why is religious Christmas imagery all so joyful and pleasant? where is the inherent horror of the birth of Christ? A mother is handed her newborn child, wailing and innocent. Her hands come away sticky. Red. Simply by giving her son life she has already killed him. He is doomed from the beginning. Her love will not save him from suffering. Because the thing cradled in her arms is not a baby, it is a sacrifice: born amongst the other bleating animals whose blood will one day be spilled in the name of what demands it. the night is silent with anticipation. Mary, did you know? That your womb was also a grave?
119K notes
·
View notes
Something something let the little children come to me for they will inherit the kingdom of god
9K notes
·
View notes
i absolutely love teenagers. i told a group of them about my work and asked them what their demands for the united nations would be and they debated among themselves and told me to "tell them to make doner kebab three euros again". yeah man i'll ask
14K notes
·
View notes
Tell us the sex stone joke
so this joke requires the light setup of, as the Resident Geologist, on any given hike my dad will have been subjected to a light barrage of Hey What's This Rock I Just Picked Up Off The Trail, answers ranging from "that's clearly serpentinite, the state rock of California—note the distinctive gray-green color and soapy texture" to "that's probably a local mudstone" to "that is a piece of concrete" to "that is tanbark."
the joke typically runs as follows:
you, presenting an interesting pebble for identification: hey, what's this rock i just picked up off the trail?
my dad, after a few seconds of thoughtful examination: ah, interesting. what you have there is what's known as a "sex stone."
you, slightly shocked by the apparent erotic provenance of what you thought was a random rock: oh! okay. i see. thanks.
my dad, slyly: would you like to know why they call it that?
you: um. yes?
my dad: BECAUSE IT'S JUST A FUCKING ROCK.
958 notes
·
View notes
Honestly the story of mlp must be very weird from the pov of a random guy in ponyville, like one day a new antisocial librarian moves into town, and like a year later that librarian ascends into godhood and becomes the new ruler of the entire world
730 notes
·
View notes
wait because seriously being an adult therian fucking rips, especially when you start being independent.
dog with a blog? nah. dog with a JOB. i come into work with my tail and my theta delta necklace and the building implodes from my sheer swag. weirdo teenagers love me. also having your own paycheck means you can get whatever gear/treats you want (once bills are paid, of course - bet youve never heard a dog say that!)
living in your own apartment? well the pet limit is 2 but if i include myself im going over the limit. whoops! good thing i love lying to landlords (fuck landlords). living alone (no roomie) is even better bc theres no one to judge you for your animal habits. i can make a huge den in the living room and who is going to stop me?
i even have my own health insurance. bro. imagine being a dog with medicaid. im climbing the walls and howling and barking. i love being a dog filling out government paperwork.
having your own vehicle? THIS DOG CAN DRIVE! if i feel like going to the lake i can just go to the lake! nobody is stopping me! midnight ride with the windows down to howl at the moon? yes please!!
you can literally just go wherever bro. i moved 11 hours from my hometown to the mountains to feel more at home. i lived in the great plains and now i can just go out for a hike in the rockies and howl at the sky.
being an adult therian slaps so fucking hard i cant wait for the youth to grow up and experience the joy of freedom. yes being an adult is incredibly stressful but if youve been stifled living with family, you get a real chance to develop who you truly are. adult therians i love you im rubbing against your neck and mixing our scents. mwah.
2K notes
·
View notes
Hi. You. Yes you reading this. I'm proud of you. You haven't done anything wrong. You can let go of the thing you're worried about. You can breathe and take a break. You can rest. Love you <3
1K notes
·
View notes
suburban sports goth who said: “wow that’s cool, podcasts are getting really big these days” and who came back into the store to ask the podcasters if they wanted a photo with him for their podcast
(also, the podcasters made a sign for the game with this photo, asking sid to come on the pod, and geno apparently read it and put his stick under sid’s leg to drag him closer to it and sid was like nah brah i’m trying to warm up! this is WAR!!! - so geno gave them stick taps on the glass on his behalf)
486 notes
·
View notes