#I need more of them I gotta be honest
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I love how these two have silent moments of affection. Like we can see here just from the hand holding how much this meant to Zhan Zheng Xi. They don’t need words to communicate how they feel abt each other and I’m HERE FOR IT🗣️🗣️
#LOVE THEM SM#I need more of them I gotta be honest#19 days old xian#19 days#jian yi x zhan zheng xi#jian yi#zhan zheng xi
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heartbreaking: beloved mutual reblogs obvious propaganda and dogwhistles but ur too emotionally attacked to block them
#guys please i am begging u think for a second before reblogging the most antisemitic shit i’ve ever heard disguised as antizionism#yes israel sucks but remember alotta ppl hate them more for being jewish than committing genocide#and if ur gonna be reblogging alotta stuff abt this u gotta be careful abt what kinda stuff ur reblogging#i honest to god do not have the energy for this#please for the love of everything ever think before reblogging that “israel’s stealing baby blood and hamas is good actually” shit#i have these tags blocked for a reason but those badly disguised nazis can’t even tag right#im so fucking sick of this i don’t wanna have to make this post everytime i see smthn on my dash that u could find on a neo-nazi site#antisemtism#tell me if i need to add any extra tags to this btw
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Aylin Posting again :)
It's the girls lounging by the lake by moonrise.
Y'know before it all went wrong.
(rambles and ideas under cut)
I really wanna draw the scene where Aylin first comes down from the moon bathed heavens to great Reithwin town to great the nobility.
Like it starts with Isobel bemoaning the day ahead, her father Kethric is genuinly the most excited he's ever been since its been the first time something like this has happened. Ketheric takes it as a sign from his late wife and therefore is needling Isobel to "put her best foot forward" and "make her mother proud".
And like Isobel loves being a cleric, is great at it and is excited about this but at the same time after bearing the burden of her father's grief for so long, she also feels suffocated by constantly being there for Ketheric, clerical duties, being a noble ect.
Like just once she wants to act in her own self-interests.
So like the whole town funnels outside to the gate part near the mason guild sigil. Its a full moon of course Isobel rolls her eyes but maintains stature. Her dad seems elated yet desperate that its the sign he's been hoping for all this time even though he'll never find what he's searching for. The town folk have all these banners and banquets and stuff to greet this heavenly messenger. No one knows what's coming but they know its good.
Only for the moon to be eclipsed by an enormous pair of wings. A single flap alone, fluttering the clothes and hair of the whole town. Deep and powerful feather strokes echo throughout the now silence townspeople. A steady rhythm that vibrates in your chest cavity.
Divine moonlight bleeds through the feathers almost blindingly, its not an elegant or graceful creature that Selune blessed the people of moonrise with.
She is loud, armed and armored, landing on the ground with a thunderous force. Her face radiant, her smile jubilant to the point of feeling threatening. Some more cowardly townfolk tremble under her seering gaze. A force of nature, a paladin of Our Lady of Silver. She bellows out to the crowd:
"FEAR NOT THE GENTLE FOLK OF MOONRISE. FOR IT IS I, DAME AYLIN, DAUGHTER OF SELUNE HERSELF PALADIN OF-"
(I assume she goes on for a while, its her first time in the mortal realm she doesn't understand time and the concept of being concise)
And Isobel is just fully smitten. Absolutely floored, completely and utterly in love.
(i always think she fell first, then after Aylin has dwindled out the crowd with her divine ramblings, Isobel greets her formally and that's when Aylin is like <3<3<3)
I Don't know the first thing about writing comics or panneling but I wanna make this happen somehow. Any tips would be amazing!
#bg3#bg3 fanart#dame aylin bg3#bg3 aylin#To be honest this got away from me slighlty#Well not like got away from me more like#Theses wings man#they so big and animated but they take SO LONG#Like ugh#Also If I get to be able to draw the scene where they fall in love Y'all get ready#Cuz I will#I gotta its my faves!!!#I need them!!!!!!!
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so i'm assuming that all the stuff going down at WBD has likely killed the HBO max adaptation of the gentleman's guide to vice and virtue? the last of anything i can find about it is from 2019.
#gotta be honest this turn of events wouldn't break my heart.#the gentleman's guide to vice and virtue#tggtvav#caitlin.txt#(i'm just. tired of adaptations. tbqh)#(and i think these books stand more than well enough on their own. i don't need to see them in live action)
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The differences are what makes the other so intriguing!
#Doodles#Pajama Sam#Florette#Luke Wigglebig#Flukette#If I had to guess they probably don't have a ship name hmmm#Considering there's Almost no fanart I can find of them haha#Especially together which is Weird 'cause like - they're always the first two delegates :0 What's with that#Well anyway whatever I'm used to rarepairs by now lol#Starting with a simple sleeping side-by-side ♥ Florette's florets have gotta be nice to nap on ♪#Speaking of - there's no real candy equivalent to nature's design#Tiny flowers just aren't that common and then there's the fact that Luke's made of sugar and presumably mostly hangs out with other candies#My original doodles of them have a set where Flo tells him off for staring and he apologizes haha - they're just so alien to him!#So he finally gets to touch here congrats on the level up in relationship lol#Why were you being honest in so much detail you weirdo#Lol ♪#I do love his embarrassed face looking off to the side and then hiding his face in his arms haha#Florette can't even facepalm about it#Or can she!! What if arms were more of an accessory than an actual body part?? Clearly this needs exploration through drawing lol#She'd look very cute in a jacket ♪ I was imagining a nice subdued purple would compliment her well :)#Very convenient for things like reaching shelves and making fists lol
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Btw just changed up the page navigation layout for The Talk comic !! I’ll make a master post of all the pages after the comic is finished bc LMAO all those links increasing every page killed me
#cal rambles#i cant believe I was like YEAHH I’ll just sketch the next four pages and then finish them later in the week to naturally space them out!#and then I proceeded to finish FOUR WHOLE PAGES in one day LMAO#i had to change the layout bc I had the realization that I was gonna need to put EIGHT LINKS on one post#and I would have to do it AFTER I posted bc otherwise the post would get voided from the tags#so I was like MAN. I CANT DO THIS BRO#so I changed it to a first page previous page next page system LMAO#also yes get ready for the next three comic pages in the next week <3#if ur actually this far into my ramblings I’m impressed LMAO#I’ll throw u a bone then: the next one will come out tomorrow and then on Monday and then on Thursday or Friday idk I haven’t decided#whatever I feel like by then in the week#but yaaaay exciting there’s only three more pages I gotta draw before this comic is done#and I’ll move on to the next story beat in the doodle dot au verse :3c#I’m gonna be honest this is gonna be a lil dramatic#like yes v cute au but also I LOVE oak family feels ok#i promise I’ll do something funner after this comic is done <33#i just very much needed to establish Dot’s complicated relationship w/ Lark and Sparrow first and foremost I think#OH and I don’t think I ever established this in the comic#but yeah Normal and Hero were immediately grounded LMAOOOO#that’s why they’re not at the table w/ Dot#they were banished to their rooms so the Adults™️ could ‘deal with the situation’#of course Normal hated this btw#but Dot convinced him to go
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how many risks do y'all take following regular people associated with the boys just to get their whereabouts?
This is one of my favorite asks of all time and I will not be incriminated
#anyone with less than 3k followers is a stressful interaction imo#when there are parties or hangs it’s not as much cuz you know tags in the moment#but I’ll say all the hometown boys (Marc. Dorl. Jason) softblocked randoms at one point on all socials and went private#and if you don’t want people in your business that’s what you need to do. everyone else is pretty much fair game#if you’re private but allow accept random follows then you aren’t really private#these are my own rules of invasiveness I guess but people gotta know who they’re associated with and what their sharing#also if you follow 1000+ accounts imo you look less sus popping up in peoples follows cuz like you just follow anything huh#also also tb perfectly honest it def reached a point where the mystery stopped being fun and became fully weird and sad#I don’t necessarily enjoy finding shit they don’t want us to know and am more interested in them sharing! or giving something and we peek#but I do find interest in what they choose not to share especially these days 🤷♀️
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I was walking my neighbor’s dog this morning and I was not very awake so I’ve just remembered that I spent the entire time in a vague hazy state of annoyance at the characterization in brave new world from echoes and refractions
#ik I posted some excerpts from it in like a semi positive light and I do still like the part#where ro laren is thinking about how if she had a sister she might be like sito#but I gotta be honest I think it was one of those ‘for a moment I was so caught up in sito jaxa content that for a moment#I forgot that the characterization for wesley was not very good’#harder to complain about jaxa characterization like it doesn’t match mine but I’m aware that there’s only so much canon basis#but the wesley characterization felt like projection more often than not#like idr how/if it dealt with the crash because they’re both still in starfleet so that’s already something you have to account for#(or I guess you don’t Have To I can’t tell them what to do but it was weird how little it did)#but it also refers to wesley as not understanding people/being bad with people#and especially pre-crash I don’t think that’s true in the sense it’s being used there#he doesn’t have trouble making initial connections and while he seemingly has issues maintaining long term friendships/relationships#that’s a different thing and seems to be at least partly situational bc the first time he makes real friends is when they’re on even ground#and again. icarus factor B plot.#with like figuring out worf is upset and working very hard to help him#which I suppose you can argue about intuitive vs deliberately observational understanding but it is There#you can see my thoughts deteriorating I just think people need to know and perceive better#san rant
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uh, i agree with lack of female characters in bsd :( so disappointing. i am angry how authors push them in the far back. at least kyouka, yosano, and lucy got their spotlight! this is why yosano's backstory is so important <3
Ye I knowwwww let's talk about it bestie 😔😔
All the female characters have so much potential and their abilities are pretty cool yet they barely get any screentime ;;;;;; Really praying we'll get to see any more of them soon, even if it's Teruko. And Yosano's story was amazing!!! It added so much depth to the character, unironically I consider it the peak of bsd. Anyways stan all of bsd women ❤️❤️❤️
#Idk like. I don't mention it often because uhmm it's just bad vibes you know?#I don't want to focus over it too much bsd is a pastime to have fun ahah#But at the same time with time I realized it's important to mention it#because I saw people praise bsd's female characters writing and uh. UH#Like it's okay not to focus over it but you gotta be conscious of the fact that the writing is sexist.#It's important to recognize it otherwise you'll end up not recognizing it irl too!!#And the list on reasons why the writing is sexist is AGONIZINGLY long.#Okay recs of manga / anime with very good female protagonists I love: tpn (manga only) (duh)#klk (it's kind of an hot mess but the female characters are well written and the fanservice is explained and makes sense in plot–#and my favorite anime ever sooooo) Psycho-Pass (VERY good v v good)#There's definitely more but those are ones I really like ////#bsd#people asks me stuff#Why do you think my user us about Kyouka despite my blog being clearly sskk centered ahah#Because I need to set my priorities straight lmao#Tbh... Tbh unpopular opinion but I think Lucy got the more unlucky with writing... That's why I'll love her the most ❤️#I really like Kouyou though and suspect writing her this well was like. accidental lmao#Let's be honest author just doesn't know how to write women it's. it's literally that.#Also like WHY BONES HAD TO ADD FEMALE FANSERVICE I HATE THEM SO FREAKING MUCH I WANT TO SCREAM EVERY TIME I REMEMBER ABOUT IT#LIKE THERE WAS ONE (1) THING THEY WERE MISSING ON THE LIST OF DISRESPECTING FEMALE CHARACTERS AND. YET.#Anyways thank you for the ask I'm keeping up unusually well with answering people on this blog ahah#I hope you're having a wonderful day / night Nyusa 💕💕💕#Edit: Throwback to that time I made that bsd tier list and put all the female characters on the first tier out of pure spite LMAO
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#well uh#SO MUCH FOR TALKING THINGS OUT WITH HIM I FUCKING GUESS#nothere stuff and his own brainbastard decided to ruin that plan so uh.....gotta wait another week i fucking guess#im so tired of holding in the urge to talk things out with him just so fucking tired#also i hate to say it but ngl smile might have his bastard beat? idk really dont wanna compare them but at least his doesnt seem relentless#which is good because jfc he already has a hard enough time as is??he really doesnt need some asshole getting worse holy shit dude#hell im halfsure that his bastard is lying to me or at least twisting the truth....doesnt seem honest at all tbh (or maybe just like mine)#jfc now i have even more to talk to him about gdi#why the fuck did he split his own smiley why
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#also; I don't say it cause I don't want to be rude or be shitting on anyone's religion; but if you're praying for me... don't#If I'm more candid than I usually am; I don't like it; I don't believe; I don't want it; and it makes me uncomfortable#I let people cause it helps them and they want to; but it sure as fuck doesn't help me and I don't like it#I don't come out and say it this bluntly cause I don't want to be an asshole; but that's the honest truth#it ends up (in this specific case; with me; not talking about praying in general) being a hell of a lot more about you than about me#and I don't normally care about that; but like if you're trying to help then I feel like maybe that's a bit backwards#know I'd think it was backwards if something I was doing was more to help me feel better than the person I wanted to help#like I'm not gonna get mad; it's your business; but I don't like it#and I've tried to gently tell people I don't like it; do it diplomatically as possible; cause I know people get weird about praying#get nasty frankly; like there's no denying people get mean about people praying#(though I gotta be honest; I do kinda get it; you might not get how it is with people always being so damn pushy about it)#but I try not to be the person getting nasty about it... but I don't like it#and not to shit on that anon; but you come to me and you tell me to go get help but that you'll pray#didn't ask for your prayers and this is honestly the exact reason I don't like people praying for me#either actually offer me a hand in some way or leave me to deal with it myself#I don't believe in your god; any one's god really; question of what happens after death doesn't interest me#all I know is there's a lot of work to be done in there here and now and whatever answer there is after... doesn't change it#I could die and be told I was sinful for trying to help the wrong people or something... so damn me; I don't recant and I don't repent#so I don't really care about your god or what they think of me; they can like me if they want and they can hate me if they want#I don't need you interceding on my behalf; sometimes things go good for me and sometimes they go shit#if the good things were because someone prayed then that's mighty nice and all; but if that's what it takes I'd rather learn to stand#like; playing those publisher clearing house sweepstakes; I'm obviously hoping for luck; but I'm not gonna fucking pray for that#plus for me personally; prayer always feels real damn selfish so much of the time; don't ask for anything for me#I'm not even fully against it; once or twice I've prayed for someone cause it's what they wanted... doubt it helped#but I'll do what I'm asked when I can muster it and respect their beliefs#so now; and hopefully without being too mean about it; I'm asking you to respect mine#stop praying for me#lend me an actual hand; or since you probably can't do that (know I can't many of the places I'd like to)#feel free to offer a kind word instead and I'll say think you kindly#but you're not a brother keeper; I'm not your responsibility; let me fester and die; or thrive with my bitter soul; or whatever will come
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oh man I sure love being a 22 soon to be 23 year old plagued with the physical ailments of a 40 year old because I inherited all the chronic issues from every side of the family.
#so um...my gandma has bone porosity and considering that my stiff fingers problem can also be caused by bone porosity#I now gotta go get checked for that bc I've never been before but my mom had it since she was in her 20s too so I guess that is just#a nother thing that is well known in the family that everyone got checked for at a young age except for me#because I am perfectly normal and just need to get myself to gether a little more I guess#also if I really have bone porosity it is either bye bye to my plan of getting rid of my uterus the second I turn 30#bc the drop in hormones can make it much much worse#or having to do hormone injections#and I'll be honest with yoh I'll do the hormone injections if i have to#and next thing you know I'm a black market dealer for the E to all my fellow trans girls who have been sitting on a waiting list#for *checks notes* over 6 years with doctos continously trying to talk them out of it because they might change their mind and all that bs#like bro if someone waits six years to get something you better believe they mcfuckin mean it allright
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...@ the rose release the rest of the dates for other countries so i can determine when i need to request pto
#honest to god i could... feasibly go to two........ one vvip and one vvvip if prices stay the same for europe#based on......well... yeah APPARENTLY automation is not a normal skill... bonus (also bonus is NEVER in my budget plans)#(my bonus has literally always been free money that i can do w/e i want with)#(so if that w/e happens to be....a two city vacation in europe to see the rose twice... hopefully it'll be that)#(now I REALLY REGRET not just doing atlanta last weekend tbh but BONUS IS NOT MONEY UNTIL IT'S PROMISED)#i feel like my review was like ADHD freak...repeatedly#it was like ''well she can reverse engineer any proceess and likes tinkering w/ things#BUT pls girlie... try to not interrupt ppl when u know the answer''#HEY if things stay the same with what our raises and bonuses have been#my fiance can have his girlboss malewife dreams (if his mom wasn't a psycho with ''traditional'' values he'd be perfect lol#like man has literally taken a pto day to batch make homemade dumplings cause i like them he's the best!!!!#i told him he's gotta save all his pto for our honeymoon next november tho like.... i have 2 more weeks than him)#BUT we're like in an okay position to be able to have kids....... and in a few years we'll probably be in the position where if#he wanted to he could be the sahp if we needed LOL#IDEAL#personal
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have a gcse exam thingy 2morrow 💀
#i had 1 on monday#and i cant remember a thing of it#well maybe a little#but i dont want 2 think about it LMAO#but not bc i did badly#(idk how well i did)#but idk i need to live in the moment and not be bogged down by things of the past#<-wisdom#but all i gotta do is this one other exam cuz the gcse has 2 papers#and then im free 2 access everything in my mind again#and let go of everything else#until the Next One#and the one after that after that after that#and its going to be an endless cycle like a timeloop#except things get Progressively Worse#but we'll burn that bridge when we come to it#anyways i did cut outs of newspaper words to make a song yesterday for a songwriting class i do#and it was really fun and i wish i could do sort of creative things like that more often#and mine fucking slapped imma be honest#bc I LOVE USING WORDS I LOVE CREATING STRANGE STORIES PLEASE IM CALLING UPON THE GODS OF DEATH ASKING THEM TO GRANT THIS ONE WISH#that i may one day be able to spill all the sweet honeyed words of the false deities out of my mouth#to sing and revel in the shower of blood and the dew on the grass#and to one day be freed from the grey tinted glasses#and the shackles on my wrists and the screwdrivers stuck in my brain#to scream until my throat is hoarse and to feel rage and love and happiness and sadness and pain and joy#i just need to defeat the Screamers and the Metal Angels and the Knockers#or die trying#anyways#red meows
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5 RULES TO REMAIN UNBOTHERED
Rule 1 - Expect less from people:
The first rule to staying unbothered is to expect less from people. Not everyone is you, and you can't expect other peole to hold themselves to the high standards that you set for yourself and it isn't your job to force them to see their potential. Everyone else is going out every weekend, vaping and thinks you're uncool? They don't have your drive or your ambition. Focus on yourself.
Rule 2: Stop arguing with people:
It's not your responsibility to make stupid people recognize that they are stupid. Do not waste your time trying to convince people that you are right they have already made up their mind about you. Prove them wrong with your actions; if they aren't paying your bills, they are irrelevant.
Rule 3: If they wanted to, they would:
Self-explanatory, and especially applies to guys. If he wanted to test you, he would. I he wanted to actually plan something instead of sending a last minute "wyd," he would. Invest your time into someone wo actually cares about you
Rule 4: Log off:
Be honest with yourself when you get on social media, do you feel inspired or like you're wasting time? So much of social media is time sink designed to make you less productive. Ignore the bad takes, block out the negativity, all of means nothing I knew I matured when I realized every situation doesn't need at reaction. Sometimes you just gotta leave people to do the lame shit they do.
Rule 5: Ask "okay, and:
Being unbothered is all about knowing your worth your opinion of you is so much more valid than that random person at school or work who's jealous of you, let's be honest. When someone says something negative to you ask yourself "okay, and some random girl says she hates you, will that really affect your life? No Keep your eyes on the price, and keep perspective by focusing on things that really matter skincare and workouts, academies, investing, making money, and becoming the best version of yourself
#inspiration#self love#motivation#self help#self improvement#self care#glow up#glow up era#becoming that girl#manifesation#self confidence#self development#self awareness#personal growth#positive mindset#self growth#growth mindset#priorities
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anti-binge guide:
~ read this list 20 times ~
count to 100 very slowly
talk on the phone with someone
clean up something gross (bye I never did this one to be honest, lmao. no thank yo)
go out on a walk
pour salt over craving food (also a popular one I never did. a bitch just didn’t like to waste salt or food like that. i say that while heavily relying on number 10 🤡)
make a list of triggers + avoid them // find low cal fibrous, filling alternatives
go outside and do 20 pushups + 100 jumping jacks (the jiggling was enough of an anti-binge lmao); bonus, do in front of a mirror (this is just cruel but also effective so idk yall, take your gander)
take a shot of ACV (LIGHT IT UPPPP lmao, pretend you’re clubbing but the vodka is vinegar and rather than feeling buzzed and happy, you’re miserable and desperate. but babes, we gotta romanticize this, so party it up anyways lmao)
sleep
c/s (wastes food, but worked wonders for me. just make sure you have at least a bite at the end, and rinse the mouth, but don’t brush to preserve that enamel)
listen to a podcast / read a book
watch something gory
write in your diary
th1nsp0
make a food planner for next week
calculate the deficit yoo’ll maintain for the week and the lbs progress if you don’t binge (it feels like a reward then, to refrain)
online window shop for clothes you want to fit in
dance / go on a run
take a shower/bath
do some self care. attend to those emotional needs rather than using food as an emotional crutch. sis is not your therapist.
chew on ice (i was never this desperate lmao)
plan a controlled metabolism day and work the foods you want to binge on now in that day to practice moderation and portion control while also reinforcing discipline
STOP if you have already started. you don’t have to continue. you’re okay. you still have control. stop now and prove it to yourself.
learn some biology (human anatomy, physiology, etc)
✨some affirmations✨:
~ repeat these to yourself for as long as it takes for the urge to binge to go away ~
food does not hold power over me
i don’t actually want this
*this food* actually really grosses me out
i don’t even like to eat
i’m going to put this away because i don’t need it and i listen to my needs
i am such an intuitive eater. i know when to stop eating naturally
its so easy for me to not eat
not eating is so easy
i take care of my emotional needs rather than numbing them away with food
food won’t make me feel better. self care will
i take care of myself.
i am committed to taking care of myself
i don’t even want to eat anymore.
i have no appetite. i never do
this food taste so gross and it lingers in the mouth. why would i want to eat something like that
i naturally crave fruits and vegetables.
i naturally eat healthy
i feel so much lighter and happier when i don’t eat
i feel better now that i said no to *this food*
i don’t really need food
i am actually really thirsty. i need water, not food
i am okay
i have control over myself and my body because i listen to it and take of it
i have discipline because i am naturally built for this
i am okay
i will be okay
this urge is not the end of the world. i don’t have to give in
just because i have a desire, that doesn’t compel me to fulfil it. i have more self control than that
i am okay.
i will be okay.
i am strong
i am okay
#4n0r3xia#4norexi4#ana trigger#anadiet#4norexla#4n4blr#4n4rexia#@nor3×14#@na vent#@na rules#@na trigger#@na tips#tw ed diet#tw ana diary#ed not ed sheeran#ed not sheeren#ed disorder#3dblrr#3ating d1sorder#tw 3d vent
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