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#Casual sex
hush-writes-preg · 4 months
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The train is packed, and your large, pregnant belly is trapped amongst countless other bodies in the crowd when you first feel the hand.
It's subtle at first, just barely brushing against your backside as if to test your reaction. You know you should feel outraged that someone would dare touch a stranger on the train, let alone a pregnant one, but their fingers are gentle, and you're honestly starved for contact. So you don't say anything. You keep your gaze fixed firmly ahead, silently waiting to see what they will do next.  
The stranger wastes no time in growing bolder, the hand sliding over the curve of your ass and rubbing it almost appreciatively. They shift from one cheek to the other, cautiously testing the shape of it before giving your bottom a careful squeeze.  
It's enough to steal the breath from your lungs. Who are they? You know you should be protesting, should be drawing away, should be calling them out for the impropriety, but it feels so good. As shameful as it is to admit it, you don't want them to stop.  
So you keep standing there, your arms wrapped protectively around your swollen abdomen, and continue letting them fondle you.
It takes everything you've got not to cry out when that hand dips between your legs, cupping you where you so desperately want to be touched. No one's touched you like this since the night you got knocked up, and your body craves pleasure like your lungs crave air. You can feel the flush creeping up your neck and face when their fingers start to move, following the line of your growing arousal before beginning to stroke you right through your trousers.  
You lose track of the crowd, of the stops, of the lurching motions of the train. All you can think about is the way those fingers are pleasuring you right here in the open while you have no idea who they belong to.  
You want to lean back into them and breathlessly beg them to keep going. You want to unbuckle your trousers and let them slide their hands beneath the fabric to touch you directly. You want to invite them back to your place to finish the job, to bend you over your bed and pound your greedy hole until you can't see straight to make up for all these sexless months. 
You want--
The train jerks to a stop at what can only be the main station. The hand between your legs tries to draw away as the crowd begins to disperse, but you instinctively squeeze your legs together to trap it in place. "My stop's next," you frantically whisper, hoping against hope that they can hear you over the din. "Follow me home? Please?"
There's no verbal response, but those glorious fingers begin moving again, and that's good enough for now. 
You can't help but let out a soft whimper, spreading your thighs just a little bit farther apart. This definitely isn't the best decision you've ever made, but right now, you don't know if you can be bothered enough to care.  
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incognitopolls · 4 months
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We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.
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larissasexyblog · 1 year
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La vie et la magie.
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nostxlgiax · 4 months
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mama (i need help) | knj
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title: mama (i need help) | knj (18+)
pairing: kim namjoon x yoongi's sister!reader
genre: angst, drama, smut
word count: 3k
status: complete
synopsis: the min legacy is culinary excellence, but the youngest heirs rather cook beats, dance, and do big dumb boys; off the books.
warnings: unprotected sex, semi public sex, thigh riding, face riding, studio sex, secret (not) relationship, depression, one instance of vouyer and exhibitionism, reader may've fucked jungkook once or twice, degradation kink, praise kink, slut shaming (consensual pls)
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namjoon’s studio isn’t any bigger once the cheque snakes it’s way through sports, visual, and performance art sections. it’s still nestled in the far back of the basement floor, soundproof and insulated well, with a new processing ram and very expensive soundboard from his personal wishlist.
his canceling headphones have a snag, the sound comes out in gurgled static on the left side; it vibes with the old school urban hip hop sound he’s been going for.
“yoons’ help me out with this one.” he explains when a smooth bass filters through.
it’s melodic, nothing like anything else he’s played before.
her brother’s talented where he wants to be, but she’d rather die before letting him know.
“boo sucks at everything he does.” she replies happily, turning one of the few dials she knows. unlabelled and confident.
“you suck too.” he pulls her in his lap; the gaming chair he bought from jungkook creaks.
her eyes are closed as he kneads her skin; digging at his favorite spots. his lips search for her’s from the shoulder onward and up.
his voice is steady out the speaker, raw and rough.
it reminds her of their recent escapade in the pantry. tucked behind sauce and spice, bending out of pots and pans’ way.
she can taste him if she tries,
“and swallow.”
© copyright ciani jayde 2024
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jhutchismyl0verb0y · 29 days
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Derek Danforth.
@onenonlydanforth
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femmefatalevibe · 8 months
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is hookup culture a bad thing
Any expectations of women (or men/anyone of any gender) in an attempt to control their sexuality in some way is a bad thing for sure. I think it depends on what you mean by "hookup culture."
If you mean, is it bad that it is now acceptable for women to have casual sex with as many people as they desire with less shame? Then, no "hookup culture" aka sexual liberation is a great thing.
But if you mean "hookup culture" as in expecting, demanding, or depersonalizing sexual experiences (which also can lead to more bad sex than necessary), I would say hookup culture is a bad thing – not because it's casual but because it lacks humanity and feels like the other side of the same coin as purity culture.
No one should be shamed or limited with their sexual autonomy as long it's all consenting adults involved.
Hope this helps xx
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I'm available for all type of fun 😋👅and I also sell hot sexy contents 😋🔥💦❤️
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fuzzyghost · 2 years
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softer-fatter-happier · 5 months
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Being on the aspec, I never understood why people don't want to have sex with their friends. I've done it and I think it's the best tbh so I agree, everyone have consensual, kinky sex with your friends!! It's amazing! ESPECIALLY if you're gay. -Hucow Anon
Omg yes! Like that or just being more intimate with them like not even full sex but still things like sexual yaknow?
Like kissing friends, cuddling with friends, casually wearing little clothes with friends, feeling up friends as you watch something on TV.
Throw in feedism and you can do a whole bunch of other stuff too. Making huge meals and seeing who can eat the most, giving belly rubs to each other after said meal. Teasing each other about new weight, feeling each others stretch marks and new softer bodies.
Gahhhh I want to do things with my friends!
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sitp-recs · 1 year
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hiii i just breezed through that slutty drarry reclist wheww you’re doing god’s work what a wonderful list!!!! i see you’re getting a lot of asks lately so feel free to answer this (or not!!) whenever you feel like it, but i was wondering if you knew of any fics where harry gives up his slutty lifestyle for draco, sort of like “harry potter gives a shit” by talithan. i would prefer if it was harry but the vice versa is also fine! we’re so lucky to have you in this fandom and i feel grateful every time i see your posts on my dash, thank you so much for everything!!! <3
Hello my friend! Love that for us, I’ve had lots of fun putting that slutty reclist together and am always happy to find taste twins when it comes to smut 😏 personally I’ve been more into open relationships lately but you might enjoy these fics where either Harry or Draco have casual sex before getting together:
Harry:
Amber by @slytherco (E, 4.7k)
Despite his numerous flings, Harry's thoughts keep circling back to Draco, only half-aware of his perpetual draw where they're not strangers, not-quite friends, but definitely something. When they both get played by the same person, Harry and Draco find a way to get back at him, and maybe get something extra out of it as a result.
100 Beats per Minute by @oknowkiss (E, 14k)
When Draco left the Magical World behind at nineteen, he didn't expect the cusp of thirty would find him comfortable and secure, with a stable life and a successful career as a sex columnist.
Five Weddings and a Potions Accident by lauren3210 (E, 19k)
In which Harry thinks he’s a playboy, everyone else knows better, and Hermione will kill Seamus if Ron tries to collect on that bet.
Famous by @fw00shy (E, 24k)
It's a couple of years after the war, and Harry's bored of models now, the same way he's bored of Ron's constant nagging, bored of his Weasley monogram knitwear, bored of the same fucking grin that greets him when he hands his fire-truck red Bugatti over to the valet every night. He wants to find—well, he isn't sure what he wants. Anything but models.
Terrible People by wolfpants (E, 53k)
What happens when Harry and Draco end up on the same Muggle gay cruise? They certainly didn't plan for it to happen (but their friends might have). They're stuck with each other for a week, they might as well make the most of it, right? Featuring a holiday-long game of Truth or Dare, a very ill-judged FWB proposition, decades-long pining, lots of gin, and a small pair of green swimming trunks.
A Secondary Education by Thunderbird587 (E, 234k)
Fleeing the aftermath of his recent divorce, Draco Malfoy takes up a post as the new Potions Master at Hogwarts. At first he believes his hopes for a fresh start are dashed when he sees that a certain boyhood rival is on staff there as well. But Harry Potter is being weirdly nice to him, leaving Draco no choice but to play along.
Draco:
Hourglass Heart by @bixgirl1 (E, 5k)
It only happened once — depending on how Harry counted.
Death Dreams by @writcraft (E, 9.5k)
Draco likes to keep things casual, or at least he did before Harry Potter barged back into his life.
Keep your hands on me by @tenthousandyearsx (E, 21k)
Malfoy binds himself with a sex curse. Harry cannot get enough (but would much prefer to keep Malfoy for himself).
The Things We Need by @Kbrick (E, 25k) - established Drarry, polyamory
Three hundred and fifty-three days out of the year, Harry is in a monogamous, fufilling relationship with Draco Malfoy. Then there are the other twelve days.
I Bet That You Look Good on the Dancefloor by birdsofshore (E, 28k)
Harry felt lit up from inside as soon as he entered the bar. There were blokes dancing together, their bodies close to one another, not keeping a wary distance as Harry was always careful to do when he was near another man. God, he wanted this – wanted it so much he could taste it, a metallic tang of heat and desire. He suspected nothing would ever be the same again – especially when he saw who else was in the room.
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jule1122 · 9 months
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Malex Fic - Fuck my way through college
Written for @rnmafterdark Day 3. This is chapter 1 of 2, but it can completely stand alone. Chapter 1 is mostly casual sex and chapter 2 will be more sex but with feelings.
This is a college AU I've been trying to write since I first heard the line "Fuck my way through college" from Glass Animal's "Take a Slice." Sex and sexuality are looked at and talked about with college levels of majority. There are references to Michael and Alex with others, but the sex scenes are between the two of them.
Additional Warnings: Alex sings a lyric from Green Day's "American Idiot" that contains a homophobic slur. It's not used as a slur, but the word is there. For the dubious consent - Michael sees Alex giving someone else a blow job, he enters the room and with Alex's consent jerks Alex off. The other person is not aware Michael is there until the end, but it not upset.
Fuck my way through college Chapter 1 on A03
Summary: When Michael's roommate hooks up with the guy who gives the best blow jobs on campus, Michael never expected it to be Alex Manes.
“You know what I want right now,” Michael says as he passes Chris the joint they’ve been sharing.
Chris glances over at the empty pizza boxes piled on the desk and sighs, “Wings?”
Michael hums in agreement. “Wings would be awesome, but I really want a blow job.”  It’s not that being high makes him horny, exactly, but it does make him crave contact.  He wants to kiss someone and hold them and then have them hold his dick in his mouth until he gets hard and comes.
“Been awhile?” Chris sympathizes.
“Too long,” Michael whines.  He’d gotten all his gen ed requirements out of the way his freshman year and had breezed through with plenty of time for parties and sex.  Now faced with demands of a double engineering major, he’s been unprepared for the amount of time his midterm projects consume.
“You still bi?” Chris asks as he hands the joint back to Michael.
If anyone else asked, Michael would be offended, but Chris shrugged off Michael’s sexuality confession with a casual “cool” when they were paired as roommates last year.  Chris is easy going enough that he and Michael are still roommates and friends a year later. And in his defense, Michael isn’t sure Chris has ever seen him hook up with a guy, and his only attempt at a relationship has been an ill advised three weeks with Katie last spring.
Michael takes a long drag before answering.  “Kind of a permanent state.”
“Just checking, cause I know a guy.”
“You know a guy?” Michael asks with a laugh. Michael isn’t sure why he’s even surprised.  Chris knows a guy for everything - a guy who will write papers for you, a guy who can get you into all the good bars, a guy with keys to all the campus buildings.  And now apparently a guy for blow jobs.
“Shut up, I’m serious.  There’s this guy who is supposed to give A+ blow jobs.  And he will blow anyone - gay, straight - he doesn’t care.  If you have a dick, he’ll suck it.”
“You try it?”  
“Nah.  I know they say a mouth is a mouth, but I figured I’d have to picture tits or something to get off and that’s cheating.”
“You can’t cheat at orgasms,” Michael protests.  “Anyway, sounds like an urban legend.  The boogeyman and the blow job fairy.”
“I am not making him up,” Chris glares at Michael and snatched the joint out of his hand.  “You know Conner, Miguel’s boyfriend?”
“Yeah.”  He and Chris had some seminar with Miguel last year, and Michael vaguely remembers his boyfriend.  
“Swears he was straight until this guy blew him.  I heard Miguel sent him a fruit basket after they got together.”
“Now I know you’re making this up.  No blow job is that good.”  Michael holds up his hand when Chris starts to protest.  “Prove it, call him right now.”
Chris visibly deflates.  “I don’t actually have his number or know his name.”
Michael shakes his head in mock disappointment. “You owe me apology wings for getting my hopes up.”
Chris rolls his eyes, but picks up his phone.  “Fine.”
A few weeks later, Chris runs up to Michael at a party, knocking two drinks over in his haste to reach him.  “He’s here,” he says as he grabs Michael’s arm.
“Who?” Michael asks.  He looks around, but doesn’t see anyone following Chris.
“The guy, you know,” Chris makes an obscene gesture Michael immediately recognizes.  “I told you he was real!”
“He’s not fucking Santa Claus,” Michael rolls his eyes.
Chris pauses and blinks, “I mean he might, but forget that.  I hooked you up.  In ten minutes go to the upstairs bathroom, third door on the left.” “You’re an idiot.”
“I’m the idiot who is getting you laid.”  Chris holds out his hand for a fist bump.  “You are going to owe me so much beer.”
“Whatever,” Michael shoves at Chris’s shoulder, but he just dances away and joins a game of beer pong.
Michael is sure Chris is full of shit, and he intends to forget they ever had such a stupid conversation.  But nine minutes later, he finds himself climbing the stairs and trying to ignore the way Chris cheers and winks at him as he goes by.
He sees someone leaning against the wall by the third door.  They’re looking at their phone so he can’t see their face, but he likes what he can see - long legs in tight black jeans, big hands with fingers moving quickly over the screen, dark spiked hair, small gold hoop in his ear.
“Hey,” Michael says as he approaches.  Whatever hope he had of seeming cool goes up in smoke as soon as the guy looks up.  “Alex?  Alex Manes?” he sputters.
The smirk that was on Alex’s face turns into a frown, and before Michael can react, Alex moves away from the wall and pushes Michael up against the door.  “Is this some kind of joke?” he spits out.  “You want to go back to Roswell and brag about how you got the resident queer on his knees?  Well, jokes on you, I don’t care what you or anyone else says about me.  You can’t shame me, Guerin.”
“What? No!  That’s not what, I mean I wouldn’t,” Michael trips over his words as he tries to reassure Alex.  He doesn't blame him for jumping to conclusions - Roswell hadn’t been kind to Alex.  Michael doesn’t remember Alex ever saying he was gay, but everyone talked about it like it was a fact.  The football team harassed him daily about it, making it clear that anyone who dressed like that, who had multiple piercings, must be gay.  He and Alex never had any classes together, and Michael was too busy trying to fly under the radar and get the grades he needed for a scholarship, to talk to anyone outside Max and Isobel.
“So why are you here?” Alex continues to glare at Michael.
“Umm, this is kind of embarrassing,” Michael admits.  He blushes when Alex raises one brow and waits for him to continue.  “My roommate sent me up here for, you know,” Michael gestures at his dick and winces at how ridiculous he must sound.  “I didn’t even know it was you.”
Alex takes a step back and gives Michael enough room to take a deep breath.  He very obviously looks Michael over before asking, “And know that you do know it’s me?”
It takes Michael longer than it should to realize the blow job is still on the table.  He’s not really sure what kind of response Alex is looking for.  He’s tempted to tell him he’s even hotter than he was in high school.  Michael’s pretty sure he’s added a tongue piercing to the earring and nose ring, and Michael’s discovering he really likes the eyeliner.  But doesn’t think bringing up high school is a good idea so he blurts out, “I won’t tell anyone.”
“Whatever,” Alex rolls his eyes and pushes Michael aside to open the bathroom door.  “Come on,” he pulls Michael inside when Michael doesn’t react, and locks the door behind him.  “Condoms are mandatory, you can touch my hair, but not my neck.  I’d prefer you keep your mouth shut, but if you have to talk, no ordering me around.”
Michael nods, he’s not sure starting off with a lecture is very sexy, but if what Chris said is true, Alex must have a routine.  Alex crowds him against the wall and runs his index finger up Michael zipper before unbuttoning his jeans.  He leans close and whispers, “I don’t have a gag reflex so don’t worry about being polite.”
Alex’s breath is warmth against his ear and while he’s slowly working Michael’s zipper open, Michael reconsiders just how sexy a lecture can be.  Alex drops to his knees and pulls Michael’s pants down past his knees.  Michael sucks in breath when he sees Alex looking up at him, gaze steady as he slides the condom on.  “Ready?” he asks.
And if Michael liked Alex’s breath on his neck, it’s nothing compared to how it feels on his dick.  Alex hasn’t really touched him, and he’s already getting hard.  “Yeah,” he finally says once he realizes Alex is waiting for an answer.
“Good,” Alex winks before taking the head of Michael’s dick into his mouth.  
Alex closes his eyes, and Michael wishes for a second he’d kept them open before Alex does something with his tongue that leaves him gasping for air.  Michael has had his fair share of blow jobs, but nothing like this.  He can’t even say exactly what Alex does that is so special.  The tongue piercing helps, and Alex clearly knows how to use it.  
But if pressed, Michael would say it’s the way Alex seems almost devoted to what he is doing.  He keeps his eyes closed, and he seems almost as blissed out as Michael feels.  No one has ever taken their time, or savored the experience, quite like Alex does.  He starts by taking Michael deeper into his mouth inch by inch, licking and sucking as he goes.  By the time he takes Michael as deep as he can, Michael is red faced and panting and ready to come.
Then he stops moving, just holds Michael’s dick in his mouth.  Michael must whine or something because Alex pulls off and laughs.  He starts with just the head of his dick again, taking him in just as slowly, but playing with his balls this time.  When he stops again, Michael groans, “Alex, please.”
“Once more, ok,” Alex tells him.
Michael is honestly shocked he doesn’t come as soon as Alex’s lips touch his dick again, but he doesn’t. Alex goes even slower this time, lavishing attention on every inch of Michael he takes into his mouth like they have all the time in the world.  He takes Michael deeper this time, so deep Michael doesn’t even know how he can breathe.  Michael watches Alex’s face and silently begs him not to stop again.
He unclenches his fists and drops them to Alex’s hair, gently holding him in place.  Alex makes a pleased sound and swallows around Michael’s dick while pressing hard against the skin behind his balls, making Michael come harder than he thinks he’s ever come before.
Alex doesn’t back off, sucks gently at Michael’s dick until he’s done and sensitive enough to push Alex back.  Once Alex takes off the condom and walks to the sink to wash his hands, Michael slides down the wall and tries to catch his breath.
“See you round, Guerin,”  Alex walks toward the door, giving Michael a judgemental look on his way out.  “I wouldn’t sit on that floor for long if I were you.”
Michael half-heartedly flips him off.  Sure, he should have pulled his pants back up before sitting down, but he still can’t feel his legs. He’ll get up in a minute, he promises himself, just as soon as he decides who gets the bigger fruit basket - Chris or Alex.
Michael doesn’t see Alex again until an end of semester party.  He’s walking down the hall when some guy stumbles out of a bathroom right into him.  The stunned look on his face and the way he can barely string the syllables together to apologize make him wonder just how high he is.  Then he sees Alex come out of the same room, a satisfied smirk on his face, and it all makes sense.
Over the last few months, Michael had convinced himself that Alex was as hot or as skilled as he remembered.  One look at him now, and Michael knew he hadn’t been exaggerating.  Alex was gorgeous, in all black again, but this time his lips were red and shiny.  It hit Michael all at once exactly why Alex looked like that and he went from pleasantly buzzed to desperately turned on in a second.
“Guerin,” Alex nods at him.
Michael knows he should respond, but all he can do is stare at Alex’s mouth and lick his own lips.
Alex watched him before laughing and jerking his head toward the open bathroom.  “You want another go at it.”
More than anything, but Michael had assumed it was a one and done kind of thing.  He didn’t even let himself imagine it happening again.  “Is that allowed?” he finally blurts out.
“Don’t be a dumbass,” Alex rolls his eyes.  He walks into the bathroom, leaving the door open behind him.
Michael follows quickly, not wanting anyone to get between them.  He has his pants down before Alex finishes locking the door.
Alex takes in his already hard cock, and drops to his knees.  “Eager aren’t we?” he teases as he rolls the condom on.
Michael doesn’t say anything, just tangles his hand in Alex’s hair and pulls him forward.  He prepares himself for slow and thorough, but Alex surprises him by taking him deep right away.  
Alex doesn’t close his eyes this time, just looks up at Michael as he sucks his cock.  It’s fast and messy, and if Michael didn’t know Alex had just done this - just done it with someone else - he’d swear Alex was as desperate for it as he is.  Alex carefully scrapes his teeth along his dick as he slides his mouth down, then takes him deep again before pressing his piercing along the underside of his dick.
He can’t stop staring at Alex’s lips stretched around his cock, and he’s trying so hard not to move he’s barely breathing.  When Alex lets his cock slip from his mouth, Michael bangs his fist against the wall.
“I told you not to be polite,” Alex reminds him.  He grabs Michael’s ass and tugs.
And, yeah, Michael can work with that.  He waits until Alex squeezes his ass again to be sure he’s ready, and he thrusts carefully into Alex’s mouth.  Alex moans around him and urges him to go faster, harder.  Alex is still watching him, but Michael has to close his eyes.  All he can hear is the sound of his dick moving in and out of Alex’s mouth.  Alex moans again, and Michael thrusts even deeper and comes.
Pride keeps him on his feet, and he manages to get his pants back up while Alex disposes of the condom and washes his hands.    “So repeats are a thing,” Michael says, wincing as soon as the words are out of his mouth.
Alex dries his hands and looks at Michael like he’s an idiot - Michael is becoming worryingly fond of that look.  “I’m not Prince Charming working my way through campus looking for the perfect dick.  I do this when I want and with whoever I want.  You have a nice dick, and you don’t use it to try and prove you’re better than me, so,” Alex shrugs and smiles.
Michael can’t decide if he should preen over the compliment or find everyone who treated Alex like shit and punch them in the face.  He blames his conflicting desires for what he says next.  “I’m heading back to Roswell on Sunday if you need a ride or anything.”
Even sex drunk, Michael knows immediately he fucked up.  Alex goes completely still, and while he’s still smiling, every bit of emotion is gone from his face.  “The only time I will ever step foot back in the hellhole is to spit on my father’s grave.”
He’s out the door before Michael can think of a response.  
Michael tries not to think about Alex - especially his fuck up with Alex - once he’s back in Roswell.  He has a room in the Evans’ basement now, and he spends the first few weeks sleeping in and catching up with Max and Isobel.  They’d hit a rough patch just before graduation when Isobel started having migraines so bad she blacked out.  Michael had stayed close to her all summer while Max went on his road trip with Liz Ortecho then Max returned just in time for Michael to leave for college.
Just to be safe, Max and Isobel had both taken the year off after graduation.  Things were better by Christmas, and they were all on solid ground by the time Michael came home for the summer.  Max had gone on another road trip with Liz before starting online classes for Creative Writing and Literature.  Isobel decided not to go to school, but was working as a waitress at the country club.  When Michael questioned her choice, she’d ticked off her reasons matter of factly.
“The tips are phenomenal, Mom and Dad have enough clout that even the creepy members keep their hands to themselves, and I am making all the right connections.”
“For what?”  Michael asked.
“You’ll see,” Isobel had replied with a gleam in her eye that had Michael thinking he’d come back one day to find Isobel was the youngest mayor in Roswell history.
Everyone is in a more  festive mood this year, even though Isobel is pretty busy before the holidays, and Max is moping because Liz decided to spend her break in LA with Rosa instead of coming home.  Mrs. Evans bribes them with extra cookies if they’ll hang the Christmas lights,and Michael knows it, he’s opening presents and stuffing himself on the enchiladas Mr. Ortecho brings to Christmas brunch.
He sees Jesse Manes a few days after Christmas.  He’s walking through town in his uniform, and Michael realizes he’s never seen him out of uniform.  Maybe that’s why Alex hates him so much.  The military is still pretty conservative, and he can see how the whole gay thing would have been an issue for someone whose whole identity seems to be about his service.
After that, Michael can’t stop thinking about Alex.  He tries to remember if they ever talked in school, and he can’t think of one time he even said hello to Alex.  Michael wants to know why he hates Roswell, he wants to know what makes Alex laugh.  He wants to know what kind of apology he’s most likely to accept, he knows Alex isn’t the type to just let things go.  Michael remembers the way he looked at Kyle Valenti after Kyle became the world’s biggest douche - Alex can hold a grudge, especially when it’s justified.
The problem is, Alex was just as much of a loner as Michael was so there is no one to ask.  He only ever saw Alex with Liz and Maria DeLuca.  Liz is out of town, and Michael doesn’t know Maria well enough to just start asking questions about Alex.  He almost asks Isobel what she remembers about Alex, but high school is still a touchy subject for her so he resigns himself to learning nothing.
The day before he heads back to school, he’s waiting for Max at the Crashdown when Mimi DeLuca stops by his table.  Max told him that there are rumors about Mimi losing her mind.  He says the cops have picked her up a few times wandering around at night, talking nonsense.  She seems fine to Michael - still young and pretty enough to be the cool mom, and kind enough to be approachable.
“Michael,” she greets him with a smile even though they barely know each other.  “Would you do me a favor and please say hi to Alex for us.”
“Umm, sure.”  Michael can’t really tell her he doesn’t think Alex will talk to him again.  And it’s not like what they were doing involved much talking in the first place.
Mimi leans down and pats him on the arm.  “Just be patient with him.  He’s never had much kindness in his life.  I know that’s something you understand.”
Normally Miche would get defensive, but he can tell she doesn’t mean it as an insult, just a way to connect him to Alex which is what he’s been looking for.  “Thanks,” he tells her with his own smile, even though he’s not sure what she means.  Alex didn’t grow up alone with at best neglectful and too often violent foster families.  But then he pictures Jesse Manes striding through town in his uniform and wonders.
Michael doesn’t understand how he went over a year without knowing Alex was at UNM because once he’s back on campus in January, he sees Alex everywhere.  Well, not really everywhere, but he catches a glimpses of him across the quad and then he’s walking into Michael’s favorite coffee shop just a few minutes after Michael leaves.  The third time he’s working the circulation desk at the library when Michael is killing time between classes, he decides to stop pretending he doesn’t want to talk to him.
“Hey,” he says when he approaches the desk.  Alex just stares him down, waiting for Michael to say something else, and God, Michael really missed the judgemental way Alex looks at him.
Michael’s about to walk away and give Alex the win in their staring contest when he thinks of something to say.  “Is this your first year here?”
“No,” Alex says slowly, his expression shifting to confused as well as judgemental.  “I’m a sophomore just like you.  We graduated together, remember?”
“Yeah, I know, it’s just how did I never see you before?”
“Big campus,” Alex shrugs.
“Big campus,” Michael repeats.  He shoves his hands in his pockets and rocks back on his heels.  This whole exchange is excruciating, and if it wasn’t negative a hundred outside, he’d wait out the half hour before his next class on a bench or something.
Alex sighs and takes pity on him.  “My break is in ten minutes.  There’s a gender neutral bathroom with a lock at the end of that hallway.”
Michael looks in the direction Alex is pointing at and nods before heading back to the table he was pretending to study at.  This isn’t what he expected when he approached Alex, but he’s not about to let the opportunity pass. Ten minutes drag on, and as soon as Michael sees Alex leave the desk he gets up to follow.
Alex locks the door and walks toward Michael until he’s backed up against the wall.  He takes his time undoing Michael’s belt and unzipping his jeans.  By the time he’s done, Michael’s well on his way to hard.  And even with the latex between them, the feel of Alex’s fingers sliding the condom up his dick has him shivering.
Without the background noise of a party, everything feels more intentional and intense.  When Alex takes the head of his dick in his mouth, Michael can hear the sound he makes when he starts to suck.  “Oh,” Michael says when Alex takes him deeper.  He closes his eyes and thumps his head against the wall.  Alex is getting louder, and if Michael has to hear him and look at him, this isn’t going to last, and he wants it to.
Alex shifts higher in his knees, he stops sucking for a minute, just holds Michael in his mouth.  Then Michael hears the sound of another zipper, and he knows it’s not his, which means it must be Alex, and that means Alex is touching himself while he sucks Michael off.
Michael opens his eyes, but he can’t really see what Alex is doing.  But he can hear him, can hear the sound of Alex’s hand moving while he jerks himself off.  Alex is licking Michael’s dick again, pressing the piercing against the head the way Michael likes before sucking him down.  He moans when Michael is deep in his mouth, and Michael doesn’t know if it’s from sucking Michael off or his own hand, but it doesn’t matter because as soon as he hears it, Michael snaps his hips forward - harder than he meant to - and comes.
Alex pulls off as soon as Michael is done, and Michael would be annoyed, but he can still hear Alex’s hand moving, faster and faster, until it stops and Alean moans - deeper and louder than before.
Michael knows he must look ridiculous - face red and condom hanging off his dick.  Especially since by the time Alex stands up, his pants are done up, and he looks perfectly composed - not all like he just jerked off during his break.  Michael throws the condom away and wipes up with a paper towel while Alex washes his hands.  “I didn’t know you did that,” Michael says, gesturing toward Alex’s zipper.
Alex raises one brow at him and purses his lips like he’s trying not to laugh.  “I do, just not every time.”
“You’ve never with me before,” Michael says, not sure why he’s pushing this.
“You’ve never been my first of the night before.  Is it a problem?”
Alex’s expression starts to close off, and Michael rushes to correct him before he fucks up again.  “No, I’m just glad you’re enjoying yourself.”
“That’s kind of the point, Guerin,” Alex shakes his head and walks off.
Michael waits a few minutes before heading back to his table and pretending to study.  He waves at Alex on his way out, and Aex rolls his eyes, but waves too so Michael takes it as a win.
Alex doesn’t blow him every time he sees him in the library, not even weekly, and he doesn’t jerk off every time either, but it’s still the most regular sex Michael has ever gotten.  He’s not sure if people can tell he’s getting laid or if he’s just more confident, but he’s hooked up with someone at almost every party he’s been to as well.  Even Chris notices.
“What’s going on with you, man?  You’re really crushing it with the ladies right now,” he says as they stumble their way back to the dorm after some frat party.
“I’m just that sexy,” Michael slurs with a laugh. 
“If I didn’t just see you with two different girls this week, I’d swear you had a girlfriend, or boyfriend,” he adds on.  “You weren’t even this well fucked when you dated Katie.”
“Just a run of good luck and my irresistible charm,” Michael insists.  
Chris laughs so hard he falls into a bush.  Michael helps him up and somehow they make it back to their room without any injuries.
Michael thinks about it the next time he sees Alex.  He’s had more sex with Alex than anyone he’s ever dated,and he doesn’t know anything about him, except they went to high together and Alex hates Roswell.  It makes him feel guilty, like he’s using Alex, and Michael knows he is using Alex, that Alex expects it of him, but he doesn’t like thinking of it that way.
“What’s your major,” he asks Alex the next time they hook up.
Alex just looks at Michael for a minute before finally answering.  “Computer Science and Music Theory and Composition.”
“Huh,” Michael responds.  Alex looks like a music major with the whole emo thing he had going, but Michael has a hard time picturing him sitting in front of a computer for hours.
When Michael doesn’t say anything else, Alex sighs and asks, “What about you?”
“Mechanical and environmental engineering.”
Alex narrows his eyes and studies Michael before saying anything.  “Suits you.”
He’s gone before Michael can decide if that was a compliment or not.
A week later,  Michael follows Alex out of the bathroom and catches him while he’s still in the hallway. “Do you like working here, the library I mean?”
Alex turns back and leans against the wall.  “It’s easy, quiet.  I make better money and tips at The Grind.”
“You work at the Grind?  I’m there all the time, how have I never seen you there?”  Michael’s starting to feel like the universe is conspiring to keep him away from Alex.
“I work the early shift, five to nine am.  They pay more since most college students don’t like mornings, and the first few hours are pretty dead.”
Michael makes a face at the thought of working that early.  “Yeah, the only way I’m up at five is if I haven’t gone to bed.”
“I don’t sleep much so it’s not a big deal,” Alex shrugs.  “You work on campus?”  Alex asks before Michael can follow up on the comment about not sleeping.
“No, I work at an auto shop off campus a few days a week.  Pays not bad, and I get free tune ups which my poor truck desperately needs.”
Alex laughs.  “Is that why your hands?”  Alex holds up his own hands.
Michael looks down.  He’s used to the permanent grease stains around his nails, doesn’t really think about them much anymore.  He used to be embarrassed, but Alex seems more curious than critical so he doesn’t get defensive.  “Occupational hazard.  Even if I wasn’t working there, I’m always tinkering with something.”
“Life of an engineer,” Alex laughs again.  “Well, I should get back,” Alex points back toward the desk and walks away.
Michael thinks it might be their new found rapport, but the next time Alex sucks him off, he comes so hard he thinks he might have an aneurysm.  Whatever Alex did with his tongue is superhuman, and he means to ask him about it, but what he says insead is, “Why weren’t you at graduation?”
Alex doesn’t answer, just storms out of the bathroom without checking to see if Michael is decent.
“Fuck,” Michael exhales as soon as the door closes.  He really fucked it up this time.
Alex won’t even look at him for the next two weeks, and then he’s suddenly gone - never at the library the same time as Michael.  If Alex changed his shift or even quit just to avoid Michael, he must be more upset than Michael realizes.  He thinks about showing up at The Grind to apologize, but that seems a little too much like stalking especially since he told Alex he’s never up that early.
Michael still looks for Alex around campus, and when he can’t seem to find him he sulks.  He studies more than normal, and when Chris convinces him to go out, he gets drunk and fucks around with any girl he knows is only looking for a good time no strings attached.  It’s never the same girl twice - if he learned anything from Alex it’s that he gets attached way too easily.
He sulks all the way through midterms before Chris decides it’s been long enough.  “I know it sucks to get dumped, but it can’t be this bad,” he tells Michael when he finds him hiding in his bed one afternoon.
“I wasn’t dumped.  I wasn’t even dating anyone,” Michael protests.
“Then what’s with the pouting and the half hearted hook ups?  Looks like a broken heart to me.”
“There is no broken heart,” Michael insists.  “I had a thing, ok.  Like a casual acquaintances with benefits thing for a while, but it ended.”
“Did she fall in love with you?”  Chris gasps, “No, you fell in love with her.  Michael, that really sucks.”
“No one fell in love.  I just said something stupid and pissed him off.  Story of my life.”
Chris frowns.  “Don’t be so hard on yourself.  You just need to get back out there.  Fuck another guy instead of just girls and forget about him.  Hey, I could find the blow job guy for you again.”
“No!”  Michael can’t imagine anything more embarrassing.
“Are you sure?  Dane from my physics class hooked up with him last month and said he thinks he saw Jesus when he came.  And Grant said the blow jobs he got from him this semester are the best he’s ever had.  He actually has an alert on his phone so if someone spots him at a party he gets notified and can show up.”
No, seriously, no,” Michael cuts Chris off.  
“Fine, but the swim team is having a party tomorrow, and you’re coming with me.  We’ll find some hot guy to get you out of your slump.”
“There’s no slump.  And since when do we have a swim team?”
Michael learns two things about swimmers Saturday night - they like the music loud, they are very comfortable hanging out half dressed.  Two drinks in he wanders upstairs and tries to decide if he wants to hook up or just get stone drunk.
He walks past a half open door when he hears it.  Some guy yelling, “Come on, come on, just like that.  Give it to me,” between breathy moans.  Michael moves to close the door, because  no one needs to hear that.
Michael has to come closer than he’d like to reach the door handle, and that’s when he sees him.  Alex is on his knees, some red headed kid up against the wall getting his dick sucked.  He plans to shut the door, he really does, but he’s never seen Alex like this.  Never seen just how his lips look stretched around a dick from this angle, never saw the stretch of Alex’s neck or the way he can see his tongue moving.  Alex’s face is almost expressionless, and Michael can’t tell if he’s okay, but when he looks down, he sees Alex is hard.
The guy’s getting louder, and Michael remembers what Alex said about keeping his mouth shut. He’s not ordering Alex around exactly, but his tone is more demanding than begging and it’s starting to piss Michael off. Michael takes another step forward when he hears Alex make a noise.  He moans and shifts a little and that’s when Michael remembers he’s hard, Alex is hard, but he’s not touching himself because he’s using both arms to hold this douche bag still.  
Michael closes the door behind him and comes up behind Alex.  He drops to his knees,and places his hand on Alex’s shoulder.  Alex freezes.  “It’s me, Guerin,” Michael whispers.  Alex doesn’t respond but he relaxes.  
Michael drops his other hand to Alex’s hip then slides it around to rest at the top of his jeans.  He wants to touch, he’s already hard just thinking about it, but he needs Alex’s permission. “Can I,” he asks.  “Is it ok if I touch you.”
Alex moans and his hips jerk against Michael’s hand, and he takes that as a yes.  It takes both his hands and a bit of fumbling for him to get Alex’s pants undone from this angle.  Once he gets them down, he can’t wait to get Alex’s dick in his hands.  He’s hot and hard and slick already and feels perfect in Michael’s hand.
“Thank you,” he whispers against Alex’s ear.  He wants to take his time, wants to get Alex close a few times before he lets him come.  But he can tell the idiot Alex is sucking off is getting close, and he wants Alex to finish first.  Doesn’t want anyone else to see him like this.
He tightens his hand around Alex’s dick and let’s him thrust into it.  Michael uses his other hand to cup Alex’s balls, he wants to take them in his mouth and suck on them but this will have to do for now.  He strokes the skin behind them, making Alex moan again.  When he feels Alex’s hips stutter, he loosens his grip and toys with the crown until he comes.
Michael manages to get Alex’s pants back up and mostly fastened even though he’s distracted by watching the way Alex’s cheeks hollow as he finishes the guy off.  Michael’s breathing almost as heavily as he is, and he wants so badly to grind into Alex from behind, but he knows he’ll come in his pants if he does so he keeps a small distance between them.
The asshole shouts when he comes, and brings his knee up, almost catching Alex in the face.  He glares when he spots Michael.  “Wait your turn like everyone else,” he complains. 
“Maybe learn to shut a door,” Michael chastises him.
“Whatever,” he rolls his eyes at Michael.  “If watching me get off is what gets you all hot and bothered, you can blow me later.”
“Dick,” Michael grumbles as he leaves.  At least this time he remembered to shut the door..
He hears Alex laugh, feels him move away.  When he looks back over, Alex has turned to sit leaning against the wall.  He’s flushed and beautiful, and Michael wants him.  “Can I kiss you?” he blurts out.  “Do you do that?”
Alex rolls his eyes.  “This isn’t Pretty Woman, Guerin.  Come here.”
He holds out his hand, and Michael takes it, letting Alex pull him closer.  He means to sit next to him, but somehow he ends up in Alex’s lap.  Michael’s careful, tentative - first kisses are always awkward.  But Alex threads his fingers through the curls on the back of Michael’s head and tugs him forward.  He kisses like he sucks cock, intent and focused.  When he drags his tongue piercing along the roof of Michael’s mouth, Michael moans and thrusts his hips against Alex.
Alex taps his leg, “Stand up and I’ll take care of that for you.”
“No,” Michael says forcefully enough that Alex leans back and raises his brows.  “Just your hand,” he clarifies.  “That’s enough.”
“Ok,”Alex shrugs.  He pulls a small bottle of lube out of his front pocket while Michael shimmys his pants down to his knees.  
He ends up kneeling next to Alex, and the angle is a little awkward, but he can keep kissing Alex so he doesn’t care.  The first touch of Alex’s hand is cool and slick, and it takes some of the urgency away. Alex strokes him gently at first - fingers exploring, teasing.  He kisses Michael the same way- tongue dancing in and out of his mouth.  Michael whines, reaches for his dick with his own hand, but Alex pushes it away.
Thankfully, Alex takes the hint.  He tightens his grip and strokes Michael firmly,  He deepens the kiss, sucking on Michael’s tongue as Michael thrusts into his first.  Michael moves higher up on his knees, chasing every bit of contact he can get.  It all feels so good, then Alex bites at his lower lip and Michael comes with a gasp.
Alex wipes his hands on the carpet and makes a face.  “This is why I prefer bathrooms.  I could really use a sink right now.”
Michael looks around and realizes for the first time that they are in some kind of office or study room.  He sits down next to Alex and tries to catch his breath.  “You don’t have any hand sanitizer in your pocket?” He jokes.  “You have everything else you need.”
Instead of laughing, Alex looks like he’s considering the idea.  “I might have to start doing that.”
He starts to get up, but Michael stops him with a hand on his arm.  “Hey, I’m sorry about before.  It was none of my business.”
“It’s fine,” Alex brushes him off, but doesn’t get up.  “I just don’t like talking about”
“Anything personal,” Michael fills in when Alex seems lost for words.
“Pretty much,” Alex agrees with a smile.
“Still, I”m sorry, and I hope you can get your shift back.”
“What?”  Alex blinks at him, clearly confused.
“At the library.  You don’t have to avoid me,”  Michael feels really bad about that.
“You think I quit the library to avoid you?”  Alex laughs.  “I’m not fragile, Jesus.  Most of their budget is for work study and since I don’t qualify, they can only give me so many hours.  They just ran out of funding for the year.”
“That sucks.”
“Nothing I can do about it. I picked up another tutoring job, and they’ll bring me back for the summer.”
Michael has a lot of questions, but he settles on one he hopes is safe.  “You stay here over the summer?”
“No where else to go,” Alex shrugs.  He keeps talking before Michael can apologize again.  “It’s not bad.  Between the library and the coffee shop, I can work a ton of hours, and if I have enough saved I can take a few online summer classes.”
There’s a commotion outside the door - sounds like someone started some kind of drunken relay race.  Alex makes a face and stands up. “I’ve had enough of people for one day.  See you around, Guerin.”
He’s out the door before Michael can do more than wave in acknowledgment.
Michael doesn’t see Alex around, not for weeks, even though he’s looking.  He still can’t bring himself to show up at The Grind when he knows Alex is working even though he wants to.  Would Alex kiss him again, would he let Michael touch him?  It feels like something changed between them, and Alex vanishes just when Michael wants to see what it means.
The weekend before finals, Chris insists they need to go to Francesco’s for dollar beer night.  Despite the name, Francesco’s is a typical college dive bar - no one looks too hard at IDs and in return no one complains about the watered down beer.
Michael can hear the music before they even get to the door, and he remembers seeing some flyers around campus about a band night.  “If the music sucks, I’m out,” he tells Chris.
“Don’t be a snob.  No one comes here for the music.”
Chris pulls him through the door, and Michael comes to a complete stop when he sees the stage.  Alex is up there -  singing.  He’s added a black leather jacket to his normal black jeans and Tshirt.  His hair is spiked to razor points, eyeliner perfectly defined and his lips are red and shining like he just got done sucking cock.  Michael can’t breathe.
He lets Chris drag him to the bar.  But as soon as he has a beer, he’s pushing his way toward the stage, not checking or caring to see if Chris follows.  Most people are crowded around the bar, staying within easy access to cheap beer, so he finds an open table just to the right of the stage.
Michael sits down and doesn’t bother to pretend he’s doing anything other than staring at Alex.  Up close he can see the studded collar he has around his neck, the silver bracelets slipping down past the cuff of jacket, and the black polish on his nails.  
It’s hot outside, even for May, and inside the bar it’s worse.  Michael finishes his beer quickly, he’d get another but that would mean getting up and looking away from Alex.  Instead he unbuttons the top half of the buttons on his shirt, pulls the fabric from his chest to get some air circulation.  Alex keeps singing, doesn’t acknowledge Michael in any way, but Michael knows he’s watching.  It makes him want to show off, keep Alex’s attention, so when he lets his shirt settle, he makes sure it falls to the side so one of his nipples is showing.  Michael can see the amusement and desire in Alex’s eyes.
Alex’s band is good - they stick to well known emo cover songs.  But Alex’s voice is the real star.  It’s deep and sexy and, like everything else about Alex, goes straight to Michael’s dick.  He’s so hard it’s all he can do not to touch himself right there. Michael knows he would do it too if he thought Alex could see.  
Michael’s both relieved and disappointed when Alex announces their last song.  On one hand he could watch Alex sing forever, but if Alex gets off the stage, Michael might be able to do more than watch.  He can see the next band waiting on the other side of the stage as they launch into American Idiot.  Alex is mesmerizing.  Even the noise of the bar quiets some as more people stop to watch and listen.
Alex turns so he’s looking directly at Michael as he sings.  When he gets to the line “Well, maybe I’m the faggot, America,” a chorus of cheers goes up across the bar.   He winks at Michael and raises his middle finger toward the audience, smiling when some people respond in kind.
Michael can’t take any more of this. He's waiting at the edge of the stage before the song is even over.  As soon as Alex gets off the stage, Michael grabs him by the arm and pulls him into the handicapped bathroom, quickly locking the door behind them.
“I’m going to kiss you right now, ok?”  He barely gives Alex time to nod before his mouth is on his.  Michael isn’t interested in gentle or finesse, he shoves his tongues into Alex’s mouth, rubs it around his piercing.  He can't’ help thrusting against Alex, groaning when he feels Alex is hard too.
“That turn you on,” he pants, pulling his mouth away with effort.  “Singing in front of all those people make you hard?”
“You make me hard,” Alex tells him.  He slips his hand into Michael’s open shirt, rolling his nipple between his fingers, making Michael gasp.  “Showing off, staring at me like you wanted to jump me right there on the stage.”
“I did, I would have if I didn’t think someone would stop us,” Michael confesses.  He takes a breath and decides to go for it, ask Alex for what he wants.  “Can I fuck you?  Please.”
Alex’s eyes widen, but he nods and pulls a condom and lube out of his pocket and hands it to Michael.
“Always prepared,” Michael laughs.  He sets them on the edge of the sink then freezes when he sees Alex shoving his pants down.  He braces himself against the wall, ass out toward Michael.  “God,’ he breathes.  Michael reaches out and strokes the smooth, firm skin of Alex��s ass.  He’s magnificent.  He squeezes, kneads the muscles under his hand.
Alex moans, and Michael wishes he could take his time.  He wants to touch and look,  to lick and bite before he fucks him.  But they’re in a public restroom on borrowed time.  He gets his own pants down past his knees and puts the condom on.  Once his fingers are coated with lube, he slips them between Alex’s cheeks.  Michael spreads the lube up and down the crease of Alex’s ass, getting more lube when Alex presses back against his hand.
They both groan when he pushes his first finger into Alex.  It’s been awhile since he’s done this to someone else, and he’s not sure how slow he needs to go.  Alex isn’t fighting him though, he’s moving with Michael, and Michael adds a second finger.
“Like that,” Alex encourages him.  “Deeper.”
Michael fucks Alex with his fingers, twisting and spreading them to open Alex up faster.  He rests his head against Alex’s back, the scent of leather from his jacket surrounding him.  He wants his mouth on Alex, but he remembers what Alex said about not touching his neck so instead he brings two fingers from his other hand to Alex’s mouth.
He presses his fingers to Alex's lips, moaning when Alex sucks them into his mouth.  “Your fucking mouth,” he moans.  “Your lips were so red and full, like you’d been sucking cock for hours.  Is that what you did?  Did you blow the band before you took the stage.”
Alex laughs and lets Michael fingers slip from his mouth.  “Lip plumping gloss.  But I like the way your mind works.”
“If we had more time, I’d ask you to suck me off after I fucked you,” Michael tells him just as he adds a third finger.  
“Next time,” Alex promises as he pushes back into Michael’s hand.  “Now get on with it and fuck me.”
Michael pulls his fingers out and hastily spreads some lube over the condom.  He holds Alex’s hips still and pushes in as slow as he can.  Alex is hot and tight and perfect around him.  He wants to stay there forever.
“Move,” Alex demands.
Michael can hear Alex jerking himself off and he can’t hold back anymore.  They move together, Michael fucking him hard and fast, trying to match the pace of Alex’s hand on his own dick.  He comes a minute before Alex, feels Alex clench down on him when his own orgasm hits.
They wash their hands together in the sink,and Alex kisses him one more time before leaving.  A quick, almost chaste kiss.  “Have a nice summer, Michael,” he adds as he leaves.
Michael doesn’t see him when he makes his way back to the bar.  He lets Chris buy him a few more beers before they head out and hit up another party.  Alex isn’t there either so Michael lets the crowd and the drinks distract him from the thought of a long summer without seeing Alex again.
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pretty-little--puppy · 5 months
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Ok this is a genuine post and if someone would explain it to me that would be great.
I don't get why sex is such an emotionally loaded thing? Like, I see it as just another activity, like a sport. And I understand that that isn't how most people see it but if I trust you enough to see me naked then I don't have an issue having sex. But when I try to explain that to anyone they always get really weird. Then if I ever bring up fwb (which is a relationship type I've had and currently have and works so well for me) people always argue that people catch feelings and that they never work out in the long run?!?!?!?! Like wtf, why? I trust and respect my friends and I hope they feel the same so if we want to why not? Why does it have to be this taboo thing to have casual sex with friends?
I'm genuinely curious and do not meen any disrespect to anyone at all, I'm just trying to understand why.
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nostxlgiax · 4 months
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burning flames (or paradise) | jjk
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title: burning flames (or paradise) | jjk (18+)
pairing: jeon jungkook x eader
genre: angst, drama, smut
word count: 1.8k
status: complete
synopsis: reader's never killed a man, until of course, she does.
warnings: unprotected sex, minor injuries, stalking, paranoid, implied self harm, readera and yoongi had a thing, minor character death
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“do you know how to use a knife?” 
she sees him through the fogged mirror.
her face is freshly washed, body shaven, and soft as silk. 
“i chop my vegetables as good as the next girl.” 
his hands rest where they always do, tattooed fingers disappearing in brushed knit. 
“i wouldn’t go for the obvious cut,” the knot slowly comes undone. “if i were in your place, i'd want the fucker to bleed out—slow.”
his kiss is cruel.
“good thing you aren’t.” 
© copyright ciani jayde 2024
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unerhoerkt · 7 months
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Adam ist Stammkunde in angesagtesten und verruchsten Club der Stadt. Eintritt nur mit sexy Kleidung, wahlweise kaum existent. Es gibt viele schummerige Ecken, in denen sich die Gäste für alle anderen gut sichtbar vergnügen, aber auch privatere Räumlichkeiten. Wie jeden Freitag sucht Adam nur nach dem brünetten Mann, der ihm seit Wochen nicht aus dem Kopf geht. Er findet ihn, auf allen Vieren, umgeben von anderen Männern, die er abwechselnd oral befriedigt. Ein Anblick, den Adam seit Wochen gewohnt ist und der ihn anmacht. Als könnte der Brünette seine Anwesenheit spüren, findet sein Blick Adams und hält ihn fest, während er den nächsten Schwanz in den Mund nimmt. Adam genießt diesen Anblick, wie der Brünette von den anderen Männer benutzt wird, bis er dem eigenen Druck nicht mehr standhalten kann. Adam reiht sich ein und die anderen Männer kennen bereits das folgende. Mit Adams Auftauchen liegt der Fokus des Brünetten nur noch auf ihm. Adam ist auch der Einzige, der ihn mit in einer der privaten Räumlichkeiten nehmen darf, um ihn dort die restliche Nacht zu nehmen. Adam kennt keinen Namen und hat auch seinen nie verraten. Die beiden funktionieren auch ohne viele Worte und das freitagliche Treffen ist Adam Highlight seit Wochen.
Prompt: Anonymer Sex im Club
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femmefatalevibe · 8 months
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Just wondering,
Do u think women these days want more casual/sexual relationships rather than something longterm or serious?
As one of these women, I can say a lot of it is for two reasons:
Because we can, honestly. For a lot of (even modern) history, women didn't have the academic, professional, and financial opportunities to live without/not need to seek out a long-term romantic partner. Even in the past decade or two when these possibilities existed, there was a LOT of social stigma surrounding women enjoying being single while also valuing sex/sexual relationships (think Samantha Jones and how she was portrayed back in the '90s/early '00s vs. how we perceive/admire her now)
Relationships are a lot of work and, especially in heterosexual relationships, the emotional labor often falls mainly (if not exclusively) on the woman, which can take a toll on your health, professional life, self-esteem, social life/friendships, self-esteem, ability to pursue hobbies, etc.
Desiring or enjoying being in a long-term/serious romantic relationship is an equally valid ideal/choice. With any perception/lifestyle choices surrounding romance/sex/dating, the intention and fulfillment/respect for both parties in any given dynamic should always be the priority.
Hope this helps xx
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After my last relationship ended in January, I decided to take a break from dating and casual sex. Though the break from dating only lasted four months, that is a long time for me, a serial dater and (previously) self proclaimed ‘slut’. I’m still on hiatus from things like dating apps, orgies, and Lex hookups, and I think the whole experience has been really beneficial overall.
My most recent breakup devastated me, in part because it was the first ‘normal’ relationship I’d ever had. I was holding a lot of myself back because I didn’t think I deserved decent treatment, and that was ironically the main reason the relationship ended. The other reason I was devastated was because I got dumped over voice message. That stung enough to push me to change some things.
For context, I’ve been dating since I was about 17, and near continuously for the past 7 years. I haven’t been single longer than a period of a few months and I have been known to engage in certain acts of promiscuity, including a couple of gay orgies and some very straightforward Lex postings (please don’t look into this any further). When I moved to Portland in 2020, I went on masked-and-6-feet-apart dates just about weekly, and after getting the covid vaccines, I really made my way around.
This all may sound like a drawn out brag, but in reality, my more promiscuous behavior was most likely in reaction to some pretty unfortunate trauma, and my habitual dating was a symptom of low self-worth. Reflecting on some of the things I’ve done, I can’t really say that it was all 100% driven by my own desire. I used to be proud of things like going to sex clubs or losing track of how many sexual partners I’ve had, but now I look back and cringe. Was that really me, or was that the hurt in me seeking easy comfort?
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