#My girlfriend knows this stuff better than me and honestly I don't see anything wrong with it I'm a big friggin fan | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

alharringtonfan · 30 days

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honestly I haven’t been that involved with the whole Alex stuff but am I somewhat not surprised how Chezz and many others are acting this way since the whole “the holier than thou” and “oh don’t worry guys I’m unproblematic and safe uwu” stuff some analog makers have if that explains it and please correct me if I’m wrong but isn’t one of the people that “came out” like also tried accusing Martin of the same shit? Like what.

Honestly I don’t wanna accuse people of anything but I would not be surprised if one day something similar comes out about them.

it’s just feeding a monster that will soon come to bite them in the ass.

I'm pretty sure it's Mitcha who started the grooming thing (always has to be them huh). They also went against Alex but the thing that confuses me is that they warned him about Ven making a callout doc... so, are they a hater or not? I don't know about that whole thing really well because I'm a donut specialist© but searching around the alex tag you'll finds tons of information about them.

100% my friend. Alex tried the same thing back then with Urbanspook and it just reflected back to him like a boomerang. This thing with pretending that you're better than everyone else is complete bullshit, because good people don't have to prove to anyone that they're good in the first place. Same thing with humility. People who are humble don't go around screaming "LOOK! I'M HUMBLE!!! LOOK AT ALL MY GOOD ACTIONS!!" because they don't need to. They show it through their actions and people see them and recognize them as such.

Chezz and Martin are disgusting people that try to mask their filth with a facade of kindness and acceptance. They try to pander to as many people as possible to convince the world that they're genuinely "good"; and to do that, they go for the narrative that's most widespread and accepted by the general public. Because if they would dare to even think about going against the masses, people would pile up on them. And they will do ANYTHING to prevent it from happening. What Martin fears the most (aside from cats apparently) is people hating on him. The guy is so fucking insecure that some mean things said about his series prompted him to take a year-long break. Oh and on this topic I recommend that you check out Radal's reaction to The Walten Files. It's funny and it pisses off Martin so win-win. Their public image is everything they have, they don't care about being genuine. If people will pat their backs and praise them for their behavior and "courage", that's good enough in their books. Same thing with donut, the slanderer queen and master of the anti-alex death cult.

So, don't ever trust people who are too overly accepting of everything, everyone, all the time. Especially if it is compatible with modern culture and media. EVERYONE has the things that they hate, the things that they disagree with. Milquetoast creators like Alex Kaizo and Tyler Osborne, who will just nod along to whatever their audience says and not even conjure a single original thought of their own because they're too afraid to face backlash are fake. They're all plastic without a hint of morality in themselves.

Also, it will DEFINITELY bite them in their asses. Believe me. Kwite and Squizzy collaborated with Slazo's ex girlfriend to try and cancel him over false allegations of abuse. Both of them got canceled. Alex went along the mob and tried to cancel Urbanspook because that was the hip new thing to do at the time. He got canceled as well. It's just something that happens on the internet, and it'll never change because people are willing to remain or at least pretend to be dumb if it gives them likes and a bit of notoriety. Nobody is perfect, and if a meh relationship was enough to get Alex to face all this shit, who knows what will be the catalyst of the next drama. Martin and Chezz are horrible people that do not deserve the audiences that they have. I am without a doubt when I say that they HAVE done something infinitely worse than this. Chezzkids is a serial clout-chaser and grifter, who let the little "fame" he got after calling Urban names (just like the toddler he is) get to his head and inflate his ego to an immense degree. People who are too full of themselves and think they're the best of the best mess up due to a lack of forethought. They are so confident in their abilities that they won't even think about if what they're doing is the right decision to make. And that's why the twat won't ever back down. He's too egotistical to accept defeat just like Ven's cult members defenders. If Chezz is willing to stain the relationship he had with Alex over some crappy highschool level drama, you can already pinpoint his morals and character, and how he truly treats others within his vicinity.

Martin has a server with a security tighter than the CIA. He's afraid to bite the hand that feeds him but it will punch him back when time is most appropriate; despite the lengths he will go to try to keep his image squeaky clean. One can only imagine the shit he has in there and when it'll eventually surface.

Urban "boogeyman" Spook is a better person than 99% of these cardboard cutouts that dare to call themselves creators. They can only destroy. All they create is hate, the sole things they know how to spread are lies and manipulation. They're nothing more than greedy, hateful, cowardly sycophants.

Phew. I feel a lot better now. Thank you for the ask, anon! I hope you're doing fantastic today 🫶

#ask #sue gang rise up #ranting and raving

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northwest-cryptid · 2 months

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A. Thank you for your kind words on this, it's always cool to see people be normal about music instead of insisting I listen to bad stuff.

B. I see that you were unaware of Vaporwave as a music genre so I'm gonna overshare for a moment because I'm autistic about this and I hope that's okay.

Basically as I understand it, and I won't be doing a fully history deep dive but; Vaporwave popped up around 12 years ago with THIS video:

youtube

It's arguably a remix, but it was made via a sample of Chris Deburgh's Lady in Red, you can actually hear the exact sample here at 2:40:

youtube

The song was essentially slowed down and given a sort of reverby-ethereal vibe to the whole thing. Something I overall enjoyed but found a bit too repetitive for me in the original Nobody Here video.

This sort of "Reverbed Ethereal Vibe" carries through a lot of Vaporwave music such as this:

youtube

This one lacks any lyrics at all focusing heavily on melody and I honestly think it's a lot better for it in my opinion because I'm less likely to recognize the repeating than I am with literally two words lol.

Of course, it would be wrong not to mention MACINTOSH PLUS, who basically popularized Vaporwave with FLORAL SHOPPE - 02 リサフランク420 - 現代のコンピュー which you've likely heard before even if you don't recognize the name:

youtube

And now is where it branches off into a ton of different micro sub-genres, you have a ton popping up but the one that caught my eye specifically was Future Funk. A sort of focus on the capitalistic boom of the 80's where new tech was all the rage, and brands meant everything. Except with a sort of fun and lively vibe rather than dystopian capitalistic hell. Future Funk also makes use of a lot of anime aesthetics and city pop / J-pop influences.

The big Future Funk influence of the era was SAINT PEPSI, Pepsi was sort of the artist that people looked to in order to say "sure I like Future Funk, at least the GOOD STUFF that isn't like all that cringe shit, I only listen to SAINT PEPSI because he makes GOOD music." Which is :| but the music slaps. Like if Vaporwave is too slow for you, or you're in the mood for something a little more upbeat, here ya go!

youtube

Right out the gate we can hear so much more energy here. This was sort of set as the norm for Future Funk, but for a lot of artists it strayed too far from it's Vaporwave roots and some took to making music somewhere in the middle, still upbeat and lively but with more of that classic ethereal feel to it.

youtube

To this day I will use this hour long beautiful mix of upbeat future funk classics whenever I'm cleaning the house or driving anywhere or doing anything that really requires me to just have energy.

youtube

This SLAPS and I know it by heart because I'm dumb and I've listened to it significantly too much. I think what really makes it for me is that it's not just a playlist video, it's a proper DJ mix seamlessly moving from one song to the next.

ANYWAYS, yea Vaporwave has a ton of sub genres and stuff to look into if anyone has any interest in it. I admittedly got hardcore into Future Funk but there's almost always something for everyone when it comes to Vaporwave.

You've got artists like Blank Banshee, Manapool, VAPERROR, MACINTOSH PLUS, SAINT PEPSI, ΛDRIΛNWΛVE, Vantage, Future Girlfriend 音楽 , 悲しい Android - Apartment , ミカヅキBIGWAVE

There's a ton, including indie artists like Strawberry Station (who's actually a really nice guy, we've spoken on occasion and it was nice to learn he's a chill dude.)

#Youtube

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ddrqoyote · 3 months

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A Big Fat 🇺🇸🎆🍔-Centric Identity/Heritage Vent

i'm so fucking sick of hearing "if white culture makes you feel empty, identify as what your family was before they assimilated into the social construct" I CAN'T DO THAT THEY'RE ALL ENGLISH.

i don't know where everyone is pulling these 20th century immigrants from but for me everyone going back at least 5 generations was already in the US and assimilated. i have scottish heritage somewhere based on my name but fuck if i know where. my grandma's been maintaining her ancestry.com account for years. it's not in there, which means i probably can't ever find out.

i don't even feel connected to english people. i barely know anything about pre-US english history and most of what i do know is king arthur, the worst kind of christianity, and poverty. there's an english historian in my family, so that's a bad sign.

and apparently everything decent about this country's culture was made or brought in by other people and everything my people made is tainted somehow. the good things always turn out to be exaggerations or just lies. i know that sounds excessive but i just found out dunk tanks were originally racist. fucking DUNK TANKS. even the littlest things. power and business are nice to have but they don't make much of a culture.

my heritage seems to be "cheat and kill better than anyone else, take credit for all our lucky breaks, tell everyone we were pacifist heroes later and if anyone tells the truth, make them shut up". and if i choose not to embrace that i have no heritage at all.

and again, english, so i can't pull some "nope, not me actually" card and hop over to a culture i like better than "generic white". i know that's insulting but it reminds me of when i was in high school and i was mad at myself for being straight and "part of the problem". it turned out i was queer so it wasn't my problem anymore, but i never actually solved my issues with it, i just found an escape hatch.

also i'm jealous and salty. the rest of yall (another word i thought was ours but isn't), even if you can never get back what you lost, at least you know there WAS something. it's a tragedy but it's not your people's fault. for me... was there ever anything of substance at all?

oh yeah. i'm queer so most of my ancestors would probably hate me anyway, or have values i think are disgusting. joy.

"why not queer english then?" besides the fact a lot of them haven't treated me right? because honestly, when i hear about our history from just 40 years ago i feel like it was a completely different world. i don't feel continuity from stonewall or the aids crisis to my own life. even today, i see some homeless gay teen whose parents kicked them out and i'm furious for them as a human being, but i'm not their people and i know they wouldn't think a middle-class CPA hopeful with supportive parents was theirs either. we've had completely different lives.

and frankly, thinking about our recent past and the injustice of it all makes me want to projectile vomit.

i've tried talking this stuff out with my friends but... my girlfriend has a god complex (/gen /pos) and doesn't understand why i need a heritage, or any culture larger than a friend group. my next-closest political friend is both european and kinda using communism as a replacement for heritage, and everyone else i'm either not close enough to talk about this or they don't care about this stuff.

(also, and this is a genuine question so please reblog and explain if i'm wrong, why is, say, blackness more real than whiteness? they were both manufactured at similar times by english people, a bunch of groups lumped together regardless of heritage, but i consistently hear people say one is real and the other is not.

i know most black people can't find out their original ancestries anymore but identifying as black is clearly more than "the only available option" for people. it feels like the unspoken answer is "ours is good and yours is evil" but of course no one wants to say they think that way out loud.)

the point is. i feel like i've been in a culture of one my whole life. i'm not proud of my heritage and without it i feel a gaping emptiness without roots and a pinch of essentialism to tell me what to be. no, i shouldn't, my girlfriend never stops telling me BUT I DO.

does anyone else have this problem.

#whiteness #these notes are either gonna be empty or hell there's no in-between #vent #identity #ethnicity #rant post

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running-in-the-dark · 2 years

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I really wish gaslighting wasn't one of those terms that gets misused to the point of losing its meaning.

I need to vent and this is going to be long, so -

I just watched a long video about gaslighting. it was by a psychologist and it was pretty in depth. and it basically confirmed that my mother has been gaslighting me (and the rest of my family) my entire life.

she always invalidates my feelings (I have no reason to be upset, I shouldn't be crying, I'm not hurt, nothing happened so I have no reason to be angry). she lies about doing or not doing things. big things, but also small, insignificant things. she also has a very, very good memory. I don't. she knows the birthday of everyone she's ever known, everyone's phone numbers, what she did on a specific day 40 years ago, everything. I can barely remember what I did last week (I just tried, I honestly have no idea).

so it's always been hard to argue with her about this stuff. proof doesn't matter. other people confirming my experience because they were also there doesn't matter. she says she has a great memory, she remembers everything exactly as it was, how could she possibly be wrong?

it doesn't matter that I know I'm right. it doesn't matter that often, other people can confirm I'm right. it doesn't matter that we all often talk about her doing this, so it's not just me. I still can never believe my version of things. not just with her, with everyone. even on my own. I can't trust myself because I've been conditioned to believe that I must be wrong. she won't listen, she won't admit I'm right, so I must be wrong. it's the only logical explanation.

why else would someone do this? why would they keep insisting on their version of things if it's not true?

for the longest time, everyone else just always believed her. I was a 'difficult' teenager (= severely depressed, neglected, suicidal) so of course I was just being dramatic and argumentative for no reason. why would my mother lie? it's absurd, of course she wouldn't. so I had to be a liar and a bad person.

there's things that I know - KNOW - she is lying about. like the time she disappeared to live with her boyfriend in the Black Forest for several months. I was 10 or 11, so I didn't even remember how long it was exactly, my dad told me later. all I knew was: she disappeared, I didn't see her for so long that when I did finally see her again, it was like meeting a stranger. it doesn't matter to me where she was that entire time. I know there was at least a year where I did not see her at all (my brothers did, I remember that, but I definitely didn't. that moment of seeing her again is not something I'll ever forget, the feeling was.. extremely unsettling).

but I can never talk about that. she gets ... furious if I try. says my dad made that all up, or his then-girlfriend, or I'm imagining, exaggerating, misremembering. my dad's dead, so he can't confirm it (and he never did when he was alive either. no one but me ever directly contradicts her about anything). my brothers were too young to really understand any of it, and they've lived with her much longer than I did. she's talked to them about it enough that they wouldn't believe me.

I think the reason I felt so much better when I was in therapy was that it meant there was an outside person, someone objective, who could confirm that my thoughts and feelings and experiences weren't irrational. that my mother's behaviour isn't normal. it doesn't matter that *I know* it isn't - I'm wrong. it doesn't matter that the few friends I've talked about this stuff with told me it isn't - they like me, so they must be lying to me. that's what she's always said, after all. so it must be true.

the thing that makes this all much more complicated now is that I think my mother might have dementia. she's in her late 60s, and she's been forgetting things. not things she'd have any reason to lie about - nothing she could use to manipulate anyone. she forgot I have a tattoo that I've had for years. it was a big deal when I got it, she wouldn't stop being mean about it, so I definitely remember that I showed it to her at the time. my husband and my brothers also remember (she really made a big deal out of it). she was clearly distressed when we kept insisting she knew this. there's been other things she forgot that we've definitely talked about. and my brothers have mentioned she keeps telling them the same stories again as if it's the first time - they don't seem concerned about this, just annoyed.

I've been thinking (worrying) about that a lot lately, and it's made me realise how fucking complicated this is because of... the way she is. it's basically impossible to explain my worries about this without explaining 'actually she does just lie about things all the time, or she really remembers everything completely differently, who knows, so it's difficult to know if this is just part of that somehow'. that's not normal. no one understands that.

unfortunately, the more I think about any of this the more I feel like it's probably all in my head, and actually everything is probably just all in my head. she keeps saying our childhood was good so maybe it was.

maybe she didn't disappear, maybe she really never yelled, maybe I was a horrible child, maybe it was my fault somehow. maybe I am selfish. maybe I really was horrible that one time when I called her a bitch because swearing is bad and disrespectful (doesn't matter that I said it because she yelled some horrible, disgusting things at me. and that I was 14/15. it was 15 years ago and she still brings it up as an example of how bad I am). maybe I was a monster for biting her a couple of times when she wouldn't let me leave the room and wouldn't stop yelling and I was in a corner and I was scared (but she definitely never slapped me in the face so hard that my lip started bleeding and then wouldn't let me get out of the car and go to my dad's place, so I was stuck in the car for over an hour while she went to her dentist appointment. I just made that up and then never told anyone about it for.. reasons, I guess).

maybe I made up the time she laughed in my face when I was sobbing and asking her 'why can't you just be nice like other mothers?' and she said 'you should be grateful that I don't look or dress like the other moms in [her village]' because apparently her looks are more important than the way she treats me. maybe all the times I wrote her a letter explaining why the way she treated me hurt me, only for her to read them to everyone and then laugh at me, are just in my head too.

I wish I was exaggerating, sometimes I really do wonder if I'm just a horrible lying monster who is mean for no reason. I always think everyone I talk to must know I'm awful and a liar. all the time. sometimes I believe her when she says my brothers are even scared of me because I'm so horrible all the time (doesn't matter that I know it's not true).

even in therapy I could never fully explain why I can't believe my own thoughts even when I know I'm right, and why no amount of being told 'you're right, this isn't okay' changes anything about that. I still can't. I need external validation for the smallest things and I don't think I ever realised just how much that affects my life.

#I don't know if this counts but I think I should tag it anyway #tw abuse #negativity #tw trauma #I feel like I should apologise for writing this #and for everything else. including just.. existing #shouldn't have watched that video I guess. too many thoughts #fuck it's 7am I really need to sleep #I don't even remember what I wrote but it doesn't matter #personal

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hospitalterrorizer · 5 months

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diary64

11/14-15/2023

tuesday-wednesday

almost made cookies.

i've made the dough, though, so it's resting in the fridge for tomorrow. it will be better that way anyways i think. hopefully they will taste good.

otherwise, today i didn't record vocals but i did start work on a new thing, it should be done tomorrow i think, i just want to find a final sort of riff for it. or i guess just put it into midi, i think i wrote something good, but maybe i'd like to use that for another thing instead, who knows. i wouldn't mind a 20 second long pv song. the interview did also come out, but i have some problems, not with the interview, my friend kelly did a great job with that. just with like, how the pictures came out. i don't know why but i look so awful and it's made me spiral, since i'm so stupidly sensitive about that. it just makes me wonder if that's what people actually see when they look at me, if that's how i actually look, or if they really just have been edited terribly. i can't stand it, the pictures of myself i took that day, even the ones that aren't the most flattering, don't make me look that ugly.

look at the pics i took that i'm not super into:

and this last one is especially unflattering imo:

the pics in the interview are like, crazy, i don't know. i can't tell if i don't look like that or not but they feel like they make me look way more like, mannish, and give me way more shadow. is it just an hdr thing, are people's eyes just more forgiving than camera lenses, or do my selfies and these photos just not really capture the whole, like, issue, that is my face. they also make me look fat. that's one i can't explain at all. it's very weird. i literally feel like i look like a different person, and i go look in the mirror and try and see that and can't really. i dunno. i think the guy who took the pictures is like, maybe not great but has a good camera, so he's eligible for taking pictures for a low level thing like this. i can't believe though, that for some reason, this is the article that has the most views on this website. how disturbing. i don't like that people i know are looking at that, and saying, wow that's them (or whatever). it actually really bothers me. i'm sure this is going to be something i am dealing with for a couple weeks. unfortunately i can't talk to my girlfriend about this in any kind of constructive way (is there even a constructive way, though?). she blames herself for me doing the interview, which is wrong for a myriad of reasons, and she i guess feels guilty for getting people to see it, when as i've now seen it, i don't want anyone to see it, the pictures at least. they're literally so fucked up, and since i've either looked like that, or since i've been made to look like that, i don't know if i can trust mirrors or anything/ memories of what i look like (i already don't know if mirrors are trustworthy or not, honestly, the discrepancies between them and cameras wigs me out and i don't know if there's anything there that should actually be wigging me out), but i don't even know if i will ever know what i look like. i've talked about depending very much on outside perspective, having one that now says basically that i'm ugly, or feels like it communicates/presents that, is very troubling. it makes you want to give up, kind of.

give up has an obvious meaning, i think. i also can't post them here, the images, it'd make me freak to look at them more. but i'm leaving the tab open because i know i'm going to have to go check and check and check and make sure that it feels like it's because the images were edited badly and stuff.

whatever, though. i am gonna sleep soon. maybe tomorrow i'll understand better what the focal length did to my face and what makes me feel so ugly for no reason. maybe this will make me do something really good for vocals since i feel distantly hopeless for stupid reasons.

it's intolerable, the feeling that people look at it, and see me in that, it literally feels like out of my hands, i am not myself anymore, it's like a tulpa. i want to puke and cry, it's that bad, really.

listening to palatka right now is nice, for this at least.

anyway tomorrow i still have to export those songs i have re-done vox for, and other stuff. maybe i will write new lyrics for some of these songs that still have none, that would be good. and i guess i can do the song that has lyrics but no vox still. that should be fun. i just need to get everything started earlier tomorrow.

today i also mostly vc'd so it wasn't a waste of a day, not eaten wholly by misery, the vc and the music i did and guitar playing i did feels good. in the vc we just played a silly drawing game, which i was bad at mostly, at first i felt really really stupid, but the stupid feeling went away. i guess i was just too nervous at first i guess. i don't know why. social games like that make me feel like i need to perform or something.

i really wish i intuitively understood guitar stuff better, but i think i'm getting there, i just need to play more, the practice i'm doing i think is very good. playing hardcore feels like a really good thing for me, i dunno. i hope so. i really like it at least. learning the tricks these bands do is really fun for me, even if it's all really stupidly obvious. just ways to move power chords around and make them weird, and then all the crazy stuff with the half step up/down notes i can do, figuring ways to get all that together in a song is really fun. i'm looking forward to that tomorrow i suppose.

anyway, trying to think of more positives in my life so i don't feel like braining myself. obviously i can't, i love my girlfriend too much, i feel bad that she feels bad about this. it really has very little to do with her. she suggested the interview but i said yes, i showed up even though i knew a little before that a guy i wouldn't like was going to be there. i should have expected this too, but i really hoped i wouldn't look so ugly.

but whatever, i will be okay, i think, so,

byebye!!!!

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abs0luteb4stard · 1 year

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My oldest friend had been bombarding me with messages all the time. Pictures, text and so on. They post the pictures to their Facebook anyhow, I see them, I've told them nice way "I see them on your Facebook wall all the time" and they just keep on doing it.

He texts me "wanna chat/play Xbox". I don't have time or I'm doing some project, my hands are dirty, greasy, in can't respond. Then I get "hey sir?" 5 mine's later. Then more stuff like that.

Then other times I might post a news article on my Facebook, and he thinks that's a sign he can "hey you wanna chat", "what's up", "you busy?", "you home?", "wanna Xbox or..." In rapid succession with pictures and text and so on.

Like I can't give you my attention 24/7. Outta like he's texting out of boredom, rather than to actually connect. I'm not on call for all of your chatting needs. Or your work room gossip.

I may be actively available for checking my news feed, but I might not feel like, you know, chatting and people-ing.

You might see I'm Online but I'm unavailable to be your constant complaint inbox "ugh, 2 more hours to go" or "what a day..." OR "guess what?"

Using wording which shows you want a response, instead of coming out with it! Because you've learned bad conversation habits to get me to listen to your day-to-day complaints and gossip.

I said, "You're just overloading me, man. Getting pictures every day, about some letters in an isle at the store or figures that you post on your own FB that I see anyhow.

You're killing me man, it's a lot.

I don't want to hurt your feelings, but chill a bit for me, bro."

I've never set a boundary until now. I think I am being nice. I've even been subtley semi-mean and apologized. Just to see what's going to happen, but he just goes blank and can't even even apologize for his constant bombardment of me?

He figures I'm just in a "mood" or something? I dunno.

There's times I was semi mean and when I actually do chat he's like "you in a better mood Mr doo-doo pants" to be playful or subtly stick it to me. I dunno.

But honestly I didn't think he sees a problem with his message bombardment. Or his nagging.

I'm a individual. I'm not his conjoined twin. I'm not his goddamn spouse. I'd at least find someone less pushy, oblivious or not.

He's probably complaining about me to others, "why's he accruing like this?", "What did I do wrong?" And they're having a girlfriends kind of bash about me "you didn't do anything".

It's not me, it's definitely you. You're a smothering texter and you need to sort out your expectations.

#my thoughts #social media #digital availability #my journal

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kpop---scenarios · 3 years

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Cravings || One

Pairing: Vampire! Hongjoong x Reader

Warning: None Yet

Word Count: 3.1k

A/N: If you would like to be tagged, let me know!

"Babe, hey babe." Your boyfriend, Chad calls out to you, as you're sitting at the kitchen table, running over over bills again and trying to figure out how the fuck you're going to try to pay everything. You worked damn hard, and barely had anything to show for it. Ever since Chad had moved in a few months ago, without an invitation, you were stressed. Everything had gone up and doubled since he hadn't left, and he also hadn't contributed anything financially towards the household. You paid for rent, utilities, groceries and you even paid when the two of you went out for dinner. Chad worked full time, but where his money was going, you had no fucking idea. He constantly went out with his 'boys' , often coming home obliterated, and just expecting you to have your legs spread open for him when he rolled in, apparently that was your duty as his girlfriend, according to him. As if not contributing and acting like a man child was such a turn on. Not to mention the countless hours he spent on your gaming console, yelling and talking to his friends, leaving you no time to play any games that you like, unless you wanted to wake up a few hours before you had to work to sneak on it. But by the time you got home from work, cleaned up the messes he made throughout the day, made yourself dinner, showered and got into your PJ'S, you were too damn tired to do anything. You knew you had to wake up the next day and do it all over again, so any sleep you got was precious.

A part of you often wondered why you were in this relationship with him. Maybe you were scared to be alone, maybe you didn't think you could do any better than him, but you stuck with him, because for some reason, you loved the guy.

"What do you want, Chad?" You sigh, walking into the living room where he's sprawled out on the couch, headset on and his match paused. "I'm trying to figure out bills, you know that thing that keeps us warm, and with light and hot water, that you said you'd help pay and haven't."

"Yeah, babe, can you go to the corner store and get those Takis, you know the ones I like? The not so spicy ones though babe, cause remember I have acid reflux, and a diet coke." He says, turning back to the screen, laughing at something said through his head phones.

You could feel the rage building up inside of you, awfully quick, and it was seeping out of you even quicker.

"Are you going to pay for said snacks?" You ask, trying to keep your voice calm.

"What?" He laughs. "Babe, no, come on. I'm broke. I don't get paid again for two weeks. You know this."

"You just got paid yesterday." You breathe through gritted teeth. "Where the hell did all your money go?" You ask, your hands balled into fists.

"You know babe, I had the fantasy football league entry, plus I owed Kyle money for the keg bomber last weekend, and I took the boys out for supper yesterday. Shit adds up." He says, never looking at you, only focusing on the game.

"And that's my problem, why exactly? Why is it always on me just because you're not financially stable. Grow up, you're 35 for christ sakes!" You yell. You stomp to the kitchen, grabbing your purse and slipping on your shoes before heading back into the living room.

"Yeah, she's got her shoes and purse." He laughs. "She's definitely going to get my stuff."

"You know what Chad? I'm definitely not going to get your snacks, get your own fucking snacks, Chaaad. I'm going for a drink, with my own goddamn money." You spit, storming out of the house.

You're wandering down the street, like you had been for the last thirty five minutes, and finally you found somewhere that looked decent enough. You walk in, and the lights are on very low, the place is almost dark, had it not been for the red lights swinging above tables, or the string of red lights wrapping around the ceiling. Your eyes wander the open floor of seating as a soft beat vibrates through the building. Every person in here who was sitting with someone was leaning closely to that person, seemingly having an intense conversation. The vibes felt dark and eerie, but you welcomed it, you enjoyed it instead of being around Chad's fuck boy mentality. You walk towards the bar, sliding onto one of the empty bar stools and setting your purse on your lap. Your eyes were looking down when you felt a presence standing in front of you. You look up and see quite possibly the most beautiful man you have ever seen.

"What can I get for you?" He asks, his voice is deep, yet so smooth and calming.

"Double vodka and coke please, and for the love of god, keep them coming." You sigh. After your comment you see the slightest hint of a smile appear on his lips, disappearing even quicker than it came.

"Bad day?" He asks, beginning to pour your drink.

"Bad relationship." You groan. He nods his head as he slides your drink towards you.

"Wanna talk about it?" He asks, leaning on the bar with his chin resting on his hands as he waits for you to speak. You look into his eyes, and they're so warm and mesmerizing, you felt safe and secure, like you could tell him anything. Which is exactly what you did.

"What's your name?" You ask.

"Hongjoong." He replies. "You?"

"Y/N."

"Okay Y/N, what's bothering you?"

"My boyfriend, we've been together for just over a year, and well.. he's something, and not the good something like people usually say. He moved in with me, without even asking me if I wanted to, and I just kind of accepted it. He doesn't pay anything, no bills, rent, groceries, nothing. It's all on me, even though he does work full time. He forgot my birthday, went out and got absolutely plastered with his 'boys'. On Valentine's Day, he took me out for dinner, and can you guess who was there?" You ask.

"His boys?" He answered.

"You sir, are correct. I was ignored the entire evening, and then he and his boys left, I ended up paying the bill, and I had to uber home because he had driven us there. Not to mention the fact that he assumes I'm just there for his pleasure, expecting me to be spread eagle for him whenever he decides to show up." You finish, chugging your drink as you try not to gag on the strong taste of vodka.

"Why are you with him then? He doesn't sound like he contributes to the relationship at all, so why do you stay?" He asks.

'Honestly, I'm not entirely sure." You answer as he slides another drink in front of you.

"Now that's a bullshit excuse." He replies. "There's a reason that you clearly don't want to admit."

"Do you ever smile?" You ask him.

"No." He answers. "Now, why won't you leave him?"

"Because it's safe, I guess? I don't know if I can do any better than him." You shrug.

"Y/N, you have no idea how much better you could do." He says.

From the moment Hongjoong had a whiff of the scent that was coming into his bar, he knew that it was the scent of the one. He intensely watched the door, waiting for the one it belonged too to walk through the door. As soon as you did, it was almost as though his heart could have started beating once again, the ice cold blood that ran through his body could have turned warm just by the sight of you. He isn't sure what it is about you, but he had always been told that he would know when he found the one, and having been alive for over a century, he had just assumed that it wasn't in the cards for him, and now he knows why. Because all his life he had been waiting for you. The person that he would do anything for, the person that he would be anything for had finally walked into his life, and for once he felt an ounce of hope, until, you had mentioned the filthy human you were in a relationship with, not to mention one that treated you like absolute garage, and you had assumed that no one better would love you, but shit were you ever wrong. He was standing right in front of you, and though you had just met him, he loved you with everything he had and would do anything and everything to protect you.

"I appreciate your advice, Hongjoong, but it's getting late and I have to work tomorrow." You sigh. "How much do I owe you?" You ask, grabbing your card from your wallet.

"It's on me." He tells you, grabbing your empty glass.

"Well thank you." You smile. "It was nice meeting you." You tell him as you slide off the stool.

"You too." He says, watching you walk away from him.

That night when you got home, you couldn't get Hongjoong off your mind, a smile spread across your face as you walked through your front door, and headed into the living room, then it instantly dropped. Chad had not moved from the spot you had previously left him in a few hours ago. "Oh, babe." He says, sucking the cheeto dust from his fingers. "Kyle brought me some snacks, since you threw a huge temper tantrum about my snacks, you can just venmo or cash app him, k?" He says, going back to playing his game.

You went to bed that night, dreaming of one man, who was not your man.

Over the next few weeks, you had absolutely no desire to be at home. So you headed to the bar that Hongjoong worked at, everyday after work for a drink, or two, or four. In those weeks the two of you spent an ample amount of time getting to know each other, you were sure he knew you better than Chad ever did. You didn't want to see Chad, you didn't want to be near him and it was bad enough that he constantly texted you throughout the day, sending you lists of things to buy from the grocery store, as if he wasn't able to do it himself. But much to your surprise, he didn't text you when you never came home with his snacks, he didn't check in with you throughout the day, and honestly it no longer bothered you.

You felt your feelings for Hongjoong deepen with every encounter the two of you had, every time you saw him it was like nothing you had ever felt with Chad, your emotions were amplified around Hongjoong and you weren't sure how much longer you could keep them hidden.

"One more." You tell Hongjoong, as you set down your fourth glass.

You can tell he wants to smile, but he's too good at controlling his emotions. "You've had enough, I'm cutting you off." He tells you.

You pout, trying to give him your best puppy dog eyes, but absolutely nothing got to the man and it was frustrating as fuck.

"A bad storm is coming, you should probably get home." He tells you, drying off some glasses.

"I don't want to go home, he's there." You scoff, just thinking about Chad made you want to vomit. "I guess I could just get a motel room, at that place across the street." You say, pointing over to the run down motel, that had flickering lights, and probably a rat and cockroach infestation.

"You will do no such thing." Hongjoong replies. "You can stay at my place." He says. "Give me a minute." He walks from around the bar, towards the back of the building, and you can't help but to turn in your stool and watch him walk away, damn he looks good.

Within seconds he's back, grabbing your bag and scooping you up into his arms as he effortlessly carries you out the door.

"I can walk." You object.

"I know." He says, his face stone cold.

"You're very pale." You tell him, as if he didn't know.

"I know." He replies, unlocking the door to his car.

"And you're very cold." You say.

He sighs. "I know." He finishes as he slides you into the passenger seat of his car.

As soon as he started his car, the rain began pouring as thunder and lightning jolted the sky.

"You were right, there's a storm." You say, watching out your window.

"I know." He replies, this time it sounded different. You turned to look at him, hoping you'd catch him smiling but no such luck.

He continues driving, taking you out into the middle of nowhere, out of city limits, this was it, this was probably when you died. You panicked slightly but you felt it in your entire body that he was not going to murder you, at least not that night.

Hongjoong pulls up to a gate, punching in a few numbers to open the gate, which just blocked off a winding road. You squinted as you tried to see where you were going but it was far too dark for you to see anything, until you pulled up to a beautiful mid-century mansion that made your mouth drop. It was absolutely stunning and you couldn't believe that he lived there.

"Seriously? This is where you live?" You say.

"MY family, but yeah." He answers, parking the car near the entrance.

He hops out of his seat, walking towards your side to open the door for you, pulling you inside before you get too wet. He dragged you up a large flight of stairs, not letting you admire the inside of his house. He put you inside a large room, with a large bed and a bathroom ensuite. "There's towels if you want to shower, I'll be back in a bit to check on you." He says, avoiding all eye contact before walking out of the room.

You let out a deep breath as you take off your heels, unbutton your pants and unhook your bra, placing it all next to the bed. You sit down on the bed in your underwear and t-shirt, wondering what to do, until your phone rings.

Looking at the caller ID, you didn't want to answer it, but you felt it would be unfair for you to do so.

"Hello?" You answer.

"Hey babe, it's me.. it's Chad." He says.

"I know who it is." You sigh.

"Look.. I know you've been terrible, oh, wait, I mean I've been terrible in our relationship lately but I want to make almonds." He says. "No idiot, it's amends." You hear from the background.

"Are you kidding me right now? Do you seriously have Brad over to help you?" You yell.

"Well yeah, he noticed that we were drifting apart and offered to help me get you back." Chad explains.

You get up off the bed, pacing on the hardwood floors as you tried to process what he just said to you.

"The fact that you didn't even notice that we were drifting apart is all that I need to hear. You know what, Chad? I'm done. I'm done with this relationship, I'm done with you. Just get out of my apartment, I'm over it." You yell, hanging up the phone.

You stand there, taking deep breaths as you replay the conversation you just had, he didn't even care enough to notice that you'd been pulling away. That kind of hurt, but then again it was Chad. He was never very perceptive.

A knock at the door before it suddenly opens, reveals Hongjoong, walking into the room. He tried to play it cool with the fact that you were practically naked in front of it.

"I heard yelling. You okay?" He asks as lightning strikes, causing the power to flicker.

"Chad called, he had his friend Brad over to feed him lines because Brad noticed we were drifting apart." You explain. "But I did it. I ended things." You proudly admit.

"Good for you." He says, staring at you, while you stare back at him. A crack of thunder hits loudly, making you jump, and within seconds Hongjoong's arms are wrapped around you, like he was protecting you. You look at him and he looks at you, and before you can tell yourself not to, your lips are pressed against him, and he is kissing you back.

The kiss turns passionate and needy in seconds, both of your desires for one another coming out without any control. He moves you both to the bed, laying you down as he hovers over you, his strong arms keeping him above you. You wrap your arms and legs around him, pulling his body closer to yours, feeling him near was all you'd wanted. His ice cold fingers touch your stomach as he begins to lift your shirt up, you can feel his cock slowly becoming harder. You begin lifting his shirt, when his phone rings. He stands up, whispering an apology before answering his phone, barely speaking any words.

"I'm so sorry, Y/N. I have some things to take care of." He says.

"Oh, yeah, no problem." You say, sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Get some sleep." He tells you before walking out of the bedroom door, leaving you alone once again.

You tried to fight the exhaustion you felt, but it was far too hard. You got snuggled underneath the blankets, watching the door, hoping he would come back but your eyelids got too heavy for you to keep open, and you swiftly drifted off to sleep, finally feeling some peace.

The warm sun was shining into the room, waking you up. You let out a little stretch before opening your eyes, only to see five men standing around you. You sit up, moving to the wall, as these men stare at you. You looked at them all, and they all looked similar to Hongjoong. Pale skin, dark eyes, dark head, blood red lips.

"Who are you?" One of them asks.

"Y/N." You whisper.

Another one speaks up, looking at the other four men. "Who the fuck brought a human home?"

#kpopscape #noonasinnetwork #ateez hongjoong #hongjoong #kim hongjoong #vampire hongjoong #ateez #vampire ateez #ateez imagines #ateez smut #hongjoong smut #kpop fanfic #kpop scenarios #kpop writing #kpop icons #kpop imagines #kpop smut

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lostysworld · 3 years

Text

A healing touch – Kaz Brekker x reader

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 (final)

Pairing: Kaz Brekker x reader

Warning: OOC (I hope it's not too much in this chapter :D), a little bit of angst.

Summary: something inevitable happens, that causes you to reveal your true feelings

A/N: I hope guys, you'll like it) Also I was hit by the song "Paradise" by Chase Atlantic, and I think it's perfect for them here))

Masterlist

The weather is perfect. Perfect for visiting your friends in the Crow Club. You don't have any plans for the whole day, and not even for helping your parents in the bakery, so you decide to spend this morning with pleasure.

The anticipation of seeing Kaz is so strong, after yesterday's evening, that your fingertips are tingling with joy. Does it mean, he will finally start treating you another way, more...intimate.

But when you come up to the club's doors, two men from Brekker's guard block your way. As you want to ask what the matter is, Jasper appears behind their backs.

– It's okay, guys. Let me settle this, - he claps their shoulders and comes to you.

– What's going on, Jas? - it is strange, that you are not allowed to go further. The boy's glance changes from cheerful to sympathetic one.

– I'm afraid, you are banished, Y/N.

– What?! Kaz banished me?

What you could possibly do to cause such a move from the man. When you left him yesterday's night, everything was alright.

– I want to talk to him.

– Y/N, I don't think-

– He banished me from the club, and, as I suppose, from the Slat too, and if it's his decision, I will not argue. But I only want to know the reason, Jas, - for a second you are peering at each other intensely. – Do I not deserve it?

– You do.

– Lead the way, then.

You may be a ray of sunshine, as others see you, but you also have a strength to fight back, if it's necessary. And now it is the time.

The wooden ladder squeaks under your steps, and you can swear, that Kaz already learns about your presence in the club. Well, he'd better know.

On the last stair you step forwards in front of Jasper, opening the door in Kaz's office. The man is sitting behind his table, showered with different documents. Rapidly he raises his head to meet you in the doorway.

Jasper takes a step back and leaves you two for his own sake.

Brekker furrows, his jaw's clenched.

– As far as I know, you are banished form the club, Y/N.

– We both know, I don't obey your orders.

You look at each other with such anger and rage, but deeply in your chest you still feel resentment towards him.

– What the matter, Kaz, - you throw you hands up, coming closer. Brekker doesn't move, he doesn't even take a step back from you. – Have I done something wrong?

Your eyes are roaming across his face. Kaz looks tired, as if he didn't sleep that night at all, dark circles under his eyes become more visible.

– Nothing, - he stands out of the table, leaning on its side now with arms crossed on his chest.

– Nothing? Is it your answer? - the man is still silent. – Don't want to give me a reason?

Of course he doesn't have to, but you think, he will do it as your friend. Even if you see him as much more than a friend to you.

– Kaz, we are friends-

– Yes...'friends', - his voice is full of unhidden venom, that makes you furious and lost at the same time. – Your friends are downstairs, and you still can meet them outside of the club.

You still don't understand, but something tells you, Brekker won't explain you anything. He has his own strange reasons, and, like everything else about him, you just have to accept this.

The man waves you off.

– If it's all, - he switches his displeased gaze on you. – I still have a lot of work.

Is it the end? He just doesn't want to see you anymore.

– Of course, Mr. Brekker, - he flinches barely visibly from your addressing. – I will no longer bother you.

You comes out, slamming the door behind your back.

Kaz closes his tired eyes rubbing his face. What did you want to hear from him? What could he possibly tell? That he doesn't want you here because of the constant life-threatening? That he serves as a magnet for all killers in Ketterdam, and is afraid that you will pay his price?

You'd better stay in your little shiny bakery and never met him in years.

The sudden urge to abandon it all and stop you from leaving is overweighted by his common sense, and he just throws everything from his table in anger.

Kaz Brekker is never drunk, but now something is driving him to the bottle of whiskey in his drawer.

Even if the man doesn't want to remember this now, the day, when he first met Y/N, is so vivid in front of his eyes.

Flashback.

It is a winter evening, almost night, calm and snowy, and Kaz comes out of the Slat to find Jasper, whom all of them are waiting for discussing the next heist. And why he of all of people, should look for him?

It is cold, and the man shrugs his shoulders. His leather gloves don't bring him any warm at all and his fingertips start freezing.

After a half an hour of wandering across the town, he finally hears that familiar voice and sees Jasper along with a young woman, who the boy is hugging with one arm.

– Why should I search for you, Jasper, while you're having fun with another girlfriend of yours?

Brekker is grim, but after one glance at the girl next to Jas, he feels a bit confused. Her wide y/c eyes seem looking right inside his soul.

– I'm not his girlfriend.

As fast as the boy opens his mouth to explain, the girl cuts him off. Her voice is calm, but the man catches a sparkle of surprise in it.

Jasper waves her to Brekker.

– It's Kaz, he's my boss, - the girl steps forwards and extends her arms for a handshake.

– Nice to meet you, Kaz, - a mischievous sparkle shines inside her gaze. – I'm Y/N.

Her voice rings, not getting lost in a noisy crowd. The way the young woman calls his name sounds...nice, and Brekker blinks for several times to return his previous cold demeanor.

She still stands with her hand awaiting for his reaction, and when Jasper wants to say about Brekker's touch aversion, the man instantly grabs her hand in his and shakes.

– Kaz Brekker, miss.

Her touch is warm, he feels it even through his glove. And all of her radiates with warmness, actually Kaz thinks it's a smell of baked bread.

A knowing grin appears on Jasper's face and he decides to keep quiet instead.

End of flashback.

Slowly you became a part of the team, and Kaz wondered for a thousand of times, how natural your presence was. It felt like the Crows have been knowing you for their whole lives.

And now you are gone, and it is his fault only. But Kaz would better know that you're safe, somewhere far away from him and his doubtful fortune.

The chilly wind becomes colder, as you make your way around Ketterdam, deciding not to come back to the bakery after your fight with Kaz. Otherwise you couldn't escape your mother's questions.

Slowly your anger calms down, and while the night falls on the town, you find yourself near the Slat.

Knowing this area you would never appear here in this time of the day or without any company, like Jas or Inej. Like Kaz.

You shake your head. Kaz kicks you out of his club like you have never belonged there, severing all the ties between you.

You feel yourself like a little naive girl, who is twisted around the finger will all your trust and friendship stuff.

There is no one except you on a narrow dark street, where only one lamppost is lit. Suddenly you hear steps behind you, that are echoing from dull stone walls of slams.

You turn around to see two men coming to you, as cold shiver runs down your spine. No way it can end up well.

You fasten you steps, noticing that the two behind you do the same. When you start running, you already abandon all thoughts about escaping alive.

In the end you bump into a wall, that can mean only a dead end of the street. Perfect, just perfect. Intending to come back while it's not that late, you doesn't notice a dark side street between two old houses, that may be your escape route.

But you still hesitate, and when you refuse to go there, someone's arm grabs you and drags into the alley.

Instantly a gloved hand closes your mouth, in case you want to scream. This familiar glance of Kaz in front of you calms down your rapidly beating heart, that pounds in your throat.

You exhale in relief, and both stand like this until the strangers' step disappear. He is so close to you, there is no an inch of space in between, but his palm. Slowly, he drops his hand, making sure that you won't scream.

He looks at you intensely like this for some minutes, and when the street is empty and silent, Brekker takes a step back.

– What the hell are you doing! - of course you could thank him first, but just can't hold back these words.

– Follow me.

He nods and goes further, not looking at you, trying to bring you to the safe place. After some time you find yourselves at the Slat with no Crows on the first floor.

Without a word you come with him into his room. Honestly, you don't have a slightest idea, what he is going to tell you now, after you morning incident.

The door is closed, and it feels like your freedom is cut off by his own hands.

– When I last saw you, I was a whiny pain in the ass, - you arch a brow at him. – And now you are waiting for me on the streets to save from a pair of thugs.

Brekker is silently watching you and it starts to drive you mad.

– Did you bring me here to keep quite, Kaz? - you watch him turn with his back to you and freeze. – At least tell me, what were you doing-

– That is the reason! - Brekker slams his hand on the table surface, and you flinch. – You think, that I don't care, but it's not true.

– Kaz-

– I banished you from the club, because I simply don't want you dead. Or this day didn't teach you anything?

– So you don't want me here? - your gaze is locked on the man. – You just throw me out.

– Is it the only thing you've heard?

– Than why I'm here now?

You know, he wants you alive, it is his only intention, but it's time for you to settle this. When Brekker doesn't respond, you go on.

– Oh, I can tell you, why, - you take several steps towards him, and the man doesn't move away. – Because I'm much safer here, in the Crow club or in the Slat, doesn't matter. Any place, where you are, I'm safer, Kaz.

– But you...you deserve more than the Crow club or the Slat, - he comes up to you, leaving a short distance between. – You deserve so much more, Y/N, and I can't give you that.

It is enough. Your emotions overwhelm you, and all anger, resentment and longing for the man you love now turn into tears, that are just flowing freely down your cheeks. You know every thing, that Kaz thinks about himself, and you just want him to shut up. Only because he deserves more too.

– I'm not asking for more, Brekker. Why don't you see it?

– Why are you so stubborn? - Kaz shortens the distance, taking his gloves off. He is watching a stray tear on your cheek, but can't force himself to raise his hand and brush it off.

– Because I love you, Kaz. If you want it or not.

The man stays speechless. Not that he doesn't want it, but he just doesn't expect your feelings. He shakes his head.

– It won't end up well.

– It isn't supposed to end, Kaz! - his answer only makes you cry more, as you turn away from him, starting roaming around the room. Why should he always be like this? – Unless you want it to end, of course.

– And what do you want, huh?! - the anger slowly overflows him. – If everything stays like this, that will only give you another reason to hate me in the end, Y/N!

– What do I want? I want to spend my life with you, Brekker, every single moment of it, - you throw your hands up in displeasure. – But as I see, it's not mutual.

Kaz is still silent, and you only have to leave him be. You don't want to hurt him with your words, and knowing that, you'd better go away now.

When you go downstairs, you see Nina and Matthias, but don't even turn to her, calling you. You know, it's rude, but nothing matters now.

#shadow and bone fanfiction #shadow and bone fanfic #shadow and bone x reader #shadow and bone imagine #shadow and bone #shadow and bone x you #kaz brekker fanfiction #kaz brekker fanfic #kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker imagine #kaz brekker #kaz brekker x you #six of crows x you #six of crows x reader #six of crows imagine #six of crows

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readerxlit · 2 years

Text

Here's my disclaimer that I am Trans so the inability for me to word this post is stupidity not ignorance

Anyway the persona protagonists when their s/o comes out to them as a Trans person of the same gender as them (after formerly being presented as their assigned gender)

P3-p5 including femc

P3/Minato/Makoto

"Okay."

Doesn't really care what your gender is

That's not to say he doesn't care about how it affects you

He does care how you feel but as far as it changing your relationship? Doesn't matter. Your gender was irrelevant to how he felt about you

Pretty immediately and easily switches pronouns, and if you have a new name easily switches that

Basically will just be like "alright tell me what to change"

If you're only out to him and don't want others to know then he'll keep quiet about it pretty easily

Will likely find ways to avoid misgendering you as much as possible without outing you. Just subtly avoiding gendered words. Likely motioning to you instead of using your deadname if you have one

Because he so casual about it no one notices

Will be there for whatever you need, but doesn't really know what to do on his own- and is also Big Tired- so he won't go out of his way to do much without being asked

If you do want to come out to others in SEES he'll ask to be there with you for support and is honestly relieved to be able to refer to you correctly around them

More worried about if you're okay than anything else if someone makes a mistake, so you usually would be the one to correct them. (Unless Koro is around because his disappointment in them is tangible)

FeMC/Minako/Hamuko

Ah so now she has a cute girlfriend? Great 10/10

Your gender wasn't a huge factor to her before. It may have had some impact but not enough to change how she feels

She likely already knew she liked girls too so nothing to work through as far as that goes

She also switches pretty easily to new pronouns and name

She probably has a harder time continuing to use the wrong ones if you don't want others to know because her brain has already replaced all of that with the new stuff

On the bright side that means she almost never trips up when you're alone and usually realizes before even finishing the word when she does.

Though because she's usually so good about it she's a bit Too apologetic about it, but luckily you rarely need to remind her it's okay and that she can just correct herself and move on

Similarly to her counterpart she also tries to subtly avoid using gendered language and your deadname (if you have one) in conversation; instead motioning to you or giving you pet names since you're in a relationship and no one will question it

She's very supportive and will likely do whatever she can to make you more comfortable

Probably helps you find clothes that are neutral enough to feel less directly masculine so you can feel a little better in them without drawing unwanted attention

If you also come out to the rest of SEES she's your number one supporter and usually beats you to any corrections

P4/Yu

He is so supportive and so confused

That means you're boyfriends now right? Does he need to start calling you handsome instead of pretty? You can be both, but what if you don't want to be called pretty?

He's a little too ready to support you and asks a lot of questions, but if you tell him he's being overwhelming or making you uncomfortable he will stop immediately

As far as this making your relationship mlm? That's fine doesn't really think his s/o's gender matters as far as being in a relationship with them

He's probably worried about the others reaction more for your sake than his own. He can shut comments down pretty easily but he still worries

If you don't want anyone else to know? Okay he can do that. Is pretty good at instantly switching back and forth when you're alone or with other people.

He probably messes up sometimes when you're alone but he's pretty quick to realize and correct himself

Lends you clothes and if anyone asks it's just because he likes the idea of you wearing his shirts or jackets or whatever and people will go "okay yeah that's a thing" just fine

If you do come out to the investigation team he's so ready to support you and is always very quick on the draw to correct them without making a huge thing of it. It's kind of impressive how quickly he can go "he is, go on" or whatever

Absolutely does research on Trans stuff in his own time too because he cares A Lot and doesn't want to hurt you because of any ignorance he might have

If you haven't chosen a different name, but want one, don't tell him because he will make a list of like 80 names of extremely varying quality

Or do I guess; maybe one will stick

P5/Ren/Akira

Oh hell yeah we gay in this house

Legitimately didn't care about whether his s/o was a boy or girl (or neither or, ect., ect.) but since this is important he's very much like "oh nice I've got myself a boyfriend"

The switch of pronouns and name are pretty easy for him in general. He may mess up sometimes but he's good at catching it, correcting himself, and moving on

If you don't want others to know he finds plenty of ways to avoid language that genders you

Probably gives you a nickname unrelated to your deadname (if you have one) to call you when around the others. If anyone questions it he says it's just a pet name because you're in love or whatever

Probably already knows more than you expect about Trans stuff and is always willing to learn more

Supportive but doesn't really know what you want or need so waits until you mention something to try and help.

Will buy you clothes that are less feminine without warning. In general they're more neutral than masc, especially if you're only out to him, but he's doing his best

Also if you do want to come out to the other phantom thieves he's so ready to finally be able to go "my boyfriend" when talking about you

Honestly might refer to you too much when you're alone 1) to sort of train himself into using the right name and terms and 2) to be affirming

#minato arisato #minako arisato #hamuko arisato #makoto yuki #yu narukami #ren amamiya #akira kurusu #persona 3 #persona 4 #persona 5 #persona scenarios #headcanons #male reader #fem reader #ml writes #completed

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trikxx · 3 years

Text

𝐁𝐋𝐔𝐅𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐆

Chapter 1 of Bluffing Bakugou x reader series

"𝐞𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐛𝐥𝐮𝐟𝐟𝐢𝐧"

Chapter includes - cheating and swearing

ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

✰ "𝐈 𝐛𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐬 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐲𝐚 𝐜𝐚𝐫." You say singing along with the music. It had been a long day at work and yet you heard nothing from Katsuki. He was supposedly off today but you figured he was more than likely doing the the thing he does best on his off days.

Fuck a random girl in your shared house in your shared bed and try and be the victim when he's caught up. I honestly don't know why I'm still with him. Many of my friends have said "cut him off" "you deserve better" "dont let him bitch you". I just feel that there is a spark inside him that needs to be lit for the loyalty to come.

Me and Kat have been on and off since second year of high school. Him doing the same petty shit and me doing it back sometimes to get back at him. But in the end im always the bad guy. Is it love?

Hm, who cares. I still love him and i guess he loves me. At least a little bit...right? If he doesn't then it is what it is.

_____

Y/n pulled into the driveway and turned off the car to mentally prepare herself. "Lord give me strength... who is that?" Y/n says seeing a white audi i8 pull up in front of the house. She decided to stay in the car and watch what was happening.

A little prissy girl gets out the car and walks up to the door completely oblivious of me sitting in the driveway.(a/n: y/n's windows are tinted so the girl thought no one was in the car.) Bakugou opens the door and little kiss and he lets her in. He then realized y/n's car.

Y/n started her car back up tears threatening to fall out her eyes. She rolled down the passenger window to say something to Bakugou who was currently looking at y/n with and very snarky face. "FUCK YOU BAKUGOU!" Y/n yells. "If you keep thinking this is the way to do things then go ahead i'll just find someone who actually loves me." She finished and started to drive away until Bakugou said this. " OH SHUT UP! YOU'RE GONNA COME BACK ANYWAY!" After y/n heard this she put her car into park in the middle of the driveway and got out.

"Who do you think I am?" Y/n said walking up to Bakugou.

Our arguments have never gotten this heated before. Usually it was catch him and leave. Shit. I dont think I even know the meaning of home sweet home is.

"Who do I think you are? My bitch." Bakugou said smirking. Y/n slapped Bakugou hard then walk into the house to get most of her clothes. "Who are you?" The girl asked. "Don't worry about it. Worry about if your going to get off on my husband tonight." I said getting majority of my clothes and shoes. I grabbed all my make up and hair products. "Hey, Y/n stop." Bakugou said putting a hand on y/n's shoulder. "Don't touch me." Y/n said pulling away from Bakugou. To finish putting her stuff in her bags.

Y/n takes of her ring dropping it into Bakugou's hands.

"Bye. Don't contact me until you have....fixed your entire self."

_______

Italic is Gin

Regular is y/n

Hello... are you ok?

Yea im ok and im gonna just take the offer on moving in together.

What? FINALLY! We have to celebrate and look for houses. Come over. Also FUCK THAT POMERANIAN LOOKING ASS BITCH YOU ON YO HOT GIRL SHIT THATS IT!

Lol, im on my way tho.

Stop sulking dummy.

Ok ok.

Call me back when you get here.

Ok.

*call ended*

_____

I stop at the store to get some snacks and more gel for my hair then go to Gin's house. I park in The driveway, get my bag with clothes and hair stuff and the bags from the store then go and knock on the door. "Hey Bitchhhh!" Gin said grabbing some of the stuff from you "Hey Gin."I say then go to put the rest of my stuff in her room. Then we sit in the living room. "we about to get fucked up tonight. we staying here or are we going to the club?" Gin asked. "uhm...we can stay here lets run to binny's grab some shit and come back, look for places and get drunk. That way we don't have to worry about any dudes trying us tonight." "bet."

Me and Gin went to Binny's and grabbed most of our favorite drinks and came back to the house as we were pulling in the the driveway I saw a familiar figure standing at the door. "Girl I know thats not who I think it is" Gin said. "It might be but fuck him lets just go in the house." I say as I grab the bottles of wine we brought. We walked in through the garage. We tried to ignore the constant ringing of the door bell but it was getting irritating. "Hold on Gin." I said walking to the door. "What." "Look Y/n... Im sorry. Princess its my fault just come back so we can figure this out. Please." Bakugou pleaded.

"No." I say closing the door going back to looking for houses with Gin. "I need a shot after that." I said putting my head down. "Here." Gin says handing me a shot.

_____

"What about this one?" Gin asks. "Thats nice as hell! Look at everything. The kitchen is sexy. I think thats the one Gin." I say. "Alrighty I'll request to see it and we will see what they say.. now to get fucked up."

_____

Bakugou's POV*

Eh..there a first time for everything. Y/n has never hit me or got that angry before. I...I feel bad for ruining the relationship.

I sat in the bed thinking into space as Uraraka kissed down my neck. She sat on my lap and started grinding on me to create some friction. "Stop." I say in a blank voice. "Whats wrong? Dont tell me its about that bitch that was here earlier." Uraraka said looking in my eyes. "Get out." I say. "Why Kat? You left out to try and get sympathy from her and she wasn't having it. So be with me! I can make you ten times happier then that roach." She said. "I SAID GET THE FUCK OUT! AND DINT COME BACK!" I yell. "Good luck getting her back.."

I closed the door right after she walked out and went and laid down on the bed. "Why cant I forget now?" I questioned hugging the pillow y/n usually slept on. " theres no one better than y/n."

If there is no one better then why do you get with other women?

I dont know.

"FUCK." Bakugou yells throwing the pillow. "ITS ALL DEKU AND DEUNCE FACES FUCKING FAULT!"

Flash back- second year of high school

“Y/n!” Denki said. “Yes?” “Midoriya said he needed you by the first bench outside the back of the school.”Denki replied. “Oh. Ok.” Y/n says walking to the door to meet Midoriya. “Y/n!” Midoriya said whisper yelling. “Why the-“ “shhhh” Midoriya put his finger up to y/n’s mouth “look.” He said pointing. “Look wha...what the hell” I say when I see Bakugou sitting on a bench with Uraraka.

“Kattt all you have to do is leave her and we show pda” she said. “No.” Bakugou said getting up. “Why Bakugou? Fuck her obviously shes not doing anything for you.” Uraraka whined. “OI! Shut.The. Fuck. Up. Your talking to much. I dont want to hear your voice anymore.” Bakugou yelled walking away.

“Two can play at that motherfucking game. Midoriya come with me.” Y/n said “W-Wa-wait wait wait to where?” Midoriya asked. “Just come on!”

____

“Class 1b? Why are we here?” “Shut up Midoriya.”

Y/n: Hurry up.

*****: Ok ok here I come!!!

____

“Hey Y/n~” “Monama?!” Midoriya says. Midoriya goes back to class after that talk about what was going to happen. “Are you sure he won’t try and kill me.” Monama asked. “Is Monama scared of someone from class 1a?” Y/n sarcastically

“he won’t” she finished as they continued to walk hand in hand.

“Y/N!” Bakugou yelled. “Welp here we go... WHAT.” Y/n replied. “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING WITH HIM?!” “We are just walking.” “WALKING?! YOU ARE HOLDING HANDS TO SO THERES MORE TO IT!” “Stop yelling.” “NO! WHY ARE YOU HOLDING HANDS WITH THIS NERD?!” “Why were you kissing and feeling on a whole different girl and Im your fucking girlfriend.... thats what i fucking thought.”

“Bye.”

“Y/n wait.... Just think about us.”

End of flash back

“Why do I do this to Y/n. Fuck it. She’ll be back.” Or so he thought.

#mha angst #mha x reader #mha bakugo x reader #katsuki bakugo x reader #bakugou katsuki #bnha bakugou #bakugo angst #cheating #lord what have i done💀

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agentsoftie · 4 years

Text

Sleepless Nights ( S.R ) p.2

summary: Y/N and Reid aren’t the most fond of each other. So what happens when sleep, have to share a bed, and get married?

pairing: Y/N x Spencer Reid

a/n: a/n: AHH okay so here it is! It’s my first au so it’s probably not the best. But big thanks to @anepiphany! Ani baby none of this would be happening without you! Thank you for you tips and making me not go insane! Also pls tell me if I slept something wrong cuz like, your girl not the best when it comes to it. Also there will def be a loophole somewhere in my case and if you find one, just let it slide because life is filled with loopholes ❤️ also this is gonna be a two parter! ( this is the second part )

warnings: mentions of a case, angst and blood (the smallest amount), fluff really though

also if you want to be in my permanent taglist, just tell me and I’ll add you!

Remember to like and reblog

“So today happened,” you say while you got into bed.

Yeah, today happened. So, I guess we're gonna do this thing huh,”

Wait, is he asking me out? you think to yourself. No dumbass of course he isn't. He's talking about the event thing. you say to yourself mentally. “Yeah, I guess so.”

“So, sleep huh.” He asked awkwardly.

“What?”

“You know, sleep. Like us, together. No, wait t-that came out wrong. I meant like we’re gonna sleep, but ike together on the same bed. But if you're not tired then we-” He got cut off by you when you grabbed his arm. Immediately he looked down at your hand and then up. He looked like he had just seen a ghost and gotten an A in a class you were failing at, at the same time.

“Breathe, just breathe. How ‘bout you take a shower huh.” You say in an airy voice while still holding onto his arm.

“Uh, okay. Yeah, a shower. That sounds good.” He said, forcing you to let go of his hand.

-------

It takes him 10 minutes to finish taking his shower. Tonight he comes out wearing another pair of basketball shorts and another tee. It really makes you wonder if all he goes to sleep in is a pair of shorts and a tee. Like really Reid come on. You have money, use it on some proper pj’s. Although you're one to argue wearing another pair of shorts and a loose crop top.

“You said last night that there was no hot water so it took you ten minutes, well this time there still was and it again still (italicize) took you ten minutes. Like what the fuck!”

“I'm not really one for hot water. But my statement last night still remains true, you took up the hot water.”

“ Reid, this is a hotel. They almost always have hot water running.”

“Okay well, I don’t care!”

“I thought you were supposed to be the smart one.”

“Ha, so you admit it!”

“Admit what?”

“That I’m smarter than you!”

“Well in certain areas, yes,” you said in an annoyed tone. He was smirking at your struggle for answering. “Ugh, can we just go to sleep.” You say not wanting to continue this conversation.

--------

You woke up to the sound of rain pouring outside. The skies were as gray as a child on a monday. You felt something on your stomach and to your surprise that feeling was a man known as Dr. Spencer freaking Reid. He was laying on you with his head right under your chin. You were holding his hand and your legs were intertwined with his again. You can't remember what happened last night to lead up to this, but what's done is done. The person you've been pining over for the last 3 years was here laying on you and looking like a fucking god.

Your phone started to ring causing him to wake up.

“Emily? Oh, okay yeah, I'll be there in 20.” She told you to go to the address that she had sent you. Saying to bring Reid with you to get your outfits for tonight. “Reid, come on we gotta go.” You say looking down at the art that was placed in front of you.

“No, I don't wanna leave. I just wanna sleep.” You had never seen this side to him before. So soft and sweet. Was the universe trying to make you fall for him? If so, then it was working.

“No come on, we have to get our outfits for tonight. We have to get ready and eat something. So come on, get up.” you say trying to get up but failing because he holds you back.

“No. sleep.” He mumbles half awake.

“Spencer, how ‘bout this. How about you sleep for a little until I take a shower and stuff. Then you can get up.”

“Okay, fine.” And with that he was out, leaving you go gaze over the literal form of perfection.

------

“Y/L/N how long does it take to get changed?” Reid yelled.

“Oh will you shush!”

“Geez, no need to get so mean.”

“Iswear I will backhand you so hard if you don't shut up!” You say while walking out. And at the sight of seeing you he was speechless. Staring at you like you had something stuck in your teeth. “What?” You say looking down at your black floor length gown.

“No n-nothing. It's just-”

“Just what?”

“You look good in that dress.”

You looked down immediately after he said that fearing he would see the blush. He did. “Yeah well, you look good too.” you say while moving your hands after the redness was gone.

“I know.” He said, smirking causing you to make a sarcastic face.

“Okay, well we have to go now or Hotch will literally kill us.”

“You. He’ll kill you.” He says while walking out of the door.

“And you would just love that, wouldn't you.” You say following him out.

————

“Reid, you have your gun?”Hotch askes.

“Yes.” He said.

“Wait, where should I put mine?” You ask while holding your gun.

“Oh, you see, you're not going to have one.” JJ says while taking your gun away slowly.

“Then what the hell am i going to use as self defence?”

“You're a badass, you'll figure it out.” Emily says suggestively.

“Damn straight.” You say smiling causing her and JJ to laugh. Reid was not impressed.

“Okay, these glasses have a secret video camera in them sending footage to Garcia once you turn it on. So whatever you do, don't take these off.” Hotch says while handing Reid a pair of glasses that match his suit. “And Y/L/N this is your “wedding ring.” It has a video camera in the diamond so try to keep your hand up and try to make it as visible to people as possible.” He says while handing you the ring.

“Okay you're married, so act like it!” Rossi says before you two leave.

“Yeah, you both better be so in love it makes someone sick.” Emily adds.

“Yes mom. Yes dad.” You say jokingly.

“Okay and before you go, here are your earpieces. And we’ll be near the building if anything happens.” JJ says.

-------

“Y/N, put your left hand on Spencer’s arm.” Garcia says through the earpiece. And you did exactly that. “Okay, now be affectionate.”

“Pen how should we do that.” You say while looking at Reid so it looked like you were talking to someone.

“I don't know? Spencer, kiss her.”

And then bam! Before you knew it, his lips were on yours. You didn't know how to react. He wrapped his arms around your waist pulling you in making the kiss even stronger. You then put your hands in his hair and pulled at it a little. And at that moment it was as if the world stopped. As if time froze and fireworks went off. And then all of a sudden he pulled away and you looked down.

“Cherry or Strawberry?” He asks as if nothing just happened.

“I uh- strawberry.”

“Pardon me, but I couldn't help but notice that beautiful ring.” Says a guy approaching you.

“Oh thank you! It's very gorgeous isn't it!”You say while looking down at the ring then bringing your hand up.

“But not as gorgeous as you honey.” Reid says while looking at you. Oh god the things he did to your heart.

“Oh, uh how rude of me not to introduce myself. Im Ryan. Ryan Carson.” He says while holding out his hand for both of you to shake.

“Im Y/N Reid and this is my husband Spencer Reid.” You say while shaking his hand after Reid, as always, refused to. Y/N Reid had a nice ring to it, although you would never change your last name. But it sure had a nice ring to it which both you and Reid noticed.

“How long?” Ryan asked.

“3 months.”I said.

“When did you know?”

“The first time she read me The Fault In Our Stars. It was 2 something in the morning and I couldn't sleep so she read it to me. And I just couldn't stop thinking that this is the girl I’m gonna marry.” Reid said. Although that of course never happened, your heart wanted to explode. Right after he said that you kissed him on the cheek. He immediately turned red, but you didn't say anything.

“Wow. That’s just, wow.” Ryan said.

“Guys I think this guy is our friend Thomas. Well not think, know. He looks exactly the same. So make sure to play into his tactics or whatever. Therapy must cost a lot for you sweet children.” Garcia says.

“You know, I’m gonna propose to my girlfriend soon. Would you two help me pick out a ring?”

“What do you think Spenny?” You ask in a joking tone. Spenny, that was one you never used. You liked it, did so did he.

“Well, I think that it’s an amazing idea baby.”

You could see the anger in his eyes. The anger you get before taking a life. You could see that all he wanted to do was end your lives right then and there. Honestly you two could go into acting if all this death gets too heavy for you.

“Great! Then follow me right this way.” He says while leading you to the elevator. The ride was fairly quick but the entire time Reid had his and around your waist pulling you close to him. Oh god the things you would do to have him.

“Here’s my room.” he says while gesturing to you two to go in first. You saw two chairs and then heard the door slam behind you. You jumped at the sound and turned around to see him standing there with a gun pointing that both of you. “You don't want your wife to die a painful death, go sit down on the chair.” And he did exactly that. “Now you too bitch.” he says while pointing the gun at you. And you did exactly what he said.

“What do you want!” You yell at him while he ties you up.

“I want your happiness to end. If I can't have it, then how can you?”

“The world doesn't revolve around you!” And then before you knew it there was blood coming from your arm and a door kicked open.

“Y/N!” Spencer yells.

-------

“I’m okay, really I’m fine.” You say to the paramedic wrapping your arm.

“No you’re not! You got shot!” Spencer says.

“Okay well how about I leave you two along for a bit huh.” And with that the paramedic was gone.

“Oh look, you scared the paramedic.” You say while throwing your hands in the air.

“Okay and you scared me.”

“Spencer, I got shot. It happens.”

“Yes Y/N I know but it could have hit an artery and make you bleed out. I could have lost you. Why dont see that. If you die who am I gonna mentaly torture, who am I gonna talk to my mom about, who am I gonna love? I've already lost so much, I can't lose you too. I love you.”

“You love me?”

And just like that he grabbed you and put his lips on yours. You immediately put your hands in his hair and pulled hard, he didn't care though. He pulled you closer to him, making you come back with 10 times more force than before. You pulled apart due to lack of oxygen and he put his head against yours after catching his breath.

“Does that answer your question?” He says softly.

This time you kiss him. Not as aggressive as last time though. This was a small, yet equally as meaningful kiss. “I love you too.”

“I fell in love the way you fall asleep; slowly then all at once” – John Green

————

taglist: @ghostly-angelic, @marshmallowtraver, @heartbroken-writer, @yllwtaxi, @yeah-just-ignore-me-thanks, @theamuz, @guessthatswhyiliveinhell, @alli1902, and @kaybeeboop

#criminal minds #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x y/n #reader x spencer reid #spencer reid #thanks to ani though #none of this would be happening without her #so thank you ani baby 🥺💕#mira writes

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xeo-kunsatan · 3 years

Text

Beast Choices Chapter 4. Shine of 2

The story of this young couple continue in a normal way, the love between eachother was getting stronger.

In a Friday Day.

Betrayus have arrived in a jewelry

Cashier: Welcome to Bright shop, something special you're looking for?

Betrayus: Well... I was looking for a ring my girlfriend, an special one for her

Cashier: So you're looking for a wedding ring for your girl? Anyone in specific?.

Betrayus: Do you have sapphire rings?

Cashier: Ohohoh, Interesting asking, may I ask why did you choosed that jewel?

Betrayus: Well, I choosed a sapphire for her because,.. our relationship at evolving through the time, we always were honest and have confidence between eachother, all my improvement as person is thanks to her as I helped her as well to make her get up, for it and even more things impossible to tell all of them.. My Girl is special for me.

Cashier: So poetic~ *Shows him some sapphire rings* Heh..*Jokes* some people considers sapphire rings as "Princesses rings".

Betrayus: Believe me..She.. is better than a silly and boring princess, she is wild, rude, seductive and sometimes funny, my favorite type of partner in general.

Cashier: Any team is valid, you know so well bro.

Betrayus: yeah, and for it.. I choose this one.

Betrayus have choosed a sapphire ring with a unique design, it was perfect for Muriel

Cashier: Excellent election.

Betrayus after pay for the ring, have left the jewelry to his job with the box of the ring for his girlfriend, keeping it hide to later surprise her in their Movies Friday night.

Pacopolis 9:38 pm

Betrayus and Muriel have arrived home after finished their usual works

Betrayus: Ughhh.. I'm tired..*Falls in the coach*

Muriel:*arrives with her phone* You were, you know what day is?

Betrayus: Oh yeah!

B&M: Bitch it's Friday!

Muriel: Prepare the Movie!

Betrayus: Order a Pizza!

B&M: Yeah!!

Muriel have ordered the pizza while Betrayus was looking for the Cd of the Friday 13th movies.

Some minutes later the Pizza have arrived and Betrayus received the pizza while Muriel taked the beer to the table

Betrayus; It's Here!

Muriel: Oh Yeah!!

They started they typical Friday night to watch scary movies with Pizza, Betrayus was about to propose himself but the moment was interrupted by a call from Betrayus's phone.

Betrayus: Aghh it's my brother

Muriel:*pauses the movie* what did he want Sunlight?

Betrayus: I dunno..*attends the call* what do you want stinky lemon?

Stratos: *in the call* Don't call me like that!.. uhum I mean.. Santana invited us to visit The Vegas, I was wondering... If you and Muriel would like to come with us?

Betrayus: Do you seriously think i want to go there, with you and mother!?... Yes

Stratos: So, you will come?

Betrayus: Hell yeah!! Let me tell my girlfriend about this *Ends the call*.

Muriel: What happened?

Betrayus: *sighs* Fluffyplum, my brother told me that my sister invited me to go with basically all the Spheros family to travel to the Vegas, I was wondering if would you like to come with me?..

Muriel: Go with you and your family to the city of lights, having to bear with your awful brother and Mother? Are you kidding me?

Betrayus: Uhhh...

Muriel: Hell yeah, I'm fucking ready!

Betrayus: Yeah girl!, But first, It's movie time! *Plays the movie*

They continued their movie night cuddling eachother while they were eating their pizza.

The next day, both where packing up their stuff getting ready for the travel, Betrayus had hided the box, his plans to propose marriage to Muriel instead of get ruined they had taked a plot twist.

Muriel: Wait... Who would take care of Yuū while we are out?

Yuū: Hmmm?

Betrayus: Sir Cumference

Muriel: A.

Betrayus: Just Kidding, we will take her with us, there's a place for pets in the hotel we will be.

Muriel: What a relief~..

After packing up they left to the airport where they meet up with Rotunda, Santana and Stratos.

Betrayus: Hello Family, we are here

Muriel: Sup

Santana: Betrayus! Little Brother how are you? *Notices Muriel* Oh! You most be my brother's girlfriend?

Betrayus: Yes, Mury, This is my older sister Santana, Santana this is my partner Muriel.

Santana: It's nice to meet you Muriel.

Muriel: it's nice to meet you too

Stratos: H-Hi Betrayus..Muriel

Rotunda: *Sighs* you really had to bring your bitch and her mutt here?..

Yuū: Grrrrrr...

Muriel: No Yuū..

Spheros Siblings: Mother!!!

Betrayus: It doesn't have anything wrong at bringing my girlfriend to the travel, I don't wanted leave her alone in the department.

Santana: C'mon Mom is not a bad Idea having my sister in law with us.

Rotunda: Aghh whatever...

Muriel:*sighs*

The Spheros Family & Muriel Taked a plane to the Vegas, Where Santana had some nice conversations with Muriel and Betrayus.

The PacVegas city

2:27 pm

At arriving in the city, they taked a Taxi to the hotel where they would stay.

Muriel and Betrayus where impressed about the city.

Muriel; I can't wait to take a ride around this Wholesome city!..

Betrayus; Me too! Hey Santy, would you like to come with us?

Muriel: Yeah girl come with us

Santana: Of course!

Stratos: Are you sure Santy?

Santana: Yeah, i have long time without getting along with my Tray Tray, and more now with my new sister in law.

Stratos:*sighs* Alright you can go while i take My mom to her reunion.

Rotunda:*Arrives* Let's go Stratos

Stratos: I'll go Mom.

Betrayus, Santana and Muriel had a long ride exploring and shopping in the city.

The PacVegas City

7:14 pm

The Spheros Family was resting in the hotel yard, Santana came in.

Santana: i was wondering to go to Cube Casino to you know have fun, would you like to come?

B&M: Yeah girl!

Stratos: Sounds Great

Rotunda: do whatever you want, I will be in the spa, I'm really tired

Rotunda leaves to the Hotel Spa.

Santana: Alright, *Grabs Muriel* we will see you in the door.

Muriel: Heheh see ya

Santana grabbed Muriel away taking her to her room. She was changing in elegant clothing as well Muriel which was also holding a tiny box with a nervous expression in her face.

Santana: Is there something wrong?

Muriel: it's something personal.. and a surprise.

Santana: what kind of surprise?

Muriel: *Jokes* I don't know if should tell you, you can get mad~

Santana: Aww c'mon, I am your sister in law, how could I be mad with you?

Muriel: okay you convinced me, *Shows her a Ruby ring from the box*

Santana: *Gasp* Oh my gosh.. you really?

Muriel: Yes

Santana: YEEEE!! *Hugs her* you will marry my brother!?

Muriel: we have 5 years together, I think it's time to go to the next step in our relationship.

Santana: This is so Exciting!.... Seriously Muriel, I want to thank you.

Muriel: For what?

Santana: For what you did for my younger brother... As you maybe know my mother and Stratos were always unfair with him for something is not his fault something i never liked it but... i didn't had enough time to give him the attention he deserved because i's always being focused *sob* in my own studies and work to help up my family but i honestly wasn't enjoyed it... I wanted to travel around the world and maybe try out my luck working in other country.. *In tears* but i can't left Betrayus behind because I was so worried of him.. and I'm still worrying for him.. it's a relief for me that my brother finally found out someone who cares a lot of him as I didn't do it.. specially someone like you.

Muriel: *dries up her tears* it's okay Santana, I understand and feel your pain.. *Hugs Her*

Santana: *Sniff* If you will Marry my brother Muriel,..will you promise me to take care of Betrayus?

Muriel: Always, I promise.

Santana: Thank you very much Muriel, all I want is see my brother smile.

Muriel: Me too Santana, you know girl I don't have a wedding godmother not even a friend for it, will you be our Wedding godmother?

Santana: Really!? That's a big honor...Count with me!.. and tell me why did you choosed a Ruby for my brother

Muriel: Because it represents the pasion he finally released, the pure love i felt for him, and also Rubies are considered as sun jewels and Betrayus Is a Sunlight.

Santana: that's so deep~

After the conversation the 4 had meet up in the Hotel Door

Betrayus: Wow girls you both look so good, and *blushed* you Muriel.

Santana: Aww thank you

Muriel: You too Betrayus *Blushed*

Stratos: Don't think your dress is somewhat provocative?

Betrayus: Don't think that you most shut the fuck up Stratos? She can dress as she wants and likes.

Santana: Yeah Stratos, what the hell?

Stratos: O-oh.. Sorry.

Santana: Well guys forget this and let's fucking go!

B&M: Oh Yeah!!

Santana taked them to a Casino where they had fun Gambling, with Betrayus defeating his enemies with a psycho attitude.

Stratos: I Thought you fixed him!

Muriel: Let him be Stratos, Let him Be.

Santana: The Karaoke just opened who wants to rock out?

Betrayus:*have heard after winning a Gamble* I do!,.. Muriel will you make a Duo with me

Muriel: Of Course, I was about to ask you the same~

Both had walked to the scenery.

Betrayus: Uhum..Hello.. We are going to sing "Not Gonna get us" I hope you liked it

Betrayus and Muriel sang together in the Karaoke expressing how much their relationship had evolved, at finishing their song Betrayus was ready to confess his surprise.

Betrayus: Thank you everyone, this means a lot for me.. because this woman next to me have teached me how to appreciate myself, this woman was the first In hear me when I was fucked,.. this wild woman was the one who opened her arms for me, a real friend I never had, She is the woman I want to spend all my life..

Betrayus gets in his knees in front Muriel opening the Box revealing the sapphire ring he choosed for her.

Betrayus: Muriel Plizetxki... Will you marry me?

Muriel: Betrayus... I..I Literally wanted to ask you the same *Shows him the Ruby ring from her box*

Betrayus: That means Is a yes for eachother?

Muriel: Yeah!

Both Kissed while the crowd in the Casino next to Santana and Stratos clapped.

Their put eachother in their rings and continued the gambling party where both ended in not saint things.. coff coff alcohol... Coff coff shots coff coff.

Muriel: *Wakes up* Hmm~ my head

Betrayus:*wakes next to her* Morning Mury~ ... Ouch.. fuck my head hurts..

Muriel:Eh?...how the heck a horse entered in the room!!??

Horse: Hi

B&M: Holy Shit!!

Haha to be continued

What would happen in the next chapter?

Haha sorry for taking so long In post this but I can get blocked hehe sorry XD, I hope you loved this chapter!

#pacman and the ghostly adventures #pmatga

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thejosh1980 · 3 years

Text

Don't you know that you're toxic?

I was in a toxic relationship...

In fact I have been in a few... But the last one is the one I can still remember in some detail...

The first few, well they were immature drunk and disorderly scenarios. They are not important in this story, other than you should be aware I was pretty repetitive towards my approach to relationships back then.

The story I would like tell is about the 7 year old relationship that ended in March 2019.

This particular relationship had the biggest effect on me, my well being, and my happiness. And even though I married an amazing woman earlier this year, that last relationship is still a reminder of the baggage I have held onto since my first relationship.

It's time I unloaded that baggage and shed my skin.... Even if it's just a little bit... You know, small steps...

So, lets call my ex “Grumpy”...

In fact that's a name an American girlfriend of a drummer of a band we were watching called her once in Germany, literally minutes after meeting her. I should have seen that red flag even back then...

Look, Grumpy isn't a bad person, deep down I think she means well... But she just hasn't been able to get past her past... She wont let go of any stubborn insecurities, learn new coping mechanisms, and she wont forgive herself, or you for that matter... At least that's what I've experienced with her.

It's like whenever things don't go her way, whenever she's frustrated or doesn't know how to cope, she'd revert back to a 14 year old girl, which is when she had troubles with her Mum.

I mean honestly, who didn't have troubled teenage years??

I'm not saying she doesn't have a right to feel pain about some significant event or trauma, but she surely can't hold it over my head and expect me to hang around, forever...

During our relationship, I explained to her, that when I went into therapy (which at the beginning she thankfully helped me do) I had no idea what to expect. But I knew I couldn't continue the way I was and expect a happy outcome.

It took a long time, but I processed many of the issues and events of my past, which in turn helped my current situation and had a positive effect on my future. I learned new ways on how to cope with current problems, insecurities and learn to take responsibility for my actions and choices in life...

I forgave my Dad for not being a good father. I understand, he just didn't know better and chose not to learn how later in life... It's no excuse but I find some comfort in knowing I wasn't the problem. These days, I can be comfortable in his presence, no longer hoping for the Dad I've always needed, but enjoy his company for what it is...

I forgave my sister for her misgivings. She's a tough cookie, and very jealous of me. I think she's very jealous of my relationship with Mum, but my sister hasn't taken responsibility for her actions, and therefore it will be a long road before I can trust her, but I'm totally OK with that. She has her problems, and they are not mine to take responsibility for, anymore.

My grandparents on both sides were hard work over the years. I thought it was my fault too! But really it was their lack of empathy and understanding that created an atmosphere of negativity. They had every opportunity to be a good example to an impressionable young me. Luckily I learned to forgive them, even if I didn't actually say that to them while they were still alive. I forgave them and myself for contributing to the escalation, rather than finding resolution.

Grumpy knew I did this (and more) in therapy, and refused to consider it.

Now in all fairness, I originally refused to entertain the idea of counseling too, as I had a negative experience in my younger days (just like Grumpy), but when I reached my first breakdown around 2014 in a foreign country, I knew I needed help and I asked...

You know, I know she's still hurting over her past...

How can I tell?

Because it's been 18 months since I broke up with her, and she continues to create drama, instead of “adulting” and talking to me about it.

She's had every opportunity to deal with these post break up problems we all have had to go through like an adult (you know, splitting up the household belongings etc), without fail each time she has deflected, ignored, created more drama, lied or done something else that shows me, she has not recognized her part in our story.

Let's face it, it takes 2 to tango...

I've come to realize she treated me the way she did during our relationship, because she took me for granted. She thought I'd never have the courage or strength to actually leave her. I sure proved her wrong, didn't I!!!

We started our relationship drunk, and continued like that for 2 or so years. Grumpy and I could drink a lot, and did... We both were a bit rounder then too! We were never fully honest with each other or ourselves. I would say, we probably should have just been a short term fling, because we both weren't ready for long term, but we dived in anyhow...

That journey got me here, and that's totally fine. I have no regrets...

In case you didn't know, I wasn't a very strong person back then. I had little self esteem, and little self worth. So it was easy for both of us to “beat on” each other verbally and not resolve any issues. That's easy to do when someone just can't listen without demeaning you, without taking your feelings and smashing them against the wall... I was always ALWAYS in trouble. She was too sometimes back then... We both were in trouble...

As time went on with my therapy I processed a lot of things, and became ready for long term... I also knew I wanted to move back home, down under, eventually. That would be a hard decision, with or without Grumpy. I just couldn't imagine piling on more stress on top of stress with that relationship. I came to realize there was no future there unless something changed. We had to listen to each other, we had to trust each other, we had to respect each other.

I know I am not perfect, but surely if I can forgive her for things, she could step my way a little... Couldn't she? Didn't she have the power to learn to forgive? I mean really forgive someone and love them for all their faults? Didn't she have the power to grow? Unfortunately she didn't... I knew she didn't process anything because she was bringing up stuff from 2 or 3 or 6 years ago...

When I sobered up and seriously got into therapy, I had no idea what road it would take me down... But after talking about all my family issues, social anxiety issues and depression, the last thing was Grumpy. It took almost 5 years to get to the point where I acknowledged I was unhappy, I realized I didn't trust her and I couldn't see a future with her...

I just couldn't talk to her anymore. We just didn't trust each other anymore... That's the point...

The day we broke up, I had written her a letter, and I read her this letter. I read out a letter I had spent weeks writing making sure my adult words were being used (because without the letter I knew I'd revert to something less mature and less communicative). I clearly stated after trying many times, trying for years to correct our problems, I had come to realize we couldn't go forward. I decided we would break up to save each other from unnecessary pain. I couldn't see any steps going in the right direction in our relationship anymore...

I loved her, but it just wasn't working out, and didn't show any signs of improving.

Her first words were “I knew it” with tears rolling down her face...

I didn't want to do it, but I made a choice... Based on the past, for the present, to better my future.

Honestly I don't know if she wanted to recognize any of those times I tried to talk to her. She didn't want to see the signs. When she got frustrated and yelled at me, and I sat quietly listened and did my best not to raise my voice back. When I tried to talk sense to her she'd react like I was talking crazy.

Maybe she was scared? After all, change is a scary thing.

I changed a lot in those years since I started therapy and stopped drinking, always hoping Grumpy would come my way a little... For several years I was a huge contributing factor to our fights, but as time went on and I learned and grew, I started to de-escalate those fights. (Which generally made things worse!).

Apparently she didn't get the memo...

And she continues to blame me for that mistrust, because that's the way it goes when you don't take responsibility for your actions... It's always someone else's fault... The world owes me...

Even though she's been in a committed relationship since the beginning of 2020, she still hasn't let go of any anger, hurt, or resentment towards me. Her actions clearly show she hasn't processed our relationship, start, middle, or end, and would prefer to block me or stop all communication with me, before dealing with herself. She'd prefer to tell everyone else how bad I was, what I owed her, what I did to her, than think about her actions and how they affected our relationship.

It's like history repeating itself... And I am finding freedom in the fact I am no longer a character in her story.

I'm quite sure she'll keep the narrative within her circle of friends to make her look good, and me bad. But I like my narrative more (who wouldn't?), I feel we both were a mess... We were having a negative affect on each other. How or why, isn't as important as learning that communication, trust, forgiveness and respect are the things that were missing...

In fact, I think she dislikes anyone who has shown personal growth... It scares her... I think she's comfortable in her denial... She blames her Mum or her grandma... She blames me... Not once had I ever heard in all her years of coming home from work, “Oh it was me...”, “I did something wrong...” or “I messed up, I better say sorry...”

So how could I stay with someone who didn't take any responsibility?? How can I love someone who doesn't say “sorry”?

I was heart broken during the time leading up to reading Grumpy that letter...

I went back and forth in my head, could I see a future??? But in the end I couldn't... The one thing I realize, that is so important in my relationships, is good ol' communication. We lost that, when we lost the trust... It all turned toxic... Manipulative.... Twisted...

I wish her all the happiness the world throws at her.

We all deserve happiness... But Grumpy, sometimes you gotta work at it...

I could spend my time blaming her for so much of it but in the end, it was down to me. I am the one master of my fate... Just as she is... Then and now...

Thanks for reading,

Josh

#toxic relationship #break up #ex girlfriend #moving on

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bmongmong · 3 years

Text

Chapter 10 - Change

Blue pill or red pill - Jungkook

Description: You're a young girl, who's a little bit introverted and afraid to be under everybody's eyes. You only have your best friend, but it's ok for you. You don't want to be popular and believe in minimal things. One day you meet a guy. Or two?

Jungkook x Reader

The imagines I used are not mine Credit to the owners

Jungkook's pov

It's been a few days now and I haven't seen y/n since the date night. I'm not mad at her. After all it's not the first time that my brother steals a girl from me. It actually happens all the time.

But this one was different. She made me feel some type of emotions, that I didn't even think they could exist.

That hurt me a lot. If she only would have told me.

Even now, I'm willing to listen to her. But I don't think I will believe her. It's not believing in her or no. I guess it's something else. But I don't know how to describe it.

It's really sad these days since y/n doesn't come to school and Rosé told me that she doesn't answer her text messages. She's planning on visiting her one of these days, without telling her. I think for now, is better this way. I think, it' would be too awkward if the two of us meet right away. We both need some time.

Honestly, I don't think I can face her.

Also my brother, Jungwook, seems different. Usually after stealing my girl, he would tease me for forever. But after that morning in class, when Rosé was that angry, he didn't do anything to me.

Perhaps because I don't leave my room when I'm at home and when I'm in class I'm always by myself in a corner, like the beginning of school.

I think Jungwook noticed that this time it was different, for every single one of us. In the past I've never really had feelings towards those girls. But this time I really fell in love with y/n. That's why it hurts more than ever.

I'm in my room now, and as I keep thinking about my life, I hear a knock on the door.

"Come in" I say.

I see Jungwook entering the room.

"You don't have to knock on the door. It's also your room" I say, now looking at the book I'm holding. I didn't even realize that for all this time I was reading a book, while thinking about all that mess.

"I prepared a sandwich. Here" my brother says putting that thing on my desk. And leaves right after, closing the door silently.

"What's wrong with him?" I question myself. He's strange. He's never done stuff for me. He also has never talked to me, if not for school stuff.

I slowly took the sandwich he made for me and look at what's inside, to see if he may poisoned it or not. It looks like a regular one, with a bit of salad, tuna and mayonnaise. I'm a bit hesitant at first, but eventually end up giving a big bite on it. it's actually good!

I smile a bit at my brother little present. I know it's only a sandwich, but it's actually the first gift I've ever received from him.

We don't hate each other. We just disagree with everything.

Another day has passed and now it's Thursday morning.

Y/n didn't show up at school today. Again. I think she won't come until next week at this point.

Now we're waiting for the teacher to come inside the classroom, but I start to feel a bit hot. I try to make some wind with my hands in front of my face, but I keep sweating. I suddenly choke on my spit and start coughing hard.

"Here" I hear Jungwook voice. I turn to face him and he's handing me a bottle of water. I quickly grab it and start drinking right away, to make myself calm down and be able to breath properly.

"T-Thanks..." I say surprised by his actions and hands the bottle back to him.

"you can keep it" he says, now looking at his notebook.

Everyone is looking at me and Jungwook shocked. My jaw drops. What? It's the first time ever he talked to me in front of our classmates. I guess everyone else is surprised about this, as I see their widened eyes and mouths opened.

I try not to think too much about this and keep doing the lesson.

As the class ends I feel someone calling my name:

"Jungkook, I didn't understand this part of the lesson. Can you explain it to me real quick?" it's Jungwook again. he doesn't look at me. His eyes are focused on his notes, in particular on a specific line at which he's pointing is finger at. I nod, but before explaining it to me, I look up worried, to see everyone looking at us again.

What's happening to him? Since when did he start studying?

Before leaving the classroom, I grip on Jimin's arm, hinting him that I needed to talk to him.

"Do you perhaps know what happened to my brother?" I ask a bit unsure of his possible answer.

"I honestly don't know Jungkook. Both me and Rosé were so shocked, when we saw his behavior today. I don't really know what got into him. But I guess it's better now, that he gives you some respect" he says patting my shoulder and leaves with his girlfriend.

Now I'm in my room, reviewing today's lesson, when...

"Jungkook!" I hear my brother screaming from downstairs "Come here please". Please? Did he really say 'please'? What is happening again.

As I make my way on the steps I see him on the couch, holding a pen and looking at a book, which is laying on his knees.

"Oh you're here!" he says enthusiastic "Come fast"

I quickly run to him and see him trying to solve a problem. As I look at the description, I notice that it's the homework that our professor gave to us. He's really doing homework?

"Did you hit your head or something?" I ask him confused.

"If you don't want to help me, you can go" he says to me. I slowly sit next to him and start explaining everything.

Once I'm done with my explanation, I hear him saying:

"Thanks brother" and going upstairs in our room. He's really strange. Not that I don't like this, but I think that there's some reason behind his behavior.

In a blink of an eye, it's Friday morning. I'm changing into my clothes and getting ready to go to school. After preparing all my stuff, I go downstairs to eat breakfast and I find Jungwook eating.

"I prepared some pancakes for both of us. Want some?" he asks me. I'm a bit hesitant but eventually end up sitting in front of him and trying the dish he prepared.

"It's really good!" I say widening my eyes and looking at him. And at that moment I freeze.

Is he really smiling at me? I mean, he smiled even before, but this time it's not one of his evil smiles or grins. I'm literally speechless. Did I really do something to him? I don't know if to be happy of afraid.

"Good, now I'll change into my clothes. I'll meet you at school" and with that he goes into his room.

I'm literally shocked.

Now I'm in class. It has already passed an hour and y/n hasn't shown up yet. This makes me feel sad a bit.

"Jungkook" I hear Rosé calling my name, so I turn to face her "I forgot to tell you that yesterday I went to y/n's house, to check on her" I can feel my eyes lighting up as I hear that name.

"How is she?" I ask a bit concerned.

"She seemed ok. She was wearing very baggy clothes. She said it was because she wanted to be comfortable around the house. But from her face I could notice that she lost a bit of weight. A part from, that she seemed fine"

I'm a bit revealed to hear that actually. I mean, after all I still love her. This feeling won't go away, but on the other hand I don't want to go back to her after knowing that she kissed my brother. Everybody says that it was Jungwook who first kissed her, but my brother didn't say so. After all there were only him and y/n at that moment, so anybody doesn't really know how things went. Except for Jungwook and y/n.

Who should I trust? My brother? The one who made my youth like hell? Or Y/n? the one who stole my heart and right after broke it, lying to me?

As I think about these questions, I notice that the professor is testing my brother on the problem I explained him yesterday. I don't know why, but I want him to get a good mark. As he writes on the white board, it seems that he got my explanation and that he understood the problem.

"Great Jungwook! Now you can go to you seat" says the professor after a while.

All eyes are glued on Jungwook, as he walks towards his chair and sits. I also look at him and I see him forming a kiss with his lips and looking at me.

What was that? Everybody are now looking at me, and I'm blushing really hard. Like what the hell? Am I really blushing because my brother just sent me a flying kiss? What is happening really.

Now I'm in my room, with my brother. I'm at my desk studying and he's laying down on his bed, watching some videos with his phone. I don't know why, but I really like this sensation. The fact that we're both in the same room and I don't have to be nervous.

"AHAHAHHAHAHHAH" I hear him laughing hard "JUNGKOOK COME HERE AHAHAHAH"

I turn around and see him holding his belly and crying with laughter. I stand up and sit next to him, but I feel his arm around my shoulder and he makes me lay next to him, still with his arm around me.

"Look!" he says smiling like crazy. He shows me a really funny video. As much as I try to hold in my laughter, I explode and laugh with him.

I feel so happy right now, it's the first time I laugh like this with my brother. I don't want this moment to end.

We ended up watching funny videos all day long and laughing together, him still with his arm around me.

By the end of the day I look at him and realize how much time we've wasted over some useless and random fights.

And that's how we ended our day: laughing like crazy and holding each other.

A couple of days has passed and now it's Monday morning. I spent the rest of the weekend having fun with my brother, watching funny videos and studying together. I still don't know why he's changed so drastically, but I don't want to know. I'm afraid that if I ask him, something bad will happen. So I'll leave things like this and enjoy these precious moments.

Another class just started everyone looks shocked as I ask Jungwook to go shopping with me today. And they freeze even more after they hear my brother saying yes to me.

After classes, we headed to buy some clothes right away. I asked Jungkook for some advices. I wanted to try some new styles.

Now I'm in the changing room trying on other clothes, when I hear my brother saying:

"Wow Jungkook. You have a really nice body!"

I turn around seeing him looking at my body and quickly cover my self in embarrassment, looking away blushing. He insists to see my body and once I give in, he keeps complimenting me more. He's talking about how good my abs look and about my pumped chest and arms. It's not that I do much, I just some random exercises when I'm alone.

"Great, now you have a whole new wardrobe!" Jungwook says holding a couple of bags full of new clothes.

"Jungwook" I say firmly "Why did you change all of a sudden? Not that I don't like the situation right now, but I'm really curious. Please be honest" as I ask him that question I see his big smile becoming small.

"It's just..." he says looking down "I just think that we had no reason to fight over stupid things" he the continues with a sweet smile. It doesn't seem like he's faking it or forcing it. It rather seems like it's the truth and that there's something else, but I don't want to ruin our relationship, so I won't ask until he's fully ready.

Now we're back home and I'm putting my new clothes in my closet. Jungwook is helping me and in the meantime and he's singing a sweet and romantic song. The words he's singing reminds me of y/n. It hurts a little. No, very much. It really hurts like hell.

Why do I still feel this way towards her, even after what she did to me? Or maybe she didn't mean to cause all of this chaos. She lied to me, I get it, but for some reason, I've already forgiven her. Unconsciously.

Me and my brother decided to watch a horror movie. We're not afraid of these kind of movies, but I have to be honest, we both really hate jump-scares. Speaking of that, one of that comes right after and we both jump in surprise.

I find him hugging me tight and I freeze, without knowing what to do. His head is now resting on my chest and his arms are around my body. after a couple of seconds he slowly looks up at me and we lock eyes. It's actually really awkward but funny at the same time. I burst out laughing.

"AHAHAHAHAHAH THE STRONG JUNGWOOK IS AFRAID OF A MISERABLE HORROR MOVIE" I say laughing and teasing him.

"That's not true!" he shouts back at me, making me flinch and become serious.

We're looking at each other. Him mad because of my teasing and me scared that I may ruined our relationship, until...

"Pff" I see him laughing a bit and then we both burst out laughing again and holding each other.

The days went by pretty fast and I really enjoyed my time with my brother. We really became close and talked about everything. Y/n didn't show up once and now I really miss her so much. I think this feelings towards her, will never go away. A part from that, things were going great, until Friday.

We're in class right now and I'm talking to Jungwook, explaining him another math problem.

"You need to do this, in order to solve it" I say.

"Ohh I see"

Now I'm used to everyone staring at us. I mean, as long as I'm happy with him, nothing else matters, right? I still think that there's something more behind his sudden change , but I don't really want to make him angry or sad, so I just stick with this and keep my doubt.

As the class ends, I start to think about y/n, again. maybe I should go and visit her. Or maybe she doesn't want to see me. Right. Wait, what? She's the one who lied to me, so it should be me the one that doesn't want to see her. But why do I feel this way? Is she really the right one for me?

I kept questioning myself the whole day, until 4 PM.

"Jungkook!" I hear my brother calling my name "I'm going to hang out with Jimin and Rosé. Do you want to come?" he says smiling brightly.

"No, I think I'll stay at home today. I'm really tired, I think I'll sleep a little"

"Oh..." I see him a bit sad "ok, make sure to rest well!" he then says, showing me a sweet smile.

He left, and now I'm alone in my room. I stayed in bed all day, thinking about my brother and y/n.

Now it's 8 PM and it's really dark outside. My brother will come home at any moment, so I'll prepare something to eat for both of us. I grab my phone and head downstairs. I open up the fridge and look what's inside. I see a bag with some steak in. As I take it in my hands, I remember the date with y/n and when I fed her a piece of the same steak. I smile a little at the memory, but then I feel a tear leaving my eyes. It keeps hurting even more than before. I really like her. No, I love her. Everything she does.

I hear my phone ringing and as I take it out I rub my eyes, making my tears disappear and then look at the screen. It's my brother.

"Jungkook, come to the hospital! Now!" he shouts. He seems out of breath, like if he ran.

"Why? What happened? Are you ok?" I ask really worried.

"I'm ok" he says and I sight in relief "But Y/n is not"

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