed to giving one another when they wanted to show their support, show they were there for one another. “I’m glad you’re back, Emily.”

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LOVE.

“You can’t be serious with me; was your ultimate reaction to encountering trouble within your team to pay a visit to Rossi’s to make pasta and get drunk?” Emily raised an eyebrow as she looked at Aaron, carefully watching him as he pulled a polo–shirt down over his head, revealing a big grin on his face. “That’s kind of not like you, you know that, right? Rossi told me you sat everyone down and forced them into having a heart–to–heart conversation about losing me, so I don’t see how getting drunk over a pot of pasta should solve everything.”

Aaron shrugged slightly, closing the distance between them as he placed his hands on her hips, a kiss to her forehead. “Well, what can I say? After Morgan denied that he was grieving the fifth time I asked him, I figured it was best to change my methods.” He tilted his head a little, his eyes studying every feature of her face. Part of him still couldn’t believe he was standing there with her in his arms again; sending her to Paris had seemed like an end to their relationship, and he felt lucky they were able to figure out where they stood together upon her return. This time around, they had also been adamant about informing Strauss of their relationship. She had frowned, informing Emily of the way it would make a future advancement within the Bureau difficult as long as she was in a committed relationship with her boss, though the female agent didn’t hesitate. The Behavioural Analysis Unit was where she wanted to stay. “When Garcia then kept pressing Dave to help her learn how to cook pasta, I saw an opening, and I was clever enough to take it.”

Emily chuckled a little, her hands finding the collar of his polo as she stretched up to place a kiss on his lips, a sweet, tender action that caused him to hum. “We should probably get going. If Rossi is going to actually teach us all how to make pasta, then we’re going to be there for the entire thing – his reaction when we all miserably fail will be worth it.” She smiled against his lips, chuckling as he groaned a little, pressing a deeper kiss to her lips, before parting from her, finding his keys from the dresser in their bedroom.

A short drive later, they were at the door to David Rossi’s mansion, the sight of the house causing Aaron to roll his eyes. “This is some of the absolutely richest shit I’ve seen in a very long time.” The unit chief scoffed, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans as he heard the doorbell ring on the other side of the door. Emily chuckled, linking her arm with his as they waited, being greeted by a happily smiling David, who swung the door open to reveal a staircase just as grand as the mansion itself, if not even more impressive.

“There you are! We’re only missing Reid now, and we’re all here.” David pulled them both in for a hug, quickly pressing a kiss against Emily’s cheek, before returning to the kitchen.

“He started the wine before people arrived, I see.” Aaron chuckled, a hand on the small of Emily’s back as they walked into the kitchen, where Penelope immediately cheered as she saw them, Derek handing them both glasses of wine. “If you plan on having us drink tonight, you might have to open up a few of your guest bedrooms as well, Dave.”

The Italian waved it off. “Don’t worry, Hotch, it’s all taken care of. Rooms are all ready for my visitors.” He smiled, before busying himself with the pasta dough, Penelope clinging onto him as she tried to suck up as much information as possible, both JJ and Derek standing at the kitchen island. The team was startled as another person entered the kitchen, none of them truly sure if they were imagining something or actually seeing Spencer stand there, an apologetic smile spreading on his lips as he looked at Aaron and Emily, before joining JJ and Derek at the kitchen island.

“Seems he’s gotten over the worst of it.” Aaron lowered his voice, glancing at Emily, only to see her already looking at him. “See? This wasn’t such a bad idea after all.”

She chuckled, linking their hands together, entwining their fingers, and leaning her head against his shoulder. “You were right, Aaron.”.

#hotchniss fanfic #hotchniss #ssahotchfics #the things we do ...#the things we do ... while holding hands #aaron hotchner #emily prentiss

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stanknotstark · 3 years

Text

Truth Serum

Hello everyone! My name is Amber and I’m not new to writing however I am new to actually posting my writing but recently I really got back into Loki with all the trailers dropping and stuff and I’ve had so many ideas crossing my mind so I figured I’d write some of my ideas out and post them here! Honestly this is my first time writing for Loki so he might be a bit OOC until I really get him under my buckle! This piece doesn’t have a lot of Loki in it because I’m also testing out writing with more than two people getting focus so I apologize in advance but I’ll probably write the 2nd piece tomorrow where Loki confronts ‘you’. Enjoy! Gif not mine!

You had just finished sweeping and mopping in Tony’s lab because there was glass on the ground. The only abnormal thing was that there was opalescent liquid in-between all the broken glass, your guess was that it must have been in some vial for safe keeping meaning you should have been careful.

Should. Key word right there.

Realizing you had gotten some of the mystical liquid on yourself you quickly finished up cleaning then found Tony who was visiting with Steve in the living room.

“Tony, Tony, Tony,” You incessantly said in a sing song voice as you approached, “Heya, Stevo.”

“Look there was a broken vial in your lab and you know I was down there for my blueprints and while cleaning said broken glass the liquid might have touched my skin....”

Tony frowned and Steve’s eyes widened and looked at Tony.

“Listen just tell me if I’m dying or not?”

Tony stood there staring at your face for another few seconds before you literally saw the realization hit him like a bus. Tony smiled.

“You know I’ve always had this question in the back of my brain since you said your blueprints were apparently....’Only meant for clearance level 10s’ I think I remember you saying...”

You frowned at Tony and shrugged, “I mean...no one is level 10 so don’t be offended...What does that have to do with this?”

“What exactly are those precious blueprints?”

You were going to give a witty remark but suddenly it was like word vomit and you couldn’t stop the next words from flowing out of your mouth, “They’re a new helmet I’m making for Loki that include audio, kinda like headphones, so he can listen to his favorite Mid-guardian books while on missions with us.”

Tony smirked which then turned into a full on smile before letting out a laugh. Steve looked at you with a confused puppy look on his face. You, unfortunately, realized what that liquid was.

“Tony I swear to God if that liquid I touched was a truth serum I’m literally going to castrate you!”

Tony, still laughing, put his hands up in a surrendering way and shook his head.

“I’m not the one that decided to clean up a mysterious liquid in my lab, of all places, without proper cleaning gear!”

At this point everyone in the room was looking at you three. Natasha and Clint were on one couch in the living room, Loki sat with his legs criss cross, back to the window overlooking NYC, and Wanda and Vision sat on the opposite couch from Natasha and Clint. The only two missing were Thor and Bruce. Much to your luck as you looked around at everyone, you realized they all overheard Tony because they all had mischievous smirks crossing their faces.

“STOP! I’ll answer questions BUT nothing too personal please...” You said putting on your best puppy eyes and giving an exasperated sigh. Surprisingly enough you looked at your crush, Loki, and saw he was the only one without a mischievous smirk, for once. He did however put down the book he had been reading and instead had a focused look on his face as he played with the green magic floating between his hands. No one else paid him any mind though.

“Who’s your favorite Avenger?” Natasha shot out leaning back into the couch with a smirk.

“Tony.”

“YES!” Tony shouted pumping a fist into the air.

“Why?” Natasha asked.

“Because he’s like a dad to me, not to mention he makes us really cool gear meaning I don’t have to slave away in the lab by myself anymore.” You rolled your eyes as you finished the sentence. Tony beside you pulled you into a gut crushing hug and said, “Awe, FRIDAY can you put up adoption papers on my computer in the lab and set a reminder to fill them out later today?”

“Tony, stop, God, you’re embarrassing.” You pushed from his hug, blushing.

“For some reason I’m not really surprised.” Nat said shrugging.

You giggled and made your way to the middle of the room, taking a seat in an available love seat, Tony and Steve coming to stand behind it.

Next Wanda sat up with an excited look on her face and asked, “Who do you think is the strongest Avenger?”

Thor walked in and gave a hearty chuckle, “Me, of course!”

“No, actually, I think it’s a tie between you, Wanda, and Loki.”

“What, no no, surely you’re mistaken, dear?” Thor said now chuckling nervously.

Steve smiled over to him and shrugged, “No, Thor, she accidentally touched a truth serum, this is as honest as she’ll ever be buddy.”

“Why am I one of the strongest Avengers?” Loki asked, his hands still playing with the magic but his complete attention on you.

“Your magic may not be on Wanda’s par, at least what I know about it, but you’ve endured quite the amount of emotion grief and came out on top so I guess I see you as the strongest, emotionally...” You finished with a wince since it kind of aired out Loki’s dirty laundry and was a bit mushy if you were being honest. Loki hummed but went back to focusing on his magic.

Thor frowned then a happy look over took his face, “Are you in love with anyone in the room?”

“Whoa!”

“Thor!”

“Wait, Thor!”

You laughed out loud and let the answer go freely, unconsciously glancing back to Loki who wasn’t looking at you but had a raised brow and seemed to only be half focusing on the green magic cloud in his hands, “Yes.”

“Thor buddy that’s a bit personal.” Tony said, an eyebrow raised in a disappointed dad sort of way.

“My apologies!” Thor said making his way to the kitchen, “I hear a Poptart calling my name, perhaps a smores today.”

“Is it fair to say we may ask questions about this love interest considering it’s one of us?” Vision asked with a vexed look on his face.

Loki cleared his throat and everyone gave him attention, “Perhaps we should keep that as a restricted topic considering she did say nothing too personal?”

You weighed the pros and cons in your head, while you were nervous for Loki to find out it was him maybe this was the way to get it out in the open. Lord knows you would take advantage of it considering every time you spoke with Loki nowadays you turned into a blabbering mess and tended to leave every conversation read in the cheeks from fluster and embarrassment.

“I don’t mind you asking questions but don’t out right ask me his name.” You said deciding to get this over with.

“Well we can cut out Natasha and Wanda then.” Tony said catching onto you saying him. “Reindeer games what on Earth are you doing anyways?”

Loki glanced at Tony and smirked, “Nervous?”

Tony frowned and backed up a bit, “You know, I wasn’t but I am now...”

Loki chuckled and went back to focusing on his magic flowing freely between his fingers and pulsing between his hands now, “Nothing that will harm anyone, Stark, don’t get your britches in a bunch.”

You smiled at Loki then looked around at everyone, “Ok, hit me!”

“I know you said don’t ask a name but you did just say Tony was a father figure I was hoping you didn’t...” Clint started and ended softly with fear in his eyes.

Seeing as it wasn’t a full question you didn’t feel word vomit coming up but decided to play around with Clint since he never ceased to prank you all the time.

“I might have a daddy kink...” You said looking up at Tony, trying your best to give him a lustful look but couldn’t hold in your laughter when Clint started gagging, “No, Clint, it’s not Tony.”

You laughed a bit when you heard Tony let out a heavy sigh of relief. You then brought a hand up and covered your giggle when Clint said a tiny, “Oh thank god.”

“I swear, it better not be Vision, he’s mine!” Wanda said suddenly with wide eyes.

“Not vision.” You responded.

You could feel Tony’s fingers behind you rhythmically tapping on the leather love seat, showing his growing impatience.

“It’s not Steve, Tony.” You said trying to placate the man since he had told you in confidence that he was trying to find a good way to ask the man out.

“You realize that only leaves Clint...and me, right?” Loki said with an unsure smirk. You gave the man a smile and stood up. Loki had finally finished playing with his magic, halfway through you realized what he had been doing seeing as you felt the truth serum slowly letting up in you. He had finally worked out the chemicals from your system and you were back to normal.

“Unfortunately I’m not outright telling you all who it is, if you haven’t been paying attention to me recently that’s on you.” You said before heading towards the kitchen, Loki still smirking as he watched you walk away.

“I feel a smores Poptart calling my name too.”

After you had disappeared Clint cleared his throat and looked at Loki, “It’s totally me, sorry i mean have you seen these guns, Loki? You have nothing on me.”

Loki chuckled and picked his book back up, “I think I have more to offer than you think Clint, but keep telling yourself it’s you if it helps that mortal brain of yours sleep at night.”

#loki x reader #loki laufeyson #loki odinson #reader insert #truth serum pt. 1 #my writing

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avengerscompound · 3 years

Text

Until the End of the World - 19

Until the End of the World: A Captain America Fanfic

Masterlist PREVIOUS //

Buy me a ☕ Character Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Steve Rogers x F!Reader

Word Count: 2174

Rating: E

Warnings: Descriptions of giving birth

Synopsis: Four years after Steve and Bucky got to the bottom of the HYDRA conspiracy that had led to you and your son being hunted for the first three years of his life, you, Bucky, and Steve have carved out a nice life together. Things are calm and you feel like a family unit. When Geo starts calling Bucky and Steve ‘dad’, a decision is made to try and add to your family.

Things aren’t as calm as they seem. When your pregnancy hits the papers, HYDRA rears its head once again, and Steve and Bucky need to track you down to protect the family they had created.

Chapter 19

Bucky was having a lot of difficulty hiding his panic. There were a lot of emotions coursing through him right now. Fear, excitement, stress, confusion, happiness all surged through him, mixing to make him a highly anxious mess. He welcomed those feelings. He normally shut down so much while on a mission and retreated into his ‘winter soldier’ headspace that he felt nothing at all. Seeing you in that hall with Viper attacking you, he’d reacted on instinct, firing his gun before he even considered all the ramifications of it. It would have happened anyway, when he was the soldier he assessed risk quickly and acted without question. Seeing you had just increased the urgency of it.

As Viper dropped to the ground the actual reality of what was happening crashed down on him, thrusting the soldier back into the dark and dragging Bucky right into the driver's seat again, and now he was crouched on the floor of what looked like an office, in a secret underground HYDRA base, cradling his son, and a crying infant, while you were on all fours giving birth to his daughter.

“Okay,” he said to himself as he tried to soothe the two crying children. “Okay. I’ve got this.”

“Bucky,” you wailed. “Bucky… I don’t know what to do. I can’t do this.”

“It’s okay, babe,” he said and rubbed Geo’s back. “G, I need you to be really brave for me buddy. I need some help.”

Geo shook his head and pushed his face a little harder into Bucky’s neck.

“Geo,” you said. “Your sister’s coming. And your mom needs me to help get him out. I can’t do that if I have to hold you and the baby. You think you can help me out?”

Geo raised his head a little and wiped his eyes. He gave a small nod.

“Thank you. I promise as soon as I can, I’ll pick you up, and you can sit right here if you want,” he said, as he put Geo down. “Now I know this baby is crying a lot, but I need you to hold them okay. You want to sit down and I’ll give the baby to you?”

Geo looked at you and scrambled back against a wall. Bucky carried the crying baby over and crouched down again. “Can you do this, buddy?” He asked.

Geo nodded and Bucky put the squalling infant into the little boy's arms. “I know it’s not fun,” he said and took his earpiece out and put it into Geo’s ear. “Here, you can talk to your dad, or FRIDAY to distract you. But I need you to be gentle and just hold the baby like that. And when your dad is at the door, you can let him in, but don’t let in anyone you don’t know, okay?”

Geo nodded and Bucky pressed a kiss to the boy’s brow. “You’re doing so well, I’m so proud of you,” he said.

Bucky didn’t feel great about leaving Geo with the baby, but there wasn’t much choice. He returned to your side and knelt behind you. “I’m here, honey,” he said, gently massaging your hips. You hadn’t changed position since he’d left you - you were still on your hands and knees, but now your arms were bent and you had your forehead pressed on your forearms and your ass popped up in the air. “You comfortable like that?”

“No,” you whined. “But it’s the best I can get. Bucky how is she?”

Bucky shook his head. “I don’t know, babe, but I can see her hair. She has your hair. I bet she’s going to look like you.”

“Do I push?” You asked. “I don’t know if I should be pushing.”

Bucky chuckled. “I don’t know, honey. Do you feel like you need to?”

“Yes,” you whined.

“Then push. I’m right here. I’ll get her,” he said, hoping he sounded more confident about this than he felt.

You moaned as you strained and more of the baby started to show. Thankfully Bucky had paid attention to the birthing videos in class, because this had to be the weirdest thing he’d ever seen, and he’d seen some pretty weird things. It was blood and messy and it looked like she was about to tear you in half. “You’re doing great, darlin’. Keep pushing.”

You strained again, bearing down and the baby’s whole head slipped free. Bucky used his fingers to pull her chin free, and tried to get her shoulders into a better position. “Looking good, honey. Nearly there.”

The door opened and Bucky barely heard it over your moans and the cries of the infant with Geo. Geo’s voice grabbed his attention though. “Daddy!” Geo said.

Bucky whipped around, first looking at Geo who was sitting in the corner with the baby and then to the door where he was looking. Steve stood, filling the frame, his shield in hand, and standing in a defensive position as he surveyed the situation in front of him. He quickly put the shield on his back and strode inside. “Honey, are you okay?” He asked, crouching by your head.

You nodded. “They gave me something…” you said, sounding almost apologetic.

“It’s okay. We’ve got you,” Steve said.

You winced and strained again, pushing. Bucky helped wiggle the baby’s shoulders free and she slipped right out. As soon as her body was free her tiny newborn wails joined the other baby’s cries. “She’s here,” Bucky said, holding her in his arms and lifting her for you to see. “You did it.”

You rolled onto our back and started to cry, and Bucky carefully put the infant on your chest. With all the things he’d done in his life. All the lives he’d taken, he had never been responsible for bringing life into the world. It felt good, even under these insane and tense conditions. He only took a moment to appreciate it before getting up and going to Geo. “Okay. You did so well,” Bucky said, taking the baby back from the boy.

Geo got up and scrambled over to you and Steve, crashing into Steve’s side. Steve picked him up and put him on his hip. “Did you help?” Steve asked gently.

Geo nodded but didn’t say anything. Bucky wondered how long it would take before Geo would be able to shake any of this off, or if he’d ever be able to. How much can a kid go through before it does permanent damage? “What happened? Who’s baby is that?” Steve asked.

“Can you help me sit up?” You asked. Steve helped you into a sitting position and let you lean against him. “They’d been keeping other people here. From the tests. I don’t know if they’d had them from the start or if they only bought them in recently… but… they … they were breeding them, Steve. Like they were animals. Trying to replicate Geo. That baby… I don’t know if there are more, but his mother asked me to look after him.”

“Okay,” Steve soothed as you, babbled to him. “It’s okay. We’ll figure it out.” He paused and held his hand to his ear. “Tony… she just gave birth, we’re going to need a medivac… Alright… page me when it’s clear.”

“What’s happening?” Bucky asked.

“They’re still rounding up the last of them,” Steve asked. “Geo, can you tell if there are any other exits that our friends didn’t come through?”

Geo shook his head. “I didn’t let ‘em out,” he mumbled into Steve’s neck.

“Good boy,” Steve said. “You’ve been so brave and done so well. You know that?”

“Steve… Steve…” you said, shaking your head. “Steve we need to say he’s ours.”

“What?” Steve asked, confused.

“There’s no record of him being born,” you said. “No one will know. We need to say he’s ours. That I had twins.”

“Sweetheart,” Steve said, gently. “You’re not thinking straight.”

“She made me promise if anything happened to her…” you implored. “Please, Steve.”

Bucky looked down at the tiny infant in his arms. He could pass for Bucky’s if not anyone else’s. He was a little bigger than the little girl now on your chest, but barely. Though, with the fact she was still attached to her umbilical cord, Bucky wasn’t sure how easily they could fake it.

“We’ll work it out,” Steve promised. “I swear, he’ll come home with us. You won’t break your promise.”

It was another hour before the site was secure and a medical team managed to come and collect you. In that time, you had passed the placenta too, and Steve had sent one of the legion down to the med bay for a clamp and he’d clamped off and cut the umbilical cord. You and the two infants were taken by ambulance back to the tower and to the medbay. The facility was state of the art and it meant that the baby - Gal - could stay with you because anytime that it was even hinted at that he be taken away, you would start to panic again.

Geo wouldn’t leave your side and he didn’t particularly like it if Bucky or Steve went anywhere either. He stayed on your gurney on the ride out of the HYDRA facility and all the medical checks that you and he had to do, had to be done in the same room.

You, Geo, and the two infants were finally sleeping. Geo was sleeping in the crook of your arm on the hospital bed, and they’d set up two more for Steve and Bucky to use because Geo didn’t want to have anyone separated.

Steve had used the opportunity to go sort out some of the legal paperwork and make sure that every i was dotted and every t crossed. When he returned to check on everyone, he looked tired and frazzled.

“Still sleeping?” He asked as he sat down next to Bucky on the couch in the corner.

Bucky nodded. “They’ve been through a lot. “It’s going to be a while before they get over this.”

Steve frowned and nodded. “We should have been more careful.”

Bucky nodded. “Can’t do anything about that now,” he said. “We’ll be more careful from now on.”

Steve sighed and let his head fall back against the wall. Bucky took his hand and linked their fingers together. “It occurred to me while I was talking to Ross, we haven’t named our daughter yet.”

Bucky smiled. “Yeah. I guess that’s what happens when you take the ‘wait to meet her approach and then meeting her is an unmitigated disaster,” he said. “It can wait. She’s here and safe. That’s the main thing.”

Steve nodded and let out a breath. “Yeah…” he turned and smiled at Bucky. “Look at you, choosing the positive side.”

Bucky laughed softly and shoved him. “Jerk.”

The two men remained silent for a moment, just watching as the rest of their family slept. “What are we going to do about Gal?” Bucky asked eventually.

Steve shook his head. “I’m not opposed to adopting him. You know biology isn’t important to me. But what if he has family out there? And I mean that really… what if? They have a right to know and they would have been grieving over his parents. But if they want to raise him, what if they’re not set up for it? And what if he has no family? We’re having enough trouble trying to adopt Geo, and that’s with his biological mother’s permission. What if they deem us unsafe? And who could blame them, look what happened?”

Bucky frowned. “What are you saying?”

“I don’t know… I guess…” Steve said. “I guess I’m saying, maybe we should just lie about his birth. Say they are twins. We were the only ones there for her birth. Who’s going to argue? Some imprisoned HYDRA agents?”

“You’re seriously considering it?” Bucky asked. “That’s … kind of illegal, Steve.”

“Because I’ve never broken the law when I thought it was necessary,” Steve snarked. “Did you forget I was a war criminal?”

Bucky chuckled. “Well, if you’re serious, I’ll support it, but you better decide one way or the other. Because it needs to be done when we fill in the birth certificates, and we’re going to need to convince some doctors to back us up.”

Steve nodded and ran his thumb over the back of Bucky’s hand. “I know,” he said. “I have FRIDAY discreetly searching for his family based on what we know. It’ll be easier to decide if we know either way.”

Bucky nodded and smiled a little. “Be good having a great big instant family though, wouldn’t it?”

Steve let go of Bucky’s arm and wrapped his arm around him. Bucky leaned into the embrace as Steve pressed his face into Bucky’s hair and inhaled. “We’ll figure it out,” Steve said.

Bucky sighed. He knew they would, it was just that there was so much. He hoped the choice they made was the right one.

// NEXT

#steve rogers #bucky barnes #steve rogers x reader #bucky barnes x reader #stucky #steve rogers x bucky barnes #stucky x reader #steve rogers x reader x bucky barnes #captain america fanfic #fanfic #fanfiction #reader insert #pregnancy #until the end of the world

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yourmcu · 4 years

Text

Wish You Were Here (ii)

Pairings: Tony Stark x daughter!reader, Peter Parker x Stark!reader (platonic)

Summary:

an Infinity War/Endgame AU where Tony Stark’s daughter (you) is one of half the population that vanishes in the snap, Tony finds out later on when he arrives back to Earth, devastated, then you come back like the others to help fight Thanos.

Word count: 3,115

A/n: (moved to the end of the fic!)

Warnings: angst, death, swearing, Morgan’s a cutie! and no seriously I miss him so much

read it on ao3!

Part 1

gif not mine! credits to the owner^^

Just like the others, you were brought back when the Avengers succeeded in retrieving all the infinity stones.

You're laying on the ground at the same place you were last time: Wakanda. Once you gain consciousness you struggle to get up, your legs wobbly.

“Hello?” You call out, but you're alone, can’t even contact anyone since your suit is out of power. You have no clear memory of what happened, just that you had an anxiety attack while Natasha held you, then you blacked out and - that’s it.

You felt a strong breeze and footsteps behind you.

“[Y/N] Stark,” a man’s voice says. “Come with me.”

The man is ancient looking, had a cape and his facial hair weirdly reminds you of Tony’s. “Who are you? And how long was I out?” You look at a sparking yellow portal far behind him, “did you do that?”

“Stick together and stick with Wong,” the man calls out before the portal closes. You have no idea who he was talking to since they already got in. “Doctor Stephen Strange. We need to find Pepper Potts and... get you suited.”

“I already am suited it’s just - no juice. What’s going on?”

“It’s been five years. It’s time, your father and the others need our help to defeat Thanos,” Doctor Strange opens up another portal to an unfamiliar cabin. Your eyes light up at the mention of Tony. “Quickly. We do not have much time.”

Five years? Unbelievable. That’s just insane. You like sleeping a lot but you couldn’t imagine being asleep for five long years.

“Are - are you sure we’re in the right pla - okay, sorry, don’t have much time, yeah,” you knock on the door when Doctor Strange gives you a stern and impatient look. It gets answered right away.

“[Y/N]? Oh my god,” Pepper says breathlessly. You could feel her sobbing while she hugs you tightly.

“Hey, you guys didn’t tell me you moved,” you frown. “Is all my stuff here? Mr. Strange wants me to get ready and this isn’t the only suit I have-”

“Doctor Strange.”

“It’s upstairs, last room on the left,” Pepper smiles as she wipes her tears. You nod and went up the stairs as the magic doctor told her everything.

All your stuff were in boxes and your spare iron suit was standing in a corner. You wiped away the dust off and checked if it was in good condition. It was ready to go.

You quickly charged the weapons and blasters on the suit, and you still needed to-

You hear a small gasp from behind the door.

Confused, you turn around to see a girl with an amazed smile on her face. “Y/N!”

You cautiously walk over to the small girl, “yeah, I’m Y/N, what’s your name?”

“Morgan,” she replies, then her eyes widen as she hides something behind her back. “Daddy said I can borrow your stuff as long as I put it back. They all look really cool.”

You still aren’t sure, but you start to put the pieces together in your mind: you were ‘gone’ for five years, this girl is living with Pepper, and if you guessed right, ‘daddy’ is Tony.

She’s your sister.

“It’s okay, and thanks,” she gives you a small hug which you return slightly, you feel a smile growing on your face since you find her really precious. “It’s nice to meet you, Morgan.

“Hey, so, there’s this weirdo man downstairs and he wants me and Pep - mom to do an errand for him,” you say to her once you remember you have to go. Morgan nods understandingly, “we can play and catch up when I get back, okay? That’s a promise.”

She runs back to her room and you get suited up, power at its maximum.

“Welcome back, Ms. Stark.”

“Glad to be. I missed you - actually, how Dad’s doing? Is he alright?”

“Mr. Stark had a concussion earlier, but as of now he is waking up again.”

“Oh,” you exhale and start worrying about him a bit. “Okay. That’s fine, I guess,”

Once you go back down a portal was already open and a nanny by the door (you assumed for Morgan). You fly right in before it closed up.

“Holy shit.”

There's armies coming out of many different portals, from people to aircrafts, to mutants. You all gather at the Avengers compound, or what used to be the compound.

“I forgot to mention,” you point out and Pepper turns to you, “That’s a pretty badass suit.”

You could feel Pepper roll her eyes from inside her suit. You follow her as she flies all the way to the front.

Your eyes dart everywhere to look for Tony. And there he is, getting up from the ground and flying back to the Avengers. He looks worn out, ragged, tired; you notice before his iron head covered him up. There’s so many people that you doubt he even saw you. God, you miss him so much.

Cap, Thor, Rhodey, Clint, Peter, Wanda, Bucky, Sam, Bruce - or Hulk, everyone was there, but where’s Natasha?

“Avengers!” Cap shouts, a hand extended as he catches Mjolnir without stumbling - whoa, what? - “assemble.”

That’s it. The battle begins.

It's your first time using your backup suit, you obviously didn’t have the time to test it out first. Good thing it works fine.

You're flying around, shooting enemies whenever they get in your way and helping anyone on your side who needed it.

What got you confused (not that you were complaining) was how the other Avengers were a bit too happy to see you than they normally should. You brushed it off though, they probably just love you so much like you love them.

“Aye, mind if you launch me? I need to be over there,” a raccoon holding a gun states and pointed to the direction. You recognize him immediately.

"Sure thing, bud,” you obliged, grabbing him, levitating off the ground and to thrust your iron arm forward like a cannon.

After a while the battle died down a bit and you saw Tony embracing Peter in a distance.

You smile sadly. Peter’s your best friend, but you really wish that it’s you who Tony was hugging.

Your jealousy fades when one of those giant flying Chitauri makes its way to their direction, ready to attack.

“Friday, activate the mega blaster,” you fly closer to the pair.

“Which one?” For fuck’s sake, Friday,

“The biggest one, please, now!” Once the blaster's out, you aim at the monster who's literally meters away from Tony and Peter and fire. When it crashes to the ground lifeless, you land beside them.

“Sorry, that was,” you pant, opening up your iron helmet. “It was literally going to eat you guys, so, uh, sorry for ruining the moment.”

Peter smiles, nodding and Tony looks at you as if he couldn’t believe his eyes.

He hadn’t seen you in so long that your sudden presence fucking took his breath away. You're here, alive and back. If you guys weren’t in such a situation he’d go on and tell you about all the things you missed.

“I’m probably in trouble, right? I mean.. look Dad, I’m in a battlefield,” you laugh nervously, shooting a creature from the corner of your eye. “In my defense, Doctor Strange was the one who came to me, I didn’t-”

You're cut off when Tony wraps his arms around you. Right now he didn’t care about your excuses as to why you were here. But if Tony from five years ago could see you now he’d definitely ground you for life and take away your lab privileges.

“You’re doing great.” his voice slightly muffled from the hug. You let out a squeak, not expecting that from him at all. Tony smiles and plants a kiss to your forehead. “I love you, kid.”

“I love you too, Dad.”

The battle carries on and you're being swarmed by more enemies. You got really beaten up as it went on - what really knocked you out was when Thanos’ spaceship rained fire.

Unable to get shelter, you try your best to dodge everything that came out of the ship. You could barely see anymore because of the chaos and the clouds of dust everywhere.

“Ms. Stark, you need to get somewhere safe! Your heart rate is also increasing dangerously fast.”

“Not - not helping, Fri-” you get cut off when one of the blue fires hit you on the head, sending you to the ground unconscious.

----

“[Y/N], come on buddy, you need to get up,” Peter. He found your body a while after he handed the gauntlet to Captain Marvel. The battle's still ongoing, but he’s focusing on keeping you away from it while he waits for you to wake up.

You quickly sit up and gasp for air, looking at your best friend. “Did we win? Did we - wait, Peter, look out!” You push him out of the way when a group of monsters make their way to both of you. They turn into dust before they could lunge forward, however.

“...what the..?”

He helps you up and the both of you run to where Rhodey and Tony are at. You nearly break down when you see the state he's in.

“Mr. Stark? Hey - Mr. Stark? It’s Peter... and look, Y/N’s here- she’s okay, sir-” While Peter tries to talk to him you kneel down beside him, placing a hand on his arm while you do your best not to cry.

Then he looks at you, mouthing it’s okay.

But you know it isn’t. On your part, anyway. It seems really selfish but you don’t know what you’d do without him. Tony has always been there for you, he always kept you going.

Pepper kneels beside you, gave you a reassuring look before looking at her husband. “Friday?”

“Life functions critical.” That makes you whimper, pulling yourself closer to Tony.

“Tony, look at me. We’re going to be okay. You can rest now.”

You nod, sniffling, resting your head on his shoulder lightly. “I love you. I’ll take good care of Morgan, dad. Don’t worry.”

When the light of his arc reactor goes out, that’s when both you and Pepper break down, comforting each other around Tony’s lifeless body.

----

Dresses really weren’t your thing. So were skirts and shorts. But you wore a short, black dress for Tony’s funeral. You didn’t care if you weren’t comfortable, it was for him. You’d do anything for him.

You barely got any sleep since the battle, you couldn’t now that he was gone. It didn’t feel right. You had no idea how to cope, how you could move on from this.

What made things worse is when Steve and Thor told you about what happened to Natasha, that’s why you didn’t see her in the battle. She gave her own life just to get everybody else back.

You must’ve zoned out again because Rhodey and Pepper are now setting something up in the living room. An Iron Man helmet.

“S’that going to be new decoration?” You force out a chuckle, sniffling afterwards, sitting down on the sofa behind them.

Iron Man’s eyes light up when Rhodey presses a button. You couldn’t believe what you were seeing. Tony sitting on a chair, a hologram.

He turns it off before hologram Tony could say a word. “That’s,” he sighs, “that’s for later.”

“I can’t do this,” you get up, running a hand through your hair. “I can’t. I’ll - I’ll break down, I know I will. Can I take a walk? Please?”

“Take your time.” Steve gives you a comforting smile.

Pepper nods. “Some air would do you good. Be back when it’s time, okay?”

You take longer calming yourself down in the woods near the cabin. You cried, you mumbled to yourself, paced back and forth,

Cause a picture is all that I have, To remind me that you're never coming back If I picture it now it just makes me sad And right now I just wish you were here.

You stop when you heard leaves crunching. Peter just arrived, along with his aunt.

“Hey,” Peter silently greets, pulling you into a hug. It's obvious he isn’t getting any sleep either. “Are you okay?”

“Of course not,” you murmur, pulling away. “I should probably head back inside.”

“I’ll see you in a bit.”

You slowly walk to the porch, stopping when you hear Tony’s voice inside. You decide to just wait outside the door, you definitely don’t want to see his face, not right now, it'd be too painful.

“If we pull this thing off, and get everyone back,” Tony pauses. “Tell [Y/N] I left something in her room, yeah?”

Then he does the secret rhythm to a clap only the both of you memorized and knew.

You assume he’s done, since you don’t hear his voice anymore after that. Everyone goes out of the house and you hold Morgan’s hand as all of you walk to the lake for one last goodbye.

After that you talked to everybody who came for a while. Bruce, Steve, Clint and Thor tried to get you to look at the bright side, which you appreciated, you met the rest of the guardians who came, Doctor Strange who gave you a sympathetic look and apologized for your loss, and the guy you remembered Tony told you about, the one who helped him when his suit powered down and got stranded years ago. You made a mental note to ask him to hang out with you and Peter sometime.

“Hey... I’m heading to bed now,” you inform Pepper, Happy and Rhodey (both men were staying at the cabin for a few days) who're in the living room staring at the fireplace.

Before you go to your own room you check up on Morgan, who’s fast asleep. She's wearing her little Iron Man glove, pressed to her chest. She doesn’t deserve this.

Your room is still unpacked and they just sort of removed your bed from the compound and moved it here. You sit on the bed, already thinking of ways to move on that you know wouldn’t work anyway.

You remember your father claimed he had something for you here, so taking a deep breath, you clap the secret rhythm,

“Dad... you’ve gotta be kidding me,” you whine, covering your face with both palms.

Another hologram.

“Hey legacy,” Tony chuckles, looking at you. You shake your head at the ridiculous nickname, also avoiding his eyes, which you’re sure would make you cry if you did look. “I... uh, this is just a little video. For you. Sure you won’t see this but... I like to pretend I could still talk to you. I miss you, a lot.”

You fiddle with your hands, still not looking at him but you listen to him talk.

“But we’ll see. We’ll figure something out. I hope to see you soon, [Y/N]. I love you.”

He has both hands in his pockets as he looked at you with a warm smile, before disappearing.

But he reappears a second after.

“We’re doing it tomorrow. The... uh, time travel thing.”

The stress in his voice make you look up at him, but this time he isn’t looking at you. It seems like he was pacing while he recorded it.

“I just finished doing one of these for, well, in case I somehow die while we attempt to do it. If you think about it, it’s highly likely. Going back in time, yada yada, possibilities are endless,” he sighs. “But I figured I owe my firstborn a final message if that happens, right?”

“Honestly I feel,” he makes motions with his hands. “Bit anxious... right now. We were the only ones helping each other out when one of us felt this way but... seeing as you’re not here, I just have to deal with it.”

“[Y/N], look at me,” Tony crouches down to be in level with you, like he knew you were actually here watching this, like he was actually there, the one talking to you. But it’s how he programmed it. “You wanna know what my best decision in life was?”

“Yeah?”

“Taking you in,” he smiles. “When we fight you always bring up that I had the choice not to, and you were right. But guess what? I have no regrets.”

You smile, blinking back tears.

“You mean the world to me, I just feel like I don’t say it enough,” Tony cocks his head slightly, still looking at you. “We both have no idea what the afterlife’s like but that won’t matter, I’ll always look after you girls.”

“Speaking of which, your sister reminded me so much of you when she was first born, god, I still wish you were around for that. I know you’ll love her, she’s just brilliant. Take care of her for me, yeah?”

“Maybe there’s a way to get you back,” Tony sighs at your words, already knowing that it’s not going to work out. “I - I just need some time. I can bring you back, Dad-”

He places a hand on your shoulder. You couldn’t feel it, but you did feel a light breeze. “The deed’s already done, honey. Don’t worry about me. Come on, don’t cry,” he kneels in front of you as you let yourself go, crying hard into your palms.

Don't say everything's meant to be, Cause you know it's not what I believe Can't help but think that it should've been me In the end, I just wish you were here.

You open your eyes when you hear a beep, even Tony turns around. The recording had ten seconds left. “The recording’s about to end, [Y/N],”

“I love you tons,” you whisper, looking up at him.

Tony smiles, caressing your cheek. “I love you 3,000.”

Yeah, they say you're in a better place, Either way I still wish you were here ‘Cause they say you're in a better place In the end, I just wish you were here.

----

so here’s part 2. I miss him y’all, it’s missing-Tony-so-much hours for me

just like the first part, I got the title from this amazing song by Neck Deep which you can listen to here.

[taglist: @creation-magician (which I would like to personally thank for wanting to be tagged)]

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falcqns · 3 years

Text

Kiwi

Pairing: Henry Cavill x Reader

Summary: Direct sequel to Medicine, spread out over a few months.

Warnings: smut, angst, mentions of childbirth and pregnancy

A/N: Hope you enjoy!

Kiwi

She worked her way through a cheap pack of cigarettes Hard liquor mixed with a bit of intellect

You woke up the next morning to the feeling of Henry trailing kisses along your neck. You moaned slightly at the feeling before rolling over to face him.

“Good morning,” You whispered, and he smiled at your tiredness.

“Good morning, angel,”

You snuggled in to him closer, relishing in his warmth.

He smiled, and pressed a kiss to your shoulder. “I’ve been wanting that for so long,” He said.

You giggled. “Me too. I just got tired of watching you be flirted with, and you unconsciously flirting back.”

Henry chuckled once more before pulling the blanket off of your body, and climbing on top of you once more.

“Mmm, well,” He started. “I thought that you didn't like me like that so I had direct my feelings somewhere,”

You giggled, and kissed him. “I’m glad I made a move, then,”

Henry broke out into a smile.

“Me too, my love. Now, I am starving, as I am sure you are, so let’s go get food.”

And all the boys, they were saying they were into it Such a pretty face, on a pretty neck

“Kal, you gotta stop bugging me buddy, I’m trying to make dinner for your daddy, who should be home any minute,” You said, glancing between the very excited Akita and the clock.

Henry had been on set all day filming, and since your next film hadn’t started pre production yet, you didn’t have anything to do.

Instead, you had taken up babysitting Kal whenever Henry couldn't bring him to set.

It was a Friday, and wanted to cook Henry a nice meal, but was having trouble due to Kal wanting to be involved in everything you were doing, even if it meant following you to the bathroom.

You managed to plate the chicken parm and veggies just when Henry entered the kitchen.

“Hey baby,” He said, before pulling you into his arms. You immediately wrapped your arms around him, and embraced him tightly.

“Hey, how was filming?” You asked, handing him his plate before walking into the dining room with yours in hand.

The two of you sat at the table, and Henry told you about his day.

As soon as the dinner dishes were cleared away, you were hauled up and over Henrys shoulder.

“Henry, what are you doing?” You asked, while trying to free yourself from his grasp.

“What? It’s dessert time!”

She's driving me crazy, but I'm into it, but I'm into it I'm kind of into it

“You should just ask him already!” Freya said. You were on FaceTime, during Christmas, and your conversation had quickly turned to talking about Henry.

“I don't think he’s even looking for anything serious, so why should he care if I go out with another guy?” You said, while opening a fruit snack for your little brother.

“Well, he shouldn't, but he’s pretty serious about you, Y/N,” She answered.

You watched as your brother walked away from you, back to his tablet to play Roblox while you thought of what to say.

“I’m serious about him too, we’ve just never actually had the talk about what we are, and I don't know how to approach something like that with him,” You reasoned.

“Well, I would do it soon, because Lucy is starting on set next week, so I’d bag that man while you still have the chance,”

“Yeah, you're right. I’ll talk to him.” You resolved, and Freya cheered.

“Thank god because if I had to deal with Lucy fawning over him again for a whole year I’d pull a Calanthe,”

it's getting crazy, I think I'm losing it, I think I'm losing it Oh, I think she said "I'm having your baby, it's none of your business"

You were fucked. Royally fucked.

You were pregnant. Specifically, with Henry’s baby.

You two weren't even dating, and you were going to have his child. You understood now why Kal was being so stubborn, and wanting to be with you 24/7. He knew you were pregnant, and was trying to protect you.

You were going to set today, to surprise him, so you decided to tell him.

You didn't know how he would react, but you were hoping it would be good, so you went out and bought a Superman onesie, and put it in a gift bag with the sonogram and one of the many pregnancy tests you had taken.

You were excited to tell him, but that excitement died down when you had gotten to set, and entered Henry’s trailer. He was sat on the couch, with Lucy beside him.

The two of them were sitting very close, and was laughing about something.

Henry’s eyes widened immediately when he saw you enter his trailer.

“B-baby, what are you doing here?” He stuttered.

“Well,” You said, anger bubbling up inside you. “I was coming to surprise you, but obviously you're busy, so I’ll just leave,” You said. You placed the gift bag on the table next to you and stormed out.

“Fuck,” He said, when you slammed his trailer door shut.

Lucy cleared her throat. “Well, I’m just gonna go,” She said.

“I didn't realize you had a girlfriend, I’m so sorry,”

Henry shook his head. “She’s not my girlfriend, yet anyways, but it’s okay. You didn't know.”

They two of them said goodbye, and Lucy headed out. His eyes drifted over to the gift you had brought him.

He grabbed the small bag, and opened it. He pulled out the onesie and his heart dropped.

You were coming to tell him he was going to be a father, and he broke your heart.

He pulled the sonogram out of the bag, and sat back down on the couch, tears escaping his blue eyes as he stared down at the pictures of his baby.

It's New York, baby, always jacked up Holland Tunnel for a nose, it's always backed up

He put the sonogram and the onesie back in the bag, and grabbed his car keys.

He needed to see you, and make sure you were okay.

He ran out of his trailer, and off set, only stopping to let Lauren know what happened and where he was going.

He sped to your apartment, where he knew you'd gone.

He hopped out of the car, and raced to your apartment door, the bag still in tow.

A loud pounding came on the door, and you managed to muster enough strength to get out of bed and pull yourself to the door.

The second you opened the door, you saw a large black wall come right at your face, and before you knew it, you were wrapped up in the warmth and scent of Henry.

“I am so, so sorry,” He sobbed out into your shoulder. “Please, baby. Please believe me,”

Your hands came around his waist, and you began to cry again.

“I’m sorry too.”

He immediately pulled back and looked you in the eyes. “Don't. Don’t apologize. I should have asked you that morning to be my girlfriend and I didn't. Now you're pregnant, with my baby, and I just broke your heart.”

You looked up at him once more. “I just want you to be happy. If you're happier with her, I understand. I don't expect you to be involved if you don't want to.”

He didn't say anything, but shut the door, scooped you up, and carried you over to the couch.

He sat down with you on his lap. He hiked your shirt up, and laid his hand on your slightly bloated stomach.

“I only have eyes for you, and I want to be involved. I mean, you know how much I want kids.” He said, his eyes not leaving your stomach. “Please, be mine,” He begged, finally meeting your eyes.

You smiled. “Of course, I’ll be your girlfriend,” You whispered, before pressing a kiss to his lips.

He shook his head when you pulled back. “N-no. I want you to be my wife.”

Your eyes widened, but a smile spread across your face.

“Yes, of course.”

When she's alone, she goes home to a cactus In a black dress, she's such an actress

Your hands were played on Henry’s chest for support, your diamond wedding ring sparkling in the daylight. He had one hand on your hip, and the other over the small bump that had begun to show while you rocked yourself over his hard cock.

“Fuck, you feel so good, baby,” Henry groaned. He was absolutely loving your changing hormones, especially right now, as it meant you were alway horny for him.

“Mmm,” You whimpered out, your hips moving even faster above him as you felt your orgasm approaching.

“Such a pretty baby,” Henry cooed at you, spurring you on. “Making me feel so so good,”

You cried out as your orgasm surged through you. Your back arched, legs trembled, and your walls squeezed Henry.

You felt Henry grip your hips even harder, and flipped you onto your back. He braced his arms on either side on either side of your head, before drilling his cock into you intently.

“Fuck, baby,” He murmured as he dropped his head to your neck, and trailing kisses down your neck. “Wanna keep you like this all the time baby, so full of my baby,”

You groaned out, and wrapped your arms around his neck to pull him down for kisses.

“C’mon, baby, I know you're close,” You breathed in his ear, and he was sent over the edge. He pushed all the way in, and shuddered as the waves of pleasure washed over him.

He pulled out of you, and rolled onto his side.

He pulled you close to him, and placed his hand on your belly.

“5 more months,” You whispered in your ear, and he smiled.

She sits beside me like a silhouette Hard candy dripping on me 'til my feet are wet And now she's all over me, it's like I paid for it (cha-ching) It's like I paid for it, I'm gonna pay for this

Henry knew from the moment that your daughter entered the world, that he had, 100%, made the right decision by taking you home a year ago.

It had been a long journey to get here, but he had a wonderful wife, and a beautiful little girl named Cirilla, and that’s all he could ever have asked for.

#henry cavill #henry cavill smut #henry!holmes #thewitcher #geralt of rivia

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zsbrainrot · 4 months

Text

Kazuki would buy the I am Kenough Hoodie and wear it all the time. Rei would tease him but then proceed to steal it on a regular basis.

Happy Buddy Daddies Friday!

(Pose inspo for Rei under the cut)

#this literally came to me in a dream this week #I woke up and manically drew both of them #I have no idea why the voices just told me to make it happen #anyway happy buddy daddies friday!#kazurei #buddy daddies #my art #buddy daddies fanart #reikazu #kazurei fanart #rei suwa #buddy daddies Friday #zsart

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elisaphoenix13 · 3 years

Text

Once Upon A Summer (Ch.6)

Peter was content to sit on the wet sand and build sand castles. Or more like sand piles since beach toys we're not on Friday's "necessary supplies for temporary toddlers". Which was fine. Stephen offered to take a gateway to the store to buy some if it was necessary, but so far, it seemed it wasn't. While he built sandcastles, they relaxed in the cabana with one eye on Peter at all times. Two if they counted the one eye from both of them.

"Pete, you don't go any closer to the water." Tony calls out and gets an affirmative from the toddler. When he looks over at the sorcerer sitting on one of the cabana beds, he chuckles when he finds him applying sunscreen. "Got enough there?"

Stephen huffs. "Probably not. Even under here, the sun will find me and burn me if I'm not careful."

"Burn like a lobster?" Tony asks.

"Not everyone is blessed with skin that welcomes UV rays. I'm sure if you sit out in the sun unprotected, you just get a nice tan." Stephen says as he holds the sunscreen out to Tony. "Could you help me with my back?"

"You'll take any excuse to have me touch you won't you? You really just have to ask~" Tony smirks and Stephen chucks the sunscreen at him before he can grab it.

Tony chuckles as he bends over to pick it up, then sits near Stephen to help apply the cream to his back. The sorcerer took the responsibility of watching Peter in the meantime, giving Tony time to appreciate the skin under his hands. To appreciate Stephen in general. Over the past few days, Tony started to notice little things about him, but the biggest of them all was the loneliness he seemed to catch in Stephen's eyes. Just yesterday, Tony asked him if he was the only one that was living in the Sanctum but the sorcerer had told him that there was another man there. Who was currently watching the Sanctum until this mishap with Peter was resolved.

Something told Tony that this other sorcerer wasn't the greatest company...at least in the way of conversation. When Tony saw him at the beginning of this whole ordeal, Stephen had been terse and closed off. But over the past few days, his stress was starting to melt away and Tony was seeing the doctor relaxed and (hopefully) even enjoying himself. Even with their situation.

"Hey Doc." Tony starts.

"Hmm?"

"You're welcome to come here or to the tower even after the kid is back to normal." He says. "I'll tell Friday to give you clearance."

Stephen looks over at him. "...why?"

Tony finishes applying the sunscreen and closes the cap. "I'll admit that having you around has been a breath of fresh air. It's fun when someone can actually quip back...and...you also look like you could use the company. Or a periodic trip to the beach."

"You realize I can go anywhere in the world I want?" Stephen points out and Tony sighs.

"It was just an offer."

He wouldn't admit how disheartening it was to be brushed off like that, but it was probably just karma. Tony wasn't innocent of doing that to other people from time to time. He just didn't understand why Stephen and his well being was getting under his skin like this. Sure the younger man was very nice to look at, and Tony did enjoy their banter and his one sided flirting-

Wait.

Was Tony…? Nope. Impossible.

"Thank you." Stephen suddenly says quietly, pulling Tony from his thoughts. "Maybe I will."

There was that butterfly feeling. His chest fluttered and Tony couldn't help but smile. Maybe this was what he thought it was after all? He'd heard people explain the feeling...but he was just flirting with Stephen to get a rise out of him and because it was fun.

...right?

He honestly didn't know anymore. It started out that way at least. Stephen was more than nice to look out so his flirting was actually a little genuine, but it felt different from how he flirted with others. He actually wanted to do anything he could to keep Stephen happy, and he had been pleasantly surprised when the sorcerer accepted his invitation to take a small vacation in his rebuilt Malibu mansion. This domestic environment they had was...Tony couldn't even explain it. But he knew he liked it. He knew that he wouldn't complain if it lasted forever.

"Daddy! Look!" Peter calls out and Tony looks over at his sandcastle with a grin. It was more of a pile of sand but the toddler looked pleased with his work and Tony wasn't going to ruin that for him.

"Look at that Pete! How about we find some shells to decorate it?" He says as he gets up from the cabana bed he's sitting on to walk over to the boy.

"Shells?" Peter asks curiously with a cute tilt to his head.

"Yup. Come on." Tony holds out his hand and helps Peter to his feet.

The two spend the next ten minutes looking for the perfect shells to decorate Peter's sand pile and the boy even picks some to take home. Tony couldn't say no when he saw the pure delight on his kid's face so each hand held shells for either the sandcastle or to take home. Watching Peter decide what to do with the newest shell he found was adorable. He'd pick up a shell, turn to Tony, then look between each of his hands before making his decision and carefully placing it.

"Alright buddy. I don't think I can hold anymore. How about we go decorate your castle then go eat?" Tony suggests.

"Kay!" Peter scurries back to his sandcastle and takes a shell one at a time from Tony's hand after the man sits down, decorating his sandpile just the way he wanted. "All done!" He says after a little bit with a big smile.

"Looks great Pete."

"How about some lunch?" Stephen calls from the cabana.

"Turkey sammich!" Peter giggles and gets up to run over to the cabana, leaving Tony to get up with one of his hands still full of shells and brush himself off.

As Tony walked over to join them, he watched as Stephen got Peter settled at the low table with his sandwich, cut up into triangles as requested, and a juice box. Well he tried with the juice box anyway. The sorcerer's hands shook a little too much for him to put the straw in so Tony silently took the juice after setting the shells aside safely. Fortunately, Stephen nodded in acceptance and didn't take offense to the help Tony offered. Either he knew Tony was just trying to help, or he knew it was important to get the toddler his juice. Maybe both.

"Thank you." Peter says politely when Tony hands him his juice box and takes a sip before putting it down to bite into his sandwich.

"You're welcome. Did you say thank you to Mom?" Tony asks, ignoring Stephen's sigh.

Peter's eyes widen and he looks at Stephen. "Thank you!"

"You're welcome." The sorcerer chuckles.

"Thanks for making lunch." Tony says as he takes his tuna sandwich from Stephen.

"Don't get used to it."

Tony laughs. "It was nice while it lasted I guess. Maybe I'll make you and Peter my mom's lasagna."

"You cook?" Stephen asks in surprise as he and Tony join Peter at the table.

"Every once in a blue moon. I'm honestly only good with pasta, sauce, and sandwiches." Tony admits. "And whatever I can nuke in the microwave. What about you?"

"Quite well actually. Just don't ask me to make anything too extravagant."

"No beef wellington. Noted."

Stephen chuckles and they enjoy their lunch while enjoying the warm weather, the gentle breeze, and the sounds of the waves crashing. Peter was too busy eating to fill the remaining silence with his usual chatter, but Tony took that as a win. Toddlers were notorious for picking at their food and talking a mile a minute. Peter finished his food without a fuss and even let Tony wipe his face and hands with a napkin before he got too sticky from the juice.

"Play?" Peter asks.

"For a little while longer. Then we'll go back home and wash your shells, okay?" Tony says. "Stay where we can see you and stay away from the water until one of us can take you."

"Kay!" Peter wanders away and Stephen pops the last of his own sandwich in his mouth and gets up to clean their mess.

"Either we're lucky or he's always been a good kid." The sorcerer says.

Tony shrugs. "Honestly? I wouldn't question it if May told me he was an angel from the moment he was born. Peter is a good kid. He has gotten into trouble once or twice recently but he meant well."

Trouble that Tony was pretty sure shaved ten years off of his life. The whole ordeal with Vulture? Peter ended up telling him what had happened and Tony felt sick to his stomach when he got to the part where Vulture dropped an entire building on Peter. Who even does that? Dropping a building on a kid has to weigh on one's mind, especially if you're a parent yourself (according to what Peter told him). What made it even worse was that Peter was in his sweatsuit and completely unprotected because Tony had taken away his suit. He still felt guilty for that. He took away his kid's suit and Peter still put himself into danger just to keep the villain of the week from stealing extremely expensive and dangerous equipment.

Peter had a good heart. The kid was completely selfless and was always looking out for others…

When May died, he had said that Tony didn't need to worry about him. That he would be okay.

Tony knew better. He knew Peter well enough that he knew the kid was terrified and on the brink of a meltdown. His eyes always betrayed how he was feeling and they were what made the engineer pull him into a hug. It was an attempt to comfort the teen, his kid, and Tony made sure to tell Peter that he wasn't abandoning him. Even Tony had to admit to himself that he would go through hell and high water to see Peter happy and safe.

"He has a certain charm." Stephen says.

Tony barks out an abrupt laugh. "That's for sure. He's like a golden retriever puppy. Cute and excitable. Can't sit still and always seems to be around. When you meet him at his proper age, you'll want to pet his head."

"I believe you." Stephen chuckles. "You better go let the puppy play in the water though. He's been looking at it since before lunch."

"Alright, alright."

Tony gets up and walks over to Peter who was drawing pictures in the wet sand with a stick, and offers to let him play in the water. Peter agrees immediately and takes his hand, and they spend the next hour jumping over the waves as they roll in and splashing around on the shore. One of the waves did catch Peter and knocked him down, but Tony swiftly pulled him up to his feet again, made sure he was okay, and they went back to playing. The engineer eventually found himself chasing Peter along the shore, threatening the boy with clawed hands and listening to Peter shriek as he ran away laughing.

Tony loved it. He liked hearing Peter laugh because the poor kid had enough bad things happen in his life. It always blew his mind how Peter managed to keep his pure heart and kindness when he was dealt such a crappy hand. Tony vowed to keep the smile on his face however he could.

Even chasing his toddler form around the beach and eventually catching him and scooping him up.

"Gotcha!" Tony exclaims and Peter giggles. "How does going home and washing your shells sound? Dad's pooped."

"Mama too?" Peter asks as he wraps his arms and legs around the engineer.

"Yeah. Mom, too." Tony confirms.

"Okay Daddy."

Tony smiles when Peter lays his head on his shoulder and the man walks over to the cabana. "Ready to head back?"

"Yeah." Stephen grabs the cooler and follows Tony to the path that would take them back to the mansion.

Two minutes into their five minute walk, Peter fell asleep against Tony's shoulder and Stephen quietly informed him of it. So the new plan was to clean the boy up and tuck him into bed. Which, of course, went well enough. Stephen helped Tony rinse Peter free of sand when they got back to the mansion, and while the engineer got him into a diaper, Stephen went into the bedroom to get his bed ready. Peter was barely conscious throughout the whole ordeal and dropped back off into sleep once Tony carried him to bed and tucked him in. Tony laid a gentle kiss on his forehead as Stephen left the room, and when he followed to join the sorcerer, he found the younger man looking at his shoulders and then rolled his eyes.

"You didn't put sunscreen on." Stephen says.

Tony looks at his shoulders and winces when he finds patches of angry red. He didn't even want to imagine what his back looked like. "Yikes."

"Come on. I'll help you put some aloe on it." Stephen says and walks downstairs to grab the aloe gel.

He was certainly two steps ahead because Tony didn't have any of that either. Stephen must have ordered it with the other beach stuff.

"Thanks, Doc." Tony says as he sits at the kitchen table and Stephen walks up behind him.

"Does it hurt?"

"Not right now. I'm sure it will soon now that I'm aware of it." Tony snorts.

Stephen nods and begins the task of applying the aloe gel to the affected areas of Tony's upper body and the man sighs. The gel was cool and soothing, and he definitely enjoyed having it applied by Stephen. He was already content enough to close his eyes and hum contently...but not enough to make the sorcerer uncomfortable. Though he was sure Stephen was aware how much of an effect aloe had on sunburns and wouldn't have judged him.

Unless Tony was openly moaning. That was over the line and inappropriate and he wouldn't. At least not when he wasn't in a relationship. If they were, that was a different story.

Tony's cell suddenly breaks the content atmosphere and he huffs before reaching over to grab it from the other side of the table. "Yeah?" He answers once he brings the phone up to his ear.

"Tony, I've got the results for the...test." Bruce says and Tony straightens.

"Already?"

"Is that Bruce?" Stephen asks as he finishes and walks away to put the aloe in the fridge.

"Yeah." Tony nods when Stephen turns to look at him. "So is Strange living up to his name or-"

"It's a match, Tony." Bruce interrupts.

Tony chokes and his eyes widen. For once he was at a loss for words and his tongue felt heavy. He barely heard Bruce's next words because he was pretty sure he stopped breathing.

"You're Peter's biological father."

#stephen strange #ironstrange #tony stark #peter parker #supremefamily

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boop-le-snoot · 4 years

Text

PARTY FAVOURS I CHAPTER 9

As promised, two chapters in one day! HBD to this trash rabbit. I just get thirstier with age.

Rating: Explicit.

‼️TW: Reader is EIGHTEEN! Recreational drug use, smoking and alcohol consumption, deeply internalised self-loathing, very questionable moral standards. Daddy kink taken half-seriously. BDSM themes in later chapters - explicit content will come with it's own TWs. FIRST PERSON POV. DRUG USE IN THIS CHAPTER. Just generally an uncomfortable vibe, thread carefully.

Summary: You're Peter's classmate, a child of rich and famous but uncaring parents. Getting paired up for a lengthy project with the boy was an interesting turn of events and you don't know whether to feel blessed or cursed when you develop, seemingly, a perfectly normal, harmless crush on Tony Stark. Fueled by feelings of inadequacy and boredom, your life spirals out of control - and you're lucky your newfound friends are there to pick up the pieces even if you cannot find it in yourself to believe these amazing human (and not so human) beings voluntarily give you more than a fleeting glance and an offhanded thought. And they brought cake!

A/N: Ooh, boy. This is a whole mess. Angst. [insert drugs owl meme]. Steve doesn't pass the vibe check yet again, stupid old man. Bruce + Tony be like: I CAN'T GET NO SLEEP CUZ OF Y'ALL.

My beta, whomst I love more than cake - @miscmarvelwritings . She's so beautiful though. And so smart. Wow.

The strobe lights pulsated to the rhythm of the music, bodies swaying, gyrating to the tune. The club was banging this time of night, people were living it up like there was no tomorrow. For me, in the VIP zone it was quieter, calmer, but no less exciting. The atmosphere here was distinctly different from the one on the main floor.

It was hard to wallow in misery even if it only took me an hour to stop resisting the gratuitous amounts of white powder on the silver platters. "It's better when you're there to watch them, they'll do it anyway but at least you can know that they're getting the good stuff!" My idiot father proudly announced, looking at me snorting a line through a rolled up hundred dollar bill.

Whiskey and vodka wasn't doing it for me. It made me feel low and Dad, being Dad, of course noticed it and immediately called a guy who knew a guy and suddenly all of his friends and their baby-faced companions had white under their noses. Cash flew like autumn leaves.

As I went out to the main dance floor to get a closer look at Billie Eilish in all of her edgy, beautiful self, the drug hit me like an avalanche. No trace of the grogginess or the mortification that had hitched a ride on me from Stark tower. I danced and sang and saw dad smiling at me in approval, his equally high and important friends all wearing identically predatory smirks. They were good at spotting the obvious - beauty, talent, money. I had no qualms about the fact that dad was off bragging about my close relationship with Tony. If my father was feeling particularly bold, he'd be telling them he knew and encouraged it all along, his buddies pretending to believe the white lie in turn.

I had exchanged my pants and sneakers in favour of a skirt and fishnets with high heels combo, a decidedly inappropriate attire for a daughter having a family night with her father but he insisted I dress trendy. I loved my dad, I really did, and I knew he meant well - I'd definitely be out of place amongst these TVscreen worthy people in my jeans and sneakers but...Tony was one of those people, and he had never ever said anything bad about the way I dress. Even when I obviously and purposely put on obscene clothing just to get a rise out of someone.Tony just smiled and played along.

Tony Stark was the heartless asshole here? Really, press? Really, haters?

"Standing there, killing time, can't commit to anything but a crime..." I sang along quietly as I hurried back to the VIP area. My dad was standing up and so were a couple of his buddies. "Where's ya goin'?" I asked, taking a seat.

"Be right back baby girl, if you find better company then go on without us," Dad winked, throwing a totally nasty glance at one of the girls. She was not much older than me but her body was stick thin and bolt-ons and Botox were her two best friends. She gave me a dirty look and I returned it, extending a waiting hand towards my dad. He chuckled, depositing a neatly rolled stack of hundreds into my palm.

"Dad, I want a new purse," I whined, just a tad. Just to see the girl's eyes go wide with acrid envy. Dutifully, another couple of stacks landed in my palm without any objections and the company retreated towards the back door.

I sighed.

Fiddled with the straw of my drink a bit, contemplating my options. I could always ditch this party and go somewhere more active, somewhere with better music and kinder people.

"Ay, baby girl, you wanna party with us?" A tall, handsome man from dad's previous company approached me. "We'll have some fun." He maintained a respectful distance but the intentions were clear.

"Nope," I popped the sound, not even sparing him a glance. A few lines of cocaine stared at me from the table beckoning with a better high, a stronger sense of euphoria, confidence and energy to dance, to sing, to be happy. I picked up one of the discarded banknotes, quickly rolling it by a sheer force of habit and cleaning up the tray. One line.

"Holy shit, is that..."

Two lines.

"The fuck?!" I recognised that voice. I have been hearing it every day in the labs, I've been hearing it in my dreams.

Tony was gaping at me, in front of me.

"Hey, Tony. Fancy seeing you here." Any other time, I'd be cringing at my lame greeting but I was feeling way too good to care about trivial things like being clever or being appropriate.

"I was looking...for you," He slowly said, putting a single finger on the tray with the last line of coke and pulling it out of my reach.

"That's funny," I snorted, hastily wiping at my nose to cover the tracks of my very bad, very immoral, very illegal activities.

"It's not, Princess, it's not funny at all," He frowned. "C'mon, we're leaving." And extended his hand. I decided to follow along - there was nothing for me to do at this club anyway, the music was lame and the people were stuck-up.

"I look like a prostitute, Tony, I'll take the back door," I attempted to pull him towards the aforementioned but he didn't budge, just stared straight ahead and towed me along like he was wearing one of his iron suits under the stylish jeans and tee get-up.

He stopped in front of the exit, giving me a critical once over. Wiped my face, again, brushed my hair back. Gave me his shades - I dutifully put them on, figuring the manic look in my eyes was anything but attractive right now. "Jesus Christ, Princess," He sounded desperate. "You're beautiful, don't you fucking worry."

And we made our exit, arm in arm, me trying not to stumble in my high heels, Tony being my rock, my solid foundation. In other words, I was hanging onto him for dear life trying not to fall over and give a reason for a sneaking paparazzi to make a scandalous headline.

"You're doing great, Princess," Tony helped me into his Tesla, slamming the door behind me and hurrying towards the driver's door. I managed to unclasp and kick off my shoes, curling up comfortably into the passenger's seat.

I watched the man as he started the engine and watched him wrestle with whatever personal demons that tormented him as he peeled off and raced into the Friday night city.

"What in the everlasting fuck..." He started, stopping abruptly mid-sentence. "How did you even get in there?"

"I came with dad. He literally ditched me to fuck some whore, like, twenty minutes before you showed up." I shrugged, eyeing the modified panel of the car. It was very obviously Tony's own design. I wondered if he could introduce me to Elon Musk someday.

"What the fuck? And correct me if I didn't hear you clearly," Tony pinched the bridge of his nose. "Your father took it upon himself to drag you to a club, get you drunk, gave you cocaine and fucked off with some groupies?"

"Yah, that's about it. My dad is all about cocaine and whores, the more the better," I replied, leaning in to take a closer look at the car's panel. "Hey, could, like, introduce me to Elon Musk someday? That would be fuckin' awesome."

Tony went eerily quiet, I saw his knuckles on the steering wheel go white. Vague expletives were muttered under his breath. "I'm guessing you're good on sleep?" He finally asked through gritted teeth.

"Sleep? Don't know her," I laughed. "I wanna dance, Tony."

"Of course you do, Princess." His smile was tired and forced and full of pity. "You know, I don't think I'll be able to sleep now, either," He admitted, taking a sharp left. "How about we get some McDonald's and camp out in my lab?"

"Sure, whatever," Not like I had much choice in the matter. What I really craved was a good, long, hard fuck (by Tony himself preferably) but if science calls... I have no choice but to comply. "Get me two Big Macs," I demanded least he try to joke and get me a Happy Meal or some shit.

He did get me the food without any usual grumbling. I didn't like this Tony. Tired Tony, sad Tony, angry Tony. Wrong Tony.

"Huh?" He said and I realized I'd said the last part out loud.

"I don't like a sad Tony,” I said. "It's the wrong kind. Sassy, snarky and perpetually caffeinated Tony is the best Tony. The only proper kind, in fact." I stated with seriousness, shoes dangling from one hand and my McDonald's in the other. Man, I have been seeing more and more of this god-damned elevator recently.

"You're high as a kite, darling," He chuckled then, a real laugh.

"Who's high?" Bruce's voice came from the kitchen.

In a state of blind panic, I jumped behind Tony. "Not me."

Tony palmed his face.

Steve came over from the fridge, leaving the rummaging to Bucky. He took one look at me and suddenly I felt small, insignificant like an ant. I didn't like it much. "Holy hell, the fuck happened? Tony, explain." The Captain demanded, giving me the world's biggest stink eye.

"It's her piece of shit of a father, dragged her off to some night club and left her hanging with his buddies, fucking off god knows where. It's not her fault so lay the fuck off, Rogers, with your self-righteousness," Tony exploded all over Steve, the pent up frustration rearing it's ugly head.

I mustered enough courage to tiptoe around the dick measuring contest to sit at the counter. My appetite was gone and my burgers were turning colder and soggier with every passing second. Just like my life.

"Hey, Princess," Bruce's gentle voice halted my train of thought. He approached me carefully, ignoring the men behind me in favour of simply wrapping me up in a quiet, comfortable hug. "You feel alright? Want some water?"

"Nu-uh," I mumbled, unwilling to part ways with the warmth of this embrace.

"... Steve, I found her snorting miles of coke all by herself while an some jackass was waiting for her to be even more out of it. It's rare that I say this but I had literally zero words." Tony punctuated his words by tapping his fist against the wall multiple times.

Bruce tightened his hold on me, a sudden influx of strength accompanied by a quiet, low growl in his throat.

I felt the sudden need to clarify the situation. "Tony, chill. It takes me a lot more to be out of it, I'm fucking coherent and I'm talking sensibly. It's not my first rodeo."

Apparently I'd gone and said the wrong thing because all the men in the room were suddenly growling. I even totally forgot about Bucky who had the uncanny ability to exist in a room without making absolutely any sort of noise.

"The fuck do you even mean by that, Princess?" Tony screeched, probably already knowing that answer.

"From one rich kid to another, you should damn well fuckin' know," I spat, unwilling to admit my misery.

He sighed, audibly deflating behind me. I refused to listen to him, refused to be humiliated and exposed like that for my perfectly human desire to be happy. To not be a disappointment, to not be disappointed in everything and everyone. Bruce was nice and kind and warm and selfless but even he couldn't love me the way I wanted to be loved. Cherished, taken care of. All that mushy stuff. I was selfish, so I snuggled in closer to him, muting the world around me, replacing it with the smell and feel of him.

Cocaine made it a whole lot easier to imagine. Maybe that's why it was so addictive.

"Guys, calm down, you're stressing everyone out," Bruce rumbled quietly. I loved the way his deep voice seemed to reverb throughout his chest.

"Get me a cup of coffee, would you, Buckaroo?" Tony sighed again. I heard the sound of him slurping at his coffee. I heard Bucky's metal arm clunk against something equally metallic before the supersoldiers bid everyone good night and walked off.

Only then I removed my face from Bruce enough to take a good look at Tony. He was eyeing me, too.

"We have a caffeinated Tony," I said, softly. "Now we just need some science to have a happy Tony."

He smiled but it came out watery. He wanted to say something but choked on his words. "C'mere," He finally said, turning in his chair and opening his arms.

I unashamedly made grabby hands, the universal gesture for ‘I want, gimme’, and Bruce delightfully deposited me into Tony's waiting arms. It was like my birthday and Christmas came out all at once. Tony's embrace was warm, like Bruce's, but tinted with an unexpected familiarity. He smelled like motor oil and fancy cologne. It was heavenly.

"You keeping tabs on me, huh? Coffee, science and sass? That's your recipe for happiness?" The engineer asked me, a seriousness that didn't match the joking tone of the conversation at all.

"I think I got you figured out. Peter, too, is important for happiness. But in controlled amounts," I said, giving it a careful thought.

Tony chuckled, sounding a little bit shocked. "What about you?" He said after a brief moment of silence passed, interrupted only by Bruce's tea kettle coming to a slow boil.

"I don't think you need me for happiness," I said, meaning it. "But let's be honest, I'm a nice addition."

He stilled under me, briefly. Bruce cleared his throat.

"Brucie needs me, I think. He's lonely," I told Tony with a sudden influx of desire to be completely honest and 100% transparent. "And it makes me happy, because I need Bruce too. He's the best," I finished.

"Is that so?" Tony sounded vaguely tearful so I attempted to pull back to take a good look at his face. He didn't let me though, gently but firmly pressing my face back into his chest. "And me?"

"I do need you, Tones," I admitted without spilling any unnecessary details.

There was a child within me, small and scared and lonely, like Bruce. I hated her, hated being so soft and needy when everybody else obviously (and understandably) was busy with figuring out their own lives. I wished, desperately so, to just boom-boom-whoosh her away like Doctor Strange magicked away unwanted visitors.

Tony said nothing but his hands betrayed him. They shook and they held onto the skimpy see-through fabric of my top like he was a drowning man and I was his only floatie. For the moment, I closed my eyes and let myself believe he needed me, too.

"I'll catch a wink or two, wake me up if you need something," Bruce broke the silence, having finished off his tea. I didn't notice the time pass so quickly, too lost somewhere between here and there and Tony. In short, I was being lovesick all over the billionaire.

"Bwucie," I leaned backwards, pushing until Tony caved and let me rest my back against the counter, elbows on top of it, legs dangling freely on the sides of his legs. It put a lot of me on display. Tony had called me beautiful earlier so none of my usual habits of being appropriate around the man concerned me. He thought I was pretty!

"Princess," Banner came over to wrap me in a hug that was quite awkward, considering the fact I was sitting on Tony. It took some maneuvering to get it right.

"Night night," I said the usual and got a brief kiss on the cheek before Bruce shuffled off, yawning.

Tony was watching us with an unreadable expression. As soon as I turned my head to look at his face instead, something in him changed. His eyes grew big and round, the crease between his eyebrows disappeared. The corners of his mouth tilted up.

On a sudden impulse, I reached over to run my palm gently over the neatly trimmed line of his beard, following from his chin to his jawline, to his soft tousled hair. His eyelashes shook, fluttered, as the engineer leaned into my touch with the grace of a cat. "Kiss him, kiss him" my brain chanted. I knew I was a coward, I wouldn't do that. "Pretty," I said instead, the word coming out in a whisper.

He gulped, audibly. "Princess, you have no idea..." Shaking his head, as if he was surrounded by a swarm of mosquitoes, Tony briefly looked away. "You have no idea what you're doing."

"Nope," I agreed solemnly. "But at least it feels good. It feels right."

"God," He frowned, one of his hands coming to nervously card through his hair. "Nothing about this is right."

My face fell. Just like I thought, Tony wanted exactly nothing to do with a clueless little teenager. It stung and tears pooled in the corners of my eyes where I stubbornly refused to let them escape and make me into a crybaby. "Whatever you say, Tony." I was ready to agree with anything he said, really, if he would just keet holding me like that.

"Don't," He raised a palm. "Don't close yourself off like that."

Now I was genuinely confused. What exactly did he expect from me? I shrugged.

"You're clever, brilliant and beautiful, you can and should do so much better than all of this," He vaguely gestured towards me, towards himself, towards us and the whole damn city.

I contemplated my answer, briefly. "A lot of people tell me what I should and shouldn't be doing. Don't I get a say?" The bitterness had fought its way out and won. "I just want to be happy for a bit. All the usual bullshit."

He looked taken aback, really. Like he hadn't even considered the option. Typical.

Meanwhile, I continued my word vomit. "I want someone to give a damn about what I want and what makes me happier. Until then, I have no other choice but to take care of myself the best way I know how. Like everybody else does," The weight of his arm landed on my waist, pulling me close to his chest yet again. I didn't resist. No fight left in me. The tiredness seeped deep in my bones, chilly.

The sudden change of altitude startled me. The engineer had picked me up and started walking off towards the elevator, directing it to the lab. His personal lab. The tiles felt cold under my feet where he put me down to make his own beeline for the bar. I would've joined if not the drug in my system - the last thing I wanted was to land in a hospital yet again.

I took the moment to browse my social media, untag myself from all the unflattering pictures, post my usual shitpost. A tiny skirt, equally tiny top and fishnets - I felt out of place in his lab although I've worn more outrageous things previously. I was raw, torn open, bleeding my misery all over the room. That was not in my plan, but then again, when did ever life go as you planned it?

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#party favours #bun writes #stephen strange x you #stephen strange x reader #Stephen Strange x y/n #bruce banner x you #bruce banner x y/n #bruce banner x reader #tony stark x y/n #tony stark x reader #tony stark x you

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celestialmark · 4 years

Text

Lacuna - Epilogue

- Characters: Johnny Suh x members of nct - Category: single parent au, fluff, slight angst - Word count: 6k - Warnings: - - Navigation: prologue | part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | epilogue - Author’s notes: hello I am so emotional because I can’t believe this is really the end of the series.. I initially wrote this for my dearest friend who’s so close to my heart, but somehow along the way, a lot of you followed, patiently waited and liked this story and I will always and forever be grateful to all of you. I’ve grown so attached to this series and knowing it’s the end now is making me so sad yet so happy at the same time. I really hope this epilogue makes up for all the angst we’ve all been through the past few chapters and that it meets all of your expectations. I love you all heaps and bunches and thank you for reading and staying with me throughout this series. happy reading my sweet! x

“Daddy’s home!” You say to Youngho excitedly when you hear the front door slide open with Johnny now possessing keys to your house.

Youngho immediately drops his pencil on the table, completely forgetting about his unfinished homework, hopping off the chair and racing towards the front door to see Johnny taking off his shoes by the hallway.

“Daddy!” Youngho exclaims, his voice rippling through the house.

“Hey buddy,” Johnny greets with a warm smile that reaches his eyes and lowers himself to meet Youngho’s outstreched arms for him. “How was school today?”

“Really good! My teacher said I draw really well,” Youngho brags proudly, standing tall when Johnny lets go of him.

Johnny grins and ruffles Youngho’s hair, “I’m so proud of you! Good job!” Letting his eyes scan the hallway, his natural instinct is to look for you. “Is mommy around?”

“Kitchen!” Youngho replies and walks off.

You emerge by the hallway then, arms crossed across your chest, a bashful smile on your lips as you watch Johnny tug at his tie to loosen it, still clad in his tux after being at work all day. He looked divine, to say the least, even when the stresses of the day has beaten him down to a pulp.

Johnny’s face lights up immediately when his eyes land on you, his shoulders drooping unknowingly, already feeling a thousand times calmer at the sight of you. “Hey you.” He opens his arms, the gaze in his eyes inviting you and you try so hard not to melt because this was your reality now.

“Hey,” you greet shyly, walking towards him and reaching upwards to circle your arms around his neck just as he wraps his around your waist, his embrace firm, burying his face into your shoulder.

“Missed you,” you hear him mumble.

You chuckle, your insides warm, “When do you not?”

“Good question,” Johnny replies, lifting his head off your shoulder and pulling himself back so that he can look at you, his arms never leaving you. “But would it hurt if you said it back? Even if you have to lie?”

You laugh just as a teasing smile lifts on his face. “Missed you,” you finally say. “And that’s not a lie.”

Johnny bites at his lower lip to suppress his smile from getting wider, the woman of his dreams finally so close to him like this, feeling like the luckiest man on earth, because well, he’s convinced he was.

“Beautiful,” he whispers, his eyes glazing over every single one of your features, nothing but love and affection in his shining orbs. Johnny’s ducking his head, resting his forehead against yours in the process, determined to plant a kiss on your lips and you’re closing your eyes as he’s doing so, wanting nothing more than to feel him closer.

When you feel his breath against your skin, heartbeat skyrocketing and mind hazy with the thought of him, you’re quick to let go of him when Youngho’s voice jolts you both. “Mommy! I need help with this question!”

You’re suddenly chuckling, the disappointment in Johnny’s face too amusing for you not to make fun of. “Maybe later,” you tease but you lean on your tip toes anyway to plant a quick kiss on his cheek, hoping it’ll make do for now before walking away from him to tend to your son.

Johnny finds you and Youngho side by side on the dining table with you assisting Youngho on a particular question for his homework, your eyes focused on him as he jots down what comes to his mind after your direction. Johnny leans on the doorframe, revelling in the sight in front of him, falling in awe that this was his very own family and to make things even better, a family with the love of his life, his first love, you.

“Good job baby,” you praise when Youngho finishes the final question, squishing his cheeks in between your palms and planting a kiss on his forehead.

Not only were you an amazing lover, you were the best mother too.

When you spot Johnny watching you interact with Youngho with a soft smile, you tilt your head to the side, silently questioning him for just standing there, he just gives you another heart-stopping smile before he’s shaking his head and finally moving from his spot to join you both on the table.

“What do you boys want to eat for dinner?” you ask when Johnny takes a seat beside Youngho, helping you put away his books into his backpack.

“Pizza!” Youngho cheers.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” you counter, knowing how much junk Youngho’s been having recently and plus it had been an agreement between you two that treats were saved for Fridays, a few more days to go until then.

“But mommy—“

“A healthier option maybe baby.”

Youngho pouts but when an idea pops up in his head, he’s suddenly turning to Johnny who’s just finished zipping his backpack when he places the last book inside. He’s tugging on Johnny’s sleeve, puppy eyes ogling up at him.

“Daddy,” he whispers.

When Johnny grasps what he’s trying to imply, he slowly trails his eyes over to you to which is met by a knowing gaze, already aware of what your son was trying to do.

“I think pizza sounds good!” Johnny suddenly announces and it makes you roll your eyes because these two were already scheming with one another, making it two against one.

So that’s how you find yourselves lounging in the living room with a box of pizza on thhe coffee table, Youngho’s favourite movie playing on the television after yet another successful persuasion from the two to allow him to watch on a school night. Youngho is wedged in between you and Johnny, a blanket big enough draped over your laps. Every now and again, Youngho would tug at Johnny’s sleeve when his favourite part would come up and it makes Johnny pay extra attention, asking Youngho in return why certain parts have become his favourite. And it doesn’t take long before Youngho’s snoozing, head falling towards your side. So when the movie ends and Johnny’s turned the television off, Johnny lifts Youngho in his arms as you watch him with a fond smile, thanking the heavens for blessing your life with such an endearing man whose affection for his son literally oozes in the way he looks at him.

When Johnny returns a few minutes later, he returns to his seat on the couch, only this time, he sits much closer to you, his shoulder touching with yours as you work to make sure he’s under the blanket just as much as you were. He’s reaching for your hand and when gets a hold of it, he interlocks his fingers with yours, his skin warm and soft. You lean your head on his shoulder, exhaling a breath of relief.

“Finally some time alone with you,” Johnny muses, turning his head slightly to kiss your head. He’s rubbing the back of your hand with his thumb as he rests his head on top of yours. “I missed this.”

“Me too,” you agree quietly. “Actually, I missed a lot of things.”

“Enlighten me.”

You shrug your shoulders, “Just.”

Johnny stays silent for a few seconds, merely gazing at the side of your face, smiling gently, literal hearts oozing out of his eyes. “I missed you the most,” he murmurs. “I missed your voice, I missed your hugs, I missed your kisses.”

You chuckle.

“Cheesy.”

“But true,” Johnny reiterates. He’s raising his free hand and it lands on your cheek as you lift your head off his shoulder so that you can look at him, “Remember the letter I wrote you?”

“Mhm.”

“I meant every single word, I still do,” Johnny’s staring into your eyes, gentle and warm orbs that you lose yourself into, a literal window to the depths of his soul; kind, compassionate, loving. “What’s better now is that I get to tell you whenever I want and need to.”

“And here I was crying over you denying what you said when you were drunk,” you say, turning away from him, the memory of that devastating time making you grimace.

Johnny laughs and it vibrates through his chest as he throws his head back. “It’s not funny,” you sulk. “That one hurt.”

“Babe, I lied to you because I thought you chose someone else over me,” Johnny points out when he settles down, catching his breath.

The hairs on your skin stand immediately at the nickname, the thought of it being directed at you making you feel all sorts of emotions inside. “Yeah and look where you assumptions brought you. If you would’ve just asked or let me finished talking—”

Johnny rests his forehead on the side of your head, “I know, I know. I’m sorry for being stubborn.” His hand leaves yours just so he can lift your legs so that it rests on top of his thighs, wanting you close as possible. You’re chuckling as you encircle your arms around his neck, resting the side of your head on his shoulder. “If it makes you feel better, I'm still as crazy about you as the first day I met you,” Johnny sighs, planting a kiss on your forehead.

Everything stills from then on, with you just taking in this moment with Johnny, so content and calm having him this close as his arms tighten themselves around your waist, his palms squeezing them every now and again. No matter how many years have passed, he was still the Johnny you remembered him to be and maybe even better now because he was here for you to hold. And he’s still as expressive as you remember him to be, always facing his emotions face front, no reluctance in confessing how he felt for you, especially with what he says next.

“I love you, y/n.”

It comes out in a low whisper, so delicate, words only for you.

Your home was finally home.

“What are you doing here?”

Your tone is questioning, eyebrow raised but there’s a bashful smile on your face when you see Johnny exit his car, his tie already loose around his neck when he reaches you by the gates of your preschool. He takes your bag from you and plants a chaste kiss on your cheek.

“Picking up my girlfriend from work, what else?” Johnny replies casually and moves to open the passenger seat for you.

You’re trying so hard not to crumble, but the blush that’s creeping up on your cheeks is surely giving you away right now. So you duck your head to avoid Johnny's gaze and scurry to get into the car so that you can take a deep breath to calm yourself. It feels just like the time Johnny courted you during the earlier years of your youth.

“How was work today babe?” Johnny asks as he revs the engine of his car to life, eyes on the road after strapping your seatbelt for you and he doesn’t stop there because once you’re settled in your seat, he’s reaching for your hand, lacing his fingers with yours and keeping it in place on his thigh.

You’re smiling as you train your eyes on the road ahead, afraid that if you glanced at the man who’s making your heart thump, you’d literally melt. “Okay, the usual, the kids are still as cute as ever.”

Johnny smiles and brings your palm up so that he can kiss the back of your hand. “I’m glad to hear that.”

“How about yours?” You ask, finally having the courage to look at him, even is side profile seeming too perfect in your eyes. “I thought you’d be at work all day today?”

You see Johnny shrugging his shoulders, “Might have taken an hour off to see you.”

Though it warms your heart, you can’t help but roll your eyes. “Are you even allowed to do that?”

“Probably not,” Johnny points out and glances at you for a second, “But I couldn’t help it.”

You scoff fondly, “You are something else Johnny Suh.”

Johnny chuckles and gives your hand a squeeze. “Do we need to pick up Youngho?”

You shake your head, “No, Jaehyun is dropping him off my house later.”

Johnny grins, “Great. More alone time with you.”

“You’ve used up thirty minutes of your unofficial one hour off work babe, I think it’s best you drive back as soon as you drop me off,” you point out playfully.

“Say it again.”

“You need to drive back—”

“No. Not that. What you called me.”

You blink at him before you realise when you recount your words. “B-babe?”

And then you feel the car come to a complete stop when Johnny pulls up on the side of a random road. He’s turning to you, letting go of your hand and smiling at you widely, his eyes disappearing. “I missed you calling me that,” he confesses and before you know it, he’s holding either sides of your face and leaning inwards to plant a sweet kiss on your lips, his happiness transcending from his lips to yours.

You’d almost forgotten how expressive this man was and honestly, it seemed as if Johnny was here to remind you and you really didn’t mind at all.

It doesn’t take long for the two of you to arrive at your house when Johnny begins to drive again, pulling the brakes just outside the gates of your home. He doesn’t want to go and you can tell by the way he tightens his hand around yours.

“Have a good evening at work,” you say, reaching across your seat to kiss his cheek which immediately makes him smile. “Please don’t give your employees a hard time, and also please stop slacking.”

Johnny’s chuckling, “For your information, I happen to be the best boss around.”

“Who also happens to disappear from work at random times of the day to do whatever he wants,” you rebuke, teasing him by pressing your index finger to his forehead.

“Hey hey hey,” Johnny defends, “This was crucial for me. I needed to see you so that I can focus on my work later. Call it a breather if you will.”

You’re rolling your eyes again but your grinning along with him, heart warm and giddy at the nonsense coming out of his mouth, “I’m not going to argue with you anymore because you’re going to be late.”

“I don’t mind, it’s okay.”

“Oh but I do,” you say, reaching across to kiss him on the cheek again, “Thanks for coming to see me, drive safe okay?”

Johnny puckers his lips and tugs at your hand when you’re just about to lean away, keeping your in place. “Another one,” he requests, puckering his lips out even more, “Here.”

You raise a brow at him, “Were you always this clingy?”

“I have every right to be after five years, babe. Cut me some slack.”

You laugh, the sound ringing in Johnny’s ears, falling for you all over again. You comply to his wishes, letting go of his hand to cup his face in your palms and landing a kiss on his lips, allowing them to linger on his for a while longer, feeling Johnny smiles against your lips before you’re eventually pulling away.

“I’ll see you tonight,” Johnny announces when you’re unbuckling your seatbelt. “Don’t miss me too much!”

“I’m taking it that you and Johnny worked things out?”

Ten and Jaehyun’s heads snap towards you at Taeyong’s mention of Johnny’s name.

“Really?!” Ten says excitedly as you hand him a fork for the pasta that Jaehyun is scooping out of the bowl.

You give Taeyong a weird look, wondering how he came to that conclusion without any explanation from your side, “What made you say that?”

“You look really happy,” he points out and it makes Ten and Jaehyun take a closer look at you, literally moving their faces closer to yours across the table to examine you.

Ten’s eyes widen, “That is true!”

You roll your eyes and push their faces away with the base of the palm of your hands, “I look like this all the time, thank you very much.”

Jaehyun shakes his head and resumes scooping out a portion of pasta for you, “I haven’t seen you this happy since university days.”

“It looks good on you, y/n,” Taeyong adds.

“Thank God,” Ten clucks his tongue. “I don’t know how much longer I could’ve endured seeing you so miserable.”

Your mouth forms an “o” and both of your brows raise at Ten who’s begun digging in his food, “What does that even mean? I didn’t look that miserable, did I?”

Taeyong shrugs, “Ten is just being dramatic.”

Jaehyun nods, “Yeah, don’t mind him.”

When you look at Ten again, he’s set his fork down on his plate and you assume he’s trying to mimic you when he pretends to cry, sniffing as he pouts his lips. “You looked like this almost every time I saw you since Johnny got back. I’m not lying and certainly,” he narrows his eyes at Taeyong who’s setting glasses down around the table, “not being dramatic.”

Jaehyun takes a seat, a smile playing on his lips, “If it makes you feel better, Johnny was just as miserable as you. If not, maybe even more.”

“Really?”

Taeyong nods and takes a seat beside Jaehyun, “Yeah. I’ve never seen him so sad before. He basically barged in Ten’s house that night and got drunk by himself. He was saying all these things about you to us.”

“And you know, Johnny hardly cries,” Ten adds. “But he cried that night with us.”

Memories of that night flood your thoughts and that’s when you're reminded how difficult things must have been for Johnny. All this time, he’s been tending to your wounds and helping you heal while it has only occurred to you now that he might actually be needing the exact same thing from you.

The doorbell rings then and Taeyong is quick to go and get the door while you’re in the midst of coming back to reality after having zoned out for a few seconds. Johnny emerges from the hallway and he waves at the guys before he’s walking towards you and openly wrapping an arm around your waist to pull you close so he could press a kiss on your cheek.

“Hey,” he murmurs.

“Yup, they’re definitely together again,” Ten states, pointing his fork at you two.

Taeyong and Jaehyun who’ve seen the scene unfold immediately take their eyes off you two, the feeling of being around the both of you reminding them of the old times. “Yup, definitely,” Taeyong mumbles and begins to eat.

As the four of them talk over dinner with your occasional nod and laugh here and there, you can’t help but be silent for the majority of the time, your earlier thoughts nagging at you in your head because the one thing you’re forgetting and have forgotten all this time is that Johnny is really good at masking, at hiding everything he needed to. As expressive as he was with how he felt, he was also the number one contender for hiding things he didn’t want to feel and you can’t help but feel hurt at the thought of him suffering too, silently, and by himself.

Johnny notices your unusual behaviour and gives your thigh a squeeze from time to time to let you know he’s there, not let you know he notices something is off with you, and though you give him a smile, you’re sure he’s not buying your silent reassurances. So when the guys leave some time after dinner ends, Johnny’s tugging at your arm, grabbing your attention from the dishes that you’re about to wash.

“A penny for your thoughts, hm?” he says softly, a small smile adorning the corners of his lips.

Johnny hasn’t let go of your arm and so you use your free one to pull him close, landing yourself in his chest, arms rising to wrap around his body. When you rest your head against his chest, you can hear his steady heartbeat, calming you in a way nothing else can. “Johnny, you know I'm always here for you, right?”

You feel his arms wrap around you in return, gently pulling you closer into his warmth. “Where is this coming from babe?”

“Just.. we’ve always been talking about me and everything that happened when you were gone,” you begin, lifting your head off his chest to look up at him. “But we never talk about you and how things have been for you during that time... I, I want to know.”

“This is what’s been bothering you?”

You nod.

Johnny takes his eyes off you momentarily, staring into nothing to conjure up an answer to your question and when he’s ready to answer, he redirects his eyes on yours, lips pressed into a thin line. “There isn’t much to tell you if I’m honest. Besides what I've written in that letter.. really nothing much else. All I remember is every day consisting of me missing you, of not really having any energy to do anything because nothing felt right at that point even when it was everything I wanted.. Just, it was hard, I guess?” Johnny pauses, thinking back to all the times he’s spent by himself sleeping off everything that weighed him down. “It was hard since I never really had anyone to talk to and I think I was coming from a position where I didn’t really want to leave in the first place. I guess I just never really came to terms with missing home in those five years.”

You sigh, imagining how difficult all those times must have been. You want him to talk more, to tell you more, possibly every little and big thing that happened in your absence. But you knew better because Johnny almost never talked about anything that upset him.

“And the only reason why I keep asking about you is because I’m sure you’ve had a tougher time raising our son on your own,” Johnny continues, his eyes warm and gentle. “I keep asking about you because I want to know how I can make up for it now.”

You can’t help but smile, Johnny’s ability to always put you first making you feel all sorts of love. “It’s different though, I had Youngho that made everything a little easier. Raising him has been nothing but a blessing. At least for me, I had him. With you...”

“Hey hey hey, stop that,” Johnny interrupts, leaning inwards to press his forehead against yours, eyes tender and lips curled upwards. “It doesn’t matter anymore okay? What matters now is that you and I are here, together, with Youngho. We have the rest of our lives to make up for everything we missed in those five years, okay?”

You nod slightly, your arms wrapping themselves around his neck, “Promise me one thing?”

“What is it, love?”

“Promise me you’d talk your heart out more to me.”

Johnny chuckles, “Geez, if I did, you’d be sick of hearing my cheesiness very quick.”

“Babe, I mean it.”

Johnny smiles and it make you smile too.

“I promise.”

Johnny places a soft kiss on your forehead and you close your eyes instantly to relish it all in, feeling a little too overwhelmed when you realise he really is finally here. You stay comfortable in your position, in his arms where you feel the safest, in the stillness and quietness of your house, just the two of you in the silence of your thoughts and the in the peace of your hearts. You feel Johnny squeeze you in his arms and your heart warms for a hundredth time for all the right reasons.

“Hey y/n?”

“Hm?”

“Come live with me.”

You should’ve known from the moment you opened your eyes first thing in the morning today when Johnny peppered your face with more kisses than usual, when he literally carried you off the bed and into the bathroom just so you could get ready for the day, when he literally could not stop grinning at you like some weirdo until the very moment he dropped you off at work, that he was up to something. With his hands covering both your eyes, body pressed gently behind you to lead you into the right directions, you’re beginning to grow impatient because even though you knew he was keeping something from you, he wouldn't budge and tell you what it was.

“Johnny— I swear, what is happening?”

“Shh, just trust me birthday girl.”

You huff and it makes Johnny chuckle behind you, your hands wrapped around his wrists for support. “I feel like I'm going to trip and fall on my face. Could you please just let me see where I'm going?”

“Where’s the fun in that?” Johnny asks rhetorically. “And besides, don’t you trust me?”

You don’t bother to answer him, just letting him lead you further for another two minutes before you feel him come to a stop behind you. You exhale a breath, somehow your heart picking up its pace because from what you can remember, Johnny always loved to surprise you and with every single one that came after the previous, he had always outdone himself in ways you never thought he would. A small part inside of you is anticipating and the bigger part is excited, despite your actions showing otherwise.

“Okay babe, keep your eyes closed until I tell you to open them, okay?”

“Alright.”

You feel Johnny’s hands leave your eyes and you hear him scurry away from you, his steps echoing towards somewhere in front of you.

“Okay, open them!”

And you finally do.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY Y/N!”

In front of you are the people you love the most, with party hats on their heads and streamers flying in all directions. You’re smiling as you scan the whole room, your eyes falling on Youngho first who’s in Johnny’s arms, Taeyong, Ten and Jaehyun in another corner and Mr and Mrs Suh in front of the small crowd, smiling at you fondly. The entire kitchen and dining area is decorated with banners and balloons, all catered to your liking with food spread out generously on the dining table and the kitchen counter. Everyone’s grinning at you and you’re not really sure what to say because out of all the possible things Johnny could have prepared for your special day, you certainly did not expect this.

“Oh my god, you guys!” you manage to croak out, your eyes brimming with tears with how overwhelmed you are because in this room, was everyone you loved so dearly.

From the corner of your eye, you see Johnny set Youngho down from his arms and making his way over to you. When he reaches you, you’re already bent down to meet him at eye level.

“Happy birthday mommy,” he greets with a toothy smile, proceeding to put a hat on your head.

“Thank you so much baby,” you murmur when he’s reaching for your face to give you a kiss. “Did you plan this with daddy?”

Youngho nods shyly and you shoot Johnny a glance behind him only to be met with a dreamy smile. It isn’t long before everyone’s digging in for food, the boys hugging you one by one to congratulate you on another year of existence, along with Mr and Mrs Suh who greet you nonstop and pulling you aside to talk about anything and everything, ecstatic at the news of you and Johnny getting back together.

“I’m so happy for the both of you!” Mrs Suh exclaims, pulling you in for what feels like a sixth hug. “This has been everything Johnny’s ever wanted, and really, all we’ve ever wanted!”

Mr Suh chuckles and taps his wife by the shoulder, “You can let her go now, she has other guests to entertain.”

Mrs Suh releases you immediately, “Oh my God, I’m so sorry honey, I got carried away! I’m just so happy.”

You smile in return, taking a moment to spot Johnny in the room behind you before directing your attention back to his parents, “I’m just as happy as you are. I really am.”

And you really meant it.

“How does it feel to be a year older?” Ten asks by the counter, munching on some barbecue.

“I feel the same?” you point out with a shrug of your shoulders. “I don’t feel much different!”

“Hey y/n,” Jaehyun butts in, a plate full of food in his palm, “Remember that time you asked me about dating someone so Youngho could have a playmate?”

Taeyong finds himself beside you, picking up a piece of watermelon with his fork, “Well now you have someone to make Youngho’s playmate with!”

Ten and Jaehyun are wiggling their eyebrows at you from across the counter while Taeyong jabs at your side with his finger. “Will we be expecting a baby number two before this years ends?” Ten teases further, a knowing look on his face.

“You guys,” you roll your eyes but smile anyway. “The answer is no.”

Out of the three, Ten is the quickest to glare, “Oh come on! Johnny is here! What are you waiting for?”

“Johnny is indeed here,” Johnny pipes up beside Ten who happens to be nearby to hear his name being mentioned. He looks at you, quirking an eyebrow, “What’s happening?”

Jaehyun smirks at you and you glare at him in warning. “Y/n over here wants a playmate for Young—”

Jaehyun doesn’t get to finish his sentence when you launch a balled up piece of tissue his way, hitting him square in his pretty face. But it didn’t seem to matter because Johnny appears to have caught on, a mischievous glint now coating his eyes.

“Is this an invitation, babe?” Johnny teases, raising his brows up and down at you.

You sigh and roll your eyes, “You boys are unbelievable.”

Some time in the evening, when all the guests have left, including Youngho who insists on staying with is grandparents for the night, you head upstairs to wash up and take a long shower after much convincing from Johnny who insists he’s okay with finishing up the cleaning. But as soon as you finish with your nightly routine, Johnny is calling you from downstairs.

“I told you I should’ve stayed and helped—”

Your eyes widen at what your eyes come across as soon as you enter the kitchen. The lights have been dimmed and in the centre of the room, is a table for two people, clad in red velvet cloth and candles, plates for two on opposite sides and wine glasses to accompany each one, music playing quietly in the background. There’s rose petals scattered around where the table is situated and then your eyes catch him, Johnny, standing right beside the table, a single red rose in his hand, smiling at you gently.

“Happy birthday my love,” he says before he’s walking over to you and handing you the rose in exchange for your hand so that he can lead you to your seat.

Johnny has definitely outdone himself again tonight.

“Another surprise?” you say weakly, another wave of emotions gushing at you. “I’m not quite dressed for the event,” you chuckle and look down at Johnny’s white t-shirt that you grabbed out of nowhere earlier paired with shorts.

Johnny chuckles and pulls out your chair for you to sit, pushing it back in slightly when you do, “Not to worry. You always look beautiful no matter what you wear.”

When you take a closer look, you realise Johnny’s served his famous steak and you watch as he takes his own seat, proceeding to pour red wine for the both of you. When he finishes, you raise your glasses up, sharing a toast in celebration of another year of your life. You fall into mindless conversations about the day as you both eat, asking him about everything that went on behind the scenes for today to happen and as he speaks, you realise just how much this man must really love you for him to go through such lengths to make you feel extra loved on a day you never really celebrated anymore.

From across the table and beyond the candles, Johnny gives you a knowing look that suggests something you didn’t think you’d be doing tonight when your favourite song plays distantly in the background. You watch him carefully with an incredulous smile as he rises from his seat in a prince-like manner. He reaches your seat then and offers a hand.

“May i please have the pleasure of being your first dance tonight?” he asks politely, body slightly bowing towards you. You laugh involuntarily and raise a brow playfully, “come on babe, for old time’s sake.”

The shining of his eyes encourage you to accept his request and you do so by placing your hand in his outstretched one. “Certainly, Mr Suh.”

Johnny finds both of his hands on either side of your waist while yours sit comfortably on his chest. You both sway side to side and waves of nostalgia come flooding back to you, remembering the last time you had the opportunity to spontaneously dance with him like this was in the confinement of your cozy home was five years ago.

“I really missed this,” Johnny says, bringing you back to reality while staring down at you. You look up to meet his eyes and the familiar sense of longing for the very first person you’ve ever loved comes back.

“I did too,” you whisper faintly. A smile grazes his lips, gently squeezing at you by the hips. “Johnny is it okay if I—“

“Always love, you don’t even have to ask,” he cuts you off. You lean your head on Johnny’s chest, a habit you always showed back then when you found yourself swaying with him to songs you both loved. The familiarity of the situation and how it feels to be this close to him makes you silently wish time would stand still, at least just for tonight.

Johnny pulls a palm higher up your back and begins to rub it in a soothing manner, both of you soaking it all in. He presses a kiss on your temple and you can’t help but notice a subtle change in the pace of his heartbeat as it picks up its pace, a complete contrast to how calm he is on the outside.

But then you understand why.

“Hey y/n.”

And then you start to feel your heartbeat pick up too because if anything, when Johnny began with those two words along with his gentle voice, it always seemed to change your life forever afterwards.

“Mhm?”

“Marry me.”

You immediately lift your head off his chest, your eyes widening up at him, fearing you might have heard wrong. But you know you didn’t because he’s staring down at you with eyes full of... love.

“Johnny—”

“I don’t have a ring yet.. but the moment felt too right for me not to ask you,” Johnny explains, a nervous smile now appearing on his lips. “But I have been meaning to ask you, for the longest time now, it’s just I never knew when but tonight—”

“Yes.”

Johnny’s eyes widen this time. “W-what?”

“Yes.”

“Yes?”

“Yes I’ll marry you.”

Johnny’s eyes soften as yours brim with tears. “Really?”

You nod as he smiles, “Yes really.”

Johnny’s hands leave your body, palms now caressing your face, his touch warm and gentle and his lips on yours even more gentler. Johnny held you like you were the most delicate thing he’s ever touched and at that moment, for the first time you knew, he was the only man you’d ever want to spend the rest of your life with.

Lacuna. A missing or blank piece.

All this time, Johnny had been yours.

And this time, he was here to fill all of it.

493 notes · View notes

harianadimples · 4 years

Text

He Held The World Upon a Dream

6.2k: hariana, single!dad harry, single!mom ariana warning(s): purest fluff, wholesome dad!harry content *chef’s kiss*

| – | – | – |

Harry and Bambi usually had to wait for Teddy to come from another part of the school since the Year 1’s exited from another part of the school. Harry could remember the way Bambi sprinted towards him one day, a big smile gracing her face as she hugged him hello. It’d been a particularly short hug since Bambi was eager to tell him about her new friend, Luna. The two were partnered up for reading buddies, and were sat next to each other in class. Harry remembered Bambi pointing towards a small girl across the way; Harry assumed it was Luna. With Luna appeared to be a woman, but he didn’t see her face as the woman’s back was to them. He recalled Bambi telling him that she was Luna’s mother and that she was ‘really pretty, like a princess’; in her words.

It’d been about a month now, and he’s never gotten more than a glimpse of this woman. It’s amazing how acquainted he’s become with the back of her head, which always seemed to have her hair up in a ponytail. He’s never gotten a chance to approach her since she seemed to drop off Luna well before he’d arrive with Teddy and Bambi, and the times when he definitely could approach her during pick-up, his body would betray him and he’d stay well enough away to avoid a series of awkward situations his poor overthinking mind would concoct for him.

Yet, there was one time when he’d slept through his alarm and had to drop Teddy and Bambi off through the front office so he could sign them in. He saw her then, still the back of her head, but he heard her. Oddly enough he was blindsided by the sound of her voice before it even registered in his mind that she wasn’t English. Her voice was soft, with a certain quality to it that he likened to a melody. As a musician he’d fallen completely in love with the tone of her voice. He didn’t know anything at all about this woman, aside from her being the mother of his daughter’s friend, but he could tell from her voice and his daughter’s dramatization of this woman’s elusive beauty, that she could be the most perfect woman to ever walk the earth– in his head.

“He Held The World Upon a Dream”

The one inspired by “She” by Harry life ruiner Styles

-:-:-:-

“Bambi, wake up,” Harry gently poked the sides of his sleeping toddler, earning a low whine of annoyance from the four-year-old as she raised her Star-Wars themed blanket and hid herself under to avoid him. “Teddy first,” his youngest mumbled, referring to Theodore, her older brother by two years. There’s a precious twang in how she speaks, reflecting her young age which makes Harry’s heart soar a little.

“M’already awake Bambi. C’mon get up, daddy made chocolate chip waffles and I want some,” Teddy spoke from the doorway with crossed arms as Bambi suddenly pushed her blanket off herself, sitting up straight, which made Harry lean back quickly to avoid injury.

“Choc-o-late waffles?” Bambi gasped. “But it’s Tuesday?”

“I know, baby. Know you’ve been a little sad lately since we moved away from your friends at your old school, so it’s my treat,” Harry explained as he smoothed his hand over her unruly curls.

“But, are we having waffles on Friday?” Bambi asked slowly, now finding interest in the sun shining through the curtains.

“Of course angel, like always,” Harry assured her.

“Can have waffles right now…”

“Teddy,” Harry turned to his son who didn’t seem to be phased by his father hearing what he’d muttered under his breath.

Harry had set out Bambi’s outfit for the day the night before. It had begun to be rather dreary in London; grey skies and dry air. Teddy was already ready, so the pair left Bambi’s room to let her get dressed while they made their way down to the kitchen. As they put out three plates of waffles on the dining table, the quiet pitter-patter of tiny feet could be heard as Bambi entered through the corridor. Harry helped his kids into their seats, rolling up the sleeves of their jumpers before joining them to eat.

“Daddy?” Bambi’s small voice spoke through a bite of waffles.

“Swallow first angel, remember manners” Harry gestured for her to do so, which took a minute since she’d taken quite a large bite.

“Daddy?” Bambi asked again.

“Yes, my love?” Harry chirped with the same enthusiasm.

“Can you braid my hair after?”

“Sure baby. You didn’t like the space buns I did on you yesterday?”

“I like it, but Luna has braids and I like her.”

“Ohhh,” Harry nodded understandingly, “is this the same Luna who is in your reading buddy group?”

“Yeah, she’s my friend,” Bambi smiled.

“See, Bambi, moving can be scary, but you’ll get to meet all kinds of people and make new friends and make new memories. And it doesn’t mean you have to forget your old friends, you’re just gaining more; the more the merrier.”

Harry was happy to know that Bambi had made a friend. He’d only seen a glimpse of this Luna when he’d arrived to pick up Bambi and Teddy from school on their first day.

He felt it was necessary to be there for drop-off and pick-up since they’d started a new school. He didn’t want his children to be frightened, and wanted them to adjust on their own terms rather than his own. It did require some sacrifices to be made on his part, as a musician, to opt out of making appearances to promote his music so he could spend time with his children. Yet, as a father, he’d much rather be with his children anyway, than having to play the part of a charismatic singer for the interests of others. His fans had been understanding of his new schedule and the proceedings that have unfolded since Teddy was born. Of course it took some time for the world to adjust to the idea of ‘singer-songwriter, Harry Styles, becomes a father,’ meanwhile Harry couldn’t have felt more than excited, yet terrified, to embark on the adventure of fatherhood. By the time Bambi came along, Harry was certain that being a father was the most important thing to him, and really, the only full-time job that is fulfilling to his soul.

By nine in the morning, Harry had pulled his car into the school parking lot. They walked the rest of the way to the pavement, where other parents were dropping off their kids as well.

“Bye daddy, see you later!” Teddy collected his hug and kisses from Harry quickly before running off to join his group of friends on the playground. Harry chuckled and waved him off before pulling Bambi along.

They hadn’t gotten far before a small girl came running up to Bambi, tackling her with a hug.

“Luna!” Hearing his youngest’s shrill laughter brought another warm feeling in Harry’s stomach as he took in the young girls’ reunion. Luna seemed to notice that Harry was still there, and gave him a curious look.

“Are you Bambi’s dad?” Luna asked.

“Yes, I am, and you are Luna. Bambi is always telling stories about your adventures here over dinner,” Harry chuckled.

“Your hair Bambi!” Luna suddenly gasped as she reached for the braids that fell over Bambi’s shoulders.

“Yeah, my daddy did ‘em for me,” Bambi smiled proudly at Harry who felt like he could fall to his knees at any moment. “Okay, daddy you can go now. I’m with Luna.” And… that moment passed.

“Alright angel, but first give daddy a hug and kiss goodbye.”

He made sure to squeeze her extra tight and make the kiss extra wet and noisy, just for the sake of it, and revelled in the high-pitch whine that came from Bambi as she struggled to escape him. Harry laughed with her as he eventually set her down and let Bambi run off with Luna.

…

He saw her again; only a glimpse from behind as she helped Luna into her car. Harry doesn’t recall noticing anyone else with her as he drove off with that one thought in his mind.

“Daddy is doing some writing with the band today, but I still want you to start your homework right away when we get home. I’ll have Ben sit with you so he can help you if you need it.”

“Can we watch cartoons after?” Teddy asked.

“Only if you finish your homework first. Ben will check it, and so will I after.”

When they arrived at the house, Ben was already sat at the dining table with a series of snacks set out for Teddy and Bambi when they arrived. He kneeled down and greeted the two-younglings with a hug.

“Thanks for the help Ben,” Harry said as he clapped his hand over Ben’s shoulder, giving him a friendly shake before picking off an animal cracker from Bambi’s plate to eat. “I’m gonna go set up the studio. When the rest of the band arrive just send them to the den.”

“Anything else H?”

“No, that’s it for now,” Harry paused, checking his phone for any messages. It was 1:32 in the afternoon and he was feeling rather drained. “Actually, could you run out and get coffee?”

Harry lived a ten-minute walk away from a plaza which had this quaint café where he usually got his coffee, so he wouldn’t be long. Once Ben was gone, Harry slid into the seat next to Bambi who had already pulled out her workbook and pencil case, and was sharpening her pencil.

“So what are we looking at?” Harry asked.

“Math. This is a circle,” Bambi explained, pointing at the rough drawing on her page. “I have to practice drawing the shapes.”

“What about you Teddy?” Harry asked.

“Practicing writing letters and then I have to read aloud this book,” Teddy explained.

The two ate their snacks as they worked quietly. Harry liked putting on a playlist of instrumentals of songs they like on low volume as white noise for them, since they seemed to focus better without the silence. Bambi was having fun copying the shapes in her workbook, oftentimes just completely straying from the correct shape and adding faces in their centres for her own entertainment. Meanwhile, Teddy seemed highly concentrated on not veering off line, making sure every stroke of his pencil was straight and pressed deeply onto the page.

Ben soon returned with Harry’s coffee.

“Okay babies, I’ll just be in the den.” Harry kissed the top of their heads before taking his coffee into the next room down the corridor, shutting the door behind him.

Harry had turned the den into his own makeshift studio a few months before Teddy was born. He knew he couldn’t leave his new family, but he couldn’t just stop working all together with his kind of profession, especially since Teddy arrived as a surprise, and neither he nor his team had a real plan at the time. So, the studio was the first sort of stability that he arrived at that would allow him to work from home and look after Teddy as well. Having Ben as his assistant was also quite helpful.

As he sat at the couch with his journal and coffee, he thumbed through the pages until he arrived at a blank page. On the page on its left he’d drawn a rough sketch of the mysterious woman he knew nothing about. Of course, the sketch was of the back of her small frame against an open background; he hadn’t decided on what background he’d give her. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to immortalize her in a school playground, since she’s seemed to be appearing in other places as well. Perhaps Harry’s gone totally insane, but he’d once thought he’d seen her at the market, a completely different territory from the familiarity of the school playground. She’d somehow embedded herself in his mind when he saw her in her in the school office and heard her voice.

Harry thought about earlier that day, when he saw her walking with Luna to their car. How her hair, in its ponytail, moved with her as she’d look at Luna every once in a while, engrossed in the story of her day. She seemed like such an attentive mother, very caring and sweet to her daughter who looked at her like she hung the moon.

Another thing Harry noticed was that she always picked up Luna alone.

Harry wondered where Luna’s father was, but had some intuition that her mother might be in the same boat as him. That would be a good topic of conversation with her, something that would bring them closer. Though, it’d be rather awkward for Harry to finally introduce himself to this woman, saying along the lines: ‘Hey, I’m a single parent too. Let’s have coffee sometime.’ Not to mention how assumptive it is and rather intrusive.

Regardless, he’d still love to have coffee with her someday. The idea brings such warmth to Harry’s cheeks, not from shyness but from pure embarrassment, because he’s never even met the woman, let alone spoken to her. Yet here he was, absolutely infatuated with her already. He figured that he’d eventually properly meet her considering their daughters were becoming closer and closer each day.

Harry dreaded the reaction he’d get from his band, whom are some of his closest friends, once they heard about this woman. Whether he pursued her or not, they’d find some way to tease him about their relationship which, for now, doesn’t exist yet. They already thought he was seeing someone since he tended to get lost in his daydreams of her, but he kept this one to himself, mostly because he wouldn’t know what to say to them if they asked who she was because he literally doesn’t know who she is.

…

At dinner Harry sat quietly as he went around the table, letting his babies talk about their day between bites. Teddy was more self-manageable and knew how to feed himself, while Bambi still needed some assistance slicing her food into smaller bits, so while he did that for her, he and Bambi listened to Teddy talk about what he did in school that days.

“Can I bring my barbie to play tomorrow?” Teddy asked, wrapping up his story.

“Course bubs, but make sure you don’t lose it again. It’ll be your fourth one this month,” Harry said.

“Ketchup daddy,” Bambi spoke up, making grabby hands for the bottle. Harry picked up the bottle, squeezing a dollop in the corner of her plate. Bambi pouted at the size, gazing up at her father with her big eyes.

“Last time you left so much on your plate because you squeezed so much,” Harry sighed, giving her nose a light tap with his fingertip.

“It was on accident,” Bambi pouted, “it just went phflttt.”

“So, what did you do at school today?”

“Learn stuff,” Bambi shrugged.

“Oh, what stuff?”

“Like math and words. I read and coloured– oh!” Bambi’s eyes suddenly widened as she heaved herself off her chair, sprinting around the table to where her bag was resting in a chair. She rummaged through her bag and pulled out a folded piece of construction paper. She walked to Harry, opening it for him to see. “I drew this for you.”

“Oh, wow!” Harry gasped, taking the paper gently, careful not to get any of his food on it since it was much larger than he expected.

“That’s you, and that’s Teddy, and that’s me, and that’s the house,” Bambi explained, pointing at three stick figures and a rough shape of a house.

“What’s that there?” Harry asked, pointing to a beige ball in stick-Bambi’s arms.

“A doggie…” Bambi trailed off.

Harry sighed deeply, unable to hold back a smile when he peered at his daughter, seeing the mischievous glint in her eyes as she mirrored his smile; dimples and all.

“What’s its name?” Teddy asked, now interested in Bambi’s drawing as he kneeled in his chair to see better.

“Careful Teddy.”

“Waffles,” Bambi grinned. “Daddy, did you know Luna has a doggie? She has like ten of them!”

“Oh, really?”

“Yeah, its name is pis-pitache-pista-um–.”

“Pistachio?”

“Yeah! Luna said that when I get a doggie we can play at the park together so Waffles and Pi-ta-cho can be best friends like us!”

“Bambi,” Harry sighed, choosing his next words carefully as to not upset his daughter, “remember what we agreed?”

“That we’re gonna wait a little,” Bambi sighed after a brief moment of silence.

“I’m sorry angel. Right now you and Teddy are my priority. I want to make sure you’re both settled before we bring in a new member to the family. Training a dog takes a lot of time and effort.”

“I can help,” Bambi spoke in a small voice, leaning her head on Harry’s shoulder. “I can be res-pi-ble.”

“I know you can baby, but it’s not the best time right now. But, if you want, we can go to some shelters this weekend and we can have a look.”

“Okay,” Bambi sighed. Harry never liked disappointing his kids, but they’d somehow been raised which such an unbelievable sense of empathy that he sometimes wished they’d tell him off when he was acting like a dickhead. But no, they hardly ever threw a tantrum; usually it’s when they’re tired and grumpy, and after a bit of screaming, toys being thrown, and the door to their bedroom slamming, Harry would come up and speak to them, not really speaking himself, but making sure his kids felt comfortable enough to be open with him. He wanted to teach his kids to not be closed off from their emotions, and to be able to feel free to express themselves. They’re bound to say something out-of-pocket because of their young age, but with those instances come lessons to be learned, and everyday is a new opportunity for them to pick up on life lessons whether they were searching for an answer to a homework question or asking for a pet.

After dinner, Harry let Teddy and Bambi watch some tv while he cleared the table and washed the dishes. Afterward, he carried them upstairs and prepared them a bath. He let them soak in the water for a few minutes while he ran out and put out clothes for the pair in their room. After washing, he wrapped them up in towels and carried them out. He helped Bambi change first before moving onto Teddy.

“Go on and pick a book while I help your sister with her hair,” Harry said as Teddy nodded and approached the small bookcase, kneeling in front of it to select a book.

Harry walked to Bambi’s bed where she sat, her feet dangling above the floor as she kicked them back and forth, her attention clearly set on her pink-coloured toes. Harry reached for the de-tangle brush on her bedside and sat down on her bed, lifting her so she could sit in his lap while he combed her hair.

Harry couldn’t resist; he buried his nose in her hair, inhaling deeply.

“Hmmm, my baby smells so clean, like watermelon.”

Harry knew the bottle claimed to smell like the fruit, and even if it didn’t necessarily smell like actual watermelon, it still smelled rather nice and fruity. He and Bambi seemed to share the same nose for things like scents, since they have the same taste in shampoo smells and candles, and such.

Bambi’s hair was getting rather long, but Harry didn’t want to cut it. He thought she looked so adorable with her long curls, and until Bambi raised any complaints he wasn’t going to force her to get it cut. It meant her needing a special routine to keep them looking nice and healthy, which thankfully after some weeks of trial and error and more research, Harry came up with the perfect routine for her. The only downside was the time it took to do for her, but it made for some quality father-daughter time.

Teddy had a similar routine with his curls, only his hair took less time to do since his hair was much shorter than Bambi’s so Harry would often do his once he was done with Bambi. When Bambi was all set, Harry moved onto Teddy and sat him in his lap with the brush.

“Oh, brilliant choice,” Harry said as Teddy opened the book.

“Are you ready Bambi?”

“Ye-Yeah,” Bambi yawned.

“Okay.” It took Teddy a moment to find a comfortable position in Harry’s arms. As he began to read aloud, he followed the words with his finger like he’ learned in school, and took his time to get the words right. “A m-mother held her baby… and very slowly rocked him back and forth… back and forth… back and forth… and while she held him, she sang,” Teddy paused, looking up at Harry as if that were his cue.

“I’ll love you forever, I’ll like you for always, As long as I’m living my baby you’ll be,” Harry sang, rocking Teddy. He let his little one wriggle around, smiling gently to himself at the earnestness of the young boy as he propped the book up so Bambi could see the pictures from where she laid in bed.

…

That evening Harry had the strangest dream. He’d woken up fully alert, long before he was due to bound because his dream had felt so real, and so good, that it seemed like his brain was ahead of his heart this time and knew, this one needed to be written down. So, Harry immediately turned on his bedside lamp, reached for his journal, and opened to a fresh page.

Harry stood by, watching from afar as Bambi came into view among the children leaving through the double doors of the school building. Bambi wasn’t alone; she was holding hands with her friend Luna, paying very little attention to where she was walking as she kept her attention on the young girl which nearly sent her to the ground. Harry, knowing it was wrong, couldn’t help but laugh at his little girl’s fumble; she’d gotten her legs from him anyway.

“Hi daddy!” Bambi finally noticed Harry standing nearby, and briefly left her friend to run up to him. She tackled his legs first before he bent down to pick her up, carrying her so he could properly squeeze her and kiss her plump cheeks. Though, this didn’t last long as Bambi wrestled herself out of Harry’s arms to return to Luna.

“Mumma!” It was Luna’s turn to leave Bambi behind as she ran past Harry.

“Hello, my darling,” the woman cooed as she greeted her daughter.

Harry stood with her as they watched their daughters begin talking among themselves again. Teddy joined the pair, pulled in by the handle on his bag by Bambi. Harry chuckled at his surprised expression which eventually mellowed out as he hugged Bambi, but not before playfully shoving her.

Seeing his daughter seemingly opening up to somebody other than himself or Teddy was such a relief for him, and just a generally nice thing for him to see. She’d always been a rather anxious child, which made making friends a little difficult for her, but she’s always had the biggest heart, and a quality about her that made her care a lot for anyone in her radius, which in return made them care for her. Still, sometimes she can grow a little tired trying to keep up with the exchanges of daily life and it can put her in a low mood. Moving has taken on toll on her for sure. It’s something he works on with her, but it seemed like she’s beginning to adjust to the new change; slowly, but gradually, she’s returning to her cheerful self. Teddy would attest that he’s done more for Bambi, being her older brother who reads a bedtime story for her, and lets her play with his dolls under his supervision, and sometimes finishes her homework for her when she falls asleep. Though, as their father, he tries not to promote his son’s inherent sense of responsibility for his sister’s upbringing since that’s primarily his responsibility; he does pride himself in having produced a son as empathetic as Teddy. Likewise, he prides himself in producing someone as caring and accepting as Bambi.

Harry was sure that he had sprung a few tears just thinking about his babies when he felt someone tug his arm.

“They grow up so fast, don’t they?” The woman next to him sighed right next to his ear.

“Swear it was only yesterday; I was carrying Bambi from the nursery, and bringing her in so Teddy could hold her.”

A reel of Bambi’s birth abruptly played for him, like his brain needed him to see what happened when his princess was born. She completed his ideal family: one boy and one girl, though Harry was never opposed to having more kids. His immediate family was rather small, but he had plenty of cousins who he was close to. Being a family oriented person, Harry was more than happy with the idea of growing his family, though time would only tell before he was ready to open up about why he hasn’t exactly leaped at the chance.

Teddy had the honour of naming Bambi, though it was unintentional. He’d been upset that he wasn’t a part of her birth, having to stay with Anne and Gemma in the waiting room while his little sister was being delivered. Harry recalls how he felt when he held Bambi for the first time; he was a father again, this time to a baby girl; it’s a feeling that can’t be replicated easily, or as often as he’d like, so he christened the moment by singing “Isn’t She Lovely” to his new angel, or rather blubbered through it since he couldn’t stop crying at how perfect she was now that she was in his world. When he was given the okay to show Bambi to his family, he’d interrupted his restless son who was complaining to his grandmother and aunt.

“I wanna see Bambi!” Teddy suddenly yelled.

It turned out Teddy wanted to watch the movie Bambi, but Harry’s always been fond of the movie and in that moment Harry’s heightened emotions found the name Bambi to be perfect for his little one.

“She’s right here,” He said, bringing Bambi into everyone’s view as if she’s always been in their world; always been Bambi.

To this day Teddy claims naming her Bambi was intentional, and despite how often they argue at times, Teddy loves her more than his little heart can comprehend. But he wouldn’t admit it to you in words, he’ll just try to fight you if you upset her.

“I know what you mean,” The woman sighed wistfully, “nice to finally meet you, by the way. I’ve seen you around while picking up Luna. Her and Bambi are real close, she tells me all about Bambi on our drives home.”

“Nice to meet you too,” Harry smiled, “yeah, Bambi is really fond of your daughter. All the stories she tells at dinner involve Luna. We’re new here, so I’m happy to see them get along so well.”

“Really? Welcome! I would have never guessed; you and the kids just seem so well adjusted. It’s like you’ve lived here your entire lives.”

“Oh, you know, it’s still a work in progress, but everyday is a better day.”

She had to go, but they arranged a playdate for Luna and Bambi. The park felt like a nice place to start. Harry’s place has been relatively messy since his band tended to leave bits of their life behind, practically turning his home into a hub for them to crash at whenever they were nearby and needed somewhere to sleep. Regardless of the state of his house, he’d been to the park a few times already, passing through on his morning jogs after dropping off the kids, and he knew there was a jungle gym and sets of swings for the kids to play, which was surrounded by a small open field for them run in. It just felt safe.

He got to learn more about the woman as they kept a third eye on the girls and Teddy who’d somehow been coerced into pushing the pair on the swings. The details remained cloudy in his mind, but somehow his soul felt every word she spoke.

He knew this woman.

He knew her well.

So, he asked her out, and after a few dates, a couple fights, great make up sex, and more time spent, he knew, moments into their first conversation on that park bench under the sycamore tree, that he was going to marry this girl; whoever she may be.

“Theodore, wake up little one, my Theo-ooo–.”

“I’m Teddy daddy,” His son whined through a bellied yawn as he stretched his arms outward, knocking Harry in the face.

“Put your sweater on. Bit chilly downstairs,” Harry told his son, ruffling his curls before moving onto his snoring daughter who’s proven to be the more difficult one to wake up, being the heaviest sleeper in the family; she’s slept through the thunderstorms that have even kept up Harry from the sound, yet she’d managed to get a full night’s rest. Meanwhile Harry and Teddy, who’d never been a fan of loud, unpredictable sounds, stayed up watching cartoons on Harry’s phone until they fell asleep.

“Bambi,” Harry whispered into his daughter’s hair as he gently combed his fingers through her hair, “c’mon my love, Bambi, time to wake up angel.”

Harry waited a few seconds before trying again. Sometimes Bambi tended to be a little grumpy when she’s disturbed from her sleep. As an infant she’d cry relentlessly, but by two she learned to express her annoyances by crossing her arms and pouting, and now at four she’s become more selective, either doing the latter or completely ignoring you with the odd

‘Are you serious right now’ look thrown your way.

“I can wake her up.”

Harry looked at Teddy who was holding his pillow above his head, eager to swing. “No Teddy,�� Harry immediately shut down his son’s mischievous plan, glancing at his daughter who continued snoring loudly. “We’ll just have eat breakfast without Bambi. Too bad she’s going to miss out on chocolate-chip waffles.”

Suddenly, Bambi’s snoring ceased altogether as she sat up quickly, throwing her covers off her small body before leaping past Harry and Teddy towards the bedroom door, yelling, “Waffles! Race ya Teddy!”

“Hey! Wait for me, ugh, Bambi, no fair!” Teddy sprinted out the door after her, while Harry chuckled, leaving their room his well.

He took a slight detour, making his way back towards the bedroom where she was laying in bed, right where he left her. He sighed deeply, smiling at how she’d somehow ended up in a completely different position from the one she started in. She tended to be a fussy sleeper, so he didn’t hold it against her when she’d knock him in the back sometimes with her elbow or cuddle too close to his front which would make him unbearably hard for the rest of the night.

This time she was laying in a sort of flamingo yoga pose, though she was lying down, and had her arm resting over her eyes to block out the light coming in through the window. The moment the bed dipped as Harry sat down on his side of the bed, her arm shifted, revealing her glassy eyes.

“The kids awake?” She asked, her voice roughened by sleep.

“Hmm, hmm, even got Bambi to wake up before you,” Harry said as he leaned into his pillow a little more, “think that means you owe me a kiss.”

She laughed softly and pursed her lips. They kissed for a while in the comfort of their shared bed, resting on their pillows under the matching blanket she picked out for them. Harry was blissed out to the point he’d nearly fallen asleep with his hands permanently gripping her hips as they made small circles against his clothed dick.

“What’re you doing?” A small voice spoke from their doorway which made Harry nearly jump out of his skin. She, on the other hand, kept herself calm as she moved herself away from Harry and out of bed to pick up the little girl who was looking at them like they were aliens.

“Just giving daddy his morning kisses,” She explained as the little girl nodded slowly.

“But it looked like you were hurting him.”

“He’s okay, but maybe he needs some more morning kisses,” She said as she carried the little girl over to Harry.

“Good morning little Luna,” Harry smiled at the little girl. “I’ll have your morning kisses downstairs, okay, I just gotta use the bathroom real quick. Teddy and Bambi are already downstairs.”

Luna was happy to hear that, and wriggled herself free from her mother to leave the room. As soon as Luna left, Harry ran into the bathroom and locked the door behind him.

A few minutes later, he’d finally come down. She was waiting for him in their bedroom, a smile of pure enjoyment in his situation that he kissed on before pulling her down the corridor.

Five plates were set out instead of three at the dining table. Two dogs run past Harry’s feet as he takes his seat next to his wife. She’s talking to Bambi and Teddy and Luna about something he can’t seem to know, but her voice is a waning presence that he can’t help but swim in, so he just listens to her go on about what it is she’s talking about; he must look like her fourth kid, the way he’s staring at her.

She looks at him with an innocent smile, and gently kisses his lips for no reason at all. Hers are sticky from the syrup she had with her waffles, which makes him physically react just to hear his kids yell about how gross they’re being: groaning in union, their expressions of disgust which only makes Harry laugh.

“Mum, dad!”

The dream ended there, so abruptly in the middle of a family moment that Harry needed a moment between waking up and gathering his writing material to remind himself that it wasn’t reality. After writing it out, Harry can see the weird streams of consciousness his brain took as he somehow shifted from dreaming about finally introducing himself to the mysterious woman at Bambi and Teddy’s school, to envisioning a whole life with her and her daughter where they’d come together as one big family.

Harry knew it was normal for some dreams to feel real. This one just felt cruel.

Dreams that tend to include real people and real places have relevance. For Harry, he knew it was because he wanted to know this woman, and he supposed deep down, his subconscious felt ready to introduce a new woman into his children’s lives, and another sibling. But Harry, even knowing this, felt pathetic. Mostly because the reality hit that he had nowhere near the confidence of his dream-self, and he wasn’t bold enough to just pursue a woman as perfect as she is when he feels relatively like shit, if he were to be honest.

Harry has a lot of reason to be afraid to do the bare minimum as merely introducing himself. First of all, she might not be single like he imagines her to be, which would end things rather quickly before they start. Or, she could be completely out of his league and will laugh in his face if he dares to talk to her. But she sounded lovely, and too nice to be the rude kind so he doubts this heavily; she’s still out of his league though. Somehow, even more terrifyingly, if he does happen to move forward through the friend zone and into a relationship with her, theoretically, it’ll be a huge change for himself and his kids, and he doesn’t want them to be afraid or closed off, and he definitely wouldn’t move forward with anything unless they approved; Bambi and Teddy were his number one priority.

He packed the dream away, deciding to not to dwell on the details before they occurred since overthinking doesn’t do much for productivity. Harry needed to introduce himself to this woman before he goes insane. He wanted to be a part of her life somehow; he has Bambi to thank for being friends with Luna, otherwise he wouldn’t have accidentally fallen in love with the idea of this woman. But until they meet, she’ll have to live in his daydreams with him.

| – | – | – |

Happy (Cat) Valentines Day ♡ Hope you enjoyed this one. Part 2 coming soon .x

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iliketowrite1996 · 4 years

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Blind Dates part 2

Part 6/10 of singledad!Steve Rogers x Reader series

Part 1:https://iliketowrite1996.tumblr.com/post/614617294578089984/his-best-girl

Part 2: https://iliketowrite1996.tumblr.com/post/614969499334197248/meet-the-music-teacher

Part 3: https://iliketowrite1996.tumblr.com/post/616114724817584128/lunch-buddies

Part 4:https://iliketowrite1996.tumblr.com/post/616328582794493952/why-not

Part 5: https://iliketowrite1996.tumblr.com/post/616965238563192832/blind-dates-part-1-sneak-peek

TRIGGER WARNINGS AND THEMES- Death of a parent, child feels guilty for the death, loss of a spouse, heartache, absent parent, blind dates, making decisions, grief, loss, acceptance.

It’s been a few weeks since his date with Sharon, and Steve has loved every minute that he’s spent with her. She’s sweet to Jasmine, includes her on Saturday dates, and cares about Steve for more than his looks.

And Steve’s not quite ready to call this love, but he would say that he likes where their relationship is going.

‘’What are you thinking about, Steve,’’ Sharon asks him on a Friday night in november, when Jasmine is spending the night at her aunt and cousin’s place.

‘’Hmmm, nothing. I love how sweet you are with Jasmine,’’ he explains, smiling at her before taking her hand, ‘’I think she is starting to grow on you.’’

‘’I’m glad to hear that,’’ Sharon smiles a bit, accepting a kiss from Steve as they sit on her couch, ‘’So. How was work today?’’

‘’Oh, you know, the usual,’’ Steve shrugs casually, ‘’Paint everywhere, had to tell a kindergartner to stop licking the desks, Jasmine practically jumping with excitement to go to music class.’’

‘’Oh, she loves music?’’

‘’She does. In fact, her teacher has become a good friend of mine.’’

It’s the second to last week of November, so Steve has known you for a good few months. You’ve laughed, you’ve shared details of your move, you’ve had lunch with him a few times.

He tells her this. He doesn’t tell her how his heart breaks a bit at the fact that you have a date tomorrow, even if he does.

‘’You know, Steve,’’ Sharon smirks a bit, but Steve can detect a hint of pettiness behind it, ‘’The way to a girls’ heart is not through talking about another woman.’’

Steve can feel his cheeks heat, ‘’I-I didn’t-’’

‘’I’m kidding, Steve,’’ Sharon snorts, ‘’Listen, we’re not exclusive. I know that you have a crush on our co-worker. I don’t think that you know, though.’’

Steve looks to Sharon, not sure what to say, ‘’I… I don’t have a crush.’’

‘’Okay, Steve. Sure. Listen,’’ she sits up, taking his hand, ‘’We are not exclusive. Why not ask this woman out? You talk about her a lot.’’

‘’She’s busy. She doesn’t have time to date,’’ Steve repeats what you say after a failed date that Pepper tried to set you up with.

‘’And? So are you. You’ve got a kid, two jobs, and your art club. If it’s meant to be, it’ll be. Same as us. So I’m not particularly worried about this- ask her out, Steve It may surprise you,’’ Sharon insists.

And that’s what Steve is thinking Saturday morning when he’s driving around town getting things for Sunday Dinner with Nat and Bucky.

‘’Yeah, sure,’’ he tells the woman on the other end, ‘’She can bring her kid. I’ll bring Jazzy.’’

‘’Thank you so much, Steve. You’re a sweetheart.’’

‘’No problem. I’ll meet her at the arcade at, let’s say…5. ‘’

‘’Alright, I’ll relay the message. Thank you, Steve.’’

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‘’Where are we going, dad,’’ Jasmine questions Steve, as he pulls out of their apartment complex’s parking garage.

‘’Well, I had a date. But she has to bring her kid, so I’m bringing you. I feel like I told you this.’’

‘’I wasn’t listening,’’ Jasmine admits.

Steve glances at her before returning his eyes to the road, ‘’Jasmine, where did you get that hat from?’’

‘’Auntie Patricia. She said...she said that it was mom’s.’’

And it was- a black,velvet hat with a pink blossom on it that her mother had got at a thrift store.

‘’It was. Your mom… she loved that hat. I gave it to your Aunt Patricia when your mom passed away.’’

‘’Dad, do you ever still miss her?’’

‘’All the time, sweetpea. But, hey, I’ve got God and I’ve got you,’’ Steve grins at her when he stops at the red light, ‘’And you’re so much like your mom.’’

‘’I am?’’

‘’Mhm. She loved to sing, too. Off-key, though,’’ he chuckles as he moves with the flow of traffic at the green light, ‘’And sometimes, she’d do this thing where, if she was trying to remember something, she’d snap as soon as she did. Drove me nuts, and you do it too.’’

Steve can tell that she’s reflecting on this new found information, so he is silent until they pull into the parking lot of the arcade.

‘’Like my outfit,’’ Jasmine poses as they get out of the car.

She’s dressed in her black sneakers, blue denim overalls, a rainbow long sleeve shirt, and the blossom hat.

She looks so much like her mother.

‘’You look gorgeous, honey. Come on. Let’s get going,’’ Steve tells her, and the dynamic duo make their way to the arcade.

Steve looks to his phone, and, pulling out the app that he uses to call parents from home so that they didn't have his real number, calls his date.

‘’Hello,’’ she answers on the second ring.

‘’Hey. Um, we’re here. Are you?’’

‘’I am,’’ Steve hears, ‘’We’re at a table over by the ski-ball machine. You can talk to me while you walk this way.

‘’Got it,’’ Steve grabs Jasmine’s wrist guiding her through the sem-crowded arcade to find his date for the evening, ‘’Thanks for being patient. I’m sorry we’re late.’’

‘’No worries. Thanks for being so relaxed about me bringing my daughter. My aunt and uncle have a wedding that he’s ordaining today, and my babysitter fell through.’’

‘’It’s fine, I’m actually happy about this,’’ he admits, ‘’We get to spend time with our kids and see about this.’’

‘’Hmmm… you’re right. That does sound… Steve?’’

Steve looks to see none other than you on your phone, gaping up at him.

‘’Hey, what are you doing here,’’ Steve questions.

‘’Waiting for my date, what are… Steve, are you my date?’’

‘’Looks like it,’’ Steve glances next to you to see Olivia, his little helper from Mrs. Storm’s class,’’Olivia! How are you doing?’’

‘’I’m good, Mr. Rogers,’’ she speaks before burying herself in your arm.

‘’She’s shy,’’ you reveal, and Steve nods.

‘’I didn’t know she was your daughter,’’ Steve tells you before Jasmine clears her throat, ‘’Jasmine, she already knows you’re my daughter.’’

‘’You’re dating my teacher.’’

‘’We’re not dating,’’ Steve sighs, ‘’This is a blind date. It’s one date. Does it make you feel weird?’’

‘’No,’’ Jasmine shrugs, sliding into the street across from you and Olivia, ‘’I’m chill.’’

‘’...Stop copying Sam. Anyway,’’ Steve looks to you as he sits next to Jasmine, ‘’I didn’t know you had a daughter.’’

‘’Are you okay, sweetie,’’ you ask Olivia, who nods, before you turn your attention back to Steve, ‘’I don’t tell everyone, I just like to keep work and home separate.’’’

‘’Respected,’’ Steve nods, ‘’Listen, I’ll get the girls some tokens, and you order the pizza? I think we can talk while they play games while we talk.’’

Because, boy, do you two have a lot to talk about.

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Under your instructions, Jasmine and Olivia are playing some frog game where you hit them with a mallet while you and Steve keep an eye on the two.

‘’I didn’t know you were my date. My aunt said his name is ‘Grant’.’’

‘’Steven Grant Rogers,’’ Steve chuckles, looking down, ‘’I asked her to tell you that. I go by my middle name if it’s someone at the church, just so that the date is truly a blind date until we meet up.’’

‘’Speaking of which… I thought you were with Jasmine’s mother,’’ you approach the subject, ‘’You talk about her a lot. I just thought…’’

‘’No, it’s quite alright. I can see how you got that,’’ Steve looks to Jasmine, wistfulness filling his eyes, ‘’Petra, Jasmine’s mom, passed away the night that she was born.’’

‘’Steve,’’ you gasp, ‘’Steve, I...I’m sorry, I didn’t.’’

‘’No, no, it’s fine. I talk about her a lot but mostly for Jasmine’s sake. She’s always hesitant to bring her up. I want her to know that it’s okay,’’ Steve watches as Jasmine takes the token cup in one hand, and Olivia’s hand in the other, and guides her over to the skee ball machines, ‘’What about Olivia? Is her dad around?’’

‘’He couldn’t get out of town fast enough. I haven’t seen him in five years,’’ you grimace a bit before smiling at Olivia, ‘’She’s one of my greatest blessings though, and I thank God for her. Even if her dad is trash.’’

‘’Tell me how you really feel,’’ Steve jokes, causing you to laugh at your shared bluntness.

‘’I mean, I've forgiven Darryl. That’s his name-I forgave him. Steve, iit hurt to hear her ask about her dad and cry about things that she needs him for, like the daughter-daddy dances. My dad and brothers went with her to stuff like that when we were in Texas, but you know… my uncle is even busier. Between charity events, running the church, Bible study… I don’t know. I don’t want to ask more of them. I just moved out. I feel like I can’t ask them.’’

‘’Hey, they love you. They helped me with Jazzy, I know they’ll help you, too. And, if you ever need a hand, I’m here.’’

‘’Thanks, Steve. I appreciate that,’’ you grin just as your pizza arrives, ‘’Thank you. Steve, I’m gonna take the girls to the bathroom and let them wash their hands, alright?’’

‘’Alright,’’ he agrees, ‘’I’ll watch the food and wait for the drinks.’’

Pretty soon, you’re finishing up the pizza, and laughing while you do so.

‘’Daddy tries to sing,’’ Jasmine frowns, ‘’He’s doing his best.’’

‘’Thank you, honey. You’re grounded,’’ he laughs when she looks at him with fake hurt, ‘’Alright, chickadee. Go play. You’ve got thirty minutes.’’

‘’Okay, daddy. Come on, Olivia,’’ she grabs the five-year-old’s hand, pulling her to the air hockey table.

‘’She fancies herself a bit of a big sister, huh,’’ you look to Steve before looking back at your daughters, ‘’She’s always wanted a little sister. And her Aunt Nataasha and Uncle Bucky are happy with their dog, and Sam still hasn't settled down yet. This is the closer she’ll get.’’

‘’It’s sweet. She’s a sweet kid, Steve. You’ve done a very good job at raising her.’’

‘’Thank you. You’ve done a great job with Olivia, too.’’

‘’You have no idea how much I needed to hear that today,’’ you breathe out, blinking back tears, ‘’It was a rough day.’’

‘’I understand. If you ever need to talk or vent,’’ Steve places a hand on top of yours, causing you to look at where your hands are together on top of the table, the fluorescent lights above doing very little to illuminate how beautiful it is, his hands on yours,

Be still,your beating heart.

‘’Steve…’’

‘’I don’t want to make you think that I’m forcing you into liking me or something. I mean.. I am dating other people. Well, one other person. Not exclusively,’’ Steve sighs, ‘’I don’t know. I just don’t want you to think that I am trying to make this be more than it is. I like us being friends, and that’s most important to me.’’

For the past five years, you’ve been focusing on Olivia and making things as normal as possible for her in all aspects that you haven’t seriously thought about dating. It always came down to her. The only reason you moved was to start over in a new life for yourself, and, in doing so, give Olivia a new life.

‘’I don’t know how I feel right now.Because I don’t want to lose this friendship, either.’’

‘’So then let’s just see where this goes,’’ Steve pats your hand gently before pulling his hand away, just as Olivia and Jasmine rejoin you, coming back with none other than DeShawn.

‘’Hi!,’’ DeShawn greets you both, ‘’Mr. Rogers, I’m here with my mom. She asked if she could take Jazzy and I for ice cream in about a half hour , then she’ll drop her off at home.’’

Steve looks to his watch, and notices that it’s only seven, ‘’Sure. As long as Jasmine is home by 9:30. ‘’

‘’Thanks, Mr. Rogers!’’

‘’THanks, daddy! Bye,’’ Jasmine hugs Steve, you and even Olivia, ‘’I’ll see you later.’’

‘’Bye!’’

The two are rushing off then, leaving you, Olivia and Steve.

‘’It’s an hour to bed time, little one,’’ you remind Olivia, ‘’Let’s head home, Livvy.’’

‘’But I want ice cream, too.’’

‘’Tomorrow. Otherwise you’ll be up all night,’’ you remind her, grabbing her coat, ‘’Since you got the tokens, I’ll pay for the pizza, Steve.’’

‘’Don’t worry about it,’’ Steve begins to reach for his wallet.

‘’No, I insist,’’ you button your daughter’s coat.

‘’Well, at least let me drive you to your apartment, like trail you. I just want to make sure you get home safely.’’

You stand, folding your coat over your arm, ‘’Why?’’

Maybe you’re being irrational and over defensive, but it is what it is, and you’re committed to protecting Olivia from getting attached just to get hurt.

Olivia… and your own heart.

‘’Just as friends. I did it for my friend Nat before she and Bucky got married. Promise.’’

So that’s how you find yourself carrying Olivia as Steve unlocks your door.

‘’So my great-niece is passed out, huh?’’

You and Steve look to see your aunt and uncle. Dressed from the wedding earlier.

‘’What are you two doing here?’’

‘’You really should charge your phone, dear,’’ your aunt takes your sleeping kindergartner, ‘’We came to check up on you.’’

‘’I’m sorry,’’ you sigh, ‘’It died at dinner.’’

‘’Well thank goodness for Steve, then, dear,’’ she winks at him, ‘’I’m gonna get her dressed in her pajamas.’’

‘’Steve. Always a pleasure to see you,’’ your uncle greets your date for the evening with a handshake.

‘’Pastor,’’ Steve acknowledges before your uncle enters behind your aunt, closing your door to give the two of you privacy.

‘’Sorry about them,’’ you chuckle, nervously clasping your hands together in front of you, ‘’Well… I’m going to church tomorrow, so I guess I’ll see you then.’’

‘’See you then,’’ Steve nods, rocking on his feet, ‘’Um… not to be ...imposing. I don’t know if that’s the correct word. But can I kiss you?’’

It’s funny, he thinks, because he hesitated with Sharon. But not with you.

‘’I… I think I’d like that,’’ you whisper, just before Steve leans in and you…

Pull away.

‘’I can’t. I just… Steve, I like you. But I really don’t want to go fast, because that’s how I got hurt last time.’’

Steve is no stranger to being hurt. He’s been on countless of failed dated, lost the love of his life, and now he’s trying to juggle growing feelings for Sharon with a crush that has long been on you.

‘’I understand. Listen,’’ Steve leans his forehead against yours, staring into your eyes, ‘’I want you to know that you can trust me. I’m not… I’m not here to hurt you or Olivia.’’

‘’It’s gonna take a minute for me to see you as a potential partner and not just a coworker or friend, Steve. And I need you to respect that. Besides… you’re already seeing someone else. And I think that you should spend some time seeing the both of us before you make a choice about any of this.’’

It’s a cop out, you feel, but also the truth. You’ve got Olivia to think about. And though you know Steve is a good guy, are you sure that you’re really ready for this? Thinking about dating him and actually dating him are two vastly different things.

‘’Am I getting ahead of myself?’’

‘’No. I , I think, with both of us being parents, we have to consider our daughters. So, no pressure. I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?’’

‘’Yeah. Bye, Steve. Good night.’’

‘’Good night,’’ Steve turns on his heels, away from you and back to his car.

And, for the first time in a while, Steve Rogers is left without a plan…

And no idea how he feels about it.

‘’So… what’s the problem?’’

‘’I like Sharon, I like my co-worker. I’m not here for advice, Nat.’’

It’s been three weeks since your date, and it’s two weeks before Christmas. Since then, you’ve enjoyed Skype dates, Saturday lunches, Wednesday Night Bible Study, and a Sunday dinner with Steve and sometimes your daughters…

While Sharon has enjoyed Friday nights, Saturday breakfasts, and Wednesday early dinners with Steve,

He’s been dating the both of you, and he’s honestly not sure who he’s more interested in. He loves your dedication, your sensitivity, your caring nature. But he adores Sharon’s spitfire attitude, sarcasm, and willingness to arrange her schedule without even having a child of her own.

So here he is,after Sunday morning church service, at Nat and Bucky’s for dinner.

‘’Yes, you are,’’ she leans her head against her hand, glancing to where Jasmine and Bucky are in the kitchen, fixing up dinner, ‘’Because of Jasmine.’’

Steve has spent the last ten years of his life making sure that Jasmine has everything she needs, and that if he can’t get it for her, someone can. He’s turned down dates, poured out savings to pay for things that he needs her to have, borrowed from Sam..

Anything that he can do to take care of her.

‘’She’s my daughter, Nat. I’ve got to consider her.’’

‘’Yeah, I know, Steve. I’m not telling you not to. But you… how do I say this? Steve, you’re using her as an excuse.’’

Steve looks to Natasha with a blank look, ‘’How’s that?’’

‘’You know I'm right. You find something wrong with every woman that you date, Steve. Don’t even-,’’ she holds up a hand before he can cut her off, ‘’You do. And most of the time, it’s valid. But here are two great women, who care about Jazz in some way, who accept her and you, who like you for more than your looks… and you’re looking for advice because you’re afraid.’’

‘’No, my co-worker is afraid,’’ Steve stresses, ‘’She doesn’t want to get hurt.’’

‘’And you don’t want Jasmine to get hurt,but you don’t want yourself to get hurt.’’

Steve is ready to sputter out anything to refute her, to say how she’s wrong.

‘’You're glad that Sharon wants you to date others and you’re glad that your coworker is afraid because you are. Because you are constantly comparing every woman that you meet to Petra, Steve. Because... ,’’ Nat takes his hand, ‘’Because that hurt you to a point where you’re afraid to try again. And if I am wrong, I’ll admit that I’m wrong. But look me, one of our best friends, in the eye and tell me that’s not true.’’

Steve can feel his tears, and Nat acts quickly. She tells Bucky that she’s showing Steve what they did with their office space, and guides him into the spare room, knowing that he doesn’t want to cry in front of Jasmine.

‘’Steve,’’ she sighs, not one for hugs, but opening her arms for her friend.

And Steve, for the first time in years, crumbles at the thought of Petra.

‘’I can’t do it again, Nat,’’ he’s sobbing into her arms again, ‘’Not again.’’

‘’Hey. Hey, shhh… it’s okay,’’ Nat shushes him, ‘’Steve, you can’t hold this in all of the time.’’

‘’I’ve got to do it for Jazzy.’’

‘’Steve, look at me,’’ Natasha urges him, ‘’Jazzy is trying to hold it for you. She asked me if I had any more pictures of her mom. I really think something’s going on with her. Peter talks to Tony… her grades are getting better, she didn’t mind giving up her solo to spend more time studying...but really talks to her, Steve. About her mom, I mean. You know Bycky, Sam, Tony, Pepper and I are here for you. You’ve got us.’’

‘’That’s the worst pain I’ve ever been through. I never want to go through that again.’’

‘’Steve, I can’t promise you that you won’t. I can promise that you never have to go through it alone. You have the strongest faith I have ever seen in someone. You can get through this and you're not alone.’’

Steve thinks of her words, of the friendships that have become like family relationships, of all of the things that his partner has told him about faith…

And of the premise that he made Petra the day that they found out about Jasmine- to always be there for her no matter what.

‘’Nat,’’ Steve sighs, pulling Nat into a hug again, ‘’I don’t know what I’d do without you.’’

‘’Your life would suck,’’ she deadpans, laughing when Steve place a friendly kiss on her head.

‘’You comforted me, and you said you didn’t have any maternal instincts. You know I love you, and Jasmine adores you.’’

‘’I love you both, too. You know that. And, I guess it’s about time that I got some maternal instincts to come out. I’ll be needing them in about seven months.’’

Steve’s grin starts slow, but he can totally see Nat being a great mom, and Bucky being a great day, ‘’Does Buck know?’’

‘’Not yet. I’ll tell him tonight, after dinner. So, please, don’t tell anyone else.’’

‘’Your secret's safe with me, but we'd better get out there before they get worried.’’

Nat Nods in agreement, and the two walk out to find Bucky and Jasmine setting the table for dinner.

‘’Everything okay,’’ Bucky asks the two of them, eyes on his best friend and wife as Jasmine sets forks on the table.

‘’Yeah, what have you two been up to,’’ Nat inquires, ‘’That salad looks amazing, Buck.’’

‘’My assistant made it,’’ Bucky Gestures to Jasmine, who bows gracefully.

‘’That’s my girl,’’ Steve high fives his daughter, ‘’Looks good, sweetpea.I can’t wait to dig in.’’

When dinner is over, Jasmine and Steve go home, change into their pajamas, and lounge on the couch.

‘’Only a few more days until the Christmas concert?’’

‘’Igues,’’ Jasmine shrugs, ‘’I don’t really care about the solo, so I’m glad it went to Alexandria. DeShawn’s mom said she’d take us shopping over the weekend. Dad… daddy, I don’t want to do anything for my birthday this year.’’

Well, he certainly wasn’t expecting that.

‘’Why not, Jazzy?’’

‘’Because it makes you sad. It makes you think about mom. And you don’t…’’

Steve looks over to see his daughter wiping tears furiously, ‘’Jazzy? Jazzy what’s wrong?’’

‘’I’m just tired! I just… dad, why don’t we talk about mom more? WHy don’t you show me more pictures?’’

And there it is. It finally came out, and Steveis both happy that he knows what’s bothering his daughter, and upset that he didn’t see it sooner.

‘’Come here,’’Steve pulls his daughter in a hug, ‘’Sweetheart, why didn’t you say anything sooner?’’

‘’I don’t know,’’ she shrugs, wiping her face, ‘’Dad… I just. I miss her, and I didn’t know her.’’

‘’That’s fine, sweetheart. I should have talked about her before. I Didn't want to upset you, but I guess that I did.’’

‘’I love spending time with Aunt Patricia, I love Aunt Nat.But I just feel like I don’t… I look at DeShawn and his mom, and Olivia and her mom. I want that. ‘’

‘’I know you do,’’ he sighs,kissing her head, ‘’I’m so sorry, Jazzy.’’

‘’It’s okay,dad.’’

‘’It’s not okay, but we will remedy the situation. Tomorrow, I’ll pull out her old pictures. Next time you feel like this, Jazzy, talk to me. You know that I want what’s best for you.’’

‘’I know, daddy. I love you.’’

‘’I love you, too, Jazzy.’’

And the two stay like that for a bit, just spending time with each other, talking between the two of them.

‘’Dad, do you like both Sharon and my teacher?’’

‘’I think I do,yeah,’’ Steve admits, because he’s always been honest with his daughter, ‘’But I’ve got you to think about, too, Jazz. So I won’t rush into anything.’’

‘’Dad, I love you, but… I like them both, too. Sharon is nice and fun, but so is my music teacher. I mean… it would take some getting used to. But I like her, and she won’t be my teacher when I go to middle school next year.’’

Jasmine sees the world for what it is, while also weighing the possibilities. Just like you. And it’s something Steve has already known, and he just now realizes that his daughter is very mhc mature for a ten year old, and he somehow got to witness her transformation into a young lady and missed it in the blink of an eye.

‘’When did you get so smart?’’

‘’I always am. It’s late, dad. I’m going to bed. Love you.’’

‘’Love you, too, Jazzy.’’

So Jasmine heads off to bed, and Steve retires to his own room shortly after, with a plan for tomorrow.

First he’ll get up early and pull out those pictures of Petra to show Jasmine after school. Then, he’ll text Sharon and see if they can talk. Finally, he’ll see you at school, and talk to you.

Steve has learned that he has to accept certain things, but he can fight for what he wants at times, too.

And if it’s meant to be, Steve is sure that it will find a way.

DISCLAIMER- I own no Marvel characters or their fictional worlds, planets, countries, galaxies, etc.

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