Tumgik
#Not in order of appearance or anything iam NOT doing that…
garlicboyart · 1 month
Text
Tumblr media
you are all that you make
(old keystone ocs and newer ones, most from a personal project. alt versions/transparent under the cut)
Tumblr media Tumblr media
7 notes · View notes
iamthat-iam · 1 month
Note
https://www.tumblr.com/iamthat-iam/747419238433783808/ppl-think-that-once-they-reach-a-point-of
Okay so what about the anons who tells you now they know and they’re living what they wanted ?
I don’t get what the anon is saying so if we know who we are we’ll continue with the illusion but like a robot ????
I think you misunderstood what they were trying to say.
To sum up their point, this is a philosophy pointing you to your true nature. You have to look within and see for yourself.
Whatever is said is meant to be taken literally. These are not things you experience "after" you know yourself. For example, time is not real. You don't have to see clocks acting weird in order for this to be true, because it's already not real.
Many folks read this and expect some grandiose experience because for them, whatever they are experiencing in the present isn't enough "proof" they are the ultimate authority, that this is all a dream, that there's no past, etc. They take the appearances as proof they aren't living what they want.
We're trying to get you guys out of the cycle of constantly seeking and seeking, looking for a new experience, and looking for change. What is there to change if there is nothing and no one here at all?
No, there has never been a "me" here, but that doesn't make you a robot. You're the only reason why anything appears to exist... how cool is that?? The only reason why you don't take the initiative to 'experience whatever you want' is because you take yourself to be a person with a fixed story, with a solid past, solid circumstances. You take all these things to be factual, and you think you have to take action to "fix" it. You don't understand that nothing is separate from you.
Would an omnipotent being need to do a technique to experience whatever it chooses? Does it need step by step instructions on how to fix something? Of course not.
61 notes · View notes
daisies-daydreams · 6 months
Note
Hi daisy as you said you do oc x canon i had been dying to find a blog like yours and here iam 😌 So I would love to request my oc Lilian I have a drawing of her on a papper but it wont look so good so I will still give a description on her by writing I hope I don't give too many detils but here she is !
Tumblr media
I know it looks so ugly but yeah so she has stawberry pink hair and heterochromia one aqua blue eye and a lignt green eye. And fleckles She is from a skyisland that speaks a ancient language and workship a god she also has a tattoo on the rignt leg that represent the god like this
Tumblr media
She personlity is very cute sweet/kind , naive, curious,shy loves helping people Lilian also loves giving hugs and kisses to her loved ones .But don't be fooled she can use magic her village uses magic like wayer magic telkniss magic too tho.She is pretty short she is 165cm(5,5 ft).But now to the request Lilian has just moved away from her home and family she arrives at town with her suitcase with her belongsing goes to a bar and orders a beer and some bread.But than the red hair pirates come in and sits down.She catchs shanks eyes because of her appearance and her clothes that she is wearing and he goes and sits down beside and starts to chat. By the she joins shanks crew and crew gets to know her and her bakround I hope you understand my request and no this not a love fic just friends.
⚠️But if this is too much detils decilne than.I hope I can request again some time.! Have a amazing day love❤💗!
The Found Voyager (OC!Lilian x Shanks - Platonic)
Pairing: OP!OC!Lilian x Shanks (Platonic) Category: Fluff Warnings: Swearing, Drinking Word Count: 4.2k+
A/N: Hello! Thank you very much for your request! I love the design for Lillian-she looks like a very sweet and headstrong person. I hope you enjoy the story!
Part 2
Tumblr media
Lilian’s long, pink hair whipped in the sea breeze as she took her first step onto the rickety docks of Fairage. Her blue and green eyes sparkled as she heard the unfamiliar crunch of gravel underneath her foot. She ground the flat of her shoe against it, relishing in the fact that after all this time, she finally made it to the World Below. Lilian clutched her hand against her chest as she took a deep breath.
“Look for the shop with the silver fleur-de-lis,” she reminded herself. Her heart thumped as she took another step forward, her mind racing at the different sights and sounds around her. Children holding their mother’s hands, fishermen hollering about their fresh stock, a few dogs barking and rushing around wildly. Her eyes scanned the rows of shops and booths until they landed on a silver symbol.
"I found it!" she squealed internally. Lilian gasped when a man with messy, crimson hair bumped into her. He whipped around and rested his hand on his temple.
“My apologies, miss,” he said with an apologetic smile. Before Lilian could reply, he had already faded into the crowd. She closed her mouth and shrugged before turning to the large, wooden door. She smiled as she opened the squeaky door, a high-pitched ring echoing through the small shop.
"Be out in a second!" a croaky voice called past the rows and rows of stuffed shelves. Lilian parted her lips as she spun around, completely enraptured by the variety of knick-knacks, weapons and other bizarre items that lined the shelves. She gasped when she accidentally bumped into something rough and large. Lilian whipped around, her eyes widening when a massive, hulking man with a bandana over his head raised a brow and grunted.
"I-I'm very sorry, sir!" the young lady said as she held up her hands. A clatter rang out through the room as a curly-haired woman burst out from the back.
"I really need to clean this damn place," she sighed as she dusted off her sleeves. The older woman perked her head up when she noticed Lilian standing in front of the giant man...or more specifically, her large suitcase.
"Ah, welcome to Minerva's Menagerie! Anything Antiques and Pawn Shop ®, " she greeted while motioning towards the counter. Lilian gave the man a small smile before following Minerva. The older woman grunted as she clutched her cane and plopped herself down on a comfy stool. "So, what can I do for you today, dearie?" the shopkeeper asked.
Lilian smiled and heaved her large suitcase onto the counter. Minerva raised a brow as the young lady rummaged through the various items that was tossed around on her journey. She grinned as she triumphantly pulled out a dark, medium-sized bag. Minerva's eyes widened as Lilian pulled out several pieces of fine, sparkling jewelry. The older woman's face nearly lost all color when she saw a necklace adorned with the symbol of the Fairy Goddess.
"I know it's not a lot, but Kumo told me that it's worth a lot-"
She snapped her head towards the large man.
"The shop is closed for a private appointment!" she said as she shuffled towards him.
"What?" he huffed with furrowed brows. She shooed him out with her cane before whipping her head around. "Same goes for the two of you back there! And you better put back whatever you have in your pockets!" Minerva bellowed. Lilian pursed her lips as she heard some muttering followed by clanging.
"Carefully!" the shopkeeper screeched. Two similar, dark-haired looking men tumbled out, one wearing an eyepatch and the other a scar over his chin. They scowled at Lilian before making their way out of the shop. Minerva gave a firm nod as she locked the door behind her. The woman turned back to Lilian.
"Sorry about that," she said as she clasped her hands, her demeanor shifting in the blink of an eye. Lilian gave an uncomfortable expression.
"Did I say something wrong?" she asked. Minerva cackled as she hobbled back to her stool.
"Not at all. It's just been a while since I've heard that old geezers name," she winked as she tapped her cane on the rug. Lilian's lips tightened.
"Well, he told me to come find you and give you these," she breathed as she pushed the jewelry forward. Minerva hummed and stroked her chin, her gaze shifting between the young woman.
"Tell me again...how do you know Kumo?" she asked. Lilian bit the inside of her cheek.
"Oh...friend of a friend?" she said in a high-pitched voice. Minerva pursed her lips.
"I see," she sighed before yanking down a magnifying apparatus from the ceiling. "Now, let’s see what we’ve got here,” the shopkeeper said as she pulled down a magnifying apparatus from the ceiling. The shopkeeper poked her tongue out as she took the delicate necklace into her wrinkled hands.
“Mhm, ah yes, I see,” she hummed. Minerva continued the process until she pulled the apparatus up with a high-pitched creak. She leaned forward on her palms. “I can give you five-hundred Berries for the brooches each…and five thousand for the Fairy Goddess Necklace,” she explained. Lilian’s jaw dropped.
“Five thousand?!" she yelped. Lilian slapped her hands over her mouth. “Sorry-five thousand?!” she whispered loudly. Minerva nodded with a chuckle as she placed the items behind the desk and locked them in a cabinet.
“That’s right," she hummed. Lilian swallowed.
"O-Oh, well...I don't want to take that much from you," she replied sheepishly. Minerva waved her hand.
"Ah, nonsense. I'm sure you just arrived here from Fairygod Island, right?" she asked. Lilian nodded. Minerva clanked her cane against the ground. "Then I'm more than happy to assist a fellow Islander," she beamed. Lilian smiled as the shopkeeper gathered together her cash and handed it to her in a dark, leather bag.
"It was a pleasure meeting you, Miss Minerva," Lilian replied. A loud, gurgling sound suddenly rumbled between them. The young woman's eyes widened as she clutched her stomach. Minerva chuckled.
"If you're hungry, there's a nice pub right across the street," she suggested as she crossed her arms. Lilian hummed as she closed up her suitcase.
"Thank you for the recommendation," she smiled.
“Anytime,” Minerva said. "Hope to see you again soon," she beamed. Lilian returned her grin before hauling her suitcase out the door. Her heart leapt inside her chest as she stepped into the bustling street. The sun had dipped a little past the skyline of the city as she whistled an ancient tune to herself.
She froze when a group of children rushed past her, all of them giggling and carrying colorful pinwheels in their hands. Lilian giggled to herself before she glanced up.
“'The Salty Serpent'," she read as the sign above her gently swayed in the wind. "Sounds lovely!” she chirped as she opened the door. Lilian's eyes widened when a saucer flied towards her. She squeaked and ducked her head as it grazed over her pink loops. The young woman winced as she heard it crash against a brick wall behind her.
“Sorry about the mess! And by mess, I mean this lot,” a young, blue-haired woman called from inside as she gestured to all the men. They all turned their attention to the slender woman standing in the doorway with her suitcase in hand. Lilian gave a polite curtsy before walking inside, sending her bright smile all around the room. One could hear a pin drop, the crowd completely silent as Lilian strode over to an empty stool at the bar. The bartender raised her brow at the man at the piano.
"Well, what'd you stop for?!" she exasperated. The blonde man sat up straight before going back to playing a cheery tune. The pub slowly shuffled back to life as Lilian clasped her hands together. “Haven’t seen you around here before,” the bartender said as she dried out a glass mug. Lilian nodded as she set her suitcase at her feet.
“I just got here today,” she explained with a bright smile. The blue-haired woman hummed as she slung the rag over her shoulder.
“Well, welcome to Fairage, newcomer. Name’s Emilie,” she said as she held out her hand.
“Lilian,” she replied while shaking the other woman's hand. Lilian gasped and laid a hand over her belly as it rumbled.
“You hungry?” Emilie chuckled. Lilian nodded.
“Could I just have some bread and beer please?” she asked.
“That’s all?” Emilie asked with a raised brow. The pink-haired woman nodded again. “Alright then. One bread and beer coming up,” the bartender said before padding towards the rows of bottles. She quickly returned with Lilian’s food.
“Thank you,” she said with a polite smile.
“Sure thing. If ya need anything else, just let me know,” she said. Lilian watched as Emilie busied herself with arranging some glasses. The pink-haired woman brought the mug up to her lips. She furrowed her brows as the bubbly drink washed over her taste buds. Lilian cringed a little at the acidic taste before setting the glass down.
“It’s not for everyone,” Emilie said. The young woman nodded as she took the bread into her hands. She brought it up to her lips and nibbled on it, squishing her fingers together. She happily ate her small snack as the front door suddenly swung open. Lilian jumped in her chair while Emilie rested her hands on her hips.
“Well, well-didn’t think I’d see you around here anytime soon, Shanks,” she lilted. Lilian turned to see a group of men file into the tavern. They were all different heights and sizes, each one more unique than the last. She completely forgot she was still nibbling on her bread until a familiar-looking man slid into the chair next to her. He flashed her a smile.
“Do you always eat like a hamster?” Shanks chuckled. His eyes grew as wide as dinner plates as Lilian tilted her head towards him.
"Hey...you're that woman I ran into earlier," he muttered.
“What’s a hamster?” she disregarded his statement. His jaw dropped as he chortled and slapped his thigh. His smile instantly fell when he saw her serious expression.
“Wait-you’re not joking?” he asked. Lilian shook her head.
“Sorry, I’m from…out of town,” she said while shifting her eyes back and forth. Shanks hummed as he rested his cheek on his palm.
“Really? Where’re you from then?” he asked with genuine intrigue. Lilian nearly choked on her tiny bite. She coughed a few times and cleared her throat.
“Fairygod Island. It's in the sky,” she said with a nervous smile. Shanks blinked before he burst into laughter along with the rest of his crew.
“I like this one! She has a great sense of humor!” he boomed. Lilian couldn’t help but giggle at his exuberant personality. “Emilie, please get our new friend here some beef stew. On me,” the red-haired man smiled. Lilian’s cheeks flushed.
“Y-You don’t have to do that,” Lilian said shyly. Shanks waved his hand.
“It’s no problem at all. Besides, I owe you after bumping into you earlier,” he beamed. Lilian bit the inside of her cheek as she folded her hands in her lap. “Oh and a beer for me as well,” Shanks added.
“I’ll add that to your tab that you’re definitely paying off this time...right?” Emilie asked. Shanks remained stiff as a board. “Right?” the bartender repeated.
“Sure,” he grinned and rubbed the back of his neck.
“You really suck at lying,” Emilie sighed as she shook her head. Shanks chuckled and let his hand fall back to his side.
“I know,” he replied. Emilie narrowed her eyes before she clicked her tongue.
“I’ll be back with the soup,” she said as she pointed her finger at the pirate. He held his hands up in surrender as she shuffled to the kitchen. She soon returned with a piping hot bowl of beef stew and a large mug of beer. Lilian’s eyes sparkled when she saw the hearty meal in front of her.
“Thank you, sir,” she said. Shanks nodded before taking a swig of beer.
“Just Shanks is fine,” he replied. Lilian smiled sheepishly and nodded. She brought the bread up to her lips before gently nibbling on the end, her hands pressed together. The young woman smiled happily and wiggled in her seat as the savory flavor of the soup mellowed inside her mouth. She noticed Shanks staring at her.
“Is something wrong?” she asked with genuine concern. Shanks glanced away before taking a big sip.
“Just thinking,” he said.
“About what?” she asked. Shanks stroked his chin.
“About why a refined young lady such as yourself is wandering around a town like Fairage,” the pirate answered. Lilian squeezed the spoon in her hand.
“Well…it’s a bit of a long story,” the young woman replied as she stirred her meal.
“Good thing I have time to kill, then,” he grinned. Lilian sighed.
“I wanted just to live a normal life. A life away from the pala-from my parents' expectations,” Lilian quickly corrected herself. Shanks adjusted in his seat.
“So, you’re a runaway?” he asked. Lilian nodded, her blue and green eyes growing a bit glossy. The man beside her straightened as she sniffed and wiped the tears from her freckled cheeks.
“I-I’m sorry. I wasn’t expecting to get this emotional,” she laughed quietly. Shank’s brows furrowed. Lilian tilted her head up when he placed a hand on her shoulder.
“Hey, you don’t have anything to be sorry for,” he said softly. Lilian’s heart skipped a beat as she smiled.
“I just…I thought it’d be so easy to leave since I wanted it for so long…but I still miss a lot of people I left behind,” she sighed. Shanks nodded as he patted her shoulder.
“Of course,” he said with a sympathetic smile. Lilian mirrored his expression before she heard the sound of Emilie sighing.
“Man, why can’t I ever keep these things alive?” she frowned as she brushed her fingers over a wilting flower. Lilian tilted her head before looking around. She flicked her free hand beneath the bar. A green glow emitted from her slender fingertips as well as the rose tattoo on her leg. Emilie gasped as the flower straightened out, its original vibrant crimson returning to its petals.
“Oh my goodness!” she yelped and nearly dropped the vase. Everyone turned to look in her direction.
“Now how did that happen?” Shanks wondered aloud as he scratched his head. Lilian shrugged.
“Who knows?” she laughed nervously. The red-haired pirate glanced her way with a pensive expression. He bit the inside of his cheek as everyone gathered around to see the miraculous flower. The Chief shifted in his seat to face her.
“I’m afraid I never got your name,” he said.
“Oh! It’s Lilian,” the young woman smiled and held out her hand. Shanks grinned as he shook her delicate hand, his calloused palm rubbing over hers.
“Pleasure to meet you, Lilian,” he grinned before lowering his hand to his side. He paused for a moment. “Sorry if I come across as rude, but you have no place to stay as of now, right?” Shanks asked. She nodded.
“Yeah, I guess I didn’t think that far ahead,” she replied sheepishly. Shanks hummed as he rubbed his chin.
“Well…what do you think of joining my crew?” he asked. Her eyes widened as time seemed to stand still. “Forgive my bluntness-it’s just…I’d hate it if you were wandering the streets with no one looking out for you,” Shanks explained. Lilian nodded as her heart swelled.
“T-Thank you,” she blushed. Shanks hummed as he scratched his stubbly jaw. He suddenly gained a serious expression.
“Lilian, I’ll be honest with you. Being a part of my crew will not be easy-in fact, it’ll be downright dangerous,” he began. Lilian leaned a bit closer, intrigue pulling her in like a lasso. “There are other pirates, Marines, and all sorts of other groups who want nothing more than our heads,” Shanks stated. She gasped.
“You’re a criminal?” Lilian murmured behind her hands. The pirate chuckled.
“Depends on who you ask,” he said. Lilian pursed her lips before Shanks cleared his throat. “Anyway, it certainly won’t be the “normal” life you were speaking of earlier, but I can tell you this: you’ll never be bored, you’ll get to see incredible sights, and you’ll have even more incredible people to lean on,” he beamed. Lilian smiled as he shifted in his chair a bit more and gazed straight into her heterochromatic eyes.
“So…what do you say?” Shanks asked with an excited grin. The young woman thought to herself for a moment and closed her eyes. She prayed to the Fairy Goddess for guidance before opening them again.
“I’ll go,” she beamed. Shanks’ smile grew even wider as he slapped his thigh.
“Fantastic! Emilie! Let’s have another round to celebrate our newest crew member: Lilian!” he called. The Red-Haired Pirates stared at the pink-haired woman in shock before they came rushing up to her.
“Are you really joining our crew?” a larger man with glasses and a striped cap asked. Lilian nodded.
“Yes sir!” she beamed. The group of men cheered. Her smile grew all the more wider as she looked over the room, her heart feeling lighter than air as she took in the sight of her new friends celebrating. She peeked over at Shanks before leaning over and pressing her lips to his stubbly cheek. He immediately tensed as his face flushed a deep red.
“Thank you,” Lilian smiled as she took his hand into hers. Shanks swallowed thickly.
“Oi Shanks! Your face is looking just as red as your hair!” a man with caramel-colored dreads pointed and laughed. Shanks clenched his jaw.
“Why is your face so red?” Lilian asked. The pirate turned back to her and coughed into his hand.
“Well, it’s just been a while since I’ve been kissed on the cheek by a pretty woman like yourself,” he explained. The tips of Lilian’s ears burned.
“Oh my goodness! I-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that,” she flushed. Shanks tilted his head as Lilian bit her lip. “You see, where I’m from, a kiss on the cheek is how we greet friends, and holding hands is how we show that our friendship is an everlasting bond,” the young woman explained. His face slowly returned back to its normal color as he sighed.
“Understood,” he chuckled as he took a sip of his beer. The crew came up to Lilian and asked her all sorts of questions (many of which she dodged with answers provided to her by Kumo). Eventually, the rowdiness died down as they all had their share of beer. Emilie held her hand out.
“The tab,” she said with raised brows. Shanks grumbled as he pulled out a few bills and handed it over. Emilie gave a firm nod as she counted the money. The red-haired man nudged Lilian’s elbow and leaned over.
“I’d be happy to show you around your new home and help you get settled in,” he whispered. Lilian beamed as she took his hand into hers, drawing another blush from his cheeks.
“I’d love that,” she replied with a sweet smile.
+++
There was more drinking when the crew returned to the Red Force...a lot more drinking. The crewmembers sang songs and stumbled around the decks as Lilian watched with another mug in hand. Shanks wandered over to her and took a swig of sake. He sniffed and wiped his lips with the back of his hand.
"You want to try?" he asked. She vigorously shook her head. "Suit yourself," the Chief shrugged before taking another sip. He hummed as she rubbed her hands together. "Something wrong?" he asked. Lilian glanced over and bit her lip.
"Could we find a place that's a bit more private? I...I need to tell you something," she said with a shaky breath. Shanks blinked before setting his sake down.
"Sure. Follow me," he replied. He led her past the rowdy men towards his quarters. Lilian's heart thrummed in her ears as she stepped inside, the room dimly lit with candles.
"So, what did you want to tell me?" Shanks asked with a casual smile as he folded his arms. Lilian took a deep breath.
"You know how I said that I was from an island in the sky?" she asked. Shanks nodded.
"Yep," he replied. The woman sighed as she played with the red-beaded bracelet on her wrist.
"Well...what if I told you I wasn't joking?" Lilian asked. There was a short pause.
"I'm sorry...what?" the Chief asked as he lowered his arms to his sides. Lilian curled and uncurled her fists before standing up straight.
"It's true. I just arrived her today on my hippogriff," she said as she squeezed her eyes shut. Shanks blinked.
"Oooookay..." he said incredulously. Lilian sighed.
"Listen, I know it sounds crazy, but I'm telling the truth!" she said as her shoulder slumped. "Kumo told me people would think I'm crazy if I told them," she groaned.
"Who's Kumo?" Shanks asked. Lilian turned around.
"He's my bu-best friend," she said. The Chief hummed and crossed his arms.
"I see-and I don't think you sound crazy. I've always known the Sky Islands as only myths," the man explained.
"Oh," Lilian said as she glanced down at her feet. There was short pause between the two.
"Anything else I need to know about you?" he quickly changed the subject at the sign of her uncomfortable expression. Lilian hummed.
"Well...I do have some magical skills," she said in a muffled voice. Shanks leaned closer.
"What was that?" he asked. Lilian sucked in a sharp breath.
"I-I can do some magic," she said a bit louder. The red-haired man's eyes widened.
"You mean...at the Serpent today, when Emilie's plant grew back...that was you?" he asked. Lilian flushed and nodded.
"Yes! I can also perform water magic," she explained with a bright smile. Shanks raised a brow.
"Prove it," he said. Lilian blinked.
"What?" she asked. Shanks walked over to his desk and pulled out a glass flask. He set it down on his desk with a heavy clank.
"Push the cap off of this flask with your magic," he said. Lilian glanced back and forth between him and the flask before gulping.
"O-Okay. You might want to stand back though," she said. Shanks did as she said before she planted both of her feet firmly on the floor. She narrowed her eyes as she held her hand out. Her rose tattoo began to glow a light blue in tandem with her fingertips as she maintained her eye contact on the glass flask. The object shook violently before suddenly exploding. Lilian gasped as the glass shards tumbled throughout the room.
"I'm so sorry! Are you okay?!" she yelled. Shanks looked down at the mess at his feet, a few pieces of glass merely sticking to the outside of his clothes. He chuckled.
"Miss Lilian, you are full of surprises," the Chief grinned as he dusted himself off. Lilian blushed and smiled before helping him clean up the mess. She frowned when she saw a red mark across his hand.
"Your hand," she muttered. Shanks looked down and laughed.
"That's nothing, trust me," he said as he rummaged through his drawers and pulled out a small box. The Chief pulled out some bandages with his single hand.
"Here, let me," Lilian urged as she rested her hand over his. Shanks looked into her eyes and smiled softly.
"If you insist," he grinned as she sank into his chair. She pulled out the small pieces of glass before disinfecting the wound. "That tattoo on your leg...does it always glow when you use your magic?" Shanks asked. Lilian looked down at her right leg and nodded.
"Yes-it's from a pact our family made with the ancient Fairy Goddess," she elaborated. The Chief hummed as she wrapped a bandage around his hand. "She watches over all aspects of nature, whether it be the soil of the World Below or the water in the clouds," Lilian continued.
"The World Below?" Shanks asked. She paused.
"Yes...that is what this plane is called, right?" Lilian asked. Shanks chuckled and shook his head.
"Well, we call it 'Earth' down here," he said with a cheeky grin. Her cheeks burned as she closed the lid of the kit.
"Oh, I see," she said as embarrassment flooded through her.
"Hey, you didn't know. Unless you're trying to give your new Chief a hard time," he winked. She held up her hands.
"Of course not!" she squeaked. Shanks laughed.
"I'm just messing with you," he jested. Lilian gave a small laugh before yawning.
"Well, I'm feeling rather exhausted, so I think I'll turn in for the night," Lilian said. Shanks grunted.
"Sure thing," he replied. Lilian gave a small curtsy before taking a few steps. Her eyes widened when the Chief grasped her hand. She slowly turned to see his warm smile.
"I never properly told you...Welcome to the Red-Haired Pirates," he beamed. Lilian smiled as he squeezed her hand.
"Thank you for letting me join your crew, Chief Shanks," she said.
----
Thank you for reading! 💖
A/N/N: Stay tuned for Part 2!
Taglist: @maybethatfanfictionwriter @depressesoespressorat @yuhhtricki999 @lavenderbabu @tayleighuh @thedevax @famouscattale @spktrgantenk @zombieblogx @mrswhitethornbelikov @migueloharastruelove @galaxy-dusk @samanthadusk @theloneshadow24 @xxkay15xx @inspace1 @manlikemilesmyguy @ghostslynx @synamonthy @oharasfilipinawife @scaleniusrm @jotarossshark
Want to be a part of my taglist? Comment down below!
8 notes · View notes
Text
Tumblr media
To We the People, There are traitors and there are whistleblowers. Sometimes there is a fine line in-between. Sometimes there is even an overlap. In the final analysis, the determining factor as to which is which centers on loyalty and intent, i.e. did the “traitor” intend to destroy our country or did he intend to save it. Final judgment of Edward Snowden as to whether or not he is a traitor to our/his country must be based on this. 
I believe Edward Snowden is a whistleblower and not a traitor. He may be even a hero from one point of view. God only knows how far down the thorny path to tyranny our government would have taken us, if not for Edward Snowden. Secrecy and the classification of information in our country (in my opinion) have gone too far beyond the need for national security. One’s political security isn’t covered by the law. I submit to you that the power(s) of the NSA have been significantly abused to the detriment of our democracy, at times leaving even our Congress out of the “Loop”.
While I’m writing this, I want to make one additional observation. In legalese, there are the terms, de jure and de facto. De jure means “according to the law”, the way things are supposed to be. De facto means “in fact or in practice”, the way it’s really done or works in practice. What does this have to do with anything? It has to do with everything! I take exception with those who claim that Snowden had other courses which he could pursue in order to call this problem to the attention of government. Right—in terms of de jure, he did. Wrong!—in terms of de facto, he did not.
Did any of you read the recent article (last week) in the New York Times concerning the alleged abuse of employees by Amazon? Mr. Bezos, CEO of Amazon, responded by requesting his employees to report the abuses to management and they would be “looked into” (not good English—paraphrased, but you get the idea, I’m sure). Check out Amazon.com on Wikipedia and “click on” item 13.2, Working Conditions. It appears their problem with working conditions began in 2011. This is 2015. Do you really believe their de jure system for reporting to the top is working? From other cases about which I have read, it appears we aren’t enforcing the whistleblower laws we presently have on the books—so much for that other route to reporting.
Thank you, Edward Snowden. You have done a service to your country. When you came into office, Mr. President Obama, you promised transparency in government. I presume, consistent with your promise, you are in agreement with me.
From: Elder Steven P. Miller @ParkermillerQ, Founder of Gatekeeper-Watchman International Groups Jacksonville, Florida., Duval County, USA. Instagram: steven_parker_miller_1956, Twitter: @GatekeeperWatchman1, @ParkermillerQ, https://twitter.com/StevenPMiller6 Tumblr: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/gatekeeperwatchman, https://www.tumblr.com/gatekeeper-watchman Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ElderStevenMiller https://www.facebook.com/StevenParkerMillerQ #GWIG, #GWIN, #GWINGO, #Ephraim1, #IAM, #Sparkermiller,#Eldermiller1981
2 notes · View notes
orcodessy · 2 years
Text
By the way .after zain company lie on me today .of course .its not for me to can end it in all Iraq and delete or cut head who did this lie . To can other benifit from this . Of course i can't do anything cause spy devil own it not me . And its Same thing .that i faced when i leaft Iraq Iraq after two i know . And those two .didn't come .of course i don't control by them. To can punished them ..but in fact i needed this hard experience .to shocking myself to wake up .And use my ways .and never changed .what ever it be .the game of wife and biosexul guy is over .no more shameful way . Its bring shame to me only. How i wanted Iraq be with my brothers countries .and shuold looking for a wife to spy devil . I didn't have married office . Also i shy from womens from my brothers countries to tell .this unbelievable story . That i wanted her to married spy devil in Iraq to can take his organization and let him leave his wifes in Iraq . .its shameful . Also i don't need this .i end this talk .About me .if i need millions girl's from my brothers countries .i can order my special forces .. but i just wanted a women from my brothers countries for this terrorism evil . To take his organization . But i failed .to find any one . Again my new plan started. And i announced i will ignored any one from internet or phones companies . Anything any attempts . I will ignored. I use my only in Iraq . Don't say i didn't tell . And zain lie today never repeated . If zain trying to repeated i will ignored even if they became truly. Also even if those two whom didn't come decided to appear or be real .i will ignored. Its me to whom didn't know me . I given chance to other not other give me chance. I choose time .not other inforecd time on .me . Zain just take other and legs up head only .and i give one scond if they didn't do .punishment only will be . And this with all . If any one didn't like . I don't tie his leg by chains . Let him go with terrorism . I have my special forces not need any thing any one .and about my satution in Iraq .and no money . I have .and zain and other luagh on my mind .by let me smell a prize and didn't give
Or iam no house .and they trying to pressure on me .by some water or little food .or even recharge mobile . Extra from ugly things
Also this not mean anything . After this who became angry from this talk .let him .no sorry or begged to return. My ways only .no any thing else . My words only . My laws .only . No one give himself orders .no one use hid or unseen test. He will lose his head with trial .if any one think to do this . Also no love in war .cause this organization not respectable its terrorism gangs attcked my brothers coalitions troops in Iraq.. any love or wich mind of love some one fool expected inside . No bet or gambling .
5 notes · View notes
samgtt700 · 3 years
Text
The Will of Time
Chapter Eight
Previous Chapters: One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six, Seven
Tags: @wildsayeed, @made-me-deep-blue, @iam-the-fuckin-queen, @evexofxtime, @kamilah-sayeed-let-me-love-you, @h-doodles, @playallthechoices, @kamilahforever, @kamilahsayeet2063, @kamilah-the-bloodqueen, @helpconfusedpersonhere, @scarlet-letter-a0114, @nydeiri, @tigerbryn11, @lifesadance96, @paodequeijofeliz-blog, @belvoiresqueenbee, @lifesadance96, @nighthuntresskatherine, @ayushixo, @jellomello2akast, @nell-crainxx, Let me know if you want to be added or if I’ve missed you!
A/N: sorry for the 141 day wait. It’s been a rough few months for me but I’m feeling good, I’m in a good place and I would to thank my followers and fans for their patience. You lot have needed it for this wait. But enjoy and I promise the next chapter will have much less of a wait time. I have big plans so stay tuned!
Kamilah’s nails scratched at the floor weakly, her nails broken and brittle. Trying to move into the corner to avoid the sunlight in her pitch black prison cell. Her eyes stinging as the sunlight hit her face. The chains dragging behind her, bloodying her ankles.
‘Kamilah... where is your brother?’ Dorian asked, his voice echoing in the darkness.
Kamilah managed to sit up, pulling herself into the darkness. ‘If I knew. I still wouldn’t tell you.’ She sneered back, gritting her teeth.
‘Tsk tsk.’ Dorian tapped his foot into the ground, the metal in his leather boots rattling. ‘Not the answer I was after again. You could end your suffering.’
‘I will always suffer for my family.’ Kamilah wouldn’t hesitate to protect her family no matter the personal cost to herself.
Dorian opened his palm, flames engulfing his hand. Heating the carving blade in his palm Gaius handed him. ‘You know what to do.’ Dorian nodded to Gaius. ‘They will come for her and they will die for their mistake.’
Alice shot up, sweat dripping down her body, her breathing rapid, her chest pounding. Her hand touching her temple, a vision unlike anything she had seen before. As if it she was peering in on the present, rather than the past. She could feel the pain Kamilah was experiencing as the visions continued to occur whilst she was awake. Feeling the carving knife, the hairs on the back of her neck standing up as her body tensed up.
‘You can save her Alice.’ Dorians voice lingered, a foul odour in the air that the cold egyptian wind wouldn’t whisk away.
‘Enough.’ Alice shouted in her mind. Startling Dorian as she got up and walked across the room, blocking him out. Sliding down the wall outside for some space. Needing to calm down. The anxiety of her past creeping back in, would she be enough to save the ones she loved.... it still played in the back of her mind now, unable to save Jax that day. His sacrifice a reminder of the burden placed upon her shoulders. The discovery of her heritage had explained so much about her powers, but also left her with more questions.
‘You look like hell.’
Alice turned. Lysimachus holding a cup of what she hoped was coffee. ‘Is that coffee?’
‘I do not have coffee but this is something Adrian gave me.’ He sat down beside her.
Alice took a small sip before smiling, giggling to herself, remembering all the times Kamilah had a bottle of bourbon with her despite it seeming impossible. ‘I think bourbon at this hour is not appropriate. Not for breakfast.’
‘Is this not breakfast drink?’ Lysimachus stared into the cup. ‘It is good.’
‘Not for everyone.’ Alice handed Lysimachus back the cup. ‘Not this early.’
Lysimachus tried to get up but groaned. ‘How bad?’
‘You need something you can’t get here in your time.’ Alice answered. ‘We call them a hospital. Not that we like to go to them.’
Lysimachus nodded. ‘I’ll be ok. Trust me. Survived worse. Just need to keep moving.’ Alice taking his hand in a tight grip, not wanting to be alone and wanting to let her wife sleep in. ‘You know more about my family than a stranger should. How do you know so much about my sister and I?’
‘This won’t make sense but your sister...’ Alice glanced at Kamilah. ‘Is sleeping over in that bed. She isn’t the sister we were with before though.’
‘Just tell it to me straight Alice.’ Lysimachus asked.
Alice nodded. ‘You died. And Kamilah’s my wife, she was turned by Gaius in this time. She’s been through so much but when she talks of you. She gets this faraway look. Like she’s reliving all the memories of you.’
Lysimachus glanced in Kamilah’s direction. ‘What happened to me?’
‘You died in battle from what I know.’ Alice knew only little snippets of Lysimachus, but this time with him she began to understand her wife so much more. ‘This time I’ve spent with you, with your family. I’ve learnt so much.’
Lily and Cal walked up. Stopping as Alice turned to them, lysimachus staring at them oddly. ‘Who are they?’
‘Is he speaking- omg that is awesome. He’s speaking ancient Egyptian!’ Lily squealed.
Adrian walked up. ‘How’s the bourbon?’
‘Not breakfast appropriate apparently.’ Lysimachus softly chuckled. ‘It’s amazing.’
‘He’s definitely a Sayeed.’ Adrian laughed to himself, rubbing the back of his neck before loosening his tie. ‘We’ll need to be properly introduced over a bottle of bourbon when all this is over.’
‘Everyone ok?’ Alice asked.
‘Your blood.’ Adrian handed Alice a bag of blood, ‘and Dorian-’
‘I dreamt of him.’ Alice sighed. ‘He had Kamilah, badly injured. She was being tortured but I could feel her pain. We were linked.’
‘Maybe human Kamilah. It would explain the poorly written tattoo on Kamilah’s arm?’ Lily pointed out as some writing appeared on Kamilah’s skin. ‘He’s writing a location and time on her skin.’ Lily read it. ‘The royal palace. Dusk. Alice, Lysimachus and Kamilah.’
Adrian woke Kamilah. ‘Morning.’ He pulled her arm out to read. ‘This is fascinating how he’s manipulating time. I’ve never seen anything like this, not even in my time with Gaius. None of this makes sense.’
‘It’s obviously a trap.’ Lily said.
‘You think?’ Kamilah stood, putting her jacket on. Seeing her brother stare strangely at her. ‘It’s been a long time.’
Adrian glanced at Lily. ‘Shall I tell the others?’
‘Can you Ask Serafine to come up, I need to talk to her.’ Kamilah asked.
Alice got up, walking over and squeezing Kamilah’s hand. ‘I’ll give you two a minute.’
‘Thank you.’ Kamilah teary eyed reply did not go unnoticed as Alice wiped a tear on her cheek. Kamilah leant in and kissed Alice, slow and deep. ‘I love you.’
‘I love you too.’ Alice let Kamilah go. ‘I’ll prepare my weapons.’
Kamilah nodded, watching Alice walk away before hearing a chuckle. ‘No wonder she gave me such funny looks.’
Kamilah turned to her brother, moving to sit on the edge of his bed. ‘She hasn’t told me much of your time together but if I remember what we use to get up to. I’d say she enjoyed herself.’
‘What happened to me?’
‘You were stabbed in battle. Fighting the romans. By then. Cleopatra was grasping at straws for power and all her allies had abandoned her but us two remained. Loyal to our cousin.’ Kamilah explained. ‘Learning of your death. It was one of the hardest moments in my life. But I grew stronger for it, like every difficult moment.’
‘Alice. She’s too good for you.’ Was all Lysimachus answered with. Laughing.
Kamilah smirked. ‘Hands off.’
‘Don’t think I could win if I tried. That woman only has eyes for you. Even ah, other you noticed it?’ Lysimachus was a little unsure, everything had changed and he had zero understanding of it. ‘So... we’ve been-’
‘Yes. I won’t lose you again.’ Kamilah wouldn’t go through it again, she wouldn’t allow herself to lose her brother all over again after just getting him back. ‘We’ll figure it out.’
‘There isn’t anything to figure out. I am dead where your from and you’ve made it just fine without me. You know what you have to do.’ Lysimachus didn’t mince words. ‘Use me as bait and leave me to die. Get Alice, yourself and... yourself out?’
Kamilah smirked before shaking her head, sighing aloud. ‘You are not playing the hero. We all go home. Together.’
Lysimachus grasped her hand. ‘I won’t be the cost of your happiness.’
‘I just got you back.’ Kamilah sat. Staring into his eyes. ‘It’s been over two thousand years since I last sat in front of you.’
Lysimachus pulled his sister into a hug. ‘And you’ll be fine for the next two thousand years without me.’
Kamilah didn’t want to sacrifice her brother. She didn’t want to lose him again after just getting him back. ‘I won’t lose you. Not again.’
‘Kamilah...’ Serafine coughed into her hand, breaking the twins apart. Kamilah stood and straightened her suit. ‘Sorry to interrupt but you wanted-’
‘Ah yes.’ Kamilah stepped over. Glancing back at Lysimachus, ‘I suggest you suit up for battle brother.’ She nodded to him. ‘The rest of you will need to get in unnoticed pass the guards. Alice, Lysimachus and I will go through the front door.’
‘You want us to sneak in I’m assuming?’ Serafine asked.
‘Yes. I have the palace in my head. You need to access and use it.’ Kamilah asked. ‘Please Serafine, I want to keep my family-’
‘No need, mom amie, we are family.’ Serafine pressed her hand into Kamilah’s shoulder, an unspoken message between the two as serafine accessed what she needed to. Their wasn’t words needed between old friends, between family. ‘Good luck Kamilah. Be safe.’
Kamilah made her way downstairs to the others, all preparing for battle. Alice sharpened her blade in the corner by Lily who checked her crossbow was in working order. ‘Lily.’
Lily saw the glance Kamilah gave her on approach. ‘Got ya.’ She scurried away to give them privacy. Alice standing and putting her blade aside.
‘You okay?’
‘I need to ask something of you.’
‘You know you can ask anything of me...’ Alice gigged. ‘I’m not your wife just for flattery.’
Kamilah shook her head before lifting Alice’s chin, their eyes meeting. ‘If you have the chance. Get Lysimachus and human me out. I will find my own way out.’
‘Kamilah...’ Alice sighed, grasping Kamilah’s hand and gently squeezing. ‘We save everyone together.’
‘Just promise-’ Kamilah pleaded as her hand caressed Alice’s cheek, ‘I can’t lose my brother again.’
‘And we won’t.’ Alice rested her hand over Kamilah’s. ‘We will walk out together because we know it’s a trap. But Lysimachus and you know this battlefield better than them. They think your walking into their trap but use it against them.’ She pressed her lips to Kamilah’s, her eyes falling shut as her lips explored Kamilah’s, nibbling at Kamilah’s lower lip and feeling her rapid heartbeat as she pulled back breathless.
‘You two ready?’ Lysimachus stood behind them, his white uniform standing out in the crowd, his leather armour strapped into place. His curved egyptian sword strapped to his side, ‘be like old times for us.’
Kamilah nodded, stepping over to Lysimachus, adjusting the same strap she always had. ‘If it gets too much. Tell us.’
‘I’ll be okay.’ Lysimachus answered, slapping his sisters hand away. ‘Stop fussing over me. I’m not bloody Cleopatra.’ He walked out first.
Alice smirking before following her wife outside. Mounting her horse before Kamilah jumped up behind her, wrapping an arm around her waist. ‘I love you.’ She glanced behind her to Kamilah whose only response was to pull herself closer. Tightening her grip on Alice.
‘I love you too.’ Her words were whispered in Alice’s ear, meant only to be heard by her.
——————————————————————————————
Alice dismounted at the Royal palace, guards escorting them to the main doors. Kamilah and her sharing a glance before entwining their hands, a gentle squeeze the only reminder they needed to know they were in this together. This was their fight, and they had each other’s back to the end of time.
‘Hand your weapons over.’
‘You don’t need our weapons.’ Alice played with their minds, walking inside ahead of the other two.
‘Did she just-’ Lysimachus couldn’t believe his eyes as the guards walked off. Kamilah not batting an eye at it. He quickly followed. Struggling for breath but hiding it from his sister. Not wanting her to worry as they entered. Guards and servants alike leaving as Alice spared a glance in their direction. Worried what was to come as it almost emptied on their way to the throne room.
Cleopatra sat on her throne, Gaius and Dorian flanking her. Her wine goblet full of fresh blood, it trailed down her lips, drinking it openly, caring little for their opinions as the dead servant provided her foot rest.
‘Cousins.’ She licked her lips. ‘You don’t look like you’ve aged well Kamilah.’ Kamilah clenched her fists but didn’t respond when Alice gently squeezed her wrist. ‘Your just in time for tonight’s entertainment.’
Lysimachus stepped forward. Hand on his sword, ‘tonight’s entertainment?’
Cleopatra raised her hand. Two guards escorting human Kamilah out. ‘The death of the Sayeed bloodline.’
‘I’m very much alive and plan to be tomorrow.’ Kamilah finally spoke. ‘We have no quarrel with you cousin.’
‘You are in my kingdom. My world.’ Cleopatra stood. Gaius twisting his lips in a smug smirk. ‘You will bend to my will, or die.’
‘I don’t bend to anyone’s will.’ Kamilah stood defiant.
‘Nor do I.’ Lysimachus nodded to her.
‘My parents should have had you two killed the day your father revolted against us. But they saw you two as innocents.’ Cleopatra sneered, ‘you have traitors blood. But they swept it under the rug.’
‘Liar!’ Human Kamilah spat at the ground towards Cleopatra.
Dorian screwed his fist, human Kamilah falling to her knees in agony, holding her hand. Alice glanced at her wife, seeing her eyes close tight, trying to block out the pain, her past reminding her of the intense pain she went through, how she held out despite how much it felt like her head was going to explode. Alice couldn’t stand to watch the pain her loved one was in.
‘Enough!’ Alice stepped forward, Dorian knocking Kamilah unconscious with one final blast, her body crumbling to the ground. ‘You called us here! For what?! For you to parade around like your someone important. History doesn’t take kindly to you!’
Gaius glared. “She is my queen.”
‘Thank god I’m not your queen anymore.’ Kamilah felt a chill down her spine still hearing those words.
‘Your mine.’ Alice winked at her.
‘I can feel my blood through your veins. You disgusting filth.’
Alice pulled out her blade. Sharp and reflecting in the moonlight. ‘Enough of your bullshit Gaius. Your no god. Or king. Just ashes to be reclaimed by the Earth.’ She stood in front of the Sayeed twins ready for whatever was to come.
‘You sure about that?’ Dorian smirked. Serafine dragged out in chains beside the others, each of them bloodied and beaten, Adrian’s difficulty to breath, feeling how broken his body was. Lily’s side burnt by fire, how desperate they were for blood, like it had been sucked out of them, the goodness and essence of it, unlike anything she had seen before. Cal’s fur torn up as he was tossed like a rag doll to the ground, turning back into a human, his body littered in bruises, Katherine helping Alex in, unconscious and heavily bleeding. Whatever back up plan to get them out was gone, they only way out now was through Dorian Cleopatra and Gaius. They had to die or they would, the terms were simple and there was no negotiating with the enemy, no pleading or begging. ‘You want to kill everyone you care about? You want to watch everyone you love die?’
Alice noticed Nik was missing, the only member of the team absent. She wasn’t sure what to make of it, but knew he was in the palace somewhere.
‘Well?’ Gaius pulled out his blade with his only arm, ready for a fight. Ready to make the kill.
Alice hesitated. Staring down Dorian approaching, flames rising from his hands. His soldiers appearing from the shadows, ready for a fight. Serafine managing to get to her hands and knees, nodding to her. Her voice echoing in her mind. ‘Stop him... at any cost.’ Alice tightened the grip on her blade, her knuckles whitening. Her breath unsteady and her heart pounding but then she felt the calming presence beside her as her daggers unsheathed together. And then Lysimachus pulling out his Egyptian sword and scraping it along the palace floor. The Sayeed family would fight together. For their family. For their home.
Dorian sneered before gritting his teeth. ‘You choose death then.’
51 notes · View notes
twinkleallnight · 4 years
Text
Marshmallow
(Part-11) Happy Birthday!
Book: The Royal Romance
Pairing: Drake x Hana, Liam x Riley
For previous chapters: catch up here
Prompt 1: This fic is my submission for this week’s #WackyDrabbles. The prompt is: I’m your [friend, spouse, partner, etc] of course I care. (appears in bold)
Prompt 2: This is a submission for @choicesweeklychallenge . The prompt is: 'What do you want me to do?’ (appears in bold)
Warnings: mention of cancer , loss of parent.
Tags: @ao719 @aloneautumn @bebepac @charlotteg234 @choicesficwriterscreations @choiceskatie @cordonia-gothqueen @cordonianroyalty @daisydancer12385 @drakewalker04 @gardeningourmet @gkittylove99 @glaimtruelovealways @kat-tia801 @hopefulmoonobject @hopelessromanticmonie @iam-the-kind-and-thoughtful @idontknowwhysblog-blog @islandcrow @jovialyouthmusic @jaxsmutsuo @kingliam2019 @lovablegranny @mrswalkers-blog @mom2000aggie @no-one-u-know @ntoraplayschoices @princessleac1 @ritachacha @speedyoperarascalparty @texaskitten30 @queenrileyrose @sanchita012 @shanzay44 @theroyalheirshadowhunter @wackydrabbles @xpandabeardontcarex @yourmajesty09
Tumblr media
“Let’s take a walk.” Liam says solemnly.
Its late in the evening, the sky is changing to darker shades and so are our lives. Liam is dealing with his own issues; I am handling mine. Both of us are on crossroads in our respective lives, unsure, where to go from here. He has been with his father for past two hours, and the meeting seems to have left him gloomy.
We start walking to the hedge maze, across the lawns of the palace. The maze, that held the carefree moments of our lives. The maze, where we hid as the royal palace hosted courtly affairs. The difference now is, there are no more carefree moments nor we are young enough to hide away from all our problems.
The pink trumpet tree stands tall in the centre. I slow down, as we round off, while Liam plods towards the tree. He hugs it and suddenly I see his shoulders shaking, tears streaming down his cheeks. It’s been years since I saw him this broken.
I take quick steps to be with him. “What’s the matter Liam?” I gently pat on his shoulder. He usually hugs this tree whenever he misses his mother. She planted this tree long back. Liam lost her when we were 9 years old.
King Constantine soon got a queen to rule besides him when he married Regina but Liam never got a replacement. He respects Queen Regina but misses the warmth in the relationship.
“Liam! You are killing me. What’s wrong?”
“He is… he is….”
“Who?”
Liam takes a deep breath and straightens up. “No, I should not burden you with all this.”
I pull him away from the tree and turn him to face me. “Liam, I’m your friend, of course I care. So, please you need to speak up.”
Liam props down reclining on the tree trunk. I follow and sit beside him. He starts with a deep sigh, “Father… he is suffering from lung cancer.” I give him a shocked look and he gives an agonizing stare “And he doesn’t have much time.”
My eyes are fixed on him as he fills me in with more information. When he concludes the details, I start with a heavy heart. ““Liam…I know there is no comparison but I want you to remember when I lost my dad.”
It was devastating incident for both of us. My father was head of the king's guard and died while defending the king, that is Liam’s father. We were kids then and Liam wouldn’t stop apologising. But that was not what I wanted him to recollect.
I turn to him and clasp his shoulders, shaking him to gain his attention. “I never got a chance to say goodbye, Liam! You have him right here. Do all you can for him while he is still here. And who knows the treatment may work wonders for him. These things are unpredictable.”
We both know that the last part of what I said, is a false hope but hope is all we have now.
We keep sitting there till the sky gets darker and our talks and thoughts get muddled up. Somewhere in between we get up and lumber off to our rooms. It’s decided that we won’t be talking about it to anyone. Liam plans to call up his elder brother Leo and ask him to come back to Cordonia soon.
Next few days are spent in preparation of the Apple blossom festival. The ‘Cordonian ruby' apples form the main revenue generating exports of the country. The royal family hosts the festival every year at their Applewood country manor. It has the largest apple orchard of Cordonia. The king makes sure to attend this one in person, to show his gratitude to the apple growers and the farmers, preserving the noble traditions.
Liam has got back into his stoic demeanour and court duties. No one realises his internal struggles. He has travelled with the suitors to Applewood, a day before the event, while I stay back at the palace.
I miss my dad more every year at this time of the year. We had a family tradition of attending the first day of the festival, and then camping away on higher altitude with him.
I get a call from Liam on the day of festival, at around noon. “Hey, can you come over to Applewood?”
“Anything urgent, Liam?”
“Yes, I need your help.”
“I will be there.” I don’t give it a second thought. I am worried about Liam since the last event. I pack quickly and drive down. As I am nearing my destination, I get another call from Liam. “I am almost there, Liam.” I answer hurriedly.
“I called you for that. I don’t want you to go to the manor. I am sending you my location. Meet me there.”
I set up my GPRS to the said location which strangely, seems to be some club. It’s quite unlikely to find Liam at some random club.
I reach the place in some time, park my truck and rush inside. But the scene inside is much different than my expectation. Max is sitting on a mechanical bull and Riley, Hana and Liam are all cheering up.
I am standing baffled, not realising that my mouth is hung open until Riley sashays towards me and pushes my chin up. “Welcome to the paaarrrty” she shouts over the music.
Liam follows her giving me a hug, and says in a hushed tone, in my ear. “ Happy birthday Bro!”
As he moves away, I give him a glare. He knows I never like talking about it, leave aside celebrating it! “You…told…?”
“No, not exactly. We just sneaked out to have some fun. What a coincidence!” He waves off.
Riley drags me to the bar. I perch myself on a stool next to her. She orders our drinks and as we say cheers she leans in, “Happy birthday!” My mouth remains open and no words form while I keep gazing at her, stupefied. She repeats her gesture and tugs my chin up. “ Don’t mention!” She winks. I shake my head, and close my eyes in disbelief.
“He told you, didn’t he?
“May be...” Riley shrugs. “ Relax and enjoy!”
She shimmies down to where Liam is standing. He throws his head back laughing out but starts moving with her. Max joins them while Hana extracts herself from the crazy dance.
I get up and slide down with her in the neighbouring booth. “You are not dancing?”
“ You call that freestyle, dancing?” Hana giggles.
“That is Max’s breakdance for you.” I grin back at her.
“I can’t dance like that. I just know the dances I am trained for. What about you?”
“Not my cup of tea.”
We both are looking at the trio on the dancefloor when Hana suddenly says, “Hey, Happy birthday to you!”
“ I can’t believe this!” I throw my hands in the air.
“Excuse me?”
“ Liam told all of you, when he knows how much I hate it.”
“But I see you are enjoying it.” Hana shrugs.
“I mean I find it odd, mentioning it, and then hese wishes… everyone wishing, I don’t know what to say.”
“Thank you.”
“What?”
‘'You say thank you, Drake! They love you. Look at the brighter side. They are all here for you. I have never had such fun filled birthday.”
“I am sorry. Its just that this is all different, like a changed world for me.”
“ A good change.” She responds. She seems to have some plan up her sleeve. She stretches out a hand, “ Get up.”
“What do you want me to do?”
“I didn’t ask you last time. Now it’s my turn. Come with me.”
I place my hand in her tiny palm, and she steps out of the backdoor, and I follow. Its quaint out there as compared to the loud music inside the club. The backside of the countryside club seems to be facing a large grazing land. There is no building, no vehicle, no one around. Only the moonlight beaming down on us, making Hana's pink sequinned dress shimmer some more.
She places my one hand on her waist and holds up the other hand. She slides her slender fingers in my upheld hand. She closes the distance between us. She lifts her eyelids and I find loosing myself into the depth of her eyes.
“Hana…” I swallow a lump in my throat, “ I can’t… I have never done this.”
“Shhh…Follow me.”
I am clumsy at it but she gets a perfect grip of my movements. She sways, and without any effort, she moves me swiftly with her. I have no idea what form of dance we are doing. There is no music, just our breathing giving us a rhythm to follow.
The night seems to be melting into the honey almonds of her eyes. The breeze blows her dark brown tresses, ever so lightly. The chill in the air brings us closer. The soft touch of her hands, one in my hand and the other on my shoulder, relaxes not just my body but seems to be calming my soul. I lose the track of time once again when I embrace her warmth.
The ringtone of my phone brings us back to the present. I fumble with the device before swiping my finger to accept Liam's call “I... I am right outside the club, Liam.”
“We are outside the club too but we can’t find either you or Lady Hana.”
I slap my forehead and Hana widens her eyes and covers her mouth to hide her laugh “I mean I am on the other side. I will be there in a minute.”
“Do you know where Hana is?” Liam has a concern in his voice.
“She is with me.” I blurt out.
I hear Liam clearing his throat. “Oh, okay. We will wait.”
I hang up and find Hana staring at me with a smile playing on her lips. I roll my eyes and say, “Oh please! Stop looking at me like that.”
“Like what?” she chuckles.
I avoid her gaze. “Let’s go. They are waiting for us.”
We walk to the parking to find the rest of the gang. I can feel their prying eyes and I rub the back of my neck nervously.
Max lets out a snort and Liam starts laughing. Riley grabs Liam’s arm and doubles up.
“What is it?” I look at each one of them totally confused only to find that Hana has also joined them, laughing.
Riley steps ahead and pinches my cheeks. “Marshmallow!”
“Who?” I am still looking at them puzzled.
“Look at your face Walker, red as a beetroot!”
I cover my face with my hands. “We need to head back kids.” Bastein’s serious tone stops all the chortling. A quick bye-bye, and they all bee line to the SUV. I quietly step towards the truck, my eyes fixed down as I try to ignore Bastein's knowing looks.
I get into the truck and let out a sigh of relief. I hide my face in my hands thinking of what just happened. I gleefully turn my keys but my action is cut short by a phone call.
A phone call that I was not expecting or maybe I was expecting but I forgot about it. I find my fingers shaking a bit as I receive the call.
“Hello?” says the sharp voice.
“Livy?”
“Happy birthday…”
Tumblr media
65 notes · View notes
Text
The Aftermath - Ch. 23
Reliable
Tumblr media
Summary: Jessica and Drake have brunch together before the Derby, and Liam doesn’t like his brother being around the children
Word Count: ~2.8k
Warnings: slight mention of character death 
*All characters belong to Pixelberry, except those that are unique to my story (I’ve also used some characters and fictional instances from Donna Tartt’s book “The Goldfinch”)*
Catch up here! 
Tags: @captain-kingliamsqueen @marshmallowsaremyfavorite @gkittylove99 @lovablegranny @iam-the-kind-and-thoughtful @mom2000aggie @kingliam2019 @queenrileyrose @shanzay44 @cordonianroyalty @hopefulmoonobject @hopelessromanticmonie @cinnamonspongecake @queenjilian @kuladekiwi @twinkle-320 @iaminlovewithtrr @charlotteg234 @amandablink @texaskitten30 @tinkie1973 @louiseingram1208 @queencatherynerhys @pens-girl-87 @missevabean @ladyangel70 @sanchita012 @cordonianprincess @liamandneca @cordonia-gothqueen @pink-diamond13​
I’m not sure if the tags are working or not, but I hope I got everyone down! If you would like to be added/removed, please let me know :)
✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧
- Drake- 
“Oh, Drake!” said Jessica a few hours before the Derby. She took the ring out of the box. Holding it towards the light, she takes a moment to admire it. “It’s beautiful! It’s just...” her forehead wrinkles. 
“What is it?” When she had gone to make a telephone call, Drake took the ring box out of his pocket and put it on the table cloth. They were at a restaurant eating brunch, and even though it wasn’t yet noon the place was chattering and beginning to crowd. 
“Well, it’s just... I wonder.” She examines the ring as if she was trying to make a decision. “I mean, it’s gorgeous! Thank you! But... will it be quite right?”
Drake’s mouth went dry. “Well, it’s up to you, I guess,” he says, reaching for some lemon water she had ordered them and taking a large drink to conceal his surprise and annoyance.
“Because... diamonds.” She puts the ring on her finger and holds it out in different angles. “I adore them! But—” she holds it up again to sparkle in the overhead lights “—diamonds aren’t really my stone. I think they’re just a bit rough, you know? And with my style, it would seem utterly out of contrast!” 
Drake forces himself to smile, trying to seem like he understood her reasoning. Was I supposed to consider her sense of style when deciding whether or not to give her the ring? “It’s whatever you think.”
“Oh, now you’re annoyed.” 
“No, I’m not.” 
“Yes, you are! I’ve hurt your feelings!” Jessica gives a pout.
“I’m just tired, Jess.”
And he was. Yesterday evening had been hectic. He had spent a lot of time wondering about his relationship with Jessica, since they were technically engaged, until Drake finally came to the decision that she didn’t deserve his indecisiveness. Clearly she wanted to marry him because she cared about him, right? Even if Drake cared for someone else more than her, he knew his real choice was either Jessica or no one. And Jessica didn’t deserve to be left for nothing, so Drake decided to go all in.  
He stayed on the sidelines during the Masquerade Ball as usual, but when he saw Leo and his family, he decided to greet him. 
It was a shock to see Leo, but Drake understood that he probably just wanted to support Liam. After he asked Leo casually what he was doing there — even though Drake believed he already knew the answer — to his surprise, Leo was going to stay for the Social Season to try to make amends with his brother. For what reason, Drake didn’t know, but when Leo took him to the side away from his wife and kids, he revealed that he played a small part in keeping Riley away.
Drake had wanted to punch Leo right there and then, but he saw Liam from the corner of his eye, walking over with a forced smile trying to cover up his anger and confusion. Drake watched Liam and his brother talk from a distance, and then Olivia had come up to him. 
Drake had thought she was going to spend the day with Hana and Riley, but instead Olivia reveals that she’s actually been looking into the case with the missing art around Europe, and believes it might be connected to the attack at the Met, where Riley’s husband had died. 
Olivia had said nothing else, and walked off to join Hana and Riley, who were talking to a man with dark hair in a dark suit without a mask on. He looked slightly out of place, but noticing the way that Gabriel and Eleanor smiled up at him, Drake figured out that the man was Boris, the children’s Godfather. 
Boris was introducing himself to everyone in the group. Drake started walking over, figuring that it would be nice to get to know more about Riley and the children’s life from before, but Boris quickly glances in Drake’s direction, and says goodbye to everyone. 
After that, Drake talked to Kiara for a while, who began talking about God knows what, and then he decided to end the night right after dinner. 
The next morning, Liam had told Drake that Eleanor had gotten lost in the maze last night because of the Auvernese royal children. Drake cursed himself, angry that he wasn’t able to keep the children safe, and he noticed his feelings reflected on Liam’s face. 
After that, Jessica had called him, and even though Drake wanted to stay put and help Liam, Riley, and the kids, Liam told Drake that he should go. 
So now, while Jessica was looking at the ring — doubtfully it seemed — Drake told himself that he would tell all his friends at the Derby that him and Jessica were engaged. Her words about the ring had unsettled and confused him, but he figured that if she didn’t like it he could just get her a new one.
“Well look,” she speaks up again. “I will wear it. It’s beautiful. And I know it was your grandmother’s.” 
“I just want you to wear what you want.” 
“I’ll tell you what I think.” Playfully, she reaches across the stable and takes Drake’s hand. “I think we should go get ready for the Derby.” 
“Alright,” Drake says, pressing her palm into his face, trying to remember how lucky he was. 
- Gabriel - 
Most of our morning was spent trying to calm down Ella and convincing her that she could make it through the events today. We had to keep reminding her that she wasn’t alone, and that we wouldn’t let the Princess of Auvernal come near her again. 
But then she got upset again when I had to leave for the horse race with Liam, and she had to go with Mom. Our mother told her that we would reunite after everyone got there, and me and Liam went into the car to get to the Derby.
“Besides the incident with your sister yesterday,” my father says when we’re in the car, “did you enjoy the party?” 
“Yeah.” I nod my head, thinking back to the night before. “Everyone was really nice and the party was fun, even though I didn’t get to dance or anything.”
Liam smiles at me. “I’m glad. As prince, you’ll have to go through a lot of events like that. It’s good that you aren’t uncomfortable, but if you ever are, let me know, alright?”
I nod, thankful that my father was willing to help me. 
As soon as we got out of the car, photographers lunged at us. Through the bright flashes, I saw some reporters trying to push forward and scream questions. Liam quickly put a hand on my shoulder, and with the help of the guards, he led us away from the crowd.  
We reached a tent that was a little farther from the main seats, and was closer to the edge of the race track. Liam holds the curtain for me, and I move in. 
While he goes to take a seat, I stay near the curtain, occasionally peaking my head out to see if Ella and everyone else were here yet. 
“Come on,” Liam says, now standing next to me. “We can go wait for them over there.” 
We stand near a long path that goes towards the stadium seats, where people can’t really see us. I keep my eyes peeled for anyone I might recognize, and Ella finally rushes up to me. 
“Hi, Gabe!” my sister cries, rushing to my side. She’s followed by Mom, who talks to Duchess Savannah, Countess Hana, and Uncle Boris. Behind them are Duke Bertrand and Bartie, then Aunt Rowan and Lord Maxwell, and then Drake — wearing a formal suit! — with a woman I don’t know. 
Everyone moves towards the side and away from the alley so they wouldn’t block anyone. 
“Liam,” Mom grabs his attention. “I want you to meet Boris, Gabe and Ella’s Godfather.” 
“Pleasure,” Uncle Boris says, holding out his hand. I almost flinch. Since Uncle Boris didn’t have a title, isn’t he supposed to just bow? 
Liam firmly grips Uncle Boris’ hand and gives it a shake. “Likewise,” Liam responds. He then turns to Drake and the woman and says, “Lady Jessica, it’s nice to see you again. It was unfortunate that you were unable to attend the Ball yesterday.”
Lady Jessica smiles and bows. “Yes, Your Majesty, I had something to attend to. But do not fret, I promise Drake and I will be making more of an appearance together.” She turns to give Drake a smile, and it makes me want to smile. 
Drake clears his throat. “Uh, yeah. Now that we’re engaged—”
“What?!” Duchess Savannah cries.
“Drake, how long have kept this from me— uh, us?” Lord Maxwell cries. 
“Oh, it’s barely been a week,” Lady Jessica comments. 
“Well, congratulations, you two!” Aunt Rowan says. Everyone repeats the wish, giving Drake a pat on the shoulder and kind smiles to Jessica. 
Someone says that we should go find our seats. Everyone begins to leave, until it’s just Mom, Liam, Ella, and I, with Drake a few feet away, lingering behind the group. 
“I wanted to ask.” Liam clears his throat. “If you and the children would want to watch the show with me?” 
I see Mom glance at Ella and I, and then glance behind her, where people were walking towards their seats. Some of those people look back at Mom, and she quickly looks back at Liam. 
“I told you last night that I already overheard some rumors going around,” Mom says to Liam. “I don’t want there to be more, so I think it’d be better if we went and sat with everyone else.” 
“But! But!” Ella cries. She was already tense and irritated from this morning, and our mother’s words just made it a bit worse.
Mom tilts her head at Ella, which was her silent way of telling us not to argue with her. 
Ella crosses her arms and turns away from Mom. She then looks up at Liam, reaches her arms up at him, and says, “Daddyo! Take me with youuuu!” 
“I see no reason why she can’t,” Liam says, a smirk on his face. I want to laugh, because Ella’s dad would never go against anything Mom said. Ella and I watched Mom and Liam slip into a staring contest, Liam’s smile never falling, and it was funnier than it should have been. 
Mom points at Liam, wiggling her finger. “Don’t get into trouble.” She ruffles my hair and kisses Ella on the forehead, and then walks away. 
I lead us back to the tent. When I go in, I see someone sitting on the chair that Liam was in a couple minutes ago. He turns, and I notice that it’s the same man from yesterday; the one who called himself Uncle Leo. 
“No,” Liam says, moving in front of us. “Leo, get out.” 
“Calm down, brother.” 
Liam had a brother? So “Uncle Leo” wasn’t lying when he said that Hunter and Heather were our cousins. 
“Absolutely not,” Liam continues in a low voice. “I told you yesterday that you aren’t welcome here. The only reason I haven’t kicked you out yet is for the sake of appearances.” 
Liam’s brother nods at him. “And I’m grateful for that, Liam, and I told you, I’m only here to make amends.”
“Did the race start yet?” Ella interrupts their little disagreement. She’s near the railing now, looking out onto the tracks.
“No, angel,” Liam turns to her. “They’re just lining up the horses.”
Liam’s brother raises an eyebrow at him, and Liam’s jaw clenches. 
I hear the curtain move aside with a small gust of air, and Drake emerges. “Hey there,” he says. “Everything okay?” 
“Yes.” Liam turns and pats his brother’s shoulder. “Leo was just on his way out.” 
“I figured I’d see you somewhere,” Drake comments. He moves forward to give Uncle Leo a friendly pat. “I saw Katie talking to Savannah and Riley.” He turns towards Ella and I. “Hunter and Heather were looking for you both.” 
“Oh,” Ella exclaims, looking back at me. I knew she really wanted to make friends, and I was about to suggest that we go back to where Mom was, but then a shot rings out and I hear the thunder of horses running. 
I notice Liam glare at his brother before joining everyone at the railing. 
“The gray one is going fast!” Ella notices. 
“That one is named Macbeth,” Liam tells us. “He usually does very well in the beginning, but— see! Right there, he’s beginning to fault.” 
“The black one’s moving forward!” I cry. 
“That’s Sherluck,” Liam says. “But do you see that brown one? She’s Estella.”
“Wasn’t she supposed to be retired?” Drake questions. “There’s no way she can win.” 
“I don’t know, Drake.” Liam stands up straight. “The odds are in her favor.” 
“But she doesn’t have luck on her side, does she?” 
“Sherluck does!” Ella mentions.
“You don’t need luck to win,” Uncle Leo mentions.
Liam looks at his brother distastefully. 
I turn back towards the horses, seeing Estella taking the lead. 
“C’mon, Sherluck!” Drake cries. 
“You might as well give up now, Drake,” Liam suggests. “Estella’s in the lead.”
“Yeah!” Ella cries.
“Shouldn’t put that much hope on an old horse, Your Majesty,” Drake throws back at Liam. 
As Estella passes the finish line, Liam comments, “At least she’s reliable.”
Drake moves back from the railing and starts taking off his suit. “Yeah, yeah, no need to rub it in.” 
While Drake is turned away, Liam whispers, “Ella, come here.”
“Okay,” she loudly whispers back. Liam picks her up and makes her stand on a chair. He turns away from her and silently tells her to get on his back. Through giggles, Ella wraps her arms around Liam’s neck. He walks away from the chair, and she manages to hold on. 
“C’mon, Liam,” Drake says. He’s in an upward plank position with his shirt off. “We don’t have all day. We have to get to the picnic.” 
“Hold your horses, Walker!” Uncle Leo comments.
“I apologize, Drake,” Liam says, moving towards him with Ella still on his back. “Also, I think I’ve gained some weight recently.” 
He sits down on Drake’s back, and I hear Drake grunt. 
Drake begins doing push-ups while Ella and Liam giggle. 
“Nine... ten,” Drake finishes, barely breathing. Liam gets up from his back, and Drake falls onto the floor. Uncle Leo helps him back up, and Drake starts putting on his clothes again, huffing and puffing. Turning towards Liam, he comments, “Putting on extra weight at the last minute, huh?” Drake shakes his head and finishes buttoning his suit. “Someone needs to humble you out.” 
“I know you’d never miss such an opportunity, old friend,” Liam states, helping Ella off of his back. 
“Yeah, yeah, let’s get outta here. I have to go find Jess. She said she had a call to take and then just walked away.” Drake leads the way out of the tent. Ella and I follow, looking back at Liam, who was standing in front of Uncle Leo.
“Leave if you know what’s good for you,” Liam growls. Ella and I stand outside the tent, but I can hear what they’re saying. 
“Seriously, Liam?” the brother responds. “You think I’d do anything to two innocent kids? Calm the Hell down. We hadn’t seen each other in months before the argument, and I know it was pretty bad, but Regina’s no longer here to ruin anything. We’re the only family the both of us have left. Instead of spoiling it because of my misunderstanding some eleven years ago, can we just be civil? At least in front of Katie, Riley, and the kids.” 
Liam doesn’t talk for so long that I wonder if he’s still in there. After a while he speaks up, “Fine. But if you or your children do anything to my children, understand that I will make sure you never step foot in this country again.” 
“Alright alright, little brother, c’mon,” Uncle Leo says. I hear his voice get louder, and I pull Ella away from the tent so they wouldn’t know I was listening in. “Let’s get to this picnic and not hold everyone up.” 
They emerge, and Uncle Leo’s arm is around Liam, who shrugs it off. Liam puts a hand on each of our shoulders and guides us to the line of cars. We see Mom and Countess Hana about to get in a limo. Mom waves at us and gets in the car. She closes the door, and Ella gives a silent, “Yay, we can go with you!” as Liam guides us to his car. I tumble in after Ella, excited to spend more time with Dad.
48 notes · View notes
11toe11-blog · 4 years
Text
Time
I enter quietly for illumination and insight, on the trail of some thought to take me past it, to the realms of truth, pure are clear.
____
Time, so relative,
made absolute by the clock.
A veil over eternity,
made into a wall.
____
Who is this person talking about movie and wanting to watch something and keep occupied? Who is this person who cant do much? Who wants a moment to be over and done with as soon as possible so that the next moment can emerge which promises to be better that what is?
Who is this person thinking of excuses? Who is this person who rather talk than act?
Who is the person who thinks the phone to be evil, is blaming the phone and all that is in the phone?
Who is this person whose gaze is constantly shifting?
Who is this person who is slinking?
Who is this person, roaring one moment and the next moment shivering?
Who is this person who feels she is a fraud?
Who is this person who has nothing to share?
Who is this person trying to fill up silences with incessant words and questions “whatsup?”
Who is this person checking and rechecking for messages?
Who is this person comparing?
Who is this person who is thinking o fwhat is the best response to the moment?
Who is this person who knows fruits but orders pizza?
Who is this person who cant listen?
Who is this person who cant turn off her phone and wait for it to break?
Who is this person who needs the clock to know the time?
Who is this person who is checking if her sentences emit nothing but “pure intentions”?
Who is this person, the prisoner and the prison guard?
Who is this person who cant listen to her heart?
Who is this person who can understand her heart?
Who is this person who cant know from the heart?
Who ever she is. I look at her. I bless her. She will soon know.
__
Biological Speed
My dear westernized mind, this interview comes to remind you…
¬Excerpts from the second of the Six Interviews of Itsuo Tsuda « Breathing living philosophy » by André Libioulle broadcast published on France Culture in the 1980s.¬
“Q: Europeans elsewhere, you write, need to understand before acting. They do not engage immediately in action.
I.t.: What I am doing here, it is not precisely the same as what we would do in Japan. Often in Japan we do not explain, we found ourselves immediately into the experience path, it’s up to everyone to learn the lesson, isn’t it. Well, in the West this does not work. We need to understand first. But understanding is not enough. I have explained those people who were listening the explanation about swimming, but this does not allow people to be able to dive into the water. If we have not felt the first touch of the water, one can fill his head with all sorts of explanations, but it is useless.”
Q: But people will perhaps argue about this, « but why do I need to be able to feel? Why is that so important for me? «
I.t.: Well, this is the concept of « Seitai » precisely that one that Noguchi created after the war. At the moment people think in a dualistic way: « here – that is good, that is bad. We must fight the evil. When we have fought the evil, we will have the good.  » But in fact, we do not search this: we nomalize the terrain. That’s what he called « Seitai »: a well harmonized body. In the West we keep on finding the cause, we try to exterminate the cause. But as soon as we finished with the cause, here there are other causes that arise. But that’s the method that complies with this mental structure. But Noguchi brought this view which is quite different, which transcends all. If your organism is normalized, the problem itself becomes less important. In the West we say: there is such a problem. That’s a way of defining it, it does not change volume, it’s still there. We must attack this way etc.
Q. So there is in fact for the West an anatomical way of understanding, discursive kind, in which we distinguish cause and effect and in order to be able to act on a particular item. The concept introduced by the Seitai is a different concept. It is the notion of sensation. But this is the notion, if I understand, in which knowledge is not excluded. But it is another type of knowledge, intuitive knowledge, qualitative I would say, in relation to the Western notion of measure or quantification.
I.t.: The same problem increases or decreases importance depending on sensation. A bottle is half empty or half full. But the quantity is exactly the same. But the sensation is different in both cases. So just a little nothing can change human behavior. If one says, « that’s it, I’m done, » from that moment on one can no longer move forward. While if I say « I have already made three steps forward, » then Iam ready to make a fourth step, isn’t it.
Q. You talked about Master Noguchi repeatedly. Could we try to understand what the whole is, the unit in an individual through some examples of the practice of Master Noguchi, Noguchi was a therapist, wasn’t he. He is the creator of the Seitai method. So how is his job? What enabled him to understand those concrete things, spontaneously?
I.t.: For example, each one has its own biological speed, which determines the behavior, actions, movements etc. It is viewed in a quite detached way, objective, as per minute etc., etc., but for Noguchi, well that’s something concrete. Everything comes from that biological speed that is inherent in the individual. Without this notion of speed he can do nothing. But this…
Q: … as we know it, it’s something else …
I.t.: No. We need to create the contact with the biological speed of that particular person. No need to apply a general and objective speed. Well, for example, there is a kid who comes while crying, he is crying because he broke his arm. Parents say: « It is impossible to touch him, he keeps on crying and crying … ». But Noguchi has already touched him. « Ah, ah good then it is because he does not dare to cry in front of a master. » No it’s not that. He touched him at a , biological speed, the breathing speed of the child, which is peculiar to him. At that time, the kid does not feel the contact, it’s part of him, and that it’s so important.
http://www.ecole-itsuo-tsuda.org/en/2-la-respiration-philosophie-vivante/
(Noguchi was one of the teachers of Bonnie Bainbridge Cohen, withwhom i have no started learning, unlearning)
____
And Wikipedia also reminds youOf the process of spiritual knowledge[edit]
Yoga Vasistha teachings are divided into six parts: dispassion, qualifications of the seeker, creation, existence, dissolution and liberation. It sums up the spiritual process in the seven Bhoomikas:[citation needed]
Śubhecchā (longing for the Truth): The yogi (or sādhaka) rightly distinguishes between permanent and impermanent; cultivates dislike for worldly pleasures; acquires mastery over his physical and mental faculties; and feels a deep yearning to be free from Saṃsāra.
Vicāraṇa (right inquiry): The yogi has pondered over what he or she has read and heard, and has realized it in his or her life.
Tanumānasa (attenuation – or thinning out – of mental activities): The mind abandons the many, and remains fixed on the One.
Sattvāpatti (attainment of sattva, "reality"): The Yogi, at this stage, is called Brahmavid ("knower of Brahman"). In the previous four stages, the yogi is subject to sañcita, Prārabdha and Āgamī forms of karma. He or she has been practicing Samprajñāta Samādhi (contemplation), in which the consciousness of duality still exists.
Asaṃsakti (unaffected by anything): The yogi (now called Brahmavidvara) performs his or her necessary duties, without a sense of involvement.
Padārtha abhāvana (sees Brahman everywhere): External things do not appear to exist to the yogi (now called Brahmavidvarīyas); in essence there is a non-cognition of 'objects' as the separation between subject and a distinct object is dissolved; and tasks get performed without any sense of agency (doership). Sañcita and Āgamī karma are now destroyed; only a small amount of Prārabdha karma remains.
Turīya (perpetual samādhi): The yogi is known as Brahmavidvariṣṭha and does not perform activities, either by his will or the promptings of others.
In the spiral, I recognize, I am once again in Śubhecchā and starting on Vicharana.
Some voice tells me i have reentered as my father. It doesnt matter. The story doesnt matter. There are so many. Too confusing.
The sensation. I am learning to let the story be and look at movements and sensations.
2 notes · View notes
portable-wing-wang · 4 years
Text
Gender, Sexuality & Me
Right, here goes.
I've never properly talked about my gender or sexuality on here and feel as if I need to clear things up for friends, family and even myself.
Of course I'm very gender positive, I think everyone should explore themselves thoroughly in order to better understand their place in this world. What I experience will be different from other people and I may even disagree with others who share my experience as everyone is different. Just good to clear the air before we continue.
My name is Will(iam) Kirton. I was born at 1:04 AM on the 10th of April 2000. I was born with male attributes and was such designated a "boy". I have little problem with this. A baby knows itself very little and cannot comprehend itself properly and so adults assign labels which, for the most part, do help with development as a child is introduced to social spaces (schools etc.).
When young, gender means little and so I thought little of it. I never felt apart or different from my schoolmates. I did however feel uncomfortable and didn't know why. Constantly feeling as if I wasn't explaining myself properly and getting confused easily. I was bullied for this by many of the other boys and when trying to defend myself, I was made an outcast. This led to me to very female dominated spaces.
I tried my hardest to join the other boys (as I thought I was supposed to) but time and time again, I'd be pushed away. I did, however, make good friends with a few boys a couple of which I'm still friends with today. But my fondest memories come from my friendships with the girls and how they shaped me as a person.
I didn't know it then but through them I began to question myself, sub-conciously at first but very soon after it started to dominate my thinking. By the age of 14 I knew something was off for sure, but I didn't know what, so I started researching to find an answer.
First, I started to look at trans-folk and see how they saw it."Trans," Such an illusive word. To me it seemed so simple to begin with. Someone wanted to be something else because they felt uncomfortable. I felt uncomfortable. "Maybe there's something in this?" I thought, so I kept digging here and there with little motivation until I was about 15 when GCSEs took over and I didn't have time to think about it much until the summer of 2016. The thoughts came back in a big way. Why? I started going to parties.
Now it may seem a little silly but getting drunk and forgetting to hide myself allowed me to express myself in ways I'd never had the chance to before. Mannerisms began to appear that I wasn't controlling intentionally. I started speaking differently, stopped feeling like I had to explain myself and started having fun. This was the next big step of my self-discovery.
I then started playing DnD. Now, laugh if you wish but I had a human bard character names Steve who I categorized as a projection of myself if a little exaggerated. While playing as Steve, those mannerisms I gained started to take over even when sober. This was the last proof I needed to know I was queer but I didn't know what labels to use. I settled with saying I just had "queer tendencies" and left it at that but I still felt uncomfortable when I wasn't playing Steve.
So, I'm definitely queer, that's for sure but what kind?
I'm researching properly now. And not just gender, but sexuality as well. Bi, pan, gay, ace, etc.. I looked up everything and kept finding new labels. To help ease my brain, I focused on sexuality first. I knew I liked girls but I also liked boys however both in different ways. I timidly said I was bi for a couple years and then came out properly soon after my 18th birthday. I felt comfortable. For now . . .
I was still, however, confused. I couldn't work out whether I was a boy or a girl and it kept making everything else seem so confusing. At this point (16 or so) most of my good friends were male, I was decent at sports and I had a big ol' bass voice. BOY, right?
But there was something still bugging me.
I couldn't figure it out. Not until the summer before Uni, something slipped into place. I had completed my A Levels, I was out as bi, my shitty friends had left me, all was good. Wrong. I was more tense than ever. All I could think about was gender. Gender this, gender that. Constantly thinking, even with the distraction of the Edinburgh Fringe. I was also listening to a lot of Steam Powered Giraffe who, of course, have a trans woman playing the "Rabbit" character. I was obsessed. I wanted to find out everything about her and luckily, she posted a whole set of videos cataloguing her transition and thoughts all the way through. Finally, someone was essentially saying to me clearly what "trans" actually meant. Things began to make sense. I knew then that I was probably not cis but i didn't really feel comfortable saying I was "fully" trans, if you get my meaning.
But then I went to Uni. I finally had a chance to express myself freely and boy oh boy, did I do just that. I became so much more feminine than I ever had been in my life. It was so freeing. But I still didn't feel trans.
Then, someone introduced me to the concept of being "non-binary". A new term. I hadn't heard of it before. Is it like being trans? Or something completely different. I dived in head-first and came out the other end with even more answers but so many more questions.
Finally, I took the plunge (I'm sorry for so many swimming metaphors).
One evening in February 2019 after Uni I was in the loo before a musicals rehearsal. I hadn't felt well all day and was wearing something particularly feminine and caught myself in the mirror. I studied myself for a good few minutes. Each detail, each curve, how my body felt and looked in the clothes I was wearing. I stood there staring. Luckily no one walked in on me.
And something just clicked. After so many years of worrying and tensing, I finally understood. I was genderqueer.
Now, I should explain (here I go again), I didn't just decide then and there. I few months prior, my new uni friend "tom" (she goes by a different name now) had introduced me to a youtuber called Contrapoints. Before anyone says anything, I know she's caused a lot of discourse but I don't feel as if this is the right time to make any cases. Anyway, she didn't used to be openly trans and used to go by the label genderqueer. At the time, she made a very comprehensive video explaining what is and what it meant for her.
It intrigued me so, naturally, I did some more research and found that it fit my situation quite adequately but I didn't feel comfortable falling myself "genderqueer" yet either.
For those who don't know, genderqueer is an umbrella term for a wide range of traits which are either predominantly female, male or androgynous. It doesn't necessarily have a perfect definition and can be different for anybody who identify themselves as such.
My own genderqueerness could be described as a complete rejection of the male binary and so I carry more female and androgynous traits. This affects the way I speak, move my body, dress and my perspective on greater society. I also experience gender dysphoria. Now, to some, this would mean I was most likely just trans and using this a stopping-point before going further. This I feel is not the case. Whilst I am made uncomfortable by my flat chest, copious hair and broad shoulders, I do not feel the same about my genitalia or Adam's apple.
There are also more political connotations with the term genderqueer over non-binary. Genderqueer is a lot more aggressive but it gets the point across more clearly but I wouldn't say I wasn't non-binary. In fact, I think they're one and the same in practice but I do use my identity as a statement and so the genderqueer label feels more appropriate.
So yeah, I came out as genderqueer that February evening. First to my partner, then my friends and only now, almost a year later, am I attempting with my family.
I am so much happier for it too. I kept myself hidden for so long and have only now started to just accept myself and give in to the voice in my head telling me to let go. I'm much more relaxed too. Since coming out and using more neutral and even feminine pronouns, my dysphoria has become less of an issue. I still get it and I have bad days of course but for the first time in a long time, things are looking up.
I can't change the world, but I've been able to find myself in it more clearly and that helps a bunch.
TL;DR: I'm genderqueer. I'm bisexual. I've been out for a considerable time now and feeling better because of it.
Anyway, if you did read the whole thing, thank you. I'm not saying this'll be the same forever but this is me now and I'm still breathing so come get me world!
Feel free to reblog this, I hope it helps others realise themselves too.
16 notes · View notes
Text
I Don’t Want to Go to Sleep
Characters: Dean Winchester x Reader, Sam Winchester
Word Count: 1,254
Warnings: angst, fluff, scared to go to sleep because of nightmares
Summary: Whenever you close your eyes, you get bd nightmares so you stay up to prevent them from infiltrating your mind. Dean makes it his mission to help you.
Squared Filled: Somniphobia // Watching Sunset // Cabin in the Woods
Author’s Note: This is for @spndarkbingo and @spnfluffbingo2019 and @spndeanbingo  respectively. This is unbeta’d and any and all mistakes are all on me.
Feedback the glue that holds my writing together
Tags at the bottom
Tumblr media
The sunset is probably one of the most beautiful things you have ever laid your eyes on. No two sunsets were alike, and you loved seeing the different kinds of colors the sky could come up with at a moment’s notice. The sunset you were looking at was painted bright orange and dark pink. The clouds created the illusion that the sun was a lot higher than it appeared to be. The best part about it was that the sunset was beautiful through the thick trees of the cabin you and the brothers were staying in while you solved the hunt.
There had been a string of wendigo sightings in the woods, and a hunter who was good friends with the brothers offered to let you use the cabin in the woods as shelter while you hunted the wendigo. It was stashed with all kinds of food, warm blankets, enough firewood to last an entire winter, and even a great shower head to get the dirt and grime you knew would be covered your body once you found the monster’s home. The best part about it was that it was smack in the middle of the woods. It was like camping but luxury style. The mornings were peaceful, the trees were still, and if you were quiet enough, you could see deer come up to the house in search of food. You knew they came early because you were always up when they decided to visit.
Well, more likely, you never went to bed.
The thing is when you went to sleep, that’s when the nightmares came to play. It didn’t matter if you had a great day that was spent watching Netflix and shopping for food supplies for the Bunker, would still have gripping nightmares that left you screaming for Dean. He was always the one who was there to call you down after a nightmare. Each nightmare was different, yet they were all the same. Different monster, different person that died because you couldn’t save them, different setting. All of which ended up with the creature killing you at the last second. After each nightmare, you would end up in a pool of your own sweat. It’s why you hated falling asleep—feared it. It was the one part of your life that you couldn’t control. It didn’t bode well for the fact that you needed your energy to hunt, but you just couldn’t let yourself fall asleep.
“Can’t sleep?” Dean asked as he walked onto the back porch.
“I will in a bit,” you lied. He thought you were over your string of nightmares, but you just never told him you were keeping yourself up.
“Yeah, that cup of coffee might not help,” he chuckled as he took a seat next to you on the porch swing. You two stared at the sunset in silence for ten minutes before he spoke again.
“I like those colors. The trees make it look nice.”
“It does, doesn’t it?” you spoke softly as you sipped your coffee.
“You’re not going to sleep, are you?”
“No.”
“You can’t not sleep. Trust me. If we’re going to be hunting this thing, you need to be on alert.”
“If I could, Dean, I would. I’ll get some sleep, okay? I'll wait until the sun goes down.”
“It is a beautiful sunset. I’ll wait with you,” he suggested as he wrapped an arm around the back of the swing, letting his fingers ghost your shoulders. You would give anything to lean into his touch, but then that would be crossing a line you didn’t know was there much less who put it there. If it was up to you, you would have made a move on Dean a long time ago, but why would he want someone with nightmares every night?
Tumblr media
Sunsets have always been something that was good at keeping you up. They were peaceful to look at, they lasted a long time, and they never seemed to judge you for staying up late. Whenever you and the brothers went out on a hunt, you always made time to watch the sun go down because it could calm you in ways that nothing else could. The only thing that beat that was Dean, but he wasn’t always around. However, when you were at the bunker, you didn’t get the pleasure of looking at the sunset. The bunker was so deep into the woods that the sun was barely visible to you which is why you had to search for other methods to try and keep you awake.
Ever since the hunt was done, you had slugged around the Bunker. Since that first night watching the sunset with Dean, you hadn’t gotten any sleep. You were tired, your body begged you to bring it relief, but your mind was screaming at you as it reminded you of what you’ll see if you go to sleep. Coffee usually helped, but when your body couldn’t take any more caffeine, you decided to work out. As the adrenaline rushes through your veins, you were able to sit down and watch some Netflix which usually did the trick.
This time it did not.
Your whole body was on the verge of shutting down, and you decided the best thing you needed was to roam the Bunker to try and give your mind something to do. If you went to your room, you would be tempted to lie down, and if you did that, you would go to sleep which couldn’t happen. Your fear caused a lot of abnormalities within your body, but those were better than the nightmares you would get.
“Y/N, you have to go to sleep,” Dean spoke up after deciding he couldn’t take this anymore. It killed him to see you so tired, but you kept refusing to go to sleep.
“No, I can’t,” you whimpered as you kept walking. Dean kept up your pace which wasn’t that fast and tried to convince you to sleep.
“Look at you. Your body is going to shut down. You need to go to sleep.”
“I can’t! Dean, you don’t see what I see. All those monsters and people I couldn’t save. They’ll kill me if I sleep. They’ll hurt me in every way possible. I can’t go to sleep,” you cried, collapsing in his arms. He held you as you cried which only made you more tired.
“I’m right here. Nothing is going to hurt you. I’ll make sure of it,” he smoothed your hair down.
“They’ll kill me,” you whispered painfully.
“Not with me around. Come on, I’ll lay with you this time,” he said as he picked you up bridal style. Your head lolled into his chest as he walked to your bedroom. It was very easy to get situated in the bed, and he held you close as you cried, begging him not to make you go to sleep.
“I don’t want to go to sleep. I don’t want to… go to sleep. I don’t want to…” you trailed off as your eyes slid closed against your orders. Your mind immediately went into the darkness that made you so fearful. However, this time was only darkness. No monsters. No pain. No people you couldn’t save. Just darkness. Then you realized why. You’ve never slept with Dean, he was always there after the fact. Just his presence alone was enough to ease the pain inside your mind and for once in your life, you slept peacefully.
Tumblr media
Wanna get tagged? Add yourself to this document! If your tag doesn’t work, find out why!
@akshi8278 @winchesterandpie @spn-dean-and-sam-winchester @carribear31@oreosatmidnight @not-naturalfangirl @iam-a-cutiepie @kristendanwayne @milo-winchester-4ever @jensenackesl @irishmaniac316 @helllonearth @juniorhuntersam @pouterpufftrain@ruprecht0420 @carriemichelle2012 @fandomgirl17 @05spn18 @my-wayward-heroes@onlydeanandjensen @expectosel @redsalv20 @dragonrider10 @designcted@xxtheoutsidersxx @live-like-a-girl @unfortunately-a @waywardrose13 @adoptdontshoppets@focusonspn @whizzer1320 @infinite-supernatural-adoring @babypink224221 @witch-of-letters @essie1876 @kdfrqqg @blackcherrywhiskey @gh0stgurl @mogaruke @li-ssu@musiclovinchic93 @kristaparadowski @mizzezm  @thisismysecrethappyplace @the-walking-daryl @sandlee44 @supernatural13-13 @liberty01 @midnightsilver16830@spnmeanwinchester @notmoose45 @posiemax @shortbty14 @cobrakai1967@flamencodiva @paintballkid711 @phantomalchemist @gabrielslittleangel @mel-ithilethiel@jennalyncarrigan1230  @whit85-blog @tricksterdean @gabriels-golden-kazoo@emoryhemsworth @menewyn @strayrosesbloom @princessizzy36 @kiwihoee @jennazeise@amotleyworld @kendall-michele @mrspeacem1nusone @ballistic-bailey @graceless-stuff@calaofnoldor @stylesismyhubs @janicho88 @yoursmilemakesmeloveyou@shamelesslydean @lizbester @kina666 @megsyrae @lmpala97 @deans-baby-momma@lonelycaffeinateddreamer @screechingartisancashbailiff @thefaithfulwriter@myownsnowflake @xxboesefrauxx  @hhiggs @mayaslifeinabox @woodworthti666@algudaodoce03 @burningcoffeetimetravel  @deanmonsandnegansbitch @deansgirl-1968 @miraclesoflove
146 notes · View notes
icharchivist · 4 years
Text
Anyway, that’s it, i’m finally done with all of What Makes the Sky Blue, all 3 stories.
What to say aside from “wow.”
I mean. Man.
Okay so first, here’s the link to my liveblog in chronological order, for wmtsb.
which i’m putting there bc i need to reread it to see my own reactions and dear lord i went ham as soon as Sandalphon appeared like he deserves.
It was such a ride, and it’s been a long time since i last liveblogged something - tbh mostly bc i got into gbf at the same time i decided to take a break from tumblr. 
But i knew i’d cry enough for wmtsb that i’d need to properly expose my thoughts and by g o d indeed. 
it’s hard to say anything now once it’s done bc man, i poured my soul into it.
It was beautiful and sad and tragic. The characters were great and interesting, the plot worked super well, the drama was so high stakes i cannot get over it.
Sandalphon is a wonderful character and i’m so glad to have got to know him this much.
Lucifer makes me soft and sad and now i’ll forever be sad over how much those two loved each other but the world was so harsh on them ;;;
As for the rest of the characters i guess we are forced to do an honorable mention to the snake that is Belial who entertained me a long while g o d.
and I’m delighted to get to know Lucio now and how much it is torturing our poor Sandalphon.
Iam even more in love with my crew now that i was before, as always they are perfect.
It was a fun ride. I loved every minute of it. 
Now i’m back into actually playing the game... And I also need to read the Siegfried event since i found him but let’s take a short break. (if only bc tumblr is stopping me from posting photoset again-
It was fun. Thank you all for bearing with me.
I hope you liked the Sad Angels story. GBF fans are really proud of it and with cause, bless them.
4 notes · View notes
caramelohaechan · 5 years
Text
Bad ass~ Kim Jungwoo Imagine
for @iam-uwu the sweetheart 💖
~
Fandom: NCT, NCT U, NCT 127 
Genre: Fluff, baby
Warning(s): male! reader  // suggestive talk// unedited// this is bad... sorry// um very very................bad// sorry okay bye 
~
Tumblr media
      You watched with intrigue as people scurried around you like busy mice while you stood completely still. You felt if you moved a muscle that you’d disrupt this oddly organized chaos. Which, you should have seen coming. Shooting for music videos was always like this, an entire mess with flurries of people and voices. You always found it a little much, not really your taste, but you could never resist your boyfriend when he asked you to come. 
Jungwoo was just a person no one could resist. You were sure that even the devil himself couldn’t say no to Jungwoo, that’s just how cute and gentle he was. He tended to latch onto ones arm when he was asking for things, making his eyes very wide and glossy and pouting his beautiful lips. There was no way to say no to that. 
So that’s how you found yourself in the situation you were currently disliking; all because of your stupidly cute boyfriend. He didn’t want you to miss him too much, and since it was your own day off from work he invited you to tag along as he and his members filmed their new music video Wakey Wakey. 
It was a whole ass bop and you were so incredibly proud of your boyfriend. Which was why you didn’t mind coming to such a hectic place for him. 
Also, you really liked to watch Jungwoo dance. He always got extremely focused and had a sort of smoky demeanor. Like a bad boy. Which was the complete opposite of what he was. 
Finally the madness around you calmed a bit and you found yourself looking at the boys parting to do their solo closeups. Your hands itched to go and hold Jungwoo, but you knew that you couldn’t risk messing up his makeup or the perfect messiness of his hair. 
Instead you watched him laughing along with Jaehyun at Johnny’s new look for the MV. He caught your eyes exactly when a piece of hair fell across his forehead. You laughed lightly as he crossed his eyes to look at the specific strand. Before he could try and fix it himself he was whisked away to the set for his own closeup. You watched closely as he thanked the person and his parts of the song came on. He mouthed the lyrics and acted perfectly, making you smile broadly. 
It didn’t seem like long, but after about fifteen minutes the manager called for a break and you were finally able to follow the members to their dressing room, the smile never leaving your face. You made a beeline around the members to get to Jungwoo, who was sitting and drinking water. 
“Wow.” You said as you appeared behind him, placing your hands on his shoulders. 
Jungwoo looked at you through the mirror before him and his lips lifted in an adorable grin. He giggled. “Was I good?” 
You raised your eyebrows. “Amazing. Like always. You look good in all black. Almost like a badass.” 
Jungwoo turned in his chair and pouted. “I am badass.” 
You thought about the time that Jungwoo had made you carry him around your apartment because he had thought he had seen a bug in your kitchen (it had only been a fallen piece of seaweed). 
“Yeah, you are.” You said instantly, trying your best to hide your smile. 
Jungwoo’s pout increased before he sighed loudly. “I’m sorry that they’re making you stay back there while we film. I know this isn’t how you planned to spend your day off.” 
“It’s fine. I wanted to be here, I knew what would happen.”
You forgot for a second that you weren’t supposed to mess up any part of Jungwoo’s appearance and kissed him on the lips. Your hands went to cup his face and you let your thumb and forefinger pinch his earlobe. He melted under your touch, tugging you around the chair by the edge of your shirt. His own fingers then hooked into the loops of your jeans and brought your closer to him as he spread his knees to accommodate you between them. 
You pulled away when he opened his lips for more. You knew that it was already problematic that you had kissed him and ruined his lip makeup, if the staff looked over and saw you two making out it probably wouldn’t end well. His lips were sensitive and were already pinker than they should have been the moment you pulled away. Jungwoo leaned forward like he didn’t want to part from you and you sighed softly, using your thumb to try and even out his lipstick again. 
“I messed up your makeup.” You stated, wiggling the earring in his ear. 
He rolled his eyes and wrapped his arms around you. “I don’t care. I just want to kiss you.” 
You laughed and shook your head. “We always kiss. Plus, Haechan looks very uncomfortable over there. Yeah, he just pretended to gag.” 
Jungwoo shrugged his shoulders and placed his chin on your chest, peering up at you with wide glossy eyes. You sighed again, harder this time. He was so beautiful. So soft and cute. A stark difference to what he was moments before when the camera was rolling. 
You patted his head and removed your fingers from his earlobe to run it across the skin of his jaw. “I love you.” 
He blinked and you could see the tips of his ears go red as he said it back. “I love you too. I’m tired. I want to go eat noodles and then cuddle.” 
You stopped adoring him for a second to say something random that crossed your mind. “You know what you remind me of?” 
Jungwoo pulled away slightly and creased his eyebrows. “What?” 
“A toasted marshmallow.” You said, nodding. “You look hard to others, that toasted exterior, but once you sink your teeth into it, your all soft and gooey. You’re such a fucking cutie, Jungwoo.” 
Jungwoo blushed entirely through his makeup and grinned bashfully, shaking his head. He leaned back and let his back hit the chair but didn’t bother unraveling his arms from around you. 
“Y/N,” He said softly. He always spoke softly, but when he was with you his voice got ten times softer. “I love you. But stop! I’m going to make my makeup melt off with all the heat you’re making me create.” 
You leaned forward and kissed the tip of his nose. “You’re right. I should go and talk to the others. Your makeup artist looks like she wants to approach us but is scared of interrupting something.” 
“She would be.” Jungwoo said, pulling you closer. “You said something about teeth sinking into something?” 
You chuckled, raking a hand through you hair. “Maybe, but oh look! Johnny wants to talk to me.” 
You slipped from his grasp and shot over to where the rest of the members were. The makeup artist was too quick for Jungwoo and sprinted before him, immediately grabbing a lip brush to fix what you had ruined. 
~
   Later that night, you sat on your couch watching a random drama playing on the TV while waiting for your boyfriend and delivery to arrive. You were very excited for both. You had ordered Jungwoo’s favorite along with a mango cake for the celebration of Jungwoo’s first World Tour, since you hadn’t had the time to celebrate it earlier. 
The second the doorbell rang you were up and turning the knob without even looking out through the peephole. The delivery man was very suprised by your enthusiasm and handed you your food in a hurry when he noticed you had given him much more than what the bill was. You knew that you had given him far too much money, but you were feeling just right and didn’t mind letting him leave with the change. You left the door open for a second since your hands were full and set everything down on the table, peeping in the bags to check for everything. 
You jumped when you heard the door slam behind you and turned quickly to see that Jungwoo was standing there, still dressed in his all black outfit from set. You raised your eyebrows when you noticed he was breathing heavily. 
“Did you run up the stairs again?” You asked, turning back to the table and taking all the boxes of from out from the paper bags. You left the cake in it’s special bag and decided to unveil it last as a surprise. 
“Y/N,” You heard Jungwoo say. “Look at me.” 
You turned back to your boyfriend and were frightened yet again to see him so close the tip of your shoes touched his. You looked into his eyes and prepared yourself to say something but he grabbed your chin and pulled you closer.
“Jungwoo?” You asked, creasing your eyebrows. His lips were so close to kissing you but they weren’t. “Are you-” 
That’s the moment he decided to kiss you. Just when you were about to ask him if he was okay. Your hands instinctively went to travel to his torso and wrap him so close that he was basically standing on your feet. You found yourself getting lost in his kiss, the unusual way that he gripped you hard. Your mouth opened when he pushed you harshly back into the table, causing a couple of empty bags fall to the floor. 
You pulled back and look to the side to see if the cake was safe. “Jungwoo, the cake!” 
Jungwoo, who had started to attack your neck with kisses when your lips left his, looked at you with furrowed eyebrows. “Cake?” 
You pulled away from him completely and walked around the table to pull the cake out of the bag, which was so close to tipping over the edge. You pulled out the clear packaging, revealing the adorably decorated cake, which had cute mango characters engraved in the sides. 
“Yes, cake. I got it to celebrate your first tour. I was going to surprise you, but then you came in all quiet and rough you almost made it fall off the table.” You placed it in the middle of the table and shook your head as you rubbed your lips with your free hand. “What was that, by the way?” 
“I was trying to be sexy and bad ass, but you said cake and now I just want to eat it.” Jungwoo admitted, looking at it with sparkling eyes. He laughed after a second, his whole face lighting up cutely. “I love mango.” 
“Was it because of what I said earlier?” You asked after a second of adoring his face. “The whole bad ass thing that lasted about two seconds?” 
Jungwoo sat at the table while nodding and grabbing the boxes of food. “Yeah, but it wasn’t because I wanted to prove anything... I just wanted to come here and have very hot sex with you but then you said cake and now i see food... my priorities changed.” 
You laughed, sitting in the chair opposite of him and began to unbox the food as well. “I can see that. I guess this food is the only thing I’m sinking my teeth into tonight. Since you know, your priorities have changed.” 
Jungwoo stopped chewing and looked up at you with wide eyes. He spoke with food stuffed in his cheeks, “Hey hey I didn’t say that! I just want food first before... that.” 
You reached across the table and pinched his puffed out cheeks, grinning widely. “I’m kidding. If that’s what you want, then that’s okay. I’m fine just being here with you, cake or not, hot sex or not.” 
Jungwoo narrowed his eyes at you. “Are you sure you’re not the marshmallow here? You’re awfully soft.” 
“Only for you.” You looked at your boyfriend for a second before standing from your seat and walking over to his side of the table. You pulled him up softly and grabbed his cheeks. He looked confused and slowed his chewing. “I love you.” 
“I know. I love you too, babe.” He said, still looking very confused. 
You made a face. “But you’ll never really know to what extent. I love you so so much.” 
Jungwoo swallowed. Then he burst into tears. “Fuck, Y/N. I love you so much too.” 
You hugged him close, almost laughing at how quickly the two of you could change moods. You rubbed his still perfectly styled hair. “Don’t cry, baby. Seeing you cry makes me want to cry.” 
“I just love you so much and I am so glad that I found someone who loves me too. I know you love me and it just makes me so happy when you tell me.” Jungwoo sniffled into your chest. 
He pulled away and you took the chance to cup your palms around his jaw and pull him in for a kiss. He kissed you back and wrapped his arms around your neck. You smiled and rested your head against his when the kiss was done. 
“We’ve got to get ourselves together.” You said softly. 
“We’re very unstable.” He agreed, laughing his adorable soft laugh that made your heart pound. 
You kissed his lips one last time and nodded. “Let’s finish eating our food and then we can have your cake.” 
“And then can we cuddle on the couch?” Jungwoo asked, not letting you go until you agreed. 
You were glad that Jungwoo wasn’t a bad ass. He was your soft fluffy marshmallow. And you loved him so so much. 
~
lmaoooo someone pls give me tips on how to write I cannot deall
Sorry this took so long to get out bb 😭
Tumblr media
66 notes · View notes
avanneman · 5 years
Text
Carriage House Days
Just off the corner of Connecticut and N Streets in Washington, DC is a reasonably imposing red-brick urban mini-mansion, which, a small plaque informs you, once belonged to General Henry Robert, who, you probably don’t know, wrote Robert’s Rules of Order. But back in 1975 when I worked there as a file clerk, we called it “the Carriage House,” because of the large room in the basement which indeed had once been a carriage house.
Like everyone else in the Carriage House, I worked on the “White & Case Case” for the law firm of Arnold & Porter, started in the late forties by two New Deal alumni, Thurman Arnold and Abe Fortas, who were then joined by another New Dealer, Paul Porter. Fortas was appointed to the Supreme Court by his very good friend Lyndon Johnson, who ultimately but inadvertently all but ruined Fortas’ life by seeking to elevate him to Chief Justice, leading to a number of scandals that both prevented Fortas from getting the job and, later, forced him to resign from the Court altogether, which might not have happened if Fortas hadn’t been Jewish, and would have been the nation’s first Jewish Chief Justice.
This was all ancient history by the time my association with the firm—mute, inglorious, and brief—began. Thurman and Abe’s original idea, it seems, was to found an early version of a “boutique” law firm, handling just a few “interesting” cases. Unsurprisingly, that strategy fell by the wayside as Washington boomed. The firm was originally housed in a number of the row houses on N Street, most spectacularly by an impressive mansion on the corner of N and 19th that had been owned by Teddy Roosevelt when he was Assistant Secretary of the Navy during the McKinley Administration. However, by the time I arrived at the Carriage House, most of the senior staff were housed in the I.A.M Building, a Washington, DC sized “skyscraper” on the corner of N and Connecticut, owned by the International Association of Machinists, whose president, William “Wimpy” Wimpisinger, was regarded by some as the most “dangerous” labor leader in America, though if Wimpy ever did anything dangerous, I never heard about it.
Most of the people in the Carriage House were young women, either paralegals or secretaries, which left me doubly the odd man out, or even trebly so, because I was quite possibly the oldest person there—of the regulars, at least—though a fortunately youthful appearance kept my presence and position there from looking as dubious as in fact it was.
I spent most of my time copying and collating documents. The enormous Xerox machines of the time could only copy a single page at a time—no automatic feeds and, of course, no automatic collating. I once spent three days assembling 50 copies of a 300-page document. Occasionally, I would read through transcripts of depositions and circle the names of "important" people whenever they appeared. One of the attorneys at many of these depositions would introduce himself at the start of each session in the following manner: "My name is Bobby Lawyer and I am an attorney."
I lived on Q Street, just a few blocks away from the Carriage House, in an efficiency I rented for $175 a month, furnished largely from what I scavenged from the street. I slept on a $50 mattress and listened to a $1200 stereo, both spread out on the floor. I sat in a worn wicker chair and ate from a worn card table, kept my books in a worn bookcase and my 100-odd jazz albums in a cardboard box.
The young women in the Carriage House who were single would often go to a bar they called “the Airplane”, located nearby on 19th St., but I was far too shy to do that. I would not have wanted to go to a “pick up” bar of any sort, and most certainly would not have wanted to go to a pick up bar frequented by women I knew at work.
However, there was a jazz club located in the basement of the town house right next to the Carriage House, “Harold’s Rogue and Jar”. I never found out what the name meant. I would go there occasionally and sit at the bar without talking to anyone. I would order a bacon cheeseburger with steak fries and a diet Coke. I can’t remember any of the names who appeared at the club, but it was serious jazz—nothing like the terrible “cool jazz” of today. The house drummer was a woman named Dottie Dodgione, who I think was the club manager as well. She was in her fifties, I would guess, with a stiff bouffant hairdo who wore pant suits, and ended each number with a furious solo. Sometimes, despite the jazz, the stress of being around so many people would get to me, and I would take my meal home, wrapped in heavy aluminum foil, and I would sit in my wicker chair and eat my rich bar food in peace and quiet and solitude.
After eight months at Arnold & Porter, I was fired, something anyone with the slightest percipience could have foreseen. Somewhere in Moby Dick Herman Melville warns sea captains not to hire “Platonists”—those with their eyes fixed only on invisible horizons—and he could have offered the same advice to law firms. But my time at the A&P was far from a complete loss. A month before I was fired, I was feeling so flush that I shopped for furniture, at Woodward & Lothrop, then DC’s largest department store. I chose a $400 sleeper sofa, blue and white plaid, a $150 butcher block table, and two Breuer chairs, which I had first seen in an optometrist’s shop and had thought were very classy. I didn’t have a credit card and didn’t know if Woodie’s would take a check, so I paid with $800 in cash, in the form of 16 fifties I had withdrawn from the bank the previous day. It was an investment that, though it might have seemed ill-timed, was in fact very much the reverse. Shortly after being fired, I started dating a young woman who would change my life significantly, a young woman who, I think, would not have dated a man who slept on a mattress on the floor and ate from a card table and a worn wicker chair.
Afterwords The rear windows of the Carriage House faced on the alley behind N Street. A “celebrity” hair dresser, whose name I never learned, parked one of three classic cars that he drove to work each day in that alley—a funereal-looking green and black pre-war Rolls Royce, a post-war Rolls that was cream with red pinstriping, and, surely the pièce de résistance, a midnight-blue coffin-nosed Cord convertible with a tan roof, its chrome supercharger exhaust pipes gleaming in the sun. I wonder how many people would drive such cars in rush-hour traffic today.
The top floor of the IAM building had both offices for Arnold & Porter and the Machinists’ Union. The A&P had lots of attractive, stylish young women who worked as secretaries and receptionists. One of them who sat at the front desk of the top floor told me how difficult it was to keep a straight face when the Machinists’ big shots came swanking in in their horrible 70s-era polyester leisure suits—mint green with white piping and matching white shoes, or what smirky journalists liked to call a “full Cleveland”, white suit, white shirt, and white shoes.
Shortly after I left the A&P, the Carriage House was commandeered by Carolyn Agger, a senior partner and Abe Fortas’ wife. Carolyn, who had been housed in the IAM building, was afraid of elevators, and wanted an office in a building with a nice staircase.
A year or so after I left, Arnold & Porter deserted N Street entirely, building the “Thurmond Arnold Building” at the corner of New Hampshire and M, but they didn’t stay there long. The firm has now merged with a New York law firm, Kaye Scholer, becoming Arnold & Porter Kaye Scholer LLP, with offices all around the world. The DC office is on Massachusetts Avenue, just southeast of Mt. Vernon Square, a stretch of road that constitutes one of several “lobbyist lanes” radiating from the Capitol.
During the McCarthy years, Arnold, Fortas, & Porter defended many people accused of communism. Fortas in particular was a frequent opponent of Joe McCarthy, but the opposition to his appointment as chief justice seemed to come mostly from southern Democrats, who often saw integration as a Jewish/communist plot. When Jesse Helms (R-NC) was elected to the Senate in 1972, one of his goals was to “get” the Jews. He was a furious opponent of Israel until the Reagan years, when it was finally explained to him that you couldn’t make it to the very top in DC unless you learned to play ball with AIPAC.
The White & Case Case involved another law firm, in New York. One of its senior partners, a Mr. Eply, was facing criminal charges brought by the Securities and Exchange Commission, accusing him of criminal behavior based on the advice he gave to a White & Case client, Cortez Randell, a sixties wheeler and dealer who ended up doing time, though, I’m pretty sure, Eply did not. The SEC’s case against Eply was one of first impression, and naturally White & Case was willing to move heaven and earth to protect both Eply and other attorneys who might find themselves in legal peril merely for trying to turn an honest buck or two.
The story of Cortez Randell and his company, National Student Marketing, had been spectacular enough to be the subject of a book, out in paperback while the White & Case Case was still gaining momentum, called The Funny Money Game, by Andrew Tobias, perhaps not the first and certainly not the last up and coming Harvard graduate to make a name for himself by writing a book about his experiences on Wall Street under the tutelage of Mammon.
The way National Student Marketing “worked”—the reason why Cortez Randell got so rich so quickly and then imploded—was that Randell had either discovered or invented “synergy”. This meant buying out firms that provided goods or services complementary to whatever it was NSM was already selling—“better together”, one might say. But the “real” secret was that NSM didn’t buy other companies with money; it used NSM stock instead, which was better than money, because it increased in value every year.
There are lots of things wrong with this model—NSM was going to run out of “complementary” firms to buy, NSM stock was going up because the economy was expanding and all stocks were going up, not because NSM was so fabulous—but the biggest and simplest reason of all is that any financial instrument that can be better than money can also be worse than money, setting a pattern that has repeated itself a number of times since, on a scale far more spectacular than NSM’s. Someone comes up with a brilliant idea, a better mousetrap, and makes a lot of money, and creates a financial instrument based on that idea—be it a simple share of stock, a mortgage-backed security, a collateralized debt obligation, or whatever—that is “better” than money, and a lot of people get rich on that financial instrument. Eventually, however, the better mousetrap, whatever it is, stops being better, and becomes the new normal. It’s lost its edge. But the people who have gotten rich off their “better than money” gimmick can’t believe that, or won’t believe that. The line that went around among the Wall Street geniuses who almost sank the world’s economy back in 2008 was that you don’t stop playing “Musical Chairs” until the music stops, even if you see the chairs disappearing. However, when the music had stopped, they started singing—and telling lies—until there were no chairs left, leaving the government to pay for all the furniture they’d destroyed.
2 notes · View notes
imperium-romanum · 6 years
Text
Pliny the Younger | Mount Vesuvius Eruption, Part One
C. Plinius Tacito suo s.
Petis ut tibi avunculi mei exitum scribam, quo verius tradere posteris possis. Gratias ago; nam video morti eius si celebretur a te immortalem gloriam esse propositam. Quamvis enim pulcherrimarum clade terrarum, ut populi ut urbes memorabili casu, quasi semper victurus occiderit, quamvis ipse plurima opera et mansura condiderit, multum tamen perpetuitati eius scriptorum tuorum aeternitas addet. Equidem beatos puto, quibus deorum munere datum est aut facere scribenda aut scribere legenda, beatissimos vero quibus utrumque. Horum in numero avunculus meus et suis libris et tuis erit. Quo libentius suscipio, deposco etiam quod iniungis.
Erat Miseni classemque imperio praesens regebat. Nonum Kal. Septembres hora fere septima mater mea indicat ei apparere nubem inusitata et magnitudine et specie. Usus ille sole, mox frigida, gustaverat iacens studebatque; poscit soleas, ascendit locum ex quo maxime miraculum illud conspici poterat. Nubes - incertum procul intuentibus ex quo monte; Vesuvium fuisse postea cognitum est - oriebatur, cuius similitudinem et formam non alia magis arbor quam pinus expresserit. Nam longissimo velut trunco elata in altum quibusdam ramis diffundebatur, credo quia recenti spiritu evecta, dein senescente eo destituta aut etiam pondere suo victa in latitudinem vanescebat, candida interdum, interdum sordida et maculosa prout terram cineremve sustulerat. Magnum propiusque noscendum ut eruditissimo viro visum. Iubet liburnicam aptari; mihi si venire una vellem facit copiam; respondi studere me malle, et forte ipse quod scriberem dederat. Egrediebatur domo; accipit codicillos Rectinae Tasci imminenti periculo exterritae - nam villa eius subiacebat, nec ulla nisi navibus fuga -: ut se tanto discrimini eriperet orabat. Vertit ille consilium et quod studioso animo incohaverat obit maximo. Deducit quadriremes, ascendit ipse non Rectinae modo sed multis - erat enim frequens amoenitas orae - laturus auxilium. Properat illuc unde alii fugiunt, rectumque cursum recta gubernacula in periculum tenet adeo solutus metu, ut omnes illius mali motus omnes figuras ut deprenderat oculis dictaret enotaretque.
Iam navibus cinis incidebat, quo propius accederent, calidior et densior; iam pumices etiam nigrique et ambusti et fracti igne lapides; iam vadum subitum ruinaque montis litora obstantia. Cunctatus paulum an retro flecteret, mox gubernatori ut ita faceret monenti 'Fortes' inquit 'fortuna iuvat: Pomponianum pete.' Stabiis erat diremptus sinu medio - nam sensim circumactis curvatisque litoribus mare infunditur -; ibi quamquam nondum periculo appropinquante, conspicuo tamen et cum cresceret proximo, sarcinas contulerat in naves, certus fugae si contrarius ventus resedisset. Quo tunc avunculus meus secundissimo invectus, complectitur trepidantem consolatur hortatur, utque timorem eius sua securitate leniret, deferri in balineum iubet; lotus accubat cenat, aut hilaris aut - quod aeque magnum - similis hilari. Interim e Vesuvio monte pluribus locis latissimae flammae altaque incendia relucebant, quorum fulgor et claritas tenebris noctis excitabatur. Ille agrestium trepidatione ignes relictos desertasque villas per solitudinem ardere in remedium formidinis dictitabat. Tum se quieti dedit et quievit verissimo quidem somno; nam meatus animae, qui illi propter amplitudinem corporis gravior et sonantior erat, ab iis qui limini obversabantur audiebatur. Sed area ex qua diaeta adibatur ita iam cinere mixtisque pumicibus oppleta surrexerat, ut si longior in cubiculo mora, exitus negaretur. Excitatus procedit, seque Pomponiano ceterisque qui pervigilaverant reddit. In commune consultant, intra tecta subsistant an in aperto vagentur. Nam crebris vastisque tremoribus tecta nutabant, et quasi emota sedibus suis nunc huc nunc illuc abire aut referri videbantur. Sub dio rursus quamquam levium exesorumque pumicum casus metuebatur, quod tamen periculorum collatio elegit; et apud illum quidem ratio rationem, apud alios timorem timor vicit. Cervicalia capitibus imposita linteis constringunt; id munimentum adversus incidentia fuit. Iam dies alibi, illic nox omnibus noctibus nigrior densiorque; quam tamen faces multae variaque lumina solvebant. Placuit egredi in litus, et ex proximo adspicere, ecquid iam mare admitteret; quod adhuc vastum et adversum permanebat. Ibi super abiectum linteum recubans semel atque iterum frigidam aquam poposcit hausitque. Deinde flammae flammarumque praenuntius odor sulpuris alios in fugam vertunt, excitant illum. Innitens servolis duobus assurrexit et statim concidit, ut ego colligo, crassiore caligine spiritu obstructo, clausoque stomacho qui illi natura invalidus et angustus et frequenter aestuans erat. Ubi dies redditus - is ab eo quem novissime viderat tertius -, corpus inventum integrum illaesum opertumque ut fuerat indutus: habitus corporis quiescenti quam defuncto similior.
Interim Miseni ego et mater - sed nihil ad historiam, nec tu aliud quam de exitu eius scire voluisti. Finem ergo faciam. Unum adiciam, omnia me quibus interfueram quaeque statim, cum maxime vera memorantur, audieram, persecutum. Tu potissima excerpes; aliud est enim epistulam aliud historiam, aliud amico aliud omnibus scribere. Vale.
From Pliny to Tacitus.
You ask me to send you an account of my uncle's death, so that you may be able to give posterity an accurate description of it. I am much obliged to you, for I can see that the immortality of his fame is well assured, if you take in hand to write of it. For although he perished in a disaster which devastated some of the fairest regions of the land, and though he is sure of eternal remembrance like the peoples and cities that fell with him in that memorable calamity, though too he had written a large number of works of lasting value, yet the undying fame of which your writings are assured will secure for his a still further lease of life. For my own part, I think that those people are highly favoured by Providence who are capable either of performing deeds worthy of the historian's pen or of writing histories worthy of being read, but that they are peculiarly favoured who can do both. Among the latter I may class my uncle, thanks to his own writings and to yours. So I am all the more ready to fulfil your injunctions, nay, I am even prepared to beg to be allowed to undertake them.
My uncle was stationed at Misenum, where he was in active command of the fleet, with full powers. On the 24th of August, about the seventh hour, my mother drew his attention to the fact that a cloud of unusual size and shape had made its appearance. He had been out in the sun, followed by a cold bath, and after a light meal he was lying down and reading. Yet he called for his sandals, and climbed up to a spot from which he could command a good view of the curious phenomenon. Those who were looking at the cloud from some distance could not make out from which mountain it was rising - it was afterwards discovered to have been Mount Vesuvius - but in likeness and form it more closely resembled a pine-tree than anything else, for what corresponded to the trunk was of great length and height, and then spread out into a number of branches, the reason being, I imagine, that while the vapour was fresh, the cloud was borne upwards, but when the vapour became wasted, it lost its motion, or even became dissipated by its own weight, and spread out laterally. At times it looked white, and at other times dirty and spotted, according to the quantity of earth and cinders that were shot up.
To a man of my uncle's learning, the phenomenon appeared one of great importance, which deserved a closer study. He ordered a Liburnian galley to be got ready, and offered to take me with him, if I desired to accompany him, but I replied that I preferred to go on with my studies, and it so happened that he had assigned me some writing to do. He was just leaving the house when he received a written message from Rectina, the wife of Tascus, who was terrified at the peril threatening her - for her villa lay just beneath the mountain, and there were no means of escape save by shipboard - begging him to save her from her perilous position. So he changed his plans, and carried out with the greatest fortitude the task, which he had started as a scholarly inquiry.
He had the galleys launched and went on board himself, in the hope of succouring, not only Rcctina, but many others, for there were a number of people living along the shore owing to its delightful situation. He hastened, therefore, towards the place whence others were fleeing, and steering a direct course, kept the helm straight for the point of danger, so utterly devoid of fear that every movement of the looming portent and every change in its appearance he described and had noted down by his secretary, as soon as his eyes detected it. Already ashes were beginning to fall upon the ships, hotter and in thicker showers as they approached more nearly, with pumice-stones and black flints, charred and cracked by the heat of the flames, while their way was barred by the sudden shoaling of the sea bottom and the litter of the mountain on the shore. He hesitated for a moment whether to turn back, and then, when the helmsman warned him to do so, he exclaimed, "Fortune favours the bold ; try to reach Pomponianus." The latter was at Stabiae, separated by the whole width of the bay, for the sea there pours in upon a gently rounded and curving shore. Although the danger was not yet close upon him, it was none the less clearly seen, and it travelled quickly as it came nearer, so Pomponianus had got his baggage together on shipboard, and had determined upon flight, and was waiting for the wind which was blowing on shore to fall. My uncle sailed in with the wind fair behind him, and embraced Pomponianus, who was in a state of fright, comforting and cheering him at the same time. Then in order to calm his friend's fears by showing how composed he was himself, he ordered the servants to carry him to the bath, and, after his ablutions, he sat down and had dinner in the best of spirits, or with that assumption of good spirits which is quite as remarkable as the reality.
In the meantime broad sheets of flame, which rose high in the air, were breaking out in a number of places on Mount Vesuvius and lighting up the sky, and the glare and brightness seemed all the more striking owing to the darkness of the night. My uncle, in order to allay the fear of his companions, kept declaring that the country people in their terror had left their fires burning, and that the conflagration they saw arose from the blazing and empty villas. Then he betook himself to rest and enjoyed a very deep sleep, for his breathing, which, owing to his bulk, was rather heavy and loud, was heard by those who were waiting at the door of his chamber. But by this time the courtyard leading to the room he occupied was so full of ashes and pumice-stones mingled together, and covered to such a depth, that if he had delayed any longer in the bedchamber there would have been no means of escape. So my uncle was aroused, and came out and joined Pomponianus and the rest who had been keeping watch. They held a consultation whether they should remain indoors or wander forth in the open; for the buildings were beginning to shake with the repeated and intensely severe shocks of earthquake, and seemed to be rocking to and fro as though they had been torn from their foundations. Outside again there was danger to be apprehended from the pumice-stones, though these were light and nearly burnt through, and thus, after weighing the two perils, the latter course was determined upon. With my uncle it was a choice of reasons which prevailed, with the rest a choice of fears.
They placed pillows on their heads and secured them with cloths, as a precaution against the falling bodies. Elsewhere the day had dawned by this time, but there it was still night, and the darkness was blacker and thicker than any ordinary night. This, however, they relieved as best they could by a number of torches and other kinds of lights. They decided to make their way to the shore, and to see from the nearest point whether the sea would enable them to put out, but it was still running high and contrary. A sheet was spread on the ground, and on this my uncle lay, and twice he called for a draught of cold water, which he drank. Then the flames, and the smell of sulphur which gave warning of them, scattered the others in flight and roused him. Leaning on two slaves, he rose to his feet and immediately fell down again, owing, as I think, to his breathing being obstructed by the thickness of the fumes and congestion of the stomach, that organ being naturally weak and narrow, and subject to inflammation. When daylight returned - two days after the last day he had seen - his body was found untouched, uninjured, and covered, dressed just as he had been in life. The corpse suggested a person asleep rather than a dead man.
Meanwhile my mother and I were at Misenum. But that is of no consequence for the purposes of history, nor indeed did you express a wish to be told of anything except of my uncle's death. So I will say no more, except to add that I have given you a full account both of the incidents which I myself witnessed and of those narrated to me immediately afterwards, when, as a rule, one gets the truest account of what has happened. You will pick out what you think will answer your purpose best, for to write a letter is a different thing from writing a history, and to write to a friend is not like writing to all and sundry.   Farewell.
Pliny, Letters 6.16 (Translated by J Firth, 1900).
116 notes · View notes
Text
Writer ask game ! :D
As I am bored I decided to create that writer ask game :) So here are a few questions that you can ask me or reblog in order to be asked ! Hope y’all like it ! 
(sorry for any mistakes I might have made Iam tired and French lmao)
Tumblr media
How old were you when you started writing ?
Do you remember why you’ve started ?
What was the first thing you’ve ever written ?
How do you feel about what you wrote in the past ?
Have put en end to any WIP so far ? How many ?
What are you favorite genres to write ? Why ?
What are the genres you dislike writing ? Why ?
Are there any genres you would like to try ? Why ?
Do you read the genres you like to write ?
Do you think reading is important to write ? Why/why not ?
Have you ever tried writing poetry ? 
Have you ever written a fan fiction ? Who was it about ?
What is the most difficult obstacle you’ve had to face so far ?
What is something you easily do when it comes to writing or writing process ?
Do you call yourself a writer ? If no, why not ?
Do you like to use characters that appear in a WIP in another WIP which is not related to the first one ?
By the way, how many WIPS are you working on ?
Describe your WIP(s) in a few sentences !
Which one of your WIPs are you the most excited about ?
Would you like your WIP to become a movie ?
If your WIP became a movie, which actors/actresses would you choose to play your characters ? (dream big !!!!)
What is/are you inspiration(s) ?
What do you do when you lose motivation ?
Do you have a time every day/week dedicated to writing or do you write when you feel like doing it ?
Do you use notebooks ? If yes, how do you use them ?
Do you listen to music while writing ?
What is a tool you’ve used that you absolutely love ? Why is it so great ?(a website ? a way of organizing your ideas ? anything !)
Have you ever shown anything you’ve written to anyone ? What did they say ?
Do you have a pen name ? Do you wish to have one ?
Do you inspire yourself from yourself in order to create new characters ? From other people ? Who ?
What is THAT thing you are so excited about when you get a new idea for a new WIP ?
Are some of your friends writers too ? If yes, is it a positive/negative thing and why ? If no, do you wish to have some ?
What are you the most proud of and why ? (a WIP ? a plot ? a character ?)
Have you ever felt like achieving something ?
What is your biggest fear when it comes to your writing and/or WIP(s) ?
5 notes · View notes