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chrollohearttags · 11 months

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𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐂𝐨𝐫𝐧𝐞𝐫 • 𝐅𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐋𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞

when you ask your best friend to tag along for an errand run, the day becomes far more fun than intended. An outing filled with laughs, mischief (and a whole lot of flirting) turns into something far more adventurous than either of you expect. With friends like these, who would ever need a lover again?!

content warning and themes: college au, plus size black fem reader, banter and humor, fluff, exhibitionism, mentions of car sex, mentions of alcohol, fingering, handjob, nipple play, slight spit play, him and the reader are super close, lots of sexual tension between them, praise kink (fuck does he exploit it too), slapping, squirting, backshots, pet names, 69, (pretty girl, mama, baby cakes, my love, daddy is used a few times and eren def has a kink for that shit), mutual masturbation, creampie

word count: 8.5K

📝: this lovely commission was requested by @thesilenthill and I have to thank them so much for entrusting this piece to me and letting me have creative control. This was waaay more fun than it should have been but I enjoyed this and I hope that you do as well! 🫶🏾

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Saturday: a day synonymous with fun, relaxation and rest for most. Recharging from the strenuous week. But for (y/n) (l/n), the everyday hustle and bustle of work never ceased. As a full time college student who sold baked goods on the side, you were the epitome of a girl boss. Always making something happen and getting things done all by your lonesome. Still, it didn’t hurt to have some companionship and assistance sometimes..hence why you were sitting at the kitchen table..thick curls atop your head held back by a pink bandana as you looked at the printouts of all your orders splayed out and ready to be dispensed around campus to faculty and students alike. Having spent all morning baking up the sweet treats. You had quite the reputation for your delectable pastries and prompt delivery. So you had to get a move on and get them all out. However, there were a few things that needed to be added prior to that happening so a store run to a few nearby shops was crucial. Walmart for the decorations, Michael’s for the packaging and a bank run for all your earnings. Not too hectic of an expedition but it’d be a whole lot easier and exciting if you had some company while doing so. That’s why you were thrilled when you’d look down to see your phone illuminating and buzzing against the surface, only to see the one person you were hoping would call and you’d never answered a FaceTime faster!

“Good morning, pretty girl! How’s my beautiful best friend doing?”

pearly white teeth and glazed green eyes glared back at you through the screen. That semi-tanned, bare skin glistening underneath the sunlight..probably from a morning run and his long locks tied into its signature style of a half bun and the rest hanging; it was none other than the man you had called your best friend since high school..

“I’m doing great, baby cakes! You’re up before noon, I see. Coach ‘get on your ass again?”

“When isn’t that lil’ sawed off son of a bitch yelling at me? You know the drill sergeant lives to torment the whole team.”

Eren Jaeger: sophomore at St. Maria University, along with yourself and point guard on the men’s basketball team. Here on a full ride athletic scholarship and a total smartass. Always staying in hot water with head coach Ackerman; mostly due in part to his slick mouth and childish antics. Almost always something referring to his height. But he was the best damn player that team had ever gotten. Especially since he led them to a championship with his first year on the team. Needless to say, his spot was solidified. But that wasn’t going to stop his coach from making sure he trained his ass off! Hence why he was up, getting in a morning run. More than likely against his will. But so long as he had his favorite person to chat with, he was good. As per usual, he wasn’t shocked that you answered on the first ring. He knew you were busy doing one thing or another. Hardly ever sleeping, if at all. If it wasn’t some assignment to help maintain that 4.2 GPA or stay atop the dean’s list, you were baking your little behind off and running orders around to the various dorms. You made a pretty good grip and rightfully so, because your cupcakes and cookies were too goddamn good! He would eat himself sick from the freebies you’d give him, hence why he stayed away during the season because he had no restraint. But today, he wanted nothing more than to hang out with his (y/n) and no one else! And not a moment too soon, because you sort of needed his help!

“Well you know you be asking for it, ‘Ren. You can not tell the head coach that he’s fun sized. No wonder that man hates you.” Both of you blurting out into laughter before you could even get the words out. There truly was never a dull moment with this doofus. But that’s what you loved about him, he always kept you entertained. “Anyways! While you’re messing with people...I called to see what you were up to. I’m tryna hang out with my best friend today. Always too busy for lil’ ol’ me. Got her own business and shit now, she doesn’t have time for small fries anymore.” Glaring off into the camera as if he were pouting and making you feel bad. To which you’d only smack your lips and roll your eyes in response. “Oh, you’re so dramatic. Sir, your ass was just here yesterday. Eating all my damn leftover frosting.” “What?! It was good..and I needed to taste test, ‘make sure it wasn’t poisoned.” He truly was a handful when he wanted to be.

“Well I need your help again. Wanna come run some errands with me? I gotta do deliveries today and I need some more packaging stuff to put them in. Unless you don’t have—“

“Say it and I’ll hang up right now. For my favorite girl, imma make time. Now get dressed and I’ll be over there in about an hour.”

it’s always so cute how he got behind you. He would blow off everyone else..bail out on dates, not pick up his phone for his other friends or teammates..but not (y/n). You were the only one he'd drop anything he was doing and come running. Needless to say, it made many of your other female peers despise you and led a lot to believe that the two of you were dating. But it was nothing of the sort. That was your homie and nothing else. You had held each other down since freshman year of high school and never changed up, not once. With no plans to either. Still, it didn’t help either of your cases when you flirted like lovers and even playfully kissed from time to time. Even making the occasional sexual advances toward one another. Or when the two of you would go out clubbing; him with a drink in his hand and the other on your ass as you threw it back on him to Megan or Moneybagg. And with you being a bigger girl, he’d oftentimes get whispers that there’s no way he could handle all of that. That he wasn’t man enough to know what to do with a girl like you. But he did..mounted behind you as he let you twerk on him. He’d keep that stupid grin on his face all the way until the next day, thinking about it too! Regardless, you had a bond that couldn’t be broken and you wanted to spend every second you could together. As basketball season would be back soon and your academics would be keeping you away. So you’d declare the call over, hanging up and heading to get ready. You’d stack the receipts neatly into a pile before getting up and going to go shower. As well as get yourself ready for the day. And something told you..it was going to be one you’d never forget!

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an hour or so passed and as promised, Eren was at the front entrance of your off campus apartment. Only a mere mile away from the school itself. Pulling up in his red and black Camaro that he had so appropriately nicknamed Venom. You could hear him arriving well before you even spotted him because the pipes were so loud, in addition to the speakers thudding from the trunk. He was a show off in every aspect of the word. Whether on or off the court. But alas, you were so happy to see him and when you came out, dressed in that white biker shorts and tube top set that hugged all your curves just right; including the tummy, hips and ass. The titties were sitting just right too. Along with a crossbody bag and Nikes; hair and nails laced as always; your thick, natural curls bouncing around ..and makeup done, he was smitten. Smiling from ear to ear at the sight. “My best friend so damn fine..look at you.” And you’d mirror his sentiment. The six foot three, tanned ball player in shorts, a baseball jersey with a wife beater underneath, bucket hat and Dunks with a gold wristwatch. Looking good as fuck but that was always. It was no wonder half the campus was after him. Greeting you with open arms and your signature handshake, before pulling you back into a hug. One where he gripped the fat of your ass in the process..something that you didn’t mind one bit! It was then that you’d catch a whiff of his Dior cologne. Making you nearly fall to your knees right there in the parking lot. And truthfully, he didn’t even want to stop touching you. Hands resting on your back until you spoke.

“That’s all you, babyboy. Ready to go?”

“Of course..let’s get up outta here.”

but not before he shuffled around to the passenger’s side to open the door for you. To which you’d repay him with a soft peck to the cheek. He was so sweet and chivalrous, it was adorable. Once he made sure you were secure, he’d sprint to his respective side and the two of you were set for take off. Peeling from the parking lot, you guys were ready for the day ahead. Whilst you were sitting pretty in his passenger seat, Eren began to ask you some questions about what all you needed to do and where to go. “That’s all?! You should’ve called me sooner. We could’ve been left.” “And have Coach Ackerman mad at me for interrupting your conditioning? Hell nah. Besides, we have plenty of time. I just finished the last batch so they’ll be fine. Also, now that you’re done, we have more time to hang out.” Which seemed to be the only thing he wanted to hear. Perking up along with forming a grin across his face, Eren continued driving along..content and satisfied as long as you were by his side. “So you were waiting for me? That’s so sweet.” Because whether it was a party or the pastry section of the store, you guys would always find a way to make it fun and interesting. With no telling what type of adventures you’d get into it. “Duh. Who else is gonna keep me entertained?” “You mean get you in trouble?” “That too, shit..” Ready for whatever the day may bring..the whole time though, you couldn’t help but notice that Eren kept stealing glances of you, more so than usual. Looking over as you sang along to whatever was on his playlist. “Mmm, I don’t mind though. You know I love trouble.” Applying your lip gloss and adjusting your outfit with that sexy smirk on your face. And thus, the flirting commenced. He couldn’t help but stare when you were so gorgeous. That body was something serious and he knew it wasn’t right because you were his best friend, but damn, he was having some thoughts he shouldn’t have after that last remark. Even spacing out as you were talking; letting his mind wander to farther..more inappropriate places. That was until you broke his trance!

“ ‘Rennn, are you even listening to me?”

“Yeah. So where are we going first?”

to which you’d respond with Michael’s and he’d do exactly that. Maneuvering out in and out traffic, switching lanes with one hand on the wheel. It was something so attractive about him doing the most simple of things. So much so, it had you chewing at your lip. You wanted to mess with him, especially seeing his cheeks burning red. “You alright, babyboy? Are you good?” Nodding gently in response. And it wasn’t for a lack of confidence to say these things. You were closer than anyone so a filter didn’t exist and you’d gladly reveal your thoughts. The two of you constantly made jokes about what you'd do to the other. Even if it never led to anything. ‘You know I’ll fold your pretty ass up, right? Stop playing with me, (y/n).’ Saying it constantly after you teased him far too long. More often than not because you’d make a comment or brush up on his thighs. ‘Then quit talking and do it. I’m trying to see what you got.’ You even recalled one time where he FaceTimed you after practice and he had just gotten out of the shower. Leading you to tell him to drop his towel so you could get a peak and he nearly did it; rubbing up on his tattooed chest and raking his fingers through his wet hair. That’s just the type of bond you had! However, any more inappropriate ideas or behavior would have to wait as after a few turns and a red light, you guys arrived at your destination. Unbuckling the seatbelts and grabbing your phones, as well as your purse, the two of you began your journey inside of the infamous craft store. Walking extremely close and even trying to tickle you playfully as you walked up towards the entrance. Which he held the door open for you to. Once inside, he took in the sights and crisp air. This most certainly wasn’t his speed by a long shot. His mom would often tell him during their daily phone calls about her trips to the place back home because she was doing some extreme couponing and decided to stock up on Halloween and Christmas decorations during the summer. He had not the first clue what this place sold or entailed but seeing the sheer happiness on your face was all he needed!

“Look! These cupcake boxes are so pretty! And this ribbon, ugh! I love it.” Your enthusiasm drew a laugh from Eren as he watched from the side. “Look at you, getting all excited..so cute.” Truthfully, it had his heart fluttering. Seeing you in a good mood made him feel better. And gave him an excuse to pick on you. “Like an old ass lady.” Prompting you to smack your lips at him. “You’re just being a hater.” Which he’d deny, playfully pouting his lips and shaking his head. “Not true. I’m just making an observation..” also taking the opportunity to steal a glance at your ass you bent over to retrieve some wrapping paper. Being your best friend was one thing but he was a man before anything. Even the smallest and most minor actions from you made him nervous sometimes. He didn’t know how to deal with his obvious emotions for you. Nonetheless, he’d aimlessly and happily follow you around the store..letting you pick up whatever and place it into your basket. By the time you finished, you had a cart full and he had to carry it for you. Or rather, he wanted to. Once you reached the counter, he’d surprise you again by paying for the items, which came to a nearly one hundred total. A drop in the bucket to the son of a doctor but still, he didn’t have to. You were perfectly fine with taking care of it. That’s just how he was when it came to you though. He’d do anything for his best friend and to see that beautiful smile.. “..thank you, ‘Ren. You didn’t have to do that though. I’m good.” As per usual though, he’d dismiss you by sucking his teeth and paying you no mind. He was always taught to never let a woman pay for her things in the presence of a man. That’s just how he operated. Which was a far cry from the losers you had been on dates with that tried to ditch out at the last minute. Sometimes, he really was the only guy you could tolerate and enjoy. With your bags in tow, Eren carried them to the car, placing them in the backseat before sliding around to open your door for you. Another subconscious habit of his that really made your heart flutter and your feelings for him increase exponentially. “Anyways, where are we heading next? Just say the word.” more than willing to do whatever it took to keep a smile on your face. Little did you know just how far he would go to fulfill that promise..

* . °•★|•°∵ ∵°•|☆•° .** . °•★|•°∵ ∵°•|☆•° .** . °•★|•°∵

The day would ensue as normal; the two of you picking up all of the necessary items you needed..taking a trip to Walmart that was nothing short of adventurous. Pushing him around in the cart, taking silly Snapchat and TikTok videos together. You guys were having a hell of a time. During the day, you couldn’t help but to notice how clingy he had been..constantly feeling you up and even coiling his hand around your waist while standing in line. “Get off of me, you’ gone have people thinking you're my man.” Jokingly brushing him off of you but he was very serious. “Fuck you mean? I am your man. We’re married.” Not long after that, you circled back around campus to make all of your deliveries and of course, your lovely assistant was more than happy to help you ensure that each order was filled and the customers were satisfied. It was the most fun you had ever had since opening up shop. Needless to say, the day was a success and now, the two of you were closing it out with a much needed celebratory dinner at one of your favorite spots in town..

“Ren, my love. I don’t know how I could ever thank you for helping me today. You really came through for me..I don’t know if I would’ve been able to make all of those deliveries by myself. You’re a lifesaver.”

(Y/N) was currently sitting directly across from Eren in a booth tucked off in the back of the place. You were nursing a margarita as you guys awaited your orders. It had been quite a long and eventful day so it felt good to wind down, especially with your favorite person. But it did no good to thank him because he was not trying to hear any talks of repayment or reciprocation when it was all but second nature to him. You honestly didn’t owe him a thing. Especially considering the fact that he was the one wanting to hang out with you. Taking another sip of his Coke, he’d do as per usual and dismiss you with a wave. Refraining from any alcoholic drinks as he was the driver. “You ain’t gotta thank me at all. I already told you, gorgeous..for you? I’ll do whatever.” Causing a barrage of butterflies to swarm in your stomach. If it were even remotely possible, your face would be beet red right now! But alas, he had just covered for you when you’d flash him a smile and reach out for his hand. “I’m a lucky girl. I don’t think too many people can say that they have a best friend as amazing as mine.” “Or as handsome, don’t forget that.” He’d utter playfully; rubbing on his imaginary beard and winking. He truly was a character! Suddenly, the waitress would return with two small bowls holding ice cream sundaes, which was what you had been waiting on. Of course, the girl couldn’t stop staring at Eren, nervously trying to maneuver around…the two of you dove spoon first into the sweet treat, you’d continue your conversation and toying with him.

“You know, one of these days..I think one of these girls is gon’ snatch you up from me. You’ve been getting looks all day.” Which he dismissed as always..for someone so good looking, he was incredibly humble and bashful. You’d think that he was just downplaying his attractiveness but sometimes, he really didn’t see what everyone else did. Especially what you saw. Outstretching a tattooed arm with his gold watch brushing the table, he’d simply continue eating; only smirking a bit without making eye contact with you. “Well I’m not worried about ‘em. I ain’t even interested, honestly. Besides, they can’t do shit for me.” Which was crazy because some of them were insanely beautiful; thick and curvy with a lot of ass, some with slender model bodies that looked like they resided in the gym and others, who were probably cheerleaders or dancers. More so suited to be his type. But it was just one thing they were all missing:

“They’re not you so what the hell do I want with them?” Meaning every single word of what he said. Perhaps you guys weren’t dating or even thinking of a relationship but he constantly made it clear that you were the only woman he wanted in his presence. However, you were afraid if you kept lingering around, he’d never get a girlfriend because everyone would assume that you were his lady. Which wasn’t fair. “Eren. Now some of them were probably really nice and you won’t even give them a chance.” “Sure won’t. The last girl I ‘dated’, tried to steal from me and then cried to get out of it. The other one? Fucked my teammate two days after we had sex. I’m good, trust me. No offense but these bitches can’t even get a handshake out of me at this point. Leave me alone.” Prompting you to laugh, which you felt awful about but his expression was so funny. He wasn’t the type to make a huge fuss out of things but he didn’t tolerate bullshit well either. It took twice for him to get burned to never play near the fire again. Truth be told, he didn’t need those types of problems in his life. Basketball was important and he wasn’t about to let some sleazy homie hopper jeopardize it. Not only that, it did him no good to have a woman in his bed when all he could think about was you being there. Even so, he’d only cross that line if you wanted to. Especially considering that if he voiced all of the perverse thoughts that ran through his head on a daily, he didn’t know if you’d be able to handle it. Besides, you guys were extremely comfortable with one another.

“Enough about me though. Since we’re all in people’s business..what happened between you and dude from the football team? You never talked about him.” Something about the mention made you tense up and want to punch the wall. The defensive lineman you went on a date with a few weeks back was strange to say the least. “Because there ain’t shit to talk about. He pissed me off.” But for all of your grilling and interrogation, he wanted to do the same and hear this story. Even being the petty little brat he was and moving over to your side of the booth to listen. Sometimes, he truly was aggravating! “No no, (y/n). Please share with the class. I gotta hear this.” And since it was obvious he wasn’t moving, you’d sigh and tell him how the guy took you out to go see a movie, to dinner at some really cool restaurant and the evening was going well enough until it wasn’t. And with the more that margarita began to infiltrate your system, the less of a filter you had.. “..I knew he wanted to fuck the whole night, it was the only reason he was pressing me so hard anyways and honestly, he was pretty cute so I didn’t mind. He had been bragging about how he was going to do this and that to it so I decided to test him. We ended up at his place and let me tell you..worst five minutes of my life. Didn’t last one round, couldn’t find the clit..started shaking when I tried to give him..you get the picture. I got my shit, left and blocked his number. I was so mad.” But your best friend was intrigued to say the least. Smirking and laughing because he just always knew you were a problem that many dudes couldn’t handle. Hence why he’d always find it when they’d approach him, asking for your number or to hook them up. You were even more selective than he was! “Ooh (y/n)…you a lil freak, huh? I’m scared of you.” Making you gently push him away in the process. That truly wasn’t even your style to do a ton of hookups or even date often but you figured you’d give that loser a chance, only for him to blow it. Thus proving your point..

“Oh hush. You know I’m not like that. But I don’t think I’ll be wasting my time again. I think I’m cool off of men for good.” But it seemed that Eren had the perfect solution to solve both of your problems. “Damn shame, honestly. You deserve better than that..I mean, I could do a better job.” It was painfully obvious to him that neither of you had the slightest interest in any other person, whether for dating or hookups. You spent the majority of your time together anyways. So why not have a little fun..together? “..oh? Is that right?” “You’ll see..” At least you could try and experiment with a person you trusted. The opportune moment would present itself when you took another spoonful of your ice cream and a single droplet just so happened to trickle down onto your chest! Almost as if it were too perfect! “Oh, damnit.” Trying to catch it before it stained your white top. But there was no napkin required when suddenly, you’d find Eren’s face smashed between your breasts, slurping up the trail of liquid and flicking his tongue between them. Completely catching you off guard! Not because you didn’t enjoy the feeling or that it was so uncommon for the two of you to touch like this..but because he had done it around all of these people!

“Eren, what the hell are you doing?!” Your voice shrieking into a high pitched whisper. Although you were trying not to laugh mostly; feeling slightly ticklish at the sensation. Not to mention a bit turned on…

“What? I was just helping..that’s all.” Stating so long after any remnants of the confectionery was cleaned up. His lips tracing against your skin and eventually, his hands joined them. You couldn’t believe that this was happening and right here in a restaurant nonetheless. Luckily, you were in a booth tucked towards the back of the establishment..away from potentially prying eyes and muddled in the background of the dozens of other patrons..lost in menial conversation and laughter. Too busy to pay attention to anyone other than themselves..which was perfect for Eren! Who was currently groping on your breasts, seemingly unable to pull away. Chewing at your bottom lip, you’d smirk; keeping an eye out for anyone that may be nearing your table. For now, the coast was clear and you two were free to continue your deviance. “I mean..that is what friends are for, right? Helping each other out?” Taunting and teasing you whilst gently massaging your plump tits..slowly pulling your top down and exposing your nipples to the cool air. All the while, you couldn’t help but to stare down at him..letting out soft huffs along with fluttering eyes. He would’ve never done something so lecherous and naughty with another girl. He barely even felt compelled to give them a kiss after the date but with the desire for you growing by the second and the constant talks of seducing one another, he figured there was no time like the present to put such a statement to the test. “Any of your little boyfriends ever done something like this?” Shaking your head, you’d let out a gentle whimper as Eren’s tongue delicately flicked around your swollen brown buds; nimble, perfectly manicured fingers cupping underneath those beautiful mounds. “Mmhmm no.” Shooting you a wink before taking each nipple between his fingertips and squeezing. “Then there’s a first time for everything, huh?” He knew that you were the type of woman that adored spontaneity; oftentimes confiding in him the things that you craved for your next relationship and what you’d do once you got your person..more so specifically, how nasty you’d get for them. You loved when a man took initiative to surprise and sweep you off of your feet. To do something fun and exciting..the type that would undoubtedly on a whim, take you on a day trip out of town and do something fun. Or the type to suck your titties and finger you in the middle of a restaurant! Anything to keep the thrill going..

“ ‘Ren…we’re gonna get caught. Oh my gosh—“ “that’s half the fun, isn’t it? Besides, it’s what you wanted..” all bets and consequences with you around. Suddenly, you’d find yourself caught off guard yet again when he slipped a set of digits into your shorts, and began to massage those obviously soaked folds. Even managing to push one inside of you and pump; making you throw a hand over your mouth in an attempt to pacify your moans. The sounds of sloppy, wet kisses, your sloshing juices and his breath could be heard only faintly through the thumping, upbeat music and various voices. You two were lost in your own world as well..actually doing what you had so long sought after and that was claiming one another’s bodies. But you couldn’t let loose the way you desperately desired. Just then, you’d notice the waitress making her way back over to your area and you’d quickly pat Eren’s shoulder to stop him. To which he’d withdraw; rising back upright and helping you adjust your shirt but not before allowing you to lick your own flavor from his fingers. All with the promise of letting him do whatever once you guys got out of here. And he planned to do exactly that….and give you a night you’d soon never forget!

page break (and partial time skip)

“I can’t believe we’re actually doing this—oh fuck..”

“Shit, can’t believe we’ve waited this long…”

having made it out of the public eye and nighttime skies, back in the comfort of his apartment, where you were free to do as you pleased. Starting with a brief makeout session in the car..kissing up on his neck and fondling his clothes crotch as he drove through the city. Maneuvering throughout the traffic as he tried to contain his hard on, that was growing far more erect with each passing moment. Even jerking him off from the passenger seat when it came to a standstill downtown. Finally, you’d find yourself on his bed..legs parted and partially nude because he couldn’t wait to get his hands on you. Still exchanging slow tongue kisses to the sound of music faintly thumping from his mounted TV. He was still fixated on those big titties as he circulated his thumbs over them. Meanwhile, your palm was still clutching his exposed cock; working his shaft between it as he hovered over you. The realization of what was taking place had set in for both (y/n) and Eren. Honestly, neither of you held a single regret. Whatever happened behind these four walls tonight was you guys’ business and yours alone.

“Lay back f’r me, pretty girl. I wanna see you play with yourself.”

words you never thought to hear coming from your best friend of eight years’ mouth. But truthfully, it wasn’t the first time you had done so. Lying in bed at night, touching yourself to the thought of him inside of you. Pinning your legs back and fucking you all types of crazy. Something you’d never admit out loud but now, nothing was off limits. But alas, you’d do as he asked..bending those thick legs and placing them onto the bed before spreading them as far as they could go. You’d run a hand down your torso and tummy until you reached that plump little pussy, which you parted with two fingers that you had soaked with your own spit. You were so damn sexy to him and it was like a dream turned reality that he had you all to himself. However, there was a reason for his little set of instructions, as he plans to utilize it later on. Before he touched you any further, he needed to know what made you tick, what turned you on and of course, everything he needed to please you. He wanted this first time between you guys to be semi-special because he wanted there to be a next! To be able to make love to you as many times as he liked, even if no formidable romantic relationship came out of it and you guys remained nothing more than friends . He just wanted you to be satisfied…

“..tell me all that you said in the car. All that nasty shit you wanted me to do..” from your tamest of demands to your filthiest, freakiest desires, he was all ears. Setting his ego aside and letting his partner communicate was important to him. He could do all of these intricate moves; touching you here, licking you there but if it wasn’t what got you going then there was no point in you guys taking this step! It seemed awkward but it was necessary. Instead, he’d join you on the mattress as you rubbed on that swollen clit and edged himself along, listening to your demands. From how you liked things just a little rough; being slapped or choked…how giving head got your pussy wetter than receiving sometimes and that you obviously loved having your nipples sucked on. Most importantly, you liked being on top but absolutely loved, being controlled and dominated a bit. It was something about a man being able to handle you like a weightless rag doll that you got you off! “You think you can handle that?” Jokingly stating but he wasn’t deterred at all. Rather, he was more determined than ever. He had no idea his best friend was so nasty. And with all of that pertinent information, Eren knew exactly what had to be done..

“Yeah..come sit on my fucking face.”

demanding as he lied flat against the mattress with his dick standing perfectly erect. You thought he was crazy at first but he mirrored your sentiment. Because too became more aroused when pleasing his partner. It may have been a bit of an obsession even, but he loved eating pussy…shoving his tongue inside of you, working his fingers around and sucking on that swollen bud. All for the payoff of that sweet cum trickling down the sides of his mouth. He knew you tasted heavenly and he wanted to savor you yet again. However, you were a little apprehensive about doing what he asked; afraid you might suffocate him but he was a true man, not a little boy. He could handle that shit and then some! Giving you an encouraging, heavy handed slap to the ass, he’d usher you to turn around and position yourself on his face whilst yours would be buried between his legs. “Don’t look at me like that. Sit that ass on my face, baby. I can handle it.” Locked in a sixty nine position where you both free to fuck each other’s mouths. Grasping his thighs and calves to keep a firm grip, you’d begin by flicking your tongue across his tip; red, pulsating and seeping with pre cum. Oozing all down the sides as you were quick to lap them up. Eventually, you’d start to gain a rhythm..slowly sliding that tongue up and down his shaft as if it were a delicious lollipop. He was grunting underneath you; a sure sign that you were doing a wonderful job of pleasuring him. Honestly, it was the best head he had ever gotten. Meanwhile, his nose was buried into your mound..inhaling the sweet scent of your cunt as he dove tongue deep into your pussy. You were both working in tandem to bring each other pleasure, no matter what. Faint humming and moaning arising from his lips and loud cries erupted from yours. Finding yourself gagging on a portion of that thick cock, you’d spit up and eventually jerk him off. “Eren…oh my god. Eating this pussy so good..fuck yes.” Cooing to him through desperate moans. But he’d only urge you to keep riding his face with those subtle twerks by spanking you. You’d come any minute now if he didn’t stop.

suddenly, you’d find yourself stuffed to the brim with two fingers, pumping interchangeably as they worked your insides..

“Pussy taste so fucking good..can’t wait to feel this shit.”

and he didn’t have to wait long once you began to wiggle that ass on his face, begging him to fuck you already. You needed to feel that dick stretching you out and see what he could really do with it. Could your best friend truly be the one you had been looking for? You’d find out soon enough when he patted your plump cheeks again and told you to let him up so that he could get behind you. Once you were both in position, he’d grasp the small of your back and guide you towards him, watching those fat lips spread open from behind.

“Arch that fucking back for me, baby. Right there—see, you know what to do.” Chuckling to himself as he grasped his shaft and patted it against those folds, teasing the tip up and down your slit until you trembled underneath him. “Mmphm..I need it so bad. Please..” “..what is it? What do you need? Tell me..” it was so expected of him to tease you like this. But it was all as a means to not only get you even more turned on but to establish control a bit. He wanted to hear you whimper and grovel for what you desired. “Erennn, quit playing. Oh my God.” That sweet little voice moaning his name and everything else was the driving force behind it all. When you didn’t answer to his liking, he’d smack it yet again and proceed to ask once more. “I said tell me..what do you want me to do? Use those words.” growing slightly more impatient and anxious himself, as his tip was practically glowing red and throbbing, still sensitive from being sucked and edged on. He was ready to put it to good use. But you were a little hesitant that you could take it! You figured he was packing, that was never a doubt in your mind. But that he was this big? Veiny, thick and eight and half inches. Oh, you could see why half the campus was after him. However, his sights were locked and set on you solely.

“Fuck me…give me all that dick.” Flicking your tongue across your lips to entice him further.

to which he was happy to oblige! Placing his thumb slightly above your asshole, Eren began to ease himself in, releasing a deep, shuddered breath when that warmth began to make contact with his length. He was overwhelmed by how tight and sticky you were but he held his own and was willing to do whatever to satisfy you sexually. Even if it meant getting slightly rough as you requested. You’d grasp at the sheets, face down already because that cock was making home between your walls and stretching you out in the process. The insane part was that he only got halfway before you began to shake, as well as coat him with wetness.

“..damn, and you’re creaming? Shit, (y/n).” But he was merely getting a taste of what was in store. If he wasn’t careful, you’d have him taking up permanent residence at your place and ready to fight any dude you fucked with. But you were certain there’d be no need in spinning the block after getting a taste of him. The guttural groans leaving his throat, the subtle yet deep thrusts causing the collision of your flesh; the thick of your ass against his pelvis..all underneath the dim, fluorescent lighting of the tv. The vibe was right for all that was transpiring and you honestly didn’t want it to end. Fortunately, he had no plans for that..he wanted to take his time and make this moment all the more memorable. After all, he had been waiting a while for this opportunity. To have you throwing it back on him, meeting his strokes, even through rough pounding and hard smacks to your backside. With his palm resting idly between the cusp of your love handles and hip, Eren tugged you towards him, gradually increasing his speed. The thunderous sounds of clapping flesh meshing well with your collective set of moans. Plump lips swallowing him with each one and inside, being met with a pulsating feeling.

“Ahhh..fuck, mama. This pussy’s so good. The best I’ve ever had..”

sounding ever so vulnerable with his head rolled back on his shoulders, fearing that if he caught a glimpse of those bouncing cheeks or that pretty face, he might bust prematurely. Still, he paced himself..wanting to enjoy the experience and let this euphoric feeling take over each of you..and when you began to talk back, praising him for how well he was doing, he nearly lost all sense of composure! Clawing the satin sheets, (y/n) chewed into your lip in a half assed attempt to stifle moans but there was no helping it. You were way too stimulated right now. “Right there, ‘Ren…you’re hitting my spot, baby. Oh my God, I ain’t never been fucked like this.” Crying out with semi-rolled eyes and a quivering jaw..only worsened when he sped up, burrowing himself over your frame with harder thrusts and that thumb pad sinking further into your tight hole.

“Right here? That’s the spot, baby?”

“Yeah, daddy. You fucking me so good right now!”

getting an answer that would only further awaken his inner beast. A smirk suddenly curled across his lips as he became excited at the mention of the name; most certainly strengthening his ego. In and out at interchangeable speeds, you had begun to glaze him in a mixture of cream and silky warmth.

“Then nut all over this dick, baby. There you go..” guiding you by the cusp of your hip; pounding you relentlessly from that point because both ego and cock were inflated by your praise. And he could tell that when he cooed to you, massaging the curvature of your spine, calling you things like baby and pretty girl, that pussy clenched even tighter and gushed even more, almost as if on command. It was as if your bodies were perfectly and equally yoked..like two missing puzzle pieces finally being connected. It was a shame that either of you had waited so long, whether from fear of rejection or respect, to make a move. But you were glad that he had done so tonight. And the feeling was mutual.

“Look at how good you’re taking that dick…letting my shit stretch you like that. She’s so wet..and warm. You make me never wanna leave it.” Confessing in his pussy drunken stupor whilst bending over to kiss down the curvature of your spine. Which sent shutters throughout your entire body, especially when he glided his tongue across the same spot. Inadvertently switching you two to a sort of side fucking position in the process where he hoisted your leg up and told you to keep it there. But what truly made you tick was when he reached around to cup your breasts, gently pinching on your nipples and massaging. You were practically drooling, grinning with a fucked out expression on your face. “Can I stay in it, baby? Give you that dick you deserve all the time?…” sweetly questioning with the flick of his tongue dancing around your earlobe and neck. With the way he was making you feel? He was gonna have to move in now! He was the absolute perfect lover, maybe because he already knew you better than anyone else in this world and all that remained to be explored was your body, which he was willing to take all night and do. “…working so hard, handling your business and shit..and looking so fucking sexy when you do. That’s the type of shit to get you fucked on and spoiled with a real man..what you really need. You want better for yourself, don’t you, baby?” Sliding a thumb between your lips as he cooed softly. It was something about that balance between gentle and rough, that had you melting like putty between his fingertips. And when you begged him to take you; admitting that you were submitting yourself wholly to him, he didn’t disappoint. Knowing you were mere seconds from exploding in his grasp.

“Hnghh! Yes…this your pussy now, daddy. Keep fucking me just like that.”

admitting through trembling breaths as your climax was growing nearer. Feeling how close you were and becoming rather sensitive himself, Eren decided to turn your head to face him, pulling you both into a searing kiss as he reached down to lightly rub your clit. Balls smacking against your entrance and a puddle of frothy white bliss billowing down his shaft and from your tightness. Yet again, without missing a beat, he’d flip you over and fold those legs up, putting them behind your head. This time, with a little more aggression. Almost as if your submissiveness was causing him to become far more erratic. He’d start to huff, grunting as he grew closer to his peak. He’d pull out for only a split second, splattering you with a tiny trail of precum and your pretty liquids. You were trembling but he’d instruct you to hold them in place. “Don’t move, baby. Just stay there..you’re doing so good.”

and just like before, he’d resume drilling your shit and dicking you down.

“Gonna make you come f’r me, baby. Gonna make this pretty pussy come all over my dick. You better do it..wanna nut in it too. Fill you up and watch it drip out. Shit turns me on so much.” nearly desperate in his pleas but that’s what made them all the more attractive. Admittedly, he’d never came inside of a girl because half of them couldn’t be trusted but he loved the idea of his girl being bred by him and when you agreed, he was excited.. His thin gold necklace swaying against your face as it had done your back prior..his lips pressed to yours in a haze of slow, nasty kisses. The type that only could be shared between two people with intense passion… “look at me, pretty girl..” but the second he reached that core, pressing into the pit of your stomach and grazing your cervix, you’d fade out on him and Eren had to all but coax you back. Your nails clawing at his shoulder blades and eyes trailed back with nothing more than incoherent babble coming from your mouth..almost as if you were having an out of body experience. Doing so with some light slaps to your cheek!

“I said look at me. We’re coming together, okay? Same time, baby. Here, take my hands.” Ushering you to rest those legs atop his shoulders and clutch fingers so that he could guide you through that nut..talking you through it as a real man would.

“Good girl…just keep squeezing me. You’re right there, I can feel it.” Meanwhile, you were on the brink of tears from the immense pressure swelling inside of you. Tits bouncing, legs trembling and body a complete wreck of orgasmic bliss. “So count with me. On three, I want you to let go.” Nodding your head in response and he’d place a kiss to your forehead, brushing your thumb pad across his cheek. “Don’t hold back..” and with that, he’d start his countdown. Starting at one, it’d seem like an eternity but alas, you both hit that fateful number and it was as if fireworks exploded, your hearts thudded from your chest and the two of you saw heaven simultaneously. It was hands down the best orgasm either of you had ever felt!..made apparent by the loud, pathetic cries that escaped both of you along with your cum. You squirting all over his abs and him filling you with a long stream of nut. The warmth of being stuffed made it even better.

he was an absolute mess, tears coming down his face to match your own and the two of you just held one another close as you rode out those orgasms; immersed in an ecstasy filled haze. One that could only be found after true love making.

“Thank you, baby. Thank you so much for letting me fuck you like this. I needed that..” sticking his fingers into your mouth to suckle on as you grinned at one another as you basked in the afterglow. It was safe to say that neither you had plans to spin the block on any past partners nor leave this bed anytime soon.

“You know you’re stuck with me, right? Like I’m not letting you go..” admitting as you caressed the side of his cheek. You had nothing to worry about because it’d take something major to pry him away from the girl that he always knew he loved.

“I’ve been here all this time..nothing can separate us now.”

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dr-duckie · 20 days

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soooo has anyone thought of a mdzs x svsss transmigration au with shen jiu and meng yao?

i’m not going into detail over their similarities but most people get the idea— brothels, yqy/lxc, spite, villainous antagonists that didn’t deserve what they were put through as a child, late start in cultivation, cunning personality, etc etc

yea.

let me start: shen jiu, one day, is gifted a high quality book set from one of his brothel jiejies when visiting them. at first, shen jiu had no plans to legitimately read them (mostly due to a lack of leisure time), but he eventually got to reading it when he was on a qian cao-mandated break after a qi deviation.

he gets hooked. when SJ is nearing the end of the novel, his thoughts are as followed: JGS deserved to get castrated and his limbs thrown to the endless abyss— WWX, although he was absolutely shameless, he was at least competent— LWJ was a fool for being so in love, but he was moral and loyal— and lan xichen…

an ache forms in shen jiu’s heart whenever he thinks about him. lxc, a man with a gentle, pacifistic, amiable personality who believed in what was right all the way until the end. he wholeheartedly supported and trusted his sworn brother, jin guangyao, until he couldn’t anymore.

shen jiu was touched. lan xichen, that man, had wasted all his efforts on an irredeemable monster. in a similar fashion, yue qingyuan was doing the same.

as for meng yao… shen jiu resented him. he had a loving mother, one who worked so hard for his happiness, only to squander all her efforts. meng yao… had what shen jiu envied the most in the newest disciple he just brought in. luo binghe. imo, it would be a clear sign of shen jiu’s self hatred projected onto meng yao. he sees the two of them as the hopeless scum of society, too broken to be loved. they were “charity cases” that couldn’t be fixed, no matter what.

soon after shen jiu finishes the novel, he falls into a qi deviation (the very same one that shen yuan transmigrated into) and dies. through some time space dimension jumping, shen jiu lands into the body of one 14 yo meng yao. and that’s just the beginning of his story.

shen jiu starts out by practicing cultivation in secret. meng yao’s body, although he is no prodigy, would definitely benefit from practicing from a younger age. then he gets to planning. with how shen jiu is, he would not step a foot in the karp tower, with a system or not. like, just no. i believe he’d set JGS on fire if he ever had to see the guy. the only plot point shen jiu intends on fulfilling is saving lan xichen, and then living a comfortable life away from the jianghu.

but within a year of living with meng shi in the brothel, shen jiu grows attached to her. he *wants* to make her proud, even if he wasn’t her real son. he was a total impostor. but even so, he didn’t want her legacy to be tainted by the actions of jin guangyao— who was now still meng yao, who is now shen jiu. but he doesn’t want to go to the jin sect. after an arduous process of actual communication with someone for a long time, meng shi realizes that the jin sect wouldn’t be good for her son, and jin guangshan wouldn’t help her *or* meng yao. the night before meng shi dies, she tells shen jiu that she loves him, regardless of whether he may fulfill her dreams.

aaaand, after that, shen jiu buries meng shi. he makes enough money as an artist (in secret, with his skillset from qing jing) to give her the proper burial rites. after that, he runs away. shen jiu finds a job as an assistant to an artist who sold fans and paintings in caiyi town. through his job, he meets NHS first, when he’s on his first year of being st the cloud recesses. surprisingly, shen jiu and nie huaisang have a friendship that… isn’t too bad. shen jiu is amiable, shows off the different fans he’s painted, and nie huaisang eagerly buys all of them. nie huaisang also buys out shen jiu’s other works, like his poetry and short stories. that day, with shen jiu’s qiankun pouch full, he treats himself to tanghulu.

the second encounter with nie huaisang brought along jiang cheng and wei wuxian. at that point in time, they were investigating the waterborne abyss problem. shen jiu, a year older now, shows nie huaisang his “new” invention: the war fan. wei wuxian is absolutely delighted at the new invention, and jiang cheng, although less excited that WWX, is considerably impressed as well. as for NHS, well, words can’t describe his happiness. shen jiu, on a whim, gifts it to him for free— mockingly thanking NHS for being such a generous patron. nie huaisang, unable to contain his excitement anymore, jumps on shen jiu and embraces him dramatically. this causes such a commotion, lan wangji comes over. with his brother.

(okay, i’m done writing for today.)

#mdzs #svsss #shen jiu #meng yao #shen qingqiu #jin guangyao #qijiu #xiyao #what if

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madhatterbri · 25 days

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New Deal | HOOK

Summary: Y/N's friend betrays her to the Senerchia family.

Author's Note: @99hook Thanks for everything, boo. When we finally meet, I won't throw your ass into the ocean. ❤️😂 When is that next part coming out?

Tag List: @plentyoffandoms @theworldofotps @multi-fandom-things730

Pure fiction ❤️

"They won't give us an extension, you know. The Senerchias. They said they've been too lenient with us and don't want people to think they are getting soft," your friend whispered from behind the counter that was once her family's restaurant. Almost everything was sold to try and pay off their debts, but they couldn't come up with the money.

"Why are you whispering?" You asked with the same soft tone. With no customers around, it wasn't like anyone could hear. She nodded towards a corner of the room. A camera was pointed at them. The look of fear in her eyes made you realize one thing. The Senerchias had the place bugged.

The Senerchias were known all throughout New York. They helped the community by giving out money to those who needed it. They expected to be paid back by the agreed upon deadline. What many didn't know was the extremes they would go to get paid back.

"I hear the boss is an ass, but maybe you could talk to his son. You went to school with him. Maybe things will be different," you spoke hopefully. You knew the answer the moment she frowned at you.

"Tyler was the one that told us they were coming sometime this week. He didn't seem too thrilled to see me, either. I guess he won't be coming to the high school reunion. I'm wondering if I'll even make it," she gulped.

A car's headlights shined through the windows. The lights turned off as soon as the car shut off. Your friend gulped yet smiled at you. She took out her phone from her pocket. Her mouth dropped open when an idea popped in her head.

"Do you mind letting them in? I just have to go out back and make a quick phone call to my uncle to let him know they are here," she spoke. "It'll take like a few seconds,"

You nodded, and your friend hugged you tightly. She told you thank you and slipped out the back door. Two men appeared at the front door. One was bald with a snake tattooed over his right ear. He was bigger than the other one and appeared to be the muscles of the group. The second man was balding. He seemed more like the talker of the two. Both men wore suits with gold chains. The man with the snake tattoo was shaking the handle impatiently to be let in.

"Coming!" You called out, trying to sound confident. Your legs felt like jello as you made your way towards the door. Nothing could be heard except for the loud pounding in your heart. You opened the door wide enough to let them in.

"Look at this, Enzo. This dude let his niece take the hit. That's some punk shit," the man with the snake tattoo scowled.

"No one wants to mess with the boss. Man probably hiding somewhere shaking like a leaf," Enzo chuckled and rolled his eyes.

"I'm not the niece. She stepped out back to call her uncle to let him know you were here," you informed them and pointed to the back door.

"Just go check it out, Cobra. Ty gave them clear instructions yesterday," Enzo shooed the other away. Cobra grumbled about how this better not be a trick as he walked towards the back.

He opened the wooden back door and stepped out. A blast of the cold night air filled the restaurant. Seconds ticked away. It felt like an eternity of waiting for the man to come back. When he did, your friend was nowhere to be found.

"Either you are making up the story or your friend crossed ya, which is it?" Cobra asked roughly and slammed the door behind him.

"I'm not lying. She said she was going to step out to call her uncle. I've been friends with her since middle school. I believed her," you whispered the last part. A sudden realization hit on how stupid that must sound to them. They probably didn't trust many people.

Cobra nodded towards Enzo at the front door. In one quick movement, the man grabbed your wrist tightly. The force made your teeth clench and hiss. You were sure he was going to leave a bruise.

"You are coming with us," Enzo instructed and led you towards the waiting car. A man sat in the driver seat, tapping his fingers against the steering wheel.

"I'm not the niece," you begged and tried to remove his grasp from your wrist.

"And my misses made roast tonight, and I ain't letting it get cold," Cobra announced and opened the back door while running to the other side. The man sat in the back seat. Your captor shoved you in the car before sitting next to you. You now sat between the two men involved in your kidnapping.

"We will make it easy for you," Cobra smiled and pulled out a gun. You gasped and looked at him with fear in your eyes. He placed the barrel to your head. "Play a stupid game, and you'll win a stupid prize, capiche?"

"And please don't do anything stupid," Enzo sighed and looked down at his suit. "These are quite expensive, and I'm banned in all of the dry cleaning shops in New York and New Jersey,"

Your mouth opened to speak, yet nothing came out. Tears quickly pooled in your eyes. You closed your eyes and nodded quickly.

"They get softer every year," Cobra grumbled and rolled his eyes.

The car ride was not as expected. The driver hummed a lively tune, much to the annoyance of the two men sitting with you. You tried to keep quiet. Mentally remembering anything and everything just in case you were able to escape.

The car ride ended by some old abandoned buildings. Broken glass littered the floor, and graffiti riddled the buildings. A limousine, clearly out of place given the area, was parked. The driver stopped the car and stepped out. He leaned against the car and started to smoke. Enzo was the next to vacate the vehicle. Cobra followed and dragged you out.

A tall man with brown hair stepped out of the waiting limousine. He wore a suit similar to the ones that the other men wore. A gold chain with a cross hung from his neck. He took a few steps towards them and crossed his arms. Something was clearly wrong.

"Here she is, Ty," Enzo announced. "Where do you want us to put her for that ransom video to uncle?"

Tyler moved as if looking around you to see someone else. He had a scowl on his face. A vein popped out to show his annoyance at his men. He wanted to send Anthony, Dante, and Darius for the job, but his dear old dad insisted these fools.

"This isn't the right girl," he spoke calmly, yet his words were drenched in anger. His nostrils flared. "I gave you a picture of the girl. Get rid of this one somewhere and get me the right one,"

Tyler started walking back to the limousine. He muttered under his breath about the incompetence of others.

"Done," Cobra shrugged and pulled out his gun. The barrel was once again pressed to your body. You felt the cold ring of the metal against your temple.

"Wait, wait, wait!" You begged and threw your hands up. "I'll help you get her,"

Tyler stopped and turned to look at you. He mulled your words over before entertaining your idea. Hell, you were even shocked that you would help them. Then again your friend deserved it.

"Pretty dangerous proposition you are making today. Making a deal with the mafia. Are you sure you are up for it?"

"She betrayed me. She and I hang out all the time. I can just come up with a lie," you assured him.

"Forget the girl. Give me the uncle, and I will let you live, deal?" He asked and reached out his hand to you. You stared at his hand briefly. You wondered how many lives it had taken before.

"Deal," you answered and shook his hand. For someone so rough they were surprisingly soft.

#fanfiction #aew fanfic #aew fanfiction #hook #hook aew #aew hook fanfic #aew hook #hook x y/n #hook x you #hook fanfiction #hook x reader

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rainbow-femme · 6 days

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Of all the companion pairings, I hadn’t expected Wyll/Karlach being my favorite but I just love the dynamic

Because obviously you’ve got the whole thing of him wanting to kill her because he thought she was evil and then realized she was also a victim and was willing to be turned into a demon because he wasn’t willing to sacrifice an innocent person for himself, and her then being willing to stand up to the devils who want her dead on his behalf

But I also feel like as far as a relationship dynamic they would be a Prince Charming/damsel thing except they both think they’re the Prince Charming and the other is the damsel

Wyll lamenting how his endlessly kind wife who only wants to live a simple life where she is treated equally kindly was tricked, sold, had her heart replaced with an infernal engine that keeps her trapped in basically hell, and was forced to be the first line of attack for the devil who did this to her. Meanwhile behind him Karlach is looking at a locked metal gate and just decides to open it by bending the bars with her bare hands, melting the iron as she does because she has flames inside of her body

Karlach talking about her poor husband Wyll who gave up a comfortable life as the son of a duke to be entered into a devil’s pact and made into a homeless hero who would always protect people but never really get to exist as his own person outside of his pact and his folk hero perception. Meanwhile Wyll is eldritch blasting a demon in the face behind her with an entirely casual and unbothered look on his face

They fix Karlach to the point where she can leave Avernus and Wyll goes to his family and friends to prepare them for meeting her, telling them that she can be very sensitive and has gone through some rough times and grew up on the streets so she’s going to be more rough around the edges than they’re used to and it would probably upset her to come back home only to be made fun of, so please be kind. And in walks his 7 foot tall wife who is as wide as the door with her big giant muscles, battle ax strapped to her back, slapping Duke Ravengard on the shoulder and asking “How the hell are ya?”

Karlach goes to her old Baldur’s Gate friends and says she wants them to meet her husband but he’s the son of nobility and spent a long time living in that more polished world so he talks very formal and polite and isn’t really used to how they talk and interact so please don’t make fun of him if you think he speaks funny. And in walks the Blade of the Frontiers with a suspicious amount of not quite dried blood on his pants

They both think they’re the “They said no pickles” part of the relationship but actually if they asked for no pickles and were given pickles they would make eye contact with the person who did it while using their biggest two handed weapon to scrape the pickles off onto the floor

#they are just so #they both deserve gentleness and to be protected while wanting to give that to others #and also are two of the strongest most competent fighters in Faerun #and without the devils and tadpoles and Absolute they are 100% the scariest things in any given vicinity #and no one wants to be the one to bring it up to them #bg3 #karlach #wyll ravengard #karlach x wyll #baldurs gate 3 #wyllach

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rederiswrites · 2 months

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Well, today I had the entertainment of having a dental hygienist schedule me for my next cleaning to make sure that she was the one doing the cleaning, so that she could hear "the end of the story". It was definitely a uniquely entertaining tooth cleaning.

You see, I got a message from Jacob while I was in the waiting room, telling me that... Well, the situation with my mom, who lives in our basement and is causing us problems I don't really need to get into, had deteriorated even further. So when the hygienist went to take my blood pressure, I was like, "oh actually, it might be really bad right now, cuz I just got upsetting news, don't worry about it." And then it was, in fact, fairly terrible. It's always been great before, and was great in their records, so we called that one a scratch.

But naturally she was curious to know what had my blood pressure through the roof. Presumably if I'd brushed it off she'd have respected that, but I was like, hell, why not, it's some pretty wild gossip. So I told her the basic outlines, and actually it was good for me, because at some point I'd really started to give my mom a little too much credit, trying to keep the situation peaceful. The hygienist gave me a fresh perspective of like, "wait so why is that even a problem for her?" And at a couple points there seemed to be surprising parallels with her life. So when I was done, and hopefully less likely to pop a blood vessel, I said, "Well I gave you the goods, I think you'll agree, so fill me in on your story!"

Because after all I was about to have her hands in my mouth for fifteen minutes, so my turn with the talking ball was definitely over.

She's like, "Alright, but fair warning, this might be more uncomfortable for you than me." And naturally I say something to the effect of, "Oh nah I'm cool with most things", and she gets to work.

"So ten years ago," she begins, "my husband died."

Me: *indistinct noises of shock and dismay* What's that one Twitter thread--"I know, classic start to a funny story."

Anyhow, short version, her husband died, she had a two year old to take care of, and she was working as a social worker and feeling like she couldn't take another day of it. So she quit her job, sold her house, moved back in with her parents (she got space in the unfinished basement, the baby got her old bedroom) and trained to become a hygienist. It certainly hadn't been her plan to still be there ten years later, but hey, she had help with the kid, he comes home to his grandparents every day instead of her scrambling to find a situation for him until she gets off work, and she feels spoiled to have her mom cooking for her. It's not perfect, but the way she sees it, it's been much better this way for her son.

So now she's gotta wait six months to find out if we get a mediator and how we settle the situation. Which I guess means I gotta actually settle it. God I hope.

As we were saying goodbye, I said, "Wait, I didn't get the punchline. Are you happier as a hygienist?"

"Oh. Oh yeah. Absolutely."

#this is ridiculous

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gabessquishytum · 4 months

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Happy Holidays!!! 🎄🎄

Dream used to be one of the most sought-after, highly priced, escorts in the city. His "boyfriend" experience was second to none, and he never caught feelings (wellllll, there was.....). In any event, he's out of the business and happy and successful doing his art. He doesn't even keep a hand in, he's done, so he wasn't expecting a call from his old madam on a random Tuesday. It's only because he owes Joanna a favor that he even picks up.

Ever direct, Joanna said that one of his old clients specifically asked for a date with him. Now this wasn't the first time that's happened since Dream got out of the business, but this is the first time the requester was Robert Gadling.

Robert Gadling was a name he hadn't heard in ages. For a time, Hob was a regular. He was a work hard, no time for play, tech guy, building his company one long night after the other, and he didn’t really have time (make time) for dating. Dream thought he was fantastic, and if their relationship wasn't transactional, Dream would have let those feelings he was catching take stronger hold.

At some point Hob met his Eleanor and had one last "date" with Dream and went off to eventually get married and live that life, a life without Dream. Dream didn't even keep tabs, that would have been so bad for his mental health, but last he heard, Hob sold his company for billions and stepped back to be with his family. Dream was (bittersweetly) happy for him.

Dream didn't know if he......, he said yes right away.

When Dream was ushered into the mansion by the sea, he wasn't sure what he was expecting, but it wasn't a giggling, streaking, wet toddler, who proceeded to use his leg to hide from his equally wet father --- the years have been super kind to Hob, "DILF" suited him. Hob still blushed, and tugged on his ear, the same; saying he hoped to have Robin down before Dream arrived. Hob never ceased to charm Dream, so Dream offered to help with bedtime.

Once Robin was down for the night (although, having a whole new,,,pretty,,, person around didn't help calming Robin down), Hob apologized for calling his old work number, but he didn't know how else to not so creepily contact Dream.

Hob was a retired widower now and could use a friend, especially one that might not mind being more,,,,without payment involved.

Oh hell yeah!!! Former lovers reconnecting is such a cute idea. I definitely think that Dream would get to a point where he's craving love, and Hob is out here with so MUCH love to give him! Truth is, Hob is so tired of being on his own (as much as he loves his son, he is clawing at the walls because he needs adult conversation). Hob would take anything that Dream would give him, and Dream is hesitantly hopeful.

As they renew their friendship, Dream sees that Hob is definitely a different man to the cocky, slightly crazy businessman he knew all those years ago. He's devoted to his son, he cooks, he's domestic, he wears jeans and football shirts and his hair is going grey. Dream falls in love at the mere sight of him. And Hob is also shyer than he used to be. He keeps blushing. Fortunately, Robin is happy to hold the conversation. Hob doesn't seem to mind having Dream around his son - he never mentions Dream’s previous career or makes any crude jokes. He just gazes, mildly starstruck, as Dream tells Robin a dozen shark facts and offers to paint one for his bedroom.

Inevitably they fall into each other's arms once Robin is tucked up in bed (Dream read his bedtime story). They snuggle up on the sofa and make out like teens, and go to bed without actually having sex. It's the reassurance Dream didn't know he needed, and when he wakes up to find Hob smiling at him and offering breakfast in bed? This time he's really hoping that he'll be allowed to stay forever.

#the sandman #dreamling #nsft

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upon-a-starry-night · 4 months

Text

Christmas Tree Trouble (Spencer)

Spencer Reid x Gender Neutral Reader

Ficmas Masterlist Spencer Masterlist

Wordcount: 2.7k

Summary: You need a bit of help getting your Christmas tree into your apartment so you ask your neighbor for help

A/n: The beginning is the same but differs per character

~~~

You weren’t expecting much when you knocked on your neighbor's door for help with your 8ft Christmas tree. Honestly, you weren’t even sure if they would help. You knew they were home. You’d heard the door across the hall open and shut enough times throughout the week to know they went on a lot of odd grocery runs at 1 am.

But you’d never really spoken much, a few times at community functions and when you’d see each other in the hall but neither of you made an effort to talk to each other. However, that was mainly because you were intimidated by how attractive they were.

Still, they had seemed more on the reserved side. Never bringing anyone home or throwing parties at their place. They were a perfect neighbor on paper, but their loneliness often made you sad.

Initially, you had wanted to invite them over at some point during the holidays just to make a new friend and help them be less lonely but it became more of a need than a want when you tried to lug your 8ft tree into your apartment by yourself.

So you knocked on their door across the hall and prayed that they would be willing to help you out.

You rocked back and forth on your heels as you waited for a response, just as you were about to give up and turn to ask another neighbor the sound of locks clicking alerted you of their presence.

When the door opened you observed their tired-looking figure, they were dressed in casual gray sweats and a loose T-shirt.

They stared at you curiously as you stood there before their eyes drifted behind you to the large tree lying on the floor in front of your apartment door. They raised their eyebrows in surprise.

“Hi!” you waved awkwardly “Listen I know this is random and you’re probably busy so you can say no but I kind of underestimated how hard it would be to get this tree in my apartment and I already had to carry this from my car to here and I scared a bunch of people out of the elevator because this thing took up the whole elevator and-” You stopped rambling when you saw a hint of a smile on their face, you think this is the first time you’ve ever seen them smile.

It’s cute.

“Sorry, what I’m saying is, can you help me?” You anxiously bit your lip as you waited for a response.

His hair's a little disheveled and you can’t help but watch as he runs a hand through it.

You silently observe as his gaze flickers to your tree and then back towards you a few times

“Did you know there are approximately 25-30 million Real Christmas Trees sold in the U.S. every year?”

The fact throws you off guard and you find yourself blinking owlishly before finally processing his words

“Really?” you genuinely had no idea they sold that many. Guess the Christmas tree farms in Hallmark movies must be making bank every year. “This is my first year ever having a real tree so…”

You underestimated just how tall and heavy this tree was going to be. It was so much easier to order one online and assemble it yourself piece by piece.

But you told yourself you were getting a real one in true Christmas fashion…only now you were starting to regret not taking up the farm owner's offer to send his son with you to help. Y’know stranger danger and all that.

However, asking your neighbor you’ve never really met could also be classified as stranger danger.

Your brain wasn’t currently thinking logically though so here you are in front of his apartment sizing him up as you realize he might not even be able to help you either.

Sure he was tall and handsome and you knew he had some kind of job that had him rushing out of the house at odd hours but looking at him now you wondered if you could carry more weight than him…

He seemed to come to that exact conclusion at the same time as you as he cringed a little bit and seemed to almost droop.

He reminded you of a sad flower or a wounded puppy. It made you want to hug him.

“I don’t know if I’m the best person for that- I have this friend I could probably call him to come and help-”

You would have to look up if you had Alien Hand Syndrome when you got the chance because involuntarily you reach out and grip his arm as he turns to go back into his apartment. The action seems to startle the both of you and you quickly retreat your hand.

“I’m sorry! I just- I don’t need your friend. Between you and me I think we could make this work”

In any other context, that sentence feels like it belongs in a romance movie and you subconsciously check the hallways for a camera crew and boom mic.

Green-ish-brown eyes bore into yours and you get the feeling he’s searching for something. For what you have no idea but he seems to have liked whatever he found because a brief smile slips onto his face as he observes your nervous stature.

“Let me change real quick and then we’ll see if we can ‘make this work’” You want to cringe at his blatant tease over your cheesy choice of words but you don’t get the chance to because he’s already turning and shutting the door behind him.

You swear you saw a little bit of a smirk when he teased you but it could have been a trick of the light.

Your landlord really needed to change that flickering bulb

In the meantime, you manage to stand the tree up all by itself and lean it against the wall and you’re quite proud of yourself until it moves an inch.

Again it could be a trick of the light, at least you hope it is because if this thing fell you were definitely getting crushed like a Christmas movie villain.

Much to your dismay the tree begins to slide again and you shut your eyes and prepare for the worst as the fluffy green mass begins to fall in your direction.

When the feeling of being crushed never comes you open your eyes and watch as the tree hits the floor with a final ‘thump’

Only now do you notice the feeling of something warm against your back. You thought maybe that was just what the hallway carpet felt like.

Looking down you notice two arms wrapped around your middle, and you’re currently standing two feet away from where you were when you closed your eyes.

You hadn’t even felt yourself move?

Looking up you’re met again with those enchanting eyes as they meet yours with concern.

“You changed your hair” You can’t help but frown at his hairs now-styled state. You kinda liked the disheveled sleepy look he was sporting.

Your neighbor lets out a laugh and you feel it against your back, you blush as you remember how close you two are. As embarrassing as it is to have to be saved from a falling Christmas tree you don’t feel like leaving his arms quite yet.

Unfortunately, that decision gets made for you as your handsome neighbor removes his arms and yet again runs a hand through his hair.

A nervous tick perhaps.

Either way, it was cute and you smiled when it messed up his perfectly tailored mane.

“That’s the first thing you think of after I saved you from getting crushed by a tree?”

His goofy smile makes you want to melt and you’re mentally snapping a million pictures.

Normally when you see him he’s either rushing to leave his apartment with heavy eye bags or leaning his head against his apartment door with heavy eye bags.

You’re not used to seeing him look so happy and it’s doing things to your insides.

“Right I guess thanks are in order since you saved my life and all”

A contemplative look takes over his face and you watch his adams apple bob in hesitation. It’s only now that you realize he changed out of his T-shirt and sweats and into a pair of comfortable slacks and a Christmas sweater. It’s green red and white and the tiny reindeer on it make you giggle a little. You briefly wonder if he got it as a gift from a partner and the thought quickly wipes all the joy from your face.

“Technically you wouldn’t have died. I mean a tree this height and weight could possibly do some damage, especially to someone of a smaller stature but it would likely only result in some external bruising. Internal if it landed the wrong way and possible head trauma depending on how you landed when you hit the ground.”

Your eyes go wide as he explains the different injuries you could have acquired. You’re not sure how he knows all of this but you’d probably let him talk about anything for however long he wanted just to hear his voice.

“Well then I guess I really should thank you, Lord knows how insufferable I’d be if I got any bruising or head trauma”

The two of you smile at each other and you nearly get lost in the moment until the light flickers and it pulls you out of your daze. Your attention turns back to the tree and you rub your hands together to try and get them ready for another attempt at lifting the tree.

“Well then- shall we get to it?”

You turn back to your neighbor and he nods his head and joins you next to the tree. As the two of you are lifting it you’re surprised at how light the tree becomes with his help. Once the tree is leaning against the wall again you turn to him with a satisfied smile and raise an eyebrow in question

“What did you say your name was again?”

He turns to look at you and his head tilts slightly to the right. Again- puppy dog.

“Spencer, or Reid if you want. What’s yours?”

You give him your name and he mutters it like he’s testing the way it sounds on his tongue. Both of you seem to conclude that you like the way it sounds.

Twenty minutes and a lot of twisting and pivoting and sweating later the blasted tree is finally inside of your apartment. Somehow amidst all the commotion, you ended up on the ground in a heap of exhaustion, staring up at the ceiling and cursing the tree Gods.

“Well, it seems we ‘made it work’ after all” That sentence sounds a lot like the beginning of a goodbye and you’re not quite ready to say goodbye to your new friend Spencer so you swiftly hop to your feet and begin making your way to your kitchen.

“Well I think I owe you some hot chocolate after all that”

You don’t have to turn around to feel how hesitant Spencer is as he stands in your living room.

“You really don’t have to-”

You turn to him appalled, giving him your best ‘Are you kidding me?’ look

“Spencer, you saved my life out there! The least I could do is give you some hot chocolate”

His lips twitch up into a smile and you try not to fist pump as you realize he’s not saying no

While you make the hot chocolate Spencer peruses around your apartment observing every little detail like it’s the most interesting thing in the world. You hope to all Gods that you didn't leave out anything embarrassing.

As you make the finishing touches (whipped cream and candy canes are a must) you become curious at the sound of shuffling behind you, and when you turn around you nearly melt at the sight of Spencer setting up your Christmas tree in the corner.

God, why hadn’t you talked with your cute neighbor sooner?

“Oh! Spencer you didn’t have to do that”

He shrugs as you approach him and thanks you as you hand him his mug of hot chocolate. He takes a sip and hums approvingly. You try not to let it go to your ego.

The two of you stand there sipping on your drinks and admiring your hard work when you turn to one of the many open boxes in your living room full to the brim with decorations.

“So green and white or red and white?” You question as you stare at the colorful ornaments inquisitively.

You swivel around and are met with Spencer's smirking face once again

“Why not all three?”

~~~~

Decorating the tree with Spencer is both fun and frustrating. Apparently, he doesn’t get why you keep moving some of the ornaments he’s placing. You keep trying to explain to him that he’s putting them too close together.

“There’s a system with Christmas tree’s you know”

You tried to explain it but Spencer was a hopeless case when it came to decorating it seemed.

You’d left him to his own devices for three seconds and came back to three red ornaments in the same vicinity. You nearly had a heart attack. Spencer needed a Christmas miracle.

“Look Spence, You’ve got to place it…”

You came up behind him as he was placing another ornament too close to the other. Wrapping your arms around his in a similar way to what he did in the hallway you began guiding his arms to a better spot for the shiny ball.

“Riiiiiight here”

Even after the ornament was placed the two of you stayed in the same position, arms still reaching out towards the tree. If you looked close enough you would see his ears were turning red.

You quickly cleared your throat and removed your arms, Pivoting and heading for the kitchen. Unable to look him in the eyes.

“So- refills anyone?” You attempted a joke but were met with silence, and a glance back at Spencer showed him staring at the tree in a trance. You furrowed your brows.

Slowly you approached him and tapped him on the shoulder, the hitch of his breath the only indication that he acknowledged your presence.

“Look Spencer, I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable…”

His gaze snapped to yours, his body finally regaining its functions.

“No, it’s not that it’s just-” He nervously fiddles with his hands “Normally I’m not a physical touch person”

Guilt flooded your system and you unconsciously took a step away from him “Oh.. I’m sorry I-”

Warm hands reached out and latched onto you “No!” He flinched at how loud that came out “No- what I was saying was, normally I’m not but with you, it doesn’t feel so bad. You’re very…warm”

You had a feeling he meant it in more than just a physical way.

A shy smile slipped onto your face at the confession and you found yourself blushing once again.

“You’re warm too Spencer”

His smile mirrored yours.

“Hey, I was wondering- You can say no but there’s this Christmas movie festival at the park next weekend. I know we only just met but I’d really like to hang out with you more.” His hesitancy was cute, you could tell he didn’t have a lot of practice at asking women out but it was still charming and adorable nonetheless.

“I’d love to go Spencer”

He beamed.

“Great. That’s- that’s great”

You looked over your beautifully decorated tree. Admiring the way the greens reds and whites complimented each other. The way the lights reflected on them and made the room light up in colorful circles.

The way Spencer looked as the soft Christmas lights accentuated his soft features.

Thank God you decided to buy a real tree instead of piecing together a fake one.

Who knows if you would have gotten to know Spencer otherwise.

The thought made you upset so instead, you grabbed Spencer's hand and led him toward the kitchen

“C’mon, we’ve got popcorn garlands to make. The decorating is far from over”

His hand grasps yours tighter and he nods. Bright smiles never leaving either of your faces.

A/n: First Spencer one shot!!! how do we like it?~ Starry

#fanfiction #fanfic #fluff #fluff fic #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid imagine #dr spencer reid #criminal minds #upon a starry night writes #fic masterlist #christmas fic #ficmas 2023 #criminal minds fandom #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x gn!reader

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batmanisagatewaydrug · 5 months

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hey weird question but, with the context that while conspiracy thought in and of itself is just a sort of dangerous logical fallacy, most conspiracy theories have some kind of tie to antisemetism, are there any antisemetic aspects to gaylor theory? i can't think of how but somehow it almost always weasels in there, no matter how innocently silly something seems on the surface.

DEEP SIGH okay it's time to talk about Scooter Braun and his place in the Gaylor conspiracy

I'm not going to recap everything but will instead link you to this US Weekly article (I know, sorry) which is basically a fine summation of events despite being a bit sensationalist in calling a business disagreement between two adults a "feud"

tl;dr for anyone who doesn't want to read all of that (it's not actually that long, I prommy): in 2019 talent manager Scooter Braun acquired Taylor Swift's former record label Big Machine, giving ownership of the masters of her first six albums. Swift objected to this very publicly on the grounds that she wanted ownership over her own work and had repeatedly been denied the opportunity to buy it outright, while also alleging that Braun has been harassing and bullying her for years. ultimately, Swift has remained unable to buy back her work, leading to her steadily re-releasing expanded versions of her first six albums under the "Taylor's Version" headline.

obviously, given my stance against speculating on the personal lives of famous rich people, I'm not particularly interested in debating whether or not there's merit to Swift's accusations against Braun, although given the exploitative nature of the music industry I hardly think her claims are implausible.

regardless of whether or not Braun sucks as a person, it's important to note that he was only very briefly in ownership of Swift's discography: as the linked article above notes, he only owned them for about a year and a half before selling them off in 2020.

despite this, Braun holds what I would consider a rather outsize role in a lot of Gaylor conspiracy theorizing, with many apparently believing that Swift fully intended to come out in 2019 with the release of her seventh album, Lover, but was prevented from coming out by Braun purchasing her discography. I've seen some claim that he actively subjected her to homophobic bullying and others saying that she didn't him to financially benefit from any career boon she might have after coming out (although no one ever seems to have an answer for why she still hasn't come out three years after he sold her discography).

I can't say whether or not the majority of Gaylors, like, know or care that Braun is Jewish, but it feels tragically predictable and yucky that a Jewish man is given such a disproportional share of blame for why Taylor "can't" come out and is made a scapegoat in the ongoing effort to evade reality with "arguments" like this

(source)

... hang on, what's that?

oh man I love when a Jewish family gets put n SCARY ALL CAPS

okay so let's talk about Karlie Kloss and Josh Kushner!

as many of you probably know by this point, Karlie Kloss is the pinnacle of Taylor Swift's platonic gal pals that she gets relentlessly shipped with; I think it's fair to say that "proving" a romantic relationship existed between the two of them is the primary focus of a lot of Gaylorism.

since 2018 Kloss has been married to Josh Kushner, heir of THAT Kushner family. his infamous brother Jared is in fact Donald Trump's son-in-law and probably guilty of, like, a lot of federal crimes. that doesn't inherently make Josh a shithead or anything and he and Kloss both claim more liberal politics, although it should be noted that like a lot of rich liberals Josh does also suck pretty hard. he and Jared own a real estate management company together and were suing their tenants and evicting them during the COVID-19 rent moratorium, so that's kind of everything you need to know about him and Karlie Kloss IMO!!!

having said that, Josh being a bastard landlord doesn't make it appropriate to frame a Jewish family as having some kind of sinister interest in suppressing a queer woman's sexuality or imply that Kloss and Josh Kushner are in some kind of sham marriage. for YEARS Kloss' marriage to Kushner, including her conversion to Judaism and their two living human children, have been dismissed as elaborate turbo-bearding, with some Gaylors going so far as to allege that Kloss and Swift have actually been married for years and Kloss is just having Kushner's children for... reasons unknown... which feels like, you know. a pretty gross dismissal of a Jewish family in favor of pretending two WASPiest WASPs to ever WASP are secretly scissoring.

anyway I certainly don't think it's the most egregious or deliberate anti-semitism that's out there in the conspiracy world but are there some Gaylors blaming The Jews(TM) for forcing poor innocent Taylor to stay in the closet? resounding yes.

#gaylorgate

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akatsuki-shin · 4 months

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The world isn't fair to a lot of people but it was really unfair to Toji Zen'in. 😔

He can't choose the family he was born into. It wasn't his fault that he couldn't use Jujutsu. Even if he was strong in every aspect other than Jujutsu, the Zen'in family still abused him simply for the fact that he didn't have any curse energy.

When he finally found a woman he loved and had a son with her, his wife died young.

It's like he's not allowed to be happy at all, even just for a little bit.

All this time, we were shown how Toji didn't seem to care at all about Megumi, even to the point of forgetting his own son at some time and even sold Megumi back to the Zen'in clan for money.

But he actually just wanted Megumi to have a good life, and he thought Megumi would be better off living with the Zen'in clan than with him. He thought the Zen'in clan that discarded him would take a much better care of Megumi. Because unlike him, Megumi has the talent to be a Jujutsu sorcerer and might even inherit the Zen'in clan's hereditary technique. So he thought maybe they would hold Megumi in high regard.

Yet deep down in his heart, he actually didn't want to give Megumi to them. Even before he died, he indirectly asked Gojo to take care of Megumi.

Look how happy he is in his last moment when he found out Megumi stays a Fushiguro and didn't become a Zen'in. And he preferred to kill his resurrected self before he lost control again so he won't end up hurting Megumi again.

I think Toji chose that careless way of living, jumping from women to women, gambling, working odd jobs, etc not only because he probably doesn't know any other way to survive, but he just simply wanted to forget about everything.

After all, when he tried to live right, that happiness was immediately taken away from him and he was told to suffer again by fate. If so, won't it be better if he doesn't care about anything and anyone?

#Jujutsu Kaisen #JJK #呪術廻戦 #Fushiguro Toji #Zenin Toji

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vampire-exgirlfriend · 4 months

Text

Let's talk about Daemon Targaryen and his resentment of Rhea Royce and their marriage

*gif by @emilykaldwen (who is so brave for watching me scream about this)

I think so many people are happy to tie it all up neatly with a bow that says "he hated her because she wasn't a Targaryen and Daemon is a racist/blood purist." There is no question that Daemon is a very proud Targaryen, and that the Targaryens (and Velaryons, to a seemingly lesser degree) are blood purists, but to reduce Daemon down to this single fact is, in my unhumble opinion, incredibly lazy, and erases some of the more obvious and interesting things that I see frequently getting overlooked when it comes to his marriage with Rhea.

Daemon was knighted at 16 and basically immediately, Alysanne had arranged a marriage to Rhea Royce of Runestone. I would say, in part, it was because they were trusted vassal lords and that any children Daemon had with Rhea would have something to inherit due to his status as a second son (which we know is a major problem with the Targaryens, who had no plans for any kid that’s not inheriting the throne). But there is the flip side of that coin - Jaehaerys' I and Alysanne's child were dropping like flies, and it's made clear in the text that Daemon was more the Targaryen ideal than Viserys was, taking after their mother, Alyssa. "Maester Yandel said he was dashing, daring, and dangerous, but mercurial and quick to take offense. Archmaester Gyldayn wrote that Daemon was ambitious, impetuous, and moody, as charming as he was hot-tempered." He was strong. He was handsome. He was skilled with a sword and held in highish esteem for these things. And by this point, he was third in line for the throne (as Rhaenyra was a) a girl and b) an infant). And if we choose to follow the idea that Alysanne would attempt to have Rhaenys reinstated as heir, removing power and influence from other male Targaryens makes sense.

So he was essentially dragged into this marriage by his grandmother as a stop gap to any power or influence that he might attain being so close to the throne, when he was still a child (yes, I know 16 is considered adulthood in Westeros, but let's take a minute to remember the hormone soup our brains are at 16), and much like women of the time, was used as a way to shore up alliance/allegiance/military backing (let's ignore that the Vale was already locked into an alliance due to Aemma's marriage to Viserys). Daemon very solidly fits the “sold bride” trope that we see so much in ASOIAF (Sansa, Dany, etc). Now add into that the weird and fucked up incest bits and the Valyrian/Targaryen idea that if he had been a daughter, he would have been married to Viserys and not shipped off. He would not have been abandoned in this way had he been a daughter; his place within his family would have been secured, untouchable. He would not be alone.

So a beloved and revered member of their family ships him off to a strange place with zero Valyrian culture, which he had spent his entire life surrounded by and proud to be a part of, always told that Targaryens are closer to gods than men, to be the Lord Consort to a girl that he had never met, who seemed to feel the same disdain toward him that he later showed toward her. Within this universe, we see so many meta posts and fics where women/girls are forced into marriages they didn't want and the rightful resentment and anger that grows there, and we don't fault them for it. Why are we suddenly faulting Daemon for that same thing? At this point in his life, the guy is basically any other child bride, forced to consummate a marriage against his will in a strange place, removed entirely from his family.

Now this isn't to say that an idiot, angry, petulant 16 year old boy missed the big picture. With Caraxes at his side and any potential children inheriting Runestone, he could have absolutely taken Runestone and the Vale (which may have been what Alysanne intended). But he is an idiot, angry, petulant 16 year old boy who has been ripped from everything he knows, everyone he loves, and dumped into what he considers some backwater town and he's not fucking having it. Which says a lot about who he is. We see in both the show and the book that Daemon is fiercely loyal to House Targaryen, to his family, to the blood of the dragon. He craves that closeness, that proximity to them. Daemon is a lot of things, good and bad, and as GRRM likes to say, "an equal mix of dark and light."

The Dance of Dragons isn't just the house of the dragon tearing themselves apart, but a continuation of the stupidity and inaction of Jaehaerys I by Viserys. Everyone was let down by these men, and it resulted in the beginning of the end for their empire (we can dive into Valyrian/Targaryen supremacy another time). Daemon and Aemma were the start of it, the first of Viserys' victims. Then Rhaenyra and Alicent, Aegon and Helaena and Aemond and Daeron.

They failed everyone around them - Jaehaerys in his inaction in choosing a female heir under the appearances of keeping the realm placated and not disturbing the inherent misogyny of the lords of the realm, and Viserys for choosing not to understand his younger brother's emotional suffering nor protecting his daughter after he undid the tradition of male primogeniture for the Iron Throne (tradition, not law) and again when he didn't have oaths re-sworn to her after Aegon's birth and not codifying absolute primogeniture.

As for Daemon, morally gray characters aren't for everyone, even as much as we like to pretend they are. And that's what Daemon is - he is, at his core, incredibly morally gray. There is nuance there, and it's important. You don't have to like every character. But you can at least try to have a base understanding of the nuance that makes them them, and not be lazy about it.

#house of the dragon #daemon targaryen #rhaenyra targaryen #rhea royce #alicent hightower #hotd #jaehaerys i targaryen #asoiaf #a song of ice and fire #viserys i targaryen #fire and blood

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robthegoodfellow · 7 months

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No Romeo, But He’s My Loving One-Man Show

Mirror Sex, Roleplaying for Days 9/10 of @harringrovekinktober additional incidental praise kink, edging, fledgling D/s dynamic, cum play, slight feminization

(roommates, kink experimentation, billy is a femme fatale but really just a very good boy, nsfw)

Handy Links to Previous Chapters: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

Steve had expected Robin to have some pointed feedback after coming over for dinner and a horror movie—a longstanding tradition Billy had inducted himself into a couple days post move-in by rescuing the pizza from a crispy demise because someone forgot to set a timer—but when Steve met her for coffee later that week, all she talked about was the mirrors.

Why are there so many? Why are there more every time I visit? Do you know how many years of bad luck you’re risking? That old one with the fancy frame is definitely cursed—I saw something moving in it. No, it wasn’t us—something else. Like, out of the corner of my eye. It’s haunted, Steve—you should get rid of it. Don’t break it, though, whatever you do.

Finally, after much redirection and pointed questioning, she’d given her assessment on the Billy situation, specifically how Billy seemed to feel about Steve, from an outside perspective.

Mostly you both seemed normal, aside from sneaking looks at each other constantly. But even that’s normal, in a way. Her eyes narrowed. Is that why so many mirrors? More opportunity for sneaky looks?

Which—what? No. That wasn’t why—though he’d be lying if he said he’d never… But what did she even mean, that even that’s normal?

Well, like when we watch movies and something funny happens, you always look at Billy to see his reaction. And when the special effects are corny, he always looks at you and rolls his eyes. And when we’re all three hanging out, half the time it’s you and me trading knowing looks from inside jokes, and half the time it’s you and him. So, like—the looking isn’t new, I just caught you guys doing it without the other realizing it. Like a bunch of times.

Rather than deny it, Steve found himself asking, pathetically, how Billy looked. When Billy looked at him.

Like this, Robin said, and made the biggest, dopiest cow eyes, complete with dreamy sigh, reverent tilt of the chin.

Steve told her to fuck off, but couldn’t repress the grin splitting his idiot face, and Robin cackled.

Ask the haunted mirror, if you don’t believe me! It’ll totally back me up.

It’s not like they’d planned to make the apartment a fun-house mirror maze, but after the divorce, Steve’s mom went a little nuts selling off stuff from the Hawkins place, all of which was apparently unsuitable for her townhouse in Chicago, and when his dad made a stink about her disposing of hideous heirlooms intended for Steve, she’d promised to forward their son the remainder.

Which was how he ended up with the couch, complete with decorative throw pillows, and… about six ornate mirrors of varying unreasonable size. And sure, he could’ve sold them himself, because his dad didn’t actually give a shit, but then he’d sorta grown used to them, and Billy had never complained, so… yeah. Made the place feel bigger, or whatever.

Over time, the arrangement had shifted here and there—except for the one in Steve’s room over the dresser, the one in the bathroom over the sink—anyway, however it happened, Steve had noticed, one day, that he’d subconsciously mastered where to position himself throughout the sitting room to see a reflection of the kitchen, the bathroom corridor, and… Billy’s room, if the door was open—and, these days, it usually was.

Did he feel like a creep? Well, yes and no. Yes in that he was aware he should feel like a creep, and therefore did, and no in that he was almost certain Billy knew he was watching and didn’t care. Not only didn’t care, but… liked it.

After his conversation with Robin, though, he threw all subtly to the wind, staring fixedly at Billy’s reflection as he puttered around in the kitchen, as he left the bathroom, as he lounged in bed reading a book… silently daring Billy to call him out on it, until Billy did.

“Feel like a bug under glass,” he called, turning a page. “You gonna pin me down?”

Humming, Steve resettled against the arm of the couch, didn’t bother turning—just kept admiring him in the mirror leaning against the wall, almost floor to ceiling. The bedside lamp cast warm shadows, limning his hair in gold. Steve wondered if Billy got tired, holding the book above his face like that.

“I was thinking more like a spy tailing a mark.”

Billy laughed—a short bark of sound. One of Steve’s favorites. “Be dead so fast—made in seconds.”

“You saying I’m more Get Smart than Napoleon Solo?”

“Dunno,” Billy mused, thoughtful. Rolling, he made a pillow of his arms, crossed over the closed book. Leveled Steve a filthy smirk. “If you were 007, I could be your Bond Girl.”

That got Steve to turn around, meet his gaze direct, then cooed, all sympathy: “You wanna be tied up, babe, just ask.”

Billy bit the inside of his cheek, unwillingly amused, so Steve dialed up the cheesy charm.

“C’mon, that was good—Bond Girl? Like bond—”

“I got it,” Billy drawled, levering himself up only to flop against his piled pillows in supposed disgust, book cast aside. “Just call me Pussy Galore.”

“Dick Galore.”

Billy frowned. “Randy Galore?”

“A Bond Boy would have to be Randy Something,” Steve acknowledged. “Or… Something Hancock.”

They paused, then, in unison: “Randy Hancock.”

“And I, James Bondage, am tailing you,” Steve went on, as Billy snickered. “And haven’t been made, because I’m an experienced, accomplished spy—”

“Yeah, yeah, fine.” With a final snort, Billy folded his arms behind his head, semi-reclined, and pondered the ceiling, unfocused. “What next?”

Steve mimicked him, only on the couch, back to watching Billy’s reflection. “I use my handy spy-glass to peer around corners, and I catch you unawares—getting ready for bed.” Billy hummed, polite interest, and waited for more. So Steve gave him more, mind whirring, pulse already on the rise. “I watch you take off your shirt.”

Absently, only shifting enough to complete the action, Billy peeled his shirt off. Dropped it on the floor.

“Then your jeans.”

Those required a more aggressive shimmy, but soon they joined the discarded shirt.

“And then I can’t stop—can’t look away. Like I’m glued to the sight.” Steve’s throat clicked as he swallowed, trailing his palm down his stomach—indulged in a firm rub. “So pretty, spread out on the bed.”

On cue, Billy spread, thighs parting to reveal white briefs, the cotton worn thin, pink showing through where his bulge stretched the fabric. Sighing, a lazy hand skated south, fingers brushing the waistband. Slipped under, but no further. The fingers seemed to press—stalling the hips, an aborted twitch.

“Shit.” Steve wagged his head, corralling what remained of his wits. “I—uh, I figure…” He chuckled, let one heel drop off the couch to rest on the floor, his hand working a steady rhythm. “Figure I’ll learn what you like, use it to seduce you later. Learn how you like to touch yourself—”

Billy grunted, lashes stuttering as he shoved past the elastic, made a fist around the handful. Spoke soft, musing: “Haven’t, you know.”

“What?”

“Haven’t been—touching myself.” Eyes still on the ceiling, Billy’s lips quirked, just as soft. “Not without permission.”

That landed like a punch, loosing a long, meandering moan: “Baby.”

And the baby blues drifted down, met a reverent stare in the mirror. “Yeah?” So innocent, solicitous.

Steve rolled his hips into his palm, arching clear off the cushion. “I like that.”

Billy’s head lolled sideways, downcast—bashful as he squirmed, bulky knuckles straining the front of his briefs.

“My good boy,” Steve murmured. And he meant it with every fiber of his being: “Show me what feels good.”

His eyes fluttered closed. The hand slowed. “You.”

Simultaneous hits—to the heart and the heat low in his gut. A vicious press brought himself back under control.

“God—killing me.” Could barely huff it, all of him locked on the hand that had tugged free of clinging briefs to caress the red weeping cock, featherlight, through damp cotton. Steve’s pulse pounded so loud in his ears he more saw it than heard it—pink lips shaping You. You. You.

As though hypnotized, clumsy because he was so hard it fucking hurt, even sweatpants chafing awful against skin throbbing tender, Steve stumbled to the bedroom door—caught himself on the frame, panting, light-headed from the sudden vertical, essential bloodflow coursing elsewhere.

Billy choked off a whine, fisted the coverlet to either side, legs splayed as his spine bowed, sank back. “Please.”

In a blink, Steve was at the foot of the bed, crawling to him, over him, hips forcing Billy’s legs wide. “I got you.” Long, dragging grind, the rub exquisite. “I got you.”

The moan vibrated through Billy’s flushed chest. He hadn’t let go of the bedding—wouldn’t, Steve realized, winded anew. He wouldn’t let go unless Steve told him to.

“How long?” Steve panted, reaching down to rub Billy with the flat of his palm through the briefs, this jerking, gentle pressure that worked him piecemeal to the peak, a maddening build. “How long you been waiting for permission, baby?”

“Luh—” Billy coughed, swallowing spit. “Long.”

“So good,” Steve crooned. “I think you’ve earned a reward, don’t you?”

The flush had spread up his neck to his cheeks, temples pulsing red. He was nodding, mindless. “‘Kay.”

“All right.” Steve brushed the bulbous crown with a teasing thumb. “Tummy or panties?”

Muffled throaty sound—like he’d been stabbed. Delivered on a whimper: “Panties.”

Steve resumed his kneading rub, coaxing, fine tremors wracking the body at his mercy. “One day I’m gonna get you a nice pair. Maybe something with lace?”

Billy gulped, trembling nod.

“Lace for your pretty cock, a thong for that pretty ass?”

Half-lidded, head craned back, lip bitten raw between his teeth, Billy shivered.

“Make a mess in your panties,” Steve whispered, bending low. “And I’ll make a mess in them, too.”

A burst of guttural gasps, almost hiccups, borderline sob, and he convulsed beneath Steve’s hand, sticky wet seeping through the fabric.

Steve dropped a good boy with every kiss—on cheek, neck, sternum. Lifting up on his knees, he brought out his own cock, stripping it with a loose fist.

Half-boneless, Billy hooked lazy fingers in the back of his briefs, tugging them past the curve of his butt, the front pulled snug against his spent dick, and rolled onto his stomach. Arched, presenting himself, bare ass exposed, and Steve found his groove between plush cheeks, rutting with enough force that he could feel his cockhead rub against that tight hole.

It didn’t take long—short pumps, short of breath—brutish grunt as he finished, coating the pert cheeks in ropes of slick, deploying one hand to catch runaway drips, pet the clenching hole with wet fingertips, tease the entrance.

Billy cut off a whine, squirming, grinding into his own mess, pushing into the pressure behind.

“Soon,” Steve promised. “I’ll give it to you soon.”

An unspooling sigh, and Billy went limp, face turned away.

Planting a kiss at the base of a shoulder blade, Steve drew up the back of Billy’s briefs, smoothing a hand over the sodden fabric—with a wave of heat, imagined the trail of his come oozing toward the taint.

Shifting, Steve curled up along Billy’s side, nose to nose, arm looped around his sloping back.

Billy blinked, placid, as Steve drew a lock of hair away from his eyes.

“Ruined it,” he mumbled, mouth quirked. “The spy scene.”

“Nah,” Steve said. “A good spy knows when to change plans on the fly—switch it up.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah.” Warming to the idea: “What happened was—I realized I could offer you what you needed. In exchange for what I needed.”

Billy’s gaze was lulling as a lake in moonlight. “What did I need?”

Steve let a smile twitch, nerves singing. “Me.”

An echoing twitch. Lids lowered, a hitch in his tone: “And… what did you need?”

Steve dipped near, heart in his throat. “You.”

Billy hummed, a short burst trapped behind teeth. He nudged close, and Steve’s eyes slid shut.

Press of lips, lingering soft, on the edge of his chin.

“Steve?”

They’d been drifting awhile, lying flush, occasional brush of roving hands, warm gusts of breath. Belatedly, Steve hummed, enquiring.

“Itchy.”

He snorted, stretching like a lazy dog. Shower didn’t sound half bad, but there was something else he’d been wanting to try.

“How about a bath?”

Brows raised, pensive duck lips. Steve called his bluff—bowled him over, rough nuzzle, and hauled him upright.

Now with added next chapter: What He Does, He Does So Well

#harringrove #harringrovekinktober2k23 #roommates in love #sub billy hargrove #dom steve harrington #steve is a spy #billy's his mark #all fun and games #mirror mirrors on the wall

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